#Each topic can take maybe. 2 paragraphs or 3. That is so many words

[breannasfluff]

Quick question, how do you write so much? I fight the words for an hour and have maybe 2 paragraphs of garbage but you pump out really nice work almost every day??? I have so many ideas but I can’t write them for love nor money

I write almost every day, or I take a break and switch it out for drawing. I generally can write a chapter in one go, so usually stock up some backlog to cover days I’m busy. Having multiple stories now means I don’t have that backlog of some, so updates are a bit slower.

As for writing tips:

1. Remove distractions. Shut discord, exit out of tumblr, mute your phone. When you are stuck, don’t go scroll social media. When writing, the only thing I touch the internet for is if I need to check a story item, like a character name, item history, etc. I cannot overstate how important this is. If you are talking to your friends, you won’t have a writing flow.

2. Do not edit as you write. Writing and editing are two different tasks. You switch between creative and critical thinking and it breaks flow. This is a scientific process and you can read more about it here.

Research electroencephalogram (EEG) suggests both heightened electrical brain wave activity and elevated dopamine levels during flow. In other words, your brain experiences both electrical and chemical changes when you’re “in the zone.”

But once you switch to self-editing mode, you move to the critical thinking side of your brain. You halt all of freewriting’s creative electrical impulses and pleasure-sensing dopamine levels. Your mind flips off one switch and turns on another.

3. Set a time, then be done. Give yourself 20 minutes and write as much as you can. Doesn’t matter if it’s garbage. You can edit garbage into something useful or you can chuck it in a bin. Just try to write, then take a break. Staring at a blank document for two hours isn’t going to make words appear and it just stressed out your brain.

4. Have an outline. Sometimes a magical idea just flows when you sit down to write, but generally not. Have an outline of what you want to have happen in your story or chapter. It doesn’t need to be in depth; for most of my oneshots I literally have a sentence or two at the top of the page. The story needs to have a goal. For example: Wild tries to teach Hyrule cooking. It doesn’t go well. Bouncing ideas off friends can be a big help! It’s why you’ve probably seen me post about prompts and suggestions, and sometimes stories are gifted to people. Talking through plot ideas can help you get a better outline or idea of action.

Misc notes:

Hate to say, but some of it is just practice. I’ve been actively writing for a little over a year with some breaks on and off. Making it a habit is a big thing for making it easy. It’s harder to restart after a break.

When I first started writing I tried to pick one aspect to improve for each story. Filter words, pacing, varying sentence starters, story arcs, etc. Fixing multiple things at once was too much work, but one item at a time was doable.

Filter words make such a huge difference in writing; I encourage you to look them up. It’s a PAIN to remove them in post, but it also taught me to cut them out. Now it’s unconscious and while some still show up, I tend to write them out automatically.

You can learn to write quickly, but if you don’t also work on quality you’ll just…write a lot. That said, it’s fanfic. Sometimes it’s just for fun and quality doesn’t matter. I’ve got plenty of stories that will never be posted because they are just for fun.

Some of it could be writing speed, too? I use a bot a lot of times for timing and tracking and generally average 30-35 words/min. Harder story topics are slower to write, like angst and emotional scenes.

I’m actually writing less this year than last, but I don’t put as much time into it. It also keeps it sustainable as a hobby, although I definitely hit periods of frustration. It can get overwhelming.

If you search my blog for the tag #writing advice or #writing tips, you should fine some other things as well.

This was rather frank, but hopefully helpful! Feel free to drop further questions and I’ll do my best to answer 💜

[slayingfiction]

Types Of Professional Editing

There are many ways to edit your work. The editing process itself is most often broken down into 5 major categories, give or take. The 5 steps are like building a house! This is a brief description of each, and I will then make separate posts to further develop on each topic, so stay tuned and follow along!

Step 1: Developmental Editing (AKA conceptual editing)

This stage of editing is early in the writing process. The editor helps you plan and plot your story and gives you ideas to help organize your story so that it flows well. They tell you what’s working and what’s not. They do not write or rewrite anything, but are simply there to help you strategize and plan to avoid plot holes, work on pacing and help you create a story that everyone will love. This is the house building part of designing the house layout, pouring foundation and putting up the whole house! It’s a big job. (I wrote that in Mario’s voice)

Step 2: Structural Editing (AKA content or substantive editing)

Much like developmental editing, this stage of the process is all about big picture in a more specific way. Here the editor will work through chapters, paragraphs and go through your whole story in a detailed way to find errors in continuity, plot holes, incomplete sections and smooth out the story, working on tone, voice and your target audience. They may move lines or paragraphs around to help with flow. This is the house moving part where you are looking at every room, finding which room you want dedicated to what, and you start moving your larger items into the house like beds, TVs, tables, etc.

