#while seeing all 'the evidence' and even enjoying some - just not in romantic/sexual way

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hi! Really enjoyed the Harry is gay post, very well researched! Are there any other characters in the series you would also think are gay? Don't wanna say anyone just yet, just want your unfiltered opinion

Hi!

Thank you so much!

Can't say I have other characters I feel as strongly about their sexual preferences. A large part of it is what Harry chooses to pay attention to. So, I don't have much evidence for anyone else, but I can say who I think is likelier to be gay (or at least not straight) from textual evidence. Some of them go into headcanon territory, but here they are, off the top of my head and in no particular order:

1. Dumbledore and Grindelwald

I'm pretty sure these two are canon, so I don't need to say much. But:

“Yes, even after they’d spent all day in discussion—both such brilliant young boys, they got on like a cauldron on fire—I’d sometimes hear an owl tapping at Gellert’s bedroom window, delivering a letter from Albus! An idea would have struck him, and then he had to let Gellert know immediately!”

(DH, pages 308-309)

Gellert— .... (This was your mistake at Durmstrang! But I do not complain, because if you had not been expelled, we would never have met.) Albus

(DH, pages 309)

“Grindelwald. And at last, my brother had an equal to talk to someone just as bright and talented he was. And looking after Ariana took a backseat then, while they were hatching all their plans for a new Wizarding order and looking for Hallows, and whatever else it was they were so interested in.

(DH, pages 480)

2. Sirius Black

I think Sirius might've been gay, or at least bi. It goes into headcanon territory, but I think Sirius used to be in love with James. He just always gave me that vibe. (I don't think they were ever a thing, I think Sirius took his feelings for James with him to his grave).

Here are some quotes that gave me the feeling Sirius is not interested in anyone but James:

Harry saw Sirius give James the thumbs-up. Sirius was lounging in his chair at his ease, tilting it back on two legs. He was very good-looking; his dark hair fell into his eyes with a sort of casual elegance neither James’s nor Harry’s could ever have achieved, and a girl sitting behind him was eyeing him hopefully, though he didn’t seem to have noticed.

(OOTP, page 642)

“He kept messing up his hair,” said Harry in a pained voice. Sirius and Lupin laughed. “I’d forgotten he used to do that,” said Sirius affectionately.

(OOTP, page 670)

Plus, Sirius' general fixation on James and his constant reminiscence about him. And the two-way mirror they made just for them cause they couldn't handle an hour apart in detention:

This is a two-way mirror. I’ve got the other. If you need to speak to me, just say my name into it; you’ll appear in my mirror and I’ll be able to talk in yours. James and I used to use them when we were in separate detentions.

(OOTP, page 858)

But we don't really know about any romantic interests Sirius may have had. So, it's more of a headcanon than anything.

3. Dean Thomas

I think Dean Thomas is bi (not gay, I think he did like Ginny). And I have only one qoute evidence for it, but it's a really funny one and I don't think I've seen anyone mention it so I'll put it here:

He certainly wasn’t the only one who was sorry to see Professor Lupin go. The whole of Harry’s Defense Against the Dark Arts class was miserable about his resignation. “Wonder what they’ll give us next year?” said Seamus Finnigan gloomily. “Maybe a vampire,” suggested Dean Thomas hopefully.

(POA, page 429)

Dean Thomas clearly read whatever 1990s version of Twilight that exists in the HP universe and wants a love triangle paranormal romance with a werewolf and a vampire.

4. Draco Malfoy

I think he was a little too obsessed with Harry. Like, I don't actually ship Drarry, but I can definitely confess Draco was way too interested in Harry for it to not appear a little gay.

He rummaged in his trunk up in the luggage rack and pulled out the miniature figure of Viktor Krum. “Oh wow,” said Neville enviously as Ron tipped Krum onto his pudgy hand. “We saw him right up close, as well,” said Ron. “We were in the Top Box —” “For the first and last time in your life, Weasley.” Draco Malfoy had appeared in the doorway. Behind him stood Crabbe and Goyle, his enormous, thuggish cronies, both of whom appeared to have grown at least a foot during the summer. Evidently they had overheard the conversation through the compartment door, which Dean and Seamus had left ajar. “Don’t remember asking you to join us, Malfoy,” said Harry coolly.

(GOF, page 168)

Draco literally comes to find Harry on the train, uninvited, every year (except 6th). Throughout their time at school, he also makes an active effort to seek out Harry to a level that is kind of ridiculous. It always looked to me like Draco was desperate for any sort of attention from Harry.

Harry looked down at the hawthorn wand that had once belonged to Draco Malfoy. He had been surprised, but pleased to discover that it worked for him at least as well as Hermione’s had done.

(DH, page 444)

Considering how loyal unicorn hair wands like Draco's are, it seems Dravo feels more friendly about Harry than he likes to pretend.

5. Aunt Muriel

It sounds weird, I know, but I have a reason here. So, Muriel is from the same generation as Dumbledore, more or less, from her words in DH. And we know, back then she had expectations to marry and have children as a (seemingly) pure-blood witch. Those expectations would've been prevalent when she was a young woman in the early 20th century, even among the less blood-purist families.

The fact that she didn't seem to have settled down with a husband and children implies she wasn't interested in doing so. This allows a reading of her as either interested in women or not interested in sex or marriage in general.

6. Alphard Black & Cassiopeia Black

For the same reasons as Muriel. Neither Cassiopeia (born 1915) nor Alphard, Sirius' godfather (born circa 1927-ish) married or had children. This is something that would be expected of them, so the reading of them as not straight is very plausible.

So, that's it. These are all the characters that off the top of my head I could give textual evidence for a not straight reading of. I don't have as much evidence, and that's why I consider this more headcanon than theory. Obviously, people can headcanon wherever, these are just the ones that I could recall evidence for.

[ze-ppe-li]

hi there dear bestfriend 😌 i love your writing skills like really 🤭🤭 can you write about the fem reader who is a college student and want to be a doctor but she so broke and poor so like she was let's have sugermomy (irene .red velvet) and like when they met for the first time the reader was shocked because irene is so short and same for irene because she didn't expect the reader to be so tall

(top fem reader x bottom irene) +18

sorry English is not my first language

...🇪​🇳​🇬​🇱​🇮​🇸​🇭​ 🇮​🇸​🇳​·🇹​ 🇲​🇾​ 🇫​🇮​🇷​🇸​🇹​ 🇱​🇦​🇳​🇬​🇺​🇦​🇬​🇪​ 🇦​🇳​🇾​🇼​🇦​🇾​

ᴬᵘᵗʰᵒʳ'ˢ ᶰᵒᵗᵉ: Wʀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴀs ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴅɪғғɪᴄᴜʟᴛ﹐ sɪɴᴄᴇ I ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇ Iʀᴇɴᴇ ᴀs ᴀ ʜᴀʀᴅ ᴛᴏᴘ. Iɴ ᴅᴇғᴇɴsᴇ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴᴏɴ﹐ ᴍʏ ʀᴜʟᴇs ʜᴀᴅɴ·ᴛ ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴘᴏsᴛᴇᴅ ʏᴇᴛ﹐ sᴏ ʜᴇʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏ﹗

Bottom Irene, Sugarmommy Irene, oral (both), brief facesitting (r. receiving), fingering (i. receiving) brief size kink.

Life was easier when you were still in high school. All you had to do was go to class, take notes, attend meetings, and study. Then come graduation, it all changed. You’d graduated high school with top honors, and everyone expected that you would pursue a scholarship to study. That would be your perfect life, of course, but... it didn't happen.

Now, you were in a situation where you could barely pay your pension.

And the strict social rules and pressure on students in South Korea didn't help at all.

The most exhaustive thing about the case is that the career that you had carefully chosen lasted a long time, it wouldn't be long in which it would be difficult for you to pay for it, unless you went into debt, it's a possibility, but it will put you under more pressure, right?

That was until you decided to take a break and go to one of Red Velvet's concerts. You thought that, this time, it would be your last time that you would spend something moderately expensive during these last years.

After the concert, perhaps because fate really smiled on you, you ended up meeting the group's leader in person: Joohyun.

She was, in fact, what attracted you in her, and led you to talk to her.

It was not difficult to talk to her. She seemed to enjoy listening to you, as much as you enjoyed talking.

The height difference between you was also noticeable, in the music videos in which she appeared, she didn't look so short.

Somehow, you ended up telling her about your current situation, hoping that at least she would give you some cursory advice.

But instead, she got serious and asked you to see her the next day on a small place of Wangsimni-ro, near SM Entertainment Building Headquarter.

You hesitated, but it seemed that she was waiting for your answer, or at least she made you feel that way. So you agreed.

On the next day, she told you that, while she couldn't offer you a job, she could give you a chance to give you some money, in exchange for staying with her... keeping her company both romantically and... carnally. It is a secret that would be kept between you two, clearly.

But you did not hesitate any longer: it was too good an opportunity. And besides, she was hot.

The next day, you visited her place and stayed with her until early evening, while you did several errands, buying food, paying bills, etc.

Before going back home, you kissed each other goodnight and she promised you that, after you finish your studies, you'll return to her place.

The next day, you returned to visit her again, doing your usual things, before she surprised you by saying that, if you wanted, you could stay there for the rest of the week.

Of course, you immediately said yes. So the days passed, some of them had sexual encounters, where she evidently dominated you, until she left you completely overstimulated, it was her way of letting you know how much she appreciated you.

Until for a while, the two of you couldn't see each other often due to her busy schedule, so you just hung around her house, waiting for her to arrive, it didn't matter if she arrived in the early morning.

It also didn't help that, even texting, she seemed to have no time for you at times, simply replying with a cold "I'm busy.", this made you start to believe that she had already lost interest in you, or her company had discovered your secret.

It wasn't when one weekend, you were in her apartment watching TV in her bed, when she came over. She looked quite tired, probably from the hard training she went through lately.

But even tired, she managed to get into bed with you and start to play with you. This excited you a lot, as she pressed against you, making you incredibly horny.

You started playing with her breasts while you were fondling her lips. Since she was tired, you thought this was the perfect time to switch roles, at least for once. Surprisingly, she let you do that, since she was incredibly tired at the time, but still, she really wanted you.

See her small body below yours, while her tongue played inside you, lapping at your clit, the only sounds that you heard was her breathing.

So, being satisfied, you grabbed her shoulders and threw her onto her back, where you proceeded to insert your fingers into her pussy, which felt very wet. You loved how hot she felt, you pulled out your fingers and plunged your tongue deep inside her. She moaned softly.

Your face became covered in her juices, which tasted absolutely delicious. The taste of her aroused you so much that you didn't care that she came all over your face.

After that, you fell asleep together, wrapped in each others arms. You woke up feeling incredibly happy.

And so it happened, every weekend, you were together with her. Every single weekend. Her words turned you on so much that you'd lose your mind sometimes.

A few years passed and you were able to complete your degree, no one would have thought that you could have achieved that because of Joohyun, who financed you from the beginning that you met, even with the money she gave you, you could buy all kinds of luxuries and clothing.

At first, you thought it was weird, thinking that maybe she was looking for someone to fuck. But soon enough, you accepted it. Besides, you liked spending time with her, it was actually fun. Sometimes, after getting home from work, you would find her ironing your clothes or making your bed, neither of us could help it, it wasn't serious at all, but, the fact that you spent time together always made you happy.

[creedslove]

HEARTLESS 💔 - PART ELEVEN

Agent Whiskey (Jack Daniels) x f!reader

Summary: You try to figure out your feelings for Jack and realize it's not a smart move to do so while drunk and flirting with him, when he thinks things are improving, he gets a harsh evidence things aren't just as easy as he thought

(this is the eleventh chapter of the HEARTLESS 💔 series)

• PART ONE TO TEN ON MY MASTERLIST

Warnings: fluff, sexual tension, more fluff because Wyatt is the sweetest kid in the world, bitchy mother-in-law, angst, sad!jack, mom!reader

A/N: Hi besties, I know it's been a while since we've seen our cowboy, and well, I hope you enjoy it!!! I know I did because I can't resist this mf, he's just perfect even if he's a broken sad cowboy 😭🤠

4k words

Jack's heart was beating probably too fast in his chest, it hammered against his rib cage but he didn't care. He was feeling like a million bucks, as he was finally getting some crumbles of your love. Nothing more than crumbles, but it was already enough for him, better than suffering with your despise and indifference. In a short span of minutes you two had almost kissed - if it weren't for his former mother-in-law, and you had also referred to Wyatt as your son. Your as in him and yours, and that couldn't make him happier at that moment, it might have seemed something small, but it made the difference in that cowboy's old broken heart, it was like the walls you built were falling down and that he could approach you, even if it wasn't in a romantic way, he still felt satisfied to be around you as friends, at least he could talk to you without having to break the ice all the time, he touch you - small hugs, occasional hand holding - and though he yearned for more, it was the best he would get after everything he'd done, so it was good, he'd rather torture himself by having his family close without actually being able to claim them as his, than suffer completely alone like he'd done for the past years.

He smiled at you, seeing how your cheeks were flushed because of the alcohol and patted his pocket finally finding the car keys and handing them to you 

"Go ahead sugar, you're less drunk than I am, you should be driving" he winked at you and chuckled as you widened your eyes the moment you grabbed the Bronco keys. Ever since you first started dating Jack, you dreamed of driving his Bronco, but as the cocky asshole he often was, he never let you - or anyone else really - drive his car. There were some things Jack was just so territorial and wouldn't let anyone to lie their hands on, and well, you were also one of those things once. Jack was possessive of you, he liked showing people you were his and just his, the way he would hold you, kiss you and make everyone else see who you belonged to. 

And in your drunken state as you two exited the bar, you kinda wished Jack would do it again. Just a few minutes ago you were about to kiss each other and now he watched you, and you watched him back, staring into his eyes, getting lost in them, and taking a real look at your Jack���. He was so handsome, his beautiful side profile was enough to make you weak at the knees, his sharp jawline always so smooth as he kept his beard shaved and his mustache trimmed. Any other man would look stupid with Jack's looks, but your cowboy… he was something else. 

"What?" He asked you, grinning with that devilish smile as you wouldn't stop staring 

"I-" you began to talk but you had a better idea - well, not really a better idea, rather a drunk idea - and took the hat off his head, chuckling at how cute his messy hair looked and put it on your head. 

Jack was shocked for a split second. Were you flirting with him? 

"Did you forget about the cowboy hat rule, sugar?" He raised his eyebrow at you and before you could answer, you tripped and nearly fell, but Jack immediately wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you closer to him. Maybe you weren't less drunk than he was after all, so it was safer if you two just got a cab to your mom's.

Leaving the bar and waiting for a cab on the sidewalk wasn't the greatest idea either, the wind was howling and you were shivering, and both you and Jack knew that if it weren't for Wyatt, the wisest option would be getting a fancy hotel room and spending the night. 

If you hadn't drunk as much as you did that night, you would be probably censoring yourself for having those shameless thoughts about him, giggling at the shit he said, pretending you didn't notice you were still clinging to him even after you got your balance back, after all, you were wearing his hat, for crying out loud! He was the same man who didn't accept your pregnancy, that kicked you out of your home and abandoned you to raise your baby alone, and once he came back, he just brought chaos back into your life, for several times he'd hurt you, told you cruel things and even threatened to take your son away from you. It was so wrong to behave like that, and a part of your brain kept repeating that over and over, while the other part seemed to only listen to your heart, taking you back to your sweetest and hottest memories you had shared at that same bar and in those hotel rooms.It would be easier if you could just blame it on the booze, as if having a few too many changed everything about your personality and made you forget about all the pain Jack caused you. But at the same time, it felt like you were in the presence of your Jack, the cowboy you loved, the one that was so sweet, flirty and gentle with you. The man that was a little cocky at first but he also made you feel like the only girl in the world, the one who would ravish you in bed and make your legs shake but would also hold you and cuddle you until you fell asleep. You two had an awkward encounter at first, you went on a date with your new boyfriend and Jack was waiting for his own date, you'd been so jealous of him and if you wondered if he'd been jealous of you, now you were sure of it, and that made you feel pretty good about yourself. 

