#// like him having a genuine friend outside of his sister would kinda just mean so much and be v big imo

[armafidelium]

something i look forward to hopefully exploring in his phel's canon verse is him gaining trust in others and kinda just . . . learning to be a person outside of his duty. we'll see how long that kinda stuff takes but i enjoy exploration like that

[sweetnans]

Stuck in the moment || Bakugo, K. (pt.6)

Pairing: fuckboy Bakugo/hopelessly romantic fem. reader

summary: You made a mistake, a huge mistake. You fucked the most cocky, annoying, bastard, fuckboy you knew. Bakugo Katsuki. And that fact was against all your beliefs. Now, after the rumor (truth) spread like a pandemic virus in college you'll have to live with the stormy consequences of your acts and whatever trash was brought with it.

a/c: Hey, it's me again. Here we are in a new series I plan to continue. I really hope you enjoy it. I put my favorite man in action (bakugo) being a selfish bastard that you would love eventually and I couldn't help to put another "trope" I'm a sucker for (guardian/father figure Aizawa) I'm so sorry if that bothers you. Once again, I'm sorry if I misspelled something, English is not my first language. (Not proofread yet)

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5 -> Pt.7 ♡

m.list

Bakugo was kinda fun to be around with. He actually made you laugh and not because of his faces every time you blurted the most unhinged question for him. He made you laugh verbally, with his own words, and the sentence wasn't one full of hate and despise. He was, without wanting it, fun.

For you, it fell like a truce, and the thought of being friends with him didn't scare you anymore. The second thoughts and plans of getting rid of him just by ignoring him disappeared along with the security that he was going to try something with you. He didn't.

You felt lightweight. Like a feather being carried with the breeze. Or that was Denki told you when you tried to verbalize what you felt. There was no weight on your shoulders anymore trying to dodge every bullet Bakugo threw at you just by being himself. You were walking on eggshells, and now it felt amazing that you weren't feeling distraught by just thinking of bumping into him in the hallways.

Somehow, that relieved your anxiety of having an upcoming date with Todoroki. You were planning on what to wear very calmly with Jirou's help and fantasizing how it would be.

You've made your peace.

Back in your real life, outside the mess of your head, you had to complete your homework and study for midterms. So you were genuinely happy that you could accomplish that without feeling so rachet about yourself.

"Is college more difficult than school?" Eri asked while you two were both doing your school/college chores in Aizawa's apartment.

"I don't know. I think you have to find a steady pace and find a good method to study, and everything should be fine. " You hummed your response, and she squinted at you. "What?"

"But you're like a genius, that doesn't count"

Eri had entered the age where she hated school. The rebellious phase for every teenager. She was still a cute girl who didn't give Aizawa any problem, but that didn't mean that it was easy trying to get her to do her homework.

"Well, you have brains too," you shrugged. "I know you don't like to do this stuff but at least we can spend some time together, like old times"

You loved her with your entire soul, and she welcomed you with open arms when Aizawa introduced you two. You both treated each other like sisters.

"Yeah, I think you're right." She smiled and directed her eyes to her assigment. "You've been kinda missing lately"

"It's been messy, not going to lie about it," you continued your writing while she was fidgeting with her pen.

"A boy, right?" She raised her eyebrow and smirked.

"What?" You dropped your pencil and looked at her nervously. You knew that Eri was very prone to hearing things without meaning it, and that was because Aizawa and Hizashi usually forgot that she's around when they speak things about college.

"I heard Aizawa talking to...I can't remember actually who, but he said something about a guy named Bakugo. I think I remember him, a loudly blonde guy with a grumpy face"

The thing about you two is that you always shared secrets. She constantly overheard things and never stuttered on telling or asking you whatever the topic was.

You constantly forgot how she was there before you. Like you were the older and you acted like an older sister for her but it was really weird that she, when she was little, used to be around them most of the time. You knew the war provoked that the grown-ups had to take their time to fix the world, so they asked students to babysit her. Mirio, one of the oldest, always stayed around. Even now, he made sure to have time to take her out. They went to amusement parks together, to the movies, to the arcade. Mirio had a busy life as a hero but never forgot his roots.

"Uhm, I don't know exactly what you heard, but it's just a friendship, nothing romantic, I swear." You were afraid that she had heard something about the one night stand you had with him, but you knew that even if Aizawa was oblivious about Eri eavesdropping, he would never share that piece of information with anyone.

"I don't mind. Your last boyfriend was a jackass so the set bar is pretty low." She said, waving her hand mindlessly.

With the teen years and rebellious age, as you can tell, she became savage.

"Accurately rude," you stated. "Anyways, just so you know and because I love you, I'm having a date this friday with the son of Endeavor"

The way she looked at you like you were joking made you cackle. You nodded, reaffirming your sentence, and she denied not believing you.

"The guy with the mismatched eyes?" You moved your head up and down, and she put both of her hands in her mouth. "He is cute"

"I know!" You giggled while she quickly closed her books.

"I need to know everything"

Aizawa scolded both of you for not finishing your chores before dinner but it was totally worth it.

...

On the other hand, Bakugo was still reminiscing the moment you appeared in his room the day before. His bento, clean and empty, was forgotten in his desk while he could still pictured you spinning in his chair.

The moment he watched you disappear, running after Todoroki was a decisive point in his mind. He only knew two emotions when it came to you, utterly giddy feelings that he didn't know he had, and that made him feel in constant denial and the second one, rage. Those feelings evolved in things more complicated. Rage evolved in stubbornness, prideful and insecurity. Why wasn't he good enough?

But then, you turned the things in your favor again, and he felt, aside from happy, vulnerable. Was that the only thing it took to have him back? A few 'I'm sorry' and a bag of cookies? If it was anyone, he would close the door at their nose, but it was you, and he couldn't help feeling the sincerity in your actions.

"What do you think about her?" Bakugo asked Denki, who was very busy trying to win a race in Mario Kart against Sero.

They were hanging in his room. After all, it was the only place available for stuff them all without annoying anyone. Sero and Denki were challenging themselves on Mario Kart, Kirishima was reading a sports magazine, and Mina was painting her nails.

"She is my best friend. I mean, aside from Jirou, " he answered, calculating a drift and avoiding a banana peel.

"Isn't she your girlfriend?" Sero chimed in, stumbling in the banana peel that Denki avoided before. "Oh man," he whined, seeing how toad twirled many times.

Mina started talking about you, how you seemed very nice but a little shy and how she was pretending to invite you for a drink or five. Bakugo's friend knew how he was, so he didn't mind asking about you with all of them there.

"Yep, but she's also my best friend. Anyway, forget about Jirou. " he turned the conversation about you again. "She's a very good friend, loyal. She's very attached to her past, but I don't blame her. She stays in between Jirou and me, like she's goofy funny and likes to throw silly jokes, but unlike me, she can ground herself very quickly, she doesn't need a Jirou to stay put. She's always supportive, and I'm really happy to have her"

Denki meant every word he said. He was very fond of you because you were so easy to be with. You didn't judge him for his lack of intellectual (academically) it was actually the opposite. Every time he felt down, you were the first one cheering him up and highlighting some other qualities he had.

"That's very manly bro" Kirishima threw both of his thumbs up with a big smile plastered on his face, completely forgetting he had a magazine on his hands.

"I really hope that you talk about me like that too, bunch of assholes!" Mina mumbled.

"Nah, we mostly talk about your lack of reasoning when you decide to wear animal print. That's so last decade!" Sero joked.

"You son of a bitch!" Mina yelled throwing him a pillow who ended up being one of the many reasons he lost in the race. "Haha, you deserved that loser." She stuck her tongue out, and Sero mimicked her.

"Please don't tear up my fucking room" Bakugo scolded them and they returned to their activities.

"Also, about Mina saying she's shy, she's not... she's chaotic in a way that no one expects her to be. You always see her so composed, but she's an entire other person once she's in his comfort zone. " Denki laughed at a memory that came back to his mind from one of the nights you two went out.

The last sentence of Denki had him motivated. He didn't need an excuse when it came to you, but he was eager and stubborn, and he needed to see with his own eyes that hidden part of you.

He knew exactly what he had to do.

...

You made your way back to your room when the sun was far from down. Eri and you turned the study session into a pancake dinner day. Save to say that Aizawa's white roof would never be white again unless he put all his soul to clean the stains of the batter away.

Rubbing your eyes because of the lack of sleep, you entered your building and walking like a zombie to your floor. You were happy to be alone. Jirou sent you a message that she would be staying at Denki's room for the night and you could never be happier. You were tired in a way that was draining your soul. Midterms were coming like a wave ready to crash adding the past event in your life that wreck the normality of it. But now, you had studied all the afternoon, you sure would have a good night of sleep and the Bakugo topic was more than solved.

Everything was making sense again. Oh and don't forget your upcoming date.

You let yourself breathe again and expand the capacity of your lungs like you were inhaling oxygen for the first time. It felt actually nice, it was like rebooting yourself just by doing so mundane like breathing.

"About time"

Nevermind.

Bakugo stood beside your room door looking hot as ever. He was wearing a black hoodie with his cap on, a matching jogger in his lower part.

"What are you doing here?" you whispered. It was late and there wasn't a soul around.

"I was running and decided to check on you" he shrugged when you stood in front of him squinting your eyes in disbelief. "Fine, there's one lie and one truth in that sentence"

You crossed your arms on top of your chest and he couldn't help eyeing your neckline.

"The truth is that I was running" he smirked and you rolled your eyes trying to hide your smile. Damn bastard. "Are we going to talk here? on the hallway?"

Taking the keys out of your pocket you reached to put them inside the lock, turning the knob after. Switching the lights, you dropped your bag in your desk and sat in your bed exhaling and laying yourself on top of the duvet.

"Did you bring food?" you asked to say something. Your stomach was full of pancakes but the thought of his cooking had you almost drooling.

"Nah, I have a proposal for you and if you say yes maybe and just maybe I'll reward you with a dish"

A proposal? You pushed your body up ready to read him. Was he joking? Maybe it was just like when he asked you to be friends or maybe it was something worse, like breaking his promise. You knew that accepting his friendship would have its perks, like the possibility of him trying to get under your pants. You were making mental jumps because of it. You knew very well the men like him, cocky, unreachable with superiority complex.

"It's not what you think" he huffed annoyed. "I'm not going to start an argument because of your lack of trust"

If you thought that you could read him, you were wrong and the worst part is that he could do that to you instead. Were you that transparent?

"I'm listening" you said trying to maintain your face neutral.

The vibe in the room changed, there wasn't that fun and easy-going atmosphere anymore. You were expecting the most mischievous proposal but instead, you were surprised when he opened his mouth.

"My mom is hosting a party and she's making me go with a plus one. I invited everyone but they all have plans. If I show up by myself she's going to be the death of me for the entire night" he murmured loud enough for you to hear. It seemed that just by saying that he was losing at least half of his pride.

"So you want me to go with you..." you stated the obvious.

"You're my last resource, don't let the invitation get over your head" he said breaking eye contact with you and rumaging through your stuff.

"Oh you do know how to make a girl feel special" you said sarcastically.

Laying down, you went back to your positions now, instead of just resting, thinking. The truth was that after imagining the worst case scenario you couldn't come with an excuse good enough to said no to him.

"What's the dress code?" you asked watching at your roof. You heard how he was picking every stuff from your desk as well as you did with his stuff on his room.

"Don't worry about it, I have something for you to wear" he answered nonchalantly

Of course he has. You said under your breath in exasperation. Now you were actually caged. There was no opportunity of saying no.

"Fine" you hummed in response.

Bakugo felt like his heart was about to explode. When he asked Denki about you and came with that idea he was expecting that you would be hard to crack. He had at least three different forms of convincing you to go to the party with him. He didn't use one.

"I'm going to pick you up tomorrow at six, be ready by that. I'll send the dress first thing in the morning"

He was finding hard to keep his neutral facade with you, like he wasn't excited about it.

"Tomorrow!?" you exclaimed standing in a quick movement. "Are you fucking with me?"

The look on your face was between a bottle of water in the middle of the dessert and a loudly clown in a silent room. He didn't know that he needed to see you in distress until now and he was quite amused at your panicked state.

"Yeah it's nothing just a stupid party with a lot of people" he rolled his eyes acting bored.

It didn't sound like nothing to you. You knew Bakugo's parents were important in the fashion industry and now he was dropping a bomb like it wasn't going about to explode in your face.

He grabbed the knob of your door and twisted it until the door was open in front of him.

"Don't you worry, it's not like there will be the most important people of Japan" he paused and then a wicked smile appeared on his face. "Oh shit, yeah there will"

He left you dumbfounded and alone with the train of thoughts that appeared right after he closed the door. And you thought you will be having a nice night of sleep? The world was messing with you again.

In his room, hanging in the doors of his closet, Bakugo had the stunning dress he had picked that afternoon after he kicked out all of his friend out of his room. A red satin long dress with an opening in the right leg. He didn't know if you had matching shoes but he make sure of that when the assitant of the shop handed him the dress. Lacy high heels he knew you would love.

Everyone knew that Bakugo was a smart man, and being in the industry for years without wanting it made him learn things unconsciously like what size people were only by looking at them. He was sure that the dress and the shoes would fit you and, of course, make you way more gorgeous than you already were.

Your night was summed up in pacing all night. You walked through your room, you rearranged your desk three times, you even changed your bed sheets a week earlier trying to succumb the anxiety rising up from the pit of your stomach.

Well, what's done is done. You already said yes and there was no enough amount of excuse that would prevent you from going.

You've never attended a nice party before. You looked up Bakugo's parents on the internet and the sight of them smiling in a picture wearing haute couture made you shrink in your position in bed. You thought about biting your nails but then a reasonable thought appeared on your mind, there was no way that you would go to that party and meet those people with your nails all bitten.

Finally, the sun was up in the sky and you made it through the night sleeping the vast amount of four hours. You felt fresh like a rotten veggie rusting in the back of the fridge.

Just as he said, a few little knocks on your door startled you right after you opened your eyes.

"Why is Bakugo sending you this?" Denki raised his left brow while raising the dress covered in a gray bag.

No hello, no how are you's, straight to the damn point.

"Uhm, where's Jirou?" If you were going to explain yourself you'll rather doing it just once.

"She went to the bathroom, she's coming tho, what's going on?" He took a step inside of the room and left the dress on top of your dresser removing the wrinkles with his hands.

"Here I am! I took a piss almost standing with a feet inside the stall and the other outside the bathroom, what the hell is going on!?"

Curious Jirou was your absolute favorite when you weren't involved in the thing she wanted to know because you were almost sure that she was just a few seconds away of grabbing your bedside table's lamp to hold it above your eyes to interrogate you.

"Bakugo invited me to this thing of his parents because no one was able to go with him, not a big deal" you waved your hand at them like it was actually nothing when you were boiling on the inside.

"Not big deal??" She exclaimed. "I took a peak of that dress and girl, that didn't seem like not a big deal" she quoted you in the air and you walked to the dress to pry inside.

The way both of your hands rose to clap your mouth shut proved Jirou right.

A red satin dress whose fabric and lacy straps screamed money and luxury to you laid flat and still in your hand-me-down duvet.

"It also came with these" Denki appeared above your shoulder with a pair of strappy heels.

