#DD: My only regret? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hoseoksluna · 4 months

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BERRIES | jjk ft. jhs

pairing: ex-boyfriend!jungkook x oc (feat. hobi)

genre: angst, tiny fluff, itty bitty smut

word count: 6.0k

summary: your ex-boyfriend shouldn't have this much influence over you when you have a new man, should he?

playlist: berries / pinterest board: berries

warnings: depression, daddy issues, use of titles, oc has dirty thoughts about hobi (do we blame her? no, we do not), slowburn, implied sex, dd/lg, soft argument

note: this took every last bit of my strength, so i had to split it up. i'm sorry if this is a piece of absolute shit, but as you all know work this week squeezed everything out of me and i'm so exhausted that i'm not even sure if this is worth posting. i struggled a lot with this fic, rewrote it multiple times, and i'm so very happy that it's finished. i hope you all enjoy the start of a new series, this time a slowburn that will have more parts, more depth and everything. and surprise! it features hobi, my beautiful husband. it was my first time writing about him and he's missing so terribly from my soul that it was one of the reasons why i struggled so much. i wish it weren't like this for my first time with him, but oh well. i hope you, guys, enjoy. please, let me know what you think. <3

The satiny material of your cream-colored dress must be the one and the same that these sculptures had worn centuries ago. You can almost imagine the softness kissing your fingerprint instead of the cool stone as you graze your touch against each and every immortalized angel of loveliness. You’re stirred by a sense of poignancy—that you’re alive and they’re not and yet you believe that as you stare at them, feel what they’ve been through the more you study their eternal expressions, they stare right back with their eternally tender eyes, see right through you, through your heart, know its contents. You wish you were in their place instead; you’re sure they would’ve handled your cursed life better than you can.

Or you wish you were as stony as them.

But you’re an opulent fountain of emotions that are anything but gentle.

This thought distracts your attention from the way your feet ache in the boots you chose to wear to impress your date. Thigh high, with black knee socks underneath to keep you warm from the cruel breath of autumn. Hoseok is carrying your trenchcoat as you’re adventuring on your own in this art museum and that’s the only sliver of kindness he’s shown you this very morning.

The only compliment you’ve received from him was a nonverbal one. An up and down look with a smirk creeping in when he picked you up at your apartment. No hug, no caress. You felt so small—and awkward a little bit, comparison rushing in. Not in the form of a wave of the sea, but in the form of a snake, its thick body tightening around your throat. An ouroboros, which made you regret going out on a date so soon.

It hasn’t even been a month since you’ve become a single girl again, learning how to walk in this new, harsh reality, your legs wobbly, weak and too, too heavy. And the lack of comfortable physical contact made you see your ex-boyfriend before your own eyes, the memory of how he acted at the beginning of your first date. The way he picked you up into his arms due to his excitement of being with you and carried you inside his car. He put on your seatbelt for you. Drove carefully. Held your hand as he led you to the restaurant he picked for you. Even during the walk after while you talked about the stars and you couldn’t help but tell him that his eyes were filled with them.

Hoseok did neither of those things. He had asked you where you wanted to go and you’ve wanted to visit the museum for quite a while, so you suggested it. He had agreed, no sort of enthusiasm evident in his voice muffled by the phone call. And you’ve barely exchanged a few words during the half an hour of your time spent here, let alone led an entire conversation. You should’ve heeded the warning when it was right in front of you.

Hoseok is certainly not of the artistic kind.

Looks quite bored as you turn your head to look at him, your coat dangling from his arm so terribly devastatingly. And when you focus your gaze to your right, where a dark wine-tinged room, with golden frames of paintings, awaits you and where you’ve longed to go the moment you stepped a foot inside this grand building, a distaste pools on your tongue, your former aesthetic elation ruined.

You’re surprised he didn’t stand you up.

You don’t even want to take pictures. As a matter of fact, you want to go home. But you can’t. Can’t ravage your only possibility and means of forgetting the person you still love. Can’t really encourage Hoseok to leave your life, not when you’re the type of person that doesn’t find love upon every corner you turn to.

This is your only chance. And he’s the only man you’ll conceivably have in your life for quite some time.

You walk up to him and take your coat from his arm. His eyes deepen on you, in fact they haven’t strayed from you during the entire half an hour—and that bothers you. If your ex-boyfriend were here, he’d share the beauty with you. Make you laugh so hard that the sound would echo around the vast room. Perhaps give life to the sculptures and they would laugh along, too.

Your heart hangs heavy in your chest, sinks ever so slowly and you can’t bear it. You need to leave. Take this date elsewhere, hope for betterment to grace you—to have but a fragment of pity for you.

“You hungry?” you ask, softly, willing your voice to be smooth and not divulge the brassy storm of your emotions to him. Hoseok doesn’t know anything about you. Doesn’t know that you yearn for another person to be standing in his place. “Did you have breakfast?”

Hoseok needed the date to be in the early hours. Said he had a meeting in the afternoon. Would be working on a project with his colleagues until the late hours. You didn’t mind, not really, in fact it animated you—brought briskness into the sadness of your headspace, knowing it was rainy and cloudy outside. Perfect weather for the influence of the arts. That is, until you realized that it was a grave mistake to take a businessman to a museum; that you dragged a heathen to a church.

Hoseok shifts his weight on each foot, his shoulders swaying with the movement, and he licks his lip, bringing your attention to them. Small, but full—you wonder what they would feel like against yours. Wonder if he’d be gentle with you or violent. If he’d stroke your hair or grip it; fondle the ribbon you’re wearing in a half up do or untie it, entirely. Use it for another means like your ex-boyfriend invariably did.

Your distaste grows, but not for Hoseok. It grows like poison ivy for yourself and your tendency to compare him with someone he doesn’t deserve to be juxtaposed with.

Guilt blossoms in your sternum, the leaves of that poison ivy. Pretty to the eye, but deadly for the body. Just like you. You’re too baneful for such a pretty man like Hoseok. You’d do well to respect his boundaries and abstain from physical contact, prevent red rashes from marring his skin.

“I haven’t eaten yet,” Hoseok says, just as softly, rubbing the nape of his neck, the black cloth of his dress shirt taut over his arms—a pretty sight, one that could be hanging in the wine-tinged room for generations to gawk upon. “Truth be told, I was too nervous.”

A brief smile adorns his slender face and you melt, the poison ivy scratching you raw. Your heart picks up its rhythm, flattery clothing it in a protective layer and you pout, your hand itching to graze his forearm. But a hidden fight rises in you, an army of darkness ready with their bows, their arrows shooting thoughts into your brain about how little you’re worthy of such kindness and favor.

Though when Hoseok blushes upon seeing your tender expression, it gives you some sort of strength to stand tall against those demons. Despite the fact you don’t understand it, you don’t question it either and you cling to it, sensing its freedom speaking to you in a foreign language. A yearning forms in you, one you haven’t yet had the possibility of meeting. A yearning to learn its syntax and vocabulary. And when you give in to it, the poison ivy in you lessens.

This is good.

You reciprocate his smile and you coo. Find it the easiest thing in the world. And because you’re so grateful for what he’s unwittingly done for you, you decide to share your truth with him as well.

“Let’s go eat, then.” Your eyes crinkle and you’d bet light flickers in them, for your whole body does, you sense it. A warm light enlarges on its axis, taking a hold of the heaviness you felt. “There’s no need to be nervous. It’s what I told myself when I was getting ready. My stomach hurt and believe it or not when I told myself these words, it stopped.”

Hoseok chuckles, his arm slapping back to his side, but you notice that it trembles. You’re so touched by it that you become angry at yourself, self-hatred clashing with that warmth. You misinterpreted him so unfairly and what’s more, you wallowed in your brokenness and your heartbreak, when Hoseok had been nervous and timid the whole time, which now sheds light on his lack of closeness with you.

You’re despicable. And the awareness of it transforms into that snake tightening around your throat again. Only this time, you welcome it. Long for it to take your life. It’s the least you deserve.

But you’re not letting yourself loll in the bed of your horrendous emotions. No, you lift your hand and you caress his arm, the one that quakes. And amidst the sepulchral attention of the sculptures, you’re a witness to that trembling’s halt, to Hoseok’s visible tranquility, and you want to weep.

You know if you were to gaze at the eternal angels of beauty, you’d see stony tears appear on their ivory cheeks, too.

“I’m sorry,” Hoseok mumbles and you curl your brows in confusion, not knowing what he’s apologizing for. Hoseok opens his mouth again to speak, but he pauses, sloshing the words in his mouth. You feel so bad that a craving to better yourself overcomes your entire being. “I’m sorry for being such a buzzkill. If you wanna explore this place more, we can. I saw you looking at the room with the paintings.”

He tilts his head in the direction of the aforementioned room, but you care very little about it as of now. You’d much rather take this elsewhere and get to know him better, so you don’t make the mistake of distorting him again. You’re not very keen on forcing a heathen to pray, either, however you do appreciate his willingness and attentiveness. Carry those things into your jarred heart, fold them inside its chambers, the edge pieces to the puzzle of his personality.

“Don’t worry,” you murmur, taking it one step further and hooking your arm around his. Hoseok sighs, his shyness slowly breaking apart as he clasps his hand over yours and if you could dissolve any more, now would be the perfect time for it. His hold is strong and steady—and it creates something stable within you, an orchard of fruit trees, pink and green, and bushes of berries, a safe place you want to rest in; lay down your brokenness and woes in. “You’re good. No need to apologize.”

His blush deepens at the reassurance and he smiles, softly, running his thumb over your knuckles. And the gratefulness you feel due to the fact he’s touching you, it is the rain that freshens up the apples and cherries hanging on the twigs of those trees, guiding it into full bloom. You focus on it—focus on the thick, cottony material of his dress shirt as you rub his forearm in response. You want to acknowledge yourself with the unspoken parts of him like these, remember them, allow them to heal you and crack the plaster over your heart.

And there you hear it. The crumble as Hoseok leans in and presses a chaste peck onto your cheek, lingering there for a second more, inhaling your sandalwood scent. And his smile widens as he looks down on you at such close proximity, erasing your touch-starvation once and for all. It’s your turn to blush now and you feel an inkling to shy away from his gaze, but you stifle it back. Curl your mouth in a smile—your heart thumping louder amidst the orchard now that it has more space to function in.

“No, I really want to apologize. It’s been too long since I’ve been on a date and you’re so stunning that I’ve forgotten my game, so I can’t help but to be nervous. I don’t know how to act around you,” he says, mutedly, punctuating his sentence with a breathy laugh, glimmering eyes flicking to the lining of your silky neckline just below your collarbones, tracing the miniature cherub hung up on your dainty necklace plated in gold, motionless against your dress. Your own heart grows wings and momentum in its place, fluttering in haste to move closer to him. He bores his gaze back into yours, letting it stay there. “Art isn’t really my thing, but you look like you belong here. Look like all those angels around.” He nods at your necklace. “And like that angel, too. Can I take a picture of you?”

You’re so taken aback that you don’t have time to respond. Pulling out his phone from the pocket of his dress pants, he withdraws from you and gently ushers you in the direction of the closest angel, your trenchcoat slung over his arm again, vibrating with life. He positions you how he likes—right in front of the immense sculpture, your head turned slightly to the side so the wisps of your white ribbon in your hair can be seen. His touch grounds you, tells your bloodstream, your organs that everything is okay, repeats it a little louder to your headspace—all before war could be declared with you.

Hoseok, the prince of peace.

The prince that crouches to the dirty floor so the vastness of the angel’s wings can fit in the shot. Yours, too. You think you’ve grown a pair of your own, alongside your heart, now that your shared honesty brought you closer.

You struggle to hold back your sob, to stop the corners of your mouth from rounding, your chin from quivering—all because the lightness that you sense wrapping over your heart is one you haven’t felt in a really long time. You feel taken care of, feel like you can depend on him, and while you can’t explain why you feel that way, you consider that such an immense blessing, regardless. So much that your eyes wet for the camera, but you don’t mind. Let that be captured in the memory—the mending that occurred. And let that be safe with him.

You smile and the flash goes off, which causes you to burst into giggles, your liquid softness forgotten, and run to him, your palm covering his phone camera so nobody sees his defiance. You look around to make sure no employee is in sight before you face him, cheeks warm, heart warm, wings warm, body warm. Hoseok quirks a brow, confused, gaping up at you from his position, and you take a deep breath to halt another inrush of laughter.

“You can’t take pictures with flash here. They’ll throw us out,” you whisper-shout, your giggles escaping your tightened mouth. His own forms into an ‘O’, fingers clicking on his screen, presumably turning off the automatic flash.

“I didn’t know,” he whisper-shouts back, mouth stretched in a lopsided grin. “I haven’t been here since I was a kid.” You shake your head, shoulders still shaking with the last of your giggles. He probably didn’t have a phone back then, which makes it even funnier. He inspects his settings again to make sure it’s all good before his hand finds your thigh and pushes you back. “Okay, I turned it off. Go back to the angel.”

It’s your whole body that flutters now, not just your heart, both pairs of wings unfurling, and when you retrace your steps, you still feel the heat of his touch—half on the fabric of your dress, half on your bare skin. And as you smile more naturally for the picture this time, greed kisses your core. A greed for more of his touch; on the same place as well as elsewhere.

A twinkle of where he could possibly touch you flashes before your eyes and it’s all your focal point consists of when you turn your head to your former position the way he wanted it and he praises you for it: “Good, good.”

Your muscles clench as you imagine his hand going underneath the fabric, exploring what’s hidden in there for him. The words of praise he would utter at the discovery of your private flesh. Your ears must be red. Such a twist of events you didn’t expect. A meek form of demureness creeps in, enveloping you in a feminine sensuality and you’ve missed feeling this way. Missed feeling pretty and alluring for yourself first, then for a man second. Missed being the center of your attention like this, of someone else’s as well.

You’ve always loved it. Perhaps due to the fact that you very seldom have it—so when it does come, it changes your life and you attach your being to it.

You didn’t anticipate going home with Hoseok, especially not on the first date. But because you’re being fed, you don’t really care about being proper. You want to go home with him and so you simply shall.

Can’t let the opportunity run away from you.

And so you arch your back a little bit more, look up at the angel and give her your silent thanks, your hair flowing around your form when you flick your gaze back to Hoseok to see him concentrated on the task, his smooth features gravely serious. Your stomach flips.

“Now from the back,” he instructs without lifting his eyes off of the screen of his phone. “Just like you were.”

A breath lodges in your throat, the double meaning burning the poison ivy down to ashes and you swallow it, let your stomach acid consume it until there’s nothing left of it, until all that your body carries is nothing but the lightness and the seductiveness that Hoseok gracefully gave you, the comfortable heft of the wings that grew because of him.

It’s those things that drive forth your following words with the world’s ease, unabashedly.

“You want it from the back?”

Hoseok’s mouth parts and the look he exchanges with you should chill your blood, but it doesn’t. If anything, it boils it. The heat that wafts off it pools in your core before ascending to your imaginary wings, leaving them dripping with sweat and the dew of titillation. Hoseok’s eyes narrow, shadowed by the furrow of his brows, encouraging it all the more.

There is it—the heady energy shift, permeated with the sweetest of berry juices, stemming from lust, from the orchard he planted in you. Strengthening your allure, steeling you from head to toe. You submit to it; kneel into it, notionally. Your elation raises from the dead—and you grin.

“Behave.”

A pulse in your private parts. The lengthening of your expression of delight. Your wings, your muscles clench and the same winged creatures soar to your heart from your stomach, squeezing the beating flesh. You swivel on your heels, the hem of your dress rippling, exposing more of your tender skin, the ribbon in your hair following suit.

Hoseok sucks in a breath. Your cheeks ache from the joy’s strain and it is utterly exhilarating to you.

“Yes, sir.”

Hoseok coos his approval and you can’t take it anymore. You let him take a few more pictures as you move around, dancing in your own way, running your fingers through your hair, trying to distract yourself from the throbbing between your legs, but to no avail. And when you sigh and face him head-on, Hoseok is already on his feet, walking towards you with a reappearing lopsided grin that forces the butterflies gnawing at your heart to go absolutely rampant.

You’re done for. You need to take him home. You’re not even curious about how the pictures came out—you can always look at them later.

Hoseok seems to know about your neediness because when he crosses the distance, he cups your chin. Makes you look up at him. And his smirk deepens while your heart increases in size, wings flitting at the special attention.

“Such a pretty girl,” he murmurs, caressing your skin with his thumb. Your eyes round and the heat you feel is sweltering underneath your clothes. All the more reason for him to take them off. “The pictures are great. Wanna see?”

Biting your lip, you shake your head, briefly. “What I want is to make you breakfast,” you say, mirroring his tone, hoping he gets the hint.

Hoseok waggles your chin, humming. “Oh, yeah?”

Fuck. If his scolding already didn’t make you submissive, then his response and his actions have. You wet your mouth, teeth instinctively sinking back in, and only nod. Hoseok opens your coat and covers your shoulders in its warmth, pressing the cotton twill fabric against your sternum.

“Thank you, sir.”

A fond sound pours out of him and the fact that he likes to be called by that title heightens the pulse between your legs. “Let’s go.”

He leads you towards the exit with a hand on the small of your back and you’re so happy to be touched at last that with a final look at the angels, you send out your silent love and goodbye to them, thank them one last time for the kindness you received because of them, one that you so ferociously sought after and longed for.

They seem to bow to you, happy to be of service, and you smile so profoundly that you feel as though nothing could stain your joy and mar it all over again. They wouldn’t allow that to happen—and a tendril of hope burst open within you like sunlight tearing through clouds, one that is suffused with the notion that Hoseok would stand in the way, side by side with those sculptures, too.

And he does when you swivel your head back and catch a glance of someone you know.

A piercing on the side of his brow, unchanged from the last time you saw him. Round eyes, murky. Ashen complexion that used to bloom with vibrant tints. Full, soft-toned mouth, ever so stuck in that pout, one you used to kiss until it bruised.

Your bloodstream doesn’t cease its flow. Not until you notice the person beside him.

A girl with an aura so cataclysmic that it forces you to stop dead in your tracks. An August night storm personified, obnoxiously sweet-smelling of the past summer that you spent with her companion. The hollow, funereal scent of a meadow doused in petrichor—she walks with it, her hands intertwined before her in a clasp.

You wished for him to be in Hoseok’s place so ardently that he appeared. And now that you contemplate him, the lack of distance between him and the girl, it makes you regret that you ever did.

Because, unknowingly, it drenched you in gasoline and his presence is a lighter, hers the hand that has flicked it to life and now serenely holds it against your skin, waiting until the flames, little by little, devour you whole.

And the job is finished when both of their heads whirl, meeting your livid stare.

And Jungkook, too, stops dead in his tracks.

“Do you know him?” Hoseok asks and you find it strange that you can hear him when all you can see is red.

And the red fades into the matching black shirt that Jungkook is wearing, into his bluntly pained mien; into the strands of his date’s short hair and her scrunched up brows as she regards you with a strong aversion that makes you scoff. And the same red weakens when Hoseok turns your attention to him by playing with the ends of your ribbon, grazing them before twirling them around his finger.

A breath of fresh air, he is.

You don’t know what to say. Don’t know whether to tell him the truth or come up with something that won’t devastate what you have currently going on with him. But if you lie to him, you’ll stumble into a dead end you’d much rather stay clear of. You’d see it before your eyes once you do take him home and it would ruin the newness he brought up with you, preventing it from taking root in you.

Devastation awaits you in either case. Both you and Hoseok.

Cursed, your life is. Doomed, absolutely fucking doomed.

What would the angels do in your place?

Seeking their wisdom behind you, it is not in them that you find your answer, but in the passing pair dressed in black, making their way over to the dark-wined room. He’s pretending he didn’t see you at all, walking away from you without saying a word, despite the fact you broke up on good terms.

You worshiped him in this very building almost on your knees and he dismissed you as if you meant nothing to him, caring for the feelings of his date, instead.

Peculiarly, the sentiments Hoseok installed in you, both of the passionate and the soft kind, turn that fire blue and it becomes the driving force that guides you to act without a single thought spared.

“Yeah, I do know him. Do you mind if I quickly say hi to him?”

The corner of Hoseok’s mouth curls and he caresses your hair down your back one last time. “Go, I’ll get the car ready.”

