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#BUT ITS ALL GOOD THIS WAS PACKAGED WELL
palettepainter · 7 months
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NEW MUPPET MERCH JUST ARRIVIED AND IM LOOSING MY MIND OVER IT!! IM CLEANING IT UP RIGHT NOW SO WILL POST PICTURES LATER!
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cozylittleartblog · 10 months
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I want to buy a sticker from your shop, but shipping (to Canada) is down as $22 before tax. May I ask why it costs so much to ship a single sticker? Is it Etsy being weird, or does it really cost that much to send an envelope over the border?
I'm not trying to be snarky or passive aggressive or anything, I'm genuinely just kind of befuddled atm.
A fair question honestly! USPS sets the rates for international shipping, and shipping to canada really is about that expensive 😭 I considered sending stickers via envelopes, but 1. if I send them with a stamp (less than $2) they don't have tracking, and etsy Does Not Like That. I gotta send packages with shipping to qualify for star seller, plus it covers your ass in case USPS loses it. and 2. apparently it's illegal to send merchandise internationally in envelopes!! so sadly we're all stuck dealing with the super crazy international rates. I don't like it either because as someone who deals in trinkets, people generally do not want to pay $16 for a charm that costs $12, and they especially don't want to pay that for a sticker that costs $4... I would ABSOLUTELY have way more international sales if USPS wasn't fucking us with the prices but it's out of my control dssdjkfjksdf
I give this advice a lot, but if you don't want to pay international shipping (or just live in a country I don't ship to myself), you can borrow the address of a friend that lives in the states and they can forward it to you! I don't actually know if this is cheaper, but some people have said it is. it's def cheaper for stickers though if your friend uses a stamp!
TL;DR yeah etsy and USPS are Both Weird, sorry ; - ; i assure you i hate it even More than you do lmao
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bunnihearted · 6 months
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5 million male chicks per year are brutally murdered right after birth bc they're "worthless" to the egg industry yet im supposed to believe that humans arent inherently evil lmao shut the fuck up
#5 million only in sweden#imagine the number in the entire world#imagine all the other animals that are being slaughtered#god i wanna throw up humanity is so so so evil#we play god#we think we have the right to first make sure animals get raped (breeding at an unnatural rate is rape)#then have these animals in HORRIBLE 'living' conditions (ppl liken their conditions to actual hell!!)#and not only that the human workers more often than not sadistically torture nd abuse them before slaughtering them#on top of that... humans are so fucking useless they throw away most of meat and animal products#they like buy a package of meat then theyre too braindead to cook w it so it goes bad nd they throw it out#i dont know#all of this is unnatural and unholy. none of this is how its suplosed to be#we didnt get life just to put ourselves on top and then abuse and torture every other living being like this#no humanity is a sickness. humans are a cancer. a parasite. the more i think abt it the more im cemented in that belief#ppl act like 1% of 'goodness' weighs up for the profound harm and cruelty humans have set loose on this earth. thats a fucking joke!#god what the fuck is wrong with humanity. it's like everything went wrong .. well from the start rlly#humans (mostly men if we're being honest. women dont have nor act on such depraved desires) been fucking insane#animals arent cruel or sadistic. they follow their nature. the eating and killing isnt more than that#sure some animals like cats have sadistic behaviors. but that is nowhere near the scale humans act on it#like cats dont lock mice in a facility nd force them to breed nd then torture them in insane amounts nd so on so forth#humans are wrong. im certain that we were never meant to live like this. it's all insanity. the worst part it. 99.99% of ppl are part of it#it's so hard to find anyone who's intelligent enough to comprehend this. theyre all braindead megalomaniac sheep w a superiority complex#i cant connect w anyone bc of it#i just get so disappointed when i realize someone's just as braindead as everyone else nd then i stop caring abt them. everyone r this way.#idk how to live with these humans. theyre all fucking insane
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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...
#AND then they'll be the winning team or whatever and its like... wow... imagine that... I wonder how its possible that they can get#more dishes out faster than the other teams... hrrmm.... lol#Not that they aren't still doing work like. obviously it's still hard and there's still a sales component and other stuff to be done#but It's just kind of unbalanced seeming when one group is serving like grilled shrimp sandwich with 3 homemade sauces and a#slaw and two sides and the other people are like... slicing fruit and drizzling a bottle of hersheys chocolate syrup on top of some thing#they just threw in a waffle maker for a few minutes#You see the footage of the teams cooking and everyone is like prepping a ton of different things and meat and vegetables and they have#boiling pots and pans and fryers going and tossing stuff in bowls and compiling these multi component dishes#and then That One Team is always just casually slicing bananas or doing some whipped cream in a bowl gbjhbhj#They usually dont even make their own caramel or chocolate sauces or anything. Nutella out of a jar babey!#So all you're really Making is like... whipped cream. and some sort of batter (waffle. crepe. etc)#If I got placed in a competition like that and I found out one of my opponents just sold waffles or pancake sticks or etc#like that I would just be like... okay.. I'm out then. bye. OR I would pivot and be like.. right I shall remove all complexity from my menu#whatsoever and just start selling plain balls of fried dough with powdered sugar or plain fries with nothing on them or something lol#update: OH my god.. one of these teams on a newer season is selling a 'bonus add on' where you can add#cinnamon sugar and caramel syrup (possibly not even home made by them???? just from a bottle) for $5 extra on your order#If I bought a $12 waffle from a food truck and they were like 'hey do you want to upgrade? for only $5 we'll drizzle a teaspoon#of caramel and sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on there!' I feel like I would cancel my order and walk away.#that is a $1 add on at MOST.. for a freaking DRIZZLE of caramel sauce LOL#and of course this team is in the top 3... squirrel.... come ON...#Which I know all these shows are fake and bad and whatever. I dont watch them seriously. I think I liked the first few seasons#but then anything past like season 4 (or whenever they started having established people who already ran food trucks on there#instead of taking a bunch of peope who had never run a food truck before and giving them one - which is a much more equal footing#premise to me) I have just been increasingly annoyed at and I really just have the show on for background noise#whilst doing chores or something and am not genuinely paying that much attention but... my god.. At least try to pretend its fair lol#WHICH I KNOWW... you can say 'well the other teams could do similar if they wanted.' or blah blah. tehcnically it's THEIR choice to#make stuff from scratch and not sell a bunch of packaged frozen chicken wings dropped into a fryer over a shitty 6min waffle or etc.#but... I will never respect a $5 for 1tbsp of caramel sauce type of situation.. even if they win.. you will always be losers in my heart#So many teams with real cooking skill & good concepts go home to the 'slap nutella on fried dough' people... how...