Perhaps it was the way Jack was humiliated by the girl he was supposed to have a date with, the one that revealed herself to be another agent and nothing more, or maybe how he was so honest about the disaster he called his last mission and how things escalated from a fun, drunk conversation, into a confession of dark thoughts Jack didn't have the courage to share with anyone, not even his therapist. All that helped you to see your sweet old cowboy in those man's cold eyes, and when you stared into them, you realized they weren't cold anymore, they were warm and soft and that was when you were sure your Jack was back. 

ou were just so tired of restricting yourself all the time, you were also tired of people restricting you as well, always talking about how bad Jack Daniels was and how you shouldn't let him in. It was your mom, your friends, even Frankie had told you Jack was a dick, and though you knew they were all correct, you felt tired of being reminded of that the entire time, at least your own thoughts were private and in them you could allow yourself to surrender completely to your cowboy, because God knew that if he tried to make any move on you, you'd let him. 

Instead, you felt when his suit jacket was placed over your shoulders and he smiled down at you "don't want you to freeze, sugar" he winked as now you were wearing his jacket, his hat and you kept your arm wrapped tight around his waist, and you felt lucky that despite everything, Jack was still a gentleman, because any other guy would have interpreted all those signs wrong - actually correct, because you did want it - but he knew you'd had too much alcohol for that, even if he knew that once you sobered up he would've missed his chance of having you again. 

He opened the door so you would get in the cab and immediately joined you, giving your mother's address to the driver. You smiled and decided you wouldn't fight your urges, not that night, feeling safe knowing Jack would respect your boundaries and you wouldn't do anything that would hurt your boyfriend - that's what you told yourself at least - and as soon as Jack sat next to you, you wrapped your arm around him and rested against his chest. You were aware of how ridiculous you probably looked, a cowboy hat, a jacket that was way too big for you, and snuggling the man you swore you hated just a day before. Jack was caught by surprise, but smiled softly as he wrapped his arm around your body, stroking your back up and down. 

"Sugar, I was thinking about our little boy's birthday, and I would like to throw him a party on our ranch" he cleared his throat "well, my ranch, but it's gonna be yours too one day, you know, when I-" 

"Don't say that Jack" you asked him, looking into his eyes, "please… I have something to ask you" you bit your lips 

"Anything you want, sugar" 

"Don't kill yourself on another mission, Jack, please. You have our son, and our son needs his daddy too" 

Jack's heart melted at your lovely words, he'd longed to be accepted into the family just like that and now it was finally happening. 

"I won't, sugar… I got our family to take care of, even if you don't want me, you're still my responsibility and I'll make sure you're safe" his hand went for your face caressing your soft skin so gently, appreciating how it felt under his rough fingertips, you closed your eyes, leaning towards his touch and gently placing your lips on his chin, as you spread a trail of soft kisses all over his jawline before getting to his lips. Jack's breath got caught in his chest, his body overflowing with love as his hands squeezed you tighter against him, getting ready to deepen the kiss when the driver suddenly pulled up the car. 

"We're here" the man announced which quickly snapped the two of you out of the haze you were both deep into. 

You cleared your throat and blushed and Jack licked his lips, getting his wallet and paying for the ride. 

He helped out of the car and kept his hand on the small of your back, escorting you, like the southern gentleman he was. You two entered the building and took the elevator and suddenly you could see Jack tensing up. It was no secret your mom hated him, from the very beginning, even before things went to shit between the two of you. There was something she just couldn't stand about him, maybe the fact he was older, or that he'd been married before, or his manners - despite the fact Jack was a polite man, she still didn't think it was enough. She couldn't stand him and he reciprocated the feeling. During his first marriage, he could never understand all those mother-in-law jokes and why people often said they were as bad as they often did. His first wife's mom was a delight, a sweet woman who treated Jack like a son.

No wonder he kept in touch with her through all the years after his sweetheart passed away, until her lovely mother joined her beloved daughter in heaven; but it was your mom that made Jack learn why so many people talked about mother-in-laws in such a derogatory way. She hated Jack, she did from the start, and he had no other option than to accept and try his hardest to ignore her constant offenses and provocations. So now, he didn't even want to think of what your mom thought of him after Wyatt was born. 

As if you read Jack's thoughts, you touched his cheek, making him look at you 

"It's alright cowboy, if she starts acting out, we'll just leave, don't worry" you assured him and took a deep breath and got yourself back together as the doors opened and you walked to your mom's apartment. 

She'd left the door unlocked - something Whiskey strongly disapproved of for safety matters, of course, after all he was an agent and knew people should be way more careful than they were - and the two of you walked inside. Your mom had Wyatt on her lap, he sniffed as she tried wiping his tears, but his teary eyes were enough evidence she wasn't able to succeed.

"What happened baby?" You rushed to him, a sad expression immediately took your face as your heart tightened in your chest to see your little boy so upset. Wyatt jumped off his grandma's lap, widening eyes and a growing smile on his handsome little face

"Mama! Dada!" He squealed happily and ran towards you and Jack, who knelt just beside you and also opened his arms to welcome him. Wyatt ran to the two of you, feeling the warmth of the safety in being with both his parents, snuggling you both as best as his little arms could reach before looking at you with amusement and adoration at the sight of you with the hat on "cowboy hat mama! Like dada and mine!" He said happily and pointed at the stetson you'd stolen from Jack and grabbed it, placing it on your son's head seeing the happiness in his little eyes.

Jack chuckled and picked him up "well it ain't my favorite little cowboy?" He felt the way Wyatt's arms wrapped around his neck and his heart broke a little to think he could have that every day after coming back from work "were you nice to grandma?" Wyatt saw as his dada raised his eyebrow and immediately nodded, he had behaved well even if grandma's house wasn't fun. Whiskey smiled and tickled his tummy, earning the most lovely giggles from his little boy. 

Your mom shot you the dirtiest look the moment she caught Jack walking into the apartment, but you couldn't care less about it, so you turned your back to her and gave your son attention. 

"What happened to you, love? Grandma said you were upset?" You tilted your head curious to know what could've possibly bothered your son. 

Wyatt looked down and then at his grandma again, unsure if he should say anything at all or not. Jack gently wiped a single tear that ran down his son's beautiful face "it's okay Wyatt, sometimes cowboys get sad too, it ain't a shame to cry, but we can't make our mamas worried, cowboy mamas don't like to be worried about their little cowboys…" he tried reasoning his son, who let out a small giggle at his dad's fun words. 

"Bad dweam mama. Mama was gone and dada was gone" he explained "told gwandma but gwandma said I have no dada because dada no wove Wyatt" 

Jack closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying his best to keep his anger in check, as he shot daggers at his former mother-in-law. He couldn't believe that old bitch had the nerve to say that. Yes, Jack had been a shitty father for the first years of his son's life, but he was back in the picture and there wasn't anyone that old broken cowboy loved more than his son, and his son's mother.

He gently held his son's chin, finding fascinating the contrast between his big, calloused hands on his son's perfect, small face. Jack's thumb stroked his cheek 

"Your dada loves you very much Wyatt. More than anything in the world, and I know I wasn't around for you and mama and that made mama sad, but I'll always be with you two" he pecked his son's forehead and threw his small blanket over his back. Jack's arm snaked around your waist pulling you closer "let's get the two of you home" he informed, ignoring your mom who was speechless to see you so cozy next to him. Wyatt snuggled his dad's neck and closed his eyes, his heart was warm with love and reassurance. 

                         •••

As the three of you walked into your apartment, Wyatt was deeply asleep in his father's arms. You smiled to see how Wyatt still his jammies under the blanket and how quick he was able to calm down thanks to Jack. He followed your instructions to tuck Wyatt in and as soon as he came back, with his stetson in hands, you handed him a glass of water "I'm really sorry about my mom… I didn't know she would say something like that. She doesn't like you obviously, but we just always avoided talking about a father figure to Wyatt so we wouldn't break his little heart" Jack nodded in silence "I told her you were back in the picture and that you and I were working to be on good terms, you know, co-parent and be friends… She said it was a bad idea but didn't say anything else, I just didn't think she would be mean to the point of telling her own grandson this shit" you sniffed and Jack pulled you into a tight hug. His hands ran up and down your back, resting his chin on your head 

"It's alright sugar, none of this is your fault. You've been perfect from day one. You've been perfect to me and you were the best girlfriend in the world and you would've been the best wife too, if I hadn't screwed things up… I was so scared, I know it doesn't justify and it never will, but I was scared of trying to build a family and losing it like the first time. I was so deep in my own fears that I hadn't realized I was about to make the worst mistake of my life. I'm really sorry I did this to you, because you had nothing but love to offer me, while I offered you the second place because I was too blind by my grief, but now I see, now that I'm going to therapy, that I'm trying to fix myself, I see that I was scared of letting go of her, of her memory, I was scared I was going to betray her. Until I finally saw that was madness, sugar, because she is gone, she's a beautiful memory and I'll always carry her and our son in a part of my heart, but they belong in the past. I see now you're the love of my life, you've always been, I was just too blind to see it, and I lost you, but I promise I won't grieve you, I'll be here, strong and alive for you and Wyatt, if there's ever a chance of a future with you, even if all I get is visiting on weekends I'll still take it. Nothing will ever change the monstrous thing I did to you, but I want you to know I regret it for the rest of my life" 

Your breath was shaking as you look up at him, you could feel the emotion in his voice, the truth in them and the tears in his eyes. 

"Stay tonight Jack, please… not to have sex, but I want you here" it was all you could offer him and it was already a big deal, the two of you knew it and he only nodded happily, his hand caressing your skin.

"I'll stay for as long as you want me sugar…"

                            •••

In the early morning, you woke up to find yourself alone in bed. Jack took his southern manners to the letter and after you fell asleep in his arms, he changed to the couch, so he wouldn't make you uncomfortable. You sighed as your head pounded after drinking so hard the night before, sighing as you remembered everything that went on. The things you shouldn't have done, for example flirt with your ex the whole time, kiss him and wearing his hat and especially ask him to stay the night, because now you'd have to deal with the fact the man was humming happily in your kitchen making you breakfast as a loving husband would. 

You got out of bed and groaned in pain once more, cursing under your breath as you spotted a glass of water and an aspirin. Fuck, Jack was making it very hard for you to hate him. 

The man, on the other hand, was pouring his heart into the meal he was preparing. There were two things little Jack Daniela learned from his mama: breakfast was the most important meal of the day and that the best ingredient one could add is love.

The moment he saw you walking inside the kitchen, his face lit up, glad to know Wyatt was still deeply asleep, so he would have some time alone with you. He placed the frying pan down, flipping the last pancake and walked to you. 

"Morning, sugar" he said in a happy voice as he got closer and leaned in to kiss your lips, but you immediately turned your face away, avoiding his kiss as you looked down. 

"Listen Jack, we need to talk… I'm sorry about last night, I know I led you the wrong way, I flirted and kissed but it was wrong and it shouldn't have happened" you said without much conviction in your voice, as if you were trying to convince yourself more than him, so you cleared your throat and continued "we can't be together, I know you're trying, Jack, you're becoming a better man, but I have a boyfriend now and you will always be the man who abandoned me and our son" you sighed sadly "I was just giving into my desires…"

Jack immediately gripped your hips, pulling you closer, a desperate look on his face, he was hurt and you could see it in his eyes 

"Desire, that's the right word, sugar. You desire me, you want me, why do you still deny it? We love each other" he said, stroking your cheek, swallowing hard and giving you the saddest eyes you'd ever seen. "We can be a happy family… you, me, our son and if you want to we can even try for a little girl, I promise I'll be around, I want to be a husband to you and a father to our son…"

"You're out of your mind, Jack, I would never be with you again, I would never be crazy to let you get me pregnant again! You made me go away! You told me to get rid of my son! I've fallen for you once, but I won't anymore. Yes, I had desire for you, because you are the kind of guy that's good for a drunk fuck and nothing else, Jack. I had to learn the hard way guys like you are meant to be fucked and guys like Frankie are meant to be married"

Jack immediately let go of your body, looking down in shame and sniffed, nodding and turning his back to you. Jack's pride was hurt, and his heart was shattered. He knew you would take your distance once you sobered up, but he didn't think you would regress so much. You were back at fighting and accusing each other, and he was tired of that. 

"Mama! Dada!" Wyatt squealed happily as he watched his mommy and daddy in the kitchen, his small tummy growling with hunger at the delicious smell. 

"Dada, you made pancakes for me? Thank you, thank you, thank you!" He squealed adorably and jumped into Jack's arms, who held his son tight against his chest, snuggling him, and pecked his son's cheek gently, you knew Jack was a fearless man when he was on his missions, but now, he avoided staring at you, so you wouldn't see the tears that threatened to spill out of his beautiful chocolate brown eyes. 

You didn't even know why you'd said that, but you needed to make sure Jack would keep his hands to himself, you didn't want to be a fool for the second time and he had no right to try and seduce you with a baby talk. Jack wasn't meant to be a father and you'd been nice enough to let him be around Wyatt. On the other hand, you had never thought of marrying Frankie, that made no sense, all you knew was that you wanted to hurt Jack and it seemed like you achieved your goal.

_____

A/N: How dare reader say those things to Jack??? Why can't they be together already 😭😭😭😭

[alice-after-dark]

Hm... It slightly grinds my gears that, however much I absolutely love radiostatic, people seem to think that someone can only be so obsessed like vox if they were rejected/had romantic/sexual feelings, and that Alastor/Vox's split has entirely to do with Vox's having a one sided crush and Alastor being uncomfortable with it?

Like, I love radiostatic, don't get me wrong, so of course I do understand the appeal of vox's having a pathetic crush or obsession with Alastor. But what I mean is that, there is some evidence that they were partners for a long time, and built an understanding and friendship off that. And they're both overlords. I just don't think Alastor would be shy about relationships at all, he would understand it as a way to manipulate people that maybe he himself is not inclined to. And so if anything, the reason that they split could have a lot to do with existing problems in their friendship and changing power dynamics, if anything. But none of these are confirmed, we don't even have confirmation that vox was in love with alastor, so it is a little weird that almost everyone agrees the problem was the unreciprocated crush.

Tl;dr friendships can break for reasons other than unreciprocated romantic feelings, and people can be obsessed for reasons besides love/rejection. Ok but all that said, I actually enjoy most of the content so LOL.

Also I heard that the idea of carmilla and zestial being the most powerful comes from a piece of either semi-canon or discarded canon interview where they ranked 2nd and 1st of the overlords respectively, and vox ranked 3rd, but idk how accurate that is (I highly doubt it's authenticity)

Holy long ask!

*cracks knuckles*

Starting at the end cause that's the easiest to address ngl, but yeah I doubt it's authenticity too. Huge Vox fan here and even I would not rank him fucking THIRD in power. Dude is strong, but I don't think he's that strong.

On the rest, nah I totally get you. I absolutely adore RadioStatic (have you been on my blog? lol), but I'm not personally big on the whole unreciprocated crush angle. I personally think Vox's anger and obsession come from Alastor's (real? perceived?) betrayal of their friendship in some capacity. He saw Alastor as someone he could trust and had that trust broken in some way. At least, that's how things would come across from his side of it. I personally think they're both at fault and letting their pride get in the way of actually talking it out and dealing with their issues.

