#you don’t know me? oh but you will after the heinous crimes that will put me on the news

[where-the-cicadas-sing]

If they don’t come back as dragons I’m going to jail

[waitimcomingtoo]

Just to Learn That You Never Cared

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Synopsis: always leaving class together to go fight crime leads people to think you’re dating when in reality you’re barely even friends. That is, until you agree to fake a relationship to keep your secret life a secret

requested/idea by @usoppsstar

Masterlist

“Oh, hey. Your girlfriend left this in class.” One of Peter’s classmates said as he tossed Peter a hoodie.

“Oh. Thanks.” Peter said before realizing what the person had said. He turned the hoodie over in his hands and recognized it as yours. His face warmed up in a blush when he realized you had just been mistaken for his girlfriend. He shoved the hoodie into his bag and wondered if he should tell you or not.

Peter saw you later that night on a rooftop you frequented often. You were in your suit, as was he, but had your mask sitting beside you. You were munching on a bag of chips and wordlessly extended them to him when he landed on the rooftop beside you. He smiled graciously and took a few before sitting down next to you. Your knees were touching but neither of you moved away.

“You left this in physics, dingus.” Peter said and handed you your hoodie.

“Oh, thanks. We had to run out of there so fast to save that lady. I must’ve left it behind.” You smiled gratefully and pulled it over your head. Peter felt bad that his high tech suit had built in heaters and your homemade suit was probably leaving you freezing every night. He wanted to suggest sharing his warmth, but he didn’t want to overstep.

“I know. Thank God she called the police on those kids for selling lemonade without a permit. I’m really glad we left a test to go witness that heinous crime.”

“It’s not all bad. We did get to see the cops arrest her for wasting their time by making a fake police report, which is always satisfying. And the kids gave us free lemonade. But I think calling it “homemade” was bullshit. I know Minute Maid when I taste it.” You replied, making Peter chuckle.

“You’re right. Both those things were enjoyable.” Peter agreed. “But I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I feel like we have to leave class every other day.”

“I know. Why did we have to pick a college in such a Karen ridden neighborhood?” You sighed.

“Because we wanted to go to the good school with the good science program. We should’ve known the neighborhood would be full of bored housewives who call the police whenever they have a minor complaint. It was our own hubris.”

“It was.” You chuckled and said looked over at him. You exchanged soft smiles before you looked over at the city horizon. Peters eyes never left you and he cleared his throat to get your attention.

“So, uh, my aunt and I were gonna get Chinese food later. At the place that got shut down for being a front for money laundering but that was really just a front for a second Chinese food chain.”

“Oh, I love that place.”

“Yeah. It’s great.” He nodded. “Anyways, you should totally come-“

Peter was cut off by the police radio he wired to his phone going off. He rolled his eyes and checked what the alert was.

“Damn it. Robbery at the bakery on 9th.” He told you.

“Lowkey, I’d do the same. Their cream puffs made me cream.” You said as you put your mask back on.

“Haha, yeah.” Peter chuckled. “Wait, what?”

“You should get some sleep. I’ll handle the robbery. But I’ll catch you tomorrow, Parker. Get home safe.” You saluted him before falling backwards off the building.

“I love you too.” Peter sighed.

“Did you say something?” You asked and popped back up.

“No.” Peter quickly lied.

“Okay. Well, see you tomorrow.” You waved to him and disappeared again. Peter let out another sigh before swinging home.

The next day, you ran after one of your classmates once class was let out.

“Hey, Carly. I emailed you my notes from the class you missed.” You told her.

“Thank you so much. You’re a life saver.” She replied. “Oh, and could you tell your boyfriend that band practice is in the gym today?”

“Yeah, sure. No problem.” You agreed. She was about to walk away when you realized what she had said.

“Wait, what am I saying?” You wondered. “Who’s my boyfriend?”

“You know. That guy with the prescription shoes.” Carly answered. You tilted your head in confusion until you realized you knew exactly who she was talking about.

“Wait, Peter?” You laughed in surprise. You expected her to laugh too and reveal she was just kidding but she looked completely serious.

“Oh, right. Peter. Why do I always think his name is Timmy?” Carly wondered.

“Because he looks like a Timmy. He gets it all the time.” You waved your hand. “And his shoes are not prescription. He just bought women’s platform shoes because he wanted to be taller and didn’t think anyone could tell.”

“We can.” Carly mumbled.

“I know.” You agreed. “But, I’m getting off topic. Timmy is not my boyfriend. I mean, Peter is not my boyfriend.”

“Whatever label you guys use, can you tell him that wind ensemble is meeting in the gym instead of the choir room? The sopranos kicked us out again to practice or do drugs or something.” Carly explained. You furrowed your eyebrows at her and tried to figure out if she was joking or not.

“The label? I’m so lost. Who told you that Peter’s my boyfriend?”

“Nobody told me.” She shrugged. “Everyone just knows that you guys are a couple.”

“Well how would they know something that isn’t true?” You asked and folded your arms.

“I mean, it’s not like you guys try to keep it a secret. Between all the whispering and staying close by each other. Plus you’re always sneaking out of class together or showing up late. And if one of you is absent, the other always is too. It’s been like that since high school. People just put two and two together I guess. Why, did you want to to be secret?”

“I didn’t want it to be anything. We’re not even dating.” You insisted and felt like you were going crazy.

“You don’t have to deny it.” Carly laughed. “I know feelings are weird and gross and stuff and you’ve never been the relationship type, but I think this guy is good for you. He brings something out in you. I don’t know. But you guys are cute. I love seeing the nice loser and assertive pretty girl troupe in real life.”

“Oh. Well, thank you.” You calmed down momentarily and smiled a little. Carly walked away and your smile quickly faded when you remembered what she had said. You looked around the hallway and saw another student holding an instrument.

“Hey. Band nerd.” You called out to him.

“Me?” He asked and pointed to himself.

“Yes, you. You had to let go of your saxophone case to point to yourself. Have you seen my boyfriend today?” You asked him.

“Peter? I haven’t seen him since yesterday in-“

“That sentence better not end with “wind ensemble” or I’m gonna lose it.”

“It was wind ensemble.” He said quickly.

“I’m leaving.” You shook your head and walked away from him. You pulled out your phone and went straight to your schools “campus sweethearts” page on instagram. Sure enough, there was a picture of you and Peter sitting next to each other right at the top of the page. You had your head thrown back laughing at something he was saying and he was looking at you fondly. You let out a shocked gasp and before walking out into the courtyard to look for Peter. You spotted him on a bench and smiled.

“Yes. Thank you, small campus”. You pumped your fist and went to sit next to him.

“Oh, hi. I was just thinking about you-“

“Someone is spreading a horrible rumor about you.” You cut him off.

“Oh no.” Peter frowned. “What is it? Is it bad?”

“Horrible.” You shook your head. “Peter, they’re saying you’re in wind ensemble.”

“Oh, I am.” Peter shrugged.

“Huh?”

“I play the clarinet . See. Clarinet.” Peter said and lifted up his little black clarinet case.

“Huh?” You said louder.

“I used to play in high school, pre-bite but post 9/11. I saw a flyer for orchestra on campus so I joined.”

“And you didn’t tell me?” You practically shouted. Peter knew you weren’t happy but felt strangely honored that you were so upset over him not telling you something about her personal life.

“Because I know how you feel about band nerds.” He replied. “And you and I don’t really talk about non-work related things. I didn’t think you’d care.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I care.” You insisted. “My rumored boyfriend has been in wind ensemble this whole time and I didn’t even know?”

“Wait, rumored boyfriend? Who, me?” Peter asked in surprised.

“So you didn’t know about this either?”

“No. I mean, someone did refer to you as my girlfriend the other day but I thought it was just an accident. People think you and me are dating?” Peter asked and tried not to look as pleased as he felt.

“Apparently. I’ve had multiple people refer to you as my boyfriend today. And look. We’re on the campus couples Instagram page.” You said and held up your phone.

“Ew. We have one of those?” Peter grimaced and took your phone to see the picture better.

“Yeah. I honestly think the principle runs it.” You replied. Peter was quiet as he stared at the picture for a while.

“What?” You wondered.

“Nothing. This just a cute picture of us. And I think the only picture of us.” He said with a shy smile. You frowned and looked at the picture again before realizing he was right.

“Carly said people think we’re dating since we’re always sneaking off together.” You told him. Peter thought out this for a minute and then made another connection.

“Ohhhh.” He said and nodded his head.

“What?”

“This explains why the boys congratulated me on the bus back to New York after the Washington monument trip for losing my virginity at a historic landmark.”

“You lost your virginity on that trip? To who?” You whispered harshly and felt jealousy burning through your veins.

“You, apparently.” He laughed. “You and I disappeared to get the glowy alien egg bomb thing back and I guess everyone assumed we were off desecrating a national monument.”

“Oh my God. That was like 3 years ago.” You realized. “People have thought we were dating this whole time? We need to put a stop to this.”

“Yeah. You’re right. Or…” Peter trailed off and gave you a look.

“Or?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Or, we lean into it.” He suggested. “We let people think it. We encourage it, even.”

“Why would we do that?”

“People have been suspicious about where we go and what we’re doing since high school. We can only fake so many illnesses and I ran out of grandparents to lie about the death of by junior year. So if people already made up a reason, maybe we should let them think that. We don’t have to go out of our way to confirm it but we can keep the assumption going to keep them from finding out what we’re really doing.”

“So you think we should let people think we’re dating so they stop wondering about what we’re always off doing?”

“That’s exactly what I just said, yes.” Peter nodded.

“Hey. Be nicer to your fake girlfriend.” You said and smacked his arm.

“I’m sorry. I will.” Peter blushed and rubbed his arm. You felt bad for hitting him and wrapped both arms around him to rub them up and down. He smiled softly at you and you sat in comfortable silence for a moment.

“You play the clarinet?” You asked after a minute.

“Squidward made it look so cool.” Peter shrugged.

“Did he?” You asked, making Peter laugh.

“No.” He admitted.

The next day, you and Peter walked to school together with the understanding that from then on out, you were going to play the part of a happy couple. You weren’t going to go around announcing it to everyone or anything. You just needed to convince the few that didn’t already believe the rumor and confirm things for the ones who did believe it.

“You ready for this?” You asked Peter as you stepped into campus.

“I think so. Maybe we should hold hands or something. You know, since people think we’re dating.” Peter suggested and tried to make it sound like it didn’t matter to him.

“I guess so.” You shrugged and held out your hand. Peter eagerly took your hand and took note of the way it fit in his like it was made for him.

“This is weird.” You whispered to him, popping his bubble.

“Why? Are my hands sweaty?” He panicked.

“No. Just really, really hot.” You told him. “It’s just weird that nobody seems to care that we’re holding hands right now.”

“I mean, we are just two random people with almost no social presence.”

“That’s true. I guess I just thought people would care more.” You admitted as you looked around the campus. No one was phased by you and Peter, but he was too busy enjoying the moment to realize it.

“Are you disappointed?” He asked you.

“Yeah. I wore my best bra because I thought I’d be getting more attention today.” You frowned and adjusted the strap of your bra.

“It’s okay. I’ll take one for the team and stare at your boobs.” Peter assured you.

“Aw. Thank you.” You gushed and gave his hand a squeeze.

You got to your physics class and sat together at your usual lab table. Peter looked around the classroom while you carried on as usual.

“Maybe I should put my arm around you. You know, to really convince people.” Peter suggested with a shy blush on his face.

“Is that really something people do?” You genuinely wondered. “I feel like I never see couples with their arms around each other.”

“Actually, I don’t think I have either. But let’s try it anyway.” He said and wrapped an arm around you. You scooted closer to him so that you could comfortably lean into him. You quickly realized you didn’t hate it and let out a content sigh.

“Hm.” Peter made a little noise at the back of his throat.

“What?” You asked him.

“Our height difference makes this hurt my shoulder.” He leaned over to whisper in your ear.

“Then move your arm.” You whispered back.

“I can’t. I just wrapped it around you. It’ll look weird if I immediately take it off.” Peter said as he covered behind him to see who was looking.

“Or, consider this. Nobody in this entire city, and dare I say world, cares where your arm is right now.” You whispered harshly.

“Fine. I’ll remove it. But I have to give a reason.” He told you before loudly clearing his throat.

“Ah. Sorry, babe. I can’t cuddle you right now. My arm is sore from band practice.” Peter said loud enough for everyone in the classroom to hear him. You hung your head in shame and heard people murmuring about his strange comment.

“Oh God.” Peter gulped. “People are looking. They’re gonna know something is up. I have to put it back.”

He went to put his arm back around you but you stopped him before he could draw any more attention to the two of you.

“Just do this.” You whispered to him and pulled his stool closer to you and turned towards him a little. Your knees and were touching and you were now facing each other.

“That’s it? No one can even see this.” Peter said in disappointment. He thought being your fake boyfriend would bring you guys closer but you were sitting the way you always sat in class.

“It’s not about what people can see. It’s about proximity.” You explained. “We’re sitting closer together than anyone else is without being egregious about it. It’s a simple touch. If we’ve been together as long as people think we have, we don’t need to be wrapped around each other all the time. A simple touch to let the other know we’re there is all we need.”

Peter was silent as he stared at you following your explanation. He stared for so long that you felt yourself blush under the eye contact.

“What?” You asked him.

“I like the way you explain things.” Peter said simply. You quickly looked down so he wouldn’t see the effect that comment had on you and took a moment to collect yourself.

“It’s just something I thought of.” You shrugged.

“I know. But I never would have thought of that. Especially not as naturally as it did for you. You’re so quick.”

“Thank you.” You laughed shyly and found yourself unable to look away from him. Peter opened his mouth to say something to keep the momentum rolling but his phone interrupted him.

“Shoot. Sus-tivity on the b bridge.” He whispered.

“What the hell does that mean?” You asked at full volume.

“It means there’s suspicious activity on the Brooklyn bridge.” He rolled his eyes. “We have to act fast so I didn’t have time to say the whole thing.”

