#((anyway i'm already immediately obsessed with them btw))

[ladyseidr]

@mute-call ( plotted starter! )

A bulb in the sign above the diner flickered in the dulling light of early evening. Michael was sitting on the curb across from the restaurant, heels scraping against the pavement and forearms rested over knees. He was was supposed to be inside watching his younger siblings, what with his father's inability to focus on them or maintain a marriage.

Steven's presence was a good excuse to escape. ( Not that he had been particularly present for either sibling prior to Steven showing up. )

"We should get out of here before someone notices I'm missing." Either out of Henry's actual concern for Elizabeth and Evan or because his father had some new, exciting design to show him. "Come on." He pushed himself to his feet, dusting off his jeans. He offered a hand to help Steven up, sullen expression finally lightening into something that held a smile. "Come up with something for us to do, I'm out of ideas." His time with his other friends was often reckless and fast-paced, but he could admit ( if only to himself ) that he enjoyed slowing down and enjoying his time spent with Steven.

"Not the arcade, though. I'm sick of arcade games." His choice of distraction during long days at Fredbear's Family Diner. "Think fast—" and here he flashed Steven a grin, "—or I'll come up with something." Something stupidly risky, most likely.

[arlestial]

❝lavender haze❞

synopsis : Rin begged Ego to let you assist to one of his training games. But he wasn’t quite fond of your interactions with a certain player..

pairing : Rin Itoshi x genderneutral!reader •— Blue Lock

tw : A mix of fluff and comfort, with the slightest bit of angst (jealousy themes, possessiveness)

word count : 2700~ words

author-note : Hi !!! It's been so long, I missed writing so much... I finally passed my final exams, and I'm now in vacations; I’m going to Austria today. My blog is like- a blue lock obsession at this point lmao but ngl i like it that way. Btw, I’ve seen the movie and I'm just plain disappointed ? It was short asf, and the animation... well, we don't wanna talk about it. Reblogs and comments are highly appreciated :) sorry if it’s bad btw !! Anyway, take care of yourself ♡

A rare, smug smile appeared on RIN ITOSHI’s lips; a smile that immediately triggered his teammates, who looked at each other, dumbfounded. They weren’t used to observe him with such an expression written on his usual stern features; as soon as he left the locker rooms, whispers emerged in the sweaty air, begging for an explanation.

"No way he did," Isagi contested with a frown and a disapproving tone, much to Bachira’s dismay.

"I’ve seen it with my eyes," The other retorqued, "Believe me. He smiled, dude. I’ve never seen him smile before."

"We’re gonna get fired from Blue Lock. I swear— he wouldn’t be happy if it wasn’t terrible. He’s a sadist."

"No worries, my dear Isagi. We’re going to elucidate this mystery together," Bachira replied with a proud smirk of his own; Isagi sighed at his friend’s antics.

"Maybe it’s personal."

"It’s never personal enough for us not to be nosy !" The dual-haired boy nearly gasped, "Our duo is unstoppable."

With more or less desire to intrude Rin’s life, Isagi joined Bachira into a rather quick — and disappointing — mission, to solve the mystery around the cold-hearted guy’s smile, a smile they had the chance to witness.

"Ah. Itoshi asked Ego to let his partner see the next training game. I didn’t know he would be this enthusiastic once Ego accepted."

Anri’s revelation should’ve been a relief for the two men — they wouldn’t be expelled of the program. Thus, Isagi had been surprised and confused when he noticed Bachira’s quiet attitude.

"Aren’t you supposed to be delighted you discovered the truth ?", The raven-haired boy asked, curious, as they walked in the corridor to join their rooms again.

"I didn’t even have time to feel the thrill of the investigation," the other whined.

"At least we know he has a partner. It’s… let’s just say it’s surprising someone like him could ever get someone."

"Someone like me ?"

The sudden third voice scared the two men off, and they jumped. Of course, it was Rin. Always there at the worst moment. Isagi gulped.

"H-Hey, I didn’t mean it like that—"

"What Isagi was trying to say, is that we’re not picturing you as the lovey-dovey type of guy, you know ? Not a good boyfriend or something."

If Isagi could facepalm right now, he would, "Thank you for your help, Bachira, it’s even worse now", he replied in a murmur.

"Who said I couldn’t be the "lovey-dovey type of guy" ?", Rin huffed in his usual cold tone, "and a good boyfriend ?"

"Everyone," the two others responded at the same time. Rin rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"So, y’all just sat down and talk about who could be a good partner or not ? That’s probably why you’re still fucking losers at soccer."

Bachira held Isagi back, amused by his eagerness to show Rin "who’s the real loser between them". Rin walked away confidently, and above all, enlivened by Ego’s answer. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t looking forward to it, the butterflies already flying eagerly in his stomach in anticipation.

RIN ITOSHI’s belly butterflies died in an instant. It wasn’t fair. At all. He had been longing for you since weeks now, months even; he negotiated with Ego for who-knows-long, trying to find a way to make you come to a training game of his — so that he wouldn’t have to search for you in a huge crowd of exasperating, futile, and bland people. And here he was, watching you from afar talking with Isagi Yoichi. He cursed under his breath. This dude had nothing to do with you. He was nothing compared to Rin; a mere guy, with limited soccer skills and knowledge and experience and — why were you talking with him anyway ? When he was right there, waiting for you. The training have haven't even started yet, and playing with Isagi left a bitter taste in his mouth. He threw a hard glare in your direction, which you immediately noticed; you waved at him with a smile, and it nearly made him melt. It would've if he wasn't this upset in the first place. Bachira called for Isagi, and the raven-haired boy returned to the field with a smile. If he could, Rin would definitely wipe the smile off this random guy's face.

RIN ITOSHI tried not to let this affect him. But the prominent and everlasting burning sensation in his chest clouded his mind, making him loose his focus each time his eyes would fall on either Isagi, or you. And god knows how much he had missed you, how he needed to touch you now, to feel your skin just against his — to kiss you endlessly, and his gaze softened by pure reflex as he noticed you were staring at him. He felt guilty, to entertain such hideous resentment towards you, while you were just there for him, as beautiful as the day he left you in your shared apartment to join Blue Lock again after his short break. Was he jealous? It couldn't be. Why would he be jealous of Isagi? He was better than him in everything. Atter 45 minutes, when they all got a short break from the match, Rin refused to say a word. He was always rather quiet - but now, it felt a bit weird. He just stared at Isagi with a cold gaze, and the other boy frowned. When they had to join the field again, Isagi stopped Rin, a hand laying on his shoulder.

"Hey, is everything okay? If it's about the score of earlier, I already said -"

"Look," Rin cut out quickly, his tone slowly shifting to an irritated one, "I don't want to hear your fucking voice."

Isagi's brows were now even more furrowed in confusion,

"What the.. I did nothing bad, dude. If you're upset, that's not my problem. Deal with your childish feelings alone, I don't know."

Childish feelings ? It was deeper than that. Much to Rin's own surprise, he grabbed Isagi's collar, dragging him closer with a menacing look. He didn't know, did he ? How much Rin loved you, how much he required your whole attention. Maybe it was childish indeed, selfish even, to desire to be your whole world. The only one you would ever think about. If he could make you his forever, he would; and at the same time, you had every right to talk to other people, be friends with anyone, you were free after all. But that wouldn’t rub out the aching feeling in his heart, seeing you smile with someone else, having a good time with someone who wasn’t him. Maybe because in the very end, he was scared of losing you. Of you, finally realizing you deserved far better than what he could give you. He was distant, sometimes. He hurt you too much, argued with you on futile things, left for Blue Lock for months, he was a huge mess, and still, you wanted him. It was a mystery for Rin, but he wouldn’t ever complain. He was too engrossed in your love and affection, and somehow, even if he knew it was fundamentally wrong, he’d never wish for you to realize what you truly deserved. Because it wasn’t him. And he couldn’t bare to see you enjoying your life with someone else other than him.

"I’m going to end your pathetic and meaningless existence so quickly you won’t have time to take another breath," Rin spat sharply, "I’ll politely advice you not to approach them ever again — don’t want your disgusting germs to infect them, understood ?"

With these words, Rin yanked him away and joined the field, leaving a widened-eyed Isagi behind him. As soon as the game ended, the whole Blue Lock team began gathering their water bottles, heading to the locker rooms. Rin stayed behind, since he wanted to spend some time with you before your departure. When you both were finally alone, you walked down the stairs, and Rin immediately engulfed you in his arms. One hand was grabbing your side, the other resting on the back of your head, pulling you close. He sighed, inhaling your familiar perfume — it was his favorite, the one he gifted you recently — and pressed a delicate kiss to the crown of your head.

"I missed you so much," He declared, or more precisely, complained, and you chuckled, embracing him just as tightly.

"And I missed you even more," you responded, loosening your embrace to look at him. He could die for this fond look in the depths of your irises. You didn’t have to ask; his hands reached for your cheeks, tilting your head backwards to kiss you gently, yet, eagerly, a pleading for your tenderness. You kissed him back, amused by his move. He was usually the reserved type, especially in public — even if the whole stadium was empty now. Your lips parted to welcome his tongue inside, deepening the kiss even more, a slow dance mimicking his need for you. He kissed your forehead softly when you two broke away from one another.

