#yes i really just posted in honor of

[hippaforalkus]

Tell me why I can get no relief Wondering when they'll come for me A paranoid man makes paranoid plans I do what I can, but it's out of my hands Struggling just to find my peace

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

mingyu angst / smut recs please 🥺🥺🥺

- 🤸🏻‍♂️

Mingyu angst anon? MINGYU ANGST!!

I'm so sorry this took so fucking long I am: [a terrible person]

My recs (sorry, there's not really any angst in these 😭):

this is kinda soft!dom but also mean!gyu by @kaespas and bro... it's so good. In my opinion no one does mean!svt (mean!txt too like??) quite like kaespas does. I eat their stuff up potato chips...

The very first night: i can’t read this yet BECAUSE IM WRITING A GYU EX FIC that i started last christmas and it’s ALSO a six month gap 😭 so I have to stay uninfluenced and away from this story until I’m done with it but I mean come on exes to lovers with kim mingyu? And let’s be so real 2k notes speaks for itself

A wolf in sheep's clothing by @rubyreduji: whatttttt is this another JJ fic rec from brie?? That’s crazzzzyyyyy I’m not a sub!svt conisseir BUT THIS WAS SO GOOD. Like. JUST GO READ IT.

The Real Thing by @gguksgalaxy: do you like somnophilia? :) I DO and this is baby somnophilia *hearts*

"is this everything you dreamed of?" by @8loveletters: look, it's pretty dubby. And I: [love dubcon] BUT ITS REALLY GOOD mutual pining type shit!

him or me? by @wwtneosay: in the wise words of Yeongtae: toxic, toxic, toxic but who doesn't want to read gyu getting jealous and fucking y/n like be so for real

to the brim by @toruro: you asked for mingyu smut. AND MIKA DELIVERED. if you want husband!mingyu with a breeding kink? Here you go 🤭

Excuse Me by @smileysuh: SOULMATE AUS ARE MY FAVORITE THINGS ON THE PLANET EARTH PLEASE GOD READ THIS IT'S SO GOOD (ITS JUST FLUFF WHICH YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR BUT STILL)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ooo this Warloc Wally AU makes me anticipate Howdy as the Tavern keeper with the bulletin board with jobs but every time Wally comes in Howdys just on edge cause "this tiny man just *Feels* off..."

All Wally wants is some apple cider

ohhhhh oooooo y'know in the Original Ramble i stated that he stick With the group on their adventures as a traveling salesman but ough. tavern keeper Howdy...

maybe... maybe we can combine the two by the group being Based Out Of a particular town and Howdy owns the local tavern, but sometimes accompanies the group on their adventures both because he needs a "break" and to sell his wares to fresh faces <3 his staff can handle the tavern in his absence

[the-halfling-prince]

I feel like we don't talk enough about "Isn't it weird to think if your hand was inside of a dragon, and your mind was still in control of it, you could've killed the dragon from the inside by crushing it's heart or something"

[bionicbore]

Hi can I rant about Adam and Chase? I’ve done it a bit before but I wanna rant about Adam and Chase

So many people act like Chase is the only one who ever gets punished, and sometimes unfairly so, while Adam gets to continue bad behavior scot-free. And every time I watch an episode... fam I just don’t get it

Bro Down, Chase gets scolded more so than Adam. Because Chase dislocated Adam’s arm. Also, Adam is still scolded too, because none of them really consider the repercussions of getting too hurt

Brother Battle, Adam doesn’t get punished, but Chase... doesn’t either. Donald was excessively dismissive in this episode, and Adam excessively physical, but Chase never gets punished for trying to step up. Douglas gets singled out for enabling them. And by the end, both boys are scolded equally

Smart and Smarter, Adam shows nothing but excitement and support about Chase trying to win Student of the Semester. And when Chase struggles to appeal to others, Adam goes out of his way to help, all while taking no credit for his efforts. They only clash because Chase’s insecurities start to flare and he belittles Adam’s intelligence. And this episode demonstrates that Chase is more than capable of physically fending off Adam if he so chooses

Something of note about Chase, on account of his hyper-intelligence, has incredibly high expectations for himself. He’s desperate to meet them and it manifests as insecurity and ego. It often takes his peers pointing out his hubris for him to realize that he was being a jerk, ‘cause he gets so lost in his own head that he overlooks how others may end up impacted by his actions

Adam never needs someone else to tell him when he’s the only one in the wrong. Spike Fright was Adam’s ugliest episode, I think, but it ends with Adam realizing on his own that he was a jerk. He goes out of his way to take fault and convince Sabrina that Chase really is a good guy

Adam rarely holds grudges. I’ve seen people tell me the reason Chase doesn’t defend himself is ‘cause “He can’t keep it up forever, Adam will be waiting and he might treat Chase worse outta spite” And like. WHERE does that logic even come from lol. If someone manages to pull a fast one on Adam he actually praises it if it’s funny enough. He thought Bree’s cybermask prank was awesome and just gleefully watched when it started to backfire. He was excited to join Chase in vandalizing his Student photo. He held no ill-will towards Chase about his arm

I love Chase because I think his flaws are interesting: they make perfect sense for someone who grew up with a hyper-functional brain, and we see him have ups and downs on how it can impact his social skills and self-image

And I love Adam because he’s very secure in himself: he’s not booksmart but he’s actually shown to be self-aware and has better social skills. He’s a roughhouser and isn’t pure of heart: he gets jealous, and like anyone who’s used to a status quo, can make rash decisions when drastic change is presented. But he’s honest enough with himself that he doesn’t need anybody to point those flaws out to him, he knows this about himself and admits as such. But he’s not actively malicious

They’re equal opposites, and I just really love that about them

[banqanas]

20240308 Design Your Fantastic Future (DYFF) - Nakajima Sota's graduation songs choice

Sota: You're listening to FM802 Design Your Fantastic Future with DJ Nakajima Sota from FANTASTICS. Today is March 8th and tomorrow is the 9th and so, please listen to Remioromen's [March 9th].