“But you just said the whole thing. And the abridged version. So it took twice as long.”

“Shh.” He waved his hand. “We gotta go.”

You reluctantly collected your things and took Peter’s hand to pull him out of his seat. Peter followed you out the classroom but the teacher cleared her throat when you walked by.

“And where are you two going?” She asked. You and Peter exchanged looks as the class snickered and murmured their theories about what exactly you were heading off to do.

“I’m sorry, Dr. Pepper. My girlfriend and I have to leave class unexpectedly. Please excuse us. It’s urgent.” Peter’s said politely.

“I bet it’s urgent, Parker.” A boy snickered, making serval classmates laugh.

“Gross.” You wrinkled your noses and looked at the boys in disdain.

“Fine.” The teacher sighed. “The only reason I don’t write you two up for skipping so often is because you somehow have the best grades in the class. Go on. Just get the homework done.”

“We will.” You assured her before leaving the room with Peter. Peter noticed that you didn’t drop his hand even when you were alone in the hallway.

“Hey, you know that teachers name is Dr. Zhang and not Dr. Pepper, right?” You asked him.

“Oh my God.” Peter gasped. “Is it really? I’ve emailed her so many times and said “Dear Dr. Pepper”. We have to drop out.”

You laughed and held his hand the rest of the way out of the building.

That night, Peter laid in his bed with his phone held close to his face. He had been trying to figure out what to text you to let you know he had been thinking of you.

“I had fun fighting crime with you today” He wrote out. He read it over before scrunching his nose.

“No. Too cringe. She is not gonna fall in love with someone that says “fighting crime”. I’m not Paw Patrol.” He said like it was obvious. He deleted his text and thought of another one.

“I had a good time today, we make a good team” He wrote out instead. He read it a few times until he found issue with it.

“Oh, you had a good time stopping those break dancers that were obstructing that Sbarro? That’ll catch her attention.” Peter said sarcastically and deleted the text.

“have a goodnight :)” He typed out and then shook his head.

“No. Wayyyy too horny.” He sighed and deleted it again.

“night” He wrote out and read it a few times.

“This is good. I can work with this.” He nodded. He was about to workshop it when a text from you popped up.

“pick a color” It said. Peters heart skipped a beat at the vague message and replied with the first color that popped into his head.

“blue”

“thank u” You wrote back within seconds. Peters heart stopped pounded and the disappointment that the conversation was over settled in. After all these years of fighting crime together, you two never really managed to make it past the coworkers stage. He was desperate for more but never knew how to get there.

“no homo but I had fun fighting crime with you today” You suddenly texted again. A smile tugged at Peter’s lips and he touched his as if it were your face.

“ok paw patrol” He wrote back. Back in your room, you were laughing at his text and trying to think of a witty reply.

“ur mad bc you know I’m the chase 🐶” You texted him.

“if ur the Chase then who am I?”

“plssss ur such a marshall” You wrote back.

“but that’s the third most important dog :(“ Peter replied.

“well yes but he’s cute and wears red so the little paw patrol shoe fits” You answered. A blush painted Peters cheeks over you calling him cute but he didn’t want to read too much into it.

“Im wearing red right now😳” He texted back.

“oh I bet you are” You answered, making him laugh. He kept the conversation going for about an hour before duty called once again. Peter groaned and put his suit on before swinging to the scene of the crime. He met you there and stopped the crime before stopping on a nearby rooftop to rest.

“These burglars aren’t very considerate of our sleep schedules. Who robs a Jersey Mikes after midnight? Or, like, ever?” Peter huffed as he tugged his mask off.

“I know. They’re always at inconvenient times. I was in the middle of painting my nails.”

“Can I see?” He asked in a soft voice. You pulled your gloves off and held out your hand for him to see.

“Look. Blue. But I only got half way through before Mike’s was targeted.”

“It’s okay. They still look pretty.” Peter complimented you with a soft smile.

“Thanks. You picked a good color.” You replied.

“What do you mean?” He frowned.

“I told you to pick a color. This is why.” You explained and held out your hand again. His eyes lit up at this new information and he took your hand to see your nails closer.

“You let me chose your nail color?” He smiled fondly.

“Well I didn’t know what to chose so I thought I’d ask the audience.” You shrugged and felt shy all of the sudden.

“Oh. And I’m the target audience, huh?” Peter smirked and turned towards you.

“I never said target.” You teased him and shoved him shoulder.

“I must be hearing things, then.” He shrugged as you both smiled.

“Yeah. Must be.” You said in a soft voice as you stared into his eyes. Peter gulped before making a bold move and taking your hand again under the guise of looking at your nails.

“Look at you. You even got my favorite shade.” He noted.

“You like “Eating For Blue”?” You pretended to gasp.

“Is that really the name of the color?” He laughed.

“Uh huh. It was apart of Essie’s baby fever collection. I almost chose “All In Blue Time” but that’s one tends to get little air bubbles and they give me agida. And I used to have “A Dream Come Blue” but it rolled under the sink so it belongs to the dust bunnies now.” You shrugged as you checked out your nails.

“Wow. This is all new information to me. So, are all nail polish colors named after puns and wordplay?” He asked as he stared into your eyes. He didn’t really care, but he was finally getting somewhere with you and didn’t want it to end.

“In my experience, yes. Not always color related wordplay but always something that makes you go yeah, I guess this shade of beige is what the word “ladylike” would be as a color.”

“This is blowing my mind right now.” Peter chuckled.

“You mean blue-ing your mind.” You corrected and tapped the side of your head.

“I think you inhaled too many of those fumes. Because that was not funny.” Peter said through a laugh.

“What?” You pretended to be offended. “You’re literally laughing right now. I’m so funny.”

“You are.” Peter admitted when his laughter died down. You stared into eyes for a minute before smiling.

“Is that what you rumored saw in me?” You asked him.

“Probably.” He chuckled. “I also heard a rumor that I think you’re really pretty. Like, the prettiest girl I was ever rumored to have allegedly seen.”

“Now you’re the one who’s looney from the fumes because that’s a straight up lie. I know you’ve seen prettier girls because I was standing right next to you when Anne Hathaway left that diner.” You said without making eye contact with him. Things were moving a little too fast and you needed it hit the brakes for a second.

“Oh, yeah. You’re right.” Peter forced a laugh and awkwardly looked over at the cityscape when he realized you were politely telling him to pull back.

“But I appreciate it.” You said after a beat of silence.

“Of course. Sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking saying that.” He laughed nervously. “I was just getting caught up in the fake dating. We’ve been doing it for so long that it felt real.”

“We only started this morning.” You reminded him.

“Right. Well, it’s late. I’m gonna go home.” He said quickly and stood up. He had just blown that and needed to leave as quickly as possible.

“Okay. Goodnight. See you at school.” You called after him. Peter swung home with tears in his eyes and went straight to bed, missing your text about having fun fighting another crime.

The next day at school, Peter decided to start over and push last night from his mind. He played the part of your boyfriend to the best of his abilities and opened every door, pulled out every seat, and carried ever book for you all day long. Then he did it the next day, and the day after that. He kept his mouth shut about his feelings day in and day out no matter how painful it was getting. You and Peter had finally moved past the coworker stage and become real friends so he didn’t want to sabotage it all by telling you that he spent his days wishing for more.

“What are your plans tonight?” You asked him one day as you walked out of class together.

“My aunt is going out with her friends so I was probably gonna watch a movie on my couch. But on my laptop with my earbuds in. Likely in my boxers. Likely with an entire package of Twizzlers. Why?”

“Well I was gonna suggest that we hang out but you sound booked.”

“Really? You want to hang out?” Peter asked with much more enthusiasm than he intended.

“If you want. I’m not doing anything as exciting as boxers and Twizzlers.”

“I would love to. I’ll put on pants for you. I promise.”

“Sounds good.” You laughed. “Text me your address, okay?”

“Sure. Or you could walk with me now. Unless you’re tired of me and need a break before we hang out.” Peter suggested as you left campus together.

“It’s funny you say that. I was just telling my mom the other day that I never get tired of you.” You said casually.

“You..you don’t?” Peter’s face heated up as he followed you down the sidewalk.

“I don’t. I usually need a break from other people if we’ve been together awhile but it’s different with you. It doesn’t feel like I’m using my social battery if that makes sense.“

“It makes sense.” He smiled shyly as your hands bumped against each others. He was about to make a bold move and take your hand despite no one being around but you suddenly moved it to hit the crosswalk button.

Back at Peter’s apartment, he awkwardly gave you a tour and wished he had picked up his clothes before leaving the house that morning. You didn’t seem to mind the socks and boxers strewn across his room because you were too focused on all the little things he kept on his shelves. You picked up a picture frame of your freshman year high school class that had you and Peter seated right next to each other. Your friendship had only just begun so you often forgot how long you knew him for.

“So this is your room.” You smiled and put the picture back.

“Yup. This is where the magic happens.” Peter said and immediately cringed at himself.

“Oh really?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah. This is where I practice magic. Wanna see?” He asked and picked up a deck of cards. You laughed and went over to take one.

“Is your card the ace of spades?” He asked.

“Queen of hearts.” You snorted and turned the card around.

“You’re the queen of my heart.” He whispered.

“Did you say something?” You asked as you looked at all his Legos.

“I asked what you wanted to do tonight.” He lied.

“I don’t know. We have the place to ourselves. We could do something rated R.” You said with a coy smile.

“Like what?” Peter gulped.

“Watch an R rated movie, you perv. Your aunt isn’t here to stop you.”

“You remember me telling you that I’m not allowed to watch R rated movies in the living room anymore?” Peter blushed at you remembering something he had randomly told you long ago.

“Are you referring to the time you watched Tusk at full volume while she had her friends from work over for the first time? How could I forget?”

“In my defense, I didn’t know what the movie was about. And I didn’t think her friends were gonna come into the living room and see that guy getting turned into a walrus.”

“Yeah, the title and cover art gave no indication that the movie would end that way. But that’s not a bad idea actually. Let’s watch something scary.”

“Okay.” Peter agreed and followed you out into the living room. He turned off the lights and got some snacks while you picked a movie. He hated scary movies but he was not about to tell you that. Instead, he sat on the couch beside you as a respectful distance and handed you a bag of chips. As the movie went on, you got closer and closer to each other. Peter had never really seen you scared before but you were practically in his lap just 40 minutes into the movie. You reached into the bag of chips at the same time as Peter and your fingers touched. You both froze and looked at each other as your faces heated up.

“Shit. I’m not wearing a condom.” Peter sighed, making you yank your hand out and laugh.

“You’re stupid.” You laughed and turned back to the movie just as a jump-scare happened. You screamed and jumped closer to Peter.

“This is so scary. Why did I pick this movie?” You asked as you drew your knees up and leaned into his side.

“Yeah, same.” He replied, not even listening. He couldn’t hear anything over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. You were cuddled into his side with your head on his shoulder and knees in his lap with a blanket drawn up to your nose. He knew you were only cuddling him because you were scared but it didn’t even matter at that point. The movie went quiet for a minute and then made a loud sound, sending you to burry your face into Peter’s neck.

“Tell me when it’s safe to come out.” You whispered into his ear. Peter gulped and wrapped an arm around you to fully protect you from the movie.

“I will.” He said in a soft voice. You peaked your head out a few minutes later but stayed nestled into Peter’s side. You realized his arm was around you and smiled a little.

“Oh, this isn’t so bad.” You shrugged as the main character got eaten alive.

“I don’t understand you.” Peter chuckled and looked down at you. You laughed as well as you looked into his eyes. He was about to say something when another sharp sound from the movie caused you to jump.

“Hold my hand.” You blurted and grabbed his hand. Peter happily accepted and clasped your hand before holding it under his chin. You stayed in that position for a long time and watched the movie. You were both so focused on the screen that you didn’t hear May opening the front door and coming in.

“Hey. I’m home.” She said, making you both scream.

“Oh, hi May.” Peter greeted while he realized it was just her.

“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Parker. I’m-“

“I know.” She smirked. “I’ll just be in my room. But, Peter?”

“Yeah?”

“No going in your room with the door closed, okay? I’m home. And we have thin walls. Just keep that in mind.” She said, making Peter turn bright red.

“Got it, May.” He mumbled. She winked at you and disappeared into her bedroom.

“You told your aunt we were dating?” You whispered to Peter in confusion.

“No.” Peter answered honestly. “I guess she just assumed we were.”

“Wow. She’s just like the kids at school.” You shook your head. “I don’t get it. Why does everyone think we’re dating?”

“I mean…” Peter trailed off and looked down at your clasped hands. You hadn’t realized you were still cuddling and quickly jumped off of him. Peters heart sank and the longer he sat in the absence of your body heat, the more upset he felt.

“You just jumped off of me like I was sharp.” He said without looking at you.

“I didn’t want your aunt to see us cuddling and think-“

“And think what?” He snapped, cutting you off. You gutted your head back in surprise and let out a nervous laugh.

“Woah. What’s going on with you? She already knows about your secret life. We don’t have any reason to pretend we’re dating in front of her.”

Peter stared at you for a long time as the word “pretend” cut into him like a knife. Every time he thought you were going somewhere, he was reminded that it didn’t actually mean anything to you.

“Yeah. You’re right.” He mumbled and looked at the movie again. You kept your eyes on him and felt guilty. You had so much to say to him but you felt unable to speak.

“Peter-“

“I don’t think we should pretend to date anymore.” He blurted, cutting you off once again. Your eyebrows went up in surprise and you got a sick feeling in your tummy that you had just ruined something really important.

“What? Why not?”

“It’s stupid. No one even cares anymore.” He shrugged. “We don’t have to fake a breakup or anything but I don’t want to hold hands or play along anymore. I’m done.”

“What changed?” You asked in a soft voice. He was still looking at the movie while you were fully turned to face him.

“Nothing changed. That’s the problem.” He said and angrily got off the couch. You quickly caught his hand and he stopped. He looked down at the ground and let out a sigh. He knew it wasn’t fair to be mad at you if he hadn’t told you what was wrong. He slowly turned around and looked at you.