Step 3: Stylistic Editing (AKA line or comprehensive editing)

This step is much more in depth. The focus is on the flow and impact of every word in every sentence. The editor moves line by line, eliminating jargon and cliches, unclear sentence structures and using clear and precise words when it helps the story. You’re now getting reading to move into the house. You’re picking the perfect wall colour to match your sheets and the decor you have packed up in bins and picking the perfect spot for the rest of the your furniture.

Steps 4: Copy Editing

This step is very straight forward and should only be done once the book is completely finished. This is all about grammatical errors, punctuation and spelling. I promise you, you can’t get all of these on your own. Even professional editors may only be able to catch up to 90% of mistakes. Spelling and grammar mistakes can be hard to spot, but even just having a few in your book can make people put your story down and never pick it up again. You’re putting all your stuff away. Clothes go in the correct drawers, spices get lined up in the pantry, your cutlery is getting separated into their own groups and you’re organizing your books on the shelf.

Step 5: Proofreading

The final step! This is all finishing touches, going over everything for any lasting mistakes. This step is usually done after formatting and typesetting to make sure everything flows properly and nothing is missing before being send to print or publish. Finally settling into the house :) You’re putting up a couple paintings, fixing the scratches and scrapes that happened while moving in, and setting fresh flowers into a vase in the kitchen. You can finally relax and maybe even invite people over to see it.

Some people don’t get an editor, while others may have multiple. It’s best practice to have multiple to look over it, and that’s typically what happens at traditional publishing houses. LOL it’s so expensive though, so do what you can. Are there any of these that you feel you’ve got handled by yourself? Are there any of these that make you dread editing your future book?

Did you know I currently offer services for steps 1 and 5? Send me a message if you have any questions :)

Keep an eye out for a more in depth description and explanation of each one separately!

Happy Writing and Happy World Book Day!

[whomst-the-hell]

How To Write An Essay

from someone who did pretty well in school. and i don’t mean the structure of an essay, because someone probably taught you that in class, i mean the actual process of sitting down to write an essay, which for some reason no teacher has ever addressed (at least to me)

(for the sake of this, I’m going to pretend i’ve been assigned an essay about shakespeare’s depiction of love in Romeo and Juliet, because I feel like thats a relatable point of reference idk)

1: scaffold. go into your document and create an outline in dotpoints of all your arguments. this is also where you put your quotes. (some people might find it helpful to also create some kind of mindmap pre- scaffold, but i tend to just use the scaffold as a mindmap, it depends on your preferred brainstorming techniques) for example, my scaffold might look like this:

intro

point 1: the relationship between love and violence

-friar and the plants

-romeo and juliet eventually die for love

-“starcrossed lovers take their lives” (act 1, scene 1)

-romeo and juliets love is arguably the cause for mercutio’s and tybalt’s death

-“i died under your arm”-mercutio (act, scene)

point 2: etc

this is much less effort than sitting down and actually writing out that paragraph.

the number of dotpoints needed per paragraph varies but as a rule of thumb i’d say 3-5. if you know a lot of information about a topic, only a couple points with lots of depth will do. if not, briefly talk about lots of things.

if you find yourself struggling with motivation, try to make scaffolding a bit fun. meme the fuck out of it. talk abt how romeo was a lil bitch who got the infinitely cooler mercutio killed like a moron. talk abt how much you hate shakespeare. no one is going to see it. IMPORTANT: make sure that you make it easy to find and remove the scaffold later. i do it by writing all my scaffolds *like this* so that i can go through at the end with ctrl+f and find all the **s, which i don’t generally use in the actual essay. you could do something else (maybe pick a number, or some other character) if ** wont work for whatever reason. you could also colour your scaffold so that you can visually see which bits to get rid of.

further things to note: DO NOT WORRY ABOUT PLAGIARISM. if you found a really good paragraph online where someone dissected the language used in the balcony scene, copy and paste that shit directly into the scaffold (remember to include the URL to make citation easy later). that way when it does come time to write this fucking thing, all of your information is in one place and you really just have to decorate it, which is honestly the less important part anyway. you will get more points for a badly written essay with good information than a well written essay with bad information.

another thing i like to do here is calculate roughly how many words i should write per paragraph. for example, if my essay is 1500 words and i’ll have three points, my breakdown may look like this

intro (100)

p1 (433)

p2(433)

p3(433)

concl(100)

i might even break it down further eg

p1: love and violence

-romeo and juliets death (108)

-tybalts death (108)

-mercutio’s death (108)

-friar’s plants monologue (108)

i get these numbers by literally putting them into a calculator. it may seem useless but it’s actually really quick, and it will be infinitely easier to convince yourself to write 108 words about romeo and juliets death than it will be to write 1500 words about the concept of love throughout the play.