...

Sota: This song is such a hit during graduation season. So I guess it's that time of the year already? Graduation season is here again. What song did everyone sing during your graduation day? I can't seem to recall what mine was...

Sota: After attending a few graduation ceremonies, I still think Remioromen's [March 9th] is the most memorable... During my student days, I myself sing that song at the karaoke a lot. Even the MV that plays in the karaoke version has a graduation day theme, so it really tugs your heartstrings. I've seen it too many times to count now.

Sota: There's also the song by ikimonogakari, [Yell]. I remember I sang it all the time... The lyric, "Goodbye isn't a sad parting word". What a really wonderful phrase... I think that's the song we sang at our school's choir competition. I think everyone will sing this song when it's graduation. It's a perfect song to sing together as a group.

Sota: I hope FANTASTICS will come to make a graduation-themed song too.

Sota: And now I will present two songs from Nakajima Sota's Graduation Season Headphone Music choice. Of the songs with the theme of graduation, most of them will have a theme of "parting" and "separation".

Sota: In my case, when I auditioned and selected as FANTASTICS during VBA5, I was in my third year of high school. During our graduation ceremony, all my friends made a fuss about it. Everyone found out that I'll be moving from Osaka to Tokyo soon while my friends all went to university. I think most of them moved up to continue their education, so for me and my friends, that day was really a goodbye.

Sota: My friends are all really good folks and cheered me on and said "Let's meet up again!", I still remember that moment. So personally, I don't consider it to be a parting or goodbye.

Sota: And among all the graduation-themed songs, these two songs are the ones that I especially feel like sharing with everyone listening to this radio.

Sota: Please listen, Mrs Green Apple's [Shunshu - Spring fever] and EXILE ATSUSHI's [Sakura no Kisetsu - Season of cherry blossoms]

Featured songs list:

[purpleactuallydoarts]

No, Admiral. I think he’s broken

Still having brainrots of these two so there may (or may not) be a spam :’)

[crunchycrystals]

thinking about how luke castellan started working with kronos to get back at the gods not really out of protection for thalia or annabeth who both got left behind by their godly parents and had to fend for themselves at such a young age, but because hermes gave him a quest hercules already did and he was angry about the lack of glory that came from it

[swankpalanquin]

thinking about the time in my beowulf class when we were discussing grendel and i was saying about how monsters in contemporary works are often portrayed as sympathetic as opposed to just being scary and i gave vampires as a good example of this. like in the original book of dracula, for the most part, dracula is seen as this terrifying creature that needs to be defeated. but nowadays there are a lot of vampire stories where this def isn't the case. and i was like, what if we considered that the readers/listeners of beowulf saw grendel as just this scary creature? and one of the other students said sort of snarkily to me, i wonder what you think of frankenstein then. i didn't get to answer cos the discussion was moving on, but like, dracula as written by bram stoker based on folklore around fears of death and the undead is not the the same as frankenstein's monster created by mary shelley for literary purposes??

[unofficialadamtaurus]

OKAY IM TRYING NOT TO GASP AND CRY AND VOMITING RN AND I

AKAUBSISIWORNXIEJJWPWHF

ill try to make a coherent ask, but WITH THIS STORY???? THIS CHAPTER??????? THE FIGHT????? no promises.

HONESTLY LOVE how blake didn’t go alone and her friends insisted on backing her up. the friendships youve built between team rwby and team jnr+o through this entire fic has been AMAZING, and unlike the show proper, their connection with Blake feels so real that when her friends are actually behind her through and through, it’s not surprising (in a REALLY good way if that makes sense LMAOOO).

AND HOLY FUCKING MOTHER OF GOD there’s SO MUCH tension and blake’s nerves and adam leading her through the tunnel and and and just YOU SET THE ATMOSPHERE SO PERFECTLY LIKE ITS FOR REAL PALPABLE. LIKE 😩 you’re gonna give me a panic attack I SWEAR. THE TENSION IS JUST it feels like a ton of dumbbells landed on fucking chest and I CANT BREATHEEEEEE. seriously you left me on the tip of an edge of mount fucking evrest with the wind going 50+ mph and I LOVED every fucking second.

THE FIGHT GOD THE FIGHT IS JUST I CANT ITS LIKE im fucking speechless.

> He flipped the switch.

YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH MY HEART JUMPED WHEN I READ THAAAATTTT.

> She raised her head and sought his eye. The warmth she'd seen earlier was gone like it had never been there at all. In its place was a fury so cold it sent chills down her spine.

