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loveluvrs · 1 month

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she's my pretty girl l lando norris x reader

request/summary – AHH HI MARYAM!!! it's shelbi:) i NEED a lando fic where he takes reader to the paddock for the first time and EVERYONE sees they totally like each other (but they complete oblivious idiots) — 🌟

author's notes – i loved writing this one!!! thank you to bff @keerysfreckles for the wonderful req <33 ALSO LANDO SPRINT POLE WOOOOO!!!!!

My fingers hover over the send button. I sigh as I delete the message again. Lan, I don’t know if I can. There’s gonna be so many cameras and so many people and you know people will think we’re dating for sure, I text my best friend Lando.

Come on, pretty girl, I’ll be right there with you the whole time. I promise, he texts back.

:(( come over tonight for movie night and we’ll talk about it, I text as I felt the anxiety already growing in me.

Lando helps me set up movie night. Popcorn bowl in hand, I slot myself next to Lando, our hips touching as I slightly lean into him, placing the bowl in between us. “Time to talk?” He asks expectantly. I groan. “Oh come on, let me at least distract myself for a little bit before we start this headache of a discussion again,” I say as I scrunch up my face in playful annoyance. Lando laughs at this, placing a small kiss on the tip of my nose as he says, “okay miss dramatic.”

I pout. “Lan, you know how my anxiety gets. And that’s just in general. With all those cameras on me? I mean, it’s gonna be suffocating,” I say with a nervous gulp. Just thinking about all the attention made me anxious.

He puts on a soft smile. “I know, pretty girl. You don’t have to come if you don’t want to. I just know you’ve been really wanting to go to a race, and I thought what better time than here in Silverstone so you don’t have to take any extra flights? But really, I won’t make you go unless you’re comfortable with it, alright?” He says softly with 100% focus and attention and determination in his voice. That was one thing I could always count on; if I was feeling anxious about something, no matter how small, Lando would be there to take me seriously and comfort me through it.

“I want to be there for you, you know I do,” I say softly with a frown, “there’s nothing I want to do more than support my best friend, my favorite person, at his home race.”

“Pretty pretty girl, you don’t need to explain yourself to me. I understand, okay? And I won’t think anything less of you based on whether or not you come. I’ll still love you all the same,” he says softly as he puts my hand in his and squeezes it to comfort me.

——

The next morning, I showed up to the paddock a little late, since I had to curb an oncoming anxiety attack in the morning. I also hadn’t told Lando that I was going to be coming, so I had no idea where to go. By the time I reached, Lando was already in the car for the first practice session.

After the practice session was over, Lando stalked back into the Mclaren garage, talking with his race engineer about some of the data they picked up. He stops in his tracks when he sees me and immediately engulfs me in a hug. His hands wrap around my waist and my arms wrap around his neck.

“Hey! I didn’t know you decided to come?” He says with his signature bright smile as he held me close. I hum. “I was just a bit late in the morning, sorry about that,” I say softly. “Nothing to be sorry about, pretty girl,” he says softly as he places a soft kiss on the top of my head before letting me go.

Since that moment, unless he was in a team meeting or in the car, Lando stayed attached by the hip to you. You couldn’t decide if it was comforting or overwhelming, to be honest. On one hand, he made sure to be there so he could explain everything to you and introduce you to everyone, and whisk you away when he felt like it was getting all too much for you. On the other hand, his presence meant a herd of cameras would almost surely follow my every move if I was with him.

Oscar, for one, got a bit tired of the fact that every time he saw his teammate, Lando was too busy making heart eyes at you to even think about anything else. “Why don’t you just admit you’re madly in love with her?” He asks Lando with an exasperated sigh after the two of them are walking back from a media briefing.

“She knows I love her,” Lando says casually. Oscar rolls his eyes and scoffs at the response. “Okay she knows you love her, but she doesn’t know you’re in love with her,” he explains. Lando gives Oscar a confused look. “Mate, you’ve just said the same thing twice,” he says as his eyes begin to scan the crowd for you. Oscar groans before walking off in frustration, wondering when on Earth these two idiots were gonna realize they’re both in love with each other.

Later that evening, Lando and I walk into his hotel room after he was done with everything for the day. I lay down in the bed immediately, exhausted from all the socializing I had to do all day. Lando laughs at this, “sleepyhead,” he teases in a murmur. He takes a quick shower and changes into a comfy hoodie and sweats before coming back and laying on the bed next to me. I’m sat watching some spy movie on the tv. He tilts his head at the tv, “what’re you watching?” He asks curiously.

“Honestly, no idea,” I say with a giggle, “I just saw that Theo James was in it so I had to watch.” Lando settles into bed as we watch. Eventually, he finds my gaze on him and his lap, which was clearly not as subtle as I wanted it to be. He nudges me playfully with his elbow. “C’mere,” he says softly as he pats his lap. I, who was clearly in my own thoughts, seemed to wake up out of my trance. “Huh?” I ask in confusion. He holds his arms wide for me, “come here and cuddle,” he says softly.

I waste no time before doing as he says, laying in between his legs, my back to his chest. His arms wrap around my waist and he places a soft kiss on my head. I hum in content as I relax into him. Lando always knew when I needed some physical affection, which was useful because there was nothing I hated more than having to ask for some love. “I love you,” he whispers as his face burrows into my neck, placing a kiss there. I’m about to respond when Oscar suddenly enters the room. “Hey mate, have you seen my- uh. Sorry, am I interrupting something here?” He asks as his eyes dart between Lando and I, and the extremely close position we seem to be in.

“Nope! Just cuddling. What’s up?” Lando asks nonchalantly. Oscar’s eyebrows raise at Lando’s answer. “You know what, never mind, I think I know where I’ve left it,” he says as he slowly backs out of the room.

“What was that all about?” I ask in confusion. “Hmm, who knows, he’s been acting weird all day,” Lando says as he resumes placing kisses on my neck and shoulder. “I love you,” he repeats again in a gentle tone. I hum. “I love you too,” I say softly. “I’m so insanely happy you decided to come to the paddock today, honestly,” he says in a quiet yet soft murmur, “don’t think I could be any happier than having my pretty girl with me.” “Why are you trying to flatter me?” I tease him with a giggle. He scoffs, “sorry. Didn’t know I couldn’t be nice to my best friend,” he retorts playfully.

We go out for dinner an hour later with Oscar and Lily. I instinctively sat next to Lando as usual. I’m scrolling through Twitter while we wait for our food when I feel Lando’s hand intertwine with mine. I think nothing of it, but see Oscar and Lily exchange a glance towards each other.

“You owe me 5 pounds,” Oscar whispered in a hushed voice to Lily with a sassy smile tugging on his lips. “No, you said 5 pounds for the heart eyes,” Lily whispers back defensively. “Oh come on, that’s basically the same thing! It’ll happen in a few minutes anyways,” Oscar whispers playfully. “I so badly wanted us to be proven wrong and for something to happen,” Lily says quietly to Oscar in a sympathetic voice. “They’re both idiots, I don’t think either of them will figure it out,” he says with a laugh.

The laugh catches both Lando and I’s attention as we look up from our phones. “Hmm? Did you two say anything to us?” Lando asks curiously. “Oh, uh no. Don’t worry about it,” Oscar says with an embarrassed smile. The rest of the night goes by with hushed remarks from Oscar every once in a while every time Lando does something like giving me some of his own dish since my portion size was small, or when he asks if I’m okay after I drop the fork under the table and hit my head on the table when I try sitting back up, or when he just simply listens to me like I’m the only person in the room.

——

“You’ve been staring at her for five minutes now,” Oscar says as Lando stares at you from across the paddock as you talk to Lewis. “Shut up,” Lando mutters as he tries to sound annoyed by utterly fails because he could never be annoyed while you were in his line of sight.

I walk up to him a minute later, a bright smile on my face. “Guess what!” I say excitedly as Lando’s hand instinctively wraps around my waist. He hums. “Tell me what’s got you all happy, pretty girl,” he says with a soft smile.

“Lewis said that he’d take me out tonight to visit that new café I was telling you about, remember?” I say excitedly. Lando immediately frowns. “Lewis? Why didn’t you ask me to take you there?” He asks as he tries to not let his jealousy show. “Well I know you aren’t really into that type of thing, I looked at the menu and you wouldn’t have eaten anything there,” I say casually.

“Well still. I don’t care. I’m coming with,” Lando said with a tone of finality. Suddenly Oscar started speaking. “Guys did you know theres a new movie coming out with Zendaya? The Jealous Man?” He says with a look towards Lando. Lando took the hint with an unamused expression on his face. “You know what? I think I’ve got a team thing tonight, so I’ll have to skip out. Sorry pretty girl, but have fun with Lewis, hmm?” He says softly. “You sure? We can wait for you if you want,” I say softly, not wanting Lando to miss out if he wanted to go. Lando shakes his head. “Nah nah nah, even if you wait, I’d be far too tired later,” I says as he takes my hand in his.

——

Lando sat staring at his phone while he sits in his hotel room’s bed. He had tried everything to keep him occupied; working out, eating, the sim, talking to Oscar, facetiming Max, but nothing could keep his mind off of the thought of you and Lewis together. He groans as he caves in, texting you.

pretty girlllllllllll, where are you? I miss you :(, he texts with clear desperation in his text.

hi! Lewis and I are gonna go for a walk on the beach before heading back. Is that okay? I text, not wanting him to feel too lonely while I was gone.

Lando sighed at my message. yeah don’t worry, pretty girl, have fun, he texts back, I love you.

When I finally get back to the hotel, I’m exhausted. I kick off my shoes to find Lando already asleep. I get changed into some sweats and lie next to him. “Lan?” I whisper softly, “‘m sorry I was late, I know you missed me.” I sighed when I got no reply back, so I simply scooted towards him, my arms wrapping around him from behind. “I love you,” I whispered into the dark. I heard a slight grumble afterwards. “Love you too,” came a murmur from Lando.

The next morning I met Lando and Oscar at the paddock before qualifying, but Lando seemed a bit distant. So I went up to him while he was talking to Oscar

“Are you mad I went out to spend time with Lewis instead of you last night?” I ask Lando in a quiet voice with a frown on my face.

Lando turned around to face me. “Oh, pretty girl, I could never be mad at you,” he says as his voice softens, “I love you. Just missed you, that’s all.” “You’ve been ignoring me this whole morning,” I say as my frown deepens. His entire body deflates at the sight of your frown. “No no no, I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to. Sorry if it felt like that,” he says softly as his hands wrap around my waist to give me a hug. “Love you,” he murmurs into my hair, “I promise.”

Oscar rolls his eyes at the scene with an amused laugh. “Heart eyes, five pounds,” he mouths behind Lando, knowing that Lando would have melted the second you came into view.

“God, these two will stay idiots forever,” Oscar muttered under his breath with a laugh as he looked at the very obviously love-stricken pair in front of him.

#lando norris x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris oneshot #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic

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sukunas-wife · 4 months

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Sealed 6

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / I did it 🥺🤍

As much as I’d like to wait til tomorrow and say “happy valentines💌” I haven’t been feeding anyone so here’s a little chapter 🤍 Happy Early Valentines

It was a warp of black and red you were all too familiar with, Sukuna kicked his leg up crossing it over before pulling you down into his lap. He had a smug smile when he leaned his head against his hand staring down at Yuji. Yuji was standing at the base of skulls looking up in disbelief, WHY WAS THAT EVIL MAN TOUCHING YOU SO CASUALLY?! He HAD TO BE HOLDING YOU HOSTAGE!!

“LET HER GO!” You watched Sukuna’s face become more malicious when Yuji started trying to climb up the base. You tried to stand up only for Sukuna to lightly press his nails into your side holding you against him, you looked at him and he faltered with a look of confusion. “Sukun-MOM-WHAT?!” Sukuna’s look of confusion changed to disbelief, “YOU HAVE A SON WOMAN?!” You had half a nerve to smack him in the back of the head, “WE.” He shook his head “woah woah woah- Lady- this brat is fifteen, I’ve been sealed away for centuries don’t you think for a damn minute you're going to make me believe fifteen years ago I- '' Yuji stared eyes wide when he made it up. He had just watched you punch the king of curses over the head to the point he was left in shock. “LISTEN. TO. ME. RY. OMEN. SU. KU. NA.” “DOMAIN EXPAN-Domain Expansion!” You were quick to cancel out his malevolent shrine with your own domain. “That’s not my son.” “THAT THAT IS A HE AND HE-“ You were cut off by Yuji running from behind you trying to land a punch on Sukuna. Sukuna didn't move or hesitate. He knew your domain all too well, if anything this was going to hurt Yuji more than him. Yuji was proud he was going to land a hit until it felt like he hit a wall was thrown back, “Yuji please, you can't do that here…” you gave a sympathetic but sweet smile while he held his hand that was in pain, “This is my domain, forms of physical violence and cursed technique aren’t allowed. Any attacks made are inflicted back onto the caster.” He looked even more confused, all you could do was place a hand on his head, “Just talk okay?” He nodded, still eying Sukuna from behind you and over your shoulder.

You turned back to Sukuna, he was looking away bored eyes closed, arms crossed over his chest and tucked into his sleeves, his body was turned away so his side was facing you. “…Sukuna…” he turned his head away dramatically. “Ryomen.” He turned his back to you. You sighed, feeling Yuji rest his chin on your shoulder, “What’s with this guy?” “Ryo, cmon.” He turned his head, opening one eye to look at you. He reminded you of that stubborn tiger cub he brought home one day that climbed to sit on the highest shelf in your room. It gave you that same look when you called it. Sukuna wasn’t too far off you could see the imaginary tail and ears flicking around. “What is it, woman.” It wasn’t a question, you stayed quiet, maybe you should explain to Yuji first, but imagining telling Yuji that’s his dad without explaining to Sukuna first? There was no doubt he’d let them both die.

”Sukuna I need to explain something very important to you so I need you to really listen to me.” “What could you have to explain to him?” Yuji was asking incredulously. “Yuji, you need to listen closely please. After I explain to him I need to explain to you also.” There was a sinking feeling in Yuji’s stomach when he saw how serious you were about this situation. He nodded with a straight face, he would be quiet just to listen.

Sukuna was still looking at you from over his shoulder, “I’m listening.”

”That day you were sealed away, I made a binding vow with our son- YOUR SON?! Yuji please.” You looked at him and he pouted quieting down, Sukuna did not look amused, “I made a binding vow with our son and the vow was never actively broken. That day you saw how they separated HIM,” you tried to motion with your eyes and face without making it obvious, “from us and used that technique to separate him in time, and while you were sealed away I managed to be freed from the realm and track everything down to the right moment with the help of Morinozuka. The only thing that surprised me is that you were able to manifest in the only person in this world I would’ve begged you not too.”

Sukuna’s face was void of emotion watching you, “Prove it to me.” You reached back, putting your hand on Yuji’s upper back pulling him forward with you. You took his arm, pushing up his sleeve, showing the birthmark he had gotten used to seeing, before pushing up your own sleeve showing the exact same mark, “Is this proof enough or do you want a blood test also?” “I want a bloo-I WAS BEING SARCASTIC” You snapped at him and he gave you a look, you turned to Yuji who you assumed would’ve been more dramatic, was just staring at Sukuna, his mouth was open slightly lost in thought, you watched his eyes move quickly side to side as if searching for something, here or in his memory you weren’t sure.

“…I.. I thought this was a birthmark and you just liked wearing long sleeve shirts…” his voice was a whisper when he looked at you, his eyes held a sadness, “I can't believe this it doesn’t make sense, that’s not my dad and your not my mom this doesn’t make any sense. This.. this mark isn’t anything it's just it's just a..” he trailed off and you heard his laboured breathing eyes tearing up, around his eyes, nose and cheeks started to tint ready when you watched tears slowly start to well. You reached out trying to comfort him, he shook his head no trying to step back , “no” his voice was a cracked whisper, your heart ached “my.. my mom had.. had black hair I …” he swallowed, shaking his head no aggressively, his hands were shaky fists by his side. His body shook when he clenched his jaw, tears streaming down his face. You stepped closer and he didnt move, Sukuna watched you, his eyes moving between you and Yuji, the way you reached out to take the brats fist. It had a bead of blood from how tightly he was clenching his fists. The way you held it yours, your other hand slowly opening his fist. The crescent marks in his palm bleeding, your fingertips growling when you trailed your hand over the small wounds. “Yuji..” your soft voice, he hadn’t heard it in centuries, but he saw it.

It was clear and vivid, the memory played out, his son was 3 running around in the snow. You were standing out there tucked into his side, he had two arms around you, the other two were free, one was holding the coat his son had thrown off saying he was hot from running around, the other was free. He squeezed you into his side feeling you shiver in the gust of cold air, your cold hands on his bare chest meant nothing. He turned to look at you, you looked so tired resting your head against his chest. That was until you both snapped to look at Yuji when you heard his sudden cry. The spot of crimson on the snow, his reddened face, the way you both rushed to him, you knelt checking him all over before he used one small chubby fist to wipe his eyes holding out the other to you. His open shaky hand, you held it in yours, “aw my little prince got hurt.” Your fingertips just over the wound, you used your reverse cursed technique to fix him up before he hugged you still sniffling. You picked him up kissing his head and rubbing his back, he saw Sukuna and made grabby hands, “wan daddy.” Sukuna took him without hesitating holding him to one side, his little head fell against his dad’s shoulder while he sniffled hot tears still falling down his cheeks, “don’t cry Yuji we’re going to show that damn shrub who’s really the strongest here.” Yuji nodded his head watching his dad hold up his hand, before the shrub he tried to break a stick off of combust into flames burning to nothing and melting the snow. Yuji smiled nodding his head, you sighed, shaking your head with a small smile when you watched how Sukuna whispered to Yuji about how there would be nothing in this world that could hurt him once he grew up to be big and strong like his dad. Yuji laughed, agreeing with him…”

Sukuna swallowed once he came back in from his memory, his throat felt tight and there was a burning in his chest. You looked just the same, only now that brat was older, weak and nowhere near being strong. He felt his eye twitch, “Hey brat.” You both turned to look at Sukuna, “Let’s make a deal.”

——————

“Y/n…” you blinked, shaking your head, trying to regain complete consciousness, your hand was still on Yuji only now Gojo Satoru was shaking you, “Is something wrong?” You looked at Yuji’s face, you pulled your hand away from his body. “No- I mean yes, don’t you see he's dead.” It was a lie, you knew any second now Yuji would be waking up. There was no way in hell the two had really come to such a strange agreement. The mark on Yuji’s arm was gone, even if he denied it, a part of him really did accept that both you and Sukuna were his parents. You’d have to send more to your home to bring some things to really ground that belief. You turned to Gojo, he was staring down at you. You felt a cold chill run up your spine, you walked past him, he watched you, in his mind you were in shock and denial. Your actions were too calm, a complete 180 from how you first entered the room. He watched how you made it to the wall where he was sitting, letting your head fall against the wall, your shoulders fell, in your mind you were processing everything that felt like hours in Sukuna’s existence, when in reality it had only been minutes. Being in his soul would never fail to make your head hurt figuratively, slowly you knocked your head against the wall one good time.

You heard Yuji, “woah! Full frontal.” You snapped your head around to see him sitting there. You watched him handshake with Gojo smiling, he let go and he saw you, bright eyed and big smile “mom.”

My little shop <3 Use “SUKUNATION” for 15% off 🤍

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pretty--in--purple · 2 months

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Okay I’m awake again and something that really stood out to me with TSC was how different jean and neil are as protagonists. I expected they would be, but the thing I really noticed was how distinct their reactions were.

So, these books are HEAVY. There are many many traumatic events and the characters spend a lot of time in high-stress situations. Even when they’re not being attacked or threatened or XYZ, they’re often in a state of heightened physiological arousal (their sympathetic nervous system is going haywire). As a psychologist, the thing I find really interesting is that we see very different reactions that are all aligned with different adrenal responses, and I wanted to talk about it.