“Five years ago, you showed up to the same robbery at an all night CVS that I was at and I realized we knew each other from AP Spanish class because I had asked you earlier that day how to conjugate “poner” and you said “pusiste” and I laughed because I thought you were joking but you weren’t and then that night you heard me tell the burglar that he better“pusiste” the money back into the register.“ Peter began.

“Okay. Wow. That was a really long sentence.” You laughed softly. “But I remember that. I laughed and told you that you better remember that for the test.”

“You did. That’s how I knew it was you.” He smiled at the memory. “I failed that test, by the way. I still can’t conjugate “poner.” And I still think it means “boner” even though I know it’s a verb. But anyway, that night, I couldn’t sleep because I was so excited to have met you. Even though we technically already knew each other, that night put us in each others radars. I could not believe that I had met my match. You’re into science like me and sarcastic like me and you understand this side of my life because you have the same side. But despite running into each other on patrol almost nightly and seeing each other around school, I barely got you to notice me. I don’t think you even knew my name until we ended up going the same college. You called me “Timmy” all throughout high school.”

“You seriously look like one. It’s uncanny. I don’t know what it is.”

“I thought things would change when I found out we were going to the same college. The campus is so small I figured there’s no way we wouldn’t become friends. But even then, we hardly ever talked and when we did it was always about work. I didn’t even know where you lived until last semester.”

“I remember that too. The first night we really bonded was when you fell off that roof because you were trying to show me how to do a backflip.”

“Yeah, I’ve never been able to do a backflip.” He admitted. “I only said I could because you said you always wanted to learn how to do one and I assumed given my abilities I’d be able to do one if I just followed my body. But I busted my ass and you were kind enough to sneak me through your window and patch me up with some Scooby Doo bandaids.”

“It was all I had.” You shrugged.

“And you gave it to me anyway. Because you’re kind and compassionate and I’m just…I’m crazy about you.” Peter finally admitted. “I was so excited when we started hanging out more this semester but it always ended up crushing me when I remembered that we just doing it to keep people from finding out the truth. I really, really love our friendship and if I’m ruining it all by saying all this then at least I can die with it off my chest.”

“Wait, now I’m confused. Are you dying?”

“Maybe.” He shrugged. “It feels like I am every time you and I start to get close and then I remember this is all pretend for you.”

“So it’s not pretend for you?” You asked quietly. Peter stared into your heads for a minute and then shook his head.

“No. I was never pretending. I like you.” He told you. Your facial expression didn’t change as you stared back at him. Peter was really starting to panic until a smile tugged at your lips.

“Sit back down.” You told him.

“I’m sat.” He said and rushed it sit down. You nestled back into his side and laid your head down on his shoulder. Peter smiled and rested his head on top of yours, finally pleased with the way a conversation with you went. You both turned your attention back to the movie just in time for it to end.

“Hm.” You huffed. “That was supposed to be us symbolically finishing the movie as a real couple but it appears we’ve already arrived at the credits. Now what?”

“We could watch Tusk.” Peter suggested at the same time you said “We could make out.”

“I never actually saw Tusk but I always wanted to.” You gasped and hit his arm with excitement.

“Or we could do your thing.” Peter forced a laugh and tried not to sound as desperate as he felt.

“Let me see if I can find it.” You said as you scrolled through the streaming services on his TV.

“Or we could do your thing.”

Tag List 🏷️

@thebookwormlife @imanativeofswlondondahling

@tom-hollands-wifey

@whatareyouhidingpeter @takenbyheartstrings

@imyourliquor-youremypoison @andreasworlsboring101

@peterparkoure

@justcallmehitgirl @jackiehollanderr

@emmamarshmellow @unbelievableholland

@sovereignparker @every-marveler-ever @undiadeestos @eridanuswave​ ​

@solarxmoonchild @canyouevencauseicant

@quaksonhehe @lovelessdagger

@thesuitelifeofafangirl @marshxx @nooneinvitedfascistbarbie

@maybemona

@alexxcorona113 @lethal-wisdom

@pandaxnienke

@itsemohours

@freakofmusic25 @tomholland85

@olixerwxxd @leilanixx

@whereismytelephone @so-very-asleep @white-wolf1940

@spideyspeaches @hihiweezing

@mathletemadison  

@dhtomholland @insomniac-nerd-posts-things @prancerrparkerr

@hallecarey1 @adayasgeorgia @blackwidowisthebest @imawhoreforu

@ciarahollands

@nellabellaa @pinklxmonade @boogywoogywoogy

[odditycircus-2002]

Mortal Kombat 1 Intros Part IV

A/N: I'm a fan of The Boys and have been watching the newest episodes of season 4. Of course, I love to hate Homelander, and it's satisfying to watch fatalities performed on him in Mortal Kombat 1 after watching him perform heinous crap. This led me to watch his intros and then other Mortal Kombat character intros, and inspiration hit! So I hope y'all like this.😁

Oh! And for those of you that are new, the reader here is a Gorgon, meaning snake hair and wears a mask since they can turn people into stone. They also happen to be an Imperial Healer with a bit of a dark side. Hope that helps!😁

Batch I

Batch II

Batch III

Homelander

Y/N: You are not a god. You’re simply, bad product.

Homelander: You’ll be praying to me for mercy soon enough.

/

Y/N: Why should I give you respect when it’ll only go to the bottomless gaping pit of insecurity you call a soul?

Homelander shivers sarcastically: Should I be intimidated by you?

/

Y/N thoughtfully: Perhaps a virus is in order...

Homelander scoffs: A God is above something so insignificant to him.

/

Homelander: What's with the ridiculous mask? Are you trying to cosplay as some D-List Supe?

Y/N: Why don't you take it off and find out?

/

Homelander: Pray to all the “gods” you want, you won’t survive against me.

Y/N: Why assume that I pray to any of them?

/

Homelander incredulously: You actually want to fuck that disgusting freak?!

Y/N with snakes out ready to bite: Unlike you, Baraka doessssn't fill me with revulsion at the sight of him!

Omni-Man

Y/N: One look and this should be over, fast.

Omni-Man: I'll break your neck before you can even get a peek at me.

/

Y/N: Having been betrayed by a cccccharlatan lover before, I know your wife would want you dead.

Omni-Man angrily: You're not her, so your point means nothing.

/

Y/N cautiously: Your medicine could treat Tarkat?

Omni-Man: If you comply and pledge your allegiance to the Empire, all your patients may receive Viltrum care.

/

Omni-Man: You have stupidly condemned your patients to death!

Y/N: I would rather have my heart ripped out than be fooled twiccccce by a charlatan!

/

Omni-Man: Think it over; what will you have serving a diseased ruler and others with her plague for 500 years?

Y/N: I will have no regrets pursuing my lifelong dream.

/

Omni-Man: I'll rip your damn head off in under a minute.

Y/N ominously: Rest assured, this fight will be a real Scourge.

Raiden

Y/N: Are you aware that Madam Bo's special tea is local around my canton?

Raiden: How in the world did she acquire it then?

/

Y/N: I would’ve paid all the koins in Outworld to have seen you absolutely humiliate Shao.

Raiden: I sense you and him never got along.

/

Y/N: I can confidently say that you’re healing up nicely since we fought the Dragon Army.

Raiden: I’m not sure I would’ve survived without your medical care.

/

Raiden: It must be hard being The Colony's lead Healer.

Y/N: Everyone who dies under my care is a blow to my soul.

/

Raiden: Why is there a statue of Kung Lao in the Wu Shi’s Courtyard?

Y/N shrugs: Kung Lao mentioned how he always wanted a statue of himself.

/

Raiden: You’re very different from how your Titan self acts.

Y/N shivers in disgust: I should thank Liu Kang for not having me predestined for Shang Tsung.

/

Raiden: You only have yourself to blame for missing your chance with Y/N.

Shang Tsung chuckles: You say that as if I don’t still have a chance to win them back.

Kung Lao

Y/N: So far, I don’t see any signs of Tarkat but there’s still a chance you could spread it without apparent symptoms.

Kung Lao: You are not putting my mind at ease, at all.

/

Y/N: You’re inviting me? I don’t even know if I’m able to stomach regular food anymore.

Kung Lao: It would be a crime if you didn’t get to try Madam Bo’s cooking at least once!

/

Y/N: How did you not loose any fingers when you first made that hat???

Kung Lao smugly: Through much practice and much skill

/

Kung Lao: I beaten you in our last fight, so what will change here?

Y/N mischievously: This time, I’m not holding back.

/

Kung Lao: Can you believe that the Wu Shi have a trap dungeon?

Y/N hisses in amusement: Who knew the Shaolin were so diabolical?

/

Kung Lao: You and Baraka aren’t a couple???

Y/N sighs wistfully: How I wish that to be true…

/

Baraka: I don’t always understand what Y/N sees in me.

Kung Lao: You definitely have something more than Shang Tsung.

Kenshi

Y/N: I am sorry I couldn't have saved your sight.

Kenshi: You did the best anyone could in that situation.

/

Y/N: What is it like using Sento to see?

Kenshi: It’s like when you stare at a flame and look away, you see the light of the flame even though it’s gone.

/

Y/N: According to Earthrealm myths, the closest to describing my current form is a “Gorgon”.

Kenshi: Perhaps that’s because there have been other gorgons before.

/

Kenshi: I don’t know Y/N, that seems a bit excessive even by the Yakuza’s standards.

Y/N: You and Kitana think a bit of food tampering is too much.

/

Kenshi in surprise: You and Shang Tsung weren’t just lab partners?

Y/N angrily: I was a fool to fall for his charmssss in the first place!

/

Kenshi: Given how you both act around one another, I'm surprised you and Baraka aren't together.

Y/N: I'm grateful to have him in my life.

/

Kenshi: The Colony is fortunate to have you and Y/N.

Baraka: I thank Deliah every day for sending them my way.

[ventisnumberone]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ You can service me..in a different way.. ੈ

Tartaglia x Maid! Reader

Synopsis: Your a maid who works at one of the hotels of Liyue, your job is usually pretty boring but there’s rumors of a strong, handsome and dangerous Fatui Harbinger staying in the nicest suite of the hotel.

(lowercase intended 🤬)

Tags: modernish au! this is gonna be 𝓕𝓡𝓔𝓐𝓚𝓨. afab reader, dub-con i think?, impact play, praise, degrading, semi-public(?), pussy eating, fingering, breeding, claiming, lowkey blackmailing,squirting, you call him sir, childe is a degenerate 😒, reader is lowkey a bimbo, one misogynist, picture taking with out permission, prostitution if you wanna call it that i guess?

ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩

You were just a simple little maid with a simple life cleaning up after people paying high amounts of money to stay in Liyue’s number one hotel. Who knew rich people were so dirty? You have to put with these snobs bullshit everyday without blowing a fuse. You just smile and do what your asked no matter how frustrating it is, and it is. Always dealing with gross old men commenting on your cliche maid outfit, and how fitting it is they put a woman like you for the job of cleaning up after them. the only joy you get out of this job is hearing about the vast range of people who check into the hotel. it can go from a dilf on vacation who all your other hotel staff friends are thirsting over to those gross ‘creepy serial killer’ vibe people. However today there was talk about a person who rented out the most expensive suite, the staff has suspected this mystery man is a harbinger for the fatui. You scoff at the thought of a crazed murderer staying at your place of work. You didn’t want to believe this guy was actually that dangerous and capable of doing such heinous crimes but you kept an open mind. Two days passed of the mystery man checking in had gone by and rumors were spreading faster and faster. People have been saying he smells like blood and are scared to service his room. In the break room the maids are gossiping about how attractive he is but are too afraid to clean his room. your ears perked up at their conversation, it was still early in the morning so you had been sipping on some tea and browsing a newspaper sitting on the sofa in the room. Three maids were shamelessly talking about this poor man when you had enough and butt in saying, “y’know if you guys want me too i can go up to his floor and just clean his room if you guys don’t want to? i don’t mind at all.” you say nonchalantly. they share a look before they nod giving you a slightly concerned look. ‘What’s the big deal? why are they making such a fuss about this guy..? they are saying how hot he is one second and then the next how scary he is..’ you think mentally rolling your eyes. a few minutes pass and your done with your coffee and you go to grab a cleaning cart and make your way to the elevator. As you climb up the floors anxiety starts to set in. ‘why am i getting nervous he’s just a normal guy…everyone is just freaking out…calm down y/n…’ you think while slightly chewing on your bottom lip subconsciously.

you finally reach the top floor of the hotel and the elevator doors open, you push your cart to the end of the hallway. you realize there’s only 1 occupied room on this floor so that must be his. you reach the door of the man’s room and you notice their isn’t a card on the door saying no to cleaning service so you unlock the door with your key. you gingerly push the door open and see a tall, muscular ginger staring at you. “oh-! sorry-! i didn’t know anyone was in here-! so sorry..” you stammer as your cheeks flush. you didn’t expect the man everyone was talking about to be so…hot? you go to leave but the man speaks up. “you don’t have to leave you know..you can clean or whatever i just am doing work..so i really don’t mind.” he says a slight smile tugging at his lips. you could have sworn he looks you up and down. “uh..okay? as long as you don’t mind..i’ll be quick.” you say pulling your cart into the room. you begin cleaning and the man begins to fill out papers. you start sweeping the floor and emptying trash cans. you’ve only cleaned a room with a guest present once before so this was a pretty awkward situation. you bent down slightly to grab a bit of trash off of the floor unintentionally giving the man a full view of your white lacey panties. the man looks over at you and blushes slightly. Unknowingly you continue cleaning. you start to make the bed when you look over at the man who’s physique looks so good from the back. unfortunately your staring at him for a little too long and he notices and turns around to look at you. “you know…it’s rude to stare dear..” he says with a faux pout. “oh-! n-no i wasn’t trying to- i was just spacing out-!” you say with a stutter trying to justify your actions. the man gets up from the desk and walks over to you and tilts your chin up with his hand to make you look up at him. you look up at through your eyelashes and a blush dusts your cheeks. “i see you bending over for me dear, your not very slick…how about you remove those pretty panties of yours for me? hmm?” he says with a smirk. “wh-what-? i can’t do that-!” you say taken aback by his words and charisma. you consider it, but just show him a shocked expression. “hmm..no fun..how about this? what if i give you an extra ‘tip’..if you do this for me, how does that sound?” he says winking. your mouth falls open slightly and you glance down to his crotch to reveal a tent in his trousers. “oh what a dirty mind you have…i wasn’t talking about that kind of tip..but if you want that i can have that arranged.” he says pulling out a leather wallet and pulling out a large sum of mora. “sir…i can’t take your money..i will admit you are very handsome but this goes against our policy..” you say bitting on your bottom lip nervously. “i won’t tell if you won’t girlie…” he says with that same devilish smirk. “fine…but i could get into serious trouble for this-!” you say before grabbing the mora from him and skidding your panties off your hips and balling them up in your hands. the man holds his hand out gesturing you to give them to him so you comply. you’ve never been with a guy with this much dominance and overall confidence. “you can continue cleaning…i’ll just be here watching…” he says look at you admiring your curves. you go over to the bed to finish making it, you feel the cold wind from the ac graze your bare pussy and you whine a little at the feeling of being so exposed. you can’t help but feel your core tighten around nothing as you think about what this guy will do to you in the awaiting moments.