While the crush thing is totally a viable situation, I think there are some far more interesting ones out there. Like...the idea that they had a strong enough friendship for Alastor to allow a clear photo of him to be taken with Vox and yet he was so put off by a crush that it completely destroyed it? Doesn't sit well with me, no thanks. And yeah, I can see Vox being hurt, maybe a little pissy, but if he truly cared for Alastor as much as the fandom seems to think he does, then again, it doesn't entirely make sense that he would let his crush ruin it. Yeah, he absolutely seems to want revenge on Alastor, but I don't think it has to do with a crush.

[fanfic-lover-girl]

Do Draco Fans Really Love Draco?

I read a Quora post last year when I was still new to HP where the user did an AO3 fic analysis and pointed to the number of fanfics to prove how much Draco's fans love him and how overrated he is.

But I think all these fanfics prove how misunderstood Draco is as a character. You see all these fics where:

his parents are abusive

he was an angel all along and it's his parents' fault why he's mean

he becomes all hot and bothered like a fanboy for Harry as soon as Harry shows him some sort of decency

Draco is basically Ron but rich and blonde

he is basically male Ginny but rich and blonde

he simps for Hermione and thinks she is the most beautiful girl in the school (as if!)

his redemption fics have all his mean moments transplanted on another character (eg. Blaise, Theo, Vincent, Gregory or some random male OC) to make him look better

he acts all girly

he's a loner and no one understands him

he's self-conscious or has low self-esteem

he takes all the blame for his bad relationship with the trio like the golden trio were saints who never hurt him too and basically kisses their butts to repent

he's a mini Voldemort in training

he's a manwhore

befriending the golden trio is the only way for him to have a better life

befriending/dating someone in the golden trio is part of his redemption arc

he and Hermione are bestie study buddies

he and Harry use the sectumsempra scars as a romantic/sexual bonding moment

he renounces his pureblood supremacy beliefs faster than a Thanos snap

Astoria is the only reason he changed like he was not traumatized by an awful war

he can't fight or he's weak/pathetic etc...

Draco is not a poor misunderstood, abused baby or a demon child, baby Hitler. He's a normal boy who grew up with bigoted views. He has a loving family. He likes making impressions and being a class clown. He calls out Harry's show-off behaviour when no one else will. He tells things as it is when he calls out Hagrid for being an atrocious teacher and Hogwarts being a dumpster fire school. He likes girls and goes on to have a nice family. He repeatedly warns the golden trio about the approaching DEs and tells them to leave the area while being a complete jerk and laughing at the possibility of Hermione being attacked at the same time. He's not a wimp and can land blows in fights. He can be overly dramatic. He can be stoic in the face of humiliation/abuse. He's creative and artistic. He's a spoiled heir of a rich family who's confident and knows his worth. He's classist. He bit off more than he could chew when he became a DE. He has been group assaulted multiple times by his peers, more than what his rude behaviour deserved. He holds grudges against people who offend him. He seems to have good chemistry with his house. The golden trio accuse him of crimes we never see evidence of while being hypocrites and doing the same behaviour themselves (eg. Hermione accusing Draco of bullying first years as a prefect then she and Ron proceed to bully first years multiple times as prefects). He never truly shined because his author hated him.

I just want Draco content where he is portrayed fairly. Interesting fics without Drarry would be great too. Lord knows Drarry and Dramione are major culprits in this warping of poor Draco's character. Fanon Draco can be fun too but so many times it just feels like an OC with Draco's face on it.

I wish Draco could have more of the same kind of great self-actualization fics that Severus Snape has where he is allowed to be his best self without gay romance involved or where the romance is a background thing or where the golden trio are not involved. Just him vibing with other Slytherins and forgetting the golden trio even exists. I have enjoyed many amazing Draco fics but now that I have come to understand book!Draco more, a lot of them make me feel kind of unsatisfied and hollow now.

[idkfitememate]

It’s early so I’m bound to be a bit off but here’s one of my takes/theorys/headcannons on BSD Mori

WARNING!!! PEDOPHILIA IS A MAIN TOPIC OF THIS DISCUSSION!!! BE WARNED!!!

(Another reminder, I am a minor so if you don’t agree or dislike it? Please don’t send hate.)

Mori is very confirmed to be a Pedo/Lolicon, that is super established yes. But we've never gotten real true evidence that he's hurt a child in that way.

He's never touched a child.

Never done anything of that nature to a child.

From what I can tell, he enjoys the natural naïveté and innocents of children, and corrupting it - which to be fair is what a lot of pedo’s like. But in his specific case he enjoys preforming in other means.

It’s like an abusive relationship where one partner toys with the other for their own sexual gratification while ultimately braking the other.

The only time we've ever seen him around a child with even a hint of sexual connotation was the scene where he was dressing Elise, but that wasn't a sexual scene, if anything it was just displaying "Look it's the Pedo hate him hate him!!!"

Vita Sexualis makes Mori's perfect partner come to life and able to preform impossible tasks, but he still has control, and from what we've seen from his and Elise's appearances is that he enjoys that innocence, maybe a hint of brattiness, but nothing inherently sexual.

Is he still in the wrong? Absolutely. It's disgusting to want a romantic relationship with a child, even with no sexual attraction, but it's interesting to think about.

A pedo with no real sexual attraction to children, only 'genuine love'. He enjoys dressing them, having control over them, feeding them, so on and so forth - like a father but with romantic affection.

Nothing sexual.

Also that fact that he seems to be specifically a Pedophile, not a Hebephile or a Ephebephile. Elise isn't over ten, and Yosano was eleven. While technically eleven falls into the Hebephile range, it's safe to assume he most likely likes kids - specifically pre-pubescent kids. On top of that the fact he's straight - He showed no attraction to Dazai whatsoever, considering Dazai is both a man and was pubescent - at the very least just pubescent - when they first encountered.

People who are Hebephile's are usually explained away by letting the most primitive parts of their brain have control, as Hebephile's are those who like children who have just hit puberty - otherwise know as ready to bear/give children. Those who are Ephebephile's like children who have just passed puberty - I.e. 15-18. They are commonly placed with Pedophile's in terms of wrongdoing because there's physically no reason to like children in that stage.

Mori is by definition a Pedophile, a man who likes children that are prepubescent, ranging from about 5 to 10/11 years old. Not sexually, but is still attracted.

Pedophilia is commonly tracked as a mental disorder/illness, that has been proven to be curable at times. The reason for this being that in no way shape or form should a sane or healthy mind be able to conceive that a full adult should be attracted to a child.

Pedophilia is a trait passed down, some studies have even suggested it may be genetic on top of being traumatic.

So more likely than not, Mori was either:

A) Abused himself

B) Related to a pedophile

Or worst of all

C) Both

And judging by his twisted mindset I wouldn't be surprised if it was C.

My IRL Friend asked: “Wasn't Elise's form an older one until after Mori encountered Yosano in that war?”

To answer that question, Elise was much more compliant and had less of a personality before Yosano. After Mori had met Yosano, she took on the brashness and brattiness Yosano had. I've yet to see anything naming an age change, but it still stands to say Mori is best classed as a Pedophile over anything else because that would mean Elise aged down.

Another thing, people commonly fall in love with others that remind them of past abusers, and I've been thinking about this for a while. We get our attractions from many different sources that tend to leave impressions on us.

And that's not to say that Mori didn't get his likes from other sources - I.e. personality from Yosano/Dazai, but what about Elise's looks. It's very reasonable to assume that he got those likes from outside sources.

But it's also common to try and romanticize or humanize past abuses.

Elise - as I said - was very robotic and blank before Mori met Yosano & Dazai, even referring to Mori as 'Master', and he didn't seem to have much care for her. But she looked the same.

It's likely that Mori took the looks of a past abuser - perhaps the one who passed the Pedophilic trait to him - and humanized her by giving her the traits of Yosano/Dazai.

And although names don't mean much in Lore for BSD, Elsie is a very foreign name for a Japanese person to name someone. Perhaps that was the name of the woman who hurt him, and he simply passed it down.

She most likely would've acted like Dazai and Yosano in a way - albeit much more twisted - but enough so that Mori was able to humanize her by taking those traits.

This could be a way to get back at her for the abuse done, a long winded revenge story.

He could also simply be continuing the cycle - as we've seen he love starting and continuing those.

Does any of this justify his actions? Hell to the no, but it gives them an explanation over 'Oh look a lolicon/Pedophilie point and laugh at how disgusting he is!!!"

(I wrote this all at like 3 am so if anything is spelled wrong or grammatically incorrect please let me know!!… God I love Mori sm it’s not good or healthy-)

[addictedtostorytelling]

Hello! I love to read everything you write, I think you have a lot of talent!

A few days ago I watched episode 2 of the third season of CSI again, the last time I saw this episode I was a kid and honestly I didn't remember it very well nor did I pay much attention to it, but as an adult I was surprised by the way in which Haviland's lawyer humiliated Sara implying that she was nothing more than a climber who is where she is because between her and Grissom there is something sexual maybe and she does what he asks to accommodate the cases, that is, they didn't even attack her with Some mistake she made in the case or another case, it was a very low blow.

And then when Grissom goes up, the lawyer doesn't mention any of this to him! Basically it is implied that Sara is the slut because she is the woman, Grissom the boss does not receive any comment about this alleged manipulation of evidence that Sabra does in favor of Grissom, I would like to know your opinion about this. I also have another question, do you think that at some point Grissom knew what they told Sara on the stand? Because if one day he knew it, I imagine that mortified him and contributed to his decisions later, justifying himself that he did not want Sara to be treated like that just because she was in a relationship with him and people would stop respecting her maybe?

English is not my first language so , sorry for any mistake !

hi, anon!

thank you for your kind words! i'm so glad you enjoy my writing! and no need to apologize—your english is great!

so i will say up front, i've always quibbled with this particular story beat, not on account of the line of questioning itself—which, as i will discuss below, i believe is unfortunately fairly realistic, and especially for the early 2000s—but rather with the notion the defense lawyer even has all that dirt on sara to begin with.

i mean, looking at the scene in episode 02x05 “scuba doobie-doo,” there is literally no one around to see grissom and sara down by the building’s entryway, let alone to see them from a close enough vantage point to realize she is touching his cheek “in a romantic gesture.”

neither clifford renteria’s apartment nor the property manager’s apartment has windows facing the entryway area—just check out where the main door to the apartment complex is located compared to the position of the two units in the hallway when we’re shown grissom and sara entering the building earlier in the episode—so it’s unlikely warrick, brass, the police detail assigned to the scene, or even the suspect property manager (i.e., all of the people who even know who grissom and sara are and/or might give a damn about how they touch each other) would have been able to glimpse grissom and sara while they were all still inside and grissom and sara out.

and even if there were a police officer or some other lvpd or lab employee standing in the parking lot taking a smoke break or talking on their phone or something and they happened to witness the interaction from afar, why would they initially hold onto that information only to then later share it with an unscrupulous defense attorney in an extremely high-profile case much later on? how would the defense attorney even find them (or they find her)?

after all, the events of episode 02x05 “scuba doobie-doo” take place within the universe of the show on 10.02.01, while the events of episode 03x02 “the accused is entitled” take place on 09.21.02, meaning nearly a full year passes between the time when grissom and sara are supposedly seen touching and the first time that information comes publicly to light.

are we to believe what this hypothetical unseen lvpd employee witnesses bothers them so badly they remember it almost a full year later but somehow have never done anything about it in the interim?

after all, there is never any kind of investigation into grissom and sara’s conduct during the renteria case, much less disciplinary action initiated against them, throughout the remainder of s2, so obviously if someone in the department witnessed the interaction, they never formally reported it.

i mean, that’s part of why it’s such a shock to people in the department when six years later it comes out that grissom and sara have been carrying on this secret romantic relationship, right? because prior to grissom’s confession during sara’s kidnapping (see episode 07x24 “living doll”), there has never been any kind of definitive proof of anything ~unprofessional~ going on between them previously. departmental gossip concerning their weird, flirty vibes aside, no cut and dried evidence (much less a paper trail) confirming they either have been or are romantically involved exists. that revelation just seemingly comes out of nowhere, at least as far as the department administration is concerned.

why would this hypothetical lvpd employee decline to file a report and then turn around and “talk out of school” to a lawyer in an off-the-record capacity? why would they hamstring the department’s case that way?

the whole idea doesn’t make sense.

and the possibility of a “civilian witness” being the one to provide the information is likewise implausible.

i mean, sure, maybe one of the apartment-dwellers on the entryway side of the building or some rando standing in the parking lot might be able to look out their window or across the way and notice grissom and sara’s positioning, but if so, would they even know who grissom and sara are? and would they even realize sara touching grissom’s face was inappropriate? and even if they did, would they even care enough to go through all of the trouble to report it? and would they even be able to accurately identify grissom (with his baseball cap concealing his hair color) and sara, both of them under cover of darkness, to lvpd hr if they did?

doubtful.

and especially not given grissom and sara are at the time dressed like maintenance workers. i mean, how many people would get up in arms at two plumbers or movers sharing a tender caress outside of their apartment building? might strike someone as a bit weird but not necessarily as “forbidden” and “actionable.”

of course, even if said hypothetical random witness did somehow recognize grissom and sara’s inappropriate actions, take the initiative to contact department hr about the issue, and accurately describe them to the point where they could be positively identified, again, how would tom haviland’s defense attorney end up with that information almost one full year later?

this hypothetical witness would have had to report what they had seen to the crime lab hr department back in october ‘01, filing some kind of formal complaint, for there to have been any kind of record of grissom and sara’s behavior available in september ‘02.

the attorney then would have had to somehow gain access to this formal complaint during the events of the haviland case.

and, as discussed above, said hypothetical witness obviously didn't file any complaint, as no record of it is ever mentioned on the show and it never comes up during the proceedings of the case.

in the absence of such a report, haviland’s lawyers would have to interview basically every coworker, suspect, person-of-interest, witness, bystander, etc. in every case grissom and sara have ever worked together in sara’s (by that time) two years at the lab, asking leading questions to see if they could turn up evidence of anything ~untoward~ ever having happened between them, until somehow they struck pay-dirt with this unlikely hypothetical witness from the renteria case, who could then confirm to them, “oh, yeah, she did totally touch his cheek in a private moment outside the building.”

there's just no way this whole thing went down like that.

finding that person with that specific information would be like finding a single, specific grain of sand on a beach.

even if, based on grissom’s heart-struck reaction to finding out about sara’s relationship with hank, phillip gerard inferred his former pupil’s feelings for his young subordinate—and also perhaps her feelings in return for him, given how panicked she seems when the revelation is made—and went on a “fact-finding” mission, again, how did he turn up this information when no kind of formal record of it seems to exist?

while it’s somewhat plausible that, if properly plied, maybe someone at the lab might blab about how “oh, yeah, grissom and sara have always kind of had a ~thing~ for each other”—a la the comments the day trace tech, dorsey, makes to nick in episode 04x11 “eleven angry jurors”—how does said blabbing lead gerard and the rest of the defense team to the information regarding the events of episode 02x05 “scuba doobie-doo”?

if they were solely working off of department gossip, the lawyers probably wouldn’t have been able to pinpoint one particular occasion when grissom and sara had crossed a line.

instead, their tack should have just more generally been to throw sara off by confronting her point-blank on the stand with the question, “are you in love with your boss?” forcing her to answer under oath.

but even then, that’s a really long-shot possibility, contingent on both gerard’s ability to accurately diagnose sara’s feelings for grissom, even without having known her previously, and him and the defense team again finding this hypothetical anonymous witness who is willing to provide intel to them (even though they are presumably on the opposite side of the case).

i mean, it’s not like they would have had time to subpoena anyone or depose them under oath, so this person would have had to speak out of their own volition. and why would they, if they were a lab employee? even if they thought grissom and sara’s dynamic was inappropriate, why would they go to the haviland team with that information rather than to hr, right in the middle of the case?

so.

all of the above is to say that, by and large, for as fun and dramatic as it is to have haviland’s lawyer blindside sara with that allegation regarding her feelings for grissom while she is up on the stand, it isn’t particularly realistic.

it just doesn’t really make sense for the lawyer to have that information—not when it’s so implausible that she could ever even know about the infamous episode 02x05 “scuba doobie-doo” chalk touch interaction to begin with.

but i digress.

suspending our disbelief and ignoring the gaping plot hole for the moment, as stated above, unfortunately, i do think the defense lawyer’s line of questioning to sara—and lack of a similar line of questioning to grissom—is otherwise very true to life.

more discussion after the "keep reading," if you're interested.