As a baseline, when your sympathetic nervous system is activated, you typically experience what some psychologists call the four Fs. Fight, flight, freeze, and/or fawn (some people use another word here but I don’t like it and think it’s less accurate to the situation). These can occur simultaneously or alone. And of the four characters who are most showing this response are the ones who are consistently in the highest stress situations, but who are also traumatised in such a way that even when they’re not actively in danger their sympathetic nervous system is overreactive and heightened.

So first off, we have Neil. He’s pretty clearly shown to have two responses: flight and fight. For his entire childhood, he’s been fleeing from danger and in the earlier parts of AFTG, we see this response - he tries to run as far as he can possibly get from anything that might be a risk. As a side point, this is pretty clearly a learned response from his mother. As Neil begins to feel more secure and his flight response is impeded (he can’t run away) we see the emergence of his other primary adrenal response - fight. I don’t feel like I need to explain this one, tbh, we’ve all seen how he runs his mouth. Fight is also typically shown when you believe you can defeat whatever’s threatening you, so I love what this says about how his confidence develops across the trilogy.

Then you have Andrew. He’s not a POV protagonist but I feel like his response might be the most obvious. His primary responses are fight and freeze (Andrew Minyard runs from/fawns for no man). Fight is pretty obvious - he’s a very violent person - but I feel like the most clear example of this is stopping Riko from attacking Neil. Andrew is obviously wired and his instinctive response is to protect. I love that for him. His other primary response, unfortunately, is freeze. Based on the most obvious time we see it (during Drake's attack), this is probably a response he developed as a child, before he felt strong/safe enough to fight back. God, these books make me sad sometimes.

Next is Kevin. He has a slightly more varied response - i can see the argument for him freezing, although i wouldnt say it's a primary response - but his main two responses are fight and fawn. Fight isn't necessarily literal, btw - the most obvious example is covering his tattoo. His fawn response is slightly more expanded on in TSC (mild spoilers if you haven't read that yet) when we see him responding to Riko's attack by begging first Riko and then Jean to intercede and stop the violence. he's trying to appeal to their affection for him, which is absolutely heartbreaking. Kevin i love you.

And finally, we have Jean, whose primary responses are only really made clear in TSC, although they are backed up by his appearances in the trilogy - freeze and fawn. We see freezing in Jean's response to sympathetic nervous system arousal, often from hearing about or recalling upsetting events/information. He closes in on himself and becomes unresponsive. Fawn is slightly more complicated, as we see it somewhat throughout AFTG. when he's loyal to riko and doing things he thinks riko will like in hopes of reducing any potential pain/threat he will experience, i'd call that fawning. an example at usc is him getting on his knees and handing coach rhemann his racket - he's not just submitting to punishment, he's trying to be helpful and well-behaved in hopes of lessening it. it's honestly a really strong response from him and it absolutely breaks my heart. jean in tsc is really struggling and i hope the last book brings him some peace. i also find it really painful that he's the only one of these boys without a fight response - he's never felt capable of winning against his abusers. i really hope the trojans and bee are able to help change that.

#tsc meta #tsc #tsc spoilers #the sunshine court #the sunshine court spoilers #aftg meta #aftg spoilers #neil josten #andrew minyard #kevin day #jean moreau #sky (the blogger) originals

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panic-in-the-multiverse · 11 months

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Reunion

Pairings: Daryl Dixon x teen!reader, Tyreese Williams x teen!reader, Carol Peletier x teen!reader, Judith Grimes x teen!reader (all platonic obviously)

Requested by Anonymous: when the prison fell you and Daryl got separated, this is how you meet up, based on this request

Warnings: mention of blood, fighting, mention killing walkers/zombies, killing people, Daryl hug (yes that’s a warning), knives, guns, mention of killing kids, Terminus, hopefully if you read this you’ve seen the episode and knows what it includes, but ya know typical twd stuff.

A/N did I accidentally write this way longer than I intended yes, yes, I did, now don’t get me wrong the moment where Tyreese defends Judith is iconic but for the sake of this fic I changed it up, kinda wanna make another part

For you who wants to know the episode is season 5 episode 1

Anyway I hope you enjoy this <3

Judith giggled happily in your arms as you walked on the edge of the railway. You could’ve once imagined all kinds of trains going up and down the tracks as they blew past the trees, but now you couldn’t actually remember much about trains, you had the idea of them but not much details (and if a train were to come right now that would’ve been a miracle).

Tyreese walked a few steps behind you, with Carol in the front, as she led your group of four forward. She came to a stop when a sign that states “TERMINUS” showed up once more. It was your headed path, the sanctuary called Terminus. You personally didn’t trust it, not after the Governor, but you had to find Daryl and the rest of the group. You knew that if any of them were still alive they would’ve gone to Terminus after finding the railway. Which all of them had probably done. Along with finding Daryl you also had to get Tyreese and Judith to safety. Tyreese wasn’t fit to live on the road at the moment, he refused to kill anything that came your way leaving you and Carol to kill stray walkers, or animals for food. Judith, well, she was a baby and sometimes could be screaming all day, she was mostly quiet but the times she did cry was the times walkers got attracted. A baby was no way near fit to be on the road but here you were all of you somehow still alive (except for Lizzie and Mika Samuels, but there was no loss for you over Lizzie that’s for sure).

“We’re close” Carol stated as she saw the sign. “I’m gonna get you all there, make sure you’re safe, but I’m not gonna stay” She saw your face morph into disappointment as you nodded your head, a sad smile on your face. You’d missed her while she was gone and now she would be leaving again, and you didn’t like it, not one bit and you knew Daryl would be sad over it too which didn’t help the matter.

As you heard the rustle of leaves behind you in the forest, you all turned around to see two walkers stalk forward in your direction. Tyreese motioned with his hands to take Judith from you. Judith was carefully switched over to Tyreese and both you and Carol went forward to the walkers. Both of you killed them quickly only to notice the herd that was about to come out of the forest. Carol whispered to Tyreese that more were coming, and so all of you went into the opposite side of the railway. You hid in the forest until the walkers got distracted by shots firing not too far away from all of you.

Tyreese looked worriedly at you as he started to talk. “That gunfire it could’ve been from Terminus”

“Someone was attacking them, or they were attacking someone” Carol responded

“Do we want to find out?”

This time you involved yourself in the conversation, as you believed that you did indeed need to find out. “Yeah, we need to find out, If the others are there they might need help”

With that, and Carol's instruction of walking another track that would get you there as well you all started to walk once more, this time in need to find out the truth.

Your next stop had been outside a small worn out cabin, but it wasn’t the cabin that got your attention. What got your solely attention as you hid in the forest with your companions was the man that talked in a walkie-talkie. He was putting up a bunch of fireworks, no doubt to lead the herd of walkers away from Terminus. You could faintly hear him mention a woman with a sword, and you stopped Carol from going forward. As you continued to listen you heard him mention a kid with a hat and that was all you needed to go on. You didn’t think there were that many women with a sword and kid with a hat together nearby at the same time, so it didn’t take much to know that they were talking about Michonne and Carl. Nor did it take long to realize they had done something to your group, thereby also Daryl. Especially when he mentioned bleeding the kid out.

Carol slowly started to creep up behind the man and you followed not far behind. Tyreese more hesitant but still following. She put her gun toward his head, the young man froze and put his hands up still holding the two way radio. “Keep your finger off the button and drop it”

“Listen, ya’ll don’t have to do this. Whatever you want, we got a place where everyone’s welcome”

“Shut up man” it was what all three of you were thinking but Tyreese was the one to say it.

“Okay”

“We’re friends of the chick with the sword and the kid in the hat” Carol pressed the gun against his head forward, making the man lean forward as the gun touched his head.

It didn’t take long for you and Carol to tie him up and drag him (not so carefully) into the cabin leaning him against one of the walls. Throughout the whole ordeal the man continued to tell the three of you that you didn’t have to do this, that you could all come up with a deal, but he had no luck there.

As Carol made herself ready to scout Terminus out to see what was happening Tyreese continued to hold Judith in a protective embrace. You however had been asking the man questions, finding out that ever since the first questions he had been lying. He told you he only had Carl and Michonne, that they had both attacked them out of nowhere, that they were just protecting themselves. But none of you believed him. Not with the things you heard him talk about before you confronted him.

You would of followed Carol to Terminus had it not been for your will to protect Judith and Tyreese. As much as you loved Tyreese he wasn’t in his right mind. So you stayed to help if anything bad were to happen, to walkers coming your way or your prisoner getting free somehow, it didn’t matter you were there to protect your family. You only hoped Carol wouldn’t need any help.

Talking about your prisoner he was even more shatty when Carol left. Apparently a teenager, a baby and a man who he could clearly see wasn’t going to kill him was no threat to him. It was his undoing in the end. He underestimated you both and it showed in the way he talked to you and Tyreese as you sat by Judith, who’d you made a makeshift bed to.

“She got a name?… Hey, she got a name?”

“No” you answered at the same time Tyreese answered “Judith” you glared at Tyreese as he told the stranger her name, you didn’t want to give him any information, you never knew if it would backfire.

“She your daughter or something?”

“She’s a friend”

“Huh, I don’t have any friends… I mean I know people. They’re just assholes I stay alive with. The other one your friend, the woman” the younger man nodded towards the door that was now closed. Tyreese slowly looked away at the comment being conflicted about his answer. So instead you answered.

“Yes”

The man nodded and his voice that had now started to annoy you filled the room once more. “I used to have them… used to watch football on Sundays. Went to church” he let out a small laugh as if the thought of it was unbelievable. “I know, I did, but I can’t picture it anymore… it’s funny how you don’t even notice the time go by, horrible shit just stacks up day after day, you get used to it”

Tyreese turned his attention towards the man and spoke with distaste laced in his voice. “I haven’t gotten used to it”

"Of course you haven’t, you’re the kind of guy who saves babies, it’s kinda like saving an anchor, when you’re stuck on a boat-“ you had by know decided to drown out his voice as he tried to make justiciable to let him go.

Your thoughts got filled with Daryl like they had for the most time since the prison fell. You missed him. He always looked out for you. Ever since you met you were drawn to each other. Daryl used to pretend he hated you, especially when Merle was around he couldn’t have his brother think he was soft. However everyone knew he had always secretly looked out for you ever since he met you he’d felt the need to protect you. It came to the point that whenever you wanted to go on a run to get new supplies or do anything really you’d always ask Daryl. You had never spoken about it to each other but there was a silent agreement between everyone even you and Daryl that you were his kid and he your father. It might not be by blood but it was how it had come to be. Everytime something happened to you if you got hurt or if you were sad they’d always notify Daryl, but most of the time he already knew and would be with you to try and cheer you up in his own moody way. When you’d been out on the road before you found the prison you’d always sleep next to each other making sure the other one was safe. Even in the prison your cells were next to each other. He always looked out for you. He taught you how to hunt, he taught you how to use his crossbow, and to fight people to be able to protect yourself. Like Judith was “little asskicker”, you were the “big asskicker”. You couldn’t help but to miss him and the thought of him being hurt from the people in Terminus made your stomach hurt. You didn’t really want to voice your thoughts but you needed the reassurance and Tyreese was the only one who knew who Daryl was and could give reassurance. So against the warnings your mind gave you, you voiced your concerns.

“Do you think Daryl’s okay?” Your voice came out quieter than you expected as your mind filled with more scenarios in which Daryl had gotten hurt in.

Tyreese turned from Judith to look at you. He tried to give a reassuring look on his face as he answered. “I’m sure he’s fine Y/N”

”So Daryl’s your dad, maybe boyfriend” he continued to gues what Daryl was as you made no indication of actually giving anything away to him. After a while he stopped, he wouldn’t get anywhere with you, but he was still confident that if he talked enough to Tyreese would let him go.

“See, you’re a good guy, saving babies and teenagers.

“You have no idea about the things I’ve done”

“You’re a good guy, that’s why you gonna die today, it’s why the baby is going to die, why the Y/N is going to die” both you and Tyreese stood up taking an intimidating step towards the man, your knife pointed at him. “Or… you can get in that car, get out of here, keep on being lucky.”

“You think you’re gonna kill me?”

The man turned his sole attention to Tyreese as he answered him. “Why haven’t you killed me? How does having me alive help you? Why the hell are you even talking to me? Take the kids, take the car and go, I don’t want to do this today”

“For your information we could always use you to get more information or w e could kill you know, like you said we have-“ you got cut off by an explosion going off. Tyreese rushed to the window to see what was happening and saw the smoke over the forest.

“Is that Terminus?” The man moved forward as if trying to see out through the window but he had no luck in that department as he slouched back towards the wall.

“Yeah, probably”

“Maybe you’re gonna win this, maybe your friend, I mean maybe that woman just got capped, maybe I’m gonna be the one who gets capped when she comes back”

“Nobody’s got to die today”

“Man if you believe that… the it’s definitely gonna be you and the kids, even if the place is burning to the ground”

“Man maybe you can shut up and stop talking before I kill you myself” the man took his eyes of Tyreese to look at you as you had your knife pointed at him an annoyed look on your face. He didn’t believe for a moment that a teenager would be able to kill him, nor win in a fight against him. He had a way to high ego to think that you would be able to do any harm to him, he underestimated both you and Tyreese and when he heard as well as saw Tyreese look out at the walkers coming toward the cabin he moved quickly and soon enough his hands went to hold Judith in a hold that would be easy to break her neck.

He told you both to drop your weapons and you both did so not wanting him to hurt Judith. As he saw the walkers claw at the windows he looked towards Tyreese telling him to go outside. As Tyreese went outside he went over to you and bound your hands together with some spare rope just like you had done to him earlier. He made sure the knot would hold before he went I’ve r towards the wallow-talkie and tried to connect to the woman (apparently named Cynthia) on the other side.

While he did all that you tried to desperately tie up the knot that held the rope around your wrist together. Right as you were able to get rid of the rope around your wrist (thankful Daryl taught you how to do it) the noise from outside stopped. It became deathly quiet and the man looked towards were the last pounding against the walls had been. He took out his knife and was about to kill Judith when you quietly and quickly grabbed the knife that was laying right were you left it beside you on the floor and you ran over to the man. You saw red as you knocked him over, he had threatened to kill Judith and Tyreese. Threatened your sister and one of your closest friends. You knocked him towards the floor and your hand went into the air as you threw it down onto him repeatedly stabbing the knife in your hand into him. even after he was clearly dead.

Tyreese had to carefully walk over to you as he took the knife away from you. He told you that the man couldn’t hurt them anymore nor the walkers, everything would be okay. You appreciated his comfort as you hyperventilated for a few minutes over the fact that you’d just killed a human. You’d killed walkers before but never a human being. In your mind it was justified as he was about to kill all of you anyway, but you still felt like you’d lost something inside of you.

It was a while later when you glanced out of the window and saw Carol as she walked towards the cabin, Rick not that far behind. You broke out in a relieve laugh as a smile spread briefly over you lips, this made Tyreese glance out towards where you were looking. You booth scurried to get everything as you both wanted to leave the cabin not being comfortable to stay inside any longer than you needed to.

As both you and Tyreese stepped out of the barn you glanced at the people led by Carol. Your eyes scanned the crowd looking for one person in particular.

Daryl stared at you in disbelief he couldn’t believe you were actually alive, he’d seen you get shot, and without medical attention he guessed you’d died. He hadn’t wanted to keep hoping in case he would someday find your corpse rotting away (either as a walker or actually dead).

Daryl took in your bloodied state, you’d no doubt had to fight. Dirt and blood covered most of your clothes, and your face had a few cuts covered in dried blood. Your once white shirt was miss colored and your jeans had been ripped in some places, your jacket had blood stains all over it. Daryl could only guess what you’d gone through to end up looking like that (he didn’t even look that bad). He didn’t like all the blood covering you, he didn’t like not knowing what had happened, he didn’t like being away from you, he needed to protect you, he’d lost Beth to a couple of strangers, he wouldn’t lose you too.

When your eyes finally found Daryl, you had a soft smile on your face as you saw him visibly relax at your eye contact. While Rick and Carl ran towards Judith in Tyreese’s arms, Daryl stumbled forward towards you, dropping his crossbow to the ground. You met him halfway and he engelfulled you in a tight hug. You’d never know nor would anyone else but Daryl let a few tears fall in relief as he hugged you tightly knowing you were still alive, actually alive. As he felt you wrap your arms around him he felt you hug him just as tight, the comforting sensation you both brought each other was all you needed to ground each other and know that either of you were dreaming, this was real and both of you were okay.

As Daryl heard you sniffle he realized you were crying and he hugged you even tighter, taking one hand to your head and petting it softly — not knowing fully how to comfort someone, even now, having comforted you all those times before he still was unsure if he did it right. However he did know that you were crying from relief, because he did the same thing. You had your father back and he had his kid back and knowing that, you both knew that everything would be okay in the end. You were yet to be bested by someone when together, even when apart you always won, always found your way to back to each other. You would beat this world together and that was all that you needed to know, and the fact that neither of you were planning on leaving soon.

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brighttears · 10 months

Text

Safe

Joel Miller x reader

no physical description, no use of y/n

Summary: After a startle at breakfast in Jackson, Joel calms you down from a panic attack.

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: graphic depictions of panic attack, negative self talk, pet names (baby, honey, sweetheart, darling)

A/n: just a lil somethin :3 also the panic attack is based off of personal experience just in case anyone is sus im not makin this shit up lol

—

Culture shock is the perfect term to use in relation to what it's like coming into Jackson after months on the road. It’s bright, vividly colored, large, loud, and always so fucking busy. You haven’t been around this many people since Boston, but so much has changed since then. It's been a few weeks now, but you still haven’t even figured out how to let your guard down.

The dining hall is the worst part of the day. You will yourself to come and eat because you believe it is good for you, you need to get used to it, and you don’t want to other yourself by taking your plate outside. You feel separated enough already, like a wild animal being introduced into a zoo enclosure. But god, the scrapping utensils on plates, chewing, so much conversation, boisterous laughing, people getting up and down from their seats; so much open space with so much activity, you can barely keep your eyes down enough to be able to look at the food you’re trying to get into your mouth. But Joel is always right there with you, with a comforting hand on your thigh, grounding both you and him, eyes flicking around just as much as yours, and a matching sigh of relief once you make it back outside, with a ‘We did it’ or ‘Good job sweetheart’ to pick your spirits up.

You don’t know what it is about today; nothing you can put your finger on, just some uneasy feeling that you woke up with. Some days are just like this, though, like a scratch you can’t itch somewhere in your brain, irritating your nervous system until whatever it is decides to let you out of its clutches.

“Come on honey, time to go,” Joel says from the door as he pulls his jacket on. You let out a deep breath, staring out of the kitchen window with your arms crossed over your chest, an absentminded hand smoothing over your throat. Squeezing your arm with your other hand, you will yourself to move, leave the house, go down to the dining hall. Its just breakfast, just breakfast, just fucking breakfast. Come on. You can do this. You’ve been through much, much worse than this. Come on.

“Hey,” Joel’s voice sounds suddenly from right behind you and you jump, sucking in a breath with a defensive hand jutting out towards him.

“Fuck.” You breath back out, leaning down and pulling your hand back to you electrified chest, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” You shake your head, guilty and embarrassed for reacting like that to Joel, who you know wouldn’t even dream of hurting you.

“It’s alright darlin’, it’s alright. You’re ok.” He coos.

Blinking hard, you nod, “Yeah, sorry, you just startled me. I’m fine.”

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t tryna sneak up on ya,”

“No, I know, it’s just… I don’t know, I just feel… off today.” You say as you straighten up.

Joel meets you slowly, placing his hands on your arms. “You wanna just stay in this mornin’? I can go grab the food or have Tommy or Maria—”

“No, no, I can do it.” You interrupt him and swallow hard.

“You sure? There’s no shame in—”

“No,” you shake your head, “I’m fine. It’s fine. I’ve been through worse.” You smirk, trying to lighten the mood.