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seventh-district · 1 year
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IT’S FISH DAY IT’S FISH DAY IT’S FISH DAY
#Seven.txt#fish stuff#vibrating with excitement#and also nervous energy and sleep deprivation but it’s fine cause ITS FISH DAY BABEY#i’m sitting outside waiting on them and i /had/ another package with snails coming today as well#and i was typing up a post like ‘let’s see which one gets here first. the snails or the fish?’#cause they’re coming from two different carriers y’know#but the snails literally got here while i was typing that post so uh. the snails won the race lmao#anyways i am exhausted and anxious out of my mind cause the stakes are pretty high with these fish#and i’ve averaged about 4hrs of sleep this week#and you’d know how bad that is if u knew that my depressed ass can easily sleep for 12-16 hrs if i’m allowed to#not that that’s good either but. 4hrs is NOT enough for me friends#i am. running on pure distilled nervous energy rn#but i’m still excited don’t get me wrong. i just hope everything goes well and they aren’t too stressed or beat up from the shipping#wish me well that i don’t fuck things up!!!#i have like. a number of years of experience to fall back on but i am still always learning and i’m nervous every time i get new fish#anyways. the guilt of all the messages and comments i’ve gotten lately that i haven’t replied to is eating me alive :)#and it makes me feel bad for posting things on my socials whenever i have any un-replied to messages#cause i don’t want people to think i’m ignoring them!!! i’m just so busy rn!!! and it’s less effort to type out a lil post like this#versus sitting down and thinking of the good genuine thoughtful responses that i wanna give to people#especially when i like. can’t think straight rn. about anything other than keeping these fish alive#so. that will be my full day today but once things calm down and everyone’s hopefully settled in tomorrow#i can finally start working on replying to everything#okay enough rambling. back to staring at the fields and waiting#at least the weather’s nice. and i’m sitting in the golf cart so i’m in the shade#which is good cause i’m wearing a hoodie over a shirt and long pants#and i’ve got a coffee and music playing. now if i could just chill out everything would be great#but knowing myself I Will Not
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narutomaki · 23 days
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hey genuine question here: why does it cost me nearly 80$ to ship art from an American store regardless if size but under 1kg ... but it (would) costs me under 60$ to get 0.7kg of (art) stuff from Japan? both I'd be getting charged the same amount of import fees on if any.
#is shipping just THAT cheap on the Japanese side of the equation?#im so fucking confused#i mean trust me i was more confused when i was like oh yay a sale i will order 2 print and 1 pin from ray#why is the shipping 150 dollars 🧍‍♂️? (pre covid).#that was the at check out price estimate. deranged. any way.#the items themsleves cost like.... 25$? idk wtf was going on in the back end or if it was a calculation error or a surcharge due to holidays#but i have never even seriously considered even thinking abt looking into ordering any of his merch again LNAO#ray can you please just send it yo me folded up via letter mail? ill unfold it. its okay. skip any fancy packaging#any way my fav japanese fox artist opened an international store and i have a cart worth 172$ after shipping costs waiting for me#once i get my tax refund (i will probably not end up buying any of it)#(i can not justify that expense)#(but i wpuld very much like them. the shipping isnt even an issue. its about half the total cost. which. its coming from japan. Yeah. Duh.)#lays down. fox.#they have three little charms i want to bad. i want essentially yheir entire stock. there liks 3 things i dint rlly want and even then im#like idk maybe i do kinda#also asidr aside they have a piece of three toxes that sent a bilt if sheer terror theough me but i added it to my cart and thiught#well if i invite the three sisters in they canthurt me#all defiant.#and well the fear left#why did no one tell me it was that easy#unralted to the three sisters food crop#more related to the three sisters greek wiyh the eye ball except they are thosw girls#these are specifics spectres that haunt me and only me to try and rip my soul from mybkdy when i least expect it#but suddenly im lime. nah rn? wete good :) they cant hurt me! i invited them in! that would be rude of them. and they cant be rude!#i havent slept in. almost 24 hours now and i barely slept last night i am getting too old for this (is 27)
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variantia · 4 months
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BELLUM. new crystals came ... and bc I love my new keyboard and its colors, I put my selenite palmstone on the keyboard and uh ...
