#“Forgive me. But I don't answer to that name any more.” well the idiot does not know your real name so...

[ninchen1909]

Jealousy II

Warnings: few curse words, angst with a happy ending, my not existing knowledge about medical stuff or injuries (blame Grey’s Anatomy)

Word count: 2.400

Hey,

thank you so much for so much positive feedback on the first part, it really meant the world to me, I hope you also enjoy this part.😊🥰

I hope you have a great day, night or whatever

 Erling POV

"I love you"

I sadly watch as the door slams shut behind my girl's back and my whispered words are drowned out by the loud slamming of the door. For what feels like an eternity, I just stand there and look at the now closed door. Everything in me screams to run after her, to bring her back home and sort this whole mess out. But my princess has always been so clear about what she wants and doesn't want, and she's made it perfectly obvious from the start that she needs and wants her freedoms, which is why I suppress my protective instincts as best I can. With drooping shoulders I return to the living room, the annoying voice of the sports presenter penetrates my ears and I can't help but immediately turn off the TV. Suddenly, an oppressive silence fills our house.

Guilt overcomes me like a hot, blazing fire. How could I be so stupid as to insinuate that she would cheat on me? But Jude and (Y/n) got along so well the whole evening, laughing and joking together without a care in the world.  Actually, I should have been happy that they got along so well, but the only thing I could think about in that moment was "What if she finds Jude more interesting than me?". Prettier, smarter just better?" "What if she leaves me for him?". Looking back, these thoughts were idiotic. But in that moment, all the old insecurities came back up and overtook me. (y/n) never gave me a reason to doubt her loyalty or love, never made me feel like she only wanted me for my money or fame. At the end of the day, I can't explain why I reacted the way I did. I can only say that I regret it now, so fucking much. Again and again my eyes fall on the living room clock, my whole body tense, as I wait for her to come back. Everything in me burns to apologize properly to her, to beg for her forgiveness. Nervously I run my fingers through my hair, with every passing minute the tension in me grows and when (y/n) is not back after an hour, the tension turns into pure fear. Heat rises in me and I don't know what to do with myself, again and again my eyes wander to the front door, in the silent hope that she will return any second. But in vain. With a loud sigh I let myself fall onto the sofa, my fingers nervously tangling with each other. Seconds feel like minutes, minutes like hours. But nothing happens, no sign of my girl.  I jolt as the shrill ring of my cell  breaks the unusual silence in our house.

A quick glance at the display triggers joy in me, with quick fingers I answer the call.

"Hey darling, are you on your way home, yet. I really want to tal....?"

"Am I speaking to Mr. Haarland ?"

A friendly sounding female voice rings out to me, but it doesn't cause the same heart palpitations as the voice that usually answers at this number.  

Confused, my eyebrows draw together.

"Yes, you are, but who are you?"

"My name is Ms. Smith, I am calling you because you are listed in this cell phone as the emergency contact for Miss. (y/l/n)."

"Emergency contact? Why does my girlfriend need an emergency contact now?"

My mind is racing, almost desperately trying to suppress the unpleasant thoughts, fear settles in my heart."

"Mr. Haarland, please try to calm down."

My breathing quickens and the phone in my hand begins to shake. Still, I try to take a deep breath and give the woman on the other end line my full attention.

"Your girlfriend was hit by a car...."

My heart stops for a few beats, only to continue beating at double speed. I don't give the woman on the phone a chance to finish her sentence.

"I'll be right there. What hospital is she in?"

As I am still speaking, I make my way to the hallway to put on my shoes.

I internalize the address, which Ms. Smith relays to me before I end the call. Cold sweat forms on my forehead and I feel like I am no longer in control of my body. My teeth sink themselves in the tender flesh of my lip, the strange taste of iron soon fills my mouth.

This is all my fault, if I hadn't overreacted she would never have gone outside. We would be cuddled up on the sofa just enjoying each other's presence, while I would watch her laughing at the ridiculous jokes the characters of our favourite TV-show would  make.

Silent tears stream down my face as I steer the car through the dark streets of Manchester, my fingers clawing almost painfully into the smooth leather cover of the steering wheel.

The drive happens as if I'm in a trance; at that moment, I'm acting as if I'm on autopilot. Without thinking much, I only function to reach my destination.

As soon as I enter the large brick building, the acrid, unpleasant smell of the disinfectant hits me and burns unpleasantly in my nostrils. Hectically I look around. People hurry from one room to another, while others sit quietly in the waiting area, hoping to soon get an update on their loved one. I try to block out all the hectic and the noises witch surround me as best as I can, while I make my way to the reception desk.

An older woman, with dark black hair sits behind the light brown wooden desk as she  looks at the computer screen in front of her with a solid disinterest.  The light blue light reflected in her black horn-rimmed glasses.

Bored, she lifts her gaze as she notice my presence one of her thinly plucked eyebrows shoots up.

"How can I help you?"

Just like her whole expression, her voice makes it seem as if she would prefer to be somewhere else entirely.

"My girlfriend (y/n) (y/l/n), was involved in an accident."

With slow fingers, she types something on the keyboard. Impatiently, I drum my fingers on the cold surface of the table, which earns me an annoyed sigh from the woman in front of me, but i really couldn't care less about her impression about me.

"Your girlfriend is still in surgery right now, please sit down  in the waiting room, a doctor will come to see you when the surgery is finished."

Her voice sounds monotone and cold, as if she has memorized these words.

"Can you tell me something, anything, about her condition?"

Under other circumstances, I'm sure I would have surprised myself at how desperate my voice sounds, but I couldn't give a damn at the moment.

"Do I look like a doctor to you?"

"Listen, I'm sorry to bother you like this, but I love this woman, alright?  I just want to know if my girl is okay. So please, if you know something, let me know"

My words seem to spark something in her, as her hard, unyielding features, are now surrounded by a gentle warmth.

"I'm afraid I can't give you any information about your lady friend's health, but I can guarantee you that the staff at this hospital will do everything they can to help any patient to the best of their ability. And as soon as they can, one of them will be able to give you information, but for that, please go to the waiting area."

Resignedly, I drop into one of the uncomfortable blue chairs before burying my face in my hands. Silent tears leak from my eyes and run straight down over my cheek onto my neck.  

Seconds turn into minutes, minutes into hours, but in this moment time doesn't have any meaning whatsoever. With each passing minute I become more nervous, my hair standing out in all directions, and my eyes aching from all the tears. Again and again I look up hopefully as a doctor enters the room, only to hide my face back in my face, when they pass by me.

Desperately, I watch the other people in the waiting room, as they receive information about their loved ones in surgery. So many different emotions surround me, tears of happiness and sadness, cursing, praying, break downs, people clinging to each other in the hope to find comfort due a touch.

What will my reaction be?

Only after two more seemingly endless hours does a doctor approach me. Her long, brown hair bobs with every step she takes. As quickly as I can, I rise from my chair.

"Mr. Haaland?"

Mutely, I nod as I take her hand, which she holds out to me.

"I'm Dr. Parker, I'm the attending doctor for Ms. (y/l/n)."

"How is my girl? Is she alive? Is she in a lot of pain? When can I go to s.."

"Mr. Haaland, I know a lot has happened, but you need to calm down a bit, all right?"

Again, I can only nod mutely.

"First of all, your girlfriend is alive..."

At that very moment my legs give way and I drop backwards onto the chair, a million stones fall from my heart and I feel like I can breathe properly for the first time in hours.

"Your girlfriend was hit by a car on a crosswalk and got dragged along several meters. As a result, her spleen ruptured and the blood that leaked from it collected in her abdomen. However, we were able to repair this injury thanks to an emergency surgery, the bleeding was stopped and the blood is now being eliminated from the body with the help of medication. In addition, two of her ribs were broken, as well as her left arm. Fortunately, we were able to immediately rule out injuries to the skull, which shows us that Miss (y/l/n) was remarkably lucky. If you ask me, it is almost a miracle that she got off relatively lightly. All the superficial injuries like abrasions and bruises will be gone in about a week or two, the fractures and the spleen injury will take a little longer, but in 9 to 10 weeks, they should be completely healed. Mrs. (y/l/n) will have to stay here for another week or so, but then she will be allowed to leave the hospital, subject to certain rules. She’s still under narcotics right know, but it’s only a matter of time, until she wakes up again.

Happiness erupts in my belly like a firework and tears start to brim in my eyes.

"Thank you so much Doc, you can't imagine how happy you’re making me right now. Can I see her, please?"

I look at her with pleading eyes, only to return the smile she gives me.

"Of course, follow me I'll take you to her."

With quick steps I follow her, down the endless seeming corridors of the hospitals.

As soon as I open the door to her room, the air gets stuck in my lungs. Even though I know my girl will be better soon and she won't suffer any consequential damage, it doesn't make this sight any easier. The steady monotonous beeping of the equipment penetrates my ears, while the bitter smell of disinfectant settles in my lungs. It is with great difficulty that I can hold back the sobs that start to rise. My princess lies bolt upright in the narrow hospital bed, a sterile white varnish envelops the body, which is so familiar to me, her arms lie rigidly next to her torso.

One of them is surrounded by a bulky, white plaster, abrasions extend through her face and neck, only the constant up and down of her chest won't let me completely collapse. I tremble slightly as the doctor speaks in a calm, tender voice. “I’ll leave you two alone now, if anything happens or if you have any questions,  just press the emergency button. ” She points to a small red button at the head of the bed. “I will, thank you. ” “It goes without saying. I wish you both the best of luck”

With these words, she leaves the hospital room, her doctor’s coat waving in the air.. With timid steps, I step up to the bed, only to grab  her small hand. The unusual cold that emanates from it strikes me in the heart and I strengthen my grip around her flesh, in the hope to give her some warmth. “I’m so sorry my darling, I was such an asshole. I let my insecurities get the better of me. You never gave me a reason to doubt your loyalty or love. Please forgive me, I’ll spend my life trying to make it up to you. ”

My voice sounds broken, devastated even. Gently I raise our clasped hands upwards to breathe a tender kiss on the back of her hands, before I lay my head on it.

A uncomfortable Silence falls over the small room, only to be broken, by the soft delicate voice of my angel. “You really were an asshole. ” Surprised , I jerk up my head to look at the beautiful woman in front of me, her eyes radiate exhaustion, the pain meds clearly taking a toll on her. The normally soft and tender  voice now rough and hotter. Instantly I grab the cup of water from the bed side table, before holding it to her lips, carefully I help her drink from it. “I was and I’m so fucking sorry. It’s all my fault, that you lay here. If I wouldn’t have be so stubborn, you wanted to talk about it an I ju…  ” As so often in the last few hours, I can feel the moisture of the tears on my cheeks. A sob escapes my throat, when I fell her soft, tender skin on my cheek, her thumb softly traces patterns on my wet skin. “Babe, it’s not your fault, if anyone is to blame, it’s these wannabe Formula One driver, but not you. We’re in a relationship, we love each other and when you love each other you also fight from time to time. And it’s a sad fact that the people you love the dearest, can anger you the most. I just hope you know I would never cheat on you. ” “Yes, darling, I know, I’m just afraid you’ll wake up one day and realize you could have a better man, one who will always be there for you, who can hold you every night, and not being in another country. One who can always be present in the important moments of your life, in person and not only on Facetime.  ”

Tears stream down my face, while soft sobs shake my body. With a soft grip on my neck, she tugs my body into hers. With her healthy hand she runs up and down my back in a soothing motion. “Shh, it’s alright love, everything is alright. I love you, only you. There will never be a better man in my opinion, you’re it for me.” ” “I love you too. So fucking much.” ” Our lips meet in a gentle kiss, our body’s entangled in each other. After what feels like a eternity our lips separate themselves from each other. I lean my forehead against hers, as I hear a soft chuckle escapes her swollen lips. “ “Well, now  that we’ve  cleared up. . . ” With a gentle movement she’s leaving my embrace, only to create a way to big distance between us. “. . . would you please swing your ridiculously large body into that bed. Even though I’m the one who got hit, you look way more shitty than I do, and trust me, that means something.  So let’s go to sleep. ” Unable to even begin to argue, I strip my shoes off my feet and leave them on the carelessly on the floor, before I gently lie down next to my girl. Always careful not to hurt her. As best I can I wrap my arms around her body and feel her laying her head on my chest. Slowly, one of my hands wanders into her hair, where I start lovingly stroking over it. “Did I tell you, you look really hot even in that weird hospital gown? ” Her hotter, yet beautiful laugh permeates the room. “You are such an idiot. ” “Ha! jokes on you, because I’m your idiot. ” She lifts her head off my chest and looks at me with her beautiful eyes, which are filled with pure, unconditional love. “Yes, that you are. And I couldn’t be more prouder about that. ”

[iamdeceived]

Hi, this is just a cute story!

Warnings: have you drunk water today? What are you waiting for? Want a kidney stone?

(English is not my first language, so please forgive me for any mistakes!)

🦋 Female reader 🦋

*♡*

You were the only woman on Yondu's ship. That meant a lot.

You had your own room, and your own space to do your thing on the ship. Despite appearing tough and frowning, Yondu has always been very understanding with you. With the differences between the sexes of the two of you. He treated you how you would want to be treated and that was that.

Sometimes, you felt the eyes of Yondu's subordinates on your body. At first it bothered you. Now you don't care anymore.It was you who went after Yondu, and asked to be part of his crew. At first the captain thought it absurd. Until you show your skills. Ever since then, you've been hanging out with this bunch of misfits. They have become your family.You didn't even have family on Earth anyway. Nobody cares about you there. Now, with the Ravagers you not only feel like you matter, you really matter.

*⁠♡*

Yondu was furious. Your subordinates are a bunch of imbeciles. They made him lose an absurd amount of money, for some silly thing. "Why didn't I take Y/n? She would have done a much better job than all of them put together!"You just wanted to rest in your room. But you saw when Kraglin came to you, to get away from the captain.

"He's furious! I think he wants to rip my head off!" He spoke, you listened to him as you read your book.

"After all, why then did you lose the customer?" You said, without taking your eyes off the book. "It's just… well… look Y/n… Don't laugh!" You have closed your book. I Am very curious now. "I won't, I promise!" He sighed "Look, we weren't there at the appointed time, because the boys and I saw a library… We know how much you like books, so we were going to bring you some books as a gift…. And then we lost the time." You felt a flush creep up your cheeks. "Oh Kraglin, you guys are adorable! Thank you so much for thinking of me!" You hugged the man awkwardly in front of you, and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "Does Yondu know that's why you wasted your time with the buyer?" Just mentioning the captain's name made him turn away from you. Yondu loves you, and he is very jealous . "That would only make him angrier!" You smiled.

You love these boys!

You had a "secret" affair with Yondu a few days ago. But everyone there, including the guardians themselves, knew you were going to be together at some point.

"Don't worry, I'll talk to him myself!" Kraglin nodded yes. Before leaving his room, he took a package out of his pocket. It was small. It fits in the palm of your hand. "I only managed to bring this." His eyes sparkled. You opened the small package and saw the leather book. It was the story of an alien town. You enveloped Kraglin in a hug.

"I loved it! Seriously, thank you so much! You're a great Kraglin!"

You popped one more kiss on his forehead before he staggered out of your room.

*♡*

You devoured the book Kraglin gave you at an astonishing rate. It was on the last pages, when the door opened and Yondu entered. He is frowning. Maybe stressed.

He settled down beside her on the bed, and wrapped his strong arms around her waist. He relaxed his head into his chest. And threw a leg over yours.

You immediately took your hand to your head, to caress. "Tired, dear?" He muttered a yes. "Kraglin told you why they wasted time with the buyer?" Yondu snuggled even closer to you. "It did. That idiot!" You laughed.

He looked really tired when he asked "Honey… Can you read to me?" Without answering him, you started reading aloud. As a mother would for her child. You felt Yondu relax on top of you. He was sleeping.

You put the book on top of the dresser, and got ready with it on the bed. And then you let tiredness overcome you.

The angry buyer and the lost money were completely forgotten.

