#which automatically makes me cranky

[diemauergone]

not to sound awful but , making a woman who is 2 years older than me , cry is an accomplishment today. and in my defense, she made my 13 year old niece feel like utter shit and someone HAD to call the woman out for being an ass.

[starkeyisthelastname]

Do you think pornstar!rafe and reader would ever have kids? Like there’s no way this man DOESN’T have a breeding kink……

because after you get pregnant the first time.. the man won’t stop 😩

I personally see Pornstar!Rafe as a boy dad first. When he finds out it is a boy he’s terrified to say the least. He went into this automatically thinking it was going to be a girl, which he could handle. Right? A boy that could potentially end up like his own fucked up self was something he couldn’t do. He had such a shitty relationship with his own father that it completely freaked him out to have a son of his own. The last thing he wanted was for his first child to resent him one day.

Rafe didn’t cry. He shut all of those emotions off and had for a long time. It was like the second he laid eyes on his son though, everything he had held in for years came out and he couldn’t keep the tears from flowing. He didn’t want to let go of him, and promised himself that he would never make his boy feel like his own father had.

Now.. as far as a breeding kink. It was as soon as your son could walk, Rafe was at it like clockwork. It’s like he fell even more in love after you had his first child and couldn’t stop himself from cumming deep up inside you every night. It’s not like you could even think to stop him either. Once this man’s dick was inside you, you became dumb on it. It was as if all you could do was nod when he asked about having his baby again.

“You wanna make me daddy again, huh? Fill you up with all my Cameron babies over and over.” Rafe would rasp in your ear as you had barely recovered from another orgasm, just to feel his warm seed paint your insides.

You were only a day late when you decided to take a test just for the hell of it. Surely you were about to start your period. You had been cranky, your boobs had been sore and you were having light cramps, all indicators that you were about to start. You sat the test down without too much thought, and went about your business. You had completely forgotten about leaving it on the bathroom counter until you and Rafe were getting ready for bed that night.

It was him coming out of the bathroom, a smirk on his face as he held the test up. “Think it’ll be a girl this time?” He asked, watching you look at the abandoned stick that read the word PREGNANT clear as day.

[ghulehthezombiequeen]

Here kitty kitty - Sodo x reader

masterlist.

author's note: i felt bad after dropping three angst fics and then disappearing into the void so have some wholesome sodo 🫶

also i have a headcanon that all the ghouls purr whenever someone pets/scratches their sweet spots and they just melt in your arms and its just so absjdifhfbdbdjsjak i'm in love

other things to note: no pronouns used for reader, sodo gets kinda subby so if you squint there's a bit of suggestive tones (you'll have to squint so hard you can't see though)

word count: 877

“Hey, is it true that ghoul biology is similar to a cat’s?” You asked curiously, looking up from the book you were studying. You and Sodo were in the rehearsal room; Sodo was sitting down on an amp, practicing his solos for the recording of an upcoming album, and he wanted to get it down perfectly. You were just there because you didn’t want him to be lonely. “Um, yeah, why?” Sodo asked, keeping his eyes on his guitar. 

“Well, I’m just studying for my test, and… it says that to earn bonus points on the test, if I’m able to, I have to… um… make a ghoul purr.” You felt your cheeks burn as the words rolled off your tongue, and Sodo stopped playing abruptly. He stared up at you, trying to decipher if you were being serious or not. 

“…You what?” 

“It says only if I’m able to!” You defended yourself.  “Wait, wait, wait… let me get this straight.” Sodo uncrossed his legs, putting his guitar to the side gently. He then looked at you with a raised eyebrow. “You’re asking me… to help you get bonus points on a test… and you have to make me… purr?” He grimaced. 

“Um… yeah. That- that’s what the book says, anyway.” 

“Also, remind me why are you even taking that ghoul biology class? You’re not even a ghoul!” He frowned. 

You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Papa Secondo says that it’s good for a Sibling of Sin to memorize the biology of a ghoul inside and out just in case a ritual goes wrong and someone gets hurt. And it’s a required class for me to take before I take his Latin class.” 

“….Alright, that does seem like a valid point. Alright,” He sighed, folding his arms and standing up, walking over to the couch you were sitting on and looked down at you. “I’ll help you. But only because I know how cranky Papa Secondo can get.” 

You gave him a cheeky grin. “Wait, really?! Oh my gosh, thank you thank you thank you!” You jumped up and excitedly gave him a hug. You thought you were going to have to ask Rain or Mountain to help you, which would probably take longer considering their schedules were filled to the brim with activities. 

“Yeah yeah yeah, alright, okay, get off.” He grumbled, blushing as he automatically put his hands on your waist. He’d never admit it, but he loved hugs. 

“Sorry, sorry.” You giggled, pulling away. 

“Alright, so what do I have to do?” He sighed. He looked like he was already over it, although it had barely started. 

“Here, sit next to me.” You beckoned, and he sat to your left. You glanced at your book, reading the common sweet spots to scratch. “Alright, let’s try… the ears.” 

Your hand slowly went behind his ears, your nails gently scratching the soft fluff, making them twitch at first but stilled as you continued. Sodo let out a small hiss, not expecting the sudden stimulation there. His fangs started to poke out of his lips. 

“I’m not hurting you, am I?” You asked as you stopped scratching once he hissed.  “No… you’re fine. I just- wasn’t expecting it to feel like that.” He mumbled. 

“M’kay.” You continued scratching behind his ears, which flickered down then stilled. You felt a low vibration begin, and your eyes wandered to Sodo’s eyes, which were closed tight. “M…m…mrr….” He grumbled, causing you to laugh.  “Aw, this feels good, doesn’t it?” You asked, and he nodded vigorously. You glanced over his shoulder at the open book, reading that another sensitive spot was the top of their heads and their chins. You opted for his chin, bringing your other hand to rub his soft jawline.  “Mmm… Mrrrr… mrow… ah..” Sodo’s eyes widened as his mewls grew louder, his cheeks turning red. You bit your lip to hold back another giggle, but you couldn’t contain the smirk on your face. 

“Mrrrow…. Ah- hey! D-Don’t…. Mrow… Don’t laugh at me….” He growled, but it morphed into a purr, causing your giggles to spill out of your mouth.  “Awww, you’re so cute! Are you a good kitty? Yeah?” You cooed, continuing to scratch his chin and now the top of his head where his scalp was. When you moved your hand to the new area, his tail flicked against the back of the couch, hard. It then started wagging, tapping against the soft pillow behind him. 

He started purring like crazy, nodding vigorously at your question. “Mrow… y-yes, yes…. I’m good.. I’m a g-good kitty…” 

He started to curl up closer to you, his leg already on your lap. You scooped him up in your arms so that he was curled safely on your lap, continuing to scratch and pet him. 