You shook your head several times in disapproval. No. When Bakugo said that he had a dress, you never expected for him to casually lend you a, you could guess, a few pairs of zero dress. And heels that would match its glamor and price.

"What are you doing?" Jirou asked Denki in a hum.

"Looking at the price of this thing" He scanned the dress with his phone and shook his head and then he scanned the heels. "The dress is nowhere to be found but the heels, oh my god, don't even touch that"

"Don't be ridiculous, I don't think is that exp-" Jirou's eyes widen, and you could swear that they were about to pop out of their sockets. "Don't touch them? More like, don't breathe near them!"

"Dial his number Denki. I need to talk to him now. " You rushed to your friend while he was taking his phone out of his jacket.

"Put him on speaker," Jirou commented side eyeing you.

After a few rings, the sound of static and him clearing his throat startled the three of you.

"If something happened to that dress I swear to god-" Bakugo gruff voice echoed in your room.

"It's not that! When you said a party, I thought you meant like a casual party, almost as a jeans and top party, not a champagne toast, chandeliers and limousines party" you freaked out.

"Oh, so you liked the dress," he said, and you could practically see the smirk plastered on his face.

"There's no way I'm going to use that. The shoes cost more than my whole tuition!"

"I don't see the problem. Besides, you're not that clumsy to tear them up in just one night. I assure you nothing is going to happen, I'm going to pick you up, help you walk, and stay by your side, taking care that no one put a damn finger on it, if that is your concern"

In his own room, he was trying to keep it cool while the mere possibility of you bailing it out made his leg tremble under his desk. This was his shot. He had accepted the weird feelings he had toward you, and now he needed to taste the waters to see if there was any chance for him.

"I'm picking you up at six. Don't be late, " he hung up.

He wouldn't give you the opportunity to leave him hanging.

Classes were slower than usual. Fortunately, you had most of them with Jirou, so if you thought that she would drop the incident of the morning, you thought wrong.

"I don't know what's on his mind, but the bright side is that you have the chance to wear a nice dress for once without having to sell your soul to the devil" she said while scribbling some notes. You raised your brow at her, and she gasped. "He's not the devil"

"Since when are you a Bakugo defender?" You asked, leaning on your head on your open hand.

"I'm not his defender is just he's just behaving like a normal human being, acting like a friend, and don't forget he ate that crap the other day, for me that's like the ultimate act of love" she exaggerated.

"I wouldn't go that far," you rolled your eyes at her. "I'm with you on that, except for the latter, but I still think that he has hidden intentions." Jirou titled her head in confusion. "He's used to getting everything he wants, and normally he does, and when I appeared and opened my mouth, everything went downhill for him"

"So you think that he's only using you? For revenge? I don't think he's that wicked. " Jirou bit the tip of his pen giving it a profound thought.

"I don't know"

And for once in your life, you didn't want to know.

The same afternoon, you were at your room with your makeup and hair done. Jirou helped you to look like a decent person, and she also helped you put on your dress without leaving any stains.

"I swear to god, this is gorgeous," she exclaimed.

You admired yourself in the mirror. The fabrics traced the shape of your body in a way that almost made you faint. Growing up in an orphanage, you never had the opportunity of dressing nice. This was the first time that you actually felt like a princess.

Three knocks on the door echoed in the room. You looked at the clock, and you still had a whole fifteen minutes before Bakugo's arrival. Maybe something happened, you wouldn't have the chance to know because you didn't have his number.

You hurried to pick up some jewelry, a pair of golden earrings with a matching necklace that lay on your desk.

"Sensei?" Jirou asked and gave a step back to let Aizawa enter the room. Aizawa looked for you, and when he caught the glimpse of you dressed to the ninens, he was utterly confused.

"What's going on?" He asked slowly.

"I'm going to a party," you said, clicking the earrings to your lobes. You had a few more piercings, so you decided to look for new ones to combine.

"With Bakugo," Jirou chimed in giggling at your death stare.

"What?" Aizawa turned from Jirou to you.

"He asked me to be his plus one to one of his parent's events, no biggie," you said, clasping the back of your necklace while the two of them were talking with glances. "It's not what you are thinking"

"What am I thinking?" He pretended not having understood.

"It's not meet the parents, I swear, I'll just go, eat some boujee shit and look pretty" you shrugged.

Aizawa nodded in acknowledgment and then smiled a bit.

"You do look pretty," he said like a proud dad. "You should send a picture to Eri"

"Why don't I take the picture of the two of you?" Jirou said, excited. "You didn't have any proms, right? This could be the replacement of family photos"

You wouldn't lie. The mere idea of it made you excited, too. You had your best friend and your father figure with you in a moment you never thought you would ever have.

"Fine, but I want you out before Bakugo arrives, I don't want the: bring her in one piece show"

"Oh, don't worry, I'm going to have a serious talk with that boy," he joked.

Or that's what you thought.

Bakugo was ready to pick you thirty minutes before the time he set, so now, he had thirty minutes to pace in his room with his tux on and a lot of thoughts running through his mind.

The palms of his hands were sweating, and he restricted himself to apply more perfume on his collar. He didn't want to provoke you a headache, but he didn't want to smell like caramel either.

He went straight to his car, and although your building was almost in front of his building, he waited in the car, blasting loud music to keep his nerves on the line.

When the clock marked six pm, he made sure to lock his car and, with big steps, made his way to your building, playing with the keys on his fingers he stepped into the elevator and clicked the third floor.

The door of your room opened at the second knock, and Denki's girlfriend was the one on the other side of the wood.

"Are you ready?" She smiled widely, and Bakugo felt the emotions running in his stomach.

"Don't make a fuzz over it"

You appeared in slow motion. Well, that's how he recalls it. He was absolutely right about the dress and the heels. He felt his mouth drying just at the sight of you in front of him. Your makeup was subtle but remarked the main factions of your face. Your eyes were stunning and sparkling, and your mouth highlighted with a subtle shadow of light brown lipstick and gloss on top.

"You -" he stuttered. He cursed himself on his mind for acting like a teenager. "You look beautiful"

You smiled at him, and your cheeks went red in an instant but this time it wasn't for shame, it was purely because of his compliment.

"Let's go," he offered his arm, and you happily clung to it. You needed the balance.

"Have fun!" Jirou screamed from the door when you two walked away from her.

The ride in the car was nice. The spring breeze made you shiver a few times, but he was quick enough to pull the windows up. You thanked him in your mind.

On the other hand, Bakugo was sweating like a pig. He knew he needed to look at the road, but he was so mesmerized by your beauty that he couldn't help staring at you, giving you subtle glances.

He didn't want the ride to be silent, but he didn't know what to say without giving away too much or making a shame of himself.

He was a nervous wreck.

The two of you arrived at the venue with the sun setting on your backs. You had your arm locked on Bakugo's to maintain stability in your heels. With the heels on, he was only half of a head taller than you, so know you could actually see his eyes without killing your neck in the process.

The thematic of the party was classic and luxurious. You weren't wrong about the chandeliers and the champagne because the first thing you saw above your head was an enormous chandelier hanging from the roof, which was very far from the ground and about the champagne, after your mouth almost fell from his junction at the sight of the warm light, a waiter dressed in black waved his tray with multiples flute cups urging you to take one.

Bakugo was kind enough to take two of them and nodded at the waiter, who continued to offer them to the other guests.

Man, you needed at least three of them to just adjust yourself to the atmosphere.

"D'you like it?" He asked, offering the beverage.

"I mean, yeah, it's amazing, and I can't even begin to think the work your parents had to put on this, but I feel like an ant in a shark tank"

He smirked at your comparison.

"You look good," he assured you.

Before you could say anything a tug in your shoulder made you both turn around.

"Who's this?"

The femenine image of Bakugo was in front of you, looking at you with awe and sparkling eyes.

"I thought I'll have enough time to sneak out before bumping into you, mom." he rolled his eyes, and his mom didn't waste time smacking his shoulder with her hand.

"Don't talk to me like that, Katsuki. I'm your goddamn mother, " she flicked his son's forehead and then, like nothing happened, returned to you. "Who are you, darling?"

"She's my friend," Bakugo said before you could open your mouth. He looked constipated like he was trying so hard that you didn't talk.

"Hi, Mrs Bakugo, I'm very pleased to meet you," you said after giving her your name.

"Katsuki, I thought you'll bring your friends, this is a nice surprise." she was genuinely excited. "Are you his girlfriend or his girl-friend?" she waved her arms, stating the comparison with a playful wink that made you blush.

"She's just my friend," Bakugo answered, annoyed. "Where's dad?"

"Oh, he's over there sweeping away the candy table, I swear that man loves too much those little macaroons," she smiled at the sight of her husband. "Anyway, enjoy the party, I hope to see you again, darling," she squeezed your shoulder in her way out.

"She's cool," you said once she was out of sight.

Bakugo snorted and shook his head.

"That's because she doesn't scream at you, c'mon, let me introduce you to my dad" he grabbed your hand this time pulling you through the crowd and you didn't know how to feel about the sudden interaction.

Bakugo's dad was visibly the opposite of his mom. He was quiet, very calm and nice. He asked you about college and about your quirk. The three of you talked about random topics for almost half an hour, and you could tell that Bakugo was more relaxed around his dad than with his mom.

The party began after a speech from both of Bakugo's parents talking about the fashion industry and his own company. The start of it, the challenges they went through in the way of what was today and everything. They thanked their employees, which you found very modest of them, in the best sense of the word.

Then everyone was in their world talking to each other and laughing at the memories they shared. You and Bakugo were leaning in the bar table, asking for something else than champagne. Your tongue wasn't used to refined alcohol.

"Is it always like this?" You asked watching everyone from afar.

"Yeah, the best part is that they only do this twice a year, I need to use the bathroom. Can you stay here and wait for the drinks?" You nodded and gave him a small smile that he gave back.

In his absence, you took the time to look at your phone and replied to Jirou's text since it was just one text you needed to reply to. You started scrolling through the apps and watching stories from your friends. Mina's story appeared just after you accepted on being her friend.

The image of her and Bakugo's friend appeared in an instant. They were hanging together and playing cards in a bar while drinking beer. You felt the champagne in your stomach twirl and made you nauseous.

Why did they tell Bakugo that they were busy?

You were thinking about telling him or not when he appeared and looked above your shoulder.

"What are you doing?" He asked, raising his brow at you.

He didn't give you the time to hide the evidence, so he was very stunned when he watched his friend's story.

"I'm so sorry they lied to you," you said sadly.

His reaction took you by surprise. He wasn't sad or angry. Instead, he was stoic, he standed there thinking and looking at the abyss shuffling the options in his mind.

"It's okay, I didn't invite them," he shrugged and sat on the bar stool, taking the glass of something in his hand.

The look on your face was epic.

"What? But you told me-" you were dumbfounded.

"I know what I told you," he interrupted. "I just didn't want you to say no and I really wanted you to come"

The last time someone was so eager to spend time with you was when you were in charge of the twins, and the couple who adopted them wanted to be by their side all the time.

"Why?" You said confused by his actions.

"I wanted to know you better, like friends do." he wasn't even looking at you, focused completely on sipping from his glass. Yours was in front of you when you realized that it was a Cosmopolitan that you haven't ordered. He remembered.

"Well, I don't know what to say"

"It's okay if you're mad" he mumbled under his breath. He didn't want you to be mad.

"Mad? I'm flattered. I mean, yesterday I was the last option, and now I'm the only option you had in mind since the beginning, " you said toying with your fingers.

You didn't like any sort of lies, but you could understand why he did that. You weren't very open with anyone but your friends so it was very difficult to reach you sometimes. At least he was trying.

"So, do you like to dance, or am I just going to use this dress like a mannequin?" You said batting your long lashes at him.

"Your wishes are my commands, ma'am," he offered his hand, and you took it without hesitating.

"Oh my god, you're so damn cocky"

Your cheeky tone made butterflies erupt in Bakugo's body. That shithead of Kaminari was right. You were absolutely fun to have around.

After a few dances and a lot of drinking, at least for your part, because Bakugo had to drive you back, you were a giant mess. You felt the heat in your body and your feet staring to swell because of the dances. Bakugo was a great dancer, he knew how to sway and how twirl you without leaving you on the ground. You made fun of him multiple times and he took advantage of your state giving you the false sensation that after a spin he would actually drop you.

"I'm a mess right now," you stated the obvious. The drink was way over your head, and it made your legs feel lightweight.

"Yeah, you've stomped in my feet three times," he grinned grabbing you firmly by your waist.

"I'm sorry," you pouted. "I needed to make sure you weren't feeling so confident about your dancing skills. What a bummer! Do you really have to be good at everything? It's exhausting, Bakugo"

The way he laughed at you made you feel whole. He was genuinely laughing, heading back and relaxed shoulder. The whole starting pack of finding you funny.

"Katsuki," he returned to his normal state.

"What?" you asked. Your mind was working slowler than usual.

"You can call me Katsuki after you crushed my feet and almost teared off my arm when you thought you were falling, I think we are okay with first name basis"

Your emotions were in a state of haze. You could blame the alcohol in your veins, but you could also blame the stunning man in front of you, glancing your figure and never letting go of your skin.

He looked as hypnotized as you, but he was more in his right mind to make a subtle move.

Leaning and entering in your space, he took a loose lock of your hair with his fingers and carefully placed it behind your ear, taking the moment to hang in there for a while.

You gulped at the feeling of having him so close.

"I think we should dance one last time before we go," he whispered in your ear.

The slow music played through the speakers. Katsuki grabbed your hand, who was tiny against his big one. He placed the other hand in your waist while yours stayed in his shoulder. The intense look you were sharing gave you enough time to look at his eyes and memorize them. In the warm and fainty light, they looked brighter than other occasions, or maybe it was just because you now were taking your time to really look at them.

Katsuki felt the same way, he sweep your entire face with his eyes while guiding your dance. Your big eyes looked at him like he was the only thing in the world, the tip of your nose little red just as well as your cheeks and your lips, slightly apart and puffy, he wanted to kiss you so bad.

Would you let him? Kiss you?

He wanted to ask, but he was afraid. Bakugo Katsuki was afraid of asking a girl to please let him kiss her?

At that point, he didn't mind begging you to let him taste the sweet of your lips. He was dealing with his own devils inside of his brain. He promised you that his only intention was to be your friend, and now, after a splendid day, his own instincts were about fuck everything up or make it better.

Without even noticing, he started to lean towards you, and you were leaning as well to meet him in the middle. When he realized you were halfway to stamp your lips on his. Your eyes fluttered in between staying open and closed and he sucked his air because it was about to happen.

Ride or die, he thought.

You were inches away from each other when abruptly you shrinked in your position and your eyes snapped open in pain.

Your ankle sabotaged you.

After a little fuzz about it, where the two of you decided to forget the previous situation, you were situated in Katsuki's front seat with the help of his dad and a waiter. Your ankle was getting bigger and bigger and Katsuki couldn't stop looking at it.

"We have to go to emergencies," he stated.

You waved him off, rolling your eyes and internally screaming because of the pain. Damn high heels, you would never use them again.

"It's okay, I'll go to recovery girl tomorrow morning, and she'll do something about it"

That was the main plan. Katsuki felt stupid because with the preoccupation of you in any sort of pain, he forgot that you had all the possibilities with Aizawa being your guardian.