Joel returns a light smile. His eyes fall to your lips, and he leans in for a quick kiss before turning back to the door. His touch relaxes your shoulders and you take one more deep breath before following him outside. As you start down the road, his arm slides around your waist. Even just a small gesture like this from your man makes you feel safer. When you feel his breaths, deliberately deep and even, you follow suit, and the two of you prepare for the upcoming onslaught of breakfast. Despite your efforts, though, you can feel your heartbeat quicken as you near the doors.

As you enter, Joel’s arm slips from around you but you grasp each other's hands as you walk to the table that Tommy and Maria are already sat waiting at, both giving you a smile as you come to your seats.

“A bit late this morning.” Maria says.

“Slept in?” Tommy winks.

“No, uh, just, late morning, I guess.” Joel replies, not meeting their eyes, instead instinctively sweeping them over the room. You keep your own eyes locked on the table.

“You ok?” Maria asks. When you look up, there’s concern in her eyes.

“Yeah, fine.” You throw a smile and look back down at the table, still linked to Joel by your hands.

“Well food’s out and ready, we were just about to grab our own plates.” You hear Tommy.

“Alright,” Joel says, letting go of your hand and moving to get up from his seat. Just as you finally let your gaze up from the table, a crash and a scream sounds from nearby, and without even thinking, you’re suddenly on your feet, stanced ready, a hand on your empty hip and an arm swung back towards Joel. A yelp escapes from your throat and your entire body is rigid and burning with panic, chest twisted so tight it won’t let you breathe, teeth clamped so hard it hurts.

Then, silence. All there is is your breath, jumping like snapped rubber bands, and the blood rushing in your ears. Eyes still pinned open, you force your neck to move and look around you. Hundreds of eyes look back at you. Everyone is staring. However, your head is empty of embarrassment, still full of threat, threat, threat, threat, threat.

“It’s alright, honey,” sounds from behind you, then a hand on your arm, and you switch your stance to face the touch, grabbing the hand while your other fumbles for the weapon that is not on your hip.

“It’s me, it’s jus’ me, baby, it’s alright, it’s me.”

Your eyes blink rapidly as Joel’s face comes into focus, the blurry haze of panic slowly starting to clear.

When you try to speak, your breaths stab out from your lungs. “What happened?” You finally get out.

“Nothin’, sweetheart, someone just dropped somethin’. It’s ok. You’re safe. It’s alright.” He tells you, hands coming up to cup your cheeks. “It’s alright.” He whispers, focusing your eyes on his. “It’s alright.”

“Are you ok?” You hear yourself say.

His thumbs stroke your cheeks as he replies, “I’m fine. Nothin’ happened. We’re safe, baby. We’re safe.”

Though your brain is beginning to process and trust his words, you can’t move, only tremble.

“Alright, let’s get you outta here.” Joel’s eyes come away from yours to flick around you, and that’s when you remember where you are. Muscles moving in snapping spurts, your neck jerks left and right, and still, hundreds of eyes look back at you. Now with room enough for it, embarrassment burns your entire face and neck.

“It’s alright, honey,” you hear Joel, thumbs stroking your cheeks, bringing your attention back to him in front of you, “let’s jus’ get you outta here.” He nods, then shifts to beside you, one arm around your waist with his other hand rubbing your shoulder. You keep your head bowed, steps jagged with full body tremors.

As soon as the outside air hits you, you begin to gasp, barely realizing that you’re sobbing. Joel catches you before you collapse. There's the panic, still shooting through you’ve been eletrocuted, but the humiliation is a whole other kind of overwhelming. “Fuck.” You cry into Joel. You bury your face deep into his shirt and jacket to muffle the screams that you can’t hold in. He squeezes his arms around you, rubbing your back, his chin resting on top of your head, whispering, “It’s alright, baby. It’s alright.”

“I’m such a fucking idiot.” You let out into him in between bawls. “I fucking hate this. I hate this.”

“I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry. Come on, let’s get you back up to the house.”

Your trembling legs continue to betray you and you can’t get yourself to move.

“I can’t–I can’t move.” You admit.

“Alright, t’s alright, come on, baby,” He reassures, then hoists you up into his arms. Like a child, you wrap your legs around him, keeping your face buried in his collar, squeezing your eyes shut and attempting—with little success—to calm your breaths. The sobs fall out of you unrelenting as a waterfall.

By the time you get to the house, your breathing has calmed some, but the shaking won’t stop. When Joel sets you on the ground you hobble up the short steps to the porch and through the door, and he keeps a comforting arm around you as he guides you to sit on the couch. He kneels down before you, stroking your cheek with his hand, trailing his eyes over your panicked frame before focusing them on yours.

“Deep breaths, baby, t’s alright. Deep breaths.” He starts them and you follow, breathing deeply in through your nose, holding, and blowing out through your mouth.

“Where are we?” He asks.

“At the–the house.”

“Where’s the house, baby?”

“Jackson. In Jackson.”

“Thas’ right,” Joel cups your face, “we’re at the compound. We’re safe here, sweetheart. I promise. We’re safe. Nothin’s gonna hurt you.” He nods, you swallow hard and then let out another shaky breath and nod with him.

Your trembling shoe taps the floor. When you still it, your shoulders start to shake. “Fuck.” You close your eyes, cursing yourself. “I’m so fucking stupid, I’m sorry.”

“No, no, you’re not stupid. How many times you been here with me like this? This stuff happens. You’re not stupid. T’s alright. Look at me baby,” you do, and he repeats, “T’s arlight. You’re not stupid.” Joel shakes his head, eyes still keeping yours. One hand shifts down to your fist, which you hadn’t even noticed bring clenched closed. “Let me get you some water.”

When he moves to get up, your hand shoots out to grip the lapel of his jacket. “Don’t leave.”

“I’m not leavin’, sweetheart. I’m jus’ goin’ to the kitchen. I’ll be right over there. Won’t take two seconds.” Joel gently takes your hand off of his coat, raising his eyebrows with a reassuring look, then gets to his feet. You turn on the couch, watching him go to the sink to fill up a glass for you. “I’m right here, see?” He says on his way back to you. You nod, eyes staying trained on him as he kneels back down in front of you. When the cup shakes in your hand, he keeps his on it, delicately helping it to your lips. The water cools your throat, helping you to ground yourself. You empty it into your throat and then take a couple more deep breaths. “That feel better?” You nod. “Alright.” Joel sighs, setting the glass down on the floor next to him to take your face in his hands again, then bringing his face up to kiss your forehead. “Alright, baby.” He says again. “This stuff happens. I get the same way, I bet plenty a people in there have done the same thing. T’s a lot in there. You’re not used to all that. Neither am I. Todays just a bad day, huh?” You sniffle and nod. “Now, you’re not stupid. Ok?”

“Ok.” you finally speak.

“Alright. You wanna go lay down?” You nod, voicebox still not too confident. “Come on, darlin’.” Joel lets go of your face, reaching one hand around your back and the other to your legs for you to shift into his arms bridal style. You wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face in his collar, inhaling his scent of love and safety as the stairs creak under Joel’s feet taking you upstairs.

When you look up at him as he lets you down on the bed, his brow is furrowed with concern and there's sadness in his deep eyes.

Ashamed, you instantly look away. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to make you worry.”

“Baby I’m gonna worry no matter what you do.” He sits down on the bed next to you and strokes his hand over your cheek again, “You did nothin’ wrong. Don’t go hatin’ yourself for it. It’s not like you did this on purpose. Right?”

You shake your head and lean into his touch. Joel’s eyes land on your lips and remain there until he leans in to kiss you, slipping your bottom lip between his, and you reach your hands up to hang onto him. Knitting your hands into his locks with his stubbly cheek under your hand, you indulge in him.

Pulling away, he says, “Lay down with me, darlin’,” already with his hand on your back to slowly guide your back down on the bed. He keeps his head above you to meet your lips again, gentle yet firm, honeyed and warm. Closing your eyes, the pressure of his body next to yours, hand on your waist, and his lips on yours begins to relieve the pressure in your bones. Slowly, you feel yourself relaxing, though your foot still twitches in your boot, the residual aftermath of a panic attack.

Joel’s hand smooths over your cheek as he deepens the kiss, the sigh from his nose breathed over your face. When he pulls away, he shifts his arms to rest his hands on your face and stroke his thumbs over your cheeks. His eyes wander over you with lazy lids, his brow still lightly furrowed and bottom lip slightly pouted and wet from your mouth. He sighs again, then whispers “I love you so much.”

“I love you.” You whisper back, looking over his face.

Joel leans down to rub his nose back and forth over yours, then sprinkles light kisses over your cheeks, forehead, by your ear, the corner of your mouth, and over your jaw. Then he shifts his body to lie down, tilting your hips towards him with a soft “C’mere,” and you lay your head on his chest, bending your knee to rest your leg over his. Closing your eyes and inhaling again, you let your body weigh into his and grip his lapel. Tears ball up in the corner of your eyes.

You used to lay like this frequently on the road, keeping each other close, hanging on to the only sanity you knew. The lack thereof surrounding you protected you enough from falling asleep despite the relaxation it granted you, and you’d do it to watch the sun rise or set whenever you could catch it. When you did sleep though, you’d stay united, someone’s head on each other’s chest or leg.

On the same train of thought as you, Joel speaks, the bass in your ear on his chest, “Maybe sometime we could actually fall asleep like this.”

“Not now, I can’t sleep now.” You mumble.

“I know, darlin’. Too worked up for it now.” His hand brushes up and down your back, “T’s alright. Jus’ layin’.” Joel smacks a kiss on the top of your head, then sighs again, your head rising and falling with it, and wraps both arms around you. “We got time. N’ we’ll get used to it here. Get used to bein’ safe.”

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olinblogin · 4 months

Text

Someone requested this but I lost the request so I hope they see this TAT

I also added Mihawk speaking Spanish in this- I’m using google translate so please correct me if I said anything wrong :3

CROCODILE X GN!TIMID/SHY!READER X MIHAWK

Shuffling through your papers, your hands shook and nearly made you drop all of them. It was the first time you’d ever been complicit in a Warlord meeting.

They usually didn’t let you into these kinds of meetings since you were just a lower rank, but still a bit higher than cadets. Only reason you were here is because Sengoku got sick with something and Garp is too busy trying not to choke on rice crackers to deliver this speech.

Sighing, you mumbled words of assurance tk yourself, “it’s fine, I got this. I got this.” you tried and tried, but it only seemed to make you more afraid and aware of you soon being in the presence of the seven deadliest pirates of the sea… well… apart from the four Yonkou’s, that is.

Twisting the knob to the room where they usually held these kinds of things. All seven warlords were sat around a table, some chattering about, some paying zero mind. The babbling consisted of Gecko Moria trying to threaten Bartholomew Kuma… and he wasn’t reacting, only sitting through his Bible he carried at all times.

Thankfully they didn’t seem to pay mind to you… besides two of them. By far some of the most intimidating of the two, Dracule Mihawk, and Crocodile.

Mihawk’s eyes bore into you as you walk past, golden eyes piercing into the back of your head as if he was skimming you with them. Choking back a shudder, you sped-walk towards Garp, who was, of course, eating rice crackers. You two whispered among each other; and thankfully, he had that relationship with you that calmed your severe anxiety. You saw him as a grandfather in a way… even if not blood related..

Letting out a little sigh, you positioned yourself in front of the table, clearing your throat and catching the attention of all seven of the pirates.

“I.. uhm-.. as you all likely know, there’s been a spike in pirate attacks and raiding in the east blue… we’ve tried stationing marine galleons in those areas but there seems to be some that are infiltrated and firing at marine ships that come in. As much as we’d like to limit violence as much as we possibly can and put an end to those pirates reins; we do need your help. We ask you to please, if possible, go into the East blue and search for their marine galleons that have been hijacked. We understand this is likely frustrating we’ve had to call on all of you do many times..-“

Your speech was cut off by Doflamingo, to which you fought back a sneer at his audacity.

“So you want us to go beat around some low-lives, that’s it? Fufufu… and might I ask what you of all people are delivering this speech for. I thought it was supposed to be Sengoku blabbering on. Not a pretty thing such as yourself… such a shame you ended up in the marines, though.” He scoffed. You couldn’t help but recognized the not-so-discreet glares from Mihawk and Crocodile sent his way… they were just oozing with Conquerer’s Haki.

“Please allow me to finish my speech, then we can talk afterwards…” you say meekly.

“But why? I’m just stating how it’s a waste of such a beauty as yourself getting pushed into the Marines like this. Why don’t you come back to my kingdom with me, I promise I’ll treat you right and make you feel bliss you’ve never f—“ with that, Garp had cut him off, “I’d like to ask you to please be quiet as Y/N said; save any questions for after they are done giving their speech.”

You gave a quiet ‘thanks’ to Garp, resuming your speech.

The meeting flew by faster than you thought… and you were thankful for that.

You skittered out of the room… after you have the speech Garp had promised to let you go around town for a bit… you slipped off your uniform and slid yourself into a black tank top and some cargo shorts.

Shuffling out of your room and out of the marine base, you wandered aimlessly around town; not having any goal in mind besides just looking around.

“Hello.”

You nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard a voice behind you.

A smooth, soft voice may you add.

Spinning around you nearly stumbled and fell, catching yourself clumsily.

“My apologies for startling you, cosa bonita.” You recognized the man as Dracule Mihawk. His cold, golden eyes were unblinking, staring into your very soul… it was no wonder he was called ‘Hawk-Eye Mihawk’.

“Oh.. uhm. That’s fine.” You’d mutter.

There was an awkward silence.

“Well, uhm… it was nice talking to you..” you turned to leave, shuddering when you felt his cold, calloused hand grab your wrist. “Wait, cariño, por favor. I have a proposition… one I believe you might be interested in.” His words lingered in your mind.

A deal? What was he about to say…

“Don’t scare the poor thing. They’d be better off with me anyhow, considering how freaky your place is.”

This time, a rougher voice. In a gust of sand whirling around, you covered your eyes with your arm, shielding then from the whipping sand until it formed a person, Crocodile. You could see the curl of Mihawk’s nose; offended by Crocodile’s backhanded insult… you felt meek. You were practically sandwiched between these two warlords.

“I’ll have you know.. the gothic architecture of my home is authentic.” You could hear the sass in Mihawk’s voice…

“Wait..- Wait, What Are you two talking about..? Does this have to do with Mihawk’s.. uh.. proposition?”

“The proposition. Right. How forgetful of me, mi amado.” Mihawk said thoughtfully. “I would like you to come back with me.” Your eyes must’ve been wide as saucers… because Crocodile smirked, flicking ash from his cigar. “Seems there’s a bit of a competition. I was going to ask the same thing. You should come with me; I’d shower you with gifts of gold. You’d be the ruler alongside me.” Crocodile spoke sweetly, soothing and convincing, his hand slithering up your arm until he rested a hand on your hot cheeks.

“I don’t believe they would enjoy waking to the hot desert every day. Besides, that would be quite agitating, the sand in your eyes, si, Mi amada?” Mihawk spoke just as smoothly. “I would cook meals for you every night. We could unwind in my study and drink wine… I have the finest server to you.”

“Tch. That’s nothing.” Crocodile mused.

“That does sound lovely, really but..” you cleared your throat and stepped back. “but I’d prefer to stay here, I think. I don’t really want to leave here because I don’t really want to leave Garp behind-“

“That slag will be fine on his own.” Crocodile interrupts, biting down on the cigar in his mouth.

“I know he’ll be fine.. I mean- yeah, he’s more than capable of taking care of himself. It’s more of an emotional attachment than anything.” The two let out a quiet ‘ah’ as they listened intently, softening their posture when you’d back away. After a moment of awkward silence you scooter away, “it was a pleasure meeting you, goodbye.” Before you scurry along the streets, getting lost in the crowd of people who battered the merchant stalls and haggled.

The stress collapsed when you could smell the familiar scent of spices. Even if the streets were as crowded as they were, you still felt a sense of comfort knowing there were people around.

A horrible fear of being alone, you had.

Through the winding crowd you finally made it to your safe space among the cliff side overlooking the vast ocean, a particularly beautiful glint among the oceans currents that the sun beamed down on.

Taking out your rice cakes you packed for your lunch-break you chowed down like a starving dog.

“It seems they don’t give you proper portions of food in the marines,” you nearly squealed out of fear and choked on your rice cake, whipping around to see Mihawk looming over you.

“N-no.. they feed us proper portions—.. ᴵ ᵗʰᶦⁿᵏ..” you spoke after swallowing a large portion of the rice cake that went down quite painfully.

“Is that so. Hm. If that were the case would you not be in the mess hall, and eating the food they provide, cariño?” He questioned smoothly, standing by you, keeping eye contact with you.

It made a flush creep up your neck.

“I get really anxious when being around people—“

“But you seemed to feel quite comfortable in that crowd not much earlier,”

You pursed your lips shut, unsure what to say. When the words finally came to you, they came out much meeker than you’d wished; “I guess I’m just really anxious at work..?”

Mihawk’s eyes narrowed, royal golden eyes pierced yours. “I see.” He said simply.

You both say in a somewhat comfortable silence as you—as quietly as you could—finished your lunch. “Where’s uhm..- Crocodile?” You asked, cleaning up your area a bit. “I’m not sure where that oaf has gone. There’s no need to worry for someone as he is, Querida.” Mihawk would hum quietly.

Just as if on cue, it was like Crocodile materialized behind you two. “Don’t taint the dear’s mind, you enigmatic man. We both know they need someone with real emotion.” You had no clue what to say after it clicked in your head.

Were they truly fighting for your affection?

A few comments—mainly from Crocodile—were passed, until both turned to you.

“Well, who will you choose?”

#dracule mihawk #hawkeye mihawk #one piece mihawk #mihawk x reader #one piece crocodile #sir crocodile #one piece sir crocodile #crocodile one piece #crocodile x reader #sir crocodile x reader #Mihawk x Reader x crocodile

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bravo4iscool · 5 months

Note

Levi Baby🖤

The way I adore you for pairing Simon with a Chubby girl. I bring a thot to you if you're interested:

Bodyguard!Simon Ghost Riley x chubby f!reader

- He's newly retired , gets asked for a favor from Price for a friend's kid

- Said kid is a mid 20's thicc woman who is all business since she's a lawyer in Human Rights and involved with the UN.

- He thinks she's going to be a snob based off looks bc girl loves to dress and she does it well, she observes Simon as he is. Brooding, Haunted and Self Assureed with a drizzle of dark humor but loyal.

- They get off on the wrong foot [Simon was being an irrational ass forgetting his manners and respect], reader isn't scared of him and doesn't take lightly to being disrespect3d for no apparent reason.

- They're holed up living together under the radar since the thr3at to reader was pretty big seeing it was world leaders

- They're going to have to learn to live with each other, where Simon barks orders - reader is anamused and calmly condescends. He can't even get annoyed bc she's antisocial and a houseplant but he's trying

- doesn't help that he's so.so attracted to her.

*make this as suggestive as you want (give ghost heart attacks with her choice of home clothes please. We know he's touch straved, emotionally constipated and needed a therap session.

Make her stress him out by confronting all of that in her short fiery demon way please.

I hope your new year is sweet Love💋

oh lord. oH LORD. how can you write this and not think about me fainting😭 THIS IS- URGH- AMAZING AHHHQGACQGQVQZQZAVQ!!!!

i hope i can do this justice😭 normally i try to imitate simon’s accent but bro… i was just too tired to do it now, so i hope you can forgive me for that🥲

KEEP HITING ME WITH STUFF LIKE THIS OH MY GOD😩

not really happy but i tried my best :) also not proof-read!

(masterlist)

REQUESTS/ASKS OPEN!!!

“There’s no but’s!” Simon argues while almost dragging you—his protégée—along the hallway inside the safe house. “You’re in danger and it’s my job to protect you!”

“I’ve been perfectly fine on my own before,” you argue, trying your best to wriggle away from his grip. You hated it when he manhandled like that.

He turns around, his eyes fiercely staring down at you and you feel like they’re piercing through your soul. “Have you ever had the Taliban threaten you, huh? Or fucking ISIS? I don’t think so; so stop whining and follow me!”