[quinloki]

as somebody who is really interested in tarot but is SO BAD at memorizing the card meanings (i've decided to just make my own custom oracle deck at this point), i'm curious if you had any headcanons/thematic ties between the major arcana and one piece characters??

hope this isn't too far out of left field! <3

IT IS NOT - THIS IS FANTASTIC

Two of my favorite things - MY TWO FAVORITEST THINGS IF I HAD TO PICK \o/ THIS IS LIKE A FREE CHRISTMAS

Forgive me, this'll be a bit off the top of my head, so I may make adjustments at some later date, but I absolutely MUST do my best to answer this RIGHT NOW. (I'm vibrating I'm so delighted by this \lol/)

0 The Fool/Luffy - The Fool isn't an idiot, as some people assume based on the name of the card, he's on a journey - as a matter of fact, it's a journey he takes *through* the major arcana. He learns about the world, and himself - about injustices and his own morals and limits. The Fool is about the journey.

1 The Magician/Shanks - The Magician is effectively the Fool's first teacher. The Magician card is as above, so below. He's all the major suits, he's magic and power. Good or Evil isn't relevant (though generally it's always positive to see this card).

2 The High Priestess/Nami - The Priestess is strong girl power - well, strong "things we often associate with feminine energy". She doesn't back down, she knows her strengths, and her weaknesses. There's a bluntness here too, and a fierceness. It's very "That look Nami gave Sanji on Whole Cake Island."

3 The Empress/Nico Robin - The Empress is more a motherly vibe and less a Strong Boss Lady vibes. She's caring, nurturing, protective, but not restrictive. There's a caring vibe that resonates with this that isn't really found in the Priestess.

4 The Emperor/Jinbei - I'm just name some moments - Making Luffy remember his nakama, giving him his blood, not joining when he wanted too - joining when he could do it right. Supporting Luffy even from a distance. Stern, strong, wise, educated, Supportive. Big Good Masculine Vibes.

5 The Hierophant/Monkey D. Garp - The hierophant is a teacher of sorts, kind of a societal vibe vs what The Magician teaches. Here to show you the path you "should" travel. Not necessarily the path you're going to want to travel - just know the road's probably going to be bumpier if you don't listen to him, but contextually, it could be more rewarding.

6 The Lovers/Roronoa Zoro - The Lovers Does NOT MEAN JUST ROMANTIC LOVE or sexy love or whatever. The Lovers is a card about dedication, devotion - being there for someone completely, and that person being there for you completely. Partners. This is a good Kid x Killer vibe card too.

7 The Chariot/Thousand Sunny - The Chariot is about motion, but controlled motion. There's generally no reins being depicted for this card (sometimes there is), but the person is still in control. The crew didn't have much direction when the Merry Go was their ship, but comparatively, they did with Sunny.

8 Strength/Usopp - Strength isn't usually talking about physical strength. It's strength of will. Why Usopp? Facing off against Luffy was an immense show of strength, and his growth after that was even more so. It's very much inline with the card.

9 The Hermit/Sanji - The Hermit doesn't *want* to be alone, but the Hermit often needs it. Not the kind of alone that means shoving everyone away, the kind of alone that sits on the bow of the ship and contemplates their sense of self. Sanji has a lot of work to do in this, but I also think he's a character who has done a LOT of it long before he met Zeff.

10 Wheel of Fortune/The whole bloody series honestly - The Wheel Turns, and things change. This card means whatever is going on now, isn't going to be going on tomorrow. The good times will end, the bad times won't last forever. Everything changes. Appreciate the good while you can, and weather the hard times knowing they won't last.

11 Justice/ - Hrm.

12 The Hanged Man/Trafalgar Law - Sometimes the best thing to do is nothing at all. Sometimes you need to just Stop and Think about things. Maybe Law over thinks sometimes (he certainly has the whole "sacrifice oneself for the greater good" vibe going one, which can also be a thing for this card.)

13 Death/The Going Merry - Change is inevitable, and while the Wheel is about day to day changes, Death is about BIG changes. Changes that don't leave you the same as they found you. Changes that can break you if you don't roll with them - Changes you CANNOT outrun.

14 Temperance/Several Characters- Temperance is about balance, a lot like Justice, but with Temperance there is emotion that you don't find in Justice. My knee jerky reaction places several characters here - Robin's mom, Nami's mom, and Rosinante (my apologies for being bad with names and not wanting to break from this to look them up.) These people all had a strong connection to temperance - doing what needed done, not because of logic or justice, but because of love.

15 The Devil/Doflamingo - The Devil is about choice. Generally it's about negative choices and not positive ones, because it's about the chains that bind us to the things that pull us down. It's about crumbling and failing because we chose to do things the way we did. I liken Doffy to this, since we often don't see what it is we're doing wrong, and with the wrong people around us, well, we just keep going headlong into the wrong path. (Doffy isn't the devil in this card, Trebol could be, but Doffy is definitely the one in chains).

16 The Tower/Marine ford - I don't know that I really need to say anything else ^^;

17 The Star/Silvers Rayleigh - Thinking back to how this is story of journey for the Fool, Rayleigh is the perfect character to follow Marine Ford. He didn't heal Luffy like Law did, he didn't heal him like how Jinbei did. He just offered hope - a chance to recover from the rough and harsh lessons that came before him, and make sure Luffy could continue forward on his own.

18 The Moon/Momonosuke - Wary, anxious - the moon is about intuition, but not "oh I knew they were gonna kiss" kinds of intuition. It's about knowing something is wrong, something is looming, something is unavoidable and you don't know WHY you're nervous and afraid (or maybe you have an inkling) you just are. The moon is fear of the unknown, and it's not a card that has any answers most of the time - you just have to get through it.

19 The Sun/Sabo - It's his memories coming back, him meeting Luffy in the Coliseum, eating the fruit, holding that newspaper to his chest and smiling like a DOOF when he sees his little brother is doing well. It wasn't necessarily all rainbows, but there's clarity there - everything is illuminated, no shadows. Shit hurt for a while, but he can see the good in it all.

20 Judgement/Portgas D. Ace - This card isn't so much about wiping the slate clean, as it is realizing that all your flaws, scars, mistakes, etc. have helped make you who you are. It's about accepting your flaws and either incorporating them, or improving yourself to lessen them. Honestly the most heart breaking thing about Ace is how he was doing this, he just never got the chance to see it through.

21 The World/Joy Boy - I'll just leave this as this for now. ^_^

[themuseandantarctica]

* 𝒂 𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒏

sentence starters from christopher isherwood’s novel a single man. change however necessary.

tw: death, drugs, age gaps (between adults, no pedo.philia), some n.sfw text

i'm afraid of being rushed.

why? why? is it some cosmic entity, some arch-tyrant who tries to blind us to his very existence by setting us against our natural allies, the fellow victims of his tyranny?

such questions are hard to take seriously. they seem so academic.

intolerable old [name], always absolutely in the right, and crazy.

oh well, i expect it'll last our time.

the question "is this playacting or does he really hate us?" never occurs to them.

put them back, now! back! put them back!

i never hear the noise children make -- just as long as it's a happy noise.

do they know that they are afraid? no. but they are very afraid.

among many other kinds of monster, they are afraid of little me.

even when they are geniuses in spite of it, their masterpieces are invariably warped.

[name] wasn't a substitute for anything. and there is no substitute for [name], if you'll forgive my saying so, anywhere.

would you possibly be free tonight?

poor man, living there all alone. he has a kind face.

idiots -- fooled them again!

what is he up to?

these people are not amusing. they should never be dealt with amusingly. they understand only one language: brute force.

but does [name] want to be obeyed? doesn't he prefer to be defied so he can go on killing and killing -- since all these people are just vermin and the more of them that die the better?

no time to worry about that now.

it is a slander to say that they are identical.

the only ism i believe in is abstract expressionism.

is this some supersubtlety?

let's see if that old robot'll know the difference.

will any of them make it? oh, sure. one, at least. two or three at most.

you're always paying.

[name] wanted me to ask you, sir -- we were wondering if you could manage to get out to us again before too long?

won't this keep happening to him all through his life? won't he keep getting himself involved in the wrong kind of game, the kind of game he was never born to play, against an opponent who is quick and clever and merciless?

sorry, sir -- i lost you for a minute there.

they look as if they were ready at any minute to switch from studying to ditchdigging or gang fighting.

she has the look of a divorcee.

how can i impress, flatter or otherwise con this cantankerous old thing into giving me a good grade?

i must say, i don't see how anyone can pretend to be interested in a novel when he doesn't even stop to ask himself what its title means.

it's not much fun being beautiful for ever and ever, when you can't even wake up and look at yourself in a mirror.

well, what does [name] want them to say it's about? they'll say it's about anything he likes, anything at all.

wow! i don't dig that jazz.

what do we need eternity for, anyway?

the stupidest text in the bible is, 'they hated me without a cause.'

a minority is only thought of as a minority when it constitutes some kind of threat to the majority, real or imagined.

it's better if we admit to disliking and hating them than if we try to smear our feelings over with pseudo-liberal sentimentality.

why, you wouldn't recognize love if you met it! you'd suspect love!

well, after all, what else can you expect?

is this sheer idiocy or slyness?

i keep remembering that beautiful accent. it's like music.

i have to go down to the book shop.

you don't have any of those capsules left now, do you?

i bet, even if you had seen god, you wouldn't tell us.

someone has to ask you a question before you can answer it. but it's so seldom you find anyone who'll ask the right questions. most people aren't that much interested…

a place where the police are angels has to be an insane asylum.

the not-understanding, the readiness to remain at cross-purposes, is in itself a kind of intimacy.

isn't it some tiny satisfaction to be of use, instead of helping to turn out useless consumer goods?

just the same, it is a deadly bore and, to be frank, a wee bit distasteful.

want to go? we might ask him some awkward questions.

now we have with us a far more terrible fear, the fear of survival.

[name] stood me up. talk to me.

they're being cheated out of their childhood. they're being turned into junior consumers!

how can you talk such incredible nonsense?

that fills them with fury and loathing because they can never understand it.

essentially we're creatures of spirit. our life is all in the mind.

the nurses at the reception desk are pleasant, too. they don't fuss you with a lot of questions.

i am woman. i am bitch-mother nature. the church and the law and the state exist to support me.

i was screaming. they heard me clear down the hall.

it seems as if they can't bear to leave anything the way it used to be.

where's that fucking nurse?

if you'll just step outside for a moment. this won't take any time at all.

did she mean goodbye?

it will be a good christmas, the merchants predict.

i am alive, i am alive!

you old ass, who are you trying to seduce?

there is always an atmosphere of leisureliness in this place.

these things just kill me. man!

nobody is bitchy here, or ill-tempered, or inquisitive.

even up here, they are building dozens of new houses. this area is getting suburban.

the supermarket is still open; it won't close till midnight.

who says i have to be brave? who depends on me now? who cares?

look -- is it too late to change my mind? about tonight?

who can it be at this hour?

they might notice something queer about me, and you'd feel ashamed.

hey -- you can't die here! ain't this heaven?

the author gets slightly vague, so i've had to improvise a bit. i mean, he doesn't come right out and say so, but i have a suspicion that one's supposed to make it with human flesh. actually, i've used leftovers from a joint…

i've already made two new year's resolutions -- only they're effective immediately. the first is, i'm going to admit i loathe bourbon.

you know, i sometimes think, about you, whenever you do something really sweet, you're ashamed of it afterwards!

how many times, when [name] and i came to visit you -- sulking, avoiding each other's eyes, talking to each other only through you -- did you somehow bring us together again by the sheer power of your unawareness that anything was wrong?

he has made up his mind, really and truly. he wants a complete break.

i know you think he hasn't behaved well to me, [name]. i don't blame you for thinking that.

i betrayed you, [name]; i betrayed our life together.

i keep wondering just when it began to go wrong.

so here we are, just the two of us. just you and me.

i mean, until i've done that, i won't feel everything's really over. you have to do something to convince yourself.

i never wanted to live alone, [name].

how can you pretend you don't love it? and you miss it -- you wish you were back there -- you know you do.

i'm not sure how i should like that part of it.

whatever you say about it, darling, you always make it sound so marvelously romantic.

what's the harm? it's fun. it adds a new dimension to being drunk.

[name] not enjoying himself? he was having the ball of his life!

we were always making plans like that. we hardly ever told other people about them, even you. maybe that was because we knew in our hearts they were crazy.

no, [name], cross my heart, i am honestly not being bitchy!

feeling guilty's no reason for staying or going. the point is, do you want to go?

i think i shall go back, [name]. i dread it -- but i'm beginning to think i really shall.

i had to tell her at once, right after it happened. otherwise, i'd have been so afraid she'd find out for herself, in some uncanny way, and that would have been too shaming.

the past is just something that's over.

i can't stand anymore indecision. i've got to burn my boats, this time.

i should hate so to leave you, [name].

we could get drunk and earn money at the same time.

do women ever stop trying?

you are drunk. oh, you stupid old thing, how dare you get so drunk?

oh, the bloody battles and the sidewalk vomitings!

seashells are still less easy to find here than discarded rubbers.

it was nothing. only a poem.

but imagine your happening to pick on this particular bar!

do you really think i'd be such an idiot as to try to buy drinks for a minor?

you could invite him to stay the night at your place. tell him you'll drive him back in the morning.

you can talk about anything and change the subject as often as you like.

that's the trouble. i don't know what is important and what isn't.

the past doesn't really matter to most kids my age. when we talk like it does, we're just being polite.

maybe i will. maybe i'll get mad at you.

if you and i are no different, what do we have to give each other? how can we ever be friends?

whatever made me tell you all that? am i drunk or something?

i, personally, have gotten steadily sillier and sillier and sillier.

well, i'm not bluffing -- so what are we waiting for? you weren't bluffing, were you?

that's enough for now!

they ought not to let you out on your own, ever. you're liable to get into real trouble.

don't be an idiot. you'd get pneumonia.

you don't even have a cat or a dog or anything?

i believe you've discovered the secret of the perfect life!

getting married? no. that's out.

i don't believe you're that much interested whether i marry [name] or not. i think you want to ask me something different.

so now she's called the whole thing off?

you aren't exactly sober, if you don't mind my saying so.

and now get me another drink.

i suppose you've decided i'm a dirty old man?

don't you have a glimmering of how i must feel -- longing to speak?

the point is -- here am i and here are you -- and for once, there' s no one to disturb us.

it's the enormous tragedy of everything nowadays: flirtation. flirtation instead of fucking, if you'll pardon my coarseness.

thought maybe i'd better split, after all.

that was great, this evening. let's do it again, shall we? or don't you believe in repeating things?

quick -- we need a substitute!

yes, i am crazy. that is my secret; my strength. and i'm about to get much crazier.

what if [name] has been scared off? what if he doesn't come back?

this is where he found [name]. he believes he will find another [name] here. he doesn't know it, but he has started looking already.

but is all of [name] altogether present here?

how can such a variety of creatures coexist at all?

both will have to be carted away and disposed of, before too long.

[jtrokujo]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐓𝐇𝐘 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐎𝐗𝐈𝐂¿

paring: Mikaela Hyakuya x fem!Reader

(they’re 18+!!!)

word count: 4k

warning: this story contains sexual content

gerne: smut

summary: there are days when they get along well but there were also days when they hated each other like the plague and even though they love each other?

—

The weather is neutral, but I wish it got better.

The sun is obscured by the gray clouds, but it's not windy or anything.

You could even go out with a top.

However, y / n decided to take a seat in the four walls with a number of different books and a tall pile of books right next to them.

As she gently leafed through the pages of the somewhat older book, she felt a stab.

Of course it didn't hurt since no one was attacking her, but it felt like someone was watching her.

Without presenting her feelings, she took some books and put the rest where she got them.

Immediately after leaving the library, she stopped in the middle of the path and said with an annoyed sigh, "Bathory, I know you're here."

He stands grinning in front of y / n, but could hardly show a disappointed face.

With his head tilted to one side, he looked at his prey and smiled at her immediately. "I prefer you to call me by my first name, dear."

“I do what I want and not what you want, Bathory. Besides, I have better things to do than waste my precious time being influenced by you. "

When they told the vampire, she continued on her way, or at least intended to.

As quickly as he came, he grabbed her arm just as quickly. "But y / n, why is it in such a hurry?" asked the vampire, amused, pressing more and more on hers with every second, so slowly you could hear her bones. Y / n had to react immediately!

Without thinking for a second, she dropped all of the books on the white floor and immediately grabbed her gun. "You should let go of me!" y / n's voice rang out down the hall and immediately shot the vampire in the arm.

His blood spurted around her.

Y / n got his blood on her face as well as on her clothes - it was the same with Bathory, also the wall and especially the floor got his blood.

"Disgusting." mumbled y / n and wiped the blood on her face, although she knew herself that it would be of no use.

"What's going on here?" Everyone but not him.

