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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 year

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Chapter 8.5: 007- Peña, Agent Peña

Summary: After Javi's surprise on the Peña ranch, you had already had the best night of your life. Little did you know, your night was just beginning.

Word Count: 4.9K (This is as short as it's ever gonna get, this is just who I am)

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (wrap it up), creampie, praise (oh boy, does Javi tell you what a good job you're doing), semi-public nudity?? (not really, but you'll see!!), mentions of eating/food, mentions of alcohol, mentions of loss of a parent, you and Javi being absolute goofballs and being lovesick idiots

A/N: SO. I finished Chapter 8 and went to go walk my dog, and the song "Would That I" by Hozier came on, and it 100% is the inspiration behind this mini chapter. I literally came up with the idea for this chapter and wrote it in less than 24 hours because Javi and Osita live in my head rent free at all times being the cutest two idiots to ever exist. Enjoy this fun lil bit, it's honestly probably my favorite thing that I've written for this series so far!!!

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“I’m not sure if cold, post sex and first I love you’s is the way that your dad intended us to eat these enchiladas, but holy shit are they delicious.” You and Javi laughed, finishing the last bites of the enchiladas verdes Chucho had packed for the both of you. It probably would have made more sense to eat dinner almost an hour ago when Javi had first taken you out to watch the sunset in the back of his truck, but, no offense to Chucho’s enchiladas, having the most romantic sex of your life followed by Javi telling you that he loved you for the first time seemed to take higher priority to you.

“These ones are actually pretty good, I will give him that. Thank God he’s finally starting to get better at cooking, a few months ago his food was practically inedible.” Javi shook his head, wiping his face with the back of his hand as gathered both of your cleared paper plates and forks, tossing them into the empty paper bag Chucho had sent them with.

“Actually? I didn’t know he had come such a long way in his cooking career in such a short time.” You snickered, pulling some of the blankets laying at the edge of the truck bed over you as you scooted yourself closer to Javi, laying your head against his chest as you snuggled next to him. Pulling you closer, Javi wrapped his arm around you, fingers tracing gentle circles along the back of his sweatshirt you were now wearing.

“Actually. He never cooked until my mom died. One day he called me while I was still in Colombia and told me he had found one of my mom’s recipe books and was gonna teach himself how to cook. When I came home, he insisted on making me dinner every night so he could show off whatever he was learning. I ate a lot of sandwiches after he fell asleep the first few months I was home.”

“Well despite the terrible food you had to eat, that’s actually really sweet. Glad I came around when I did so I only have to reap the benefits of his good cooking and not suffer along with you.” You giggled as he squeezed you before giving you a playful shake wrapped in his arms. “Can you cook at all, or is this a warning that you’re gonna subject me to your awful cooking too?”

“I can cook enough. Not a good cook by any means, but definitely not my Pops a few months ago. Can do more than Kraft Mac and Cheese, I’ll tell you that much.” He smirked, poking fun at the first meal you had made. You sat up, giving him the biggest stink face you could muster without bursting into laughter.

“Okay, first of all, rude. Second of all, don’t act like you wouldn’t have eaten an entire second pot if I hadn’t made one for you, Mr. Literally Will Literally Eat Anything Under The Sun In World Record Time.”

“If I seem to remember correctly, you weren’t doing a lot of complaining after I ate, Osita.” He winked at you as you nudged your elbow into his side before he grabbed you, rolling you over and playfully wrestling you into the pile of pillows and blankets beneath you. “C’mere, Hermosa.” He wrapped his arms around you as you giggled and squirmed beneath him, trying to wiggle your way out of his grasp. You kicked your feet as he kissed at your neck, his mustache ticking you with each peck of his lips. Using all your might, you were able to roll over on top of him, straddling his lap as he lay on his back, breaking free of his grasp.

“Can’t get me that easy, Peña. Wrestling was the only way I got anything from my brothers for the first ten years of my life.” You smirked as you leaned down to kiss him as his fingertips gripped into your hips, pulling you further on to his lap.

“Could think of worse ways to lose a wrestling match.” Javi’s face smug as he gestured to how you were sitting on top of him, letting out a quiet groan as you started to grind into his lap, feeling him already half hard beneath you. “Careful, Hermosa. Not gonna be so nice if you’re gonna try to play dirty.” He raised his eyebrows, waiting for you to make the next move.

Still bent over him, you kissed up his neck and jaw before nipping at his ear. “Last time I checked, you liked it when I played dirty.” Your whispers left jaw slack, pressing up into you, his dick already straining against the fabric of his sweatpants.

“Fuck me.” He murmured under his breath as you began to grind harder into his crotch. “You wanna play dirty, baby? I can play fuckin’ dirty.” You could see the lust filled in the dark pool of his eyes, biting down on your lip, already feeling the slick pooling between your legs with each sway of your hips. “You already wet for me, baby?”

This man read you like a book- like he had every fucking page memorized. “Mmmhhhmm.” You nodded, feeling how soaked the fabric of your sweatpants already was as you felt your clit rub deliciously against Javi’s dick, hard and heavy underneath you.

“I know you are, dirty girl. Want me to touch you baby? Want me to make you come before I fuck that perfect pussy again?” You nodded again, frantically shaking your head yes at his filthy words as you worked yourself against his length. He laughed to himself, shaking his head as he watched how blissed out you already were rubbing against him. “Too bad.”

You paused, shooting him a confused look. “What do you mean, too bad?”

“You know exactly what I mean. You wanna play dirty, I will too. You wanna come? You get yourself off like this.” He gave you a subtle nod of his head, gesturing to how you were sitting on top of his lap.

“Are you serious? Javi, c’mon, please.” You rolled your eyes at him as you crossed your arms over your chest, trying to play off how desperate you already were for him.

“Rules are rules baby. Fight dirty, play dirty. C’mon pretty girl, I know how needy you are, how wet that pretty pussy is for me.” He mewled as he toyed with the waistband of your sweatpants, fingers brushing against your skin. He dug his fingers into your hips, slowly pushing them back and forth against his lap, encouraging you to pick back up your pace brushing up against his dick with every motion. “There you go, hermosa. That’s my girl. Just like that, baby.” He praised as you found yourself rubbing harder and harder against him, slick coating your thighs. With his length, it wasn’t hard to feel how big he was, making it easy to find a sweet spot that brushed up against your sensitive bundle of nerves as you rocked your hips back and forth over him.

“Javiiiii, fuck.” You whined, feeling the heat build at the base of your spine as your clit rubbed harder and harder on his covered cock.

“That’s it, Osita. Doing so good for me, baby. God, you look so fucking pretty riding me like that, C’mon, I know you’re close sweetheart.” His praise had you climbing towards your high, each time you ground your hips into him had you closer and closer to coming undone. His name fell from your lips, moaning as he was gripping your hips again pushing you deeper into him.

“Javi, I’m so close. Fuck, fuck fuckkkkkk.” You whimpered as you felt the euphoria rush through you, gushing, feeling your pussy throb from the intensity of your orgasm. You slumped into him, face falling on to his chest as you caught your breath.

“Such a good girl, Osita. My good fucking girl. Did so good for me baby.” He whispered in your ear as hand his hands along your body, trembling at his touch. “Still want me to fuck you, dirty girl?”

“Yes, holy shit, yes.” You moaned. “Please, I need you so bad Javi.” He helped you pull your sweatpants down, kicking them off your feet as you straddled back over Javi, sitting on top of his thighs. Slipping your fingers under his waistband, you pushed the pants down, revealing his dick, already red, precum leaking from its tip, leaving a stain on his sweatpants. You lifted yourself up, slowly sinking down on his length, each inch splitting you open with the sweetest stretch. Even without his fingers to warm you up, you were so wet that you took him easily, feeling yourself bottom out on his cock as Javi let out an audible groan. His hands reached around, giving you a light smack on your ass before his fingers kneaded into your flesh. You began to raise yourself up and down along his length, swirling your hips as your hands tugged at the hem of his sweatshirt that you were wearing, ready to take it off. His hand grabbed your wrist, stopping you before you could get any further.

“Keep it on. Fuck, I love seeing you in my clothes.” He bit down on his lip as you nodded, rubbing your hands up and down his chest as you threw your head back, drunk on the way his dick felt hitting against that sweet spot inside you. The hair around his base rubbed against your clit, making you whine as you picked up your pace. “Jesus Hermosa, fuck me. Taking me so well. My sweet girl.” His voice was thick and raspy between his heavy breaths, his eyes glued on your every move as you rode him.

Suddenly, you felt him shift. Sitting up with his back pushed up against the truck, he wrapped his arms around you pulling you in so you were chest to chest, foreheads pressed against each other. You could feel him thrust up into you, his cock punching that magical spot that made the heat at the base of your spine creep up your back. “Javi, fuck baby, you feel so good. Fuckkk.” You tugged at his thick curls, burying your face in the crook of his neck, the scent of his sweet and spicy cologne clinging to his sweatshirt.

“I know, hermosa, I know. Fuck, you’re so wet and tight, baby. Gonna give me one more? Soak my dick before I fuck you full of me again?” You wrapped your legs around his waist, digging your fingers into his back as you felt yourself snap, screaming his name as pleasure ran through every inch of you. You could feel how tight you were clenching around his cock as you came, his thrusts pounding deeper and faster into you. It didn’t take long for him to meet his own end, only needing a few more pumps before you felt his seed spill into you, leaking down your thighs and into his lap as you slumped into each other.

“Fuck, Osita.” He whispered between his labored breathing, lifting his head off your shoulder, smiling at your blissed out face. “Jesus, I fucking love you.”

“I love you too, Jav. Super romantic with your dick still in me and your cum dripping down my legs.” You giggled, still sitting in his lap.

“It’s fucking hot, is what it is. Fuck me, you’re so sexy. What the fuck did I ever do to deserve such a beautiful woman who fucking loves me like you?”

“God, you’re so sweet. Get your dick out of me before I start crying again, you menace.” You both laughed as you shifted off of him, grimacing at the mess you had left behind in Javi’s lap. “Do you have any towels, or leftover napkins? Sorry, I made a fucking mess. So much for those showers before we left.”

Javi paused for a moment before a sly grin crept across his face. “Ostia, can you swim?

You raised an eyebrow at him, very confused by his question, considering you were surrounded by a gigantic, grassy field. “What? Yes, of course I can swim? Why are you asking me that? How is knowing if I can swim helpful right now?”

His smile turned giddy, smirking at you as he shimmied his sweatpants back over his legs. “C’mon, get in the truck.” He slid himself off the back of the truck bed, standing up and outstretching his hand toward you. You quickly pulled your sweatpants back on too, following behind him as he helped you out of the truck and picked you up to put you in the passenger seat.

“Javi, what the hell are we doing? Are you gonna go throw me in a trough or something? Listen, I love those cows, but I am not gonna be happy if you toss me into a bucket full of dirty cow spit water.” You crossed your arms at him, waiting for a response.

“You’ll see.” He winked at you before shutting your door, hopping over to the driver’s side and starting up the car.

“You’re lucky I love you.” You grumbled, still crossing his arms at him. He reached over the center console, giving you a quick kiss before pulling away and shifting the truck into drive.

“I’m a very lucky man, indeed.” You finally shifted out of your playfully grumpy demeanor, melting as Javi stared at you, his sweet, puppy dog eyes making your heart explode every time they landed on you. You turned up the radio as Javi pulled away, heading the opposite direction that you came from, his headlights shining on a thick patch of trees at the end of one of the pastures. Driving a little deeper into the wooded area, Javi put the car in park, leaving you even more confused than when you left. He smiled at you as he shut off the ignition, hopping out the door before coming around to your side, helping you out of the car.

“God, I thought driving me out to the middle of the field was bad, but taking me out into the woods in the pitch black? You really never are beating these serial killer allegations, I’m afraid.”

“You’re the worst, do you know that?” Javi shook his head as he grabbed your hand, pulling you along with him as he began to walk through the trees.

“I’m just saying! Listen, if you really wanted- Hey! Hey! Put me down!” You squealed as Javi picked you up, flinging you over his shoulder as you pounded your fists against his back, kicking and giggling with each step he took. God, was he strong. He carried you like it was nothing, laughing to himself as he watched you try to wriggle your way out of his fireman hold. Letting out a huff of defeat, you slumped further into him, staring at the ground as he took each step.

“At least I have a good view of your ass from here.” You snickered as he continued walking.

“You really like my butt, don’t you?” He laughed, rustling you in his grasp, still flung over his shoulder.

“I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, you are built like a God, Javier Peña. You’re very much proving your point right now carrying my fat ass through the woods.”

He stopped, setting you down so you were facing towards him, placing his strong hand under your chin before tilting it up towards him. You gazed up at him, a surprisingly serious look spread across his face. “Hey. I love your ass. I love your body. Every curve, every single bit of you. Okay?”

“Okay.” You softly replied, pulling you in tighter as he kissed the top of your head. “So are you gonna tell me where the hell we’re going, or are you just gonna keep carrying me through the woods?”

“Turn around.” He nodded his head, gesturing behind you. As you spun around, you saw the moonlight sparkle off ripples of the pond in front of you. Rocks and tall grass surrounded the edges, water from a small stream flowing from behind the reeds into the pond. An old, worn wooden dock sat at the end, hovering over the first few feet out into the water. You turned back around to look at Javi, now smirking at your pleasant surprise with his most recent mystery. “I was out here every day as a kid in the summer. Nothing much, but it was deep enough to swim in. Haven’t been back here since high school, probably.”

“Is this where you’d take all the ladies to woo them with your swimming skills?” You joked, giving Javi a nudge as he stared around the pond.

“No.” He laughed, shaking his head. “Just me and my friends, sometimes my cousins when they came over, if I was lucky.”

“Well, I feel very honored to be the first lucky woman to get to see this secret pond.” You replied, slipping your sweatpants off your waist, leaving your bottom half exposed. Javi’s jaw dropped for the second time today watching you strip yourself of your clothes. “What?” You looked at him as your sweatshirt came next, dropping in a pile next to your pants, leaving you fully naked in front of him. “Aren’t we getting in?” You tilted your head at the pond, smirking at Javi who was now speechless.

“You sure?” He said, gulping as he looked you up and down, your soft skin glowing in the moonlight.

“Would I be standing here naked if I wasn’t?” You shrugged your shoulders as you raised an eyebrow at him. “You gonna swim in your sweats or am I gonna keep standing here like a naked idiot waiting for you?” Before you could say anything else, Javi’s clothes were on the ground next to yours, leaving you both bare, hidden amongst the secluded trees. This time, you grabbed his hand, running as you pulled him to the end of the dock, abruptly pausing as you got to the edge. “Are there like, weird things in here? It’s deep enough to jump in, right?”

“Hermosa, just get in, you’re fine.”

“Okay, but like-”

“Osita, get in or I’m gonna push you in.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“You know I fucking will.”