(heres the formula for breaking it down btw: intro + conclusion = about the same each, generally smaller than a body paragraph. pick whatever number you think is appropriate for the total word count, minimum 50 words. my rule of thumb is <1000=50, 1000=100, 2000=200, etc. next, [total word count] - [intro+concl] = [body paragraphs]. next, [body paragraphs] / [no. of body paragraphs] = [wordcount per paragraph], next [wordcount per paragraph] / [no. of points]. written out this seems long, but it takes 5 seconds with a calculator- i just use google)

2: actually writing the essay. tragically i cannot give you the magic words to write a perfect essay, but one really good tip that i can give you is this: don’t stop scaffolding when you start writing. personally, i tend to get tripped up on details, and get stuck in one spot. for example: i know what all my arguments should be in my paragraph about love and violence, but i cannot for the life of me think of an introductory sentence. my paragraph might look like this for a while:

*epic guitar intro like in smells like teen spirit* This concept is demonstrated in the eventual deaths of the titular characters, Romeo and Juliet, as foreshadowed in the line “starcrossed lovers take their lives” (act 1 scene 1).

its sort of like skipping a question on a test then coming back to it later. there is no point in struggling over one sentence for hours — often, writing the rest of the paragraph will actually fill in your mental blanks and make it easier to write whatever you were struggling with.

other places ive found this method helpful: quotes. for example:

Romeo and Juliet’s love also caused violence to those around them. This is evident in the death of Mercutio, Romeo’s best friend. **find quote, and include analysis*** This demonstrates Shakespeare’s connection between love and violence.

in my experience, actually searching for a particular quote can throw off my momentum and fuck up the whole process. its been much better to just mark where i want that quote to go and come back later.

you can do this for single sentences or even whole paragraphs. i often write introductions last, because i never know what to say the first go round. you do not need to write your essay chronologically. go through one pass without losing momentum, hit ctrl+f, or find your coloured bits, to locate the problem areas. has writing the rest of it managed to fix the problem? no? try the next highlighted section! go back and forth like that until theres no more highlighted bits.

other assorted tips for writing an essay: don’t worry about repetition. for a lot of people (including me), writing is something that is supposed to sound good. we try to avoid repeating words/phrases too much because it can read as annoying or boring. as anyone who has read an academic paper knows, that actually means you’re on the right track. if your thesis statement is “shakespeare depicted love as a destructive and negative force” the words “destructive” or “negative” should probably be used 2-3 times a paragraph. you really want to hammer your audience over the head with your opinion.

also, as much as possible, try to make whatever the prompt is fun for yourself. this isn’t always possible of course, but it can really make the process easier. i know this wasnt my longstanding example, but as an actual real world example of this, i had to write an essay about the movie gattaca and how it incorporated its political themes into the narrative, and i argued that actually it had done a terrible job at that and that the movie as a whole sucked ass. i got 95%. if you have any kind of strong feelings about the topic, make them fit the question. its much less mind numbing than writing 2000 words you dont actually agree with for the sake of your grade.

if you need to take a break, maybe try working on homework for a different subject. this’ll shake things up so your brain is doing something new, but you won’t exit school mode and lose momentum entirely.

3: editing. dont worry too much. read through it so theres no glaring issues. try reading it out loud — you’re more likely to pick up on clunky sentences or grammar errors out loud. if you really want to do well, have someone else look over it (a classmate/teacher would be best bc they know what info was available to you but anyone will do)

final tips: its better to hand in something unfinished/badly written than nothing at all.

it is 100% better to sit down for five minutes and add 20 words to your essay than not to do anything. you dont have to dedicate your evening to it. progress is progress. a good way to do this is to get word/docs on your phone.

high school isnt life or death - failing this essay will not destroy you.

for essays on an exam, my best tip is don’t worry abt making it pretty. use the first page to make a mindmap. write more info later and use an arrow to show where it should be. it doesnt matter.

this might not work for you, but i hope it can act as a jumping off point to find what does work for you! go forth and conquer!

[the-cooler-king]

Teacher: your final paper should be no less than 10 pages

Me: oh word? Forreal? U gonna let me go like that?

[lilosaur]

◡̈⋆ʜᴇʟʟᴏ(*´∇`)ﾉ is it okay for me to request scenarios for mitsuya, inui, angry and kazutora helping their s/o who struggles with online classes? many thanks if you decide to do this one 💖💖

Yess! This was something I could relate too so much, I prefer in person myself it was such a struggle for me doing online. Thanks for requesting! 🤎

༑ ࿐ྂ。Helping You With Online Classes ♡.°⑅

⟶ ticket no. 11 ɞ

w/ Mitsuya Takashi | Inui Seishu | Kawata Souya | Hanemiya Kazutora

ʚ Mitsuya Takashi ɞ

It was late into the night around 2:30-ish am your eyes were heavy and body drained and worn out while the bright screen reflected in your eyes. Your phone buzzed and you debated picking it up, your arms were so tired. Your phone rang again, maybe this was the third time? You were already losing your train of thought. You reached over to grab your phone, it was your boyfriend? What was he still doing up at this hour?

