#[ usually the big plants are WAY out of my budget ]

[despairforme]

[werecreature-addicted]

Nature's medicine

this is my first time writing something long-form like this so if you don't like it take me out back and shoot me like ol Yeller.

werewolf!OC x gn! reader

warnings: smut, Aphrodisiacs, mentions of being sick, and poisonings, reader is gender neutral, and their parts aren't mentioned but they bottom.

word count: 4,300

summary: you've made it through the winter, the hardest part of the year for you and now the gentile, bountiful spring is here. You're an apothecary who collects plants in the wild to make medicines and tea to help soothe. Gabriel is a werewolf and a guard for a nobleman passing through the town you live. Gabriel knows two things the instant he sets his eyes on you first, he wants you, second, you spend your time in the woods gathering poison.

Spring was one of your favorite times of the year, it was always stressful to try and make it through winter when you already had so little to get by on, but with spring came opportunities. You could plant in your garden again, you could forage in the woods for edible plants and most of all it was bearable to be outside with the snow melted and the warm sun high in the sky.  You made a decent living, selling herbs and medicinal plants but that meant that you needed to save every year for the winter when the plants you sold were fewer and farther between. It was nice to have a bit more breathing room with your budget now. 

You were combing through the forest behind your house making a mental note of patches of wild greenery that looked promising when you found something truly delightful. A patch of long-stemmed helmet-shaped purple flowers. You knelt down next to the blooms and examed them closely. Wolfsbane. it was incredible to find some blooming this early in the year it usually didn’t show up until mid to late summer. You smiled and started collecting the deadly little plants. As far as most people knew, you sold medicine and spices only harmless plants. However if customers came looking for something a little more potent and had the right price, you’d been known to carry poisonous plants as well, and really there were so many more deadly plants than ones that were harmless.  

You covered the Wolfsbane with a cloth and piled chamomile flowers and sage on top and made your way down to the river that ran through the forest and started looking at the thick weeds that grew on the river bed. Nothing interesting. you didn’t think you’d see anyone in the forest but it never hurt to be careful.  You lived apart from the rest of your small town right on the edge of the woods away from the main clearing where most towns folk lived and worked. You didn’t mind the solitude, if anything you preferred it, you didn’t know if you could put up with noisy or rude neighbors. That being said, you were used to being completely alone when you were in your home or the woods that surrounded it. So when you heard the sound of men calling out to one another you froze.  You looked worriedly in the direction the voices were coming from and wondered if you should run.

Suddenly you were panicking, what if they found you collecting poisons? Oh god, what if they’d found out you were selling poisons and they were coming to arrest you? You were overcome with fear but surely if you ran you’d look all the more guilty. You saw the leaves shake on the far end of the river the choice was made for you, there would be no time to run, and you’d simply have to hold your ground. 

Two men pushed through the foliage and stopped short seeing you. One was dressed in leather armor and had a sword at his side, he was clearly a guard of some kind, big and well-muscled. The other man was slender and dressed in expensive-looking clothes, he must be the one being guarded. 

“Hello!” the nobleman called and quickly made his way over to you, you held your basket tightly but did not run. 

“Hello, do you live nearby?” He asked, enthusiastically, his guard remaining stoic.

“Yes, is there something I can help you with?” you asked cautiously. 

“My carriage broke down on the main road I was looking for help or a nearby town but My compatriot and I seemed to be lost,” he laughed. Very lost you’d say, the main road was quiet away from here. You relaxed a little. Of course, they weren’t here to arrest you, just a rich man and his guard lost on their journey. 

“I can lead you back to the main road from here,” you offered and turned to lead them but the guard spoke stopping you. 

“Wait,” he commanded and you froze looking back at him he was giving you a strange look you couldn’t place. “What's your name?” he asked. Before you could answer the first man interrupted. 

“Oh, how rude! We didn’t even introduce ourselves, I’m Count Ivan Richman and this is my knight Gabriel it's an honor to make your acquaintance my lady,” he said tripping over some roots to kiss your hand.  You introduced yourself curiously, Gabriel didn’t have any other questions for you, so you lead them back the way you’d come. It became clear to you extremely quickly that Gabriel was extremely competent, he moved easily over the uneven terrain of the forest floor without much effort and fell in step beside you. Ivan on the other hand could hardly put one foot in front of the other without tripping over himself. It took a lot longer than you were anticipating to just get back to your modest cottage. 

“Follow this trail until you hit the main town someone there should be able to help you with your carriage,” you said giving the Count a slight curtsy. 

“You've been such a help, I’ll have to find a way to repay you,” he said beaming at you.

“You really don’t have to,” you protested, 

“No, we will find a way to repay you,” Gabriel said, which surprised you, he’d been mostly silent the entire time you’d been walking. He pulled a flower out of seemingly nowhere and laid it on top of your basket before turning away from you and walking down the path you’d indicated. You watched them as they left before looking down at the flower he’d given you, a bright yellow Dafodil, a flower signifying spring. 

–

You loved spring, but it was also such a busy season for you, it felt like every second of the day there was something you ought to be doing. Drying flowers and leaves for tea, planting spinach or strawberries, mixing medicines, or digging up roots in the woods. You worked late into the night and when you finally did go to sleep, it was hard to get yourself back up in the morning to do it all over again. 

The sun streaming in brightly through your windows warmed your bedsheets, you’d already slept in too much if the sun was this high in the sky, but that just seemed all the more reason to stay in bed. Who knows how long you would have stayed in bed like that, wasting the day away, but there was a sudden knock at the door, and in a flash, you were out of bed and dressed, you don’t think that you’d ever moved that quickly in your life, but you were at the door in a respectable amount of time and opened it warmly to greet your visitor. 

It was Gabriel, you were a little surprised to see him, you’d thought he and Ivan had forgotten all about you. Looking at him now you couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit intimidated again. He towered over you and his broad frame took up almost all of the door frame, he didn’t have a sword with him but he was still in armor, you imagined that if he wanted to he could do some damage with just his hands. Despite all this, he was handsome he had dark hair that curled at the ends, and he kept having to brush it out of his face, you wondered if he had a wife or a betrothed, but you found yourself pushing the thought out of your head.

“Good morning!” you greeted cheerfully, you tried for a smile but Gabriel didn’t return it, and you stopped. “How can I help you?” you asked, Gabriel looked around whirly and leaned in 

“Is there somewhere we can speak privately?” he asked in a hush. You nodded and pulled him into your storefront. 

“Is this better?” you asked, calmly you’d seen the apprehensive look in his eyes a hundred times in other people looking for poisons. You wondered if he was planning on killing Ivan, but you knew you couldn’t ask. 

“The other day, you were gathering Wolfsbane,” he said slowly, suddenly you were less calm. You shifted uneasily from foot to foot, 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you denied. You were sure that you’d covered the flowers before the two men had stumbled upon you. It would be one thing if he’d heard whispers of an apothecary who also sold poisons, but the fact he knew what poisons you had, left you rattled.  

“I could smell it in your basket,” he said. 

That shouldn’t have been possible, you’d been collecting tea flowers and herbs, even if he did catch a whiff of what you were collecting there he was no way he could have smelled the wolfsbane, how could he identify it?

“You must be confused, I had camomile in my basket that day, I’d have no reason to collect a plant like a wolfsbane,” you doubled down. He took a step toward you and you jumped back, Gabriel froze and held his hands up placatingly to show he meant you no harm. 

“Maybe a human would be confused, but I’m a werewolf, my senses are better than yours. I can smell that you’ve kept it,  I don’t care that you’re making poisons in fact I’d like to buy one from you,” he explained. You felt your heart stop in your chest. A werewolf. Gabriel wasn’t nearly as violent as the stories had led you to believe. 

“Oh,” was all you could manage for a beat. You shook your head  “You said you wanted wolfsbane poison?” you turned your back to him and walked swiftly behind the counter, you knelt to the ground and lifted a floorboard, and selected a small vile from the hidden stash. You rose and showed him the vile

“Do you have anything smaller? I just need enough to make a person sick,” he said examining the bottle you offered him. You curled your hand around the bottle and pulled it back slightly. 

“You could have just asked for something to make you sick instead of going all out for poison,” you said, already thinking of what mix of plants you’d use, you supposed it would depend on what kind of sick he was looking for. 

“No,” he said shaking his head “werewolves are more resilient than humans, it has to be poison. If I make myself sick with Wolfsbane I won’t shift this full moon so I need just enough to make me sick, not enough to kill me,” he explained. You’d heard those werewolves took medicine to put off their lunar transformations, but you assumed it was some kind of magical concoction you were unfamiliar with, not some common position. 

“Right, just a moment,” you said, carefully you extracted a few drops of poison and put them into a separate container then added a diluent to help it go down smoother. You hesitated to give it to him. There wasn’t an antidote to wolfsbane if it was too much there would be nothing anyone could do. 

You weren’t sure why you cared so much, you’d sold poisons before, and you weren’t naive enough to think you weren’t in some way responsible for those murders committed but this felt different somehow, if he died it would be an accident and that made it different somehow. 

“You’ve done this before?” you asked cautiously. Gabriel shifted uncomfortably. No, he hadn’t.

“I know the measurements I should be fine,” he said. 

“I would feel more comfortable giving this to you if you allowed me to accompany you while you took it just so I could ease your pain while you were sick and do what I can to help,” you offered.  

“You’re braver than you look, asking to be alone with a werewolf during the full moon,” Gabriel responded, you didn’t think anyone could be that dangerous, werewolf or not if they were writing on the floor in pain. 

“I’ll make you a compromise,” he offered, “I’ll let you bring me medicine and make sure I’m alive, but you can’t stay.” you could live with that, you tilted the vile towards him and let him take it from your hands, your fingers brushing as he took it. He handed placed a small pile of gold coins on the counter, more than you usually charged but you figured you could keep the change if you were going to be making a house call. Gabriel gave you the address of where he would be staying on the night of the full moon, a remote home on the other edge of town, and promised he would open the door when you knocked. Then he left, and you got started on the rest of your busy spring day. 

–

You’d never paid much attention to the phase of the moon before, but now you were careful to check it every night, Gabriel had given you a date to look out for but his presence in your life had sparked a new curiosity in you. Aside from checking the moon, you started pulling out old apothecary books and looking for any mention of Lycanthropy. You found that werewolves would shift into a more animalistic wolf-like form on the night of the full moon unless they were sick or physically weakened, and yes Wolfsbane was a common poison used to achieve this effect. You also dug up all sorts of treatments commonly used to ease any pain left after shifting or to calm a werewolf’s potentially feral mind while they were in their wolf form. 

Over the course of the week while you were waiting for the moon to turn full you gathered a basket of things that you thought would help and medicines in small enough doses that he could treat himself. You left your home right at sunset. You knew the path well and had no trouble finding your way to the house Gabriel was staying at, Ivan had found other lodgings for tonight. 

By the time you reached the house, it was dark your path only illuminated by the full moon. It was kind of spooky, still, you’d come all this way, raised your hand to the door, and knocked. There was no response, and all at once you felt incredibly foolish, of course, he wouldn’t be able to answer the door, in the state he was in. You tried the door and it opened, so you let yourself in. 

The house was dark you blinked a few times to adjust your eyes to the lack of light. Eventually, you started walking through the house your hand on one wall to guide yourself. You called out for Gabriel once but there was no response you slowly checked each room, still cautious. You pushed a door open and there he was. 

You let yourself into the room and quickly went to his bedside, he was awake, breathing heavily in the throws of wolfsbane poisoning. You sat down on his bed and started taking in his appearance. His skin was a sickly pale shade, clammy to the touch and his eyes were bloodshot. He looked very ill, but he didn’t look like he was dying. That was good at least. 

You dampened a cloth and applied it to his forehead. “How are you feeling?” you asked softly. He reached out and grabbed your wrist and pressed your hand to his cheek. His skin felt disgustingly warm but you let him press his face into your palm. 

“I haven’t shifted, so it could be worse,” he croaked, his voice raspy. He looked up at you and his gaze softened. “You smell good,” he commented. You felt your face go hot, you didn’t know to respond to that, so instead you pretended like you hadn’t heard that. 

“Are you sore? How can I help you?” you asked lifting your basket of medicine up to the bed with your free hand. 

“You just being here feels good,” he breathed. Clearly talking to him wasn’t getting you anywhere. You studied him closely, only looking away when you realized he was looking at you just as intently. You took your hand from him and started digging through your medicines.

“Here, drink this,” you ordered handing him a vile of medicine. It should help settle his nerves and ease some of the pain. He tried to take the vile from you but it slipped out of his weak fingers, so you held it to his lips for him as he drank. It was odd, you’d been intimidated by Gabriel when you first met him, and when you’d seen him again that impression had solidified in your mind, now here he was laid out in bed unable to lift a bottle to his mouth. 

It wasn’t a completely fair comparison, you would probably be far worse in his position, if anything it was impressive that he was holding up this well. 

“Thank you,” he croaked, “I feel better already,” he assured you. 

“That shouldn’t be possible, it’ll take at least half an hour to feel the effects,” you said light-heartedly. Gabriel smiled weakly up at you, 

“Maybe it’s just you,” he said. You felt your face go hot again, you’d have to note that wolfsbane made the victim particularly flirty. The two of you fell into a peaceful silence. Gabriel drifted in and out of sleep and you stayed by his side monitoring his symptoms. It had been a while since you’d treated patients directly like this, you didn’t produce medicine strong enough to treat anything worse than a strong cold, normally your customers were concerned family members, and you kind of missed treating patients directly. 

“I know I told you, you couldn’t stay, but-” Gabriel spoke up before trailing off. He reached for you again but didn’t quite manage to take your hand again. You met him in the middle and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. 

“I’ll stay,” you promised. He was already looking better, and suddenly you weren’t sure if that was a good thing. if the point of taking Wolfsbane was to make him so sick he couldn’t shift, wouldn’t making him better make it so he could shift? But he still looked so ill, surely he wasn’t well enough to shift. besides you were a trained healer, you didn’t think you could just ignore a person in pain.

 Gabriel looked up suddenly very awake and sat up. 

“You really must be feeling better,” you laughed, he did look much better, not as sweaty or as pale. He pulled you around the waist and pulled you close, you tensed up as leaned into you, bringing his face close to your neck but he didn’t seem like he was trying to attach you, or even kiss your neck, he was just… smelling you. 

“The things I could do to you,” he murmured, again it didn’t sound like a threat it sounded more like lustful musings. 

“Gabriel?” you asked shakily as he nuzzled your shoulder. He seemed to snap back to reality and pulled away from you, but just slightly, he didn’t seem ready to let you go.  

“What was that that you gave me?” he asked, he sounded calm but his eyes were wide, you thought quickly back to what you’d given him. 

“A tea blend, green tea, crocus sativus, ginger, cinnamon-” you listed it was all just antioxidants, things that would help relieve pain, then you froze. Crocus stivus, saffron, was a natural aphrodisiac, but it was such a subtle effect it shouldn’t have affected him like this, it was such a small dose. Maybe because his immune system was already so weak things like a pinch of saffron could hit harder than you were expecting. 

“It’s an aphrodisiac,” you admitted, as you realized what had happened. “I’m sorry you said werewolves were more resilient I didn’t think you would notice let alone, well this,” you apologized profusely. 

“I wouldn’t have thought it would have hit me like this either if you had told me,” he said, and then he was looking at you again, intense and full of longing. A dark curl fell in front of his eyes, you wanted to brush it out of the way so he’d keep looking at you that way. 

“Maybe it’s just because it’s you here with me that I'm reacting this way,” he breathed, 

“What does that mean?” you asked, matching his quiet tone

“It means I’ve wanted you since the second I laid eyes on you, and I wouldn’t need an aphrodisiac to feel this pull toward you.”

Your heart pounded in your chest, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t desire him in the same way but this was just all so sudden. Still, when he asked if he could kiss you, you said yes. 

His mouth was warm but not feverish, it had been a long time since you’d been touched like this. It set your blood on fire. He pushed you backward laying you down. 

Gabriel grabbed your hips and jerked your body towards him. With a dull pang of horror, you realized that his fingers had stretched and turned into sharp claws, with thick black fur extending up his hands and arms. Before you could even gasp, he raked his claws over your chest ripping your clothes to shreds, but he somehow managed not to cut your skin. His mouth traveled down your neck to linger kisses over your now exposed chest. You couldn’t help but react to his touch, arching up to his mouth and moaning. You covered your mouth trying to quiet your own sounds of pleasure. 

“There's no one here but us, be loud I want to hear you,” Gabriel instructed pulling your hand away from your face and pinning it to the bed. You realized just how much bigger his hand was than yours, he could easily how both of your hands in one of his with room to spare. 

Heat pooled in your stomach when Gabriel's lips found the skin of your hips. He pulled off the rest of the shredded clothes and spread your legs while his tongue trailed over your loins. 

“Can I? Can I please?” he asked, begged, his eyes locked on yours. 

“Yes,” you breathed. Gabriel kissed your inner thigh before he let his lips touch the apex of your legs. You couldn’t help but thrash as his tongue tasted you. Gabriel gripped your hips so you couldn’t escape his mouth. He couldn’t seem to get enough of your sex he couldn’t seem to get enough of you. You gripped his hair holding him just as tightly as he was holding on to you. You realized his hair had turned into wiery fur, and his ears were sharp at the end. But the idea that a shifting werewolf was going down on you right now didn’t bother you nearly as much as it probably should have. Even with his grip you could squirm enough to buck your hips up into his mouth and you did so over and over again as he continued to pleasure you. 

“I’m going to cum,” you groaned, even with your warning he didn’t slow down, if anything he seemed to be edging you closer and closer to your climax like he wanted you to cum on his face. You threw your head back in pleasure as your orgasm overwhelmed you. Gabriel pulled back, his face more wolflike than when he’d first gone down on you, his tongue dripping in your cum. 

He stood up to his full height, His clothes had fallen off as his body contorted and changed. He palmed his cock in one clawed hand, bringing your attention to his arousal. Again, you felt like you should be scared or at least intimidated, but all you wanted was for him to be inside of you.

“Do you want to keep going?” you asked him. 

“More than anything,” he growled, He was so much larger than you his body easily dwarfed you, you could feel his hard cock press against your thigh as he positioned himself over you, up close you could see how his original features still showed through in his more monstrous form. His eyes were still human still kind. He pushed into and you savored the deep growl that reverberated in his chest as he felt your soft walls envelop him. He drew his hips back before slowly pushing back into you, his pace slowly increased as the two of you found a rhythm. You pulled him into a kiss, his sharp teeth threatened to cut your lips, but the slight danger only thrilled you. 

“It was like you were meant to take me,” he growled as his pelvis snapped toward yours. He pressed a clawed hand down on your stomach feeling the bulge that formed every time he thrust into you. You tried to speak to tell him that he was making you feel just as good but when you opened your mouth he pushed his tongue past your lips, muffling any attempt at speech. 

You could feel a coil of pleasure building inside of you threatening to snap for the second time tonight. You dug your nails into his back, raking your fingers through the patches of fur begging to spread over his skin. 

“I’m going to knot you going to fill you up and make you mine,” he growled you could tell he was getting close to his own release by the way his thrusts were becoming erratic and his labored breathing. You were right there with him. 

“Make me yours,” you moaned. You were close to a second orgasm, overwhelmed with the pleasure and his closeness. You came just a few moments before he gave one final thrust pushing his knot inside of you and reaching his own high. Gabriel groaned and collapsed back onto the bed, curling up beside you, holding you close. You wondered if Gabriel would stay in town long enough for you to help with the next full moon. 

[balkanradfem]

What it takes to grow little transplants in my apartment!

I'm starting my first plants of 2023, and I'm going to go thru every single step I have to take in order to have them grow! This is extremely diy, no budget, we use resources we find on the street, I picked out these seeds from a vegetable I got from a friend, type of thing.