“Ugh okay, okay! Just promise me-”

“1…”

“Javi, wait-”

“2…”

“I’m being serious, don’t you do it! Javier Jesús Peña, I swear to God-”

“3!”

Before you could finish, Javi had his arms wrapped around your waist, swinging you back and forth, throwing you over the edge of the dock, limbs flailing as you splashed into the water. You peeked your head up, running your hands over your face as you watched Javi laughing hysterically. You flung your hand against the water, trying your best to splash him as he still stood at the edge thoroughly amused with himself.

“I hate you, I hope you know that.” You grumbled, splashing him again. “Hey, wait, where are you going?” You shouted as you watched Javi turn around, making his way off the dock. It wasn’t long before you regretted asking the question, as Javi quickly turned around, getting a running start as he launched himself off the edge, drenching you as he drove into the water, making waves that splashed against you upon his entrance. You swam there for a moment, waiting for his head to pop up somewhere next to you, when suddenly, you felt something wrap around your ankle, making you absolutely screech at the top of your lungs. You swam as fast as you could back to the edge of the dock, clinging to the edge as you heard more hysterical laughter behind you, turning around to see Javi cackling to himself as you panted breathlessly, waiting for your heart rate to return to a semi-normal pace.

“Holy shit, I didn’t think I was gonna scare you that bad, Osita.” He came down from his laughter, looking over at you hanging from the wooden planks still trying to catch your breath. “I’m sorry, baby. Are you okay?” He swam closer to you, now seeming like he felt a little remorse for what he had done.

You took a few more deep breaths before letting go of the dock, looking back at him. Now only an arms’ length away from you, you swam full force towards Javi, wrapping your body around his, trying to wrestle him in the water. “You are an absolute jerk, you know that?” You grunted between your giggles as Javi grabbed you back, spinning you as you thrashed in the water, splashing it in his face before he grabbed your face to kiss him. Your legs locked around Javi’s hips, arms wrapping around his neck as his slipped behind your back, pulling you closer, feeling weightless in the water. He drew away for a moment, taking one of his hands to caress your face, rubbing his thumb along your jaw.

“I forgive you, I guess.” You smiled as you sat there for a moment, taking in every detail of his face. His messy wet hair, his chocolate brown eyes, the way his mustache shifted above his lips as he smiled, everything about him that made you love him even more than you thought you already could. The way he looked back at you made you feel like there wasn’t anyone else in the world who could ever love you more.

“God, you’re so beautiful. I love you, Osita.”

“I love you too, Javi.”

He brought you in closer, placing another gentle kiss on your lips. He pulled away again, this time with a look of panic washing over his face.

“What? Are you okay?”

“Was that your foot?”

“My feet are wrapped around your waist?” You looked at him curiously.

Trying his best to keep calm, Javi swam you both closer and closer to the shore, still carrying you with him as you stepped back on to land. This time, it was your turn to laugh at him, suddenly realizing why he had gotten out so quickly. “Not big and brave now, huh?”

“At least I didn’t scream like you.”

“Oh shut up.” You giggled as he set you back down, now sopping wet and shivering next to your pile of clothes. “Any way to explain to your dad why the hell we’re both coming back soaking wet?” You grimaced as you started to pull your sweatshirt over your wet body.

“We’re not.” His face smug as he followed suit opting to only put on his sweatpants, leaving him shirtless as you both headed back through the trees.

“So…. What? You’re just gonna ask your dad to close his eyes and ignore us when we come back inside?” You raised an eyebrow in confusion looking up at Javi as he reached down to grab your hand as you walked.

“No. To be honest, Pops is probably already passed out in front of the TV, but of course, you can’t walk through the front door without going past him. We’ll just sneak in through my bedroom window and he’ll be none the wiser.”

You stopped for a second before laughing at him, continuing to walk as you shook your head. “Sneak in? What are we, 16? I know you said you’ve never brought any girls down here before, but I have a very hard time believing this is the first time you’ve snuck a girl into your room, Javier Peña.”

“Only a few times.” He looked down at the ground sheepishly as you squeezed his hand.

“I’m just giving you a hard time, Jav. Wouldn’t be my first time sneaking in either.” You admitted, your cheeks turning slightly red at your admission.

“Really?” He perked up. “You don’t strike me as the type, but do tell.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You just seem like such a rule follower, maybe it’s the teacher in you.” He shrugged as you rolled your eyes. “What’d ya do?”

“Fair, I guess. I was 17. One of my friends was having a party at her parents house while they were on vacation, and being the rule follower that I am, I asked my parents and they said no. I was so mad because it felt like they always let my brothers go out and have fun and I never got to. So, once everyone was asleep, I snuck out, rode my bike all the way to my friends house, got drunk out of my mind, which is part of the reason why I can never drink vodka again, and by some miracle, was able to ride my bike back home. When I came in through the side door of the garage, my brother David was in there, already waiting for me. He told me that he could hear me singing at the top of my lungs halfway down the block. He took pity on me and helped my drunk ass up to bed and never told my parents. He’s always been my favorite brother. Then, I pretended to have the stomach flu for the next 3 days to cover up for my hangover.” You both laughed as you finished your walk up to the truck, Javi opening the passenger door for you as you stepped in.

“No vodka, duly noted. You trying to tell me your singing gets even more obnoxious when you’re drunk?” He smiled as you buckled yourself in.

“You love my singing, don’t lie. But um… maybe… Just a little. You’ll just have to deal with my sober serenading for now, sorry.” You smirked at him as you shrugged your shoulders, Javi laughing to himself as he shut the door behind you.

………..

As promised, you spent the rest of the ride to the ranch windows down, blaring “Go Your Own Way” from Fleetwood Mac, noting that even though Javi had put on the album not long ago, you were a bit distracted to actually listen to any of the songs. If it was anyone else, Javi would have rather been caught dead than singing along to anything, regardless of song, album or artist. But lucky for him, you weren’t just anyone. You were his everything. Javi was sad when you’re singing came to an end, lowering the music as you pulled up to the house, trying to remain as quiet as possible to not wake up his dad.

“Too bad you don’t have the James Bond soundtrack in your car, I feel like we’re on some sort of secret mission right now.” You whispered, trying to close the truck door behind you as quietly as possible.

“C’mon, you dork.” He replied, taking you by the hand and leading you around the edge of his house. You both tiptoed along the wood siding of the house, Javi leading you before stopping under one of the windows, slightly cracked open, pushing out of its frame. “Alright, if I lift you up, can you push it the rest of the way open and climb in?”

“Sure thing, Agent Peña. What number do you want to be, since you clearly can’t be 007, that one’s already taken. I don’t think they’ll let you be the next James Bond with that ‘stache.” You mumbled, stepping in front of Javi as he got ready to lift you up.

“Will you just get in the window, please?” He scoffed, squeezing his hands on your hips, getting ready to hoist you.

“Fine, fine, just say you wanna be lame and move on. I’m ready.” As Javi shot you up, your fingers wrapped around the edge of the windowsill, humming to yourself as you shimmied yourself in.

“Bada boommmm, bada booommmmm, bahnanah.”

“Are you seriously singing the James Bond theme song right now?” Javi looked up at the window as you pushed open the rest of the pane, now looking down at him.

“Yeah, at least one of us should have a little fun with this. You need my help getting in?”

He hadn’t even answered your question before he was already halfway through the window, pulling himself through and landing on the floor.

“Showoff.” You grumbled to yourself as he closed the window behind him. Wet and uncomfortable in your clothes, you stripped them off of you, drying yourself off from the towel you had left on Javi’s bed from your shower earlier. Javi did the same, shedding his sweatpants and throwing them next to yours before you both crawled under the covers, curling into each other. You pulled the comforter up over you, nestling against the warmth of Javi’s body. Laying your head on Javi’s chest, Javi ran his fingers through the ends of your hair, still damp from your swim. It wasn’t until you hit the bed that you realized just how exhausted you were, barely keeping your eyes open, your eyelids heavy with sleep.

“Javi?” You asked, looking up at him, your voice low and soft, letting out a quiet yawn.

“Yes, Osita?” He peered down at you, fingers still twisting through your locks.

“You really love me?”

He chuckled warmly, planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. “I really do. Con todo mí corazón. (With all my heart.) Get some sleep, Hermosa, I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

He paused, waiting for you to respond.

“Hermosa?”

The only thing he heard after that were your sweet snores humming against his chest, you already sound asleep in his arms. He gave you one more kiss on the head before pulling you closer, shutting his eyes as he whispered one last goodnight. “Buenas noches, Osita. Soy un hombre afortunado. Tienes todo mí corazón para siempre. Te amo.” (Good night, Osita. I’m a lucky man. You have all of my heart, forever. I love you.)

..........

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roosterm3attrash · 7 months

Text

101 ways to kill Barney Calhoun

I ended up making this list by going through multiple servers and people so here cuz I found it in my phone notes

Anyway the brilliant minds of the half-life fandom

1.) Waited pressure plate with tnt under it

2.) im going to leave mines under his mattress

3.) i’m setting a rake on his floor so he steps on it and whacks his face

4.) I'm giving him a bomb disguised as a cigar

5.) barney death 3: he ate what elvis presley ate….

6.) I would kill Barney Calhoun by slapping him so hard on the ass that it gives him cardiac arrest

7.) I drop him onto a pit of venomous snakes

8.) Im going to give Barney a beer but instead of beer it will be filled with deadly neurotoxin

9.) “now gordon, ive been keepin an eye out on this combine hideout for a while. they seem to walk in a certain pattern when crossing over to the entrance, which makes me think theyve buried mines all over the place. now, ive memorized the pattern, so im just gonna sneak on over, and you follow my lead, alright? dont worry, i know exactly where all the mines are.” and then he explodes

10.) that one episode of sponge bob where he eats the exploding pie and explodes

11.) set up tripwire then he falls into a tiger pit

12.) I type kill npc_barney into console

13.) slap the boobies off his chest so hard them fly around the world and hit the side of his head like water balloons

14.) i could marry him and slowly feed him mercury over a span for 3 years until he dies of mercury poisoning

15.) He tries to become a wwe wrestler but gets killed in a freak accident mid match

16.) I would kill him by making him a pizza but it’s covered in big chunks of lead but it’s hidden in the sauce and it’s a Chicago style pizza

17.) bring him to a highway and kiss him so hard he gets knocked onto the road and gets ran over

18.) Peeling him apart by the dna strand and eating it like spaghetti

19.) barney gets trampled by a stampede of horses

20.) giving him under the counter off brand viagra

21.) put him in a washing machine and turn it on

22.) shark attack

23.) pit of sharks

24.) barney gets criticized so badly he dies

25.) barney sits in an uncomfortable chair for too long

26.) He gets his arm caught in a bear trap w a beer used as a lure

27.) HE BECOMES THE CAT THAT TRAUMATIZED HIM. HE….YKNOW…..

28.) he gets stuck in a swimming pool like hes in the sims and dies from getting exhausted and drowning

29.) barney roasting marshmallows but his stick ignites into flames and he burns to death

30.) ATTACH SO MANY BALLOONS TO BARNEY HE FLOATS AWAY INTO THE SKY NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN

31.) barney gets rejected by gordon and he gets so sad his body shuts down

32.) I kiss him so tenderly on the lips that he melts into a puddle and dies

33.) i throw him in to a volcano so that he melt into a puddle and dies

34.) "I’ll turn him into a flea, a harmless, little flea, and then I’ll put that flea in a box, and then I’ll put that box inside of another box, and then I’ll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives…I’ll smash it with a hammer!"

35.) stick a bottle of beer into his throat, the whole bottle

36.) give Barney Calhoun a beer can full of poison

37.) hang a piano over the toilet and wait

38.) i think barney should have his spine ripped out through his mouth

39.) he goes to a bar and tries flirting with the bartender and the bartender takes out a shotgun and kills him on the spot

40.) punch him so hard in the penis that he shatters like a brittle glass

41.) bite him in half

42.) I'm grinding him in a giant shredder

43.) bro took a bath in hot mac 'n cheese

44.) i put him ina giant caldron full of water and i begin boiling him down to gelatin and broth

45.) barney accompanies the crew to the borealis and he steps over thin ice and gets dunked into the below zero water and freezes to death

46.) barney calhoun gets carried away by a tornado

47.) took barney on a vacation to Hawai’i and pushed him into a volcano

48.) He dies and he's never mentioned again and nobody cares

49.) died of tummy ache

50.) Stepped on by a strider

51.) shrinked until he disappeared completely

52.) blasted into the sun

53.) Stab him with 300 pencils made with real lead

54.) slip and falls and dies

55.) put him into a Minecraft furnace

56.) Barney ignores the wet floor sign and slips and cracks his head

57.) while swimming in the swimming pool he swims to fast and smashes his face against the pool's wall

58.) he gets a concussion and drowns

59.) i want to put him through a lunchmeat slicer

60.) He falls off a dumb huge cliff

61.) he lives his life to the fullest and at his deathbed at age 93, June 29th, 6:12 am he passes away

62.) he eats a burgie with too much grease and gets a heart attack

63.) testicular cancer

64.) He should get sucked into a fan while trying to fix it at Black Mesa and literally no one comes looking for him

65.) The Pita Bread Room

66.) slipped on a Banana peel

67.) ran over by a crap ton of shopping carts rolling down the hill

68.) barney overheats in a fursuit

69.) he has sex so bad that he dies

70.) Barney dies because i fucking kill him with a shovel 🖕

71.) barney eats the gas station sushi

72.) barney faints via twirling around and holding his hand in front of his forehead, and then slowly lying down with a flower in his hands to indicate death

73.) When they turn off the suppression fields he just blows up

74.) barney gets crushed by a giant boulder thats all i got son

75.) barney goes to the beach that makes you old

76.) His head spontaneously combusts and pops like corn

77.) erectile dysfunction

78.) we should also have him get carbon monoxide poisoning

79.) barney gets gaussian blurred into nothingness

80.) he eats 20 year old expired mcdonalds burger and contracts the worst case of food poisoning youve ever seen

81.) Have we done tying him to a train track like a damsel

82.) he dies in a glue trap

83.) barney develops lactose intolerance over the years of combine occupation and he drink milk and then dies from shitting hinself to death

84.) he should chocke on his favourite food

85.) barney gets lead poisoning from a 1990s garfield glass mug

86.) he chokes on plastic

87.) barney gets thrown throw a glass window from a 15 story building

88.) gordon gives barney a wedgie so bad that he splits in half and dies

89.) gordon and barney divorce and barney dies from heartbreak

90.) alyx and gordon have enough of barney’s snoring so they smother him in his sleep with a pillow

91.) he trips while walking with gordon and impales himself on gordons crowbar face

92.) if he were the size of an ant he'd be ok instead he blows up like a watermelon and his remains are fed to lamarr by a very delighted kleiner. he fucking hated barney

93.) dog roughhouses with barney and accidentally obliterates his spinal cord

94.) barney gets poisoned to death by his own chumtoad

95.) coats him in eggs and flour and fries him

96.) snatched by a hawk and eten alive

97.) barney gets to participate in a danganronpa killing game and gets executed

98.) barney opens the love-letter-for-you.txt.vbs file and it kills him

99.) elaborate rube goldberg machine to drop an anvil on barney

100.) barney dies in an Iron Maiden

101.) we should put barney under those old timey stone tablets meant to squish and torture people and make them talk

#half life #barney calhoun #half life 2 #hl

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m0nsterqzzz · 8 months

Text

What Did I Say about the Arrows?

pairing: katniss everdeen x reader

summary: your girlfriends hands are like sandpaper, so you decide to fix that.

warnings: none just pure flufffff, wait, one tiny little mention of the bomb dropper katniss kissed like 10 times throughout the movies

a/n: thank you @drima for the request i literally had so much fun writing this. hope i fulfilled your vision dear :)

( not me not knowing how to summarize it and putting whatever that is T-T )

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Humming along to the quiet jazz music playing from the small radio on the shelf, you stir the garlic sauce in the pan. The chicken sizzles in the one next to it, heat radiating off the stove and onto your face and you're suddenly thankful it’s cold outside as you open a window. This also makes it easier to watch the area outside your house, waiting for any sign that your girlfriend is home.

