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submalevolentgrace · 1 year

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Hi! I'm very interested in attempting to write a disabled character (not for this blog, I assure, for an book I'm writing) in which the story doesn't fetishize/objectify her prosthetic limb. I'm in many writing circles and have been for a long while, but I've never seen this issue brought to light which I realise is a very important one. I have much to change in my thought process, and thank you for bringing this issue to attention.

I'm curious, and I apologise if this has been asked before, but what sort of design could you see for a functional prosthetic that doesn't go for a plainly aesthetic appearance, or is soully to please others? I do note that you said prosthetics are generally... not that helpful. So is there a way that it could be? Or do you think it would always generally be better to not use a prosthetic, as its mostly for aesthetic purposes, as you said?

I apologise if this ask is too outright or anything, and I don't mean to intrude. Thank you for your time and have a beautiful day!

okay, i want to answer this as in depth as possible, because whenever i talk about having a prosthesis, someone will always tag some variation of "#writing reference" and i do wonder what message they're taking away, and i want to get as much of my experience out as possible to maybe help shape how this is all portrayed in the future. and yeah… this is gonna be one of those rambly smg posts that the expand feature was invented for, so i'll start with the very abridged TL;DR:

if you're writing a character with an upper limb prosthesis; don't. arm amputees are unicorn level rare even compared to leg amputees, and i've never interacted with or even heard of an upper limb amputee that regularly uses a prosthesis, let alone relies on one. fiction has lied to you for the sake of cool aesthetics, don't repeat the cycle. more in depth writing advice including nuance and "but i waaaant to" will follow.

that said, grab your donning parachute and let's get started...

context for everyone involved: i am an upper limb amputee that rants a lot about how prostheses suck, i lost my right hand roughly five years ago at roughly the age of 30 after a very rough decline in health… it was pretty rough. this question is being asked in the context of a previous rant post of mine, and i checked that the ask is about an upper limb prosthesis in particular.

the situation regarding the usefulness of lower limb prostheses is totally different; i am definitely no expert, but by all accounts, prosthetic legs are incredibly useful for many people. getting a good leg can be absolutely life changing and more or less necessary for day to day life for some; mostly because infrastructure and society is just so fucking hostile to wheelchair users. being able to walk - at the cost of pressure sores and rashes and increased residual limb pain - is a preferable option to many people than being unable to fit through a doorway or in a bathroom stall or find out that the key to unlock the only elevator is in the admin office up three flights of stairs (true story).

but upper limb prostheses… see, the thing is, hands are incredibly complex organs that rely on a lot of immediate haptic feedback to work at all. hand dexterity is all about control, you need fine granular movements of the digits yes, but you also need the subtle sensations of pressure and proprioception in order to adjust your movements on the fly. i speak from experience, in the years leading up to the full loss of my hand, i was slowly losing function of it, usually swinging between numbness that made it clumsy at best, or screaming overstimulation from moving it at all resulting in unpredictable spasms… and let me tell you, a half working hand is infuriating to try and deal with. you can never know if you have a good grip on something or if it's slipping because of the wrong amount of pressure, and there's only so many smashed bottles of pickles on the floor before you give up using it all together… so amputation wasn't a great loss there, i had time to adapt.

a prosthetic hand of any kind has all of those issues and more. they're heavy and bulky, the cosmetic faux fingers or gripping claw have crude movement at best, and there's zero feedback (put a pin in this). 100% of the time you're using a prosthetic hand you have to keep your eyes on the grip and visually guesstimate whether or not the thing you're carrying is held tight enough but not too tight, that is if your "heavy duty" prosthesis can even support the weight without the servos disengaging or the wrist attachment socket just busting loose. i dropped a whippersnipper on my foot last week when my socket couldn't take the weight and i think that was the final straw in me desperately trying to prove to myself that there is a single task my prosthesis actually helps with.

this is usually where fully two handed people start talking about bleeding edge DARPA tech, and how we just need to invest more,research more, develop more. better tech, more tech, neural integration, more more more. okay i promise the writing advice is coming! for starters on tech, my experience is already with a mid-to-high end ottobock terminal device: i've got a myoelectric nerve-signal operated proportional control heavy duty greifer; about the only upgrade left for me to get would be a rotating wrist joint if i could coflex. it's not military, it's not "rockclimber that owns a prosthetic company", but it's quality tech. it still fucking sucks. secondly, that high level military tech exists primary for PR purposes so they can say they treat their discarded casualties well, "we can rebuild him, we have the technology" style. every war vet i've read about or heard from that's been gifted that high level tech also abandons it for the same reasons; it's imprecise, there's no feedback (or the haptic interface has to be fully recalibrated every time they put it on), but mostly they're more capable without one.

okay, the transhumanist ableds say (i should know, i used to be one), what if we did more ~research and development~ and got that neural feedback working? then we could have fireproof superhumanly strong robot arms to fix up everyone! here's where i take out that pin we put up before and i tell you that a class of prosthetic arms/hands already exists that has perfect proportional control, fine motor control, and physics perfect pressure feedback piped directly into the patients' existing sensory systems! they're called body-powered prostheses, and they were invented in like the 1600s. you strap a whole bunch of stuff to your arm and shoulders shoulders, and control the operation of the terminal device and elbow through cable tension by flexing your shoulders. they do take a considerable amount of training to operate - though hell i spent 18 months training to use my myo - but based on everything i've read, body-powered prostheses are the best option if you're an upper limb amputee and absolutely need a second hand for some reason.

but they don't look cool and futuristic, and according to my prosthetist, most people give up on using them too. we all give up on our prostheses, no matter the type. my rehab OT was impressed i lasted the 18 months of my training. towards the end, they even asked if the clinic director could drop in to one of my sessions to see my progress; he expressed genuine amazement at me casually using my bulky robot claw to use a brush and dustpan, and made an offhanded (hah) comment about what someone can achieve "if they stick it out to the end", implying it was somewhat of a rarity for me to have done so. several years on, and yesterday i wedged the dustpan between my ankles to sweep up into it, awkward but exponentially less effort than putting my dusty robot arm on. which, by the way, is a whole thing. look up some videos, they're all awful to don. i don't actually know the official technical name of what my clinic calls a "parachute" but it's a bitch to use! have you ever tried to pull back with your arm whilst also pushing it forwards at the same time, and simultaneously lean in to and away from an external force pulling on you? that's how you get a myo socket on.

bare with me, i promise writing advice is coming, and i promise it's more than the tl;dr. but. remember when i said a half working hand is infuriating to deal with? any prosthesis, from fancy myo tech to pirate-era body powered, will only ever be half as good as a working hand, and being juuuust within capability to do something but not quite able to is maddening! but you know what works way better than a half working hand? no hand at all. using whatever residual/vestigial limb you have - whatever "stump" you have, i hate that word - is pretty much always better than trying to use a prosthesis. i can use the inside of my elbow to grip and carry things, i can use the nub of my arm to apply pressure to hold things, open doors, use a computer mouse, turn on taps and lights, if i put a glove over it i can use it to prep for cooking. i have full proprioception and pressure feedback with skin contact, i don't think i've ever dropped and broken anything from my elbow, unlike countless things slipped from my greifer - which, by the way, absolutely will start clenching as tight as it can if i get even slightly too sweaty around the electrodes, which has both broken things i'm holding and also injured me, because surprise surprise but servo operated robot claws have pinch points on them right near the "emergency disengage" lever for some reason!

but i am exponentially more capable without it on than with it. no, i'm not fully independent, i rely on housemates and loved ones to help me out with some tasks that simply just need two handed dexterity, but none of those tasks are things a prosthesis makes me able to do anyway. i used to imagine my prosthesis would be like a bra; a bit awkward and uncomfortable, but i'd wear it throughout the day because it's helpful and take it off in the evening to decompress. in reality it's actually exactly like a bra: an absolute bitch to put on one handed, unbearably uncomfortable because it never sits right, ugly af unless you're a millionaire, and absolutely useless except for the fact that i get gawked at and judged by strangers if i leave the house without it on.

and if you really want to discover how far "no hand is better than a half working hand" goes, brace yourself, and look up the patient's stories (not medical system stories) of people that have had hand transplants. the first man to receive one hated it, he was promised a return to normal function, and what he got was a nightmare worse than being one handed; he wanted it removed again but the doctors refused because it would undermine their grand achievement of the first hand transplant. the doctors and society wanted him to be fixed, they wanted him to be normal, they wanted him to be abled. they failed. they made him less able to do things, denied his autonomy, and left him with someone else's hand slowly rotting on him, prioritising the idea of "scientific progress" and "two hands good" over the physical health, mental health, and ability to function of this man.

he's not alone; every story from the patients' perspective about hand transplants that i've read goes this way, including a woman who was born quad limb different and was promised hands would improve her life, pressured into a double hand transplant, only to find herself after the surgery essentially experiencing disability for the first time ever, because she had lived her whole life getting by just fine with her 'underdeveloped' limbs, but half working hands are worse than useless. you can try to find these stories yourself, but i'm not going looking for sources on any of these cases, because if you look back through enough of my posts you'll get a glimpse of the horrors and abuses that i too was put through by doctors who prioritised trying to "fix" me at any cost, rather than providing me the best quality of life, and in turn traumatised me and left me more broken than any loss of limb on its own could. dear goddess, i promise the writing advice is coming.

so. why do upper limb prostheses exist at all? if they're so terrible and useless, what is their function? i want to borrow something someone else left in the tags of a previous rant here, from someone who i believe works in prosthetics and/or rehab, cleaned up and anonymised at their request:

"upper limb functions are wildly more complex than: 1) bear weight static, and 2) bear weight moving. but every single upper limb amputee i know has a fancy expensive prosthetic just gathering dust in the closet because there is literally nothing it can do like a few years of adjustment and if needed non-dominant hand retraining can't do. the existence of forquarter prosthetics to begin with is just kind of silly and useless and entirely to make OTHER people feel comfortable, especially considering they universally are UNcomfortable for the amputee. i hate the notion that as soon as you get the amputation the prosthetic is The Thing That Will Fix You And Make You Feel Normal again because it universally isn't! but every forequarter person i know had like this ideal of Being Fixed By Magic Prosthetic that they were then obviously wildly disappointed by and had to do yet another grieving process with, versus if the dominant narrative were just one of: yeah. it'll take time, there is no magic fix."

and i think that really nails down what the actual purpose of upper limb prostheses is: they're not for the user, they're for the sake of other people. and not just their comfort when looking at our bodies, although based on the pressure for both amputees and people born limb different to get functionless cosmetic plastic hands, there is a lot of that. but it's not just that.

i fully believe that the reason prosthetic hands exists is to comfort the fears of the two handed. "don't worry", they say, "we can fix you again. you don't have to fear becoming Disabled, you don't have to worry about adapting or your life changing. we can make you Normal™ again."

you would not believe the number of people that have approached me to shower me with pity, to tell me how horrific my life is, how they can't imagine it. people have told me, apropos of nothing, that they'd kill themselves if they lost a hand. indirectly, that my life isn't worth living. unless, of course, i happen to be wearing my cool as fuck looking robot prosthesis! then they tell me how wonderful it is, how lucky i am, how glad they are that we have the technology to fix me. that's what a prosthetic hand says, what all the happy fishing photos on limbs4life posters at the rehab clinic say: don't worry, we can fix you. that's what the bleeding edge DARPA flexi-whatever fully articulated neuro-feedback hands say: don't worry if you get IED'd while hunting civilians for us to drone bomb, if you get hurt, we will fix you, we will fix the fuck out of you, we will motherfucking adam jensen you into a cool as fuck cyborg that your son will idolise; come on boys, don't you wanna enlist just for the chance at being as cool as this? join the bomb squad for a ticket to the upgrade lottery.

and so we arrive at fiction. as much as his dialogue options protest, adam jensen loves his robot arms, they punch through walls, turn into fucking swords! they make him the most special man in the world. what would he do without them? learn to cope? grieve? practice acceptance? take up poetry? just, be disabled? there's no power fantasy for ableds in that.

in fact, can you think of a single fictional character that's an upper limb amputee that's, well, just an amputee? they all have robot arms. not realistic prostheses, not medical devices; robot arms. sleek or bulky, top of the line or broken down self built, steampunk or nanomachines or magitech automail; they're never without them. never just an amputee. never born limb different either! there's always that element of tragedy to overcome, always suffering and misery porn, always focus on the pain and the helplessness without the absolutely vital robot arm that makes them Normal and Whole. the closest amputee example i can think of is furiosa from mad max, who iirc fucking punches max in the face with her residual limb like a motherfucking badass! i can barely lean on mine wrong and she punches a guy! but she still apparently needs a dieselpunk robot hand to drive a truck, something you can do one handed so easily most drivers don't even notice they're doing it! please don't, by the way

and so many disabled fans love to point to robot armed characters as disability representation; the winter soldier, luke skywalker, edward elric, misty knight, that genderswapped furry girl from ratchet and clank, jet cowboybebop, finn the human, and yes, adam jensen…. these are all characters that someone disabled i know has told me they love because they "represent disabled bodies"…. and i know nobody wants to hear this, because i've been screamed at for saying it before, but… they do not. they are not disabled, functionally or within fiction. they are either perfectly able bodied Normal people with chrome paint on an arm, or tortured misery porn we are supposed to pity and feel lucky we're not them. sometimes both!

also you ever notice how it's basically always arms? lower limb amputations are orders of magnitude more common than upper, my prosthetist said i was probably only the 4th or 5th upper limb she'd worked with in her career, with literally hundreds of lower limb fits. but fiction doesn't seem to reflect that, huh? or any other part of the reality of disability. it's always cool as fuck robot arms, never cool as fuck wheelchairs or crutches or dialysis machines or colostomy bags. a fair few "i was blind but now i can see with Robot Eyes and also infrared and xray" around, which again, plays into that "we can fix you and make you cooler" propaganda.

by the way, up above when i was describing body powered arms, if you wondered to yourself why i went with a myoelectric one instead when i clearly believe body powered is better… yeah. i am not immune to propaganda! i too wanted to be cool as fuck. i spent years with deteriorating function in my hand for reasons that are still unknown, was misdiagnosed and medically neglected to the point that removing my hand seemed to be the only option left to offer some relief, and even that was a clusterfuck that left me worse than ever… of course i wanted to believe in the power and prestige of a cool robot arm that fiction promised me.

but fiction promises fantastical lies. and so.

we get to the writing advice portion of the novella that is this post. you asked for advice on how to write a disabled character with an upper limb prosthesis. you've read the tl;dr, you've read everything above i assume, you know i don't want you to do it. the obvious twist is that it's been writing advice all along, me trying to share my perspective on what it's like being an amp with a robot arm and how shitty it is, implying how almost any fully realised and realistic character that's missing an upper limb would give up on a prosthesis at all. you can already tell that every value judgement in me says "don't give her a prosthesis, no matter how functional or cool you make it. don't try to make the tech better to justify it, just let her be one armed, one handed. just let her be disabled, but not helpless. let her show off her elbow or underarm carry strength. let her love interest appreciate how soft and squishy her residual limb is in a moment of tenderness. let her natural disabled body be respected and valued."

but that's a personal value judgement from me, and you are the author of your own work. i know it's trite to say, but you are! even the act of deferring to someone with lived experience in the hope of doing a better job at representation is a value judgement, a good choice in my opinion, but one you needn't necessarily take. maybe you do want to write a character that has a cool as fuck unrealistic robot arm as a power fantasy, or a comfort blanket… i did.

i've been slowly writing my own probably terrible scifi epic for over a decade now, and when my arm was giving me hell back then, i'd take great comfort in this fantasy of my protagonist with her chunky robot arm, the terrible traumatic suffering of her loss, overcoming, the power and ability her advanced prosthesis gives her over others, that she alone has access to, because others are not willing to make the sacrifices required. inspiration porn. awful stuff to me now, but empowering to me then. as i grew and gained direct experience, i slowly reimagined her, rewrote her, ship of theseus'd her into an entirely new character; a reflection of me now, bitter at the whole thing, spiteful that her natural flesh arm evokes fear and distrust, but unwilling to suffer the pain and frustration of her unnatural prosthesis just to make others comfortable and respect her as "whole", however artificial that whole is. and as with the ship of theseus being two ships, once i realised the transformation, i re-added the old protagonist back in whole cloth as a separate character; proud of her robot arm and its power, but in new context, as a foil and antagonist, an in-universe military prosthesis propaganda figure to reflect how i now feel characters like her exist to us, the readers.

i'm not just sharing that as egotistical self promotion, but to highlight that, even if i sit here begging you all up and down not to write characters with robot arms for how bad and unrealistic they are; there's still something genuine and true that their inclusion can say. the great thing about the story that you're writing is that only you can write it, as they say. but i whole heartedly believe that to write to your best, you have to be aware of what you're writing and why. as tempting as it is to feel these characters form naturally in us and therefore we're averse to changing traits about them that feel organic and self evident; as authors we have omnipotent control over the text, every trait and detail is a reflection on us, so we'd sure as hell better understand why we're choosing to write a character with this trait. because anything you write without being aware of intent will take on its own meaning in the space between.

and on that note, if i don't say this, i'm leaving it to be inferred: i definitely don't want to appear to come down on the side of saying "you cannot write an amputee unless you are one", because we are rarer than single young bisexual unicorns! and it would be a tragedy if anyone read through all this and then turned away in fear, deciding to never write an amputee character (with or without robot arm) because they feel they can't do it justice… believe me, no matter what anyone says, some hack writer somewhere is going to keep writing adam jensens and winter soldiers. don't let them be the only voices in fiction! just try to do your best.

so my ultimate advice on the topic of writing a character with a prosthetic limb is to ask yourself one question in two different frameworks, and meditate on what you feel the answer is:

why does she have a prosthesis?

from a doylelist perspective as the kids say, as an author with omnipotent control, why are you choosing to write about this topic? why are you choosing to give this trait to this character? what does it say about how you view ability and disability, what makes a person normal, and what our society values? will you let her be in her natural body? or will you give her a prosthesis, force her to wear it by authorial fiat, or author her a meaningful reason to choose to? if yes, be sure you know; why did you give her a prosthesis?

and from a wastonian perspective, diegetically, inside the story, why does she choose to wear a prosthesis? what does it say about her inner character, and how she interacts with the world? how does she feel about doing it, is she prideful and loves the attention she gets, or does she resent whatever necessitates its use? how do people in this world view ability and disability, what does this society value? and above all, whatever the answer to these questions, whether or not she uses a prosthesis or is badass without one, how does she deal with the eternal freezing cold that every amputee ever feels constantly in their residual limb and why does nobody make a heat pack that fits over a nub without drafty gaps???

i can't outright tell you how to write a good upper limb amputee, but if you at least know why you're writing one and for what purpose, you're on track to write the best character that you can. that's the best advice i can give… other than, like, this whole rambly mess.

and, as a reward for reading this far, please have a very blurry cryptid photo of my cat doing his old man sit:

#prosthesis #prosthetic #disability #ableism

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factual-fantasy · 23 days

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18 Asks! Thank you!! :}} 🎪

@pink088

Guuuuurl does it look like I missed the boops? XDD

(I DID miss the super boops and revenge boops tho. I was trashed on the couch and stuck on mobile all day so I wasn't able to send any back to anyone💔💔)

Uhhhmm... oh jeez lemme try to remember-- I'm assuming you mean the order I got everyone in the game..?? Cuz other than the goofy little comics I've been drawing there isn't much of a story beyond that-

Uhhh so I started with Midori(Sprigatito) obviously, thennn... I think I caught Grim(Gastly).. then I caught Gloria(Ralts). Thenn..... arrhrhhgh I thiiiink I went looking for eevees, but I found Anastasia(Shiny Kricketot) in the process and kept her. Then I picked one of the eevees I caught at random and kept him. Then lastly I found a Mareep(Bonnie) by surprise and kept her.