__

to me, if we ignore the issue of informational provenance, it rings very true that tom haviland's lawyer would, in the absence of actual professional errors on sara’s part, attempt to undermine sara’s credibility by making allegations regarding sara's romantic relationships with hank and grissom.

that she would frame the "hank moved the bra" thing in terms of sara and hank's sexual dynamic tracks.

that she would choose to make a personal attack against sara’s behavior around men tracks.

that she would try to paint sara as some kind of pathetic, lovestruck loser hung up on her much-older boss and willing to manipulate evidence to impress him tracks.

that she wouldn’t level any kind of similar claims against grissom (who isn't vulnerable to those types of offensives in the same way sara is, just by virtue of him being a man) tracks.

—and especially given the episode’s temporal setting in the early 2000s.

we need only look to the bill clinton affair for a real-life analog.

in 1999, just three years prior to when this episode takes place within the universe of the show, sitting american president bill clinton was discovered to have had a sexual affair with a white house intern by the name of monica lewinsky. the affair had begun in 1995, when clinton was forty-nine years old and lewinsky twenty-two. he was in a position of extreme power over her at the time, not only as her boss but also as the leader of the nation, widely considered the most powerful man in the world.

while clinton did face some political repercussions for his actions—most significantly, impeachment for lying about the affair under oath before a grand jury—in the court of public opinion, lewinsky was treated far more harshly than he.

at that time, the affair was known as “the lewinsky scandal”—not the clinton scandal.

for years afterward, lewinsky struggled to find work, despite having an excellent education and credentials otherwise.

she was the butt of meanspirited jokes disparaging her sexuality and treating her as a naïve bimbo at best and an opportunistic whore at worst on every late night and variety television show in the country.

vernacularly, “lewinsky’d” became a crude slang term to refer to a particular sex act.

people questioned why she would seduce such a powerful man. identified her as a gold-digging, hypersexual homewrecker whose libido all but brought down both a power marriage and a presidential administration.

even supposedly highbrow news organizations such as the wall street journal and new york times referred to her in print as “a little tart” and a “ditzy, predatory white house intern.”

—and this they did largely without smearing clinton to the same degree or on similar grounds.

the public attitude toward him was far less hostile, with the prevailing national sentiment seeming to be, “well, he shouldn’t have jeopardized his own career or embarrassed his political office that way, but of course he had sex with her! faced with that sweet, young thing flat-out begging for it, can you really blame him?”

he remained in office to the end of his second term. did not ultimately end up losing his marriage. maintained a prominent position with the clinton foundation. by the time of his wife’s 2016 presidential run, had had his image almost completely rehabilitated, to the point where the affair was (and still is) almost a footnote alongside his other mainline biographical details.

lewinsky has since talked about her treatment throughout the scandal, highlighting the inappropriate power differential between herself and clinton (“[he was] the most powerful man, my boss, forty-nine years old. i was twenty-two, literally just out of college. and i think that the power differentials there are something that i couldn’t ever fathom consequences at twenty-two that i understand obviously so differently at forty-eight”) as well as the unevenness of how they were, as the two primary figures in the scandal, treated by the media and the public.

in the wake of #metoo, lewinsky has finally opened up about how devastating the effects of this nationalized character assassination on her were, admitting she suffered from “strong suicidal temptations several times during the investigation and one or two periods after.”

and while of course the two situations are ultimately very different, not only in scope but also in the nature of the relationships themselves, one can easily see how sara’s experience in episode 03x02 “the accused is entitled” bears resemblance to “the lewinsky treatment.”

particularly in that pre-#metoo era, it was unfortunately very common for the women involved in public sexual scandals to bear the brunt of the judgment and consequences more so than their male counterparts—even when the men in question were older and in positions of power over them.

the tendency was to question why the actress would “willingly” lie down on that casting couch, not how come the male director even had said casting couch in his office to begin with.

it was the woman’s morals and motives that were questioned, not the man’s.

so from that perspective, i think what sara endures in this episode—in all its unfair, sexist ugliness—is, unfortunately, realistic.

she—as the young, attractive woman who supposedly has something to gain from seducing her much-older boss—is the obvious target for that particular line of questioning, whereas grissom—as the older man, whose response to said “seduction” would be viewed as “only natural”—is not.

as for the second part of your question, it’s hard to say whether or not grissom knows the exact nature of what is said to sara in court.

i don’t think sara herself would ever tell him the nature of the cross-examination, not only because she would be too scared/humiliated but also because, at the time, she is probably trying to avoid him as much as possible (given their recent awkward “you deserve to have a life” run-in).

and, obviously, grissom also isn’t present to witness that line of questioning play out in person himself.

however, even without sara fessing up or him being privy to what happens in person, he might still potentially hear tell of the debacle from someone else later on.

in the episode, nick, warrick, and catherine are all present at the courthouse prior to the scene where sara provides her testimony. though none of them is shown on camera while sara is on the stand, one or more of them could nonetheless be sitting in the courtroom gallery.

since the scene where catherine is on the stand takes place immediately after sara’s testimony is shown, she might be the most likely candidate to “witness the carnage.”

if she is present, of course, she doesn’t immediately relay what she hears to grissom when she returns to the lab.

still.

it’s not outside the realm of possibility she could at some point later on fill him in (even after the case has been wrapped).

and of course the same goes for nick or warrick if they are present for sara’s cross, as well.

likewise, grissom could also potentially learn that information retroactively for himself if he ever reads the court transcripts from the trial after the fact.

and if he does learn it, either way?

then i'm sure he’s mortified.

for as selfish as many of grissom’s reasons for maintaining his distance from sara during her early years in las vegas are, he has always had some awareness his reputation is not the only one on the line where them potentially having a relationship might be concerned.

he knows very well if they were to commence a sexual relationship and it were to become public knowledge around the department—either because they came forward with it of their own volitions or because someone found them out—then there would likely be fallout for her, too.

she could be fired and blackballed from the field just as easily as he could—if not more so, considering his reputation is already firmly established, whereas she is still an “up-and-comer.”

and even if she kept her job, her reputation still might be ruined.

people might question: did she come by her position and professional accolades on merit or did she get them by “sleeping her way to the top”?

grissom hates to think of how such a revelation might negatively affect her—that she, like monica lewinsky, might get branded as some kind of opportunistic strumpet or naïve bimbo, all for his sake.

honestly, even if grissom never learns of what happens during sara’s cross-examination in the haviland case, i’m sure these concerns are still never too far from his mind anyhow—he probably can’t help but think about how damaging being with him could prove to sara’s career every time they work a case like the one in episode 04x12 “butterflied,” where a younger woman having a relationship with an older male coworker gets painted with a certain unsavory reputation in their shared workspace.

certainly, these concerns might play a role in his repeated rebuffs of sara during s1-s4 and, in particular, figure into why he—subconsciously—is so averse to granting sara the key position promotion in s4.

and especially if he does learn about her experience on the stand. it’s easy for him to keep telling himself, “it’s better for both of us if we don’t risk it,” even though, in his heart of hearts, he knows that line of thinking isn’t true.

anyway, i've gone on for a while now.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[llliiinnnaaa]

Reprisal | Chapter Five

coriolanus snow x gaul oc

Summary: Ten years after the Tenth Hunger Games, Coriolanus Snow is under Dr. Volumnia Gaul’s wing as a Gamemaker alongside her niece. Unbeknownst to either of them, they’re both being prepared for a much greater task.

Warning: This story will contain explicit violence against adults and children alike (I mean, it’s Dr. Gaul AND Snow) as well as explicit language, and sexual situations.

***This fic is in no way, shape, or form, me endorsing or co-signing the horrific shit Snow does, nor am I trying to romanticize it. Also, apathy and will be the main driving force of any remnants of a relationship between my OC and Snow’s character. So if you’re interested in something very romantic and fluffy…it’s not gonna be this.

Enjoy!

     He can feel the disappointment leaching from his cousin the whole ride to her apartment. 

She had been quick to help, as always, rushing to the two of them as Tawny pulled her pants back up, Tigris grabbed the woman’s high heels and slipped them back on her feet while Coriolanus smoothed his outfit and stepped out of the dining room, going to the guest bathroom to scrub any unseen lipstick off of himself. 

She helped them make everything appear as if nothing were out of place, smoothed the knotted up table cloth and scanned for anymore evidence. 

She carried on conversation as they were saying goodbye, pretending not to see the stolen glances between Coriolanus and Tawny. 

Even now, she chirps with Livia as if she hadn’t witnessed her husband in a compromising position with his colleague whose anniversary they had celebrated moments prior. 

When the car rolls to the front of Tigris’ building, Coriolanus hops out and helps her out of the vehicle, too. 

“Thank you, Coriolanus.” She expects him to get back in, but he instead tells his wife and the driver, “I’m walking her up.” 

It’s silent and dreadful all the way up, and when she finally unlocks her door and steps in, he comes in after her. 

“ She’s married , Coriolanus.” It’s said gently after she shuts the door, assuming this is why he came up with her. 

To get this settled away. 

“I know, Tigris.” 

“ You’re married .”

“I know.”

She doesn’t say anything else for a moment, trying to read her cousin’s expression. 

Not a shred of guilt or remorse. 

“Are you…leaving Livia, or —”

“—I’m not leaving Livia.” He states. 

“Well…are you unhappy with Livia?” 

“No.” He says it genuinely, as if he’s wondering why she would even think he was unhappy. 

“Is she leaving Dyess?” 

“No.” 

“Is she unhappy with Dyess?” 

“As if it weren’t obvious tonight?” He scoffs, a frown tugging at her lips before she quietly asks, “Do you love her?”

“Ugh, Tigris .” He nearly groans it out, sighing and rubbing his forehead that’s starting to ache with her questions, as she retorts, “I’m sorry, Coriolanus, I’m just startled.”

“We’re just…” He trails off, not knowing what to describe it as, Tigris waiting patiently for some sort of explanation. “…It doesn’t mean anything.” Is all he can come up with. 

“ It doesn’t mean anything ?” She almost hisses it. “If Livia or Dyess finds out they’ll be crushed . Your reputation, Tawny’s reputation, will be ruined. It means everything , Coriolanus.” 

“That’s the thing, though, isn’t it, Tigris? They won’t find out.” His tone is cold, stern, certain. 

She knew how he could get when he became paranoid of someone turning on him, betraying him, he’d become callus and distant.

They already weren’t as close as they had been as children, the Tenth Hunger Games and the events after it had changed him.

Tigris chooses her words carefully.

“I’m not saying a word to them because it’s not my place to say it. But if you two keep acting so brazenly they very well may find out. And I’m worried it will overshadow all of your hard work for the both of you.” She warns him. “And if it gets back to Dr. Gaul…” 

She’s frightened by what the woman might do. 

Tigris figures she’d be infuriated at such unprofessional behavior between the two of them. 

Snow doesn’t know if she’ll be angry, or amused. She favors them both, guiding them both under her wing more than others. Perhaps she wouldn’t be surprised at all. 

“Nobody will find out.” His statement puts the issue to rest then and there…the very image of his father when he does so. 

Stoic, militant…

She takes in a breath and nods quietly, not daring to utter another word of it again — ever . 

     The next night, Tawny once more reads over the case Philo had dropped off to her, elbows propped on her desk. 

It’s practically the same one she just did that had failed. 

Failed cases were revisited by others to see if it were truly a failure or a dumb mistake the first person had made, but she has a feeling that either Snow or her aunt changed a few things around and gave her her own failure to pick through. 

She rubs her forehead, closing her tired eyes.

No longer does she have the energy to try.

There was no point, it was going to be a waste just like most of the ones within the last year had been. 

A knock at her office door has her eyes opening, sitting back in her chair to try to wake herself up a little more. 

“Come in.” She calls, relief filling her at the sight of her aunt.

“I came to drop this off.” Volumnia holds out a wrapped box. “An anniversary gift.”

“You didn’t have to get us anything.” Tawny stands and accepts, sweetly eyeing the silver wrapping paper. 

“Oh, no, no, no, no .” She says tsks. “It is not for him . Only you .” 

Tawny’s brows furrow, looking at the box, now afraid to open it. 

“I’d like for you to open it after my Game has been played.” She adds. 

“Okay.” Tawny politely replies to Dr. Gaul, setting it aside. 

Volumnia takes the opportunity to glance down at the woman’s desk, full, red lips twitching at the sight of her niece’s new case at her fingertips.

“I see Mr. Snow has given you another case.” She starts. 

“Yes, it’s similar to my last failure…just on a different species.” Tawny replies, somewhat glad she won’t have to be cutting into any more Avoxes for now.

“Hmm.” Dr. Gaul hums. “I do hope it works the way it’s intended to, Dr. Crane.” She adds. “I’ve been waiting quite a while to see one of your wonders in my arena…with this particular year being an exceptional opportunity.” 

“What is it you mean by that, exactly?” Tawny questions, curiously. 

“The Twenty Year Anniversary of the Hunger Games. The arena is changing, the stakes will be higher — ”

“ — The arena will be changing?” 

Dr. Gaul lets out a soft breath, stopping herself. 

“I thought Mr. Snow would have told you by now.” She says, raising her brows. 

“Told me what?” 

“Years ago, he had implemented the idea of a…change in scenery, if you will. Fortunately it’s ready this year.” She pipes. 

“Which is why everyone’s been pressured to come up with so many successful mutations to be picked from.” Tawny adds, to which her aunt nods. 

“We need only one more. Everyone has submitted all of theirs for review, except you.” Dr. Gaul states, next. “Mr. Snow has been more than generous with his patience…so many believe you shouldn’t even be in the running for it.” 

“Well, they might all get their wish. My last one was a failure, they’ve all been for the most part.” Tawny huffs out, rolling her jaw.

“I have a feeling this one won’t be so bad.” Dr. Gaul says surely, her tone a promise more so than an optimistic thought as she walks to the door. 

“Dr. Gaul,” Tawny stops her, a question itching at her ever since Dyess had brought it up, “There’s a rumor going around that the creators of the three mutts that are picked to be incorporated into this year's Games will be awarded medals by President Ravinstill…is that true?” 

“Why, Dr. Crane, I never took you as the type whose mouth watered for accolades and recognition.” Dr. Gaul pipes. 

“If I’m breaking my neck to try to make the Games better, I believe I need to be recognized for my hard work.” She admits, watching as Dr. Gaul nods slowly. 

“Good night, Dr. Crane.” 

She neither confirms nor denies the rumor.

     Coriolanus paces the floor of the morgue, Philo standing near him, waiting patiently for Dr. Gaul.

“This is bullshit.” The blonde mumbles, glaring over the open carcass of the dead Avox. 

He had been shown the injection site of where Dyess had given the high concentration of Iron to the subject, thus setting fire to the whole case. 

“Umm…Mr. Snow, I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be here.” Philo mumbles, worried Dr. Gaul will be displeased with his presence despite him quickly becoming Snow’s righthand man in terms of somewhat shady and odd dealings like spying on Dr. Crane – the both of them – reporting back to him.

