#vent 2/27/24

[venting-town]

Literally EVERYBODY is a burden on somebody/anybody/everybody/ /etc

Sometimes you’re not. And you still are.

Two truths, REGARDLESS of how supposedly “ contradictory” or “ complimentary “ they are or can be or not or etc, can be true at once or more or none or etc

Regardless of how healthy or unhealthy you are

No matter what we glorify or demonize

No matter

Matter

Etc

You’re a burden on somebody. And that can be neutral.

That can be bad

That can be good

That can be mixed

Etc

But everybody/somebody/nobody/anybody/ /body///etc is a burden

Vice versa

Human or spirit or soul or AI or demon or angel or god or holy or corrupt or unholy or lower or higher or equal or one or or or or etc

[chaoticace2005]

Reasons why Niffty might be so small:

(Related: list of why she has one eye.)

1. To represent the fact that her whole life she felt looked down on by people living in the world as a mixed-race woman in the 50s

2. So she can crawl through the vents easily.

3. Budget cuts. All the money for height was used on Angel, Sir Pentious and Valentino. So there was very little left for Niffty.

4. She was one of Santa’s elves until she fled to become a dentist.

5. Why aren’t YOU that short? God, some people!

6. Everyone else is abnormally tall.

7. To stab people’s ankles when they least expect it.

8. So she can be closer to the floor and closer to the bugs.

9. So she can fit in the oven to take naps.

10. It’s a good size to sneak up behind someone while they’re talking and stab them :)

11. Angel stole it from her.

12. She’s half Egg Boi.

13. With deals with Alastor when you trade away your soul you also trade away part of your height. This happened to Husk too to a lesser extent and is why Alastor can grow to be so tall.

14. She’s a bug puppeting a doll of a demon. This was the biggest size they had.

15. She was actually really tall in life and this is her eternal punishment.

16. Unlike the other characters she never got out through a taffy puller.

17. She’d be too powerful if she was any larger.

18. You need to sleep to grow. Niffty never does.

19. She’s Alastor’s ventriquist dummy

20. So her eye to body size ration is REALLY out of wack

21. She lost the bottom half of her body in the Great Pirate War

22. To consolidate her power. Short people contain energy in a smaller amount of space, making it more pressurized, the more pressure the more powerful.

23. The ears Alastor has actually used to be her feet, but she didn’t want them so she gave them away.

24. Rosie and Alastor got hungry once

25. Every kill she has takes a mm from her height (you don’t want to know how tall she was originally.)

26. So she can be closer in size to her greatest love, a roomba with knives.

27. She knife monopolied too hard once. Got in debt, you can fill in the blanks.

28. So her enemies underestimate her

29. So she can hide under your bed and you will NEVER know :)

[thelonelyempath]

Nonverbal Love Prompts (saying "I love you" without saying "I love you")

Laying on your partner's lap while watching a movie

2. Cooking your partner's favorite meal

3. Giving your partner a massage after a stressful day

4. Randomly hugging your partner out of nowhere (bonus points if you're not a physically affectionate person)

5. Forehead, cheek, nose, and hand kisses

6. Kissing your partner's scars to show that you care

7. Remembering a tiny, insignificant fact about your partner because you thought it was interesting

8. KIssing your partner's knuckles to ease their anxiety

9. Playing with your partner's hair until they fall asleep

10. Watching over your partner with adoration as they sleep on your lap

11. Buying/making your partner something that reminds you of them

12. Laying on your partner's chest and listening to their heartbeat

13. Holding your partner's hand in crowds so you/they don't get lost

14. Texting your partner to tell them you got home safe/make sure they got home safe

15. Cuddling your partner back to sleep after a nightmare

16. Listening to your partner vent about whatever's bothering them

17. Helping your partner with chores/homework

18. Sharing your food with your partner

19. Laughing at your partner's jokes, even if you don't find them that funny

20. Taking care of your partner when they're sick or injured

21. Giving your partner your jacket when they're cold

22. Tucking a strand of your partner's hair behind their ear to better see their face

23. Adjusting your schedule to spend more time with your partner

24. Getting your partner out of a situation that makes them uncomfortable

25. Intertwining your fingers with your partner's while making love

26. Holding your partner against your chest and letting them cry when they're upset

27. Giggling at how cute your partner is when they blush

28. Clinging to your partner when you're tired

29. Deep, passionate, breathless kisses that leave you aching for more

30. Dancing with your partner in the living room

31. Defending your partner in their absence

32. Smiling at your partner just to see them smile back at you

33. Back hugs

34. Having a conversation with your partner using only your eyes

35. Looking at your partner fondly, appreciating the fact that they exist and they're in your life

[oftenwantedafton]

Often Wanted Afton

Five Nights at Freddy’s

Fan Fiction Masterlist Part 2 (Part 1 here)

Welcome to my ever growing collection of FNAF William Afton and Reader themed stories featuring dark romance, older man/younger woman dynamics, angst, and, of course, smut. These are intended for 18+ viewers. All characters are age 18+. Please see ratings and warnings. Thank you for reading and enjoy!