My memory is very poor but I thiiink that's mostly accurate <XDD If I misunderstood your question don't be afraid to send another ask! 😅

@pbjfox37147878

Sorry, I don't take requests.. But hey! You already got a solid concept going and some artistic talent, you can always make it yourself for free! :0

Not really.. I've had a surprising number of uncomfortable experiences with the fandom recently so I've decided to take a step back from Octonauts for a while..

@psype

:DD Thank you! I'm glad you like them! :}}

And yeah that's how I pictured her XDD its becuase I use her the most out of all my Pokémon-

Now she's not bossy and doesn't have a leader or "I'm better that you guys" complex, none of that! She's just very intelligent and usually very level headed and calm. I can imagine that she's gotten the team safely through a lot of complicated situations and her plans/advice have rarely led the group astray.

Plus since I use her so often, I like to think that she's one of the most powerful Pokémon on the team. If not the most powerful. So whenever the group was met with a great danger, Gloria was probably the one to rescue them <XD

So the whole group kind'a gravitates behind her and lets/wants her to take the lead most of the time. Especially when things get complicated or dangerous!

@nerdyskullcap (User in ask)

I took a peek at their blog, but I couldn't find any original art of the Conductor after quite a while of scrolling through that tag.. I only found reblogs of other peoples Conductor comics.. <:(

XD That description of Gloria is very fitting! I use her the most out of all my Pokémon and she rarely loses! XDD

This was a cool read, and hey! Some of my Pokémon have some of those attacks! :000 Gloria has draining kiss and Bonnie has discharge! :D

@cat7890

I'd like to think they've never fought before.. maybe some little bickering on a bad day, but never anything serious.

They have good communication and just generally get along really well and like a lot of the same things. So there's rarely conflict between them! :0

Thank you! I'm happy to hear that you like my artwork! :}}

As for your question.. I'm afraid I don't understand/cant explain it--

Lets say I wanna draw Mario. I imagine what the drawing might end up looking like in my head, what pose I'll draw him in and what colors I'll use.. And then I just.. draw it. It might not look exactly like what I pictured but its probably close enough.

If that doesn't answer your question, I'm afraid I either don't understand your question or this is just an art thing that I don't know how to explain. <:( Sorry, feel free to send another ask with more specifics if you have them!

@sleep-deprived-fr3ak

If Bill ever became a lawyer? All hope is lost XDD

@raven-bearden-the-interviewer42

I haven't really thought about the details of the crews travels and adventures.. but I'm sure that when Louis got cursed and became a crab monster? That was probably pretty memorable XD

Probably this one honestly <XD I cant think of anything more cursed off the top of my head-

@fawncr33k

I suppose that would be fine, but I wouldn't prefer it. As I've said many times,, just comments guys! Asks, reblogs, tags, how ever you type them. I just want comments.👍

@neo-metalscottic

No problem! Getting asks are usually a pick me up :}}

As for the Dry Bones thing, that's what I meant by "not sure how it fits into the AU yet" 😅 Who'd they fight? Why did they fight? When did this happen? No idea. Its all just a neat concept with no structure yet :// And beyond the awkward living situation with the Dry Bones today, I haven't really thought about how the Koopa culture has been changed by the war. That's just way too much thinking and I'm way too sick to bother trying to figure it out atm- 💀💔 But maybe someday I'll think it through!

Now Luigi, I had this idea that he had a bizarre encounter with a 1-UP and was later bitten by a Goomba. Over the span of say... 5 days or so..? Luigi slowly got weaker and weaker until eventually he became bedridden and actually died- He came back to life moments after but it still completely shook Mario and Luigi's worlds for a sec there-

I had intended to draw a comic about this, and I made a sketch about it in the past.. but around the time I thought of this idea my Mario phase was kind'a passing over so I didn't feel like making it- <XDD

As for a potential sequel, I would like to see Wario, Waluigi and Toadsworth. Not sure why Toadsworth wasn't in the first movie- he absolutely should have been. That deep voiced purple..? council..? toad guy?? Totally should have been Toadsworth :/

And my request for the Wario bros is that they are taken seriously. 😅🤣

@cherrycreamfairy

I'm doing okay so far today, thank you! :}

@littlelightfish

I haven't really figured out the details about how Tuna and Louis lost their limbs- 😅

But I'm considering that Louis lost his arm (I assume you meant his arm-) in some kind of work related accident a long time ago. It must have been a fishing accident somehow..

As for Tuna, either some kind of natural disaster/accident or.. someone "removed" them... O-O

I do not :/ I'm not even sure what homestuck is.. I thiiink its a webcomic-

@nemo-draco

Oooo! :00 It looks cool! :DD

And thank you, I'm hoping I get over this soon too 😅

#my response #cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run ocs #my ocs #super mario bros #mario movie #pokemon scarlet and violet

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angelltheninth · 2 years

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Feeling extra naugthy today. Can I have some hds for how MCU men would punish their fem SO? Like teasing them and denying them orgasms, or being extra rough or extra slow, maybe something in public too, or degrading dirty talk? What ever you can think of really.

Oh absolutely Anon, you can be as naughty as you want we don't kink shame on this blog.

Pairing: Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Loki, Thor, Steven Grant, Scott Lang, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, M'Baku x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, dom/sub, orgasm denial, orgasm control, dirty talk, rough blowjobs, handjobs, sex toys, masturbation, spanking, degradation, praise, teasing, fingering, oral, clit stimulation, rough sex, semi-public sex, overstimulation, restrains, begging, manhandling

A/N: This is probably the most tags/warnings I've ever used so you should feel accomplished Anon.

Steve is the kind of man who would make you come over and over. Even when he knows you can't take anymore orgasms he'd keep going, all the while whispering how good you are for him, for letting him use you like a pretty little toy, how well you're taking his cock and his cum. He'd make you come on his cock again and again until you pass out from the pleasure.

Bucky would deny you pleasure for days. He'd make you watch him get off, make you suck his cock, lick up all of his cum while you finger yourself to an edge of an orgasm and then tell you to stop while he empties down your throat. He'd bring you to tears from days of overstimulation and denial, you'd be so sensitive just the simplest touch from him would make you squirt at his command.

When it comes to Sam's punishments they're a little more... hands off. He'll make you masturbate together with him, telling all about how he wants to just slam his cock into you, make you gush and squeeze around him. But you're not getting his cock or his cum inside you today. In fact he's gonna make you sit still and rub your clit while he jerks off inches away from your face, so have to try and catch his load on your tongue.

Loki likes to tie you up and fuck every hole he can. And don't expect him to be gentle about it either or for him to care about your pleasure that much. Nope. Not today. Today you're your holes are his to use and ruin as he pleases. You will take his come, you'll be covered in it by the time he's done, and you'll still beg for more because he knows what a needy whore you are for him. You'll never get enough and that's ok. Because he's never gonna stop wanting to fuck and take you like you're meant to be taken.

Thor will eat you out, praise you, make you worship his cock, make you suck him off while he eats food, he'll bounce you up on down on his cock like you weigh nothing and give you more creampies than you can handle. He loves the way you squeeze around him, the way you gush your juices all over his chin, how desperate you are for your next orgasm that you'll let him just fuck you in position he sees fit. By the time he's done you're absolutely dripping and covered with his seed.

Steven is really slow, like painfully slow while he fucks you. He knows you want him to just let loose and hammer away into your cunt but he won't, no matter how much you beg or squirm or chase his cock, mouth or fingers. He'll rub your clit equally as slow, keeping you tethering on the edge of bliss and pleasure. He could do it for hours, he has all the time in the world, and he wants to spend it with his hard cock deep inside your needy, desperate cunt.

Now Scott is a very teasing kind of man. He'll wake you up in the morning with his cock rubbing between your clenched thighs, telling you what you did wrong and how he's gonna have so much fun with you today. He'd lay on his back while watching you suck his cock, making him spill down your throat and gulp it all down. The tip of his cock would brush against your hard clit, giving you enough stimulation to feel good but not enough to make you come just yet. Not before he buries his cock deep inside you and fucks you hard that is.

Clint loves making you ride a dildo while sucking his cock, he loves hearing the sloppy, wet sounds your pussy makes when it's so needy for the real thing. He also loves being fingers deep inside you right after he makes you come, dragging out your orgasm for as long as possible before giving you another, and another, and another until you collapse on the bed from exhaustion.

Tony will make you wear vibrating panties or have a vibrator inside you in public. Knowing that he has control over your pleasure really gets him going. He'd tease you with the different vibrations all day, so when you come home you're beyond wet for him, making his cock slide in with no resistance at all as you desperately fuck yourself on his cock, chasing the pleasure you've been denied by him all day.

M'Baku is really rough with you, he likes making you see that he's in charge, making you worship his cock with your mouth and your pussy all day and night. He'd pin your arms above your head and spread your legs so you can see how his cock slams inside you, stretching you, filling you up. If he feels like it he'll fuck you on his throne too, make you take his cum while knowing you could be interrupted any moment.

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mochinomnoms · 3 months

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francesca (1K Follower Special Event)

art: “hold me, dear” by raiain

“Heaven is not fit to house a love like you and I” — Hozier, Francesca from “Unreal Unearth” Their love for you is so overwhelming, so profuse, their hunger for love is worse than their hunger for food, water, or sleep. They yearn for you and your affections, like a baby yearns for the embrace of their parents. From the gods above, to the demons below, there is no where that can house or comprehend the love you share with them. spotify playlist

A song fic event to celebrate over 1,000 followers!