"Hello Mika!" said Ferid with delight and turned to get a better look at him.

"Have you lost your nerve again?" he asked me annoyed, but he only looked at me for a few seconds and immediately saw Ferid's blood spatter.

"What do you mean 'again'?"

Even if we've known each other for a long time, we both have to admit that one and the other have diverged. Sometimes it was his fault, sometimes it was me. There were of course moments when we got along really well, but in the end they weren't enough in my opinion.

"Since you've lived with us, at least one vampire must have got something from your weapon."

Said the blond-haired vampire while his eyes stared at me.

I'm not understating when I say that his eyes alone make me feel naked.

Mika only manages to control me through his eyes, even though I should be the one who should control every vampire or the various books I spend most of my time on just one more bad joke.

It was enough for vampires to exist and more than hundreds of people took their own lives just to be able to enjoy themselves. To this day I cannot forgive any of the vampires for what they did to me or those around me. I know myself that there are bad ones, but what is their goal?

Or do you have a goal?

"Y / n." I heard his voice.

Awakened from my trance, I see his eyes again. However, they do not have this previous aura, no, they are a little stricter this time. When I gave him a sign of his attention, the lecture immediately came, "You are old enough to know how to behave and with whom to behave. If you show this behavior to someone else, I'll let that person do it . " and do what they want, because I haven't had the nerve for someone like you for a long time. So finally know your limits before I use my weapon against you! "

Impressive. From sentence to sentence his voice grew louder and louder. Seriously, I never expected or even had the idea of ​​this side of Mika in my life, but here it is. Wonderful y / n, now you have managed to sink deeply with Mika, which is actually the very last thing I ever wanted to achieve in my life, but life has never been a paradise.

With a chuckle, Bathory put his arm and my shoulders and spoke to Mika.

"But, but Mika shouldn't be so strict with her. She's just a little girl again, not even now, is she?" "If I were that little girl, you would surely have two arms instead of one." After saying my sentence, I picked up the books that were still on the floor and didn't say goodbye to anyone, why should I?

Bathory is nothing more than an idiot who uses his satisfaction to see others suffer rather than provoke them too.

While Mika nudges both children like a father, although the other is to blame for everything.

When I got to my room, I put the books on my table and sat on my bed, thinking about the old days. However, I don't think of the days with loved ones that I lost, but of those that I spent with Mika before he gave me a “better life”.

I could leave it all behind at any time and either not start an old or a new life, but I love to have him in my heart for it.

Sighing at my thoughts, I give up and stood in front of my closet for the next minute.

While the lukewarm water felt the white bathtub, my clothes landed on the floor.

This life is more of a calling expected of others than a life of its own. A break does no harm to anyone.

I said to myself and after a few seconds I closed my eyes.

After my bath or a break from the real world, I'm just choosing which book to read.

As I was about to start the new book, someone knocked on my door.

Hesitantly, I said the door was open and waited for the person behind it to appear. Please leave it all but Bathory.

Sighing, I immediately put my hand on my left breast and saw him, Mika.

To be honest, I'm happy to see him, but I'm not, but I don't need an explanation. "Good evening." he said in his usual tone. Without making a big head out of it, I repeated it myself, but added if he needed anything from me.

Shivering, I answered my question in the negative and came up to me with slow steps.

The only thing I could do was do nothing. I stopped. When our faces are a few centimeters away, his arm came slowly towards my body, until he reached for something, when he had this in his hand, he came back with a few steps and immediately held a book in my face.

"I really recommend it, I have to say, you have pretty good taste when it comes to books. I've read it several times because these stories, the writing style, the plot and most of all the characters are up to me." uniquely well written down to the smallest detail. "

I looked at the vampire in amazement. "You read that too?" "Y / n, if I hadn't read it, I wouldn't have a clue either."

A little ashamed of my oh-so-intelligent question, I also looked at the floor.

The whole time there was nothing to be heard, neither a little intoxication, nor even breathing. But after a few seconds, Mika also broke the embarrassing silence by taking a few steps and holding out his arm to me. I don't understand it about myself. When Mika is around, I either act annoyed or neutral. However, countless butterflies gather in my stomach when I think of him alone!

"Y / n ... y / n?!" Mika looked up, gave me a neutral look and at the same time held a few strands of my hair and asked me if he should tie my hair up with a towel. I gently took the wet strands of hair from his hand and began to giggle at my discomfort and nervousness. The thought of me being weird was always out of the question.

"I think I'll blow dry my hair. I'll see you at dinner or tomorrow."

"I'll see you at dinner or tomorrow." repeated Mika before she disappeared from my room.

Locked in the room and caught in his deepest thoughts, he stared over the ceiling.

The reviews of that day haunted him to this day when he also dreamed them.

Sleeping now wouldn't be for him, even though it is shortly before 2 o'clock.

But what can you do about it?

The vampire rose from the bed, stretched out, and decided to go for a walk immediately.

As he walked through the empty corridors, he always hoped not to meet anyone.

Whatever stays that way.

Bored and hands in his pockets, the floor caught his attention. It didn't take long, however, because he was amazed to get up when he saw the light coming from someone's room.

He was more than sure whose room, or rather chamber, it was.

It was Y / n's.

He stopped in front of it, thinking, held out his hand and wanted to knock on the door. At the same time he quickly put his hand in his pocket. This scenario takes about 3 minutes. But it wasn't the vampire's nervousness that was unusual, no, why should he be at y / n's door? This is funny.

Doesn't he often seem annoyed or stern in your presence?

Well, he doesn't even know what's going on in his head.

After an eternity, the vampire finally knocked on the human's door and immediately heard "Come in" from the other side.

Without telling himself twice, he opened the door and saw her. He saw her spread out on the large bed with several notes and books.

Stressed out. You can't see it from the outside, but even Mika can confess that he thinks it is strange to see y / n at this time.

"Do you need something?" she asked him and fixed him with her gaze.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping long ago?" he asked and at the same time crossed his arms over his chest.

"Mika, I could ask you that too, don't you think?" sigh y / n and slowly start piling up her notes and books together.

When Mika offered her help, she politely declined and slowly and carefully put the things on her desk.

"If you have nothing special to do, you can always keep me company, you know?"

Yes, even if there is an argument between the two, they still get along well. However, they don't seem to be as close as they used to be. Without saying anything, Mika accepted the offer and sat next to y / n.

Was that really wise?

The smell of y / n gets over his head, but he's not as easy to lose control as other vampires.

Breathing hard, Mika rubbed her eyes and hoped that this unbearable smell would go away any moment.

Easier said than done.

If only I had drunk blood in the last few days. The vampire cursed.

Y / n noticed his unusual behavior and tried to communicate with him, but to no avail. She called his name several times, tapped him on the shoulder, and shook him a little. He seems trapped in his own world. For the first time she seemed to see someone so trapped in his own world. When will he regain his senses?

Annoyed, she hit his skull with her fist, which led to a groan of pain from Mika's mouth. "What does this mean?!"

“If you are tired, please go to your room and sleep there.

Both rolled their eyes in annoyance.

"You have nothing to say to me, human."

"Oh really? What are you going to do about it, vampire?" It wasn't a mistake by y / n, but rather Mika's mistake. If he hadn't called her a human, she wouldn't have called him a vampire. Nobody except Mika knows right now how much he hates vampires and yet he is one himself, but you have to remember that he never wanted to be one. Not everyone is lucky in life.

As I said, even if it was his own fault that she reminded him, he completely lost his nerve. Slowly she approached y / n, she already felt the dark aura coming towards her. However, y / n did not want to show the fear that is in her and slowly rising above her head. She will regret it. "Repeat when you have the pity." "What is the problem? You called me human and I called you a vampire, but you know what makes me be silly, get out of here, vampire. ”Without further ulterior motives, Mika grabbed her wrist and squeezed the bones with her hand listened from print to print. When she wanted to reach for her gun, which is under her top, Mika was a second faster and threw it directly to the end of the room. When Mika immediately released his hand from Y / n's wrist, she saw an emotion in his eyes, sadness.

He was hurt, but shouldn't he care? What should a little person who plays with little guns do against a vampire, ask him about a game? However, he saw her more as a person, he saw her as someone he can love, with whom he can laugh, of course he had had these people before in his life, but they have long since disappeared. Oh how much he loves her.

If only she knew how many letters he wrote her, but never gave them to her, but hid them in his room.

"I'm really stupid." Mika muttered trembling to herself. Y / n heard it and slowly walked up to him "Mika, that was very childish of me and, to be honest, I'm sorry." When she tried to touch his shoulder, he knocked her away and looked into her eyes, it was their fault.

“I don't want your decisions! I never wanted to be a vampire! If you don't know anything about me, please be quiet and think twice before you open your door! ”The whole room went quiet, pretty quiet. It was rather uncomfortably quiet for y / n, but she preferred to keep her mouth shut because it looked like Mika was looking for the right words. "Why do I love you? Tell me Y / N, how can I love you when you hate me so much?" His voice was fragile and it was tormented to hear it that way. "Mika, I had never hated you before." Exhausted, Mika sat down on the floor and looked at the gun at the other end of the room. "Every time I see a gun like that, I hate myself even more." “Even if it sounds a bit clichéd, for example because of the current situation, I have to and want to admit that I love you Mika. You are in such pain and apparently you have torn old wounds. You didn't deserve that, nobody deserved that. ”Y / n sat like Mika on the floor and hugged him. Her warm body against his cold one. As if in slow motion, their faces stood a few inches apart until their lips met.

𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐏

With my hands on the back of his neck and my tongue seeking his, his fingertips dance from my thigh under my top.

Only he managed to make me shiver everywhere in a few seconds with the help of his touch. Not through his ice-cold skin, no, only through him. In keeping with the mood, the cold raindrops hit my window pane. "Waiting." he whispered to me.

Not a second later it was pitch black in my room. The butterflies in my stomach just like Mika don't know when to stop, but I love it, never let it stop! His lips kissed every inch of my skin and whispered to me how divine my body was. His hands slide up my top until it finally brushes over my head. The first item of clothing is already on the floor. My legs were around his waist so he could pick me up and lay me on my bed. When he did that, his lips were still on my skin.

As I lay down comfortably, I watched his clothes land piece by piece on the floor. His belly is built like that of a Greek god and although it is dark the moon shines on him. One could have immediately thought it was a godsend. The boxer shorts were the only items of clothing that remained. While I was about to take off my pants, Mika took my hands and indicated that he could do it himself. When my pants peeled off my skin, he looked at my legs in admiration and immediately threw my pants on the floor. Now stand half-naked in front of my bed. The red cheeks on his cheeks were clearly visible. "Are we really supposed to pull this off?" I asked Mika and looked him in the eye. His lips approached my ear and he breathed softly, "Y / n, the question is not, we should, but we can. A human and a vampire, is that a good chemistry?"

"Why don't we want to find out?" I whispered and kissed his shoulder in time. Now he looked at me again, but with clearly red cheeks you could have thought he had a fever, but I can't blame him, because even when his ice-cold body is on top of mine, my body manages to have a hot temperature.

As our tongues played with each other again, our hands explored each other's bodies. While one hand pinches my buttocks, the other is right on my bra clasp.

Moaning slightly, I also pinched his buttocks and felt my muscles tense. A low gasp left his delicate lips, which made me even weaker. My temperature rises more and more with each of his touches.

I can not stand it anymore!

He knows very well that he has the upper hand!

When my bra, like the rest of the clothes, landed on the floor, his ice-cold hands brushed my arms up to my hips and brushed the last piece of clothing across the floor.

I was breathing hard down in my zone.

His hands were on each thigh so I couldn't pinch my legs together. Apart from the horniness, I could hardly move my legs because of his strength, you can not say that he is so strong. The horniness in me is going like crazy! With every breath Mika takes against my area, the butterflies in my stomach fly crazier.

When his tongue brushed my cervix for less than a second, I let out a gasp. Immediately afterwards he pressed his tongue against it and danced with it at the same time. That I'm getting wetter is not only clear to me, but also to Mika, when he was his tongue in my entrance, she explored every single inch inside.

Overwhelmed by shame and lust, I pressed one hand against my mouth so as not to make a noise from you, and the other on his white-blonde hair.

Every time his tongue penetrated deeper and he spread my thighs wider and wider, it honestly hurt, but I don't care about that at the moment because as good as he makes me feel no one is going to do it and I want it too nobody does it because I just want them. Because I just want Mika.

When I thought it couldn't get better, I was wrong. When he started sucking, I was done. My lustful moans got louder every time I sucked, but I do my best that nobody but Mika can hear it. When he freed his tongue from the entrance again, he stuck his middle and ring finger in the next second and didn't give me a second to get used to it. The speed of his fingers is unique!

No matter how much I press my hand against my mouth, my moans stay louder.

Several times his name groaned, which only drove him to increase the speed. My orgasm is nourishing. When I groaned and said I was about to be there, he didn't stop but continued. His tongue dances on my cervix and his fingers successfully hit the G-spot every time, it's just breathtaking!

When my orgasm came, I screamed his name with relish and breathed heavily as I stared at the ceiling.

His beautiful face approached mine, but he devoted his lips to my ears and whispered, "A second round won't hurt you." Aren't my trembling legs enough for him? In the middle of the kiss, I slowly felt his member inside me, but my nails clawed behind his back in pain, we continued the kiss. Now it was Mika who groaned in the middle of the kiss. He closed his eyes and kissed my chest as his hips began to dance. Is it still normal for him to make me feel this way? Because on the one hand I can no longer, on the other hand I want more! Mika's one hand is on my thigh while the other is on my chest. The way he plays sensitive nipples is superb.

I don't know how he makes me feel so good, but I want him to never stop. "Mika, don't stop." I moaned in his ear and wrapped my legs around his waist. When he saw me, I didn't know how to feel. Because his eyes are blood red! He slowly approached my neck. That cold breath worried me even more. He didn't bite me, however, but instead scratched his designated spot with his fangs as the blood flowed from the wound, so it propelled him and made him much faster than before. The clap of our skin was just as loud as the satisfying moans from our mouths. "Y / n." he groaned my name and immediately turned me around. Now my back was visible to him. With both hands on our hips, our bodies clapped together. When I moaned his name one last time, the orgasm came, Mika pulled his member out of me and rubbed it with his hand until finally the white sperm speared out of his body.

𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐏

After Mika helped me cleanse my body, we are back in bed naked. "Do you think we can do it?" Mika asked out of nowhere. “I don't think so, I know, Mika. And I think you should too. "The vampire looked at me lovingly and finally kissed me on the lips and immediately afterwards whispered" Good night, y / n. " "Good night, Mika."

[levisgirll]

Hello! Can you please do a Levi headcanon/scenario where he hurts his crush's feelings and makes her cry but later regrets it and tries to apologise to her? Thanks!

𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨 (𝙇𝙚𝙫𝙞 𝘼𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙭 𝙁𝙚𝙢!𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧)

➡text: Hello there!! And omg of course I would be happy to write this out 🥺 the fact that to see levi apologize or own up to his mistakes is something that I would like to even write about- so thank you for this request! I hope you love it anon ♥ (incoming some fluff and you wont regret it!)

synopsis:  it was a long tiring day and with under pressure levi ackerman had, he accidently said something to y/n (his crush!) which hurt her feelings. levi feels terrible and to make it up for it, made y/n realize that levi and her might share the same feelings for each other.

fluff, angst, aot world, imagine fanfiction ♡ —

It was a long stressful day at the Survey crops headquarters building, and Captain Levi was assigned with many paper work to get done with.

The last expedition made Levi worry quite a lot for Y/N and her safety. Sure she was skilled, and a fast thinker but that still did not stop Levi from worrying about her. It was because he was the captain he had to worry about his squad....right?

But after Y/N getting hurt on the last expedition because she is kind of ‘reckless’ to what Levi thinks and used as an excuse, his heart sank and he then realized not only did he care about her too much, but he also developed feelings for her and with time it grew. Just her presence, the way she was, caring, friendly, confident, her natural beauty and a badass made him fall for her more.

But ever since on that day, he blamed himself for her getting injured because she was on his squad team.

The upcoming expedition was next month and he was becoming even more stressed and load with paperwork because it was a bigger mission this time they never had. Y/N obviously noticed that so after having a chat with Hanji she went by to his office and entered inside. They become more comfortable with each other so she was pleased to enter his office whenever she wanted to.

“Hi Levi, how are you?” she said with a bright smile, trying to light up the mood that was surrounding in his office.