"What happened earlier ? With Isagi. I thought you were gonna fight."

The question tensed him. Of course you had to bring it up. He stroked your cheek delicately, as if you’d shatter if he wasn’t careful enough.

"Nothing, love, don’t worry. I was just—"

"He told me about it, Rin."

You cut him, and he winced. Ah. That was a problem. He swore he discerned a tint of disappointment in your eyes, but it faded away too rapidly for him to search for it again.

"I thought we said no lies between us."

"I know, darling", he could only mutter. You gently took his wrists, then his hands, intertwining your fingers together.

"Am I not reassuring you enough, Rin ? I won’t ever leave you. Especially not for a guy I just met. You know that."

"More than enough," the memory of your smile and laugh when Isagi cracked a joke made him sigh, "it’s hard to believe sometimes. That’s all."

You nodded; with his lack of self-esteem, how was he supposed to believe you, anyway ? It was a constant fight against the insecurities crawling in the pit of his soul, however, you would never let them win. He suffered enough alone, now that you were there with him, you’d be in the frontlines.

"But it’s still true. I’m lucky to have you, Rin. Maybe one day you’d finally recognize that."

At this moment, he wanted to tell you he was lucky to have you, but he didn’t dare, especially not when he saw you reaching for him again, your arms around his neck. He let himself drown in your arms and comfort, soothed by your heartbeat — at this very precise instant, he swore his heart was beating for you. And if you wanted it on a silver plate, he’d gladly do so.

"I’m sure his joke wasn’t even that funny."

You chuckled, "maybe not better than yours, I must admit."

Not far away, two boys were spying on the scene; their investigation had been more successful than what they ever hoped for, "maybe he’s not that bad, after all."

"I thought he was going to choke me to death."

"Oh, he could."

RIN ITOSHI was a possessive man. Somewhere, he wanted you to rely on him, and him only — to be the only source of your happiness. He never had something to call his; you were the first. And he fully intended you to be the last.

[bendyartistic]

Be Aware of alexbstudios. (Part 2) TW: uh.. slur, sui mention.

Recently I've been requested by some people to make another awareness post about Alex, and what has been going on since I made my last callout. So.. let's take a look. I'm gonna be honest I have been paying little to no attention to him at all since my post up until this point, didn't think I'd have to.

Ever since I made it, Alex has been talking about me a lot more, and it feels much more obsessive in a way. I think it's funny but also pretty weird considering some of the things he's said about me. Eugh.

Anyways let's get to the stuff from after my callout to the present. This is just a rundown of everything, and there is some stuff I skipped since I didn't feel it was worth mentioning. Once my post had been made, a lot of people went over and said stuff to him (Though I didn't encourage that behavior, I only wanted to make my post so people knew about him, I'm not covering those unless it's important in this.) Little afterwards he made this... post. Erh, are you stalking me and other people?? ALSO don't say the r slur man, like what.

I find it really creepy that he has this list, and has notes along with them about why/who they are. Also why'd he spell my partners name like that? 💀 Next a little after that he reblogged someone's art and introduction saying this. (I don't want to really @ people in this, nor get anyone involved unless they asked to be.)

I still don't understand how Alex views me, but saying this in a reblog no less is so strange. Reblogging another post, saying this with it...

You're right Alex, I didn't need you in my life, yet here we are. Unfortunately. Besides that, no, 12 year old's should NOT be on Tumblr at all, even with restrictions, said restriction should be having the app blocked from their device.

I'm just gonna.. move on from that. Alex reblogged an art post, where he proceeded to @ over 50 people, myself included, saying "surely you can see the problem". I can't fit the entire thing sadly. I don't get what the point in these posts are honestly, besides annoy everyone. He's done it before as well. He got into a small bit of beef with a handful of folk not too long ago, which I got @'ed in at some point I think, didn't really pay much attention to it. Basically the original post is someone talking about art supplies and asking what one's other people use, which I personally think was a very neat post. Alex comes around though for some reason going off on nonsense. Hello? Who invited you!? (Again, censoring names cuz I don't want to get ppl involved.)

I'm honestly kind of wondering why he even showed up. He pretty soon after made this dumb post as if it could have some effect on the situation.. uh?

I guess mark your calendars guys for this date, where we have to immediately forget everything and forgive him! /j And there's this response he gave to an anon responding to his ✨patience✨ post.

Dunno, so far it hasn't because he's still talking about it, so clearly he hasn't gotten over it enough to let it blow over.

He's giving me those like.. stupid sigma edit vibes sometimes. Y'know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Also I'm not sure what to say about this really, but it's pretty funny.

Context for this next one: You and the person on your lockscreen fight god..? That's a weird one.

Wdym racist though? 🤨 Genuinely kinda curious about that. Btw wouldn't that make you like.. 9?? On a different note, I saw him previously talk about this "friend" he has going to a mental hospital, but I know nothing about it, nor do I really want to, however reblogging on an art post saying this feels off. Think the emotes are what do it.

Don't joke about mental hospitals at all, I shouldn't have to explain why. I'm going to move on from all the short stuff now because I do wanna start talking instead of making short joking comments.

Alex made this post, and so it begins with him talking about me again, eh?

Alex, you're already doomed. I can't put it any other way but from what I've seen maybe only 1 or 2 people even like you. The rest either hate you or want to avoid you at all cost, and I don't blame them at all considering you act like a fool and make everyone uncomfortable.

For my thoughts on you? I don't like you, never did. I just have to put up with you because this is the internet, and you'll probably never truly leave me alone like I once hoped. It's a shame honestly that you cannot follow a simple request from anyone. Don't think I don't know about your planned "response post" you're making, I'm still waiting for it. I don't know what good it's gonna do you though. Personally I don't care if you make one, I'd just read it to see the stuff you make up in it lol. (Edit: He decided to stop working on it after seeing this post lol.)

Enough of my rambling, I should continue with this so I can stop talking about him sooner. Regrettably I had to actually look up what this was about, I felt.. iffy reading it.

Saying gyatt right afterwards wasn't funny. At all. I'm quite upset now. There was absolutely no reason for that.

I was gonna be reasonable and say something genuine but I don't feel like it anymore, this ruined my mood. All I have to say is as much as I dislike you, don't actually do that. Sadly moving to the next nonsensical thing, he made a poll post asking this. (It's still ongoing btw)

Are people like.. forced into giving a reason? Like if I for example chose Bendy, am I immediately supposed to state my reasons? What if I don't want to, are we being held at gunpoint? What's up with that? I'm too lazy to interact with the post, I don't really feel like it anyways even if I wasn't lazy. Which one would you choose though lol I'm going to be serious now again cause this last thing is really just.. what the fuck. Palestine related 🍉, someone asking for help came to Alex, and this was his response to it...

MY GOD Alex. Did you really have to respond to that in this immature, insensitive fucking manner? Could it have not been in one of your stupid rambling posts. It should've been. I'm sorry to the person and I'm sorry I had to read it. You're pretty sick honestly. You need help.

That's it. I'm done.

In conclusion:

Alex is still the same and is still never going to change probably. He still shouldn't be here and I believe he really should get off now more than ever. If not I fear what else he might do next.

All I can really tell you folks is please, DNI with Alex, just leave him alone and block him. You're again not obligated to, but I am suggesting it if you want to be left alone by him. And hey, maybe you'll make it onto his dumb creepy list too, who knows. Alright, I'm finished, I stayed up way too late for this... I'm tired. Cya.

Reblogs are much appreciated, it helps spread the word, thanks.

[kymsys]

hiii i'm obsessed with your merman au!! if it's okay i totally let it take over my brain for a hot minute so ummm here's a little gift if you will accept it 👉👈 sorry to bother, i just HAD to write something dkfdl;fjg. your art is so gorgeous btw <33

--

After weeks of secretly housing Satoru in his private garden, Suguru had devised a way to safely return him to the ocean without being caught. He'd even relayed all the information about the kingdom's fishing system so Satoru would be able to steal the occasional fish without getting caught in the nets himself. He had to admit, he would miss having his little secret around. But he knew he couldn't keep Satoru cooped up forever. Satoru was a creature of adventure. He was probably tired of Suguru anway.

After a few attempts, Suguru successfully scooped Satoru up in his arms, Satoru wrapping his tail around his waist to stay up. His skin was cold to the touch. He teased Suguru as he clumsily navigated the path in the dark, even though he'd already walked it alone several times, and Suguru hated the way his heart stuttered at the siren's breath on his ear.

Really, Suguru should've done this much sooner. He should've released Satoru as soon as he realized he was falling for the creature. It was hard not to when it was in Satoru's nature to be enticing. Suguru let himself spend far too much time with him in the garden, let Satoru flutter his fingertips over his collarbones, let him beckon him closer and nibble on his ear playfully, let him lick the blood off his wrist when he got scratched up. He was never sure if Satoru was threatening him or flirting with him, never sure if it was all a game or if there was actually part of him that was interested in Suguru.