The first step is creating the place to put the plants. They need to be inside where it's warm, but get as much light as possible. I have these big french windows in the kitchen, and it’s the place that gets the most light in the morning. I will often carry the plants to the other side of the apartment for the afternoon, especially if there's sunlight! I don't have enough space on the windowsills to put all the plants there, so I have to create a makeshift table for them.

Now the way I usually make a table is I go to the basement, pick out a board (I collect abandoned boards next to the trash), and put it on the top of a big cardboard box. The cardboard boxes can actually take a lot of weight, so they work fine as a table stand, especially if the board is heavy. I found the board I used the last year, and then realized, that my roommate took all of my cardboard boxes when she was moving out, and I do not have an appropriate box to use! I went outside to see if anyone had abandoned a cardboard box, and in about 10 minutes, I found one:

And this is how the construction works:

Now that is taken care of, I need to decide what seeds I'm planting. Have I ever shown you my seed box? This is my seed box:

It looks messy, but all of the seeds I collected are in little packets I made from envelopes, and then they're sorted into categories, and each category is kept together by a piece of elastics. I just had to take out the brassicas (kale, cabbage, broccoli) and some early tomatoes, peppers and basil. I decided to sow a lot of kale and cabbage, and 5-6 little dwarf tomatoes, they’re an early variety and they'll give produce as early as May! I've had both basil and peppers successfully grow, sown as early as January, so I'm taking a chance at them again. These plants may not make it, since there's not a lot of light yet, but if they do, they'll give me the earliest produce in the year, and it's worth the effort. If it doesn't work out, I'll sow them all again in February.

Now the next step is finding the containers for them; I have lots of both found and gifted stuff, but my favourites by far are the yogurt cups, they're the ideal size for a pepper or a kale plant, and I can just fit a lot of them next to each other! I'm also trying these tiny black containers, to see how I like them. I'm using the food container with a lid to grow basil, because I've noticed basil germinates more willingly in damp conditions, and once I close that lid, the water won't be able to evaporate. Also all these containers need to have a decent sized hole on the bottom!

Now before I go on to get the soil and start planting, I figured I should make the labels! Once my hands are dirty I will be unwilling to wash them just to cut some labels out. My labels are just a random piece of thin cardboard (like from a chocolate box) cut into a strip, and then I write the name of the plant there. Otherwise I will immediately forget what I planted where. These are short-lived, for a lasting one, I've seen people cut out plastic containers into strips, and write on them with a permanent marker, that would last! But I only need these temporarily, I don't mind if they decompose later.

Now, the soil! If I hadn't been prepared for this, I would have to go to the forest, or some area where a lot of leaves were decomposing, to get my soil, but I always remember to take some home in the fall, so I already have a bucket filled with soil here.

This bucket is great for it because it has a lid I can close, and soil can't dry out in there. Soil benefits a lot from being kept damp, so all of the useful bacteria can keep living inside it. If it goes dry, it loses a lot of its biodiversity! This specific soil is from the forest, dug from under a rotten tree trunk. There's a lot of clumps and pieces of bark and roots, so I'm taking a minute to clean it out a little, I'm taking bigger pieces out so they can't obstruct my little plants. When it's all good, I'm mixing it with some more water! Ideally, your soil would be nice and warmed up before you're about to plant, because seeds like warm soil to grow in. But, if it's not, you can cheat and mix it with warm water to warm it up!

Now to fill the containers:

And now I have all of them filled up, I can finally plant. These cabbage seeds on the picture are new and untried, I ordered them online because I want to try and make sauerkraut this year! I'm excited to see if they grow well.

The only thing you really need to know about sowing seeds, they're supposed to go twice as deep as they're wide. Since all these seeds are tiny, all I need to do is to gently push them under the soil, and then pepper some soil on top. Like this:

I put two seeds in each container, just in case. Now they're all sowed, I'm spraying them with water gently, so that the soil would properly settle on top of them. If you were to water them with pouring water, it could easily displace the seed, so it's recommended to just gently spray on top!

There's one more important step to this; all of these containers have holes at the bottom, and they need to be put in watertight containers, so that they wouldn't leak when you water them! I always have bunch of old food containers on hand for this purpose:

Now with this setup, it's very convenient to bottom-water them. This means you never water the top of the soil; instead, you pour water in the watertight container, and all of the soil in the containers with holes will soak up exactly as much water as they need. This takes care of the risk of overwatering, your plants will not drown in this way, and also their roots will be encouraged to grow deep down to the source of the water.

And now they’re on their makeshift table! All the attention these need now is to get some water every few days, and to be in the brightest place possible.

[ninapi]

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Save me (Ushijima Version)

Premise: Ushijima struggles to understand the concept of love and what is expected of him in said equation, but he finds himself in the predicament of wanting nothing more than to be with the woman he loves even if it gets in the way of his established lifestyle.

Word Count: 4981

Chapter 6: Happy Ending

Coexistence is an awkward thing, specially when two lonely souls get a taste of it at the same time.

You’ve been living in the dorms for three years in a row and yes, you visited your parents a few times during longer holidays, but you were now used to being alone all the time. As for Ushijima, he lived with his mother, but both of them were rarely home, so interactions were minimal.

When his manager heard he asked for your hand in marriage he worked hard to get you a perfect fit and when I say hard, I mean he didn’t sleep for three days until he found a fitting property for you to start your journey together.

It wasn’t what Ushijima had in mind, he lived all his life in a small two-bedroom apartment with his mother and it wasn’t terrible, but when he knew he wanted to marry you, he thought of giving you the best life someone can ever offer to a life partner, not something that came out of his dull memories.

The apartment was even smaller than his previous one, it only had one bedroom and it didn’t even have a yard, just a balcony.

He was dissatisfied and even wondered how his manager ever thought this was ideal for you two. He was regretting bringing you along to sign the contract.

“(Y/N) don’t you love this place? It has so many windows and the view is gorgeous! That’s what sold it for me, also your room has a walking closet and a really big bath, very difficult to find if you ask me, he’s a big guy after all, having him fit in a Japanese average bath is a task. Since you like plants I thought this balcony would be perfect for you, it stretches all the way to your room and the kitchen! You gotta see the kitchen, it even has an oven installed on the wall!” after hearing his manager’s rant he felt a bit bad for hating it this much, he never thought of the things he was mentioning, it was true, for you a nice kitchen and space for plants would be important assets, he was also pretty big, now that he thinks about it he didn’t even know baths came in different sizes, maybe this wasn’t as bad, at least it was a start.

“I love it! It’s so spacious! Living in a dorm for so long really makes you appreciate some extra space. Thank you for your help, it’s lovely.” you gave his manager a soft squeeze and he took the signed papers over to finalize the deal, giving you both some alone time to look at your new home in detail.

“Toshi what’s wrong? Do you not like the place?” you walked over to your man, holding onto his arm as you waited for his reply. “I guess it does make sense for us, it’s also in a very convenient location and in my estimated budget.” he looked around again trying to convince himself some more, “But?”

“But it’s not what I wanted for you, for my family. I envisioned a large house with a big yard and more rooms. We can’t have babies in a place like this.” his statement made you blush, he was really thinking ahead which was endearing but also a bit embarrassing, you haven’t even had the baby talk yet, it’s the first time you hear him say he wanted to have kids. “Hmmmm…we can definitely have babies here though, cozy places usually bring families together. But the contract is just for two years, Toshi. If you don’t feel comfortable enough by then or we need a larger place, we can just look for another one. I think this is a good start, it has all we need even a bath that fits… you.” Only you could make grabby hands look so oddly suggestive, but he got what you were trying to say, making him laugh a bit.

“As long as you like it, it’s fine with me.”

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Your parents weren’t really surprised when Ushijima formally asked for permission to marry you, they had already heard the details from you the same night when you came back from your graduation ceremony. They were happy with the news, your dad in particular, the terrified look in your eyes when he took you back from Kageyama’s arms back in the day still hunts his nightmares. He always feared experiencing such a hard relationship being that young would scar you forever and would make you drift away from finding true love. Even if this meant ‘losing’ their only child to adulthood this fast, he was happy for you.

Ushijima came to your house sporting a very expensive looking blazer, a big basket of fruit in one hand and a flower bouquet for your mom in the other.

He took this so seriously it was almost comical, but they could feel in each of his actions how important this was for him. He even printed a copy of his monthly income and his bank statement for your parents to feel at ease knowing he could support you just fine on his own and they had nothing to worry about. It was more than you expected, and your mom was still dizzy after reading all the paperwork he brought to support his request.

Once he was completely sure that both of your parents accepted him as a new member of the family, you all sat down to eat your mom’s hearty dinner, not before setting all his bank statements on fire. Your parents wanted him to understand they didn’t care about money and that as long as he loved you, it was all it mattered for them and if you were ever in need of help, they would always be there to do so.

It made him feel supported and welcomed but also sad at the same time, he wished he could say the same about his parents, but the sad reality was that none of them cared. He took you to meet his mother and she wasn’t thrilled. After bringing you some tea she left with her friends, making Ushijima feel many things, embarrassment being the predominant emotion. But you, you cried. Not because she didn’t care for you, but because you could clearly see how his life has been all this time, and it broke your heart. After reassuring him that you were fine with not having a mother in-law, he researched for days making sure he would cause a good impression when asking for your hand, having money and a good income being seemingly important to everyone online.

He felt like he was part of a family for the first time since he has memories of his own self, and that felt good.

Your dad dragged him to the living room to chat, he was impressed with the fact that he would be taking part in the World Cup and was already accepted as a representative for the next olympics even when they were far away from now, he’s been representing the country in the sport for long, and he wanted to let him know how proud of his new son he was. Your mom brought some tea and cookies over to the table and you nestled yourself on his side, your mother doing the same on your dad’s side. It was such a heartwarming scene to him, he always wanted a family like this and he was able to get it through you, he was grateful.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

The wedding wasn’t big and as fast as it came it went, all of your school friends came over for it, even Tendo came, there was no way he would miss the event of a lifetime, it felt more like a school reunion than a wedding, but you were both grateful for it, it just made things easier, more natural.

At first, living together was as awkward as it could be. He was very well mannered and organized, you were as well but in different aspects. He would go around the house picking up all your water bottles to wash them and put them away, when all you wanted was to have them there so you could get enough hydration during the day, very little miscommunication issues of this sort, nothing to worry about that was fine. But he, well let’s just say he wasn’t good at knocking so he would constantly get in the restroom while you were peeing, also giving him the biggest shock of his life when he got in and saw you butt naked getting into the shower.

It took you a couple of weeks to figure out a routine that worked for both of you and for him to understand you were human too and peeing was a normal thing, but after a few trial and error weeks everything got better, and you were both satisfied with how it all turned out.

You visited him often for lunch time, this letting you to meet his personal trainer one day and you immediately clicked. He gave you a nutrition guide for star athletes that you studied heavily, wanting to support your husband to the best of your abilities, this awakening a new passion.

You always did enjoy cooking, especially if it was for your man, so it made perfect sense you decided to make it your full-time job. That way you could be useful for not only your husband but also his teammates, becoming a fully trained and certified sports dietitian in just a few years. Ushijima was happy with your choice, anything that would keep you close was a win for him.

On a side note, having your sleepy self rubbing on him every morning awoken something within him that he didn’t know it existed, even if you always had your suspicions with the way he kissed you, rough and heated. Making him once again think of that big house he wished to get, his instincts were telling him you would need it soon.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Time Skip~

His second child would be coming to this world at the very same time the Olympics would be held, making your rather peaceful home, a mess.

“I won’t go.” he was sitting on the floor in front of the door, crossing his arms over his chest and looking like an angry child. You’ve been having pain in your lower abdomen all morning and he just didn’t feel comfortable leaving you alone, even if that could put at risk his entire future.

You could hear Kageyama banging on the other side of said door, extremely annoyed by the situation. “(Y/N) you better get your husband’s ass in the van within five minutes, or I swear I will get this door down.” this was definitely not helping, getting you even more agitated,  “Baby c’mon, get up, don’t make a pregnant lady drag you outside, we are in a fifteenth floor.”

“I said I won’t go.”

Kageyama was losing his cool, Hinata and Hoshiumi were now racing over to the apartment while bickering, causing you to sigh dramatically.

“Toshi, you need to go. You’re their captain, the country needs you, my love.” you managed to open the door squishing your belly on your husbands face, a circus worth of people outside your home already.

“I can’t go. What if my daughter decides she wants to come out today? I can’t possibly leave you here alone, you are due in just a couple of days, she could be here any minute now.” you looked out at the bunch of familiar faces pleading for help, they were all adults now but to you they were still a bunch of toddlers, pretty much useless in a situation like this. Kuroo, the only adult around and your co-worker came to save the day. “Ushijima just go. I’ll stay here with her, you don’t need me there to win, do you? I’ll call Iwaizumi if anything happens, and he will let you know. Now go.” your puppy eyes and Kageyama’s thirst for blood made him get up from the floor.

“Will you be fine with that? I don’t trust him.” he was side-eyeing Kuroo who had a smug satisfied grin on his face. At least he got him to move. “I do trust him, love. Go. She’ll wait for her daddy to come home.” as if on cue, a playful foot came out of your belly, making Ushijima’s heart feel even heavier, he really didn’t want to leave you right now.

“(Y/N) we need to leave now.” Kageyama was now pulling all the stray onlookers out of the apartment, heading for the elevator.

Getting on your tippy toes you gave your husband a soft peck on the lips before detaching yourself from him and walking over to Kuroo. “I have the hospital number saved in my phone, looked it up just now, also I know she has her bag packed and ready to go, I have my car parked outside too. Just go man, I know what to do.”

Instead of replying he looked around the house for his little devil. “Runa, where’s your mom’s baby bag?” little feet padding around were heard coming from your room, followed by a rolling sound. “Here, daddy!”

“My sweet angel, I have to go for a couple days. This strange man behind me is supposed to take your mom to the hospital if your sister comes early. What do you have to do if that happens?”

Straightening herself in a military-like position and showing a scowl on her face, she answers, “I press the number 1 in mommy’s phone hard, grab my pink backpack, and wait.” bringing a smile to his face, he caresses his baby girl’s little face, “Good girl, instead of waiting, now you will follow the spiky haired man to his car and wait for daddy in the hospital, ok?” giving her dad a big hug, she nods. “Will you come fast, daddy? I’m scared.”

Dropping his sports bag to the ground, he deflates, “That’s it. I’m not going. You have other great players; you don’t need me.” he was about to take his jacket off when you stopped him for good, “Ushijima Wakatoshi, get in that van right now. I can take care of both of our daughters. If I need to go to the hospital Tetsu will take me there and your daughter won’t come out of me until you get to the hospital, trust me, I know my daughters, they’re just like you, stubborn.”

He looked like a wounded puppy, but he knew you were only thinking of your family’s best interests as usual, he trusted you and his unborn child, she’s always been good to you, wouldn’t give you a hard time when he wasn’t around. He needed to get this over with fast so he could come back in time.

“So, two games today and if we win the second one, then we have one or two more tomorrow, right?” he was talking to Kuroo, yet his eyes were going in between his three-year-old and your ridiculously large belly. “Yup, let’s not say ‘if’ kay? Total of four games, you should be back by tomorrow evening. I’ll stay here and we can order something delicious for dinner and watch princess movies all night.” that made his toddler jump around excitedly, suddenly forgetting her daddy wouldn’t be around for a while.

Nodding in agreement, he bent down a bit to kiss your lips tenderly, then crouched down to kiss your belly and pulled his tiny human along for a forehead kiss before quietly walking out of the house. He really didn’t want to go, but his family was growing, he couldn’t afford to mess this up right now especially with the renewal of his contract coming right up and foreign scouts coming to the matches.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

As you predicted, contractions did start the following morning, but you’ve already done this once, you knew what to do and you kept on with your daily routine for as long as you could still walk around the house, having to take breaks often to breathe through the pain. Her due date was the very next day and it seemed like she would come just in time, if not a bit earlier.

Kuroo had your toddler sprawled on his lap, very much asleep while he watched the final match on the TV.

You stopped in front of him holding your rollie luggage and your daughter’s backpack, sending chills down his spine when he took in all the signs. “Oh my god, (Y/N). Are you for real? Is it happening now?” holding onto your belly in pain, you tried your best to give him a comforting smile. “Yeah, don’t worry is not like she will come out of me on your car seat, but I do need to get going, the contractions are coming way too fast now. Is the match almost over?” he nodded, looking for his car keys in panic mode. “Then don’t call Iwaizumi-san just yet, let’s head over to the hospital first, I will text Toshi so he can see it when the game’s over.” Kuroo held your daughter up gently so she wouldn’t wake up, then took your luggage with his free hand and walked behind you, just in case. You had to stop a couple of times before you could actually reach his car, running out of time you were cutting in close, and you started to fear your husband wouldn’t make it. Thankfully, Kuroo already had your daughter’s car seat in place, getting it ready when he saw you pacing around the house in a cold sweat.

The rest of it was pretty much a blur, your water broke in his car and Kuroo lost two of his lives right there. The entire process was going so much faster this time around, even you were panicking.

Once you got checked-in in your hospital room, Kuroo and your daughter were allowed in with you, the nurses thinking he was your husband, thankfully since you really didn’t want to be alone at that moment. The baby was almost out, your body forcing you to start pushing even without your consent. “TETSU!” he jumped out of the sofa immediately, going over to your side, “Do you need me to hold your hand? Give you some water? How do I help you with the pushing? Should I press somewhere? Fuck, why is Ushijima taking this long??” his panicked outburst made you smile, you were glad the one staying behind was him and not someone else from the team, otherwise you would have probably chewed on an ear or two by now.

“Can you call him?” you could barely talk without screaming, trying to steady your breath, and he complied, dialing your husband with shaky hands.

“Kuroo what is it? I’m on my way but there’s traffic.” he put it on speaker since he couldn’t find a way to comfortably get to your ear without seeing inside of you, he was definitely not mentally prepared for that and wanted to keep his head where it currently was. “Toshi, your daughter isn’t listening, I don’t think I can hold her in any longer I feel her already coming out.” Kuroo was about to pass out but still trying to keep your other daughter from waking up, never leaving your side. The nurses encouraging you to push and very much ready to bring a baby to this world.

“It’s ok, my love. Let her out, I’ll be there soon, just got out of the car. If I run, I should be there in under ten minutes.” getting permission from her daddy, your daughter continued her way out with full force, your husband could hear the pain you were in through his phone, making him run faster along the sidewalk.

“Tetsu, can you please wait outside with Runa? I don’t want to scare her, it’s just going to get louder by the second.” he leaned over to kiss your head, squeezing your hand. “You can do this, (Y/N). Just call me if you need me back in, I’ll let your husband know where you are.”

Nine minutes and twenty-two seconds later, Ushijima was panting in front of Kuroo, who still managed to keep your toddler asleep. “Is she here now?”

“Not sure, the doctor is in now, but she told me to bring Runa out.” he could see how nervous Kuroo was, this was seriously getting to him, it was like if his own daughter was on the line. Ushijima was truly grateful for his assistance, otherwise he would end up hating himself if something bad happened to you or his child while he was out working. “Thank you, I’ll go in now. Can you stay with Runa just a while longer? I’ll come for her as soon as the baby is out.” giving him a thumbs up and a smile, Kuroo returned to the story he was attempting to read to the sleepy child in his arms, a heavy weight now lifted from his shoulders.

As soon as Ushijima entered the room, he was greeted with loud cries, the doctor was holding his naked newborn with glee, seemingly happy with the results. Before even being able to see his daughters face, he jogged over to you, finding you in tears, he did make it on time. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be here to support you, my love.” with a kiss to your head, you could feel his sorrow mixed with excitement running through his veins. “It’s ok, you made it in time look who’s coming to meet us.”