“What do you think sherlock?” He spoke in a sarcastic tone and then let out a deep sigh. “O-Oh, Um I was wondering if you would like some help with the paperwork? I am free the whole day.” Her kind gestures always somehow warmed his heart, he liked the fact how in her free time she would always visit Levi and try her best to help him. But tonight was different, it was too much pressure loaded on him, he was not thinking straight.

He didn't respond to her offer and instead he got up from his seat behind the desk and gave her a piece of paper. “Read.” Was what he only said.

You took the paper from him and noticed....you were removed him Levi’s squad! “W-What....why.” You said so quietly but it had a very unhappy tone.

“You know why. You are too reckless, and I don't want that in my squad.” He lied and looked away, it was not because of your recklessness and never was because you were brave and perceptive. But in fact, it was because he wanted to keep you safe and away from harm because this time his squad was placed on the front and he moved you all the way on the back where it was safer. He does not want to lose you.

“I-I don't understand Levi...I though you trusted me-”

“Yea I don't trust you, and I clearly don't have time for you either.” You couldn't believe what he was saying to you, this behavior was out of nowhere and it made absolutely no sense! But, he was your source of motivation and inspiration and when he said that to you, it shattered your heart to pieces. You thought he had faith and trust in you and that's why he added you to his squad, you thought....you were important to him. Well, was important.

“Levi, please this makes no sense. At least explain to me why!” You yelled out, demanding an explanation for what the hell was evening going on.

“Don't argue with me.” He now gave you one of his hateful glares, and you know in a million years you would never be getting that from him, you were completely taken aback now. “Leave now! That’s an order L/N”.

You eyes were widen now, and your eyes were slowly starting to tear up. These words, completely damaged you and your feelings, he even called you by your last name which he never does. You never felt so hurt and your stomach sank which left you static and....heartbroken. Hearing this is a ego-killer for you. The paper you held slowly fell off from your hand, and you brought your hand up to cover your eyes and started to softly sob.

He noticed that quickly, and he wanted to come and comfort you but before he could do that you stormed off, slamming his door, y/n never wanting to see his face again.

Levi took a moment to process everything and then realized he had actually messed up everything. Both of you were so close and the bond and moments you both shared, Levi cherished that deeply. But, he ruined everything, shattered the bond, and now actually ironically losing you. He clenched his fist and closed his eyes tightly, “Fuck...The fuck is wrong with me?! Why am I so damn emotional.” And it was a fact, he was that when he bottled everything up and then let out his steam saying some bullshit.

It was days, and he didn’t even see or hear about Y/N. He did not get any sleep, staying up, overthinking his stupid mistake and regretting this all. His gilt, anger towards himself and grief started to grow by each day, hating himself how he hurt the person he had a crush on and someone he adored a lot which then lead to him thinking how to come to you with his true and deepest apology.

He tried to catch any chance to get you whenever you are alone and say apologize, but whenever he saw you, you would just jolt and try to run away and leave the place.

He then noticed from Hanji and the other scouts such as Armin and Mikasa that you were clearly avoiding Levi. He caught you by chance one evening as you were sitting down in the mass hall eating your sandwich alone so cutely and he just missed seeing that sight whenever you both had breaks and he would watch you eat cheerfully but....you were so down, that spirt was gone.

He was approaching you, and you then noticed that and felt your stomach sink, ‘Is he coming to me? Wait...he is, it’s only me here!’ You thought in your mind, panicking and not knowing what to do.

”Good evening.” He uttered, but you noticed there was some nervousness in that tone.

You did not look up at him and you left your sandwich that was half eaten on the plate, and got up. You lost your appetite, and you proceed to leave the mass hall, but you stopped in your steps when you heard Levi yell out. “No...d-don’t go. Please just stay for a bit.” The way he said it, was under such pain and he it sounded as if he was begging you. He really struggled doing this, but he would do it regardless if it was just to speak to you again for a bit.

He caught up to you, and took your wrist while his thumb was caressing your skin. You were still looking down, not wanting to see his face because you knew if you did now, you would tear up again.

“Can we talk please?” He said really quietly, and if the mass hall was not empty you wouldn't be able to grasp what he had said. Levi was clearly tensed and not sure if what he was doing is right, he never done this before, apologizing and talking about his feelings. But he would only, and only do this for the person he loved. Y/N.

“What do you want?” it came out more coldly then you expected and that made him hesitate. He remembered the image of your expression and you sobbing that day and it is still graved in his mind. He cant seem to get it out his head and he wanted to hear your forgiveness so it could go away.

“I fucked up, I know. But fuck, I...miss you.” He finally said, in a nervous and stuttering tone. He now moved his hand from your wrist to your soft and cold hands, and you could feel his warmth, warming your hand.

He brought up his other free hand and placed his palm on his forehead. Clearly this was hard for him and he felt such a jerk and an idiot cause all his words is now gone and he wasn’t sure how to say how apologetic he was and how you meant the world to him really.

But he know thought, How could he do this to someone who regularly checked on him, cared for him and also actually saw him as a normal person unlike the other scouts who thought he was heartless and just labeled as ‘strongest solider’. Y/N was the only who truly cared for his wellbeing and he admired that a lot. “Hey....I’m sorry. Everything I said wasn’t right. T-To be honest it was your bravery that made me fall for you...and care a lot more about you. So, please tell me What should I do to make it up for you?”

This caused you to finally look up to him and staring at his grey eyes, and after such a long time you were able to see his face clearly and close up which never fails to make your heart skip a beat. You stared at him for quite awhile, kind of surprised to what he said and the fact he was holding your hand meant a lot. But Levi took this as you still not wanting to talk to him, he wanted to say more and better things but he was quite bad formulating any more cause it him nervous and afraid to say something else to upset you further. He really did care about your feelings. “I won’t go....till I hear your answer. I waited long enough.”

You spoke, and after a long time hearing your voice this nearly made him tear up and that was because you were a big part of his life. “I can’t stay mad at you forever, so I forgive you. But, you hurted me and I cant forget that easily. But for now, Just....hold me.” You went near him and now placed both of your hands on his chest. He did not waste any second and pulled you in for a hug. It was probably his first time hugging you like this and he never knew it would make him have this fuzzy and sweet feeling like this. Of course, he would hold on to your waist, arm and shoulders sometimes during battle or when you needed some support to get up and move. But this was different, and he questioned himself how he never considered that.

Y/N and Levi both finally made up with each other, and he was really grateful for that and even the fact you forgave someone like Levi, he felt really lucky.

Of course, it will take some time for you to accept his apology, but he wont give up just yet and he really makes an effort everyday, you guys took it slow and he is more than willing to wait for you ♥

As, regret and remorse can lead a person to feel sorrow, this can cause a sense of sorrow for hurting someone such as Levi’s crush, and even though it was bad, this lead to him finally confessing and saying his true apology if it weren’t for this. Time is a healing process after all.

Once you finally sat down with Levi and talked back (after the countless times he tried to initiate a conversation or start something such as cleaning together but never got much a reaction from you) and had a small conversation with him asking how was his day. This melted his heart and he actually felt really happy inside that you finally started to speak to him. He missed your company, your sweet voice, and....that smile.

You surprised him further when you gave him tea (because he gave you so many things to somehow make you smile) and his eyes lit up, Levi never felt so happy in the last few weeks. Then he knew, that you. y/n, was his light and source of happiness. He drank the tea slowly cherishing it.

wow okay this was kind of emotional then I excepted it to be, but I honestly see a scenario like this happening where levi struggles and tries his best to own up his mistake and apologize and he would only be like this if it was to his crush and someone he loved cause this man gets nervous <3 so please y/n, give him some more hugs, he might not seem to ask for any but he is deeply inside craving for it. It’s his best comfort as it is coming from you! Anyways, please leave a like or a reblog if you enjoyed this and I hope you liked this anon 💖

[bored-storyteller]

Okay, I can't find where this request went anymore, but I'm sure it existed (or I wouldn't have written this). I'm going to try to look again in the mail. Anyway, our boys (Vil, Azul, Leona) a little sad and the reader comforting them with hugs.

54- Twisted Wonderland, Vil, Azul, Leona x Reader

His life isn't that easy. Back straight, head up, be elegant, be polite, never show the weight that falls on your shoulders. This is Vil's life, nothing more, nothing less.

As beautiful as a marble statue, a precious object that can only be admired, not touched. Sometimes he himself forgets that he is human.

It's hard to never break down, it's hard to keep up appearances, and you make it more difficult. You, the most precious thing he has.

He should feel free with you, right? Isn't that the cliché of every love story? But he can't really know, he's always the bad guy in stories.

So even with you it is the appearance that counts him, because you love him for that, right? It's not like there's much more to him than just his appearance - and apparently not even that is enough to give him any real value.

He is tired, that's why he has such negative thoughts. A restful sleep and the next day it will be a fragrant flower again, but it is still early to go to sleep.

"Vil?" Your angelic voice rouses him. You are there, stuck a few steps behind him, you look at him doubtfully and his heart trembles. Oh, did you notice too much wrinkle in his expression?

"Vil." You call his name again, and he is already preparing to tell you how tiring his day has been to clear the doubts that are likely creeping into you.

Vil is not someone used to being touched, he is a precious work of art after all, yet he is convinced that even a caress from you could at that moment bring him relief. But he has to keep up appearances.

"My dear?" His questioning smile tries not to be too guilty under your worried eyes that scrutinize him.

After a few seconds of silence, you are moving. You are slow, yet fast. Your arms slide gently under his, and your body tightens to his chest. Your warmth invades him as your face seeks refuge under his chin, lovingly rubbing your nose against his neck.

"It's cold ..." You murmur, and this is the justification you use, but he knows that you have only read inside him, and you have simply taken some of his weight for you.

"You smell good." You continue, while his arms hold you slowly, in a silent request for affection.

“Oh yeah… it's a new perfume you know? I thought…"

"Yes, that perfume is good too, but you also smell of something else."

He just walks away, so that his purple eyes can look for the answer in yours for that doubt you have posed to him. There is no need for him to ask, he knows that you will give him the answer.

"The scent of Vil." Your cheerful and affectionate smile erases all poison from his heart, and he smiles at you as he does not smile at anyone else as he silently welcomes you back against him.

Who knows, maybe with you appearances are completely useless.

 

A faint sigh comes from the dorm leader's lips to confide only in the air the pressure he is feeling inside him.

He is an excellent trader, a businessman, an excellent speaker and a perfect gentleman. Is not enough. He is never enough, and he probably never will be.

Sometimes the slander and contempt of many also burn him. Not everyone looks favorably on him, Azul knows, it's the price he himself chose to pay - at least he got something in return, right?

He isn't sure. Days like this, flat and heavy, occasionally bring back the most latent insecurities of him. Not that he shows it, only his eyes barely reflect the weight in his heart if you look at them carefully.

You are a relief, usually. Like every day he waits for you to come and greet him, but more than every day he would like to drop everything else, take you in his arms and hold you there. Yet despite his appearances he is still so shy. Sometimes even your gaze makes him blush, you know it, and you also know how much he cares about his figure and his representation in front of others, so you never take a step too far towards him, and he never has the courage to ask.

"Azul?"

Your voice finally reaches his ears, your bright eyes peeking through the crack of the half-open door before you allow yourself to enter.

"Oh, here you are ... give me a second, I'm almost done." His voice is as firm and calm as ever. He doesn't look at you, it's not strange, but the way he bows his head to avoid you sends you strange meanings.

He doesn't have the courage to look at you, the need he has for you makes him feel ashamed. A child who needs pampering, that's what he is at that moment. A nullity in front of you.

He feels you close, you are next to his chair, standing, looking at him. You don't move away, and he understands that you want his attention, he won't be able to ignore you for long.

"Do you need something?" He finally asks you, and his eyes force them to lift to your face, and he is surprised when he sees you smiling.

You just stare at him for a few moments, without giving him an answer, and then suddenly your arms are around his shoulders, his cheek gently resting on your shoulder.

"I missed you, Azul!" Your light but cheerful voice caresses his ear, while you hug him protectively, full of affection.

"We only met last night ..." he murmurs, in a tone that wanders between wonder and relief.

“I know, but I don't care. I missed you." You confirm again, as you make your way into his lap and let him hold you.

Your weight on him is reassuring, your touch and your presence welcoming.

"I can't hide anything from you, right?" He whispers in your ear, as if he is afraid of being heard by others, even if only the two of you exist in the room.

"No, I would say no." You mutter satisfied, snuggling up to him.

 

Usually he is so good at silencing that part of him, but when that black feeling arises it feels like a living being inside him struggling to get out and leave him weak, empty, mocked. He always swallows it, never allows it to peek out. Sometimes it curls up in the stomach, other times in the lungs, or gets stuck in his ribcage making his heart heavy, almost blocking his breath.

Leona is good at silencing those wounds to his pride, but sometimes it happens that a gesture, a laugh, a word at the wrong time weaken his defenses, taking him away from the already heavy looks of others.

In the greenhouse he is alone with himself. No, he's not there to sleep, he just needs to calm down. For some reason today it is difficult, more than usual. The weight in his chest causes him to hunch over, head bowed, ears down. His hands are left in his lap as he sits hidden among the plants, he almost seems to be meditating. Calm down, calm down, calm your anger. It is what he repeats to himself like a mantra as he listens to his own breath. Nobody can beat you, nobody can hurt you.

No, no one is going to hurt him - no one thinks he's worth hurting, do they? All that he is, all that he knows he is worth, is always trampled on, torn to pieces, thrown away by others, as if it were of no use.

"Caught!"

Your weight is never too violent against his sturdy back, but his surprise causes him to lean forward slightly.

You laugh as your hands gently tighten around his neck, and he growls.

"Idiot! Are you crazy ?! " His words are acidic, but by now you've got used to it. You are the only one who can ever afford to do such a thing with him, you are the only one he can forgive.

He doesn't realize it right away, but that little leap to his heart you gave him has suddenly lightened his mind. He only knows when your arms go away from him.

Wait, stay still.

That thought unexpectedly reaches his mind, but he is quickly kicked out. He won't beg for mercy, not even from you, especially with you.

Still, even if he doesn't speak, your weight doesn't stray too far. Your arms now slowly encircle his stomach as you drop relaxed on his back, like a lion cub on his father's back.

With your head resting behind his ribcage, Leona knows you're listening to his heartbeat. He knows this because he is listening to you too, he listens to your breath which naturally coordinates with the muscle moving slow and powerful in his chest. And then he understands that you understand his need that he pretends not to have.

"You are so strong, Leona."

And that's enough.

A light sigh caresses his lips: "Of course I'm strong, otherwise you-"

"I'd be fine!" You defend yourself, knowing full well where he wants to hit.

You don't see him, but a proud smile is painted on his face as he continues on his way: "Otherwise you would have already been eaten by now."

[kakaxhi]

Dabi | I Need You

Pairing: Dabi x F!Reader Warnings: language, angst (with a happy ending!) Request:

Word Count: 1.6k A/N: first time writing for Dabi! Which is odd considering he's one of my favorites. Anyways! Hope you enjoy! (Also, I couldn't think of anything other then him using his Quirk so excuse my unoriginality)

Tension was thick as Dabi walked back into the League's hideout after a mission gone wrong. He, along with Twice and Toga, went out to recruit some new members for the League when some heroes showed up at the last minute. He ended up with a few cuts on his forehead and on the unburnt skin on his chest, but mostly a bruised ego.

You let out a quiet gasp when you saw him. Even if you knew how well he could fight, you hated seeing your boyfriend in any sort of pain. Rushing over to him, placed a hand on his cheek, checking out his injuries as if they weren't minor.

"[Y/N], I'm fine. Would you stop?"

"I'm just checking on you, Dabi."

Dabi was growing more agitated as the minutes passed. Reputation with the League aside, he was already pissed off from earlier. His chose rose and fell with each deep breath he took.

"[Y/N], I'm not gonna ask again. Drop it, okay?"

Just as you were about to touch his cheek, his fingers tightly wrapped around your wrist. Cold, turquoise eyes met yours, and it honestly scared you. Dabi never acted this way towards you before but you knew how dangerous he could be.

"Dabi, let go."

"No, you're gonna listen to me."

"Please," you pushed at his chest, "you're hurting me."

"Like I care, I just drop so-"

He stopped when you let out a small whimper. Eyes slowly panned down to see his Quirk had activated, leaving small burn marks where his fingertips were. He was thankful they weren't severe, but you'd be in pain for a bit and he hated that he was the cause.