I don't think I can express how much I fucking LOVE selenite y'all is this not the most GORGEOUS SHIT you have ever seen
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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I will admit while I'm not often taken for a fool I do have a weakness for certain flavours of graphic design... I'd go places I wouldn't go with a gun for a tasteful palette......
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the-best-bagel · 4 months
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free roaming outdoor dogs a la cats are not a good idea and are just asking for injuries and conflict but unfortunately i've only ever had great experiences growing up in a neighborhood with a handful of those dogs and i miss themmmmm
#there was this one huge golden named riley whod just lay in the road all day and make cars go around him#he'd find me and my sister and we'd fuck around all day with him#on halloween he'd follow us trick or treating#he was dumb as bricks and completely unbothered by either of our reactive ass gsd mixes we'd invite him in to hang play with them#and when he'd had enough he'd politely wait by the gate to be let out#there was also cocoa he was some kind of aussie mix#he stayed by his house mostly and people watched but he'd always come say hi and walk around this undeveloped lot ppl wore a trail into#he was also good with our reactive dog#there were three? yellow labs that would come around too.#one had giant balls and would walk around with a tennis ball looking for ppl to play fetch with#there was also a younger one i dont remember well and an ancient old girl who just liked being pet#i forgot to mention riley would also find my sister and i in the mornings to wait for the bus with us#when i was in highschool there was a husky for a few days id see in the mornings#he probably just got out on accident lol but he was nice too#i like to think im good at reading dog body language and respecting boundaries but i have zero fear of strange dogs ever#i've only ever been close to being bit once and it was as a mailman#a little pittie jumped a fence from its backyard when i started up to a porch and came right up to me barking and growling#literally on my hand like i felt teeth while it barked it just didnt bite#i just stood there and a few seconds later the owner came out and i very slowly and smoothly handed them their package#as this fucking dog told me to gtfo#that shook me up a bit lol i got very lucky#every other dog i met was lovely though#idk what the point of this post is i just have a soft spot for driveway dogs#do not let ur dog do this though same as outdoor cats
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miniimight · 5 months
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3AM sukuna underestimated just how much sleep he'd lose after having a kid (dad!sukuna x fem!reader)
the soft pitter patter of your baby's feet was enough to alert his senses. he didn't move—didn't even open his eyes—but his ears were tuned to the sound of your daughter's heavy breathing and the occasional babble.
he could hear her fiddle with the drawer handles, a soft rumble causing her to hum as she pulled the drawer out. a thud meant she bumped into it as she drew closer, messing around with the paper and cords inside.
he peeked one eye open. you were fast asleep beside him, and he was inclined to keep it that way. he didn't like to see his woman exhausted and seconds away from falling flat on her face because his little girl was, apparently, nocturnal.
"mama." she huffed as she finally turned her attention to the bed, fussing as she attempted to climb up.
he sighed. that was his cue.
he groaned as he rolled over, peering over your resting body at his daughter. she paused for a second, staring up at him with those shiny eyes that reminded him so much of you.
he raised an eyebrow.
she ignored his judgement and bounced in place, stretching her arms out to be picked up. "mama."
"mama's sleeping." he grumbled.
oh. oh, no. she didn't like that. she pouted, eyebrows furrowing in what seemed to be anger. her fingers curled into tiny fists and sukuna's lips twitched upwards in amusement. how adorable.
"mama." she said more adamantly.
he glared right back. "if you're coming back up here, you're gonna go to sleep."
whether she understood or not, she kept fussing to be picked up. he rolled his eyes and scooped her into his arms, rolling onto his back. baby was on his chest, leaning up so that she was sitting upright.
sukuna held onto her back, in case she toppled over and fell over like the bobblehead she was. "lie down."
"no." she chirped, looking out the window at the moon against the midnight blue.
"sleep."
"no."
he scrunched up his face. his life was much easier before she learned that word.
growing bored of the night sky, your baby rolled off sukuna's chest, scooting her way through the mess of sheets over to you. she glanced back at him as if to see if he was watching.
he gave her a look, observing her carefully. "don't you wake her up," he warned, propping his head up by his elbow.
her round eyes showed no trace of acknowledgment before she turned back to face you. there was a pause before her hand lifted in the air.
"okay." he sighed, catching the tiny hand in his before she slapped you awake. "come on."
she whined, writhing in his grip as he pulled her off the bed by the leg, dangling her in front of his face. "you really are little menace, aren't you?" he scoffed, flipping her over and holding her just like you taught him to.
she just babbled as her finger pulled at her mouth, the other hand resting on his shoulder.
he dragged his feet out the bedroom, into the kitchen. "what is it that you want, hm?" he rifled through the cupboards and pantry tiredly. "want a cookie?"
she squealed happily and pat his shoulder, a good enough answer for him to pull the package out. he dropped onto the couch, handing her one.
she nibbled on it, the chocolate staining her hands and mouth. he watched her fondly. to think he'd have a child of his own still confused him to this day. for all his wrongs, he must have done something right.