The nurse holding your baby gently placed her on your chest, tears were flowing down your face from witnessing once more the miracle of life. Your husband leaned in closer to look at her face, she was very different from her big sister, her eyes were smaller and her hair was darker, she looked more like him this time. “Thank you for coming safely to this world, Rena.” a stray tear was now on his left cheek, and you kissed it dry, life had been so good to you, it was almost overwhelming.

The other nurse, who at first thought Kuroo was your husband, went out to call him in so he could see the baby before they had to take her away. He didn’t know why he was being called to such an intimate moment, but he complied, bringing your first born along.

You were still holding the baby and Kuroo’s face lit up like a firefly field in seconds, he’s never seen a newborn up close, it was truly amusing knowing she was inside of you just a few minutes ago. “Hi, I’m uncle Tetsu. You owe me some pizza, lil miss. I lost two lives bringing your mommy here on time.” the baby opened her eyes slightly at the sound of his voice, melting his heart into a pile of goo. “You have my gratitude; I will never forget this.” Nodding, he handed Ushijima his other daughter, getting ready to leave. “(Y/N) do you need anything else? If not, then I should probably get going, something tells me my desk is overflowing with papers after missing these two key days of work.” sighing, he gathered his things from the sofa, “You can go, Tetsu. Thanks for everything you sure are the best. But don’t tell Tobio I said that, or we will all be in troubles.” after a good laugh and some warm hugs, your daughter was taken from you, and you could finally have some rest.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Living in a one-bedroom apartment with a three-year-old and a newborn was giving Ushijima headaches. He loves his daughters with all his heart, but they really needed more space, he found a pack of diapers in the fridge just now and he didn’t know what to do with his own life.

“What’s wrong, baby? You look stressed. Is it because we aren’t getting much sleep? I can take care of Rena at night; you need to rest.” shaking his head, he sat besides you on the bed, moving dolls and pillows around in order to fit. “We need a bigger house, (Y/N). We can’t continue to live in this mess, I can’t even find my eldest daughter.” quiet giggles coming from the closet indicated she was at least still alive, but this was seriously not ideal. “Toshi, you are supposed to be choosing where you wanna play for the next what four years? In two weeks. I’m pretty sure we can wait a bit longer, you said they were all international scouts. I don’t want to get a new house here if we need to move countries in a month.”

He's been thinking about that, moving countries with a newborn was even less ideal than his current situation, did he really want to put you through all that? “I could always stay with the Adlers, we don’t need to go anywhere. Rena is still too fragile to move around, I’m sure I’ll get international offers again one day.”

You didn’t like his tone, Tobio had already signed with an Italian team, you were sure your husband would also be called over to some place in Europe, you’ve been even looking forward to it. “We are not giving up on Europe just because we just had a baby, Toshi. This was your dream; we are following it till the end.”

“You’re right. That was my dream. Now, my priority is to make sure my family is doing good and have everything that needs. I’m not sure if traveling with a newborn is such a good idea.” it would be complicated but not impossible. “She wouldn’t be a newborn; we wouldn’t need to go there for another month. If we do things right, we can even get that big house you want there, the girls will be just fine.” he was still unsure but if that’s what you wanted then he would do his part.

Offers did come flying to his face, he had to sit down with Kuroo to go through them, he relied on him so much more lately and he had offered to help him decide which offer was better for his family. Poland came on harder than the rest, they even threw in a fully equipped home for his family in the offer, he wouldn’t have to think about rent or buying a house so he could just continue saving money for later while you stayed home with his girls.

Kuroo was certain this was the best offer, but teasing someone as dense as Ushijima was always fun. “But know I’m keeping (Y/N) here. You take your kids to Poland, she isn’t missing more work.” he knew he was probably joking but it felt like a knife to the heart to him thinking of being apart from you for such a long time. “She’s staying home with the girls, might not work ever again.” the alpha male in him was shining brightly, making Kuroo’s insides turn but managing to mask it with a boisterous laugh. “I’m joking, man. I wouldn’t even let her work yet if she stayed. I saw her pushing that child out ok, seemed tough, she needs sleep.” Agreeing with this Ushijima relaxed back onto his chair, looking at the rest of the offers.

Italy also wanted him, and he knew having your best friend around would make you even happier, but he could always fly over, it’s fairly close, that house was the deal maker, if he ever ends up drinking formula instead of coffee again he’s strangling someone. “Let’s go with Poland then.”

“Yeah, money wise is the best option and if you don’t need to pay for rent that just makes things easier for (Y/N), she can stay home at least for a few years with the girls. It’s a four-year contract though, Runa would have to go to school there, is that fine with you?” that would be tough on his daughter but she’s as smart as you, learning a new language could even be considered fun for her. “It's ok. Afterwards we would probably come back to Japan. I don’t want to keep my wife away from the things she loves for long just because I wanted to play for a European team.”

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Poland was lovely, your daughters didn’t really notice much of a change except for the fact that they had a very unpleasant first flight.

Tobio would fly over every off season to chill with you and still train with your husband, having been his setter for so long, he still craved the comfort of his previous team, thankfully they now get along much better than before. He also got attached to baby Rena quite fast, causing daddy to get jealous of how happy she seemed when he was around, but he figured this Kageyama jealousy thing would just live with him for the rest of his days.

Four years go by quickly, the future was unknown for all of you once more. Both, Tobio and your husband decided they wanted to go back to Japan once their contracts ended. Ushijima was now in the last curve of his career, and he thought settling down was probably a good idea. His savings were enough to buy a decent house, while your savings were enough to send your first born to school and live comfortably. You’ve been talking with Kuroo and your job was pretty much guaranteed when you were back so everything seemed to be going fantastically for all of you.

The house he envisioned all those years ago before even marrying you was finally in front of him. It had more rooms than you probably needed, a nice little white fence, enough space for you to have a lovely garden and it was in a prime location, being easy for the both of you go to work and take your children to school. Rena would be going to kindergarten this year and Runa was now a third year in elementary school.

Getting to his dream future took more turns than he expected, originally, he thought after playing in Europe he would retire and live alone miserably in the countryside, daydreaming of his past victories. He never thought he would be traveling around the world with his wife and two daughters, never thought he would be blessed with such an understanding partner that gave her all for him and the entire family. He never thought he’d be buying a house this big and to fill it all in with laughter and toys instantly. Truth is he still wanted a son, so it was a good thing the house had some extra rooms and since he wouldn’t be as busy for a while, it was a good time to let the beast lose once again.

He never thought he would find love and that love would never leave him, that love would just keep on growing and multiplying, that he could ever be this happy.

Until he met you.

○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●

Note: Hope you guys enjoyed Ushi’s happy ending, I swear this man makes me so soft- The true ending route will start next Friday, this Sunday I will be posting the first one of my non-haikyuu one-shot series I told you guys about, but next week the boys will be back with the final route for the ‘Save Me’ series 🙊

Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf @lauraagrace, @san-emi

Previous Chapter Masterlist

[burpworm]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! Get to know your mutuals and followers. (no pressure!)

Coffee & tea making! Every day, I try to make something nice with fresh beans or steamed (plant) milk or a tea I love like earl grey or a very nice light/medium roast. It always improves the start of my day a lot.

Fashion, fashion photography and magazines. Though I don't buy a ton of clothes and tend to skimp out rather than going for big brands, I've been very into the theory, the techniques and ways models and stylists can compose such strong looks, and I've channeled that happiness into doing my own digital fashion/character work that pushed me out of a long break period from art itself.

I've always been a big fan of trying to deep dive and learn and appreciate 'classics', whether it's books, games, film, works of art, I always think I could learn a lot from what they do right, what things they influence and the way they shape our culture. It also helps me feel like I have a more developed understanding of the creative process.

Poetry.. I don't write as often as I want to but I love to read it, think about it a lot, explore what ways I can speak in a way that evokes prose poetry when describing things. Me and a friend lately have been doing in-character roleplay poems, sonnets, terza rima, villanelles, trying to put ourselves into the minds of characters that reflect a magical mythical time with a lot of emotional weight. I also want to try to work on my own free verse.

Indie games!! Or indie media in general These are probably the favorite things I like to seek out for fun. Indie stuff just makes me happy to see what people can make with so little, and it's usually stuff that blows me away that I'd never expect or see in anything outside of the low budget self published circuit. Lately what I've been thinking a lot about is Signalis, Pseudoregalia, Caves of Qud, Dujanah, Lunacid, and FAITH

<3 thanks for asking

[kc5rings]

Hi sorry I'm new here please tell me about Perfumer

For her I think scent kink, domination and aphrodisiacs are the big ones. I also think she privately enjoys applying her skills to the creation of such aphrodisiacs for her personal use or for trusted friends. And has repeatedly denied Closure’s requests to mass produce them for profit lol.

Also I gotta say, I already liked Perfumer a bit before getting this ask, but in reading more about her she has shot up my list of operators. She has a mean/teasing streak I didn’t expect! It’s really fun to see that at play with her more up front nurturing/sisterly behavior. I also learned that there is one operator in particular that brings out that other side to Lens better than anyone.

Lena gave the lead wrapped around her fist a firm tug, not long ago this would have been followed immediately by the sounds of stumbling and a string of accented Victorian expletives, but now it only elicited a huff and a slight adjustment of pace.

Lena allowed herself a bit of a smug grin at the show of progress as she walked through a soon to be freshly plowed field far on the edge of the garden. Cultivation truly was her greatest passion, wether it was an unruly plant trimmed back and potted just so…

Or a spirited and stubborn woman in need of a firm hand.

Reaching the edge of the field Lena turned to face her charge for the evening. Operator Bagpipe, and behind her, a heavy steel plough, steadily gouging into the hard packed earth of a new field with Bagpipes every step.

Lena would forgive anyone not recognizing her like this, only her horns and the vibrant shock of red from her hair identified her as the boisterous vouivre operator, and even that was meticulously braided into a thick rope down her back, instead of flying free in its usual wild mane about her head.

Horns and hair aside, the rest of Bagpipes face was obscured by a thick leather hood, it’s only openings being two breathing holes for the nose and one for her mouth, though a thick muzzle concealed her lower face and left the nose holes her only sensory connection to the outside world. Topping it all off was a harness that wove around even her horns, keeping everything in place.

The rest of her body was no less adorned, torso draped in a sturdy harness, arms folded out of the way behind her back in thick leather restraints and finally boots that rose to the thigh and lacked a heel, all her weight instead supported by real steel horseshoes riveted to the bottom of the boots. The entire ensemble a mix of soft browns and greens as per Lena’s preferences.

Add in the thick cables that connected the head and body harnesses back to the heavy steel plough and Bagpipe made the very picture of well outfitted burdenbeast.

As Bagpipe reached the edge of the field Lena slid a glass vial from a holster on her hip, fingers brushing the handle of a whip coiled there as well, made of matching leather matching Bagpipes tack. She wondered if she’d have cause to use it this evening, Pallas had been gracious enough to instruct her in its use when asked and Lena would be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy the application of those lessons.

For now though, her burdenbeast was behaving wonderfully and that called for the carrot not the stick. As she popped the top on the vial and held it up to waft under Bagpipes nose, watching labored breathing become a deep inhale accompanied by a full body shudder, Lena thought back to the beginning of this arrangement.

It had started as a joke, or if Lena was being more honest, an argument.

“Operator Bagpipe. I am telling you /again/ that new equipment on that scale is /not/ in The Garden’s budget right now, you will have to make due with refitting what we have.”

This was becoming an all too familiar scene, interior of Lena’s greenhouse turned office and lodgings, the perfumer pinching the bridge of her nose and the ever irrepressible Bagpipe across from her making the case for the Convalescence Garden to request funds for a new tractor.

Again.

“Come on Nena, give a girl some rope here. What we’ve got gets the job done but it takes an age and a half, at the very least we could do with replacing the engine.”

Bagpipe leaned on Lena’s desk, putting on a truly impressive display of puppy dog eyes that in the end did little to penetrate Lena’s calm exterior. Given how long they had been seeing each other Lena had built up quiet a tolerance against this particular tactic, and as much as she enjoyed Bagpipes company outside of work, the garden was her pride and joy. She took proving that it was an asset to Rhodes and not a money sink very seriously.

“I’m on my knees here, the state of those things right now I’d get the work done faster pulling the plough myself.”

Whereas the pleading eyes that could shake even Miss Skamandros’ resolve had failed, something about Bagpipes grousing struck a chord in Lena. She leaned forward, her face suddenly inches in front of Bagpipe’s

“Would you now? Can you guarantee that Operator Bagpipe?”

To her credit, Bagpipe didn’t back up, though she did visibly swallow, Lena was so close now and as always, smelt so good…

Bagpipe recognized that shift in Lena’s tone, the one that promised good but strenuous things in her immediate future. Serene and caring as her demeanor usually was, Bagpipe had come to understand that Lena had a very different side to her at times, one that Bagpipe in particular seemed to draw out of her.

“W-well, I mean I might be able to.. but it was really just an expression you know I-“

Lena cut off Bagpipe’s stammering with a finger to her lips, keeping it there for a moment as she spoke, to ensure she had Bagpipes attention.

“Every time you’ve come in to ask for a new tractor you have been unable to provide me with a suitable compromise between your desire to tend the fields faster and my desire to ensure the garden can afford to keep running smoothly… until today.”

Letting her finger drop Lena glanced at her terminal, nodding as she confirmed that she had no appointments for therapy this evening.

“Now, I have no shortage of other tasks to see to today, as do you. But if you would like to pursue this proposal of yours, meet me back here this evening and we will discuss it in detail.”

That day was months passed now, and Bagpipes “proposal” had become a sort of ritual between them. It always played out the same way, if her schedule was free enough and the mood struck, Lena would dab on a few drops of a very specific scent, and if Bagpipe responded, Podenco and the rest would be let go early for the day and the garden would be closed for a “private training session” that evening. It was one of the rare indulgences Lena allowed herself and after all, it was good for the garden.

Everything bagpipe wore was custom made, but the hood in particular had been crafted to Lena’s exact specifications, with some help from Pallas, the clever lacing that allowed it to accommodate horns had been her doing.

More importantly though, was the padding over the ears and eyes inside. Lena wanted Bagpipes attention focused solely on the lead attached to her harness, and her sense of smell.

Muffled by layers of leather, loan moans began to reach Lena’s ears as the cocktail of heady scents and aphrodisiacs did its work, amplified manyfold by lack of any other sensory input. Keeping the vial steady with one hand, Lena leaned into Bagpipe as her free hand began to wander lower.

Bagpipes body was as sturdy as her much vaunted stamina would lead you to expect, and even compromised as she was Lena’s weight against her proved no challenge at all. For Lena, this made it all the more satisfying when those strong legs nearly buckled as her fingers pressed into Bagpipe, the ease with which she slid inside proof of how potent her latest batch was.

Working into a steady rhythm it took almost no time at all for Bagpipes low moans to become muffled pleas and desperate gasps, each breath in fueling the fire that Lena stoked expertly stoked with nimble fingers. She knew every way Bagpipe loved to be touched and was merciless in applying said knowledge.

Leather creaked as finally, Bagpipes body went ridged, muscles clenched as she desperately fought to stay standing as her climax crashed over her, Lena’s touch drawing it out over long aftershocks that left Bagpipe breathless and shaking.

But. She was still standing.

Thumbing the top of the vial shut Lena slid it back into its holster before reaching up to unbuckle one side of Bagpipes muzzle. It took no encouraging as slick fingers rose to Bagpipes now free lips, dutifully leaning forward to take them in her mouth and clean them the second her own familiar scent hit her nose, just as Lena had trained her.

Only once they were thoroughly clean did Bagpipe straighten back up, her breathing slowly normalizing even as her mouth still hung slightly open, making it very simple for Lena to reach up and press the tip of a water bottle passed Bagpipes lips, controlling the angle to ensure she drank slowly and steadily.

While Bagpipe drank her fill, Lena indulged herself, leaning in to the crook of Bagpipes neck and taking a deep breath, savoring and analyzing the notes of salt, freshly turned earth, leather and Bagpipes own unique scent, before pressing the cool glass of an empty vial against her neck to collect and store a sample that would form the base of the very scent Lena had trained Bagpipe to respond to. The same one that always signaled the beginning of one of their nights together like this.

“Well done, my fair and strong Akamatos.”

Lena took up the lead and, reasoning that her burdenbeast had been given ample time to collect herself, began tugging her along once more. Bagpipe given no choice, and having no inclination, but to dutifully follow, footsteps heavy but still in the perfect stride she had been trained in. Lena, for her part, felt lighter than she had in weeks.

“Only 3 fields left to go.”

[balancedtranslocationdiaries]

Getting through IVF failure

Date night: After the anxiety and cortisol of the two-week wait dwindles, I usually fall into a depression coma. I think it's really important to prioritise your relationship with each other during this time and make a deliberate effort to go on a date day/night. Leaving the house and being affectionate may feel like the LAST thing you want to do, but trust me, it helps. We went out to an Italian restaurant we had wanted to try for a while and purposely went to the cinema to see a movie afterwards instead of retreating back to the couch and rotating Netflix catalogue.

Get off social media: social media is the best and worst remedy for infertility related anxiety and depression. The night we went to the movies for date night I quickly glanced at Instagram prior to the movie starting and was caught off guard by a friends pregnancy announcement of her SECOND baby in 12 MONTHS! I sat there fuming. "That's it! I'm going offline.. better yet.. I'm going off grid! NO PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENTS IF I'M LIVING IN A CAVE?!

Once I had grounded myself again (thanks to Chris Hemsworth and chocolate) I remembered the amazing support networks I've gained through social media, and the way it has countered so much of the loneliness I've felt lately. Instead of quitting altogether, I made the decision to limit myself moving forward. For me this meant avoiding my IVF Instagram page for a few weeks, muting all accounts with babies and pregnancy related content and limiting social media use altogether. I turned to 'healthier' alternatives such as phone free netflix binges, journaling, reading, walking with a podcast on etc.

Puzzles: when you only feel capable of dwelling on what could have been, doing a puzzle gives your mind something else to focus on. With each puzzle piece there is a sense of accomplishment and while IVF doesn't promise any end goal for your effort, puzzles do. My routine in the early days of grief involved working on a puzzle while watching Stranger things. No time for ruminating when your hands and mind are busy.

Catch up with friends who don't have kids and aren't on that wavelength: when you're early 30s and onwards it can be hard to find friends who aren't pregnant, aren't parents or aren't trying to conceive. I still have a few friends who fit this category so I make an effort to prioritise these friendships during IVF slumps. When I went for a walk with one of my best friends who is far from trying to have children, it was such a nice circuit breaker. We discussed work stress, upcoming holidays, dog training, her winery tour adventures .. literally everything but kids! We did briefly discuss the failed transfer (a girl needs to vent) but it wasn't the focus of the catch up. If you don't have friends that fit this category, I'd suggest establishing boundaries and communicating what you need prior to catching up. Maybe this is "Just a heads up I'm struggling at the moment and would like to avoid talking about IVF today" Or "I'm going to talk about the transfer for 5 minutes but stop me if I bring it up again because I know it's not useful for me to revisit it."

Boundaries: family members and friends mean well when they ask how you're feeling but personally, I seldom find this helpful. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the loss and despair being acknowledged, but having to repeatedly revisit the grief and discuss it can keep me feeling stuck. I usually say something along the lines of "thanks for checking in but talking about something else would be most helpful for me right now."

Home improvement: To get me through the most recent failure I decided to do something nice for myself (budget permitting of course!). I bought a new plant after the transfer, a reading chair and a some bits and pieces from KMART to make a reading space which has brought me so much joy. It doesn't have to be a project as big as this to bring a sense of accomplishment. It could be organising a cupboard under your sink or buying some new bathroom towels. They say change is as good as a holiday and I think they're on to something.