“Mitsuya? Why are you still up?” You questioned waiting tiredly for a response.

“You never answered my text love, I wanted to make sure your alright. You sound tired though, why are you still up?” He responded, you were confused you didn’t hear a sound of tiredness in his voice.

“Oh um I’m still working on some homework that’s due tomorrow morning.” Your voice cracked and your tiredness could be heard from over the phone “it’s kind of confusing though”

“Hmm do you want me to come over and help you with it?”

You didn’t want him to stay up any longer either, he had a busy life with taking care of his sisters and looking after his friends, you can probably figure this out all on your own anyways. “No no, it’s fine I’ll just be up a little longer.” You lied, you knew this would take a few more hours at least but you didn’t want Mitsuya to worry too much. You both said goodnight as you hung up the phone. You tried your best to look at notes, documents, and even looking up stuff online but everything was worded differently. Your teacher was honestly garbage she made everything sound so confusing when explaining.

It was almost 3am now, you only completed 3/9 of the questions on your assigned worksheet you didn’t even know if your answers were right. A faint knock could be heard from your window which scared the living crap out of you. You peaked through your curtains to see Mitsuya standing outside with coffee and a smile.

Mitsuya told you that he can help you with your school work, he may not have ideal grades but maybe he’d be able to help a little bit. If not then maybe he could email your teachers for you if you get anxious about it.

You and Mitsuya were able to get all questions done, he was so proud of you, for pushing through each day one step at a time. You two ended up passing out on your bed, what a nice night…kinda.

༚༅༚˳❃˳༚༅༚

ʚ Inui Seishu ɞ

You and Inui were spending time at a coffee shop talking about how your days were going and new stuff that happened. You had your laptop with you since you two happened to see each other at the cafe but you planned to just do some school work. You told Inui you were gonna do some work but you can still talk, he said he’ll try to be quiet as he pulled out a book to read. You were having a hard time understanding the concept and filling out open note stuff is so hard for no reason. okay but like open note stuff is so annoying like multiple choice >>>>

You about half way into a paragraph answering the third question but your mind hit a blank, you felt so confused. You looked back at other documents, worksheets, and notes you took but it seemed like this was something your teacher explained in class. Let’s just say your teacher wasn’t exactly the best at teaching.

Inui looked over to you and your facial expression said it all, the confusion all over your face and your leg tapping on the floor up and down.

“Do you need any help y/n?”

You didn’t really want to trouble Inui with your schoolwork even though you were heavily struggling, you took a moment to think about it but before you could even respond to him he was already walking over to your side of the table hovering over your shoulders and his eyes directed at your laptops screen. You looked up at Inui, you could tell he was really thinking about the question.

“I’m not really the best with this y/n but maybe we can look it up or ask someone smarter than me.” Inui said while looking back down at you, concerned and confused look on his face he couldn’t seem to decipher this problem either as it’s wording was very strange.

Inui helped you contact someone who was in your class and you were successfully able to complete both sheets of work. Inui gave you a nice hug afterwards to let you know how proud of you he is, he knows it’s hard for you with online classes but you still push through everyday!

༚༅༚˳❃˳༚༅༚

ʚ Kawata Souya ɞ

You had to cancel your plans with Souya because your parent/s wanted you to get your school work done before tomorrow morning. You’ve been struggling to even log onto your laptop and show up to your classes. Online school is still just as draining as in person if not more.

You felt so bad for kinda ditching Souya today so you made sure to send him a more detailed message about why you really cancelled and your so sorry and you’ll make it up to him. You just hoped he wasn’t too effected from this. Souya tried calling you multiple times but your phone was set on ‘do not disturb’ mode, you finally took a break from some of your work which your not even half way done when you FaceTimed him.

“Hello? Souya?”

“Hi y/n..” You heard Souya's low voice, he was definitely a bit sad over not being able to hang out.

“Are you done with your homework yet, maybe we could still hang out for a bit.” He asked politely.

“I’m sorry, I’m still working on it. It’s really confusing. But maybe we can hangout tomorrow!” You tried to stay positive knowing that this work was going to take a long while. You honestly felt so bad letting Souya down but your work had to be done.

“Hmm, we’ll maybe I can help you with it. I’m pretty good with anything y/n.”