A New Afton - Explicit

Stepfather Steve Raglan/William Afton x Stepdaughter Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - sexual content, daddy kink, praise kink, food kink, plushophilia, breeding kink, Springtrap suit sex

Tumblr Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

AO3 Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

Moody and Gray - Explicit

William Afton x Female Reader (FNAF game verse)

CW - sexual content

Tumblr Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

AO3 Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

The Perfect Girl - Explicit

Dave Miller/William Afton x Female Reader (FNAF book verse)

CW - sexual content, non/dub con, restraints, kidnapping, captivity, blood kink, voyeurism, violence

Tumblr Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

AO3 Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

Triptych - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton Stepfather x Stepdaughter Reader x Mike Schmidt (FNAF movie verse)

CW - sexual content, bisexual characters, non/dub con, date rape drugs

Tumblr Chapter 1 | AO3 Chapter 1

Secret Smile - Explicit

College English Professor/Vampire Steve Raglan/William Afton x Female College Student Reader (FNAF movie verse AU)

CW - sexual content

Tumblr Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

AO3 Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Revival - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Female Nurse Reader (FNAF movie verse)

Tumblr Chapter 1 | AO3 Chapter 1

Vent - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton/Springtrap x Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - childhood trauma/mental health issues/sexual content/blood and violence/blood kink

Previous Chapters 1-24 here

Tumblr Chapters 25-27 | 28-30 | 31-33 | 34-35

AO3 Chapter 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35

Night Shift - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Mike Schmidt x Mike’s GF Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - non con/dub con/sexual content/bisexual characters/blood and violence

Previous Chapters 1-8 here

Tumblr | Finale

AO3 | Finale

Quiver - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Goth Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - sexual content

One shot on Tumblr | AO3

Sticky Fingers - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Goth Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - sexual content

One shot on Tumblr | AO3

Indebted - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

Tumblr Chapter 1 | AO3 Chapter 1

Maybe - Explicit

Steve Raglan/William Afton x Female Reader (FNAF movie verse)

CW - sexual content

One shot on Tumblr | AO3

[prettyboychainsaw]

Gather up variants, cultists, software guys, business majors, and independent journalists alike for (the first?) Outlastober in the year of our lord, the Walrider, 2023.

I tried to get a good variety from all the currently out games. Feel free to write, draw, spatter, or whatever else you can think of for every day of October! Or every other day. Or not at all. I can't control your schedule.

Anywho, tag it with Outlastober2023 and @prettyboychainsaw so I can see it! Good luck! And remember, you're not a fighter.

Plain text under the cut.

1.) My friend, Billy.

2.) Wedding gift / something old, something new

3.) Broken lenses

4.) God?

5.) We want you!

6.) I Deserve to be punished

7.) Jane Doe

8.) St. Sybil

9.) Tongues and teeth

10.) Liver and tongues

11.) Silky

12.) Crown of thorns

13.) Trager Juice

14.) Life support

15.) Trinity

16.) Little pig!

17.) Committed

18.) Gluskin's Hell

19.) Elevator

20.) Beautiful

21.) Vulgar

22.) Frank's Kitchen

23.) Vents and grates

24.) Decontamination

25.) Nachtmahr

26.) Hope

27.) The morgue

28.) Fired

29.) Radio tower

30.) Numb

31.) Kill the snitch!

[voidedaurora]

Separate post this time, I'm going to be compiling evidence here for the convenience of everyone since alot of things were found/expanded upon in replies to asks! 1. Khai Lying about her age to get into mels server, thus encouraging Khai to continue lying about her age to get into more spaces she's not intended to be in Evidence: Khais intro stating she's 16 (6/24/2024)

Khais birthday is (8/19/2008) This makes her 15 years old Stating she was born in 2008

Khai herself stating she's 15 years old 2 months after her birthday

Stating she was 14 years old a year prior

Mels Server rules as of a few days ago stating the server is 16+ no matter if you are new or a returning user. (assuming its the same and she didn't change the requirements just to let khai stay or something)

The point of this claim is to show Mels willingness to allow Khai to lie about her age to get into spaces she's not allowed in, This encourages her to continue these behaviors and endangers others around her in the process. (Mel is aware of her past behaviors/habits of doing this to befriend 18+ accounts, go into nsfw servers, erp servers, befriend adults on vrc, etc.) 2. Mels claims about feeling repetitively pressured/forced to go through with us all having "group activity" Evidence: Mel's statement through Gaia about how she'd felt about the interactions essentially saying she felt pressured to engage in sexual interactions with the both of us

"Group activity" happened for the FIRST time around March 30th 2023, the second instance (the one I sent screenshots of) happened 7/27/2023 Mel explicitly stating 15 days before the 1st interaction that she did not feel pressured by either of us, considered us "good people to be around", and even stated her "depression weeks" weren't as bad. An overall positive mentality for someone who felt "pressured and repeatedly asked to engage in sexual interactions" Along with me explicitly telling her that she did not have to go through with anything

Doodles after the 2nd time, this is when she was apparently feeling "uncomfortable" and "hadn't enjoyed it"

Highlighted Statement

Doodles

Addditional note, I'm not sure why someone who had no "genuine enjoyment" from any of these activities would out-nut the initial number of encounters (2) but that's up for you to debate/think about

3. Supporting screenshot for the claim I made about the S/A (Specifically the fact she'd admitted to me she'd only slept with us both to sleep with me) Her stating she felt clover was in the way of her getting with me

Additionally I'd like to mention (I obviously DO NOT have screenshots of this but apparently she's vented at least once about her feelings for me/clover being "In the way" within the beloveds group aswell, I probably will not look for/ask for these screenshots since It was a vent) 4. Threats

Self explanatory. (obviously not mel but still not ok, I do not believe she's told anyone not to attack me)

Theres a clean laid out thing for easier viewing

[star-dust-shark]

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32,33,34,35,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,44,45,46,47,38,49,50

For the ask thing <3

Woah holy shit

1. ( a nickname of mine? ) Will, Pookie, Brother

2. ( an embarrassing story? ) I once showed a preppy girl a picture I drew of gay furries kissing when I was like nine

3. ( a turn on ) @crowwolf8

4. ( a turn off ) bad hygiene and jerk personality

5. ( something I look for in a partner ) kindness, a nice ass /j, funny and caring

6. ( about my best friend ) I have a few, but @lucasthedoofus-mushroomskulls is the coolest guy ever and he makes me rlly happy and @justagremlinoncaffeine is a cunt ( /j ur so cool ily /p )