Once you reached your building, he made sure of leaving you safely and tucked in your bed. He even wanted to carry you bridal style to your room, but you adamantly opposed the possibility of being the main gossip of the week.

"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you tomorrow?" He asked for what it seemed the tenth time. Jirou, who was at his back, had a finger lifted for every time he asked that.

"It's okay, Jirou can take me, right?" You said calmly.

"Sure," she faked innocence, hiding his hands behind his back.

"Here, my number." he took your phone from his jacket and put his number on your contacts. "Text me tomorrow, or you'll have me here all day"

God forbid.

"Fine," you smirked. "I had a good time, thank you"

He tucked his hands on his pant's pockets and nodded in agreement.

When the door closed, Jirou watched you with her eyes wide open in amusement.

"I know, don't say anything," you curled up to touch your ankle and see it closely. "This look nasty"

"Girl," she stated, not believing a thing she had just seen.

...

You didn't sleep a wink from the pain. Jirou stayed all night with you icing your entire feet to deflate it, but it didn't work.

The sun was getting up in the sky, and the both of you were tired and sitting in your bed with your backs against the wall.

"Thank god the only class I have today is skippable," she said, yawning.

"Mine is not skippable but I'll make it skippable" you said changing the ice pack to your other hand. "I'll talk to Aizawa"

"Did you asked why he was here yesterday?"

You've forgotten about that.

"No" you shook your head. "I didn't even give it a thought"

She hummed in response and the two of you fell in a comfort silence where you took the chance to close your eyes a little.

"Don't you think you are playing two teams?" Jirou asked while taking the ice pack from your hand and icing your ankle herself.

Her voice startled you less than his ask.

"No," you hissed when she hit a sensitive spot. "I mean, Bakugo invited me to that thing, I said yes, we danced...very close and intimate I'm not going to lie about it and then I sprinted my ankle and now I'm here, what's that of two teams"

"You are practically panicking because of your ankle, I know you have a date with Todoroki, but maybe this is a sign." She said reading your mind.

Todoroki had crossed your mind just once and it was when you started to think in your classes and how you'll go to them in one foot.

"I can't leave him hanging." You said. "Besides, Bakugo invited me as his friend. He asked me to be his friend not a week ago, there no reason to not go to my date tomorrow"

"Fair point," she nodded. "Aren't you betraying yourself with this? Like in that blubbering mess you were last night, you explicitly told me that you felt your stomach doing a flip every time he pressed his hand on your waist"

You blamed the pain and the alcohol.

"If I don't remember, that means it didn't happen." You grinned at her, and she bumped her shoulder at you playfully

Oh, but you did remember, and it brought you mixed feelings that you didn't know how to deal with. With the sun rays of the morning stepping in your room through your curtains you couldn't help but think how fucked you were.

(Not proofread yet)

End note: I know I made you wait, but the waiting had its purpose. My winter break is over :( and since I've been updating on Wednesdays, I needed to re-schedule this to Fridays. For the wait, this chapter is longer and involves more scenarios and the "date" that I know you didn't see it coming. Bakugo surpassed Todoroki without knowing it! Devil works hard but Bakugo wanting reader works harder.

A penny for your thoughts about this (not really but express yourself)

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[haesunflower]

zb1 as the "best friend's brother" trope

genre: fluff/comedy

pairing: reader (gn) x all members of zerobaseone

about/tags: zerobaseone as "best friend's brother" but not all are romantic

thank you anon for req, some are not accurate in terms of siblings, mentions of violence but not actually violent, kinda pg for jiwoong, secret relationships for some, yujin is platonic!

⠀⠀ kim jiwoong ⠀⠀

"she's gonna kill me when she finds out, you know"

jiwoong is occupied with tracing small kisses along your neck, too busy showering you with affection to care about what his sister thinks about dating you

"so?" he says. you try to push him away, giggling while you try to explain that older brothers are usually off limits.

he's a full on tease, and he knows exactly the power he holds over you when he says "you'd bend the rules for me though, yeah?"

you kiss him again as confirmation "yeah, yeah i would"

your best friend, does in fact think about ~killing~ you when she finds out

but she sees how much her brother has changed, he's happier now, and decides maybe it is better that you stay together.

⠀⠀ zhang hao ⠀⠀

(i know he's an only child so let's just pretend okay)

one thing about you and hao is that you can both take a secret to your graves

so no one ever finds about you sneaking out of his sister's room during your weekend sleepovers, only to cuddle up to him on his bed. no one finds out about the secret dates you go on in the next town over, so that you don't get caught. and no one finds out about the secret phones you both use to contact each other.

if you have to be in the same room together, he's not even making any eye contact with you. it's better to ignore each other in public, like you always have.

when you guys are 7 months into the relationship, spooning on his bed, he asks "how long do you want to keep us a secret?

to which you reply "not any longer than you want to."

so yeah, you can both keep a secret – until you decide you want to share it to the world

your friend is disgusted, but happy for you. emphasis on disgusted tho.

⠀⠀ sung hanbin ⠀⠀

you like going to ludia cafe because one, food is always free as long as you're with hanareum (hanbin's younger sister) and two, hanbin makes the said food

you have a massive schoolgirl crush on hanbin, and he is aware to some degree that you like him. i mean you ask all sorts of questions like "oppa what do you like doing for fun?" or "oppa are you seeing anyone?" "oppa what are you going to study for university? "

and him being the nice person that he is, he answers all your questions genuinely with a large customer service smile

after he debuted you kept supporting him as a fan, only to show up to girls planet season two a year later to make your debut too.

when he sees you again, hanbin tells you that you grew up really well, and that you can rely on him as a sunbae. your relationship stays like that for a while, platonic hoobae and sunbae. on holidays, you even travel to your hometown together. and you see each other outside work often because you both show up to support hanareum's sporting events.

it takes a while, like YEARS, for hanbin to view you as a potential romantic interest. but seeing you laugh alongside his sister during chuseok, he can't help but think about how you're technically already part of the family.

⠀⠀ seok matthew ⠀⠀

don't get it twisted HE has a crush on YOU

being neighbors and the same age as his older sister yaeby, meant that you practically grew up in the seok household too. but you always viewed matthew as your best friend's dorky little brother.

you and yaeby used to dress him up in girl clothes and make him perform, and as he got older, this evolved to him becoming an errand boy for whenever you guys had parties or friends over. matthew of course he did everything you asked because he finds you so so so pretty, how can he say no?

you're an avid supporter of their entire family, so you also fly to korea to support matthew during the finals, along with his mom and sister. he's a little surprised when he sees you, then a little embarrassed when he realized you also saw him cry like a baby.

you ruffled his hair and said "congrats matthew!!"

now, he actively flirts with you for fun because you'll always be his first crush. you never considered taking his advances seriously up until recently because when the hell did he grow up

woohyun oppa agenda is working....and yae makes fun of you for it

⠀⠀ kim taerae ⠀⠀

he's practicing a song he wrote in the living room when his older sister innocently asks who it's about

"um...yeah it's...it's umm about...umm.." literally cannot give a straight answer because how do you tell your older sister that it's a song for her best friend

her best friend that he secretly makes out with behind the school parking lot, her best friend that drives with him to go get takeout at 2am, and her best friend that he's so painfully in love with but doesn't have the actual guts to ask them out

"is it about y/n?" he's shocked when his sister asks. he finds out that you've already told her, and he's relieved he doesn't have to walk around eggshells anymore.

actually his sister has known all along, you were very open and honest about it when you started catching feelings about your bff's younger brother. taerae had just assumed you were ashamed to be dating someone a year younger, so he thought he ought to keep it a secret unless told otherwise

when he confesses that to you, you can't help but giggle. you proceed to squish his cheeks as you say "why would I ever want to keep you a secret, silly"

⠀⠀ ricky ⠀⠀

ricky thinks it's so cute, how you're constantly paranoid that someone will catch you two doing something remotely couple-y

you guys weren't a secret or anything, but you wanted to remain ~respectful~ and would very much want to avoid being teased by your friend group. therefore keeping pda at a minimum.

when he hugs you in the middle of his kitchen, you attempt to release his grip from you when you say "what if someone sees, ricky?"

"look around, no one's here" and he's right, no one is there. so you let him bury his face into your neck as he hugs you, and he's whispering something about how you smell like warm vanilla cookies.

when his sister, your best friend, enters the room she says something along the lines of "ugh you two are so gross. get a room."

and you're all like -_- "see. i told you this was gonna happen."

⠀⠀ kim gyuvin ⠀⠀

you have the biggest crush on him and you don't even try to hide it

your best friend tells you that you have no chance, after all his brother is a "hot commodity" in the school. but you wanna make yourself known as an option, you're only a year younger after all!

you literally bum around their house every weekend, and flat out flirt in front of everyone. "when's our date, gyuvin oppa ;)" or "how long are you going to keep me waiting for you?"

you remain unbothered at his clumsy and awkward responses, and strongly believe that in the end, he'll fall for you anyways. your best friend calls you extremely delusional and overconfident – but, gyuvin lowkey finds it adorable that you have a little crush on him

you're right tho about him falling for you in the end

once you stopped visiting the house every weekend, gyuvin asks his brother why you haven't been coming over anymore

"oh hyung, they have a boyfriend now"

and he's all like "boyfriend? since when? what? i thought they liked me?"

is slightly offended and highly intrigued that you got a boyfriend w/o him knowing

⠀⠀ park gunwook ⠀⠀

gunwook often wonders why his older brother isn't dating you.

"hyung, are you sure you're just best friends. like sure sure?"

because he thinks you're the perfect person: beautiful, smart, tall, funny, even plays genshin impact. his brother teases him, "if you think she's so great, why don't YOU date her gunwook-ah"

as if on cue, you walk back into the room and ask what everyone's talking about. and gunwook's brother just full on exposes him like "gunwook has a crush on you"

his cheeks turn so red, and he's so defensive when he says "hyung, i do not!"

you think it's adorable, so you pinch gunwook's bready cheeks :D saying something along the lines of "you're too young for me wookie"

⠀⠀ han yujin ⠀⠀

you're really close friends with yujin's older brother

and yujin often goes to you for "girl advice" since you're the only girl he knows that isn't his classmate sjhdbjh

he'd ask questions about what gifts to give when you confess to someone, what to say in a love letter, and he'd even ask for date place recommendations

you're bamboozled as to why yujin is such a sweet kid, meanwhile his brother is a pain in your friend group's ass

one time yujin got rejected, and you found him sulking alone at the dinner table eating the box of cookies he was gonna give his crush. he offers you one, and you both eat in silence before consoling him.

"yujinie, you're still young. you'll meet plenty of other people that are a far better match for you. don't worry." he mumbles something about being single forever and you giggle, telling him he's being a little dramatic lol

A/N: i tried researching on their siblings to find out if y/n would be older or younger lol but again, not all are accurate!!

personally, the jiwoong one got me.

૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

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[captain-hen]

the ‘sunshine personified’ / ‘he makes everyone around him happy’ thing is sooo interesting because i don’t think we’ve really seen that from buck, have we? and by that i specifically mean in the fanon context of buck being the social PTA dad at all of chris’s school functions while eddie broods in the corner and only wants to talk to buck. if anything, we’ve seen the opposite behavior with eddie — he’s clearly good friends with chris’s friends’ parents, he was so happy and glowy when he first met the 118, he befriended may and linda so easily at dispatch, and i could go on and on.

he just seems to connect with people so easily, and i think a lot of that genuine friendliness is lost on people because he also has a tendency to get casually snarky with people he isn’t so fond of, whether it’s annoying temporary coworkers or selfish people on calls or opportunistic reporters. the same thing goes for his private nature vs. buck’s bleeding heart — it’s assumed that eddie isn’t a people person because he likes to keep his innermost feelings close to his chest and it’s also assumed that buck is good at instantly forming connections bc his feelings spill out of him at all times.

and like. it’s not that buck isn’t a kind and friendly person, but i do feel like his specialty is deep acts of love for the people he loves. idk if i’m articulating this right but i’m trying to point out that he’s never more ‘sunshine personified’ than when he’s with the 118 and co. he would do anything for them and he lights up around them in a way that he doesn’t really do with anyone else. and we haven’t seen him be so casually close to people outside that friend group.

when we got a glimpse of connor and buck’s friendship, it seemed more about what they could do for each other than about true connection. when we got that episode about buck and red, a lot of it was projection on buck’s part re. his fear of abandonment and his desire not to let his future turn out like red’s and it was also about his need to fix things for everyone else so he can feel like he’s needed. when he met lucy, he was desperate to fill a void and not feel as hollow as he felt going home to taylor kelly every night with his sister and his brother in law and his partner gone.

don’t get me wrong, i’m not trying to ascribe selfish motivations to buck bc i do believe he always tries to do the right thing, but when it comes to people outside of the 118, with the way it’s been written in canon, i feel like those dynamics have always been more about his own issues than they’ve been about actual friendship. and this isn’t even getting into how he acts when he feels like someone new is encroaching on his territory (see: eddie in 2x01 and lena). idk….i just think that kind of casual connection comes so much easier to eddie for whatever reason. maybe it’s because his abandonment issues are a whole other flavor, or because eddie’s upbringing was so different from buck’s. either way, it’s so interesting and ppl blinded by fanon are really missing out. i apologize for the long ass rambling and i don’t think i really articulated this well, so TL;DR — fanon sunshine buck and broody eddie do not exist in canon and i’m Very excited to see the way that mr. possessive, jealous, broody evan buckley acts when eddie meets someone new this week :)

no, you're so right about all of this, though! buck genuinely does light up and is at his most comfortable and golden retriever-like around the 118, because he sees them as family and trusts them so much—and i think people get carried away and attribute the same thing to everything else (like, for example, the social PTA dad thing). when in canon, buck on multiple occasions has not dealt with new people too well—whether it was eddie, or lena, or ravi...and now, as it looks like, tommy. and you kinda hit the nail on the head about how most of buck's relationships outside the 118 being very transactional in nature up to this point, it's sad, but it's true.

eddie is the complete opposite in this regard, though, like, the guy goes around collecting new friends like they're pokemon. lol. he is so wildly different to the fandom portrayal of him as this anti-social loner that i struggle with understanding how people even got there in the first place (i mean, i know why. but still).

anyway, buck's issues with jealousy and insecurity are sooo interesting to delve into as character flaws and so much more compelling than fandom's portrayal of him as a perfect angel baby who's never done anything wrong, but 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ at least i have canon giving me the stuff i want lol

[crazyfor-toby]

hi!! First of all happy belated birthday no idea when you’ll see this but 🥳 I just wanted to see if you could just do some general kinda fluff for Toby and any other of your choosing during like the crush stage

also you are an amazing writer and incredibly creative whoever the douchebag who stood you up is doesn’t deserve you so get yourself a better man bc if anyone deserves it it’s you<3

so yeah that’s the end of my little rant and feel free to just ignore this ask, put yourself first!