Requests are closed

Rules

Anyone can use this event and prompts on their own blog! Tag me in so I can read all your stories!

This event will be for TWST on my end, others are free to use for whatever they'd like!

All request will be up to 500 words, with a max of 3 characters per request

Chose one prompt for each request with one song (randomly selected line will be used for the request), and indicate if you want romantic or platonic. You can also indicate if you want fluff, hurt/comfort, suggestive, nsfw etc.

Reader will default to gender-neutral unless asked otherwise

Dialogue Prompts (@mcflymemes: 1/2/3)

“It's funny. Sometimes I think I've already fallen in love with you as much as possible… and then we share a night like this.”

“I'm falling more and more in love with you every day.”

“Do you feel connected to me when we're together like that?”

“You made a few sounds I've never heard before.”

“Can I get you anything? Do you need me to do anything?”

“Touch me like that again.”

“You look so good like this.”

“Tell me when I can move.”

“It's like your body was built for mine.”

“You like that, don't you.”

“You don't know what that does to me.”

“Kiss me again, and don't stop this time.”

“I can't bear the thought of living without you.”

“You complete me.”

“I want all of you. Every piece of you.”

“I won't lose you again.”

“You're the most important person I have ever known.”

“The universe gave you to me.”

“Can I kiss you again? I promise I won't get carried away.”

“Where you go, I follow.”

Song Selection

Hozier, “Unreal Unearth”; “Wasteland, Baby!”; “Nina Cried Power — EP”

De Selby (Part 1)

De Selby (Part 2)

Francesca

Eat Your Young

First Light

Movement

Talk

Sunlight

NFWMB

Moment's Silence (Common Tongue)

Rio Romero, “Good God!”

Inarticulation

Nothing's New

Twice

Eyedress, “Let's Skip to the Wedding”

Romantic Lover

Jealous

Kiss Me Like It's the First Time

Ricky Montgomery, “Montgomery Ricky”

Line Without a Hook

My Heart Is Buried in Venice

Mr. Loverman

Kali Uchis, “Sin Miedo (del Amor y Otros Demonios)”

la luna enamorada

telepatía

Misc. Artists

See You Again (Tyler, The Creator, “Flower Boy”)

Me Gustas Tu (Manu Chao, “Próxima Estación: Esperanza”)

Die For You (The Weeknd, “Starboy”)

🎶 francesca masterlist 🎶

“It ain’t workin’ ‘cause you’re perfect”: jamil viper x gn!reader — #19

“And flew like a moth to you, sunlight, oh, sunlight”: azul ashengrotto x gn!reader — #15

“Be like the love that discovered the sin”; “And I'd be the immediate forgiveness in Eurydice”; “If I could hold you for a minute/I'd go through it again”: jade leech, trey clover, ace trappola (separate) x gn!reader — #16

“Y al contemplarla en su mirada”: azul ashengrotto x gn!reader — #4

“I always want your love”: ruggie bucchi x gn!reader — #19

“Oh, was it something I said to make you feel like you're a burden”; “All my emotions feel like explosions when you are around”: leona kingscholar, azul ashengrotto (separate) x gn!reader — #15 [PENDING]

“Si te tuviera de frente, la mente te la volaría”; “You know that I can see right through you”: deuce spade, lilia vanrouge (separate) x gn!reader — #9 [QUEUED]

“'Cause we've found ourselves in quite a situation”: silver x gn!reader — #9

“The sky set to burst, the gold and the rust”; “But after this, I'm never gonna be the same”: jade leech, floyd leech (separate) x gn!reader — #3

“It's got nothing to do with us”: divus crewel x gn!reader — #16

“One look is all it takes”: floyd leech x afab gn!reader — #15

“I'm not always right”; “It's gonna happen sometimes”; “I don't think of giving up”: azul ashengrotto, riddle rosehearts, kalim al-asim (separate) x f!reader — #14

“You know I'm just a flight away”: floyd leech x gn!reader — #7

“I can hear your thoughts like a melody”: kalim al-asim x gn!reader — #19

“I wish I could fall in love with you again”; “I know I can fall in love”; “I can only hope that’s what you are craving too”: jack howl, sebek zigvolt, silver (separate) x gn!reader — #19

“Que se podría hacer el amor por telepatía”: jade leech x gn!reader — #4

“And are you pretty or handsome? My words are on ransom”; “With you by my side is where I wanna stand”: trey clover, ruggie bucchi (separate) x gn!reader — #11

“Honey, I'm put in awe of somethin' so flawed and free”: silver x gn!reader — #15

“La venganza es dulce, ¿sabes? (Dulce, dulce, dulce, dulce, dulce)”: ace trappola, deuce space (poly) x gn!reader — #1

“I am just a line without a—”; “And if I've lost my charm / Apologies due, no harm”; “Forgive me, I'm not naïve”: floyd leech, azul ashengrotto, jade leech (separate) x gn!reader — #19 & #16

“Me gusta volver, me gustas tú”: jack howl x gn!reader — #13

“Nothing fucks with my baby”; “I'd wanna be felled by you”: leona kingscholar, vil schoenheit (separate) x gn!reader — #16

“And I've found hope in a heart attack”: jack howl x gn!reader — #13

Bonus:

“Heaven is not fit to hold a love like you and I”: ace trappola, deuce spade (poly) x gn!reader — #1

“¿Qué horas son, mi corazón?”: grim (platonic) x gn!reader — #20

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst prompts #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #francesca (1K event)#writing prompts #mochi masterlist #song fic

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p-redux · 2 months

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So, more info from Hyrox Glasgow 2024! Again, thanks Team for all the DMs, I really appreciate you! ❤️

Reminder of what I posted yesterday.

And

So, today, I get this video of Sarah Holden competing at Hyrox Glasgow, and you can CLEARLY hear Sam Heughan cheering her on. Sam's voice is at the very end. At the beginning, you hear a man with a thick Glasgow accent pronouncing Sarah's name Serah. That's NOT Sam. There's also a woman's voice. And at the END of the video, you can hear Sam's unmistakable "C'mon, Sarah!" This was shared by one of the Team and I saved it to my YouTube Channel. Enjoy!👇

I also received this DM with additional info. 👇 Posted with permission.

Here's the pic where Sam is tagged. 👇

And Sarah posting she got FOMO aka Fear Of Missing Out and spontaneously competed today in the women's open race. 👇 She definitely matches Sam's energy level! I'm tired just looking at her. 😊

Anyhoooo, I also got some conflicting info regarding whether Sam competed yesterday after all. I was alerted to this Tweet. 👇

And then I received this DM from someone I've never talked to. 👇

It's all very confusing. On the one hand, it is weird that if Sam competed, he never posted anything on his own IG. On the other hand, Hyrox DID post his results as if he DID compete yesterday. 👇

If Sam decided to not compete and wanted to give his slot to someone else, why wouldn't Hyrox be able to substitute the other man's name? Everything is computerized, so I don't see why they couldn't have made the change easily. Also, isn't it fraudulent to post results with Sam Heughan's name if he wasn't the one competing?

On the flip side, if Sam didn't actually compete, then he literally went to Hyrox to watch Sarah! Those saying "No, he went to watch his friend, Valbo. who also competed." Yeah, except Valbo didn't compete until 6:00 PM yesterday, and Sam was there at 12:00 PM, when the women's competitions started. Literally RIGHT THERE where Sarah was competing. 👇

No reason for Sam to be there 6 HOURS before Valbo was competing if he only went to support Valbo. 🤷‍♀️

I ran out of room to post pics since Tumblr limits to 10 pics, but I also got a DM saying Sam got a bunch of new Instagram follows who are Sarah Holden fans. That leads me to think they went to follow him because they saw him with Sarah at Hyrox.

So, that's it for now. I'm in the process of vetting someone from the Glasgowish area who approached me with some Sam and Sarah info. If she and the info check out, then I'll post it.

PS. I'm hearing from people that my usual haters and assorted newish haters are gnashing their teeth about my #samarah posts...same as it ever was. This has happened any time I've ever posted about Sam possibly dating someone. If you look at my track record for the last 10 years, my info has been at least 90% accurate. No one in the Outlander fandom would have known about Cait and Tony, and Sam and Cody, Abbie, Mackenzie, etc if not for my INSIDER source info, and me posting it FIRST. Facts, people. So, the hate makes no never mind to me. I keep doing me. I'm here for those who want the info. If that's not you, go somewhere else. Simple as that.

Oh, one more thing...the LIE that I have a restraining order against me from Sam resurfaced in my Inbox. Let's use our brains once in our lifetime, shall we? If I had a restraining order or a cease and desist, I wouldn't still be here, now would I? Doh. 🤦‍♀️ My blog is just like any celebrity news blog. It's called freedom of speech, peeps. And in the USA people have died to protect this right. That's all, folks.

#samheughan #sam heughan #sarah holden #samarah #hyrox #hyrox glasgow #big red oliver #valbo #results #haters gonna hate #freedom of speech

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wangxianficfinder · 6 months

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Fic Finder

~*~

1. Hello! I’m hoping to find a specific fic, which is narrated from the POV of a mail delivery person from a small sect. They observed how Lan Wangji came to mail a letter every year to Wei Ying after his death, and came to see the melancholy and longing that Wangji had. They were not able to deliver the letters but they kept it. Eventually they didn’t see Wangji come to mail his letter on a particular year, but out of duty, the mail delivery person went to Cloud Recess to deliver the letters he kept. And there, he met Wangji and Wei Ying.

It’s a beautifully written fic that I read years ago, but for the life of me I can’t remember the name. I did a lot of searching on my bookmarks but can’t find it. I would really appreciate it if someone can point me to the right direction!