You want to argue with him, tell him he’s not allowed to talk to you that way but damn, you knew he was right. Ever since you started working for the UN you’ve been threatened—you were getting used to it—but only by small groups not someone like the Taliban.

“We’re gonna stay here until the threat is eliminated for not serious anymore.” His statement leaves little room to argue but you’re itching to say something anyway. It’s wasn’t your nature to just shut up. You were a lawyer, you were used to arguing.

You grimace as you force yourself to accept your fate. You didn’t want to but in the end you knew Simon was right. So, you follow him, an annoyed look on your face. You hated it when he was right.

“It’s only temporary,” he grumbles as he kicks a door open and pushes you inside. “It’s not like I want it, okay?”

You only roll your eyes, throwing a halfhearted ‘whatever’ at him and inspecting the room he hauled you into. “This is where I’m gonna stay?” you ask him, a slight hint of defeat in your voice.

“Pretty much, yes. I’ll be on the other side of the hallway,” he explains, leaning against the door frame. “In case anything happened, of course,” he immediately adds; just so you don’t get a…wrong picture of this whole thing here.

“We got wifi here?” is you next questions when you turn to look at him, your arms crossed in front of your chest.

“No wifi. No contact to the outer world,” is his answer and you feel your blood start to boil.

“You have to be kidding me! How am I supposed to work then?” You throw your hands in the air, letting out an angry huff. “You can’t just cut me off civilisation!”

He only shrugs. “I can and I will. Work can wait, alright? Your life is more important now.” Again his voice leaves no room to argue but this time you won’t take it. You put your hands on your hips, looking up at him.

“You think that’s how it works? Then, please Lieutenant Riley,” you spit out his rank “fly over to the dozens of war criminals and tell them to stop too! Oh wait-“ you act shocked. “That’s not how it fucking works! You can’t expect me to sit still and look pretty while the world drowns in injustice!”

“Would make things a lot easier tho,” he mumbles under his breath while pushing himself off the door frame. “Just…do something that doesn’t require wifi or anything like that, alright?” Before you can even think of an answer he leaves, shutting the door behind him. Why the hell was he treating like some little child?

“How old is she?” Simon wants to know as he hands his old Captain the picture of you back. He’s sat on a chair, his legs spread, one arm resting on the back rest.

“Mid 20s,” Price answers, placing his folded hands onto the table. “She needs security and her father’s not really…trusting the usual companies; and since you’re nearly retired I thought you could use the job.” Simon holds Price’s gaze and nods along. “He trusts me, therefore he trusts you. She’s a lawyer, heavily associated and involved with the UN and human rights.”

“What are the details?” Simon slightly tilts his head, curiously raising his eyebrows.”

“24/7 protection. The full package. You’ve done it before,” Price explains and Simon once again nods along. “Before you take the job tho-“ he pauses. “She’s, well… she’s a lawyer Simon. You need to know what you get into.” The Captains gaze hardens, his back straightening. “She won’t like that she’s on protection detail, therefore she’ll be treating you like that.”

Simon only smirks, flipping his well kept coin between his fingers. “There’s nothing I can’t handle John. I’ve met people like that before and I was perfectly fine.”

Now Price was the one smirking while shaking his head. “I know and I don’t question your abilities but she’s a civilian—the one you’re protecting. You can’t handle this the way you’ve handled other subjects before.”

“I know what I’m getting into,” Simon assures in a calm tone definitely not knowing what he was getting himself into.

“Fucking hell,” Simon mutters when he first sees you. You’re walking straight to you office—the one he was sitting in—involved in a heated talk with that seemed like your secretary.

He’s able to make out single words but well, his hearing wasn’t the best anymore after nearly 20 years of military service. And now he thinks he probably should’ve stayed in the field.

The way you’re waking and talking and dressing just screams ‘snob’ at him. He slightly lowers his head to gaze at you, once again playing with his coin. Maybe he should’ve declined the offer and taken on the underground wrestling instead. Would’ve been more fun for sure.

As soon as you spot your guest you send your secretary away, bracing yourself for the following conversation. You weren’t a fan of getting security and you definitely weren’t a fan of the fact that it was a friend of your father’s friend and he—apparently—was everything but easy.

“Lieutenant Riley,” you greet him, extending your hand to him. When he stands up to his full height you slightly crane your neck; the professional smile still on your face.

“Ma’am,” he greets in a gruff voice, the skin of his hand raw and calloused as he return the handshake. “Pleased to meet you.” He isn’t. He just wants to leave but he brought this on himself so he needs to finish it now. ‘One year’, he told himself. ‘Then I can quit.’

“I can only return the pleasure,” you smile, clearing your throat. “Would you mind sitting down at my desk?” You ask, pointing towards said desk. “I think it’s easier to discuss business over there.”

Simon agrees, towering over you as he makes his way over to one of the chairs in front of the desk. You take place behind it, carefully straightening your blouse. He needs to warn himself not to stare. Fuck, why were you so pretty? A pretty little snob…

“This has to be taken seriously!” Simon raises his voice at you, successfully blocking the door of your office.

“This is nothing I haven’t dealt with before,” you argue with him, crossing your arms in front of your chest. “So please, Simon, let me get out of my office and back to work.”

He huffs, “Not a change. You’ll be staying here until the threat is cleared.” He glances over his shoulder, loving and hating the fact that you had a glass office. “Are these bullet prove?” he asks, looking at you again.

You sigh, “No.”

“We’ll have that changed,” he immediately answers and you start to shake your head.

“We’ll have nothing changed! You weren’t hired to renovate my office!” You walk towards him. “Now, Mr. Riley, please step aside so I can continue working.”

“Not happening.” He straightens up to his full height, expecting you to back off but you do the exact opposite. You swat your finger at him, looking up.

“I don’t care what you think, you will stay here; if you want it or not.” His voice is stern and stoic and you need to do your best to not full on scream at him.

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that,” you hiss, your index finger jabbing his chest. “I can make my own decisions, I’m a responsible adult. So don’t you dare talk down to me that way!”

When Simon doesn’t make a move you let out an angry huff and shake your head. Then you turn away and stalk towards your desk. “Fucking military man,” you curse under your breath, ignoring the way he stared you down.

You stare at your open suitcase, debating what to wear. On the one hand, you kinda were on your own, on the other hand, Simon was with you.

You were comfortable in your body—no question—you actually kinda liked the extra cushions but sometimes you felt like Simon was staring at you. Like he wasn’t able to take his eyes off of you and that made you…feel something. Something you were afraid of.

“Ah fuck it,” you say under your breath, fishing out some shorts and a shirt. You could care less about what Simon thinks. You both are only work related. Nothing else.

You tap down the stairs, walking straight into the kitchen. “You want something to eat?” You ask Simon, glancing at him when you hear him enter.

“You willing to make some?” he jokes, expecting you to say ‘no’ but when you say ‘yes’ his eyes widen and he pauses for a second. When you notice it you let out a small chuckle, opening the fridge and multiple cabinets to see what you could make.

“Any friends that’ll miss you?” he asks once you place a plate in front of him, looking up at you with curious eyes.

You shake your head, “Nope. Not really.” You sit down opposite of him, grabbing your fork. “Too busy to have friends.”

He tilts his head, blindly picking up the food either his fork. “No boyfriend?” He knows you don’t have one. You have no dates, no flings, nothing; but he wants to hear it from you. Maybe then his fantasies wouldn’t be so forbidden…

“Please,” you laugh. “We’d be divorced before we even married.” You take a sip of water and look at him. “I don’t have time for relationships and that kind of stuff. I have a target to pursue. Ain’t no time for distraction.”

He only nods in an understanding manner, playing with his beer bottle. “And you?” you ask. “You got someone?”

He shakes his head. “Nah. I’ve got you to deal with. That’s enough.” He smirks when he sees your facial expression, letting out a low chuckle. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for,” he continues joking. “But no. I don’t have anyone. Never really had.”

“Oh…” you say in an almost pitiful tone and he hates it. It not that he couldn’t get someone. He just didn’t want to. That’s a big difference. “Well not really different for me,” you then snort, slightly grimacing. You had this one guy ask you out for prom but that turned out to be a bet rather fast and after than you decided to not to date in school or university anymore.

Yeah sure, you were more chubby than other girls but that doesn’t mean that you’re not lovable, right? By now you were comfortable in your body—you were in your mid 20’s—but sometimes you felt yourself slipping back into the insecure girl you once were. The one who thought that no man would ever lay his eyes on her in a lustful or loving manner.

Simon’s itching to say something; to ask why you don’t have anyone… You’re perfect. You’re nice—even if he hated to admit it. You’re pretty, you’re so fucking soft… Did the men around you not see that?

“Simon?” You wave your hand around in front of his face, chuckling when he slightly flinches, his pupils blow. “Are you alright?” you carefully ask, eying him as if something was wrong.

But he only clears his throat, “Yes. Everything’s fine.” Then he hastily stands up and nods at you. “Thank you for the food.”

You watch after him as he leaves, a frown on your face. Was he really okay or was he just lying to you?

Simon on the other hand was probably turning red as a tomato. How could he allow himself to slip like that? Fuck, he needed to keep himself better under control.

As soon as he reaches his room he shuts the door and leans against it while opening his pants with shaking hands.

He had a—growing—problem and he needed take care of it. Now.

Approximately one week into the lockdown Simon finds you in the living room, crouched over a bunch of files and documents.

“What’s that?” he wants to know, looking over your shoulder.

“Work,” you simply reply, taking notes and pushing the papers around. You were so close, this close to finally finish this case but something was missing and it stressed you out.

He slowly nods, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “And how did you manage to get these files?”

“I’m a lawyer Simon. I have my ways and connections,” is your plain answer and you can basically feel him tensing behind you.

“What if they give away your location,”

“They won’t.”

“How can you be sure?” He tries his best to be calm but god, you were testing his nerves. He gave you strict orders and you were supposed to follow them.

You turn around with an annoyed sigh, looking up at him. “Because my father brought me those. You think he would sell me out to the enemy? I doubt so.”

You raise your eyebrow, waiting for any other complaint by him but be only looks at the files behind you, then at you again. “Maybe check the mission reports of the special forces.” With that he leaves you alone, more than confused.

You know why Simon told you what he told you when you find what you need exactly there. The mission reports were sitting somewhere beneath everything else because you didn’t pay much attention to them; in the end they were the solution.

Now you could finally link the crimes to someone and with that to the government or the military at least.

The next time you see Simon you almost jump into his arms, thanking him over and over again. “Now the case is finally closed,” you tell him with a big grin on your face, completely forgetting that you’re usually not so happy when around him.

Simon just awkwardly pats your back, pushing you off him and ignoring the burning desire deep within him. He knew it was risky to give you a tip but you were struggling and he didn‘t like that. He just hoped that you wouldn’t ask him why he knew that you should look at the mission reports. Once you knew that he was a war criminal this job would be over. And while you certainly were a pain in the ass sometimes he felt a very present attraction towards you.

Simon realises he’s a goner when he wakes up one morning and sees you walking around in a shirt. Just a shirt, as far as he can see and it does something to you. His hands are itching to touch you and he finds himself excusing himself more and more to the bathroom.

And you? You started to notice the kind of power you have over him and it makes you boast with pride. You, a chubby little lawyer in your mid 20s, has him, an almost 40 year old retired military Lieutenant, wrapped around your little finger.

After that you decide to play a little game. Wouldn’t hurt, no? Just subtle touches. Brushing his arm when you walk past him, patting his chest when he helps you with something, your legs touching his whenever you sit beside him.

He tries to shrug it off but you can practically feel how worked up he gets and how hard it is for him to keep him shit together; and that fuels you only more. How long would it take for him to break? To crumble beneath your touch, huh? You wanted, no, you needed to find that out.

Simon knows what you were doing. He isn’t stupid but he hates it. How was he so weak that you were able to play with him like that?

After a week, maybe two of you dancing around him he has you caged in against the kitchen counter, towering over you.

“What makes you think you can just play with me like that, huh?” he asks in a low voice, his eyes scanning your face for any reaction. “You think it’s funny? Working me up like that every day?”

You try not to be intimidated—or turned on—by him but god, he’s just- you don’t have any words for it. He’s tall, broad and fucking strong. You once got a look at the muscles under all his clothes and you weren’t the same after that. Nu-uh.

“I thought you like it,” you reply with a cocky grin, trying to overshadow your uncertainty. “Do you want me to stop?” You blink at him, acting all innocent and pure. In the corner of your eye you see his grip on the counter tightening. Oh, you had him where you wanted him.

A ‘bloody hell’ is all you get before his lips crash down onto yours and he heaves you on top of the counter. His hands find their way to your hips, scarred fingers tracing them and squeezing, wanting to pull you even closer.

The moment his lips touch yours you forget everything else. This is want you wanted—needed—for weeks. And lord, that man knew what he was doing.

You weren’t a fan of him dragging and pushing you around but right now? Right now you couldn’t wish for anything else. You bury your hands in the dirty kind strands of hair on the back of his head, gently pulling at them which results in him groaning in your mouth.

“Take me to the bedroom and maybe I’ll stop teasing you,” you breathlessly tell him once he breaks the kiss only to kiss you again immediately making you all hot and tingly.

You can feel him smirk against his lips before they trail down your neck towards your collar bone. “Ain’t gonna take you anywhere love,” he whispers and you’re able to once again feel him smirk against your skin. “Gonna fuck you right here on that kitchen counter. You want that?” he looks up at you through hooded eyes, which makes you swallow.

“Words love, words.” His tone is playful even tho you can see the desperation in the way his hands move all over your body, letting you see stars already.

“Yes…please,” you almost choke out, feeling like everything you want to say is being swallowed my your throat again. You’re unable to talk.

“That’s what I wanted to hear,” Simon teases, straightening up to kiss your lips again, cupping your cheek. “Gonna take good care of you,” he promises. “I’m gonna show you how a real man treats you,” he swears and you can feel a familiar but also unfamiliar heat building in the pit of your stomach.

(i got scared to write the rest👍🏼. i’m sorry, i’m still new to writing smut😭)

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matan4il · 1 year

Text

Buddie 614 meta

What I find to be the loudest about Eddie’s arc here is that the whole ep is meant to show us everything that can go wrong when people try to live up to others’ expectations, and how much better it is when people are looking in and figuring out what’s right for them, which means they’re performing for and as themselves. That’s the context for Eddie’s date and story. He needs to figure out how to want a romantic relationship again without feeling like it’s a task he’s performing just to please others. That’s the place he gets to at the end of the ep, which is a good place for him to be. ~~

And this is essential to Eddie. Based on how little people talk about it, maybe many in fandom aren’t aware of how 911 implied back in 217 that he only married Shannon because she got pregnant. Eddie said explicitly he didn’t think he was ready to get married at the time, and he brought this up in the context of Shannon and him having Christopher. So I think it’s very meaningful that here, when his aunt wants to set him up, he jumps straight to the (wrong) conclusion that he’s expected to marry Vanessa. He was under this pressure to perform for others before, he knows how disastrous it can turn out, and you know what? Trauma totally triggers this kind of reaction. It tells us where he’s at emotionally, that there are still things he has to deal with. ~~

Speaking of trauma, another symptom of it can be denial, and we do see a bit of it from Eddie during this ep. Remember how he claimed he doesn’t panic back in 501? Right to a doctor’s face while she’s diagnosing him with panic attacks? He did it again in this ep. The thing is that healing isn’t linear. He was advancing with some things, but in 614, faced with his aunt’s ambush, he feels cornered back into a place he’s been in before, a place that left its scars on him, and Eddie regresses. Which is okay! But that’s one step back in order to take two steps forward. Before the ep ends, he will figure out that it’s better not closing himself off completely to the idea of getting into another relationship, even if Tia Pepa’s surprise blind dates are not the way to go about it. ~~

As a side note, I loved Bobby basically trying to trick his subordinates into giving him a review, and poor Buck stepping right into that one. I saw it coming and I almost choked laughing. This show is damn brilliant with comedy, too. We don’t give it enough credit for that! But it's also a moment when I was really proud of Buck. If Eddie's panic caused him to take a step back, we got to see his husband, who grew up so unloved that he needs every bit of approval he can get, being mature and able to point it out when Bobby was over-praising him in his evaluation. And you know what's more? Bobby knew it would go like this. He has seen Buck's growth and he knew his surrogate son would do the right thing and correct this. Bobby's set up wouldn't have worked otherwise. Excuse me while I get emotional over this. ~~

Fitting for an ep where 911 flexed its comical muscles, it was embarrassing how hard I laughed at Buck’s reaction to Eddie’s romantic woes. Remember when Buck heavily implied how hurtful it was to be ghosted by Abby, saying in 502 that he had been in Ana’s position, of being unwanted and led on instead of getting a clean break up? Well, look at how quick Buck was to suggest ghosting as a viable option for Eddie this time! It’s almost like Buck doesn’t even notice that he will offer whatever it takes to keep his husband away from these potential Love Interests, even if it contradicts stuff he has said in the past himself. The way Buck could be so calm making this suggestion, and take the “threat” in stride, because duh, he knows his husband wouldn’t want these LIs intruding on their marriage and family either, and it’s absolutely legit to just ghost this girl if she doesn’t get the memo, was hilarious. And honestly, who can blame Buck? He’s defending his hot man. ;p ~~

Which brings me to my weekly gif set, that I dedicated this time to Buck pointing out on Eddie’s failure to let Ana down easy. I mean, it already IS canon that these two talk about everything, it IS canon that Buck is someone who gets to hear all about Eddie’s romantic woes. But this proves that Eddie doesn’t just fill him in using broad strokes, stuff like just letting Buck know that he indeed broke up with Ana. No, they get down to the finer resolution as well, and Buck gets to hear every detail about how Eddie did it with the delicacy of a bull in a china shop. And clearly, Buck wasn’t about respecting either Ana or Eddie’s pain during that break up, at least not enough to stop Buck from teasing his husband about it. XD It’s so funny how naturally Buck’s staking his claim on his husband even while they’re discussing going on dates. I see you, Buck, and am totally with you! ~~

One last “made me laugh” point. I’m tempted to snicker about Pepa telling Eddie he should be shopping for antiques. I’m queer, so please excuse my dumb queer humor, but ummm. That’s not a very straight suggestion for your nephew, Tia. Or maybe that’s deliberate, maybe it’s implied she is trying to set up Eddie with anyone, girls or guys? After all, she did use gender neutral language during this ep... So we can’t know for sure, but something tells me Pepa just wants Eddie to officially have someone, and if she learns that Buck actually IS her nephew’s other half? (I can’t call either of these morons ‘better half’, sorry) Then she’d be the first one to throw them a party! And I love that, and I love her. Because after all, she’s not just a sassy queen, she’s not just incredibly loving and caring with her nephew, she was also willing to sacrifice her own image in his eyes, she was willing to be seen as herself, and not as what he expects, in order to help remind him that even if his first marriage failed miserably, he can find the courage, move on and re-commit himself to someone else. And soon maybe Eddie will realize and Pepa will find out who is that someone else that Eddie can have a beautiful committed r/s with...

~~ (my weekly meta posts) (my Buddie gifs) (all of my content)

~~ My tag list will follow in the reblog, please let me know if you wanna be added/removed here.

~~ Thank you so much for reading and for any reblog, like, comment or supportive tag! I really couldn't keep doing these without knowing people want to see them. Also, my eternal gratitude as always to @whosoldherout. I'm always in awe of your giffing!

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roronoagem · 5 months

Note

Maybe this would be better? What about Law finding out his SO was forced to eat a devil fruit. She hadn't told anyone and it was only made obvious after she fell overboard and couldn't swim. Maybe she had talked about her previous love for swimming, but no one caught on that it was something she couldn't do anymore.

characters: trafalgar d. water law

content warnings: gn!reader, law feels a bit betrayed lol, reader almost drowned, & very slight argument.

a/n: shitting my pants rn bc i met law in the anime a couple of times & my knowledge is based on vids & his wiki 😭 i’m scared to write him so out of character, please don’t come at me if it’s nothing like law i beg you . . . i’m gonna jump bye !

let’s start with you speaking about how much you loved swimming, how much you loved going to the beach.

everyone on the polar tang knew about it, but they were totally oblivious that you couldn’t do it anymore due to your devil fruit.

not even your captain knew about this.

and he didn’t know you had the powers of a devil fruit, in the first place.

and when you fell right into the water and your head didn’t pop out of the water, bepo started to panic.