You had sneakily pulled out your phone and snapped a few photos of Sodo in your lap, as he never usually acted like this. He hissed as he saw you put your phone back, to which you replied with a giggle, “Photo evidence. It’s what the book says.” 

He grumbled something incoherent but kept mewing and purring. 

As you reveled in this moment, you remembered: you’ll have to do this again for the end of the year-review test. 

[pepperonidk]

Insomnia || l.sm

MASTERLIST

Pairing: dk x gn!reader

Summary: sleepless nights are no match for dk!

Warnings: none

Word Count: 954

a/n: when they say self insert i mean i inserted myself… wrote this at 3:45 am last night bc i was having insomnia…

“Baby,” you heard a low grumble from beside you as you tossed and turned for what felt like the millionth time that night. “Go to sleep”

“Go to sleep?” you mumbled under your breath sarcastically, annoyed at the remark but not wanting to fully wake up the peaceful figure who lay beside you. “Why didn’t I think of that hours ago?”

You were cranky, for sure. After all, you were feeling tired — your eyelids heavy and every so often slipping into hazy visions that blurred the lines between sleep and consciousness. But for some reason, you just could not sleep. Just before the peaceful calm of sleep could fully wash over you, it was as if an alarm rang, alerting you back to the real world and you’d turn the other way, hoping that it would help but to no avail.

With a huff you turned away, envious of the soft snores that escaped your boyfriend’s lips. Although this wasn’t a normal occurrence, it happened enough that you knew how your insomniac episodes could affect your mental health. Too many hours of just staring at the shadowed walls in your room never led to anything better than insecure thoughts creeping into your brain.

Knowing that those thoughts would make their way to you soon, you reached behind you in search for an anchor to some semblance of peace and found your boyfriend’s hand, intertwining your fingers with his. Even in his sleep, his fingers reacted automatically, spreading and making room for your hand to fit in his. A soft sigh of relief escaped your lips.

Now feeling less annoyed, you turned back to face him and a small smile found its way onto your features as you admired him. You slipped your hand out of his slowly, opting instead to trace the lines of his face, not wanting to touch him in fear of waking him. “Good night, Seokmin,” you whispered.

At the sound of his name, however, you watched his eyelids flutter half open, enough to see you with your hand nearing his cheek and a dopey smile on your face, which he mirrored almost instantly.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked in a much gentler, albeit hoarse grumble than earlier. Now it was his turn to reach for you, his fingers pushing a strand of hair back, now hassled from hours of movement. Your own eyes fluttered shut at the contact, feeling comforted by the touch. You shook your head no as his hand came to land on your cheek, his thumb rubbing softly against the skin.

Seokmin let out a sad sigh, knowing how miserable you feel after having an episode and he wishes he could have been awake earlier to help. But he knew you hated to wake him, believing that his sleep was too precious to lose in the hectic life of an idol. He appreciated the thought, but he always slept better when you were also sleeping peacefully beside him.

Glad that he’s at least awake now, he wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you right into his chest. You nuzzled into the crook of his neck, taking in a deep breath, the comforting scent of your laundry detergent and remnants of his cologne filling your senses. He had one hand stroking the back of your head, and the other on your lower back, slipping up inside your shirt to rub gentle circles on your skin, knowing it helped you sleep.

“Like they do with babies,” you had told him once when this happened earlier in your relationship. “My mom used to do that for me when I couldn’t sleep.” He took the advice to heart, and now the actions came naturally to him.

“I know you didn’t wanna wake me,” he began softly as you felt his chest move with his voice. “But you know you always can. It’s never a bother to be able to hold you close like this.” The slight airy chuckle that rumbled through him was a signal that he could feel you smile against his chest.

“You know,” he continued. “The first time you ever asked me to hold you like this because you said you had insomnia sometimes, I thought you were coming up with an excuse to get me to stay the night.” He laughed again, tightening his arms around you and pressing a kiss on the crown of your head before continuing. “But I was still so nervous. I remember my hands shaking, and I was hoping to God, Buddha, anyone, that you couldn’t tell. So I rubbed circles on your back, hoping to hide it, and when you said that’s what your mom did to help you, I felt so much relief.”

He let out a soft yawn, before continuing. “I never actually fell asleep that night. I just kept rubbing your back, worrying about how you would get enough sleep, so I just kept going because I couldn’t tell if you were asleep.”

By now, Seokmin knew the signs that you were slowly making your way into a true sleep. He could feel your eyelids falling shut against his skin, even as you instinctively tried to fight them open, and he felt your breathing begin to slow as the hand you had clinging to his side began to loosen its grip. He smiled softly, leaving a final message before you fully fell asleep.

“I love you,” he said, nuzzling his cheek against you. “And I’m glad you love me. Dream of me, because I know I’ll dream of you.”

The last thing you’ll hear before finally dozing off is Seokmin’s quiet humming, a lullaby that you’ve heard him sing before lulling you into a sweet dream.

taglist: @yksthings @coveyland @xuimhao

[themakeupbrush]

I will say that I know I have a frankly unnecessary amount of fashion knowledge and I don't automatically expect everyone to know everything I do (contrary to how some of my posts sound). I know a lot of people who even follow this page use it for inspiration for art/OCs/etc and have no real interest in the nitty gritty details. That truly doesn't bother me at all, no one can, should, or cares to know everything about every topic.

And I'm more than happy to share what I know with people who want to learn! With the caveat that I am completely self-taught which means that 1) there are gaps in my knowledge and 2) honestly, you could learn the same things as me for free. I don't ever want someone to feel scared or stupid for not knowing something about an incredibly specific topic.

What does bother me, and makes me sound like a cranky old lady in some of my posts, is people who aggressively and loudly pass judgement on topics they have absolutely zero knowledge about. If you're going to be a bitch, at least be an educated bitch.

[rottenbrainstuff]

Bg3 redo thoughts: after I finished my very first big amazing bard drow durge playthrough, I’m going back and doing it again with a tielfing paladin, to see what different things I run into and whatnot.

I’m really enjoying all the small little details and updates that have been changed since I last began a playthrough: stuff like Astarion’s boar now sometimes being found in a different spot. When I went into the spider cave, this time I noticed flies buzzing around the corpses… I swear I don’t remember seeing that detail there before?

Since my tav this time is a tielfing, she’s not getting her ass kissed by the goblins anymore, which is interesting. She failed an intimidation check with the goblins at the windmill so we got into a fight. Well. My guys are tired and health is low and there’s a lot of goblins here but whatever, we’ll see how it goes.

Then I hit Fezzerk one single time and he surrendered. Lmao! I had no idea that was even a thing that happened, it’s been so neat to see that even though my first playthrough was extremely thorough, there’s still been neat stuff to find.