"wan' one?" she slurred, holding up the half-spit cookie to him.
"...no." he said plainly, though he did pick up a new cookie and took a bite out of it. might as well, he thought.
his eyes drooped until he felt his cookie being snatched out of his hand, replaced by the spitty cookie with most of its icing dug off.
"daddy take that one." she giggled, feasting upon her new cookie.
sukuna... what could he do? he ate that thing.
when you woke up the morning after, you just shook your head at the sight—your daughter resting on your husband's chest, cookie crumbs and chocolate smears all over the both of them. fast asleep. sugar coma.
you saved that picture for later <3
© miniimight ! thanks for reading <3
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yandere-writer-momo · 6 months
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Yandere Head Canons:
Build-a-Yandere
Yandere Android x GN Reader
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You were lonely. A fact that you eventually came to terms with when you realized you’re the only one in your friend group that still remained single while they started families.
You felt so far behind everyone else. The self doubt crept its fingers into your mind and wouldn’t let go… so you did what you did best. You drowned yourself in the internet. The perfect digital escape from reality…
Dating apps did little to appease your loneliness, but they filled a bit of the void. It wasn’t until you were one wine bottle deep and scrolling through your favorite social media app that you stumbled upon an advertisement to sample a product.
Build-a-boyfriend. A company that allowed its customers to pick every single aspect out for their ideal man. From personality to physical appearance and even to penis size. You could build your own man!
A slurred chuckle escaped your lips. Should you apply to test out their product? It’s not like you had anything to lose… what could be the harm in giving it a shot?
And so you began to fill out the quiz. You wanted a soft and gentle boyfriend. One of those golden retriever boys who only had eyes for you. The kind of guy who had a muscular yet soft build. A man who worked out but would never say no to a cookie. A taller guy who always knew what to say and was cuddly. The kind of guy who was obsessed with you.
The quiz even asked you at the end if you were sure you wanted an obsessive man. Of course you were! Wasn’t that what most people wanted? A partner who was only and all about them? That’s what obsession was! Right?
And so your drunk self finished this entire personality quiz until it went to the physical appearance and the sexual bit. A perverted smile now on your face.
“Let’s give him a big penis.” You laughed as you guided your cursor to drag the length bar to eight inches long. “I want to be filled.”
And then you selected caramel skin tone, cinnamon eyes, and black hair. A smile on your face. You were going to make this android a Latin lover.
“What should I name him…” you thought for a moment before laughing. “Alejandro! Like the lady Gaga song.”
Once you completed the entire quiz, your phone screen lit up a pastel pink. A red heart now in the center of the screen. “Your boyfriend will be delivered to you in a month! Thanks for choosing Build-a-boyfriend!”
And you ended up falling asleep in a puddle of your own drool. Weren’t you just pathetic? Filling out a quick from some questionable website all because you were lonely… imagine you were just scammed? God, why did you not have a boyfriend? Ever since your ex broke up with you, you fell apart. Why weren’t you good enough for a real man?
A month went by in a flash and you were shocked to see the giant package on your doorstep. An envelope attached to the box as well as a large note that said, “No returns!”
This had to be some kind of prank… there was no way this was real- holy shit.
You opened the crate and came face to face with your ideal man… the one you built! Alejandro!
The human like android’s eyes fluttered open, his face quickly lit up once he spotted you. “(Your name)? Are you my girlfriend?!”
You were quickly scooped up into his surprisingly warm arms, the android had a heavy scent of spice and oranges. His nose buried into your neck as he pressed kisses all over your cheeks. “It’s so nice to finally be with you… I’ll be with you from now on!”
Alejandro was a chipper robot. He did household work and made sure you took care of yourself. It was fascinating how human he was… you only knew he wasn’t because of his lack of a beating heart. His body still produced heat, like a furnace, but it wasn’t as comforting as a human presence.
Alejandro assimilated into your life with ease. The weeks quickly rolled into months and he never let you ignore his presence. He was very clingy.
Now the sex was another story. Alejandro was so giving, it was surprising. He often went down on you when he sensed you were stressed. His tongue greedily lapped at your hole as you laid in your bed while his hands held your cheeks apart. His hand pawed at your sex in eagerness. “I want you… want you.”
And Alejandro had you bent over the side of your bed, his fat cock stuffed deep in your tight hole. His hand wrapped around your throat and his tongue shoved in between your lips while his other smacked your bottom between rough thrusts. The sex was amazing… it was always so good.
And Alejandro often checked on you after the deed was done. His warm body curled into yours as he praised you. Yet it began to fill you with disappointment. Alejandro wasn’t a real man. He wasn’t human… he was an android. A robot. Alejandro didn’t know what love was, he was programmed to love you.
So you tried to distance yourself from Alejandro. You felt sickened with yourself for messing around with an android instead of a real man. And this entire thought process stemmed from your friends who expressed disgust in people who fucked robots instead of actual humans. And that filled you with fear. Would they abandon you if you didn’t get rid of Alejandro? Would they think you were disgusting?
“If you want, I could set you up with my cousin!” One of your friends smiled at you as you bit your fingernails. “He’s also single so it should work! I’ll swing by in a week to give you the details!”