You never really realized it but Souya really did have good grades. He helped guide you through what problems you were struggling with and he was even able to help you understand all the concepts better. It didn’t even take up too much of your time, you guys got it done in about 1 hour and your pretty positive most of the answer are right…sort of.

You two both talked for a bit before falling asleep while still on FaceTime together, after all it was still a school night. Souya was definitely very proud of you and happy to help, you’ve been pushing through this whole time all alone so he’s thankful he could help make it a bit easier for you! :)

༚༅༚˳❃˳༚༅༚

ʚ Hanemiya Kazutora ɞ

You and Kazu were getting a late night snack, you had taken a break from your time consuming study guides and worksheets, barely making it half way through part one of the study guide. It was a struggle but you’d hope that maybe after a snack with your lovely boyfriend you’d feel a little more motivated.

You guys decided to get brownies from a little corner shop and to share a soda. You found a bench to sit at and eat, you two chatted and somehow got to the topic of school. Kazu said he pretty much didn’t take school seriously at all and his grades didn’t really matter because he wasn’t going anywhere good in the future. You told Kazu all about your online school, you didn’t like it one bit. Kazutora understood where your coming from since he despised school just as much as you did.

You told Kazu you were kind of in a hurry because of your school work, Kazu took your little hints and insisted you let him help you out. He wouldn’t let you say no either, he knows you don’t like online school and you have troubles with completing work. Kazutora wasn’t the smartest but he wasn’t the dumbest either so he’d help you as much as he could.

You let Kazu help you and fortunately you were able to finish up most of your study guide and one of your worksheets. Kazutora offered for him to have a ‘talk’ with your teacher but you almost yelled at him to just leave it be..you’ll manage somehow.

You and Kazutora ended off the night with a walk around town talking about all your troubles in the world. Kazu told you how proud he was, you were able to get most of your work done even if it wasn’t right or you still missed some questions it was a start. One step at a time and you’ll be there soon, wherever your trying to end up in life if you just push on a little longer you’ll be there in no time.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this one. If you struggle with school in general just know your not alone, a lot of people have mental problems formed from school but I promise with a little bit of effort and if you push through just a bit longer you’ll make it to where you want to be. I believe in you all! :)

[thejustmaiden]

So out of nowhere I was tagged and quoted by a SR shipper for a blog of mine posted in August of last year. Talk about throwback but, hey, gotta appreciate that level of snooping. 😉

Back in the day I actually used to encourage discourse amongst Inuyasha fans- both shippers and antis alike- but I've since realized that it's a lost cause. But for you, @feministmetalgreymon , I'll grant this exception. Just 'cause it's been a while so why the hell not. haha

I want to assure you, however, that nothing you say will ever convince me that Sesshomaru and Rin are meant to be together romantically or that the story intended it so. Nor will you find any validation here. You can ship them for all I care, but please for all that is good and holy while I have your attention try- I mean really try- to understand why it is so many of us Inuyasha fans are so against this pairing in the first place (newsflash: it's not about ship wars), and why we believe a romance between the two of them is completely and utterly out of character.

For those of you interested in reading this, the blog of mine in question that the above shipper mentions in their counter-argument is here for reference. It's titled "Jaken = Rin's Dad?" I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'm also making no such promises. After all, I'm not exactly known for my brevity. haha Now let's get crackin'!

Like you, feministmetalgreymon, did for your recent blog here where you took screenshots of mine to address certain parts, I will be doing the same and dissecting yours accordingly.

[Snippet 1]

I worked with kids for many years as a teacher, and many people in my family have too or still do. Two of them happen to be just over 5 feet which is quite short for the average adult woman living here. I've also worked alongside many a women of short stature, and never did I hear any of them complaining of issues with their students having difficulty differentiating them from their own peers just because they were short as well. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous. Kids are quite smart and pick up on a lot more than you seem to give them credit for. Height is not the only characteristic they look at to determine who's an adult and who's not, and it's foolish to suggest otherwise. So unless you're a babysitter who's still in their teens and/or who has very childlike features or behavior then I'm afraid what you're getting at is total hogwash. This is just another example of how you shippers offer nothing of real substance to your reasoning, it's only ever cherry-picking or strawmanning from you guys. Stop deflecting from the real issues please, because this certainly isn't one and only winds up being a complete waste of time for all parties involved.