I didn’t automatically decide who I would romance this game, I thought I’d just sort of let things happen as they happen. The end result is: I’ve got Gale and Astarion’s romances locked in now. I really just don’t get the folks who say they have such a hard time romancing Astarion, or even just getting him to like them. He’s consistently always the second in line for me, behind only Gale. Possibly Lae’zel would be quicker if my tav made less decisions that pissed her off, but it seems that they’ve also made some changes with recent patches and she needs a couple conditions to be met now before she starts talking about how much she likes your stink. I mean I haven’t even got to the necromancy of Thay yet, or Gandrel, or the goblin camp. I triggered his first romance after I recruited Karlach.

Astarion gets cranky at a few choices in the grove, but I mean, so does Wyll, so does Lae’zel. I dunno. Like, here’s some quick tips if you guys aren’t just making jokes and do legit have a hard time making him like you:

You can send him back to camp, along with Lae’zel, as soon as you enter the grove, because they’re both going to be cranky. Once you’ve talked to Zevlor and saved Arabella you can bring them back. Astarion likes Auntie Ethel so be sure to bring him back before you chat with her.

He has a lot of little cut scenes and special dialogue, and a lot of little approvals come from these and they add up. I wonder if people are missing these. Be sure to camp often. Like seriously. Camp all the time. There’s the first night camp scene, the musing about how would be best to die, the stargazing scene (although I dunno, I don’t think that gives any approval?) musing about what each companion would taste like, the drunk from bear blood scene, and the mirror scene.

If he’s on your party when you visit Raphael he has a couple approvals to give there if you refuse to be Raphael’s toy.

When he bites you, you’ll get five approval the next morning if you tell the other companions they can leave if they’re not happy about a vampire in the group, and you’ll get five more approval if you don’t force him to keep biting you, but instead just agree to his plan of biting enemies. You can get almost 30 approval just from the bite scene alone!!!!

Like I said, I triggered his first romance after I recruited Karlach: I had barely even left the grove at that point. I wasn’t being evil. I only sent him back to camp for two events (talking to zevlor and saving Arabella). I think I still could have romanced him just as early even without doing that. It shouldn’t really be this hard. I know it’s funny to joke about how he hates everything you do, but if you guys are seriously having troubles with it, I dunno send me a DM and I can help maybe, I’ve been very thorough in my analysis of his approvals.

[frodo-with-glasses]

More Reading Thoughts: Many Partings

Oh, oh oh oh, the chapter title is a mirror to the Fellowship chapter “Many Meetings”, don’t touch me I am cri

Aragorn: “Hello! Don’t ask; I know you want to go back home.” Frodo: “I do. I want to see Bilbo even more. I was sad to see he didn’t come with the others.” Aragorn: “Well, he’s getting really old, dude.” Frodo: “EXACTLY WHY I NEED TO GO.”

In which Arwen gives Frodo her golden ticket to Willy Wonka’s choco—I mean Valinor

Oh and he also gets another necklace

Eeeeyyy resolution to Eomer and Gimli’s little spat!

Eomer and Gimli are the politest, most gentlemanly simps ever

I love how much effort the book puts into acknowledging how honored Theoden was. Eowyn’s fear was that her family would be disgraced and forgotten, with no more dignity than a peasant living in a dirty thatched hut, but all this pomp and circumstance proves that the line of Eorl is still honored and respected and loved.

GHAN-BURI-GHAN

THE CHAD AND HIS HOMIES RETURN

HELLO I LOVE YOU WE WILL LEAVE YOU ALONE GOODBYE

I got so emotional about the drums, bruh, that’s literally beautiful ;~;

MERRRYYYYY *sobs*

I LOVE YOU MY SON. AAAAHHHH TToTT

“HAIL, EOMER, KING OF THE MARK!”

They’re in good hands.

Trothplighted! Now THAT’S a word!!

Aww, Eowyn and Faramir got engaged in Rohan! That’s cute :-3

Well there go all my goofy headcanons about Eomer being a cranky, overprotective brother and giving Faramir the side-eye. Even he just likes him automatically. Bummer. And here I was hoping for some funny family drama!

Eowyn: “Whaddya think of that, former crush? :-3” Aragorn: “Couldn’t be prouder :-D”

Okay yeah so when I read the last chapter, I wrote this thing at 3 AM like “kinda not digging how the book barely mentions what angst Elrond would be feeling over never seeing his daughter again ever; even the movies take the time to explore that (even if they paint Elrond as the bad guy who gets in the way of love)”, but at least here Tolkien gives us a mention of it. That’s nice. Please don’t just ignore Elrond’s feelings, the man’s been through enough.

OOH! A gift?? A gift for Merry??? I’m very interested—!!

GASP IT’S THE HORN

THAT’S GONNA BE VERY IMPORTANT ISN’T IT

PRETTY SURE I’M REMEMBERING SOMETHING ABOUT THE SCOURING OF THE SHIRE AND THE HORN BEING VERY IMPORTANT

Aaaand they all hug! Awww!! TTuTT I’m gonna have so much fun drawing this LOL

“And they drank the stirrup-cup”. Thanks to this line and Google, I have now learned a thing about the traditions of the Scottish Highlanders.

Legolas, upon visiting a cave: “Welp, you beat me. I like caves now.”

TREEBEEEEEARD!!

QUICKBEEEEEEEAAAMM!!!

MY FAVORITE TREES I LOVE YOU GUYS

In which Treebeard cusses out orcs in Entish

In which Treebeard admits that he bored Saruman nearly to death!!

Oof, that’s not the smartest thing you’ve ever done, King Tree ol’ pal. But I forgive you. I won’t call mercy a weakness.

I love the mental image of Quickbeam bowing “like a tree bending in the wind”. They are not VERY bendable, but they can be a little bit!

There are no Entings :-C

Gimli, begrudgingly: “FINE I’ll visit the forest, I guess.”

Gimli calling them “my hobbits” noooo 😭😖😭😫🤧😭😭

STOP SAYING “I fear we shall never meet again”, IT’S MAKING ME SAD

Bye, Legolas; bye, Gimli! Love ya both, you hilarious nerds.

Merry and Pippin get one last drink with Treebeard! Yaaaay!! 8-D

Bye, King Tree, I love you!

Aragorn threatening to spy on Pippin and call him back in service to Minas Tirith is hilarious and very on-brand

Ooh, red sunset and a green flame…wow.

That’s so evocative and I can’t find the words to express why.

Bye, Aragorn. Love ya, long man.

Well, well, well! Bo and lehold, look what the cat drug in! It’s Saruman!

Me when Saruman chews out Gandalf: LOL

Me when Saruman breathes wrongly in Galadriel’s direction: oh he’s dead 8-.

Y’know, it’s funny. Grima’s fear of leaving Saruman is a lot like the fear people often have of leaving abusive relationships. However, Grima has everything he’d need to actually make a departure, things that other people stuck in abusive relationships might not—a support system, financial freedom, another place to stay, and people who would help and protect him—and yet he chooses none of it, and goes back to his oppressor. Fascinating.