-A ❤️

Summary :: Toby during the crush stage

Notes :: thank you so much!🤭 You are too sweet! btw I didn't know which Toby you wanted so I js did High school Toby but I can always change it if you want and make another one for him💟 I'm prob going to add Jeff later but I js wanted to get this out as soon as possible

Warnings :: none that I can think of except for the usual cursing

Readers gender :: None assigned, gender neutral

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

This guy is so fucking mean for no reason but hates whenever anyone else is mean to you

He bullies you because he doesn't know how to respond to his own emotions and he has absolutely 0 experience. Plus, he thinks you're only talking to him to mess with him at first

I can see him falling for someone because they were nice to him or because he found them physically attractive as bad as it may sound to some people. But, he does know when someone is only being nice because they feel bad or they are just trying to mess with his feelings he just wants to be treated like a normal human being not get made fun of or have people be overly nice to him because of his disorders but we can get more into those emotions another time.

Even though he can most of the time tell the difference between genuine kindness and people feeling bad, sometimes he may think that people are messing with him when they actually are being genuinely nice because he overthinks everything and lets his bad thoughts take over a lot of the time.

Would definitely zone out while staring at you as he bites his nails and hands... Gets so many side eyes and weird stares because of it too

thinks about you 24/7 to the point it affects his daily life and his mother and sister get worried

He would probably mistake his romantic feelings for platonic at first but when he realizes the only thing that changes is how mean he is to you and I don't mean he gets nicer 😃 your #1 hater and #1 supporter

He's honestly confusing, one minute he'll be thinking you hate him and he doesn't have a chance to thinking he does have a chance and that you have the same feelings for him as he does for you.

Meaning that there's like a 30% he will make a first move on you because you have to catch him in the right mood, at the right time, on the right day which is pretty hard because you'll never know what mood he'll be in and he

He literally just acts like he hates you and if you asked him out or made a move he'd turn it down but then out of no where months later he will ask you out

he's honestly such an attention whore and he only craves your attention now so good luck

the only time he can really talk to you in person outside of school is if you happen to be friends with his sister or you guys meet up somewhere like a park or a cafe which isn't that often because of his parents so he makes up for it by texting you all day

Reminder though that he isn't some soft and shy bundle of joy who is just hurt, he is crazy and is slowly going under the control of Slenderman. He can have major mood swings and will most likely make you end up not liking him for the way he treats you at first, he doesn't mean it tho he's just a lil delulu 😊

Overall, your experience is gonna be a rough 5/10 unless you don't mind his harsh words then it'd be like a 6.5 - 7.5

[your-unfriendlyghost]

I have two things to ask:

1.-Can we be friends?

2.-Do you have any Outsiders headcanons (or any that you haven't submitted yet)?

I mean sure?? Idk who you are since you’re on anon, so not REALLY, but I’m always down to talk!

2. Yeah lol- tons. Too many. Here’s a few (okay like 25 oops) off the top of my head lol, some serious/angsty and some lighthearted/kinda stupid without any real order. (Lotta ‘em are about Steve tbh -there’s so little to him in canon that I have the freedom to hc pretty much whatever I want)

Steve Randle’s nearsighted and has no idea, which is why he’s literally always squinting. (I’ve had that one for like months but only recently mentioned it on here lol.) Steve thinks his vision is completely normal

Dally and Sylvia genuinely cared for each other, but they were both so horrible at having healthy emotions that they just made each other worse. In a bad way, not a fun way.

When Steve gets kicked out, sometimes he hangs with Johnny in the lot. They don’t really talk about anything important like their shared experiences of having lousy parents. Instead they talk about cars, girls, music, school…lighthearted stuff. Sometimes Johnny will find Steve crying, which he never mentions- he’ll just sit down as per usual, which Steve appreciates. Steve almost never finds Johnny crying though. Johnny doesn’t cry much.

Okay tangent- I love how Steve and Johnny are low-key foils. Like Steve always seems tough but then cries when pushed to his limit, while Johnny always seems skittish until he’s under a bunch of pressure- in which case he suddenly is confident. (Not necessarily thriving obviously, but confident yk? Like grinning while saving those kids in the fire.) I know SE Hinton probably didn’t intend that at all, but it’s just such an interesting detail to me. One of these days I’ll put it into words better

Johnny’s jeans-jacket is a hand-me-down from either Steve or Two-Bit. (I can’t decide which lol) (obviously Dally would make sense too, but honestly I think it’d add more depth to flesh out Johnny’s relationships with the other members of the gang)

After the events of the book, Two-Bit starts hanging around the Curtis’s place even more. At first the gang assumes he’s trying to lighten the mood. It’s only after he gets sent to the cooler for a month due to drunk driving that they realize he was actually hanging around so much because he was trying to keep his kid sister from seeing him so drunk…

Two-Bit likes to joke that he keeps failing junior year so that him and his sister can graduate together. Which is a very bad idea since his sister is a year younger than Ponyboy.

Sodapop often feels like he’s only good for looking pretty and not all that useful or interesting otherwise. He likes himself, but when he stops to think about it too much, he starts to wonder if he really has anything going for him at all

My H/C for Steve’s home life is that his Mom is sick w/ like cancer or something. Before she got sick, Steve’s life was pretty alright for an eastsider- he and his dad fought, but they always made up for the most part. They weren’t perfect, but they loved each other. But after she got sick, she wasn’t there to mediate between Steve and his Dad anymore, and the fighting got worse and worse. And then Steve’s dad started drinking more and it was pretty downhill from there. Steve’s Dad still loves him, but sometimes Steve wishes that he didn’t. If he didn’t, then he could hate him. But his dad does love him, so he can’t get himself to.

Steve and Dally taught Johnny to drive when they were all like fourteen-fifteen-ish. Johnny is a very reckless driver. He loves speeding.

Johnny also loves fast roller coasters and stuff.

Dally doesn't ‘cuz he’s low-key scared of heights- he likes riding broncos and rodeos, but put him at the top of a roller coaster and he’s convinced that it’s gonna break and he’s gonna die. He pretends he doesn’t mind. The only people who know he’s scared of them are Johnny, and before she died, Mrs. Curtis.

Steve has a napoleon complex. Johnny, who is shorter than him by a few inches, likes to bully him for it sometimes

Ponyboy and Cherry don’t interact much in the school year after the book, but in the summer after, they start to hang out. Eventually they become pretty close. They fangirl over Paul Newman together

Ponyboy still doesn’t let Cherry read his theme though until years later

Marcia and Two-Bit re-meet a few months after the book. (Two-Bit is really scared that she’s embarrassed to be dating him, and Marcia is really scared that he’s embarrassed to be dating her. Neither of them are embarrassed. They both adore each other.)

Two-Bit likes to watch Marcia barrel racing. One time while he’s there, he runs into Ponyboy watching Cherry barrel race and immediately tells everyone much to Pony’s chagrin

Evie knows a little bit about cars, and she sometimes helps out at the DX during summers. Steve is so whipped for her lol (and Soda too Steve has two hands)

Evie and Sylvia are besties, but Steve and Sylvia hate each other. They act civil in front of Evie, but as soon as her back is turned they’re growling at each other like dogs. (Well Steve is. Sylvia just acts condescending as hell. Sometimes it goes over his head, so Steve knows she’s insulting him but isn’t sure what the insult is/means. Which makes Steve kinda want to kill her.)

Steve and Soda are low-key co-dependent. (Steve more so- Soda has his family at least, while to Steve, Soda and Evie are his whole world pretty much) It’s probably not super healthy, and both of them are vaguely aware of that, but are trying not to think about it too hard rn

Ponyboy’s friend group in high school consists of Curly Shepard, Mark Jennings, Scout Jenkins (from the tv show), and eventually, in her senior year, Cherry Valance. (There’s others too but those are the main ones.)

Pony dates Cathy Carlson for a while too, idk if they’re good for each other or not- I kinda like the idea of them being a sweet couple tbh, but no one else on here seems to care about them so I haven’t really explored the idea much lol

In a Dally lives au, Mark Jennings and Dally end up spending a bit of time together through Pony, and at some point they realize that they’re half-brothers lol. Mark is a deeply obnoxious little brother to have, and he drives Dally nuts on purpose. Weirdly I think Dally’s a relatively good influence on him, as much as someone like Dally can be. And Dally does care for Mark, though not as much as he cares for Johnny- Mark is, in his head, not exactly his responsibility.

Well I have (so many) more, but I think that’s enough for now lol. Point is, even though I haven’t drawn in a minute, I love these characters and their romanticized version of 1960s Tulsa so much and I think about them way too often lol

(dw once i get more into the swing of school I’ll be doin more art!)

[cherrytreegrove]

Hi! Came by your blog today when I saw you like my fics out of curiosity. Thank you for that & I see you’re a fellow writer too which makes me happy! ^u^ when doing that I thought it be cool to send you a request to enjoy a fellow writer work. Soooooooooo can I request a TMNT 2012 Leo x reader where reader is a sweet person who genuinely cares about & wants to help people which could be a strength & a weakness. Leading to sweet Leo be a bit overprotective over her especially her going out late at night where she could be vulnerable. Preferably it to be fluff where Leo is just getting butterflies with hoe sweet & understanding she is when reassuring him she’ll be okay & that she’ll try to be careful. Hope this isn’t too big of a request. 😅

You have no idea how happy this request made me!! Did this as a Female Reader because I’m used to she/her pronouns, but if you want a male or gn version, I can totally make that happen! Also sorry about this being short, this is my first time publishing a fanfic! Maybe I should do a part 2?

Kindness: Strength or Weakness?

Leo loved you with all his heart, he REALLY did, but sometimes he really worried about you. You were, what he could only describe as, an Angel, perfect human being, a saint. Your kindness and patience were incredible. Even Raph couldn’t stay mad at you and your kind heart.

When Leo would watch over you on your walks late at night, he would see how you would help stray animals, the elderly, kids your own age, children, pregnant women, anyone and everyone was a victim to your kindness. Then he would see how some people would use your kindness and take it for granted.

On multiple occasions he would see you lend money to your ‘friends’ and when he would ask, you’d say they haven't paid you yet. Many times would be shoved aside or to the ground after doing something nice or have all the credit taken from you. It made Leo so upset to see you get taken advantage of.

·˚*୨୧꒰∗ɞ̴̶̷ ·̮ ɞ̴̶̷∗꒱୨୧*˚·

“I’m just saying you should be careful, there’s dangerous people in this world, (Y/N), and I don’t want to see you get hurt..” Leo told you, placing his three fingered hand on your cheek. He had invited you to the lair to watch Space Heros. You smiled at him and giggled.

“I know that, Leo. But I believe that there are always kind people in the world, and a little bit of kindness can go a long way..besides…” You cup his face and place a gentle kiss on his nose, “I’ll always have you to protect me!” Leo blushed at your kiss and wore the most love-sick smile on his face.

·˚*୨୧꒰∗ɞ̴̶̷ ·̮ ɞ̴̶̷∗꒱୨୧*˚·

“She’s gonna get hurt one day.” Raph said, Leo turned away from the stove to look at his brother.

“Excuse me?”

“(Y/N). She’s gonna get hurt one of these days because of her stupidity.” Leo frowned at Raph. Raph saw you as his sister at times, he wanted what was best for you.

“She is not stupid Raph, she’s just kind, not like you would know what that means.” Leo smirked.

“OH SNAP! Sick burn, Leo!” Mikey laughed, high-threeing Leo. Raph chased Mikey around the kitchen with a wooden spoon.

“He’s kinda right, you know,” Donnie spoke up, looking away from his computer, “(Y/n)’s nice and all but someday she might end up helping the wrong person.”

Leo sighed, he knew the risk of your kindness. But he also knew he couldn’t stop you.

·˚*୨୧꒰∗ɞ̴̶̷ ·̮ ɞ̴̶̷∗꒱୨୧*˚·

You walked into the lair, completely drenched in water. All four of the turtles turn to look at you, Leo quickly ran up to you, throwing a blanket over you.

“(Y/N)! What happened?!” He questioned, trying to dry off your hair.

“I saw a girl from my class sitting outside in the rain, she was stood up for a date! So I gave her my umbrella and my jacket and gave her some money to go buy herself some food!” You explained, a smile on your face. Leo frowned, he wasn’t entirely surprised.

“You just give money to anyone who asks for it?” Raph scoffs, throwing Leo an extra towel to dry you off.

“If they really need it, yes!” The red turtle face palmed and went back to reading his comic book.

“(Y/N), you can’t keep giving strangers your stuff, especially when you need it!” Leo said, taking you over to the kitchen.

“First of all, it wasn’t a stranger! And second, a little-”

“Kindness goes a long way, yeah yeah…I know..” He interrupted you. Leo made you a cup of tea and watched you drink some.

“You really are an absolute angel, aren’t you..” He murmured. You perked up an eyebrow and stared at him, “Hm?”

“I just mean that you’re so sweet and kind to everyone, no matter how rude they are to you. You’re always ready to help anyone and everyone…why?” You smiled down at your cup and held Leo’s hand.

“I just really love helping people. It always makes me feel good when someone does something nice for me, so I wanted to do nice things for other people! I think we’re all good deep down on the inside, we just need someone to show us that light!” You smiled.

Leo had always admired you, and he will continue to admire you. He really does hope that the world learns from your kindness. He also hopes that no matter what this cruel and evil world might throw at you, that you’ll always remain his sweet angel.

[lightandfellowship]

Do you have any headcanons for Xehanort and Strelitzia? I enjoyed your comic about them.

Aw, thank you, glad you liked it. As for headcanons...let's see...

While I don't know exactly how Xehanort in Quadratum would work, I do think that, if it does happen, it'll have something to do with the "nature taboo" stuff from KH3 Re:Mind and Xehanort's "joke" in KHDR about wanting a 14th lifetime. I imagine the Xehanort in Quadratum is some sort of backup plan or maybe the Xehanort that was meant to continue on in the new world that Xehanort would create with Kingdom Hearts.

That being said, I think it would be fun/interesting if this Xehanort wasn't really a villain at all. Either has memory loss or is simply a Xehanort from post-KHDR but before the villain turn thanks to MoM. So he's just been living a relatively normal life in Quadratum and would be on the side of the good guys (Sora + Strel) this time.

But anyway. I think at first Xehanort and Strel would have no idea that they're connected to each other through a common "friend": Player. Like maybe initially they're drawn to each other subconsciously because they can recognize that they're connected somehow (though I don't think Xehanort would recognize her by appearance because afaik Player never saw Strel in KHUX), but their friendship definitely lasts for a good while before they realize that they've been talking to each other about the same person this entire time.

Like Strel will talk about this person she really liked and desperately wanted to meet who she never got the chance to really know, Xehanort will eventually open up about his mentor/guardian who raised him on Destiny Islands, and one day it just clicks for them that...wait...why does this person they're talking about sound so familiar....

At which point Strel is like "Oh my god. No way. You have to tell me more about them. What were their favorite foods? Hobbies? Tell me everything!" And it's through Xehanort that Strel finally gets to "know" Player better, because, well, Xehanort knew them for like 15 whole years or whatever. In fact they were the only person Xehanort ever knew for those years; it's possible that Xehanort knows Player better than anybody else in the world. (I can imagine Strel feeling a little bitter/jealous about this...)

As for their friendship outside of Player...if Eraqus isn't in Quadratum with Xehanort, I imagine Strel almost being like a replacement Eraqus, as horrible/mean as that sounds lol. Like not literally replacing him as Xehanort's friend, but much like Eraqus she's the sun to Xehanort's moon. The gold to Xehanort's silver. The white clothes to Xehanort's black clothes. She fills a similiar niche. Maybe Xehanort even thinks to himself that she reminds him of Eraqus...and maybe that makes their friendship a little bittersweet because now Xehanort misses Eraqus even more.