Suguru willed his mind to stop racing as he knelt down on the rocks and lowered Satoru into the water. Satoru immediately swam away and back, did a few turns and flips, gleefully splashing in his newfound freedom. Suguru smiled, heart tugging in his chest as Satoru slowly moved farther away. He was about to turn around when Satoru came back up to the edge of the rocks, resting his forearms on them and beaming up at Suguru.

"Care to join me?" He teased with a sharp grin. Suguru huffed out a laugh and shook his head.

"What, you're not dying to get away from me?" Suguru shot back, trying to keep his smile light even though it felt heavy on his face. Satoru pawed at his ankle and Suguru obliged without thinking, sitting and dipping his feet in the water, Satoru folding his arms atop his thighs.

"If you could breathe underwater, I'd drag you in here with me." His eyes practically glowed in the moonlight, a deceptively innocent smile curling at the corners of his perfect lips.

"You'd do that regardless." Suguru let himself give into the urge to push Satoru's hair off his forehead. It would probably be the last time anyway. Satoru's smile dropped the slightest bit.

"No." He reached up to touch Suguru's cheek, lightly stroking his cheekbone down to his jaw. "Not to you."

MANGO HOW DARE YOU WRITE SMTH SO BEAUTIFUL 😭😭😭 its amazing i love it so much HNGGGGG. THANK YOU?! thank you so much, i cant believe ppl love my merman au so much, thanks for this sweet gift and thanks for indulging with me 🥺 funnily enough @kingdomofred had also written that suguru took gojo out of the ocean into a pond. ARE WE ALL VIBING TOGETHER? it seems to be a thing for sure xD okay i have to dive a bit deeper into why i love your writing so much: the way that suguru isnt sure if gojo actually likes him or he is just acting accordingly to his siren behaviour?? it breaks my heart, its so bittersweet but yet i love it so much !! it fits so perfectly and i love the resolve at the end that yes ofc gojo likes him ; u ; ♥ . the image you described of suguru carrying gojo and the way gojos tail would lay around sugurus waist?? THAT IS SO FUCKING NICE?! definitely gonna put that on my to draw list !! and gojo nibbling on sugurus ears and licking his wounds and blood....fuck thats hot. i have no other words left. truely. THANK YOU MANGO IM IN LOVE 🥰(made my day)

[sugarcloudsky]

thanks for explaining what is considered short character thoughts!! I really appreciate it :)) sooo uhmmm.. remember when one of affogato cookies disciples mentioned something about a Licorce gods/spirits or something? I don't remember which one it was- but how would the dark cacaoian cookies react to reader being that licorice sea god/spirit? And they, like, turn into stone when sun comes up? Or when they use over the maximum of their powers? Btw by dark cacaoian cookies I mean like the main ones like dark cacao, affogato..yk, right? And maybe sea fairy cookies reaction to readers relationship with them bc I feel like reader and her would be related if they were like a licorice sea god/spirit.. this isnt as short as I thought it would be- preferably seperatly, I hope this counts as a short character thought though because I'm obsessed with this concept.. Anyway, make sure to eat, sleep, and don't overwork yourself! Take care of yourself and take your time!! If this doesn't count as a short character thought then I'm sorry and I can also wait until requests are open again! Or maybe I'm just overthinking this-

nah ur fine dw!!! sorry for taking a bit to get to this!!! ^_^

didnt get to go too crazy with these bc i didnt want them to get too long, but i honestly think this concept is super interesting! if you want a full fic of this concept feel free to send a request when they open up again!

the rest are under the cut bc it got pretty long anyways, lol

———————

dark cacao cookie would be wary of you at first. he already shows no mercy for any of the licorice monsters who dared climb the kingdom’s wall, but now seeing a licorice monster that resembles a cookie was definitely something else. not only that, but he’s once again confused when you see you’re very weak, nor even aggressive. he tends to see you wander around the kingdom carefree at dark, only retreating back to the licorice sea when the sun begins to come back up. for now, he’ll leave you be, but just know he’ll always keep an eye on you.

affogato cookie is as always, intrigued. he would immediately try to think of ways to find out more about you, find out how he could use your powers to his own advantage. he sees you strolling the kingdom at night by your lonesome, and he ends up approaching you. he immediately begins buttering you up as much as you can, complimenting and manipulating you in order to gain your power. once he has you, he acts as if he cares for you; giving you a room with covered windows so the sunlight wouldn’t bother you. but in the end, he truly has only selfish motivations.

your first time meeting caramel arrow cookie wasn’t really what you would want when you’re first introduced to someone. unless you like someone pointing their bow at your throat, then yeah. she keeps you still, the string of the bow pulled back ready to shoot you. she’s completely focused on you, waiting for you to make any kind of movement that could be threatening. but you don’t make any other movements, other than raising your hands up in surrender. she huffs, lowering her bow but keeping her guard up. she decides that the king would know what to do with you.

crunchy chip cookie first encountered you when you were wandering around the snowy forests after dark. he was first alerted when he saw his cream wolves run off barking at movement somewhere deep in the forest, only to find you hiding in a tree while the cream wolves kept barking and scratching at the bark to get to you. he immediately prepares to fight, brandishing his claw hand to show that he’s armed. you swear you mean no harm, that you were just frightened from the barking, but he doesn’t buy your story on bit. better start talking, intruder!

sea fairy cookie is the one kindest to you out of everyone. she treats you as her own family, spending time with you as much as she can. she hides you from the sun, knowing it could injure you and turn your entire body into stone within a matter of seconds whenever you’re exposed to even a little bit of sunlight. because you’re only active during the night time, you’ve come to know and love moonlight cookie as well. these two are like family to you, and even if you come from a darker part of the sea, they still love you equally.

[deardoomedworld]

I'm obsessed with how Tereesz bases his worth on his usefulness. He can't tell his friends he's not an ICP agent anymore, because he'll lose his value. (Something Khan literally says to him btw, that he can't get fired because they need him at the ICP for access - Tereesz has already lost his job at this point because he lost it before the book starts.)

While coming down from the ZA/UM high his subconscious reveals he's scared of Khan "for some reason" - he later (during hangover #2) also begs Khan not to turn him in. That's what he's afraid of - being ditched because he has no value anymore. What's most painful about that to me is that when Khan ultimately does exactly that, he forgives him immediately.

Behind the ICP blinds drawn over his eyes, behind the unflinching composure and brilliant lies, what we see of Tereesz is loyalty. The first thing he says when he meets up with them again is "Did (Jesper) apologise?" (He also tried to call Jesper before coming, was it about this?) and one moment when they were kids that stands out to me is that after Tereesz' impressive jump of the cliff, successfully landing in front of the girls (including the goddess from the 9th grade!) he immediately turns around to catch Khan's glasses.

Anyway, all this to say that when Khan trades Tereesz for info in the end, Tereesz is basically like "yea that makes sense, I had nothing to contribute anymore" bc that's genuinely how he sees himself and it kills me.

[imaginarylungfish]

Hello, if you don't mind, can I ask, who are your top favorite romantic relationship's couples in any media, like anime/manga, tv series, books, etc (can be canon or non-canon)? Feel free if you want to write the reasons or not of why you love them....Thanks if you want to answer....

Ooh how fun! I should just screenshot my ao3 dash lol. Let's see... almost all of these are all animanga (and not canon), but in order of my love for them at this particular moment in time:

TodoBakuDeku

BakuDeku

KilluGon

MatchaBlossom

SatoSugu

ShiGuang

TigerGhost

SasaMiya

ShunMio

KazuRei

Now, explanations, *spoilers*, and honorable mentions below the cut!

TodoBakuDeku (My Hero Academia)

Obviously not canon and never will be but oh does this ship have a chokehold on me. I just think this trio is so balanced in every way. Like we have our precious TodoDeku who connect by being nerds and the sweetest boys. Then we also have TodoBaku who are just lovely little menaces. And, of course, BakuDeku--can't beat friends to enemies to lovers. And then they all come together to form a masterpiece. Idk I just love this ship so much.

BakuDeku (My Hero Academia)

So I honestly really wasn't into this ship too much until reading the final war arc and meta. Other people's viewpoints changed my mind! Hori has done a really great job of portraying BakuDeku's complex relationship in the manga (for however you view their canon relationship). So like idk how can I not ship For-the-Rest-of-Our-Lives Katsuki with Control-Your-Heart Izuku?

Sidenote: I almost didn't include this on the list because I tend to only really ship this pair while reading the manga. I never shipped them in the anime unless it was TodoBakuDeku with Deku as a hinge. And I don't even read many fics with just Katsuki and Izuku. I just feel like fandom BakuDeku feels incomplete without Shouto for some reason. Like I'm Team BakuDeku for the manga, Team hinge TodoBakuDeku in the anime, but throuple TodoBakuDeku in the sanctuary of my mind/on ao3. (Maybe that'll change once I start watching Season 7 though.)