Such a confident, strong man, broken out of the confines of his former timidness. Not possessive, nor insecure—letting you do what you want. Respectful of your personal life that doesn’t include him just yet. And for that very reason it will—as soon as you’re done putting out that fire in you.

It’s not only you that has gone through a change upon this hour and it strikes your awe, enough for you to lean in and peck his cheek, just like he did to you.

Hoseok makes a sound of endearment, pivots on his feet to leave you to it, but you grab a hold of his hand. Have a need to say something to him.

His brows rise at the attention and you brush your hand across his knuckles, mimicking his previous actions, having learned them, intimately.

“Thank you, Hoseok. Really,” you say with a smile that could magnetically pull the sunlight out of its hiding place behind the clouds and bathe this bizarre room in light. You squeeze his hand.

A swirl of shyness flushes his face in rose pink and he shakes his head. “No need to thank me,” he assures, reciprocating the smile. “And call me Hobi. You can save Hoseok for later.”

Your jaw falls open and Hoseok chuckles, warmly, deepening the pulse between your legs until a wet spot adorns your panties beneath your dress, one that you look forward to showing him at the aforementioned time.

He pivots again and you watch his tall, lean figure leave. Back muscles clothed in black, straining against the fabric. He must’ve undergone his military service.

A beautiful man. You can’t wait to taste him. Taste that manliness.

Loosening a breath, you turn around to search for your ex-boyfriend. And much to your dismay, he’s appreciating the angel sculpture—the very one and only Hoseok took your pictures with. Fire licks at your every nerve ending, but then you notice that his date is nowhere in sight.

A perfect opportunity to do what you want to do.

Pulling out your phone out of your little purse, you look for his name in the history of your calls and tap on it, placing the device against your ear, your hoop earrings clashing against the screen. You watch him palm his pocket as the vibration disturbs his aesthetic pleasure and he casts a long glance at your name filling up his screen. Doesn’t comb his gaze through his surroundings. No, he seems to be transfixed by the twist of events and when he swipes his finger to accept the call, his stare begins to dig a hole into the dirty, marble floor.

Doesn’t say anything.

You scoff, fury grazing your fire. “You’re pretending not to know me? That’s low.” His pout rounds and the tip of his shoe traces the edges of the ruination he’s caused. Remains silent. “Who’s your little girlfriend? I thought you’d introduce me. Where is she, anyways?”

It’s him who scoffs now and he flicks his gaze towards the face of the angel. It’s like he’s staring right at you. “You shouldn’t be doing this, little one.”

The too familiar pet name brings agony to your heart and you would break had Hoseok not given you his strength, if the dependability of him waiting for you outside wasn’t real. And the allure and the lightness in you, perhaps the very love of the sculptures encompassing you—all of those things only vivify your solidity. You have no reason to break, you’re safe.

“Well, I think you should be a good Daddy and meet me right there in the red room,” you seethe, glad for the anger to be lingering in you, for the utterance of the title leaving you unscathed. You’re just giving him a taste of his own poison, nothing else.

Jungkook runs a hand through his hair and sighs, clenching his jaw. “Don’t call me that.”

You chuckle, enlivened by the provocation. “I can do whatever I want. Besides, you started it.”

He grits his teeth. “Not when you’re talking to me, you can’t.”

Your fire rises in overwhelming waves, your curt response ready on your tongue, but Jungkook hangs up, making you shut your mouth, instantly.

You hate him for that; hate him with the entirety of your being.

What has happened to your friendship? To the sweet, weeping Jungkook who broke up with you because he didn’t want to cause you any more pain with the state of his mental health, who has been dealing with depression for so long that he’s reached a point of no return, a lightless room with no windows, where all he saw was you, and he didn’t want you to be a victim of such unhealthy attachment. So he bid you goodbye, hugged you until you couldn’t breathe and let you go.

Three weeks ago.

You haven’t seen him or heard from him since until now. Until you’ve found someone else and moved on with your life. That’s just your luck.

And now the person you’re gazing at, it’s not the same one that wept against your chest. Yes, he might have been strict with you during intimate times, teased you with his fatherliness during the day even—but that invariably was imbued with the mellowness of love.

Try as you may while his words ring in your headspace, you cannot unearth any trace of that same mellowness in it. Only bitterness, coldness and a profound darkness.

Jungkook pockets his phone and, leaving both of his hands there, sunk deeply, he walks over to the wine-tinged room, his frown obscuring the place in gloom. Murky clouds, personified. A perfect match to the storm of his companion. Bile lodges inside your throat.

You follow after him, your feet aching terribly in your boots, but it serves as some kind of alleviation to the tautness of your emotions, of your confusion, disgust and offence. Makes you feel better—because once you see Jungkook ogling a certain painting of a woman beaming at him softly, dressed in flowers, blues and greens as the redness akin to your fire burns in her background, the agony tries to slither its way inside your heart, but fails.

You’re a locked orchard.

Jungkook senses your presence and he swivels, biting the inside of his cheek, pierced brow quirking. There’s a strain to his shoulders and his Adam’s apple bobbles as he takes in your appearance. The creaminess of your short, silky dress, the darker shade of the same color of your trenchcoat slung loosely over your shoulders, exposing your brown, leather, high-heeled boots, your matching purse clutched in both of your hands as you strut towards him. Calm, all of a sudden. It does nothing to you, nothing whatsoever—your heart momentarily attached to Hoseok.

“I thought you’d already left,” he murmurs, tipping up his chin. Begins to sway back and forth on the balls of his feet, the carmine hues of the room swathing him in a deeper shade of darkness. “Isn’t your boyfriend waiting for you?”

You don’t bother to correct him. It’s none of his business who Hobi is to you, not when he treated you like a stranger.

“We were about to leave, but then I saw your actions,” you say, quite monotonously, your calmness as disturbing as it is triumphant. You yourself even wonder at it. “What the fuck was that?”

A smirk. “Glad to know I still have some kind of effect on you.”

You scrunch up your brows, distaste once again pooling in your mouth. “Trust me, I would’ve done this with anyone I know. You’re not special.”

His smirk widens. “So, you’re not jealous?” He rubs the side of his jaw, staring at you, intently, and disgust comes over you like a splash of a wave, soaking you in cold sweat.

He did it for that very reason—to make you jealous. Walked right past you, just to get a rise out of you. As much as you loved him half an hour ago, that affection turns into dust within you, sprinkling the fruit trees and the berry brushes with its gray smithereens, poisoning them.

Ouroboros, all over again. Full circle. Anger covers your disgust.

A voice echoes within the room. Airy and light, as feminine as it is otherworldly, and you know, without a doubt, who it belongs to. It doesn’t suit her, not in the slightest.

“There you are,” your ex-boyfriend’s companion trails off, the clapping of her flat shoes halting. “Who are you?”

You only turn your head to the side, signaling to her that you’ve heard her question, because you fix your stare back at Jungkook as you answer it. “It’s not something you should trouble yourself with. Can you give us a minute?”

You don’t hear any movement, so she must be stubbornly staying where she is. All right, she can join the conversation for all you care.

When you turn your head back around, you catch stars oozing from Jungkook’s eyes, a conveyance of adornment painting his face in gentle colors that could never be associated with this room. There it is, the face you know, so resplendent of the one you last saw. And it grazes your anger, whispers to it that it was a mistake, a game of pretense, because you’re reverently acknowledged with his soul—you know who he is. While it may explain his fucked-up behavior, you don’t soften. Not at the hint of familiarity. Not even at the hushed hint of your deduction telling you that the reason why he unmasked himself was because you chose him and didn’t run away when his companion spoiled your short time together.

You don’t soften because you simply don’t want to.

You don’t want to give in to any means of getting close to him.

The chapter is finished. You shouldn’t have called him. You should’ve left with Hobi.

You don’t wish to keep him waiting long, nor do you wish to keep sprawling in your mistake. You pivot, ready to leave, but Jungkook captures your hand. Desirousness palpitates in his eyes as if he, too, needed to tell you something of urgency.

You’ll hear him out, but that’s the end of it.

“Can I see you later?” he asks, pupils growing in size until they absorb his chocolate irises, his grip over your hand tight and heated. A wind blows in your orchard, sweeping away all the darkened smithereens left by the bane, freshening you up.

You don’t really think that’s a good idea.

“I won’t have time for you later, I’ll be with Hoseok.”

To Hobi, you won’t lie, but the same can’t be applied to Jungkook.

His breath hitches in his throat, disappointment weighing him down, the thought of you being intimate with someone who is not him causing his posture to slouch even more.

But he surprises you with the words he says next.

“I’ll wait, then. Let me know when you’re alone.”

And you surprise yourself even more when you nod, turning on your heel and scurrying off to meet Hobi outside.

𓂃 ౨ৎ LOVE-KISSED BABIES: @tkslovechild, @jjk7k, @parkinglot-nights, @bethvar, @Sexytholland, @yoongibaybee, @crystaleah.

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sednas · 1 year

Text

─ TAKE YOU LIKE A DRUG I TASTE YOU ON MY TONGUE.

FT. toji fushiguro x fem!reader featuring my daddy issues

TW. dd/lg, half mean half gentle!toji, sub!reader, daddy issues, thigh riding, oral (m receiving), slight dumbification, praise and degradation, public s!x (at first), creampie, p!ssy slapping (once), 2k+ words

♡♡♡. sorry for the potential typos/ugly sentences, it's been a long day but i really wanted to post this

you met toji during the first semester of college, when your parents moved out to get closer to the place where you were studying.

it all started out innocent. quick glances, lingering hands on the skin, a few smirks and playful winks, smalltalk about college and work...

he was tall, dark hair, deep green eyes, a scar on the corner of his lips, big hands, broad shoulders, strong thighs...

every time you'd come back home for the weekends you expected him to finally have settled down with one of the numerous women in the neighborhood, all salivating over him.

but he stayed single, and you could fantasize about him without the annoying thought of his pretty wife sucking him off. as years went by, your crush on him got pretty obvious, you became more confident, trying to give him the hint that he could do whatever he wanted with you. but toji was blind to your signs, or at least that's what he was pretending to be.

his ignorance toward you left a bittersweet taste on your tongue, putting you as nothing more than the plain daughter of his neighbor, and you felt like fifteen again, ignored by the boy you liked.

which brings us to tonight, a few days after your graduation. you came back to your parent's place and you can't seem to sleep, sitting on the grass, you look up at the stars and think of all the things that are awaiting for you now that you're done with college. it's scary and exciting at the same time. you'll be leaving the city for your dream job soon, and there's only one regret that comes to your mind.

“beautiful night uh?” you hear a deep voice coming from the darkness of the night. speaking of the devil... it's toji, he just sat down on a chair a few meters away from you in the neighborhood's common garden, he has a drink in his hand, you can't tell what's in it but it's probably alcohol.

“I've heard that you graduated. I always knew you were a smart girl, your parents must be proud of you.” he says, his green eyes lazily resting on you.

you shrugged your shoulders, still sitting on the grass.

“my dad barely said that he was proud of me...” you laugh bitterly. why are you even talking about this? he doesn't care, he just wants to make a quick small talk.

a few seconds of silence go by... you see toji moving, patting the seat next to him. it's... unexpected, but you can't let go of such an occasion to be closer to him, and without a word you go sit down. he extends his legs with a sigh. your eyes linger on him in a not so subtle manner. he's wearing a black tank top with gray baggy sweatpants.

“your dad's just not great with words, I'm sure he's very proud of you.”

you don't say anything, not trusting your voice right now, feeling like a lost little girl even though you're past twenties. he must surely pity you by now, and you hate it.

“do you need to hear it?”

“what do you mean?” you ask, arching an eyebrow, and you see him shift on his seat until he's facing you, your knees touching.

“alright... gimme your hands.” he says, and even though it's an order his voice is soft and reassuring. you obey, putting your hands in his. the skin of his hands is calloused, you can tell he's been working with them all of his life.

you can feel your heart beating faster and harder inside your chest, unsure of what you're going to do once he will speak. you're so close to him, of course you already had conversations with him, but this one feels too intimate, both of you alone in the darkness of the night... anything could happen.

“I'm very proud of you. you told me before that you were anxious about the future but I'm sure it will all turn out to be okay. you've got that light in your eyes, I'm not quite sure how to describe it but it's bright and I know you'll make a good use of it.” he finally says and for a few seconds you both drown in a silence where you can only hear the sound of crickets.

within a second, your lips crash into his as he lets out a surprised moan which comes out muffled, feeling your soft hands running down on his forearms, sending shivers down his spine.

“what the fuck are you doing?” he finally asks, pulling away from you. your heart stops for a second, hearing him raise his voice at you, but he unexpectedly pulls you in for another kiss, his hand snaking up behind your neck and this time you're the one moaning against his mouth.

“been wanting you for so damn long.” he mumbles as he deepens the kiss, his tongue slipping between your lips and making you feel empty brained. you clutch on his chest, heart fluttering to his words.

“re-really? I thought you didn't like me...” you can't believe what you're hearing, your body trembles slightly as toji kisses your neck and nods his head.

“how could I not like such a sweet girl like you.” he purred in a low, baritone voice, his hands slowly sliding down your waist to guide you on his lap, letting you feel how hard he is against you.

you let out a gasp when you feel him start to rock your hips on his thigh, his green eyes piercing through yours. “you think I didn't notice the way you were looking at me for all those years. how your outfits got sluttier just to have a crumble of my attention uh? just imagine how many times I've fucked myself imagining you taking my cock like the good girl I know you fucking are.”

you moan, feeling pure bliss at this revelation as his big hands keep forcing you to hump his thigh. you can feel your pussy getting dragged all the way up and down his clothed hard cock, giving you a hint of how big it is. both of you moan when your pussy lips engulf his tip through your shorts and soon enough a wet spot starts to form on his sweatpants.

“fucking hell Y/N, look at you... I don't know how I resisted fucking you for so long when your body is that perfect to play with. fuck!- but I'm done holding back, I'm gonna fucking ruin you.” he grunts, his voice still low and dominant, his fingers digging into your plump skin.

the fact that you're in the neighborhood's common garden is already long forgotten, you don't care about the whole city seeing you in this position, you've wanted this for too long. your pussy is throbbing, the soft material of his pants rubbing deliciously against your hardened clitoris, your tongue almost comes out of your mouth while toji watches your dumb expression with delight.

“gonna cum... I'm... I'm...” your whiney voice echoes through the silent night and toji bounces and flexes his thigh on purpose, taking you over the edge as he whispers praises against your ear. you come in a muffled cry, biting toji's shoulder to silence your cute moans.

toji gives you a few minutes to rest, caressing your hair and giving your thighs reassuring strokes every time he feels your body twitch on top of him. in a gentle gesture, he takes your chin in his hand to look at your face.

“let's go to my room yeah? I want to give you more.” you can only nod your head as you both leave the garden and head over to his house. the whole place is plunged in darkness and you follow him closely not to trip over anything, your arm wrapped around his own in a clingy way while he guides you to his bed.

he gets on top of you, removing your shorts and your top in a fast motion, so smoothly that you barely notice that you're now half naked under him. you suddenly feel shy under his warm gaze which devours your body and you turn your head to avoid his eyes.

“don't turn all shy now sweetheart, your body is a work of art.” he murmurs, his hot breath tickling your skin before kissing your neck. his hands travel up to your chest, playing with your tits and gently pinching your nipples.

“ahh~ please, daddy...” you whine without thinking, and toji suddenly stops what he's doing, lifting his head to look into your eyes. his pupils are dilated, his gaze darkened by lust and need. you can feel him squeeze your skin a little bit harder than before, and you whine again.

“is it true? am I your daddy?” he teases, bringing his hand close to your inner thighs, caressing them with the tip of his digits. his cock never ached to be inside someone like this, he can feel it twitch and throb inside his pants, begging to know how your little pussy feels like.

“yes, yes you are, please daddy, I need you... want you to feel good too...” you beg, your hands clutching on his chest once again, trying to remove his clothes but it's no easy task in your position and with how your body is trembling.

toji wears a boyish smirk at your words, thinking about how cute you look and sound right now. he brings his face close to yours, his lips only a few inches away from your open mouth. “yeah? do you want to make daddy feel good?” and he smiles when you nod eagerly. he stands up, gently dragging you toward the edge of the bed, letting your head suspended in the air.

“alright, you know what's coming next, don't you baby?” as an answer, you open your mouth, presenting your tongue and waiting for him. he huffs with amusement at your hunger, finally freeing his cock and sighing of relief. he taps the tip against your tongue, smearing your saliva all over it. before you can whine with impatience he pushes it right in, sliding his entire length down your throat in one smooth motion of his hips.

“god... I wonder if your pussy is as tight as your throat...” toji groans, biting his bottom lip to prevent any slutty moans to come out of him. your greedy tongue swirls around his leaking tip, and you moan whenever you feel a vein drags along the curves of your lips.

you feel light headed, with your head hanging in the air, half naked in the bed of the man you like, his balls slapping against your face. he lets out a moan, watching your tits bounce and the buldge that his cock is forming inside your throat, his eyes roll back, one more minute and he's going to cum down your throat.

he makes you choke on his cock one last time before pulling out, the action earning a disappointed whimper from you. “don't whine you baby.” he warns with a smug look on his face, manhandling once more to put you on your back.

“but I...” he hushed you by slapping your clothed cunt and tears immediately start to form in the corner of your eyes and he almost regrets what he just did, seeing your teary expression.

“it's okay baby. just be a good girl and let me do what I want with you, you're gonna like it I promise.” you nod as he massages your pussy, and once you say “yes daddy” he's a goner, tearing your panties apart, he presses his cock against your puffy clit, making you jolt under him.

he lifts your hips and enters you in one second, your wetness immediately coating his cock, making it easier for him to sink deep inside you. “good... good... how do you feel so fucking good...” toji rambles in his low voice, and it makes you spread your legs wider. you don't know when he removed his clothes but he's as naked as you now, you almost whimper at the sight, wrapping your legs around his slutty waist.

“does that feel good baby?... fuck, you look so dumb right now.” he chuckles darkly, his big hand gently slapping your cheek before holding your whole face in it. you try to get your half lidded eyes to focus on his face, with his dark hair adorning his facial features and his eyes shining with lust as his cock keeps reaching deep for that spongy spot inside you. it's too much for you to handle.

you start babbling incoherent words, all interrupted by whines as your head falls on the pillows. his bedsheets smell like him, it almost makes you feel tipsy, drunk on his strong, masculine scent. you want to stay here forever, drowned in him. “daddy, daddy...” you keep repeating, your legs quivering as he towers you, his arms caging your face.

toji smiles, kissing your cheek as his thrusts keep getting faster and faster. “you're such a good girl, taking my cock like the good little whore that you are... ah fuck-!” he curses, feeling your hands clawing at his back. he looks at your face, feeling his cock twitches at the sight.

“I'm... I'm gonna cum again...” you try to speak, your eyes rolling back as his mushroom tip pushes against your cervix, making you arch your back and see stars.

“let it all go for me Y/N, I'm here for you.” just what you needed to hear. you whimper a weak “daddy” one last time as shockwaves of pleasure run through your body, your pussy spasming and throbbing around his cock. your vision goes blank, all you can hear is the voice of toji throwing praises at you against your ear while he tries his best not to lose his mind to the feeling of you gushing all over him.

“good girl... you really do have the best pussy god damn it...” the rest of his sentence is just a gasp, his hands shaking slightly as he can feel himself getting closer and closer to his own release.

“breed me... daddy. please breed me...” you manage to plead through your hazy state and who is he to deny you when you asked so sweetly? with his hands firmly gripping your waist he cums deep inside you, releasing a string of moans that sounds like music to your ears.

you feel so full once he's done, your body still twitching under him as he finally comes down from his high, and the first thing he does is to pepper your face with kisses, sweetly humming when he feels you running your hands through his hair.

“good fucking god... I don't think I've ever been so turned on in my life...” he sighs, laughing a little and falling on his back next to you. he reaches out for your hand, kissing the back of it. it must be a dream, how are you still not waking up?...

“I really meant what I said earlier. I'm proud of you... you took that cock so well...” he laughs in a low voice when you gently hit his chest, his right arm circling around your waist to bring you closer to his body.