AND FUCKING THE WHAT ADAM BRO YO GONNA FUCKING BEAT HER ASS dude is SO LOST IT LIKE. Adam my homie 😔

> In Argus, Blake had thought he'd been over the edge. Now, the chilling realization washed over her that he hadn't been. He'd been angry, he'd been desperate, but he'd still, on some twisted level, cared about her. She had been a target, yes, but he had at least seen her as a person. Someone whose trust and respect he wanted, even if he had to take it back by force.

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

in all seriousness, god does your wording and phrasing just hurt my heart. not just for adam, who is so clearly lost and hurt and confused and angry but like. blake dude. the dialogue, the choreography, how she just holds back, hiw she takes the blows, how she just wants him to listen. fuck man. everything just sells how much it hurts her to fight her mentor, her friend, someone she once wholeheartedly believed in. and hes full on trying to kill her.

FUCK YOU JUST- FUCK this is amazing.

> She exhaled.

YOU FUCKED UP, BITCH

> "I was wrong," she said. "You're not a monster."

> "You're angry and confused and scared, and you need help."

>"You think I'm scared of you? No, Blake. I'm happy. Happy that you've finally given me an opportunity to put everything you've done to me behind me.”

I- GOD STOP HURTING ME. You’re hitting me right in the chest EACH fucking time they talk ughhhghghghgghghhhhh

> "Why are you always so obstinate?"

he may be at rock bottom trying to murder someone who’s trying to help him, but at least he got that vocabulary ;)

> "You've picked quite the hill to die on, my love."

> The caustic, mocking edge to his words had her hackles rising but she refused to take the bait. "I made a promise," she said thickly through the blood streaming from her nose, "never again."

CALL BACK HELL YEAH THIS BLAKE KEEPS HER PROMISES

> This time, their clash ended in a deadlock, Wilt grinding against Gambol Shroud's sheath. Sparks cast their faces in harsh light. Adam bore down even harder. If she took the supporting hand holding her pistol away from the sheath for even a second, Wilt would slice her from cheek to hip. Her aura was hanging on by threads.

> "Give. Up."

> She pushed back with everything she had, shoulders screaming, wrists on fire while she met him pound for pound and glare for glare.

> "I. Won't."

You left me speechless. No fucking words. No words.

> "Is this all you can do?"

> "You were supposed to be better than them, you were supposed to change things!"

MAJOR Obi-wan vs Anakin vibes. scratch that. those two WISH they were blake and adam.

> Oh.

I SEE THAT. DONT THINK I DONT. LINE SWITCH!!!!!!

DUDE that whole part about Blake’s eyes!!!!!! HOW IT FINALLY GOT TO ADAM

> Think, it had told him. Rest, it had begged.

MY HEART.

ADAM HAVING HIS SWORD TO HER THROAT AS HER HANDS BLEED ALMOST DYING IS EVERYTHING I NEED

> "If this isn't the answer," Adam's voice shook, "if this rage has no remedy…" His exposed blue eye was pained and confused and almost pleading when he asked, voice breaking,

> "What am I supposed to do?"

MY

FUCKING

HEART

I AM NOT OKAY. ADAM IS NOT OKAY.

thank you for beating the shit out of blake by the way. i love it when characters get all bloody and messed up 😊 her fingers? almost gone.

making her team show up RIGHT as she was getting to adam???? FUCK YOUUUUUUU

ruby vs adam? hell yes. qrow vs adam? FUCK yes. Ruby qrow and Weiss vs adam???????????

FUCK

YEAH

and very nice environment interaction 👍

that ending tho. just. man. well done. no idea what Blake is planning nor what’ll happen to Adam but SHIT i am hyped to see

thank you thank you thank you for making amazing things 🙏🙏🥹 this is just. I don’t think I’ve ever read a fic that’s made me so invested and emotionally destroyed as this one. great fucking stuff.

I was hyped for your review and goddamn you did NOT disappoint. If you're gonna thank me for making amazing things, I'm gonna thank you for giving the play-by-play reactions to them, I fucking live for that shit.

Expect more callbacks in the next chapter, including one to the heaviest bit of foreshadowing in the story that literally no one commented on when it happened. I stated outright the resolution of the entire Blake and Adam subplot and no one said a word 😂

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

FYI artists and writers: some info regarding tumblr's new "third-party sharing" (aka selling your content to OpenAI and Midjourney)

You may have already seen the post by @staff regarding third-party sharing and how to opt out. You may have also already seen various news articles discussing the matter.

But here's a little further clarity re some questions I had, and you may too. Caveat: Not all of this is on official tumblr pages, so it's possible things may change.

(1) "I heard they already have access to my data and it doesn't really matter if I opt out"

From the 404 article:

A new FAQ section we reviewed is titled “What happens when you opt out?” states “If you opt out from the start, we will block crawlers from accessing your content by adding your site on a disallowed list. If you change your mind later, we also plan to update any partners about people who newly opt-out and ask that their content be removed from past sources and future training.”

So please, go click that opt-out button.

(2) Some future user: "I've been away from tumblr for months, and I just heard about all this. I didn't opt out before, so does it make a difference anymore?"

Another internal document shows that, on February 23, an employee asked in a staff-only thread, “Do we have assurances that if a user opts out of their data being shared with third parties that our existing data partners will be notified of such a change and remove their data?” Andrew Spittle, Automattic’s head of AI replied: “We will notify existing partners on a regular basis about anyone who's opted out since the last time we provided a list. I want this to be an ongoing process where we regularly advocate for past content to be excluded based on current preferences. We will ask that content be deleted and removed from any future training runs. I believe partners will honor this based on our conversations with them to this point. I don't think they gain much overall by retaining it.”