I imagine people like Sora being kinda confused at first by Xehanort and Strel's friendship. Strel can be sunny and sweet and a little bit of a scaredy cat, Xehanort can be a little gloomy and blunt and quite confident in himself (though they both have the "socially and/or emotionally reserved" thing going for them.) After a while though Sora realizes that Strel and Xehanort's friendship reminds him of his own friendship with Riku, and then it starts to make more sense to him. And in any case, if this means that Xehanort is making friends and not causing trouble, then Sora's fine with it.

Now, I wonder if a recompleted Lauriam looking for his sister would be okay with their friendship, though, given that Marluxia has worked with a Xehanort twice at this point and even tried to betray one of them once. Lauriam would realize that Xehanort is dangerous and can't be trusted and would probably try to screw things up for Strel and Xehanort despite their friendship actually being genuine with no ulterior motives (can't really blame Lauriam, though.) But maybe Strel would put her foot down and try to convince Lauriam that Xehanort is perfectly harmless.

Strel: And anyway, he's my friend—what, you don't want me to finally have friends?? Huh??

Lauriam: Ugh. Fine! But the second he does anything fishy I'm slicing his head off with my scythe.

Strel: Okay. <3

Xehanort: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "OKAY. <3"???

[uhshsmsmaka]

Kin list because I keep forgetting and I wanna keep it written so I remember

giving the biggest “please be my friend ur so cool please please please please” to whoever knows all of these characters

But I’ll say them here anyway, in order from the top left going right.

Mikey - rottmnt

SCP-035 - SCP Foundation

Tawnypelt - Warriors

Ennard - FNAF Sister Location

Dr. Iceberg - SCP Foundation

Moxxie - Helluva Boss

Space Kid - Camp Camp

Phone Guy - FNAF 1 (I think?? I never played the games..)

Phillip Graves - Call of Duty Modern Warfare (reboot)

uhhh idk if I label or spelt that right. I hope I did. That’d be kinda embarrassing if I didn’t lol..

———— why I kin them ig.

btw some stuff is headcanons like so and so being lgbtq and Graves having daddy issues

Mikey ROTTMNT- hell, there’s a lot of reasons.. it’s like… really personal with me lol

4th child, plus youngest. 3 older brothers and often gets left out, or brushed off from being involved. + aro/ace spec.

+ orange theme buddy agh I love u ur so pretty 💛💛

+ ADHD

SCP-035 - hmm.

Wants to watch the world burn, and is here for a good time and is really opportunistic with people, and often forms bonds with people for what they can give him… I’m a bad person I know. I’m trying to change.

+ Latin hehe

+ a lot of people really like him when they first meet, and learn the longer they spend with him, the worse he gets.

Tawnypelt - I’ll be honest, I don’t know much about her bc I didn’t read the 2nd arc, but from what I get, she seems to have struggled with gaining her own identity and being seen as someone other than a clone in her family. I struggle with people only knowing me for my brothers so I relate to her for this.

Also idk her leaving Thunderclan, despite her family, friends, and everything she knows and it being genuinely a good place she is comfortable and happy with— to Shadowclan so she can start a new life just touches me personally.

I don’t want to stay here. It’s not bad here, and everyone I love is here, but I don’t feel like I belong here, and I relate to her for it.

Ennard - yeah.. no, I got nothing. Idk why but he’s just like me fr.

Dr. Iceberg - HE’S AN ASSHOLE!!! I’m an asshole!!! Easily entertained, and doesn’t think of others that much, or the consequences of his actions. + mentally ill

+ bad taste in men

+ probably American with a small fraction of his ethnicity from Europe.

Moxxie - Daddy Issues. shit on by everyone. Underestimated kinda I guess???… and mixed morals. Often really polite— or at least is perceived to be, and is a thinker. Can go absolutely feral if necessary.

+ Italian I guess lmfao

+ short- ish..

+ adults and some older kids shall be referred to as ‘sir’ and ‘ma’am’

Space Kid - he likes space. What can I say?

He’s so silly. A lot of the actions and stuff he does feels like stuff I would have done/do.

+ brown hair

Phone Guy - tries to help and probably fails. Hey, he’s trying.

Phillip Graves - Daddy issues. I also headcanon his dad was in the military and he moved around a lot and lived throughout the US, so he’s fairly decent at adapting to different places, and tolerate as hell. “It is what it is” mentality about most everything out of his control.

Finds that one person and looks up to them, and gets really clingy and obsessed with them. Doesn’t show it of course, but in his head he wants to impress them and please them in every way possible. *cough, Shepherd, cough cough*

(I met a lotta people I hyperfixated on giving away everything to make them happy. We’re just casual friends now. Except for that one. She was mean as hell to me. We still meet occasionally tho.)

Outside of headcanons, his personality and the way he acts is just very familiar and relatable to me.

+ American (wtf is a kilometer🦅🫡🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅💥🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸)

+ makes shitty jokes no one laughs at

[fangaminghell]

Okay the Suraya post.

In general, I've been thinking about replaying reborn whenever the new update drops, to get a better understanding of my ocs. I did it with Rejuv, i'm doing it with Deso, and honestly, with how i've felt about my reborn trio, i gotta do it with Reborn. And part of that re-examination of my ocs is trying to understand their arcs. And for Suraya, I felt she didn't really have much.

And by that I mean, unlike Leo or Blair, I felt she didn't exactly have standout moments for her character to grow. Leo has several moments as the main protag, Blair has everything regarding xyr sibling, the reconstruction of reborn city, xem opening up xyr heart again. Suraya...doesn't get much like that. The Big Thing she gets is literally being taken out of the plot and into the void. Sure, it comes as a big character change for her but like. Her big moment is her getting taken out of the plot? Really?

My goal is to fix that. Make her more than the caring one, or the one that worries over her brother. Suraya is more than that, and honestly, i don't think even she realizes that.

After talking about it with a friend on discord ( hi pink), I realized Suraya's arc theme could be about her finding her own identity. Outside of her status. Outside of her family. Outside of Leo. Who is she, anyway?

Suraya Indu Joshi has had her life planned out for her from the jump. She was the oldest, and thus set up to inherent the family wealth and business. She was an older sister with neglectful parents, so she became the parent for Leo at a young age. Her life is as busy as it gets, between school, aura training, dealing with fellow upperclassmen in general- she hardly if ever gets time for herself. Truly for herself, cause if she's not doing any of that, she's trying to look after Leo. At most, she gets her own freedom in her secret relationships with other women, but those are often short lived due to her already busy life. And for a long time, Suruya never fully questioned this. She never asked herself what she wanted. Mainly because she was genuinely happy and proud with what she was doing! She loved being and aura wielder, she loved learning about law, she was proud to keep her family legacy alive.

But who is Suraya Indu Joshi? She does not know. She will not for a while.

Throughout Reborn, Suraya's biggest focus is Leo. She went after him when he ran away, she stayed with him to make sure he would be okay, her entire motivation was her darling little brother. And this is not a bad thing by any means! That's her brother, of course she would care. But when will it ever just be Suraya?

Seeing Leo grow throughout Reborn. Seeing him grow beyond his family name, his status, his former self, growing beyond her made Suraya feel....conflicted. She was proud, of course. Look at her little brother go. But then it was the realization that Leo....doesn't need her anymore. She no longer has to be his parent- she can simply be his sister. Someone who is there, but not the parent. And that....made her feel a bit empty? Because when you spend all of your time and energy focusing on one person, when that person doesn't need you in the way things used to be....what can you do? What can she do?

I feel like Suraya kinda starts getting a bit existential, because one of her main roles is getting taken away from her, and she kinda has to sit there and think " now what. what do i do". And that is when the Void Incident happens. And honestly? Outside of the void monsters? Possibly the best thing for Suraya. Because it's only then where she is completely alone. Alone with her thoughts, alone with herself to just think about herself. Of course, her goal is to get back to Leo and her friends, but that's gonna take a fucking while,so why not reflect on her life, hm? Do something that she was too busy to do and finally try and understand herself. So when she comes out of the void, she kinda feels like someone new, but still the same. Her growth doesn't even stop there, because I think after everything is said and done, and Suraya knows things will be okay...I think she travels on her own for a while. She still has a lot to learn about herself, and she needs to take that journey alone. Pink suggested that she writes in a diary about her journey and honestly that's a really good idea.

One last thing bc I am getting tired: for this reason, I now see Suraya x Saphira as a slow burn. As in there's clearly some feelings popping up, but the situation they find themselves in + both not being mentally ready for a relationship, they kinda just don't immediately get together by the end of the post game, as neither are really ready for a relationship. This isn't a "wait for me" scenario- i fully believe their feelings for each other will waver over time, especially with the both of them picking themselves up from scratch. But! They'll soon reach a point in their lives, in which they both go " hey. wanna go out sometime".

Okay that was a lot of words, and i'm tired, goodbye-

[torialefay]

hiya! so i wanted to pop in because of the whole changbin exclusionist writer thing. i'm not a writer but i do still feel like there's some things i wanna say about this whole situation.

i'm gonna put a disclaimer here just to say that i don't have that many details on what exactly this person writes or says. this goes out to anyone who excludes one of the members just because you don't find them attractive

personally, i'm attracted to all the members except for changbin and seungmin. but that doesn't mean that i love them any less. i read that the author said something along the lines of "oh, i just don't want him to rail me like the others haha" and yeah, that's completely okay, but what isn't okay is saying that you're a stay and are ot8 when you aren't.

these guys, all of them, deserve the world and they've worked their asses off to be where they are today. so yeah. it's genuinely completely valid if you don't feel attracted to one, multiple or any of the members. but that doesn't give you the right to be an asshole. do you really think that the other members would like what you're doing? that they want to see one of their best friends, their family, be put down like this time and time again?

tldr; if you hate on any of the members just because you don't find them attractive, go outside and touch some grass ffs

i truly agree with this. it baffles my mind to think that this is normal in some people's heads.

like i genuinely could not IMAGINE a world in which i was like "yeah im just not gonna write for him bc i don't know him like that since i'm not attracted to him & don't pay attention to him." like that truly takes some balls that i would be MORTIFIED to show fr.

i think everyone has those members that they love & adore, but that they don't necessarily think of in any sort of sexual way and that is completely FINE. completely NORMAL. for example, although innie is turning into a v manly toast, he is my baby sister's age, so it can be hard for me to see him that way sometimes. like that's a baby for real, you know??? even though he's not even 2 years younger so it's kinda stupid 😭 just that mental block kinda thing from seeing people his age that i've always put into a "too young" category my whole life. but at the same time, i can appreciate the fact that he is objectively grown & handsome & has so much sex appeal. and i genuinely think the world of him and know that he should be included in what i write... bc he is inherently just as sexy as the other members & just because i have biases, it doesn't take away from that fact. and REGARDLESS, i appreciate him in stray kids. never in a million years would i leave him out.

it's completely normal to have biases & members you're more attracted to than others. & if you don't feel comfortable writing for them *sexually*, then okay, wtv do your thing. but to not include them AT ALL (even in a non-sexual way) in a post including everyone else in skz? i'm sorry, but it really does scream having no respect for them in the group. also screams that you don't actually give a fuck about them as individuals, but rather this is just about you wanting to fuck them. if you don't appreciate bin & don't write for him at all bc you don't wanna fuck him, then you're not ot8. just say that. do your thing, but own up to it being shallow. aint never heard a bitch say anything negative ab bin's personality or talent, so that sure as hell is NOT why you don't wanna write ab him 😭😂 i mean unless you really don't jive w his personality... which is all i have to know really lol.

point blank: just because you do not find someone attractive does not make them "less-than", nor does it support why you couldn't write for them in a non-sexual way. if it's superficial for you, then it's superficial for you & i'm sure there will still be people that support that. just don't go acting like it's "i just don't really know him" when you've had just as much exposure to him as the others. don't make lame-ass excuses.

like imagine being in your own idol group that means so much to you. your fans are your livelihood & mean the absolute world to you. you love them more than anything else and center so much of your life around giving them what you think they'd want. but then you see stuff like this. posts including all of your members EXCEPT for you. how would you feel? would you feel appreciated at all? left out simply because you're not as "sexually attractive" as the other members? literally not even ACKNOWLEDGED until pressed about it.

but people grow up and learn that saying "this community wasn't what i thought it would be" when everyone is collectively telling you that you're problematic... hopefully to god at some point you'd believe them. it's not everyone else's fault that most people are ot8 & you're not, thus not supporting your work. sorry if you expected a bunch of people who love changbin to suddenly not give a fuck, but it's quite the opposite 🫶🏼

[iammissingautumn]

Stan marsh headcanons gO

this isn’t a death threat!!!

ummm i lovb him.

- Stanley is a dog boy, he loves going jogging with Sparky and taking him out and playing with him

- Stan can never not be in love with Kyle

- I’m always a sucker for Stan’s Bad With Feelings, unintentionally leading Kyle on / being inconsiderate with his feelings

- stan has an incredibly complicated relationship with shelly. i don’t think she would ever see herself in the wrong explicitly and it would make Stan feel rlly shitty.

- I do think that Stans perfect life is without his dad and sister. there is too much baggage there. his last year of highschool r a blessing bc of this.

- okie stanie is like. he is a bit oblivious while also being aware of his feelings. so he knows he loves Kyle bc he’s his best friend but he doesn’t know He Loves Kyle. i wasn’t gonna make this about style but it’s too easy.

- AND FUCK JOCK STAN. (/ref) i’m like. fine with jock stan. whatever 🙄. but i think the sports he’s played isn’t bc he’s a sports lover and i think it would only really harm him because he’d be backed into a bigger corner of fulfilling this idea of male masculinity. And I also think he grows to really dislike that culture and there’s a lot of weight in that in sports. tbh ppl genuinely thinking jock stan is good for him and accurate kinda. surprise me? but maybe i just haven’t seen any good takes. but maybe that’s also telling about the take in itself! idk. moots feel free to make me based about this with ur takes

- hello welcome to musician stan takes. he lovbs playing guitar and singing. He loves singing to his friends while playing his guitar. he loves decorating the thing. he loves writing songs but i think he mostly keeps it a secret. he does daydream about crowd surfing tho.

-he’s such a loser. is this an hc. probably not. again a popular Stan doesn’t make sense to me. he’s got his friends and the ppl who are just outside of that that he knows and they’re cool with. but any like. movie idea of a popular kid just doesn’t seem like him. he’s a volatile loser.

- he/they emo Stan………. that’s all

- he’d have a field day with weed. i think he had a moment when he thought alcohol could fix him and then he tried weed and forgor about that idea.

- Stan has big gay energy. kinda in love with everyone he’s ever met. kinda confused about how he feels things. i could project my aro aplatonic alterous stuff onto him but the world isn’t ready for that hot take and i get enough mean shit about it

[planerot]

For Mater: 🧸👻🎶👽🦾💔🪢🔪💄😺😭🖕😬📓🍫

(I know it’s a lot, but I really like Mater. Unfortunately, I can’t seem to find any headcanons about him.)