“no but for real... I'm proud of you, I'll give you all the love you deserve.”

jjk masterlist

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jjk headcanons #jjk smut #jjk imagines #jujutsu kaisen imagines #toji smut #toji fushiguro headcanons #toji x you #toji headcanons #toji x reader #toji fushiguro x you #toji fushiguro smut #toji fushiguro x reader

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shaisuki · 1 year

Note

Hiiiii it's the anon who sent the anon message about reading your Itoshi Rin smuts before falling asleep HAHA! After revisiting your blog, u have no idea how bIG my eyes went when you posted a reply, especially when I kept brainstorming ideas (smut most of the time) on what I should request from you! ;;; "Should it be Omegaverse dynamic with Alpha!Rin? How about a wholesome moment that can lead to smut or something yandere where Rin discovers that he has feelings for chubby!fem?? What about an Owl shapeshifter! Rin where chubby gurl had to take care of him when she saw Owl!Rin in bad shape?? What about Rin reluctantly playing a dating simulator because of Bachira's dare and soon falling in love with a character who is chubby!fem (this one is inspired when I was playing BlueLock world champion but it's not an otome game-- but hey! I help mah husband get better at soccer <3) There are so many things... That's why I only mentioned 4... You can pick from any of them if you'd like :DD

A CLAIM FOR NEED

ALPHA! ITOSHI RIN X OMEGA! CHUBBY READER

content warnings ─── omegaverse, alpha! rin, omega reader pretending to be a beta, mating, marking, knotting, rutting, noncon/duncon, breeding, sabotage, dacryphilia, marking, scenting, cunnilingus, stalking, inaccurate details about omegaverse. do forgive me, it's my first time writing.

notes. i'll call you rin anon. i'll gladly write your ideas nonnie. you're a fucking genius and this ideas are simply superb and i had a hard time choosing all of your ideas and my inbox and messages are always open for you nonnie. i hope i did this one justice T_T.

ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ hiding your status as an omega didn't escape from the heightened senses of the popular alpha in your school and with this, he has the right to claim you.

“i don't know.”

“will she be okay?”

"society is unkind with the likes of hers."

it gets repetitive. how your mother worries about you. it's the same damned words like you were helpless. being born an omega you were doomed or more likely unfortunate. society is now crawling with alphas, who are the dominant and top of the hierarchy. betas who are in the middle with their average roles in society and omegas. the very bottom whose role is to serve and be submissive for their alphas and have their pups. you've grown to hate from what you're born in. a female omega, nonetheless. you could have been an alpha or a beta who lives in not so demanding roles for them.

growing up, you learn how to blend and to pretend to be a beta to protect yourself. dosing yourself with the right amount of heat suppressants. learn to act like one. not too demure or dominant at things. you've done anything just to avoid suspicions of being the lower of the crop. your mother insisting that this is the way you'll be safe until your rightful mate will claim you and to avoid being raped by an alpha who's in a rut. you don't want to be shamed and the latter regretting for fucking you.

aside from that, you don't look like the typical omega. while they have the lithe and smaller bodies, yours was softer and bigger than the typical omega. you were grateful for it. nobody had ever raised suspicions on you being a omega.

well, for the untrained ones and hasn't sharpened their instincts no one but for those who mastered and got their senses honed to detect, you were hopeless but it's the adults who are mated and you only get a raised brows from them and a nod understanding your situation.

except for one, itoshi rin.

your school's soccer superstar and an alpha. unlike any other students who are still exploring their traits, rin had developed his. too mature for his own good and too dominant. always have shown his superiority and exudes dominance in others without efforts. despite this and his growing popularity in school. rin is still an unmated alpha. the number of omegas surrounds him and hoped to be his mate but never approached him, not risking to be rejected. there's wooing and courting but he paid them no mind.

alphas like rin is the people you avoid. you had heard and met with accidents with omegas going to an early heat due to alphas emitting pheromones even it's unintentional and you don't want to end up like them even with your heat suppressants. you don't want to blow up your cover. it's the only way to make you safe.

interactions can't be avoided wether it's a brief passing in the hallways and or in the same room with rin, you felt uncomfortable. maybe you're too protected or not used to his domineering presence. it gives you the creeps and you don't want setting your heat early with alphas like rin surrounding you.

it wasn't hard to notice you. rin wasn't in a rush to mate or claim someone in his own desires. he's a rising superstar. he couldn't be bothered with such needs. an alpha like him could get everything he wants when he desired when he's in the top of his own career but there's always a rock in his way and it's you. from the day he first met you, he knew you were hiding something from these society. you were an omega pretending to be a beta. it's unheard of but it's possible. you were the proof it and everyone's stupid for not noticing it.

pretend all you want but it didn't escape him your alluring scent and the small habits omegas have. the frown etched in your face when you're surrounded or near the alphas or how you avoid the crowd. his keen sense of smell taking a whiff of your scent permeating in the air. undetected by others but to him it's always the first whenever you're near. warm honey being drizzled in freshly baked goods and it reminds of him of the happy times. rin had enough troubles but it wasn't bad to claim you. a omega pretending to be a beta. it would be interesting.

rin understands when wanting someone like you, it would be difficult. he tried his advances to you but it only backfires on him. you were too eluded. always avoiding him like his presence suffocates you. brief conversations and a nod when you avoid him just to pass suspicions from you being an omega but you could be careless at times. play dumb with him and he'll show you whose stupid for refusing him.

what simple would turn complicated when rin and his alpha inside him screams for you. needed you. not wanting to scare you from him and to claim you. mark you as his and be his mate forever. you will give him strong, healthy pups with that soft, plump body of yours. ready to be bred and marked by him.

rin had known your certain habits on blending with everyone and that little secret of pretending someone you're not. oh, it would bear fruit from his hard labors from getting you out of that made up status of yours. why would you pretend someone you're not. Is it the fear of being deemed as useless? proving that you can be independent? rin could give you that. he'll use you until you fully submit to him. freedom? he can't do nothing much from that when you'll be his. he will give you all the love and pampering that any omega can have. he will make sure of it.

then rin started to create his own ways to get you. far as getting from stealing your heat suppressants. getting your medical records in the nurse's office. memorizing your heat cycles and the subtle release of pheromones to get you in heat. he knows by doing this it will be a way to get you closer to him and make your omega need him. it's almost there, he needed to be patient.

you got used to the idea of being a beta that you forgot to be an omega sometimes. years of mastery with the intention of self-preservation was always on your mind. wanting a life of your own choice and not run by the instinct from the traits you were born in. perhaps you're one in a million. seen the cruelness and unfairness the society have to offer for someone like you.

looking at the nearly empty seats in the classrooms with a few students gearing up to go home. you decided it was time for you. cleaning the clutters in your desk and putting your chair after getting your bag then you went to replace your shoes placing your indoor shoes inside the shoe locker and began to go home. passing in the football field and that's when you began to notice the changes in your body. you had been going back and forth in the restrooms for today and getting a little moodier than the usual. it's a sign that you're going into heat in the next days and the heat suppressants you were taking lately seemed to taste a little different? you shrugged it off. this isn't the first time it happened to you and you were kind of glad. you still have the time to formulate what kind of excuses to make for your absences due to your heat. you should go home now, noticing the sun going down for the moon to show. you began to walk away.

upon walking you notice someone else is going towards your way. it's just a student going back for something they forgot and upon closer look and the scent of him, you recognized it was itoshi rin. you tried not to flinch and dread settled in your stomach. you don't want to be around him, not with the telltale signs of your incoming heat and risking of finding out that you were pretending. you could almost let out a sigh of relief before a voice called you.

"i think you forgot something." his voice echoing in the quietness of the place. turning around, your eyes widens. rin stands there in his lax posture, holding out a bottle of your supposedly heat suppressants. you swallowed the lump in your throat and composing yourself in front of him. feigning innocence and what he was implying at you.

"it's not mine and i don't take those." you calmly stated. looking at the bottle of pills in his hands and to his face. he doesn't show any emotions. examining the bottle in his grasp. "oh, really?" he asks you in a neutral voice. his words next doesn't prepare you from the chills creeping up in your spine.

"you're not a beta, are you? i'm sure of it." his teal eyes getting cloudy at his accusations at you. the words got stuck in your throat. you can only shake your head at him and you were a bit angry at him for making such accusations at you when it's true and you have your own decision for this one.

"you can fool everyone but not to me. an omega like you pretending to be a beta, how foolish." there's a condescending tone in his voice like it was foolish to pretend and it stung. easy for him to say that. he was born an alpha. he didn't had to go through difficulties like you had.

rin could smell the sudden change in your scent. it's smells something burnt. he may have upset you and he can see you chewing your lips.

your shoulders shakes. he doesn't have the right to tell you that. "yeah. i'm pretending to be one. so what? it's none of your business." you snapped at him. angry and frustrated at the world for being born an omega. "i have my reasons and if that bothers you that much, leave me..."

the words dies at their own. suddenly you can't continue. the world starts to spin and you were feeling lightheaded. your heart rate spiking up and you caught the scent of pheromones in full blast. the earthy tones of his scent invading your senses and you can't help the need to submit to him but you fought the urge to do so. with the last of your remaining senses and not your omega controlling your feelings you ran away from him.

after that you made sure you were far from him. there were tears of frustration rolling in your cheeks. all of your pretend, your hard work crumbling for that one confrontation. the streets were empty. kamakura wasn't a populous place in the first place and only known for tourists spot's. looking around, you were alone which is good. leaving you with a problem of your own. itoshi rin, the school's superstar knows your secret. he won't be that cruel to tell the world that you're a omega pretending to be a beta, right?

you were broke out in your thoughts when you feel the all too familiar cramp in your stomach. you though you couldn't breath, followed by a warm gush of slick between your legs and you were delirious.

no. no. no. no.

this couldn't be happening. no fucking way. the stress and rin blasting his pheromones at you must have triggered your heat. you couldn't do anything but to feel helpless.

stupid. stupid. stupid.

you were so angry at yourself for being an omega, for being you. how could you handle your heat alone when you're from home and you don't want to walk in the streets with you on heat. think. you need to think. remembering that there is safety rooms for when omegas set their heat on early until it passes out.

rin watched as you ran away from him. he could really give the effect he have on you. what you sow is what you reap and rin could finally get you. the confrontation that just happened and your heat coming early from him emitting his scent and how you're body reacted from it. you are to be his mate and no one could say so from it.

with your heat triggering, it doesn't take too long to trigger his. allowing him to sync with your heat and his rut, with that he's rightfully your mate. all it needs is to find and knot and claim you.

following you with the trail of your scent in the air. rin found you distressed and on the verge of tears. such a sight to behold. your toughness and made-up personality slowly crumbling for your heat to take over. it made him drool, wiping and he can feel the familiar tightness of his pants and the snarl in his lips. the desire burning in his insides.

the air in your lungs leaves you as you topple and your back hitting the hard tile of one of the rooms designated for omegas who got their early heat. your mind in a haze as you got pinned down and the scent of an alpha belonging to rin. from the way his eyes are wide and dilated and the indescribable strength he have. he's in a rut. that frightens you, you don't want this.

all of your life being an omega isn't something you can describe as pleasant even your mother who is one can say the same thing. you were conceived early, crushing your mother's dream. you don't want suffering in the same fate as hers.

it's instinct they say, for alphas and omegas to mate but with the likes of rin, it's a form of mockery. it's a way of saying you don't have a freedom for yourself to choose. the thought bringing tears to your eyes. you don't want this and a form of rebellion of this life who had nothing but to loathe the likes of you, you rejected him.

"i don't want you."

rin halts his movements. surprised at the words coming from your mouth. rejecting him. you're a stubborn one and he thought omegas are submissive. you're the flawed one in the system or it's the effects of the heat suppressants and the mindset of being a beta for too long.

"brave of you to deny me but i can knock some sense in you or would you like me to knock you up, huh? knock you up with my pups and be a good omega of mine."

he can sense another shift in you. your scent getting sweeter and your squirming lessening. it's like you were slowly entering in subspace. your omega instincts kicking in against your own will. you're an interesting one and rin loves that. it would be easier for him to mark you. always had been his desire. the sudden change bringing pride to him and his alpha getting territorial by the minute. you were ready.

"you want that, 'mega? want to carry my pups?"

he taunts and he didn't give you a word to reply, only to crash his lips into yours. the aggressive muscle of his mouth clashing into yours. claiming the insides of your mouth and swirling it inside and with your instincts, you returned it with such fervor. drool escaping in the corners of your mouths. it was the sloppy, wet and aggressive kind of kiss that reflects the desire.

what once holding your wrists now wanders in the expanse of your body and it finds in the home of your uniform's buttons before it was ripped. the sound of your clothing being teared resonating in the place.

a string of saliva connecting on both of your lips when rin broke the kiss. too impatient and greedy. sweat beading in his forehead. pants too tight to be comfortable and fuck, your scent is intoxicating.

you're helpless under him. too dizzy to function and you can't help but to think this will be the end of your days as free.

"please, no." there is that voice in yours that still surfaces despite your raging hormones. the want not to succumb in being mated. you valued being free than anything.

this seems to anger rin. his aggression heightening towards you and from your words. why the hell did you not want to be mated when you two are destined and had this unbreakable bond of being mates. he believed in that for too long. to know the differences between love and just a simple logic of instincts.

he cups your jaw in his hand. squishing the flesh with his fangs baring. snarling and seething with anger from your refusal. is it that hard or you were too corrupted in your thinking.

"why must you deny me? you're mine from the moment i set my eyes on you!" his voice furious and you can't help but to wince. the tears freely rolls in your cheeks.

this affected rin, seeing how hurt and distressed you are from being forced by him. he can't help it. why you must hurt him too. you were his. can you just accept that? it would be easier for him and to you. he'll be good to you.

although frustrated at your defiance at him, he instinctively scents you. let his scent calm you. it takes effect when your tears are nothing but streaks. engulfed in the scent of him with the aroma of something primal and crisp.

it eases rin when you've calmed down a bit. alphas are know to have to little or no self-restraint at all but rin is different. trained himself to have control when it comes to time where he'll be mated to his rightful mate. a contrast to what he did to you.

you were his. it always was. they say alphas are drawn to what what their mates smells like and it came to a surprise to him when a beta like you possessing such qualities a omega have and thus born his suspicions and the confirmation bringing an edge to it. it's also whenever you're near, he's content and fulfilled. you were his destined mate. the piece of the missing part of his puzzle. it was his right to claim you no matter what your reasons are.

you were calm. dangerously calm. your fears and worries fading as you inhale to the scent of his. your heart fluttering and you can't help but to look at him. intense and stoically handsome. the lines in his faces defined. this was your alpha. who claims you to be his and yet, this will be the time you will finally succumb to your desires. this was nature.

"alpha..."

mewling at him and rin could feel the surge of pride bubbling in his chest. his sweet omega calling out to him. your hands raising in attempt of reaching out to him. your eyes lidded and pleading for him. this is the real of you. no more pretending, no hiding from him.

rin holds your wrists and like any other alpha would do their omega. he brought it to his lips, nuzzling into the scent gland in your wrists and you squirmed. there's a hiccup followed by your thighs rubbing each other.

he can smell the sweet arousal dripping out from your cunt. he couldn't wait to get a taste out of it.

his lovely omega. kissing your wrists and your arms before leaning down to kiss you. his lips moving to your mouth, then to your jaw and the scent gland in your neck where he can smell you. the sweet scent tickling his nose making his nostrils flare. inhaling the scent his omega is emitting before taking a huge lick out of it. the action sending tremors in your body, making you mewl more for him.

your body on fire and more slick gushing out from you. you couldn't think anymore at this point or you're too tired to care. your efforts and hardwork of protecting yourself is nothing to him. could you accept it? a life with him? your body screams for him. it aches for him. your soul calls for him. can you deny it with your whole being screaming for him? is this what you really want?

perhaps the answer was there all along. presented in front of you but you're too absorbed in blending with the others. there's a voice in your head telling you, could you do it? you're still in the constant battle with yourself but with instinct and nature. you could barely much do so.

rin is the answer for all of this. he found out and now he's here. claiming you for his own. you couldn't stop him when he's already in between your legs. sniffing through your panties, soaked with your slick. your body jerks, a mewl slipping in your mouth and rin is pleased with your reaction.

sliding off your panties and his mouth waters at the sight. your fat pussy glistening in slick and arousal. the fleshy mound and the glistening folds of your puffy cunt bare in front and rin shivers when his tongue got the first taste of you. licking through your folds and the sweet taste of your cunt bouncing in his tongue. lapping up the newly slick coming out from your hole with such want. you taste damn good and it's expected for his omega.

"r-rin..." your voice trembles at the sensation of his tongue in your folds. your hips arching from the intrusion and your slick gushing like waterfalls. his tongue gliding to your hole and sucks into your clit that throbs and twitches at the attention given by him.

rin grips your wide hips while your pillowy thighs crushing his head and isn't bothered by it. engrossed of giving the utmost pleasure to his omega that will leave you wanting for more. he rips a deep moan from you when his tongue prods at your aching hole and it spurs him more. he needs more and so he licks it, wiggles his tongue and with a scream you came into his tongue but it doesn't stop him. greedily lapping at your sweet essence until you were quenched of relief for awhile.

licking his lips, rin discarded his uniform. throwing it at the side. his cock aching with the intention of pumping you full of his cum and bearing his pups. there's nothing than fulfilling to see you full and swollen.

hungry eyes gazes at you. rin thought nobody could ever look so vulnerable as you. body splayed in front of him. your slick coating your inner thighs and your chest heaves in every breath you take. lips swollen and there's a whine coming from you. begging for him to take you. what defiance earlier is nothing but a husk of your former self. this is what you truly are. a needy omega who have nothing but the desire to be taken care of by him and for the younger itoshi he's more than willing to do that as your alpha and your mate.

hovering above your quivering body, rin grabbed your hands. kissing them before leaning down to lick your tears. it was a distraction before slowly entering your quivering heat. rin growls at the sensation of his length being wrapped around you. your walls spasming around him. welcoming him with eagerness that leaves him no doubt that you were his.

it earns a whine from you, being stretched that it leaves you crying. your hymen breaks at the intrusion of his length but all you could do is take what you were given. followed by the protest leaving at your lips. the fear of being pregnant at this early stage of your life.

"rin, stop. w-what if i get pregnant?" you asked him but he only growls, feeling the tight heat of your pussy stretching around him.

"then so be it." he replied. grunting at the spasm of your walls accommodating him.

"i-i don't want to.."

"you will." he snarls when completely bottoms out at you. his knot at the base of his cock hitting your folds so sweetly that slick gathers at the hole of your clenching pussy at him.

"you're going to be a good 'mega and mate for me don't you?" raising your legs and hooking it up to his shoulders before snapping his hips at yours. his full length crashing at your insides with a desperate need with an intention to breed and procreate with you.

you were left with no protests, his full speed hitting you in such depths that you can only mewl and cry out for him. holding his shoulders while he buried himself deep inside. take and take. that's what you did. letting himself bruise you from how rough he is and drool starts to escape from the corners of your mouth.

seeing you cock drunk and eyes dazed from him breeding you and your heat in full blow. rin captures your mouth with his. the wet muscle of his mouth encircling your insides to claim territory while he basks in your scent. it wouldn't be too long before he marked you as his. claim you to be his and forever to be yours.

his chest rubbing into your breasts while he got you pressed in his body. he can feel the very bits of your soft tummy jiggling upon the impact of his hips. it feels so divine to be this close to you. your flesh in his rock hard abs. he can't wait to see you growing with his pups.

rin swallows your moans, that's a good mate for him. you were truly bonded with him and his chest swells with pride. all his plans coming into bearing in such fruition. this is what you are to him.

breaking the kiss to lick the scent glands in your neck, such actions leaves your body into sensitivity. you can feel everything around him. his scent, his length shaping your hole in his, his breathy moans and the growl he keeps emitting. everything felt so right about him. you were in no state lucid as you keep thinking about him. you crave everything about him but at this moment you want nothing but his knot to fill you up. have his babies and be a good mate for him.

with rin's animalistic thrusts of your abused hole. it doesn't take too long before you creamed around him. "alpha..." you call out to him. your legs trembling around him and your supple thighs ripples at your orgasm.

rin instinctively pushed his knot around you when your orgasm came. locking it tight around your hole with no chance of his healthy semen seeping every crevice of your pussy and to your cervix. ensuring fertility of your future pups with him. spurts after spurts of his cum endlessly releasing inside of you and you willingly took it. locking your legs around his hips in which both of you moaned out.