She’s been gone since seven am, out hunting like she does almost everyday. She’s always home in the evenings, usually bringing enough food to sell in the Hob and still have enough to feed you, her, and her younger sister, Prim. You cook while Prim does school work and a few chores, not trusting Katniss anywhere near a kitchen after the time she burned mac and cheese and almost caught fire to your two bedroom house. The instructions are literally on the box.

You met Katniss in school a few years before she volunteered for her sister in the games, and what started as you nervously asking her to be your partner in a school project turned into you guys hanging out everyday while she ate the soup you sell at the Hob in exchange for a few pieces of whatever she hunted that day. You always gave the meat to those in the town who needed it more, but she didn’t know that. She begged you to take of her sister and mother when you visited her in the Justice Hall before she was dragged to the capitol on reaping day, as if you weren't already planning on it. Then she kissed you when she arrived home, mumbling something like, “it’s always been you” as she hugged you tightly.

The sound of the front door opening brings you out of your memories, and you let out a small squeal when Katniss calls out, “Honey I’m home!” She uses the same line every single day, but you’ll never get tired of hearing it.

“Kat!” You run to the living room, practically jumping into her arms before she even finishes taking off her scarf. Her shoes are already off, as she knows the rule about not dragging snow into the house you and Prim clean everyday. The brunette easily catches you, letting you wrap your limbs around her like a koala bear as you guys stand there in the entryway, just basking in the bliss of being with her.

Suddenly somebody gags behind you, and you giggle as Katniss gently drops you on the ground. You land on your feet, turning to face the noise and laughing when you see Prim staring at you two with a disgusted face. “Can you guys like….not do that here? You’ve only been apart for like half a day.” You and Katniss share a glance before you both burst out laughing.

“Can we like, not kiss in our home?” “Exactly! You guys do get it! Thanks for understanding.” With that she walks away, and yours and your girlfriend's laughter slowly dies down as you stare into each others eyes. Her hand reaches up to gently caress your cheek, but you gently push it away.

She sighs, placing her hands into her pockets as she nervously looks down. “Katniss….I love you but I don’t want to rub sandpaper on my face. I thought I told you to start caring about your hands.” The archer sighs, placing her bow and arrows on the counter as she follows you into the bathroom. You always get on her about the damage she's doing to her hands, and she seems to care until the next day comes around.

The two bedroom house you bought a little closer to town than your girlfriend's original home wasn’t originally meant for you and her, but it just slowly happened over time that the two girls moved their stuff into your house. Now Prim's room is covered in all her old stuff, and you even bought a cat bed for Buttercup, her cat. You didn’t have much of a family growing up, so you didn’t exactly mind being surrounded by your favorite girls all day everyday.

You force her to sit down on the toilet lid that now always stays closed unless someone is using it after the time Buttercup fell in, and then grab a tug big enough for her hands and fill it with warm water from the sink. She lets you take her hands in yours, placing them in the warm water and beginning to gently rub the calluses. Eventually, they will soften and it will be easier to rub them off. Obviously they won't all come off, but her hands will feel a bit softer than they do right now.

“You told me you would start watching out for your hands Katniss.” “Oh….no nickname? You're mad.” You chuckle, leaning over to kiss her cheek before going back to the task at hand. “I'm not mad I just worry about you okay? I know it may not seem that important to you but it is to me alright? You need to start wearing gloves while you're hunting. Something to protect your fingers.”

She playfully scoffs, sending you a small smile as she asks, “And who is going to buy these luxury items?” She's not wrong. Prim asked for a new dress to wear to a school event a few months ago, and you and Katniss had to spend extra hours hunting or collecting things to sell at the Hob so there would still be enough money to survive and buy a dress. That was made of cotton and didn't cost too much but something like leather? Well that would cost a lot here.

Prim walks by the door at the moment with a cookie in hand, looking through the open door and making sure her family is okay before she says with a mouth full of the baked goods Peeta brought over, “Can you guys stop acting like an old married couple for like two seconds?” You both laugh, but she just playfully rolls her eyes and sticks her tongue out at her sister. You swat her hand gently with a chuckle. “Stop acting like a child, Katniss.” She huffs, narrowing her eyes at you. “She started it! She acted childish!” “Maybe that's because she's a child!”

Your laughter eventually fades and then it’s peaceful silence. “We'll figure something out okay? We always do.” You mumble, gently patting her hands dry and instructing her to try and remove the top layer of the calluses.

The girl nods, quietly sitting there as you take care of her before she begins to hum, “in the meadow” you hum along, and giggles are shared when the song ends.

The next day, she leaves around the same time she did yesterday, but today it’s heavily raining and you're worried. You know she's careful and wouldn’t do anything too risky, but sometimes Katniss gets caught up in providing for her family that she doesn’t exactly think about her own safety. But I guess you only have to fall in a ditch while it’s raining and wait for townspeople to help you once to learn to watch where you're stepping. At least you hope so.

While she's off doing that and Prim is at school, you spend the day lounging around the house reading books or drawing. You can’t stop thinking about what Katniss said though.

“And who’s going to buy these luxury items?”

Money has never really been an issue when it came to living with the two girls unless you wanted someone extra. You guys have enough of it to survive, to live off of, but you don't have enough to constantly go spend it on things like dresses and leather gloves.

Your mother taught you how to sew when you were a teenager, but you never used it because there wasn’t exactly a need to. She was well known and liked in this town for her clothes that she sold in the Hob, and everyone was a bit disappointed when she died and you didn’t carry on that business. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to, but you had never had much interest in it. She’d always told you that it was an art, and one that also payed well.

If you could make Katniss some clothes with the leather that your friend sells in the Hob, then use your mothers sewing machine that was given to you by her right before she died to sew some gloves for your girlfriend, her hands wouldn't take as much damage while she's hunting.

Now with an idea in your head, you bring the latter leading to the attic down from the ceiling and search through a few boxes. You come to one labeled with your name, opening it to see your mothers sewing machine. “You’re lucky mom. I’m finally trying your hobby again.” You mumble, grabbing it out of the box and taking it back downstairs.

You hide the machine under your side of the bed so Katniss won’t question why it’s out, then put on your coat and boats. Grabbing the woven basket that always sits next to the door after it’s been emptied out, you make your way to the edge of the forest. You stay by the edge and use tall bushes as your cover, praying Katniss won’t see you as you make your way to the garden she made for you. It’s got flowers, plants, and food. When your girlfriend realized how much you love cooking and finding different plants in the forest, she made you a garden about 130 years into the forest. It was originally a spot of land surrounded by trees, and you and Katniss would have picnics or hang out there when you were bored. You guys still do, but now you enjoy the sight of your beautiful flowers and plants while doing that.

Katniss is definitely deeper into the forest, but you’re still cautious about making too much noise so she doesn’t hear you as you pick some flowers and vegetables. Your friend sells a square of leather (about 7 inches wide and 11 inches long) for 3.30$ a piece. It would take a few of those to make the gloves, so as long as you pick enough good vegetables, flowers, and herbs from the forest, you should make enough to buy the amount of material needed.

You put a ton of stuff in the basket, leaving enough room for some herbs around the edge of the forest to sell to the doctors and give to Prim. Then it’s time to go to the Hob, looking around before sneaking back into town as if you were never gone.

The trade goes quickly. Money from the first few stands in exchange for the vegetables, then to the sweet old woman who always buys your flowers to give to her children or plant in front of her house, and then the herbs to some doctor who keeps his booth open at the market walkway. You don’t know his name, and you're not sure he knows yours, but you see him almost everyday and both hold a certain understanding of each other. You sell him the herbs to help save lives, and he doesn’t ask where you get them.

Lastly, you make your way to one of the last booths in the market, greeting your friend with a small smile. He has a few pieces of leather left, just the right amount for your project that he gives to you without hesitation. He offers a discount, but you know his kids need school uniforms after Prim asked you for some money for said outfit.

Then it’s finally time to go home, and it’s like four pm when you get home. Katniss will be back soon, so you decide to hide the materials next to the sewing machine and just make dinner with Primrose.

You spend the next few weeks sketching up ideas for the gloves, then making said gloves, also spending some evenings helping your girlfriend sooth away even more calluses. She doesn’t suspect a thing, and you're suddenly thankful that Prim is so good at keeping secrets when she comes home early from school one day and catches you sewing the left glove.

So, about four weeks later, you have a decent pair of leather gloves for your girlfriend. Thick enough to keep her warm and protect from the harsh string on her bow but still not be a bother to her while she's hunting. You’ve seen other gloves like the ones you were making at the market, so you copied them down to the last stitch. Their three fingered gloves, the pointer, middle, and ring finger being the ones with fingers as those are the three fingers Katniss holds the string of her bow with.

You're nervous to show them to her, but you’ve spent enough time with Katniss to know that she’d never make fun of you for giving her a gift. In fact, when you took up painting and made a horrendous picture of Buttercup, she hung it on the wall near her side of the bed without hesitation. She will never let you take it down.

You and Prim are making dinner when she comes home, and your hand fly's to your back pocket to make sure the gloves are still there. The young girl was off school today, so she helped you with the final details on the gloves and spent the rest of the time talking about a girl in her class as you waited for your girlfriend to come home. “Honey I’m home!” She calls out, and it’s silent for a second other than the sound of her removing her coat and boats before she walks into the kitchen and smiles at you two. “Hey guys.” She smiles, wrapping her arms around your waist and resting her chin on your shoulder.

“Hey Kat.” You mumble, letting your body relax into her arms as you stop stirring the food. You almost forget about the gift for a second, but the way Primrose sighs makes you remember. “I have a present.” “For me?” “No. For Casper the ghost.” “Yes for you Katniss!” She chuckles, removing her arms from around you and leaning against the counter as she waits expectantly.

You take a deep breath before pulling out the gloves, and then all your worries fade away with the grin that crosses her face. "You said we didn't have the money to buy them and you were right so I sold some flowers and veggies out of my garden and made them." Her smile falters a bit.

“But you love your flowers….why would you sell them?” You smile a bit, moving your hand up to caress her cheek as you say, “Let me ask you, do you like them? Is that why you're smiling?” Your girlfriend nods, the smile slowly coming back to her face as she looks down at the gift in her hand. “Well….yeah. I love them.” “Then it was worth it. And besides, they’ll grow back. Your happiness is much more important to me than some flowers.”

The smile never leaves the archer's face as she puts the gloves on, squeezing her fists closed and then opening them as if testing them out. “What do you think?” You ask and her gaze doesn’t move from her hands until she suddenly sprints out of the kitchen. “Kat?” You run after her, almost bumping into her when you get to the living room where she’s already lining up an arrow with her bow. “Katniss!” She doesn’t listen as she lets the arrow fly through the open window, and it’s silent for a second before Prim begins to laugh behind you.

You sigh, gently swatting the brunette's arm and then you sternly say as if lecturing a child- which isn’t far from the truth, “What did I say about the arrows Katniss Everdeen?” She sheepishly smiles before setting her bow back down on its spot next to the door.

“You said not to shoot them in the house unless there was an intruder or Gale came to visit.” “Exactly. Now go get the arrow.” She playfully sighs, going to put on her boots before she turns back around to place a small kiss on your lips. “Thank you my love. They’re amazing.” This makes your smile grow a bit, and it remains there as she puts on her boots and leaves the house to find her arrow.

“You know, I think she’s gonna marry you.” You practically choke on your spit as Prim speaks, but the girl is already gone by the time you gain your composure and turn around to face her.

#katniss everdeen x you #katniss everdeen x reader #katniss everdeen #the hunger games x reader #the hunger games

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dwntwn-strnlo · 1 year

Text

WHEN I

ⅰ. 𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐑

❝ᵐᵃᵗᵗ ˢᵗᵒᵖ ᶠᵘᶜᵏⁱⁿᵍ ˡᵘʳᵏⁱⁿᵍ❞

·.★·.·'¯'·.·★★·.·'¯'·.·★.·

↳ ˢᵒᶜⁱᵃˡ ᵐᵉᵈⁱᵃ, ⁱᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ

check out on wattpad for an easier and cleaner read!

prev. ⇆ next.

🄽🄾🅆 🄿🄻🄰🅈🄸🄽🄶 . . .

❝i've been thinkin 'bout you . . .

. . . do you think about me still?❞

ᴛʜɪɴᴋɪɴ ʙᴏᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ - 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘰𝘤𝘦𝘢𝘯

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐈.

chapter one

❝𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐑❞

💫

·.★·.·'¯'·.·★★·.·'¯'·.·★.·

↳ ⁱⁿˢᵗᵃᵍʳᵃᵐ

veraaaprince

liked by trinity_west and 196,372 others

veraaaprince summer 🫡😋

tagged // nicolassturniolo , trinity_west , macsimpson , matthew.sturniolo , christophersturniolo , jennnnyfoster , nathandoe8 , madifilipowicz

view all 912 comments

nicolassturniolo OKAYYYYY

↳ veraaaprince WOOOOOOOOOOO

username ate

username did you fall off the door

↳ matthew.sturniolo yeah and she died

. ↳ veraaaprince fuck you

. ↳ matthew.sturniolo i can still hear her annoying little voice sometimes

macsimpson she screamed the whole ride and everything

↳ veraaaprince ok.

↳ christophersturniolo wasnt it a kiddie ride too?