KilluGon (Hunter x Hunter)

I only watched this anime this year but ohmygod I immediately fell in love with Gon and Killua. They are so precious. I mean, Killua is just a little smitten kitten. And Gon? He's in it. Anyway, love their dynamic and of course I ship them. Gon is Killua's light after all!

MatchaBlossom (Sk8 the Infinity)

Literally just started shipping this so I'm in the throes of obsession rn but their dynamic? *chef's kiss* (hehe, you like what I did there?) Childhood friends? Pining while the other falls for another? Realizing feelings? Already married bickering old couple? Give me all the headcanons please!

SatoSugu (Jujutsu Kaisen)

I mean, c'mon. Tragic gays are my weakness. They're gonna be OG for me. No one can compare. They're on a different level. All I want is for them to have hopped on a plane and gone somewhere they can finally find peace, is that too much to ask? (Gege??)

ShiGuang (Link Click)

Again, I said I like tragic gays. But god, I do hope they don't end up too tragic! I love this pairing. They balance each other out well. We have puppy dog Cheng Xiaoshi and cat Lu Guang. Perfection thx.

TigerGhost (Nicktoons Unite)

Ok so this crackship was brought on by my serendipitous viewing of Nicktoons Unite fanart on this beautiful app and subsequent reading of all their fics on ao3 (a grand total of four, btw). And I'm obsessed. I was a diehard Danny Phantom fan as a kid (we stan our queer/genderqueer/bisexual/trans ghost boy). And I never watched El Tigre as a kid, but the way the fandom portrays him and Danny together just hits. Salty and sweet with a lil bit of darkness? Yum.

SasaMiya (Sasaki to Miyano)

First canon ship on this list lol. You want fluff? You got it. Give me some good pining, consent, and mutual respect, thank you.

ShunMio (Stranger by the Shore)

Second and last canon ship on the list! Love me some good ole sun and moon. Idk their story is so cute. Plus, I like how Kii Kana portrays Shun's feelings regarding his sexuality and how that affects his relationship with Mio. It's relatable.

KazuRei (Buddy Daddies)

I mean, this is practically canon, right? Well, at least queerplatonically (which we stan). Love our little found family. This anime had such a cute and goofy premise, how could I not fall for this ship?

(Honorable mentions: TodoDeku, TodoBaku, Labru, DabiHawks, Renga, VashWood, Kappa x Siren, Boyfriends, EraserMic, ItaFushi, InuOkko, ShokoHime, HaiNana, LeoPika, KudoIchi, TogaChako)

[marvel-and-chicago-fan]

Taylor

Warnings: None

A/n: Small little blurp? I think that's what you call it. In celebration of me and my friend missing Taylors Concert because we didn't ask our parents to take us. (they said yes after we asked them(she already went to a different city)). This is rushed because i'm on my phone but im so bad at getting my two imagine i'm writing done so until then Here you go 🙂 (BTW IM SO SORRY IF YOU DONT LIKE TAYLOR SWIFT 🙁)

Word count: 528

Summary: You love Taylor swift but you know you won't be able to go to the concert because your brothers will say no, but little do you know somebody was  listening to your conversation

______________________________________________________________

“Cause baby i could build a castle” You were obsessed with taylor swift, you wanted to ask your brothers but you knew they would say no and besides Will hates concerts, anytime there's one in town he basically has a field day at work. 

“What is she singing, she's been singing that for days now?” Will sighed. “Taylor Swift will.” Jay replied. “And how would you know that?” Will was wondering why Jay would know Taylor swift's song. “I work with hailey basically everyday, and i live with my teenage sister. Of course I'm gonna know who she is” Jay chuckled. “You've got a good point”

***

“It would be so fun to go to Taylor's concert. I would have died if she gave me her hat during 22” You and your friend Alyssa loved Taylor Swift but you guys also like Harry Styles, but she liked Harry more than Taylor. 

“Yeah that would be so cool but my parents for sure wont let me go since i'm already going to Harry Styles Last Concert in a couple of months, and your brothers are strict sometimes” Alyssa sighed into the phone. 

“Anyways i gotta finish some homework I'll see you tomorrow Lys' ' You said as you were going to hang up the face time. “Bye Y/n see you tomorrow” Alyssa waved at the screen and then she was gone. Now time to Sob and cry over having to do homework.

But outside your room Jay made a call. “Hey Josh, can I ask you a really important Favor and question?” 

***

Jay walked into the living room where you were planted on the couch watching your favorite show, The Rookie.

“Y/n, since you didn't ask us about going to the Taylor swift concert, how about we dress up and go buy some merch tomorrow?” Jay wasn't much on dressing up but it was for you. You turned towards Jay and looked at him “For real? The lines are gonna be really really long” You knew that for a fact. 

“I may or may not know someone who will be able to get us to the front of the line” Your eyes lit up and immediately ran upstairs to find things you'll need to make your outfit perfect.

***

You and Jay had gotten a lot of merch. Wills gonna kill you guys for sure. “Hey Y/n?” Jay Pulled Two pieces of paper out of his pocket “Hm? NO WAY OMG” you were literally screaming. Your brother Jay, JAY MOTHER FICKING HALSTEAD, IS HOLDING TAYLOR SWIFT TICKETS.

Before you said anything else you ran to hug Jay and almost tackled him to the ground “Thank you, thank you, thank youuuuuuu” But something didn't make any sense “Wait? How did you get tickets, they were really expensive and buying them off ticketmaster ended like a while ago?”

“Lets Just say, Taylor is an old friend of mine and she owed me a huge favor and backstage tickets.” Jay grinned. “Thank you so so soooooo much, You're the best big brother anybody could ever ask for. I love you Jay.” You hugged him again. “I love you too Y/N”

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Horrible one today because i wrote it in 1 hour but i did something 🙂

[liqsouls]

I have some thoughts and I won't call it "a theory" or "analysis" lol, it's more like product of my obsession with Swift and kaylor combined with me being Greek mythology geek. Also idk if anyone mentioned it before so sorry If I'm late to the party.

So...I rewatched Anti Hero mv and now I have some new thought about this particular moment:

«Pierced through the heart but never killed»

You know who in Greek mythology pierce through the heart but never kills? Eros (Cupid) does. Ig it's already cool symbolism if we consider that moment of piercing with that arrow as falling in love and that love makes her bleed with this lavender thing (which is smth that a lot of ppl in gaylor fandom interpretate as her gayness or whatever). But then I remembered one of the most popular myths abt Eros which is legend abt Eros and Psyche (btw reference to this myth was used in last season of Killing Eve).

First interesting thing is that this myth in some way about secret love or rather love with some secrets. Cause Psyche for a long time didn't see Eros, didn't know who her lover was and they used to meet only at night. And all other ppl knew that Psyche had a lover but they also had no idea who is he.

Lets look up some more info abt myth.

Aphrodite (goddess of love and mother of Eros) was mad at Psyche cause she was incredibly beautiful and 'Dite ordered Eros to use his power(arrows) to make Psyche fall in love with horrible ugly creature. But when Eros saw Psyche «he himself felt his heart pierced by one of his own arrows» means he fell in love with her and ofc failed his mission.

Meanwhile Psyche was worried cause she never was in love with anyone and nobody was really in love with her. This situation stressed out her parents. So they asked Apollo for advice. «Apollo decreed that Psyche, dressed in black dress, should be brought to the summit of a mountain and stay there alone. The husband that was assigned to her, a winged serpent, terrible and more powerful than the gods themselves, would come up and take her for his wife». Ofc it was horrible fate but it's not like they could do smth. But when Psyche did as Apollo told her and was ready to accept her fate...

«While she was shaking and crying in the quiet night, a slight breeze reached her. It was the fresh wind of Zephyr, the mildest of the winds. He felt that she was being raised....She then woke up by the sound of clear stream and when she opened her eyes she faced an imposing and magnificent castle. It seemed destined to a god, with gold columns, silver walls and floors of inlaid precious stones». ( Bejeweled mv vibe maybe?). That's where she "met" Eros tho she didn't see him, but she heard him and understood that castle is her home now and the voice belongs to her lover aka the one she always wished for.

Psyche didn't know much abt him, met him only at night(it was Eros' conditions) and during day she was always alone so she asked to bring her sisters in the castle. Eros didn't like that idea cause he believed her sister will influence her in a bad way but he let her invite them anyway. Sisters were very jealous of what Psyche had (bad sisters bejeweled vibe again?) so they started to sabotage her thoughts abt her mysterious lover and made Psyche more curious abt who he was.

«Indeed, that night, when her husband fell asleep peacefully, she took courage and lit the candle....The light did not show a monster but the most beautiful of men....But while he was leaning on him, a drop of oil fell from the candle on the back of that handsome, young man. He woke up in pain and saw the light. He looked her at the eyes and, facing Psyche's distrust, he left their bedroom without uttering a single word. Psyche immediately ran after her husband. It was dark and she could not see him, but could hear his heartbroken voice: Love can not live without trust.»