(Sorry it took a bit to get to this, I don't mind how many headcanons you want, I fully agree that Mater gets 0 attention from the fandom :(. A lot of these ones are slightly inspired by the Mater's Tall Tales shorts, so have fun seeing if you can pick out which ones are inspired by which short.)

🧸: I'm pretty sure it's canon that Mater has a big family, (don't quote me on that, it's been a hot second since I've rewatched all three movies), so I imagine that as a kid he would spend a lot of summers travelling out to family reunions and birthday parties and other various events with his extended family.

👻: I think Mater has a fear of abandonment. He knows he can be kind of annoying sometimes and after the events of Cars 2, he especially worries he might accidentally push away those he cares about.

🎶: He's actually a massive fan of rock, punk, metal and heavy metal music. Most people never peg him as the type to enjoy that kind of stuff, but the second any song from those genres comes on, regardless of it's from one of the most famous bands ever or some super obscure indie group, Mater is able to sing along word for word.

👽: There's a part of Mater that genuinely believes in the supernatural/cryptic. He knows all the ghost/alien/cryptid stories and will happily tell anyone who asks about them will 100% sincerity. He is really good at campfire stories because of this, even those not easily spooked can get a shiver up their spine when Mater tells his spooky stories

🦾: In canon, it's been shown that rusty cars literally fall apart, so I feel Mater has some chronic pain because his axles and other such parts are rusted. My headcanon is that rust kinda functions like some mix between a skin condition and a degenerative physical disability. He sometimes just fully breaks down, having to be hauled over to Doc's clinic to be repaired after some part of him just got to rusty and fell apart. It feels a bit ironic that the tow truck needs to be towed around when he breaks down, but the town never makes him feel bad about it. I also headcanon him as autistic. No real reason, hust vibes.

💔: Mater sometimes gets very jealous of Lightning. He loves his bets friend, but it also sometimes feels like he gets sidelined or not given any appreciation compared to his friend. Lightning is constantly in the spotlight, always winning races, getting national attention and having a horde of very loyal fans. Sometimes, it feels like Mater is the stupider of the two, the lesser of the two. Lightning seems to be able to do everything with ease, meanwhile Mater sometimes struggles to even do his job as a tow truck properly. They both are very supportive of each other, but Mater can feel jealous of his best friend, especially when they're fighting.

🪢: Mater has a big extended family! Multiple cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents and other such family members. His close family, though, is actually pretty small. Just him, his mother, his father, and his sister Mato. Him and his sister are very competitive with each other to the point that outsiders may see the two as actively hating each other.

🔪: Mater's way of fighting is to use his weight and hope that works. He isn't refined at all, just kind of hoping if he hits something hard enough it'll work out. He usually isn't the type to pick a fight though, so it means he's pretty outmatched if he faces against someone who actually knows what they're doing.

💄: A human Mater would be pretty tall and chubby. He'd always be a bit dirty, wearing the same pair of overalls and boots everyday, and he'd probably have a mullet in some shape or form. He'd have a very huggable kind of vibe to him.

😺: Mater likes to feed the local pigeons and crows. (Even though he really probably shouldn't). He feeds them seeds and corn, never enough to make them dependent on him for food, but enough that they recognize his face and love to stop by for a treat.

😭: I feel likes the entire plot of Cars 2 is the worst thing that happened to Mater. Imagine going on a fun little trip with your best friend only to end up roped in a life or death spy thriller involving a mafia plot to discredit alternative fuel that has already killed 2 PROFESSIONAL SPIES. Also you and your bestie are fighting. Like I would've imploded from fear, props to Mater for doing all that with a smile on his face.

🖕: Mater gets very fidgety when he's mad. He'll pace and gesture and just overall be very jumpy. It does take a lot to get him actually angry though since he's just very carefree and happy go lucky, a lot of social cues just flying over his head, especially if it's hidden in sarcasm.

😬: He once broke one of Sally's vases and has never admitted to it. He was in the cozy cone lobby looking for her, backed up to far, and completely shattered the thing. He just kind of brushed it in a corner and drove away because he didn't want her to be mad. To this day she has no idea who did it.

📓: He collects cool rocks. He'll drive around town looking for cool pebbles/rocks and brings the back to his place once he finds one he likes. He has a pretty large collection and some of them are actually really cool, weird rocks and the rest are just normal rocks he thought were nice.

🍫: I think Mater would be a very big fan of salty foods and junk food. Stuff like beef jerky, chips, chocolate, pickled food, ice cream, etc. He isn't picky though and will eat basically all food given to him regardless of quality or actual nutrition.

[potato-mozzarellaa]

Sibling bond

One shot that mostly focuses on the relationship between Issei Matsukawa and his siblings

Everything happens in my magic AU where Hanamaki is an Immortal magic spirit and possesses the ability to shape-shift

Word count: 8,497

Warnings: blood, wounds, general violence, and mentions of rape

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It was a normal day at the Matsukawa household. Issei was spending time with his siblings, watching over them while their mother was at work. He didn't mind that, at this point, he was used to this. He was the oldest, and he was the only one who could take care of them as their mother was absent, doing whatever she could to gain money. Since their father died, it was the only way. No one could help them, grandparents from his mother's side were already dead and grandparents from his father's side lived on a different continent and they had their problems.

He sighed quietly, changing his on the armchair and scrolling through Instagram. Right now, he had nothing better to do. His siblings were in their rooms, doing god knows what. Thankfully, they were old enough to mostly take care of themselves, but they still couldn't stay alone for long. Well, maybe his sister could, but it would still be a little unsafe. Especially if she had to stay with their little brother. He was barely ten. Leaving a moody fifteen-year-old with a ten-year-old kid didn't sound like a safe idea at all. But watching over them didn't bother him, it was a natural habit for him, he was the oldest, and he had to protect them from all the dangers of the world. He wouldn't forgive himself if something happened to any of his little siblings. If it happened, it would be his fault.

This day was extremely elongating. He felt like each minute was an hour. It was annoying, but he had to get through it.

He looked outside. It was slowly getting dark, which was good. It meant that at least his little brother would be going to sleep, and he would be able to ignore any responsibilities he would have otherwise. Because his sister didn't want much of his help. She needed him most when she wanted to reach something that was put too high for her. That's the plus of being tall. It was also useful when his siblings were fighting over something. He could just pick it up and just put his arm high enough so they couldn't reach it. It was kinda mean, but that's just what siblings do. They are annoying. He sometimes wondered if his mother had a favorite child because there's always one favorite. It was probably his little brother. He was the youngest, so that would make sense.

Suddenly, he heard footsteps on the stairs. He looked up from his phone and saw his sister. She emerged from her cave. That was probably the second time he had seen her in the whole day. Eh. That's still better than when they haven't seen each other in three days in a row because they kept hiding in their rooms and going out at different times. That was a funny situation. Or when he thought that his sister was in her room when, in fact, she was at her friend's house for two days. And he had no idea about that, for the whole time, he thought that she was in her room. He only realized that when she came back. That was funny, too. But it is what it is. He got used to that. And there was no reason for him to try to change that. His sister had her own life and didn't need his attention as much as she did when they were younger.

He decided to be an annoying bastard and he threw a pillow straight at her head. She did not like that, and she definitely wasn't in a good mood. Normally, she would just throw it back at him, and they would play fight for a few minutes. This time, it was different. She looked genuinely angry at him. That was weird. And surprising.

"What's wrong?" He asked, a little confused by her reaction.

"That's none of your business." She answered harshly and threw the pillow back at his head. Afterward, she turned around, intending to go back to her room. But she was stopped by her brother. He didn't want to force her into telling him what was bothering her, but it was never normal for her to be this angry. And she always wanted to talk with him about different problems they had.

"I just want to know what's bothering you," he tried to stay calm. More anger wasn't needed. And right now, he was doing a good job of keeping his emotions in control. Mayako tried to push him away, which wasn't easy to do as he was much taller and stronger than her.

"Fuck off! I don't need your attention!" She was mad, and Issei was getting the idea that his sister might be mad at him. It was weird. They always had a fairly good relationship with each other. It was the first time when she got this mad.

"What is your problem?!" He didn't want to get angry but it was getting hard for him to stay calm. They shouldn't be arguing. Especially not when their little brother was home and could see everything.

"You are my problem! Without you, everything would be much better!" She screamed at him and left, shutting the front door behind her. Now that hurt. Her words cut deeper than steel.

Issei took a deep breath trying to calm himself. He was trying to convince himself that she didn't mean that and that she was just angry at something else.

He had to find her and get her back home. It was not safe to walk around alone at this time. Especially for a girl her age. Who knows what will happen to her? He did not want to think about all the bad things that can happen.

He quickly called Oikawa, he was the first person that came to his mind now. He quickly explained to him what happened and asked if he could come and watch over his little brother. Fortunately, he agreed. The dark-haired teen quickly hung up and went upstairs into his brother's room. He was still awake.

"Hey, why aren't you asleep yet?" He asked quietly, not wanting to worry him.

"I couldn't sleep, why were you screaming?" He asked, concern filling his big eyes, he shouldn't be worrying about that now.

"It's nothing important, don't worry about it" He smiled slightly. "I need to go out for a while, Oikawa will be here soon so you won't be alone, okay?" His little brother nodded. He gently ruffled his fluffy hair and turned off his light. He enjoyed taking care of him, it was a nice exception from school and volleyball.

He quickly walked down the stairs and put on his shoes. He had his coat in his hands if it was going to be colder. He didn't know when he'll be back.

Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long for Oikawa, he quickly thanked him for staying and keeping his brother company and he quickly left to search for his sister.

He hoped that he won't be there too late.

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Issei was walking through the streets for an hour and he was getting really nervous. This shouldn't be happening. His sister should be safe at home and not god knows where. It was all his fault, he should just keep quiet and not try to get information out of her.

He sighed anxiously turning towards the park. He was running out of ideas on where his sister might be, he tried contacting her friends that he knew off to ask if they know anything about his sister's whereabouts. But unfortunately, they all knew nothing.

He walked through the park, looking around, trying to see if there are any signs that his sister is somewhere there.

After a few minutes of walking, he saw something. A hand on the ground between the bushes. His blood run cold, he hoped that it was just a random person, just a stranger. But after coming closer he was in shock and he couldn't believe his eyes.

It was his sister.

She was unconscious. Her clothes were all thorned apart, exposing her skin, blood, and bruises covering her arms and legs. Some blood running down her nose. Cuts and marks that should not be on her body ever. He knew what happened. It was clear as the blue sky on a day without clouds. He was furious and worried at the same time. He was furious at what monster dared to hurt his little sister in this way and worried for her well-being.

He covered her mostly naked body with his coat and picked her up as gently as he could. Issei knew that he had to get her to the hospital as quickly as possible. It was starting to get cold. And his coat wouldn't be enough to keep her warm now. Fortunately, the hospital was not far away.

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When he got there he immediately called his mother to let her know what happened. She needed to come to the hospital.

After the doctors examined his sister all of Issei's suspects in what had happened in the park were confirmed. His little sister was brutally raped. He was furious. He needed to find the bastard who dared to lay his finger on Mayako and make him pay. He didn't care about any consequences he can have. This bastard needed to pay for what he had done. And it was all his fault. If he wasn't there then his sister wouldn't leave and nothing would've happened to her.

It was his fault. His fault. His fault. His fault. His fault.

Those words were playing in his head on repeat. He was guilty of this situation. He was the reason why Mayako left and got hurt.

God knows what else could have happened. Someone could've kidnapped her and taken her to another country. She could've been killed. He could've lost her forever. His precious little sister. And it would be only his fault. What brother is he if he can't protect her?

He failed her, he failed his whole family. What brother doesn't protect his sister? What brother fails at protecting his sister? His baby sister? The second most important woman in his life?

The only way he could redeem himself is to find the guy who hurt her and make him pay. Consequences will come later. Now the only thing that counted was finding this bastard.

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Finding this guy was surprisingly easy. And he didn't even deny his actions. He admitted to raping his little sister, and he had the audacity to say that he would do it again. Issei couldn't hold himself back. He was furious. This bastard hurt his sister and said that he would do it again. He was not a human. He was just a monster that didn't deserve to live.

It all happened so fast. That knife was just so close. And his throat was at the reach of the blade. Blood was everywhere. Issei had his hands and clothes covered in the blood of the man he just killed. He had to get rid of the body and all the traces of the murder that just happened. There was only one person that could've helped him with it.

His most precious boyfriend, who possessed magical abilities. It was life-saving at this moment.

He not only got rid of the body but also of all the traces of the murder and the fact that Issei had anything to do with it.

He was also furious at what happened to Mayako. Something like this shouldn't have happened. He knew that he would do anything to protect his sisters from the threat of being raped. And deleting one rapist from the world was helpful.

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Matsukawa was spending all of his free time at the hospital by his sister's side. He needed to be there for her. He was constantly apologizing for what had happened. He couldn't forgive himself for not stopping her when she wanted to leave and not finding her fast enough.

He was not looking good. Stress was getting to him. He was afraid that this situation will repeat and once again he won't be able to save his little sister. And each time he tried to sleep, after closing his eyes he saw her body once again, wounds covering her thighs and arms. Blood and bruises. Thorned clothes. Everything. He couldn't even imagine how much pain she must've suffered, poor little girl. He felt awful just by the mere thought of this situation.

It was his fault, and he knew that. No matter how hard Mayako tried to explain to him that it was not his fault, he wouldn't listen. He just couldn't stop the guilt. Even if deep inside he knew that it was not his fault and it just happened. He couldn't accept it.

As the older brother, it was his responsibility to protect her and their brother. And he failed at it. He didn't protect her. He didn't save her. He failed at his job. He failed his sister. He failed his dead father. He failed his whole family. He failed his friends. He failed everyone. He was a terrible son, brother, friend. What was his purpose in life if he couldn't make sure that his little siblings were safe?

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After a few days, Mayako was released from the hospital. Issei took it upon himself to never let her get hurt again. And definitely not like that. It was horrific. This man took away something that should be her choice. He was still furious, even though he knew that the man who did it was dead.

He was sitting on the bed in his room. It was already late but he couldn't sleep. So he was sitting. Looking up at the ceiling. It was making it easier for him to collect his thoughts. He sighed deeply. He was afraid that someday this situation may repeat, and once again, he won't be there to protect his baby sister.

Suddenly, someone knocked on his door. It was Mayako. She slowly went into his room.

"Can we talk?" He didn't even hesitate and nodded. He knew that it must be hard for her. She was hurt in an awful way. The wounds were not only physical but also psychical.

She walked over to the bed and sat down beside her brother. She put her head on his chest, hiding from the light that Issei had turned on. He gently hugged her.

"I can't sleep. Every time I try to, I see h-his face. A-and everything j-just keeps repeating," she sobbed quietly. Issei started gently rubbing her back, trying to comfort her.

"Hey... it's okay now, I won't let anyone hurt you again, I promise..." he whispered, hugging her closer, gently swaying her from side to side. He wanted to make her feel better, but he knew that it was going to be hard. He hoped that if he was there with her, she would feel safer, and it would be easier for her to sleep. Fortunately, it worked.

Poor thing, she must've been exhausted. It was obvious that she wasn't sleeping well. Not if he was any better, but he was not important now. The only person whose well-being was important now was his sister. And he did not intend on failing her again.

Just as he was intending to sleep as well someone opened the door. It was his little brother.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" He whispered he didn't want to wake up his sister.