7. ( about my worst enemy ) he’s toxic and mean and I hate him so so so much :3

8. ( about someone I think is cute ) hehe I love him :3 ( my bf )

9. ( about someone I think is smart ) smartest girl or maybe even person I’ve ever met, she’s nice and laughs at my jokes even when they’re bad :D I sit with her in French class

10. ( about someone I think is funny ) you laugh at his jokes and then question urself ( lucas, one of my besties I tagged )

11. ( about my crush ) he’s so sweet and so nice and so funny and cute and strong and erm yeah- I’m not a simp trust chat

12. ( about my parents ) I love them most of the time more so my dad I think my mom can be…

13. ( about my siblings ) my brother is annoying as fuck love him tho

14. ( something I like about my body ) nothing lol

15. ( something I dislike about my body ) everything

16. ( something I like about my personality ) I’m sorta funny I think

17. ( something I dislike about my personality ) most things but specifically irl I’m really mean haha

18. ( a quote I live by ) WE HAD A BONDING MOMENT!!! I CRADLED YOU IN MY ARMS!!

19. ( my favourite book ) ermmm probably any pjo novel or spvtw comic

20. ( my favourite movie ) any horror one or star wars one ( attack of the clones, a new hope, Alien, I know what you did last summer, a quiet place )

21. ( my favourite food ) I don’t like food much but maybe gummy sharks

22. ( my favourite drink ) MONSTER MONSTER MONSTER

23. ( a talent I have ) NONE 😭

24. ( an unusual talent I have ) I once armpit farted fifty times in a row 🎀

25. ( one of my favourite followers ) GYATT DAYUM UH- @iloveyapping @justalunaticfangirl @imarayoffuckingsunshine @imqueerandadeer and others

26. ( fictional character I relate to ) Will Solace and Tobias Eaton ( vent warning? )

27. ( my favourite book I read for school ) charlotte’s web

28. ( my favourite play ) idk I haven’t seen many

29. ( a childhood memory ) crying when I had to get off a ride at the fair

30. ( my best birthday ) I don’t really know actually maybe my twelth

31. ( an embarrassing secret ) I’m gay 🫣

32. ( a little known fact ) I’m homophobic

33. ( a time I made a mistake ) dating my ex like girl is a mistake in herself ( my bad chat but she was horrible to me )

I KNOW U ASKED MORE I WILL UPDATE I JUST NEED TO SLEEP NOW LY CHAT

[snowyaika]

to start off strong, and to give me more motivation to write, i’m opening my asks for requests!!! please feel free to request certain characters or prompts, whatever you’d like!! 

here’s a list of some dialogue i’m up for putting into my work!! but you can always request more than whats put here!!!🫀

[angst]

1: “i wish you never had trusted me.”

2: “i guess this is a lesson in not trusting people, right?”

3: “none of it was real, but i wish it was.”

4: “from the day we met, i knew i’d hurt you eventually.”

5: “i told you not to get too close to me.”

6: “i never loved you.”

7: “what was going through your head when i told you i loved you?”

8: “say you never loved me, say it.”

9: “what are you going to do, shoot me? do it.”

10: “don’t make me kill you.”

[hurt/comfort]

11: “you are what’s important right now.” 

12: “i don’t have anyone anymore.” “ you have me.”

13: “it’s okay, you know. if you need to vent.” 

14: “please don’t go.” 

15: “why didn’t you tell me the nightmares were back? you know i never minded helping with them.”

16: “you know my door is always open to you.”

17: “you shouldn’t smoke, you know.”

18: “you shouldn’t be out here by yourself.” 

19: “you’re not as bad as everyone says you are.”

20: “i just thought you’d like some company.”

[fluff/humor]

21: “are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you?”

22: “i don’t think i’ve ever seen you smile.”

23: “i knew you had a heart.”

24: “would it be too cliche if we matched armor?”

25: “quit smiling at me, you’re making me mess up.” 

26: “i’m trying my absolute hardest to see things from your perspective, but i just can’t get my head that far up my ass.” 

27: “i don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how i feel.”

28: “i turned out liking you a lot more than i originally planned.” 

29: “don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.”

30: “i just lied to a guard, am i badass or what?” 

aanddd there we go!! as of right now i’m open to all characters, but i cannot promise they will all be romantic! if i don’t feel confident enough writing for them, i’ll just make it platonic! 

also i see other writers do this, where people have their own anons! if you’d like to be one, do your thing! 

ask away! 🫀

[ms-m-astrologer]

Transiting Mars enters Aquarius

Tuesday, February 13 - Friday, March 22, 2024

If Mars must be in an air sign, this is probably the best one. I have a soft spot for the placement; it makes me think of engineers and rocket scientists - of “shadetree mechanics” in the 1910s, working on a Ford Model T; of early radio afficionados in thr 1920s, clustering around their equipment, trying to pick up a new faraway station.

This is Mars in pursuit of a grand idea. Remember that Saturn is the traditional ruler of Aquarius; when Mars hangs out in Saturn’s signs, he can acquire a sense of guidance and direction for all that energy and drive. Tangible achievements in Capricorn; brilliant ideas in Aquarius.

How this tends to play out in Mars’ different areas:

Physical strength - team sports; but also is quite content working on its own. I’m thinking track and field as the ideal sport. Can be fascinated by all that complicated, exotic exercise equipment.

Energy levels - has to watch out for the toll that “burning the midnight oil” can take on the body. It won’t be good if we burn ourselves out intellectually, either.

Sexuality - friendly, fairly open about it; not extremely romantic, as the reproductive urge is seen as being just another healthy bodily function. Be careful not to get too detached.