"[Y/N], sweetheart-"

"Get away from me, Dabi."

"Baby, wait," he reached out for you, only stopping when you flinched away from his touch.

"Get away!"

Dabi's hand twitched at his sides, wanting to comfort you so badly. His heart sunk to his stomach when you next spoke, voice cracking as you tried to hold back tears.

"I was just trying to help you, I'm sorry."

Dabi watched with sad eyes as you ran out of the room.

-

That night, he started to go in your shared room when he thought back to what happened. He was sure you didn't want him around but he at least wanted to try to talk to you. He knocked on the door, only to be greeted with your angered facial expression.

"What do you want, Dabi?"

The way you said his name hurt him. You would say it with so much love but now it was spat with venom. He knew he didn't deserve to be forgiven - whether it be quickly or at all.

"I uh, I wanted to talk, but you don't seem like you want too. Um, can I just get some clean clothes? I'll leave you alone after that."

You opened the door enough to let him in. You stayed silent the entire time he was getting what he needed. You wanted to scream, yell, anything to make him stay. But nothing came out but a strangled cry after he slammed the door as he left.

-

A little over a week had passed since the incident with Dabi. The two of you have barely spoken and even then the most you've said to him was a very stern 'fuck off'.'

Dabi was set to go on another mission, this one a little more dangerous then recruiting new members. Whether you were pissed at him still or not, he had to talk to you. Making his way to the room, he swiftly knocked on the door.

"[Y/N], open up." His forehead rested against the door, "Please, open the door sweetheart."

You opened the door, and Dabi could see the fresh tear marks on your cheeks.

"What, Dabi?"

He crossed his arms over his chest, saddened when you backed away from his touch.

"I um, I'm leaving on another mission. Things could turn very ugly and I might not make it back. I just wanted to see you before I left. I know you hate me. The shit I did - and what I said to you - all of it was unacceptable. You know I'd never want to hurt you on purpose, but I ended up doing that anyways. I'm an asshole, I know, but if there's a chance I don't come back, I just wanted you to know I'm sorry."

"Dabi, I-"

He shook his head, "You don't have to say anything, [Y/N]. Just tell me if I come back we can talk."

You nodded, "When."

"Huh?"

"When you get back, we'll talk."

Dabi nodded, a small smile forming on his lips. The least he wanted to do was kiss you goodbye, but with the way things were between you right now, it wasn't a good idea. His eyes lingered on your lips before shaking the thoughts from his head. He finally got you speaking to him, he wasn't going to mess up again.

"I'll see you around, babe."

-

You barely left your room for the next week. Dabi didn't mention what he was doing on this mission, but you couldn't help but be worried for him. How was he? Was he even alive? You didn't want to think of the possibility that he was gone. Even if you were still pissed and hurt, you didn't want the man dead.

The door to your room opened after a light knock. Toga stuck her head in, giving you a little smile. You were happy to see her well, knowing she had gone on this mission with Dabi and Shigaraki.

"Hi! Dabi wants to know if he can come see you."

"Yeah, send him in. I'm glad you guys got back safe."

"Well, we're alive."

She left after that, Dabi coming in a few minutes later. You were relieved to see him mostly okay, a few cuts and bruises and a slight limp but he was okay.

"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes?"

You couldn't help but chuckle at his flirty tone, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks. He tossed his coat aside, moving a pillow out of the way.

"Can I?"

You nodded, making room for him on the bed. He sat besides you, elbows resting on his thighs as he clasped his hands together between his knees.

"There's so many things I wanna say to you, but I don't know where to start."

"You can start with telling me why you we're acting the way you were. I mean, I was only trying to help you. I didn't want to see you hurt, Dabi."

He nodded, "I know, and I'm sorry. Endeavor ended up being with those other heroes that showed up and that put me in an even worse mood. And now it sounds like I'm making excuses for what I did - I'm not - and fuck, I sound like an idiot."

As soon as his father's name left his mouth, everything made sense. While it didn't excuse what he did, you could understand why he was in such a foul mood.

"I don't know of all the things he did to you, Dabi, but I'm sure seeing him wasn't easy. I know how you feel towards him."

Dabi turned towards you, "It doesn't make what I did any better, [Y/N]. Just because those fuckers out there don't know anything about my past doesn't mean I couldn't have said something so you'd understand. God, I'm so fucking sorry."

You weren't sure of what to say at this point, Dabi being vulnerable like this wasn't something he always let you see. Instead of waiting for you to answer, he sat up. He held out a hand towards your sore arm, eyes pleading with your own.

"Can I touch you? Please? Let me see what I did."

You held your arm out towards him. Dabi held your hand against his cheek, turning his head to kiss the spots his fingertips burnt.

"Does it hurt?"

"Not anymore. It wasn't that deep so it healed up quicker."

He shook his head, running his finger gently over your hand, "Is there any way you could ever forgive me? I certainly don't deserve it, but I swear, I'll make it up to however I can if you let me. Please, [Y/N], I love you. I can't lose the one person I give a shit about."

You held his hand in yours, "I love you too, Dabi. Things are just going to take some time to get better."

He nodded, "Understandable."

He got up to leave, only stopping when you placed a hand on his arm. He looked back at you, a sliver of hope filling him as you spoke your next words.

"You can stay, if you want too."

He sat behind you, arms wrapping around you as he whispered how much he loved you - and how thankful he was you still wanted him around.

[anime-corner]

Unmiss You I Iwaizumi H.

A/N: So, I basically don’t know how it turned out like this... Not proud of this one though, kind of am? It’s honestly confusing. But hey, hope you like it!

Two A.M. At least that was the time that was shown on his phone. He couldn't remember how long since then. Or how it happened. He just knew that he fucked up.

The device rang in his hand, answering quickly, not bothering to check the caller I.D., hoping that it was you, "yeah?"

"Aww, Iwa-chan! That was quick! Did you miss me that much?" He scoffed, throwing the phone on his bed, the call on speaker as he laid back down, his arm draped over his eyes.

"What do you want, Oikawa?" He asked without the usual insult to the setter's name.

"Are you… still thinking about her?" The caller said, careful in his words, "Besides, it's what? Almost three? You're usually not up this early."

"Why do you care?" He huffed as he thought about it. He never did stay up late or woke up early unless it was to give Oikawa the support he needed. But this time it was different, he knew that, and that was because he was waiting for you.

"Geez, of course, I care! You're my best friend! And it's obvious that you're miserable without her." Oikawa could hear shuffling on the other end.

"What do I do then? She won't answer my calls o-or reply back to my messages." Iwaizumi held out a pillow, throwing it across the room in frustration, "Hell, I can't even get a glimpse of her without those crows stopping me!!"

"Maybe… She wants to move on?" It was silent for a few moments as he debated in his mind. Was she really?

"... I hope not. Because wouldn't it be unfair if… she gets to forget everything when all I want is to get her back?" He gripped onto his dark hair, tears threatening to spill, his firm look shattering to pieces, "She's all that I think about after that game. She's in my dreams, within my vision… I could even hear her at times but…"

"But what?" A heavy sigh left Iwaizumi's lips as he succumbed to his thoughts.

"You're right… Maybe, she doesn't want me back. I can't just rewind time to make it right. I can't go back to before I fell for her, to stop myself from meeting her and undo everything because I know that I'll just end up liking her. Loving her." It wasn't like him to act like this.

He was stubborn. He wouldn't stop at anything like a breakup. Instead, he'd do anything to get you back. But, with how he was right now, he doubts that he'd be able to. That's just what was running inside his head. Full of doubt and regret.

"It would have been easier that way…" Oikawa comments, giving out a sigh as well.

"Yeah, no shit. But like you said, maybe she wants to move on. And I just have to live with the fact that you can't easily unmiss a person you so badly miss." Iwaizumi let out a growl of annoyance, hearing noises from the other side of the screen,  "Oi Kusokawa, are you still listening!?!"

"Get up. Out of bed. I'll pick you up in thirty minutes." He had to blink a couple of times, trying to register the words of his friend.

"What do you mean you'll pick me up!? Oi, don't come over or I'll kick your ass!"

"Just do it, will you Hajime?" Iwaizumi mumbles incoherent words to himself, debating whether or not he should. In the end, he gives in.

"Whatever."

Forcing himself out of his bed, he dressed with what he thought was okay looking. A long sleeve grey shirt and ripped jeans, not bothering to look good for something Oikawa had planned for him. It was useless, he thought. A distraction was useless. A knock came as he opened it, the setter eyed his friend from top to bottom.

"You look like shit." Oikawa said as he went in, hands in his pockets.

"Yeah, thanks sherlock." He rolled his eyes, closing the door.

"What's with the outfit? Come on, I'll get you something else." The setter darted towards his room, opening the closet for something the dark-haired male to wear.

"Why are you here, Oikawa? I'm assuming you aren't here just to take my mind off of her." Iwaizumi questioned, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Actually, I asked (y/n) if she could just hear you out. She'll be meeting us at the park." Oikawa admitted, already preparing for the worse.

"YOU DID WHAT!? YOU IDIOT! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?" Hands wrapped around the collar of Oikawa's shirt, face dangerously close and seething with rage.

"Because you're both hurting! See for yourself!" He got out his phone, scrolling through the messages he and two of Karasuno's members had been exchanging, "Both Tobio-chan and that Small Fry has been sending me pictures of her during their practice and she's trying her best to cope, struggling just the same as you."

"Shut up Assikawa!! (y/n)... She doesn't want me back. If she did, we would have fixed our relationship by now." "I lost her because I messed up. And--" Oikawa threw a pair of jeans with an oversized dark blue denim jacket and a grey hoodie.

"Here. Wear this." It was also the same one he wore when they watched the game between Karasuno and Shiratorizawa, "That's what you wore on your first date, right?"

"I… yeah."

"Good. I'm sure she'd like it if you wore that instead. I'll give you ten minutes to freshen up." He left Iwaizumi to get ready, closing the door behind him, "Or at least, as much as you possibly can. Geez, I can't believe you're an emotional wreck!"

Was it okay? Was it okay to see you? Did you hate him? Or did you still care? Was there still a chance for the two of you to get back together? More questions than answers and honestly, he only wanted to know if you'd take him back again.

"Hey, are you really sure she'll be there?" He got out of his room, wearing the clothes Oikawa handed him.

"I'm sure but…" Looking at him up and down again, a smile on his lips. His usual cheerful and outwardly carefree expression was on his face, "Look at my Iwa-chan, all grown up and ready to get his girl back!"

"Shut up! This was your idea!"

"Huh? Does that mean you don't really plan on fixing all of this? Are you giving up?" Iwaizumi choked on nothing, that wasn't his intention. He wasn't giving up. He just didn't know how to.

"That's not…" He was struggling to get his words out.

"Just kidding, Iwa-chan~!" Oikawa received a hit behind the head, one of the usual violent punishments he would get from his best friend, "Gah! What'd you hit me for?!"

"Shut up!"

"Is your vocabulary only limited to that?"

"Shut up!"

The walk towards the meeting place was quiet. He was uneasy. What were you even expecting from him? A sorry? To beg for forgiveness? A hug perhaps? Because he'd be ready to give you anything and everything. Shit, he should have brought that scarf you made for him.

"Huh? She isn't here yet?" Oikawa looked around but you were nowhere to be found.

"I knew it. She hates me." The dark haired male crashed down on a nearby bench.

"Now, don't go all psychic on me Iwaizumi. I was only late." Standing up quickly as if he didn't drown in his sorrows sitting on that wooden seat.

"(y/n)!" The setter greeted, tackling you into a hug.

"Sorry Tooru, did I make you wait?" You asked, pulling away from his hold.

"Nope! We just got here. I had to make sure Iwa got all dressed up instead of coming here only in sweatpants. Or those nasty jeans I saw him wear when I got there." He shuddered when he felt Iwaizumi's glare hitting his back as he raised both of his hands, making his way to the sides, "Well, I'll be way over there before Iwa-chan hits me again!"

"So…" The both of you start, the male clearing his throat when you didn't open your mouth to speak.

"Uh, you go first." He gestured towards you as you shook your head.

"Tooru asked me to listen. Now, talk. I still have to help Kiyoko and Hitoka in handling the boys." Iwaizumi nodded, realizing what little time he had to explain.

"Right." He began, rubbing the back of his head, "Oikawa told me everything… that happened that day.

• • •

You have been meeting up with Oikawa for the past few days now. You planned on surprising him on your third anniversary and with his best friend's help, you knew he'd like it, especially if he and his team win against Shiratorizawa. Well, you want your team to win too, but can't choose which side you'd support so, you decided that whoever wins would avenge the other.

Aoba Johsai lost.

His team lost and you stood there at the balcony crying your tears out, both in frustration and happiness. The latter because of your team and the former for the loss. You excused yourself, looking for any of the third years in the team. And you happen to stumble upon Oikawa.

"Tooru!" You shouted, running towards the setter.

"(y/n)? Shouldn't you be with your team?" He asked, looking around for the crows. Or at least, his little rival other than Ushijima Wakatoshi.

"They'll understand why I left. But most importantly, how are the two of you? How's Hajime?" It was your turn to look for your boyfriend.

"I'm… not sure. Iwa-chan's probably with Mattsun and Makki. The others should be together." You nodded, grasping both of his hands in yours.

"I'm sorry for what happened, you were all really great! I promise we'll beat up Ushiwaka's ass for you two!" You declared, earning a chuckle from him.

"It's fine, (y/n)-chan." Oikawa ruffled your hair once you released his hands before remembering something, "Hey, why don't you give your present to him, I'm sure he'd like it especially when you've been at it for weeks. Isn't it your anniversary today? It'll help him a lot." You hugged the man in front of you, appreciating the help and support he has given you.

"I hope so. Ah well, thanks again for the help Tooru, I really appreciate it. I'm happy that Hajime has a friend like--" You were then cut off by a shout, your name echoing throughout the hall.

"(y/n)!!"

"Hajime! Great timing! I've got something--” You rushed towards him and was about to give him a hug when the look on his face made you stop.

“No. You don’t have to. I can see it perfectly clear.” Iwaizumi said as your brows furrowed.

“What do you mean?” You asked, glancing at the other two third-years behind him who only shrugged.

“What do I mean?! I should have known that you liked Oikawa from the start! We lost the game and the first person you went to find was him!? Unbelievable (y/n), unbelievable!” He bellowed, glaring at the two of you. His eyes were clouded with grief from losing and seeing you with his best friend triggered something he didn't want inside of him.

“W-what? That’s not true. Look, I just managed to bump into him and--” He cut you off again, his hands clenched tightly.

"Yeah okay, blame it on that!"

“Hey Iwaizumi, I think you should calm down a bit.” Hanamaki joined in, placing a hand on the shoulder of their vice-captain.

“Yeah, they were just talking. (y/n) was probably comforting him and asking for you.” Matsukawa added, getting ready to help his best friend if Iwaizumi ever decides to punch away his anger.

“Bullshit! I know what I saw! How do you explain those past few days huh?! I wanted to ask you out before the Interhigh and it so happened that I saw the two of you together. I ignored it because I trusted you!” He held back, not to get him and his team kicked out and bring shame to the school in his final year. Though it was painful, he knew he needed to get rid of it verbally, "If you wanted him then you should have said so from the start! I would have understood. So, I'm letting you go. That's what you want right? To be free from me?!"

"H-hey now, you don't mean that right? Why don't we take a seat a-and we'll talk this out, yeah?" You offered, walking towards him cautiously.

"Talk? You still want to talk?!! I'm done (y/n), okay!? Just leave me alone! I never want to see you ever again!" He lashes out, his emotions controlling every bit of his sanity.

“Idiot! You’re a total idiot!!” You screamed at him, closing your eyes in an attempt to stop the tears from falling. You don't want to let him see how weak he's making you, not in a situation like this.

“How did I become--!!”

“I asked Tooru to help me think up an idea for the gift I wanted to give you for our anniversary. He’s your best friend so I thought it was okay and that he’d be able to keep a secret. But surprise, surprise, you don’t like that kind of thing. You don’t need to be jealous of someone I don’t have feelings for! But hey, I guess you don’t trust me like you say you do!” Shuffling through your bag, you pushed an Aegean hued scarf with Olive colored horizontal lines near the fringe, “Here, take it. Burn it for all I care. We’re done.”