Enjoy forbidden pregnancy things and child free luxuries: take yourself to a bougee sushi restaurant, order yourself a cocktail and a charcuterie board, buy a morning coffee and maybe an afternoon coffee as well! I try and romanticize and feel grateful for the life I have right now. A life that is, in many ways, selfish and indulgent (hello reading for 2 hours at a time or getting 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep). Would I prefer to be a mother? One thousand times yes.

Do I choose to nurture and hold hope for the person in the waiting? Absolutely.

I hope this helps x

[icharchivist]

gosh, mentioning your friend who got bowled over by act 2 autumn must’ve been foreshadowing, because I, who foolishly was like, oh I don’t think I’ll relate to azami that much he’s very different from me but it’ll be fun to see autumn, cried twice while going thru the back half of this story. jeez. I’ll may have to be a bit less chronological than usual for the sake of keeping all of that stuff later.

zombie run night was rly great! more like zombie fun night amirite. I’m sorry I make bad jokes. banri getting azami to be a zombie as well was so nice like. again he’s being a good leader.

tenma being scared of zombies makes sense obviously. I’m with him. not zombies but when I was staying with a relative a while back I found a lizard the length of my hand in the bathroom and then refused to use that bathroom for the rest of my stay.

I really liked the eyeball necklace detail—it made the event feel real and also considerate? the moment yuki just went … at tenma I Knew he had planted the necklace on him tho. he’s so funny for that. seeing that and being like yeah tenma you’re so right. you don’t need to participate. cant believe mankai didn’t recognize banri when he caught them. azami must have some stellar makeup skills

azami going after sakyo and haunting him abt his budget lifestyle was sooo funny. like I was bracing for something slightly charged to happen but it was just funny. and he had a good time!! I’m glad. I liked that banri was like. still encouraging to azami even tho his acting motives aren’t the purest lol. I mean to be fair he has no room to talk there but it’s also just nice to like. meet him where he’s at. like we see azami doesn’t really get The Feeling until closing night but. things take time.

azami and omis whole thing was. so good. like the way he won’t even like accept a bandaid is so. azami… I loved the way they resolved it? first seeing omi juza and tsuzuru talking in uni was cool. but then kumon approaching azami was like. so nice. again the way that they like talk and kumon’s like I miss summer! and u can Hear the smile in azamis voice when he’s like come on summer literally just ended!

but him being awkward around omi bc he’s not sure what a mother should be like… gosh. like the way he describes the whole thing as like. strange and confusing I’m going to vote the wall like. like yeah actually that’s exactly how it feels when someone is kind to you in a way you haven’t yet experienced it makes you want to throw it off immediately bc it’s like whoa whoa hold on. I’m not allowed this kind of thing. anyways just. no wonder he likes kumon so much that guy is like, effusive in his praise and azami probably likes having ppl around who are Nice like that. loved omis portrait. it was so good. and it like. absolutely sucks that he had to grow up that quick. very nice to see nachi again, though. but when kid-omi was like: one day in the future. I’ll take a break for myself :) omi. omi I’m shaking you. have you ever really done that. well ig now that he’s living in mankai he’s letting his family take care of housework and stuff? but like, still.

minor note but when they’re doing a street act it was rly cool to see juza just like seamlessly and confidently advertise the play. he’s come so far…

*cracks knuckles* alright all of that was warmup now it’s time for the BIG STUFF. azami almost got hit by a car!!!! the cg there was like. So Good. like the way sakyo is absolutely Frazzled… yeah. like god I keep thinking abt that cg. its sooo. wow!! i dont think ive seen sakyo look so distressed!!! hes not wearing glasses bc he was so shocked that he ended up breaking his glasses in the rush to get there!! its like. azami look... u have a dad that wishes for your every happiness... and azami is just Sitting There mostly unharmed and looking a little confused like huh… why’s sakyo looking so out of sorts… it’s wonderful. and the way sakyo is like even if it was just a scrape I need to find who did this and hurt them. like godddd and the way he’s like “so I don’t even have the right to worry about you anymore?” I am. Going to cry.

what rly got me tho was like the whole jin-gi-oh cards though bc like first off sakyo remembered ALL of them but also!! also just the way u can hear azami kind of mumble stutter like we-well I bet he doesn’t even remember the card stuff (why would he really care about me…) and then sakyo clearly Does. and it’s just like.

it’s so clear that while sakyo is convinced that he barely has the right to talk to azami bc he betrayed him by chasing after his dream… a lot of what azami is worried about is that sakyo doesn’t care about him anymore. like imagine you’re fourteen and you’ve just learned that the guy you secretly think of as your dad, who’s like the only one that’s supported your dreams, is leaving you to pursue his own. without you. and you get into a huge fight with him about it and storm off. and then a week passes and you don’t hear from him. months pass and you don’t hear from him. whenever he’s around doing ginsenkai stuff you just… don’t really talk to him. and you’re fourteen maybe fifteen so you’re too embarrassed to reach out first. besides if he left that easily maybe this whole thing was just a job to him, huh? maybe he never liked you as much as you liked him. whatever. whatever. it’s fine. like the “I bet he’s having so much fun now” line azami says… it’s so clear he believes like. oh sakyo was slumming it with me and left for greener pastures.

and of course sakyo is sitting there like oh I’ve committed the biggest betrayal ever by not supporting his dreams well enough. he probably hates me and doesn’t want to ever see my face again. and like that’s not helping.

and then you run away from your bio dad because you can’t let go of your own dreams and when you don’t have anywhere to go it turns out that you can actually run to the place sakyo went to. and strangest of all sakyo is letting you stay. like the way he just. the pause he has when sakyo says he’s basically his guardian. the feeling of. sakyo is… admitting that? does he… does he WANT to be my dad (I thought he didn’t want to—)

and now you’re here in a hospital and just saw sakyo was super worried about you and also like. maybe treasures you in the way that you thought he did. sakyo says his story of running away is about a pathetic kid but it’s also like. for azami he just learned that the card thing he did with sakyo and liked so much that he still keeps them carefully is actually a parent-child thing sakyo did with his own mom!!! it’s like. oh my god.

azami talking abt his own experience with buying cards and then his dad trashing them, though… I. hm. I am going to leave the section abt azami’s bio dad alone bc I’m tempted to get mean about it and I kind of want to leave that for later.

so, skipping forward to the actual play… it was so cool to see summer come in for support! and I always love seeing how the chapters extend what we see in the actual play. also the voice acting that’s good too. the one thing I noticed was like. “you remember the boy with brown hair you killed three years ago?” who’s going to tell them that taichis hair is as red as ever. so roy’s hair was never brown. it got kinda brown when he became undead? but before I don’t think it was.

cannot believe those asshole delinquents were the ones who almost hit azami. the title “buff high schooler” is just rly funny to me tho. sakoda chasing after azami and then calling everyone was so good of him. smart choice my guy. love how everyone in autumn (minus taichi who seems a little nervous) is like. it’s fighting time. very cool to see all of natsugumi volunteer to be opening act. was confused by the “I always repay my debts” line but I think it’s for banri acting as stand in for kumon? which is nice bc it’s like. tenma is the one saying this so it rly just gives the idea that like. natsugumi is a team yknow. and later when they do the acting it meshes so well with the actual play? bc like they had a specific point where they were like oh let’s adlib and do some comedy that’s undead related to make sure the play isn’t a bummer. and then here’s natsugumi just doing like those sorts of jokes.

anyways back to azamis kidnapping.

muku: won’t it be bad if they see ur faces?

me: …ah. I have. the faintest idea of where this is going [judo bear nozaki flashes to my head]

THE CG WAS. THE BEST POSSIBLE USE OF A CG EVER ITS SO GOOD. I LOST MY SHIT. THE HOLLOW EYES R KINDA TERRIFYING IN A REALLY FUNNY WAY. TAICHI THIS WAS AN AMAZING IDEA. the guitar / bass guitar (? idk instruments) that rolls in during this scene is amazingggg. it’s just the like instrumental break part of respawn which is. I went and listened to that after finishing boyhood collage and the song is like, sooooo good. much love to it. the rly fast vocal parts made me think of the fast parts of worlds end dancehall. which is like also apocalyptic setting so that was cool. also I love worlds end dancehall.

they were so funny during this tho. sakyo going “roooar. give us back our friend, you punkass kids.” and juza forgetting what bears sound like so he just literally goes “beaaarrrr” what are you a Pokémon?

and sakoda running towards azami!!! <3 I grew soooo much affection for sakoda in this story tbh like he takes care of azami so well!

thought it was very interesting that like. when they return, everyone in natsugumi is audibly exhausted minus tenma (he’s probably got great acting stamina) and misumi (I don’t think he says any lines here? but he’s probably just got excellent physical stamina. and he and tenma did start out with the like best acting chops of the troupe) which is a cool detail.

and then azami just carefully opening up that he was terrified. not of being hit but of disappointing them and the play. and then when he says to sakyo… “I’m only saying this once, but when I was a kid, I always thought of you as my dad. And… I still do.” IM GOING TO CRY. idk. like the way that azami just Says That and let’s it hang there and then they do the play.

izumi: wow the fight scenes r intense today! (please don’t tell me it’s bc they were just actually fighting…)

damn izumi what do u want me to tell you then. huh. they stomped in their with their animal heads and azami pirouetted back to mankai? no violence involved?

and sakoda crying at the play!! again I can hear the smile in azamis voice when sakodas like bawling in front of him. when azami was like. shift couldn’t make it…? I paused and was like. azami implied shift had an interest in theater at the end of act 2 summer… could it be… and then when azami was like “the god troupe, huh…” I was like ahhhh fuck. we shall see what goes on there later ig.

also they bring up vkei again when talking abt what they want to do next and izumi shut it down… what do u have against it! honestly eyes emoji at masumi saying he likes it, tho... mazumi expressing an opinion that doesnt align with izumi's personal tastes??? maybe I’m missing something.

but the ENDING!!!!!

citron: "I have reached my limit..." AND THEN GUYS THERE HES LITERALLY THERE!!!!! I’m assuming the <> for their dialogue means they’re speaking in their native tongue anyways im going to obsess over <Citronia.> <I've come to get you.> / <I've been wondering when you'd get here.> I knew guy was coming to get citron so I’m glad to see that’s confirmed… already gave my theories on the specifics so I’m interested to see if I’m anywhere close to the mark there.

okay and Now I can talk abt azamis bio dad. i. uh. I hate him. actually he really grinds my gears in a way I didn’t think was going to happen. so I’m worried that I’m being like somewhat unfair to him bc I’m projecting my own biases onto him. so I’m sorry if u have like good opinions of him. it’s rly so funny tho I knew azami did like makeup and stuff and I was like “oh I have. No Interest in makeup or skincare so I probably won’t relate to it too hard” and then This happened and it’s like I got hit with a bowling ball.

like goddd. the way azami is like yeah I bought some cards with my allowance, and then my dad who’s not sakyo found out and threw them out. “I learned then to never let my dad get his hands on anything I’d bought with my own money” gah… not to overshare but like, I feel azami so much there. growing up I would like. never want to tell my parents I liked Anything bc I knew they’d be like oh you’re so silly and dumb and stupid for wanting any kind of merch or collectibles! it’s such a hassle!! why do u like this stupid thing!! so. ahah. I went to a concert for the first time this year and I remember my parents thinking it was weird but then one day my dad called me and he was like oh I was talking to a colleague abt the concert you’re going too and he says that band you like is like, super cool and popular. so it’s like ah. ig now that an Adult has approved it I’m a cool kid now. the same way my writing was worth shit and was totally useless until a family friend kept gushing about the way I’d helped their daughter. anyways what I’m saying it is azami I get it.

and his dad then trashed his makeup, too… like the way sakyos defense for the handmade cards were that they were like “yakuza” cards so he couldn’t complain like it’s a flimsy defense but the fact that he even had to like, make a Justification about these cards when it’s like. these handmade cards aren’t going to help azami fit in or make friends at all so like they’re not accomplishing what the store bought ones were for. but like you still need to defend against it.

but yeah the way it’s like. wow at a pretty young age azami was like oh okay. so if I like ANYTHING I can’t tell my dad about it or he might ruin it. do I feel that this is perhaps part of why he seems so cautionary abt romance yeah sure.

the first time I actually teared up during this whole thing was actually sakyo in the hospital telling azami not to give up. that he can do it even in defiance of his parents. and it’s so meaningful bc sakyos like his DAD. and he’s telling him he’ll support him… like idk. something so heartwarming abt a parental figure being like, hey, you need to prize yourself to the point that if needs must, you can even rebel against me.

the conversation sakyo and izumi have after that, too… “after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” this line makes me feel. So Complicated. like I won’t deny the fact that I think azamis dad cares for him on…. Some level…. but it’s like homares grandmother. im glad she loved him but it doesn’t erase the ways that she hurt him, yknow?

also sakyo. you live with misumi tenma and masumi. masumi you can maybe argue his dad caring abt him and same with tenma (but. I mean I’m not HAPPY abt arguing that bc they r rly under baseline care.) but anyways are u gonna do that with misumi’s dad. then again probably only summer troupe knows about the situation there… honestly sakyo probably knows nothing abt the tenma situation too. so he’d only know about masumi and masumis dad seemed like fairly reasonable and nice at the end.

sakoda was so cool here tho. first off having the nerve to even try to still lie about the tickets to protect azami. and then when azami got dragged to his bio dad the fact that sakoda just. started yelling at him? amazing. this made me cry again. like yeah sakodas been watching him… what azamis doing isn’t child’s play! he’s right! and sakoda knows all of this bc he’s been caring abt that kid for forever!! to the point that he’ll yell at the yakuza head like this bc he cares that much!!!

and azami is like. god. I rly love the way he was like. so openly resentful. “Since when have you ever been a father to me?! Dont pull that shit on me now!” ouch. so true though.

and the. the way that uh. “Wh-what are you bowing for? This asshole doesn’t deserve—“ you can HEAR the trembling in his voice. he’s holding back tears. sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways.

anyways I hadn’t thought abt this until now but it’s like huh… yeah no wonder azami made something up. he wouldn’t want to talk abt sakyo in front of sakyo bc that would be like admitting he still cared abt him. and he didn’t want to talk abt his parents in front of sakyo bc uh. it would be complicated ofc. like in his boyhood collage he was like oh I don’t even remember why I ran away, but shift was probably frustrated and stuff. but like clearly azamis mom had just recently died at that point. he probably just didn’t want to talk about that.

the reveal that the magic brush he uses on kumon was his mothers makeup brush, though… like the way it was her cheek blush to make herself look less sick. and he does the same thing for kumon years later. it just makes it… so much more affectionate. ”I wanted to use its magic to make someone happy like that again. I wanted to do for someone else what I could no longer do for my mom.” and YOU DID!!!

and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely.

and the way his reasoning is just like. he just thought azami was making up excuses to run away from the family. that uh. that’s not. true… ugh this part is what made me so frustrated. like azami, after his portrait, so very specifically asserts that’s he’s his son and because of that he’ll do anything for him and ginsenkai family. and it’s like. Yeah. I know what it’s like to be so aware of your position as someone’s child and know that even as you hate them you will also do anything for them even if they won’t recognize that. like… he never even asked. azami was so pissed about getting his makeup trashed that he literally ran away and didn’t come back. and you’re still assuming oh it was a little side hobby, if he REALLY cared about it he would’ve, what, psychic mind beamed the force of his feelings to you? if you had paid attention like sakyo or sakoda you would’ve clearly seen how long and how deeply he’s loved it for. even if it had been for a short time how would you know it wouldn’t grow into something else, anyways. like acting.

also his “study your ass off and aim for the top.” line about makeup and then when he gifts him the makeup set later… good on him for personally buying that stuff. but that line left such a sour taste for me bc it’s like. ugh… honestly it just hit a sore spot bc I remember my parents being like. hi child. you can do like, anything you want supposedly but if you want to do like Anything in the humanities field or arts field you’ll have to be the top 1% of it otherwise you’ll die alone. so like if you’re not good enough to do that just quit (I am implying you’re not good enough). and it’s just like. idk. the sort of implications that if azamis not like the best at makeup ever and also that if he hadn’t chosen to do it bc of his mother and it was just something he Liked, then that reason wouldn’t be enough…? that’s just the vibe I get.

also azamis bio dad being like sigh I’ll tell sayuri you’ve become a strong independent man instead of the family head. it just rly irks me like. even now it felt like hey old man. are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child. because that’s what it feels like.

anyways idk. I hope azami has more space later in life to be a bit more resentful bc I think he deserves it, yknow? I think the way the whole thing went down like, Made Sense bc why would that guy like admit he had hurt his son… that’s like. unrealistic. so I don’t think the story was written badly or anything. it just made me like. really sad. azami didn’t end up loudly crying (im not counting the wailing he has to do in the play for his dead dad.) and like that makes sense to me. actually I think it was very Cool Of Him to never lose his composure That Badly. uh and he’s going to do great considering he as a middle schooler is like rolling normally with college students. but I just want him to be like. feel safe even when he’s not excelling, yknow?

I fear I lost the plot or rambled a bit too hard there at the end, so sorry if it’s incoherent!! I rly like azami!! this was a very good story. im also ridiculously excited for winter.

HUH OH. SORRY ABOUT THAT LMAO. a3 relatability strikes again?

let's go into it!

dFKJDFKLFDJ zombie fun night is perfect. Banri is really being a good leader and figuring out how to have Azami engage with what they're going to do it's just. god Banri is good.

HELPP. Tenma scaredycat, but also for the lizard thing, so valid, i would do the same. AND HELP for the necklace. This is so funny. and yeah Azami's makeup skills truly are shining there! DLKFJDKLFJD being so used to a3 dropping emotional bombs that this just ended up being funny makes it even softer. But yeah agreed on the way Banri coaches him and still encourages him even though it's obvious Azami doesn't feel the same way about theater yet. For Banri who went from uninterested to "this is my whole life actually", it must be jarring to look at this past mirror, but even more reasons to take it easy.

God the Omi and Azami scene was so good. (friend was staring into oblivion during this whole scene and then cursed me. I would love to be all awww but i couldn't stop laughing.)

But yeah it was so nice that like, so many of them worked together in trying to help out? like it really shows that they're really all a family and a community now, and they'll try to help with their newest members as well. AND AWW. yeah Summer is happiness itself. always missing them. even Azami cannot resist them.

BUT YEAH Azami's awkwardness aroound Omi is just. man. Exactly as you say, it's just, difficult to approach right. but yeah it does serve to justify why it goes smoothly with Kumon on the other hand. Omimi's portrait… just, absolutely heartbreaking again as always. I wonder if Omi did take a break when he was being a delinquant and therefore is doubling down on being of service because he still feels guilty for this time. or if him joining the theater troupe is his vision of taking a break since it means his family has to handle things on their own. Or maybe like Juza and Taichi he's just being too hard on himself.

JUZA SO GOOD. ALWAYS.

and here's the meat of it! yes that CGI was so good man. You really feel just how important Azami is to Sakyo in that image. Also if i recall correctly, Kumon panicked over the phone so they really all expected it to be bad while it was just, Kumon panicking, which somewhat makes it even funnier to me. Anyway. Sakyo good dad. that's all i'd say. god this scene is so emo. AND YESS SOBS THE CARDS STUFF. IT'S GENUINELY SO EMO. Azami not able to believe Sakyo would care this much while of course Sakyo does, come on and it's just. god this arc. God the whole way you describe Azami's thoughtprocess is bringing me to tears. I feel like this is exactly how he felt it yeah. Sakyo is worrying about how he "betrayed" Azami by leaving while Azami would have been just fine with it if it didn't feel like Sakyo was abandonning him and only thinking of him as a duty, and it's just. godd. and goddd the way you describe the rest i'm just. soso emo. They really have a neat relationship, a hurt neither of them were able to explain to the other and therefore they hurt one another like that, but they genuinely care so much and want to be part of each other's lives and and y'know what Azami maybe Sakyo is the only dad you need.