It should make a difference! Go click that button.

(3) "I opted out, but my art posts have been reblogged by so many people, and I don't know if they all opted out. What does that mean for my stuff?"

This answer is actually on the support page for the toggle:

This option will prevent your blog's content, even when reblogged, from being shared with our licensed network of content and research partners, including those that train AI models.

And some further clarification by the COO and a product manager:

zingring: A couple people from work have reached out to let me know that yes, it applies to reblogs of "don't scrape" content. If you opt out, your content is opted out, even in reblog form. cyle: yep, for reblogs, we're taking it so far as "if anybody in the reblog trail has opted out, all of the content in that reblog will be opted out", when a reblog could be scraped/shared.

So not only your reblogged posts, but anyone who contributed in a reblog (such as posts where someone has been inspired to draw fanart of the OP) will presumably be protected by your opt-out. (A good reason to opt out even if you yourself are not a creator.)

Furthermore, if you the OP were offline and didn't know about the opt-out, if someone contributed to a reblog and they are opted out, then your original work is also protected. (Which makes it very tempting to contribute "scrapeable content" now whenever I reblog from an abandoned/disused blog...)

(4) "What about deleted blogs? They can't opt out!"

I was told by someone (not official) that he read "deleted blogs are all opted-out by default". However, he didn't recall the source, and I can't find it, so I can't guarantee that info. If I get more details - like if/when tumblr puts up that FAQ as reported in the 404 article - I will add it here as soon as I can.

Edit, tumblr has updated their help page for the option to opt-out of third-party sharing! It now states:

The content which will not be shared with our licensed network of content and research partners, including those that train AI models, includes: • Posts and reblogs of posts from blogs who have enabled the "Prevent third-party sharing" option. • Posts and reblogs of posts from deleted blogs. • Posts and reblogs of posts from password-protected blogs. • Posts and reblogs of posts from explicit blogs. • Posts and reblogs of posts from suspended/deactivated blogs. • Private posts. • Drafts. • Messages. • Asks and submissions which have not been publicly posted. • Post+ subscriber-only posts. • Explicit posts.

So no need to worry about your old deleted blogs that still have reblogs floating around. *\o/*

But for your existing blogs, please use the opt out option. And a reminder of how to opt out, under the cut:

The opt-out toggle is in Blog Settings, and please note you need to do it for each one of your blogs / sideblogs.

On dashboard, the toggle is at https://www.tumblr.com/settings/blog/blogname [replace "blogname" as applicable] down by Visibility:

For mobile, you need the most recent update of the app. (Android version 33.4.1.100, iOs version 33.4.) Then go to your blog tab (the little person icon), and then the gear icon for Settings, then click Visibility.

Again, if you have a sideblog, go back to the blog tab, switch to it, and go to settings again. Repeat as necessary.

If you do not have access to the newest version of the app for whatever reason, you can also log into tumblr in your mobile browser. Same URL as per desktop above, same location.

Note you do not need to change settings in both desktop and the app, just one is fine.

I hope this helps!

[brainrotdotorg]

imagine a dashboard for alligators. what do you think that would look like

2 notes

🍏gatoridae Follow

Controversial opinion. If you're doing nothing but eating meat, what are you even doing. Remember to include bugs, fruits, and legumes into your diet in order to help aid digestion of the meat that you get from snakes, fish, and mammals.

Just because we have the reputation for eating lots of meat, that doesn't mean we have to stick to it.

🥒biting-you-biting-you Follow

counterpoint: fuit yucky

🪵blog-from-a-bog Follow

wdym reputation of eating meat. i float lik ea log thats what im known for

4,904 notes

🌿swamp-ass Follow

asked dad if i could go and steal some Floridian guy's lunch and he said "we have prey at home" girl we have been doing shit ALL DAY i am an awesome 600 pounds and I need some meat left on me to deathroll with. let me get a quick snack that i don't need to kill mmmmmmm burgers I want people food soooooo badddd....... i know they shouldn't feed it to me but I have such a lovely smile oh please oh please give me your burger.........

182 notes

🥗aliali-seeyoulater Follow

mom says it was cold the season she laid me so i have to be a girl. because girls are always born from eggs laid during cold seasons.

cope and seethe mother first of all, second of all, the reason i am transgender is because you kept me too fucking snuggly warm in the nest.

#i guess if you wanted a daughter you should have. idk. made a shittier nest? #thats not really my fault man

81,337 notes

⛰fuckyeahhugesnout Follow

You'll never guess how I just learned that we have the honor of being the "loudest reptiles in the world"

🫑teethem Follow

Yeah yeah, the 90 decibel mating bellow, we've all heard it.

🤢ch0mper Follow

we've all heard the what

135,633 notes

🩲gaytorrr Follow

this guy asked if i wanted to see his gator hole and i said fuck yes. why this boy take me into a 65 foot long hole in the mud at the bottom of the lake

6,421 notes

🏞daily-clawsitivity

✨Remember to take it easy sometimes!✨We thrive in slow-moving waters!✨Even though we can run fast, we get tired fast too-- it's okay to let yourself take breaks!✨Let yourself relax, that's how we made it this far as a species.

mud-rocks-deactivated20140706

Yeah, imagine telling your prehistoric great great great great great great great great great great grandpa or something to calm down and relax when he should be doing nothing but deathrolls. the longevity of the species should be your only goal. It's irresponsible to encourage your fucking species to fall behind even more than it already has? Have some pride, you're not a crocodile.

scalesssss-deactivated20150310

jesus christ calm down

alidile-crocogator-deactvated20140709

Okay, this post has a lot of misconceptions in it. There aren't as many differences between crocodiles and alligators than you think. It's really harmful to think that we have nothing in common with each other. So what if they're carnivores and we're closer to omnivores, or their snouts are more U shaped while ours are V shaped. We're both badass miracles of nature that have no reason to be pit against one another all the time.