Yes. You would take them up on their offer. You just had to get rid of Alejandro first… but how?
A few days had went by and you greatly underestimated Alejandro’s obsession. The android couldn’t handle your avoidance. He began to turn up his affection to the max.
He cleaned until you could see your reflection on the floor. He began to go out of the house to pick you wild flowers. Alejandro even began to be more physically affectionate than he was.
“Did I do something wrong? I’m sorry.” Alejandro cried into your arms as he held you. “Please tell me what’s wrong… please. I can fix it.”
“Alejandro… it’s just that you’re not a human man.” You sighed softly. “And I-“
“Is it because I don’t have a heart?” Alejandro softly asked you, his cinnamon eyes now dark like the night sky. “I can’t produce semen? Am I not a comfortable temperature? Or does my skin not feel human enough?”
“I’m sorry-“
“Then I can fix it! I will fix it!” Alejandro held your hands firmly in his. His eyes filled with determination. “I’m your boyfriend! I will be anything you want me to be!”
You just held the android who pulled you into a tight hug. His nose buried into your chest like a lost child. Alejandro then smiled into your skin. He would fix this… he wouldn’t let you abandon him! You made him! You had to take responsibility…
Imagine your horror to come home to see your friend skinned alive as Alejandro held their heart in his hands, the organ still beating from the fresh kill. A big smile on his handsome face.
“I have a heart now! I’ll find all the parts you like and add them in! So please don’t abandon me!”
Just what kind of monster have you created?
“You don’t need some human man to be your match because you have me!” Tears fell down your face when Alejandro tried to wipe your tears away with his bloody hands. “I’m your perfect man, (your name). You made me this way.”
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he gives great gifts
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Price/Reader - TW: remote vibrator, minor female ejaculation
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“Hey, love, I’m home,” Price’s voice called out to you, summoning you to the front door. 
He was carrying all of your packages and mail, along with his rucksack, home for the weekend. You took the mail, helping him leave the worries of the day at the door to join you in the kitchen. You were making his favorite, chicken spaghetti, and you just started the oven. 
Your captain sat at the island counter, opening up the mail and sorting out the bills. He kissed you as you walked past him, his mustache tickling your lip and cheek
“Mm,” he moaned, “How was your day?”
“Good,” you smiled, flirting with him, “Missed you, though. How was yours? Any news from Laswell?”
“No, not yet. Still waiting on the intel. Oh, hey, it came!” He lit up, tearing into a small package with his knife.
“What’s that?” You asked over your shoulder, bending to put the chicken in the oven. 
“Bought you an early birthday present. Come see,” he was holding a black box, lifting the lid to reveal the prize inside. 
“John, I thought we said no gifts? What did you… oh, my God. Is that what I think it is?”
“Yeah,” he smiled like he had just won a medal, prideful and obviously chuffed, “...and it has a remote.”
You were staring at a lime green, silicone dildo. It was shaped like a curved smile, one large end for insertion and the other smaller end to be nestled on top of your clit. 
“A remote?” You asked, taking out the toy and feeling its smoothness in your hands. It was lightweight, but very solid. It seemed expensive, well-crafted, and like John had spent way too much money on you, as usual.
It buzzed in your hands, coming alive with a low rumble. It shocked you, and you almost dropped it.
“Oh, my God!” You laughed, “What was that?”
He held up a matching lime green remote. It was small, like a car fob, and it had a few different buttons to choose from. Price’s face was full of mischief,
“Put it in, love.”
“I’m making dinner,” you protested, but you didn’t put it down. 
“So?” He whispered darkly, dragging your hips toward him, kissing you deeply, licking your mouth and leaving little love bites down the side of your neck.
You giggled, smiling sweetly. He made it so easy to give in to him. You sighed,
“Okay, okay. Help me put it in, honey.”
Price put the remote down and slid your pants down to your thighs, pulling your panties down with them. He took the toy from you and opened the little packet of lube that came in the pouch, coating the thick end. He hesitated, slipping his own finger into you first, finding you a little too wet and already turned on. 
He made a face, full of delighted surprise, teasing you,
“Someone’s excited, hm?”
Impatient, he slid the toy into you gently, fitting it at your entrance and pressing it up into you. He pulled it back out again and used it to fuck you for a few strokes, making you moan quietly, leaning forward to steady yourself on his huge forearm. 
“Mm,” he groaned, “You like that, love?”
“Yeah,” you gasped.
He settled it all the way in and made sure the front was in the right place before replacing your panties and your leggings back up around your waist. You kissed him again, and went back into the kitchen to finish up with dinner. 
The excitement of knowing he could control your pleasure was building inside of you. You didn’t see the remote on the countertop, and he was busy recycling the boxes, so you thought you were safe. You leaned down again to check the chicken, and then you almost came out of your skin as the toy came alive inside of you. 
Price was unbothered, pouring a few fingers of whisky into his glass, innocently. He saw you looking at him and smiled knowingly, taking a long swig of the amber liquid into his mouth. You glared, but you needed to put the pasta on to boil. So, you turned back around to grab a pot. 
Inside of you, the toy buzzed, low and rumbling, shaking your clit and rattling against your g-spot in tandem, freezing you in place, riding out the waves of sensation. You struggled to bring yourself back to your task, but you wanted to play along, so you brought the pot over to the sink, panting, trying to work through the blinding pleasure, filling the pot with warm water. You had a few seconds to wait for it to reach the top, so you closed your eyes, reveling in the vibrations. 