Thanks so much. @tacitanovember

FOUND! you’ve got to find a way, say what you want to say by Quixiote (T, 12k, wangxian, outsider pov, 13 years of WWX’s death, letters)

~*~

2. hello, i am very sorry to send this ask but i've been trying to find this fic. (Please don't feel bad! This is what our blog is here for! ^^ - Mod C) i don't remember anything about it other than this scene in which LWJ is holding LSZ while they're on a boat because he's getting seasick and he takes care of him while he sleeps. if i remember correctly it was Sizhui-centric. thank you so much in advance!

FOUND? Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Not Rated, 19k, WangXian, dad wangji, LWJ's Questionable Parenting Skills, Grief/Mourning, Recovery, Injury Recovery, Hopeful Ending, Canon-Typical Violence)

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3. hiii, I'm looking for a fic in which Jiang cheng suddenly starts hearing other people's thoughts and ends up hearing lwj thinking about wwx (inappropriately) @mercurygirlwt28

FOUND! Losing My Mind by pupeez4eva (T, 6k, wangxian, JC & WWX, Humor, Protective JC, JC drinks a potion that lets him hear people's lustful thoughts, Teenage LWJ has a lot of feelings, Canon Divergence, Cloud Recesses study arc)

~*~

4. heyy there! i was wondering if you could help me find a fic from a while ago. basically wwx nearly dies when he fell from nightless city, but was however saved by baoshan sanren. in the the end to save wwx, she had to give her golden core to him so she was no longer immortal (i think). thanks in advance! @aquiver-heart

FOUND? Ghosts Shouldn’t by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 15k, WangXian, Grief/Mourning, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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5. sorry to bother you but I've been trying to find a fic for some time and I can't. is a multi-part series. in the first part wei ying is left to take care of some young disciples and lan qiren forgets to send someone to replace him. the next parts are about how they don't have enough teachers and how wei ying would fit the role. sorry for my writing. i used google translate to write. @mazilu06122001

FOUND? ❤️ Joy In the Midst of These Things Series by Glitterbombshell (T/G, 53k, WangXian, Angst with Happy Ending, Post-Canon, Teacher WWX, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff)

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6. Hey there, I’m looking for a onshot fic where WWX repeatedly say “I love you” to LWJ who never says it back until after WWX is resurrected and then he is the one repeatedly say “I love you” to wwx. I’m pretty sure I found it on your blog but I haven’t found it since. @gwencaer

FOUND! When the Words Stop Coming by mrcformoso (T, 7k, WangXian, Canon Compliant, POV WWX, POV LWJ, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Canonical Character Death, Love Confessions, Rejection, LWJ is a Panicked Gay, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Trauma, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sad with a Happy Ending)

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7. Good day! There's this fic that I've read before and I forgot what tag/s I used to bookmark it. I only remember bits of details. So, the scene that I remember is during the sects were trapped in the burial mounds—that chapter when the juniors were kidnapped—yiling patriarch wwx was sleeping (or dead?) at the blood pool(?). Then the present wwx came to dead/yp!wwx to wake him up (something like that) so they can save the others from the puppets. It is before they go to Lotus Pier. I think there's also a scene where they tried to save him (yp!wwx) that they cant leave him alone at the burial mounds or smth. Im sorry, that all I can recall but I really want to find it again. Thank you!

~*~

8. I’m looking for the fic where little WWX is in Cloud Recesses and little LWJ is like “gonna marry him” and when he’s told “no” he finds different ways to tie his ribbon to little WWX until the adults give in?

are you sure it's Cloud Recesses? bc if you are not sure, this sounds like the Sami fic where Jiang Yanli travels back in time, but that part of the fic takes place at Lotus Pier

FOUND! Sail Away Sweet Sister by sami (M, 73k, WangXian, YZY/CSSR/MDM Lan, MingLi, Time Travel, EXTREME Canon Divergence, Wide Focus Narrative, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Most Named/Canon Characters Live, Childhood Friends to Lovers, Families of Choice, Parenthood, this work contains a major tonal shift, Fluff, Angst, Underage Sex, not particularly explicit, but not at all ambiguous, PTSD, Only a tiny bit, Unforeseeable consequences, The butterfly effect, Slightly Dark JYL, Asexual Characters, but that's not really the focus, Canon-Typical Violence)

not FOUND 💖 Let the Heavens be the judge by A_Mirror_of_memories (T, 4k, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-It, Not JC friendly, YZY Bashing, minor character death offscreen, JC is the worst, Angst with a Happy Ending, offscreen child character death, Fluff and Angst, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, CSSR and WCZ Live, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies)

~*~

9. ficfinder request! modern college au where Wei ying is a student that arrived late to a class that lab qiren should be teaching but instead lan zhan is, and Wei ying is sassy/rude to Lan zhan. I think it's rated E but I can't remember anything else. TIA! @the-marathon-continues-nip

~*~

10. Hello, I am looking for a fic that focused on lsz feeling worried that wwx will feel disappointed that he grew up lan. The fic references what he told lsz the first time lwg left the wen settlement. This fic has been stuck in my head but I can't find it, I would rlly appreciate some help! 😭 @fox1023

~*~

11. A) There's this fic where WWX moves into a house and ghost LWJ lives in the attic or something like that, it's an Eldritch horror kind of fic I think? Iirc Lwj doesn't have a face and he drips water but I could be mixing up different things.

B) I'm also looking for a fic that's kinda the opposite? Where it's WWX who lives in the house and LWJ pretends he doesn't see him

11A)

FOUND! ghost stories for lost souls by queenklu (M, 17k, WangXian, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Body Horror, (of the ghostly variety - hey number of limbs are hard), child death (not explicitly described), Ghost Hunting, Spirit Box, Juice Box, Reincarnation)

11B)

FOUND! one good thing by Yuu_chi (T, 26k, WangXian, Modern AU, Ghost WWX, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, I swear there really is a happy ending, And an alarming amount of rabbits, [Podfic] One Good Thing by jellyfishfire)

~*~

12. Hello, I saw someone from Twitter asking about a fic where Jiang Cheng wished Wei Wuxian never existed after their battle in Nightless City (I'm guessing this is when WWX battled with the other cultivation sects and JYL died). They recalled it has some elements of poppy flowers dying and WWX's soul being connected with it will totally dissipate too.

Can you help? @tiredlaoshi

FOUND? Remember by Amona (T, 59k, JC & WWX, wangxian, Canon Divergence, self-sacrifice, erasing oneself from history, colored souls, sword spirits, major angst w happy ending, implied/referenced rape/non-con, minor character death, WIP)

FOUND? The Way It Wasn’t by KouriArashi (T, 72k, WangXian, XiYao, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fix-It, (eventually haha), Slow Build, Family Feels, Moral Ambiguity, Eventual Happy Ending)

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13. Hey so the fic lm looking for is a Jiang Cheng centric fic but it does have Wangxian in it but it's a time travel fic with JC fixing thing he gets NHS to help him travel back it's OK if you can't find it tho

FOUND? Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 103k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Fix-It)

FOUND? heaven is for me too high by stiltonbasket (M, 11k, JC & WWX & JYL, wangxian, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, LXC/NMJ, LWJ & JC, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, aka the one where JC goes back to the past, and absolutely does not want to be there, Politics, Angst, POV JC, the jc and lwj alliance nobody expected, Bad Matchmaking, Team as Family, Happy Ending, WIP)

FOUND? Moments of Revelation by meyari (T, 134k, JC/NHS, wangxian, LXC/JGY, major character death, POV JC, Canon Divergence, Temporary Character Death, Character Death, Time Travel Fix-It, Self-Sacrifice, Torture, Chronic Pain, Chronic anxiety, magical healing and how it fails, Grief/Mourning, PTSD, Chronic Mental Health Issues, learning to communicate for stubborn people, premeditated murder as a method of problem solving, Assassination, renamed meng yao, Because of Reasons, Warning: JGS, Warning: WRH, Families of Choice, no elders are perfect not one of them, Unreliable Narrator(s), Demonic Possession)

FOUND? For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by sami (E, 65k, wangxian, JC & WWX; JC & LWJ, LWJ & LXC, Canonical Character Death, Mentions of Rape, not explicit but definitely referenced, Time Travel, Not Everyone Dies au, Canon-Typical Violence, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, WWX/babie tendencies, WQ is a queen in any reality, Healing, Yunmeng Shuangjie, Canon Divergence, Asexual JC, First Time, Getting Together, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, WWX finds new ways to be oblivious, seriously it surprised even us)

~*~

14. Hi!!! I am looking for a fic where wei wuxian travels back in time but tries to kill himself to avoid all the tragedy that happened to his loved ones. Please help me find this one!!!

FOUND? (Un)Hidden truth by Sarah_R (M, 198k, wangxian, major character death, graphic depictions of violence, characters watching their show, characters watching the future, watching the future, Time Travel Fix-It, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide Attempt, On the first chapter, Suicidal Thoughts, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Nightmares, Self-Harm, dark, fluff, Angst, LWJ best husband, WWX needs all the love and hugs in the world, and he gets it, WWX Protection Squad, The juniors are literally the light of the show, WQ best sister, YZY and JFM will realize what an absolute shit they’ve been, Character Development, Sentient Burial Mounds, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Except the people who deserve to, WIP)

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15. Fic I'm looking for: a royalty au, LWJ POV, LWJ is the prince, it's a one shot, WWX and LWJ are friends or at least have a close relationship throughout. I don't remember what status WWX is but I know for sure he's not a servant cuz there is pass in the fic where LWJ says WWX helps the palace staff even though he doesn't have to. WWX basically acts as a waiter for a little bit during this royal ball and that's where the confession happens in front of everyone. Not Desiderium. Thank you so much

FOUND? How to propose to the love of your life in one simple step by CloudyInk (G, 6k, WangXian, Royalty, LXC is King, Prince LWJ, General WWX)

~*~

16. Hello, this is the first time I do not know if this info will be enough. I read a modern au short fic before in which wwx have a terrible eye sight and memory. Every time he goes to Lan house he will go somewhere different from what he is looking for. Like he is supposed to go to a restroom but ended up in a kitchen. Lan Qiren then said to LWJ that his boyfriend might be a thief because he is always found somewhere he did not say he will go. Then when lqr visited lwj and wwx's house, he found out that wwx got lost even to his own house. Like he cannot even find the mug and lwj has to say where it is. Lwj then said to lqr that it is because wwx got into an accident when he was a child, the same day he lost his parents. That is the reason for his terrible memory and eye sight. After that, lqr became soft to wwx. And every time Wangxian visited the Lan house. He will help wwx find what he is looking for.