'Did she..? No wait, don't move. I'm sorry..' He thought, he couldn't voice the words out and even if he did, the damage was already done, 'Why can't I…? (y/n) please, let's talk…'

"Goodbye, Haji-- no, Iwaizumi-san…" Saying his last name added salt, tons of it, to the biggest wound ever inflicted on your heart. And on his too.

'I said don't go..! I can't reach you if you do. I can't feel myself, please don't go.' Again, the words wouldn't dare leave his mouth as he was also afraid that he'd say something wrong. He didn't dare blink, wanting to still see your figure within his vision, 'Let me see those hands again, I'll kiss it all better. Just don't leave me…'

"Oi, Oikawa!!" Suddenly he was on the floor with a bruised cheek and an angry setter in front of him, being held back by the other two they were with. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"I get it that you're like that towards me but (y/n) didn't do anything wrong! She asked me for what you wanted and this is the thanks she gets!?" His grip on his collar was tight as he was still able to get close to him despite being held down by two of their friends, "You saw those bandages on her hands right? Well, she made that scarf all by herself just for you! She did that despite knowing nothing about knitting!"

"I…" He started but, as if you were still there, the words he so wanted to stay retreated back down his throat.

"What!? You what, Iwaizumi!!?" Oikawa snapped, almost on the brink of insanity like how Iwaizumi was before you left, "Got anymore bad things to say about her!?!"

"Zip it, will you?! I know that she didn't do anything wrong! It's just my fucked up and tired self making all the excuses!" He looked down, burying his face in his hands.

"Y-you could still run after her. I'm sure she'd--" One of them said, patting his back.

"She won't. Six years and never did she go against her word once she's made up her mind. It'll take a shit load of convincing but, I doubt she'd want me back." He gave out a huff, walking away until his best friend stopped him.

"Then you've just got to be stubborn like usual and try your best." Oikawa spoke, pumping the depressed Iwaizumi up.

"Huh? Ah, y-yeah…"

• • •

"How long has it been since you last slept?" You asked him, caressing his cheeks with your thumb as he leaned into your touch.

"What?" He blinked a couple of times before sighing, "I slept, maybe for just a few hours before waking up again because every time I close my eyes, that face you gave me that day keeps coming back to me and…"

"And?" He didn't want to tell you but, this would be the chance that he couldn't take hold of on that day.

"And there's this stupid scene that keeps playing in my dreams, during that fight we had, you left and when I saw you again, you were so happy with someone else and that broke me." He wanted to cry but all he could do was ball his fists with his brows furrowed in anger. Anger towards himself and his stupid decisions, "My last words to you that day was to leave me alone. That I never wanted to see you again. But, I was wrong. I still want you here by my side. I still want to see you. I still want to hear your voice every morning after I wake up and every night before I sleep just like before."

"Iwaizumi…" You started but your words just went in one ear and out the other as he continued.

"What I'm saying is, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I fucked up. That my jealousy got in between the two of us. It was dumb of me and Oikawa's supposed to be the childish one." He chuckled bitterly, mostly to himself. Now that he spoke his mind, it was silly of him to feel that way. To feel, was it inferiority? "I guess I still wasn't used to being the one getting the attention instead of him who's always surrounded by fangirls everywhere. Or believe in the idea of someone who would actually love me and not use me just to get to him."

"Iwaizumi, never in my life was I attracted to him. You know that right? I told you this once before." He held both of your hands, placing the other on his cheek. It was as if he was touch deprived and wanted to make up for the times he was away from you.

"I know. It's just that… letting you go that day was the hardest thing I've ever done. I couldn't even stop you, I just stayed there. I tried, believe me, I tried but I couldn't. I wanted to make you stay. But losing my last game in high school and all my emotions were over the place that it took a toll on me." Iwaizumi admitted. Sighing for who knows how many times now.

"It's okay. I understand." He stared at you, confusion written all over his face.

"No, you don't! I'm not blaming this on my loss. I'm blaming this on myself, for doubting you. You've been loving me so right despite studying in different schools and all I did was hurt you! Days after we broke up, I've been feeding myself these useless reasons not to see you, telling myself that you're mad at me and that you don't need me anymore. I'm sorry. Please hate me…" He was crying, he didn't care anymore if anyone saw him so… vulnerable. You wiped it all away, a smile on your lips.

"Hajime." You started. It was the first time in weeks since he last heard you say his name, "I love you."

"W-what?" These words were the least he expected to come out of your mouth but, he wasn't complaining either.

"You heard me. I love you." You repeated before you giggled, "Sure yeah, you were totally an ass for not listening to me but it doesn't change the fact that I still love you. And I also heard from Tooru that you haven't been like yourself since that day, my fault entirely. I should have thought about what your reaction would be.

"You know… I tried to come up with tons of reasons to just give up, so we both wouldn't have to hurt like this. It would have been easier for both of us. But, I can't. I don't want things to be easy between us. Everything you do makes me fall for you over and over, deeper than the last time. And hearing you say that you still love me, makes me realize that I should have tried even harder." Iwaizumi hugged you tightly, afraid that this was all a dream and was about to wake up. Or was he going soft just for you? Because it was obviously not because of Oikawa.

"So, what do you want to happen to us? What's your call?" You asked looking up at him.

“What’s this? Are you two okay now?” The childish devil on Iwaizumi's shoulder popped in between the two of you, “You are! That’s great! I’ll tell them right now--!”

“You, hanger bastard! I’ll beat you up--” He was about to give Oikawa a piece of his mind when he heard your voice echo in his ear.

“Hanger bastard? What’s with the new insult?” You laughed out loud, the wing spiker smiled, missing the sound, "Where'd you get that?"

"I'll tell you tomorrow, I'm sure Mattsun and Makki want to get a say in this too." He suggested, receiving a nod from you.

"Hey Iwa-chan, you guys don't have to diss me every time you get jealous!!" Iwaizumi scoffed, ignoring the setter.

"Anyways, I'll fetch and take you home after practice. We've got a lot of catching up to do." He offered, intertwining both of your fingers together, “We can even start now, I’ll walk you to Karasuno.”

"I'd like that, Hajime."

I gave you my heart and I don't regret not taking it back. My attention is yours and no one else's from the beginning until the end. 

[thehollowprince]

CONTEXT IS EVERYTHING

I got a reblog from one of the people that really dislike Scott McCall on one of my asks today. Like, an actual reblog and not just another anon chasing their tail in circles trying to convince me, themselves and the rest of the world that Scott was truly just Bad™. I was super surprised because that usually doesn't happen until after their leaders Athena and Cole give them the signal, but in the same breath I wasnt surprised because they had me blocked so that I couldn't reply. Par for the course, I guess, but I managed to snag screencaps of the reply and I'm here to just... go through them.

My favorite part of this is that they seemed to have been under the impression that my answer to that anon was a challenge of some kind.

For anyone interested, this was all in response to this ask that I answered yesterday. I went through and debunked all of their points and that's what I'm going to do again with this.

1: are we referring to the first season when they broke up after Night School because Scott "abandoned" them to save their lives from Peter? Because, yes, Scott did send her texts and a picture of them when they were together, and she got upset, and after explaining things, guess what, he did, in fact, leave her alone!

2: I've already talked about Scott's interaction with Isaac in Anchors ad nauseam, which can be read here and here. If anyone doesn't want to read the second one (I admit, I can get a little long-winded), what I said was that I didn't like that scene because of how out-of-character it was for Scott. As for Jackson, with the way he treated people, Scott in particular, I'm honestly surprised that no one beat him before that. Scott has the patience of a saint to deal with that for as long as he did without snapping.

3: what's really weird about this is how these people who really dislike Scott (and just by how that was phrased I think I finally found the anon) always fixate on that time Scott shoved Isaac. Just that one moment, and you know why, because their were no moments after that. Scott had no objections to Allison and Isaac hooking up (they never got around to actually dating).

4: this is one of those moments where I want to shake people and say "please watch the damn show!", because what this dingus left out, like everything else in their reply, was context (more on that in a minute). In that scene where Scott yells at Allison (Raving), its after their plan starts to fall apart. That's one of Scott's legitimate flaws in the show (conveniently overlooked in favor of fictional flaws). When things don't go according to plan, he gets frazzled and upset. It's why he and Stiles work so well together, because Stiles excelled at the spur-of-the-moment stuff. Their plan to capture Jackson (to save his life) and discover who his master was wasnt going according to plan. As a matter of fact, it went completely belly up, and a lot of people were in danger. Forgive me if I give a scared sixteen-year-old some leeway in that situation.

6: this is another instance where you just know that they either haven't watched the show, or they've seen the episode once (probably when it aired) and have never gone back to watch it again, relying solely on their Tumblr community to reaffirm their stance on the situation. What this person failed to include, was that the hunters were already hunting Isaac and Erica and Boyd. They were after Derek's pack since the moment Gerard came to town and declared war on all werewolves, whether they were involved in Kate's death or not (Omega). No thought as t all is given to why Isaac, Erica and Boyd were even in that situation to begin with. Why did Derek involve children in his issues?

What this person is also leaving out is that Scott and Allison didn't get to talk about what happened to her mother at the rave until season three. After she killed herself, she was manipulated by Gerard into actively hunting Derek's pack, and basically told Scott to leave her alone while she contemplated murder.

But once again, we have that double standard rearing its ugly head. Why is Scott supposed to tell everyone everything, but the same doesn't apply to characters like Derek or Stiles? Why didn't Derek tell Scott about his history with the Argents and why he hated them so much? Why didn't Stiles tell Scott about Donovan's or Josh's deaths or Theo's involvement? Why is that the fandom allows themselves to empathize with how these characters are feeling, with allowing them to be emotional in their decisions, but not the lead?

This is where context becomes incredibly important, because without context, we get people making blanket statements about a character in order to paint them in a bad light. Without context, I could make statements like "Stiles is a murderer for killing Donovan" or "Stiles nearly killed a police station full of people" or "Lydia was in league with Peter to bring him back from the dead". Those statements by themselves don't put those characters in a good light, do they? But once you add the context to those situations, it changes the entire perspective of things.

With context, I know that Stiles didn't murder Donovan, but that it was an accident that happened in a life-or-death situation. With context, I know that it wasnt Stiles that planted those explosives, but the Nogitsune possessing him. With context, I know that it was Peter's hijacking of Lydia's mind and untapped power that allowed him to rise from the dead. We're allowed to remember the context of these situations, but why not ever when it concerns Scott and his hardships? Another good example is painting Scott as an idiot because he had bad grades, while completely ignoring the circumstances around his life that led to his grades slipping, namely the werewolf shenanigans he was getting dragged into. The double-standard comes in when a legion of fans come to Stiles' defense for writing an essay on the history of circumcision for an Economics class, because "he has ADD/ADHD" all over one throwaway line about him taking Adderall.

Context is everything, and it's amazing how often it's completely ignored when it comes to Scott.

Two more points.

Sadly, this isn't just something specific to the Teen Wolf fandom. Fandom in general seem to think that romance is the final evolution of any kind of relationship. It says something about them that that's where they're putting the emphasis on Scott's and Allison's relationship, and not the fact that they found their way back to being friends after everything that happened between them in season two.

And then there's this gem.

Wait... what?

I am so confused by this, because I'm not talking about a character I hate, but rather defending one I actually live against a campaign of misinformation. They use the word irony, but I don't think it means what they think it does (this isn't the Alanis Morrisette song).

Final thoughts: I often find myself wondering why I even humor these people anymore because it doesn't matter what I say, or what evidence I produce, they're just going to go out of their way to twist everything into making it sound like I think Coolsville sucks. But I'm like a cockroach, I persist. It's going to take more than they can throw at me to make me stop calling out the racism and double-standards that permeate this fandom.

[cherry-ber]

Too drunk to fuck (pt 7)

Previous | Part one

If only you had known how bad of a day you were going to have, you would've lied and told your parents that you got a cold from last night, but of course, you didn't.

You woke up early, eager to meet Jaemin at school. You had a dream about going to a Cafe with him, so you were feeling a little positive. You got ready as usual and made time to prepare coffee and two sandwiches, planning on having lunch with him. You didn't know what it was, but Jaemin was making you so happy.

You asked your dad to drive you to school, and had a nice talk on the way. He asked about Mark, and thatvwas the only reason that you remembered his existence. You didn't mean to be mean, but he hadn't been nice to you, at all, so you just told dad that he had been busy since the day he saw him.

You arrived early, and wondered if he'd be at school already, by any chance.

“Monday, 7:20 a.m: morninnnnnnggggg!!!!!!

r u at school already 🤪

i wanted to have lunch with you

iF YOU WANT TO RITEEE”

Ten minutes happened and he didn't reply, so you just assumed that he was on his way. You walked towards your classroom and ran into Jeno, who seemed to be having a good morning, himself.

“Hey, sunshine” his smile was wide and bright, it made you smile too instantly.

“sunshine?” he nodded, and you both laughed it off “should I call you something cute, too?”

“Not if it doesn't come up natural” he asked to carry your bag and the bottle you had in your hands, you only gave him the bottle and you kept walking together “Anyway, have you talked to Jaemin? He hasn't replied to my texts since you left yesterday”

“No, i just texted him, but he hasn't even read them” a slight feeling of worry rushed through your spine, but you ignored it, thinking that you were just over thinking what happened yesterday.

“Well, i guess we'll have to wait” you arrived to your classroom and left your things in a chair. “Are you having lunch with us?”

“Sure, I'll see you later, then”

“Great, see you later, Sunshine”

Even though you were worried about Jaemin, it wasn't s bad day at all. You figured that maybe he just decided to skip the day if Mark annoyed him too much. You had a nice day with the boys again, you finally met Jisung and Chenle, and they were, indeed, babies. Jisung said that from now on you were officially the only girl allowed to be with them, and the rest of his friends laughed at how childish he was, but you thanked him and assured him that you were flattered. You couldn't remember the last time you had fun with boys like that, that had no other intention than to be friends.

In the last period, though, you got a text, and went to the restroom to read it.

“Monday, 1:46 p.m, Mark: I'll pick you up

Be on time

Please”

“Monday, 1:55 p.m: you're kidding”

“Monday, 2:06 p.m: we need to talk. i won't be late”

You were anxious. You were pissed at him, you were hurt and him acting like that, again, made you feel even worse. But knowing that you were meeting again, as so many times you had, still made you feel some type of way.

When the class was over, you rushed to his place in the parking lot, trying not to run into any of your friends or someone that would distract you. You waited for him, and know he was the one coming late. You thought that maybe it was time to get going, until you heard rhe roar of his Harley in the distance. He stopped and looked at you, not saying a word but telling you to hop in. You did, with ni helmet this time, in fact, he barely gave you enough time to sit properly and hold him, before rushing to wherever he wanted to go. You realized soon that he was taking you home. When you stopped and got off, you wanted to thank him for the ride, bug he took off his helmet and interrupted you.

“Are your parents home?” he had scars everywhere on his face, a black eye and deep dark circles. For a moment you felt guilty for being pissed.

“No. Do you wanna come in?” he nodded and you told him to park in the garage.

You sat on the dining table, and none of you dared to speak first.

“Are you hurted?” Dumb question, of course he was hurted. His lips were still bleeding when he'd smile , but he did anyway.

“A little” you couldn't look him in the eye and he noticed “Are you?”

“I didn't get beaten yesterday” you tried to laugh but you knew what he meant.

“I mean... Did I hurt your feelings?”

'yes' you wanted to scream at him, you didn't understand why, but you were so done with him for some reason 'what would you know about feelings anyway?'

“No, why would you?”

“I think i was a jerk yesterday. Not only to you, I was so selfish with my friends, I need to apologize, but I wanted to make sure you were okay” In his mind it made no sense, he knew he was wrong, but he didn't know what made him be wrong, not at all.

“Did you apologize to Jaemin already?” There it was. The sudden mention of his friend's name triggered some kind of jealous that he couldn't understand, but he couldn't stop.

“Talking that” he said in a more serious tone “What's going on between you and Jaemin?”

Well, you sure didn't know what to say. Mark was the one that you were "dating" somehow, and as much as he had been and idiot, you knew that you couldn't treat him like that. But Jaemin was so sweet, he also confessed already, which made things easier, because you didn't have to guess what he was feeling, unlike Mark. If anything, why did Mark care, anyway?

“Nothing at all, I guess” but the sensation of lying to him made you feel guilty, everything about being with him did, “well, we had fun yesterday, that's it”

He raised an eyebrow and got the feeling of something being wrong, but he wouldn't make it a bigger problem. “Sure”

The silence was overwhelming as both tried to think what to do next. He knew he wanted to grab you and kiss you, hoping you would forget about Jaemin, at least for a while. You started to make excuses for him to leave, without sounding rude at all.