He knew Dyess Crane was no good, using his wife’s intelligence to get on top before throwing her off, and he knew Snow wanted him exposed and gone…

But it still seemed like a personal matter that should stay between Snow and Gaul. 

“I want you here, Mr. Marius, so you’re here until I dismiss you. Do you understand?” Snow hisses. 

“Yes.” 

The doors open and in walks Volumnia, her shoes padding across the sterile, tile floor. 

“I want him dead, Dr. Gaul.” It’s the first words that fall from his lips. “Strung up from the tallest building we’ve got!” 

“I really shouldn’t be here.” Philo whispers, though he’s certain Coriolanus doesn’t truly mean it…surely. 

“Mr. Snow,” Dr. Gaul starts, but he continues, “Or fed to a mutt, or thrown in the Games himself. He’s wasted Capitol resources, he’s sabotaged work for the Hunger Games…he’s betrayed all of us and I want him dead .” 

“I spoke with President Ravinstill, and informed him of our ongoing investigation into Dr. Crane. He will only allow him to be sent off to the districts as a Peacekeeper.” 

Snow’s jaw rolls, his teeth gritting together. 

He wants to scream. 

“A Peacekeeper ?” 

“His work has been too good.” She quotes him. 

“The work he used your niece to achieve?” Coriolanus seethes. 

Snow wants his tongue cut out, at least, and be made an Avox. 

He wants to hang Dyess’ polished university diploma in the maid’s bathroom of his home with Livia, so Dyess could  have something to look at while scrubbing the toilet. 

Matters will need to be taken into Snow’s hands. 

As always. 

Everyone around him was always too gracious to get their hands dirty. 

“I have ordered two more autopsies for past cases of her’s that have failed, Mr. Snow.” Dr. Gaul says. “They should be concluded by next week and once the results are in, if it’s clear they’ve been tampered with, then we’ll have enough evidence to move forward.”

“And then what? He’s arrested and shipped off to the Districts? Going practically unpunished?” He asks, bitterly. 

“Oh, I have no doubt he won’t go unpunished.” She assures him, looking at him knowingly. “In fact, I believe he’s being punished now, and doesn’t even realize it, yet.” 

Coriolanus doesn’t know if she’s insinuating about her own ideas for his reprimanding, or if she somehow knows that he’s got the man’s wife strung out on him like a morphling addict. 

Perhaps it’s even a mix of the two.

“Be patient, Mr. Snow.” She assures him. “Winter is closer than you think…” 

…And Snow lands on top.

     The next few  days are a stressful blur, Gamemakers and Scientists alike scrambling to finish their deadlines and meetings, the next Games only a week away. 

In that time, Snow hadn’t acknowledged Tawny sending Philo for her work, and anytime she would try to go to his office to ask him things personally, or need his advice, he wasn’t there. 

She knew the Gamemakers were just as stressed — if not more — especially with the change of arena.

They were bending over backwards trying to make the Games the best they’ve had yet, and she appreciated and admired their work and effort. 

But she also needed her partner to help her — not his apprentice. 

“…Mr. Snow wanted me to ask you how your work is coming along?” Philo asks her as she checks the mutt’s vitals. 

It’s a rather large lizard, almost the size of an alligator, but not quite. 

Docile and calm — for now — thanks to its sedative. 

“If Mr. Snow wants to know, he can come find me.” She grits out, refusing to indulge anymore information. 

“I—Dr. Crane, I really need to know so I have something to tell him. I don’t want to anger him.” 

“He knows where my lab is, he knows where my office is, he knows where I live.” She grits out, not looking at him, still, while she watches the blue blood of the Lizard flow into the vacutainer. “If he wants to know so damn bad, he can come ask.” 

Once it hits its mark she pulls it from the dispenser and quickly clicks a new vacutainer to it for more than one blood sample. 

“Dr. Crane, he’s been quite stressed lately, and I really think he’d appreciate your cooperation.” Philo tries once more and she finally glares at him. 

“You tell Mr. Snow that if he wants my cooperation, he can come collect it himself.” She hisses. “Get out of my lab, now, please. I have to clean up.” 

Philo hesitantly steps back out, heart pounding in his as he goes back to Coriolanus’ office, waiting patiently for him to get out of his meeting. 

When he does, Snow offers him a somewhat friendly smile. 

“So, how is her subject?” He asks Philo, in a halfway decent mood, excited for his findings. 

“Umm…” He doesn’t quite know how to phrase it without angering Coriolanus. 

He knows he has a temper, and he doesn’t wish to see his blood boil through his porcelain skin or his jaw roll with his rage as he tries to keep from having a fit. 

“Dr. Crane didn’t give me any information, sir.” He confesses, swallowing nervously. 

His superior’s brows pull slightly. 

“Excuse me?” 

“She refuses to give me any information.” He repeats it, before scrambling out, “But I did see it, and it looked healthy and well, she was taking blood sampl—”

“—She refused you information?” He cuts him short, blue eyes growing irate. 

“I told her that you were far too busy to look for yourself, so you sent me to ask about it, and you’d really appreciate her cooperation…and she said that if you wanted her cooperation, that you would go collect it yourself.” 

“ Oh .” Snow says it lightly, despite the frustration itching at his skin. “Well, if you’ll excuse me, Mr. Marius, I have to go collect my own partner’s cooperation.” He offers a tight smile.

“Yes, of course.” Philo stands to his feet and bids him goodbye before scurrying down the hall as fast as he can. 

The moment he’s alone, Snow’s smile slips from his face, his fingers curling, shaking. 

Ungrateful, infuriating, vexing, woman , he thinks to himself as he grabs his coat and makes his way to her office. 

He can already imagine the many ways she’ll try to work her way out of it. 

Falling to her knees, reaching for his belt, whispering about how sorry she is and how she didn’t mean what she had said, kissing his neck, catching his lips with hers…

Perhaps she was so rude, so dismissive, so demanding of his attention because she wanted him to come find her. 

He assumes she’ll walk in, see him at her desk, and get breathless with her want. 

The idea angers him even further. 

If she’d wanted him at all this week, she should have just flagged him down and asked. 

He would not be manipulated with mind games, or pretty brown eyes, or soft moans that wisp from full lips. 

Getting up from her desk, he goes to hide behind the door at the sound of what he assumes are her steps growing closer, a heavy breath leaving her lips as she walks in. 

She nearly jumps from her skin when the door slams and locks, dark brown locks still pinned up from her time in her lab, eyes wide when she looks at him. 

“Oh.” She flatly speaks when she sees him, sighing relief. 

“ Oh ?” He asks, sharply, taking a step forward. 

“Your mole must have given you my message.” She says without looking at him as she walks to her desk and opens one of the drawers, fumbling through files. 

“Philo was only doing his job and you were unforgivably rude to him.” He sneers out. 

“ Unforgivably ?” Tawny questions with an amused scoff. “I do tend to shoot the messenger.” She admits. “Keep that in mind next time you go days without even acknowledging my existence.” She cuts next. 

“I’ve been doing my job, part of which is maintaining an eye on your job, and you’ve been acting like a child not getting her way.” He barks. 

“Because your eye hasn’t seen my work.” She states. “I’ve needed you , I’ve needed to speak to you, I’ve needed your opinion , your advice , you . So, I do apologize for being so unforgivably rude to Mr. Marius, but I wouldn’t have to be if you would just show up some time.” 

“Well now I’m good and shown up, Dr. Crane, so what exactly is it that you need ?” He throws out. 

She stares at him, taking in a deep breath before she’s sitting on the edge of her desk, reaching behind her to grab the new subject’s case file. 

Extending it to him, he steps closer, merely touching it before she’s snatching it away. 

His nostrils flare, knowing what game she’s playing. 

Any other time he’d want to entertain her, to see her splay out for him, craving him anyway she could get him. 

But right now it angers him more than anything. 

“I’m not doing this with you. Not right now.” He tells her. “Give me the damn file.” 

Reluctantly, she hands it over, watching his back as soon as he grabs it and turns to get space between them as he looks over her most recent notes. 

“So, it’s a success?” He questions, seeing that everything is running smoothly thus far. 

“It can’t technically be counted as one until the seven day mark.” 

“Which is…?”

“Three days.” 

“The Games are in a week from tomorrow. If it is a success and you’re chosen, that will barely be enough time to create more of them.” He mutters. 

“I don’t care if I’m chosen or not at this point, I just want to stop marking ‘time of death’ on my notes and what I believe the cause to be.” 

“Bare minimum.” It’s mumbled flatly, he’s tossing the file to her desk. 

“Is there anything else you need?” He asks her, half sarcastically, given that she’d thrown out a whole list of why she just had to see him. 

“That thing that you told Dyess was just a rumor,” She starts, Snow taking notice of  her swallowing thickly, slowly stepping to her, “about Ravinstill…is it truly just a rumor?” 

He stands over her. 

“It might not be.” He says quietly, raising his brows. “But what does it matter to you? You just want a successful case.”

She thinks a moment more, his eyes watching her as she does so. 

“My aunt said the only case left to be submitted for review is mine.” Tawny replies. “Are you being so patient because you like looking at me?” 

The self-doubt is written plainly on her face. 

“I don’t favor you.” He denies it, truthfully. “I admire your work, and I know you can…” He wants to gag on his next words, knowing she’d be more successful if not for her spineless husband, “…do better than what you have been the last year.” He explains. 

“Oh.” She almost whispers it, trying not to sound too relieved before saying, “I’m sorry I was rude to Philo. He always seems like a nervous wreck.” 

“I always seem to make him a nervous wreck.” Coriolanus scoffs.

“I can’t imagine how you’d ever make someone nervous.” She furrows her brows, lips pulling upward…another thought comes to mind. “Did you speak to Tigris?”

He pulls away from her at the mention of it, she wants to reach out and grab him to stop him, ask him to talk to her about it.

“She’s not going to tell anyone.” He says to her. 

“...She doesn’t think we’re horrible people does she?” 

He wants to laugh at her question, believing his cousin has long believed him to be a horrible person to some extent. 

“No, Dr. Crane, she doesn’t.” 

Tawny almost flinches at what he addresses her as. 

Things had changed since they’d been caught by his cousin – as if it made their affair palpable, real…neither of them had acknowledged it, however.

She wondered if guilt drilled at him, he wondered if she was falling in love with him. 

Both of them were repulsed by the thoughts but didn’t utter a word about it. 

“I have to get home.” She says next, breaking the small space of silence between them. 

“Me, too.” He replies, walking around her desk to grab his coat he’d rested on her chair. 

He notices the box on her desk, now, small and silver…the same box he had seen Dr. Gaul slip the syringe they had found in Dyess’ office into earlier in the week. 

“She said it’s an anniversary present.” Tawny tells him, noticing his eye caught on the package. “Apparently I’m not supposed to open it until after the Games.” 

Did this mean that Gaul had officially found enough evidence from those other autopsies? Was Dyess going to be dealt with after the Games? 

Coriolanus sneers at the idea of the man’s creations even being featured in the arena at all anymore.

The only reason his mutts even had a chance at being picked was because he ruined Tawny’s. 

Snow thinks back to Dyess’ smug comment.

Tawny’s gotten the pick of the litter, right, Snow?

Coriolanus looks at Tawny, who is now filing away the case he had looked over. 

He thinks of her driving herself mad trying to right the cases that she believes she did wrong, for the sake of the Games, to put on a good show, to help continue to prove a point to the Districts whose rebels stole her daughter away from her. 

Perhaps he’s gotten the pick of the litter…

“Everyone knows he’s the best Gamemaker we’ve got aside from Dr. Gaul. And Tawny gets him all to herself,” Dyess’ voice rings out in his mind, again.

No, Tawny didn’t have him all to herself…she has to share with Livia. 

Though he’s certain Tawny doesn’t mind sharing with his wife. 

The idea of him sharing with Dyess is a brand new issue that needs to be remedied, and if all bodes well with Dr. Gaul’s investigation, it will remedied quite soon.

“...Mr. Snow?” Tawny asks him again, his blue eyes coming back from being zoned out for a moment. “Were you needing something? I was about to leave, and I’ve got to lock up.” 

He can start the process of digging under Dyess’ skin furthermore the sooner Tawny’s subject is chosen as the third and final addition. 

“I do need something, actually.” He nods, slowly, a small smirk on his lips. “Come here.” He says to her, watching as she puts her stuff down and walks toward the desk, keeping it between the two of them. 

“Closer.” He tells her. 

“I have to go home, I can’t do this toni –” 

She hushes when his palm goes against her lips, fingertips gently holding at her face as he leans over her desk to be eye level with her. 

“I’m just looking .” He defends himself, unable to even get his mind on anything other than making sure they don’t fail so she can get picked. 

Her lips tug upward under his palm, and she nods a couple times before he removes his hand. “Now, Dr. Crane, would you mind showing me what you’ve been working on?”

Brown eyes nearly sparkle at his interest.

“Really?” She asks him. 

“So I can actually get my eye on it.” He replies, repeating her words and her small grin turns into a toothy smile. 

Her lips quickly press to his before she’s plucking the key to her lab out of her desk drawer. 

Before she shuts it, she places the gift from Gaul inside, and ice blue eyes watch it disappear into the polished wood, his mouth growing bitter at the memory of its content. 

[neversetyoufree]

I've been thinking a bit about why Noé resonates so much with me as an ace person, and I'm realizing that, in addition to the depiction of his actual romantic relationships/attraction, the way that Noé fits into Vnc's erotic blood drinking symbolism is extremely familiar.

Overall, when someone in VnC gets their blood drunk consensually, it tends to be portrayed as part of a sexual relationship. Vanitas, for example, is attracted to Jeanne, and one part of that attraction is that he wants her to drink his blood. The blood drinking itself feels good, and he enjoys it, but his desire to be bit is not the entirety of their relationship, and Jeanne's eventual attraction to him is much the same. She likes drinking his blood, but she also pretty explicitly says she wants to sleep with him. It's a part of the whole.

Or, to give a non-VaniJeanne example, when Veronica starts going into detail about her "fling" with Marquis Machina, Domi refers to it as Veronica talking about "her sex life." So while we don't see everything she says about the encounter, I think the fact of the joking censorship itself implies that Veronica's describing something more graphic than the blood drinking we do see in other scenes. Beyond the blood drinking itself and how it feels, the broader context of the act is portrayed as sexual (and often part of a sexual relationship).

And then we have Noé.

Unlike almost everyone else in the series, when Noé talks about his desire to drink blood, it is completely abstracted out of its sexual context. When he gets The Blood Talk from his teacher, he says that he likes drinking blood because it tastes good, and though he's grown into an adult since that point, his reasoning doesn't seem to have changed. The implications of Louis's "sweet talk" suggestion (you have to charm/seduce someone before they'll let you do this physical thing with them) go completely over his head even in the present.

Furthermore, when he does drink Domi's blood, he does so completely without the further sexual context shown elsewhere. Mochijun does not shy away from showing us when characters are attracted to one another (even when they're not couples), and though Noé's perhaps a bit more complicated, since we know he struggles to identify/understand the feelings of attraction he does have, it is never once suggested that he finds Dominique attractive.

Noé enjoys an act that is objectively a bit sexual (given the physical acts/sensations involved), and that clearly has an erotic context for others who do it, but he enjoys it for more or less non-sexual reasons. He's interested in something erotic because he enjoys the physical act (the taste) of it, and probably also the general closeness/connection, but he shows no sexual attraction to his partner.

And let me tell you, for more sex-favorable ace people, that whole previous paragraph has to sound pretty familiar. Because while blood drinking doesn't work as a 1:1 parallel to real world sex, given that actual sex also exists as a separate but related option for Vnc characters, "engaging in sex-acts without the need for sexual attraction" is just. what ace people do. And so to people familiar with that experience, Noé's whole weirdly non-sexual relationship to blood starts to feel extremely ace-coded.