"you're my sweet 'mega, aren't you?"

nuzzling at your neck before he bites it. there's a tremble and a gasp. you were finally his. you were tied to him, forever and it brings out such joy in rin's heart. having you to be by his side forever. no walks about stupid dreams and wants you have. you will only think of him and only him.

"yours, alpha." you moaned out.

and in a series of wants and needs, you are nothing but his omega and sweet mate.

#♱ ⋮ shai's works⸝⸝#blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock x chubby reader #chubby reader #itoshi rin x y/n #itoshi rin #itoshi rin x you #omegaverse #rin itoshi x reader #itoshi rin x chubby reader #yandere alpha #yandere x chubby reader #yandere blue lock x reader #yandere blue lock

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chiriwritesstuff · 9 months

Text

The Girl in IT - 3. Vroom Vroom

A Boss! Joel Miller x IT Specialist F! Reader AU

The LIST │ Series Masterlist

Chapter Rating: E (18+, MDNI)

Chapter Preview: "I want that Model X. Blacked out. The one that drives itself." He nods approvingly, not bothering to conceal his satisfaction. "Done. Anything else?" You can't help but scoff at the audacity. "Just like that?" "Just like that." "Come on, Joel. You don't just surprise employees with new cars out of the blue." "Well, lucky for you, you're not just any employee."

Chapter Warnings & Tags: No outbreak AU, Boss x Employee Relationship, Sugar Daddy Lite, Daddy Kink, Smut, SO MUCH SMUT, Age Gap, Praise kink, Overstimulation, Squirting, Older Man/Younger woman, So much dirty talk, DD/lg (kinda? they're both into it), Vaginal Fingering, Exhibitionism, No PIV (yet), Virgin Reader

Word Count: 6K

A/N & Chapter Notes: Two birthdays, ten years apart.

This is filthy, and I have no regrets.

Hope you enjoy!

Ten Years Earlier.

Joel lingers outside your house, the lively sounds of your 26th birthday party spilling into the night air through open windows. He adjusts the collar of his chambray button-down, opting for a change from his usual flannel attire. With his hair slicked back and facial hair neatly trimmed, he sighs, contemplating the small bouquet of sunflowers he acquired from a nearby florist.

His mind goes to the conversation he had with the florist earlier.

"Sunflowers? That's an interesting choice." The florist smiles, gently taking the flowers from his hand. "Did you need this wrapped? Maybe a bit of ribbon?"

Joel nods. "Please. It's for—"

The florist glances at him, a twinkle in her eyes as she observes his nervous demeanor. "Did you know that the sunflower symbolizes adoration? It's the perfect flower to give to someone you're interested in."

"Oh, it's nothing like that, It's for a... a friend. It's her birthday today."

The florist gives Joel a wry look. "If she's just a friend, might I suggest daisies? Surely they would be more appropriate and cheaper—"

Joel shakes his head. "The sunflowers," he motions to her hand. "Please."

He smiles at the memory, looking at the bouquet once more, knowing he made the right choice.

He spots you through the window, the vibrant yellow of your sundress gracefully accentuating your curves, creating an ethereal silhouette that seems to glow, like a beacon of light calling out to him. His breath catches in his throat as he watches you. A genuine laugh escapes you, a sound that always catches him off guard, echoing through the air with a light that he finds irresistible.

"Joel," your father approaches, his expression clearly showing his displeasure. "What are you doing here?"

"Hello Sir, Well, I'm here for a birthday party, and-" he lifts the invitation, "I believe I was invited."

"I can see that, but the question is why. Surely, a man of your age at a party filled with twenty-year-olds? Doesn't that seem... odd to you?"

"It's only odd if you make it odd, I reckon."

"Can I ask you a serious question? What are your intentions with my daughter?"

"Well, I would like to wish her a Happy Birthday, maybe eat a little cake-"

"... and how old are you, Joel? aren't you a bit bothered by the fact that your daughter is older than mine?"

"... well, she's not, sir." Joel smiles, "She's older than Sarah."

Unamused, your father continues. "I'm going to level with you. I'm not about to let my daughter be swept away by some middle-aged man barely scraping by." He shoots Joel a stern look, shaking his head in disapproval. "My daughter deserves the world, and quite frankly, I won't have her settle for someone beneath her. Not for some small-time contractor."

"Sir, that's not my intention at all. Sugar invited me, and-"

He shakes his head in disgust. "I think you should go, Joel. Take your flowers and go. You're lucky I let you still have this job."

Joel nods in defeat, his gaze lingering on you through the window. He takes a final appreciative look at you, radiant in your yellow dress, and offers a warm smile. Turning towards your father, he speaks with sincerity, "I apologize for any disturbance, sir." Joel strides purposefully towards his truck, adding, "Please convey my regrets to your wife."

Present day.

Joel: Hey Sugar, did you head out to the office yet? Sugar: Hi Mr. Miller, Good Morning! No, I haven't. Still getting ready. Should be heading out in 15. Did you need something? Did you get locked out of the company portal again? I told you that we change passwords every six months, I wrote it on a sticky note for you like you asked! Joel: No, Sugar, I haven't. It concerns me how little faith you have in me. I am not that hopeless! For your information, I am not in the office yet. Sugar: Oh? So it wasn't you and Ellie trying to figure out how you managed to print the printer manual ten times over last week? Joel: I'm sure that was Tommy, but it's ok, I forgive you. Anyway, does this mean you're still at home? Sugar: Sure, Joel. Ellie would say otherwise. Yes?? Joel: ??? Not sure if you're at home? Sugar: No. Yes. I'm at home. Joel: Good. I'm outside.

"Joel," you say, locking your front door, looking surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm kidnapping you for the day," Joel announces from his truck. "Thought I'd give you a ride to work." He winks as he exits out of the cab, wearing a chambray shirt and jeans instead of his usual work-issued flannel. It's a nice change, being that you didn't think the man owned anything other than flannels. "Come on, I've got coffee and donuts."

You give him a wry smile. "What if I'm not a coffee person?"

Joel presents a coffee to-go cup, a tea bag tag hanging out. "Lucky for you, I've got your favorite green tea."

"Smooth move, Miller," you grin, approaching him and planting a kiss on his cheek. "Very smooth."

"What can I say? I have excellent attention to detail, especially when it comes to you."

"Just not with computers, right?"

"Alright, alright, none of your teasing this morning, why don't you hop in," Joel grins, holding the passenger door open for you. You slide into the truck, still puzzled by his unexpected visit.

As he drives away, the scenery doesn't match the route to the office. You raise an eyebrow, looking at Joel with a playful smirk. "This doesn't look like the way to work. Where are we going?"

"Well, if I told you, then it would ruin the surprise, now would it?"

You snort. "What's happening today that's so important it warrants a surprise?"

Joel glances at you, a wide smile on his face. "A little birdy told me that it's someone's birthday today."

"Yeah and? It doesn't mean that we blow work off, I actually have a scheduled meeting with Tess today-"

"Fuck Tess."

You frown. "Joel, be serious."

"I am serious. I handled Tess. She's fine, don't you worry your pretty little head off, she's ok with pushing back to tomorrow."

You look at him warily, sighing. "I got a bad feeling about this."

Joel reaches over and kisses your forehead. "Don't frown, baby. None of that nonsense is allowed when we're together, okay? Just let me do something nice for you on your birthday. Nothing too crazy, promise."

"Why do I have the feeling that you don't mean that?"

Joel drives into the mall's parking lot, heading towards Neiman Marcus, driving into the nearest parking stall to its entrance.

He cuts the ignition to the truck. "OK, I don't promise. I intend on dragging you into the store whether you like it or not, sliding my shiny Amex to the first salesperson I see, and spoiling the absolute shit outta you. Do you have a problem with that, baby?"

"What if I allow you to spoil me from the comfort of the clearance rack?"

"Sorry to break it to you, baby, but this Amex won't work on anything discounted. Do you know what it means to have a black one of these?"

"That you have a big cock and an even bigger ego?"

"Funny. What it really means is that I can walk into one of them Tesla dealerships and buy you a Model X before you can ask me if I'm being serious." He takes your hand in his. "Because I am. Serious, that is."

You scoff, sinking further into your seat. "You're not going to buy me a Tesla."

He laughs. "Maybe, maybe not. I do know you need a new car, and I know one thing for sure—" He gives you a wry smile as he lifts your chin to face him. "There's no way in hell I'm going to let you drive that damn death trap anymore, Sugar."

"Hey! I'll have you know, I've had that death trap since college, it's the first thing I bought without my father's money!" you huff, "Now that I'm not in the ninth layer of Hell at Best Buy anymore, I can finally afford to buy myself a car. You know, something sensible, like a Kia."

"A Kia? Baby... only more reason for me to buy you a new car. Tell me, if you could have any car, money, and cost be dammed, what would it be? Sky's the limit."

"Seriously?"

He leans in, eyes challenging. "Try me."

"I want that Model X. Blacked out. The one that drives itself."

He nods approvingly, not bothering to conceal his satisfaction. "Done. Anything else?"

You can't help but scoff at the audacity. "Just like that?"

"Just like that."

"Come on, Joel. You don't just surprise employees with new cars out of the blue."

"Well, lucky for you, you're not just any employee."

A smile tugs at your lips, appreciating the unexpected attention. "Really?" you playfully inquire. "So, I'm more than just a random employee, huh?"

Joel gently caresses your chin, offering a small, satisfied smirk.

"No, Sugar, you're not just some random employee," he declares, pressing a chaste kiss on your lips. "You're everything."

"You don't mean that—" you stutter, "Joel, what's going on? Why are you doing this? I'm not someone to be bought or bribed like I'm some sugar baby. I liked you back then, before all of this—"

"When I had nothing? When my company was still in the red, when your father's job was the only one turning a profit," he peers down at you. "What if I told you that I wouldn't be in this position if it weren't for you? If your father didn't talk some sense into me all those years ago, I wouldn't have worked my ass off to get where I am now."

Your eyes narrow. "What are you talking about?"

Joel lets out a heavy sigh, his gaze intense. "Your father made it clear back then that I wasn't good enough for you. He didn't think I was the right fit for you. He did me a favor if I think about it now. It was your father's skepticism that fueled my determination to prove him wrong, to build something from the ground up."

Your mind races, trying to grasp the weight of his revelation. "But why keep it a secret? Why now? You didn't give me any signs that you were interested in me, I even invited you to my birthday party, which you didn't even bother showing up to!"

Joel winces. "Yeah, about that-"

Your face softens. "Wait, Joel, the sunflowers?"

"Your father made sure to point out the inappropriateness of a middle-aged man attending a party full of co-eds. Thinking about it, it wouldn't have been a good look, especially since I couldn't take my eyes off of you, wearing that yellow dress… I was enchanted by you, baby girl."

You blush, smacking his shoulder. "Oh, that dress was horrendous. My mom made me wear it!"

"Well, remind me to thank your mom for giving me the mental image I've had of you all these years."

"You know, that explains why the sunflowers were in the trash can, I thought it was so odd! They were beautiful, by the way. I snuck them out and kept them in my room, you know." You shake your head. "I can't believe my dad would do something like this. I hate that I stuck around for so long. I wish I knew, Joel. Back then. You were the only person I looked forward to coming that night, and when you didn't, I thought-"

"Well, I was there, baby."

"… but you didn't stay! How was I supposed to know?!"

He runs a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated. "I didn't want you to feel like you were settling or that my feelings were tied to any of this. I needed to prove myself first. I didn't want you to think I was using you or that I wasn't good enough for you."

A mix of emotions swirls within you—surprise, confusion, and a hint of realization. "Joel, I had no idea. But why go to such lengths now? Buying me a car, showering me with gifts?"

He looks into your eyes, his expression sincere. "Because, despite everything, my feelings for you have always been genuine. I wanted you to see that I can give you the life you deserve and that I've overcome the doubts from back then. I had nothing to give to you back then, hell, I was being eaten alive by debt, I couldn't put Sarah through college - she worked her ass off trying to get as many scholarships as she could on her own. I wasn't in a position to make you mine, not yet."

"Joel," you say, taking his face in your hands, a sad smile on your face. "Do you think I care about all of this? I would have been with you then, all you had to do was ask."

"Well, I'm asking you now. Will you let me make up for missing your birthday all those years ago up to you?"

You give him a small smile. "Okay."

Joel breathes a sigh of relief. "Okay. Now, get out of the truck and into the store. That's an order."

You share a playful eye roll before complying, opening the truck door, and stepping into the crisp air outside. The familiar chime of the entrance doors signals your arrival at Neiman Marcus.

Joel walks beside you, his arm casually draped around your shoulders as you both make your way into the store. The ambiance of luxury surrounds you, and the scent of high-end perfumes lingers in the air. You can't help but marvel at the elegant displays showcasing the latest in fashion and accessories, the air smelling distinctively expensive and high class, something you would never associate yourself with.

"So, what's the plan?" you ask, hesitation evident in your voice.

Joel grins, steering you towards the women's clothing section. "I'm looking for just the right-" he stops midsentence, his eyes locking onto the stylishly dressed woman lying in wait for her next victim.

"Lenore!" he shouts, "Just the person I was hoping to find."

"Mr. Miller! What a delightful surprise," the saleswoman exclaims, her face lighting up. "What brings you here? how are your girls?"

"They're doing fine, thank you for asking."

"... and who is this pretty baby peeking out from behind you?" she asks, casting a warm smile your way. You instinctively recoil at the unexpected attention, a familiar sensation from the years spent trailing your mother at Neiman’s, deliberately making yourself inconspicuous to deter any unwanted conversations. It felt safer that way, you reflect, offering Lenore a slight smile. "There's our lovely girl. No need to hide behind this old dog; you're far more interesting to look at than he is!"

"Lenore, allow me to introduce you to someone very special—this is Sugar," Joel says with a proud smile, gesturing towards you.

"Sugar, what a sweet name! Pleasure to meet you," Lenore responds, extending a hand in a friendly gesture.

The tension from earlier begins to dissipate as you shake Lenore's hand and manage a genuine smile. "Nice to meet you too, Lenore."

"Sugar, why don't you take a look at the clothes over there and let me talk business with Lenore for a second?" You raise your eyebrows in suspicion, "Maybe you'll see something you like?"

Joel, his eyes gleaming with excitement, leans in and whispers, "Lenore, today is no ordinary day. It's Sugar's birthday, and I'm in the mood to make it special for her. We're going to be spending an obscene amount of money today, so I hope you're ready. You got your work cut out for you, I promise you that."

"Nothing can be as worse than the time I tried to convince Ellie to wear a gown for the prom last year," she winces, "Sorry about that again, Mr. Miller." She slides up beside Joel, flashing him a knowing smirk. "How obscene are we talking?"

Joel hands over his sleek black Amex, and Lenore's eyes widen in surprise. "Obscene. Don't let her talk you out of something because of the price, hell, rip off the damn tags if you have to." He steals a quick glance back at you, a vision standing amongst the designer goods, a subtle smile on his face. He glances at Lenore once more. "Do we have an understanding?"

The saleswoman nods her head frantically, pocketing the Amex in her pocket, the weight of it making an indentation through her blazer. "Understood, Mr. Miller. I'll fetch you a coffee and set up a seat for you in her dressing room. Is there anything else?

Joel nods. "Yeah. Do your worst, Lenore."

Lenore gives Joel one last look as she heads towards you, not hiding the fact that you look like a deer caught in the headlights. She places a hand on the small of your back. "Come along dear, we're on a mission." She gives you a conspiratorial smile. "You're in desperate need of Celine."

Lenore scrutinizes you for a moment, gently lifting your arms to assess your form. "I take it you're a size 10?"

Surprised, you ask, "How did you know?"

"Honey, I've been here for the last twenty years. Not only can I tell your dress and bra size, but I've also mastered the subtle art of reading people." She confidently places her hands on your hips, nodding to herself. "People are not as secretive as they think. I can dissect their entire life story the moment they walk in the door."

Curious, you inquire, "Oh? And what conclusion did you make about me?"

Lenore begins rifling through the racks, selecting a few monochromatic pieces. "Well, you seem to go through life trying to hide yourself."

"Is it that obvious?" you ask with a hint of self-awareness.

Lenore continues her assessment, her experienced eyes scanning the clothing options she's pulled out. "You go through life trying to hide yourself," she repeats, her tone thoughtful. "But, sweetheart, hiding doesn't mean you're weak or scared. It means you've faced challenges, learned to protect yourself."

She steps back, considering you with a knowing gaze. "We all wear different masks, dear. It's just a matter of finding the one that feels right for the occasion. Now, tell me, what's the story behind the layers you've wrapped yourself in?"

"Well..." you bite your lip thoughtfully, "Today is my 36th birthday. My mom, she had me when she was 26. By the time she was my age, she had her whole life figured out - the husband, the kid, the house. I remember thinking how much I wanted that for myself, how I thought my life would go... and now, at 36," you pause, sighing, "I don't have any of that. I'm not married, I don't have any kids, and I rent an absurdly overpriced shoebox that I share with my cat," you softly chuckle to yourself.

"It's not like I haven't tried to put myself out there. I have—met a few people, went on a couple of dates, which—I felt like wasn't terrible, you know?" You admire a sheath dress on the rack, adding it to the growing pile of pieces Lenore has accumulated. "...but it was always just a first date, and then rejection, maybe if they were kind, but most of the time I never hear from them again. After a while, after I hit 30, I just... stopped. I stopped trying to put myself out there. It's exhausting, and I can't keep wondering what makes me so undesirable."

"Sometimes... Sometimes I feel like I'm defective, too broken for anyone, not good enough to have the kind of life I want."

"Sweetheart, life rarely follows the script we write for it. Comparing your journey to your mother's or anyone else's is like comparing apples to oranges. Each story is unique, and yours is still unfolding," she reassures you.

She continues sorting through the clothes, selecting pieces that seem to resonate with your style. "Now, about those layers you wear," she begins, her focus returning to the task at hand. "Perhaps it's time to shed the expectations and judgments, not just from others but also from yourself. These layers, they're not defects; they're experiences that have shaped you."

Lenore hands you a beautifully tailored blazer and nods approvingly. "Try this on. Let's see how it feels."

As you slip into the blazer, Lenore continues, "You deserve a life that brings you joy, and that starts with accepting yourself. When you embrace who you are, others will too. It's not about being 'good enough'; it's about being authentically you."

Lenore, her hands expertly moving through the racks, pauses for a moment, her gaze thoughtful. "And what about Mr. Miller?" she asks with a knowing smile. "There's a story there too, isn't it?"

You glance at her, surprised by her perceptiveness. "Joel? Well, we've known each other for ten years, but we've only worked together for six months. There's nothing more to it than that."

Lenore raises an eyebrow. "Sweetheart, I've been around enough to recognize when there's something more. The way he looks at you, the way he cares—it goes beyond the confines of a professional relationship."

You hesitate, unsure of how to respond. Lenore gently continues, "I've seen people in love, and I've seen people trying to hide it. Joel's got a soft spot for you, dear. It's written all over him."

"Is it? because with my track record, all it feels like is me waiting for the other shoe to drop. I like him... I've liked him", you correct yourself, "...for a very long time. I tried to put myself out there to him back then, only for him to reject me. What makes me different now? What didn't I have then?"

Lenore listens attentively, her gaze filled with compassion. "Sweetheart, people change, circumstances change. What may not have worked before doesn't define your worth or potential now. Maybe back then, Joel wasn't ready or didn't see what was right in front of him. It doesn't mean you lacked anything—it just wasn't the right time."

She pauses, choosing her words carefully. "Love can be messy, complicated, and unpredictable. But if you feel something for Joel, and there's a chance he feels the same now, it's worth exploring. Give yourself permission to embrace the present without being burdened by the past." She gives you one last smile, her tiny frame effortlessly handling the mountain of clothes with an ease that comes with her years of experience. "Come on, we can't leave Mr. Miller waiting. He's already waiting for you in your dressing room."

Joel is already seated in the room one would call a dressing room, a vast space encapsulated by mirrors. Lenore places the clothes on the rack, giving the two of you one last-knowing nod as she makes her way to the door. "I'll give you guys some privacy," she winks, her hands on the doorknob. "You just holler if you need anything, okay?" You smile meekly at her as Joel nods. "Thank you, Lenore."

"Well', you breathe, making your way to the center of the room, taking it all in. "This is... something."