SUMMER SO COOL YEAH!! And yeah the play is pretty nice, though yeah. I guess with Azami at makeup they tried new hair things but Taichi's hair stayed too red for it all smh! but i guess in a huge theater it might not matter so much.

SAKODA IS SOOOO GOOD, UNSUNG MVP OF THIS EPISODE. yeah for Tenma's "i always repay my debts" it's about how Autumn helped Kumon out, so Summer is going to help Autumn and Azami out as well basically. And yeah Tenma definitely see them as a team, he's Natsugumi's leader and therefore he speaks for and takes debts for all of Natsugumi. What a lad. But Natsugumi did such a good job and i love how hard they helped on this one. truly MVPs.

Also yes i love how all of Autumn was ready to fight except Taichi who was nervous, but i love even more that it's Taichi who comes up with the plan on how to infiltrate the base. Really reminding us that he was with the "Bad Boys" because of spy related crimes by how he can come up with plans to infiltrate stuff, but also i love this so much. It's kinda where i started to have my headcanon of "Taichi is scaryingly smart when it comes to illegal stuff". Like the idea of Taichi messing up say, simple math, but coming up with an infiltration plan that would even have Chikage pause is one of my favorit headcanons ever, and it all started because of this.

BUT YES THE CG WAS SO GODDAMN PERFECT. IT'S ONE OF MY FAV CG EVER IT'S SO FUNNY. And with the song in the back, it was GLORIOUS. i'm glad you liked Respawn!!!! it's such a neat song! Also i need to share this stage video: https://www.tumblr.com/icharchivist/708632707674079232?source=share

BUT YEAH it was so funny and i lOVE that they were dedicated in like, actually playing their animals like. dguys you didn't HAVE to. you're just so funny. AND JUZA'S "BEAAAR", it's so good. I love them so much.

Sakoda MPV <33333 he really does take care of Azami so well it's really soft.

And yeah Summer's exhaustion is a nice detail. god it makes me wonder for how long they went on, a wonder the public didn't get weirded out by it.

AND SOBS YEAH AZAMI'S SPEECH. YEAH. And also the "maybe it's because i have two assholes dad that i turned into such an asshole" with a bright smile on his face. god he's so good.

And eheheh for Shift, but, yeah. yeah…. AND SAKODA REALLY GOOD. and please just let them having some vkei related play it's all good!! it's worth it!! maybe this time none of you would oppose Juza wearing a dress if the whole thing is about being scared he wouldn't look feminine enough smh!! AND LDKJFKLDFJD MASUMI'S RARE INDIVIDUALISTIC MOMENT.

AND THAT ENDING!!! yeah < > are for foreign languages in general, and in their case it's their native one. But finally. Guy teasing just to build up to it now!!!

Ok so, now, Azami's dad.

"my dad who's not Sakyo" i love that we're carrying it on on "Real Dad Sakyo" and "Not Sakyo Dad", it says everything.

And i'm all good with the oversharing as long as you're comfortable with it, and man. Yeah i feel you on that, my family is pretty much the same. I've also had my family like, throw out or destroy my stuff, important stuff, either without my knowledge or in front of me, so to say i felt Azami really hard would be an understatement. It's a whole level of violation that is just, really hard to swallow and forgive. Impossible even.

Honestly the whole writings over the problematic dads of Mankai, in the whole story, is so conflicting to me in general. I feel like. The issue is that most of the bad parents we meet don't have anything else going for them, the only thing we know about them per se is their function in society, and that they're bad with their kids. They're tools for their kids's backstory more than actual people. And i feel like Azami's dad actually sounds like a real person. A conflicting, messed up person with his own issues, and that ends up hurting Azami as a result. There's a difficulty to reconcile how the dad took good care of Sakyo as a kid for instance, to how he behaved with Azami, and it's really unnerving in general. And as such it puts Sakyo in a position of wanting to defend the man because he owes him so much, and it's difficult to blame him for that, but as a result Azami loses one of his major support.

Honestly my feelings about Azami's dad are complicated. I believe he's the one father of Mankai who can actually realistically work on his issues and improves his relationship with Azami. I believe he cares for Azami on some level more than just material (in opposition to how i'd consider Tenma's, who cared for his carreer more, and Masumi's, who only cared when he needed to fill his divorce's loneliness, and well, Misumi's don't care.). So i end up believing there is a possibility still for this relationship to improve in a realistic way that doesn't feel just like a deus ex machina like the others dads have been. but god, this particular brand of neglect and mistreatment truly also struck a core with me and therefore i can't totally go unbiased about it and ends up just, uncomfortable and unsure. It's so complicated.

Mostly i'd say my different approach is that, even if Tenma, Masumi or Misumi wants to work things out with their dad, i would be completely opposed to it. Purely "why the fuck, no, that's not worth it" at them. But if Azami wants to work it out it's like. "Fine. just stay safe, know you can remove yourself from it whenever you feel like it, and remember to be yourself, and bail out anytime something would go out of hands". yaknow?

But yeah i agree i feel like it really puts Azami in a position of hypervigilence. Everything had to always be a secret, calculated, you only show to your father what you're ready to defend, and it would make some stuff like romance or passions in general, stuff that leaves you emotionally vulnerable, as something that's just too much risk for very little reward. So you just closes in completely.

so Sakyo being there and actually showing him that he can just be himself and he doesn't have to worry more ahead of it is meaningful because yeah, like you say, it gives him a parental figure who is actually willing to let him experiment and be free without having to always be prepared to defend why you want to do something.

“after seeing my boss, I get the feeling there’s no dad out there who doesn’t care about his kids.” i actually really hate this line in a sense, i know Sakyo is mostly just, extrapolating to what he's seeing now, but i hate it on a personal level. I do think Azami's dad cares for Azami, but yeah exactly like you said, like Homare's grandma, his own issues means he hurt Azami in ways that are ways too deep for love to just be enough. Sometimes parents love you and hurt you more than a parent who would merely tolerate you. Because they love you so much they want to make sure you're well fitted to the world and ends up messing you up as a result.

But yeah god, i'm glad we're on the same page, you can't say "all dads care for their kids" when you're living with those kids, and Misumi's in particular. This makes me see so red. I get Sakyo has a personal bias here but giod. but yeah Sakyo probably only knows about Masumi's and yeah, Masumi's dad was reasonable at the end that he might work it out. but also like, didn't Sakyo's dad abandon hm and his mom?! that the whole reason his mom had a hard time in life was because of that? bc i don't remember if Sakyo's absent dad is due to abandon or death. Bc if it's abandon, i feel like Sakyo shouldn't be the one saying all dad cares yaknow? I still think that, the Wastonian reasons of it all, is because Sakyo owes so much to the Boss that he tries to rationalize things in his favor yaknow? But the Doylist reason, i think, is mostly that the one weakness of a3's writing is truly with how they manage to create realistic scenarios of abuses and the way it affects the kids, but then they want to solve it with the parents going "my bad", and the problem is that it's not how coping with abuse works yaknow.

SAKODA IS SOOO COOL HERE YEAH. Like man, the glow up Sakoda got in this arc with how much he would go to hell for this kid and fight the devil himself if he had to. god. unsung mvp.

Azami is totally entitled to throw that at his father's face, go Azami go.

" sakyo bowing FOR azami is so good. like I think this scene hit me so hard bc like both sakoda and sakyo who have the lives they do now mostly in thanks to the ginsenkai, are like… sticking up for azami. who is fifteen and thus hasn’t really Given them anything but like his presence. and they care enough about him to stick up for him anyways. " OGHHH SO TRUE. THIS IS REALLY SO. SO GOOD.

and you're right about Azami's collage being the way it was. It makes sense Azami just didn't want to share this vulnerability, especially with Sakyo, at a point where he still believed Sakyo didn't care for him on top of that. It's really just. man.

SOBS AND YEAH FOR THE MAGIC BRUSH….

"and then his bio dad’s response to all of this. “well, aren’t you all just making me out to be some evil villain. you think there’s a parent out there who doesn’t want to support his child’s dreams?” yes. yes absolutely. " DJFHDL LEGIT. GOD.

But yeah i feel you on everything else you mention about Azami's dad it's just. Acting like Azami was at fault for not making it clear he was serious, while also making the environment too hostile for Azami to even come out and say that. He's responsible for how Azami couldn't trust him and then he blames Azami for not trusting him in a sense. It's really frustrating, and it feels like he's deflecting the blame, while also kinda taking the blame itself. I'm glad he's trying to fix things, and i do think he feels guilty, but it's still so sour.

and i'm so sorry your parents made you feel all those things :( but yeah i totally get what you mean on how it relates to Azami. It's just so unfair to put on him the pressure to be the best of the best.

In a sense i feel it fits a lot of the thematic of Autumn of like… The reasons they have Regrets to start with is because of the expectations people have put on them, whenever it is over their abilities (Banri) or their appearance (Juza) or their age (Sakyo) ect. And i feel like Azami is in this situation where he's about to regret it if he doesn't take his own life in between his hands. He has to break free from those expectations and fights for what he wants. but god. He shouldn't have to fight for it. ig you can't expect Yakuza to do things the easy way, but god he really shouldn't have to fight for it it makes me so sad.

"are you looking more at your dead wife than you’re looking at your actual child" so true unfortunately hhhh.

But yeah i hope Azami gets more ways to process everything later on :/

I do think that, out of all the bad fathers' plotline, like i said, this is the most realistic one in a sense, and i do think it's well written in general. And i do think that when it comes to abused/neglected kids and their parents, there is also just… i know online the consensus is "children should just cut ties with their toxic parents" and i get how it's the easiest way to see it, to free yourself for good for the influence, but it comes with its own type of downsides that are rarely discussed and is also a lot of pressure to put on a kid. Obviously, if it's too toxic it SHOULD be the case, like i said, chara like Misumi in particular are better off moving past it, but i feel like, in Azami's situation, where despite all the hurt and all the pain, Azami still definitely see his father as a human whom he wants to work things out with… It's just really complicated. I have really messy feelings about all of this.

I do hope Azami would manage to be more resentful and end up being able to actually discuss with his dad and challenge him like, no, YOUR behavior was truly fucked up, it's not fair to ask of ME to communicate my feelings better when you never tried to listen, yaknow?

Anyway i do feel like this sort of… complicated messy conflicting feelings of resentment and yet wanting to work it out that is in Azami and his father's storyline, for how fucked up his father is, actually works very well and is very realistic, even if there would be wishes for Azami not to bother at all for it. I feel like it allows Azami the grace of having really mixed feelings about all of this without going to one extreme or the next about how to be with his father, and it's something i really personally connected with, as someone with a very difficult relationship with my family, who thought cutting ties was my best solution at some point, and now as an adult, have to deal with how while i could never ever forgive them, the other extreme isn't satisfying to me, on multiple levels. I don't like his father, but i want Azami to be able to work it out in the way he would consider satisfying, and i think that the story is written in a way that leaves this approach possible and addresses it as such, in a way i think the others bad dads of Mankai get too much of a free pass. but man. messy. And with the patern of bad dads getting off too easily this can come up as much more sour than the conflicting feelings it could have actually worked on if the others dads were treated accordingly imo.

Azami's storyarc genuinely did hit hard for me as well because of that. He's not a chara i particularly relate to outside of this specific plotline but this plotline hits not only very deep, but on mixed feelings that are hard for me to face in fiction, so it's always hard to look at.

On the light hearted side, my friend we talked about was cursing me the whole storyarc bc of how he related to Azami and then Azami's portrait happened and he genuinely just went "okay you know what fuck you" and was so emotionally damaged by the mirror that i could forget for a bit my own pain by letting him suffer a bit. Terrible friend moment.

Anyway!!! it's all good, i'm glad you did ramble, it was really nice to read and well, it's interesting things to think about, even if the conclusion isn't easily clear cut.

I'm really glad you liked Azami and his story!!!

And ehehe Winter soon <3333

And "Conquering Misoshiosa Island!" first!

Take care and always feel free to ramble <333

[stressfulsloth]

hiii for the fic writer ask game: 7, 26, 33, and 50 :)

7. Any worldbuilding you're particularly proud of?

Okay this is silly but I love my Revachol Botanical Gardens. Every single dilapidated seaside city with a local government making half-hearted nods towards reinvestment that I've ever been to has had one- a big sprawling garden with shitty lighting so it gets kind of dangerous at night and crumbling pavements and facilities that haven't been updated since the 50s... intended to be this big hub of life, with live music and plants from all across Elysium growing in the brick raised beds, but the budget was out of whack and now there's a half-built bandstand covered in graffito and lamps that don't turn on and an uneven pavement that you'd never get a wheelchair down. And you look at it and think, you know, what a waste. They could do so much more with it, it could be a real community hub, they put so much money into it that could have been used so much more practically. And when people try to fix it the government shoot down their attempts. Idk I just like the image, I think it's very Revachol. Just like the failed reinvestment project in Martinaise. It's another example of Revachol being held in limbo. I liked it so much I've used it in a few fics now.

27. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or a fic that had only dialogue?

Do the skills count as dialogue?? Because if they do then only dialogue 100%. If not then it gets trickier. I'm not too fond of my dialogue, I think it's one of the weaker parts of my writing, so probably no dialogue.

33. If you write chaptered fics, what's your ideal chapter length to write? Is it different from your ideal chapter length to read?

Ough. My chapters usually end up way longer than I intend them to be, around 8k quite often when I'm aiming for 6ish. That's around ideal for me reading-wise, but I feel like writing-wise they're a bit long for me. I get overwhelmed when I try and edit haha.

50. Answer any question of your choice or talk about anything you want to talk about.

Hmmm. I guess, I'm working on non-fic writing in real life too right now. I just got a few poems accepted for publication in a collection, which is pretty exciting to me because although I've been published a few times it's been a while since I've had the energy to submit anything. It's silly, but I got all giddy about it :)

Thank youuu 💜💜

[audiovisualrecall]

A list of things I want or need to do.....

Schedule driving lessons

Work on unicorn painting

Work on illustrations for steph book

Work on 'cinderell' comic rewrite/update

Laundry today

Dishes+ run dishwasher today

Schedule dentist appt

Schedule vet visit for Edison- he has a cold or allergies or something, also a growth on one of his toes??, and I want to really in-depth discuss a plan for his weight bc ive had no success. Also he's due for annual vaccinations presumably, so. (Wish blue pearl was not so expensive bc they now have Fear Free vet visits and the difference in his behavior when we went there last time compared to other vets weve gone to was just amazing. He was able to wander around the room and it didn't feel like a typical exam room for pets so he wasn't scared and hiding, he allowed the vet and assistant to poke and prod him and manhandled him even if he wasn't thrilled, he didn't cry or hiss or scratch anyone! But for regular vet visits they're really pricey :/)

Work on Eitan and Zahav story/comic

Work on iron man/dragonriders of pern au story

Buy parts for pvc watering system for garden (need to go with dad) and set up

Work on bookcase (with dad)

Window-shop/buy stuff for steph bridal shower (with ma or on my own, but the best store to go to is far enough I'd rather go by car, and it's more fun to go with someone else and discuss ideas and also less likely to impulse buy everything?)

Go to DSW to get new sneakers (with ma, access by car travel only and easier to have a second opinion on shoes. My current pair I have a hole in the top by my big toe...oops)

Work on website: photograph artwork professionally, edit photos, design website layout and complete that. Add artwork to portfolio gallery on the site, add my photo and about me info. Request refund for the dumb add-on I didn't realize was useless. Make the website what I want it to be. May need to learn coding. Need to slim down choices for artwork to include to only the best stuff it makes sense to include, not just things I like.

Design pride plants stickers/pins

Plan for rainbow enamel or just hard enamel autisticat pins. Also, keychains?

Rework/update etsy listings/items available...

Come up with additional ideas for products. Stickers/prints/pins...keychains?

Fulfil current etsy order - soon

Organize my room - try on clothing, go thru piles of stuff, figure out what to do with certain things and if the new bin will help what to put in it, decide what to put back into drawers and which ones for what items, go thru some other stuff like bank statements, organize receipts, etc

Put shelf above window above curtain rod for displaying some stuffed toys (need dad's help)

Hang up new Queer pride flag (need help, also it's way bigger than I expected so may need to fold some of it behind and stitch it to itself to fit on the wall, need help to pin it up on the wall and probably a second step stool at least)

Look for vases for bridal shower for flowers (with ma or solo)

Go thru and organize stuff on breakfast bar

Plan out a budget - figure out how much I tend to spend on different categories of stuff per week or every 2 weeks or monthly, figure out how much I earn in that time period (if it's weekly it's half of my pay bc I'm paid every other, if it's monthly gotta double that amt, also gotta average it out/pick a general usual amount since depending on how much OT I do my pay is more or less lol). Consolidate that info together to decide on a basic budget for each category/ overall spending for the time period.

make list of things I need/want to buy or tend to buy, marked with priority or how often for repeat purchases, compare with budget for what impulse items/wants I can acquire in a given time frame and which to save for the next etc

Get a new bike or get mine fixed...

Spend time outside/go on walk

Water plants

Draw for fun. Draw tony or stevetony or dragons or cats

Read...

Get ice cream at some pt like tomorrow night if I'm off Thursday or on Thursday if I'm off Friday 🥺🥺🥺

Plan days to do activities! Kayaking/beach/farmers market/street fair/museum. With steph?

Plan to do something fun w work friends outside of work

Pride fest: who is going with me?

Renfair when it's time???

Pay for tallis!!! Today preferably! Write check and take it over to shul?? (Or give to ma to take to services this evening or go with her?)

[hungry-tum-stuff]

Introducing: Lumen!

*picrew by julitronix, you can find it here: https://picrew.me/image_maker/395291

Lumen (they/them) is a Wendigo. I’m personally a big fan of the folklore surrounding them and I decided to put my own spin on the human-turned-monster aspect of the mythology in creating Lumen.

In general Lumen is a sweetie pie, they try their hardest to be kind despite being viewed as a sort of demon within their small community, and ostracized by the general public. But they’ve managed to make a living for themself regardless: they love knitting, sewing and embroidering so they’ve converted their little cabin at the edge of their village into a tailor’s shop, and spend most of their days making or mending clothes. Unfortunately they don’t get much business on account of their reputation as the “local horned and hooved tailor,” but when winter rolls around and people need to mend their jackets or buy a new sweater on a budget, Lumen is their go-to guy. They genuinely want to help people, and they feel like they have to in order to make up for some awful things they’ve done, but most people just can’t get past their appearance.

(TW: Mentions of cannibalism up ahead)

Lumen doesn’t exactly blame folks for being scared of them however, because despite acting sweet, they’re still a man-eating monster. Y’see, Wendigos are created when a person cannibalizes someone they love, and from that point on, they are cursed with a hunger that can only be satiated by human flesh. And the more people they eat, the more they become an insatiably hungry inhuman monster. At some point Wendigos completely lose their humanity, and they’re nothing more than a terrifying hunter. Lumen has been able to retain their humanity, though their constant hunger has proven to be a constant challenge. They’ve found ways to stave it off for awhile, and while they’ve gotten increasingly better at managing the hunger, at some point they simply can’t control themselves.

Fun Facts about Lumen…

They don’t remember when they “go feral” and eat somebody. Their mind is simply overcome with hunger and they only come to when they’re full. As a result, they suffer from frequent boughs of migraine-inducing amnesia once they start getting a little too hungry, even if they don’t end up hurting somebody.

While they’re in that feral blacked-out state, they act nothing like their usual self. Lumen is usually talkative, polite, and gentle. But once they start acting like nothing more than a starved, rabid animal, then it’s time to run.