Thank youuu @yunshenlianhua

~*~

17. Hii mods , can you help me find this fics

A) it's time travel but here WWX gave up on cultivation world while whole cultivation world needs his help to defeat wen ruohan....?? I guess everyone is back from past ?? Now sure

B) I don't know where I read this fic ...and don't knew if fic like this exists where after Wuxian's death he is in ghost city but in child form with having same mind as child he later get adopted by hualian they raise him once again he remember nothing till the day in his (new )16 year old body he sees the newly ascended God lwj

C) I don't remember much but I guess it mpreg and has twin lsz n Jingyi but they have lwj because he is busy ? Or just not there with them..I am confused

Sry to ask this many at once but help me ..this half reads are living rent free in my mind @selflovingmedj

17A)

FOUND? The Line Between Good and Evil by Dandelion_sama (G, 34k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, What-If, Rebirth, Time Travel, kind of Mass Reborn, reverse uno, Canon-Typical Violence, WIP)

~*~

18. Hey! Do you remember a fic where a-yuan gets sick and WWX brings him to the cloud recesses for treatment? There was a heart wrenching scene where wwx asked the lan sect to take a-yuan in and raise him. I can't seem to find it. Thanks in advance!

FOUND! the kite string and the anchor rope by fleurdeliser (M, 38k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, set after the yiling date, Sick Child, the illness never gets worse than it is in the first 1000 words)

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19. hi! I'm looking for a case/curse fic, post-canon/getting together - which features wangxian & the gusu lan/juniors solving a case in a cursed town. iirc, the curse is related to a wish granting ritual at a yearly festival, and i believe lwj had visited this festival before in the previous year and wished for wwx's return. thank you! @patchworkpotatoes

FOUND! 爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie (E, 68k, WangXian, Case Fic, Blood and Injury, Demons, Body Horror)

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20. Hi! I'm here for fic finder request. I'm sure I bookmark the story but couldn't find it. It was set in the Cloud Recesses study arc where Wei Ying grow up with the Lan. Wangxian is engaged with each other. I remember that Jin Zixuan was jealous when Jiang Yanli and Wei Ying start to get close while they were in cloud recesses. Nie Huaisang told Jin Zixuan and Jiang Cheng that WX are engaged and they were shocked because they thought wangxian are cousins. Sorry if my explanation is a mess and I hope you can help me find it. Thank you! @mayuchi96

FOUND! what a strange life by dass22 (dass15) (T, 26k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Friendship, POV Alternating, mostly from JC pov tho)

~*~

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic finder #wangxian fic search #the untamed #wangxianficfinder #long post

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transfurbysex · 22 days

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IRL I'm a switch right? Meaning I have a handful of submissive trans women I beat/degrade/top on a semi regular basis...lately I've been so obsessed with thinking about my partners finding out about this blog and getting together to dom me...

Fakeboy gangrape kinda storytime beneath cut <3

At first they'd be disgusting! Totally betrayed by the idea that the "man" topping them has been a cis woman lying her way up their skirts. Until they see the transfem supremacy tag...each of their cocks jumping at hearing how their dom their top their master their owner is sooo fucking desperate to serve girlcock! Their eyes go wide hearing all the disgusting ways I want them to treat me. It's not long before they're planning the best way to destroy me together.

I'm invited over by one of my partners, my little play bag in hand. I'm immediately ambushed at the door, three of my subs grabbing me and pinning me down beneath them... they've always admired my strength but are quickly realizing how truly weak I am compared to them. I'm confronted with my blog. With all the terrible borderline fetishy things I say about trans women...and most importantly all the posts about how I'm not even a real man.

I try my hardest to explain it's all just fantasy and a trauma based kink but it's not long before my mouth is silenced with a throbbing cock. My sweetest most submissive partner choking me on her dick "Your blog is right...disgusting little trender chasers like you deserve to be raped by real women like us."

One by one they subject me to torture, often using my own toys and techniques on me. Flogging me, beating me, caning my ass, and stuffing me with load after load of their cum. Raping me in every hole while reminding me what a terrible pervert I am for having such transphobic fantasies about them!! How disgusted they are by me! How they're gonna tell every girl they know that I'm a freeuse toy to fuck whenever...afterall fakeboys can't give consent!! That from now on I'm gonna be their sub at all times...living to serve them however they deem fit!!

At the end they take good care to document my beaten raped body...close ups of my bleeding lips and galing holes...my cum filled pussy and pathetic sad eyes. My once sweet docile submissive narrating "This hole WAS a member of the trans community but after being exposed as a filthy chaser lying for some girlcock we took matters into our own hands and made sure this cissy faggot would never hurt any of us again! Her phone number and address is as follows... If any of you want a turn feel free to harass HER until SHE surrenders her body to you! Don't worry about knocking her up... we're pretty sure we took care of that already hehe!"

#fakeboy story #fakeboy #ftm misgendering #t4t misgendering #transfem supremacy #trans supremacy kink #ftm girl #misgender kink #detrans kink #ftm detrans kink

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our-aroace-experience · 3 months

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Hi! I was on the asexual tag saw this blog and just wanted to see if anyone else who is aspec can relate to my ramblings. Rambling tldr: not claiming a label despite that label actually relating to my experiences because it just doesn't fit perfect enough and because it doesn't fit perfect enough in my mind I don't think I want to use it.

Now, back in 2020 I claimed being 'asexual' by name and then a couple of months later claimed being aroflux which eventually changed to 'greyaro' over a year later. And those two terms fit me the best, grey aro ace is me. However, because I'm greyaro I still feel romantic attraction though it is rare but its still present enough in my mind to continually be wondering about what label to put it as. For the most part, I don't have a label even when the attraction - romantic/sensual/alterous/aesthetic - arises. Which again doesn't rise often, but I daydream about it a lot or reminisce about old crushes - particularly the one about a girl way back in high school days. (Let me tell you that was a wild time in my mind). Back then I was thinking I was bisexual only to cancel it out because I didn't want to have sex with her. However I never questioned if I wanted to have sex with boys (I just assumed I would, thanks heteroallonormativity). But the romantic feelings I had for her were the same like the boy crushes (which came up every few years). And for a timeline purposes, before her my last crush (boy) was in the 7th grade, she was the 11th grade, and my last crush currently was senior year of undergrad college (the best one honestly I could actually talk to him and not be overly ridden with anxiety and embarrassment). And despite so many years passing I always wonder - does the bi label fit? Was that with her an bi experience? I know its whatever I feel like it was but also I'm wondering if my hesitation is because deep down having that bi label attached makes the 'im not straight' thought more permanent? If that makes sense? Like 'im not straight' in any way, not even hetero aro/ace? And maybe that thought just makes my head spin a little. I thought about the pan label too; but when I read the definition to see the differences between bi and pan I realized that pan definition doesn't connect the closest but bi does. However I still can't always make it fit. It's like when I was going by aroflux despite the fact it did not fit for me, it was clunky in my brain calling myself that. But then I read about grey-aromantic and it fit perfect! But not my romantic orientation is still in murky waters; I ID as a girl so for the most part of my life boys have been what I've been romantically attracted to, however hetero isn't me. I usually just go as fluid for all my attraction titles which I do like but that opens up more discussion of "okay, but who, what gender?" So in that case I guess bi would be the correct answer...despite the fact gender doesn't play a part (hence fluid label I go with and or queer) but it isn't all genders I fall for, I lean in some directions more than others. So it kind of does, doesn't it? But again I'm like "....meh it just doesn't fit/doesn't fit the way I want." And I am one of those people who agree that you don't have to use every label or any label including micro (for example, aegosexual I can relate to but I don't feel the need to have two microlabels) however, once I start thinking in depth I start to question myself as I do because I'm a thinker. And I think a lot because in real life I'm not in the space where I can speak about this openly with the people in my life.

Wonder if anyone else has had something like this on and off throughout their life too?

Thanks for listening~

you can be bi and greyromantic at the same time, if that helps! but not wanting labels is totally valid and if that feels best then go for it!

#our aroace experience #aroace asks #aromantic #asexual #aro #ace #aroace #aro pride #ace pride #long post

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szarolina · 9 months

Text

intro

Witam! I had been lurking in the studyblr community before I left Tumblr a few years ago. Yet here I come again and hope I still fit since I'm not a student anymore. I hope we'll get along!

About

I'm Karolina and I'm 27 years old.

From Poland (with love ♡).

INTJ & 5w6 / 8w9

I'm a graduate of two Master degrees: 1) International Relations in Asia 2) Russian & Central Asian Studies. I'm currently writing two theses and hopefully finish them by December.

Next, I want to enroll in PhD program and focus on politics, economy and markets in East and Southeast Asia.

In the meantime I'm looking for a job in the field. I'm thinking of an analyst of the area (just Asia or better Eurasia so it would cover both my degrees), but mixing it with academic path, so while pursuing PhD degree.