"It is, right? Perfect amount of mirrors to admire your form."

"It's just... a lot, Joel. I'm not used to seeing myself like this."

"Like what, baby?" He asks, making his way over to you as you fiddle nervously in place. Tenderly, he envelops you in his arms, hands brushing away stray strands of hair behind your ears. "Turn around and face the mirror," he softly directs, gently guiding you by the hips. You find yourself in front of the mirror, Joel standing behind you, his eyes locking with yours as his hands trace down your silhouette, fingers deftly navigating the buttons of your blouse.

"Let me paint a picture for you," Joel whispers in your ear, his eyes locked with yours through the mirror as he delicately starts to unbutton. "I see someone who drives me fucking crazy." Pausing at the last button, he eases your top from the waistband of your skirt, peeling the fabric from your skin to unveil the modest cotton bralette you chose for the day. "Beautiful," he breathes, slipping your top from your shoulders. A shiver runs through you as his hands graze your skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake.

"You think you can hide yourself behind all of these clothes but I see you, Sugar. I've seen what's inside, and I would like to get to know that girl that's begging to come out of that shell of yours." His fingers linger on the elastic at your waist, his eyes silently asking for consent. You nod, taking a deep breath as he slowly slides your skirt down your hips, leaving you standing against him in just your underthings, your body suddenly on fire as he continues to hold you against him. You swear you can feel the hardness of his desire from behind as he continues to caress you, his eyes never leaving yours. "Will you show me?"

His fingers find the skin of your torso, and you shudder and gasp at how it suddenly ignites you, the fire you kept dormant for so long suddenly ablaze from his ministrations, leaving you breathless. He places wet open-mouthed kisses along the length of your neck, his eyes never leaving yours as his fingers start to travel down to your waist.

The corner of his mouth creeps slowly upwards. "Are you going to let me show you just how much I fucking adore you?"

You swallow thickly, nodding absentmindedly as you find yourself caught in his web, exactly where he wants you. "Yes", you whisper, "Please, Joel."

"Do you know how long I've waited for you?" he whispers, his fingertips grazing the outline of your panties, inching lower and lower, the sensation driving you mad with want. You instinctively rub your thighs together, your body craving more friction than what's currently being provided. Joel tsks at the gesture, shaking his head at you through the mirror. "You keep these legs spread for me, baby." His fingers wander upwards, hooking onto the elastic of your underwear, as he watches you closely, a question written across his face. He quirks his eyebrow at you curiously.

It was all you needed to know just exactly what he was asking.

You give him a tiny nod.

"Use your words, baby girl. I need to know for sure that this is what you want. I need you to be specific," he commands, his fingers twitching against your skin.

"Please Joel," you whisper, the entirety of your body trembling against his, "Please undress me."

He grins wickedly as he complies, the fabric slipping slowly down your hips, peeling gently down your legs. "I remember the day we first met at your house, how shy and skittish you were. I remember what you wore, even then," he says, taking his time, your panties caught on the ankle of your foot. He tugs them free, his eyes darkening as he realizes that they are soaked through with your slick, glistening under the lowlight of the dressing room.

You swear you hear his breath quickening as he holds them high against the light in reverence, tucking the scrap piece of fabric into his back pocket.

"Did you know that you were going to see me that day?" he asks, turning his attention back to you. "Is that why you didn't bother to wear a bra under that shirt of yours?" He shakes his head slowly as he places his hands on your hips once more, his fingers slowly making their way down to your inner thighs. "It was downright indecent, the fabric was so thin I could practically see your tits," his voice sounds more considerably wrecked as he slides his fingers upwards until they hit your slit, a calloused finger expertly parting your lips until they reach the button of your clit.

He stops. "Have you ever let anyone touch you like this before?"

You shake your head in response, your body arching against his as you desperately seek his touch. "I came close once, back in college, but I-" your voice gets caught in your throat as Joel eases his finger through your lips once more, his fingertips at the precipice of your entrance. You can't help the moan that escapes your lips. He pulls his fingers away from your heat as he reaches into his back pocket, reaching for your panties as he holds the wad of fabric against your mouth. "Open," he commands, stuffing your mouth with the fabric, the tang of your slick so sharp it makes your mouth water even more. "This is a public place, baby, I can't risk us getting kicked out because you can't control yourself, you hear? Nod if you understand me."

You nod.

"Good." He bends forwards slightly, his fingers parting your slit once more, your pussy lips quivering as he gathers your slick, his fingertips breaching your entrance once more. "I know you're still a virgin, Sugar", he breathes as he kisses your neck once more, his eyes locking onto yours. "I'm not going to fuck you with my cock in a dressing room, but I am going to show you just how you make me feel. Is that okay?"

You nod once more, your voice muffled through the fabric of your panties. He breaches your entrance slowly, the thickness of his finger filling you as your body jolts from the intrusion, your eyes closing in pleasure.

"Look at me, Sugar. Look at what I'm doing to you."

Your eyes shoot open as you see Joel adding another finger into you, the squelch of your wetness against his fingers echoing loudly throughout the room as they slowly pump in and out of your pussy, his fingers crooking inside you slightly as your hips shift against his erection. Joel groans at that, shifting his thigh between your legs. "Lean against me, baby. Watch as I fuck you with my fingers."

You look at yourself in the mirror, the straps of your bralette sliding down your shoulders as Joel fingers you in earnest, tears forming at the corners of your eyes as you wither and tremble against his thigh. Joel pulls the chair he was sitting on earlier towards the both of you, pulling his fingers out of you once more as he plops onto the seat, spreading his legs. He beckons his fingers coated in your slick at you. "Come sit on Daddy's lap like a good little girl."

You stumble inelegantly onto his lap, his hands spreading your legs to rest on his, spreading you out entirely as he gazes at your pussy in the mirror, your ass situated on his jean-covered cock as he starts to grind against you. He pulls your breasts out from the confines of your bralette, the slick of your pussy leaving a trail against your skin as he cups your tits, pinching your nipples as he groans into your neck. "Look at you," he praises, slipping his fingers into your pussy as he begins to finger fuck you into oblivion. You look completely debauched as he thoroughly fucks you, his groans growing louder as he continues to grind his cock against the swell of your ass.

"Sweet innocent little Sugar, playing hooky and getting wrecked by her boss in public", he spits, his fingers increasing in speed as you mewl against the fabric in your mouth. "What would everyone say, huh? Pulling into the parking lot with your brand new Tesla, walking into the office tomorrow morning in your brand new clothes Daddy bought you?" He rubs his thumb against your clit, your body arching back as you cry from overstimulation. "Are you going to take everything that I'm going to give you?" he pulls the fabric from your mouth, a line of saliva trailing it as you breathe harshly, desperately trying to even your breath. "I asked you a question, Sugar. Are you going to take everything I give you?" he rips his fingers out of your pussy as it clenches on nothing, whining from being so violently edged out. He slaps your pussy for good measure, and you swear you could come from the motion alone. "Answer me!" he growls in your ear.

"Yes!" you half-scream. "Joel, it's too much, I can't-"

"Yes, you can, baby. Fuck- keep grinding that ass on my cock, I'm so fucking close", he grips your hip harshly, his fingers digging into the meat of your skin you swear it'll leave a mark. "I can feel you quivering for me, baby, are you gonna come?" He's thrusting, thrusting so harshly against you it's almost to the point of pain, but you're so caught up chasing your release that the pain riles you up, you find yourself gyrating against his hardness as Joel nearly jumps out of his seat in response.

"Joel, what's happening? I feel so wet, you need to stop, I feel like I'm gonna-" You gasp, the pressure building within you so strongly it feels like you're going to implode. Your body moves in sync with his, the groans and shouts of pleasure building, the tears flowing freely down your cheeks. "It's too much, it's too-" You scream, a gush of wetness flooding out of you as Joel fingers you to completion, a look of shock on your face as he grips your hips and comes in his jeans.

"FUCK!" he groans as he shoots his load so violently you swear you can feel the ropes of cum through his jeans as he comes down from his high. You sob into his shoulder, his mouth desperately finding yours as he finally kisses you, his tongue running along the seam of your lips, begging for entrance as he grips the back of your head. You kiss him back in earnest, turning yourself around and straddling his thighs, your bare pussy raw against the fabric of his jeans. "Thank you," he mumbles against your lips, his hands cupping your cheeks, his thumbs wiping your tears away. "You did so good, baby, so fucking good, you came so hard for me you fucking squirted, FUCK! Such a perfect girl, my perfect girl-"

Your eyes widen in shock as you take in the scene before you, the wetness of your slick coating the surface of the dressing room. "Joel, I can't believe I-" You shift on his lap, panicking. "Fuck, Joel, what are we gonna do? I just came all over the dressing room, in Neiman Marcus for fucks sake-"

Joel chuckles softly, gently tucking your hair behind your ears. "Do you realize the power a black Amex wields? Silence. Lenore's commission today will be outrageous; a few stains here and there won't even register."

"But what if it ruined the merchandise? I haven't even tried anything on—"

"No need. Lenore's already taken care of it on the card. I trust her taste." He plants another tender kiss on your lips, retrieving a sleek silver card from his jeans pocket, the unmistakable Tesla logo gleaming.

He hands you the card with a smirk, and your eyes widen in astonishment as you delicately accept it.

"Happy Birthday, Baby."

The Updated List: (Line items 4, 15 & 16 completed this chapter_)

Taglist: @sarcasm-theotherwhitemeat, @gwendibleywrites, @joeldjarin, @brittmb115, @thewiigers,

@auteurdelabre, @quicax3, @casa-boiardi, @amyispxnk, @untamedheart81,

@paleidiot, @bbiophiliaa, @laurrrra, @la-vie-est-une-fleur29 (I apologize if I missed anyone, but if you are looking for any of my fic updates, please feel free to follow my updates blog @chiriwritesstuffnotifs!)

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bvnniz · 4 months

Text

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ : bunny!reader x vox

𝜗𝜚 warnings: NSFW, 18+, cockwarming, slight dd/lg dynamics, reader refers to vox as daddy, usage of vibrator, female reader, she/her pronouns used.

Don’t Get Caught

vox had been on useless business calls all day, he didn’t understand why so many people had to waste his day.

he sighed before loosening his tie “bunny.” he said sternly, he was well aware of the fact you were pretty much always around, even if he couldn’t see you.

that’s when he saw two bunny ears with pink ribbon bows tied to them pop into view from his office door frame before he saw your smiling face. he chuckled, knowing you were in a playful mood and trying not to kill it. “c’mere bun.”

you immediately walked into the room taking your normal spot on vox’s lap “good girl.” he smiled down at you despite his annoyed mood towards his work which caused you to tilt your head

“what’s wrong?” you questioned before wrapping your arms around him. “people are just being idiots per usual little one don’t worry your little bunny head about it.”

“hmph” was all that came out of you as you removed your arms from him and crossed them. “i don’t like when daddy’s upset tho.”

he let out a chuckle “i can’t be upset when i have a little bunny as adorable as you.” you smiled before pressing a kiss onto his screen.

he looked at the time before letting out a sigh “i’m afraid i do gotta send you on your way to go play with your stuffed animals though. i have another call meeting in two minutes.”

you shook your head “you can’t call me here and not give me bunny timeeee.” you whined wrapping your arms back around him. “bunny we can’t you’ve tried before and you can’t stay quiet enough.” you set your head on his shoulder as you tried to think of an idea.

“but it’s just a phone call meeting and they won’t be able to see me and! and! you could just let it be inside me and i promise i won’t move my hips or nothing! please daddy! please! please! please!” he let out a chuckle before thinking about it for a second.

“no moving what-so-ever from you okay? you move even once and i kick you out of here for the day and you have punishment later.” you nodded frantically, your little bunny ears flopping as you did.

you immediately started working on getting his belt off the second he gave you the go ahead, causing a chuckle to leave him. “my eager little baby, can’t even wait for me to be done with work.”

you let out a mhm as you worked on unbuttoning and unzipping his pants, once you finished you put your hands on his shoulders and lifted your hips up so he could help guide you down

he put a hand under your skirt, attempting to take your panties off but being met with you being bare underneath your skirt. “my little whore bunny, walking around with no panties on. really expected daddy to be inside you today hmm?”

you just nodded frantically again as he lowered you down onto his length, letting out a few whimpers as he slid you down the entire way. “you okay little one?” he whispered softly to you as you nodded again putting your head against his shoulder “okay little one no more sounds now though my meetings gonna start in a second.”

and it did, although you were starting to regret making the agreement that you wouldn’t move, only twenty minutes in to his meeting he had gotten bored of the conversation being almost the exact same meeting he had before he called you into his office

but you promised you wouldn’t move, he didn’t promise he wouldn’t make you wanna move. he started playing with your little cotton tail after twenty minutes had passed, a sensitive part of you which he knew almost always made whimpers start to pour out of you.

you looked up at him with pleading eyes as you bit down on your bottom lip to try and hold in your whimpers. you didn’t want it to stop because you felt good but you also didn’t wanna get in trouble for making noise

he looked down and nodded at your pleading eyes, moving his hand off of your tail, although moving them to your bunny ears, playing with the pink bows you always wore on them.

he innocently did that for another twenty minutes, playing with your bows and hair before he had scooted his chair closer to his desk, digging through a desk drawer before pulling a vibrator out.

he’s used the vibrator on you a couple times during meetings, it made almost no noise and he knew when it meant you could be praised from him, you would be quiet

he moved the bottom of his shirt up to your mouth, something you well knew as ‘use this as a gag so you make no noise.’ so you immediately let him put the fabric in your mouth.

he leaned down to your ear, whispering so only you could hear “do not make a noise or you can’t finish for a week little one.” he pulled back waiting for your response to which you just nodded your head

he turned the vibrator on and put it against your clit, he knew he could be mean when he had you cockwarming so he tried to be nice once in a while. especially since you’d been a good girl for him all week. plus he knew you were less likely to break your promise on not moving your hips if you had some sort of stimulation.

it didn’t take long for the bottom of your shirt to be wet from your drool, vox loved to put you on one of the highest settings, especially when you weren’t allowed to make noise. so your shirt was practically soaked from how hard you were trying to keep your moans in

after about ten minutes you had gotten close and you could tell vox’s meeting was gonna end, you tried to hold off, knowing you’d be in trouble for not asking him before finishing.

which is when you finally heard what you wanted to. “i’m off the call now, little one.” he pulled the shirt from between your teeth a moan immediately falling from your lips.

“daddy! please!” you practically yelled, struggling to hold off. “oh my little bunny, we both know you can beg better than that, go ahead beg daddy to let you cum, be daddy’s little good bunny.”

“please daddy! need to cum so badly! please! please! please!” your sentence was barely understandable, your whimpers and moans taking over every time you tried to speak, vox found you pathetic, but he loved when you were acting pathetic for him.

he nodded “go ahead little one, cum on daddy’s cock.” you immediately let go, your back arching and eyes rolling back due to finally getting the release you had been holding onto.

he let the vibrator on you for a few more minutes just to hear the last string of whimpers coming out of you from the overstimulation before taking it off. “i hope you’re not worn out yet little one, you know i can’t be in you this long without fucking you.”

you just smiled up at him, mind blank from your last orgasm. you were in for a loooong night

#hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel #vox x bunny!reader #vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel vox x reader #vox smut #hazbin hotel vox smut

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adventuringblind · 7 months

Text

A Little Lost

Liam Lawson x Reader x Oscar Piastri x Logan Sargeant

Genre: fluff and hurt/comfort

Summary: With her ADHD driving her mind into a whirlwind, she ends up slipping in public and unable to find the one person she needs. Luckily Oscar and Logan are there to help.

Warnings: non-sexual age play, agere/age-regression, panic attacks, implied trauma, non-sexual use of daddy

Notes: I needed this for myself, honestly!! I hope the requester finds comfort in it like I did!

Side note: age-regression is NOT a kink. If you're going to request it, please don't make it a smut request. It gives ya girl mixed signals. AGEPLAY is a kink and has dd/lg dynamics. Please remember this when requesting... I'm begging T_T

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

Everything is overwhelming at the moment. He thoughts are running in a million different directions. The noise and bustle of the paddock is pulling Her every which way.

She needs Liam. Without a shadow of a doubt, she needs him right this second.

Her mental state is dancing between headspaces. Her little self is attempting to break free of the confines she's put the girl in. To young and to alone to be out in this environment.

The alphatauri garage feels so far away. It's an endless walk she's been attempting to make for what feels like hours now. Liam, she just needs to get to him.

Panic rises every time someone bumps into her. She squeaks out a sorry, only to be met with annoyed grunts. She needs her daddy to make it better. No - Liam - she needs Liam.

The catalyst is someone shoving her away and complaining that she should pay more attention. She is paying attention. Her brain just has thirty tabs open, three of them have commercials playing, another is driving her senses wild, and where the heck is her da- Liam?!

The shove sends her tumbling to the ground. Her elbow hits the hard ground on impact. It's bleeding, and she's officially offline.

Her little self takes over, tears welling in her eyes as she hides around the corner and tugs at her hair. A desperate attempt to settle the whirlwind of her thoughts.

She needs her daddy.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Logan and Oscar are animatedly chatting about the race as they walk through the dwindling crowd. Liam had texted about a longer debrief and had asked them to check up on his girlfriend since she wasn't answering her phone.

They'd been an item the last couple of years like Oscar and Logan have. It's an interesting and often tense dynamic. The four of them are all extremely close, but neither of the couples have openly talked about any kind of open relationship.

Oscar and Logan have. It's often a source of interesting fantasies and warm fuzzy feelings. They say nothing, though. Scared of losing their closest friends in the pursuit of something mildly taboo still.

Logan is lost in his thoughts when Oscar stops suddenly. He hushes him and listens intently. It's then that Logan catches the muffled sobs.

They take off in the direction of the crying. Neither of them are ones to let somebody suffer when they can help it.

They turn the corner, and there sits their original target. She curled up with hair in every direction, and her fingers rake through it in a violent manner.

Logan approaches her like she's a wounded animal. He's not at all hurt when she curls farther into her corner.

"Osc, we're gonna need to call Liam."

"Already on it!"

She perks up at hearing Liam's name. Eyes wide and teary, but at least she doesn't look scared of the Logan for the moment. "Daddy? Are callin' daddy?"

Oh. Oh.

She's - how did they put it? - regressed, in age. They talked about it in passing but never elaborated. Logan and Oscar had never bothered to look into it. They were protective over it and they wanted to respect that.

He's regretting that decision just a tad now. He might be more prepared on what to do if he'd bothered to figure out what it is that happens to her.

The obvious thing is that she's vulnerable and scared. "Yeah, we're calling him." He smiles warmly at her. "Can you tell me what happened? Why you're so sad?" He keeps his tone calm to hopefully ease her into a less anxious state.

She untucks herself and shows Logan her red and bleeding elbow. "Was pushed."

It's not a terrible scrape, not one to be worried about, but it is getting on all her clothes. He'll have to ask about the pushing later.

Oscar comes back and sighs in annoyance. "He said another thirty minutes at least of debrief. I feel bad for worrying him now."

Oscar sees where the two are crouched and throws Logan a confused look. "Is everything alright?"

"Well, I think someone needs a band-aid for her elbow and somewhere to wait for daddy." Logan tries to communicate that there is more going on here. Oscar looks between the two, and then his face lights up in some kind realization.

"Lando already left for the day, so my room should be safe. And I know he has crayon band-aids in his room."

She considers the idea. Carefully studying both of their faces for some hint of malicious intent. "Daddy said no strangers."

Logan exaggerates a pondering face. "Are me and Osc strangers? I thought we were best friends!"

She shakes her head yes and moves closer to the American. A reassurance that she does consider him a friend. "More then friend!" She leans up to Logan and motions to lend his ear so she can whisper into it. "Daddy says loves." She giggles, and Logan has to use all his strength not to look dumbfounded at the confession.

Oscar and Logan wrangle her the back way to the McLaren motor home. Their success in going mostly unnoticed has both males breathing in relief as they step into the saftey of Oscar's room.

The Aussie ducks out to grab the band-aid from his teammates' room, and Logan is left to sit with the girl currently looking confused and intrigued. She hesitantly grabs the stuffed koala sitting on the shelf. The one Logan had gotten for him as a joke before they started dating.

"Has name?" Her fingers stroke the soft fluff of the toy.