"I couldn't sleep" he was looking at Issei with those big blue eyes of his. Issei knew exactly what he wanted, but how could say no to those eyes?

"Only today" he sighed and waited till his brother will come over to the bed. He turned off the light afterward.

Situations like this weren't happening often. As his siblings were already old enough to sleep alone. Nonetheless, he missed times when they were younger and were sleeping, all tangled, trying to fit under one blanket.

That was always fun, although he was always ending pushed away. But he didn't mind that. He enjoyed seeing his siblings happy. He wanted to protect them at all costs.

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A month has passed since the accident. Mayako was getting better each day. And she even normally went back to school. Everything was slowly coming back to being peaceful. Because nothing will be normal again. Not when everyone around could be a threat to his sibling's safety.

Matsukawa became careful when it came to people around. He was analyzing everything he could see around him, making sure that nothing bad happened again. He wouldn't forgive himself if any of his siblings got hurt again. It was his job to protect them, and he couldn't fail again. He slowly started distancing himself from his friends. He wanted to pay as much attention as possible to make sure that his siblings were safe. He wasn't able to see that it was starting to be annoying instead of helpful.

Mayako was annoyed at him and wanted to tell him to stop, but she understood where his precautions were coming from and she stayed quiet. And who knows, maybe someday the fact that he always seems to be close will be helpful. But she couldn't help but wonder how was he managing to always be close if he had his school and also volleyball practice. It was one big mystery. And it was probably going to remain that way.

She sighed walking out of her school, she guessed that her brother is probably somewhere close already. His commitment was truly incredible. She wondered what would he do if she ever got into a relationship. He would probably already have a complete list of all the things that this person did in their whole life and also an essay explaining if this person is good to date or not. That wouldn't surprise her. He is the kind of person that would do something like this.

Issei was carefully watching his sister from a distance. He knew that stalking her wasn't exactly the best way of keeping her safe but this way he at least knew that she is safe. And as long as she won't notice him everything should be fine. And who knows, maybe his presence there will save her life someday.

And it looked like he was right.

A suspicious-looking person with a hood was slowly approaching his sister. And a white van nearby. He had to get closer to her, to be able to save her if it'll be needed.

The person wanted to catch his sister. But he was already close enough and stopped them from doing that. This person was a little stronger than him, and a little taller too. But he could hold them off for long enough.

"Run and don't look back!" He yelled to his sister. Fortunately, she listened and he hoped that he won't have to worry about her getting caught. He tried to get out and run away too. But then he felt a sting near his neck. A needle.

And soon the world went dark.

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He woke up with an extreme headache. And he had no idea what he was doing earlier. And why he woke up just now? Hmm. He must've been really tired if he remembers nothing from the time before he went to sleep.

"Look who finally woke up" Wait-

He looked around. That was not his room. That wasn't any room that he knew about. And those weren't people that he knew. Where was he?!

"Don't worry, we're gonna keep you alive. For now." He tried to get up. He was tied to a chair. The most he could do was probably fall on the floor with that chair. Which would not be comfortable. Or nice. He had to wait and see what they'll do with him. The only thing he could believe in was that they won't kill him.

Issei started remembering events from before everything went black. His sister. They intended to kidnap her. He saved her. Or at least that's what he knew. They could've gone back for her. She could've been somewhere there, also as a prisoner. He hoped that she did manage to escape. The hope that she was safe was all he had.

He started wondering what do they want from him. Right now it looked like they want to keep him alive. But how long would that last? From what this one person was saying it looked like at some point they will kill him. And that didn't sound like something he wanted to happen. Not now at least. Maybe in a few years. When he will have university to worry about. Yes, that's the perfect time to die. Then no one will say that he achieved nothing in life, his possible achievements would be simply prevented from happening by his death. Yes, this is a good plan for life, or rather, a good plan for death.

His trail of thought was stopped by one of his kidnappers pointing a gun at him. Well, that's not a nice thing to do.

"Why can't we kill him now?" The person asked.

"Organs are better fresh" Excuse me what? Why organs? What organs? I fucking hope that musical ones- "But only internal ones are important, the rest can be violated" What. Well, this is definitely not a nice thing to do.

People around him took out their knives. That wasn't going to end well.

But at least his sister was safe. That's what's important. He may die but at least he saved his sister from this fate. Issei didn't care about how this was going to end for him as long as his little sister was going to live. Maybe that was stupid at this moment when he was captured by the threat of death and should care about his survival. But he just couldn't. It wouldn't change anything. He was outnumbered and tied up. He wouldn't even be able to defend himself. He could at least think about his sister. She was much more important for him that the fact that he may die.

Maybe his death would redeem his mistake of letting his baby sister get brutally hurt.

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He knew what they were now. Sadists. They wanted to hurt him. They wanted him to feel pain. Selling his organs and possibly other body parts on the black market was just a way to get rid of his body after he dies. They cared more about the fact that he will be tortured. That he will feel pain.

He had cuts all over his arms. That'll exclude him from any near practice. If he gets out alive. But they weren't stopping on just cutting him. They were doing it slowly, playing around with different knives, his wounds were already looking terrible, but he wasn't bleeding a lot. Most of the wounds were superficial. It hurt a lot. But he was repeatedly saying to himself that it was all for his sister. She's safe. She doesn't have to suffer this. He's doing it for her. It helped him get through it all. And also the memory of his boyfriend, and their friends. They were all keeping him conscious. The thought that he'll get out and see them all again. That they'll play on the same court again. Maybe finally win against Shiratorizawa and go on to nationals. Maybe this would finally happen. It would be nice. To play at such a big tournament. Maybe even they could win there. Or at least get somewhere high. But those were just dreams that would probably never become reality. Especially if he was going to die.

Suddenly they stopped cutting him and started walking away.

"Oh, I was just getting comfortable" he probably shouldn't provoke them in any way. But if he was going to die anyway then what's the difference? A knife was put at his throat.

"We're not done with you yet. Believe that was just a little part of what we're going to do with you. You'll suffer till the end. We won't have mercy. Your death will be really slow and painful." The leader said to him and took away the knife. It still left a small cut on his neck. It was stinging a little. But compared to the rest of his wounds, it was pretty painless.

They left him alone. He finally had a chance to peacefully look around the room he was in. Oh wait, never mind, they turned off the light and he couldn't see shit.

He was left alone with his thoughts, slowly bleeding. It was going to be a long night? Day? He couldn't tell. There were no windows or a clock. He was alone in a completely dark room.

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Meanwhile, Mayako was panicking. If Issei wasn't trying to save her then he wouldn't get kidnapped. It was all because that one night she decided to run away and now he was feeling guilty because someone decided to assault her. None of this should be happening. They were just teenagers. They should be worrying about school and not about each other's safety. She was nervously walking around her room. She was worried that something bad might happen to her brother.

"Hey, you need to calm down. You won't help him by stressing yourself out" Hanamaki said, he was surprisingly calm.

"How can I calm down?! He got kidnapped because of me!" She yelled at him, and also quite forcefully grabbed him by his shoulders. He was not expecting this to happen. And there was a little bit of fear deep in his eyes. "Sorry... How can you be this calm?"

"I've learned to hide my emotions when the situation requires it. And I know that he's tough and he won't give up easily" he was trying to assure her that Issei is going to survive and that it was not her fault that he got kidnapped. He knew how much they both care about each other. They both would die if it meant that the other would survive. It was nice to see a bond like that.

He was also extremely worried and wanted to do something to help. But he knew that if he left Mayako unsupervised she would go, do something stupid, hurt herself, and then Mattsun would rip his skin off for allowing that to happen. And he would rather not take that risk. Angry Mattsun was not something he liked to see. Especially when he was the reason why Mattsun was angry. That happen two times already. And two times were enough for him. At least for the next three years. Or maybe ten. Nonetheless, he needs to watch over Mayako for Issei as long as he's gone. Someone needs to do that. And he was also close to her. Not as much as Issei was, obviously, but they were still pretty close. They were almost family after all. And he understood her, he also had an older sibling with a similar age difference and a younger sibling. They were like reflections in a mirror. They were different yet so similar. He always interpreted that as a sign that he and Issei were meant to be. Even if this thought didn't make the best sense, in his opinion it did make sense. They were similar. And he could feel that he was where he was supposed to be. It was his place in the world.

And he had to be a good future sibling-in-law.

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Issei tiredly opened his eyes. He must've passed out at some point. Or he just went to sleep? He had no idea. The fact that he lost some blood must've messed in his head. That wasn't important at the moment.

His kidnappers were back. Just amazing. And his back was starting to hurt from sitting in the same position for so long. It was annoying. And he started losing a little bit of feeling in his left knee. This was an interesting experience. It was like someone just took out his knee. Weird. His kidnappers must've didn't like the fact how distracted he looked, because someone did punch him in the face. And now he had a broken nose to the collection. That's just great. Now he definitely will be excluded from practice.

"Well that was mean" Was he aware of the fact that they can kill him at any moment? Yes. Did he care enough? No. The leader person looked angry. And he had no idea why. He was sitting very nicely in his chair. Not like he had any other option. He could try to escape but he didn't!

"Let's just cut him open now." Wait. No. He wasn't causing any problems! Well, maybe he was a little annoying but that didn't mean that they should kill him now! He had to find a way to escape somehow before they steal his kidneys without paying for them.

Something stopped them. A phone call? It was something to the leader. It must've been important because they left. That was good. He had a chance to escape. He only had to find a way how to do it as long as they are absent. Because he will lose if he will have to fight with them. Especially because he's wounded. And he hadn't eaten or drunk anything since before he got kidnapped. Which probably was at least a few days ago. Depends on how long he was unconscious. It wasn't important now. Important was that he had to find a way to escape. Which was going to be hard and complicated. Good thing that they left him alone. This was making it a little easier. But it didn't change the fact that he was tied to a chair. And he didn't know how much time he had. He needed to be quick. Because time was probably not on his side.

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"You're not going anywhere" Meanwhile Hanamaki was trying to stop Mayako from trying to find the kidnappers herself. If only she would be able to sit in one place without trying to do something stupid then maybe he would be able to go and try to find Issei on his own. But considering how she did not intend to listen to anyone, he couldn't leave her alone. Or rather. Leave her alone and later survive the consequences of his actions.

"I need to go and try to find him! He would've done the same for me!" She was trying to argue with him using any arguments that she could think of. Hanamaki sighed already getting tired of this conversation. How was Mattsun even capable of surviving with this 24/7?

"Even if you'd manage to find where he is the chances that you could've done something about that are almost equal to zero. You'd probably be outnumbered and had zero chances to even escape and you'd both be held captive by whoever those people are" Approach number whoever knows what to convince this stubborn person to stay inside and don't do anything stupid. Maybe this one will work.

"Not if I'd have help" This-

"No. Your brother would kill me for taking you there." He was slowly running out of arguments. And he doubted that she would listen to an argument 'because I said so'. "This is dangerous. I can survive that but you can't."

"Oh come on, I'll be careful"

"No. This is a stupid idea. You're staying here. I'm not going to risk your life." He hoped that she'll finally listen to him. He was immortal, he could get injured, but she could easily die there. And Mattsun would have his head for that.

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"How did that even happen..." Hanamaki was asking himself quietly.

"Shut up and look for him" He had no idea how Mayako managed to convince him to allow her to go. It was not supposed to happen and yet she did it. He was going to be so dead. His head was going to be hung on the wall. He fucking knew that. He was regretting half of his life decisions.

"I'm going to be so dead..." After that, he did shut up. They were both looking around from the sky. It wasn't the easiest to do but they hoped that they'll quickly find where the kidnappers are keeping Matsukawa. And that he was still alive.

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"Wake up!" He got punched in the face. That was not a nice way to wake up. And his nose started bleeding again. And all he did was pass out. Really. These people have no culture.

Right now he was barely staying conscious. There was a high chance that he had a concussion. And he was constantly losing blood, it was slow but still. Constantly losing blood was not good for him. He had to do something about but he had no chance of running away. He remembered he planned to escape when he was left alone but then something hit him and he was left unconscious.

"We need to take your organs now, but anyway, you won't live for long. We'll only shorter your suffering, or rather, make your death come faster and be more painful." The leader said, looking him in the eyes, holding his face up with his fingers. As Mattsun himself was barely able to keep his head up.

He was covered in cuts, bruises, and wounds. His nose was broken and bleeding. Blood was almost everywhere. He wasn't going to live for long. His time was coming to an end. And he couldn't do anything about it. The wounds made him weak. His head was spinning and he was seeing a few black dots. Death would only be a relief now.

His kidnappers were well prepared for this operation. They had masks and gloves. All needed surgical equipment. And special boxes to keep his organs in. And they didn't plan on using any type of anesthetics. It was going to be a painful operation. At least only for how long he was going to last through it. It wasn't the death that he would expect. Maybe cancer or something like that, but not some people stealing his organs. They could've at least live some money from selling them. His family could've used it. But they probably wouldn't want to do that.

They were just about to start the illegal surgery but something distracted them. A loud shrieking noise. He knew that sound. He was safe. Hanamaki found him. So maybe he will close his eyes just for a little bit...

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"An old empty, facility burned. It was a strange situation as the flames were bright pink and no one was supposed to be there. Police are investigating the situation but there seem to be no traces left. It is speculated that someone was held captive inside. It is unknown if the victim or the kidnappers survived. Stay tuned and watch our news for more information about this weird event." An unknown man turned off the TV. It was enough information for him. Those idiots were dead but maybe the target has died with them.

No matter what. His boss needed proof that he was dead. Simple speculation wasn't enough. They needed a body.

Who would have guessed that getting rid of one kid could be this hard? They needed to break him more. Then he would start making more notable mistakes. He would start panicking. And he would fall right into their hands.

They only needed to do something more. Just to push him over the edge. And then they would all be gone. Right as his supervisor wanted. But first, they needed proof that he was alive. And the rest would only be a formality. It was going to be easy now. Nothing should stay in their way anymore.

Those were some good news that was going to make his boss happy. And the fact that they lost some of their people, they still had the element of surprise. Because now no one expected that everything was planned. For them, it was just a line of awful coincidences. And it will be best if it stays this way. Just for a little longer. And then they will be able to strike.

×××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

Strong white light blinded him as soon as he opened his eyes. His head was spinning. And he felt kinda weird. The last thing he remembered was that he was kidnapped and those people wanted to sell his organs on the black market. Did he die? Was that the afterlife?

"Am I dead...?" He asked, mostly it was to himself as he wasn't expecting anyone to answer him.

"No, but you were close." A familiar voice right by his side. He weakly looked at its owner. His boyfriend was sitting there, faithfully waiting for him. It looked like he was sitting there for quite a long time. It was visible that he was tired and spending so much time in this position wasn't comfortable for him. He wondered how long was he unconscious. And how did Makki manage to convince the doctors to let him stay there after the visitation hours? Or maybe it would be better to stop questioning his actions and just accept the fact that he's stuck with him till he dies. But he didn't mind that. He loved his boyfriend and wanted to spend his life with him. "How do you feel?"

"Like I actually died and got resurrected but something failed" They both laughed at that. It was nice to laugh a little. Although it would be better if the settings were better. And not a hospital, hospitals were a little depressing. They smelled of death. And cleaning supplies. But it was still nice to be together. "How long was I gone?"