Don't listen to guys like this. It's just hateful and small-minded.

stop-jawlock-androll-deactivated20140911

crocs are like. like them shoes that float right

wetlandia898 Follow

i wish i was a crocodile because i could have a virgin birth and i wanted to see what it would be like to eat an immaculate conception.

bigchallengesrealblog-deactivated20190412

welcome to the no notes gator/croc discourse post.

🦖l8rg8tr-z Follow

omg this is the post.... i can't believe i would see this naturally on my dash

🎍taildraggers Follow

Uh are we just going to ignore the virgin birth reply orrrrrrrrr

🐊gator-heritage-posts

gator heritage post

0 notes

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Follow

hgwiow h

hsfhjs

howw ws i nbevyrboy tyopingssaog oo vd wi hhrth rh thrre cl alawas ?>>

🌴a-l-g-t-r Follow

lmao this idiot never learned how to use their tail to type

#/j lol yeah its kind of hard at first #actually i'd say cut your losses and forget how to type bring the laptop back to the dumpster its not worth it

39 notes

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

am i fucking stupid. i just learned theres another species of alligator other than just me and the guys in my swamp. and i said "oh wow I didn't know that! which one of the two are we haha" and my buddy just stared at me like I was a fucking idiot. how am i supposed to know if no one ever tells me this . WHICH AM I

🍖meet-eat3r Follow

there are only 70-80 mature chinese gators in existence while there are 750,00-1 million mature american gators . do the math.

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

i could have just hatched you don't know me.

20,570 notes

🍀gatortears Follow

a group of queer gators in church call that a congregaytion

#reblogging this one bc none of you appreciate me

1 notes

👞makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

I'm seeing the no notes gator/croc post circulate again and ha ha yes it's very funny, but we are NOT starting gator/croc discourse in 2024. lets leave that shit in the past. i know that's not what the post really ended up being about but i am soooooo sick of it.

🌾clawstothewalls Follow

okay, so the one with a fetish for getting turned into handbags is gonna talk down to us now.

👞 makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

Not to be a pedant but its Shoes Actually. It even says so in the name. Shoes.

2,663 notes

[gojoest]

𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐇 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐋𝐄 — gojo satoru

MDNI, f! reader, she/her pronouns used, wc: 3.3k, flashback of how you met (1st part of the fic, past tense used, then we jump back to present, divider used to separate the two timelines. both take place on his birthday btw), suguru makes an appearance (as satoru’s wingman :3), established relationship (you’re married & have a daughter), reader wears a dress, first time face sitting + riding (oral, f! receiving), pet names (baby, my love), he cums in his pants, breeding implied at the end (sort of, to avoid spoilers)

a/n: happy birthday to my biggest mental illness ♡

side note: if the story of how you met sounds familiar to you, please note that it was from one of my talk posts from a while ago & i decided to make use of it : )

what gojo satoru wants — he always gets.

after all, it’s how he made you his as well.

“satoru, you’re staring way too hard at her”, suguru nudged him on the arm.

“think she noticed, too?”, satoru chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, ears turning slightly red from embarrassment, unsure if it was because he got caught or that it was too obvious he was checking you out.

“very likely. i mean, it’s hard not to notice an annoying pair of blue laser beams persistently invading your space”, suguru mocked. “are you going to talk to her?”

“yes”, satoru firmly replied, without peeling his eyes from you, “i’ll ask her out, i think”

“hey, hey. slow down there”

“nope”, satoru shrugged, almost like a stubborn child disobeying his parent, “i’ve made up my mind — i really want to make her mine”

it was a pure coincidence, or some might say fate, that you ended up in the same restaurant — he was there celebrating his birthday with a small circle of friends while you were present to honor your colleague that had just gotten a promotion at work.

satoru’s eyes relentlessly followed your every move, every gesture, from the moment you walked in and settled on the table next to his. it was rather unusual for him to be this interested in someone simply upon sight, in fact, even desiring to pursue something with someone so immediately. it was always the other way around — women would flock to him because of his looks and peculiar behavior, and of course — his money — but he would turn them down without batting an eye. love and seeking romance were never a priority for him, he did not have time nor any interest in them. but here he was, contradicting himself, being blatantly distracted by your presence while somehow trying to simulate an active conversation with his friends, more than frequently averting his gaze to look at you, his brain busy coming up with a plan to get your number by the end of the night.

it didn’t take him too long to finally make his move. he stood up from his chair and walked over to your table, stopping right behind your seat.

“excuse me”, he leaned in, placing one hand at the edge of the table and the other — at the back of your chair, “hello”, his face mere inches away from yours. taken aback by the way he, a complete stranger, had the guts to get this close to you, you turned to face him with a questioning look.