"I'm not sure. Should we ask Osc when he gets back?" She nods once, then comes and sits on the couch with him. The stuffed koala cradled in her arms like it's the most precious thing she's ever seen.

Logan is still trying to comprehend what she meant earlier. Is it just her small brain misinterpreting something Liam said? Or is this an honest confession that she doesn't currently understand the implications of? He doesn't want to get his hopes up and settles on the second option for now.

Oscar sneaks back in the door and starts unwrapping the bangade. It is, in fact, shaped like a red crayon. Her eyes light up even as he washes the cut and places the band-aid on it.

"There we go, all better now." Oscar smiles at her as she hugs his koala.

"Thank you."

She's completely entranced in the stuffed toy again. Logan taps her on the nose to get her attention. "Did you want to ask Osc your question?"

She makes an 'o' shape with her mouth. "Does koala have a name?" She looks up at him with expectant eyes.

Oscar considers. "Hmmm, I don't think he does. Would you like to give him one?"

She takes careful consideration, weighing all the possible options. "Koko."

"Love it."

"Very creative!"

Her expression changes into something sad. Her eyes once again glassy like before. "Will daddy like?" She curls up in Logans lap with the toy.

"Yeah, he'll love it. Certainly not as much as he loves you."

She hums and closes her eyes. It's adorable and peaceful. "Do you think Liam might let us do this with her again?"

"If he doesn't kill us first. Speaking of, I should let him know where we are."

♡♡♡♡♡

Liam likes to think he's relatively quick. He runs often enough and has good stamina.

This is the fastest he's ever moved in his entire life. He grabs all their stuff with a speed that shocks both Daniel and Yuki.

"What's got you in a hurry, mate?"

"Just eager to see my girl, is all."

Daniel shoots him a wink. "Have a good time!" Liam can only laugh nervously in response. It's certainly not the good time he's thinking of. No, he'd promised her a nice dinner tonight.

Now he's thinking he might have to shift plans. Which - he's not upset about. Liam loves when she's in headspace because it gives him an excuse to do things he wouldn't normally. As in, she's obsessed with cars, and he gets to spend time building the most intricate tracks with household items, blocks, and an ungodly amount of Legos that they have at home. She's always sad when they have to leave them for long periods of time, but he brings a portion with just in case.

He makes for the McLaren garage and is greeted by Oscar out front. It's odd, knowing that their secret is out and yet the Aussie is looking at him affectionately.

They make light conversation while they venture into the building. It feels normal still, nothing to awkward aside from the fact Liam goes on rabbit trails every ten seconds. It's the reason Oscar knows how to handle Lando and his chaotic communication tactics.

Liam mentally slaps himself. Now is not the time to be drooling over his friend's stability and emotional intelligence. He should really just confess. They'd talked about it, they both want it, but that could result in rejection.

Oscar opens the door and slips inside. Liam takes a second to observe the scene in front of him. His girl, happily laying her head in Logan's lap rambling about the koala in her hands.

"Look who I found!" Oscar gestures to Liam. Her head perks up and she scrambles off the couch, slipping to the floor before throwing herself at Liam.

"Hi, love bug." Liam attempts to get on the floor without falling as she clings to him. He fails miserably as the topple over. "Were you good for Oscar and Logan?" She hums something into his chest that he can't decipher.

"She was an angel, honestly." Logan leans forward on the couch. It looks like he's contemplating something, shooting stead looks at Oscar.

With effort, Liam finally gets them situated on the floor. "Do you know what might have triggered this?"

"She scraped her elbow, was that it maybe?"

Liam ponders the suggestion. His eyes find the crayon band-aid that wasn't there the last time he saw her. He sighs, hopefully she was just overwhelmed, and this wasn't an altercation of some kind. "She's struggled with - uh, being shoved around - I guess. You know, home life things."

"Maybe she was shoved and fell which caused the panic attack." Oscar eyes them sadly.

"Well, you two feel up to helping us get out of here?"

♡♡♡♡♡

Oscar doesn't understand how Liam makes this look normal. HAs this been going on under their noses this whole time? If only he could go back in time, rewind a bit and do some research. He and logan could help out if they wanted.

She was falling asleep in the car and still looks like she might clock out in the elevator. Still, Oscar can't help imagining the four of them together, like this.

Liam twirls her around as they walk until she almost falls over. She falls into him, laughing and smiling, the injury from earlier forgotten about.

Their space is comfortable and lived in. The two even slip into a routine, pulling out food for dinner. He whispers something to her, and she skitters off.

They pull chairs out from around the small table. Liam offers them water and something to eat. "So, about... this."

"Which this? The four of us or her specifically?" Logan raises an eyebrow.

"Both."

The girl returns and climbs into Liam's lap clutching a notebook. She flips open to a page and excitedly hands it to Liam to hand to the two across the table.

Oscar isn't sure whether to laugh or melt, so he mixes the two together. The pages are lined with drawings of the four of them. "She's quite the artist."

"You've no idea. Our fridge is covered in artwork." Liam chuckles a bit and wraps his arms around her.

"Told you! More than friends!"

"Do you know what that means, love bug?"

"Three people to cuddle!"

Oscar really does laugh this time. "Well, you're not wrong!" He shoot a look to Logan.

"Count us in." The American smile.

Liam sighs heavily in disappointment. It's a confusing reaction that Oscar wasn't expecting. "She's going to murder me later for not having this talk when she's big."

"Can't be mad if you make me dessert!" A devilish grin spreads across her cheeks.

"Only this once."

"You said that last time."

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intothegenshinworld · 10 months

Text

Fate’s Destiny ~ Chapter 8.5 || The Cavalry Captain

You somehow, not being able to explain it, had fallen into the Genshin world you know oh-so-well. You were no new player and had explored most of the nooks and cranny’s of the world. When you first had woken up in Windrise you wondered; it might be a dream, after all, you were behind your screen usually and now- here? It made no sense, and the world was keen on keeping it that way.

Warnings: Spoilers for main story.

Word count: 2.6k+

Summary chapter 8.5: What happens after you teleport away and land in Liyue? When you're gone, what will Kaeya do?

Auteurs note: It's been over a year. I will start a new taglist, so comment if you want to be notified at the next update!

Thanks to: @m1shapanda for giving me the motivation to continue posting this series :DD you're the mvp <3

↺ PREVIOUS CHAPTER || ↻ NEXT CHAPTER || MASTERLIST

Some time ago, in Mondstadt:

Kaeya watches the healer scan his body with their elemental power. Their hands hover over his chest, emitting a soft glow as they check his lungs. The cavalry captain had insisted he'd be alright many times, yet Eula persisted in having him checked out, hence how he ended up in the med bay within the Favonious headquarters.

Whatever happened on Dragonspine, he knew it had to do with the Creator disappearing. After that blinding flash of light, he felt as if he died, only to painfully resurrect moments later. As good as the healers were, they wouldn’t find the answer to the ache in his chest. That much he was certain of.

An involuntary shudder washes over his body, making the healer pause and look up with concern.

“Don’t worry.” He tries to humor the situation, “you can't make me feel worse than before.”

Almost instantly, Eula smacks the side of his shoulder and sends him a stern glare. “You’ve got some nerve joking in a situation like this. I will have vengeance for that.”

Despite her words, Kaeya knew she cared, probably too much, considering what he’d done behind the Knights’ backs.

“Alright, alright.” He lays back against the pillows of the bed and accepts his fate silently.

There was no use arguing and no use talking about the situation, not with the healer present. Any word about what happened, and chaos would ensue.

Mondstadt had been through enough already.

Kaeya and Eula would both keep their silence until they were alone in the med bay.

The healer continues to carefully examine his state with the help of their vision until they conclude nothing was wrong. At least, nothing physical.

In the end, Kaeya got diagnosed with overexertion of his body and mind, with the simple cure of needing bed rest. It's something he despised more than grape juice or people prying into his private affairs, especially with the situation as confusing and dire with the Creator disappearing.

“Well,” Kaeya breaks the silence in the medbay once the healer had left. He lays comfortably against the pillows as he looks up at his companion, “I did tell you I felt fine.”

Saying that had been a stupid jab at Eula’s worry for him. As the words leave his mouth, he instantly regrets them. Kaeya can’t place why he’s feeling so worked up.

“You might have fooled that healer, but you can’t fool me. I suggest you stop lying and be honest with me, or I won’t be so patient in the future.” Eula’s voice snaps back at him, cold and sharp.

He places a hand on his chest. “If there ever is another time where I’ll be hiding the Creator from my friends, you’ll be the first one to know.”

“Do not tell me you actually believe that nonsense!” Eula gestures her hands angrily in the air, “ ‘The Creator?’ How could you be so foolish?”

He frowns. It seems yet another person failed to sense the aura of the Creator.

Kaeya wonders what caused this troubling phenomenon.

He lets out a deep sigh. Even if he wanted to argue back, there was no way Eula would believe him. That, and the fact that his chest felt as if it had been caving in on itself.

Eula brushes a strand of light blue hair out of her face. She seems to have grown calmer, or perhaps simply tired of the same back and forth arguments. ”Kaeya, you cannot hope that Amber or I will be able to keep this quiet from Jean.”

”I was never planning to.”

Eula raises an eyebrow, urging him to continue.

”She already knows. Or so, I assume. There is no reason why Albedo or I would keep silent after what happened.”

The cavalry captain watches Eula’s expression shift. She first seems to thoroughly inspect him and his own expressions, then, she glances away and mulls about his statement.

When she turns her head to ask him for more, the door is slammed open.

In a fury of rage, a familiar person dressed in red and black enters the rooms like a raging inferno. Red hair frames a face that radiates both coldness and burning hate.

Kaeya had somehow anticipated Diluc, of all people, to come and scold him of all the things he’d done. He just hadn’t expected it to be so soon, and in the Favonious’ headquarters as well.

” You .” Diluc’s voice is filled with resentment.

With the element of surprise on Diluc's side, he’s already at Kaeya’s side before Eula could interject. An angry glare is glued tightly onto his face. If Kaeya hadn’t been laying as pathetically on the flimsy bed, he was sure Diluc would’ve grabbed him, trying to shake some sense into his brain as he did.

“How stupid could you be.” Diluc continues, his tone shifting from anger to disbelief. “Trying to help an imposter?” He lets out a chuckle of disbelief, turning away and back at Kaeya as his mind tries to catch up. “I knew the Knights were incapable, but this truly takes the cake of it all.”

Eula steps forward, her arms crossed as she interjects. “Excuse me?”

“Oh please,” Diluc turns his attention towards the woman. “You’re telling me you weren’t there when the imposter ran away?”

“We were busy fighting. Kaeya–” She whips her head towards the cavalry captain as she speaks, “is the one who caused this situation.”

Diluc seems to agree with that statement, crossing his arms and closing his eyes for a tense moment. Still, he argues her own actions. “Busy fighting each other over capturing the imposter?”

“No we were–” Eula’s words remain stuck in her mouth.

“You were… what…?” Diluc taunts her. He seemed close to bursting into flames out of anger.

It is Kaeya who finishes the sentence for her. “We were busy fighting the other Albedo, though, you seem to know about that already.”

Despite the situation, Kaeya’s voice holds a teasing tone and he seems comfortable laying in the bed as the two remain equally angry as confused.

“You cannot believe me to trust your or Albedo’s words after you so inadequately helped bring yet another disaster to Mondstadt.” Diluc seems done with Kaeya. He speaks the next words to Eula instead, “Care to explain?”

She lets out a chuckle, “I don’t have to explain anything to you, Ragnvindr.”

And because Diluc no longer is affiliated with the Knights of Favonious, she really doesn’t have to. This puts the redhead in a tough situation that leads to him being even more frustrated. Red eyes watch as Eula leaves the medbay with confidence and silent pride.

Diluc utters a few profanities as he follows Eula.

One last glare gets sent into the cavalry capitain’s direction before the door is slammed shut one final time.

Kaeya sits alone on the bed until he passes out.

A few days have passed since the incident on Dragonspine. The place has been closed off for the time being, with the sole exception of Albedo who remains on the snowy mountain, although unlikely in solitude.

Kaeya had carefully approached the topic a few times with Jean and Lisa, but both had kept their lips sealed, and thus Kaeya was left to speculate what had happened with the doppelganger and the missing Creator.

What connection could the two have…?

Moreover, Kaeya had no opportunity to inspect the situation. While Jean was as forgiving as kind, she too had her limits, and she’d do anything to keep Mondstadt safe and running for as long as she was Acting Grand Master.

“Thought we had it bad, but…” The patron in Angel’s Share talks loud enough for the full tavern to hear his story, including Kaeya. “The assassination of the geo archon, or Rex Lapis– whatever , is bound to bring ruin to Liyue Harbor.”

Another person laughs heartily, raising a glass in a toast.. “I’ll drink to that!”

“Mondstadt doesn’t have an Archon either, though.” Laughter falters and Kaeya hears a loud smack echo over the general chatter of the tavern.

“Just drink up, asshole.”

Whatever brought the cavalry captain to Angel’s share, it gave him more information than he could hope for.

A happy coincidence, the first stroke of good luck in days.

“Oh my,” Kaeya grabs the half-empty glass of Death After Noon and turns around in his seat. “How unfortunate must I be to hear the news later than you do.”

With him facing the group of gossiping patrons, he’s able to note that most of them are Fatui. Their masks are all discarded, forgotten at the Goth hotel, no doubt, but they continue to wear their uniform in the tavern. It’s likely that they’d been overworked and drank a few too many glasses of wine or beer and had forgotten their loose lips.

“Hey… isn’t that… ”

Before the group can grow suspicious, Kaeya waltzes over to the table surrounded by Fatui, dragging his own chair with him and inserting himself into the group.

Kaeya smiles, “Now now, I’m just an ordinary costumer.” He puts on his best mask despite the increasing pain in his chest. “Though, I know the best gossip before anyone else. Seems like you were ahead of me this time.”

One of the more inebriated Fatui members laughs loudly, his belly shaking as he does. “You hear that! This guy thinks he’s something, huh?”

“Shut up, idiot!”

“Nu-uh. You’ve been ruining our fun ever since we started drinking. If you’re gonna be such an uptight prick, leave .”

“Whatever. It’s your funeral.”

Tension rises amongst the Fatui, and it’s clear that not everyone has forgotten to keep their mouths shut. Kaeya had to tread lightly if he wanted to prevent causing harm to the diplomatic alliance of Snezhnaya and Mondstadt. But luck seemed to be on his side, and the Fatui member that previously tried to silence the group stood up and left.

Probably the best thing they could do, given their superiors.

Kaeya was only half sorry for the punishment these Fatui would get once he’d gather the intel and share it with Jean.

“How unfortunate.” Kaeya smiles as brightly as he can, “Some people just can’t seem to loosen up.”

The group agrees with him, and he’s considered one of them by the time he gives them a free round of drinks. Kaeya no longer has to put in any effort to retrieve the information as it’s handed to him on a silver platter.

“So,” one Fatuus stares at another, “He was just killed?”

“Fell straight out of the sky. Believe me, Alexey swore to the Tsaritsa he saw it with ‘is own eyes.”

A fatuus shoves the other nearly out of his seat, “You’re lying. You can’t just kill an Archon. Don’t be stupid.”

“But if it’s—”

“You think…”

There’s a brief silence after the murmurs, and Kaeya instinctively leans closer. The Fatui look at each other and then hang their heads low. The cheerful atmosphere from before has instantly dissipated.

The Fatui seemed to have realized that their superiors might have been involved, something that doesn't seem too far-fetched in Kaeya's eyes.

The cavalry captain makes up his mind and leaves whatever is left of his Death After Noon on the table, making a half-hearted excuse to leave so he can report back to Jean.

Before going to the headquarters, Kaeya stops and thinks that the death of the geo Archon might be too far-fetched to be true. However, with the recent descent of the Creator and their defect aura, nothing seemed ordinary anymore. For the small chance the intel to be true, he’d have to try.

So, he shared everything with Jean. If he were to be caught keeping any information from her at this point, he’d be digging his own grave. And for the slim chance of the news being true, he’d bring in extremely valuable information.

Jean crosses her legs. “We know.”

“You know?” Kaeya blinks.

He’s stunned.

The Acting Grand Master simply smiles and tells him not to worry, but that only causes the pain in his chest to rise.

Lisa chimes in. “Say, what were you doing in Angel’s share during work hours?”

Drinking to chase away the feeling of impending doom,

“Gathering intel, as you heard.”

Kaeya leans back into the chair across Jean’s. Certainly doing nothing wasn’t good for Mondstadt either. Why would Jean choose to ignore the death of Liyue’s Archon, especially if she confirmed the news to be true?

The mask of confidence falters and Kaeya’s voice turns to something unrecognizable to himself, “I don’t think this is good.”

“What isn’t?” Jean shares a quick look with Lisa before returning her gaze to Kaeya.

“Doing nothing.” He sighs and puts his hands on the desk, leaning closer. “I know you don’t believe me, really , I don’t blame you.” He hesitates, “But now with the death of Rex Lapis?”

Kaeya puts his weight on one armrest, leaning with his arm over to the side. He thinks about all the stupid ways he can put this, a way to see the Creator again, but the situation continues to grow more and more complex.

He can no longer act alone.

“Jean,” Lisa’s voice interrupts the silence. “Perhaps it would be time to send a diplomat to assess the situation in Liyue.”

Kaeya can’t believe his ears. Was he hearing this correctly?

She continues, “The situation is growing beyond our control and it’d be best to confront this problem before rumors can spiral and cause panic.”

The cavalry captain turns his head from Lisa to Jean. Whatever prompted the librarian to come to his aid, he’d be reaping the benefits.

“Oh my,” he starts slickly, ”That does seem like a good idea. After all, if the Fatui already knows, we should have all the juicy details as well.”

Jean sighs, she rubs her thumb between her eyebrows in a helpless way. After a moment, she looks up again.

Her voice sounds exhausted, ”So, who do you suggest?”

Lisa chuckles, ”Without any cavalry, our captain here might have the most free time on his hands. Especially if he’s been caught drinking in Angel’s share during work hours.”

A small jab in his direction, but Kaeya takes it as a compliment. ”Excellent idea, Lisa.”

While he shares an equally mischievous glance with the librarian, he hears Jean ruffle some papers. ”Okay–”

Kaeya smiles-

” –but only if you take Diluc with you. ”

Kaeya´s expression darkens.

”Diluc, really?” he suppresses the disappointment in his voice.

”He was the one who told me about Liyue’s predicament, and he is more than capable of handling situations like these.”

If Diluc had heard of the incident before Kaeya, it was most likely due to a city lockdown, which might have delayed his business between Dawn Winery and the partners he had in Liyue. This meant Diluc would be going to Liyue regardless of this conversation, and considering Jean's adamant decision, going with Diluc would be better than not going at all.

”...fine.”

Jean seems to relax and sends him a warm smile. ”I’ll be expecting you to act as the Mondstadt’s diplomat, keep that in mind. Report to me if you find anything noteworthy.”

Kaeya stands up from his seat. ”You know I won’t disappoint, Acting Grand Master.”

When the door closes shut behind Kaeya, Lisa moves to sit in the now vacant chair across Jean. She sends her a warm smile, which fails to bring ease to the Acting Grand Master. Jean throws her head into her hands in a desperate attempt to hide her stress.

“Lisa.” The blonde lifts her head, “Did you really think it was wise to send him? Shouldn’t we keep this between the four of us?”

The librarian leans back into the chair, crossing her legs comfortably once she’s settled, and calmly sighing. “If he stays here, he’ll pry until he figures it out.” Lisa turns a finger in the air. “And I do believe Diluc would keep a close eye on him for us.”

“Still…”

“Don’t worry so much,” Lisa places her hand over Jean's. “We’ll figure out what’s going on.”

#sagau #sagau x reader #sagau kaeya #isegau #genshin x reader #kaeya #kaeya genshin impact #bro i forgot how to tag mb

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aceof-stars · 3 months

Text

Narumitsu/Wrightworth Fic Recs! (Part 1, Multi Chapter)

I'm finally cleaning out my tabs and sorting through all the fanfics I've read so I thought tumblr would be the best place to keep my favorite fics :)

This post will contain only multi-chapter fics, completed fics will be listed first and then uncompleted ones. Assume it's a wrightworth fic unless I specify otherwise. I will also be subjecting you all to the way I tag/organize the fanfics I read. I'll try to keep spoilers out of my tags, but if you want to go in blind just click the link.