. ↳ matthew.sturniolo probably shes a little scaredy bitch

. ↳ veraaaprince yall suck

madifilipwicz PRETTYYY

nathandoe8 the popcorn 😕

↳ username i wouldve cried

. ↳ trinity_west @christophersturniolo cried like a litttle babyyyyy

. ↳ matthew.sturniolo its true he did

. ↳ christophersturniolo what the fuck

username i need friends like this

↳ username real

jennnnyfoster mother

↳ veraaaprince mother

username matt replying to everyones comments but not making his own smh

·.★·.·'¯'·.·★★·.·'¯'·.·★.·

↳ ⁱᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ

vera ; prince 🕺

matt ; matty ratty 🐀

chris ; kristof 🦌

nick ; nick jr 📺

trinity ; trinny winny 😋

jenny ; jenn city 🌆

mac ; cheesy 🫶🧀

11:27 pm !

prince 🕺

matt stop fucking lurking

jenn city 🌆

seriously

like what you doin bud 😭

matty ratty 🐀

Dont call me bud

and im not

kristof 🦌

then what are you doing

matty ratty 🐀

Commenting like the rest of you?

prince 🕺

mm i dont think so ☝️

nick jr 📺

matt.

matty ratty 🐀

Nick.

nick jr 📺

shhhh

trinny winny 😋

can i change his name

pls

pelase

please

cheesy 🫶🧀

literally why

kristof 🦌

kristof 🦌 changed matty ratty 🐀 to lurker 🥷

lurker 🥷

Chris I fucking hate you

prince 🕺

LMFAO

trinny winny 😋

what the fuck.

kristof 🦌

maybe be faster next time idk????

jenn city 🌆

i love this

lurker 🥷

Love what

jenn city 🌆

bullying you

loved by nick jr 📺

lurker 🥷 left the chat!

cheesy 🫶🧀 added lurker 🥷 to the chat!

cheesy 🫶🧀

stop being a fucking pussy matthew

emphasized by kristof 🦌 and jenn city 🌆

prince 🕺

oh boy

trinny winny 😋

woah there 😧

nick jr 📺

calm urself

lurker 🥷

Someone pls change my name back 🙏

kristof 🦌

NO 🙅‍♂️🔕👎❌

trinny winny 😋

we'll do it if you turn off your goddamn caps

lurker 🥷

Uhm

prince 🕺

matt PLEASE

turn off your caps

lurker 🥷

get out of here vera

cheesy 🫶🧀

HE TURNED THEM OFF

nick jr 📺

oh my

jenn city 🌆

whipped 🤨

lurker 🥷

excuse me?

jenn city 🌆

you heard me

trinny winny 😋 changed lurker 🥷tomatty ratty 🐀

matty ratty 🐀

thanks ig

kristof 🦌

literally get over urself kid

prince 🕺

thats crazy

trinny winny 😋

ok im done omfg

im going to bed

matty ratty 🐀

me too

nick jr 📺

yeah get outta here

cheesy 🫶🧀

oh boy

read 12:01 am !

💫

. . .

A/N

oh boy

idk how i feel abt this but

irl chapter next!

#WHEN I . . .#WHEN I . . . matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo x you #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo series #matthew sturniolo series #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo

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lostfirefly · 1 month

Text

Bugust. Day 12. Candles (Buggy x OC). Coz she looooves candles. Fun, sadness, memories.

"Cotton candy, I'm home. Brought your favorite wine." Buggy slammed the door shut. "You got a package from your sister."

There was silence.

"Cotton candy, are you home?"

Silence.

"Catherine?" Buggy's face changed. "Shit! No! No! Did I do something wrong again?" He opened the closet to check her things. "Fuck, thank God. Her denim jackets are here. She didn't leave me."

Buggy looked into the kitchen, but Catherine wasn't there. He opened the bedroom door and saw her sitting on the bed, fiddling with a teddy bear figurine under the lilacs.

"Hey. Are you okay?" Buggy asked with a little concern in his voice. "I've been calling you."

"My little bear!" Catherine quickly wiped her eyes and tried to smile. "I didn't hear you come back. I was deep in my book."

"Were you crying? Did I do something, huh? Tell me what I did." Buggy sat down on the bed and took her hand.

"What? No! I swear I was reading a book, it was just sad and reminded me of my parents." Catherine put the figurine on the nightstand, knelt down closer to Buggy, and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Everything is fine. Better tell me how was your day? Did you miss me?"

"Meh, as usual. Richie ate one of the sandwiches you wrapped for me. I went to check on him, and that furry sack ate my sandwich."

"Don't say that! I adore Richie. See, he loves the way I masterfully turn two slices of bread and butter into a sandwich." Catherine started stroking Buggy's hair. "I'm sorry you got a lousy cook, my love." She pecked his cheek. "But I can make you mac and cheese. Do you want? Just give me 10 minutes."

"Nah, let's order pizza." Buggy kissed Catherine's temple. "Oh, by the way. You have a package from Jules." He held out a small box to her. "I guess the delivery guy left it at the door."

"Let's see what's in it!" Catherine shook the box near her ear and started to open it. "Fuck! I completely forgot!" She pulled a candle out of the wrapping paper.

"Forgot what?" Buggy looked at her with interest.

"You know, when we were little, my parents, my sister and I used to have Mitchell Family Candle Nights."

"Mitchell Family Candle Nights? Are you serious?" Buggy laughed. "Sounds like you were a positive cartoon family. Didn't you hum a song when you made the candles? Didn't the animals of the forest come to help you?"

"Don't laugh, jerk!" Catherine punched him in the shoulder. "Yeah! We'd sit down in the living room or kitchen and make candles for each other. Each one had a different scent, and we'd write wishes for each other, put it in a box with the candle, and give it to each other. The candles were always a mess, but we loved it." Catherine twirled the gift in her hands. "After my parents died, Jules and I kept making these little happy ones for each other. I totally forgot to make mine this year. Shit!" Catherine became visibly upset.

"Hey, Cathie-pie, there's a note in there." Buggy pulled a small card out of the box and placed it in her hands.

"Oh, thanks. Let's read what it says." Catherine opened the card, ran her eyes over the lines and laughed. "Hah! Listen. "My beloved sister, I suspect you've been blown away by love so much that you've forgotten about our Candle Night. But I haven't forgotten, you little brat. I swear, you force me to come and visit you. That's why I'm sending you a blue candle to match the hair color of the one you left me for. It's my first warning to you! Okay, just kidding. Be happy with your clown, Cath. Love you!" Catherine sniffed the candle. "It smells like lavender. I like it! I'll go to the store tomorrow and buy everything I need and make her the candle. I don't want her to think I've forgotten our family traditions. Or mom and dad."

Buggy took the candle in one hand, and put his another arm around Catherine's waist. "That explains a lot now." He muttered to himself. "You know. Let's order a pizza, open your wine and light this stupid candle."

"Really?" Catherine smiled broadly.

"Like I have a chance to tell you no?" Buggy rolled his eyes. "You keep lighting them on fire anyway. Also.. About tomorrow.. Can I go to the store with you?"

Catherine smiled even more, clenched her hands into fists and stared at Buggy.

"Oh, no, that look! I know what's about to happen!" He split into pieces and stormed out of the bedroom. "No, no, no!! Back off, woman!"

"Wait!!! Buggy Bear!!! I just wanted to give you a hug" Catherine rushed after him. "Wa-a-a-ait!!"

#one piece #buggy the clown #buggy x oc #oc fanfiction #oc character #buggy the clown x oc #buggy live action #one piece live action #buggy one piece #opla buggy the clown #buggy fanfiction #buggy fic #buggy x catherine #one piece au #modern au #one piece modern au #one piece x oc #bugust

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scarletqueenx · 2 months

Text

chapter three - once upon a time

Dean Winchester x female oc

Summary: After experiencing an alternative life through the spell of a Djinn, Dean realizes that he is missing something in his life. He and Freya Holloway had been dating for a few months before his father disappeared and his journey with Sam began. Now, having made a deal to save his brother's life and with only a year to live, Dean considers reconnecting with the only girl he's ever had feelings for.

Author’s Note: English is not my first lenguage.

series masterlist

After nearly two days on the road, with a few stops for sleep and food, Freya was beginning to regret her decision to go with the Winchester brothers. Dean hated airplanes and loved his car, so the trips had to be by road. Something she wasn't used to.

That was precisely why they had stopped at another gas station.

"I don't understand, Dean. Why not?"

"Because I said so." He answered, looking through the window, hoping Freya wouldn't take long to get back to the car so they could finish that conversation.

"We got the Colt now!" Sam insisted, frustrated by his brother's refusal.

"Sam..."

"We can summon the Crossroads Demon..."

"We're not summoning anything."

"...pull the gun on her, and force her to let you out of the deal!"

"We don't even know if that'll work!" Dean exclaimed, hoping his brother would drop the subject.

"Well then we'll just shoot her! If she dies then the deal goes away!"

"We don't know if that'll work either, Sam!" He said, looking back at him. "All you're pitching me right now is a bunch of "ifs" and "maybes" and that's not good enough, because if we screw with this deal, you die!"

"And if we don't screw with it, you die!"

As she approached the car, Freya could hear them both yelling at each other. She was glad that the parking lot of that gas station was completely empty, or people would think they were crazy by talking about demons and death.

"Sam, enough! I am not going to have this conversation."

"Why, because you said so?" Sam scoffed, not noticing Freya getting back inside the car.

"Yes, because I said so!"

"Well you're not Dad!"

Freya felt how the tension increased after Sam's answer. That conversation couldn't end well and she couldn't say anything either, since it wasn't her place.

"No, but I am the oldest." Dean answered him, trying to remain calm. But this didn't last very long as his voice raised back. "And I'm doing what's best. And you're going to let this go, you understand me?"

After looking at each other angrily, Sam turned his gaze away looking out the window. That's when Freya noticed Dean's eyes landing on her through the rearview mirror.

Just after a few seconds of silence, he cleared his throat.

"Feeling better?" He asked, concerned.

Freya frowned. The argument between the brothers had almost made her forget the real reason she had gotten out of the car. She had gotten dizzy once again after four hours of nonstop driving.

"Yeah. Much better." She nodded with a slight smile peeking through her lips.

"Did you bring the food?"

"Yeah, I brought fries, some burgers and pie." She answered, setting the food bag between both of them. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Everything is fine. Right, Sammy?" Dean answered quickly, pulling out one of the burgers. "Thanks for the food, sweetheart."

After that the car went completely silent again. Only the sound of the engine could be heard as the three of them ate and Dean continued driving.

Feeling somewhat nostalgic and uncomfortable with the tension between the two brothers, Freya decided to put on her walkman headphones to listen to one of her favorite music albums, Rumors by Fleetwood Mac. She could feel Dean's gaze falling on her from time to time through the rearview mirror, but she still decided to ignore it.

Truth was that, since they had begun the drive, Dean had once again pulled away from her. Freya didn't blame him. Everything was so much different than the last time they had seen each other. Dean had seen his father die, he had seen his brother die, and he himself had made a deal with hell. Freya didn't seem to have changed much, but that wasn't the reality. Deep down she was a different person too. And Dean could feel that as he looked back at her.

As she listened to one of her favorite songs, a thought flashed into Freya's mind. Maybe they were just meant to be friends. And if she was honest, she was happy with that.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

Investigating what appeared to be a werewolf attack, since it fit the lunar cycle, Sam, Freya and Dean headed to the town hospital where the only living victim of the attack was being treated.

"I'm Detective Plant, this is Detective Page, and Detective Jones. We're with the County Sheriff's Department." Dean said as the three of them showed their badges to Kyle.

"Yeah, uh, I've been expecting you."

"You have?" Dean asked in confusion.

"All morning." He nodded. "You are the sketch artists, right?"

"Uh..."

"That's exactly it." Freya exclaimed with a smile shining on her face.

"Yeah." Dean nodded, looking at her. "That's her specialty. The things she can do with a pen...." He chuckled nervously. "But, listen, before we get started on that, I wanted to ask you, uh, how'd you get away?"

"I– I have no idea. I was hiding, and he found me. He was coming right for me and then he just... stopped. He stared at me with this blank look. And after that, he just took off running." Kyle explained.

"Okay." Freya nodded slightly, opening the small notebook in her hands. "Um, I'm going to need as much physical detail as you can remember."

"Uh yeah. Uh, he's about six feet tall..." Kyle tried to remember. As she listened to him, Freya began to sketch under Dean's watchful eye. "Dark hair..."

"Uhm, what, what about his eyes, what color eyes did he have?" She asked, looking up at Kyle.

"Maybe... blue?"

"Blue?"

"It was dark." Kyle shrugged.

"Did they seem..." Dean began asking but stopped to clear his throat before finishing his question. "Uh, animal-ish?"

"Excuse me?" Kyle looked at him with confusion painted all over his face.

"What about his teeth? You notice anything... strange about 'em?" Sam asked.

"No, they were just teeth." He answered shaking his head as Freya continued drawing in her notebook.

"Teeth, okay." She mumbled.

"How about his fingernails?"

Dean's question seemed to annoy Kyle. "Okay, look, he-he's just a-a normal guy, with normal eyes a-a-a-and teeth and fingernails." He said.

"Look, sir, it's okay if-"

"No." Kyle cut him off, his voice breaking on the verge of tears. "No. Those were my brothers. This guy, he-he killed my brothers. How would you feel?"

Freya could feel a lump in her chest at such thought. To lose Peter would be to lose a part of herself.

"Can't imagine anything worse." Sam admits, taking the words out of her mouth. Dean's eyes quickly fell on his brother as he nodded in agreement.

"I know this isn't easy but if you could remember any more details..."

"Th-there was one more thing. He had a-a tattoo on his arm of a cartoon character. Umm... it's, uh, it's the guy who's chasing the Road Runner."

"Wile E. Coyote." Dean exclaimed with a proud smile of his own as Kyle nodded.

"Yeah, that's it."

Freya continued with her drawing as a doctor entered the room.

"Kyle?"

"Dr. Garrison."

"How you holding up?"

"Okay, considering."

"You're, uh, Kyle's Doctor?" Pulling out his badge, Dean looked at the man dressed in a white coat.

"Yes." He nodded, looking at the three of them.

"Can I just ask you a few questions?" Dean asked.

"Sure." The doctor nodded, walking out of the room with him, leaving Sam and Freya with Kyle.

"Don't I get to see it?" Kyle pointed to Freya's notebook, who was just finishing the last touches on her sketch.

"Uh, yeah. Well, it's a, you know, a work in progress." She apologized, handing him the little notebook under Sam's watchful eyes, who raised his eyebrows in surprise at how good the sketch looked.

"Hm. It-it's really... good." Kyle said, earning a smile from the girl.

"Thanks." She answered. "And thank you for your time. I'm sorry about your brothers." Kyle appreciated Freya's sympathetic glance, giving her a small smile in return.

Sam and Freya left the room seconds later, joining Dean in the hallway. As they reached his side, Dean was quick to grab the notebook from her hands to look at the drawing.