OOP. OKAY SARUMAN TALKING TO THE HOBBITS NOW, EVERYBODY SHUT UP.

Saruman: “You cruel little urchins. Come to mock an old beggar, have you? I’ll bet you wouldn’t even give me a bit of pipe weed.” Frodo: “I would if I had any.”

That is the KINDEST 1000 IQ gigachad own I have EVER seen. Frodo like, “I have gone through untold hell, but you can’t make me cruel to you, no matter how much you try.” LIFE GOAL: BE LIKE FRODO

And Merry like, “Here, I’ve got some pipeweed, you can have it back.” My favorite hobbits, everyone. The chads. The absolute legends.

*mutters to self* “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; and in doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head…”

Merry’s sarcastic “thank you!” to the curse on the Southfarthing tho X’-D

Merry: “Can I have my bag back?” Saruman, a petty wet sock: “NO”

I wonder if the Shire has a thing where you can like. Sue for damages to person or property. ‘Cause that seems to be what Pippin is implying here by “what about our claim for kidnapping us”. In which case, Pippin half-joking about suing a wizard is VERY HECKING FUNNY

Also would like to point out that Sam didn’t say a word until Saruman was gone. I can only imagine he was just sitting in the background glaring at him the whole time.

Aaaand they let him go. Hahaha. Doom.

In which Gandalf, Galadriel, Celeborn, and Elrond speak in telepathy, wooo~

In which Sam still wants to see Elves, even after he’s been riding with Elves this whole time

BILBOOOOOOOOOO

BILBO MY LOVE I’VE MISSED YOU

Just the fact that the hobbits run to find him without taking off their coats or eating or washing up. That’s like charging into a house to see somebody, with your coat and shoes still on, leaving dirt on the carpet but neither of you care. It’s so emotional and full of love and I just aaaaahhhh— 🥹😭🥹🤧😭

Bilbo will never not be competitive, LOL! “I wanna be older than the Old Took!”

“How splendid! How wonderful! But where were we?” Bilbo I love you

“Yeah I was invited to Aragorn’s wedding and all that, but I was busy and I didn’t want to pack.” BILBO I LOVE YOU

“Didn’t go to the wedding because I couldn’t be arsed” is such a HUGE MOOD

Ohh, the melancholy of watching the weather changing and knowing you’ll soon have to leave

Also Frodo and Sam same brain

“Except the Sea.” Stopppp I’m gonna cry—

“To their delight, Gandalf said: ‘I think I shall come too. At least as far as Bree. I want to see Butterbur.’” AND ROAST HIS TOES

Aww Bilbo getting old and forgetful. It hurts, but it’s so sweet ;u;

“May come in useful, if you think of getting married, Sam.” 8-D 8-D 8-D hahaha yesss, tease the boy

Bilbo: “I don’t have gifts for you.” Pippin: “Okay, but consider: what if we sass you?” Bilbo: “Haha, you make me so proud! I lied. Have some pipes.”

Bilbo: “B-T-dubs, where’s my ring?” Frodo: “Er, I kind of threw it into a volcano, Bilbo.” Bilbo: “Oh, yes, that’s right! That’s what the whole thing was about, isn’t it? Silly me.”

Bilbo being just as interested in oliphaunts as Sam ;u;

REPRISE OF “THE ROAD GOES EVER ON!” SHUT UP I CRI

Just the way they let him nap for a while before talking again. It’s such natural comedy, and also very sweet and warm and full of love and just aaaaahhhh

Also Frodo agreeing to finish Bilbo’s work. There’s something so emotional about that. Makes me think of Christopher and all the work he did to preserve his father’s notes…I wonder if he ever made the connection himself. I wonder if he saw himself as his dad’s Frodo.

And we end with some foooooreshadowing….

Friendly reminder to everyone who complains that the RotK movie has like five different endings and that’s too many: The book is worse. The book is so, SO much worse. 🤣

[yourdeepestfathoms]

idk if anyone else has said it yet, but i’m feeling bitter right now, so i will (also it’s just always bothered me)

has anyone else ever noticed the difference in fan opinions between Michael and Vanessa?

in many ways, they are VERY similar characters.

they’re both night guards, have been fucked over by William, killed kids, and barely actually show up in the games.

however, Michael is treated like a goddamn king by the fandom, while Vanessa barely gets scraps. she’s regarded as a bitch so often, is hated on constantly, and/or is sometimes flat out ignored or erased from stories entirely.

oh no! a woman is grumpy! she MUST be a bitch!

Vanessa isn’t a bitch. she’s an underpaid security guard that has her entire career on the line throughout the whole game. there’s a loose child in the Pizzaplex. she’s literally trying to do her damn job so she won’t get fired.

more than that, Vanessa is clearly under a severe amount of psychological stress. she’s being mind controlled by a serial child killer to murder people. you’re telling me you also wouldn’t be in a constant bad mood if that was your life?? and even if you don’t think Vanessa is Vanny, Vanessa STILL has mental health issues. that much is proven by the therapy tapes (i think it’s canon that she has depression and anxiety? and maybe PTSD? i can’t remember; it’s been awhile since i was hyperfixated on this game). god forbid a person, a woman no less, shows the negative aspects of their mental illness!

like, depression, anxiety, AND PTSD all cause irritability and anger issues. anxiety literally triggers your fight or flight, and not everyone automatically cowers into their flight instinct. PTSD has a little something called “hyperarousal,” which is a constant state of anger.

but okay, mental health issues can’t be used as an excuse for things, alright. it’s still late at night. people get irritable and cranky the more they stay up. lack of sleep causes aggression.

but really, none of that matters because Vanessa is justified in her grouchiness through the entire game since, again, she’s doing her job.

and it’s not even like she says or does anything that bad! i’ve seen people treat her like she’s some kind of monster, and for what? because she made a hollow threat about scrapping Freddy?? it was, like, two in the morning, people! people say things they don’t mean when they’re 1) tired and 2) emotional. and we all know she doesn’t have the authority to do that, so she wouldn’t actually go through with it.

also need i remind everyone that Vanessa is treated poorly by her OWN CREATOR?? she’s grossly sexualized. we all know what the Vanny suit looks like. it’s skintight. it’s very obviously designed in a way to highlight ALL her curves. Scott did that on purpose. and like,,, why?? she’s a murder bunny. why does she have to be “attractive”?

don’t get me wrong, i like the design for Vanny, i just hate the suit. i love the idea of her looking all patchwork, like Vanessa tore apart different articles of clothing to make the costume because she couldn’t get enough fur, so she could have been this big mess of thick white fur with splashes of a bunch of random materials in between the pelt. that could have easily shown how, like, “unpracticed” she is. it’s a shoddy suit made by someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing.

but NOOOO, Scott had to go, “how can i show that she’s a woman who has boobs?!?!??!? how can i bring her boobs into this?!?!?! what about her boobs?!?!?! we can’t forget about her boobs!!!!”

like, dude, we know she has boobs. she’s a killer bunny, not a playboy bunny. let’s not blur the lines, Scott.

you know, it’s really saying something when the plush of a character is less sexualized than the design itself. i own a Vanny plush (it look, like, three months for her to ship), and she looks great! she’s super cute! but, GOD, the DUALITY between her and the actual Vanny is GLARING.

but also, this isn’t anything new. most of Scott’s female characters get the treatment of being sexualized.

it’s just so goddamn frustrating to see male characters get held up on a higher pedestal than female characters. this is an issue in most fandoms. the women are treated like shit. and it’s infuriating.

just— if Vanessa were a guy, people would NOT treat her the way they do. and if she were a man, Vanny’s suit would have been less sexualized and more like an actual animal suit.