“CAPTAIN!” bepo was running from side to side searching for law. “[y/n]..!”

that’s when law appeared and noticed your absence, trying to get the polar bear to explain the situation.

when shachi finally pulled you out of the water, after he jumped in to search for you, you were almost passed out. law felt a hint of panic at the sight because well… it didn’t make much sense from what the bear said.

did you hit your head? did something underwater attacked you? could it be that you got so scared you passed out?

impossible. he knew you too well, you wouldn’t get scared just because you fell into the water, it was calm enough to be able to swim too.

when you finally opened your eyes and started coughing water, law felt relief fill his chest. he checked your pulse and body temperature, make sure you were breathing properly. he wrapped you in a blanket as you were completely soaked.

you felt a bit dizzy, unable to focus on whatever was surrounding you. “[y/n]! i’m so glad you’re okay! i’m sorry!” bepo started to apologise because he stood there panicking instead of taking action, but you weren’t mad at him.

“it’s okay… don’t worry,” you were able to say before meeting law’s hard gaze. you shivered, because he seemed unhappy somehow. “we need to talk,” that’s all he said.

you ended up in his office, he finished checking you up just to be sure you were truly okay. he didn’t say much while doing so, which caused the tension between you two to grow.

“say something,” you gave in before law. it was tiring, to say the least. he was avoiding your eyes too. what the hell?

“you almost drowned,” he said then, tone obvious. but he still was avoiding you. “but i’m here now,” you answered back.

law took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose as he tried to not snap at you. “you were drowning,” he repeated, finally meeting your gaze. “but i’m alive!”

“what happened?” his tone was cold, he was treating you like any other patient. “i fell in the water, shachi pulled me out. that’s all,” you tried to sound as confident as possible, protecting your secret. “you know what doesn’t sound right to me?” law tilted his head to the side, “you talking every second about how much you love swimming, you love the sea, the ocean, and then this happens!”

of course he finally snapped. law is not a dumb man, he knows everything about everyone in his crew — he has to. it was clear you were avoiding telling him something important, and this was making him feel both angry but also hurt… did you not trust him enough?

“i-i forgot how to do that, i guess??” you responded, trying to make him let go of the subject. “you like it so much but you forget how to do that? how is it that i’ve never seen you get too close to the water since you joined this crew, huh?”

so he had noticed. he knew that it didn’t make sense but he never found the right moment to bring this up. but now…

“you’re the one avoiding it in the first place,” you retorted, as if putting him under the spotlight for a second would help you win the argument. “yes, because i ate a devil fruit and–”

when law paused, you noticed realisation spreading all over his expression. he found the missing piece of the puzzle. you ate a devil fruit too.

“why?” as he said that you couldn’t bare to look at him anymore, his tone showed that he felt betrayed by you for not telling him such important information. “[y/n]-ya… look at me,” law took a step closer.

“i was forced to eat it! i didn’t want to do that! i-i genuinely loved the ocean, swimming, these weren’t lies! but…”

when you started sobbing, law moved closer and gently cupped your cheeks. you met his gaze and noticed that he wasn’t angry anymore, he was trying to comfort you the best he could. “i know this is something you’re not proud of, but this information is vital. i needed to know that you ate a devil fruit because it could put your life in danger, just like today. i’d never judge you for it,” he tried to reassure you.

you felt relieved, you wiped your cheeks and then leaned closer to hug him. he caressed your back gently and let you stay like that for as much as you needed.

“i’m sorry,” you then murmured, sighing. “you’re alive and that’s all that matters to me,” law’s tone was firm, he held you a bit tighter for a second. you smiled at his words, words full of his love for you.

#꒰ 🖋️ ꒱ writing #꒰ 🌐 ꒱ one piece #꒰ 💭 ꒱ trafalgar d. water law #FORGOT TO SAY THIS. thank you for being the first req on my new blog hehe #trafalgar law x reader #law x reader #op law x reader #trafalgar law drabble #trafalgar law blurb #trafalgar law imagine #one piece x reader #op x reader #trafalgar one piece #one piece

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jennaimmortal · 7 months

Text

Hey OFMD friends! There’s a few little things (and one big thing) I’d like to try to clear up based on a number of discussions I’ve seen in various places.

1. Stede understands sex & sex references. When he responds with “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” or something similar, that’s a posh people thing. They pretend they’ve never heard of sex whenever it’s brought up in public or with strangers. Just weird aristocrat things! But Stede knows. He’d definitely had plenty of (likely not very pleasant) sex with his wife, and he’d very likely had other sexual experiences as well. More importantly, though, he’s a voracious reader! The man likely had a whole stash of filthy, bawdy novels & books of poetry. There was PLENTY of it, even back then!

2. Ed & Stede’s inn is NOT on the same island as the Republic of Pirates. They’d never settle on an island currently occupied by British military. They sailed away from the Republic of Pirates & went to a totally different island.

3. Frenchie is the new Captain because he was already First Mate, so there was no reason for them to take a vote. Yes, the crew chose Olu in 1x9, but that was when they were mutinying against Izzy & there was no official First Mate in place. The crew don’t seem to have any qualms about Frenchie’s abilities (so far anyway!) It will be a lot of fun to explore that dynamic in S3.

4. Zheng’s very likely only going to be with The Revenge until she finds one of her remaining ships that weren’t in the Republic of Lirates harbor when Ricky attacked.

I’m hoping, though, that we, the audience, will get lucky enough to keep Zheng with them for a while before she does find one of her own ships. I definitely want to see some shenanigans with The Crew, Zheng, & Auntie, including at least one raid. Fingers crossed!

The one BIG thing:

There are MANY disabled characters on the show. Wee John has mobility issues & chronic pain. Lucius is an artist & scribe w an amputated finger & also has chronic back pain. Swede has scurvy. Jackie’s right hand is a prosthetic.

It’s extremely important to understand that all disabilities are relevant no matter how visible they are. There has been some very harmful discourse about disability representation surrounding Izzy’s death & it really needs to stop. A HUGE percentage of disabilities are invisible. Those of us (yep, myself included) with invisible disabilities have had to fight tooth & nail for basic recognition & acknowledgement, let alone benefits & proper medical treatment. We’re still fighting & it’s a major uphill battle!

Let’s not give more ammunition to those fighting against us by claiming that Izzy’s disability was the only important one.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk! 💞

#our flag means death #ofmd #stede bonnet #ed teach #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd s2 #izzy hands #ofmd discourse

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multific · 2 years

Text

Start of Something New

Simon “Ghost” Riley x Reader

Warnings: Kidnapping, attempted murder, attempted rape

His team found you locked in a dungeon. You were so scared you only had a knife yet you did significant damage to one of his men.

They wanted to shoot you but Soap pointed out you were more scared than an enemy.

You were brought back to the base, for information and also to look at the injuries you might have.

"I told you I don't know anything. They took down our plane, I was one of the survivors. They killed the others, tortured us."

"Lieutenant, she is telling the truth, we found her ID and her story matches," said Soap.

"Then why did you attack us?" turned the one with the mask back to you.

"I told you, they tortured us, I thought you were the same and I rather die than let them do those things."

Ghost nodded and walked out of the room, his men followed as a doctor took a look.

"I have a feeling the lass is not telling the entire truth, keep her here. She is not a regular civilian." Soap nodded and prepared a room for you.

Ghost later spoke with the doctor and Price.

"She was very dehydrated and had a fractured rib. Many cuts and bruises and a broken finger which didn't heal well. She said she was almost raped many times, the only thing that kept them away was that she fought."

"She is not telling us something, why didn't they kill her?"

"She didn't say that, but she did mention something about her father, she could be from a rich family."

Now that made sense.

Ghost prefered things when they made sense. And Price needed answers.

That night, you finally slept in a bed, warm and calm, with no guns to your head, or knife to your neck, just you and the pillows.

It was warm and comfortable and you finally let out all the tears you held back.

Two days later, Ghost got into your room as you were eating your lunch, putting a file onto the table in front of you.

"So your Daddy's rich and that's why they took you."

You looked up at him, meeting his eyes.

"Yes, but he doesn't care enough to pay for me." you took another bite from your lunch. "Anything else? Sir?" you asked when he didn't move, you looked up at him, he was looking at you, his mask covering his face but his eyes were very telling.

"I know now why they didn't kill you, but I don't know why I feel like this."

This confused you, you tilted your head. Was he angry with you? Should you do something?

"Uhm... I'm not sure wh-"

"You bewitched me, Love. Something about you... I can't quite point it out." you smiled, still not understanding but you wanted to be understanding or at least look understanding.

"You don't get it, do you, Sweets?" you shook your head slowly, no, you didn't get it. He let out a sigh, not one to be talking about his feelings at all. "There is something about you, I don't know what it is, and it's confusing me. I want to keep you safe, I stayed outside of your room for the last few days, every night, in case you needed someone."

"So that was you, I thought someone was spying on me." he shook his head. But from the way he talked you understood he wasn't the 'let's talk' kind of guy. No, he was the 'push it down' kind. But you thought you understood what he meant.

He liked you. For some strange reason, only seeing you a couple of times, and he liked you.

You picked up the file he threw in front of you.

"This might be my past but it is not me. If you want to know me, you have to ask me, not these files." you two just looked at each other, not saying a word. Then, you decided to break the silence. "I'm single and I have a thing for British army men with masks on." you said and smiled, it made him chuckle. This was a start.

As he finally sat down next to you and watched you eat, you had time to think about this situation.

"They offered to help me go back to my old life, but I don't think I want to."

"What do you want to do then?"

"I have some medical knowledge, do you think I could become a nurse? I always wanted to be one."

"I'll arrange it for you, I'm sure the doc here can help you learn more."

"I'd like that." you nodded as you finally finished your plate.

"So, you'd stay here with me?"

"That's the plan." you nodded and you could see his eyes sparkle.

There was something intriguing about you patching him up after a mission. He wasn't sure what but it made him feel warm inside.

"This wasn't an invitation to get hurt, Lieutenant."

"Copy that." he immediately replied. "Call me Simon."

"Alright, Simon, what do you do around here for fun?"

"I have a mission soon, but I can show you around."

"If you have to go, go. I don't want to stand between you and your work."

"Of course, but I do want to show you around the med bay at least. Introduce you and we can ask the doc."

"Alright then, you lead the way."

---

His mission lasted three weeks.

During that time, you became familiar with the place, and the doctor was so kind, she helped you through all and showed you so many things. She was glad to see someone finally interested.

Of course, she wasn't blind, she immediately understood why Ghost brought you there. Not only to learn but also to keep you for himself.

"They arrived back you know. I heard Captain say they came back two hours ago. Thankfully none are hurt so they are not here."

"Two hours ago?"

"They are wrapping things up, he will come and see you soon, do not worry. They just have to put their guns down and such." you nodded at the doctor, she was right, the fact that none of them was here was a good sign, it meant they are not hurt. He is alive and he's back, that kept you going.

"Hi Doc." came a voice, Soap arrived at the med bay, you recognized him, he was a kind man. "I might have a pulled shoulder, can you look at it for me?"

"Y/N will have a look." she pointed at you and you guided him to a bed.

He was quick to remove his shirt and showed you his back and shoulder while pointing at the place that hurt.

You examined his shoulder, the bruise was clear but you needed to make sure it wasn't broken or the muscle is not damaged. You grabbed his arm and started to move it around, when you moved it in a particular way, he whined. You couldn't help but wonder if Ghost was this muscular, or was he more muscled? You didn't let your hands wander, you kept up a professional look, but your mind was filled with Simon.

"What happened?" just as you asked Ghost entered the room.

"Fell off the stairs and landed against a pipe. Fucked up my shoulder pretty bad."

"Did you dislocate it?" you asked fully knowing they are the kind who would put it back themselves.

"No, just hurts like hell."

"You pulled the muscle here." you said as you pressed your palm against the area. "There is a bruise so I'll apply some cream to cool the area. You need to be mindful of it or it will get worse. I'll give you some painkillers as well." you said and he nodded, you grabbed the cream and applied it to his skin. "Let it soak in for a few minutes or your shirt will rub it off."

"Thank you, Sweetheart." Soap commented. "Came to see your girl, Sir?"

"Fuck off." said Ghost as Soap laughed as he headed to the doctor who gave him the painkillers.

"Should I have a look at your shoulder as well?" you asked Simon.

"No, I'm not hurt, came to ask when your lunch is?"

"She can go." the doctor yelled behind the two of you, you both turned to have a look at her. "In fact, she is free to leave for the day." she said pointing around the empty room.

You both nodded and headed out, you did turn to her and muttered a small thanks.

She just winked at you.

"How was your mission?" you asked as you sat down on your couch, a warm tea in your hand.

"Usual." he rather not tell you how many men he killed, he wanted you away from that part. "I see you and the doc are getting along."

"Oh, yes, she's lovely. Very helpful, I learned a lot during just three weeks. I missed you, you know? You weren't in front of my door every day." you laughed a little and you could tell just from his posture as he was also very happy. Even if he had his mask on. You wondered often if he had a scar or something. According to the doc, that wasn't the case, and not like you'd care anyway. But it still made you wonder.

"Glad to hear that you missed me much like I missed you, also glad to hear you are getting along here with everyone." you nodded as he spoke. Seeing that he was also very fond of you, knowing your feelings were reciprocated.

"You know I was scared you would change your mind." you spoke. He tilted his head slightly, almost as a puppy would when they are trying to understand something.

It was adorable.

He was adorable.

"I thought you might come to me with the 'In my line of work I cannot afford to have such relationships' speech." You said as you tried to imitate his voice, miserably failing but he did really appreciate it.

"Not going to lie, I did want to tell you that. But as soon as I stepped into the med bay and saw you helping one of mine, I knew I couldn't."

"Were you jealous because I was touching Johnny?"

"No." his reply was fast, way too fast. "But I didn't like it."

"So, you were jealous."

"I'm never jealous."

"Sure..." you rolled your eyes and took a sip from your now almost cold tea.

"Stop teasing me. I'm telling you I wasn't jealous. I was more... angry."

"Possessive then. You didn't like that I was touching another man when you never even held my hand before." you had a point, he knew you had a point, and yes, he admitted, he was extremely possessive.

He wanted to be the one to hold you, he wanted to be the one to keep you safe. So seeing you touch Soap, ignited a fire in him. And you liked that. You liked to see him be like this.

"Can I ask you something?" you said and he nodded.

"Do you do this with every woman you save?" he started to laugh, so much he even teared up.

"Why are you laughing?! This is a perfectly normal assumption." you crossed your arms after you put your mug down.

"It might be but-" he continued to laugh. "I don't even look at the people we save now. You caught my eye, I told you."

"So, no secret wives?"

"I'm not married, I told you before."

"That's why I said secret wives."

"More than one? Fuck no, you are enough trouble already. No secret wives or husbands. Only you, Love." you nodded, happy with his answer.

"I want to kiss you, but I understand if you rather not take off the-" you pointed at your own head, meaning his mask.

"We-You could-Close your eyes." you did as you were told immediately and you anticipated his kiss, which soon came. You heard him shuffle but you didn't peak.

Soon, you felt one of his hands on your cheek, you heard him let out a sigh and his breath fanned over your face.

You felt your heart rate pick up, probably he felt it too as his thumb was right over your pulse, it was probably an instinct of his.

"You good?" he asked as he felt your heart.

"Yeah. Excited." you heard him smile as he soon closed the distance.

His lips were thin, yet still very full and warm. It was a short and sweet kiss, he was clearly testing the waters. Holding himself back, but when you raised up your hand, grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him in for another kiss, a deeper, hungrier kiss.

You let him lead, as you felt his hands move along your side as they came to a rest on your ribcage. You smiled into the kiss.

Who knew a man of his power can be so gentle and caring?

"You are mine." he said as he pulled back from the kiss, he stayed close, as you still felt his hot breath against your lips.

"And you are mine, Simon." you said to him as you pulled him in again.

You were his and he was yours. You wouldn't have it any other way.

Taglist: imreadinggoaway @fleursirvart @v-2bucky ehsebastiancrunch-time-sports @pxstelrainbow ablogbypeteparker liamssmilersmexylemony @greenarrowhead feelingsareharddd @thisismysecrethappyplace @sincerelyfan @theoneanna @aestheticsandmarvel @rororo06 @castellandiangelo @avengers-r-us @destynelseclipsa @spilledinkindumpster celebsimagine @capsiclesdoll snoopy3000 @firstangeldragonranch @puknow @crazzyter @alwayshave-faith @soleil-dor @alex12948 scream-kiwi79 @lxdyred @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @liveforkarljacobs @anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek @paola-carter

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

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kpopfanfictrash · 1 year

Text

Love to Hate (Extra Scene III: Jungkook’s POV)

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Genre: Fuck Buddies / Enemies to Lovers

Pairing: Jungkook / Reader

Synopsis: Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you've done your best to rid yourself of the taste since you were old enough to walk. Occasionally though, your mother manages to rope you into an obligatory function – or a blind date with playboy billionaire, Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook stands for everything you loathe about the world you left behind, but you can’t deny the spark of attraction between you. Intrigued by the promise of mutual satisfaction, you agree to one night in bed… and quickly realize you’re in far, far deeper than you ever intended.

Author’s Note: This scene takes place during Chapter 7 of Love to Hate and is told from Jungkook’s point of view. PLEASE READ THE ENTIRE STORY BEFORE READING THIS SCENE (otherwise there will be spoilers lol).

Rating: 18+

Warnings: semi-public sex, breast play, fingering, dirty talk (hypothetical cum play, possessiveness), spanking, multiple orgasms, somewhat rough sex

Word Count: 8,704

“If this trend were to continue, I’m not certain how we could keep up with production. This would obviously pose a problem for our shareholders, so let’s brainstorm solutions before the next quarterly call. Does that work for you, Mr. Jeon?”

A long, pregnant pause.

“Mr. Jeon?”

Beneath the table, Namjoon gives a not-so-subtle kick to Jungkook’s kneecap. Jerking upright, Jungkook glances around to cover his recent lapse. Based on Namjoon’s glare, his attempt must not pass muster.

“I – yes.” Jungkook nods, hoping he hasn’t agreed to something terrible. “That works for me. Thank you.”

The woman pauses, clearly unused to being thanked by the CEO. “Of course, Mr. Jeon,” she says, recovering quickly to take her seat.

Fingers tapping the acrylic table, Jungkook glances as covertly as he can at the clock. A wave of panic washes over him when he realizes the meeting has nearly ended since Jungkook doesn’t remember a single discussion. Unusual, for a man who insists on booking his own travel because he doesn’t trust anyone else to find the best deal.

It’s not like Jungkook to be distracted, or to not pay attention to detail. A swift glance at his notebook proves equally damning. Usually, Jungkook takes careful notes but today, the only thing written is the date at the header.

Subtly, Jungkook straightens. Forcing himself to concentrate, he listens to the rest of the updates. Someone from Info Security briefs Jungkook on a new phishing attack. A woman from Finance updates them on the search for a new travel vendor. Jungkook listens closely, responding when needed but can feel Namjoon’s gaze on his cheek the rest of the meeting.

Knowing his COO, Namjoon has some thoughts about Jungkook drifting off. It’s for this reason that Jungkook hangs back once the meeting has finished. Namjoon also stays, waiting until the last person files out before swiveling sideways, exhaling in a way which implies years of exhaustion.

“Tissue?” Jungkook offers blithely.

Namjoon fixes him with a look. “No, thanks. What’s going on?”

“I’m… not sure what you mean.”