How we go after what we want - Saturn’s influence makes us want to have A Plan, but in Aquarius we’re a little more willing to experiment. “My way or the highway” if we feel weak or threatened.

If you want to try doing something in a new way, this is a wonderful time for that. We’re in an experimental frame of mind, wanting to innovate.

Give a few days on either side of these aspects:

Tuesday, February 13 - Mars/Aquarius conjunct Pluto/Aquarius, 0°46’. Starting things off with a bang. Something drastic comes up, and we see an opportunity for changing things up.

Friday, February 16 - Mars/Aquarius trine Pallas Athene/Sagittarius, 2°53’. Brilliant ideas and leadership. We’ll do even better if we collaborate.

Thursday, February 22 - Mars/Aquarius conjunct Venus/Aquarius, 6°57’. Friends to lovers? This is more falling in love with an idea, and is more humanitarian than romantic.

Tuesday, February 27 - Mars/Aquarius square Jupiter/Taurus, 10°52’. Taking on too much; poking the wrong bear. Can be very cruel. It’s okay to take calculated risks, if we make sure our calculations are correct.

Wednesday, March 6:

Mars/Aquarius sextile North Node/Aries, trine South Node/Libra, 17°24’

Mars/Aquarius sextile Chiron/Aries, 17°32’

If the square with Jupiter got us out of proper alignment, these aspects can get us back together and on track. We do have a right to independence and autonomy. But don’t get too cocky or bloodthirsty….

Saturday, March 9 - Mars/Aquarius square Uranus/Taurus, 19°51’. …ugh, back to the “cruelty” thing, except way way way more volatile. And cold-blooded. Accidents and contrariness.

Friday, March 15 - Mars/Aquarius sextile Eris/Aries, 24°29’. A healthy outlet for venting all our frustrations. We could find equally pissed-off groups and align with them.

Monday, March 18 - Mars/Aquarius trine Vesta/Gemini, 26°44’. We’re mentally focused, with clear ideas and direction.

[keeskiwi]

I had a lot of fun doing Avian August this year, but the focus on a single family of birds had me thinking a lot about how much I love cuckoos and the sheer variety they have, so I decided I would make my own list... Please join me for #Cuckootober !!

Prompt list in plain text under the cut:

1. Striped cuckoo (Tapera naevia) 2. Red-crested malkoha (Dasylophus superciliosus) 3. Lesser ground-cuckoo (Morococcyx erythropygus) 4. Running coua (Coua cursor) 5. Yellow-billed cuckoo (Coccyzus americanus) 6. Violet cuckoo (Chrysococcyx xanthorhynchus) 7. Dwarf cuckoo (Coccycua pumila) 8. Scale-feathered malkoha (Dasylophus cumingi) 9. Pavonine cuckoo (Dromococcyx pavoninus) 10. White-eared bronze-cuckoo (Chrysococcyx meyerii) 11. Black-faced coucal (Centropus melanops) 12. Lesser roadrunner (Geococcyx velox) 13. Green malkoha (Ceuthmochares australis) 14. Dwarf koel (Microdynamis parva) 15. Pallid cuckoo (Cacomantis pallidus) 16. Rufous-vented ground-cuckoo (Neomorphus geoffroyi) 17. Fork-tailed drongo-cuckoo (Surniculus dicruroides) 18. Channel-billed cuckoo (Scythrops novaehollandiae) 19. Moustached hawk-cuckoo (Hierococcyx vagans) 20. Guira cuckoo (Guira guira) 21. Sumatran ground-cuckoo (Carpococcyx viridis) 22. Chestnut-winged cuckoo (Clamator coromandus) 23. Black-bellied cuckoo (Piaya melanogaster) 24. Groove-billed ani (Crotophaga sulcirostris) 25. Sirkeer malkoha (Taccocua leschenaultii) 26. Pheasant coucal (Centropus phasianinus) 27. Crested coua (Coua cristata) 28. Hispaniolan lizard-cuckoo (Coccyzus longirostris) 29. Yellow-billed malkoha (Rhamphococcyx calyorhynchus) 30. Pacific koel (Eudynamys orientalis) 31. Common cuckoo (Cuculus canorus)

[venting-town]

Also I’m fairly certain I remember my ex step father ( before my mother retardedly married him ) touched me IN OUR OLD HOUSE

The one me and my mom ( and my dad, before he and my mom divorced ) lived in

I was on my changing station

He laid me down on it and started touching me. I had no idea what was going on, but he kept doing it

Some other kids were there ( they were older ) and they saw and freaked out on him.

He became aggressive with them

I don’t remember what happened next, but apparently he assaulted me WAY before I was forced to move in with him

Im still glad I got to abuse him back ( he deserved it; reactive abuse is not true abuse and I’m glad I made his life worse and physically/mentally/emotionally/spiritually harmed him, just like other demons and angels and souls and aliens and etc. You’re retarded asses aren’t exempt ).

Im also glad I get to hurt his gang buddies, which they have been stalking me for a while now, just like he has.

They especially didn’t like that I remembered that they had kidnapped me and I was looking up their drug bust they did because I WAS THERE WHEN IT HAPPENED.

And that their buddies had tortured me after their leaders got caught.

But I still hurt them. And I will continue, with all my other spiritual selves and others as well.

We’re still watching you all and have you on lock down btw.

Youre retarded asses have had it, you stupid ugly ass fucks.

[vibratingskull]

The last farewell

Part1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28

Tags : Angst/hurt/comfort, physical remission, hospital, reader is disabled

You spend your time in the hospital learning how to walk again when Thrawn visits you with an unexpected demand

FemaleReader x Thrawn

“Another step”, the meddroid proposes its voice echoing in the gymnase. 

You hold down the parallel bar and take another step, unsure. 