"Four days, we found you yesterday" Maybe he shouldn't have admitted to the fact that Mayako was there with but it was better to tell it now than later.

"Who was with you?" Hanamaki stepped away a little, for his safety.

"Your sister"

"What." He was angry. His sister could've gotten hurt again!

"You try to keep her in one place without doing anything reckless and stupid!" Takahiro was glad that Issei was currently unable to get up.

"You're lucky I can't move now..." Matsukawa laid back comfortably on the pillow. Or at least as comfortably as it was possible on the hospital bed.

Hanamaki sat back on the chair beside the bed. Just as he did that he got hit in the arm. Well, he probably deserved that.

"Where is she now?"

"I've managed to send her back home. Although telling her to do anything is worse than getting Oikawa to shut up about aliens"

"Welcome to my world"

They started joking around. Laughing quietly. They enjoyed that. Spending time like this was nice. It was a good way of forgetting about all the problems of the real world. But it couldn't be an escape forever.

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After he got released from the hospital he still wasn't functioning exactly the way he should. Although it wasn't that bad. He could do most of the things on his own. But there were situations where he needed someone to help him.

He was spending most of his time in his room, laying in bed. It was the most comfortable for him. Though he wished that he could stretch out his muscles after all the time on the chair. It was starting to hurt and he was having some cramps, mostly in his legs. That was extremely annoying. And he couldn't do much about it now. He needed to wait just a little while longer.

Although it was boring. He couldn't even play volleyball. And who knows what can happen on the team while he will be absent! Kyotani could start respecting Oikawa and he would miss it! It would be a disaster!

He sighed quietly and looked at the ceiling. He had nothing better to do with his time. So he was just laying in bed, staring at the ceiling. It was such an amazing way of passing time.

Not long later his sister decided to visit him. They talked about recent events. They both felt a little guilty of putting each other in danger. Maybe they weren't directly responsible for both accidents but they still felt like it was their fault. It must run in the family.

Alongside being stubborn and annoying.

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Issei and his brother went for a walk. It was a sunny and warm day, it would be a shame to waste it by sitting inside. And it was good for the teen. He was still recovering from the kidnapping but he was in a much better state. And walking around was helping him a lot.

His brother was walking a little in the front. But Issei was not taking his eyes off of him. He'd rather know what he's doing and if there's any danger getting near him. He didn't want anything to happen to him. He was far too young for that. He should experience as much of a peaceful childhood for as long as he can. He was still extremely young, at least in Issei's eyes. For him, he was still a little baby. And that would probably never change.

They were walking through the park. The same park where their sister had been assaulted. But that was in the past. Matsukawa intended to focus on the present now. That's what was important.

His brother was running around happily. Chasing a little pink butterfly. Huh. Matsukawa could swear that he had seen a pink butterfly when he was looking for his sister, and then one before he was kidnapped. What a strange coincidence.

Or what if it wasn't a coincidence? What if this butterfly was a warning? What if it meant that someone was going to get hurt? No. He was probably overthinking this. It was just a butterfly. A normal pink butterfly. It didn't mean anything. It was just a coincidence.

But what if it wasn't a coincidence?

He called his brother. They should come back home. He wasn't going to risk anything. And he could swear that he had seen something.

Too late.

A gunshot. Scream. Body hitting the ground. Blood everywhere.

Matsukawa frantically ran towards his brother. It was the first time he was running since he got out of the hospital, he shouldn't be running yet. But he didn't care. He had to save his brother. He could hear his heartbeat being extremely loud.

He kneeled on the ground beside his brother and gently took him in his arms.

"Issei... I'm scared..." He cried in pain. Tears flowed like waterfalls from his eyes. Blood covered his shirt and little arms. It was not stopping. There was only more blood everywhere.

"Hey... It's going to be okay... It's nothing serious..." He tried to stay calm and smile a little. Just to make his brother feel better. He saw that someone was already calling an ambulance. Everything was going to be okay. He tried to apply pressure to the wound. To somehow stop the bleeding.

"B-but what if it's serious...?"

"This is nothing serious, believe me, have I ever lied to you?" He was trying so hard to make his brother feel better. To get him to smile. He knew deep inside that it was extremely serious. But he couldn't tell the truth to his little brother. "I just need you to stay awake, okay? Let's treat it as a game, if you sleep you lose. Okay?"

"O-okay" That was good. He had to stay awake. As long as it was possible. Issei was terrified. But he was doing whatever he could just to keep his brother awake, and he tried to make him smile, just smile a little. He was trying everything he could to make him feel better.

He could hear the sirens getting closer.

"You just need to hold on a little while. And everything will be okay. You'll go on a trip with nice people"

"W-will you go with me?" He was getting weaker and weaker with each minute. He didn't have much time left. Issei was surprised that he was able to refrain from crying the whole time.

"I don't think that they'll let me go with you the whole time. I think I'm too old to be going on trips like this one. But I'll always be close. No matter what happens. I'll always be with you, over here" He pointed at his chest, where he had his little heart. It must've been ticklish as his brother laughed quietly. That was good. It was good that he was happy, even if it was just a little. "Later we can go get ice cream"

"B-but mom says that it's too early to have ice cream"

"Don't worry, I'll convince her this one time. But you must promise me that you're going to stay awake, okay?" He could see how his brother was close to losing his consciousness.

"O-okay" Issei could see how his brother was doing whatever he could, just to stay awake. He knew it was only tiring him more, but he had to stay awake. He had to stay with him.

The ambulance showed up and paramedics took his brother to the hospital. Now his life was in their hands. He could only hope that everything will be okay.

There was once again this pink butterfly. Now it was hard to think that it was just a coincidence. For him now, it meant pain.

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Issei was sitting on the chair, right outside the operating room. He had his head low, someone could say that he was praying considering how he had his hands. Who knows. And he was praying. To whatever god he could think of. He just wanted his brother to be okay. He couldn't lose him. He was just a baby. He had to live.

His mother and sister were waiting for the surgery to end. They were more visibly sad and worried. They were crying. Issei was looking more emotionless. He was dealing with everything inside. He didn't want to show directly how he was feeling. Someone had to be calm. Even if it just looked like that. He preferred to deal with everything inside.

He could see all memories that he had with his brother. They were playing around in his head, on repeat. He was terrified. Terrified of losing him. He didn't deserve that.

He must've been terrified too. He was taken alone by strangers into a weird room full of different scary equipment. And it was the last thing he had seen before getting anesthesia. It had to be terrifying for him. He was so young. He had to make it. He had to be okay. There were so many things that they always wanted to do. Like dressing him as a little alien and taking blurry pictures to send to Oikawa. It was supposed to be fun.

Suddenly a doctor went out of the corridor that lead to the operating room. It was the doctor that was supposed to be operating his brother. He didn't look happy.

"I'm sorry to inform you but unfortunately we couldn't stop the bleeding, it was too extensive."

No. No. No. No. No. No.

It couldn't be true. It just couldn't. It must've been a mistake. His brother was supposed to be okay. He was supposed to be alive. That's what Issei has been telling him. That's what was supposed to happen.

He was supposed to buy him ice cream.

His whole world just shattered. He could keep his emotions inside anymore. He broke completely. He couldn't hold back the tears anymore. He could hear footsteps getting closer. Someone hugged him. But he didn't care. He couldn't care. No matter how hard he was trying to hug this person or simply look up. He just couldn't. He was just frozen in place. Crying. Almost choking on his tears. He was a mess.

His brother was so little and young. He had his whole life left. And it was all taken away from him. If only they never went for that walk. If only they went somewhere else. Then he would be alive.

He could feel more people around, hugging him. His family was even smaller now. More broken. First his father, and now his little brother. Why was this happening to him? What have he done to deserve that? He was always a good person. Or at least he was trying to be. He was doing all that he could. He was always helping his siblings and his mom. He was always trying to find any job that would take him so he could help with getting money. So why was he suffering so much? Why him out of all the people on the whole planet? Was he really not enough? Maybe he wasn't doing enough? What was he supposed to do? He was already doing whatever he could.

Maybe it was just something wrong with him? Maybe he wasn't enough? After all, if he never argued with his sister that day, she would run away, and if he didn't took his brother for a walk, he would be alive. And they would go get those ice cream that he promised him. He failed. Once again. He not only lied to him but also broke his promise. It hurt. It was all painful. He could just feel it stinging him in the heart. It was extremely painful. But maybe he deserved that pain. If he was thinking more maybe nothing bad would've happened. And everyone would be happy and well.

And they would all go get ice cream.

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He was standing alone in the room where his brother's body was. He could say his last goodbye. It was so hard. Especially because he was promising him that everything was going to be okay. He lied to him.

"I'm sorry little one... I-I should've been more careful... We should've stayed home, and play the game like you wanted... It's all my fault... And I'm sorry that we couldn't have those ice creams..." he cried more as he was saying that. He was standing there, looking at the lifeless body of his little brother. If only he listened to him and stayed home. But he had to convince him to go out for a walk. It was all his fault. His fault only.

He failed him. He failed his mother. He failed his father. He failed his sister. He failed his friends. He failed everyone.

How could he live with the thought that he was the reason why his little brother died?

A pink butterfly flew right past the hospital window.

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[everything-is-as-it-was]

Damn I just love my friends

I don't have many friends. But I love them. And I find it hard to tell them that so I'll just make a silly tumblr post about it.

I love the one who lives kinda far away and she talks waaay too loud but is always there to listen to me when I need to be listened to. She reminds me how valuable it is to try to be a better person each day.

I love the one who's leaving for college but is one of the funniest people I know. She reminds me to appreciate the small things in life, and that it's okay to take pride in your obsessions (*cough cough* Six of Crows, Young Royals, Call Me By Your Name Movie, etc) and that I'm not as crazy as I sometimes think.

I love the one who we constantly tease over having a late birthday, but she is so hardworking and puts her heart into everything she does. She has a lot going on at home but never fails to make anyone laugh or see the glass as half-full. She reminds me that you don't always have to take life seriously. Sometimes shit is just funny.

I love the one that seems quiet on the outside, but once you get to know her is so genuine and funny I'm jealous sometimes. I never fail to feel completely safe around her, a quality not many people possess. My dog also adores her so she automatically passed the vibe check.

I love the other one who is going off to college. She's pretty quiet, always under the guise of "I'm Tired," but one can still tell how much she cares from her actions. She fought to be able to induct me into this stupid theater thing at school, and her speech was one of the sweetest things someone has ever said about me. She came to the US as a young teenager and she reminds me every day that you don't have to be remarkable to be happy. I know that sounds like such a backhanded compliment and I don't mean it that way at all - but she helps remind me not to beat myself up for my failures because I owe nobody perfection. I don't know if that makes any sense, but I love her.

And my best friends.

One of them, whom I love, is the definition of a nerd. His whole family is made up of nerds, honestly, but it's one of the few places I feel completely safe. This guy puts his whole soul into things he absolutely does not need to, but he does it anyway because he enjoys devoting himself to everything he does. He caught covid last year and what did he do? He learned every single flag of every country on the planet, is what he did. He isn't perfect at it, but I have yet to find a flag he doesn't know. He learned Blender on his own, and has made really cool things with it. He creates, constantly. He is the only teenager I have ever heard of that actually enjoys shakespeare, and he is not shy about it. He could talk about any of his plays for days, and probably recite more than a couple monologues. He volunteers at the classical play theater in our area because he enjoys it. Honestly, I can't tell you the last time I gave him a proper hug, but I should, because I love him so much. So incredibly much. I hope we stay friends for many many many years.

And I love his twin sister. And calling her his twin sister really doesn't do her justice, because she's her own incredible person aside from her incredible brother. If he's the nerd of the family, she's the artist. She draws these incredible photorealistic pencil drawings, but can also paint like there's no tomorrow, but my favorite things are her sculptures. She made this house out of cardboard, painted it, gave it texture, cut out individual shingles for it, and made a dragon to go on top of it, Lord of the Rings style. The house even has a "stained glass" window and electricity. She spent hours upon hours laboring over this simply because she could. She decided her freshman year that she would begin pole vaulting, and now is damn good at it. Her buildings are always the best-looking on our collective minecraft server. She's a drummer and actually a really good actor although she's a techie at heart. And maybe I like her a little more and a little differently than I would ever admit to her, but that's okay. I value her friendship more than I do some silly feelings which will hopefully pass one day, because I love her so incredibly much, and with her, too, I hope to stay friends for many many many years.

I know not many people are actually going to read this and that's really not the point. I feel a little better just knowing my love for them is out into the world. I am trying to be a warmer, more genuine person. This is just one step closer to telling them just how much I love them. Because I love all of them very much.

[whatsupwither]

Entry 4, Forward (hopefully)

Yesterday was Oliver’s birthday. I was planning on sending him a private message saying happy birthday but decided against it. I saw his instagram and I think he might have a girl friend already. He reposted her story saying happy birthday, it was a picture of Oliver with a birthday cake in front of him. He was smiling so softly towards the camera (towards her probably). I’ve never seen him smile like that, it looks so genuine and soft. 

One thing is for sure, I seem to have moved on from him. I didn’t feel jealous of this girl, if anything I was happy Oliver found someone. Though I am not the jealous type. My friend once told me that friends also get quite possessive over one another. She told me that a couple of times whenever I would post myself hanging out with other people, she would feel jealous and would actually stalk these people. I’ve never felt like I ‘owned’ someone, sure I get protective over my friends but I never felt that they were exclusively mine. I do get very possessive over my space, things and pets. So using those parameters, I kinda get it (?). I’ve never been jealous either whenever Oliver would roll with other women or even if he talks about his exes or how other girls know more about him than I ever will. It was never something I was bothered with. If anything I saw an opportunity to know more about him through them.

Do guys like it when women get jealous? do they think its as hot as how some women see a man being possessive and possibly unhinged for her to be nothing short of the most sexiest thing in this world?

I started to realize throughout the days I’ve known Jeremy, I’ve been doing a lot of “do guys think...” or “what does it mean when a guy...” searches on google. Let me do all the girls out there a favor. You most probably won’t like the answer because as much as every girl is different, so are guys. Since these searches doesn’t really help me out, I decided to talk to my guy friends.

They told me some very interesting things about how guys think. I truthfully call BS at most of it though, though that’s probably what they think, it’s not necessarily how Jeremy thinks. Alas what they all say in common is that it clearly won’t work out. I might not be able to be his friend either considering how we both started. They told me the best thing to do is to just treat him as normally throughout BJJ class. I don’t have to keep it up outside of class.

I thought it would be harder for me to do considering I was quite fixated about Jeremy, but after hearing them say it, I’m okay about it. I’m glad nothing transpired between us as it would have made everything harder. I just hope I get to meet someone like him at the right time and circumstances. 

What I am truly afraid of is going back to my old fixation. I talked about Oliver with some of my guy friends today and I felt some of those old feelings rising up. He asked me a question that almost messed me up. “How do you feel if you see him again?”...

I haven’t seen him in a month. Haven’t talked to him in longer. He was at a match today, thought he is not competing, all I thought about was how I wasn’t there to watch with him. His ‘girlfriend’ wasn’t or atleast as far as I can tell from the stories is not there with him. He might not be taken and as much as the sister position throws me off, I don’t see why I shouldn’t at least try... oh god.