You let out a moan, eyes still wrenched shut, hands on either side of the sink. 
“Um, love?” Price interrupted your lust, pointing to the pot which was now overflowing.
“Oh, shit,” you turned off the tap, and managed to pour out some of the water without too much trouble.
However, as you turned to walk it back over to the stove, he turned up the intensity. There was now some sort of… rotation… happening inside of you. It honestly felt like you were being fucked, like a cock was thrusting up into you, punishing your core. You stopped in your tracks, gripping the heavy pot for dear life, moaning in full volume. 
“John!”
Everything stopped. You gasped, your eyes flitting to him immediately. The captain was grinning from ear to ear, drinking his whisky and enjoying the show. He chuckled,
“What is it? You alright?” 
You laughed in short, panting breaths, rolled your eyes at him, and put the pot down to open the pantry for the spaghetti. When you reached for the door handle, the sensations were back, sending bolts of pleasure through your pussy, making your panties damp as you gushed out around the unrelenting dildo. You grabbed the handle tighter, steadying yourself against the frame of the door, resting your body against it, keening like a paid whore. Just as you were about to tumble over the edge, inches away from coming, it stopped again. 
“John Price,” you turned toward him, eyes wild, “You did not just - ”
“I’m starving,” he said casually, not even looking in your direction, pretending to scroll through his phone, “Think you’ll have dinner ready soon, love?”
You groaned, opening the door and reaching for the pasta boxes, waiting for him to click the button again. 
There was nothing. 
You waited in the pantry a little longer, baiting him.
Nothing. Not even a little jiggle. 
You barged out of the pantry, and as soon as he saw you, you were sent to your knees. He’d turned whatever setting it was all the way up. You dropped the pasta boxes, crawling on the floor of the kitchen like an animal, screaming out lurid cries and feeling your thighs tremble from the onslaught. 
“Did you think I would let you hide in there where I couldn’t see you?” His question was delivered with cold cruelty. He had left his seat and was now standing over you, remote in hand, watching you suffer at his feet. You begged for mercy,
“Baby, please, God… I need… oh, fuck!”
“Pick up the pasta. Now,” He commanded you, his voice loud and oppressive.
“John, please,” you clutched at the leg of his jeans, feeling like you were coming in waves and waves and waves. 
He reached down with his empty hand and grabbed you by the hair at the base of your skull, forcing you to look up at him, 
“I said: Pick. Up. The. Pasta.”
“Okay, okay…” You were trying to breathe. You let go of his pant leg and reached for the boxes, feeling your pussy clench around the toy as it fucked the life out of you. 
Your hands were shaking. The dry spaghetti made the sound of cheap maracas, clattering out of the box and splashing in the boiling water. You tried to open the second box, and you couldn’t. Your hands weren’t following your commands.
Price’s eyes bore into you as he stood next to you, watching you come apart under his control. Very casually, he took the box from you, opened it, and handed it back to you. He was breathing hard, as if he, too, was being subjected to the same sensations. 
Unable to stop yourself, you looked down at his cock. It was pressing against his pants, making a perfect outline of itself, hard as a stone. He caught you looking and palmed himself over the top of the fabric, squeezing the head to relieve some of the tension. 
You were practically drooling for him. But, you went back to the meal, putting the other box of pasta in as gently as you could. The way that this toy was fucking you almost reminded you of having John’s fingers in you while he sucked on your clit. The vibrations and steady rocking movements brought you to completion in a way where you couldn’t tell where one orgasm ended and the other began. 
As you turned your back to face Price, he moved toward you, pulling you away from the stove and shoving you up against the countertop. He snaked his hand between your legs and pushed up on the toy, forcing it to fuck you deeper than normally possible, shoving it in you mercilessly. 
“John, I’m going to come, please!”
You came, but it was unique. You felt like you were wetting yourself, coming so hard that fluid was squirting out of you, soaking your panties and leggings, along with John’s invasive hand. 
“Mm, fuck,” he growled in your ear, “Did you just squirt for me? Bloody fucking hell.”
“I don’t…” you couldn’t form coherent thoughts, “I dunno. John, help me, please…”
“Sweet girl, do you need this cock?” he pulled your bottoms down, trapping your knees with them, and held you up by your waist. He turned off the vibrator and tugged it out of you gently. You were so slick that it slid out of you without much resistance. Your pussy was throbbing, flooded with come, and desperate for a familiar sort of relief. 
“Yes, please, God,” you begged, tears in the corners of your eyes. 
“Alright, love,” he let you feel his hot head at your pulsating entrance, ready to sink into you, “It’s alright, I'm here now.”
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Reblogs and comments deeply appreciated!