[bloodpen-to-paper]

Movie Review Blurbs: The Super Mario Bros. Movie

The Highlights

-The brothers were the most endearing part for me, they had a wonderful dynamic that not only made me like them as a duo, but as individuals (from the Mario media I know, there wasn't much focus on their personality so it was nice watching something that gave them more character)

-Jack Black got to sing his silly songs and honestly that's all that matters

-The movie making fun of the egregious Italian accents in the beginning was a good gag, especially considering the two are still Italian in the movie and are given more accurate accents (also I love that they're canonically from Brooklyn lmao)

-Mario was a fucking crack head before the isekai and I enjoy that fact very much

-Yoshi avengers end credit scene

-Surprisingly decent voice acting, they all delivered (especially Charlie Day and Jack Black)

-The penguins, the Dry Bones, SHY GUYS

-Toad is a fucking criminal apparently who helps outsiders break into the castle and goes outside the Mushroom Kingdom to do god knows what

-Off the top of my head, my favorite part of the movie was Luigi running from the Dry Bones and ending up in Luigi's Mansion; great horror scene for a very PG movie

-Whatever the fuck was going on between Kamek and Bowser

-SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS-

-Mario and DK's frienenemy relationship was great, especially with how they butt heads but also understand (daddy issues) and respect each other (they're a good ship ngl)

-I liked Cranky Kong as a character, I feel like he was a character made to appeal more to an older crowd now that I think about it

-The implications? Of Bowser's entire fucking ship coming to the human realm? And totaling the city? Magic is real? What's gonna happen there is the U.S. government gonna try and harness the power of the magic realm and capitalize on it like there is so much left unanswered

-simp bowser lmao (many dudebros were mad about this one which automatically makes it the best plotline in my book)

-Mario and Peach weren't shown to have romantic feelings for each other, giving them time to actually get to know each other first

Criticisms

-Ok so let's address the main issue; the pacing. The movie severely lacked transition, bridging and buildup, and it felt less like a movie and more like a bunch of individual scenes thrown together (cause it kinda was). It was frustrating cause the movie was genuinely very engaging, and there was some real lost potential with how rushed it was. It definitely needed to be longer; I think the people working on it were on a time constraint, and it showed

-Pigging-backing off the previous note, a lack of build up to big moments made those moments feel like they came out of nowhere. it also lacked an after math period for those big moments, which makes them feel unsubstantial

-Ok rant time: I saw people having this concern for Peach being a dull #girlboss character that lacked substance, and... yeah, it happened. I think the issue of female characters being sidelined and not given any character depth is being acknowledged, but in a way that still doesn't give them depth. Basically, male creators have realized they've been making female characters useless love interests in the background, so they're fixing this by making said characters hyper-competent, and in the forefront of the fight. However, its had this adverse effect where these hyper-competent characters are now just serving as plot devices to push the narrative rather than being given their own character narrative. They are at the forefront, and fight, but are still lacking in depth and development (what's worse is they still just serve as aides to male leads most of the time, just now in a repackaged way that usually would be held by a side male character). The Mario movie was rushed so none of the characters got much development, but Peach in particular was not given any character development, only plot development (she got isekai'd and is wondering where she's from, but we don't see how this idea effects her emotionally or drives her because... it really doesn't. She's just kinda like "oh hey I'm from another universe... ok cool! Anyway-"). So yeah, that needs work. Male creators need to humanize their female characters like they do the male ones, and actually give them flaws and struggles (Peach literally has a gag about being so perfect she mastered the super hard parkour course they practice on in one go, while we see Mario work on it and improve over time; its lazy ass writing cmon now). Hence why I like consuming media that's actually by female creators, and I encourage all of you to do the same

-Mario and DK were great but again needed more fleshing out, they had this whole bonding moment about their daddy issue but it happened so fast that you couldn't really stew in it much

-Mario/DK's daddy issues were not handled the best, they only got their father's approval when they did something cool and not for actually being themselves; didn't like the messaging there very much

-Though I mentioned Mario x Peach didn't happen, the movie still very intrusively pushes the idea in your face by having side characters comment on it; I imagine this is what homophobes think they're experiencing when queer character exist in media, except this movie didn't even try to be subtle with the push

-Why did Toad just decide to help Mario find Luigi? Why did Peach decide to train Mario so she could take him with her to Donkey Kong Island? Just cause he's a fellow human? And why did she just decide to take Toad along too? Again, pacing

-Rainbow Road being a "secret path" that was literally out in the open and Bowser found it almost immediately lmao (it was also never narratively explained how Bowser found the path if I'm remembering correctly)

-The Luma gag was overdone imo, but the "finally, mercy" part was very funny

-no bowuigi sex scene -∞/10

Final Thoughts

Overall, the movie was very fun, but the time constraint really did bring it down from being a better ranked movie. Its frustrating because the movie had so much to offer, I wanted more from it, and that's why the pacing is something I'm hammering on so much. And for anyone saying "its a kid's movie, who cares?"... sorry I want kid's to have good movies? And not just the kind of drool that comes from Minions-type productions? Movies are art, and art should have the people behind it putting the best into their work that they can, kid's movie or not, so if something is bringing down that art (a time constraint for example) it should be criticized in my opinion. Plus lets face it, a lot of the people going in to see the movie were teens/adults who grew up on Mario.

Despite all this though, I genuinely enjoyed it, and my low expectations for what is an Illumination movie were pleasantly subverted. There was clearly a lot of love put into this film, and I can't wait to see if there will be a sequel. Thanks for reading!

[yabagofmilfs]

📚 and 😭

📚 A fic you wish you could display on your bookshelf

oh, god. pretty much everything by sevenfists, but especially in xanadu and all the way through.

all of al-the-remix's mpreg series, because the spine would be well-worn and the pages dog-eared and probably open automatically to cranky bat geno, and if we were made of water, and the pre-dawn dance.

and because i'm already feeling nostalgic, another cascara-soda alter ego fic: civilian. holy fuck. i'll never be over it. incredibly beautiful.