“i felt like i would regret it for the rest of my life if i didn’t come say hi to you”, he spoke.

truth be told, despite being astounded and a bit put off by his approach, you were slightly intrigued. he was handsome, pretty even — like that one oddly eye-catching cloud in a sky full of thousands that you notice as soon as you look up. the white henley shirt he was wearing made the blue in his eyes pop even more, the v-neck revealing a little bit of his well-crafted chest, just enough to leave you tiny bit wondering about the ridges of his abs beneath.

as much as the scenery up close made your cheeks feel hot, his boldness rubbed you up the wrong way, too much to let it just slide, and you snapped. “is that so? well, now that you’ve said your hi, you can go back to your table and live with no regrets for the rest of your life”, you rolled your eyes skeptically, pushing his hand off the table.

“oh, i am sorry”, he chuckled, brushing his hair back with a hand, “but there are three more things i need to do before leaving, i’m afraid”

you raised an eyebrow, questioning.

“first, let me introduce myself — i am gojo satoru, also known as the man to be your boyfriend, then your husband, and then the father of your children”, he smugly said. your eyes widening at the audacity of his declaration that left you at a loss for words. “second, i hope you don’t mind introducing yourself as well — as you are to be my girlfriend, then my wife, and then the mother of my children — it’s only natural that i know your name”, he continued, “and last but not least — i am not leaving until you give me your number so we can make this all work”

wow. this man was really fucked in the head, you were sure of it — who in the right mind would speak such nonsense to someone they just met? “you have to be joking, right?”, you laughed in genuine disbelief.

“no. i am dead serious”, he replied in a heartbeat.

“is this your move? you pull this on everyone you find remotely attractive?”, you narrowed your eyes.

“actually—”, suguru interrupted, placing a hand on satoru’s shoulder as he approached from behind, “no”, he spoke. “believe me when i tell you this — he’s never been this smooth in his entire life. i know he probably came off a bit creepy, considering the boldness of his actions — hell, even i am creeped out because it’s pretty unusual for him to act like this”, he laughed, glancing at satoru to let him know that he got his back on this. “but, what i’m trying to say is — my friend here seems to really like you as i’ve never seen him be so intense and interested in anyone before. he’s also a birthday boy today — so could you at least give him a chance before turning him down so quickly? you can come sit with us before you make up your mind on whether you want to give him your number or not?”

you thought for a second, weighing the options in your mind — he was pretty, although he annoyed you a little bit by being all bossy and arrogant as if you were compelled to belong to him just because he said so. but there was just something about him you couldn’t quite put your finger on that made you question yourself. were you actually drawn to him? you could say “no” and never hear from him again, occasionally pondering over the what-if’s and should-have’s from this night; or you could say “fuck it” and see where this strange encounter goes, and live your life without regrets — as he would say. there — he was already getting under your skin…

“well”, you sighed, “guess i’m down for that”

by the end of the night not only did you give him your number, but also a promise for a date the next day — the first of many to follow after.

“careful, you’ll wake her up”, you whisper, leaning against the doorframe of your 3-year old’s room and watching your husband place a soft peck on your daughter’s forehead.

“can’t help it”, he speaks quietly, “she looks like an angel”, before fixing the blankets around her, making sure she’s tucked in all cozily. “the nanny said she cried for papa while we were gone”, he puts a hand over his mouth to stop his lips from trembling, his eyes filled with nothing but love and tenderness, welling up and flowing from the corners.

“she’s such a daddy’s girl”, you sigh, a soft smile present on your face, “next year we can stay home and invite everyone else over — that way we won’t have to worry about missing her bedtime”.

“yea”, he hums, “let’s do that next year”, giving her one last kiss before turning off the night lamp and tiptoeing to you. “come on”, he puts a hand at the small of your back as you both walk out of the room.

“do you remember”, satoru speaks softly into your ear while walking behind you on your way to your shared bedroom, his front flat against your back, the hand at the small of it now circling around to rest over your navel, while the other — reaches for the handle of your bedroom door to push it open, “the night we first met on my birthday?”, he continues after carefully guiding you inside.

you stop in the middle of the room, his arms still wrapped around you from behind, your hands resting over his and playing with his knuckles.

“how can i not?” you chuckle, tilting your head back to let him rest his chin on your forehead, “that was one hell of a fortune telling you pulled on me back then”

“but i was right, no?”, he brushes his lips on your forehead before leaving a soft peck, “see — you’re all mine now, just like i said”, and then another, ”i made you my girlfriend first”, and another, “then i gave you my last name”, and a fourth one, “and then you gave me a beautiful daughter, made me a father”, before turning you around to face him.

“you partly owe it to suguru though — he eased me into the situation, unlike you”, you reply, humbling him like you always do. your head is nestled on his broad chest as one of his hands caress the back of it. still in his embrace, he slowly walks you towards the bed. sits at the edge of it and straddles you on his lap. his palms finding their way to the plush of your thighs draped over his, caressing them tenderly but needily as his fingertips press and then release against your flesh in quick repetitive motions.

“this is because i asked him to give me a hand in case you cut me off”, he admits, tilting his head to meet your lips, not to kiss but just to keep them brushing against each other as you speak. he loved doing this a lot.

“oh?”, you gasp into his mouth, pretending to be shocked to your core, “you wanted me so much that you of all people, the gojo satoru, had to ask someone else for help?”