You're trembling, searching for your balance on those robotic legs. You're not used to them yet. They feel foreign to you despite connecting to your nervous system. Your muscles are shaking as you relearn how to walk. 

You lost so much. 

“Continue the rehabilitation, you are on the right track!” the droid speaks with what is surely supposed to be coded as excitement in the voice, but it just comes out weird. 

You sit on your wheelchair and take out the legs, you still have an immense hill ahead of you. 

You sigh. You're tired. 

“Let's go to your room,” the droid informe stepping forward to push you. 

“No. I'll do it myself,” you decide, waving at him to get out of your way. 

You roll in the hallway, lost in your thoughts. You have so much work ahead of you, so much to reconquer… You're supposed to receive the visit of lower officers but you don't want their pity thrown in your face, you need peace. 

You want peace. 

You arrive at his room. 

You don't get your hopes up, but you can't help it. 

You pass the door… and sigh. 

Vez is still in a coma. 

You roll up to his bed. 

“Hello friend. It is particularly sunny today, you would love to stroll in the garden and sketch some plants.“

He is unresponsive. It's not like a doctor told you he would wake up soon, but it still pains you to see. 

If they have been cruel to you, they have been down right animalistic to Vez. His legs have been cut and he lost both of his lekkus. You're not totally aware of what it entails but you remember the lekkus hold some brain tissues. The docs say he will not have long term brain damages but you doubt he will see it that way. What they took was irreplaceable and you're afraid of his reaction. 

For now he's sleeping peacefully as you were, unaware of his body's damages. Like you his brain puts him in a deep sleep to prevent him from damaging his psyche, docs say he will wake up when the brain will have finished processing what happened but he can still hear around him and feel some sensations. So you come here everyday to talk, to vent, to speak of everything and nothing, trying to put him at ease the best you can. You take his hands, caress his forehead, his cheek, you tell him tales of Ryloth and your own planet, anything you could think about. After the Chimaera left you both at a military hospital you observed these habits religiously. Thrawn wanted first to put Vez in a civil hospital but you refused and fought him on that until he surrendered. You wanted to be here when your friend woke up. 

“I'm making progress with the legs, I thought they would be heavier but once they have been connected to your nervous system they are so light.“

Your hand reaches for the metallic apparatus they jabbed in your spine to control the legs and grazes it lightly.

“We don't stop medical progress,” you say almost to yourself.

You hear his bed neighbor cough, you tilt your head to see if they need help. 

“By the way, yesterday your mom tried to see you. She can't because it's a military hospital but your family is worried about you. I could discuss a bit with her, you're so alike it is fascinating, you caress his cheek, you take his hand and squeeze it. Don't worry, I'll ask Thrawn to put pressure on the direction so she could see you.” 

“A Grand Admiral influence is not supposed to be used as such,” a voice rises behind you. 

You jump in your wheelchair before turning your head to Thrawn, hands clasped behind his back with an interrogative gaze. 

“You scared me,” you chastise him. “How did you know I was here ?” 

“I knew you would not be present at your own meeting with the officers, you were not in the gymnase, it was the only logical option.” 

You nod. Of course. He comes to sit next to you and observe the body of Vez in silence. 

“He did not wake up?” He asks with a soft voice. 

“Not yet,” you shake your head. “The doctors aren't optimistic.“

He nods in silence. 

”Why are you here ?” You inquire. 

He turns towards you with a puzzled look. 

“To give you what you asked me,” he responds like it was obvious. 

You can see the bag he's transporting

“Yes of course, but what are you doing here, on Coruscant ?” 

“I have a martial court about how I supposedly almost destroyed a city to retrieve you.” 

You flush. 

“Didn't you ?” You tease. 

“Absolutely not, each parameter was studied to do the least damage possible, but it was impossible not to deal some damage to the buildings nearby. The arrest of a large slave abductors demanded some sacrifices.” 

He sounds almost angry, but you know better. You hide your smile, it is pretty funny to see Thrawn flounder in politics, it has an innocent and moving side to it. Without thinking about it you take his hand and kiss it. He looks you in the eyes with an unreadable expression. You immediately regret it, maybe he doesn't like physical demonstration of affection in public… 

“Let me escort you to your room,” he says. 

He rises and goes to push your wheelchair, once again you refuse. 

“No, no, no. I can do it. Let me do it.” 

You head towards the room, side by side, he gently adjusts his pace to yours. You advance in silence in the corridors. 

You really hope you didn't cross a line with him… 

You enter, he goes straight to open the window while you maneuver to go to bed. He closes and locks the door and sits on the bed. You look at him with sorry spelled in your eyes. He grasps your hand and caresses it with his thumbs. 

“ I heard you will soon be interrogated by the ISB agents.”

“In three days,” you sigh,” it promises to be hilarious.”

“It is for the good of the Empire.”

“Sure…”

You gulp, in reality you try as much as you can to not think about what happened or you feel yourself overflowed by hate, anger and sorrow. 

It’s eating you alive, terrifying you. You may or may have not exaggerated certain symptoms to get a higher dosage of the drugs to get high and forget. You don’t brag about it to Thrawn, obviously.

“ The date of the trial have been chosen,” he continues

You dig your nails in the sheet.

“Okay…”

Thrawn already explained to you how Nather was surprised by the flash operation, how him and his goons fighted in each rooms, how much lives he took, how he almost made the entire structure collapse on itself with everyone under it when he realized he was trapped but was swiftly disarmed by a precise shot of one of the Stormtroopers. Now he remains silent, surrounded by his army of lawyers in the prisons of the Empire, he refuses to give any intel or names to the ISB agents, hiding behind his pride and his fan. As a prominent Governor he doesn't get the rough treatment, but they are not nice to him either, he holds on surprisingly well. 