I will tag the author if I know their tumblr <3

Anyways, Enjoy!!

Canon Compliant, Mostly

A Long Way To Fall by Prospectkiss aka @prospectkiss

Era: OG Trilogy | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Casefic, Phoenix Gets Kidnapped, Includes Smut

The very first wrightworth fic I read!! <3

Paper Hearts by Prospectkiss aka @prospectkiss

Era: DD/SOJ/Post-Canon | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Angst, Reunion

So Soft that it h u r t s me

Turnabout Forgotten by Nali_li

Era: OG Trilogy | Relationship? Established Relationship & Confession | Plot Stuff: Phoenix has Amnesia, Pining While In a Relationship

res ipsa loquitur (the thing itself speaks) by griffonage

Era: DD/SOJ/Post-Canon | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Phoenix Didn't Know They Were Dating, Miscommunication (but it's funny)

pari delicto, pari passu (equal fault, equal footing) by griffonage

Era: DD/SOJ/Post-Canon | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Phoenix Didn't Know They Were Dating, Miscommunication (but it's funny)

Yeah this is very similar to the previous one but they're both very good

Five Times Miles Found Phoenix Infuriatingly Attractive and One Time Phoenix Threw It Right Back at Him by 3musketears

Era: Disbarment/AJ | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession → Established Relationship | Plot Stuff: Aspec Miles Edgeworth Suffers™️

Disbarment tends to be a really sad era to write in but this one isn't soul-crushing

to drink, and live, what has destroyed some men by multifandom_fanfic_writer

Era: Multiple (Pre-DL-6, Disbarment/AJ, DD/SOJ/Post-Canon) | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Phoenix is Jealous of Miles' Admirers, Miles Edgeworth Rejects Everyone Except Phoenix

Guilty As Charged by JustNerdyThings

Era: DD/SOJ/Post-Canon | Relationship? Established Relationship | Plot Stuff: AJ Trilogy Characters Try Matchmaking-- Phoenix & Miles Don't Need It Actually, POV Outsider, Miscommunication (but it's funny)

A Night You'll Never Regret by MaudMoon (Idle_Wanderings) aka @maud-moon

Era: DD/SOJ/Post-Canon | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession | Plot Stuff: Phoenix & Miles Get Impulsively Married, Drunken Shenanigans, Temporary Amnesia, Communication!, Includes Smut

One of my favorite Post-Canon wrightworth fics, Phoenix and Miles are characterized so well <3

Canon Retellings/Canon Divergence

Reprieve by Almarna aka @almarnatiaam

Era: Pre-Canon (Bratfeen) | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession → Established Relationship → Breakup → Getting Back Together | Plot Stuff: Bratworth & Feenie are Roommates, First Game Retelling

Don't Lawyers Feel Love Too? by JustNerdyThings

Era: Pre-Canon (Bratfeen), Legally Blonde AU | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession → Established Relationship | Plot Stuff: Bratworth is Feenie's Study Partner, Turnabout Goodbyes Retelling

What Are Roommates For Anyways by daggar

Era: Pre-Canon (Bratfeen) | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession → Established Relationship | Plot Stuff: Bratworth is Feenie's Roommate, Bratworth Tries to Have a Corruption Arc & Feenie Doesn't Let Him, Bratworth's Accelerated Redemption, Turnabout Memories Retelling

This one is similar to the last but it's angstier and involves more case/plot elements

UNFINISHED

A Demon's Justice by Evelinessa aka @evelinessa

Era: OG Trilogy (PW:AA) | Relationship? Pre-Relationship | Plot Stuff: Phoenix Loses Turnabout Sisters, Edgeworth's Delayed Redemption, Turnabout Sisters Retelling, Turnabout Goodbyes Retelling

pain, pain, so much pain please save me (jk I love it)

Feline Any Better? by Dreamnorn

Era: Pre-Canon (Bratfeen) | Relationship? Pre-Relationship | Plot Stuff: Bratworth's Accelerated Redemption, Bratworth Becomes a Cat and Gets Closer to Phoenix, Phoenix Wright Angst Train

Turnabout Transposed by NeeineArts

Era: No-DL-6 AU | Relationship? Established Relationship (um it's complicated) | Plot: Canon Edgeworth Travels to No DL-6 Universe, Crossing Timelines, Casefic

Alternate Universe

I Spy by zombiekittiez

Era: Spy AU | Relationship? Established Relationship → Estrangement → Getting Back Together | Plot Stuff: Phoenix & Miles Work For Opposing Sides, Secret Identities

Augh pain, what if I want wrightworth to be happy is that too much to ask for

The Return of Glory by MaudMoon (Idle_Wanderings) aka @maud-moon

Era: Hogwarts AU | Relationship? Pre-Relationship → Confession → Established Relationship | Plot Stuff: Phoenix & Miles are Rivals At First, Exposing von Karma, Found Family Working Together

AUTHOR DOES NOT SUPPORT JK ROWLING!! I REPEAT, AUTHOR DOES NOT SUPPORT JK ROWLING. Phoenix and Maya are BOTH trans here

HP worldbuidling elements are actually incorporated so well into Ace Attorney plot points

#ace attorney #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #narumitsu #wrightworth #mitsunaru #worthwright #fanfic #fanfiction #archive of our own #fanfic recs #fic rec #fanfiction recommendation

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gluion · 1 year

Text

somebody ➵ ji changmin

you needed somebody to give you what you crave. will you allow changmin to be that for you?

requested by @sungbeam for the song "somebody" by keshi

genre/warnings ➵ smut, afab reader, porn no plot, petnames (baby), slight dom!changmin, changmin is trying to prove to you that you're all he needs, reader is very much insistent on denying that they need him, no explicit consent was used (consent is sexy btw!), use of your vibrator (though he doesn't let you cum with it), hickeys, making out, nipple play, unprotected sex (yes there is p in v action! please wrap it up), dirty talk, cum eating (reader's end), no aftercare since the ending is kind of abrupt, not edited because i kind of hate rereading the smut i write... apologies

word count ➵ 3.2k words

taglist ➵ @deoboyznet @kflixnet @blankjournal @winterchimez @vernyangel

a/n ➵ surprise! fulfilling my first request since i first opened it!! i hope you enjoy it beam!! i know i said to expect it at the end of this week but smth possessed me... i'm not sure if it's great because i'm also getting used to writing smut </3 but i still hope you enjoy it!! let me know your thoughts :DD for the other readers: if you enjoyed this, always make sure to reblog (even if it’s on your tbr </3)!

want to be part of my taglist? send me an ask! want to request? check out my guidelines! masterlist

They say that any decisions made after 2:00 a.m. are ones made to set you up for the worse. All rational thought seems to leave someone’s brain when the clock’s hand strikes that number. And all events that occur after that time are ones people tend to regret, rethinking their choices and the situation they’re placed in as soon as the next day comes.

You are well aware of the curse. Your friends have been victims of the supposed curse, making choices that will give them another story that will gather laughs or scowls from others. And you end up becoming the one person your friends call before they make these stupid choices—the one person who has to knock sense into your friends whether they may be in an intoxicated state or not.

But it’s embarrassing enough that while you usually take the position of knocking some sense around this time of the night, you find yourself in the same position your friends seem to always be in—lips interlocked with the guy you should have no connection with.

The smell of him has your brain turning into putty. This could all be due to the later hours of the day; you’re probably only making these impulsive decisions because you’re deprived of sleep. But being in this hazy state intensifies how his hands feel as they venture all over you.

As soon as his lips leave yours, he notices how insistent you are in keeping your eyes closed. The idea of you refusing to meet eyes with him out of pure shame has him chuckling. “Come on, now. There’s no need to be shy,” he mumbles before letting his lips move to the side of your neck. His hands find their place on your hips, holding you against your bedroom door.

You feel the way he sucks on the skin, and it’s one you can never find the right words to describe how it makes you feel. Call it blissful, pleasurable, or gratifying—all you know is that it’s sinful to feel all this just because of him.

“I’m sure that there’s a reason why you let me in your dorm,” he says as he stops littering your neck with hickeys. As you feel his breath fan over the wet marks, you cannot help but shudder at the sensation. “I’m sure I made it clear about what I wanted from you since you saw me standing by your door.”

You shake your head. “No, I didn’t.” Your attempt to defend your pride is almost pathetic—one that even has you cringing at the sound of it. In no way did it sound convincing but you needed to do anything and everything to protect your ego.

A chuckle leaves his mouth. And the hands that held you against your door maneuvered you away from it. Your eyes snap open, finally taking sight of the man who seems to know what you crave. The smirk on his lips has your blood boiling. “That’s not true.” And before you could protest, his lips find their place on yours.

The way he tugs on your bottom lip has your knees going weak, providing him an advantage to knock you down to your bed—the same one where you find yourself dreaming about him marking you up in every spot possible. Between you and this bed held secrets you were afraid to ever admit to anyone.

Even in the hours you would never allow Changmin to touch you as you were capable of making rational decisions, thoughts of him occupied every corner of your mind—from the way he would leave your lips all bruised from the way he kisses you all the way to how he had you moaning his name into the crook of his neck while he whispered nothing but profanities and dirty secrets that had you creaming around him.

As you two lay down on your bed, his hands tugged on the hem of your shirt. He parts away from you, leaving you both breathless. “Don’t forget that I know all about you,” he points out before another smirk shows up on his face.

Before you know it, he removes your shirt off of you, your bare chest now exposed to him. And when one of his hands finds its place on your boobs, you cannot help but whine at the way he gropes you, fingers playing with your nubs.

“I never forget, baby.” The way he whispers the pet name has you wanting to kick him out. He shouldn’t call you that, ever, for it should only be reserved for ones you’re in a relationship with. And in no way are you and him together. But god, these hours hold power over you—you never tell him to stop.

His hands continue to fondle your chest and you bite on your bottom lip to hold back any moan—any sound—from leaving you. But you cannot help but let your eyes flutter close. If Changmin didn’t know your body better than you do, maybe then it would be easier to reject all his offers.

“There’s no need to hold back those pretty sounds of yours. I know all of it, remember?” He leaves a kiss on the space of your cheek that’s close to your ear. “But I have a question for you: Were you expecting to meet with someone else by your door?”

When you shake your head, he chuckles against your ear. “I don’t believe you.” Your eyes snap open at his claim. He moves away from the side of your face so that he can look directly at you.

“Something tells me that you were trying to ring up your other hookups. From the way you were dressed up when you answered the door,” his face gets close to yours so that your noses touch. And with his breath fanning so closely over your mouth, you cannot help but hold yourself from breathing. “It’s almost like you wanted someone to fuck you then and there.” The way he whispers such profanities has you sucking in your breath.

You really weren’t expecting to meet with anyone—not even when Lee Juyeon from your general mathematics class messaged you an hour ago. Although his message did say that he was interested in doing some “homework” with you, you were capable of reading between the lines after all the instances you two couldn’t help but make out.

But the reality is that you two never went further than groping each other—you were too preoccupied with thoughts of the man who continues to pleasure you now.

“I really wasn’t going to meet with anyone,” you admit as your eyes almost close from exhaustion and desperation. “I was going to go to sleep until you barged into my dorm.”

Changmin cannot help but laugh. As he sits up with his legs caging you down, he removes his shirt. As soon as he flings his shirt to the side, he allows his chest to be pressed up against yours. You want to gasp at how nice it is to have his skin on yours, but you do your best to make sure your facial expression never changes.

He lets his hand reach out to your face, cupping your jaw so that you keep your eyes on him. And the question that leaves his lips makes you want to kick him out of your dorm. “Were you really going to go sleep or use that purple vibrator of yours until you passed out?” And you should’ve pushed him off of you—tell him to get out so that you could allow yourself to sleep. But when you try to look away from him, that’s when he knew he had you right where he needed you—you had him right where you shouldn’t need him.

He chuckles and says, “Is that why you let me walk into your dorm? Is that vibrator of yours not enough?” His hand leaves your face before he sits up once more, reaching out for your bedside drawer.

“No, it’s more than enough,” you argue back, trying hard to not have your hands all over his chest—over his arms, for that matter. But when he’s at eye-level with you once more, you notice the smirk that seems to be etched on his face. And before you know it, he raises your toy so that you can see it. As soon as you gulp at the sight of it, that’s when Changmin knew that his assumptions were right.

Before you can say anything, he pulls your shorts down with one hand, bringing your panties along. Your eyes cannot help but trail to his arm all the way down to his hand that successfully holds your bottoms all crumpled up. And when he examines the garments, he notices a wet patch on your underwear that was formed all from the way he touched you.

He tongues the inside of his cheek as he looks back and forth between the garment and you. As soon as he flings away your bottoms to the side, he uses that same hand to reach down to the area where you shouldn’t need him. But as soon as his fingers make contact with your folds, you cannot help but arch your back in instinct. It’s embarrassing to want him carnally.

Changmin’s fingers prod their way into your pussy. The way you bite on your bottom lip to hold back any moans is what has him chuckling. “There’s no need to hold back. I’ll give it all to you.” His fingers trail up and down, gathering your slick. And now, you were sure you weren’t exhausted, for all the sensations you were feeling were enough to keep you awake until you got what you craved.

Once his fingers leave your pussy, you bite the inside of your cheek so that a whine never leaves you. But as you watch his slick-coated fingers rubbing over your toy, you almost want to pass out from what can be expected next. As he clicks on a button, the toy begins to emit a buzzing sound, vibrating in his hand.

“Let’s see if this toy can really make you cum.”

And before you know it, the toy rests right at your entrance. You let your hands reach to your scalp, holding onto your hair so that you don’t touch him. You wanted to grab your vibrator off his hands just to show him where you needed it to be, but you would never give him the pleasure of watching you get off. And yet, it’s almost as if he reads your thoughts for he brings it upwards, meeting your clit.

The sudden vibration on your nub has you sucking your breath in, your head lolling backward. With how hard you’re biting on your lip, you’re positive that a wound has started to form. “Why don’t you moan for me? We both know you want to.” Changmin’s words have you shaking your head. You don’t want to give him the satisfaction. But with how good your toy feels on your clit, you almost find yourself giving into him—just almost.

As you shake your head with your eyes closed, you hear the way he hums. And before you know it, your vibrator goes at a faster speed. Your face scrunches up in pleasure. Now, all you want to do is chase your high until you can finally cum.

“Look at you, all desperate for me.” His words almost sound like he’s making fun of you. But when you let your eyes slowly flutter to look at him, you notice how in awe he is with how you try to chase the feeling. You notice how his eyes trail down from your torso all the way to where the vibrator is found. “Is this how you look like when you fuck yourself until you pass out? God, I need to see you more like this.”

And you shake your head, eyes closing as you try to regulate your breathing. But when his free hand reaches your nipples, you almost pass out. The combined sensations have you breathing heavily, your brain reaching territories of absolutely no rational thought. Now, all you want is for him to be inside you.

The vibration on your clit has you moving your bottom up, aiming to get anything inside you. Somehow, Changmin knew that all the way from how your body was writhing in desperation. And you expect him to set your vibrator to a higher setting or to have his fingers shoved up in your pussy. But when your toy suddenly stops buzzing, your eyes open to only see him smirking.

He sets your vibrator aside before he sits up, his hand leaving your chest. “I’m not letting your first time cumming tonight be from your toy.” He unbuttons his pants as he stares you down. You’re still breathing heavily from all the sensations, but his eyes on you have you wanting to hide away in shame. “There’s no need to hide it, baby. I’ll be the one to satisfy you—to please you.”

As soon as he discards his pants, he lets himself lean forward so that his face is close to yours. With one arm resting on the space near the side of your face, the distance between you two is almost nonexistent—lips so close to touching once more.

“On the nights you need someone to please you, I’ll make sure to be that person for you,” he says as he holds his cock in his hands, his tip meeting your folds as it gathers your slick. “I’ll become that somebody for you—only if you let me.” And his whisper has all rational thought leaving your mind for you cannot help but wrap your arms around his neck, bringing his lips to yours.

The way his tongue prods against the same of your lips has you parting your mouth slightly open, letting his tongue play with yours. The more he kisses you, the more lightheaded you feel. It almost feels like minutes since you initiated this kiss, and he still has yet to enter you. As soon as you part away from him, you’re about to scold him.

But before you can do so, his cock slowly enters you. The air gets knocked out of your lungs as he slowly enters you little by little, and the way you hold your breath has him chuckling. He lets his face snuggle to the crook of your neck as he leaves kisses all over the space. “Let me all that you need,” he mumbles against your skin. “I know all that you need, so why don’t you let me become that somebody for you?”

And you want to tell him that he’s wrong. You can find someone else who can learn all about what you want—all that you need. But deep down, you know how no one can make you crave something so carnally like he does; no one is capable to have your brain turning into putty just from how they touch you, and; no one can fuck you like he can.

So as soon as you find yourself slightly nodding, he is aware that you have completely allowed him to be the body that you will use—the body that will give you all that you need. And just like that, he thrusts into you. The moans now spill out of your mouth as you let your fingers scratch his back. His cock glides against your ways in a way that your vibrator never will.

“Oh god,” you blubber out accidentally. You can’t believe you let such words leave your mouth for they hold the power to feed his ego. You feel the way he smiles against your neck.

Once his lips move away from your neck, he moves his face so that it hovers over yours. “The way you moan for me is pretty. Do you moan like this for anyone else?”

You stare right at him. “Y-yes.” It’s your attempt to prevent his ego from inflating—to stop him from ever thinking how much of an effect on you. But he sees right through your lie, the smile now bigger on his lips.

“Okay,” he says. “Then I’ll make sure that you never go back to your other fucks.” And just like that, he continues to thrust into you at a faster rate. You throw your head back as more moans spill out of you. And when his tip started to meet the spot that had your toes curling, that’s when you knew you were so close to finally breaking.

With the way you start to clench on him, he looks down to where his length gets lost in your folds. “God, you’re gripping on my cock so tight. You’re going to cum already? But we’ve only just started.” You let your eyes meet his face, and you notice that his eyes are about to flutter close. Just like you, he was getting close to cumming as well.

His thrusts get sloppier. “Don’t worry about who you’re fucking anymore.” You feel yourself teetering on the edge of release. All you needed was something more. And before you can think of what you needed to finally push you to cum, you feel his fingers meet your clit, rubbing it in circles.

You gasp at the sensation. The way his cock enters you all while his fingers rub on the nub of nerves is enough to let you see white. “Cum for me.” And as he chants that set of words, you find yourself creaming all over him. The moan you let out as you cum all over him is sinful. With your face scrunched up in pleasure, he cannot help but feel himself about to orgasm.

Despite how tight your pussy grips his cock, he manages to find a way to move his dick away. Your eyes flutter open to see the way he grips his dick, rubbing it up and down as he tries to enter the same zone you’re in. As you watch the way his hand moves, you cannot help but admire the sight of him getting lost in pleasure—eyes closed as he focuses on the sensation. And before you know it, cum spills out of him as he moans, his release painting your chest.

His free hand rests on your bed as he continues to pump his cock, riding out the orgasm. Once he finished, you notice how his breathing is just as heavy as yours. His eyes flutter open to meet with yours. Once his hand stops holding his length, you notice that his fingers trail to your chest as they gather some of his release. And without a second thought, you let your lips part.

You notice the way his eyes widen at your willingness. Even without his conviction, you were willing to eat his release up. With that, his fingers coated in cum slips into your mouth. And he feels the way your tongue licks his digits up.

Just from the way you lick his cum off his fingers, he feels himself getting lightheaded and his cock growing hard once more. And before you know it, his digits leave your mouth. “Are you ready for round two?”

#zzoguri works #deoboyznet #kflixnet #bjnet #k-labels #ji changmin #the boyz #the boyz x reader #ji changmin x reader #ji changmin smut #the boyz smut #the boyz imagines #ji changmin imagines

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randomfoggytiger · 9 months

Text

The X-Files: Mulder and Vulnerability

(Dedicated to @dd-is-my-guiltypleasure~. Merry Christmas!)

I've made a post about Mulder's emotional journey before (post here, it's a good read) but not about the broader scope of his vulnerabilities in past and present relationships.

So! Let's start at the very beginning-- after all, it's the very best place to start.