“What kind of fun?” it came out of him unnoticed, and he regretted it as he was speaking.

“What?” it was unexpected, and turned on a switch made made your anger grow again, but you spoke calmly.

“I mean, do you ever say you have fun with me?” you were about to go off, you knew you were done but Mark was quick to continue “I'm- sorry, I just got... Confused? I'll just stop”

“Monday, 3:20 p.m, Na Jaemin: I'M SORRY

Okay so I don't want to make up excuses

I'm sorry, but you don't have to forgive me

Do you want to talk?

Should I leave you alone?”

You couldn't help but smile. The man in front of realized and the look on his face was intimidating again.

“Y/N” he got your attention again “please, just tell me if you feel something for... someone. I just need to know, please” his voice cracked a little and your only reaction was to hold his hand, he squeezed you back and waited for your answer, but you didn't know what it was. You were sure you had feelings for him, after all this was the main reason that whatever he did ended up hurting you, but at this point you didn't know what kind of feelings they were. You cared for him, you were thankful that he introduced you to his friends, you knew that you'd be there for him what ever he'd been through, and what ever he wanted, but was that what he wanted to hear?

“Do you?” you asked, but didn't know who you asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I don't know” you wished things never became complicated, and he did too.

“Jaemin likes you, do you know that?” he hoped you said you didn't, and that he'd scare you away from him, even knowing that his friend, who literally saved him last night, would be hurted.

“Yes” he started to let your hand go, and it didn't have to feel as dramatic as it did, but you couldn't help it “how do you know?”

“He told me. In fact-” he got visibly nervous “he told me some time ago”

It seemed like everytime you tried to excuse Mark he said something to be wrong again. You didn't want to discuss anything with him anymore, you didn't even know what ypu were thinking anymore.

“Can you tell me what happened yesterday?”

“I don't really want to talk about it” he looked tired, and you felt compassion for him “I will apologize to Jaemin, just so you know”

“It's what he deserves”

“He does” it was so awkward, it felt like during this days you grew apart so much “I'm sorry Y/N, I don't what I'm doing, I feel weird and lost, do you think he'll ever forgive me?”

“Mark... Of course he will, you are friends and he loves you”

“I don't want to make this about us again. I just wanted to clear up everything, I think it's confusing. There's nothing between us, right? You can do whatever you want, I don't want you to feel like you're tied to me... That's not me, I don't do that, you know it, right?”

You expected that. But it didn't change the fact that it hurted just so much.

“Yeah, I know” you didn't want him to notice, you knew that it wouldn't change anything “of course I know”

“Are you okay with that?”

“Of course I am”

Mark felt an urge to ask you to reconsider your relationship, he wondered if there was anything he could say to make you change your mind, but deep down, he knew that you wouldn't agree. That was the problem of not being honest from the beginning.

If he could go back in time, he would, and do whatever he could differently.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A.N: I'm uninspired and feeling down, but i didn't want to sink in my own thoughts, I hope you can enjoy this a little bit. Did you drink some water already?

[bobasheebaby]

100 Buffy Prompts

I had a lot of fun compiling this list. I was cracking up more than once and now I want to binge Buffy. If there is a show you want let me know because these seriously help me shut of my brain during this covid hell.

1 “NAME, your mouth is open, sound is coming from it. This is never good.” – Buffy Summers

2 “I just want to be alone and quite in a room with a chair and a fireplace and a tea cozy. I don’t even know what a tea cozy is, but I want one.” – Buffy Summers

3 "They were supposed to be my light at the end of the tunnel. I guess they were a train.” – Buffy Summers

4 “I don’t know what’s coming next. But I do know it’s gonna be just like this – hard, painful. But in the end, it’s gonna be us. If we all do our parts, believe it, we’ll be the one’s left standing.” – Buffy Summers

5 “I don’t handle rejection well. Funny, considering all the practice I’ve had, huh?” – Xander Harris

6 "Just because you’re better than us doesn’t mean you can be all superior.” – Xander Harris

7 “I’m leaning towards blind panic myself.” – Rupert Giles

8 “Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you’ll just have to pick it up yourself.” – Rupert Giles

9 "With all the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder that there's room for my brain." – Spike

10 "Oh, I don't know. Looking in the mirror every day and seeing nothing there...it's an overrated pleasure.” – Angel

11 "Passion. It lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir. Open it's jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us. Passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have?" – Angel

12 "Anyway, for real now, I'm gonna ask you something, and you gotta promise you'll be honest and not spare my feelings just 'cause I could kill you. You promise?" Faith

13 "You gotta give me something to do. There's no way I'm sleeping. Don't you need anyone dead? Or maimed? I can settle for maimed.” – Faith

14 "You know, I honestly don't think there's a human word fabulous enough for me.”- Glorificus

15 “I’m cookie dough. I’m not done baking. I’m not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I’m gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day, I turn around and realize I’m ready. I’m cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat m — or enjoy warm, delicious, cookie me, then that’s fine. That’ll be then. When I’m done.” — Buffy Summers

16 “Seize the moment, ’cause tomorrow you might be dead.” — Buffy Summers

17 “The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live.” — Buffy Summers

18 “No weapons. No friends. No hope. Take all that away and what’s left?” “Me.” — Angelus & Buffy Summers

19 “Don’t you have an elsewhere to be?” – Cordelia Chase

20 “God! What is your childhood trauma?!” – Cordelia Chase

21 “Gee, can you vague that up for me?” – Buffy Summers

22 “I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.” – Xander Harris

23 “I don’t know what your problem is, what your issues are. But as of this moment I officially don’t care.” – Xander Harris

24 “You’re really campaigning for bitch of the year, aren’t you?” – Cordelia Chase

25 “I mock you with my monkey pants!” – Oz

26 “Funny how preparing looks an awful lot like sitting on your ass.” – Spike

27 “That’s fairly freaksome.” – Oz

28 “Do you have any tact at all?” – Giles

29 “I’ve known you for two minutes and I can’t stand you.” – Spike

30 “Great. Now I’m gonna be stuck with serious thoughts all day.” – Cordelia Chase

31 “You didn’t happen to take a lot of drugs, did you?” – Willow

32 “I’ve seen honest faces…they usually come attached to liars.” – Willow

33 “Can I be blind, too?” – Xander

34 “Gee, I hope I’m not interrupting anything really depressing.” – Riley

35 “And you just accepted that? I only said that because I thought that’s what you wanted to hear.” – Anya

36 “This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.” – Spike

37 “We’ve got to face it, we’ve changed. Well, not you—you’re still sadistic and self-centered.” – Giles

38 “Sometimes the most adult thing you can do is ask for help when you need it.” – Giles

39 “Did everybody have their Crazy Flakes today?” – Xander

40 “Do you love me?” “What?” “Do you?” “I love you. I don't know if I trust you.” “Maybe you shouldn't do either.” “Maybe I'm the one who should decide!” — Angel & Buffy

41 “Six a.m.!" NAME cried. "I know that's a number on my clock, but I've never actually been awake to personally witness it!” — Xander

42 “Bored now.” — Vampire Willow

43 “We’ll go be heroes.” — Spike

44 “You have a plan?” “I am the plan.” — Giles & Buffy

45 "Strong is fighting. It's hard and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together." — Buffy

46 "I make it through this and the next thing and the next thing, and maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready." — Buffy

47 "You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. NAME, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live, for me." — Buffy

48 "Make your choices. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy

49 “Weird love’s better than no love.” — Buffy

50 “The who having wha with huh?” — Buffy

51 “Whatever you choose, you’ve got my support. Just think of me as… as your… You know, I’m searching for supportive things and I’m coming up all bras. So, something slightly more manly, think of me as that.” – Xander

52 "A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful, they can be painful." Angel

53 "To forgive is an act of compassion, NAME. It's-it's... it's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it." — Giles

54 "In the end, we all are who we are, no matter how much we may appear to have changed." — Giles

55 "I don't have time for vendettas. The mission is what matters." — Buffy

56 "I don't want to protect you from the world. I want to show it to you." — Buffy

57 "Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy

58 "Recognizing power in another does not diminish your own." — Joss Whedon

59 “Out. For. A. Walk… Bitch.” — Spike

60 “You can’t see the stars, love. That’s the ceiling. Also, it’s day.” — Spike

61 “Is everyone here very stoned?” — Spike

62 “I feel safe with you.” [Chokes] “TAKE THAT BACK!” — Dawn & Spike

63 “I love you.” “Oh, my god.” “Hey, no. Look at me. I... love you. You're all I bloody think about... dream about. You're in my gut... my throat... I'm drowning in you, NAME. I'm drowning in you.” — Spike & Buffy

64 “Just... give me something. A crumb, the barest smidgen. Tell me maybe, someday there's a chance” “NAME ... the only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious.” “Oh, wha-“ [screams, then shouts]  “What the bleeding hell is wrong with you bloody men/women? What the hell does it take? Why do you bitches torture me?” “Which question do you want me to answer first?” — Spike & Buffy

65 “You can't deny it. There's something between us.” “Loathing. Disgust.” — Spike & Buffy

66 “Could do without the laugh track, NAME.” “But it's so funny. I knew... before you did. I knew you loved the NAME. The pixies in my head whispered it to me.” — Spike & Drusilla

67 “Damn right I’m impure! I’m as impure as the driven yellow snow.” — Spike

68 “I love you.” “No, you don’t. But thanks for saying it.” — Spike & Buffy

69 “This with you, it’s wrong. I know it. I’m not a complete idiot.” — Spike

70 “You always hurt the ones you love, pet.” — Spike

71 "When I say ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are." — Buffy

72 "I’m just gonna go home, lie down, and listen to country music. The music of pain." — Buffy

73 "I have feelings for you. I do. But it's not love. I could never trust you enough for it to be love." — Buffy

74 "Weird love's better than no love." — Buffy

75 “People don’t fall in love with what’s right in front of them. People want the dream — what they can’t have. The more unattainable, the more attractive.” — Buffy

76 "Trust is for old marrieds, NAME. Great love is wild and passionate and dangerous. It burns and consumes." “Until there's nothing left. Love like that doesn't last." — Spike & Buffy

77 "This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you...you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after" — Angel

78 "I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop" — Angel

79 "If I may suggest, ‘This time it's personal.’ I mean, there's a reason why it's a classic." —Oz

80 "Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend NAME jealous, or even the score, or something. And...that's on the empty side. See, in my fantasy, when I'm kissing you, you're kissing me. It's okay, I can wait." — Oz

81 "NAME’s our friend...except I don't like him/her.” — Xander

82 "What am I gonna do? I think about sex all the time! Sex ... Help! Four times five is thirty ... five times six is thirty-two ... Naked girls. Naked women ... Naked NAME ... Oh, stop me!" — Xander

83 "Man, NAME! My whole life just flashed before my eyes. I gotta' get me a life!" — Xander

84 “NAME. You're really campaigning for bitch-of-the-year, aren't you?” “As defending champion, you nervous?” — Cordelia & Buffy

85 "Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass." — Cordelia

86 “Oh please. Like shame is something to be proud of.” — Cordelia

87 “I’m going to give you some advice: get over it.” — Cordelia

88 “Oh, and you’re welcome.” — Cordelia

89 “I’m not a sniveling little cry-NAME. I’m the nastiest guy/girl in PLACE history. I take crap from no one.” — Cordelia

90 “I think it. I say it. It’s my way.” — Cordelia

91 "I don't like spiders, okay? Their furry bodies, and their sticky webs, and what do they need all those legs for anyway? I'll tell you - for crawling across your face in the middle of the night." — Willow

92 "I don't want danger. Big 'no’ to danger.” — Willow

93 "Let's get this straight. I don't understand it. I don't wanna' understand it. You have gross emotional problems. And things are not okay between us." — Willow

94 "NAME, I got so lost." "I found you. I will always find you." — Tara & Willow

95 "But you like him/her, and when you think about him/her, you get that good down-low tickle, right?" — Faith

96 "You hurt me, I hurt you. I'm just a little more efficient." — Faith

97 "Just relax ... and take off your pants." — Faith

98 "I am, you know." “What?" “Yours." — Tara & Willow

99 "I don't have time for bondage fun." - Buffy

100 “It's fine, I don't need to be snuggled.” — Willow

[mister-lady]

geez, i love your writing so much. water totally does have a taste tho. otherwise when you went to other places besides your house you wouldn't think that the water tasted weird there!!! which i'm now realizing might just be a me thing lol. anyway! if it's okay to send another prompt (i don't wanna overwork you!) then howa bout 9 with Remus cuz you said you didn't like him at first and the prompt says "forced to spend time together"!!!

*sobs* th-thANK yoUu!!!! And exactly!!!! Water has a taste!!!!! Janus doesn't agree tho smh. I definelty get that tho! One of my friends house that I go to I cant have their water cause it tastes funky to me dkkvkskg.

AAA ILLYYYY🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘❤💘❤❤❤💘❤💘❤💘❤❤❤🌟❤❤❤❤❤❤💘💘💘💘🌟🌟🌟🌟you're not overworking me at all!!!!!!!! I'm absolutely loving all of these thank you sososoo muchhh🥺🥺🥺🥺👉👈👉👈👉👈👉👈👉😭👈👈😭😭😭🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺💘❤💕❤💕❤💕❤❤💕 this was super fun to do!!! Especially becuase I normally don't talk much about my enemies to lovers thing with Remus so it was kinda nice to almost project it onto here!!!🥰🥰🥰 Also sorry I got a little carried away while writing and it got a little off-topic from the prompt-

Prompt: A moves into a new apartment and wants to check out the closest dog park. Their dog loves it there, especially that one dog that seems to be there almost every time they go. With their dogs being madly in love with each other, A and the other owner, B, are forced to spend more time together as well

Warnings: strong curse words used a minor amount. Very small angst.

----------------------------

Matt had moved into an apartment, hoping to build up some money for a home. He was living the life though, being able to do things when he wanted, without people complaining at him. However, Matt had gotten a little lonely so he did the best solution! He got a pet. Now, Matt normally wasn't a fan of dogs, mainly ones that barked a lot, but when he had been searching through the animal shelter and found a very peaceful dog. It was maybe around 1 year old and it was a small poneramium. Normally small dogs barked a lot but this one was fairly quiet and Matt liked it for that. He named his dog Siskel. Since an apparment was a small place Matt had searched up local dog parks he could take his dog to and let it play for a bit and get some exercise. Matt was unbelievably happy when his dog had found another dog friend! He thought they were adorable together and seemed to get along so well too! What he hated was the rat-bastard that owned the dog. You know how theres the couple in movies that want be together but the parents hate eachother? It was essentially that for Matt, but it was one-sided. The other person seemed to find Matt amusing, even though Matt had often showed that he didn't care much for him. Sometimes Matt would feel bad for the way he treated the person, he never gave him a true chance. But then the person would say something that made Matt stop feeling as guilty. The downfall for Matt was that he had scheduled days that he could go to the park where he had free time so it's not like he could ignore the other guy either. Plus, he would feel bad for depriving his puppy of it's friend just because Matt had been salty.

Matt had currently been sitting on a bench at the dog park and was keeping a close eye on Siskel. He made sure to keep his dog on a leash incase it did go to do soemthing bad, he could pull it back, plus, he didn't have to worry about Siskel running off either. Matt could tell just by the way his dog acted, that it was impatiently waiting for it's friend to arrive. Matt was trying to take it's mind off of waiting for it's friend and was throwing a pinecone for his dog. He would use a toy but if another dog came up who knew wheres its mouth had been? Siskel knew not to fully bite on the pinecone, but it would still bark at it and pretend to play with it. Matt couldn't help but smile as he watched. Though, poor Matthew's smile didn't last for long as he felt the same ol' guy sit next to him. Matt knew a little information about him, like his name and such, but only because he had told him like Matt had asked.

"Hey, Maaattttt!!" He chimed.

"Hi, Remus" Matt huffed.

Matt watched as the dogs quickly ran up to eachother and played with a pinecone together. It was very wholesome. However Matt casted a confused glance towards Remus, not understanding why he was so silent.

"You're quiet." Matt commented, while raising an eyebrow.

"I am?" Remus asked, as if he wasn't aware of what Matt was talking about.

"Yeah, normally you're rambling on about something that happened to you, or about how you poisoned your enemies cake or soemthing." Matt soon regretted speaking up, as he watched a very amused smile grow across Remus's face.