"Art student, no doubt." He nodded, handing the notebook back to her. "It's pretty good, sweetheart."

"I told you that wasn't a lie." She noted, tucking it back into her jacket.

"You studied art?" Sam looked at her in surprise.

"Yeah, at a very prestigious school in California. I got a scholarship." Freya smiled, looking up at him. Sam nodded, sharing an amazed look with his brother.

"Impressive."

"So what did the Doc have to say about Kyle's brothers?" Freya asked, changing the subject as they left the hospital.

"Not much, they were D.O.A. at the scene. He did give me the lowdown on the coroner's report."

"Lemme guess, their hearts were missing?" Sam asked.

"Nope." Dean answered, which caused Freya to look at him in surprise. "But chunks of their kidneys, lungs and intestines."

"That's just gross." Freya said with a grimace.

"Yeah, also definitely not werewolf behavior." He noted.

"So, what?" Sam asked. "Demon? Attacker could've been possessed."

"Why would a demon stop halfway through an attack?"

"I think that, uh.. Could've... Yeah, I got nothing."

"Me neither." Freya signed. "Guess we'll have to figure out before someone else gets hurt or killed."

"You really got nothing?" Dean asked her as they approached Baby. "I thought you would have some idea having studied supernatural creatures all your life."

"Okay, first of all, that's my father's thing." She noted, opening the door to the backseats. "And Peter, because he's obsessed with horror movies. I never paid attention. When I started hunting, all the creatures I came across were ghosts, vampires, witches or werewolves. You know, the usual stuff."

"So you have never hunted a wendigo or a shapeshifter for example?" Sam asked.

"No. Why? You two have?"

"You'd be surprised, sweetheart." Dean smirked, causing Freya to roll her eyes at him as she got inside the car. Quickly followed by the two brothers.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

It didn't take long for Freya and the Winchester brothers to return to the hospital. They had barely begun to search for information about supernatural beings that might fit the case when they were informed about another victim.

"Detectives." Dr. Garrison greeted them in the patient's room.

"Dr. Garrison."

"What the hell is going on here?" He asked with concern. "My whole town is going insane."

"We'll let you know as soon as we do." Sam assured him as they enter the room. The doctor nodded, leaving the room to let them talk to the victim.

"Miss Watson?" Freya approached her as she flashed her detective badge. "Hi. We just need to ask you a few questions."

"Do we have to go over this again? Now?" She asked, tired and affected by the situation she had experienced.

"We'll try to be brief." Freya assured with a small, sympathetic smile. Giving them a little nod, Julie invited them to speak.

"Miss Watson, can you tell us how you got away?" Sam asked.

"I didn't eat as much as Ken did, so I wasn't as out of it. And, when the old woman was... carving up Ken, I shoved her, and she fell. Cracked her head on the stove." She paused, looking down to her hands and taking a few breaths before looking back at Freya. "She's dead, right? I-I killed her?"

"Do you have any idea why she'd do this to you?" Dean asked this time.

"No! One minute she was a sweet old lady and the next she was, like, a monster."

The case was getting more and more complicated, but it also seemed more familiar. At least to Sam. The young Winchester couldn't help but notice the similarities of what Julie had experienced to a story he had read.

"Can you remember anything else?"

"Um, yeah. Did you find a little girl there, by any chance?"

"A... little girl? At the house?" Freya looked at her in confusion. Julie nodded.

"I thought I saw her outside the window. She, she just disappeared. Just vanished, into thin air." She explained. Sam and Dean looked at each other. "It m-must've been the drugs."

"This disappearing girl, what did she look like?" Freya asked then.

"Does it matter?" She frowned.

"Yes. Every detail matters."

"She had this dark, dark hair and really pale skin. She was around eight. She was a beautiful child. It was... odd to see her in the middle of something so horrible." Julie explained with a sigh.

"That's really helpful, thank you." Freya gave her a soft smile. "We're sorry for the loss of your husband."

"Thank you." Julie mumbled before they left the room.

"Okay. Any ideas? Because I got nothing." Freya said as they went back to the car.

"I think we should check the house." Sam answered. "Maybe we could find something there."

Dean nodded in agreement, climbing into the driver's seat. Freya settled back into the back seats, pulling her hunting journal from inside her backpack.

"Do you keep a record of everything?" Sam asked as he looked back at her.

"It's a habit." She shrugged. "Besides, this way I don't forget the details for when I tell Peter. It's also good for future hunts. You never know."

At her response, Dean and Sam couldn't help but share a look. It was impossible for both of them not to see how that was something Freya had in common with their father.

"So, what do you think? A demon? A ghost?" Freya asked after a few minutes.

"I literally have no idea." Dean admitted. "All of this seems so odd. We might need to call your dad or Bobby."

Freya nodded, getting lost in her own thoughts and in the words written in her diary.

The drive to the old lady's house where Julie and her husband had been attacked didn't last long. Freya and Dean separated into difference rooms in search of any demonic signs while Sam check the EMF for any ghost.

"Well, there's no sulfur anywhere." Freya said after some minutes. "How about the EMF?"

"Yeah, it's going nuts. When I went over here by the window... There's definitely a spirit here."

"Who stood outside the crime scene and watched." Dean pointed out.

"Looks like."

"What the hell do you make of that?" Freya asked, confused.

"Actually, I do have a theory. Uh, sort of." Sam said, gaining her and Dean's attention.

"Hit us."

"Well, thinkin' about fairy tales."

"Oh that's—that's nice. You think about fairy tales often?" Dean teased him. Freya smiled with amusement.

"No, Dean, I'm talking about the murders." Sam insisted. "A guy and a girl? Hiking through the woods, an old lady tries to eat 'em? That's Hansel and Gretel. And then we got three brothers, arguing over how to build houses, attacked by the Big Bad Wolf."

"Three Little Pigs."

"I'm sorry, those are supposed to be fairy tales for kids?" Freya frowned, looking completely lost in the conversation.

"Yeah." Sam nodded. "You've never read them?"

Freya shook her head.

"I thought you had the white picket fence and apple pie kinda life." Dean commented, looking back at her.

"Okay. Yeah. I did. But... I was never interested in fairy tales. Sorry."

"Can we go back to my theory?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, sorry." Dean nodded. "I thought those things ended with, uh, everybody living happily ever after?"

"No, no. Not the originals. See the Grimm Brothers' stuff was kinda the folklore of its day, full of sex, violence, cannibalism. Now, it got sanitized over the years, turned into Disney flicks and bedtime stories."

"So you think the murders are uh, what? A re-enactment? That's a little crazy." Freya said.

"Crazy as what? Every day of our lives?" Sam looked at her.

"Touché." She sighed.

"How's the creepy ghost girl involved?" Dean asked.

"Uhm... Well, she must've been here for a reason. I'm willing to bet you top dollar she was at the construction site too." His brother answered him.

"We gotta do research now, don't we?" Dean groaned.

"I'm afraid so." Freya sighed.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

Freya had lost track of how much time she and Dean had spent inside the town's public library. He was sitting across from her, looking through the computer as she went through the police reports filed the last few years.

Exhaustion was beginning to get the best of her, but Freya did her best to stay awake. Dean's hand touching hers was what snapped her out of her thoughts, bringing her back to reality. Her eyes quickly met his. His green gaze watching her with a gleam of concern and fondness.

"Did you find anything?" He asked.

"What do you think?" She sighed, straightening up in her seat.

"Yeah, I thought so." He sighed, standing up and grabbing his jacket. "Come on, let's go. We'll go get some coffee and meet up with Sammy."

"Yeah. I do need a coffee." Freya admitted, picking up the files.

"I know you do." Dean softly smiled at her.

Freya didn't seem to notice how his eyes followed her as she put the files back in place.

"You think it's weird that I've never read any of those fairy tale books?" She asked as she grabbed her jacket before they both headed for the library exit.

"Why would you think that?" Dean frowned.

"I don't know. Kids are cruel sometimes, you know, and I never really fit in at school. I didn't have the same interests as the rest. Princesses weren't my thing, but neither was playing sports. I used to spend recess reading ghost stories, obsessing about monsters and unsolved crimes. My teachers thought I was crazy, that one day I'd snap and commit some crime or something." She explained.

"Is that why you started acting like other girls?"

"I guess." She shrugged. "No one besides Peter seemed to understand me. Until I met you." Her eyes looked up at him, finding he was already looking at her. Silence settled between them, but it wasn't an uncomfortable or awkward silence. It was a pleasant one, familiar even.

"Freya, listen..."

"Hey, guys. Find anything?" Sam interrupted as he approached them, snapping them out of that connection.

Dean sighed and he shook his head as he looked at him.

"We checked every record they had. Found the usual amount of violent childhood deaths for a town this size." He answered as the three of them started to walk across the road toward a park.

"Okay."

"Wanna know how many were little girls with black hair and pale skin?" Freya asked.

Sam narrowed his eyes, resting his gaze on her.

"Zero."

"Zero! You wanna know how many little girls with black hair and pale skin that have gone missing? Right again. Zip. zilch, nada." She answered with frustration. "Tell me you've got something good 'cause we've totally wasted the last six hours."

Sam sighed.

"Well, you ever hear of Lillian Bailey?" He asked. Dean and Freya shook their heads in response. "She was a British medium from the 1930s."

"She got a thing for fairy tales?" Dean asked, confused.

"Nah, trances. See she'd go into these unconscious states where, uhm, get this, her thoughts and actions were completely controlled by spirits."

"A ghost puppet master."

"Yeah."

"Think that's what this kid is doing? Sending wolfboy and grandma into trances, making them go kill-crazy?" Freya questioned.

"Could be." Sam shrugged. "You know, kinda like uh, uh, spirit hypnosis or somethin'."

"Trances I get, but fairy tale trances? That's bizarre even for us." Dean commented as they continued walking through the park. But at that moment Freya stopped in her steps, causing them to imitate her. Their eyes meeting a frog on the ground in front of them.

"Yeah, you're right. That's completely normal."

"All right, maybe it is fairy tales." Dean admitted. "Totally messed-up fairy tales. I tell you one thing, there's no way I'm kissing a damn frog."

"Me neither." Freya mumbled.

"Hey. Check that out." Sam caught their attention, pointing to a house across the street. Pumpkins on each side of the porch, decorating it.

"Yeah? It's close to Halloween." Dean pointed out.

Sam shook his head.

"You remember Cinderella?" He asked. "With the pumpkin that turns into a coach, and the mice that become horses?"

"Wow. You do know a lot about fairytales, don't you, Sammy?" Freya looked at him with amusement, causing him to roll his eyes. "At least I do know that one. Come on." She said, walking toward the house.

Without missing a beat, Sam and Dean followed close behind, letting her lead the way. Arriving at the door, Freya didn't hesitate to ring the bell, hoping someone would open it. But seeing that no one did, Freya grabbed the handle, finding that it was already open. After sharing a look with the two brothers, the three of them walked into the house.

"Well who knows, maybe you'll find your fairy godmother?" Dean looked at his brother in amusement, causing Freya to chuckle. Sam on the other hand gave him an annoyed look.

As they began to spread out through the house, a noise caused them to draw their guns. Sharing a glance between the three, Freya signaled them to head silently to the source of the sound.

"Help. I'm in here!" A female voice called out from the kitchen.

Sam was the first to reach her, finding her handcuffed to the oven.

"Hey! Hey. It's okay. We're here, we're here. We got you." He said as he opened his lock pick kit.

"You have to help me. She's a lunatic." The young woman spoke in an alarmed voice

"What happened?" Dean looked at her in confusion.

"My step mom, she just freaked out, screamed at me, beat me. Chained me up."

"Where is she now?" Freya asked, looking around the house with her gun still in her hands.

"I don't know." She sobbed, relieved to be released from those chains.

Peering through both kitchen doors, Freya spotted a dark-haired girl on the other side of the hallway. She was just as Julie had described her.

"Guys."

Looking in the same direction, the Winchester brothers spotted her as well. But as their eyes found her, the girl turned around, walking away. Freya rushed in her direction, past the entryway and into the living room. But the girl had already disappeared. After looking around for a few seconds, Freya turned around to go back to the kitchen seeing then how the girl reappeared in front of her.

"Who are you?" Freya asked her.

The girl remained silent, flickering several times like spirits do before disappearing. Freya's eyes then travel to the rug, where she found a red apple. Dean reached her side once she took it in her hands, looking at it in frustration.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

Leaning on the hood of the Impala, Freya reviewed one of her diaries while fiddling with the red apple in her other hand. Sam and Dean talked to the paramedics that had helped the teenage girl before meeting with Freya.

"So... Little girl, shiny red apple. I'm guessing that means something to you, fairy tale boy?" Freya asked, tossing the apple to Sam.

"Yeah, actually. I think it's Snow White." He answered, looking down at the apple.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. My mother actually read that one to me as a child." Freya said, closing her diary.

"Snow White?" Dean frowned. "Ah I saw that movie. Or the porn version anyway, 'cause there was this wicked Stepmother? Woo, she was wicked." He said with a grin, causing Freya to roll her eyes.

"There is a wicked Stepmother. And she tries to kill Snow White with a poison apple." Freya said, catching the apple when Sam threw it back to her.

"But the apple doesn't actually kill the girl, right?" Dean asked, looking at her.

"No. It puts her into a deep sleep, so deep it's almost like she's dead." Sam answered.

"Almost." Freya repeated thoughtfully. "So maybe this girl isn't actually dead and that's why there are any records. Maybe she's... I don't know, in a coma?"

"That would make sense."

"So back to the hospital, right?" Dean sighed.

"Looks like it." Freya nodded, getting inside the car.

Just like that, for the third time that day Sam, Dean and Freya were at the town hospital, asking a nurse about their latest lead in the case.

"No, sorry. We don't have any comatose little girls." She answered them.

"You sure?" Sam frowned.

"Totally." She nodded as she put some papers in a file cabinet. "It's mostly old guys. And, well... Callie. She's been around since before I started here."

"Callie?"

"Yeah, it's so sad. And poor Dr. Garrison, he just... won't give up on her."

"Is Callie one of his patients?" Freya asked.

"No. His daughter." She explained.

"Do you know Callie's room number?"

"Of course." She nodded, before pointing. "It's the second door to the left, down that hall."

"Thanks." Freya smiled slightly toward the kind nurse before following the brothers to the room.

Leaning against the doorway next to Sam, Freya and both Winchester could see how Dr. Garrison was sitting in a chair reading stories to an unconscious young girl. She was a few years older than the ghost girl they had seen, but her hair was just as dark and her skin just as pale .

"The Huntsman stepped inside, and in the bed lay the Wolf. So the Huntsman took a pair of scissors and cut open the Wolf's belly."

As they shared a glance Dr. Garrison couldn't help but notice their presence. Closing the book in his hands to approached them.

"Detectives." He cleared his throat. "Can I help you?"

"We just... heard that Callie is your daughter." Dean answered.