Psyche understood that her lover was Eros himself but Eros felt hurt and betrayed. (The great war vibes?).

Psyche was desperate and went to Aphrodite to ask what to do. Aphrodite thought that Psyche wasn't a good match for Eros so, in order to prove her love for Eros, Psyche had to complete three impossible, even dangerous tasks. (The great war vibes again?). Btw one of the tasks was to separate «different small seeds of wheat, poppies, millets and many others».

Long story short, even when Psyche completed all tasks Aphrodite was mad at her and told that she(Psyche) will forever remaine her servant and won't be with Eros. But other gods decided to tell/show Eros what Psyche did to prove her love and he was touched by it, believed that Psyche truly loves him and actually never meant to betray him. So Eros decided to save Psyche: «He left his room and found Psyche exhausted in his mother's garden».

They had their happy ending. Actually it's one of the most beautiful and pure love stories in Greek mythology. And yeah for me this legend kinda vibes with some Taylor's songs but one question still remains.

Who is the archer (Eros) and who is the prey(Psyche?)?

[justablah56]

yeah<3 this was where i stopped writing and eventually forgot about jt 😭😭😭🌽🌽 OOPS DIDNT MEAN THE CORN oh whatever ANYWAYS !!! DAMN I WISH I WROTE MORE CUZ I WOULD READ THIS AS A FIC EUAOEIAO3IW2.... maybe i have to come back to it HSOFOSNPEFN...... anyways ummm so yeah taylor starts panicking IMMEDIATELY and he is shivering because he is freezing cold because when your body temp is really high then everything feels way colder bc of the contrast !!! that's why he's shivering <3 also like. swiftli ♡♡♡ link is trying to calm him down but kinda failing at it and he's really out of it and irritable and freaking the fuck out and the others being in the room too is making taylor even more anxious because. who wants to be Seen during a panic attack really? no one. HFUOSKTHHRT so anyways link somehow subtly gestures for them to leave when he picks up on taylor's anxiety about them being There 👍👍👍 and i honestly.... my memory is kind of fuzzy but i think i remember something like planning for link to have. A LOT of trouble calming taylor down and eventually settling for putting on an anime on his phone or tablet or smth so taylor can watch it because <3 comfort show <3 good for grounding <3 and it helps taylor calm down

and meanwhile norm has been texting asking if hes ok 😭👍 . i think i actually brainstormed this idea w/ happi and it was her idea that norm is texting link every 5 seconds when hes trying to calm taylor down and scary snatching the phone from him HEIAIE9WI3WORJ

anyways link messages them back and norm brings water cuz taylor is still overheating 😭 and yeah . cute i guess ♡

abwhdjsn I'm already completely obsessed w this btw <33 but auhhhgghh Lincoln realizing that everyone being there was just stressing Taylor out ���� and him trying everything to try n help Taylor calm down even if its not easy 🥺🥺 and normal texting link every 5 seconds to see if Taylor's ok 🥺🥺 ough I love this sm <333

[chomperzzzz]

AAAAAAHHRFR THE FIRST EPISODE?!??!

CHEWING, SCREAMING, SPINNING IN A CIRCLE

WOW. Okay,,,. can we please please PLEASE talk about the first episode because. AAAA

SO. here are some of my like IMMEDIATE thoughts

WOWOWO Teeth!!!!! Oh my GOD (gods?!?!?!)!!!! obsessed. actually so fucking obsessed. I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS

WHY IS TEETH'S HOUSE A MUSEUM?!??! clearly they aren't like a celebrity (well at least not a LIKED celebrity akjdshadj) but they're also like clearly VERY well known. Apparently they've committed every single crime ever?? I mean iconic tbh but why a museum?? DId people think they died?? were they EXILED?? so many questions hhrngnh

AS LONG AS WE'RE TLAKING ABOUT TEETH did anyone notice Olive exists as a STORYBOOK in Teeth's reality?? HUH?? THat can happen? AND MARIS LOOKED LIKE TEETH'S ""EXALTED" (spelling??) WHAT'S UP WITH THAT? How are the "realities" connected??? What connects them?

OKay also on that subject -- that biography Teeth picked up i -- aksdhasj WHO IS THAT ON THE FRONT COVER??? pic included for ref btw vv

SO WHO IS THAT?? I mean that's clearly Teeth's hand??! It's clearly some sort of scandalous affair i mean but if Teeth is accused of EVERY CRIME then why is this one such a big deal?? Was the person their relative?? Friend?? LOVER?? A celebrity?? (i mean w those boots we can see outlined..,,,,, slay tbH??? in multiple ways??)

5. Teeth wrote SPECIFICALLY "they're lying to you"... THEY?? I assume that means Teeth isn't guilty of ALL of those crimes (hopefully??) but is they the govt?? A group of critics?? evil people?????!?! what the FUCK /pos

6. ALSO worth mentioning i mean this house clearly had a lot of people living in it... you can see the wedding clothes, childhood objects etc etc -- where is everyone else?? were they kicked out/??? did they leave willingly??????? AHSDJASDKSJADHKDHHHHHH I NEED TO KNOW MORE

7. OKAY SPEAKING OF OLIVE -- omg i'm so obsessed w her hhrnrhghr talking to snails is the gender of the day folx

8. so Teeth has Olive's storybook -- how far does it go???! do they know everything that's going to transpire?? stuff that's already happened?? frothing at the mouth /so so pos

9. OLIVE JUMPS THE WALL BAD BITCH but what's the deal with the wall?? WHERE IS SHE GOING WHY IS SHE GOING TOWARDS WATER WATER IS OBVIOUSLY AN ISSUE HERE QUEEN STOP NOOO

10. WHY is grey green dude ("Scholar"??? i think i'm starting to get a hang of this) following her?? OLIVE WHAT DID U DO GET BACK HERE!!! I'm also starting to get the vibe each "reality" has v v v v different pantheon members bcz this dude is so crazy

11. OKAY NOW 42 -- omg. WOW. the vibes holy SHIT my smol bean <3 sinnamon roll <3 <3 <3

12. SEE IT'S GREY GREEN GUY AGAIN BUT HIS VIBES ARE SO DIFF?? okay so like. he's clearly 42's boss but their relationship is kinda wack bc WHY IS "BOATMAN" STEPPING IN?? does this mean 42 is like their warlock now or something?????

13. WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH 53?? he did NOT look happy to see 42 omg omg does 42 have a reputation?? or is there just beef between them in particular????? AAAAaaa i can't evennnnnnfjsdj

14. 42 looked HAPPY to see signs of "traveler".... *eyes emoji* bc what is THEIR relationship???

15. DARLINGWHATISINTHATTRUNK??!?!

16. Okay Darling is aligned w BLUE GUY (exalted again!!) this is so interesting omg i wouldn't have expected that?? like pink person is beauty and high achieving stuff so that's super interesting

17. NOTABLE ABOUT THE DARLING STUFF -- so Darling is like WORKING with the pantheon??? she's also like the only non-pantheon person we see -- HOW DID SHE GET HERE WHAT DID SHE DO TO GET HERE??? like everyone else is either MEGA separated in power or they're all chill but she is like THE ONLY NON-GOD??! tf

18. why do I stan Donny tho I --

19. MARIS??! MILF ALERT????? LITERALLY CW: MILFS AAAAAAAAAAAAA I AM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH

20. MARIS IS ACTUALLY LIKE FIGHTING THE GODS. HOLY SHIT okay so clearly there's gonna be some ~conflict~ here bc WHAT!

21. maris is tatted too...... omg... ANYWAYS

22. okay so who tf is Maris afraid of??? like she squared up w stone guy and seems to have fought krackens so WHO SCARES MARIS??? I'm scared hold me,,,,,,

23. TUCKER HAS MY WHOLE HEART IMMEDAITELy

24. KYYYYYYYYYLE okay so this is SUPER interesting Tucker is literally just CHILL w the pantheon like?? they're not gods or anything they're just dudes??

25. ALSO tucker is like totally fucking w the pantheon!! why are there no consequences here??? it seems like this place like. doesn't have any laws?? okay why is this place so idyllic and perfect for everyone except for tucker??? NO OFFENSE QUEEN I LITERALLY LOVE U BUT PLS SEEK THERAPY

26. WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE GRAVE HEY UH WHAT

27. FOLLOW-UP QUESTION??? WHOSE GRAVE IS IT????? BC UHHHH TUCKER IS BRINGING THE GRAVE FLOWERS AND AHHH TUCKER MY SWEET PRECIOUS BLORBO ALSO WHY THE *FUCK* DOES THE GRAVE SAY "I'M SORRY"??? WHO'S SORRY????

28. all i can say after that is. omg. why did Telos take all of them????? why these people??