[Snippet 2]

Okay, calm down now. I wasn't insinuating that relationships between parents and children can't change over time in terms of how they get along. Of course that's possible, as all families experience their fair share of estrangement and abuse. What I was speaking about was in reference to the overall dynamic between the two. Because a bad mother or father can still be viewed as a parental figure to their child even if say they're not in said child's life anymore. Since Sesshomaru and Rin share a healthy bond- and just a friendly reminder that in my blog I even said that he doesn't have to necessarily be labeled her father but that a romantic relationship later would still be inappropriate- I didn't deem it necessary to address what you brought up. Plus, it kinda, umm, misses the point?? Please, let's stay on topic. And it's not captured in the screenshot, but stop acting like there isn't a small part of them that idolizes their parents at some point during childhood. Just like you mention later on how it's normal for kids to have innocent crushes on adults that they eventually grow out of? Well, guess what, the same concept applies here. Kids eventually learn that their parents are far from perfect and make mistakes too. Rin is so damn young in the OG series though that we never even get to see her reach that maturity level.

[Snippet 3]

LOL! Alright, okay, so the "unbreakable bond" bit you're mentioning was actually me quoting you sessrinners. Did you not catch that? I literally spelled it out. *sigh* The whole point I was making is that shippers like yourself make hypocritical and contradictory statements all.the.goddamn.time. One moment you guys claim that Sesshomaru and Rin were essentially strangers and meant very little to each other, only to say in the same breath a few seconds later that they were destined to be together and their bond is like no other. I agree, their bond is special, but why must that mean they're going to fall in love?

That is the root of the matter here. Too many animes/mangas have romanticized this older adult man & young girl growing up falling in love trope that it's become way too normalized and widely accepted across the world- and yes, in some cultures more than others. Sadly, you lack the awareness to recognize how this all works. You know how we know that? When we see that you shippers are so desensitized to sexualized images of girls in the media that you share posts like this one below which *subtly* imply a future romance although one half of that pairing is still just a child in the pic and then try and pass it off as cute. That's like super fucking problematic and it scares me that you can't see that (or deny you do). 🤢

After all that's said and done, Sesshomaru leaving Rin in the village with Kaede is to me the strongest indicator more than pretty much anything else he's done for Rin that proves he is her adoptive father. It's so funny to me how you somehow see the exact opposite though. 🤔 What I think is happening is that you got yourself on some squeaky clean ass shipper goggles fresh out of your little echo chamber. Because I hate to tell you, but what you're fantasizing is what you want to see and not what's actually there on screen or was written into the story. I'm strictly talking about Inuyasha and the manga of course. [For the TL; DR version skip to the last paragraph.]

Parents looking after their kids is what parents are supposed to do. A good parent will do anything to keep their child safe and ensure they are cared for, so what he did for her by leaving her there was in her best interests clearly. Besides, as a babysitter, you more than most people should understand that parents aren't always able to be there for their kids so sometimes others gotta step in to help. Haven't you heard of the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child?" Which in Rin's case is literally true! 😂 Sometimes kids are even sent off to stay with grandparents and that's who raises them instead. Or maybe they have to temporarily live with an aunt or uncle because their single parent's job requires they work out of town 4-5 days of the week so they're hardly home. But that doesn't mean that the parents care or love their kids any less, and it's foolish to assume that Sesshomaru must have thought very little of Rin simply due to the fact that he made the decision to leave her in the village. Come on, y'all are acting like he abandoned her there!!

It's just given the circumstances Sesshomaru finally came to learn that Rin traveling with him was no longer safe. I also like to think it's because he wished for her to live a more normal life and to learn how to fully trust humans again. Plus, continuing to travel with him as young as she was would have proven dangerous and unwise. Now for you to know all this and still manage to turn his past actions towards her while she was just a child into a romantic gesture is what boggles my mind. Regardless of how you look at it, from my perspective or your own, Sesshomaru is in the wrong. Either he's a father figure who impregnates his daughter at the young age of approximately 14. OR he's this man she used to travel with who maybe isn't a father to her but who nonetheless basically rapes her since kids her age can't consent to sex with an adult. Idk about you but it sounds to me like nobody here wins with either scenario we're given. In other words, you should be just as mad as we are. If only one side didn't choose to forsake their morals they know we both have in common for the sake of a ship. Welp. 🤷‍♀️

I agree, incest is disgusting but that's not the only problem we have with this pairing. A romantic bond forming between Sesshomaru and Rin would also constitute as grooming.

You realize that over the years he visited her in the village that he brought her gifts too and essentially watched her grow up right before his very eyes, right? I mean, I know you do, but I really shouldn't have to explain further why pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship with each other is plain and simple wrong. And before you say it's not because he didn't have any malintent, please understand that considering their history and power dynamic up to then that yes this is still considered grooming even if Rin supposedly "wanted it" or "made the first move." Whether you consider him her father or not, as the adult who took on a role resembling that of a caretaker in her early life- a critical developmental time for a child- Sesshomaru is obligated to turn down any advances by Rin and most definitely should not initiate any himself. As the first close adult figure she's had in her life since her parents died, it's unfathomable to imagine how Sesshomaru could go through with taking advantage of this young girl who was under his care and supervision since they met. To think he could be capable of betraying that trust sickens me to the core.