"And we wanted to say how very sorry we are." Sam added.

Looking down for a few moments, Dr. Garrison nodded before answering them.

"Well, uh. Thank you. If you'll excuse me." He said walking past them to leave the room.

"Oh, heading this way? We'll walk with you." Dean said following his steps. "How long's Callie been like that?"

"We don't mean to intrude." Freya was quick to speak up, annoyed by Dean's lack of tact. "We can't possibly understand how hard it must be for you seeing her like this."

"It's not easy." He admitted, looking back at her. "She's, uh, been here since she was eight years old."

"That's when she was poisoned?" Sam asked as they continued walking down the hallway.

"Yes, swallowed bleach. Never figured out how she got her hands on the bottle. My wife found her, brought her to the ER. Here, and I was on call."

"You're wife was uh—? Was that Callie's stepmother?" Dean asked.

His question causes the doctor to stop walking, his eyes locked on Dean with confusion.

"Actually, yes. How'd you know that?" He frowned.

"Lucky guess." Dean shrugged.

"Well, Julie was the only mother that, uh, Callie ever knew. My wife passed away last year and, uh... it's just my daughter and me now." Dr. Garrison explained. "She's all I've got left." Sensing how his emotions were getting the best of him, the doctor turned his gaze away from them. "Uhm, excuse me. I've gotta get back to work."

"Yeah. Right."

"Well you're right. It's Snow White in spades." Freya commented as they started walking towards the exit.

"Yep. Step-mom poisons the girl, puts her into a deep sleep." Sam nodded. "What's the motive, you think?"

"Could be like Mischa Barton." Dean answered, gaining a confuse look from both of them. "Sixth Sense, not The O.C."

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Hey, you know fairy tales, I know movies."

"Oh, wait. Yeah, I remember now. She played the pasty ghost." Freya commented.

"Yeah. You know the, uh, remember the mom had that thing, you know, where you keep the kid sick so you get all the attention?"

"Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Munchausen Syndrome by proxy." Sam pointed out. "Huh, could be."

"So say all these years, Callie's been suffering silently because nobody knows the truth about what mommy dearest did." Dean said as they walked into the reception area of the hospital.

"And after all this time, her spirit just gets angrier and angrier, until it finally just starts lashing out." Freya added.

"Right." He nodded, looking back at her. "Meanwhile, she has to listen to Dad tell her these deranged stories about a rabid wolf or a cannibalistic old lady. It's enough to drive anybody nuts."

"Okay, but how are we gonna stop her?" Sam asked. "I mean Callie's stuck here. Her father's keeping her body alive."

"It does make it a bit hard to burn the bones."

"You think?" Sam raised his eyebrows.

Before Freya could say anything, the ER door opens, welcoming paramedics dragging a stretcher.

"Coming in!"

Stepping back to make room for them, Sam, Dean and Freya look at the patient on the stretcher, an elderly woman with scars all over her body and face.

"What's her status?" A doctor approached the paramedics, ready to treat the patient.

"Seventy-two year old female. Sustained multiple lacerations and puncture wounds. BP is 80/40 and falling. Sinus tachycardia."

"Is that a bite?" He asked, looking at the woman as they enter the ER room.

"Looks like she was mauled by a mad dog or maybe a wolf?"

Freya and the Winchester brothers listen to them from the reception.

"What was the last story Dr. Garrison was reading Callie?" Dean asks his brother in a hushed whisper.

"Little Red Riding Hood."

"Yes, that will do it." Freya sighed. "I'll go talk to the paramedics."

"I'll go with you." Dean said as he followed her steps to the reception desk, where the paramedicts had headed after leaving the victim with the doctors.

"Excuse me." Freya was the first to speak, showing her badge to the EMT. "Was she the only victim?"

"She was found by the side of the road, barely alive. Alone." The man answered her.

"We need to find her next of kin." Dean explained then.

Letting out a sigh the EMT looked down at the paperwork on his hands.

"She has a granddaughter." He informed them.

"Do you have an address?"

He nodded, handing a sheet of paper to her.

"Thank you." Freya said, walking away from him to reunite with Sam.

"The woman is dead." The young Winchester informed as his brother and her aproached him.

"Okay. Freya, you go find a way to stop Callie, all right?" Dean stated.

"Wait, What? What about you guys?" Freya looked at him in confusion.

"We're gonna go stop the Big Bad Wolf." Dean answered, taking the sheet of paper of her hands. "Which is the weirdest thing I've ever said."

Sam let out a sigh, sharing one last look with Freya before following his brother.

Not quite sure where to start looking for Dr. Garrison, Freya began to feel the nerves invade her body. She had done many hunts on her own before this one, but now Sam and Dean's lives depended on her managing to stop Callie herself.

She knew what the girl had been trying to do all this time by recreating the stories her father read to her. She wanted to get his attention, to make him listen to her. Children were like that, Freya was very good at understanding them thanks to the fact that she had practically raised her own little brother.

Going back over her steps, Freya searched for the doctor with her eyes. Minutes had passed and she still couldn't find him. Her nerves were growing on her at the thought of Dean and Sam being in danger.

"Dr. Garrison! I need to speak with you." She exclaimed when she found him in one of the hallways.

"Detective. What can I do for you?" He asked when she came in front of him.

"Well, uhm... it's about Callie." She said, trying to catch her breath and remain calm.

"My daughter? What about her?" He asked with confusion written all over his face.

"You know maybe, maybe could we sit down for a minute?"

"No. What about her?" He insisted, annoyed.

"Okay, well, this isn't gonna be easy. What happened to Callie was not an accident."

"Excuse me?" Dr. Garrison scoffed.

"I'm sorry, but it's true."

"You have no idea what happened to my daughter." He declared, turning angrily to walk away from Freya, but she quickly followed him.

"There are things you don't know, Doctor, about your wife."

"My wife?" He frowned, looking back at her for a quick second.

"Doctor, your wife poisoned Callie." Freya finally said.

Stopping his steps, the doctor turned back to her, clearly upset.

"Why would you say something so horrible to me?" He looked at her with pain in his eyes.

"Because I need your help."

"You stay away from me and from my daughter, you understand?" He declared, walking into his daughter's room and closing the door in Freya's face. The dirty blonde haired girl rolled her eyes before opening the door and walking into the room after him. "I'm calling Security." He threatened her, reaching for the internal phone on the wall. But Freya moved swiftly, closing the door behind her, and placing her hand over his.

"No, listen. I don't have time to do this gently. If you don't listen to me more, people are going to get hurt. Because Callie is going to hurt them." Freya tried to make him understand.

"What the hell are you talking about?!"

"You're gonna think I'm crazy, but just understand me. Your daughter, Callie, is still here. She's a spirit."

Dr. Garrison's response to her words was not what Freya expected. His eyes travelled to his daughter lying in the hospital bed, his gaze becoming sadder before he asked. "So you've seen her too?" Freya opened her mouth to respond, but she was so surprised that no sound came out of her. "I sensed her... Callie. Her presence, her scent. I even saw her standing at the foot of my bed but I never... believed it, I thought I was dreaming, I..."

"It wasn't a dream." Freya assured him. "She looks like she did when she was eight. White dress. Red ribbon in her hair. She's been trying to talk to you."

"You're not a cop are you?" Dr. Garrison asked with a sigh.

"No, I'm not."

"Then who are you?"

"That's a very long story. But all you need to know is that I'm someone who knows a little bit about this kind of thing."

"But what you said about my wife poisoning Callie, that's..."

"Callie told us." Freya explained.

"What?!"

"Not with many words, but in her own way. She told us."

"My wife loved Callie." He said, shaking his head in disbelief. "So how is – how is that possible?"

"I don't know. But it is."

"No. No I – I don't believe you."

"I don't care if you don't believe me, you need to." Freya said, shifting with desperation. "Look, Callie is killing people. She's angry. She's desperate, because nobody will listen to her. So you have to listen to her. Please, listen to your daughter."

It was the look in Freya's eyes what made Dr. Garrison to finally believe her. The tone of her voice sounded as if she was asking to be heard herself. His heart ached at the thought of his daughter possibly feeling so helpless for him to listen.

"Callie? Callie, it's Daddy." He said, looking back at Callie. Suddenly, her spirit appeared in the room, standing behind her father. "It's me, Daddy. Is it true? Mommy did that to you? I–I know I wasn't listening before, but I'm listening now. Daddy's here. Please honey, is–is there anyway that you can tell me?"

"Doctor..." Freya called him, gaining his attention and pointing behind him. Just like that, he turned around, his eyes finally meeting his daughter.

"Is it true?" He asked and she nodded in silence. "Oh, I'm so sorry, baby. But listen to me. You gotta stop what you're doing, okay? You're hurting people. I know everything now. I know the truth. It's time for you to let go. It's time for me to let you go."

Turning to look at his daughter's body, Dr. Garrison placed a kiss on her forehead. The machines monitoring her vitals began to beep, a straight line appearing on them and announcing her death. Freya's eyes filled with tears, but her heart felt at peace knowing that Callie could now rest.

Freya stayed with the doctor while Dean and Sam returned to the hospital after confirming by message that everything was over.

"And the girl's okay?" Dr. Garrison asked after hearing Dean and Sam's explanation of the recent events. Dean nodded. "So. It's really over?"

"Yeah. All thanks to you." Freya said, giving him a small smile.

"Callie was the most important thing in my life. But I should've let her go a long time ago." He admitted with a sigh. "Thank you." He looked at Freya again with fondness and then patted Sam and Dean on the shoulder before walking away.

"You know what he said? Some good advice." Dean commented as the three of them were left alone.

"Is that what you want me to do Dean? Just let you go?" Sam looked at him angrily. But when he didn't get a response from his older brother, he simply walked away.

"I don't know if you really thought I wouldn't do anything to help you when I promised you so you would let me tag along. But, Dean, I've lost too many important people in my life. I lost you once. I won't let it happen again." Freya stated before following Sam's steps.

Dean followed her with his eyes, surprised and frustrated by her stubbornness. If Sam was already difficult to convince to let him go, Freya would be a real pain in the ass. And as much as he knew her, Dean didn't know how far she was willing to go to save the people she loved and cared about.

─── ❖ ── ✦ ── ❖ ───

While Dean and Sam slept in their respective beds in the motel room they had booked, Freya was sitting on the edge of hers. In her hands the gift her father had left in her backpack, a cross necklace that had previously belonged to her mother. Tears welled in her eyes at the memory of the night Laurel Holloway had lost her life and she herself had found her dead body, surrounded by a pool of blood in the kitchen of their family house. The necklace still around her neck, reflecting the moonlight coming through the window.

The memory of her mother's death was enough to wake Freya's anger once again. A demon had taken her away from her and now they wanted to take Dean from her. But she couldn't let it happen. She couldn't let Sam lose his older brother the same way she had lost her own older brother all those years ago.

So, grabbing the Colt and car keys from Dean's bag, Freya left the motel room making as little noise as she possibly could and headed toward a crossroads.

She was well aware of the ritual necessary to make a crossroads demon appear. She had grabbed a prepared box from inside her closet before starting her trip with the Winchester brother. At first she didn't think she would need it al all, but now she was glad she had it with her. She just needed to put her ID in it and bury it in the center of the crossroads.

It wasn't long before a woman in a black dress and red eyes appeared by her side.

"Well. If it isn't little Freya Holloway. I'm touched. I mean... I've met your parents and older brother before, but you? I never had the pleasure." She said, looking her up and down.

Freya did her best not to look surprised at her words. But she was surprised. She never thought any of her relatives had ever tried to make a deal with a demon. Least of all her father, who was very insistent that she never do so. No matter what.

"What can I do for you, Freya?" The demon asked, taking her out of her thoughts.

Without a word, Freya extended her hand toward her, pointing the Colt at her.

"You can beg for your life." She then answered.

"We were having such a nice conversation. Then you had to go and ruin the mood." She said, without flinching. A smile still shining on her lips.

"If I were you, I'd drop the wisecracks and start acting scared."

"It's not my style." She replied, admiring the weapon in her hand. "That's not the original Colt. Where did you get that?" Before Freya could react to her question, the demon herself answered. "Ruby. Had to be. She is such a pain in my ass. She'll get what's coming to her... you can count on it."

The Holloway girl didn't know this Ruby, but it didn't matter in that moment either.

"That's enough. I came here to make you an offer." Freya finally said, gaining her full attention.

"You're gonna make me an offer?" She questioned in disbelief. "That's adorable."

"You can let Dean out of his deal right now. He lives, Sam lives. You live. Everyone goes home happy. Or..." Freya cocks the Colt. "You stop breathing. Permanently."

"Oh." She laughed. "All this tough talk. I have to tell you, it's not very convincing. I mean, come on Freya. Do you even want to break the deal?"

"What do you think?" Freya frowned.

"I don't know. I mean he left you." The demon said. "This is your perfect opportunity. Take his beloved car and the Colt, and go after the demon that killed your mother. Dean will go to hell in a few months, you'll just have to deal with Sam. And, come on, we both know you're a better hunter than him."

Freya clenched her fists and jaw in frustration. She knew the demon was right. This was her perfect opportunity to carry out her revenge and in turn repay Dean for the pain he'd put her through years before. But Freya wasn't like that. Loyalty was one of her greatest qualities.

"You know, I've had enough of your crap. You let Dean out of his deal right now." Freya commanded.

"Sorry, sweetheart, but your boyfriend's an adult. He made that deal of his own free will, fair and square. It's iron clad."

"Every deal can be broken."

"Not this one."

"Fine." She accepted. "Then I'll kill you. If you're gone, so's the deal."

"Guess again." The demon laughed.

"What?" Freya frowned.

"Freya, I'm just a saleswoman. I got a boss like everybody. He holds the contract, not me. He wants Dean's soul, bad. And believe me. He's not going to let it go."

"You're bluffing."

"Am I? Shoot me, if it'll get you off. But the deal still holds, and when Dean's time is up, he's getting dragged into the pit." She assured.

"Then who's your boss? Who holds the contract?"

"He's not as cuddly as me, I can tell you that."

"Who is it?" Freya insisted, tired of the lack of an answer to her question.

"I can't tell you. I'm sorry, Freya. But there's no way outta this one. Not this time." She stated. "Unless, of course..."

"Unless, what?" A glimmer of hope flashed in Freya's eyes.

"Unless you give him your brother."

"I'm not gonna give you Peter." Freya scoffed.

"I'm not talking about Peter."

"You want Carter? Don't you think you've done enough to him already?"

"Why do you care so much, Freya? He killed your mother."

"No. He was possessed. A demon killed my mother." Freya stated. "Besides, I don't even know where Carter is."

"That's a shame." The demon said with a sigh. "You should really talk to your father, sweetie. I'm sure he knows exactly where he is."