😭 A fic that ripped your heart out (but it hurt so good)

i've said this before, but before falling into hrpf i very deliberately did not read anything that would make me sad. but the dynamics of sid and geno really lend themselves to some gut wrenching scenarios so now i have a list a mile long of fics that have hurt my feelings. some chosen at random (whatever catches my eye in my bookmarks):

both of the sevenfists fics mentioned above, plus motherland.

bow and arrow by oflights

still on that tightrope and blood from a stone by saysthemagpie (and also ATT which i've already mentioned in a previous ask. i guess everything they write hurts me, haha)

a drowning in california by beggingwolf (i almost did not finish this one because it was making my stomach hurt so bad [very glad i did though!])

in november by getoffmyhead (cw: abortion, sort of? he is a chicken, btw. if you even care.)

and just to round it out: honey and a sting by bropunzeling (girl!Leon/Matt)

[surplus-of-sarcasm]

Number 13

TW: Starvation, being held captive, hysterical breakdown, animal is killed

"120," Hero mutters softly as they scratch out the tally mark on the wall of their stone cell with nails that used to be perfectly manicured once upon a time.

120 days spent in this hellhole, with barely any air and far too much light which made sleeping nigh impossible along with the hard, stone floor. But nothing was as worse as the hunger and thirst that seemed to become the same feeling now. They desperately missed the rats their captors would throw to them at first. They'd drink them dry within five minutes, and it was quite possibly the worst flavour of blood they'd ever had. But it was better. Than the starvation that tore at their insides and made every movement feel like they were at war with their own limbs.

The door creaks open, and Hero sits upright, shoulders tensing in apprehension. Villain has the nerve to saunter in front of a hungry starving vampire, jugular vein casually exposed and posture completely relaxed.

"Wow. You look like crap."

They laugh softly. "I never knew that blood mattered that much to you. I remember clearly you used to squeeze blood transfusion bags into your glass and sip it up with a straw like a damn pina colada. You used to turn up your nose at the rats, hm?" An playful look crosses their face.

Their nemesis stalks closer to them, grinning, and Hero lets out a growl, low and feral. Villain's dragging something along with them.

Their eyes widen and their mouth waters at the sight of a plump-looking deer. Their normally green-blue eyes turn a bold red and their whole body is racked with shivers as they crawl on all fours towards their prey.

"Not so fast, sweetheart." They slowly, tauntingly even, pull the animal away from them. Hero's growl would've scared anyone in their right mind to death. Villain, bless them, knows sanity like a polar bear knows the Sahara desert. "Can't let you have this snack if you don't comply. All you need to do is talk."

Hero cusses them out. The filthiest thing they know. "I could get you to do anything for me in this state, no? Anything." They run their finger lightly on their enemy's jaw, narrowly avoiding getting it chopped off by their sharp teeth.

Hero's eyes fill with tears. They know what will happen. They're going to humiliate them. Their 'composure' is gone as they fall into straight up hysterics. Villain's expression goes from amused to shocked.

They were just messing with them, thinking Hero would just be cranky and that the predatory stance had been a little show to scare them. But this was cruel, even for a villain. They crouch down to floor, expression softening. "Hero, I swear this isn't up to me. Supervillain's going to make this so much worse for you if you don't comply. Please, if you just listen, I'll have you out of here. You'll finally get some sleep, clean clothes, no limit on the fancy little glasses of blood you like. It'll be somewhere nice. Just. . ."

They're cut off by Hero screaming in agony, banging on the floor till their already bruised knuckles turn a deeper shade of purple. Villain curses and they push the deer towards them. To hell with protocol. To hell with Supervillain and their twisted little games.

Almost automatically, Hero runs their fingers somewhat soothingly on the animal's skin, and it stops struggling completely. They swiftly twist its neck with a sharp crack and sink their fangs into it. Their whole body relaxes against the animal as they continue to drain it. They stop momentarily to catch their breath and resume, until they drink their prey dry.

They lick their lips and lean against the wall of their cell, and Villain hands them a couple tissues from their pockets, eyes still wide at what they've just witnessed. Wiping their hands and mouth, their eyes change back to their familiar bluish green. A slight smile plays on Hero's no-longer-dry lips.

"Thank you," they whisper curtly.

"You-you're welcome." They flash the immortal a weak smile. They have no idea what they're going to do, the threat of Supervillain's wrath rearing its ugly head at them. But they don't regret at all letting Hero feed.

No one deserves to be treated like that.

[thatscarletflycatcher]

I recently saw a post about different styles of posting on social media about one's engagement, coming right after I finished a conversation with some friends about weddings, and it struck me once again, the slow loss of our privacy coupled with a progressive increase on our personal isolation, and how that is, hm, bad.

I'm gonna try to explain. Back when my parents married (Uruguay, early 1980s) a wedding was an important event because marriage was a socially relevant thing. Not telling someone you were getting married was seen as extremely rude; it was set custom to make two sets of wedding invitations: one, including the information about the reception, for the people you were inviting to the party, and another with just the date, time and place of the ceremony, ending in "the bride and bridegroom will greet you at [insert the entrance to the location where the wedding was to be performed]" that you sent to acquaintances and pinned to a corkboard at your workplace/social club/dance studio/whatever. Basically everyone was notified and invited to attend the ceremony and bring a gift if they were so inclined, or not, at will.

A decade ago people would catch wind of your engagement because you changed your relationship status on facebook. The more daring would post a picture with some text. Fine. Nowadays you catch wind that someone is engaged or married by being bombarded on instagram by pictures of the proposal, wedding, reception and honeymoon, for which you were never even given a short "hey, I'm getting married!!!" text.

Expectations for wedding receptions are sky high. You need to show off the wealth that you most likely don't have, and everything that gets the wedding label automatically becomes 10x more expensive. So people, reasonably, invite less and less guests to their weddings. Some schew the whole social event altogether and elope or get secretly and quietly married.* And yet most of the time you are still getting the unsolicited picture album. And maybe some people think that the picture assault is notification enough. But that's also something I positively dislike. Telling someone you are getting married, a proper communication, is not the same thing as just posting pictures. One is personal, the other is impersonal.

In other words, what used to be more private and personal (the pictures and video of the event, what you shared with close relatives and friends) is now broadcasted, and what used to be the thing you broadcasted (a communication to everyone of your new relationship status and establishing of a new family) is now rather private. There's a dissonance by which less and less people get to participate in a wedding, but more and more people are made to watch it from outside as complete strangers. It's mildly voyeuristic, and from and for a lot of people, a sort of "rubbing in their faces", a fundamentally adversarial attitude.

*mind you, my parents had a wedding reception consisting on "sandwiches, cake and soda" at grandma's house, where people took turns to sit and where dishes and cutlery came from several different borrowings to make up the number, and if there was whiskey that was because one of the guests brought a bottle. But that's hardly an instagrammable reception these days, says I like a cranky 80 year old.