“you have no idea. if that hadn’t worked, i would’ve fallen on my hands and knees and begged you to take me”, one of his hands reaching the side of your face, playing his fingers on the strands of your hair covering your cheek before tucking them behind your ear.

“hmm”, you doubt, “is that so?”, nuzzling your nose against his.

“mhmm”, he nods, “there’s nothing i wouldn’t do for you, i thought you knew that by now. it kind of hurts my feelings that you doubt me actually”, he acts offended, pursing his lips and turning his head to the side to face away from you.

“oh my, what have i done now”, you knit your brows and press your cheek against his, pretending to be very, very sorry about what you just said.

“you made the birthday boy sad”, he huffs a silly, somehow obviously forced, pout, “you’ve got to make it up to me somehow”

“i’d do anything to make the birthday boy smile again — just say the word”, you sweetly pamper, patting the top of his head.

“really?”

“really.”

“anything?”

“anything.”

“you promise not to go back on your word?”

“i promise.”

he pulls his cheek away from yours and looks you in the eyes, the blue in his shining with a darker shade of mischief now. and considering the smug smile on his face, you sigh — perhaps you just got yourself played, falling face down into his little trap.

“then”, he points at his own face, “sit on it”

to say you were surprised by his request would be a lie. he’s many times tried coaxing you into doing this in the past but somehow you managed to avoid it, part of you still shying away from it. it’s not like his tongue has never been inside you before. but riding it as if it were his cock seemed way more obscene in your head than anything you two have ever done previously — and you’ve done pretty much a lot.

“well”, you sigh in defeat, seems like the time has finally come, “today’s your lucky day”, you say as you get up from his lap and turn your back — a signal for him to unzip your dress — to which, of course, he immediately complies.

“as it should be”, his crafty fingers work the slider down, slowly peeling the dress off your body and letting it fall on the floor, followed by your lace thong and bra, “it’s my birthday after all”

“the way you always find a way to make things go your way gets on my nerves so much”, you turn around again and push him on the bed and slowly climb on top of him to straddle his chest.

“make a wish before you blow the candle”, you look down at him, your pussy close to his face, the scent of you tickling his nostrils, and he, instinctively almost, takes a deeper breath, rolling his eyes back and hissing with delight.

“freak”, you quickly look away, embarrassed, but he cups your cheeks, forcing you to look at him again, “i want you to look at me as you ride my face”, his voice comes out breathy, “will you do that for the birthday boy?”

you nod into his palms, “you’re insufferable” — “suffocate me then”, he coos through a grin, grabbing your knees to pull you forward until you’re above his face.

“jerk”, you say, but softly, as you lower your cunt on his willing mouth, landing your softness on his face in slow motion, immediately earning a throaty groan from him that shudders through your pussy lips.

satoru breathes deeply in and out with your heat on his mouth, the scent of you hitting his lungs and even below, reaching all the way down to his groin to further nurture his cock already throbbing in his slacks. his hand reaching down to unbuckle them slightly, to give more space for his hard-on to grow freely.

“mowe”, he muffles incoherently into your pussy, grabbing a handful of your ass cheeks to push you against his face, tilting his head up and down, jutting his jaw up and out to meet you.

you whimper at the friction, your clit bumping and rubbing against his nose as his lips are kissing your folds, his tongue slowly poking at your entrance with the tip before darting in — twirling around your walls — and out.

“nghh…s-sa-t-to—”, you barely cry out his name, tugging at his hair, mercilessly pulling him into your heat. as much as you hated to admit it, you loved this position. your embarrassment long gone and forgotten, you ride his face in a haze, your pussy getting wetter against his mouth and your movements — faster and harder each moment.

“heawen on my fongwue”, he groans. if he could speak properly right now, he would probably make the nastiest, dirtiest remarks, shamelessly walk you through every single thing he was feeling as you rocked your hips back and forth, grinding on his face. he would probably say something about your boobs, too. how they looked so pretty jiggling ever so slightly from the movement. he can’t speak right now, yes, but he can still get his thoughts reach you through actions — his hands run along your belly, gripping your breasts from below, squeezing and squishing them inside of his palms.

you clutch his hands with yours, “i can’t hold this position for too long”, and force them down on your hips for support. you hear him say something through a loud groan but it’s barely recognizable — most likely just him cursing “fuck” and “baby” from pleasure under your pussy, but also from the ego boost you just gave him — that he can make you weak but at the same time desperate enough to want to continue — despite your hips giving up — not only with his cock but his mouth alone, too.

you let him take over as you chase your high, weighing on his face as his hands grip on your hips, dictating your every move, composing the tune of your hips. his tongue is no more sliding in and out as he makes you grind harder on his face — it stays in, continuously licking your sweet spot clean.

“f-fuck, fuck, fuck…”, you curse loudly, reaching your hands to grab the head of the bed and hammer your pussy harder into his face, squeezing every last drop of strength left in your already cramping muscles until you cum, shuddering on his mouth.