Freya was getting tired of the sound of her voice. And knowing that now their conversation and her plan were going nowhere, she finally pulled the trigger. A bullet slipped between the demon's eyes, killing her in an instant.

Keep Reading: Chapter 4

Tag List: @deans-spinster-witch @lmhf1

If you'd like to be tagged, drop me a comment

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imlivinginyourtrashcan · 10 months

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Hi hello im a dirty American heres some friendsgiving headcannons for the sp character

Cartman:

That man aint bringing shit

Only there for the food

The type of mf to steal ingrediants while youre cooking something

Dives RIGHT for the pumpkin pie

Nobody is happy

He denies it but its do obvious hes stealing shit 🤬

Does not wait for a toast

Bro just dives in

Getting seconds, thirds, fourths

When hes done theres no left overs

If he were to bring something id be pie

His moms recipe

BUT THIS LITTLE FUCK EATS IT IN THE CAR

Kyle:

Sometimes hosts the friendsgiving at his house

Brings the sparkling grape juice/apple juice

And also the Kosher things

Only has one helping, tries to get leftovers for the family or for kenny

Helps his mom cook when hes hosting

Setting the table always

Tries to toast but ends up yelling at Cartman for eating before hes done

Helps Ike pack for those little kindergarten thanksgivings?

Yknow when you dressed as a pilgrim and ate food?

Was I the only one who did that??

Stan:

He panicks and brings what he can find

"Hey dude! What you bring?"

"Uhhh... leftover mash potatos?"

Hes TRYING

Downing the sparkling juices like no tomorrow

The eggnog too

Cartman encourages it

"CHUG CHUG CHUG"

Watching the football game

RESTRAINS himself when it comes to food

Like, he wants it but knows Kyles gonna be pissed

Plays catch with everyone else

Or pingpong

Doesnt give a fuck about the Macys parade

Kenny:

Brings canned stuff he got from the food drive

Like cranberry sauce

Sneaking leftovers for his family

Plays catch with the boys

Died from a football lodged in his eye

Oh and from the

"Macys parade"

Incident

You dont want to know

Butters:

Brings the sweet potatos

Suggest christmas music/movies be played

Cartman called him gay immediately

So that got shut down

Brings the extra pies and everything since Cartman eats his

Lover of cranberry sauce and other things most people hate on thanksgiving

"Oh that was good! Could I have more please?"

"Butters what the fuck who likes CRANBERRY SAUCE???"

"I do!"

Doer of the toast

Often gets hit in the face when they play catch and cries

Can't stay for long cuz his parents are strict but hes there on video call rest of the time

Craig:

The type of mf when you ask what he brought he says

"My presence"

MF-

No!!!

You need to bring FOOD

They have to kick him out

He comes back with bread rolls or crackers, cheese and olives

So hes aloud back in

Doesnt care abt the parades or catch or anything

Just kinda there for Tweek

If someone asks him to do sonething he'll do it though

Hes limited by meals thanks to his braces

He doesnt care

Thats future craigs problem

Flips someone off if they beat him in a sport

Or flips off the tv when someone does something stupid in football

Has restraint when it comes to food

Bro will just wait

Wait

And then devour his plate in seconds

Tweek:

Brings homemade cider or pumpkin spice

Panicked the whole time

Hiding upstairs half the time

At least until food

He looks like a sopping wet cat

Doesnt really eat that much

Convinced the food is poison

Dont try to reassure him either he doesnt trust you

Has to check a million times though

"Is this poison???"

"No???"

"GAHH!! I dont believe you!!"

Leaves after feasting

He can only handle so much

Arrives super late too which is ironic

Jimmy:

Brings the food over and makes a puns

Like puts devil horns on eggs

"Jimmy what is that?"

"D-d-d-deviled Eggs"

Bro is telling thanksgiving jokes every second

Does the toast some years

Its like a stand up comedy routine tho

He lets you eat during that

Sneaking food

Mischievous little bastard

Puts on family fued when he realizes the boys are too pissed at football

Also has brace limits

But does he follow them ever? Nope

Drinks sparkling juice from a wine glass

Able to keep the party going for a WHILE he has ENERGY

Card playing KING

Winning at Crazy 8s left and RRRRIGHTTTTTT

Clyde:

Brought mac and cheese

Either that or bread

Food sneaker

Thinks hes good at sports

Hes not

He gets hit in the face so often

And cries

Tried Tweeks coffee

Started coughing and gagging immediately

Hes a picky eater im calling it now

Like will not eat if he doesnt think he'll like it

Me too Clyde i get it

Likes the Macys parade

Fucking weirdass

Arrives a bit before Tweek but is still late

The mf to get seconds

Wont eat before the event either

Saving his stomach for yum yums

Tolkien:

Also hosts

Helps his parents with food

Makes the dinner table look like a whole buffet

When hes not hosting he brings stuffing or some expensive good food

Or like

Homemade dip?

Casserole?

Idk

Seems like itd change every year

Great at sports

Helps clean up too

Toasts sometimes

Very generic toast

Doesnt seem like someone who has much to say

#south park #southpark butters #southpark #sp butters #sp tweek #sp craig #sp headcannons #tolkien black #tolkien #south park tweek #craig x tweek #tweek tweak #craig tucker #kyle brovlofski #eric cartman #stan marsh #thanksgiving

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thedisablednaturalist · 4 months

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Just being around my family stresses me out. Which in turn causes my pain levels to rise. Everyone is so nasty to each other. I can't ask for help without being ridiculed so I just have to fight through the pain to make my dinner. And then I have to flee to my room or risk being chastised for the unhealthiness of whatever I manage to make before falling over. I just needed to eat a safe food that was quick, filling, and didn't trigger my nausea. But because box mac and cheese will make me fat my mom has to tear me apart over it. Also I only ate 1.5 meals today because my mom gets mad when I'm in the kitchen.

And the bathrooms? My brother spends 20 minutes taking a sink bath every half hour in the bathroom across from my room, so I have to use my parents bathroom if I don't get to it in time. I try to pee quickly but I have to pee frequently due to fibromyalgia bladder. My mom yells at me for using "her" bathroom. "Go downstairs!" she yells. Why can't my able-bodied brother go downstairs to take his sink baths then?? why do I have to painfully crawl down the stairs every time I want to take a piss?? Also he does this in the middle of the night too which wakes me up. Don't get me started on him filling the toilet with shit and not flushing so the smell wafts into my room 🤢

Oh and god forbid I have to take my weekly shower. Then EVERYONE is mad at me for "hogging the bathroom". I only shower once or twice a week due to pain and both my brothers literally showering twice a day (thus no hot water, it's impossible to take a cold shower with fibro). I have to fight to get a timeslot. And then my mom makes fun of me for looking "unkempt".

But according to everyone IM the bully, IM overreacting. My mom "almost died to birth me" so her behavior gets excused. My one brother has severe autism/OCD and my parents dont do anything to help or manage it so his needs are always above mine since I'm able to "push past it" (re: forced). Fun fact the "witch doctor" my parents took my brother to cut off my brothers meds cold turkey this week so its all been 200x worse due to withdrawal (who the fuck cuts someone off of WELLBUTRIN AND ZOLOFT cold turkey????).

I keep telling myself its only a few more weeks but I still haven't heard back about my housing application being approved and I'm getting worried.

How am I supposed to live, let alone work, in this environment?

#and theres not much my DARS counselor can do to make my work situation better #like she'll give me advice assuming my parents are reasonable people #ill tell her about problems and she'll basically accuse me of overreacting #no it is literally that bad. like I'm not joking #i dont know what is up with my other brother i think he has anger issues or hes jealous of all the attention the first brother gets??#they fucking hate eachother #wrenfea.vent #i told my parents it was fucking stupid to take my brother off his meds like that #but they all believe the doctor knows what shes doing

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helly-watermelonsmellinfellon · 1 year

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I need y'all to pray hard.

I used the stove yesterday around 5 PM. I used it to make dinner. Bethy and Dave were at the races cuz someone they knew paid for them to go. It was just mom and I and we were too hot to want something that took too long. The stove was fine.

They got back at 11:12 PM. Dave whined about being hungry. He stayed up for 2 additional hours and it was annoying af.

We had leftover lasagna AND pork roast. Plus, all sorts of quick things to make. He made a big fuss about having to cook himself dinner. Bethy went to sleep immediately. She never ate. She also hasn't used the stove before.

Mom and I were forced to be awake cuz he's loud as fuck and we can't close the bedroom door cuz the house is too hot, and we need air flow. However, if we put a fan in the window, the humidity makes everything wet, and mom nearly broke her neck when she stepped out of the room and slid on the wet floor. It was so bad that her phone almost died because it claimed there was moisture inside when it had been under her leg on the bed all day.

While Dave cooked whatever he was cooking, we heard something break. For a moment I thought it was the YouTube video I was watching, but then mom sat up straight and went, "He broke something."

But there was no crash. We have many breakable cups and plates, but the breaking sound didn't involve a crash or the sprinkling of shards as they scatter from the point of impact. So, I wasn't actually sure if something broke.

He then made pancakes this morning. For himself. Another way to whine and be a dick.

Anyway, he and Bethy had to go and get more of our stuff from his boss's garage, so I decided to make mom and I lunch. And that's when I saw it.

The break.

The crack.

[It's hard to see but the crack starts from the very bottom of the center of the stove and travels over and up the left side. It ends halfway up the back burner.]

Dave managed to break the tempered glass surface of the stove. My guess it he dropped the metal pot we use for making homemade candy on it, since he uses that for mac n cheese and there's mac n cheese in the fridge right now.

That stove belongs to the landlady, and he's been whining about how she will do surprise inspections.

So, pray that she decides she doesn't want to do any inspections any time soon, cuz having her stove broken within 3 weeks of a new family renting her spare home, is very bad.

#stuff #dave WILL be the one paying for it tho

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violetsmokes · 2 years

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LMK AU ~ TJTTW Part 2

Wow okay, so some of you actually like my au idea so here I think I'll go over how exactly Macaque becomes the Monkey Queen, immortal, and a different punishment instead of everyone getting a mountain thrown on them. Comment, leave some questions or suggestions <3

First things first Macaque is just as immortal as Wukong, it's why during his fight with Wukong he doesn't die. Macaque ate the peach, drunk the wine, and took the pill. He fought heaven and they tired the same punishments to kill him, no luck but someone did get their hand bit and spent the rest of the day wondering if they got magical money rabies. The smirk Mac had didn't help. Wukong didn't get trapped under a mountain for 500 years, no Buddha decided to use a different punishment for the to monkeys that seem to be attached at the hip. "The hero and warrior were like the Sun and Moon." Buddha trapped Wukong in the Sun and Macaque in the Moon. Wukong could only walk the Earth in the day while Macaque could only walk in the night this kept the two separated for 500 years untill Wukong would leave for the Journey of the West. Side note getting trapped in the Sun and Moon had a few unforseen consequences, such as our monkeys gaining powers usually connect to the Sun and Moon. Powers such as the ability to control fire and water along with healing abilities, they can now control Sun and Moon when either one loses control of his emotions. Yes this is why Buddha will not fight them again. He didn't realize the punishment would somehow make two already overpowered monkeys even more OP and is afraid that fighting them again would tear the universe to shreds. No he will never let the monkeys know this mainly because his think Wukong would tear the universe apart for fun and Mac keeps no secrets from his mate. Buddha doesn't know how to tell the Jade Emperor that if the monkeys go crazy again then there is nothing anyone can do to stop them. He is 68% sure the Jade Emperor already know tho.

So that how we get two OP immortal monkeys but how does Macaque become Monkey Queen because currently his is still know as the King's Warrior. Well when Wukong leaves for the TJTTW Macaque for the first time ever doesn't go with him and stays to guard Flower Fruit Mountain and to care for the monkeys. Well a troublesome Baboon King hears about a beautiful mountain with rich fruit and water and many other resources. He hears how the king of this mountain had left for long journey leaving his beautiful mate and their hoard of monkeys without a leader. The Baboon King gathers his army and heads straight for Flower Fruit Mountain when they arrive he sent and small group of baboons to attack any near by monkeys. This quickly gains Macaque's attention and he confronts the Baboon King who tells Macaque to surrender and be his mate or the baboons will enslave the monkey army and kill the cubs. Macaque is given one day to make his choice and being the warrior his is chooses to fight for the only home and family he's ever known. This leads to years and years of a bloody and vicious war but also this is when Macaque makes an alliance with the Spider Queen and the Scorpion Queen trading food and gems for venom, weds, and a few illusion spells. Meanwhile the Baboon King was growing crazier by the day, especially when his general and number one supporter died is battle. A battle that took a heavy hit on the baboons, many missed home and were growing desperate and defeated. The new general just want this war to end and was ready to surrender. This general and many of the other baboons were losing respect in their tyrannical King. Finally the war came to an end when Macaque lead a small group immoral monkeys to ambush the baboons camp leaving them open to a large attack from the rest of the monkey army and hopefully driving the baboons off Flower Fruit Mountain for good. The attack went as planned until the final battle between Macaque and the Baboon King, the Baboon King was losing and noticed his general had managed to sneak up behind Macaque and yelled for the general to strike Macaque but as Macaque turn to defend against an attack the Baboon General dropped his weapons and raised his hands is surrender begging Macaque to let the remaining baboons leave the mountain. This gained the attention of every monkey and baboon as they paused to see what was happening between the leaders. The Baboon General's surrender angered the King and in a manic cry threatened to kill the general and any baboons that didn't fight. With that the baboons turned on their King dropping their weapons and bowing before Macaque, the general knelt down and loudly proclaimed Macaque as the Monkey Queen followed by the monkeys bowing with the baboons and everyone chanting for their new Monkey Queen as he read out the former Baboon King's crimes and landed the killing blow. From here the baboons and monkeys joined forces and lead by their new Queen built a strong kingdom on top of Flower Fruit Mountain.

One last bit before I end of this post with some songs. After the war and rebuilding a kingdom Macaque misses Wukong and is worried about his mate. He had been gone for so long and they hadn't heard anything. The monkeys were both hurt and angry, they loved their Monkey King but felt betrayed that he was always leaving the mountain and causing trouble. It didn't help that during the long war Wukong had not been seen or heard from at all. When Macaque announces that is leaving to find Wukong his monkey generals try to convince him to stay and opened up about how they should forget about the Monkey King for betraying them. Macaque sees through the anger and finds their pain in being left behind and their fear that if Macaque leaves then he will never return. Macaque reminds everyone that Flower Fruit Mountain is his home and as long as he is Queen Wukong is King and that he will bring Wukong back for good. Everyone respects their Queen and knows to trust his words. Macaque leaves unaware of the mess Wukong has gotten himself into and the Journey East he will soon face.