[gregorygerwitz]

i am IN LOVE with the new cozy trio hospital au its perfect !!!!!! (does it have a nickname?)

if you have more hcs or ideas to share from this universe please please do i absolutely want to hear them !! (no pressure though ofc)

⚡

[ AU moodboards ]

warnings for the moodboard post and below headcanons: drug use, addiction, depression, attempted suicide, abuse, hospital stays

The 2011 AU my beloved! Honestly, I did the math and realized Hailey was ~19 (by my birthday headcanons) when Jay was with Mouse in the hospital for his (also my headcanon) overdose in November of 2011. And for about... two weeks? This AU is one of the only things I've thought about. I have so many thoughts.

(and the only things I've been calling it are "the new cozy trio au" and "the 2011 au" it doesn't have an official tag or anything yet)

Hailey, who is still a teenager shows up to lunch that first day and Mouse's immediate reaction is to ask Jay why there's an infant in their booth (in his defense, he's still going through the worst of withdrawals and he's cranky, and he wasn't expecting a third person at lunch)

it wasn't Jay's plan to play host for more than a couple weeks - he wanted to give Mouse a comfortable place to get and stay clean, and he wanted to offer Hailey a warm, safe place to sleep until she can get her feet under her

then it's been three months and it doesn't look like that's changing any time soon, so they pool their money to get a bigger place, if only so Hailey doesn't have to keep sleeping on the couch

and, yeah, it's in a less great part of town, and it definitely feels as cheap as it is, but Jay's the only one between the three of them who has a steady income while Mouse and Hailey have minimum wage jobs without guaranteed hours, so they'll take what they can get while they try to save money

Hailey applies to the police academy the year she turns 21, both because she still remembers Trudy from her childhood and Jay is so excited about just moving up to Intelligence and she wants to be excited with him, to some extent

Mouse stays clean and sober after 2011, for the most part. there's relapses, and bouts of unemployment, and months where he misses his cut of the rent, but he has two roommates to catch him when he stumbles and offer the support he needs when he's struggling

of course, Jay helps him get into a rehab facility when he decides he wants to try the professional route of getting clean again, and helps him get the job with Intelligence once he's living in the apartment full time again

no one reenlists in this AU because as much as I love the parallels in canon the idea of splitting up the cozy trio when they're happy and stable makes me sad 💜

yes, everyone is tired of the trio agreeing each other and forming an automatic alliance during every case and disagreement, but there's nothing they can do to stop it

Voight tried to put his No Relationships Within The Unit rule into place but like... it's really hard to control them when they all live together and spend every minute away from work together? like he can try to enforce it but that's not gonna change the fact that their home has a huge bed that they all fit in and can lay around in every weekend to watch movies

it's just a lot of domestic chaos that comes from one shared traumatic week and the healing that comes after that, filled with a lot of unconditional emotional support

(bonus two of the three panicking and being protective of the other any time one of them is in danger, which, as in canon, is practically constantly)

[carpisuns]

For the artist meme -- 20 and 6! 🎨 if you like xx

20. how often do you get art block?

all the time 🥰 it's like clockwork lol sometimes i get sooo frustrated and cranky bc i hate all my art and i'm like "woe is me!! i've lost all my skills!! i'll never draw again!!" and then i'm like wait . i know what's happening here. i just gotta wait it out I'll be fine lol. it's nice that i also write bc then i can switch to writing for a while until the art block clears up 👍 i've found it's best for me to just take a break from drawing for a bit and not try to force it so my brain can like reset itself

6. tag your favorite artists/inspirations!

oh man there are so many!!!! i could name like 100 people lol but i'm gonna limit myself to the ones i think have had the most direct influence on my art style. hope u guys don't mind the tags<3

@ileniagennari was one of the first artists i latched onto stylewise. i used to study their work a lot because i am obsessed with the fluidity and softness of their linework and i just really like how they draw faces and bodies. their rendering is also amazing and feels sort of cinematic somehow? i've always wished my art could have a similar feel!

@anna-scribbles has also been a huge style influence for me and she's just also been a big inspiration in general as a close friend<3 i ADORE her work and have studied it specifically a ton. she draws the most blorby blorbos ever. blorbyness is her art trademark imo. and i want that for me too so i tried to steal it. i also think just sheer proximity to her and her art has made me pick up a lot of things from her automatically haha. in particular, i feel like the way she draws smiles is so perfect, and i always try to channel her when i draw smiles myself haha

@ladybeug inspires me so much and has taught me really valuable art skills! a while ago i came to a point in my art journey when i felt just really stuck and frustrated. like i could not for the life of me just DOODLE. i took everything too seriously, even if it was supposed to be simple and silly. i really needed to learn how to loosen up and enjoy drawing more. stephanie is like the most esteemed and delightful doodler i know so i came to her for advice and she DELIVERED. she gave me super helpful tips and invited me to make daily comics with her and it's been lifechanging! it's helped me focus on communication over perfection and feel more confident in my art, which i think had a visible difference in my style too. i learn SO much from just regularly enjoying stephanie's work, including her webcomic @datmcomic!!

@rileyclaw is a good buddy of mine and his work is so hugely inspiring to me! it's really educational to see his wips and learn from his process. and since he's an incredible animator as well as an illustrator, enjoying his work is part of what inspired me to finally take a leap and make my first animatic. i really love how he pushes/exaggerates body and facial expression to communicate emotion and how he makes such careful choices about comp and color and just Everything to tell a whole story with every piece of his art. i've learned a lot from riley on the storytelling aspects of art and that's something i continue to try to build on!

@knockknockknockingonhootysdoor's art is like an instant and intense shot of dopamine to my brain every time!!! i cant even tell you how HAPPY it makes me. i just stare at it and eat it all up and i'm always asking myself HOW does he do it?? how does he make me feel this way. and i think it's just like....how genuine it is?? i can just feel kryan's love for the story and characters in the way he draws and im not sure that is a stealable quality lol. but in particular something i really admire about his art is how SHAPE it is. i love how he builds each character with different shapes and how each design feels so unique and so fitting for them. i am trying to incorporate that more into my own art!

man i already have rambled so much and there are so many other artists i could go on and on about alskjdfjkla ok just real quick i have to shout out @picayunearts bc i intensely enjoy her work in both the ml and toh fandoms and her coloring and use of light and gradient always stands out to me so i kinda try to channel that sometimes! @smallpapers is another fav and i love how soft and simple her art feels! it's always inspiring to me. @raystel's work also inspires me a lot, whether it's fanwork or original stuff. she is so creative with character design and seeing the way she expresses her ideas in art is so cool!

and i would be remiss if i didn't shout out my sister @mozzys-studio who is the first person i came to when i wanted to learn how to draw and she taught me a lot! her art is beautiful<3

thanks for the questions! :D

artist asks

[papirouge]

What jpop artists do you like? Lately ive been getting into some like perfume, and sheena ringo or even vintage ones like pink lady or candies. Ive also heard lots of good things about hikada utaru, but aparently she identifies as nonbinary now?! Does it make me petty not to want to listen to her just because of that? Like i expected better of Japan artists but i guess even they can be delulu like american artists...