Brows lifted, Namjoon pushes himself to stand. “Yes, you do.” Lifting his laptop, he walks around the table. “For weeks now, you’ve been distracted. Years of planning and here we are, in the home stretch but somehow, it feels like I’m alone. Tell me what’s going on – and don’t,” Namjoon adds, a note of warning to his voice, “say this is all in my head.”

Jungkook closes his mouth, about to say just that.

Sinking into his seat, Jungkook searches for a response because Namjoon is right. Something has been going on and Jungkook has been distracted. Ever since the dinner at Aleve, Jungkook hasn’t been himself. Realizing his fingers have resumed tapping the table, Jungkook forces himself to stop.

Two weeks have passed since he last spoke to you at Aleve. Two weeks of pretending neither of you cares about the other. Unless you really don’t care, and Jungkook is the only one who’s pretending.

Thoughts souring, Jungkook considers the possibility. Fighting the tide of memory is useless – as soon he thinks of your name, Jungkook disappears. He remembers the last time he saw you, entering Aleve with his father and Namjoon. Hearing your laughter from across the room, craning his neck only to find you with Liam Jessen. Jungkook’s worst enemy, smiling at you like you were the only person in the room.

Jungkook tried to recover after that, tried not to think about it – a plan swiftly dashed when he ran into you outside the bathroom. Cheeks hot, Jungkook once more relives that brutal interaction.

It doesn’t matter who you sleep with. I know you’ll call as soon as you realize they’re just as boring as every man before me.

Jungkook was jealous, but there’s no excuse for what he said. Your response was equally cutting, reducing whatever had been between you to sex. Jungkook should have pressed harder, but imposter syndrome stepped in and all he could do was agree.

Now, a voice in the back of his mind – which sounds suspiciously like Yoongi – whispers that Jungkook pushes people away to see if they’ll come back. Unfair, whispers that same voice. True relationships don’t keep score. You shouldn’t be guilted into admitting your feelings before Jungkook deigns to tell you his.

It’s no wonder you haven’t reached out, proving the second half of his statement incorrect. You haven’t felt the need to call him since Liam. Instead of lashing out, Jungkook should have just told you how he felt. Maybe then, he’d be seeing you tonight instead of facing yet another night alone in his apartment. Wondering if you’re by yourself or out there with Liam.

Swallowing hard, Jungkook pushes the thought away. Realizing his fingers have resumed their tapping, Jungkook lays his palm flat on the table. “I’m sorry,” he exhales and looks up. “I… know I’ve been distracted. I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”

Concern knits Namjoon’s brow. “That’s not – I wasn’t trying to get you to apologize, man. I genuinely want to know what’s going on. Are you alright?”

These simple words dissolve the barrier between Jungkook’s mind and his mouth. Embarrassing, how fast genuine concern can make Jungkook break down. His father would have had something to say about it – which probably means Jungkook shouldn’t be embarrassed about the reaction.

“No,” he admits. “Everything isn’t okay – but it will be. Soon. I know I’ve been distracted, but I promise to do better.”

Namjoon looks at him wryly. “Who are they?”

Jungkook blinks. “Huh?”

Laughing to himself, Namjoon takes the seat beside him. “Whoever it is that has you in shambles,” he continues. “This conference room is dry, otherwise I’d offer you a stiff drink. Feels like we should imbibe if we have to talk about feelings.”

Jungkook can’t help but smile. “That obvious, huh?”

“Only to those who’ve been there before.”

Leaning back in his seat, Jungkook tilts his head. He and Namjoon have been friends for years, although their friendship began as a business relationship. Namjoon wasn’t around for the less savory parts of his life; the years when Jungkook was drunk more often than not and took nothing about this company seriously.

Other people remember though, and Jungkook has had to work to turn his image around. Even now, his father’s media headlines haunt his footsteps – although these have recently ceased since Jungkook became CEO. You’re a distraction to his work by any definition, drawing Jungkook’s attention away from the company. Especially so if Namjoon has noticed.

“Can I give you some advice?” Namjoon offers, steepling long fingers before him.

Jungkook lifts a brow. “If I said no, would that stop you?”

“Probably not.”

“Then, sure. Go ahead.”

Namjoon leans in. “Don’t let this fester.”

“What?”

“Whatever it is that’s been bothering you.” Namjoon lowers his hands. “Don’t let things linger – fix the situation before it’s too late. My mom always says not to go to bed angry and in this case, I agree with her.”

Jungkook considers. “When would you not agree with that statement?”

“If you’re both drunk and neither one of you are making any sense.”

“Huh.” He nods. “Valid.”

“Anyways,” Namjoon sighs. “I’ve been paying attention to you this week, and whatever’s going on hasn’t gotten any better. Rather than keep going, you should make a change.”

“A change to… what?”

“Hell, if I know.” Namjoon lifts a shoulder and lets it fall. “I only know the bare minimum of information about your situation.”

“Fair point.” Jungkook exhales, pushing a hand through his hair.

Shoving his chair back to stand, Namjoon adjusts his suit jacket. Scooping his laptop from the table, he heads for the door only to pause on the threshold, looking as though he’s debating whether to say something or not.

Evidently, saying the thing wins out and he straightens. “You know you can delegate, right?” Namjoon says, leveling Jungkook with a look. “Today’s meeting, for example. You probably don’t need to hear every update from every department. Let your CFO talk to Finance and tell you if something’s important.”

The furrow between Jungkook’s brows deepens. “You’re probably right,” he allows.

Truthfully, Jungkook is struggling to find his management style. His father ruled through fear and the occasional carrot. Jungkook wants to make his own mark on the company and have his employees work because they actually want to, but this is proving more difficult to achieve than he thought.

“Just a thought.” Namjoon shrugs, slapping the door before disappearing down the hall. Jungkook is left alone, the clock on the wall the only sound apart from his thoughts.

Exhaling lowly, he stares at his hands atop the acrylic table. On his right, the sun has gradually sunk towards the horizon. Today is Friday, meaning most of his staff has gone home by now. Their weekly report-out is usually the last meeting on people’s calendars. Jungkook rarely leaves before the sun sets, though. He uses his time in the evening to respond to his emails.

Namjoon is probably right about delegating. Afraid of being seen as an absentee leader, Jungkook has joined every meeting for every direct report since the Board voted him in as CEO. It’s probably time for him to relax the reins, or else be seen as a micromanager.

Releasing a breath, Jungkook pulls his notepad closer. His cell phone sits beside him on the table, stubbornly silent since the start of the meeting. Jungkook doesn’t bother to check if you’ve texted, since he already knows the answer.

Since Aleve, you’ve been quiet.

Things were awkward before then though if he’s being honest. When you called Jungkook the night prior and asked him to stay, he nearly jumped at the chance. Despite having a Board meeting the next day and mountains of paperwork to do – the moment you called, Jungkook came. The truth of the matter was he wouldn’t turn down any opportunity to see you, no matter the consequences.

Jungkook should’ve known then that he was in trouble, but he didn’t fully realize until the next day. When he awoke and saw your face limned by sunlight, Jungkook knew things had gone further than he intended.

He had feelings for you. Strong feelings. Feelings Jungkook had never experienced, and ones which put him in danger because they broke all your rules. This was also the moment panic set in – you’d been more than clear about what would happen if he broke a rule. Jungkook had fallen for the one person he’d promised not to – and so he ran away.

Later, he texted a casual thank you. Jungkook tried to pull back, tried to disguise his true feelings so you wouldn’t suspect things had changed. Somehow though, this only seemed to make things worse. The voice in his head whispers Jungkook did it on purpose – shut you down before you could tell him to go.

Eyes closed, Jungkook swivels in his chair. Namjoon is right. He should call you, but the thought of picking up the phone and putting his heart on the line seems insurmountable. It’s nearly six o clock on a Friday, anyways – more than likely, you’re out with your friends.

Jungkook’s throat tightens. Or possibly out on another date with Liam.

Pushing his chair back, Jungkook reaches for his notebook. Over a month has gone by since he ran into Liam at your fundraiser – it seems impossible for feelings to have developed in such a short time. Then again, Jungkook didn’t feel this way about you a month ago. Hell, he was in denial of his feelings up until your apartment.

Now that he knows though, it’s up to Jungkook to confess before it’s too late. Even if you are hooking up with Liam, that would be better than if you developed feelings for him. This depressing turn of thought is thankfully interrupted by Jungkook’s phone buzzing.

Withdrawing this, he hopes for your name only to be disappointed by the truncated line of text. Exhaling lowly, Jungkook swipes.

Dad: You need to attend the Y/L/N’s anniversary party tomorrow evening. Unexpected business out of town – will be gone until Monday. Sign my name in the card, thx [6:36 PM]

Frown deepening, Jungkook pockets his phone. Just like his father to expect him to drop everything and attend to the family business. If the Board vote on company strategy weren’t imminent, Jungkook would likely tell his father to go to hell.

There’s also the fact that your family name is in the text – Y/L/N. This party is being thrown by your parents, which means you might attend. Coming to a stop before his office, Jungkook is struck by the possibility this could work in his favor.

Rather than chase you down, he could show up at the party and see your reaction. Something to inform him whether his feelings are returned before placing it all on the line.

Jungkook knows that feelings shouldn’t be conditional. That if he wants to confess, he should just do it, but Jungkook manages to push the voice aside. Already building a plan for tomorrow, he strides into his office and lets the door shut.

All day long, Jungkook debates what time to arrive. Get there too soon, and he might scare you off. Arrive late enough and he could miss you entirely. You haven’t been shy about the feelings you hold for your parents, and Jungkook doubts you’ll stay long.

In the end, he exits his town car a half hour late, but Jungkook needn’t have worried: you’re nowhere to be found. Deflating slightly, Jungkook wanders inside and orders a drink from a bar. Turning to face the ballroom, he swirls his whiskey while scanning the floor.

The party is indistinguishable from any other society event, doing little to recommend it in Jungkook’s opinion. Pulling himself from the bar, Jungkook engages in small talk while making the rounds and keeping one eye on the door.

Nearly an hour passes, and Jungkook finds himself trapped in conversation with one of his father’s close friends. Laura something or other; Jungkook can’t recall her surname. Nodding while listening, Jungkook tunes Laura out while she prattles on about her new diamond mine.

“Have you been there?” Laura prompts, forcing him into the conversation.

“Hm?” Jungkook lifts a brow. “No, I’m afraid not.”

A risk, since he didn’t hear where Laura mentioned, but a negative answer discourages follow-up. Or so it would seem. With Laura though, this prompts a soliloquy about the benefits of Cannes in the fall. As soon as he considers it polite to do so, Jungkook excuses himself and heads once more for the bar.

He’s nearly made it when the crowd parts and time seems to slow as you enter the ballroom. Dressed in a gown of midnight blue, you throw your head back and laugh – and Jungkook’s gaze drifts sideways to land on Liam Jessen.

His feet turn to ice. Coming to a stop, Jungkook can’t help but stare at the sight of your arm intertwined with his. You look beautiful, but then again, you always do. Gown sweeping the floor, you’re nothing short of ethereal and seeing you on the arm of another man slices Jungkook’s chest open.

When you look at Liam and smile, the pounding of Jungkook’s heart drowns out all thought. Grasping ahold of himself, Jungkook spins around to stalk across the floor. He can’t see you like this. Can’t talk to you calmly when you’re here with Liam.

Dropping his glass on the bar counter, Jungkook asks for a whiskey and waits while it’s poured. Staring down at his hand, he regains control of his breathing.

You came here with Liam.

You came tonight with a date, and that date is Liam. Sluggishly, Jungkook tries to separate the two thoughts, but they continue to attract like opposing magnets. Discomfort prickles in the back of his mind, putting two and two together. Your rules resurface, unasked and unwanted.

Number one, no discussion of personal lives (broken several times over). Number two, always use protection and get tested monthly for STDs. Number three, that you’re not exclusive. Number four, that either of you are free to end things any time, and rule number five, that your parents can’t find out.

It’s the fifth rule which has Jungkook’s stomach in knots. He assumed you didn’t want to tell your parents because you’re estranged and dating anyone from their world would bring complications. Which makes sense, if Jungkook and you were just having sex. Complications are the antithesis of that type of thing.

For you not to have similar reservations about Liam means things between you are different. That possibly you think Liam is worth the hassle. Unable to contemplate any meaning beyond this, Jungkook’s thoughts curdle and sour.

The bartender finishes pouring, and Jungkook accepts this without comment to chug a third. Setting this back down, Jungkook wipes his mouth with the back of one hand. Exhaling, he considers the options before him.

You haven’t seen him, which means that Jungkook could leave. His father might be angry, but frankly, that’s the least of Jungkook’s concerns. The more Jungkook ponders, the more appealing this seems, and the more his resolve hardens.

Draining another third, Jungkook turns around and spots you across the room. You stand beside a different bar, smiling at something your brother just said. White-hot jealousy licks Jungkook’s stomach, seeing you introduce Liam to your family.

The rest of his drink disappears, and Jungkook places the empty glass on the counter, sliding the bartender a fifty. Adjusting his suit jacket, he skirts the edge of the room as he heads for the door.

Your face burns in his mind. Standing between your brother and Liam, you seemed almost happy. Buoyant. Without a care in the world. Exactly the opposite of how Jungkook feels now. Clearly, you haven’t been missing him during your time apart.

Forcing his expression to neutrality, Jungkook crosses the rest of the room. He’s nearly made it to the hallway when a man steps into his path.

“Jungkook!” Reaching for his hand, the man clasps this tightly. “What a surprise – fancy seeing you here instead of your father. Seems like the regime change is in full swing, eh?”

With great effort, Jungkook slows his stride. The man is Charles Smith – a valuable ally, and one of the few Fortune 500 companies willing to invest in clean energy. Namjoon has drafted numerous proposals for their companies working together, which means Jungkook can’t afford to alienate him at such a crucial time.

Forcing a smile, Jungkook comes to a stop. “Something like that,” he says smoothly, shaking his hand. “How are you this evening, Charles?”

“Oh, Chuck is fine. I’m swell,” he says, withdrawing his hand to swirl his gin. “The doctor keeps telling me not to drink, but we’ve all got to die sometime – right?”

“Right,” Jungkook agrees, though his gaze darts towards the hall.

Unfortunately, this means you’re forced in his path. You’ve left the bar and now stand beside your mother, your expression aggravated in a way Jungkook can understand. When your gaze locks with his, you go completely still.

Even if Jungkook didn’t know who your companion was, he’d know you were related. Something about your bearing, the confident way you stand screams familial relation. You probably wouldn’t like hearing that, but traits by themselves aren’t bad. It’s what you do with them that matters.

While your mother seems unimpressed by her surroundings, you look visibly frustrated. Jungkook isn’t sure why and probably shouldn’t care to find out. Your familial problems are none of his concern.

Turning around, Jungkook thanks Charles for his time before he moves on. Your worried face refuses to dissipate from mind though, despite his best efforts. Eventually, Jungkook exhales and turns – only to notice Liam is still with you. Feet pausing, Jungkook finds himself feeling foolish for the second time that night.

Grasping you by the arm, your mother returns you to their circle – completing the image of a picture-perfect family. Idiot, Jungkook curses, disappearing again. Foolish to not hear what you said, to ignore the many, many times you’ve placed boundaries between you.

Jungkook’s inner voice delights in his anguish, strengthened by the ache in his heart. Not good enough for your father, not good enough for Y/N, the voice muses. How can you hope for a serious relationship when you’ve never been in one before? Liam might be an ass, but at least he has ambition. He made something of himself, rather than spend so many years drowning in self-pity.

As cruel as the thought is, it’s not entirely wrong. Liam has more in common with you than Jungkook would like to admit – you’ve known from a young age what you wanted, just like Liam. Liam wasn’t born into wealth; his family doesn’t exist within the same social circle. It almost makes sense, the idea of you dating.

Liam betrayed Jungkook’s confidence once, but they were both young then. Naïve. Maybe Liam has changed since the internship – God knows, Jungkook has.

Returning his thoughts to present, Jungkook reaches the valet. Ultimately, you brought Liam to meet your parents and not Jungkook. Whether this means you have feelings for Liam or can’t see a future with Jungkook – either way, the result is the same.

Jungkook supposes he can’t blame you for that. Jeon Energy is the Goliath to your David. Until Jungkook’s proposal is approved by the Board, the direction of Jeon Energy remains the same. Dating him would go against everything you believe in. It isn’t as though Jungkook has let you in on his plans or allowed you to think better of him in any way.

While waiting for his car to arrive, Jungkook keeps both hands in his pockets. The fact that you brought Liam means Rule Number Four can’t be far behind. The rule which allows either of you to end things between you. Jungkook recalls how he scoffed at this rule, certain it wouldn’t be necessary for either one of you.

In his experience, interest rarely lasts longer than a month. Jungkook figured your spark would fizzle and die, that you’d gradually stop calling and there’d be no hard feelings. Now, he can’t help but wonder at how foolish he was.

Jungkook needs to end this before you can.

By ending things first, it’d allow Jungkook to keep some of his dignity. It would also give you an out, alleviating you from pressure of letting him down. If anything, Jungkook imagines you’ll feel some relief. This way, you don’t have to explain about Liam.

Flipping his keys, Jungkook is staring into the night when footsteps approach.

Turning his head, he watches the moment you enter the hall. A vision in blue, fabric drifting around your legs as you come to a stop. For a moment, Jungkook wonders if you’re here to see him before banishing the notion as dangerous.

“Hi,” you exhale, your voice carrying through the hall.

Brow furrowing, Jungkook wonders why you came. Maybe Liam is close behind, ready to leave with you in his car.

“Hi,” Jungkook exhales, his chest tight.

Glancing over his shoulder, you search for someone, and Jungkook’s confusion grows. Everyone else remains at the party. Distractedly, Jungkook wonders if you saw him leave and came to check on him. The thought of your pity makes his neck heat.

“Can we talk?” you ask at last, meeting his gaze.

Jungkook pauses, at war with himself. If he agrees, he’d be moving up the timeline of your conversation. Not to mention the fact that merely the sight of you loosens his resolve. If you were to talk now, who knows what he’d say.

“I…” Jungkook hesitates, certain he should say no. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Y/N.”

Something flares in your gaze. “I didn’t say it was a good idea. I said I wanted to talk.”

Jungkook is forced to press his lips together to keep from laughing. It’s just such a you thing to say that against his better judgement, Jungkook finds himself nodding. Despite knowing this will hurt more tomorrow, Jungkook gives in.

Taking him by the arm, you tug him down the hall. Jungkook follows closely behind, unceremoniously dragged while you find a suitable room. Pulling open a door, you shove Jungkook in, flicking the light switch to quickly follow suit.

Your dress settles around you, nose nearly pressed to his in the dim light of the closet. Jungkook’s heart pounds, overloud in such a small space. Your scent wraps around him, body and soul, pulling him in when he should run away. It muddies what he came here to tell you, causes him to forget that you’re breaking his heart.

Unable to breathe, Jungkook looks at the door. Then, at your ear. Anywhere but at your gaze, which can see right through him.

Eventually, the silence moves him to speak. “You wanted to talk?” Jungkook asks, careful to keep his tone neutral.

You blink in amazement. “That’s… all you have to say?”

Jungkook notices you’re holding his wrist at the same time you do. Dropping him as though burned, you take a step backwards and your spine hits the door. This rejection stings more than Jungkook would like to admit.

“Well, I was about to leave,” he says stiffly, and meets your gaze.

He wishes he hadn’t when your eyes narrow, full of fire. It’s unfair of you to look at him like that. Unfair to look at him at all when you came here with Liam and again, Jungkook wonders why you’re here.

“Fine, then,” you huff. “I’ll speak.”

Jungkook’s heart aches when he hears the clear hurt in your voice. As infuriating as tonight has been, Jungkook had every opportunity to say how he felt weeks ago. Hell, he could have called yesterday, but he didn’t. Instead, Jungkook showed up tonight and expected to be met with your praise.

Folding your arms across your chest, you fix Jungkook with a glare. “I haven’t heard from you in a while,” you exhale.