WOW MY GOD THIS WAS A LOT! And I have so much more! How Wukong and Macaque met, the actual journey to the east, does MK or Bai He play any roll, Mayor is still a fucking gremlin, Macaque and Tripitaka become friends and respect eachother!?!?!??!??! But as promised some songs that go along with the AU one in way or another.

youtube

This just matches with the punishment between Wukong and Macaque and how the only time then could see eachother was when the Sun and Moon shared the same sky.

youtube

Remember the small ambush on the baboon camp well Macaque gives a similar speech to his troop like Odysseus. But I guess the last bit of the song could be considered foreshadowing. For what? That is for another post, but incase anyone wants to know what Macaque fights for its for his King and their home.

youtube

For this one its mainly at the end of the song, 3:06 onward, were Odysseus confronts the cyclops. Yes Macaque gives Baboon King the same speech before kill the lunatic.

Part one https://at.tumblr.com/violetsmokes/thank-you-sasunaru22fy-and-everyone-who-got-me-to/uuaxds90kupm

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risetherivermoon · 1 year

Text

i like ranting about my own works, so have a bunch of little details about the universe of how to not die young, basically just some small little canon things i like (some may be written & some i might not get to adding,) (psa, some are silly & happy and some are very much not,) (another psa, there is no major spoilers in these,)

middle school James had a baby mustache that he insisted he'd grow out but he eventually shaved it off because he hated the sensory of it

Sirius and Mary used to date, but they split up when they both realized how gay they are (now theyre just very good friends)

Lily and Remus met because Lily used to be the librarian's assistant and he kept hiding in there, (he also had a shit ton of overdue books)

Remus' mom has a degree in english literature, but right now she works for tech support at an old person's home

Remus has never gone trick or treating

Regulus was a biter as a child, Sirius has a scar to prove it

Marlene tries really hard to impress Dorcas but fucks it up everytime by either tripping over her own feet or saying the wrong thing, (Dorcas thinks its cute)

Barty has eaten a bar of soap before

Evan knows Monty because he works as the secretary at his doctors office,

Barty has never met any of his grandparents because his parents never bothered introducing him,

Remus can handle any other kind of 'after fight reactions' besides the silent treatment/being ignored, it makes him severely anxious (*cough* trauma *cough*)

Barty has never watched spongebob,

alternatively, Evan was a spongebob lover as a child

Pandora once tried to see how many crayons she could stick up Evan's nose while he was sleeping, he didn't wake for like twenty minutes, the answer is 17

James absolutely loves children

Dorcas and Barty have spa nights

Regulus is observant as fuck, and knows things before people tells him all the time, it freaks people out

Regulus steals things from Sirius constantly because it's funny,

Barty almost died as a kid because he choked on a coin (he was 13)

Remus is a shit chef, he only knows boxed mac and cheese and ramen

Sirius fucking loves baking,

all of the marauders signed Sirius' arm cast with their nicknames,

James has dyslexia

and Remus has dyscalculia (hes me fr)

Remus is very expressive, like you always know what he's thinking,

Regulus burned one of his bras in a trash can after Sirius let him smoke one time

Peter ate an entire block of cheese on a dare

Mary practices her makeup on Peter

Sybil does palm readings for Peter, he's a very supportive bf

Remus bites Sirius a lot

Marlene punched a teacher in the face on accident before,

Minnie & Poppy are married <3

Barty only has Remus' number to send him the most atrocious takes he has at like three in the morning - Remus leaves him on read frequently

Sybil and Pandora are fairly good friends

Pandora and Evan had a Wii U as kids and Evan was the fucking best at Wii bowling, you have no idea, (he has his own technique, he calls it 'the Evan Method')

Pandora likes eating pomegranates and then going up to Evan and smiling at him with red stained teeth, he screams like a little girl everytime

James has always wanted a little sibling

James' parents don't know he has anxiety problems because he just stuffs it down so much

Sirius eats dandelions, for some fucking reason, he's just weird

Regulus used to have dinner alone some nights because he'd skip dinner with the family to avoid the constant loudness and bickering, sometimes he'd make something for himself, sometimes Kreacher would make something for him and sit with him

Regulus tells Sirius whenever his boobs hurt because it makes Sirius gag

James and Remus are the ultimate people pleasers

anyways, thats all, maybe ill make more, i have sm brainrot for this fic, theyre all my children

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alollinglaughingcat · 1 year

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i have so many kittens rn its silly so i made a gallery of some (some!) of my cats' ages XD

Frito is a bottlefed kitten I just picked up today, alongside their three siblings, Cheeto, Dorito, and Lay. They're 3 weeks old

Maya is a stray kitten my mom found outside three days ago, and she's a bit older than a month old, around 5-6 weeks old

Checkers is my long-term foster kitten, whom I've had since she was 2 months old, and she's now 8 months old about. I also fostered her sister, California, for a month. Checkers had a bad reaction to fluids (or the needle was contaminated) that caused her skin to split open, and she's got a few months left of healing to go!

Mac n Cheese is my wobbly syndrome cat, whom I've had since she was 6 weeks old and I swore was still under a year but she's actually a month over at 1 year, 1 month! :O time flies!!! my baby's so fat now!

Gizmo, not pictured, is another cat I have, who's about 2 years and a half now. Very smart and knows sit, high five, and spin! :) My mom also found him as a stray, same age as Maya, and he gave all my cats (and me) ringworm lmao

Princington and Battle Axel were two cats I also had who are now deceased and they were the same age, only about a week apart, and would both be 3 and a half years by now (Prince died at 1 year, Axel at ~2)

Tweetie aka Sweetie aka Angel is a cat I've had since childhood, so I can't remember her exact age. She was born on my grandma's farm, and we took her and Tommy aka Mustard (now deceased) when they were weaned off their mom, so about the 5-6 week mark

Sheldon is another cat I have, big fatto, and my mom fostered him since he was a bottle baby and kept him because he had anger issues and she feared no one would take him and he'd get euth'ed. He's about 9-11 years, I'm not sure of when he came into the picture even though I remember him as a kitten

Shadow is our old boy, somewhere in the 14-16 year old range. His ears are all fucked cause he got something like a hematoma in them and blood burst. He's a good boy but hell at the vet, so since the ears aren't lethal/painful, we didn't do much past give him meds for infection and clean his ears. He has a sister named Macaroni who is very chill and does not look as old as Shadow does lol

Also had a cat named Princess and another named Misty before them, but only faded memories :)

I had hamsters (Digger, Gumball) and guinea pigs (Marvin, Sweetflower) previously as well, had a rabbit (Cookie Dough aka NumNum) briefly, and currently have one some-months old hamster named Buster who loves biting people, and two gerbils, Gemini aged 1 year and Mama Virgo a few months older. Gemini had a sister named Libra that previously mentioned California ate. My mom also has ducks, chickens, and guineas

and not to mention our dogs! Shaggy is like a 4 months old sheep-a-doodle, then Adrian the mini pom is like 10 years old, Rocky the Shih Tzu is 12-14 years old, and Sonny the mutt is pushing 19 years old! We previously had a pom named Destiny who died at like 15 and PP aka Penelope the German Shephard mix who died young at 10 years old because of arthritis/other conditions

its going to be so strange going from so many animals to 2-3 cats, 3 critters when i move for college lol

#random #cats #kittens #kitties #foster kittens #wobbly cat syndrome #old cats #cat ages

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wordpimp · 10 months

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We live in a world of calm and speculation.

Rainstorm gesthemane, hialeah watertown.

Be good to me daddy, he says.

I will baby, she says.

They argued a little earlier abt what to call things. They stepped into a mud hole, she carried him across a mud puddle. A turtle floated them across its back. It was flat. Lounge lizards in tucson, in tulsa, in poughkeepsie.

It was hot in july in the trailer. White broadside yellow cream trim, it was pretty in a way. Petticoat, baby wore mary janes to match, white socks farmer tan. Yellow wig. Ginger blossom. He had a few tattoos, but really only liked one of them. It was a bird, a kanji, the owl.

梟

Baby went to japan once, mt fuji, and asked for sake like a tourist. For a long time they thought abt him, there, in the wind.

Around evening, baby would want ice cream from the ice cream truck. Parlor junction. Mi casa es su casa, the driver used to say. But baby misinterpreted the one time he went down there: mikasa.

It was a brand of dinnerware but they already had some. Casa with a K. They did that a lot. Sign of puberty. The world was young, then. Flags were rectangular, money was printed on clothes. Put a dollar in me, the walls whined at night. Labor of love.

Signs in the chimney. When they were able to, they would have a fire again. Saturday maybe. The days were gone, mixed up since daddy had begun to work again. Out in the yard, in the cinder, baby could hear the pitchfork shovel of machinery. He smiled at his typewriter. It was fitting.

A bug flew in from somewhere, green-yellow, yellow-green, there must have been a window left open. It looked like a crayon. Stick of wax, eyes, cardboardy paper, birch bark. O the skin of my love.

Baby lit a cigarette on the stove, waiting to flick the ash, started boiling some water for mac n cheese. Mac in cheese. Macaroni and cheese. It was italian. Starving, he noticed. Ice cream for dessert, maybe tonight.

He wondered abt daddy, what she would do when she came in, what would she say, what new saying, what did she see out there. Or maybe a souvenir today, taking her time to dig up the bottles and ingots she got paid to hand over. Sometimes she would bring one of those back. A small gem, it might go into a scepter or a walnut, it might make a tree in the country, a beautiful place from a story.

Tire swing. That sounded too beautiful to baby. He hardly noticed the light swelling on his arm, where the crayon had landed, and the kettle boiling, or the white hot flowers. Bloom of midday he needed a nap.

Baby had the most extended childhood of anyone. He was born in a manger, he died on the cross. He was wet he was hard. He couldn't cum, then he couldn't stop.

That he wasn't a cult leader, that he wasn't a shepherd, with a flock to watch over or admonish, that he didn't abandon them all to go sit in judgment of everyone he ever met or heard of, that was a minor miracle. It made sense if you heard of easter, running out in bare feet with diapers, eating all that candy. Chocolate bunny marshmallow bird, give me the stomach to jesus. Baby jesus, jesu of man's desiring. If you ate all that candy, you would never want that responsibility.

Instead baby was a loud quiet person. Chaotic quiet, perturbed by everything. Lately he had been frustrated by the wallpaper, by the color of time, orange like the sun blue like the water green like the pears or unripe apples. Ripe pears unripe apples. Confusing. Some of the wallpaper was peeling but it was almost peaceful that way. Maybe it wouldn't burn all at once, if that was its destiny. It was a taste of freedom, for baby. Like coming out of a cupboard, a box cutter to skin. Letting the hunger abate.

Baby liked to sleep in a small bed. I think it's closest to the true meaning of his character.

Daddy shut and locked the front door behind her when she went to work outside. The back door stayed locked. It wasn't to keep baby in, it was to keep the lunatics out. She was going to ride her tractor for a little bit, and dig a little bit. Who knows. Metals in the earth. She had heard that there was a meteorite under the sand. It had brought up ghosts. It was actually what people had come to see. Why they lived there.

Daddy never saw the ghosts anymore, but jehovahs and mormons, scientologists, they would sometimes come by and that was bad for baby. He would talk to anyone, he just couldn't help it.

Daddy was more circumspect. She talked to strangers and people that she knew casually but said very little. Hi dolores hi bill, hi stephen. Their house was at the end of the street. A few neighbors, the creek. Mulberry tree, sideyard with a big hole from digging. They had been thoughtful and made the quarry wide enough to corkscrew down a few more turns. She hoped they wouldn't have to move for another year or two, it was a nice setup.

Daddy's schedule to get the ice cream was posted on the fridge. Left side mwf, right side, the rest of the week. Daddy made it, really worked hard on it. Pews in a church. Wings pearl grey. Everything was pearly. Cum colored or pink. Raw and toothy. It was the inside of a mouth. Of a cunt. Daddy shaved her leg. This is the one, lick it.

Tonight, daddy would go get ice cream for them, or eat the cake while the truck went down there for her. It stopped at the hill, not a long walk. Laundromat, axila, underarms. Excitement. Daddy liked to walk. It's the ether, she said. She never went to mt fuji either.

Daddy thought abt buying a general motors car, an olds cutlass supreme, gliding smoothly over rough asphalt. It's what you think abt while you shave, while you fuck. Nice, smooth. Blue midnight metallic half vinyl top. That's the kind of car they would drive.

They rode sidesaddle. Half beard in the mirror, there are pirates who invented transgenderism. Walk the plank. Is that also the abyss? Or a kind of it, a version. For reasons they only knew, this was never consummated.

Where do we live daddy. Is it a trailer? Is it a house. Is it a cabin?

It's a mansion. Big enough for you little bird.

It really was big enough, no matter what they called it.

Daddy stopped in the mirror. She was a bit run down from the summer. The gel of her eyes was blue or brown or aqua, ça dépendait, when the sun hit. She didn't wear pants or shoes. Inside, she didn't wear much of anything. Baggy shirt. Why hide all this, she thought, and so she didn't hide it.

Pudor is for the dirt, the shirt said, in yellowing cotton.

Daddy liked to sleep under covers. The bed was warmer for her. Nude and warm and redolent. Patchwork lace embroidered, panels in a tapestry. She felt like penelope.

One time daddy saw a diagram of a medieval church, all the parts like a body on a map, a table of divine making. But not anymore, they were done with operations. Trepan my brain, amputate my ear, excise, cut me, dig. It was already there. It was science.

Ash on a mantle. Face in a polaroid. There is one of daddy and baby pinned to the closet.

Baby said they lived on a cliff. It was curious to listen to him talk. He talked in his sleep too. Cliff, diving board. Daddy liked to hear him talk, she knew he could see something and sometimes she could see it too. Rolling down the street in a dream, jumping off a building. Play in that water. She felt good in the mornings when she could talk to him about what he dreamt, what he was seeing. It got her excited.

Meanwhile baby slept and talked in his sleep. Jackdaw emu...

She could tell he was dreaming abt birds again.

Daddy.

Yes baby.

Remember that movie abt the birds? You know the weird one I told you abt? I dreamt abt that again last night. But now there's a garden. And children. Well, two. I think they're us. I think they're us before, and maybe again. And it's very sad and very strange but also very healing. It's like when you come back from your work and tell me abt the outside. It's like when you tell me what to do.

Like I know you can't stay. I know this is all ending. It's the end already, but I can't help it. It's all I dream abt now.

Baby it's never enough but it always has to be enough. Why don't you come sit with me. Let me hold you.

I want to come back here. I want to grow up and get big and strong and ready. I want to lift you on my shoulders and fly with you, and throw you in the water. You'll see, then I'll dive with you. We'll swim. Will you wait for me, until I can do it. Will you watch me?

She could never say no to him, not like that.

When baby was finished talking he put the blanket on daddy and started a fire in the fireplace.

The flames did a slow dance, like salome. He saw a headless snake, ankles and rigging, the stubborn wind. It was the edge of the world. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep but he dreamt of the morning when they'd both be naked and wet.

#prose

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