One of my hobbies are foreign languages! Over time of my education I've managed to learn English, French, Russian and I'm still learning Japanese (currently at B1+ level). I used to learn Mandarin Chinese, but I intend to get back to it at some point. Also, I'm interested in picking Korean.

I like learning often just for sake of it since my mind needs to be constantly on the go (it gave me sleepless nights several times). It could be picking some textbook (I learnt bases of macroeconomics by myself), doing some online quizes on all seas, gulfs and straits or reading a popular history/science books (because of the Oppenheimer movie, I bought "The Making of the Atomic Bomb" by Richard Rhodes and yes, that's my current read!). I just enjoy it.

I have a never-ending books list on my Goodreads account (2600+ and counting). I like nonfiction (history, biography, political science, business, economics, you name it) and catching up on classics. Also, a h u g e Nabokov fan.

I'm one of these people who need to write everything down, from day schedule, important dates and tasks to all kinds of lists, trackers and brain dump. My Filofax is with me everywhere I go.

In general, I tend to be super-organized and put together. That applies to my daily or at least weekly schedule, surroundings or appearance - otherwise I can't properly focus.

I can't live without good coffee and I'm very picky about it.

Blog

The plan is to make it more personal by posting original content: hopefully daily, realistically a few times per week - mostly covering my writing proccess and languages learning, but also other random things. I intend to reblog some posts too, but I wish to keep the balance between that and OC.

Tagging #szarolina and #karolinatalking

My inbox is always open! c:

#studyblr #studyspo #langblr #studyblr introduction #studyblr intro post #studying #study

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femmespoiled · 2 years

Note

I'm new to the lesbian scene, I was jw what do butch and femme really mean? (Regarding your post yesterday)

Hi! I'm sorry I took a couple days to get to this, I've been wondering how to best, in the most complete way, address this, in the sense that I've answered this a few times and I keep adding more and more each time, it never seems like quite enough. I talked to my girlfriend, a fellow femme about this and she told me "I was thinking that you could surely write it just from your head and heart!" and she's right, I could, but to talk about these identities and pass only the subjectivity of my experiences and the bit of knowledge I have wouldn't do it justice. I will talk about it from those angles though, don't worry. I thought I could share bits and pieces of books that helped shape me into the femme I am today, I have mentioned those before, but I found myself with too many pieces, over 90, and I think that's too many for one post, so here and now I will promise to share those with you, not in this post, but in this blog and I believe sharing different experiences will help the general understanding. I am only one femme and my experience isn't universal, so we shall share the knowledge.

I have answered a similar ask before, here , hopefully the link works, if I miss anything, my butch/femme tag is also here, there I have a lot of resources there.

Butch and femme are complex and subjective identities (there are so many ways to be butch and femme , it's not one size fits all because everyone is a little different), and it's important to me that I don't diminish them into aesthetics, because I want people the understand that the center of butch and femme isn't looks.

Here's the center of these identities for me, what unifies us all, regardless of subjectivity, is that at the end of the day they are about community, about being there for each other, about taking care of each other, about finding safety in each other's arms when the world is still shitty towards you, about protecting one another in any way that you can and making sure they feel that sense of belonging in our community. Butch and femme are two sides of the same coin facing struggles and fighting to protect our counterparts however we need to.

In this case, I'll talk about these identities in lesbian communities.

Butch is authentic, transgressive, beautiful is its own ways, it's taking masculinity that for a long time was seen as only belonging to men and making it their home, their comfort, finding their true self there and giving it their very own meanings, much like femmes' femininity, their masculinity isn't one size fits all and it shows itself in different ways. Femme, for me, is taking femininity and making it your own, presenting yourself for others in your community, femme is strong, it's brave, it's fierce, it's demanding when we need it to be, it's making your voice heard for your sake and for others, because that's the important bit, it's all about community. Femme is being safety and community to butches and vice versa. Being femme is being proud. Femme is taking care of your community, it's making a home together where we all belong.

Butch and femme are about subversion and belonging.

It's not that without a butch I am not femme, or that we're necessarily attached, it's that their existence fosters my femmeness and brings it to its full potential, my place of belonging. Butches in general bring us something to contrast against while going both in the same direction.

The notion of that dynamic is important in its existence and application, regardless of romantic inclinations, the contrast, the mutual support and protection and uplifting, still should exist, being possible and necessary, while in a butch for butch or femme for femme, butch or femme4both relationship, etc.

Therefore those identities meet in their very own representation of lesbian gender and being there for each other.

Now I want to address a few misunderstandings I've seen about these identities*:

- you don't have to be tall to be a butch. There are no height restrictions in the butch identity, as far as I'm concerned. Short butches are still butches and beyond valid, your height doesn't determine how butch you are. The inverse is also true, femmes do not have to be short and petite, no height restrictions for us either.

- you don't have to be attracted to butches to be femme or to femmes to be butch, again not a requirement, but it's important to understand this is your community, regardless of romantic inclinations, the mutual support and protection and uplifting are deeply rooted in these identities, that is important.

- butch doesn't equal top/femme doesn't equal bottom. Butches do not have to be tops, butches do not have to be dominant, butches are not aggressive, at least none of the ones I know and have read about, butches don't have to have these characteristics attributed to "traditional"/stereotypical masculinity. These can be harmful stereotypes at times. Neither are femmes inherently submissive and agreeable to everything.

- in talking sexuality, stone butch and stone femme identities/dynamics/relationships are actually healthy and reciprocal, they're not selfish. And those boundaries should be respected. I have more about these in the butch/femme tag.

- femmes aren't always gender confirming. It is very frustrating for me that people still believe this, I'd say, more often than not, femmes are gender nonconforming, we can have complicated relationships with gender just like butches.

- you don't have to be physically strong to be butch. The butch identity isn't about your muscles. While I'm here talking about bodies, butches and femmes don't have to be white and thin, people of colour who have those identities are amazing, fat butches and femmes are such an important part of our community and history. Oh and disabled butches/femmes, you are so loved and valid.

In fact, when I talk about butch identity towards people of colour it reminds me of this piece from Persistence: All Ways Butch and Femme:

hopefully readable, though I think you have to click on them to do so

- continuing, femme isn't hyper feminine all the time or even at all for some of us, butch isn't rough and tough and hyper masculine all the time or again, even at all. And that goes into what i said, those identities aren't looks, some femmes find comfort in hyper femininity, some femmes have a different version of their own femininity and that's okay, same goes for butches, there isn't a requirement of how masculine or feminine you have to be, masculinity and femininity are what you make of it, these concepts go through our experiences in life, our notions of self, etc.

- oh mind you, for some authors the idea of butch and therefore femme, in and of itself, is beyond the cisnormative standards. All of this to say, trans butches and femmes, you belong here. You're part of our history, to say that you don't is to ignore the importance and the work the trans community put in to get us here.

- butches can do whatever they want with their hair, wearing makeup doesn't make them less butch, not wearing makeup doesn't make femmes less femme, having short hair doesn't make femmes less femme, wearing clothes not traditionally considered feminine doesn't make you less femme.

At the end of the day each butch and femme are unique, you won't ever find one exactly like the other and that's what makes those identities beautiful.

*Of course I'm not covering all of them, there are just so many, but here's a few I've seen a lot and that were pointed out to me.

ID under keep reading.

ID: image 1 - text reading:

"While focusing on demonstrating butch and female masculinity's epistemological origins, many feminist theorists have interpreted butch as a way of "knowing, interpreting, and doing lesbian gender." Ontologically, these lesbian genders are seen as being "concerned with having an identity, and a kind of true self." Some understand it as both socially constructed "gender performance" and others as representing an essentialized heterosexual, biological, male identity that merely clones the referent. The expressions of one's gendered butch identity are intrinsically linked to culture and race. In Davis and Kennedy's classic Boots of Leather, Slippers of Gold: The History of a Lesbian Community, they describe "a new style of butch, a woman who dressed in working-class male clothes for as much of the time as she possibly could, and went to the bar every day, not just on weekends. She was also street wise and fought back physically when provoked by straight society or by other lesbians." The political significance of this emergence lies in the visibility lesbians gained in the 1940s and '50s as World War II reshaped the American landscape, changing women's roles in relationship to work, gender, and family. Butch was a site of resistance to the heteronormative limitations on women. It was a place to embrace one's identity in a public way that allowed for alignment between the public and private self, a way of claiming space with your very presence. There is a long-standing history of butch representations that have helped solidify the iconic image of today's butch. The icon of butch identity was fashioned through historical narratives, poetry, biography, and classic novels such as Radclyffe Hall's The Well of Loneliness, written in 1928 and long considered the most well-known lesbian novel, The Beebo Brinker Chronicles from Ann Bannon, which moved butch into mainstream consciousness in the 1950s, and Leslie Feinberg's Stone Butch Blues, set in the pre-Stonewall era of the 1960s, which solidified the archetype. This "butch raging bull, as Halberstam argues, is meant to "offer masculinity a new champion" drawing on the iconography of the white male boxer. These works created a narrative for what and how butch looks and feels that still holds significant cultural power today. The external signifiers - the class and racial location of these historical accounts and cultural references to bars and customs - locate butch identity. This locating of butchness within a specific culture, class, race, and ethnicity makes it difficult for the masculine of centre person of colour to enter into the narrative without their gender presentation, specifically their version of masculinity, being questioned. Attempts to disrupt this sense of "classical" butch continue to rely on representations and cultural location within whiteness and white notions of masculinity and femininity. As Halberstam points out, there is cultural value in marginalizing masculinities that divert from the master narrative. Even though Halberstam is speaking to heteronormative masculinity here, these diverting narratives have the potential to "dilute" the "authoritative power" of white butchness in the same way. As this narrative is pushed into the mainstream queer consciousness to construct butch identity, many of our experiences are left out. Supporting versions of masculinity that we enjoy and trust, many of these "heroic masculinities" depend absolutely on the subordination of alternative masculinities. This role of the dominant narrative being constructed and circulated while simultaneously preventing alternative narratives is an important factor in establishing fixed understandings of female masculinity and butch."