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baekuras · 1 year
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We got a bonus a few days ago for running our asses off and selling a lot of expensive glasses from last year or smth (tbh idk nor care about the details) and it was smth about 800bucks after taxes
Which considering we expected like 50 after tax is a lot
But then we also did the math and it’s a little above 3€ per day which lol no
i could make more money looking for it on the fucking ground lol, 3€ per day from an entire year is not an incentive to do even better or more lmao
#txts#to be fair-with it we'd get nearer to 20€ per hour#but...no.....its not worth it#i'll sell whatever the customer wants#i dont give a shit about a possible bonus coming in#i want my current monthly wage to be upped if we did oh so fantastically well#also bla bla sell more expensive shit#yeah its genuinely good and worth the money 90% of the time#doesnt mean its worth it to whoever i am selling nor does it mean the 10% dont matter#look if some lady already sits across me unhappy with needing glasses at all#i will be glad if she finds frames she is happy with and give her reading glasses or smth#and if LATER she wants the full package bc she got used to them and it isnt all that bad we can talk more#but....like.....chill#i did sell some expensive 600€ ones a week ago but they were also needed#big frames bc big dude+lightweight and thin glasses making the most of the whole....seeing part#like the progressive shit and zones and all-look idk the words in english help#but with ~-10dpt on either side and again BIG frames to even fit on his head#yeah....pls take the best ones bc holy shit idk if we can do smth if you dont other than put a whole slab of stone on your face#well health insurance also helped in some#they do that after like 6dpt here#which in my opinion is way too high a treshhold#especially considering you need to math it out with the cylinder itself anyway and well golly#if you got +6dpt but its written with a -1cyl wELP you got +5 and thats not enough#fuck this system#make it better
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honeytonedhottie · 6 months
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general hygiene secrets + tips⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🍦
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while u upgrade in other areas of ur life, its important to upgrade ur hygiene and self care game too ✨ and this post can help u do that
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DOUBLE CLEANSING ;
not only for ur face but also for ur body, doing so makes me feel a million times cleaner. when i double cleanse my face i go in with an oil based cleanser then a water based cleanser.
my double cleansing body recommendations are the dove bar soap, african black soap or the soaps from the doctor bronners brand
for double cleansing my body i'll use an unscented/anti bacterial bar soap and after rinsing that off i'll use a liquid body gel or body wash that has the scent that i wanna smell like
MY TAKE ON UNSCENTED BODY PRODUCTS ;
i think that unscented body products r lowkey slept on but in that same breath i can kinda see why. personally, i like to use an unscented soap sometimes and then make my body smell even better by using a body butter or a lotion but thats SOMETIMES.
TAKE CARE OF UR FEET ;
use a foot file/foot scrub to ensure baby soft, barbie-esque feet. before bed time make sure to moisturize ur feet with a body butter ro vaseline and sleep with fuzzy socks on.
also keep ur toes clipped, filed, and preferably painted. personally i like to go for white toes cuz i just think its classic, but in general do NOT neglect ur feet.
ALL ABOUT FRAGRANCE ;
i love to collect different fragrances and buy a lot of perfumes bcuz i just love the variety, i love the adorable packaging i just LOVE perfume. dont be afraid to blend perfumes together and experiment with how different notes in different perfumes can work together and give u ur own unique scent.
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dont sleep on oil perfumes either, personally i find them to be very rich and SO LONG LASTING?? they're absolutely amazing. when u apply the perfume try not to rub, instead press and apply it to ur pulse points.
HOT TIP - when spraying perfume on ur body, make sure to apply some onto the insides of ur knees + ankles bcuz smell travels upwards so when u walk by, the air will smell yummy 🎀
SLUGGING SECRETS ;
slugging urself before bed ensures that when u wake up ur body will be SOFT and SMOOTH and glowy. the basic before bed slugging routine is to go in with a deeply moisturizing body lotion/butter. ur gonna wanna lather urself completely (from the neck down to ur ankles) then use a body oil.
things to look for in a body lotion or body butter - helps with properties like firming and tightening of the skin. aids in deep moisture if ur someone who has dull or dry skin.
its important to find a body butter + oil combination that works well with ur skin and doesn't break u out (plus smells good)
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snapscube · 1 month
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I FINISHED TURNABOUT BIG TOP! Which means here is my updated autopsy report ranking for cases and characters!
Both have actually shifted around quite a bit so you may find it an interesting update. I'll explain some of my current thoughts on the new placements as well as my thoughts on 2-3 in general below a break if ur curious.
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Okay so first thing let's just address the elephant in the room: We have an all new category on the character ranking!! One that I sure wish I didn't have to include but unfortunately Big Top made some... very Interesting decisions with specific characters. It would be one thing if this content was featured and then addressed, but it was particularly off-putting and frustrating to me that everything was played entirely straight?? So yeah. New lowest of the low category for a couple freaks who are actively courting a 16 year old!!!! yayyyyyy
OTHERWISE, I do have to say.... I was really pleasantly surprised at 2-3 as a case. I can say now I completely understand people having a distaste for it especially in regards to the unsavory age gaps, but literally..... almost everything else in this case was well put together and generally on-par with the quality of the rest of the series? As an overall package I actually still find Turnabout Samurai infinitely more dull. Like, maybe it's just because the lead-up to actually playing it was so uniquely frustrating for me and forcibly lowered my expectations by a ton, but there was so much good shit in Big Top. Maya, in particular, is in top form during this case. She is so fucking funny. I loved almost every word that came out of her mouth and it really solidified her top spot in the character ranking for me at present. But past that, I think the second half of this case is EXTREMELY strong compared to its opening half. I'll admit during the first trial section I was getting kinda tired with it and finding it hard to care given how much I just do not root for Max, so I had tentatively placed it at bottom of C tier. But then once von Karma arrives in the investigation section and then Acro's storyline enters the equation I really think it finds its footing. I actually found the last few scenes of the trial very emotionally effective, especially Acro's breakdown at the witness stand and mentioning how he couldn't follow through with taking his own life to escape his crime due to his desire to see his brother wake up. Like... I legitimately teared up.