Remus gave Matt a very tight hug, causing Matt to squeak from alarm. Matt couldn't help but notice now warm Remus had felt and he could feel the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.

"Wh-.. what?" Matt questioned.

"You do listen!!! I was always afraid you never listened to my stories!" Remus seemed to be bursting with excitement.

"Well, I mean I kinda have too, you tail me around against my will." Matt flatly pointed out.

"Pssshh, yeah cuase you don't like me. Totally"

"I hate you. And why are you still hugging me??"

Remus withdrew and let go of the hug. Matt could've sworn he thought Remus looked a little upset for a moment, but if he did it was quickly replaced by happiness.

"You knowwww... it took you a little while for you to tell me to stop hugging youuu" Remus teased.

"You're honestly the biggest idiot I know and it hurts to be around you."

"You can insult me all you want but it's not going to change the fact that you like my hugs!"

"You're a lunatic and burn down places. The last thing I want is your hugs."

"Is that why you let me hug you?"

"I didn't let you hug me! If I did I would've hugged back. But I didn't."

"You let me hug you and you listen to what I say? Mmmmm... I'm pretty sure you like me."

"I don't like you, I'm just that lonely."

"Most people that don't like me get a restraining order, so you must like me to some extent, right?" Remus gave Matt a puppy-eyed look.

Matt groaned in annoyance. "I just might if I have to sit here any longer."

"That's not a no~"

"And it's definitely not a yes."

"Well, it's not a no, so I'll take what I can get."

"You're a dunce."

"I still don't see why you hang out with me so much then."

"Hang?? Out?? I-? Me??- with yOu??-" Matt stumbled over his words in aghast. "Okay, I certainly don't, and would never, hang out with you, Remus. You come up to me. I deal with it because for some stupid reason my dog likes your dog, and I do what's good for my dog because I have a little bit of common sense."

Remus pouted at Matt's little tangent and crossed his arms. "Fine. I won't talk with you then. Maybe then you'll like me more."

Matt shook his head, "Why do you care so much for whether I like you or not?"

Remus only glared at him and didn't respond. Matt decided to take the opportunity of peace and quiet, however, as time started to pass, he felt like something was bugging him. Like he was itching to do soemthing and he didn't know what. Like something was...off. He gave Remus a curious glance, wondering if he had done something, but by the looks of it he was behaving like a decent human being. If that was the case, then what was bugging Matt?? He had gotten what he wished for, had he not? He subconsciously gave Remus an almost longing kind of look, and Remus met his gaze for a split second, only to look away. Matt couldn't help but fear a pang of hurt in his heart, only to be quickly filled with frustration at himself. Remus complete was the opposite of a normal, decent, and civilized person. All he did was annoy Matt, so why did Matt feel bad? He quickly answered his own question. Remus hadn't done anything bad directly towards Matt, and Matt had acted like a huge douche towards him for no reason. Matt felt his eyes water up a bit at the realization and quickly blinked it away. He felt terrible for the way he had acted.

"I'm sorry." Matt spoke, his voice cracking a little bit causing him to inwardly cringe.

Remus looked at him, but gave him a questioning look as if asking him to go on.

"I'm sorry for being a massive and terrible douche towards you. You hadn't done anything wrong, if anything, out of all the things you've told me about I should be lucky that you didn't do anything to me and I'm really, really, sorry and I know that doesn't really change anything but I completely understand if you don't forgive me, and honestly with the way I've treated you I probably don't deserve your forgiveness." Matt had gotten repeatedly choked up as he spoke and had to keep clearing his throat or blinking away the water in his eyes in a sad attempt to hide what he was feeling.

Remus eyes had widened in surprise. That was by far not what he had expected at all. He didn't expect too much of an appology especially from Matt, so the heart felt appology took him a few seconds to process.

"..Matt?" Remus spoke.

"Yea?"

"Can I hug you?"

Matt quickly nodded his head and felt his face twist as he felt a few tears go down his face agaisnt his will. He didn't realize all the weird feelings he had subconsciously bottled up, but as Remus tackled him into a hug, almost knocking him off the bench they had been sitting on, Matt couldn't help but sniffle a little bit. He felt the warmth from Remus engulf him again, and his mind drifted to how nice Remus's arms and hands had felt to be wrapped around him. Matt tried to calm down his sudden emotions and breathed a little more slowly, and slowly slithered his arms up and around Remus's back and rested his head on his shoulder.

"We never speak of this to anyone." Matt mumbled.

Remus giggled and nodded his head in agreement, causing Matt to laugh a little bit himself.

"I knew you always liked me a little bit." Remus teased.

[youlooklikearealbabetoday]

I love your ke analysis. I don't know if someone already asked u this, but i wondered if you think that Eve, in some ways, is in love with Villanelle. And do you think that if they'll ever have sex, Villanelle will get bored and get over her?

*villanelle voice* EVEEE?! oh she is even though she can’t and won’t admit it in the most typical way but when are these two idiots ever typical. remember that eve is a woman who’s entire early-forties existence before v was implied as relatively predictable — “i basically married my dad.” while i have no doubt there’s always been a dark ribbon of hunger running through eve’s life that we haven’t been privy to fully comprehend yet that only just started to fully unearth itself, the sheer weight of these upheavals and changes that v served as catalyst is not something i can imagine one just accepting and admitting to in less than a few months time let alone it being wrapped and tied to a woman who is an international assassin, who everyone in eve’s life is telling her is incapable of feeling anything, who murdered her best friend and manipulated her into killing a man. phew. but they are inexorably tethered, for better or worse. listen to the differences in the two “no’s” she utters in relation to v telling eve she loves her (vehement) vs. saying eve is in love with her (softer, more unsure)…the delivery difference of those lines is quite stark, thank you queen sandra. not to mention how eve independently committed to v in deeper ways than we could’ve known in first watching that scene with carolyn in 2x08 — knowing what v was capable of in the face of standing up to her and embracing it nonetheless. it’s all so tragically romantic it makes my organs ache.

anon my brain litchurarlly melts thinking about v and eve having sex liiikke can you imagine just how intense their first time would be? the fusion of anger, frustration, desperation, passion, and sheer obstinance these two share …. i will say though that doesn’t mean i think that hours of mindblowing sex would magically resolve all of the obstacles in their way (though i’d like to see it shshshshhhhh) related to their own individual perceptions of what the other means to them and what they mean to the other. right now those lines have not intersected and while the sex would be beyoooond, ultimately it wouldn’t be enough if their intentions and expectations aren’t aligned. which brings me to the possibility of v getting bored of eve which — at this current point in time — i do think so, yes, she could eventually. however one thing i want to make clear is that her boredom would not be a direct effect of finally having sex with eve nor is it the same as getting over eve which would be impossible for v.

the reasons i think she could get bored of eve at this point in time is that because, as i mentioned before, part of her perception of eve is built upon a matchstick foundation of her idealization of normality. while v may crave for some version of it it ultimately is something she doesn’t completely understand what it entails to have and maintain and deep down will want in the long term. we also know she’s completely bored of a more supposed ‘free’ life where she can buy and travel and kill but still feels ‘nothing.’ i also don’t see eve being content with that existence, nor with her former one as much as she may try to fall back upon it. while we understandably think first and foremost about the possibilities of v getting bored of eve there’s also the very real possibility of eve getting bored of v, esp if we’re taking seriously villanelle’s ‘we are the same’ and viewing konstantin’s assessment of the hungry caterpillar as it relates to not only v but eve as well. from eve’s very introduction we got the sense of restlessness within her. how unsatisfied she seemed even in describing her earlier days in her first ‘interview’ with carolyn in the empty restaurant. similarly eve is in the process or already has systematically destroyed her close relationships, has manipulated, lied and so forth in the name of personal pursuits and in discovering these deeper parts of herself. we know they can only find it in each other but will there ever be a respective point of fulfillment for eve and v? what does that look like?

i think what it comes down to with them both is that while boredom seems like a huge roadblock to them finding some sort of medium, to me any ‘success’ in establishing something is less about somehow ‘avoiding’ or ‘removing’ it but rather how do they factor that INto their own version of normal. is it forever leaving elaborate gifts of the bloody and not so bloody kind? is it forever chasing each other around the world? when even the show doesn’t know the endgame and are discovering it as they go, it’s certainly hard to theorize…. but it’s also exciting. they truly aren’t like any other couple.

that brings me to v ever ‘getting over’ eve and to me that’s an emphatic no. not by a long shot. in this scenario boredom does not necessarily equate getting over someone especially when it comes to eve and how irrevocably she has changed v (and vice versa). villanelle has met her match in eve and those emotions that jc herself said that in s3 we’ll see more of that have been unearthed bc of eve that v has pushed down for so long are not something she can detach from eve, though she may try. between that and their physical dual scars, they’re bound.

while i don’t have a step-by-step guide for how this could realistically pan out as there’s still so much we don’t know about them and this show is wildly unpredictable in the best way to me, at least, it all goes back to what i said before of them needing to recode and redefine what normal means individually and between each other — to continue their self-actualization, in other words. ultimately the hope is fulfilling their respective needs without trying to mold and control it for the other. we saw v attempt something along these lines with her learning from her past experience with anna and her husband and actively deciding to not kill niko even though no doubt that would’ve been the fastest point A to B route in getting eve in her mind (we’ll save the whole framing niko for gemma’s murder for another time lol). she may not fully understand it but she understands it enough to know that it would have lasting consequences for her and eve. “but eve would never forgive me if i hurt you, niko. would she?” the delivery of that line, thank you queen jodie.

i probs presented more questions than answers… but this show ya know smh. what do you think? would love to know your thoughts and thanks for the q’s.

[shi-daisy]

Ghost

Ah, the angsty theme. I'll be honest I've never been fond of sad stories, but I'd be lying if I said Ulquihime dosen't have potential for really tragic stories, be it a one shot or a full length fic. Plus they're the only ship I would ever use this song with. Fits so well with them 😢

Special thanks to @vikowolf for letting me use her gif. Go give this talented bean some love!

I hope you all like!

@ulquihimeweek

Ulquihime Week- Day 4- Haunting/Touch Starved

Ghost

"Are you afraid of me, woman?"

She remembered his voice clearly, along with his empty emerald eyes.

Ulquiorra was turning into ash, but he did not despair, instead he reached out for her.

"No, I'm not afraid. I've never been afraid." Orihime tried to hold his hand but his fingers turned to ash under her touch.

"No! Ulquiorra please don't go! Don't die!"

She wanted to run. To heal him, to keep him from falling apart, but her feet didn't move. All she could do was beg him to stay alive.

The result was the same every night, he'd turn to ashes before her eyes and she would wake up screaming his name.

"Ulquiorra!" she called. There was no response, for her apartment was empty.

'Thats right. I'm home...' she remembered. It was getting harder to tell the difference.

'Goddamn it not again!' Orihime felt a headache coming on. She pushed her covers and walked over to the kitchen.

She had run out of medicine, much to her chagrin. The kit was empty save for a bottle of sleeping pills.

'I forgot to go shopping again.' Ever since she got back home she was forgetting things more often than usual. To her luck, both Rangiku and Toshiro had stocked up the fridge before going back to the Soul Society, so she still had some food. Orihime grabbed a box of doughnuts and scarfed them down on the dinning room table.

She glanced at the clock. It read 1 a.m.

'I have school tomorrow, I can't fall asleep in class again! C'mon Inoue get it together!'

Last week she had fallen asleep during class and had the same dream. Not only had it been embarrassing to scream his name upon waking, but this time she'd been crying when she said it, and all her friends saw it.

They all looked concerned and tried to talk to her about it, yet she didn't want them near at all, especially not Ichigo.

"Staying mad at Kurosaki because of me?"

That voice again. She lifted her gaze and saw Ulquiorra sitting across from her.

"Can't you leave me alone for one night?!" she screamed, throwing a glass at him. The glass shattered after hitting the wall.

"Woman, please don't break the utensils. We both know I'm not really here."

"I wish you were."

"Why? Why do you miss me? I was a monster. I took you away from your friends, I kept you locked up and even killed the man you loved. Yet you miss me. It's not logical."

"I know."

"You'd be better off forgetting me."

"No. I refuse to forget you." Tears began streaming down her cheeks. Orihime gripped the edge of her nightgown trying to keep from sobbing. "I know we were never close, or even friends, but I did care for you.

It wasn't clear to me until you were nearing the end. You told me you were curious about us humans. And then I understood.

You wanted emotions, companionship, understanding, a heart...I was willing to give all of that to you. Had you lived."

Talking felt like having glass shoved down her throat, but she continued.

"Instead of welcoming you into my life as a dear friend all I had left of you was a pile of ash and a torn dress!

I should have tried harder to save you! Aizen said my powers rivaled those of the gods, and I yet when I had the chance to use them I froze like an idiot! I should've put myself between you and Kurosaki! I should've tried to escape on my own and come back for you when the war ended! There were so many ways for me to keep you safe. And I did nothing! I'll never forgive myself for letting you die."

Ulquiorra stood up and walked over to her. Then he hugged her, laying his head on her shoulder.

Orihime knew it wasn't real, but she didn't care. It felt real. His touch was cold yet comforting. She leaned into it.

"I could only hold your hand for a few seconds before it turned to ash, still, I could feel it. It was cold, it was gentle, it was electric...I'd give anything to hold you again, properly this time."

"We both know that's not possible, nor is it ideal.

My demise was no one's fault but my own, woman. I was the one who engaged Kurosaki un battle. Had I surrender you to him I would still be alive."

"No. He had forgiven his enemies before. Enemies that wouldn't have hesitated to cut him down if they could. What made you any different?"

"I do not know. Maybe the fact that I tried to kill him twice, or the fact that I took you away."

She scoffed. "Kurosaki dosen't care that much about me. He went to Hueco Mundo to fight Grimmjow, not for me."

"That's a narrow way to look at it. Kurosaki Does care for you, even if he dosen't show it."

"That's not enough for me. It'll never be enough for me, anymore."

She stood up, feeling slightly cold as Ulquiorra let go of her. The clock read 1:30 a.m

'I'm not going to fall asleep at this rate.'

Opening up the fridge again, taking a bottle from the very back. It has half empty, and the scent from it filled the whole apartment.

'Sora wouldn't be too proud seeing me like this.' she winced. 'Then again, we both inherited things from our parents that we didn't want. I wonder how those two lowlives are doing these days...'

The first glass always burned her throat but by the second the sting subsided and she got used to it.

"So now, you're just going to drink away and ignore me?"

Ulquiorra's voice startled her. "You usually don't stay this long. Even in my dreams you fade away after the first touch."

"My apologies. I cannot change the past."

"I know, you're only in my mind after all."

Again he walked over to where she was, this time she was the one who tried to hold him, but her hands went right through him.

Orihime began to cry again, not caring if she was being too loud. Ulquiorra sat beside her, holding her hand.

"Woman, what did you mean before by 'not enough'?"

"Exactly that. Empty gestures and fake concerns are not enough. They should've never been.'"

"Then what would be enough? What do you want?"

"You." she whispered. "I want you. Not your spirit, not in my dreams or in my mind. I want you here in the flesh. I want to hold you, to truly speak with you. To be with you."

"You shouldn't want that. You should move on. Everything's alright now, you're back home with your friends, this is what you should want."

"Well I don't!" she yelled. "I don't want any of this, if I can't have you by my side! It all feels so..."

"Empty." He finished for her.

"Yes. It's all so very empty."

Ulquiorra stayed silent for a moment, then he looked at her. "If that is your final answer, then I just have one last piece of advice."

"What would that be?"

"Go to sleep."

"I can't. You won't be there when I wake-"

He put a finger over her lips to silence her. "Yes. Yes I will. I'll even lay down with you."

Orihime didn't expect him to inch closer towards her and kiss her. His touch wasn't cold anymore, or maybe she was the one radiating warm. It didn't matter, this was what she'd been wanting for weeks now.

"Now please woman, go to sleep."

Orihime nodded, grabbing a couple sleeping pills from the kit and taking them with what was left of the liquor. The effect was immediate, as drowsiness began to take over.

She walked over to her bed, and settled in. Ulquiorra was lying beside her over the covers.

"I need you to promise me you'll be here when I wake up. I'm getting tired of seeing you disappear."

"I'll be here. I promise."

With that in mind she closed her eyes and let sleep take over. Ulquiorra would be there to greet when she woke up.

If she woke up at all.