Yeah, there's been a whole discourse with Hikaru Utada because she suddenly said she didn't want to be described with gendered pronouns such as "Ms." before her name (and instead use Mx. or something like that). It's interesting to note that Hikki is fluent in English, and there was hardly any chance that someone who only speaks Japanese get so nitpicky about pronouns. 'Ms' doesn't really exist in Japanese, and actually Japanese is a pretty non gendered language (even less than English). So it's really interesting how the linguistic influence of the West took a toll of her. This statement was clearly dedicated to her Western audience, the only that would consistently use pronouns to describe her. However, she never stated she wanted to he called "she/they/them" or whatever.

Music wise, I'm not really fond of her music. I really like her 'ULTRA BLUE' album (which is famous for "Passion" which was Kingdom Hearts 2 theme) and some songs here and there though. Hikki is famous for having Jpop most groundbreaking debut at only 16 years old with "Automatic" (this song aged like fine wine tbh) by 1)being one of the biggest selling record in Japan 2)shoving R&B element in her music which was very outstanding at that time. The fact that she wrote at such a young age (and still do) all her lyrics + is fluent in English gave her a very solid 'ace' aura, and die hard fans who still to this day will jump on your throat if you 'dare' criticize their queen lol I remember someone who said that even her most upbeat/positive songs (Keep tryin', COLORS, Traveling…) always had a sad & melancholic era, and I think that's the most accurate description of her music, maybe that's why I have a hard time listening to her albums bc they (beside 'ULTRA BLUE' and 'HEART STATION' which are imo her most lighthearted ones) have this very downer, softdoom vibe~

That being said, it would be ridiculous to not listen to her just bc she has pronouns anon lol It's pretty funny how some people are getting so cranky abt pronouns-having artists and boast about how refuse to entertain anything that they do....but will have issue to keep watching/listening to movies/music of predators, sex pest and convicted rapists lmao

I always got a weird vibe from Sheena Ringo and never got remotely interested in her music. The rumors about she being a closeted Japanese nationalist just bc of her NIPPON album era (where she had her audience wave Japanese imperial flags) are insane though lmao Hopefully those people have the same energy to call out Miley Cyrus for being an American Nationalist for her song "Party in the USA" where she dances before a giant American flag 🤡

I hardly listen to new Japanese artists anymore. I replied to an ask not too long ago where I professed my love for Ayumi Hamasaki (her 10 first year of career were pristine - she really should've retired at her 10 years Complete Singles best album momentum because everything after that has pretty much been trash tbh). Her album LOVEppears is probably my favorite album of all time 🥴

I'll never be over how cute she looks on "Fly High" MV (one of my favorite of her - those platform shoes + micro short + glittery sweatshirt combo will never get old / this MV is 23 years old and that outfit is still KICKIN #legendary)

Also pretty random because that's not a band that I'm checking like that, but THE ORAL CIGARETTES 'UNOFFICIAL' album is an absolute no skip banger. I hardly remember a Jrock album that got me hooked like that those last few years😳

I have so many other Japanese acts that I love it's really insane (I am more savvy of Japanese music that western one).

Soloist wise, I grew up in womanhood listening to Kana Nishino and her music is literally the soundtrack of my early 20s. We were born only a month apart and felt so connected to her and her songs. She truly has a special place in my heart. Her debut & sophomore albums 'LOVE one.' and 'to LOVE' got 20 years old me on a CHOKEHOLD! "Motto" got me crying all my tears off a dusty lmaoooo😭 it's insane how her songs matched with my life - we truly had a connection

Tomiko Van and Kana Nishino are Jpop best vocalists imo ELLEGARDEN (rip) and ART-SCHOOL are my favorite bands of all time. ASIAN KUNG FU GENERATION and UVERworld had a decent run in the 2000s. Perfume is still kicking.....but I don't really catch up with them anymore cause I've been trying to cut out secular music off my playlist

[angelbluediary]

What a day.

After my shower, I was standing in the kitchen for just a few minutes talking to my mama. My hair was down and I was curling the ends in my hands to catch the droplets. We had a good conversation. I felt closer to my mom than I have in a long time, and she was making a big dinner for the first time in years, and everything seemed so much closer to my childhood.

A while later, back in my shared bedroom, I heard a commotion outside. My mom had fallen. It was scary seeing her like that, sprawled out facedown on the floor and not moving. I got to her around the same time my dad did, and he was in the middle of a (timed?) test for his new job and was acting so… oddly chill about the whole thing. I was freaked out but also was doing all I could to suppress a bout of hysterical, inappropriate giggles that wanted to burst through every moment I stood there taking it all in. Even after I realized she had slipped on water on the kitchen floor—water that had dripped from my hair—and broke her toe.

I didn’t even think she broke her toe at first, though she said so herself. My dad was acting so much calmer than I would have imagined he’d act finding his wife like that, and in pain. At first I thought maybe she was being dramatic, which is awful, because my mom definitely broke her toe and was a fucking trooper about it.

She didn’t want to get off the floor so my dad went back to his test. Mason came out of the bathroom and we kept my mom company in the kitchen while we finished the meal she started. And she kept reassuring us and joking. We were all laughing together while she was still reeling from the pain. She keeps telling me not to feel guilty and it wasn’t my fault.

All she wanted was some ice for her toe and wine, lots of wine. She never shed a single tear. Just kept on talking like a sitcom character. Joking about how this was supposed to be a better month and look where we are on the first day of August. Getting distracted and scolding us for letting her chicken burn just a little bit.

My dad was cranky afterwards for a long while. Sat in his chair even after his test was done while Mason and I got her the things she wanted and finished the meal. I don’t know what exactly was going through his head unless he felt embarrassed in some way for not being the one to do everything for her. For having to prioritize something above family for once, because that’s not who he is—and that’s why his reaction threw me off so bad.

They were joking and laughing together just now when I went to kiss my mama goodnight so I think they just needed time alone. I still feel so bad. All this over my wet hair hanging loose when I usually put it up right away automatically. But along with feeling a strong, renewed sense of gratitude for Mason being in my life, I saw my mom in a way I really needed to. Knowing someone is strong and witnessing it firsthand are two very different things. I was and am utterly in awe of her. I realize some of the things I love the most about myself, that only come out when I’m at my absolute greatest performance, are inherited straight from her. But nobody does it like her.

It’s terrible how it came about, but today I remembered how fiercely I love and admire my mom, and I don’t want to lose sight of that feeling anytime soon.