29. also shoutout TELOS bc omg <3 my sweet summer child ASLKJDjsdklja why is he so baby

30. WHY ARE THEY ALL AT TELOS' HOUSE WHERE IS TELOS' HOUSE WHAT'S GOING ON W ALL OF THEIR REALITIES

FUKCKJDJKSHC okay this is going to be my whole personality for LITERALLY forever now I'm screaming crying scratching

it also must be said... the shipping potential here is >>> heheheheee but that will have to be it's own post

okayokayokay i just needed to get that out of my system hrfshnasd LOVE YOU ALL KTHXBAI

[thefunkyfurry]

can't decide between gunlance, lance and charge blade for my second weapon in mhwilds!!! (putting a read more in because this got *rambly*)

definitely using switch axe as a primary (my beloved <3) but idk what to take for a secondary

been considering light bowgun as well but i feel like that's not going to end up the best

i was so firm on the lance this morning but then i had a think and was like "hmm yeah lance is good but gunlance is a lance with a gun in it and it looks cooler and explodier"

charge blade is probably not going to be it, as cool as i love chainsaws and explosions i don't think i have the technical ability and patience to learn it at all

so it's between lance and gunlance

if they're bringing back switch skills then it's gunlance all the way because the charge blast dash is such an amazing mobility option mid battle that i relied on to get anywhere before i got evade extender from seregios

will have to think long and hard about this but wilds is a ways off for now (betting on q2/3 2025!) so plenty of time to decide and hey what's stopping me from trying both

or all of them

i mean when i first started rise i used heavy bowgun and very quickly found out it was a shit weapon in rise

then moved to lance but found it a little lacking

once i brought that up to my friend though he said "well what about gunlance, it's like the lance but better and you can do explosions with it"

so i tried it out and immediately fell in love

used gunlance from high rank well into master rank

in the middle of master rank though, i think it was right before astalos, the same friend bought me world for us to play together

where i tried out the gunlance, found it disappointing and lacking impact, then saw my friend using the switch axe

and my god the explosions he was putting out, the damage, the sheer flashiness of it

because those are the only 3 things i care about in a mh weapon: how much damage it does (big number make brain happy), how flashy it looks (rule of cool and all), and most importantly how much of my screen can be covered by explosions at once (bowgun = near 0, lance = 0, gunlance = a good amount especially with the wirebug burst skill from sunbreak that allowed me to 3-shot a low rank tetranodon, switch axe = it's an axe that turns into a sword that can shoot a ton of flames, latch onto monsters and deal tons of damage to them before exploding)

anyway i said to myself that i had 2 contenders for my new primary: switch axe and charge blade

first i tried charge blade and it did not click whatsoever. i did a single hunt with it and it felt underwhelming the entire time. i recognise this was almost definitely me just not putting in the time to learn it properly but i don't really want to put in the time to learn something i don't even really like

then i tried switch axe and holy fuck it was amazing

i know swaxe is kinda op in world but it was still some of the most fun hunts i've ever had since i started

now my friend can take his gunlance back (he used it before me) and i can take his switch axe (he is very happy about this)

now i'm a good way through sunbreak (just hunted shagaru magala tonight) and coming into high rank in world and i am obsessed with the switch axe now

it's honestly the most fun i've had playing monster hunter yet and i can already tell i'm going to stick with it a long while yet

i know this post kinda went off the rails but it's 4:30am and my brain wanted to thoughtdump about monster hunter to, well, no one

i guess the moral of this story is don't be afraid to try new things, and if you know someone who's more experienced then be sure to reach out and talk to them, ask them for suggestions and tips (i've asked my friend so much stuff about monster hunter while playing [even in master rank btw!!! just because you're far through the game doesn't mean you have to know everything!!!] and it's helped me learn so much). if you keep doing those 2 things then you'll learn a lot about what you're doing, get a lot more invested and skilled in it and find what works for you and what you enjoy doing most in it

if you are reading this right now then hi! welcome to a brand new part of my brain that my friend created. it's obsessed with monster hunter and i'm sure you'll see a lot more of it in the near future

hope you're having a good day/night

i'm going to bed

:3

[theworstanonymousblog]

To the worst anonymous blogger

Before we get into the letter, I think I should give you some context on my life. This is a letter to my future self (who is hopefully doing better than I am right now). I've been doing a lot of thinking, which is just so out of character so I thought I should write about it. Now we can get into the letter...

 To the future version of myself, 

    Hi. How are you? I hope everything is going well in your life. I think I need to say how I feel because a lot has been weighing on me. Recently, I've just been thinking about everything. Like usually when there's silence in my everyday life, I listen to music or watch a show, but now I've just been sitting in the silence and thinking. I can't exactly pinpoint what what I'm thinking about, because it's not just one thing. 

    --- I actually eventually narrowed down what I'm thinking to two main points.

Also usually when I'm thinking, I'm daydreaming about the life that you have, but I haven't been doing that as much recently. Instead, I've mostly just been thinking about my life so far, and doing some self-reflection. This past week has been difficult because I've been more homesick than ever. I really don't want to be at college right now. It has nothing to do with the people or the classes - because both of those things are going great now - but it just feels like every day is a battle inside myself. I've though about asking my parents to come pick me up so many times but I haven't because it feels weak. I know that's not actually the truth, but my whole life I wanted to go to a college out-of-state. If I can't even make it an hour and a half away from home for two months at a time, then how was I ever going to make it to a college that was actually far away. And how am I going to make it when I live alone in hopefully a new state after college? So I guess that by forcing myself to stay here, it's a way of me proving to myself that I can be on my own, but it's not as easy as I thought it would be for myself. I also don't want to go home because I don't want my parents worrying about me more than they already are. I feel like I've gotten to a good point in my relationship with my parents recently, but I still don't tell them everything (mostly for Mom's sake because I think she would have a heart attack if I told her some of my stories). So yeah, basically that's why I've been feeling homesick, I think. 

    Also, something that's been weighing on my mind recently is boys. It sounds so stupid, but here I am writing my fucking feelings down. I guess we're just at that level of desperation now. It all started with a boy - let's call him MB. The one that got away (but I never even had him in the first place). 

    --- MB is a whole story that maybe I will write another blog post about someday, but today is not that day. 

I don't know what about him, but he just had some hold over me that made me into an obsessive fangirl. Thinking back on it, I hate the way I literally GLORIFIED him, but he was literally just a boy. He was perfect in my imagination, but I barely even knew him in real life. Anyways, I don't really know why I brought him up - oh, wait. He actually just posted on Instagram today (the nerve), so maybe that's why he's at the forefront of my mind. He got a buzzcut btw. Like he literally couldn't be any more my type!!! Ughhhh, we're backtracking. Ok, now back to the present moment. Boys. The actual story starts on Friday night. Me and like eight other girls were out downtown celebrating our friend Izzy's birthday. Things were a little awkward at first because it was a strange group of people. But as the night went on things became more fun. While we were in line for the most mid freshman bar, we met two boys. One of them immediately started talking to Izzy - good for her, it was her birthday after all. The other one was talking to the rest of us and just being a good wingman for his friend. We walk to other bars and the two boys follow us around everywhere - it's obvious that the one guy is really into Izzy. The other guy starts talking to one of the girls, Sarah. And if you've ever been in a group with guys and girls, then you know whenever there's an uneven number of guys to girls, things get awkward and someone always gets their feelings hurt. Usually, I'm not the kind of girl to get upset about these things. I've prided myself my whole life on being the independent girl who's never needed a boy to feel happy or complete or even to have a good time. And don't get me wrong, I still am that person. That Friday night, I was sad about not being "picked" for maybe half a second, and then I continued to dance like nobody's business on the 9d's dance floor. At the time, just being a girl at a bar was enough for me, but since that night, it's been weighing more heavily on me. Why am I never the girl that gets picked? Is there fundamentally something about me that a guy sees and thinks no? I know in my brain that these are silly questions and that the right guy will love everything about me and all that bullshit, but it's hard until you find that guy. Even later that night when two other guys came up to talk to me, I felt the other "rejections" more than I appreciated the other guys right in front of my face. And even when they were talking to me, all I wanted to do was dance, so what does that mean? I think I maybe just want a dance or karaoke partner? Did I just identify my dream man? Anyways, back to the two other guys. I'm not going to say they were creeps - because they weren't. But they were definitely of legal drinking age and gave me odd (predatory) vibes. So that led me to think -do I scare off normal guys so that the only ones left are weird? I actually have never seen myself white-girl dance so maybe it's my dancing that scares the normies off. But on a more serious note, what about me gives off the vibe that allows weird people to come up and talk to me? These are important questions, because if I'm attracting weirdos, then I might need to buy those drink lid covers. 

    So yeah, I think that's mostly what's been on my mind - homesickness and boys. 

Love, the current version of myself 

[nrc-archives]

Twisted wonderland boys as dads

on a scale from 1-10 how good would they be as fathers. Depending on how people like this post, I may do a version with the NRC staff.