Jungkook hesitates, unsure how to respond. You came here tonight with Liam, so it doesn’t make sense for you to pull him aside for small talk. To chase him towards his car only to ask Jungkook how he’s been.

Forcing his expression to remain neutral, Jungkook searches for an answer that’s least embarrassing. Or incriminating.

“I’ve been out of town,” he says at last.

You study his face. “Business trip?”

“Yes. Amongst other things.”

It’s mostly true. Jungkook and Namjoon have been traveling across the country, securing their plans for the upcoming Board meeting. You don’t know anything about that though, so his answer remains vague.

“Seems awfully sudden,” you observe.

Realizing his jaw is clenched, Jungkook forces himself to relax. The fact that you’re here, mad at him when you came with Liam is beyond infuriating. “I can’t help but notice,” he says, voice dropping, “you didn’t text me either. Or did I miss your messages?”

Something in your expression falters, but you recover quickly to step closer. Breath held, Jungkook looks you up and down. Everything about your body language screams anger, but this can’t be right. You’ve been dating Liam for weeks, have introduced him to your parents which means a breakup with Jungkook can’t be far behind – right?

“No, you didn’t,” you admit.

Jungkook’s resolve hardens. “So, I have to assume you didn’t want to see me.”

His voice comes out calmer than he is though, and the irrationality of your discussion spurs a wave of uncertainty. You didn’t text Jungkook; he didn’t text you. Both of you ignored the other and now, here you are. That part makes sense, no matter how uncomfortable.

What Jungkook can’t explain is why you ran after him. Why you pulled him aside and wanted to talk. None of what you’re saying matters if you’re planning to end things – unless you’re not. A wild spark of hope catches, and Jungkook smothers it quickly.

“I was waiting,” you blurt out, incredulous. “After all the weirdness at the restaurant, I was waiting for you to reach out to me!”

Jungkook’s thoughts stutter, then resume. You wanted him to reach out. Of course, that doesn’t change the fact that you moved on so quickly.

“What weirdness?”

“Oh, please.” You stifle an eye roll. “I ran into you on a date with Liam, and you acted strange.”

Jungkook’s entire face heats. “I mean, I do think it’s weird that you want to date Jessen,” he says, unable to stop himself. “He’s not a good guy.”

“Why not?” you demand. “You can’t just say that, and not explain.”

Jungkook hesitates, on the verge of explanation before he pulls back. It doesn’t matter. If Jungkook tells you about Liam, he’d have to explain everything – his mom, his dad and the whole, morbid past. There’s no point in sharing if you’re leaving tonight.

Something about this feels wrong, but Jungkook can’t put a finger on why.

“Why did you even come here?” you ask, your expression changing. “Why did you come to my parents’ party if you didn’t want to see me? If you really don’t care?”

I care, Jungkook wants to yell. Obviously, he cares but you were the one who walked in on someone else’s arm. The confession chokes in his throat, stillborn.

“I came because my dad asked me,” Jungkook says instead. “He couldn’t attend, so he sent me in his place. It would’ve been rude for one of us not to attend.”

Your jaw tightens. “Liar.”

Jungkook goes still. “Excuse me?”

Somehow, you move even closer. “I said, liar,” you repeat, chin tilted. “Your father didn’t ask you to come. You came here because you wanted to – why can’t you just admit that?”

Panic sparks, realizing you can see right through him. And still, Jungkook doesn’t understand why you’re pretending to care. Why you continue to push, trying to get Jungkook to say he cares when you’re the one leaving. Do you want him to beg? Would leaving be better if you left him humiliated?

Anger is easier to focus on than pain, and so Jungkook grasps it tight with both hands.

Something in your gaze falters. “I – right, okay,” you murmur, fumbling behind you for the door. “Got it. I just… assumed. I’ll go.”

Hearing your voice crack, Jungkook’s fury vanishes. No longer caring about the why, he focuses on the what and reaches out for your wrist. Your breath catches when his fingers close around your warm skin. Gently – so gently – Jungkook turns you around and presses you to the door.

Inhaling your scent, Jungkook crowds you against the wood. You stare back at him and Jungkook wonders what would’ve happened if he’d just called.

Feeling suddenly helpless, he drops the façade. “You’re right,” Jungkook admits, his voice hoarse. “I wanted to see you.”

Bending his head, he crushes your lips with his.

Your noise of surprise muffles, dissipating the moment your lips touch. Hands encircling his waist, you slowly trace the panes of his body. Jungkook loves the way you touch him – gentle and then, not gentle at all. Losing himself in your touch, Jungkook kisses you roughly.

When your hands tug his hair, Jungkook groans into your mouth. Memorizing the feel of your body with his, he shuts out the fear that this might be the last. Within minutes, the kiss has turned urgent, both of you searching for something unsaid. Smoothing a hand down your spine, Jungkook tugs you into his chest.

Half-hard since he entered the closet, Jungkook bites down on your lip to relish the soft noise you make. Slipping his hand beneath the strap of your dress, he bares your shoulder and cups your breast in his palm. Slowly, he teases your nipple with his thumb and listens to your breath hitch.

Head lowered, Jungkook closes his lips around the nipple and tugs. You groan, arching against him in eager invitation. Hand reaching, Jungkook fumbles with your zipper until it catches and pulls. Your dress pools on the ground, leaving you naked except for your heels and panties. Cock swelling at the visual, Jungkook bites lightly on your nipple through lace.

Reaching behind, you undo your bra and let this fall to the floor. With it, the last of Jungkook’s resolve slips away. “You’re beautiful,” he murmurs.

Before you can respond, he lowers his head and sucks your breast again. Teasing you slowly, he relishes the eager rise and fall of your chest. Lowering his hand, he grasps your thigh to wrap firmly around him. Fingers searching, he skims the edge of your wetness and feels you tremble.

Returning to your lips, Jungkook crushes his mouth to yours. Now that you’ve kissed, he can’t seem to stop – especially when he knows this might be the last. Pouring everything he feels into a wordless gesture, Jungkook pulls you to him.

You whimper, shifting to better align your hips to his. Tightening his grip on your waist, Jungkook chuckles and keeps himself just beyond reach. Lazily trailing his fingers in circles, he angles his head to deepen the kiss.

“Jungkook,” you moan against his lips.

He can’t help but smile. “Yes?”

Eyes opening, your expression turns heady. “I need more.”

“More.” Casually, his fingers stroke higher. “Is that what you want from me? Want me to make you come, princess?”

There’s a bite to his words he can’t fully disguise. Jungkook is used to being wanted for his skills in bed. It’s never been something he begrudged before but then, he’s never wanted more from someone else and hearing you say it is like a knife to the chest.

You hesitate, gaze searching. “What do you want, Jungkook?”

Jungkook goes still, scanning your face. He wants more than this. He wants you and you, alone but that can’t possibly be what you mean.

“What… do I want?” he repeats.

“Yes.” You stare up at him, earnest. “You always ask me what I want in bed, but what do you want?”

In bed. Each word is followed by a dull thunk, falling into place alongside the weight of expectation. Obviously, you meant sex – anything more would be ludicrous. You came here tonight with someone else, after all.

Lowering his head, Jungkook skims your throat with his nose. He allows his teeth to graze skin, feeling you shudder and tightening his grip.

“This,” he murmurs, voice cracking in a rare moment of honesty. “Just this.”

Jungkook kisses you before you can see the desperation in his eyes. He backs you against the door, skimming the top of your panties with his rough fingers. You shudder against him, arching your chest and Jungkook takes pity.

Sliding a hand lower, he cups your center and hisses when he feels how wet you are. Slowly, he drags a finger forward – along the damp fabric. One palm on the door, Jungkook repeats this over and over, until you’re a wet, sopping mess.

“Jungkook,” you beg, meeting his gaze.

Jungkook lifts a brow. “Thighs together, princess.”

Hastening to obey, you trap his hand between your warm legs. Flexing his wrist, Jungkook idly strokes along the seam of your panties. A soft moan leaves your lips, head hitting the door while he touches you. Jungkook slowly slips his finger beneath the soft lace.

Brushing the hood of your clit, he savors how swollen you are. How responsive your body is to his touch. Gaze dropping, he takes in the frantic roll of your hips.

“Jungkook,” you moan, and his gaze jerks upward.

“Look at you,” he croons, moving closer. “Already a mess and I’ve barely touched you. Just sucked on those pretty tits like you needed. Tell me,” he says, voice hardening. “Tell me you needed it.”

Deep down, Jungkook knows this is wrong. It isn’t healthy to push things so far, to make you come on his hand when he knows this is over – and yet, he can’t bring himself to stop. If this is all Jungkook gets, he at least wants you to remember.

“I did,” you gasp. “I needed it so bad.”

A muscle ticks in his jaw. “Because no one else gets you like this, huh?”

“N-no one,” you pant, a tremor to your voice.

“What was that?”

“No one but you, Jungkook,” you amend, and he grunts in approval.

“Turn around,” he demands and steps backwards.

You obey, hands pressed to the door as you lower your head. A shiver runs down Jungkook’s spine, seeing how much you trust him. Stepping closer, he eases your legs apart with one hand. Removing your panties, Jungkook lets them fall and presses his hips to your ass from behind.

“Did you bring a condom?” he murmurs, savoring your intake of breath.

Your head tips back a little. “I – no,” you blurt, eyes widening. “I didn’t think of it.”

Satisfaction seeps through his chest when Jungkook realizes you didn’t plan on sleeping with Liam. That’s something, at least. Something he can give you that no one else can.

Chuckling lowly, he caresses your ass – only to bring his palm down. “Didn’t think of it,” Jungkook breathes, dragging two fingers through your dripping sex. “Hm. I don’t believe that.”

“Don’t” – a sharp inhale – “believe what?”

Spanking you again, Jungkook presses you against the door. “I don’t think you forgot a condom,” he murmurs, low in your ear. “I think that you wanted my cum inside you. Is that right? Want me to fuck you raw?”

He pauses, waiting for your reaction before he continues. You let out a whimper, pressing your ass backwards in clear invitation. Fuck. Jungkook nearly swears out loud, consumed by the thought of what it would feel like. Sex without a condom has never been practical for him but now, Jungkook finds himself imagining.

Slowly, he circles your dripping entrance. Sliding his finger inside, Jungkook lets you adjust before he pulls out. “You’re such a dirty girl,” he exhales, adding a second finger.

Pushing backwards, your legs widen slightly to accommodate him. Jungkook slowly moves in and out, stretching your entrance.

“Tell me you don’t want that,” he murmurs. “Me, bending you over and fucking you hard in this closet. Filling you up to the brim with my cum.”

It’s hard for Jungkook to concentrate once the thought has been voiced. If he can’t have you the way he wants to, he can at least pretend. When you moan your approval, it only stokes his flames higher.

“I could do that right now,” Jungkook continues, dropping his voice. “Fuck you so hard, then cum inside this perfect pussy. When I’m done, I’ll tug your panties up, put on your dress and send you back out there. Except” – his voice catches – “I’ll know. And you’ll know that your sweet, little pussy has been used by me. Belongs to me. Is full of me.”

You groan, arching into him while his fingers fill you. The image is provocative, imagining his claim when you return to Liam. Even if you don’t want Jungkook like that, your body clearly does – and Jungkook knows he can satisfy you better than anyone. The thought of his cum dripping down your thigh when you return to your date brings more than a little dark satisfaction.

“Jungkook,” you pant.

“What, princess?” he murmurs, refocusing on the present.

“I – I’m close.”

“Already?” Grazing his teeth against your shoulder, Jungkook quickens his pace. “Let’s give you an orgasm to start, then.”

You whimper, thighs trembling as he pushes you over the edge. It’s not long before you gasp his name, spasming around Jungkook until he withdraws his fingers.

Exhaling slowly, you hang your head. Tugging down his zipper, Jungkook doesn’t waste any time. Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a condom and rips this open. The tear of the packet makes you turn your head.

Dazed, your gaze latches onto the motion. “You… had a condom on you?”

Jungkook smirks and rolls this on. “You seemed to enjoy the idea of my cum inside you.”

Your eyes narrow, but you don’t disagree and Jungkook steps forward to press his cock to your core. Any trace of annoyance vanishes, replaced by desire as he drags his cock up and down. Jungkook nearly swears when he feels how wet you are, rubbing his head against your swollen clit.

Slowly, he leans forward to press you against the door. “Is this what you want?” Jungkook urges, reaching lower to grasp his length with one hand. Casually, he smacks your clit with his cock. “Want my cock inside this needy pussy?”

“God, yes,” you groan as you lower your head.

Hearing this is searing and suddenly, Jungkook doesn’t feel like playing games. “Good,” he agrees and thrusts forward.

You gasp when he enters, gaze focused on the place where he fills you. Jungkook nearly swears when he feels the slickness of your heat, the easy way you envelop him when he slides in. Pausing halfway, he waits until you adjust before pushing further. Slow, easy thrusts until you take his whole length.

Jungkook grunts when he bottoms out, hips pressed snugly against your ass. Refusing to move, he begins to tease your body. Sliding one hand up your torso to cup your full breast in his palm. Casual, he plays with your tit as he starts to thrust – pulling back out, only to slide slowly in.

He does this again and again, memorizing your body until your patience disappears. Taking over the rhythm, you set the pace and push back on his cock. Jungkook allows you to lead before deciding enough is enough and resuming control. Grasping your hip, he presses you to the door and feels you inhale.

Your body melts with his, showcasing your trust and Jungkook nearly breaks. Thrusting forward, he fills you with everything that you crave. You want him to fuck you? So be it. You want him to give you an orgasm? Jungkook will do it. He’ll give you everything you ask, even if it costs him himself.

Touching your body everywhere he can reach, Jungkook feels a building urgency. Playing with your clit, teasing your breast, turning your face sideways to lick up your throat. Savoring your taste, he pounds into your body and hopes against reason you’ll remember tonight.

Based on the way your body trembles, the prospect is promising. Jungkook knows that he’s big. It’s something he’s heard before, but you take him so easily and without complaint. He knows you enjoy the sensation, that you appreciate the feeling of too-fullness he gives. The thought makes him even harder, his cock throbbing with each punishing thrust into your slick heat.

Sliding one palm underneath your knee, Jungkook opens you further and fully lets go. He feels your body constrict, fluttering around him to let him know you’re close.

“That’s it,” he grunts, gripping your jaw to turn your face to his. “Is this what you want? Want me to make you come?”

Silently, he begs you with his eyes to say something different. That you want more than sex, but nothing in your expression seems to understand.

“Yes,” you gasp, eyelashes fluttering. “Yes.”

Pressing his mouth to yours, Jungkook claims you when you come apart. You squeeze him so tightly, he wonders if you somehow know this might be the last time. Forcing himself to continue until your final wave, Jungkook finally comes in a heated shudder.

He stays there for a moment, breath rising and falling against your bare skin. Squeezing his eyes shut, Jungkook imagines briefly this won’t be the end. That he can leave this closet, walk you back to your family and – here, stops the daydream because you came here with Liam.

Slowly, Jungkook withdraws and ties the condom in a knot. Clearing his throat, he fumbles for words while glancing around the closet.

This is the last time. It has to be the last since Jungkook can’t continue to break himself into pieces. Can’t continue to fuck you and send you home to him.

Quietly, you adjust the strap of your dress. Jungkook keeps his hands still, itching to help but convincing himself not to. Every part of his body screams at him to stay, to do something – say something – but he forces himself to stay.

Tucking himself into his pants, Jungkook pulls up the zipper. He feels the weight of your gaze on his cheek, uncertain. When he finally meets your eyes, Jungkook forces his expression to harden. After a moment, he looks past – towards the door.

Something in your posture stiffens. “Jungkook,” you say, sounding wary. “Why are you here?”

The answer rises to his lips, but Jungkook stamps it back down. He came to apologize. To tell you how he felt but all possibilities ended the moment you entered with Liam.

“Are you dating Liam?” Jungkook asks, the words slipping past. Cursing himself for the sudden lapse, he tries not to notice the way you react.

“I… what?”

Jungkook feels his lips tighten. “Are you dating Liam Jessen?”

“We…” You blink, hesitating a moment. “We’ve been on a few dates.”

Neither a yes nor a no, but either way, the words are enough to sink his last hope. Jungkook’s heart drops, and he nods.

Only a few dates is both good and bad. It’s good that the number is small – bad that despite this, you wanted Liam to meet your family. Swallowing hard, Jungkook tastes the scorched earth of his anger. He concentrates on this rather than on sorrow – easier to face you with vitriol in his heart.

Gaze flickering, you step closer. “Jungkook, I –”

“This should probably be the last time we do this, right?”

You freeze, the heat from your body tangible. The look on your face is shock, clear and uncalculated, and Jungkook’s anger swells in response. You have no right to look at him that way – as though he were the villain breaking your heart.

“You…” Dazed, you shake your head. “We what?”

“You and Liam are together, right?” Jungkook asks, the words coming out sharp.

“Together isn’t the word I’d use.”

“Then what word would you use?” His words bleed with frustration, and Jungkook isn’t sure what he’s searching for.

Except that’s not true because he does know. If you said you wanted him, Jungkook would end this right now. He’d say that he wants you, and that he wants things to change. Even while thinking this though, Jungkook knows it’s unfair. He can’t expect you to put your heart on the line when he’s not willing to do the same.

Either way, you say nothing and slowly, Jungkook’s frustration vanishes. Any answer would be preferred to this punishing silence.

“Thought so,” he breathes, grasping for straws. “Wasn’t that part of the rules? We’d fuck until you found someone else to date?”

You recoil slightly, and it takes all Jungkook’s willpower to keep himself still. It’s better this way, he reasons. Better for you to hate him now than peer beneath the surface and see how much he’s hurting.

“That was a long time ago,” you counter. “And that’s not everything I said to you.”

Jungkook suppresses his wince because he knows. He knows things have changed since the night you gave your rules. Remembers with perfect clarity standing in your kitchen and hearing you say Jungkook’s mom would be proud.

He remembers entering your body later that night, cupping your face with both hands to brush his lips against yours. Jungkook knows things have changed and still, he pushes you away because it seems better – safer – than you pushing him first.

“You’re right,” he says, slipping both hands in his pockets. “You also implied things could end if I caught an STD.”

Your brow furrows. “Jungkook,” you say, reaching for him. “Just stop. Let’s –”

“I have feelings for someone,” he blurts.

At this, your hand freezes. Jungkook wishes you would touch, aches for the brush of your skin but forces himself to stay silent. It’s too late for reconciliation – he can tell by the flashes of emotion chasing each other across your face.

Shock, confusion, and where he expects anger, Jungkook finds something far worse – hurt.

“Do… I know her?”

Jungkook’s heart cracks down the middle. He can’t possibly say that you are her. If he did, you’d be forced to choose between him and Liam, and Jungkook already knows how that’d go. Everyone chooses someone else in the end.

“It doesn’t matter,” he says at last.

You stare at him another moment, causing Jungkook to wonder if you see through him. Then, your expression crumples and you withdraw your hand.

“Right,” you whisper.

Jungkook’s resolve falters. “I just… don’t want to drag this out,” he says, and even to his ears, the words sound weak. “I think it would be better to end things now. Before someone gets hurt.”

The words are nearly cause for laughter because it’s much too late for that.

“Right,” you exhale. “Is that why you came here tonight?”

When Jungkook pauses, disappointment settles over your features.

“Well, good,” you say, lifting your chin. “Okay. We said we’d hook up as long as it made sense. If it doesn’t make sense, we should end it.”

Something jerks in his stomach. “Y/N…”

A bitter laugh escapes you, reaching backwards. “Don’t Y/N me.”

“I get that you’re upset, but –”

“Upset?” Your entire body freezes, fury limning your eyes. “I’m not upset, Jungkook – I’m pissed. You avoided me for weeks just to show up at my parents’ party, fuck me in a closet and end this? Which – oh my god,” you say, something like horror crossing your face. “We had sex, Jungkook. What would the woman you supposedly like have to say about that?”