Lumen is able to keep the feral side of the hunger at bay by eating raw meat, even though they don’t really like eating animals either. Eating raw meat doesn’t keep them full in the slightest, but it takes the especially painful edge off the hunger.

Lumen can’t eat plants, since they’re a carnivore any type of fruits or vegetables make them sick. But they can eat sweets, and they especially love meat pies. However, sweets just taste good, even though they don’t take the edge off the hunger at all.

I’ll likely post more about them later (especially about their tummy 👀) but for now I’ll just leave this here as an introduction to them!

Thank you for reading!!!

[kayte-overmoon]

"Mine for the Holidays" Chapter 2!!

Read it on AO3

Or read it below!!

Steve starts the next day as he usually does: a jog bright and early through the neighborhood he lives and works in, Scout trotting ahead of him on a leash.

When he was forced to become financially independent with nothing but a couple retail jobs in high school on his resume, Steve assumed he would be homeless within the month.

That was perhaps a bit of an anxiety-induced overreaction.

He opened a savings account and started budgeting out every single paycheck he brought in, whether he was working at Walmart or the plant nursery, then finally at the humane society he’s called home for a year and a half. It pays a bit better than retail, and he even has benefits. He didn’t realize how big a deal that was until he got a nasty toothache at age 23 and had to pay out of pocket to get his cavities filled.

Life had improved significantly after that.

His new boss, Mrs. Garavaglia, pointed him toward her friend who was renting out her duplex at a much more reasonable price than the other landlords in town. It’s small—one bed, one bath, the living room/dining room only big enough for the couch, TV, and Scout’s crate—but it’s pet-friendly and close to work, so who is he to complain? And the yard is certainly a plus, especially after Scout came into his life.

The neighborhood is great, too. It’s a suburb, but not the HOA-and-block-parties kind of suburb. It’s more of the coffee-shops-and-quinoa suburb. Small businesses dot the brick buildings that have been standing for centuries. People are already milling about—commuters on foot, other runners or dog walkers like Steve, kids on their way to school.

It’s not the place Steve ever pictured himself living when he was younger, but there’s nowhere else he would rather be.

He wraps up his jog when he and Scout are both panting. He approaches a familiar storefront with a painted yellow sign above the door and peers inside.

The shop is small but bright and crowded for so early in the morning. Butter-yellow walls and original wood floors are the backdrop to the wackiest bakery Steve has ever seen. While the options are much of what you would find in any other bakery, they have Lord of the Rings themed names that go way over Steve’s head. He asked the baker to explain them once, but he couldn’t get anywhere beyond “Galadriel’s Glaze” before bursting out laughing.

The baker is at the counter, grinning brightly at an older woman as he hands her a paper bag full of croissants. Steve smiles at the familiar sight and taps on the glass.

The baker’s head shoots up and his dark brown eyes lock on Steve, who gives a little wave and points to Scout, who has obediently taken a seat in the shade while he catches his breath.

The baker looks between Steve and his dog before grinning wider. He finishes his transaction with the old woman, then motions to the other employee in the store to take over the register.

He follows the old woman out the door, sending her on her way with a cheery wave. Then he comes to crouch down in front of Scout, who started shaking with excitement the second the bell above the door rang.

“How’s my favorite little guy this morning?” the baker coos, accepting Scout’s kisses with enthusiasm.

“I’m great, thanks for asking,” Steve says, watching the exchange fondly. “How are you?”

The older man lifts his head, a dark brown curl falling out of his bun onto his forehead. “I was talking to the dog, obviously,” he snaps, then grins again. “Hi, Steve.”

“Hi, Eddie.”

Eddie shakes his head and laughs, then reaches behind him for the bag he’d brought with him. “I brought you breakfast.”

“Me or him?” Steve asks.

“Both.” Eddie rolls his eyes. “Duh.”

For Scout, he brought a little bowl of scraps of ham and chicken from the day before. Once Scout is happily chowing down on that, Eddie stands back up to full height to offer the rest of the bag to Steve, who hands over the dog’s leash to see what’s inside.

It’s a beautiful bagel sandwich, with roasted turkey, egg, spinach, cranberry mayo, and provolone cheese—an odd combination, but Steve’s favorite.

He smiles back at the older man, the cool morning air biting his cheeks and making them red. “Thanks. What do I owe you?”

Eddie waves him off. “Just buy lunch today and we’re even.”

“Deal.”

That’s another part of Steve’s daily routine—lunch with Eddie Munson on their breaks. Sometimes with Scout, sometimes without. Sometimes at the bakery, sometimes in the staff room at the humane society. It doesn’t matter. They aren’t picky.

They’d established their routine after Steve started at the humane society, right after he adopted Scout. He’d been walking Scout when he decided to swing by the bakery he usually stopped at for breakfast and coffee, but he’d accidentally left his wallet at home. Eddie—who at the time had just been the friendly baker who always added extra foam to Steve’s coffee free of charge—told him it was taken care of as long as Steve let him pet his dog and promised to come back for lunch.

He did. And he has every weekday since then.

“I think he’s getting fatter,” Eddie says, making Steve realize he’d been staring at the older man like a creep. He looks at his dog instead, who has pressed himself up against Eddie’s apron after finishing his food, looking up at him with big eyes. Eddie huffs and pets him.

Steve rolls his eyes. “I wonder whose fault that is.”

“Hey, I take care of my best clientele.” He raises his eyebrows at Steve, who realizes he’s being tested.

“Is that…” He runs through the musicals Eddie has told him he absolutely has to watch if he wants to continue being friends. Eddie tests him sometimes on them, dropping snippets of lyrics or references to see if Steve gets them. “Legally Blonde?”

Eddie snaps. “Bingo.”

Steve rolls his eyes and unwraps his sandwich. “You’re the weirdest man I’ve ever met.”

“Pot, kettle.” Eddie ushers him over to one of the tables set up outside the bakery, and he gratefully takes a seat, licking grease from his fingers as stretching out his legs. “You told me last week that you enjoy Master of Disguise. Unironically.”

“Hey! It’s a classic.”

Eddie turns to Scout, who has now rested his head on the older man’s leg, getting slobber all over the black denim. He doesn’t seem to mind in the least. “Your father is a space cadet, Scout.”

Steve makes a sound of protest around his mouthful. “Don’t bring my son into this.”

The baker just rolls his eyes and pets Scout. “What are you getting into today?”

Steve scowls. “I have to clean the cat kennels today.”

“Sounds fun.”

“It’s not. You ever heard the phrase ‘like herding kittens’?”

“Yeah?”

“It’s like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. You move one, then the rest just come sliding off and you all fall overboard.”

Eddie grins. “I’d pay to see that.”

Steve rolls his eyes, pretending to wipe his mouth to hide the pink in his cheeks. “You would. Dick.”

The older man just laughs and takes care of Scout while Steve finishes his breakfast.

“Another banger, sir chef,” he declares, wadding up the wrapper.

“I would hope so.” Eddie holds out his hand to take Steve’s trash. “Just a heads up, I’ll be trying out some new recipes on you the next couple days. This is your last turkey monstrosity for the week.”

“Hey!” Steve protests. “It’s good shit, man.”

Eddie wrinkles his nose and shakes his head at Scout, who doesn’t seem to have an opinion on the matter. “Weird man.”

Steve checks his watch then sighs. “I gotta get going if I wanna wash the sweat off before I go to work.”

When he looks back at Eddie, the older man’s eyes snap from Steve’s arm up to his face. “Right!” he says, too chipper. He stands and offers Scout’s leash back to Steve. “Wouldn’t want… that.” Steve must look at him oddly, because Eddie sighs and shakes his head, laughing at himself. “Sorry. It’s cold as tits out here. I must be losing it.”

“Felt many cold tits in your life, Munson?”

Eddie squints at him for a long moment. “No. Definitely not.”

Steve clears his throat, wrapping Scout’s leash around his hand. “Right. See you at lunch then? I’ll grab some pizza, meet you here?”

Eddie backs away toward the door, shooting finger guns at Steve. “Rubatello’s, right?”

“Where else?” Steve rolls his eyes.

With one last grin, Eddie opens the door and disappears inside.

At lunchtime, Steve has a pizza box in one hand and is attempting to open the door to the bakery with the other when his phone rings.

“Shit!” he hisses as he enters, announcing his arrival not only to Eddie, but also to the handful of patrons. He mouths a ‘sorry’ to them before fishing his phone out of his pocket and holding it up to Eddie, waves him off and goes back to work.

He runs back outside to answer—because he may be rude enough to swear upon entering a place of business, but he’s not rude enough to have a full phone call indoors.

In his haste, he completely forgets to check who’s calling.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Steve.”

The wind leaves his sails at the voice on the other end. “Oh. Nancy, hi.”

“How are you?” she asks tentatively.

He hasn’t heard her voice in three years—the family had been careful to plan around them both after the breakup, so when he was invited to something, she wasn’t, and vice-versa. Luckily, she had the news station as an excuse to be absent. Steve had no such excuse.

“I’m—I’m good. Great even. How—how are you?”

“I’m great too.” She pauses, then goes on cautiously. “Dustin told you?”

He sighs and sinks into one of the chairs outside, the same one he’d occupied that morning. “Yeah, he did. Congrats, by the way! I’m happy for you and Jonathan.”

She sighs as well, her voice coming out much less stilted than before. “Really?”

“Of course, Nance,” he says earnestly. “I know the two of you had something when we were in school before—well. Anyway. Is he good to you?”

“He is.” Her voice softens, and he hates that he recognizes that tone. “He’s great to me. I just—I wanted to make sure you knew before family Christmas. I know it’s been a while, but… you know.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Steve clears his throat. “I appreciate it, but. It’s not like a huge deal, you know? For me, obviously. It’s like, a big thing for you.”

“Oh,” she says, clearly taken aback. “Well, that’s… that’s good!”

Now here’s the thing about Steve Harrington: he was no longer as smooth as he used to be. He used to have tact. He used to hold his tongue.

Some combination of growing up, anticipating the pizza he’s about to eat, the chill in the December air, and hearing his ex’s voice for the first time in years makes him lose his goddamn mind.

Robin’s words from last night come back to him. Make them know you’re happy with your life.

Bring someone to the Christmas dinner.

“Actually,” he finds himself saying. “I’m seeing someone right now. Things are… great. Fantastic, even!”

“That’s amazing, Steve.” And praise God for Nancy Wheeler, because she does sound happy for him and his imaginary lover. “Is she—are they…”

“He,” Steve corrects, like there’s a man standing right in front of him waiting for Steve to ask for his hand in marriage. “He’s great. He’s coming to Christmas dinner with me.”

Shut up, Steve. Shut up, shut up, shut up.

Unaware of Steve’s inner turmoil, Nancy goes on. “I can’t wait to meet him then! He must be something special.”

Steve has half a mind to think that’s a dig, but Nancy Wheeler has never given underhanded compliments, even to people she doesn’t like—and he supposes guys who dump her after six years together fall snugly into that category.

“He is,” Steve says. “He really is.”

Steve is still shell-shocked when he walks back into the bakery a few moments later and melts into one of the chairs.

Eddie wraps up serving the last customer waiting in line, then turns to the curly-haired young man elbow-deep in dough behind the counter. “Gareth, mind covering the register while I have lunch?”

Gareth smirks, glancing between his boss and Steve. “As long as you save me a slice.”

Eddie salutes him with two fingers then rounds the counter to join Steve. “You alright?” He unties his apron with quick fingers, throws it over the back of his chair, then sinks down. “You look a little green. It’s not really your color.”

“I think.” Steve gulps softly, watching the older man dig into the pizza he suddenly doesn’t have an appetite for. “I think I just fucked up.”

Eddie, now with a greasy slice of pizza in hand, nods at the phone white-knuckled in Steve’s grip. “Anything to do with that?”

Steve takes a deep breath. “It was my ex.”

The other man pauses with the pizza halfway between his teeth. “Ah.” He clears his throat. “Please tell me you didn’t give the whole ‘baby I want you back, I’m nothing without you’ spiel?”

“No, no, quite the opposite.” Steve laughs at himself, wondering when he became the dumbest motherfucker this side of the Mississippi. “I told her I’m bringing a boyfriend to Christmas dinner with our combined families.”

“Oh.” Eddie puts his slice of pizza back down, frowning all the while. “Oh. So, you—that’s a lot of information to take in. Give me a sec.”

Steve realizes then that he just accidentally came out to Eddie. His spine jerks upright, fists clenching—an old defense mechanism from when he lived under the same roof as his father.

Before he can go too far into fight mode, Eddie waves his hand. “Calm down there, Bambi. That’s not what I mean.” He snorts, not unkindly, then pushes the pizza box toward Steve. “I’d be the hypocrite of the century if I gave you shit for liking dudes. I just mean I didn’t know you had a boyfriend.”

Relieved he doesn’t have to pick a fight today, and that Eddie is at least a little fruity too (though he’d had his suspicions, it’s nice to have confirmation), Steve huffs. “Yeah, no.” He reaches for a piece of pizza, trying to fight off the heat rushing to his face. “I don’t. That’s the problem.”

Eddie blinks at him for a long moment. “I’m going to need a bit more context here, my friend.”

“My ex,” Steve holds up his phone before putting it on the table. “Is bringing her new fiancée to Christmas dinner.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Basically, yeah.”

“And you told her you’re bringing a boyfriend because you… wanted to one-up her? Because gay dating is more commitment than straight engagement?”

Steve bursts out laughing, the sound echoing around the mostly empty bakery. Gareth glances at them briefly before going back to his dough, shaking his head. After a moment, Steve collects himself, nudging Eddie’s boot with his own under the table. “Yeah, sure. Let’s go with that. Sure beats the real reason.”

Eddie looks too pleased with himself. “And that reason would be…”

With a sigh, Steve admits, “I don’t want everyone to think I’m a loser.”

“Yikes.”

“Basically, yeah.” He takes a tiny bite of his pizza and sighs. Damn, but it’s good pizza. Thank God for whoever created pizza. “I blame Robin,” he says morosely through his mouthful of sweet ambrosia. “She brought it up last night and I just—I panicked. I heard her voice chanting in my ear to say it.”

Eddie snorts. “The devil on your shoulder is actually a lesbian with a medieval peasant boy’s haircut?”

“Hey!” Steve nudges him under the table again, harder this time. “It’s grown out since the last time you saw her, thank you. She looks much less like the berries and cream guy.”

“I’m telling her you said that.”

“You should! It’s been a while since she and I have duked it out.”

Eddie laughs and shakes his head. “My money’s on Buckley.”

“Hey!” Steve pouts into his pizza. “Way to kick a man while he’s down.”

“Listen, you’d have my vote if it was anyone else, but she’s scrappy. She’s got that vibe where she almost definitely killed a man in a past life.”

“Fine, sure,” Steve says. “But she’s also a raving lunatic who put the stupid idea in my head in the first place.”

Eddie shrugs. “I don’t think it’s that bad of an idea.”

Steve stares at him for a long moment. “I’m sorry, could you repeat that? I think I just heard you say Robin’s idea was a good one.”

“I did,” Eddie says. “I mean, it makes sense, right? You want your ex to know you’re better off without her, that you’re happy? Having a significant other is the most obvious outward expression of happiness—don’t.” He cuts Steve off before he can even open his mouth. “I know that being in a relationship doesn’t automatically mean you’re happy, but you have to see the correlation, right? You heard your ex is engaged and automatically assumed she was happy?”

“Yeah,” Steve agrees reluctantly. “Okay, sure. Say this is the best way to prove I’m better off. There’s one tiiiiiny problem with this plan.”

“Oh yeah?” He raises an eyebrow. “What’s that?”

“I’m still single, Eddie. And if I want it to look like anything more than a desperate pull to not look pathetically single, I would’ve had to start dating someone months ago. I can’t bring a stranger to my adoptive family’s home for a week. They’d see right through me!”

The older man frowns, staring off over Steve’s shoulder, and Steve can almost see the mental gymnastics Eddie’s doing. It’s kind of cute. He gets this line between his eyebrows, and his lips purse off to one side, and—

Eddie claps his hands. “Oh my god, I’m a genius.”

“Oh? Do share, Einstein.”

“Take me.”

Steve stares blankly at him, waiting for the punchline.

It never comes.

“You—I’m sorry, you want to be my boyfriend?”

Eddie’s face turns bright red. “Wha—no, no!” he splutters. “I mean—look, we’ve been friends for like, a year, right?”

Steve shrugs and crosses his arms on the table in front of him, intent on figuring out where Eddie is going. “Give or take a couple months. Why?”

“So, what if you don’t need a boyfriend, but just someone who could be your boyfriend?”

“You want to… pretend we’re dating?”

Eddie snaps his fingers in triumph. “Precisely.”

“Why would you do that?” Steve asks. He and Eddie are pretty close, but not the take-home-to-meet-the-folks type of close.

The older man’s chipper disposition slips for a moment. “I got a call from my uncle saying he’s going away with some buddies for a fishing trip until the new year on the Lakes.”

“Jesus,” Steve swears. “In December?”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Eddie chuckles. “But he’s my only family, and everyone in town pretty much sticks with their households or goes home for the holidays, so it’ll probably just be little old me. You could take pity on a poor, defenseless orphan for the holidays and get a fake boyfriend all at once! Consider your charity work for the year complete.”

Steve was going to turn him down, summing it up to another crazy person in his life spewing nonsense, but now he feels bad. And now that he’s thinking about it, it does kind of make sense. He told Nancy he’s bringing a boyfriend, so he can’t retract now. He has three options: admit he lied, say they broke up, or bring a real, human man home. Considering the first two options would only make him look more pathetic, he has one course of action.

Out of all the men in his life, Eddie is the one with whom he’s closest. His family doesn’t know him from Adam. He can make a case that he was being really private about their relationship and taking things slow. As long as they get their story straight, they could do it.

“I’ve never dated guys before,” Steve admits, halfheartedly looking for a way out before he talks himself any deeper.

“I’ve never fake dated guys before.”

Steve sighs into a laugh and rubs his forehead. “You’re sure this could work?”

Eddie nods firmly. “Absolutely, I am.”

“And you’re willing to do it?”

“Absolutely, I am.”

“Are you just going to agree with everything I say?”

“Absolutely, I am.”

Steve laughs and shakes his head. “You know what, I’ll take it. To hell with it! I’m in.”

Eddie leans forward on his arms as well, the pizza box barely separating them as the older man moves into his space. Steve blushes but doesn’t pull back. He’s never been this close to Eddie before, but if he’s going to be in a fake relationship with him for a week, he needs to get used to close proximity. Right?

He’s definitely got to get better at not blushing around Eddie, though.

“You gotta ask me real nice, though,” Eddie whispers, the timbre of his voice nearly making Steve shiver.

Ignoring the urge to just stare at Eddie like an idiot, Steve rolls his eyes, stands up from his chair, then drops to one knee before the older man. He brandishes a slice of pizza. “Eddie Munson,” he begins gravely. “Will you be my fake boyfriend for the holidays?”

Eddie clutches his chest and fans himself, holding back fake tears. “Why, Steve Harrington, I thought you’d never ask!”

[princessozera]

Can I request the brothers' reaction to MC who journals in her spare time? Not just writing but visual journaling - collaging, cutting papers and hoarding massive amounts of stationery like washi tape, stickers, paper, ink and stamps in a rolling cart? (Only because I do this and my headcanons tell me it's both cute and strange to them).

A/N: Thank you for sending in the request Anon, and I hope you like it!

GN!MC (they/them, 2nd ppov)

Word Count: 1.2k

The brothers with an MC that loves to journal

Lucifer

He first finds out when he trips over the books stacked in the hallway. You emptied out the shelves in the bookcases to make more room for your supplies and he hadn't noticed the books stacked up to his waist in the hall, so really that's on him.