you finish making the bed and you notice the man get up from the chair he’s sitting in. he walks over towards you and grabs your hips from behind and bends over to whisper in your ear. “y’know girlie…your really starting to turn me on…and i can see you getting wetter by the second..how about i do you a favor and make your cute little pussy feel good? would you like that?” he says, his hot breath tickling your ear. “y-yes sir-” you say before he roughly flips you on your back and spreads your thighs apart lifting your dress a bit to reveal your glistening cunt on display. he dips one of his long fingers into your hole earning a whimper from you. he leans his head into your cunt to lick a long stripe on your pussy, he adds a second finger into your hole and gives your clit a kiss. he wraps his lips around your little bud and sucks on it lapping his tongue on it. your thighs are wrapping around his head and your tugging at his gorgeous ginger hair. your squirming and moaning out for him. he lifts his head up removing his lips from your clit to deliver a harsh smack to your thigh. “stop squirming so much.” he says glaring at you. you stop moving around and pout. he gives his attention back to your pussy. he curls his fingers inside you hitting that spot inside of you that makes you scream. you haven’t had that spot hit before, this guy is an expert. you start babbling nonsense, your head feels foggy and you scream feeling your release approaching. “s-sir-! i’m gonna-! agh fuck~!” you moan out. “there you go baby…cum on my fingers…” he coos with that signature smirk. your vision goes white as your release hits you like a truck, you squirt for the first time and drool runs down your chin. you have a death grip on the sheets of the used to be made bed. you pant as your vision restores. you chest heaves as you look at the ginger between your legs. “ahh..i’m sorry-! didn’t mean to do that…” you pant. “it’s all good girlie…you taste delicious by the way..such a good girl.” he says sitting up. “now i think it’s your turn to service me huh?” he unbuttons his shirt, and takes off his belt and sliding his trousers down. you remove your dress following his lead. your sitting up on the bed admiring his physique. “ tsk tsk..girlie you know it’s rude to stare…how about we do something about your naughty behavior..yeah?” he says before flipping you over on the bed so your on your stomach and face is buried into the pillows. you feel him unclip your bra and pull it off you before he pulls his boxers down. “are you ready girlie?” you feel his tip brush your folds. “y-yes…s-sir..” you mutter. you feel his large cock enter you and you gasp. you didn’t know he was this big. he pushes the rest of his length into your hole. he waits a second before beginning to move letting you get adjusted to his length. a few seconds pass before he slowly starts thrusting. he grabs your hips to steady himself.

“oh my- god- sweetie your so tight..!” he groans. “if i didn’t know any better i would think your a virgin…fuck-! but- hah~ then again your still so slutty~ so..you can’t be one~..” he groans as he thrusts faster into you. you can’t help but moan at his harsh words. “i can feel you clenching your cunt on my cock~ slut~!” he teases. he continues to fuck you hard. his cock hitting your g-spot making you scream. “ah..fuck girlie i’m gonna-” he says before cumming deep inside you. “s-sir-! i’m gonna c-cum-” you scream. “call me tartaglia slut.” he says rubbing your clit. you heart sinks at the name. the rumors were true. your being fucked by a fatui harbinger. “what’s the matter? finally figure out who i am? hm?” he says pinching your clit. “tar-tartaglia~! oh my fuck-!” you squeeze your eyes tight before cumming around his cock. your a cock drunk babbling mess, drool dripping down your chin. staining the pillows, your hair is messy and your too fucked out to care you just got railed by a murderer. “cmon let’s get you cleaned up..and by the way..i took pictures of you so if you dare tell anyone about my identity i will leak this to your boss.” his casual tone sent shivers down your spine. but you knew this wasn’t going to be your last time seeing him.

“by the way i’m keeping your panties.”

ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩

this lowkey kinda sucks but i wanted to post smth hope you liked it 💋💋💋

[raineandsky]

Villains are nicer, anyway

#22.2 (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

As promised, the young hero doesn’t get drowned in a dirty toilet. He doesn’t get drowned at all, in fact, and spends a lot of time being unexpectedly comfortable in the little room the villain shoved him into.

It isn’t much, really—a small bed and an even smaller cubicle for a toilet and sink. All things considered, he was expecting worse. At least it has running water.

It’s about a week—or he thinks, he stopped counting after five hours, honestly—when the villain graces him with his presence again, looking a little dishevelled and more than a little pissed off.

“Alright, well, I bumped into [Hero],” he greets as he slams the door shut, as if any encounter between heroes and villains is caused by ‘bumping into’ each other. “She’s– wow, she’s a bitch.”

The hero opens his mouth to reply, but he doesn’t manage to get a word in. “Oh right, you’re, like, ten, I shouldn’t swear around you.”

“I’m sixteen,” he reminds the villain flatly. “I’m old enough to say bitch.”

The villain gasps as if he just watched him commit a heinous crime. “Like hell you are! Anyway, you’re getting me off track here.” He clears his throat with a dismissive wave of his hand, leaning back against the metallic door. “Yes, [Hero] is… not nice. I tried to get a word in edgeways, but she was more interested in punching me in the face than talking.”

The hero worries his lip, a question sitting on his tongue anxiously. “What did you, uh…”

“Oh, I was asking about you,” the villain finishes as if he read his mind, “and look. I don’t want to be a downer, but she wasn’t, ah, how do I say this…” He heaves a deep breath, as if he’s thinking carefully about his words. “Well, she didn’t particularly care. She’s not too worried about where you are or what you’re doing. You don’t know enough valuable information to put the agency on the line, so she’s just kind of… indifferent.”

The teen already knew this, deep down. The hero never particularly cared about him when he was there, why would now be any different? She seemed intent on getting rid of him, if anything. He’d always had a glimmer of hope though, that maybe, maybe, someone was looking out for him—but it turns out that his mentor, the one who was meant to be helping him, his entire world, was just genuinely distasteful to his presence, even when he wasn’t there to offer it.

The news isn’t new, but hearing it outright…

The young hero tilts his head down to hide the impending tears, but that doesn’t dampen the heartbroken sniffle that escapes him. He wipes quickly at his eyes, annoyed with himself for showing weakness the moment something goes wrong, but the ones he wipes away are immediately replaced with more. He sits like that for a moment, snivelling and rubbing his eyes with increasing frustration, until he notices a shadow slowly lurking over him. 

“Okay, well, no need to cry. Not like we didn’t know.” the villain snaps, but not without an uncharacteristic lilt of worry. “She’s not exactly nice to me either.”

It takes the hero a moment to notice the white tissue in the villain’s hand, held out towards him, and he takes it a little hesitantly. “Yeah, but she was meant to be on my side.”

The villain hums a sigh, and the mattress sinks slightly as he settles next to the hero. “I think she might just be on her own side.”

The hero snorts, the humour interlaced with dismay, and he carefully dabs his eyes with the tissue. The pair fall into silence—not comfortable, but not entirely awkward either. After a moment the hero feels a gentle hand against his back, almost soothing but janky with inexperience.

“I didn’t mean to upset you,” the villain continues with surprising sincerity. “I would prefer to stay on your good side so you actually give me the supposedly useless information you promised.”

The teen huffs a laugh, but it sounds a little too sad. “You telling me what I already knew is nothing compared to being locked in the rain for two hours.”

The silence following is tense. He can imagine the face the villain is pulling. “You stayed there longer than most would in such conditions.”

“I stayed ‘cause I didn’t think I had any other options.” He shrugs nonchalantly, but the villain’s hand moves, his grip oddly strong on his arm.

“No, you stayed because you thought it was the best option. You knew we were here,” he says with fervour. “You showed perseverance in the face of animosity because you thought you had to to be good, but not anymore. You’re here now.”

The villain gets to his feet, and there’s a cold spot on the hero’s arm as he pulls away from him. “Villains could use someone like you. Not many have that kind of strength.” He paces slightly, the movement clumsy in the frankly too small space. “You want in on our side, right?”

The hero nods a little too fast. “I wanted it long before I ever got here.”

The villain turns back to him, his eyes glittering with barely contained excitement. “Do you really want to get your own back on her?”

Taglist: @skys-fantasy

He’s dreamed of making his so-called mentor face the sins she’s committed against him in the name of comedy. “More than anything.”

(Part 3)

[10piecechickenmcnugget]

full quotes under the cut!

“Fuck this family reunion. What do you think you're doing? You're just sitting here, happy, after everything you've done?”

"I'm done with this guy, I'm fucking done. All he does is manipulate. He lies. He destroyed my UFO. He thought I'd work for him. You think everyone's just gonna listen - "

"I've not yet forgotten Quackity's heinous crimes against my heritage. The UFO explosion is a crime which I will not, and cannot forgive. I've been trying to get closer to everyone in order to appear friendly. However, Slime appears to be Quackity's new puppet. Disappointing. I notice the weekly pattern. This puts a dent in my plan to seize power through friendly diplomacy. I have to change my strategy. I'll have to strategize through Slime and try to squeeze him out of any valuable information. And when the time seems right, I'll do whatever I have to do."

"I really wouldn't thought I would have said this, but maybe you are right. Maybe we are on the same page. Because, sure, as much as wealth, money, diamonds, that's great! But I do agree... that I think it would better for both of us if we went down in history."

"-And I really-I really wanna elaborate that I don't think there'll ever be a point in time, where I respect you as a person."

"Everyone knows about the- the Purpled house! I mean... every... y'know... you look around... and like "Oh yeah! The Purpled's house, couldn't imagine the server without Purpled's house!" Everyone remembers it! No one would notice if it was blown to smithereens... Hm... blown to smithereens."

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't just kill you right now."

"Bad, to be frank with you, Quackity just had the better price."

"I am Switzerland. Keep that in mind, guys, I am Switzerland, it is true. I don't fight unless I have to. But when I do fight, I will win."

honorable mentions: “I’ve never heard you say a single truth” and “fuck”

[imtooscaredforthis]

So Two Murderers Walk Into A Room…

Chapter Five: Elephant in The Room

Mentions of: Discussions of Murder, Weapons, Homicidal Tendencies, Slight Flirting, etc.

A/N: Here’s another chapter!! Hope you enjoy!!

Tags: @dead-bxxxtch-walking @vandeaad @moonshineinasippycup @stwbwwychan @mama-miya

It took a solid twenty minutes for you to get out of bed after you woke up. But who could blame you? You were so comfortable and were still processing everything that just happened.

Once you did, you went out to your bakery, noticing it was still dark outside. There must’ve been no change of time here. You ran your hands over the counter, wondering what to do now.

You went through the register, and the drawers underneath, finding a familiar key. Crouching down, you pulled out the box with the lock to the key, opening it up.

Inside was your book of recipes. You knew most by heart now, and kept it for the memories. Most of the recipes were from baking shows you watched, and a few were original concepts you came up with.

You flipped through the pages, before looking at the different sketches of cake designs, smiling to yourself. If you had this book in perfect condition, you wondered what else-

“Hey there.” An all too familiar voice called, startling you once again and making you jump. “Christ, can you stop that?”

“Why? It never gets old. Seeing how startled you get is adorable.” He teased, making you roll your eyes.

“What do you want? How did you even find me?” You asked. “It wasn’t that hard, especially considering it’s a new realm. You stick out like a sore thumb. And your place is a bakery shop? How cute. Murderer and Baker? You’re quite the package, toots.”

“That’s just the tip of the iceberg.” You remarked with a cocky grin. “So, have you had any trials since we last spoke? Any interesting murders you want to talk about?”

“No…I still don’t get how you can do that.”

“Do what?” He tilted his head slightly in curiosity.

“Be so casual when you’re talking about…it. Like you’re not committing one of the most heinous crimes known to man.” You replied.

“Oh, you mean Murder? It’s not like there’s any Entity police that are coming to get us. We can talk about whatever we want. Most humans are selfish, disgusting creatures, who are willing to kill when pushed far enough. And I don’t kill, I design.” He corrected.

“Is that so?” You crossed your eyes, cocking an eyebrow, unable to stop the amused look from crossing your face.

“It’s a complicated process. I have to find the perfect victim and know everything about them. Make a whole story, about who they were, what they did, and how they died. It has to be perfect, and most of the time, it is. Honestly, it’s an honor to be killed by me. I gave my victims a story, ended their boring lives and made them much more interesting. I gave them a legacy, after all.”

You stared at him intently. It’s interesting to learn about another killer’s process. Most of the time, you would just see it on tv shows and documentaries. That’s how you learned when you were younger. What to do, and what would get you caught. But you’ve never learned from someone who had actually done it like you did.

“What about you?” He asked. “What’s your process?”

You grew quiet, thinking to yourself for a moment. You found yourself having a hard time looking him in the eye, picking a recipe you knew from the heart. Turning away, you grabbed a bag of flour, placing it down on the table, before you spoke again.