Even with Vanitas, I'd be remiss if I didn't point out that Noé's relationship to wanting Vani's blood also really resonates with how some ace people do experience attraction. Because again, we're never given any particular indication that Noé finds Vanitas sexually attractive, or even particularly good looking. Even accounting for the fact that queer-coding might have to be subtler or the fact that Noé's bad at recognizing his feelings, it's just not there. I'd even argue that there's better evidence of Vanitas finding Noé attractive than vice versa.

Yet, despite all that, Noé really wants Vanitas's blood. Not only that, but he wants Vanitas's blood in a way that is inextricably tied to his desire to understand him as a person. He wants him because his blood smells good, and also because he wants to see his memories, and this intense desire for physical intimacy and understanding (completely absent of sexual attraction) works really well as a metaphor for what attraction can feel like as an ace person. The metaphor, again, isn't 1:1, and it doesn't apply to every kind of ace experience, but still. Here's a character who wants to do something erotic with someone he's not sexually attracted to, and he wants to do it because 1: he thinks he'll enjoy the physical act, and 2: he thinks it'll further his relationship with/help him better understand the other person involved.

That is a really good representation of why some ace people are drawn to sex within romantic relationships.

And while in any other case I'd insist that suggesting Mochijun's queercoding is an accident is a bit insulting, I honestly have no idea what to make of this. I have no clue how known/visible asexuality is among people in Japan, but I know that in my own experience with American media, intentionally ace-coded characters are incredibly rare, so I struggle to think that I might be so lucky as to find one in shonen manga of all places. At the same time though, vnc is a series filled with a lot of different kinds of queer coding (and occasionally straight-up queerness), so if anyone was going to do it, I suppose it would be Mochijun.

But intentional or not, it's really striking to me just how well Noé's relationship to blood works as a metaphor for being interested in sexual acts as an asexual person, which I think is why so many of us end up reading him and saying "hey same." Even if you don't sit down to unpack all the symbolism, his experience is just. familiar.

[folliesandfolderols]

Writing prompts day 48

From this prompt list. If you've read this far, I'm not sure you need any explanation, but the short version is I hadn't written any fiction since 2019, I set a goal to write at least 150 words/day in 2024, and this list was my way to restart. Also I abruptly decided on day 2 I would write an entire Tim/Damian story connecting all the prompts, because I am Good at Judging My Limits. /sarcasm Anyway, I finished the rough draft a while ago and am now unlocking the old entries as I edit.

Read from the beginning here, or on ao3 here

Days 42-47 here

***

52. "I want you to say my name like that again."

***

For a long moment, Tim sagged into Damian's embrace, trying to catch his breath. However unintentional it might have been, having Damian's arms around him again felt like—

It felt like—

He tried to latch onto the concept it reminded him of, and his brain skittered away from the thought like a mouse when someone flipped on the light.

Well, it didn't really matter what it felt like, because Damian stepped away and he would have fallen if he hadn't fully expected the loss of support. Damian would've loved to have made him lose his balance as much as he made him lose his cool. Tim took a deep breath and made sure his face was under control before he turned around to face him.

"Well?" he asked.

Damian hid his own expression by stooping to retrieve his washcloth from where he'd dropped to the floor. "Well, what?"

"Do you believe me, finally? Or do I have to keep proving myself to you?" For some reason, the question made his stomach flutter.

Damian sneered. "Oh, I believe you. You've never been that good of an actor. I'm beginning to think you're simply pathetically deprived and that's why you can't seem to keep your hands to yourself. For someone who's so eager to get me to spread my favors around, you certainly are restraining yourself from doing the same." He picked up the soap as well and started rubbing it on the washcloth.

Tim shrugged. "I often don't practice what I preach. It's kind of a common failing around here. I've always been pretty monogamous, and pretty bad at pinpointing when relationship dynamics shift, plus Bernard and I were together for a long time. But right now there's not really anyone."

Damian froze, so briefly that Tim nearly missed it, and then began washing himself again. "I fail to see why you think your dreary excuse for a romantic history should interest me."

Tim laughed out loud at that. "Because you asked, even if you didn't do so directly. I speak 'saving face' as one of my first languages. Everybody raised rich does." It had been one of the things that drove Stephanie nuts. She was solidly working-class and blunt by nature besides.

Damian flushed dull red up his torso. "Be that as it may, clearly this was a foolish indulgence on my part and misguided self-vindication on yours. We have nothing in common."

"We at least have extreme sexual compatibility," Tim pointed out. "That's not as frequent an occurrence as you might think. And we must have other stuff in common too or we wouldn't both be here right now."

As if the words shattered the wall of Damian's usual reserve, his face twisted in clear bewilderment. "Then what are you saying? What do you want from me? I cannot comprehend the purpose of you leaving for months to avoid me and then returning to insist that yes, you did enjoy our time together, and I should have divined the truth of the situation though all evidence pointed to the contrary. If you're not lying, then what was the point?"

Tim struggled for the correct words. Not easy when he wasn't sure of the answer himself. He wanted to be right, and he wanted Damian to believe him, and he wanted to pull him into bed again right now, and he wanted to—

Basically, it kind of sounded, even in his own head, like he just wanted to jerk Damian around.

"I'm such an asshole," he said, voice shaky in his ears.

"Well, there's another point in the argument for our compatibility," Damian replied, but Tim didn't really process the words.

"I, um, I should go." He spun on his heel so quickly he nearly lost his balance and pushed the door open. That bizarre phantom pain was back again, radiating in spikes from his chest into each individual finger. He clutched one hand to his ribs, trying to press against the hurt.

Damian's voice followed him back to his own shower, which he hadn't realized he'd left running all this time. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. You love to run away when someone points out your flagrant inconsistencies."

Tim knew he shouldn't answer, but he couldn't have Damian thinking it was somehow his own fault that Tim was a gross example of a human being. The hollowness in his stomach echoed through his words. "I'm trying to protect you. From me. I'm not . . . I haven't been a very good person, with you, lately." He scrubbed shower gel haphazardly across his body, trying to get through it as quickly as possible. "I'm really sorry." The apology didn't carry its usual burn. Probably because so many of his recent interactions with Damian had involved him expressing his regret.

Damian wrenched open the door and glowered at him, dressed in joggers and nothing else. "What did I say about using the paltry excuse of protecting someone who risks his life nightly from your feeble attempts at whatever the hell you think you're doing? Engage in whatever behavior suits you, but don't blame my fragility for it."

"I don't know what I want!" Tim exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "But I do know I don't want to make you pay the price for my indecision. So I'm just trying to get out of your sight. I would've thought you'd want that." He turned just enough to rotate the faucet off, then reached past Damian for the towel on the hook outside the door. He dried off quickly and wrapped it around his waist, noting with clinical detachment the quivering in his fingers. That was usually a sign that he'd pushed himself too far. In this case, though, he thought maybe it was a response to the agony vibrating through his cells. What the fuck was wrong with him? Maybe he should go see Leslie Thompkins?

Damian spoke over the deafening volume of his thoughts. "Don't presume to understand the things I want. Your deductive powers clearly aren't up to the task."

Tim paused in the act of rifling through his clothes one-handed, trying to find his underwear. "If they're not . . . do you want to tell me?" he asked.

Damian didn't answer for so long that Tim gave up waiting, finally finding his boxer briefs and pulling them on under his towel. He already felt exposed enough.

He dressed fully, sat down, and was lacing up his shoes when Damian broke his silence. "I am not certain of everything I want. But. Sometimes, I remember when I—that last night, the last time we slept together before you made your wish for detachment clear." His blush had returned, but he soldiered on with no other sign of embarrassment. "Do you recall?"

Tim flashed back to Damian's hands holding his hips still, his tongue working its way inside Tim while he writhed and begged for release. He flushed hot. "Yeah. It was pretty memorable."

"For me as well." Damian took a deep breath. "I want you to say my name like that again. That's one thing I know without any doubt whatsoever."

Sudden tears stung the corners of Tim's eyes. He pressed the heels of his hands to them, trying to get himself under control, and when he dropped his arms once more, Damian was gone.

days 49 and 50 here

[lenievi]

reading about the confirmation bias and thinking about how fandoms and shipping and fandom fave/hated characters work is actually quite interesting

[randomjreader]

Thank you @azfellco for explaining to me the situation

Honestly, if you want my opinion? I think this whole thing is so stupid, because how is it that after all these months Kit STILL has queerbaiting allegations??

First of all, STOP. ASSUMING. KIT'S (OR ANYONE'S). SEXUALITY. PLEASE. How many more times must the poor guy say that he's comfortable with his own sexuality and just doesn't want to disclose it to the public for personal reasons for people to LEAVE HIM ALONE. Like my god, how can someone watch a show like heartstopper then immediately start contributing to this toxic culture of forcing people out of the closet for your own selfish reasons? There's literally a whole storyline of how badly affected Charlie Spring was after being outed, but that CLEARLY flew over their heads for some reason. It's ridiculous. We're not his friends. We're not his family. We. Are. Just. Fans. We are entitled to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about his personal life.

Secondly, if for all those who are just so insistent that Kit just HAS to be straight because he held hands with someone of the opposite sex, and therefore should not be playing a queer character, do you even hear yourselves? I've already spoken in depth about my views on straight actors playing queer characters, my general message being that I think it's completely fine so long as they have been handling it respectfully and giving the community the respect it deserves, something I believe Kit has done wonderfully. But more than that, what's up with this weird assumption that someone is definitely heterosexual if they are in a heterosexual relationship??? There is more to sexuality than gay or straight. Take Maia for example. She is openly part of the LGBTQ community, so are y'all going to tell her she's straight and has been lying the whole time, simply because of that few second clip? I DIDN'T THINK SO. This is literally just promoting bi erasure, pan erasure, erasure of any sexuality that isn't simply attracted to the same sex (AND ON BISEXUAL VISIBILITY MONTH TOO???). Once again, how did you watch heartstopper, hear nick nelson say "I still like girls, but I like boys too." AND THEN GO AND DO THIS. I'm convinced some of these people just didn't watch the show and became fans through tiktok edits or something.

Finally, say that they are dating. So what? How does Kit and Maia's personal relationship affect Kit's job as an actor in heartstopper in any way shape or form? Were these people expecting Joe and Kit to get married or something? Or for neither of them to be in relationships with other people ever? I know that they're both the perfect portrayals of Nick and Charlie, but at the end of the day THESE ARE CHARACTERS THAT THEY ARE PLAYING. None of the relationships in shows or movies, romantic especially, need to be translated to real life for us to enjoy the work. If you're that type of person, then by that logic Kit and Maia are technically bringing on screen romance off screen, since they're starring in ACGGTTAT together. Seriously, you can't expect actors to bring every single romantic relationship they portray on screen into real life, that's entirely unrealistic. Also, while I understand the curiosity behind our faves' relationship statuses, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't guilty of that, at the end of the day it's really none of our business (going back to the point of how we are just fans and are owed nothing by public figures). If they're dating, that's great, I'm happy for them. If they're not? Also cool, we love to see a wholesome friendship. Speculate if you must, but don't go digging around the internet for evidence or god forbid, start harassing Kit or Maia about this. Just keep your theories to yourself or at most talk about it casually in a little chat with friends or something. Let's not blow this up into a huge thing and just let them be yeah?

So that's my two cents on this whole situation. Dating or not, I can't wait to see them both in ACGGTTAT, and ofc, I can't wait for season 2 of heartstopper <3

[nethercomfies]

🌼 Someone you like 🌼

Alright, you guys convinced me, here we go with demisexual Albedo hehe 👀

Pairing: Albedo x gn! reader

Content: Demisexual Albedo, Fluff, a bit of angst (mainly related to the demisexuality) with comfort (and acceptance), love confessions, getting together; things get a little steamy towards the end (making out, grinding against each other while fully clothed, the focus being more on being close to each other rather than pleasure; Albedo being a bit inexperienced). I’ll put a divider before that, mainly for any fellow aces who just want to read a bit of comfort without steamy stuff.

Note: Sorry in advance for all the indented spaces, but with Tumblr's new formatting, this is currently the only way I can think of to have proper paragraph breaks ;; Edit: Nvm Tumblr removed them.

Word count: 2.5k

INFO: Demisexuality means that someone won’t feel sexually attracted to another person unless they’ve previously formed an emotional bond with that person. Just like asexuality in general, this is a spectrum, so some demisexuals may develop that sort of attraction very fast after a bond is formed, while for others it can take longer and only happens with very few people.

Important: This blog is meant to be a positive space, so I will just put a very general warning here that I won’t tolerate any kind of aphobia. If you have nothing nice to say, just leave, because I don’t want you here.

Anyway, this is for my fellow aspec people: You’re loved and valid, and there is nothing wrong with you. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!

As far as Albedo is concerned, he just wasn’t created to form any romantic or sexual relationships, and that’s fine with him —  They’re too much of a hassle to keep up with anyway, so his lack of these feelings just means that he has more time to dedicate to his research. He never thought about it much more beyond that. If anyone asks, he’ll always tell them that he’s fine by himself. He doesn’t need anyone else, so he won’t waste his time on relationships.

That stance changes after meeting you. Slowly but surely you carve out your own space in his life until it becomes impossible for Albedo to deny that there is something special about you. It just seems like everything fits together perfectly —  You’re easy to talk to, give Albedo space when he needs it and listen to him, even when you don’t fully understand what he’s going on about. Somehow, that friendship between you two is so much easier than any other relationship Albedo has ever had, and so, he grows quite fond of you. Before he knows it, your friendship develops into something else, although he can’t quite put his finger on it for the longest time.

It’s clear for everyone else, long before he finally figures it out himself.

Kaeya and Lisa seem to enjoy nothing more than teasing him about his “crush”, Timaeus and Sucrose seem almost confused whenever they see Albedo without you, and even Klee seems to just see you as a part of their family by now.

All the evidence points towards one clear solution: He’s fallen in love with you.

For the first time in his life, Albedo finds himself understanding what the romance novels he reads from time to time are talking about —  The way his heart beats faster when you smile at him, the way his thoughts keep wandering to you, the way he just wants to be in your presence. It’s an unfamiliar feeling, but he doesn’t mind it in the slightest.

Another thing he knows from his romance novels is that the next logical step is to tell you about his feelings and hope you’ll reciprocate. He’s pretty sure you would. Now that he pays more attention to the signs, it’s quite clear that you seem to be just as fond of him as he is of you, so it really shouldn’t be a problem —  If it weren’t for one rather pressing obstacle: He still feels no sexual attraction to you.

He’s read about it countless times. The burning flames of passion that only grow stronger when one is near the person they’re interested in. The deep desire to feel the other in the most intimate ways. He often overhears some of the other knights talk about it, too. Some of them talk about how much they desire their partners, while others even feel that way about complete strangers.

It never made sense to Albedo, and it doesn’t make any more sense with his newfound romantic attraction to you, even though all the books make it seem like the two are closely related to each other.

Sure, he wants to be close to you… But all he desires is to just feel your hand in his or hold you in his arms. Maybe he’d like to share an innocent kiss with you every once in a while —  But that’s as far as it goes for him.

It sits at the back of his mind, driving him insane. Maybe he misread the signs and he just likes you as a friend after all —  But his heart never beats that fast when he’s around Timaeus or Sucrose, for example, and he certainly wouldn’t want to hold either of them close.

No, the way he feels about you is different, and he’s convinced what he feels really is love. So, what is he missing? And, more importantly… Would you even want to be with him if he can’t provide something that appears to be such a major part of relationships?