This. Now THIS is how a parent/guardian or a similar adult caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etc.) talks to a child. And, in turn, this is how some young children talk to adults. You'd be insane and delusional to deny it! We see it in our everyday lives, do we not? From where else do you think our stories draw most of their inspiration? Yes, obviously these fictional universes have aspects of fantasy that don't exist in the real world, but so how then do you suppose we're able to relate to them? The reason for that being is because these stories are written by people for people, so naturally there are going to be real life aspects embedded throughout. Sure, a little escapism doesn't hurt as we don't need to take everything so seriously, but ultimately we all need to recognize that the messages in the stories we tell matter. Most stories possess a combination of both light and dark themes, but when it specifically comes to the latter we gotta be careful with how we tackle this in children's media since kids are far more impressionable.

So if at the center of a story we have two of the main protagonists whose mom is basically their same age and to top it off she knew their dad when she was just a girl and who just so happened to help raise her, wouldn't you say that's beyond fucked up or at the very least so fucking weird? Like why would we think it's even remotely okay for our children to watch this garbage?? Really think about it. Try and be objective for once and think about how it would sound explaining this storyline to an outsider who's never watched IY or HNY. Well, antis have tried this before many times and we always get the same reaction: Ewww!

Like I said earlier, if you wanna ship it then fine, but 1) please stop seeking our approval or trying to change our minds - your ship wish came true didn't it, so why do you need us to validate it? 2) even though it's not canon, respect that we don't support this sequel portraying pedophilia in a positive light. It's harmful af to not only allow but glorify the continuation of sexualized images of young girls everywhere. And I shouldn't have to say this, but just because this trope is popular as you say does not make it right. Lolicon themes in the media have been an issue forever and it needs to stop. Yes, even some people in Japan or "the East" would agree. Shocker!

We're pissed off and rightfully so because Yashahime's TV rating is 14, not to mention it airs at the prime time kids in Japan watch TV after getting home from school. That's Towa and Setsuna's age, true, but if Rin being the mom when she's like only a year older than them (please don't argue w/ me about the math- antis have so far been right every time with it) is straight-up disgusting and not something we should be supporting or endorsing. Rin's a whole ass child!! Please don't start with the "but times were different then so her having kids at 15 is acceptable" argument either, because we've already debunked that and every other single excuse you guys throw at us. Besides, how or why would you expect young viewers to know these historical "facts" anyway, especially if as you suggest fiction doesn't affect reality so what does it matter? Yet here we are, arguing over a fictional show in real life almost a year and a half into the "Sesshomaru fucks?" sequel being announced. My ass, your ass, hell all our asses fiction doesn't affect reality!

Look, I do apologize if the tone of this blog came off as snippy or condescending at times. I do not wish you any ill will, it's just I'm not really sure what you expected to get out of all this besides maybe getting on my nerves perhaps. haha A lot of you shippers have been desperately scrambling to interact with us, lurking in our tags, jumping onto our posts screaming canon and getting so defensive even though you sought us out first. We've been sticking to our tags, so how about you stay in your lane too. By the way since we're on the topic, have you seen Twitter or Reddit?! SR shippers there are the actual worst and many Inuyasha fans (not just antis) have complained of not feeling welcomed to engage in fandom spaces anymore. Shippers swarm them and scare them off simply because fans don't like your ship and refuse to accept it. It's pathetic, really. No one should ever be bullied or harassed just because they don't like something you might. We're all fans of Inuyasha, aren't we? So let's act like it. Yashahime on the other hand, you guys are welcome to that pungent heap of trash. Fans have a right to criticize it too, but if you like it then good for you, so keep on liking it and don't mind us.

I'm almost done, but real quick back to Jaken! Let's not forget about how the official Yashahime website- which came out after my blog, mind you- described Jaken. This translation isn't the best one available but it's the only version a fellow anti friend could track down. They do recall a better one done by a native Japanese speaker who was also an anti, and that member confirmed that Jaken is indeed called Rin's babysitter. So you see, I was right in my interpretation. In the original post I did compare Jaken to a brother, but after talking to others (some comments can be found under said post) I did acknowledge that he's more of a reluctant babysitter who's not related. And if he's not at least a brother to Rin, then he's definitely not her father.

At the end of the day, the creator Rumiko Takahashi has the final word. Which is guess what? Hogosha. 💖 Probably should've just started out with that and saved us all the trouble, huh? Good day/night to you.

Papamaru bids you adieu now. 🤞

[thegingeralien]

Thought I might share my “doing homework with adhd” tips in case the might help even just one person (because that would make me feel happy).