“I didn’t really have one at first…I was lucky I didn’t get caught the first couple of times. They were messy. Most of the time, it was someone who did something to me..someone, who hurt me or took something from me…someone who had something I wanted. I would kill them, and either frame someone else or make it out to be a suicide.” You cracked an egg, putting it in with the mix, unable to shake the feeling of Ghostface’s eyes on you.

“Would you have all the details planned out before? Would you know what weapon you would use?” A sadistic interest hung heavily in his voice, as well as something else.

“Yes. I usually preferred to use knives. There’s just something about using the blade to pierce and cut through the skin, something about seeing the blood splatter that’s so- so- “

“Satisfying?” He finished your sentence. You looked up, seeing him leaning over the counter, resting his masked chin on his fist, clearly entertained from the conversation. “Trust me I know, I use a knife for all my kills.”

He pulled a hunting knife from his belt, showing it to you. There was a slight glint from the razor-sharp edge under the bakery lights. “Tactical knife. It’s beautiful, and it does excellent work.”

You gazed at it for a lingering moment, before continuing to knead at the dough in front of you. “Do you use any other weapons besides that pretty knife of yours?”

“I used an axe once. Managed to cut three up with it. I blamed it on the crazy old guy living in the woods.” You admitted, kneading the dough into small balls.

“That’s twisted. I love it. How many people have you killed?” The question made you pause, looking up at him. “It’s rude to ask a girl her body count, you know. But, I’ll let you guess.”

He went quiet for a long while, and you could feel his stare through his mask. “Seven.”

You gasped, offended. “That’s just insulting. Seven? Seriously? What? You don’t think I can get more ‘cause I’m a girl?”

“No! I mean, I don’t know, women killers are harder to predict.” He put his hands up in mock surrender. “Well, it’s higher than that.”

“Ten.” You make an upward gesture with your finger, signaling for him to go higher. “Thirteen? Fifteen?”

He asked incredulously. You put a hand up, stopping him. “Twelve.”

He whistled to himself. “Twelve…I have to say, I am impressed.”

“You shouldn’t underestimate a murderess, it’s not a good look.” You remarked, feeling a confidence boost. It seemed like he had finally managed to get that sadistic side of you to come out of it’s shell, and he liked it.

Suddenly, you felt that strange pulling again, groaning to yourself. “I have to get to a trial, but don’t touch any of my shit. I mean it.”

“Or what, you’ll kill me?” He teased, making you glare at him. “I’m just messing with you. I know better than to mess with a killer’s stuff. Until next time, Princess.”

He needs to quit it with those stupid pet names.

[ameliora-j]

No cause I’ve always had a weird feeling about her but I wanna know why you hate Haley

cherry my love do NOT get me started i will start:

- she picked arguments with aaron bc he was… doing his job ???

- like she was literally SO MAD

- like yeah okay he’s always away from home fine

- but the man is catching serial killers????

- literally making the streets safer ?????

- for you ??? and your child ????

- lord forbid he gets a serial killer off the street

- GOD. FUCKING. FORBID.

- that he saves another woman from getting murdered ????

- ‘aaron those girls need you but i need you more!’

- more than literal VICTIMS????? of HEINOUS CRIMES?????

- haley brooks i’m on my hands and knees quite literally BEGGING you to get a grip

- PLEASE look past your self absorption and realize YOUR HUSBAND IS A GOOD MAN

- HE’S DOING GOOD THINGS ????

- and ur mad cus what????? he wasn’t home to do a 3am diaper change????

- woe is fucking me bitch PEOPLE ARE LITERALLY DYING!!!!!!!

- also this was never confirmed but it was alluded that she cheated on him/was cheating on him

- there’s a scene,, i can’t remember the exact episode,, but their house phone rings and aaron answers it

- he says ‘hello’ like twice and then the person hangs up

- immediately,, and i do so truly mean IMMEDIATELY

- haley’s cell phone rings ????

- and mr. profiler hotch has bells going off in his head. his ears perk up and he peeks over

- and it’s never said but we know

- we KNOW!!!! that she cheated

- and do not get me started on when they had to hide from foyett

- once again, i’m started:

- shorty was literally SO MAD abt going into witsec????

- like ????

- ‘aaron i need a life!’ ‘aaron our son needs a life!’

- ‘this might be what you signed up for but we didn’t’

- haley babe there’s quite literally a violent deranged serial killer after you and your son

- please. PLEASE. for ONE. SECOND.

- think abt someone other than urself

- like oh idk YOUR 4 YEAR OLD SON?????

- like you are quite literally in the path of death

- george foyett knows who you and your son are, what you both look like, and where you are

- and ur mad because *checks notes*

- ur husband is putting u guys in witsec so that u… don’t die????

- AND THEN SHE FUCKING WENT BACK TO THEIR OLD HOUSE WHEN FOYETT CALLED PRETENDING TO BE THE WITSEC OFFICER

- AND SAT WITH HIM LIKE ALL WAS FINE AND DANDY

- FULLY KNOWING THERE WAS A SERIAL KILLER AFTER THEM ????

- like i’m not victim blaming but babe ???

- you’ve been married to an FBI agent for how long now ?????

- let’s put on our thinking caps please!!!!!

in conclusion, the true villain of the criminal minds series is haley hotchner and literally not one single person in this whole entire world will ever change my mind. actually ever

[moonlight-fan2008]

Moonlight rewatch for millionth time

Episode 8 random thoughts and feelings I had while rewatching again: cause I’m bored and have nothing else to do or watch. And I love this show

Unfortunately Shepherd’s followers would be (and are) a thing in real life. Like I know why people like him get followers but still like why?

I wish we got to explore more of Audrey’s relationship with Beth in later episodes just like “oh I spoke to Audrey the other day…” I’m hoping she was able to recover and finally get the rest she needs

Audrey “I just want to feel safe” followed by Beth immediately taking her to Mick

Again so sad humans are buttholes and torment survivors of heinous crimes like geez what’s wrong with people

Mick’s face after Beth told him she always felt safe after being kidnapped

He looks like he’s about to come clean then decides against it

I know Morgan/Coraline was just testing the waters so to speak to see how Beth and Mick feel about each other but even Lola and now Audrey pick up on the budding romance between them

This is also the second episode in a row that Josh is missing from and when Audrey asks if there’s anything going on between Beth and Mick. Beth gives a cheeky little smile and an eyebrow raise then is like oh yeah Josh when asked about his toothbrush. Again making it obvious to me that the writers always knew Beth and Mick were going to be together (or maybe I just have my shipping goggles on)

I like Beth’s home decor there’s a boho/natural vibe to it.

“Wow me without my checkbook” sassy pants

“I did nothing illegal” uh I’m pretty sure putting people’s address on the internet and suggesting someone “off” then is illegal

I like how Mick uses his pretty privilege from time to time to get people to help him or do something he needs

You now that I think about it I don’t think Father Garza’s name was ever on that list that was sent to Ben Talbot, maybe since he was a priest he was not on the radar but Donnavan Shepherds name was on the list

“That’s Spanish by the way… for keep her out of my stuff”

I like how Mick hesitated to take the machete with him and doesn’t take it but that end biting him in the butt later on

What’s through the gray door Mick?

I also wish we got to see more of his house. Like we know he at least has two bathrooms upstairs as he took a shower in one and Coraline took a shower in a different one in episode 9

36 years since Mick’s last confession which makes that 1971 so he would have been a vampire at that time. I wonder what happened to make him go to confession and also have that be the last time. I’m basing that off the fact that this episode happens in 2007 same time it aired (not exact date but generally around that time)

I wonder what the other papers were in Beth’s file, some looked like filers of some sort

I like how Mick instantly knows that something is wrong just because Beth’s voice sounds off

Adios psycho it wasn’t fun.

Together by the Kin was such a good choice for this scene

I wonder how much money Mick shells out for his loft

Second kiss

[talkin-tdc]

Ranting about my favorite character XD

I love Ordon…but I need to rant about him a bit

Ordon is quite frankly one of my favorite characters, I love what he does with Rian and their cute interactions after he turns good and all that…but that’s why I wanted him to survive and why I have to fault him for all his DUMB moves!! (Also I get that the gelfling aren’t supposed to be the brightest or some suspicious, so just take this in good fun as an outsider looking in/advice I would’ve given him if I could).

I’m not going to fault him for putting Tolyn in charge because honestly that was one of his few good choices. He’s fiercely loyal to the lords and the crystal which is what he was supposed to be so while yes Tolyn sucks and he basically killed the guard, can’t blame Ordon for that one in a good conscience…

You know what I CAN blame him for though? His complete lack of awareness in the carriage scene! Like, dude, you are the head of security! The Captain of the crystal guard and you let some rando maiden who looks to be a princess (but you don’t know for sure because she could be lying) into the lord’s carriage?! And people might be thinking ‘Oh, but SkekOk insisted’ and yeah he did but would it have killed Ordon to at least try to be more vigilant? Like do a pat down or question her to validate her claims or something? Have her empty her pockets? No? Nothing before he lets a random girl on the street into the carriage of the lords of the crystal?! She could’ve had a knife, or poison, or a million other things and he doesn’t even bother to check. It didn’t even seem like he knew her or had met her before evidence by the fact that he referred to her as “girl”. Yet he lets her in without even asking her name if something bad potentially happened, just trusts that the crowd says she’s a princess.

Next up for stupid decisions is the decision to not talk to Gurjin or get any tangible proof while he was at the castle that Rian killed Mira. I mean I know most people can write this one off, but honestly this is the most heinous in my opinion. Like he doesn’t even see her body, heinous. Let me say that again for the people in the back ahem HE DIDN’T EVEN KNOW FOR A FACT THAT SHE WAS DEAD!! You couldn’t even be bothered to ask about the body? Like ‘hey can I see her stab wounds to know if a gelfling really killed her?’ Not even that?!?! She could’ve been kidnapped for all he knew! She could’ve still been alive marking Rian innocent, but nooo we can’t have common sense can we? And not even trying to talk to Gurjin? Come on! He’d be far more likely to admit to you than anyone if your son really did commit a crime. He didn’t even check to see if Gurjin had the sickness that Rian had. He surely needed to prepare himself for the journey to find Rian, he couldn’t have swung by just to try to investigate? Couldn’t have asked Tolyn to investigate and make sure Gurjin was actually sick or showed any signs of sickness before you left?! It’s like he wants to believe Rian’s a murderer and was sick to protect his own reputation, that is not the thing to be worried about in that scenario!

Finally we come to his stupidest decision yet, going with Rian to Ha’rar. While yes there were a lot of emotions after the dreamfast and obviously that clouded everyone’s judgment, it made absolutely zero sense to go there together. Why not hmmm I don’t know have the all maudra’s daughter go with him instead of the gelfling who is said father of the accused murderer? Like Tavra could get an audience with Mayrin way faster than Ordon could. Plus she’s a third party without Ordon’s bias. I’m also sure it’d be just a little bit easier to get Gurjin out of the cells or try to save the guard or figure out more information on the Skeksis if he went instead of Tavra. Plus while running in the forest, Ordon stated he had knowledge of more of the Skeksis wrong doings, so it also could’ve made more sense if he had spoken to Maudra Fara about their info and convince her earlier that something was up.

Anyway yeah, rant over. I love him as a character but his choices could’ve been better for survival. I really wish he could’ve survived for season two if that had ended up happening but it is what it is. Let me know your thoughts on him as a character!

[studiomkm]

Buck Barnaby final prototype opening

Finally got a flow and a feeling I'm happy with. Now BEHOLD!!! My opening chapter, the heinous crime...

A gentle autumn breeze blew leaves down the sidewalk and shook the lighter Halloween decorations that still held their places in the yards of the neighborhood Ethel Freeman took her weekend morning walk. A two-piece jogging outfit kept the 62 year old woman’s body warm despite the sense of melancholy that cooled her heart. It was November 1st and thus all the wonderful decorations that had given her street such vibrant life for nearly a month would soon have to come down.

“Good morning, Miss Freeman!”

Ethel stopped at the end of her driveway and politely greeted her neighbor, the young werewolf Roan.

“I hope my pack’s Halloween party last night didn’t keep you up. I try to keep them from getting to crazy but you know how it is with us wolves…” he said with a slight sniffle.

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. I stayed up late grading papers once the trick-or-treaters stopped coming anyway so I could enjoy my weekend. I have to ask though, are you coming down with a cold?”

“Oh no,” he assured her as he wiped his nose with a napkin from his back pocket, “Somebody just pranked our party by tossing this weird wolfsbane potpourri bomb into the living room through the back door. We had it wide open so anyone could come and go for fresh air as they please. But yeah, combine sneezing werewolves with drunk werewolves and you’ve got a recipe for sleeping in well past noon the day after.”

“Well I assume that you being up and talking to me this morning means you were a little more responsible than your guests,” Ethel replied with a small bit of admonishment in her tone.

“Oh yeah. Pack rules: I hosted the party so I had to stay sober in case somebody needs a designated driver, which three people did,” he explained.

“I thought you didn’t have a license?”

“I don’t, but-” he said as he shifted from fully human to partially wolfish with a mischievous smirk, “-I’ve got a strong back, fast legs and a killer jump.”

Ethel smiled and rolled her eyes then walked to her front door to unlock it.

“How’s Evan by the way?” Roan asked as Ethel fiddled with her house keys.

“He’s fine… had a lot of fun last night floating our decorations around with his powers. I bet he’ll be tuckered out for the rest of today though. I’ll be surprised if he lifts up anything heavier than the TV remote today.”

“I didn’t know ghosts could get tired.”

“Maybe not all ghosts, but definitely little Evan.” She replied as she finally got her door unlocked, “Well you take care now, Roan, and maybe put on some tea to help with your stuffy noses.”

Roan chuckled and smiled warmly.

“Will do, Miss Freeman. Hope you and Evan have a relaxing day,” he said before bounding back to his house, still half-shifted.