It doesn’t take long for you to realize that something has changed between you and Albedo. One day you were getting along great, and you finally felt like he might actually reciprocate your feelings… The next he seems to be avoiding you like the plague completely out of the blue.

You’ve already tried asking around, but came up with nothing —  From what you’ve been told so far, Albedo is acting like his usual self around everyone else, he’s not busy with any important research, and if you upset him somehow, he hasn’t mentioned it to anyone.

Normally you’d just give him a bit of space and leave it be, but with how sudden that change was, you can’t help but feel worried. So, after a week with no changes, you finally decide to try and confront him about it, hoping that you’ll be able to somehow fix whatever is wrong.

Albedo is in the process of discussing something with Timaeus when he spots you from afar. You see his eyes widening for a moment before he mumbles a quick goodbye to his student and takes off —  But you’re not going to let him get off so easily this time.

You run after him, and once you get within earshot, try to call out to him. “Albedo, wait! Can we please talk? Just for a moment?”

You see him let out a sigh, but he eventually stops in his tracks, turning around to you. You come to a halt next to him, giving him a concerned frown. “Is there something wrong? I’ve been worried about you.”

He tries to look surprised at your words, but by the look in his eyes, you can tell he knows exactly what you’re talking about. “No, not at all… Why were you worried? I’m doing quite alright.”

You cross your arms. “It doesn’t take a genius to figure out you’ve been avoiding me, you know?” A hint of regret flashes across his face, so you soften your tone a little, reaching out a hand to gently brush his arm. “If I did anything to upset you, I’m sorry. I can assure you, it wasn’t my intention. But… If you could just tell me what I did, maybe we can work this out somehow? I really wouldn’t want to lose you. Not after we’ve been getting along so well.”

Albedo quickly shakes his head. “No, no, you didn’t upset me… I’m sorry if I worried you. There were some things I had to sort out, but I now realize that avoiding you wasn’t the best solution.” He glances over at you, only to see your confused expression. With a sigh, Albedo reaches out to gently hold your hand, lightly squeezing it. “Y/n, I’ve recently been dealing with a lot of… Unfamiliar feelings. Mostly revolving around you. I should have just said something, but…” He trails off, averting his gaze.

Your eyes widen at his confession before a smile finds its way to your lips. Now you get why he was avoiding you —  For someone who never experienced these feelings before, it must have been quite confusing. “I think I understand now. Albedo… I feel that way about you as well.” You gently squeeze his hand back, hoping that knowing you feel the same way will help him relax as well. A feeling of giddiness rushes over you. This isn’t exactly how you imagined your big confession to happen, but the outcome seems to be the same, so it doesn’t matter —  You’re happy either way.

Albedo, on the other hand, doesn’t seem too thrilled. Quite the opposite, actually. Suddenly, the air feels heavy around the two of you. “I’m glad you feel that way, I really do, but…” He hesitates before taking a deep, slightly shaky breath, “I’m not sure we could really be together.”

You frown, stepping closer to lay a hand on his shoulder. “Why not? What’s wrong?” You ask, keeping your tone as gentle as possible. The last thing you want now is to scare him away.

Albedo seems reluctant, a slight blush on his face. “I do love you, but… I’m afraid I don’t feel any… Sexual attraction to you. Isn’t that important to human relationships? It seems to be important to everyone else…” His voice is barely more than a quiet mumble, but luckily you’re close enough to understand him.

You lay a hand on his cheek, softly smiling at him. “If that’s all you’re worried about, I can assure you, it’s alright.” Carefully you pull Albedo into your arms, holding him close as he melts into your embrace. “I love you, and as long as we’re together, that’s all I could ever ask for. Anything beyond that is just a bonus that I can do without,” you assure him.

You feel his arms close around you, holding you tight as Albedo’s face is buried against your chest. “Are you sure? I bet there are other people who could-”

You quickly shake your head, gently stroking his hair as you cut him off. “That doesn’t matter to me. I want to be with you, Albedo. Other people don’t interest me. So please, don’t even worry about that… Alright?”

The tension leaves Albedo’s body at your words, and you can feel him relax against you. 

“Well, if that’s the case… I’ll gladly be with you.” When he looks up at you again, you finally see the soft smile on his face you were hoping for earlier as he leans in to leave a small kiss on your cheek.

Being with you is easy. It’s natural, like things were always meant to be this way. And it’s certainly not the huge hassle Albedo always expected it to be. He’s happy with the way things are between you two, and you are as well —  You make sure to frequently remind him of that, never wanting him to feel like he’s not enough for you.

Albedo’s favorite thing is how with you, he can just be himself. He doesn’t need to always rely on himself, and he doesn’t need to lock his feelings away. (He couldn’t even if he tried —  Somehow, you can always tell how he’s feeling.) And so, for possibly the first time in his life, Albedo allows himself to feel —  Happiness, sadness, and everything in between.

You’re always there, ready to laugh with him, offer comfort when he’s sad and convince him to rest when he’s tired. To be known so thoroughly by another human being… It’s strange, but ultimately Albedo decides that he likes this bond between you.

It’s one night after Albedo returns from a longer stay up on Dragonspine when the attraction sets in. It hits him out of nowhere with such an intensity that it’s impossible to ignore.

You’re snuggled up to Albedo, your arms tightly wrapped around him and resting your head on his chest, listening to the steady thumping of his heartbeat. Over and over again you lift your head and shift to cup Albedo’s cheeks before leaning in to leave small kisses all over his face. Albedo lies there with a soft smile as he keeps his eyes closed, taking note of the little pattern you’re following… A kiss on the forehead, one on his temple, on his nose, his cheek, and then… His hand grazes your skin as your lips meet his, keeping you in place to steal a few more kisses from you. He allows them to hold a bit more urgency than usual, quickly letting them grow into more than just innocent kisses.

You softly smile against his lips, your body acting on its own as you carefully press yourself against him, resting a hand against Albedo’s chest, and- You cut yourself off before you get too carried away, heat rising to your cheeks.

It’s not often that the two of you make out, and usually, Albedo puts a stop to it when it gets too much —  So you always want to make sure not to overwhelm him and that he gets a chance to say something if he doesn’t want to continue. You don’t mind it when he does, usually just opting to cuddle with him instead, and making sure he knows it’s okay.

But tonight, Albedo doesn’t stop you. He just gently runs a hand down your back, letting it rest on your hip. “Would you like to continue this?” He asks sheepishly, his thumb mindlessly tracing the sliver of exposed skin from where your shirt slightly rode up during the kissing.

“Are you sure? You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, you know?” You remind him, gently cupping his cheek.

Albedo nods. “I know that. But right now… I’d just like to feel as close to you as I possibly can. I enjoy this, so if you want to go on, we can.”

So you shift to sit on his lap, your legs spread on either side of his hips, and as you lean in to kiss him once again, you can feel a slight hardness pressing against you. You give an experimental roll of your hips against his, hearing how Albedo lets out a shaky breath in response.

“Any time you want to stop, just tell me.” You whisper, peppering kisses across his face.

Albedo just nods, wrapping his arms tightly around you as he buries his face against your neck, leaving small kisses all over your skin. He responds to the rolling of your hips by pressing himself up against you as well, and soon enough you can feel the hardness growing against you. His arms slip down towards your waist and he slips them under your shirt, just letting his hands rest on your hips, feeling the warmth of your skin.

You hold him in your arms as well, pressing kisses wherever you can reach while letting out small whimpers against his skin, mixed in with Albedo’s quiet moans.

You keep grinding against each other like that until you eventually fall apart in each other’s arms whilst breathlessly declaring your love for each other.

Albedo holds you in his arms, tracing small patterns on your back as he catches his breath. Your head is resting on his chest, listening to his heartbeat once again while one of your hands is still tangled in his hair, gently caressing it.

“I really enjoyed that,” Albedo admits after a while, gently kissing the top of your head.

You hum in agreement, softly smiling. “Yeah. I’m glad you liked it as well.”

Albedo nods, hugging you tightly. “You know, I think… If it’s always like this… If we can always be that close to each other… I feel like we can do this more often.”

You prop your chin on one of your arms, using the other to cup Albedo’s cheek. “As long as you’re comfortable, I’d like that a lot. Just remember, you don’t need to rush into anything. If we do this, I want to make sure it’s enjoyable for both of us.”

“I’m sure it will be,” Albedo says, pulling you into a tight embrace once again.

[another-stark-sub]

“Are you in love with him?” - Tony Stark Imagine

Notes: I wrote and editted this in two hours instead of going over my notes. Was gonna be spicy fluffy but it just turned into fluffy, and one of the lines/paragraphs (smth like that i dont remember how long that segment was) is based on/inspired by a fanfic on ao3 I bookmarked. I think it’s debt-free, but I could be wrong.  Anyway, I hope you enjoy, and I’m so sorry im not on here more oftennnnn

- - -

“Of course I am. He’s Tony Stark.” You sighed, a weight finally lifted off your chest. “Who isn’t in love with him?”

Bruce blinked a few times, the confusion evident on his face. “Then, why don’t you tell him?”

You scoffed. These geniuses think they know everything, but they couldn’t see what was glaringly obvious to you. “He’s Tony Stark.”

The perplexed expression didn’t disappear from your friend’s expression. So, you explained further, “It’s already a privilege, beyond that really, to be talking to you, to any Avenger. To work with any of you is an honor, and to be friends with you” -you laughed- “it shouldn’t even be possible for someone like me.”

“Don’t say that. You’re amazing, too.” 

You tried to find any tick, any clue that he was lying. But Bruce seemed to really believe this. “I know I’m amazing.” You shrugged. “I’m great. I love and I care deeply, and I have a stable job. I have a place for myself, and I take care of myself.” You clicked your tongue. “However, you all, all  you Avengers… Forget out of my league, more like off planet.

“And Tony? He said it himself. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Add superhero, figurehead, public figure, ex-CEO, and savior of the universe. Bruce, I have confidence in myself, but Tony is something else entirely. No one is worthy of him or his affections unless they’re a god or another Avenger.”

It was hard to keep up with the statistical analysis you were trying to run. The literal one on your hologram and the one keeping your view of Tony in check. So, defeated, you sighed and leaned back in your chair. 

Bruce closed his own work and stood across the lab bench. “Weirdly enough, I’m sure none of us Avengers think that way.” After a few taps of his pen against his palm, he added, “Aren’t there fans making posts about you, too? Tony showed me the, uh, Instagram videos.”

You laughed. “Fan edits don’t make an Avenger. Saving the world does.”

He shrugged. “You help us save the world.”

“From inside Avengers Tower on a computer.” You took a deep breath. “Look, Bruce, I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But, I’m not telling him.” You shrugged and brought your statistical analysis back up.

You knew your own worth. You were worthy of an amazing partner and person. Tony Stark, though, was easy beyond that. You had accepted it soon after you realized your own feelings, and while they haven’t dwindled, you knew it was for the best. 

~ - ~

Tony had never resorted to this before. It was never a question of his ability to code. In the past, it was because he didn’t need a program or an AI to do it for him. He could always tell if someone was into him. He knew when Pepper was into him. The moment Rhodey gazed at him back in their MIT days. Every single reporter and heiress and model he slept with, he knew when their thoughts turned sexual or romantic. 

You, though. With you, he couldn’t fucking tell, and he knew it was because of his own feelings. Tony felt intensely for people before. Pepper, Rhodey, that one reporter all those years ago. However, with you, it wasn’t just that fluttery feeling in his gut or the immediate smile he can’t seem to stop when he sees you. It was the comfort he felt when he heard your voice or the softness he could feel in his heart when he saw a picture of you. 

It was like his entire life was full of panic, never resting, never stopping. But when you entered his life with a gentle smile and a quick wit, it felt like he could finally breathe. 

It was addicting. 

“Sir, I have the calculations.”

“Hit me.”

“Speech diagnostics of you and of Ms. (Y/l/n) are similar. Whenever you speak of her, 79.4% is positive and 18.8% is neutral. Ms. (Y/l/n) has  78.9% positive and 17.2% neutral dialogue regarding you. When she speaks of you, her heartrate increases by 4.6%, and similarly, yours increases by 4.1%. When speaking to each other, heartrate initially increases by 7%.”

Tony nodded. “How does this compare to other Avengers? I gush about Banner like a teenager.”

“Well, sir, while you and Ms. (Y/l/n) have high positive dialogue about other Avengers, all of them have at least a 10% decrease compared to each other. And heartrate varies depending on the topic of conversation.”

Tony snapped his fingers. “Am I excluding all non-super friends? Include any agents, co-workers. Pep isn’t an Avenger after all.”

Friday took two seconds and responded. “You and Ms. (Y/l/n) have a significant difference in speech diagnostics when talking about or to each other compared to any other Avenger, co-worker, and friend.”

When Tony remained quiet, Friday added, “Do you want me to repeat the results?”

“You don’t need to, Friday.”

“But you’re not doing anything with the new information. Would you like me to save these findings?”

“Friday,” Tony warned. 

There was silence as the love-wrecked scientist pressed his fist between his brows. Data and cold hard facts said yes, but was it right?

“Sir?”

“Yes, Fri?”

“Would you like me to play examples for you?”

He blinked. “Examples?”

“Yes. Of you and her talking about each other positively.”

It was an invasion of privacy. Tony shouldn’t. 

“Play examples.”

Before his rational mind could tell Friday no. 

“Are you in love with him?”

Tony’s eyes widened. This was too private. It might not even be about him.”Friday-”

“Of course I am.”

“-stop playback.”

“He’s Tony Sta-”

“Playback stopped.”

Tony scrambled. “What? No, wait, go back. Play it.” Screw rational. You knew he was a narcissist. You wouldn’t expect him to hear that and stop. 

“He’s Tony Stark. Who isn’t in love with him?”

“Then, why don’t you tell him?”

“... He’s Tony Stark.”

Tony started to fiddle with something on his desk. “What does that mean?”

Friday answered, “Dr. Banner asked her if she loved you, and she said yes. This means that she’s in love with you.”

Why did he program Friday like this? “I know that. I mean, those two lines. Why does me being Tony Stark stop her from saying something?” Was it the attention? Did you want some sort of normal life away from cameras and international gossip? Maybe it was the Avenging. Having a partner who was always out risking death wasn’t ideal. 

Sure, you could be in love with him. But you couldn’t be with him. 

“Maybe you should ask her.”

There were celebrities who were able to live normal lives. Some paid to have prosthetics for going outside of moved to a remote country to get out of the spotlight. He thrived off attention, but he could give that up. Avenging, he couldn’t give that up, but maybe he could cut back. Take a mission a month instead of one a week. Or maybe take more digital missions. He wasn’t just Iron Man after all. He was a genius, could hack into the Pentagon if he really wanted to. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Maybe I could talk to her.”

~ - ~

The moment you put your bag down on your lab table, Tony said, “You’re gonna be mad.”

You narrowed your brows. “What did you do?” You pressed your palm to your chest. “Oh my god, Peter overwrote my data, didn’t he? Ugh, I know he said he’s great at managing holograms, but really, Tone, you should’ve given him a tutorial before giving him access.” You brought up your holograms to check your data and analysis. 

“That’s not it.” Tony stood next to you as you looked through your files. “I did something that invaded your privacy.”

You tilted your head. Closing the holograms, you took a deep breath and slowly asked, “How?”

Tony flashed an embarrassed grin before sighing. “You’re gonna be shocked, too, so prepare yourself.”

You did not know where this was going at all. What horrible thing could Tony have done? Steeling yourself, you took a deep breath and nodded at him to continue. 

Tony cleared his throat. “Usually, I can tell when someone has feelings for me. People are obvious about it, but you? You aren’t. So, I had Friday do some analysis on our speech patterns. Me, being in love with you, was one of my controls. You and your dialogue regarding me was the main variable. 