Lucifer isn't fond of the mess but he likes that it's a relatively quiet and harmless hobby. He loves your passion for them, and with your permission goes through them to admire your work, complementing on your skill and techniques.

He gives you spare feathers to use as quills. They're high quality and shimmer when the light hits them just right- within a month you have a dozen gorgeous quills (all with a secret charm to always return to the cup on your desk, in case you lose them in the mass of papers or any of his brothers get funny ideas).

Being the head of affairs for Lord Diavolo and essentially being a head administrator and secretary gives him access to some pretty exclusive stationary. Whenever he goes to order more custom stationary for his desk, he takes an extra few minutes now to see what else the stores have and buys a few he thinks you'll like. He gifts them to you whenever you're feeling down or sneaks a few into your room just because he feels like it.

Mammon

He really doesn't get it, mostly because he doesn't have the patience to sit through the organizing and planning for even one spread. He messes up your organization while rifling through your things when he's bored, but will usually just chill in your room, relaxing while you do your thing (be prepared for him to do everything in his power to pull you away though).

Once he realizes how much time and effort you put into this, he'll tell his crows to keep an eye out for pretty things and rewards them if they bring back something he can give you to add. If you like doing dried flowers/plants and collecting nature things, he'll also ask them to bring extra nest supplies (his crows start to think of you as their other parent when they see him giving the things to you, so now they just come straight to you with the gifts).

Mammon insists you make a journal completely about him- he's definitely had enough magazine and fashion gigs to fill out up to 4 notebooks. If you ask nicely enough, he might even find a few old copies of magazines of before you came to the devildom and of his earlier years modeling.

Leviathan

Levi gets excited because he actually likes to journal too! His work tends to be a little bit more analytical (critiquing the anime and games he likes along with figuring out timelines and future plotlines), so he is in awe of your way of journaling. He'll ask you to teach him and start doing aesthetic-type of anime collaging, always coming back to ask for your opinion.

He specializes in gifting you anime and goldfish stickers. SUPER big on stickers.

As with any of his other hobbies, he is meticulous with his organizing and will help you arrange your things too. Want everything by color? Material? Subject? Just say the word and he's there to help you get everything into place.

His budget now includes money for supplies and printing paper/ink, and you get full access to his room to use these supplies. Levi is also not above complaining to Lucifer to make a new room for you two to craft in.

Satan

Satan considers himself to be someone who journals. However, his notebooks are pretty standard in their layout and absolutely crammed with notes over all the books he's ever read- the best and worst of them.

He's glad to share a hobby with you and takes an interest in how you do your notebooks- it's personally not for him but he admires your passion and dedication to getting the perfect layout. Will often invite you to his room so you can work while he reads- his room is less likely to be invaded by his brothers after all and since it's already messy, you can feel free to toss your supplies anywhere and everywhere while you're there. (Satan actually clears a corner for a cart where he keeps anything you may have forgotten and adds more glue/scissors/ other stationary staples when you start to get low).

Being as well connected as he is, Satan is often given free samples of products still not released to the public so he can give the shop owners feedback. Any time he gets journaling supplies, or something tied to your interest he immediately brings it to you for the both of you to review and give feedback on.

He absolutely has a favorite pen and highlighter and will gladly debate the qualities of a good marker/notebook with you (He'd probably hates anything that bleeds through the pages).

Asmo

Asmo doesn't understand your excitement over journaling but lets you talk your heart out, making sure to ask questions about your process and loves looking at your past work. Will probably ask to keep a few if you're open to it.

He's pretty handy in making scrap books when he needs to, so will suggest you two take on a month long project and make journals for each other! His is just a scrapbook of your time in the Devildom and suspiciously has more photos of you two than of you with the other brothers, but he pretends not to notice. He'll write everything in scented pens and put decorative borders on his notes of the pictures, highlighting how pretty he thought you looked in certain photos or how amazing that day had been.

Asmo secretly hopes you'll always keep it with you and look over it when your sad if you feel like you can't come to him.

Beel

Beel will always help you reorganize your room and move things around and will never turn you down if you ask him to carry a large supply haul home.

He thinks it's a it looks pretty similar to making a complicated photo album, but he has to admit you've got a talent with it, admiring your journals whenever you come up to show him.

Will always make sure to ask you how things are coming along if he knows you're working on a new journal spread and keeps an eye out for things you mention needing/wanting to include.

Doesn't question why you keep buying more things when you already have a mountain of unused supplies, just happy to go to the store with you.

Belphie

Belphie asks a hundred questions about why you journal and what you get out of it; it just doesn't seem worth the effort to him. But he can't deny the joy it brings you, so he'll often be found napping nearby while you're journaling and much like a cat, rest his head on your shoulder to watch your current progress.

Surprisingly artistic, he'll always be around to give you a second opinion about how you're placing things and what colors/stamps would look best for the page and entire theme.

Asks you to make him one about the Devildom solar system/ astrology based.

Has 100% busted his ass after slipping on scrap paper on the ground

[hermannsthumb]

possible prompt for a university au: newt is the biology major who maintains all the fish tanks in the physics building at 11pm and hermann is the physics student who likes to wander the halls to think. newt accidentally flings water all over the ground and hermann trips, hijinks ensue.

earlier today I was thinking about how I wrote a college AU fic almost 3 years ago to the date, and how I wanted to do more bc its fun thinking about newt and hermann as dumb college students

----

Newt's not really sure how he ended up with the weirdest work-study job on the planet, but honestly, things could be much, much worse (he could be stuck down in the dining hall, or dealing with confused freshmen in the school bookstore) so he keeps his thoughts on the whole thing to himself. Every Friday at eleven sharp, Newt pulls on his grodiest t-shirt and a pair of long rubber gloves and treks all the way over to the physics department to set to work scrubbing down the fish tanks that line the classroom walls. Why does the physics department have fish tanks? Newt's not really sure about that, either. It's kind of an insane amount of them, too, more than even the marine bio department has. Maybe it's supposed to boost morale or something. Hey, look at these crazy cool tropical fish who get to do nothing but eat and swim in circles, sorry you're stuck inside calculating velocity and shit.

Whatever, Newt's not complaining about that either. Let the physics nerds have their fun. It'll be good for them to branch out a little, realize there's life beyond robotics club meetings.

Also, Newt likes the fish. They're cute. He likes to think they like him, too, because they're very well behaved when he has to scoop them out of their tanks and plop them into smaller fish bowls (the kind goldfish in movies always use). He's going to teach them tricks eventually—he had a beta fish once who would do a little flip when Newt tapped the glass a certain way because he knew he'd get rewarded with dried worms, so Newt knows it's possible. Just imagine, a hundred fish doing flips on command. Newt Geiszler, fish whisperer.

Yeah, maybe the job could be more glamorous. It's really hard to get algae out of the gloves, and he hasn't been allotted the budget for a new pair yet.

"Hey, guys!" he shouts as he pushes in the door to room 214. The fish don't acknowledge him: they just continue swimming in their giant tank. In and out of plastic plants and rock caves. The rock caves were a gift from Newt three months into the job, and so were some of the moss balls—stimulation is important for fish! He wouldn't want to be trapped in a glass box with nothing to do, either. "I bet you missed me. Ready for a clean tank?"

Newt always talks to the fish, even if they don't talk back, because he thinks it's important to build their trust. He'll usually keep a running commentary of his week as he scrubs the tanks, just get everything off his chest that he needs to get off. Stuff he's worried about. Stuff that went well. Stuff that went badly. Therapy's expensive, and Newt's student health insurance can only cover so much, but talking to fish? That's free.

That's also kinda why he does it so late at night and over the weekend. The last thing he wants is an audience. Because, one, talking to fish is admittedly weird, and two, no one wants a glimpse at Newt's psyche like that, probably not even the fish.

The first step in cleaning the tanks is relocation. Newt digs his stereotypical goldfish bowls and an industrial-size mesh wand out of the supply closet, fills the former with some of the special tank salt water, and begins the slow and arduous task of scooping out the fish and depositing them into the bowls. "I had the lamest week," he announces once he's about three clownfish in. "I was working on a group project Saturday—"

Then Newt stops, because he hears footsteps in the hallway just outside the classroom.

Serial killer, Newt's instincts supply helpfully.

No, Newt corrects himself, that's dumb. Why would a serial killer wander into the physics building at eleven o'clock at night? Why would anyone, period? He's probably imagining stuff. Lack of sleep, stress over his upcoming projects, residual embarrassment from his disaster study session Saturday, all of it culminating in Newt thinking there's someone there. No, definitely imagining it. Newt can only even get in this late to the department because his ID swipe card is set up with the right permissions—not even the physics students have the permissions he does to be in this late at night. Well, not unless they clean the kitchenette in the student lounge or something.

Or if Newt left the door unlocked.

More footsteps. Closer now.

Newt's pretty sure he didn't leave the door unlocked, because he thinks it locks automatically behind him, and he would have to literally prop it open for anyone to get in after him. But anything's possible. The door could've caught on a dropped pencil or a paper scrap or other weird shit that physics students leave around, and a serial killer could've noticed and taken the opportunity to sneak inside on the off chance a hapless young biology major was scrubbing slime off fish tanks in the middle of the night. Any minute now, Newt's about to end up on an episode of Unsolved Mysteries. The Physics Department Murder. The Disappearing Biologist. (Nah, neither of those are very good titles, but that's why Newt isn't on the creative writing track.)

Step-tap-step. Closer now; Newt's heart leaps to his throat. Step-tap-step. Step-tap-step. Pausing just outside the door of room 214. God, why didn't Newt turn the lights off? Why didn't he shut the door?

Newt reaches for the first vaguely weapon-shaped thing he can find—an empty fishbowl, because Newt's not going to sacrifice any of the fish for this—and, as the door swings open, hurls it with a cry.

The bowl clunks on the ground. Except it turns out Newt grabbed the wrong fish bowl, because (even though it doesn't shatter, thank God) water quickly begins to seep across the slate floor tiles towards Newt's serial killer, a pathetic little clownfish (Newt thinks this one is named Albert, because the physics department is made up of nerds who do shit like name their random pet fish after their kind) flopping around in the puddle. Newt's serial killer, meanwhile, cries out similarly, his arms windmilling as he loses his footing and slips backwards, his cane—

Oh, fuck.

The intruder is not a serial killer. It's someone possibly worse, actually: Newt's mortal enemy, Hermann Gottlieb.

Newt's not really sure at what point Hermann became his mortal enemy and not just some guy I have class with that I hate, but he can pretty easily say that they've hated each other since the moment Hermann walked through the doors of Engineering 101 and was deigned Newt's lab partner by the Alphabetized By Last Name Seating Chart god. Something about Hermann just gets under Newt's skin. It's not his prissy English accent, or his oversized sweaters, or his absolutely horrendous haircut, and it's not even that he takes every opportunity to savagely rip apart every single thing Newt says in class. Don't get Newt wrong, that's all super fucking annoying, but it's annoying levels he can deal with.

It's the stuff they have in common that makes Newt hate him. It's like Hermann's a slightly broodier and more angular mirror that reflects all of Newt's most egregious faults—his arrogance, his stubbornness, his social awkwardness, his desperation to be taken seriously—right back at him. It sucks.

Plus, one time Newt caught Hermann ripping down the flyer he put up on the quad for Anime Club to advertise his stupid chess club instead, and he's never managed to forgive him for that.

Newt may hate Hermann, but he's not about to let him land on his ass in a puddle of fishy water (especially not on a freezing November night) just because the subsequent bitching would be unbearable, and, yeah, it would be supremely shitty of Newt, so he leaps forward just in time to catch Hermann and his cane before he hits the ground. He's so impressed with himself with his amazing catch that it takes him a few seconds to realize that Hermann is shouting and probably has been shouting since he slipped.

"—bloody maniac! What on earth are you doing in here? How are you in here? Did you just assault me? I'm going to phone campus police, you wretched—"

"Hold that thought," Newt says.

He rights Hermann and snags the mesh net and rescues poor Al before it's too late, dropping him back into the big tank with the rest of his friends. Newt can't be sure, but he thinks Al blows a bubble in thanks at him. Maybe he needs to make friends outside fish.

Hermann is still yelling at him.

"I am going to tell the head of the department you're—you're skulking about in here after hours!" he declares. "You're a menace. Pay attention to what I'm saying to you, Newton!"

Newt sighs and turns around. Hermann's turned an interesting shade of red—sort of like an over-boiled lobster, or if he fell asleep in the sun for too long. Newt wonders if it's from embarrassment (almost falling on his ass) or anger (almost being knocked on his ass). Probably anger. "Look, dude, I'm sorry," Newt says. His face twists like he ate a lemon, and he hopes Hermann doesn't notice. Newt hates apologizing to Hermann. "It's my job to clean the tanks every weekend. You scared the shit out of me and I freaked out—it's just that, like, no one ever comes by this late. Ever." He decides not to mention the serial killer thing. Hermann might make fun of him for being jumpy or paranoid or something.

Hermann's scowl doesn't lessen, but he does nod. Plus, he stops shouting. That's as much as Newt's gonna get of forgiveness. "Hmph," Hermann says. "You clean the tanks?"

"Every weekend," Newt repeats. He realizes he got some fish tank slime on Hermann's button-up when he caught him. Oops. Hopefully Hermann won't notice until Newt's in the safety of his dorm. "Gotta pay for my textbooks somehow." Then he frowns. "Wait, so what are you doing here? I didn't know you had access to the building this late."

Maybe Hermann is the kitchenette-cleaning guy after all. But, to his surprise, Hermann sniffs and casts his eyes to his dorky Oxford shoes. "Er," he says. "It's just—I was having trouble working out a solution to a problem, and thought a walk might do me good. Chilly nights like this one always do. And I quite like this building at night—it's calm, and much quieter than my dormitory." He fidgets. "And—well—only don't say anything to anyone, but I rewrote the permissions of my ID card so I could come and go wherever I please ages ago."

"You rewrote the permissions?" Newt says. "What the hell, wouldn't you have to hack into the security system or something to do that?"

"Well, obviously," Hermann says.

Despite himself, and despite Hermann being his Mortal Enemy, Newt is genuinely impressed. "Dude," he says. "That is so badass." Since when has Hermann been a badass?

Hermann's eyebrows jump, and he blinks at Newt behind his dorky librarian glasses. What twenty-one-year-old wears librarian glasses? With a chain? "You think so?" he says.

"Uh, totally," Newt says. "What problem were you stuck on? The one from Saturday?"

Being lab partners for engineering means Newt and Hermann have to collaborate on pretty much everything, including their midterms. Their midterm is what they've been working on for the past two weeks. On Saturday, though, they met in neutral ground to work on it (a reserved study room in the library), and, after a stupid and massive argument that had the librarians hoisting them out by their shirt collars and threatening to ban them for life, Hermann called Newt an idiot and stomped off into the night. Newt still hasn't gotten around to giving the problem another shot. Whatever, they have another week before the dumb thing is due. Plenty of time. Hermann nods. "Yes," he says. "Er—that one."

Newt glances at the clock ticking away on the wall. Quarter after eleven. Hermann's delayed him a whole fifteen minutes. Technically, he reminds himself, he doesn't actually have to have the tanks scrubbed by Friday night—he has the whole weekend to get it done. Also, he kind of feels like he owes Hermann for attacking him the way he did. Accidentally attacking. "Listen, Hermann," he says, feeling totally insane for what he's about to suggest. But he kind of wants to know more about Hermann The Badass. "What if we went back to my place and worked on it together? I'll buy us pizza, and I have, like, a bunch of energy drinks." The pizza place nearest campus is open until three in the morning, almost definitely because they get all of their business from sleep-deprived undergrads. Plus, they have midnight specials where you get free breadsticks with every pizza. Newt could go for some breadsticks. "It might be...fun," he adds.

Fun? With Hermann? Hermann will think he hit his head or something.

But to his surprise, Hermann doesn't hesitate even a second before saying "Alright, then."

"Oh," Newt says. He honestly thought Hermann would put up more of a struggle. "Cool!"

"But I might need to borrow a jumper," Hermann says. "If you'd be so...courteous, that is. I'm a bit chilly."

For some reason, the thought of Hermann (Newt's mortal enemy, but also a secret badass) curled up in one of Newt's baggy sweatshirts makes Newt feel all weird and warm all over. He swallows a few times, because his throat feels a little weird, too. Too tight. Like he just ate something he's allergic to. "No sweat," Newt says. "Let me just get these fish back in the, um, the tank. And—" He waves his slimy, gloved hands. "Take these off. And clean up that puddle. Gimme—um, gimme like, ten minutes?"

"Of course," Hermann says, and gives Newt a small, terse nod.

From Hermann, it's a smile. Newt almost slips on the puddle he's so blindsided by it. Stupid Hermann, making him feel all weird and clumsy.

[mythgirlimagines]

(1/2) Once upon a time, there was my own fanganthat I cancelled, because I chickened. V3 Males (Lucky Student; Gardener; Extraterrestrial Journalist; Bar Consultant; Seamster; Folk Tales Writer; Academic Prodigy; Swindler)

Ah cool talents!

Rantaro Amami: (Lucky Student)

He supposed he did have a general lucky streak.

It wasn’t anything too big, though.

Just a bunch of smaller things.

Ryoma Hoshi: (Gardener)

He enjoyed spending time in the garden.

Even things like pulling up weeds were pleasant.

Plants were just…easier than people.

Korekiyo Shinguji: (Extraterrestrial Journalist)

His articles were some of the most followed in the discipline.

And of course they were.

He was one of the most credible extraterrestrial journalists because of his first-hand evidence.

Gonta Gokuhara: (Bar Consultant)

Mostly, since he wasn’t of age, he handled advising on budgets.

Though he loved being able to help however he could!

Maybe he would have a Shirley Temple on occasion.

Kokichi Ouma: (Seamster)

He could tell right away when someone’s clothes needed hemming.

He usually handled all those kinds of repairs for his classmates.

Though there was a lot more he could do than just that.

Kaito Momota: (Folk Tales Writer)

His grandparents had always taught him the importance of folk tales.

So he wrote them all down, all the different versions he’d encountered.

He just wanted to preserve them all for future generations.

Kiibo: (Academic Prodigy)

Kiibo had always had the best grades in his class.

He spent a lot of time studying to keep it that way.

He hated it when people thought it came naturally.

Shuichi Saihara: (Swindler)

Not a lot of people realized he was a swindler.

That’s what earned him his title, after all.

He wasn’t sure how Hope’s Peak found out, actually.

[nellynee]

The makings of greatness, or why, as a ride or die Treasure Planet stan, I’m glad there’s no Treasure Plant 2

You ever see somethings that makes you unreasonably angry? Yes I understand exactly what I’m saying, and how that indicates that my emotions and opinions on this are exactly that. Opinions. There’s a good chance I have some objective truths mixed in, but that does not make my opinions based on those truths truth. If you disagree or have different tastes or opinions or interpretations, cool, let me know! maybe you’ll change my mind. That being said.

The plot synopsis for the Treasure Planet sequel makes me angry. Not like, actively so, just annoyed enough to be in a bad mood. And now you guys all have to be in one as well. Why?

Reason 1, and probably least important: Disney sequel syndrome.

Ok so Disney sequels aren’t inherently bad. I’ll stan the Aladdin sequels to my grave, who knew Cinderella could world build, obligatory Rescuers Down Under (the first one was better) blah blah blah.

But there is an inherit problem with sequels in general, and that usually has to do with cast and crew. An original piece of fiction has to grab the audience yes, but there’s also freedom in that. Media touches people in different way. The worldbuilding can mean more to some than others. Some are in it for the animation, or the character developments, or relationships. What connects with one person won’t connect with another. The problem with sequels is that different people who worked out the original material might and usually do not work on the new. And those new people are already working on that new material with their own personal lenses and experiences and interpretations coloring the old. The reason sequels (and remakes, and big budget presentations of other materials like books into movies) tend to bomb hard is because you are essentially being forced to accept someone’s fanfiction into the canon material. Usually, there’s a pretty strong correlation between more successful franchises/extension material, works staying true to the core material, original crew working on the material, and the enjoyment of the audience.