Ethel entered her home, unable to bother with her still open front door just yet as she went to hang the jacket of her jogging suit up. The door closed behind her right as she got her jacket on the coat rack in the hallway and a smile lit up her face.

“Thank you, Evan. You didn’t have to do that. I know you’re still recovering from last night,” she called out cheerfully as she made her way to the kitchen.

Evan floated down through the ceiling, his ghostly glow painting the walls around him with a sky blue light, and pointed towards the door as he followed Ethel into the kitchen by her side.

“Yes, I know. It was very nice of you,” she said while smiling at the spectral child.

On the kitchen table was some mail from the previous day that she hadn’t yet bothered to open. Ethel grabbed it on her way to the coffee maker and pulled out one of the pods from the cabinet above, along with her second favorite mug. The machine hummed into action and the smell of French roast filled the air within moments as the woman of the house flipped through what she had received.

Most of it was the usual, predictable spam but one envelope in the middle of the pile put an immediate frown on her face. The unnatural smile of the local big shot real estate man, Darryl Bell, stared up at her from the envelope’s face and she didn’t need to open it to know its contents. She tore the envelope up with moderate prejudice then tossed its remains in her trash right as her cup of coffee finished brewing.

“First he won’t make that boy stop calling and now he invades my mailbox. I’m about ready to march right on up to that office of his and tear him a new one so hard I’ll be able to hear Mama gasp from Heaven,” Ethel growled.

Evan silently chuckled at her display of indignity. The act had finally stopped his pointing at the door and Ethel shook her head, smiling as she took her first sip of coffee. The perfectly bitter brew caused a pleased hum to escape her lips.

“Nothing hits you quite like that first little bit of coffee, Evan,” she said to her ghostly companion as she took a seat at the table.

Evan floated down and mimicked sitting down next to her, though it wasn’t actually possible for him to touch the seat.

“Can you believe that in just two measly little weeks, it’ll be twenty-five years to the day since I started sharing this house with you?”

Evan smiled and shook his head no.

“Well I certainly can. I get a little more tired and a little more sore every morning. I’m finally starting to understand why Mama was always so grumpy when she was my age.”

A loud crash from the hallway interrupted their pleasant morning conversation so suddenly that Ethel jumped in her seat while swearing. The startling noise had also caused her to spill her coffee, which elicited a second swear. Ethel moved quickly to grab some paper towels to clean the mess with while Evan floated towards where the sound had come from.

“This had better not be an omen for the rest of my day, I swear to God…” Ethel grumbled.

Once the coffee had been cleaned up and the paper towels tossed in the trash, Ethel made her way back to the hallway. A vase, along with the water and lilies it once held, lay shattered on the floor.

“Oh come on, I just bought this… and it was in the middle of the table!” she whined.

Evan cocked his head and floated through the floor until his eyes were level with the shattered pieces. The position made him look like a glowing toupee with eyes but Ethel was too upset to find it amusing.

“Evan, did you do this?”

The ghostly youngster shook his head no.

“Then how did it break? I was nowhere near it and we didn’t just have a little earthquake, so how did it fall off the middle of the table in our hallway?” she demanded as she crossed her arms, “Accidents are accidents but don’t you dare lie to me, young man.”

Evan rose out of the floor with fury on his face. The temperature around them dropped so sharply that the water spilled onto the floor froze as the ghost boy violently shook his head no. Ethel leveled the same glare she gave her students when she was trying to catch them in lies but Evan continued to silently deny any guilt. After a few more moments of intense staring, offset slightly by Ethel’s equally intense shivering, Evan disappeared entirely from view.

Despite Evan’s absence, the cold he had created remained and so had the ice. Ethel let out a large breath along with an angry moan then turned around. She would have to get something from the kitchen to help break up the ice before she could clean it, along with more paper towels to clean up any wet spots that might remain.

“That boy’s getting an earful once I’ve calmed down…” Ethel grumbled to herself as she stomped back towards the kitchen.

She only managed four steps before another loud crash from the hallway caused her to stop dead in her tracks. It was the unmistakable sound of glass breaking and the only glass in the entry hallway were photos of her family. A terrible fear overtook her features as she bolted back to the hallway as quickly as she could, followed by a terrible sadness as her worst fear was confirmed.

The broken picture was the last one she had taken with her mother while the woman was still healthy enough to exist outside of hospice.

“No no no no no….” she softly chanted as she bent over to pick up the precious memory.

There wasn’t even enough time to wipe all the tiny shards of glass off the photo before a third crack filled the room, this time accompanying a terrible pain in Ethel’s head. The poor woman instinctually grabbed at her head, the photo still gripped tightly in her fingers. It took several seconds for her to register that she’d just been hit in the back of the head and as she stumbled groggily backwards, she spied her coat rack move all on its own.

It smashed into her legs like a baseball bat and sent her to the ground. Her head suffered more damage as she collided with the hard tile underneath her and Ethel’s vision filled with stars. She was blinded but felt the full weight of her coat rack as it slammed down on top of her prone body. She cried out in agony and irrationally curled herself around the photograph she had somehow managed to keep hold of. More blows rained down upon her and in her state of terror and pain Ethel could only think of one thing. She gathered what air was still left in her lungs and cried out as loudly as she could.

“EVAN!!!!”

[cas-kingdom]

“For the first time in my life, I genuinely want to throw my lute in the ocean” (me hinting at the witcher lmao I’m sorry I just miss akela)

Find the OC version of this fic here.

"For the first time in my life, I genuinely want to throw my lute in the ocean.”

Geralt hummed as he tossed the fish net in the water. “Do our future selves a favour and don’t pass yourself up on that.”

“I mean, do you hear that noise?” Jaskier whispered harshly so you couldn’t hear, as though that was at all possible with the caterwauling sound you were pulling from his lute behind them. “My beautiful, beautiful instrument sounds like a shrieking cat.” He turned when a particularly grinding twang sounded, his mouth dropping open as you seemed to ponder over what went wrong before evidently giving up and returning to your...music.

“Gods,” Jaskier said more to himself than anyone, “that girl is tone deaf.”

You, who had been sat cross-legged on the ground for the past half hour, strummed some deplorable tune on Jaskier’s lute that you seemed to think was ethereal. It was, in fact, anything other than that. Jaskier had never heard such an ear-splitting sound, and it pained him to see this heinous crime undertaken on his most beloved possession.

“Don’t I sound good, Jaskier?” you called, pausing your strumming for a second to shoot him a wide grin. “I could be a bard, too! We can travel together!”

Jaskier was remarkably lost for words for a mere ten seconds. He sucked in a deep breath before forcing the biggest smile he could, tossing his hands up in the air for emphasis. “That’s an absolutely—brilliant idea, Y/N!”

He could see the excited twinkle in your eye even from where he was standing, and he felt his inner walls crumble at the sight of it. He loved you to absolute pieces, but in this moment, as you returned to your playing, the notes emanating from his lute not even accounting to music, he was very pleased to return to his earlier statement. 

“Ocean,” he said as he returned to Geralt. “Now.”

Geralt chuckled under his breath, drawing in the fish net as he shook his head. “You really don’t know?”

“Know what—oh, look what she’s doing! Y/N, Y/N—don’t press hard on the strings, they’re delicate.”

Geralt put his hands on his hips, glancing between his sneaky child and the oblivious bard. “She’s doing it on purpose, Jaskier.”

Jaskier paused. “Sorry?”

“She knows she’s shit. She also knows how to press all the right buttons on you. I would get the infuriating thing back now before she snaps the strings.”

The silence that ensued after that revelation was a blessing, though it didn’t last long.

Witcher Masterpost

send me the first sentence of a fanfic and i’ll write the next five, except i don’t know when to stop writing so i guarantee there’ll be more than five

[sanctum-of-ramshackle]

What would happen if all of the SCP escaped from the foundation and go to Twisted Wonderland? I could sense chaos

SCP!MC/Yuu: Hello, I’m Dr. MC/Yuu, the head researcher of the SCP-TWST-2020 case and I’ll be answering this question. As you know, the SCP Foundation has specialized containments for each and every SCP as well as areas of the US or in other parts of the world are highly monitored for anomalies that are classified as Keter and Euclid.

For example, SCP-1098-RU is located in Russia and it’s an old mansion with fencing surrounding the area that’s now heavily guarded and being monitored by the Russian branch of the foundation. (If you’re curious about that anomaly, then brace yourself since it will give you nightmares.) If any unauthorized people were to attempt breaking inside that “haunted house” are taken in by the foundation and use amnestics as we don’t want to draw more attention.

So what I can say is if all anomalies were somehow able to escape from their chambers and enter to the magical world called Twisted Wonderland, then Hell will break loose. Any laws of physics don’t really apply to some anomalies like SCP-145, which may cause more trouble for unfortunate souls and tech geeks like Shroud. I advised everyone to not interact with any of them unless my presence is nearby.

So yeah, there will be chaos if Keter/Euclid classified SCPs were to enter into the other world.

[SCP-TWST-2020 Chamber]

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Filling out some reports*

Grim: *Testing on a mind teaser exercise game by them*

[The coffin opens but someone is trying to sneak back inside.]

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Not looking back* Put that anomaly down before I’ll shoot you in your kneecaps.

Ace & Epel: *Freezes and carefully placed a mirror down*

SCP!MC/Yuu: Ace, Epel, what are you doing now?

Ace: Uhh…

Epel: We needed a mirror.

SCP!MC/Yuu: A mirror? That’s it?

Epel: Well…I accidentally broke the one on Vil-Senpai’s vanity and as punishment, I need to find a temporary mirror while a new set arrives.

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Rolls their eyes* You could’ve asked me to buy one. I’m your head researcher, remember?

Epel: Sorry, MC/Yuu…

SCP!MC/Yuu: It’s okay. Just tell me anything next time. Now head back to your dorms. You don’t want to keep your dorm leaders waiting.

[The Next Time]

[Dr. MC/Yuu’s Laboratory]

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Dissecting a newborn of SCP-7999*

Vil: *Barges into Dr. MC/Yuu’s lab with fury* Dr. MC/Yuu.

SCP!MC/Yuu: Hm? *Pulls off their safety goggles and mask* Vil? Why did you barged in here? I’m working on a possible fungal infection or a hazardous species.

Vil: Oh. *Leaves the lab* I need a shower and sanitation.

[Half hour later]

Vil: *Waits outside*

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Exits the lab with clean clothes on* Okay, what were you about to ask me?

Vil: Where in Great Seven did Epel get that cursed mirror?

SCP!MC/Yuu: Cursed mirror? What are you talking about?

Vil: That mirror showed me a scene of a heinous crime when I was applying make-up for today.

SCP!MC/Yuu: *Worry grew on their face* Oh no.

Vil: What? Don’t tell me it’s an anomaly of yours.

SCP!MC/Yuu: It sounds like SCP-987. Now…The Curator is after the boys.

Vil: *Gasps* Oh wait. Who is that?

SCP!MC/Yuu: Let’s just say an invisible entity who watches over its precious mirrors and gets extremely furious if one of them breaks from an unwanted assailant.

Vil: Did you say “mirrors”?

SCP!MC/Yuu: Yeah, there’s more than one and the collection is still continuing. Come on, let’s get that dreadful mirror before anyone else sees it. I’ll call for back-up.

[Pomefiore Dormitory]

[SCP Field Agents surround the whole building and everyone evacuated from their rooms.]

SCP!MC/Yuu: *On a radio with a lieutenant* *BZZT!* This is Dr. MC/Yuu. Any updates on the anomaly? *BZZT!*

Lieutenant: *BZZT!* Negative. The anomaly is still by the vanity. *BZZT!*

SCP!MC/Yuu: *BZZT!* Is everyone in the Pomefiore dorm evacuated? *BZZT!*

Lieutenant: *BZZT!* All clear. *BZZT!*

Epel: Is it necessary to call every agent? It’s just a mirror.

SCP!MC/Yuu: Is it necessary to prevent an anomalous being from breaking your necks? It’s just another anomaly.

Epel: …

SCP!MC/Yuu: That’s what I thought.

[Hours later, the mirror was contained and agents escorted Dr. MC/Yuu plus the object back to the SCP Foundation.]

SCP!MC/Yuu: Oh yeah. Epel, Ace, you both owe me a bunch of apologies and you’re buying me lunch back at the Lounge.

Epel: We only borrowed a mirror!

SCP!MC/Yuu: Yeah, with a lingering entity attached to the mirrors! You’re so grounded!

Ace: Not again.

SCP!MC/Yuu: Only for a week.

Ace: …Okay, I can handle it.

[nemeseos-noctua]

God I love your work so much?? You guys are amazing .

Can I request how Albedo, Xiao and Diluc react to their s/o pushing them away in attempt to keep them safe from danger? (Eg they may be the traveller who is connected with the fatui and the abyss aand therefore fears for their s/o's safety.

Tysm!! I love your guys' writing style. requesting this specifically bc it's not fair Xiao gets to be to edgy one all the time in the fics🙄 how does it feel to get pushes away now loverboy? (/j!! I love him just thought this prompt would be a neat inversion).

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: albedo, xiao, diluc (separate) x gn!reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: not proofread, blood, mentions albedos story (spoilers), xiao story spoilers, reader is not traveler

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: hehe tysm!! ALSO 100% haha i LOVEEE xiao but yk he be a lil stingy when it comes to safety! i want to tuck him in and tell him it’ll be alright 😔😔

during your travels across teyvat, you have encountered far more fatui and abyss mages than you’d care to count

and some of which— had some, err, not so kind grudges against you

these grudges were so serious that you began to worry for albedo’s safety. you personally did not care for blood staining your hands nor soul—but if that blood was albedo’s... oh boy

so, coming to a conclusion... you decided on the inevitable: keep albedo at arm’s length—for your heart and his

and, it worked. for a month, it worked. your visits to his camp in dragonspine lessened, your chaste kisses and morning voice left his life like... regrettably, his master

Staring up at the whirling winds of Dragonspine, Albedo’s teal eyes trailed over the ice, wishing to see a familiar silhouette among its blizzard.