Mulder's Emotional Expression: Ground Zero

The Pilot gives us a clue of Mulder's emotional barometer: within thirty minutes we've learned that his nature is naturally trusting despite distrusting everyone, that he is tactile and touch-starved, and that he is shocked anyone would seek or could derive comfort from him during a crisis.

Mulder strings Scully along for the first twenty-five minutes of the episode before she runs to his room, terrified of a mosquito bite, and promptly clings to him in a mixture of ebbing fear and relief. As noted in my other post, Mulder is taken aback-- shaking his head in confusion and awkwardly patting her on the shoulder, following her with his eyes then his feet to a set of chairs-- before handing over his motel bed and heartbreaking backstory. From then on out, his hand gravitates to her back; and he factors her naturally into his rhythms, e.g. running after her to share his awe at the experience in the woods.

This incident locks in Mulder's investment very early on; and the events of the next two episodes-- rescuing him from the base in Deep Throat and taking his side on a man-monster case in Squeeze-- solidifies that quickset bond even further.

His reliance on Scully shifts after her support in Conduit, exposing itself in (even more) blatantly territorial jealousy in The Jersey Devil, fervent appeal in Ice, dedicated determination in Lazarus, and cloistered, singular trust in E.B.E. and Tooms.

But a little interesting thing happens in both Conduit and Roland that singles them out from the rest of Season 1: Mulder is brought to the brink of tears, breaking down to himself in a church and almost letting them fall later in Roland's care home.

As we see often throughout the series, Mulder rarely gives in to his emotions, and (almost) never completely. While this could be a symptom of being raised in the 60s and 70s with very poor parental support after his sister's abduction, it's even more enlightening-- and distressing-- to notate when Mulder cries and why he stops.

Mulder cries in Conduit because no one is there to check his tears; Mulder cries in Roland because Roland is less conscious of societal expectations and responds more openly to Mulder's honest fears. And Roland is the only person Mulder almost cries in front of for years: during Scully's abduction and return and near-death, he sought the solitude of his apartment; during his "sister's" return and death, he tried to keep his "weakness" from Scully and his father; even during his father's apology and murder, he put his pain aside and focused on revenge. It's not until Herrenvolk that Mulder finally cries in front of Scully, and only briefly; and after that, not for another three years.

And Mulder's reactions to his "slip ups" are the death knell to any other possible speculation. David Duchovny nailed the self-rebuking, ashamed, almost fearful look Mulder gives himself and his surroundings whenever his sobs become loud or noticeable: ashamed, afraid he'll get caught, certain he'll be rebuked for his weakness.

So, what is the deciding factor between his tears in solitude and his open weeping? Simply put: activated childhood guilt.

He "failed" in End Game, and chokes on his regret and tears while being torn down by his father. He "failed" in Anasazi, and his father dies, gurgling on blood and begging for forgiveness. He "failed" in Oubliette, and cries publicly over Lucy Householder's drowned body. He "failed" in Herrenvolk, and sobs on Scully's shoulder after turning her for immediate and necessary comfort. He "failed" in Paper Hearts, and never lets the tears spill over. He "failed" in Gethsemane and Redux II, and stifles his agony in pillows and shame. He "failed" in Kitsunegari, and almost crumbles on the floor next to his "partner." He "failed" in Sein und Zeit, and finally breaks under the irreparability of his mother's death.

Further, the separate pains that afflict Mulder might seem similar-- assigning guilt and blame to himself for a loved one's death-- but they are very different: Scully's abduction, return, near death, and cancer, as well as his father's appeal and sudden murder, were a result of his work. Yes, those haunt him; but in maturer ways, weighing-in motives other than his own. However, the continual roller coaster of Samanthas waltzing in and out of his life and his mother's two deathbeds are a direct result of his "failure" to save his little sister; and the internal wounds he and his mother carry (until her death and his closure) touch the very wick of his soul, burning away the barriers he's erected to maintain what little peace he clings to.

The Samantha Angle

Samantha is the quickest way to squeeze tears from Mulder.

As a child, Mulder was incredibly expressive person, jumping around in glee, stomping on his Spock ear, and yelling happily while running circles around his sister (Dreamland II); and that was still evident during his prepubescent years (Demons and Little Green Men.)

But he stopped emoting after Samantha's abduction, just as his father's affection seemed to fade (Bill Mulder filming his family in Dreamland II contrasted to his behavior in Season 2) and his mother's gregarious attention became restrained (Tena in Dreamland II versus Tena the rest of the series.) The loss of his sister changed the dynamics of the Mulder household; and, like Mulder said in the Pilot, they never recovered. For him, emotional guarding became all-important, as he now had to answer to an unforgiving father and nursemaid his grieving mother (see post here and here.)

Even after Scully ran to Mulder for safety and comfort (i.e. Pilot, Irresistible, and Milagro), he never quid pro quo'd until Tena "died"-- both times-- and there was no optimistic hope for Samantha's return left to cling to.

Conduit is the first time Mulder sheds tears-- the most unrestrained moment early on in the series-- wallowing in grief over the failure of this case and its similarities to his sister's story.

End Game destroys the second chance of Colony; and Mulder barely holds himself together as his father let him take all the blame for the "death" of his sister.

Anasazi is the second time Mulder loses emotional control; but it's later tempered by the revelation of his father's work, weakening and breaking this particular guilty tie to Samantha.

Oubliette is the first of two nightmarish cases relating to Samantha; and, despite his best efforts, Lucy Householder dies. Her death is the one and only time that Mulder sheds tears in public where everyone could see.

Talitha Cumi and Herrenvolk gives Mulder a cure for Tena and third chance with his sister (or another clone), then yanks both of them away. Too raw to reinforce his safeguards, he cries for Tena at her bedside and again-- and for the first time-- on Scully's shoulder. (However, the violent passion of Conduit has to wait for Sein und Zeit to publicly exhibit.)

Paper Hearts: Mulder walks through the motions of his coping skills-- minimization and avoidance-- shutting his emotions away with the last cloth heart.

Demons and Redux II shows the depths of Mulder's unfettered pain, torment, and anguish... but even still, he won't allow himself to completely give way, either for his "memories" or another lost Samantha. (It's easy to lump his cries at Scully's bedside in the same vein as the fault he feels for Samantha; but as mentioned above-- and will be touched on again soon-- they are very separate griefs.)

Sein und Zeit is the end-all-be-all for Mulder: he cracks, resolve crumbling; and years of repressed emotions spill out messily after Tena Mulder's suicide. That she hadn't told him, that she hadn't had the faith in him to give her answers before her death, that she had left him to clean up the mess he'd "wrecked" in her life without the consolation of a last, loving goodbye destroyed him; and he finally falls apart in Scully's arms, noisy and tearful and broken. (And still up the next morning, putting his grief aside to help another family who lost their own little girl.)

But it's not just about Samantha anymore, is it? The guilt about "failing" her spread to every area of his life, consuming the relationship with his mother, his father, and to a lesser degree his friends, partners, and even Scully. It's an aspect of his vulnerability that was always on the surface, able to be easily twisted, manipulated, or extorted by sundry nefarious characters.

Mulder's Past Relationships: Then and Again

Mulder's past friendships and relationships bubble up from his past here and there, giving us ample opportunity to see how to exploit that vulnerability without directly relating to his childhood trauma.

Season 1 Mulder is more likely to reciprocate disdain with his adversaries than forge new connections; but that soft underbelly of his shown briefly in the Pilot and Conduit is revealed and targeted when ex-best buddy Jerry Lamana, ex-girlfriend Pheobe Green, and former partner and mentor Reggie Perdue filter back into his life. Even the manifestation of his childhood aspirations and dreams ends up a victim to the paranormal, inflicting yet another lash from the whip of distorted childhood nostalgia.

Jerry Lamana swoops in from the past in Ghost in the Machine, surprising Mulder with a hug and a backstab for old times' sake. Yet, despite his spite and sticky-finger ways, Jerry worms his way into his old partner's sympathy by hitting on that old, old trigger button: "Let's face it: I was tagging along. How would you know, Mulder? You were too busy dazzling them up there on the highwire."

Lieutenant Colonel Marcus Belt, Mulder's childhood hero in the flesh, ultimately betrays and disappoints his admirer as well as his crew and mission at large. And while Mulder is right-- that the man was being compelled to do something almost outside his will-- he clings too much to Belt's speech and less to the facts at hand: the colonel's appeal to Mulder's humanity won him more grace over his actions than he might justly deserve.

Phoebe Green, cruel and manipulative, exploits her old boyfriend's insecurities by transforming herself into the repentant victim, successfully playing at sultry detective to both Mulder and her new side piece. (She also reveals an underlying attraction Mulder has to danger: that he is drawn to it in spite of his distrust for it.)

Reggie Perdue is the first person from Mulder's past that he is comfortable with: a private, widowed, aspiring writer who shared his dreams with no one but his young partner. Unfortunately, those dreams are never realized; and it's his death, as well as the young agent who was murdered by the same criminal, that digs into the depths of Mulder's self-punishment and regret. And guilt, of course.

In the aftermath of Scully's return in One Breath, Mulder's past dynamics change: the people who slink back into his life are ones whose respect he craves, covets, and will bend over backwards to earn and keep. These relationships deal heavy damage to his mature adult life.

Bill Mulder: what is there not to say about Bill Mulder (post here)? But the distance in his and his son's relationship hits home when Mulder goes in for a hug and Bill deflects with a handshake. Mulder's face says it all: it'd been so long since he'd seen his father that he forgot the house rules-- Bill Mulder doesn't allow hugs. And that doesn't change until sins are atoned in Anasazi.

Bill Patterson, a bitter man with a begrudging respect, stomps into his pupil's life and on all his toes and fingers only to end the posturing in disgrace. Mulder's old teacher, it seems, was one of the first people to turn on him for his spooky reputation, mocking yet coveting the Golden Boy's incredible ability at the same time. He and Mulder fall into old patterns: baring teeth and raising hackles while trying to win the other's approval; but Mulder's emotional progress saves him from following Patterson's mad method into the black hole of insanity.

Diana Fowley, the more polished ex from Mulder's past, further underlines Mulder's draw to the allure of danger, unpredictability, and seedy underbelly of human nature. His dream of her in Amor Fati tried to transform her into both-- ala the nurses in Kill Switch-- but couldn't quite balance domestic trust and happiness with the real Diana, a woman driven by advancement over loyalty, who would grip a smoking man's shoulder and hand for a leg up.

These relationships were relatively easy to resolve when compared to the damage of his childhood; but both of these past dynamics pale in comparison to the complexities of Mulder's present, with himself and with the most important person in his life.

Another Aspect of Mulder's Vulnerability: Scully

Despite many disasters happening throughout his and Scully's first year of partnership, it's not until Darkness Falls that the switch between friendly concern to ingrained guilt occurs: Mulder, before this point, gives tips and advice-- even yelling at her recklessness in Beyond the Sea-- but her near death in the woods is the turning point of his personal responsibility. It imprints so deeply on his mind that he denies Scully's offer to let herself go down by his side in Tooms, preferring that she be saved even if his career is doomed.

Then Little Green Men, then Duane Barry, then Ascension, then One Breath.

One Breath is another turning point-- the most important-- when the guilt from Scully's (second) near-death split from the corrosive damage of Samantha's abduction: during the case, Skinner posits Mulder could be just as liable as the men who did this to his partner; and Mulder, wrung-out and worn down, weeps alone in his apartment. However, Scully's resolve and "resurrection" proved that she didn't blame him, that the men who did this to her would be held responsible, and that she was an equal warrior in this battle to find out what happened to his sister. From this point on, the wrongs done to Scully are placed in a distinct category related only to his abilities as a partner-- in the fullest sense of that word-- rather than his failures as an older brother or "Spooky" Golden Boy or know-it-all basement conspiracist. His personal shields, sarcastic reservations, and kneejerk deflections are effectively gone between them, (though they do pop up in future, defensive fights.)

And while this is healthy for their partnership and future romantic relationship, it opens the floodgates for an even greater trauma: failing her as an adult with capabilities denied to him as a child-- Scully becoming collateral in his enemies' quest to stop him.

Firewalker doubles down on this new, internal shift: Mulder gently discourages Scully from joining the case, gently encourages her to stay where it's "safe", and rushes back, overjoyed and almost overcome at finding her alive in the finale.

The brand of Mulder Guilt is peppered liberally throughout the rest of the show: comforting and accepting comfort after Pfaster and both Modells, needing her reassurance for growing old and dying too soon, presenting a birthday keychain instead of a desk (because of her cancer), being shaken by images of a past life, then losing his faith and almost losing her all within a span of five intense years.

It's a new angle to his blossoming vulnerability: the Mulder who will sacrifice himself to help others-- be it victims or acquaintances or loved ones-- has tied his happiness and emotional vulnerability to a person he could lose (but doesn't believe he will) any ordinary day on the job. It's a precarious position for them both; but is daily proof that he trust her more than life itself.

Mulder's Character Arc (ala David Duchovny)

Mulder is Mulder and will struggle with this side of himself for the rest of his life; but he's makes significant personal development over the first seven years of his partnership.

"Rigid in a wonderful way" and "My one-in-five billion," and "You've kept me honest, made me a whole person" are incredible milestone markers on this journey; but the gold star has to be handed to David Duchovny for writing Mulder's three biggest breakthroughs.

In The Unnatural, Mulder's "joyless myopia" is whipped into clearer focus when Dales opens his eyes to "life on this planet" and "the mystery of the heart"; and because of that experience, he races to the ballfield and calls Scully in, carefree and exuberant and wanting to share this-- and so much more-- with her.

This episode ties inseparably into the scenes David wrote in The Sixth Extinction: Amor Fati. Mulder's secret desires, his dream of a normal life with a loving family surrounded by safety and peace is the second step of his baseball lesson, exposing how much he wants craves "normal" but without the luxury of being able to live that life. Besides, that's not who he and Scully are. So, he resurrects out of his dreams, ready to take what he has and turn it into a new and better reality, Scully at his side.

This, again, ties in perfectly with Hollywood A.D.: Scully and he and nothing between, eschewing the glitz of showbiz for a brand of glamor all their own.

Mulder's vulnerability has evolved, shifting from distance and deflection to desperation and despair to dedication and devotion: a testament to the obstacles he's hurtled in order to live each day proud of himself, and free.

May we all aspire to emulate Fox Mulder in that way.

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

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olivyh · 2 years

Note

Hihi!! I absolutely love your writing :DD

Can I request an Azul x Gn!Reader in which the Reader asks Azul a bunch of ocean questions and Azul answers them in excruciating detail? Fluff please!! The questions are completely up to you :D

Please take as much time as you need on this!! Make sure to take breaks and drink water :))

Hi!! Thank you so so much <<333 sorry for the delayed response, but this was so much fun to write! I'm not the best at ocean facts, so I hope this will suffice!!! I also hoped going to more lore-based questions was alright with you!

"So... how exactly do you breathe underwater?" Azul paused and looked up from his paperwork, unable to stifle the smile that slowly crept onto his previously pursed lips. It was a quiet day in the Mostro Lounge- Floyd was actually working for once, and there weren't any rowdy customers. He'd only gotten two contract deals, much to his dismay, but he was glad that he had more free time to spend with his lover. The prefect sits in one of the wooden chairs pulled up to his desk, a plate of shrimp chips and seaweed wafers between them and munches happily, their crunching breaking the silence that was otherwise occupied by the scratching of his pen.

Lately, the two had not had much time to spend together- what with their constant running around (Azul swore that he was going to pluck all the feathers from that crow if he overwhelmed them one more time) and his busy schedule. He felt a stab of regret after watching them fall asleep in his office one night, waiting for him to finish his endless mountains of work simply so they could have dinner together. Azul had never felt his heart constrict so painfully that it brought tears to his eyes when he saw that they made him dinner in a small box, the food having gone cold hours prior. He'd sat beside them on the firm leather couch then, slowly tracing over their features with his ungloved hand and biting back the tears that broke free from his sky-blue eyes and fell freely onto the back of his other hand, clenched painfully in his lap.

"We have gills, naturally," He pauses and lifts a finger, dragging it along the large marks that lined the sides of his neck- now made visible from his unbuttoned collar. "They never fully went away in our human forms. As you know we have gills on our ribs as well. We actually have to breathe through our mouths, which then moves through our bodies and into the gill's capillaries-" He pauses, looking over to meet the prefect's eyes. He flushes a bit under their unwavering attention, but he clears his throat and continues despite the pounding in his chest. "From there, the water runs over the gills and the oxygen is picked up by these blood vessels before being expelled from the gills."

"So the water goes out and not in?"

"Correct," He smiles, raising his hand and wiping away some crumbs that made their way onto their cheek. Azul huffs playfully, chuckling under his breath. "Really, such a messy eater~". The prefect sticks out their tongue playfully before moving onto another chip, popping it into their mouth and chewing carefully while staring at the ceiling, seemingly deep in thought.

"What if you accidentally breathe something in? Can you choke?"

Azul sighs and sits back in his chair, placing his pen down and crossing his arms. He doesn't miss how they seem to grin at him and his now relaxed posture- meaning that they would be talking like this uninterrupted for a good amount of time.

"We can't choke, my Dear," He takes a breath before pointing to the marks on his neck once more. "The oxygen goes in here and then is pumped into our lungs- unlike humans, our lungs aren't connected to any sort of windpipe and is instead filtered through our blood vessels-" He moves his hand down to his ribs, drawing invisible lines along the sides. "And food can't necessarily get stuck in here either. There are no direct passageways- they're simply slits in our skin to allow for breathing."

"So," They eat another chip, offering him another one. He gladly accepts it, leaning over and allowing them to feed it to him before leaning back in his chair. "Your lungs are free floating?"

"Not exactly. It's more like... there's nothing connecting them to our throats, if that makes sense." They hum in understanding, standing quickly. The mer jumps in his seat from the sudden action, feeling his face flush when they decide to abandon their seat and replace it with his lap.

Azul swears that he saw the heavens themselves beckoning for him when he feels their fingers lightly trace over the lines on the sides of his neck before trailing down to his ribs.

"So here... and here..."

Azul, struggling to catch his breath, nods. They had been dating for quite some time, and he should very well be used to their antics by now, but he could never get over the sudden spurts of physical affection they'd give him. The small and intimate gestures made his heart race and his head spin as he could swear that his legs were turning back into tentacles as the floor seemed to warp beneath his leather shoes. Their hand slowly traces back up to his neck, giving the marks one more affectionate rub before cupping his cheek. Their soft thumb rubs the skin just below his glasses, their nail clicking against the glass for a moment as he sighs happily and leans into their touch, allowing his own hand to run gently up their forearm. He relishes in the way their hand trembles for a moment and the goosebumps that begin to litter the exposed skin of their arm, glad to know that they weren't the only one to have this effect on him.

He cups their hand in his own, pressing his cheek deeper into their warm palm as he slips his eyes closed and sighs happily, turning his head ever so slightly to press a small kiss on the underside of their wrist, allowing his lips to linger there for a moment until he could hear the way their breath hitched and their thumb's movement on his cheek stuttered.

Azul opens his eyes in time to notice their face approaching his, and he beams at the giddiness and excitement that bubbles in his chest as they pepper his face in kisses playfully, spending more time to give extra love to the mole that sat below his lip. He chuckles and does the same to their face, using his free arm to hold them close to his chest as they squirm and giggle at his actions.

The mer parts for a moment, smiling softly as his eyes trace over their flushed face, still painted with a warm smile as their eyes crinkle from the effort, turning them into the most gorgeous half-crescent shapes he swore he'd ever seen. He looked over each and every one of their features, trying in vain to immortalize this moment and live in it forever; to take hold of this comfort and adoration that consumed his spacious office and put it in a bottle for his eyes alone.

"Any other questions for me, my Dear?" They shift in his lap, now fully facing him and resting their head against his shoulder, yawning. "I'm all yours."

"I know you are," He chuckles at their response and presses a kiss to their forehead, running his hand along their hairline until he notices that their shoulders begin to rise and fall evenly as their soft snores fill his ears. Slowly, he releases their waist and reaches behind him to pull his jacket off the back of his chair. With a little difficulty, he manages to wrap it around his still-sleeping lover as he relaxes beneath them. He sighs and takes his glasses off, tossing them haphazardly onto the hardwood of his desk, and rests his head against his lover's own, deciding that he was due for an afternoon nap as well.

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