“Long story short, I accessed some audio of you and Bruce talking, and you said that you loved me but could never tell me.” He glanced at you. “So that’s why I need to apologize.” 

Your expression didn’t change. No, that wasn’t it. You, at first, looked confused. Now, there was just nothing. No expression. No wrinkled brow in anger of flushed cheeks in embarrassment. Nothing. 

Tony blinked. “You can shout at me now. If you were confused about when to shout at me.”

You licked your lips before taking a deep breath. “Ok, that was a lot.” You pursed your lips then opened it. But, you couldn’t really think of anything to say. You didn’t even know how to feel. “So you know that I” -you pointed at yourself and then at him- “and that I didn’t wanna tell you.” You shook your head. “Wait, do you know why I didn’t want to tell you?”

A broken scoff left Tony’s lips. “Yeah. I’m a mess.”

It was your turn to scoff. “Wait, you’re a mess? That’s why you think I don’t want to tell you?”

“Among other reasons?”

Other reasons? 

You crossed your arms. “Ok, what other reasons?”

Tony looked offended. Still, he listed, “I’m surrounded by cameras, and everyone wants some privacy. Can’t get it if you’re with me. Then, there’s the Iron Man of it all. I went into a wormhole with a nuke. That was also all over the news. Then, there’s the whole daddy issues thing. I’m working on it, but it takes a while-”

He rambled on and on, listing reason after reason, and with each one, you felt tears well up in your eyes. It was a weird mix of heartbreaking, confusing, and enraging. The emotions built up slowly with each word that left his mouth, overwhelming you to the point that you couldn’t even say how it happened. 

But, as Tony paced and talked so horribly about himself, you somehow ended up in front of him with your hands on his cheeks. 

You only realized it when Tony stopped talking and when his breath touched your lips. “What?” he asked. 

You didn’t answer. You kissed him instead. 

It was a hard press of  your lips against his. It was short, and it wasn’t much. 

But by the way Tony gripped the back of your neck and pulled you back for another kiss, you’d think it was his first kiss. You knew it wasn’t. Not just because you knew he had kissed all sorts of people before you, but because he somehow knew how to make you gasp and melt into him. 

While one hand kept you steady, the other trailed down your back and pulled you closer to him. His lips moved fluidly against yours, pushing and pulling, and everytime he moved back, you chased his lips to continue the kiss, because the softness, the passion, the fact it was finally happening, was all too good. You didn’t want it to stop.

Your hands started to move. For someone so rich, his t-shirt was rough when you twisted it between your fingers and pulled it to you. Slowly, you trailed your fingers along the side of his neck. You rubbed your thumb along his pulse point, a reminder that this was indeed real. You were kissing Tony Stark, and- He was pulling away again.

Desperate, you leaned forward, reached around to hold onto his shoulder, and kissed the side of his neck. 

He let out a breathy laugh, and before you could suck on his skin, his stubble scratched your cheek. 

You looked up at him and giggled when his nose bumped into yours. When your giggles turned into a smile, he kissed you again, a soft and short kiss, before leaning his forehead against yours. 

His thumbs rubbed circles into your waist as you lightly scratched the back of his neck. He didn’t say anything. In fact, he seemed busy gazing at you.

“Speechless, Stark?” you teased. 

He laughed. For a few seconds, he just gazed at you, seeming to prove your point. Tony’s hand began to wander, from stroking your cheek to pushing back your hair. “More confused.”

Remembering why you interrupted him, you brought your hands to his cheeks again and held him there so he couldn’t look away from you. “You are amazing, Tony. That’s the reason I didn’t want to tell you.” You shrugged. “You’re too good for me.”

His fidgeting stopped. “Well, that’s not true.”

“Tony, you’re an Avenger.”

“Technically, you are also an Avenger.”

“You’re a genius.”

“Who can’t cook scrambled eggs.”

“You literally saved the universe.”

“After producing weapons of mass destruction for decades.”

You glared at him. 

He glared back. Then, he fought back. “I don’t plan on retiring.”

“Wouldn’t want you to.”

“I have severe PTSD, anxiety, maybe ADHD, all mixed with trauma galore.”

“And I will learn to help you.”

“I couldn’t give you a normal life.”

“I’d rather have you anyway.”

He opened his mouth, but you instead told him, “I’d rather have you than anything. As long as, well, for as long as  you’ll have me.”

He raised his eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

“Positive.”

Tony shook his head with a smile. “Cause, I’d rather have you for, well, how does til you get tired of me sound?”

You laughed. “Won’t happen. But, sure.” You kissed him again.You would’ve kept going, but there was something to settle first.  “By the way, Tony?”

“Yeah?”

“Is Friday recording right now?”

“Friday records everything. It’s in the contract.”

Friday added, “I record everything that happens in the tower.”

“Ok.” You could work with that. “I’ll forgive you for the invasion of privacy.”

Tony beamed, and you couldn’t help your own smile when he did. Still, you continued, “On one condition.” Your own smile turned devious. “I want evidence that Star Spangled Banner took my ice cream.”

Tony burst out laughing. He kissed you again, a deep kiss, and when he was done, he mumbled, “God, I love you,” against your lips.

[copperbadge]

pagemelt on tiktok did a 2-part video on Stealing Harry! how does it feel knowing how deeply important that fic is to so many people?

As many of you know I am a Fandom Old, and never has there been a moment where I felt older than when I was trying to get onto TikTok to see these videos. Oh man I am so old. But what lovely and thoughtful tiktoks those were! Just truly delightful and a lot to consider.

For those of you who are curious and/or very new to tiktok as I am, here are the videos:

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRMAErfP/

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRMAt3df/

Hopefully those will load in browser, but I can't make promises. Anyway, I had many thoughts but I'm not really a video guy, so I wrote this here and I'm going to drop a link to Pagemelt and hopefully she will see it!

I have a lot of feelings, most of the time, surrounding Stealing Harry; as odd as it is to say it really was a defining moment in my life, though I didn't see that for many years.

In terms of being influential or meaningful to others, of course I'm extremely proud and touched, and so glad I could offer such positivity. Writers do their craft for a lot of reasons, but I've always wanted to write in order to interact with others -- to touch people or teach people or offer them my opinion, although this wasn't as consciously vocalized when I was younger. To have written something with the impact of Stealing Harry, especially at the age of 24, was a real accomplishment for me, but the kind that is mainly seen looking back -- it's the kind of feeling that comes of years of compilation, for lack of a better word, of conversations with others about the work. At the time it was very popular and that felt extremely good, of course, but I didn't understand why.

In some ways I still don't -- I also have a lot of bafflement when it comes to the story, because why THAT story, at THAT moment, and still today? I've had guesses before -- people love a kidfic, and there's plenty of romance and sex, and much of the fic is a sort of emotional hurt/comfort -- but I do feel as though Pagemelt put her finger on something in that regard which I hadn't fully considered.

Her take on Stealing Harry is extremely cogent and thoughtful, particularly since she's looking back at the fic as a reader and really thinking about the experience. Like, bisexual representation that wasn't stigmatized was really important for her, and I think perhaps both Remus being secure in his love as a gay man and Sirius being truly uncertain about his sexuality as someone who has had romantic/sexual relationships with women and strong feelings for men really spoke to people. Struggling with identity or with knowing your identity but feeling attacked for it, and also wanting that security in identity, I can see how the adult relationships in Stealing Harry could speak to people. I'm so very glad they have.

I also think she were spot-on about her discussion of some of the flaws in the story. It WAS written fifteen years ago and the environment in fandom was different. Certainly I love to write a strong redemption arc, so I would have added more nuance to Snape's had I had the reading of Half Blood Prince beforehand, but I think I still would have written it. That said, she's not wrong that there was a strong shift in fandom attitudes towards Snape based on HBP, though it took a few years after the end of the series, at least in my experience, for that to arrive.

I hadn't really thought about the name issues, with Tonks; she was definitely read as queercoded even at the time she first appeared in canon, but specifically trans-coded readings for Tonks weren't as visible and trans headcanons for characters in general, while I'm sure they existed, weren't vocalized as much, for perhaps self-evident reasons given how much transness was respected (or rather, not respected) in fandom at the time. People not always respecting Tonks' name in Stealing Harry does land differently today. It's something I, to my dismay, wouldn't have consciously thought of if I were writing the story today, the idea that respecting Tonks' chosen name was an important gesture to trans readers, so I appreciate having that pointed out.

Though, I am a little proud that, subconsciously, I did sort that out as a current writer -- I don't know if Pagemelt knows that I'm rewriting the story into an original fiction, but in the original-fiction version Tonks is very much gender-questioning and their name and how the adults can help them through it is a whole entire subplot -- Remus finds out about the shift in names, asks Andromeda about it, draws his own conclusions, and then speaks to a canonically trans character about who should (or if they should) offer to be a sympathetic older queer presence in their life.

So overall, I'm feeling quite proud both of myself and Pagemelt, delighted that Stealing Harry continues to be considered a classic text, and not unsatisfied that people are looking at it critically. As you all know from my original work I don't enjoy being told my works' flaws but I do like knowing them so that I can continue to learn and grow as a writer, and Pagemelt said some things that I think will stick with me as I continue. Plus it has made me want to get back into work on the Ozyverse, the adaptation of Stealing Harry, so once I'm no longer traveling with a bluetooth keyboard and an ancient tablet as my primary mode of communication I will get on that....

[ghostbusters-hq]

Workplace Distractions (Egon Spengler x Reader)

words: 1.3k

pairing: Egon Spengler x Gender Neutral Reader

summary:  Egon's been working a lot lately so you go to the firehouse to try and distract him for a while. (Established relationship, Egon trying to be a Good Boyfriend, lots of cute stuff!)

Janine was sitting at her desk, her chin resting on her hand with her eyes cast down at the magazine she was idly flicking through. At the sound of the front door opening, she glanced up.

“Oh, y/n!” she perked up when she saw you, lifting her glasses off her face.

“Hey Janine.” You said, pushing your hands into your jacket’s pockets as you approached her desk.

“What are you doing here, ain’t it your day off?” Janine asked.

“Yeah, I was bored at home. Figured I’d come see what everyone was up to.” You said, and turned to look at the empty space where ECTO-1 was normally parked. You nodded your head towards it and turned back to Janine. “The guys out on a job?”

She nodded.

“Just Ray and Winston.” She said.

“Oh right, nice.” You said, rocking back onto your heels and fidgeting with the few coins that were in one of your pockets. “So um, is-“

“Egon’s upstairs.” She said, giving you a knowing smile, and you felt your cheeks heat up.

By this point, everyone knew that you and Egon were...romantically involved. Not that you minded, of course. In fact, you were actually glad everyone knew, and they were all supportive so that was nice. You just always got a little sheepish whenever it was brought up, even though the two of you had ‘officially’ been going out for a few months now.

“Oh, o-okay! Thanks Janine.” You said, giving her a smile before heading for the stairs.

As expected, you found the elusive Dr. Spengler hunched over his workbench the other side of the room as you reached the top of the stairs. You smiled and headed across to him. He clocked your footsteps as you approached and lifted his head from his microscope, glancing over his shoulder.

“Oh, y/n. I thought you were off today?” he asked.

“Thought I’d come down and bother you instead.” You replied, sidling up to him and giving his arm a playful nudge. He gave you a small smile.

“Fine with me.”

You grinned and peered over his arm to see what was on the desk. “Whatcha working on?”

“Oh.” He said, turning his attention back to his work. “Just taking a closer look at the ectoplasm sample we got yesterday. Very interesting, it’s different to anything else we’ve ever seen...”

He continued talking and you stepped over to an empty part of the workbench and hopped up onto it as you listened to him.

“Sounds pretty cool!” you said, having not actually understood half of the scientific terms he’d used. It didn’t hinder your interest, though. You did genuinely love listening to him speak about his work. He seemed vaguely amused by your summarisation.

“Yes, I’d say it was pretty cool.” He said.

His attention returned to his microscope, and you bit your lip as you watched him.

“So, um…” you said after a minute, breaking the silence. Egon didn’t look up from what he was doing, but you knew he was listening.

“I was thinking, maybe we could…go out for pizza later?” you asked, restlessly swinging your legs.

“I-If you’re not too busy, that is. It’s okay if you have work to finish.” You added quickly, not wanting to pressure him.

Egon looked up and you had your eyes cast down at your lap, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. He suddenly realised he had been working an awful lot lately and you had been incredibly patient with him – as you always were, and he never took your patience for granted.

“I’d love to.” He said, straightening up.

“Really? You’re sure you’re not too busy?” you asked.

Egon smiled and moved across to where you were sitting on the edge of his workbench, stepping forward to stand between your legs.

“I’m sure I can make some time for you.” He said quietly, letting his hands rest on your waist.

You met those big brown eyes of his and felt yourself blushing up to your ears with how close he was.

Egon famously despised most forms of physical contact. He didn’t like shaking hands with people, never mind hugging them. So at the beginning of your relationship, it was mostly you initiating things – after you’d made sure he was comfortable with it, of course.

It had made you wonder if there really was any truth in Venkman’s teasing “40 year old virgin” comments, but you quickly learned that Egon was just self-conscious when it came to expressing himself physically. Despite not being sexually active during his younger years in college, he’d assured you that he had been with a handful of people through his adult life. You’d left it at that.

It made your heart swell knowing that he was comfortable enough with you to let his guard down a little now, even when you weren’t in private.

You couldn’t get any words out before he leaned down and kissed you, so gently that it was as if he were worried you might shatter under him. Your shoulders relaxed almost immediately, and you wound your arms around his middle, underneath his lab coat, feeling his warmth against your palms through his shirt.

Even sat on the workbench as you were, your height difference was still evident with the way you were stretching up to meet him. He pulled away (much too soon for your liking), and you were left gazing up at him, lips slightly parted. Egon smiled, lifting a hand to rest against your cheek, his thumb lightly grazing over the skin there.

“I like it when you blush.” He said, enjoying how you then blushed even harder at his comment.

“I-I…uh…” you stumbled over your words, mind still reeling from the kiss he’d just given you. “Shut up and kiss me again.”

He smirked and leaned down again, his grip on your waist tightening ever so slightly as he pressed his lips to yours. You could smell the hair gel he used, the smell of soap that still lingered on his skin from his shower that morning, and he tasted of coffee and candy bars (yeah, he really needed to cut down on those things). There was also something else that you couldn’t describe that was overloading your senses – something that was just uniquely Egon. You loved it, and you wanted more.

“Whoah, hey!”

The incredibly enjoyable moment you’d been having was abruptly halted by Venkman’s voice coming from the top of the stairs. You immediately yanked your head back and poked your head out from behind Egon to see him approaching, shaking his head.

“Please, no frolicking in the workplace, kids.” He said. At this point, Egon seemed immune to Peter’s teasing comments, but the fact you’d been caught in the act still got you all sheepish.

“Hello, Peter.” Egon said with a small smile, stepping away from you just slightly. “Did you need something?”

“Forgot my wallet. Ah! There it is.”

By chance, it was lying just beside you on the workbench and he reached over to grab it, then pushed it into his jacket pocket.

“Now, I’m going to meet Dana. Don’t you two lovebirds go havin’ too much fun now, you hear?” he said, giving you a wink before he turned to make his way back to the stairs.

“Mmhmm. Bye Pete.” You said. “Say hi to Dana for us.”

“Don’t forget to use protection!” he called as he descended the stairs. Your eyes widened at the comment, and you heard him chuckle before he went out of earshot.

You sighed and hopped off the workbench, letting out a small laugh. “I’m gonna hit him one day.”

“I think Janine might beat you to it.” Egon said, looking down at you. “But how about we get that pizza first?”

You grinned and nodded, suddenly overly aware of how hungry you were. “Good plan.”