He had been counting. It has been five days, two minutes, and 54 seconds since you last visited him—

Hah, just kidding. He didn’t count—but it has been five days.

Where were you? Maybe you were busy—the alchemist knew you had a life outside of—well, him. 

It was unfair of him to be impatient, for you had been nothing short of patient towards him. But still, his heart longs and yearns for your touches, his head feels cold without your fingers twisting through his silky blonde hair. 

Dragonspine was cold, but without you, it was colder.

he’d eventually head back down to mondstadt, solely for the purpose of finding you

his mind got the best of him as he spiraled into a brief insanity. maybe he did something to make you mad? maybe you were injured, recovering without his aid? so many questions spinning around his head he almost missed the sight of your [e/c] eyes

“[Y/N]—“ Albedo’s voice cut through the crowds of Mondstadt as the alchemist rushed forward. Adrenaline pumped through his veins, desperation taking over him as he reached a hand out for you.

“Albedo...?” You stopped in your tracks, taking in the sight of your boyfriend’s unruly hair and tired eyes. His lips were still purple—as if he had come back down from Dragonspine recently.

“Where were you?” The alchemist asked, his gloved hand wrapped around your wrist delicately, his eyes scanning all over you as to check whether you were injured or not.

“Ah... I was—adventuring,” You sweatdropped, the coldness of his gloves stinging your wrist, your eyes wide at how cold he was.

he doesn’t believe you—hah. of course he doesn’t, albedo is a genius in fields he wishes to study

he knows you too well to fall for your mindless responses or excuses, he knows your eyes too well to succumb to the smile on your lips or kindness in your touch

he knows, he knows he knows he knows—so why? what are you hiding? why are you hiding? from him of all people?

everyone has secrets—albedo is aware, for he has his own share. but please, can’t you spare his heart? just this once?

“Tell me the truth, [Y/N],” Albedo asked—no, begged. He wanted to know what kept you so far from his reach, what stopped you from visiting him or loving him or just being with him. Was he the problem? Was this the end of your love?

“I...” You looked away, tugging the alchemist against the current of the crowds, seeking an area for just the two of you.

And once you found it, you pulled the blonde into a hug. The coldness of his coat didn’t faze you, nor did the way his eyes widened or the way his arms hesitantly wrapped back around you.

“I don’t want someone like you to get involved with me, Albedo. You’re...” You looked away, your face still buried into the alchemist’s shoulder. 

“... A weakness. You’re a weakness that’ll be used against me.”

albedo is in utter disbelief

he—you—what?!

he’s... your weakness?

albedo doesn’t know whether to be flattered or hurt. he knows you have a dangerous job, he knows about the amount of letters you receive threatening him or you, he knows what you’re doing is for the better...

but—he cannot allow it. he wants to hold you without regrets, he wants to kiss you and eat lunch with you at good hunter...

“[Y/N],” Albedo breathed, cupping your cheeks in the palm of his hands as he stared violently into your eyes. Gaze softening, he couldn’t bring it in himself to scold you for all the worries you brought him to.

“I promise you—that even if Fatui and Abyss Mages disrupt my alchemy, I promise that I want to get involved with you—I, I want to be with you.”

His heart, it wants so much, it wants to have you, it wants to love you.

So please—won’t you let him do that? 

xiao also has many people out for his throat

well, i suppose... the difference between those ‘people’ and your ‘people’ is the fact that xiao’s debts are owed to the dead

the whispers, the screams, the agony. it plagues every part of his mind, like a melody with no beat, like an endless tune that he will hear for the rest of time

and you—you’re like, the charm. the ward and sigil that scares away all of those demons. you’re the sunshine that seeps through the cracks of caves

and now... you’re drifting. like a ship at sea, he wonders... will you be back?

regrettably—you think—maybe, maybe... you won’t return

What is this? The third week Xiao has sat atop the roof of Wangshu Inn? Hoping mindlessly to hear your steps up the staircase?

Hah. Is this who he has become? An adeptus who waits for a mortal like you to come, an adeptus who should be defending Liyue, and yet, here he is.

he’s a bit... put off

like. who are you to make him feel this way, mortal? (derogatory) 

he doesn’t want to admit it... but... he misses you. there! he said it. he misses you. now can you come back, please?

he knows, he knows he is not the best lover... that he is blunt, enigmatic, and sometimes... rude. but— but you, you accept him for that

and he ponders atop the roof of wangshu inn—perhaps, was this ignoring scheme long overdue? have you finally grown tired of him and all of his karma? have you found someone better—someone you can love you, hold you, and care for you like you deserve?

he hopes—the answer is no

but he knows... the answer is probably yes

“Oh, [Y/N]! You’re back!” Verr Goldet’s hushed voice ran through the adeptus mind as his form shot up almost instantly. Staring down from his position on the roof, his yellow eyes stared over at your familiar form, your [e/c] eyes and vision that dangled from your hip.

“Haha, sorry about that.” 

You smiled, but Xiao didn’t miss the way you winced upon doing so. Your arms and legs were wrapped with bandages, dried splotches of red and clothing as messy as could be.

“Your room is upstairs, sleep well,” Verr Goldet nodded knowingly, a bittersweet grin on her face as her mind flickered to the thought of Xiao and his shortening temper.

once you step out onto the balcony, you do not need to look to see who has appeared beside you

“Hello, Xiao!” You say openly, arms outstretched for a hug as the adeptus merely stared at you. Three weeks. Three weeks without you, three weeks too many—and here you were, opening your arms like you had just returned back from an hour long trip.

“ . . . “ Staying silent, Xiao could only cross his arms, glaring at you with mixed emotions. He was relieved to see you back and ‘happy’, but still, he was frustrated and irritated at the way you behaved so recklessly.

“You owe me an expla—“

“—nation,” You finished for the male, an exasperated smile gracing your features as you turned over to the balcony, the setting moon and proud stars soaring like the birds of Mondstadt.

“I was... dealing with some encounters,” Your tone was laced with a malice even he wasn’t expecting, the number of bandages scouring your skin finally making sense as his eyes narrowed into slits.

“Fatui? Tell me where they are, I wi—“

“No.”

Turning over to him fully, Xiao’s breath hitched. Ugh, again—you and your pretty smile and charming features. The simplest things you do made him go insane like the karmic debts that flourished through his mind.

“You can’t get involved, Xiao. They will only go after you. I returned here today to tell you that I’ll be going off for three month—“

“What?” The Yaksha breathed in disbelief. Did he hear right? Were you seriously leaving again?! 

“I said, I am leaving again... Xiao. It’s not you—Celestia no... it’d never be you. It’s just...” You looked around, to anywhere, anyone but him. If you glanced at him now, chances are you’d succumb to his sunny eyes and stay back at Wangshu Inn. 

“... The Fatui. I got on their wanted list and—I don’t want them to use you against me. So I’ll go out and get rid of them, and I’ll be ba—“

“No.”

It was his turn to decline, for he didn’t want to hear anything you had to say. You got on the Fatui’s wanted list?! What?! He...

He was going to kill them. 

“Do you think I am weak, [Y/N]? Eons of slaughter and—“ 

“Xiao!” You facepalmed, raising your voice slightly at the male as he blinked, taken aback that you, a mortal would ever thing of committing such a heinous crime towards a divine being like him.

“You’re not weak! It’s just... I’m weak. And if they find you, they could just threaten me with everything they’d do to you! Even if nothing happened at all...” Your voice died down, your heart hammering against your chest as Xiao’s eyes softened.

Xiao was—speechless. He didn’t know what to say, what to do. Nobody had ever thought of him so kindly before, neither have they ever treated him as something other than a weapon of war.

So, he vowed. Like the night Rex Lapis found him all those millennia ago, like the night he broke free from the chains of manipulation—he vowed, time and time again—

“I will protect you, [Y/N]. For there is no need to protect me.”

[internal screaming]

diluc, of all people, no longer is afraid of ‘grudges’ or ‘debts’ owed to the fatui or abyss order. he dances with evil, masquerading each night for his life

and now, the only light in his world full of darkness, the only fire in the cold icy winds...

left

you left. you left with a little note saying you’d be back in what—five months?

a part of him was... shocked. it was surprised at how abrupt it was. one moment, the two of you were laying in bed, cradling each others’ forms. and the next? you were gone

the other part of him was... worried. did you want to leave him? what was this about? did you owe debt to the fatui? you could’ve told him, he would’ve payed for it all in a heartbeat

but diluc of mondstadt—hah, he was not known for stepping down so easily. so until he figures out why you left so suddenly, he is not stopping his search for the truth

and once he so happens to run into lumine and asks the traveler where you’ve been—he’s shocked

at first, he thinks lumine must me mistaken. what? what do you mean “[y/n] is heading out to fight the abyss herald”, you’re kidding... haha...

(lumine swore she saw her life flash before her eyes when diluc wrapped his head around the news)

diluc feels a bit... guilty. he feels guilty that he didn’t know sooner, he feels guilty that the abyss order is bothering you like how it bothers him, he feels guilty for everything

Wiping some blood that spilled from the corner of your mouth, you grimaced at the metallic taste. 

What was it? Err... day five? This was the first Abyss Herald you have encountered so far, and you could only assume it was the first of many.

Standing up, you sheathed your weapon. Your vision glowed brightly in the darkness of the ruins, the moon illuminating the way out as you sighed, pulling yourself across the stone cold floor.

As you trudged outside and into the moonlight, a twig cracked under a foot that wasn’t yours, prompting you to reach out and materialize your weapon, charging it with power from your vision.

“Who?”

Stepping out from the trees, your eyes widened at a sight you hadn’t expected to see—at least, expected to see this soon.

“Diluc?” You breathed, heaving a sigh of relief as the male took no notice to your words, instead, his vermilion eyes traced over your battered form, his eyes worrying even more with each glance he spared.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked, rushing up to you as he pulled out some bandages, wrapping them around your wounds so he could get you back to the winery.

pushing yourself away from his grasp, diluc watched in hurt as you kept him away from your figure

“i couldn’t—i didn’t want you to get involved,” you mumbled guiltily, looking away from the male as his eyes seemed to berate you silently

“me involved? what do you mean?” diluc asks in disbelief. he of all people should be the one telling you that

“the abyss. i got in a tumble with them and now they’re after my blood,” you murmured, only causing diluc’s heart to pound even louder in his chest, his brain flickering to unpleasant memories as he rushed up to you, securely placing his hands on your shoulders

He’s... speechless. He doesn’t know what to say, what to do. He’s usually the one keeping people at arms-length—yet here you were, stealing his lines and his worries.

“I...” Diluc paused, trying to form words, and yet, nothing came to mind.

“...”

Silence. It filled the ambience and your hearts, yet, it was not the same silence in the abyss, nor was it the same silence before a nightmare.

It was a silence of awe, a silence that you’d hear before a firework would shoot up in the sky—it was calming, a relaxing wave like a seashell pressed against your ear.

A silent love—like the one you and Diluc shared. An unsung melody that played in the beat of your hearts, the breaths of the wind...

A silent promise, like a marriage or a confession, a promise to—

“I will be by your side, [Y/N]. No matter what.”

Through thick and thin, cold and warm, there is nothing but you two, two lovers against the darkness, dancing with ghosts and evil.

— constellations! 💫

[scorpionyx9621]

Do you think Jason Todd fandom is kinda toxic? Because it seems like NO MATTER what DC do, there'll always be complains. Forget the bad adaptation like Titans. Even Judd Winick cannot escape the criticism with how he potrayed Robin!Jason. They just never satisfied.

SORRY, IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO RESPOND TO THIS. I just moved from Washington D.C. to Seattle, which, for my non-American friends, that's 4442km away. And I DROVE THERE ALL BY MYSELF. And now I'm trying to find new work in a new city and trying to stay mentally healthy and positive. Life is exciting but hard and scary.

*sighs*

As someone who was a fandom elder with V*ltr*n. I've seen some of the worst when it comes to fandom behavior. I'm talking people baking food with shaving razors and trying to give them to the showrunners. I'm talking leaking major plot details and refusing to take it down unless they make their ship canon (I am looking at you, Kl*nce stans) For the most part, DC Comics has had a decades-long reputation of treating their fans like trash and not caring what they think so from what I've seen, we all just grumble and complain in our corners of the internet about how we don't like how X comic portrays Jason Todd.

The challenge with Jason Todd is that he's your clinical anti-hero, the batfamily's Draco in Leather Pants, he's a jerkass woobie, and on top of all of that, he's a Tumblr sexyman. It's a perfect storm for a very fun but frustrating character to be a fan of. It doesn't help that every writer decides to re-invent the wheel every time Jason comes up so his canon lore is confusing at best and inconsistent as a standard.

I guess starting with a general brief on who Jason is and what is uniform about him with every instance he's appeared in comics/media.

Grew up in a poor family in Gotham with a dad who was a petty-mid-level criminal, and a mother who dies of a drug overdose.

Survives on the street on his own by committing petty crimes and potentially even engaging in sexual acts to keep himself alive.

Is cornered by Batman and taken in after Dick Grayson quits/is fired

Becomes the second Robin, but is known for being the harsher, more brutal Robin.

Is killed by Joker after being tortured, but somehow comes back to life and regains senses through the Lazarus Pit

Resolves himself to be better than Batman by basically being Batman but kills people.

Where there has been a lot of conflict in the fandom is the fact that Jason Todd is not a character that is written consistently. DC Comics loves to go with the narrative that Jason was "bad from the start" and was the "bad robin" when, yes, he has trouble controlling his anger, but he also still is just as invested in seeing the best of Gotham City and trying to be a positive change for the world as any other DC Comics hero.

Where I get frustrated with the fandom is its ability to knit-pick every detail of a comic they don't like while completely disregarding everything that makes the comics great and worth it to read. My example being Urban Legends. To which most people had pretty mixed reactions to. I was critical of the comic at first but as it went along I ended up really liking it. I have a feeling DC Comics went to Chip Zdarsky and told him he had 6 issues to bring Jason back into the Bat Family, and honestly he didn't do a bad job. Did it feel rushed? Absolutely. I wish there was more development of Jason and Bruce's characters and their dynamic as a whole. However, where I see a lot of people being angry and upset with Urban Legends is that they feel Zdarsky needlessly wrote Jason as an incompetent fool who needs Bruce to save him.