All characters are 18+ for this scenario

btw, these friends helped me with heartslabyul - Rook @mysaldate (the other friend wishes to remain anonymous)

Heartslabyul

Riddle: Riddle has a bit of a short fuse and a desire to control things. That may cause issues due to how hard kids can be to control. On top of that, he is probably terrified that he will turn out like his mother. I think he would be a great loving father but he would probably remain reserved and somewhat afraid to interact with his child from time to time. 6/10

Trey: Trey is practically already a father due to raising his siblings and the dorm for that matter. 10/10

Cater: tries to be a friend more than a dad. wants their friends to think he's cool but just isn't. tbh, he needs to get therapy before getting into a long-term relationship enough to have a kid. probably makes TikTok videos with the baby in the video/in the background. 4/10

Ace: His girlfriend said she was pregnant and he tried to run away. jk but he wouldn't be bad but he wouldn't be the best either. He would be clueless the first few weeks but would adjust. would probably sleep in the same room as the baby for about a week until he realizes he opens his eyes every time the baby makes the tiniest noise. Also, the type of dad where if mom says no he agrees with her. then when she leaves he's like "wanna do it anyway?" 6/10

Deuce: Amazing dad! awkward but trying his best. probably found a way to make chores fun. Sleeps with the baby in the same bed as him (and the mother) for at least 5 years. gets into hobbies with his child so they can talk about the hobbies together. supportive dad. if the kid began to get rebellious, he would sit the kid down and talk to them. he would not scold them. If his daughter likes princessy stuff, he's letting her paint his nails. 10/10

Savanaclaw

Leona: He's a surprisingly good dad. it's true that when his significant other told him she was pregnant he stared at her like "Please tell me you are joking" but when the baby arrives, Leona looks at the baby and makes a vow to protect this child with all he has. He has natural authority but does not abuse it. he can be cold and unaffectionate but he will always be there for the child. 5/10

Ruggie: One of the best dads. He shows this with the neighborhood kids. probably works his ass off to give the child the best life possible. he also would kiss his wife's belly a lot when she was pregnant and put his ear up to her belly as well. 8/10

Jack: Great dad. It shows with how good he is with his siblings. Like Ruggie, he puts his ear up to his wife's belly to listen. Stern yet very loving father. scolds the kid after they do something dumb and almost get hurt but immediately hugs them saying "I'm just glad your ok..." 9/10

Octanvinelle

Azul: While he is ecstatic to be a father and have a beautiful, loving wife, he probably would be too busy to take care of his kid most of the time. It would mostly be Floyd, Jade, and Azul's wife taking care of the child, so long as Floyd and Jade aren't at Azul's restaurant, working for him at that moment. Despite that, He is very protective. If he hears his child is being bullied, he deals with it personally. He is affectionate in private. Meaning only when it's him and his child (and maybe his wife) in the vicinity. Never in front of Jade and Floyd. 5/10

Jade: If his kid ever talked back to him, he would put the fear of God in the child without even taking a step. The kid starts therapy at age 5. Jade is very manipulative so he knows how to get his kid to do what he wants. He would also get the child involved in the family business at a young age. (more tea for the therapist) Obsessively protective. 3/10 (but appears like a 9)

Floyd: Very good with kids. he thinks his kid is an angel but they arent and he does know this but just doesn't care. if the little shit goes and starts a fight, Floyd's child will run to her father and Floyd will probably throw down with a preschooler. Tells his child to finish her dinner, the child refuses, Floyd gets annoyed and makes the scary face, the child makes the face back and continues to refuse, Floyd is proud of his baby. Same with Ace or Cater, he is probably the type to be like "Oh? you're sneaking out to go to a party? can I come? mom fell asleep watching the clamdashians." 7/10

Scarabia

Kalim: He's very affectionate and supportive but also not the most intelligent... After he found out his wife was pregnant, he didn't realize that yes, just a drop is enough to make a baby...Jamil probably yelled at him once or twice for trying to take the newborn on a magic carpet ride...He's trying to be more responsible for his child but it's a work in progress. 3/10

Jamil: I feel like Jamil would be against having children for the sole fact that he doesn't want to bring a baby into the world that has its fate decided for it before it even has a chance to breathe. On the chance that Kalim declares that Jamil's child has the right to choose whether or not they want to work for Kalim's family, he may tho. If Jamil did have a baby, he would be very responsible and probably a bit overbearing. He would also encourage the child to go do other things, especially if the child wanted to help with Jamil's work. 7/10

Pomefiore

Vil: Supportive, loving, but strict. focuses on the child's individuality. he will not raise a slacker tho. "if you want a hobby do it properly. give it your full effort." Would definitely take his kid on all trips with him. 10/10

Rook: I feel like he wouldn't be the best candidate...He is somewhat affectionate but given how he acts, there is a possibility that he could be a bit insensitive about the child's feelings. The child can hunt a deer on their own by age 4 for sure tho... 2/10

Epel: He would be a great father if the child is a boy/is boyish. If the child is a girl/girlish he may be a bit insensitive if the child wants to do girly things with him. However, this does not mean he won't love them unconditionally. Thankfully, he has a village standing behind him and his granny can and WILL call him out if he hurts her great-grandchild, even accidentally. 5/10

Ignihyde

Idia: If he manages to be with a woman long enough to get that far, he is utterly terrified. He has the funds to build a video game-themed nursery but, not only does the thought of being a dad has his anxiety through the roof but the family curse is also another big issue to him. Ortho tries to look up tips for Idia on being a good father and learn more about the pregnancy process to better assist the mother...this is probably how he discovers the parental lock that Idia installed years ago... Idia probably doesn't like the idea of having to put his gaming on hold when the baby cries and Ortho, ngl probably not the best assistant either... 2/10

Ortho: Robot. end of story N/A

Diasomnia

Malleus: Yeah, he may need assistance... He needs an heir so he needs to reproduce but, given that he was raised by Lilia the most, there is a chance he may not be around his kid as much as he'd like...Not because he doesn't want to either. I feel Malleus would love to spend time with his child but, as the ruler of Briar valley, he has essential duties to fulfill. He is very attentive when he is with his child, and his favorite pastime is reading books with the child. He probably does wish to have more time with them though... 6/10

Lilia: Lilia is a canon father...A good one? That's another story that I won't spoil. (He has all positive intentions but he can be a bit clueless) When Lilia learned he would be having his own blood-related child, he was over the moon. He probably really wants a girl since he raised Malleus and Silver. If it's a boy, he will love it all the same but still try again for his elusive daughter. (He will not give up either, especially if he put a ring on the mom's finger...) Unless Silver and the mother step in, Lilia is likely to make all of the same mistakes he made while raising Silver. Of course, Silver doesn't want to see his baby sibling suffer through all the food poisoning so, he tries to stop by the house a few times a week. Sorry Lilia but 4/10

Silver: He is probably average when it comes to being a parent. He would definitely be married before conceiving a child. Regardless of his duties as a knight, one thing he always has to do is be there to tuck his child in at night, even if he has to return to his duties immediately after. He is guilty of falling asleep during the bedtime story though...All planned by his child, of course. His duties cause him to be away for a while but when he is there, he is the most loving father and yes, he credits Lilia for being his example. 8/10

Sebek: did someone say, soccer dad? He is loud and supportive. If it's a sports game, he's yelling the loudest. If it's ballet, he stands up, in tears at the end as he claps and yells "THAT'S MY BABY!!!" 100% embarrassing... He can be a bit strict from time to time but, it's just because he wants his child to be successful. When the child was born, he was ugly crying over how beautiful his baby was. "I cant believe something so obscene can make something so beautiful..." His wife glares and Lilia just comments "Oh, if you think procreation was bad, just wait till you have to change a diaper." 8/10

[millionaireangel]

a simple guide for beginners on how to manifest. <3

what is "manifesting/manifestation":

in simple terms, manifesting is bringing ur desires into existence (but in reality, it's more like remembering that the desires are already yours/true). manifesting is easy, but there is so much to learn abt it - methods, techniques, limiting beliefs, etc. so this post doesn't cover everything. it's just a simple, short guide. i'll go into details in my future posts.

basics.

as i said already, manifesting is simple. you, reading this, can manifest anything instantly and effortlessly. u create ur reality. believe it or not, we manifest every second - the process never stops. so, instead of having doubts, start believing in urself and claim the power u hold.

there are many methods u can use but tbh the only one u rlly need is affirming.

affirmations r like sentences that confirm smth. for example, if ur trying to manifest a glow up, u could say these affirmations (in ur head OR out loud) - i get prettier every second, everyone loves my appearance, i am the most beautiful person in existence, etc. there are also umbrella affirmations that basically cover EVERYTHING, for example - everything works in my favor, my life goes the way i want it to, i always get what i want, etc.

u decide which affirmations to use, u can even think of ur own ones! get creative cuz why not?

anyways, it doesn't matter when u say ur affirmations. just say them whenever u feel like it and try to put feeling in them. try to feel what u would feel if the sentence ur saying was already true. act as if ur desire already came true. believe in ur affs, know they are true. that's literally all u have to do & the desire is yours!

tips and reminders.

i want u to understand that there are no big and small manifestations. manifesting a million dollars and manifesting a slice of pizza are equally easy.

also, if u ever get doubts that ur desire isn't coming true - just switch it with a positive thought. for example, if u think: "what if my manifestations aren't coming true...", immediately forget abt that thought and tell urself: "i manifest instantly, like wow! i am such a powerful manifestor, i always get what i want!" and that's it. dw, negative thoughts don't affect u. convince ur mind that u always get u want, duh.

don't obsess. the desires r already here, why r u still obsessing over them?