And sources say very few of the original crew remained. Some yes, but mostly voice cast. Even worse, TP2 was a DisneyToon production, not even a mainline feature. Now I’m not saying the new people weren’t talented, or passionate about the project, or were lacking in experience. It doesn’t really matter if any of those things are true or not. It’s the warping of their personal lenses I don’t trust. Fanfic I can disregard, meta I can disregard. This would have been canon.

And reading the Artbook makes is abundantly clear that the parts that touched me personally would have been missing. The very core of Treasure Planet for me was the relationship between Jim and Silver (and their exquisite animation budget). However you choose to interpret that relationship, you can not deny that Treasure Planet is a powerfully emotionally romantic movie. It’s quiet moments and emotional resonance shaped my views of intimacy with a sharp and fine touch. Silver and Jim’s bond is as undeniable and powerful as it is compelling and awe inspiring to witness unfold.

And a lot of that is owed not only to  the voice acting of Joseph Gorden-Levitt (Jim) and Brian Murray (Silver), But to animators Glen Keane and John Ripa, who were the head animators of Silver and Jim respectively. Not only did Gorden-Levitt and Brian Murray deliver stunning performances, but made sure to work together and jointly play off each other in ways most voice actors don’t have the opportunity to do. And the Masters Keane and Ripa took an already stellar and carefully crafted vocal rapport and took it one step further. I highly recommend the Artbook as a good read, both Keane and Ripa talk about the journey of discovering who Jim and Silver were with delight, acting out entire scenes together using their own body language to build the characters together, using the same animation reals to animate, tag teaming in and out of the program rather than do it separately, becoming so attuned with their characters attitudes and mannerisms that you can tell they poured entire pieces of themselves into Jim and Silver.

I’m not saying the Sequel would have been inherently bad because it’s a sequel, or because a new crew worked on it, but I am saying I wouldn’t trust it with a ten foot pole.

Reason 2: Thanks I hate it (I’m saying it’s inherently bad because the plot is bad and I hate it)

I’m sorry for the length, but for you to really understand just how bad this is, I actually have to pick through every single line and tell you why it fails critically at some junctures and where it would be so simple to fix. For those of you who were unaware that there was a sequel in the works at some point, I’m pulling these quotes pretty much wholesale from the AnimateVeiws article Buried Treasure: The ill-fated voyage to Treasure Planet 2, specifically the interview with Jun Falkenstein who was set to direct the now canceled sequel. Spoiler warning, I guess?

So, from the begining

“The sequel was to pick up where the first film left off, with Jim Hawkins going to the Royal Interstellar Academy. At the Academy, he is a hotshot “natural,” but he doesn’t follow the rules very well.” - Strong start but then dropped the finish. I think the interstellar academy would be a very compelling starting point. I see no fault in it at least, it’s a good opportunity to world build. Clemence and Musket like to make a point that Jim was crafted to connect with the emotionally wounded and distant youth in a age of divorce, so showing what happens when that youth hikes up their britches and gets to work can extend on that theme aaaaaaand you dropped it. Dropped that strong start. Yes, Jim was more than a bit of a bite back rebel in the film, but that was a reactionary response to the bad place he started in. Jim was abandoned, and tied his self worth into that abandonment. His kickback against society was a reaction stemming from an inability to see his personal worth and any sort of future he could craft from it. He outgrew this, his very character development was about this in the film. His character arc was about realizing his inherent worth, embracing a sense of confidence and learning what he could do. Even disregarding that, bonus material outside of the film shows that Jim has a very strong sense of respect for Captain Amelia, her military career, and the hard work she put into it, and he’s there on her recommendation. Why would he act out in this? He is a natural yes, but the film shows he’s incredibly sharp and intelligent, if unlearned, and more than ready to learn given opportunity.

“Hence, he gets off to a shaky start – especially with his classmate Kate, who is very smart and has a type A personality. Kate’s father is Admiral Blake, the Commander of the Navy. Jim and Kate vie for top of the class but have very different skills.” - So building off this to fix the problem before. I guess the dynamic they are going for is something like “the kind of a jerk hotshit hotshot who’s got it all figured out and the straight laced rule fallowing stick in the ass rival”? I’m not apposed to to a rivalry, but lets tweak this, given how “hot shot natural jerk” isn’t really where Jim settles at the end of the film. Jim is a natural talent, who excels under tutelage, but more importantly, he has practical experience. While the time period spent on the RLS Legacy is not defined, they do sail to a deep and unexplored part of the galaxy, probably well outside of regular settlements, so no small distance, though Jim is young enough that a very long period of time would be noted in physical growth. Given comparisons to classic nautical sailing of the source time, months, perhaps up to a year? That’s a long time to spend, learning the rough and tumble basics, tying knots, experiencing food and water rations, extreme temperatures, playing with the rigging and mechanical aspects of the boat. Jim knows what it’s like to actually sail. Meanwhile, this is the Royal Academy, who probably takes in upper class second born children and pumps out military accolades for well learned mathematicians and strategists. Jim doesn’t fit in because he can visualize, he can think outside of the box, he can weld a damn engine to a hunk of shrapnel and ignite it freefalling against a metal hellscape and outrace a boat in a high adrenaline situation. He adapts where the other’s frantically look through their notes for the answer. Worse yet, he’s poor and not classically educated. Make it a class issue. In this aspect I do like Kate. Being the Daughter of the Commander of the Navy, she probably has a very technical and far more expansive understanding of navel ships, particularly the running of them. In this way Jim and Kate are perfect foils. Jim representing the poor, instinctually and practically knowledgeable crew, and Kate the upper-class, technically knowledgeable command, a dichotomy representing the haves and have nots in their skills, experiences, an class.

I don’t want to post a picture and break the post, but I do love Kate’s design. I do recommend looking up the article and checking it out. that being said, being a feline species, they messed up not spelling it Cate.

“Captain Amelia is dean of the Academy, which has a brand-new vessel: the Centurion.” - I… why, why is Amelia the dean? Additional material shows that Amelia broke ties with the military because she didn’t like their rule stickling ways and red tape. Why would she want a red tape position? She helped with a war and then bailed first opportunity to become a freelance captain so she could fallow her own rules. Even if you don’t know any of that additional material, you do know that she is a freelance captain. Why is she dean? what happened to the old one? Are they dead? Did DisneyToon kill them? Did Disneytoon kill the old dean?

“Designed by Doctor Doppler, the Centurion is the fastest ship in the galaxy.” - HE’S NOT THAT KIND OF DOCTOR!

“B.E.N. is its pilot”. - NO

In all seriousness all three of those statements show a serious problem, in that none of those characters are in fact those things. Amelia I’ve already explained. But Doppler was a debatably youngish bachelor with too much money who was fascinated by astronomy specifically and who suffered from ennui. And BEN was a navigational unit, so maybe it makes sense for him to be a pilot, but why is a robot who was functioning under a galaxy feared pirate for who knows how long given any kind of agency over a brand new incredibly important ship? These decisions were probably made to incorporate as much of the old cast as possible, to not exclude fan faves. But any decision that makes BEN a prominent part of the plot and thus gets more screen time is a BAD one.

“The pirate Ironbeard desires to commandeer the Centurion. This ruthless villain is relatively all iron – almost nothing of whom he originally was, inside and out, is left.” - On the one hand, I have a weird feeling that this would somehow violate the 30-70 rule. Buuuuut on the other hand, the Artbook does describe the decision making process of what and how was mechanical on Silver (my favorite tidbit was the wheel on his head representing his constant thinking and assessing) and states that that they in a way represent the pieces of humanity he gave up looking for Flint’s Trove. Extending that to a pirate who has given up everything could be a powerful thematic tool if used right (or intentionally)

“He leads a group of pirates to hijack the Centurion while Jim and Kate are aboard.” - ok, yeah, I’ll buy that. If they are butting heads constantly, I could see them sneaking off to the new piece of hardware to one up each other on who knows their stuff, or maybe bond over wanting to learn about the said new tech and being frustrated with restrictions.

“The Navy can’t catch the Centurion, due to the vessel’s speed and armor.”- sure

“Jim and Kate escape the Centurion. Jim decides he needs a pirate to help catch pirates. They find his old buddy Long John Silver in the Lagoon Nebula, where he is running a smuggling ring. “ - So what Jim just goes “I know just the pirate to help us” and then finds him? That journey of itself deserves it’s own movie, anything less is a disappointment. Alternative. Jim and Kate escape onto a particularly lawless planet. Jim has some tricks to keep them safe and fed, maybe he even excels in ways he’s been straight up stop gapped at the academy. Maybe his knowhow is appreciated by others who society also rejects. But Kate is a frustrating fish out of water, getting offended and worked up over things that are big deals to an average citizen but not criminals and pirates. But such reactions are putting them in danger and she needs to get perspective fast. It’s plausible maybe that Silver tracks them down through interesting rumors, but more than that, let it be fate. Neither having any idea the other is there till the second they see each other. Bonus points if Jim and Kate get in a bind and Silver is the leader of the harassers. Better yet lets add some thematic mirroring not only to the scene where Silver saved Jim from Scroop, but directly contrast it to the scene where Silver doubled back and down against the notion of caring for Jim when called out before the mutiny. *kisses finger* Touching and hilarious.

“ Silver agrees to help when he hears about the Centurion. “ -  Silver agrees to help when he hears about the Centurion without Jim even having to ask. Storywise, lets make some kind of deal over how Jim, an upstanding enrollee of the academy, apparently is chummy with a pirate. Tension doesn’t just have to be external, and Kate is the daughter of the Commander of the Army. Maybe she’s recognized and this gets them in trouble. Maybe Kate has issues with her identity outside of her father’s career and need to learn a lesson about being outside of a rigid social structure?

“Jim and Kate receive a tracking signal from B.E.N. – who is currently hostage aboard the Centurion – and follow via Silver’s creaky vessel. They discover the Centurion docked near the Botany Bay Prison Asteroid. “ - While being the fastest ship yet is a good excuse for wanting it to get stolen, my suspension of disbelief breaks a little at any ship, let alone a creaky little pirate vessel, catching up to the fastest ship yet, or the tracking signal being the only way to track it to a guarded prison. Seeing as how I’ve written BEN out of this scenario lets fix it. After the events of the movie, the Royal Military swoops in after to confiscate the debris of Treasure Planet. For those in the know, canon lore states that the Planet was a giant computer, and it and the map were the byproducts of an ancient and advanced civilization. Studying the debris led to the Centurion, notable not for it’s speed, but for it’s stealth. It can cloak itself. Which is why no-one can find it. Meanwhile Silver lets it slip that he snagged the map from it’s pedestal as they escaped the planet as a souvenir. (handwave why the portal was still open with a “the whole thing was exploding, the computer froze). The map is able to track the remnants of said planet, aka the Centurion, meaning Silver has the only means of tracking the cloaked ship

“Ironbeard is using the Centurion to disable Botany Bay’s security systems. Jim, Kate and Silver sneak aboard the Centurion, where Silver reveals to Jim that he wants to take the Centurion for himself. He asks Jim to join him.“ YES. YES YES YES YES YES YES! Understanding that  Jim’s decision to not go with Silver in the first movie is key here. He rejected Silver’s offer the first time because Silver had shown him he had intrinsic value, and Jim finally felt that the natural gifts he had were worth cultivating, that he did have the chance to explore who he could be on his own terms. Jim was comfortable being on his own, because he felt capable. Now, Jim and Silver bring out the best in each other, and the time apart has done them harm. Jim’s strings of social rejections are starting to fell like a glass ceiling he can’t overcome, and is finding more and more comfort in being a big fish in a pirates small pond, and the emotions of of being wanted that come with Silver is a powerful drug. But it’s a one way ticket away from any opportunities he could work towards, not to mention his barely repaired relationship with his mother. Meanwhile Silver has been slowly slipping back into the colder, more selfish self he was, a necessity for his lifestyle, and doesn’t want to loose his connection to Jim and what Jim brings out in him, but is still far enough gone to make the offer and try for the boat anyways, even if he knows it’s not what’s best. It’s an emotionally compelling decision. You want them to say yes, you know they shouldn’t

“Kate overhears this and is horrified, especially since the two have, of course, started falling for each other during the adventure.” - Hate. this I hate. Leaving shipping to they way side, what’s that “of course”? why do they have to fall for each other? Why the Disneytoon sequel love interest? I have a feeling her characterization would come at the cost of it. Why can’t they be rivals? why can’t they develop a mutual respect outside of attraction? Why can’t they both learn an individualized lesson about finding their own place in the world outside of social constraints as foils without macking? I hate this concept. Kate overhears, and is horrified, because Silver is a Pirate which is actually in universe get yourself hanged offense, and Jim is considering this, and they are going to steal a VERY IMPORTANT BOAT and and leave her stranded in a dagerous prison, and are making an objectively morally bad decision.

“Ironbeard discovers the intruders, charging into a fight in which Silver is injured. Meanwhile, the other pirates throw down ladders to the prison below, allowing swarms of elated prisoners to climb up into the ship. Silver, Jim, and Kate exit the Centurion amidst all the confusion. However, Ironbeard shoots down Silver’s ship. They plummet to the prison asteroid below, crash-landing” - cool. Drama. But for my purposes, lets tweak it so Silver isn’t injured yet. But I really want to emphasize that this attack does not interrupt before Jim can react to Silver’s offer. Even something as tentative as “I’m not sure” has consequences. None of this “misunderstanding” BS.

“ Kate is angry at Jim and storms off. “- again, make it clear that Jim showed a real chance of agreeing to steal the ship. if she’s angry before he had a chance to answer that’s contrivance for drama’s sake. Give her a reason to be mad

“ Jim is about to blow her off as well when Silver tells him to give her a chance. He reveals a part of his past through a flashback, when a young (non-cyborg) Silver screwed up a relationship with the love of his life – a decision which directly led to his life of piracy. “ - nope. nope nope nope . I’m gonna put a big old * here because this is reason number 3 why I hate this potential movie, and I will get to that believe me, but here’s me, putting a pin in it. That being said, have Silver selfishly try to double down on getting Jim to join him in a three way argument instead. This is the conflict of the film. Kate, who was learning to grow outside of the strict restrictions of her life and do her own work, make her own way, is being rejected. She is as morally repulsed as she is hurt that she wasn’t included, and hates herself for that hurt as well. Jim is torn between the freedom of what he could be after the academy paired with the strict social constructs around it, and the freedom of a life “full of himself and no ties to anyone” but running from the law and the two friends they represent. Silver is the aggressor here. He likes Kate, he does, but he loves Jim and only has one place in his heart, and has spent his life being selfish. There’s already a crew on board, and Iron beard is hooked into the Centurion. With having the only other means to navigate, they take down ironbeard, the rest will surely fall in line. This is paydirt. A fantastic ship, a bloodthirsty crew, and Jim.

“Silver has a very dangerous cargo with him that he had been trying to smuggle and sell for a fortune, which has the power of a neutron bomb. Jim, Kate and Silver reconcile and work together to fix Silver’s ship and prevent the Centurion, filled with the most evil pirates in the galaxy, from going on an insane robbing-and-killing spree. At the last second, Silver reluctantly gives up his “retirement fund” in order to destroy the Centurion, with Ironbeard and all the pirates on board.” - this entire section needs rewritten. That’s a mcguffin Silver put it away. I have retconned the mcguffin to be the old map, so that is now moot. Now to not blow up the ship. Afterall, Silver and Jim have both already overcome what Treasure Planet represented with it’s destruction. Rather, B plot

If we are that desperate to have past characters in, let’s have Amelia and Delbert back home. When the Centurion is captured, Amelia immediately volunteers to fallow, feeling responsible for Jim and secretly pining for some adventure. Delbert feels the same, and he to a bit of an adrenaline junkie after the events of the first movie, but they have the children to think about and only one can leave. Delbert is the one chosen to help by the navy officials searching for the Centurion. While Amelia bickers with the Admiral Blake over his pragmatic but emotionally distant decisions over the situation of his missing daughter, Delbert is an astronomer, and is blah blah blah science meta, fallow the flashing  and bending lights around the cloaked ship to find it. As in Delbert is helpful. Amelia in a reflation to Admiral Blake, is torn between her family and commandeering her own ship to help. Blake is frustratingly headstrong in his decisions, and the script makes it seem like that emotional distance is disinterests, but reveals to the audience that it incorporates a great deal of suppression of his anxieties and worries over his daughter, and trust in her abilities, though he has issues expressing this pride to Kate herself. Amelia, Delbert and fam make what is probably a poor decision in commandeering a ship and leaving on their own to track the Centurion, the navy hot on their heels.

Back to A plot, the navy is approaching. Jim has to make a decision. He is the only one who knows how to unmask the ship using the old ones tech without training, as it’s based off the map. While Kate and Silver are distracting iron beard, he has to either steal the ship and sail off, or uncloak it for the navy. Iron beard is taken down, but not without Silver getting injured. Jim decides that Silver’s life is worth more than anything, and after agreeing with Kate that she’ll commandeer a doctor and wont let Silver die, uncloaks the ship. The Centurion is retaken in a blaze of naval glory that is the action climax. The pirates fight back up are over run. Maybe Kate gets taken hostage as the Admirals daughter, as an opportunity for a resolution with her arc as Blake’s distant daughter, though obviously said resolution comes at her showing her abilities in taking care of herself and the practical skills she has learned.

“Silver again parts from Jim and Kate, telling them to take care of each other. A few years later, Jim and Kate graduate with honors, while a proud Silver secretly watches from the shadows, smiling” - Boooooo. Kate and her dad make up, and she challenges him that she’s going to one day Captain the Centurion, with him understanding that she needs less a mentor and more an emotional support while she works her way up the ranks. She invites Jim to be her first mate, to which Jim accepts as a navigator, (a thing I’ve pointed out to be his real strength in another post). But to Silver, who has been “pardoned” for his part in retaking the Centurion, the movie hinting that he to would be on the eventual crew there I fixed it fic to come I s2g.

yeah there’s a lot of good there, but it’s so easy to fix the bad it’s frustrating. which brings me to

Reason 3: that little pin

“ Jim is about to blow her off as well when Silver tells him to give her a chance. He reveals a part of his past through a flashback, when a young (non-cyborg) Silver screwed up a relationship with the love of his life – a decision which directly led to his life of piracy. “

Nope nope nope I’ll tell you why.

First of all, sources like the artbook say that Jim is so Important to Silver because he’s the first person Silver has ever let become important. he’s specifically stated to have no family, never married, no children. And that’s something he cultivated actively. His life of piracy, his metal limbs, his loneliness and moral failings were all gleefully accumulated for one reason and one reason only

Treasure Planet.

Treasure Planet was the great love of Silver’s life. It was a lifelong obsession. It destroyed his body, took his youth, his opportunities and nearly his life. He broke Jim’s heart over it.

And he let it go. For Jim.

And Jim understood this

This is the crux of treasure planet’s very themes. This is where Jim found self worth. Another person finally looked at him and said “you matter, you matter more than anything. I like being around you and I choose you first.” and it made Jim realize he’s someone worth choosing.

The treasure was EVERYTHING to Silver, and Silver let it go, for Jim.

That one line there, attributing the start of Silver’s fall to a girl? that actively retcons the entire theme of the previous movie. IT rewrite the emotional linchpin of Silver’s sacrifice of the gold. And actually fuck that. right into the ground. I do not accept. I do not pass go. I refuse. Fuck you non existent movie. That makes me mad. every single time. Hate I shall never let go.

No