Jungkook’s chest seizes, making breathing difficult. Everything you say is true and already, he can tell he’s going to regret this.

“She’d hate it,” he admits, soft.

You pause, brow furrowing. “Well, okay. As long as you… agree with me?”

Jungkook can only stare at you, helpless. “This is for the best, Y/N. I know that it is. You have Liam, and I – well, I made a mistake coming here. I shouldn’t have followed you in here. Or kissed you. I –”

“That’s enough,” you snap.

Your chest rises and falls, anger barely restrained when Jungkook falls silent. He knows he crossed a line, and truthfully, he regrets nothing except how things are ending. And maybe the way he left your place that one morning.

“I really am sorry,” he murmurs.

“Yeah, well.” You take a deep breath, reaching behind you. “There’s nothing to be sorry for, right? We were casual. Only sex. And now we’re nothing.”

It’s nothing Jungkook hasn’t thought before, but your words skewer him in a way he didn’t think possible. Light from the hall floods the closet when you leave, striping the floor with Jungkook’s own shadow.

He allows you to go, knowing it’s for the best as he drags a hand down his face. Exhaling deeply, Jungkook tries to suppress the tears pricking his eyelids.

Logic which once seemed simple now seems indecipherable. Jungkook thought ending things would be cleaner but now, he’s not sure. Did you really want Liam to meet your parents, or did it happen by chance? More importantly – were you planning to end things with Jungkook?

A sliver of uncertainty enters his thoughts, but Jungkook forces himself to move on. There’s no point in wondering what-if. You two are over. He won’t see you again.

The enormity of this crashes over him and suddenly, it’s hard for Jungkook to breathe. He forces himself to inhale, taking slow, shallow breaths until the feeling passes. Eventually, Jungkook opens the closet door and steps into the hall.

Most of the walk to the car is a blur, only sharpening once he settles into the driver’s seat. Clutching the steering wheel with both hands, Jungkook stares at his knuckles. If you weren’t planning on ending things tonight, that would mean Jungkook has turned into the very person he fears.

Cold, blind, and ultimately – hopeless.

#bangtanarmynet #jungkook fanfic #jungkook smut #bts fanfic #bts smut #jungkook series #bts series

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fabuloustrash05 · 9 months

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Why I Love 2012 Raphael

A TMNT 2012 Character Appreciation/Character Analysis Post

If you know me or follow me here or on Instagram then you know that my favorite Ninja Turtle is Raphael. More specifically, Raphael from the TMNT 2012 series. Nowadays, this version of Raph gets a lot of unfair hate from fans (new and old), which I find to be ridiculous. So I decided to show this turtle in red some love and express my reasons as to why I love 2012 Raphael.

To start, I wanna give some love and appreciation to Raphael’s voice actor, Sean Astin. His voice was perfect for the role. I feel so many other Raphael voices try too hard to make him sound manly and more of a giant muscular brute, often forgetting that he is just a teenage boy. Sean does a good job making Raph sound tough when needed, but still making him sound like he is a teenager. He does a great job balancing Raph’s rude attitude but also his gentle and sweet side as well. Also he nailed those girlish screams! XD I feel voice actors nowadays don’t get a lot of recognition, so I wanted to show my appreciation here.

The biggest thing I love about Raphael is his development in the show. I’d argue he had the most/best character development among the four Turtles. We all know how he is in the beginning of the series, being rude, hotheaded, constantly picking fights with Leo and other characters. The show makes it obvious that Raph in S1-2 is scared of his own emotions and feelings, the only time he truly opens up and expresses himself is when he talks to his pet turtle, Spike. The best way I can describe Raph’s character is that he is the “tough guy with a heart of gold” trope. I believe one of the show’s producers, Ciro Neili, even confirmed that was their intention when creating Raph’s character for the show. Raph is a brute, a hothead, but deep down he's a big softie. A lot of Raphael haters seem to forget or ignore that fact about his character. Yes, he is mostly known throughout the fandom to be the hothead, he is the muscle of the group, but he is also the protector. Raph knows that, so if he comes off as weak, then he loses that title. Deep down Raph, and the people around him, know that he is a big softy who loves and cares for others, but he keeps up this tough guy persona in order to protect and seem strong for the ones he loves most.

As the series goes on Raph learns to open up to others, he grows to respect Leo as a leader and seems to control his temper way more by Season 5. On rewatch I notice in S4-5, Raph only ever gets mad for valid/understandable reasons, mainly when someone is hurting/threatening his loved ones. How did this happen? I believe Raph’s development started when he lost Spike in season 2.

Slash and Destroy is one of my favorite Raphael focused episodes and I will stand by and say that this episode was the beginning of Raph’s character development. In the episode, Raph’s pet Spike gets mutated and becomes Slash, targeting and attacking Raph’s brothers. As a reminder, up to this episode, the only person Raph could express his true feelings to was Spike. Everytime Raph ranted negatively about his brothers, Spike was there to hear it, causing him to have a negative view on Leo, Donnie and Mikey. Slash shows pure hatred for the brothers, especially Leo. After brutally attacking Leo, Slash smiles and says “Been looking forward to that for a long time.” The mutagen warped Slash’s brain, making him go crazy and viciously attack Raph’s brothers because like Raph said earlier in the episode, he doesn’t need them. Raph gets a visual representation of his words and negative thoughts towards his brothers in action through Slash. Slash’s purpose in this episode is to represent all of Raph’s anger and frustration he’s had for his brothers over the years based on what he told Spike. By the end of the episode, Splinter comforts Raph and suggests that he should “focus on the friends he has in the present''. For all of Raph’s life, he trusted and relied only on Spike, but Spike is now gone, so Splinter indirectly advises his son that it is time to trust and rely on others, to not bottle up his emotions, advice that Raph takes.

As the show goes on, Raph slowly progresses, opening up more to others, which will eventually lead to him having two great things in his life come season 4 (but we’ll talk about them later).

Casey was another part of Raph’s development that some fans don’t notice. Donnie makes a comment that Casey being around is like having two Raphaels. While Raph and Casey become best friends because of their similar personalities, Casey is also a reflection of Raph. When around Casey, Raph has to be the level headed one, the responsible one. He criticizes Casey for not being stealthy like a ninja in the S2 episode Newtralized and not planning ahead in the fight (remind you of anyone? *cough* Leo *cough*). When they first meet, Raph gives Casey the same exact advice his father gave him earlier in the episode that “anger is a dangerous alley”. Casey is a more reckless version of Raph, something Raph unknowingly sees and tries to help and protect, he has to be the mature one in their dynamic, opposite to when he’s teamed up with Leo and gets to be the rebel again. It’s like he’s getting a taste of his own medicine.

Not to mention, Raph met Casey after he lost Spike, having a new friend he can rely on. Later on in the episode Newtralized, after meeting Slash, Casey says, “Is that your old pet turtle? The one who got mutated?”. This little piece of dialogue is so important to Raph’s character but it sadly goes over a lot of people’s heads. It indirectly tells us that off screen, Raph has opened up to Casey and told him about a traumatic and hard time in his life. Progress that we will continue to see as the show goes on.

Season 3 Raph at the Farmhouse was the peak of his character development! Raphael took charge in that arc. He became the temporary leader of the group when Leo was out of commission due to his injury. After losing their father (reminder they thought Splinter was dead by this point), being chased out of their home and the city, and losing to one of their greatest enemies, Raph stepped up. He took care of everyone. He made sure that Donnie, Mikey and even April kept up with their ninja training, he was the one who is always prepared during an attack or new threat (ex: when he and the others were trapped in the geyser in the episode Eyes of The Chimera and he was the only one with a grappling hook to help them get out, criticizing his brothers for not being true ninjas and how they should be prepared for anything). April even states that for months, Raph stayed by Leo’s side when he was in his coma, refusing to eat or sleep, and when Leo did wake up, Raph was the first to help him get back on his feet, taking him out on walks to help get his strength back.

Raph not only was there for Leo, but he was there for Donnie. After Donnie gets heartbroken when April rejects his music box gift in the episode A Foot Too Big, Mikey is sympathetic, but Raph hits Donnie with a much needed reality check. He tells him bluntly “It's never gonna happen, Donnie. We're mutants. She's a girl. You're a giant talking turtle. The sooner you get used to it, the better.” Even with that though, Raph acknowledges his brother’s broken heart and quickly tries to cheer Donnie up and get his mind off April with some training. Then later in the episode, when Donnie expresses how uncomfortable he is with Big Foot’s romantic gestures, Raph once again nails it perfectly by telling him, “Now you know how April feels.” Some may say what Raph said was mean and how he should’ve put him down more gently, but in truth this was something Donnie needed to hear and no one else was gonna do it any time soon! Someone had to open his eyes to the situation, and Raph was the perfect candidate.

The final brother dynamic in the farmhouse arc with Mikey and Raph was little when it came to screen time, but Raph still shows how much he loves his little brother after Mikey gets captured by the Punk Frogs in the episode The Croaking. As soon as he sees Mikey, Raph drops everything mid fight to hug his brother, relieved for his safety, though the hug abruptly ends after Raph and Mikey find the situation to be “weird”, a very brotherly response if you ask me XD

With this, we know full well how much Raph loves his brothers. Despite his “lone wolf” attitude in season 1, Raph makes it clear from the very beginning that he does care about his brothers more than anything else in the world. He's loyal, he stays by his brothers' side and has admitted countless times that he would rather die than see them get hurt. "I have no problem risking my own life, but risking my brothers?" (S1 ep14) and he states this again in the next season, “Sorry, Slash. My brothers come first, no matter what.” (S2 ep7). Raph makes it clear (to the audience) that his brothers and his family always come first (so I don’t know why fans keep saying he hates them).

Also, anyone that says that he abuses and is a bully to Mikey needs to go touch some grass because that is a big fat lie and you obviously didn't watch the show (or you're an only child). Brothers are going to fight and pick on each other. That is normal! As someone with an older brother (who is much like Raph btw), I can confirm that siblings to this and in the end we still love each other and have each other’s backs. Out of all the brothers Raph is the most protective of Mikey. The second he learns that Mikey is hurt or someone wants to harm him he is the first going in for the attack or the first one to take action to protect Mikey and bring him to safety.

I mentioned this earlier, but I love how Raph grows/learns to respect Leo as a leader, though he still questions his brother’s judgment from time to time. By season 5, in the episode The Forgotten Swordsman, Raph and Mikey are out on patrol and start talking about Leo. Mikey expresses concern for Leo to which Raph says “He just misses Master Splinter. Being sensei's hard on him. I just wish we knew-”. Raph gets cut off, so we never know what he was going to say, but I headcanon he was going to say “I just wish we knew how to help him.” Raph acknowledges Leo’s growing stress and pressure of being the new sensei after Splinter’s death and he wants to help out anyway he can, but he (and everyone else) just don’t know how. He looks up to and respects Leo and cares about him a lot more than fans and even he himself believe.

Though we see very little moments of them, my overall favorite brother dynamic is Raph with Donnie. I like how Raph is the only brother who is direct and tries to help Donnie move on from his crush on April because he worries and cares for Donnie and knows he’s sensitive when it comes to his feelings. Even when Raph shows disapproval of Donnie’s crush on April, Raph will still be a wingman for Donnie. In the episode Operation: Break Out, after rescuing April’s dad from the Kraang prison, Raph starts hyping Donnie up in front of April to make him look good. Also Donnie refers to him and Raph as “The New A Team” in the episode Arena of Carnage (Mikey does too at one point in another episode, but later he calls him and Raph “Team Awesome”). I just think Donnie and Raph are a fun team and a very underrated sibling duo of “brains and brawn” in the series. It deserves more love and attention from fans.

I’ve talked about how much Raph cares for and is loyal to his brothers, but he is the same towards his friends too. He's protective of April, being the one to go rescue her from the Kraang in the episode The Kraang Conspiracy. He’s even the one who’s words get to April when she was possessed by the alien Za-Naron in the episode The Power Inside Her, reminding April about how much she cares for Donnie which gives her the strength she needed to free herself from Za-Naron’s control. Raph shows he cares for Casey's safety when they do dangerous missions that are out of Casey’s element and was the one who made sure Casey was safe when he was cursed by Alopex’s blade in season 4, and despite their past, Raph is always worried and shows concern for Slash.

Raph shows throughout season 2 that he has faith in Slash to turn to the side of good (something Raph gets proven right about later on). Raph is even one of the first people to trust Slash when he returns with his new team The Mighty Mutanimals in season 3, despite Leo's harsh judgements and suspicion.

The strange thing is, it is usually the other way around, with Leo wanting to make allies and Raph being the distrusting one, a dynamic switch we will see again in season 4…

I can’t make a 2012 Raphael appreciation post/character analysis without talking about the queen herself, Mona Lisa! As mentioned previously, Raph is a softie, and one of the biggest examples of that is when it comes to his relationship with his love interest, later girlfriend, Y’gythgba aka Mona Lisa. When trying to survive on the ice planet, Raph is the only one to suggest that he and the others should team up with the Salamandrians to find the metal they need to fix their ships and get off the planet. Though Raph’s plan is highly motivated by his newfound feelings for Mona, he knows that it is the best option that can help save his family and friends, and despite Leo dismissing the idea, Raph sneaks off alone to convince the Salamandrians himself.

Raph’s feelings for Mona Lisa have always interested me, specifically how he fell for her. Unlike his brothers with their love interests being the cliche “love at first sight”, Raph’s was “love at first fight”. We all know how Raph fell for Mona, they fought each other after a misunderstanding and after one good punch to the face Raph was smitten. He quickly began admiring her strength, acknowledging what a power punch she gave him, and amazed by her skills and spirit as a warrior. Raph admits right from the start that he loves Mona because she's “bigger, stronger and a better fighter than” him. He never once feels that his masculinity is being threatened when around her, and throughout their relationship never told her to not be herself. He loves that she's better than him as a warrior and can beat his shell! He shows excitement at the suggestion of him and her sparring together someday in the episode The War for Dimension X. He adores her, and never cares about others' judgment regarding his relationship with her. When Casey laughs at him after discovering his crush on her, instead of denying his feelings or getting angry at Casey and later the others for mocking him (something we would expect Raph to do), Raph instead continues expressing his romantic interest in her to everyone. He opened up about his feelings to others! If S1 Raph met and fell in love with Mona, I’m convinced he would’ve been a tsundere and just be in denial about it the entire time, not wanting to look soft because he has a crush. Raph met Mona at the perfect time in his life. He has emotionally mature. In truth, I think Mona made Raph a better man and was the key to help him continue his character growth throughout the rest of the series.

A good example of how much Raph has changed and matured is when Mona betrayed him in the episode The Evil of Dregg. Discovering that his first love, the one person he trusted “more than anyone in the galaxy” betrayed him, broke Raph’s heart and his fighting spirit. When Mona pleads for forgiveness, you can understand Raph’s anger and now he’s not quick to forgive her, but even when he’s mad at her he still loves her. Look at Raph right before Mona goes off into battle:

If he was truly mad at her, he wouldn’t be looking back, his back would be fully turned, refusing to have his eyes meet with her’s. He looks back at her but he’s not looking at her with anger or hatred, it’s sorrow. Raph still cares, he’s just hurt at the moment. Because of the betrayal, Raph believes that everything he and Mona have been through meant nothing to her, but then Mona assures him that his doubts are wrong when she tells him that she loves him for the first time, and that’s all Raph needed to hear to bring back his fighting spirit and run into battle to join her. Raph even snaps and tries to kill Lord Dregg after he harmed Mona and shows just how far he’ll go for her if someone ever tries to harm her (he does it again in S5 when Bishop insults Mona, he quickly jumps in to defend “his woman”). By the end of the episode, Raph and Mona reconcile. Him forgiving her shows how much Raph has grown as a character. S1 Raph would never have forgiven her, he would’ve held the grudge and not let go of it, but this Raph knows what Mona did was out of her control, she was blackmailed, so Raph did the mature thing, understood her situation, and forgave her. Him forgiving her shows how strong their love for each other is, and they keep on showing how much they love one another throughout the rest of the series.

Some other little details about Raph’s character that I like is that he's an animal guy. With his first pet Spike and the rooftop pigeons, we see a side of him that everyone else rarely gets to see. This minor trait about his character speaks a thousand words. It shows that he is gentle and caring at heart despite his tough persona he gives out to everyone else. We see this not only with Spike in seasons 1-2, but also later in seasons 4-5 with his new pet, Chompy Picasso.

By the time Chompy enters Raph’s life, he has matured. The purpose for Spike was for Raph to have someone to talk to about his feelings and express himself without judgment. Spike was like a therapy dog. Chompy however is not that. Raph has learned to open up by this point in the story, so he doesn’t need Chompy to talk about his personal problems and frustration as much as he had with Spike. Yes, Chompy is there to listen to Raph but at this point in the story Raph is open and expressive and not afraid to show his feelings to others. Raph has probably mention things to Chompy he still wouldn’t say to others (like in The Tale of Tiger Claw, he talks about Mona Lisa to Chompy, seeming that this isn’t the first time he’s done this), but Chompy isn’t a pet for Raph to vent to, instead he was a way for Raph to learn a new responsibility. Chompy is just a baby who just needs someone to love him, to look after and care for him, and Raph is that someone. He took a big responsibility to take care of Chompy after it was believed that his mother, Tokka, was killed. Raph doesn’t need another therapy dog, no, Chompy needs a caregiver, and when Tokka returns to take back her baby, she sees how much Chompy loves Raph and decides that it is better for him to stay on Earth with Raph where she knows he will be safe. I will always stand by this: Raph needed Spike, Chompy needed Raph.

This is probably an unpopular opinion, but I think Raphael is more similar and a parallel to Splinter than Leonardo is. Leo may be Splinter’s “best pupil” and next in line to be sensei for the Hamato Clan, but Splinter and Raph have a lot more in common than the show’s canon or even the fandom acknowledge and it hurts to think of the wasted potential. Raph obviously inherited Splinter's temper. We see in flashbacks that when Splinter was a young man he had an uncontrollable temper that Shredder could easily manipulate, and we still sometimes see that temper blow up in the show when Splinter is upset and disciplining his sons. There’s more similarities though than just them both being hotheaded. They both have a love and appreciation for art. Splinter mentions in Lone Rat and Cubs that he always wanted to be an artist, and it’s well known he loves the renaissance artists. Raph being an artist is a cute and fun little detail about his character that I really like and you see many times in the show, but fans barely acknowledge. He’s the one who painted the Venus pin up girl on the Party Wagon, he gives his girlfriend the nickname “Mona Lisa” (which he indirectly tells her that every time he calls her Mona Lisa he is reminding her that she is a beautiful work of art), and names his pet "Chompy Picasso" after the artist Pablo Picasso. Not to mention that both men know the pain and fear of the woman you love dying in your arms. I love Raph’s relationship with Splinter in the show, and it’s honestly way more interesting than Leo and Splinter’s.

I love their little “Spike, chew on your leaf…” bit in season 1 and how they bond over the Japanese mantra to help Raph overcome his fear of insects in season 4 (btw Raph being scared of bugs was so fun, I like the trope of the big strong dude being scared of something so small and harmless). The episode ends on a fun note, Splinter tells Raph to not tell the others of the mantra cause he “might use that trick on them one day”, showing that Splinter has a devious fun side to him similar to Raph’s.

Is 2012 Raphael perfect? Not at all. No character is. He still has flaws, but I feel that’s what makes him such a fun character still. I feel he had the best and most character development in the series. I love his voice actor, I love his character development, I love his relationship with his brothers, friends and girlfriend, I love all the little character details about him from his love of animals to his passion in art. It’s just my personal opinion, but I think 2012 Raph is the best version of Raphael. He has faced injustice in this day and age with fans misrepresenting his character and hating him for the wrong reasons. You don’t have to like him, everyone has their own opinions on certain characters and I respect that, but there’s a time when not liking him goes too far with saying he’s a bully and abuses his family. The haters can go argue with a wall, 2012 Raphael is the best and I love him, and I hope this post made you appreciate him a little bit more too <3

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