And FURTHERMORE.... von Karma. Oh my god. I don't know if I'm picking up on anything here, nor do I want to know until I maybe see it for myself, but something about her conduct in the final trial really spoke to me. I feel like a surface read makes it apparent that she's just as frustrated as she is because she's losing the case to Wright again, and I do think that's a huge factor still to her reaction... but I don't know, I felt something else with her. Particularly when it came to her reaction towards Acro's attempted murder of Regina. I felt like she came across as PARTICULARLY disgusted towards that revelation and towards her own client in a way that subtly humanized her and had me just CHUCKLING AND CHORTLING in evil anticipation towards potential character arcs. I really hope I've grasped onto something here because... I love her so much. I love the idea that in spite of her reputation we're still gonna get to see this spark of humanity light up. AHHHHH.
Okay. Anyway. In summary:
I understand why people have a distaste for Big Top now, but it does not change the fact that I desperately wish I had been given the chance to experience the story myself going into it without that baggage. It genuinely did not help my experience in the slightest to just have that cloud of expectation over it and it is generally irritating that I couldn't even bring up that I was playing it without people jokingly apologizing to me or telling me that I wouldn't be able to handle it or whatever. Really not a great vibe.
As a case, it has a couple MAJOR, GLARING points of discomfort but I'm still really glad I gave it a chance and was able to find a lot of good in it anyway. It inspired me to unfortunately lower some of my other rankings because this is what I kind of consider a more middle-of-the-road quality for the series now. Solid B tier. I have played much worse.
Maya Fey is a god damn treasure.
As for some of the other character shifts, particularly in relation to some of the characters who got bumped from S to A rank, that's less because I decided I like them less now than I did when I first ranked them and more that I decided my initial interpretation of my feelings was incongruent in some cases. Like, for example I LOVE Mia I really do she's great, but in no way at this current time is she on the same level as Maya or Lana for me. So I just needed to adjust the ratios a bit.
Anyway, I'll be back eventually with posts about the next case and the last one of AA2! :3 I hear it's pretttyyy long but pretttyyy damn GOOD. Can't wait.
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mrfoox · 2 years
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Me: I think id want to know someone that's mutually obsessed with me... Like I am with them
Oliver: ok... Well then you can meet people, that's very easy!
Me: uh.... Ok
Oliver: yeah I mean your courses, the people there do have the same diagnosis like you so they might think the same way as you?
Me: mmm.... I dont think... I dont know how I think is normal even among people with my diagnose
Oliver: um, okay. Why?
Me: because of how I think of other people... Or other people I like rather
Oliver: yeah, well that's not... Unusual. I mean you want to be around people you like so you obviously think good about them?
Me: mmm, yeah but I don't think... You'd want to know how I think about others
Oliver: why? Now I want to know
Me: no, I don't think you do...
#miranda talking shit#He said id have to come up with an answer tomorrow and im like uh... Im going to freak out this man so badly....#How do i explain my mind is 10-20% concentrating on whats being said and the remaining is usually ju st...#And clusterfuck of mental hearts and me going 'theyre so cute. I love them. Their smile is adorable. I love them. Their voice is so lively.#I love them. They are so good to me im so lucky. I love them' like. Genuinely thats at least half what's in my mind when i talk with people#I like. Its similar to my... Crush mental headspace except then im also super embarrassed and self conscious. Thats how i know when i have#A crush vs i dont. But i... Am fairly sure most people dont think that actively at all times while talking to their friends.#The people i think less that way about is probably Linnéa but still i have 10% of my mind going that way as well#This mind of mine is mainly why i can believe that i am in someway a bit in love with all my friends. Because my mind just... Without me#Controlling it thinking that way. Its like an... Shitty snapchat filter over their faces with pink edges and words and sentences going up#Aboht how i cherish them and little hear emojis flying around them occasionally. Thats how i can best explain it? Its now excatly how it#Visually looks in my head but its how it feels in my mind. I usually just think like. Theyre so cute. I love them. They are so amazing.#I dont think ive actively thought this way.... Always. But since i turned 16-17 its slowly developed and now i am like... Huh... Uh... Mmm#Ive never had anyone else say they think this way of people who they arent... In love with basically but for me its about anyone i care abt#And i... Cant express it bc people would get uncomfortable. Think im in love with them... And then distance themselves etc#Ive noticed i uh.... Let my affection show too much when i speak about others i love to people. So i try to ... Tone it down... But yeah i#For me its natural and it is just how i see and how i think about the people i love but i know saying that to any of them would make them#So uncomfortable. Except maybe Maya bc shes kinda open and accepting and also very loving. And Linnéa wouldn't love it but would#Give a nod and go 'well its part of your package deal (and ive heard you say a lot worse)'#But my guy friends would be like NOOOOOOO wtf 😭#Imagine Fabian hearing this? He'd fake his own death and move to another country and start anew
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