“mfff”, he groans throatily into your hole, sucking and slurping your juices. his hips buck in the air, helplessly searching for friction to soothe his aching cock. his half-unbuckled pants are drenched with precum, leaking out from his tip through his boxers and out through the cloth of his pants, visibly staining them.

you can’t see but it’s easy to figure out from the way the bed bounces up and down as his ass meets the mattress after every time his hips fall down. “how cute”, you utter as you try to calm down your breathing, cunt still resting over his face.

his eyes are half closed, rolling back and hiding their blue away. all he needs is a little push, a little rub, you know it. you know it by the way his tongue has stopped moving inside you, by the way his hands have loosened the grip on your flesh, by the way his shortened moans have grown into one long and steady groan coming from the bottom of his throat — his entire brain solely focused on the muscles of his lower body that is searching, almost beggingly, for relief.

you lean your upper body back a little, just enough to make it easier to reach his shaft while still sitting on his face. “since you’re the birthday boy”, you drag your words out as you place your hand on his clothed cock, feeling the wetness that’s emerged from beneath against your palm, “i’ll give you a hand.”

his ass cheeks tense and squeeze as he presses his hips against your touch, ferociously rubbing his clothed cock on the flesh of your open palm. his groans get louder as he bucks his hips under your hand, pushing them up to meet your hand harder and faster each time — just the way he forces his cock into your tight cunt as he nears — until the last three thrusts that he always prolongs in order to properly and completely pump his seed out.

the inside of your hand feels hot against his clothed cock as he seeps himself out, the stickiness of his cum absorbing itself into the material of his pants and emerging through it to reach the skin of your palm.

you lift yourself up a little only to plop your body down next to his. his mouth, cheeks, chin, even his nose, are covered in his spit and your cum, all mixed in.

“shit, baby”, he laughs, breathing deeply in and out of his mouth, overwhelmed by the whole experience, “what the hell did you just do to me”

“do you really need me to verbalize what just happened”

“yes”

“no”, you slap his cheek with the back of your hand, softly, before rolling on your side to rest your head on the left side of his chest, kissing it tenderly. “happy birthday”

“it really is”, he whispers, tracing a heart shape over the skin of your exposed cheek with his fingertip, “with you, it always is”

“did your wish come true by any chance?”, you tilt your head to look at him.

“not yet. but i’ll work on it later tonight. for now, i’ll let you catch your breath”

“wait, wait.”, you raise a brow, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“my love”, he clears his throat, “do you remember how i said, when we first met, that you’d be the mother of my children?”

“yea? am i not?”

“children”, he stresses.

“oh.”, it finally hits you.

“one more to go”

[dragonspleenistasty]

Omg worldbuilding is so much fun, you have no idea how much stuff goes on in my head

[allaboutthemoonlight]

How to Build Self Discipline

Cultivating self-discipline is the way towards personal growth and achieving long-term goals. To me, it’s really all about making choices that honor your well-being and identity.

Understand that self-discipline is about self love and respect

It’s not about punishment or deprivation, but rather caring for yourself enough to make choices that align with your long-term well-being and goals.

You’re showing yourself the respect you deserve by honoring and committing to changes you want to make.

It’s all about recognizing your worth and having the motivation and courage to pursue what’s really best for you, even when it requires a lot of effort and decision-making.

Frame your identity in a way that includes discipline

How we act directly ties to our identities and how we believe we are. If you believe you’re a successful individual, you’ll live a life framed by confidence and determination. If you believe you’re someone who is lazy and unmotivated, you’ll struggle to find the drive to pursue your goals and aspirations.

Gaining discipline is all about acting as the person you believe you are and moving through life in a way that’s consistent with your determined identity. The key here is to try to imagine who you are at your highest self in a disciplined state of mind.

To start this, ask yourself these questions and slowly arrange your life in a way so there’s no distance between who you are now and your highest self:

What does your day look like

What do you eat

What do you wear

What does your week look like

What does your work day look like

What hobbies do you have

What’s your morning and night routine

Who are you surrounded by

What do you say yes and no to

Have systems in your life

I recently wrote a post about habits and mentioned the idea of systems versus goals. Here, I want to delve a bit deeper into that concept within the context of self-discipline.

To me, another way to truly live a disciplined life is to establish starting systems, something that will propel you past hurdles and reduce the friction that accompanies change.

Let’s say you want to improve your eating habits and cultivate discipline in consuming less sugar while incorporating more whole foods into your diet. You could begin by implementing a system of prepping healthy snacks or meals in advance at the start of each week, or however you see fit. By having these snacks readily available, you eliminate the need for decision-making, making it easier to adhere to your goal.

Anything that serves as a reminder or facilitates consistent action toward your desired outcome is a valuable system in your life.

Be okay with not doing something and embrace the mindset of small wins

This may seem paradoxical in the context of developing self-discipline, but being okay with not doing something is crucial. There are times in life when we need tough love and motivation, but there are also moments when compassion is the driving force that propels us forward.

When you don’t follow through with something, whether it’s going for a run or preparing a healthy dinner, it’s important to be okay with it. You don’t need to shame yourself or feel guilty for not taking action because that will only reinforce negative thought patterns, making it harder to create the change you desire.

Consider this: if you miss a planned run and spiral into self-criticism, you’re more likely to avoid running altogether. However, if you approach the situation with understanding and compassion, you’ll be more inclined to try again next time.

This is where small daily victories come into play. Sometimes, all we need is one small step forward to develop a new habit and maintain consistency. Whatever you're striving to improve or change, if it feels daunting, tell yourself, "Just for today, I'll do a 15-minute workout instead of the full hour," or "Just for today, I'll read 5 pages instead of the entire chapter," and celebrate these as small victories. Doing so not only helps you establish new habits but also allows you to acknowledge the progress you've made and the trust you've built within yourself.

—Luna