#Chronicillness

[chronicillnesshumor]

[little-pissbaby]

fun fact about me! I have hyperadrenergic Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (hPOTS). this means I am prone to fainting when I change positions or when I feel a strong surge of emotion, positive or negative. for me, laughing is my worst non-postural trigger.

this is a clip from playing lethal company with friends a few months ago. you can hear the eerie silence of presyncope at 0:19, and the sound at 0:23 is my face hitting the keyboard lmao. I played this for my mother and she literally pissed herself laughing and DEMANDED I show every single person I know (including my doctors, who thought it was funny to see and surprisingly helpful, especially for being audio only).

[fourcroy-chosen-one]

Shout out to all the transmascs that can’t get on t because of health issues.

My doctor told me because of the medication for my chronic illness testosterone may not have any effects on me. I may not have cispassing ever. We deserve to be treated as good as cis men and we aren’t “less trans” just because we don’t medicate. We are valid. Fuck anything else.

[neuroticboyfriend]

you can trust the signals your body is sending you. whatever physical symptom you're experiencing is real. your pain, fatigue, weakness, numbness, unsteadiness, malaise, dizziness, nausea - all of it is real. i believe you. even if you, doctors, friends, or family dont. i believe you.

you should have never had the idea that you cannot be the authority on your own body put in your head. you are the only person on this planet who can convey what you are going through. no one has the right to take that from you. please believe in and advocate for yourself. and know you deserve to have someone advocating for you, too.

[myalgicencephalomyelitiscfstom]

[maniackllrr]

The frustration of having to work and do a job, which taxes all of your energy, which then makes it difficult to do tasks like cleaning or showering.

Like I have to work. I have to work to avoid homelessness. That’s not a choice. But by working I’m taxing out all of my energy, leaving me with little to no energy left over to do anything else.

[agrownupgeekgirl]

Guys!!! Progress that I actually noticed makes me giddy/silly 😁😁

[autumnalal]

like some people dont understand how someone with a chronic illness doesnt magically get better after three hours for no apparent reason or regain all abilities after a thirty minute nap, i dont understand how someone without a chronic illness doesnt magically learn how to shut up

[blitzosicedcoffee]

Ever have so many negative spoons that you feel like the void is reaching into your body and taking your spoons for tomorrow?

[everdeansystem]

Some days it’s easier to just lay in bed and forget the world exists. Letting the covers embrace you in their warm embrace. Feeling the comfort and deep warmth of the bed envelop you so that you never have to leave. Follow this feeling of safety with a dab or a joint to allow my pain to ease and subside. So I can enjoy the leisure and comfort in this place.

This is my safe space. And it’s hard for me to leave it even on my best days.

[chronicillnesshumor]

[cutsi3kitti3]

EVERYTHING FUCKING HURTS

[neuroticboyfriend]

it's not a moral failing if you're fat and it harms your health. your fatness doesn't make your disability or illness your fault. the quality of your health does not make you flawed. it doesn't define who you are.

you are a whole person, and your fatness and health concerns are morally neutral. they're natural.

[myalgicencephalomyelitiscfstom]

[nottipezzini]

Addendum.

Finished the season.

It was really nice for Penelope to finally be seen for who she is.

Just kind of disappointing that she and Colin didn't really get to be the main focus like the other couples got to be.

Didn't think watching season 3 of Bridgerton would make me so emotional. Rewatching the first few episodes before the conclusion of the season.

As much as I'm rooting for Penelope. And how smart and utterly beautiful she is.

It is hard as a plus sized, awkward woman who is deeply traumatised.

It brings up a lot of ghosts in my mind. Ones I try so hard to push down and ignore that they exist.

It will probably feel better when I see her and Colin's happy ending.

But right now, I might have to take a break and watch something else for a bit.

One would think that with all the healing and trauma therapy I've done this past decade, I would have made a dent in my selfhatered and abandonment issues. But I have barely scratched the surface of those fundamental wounds.

But inside, there is still that little girl whose insides are made of mines and barbed wire who has never, and will never experience love from anyone.

I'm the same as the actress Nicola. 37...

Rationally, it won't probably be as bad as I imagine. If I ever dared to venture out into the world again.

There will never be the perfect moment for any of it.

Anyone who can't see past my physique. My disabilities and pain aren't worth my time.

It is just so hard to be brave when all you do in life is be brave and constantly become hurt, both emotionally and physically, by everyone around you. It then is so hard, nigh impossible to get back up again.

[agrownupgeekgirl]

Morning Nerds 🤓

Back at it after a few days off 💪🏻

This part of my journey and dealing with Fibromyalgia has tested my endurance and mental fortitude to be sure, but I can feel myself growing stronger and I'm proud of my progress.