Image 2 - text reading:

“Halberstam goes on to address female masculinity's relation to whiteness and identifies it as a site of inquiry for "cultural studies" yet does not venture down the road of how the relationship to race critically alters female masculinity as a concept. The challenge in theorizing butch gender and identity is that to determine how it operates, you have to locate it within certain bodies and cultural and sexual practices. These various locations, when analyzed, become fixed and static through the work of the writer exploring their creation and development. A central argument in Female Masculinity is that masculinity "becomes legible as masculinity where and when it leaves the white male middle-class body." While a considerable amount of the analysis explores when and where the narrative departs from the male body, less attention is given to when and where it departs from whiteness. Unlike white female masculinity, female masculinity for womyn of colour is based on sites of power and systemic oppression - through masculinities of colour. The assumption that they can be resignified with equal subversive and revolutionary actions against white manhood is false. The ability to access masculinity pivots upon the ways in which gender intersects with race, and these gaps have been filled with many new ways of naming ourselves. In the last decade, the explosion of young masculine-of-centre womyn has created a demographic shift on the butch landscape, giving way to terms like "stud," "boi," "tom," and "macha" in California and the South, "dom" within the DC, Maryland, and Virginia region, and "aggressives," or "AGS" in New York. These identities represent a redefined female masculinity that is rooted in the experiences of womyn of colour and is more genderqueer than historical interpretations of butch. For some this raises the question: "What is happening to all of our butches?" I think this evolution highlights the fact that, for many of us who came of age ten or twenty years ago, and even called ourselves butches, we never felt fully rooted in that language and space. As a community, we have the opportunity to respond with an open heart to this evolution, ensuring that the legacy of butch as a social, political, and personal space continues to grow and thrive. But we must also concede its limitations. The title of this piece, "Masculine of Centre, Seeks Her Refined Femme," is a heading from the first dating profile posted using the term "masculine of centre." It speaks to both a historical legacy of butch-femme and a longing for a language different and new.”

END ID

#bellas butch/femme tag #ask #FAQ #sharing the knowledge series

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simplegenius042 · 5 months

Text

OCs as Tragic Love Archetypes

Tagged by @adelaidedrubman.

Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @direwombat @strangefable @josephslittledeputy @wrathfulrook @cassietrn @chazz-anova @shallow-gravy @g0dspeeed @inafieldofdaisies @derelictheretic @ec-10 @gaeadene @strafethesesinners @minilev @carlosoliveiraa @afarcryfrommymain @ladyoriza @a-rose-in-a-garden-of-weeds @voidika @onehornedbeast @deputy-morgan-malone @vampireninjabunnies-blog @neverthesameneveranother @snake-in-the-garden @henbased @nightbloodbix and @thewanderer-000

You can find the uqiz here.

Samuel Who (The UnTitledverse)

Lucifer's advisor in the Pride Ring of Hell and often balances the line between designated caretaker and younger brother figure. Samuel's soul was unfairly sent to Hell by a wicked man by the name of Edward Carmine, ending Samuel's existence on the mortal realm before it could progress further. Samuel has had time to adjust to Hell's rules and his position, and is on his way to opening up more to the lifestyle, the denizens and his companions.

Nadi Sinclair (Far Cry The Silver Chronicles)

After her childhood had been ripped away from her and later losing loved ones in Task Force 141 due to Shepard and Shadow Company's betrayal, Nadi had left the task force and proceeded to find a life off the grid, her distrust and disgust towards the greed and warmongering in the American Government eventually drawing her to the Project at Eden's Gate, where she meets the charming (if sometimes frustrating) John Seed. He brings forth feelings that she never got to feel as a child nor as a soldier, and yet, has a massive fear of losing him (whether to forces outside of her control or because of her own self-perceived vices and flaws), leading her to only adore from afar. This becomes ten-times worse when she meets a newly single Holly Pepper, a pragmatic and devoted, if sometimes snarky, member of Eden's Gate. This bisexual disaster has two free hands but can't grab for shit. I think this fits her perfectly.

Sonya, The Apex (Life, Despair & Monsters)

So I've decided to give Sonya mommy issues, which may or may not contribute in her attraction and her (initially unhealthy) relationship with Jennifer (granted, Jennifer is helping matters). Though both learn that, below their hard-shelled and rotten surfaces, are two people capable of loving each other beyond manipulation and usefulness. But that makes them an unholy matrimony obsessed with each other instead so there's no telling whether it has made them better or worse.

And lastly...

Azriel (Wings And Horns, Far Cry The Silver Chronicles)

Azriel has never really had a great experience with love. She is the reincarnation of Joseph Seed's daughter after all. A reincarnation she earned by serving the concept of Death itself for either one hundred or one thousand years. She came back into the world a decade after her original death, and was born into a home that didn't understand her, and the forced transition into Eden's Gate didn't make it any better. Even worse when her parents attempted to sacrifice her during the Reaping to show their devotion. Thankfully, she meets Silva, who shapes and mellows out the young girl into a brilliant young woman who would make Jannah proud. There's also her massive and obvious crush on Gavin's mite (re: a Tumultite word for "child"), Schrödinger Turquoise.

#oc quiz #the untitledverse #oc: samuel who #a hazbin hotel/helluva boss oc #far cry the silver chronicles #oc: nadi sinclair #a fc5 and cod oc #predominantly she's apart of the original modern warfare trilogy (well just 1 & 2) to have the timeline make sense and i like those more #but i might add elements of the new franchise because that has some good things too #life despair & monsters #oc: sonya the apex #ld+r sonnie #wings and horns #original work #oc: azriel

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sorcerous-caress · 4 months

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You're right and I know you are but I actually got so upset that I am now violently sick. I am literally only sharing this because I am fairly certain you're also autistic and BPD but I hate so much that like the one time in mainstream media we are given a bi/pan man who is effeminate and prefers men but isn't a derogatory stereotype but every post about him is like He’s The Most Masculine, Actually and actually the reason we don't see him express attraction to women is because he's so shy actually ignore that he can hookup with Laezel who would not stand for that and is main character trait is confident (and I don't think I've started fights so at least there's that)

I used to not understand the problem with the Astarion fandom but then I came to painful realization he has straight fans who actually seem to hate his canon character

Anyway sorry for all the Bobstarion… gay bpd bitches are gay bpd bitching. You're the best for reading this tho 😭💀💚

I know this feeling very well anon.

You've completely summed it up, he is finally a non-derogatory representation of an effeminate queer man and straight fans burnt his canon to the ground so they can make their dream masculine babyboy shy twink.

God it fucking stings doesn't it? It literally hurts just to think about how much Larian risked by even putting Astarion in the game. A western game at that too where forum after forum are full of incels complaining about women not being inflatable sex objects in their game.

Baldur's gate 2 and 1 never was this inclusive, it was strictly hetro except for the remastered npcs. Astarion by himself probably made them lose half their "old-school" homophonic demographic.

And the fandom takes all of that and makes him another fucking joke of a character? All the people who have never played the game would search up the Astarion tag and get a completely wrong impression of him.

Not once did a character before him made me leave a game because I was disgusted with myself. His storyline and writing is phenomenal because I too objectified him at the start then the game called me out for it in act 3 and it changed my world view so much.

God did you know early access had Gale and Wyll be awkward if a male Tav hits on them? That only Astarion was the always accepting person regardless of gender?

Even now he is still the only male character between the two who openly expresses his interest in men! Who embraces being flamboyant and doesn't try to fit into a narrative.

I completely understand anon, and I know how much bpd and autism highlights these feelings and make them dig like nails at your brain. Yes I have them too. And I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share your thoughts with me.

It must be more frustrating for you tho, for liking Astarion and being lumped in with the rest of his weird fans without your consent. You can't even filter their posts out because they treat their takes as "normal" and how it's not them belittling a queer character no! They're just being "wholesome"

Fuck the batstarion shit still gets on my nerves. I saw one with a baby bottle feeding him??? It just feels so infantilising because he isn't some cute animal he is a fully grown and matured person. If it's just a kink then sure idc but please tag it at least.

Then they make him "shy" around women. You know why that god awful take was probably born? Because most of his straight fans picked women and went into his romance. So they think that his clumsy personality in act 2 is because they're a woman and he is so used to men.

It's fucking disgusting, Astarion would treat both men and women with the same clumsy romance, all my Tavs were nonbinary and he never treated them differently.

You have every right to feel this way, you have every right to be furious at this. Especially with a character you care about so much.

But people will take advantage of that, people who want to start fights for the sake of fights or drama blogs who are itching to make a callout post. People don't like others poking holes in their logic no matter how good your intentions are.

Homophobia exists, racism too, look at how ignored Wyll is by these supposed fans. Look at how popular Gale x Astarion is than x Wyll because both of them are white.

It's okay to vent and it's okay to feel frustrated and stuck. God knows during some bpd episodes I come very close to deleting this blog bc of the smallest of reasons, so Imagine actually having a valid reason to be mad like you.

Take a step back, fuck those people honestly. Fuck anyone who ever did this shit just for their own self indulgence, who left all the media that panders to straight people and came and took Astarion too just to strip him of all of his traits and put him in the hetro box.

So leave them be, they suck, they're shitty and never willing to listen. Don't waste your frustration on them, it's better to yell at a wall, at least, unlike them, it might reply back with something productive one of those days.

Again, I hope you feel better soon. I genuinely do, these feelings suck beyond words can describe. Do something you like or revisit your favourite works that stay true to Asterion's character. Ground yourself with anything that might help.

Don't feed them or reply to their arguments, please. hopefully, they leave the fandom once the new manufactured tumblr sexyman is released and the Asterion tag.

#♡bob #♡bob Slander

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