You’re not ecstatic at the idea of seeing him again, even in the perspective of his own trial. You’re happy justice will be served, but you don’t know how you’ll react in his present. Will you burst into tears or try to kill him on the spot? Maybe you will go into a deafening torpor and dissociate completely from your body. You don’t know… for now the simple idea of seeing him again makes you sick. 

Thrawn puts your hand to his lips and kisses it delicately. 

“I know it is painful and uncomfortable, but it must be done, he tries to comfort you, be strong.”

You gulp.

“ … Will you be with me?”

“ I have to give my own testimony, so yes. I will be at your side.”

You feel relieved to hear that, knowing that you won’t be alone in this trial alleviate the pain and ease the knot in your stomach.

Thrawn reaches for the bag, changing the difficult subject

“I brought you what you asked for.”

You take it to verify what it holds. You found your purse, the key to your apartment, some holos, your personal datapad… You thank him with a heartfelt smile. He nods with a serious face. 

“There is also an important matter I wish to discuss with you,” he says with the most stern face. 

“Okay ?” 

You brace yourself, he looks a bit tense and that scares you. What could possibly put him in this state ? Are you both suspected in the affair? Did you do something wrong? Outside of getting yourself imprisoned like a damn rookie. Is he gonna criticize your tactical decisions on that day? Is he entangled in problems after helping you out? Did they criticize him for engaging in armed conflicts while on supposed vacation. Come to think of it, he surely didn't take any vacations and planned this from the beginning. 

You look at him ready for any slap across the face, but he manages to surprise you. 

“(Y/n), would you live with me?” 

The air is punched out of your lungs and you can't think straight during three seconds 

“ Would I… What ?” 

By reflex you retract your hand from his and pull the sheet over yourself. 

“Would you live with me?” 

“Yes, I heard the first-I mean… Urgh... Why ?” 

He holds his chin like he is gathering arguments. 

“I do not think you will be able to keep the apartment Governor Satlove is paying for you.” 

You tried to push that thought away so many times, but he's right, unfortunately. 

“And I am already living in the apartment you rent me, I think we should try.”

Well, you didn’t see him as that keen but it looks like you were wrong. And you can’t help a snarky remark.

“ Isn’t it just an adroit ploy to stop paying me your rent?” You grin.

“ No, I am serious, I think we can both benefit from that idea.”

“ I know. It’s a joke. I was joking.”

He looks like he’s computing the info. 

You munch on your lower lip, feeling like a little girl. You giggle, squirming on the bed like a child. 

You never lived with one of your… partners? 

“It seemed to me like a good solution, but I understand you would not appreciate the idea,” he tempers.

“No, no, no! It’s a good idea! It’s just… It’s so sudden.”

“ I figured that is what people like us tend to do.”

“ And what “people like us” are?” You ask.

He seems to think about it.

“Ch'an'ecivon'ot.”

“I have no idea what that means.” You smile wryly

“In basic you would say…” He caresses your hand with the tip of his fingers “Soulmates.”

You freeze again, processing the info.

“That is what we are then?” you ask breathlessly. “Isn’t it a tad dramatic?”

“You think?” He smiles lightly “I thought about us and I liked how that sounded.”

He seems to notice your reluctance.

“I shocked you.”

“No? No, no,no” You try and temper “It’s just that you're coming out really strong and serious and…”

“Yes, I am serious. I am serious about our relationship. Are you not?”

“I… Didn’t have time to properly think about it.” You admit.

He gauges you up and down.

“Do you love me?” he asks bluntly.

You're so taken aback, being cornered like that. Your mouth and throat are dry, you open your lips to speak but nothing comes out.

You love him.

You do, oh yes you do.

But you never worded it, and even less spoke it out loud.

He seems to relax and smile sadly at your discomfited expression.

“Pardon me. It is wrong of me to ask you without telling you first. I should not have put you in a corner like that.” He gently holds your face and kiss your forehead, “Do not fret, cha’cah.”

You slowly relax under his touch.

“Alright, I must go now. I wish you a rapid recovery… “

He seems to hesitate. 

“And come back to me quickly,” he said it so low you almost didn’t hear it.

But you did hear it.

He kisses your forehead and leaves the room.

You look in your purse if he didn’t put your comlink in, but find something else. With a raised eyebrow you take out the envelope simply signed with “Eli”. You completely forgot about that. You never took the time to read the last letter your friend left for you.  You open it carefully, taking ou the folded sheet of paper.

“ (Y/n), I hope this letter finds you better than when I left. I must leave to help Thrawn, but I trust we will see each other again, if you stay by his side it is bound to happen, I am sure. Do not leave his side, it is the most secure place in all the galaxy, and I have reason to think you are not safe. I had the occasion to speak with Governor Satlove alone, and this man sent shivers down my spine, I see nothing behind his eyes but a black void. I do not trust this man (Y/n) and so should you, something is not right with him. He made some inappropriate advances and tried to convert me to his church without my interest. I pushed him back but he insisted. There is something about him downright animalistic and uncivilized despite the dignity he drapes himself in. I had the occasion to speak about it with Thrawn and he agreed with me. Do not refuse the help of a friend, and accept my warning. I picked upon your disdain towards me recently, and even though I don’t know why I want you safe. If I ever did something to anger you, know that I am truly sorry. I wish I could tell you face to face, but I have to go. 

Farewell my friend, I hope to see you under better auspices.

Eli.”

This time tears roll down freely, your body is shaken by sobs, your hands holding the letter tremble erratically. 

“Eli… Oh Eli…” You cry.

How could you? How could you doubt him? Your own friend. But maybe you don’t deserve to call him friend after how you treated him. You hold the letter against your heart. He never deceived you, it’s all Nather’s fault, isolating you more and more, until you had no friend remaining. But he couldn’t get rid of Thrawn and Eli completely. And he won’t be able anymore…

“Hey, girl! How are you feeling?”