Whether or not that was the intention of Zdarsky is up to debate. However, and this may be controversial, but I don't think he wrote Jason Todd out of character at all. For as fearsome, intimidating, and awesome as Red Hood is. Jason is a character who is absolutely driven by his emotions. Why do you think he donned the role of Red Hood? As a response to his anger towards The Joker for killing him, and towards Bruce for not taking action against The Joker and for seemingly replacing him so quickly after he died. Jason didn't care about being the murderous Robin Hood or for being the bloody hammer of justice against N*zi's and P*d*ph*les. He only cared originally about making The Joker and Bruce pay. It wasn't until he trained under the best assassins in the world and realized most of them were horrific criminals who trafficked children and were p*dos that Talia began to realize that the teachers that she sent Jason to train under started dying horrific and painful deaths.

The entire story of the Cheer story in Batman Urban Legends was started because it finally forced some consequences upon Jason. Tyler, aka Blue Hood's father was a drug dealer who gave his supply to his wife and kids. And when Tyler's father admitted he gave the drugs to Tyler, it immediately made him fall within the self-imposed philosophical kill-list of Jason Todd. And Jason, well, he proceeds to kill Tyler's father. When this happens, Jason is in shock. Tyler's dad fit the bill to easily and justifiably be killed by Jason. We've never seen Jason having to deal with the consequences of being a murderous vigilante on a micro-level. When Jason realizes what he's done in that he's murdered Tyler's dad, he's shocked. He tells Babs the truth. He does a rational thing because he's in shock. He doesn't know what to do, he never has had to face the consequences of his actions as Red Hood and now the gravity of befriending a child as a vigilante hero who kills people just set in when he killed the father of the same child he was just introduced to.

(Oh here's a little aside because it had to be said, Jason would not have been a good father or a good mentor to Tyler and absolutely should not have been his new Robin. Jason is a man who is in his early 20's (not saying men in their early 20's can't be good fathers at all) who is a brutal serial killer using the guise of a vigilante anti-hero to let him escape most of the law. the complications of having the man who murdered your father adopt you and make you his sidekick are way too numerous for me to explain in a long-winded already heavy Tumblr essay post. There's a reason why we don't advocate for a story where Joe Chill adopted Bruce Wayne or one where Tony Zucco took in Dick Grayson.)

The next biggest argument is that they feel that Jason is giving up his guns as a means to just be invited back into the Bat-Family. To which I will tell anyone who has that argument to go actually read Urban Legends. Already have and still have that argument? Please re-read it. Don't want to? That's okay, I will paste the images from the comic where Jason specifically says that he doesn't want to give up his weapons for Bruce and his real reasoning down below since the comic isn't exactly readily accessible.

Jason gave up the guns because he felt the gravity of what he had done and knows how it'll effect Tyler. Thankfully his mom is alive and in recovery. But Tyler doesn't have a father anymore. And Jason killed Tyler's father. It may have been in accordance to Jason's philosophy, but it was a case where it blurred the lines. Jason Todd isn't a black and white character, just very dark gray. He doesn't kill aimlessly like the Joker. If you are on Jason's list you probably have done something pretty horrific, and also just in general, being in his way or being a threat to him. Mind you, in early days of Red Hood and the Outlaws (Image below) Jason almost killed 10 innocent civilians in a town in Colorado all because they saw him kill a monster. That being said, Jason isn't aimless in his kills.

(Also can we just take a moment to appreciate Kenneth Rocafort's art? DC Comics said we need to rehabilitate Jason Todd's image and Kenneth Rocafort said hold my beer: It's so SO GOOD)

That being said, the key emphasis in the story of Cheer asides from trying to introduce Jason Todd back into the Bat Family and give an actual purpose for him being there, other than him just kind of being there ala Bowser every time he shows up for Go Kart racing, Tennis, Golf, Soccer, and the Olympic games when Mario invites him, is that Jason and Bruce ultimately both want the same thing. Jason wants to be welcomed back into the family and to be loved and appreciated. Bruce want's Jason back as his son and wants to love and protect Jason. Both of these visions are shown in the last chapter of Cheer while under the effect of the Cheer Gas. It's ultimately this love and appreciation they both have for each other that helps them overcome their challenge and win.

Jason Todd is a character who, just like Bruce, has been through so much pain and so much hate in his life. The two are meant to parallel each other. While Bruce chose to see the best in everyone, giving every rogue in his gallery the option to be helped and give them a second chance, hence why he never kills, Jason has a similar view on wanting to protect the public, but he understands that some crimes are so heinous they cannot be forgiven, or that some habitual criminals are due to stay habitual criminals, and need to be put down. But at the end of the day, the two of them both try to protect people in their own ways.

I am aware that through the writings of various DC Comics authors such as Scott Lobdell and Judd Winick, the two have had a very tumultuous relationship. And rightfully so, I am by no means saying that Scott Lobdell writing an arc where Bruce literally beats Jason to within an inch of his life in Red Hood and the Outlaws, nor Judd Winick's interpretation of Under the Red Hood where Bruce throws the Batarang at Jason's neck, slicing his throat and leaving him ambiguously for dead at the end of the comic is appropriate considering DC Comics seems to be trying everything they can to integrate Jason back into the family. That being said, a lot of these writings have shaped the narrative of Jason and Bruce's relationship and have an integral effect on the way the fandom views the two. It doesn't help that Zdarsky acknowledged Lobdell's life-beating of Jason by Bruce at the very end of Cheer by having Bruce give Jason his old outfit back as a means of mending the fence between the two of them. That does complicate a lot of things in terms of how they are viewed by the fandom and helps to cause an even greater divide between the two.

Regardless, I want to emphasize the fact that Jason Todd is a part of the family of his own accord. Yes, he's quite snarky and deadpan in almost every encounter. However, Jason is absolutely a part of the family and has been for a while of his own will. There's a great moment in Detective Comics that emphasizes this. Jason cares about his family because it is his found family. Yes, they may be warry about him and use him as a punching back and/or heckle him. At the end of the day, we're debating the family dynamics of a fictional playboy billionaire vigilante whose kleptomania took the form of adopting troubled children and turning them into vigilante heroes. Jason Todd wants a family that will love and support him. This is a key definition of his character at its most basic. This was proven during the events of Cheer and is being reenforced by DC Comics every time they get the opportunity to do so.

Now, none of this is to say that I hate Judd Winick. I do not, I don't like the fact that in all of his writings of Jason, he just writes him as a dangerous psychopath, and Winick himself admits to seeing Jason as nothing much more than a psychopath. Yet Winick is the one who the majority of the fandom clings to as the one true good writer of Jason Todd because 'Jason was competent, dangerous, smart' Listen, friends, Jason is all of that and I will never deny it. However, what I love about Jason isn't that he's dangerously smart of that writers either write him as angsty angry Tumblr sexyman bait or that they write him as an infantile man child with a gun. There's a large contention of this fandom that has an obsession with Jason Todd being this vigilante gunman who is hot and sexy and while I definitely get the appeal. It is very creepy and downright disturbing that all of you hyperfixate on his use of guns and ability to be a murderer. It is creepy and I'm not necessarily here for it.

What I love about Jason Todd is that despite all of the pain, all of the heartache, all of the betrayal, and bullying, and death, and anguish. Jason Todd is one of the most loving and supportive characters in all of DC Comics. Jason has been through so much in his life, but he still chooses to love. He still chooses to see the bright side in people. Yes, he takes a utilitarian approach and chooses to kill certain villains, but at the end of the day he wants to see a better world, and he wants to be loved. It takes so much courage and so much heart to learn to love again after one has been abused or traumatized. I would not blame Jason at all if he said fuck it and just went full solo and vigilante evil. He has every right to, but he still chooses to be with the Bat Family of his own accord. That's something that I see a lot of in myself. I have been through a lot of trauma and yet I try to be a better person myself in any way that I can. It is extremely admirable of Jason to allow love back into his heart when he really doesn't need to. He kills and he protects because he has this love of society. It may have been shaped by anger and hatred, but Jason has found his place amongst people who love him and value him. I think Ducra, from Red Hood and the Outlaws put it best in the image given below.

To end this tangent, I love Jason Todd and all of his sexy dangerousness, but it's far more than that. As much as Jason may be dangerous and snarky, he loves his family without a shadow of a doubt. I look up to Jason Todd because despite all of his pain and all of his trauma, he still choses to love. Jason Todd is a character who is someone I love because despite all of his flaws and having a very toxic fandom, he still serves as a character filled with so much heart and so much passion. I wish more writers would understand that. But for now I will live with what I have. Even though the fandom may be vocal about it's hatred for his characterization, I choose to love Jason regardless because he is a character who chooses love and acceptance regardless of his pain. Jason Todd is by no means a good person in any sense of the word. He has easily killed upwards of 100 people by now. He is a character who is flawed and complex but ultimately is one who powers forwards and finds love and heart in a place from so much pain and anguish. That is what I love about Jason Todd. After all, to quote a famous undead robot superhero, "What is grief, if not love persevering?" Jason Todd chooses to love despite all of the trauma and pain and grief. Yes, he is hardened in his exterior, but inside there is a man with a lot of love to give and someone who deserves the world in my eyes.

[simpurnatural]

The Big Bad

Summary: Sam has to escort you to prison after you got convicted for a crime. After hearing all your sex related jokes and little comments, he decides to teach his newest prisoner a lesson.

Warden!Sam Masterlist

Click here for part two

Warden!Sam x Reader

Warning ⚠️: NSFW, Smut, Cussing, Dirty-Talk, chains (ig bondage), slight degration.

Any writing errors? Point them out! Love some helpful feedback! <3

ENJOY!

A devilish smirk danced on your lips as you strutted down the prime path. People who once considered you a friend stared at you in horror. What you did was heinous so that Niki could no longer look at you in the eyes and that the younger boys you called brothers couldn’t even utter your name.

“I’ll give Dream your greetings,” you taunted as the chains on your wrists and ankles clanged.

“Keep moving,” Sam, who had barely spoken a word muttered. He pushed you forward slightly as Pandora’s Vault came into view.

“Wow,” you said in fake awe, giggling slightly “We’re going into your playpen Sammy?” beginning to skip towards the entrance “How exciting,”.

As you both stood in the portal Sam says “You do know that you could be in here for life, right?” to which you nodded all to happily.

“But you know me so well Sammy...I’ll be out in no time,”.

You went through several body pat downs and tests to make sure that you brought nothing in. All your jokes and remarks would have already made Sam lose his patience. After what seemed like a little over an hour, Sam tossed you an orange inmate uniform.

“Strip and put that on now,” he instructs.

“Turn around,” you reply to which the warden shook his head “Ah, so someone wants a show?” you teased and walked up to him.

“I said now...Don’t make me do it for you,” Sam warns, his taser letting out a small zap.

“Oh but I’d love that,” you replied, shrugging the shoulder of your top off.

“Well, if time won’t teach you a lesson” Sam sighed as he pulled at the chain around your neck. “I guess I’ll have to,”.

Sam ripped you off your shirt and jeans, leaving you in a bra and underwear. He gave your ass one good smack which echoed through the cell.

You let a moan which made the tent in his pants form. He yanked you to the ground and propped you on your knees.

Ridding himself of his trousers and boxers, his length sprung out. He grabbed your jaw and shoved his cock right on in.

“I’d never thought such a pretty thing like you would say such naughty things.” Sam sighed, watching as you tried not to choke. “So helpless,” he commented as tears formed in your eyes.

One hand was guiding your mouth and other was running through his hair. Sam let out a content groan as his pre-cum and your drool dripped out of your mouth. With a few thrusts into your mouth and causing his tip twitch, he released.

He pulled out and pulled you back to your feet and said “Swallow,” and he pulled off his shirt.

Sam pushed you onto the cot and pulled your wet underwear off. You moaned at the friction as he pulled your bra off as well. He took the chain around your neck off and used it as cuffs around your wrist.

“Oh f-fuck,” you breathed shakily as he lifted one of your legs.

“I didn’t ask you to talk dirty whore” he says, wrapping his hand around your neck.

He slammed right into you, not even allowing you to adjust to his thick cock. Purposefully not hitting your g-spot. Sweat beads began to trail down both your faces.

Sam was big but you didn’t think he was this big. The feeling of him stretching out your walls as he whispered how you could barely handle it made you feel so weak. You let out a whine as he came inside you once more.

“Now I want you to use your words,” Sam sighs “I want you to beg,” he adds, watching your legs shake at the intensity.

“P-please...fuck m-me” you said, merely over whisper. Sam’s hand grew tighter around your neck.

“I didn’t quite catch that,” he replies.

“Oh please fuck me with your c-cock,” you moaned.

Sam didn’t refrain from going feral. The way his hips snapped into yours was animalistic. You were a moaning mess as he slid a hand near your sensitive bud.

He rubbed it so fast that vision blurred from the overstimulation. You were crying out his name as he slammed into you.

“I’m so close Sam,” you say shakily, pleading with your eyes that he’d let you.

“Then cum little slut, cum around my cock” he replies before rubbing your bud at an alarming speed.

“Oh sHIT” you gasped as a wave of euphoria washed over you. You were definitely seeing stars at this point.

”What a good girl,” Sam praised as he pulled out and threw a blanket over you.

The sound of his belt buckling brought you back to reality. He wiped the sweat off of his face before putting his shirt back on.

Your whole body was shaking but that didn’t mean the punishment ended here. Sam pulled your legs apart and slid a little toy inside you. With a little click it began to vibrate.

“F-fuck you,” you moaned and he let out a chuckle while locking you in your cell .

“I’ll be back,” he hollers back, waving his keycard and countless keys in the air.

Hoped you liked it! You can request stuff if you want as well!