DON'T PAY MUCH ATTENTION TO THE OUTER WORLD - the 3D. the outer world is a reflection of ur inner world so it MUST always reflect ur thoughts. if it doesn't, just ignore that mf and continue affirming. it will give u what u want eventually.

persist. this is a bit debatable, since ur a powerful manifestor and u won't need to persist for days and even weeks cuz u get any desire instantly BUT still, if u don't see the results in the 3d, as i said, just continue affirming and u'll get them rlly soon.

don't limit urself. there are many limiting beliefs that stop u from getting ur desires right now. switch them off, forget abt them. realize that nothing can stop u from getting ur wishes NOW.

remember that there are no rules when it comes to manifesting. yes, i listed these tips and reminders to help you/guide you, but the one in control is you. u create the rules. manifest however u'd like, it's all up to u. whatever u believe in is true in ur reality.

conclusion.

that's all for today, thanks for attention <3. btw, as i mentioned already, there are many fun things to learn abt manifesting, so this is just a short guide. i will try my best to post useful info often & one more thing - feel free to ask me questions. i'm here to help u on ur manifestation journey. mwah.

[mayfriend-archive]

Totally understand if you're not up for it and fully recognize the ronald mcdonald dom/sub anon vibes which is an AMAZING post btw but like...now i'm curious, what the hell did Lord of the Flies anon DO that got him blocked for the discourse? like...i just can't wrap my head around high school lit being...uh...that inflammatory i guess?

Okay so, I'll start by saying I've had a new anon from apparently the same anon saying they are NOT the person I blocked, just a rando making the same points, but I'll answer your question anyway just to set out why this person in particular got blocked, out of the several thousand who reblogged/commented on that very successful addition to the LoTF post I made.

First off, I added the 'real life Lord of the Flies' story because I thought it was a good story. I had read about it only a couple days beforehand in Humankind and, after reading out the entire chapter to my parents who weren't very interested, I was excited that there was not only a post where it would be relevant to post, but that I wouldn't be hijacking it, as it was already rejecting the widespread interpretation taught in many schools, that humanity is inherently savage.

When making the addition, I a) did not think it would get more than a couple reblogs, because the post was already at 50k notes and I figured anyone that might be interested would already have seen it, and b) I did not know the very specific context that prompted William Golding to write the book; all I knew was that he had been a teacher at a public school (basically, the poshest schools in the country - think Eton, Harrow, very 'old money' places that pump out Conservative politicians by the bucket-load 🤢) who hated his job and the boys he taught (which, valid), and new information I'd been given in Humankind - that Golding had said to his wife one day, "Wouldn't it be a good idea to write a story about some boys on an island, showing how they would really behave?" - which had no mention of The Coral Island by R. M. Ballantyne, which I have since learned was the text that Golding loathed enough to write an entire novel in refutation of - and included what I considered a very telling letter from Golding to his publisher, in which Golding wrote of his belief that 'even if we start with a clean slate, our nature compels us to make a muck of it.' Another Golding quote that I believe portrays his belief in humanity's 'innate savagery' is that "man produces evil as a bee produces honey."

Obviously, the author of a book putting forward the case for humanity's inherent goodness was going to oppose Golding's hypothesis; Bregman not only noted Golding's literary accomplishments and beliefs, but his personal life.

When I began delving into the author's life, I learned what an unhappy individual he'd been. An alcoholic. Prone to depression. A man who, as a teacher, once divided his pupils into gangs and encouraged them to attack each other. "I have always understood the Nazis," Golding confessed, "because I am of that sort by nature." (Humankind by Rutger Bregman, p. 24-25)

I have bolded the part about him as a teacher, because it is incredibly relevant to the original post that I commented on, which begins with a comic of a teacher locking her class in to see them 'recreate' Lord of the Flies, something which the follow up comments before mine staunchly reject as both misunderstanding the point of the book, and the fact that it took the kids in Lord of the Flies a significant amount of time without adult supervision to go 'savage'. This misreading of the text is widespread enough that when Golding won the Nobel Prize for Lord of the Flies, the Swedish Nobel committee wrote that his book 'illuminate[s] the human condition in the world of today'. Whether or not they misread it is beyond my expertise - they do at least mention the factors of the outside world neglected by many when analysing the book, but still seem to believe it says something about human nature as a whole rather than just, to quote thedarkbutbeige 'British kids being rat bastards' - but Golding quite happily took his Nobel prize on this basis. Which, in fairness, I would too. It's a fucking Nobel prize.

It was with this knowledge, and this knowledge alone, that I stated in my now very, very widely read comment that Golding 'wrote the book to be a dick', in response to the tags of the person I reblogged from. As I said, I now know that Golding did not write the book (solely) because he hated the kids he taught, but as a response to The Coral Island and the general idea that clearly the British were inherently civilsed, whilst the people they colonised and enslaved were inherently savage. So. That's the background.

The anon - or rather, the person I thought was anon - was the sole exception out of dozens of replies, who instead of telling me about The Coral Island politely decided it was time to go ALL CAPS and regurgitate points already made by thespaceshipoftheseus, and implied that the only reason that the real life Tongan castaways didn't go all Lord of the Flies was because they weren't British. Not because they weren't surrounded by violence like the boys in Lord of the Flies, or there wasn't a World War ongoing, or that they weren't the upper, upper, upper crust of a class-obsessed society like Britain - but because they weren't British. A complete inversion of the concept that Golding was trying to get across - now, instead of all of humanity being equally prone to savagery in the right conditions, it was solely nationality that determined it. As in, the British were inherently savage, but nobody else was.

I, trying for humour, made the terrible mistake of replying to them.

I won't lie, I was absolutely blown away that this was real life. What I think they were trying to do was be that Cool Tumblr Person who, after somebody's been shitty on a post, goes to their blog and sees something Damning in their about/description. In an ideal world, I imagine I'd have gone nuts or done something Unforgiveable. In what I can only call the rant that followed, they stated several times that I needed to go back to high school to get some 'proper literary analysis' skills and that the story of the Tongan castaways was completely unrelated to the point at hand which. I mean, I disagree, considering that I made the addition, but I couldn't get my head around how commenting on a post that was already rejecting the thesis that the 'point' of Lord of the Flies was that humanity was inherently savage and was, in fact, about how kids - British or otherwise - learn how to function from the adults around them, and that traumatised, terrified children aren't going to create a mini-Utopia, and put forward a real life example of how without the key additions of an ongoing world war, a colonial Empire and the subsequent mindset of thinking you are 'inherently civilised' and therefore can't do anything wrong, actually, people just want to take care of each other.

A friend has since asked me why I even have 'england' in my description. To be honest, it's a timezone thing - I talk to a lot of people online who don't share my timezone, and it generally makes me feel like if I don't reply immediately because it's 3am, they have the tools to see that I'm not in their timezone and not just ignoring them. I did consider changing it to 'british' or 'uk' after it was... 'used against me', I guess, simply because I didn't want to deal with it, but you know what. No. Not gonna do that. I am from England, and I have never hid that fact. I have a tag called 'uk politics', during Eurovision I refer to the UK's act as 'us' (even if I really, really don't want to. Because James Newman slaughtered that song and it was downright embarrassing), I regularly post stuff in my personal tag about where I live (and mostly complain about this piece of shit government). If people really think my nationality makes every point I make null and void, then they don't have to follow me or interact with my posts; tumblr is big, and I am one medium-small blog very easily passed over.

I did reply to them, trying to explain the above, but their next response really just doubled down. Because I used the word British instead of English - foolishly because the posts above mine focused on Britishness, and also because although Golding was English and taught English kids, the pro-Imperialism author of The Coral Island, R. M. Bannatyne was actually Scottish so, ding ding ding, falls into the 'British' category - they then decided that I was somehow trying to pretend I wasn't English and made all the same points, before ending with this doozy:

At this point, I knew there was nothing to be gained from replying, because if we're whipping out conditions like they're pokemon cards then there's no actual conversation anymore, and I'm not going to start mudslinging like an identity politician. They made up their mind, and I figured there could be no harm in letting them think that they 'won' by blocking them instead of replying.

Until the ask. INNATE ENGLISH SAVAGERY did, I'll admit, make me think it was them, back again. I even thought up a really good response approximately 12 hours after I replied, I was that sure. Until the second message came in, and said they were just someone who came from the post and made the same point by chance. So the saga draws to a close... for now.

It may have been them, it may not have been - the anon feature makes it impossible to be sure, but as the second message I got said, we're in a heatwave. It's too hot to argue. And I've just written a goddamn essay about a book I dislike anyway.

My pasty English ass is going to go melt. If there's Disk Horse, do not tell me. I am Done™