You raise your head in surprise, an overjoyed Karyn is here but her expression changes immediately when she sees you crying. She immediately sits on the bed and takes your hand.

“What’s happening (Y/n)?”

“Eli… Eli…“ You can’t formulate a proper sentence.

She takes you in her arms and cradles you.

”We will find him. I promise,” she assures.

She doesn't know the truth, and it is not your place to reveal it. So you just hug her back, squeezing her in your arm, appreciating the warmth of a friend.

@bluechiss @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar @thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay

[caramelcuppaccino]

lunlun's autumn studying challenge! #studyingunderthefallingleaves

Hi and hello everyone! Welcome to my blog and my studying challenge! ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧ My name is Lunlun. I am creating this challenge because my uni started on October and I want to motivate myself and keep track of my studies. I hope you will participate and enjoy the challenge too!

• How to participate?

Just reblog this post! You don't need to follow me or anything like that. And do not forget to post your posts with the hashtag #studyingunderthefallingleaves so that everyone can see your posts! You do not need to start at a certain date. I wouldn’t even mind if you started the challenge during summer :] Just try to enjoy it and make sure you’re taking breaks and taking good care of yourself!

• Prompts:

Day 1: Welcome! Let’s start with a simple question: What is your major/What do you study?

Day 2: Share your goals for this challenge. What do you want to accomplish by the end of it?

Day 3: What does autumn mean for you?

Day 4: Share a song that has autumn vibes with us.

Day 5: Why did you choose your major/what you study?

Day 6: Are there other languages you learn besides your native langauge? If so, which ones?

Day 7: What is the best place to study for you in autumn?

Day 8: What do you like to drink while you study? You can share the recipe if you want!

Day 9: Do you have a memory, which happened during autumn, you remember with a smile on your face?

Day 10: What is your favorite thing about your major? Why?

Day 11: Which one of your courses do you like the most? And the one you just can’t like no matter what you do?

Day 12: Do you have any studying methods you use? If so, share them with us (please *sobs*)!

Day 13: Which one do you prefer: Digital devices and online platforms or notebooks and books? And why?

Day 14: Share a picture of your favorite pen/pencil!

Day 15: You’ve finished the half of the challenge (for now as more prompts will be added), so let’s look back at your goals. Are you getting closer to accomplishing them?

Day 16: Share an article you’ve read and enjoyed recently.

Day 17: What is your favorite thing about having a studyblr blog?

Day 18: Share a YouTube channel and/or a podcast you like to watch/listen that inspires you.

Day 19: How was your day? You can talk about anything; vent or share a moment. I personally am willing to hear!

Day 20: Where are you from and how is the school system in your country? As a prospective teacher, I like to hear about different education systems. For example, in my country, we have a 4+4+4 system where students study elementary, middle school and high school (seperately) for four years. Most departmens in universities are also for four years; however, medicine students, for example, have to study for six years.

Day 21: Share a random fact you know.

Day 22: What is your best feature according to you?

Day 23: Okay, you have to praise yourself with at least two sentences. Go! I am listening!

Day 24: What do you think about homeworks? Do you think they are necessary or just burden for students?

Day 25: What was your favorite subject as a child?

Day 26: What advice would you give to people who want/will start to study your major?

Day 27: What book are you reading right now? Do you like it so far?

Day 28: Share a playlist you listen to while studying.

Day 29: What is your favorite autumn food?

Day 30: It’s been a month already! How are you feeling? Is keeping up with the challenge tiring? Have you enjoyed it so far? Please share your thoughts!

• From Lunlun: I will add more prompts later, probably for 30 days again. I am posting this part for now as if I try to write more now, I know it’ll take more time for me to share the challenge and don’t wanna miss autumn!

Tag List (let me know if you’d like to be tagged!):

[grimoiregradient]

A Month of Mental Wellness - February Spell A Day Challenge

I wanted to write this month’s challenge focused on both self love and mental health in general, so this is the resulting theme- taking care of yourself and your mind. As always, don’t be intimidated by the concept of doing a spell every single day. Just focus on creating or writing the spell, and if you have the energy to perform it, go ahead and do as many as you can!

Day 1 | Spell | Courage

Day 2 | Bath | Mindfulness

Day 3 | Spell Jar | Gratitude

Day 4 | Potion | Beauty

Day 5 | Glamour | Confidence

Day 6 | Sigil | Shadow

Day 7 | Spell | Vent

Day 8 | Charm | Growth

Day 9 | Divination | Fears

Day 10 | Sigil | Acceptance 

Day 11 | Bath | Mental Stimulation

Day 12 | Ritual | Inner Monologue

Day 13 | Spell Jar | Happiness

Day 14 | Spell | Self-Love

Day 15 | Glamour | Respect

Day 16 | Potion | Connection

Day 17 | Sigil | Journal

Day 18 | Spell | Inner Child

Day 19 | Divination | Progress

Day 20 | Charm | Grounding

Day 21 | Bath | Reflection

Day 22 | Spell Jar | Routine

Day 23 | Sigil | Rest

Day 24 | Glamour | Communicate

Day 25 | Ritual | Habit

Day 26 | Divination | Reframe

Day 27 | Bath | Comfort

Day 28 | Charm | Boundaries

Day 29 | Spell | Forgiveness

[t1redallthetime]

1. The lesbians from next door + Trina

2. Mendel, you know what you did

3. Mendel, the actor playing him is always really charismatic but I don’t get the Mendel hype

4. The lesbians from next door, I swear to god people always forget them!

5. I love them equally but Trindel a little less

6. Holding to the Ground

7. Hard choice but The Marriage Proposal

8. This Had better come to a stop

9. Year of the Child

10. Everything from Gotta Die Sometime, especially Jason’s Bar Mitzvah, I cannot listen to that song without crying :(

11. Obviously Marvin

12. If I could change it, I think I’d have a Whizzer+Trina duet and I’d have a scene where Marvin meets the Lesbians

13. Father to Son changed my view on Marvin, it gave me hope for him, and for my own father

14. 100% Day in Falsettoland, that song is SO fun and I’m Breaking Down cause duh

15. Charlotte or Trina, they’re the ones in my vocal range, but I would definitely play Marvin if someone to a bit of a genderbend version

16. Trina, she has my heart, also me and the lesbians would have such a good polycule

17. I’d want to get to know the lesbians better cause we don’t know so much about them!

18. Best decision is definitely Jason having the Bar Mitzvah in the hospital

19. I’d sing with Cordelia, I feel like she’d be so fun to be with at karaoke

20. Stephanie J Block, you have my heart and soul ❤️, and Christian Borle is up there too

21. When I try to get someone into falsettos I make them listen to This Had Better Come To A Stop, really good introduction to the basic concepts

22. Idk I can’t really decide!

23. How bad act 1 Marvin is and how he definitely passed away after Whizzer :(

24. I’m not sure, I don’t really have an answer to that

25. The three I relate to a lot are Trina, Marvin and Jason, their little fucked up family speaks to me

26. Lesbians + Marvin’s friendship, and Jason and Whizzer’s

27. “Everything will be alright” genuinely use this in my day to day life if something goes wrong, gonna get a tattoo of this someday

28. Marvin hitting Trina was so fucking heartbreaking and made me hate him so much

29.

I fucking love this image

30. I just want to vent a little, Marvin is really similar to my Tata (dad) and it was kinda nice to see someone like that go through an arc and improve as a person, my Tata has a lot to do but he is trying to change. Father To Son used to make me so jealous I’d cry, because Jason’s father improved but mine didn’t, but know that he’s trying it makes me almost happy. Anyway that’s my addition! This show means so much to me ❤️

[galaxywarp]

Hey Blue ;v; I just have something that I need to get off my chest, I need to tell somebody, so I hope it’s okay if I tell you: I have a problem with weed. As in, I need to stop using it. I’m thinking of, like, giving my stash to my friends so I can’t use it as easily. I need to tell my counsellor. But I’m scared. I need help. (Btw it’s not like it’s illegal here, it’s legal where I am. I’m scared because I’ve never dealt with something like this before)

Also, I have a question about your sobriety tracker (bc I use it too, just not for substance use) : when do you start tracking? From the last moment you put the drug in your body, or the first moment you sobered up from it/weren’t high?

And… I’m not weak for having a problem with weed, am I? Just bc like. It’s not a hard drug or anything, it feels kind of stupid to have this happen 😭

(Ugh I need to just say it. I’m addicted to it. Thankfully I don’t have much opportunity to use it, but I use it every chance I get, and I just broke one of my own rules that serves as a restriction)

Hi friend. Thanks for reaching out. I’m glad you’re on the step of your recovery where you can acknowledge you have a problem. That’s a really rough step

Especially because of the weird mixed signals and attitudes around weed addiction. I understand where you’re coming from.

And if it helps, this is me, a certified tweaker who used to OD on fentanyl regularly: your weed addiction is still real and still serious and you still deserve support.

Addiction is addiction when it’s hurting you. It sounds like you’ve come to acknowledge that weed is hurting you but even though it is, you’re struggling to stop.

You’re not doing it because it’s fun. You’re doing it because you feel like you need it and going without it is painful. I’ve felt that way about numerous drugs in my lifetime, and weed is definitely one of them. I would smoke myself so numb for months or years on end and it was absolutely miserable.

Im sorry you’re going through this. I have hope you’ll be able to overcome this. Im glad you shared this with me and I hope you can share it with others too.

If you do decide to quit, I know there’s a lot of stuff trying to claim that weed has no withdrawal symptoms. I don’t think that’s true. From lengthy personal experience I really don’t think that’s true. Heroin and meth were soooo much more extreme, don’t get me wrong. It’s apples to oranges — it can’t be compared

But when I stopped smoking pot I felt achy and agitated and bored and restless and upset and don’t let anyone, including yourself, invalidate that you feel shitty. It’s gonna feel bad for a bit and you have every right to own that. Don’t deny yourself some days of lying around whining and snacking and trying to distract yourself.

The good news is, after 2-3 weeks, you’ll start feeling better in a way you probably haven’t felt since you started smoking 24/7

If you need someone to vent to during that time, my askbox is open

Phew! That’s a lot. For your last question: my exact sobriety dates in my trackers are actually ….very loose

The short answer is that my memory of those times is very distorted because of, y know , drugs

The longer answer includes that I picked my dates as dates when I made a conscious decision that I wanted to quit.

My fentanyl date: September 27, 2019

I came home from a camping trip with my family. Because I was in the woods sleeping in a tent with them all weekend, I couldn’t bring my drugs. And I was gonna be in withdrawal

But I had saved a few suboxone from my last detox clinic and I used them over the weekend to keep the pain manageable (suboxone is used for opiate withdrawal so I had been prescribed it off and on for years)

When I got home I still had a small bag left of fentanyl.

I decided….i wasn’t going to buy anymore

And over the next few days I used what was left, all the way down to desperately licking the bag and smoking burnt tin foil, trying to wean myself so my withdrawal symptoms weren’t as bad

And then I ran out. And I stopped. And now im 4 years clean from it

Very similar story with my meth date: April 1st 2023

I still had a little bit of meth left but that was the day I said I didn’t want to get anymore. And when it was gone, it was gone. And now it’s been over a year