Who am I to be giving you advice? Good point! I am still terrible at studying and I’m 26 and at University for the millionth time. But I have studied A LOT in my 22 years of schooling with varying degrees of success.

I see a lot of people, especially teenagers or first year university/college students, with ADHD asking for tips on how to study. But if you do a google search most of the websites and advice that comes up can be extremely ableist. So I hope I can help someone!

TIPS TO HELP YOU STUDY WHEN YOU HAVE AN ADHD GREMLIN BRAIN!:

1. Chewing gum!

- This might come across as a weird one, but it has actually really helped me. I use it as a form of stimming to help keep me focused and concentrating. Other forms of stimming can potentially end up being more of a distraction when you actually need to be reading or writing - but they can help if you just need to be listening. Try not to get a bubble gum or fun flavoured one though - as they can end up making your mouth feel dry, lose flavour quickly, and just give your brain way too many sensory things to become distracted with.

2. Buying colour coded stationary!

- New stationary can make me really excited to start studying, but that excitement never lasts long and the act of buying stationary can sometimes become it’s own hobby. That’s not what we are going for here. I really recommend, especially if you are a visual learner like me, to buy colour coded stationary. This means removable page markers, different coloured post it notes, highlighters, sometimes even pens. This way if your mind jumps from one topic to the other, it doesn’t matter. Go with the flow. Forcing your ADHD gremlin brain to focus can be extremely counter intuitive. So pick a colour for each topic, and stick to that system to find organisation among your own chaos!

3. Buy a really cheap, boring year diary with hardly any writing inside.

- Not sure if your school/university has their own diary but they can be perfect for what I am on about. Generally you can find them for really cheap, soft cover, no writing or designs within the dates. Just dates, days, weeks and lines where you can write your homework. This helped me a lot in High School. I wish I had kept doing it in University, but I am good with giving advice, and not so much with taking it. I used to decorate the outside of it however I wanted. Some years I would redecorate the same diary every semester. In the public holidays or holiday days I would colour those lines in with different highlighters to make it look like a rainbow. But every assignment due date, homework, draft, rewrite, form I had to bring back, library book due date, school activity days, ANYTHING to do with school I would write in there with reminds and check lists. Important due dates would be highlighted, general homework and daily to do lists t(o help me not leave my assignments to the last minute) would have a tick box beside them (because ticking tick boxes is free dopamine). Try to not put birthdays or fun things in it. This is a small way to stay on track so it helps you actually stay on track with the big things when you’re home.

4. Big whiteboards stuck on the wall where you can’t avoid it.

- This is not something I had in school, but I so wish I did. I have been using this recently to keep on top of house work (as maintaining your own house is tiring) and my small business or other things I really can’t avoid. If I physically write it down (not just in my phone) it psychologically does help you commit it to memory. Again, physically putting a line through a task you just completed is a hecking great rush of dopamine. But the biggest reason I love my white board, I can’t ignore it. It is stuck to the wall and is never out of sight, out of mind. I can’t put my phone or diary down and then refuse to look at it until I’m past the due date. Again, I’m not a perfect person, there are days where I don’t do anything I have written on the white board. But the great thing is, I don’t have to continuously feel like I failure, as I can wipe it all off the next morning or week and start fresh. I also put important things I have to remember that I’m doing during the week so I don’t forget them.

5. Icky Medication.

- I know not everyone wants to be on medication, and I understand. I am not forcing you to. No matter what your opinions are, you lovely gremlin who is still reading this post, regarding medication, you are valid and I respect you. My personal experience with medication has not been the best. I have been misdiagnosed for a severe chunk of my academic life which has seen me trying to focus and maintain school work under some even worse states then I am unmedicated! However, since receiving my diagnosis and finding the right ADHD medication for me, I have the ability to get so much work done without having to unnecessarily struggle. It’s unfortunately not magic, it will not turn me into a robot that makes me do work and turn out incredible, noble peace prize winning assignments (as much as I wish that were possible). I still have the ability to be a lump, doom scrolling through tumblr, forgetting to eat, and ignoring responsibilities. But it really helps me when I sit down and start that thing that isn’t fun. Yesterday it helped me hyperfocus on cleaning my office which was a terrifying room to be in. So it’s pretty close to magic in my opinion!

6. Accessing Disability Support at your place of learning.

- Not all of you taking the time to read this will have either a) an offical diagnosis or b) a good disability support available to you wherever you are completing your studies. And that is okay. This dot point just won’t be for you right now. But keep it in mind for a time when it might apply to you, as it’s something I never thought I would need, but will never take for granted ever again.

- If you have an offical diagnosis and Disability Support, make an appointment with the disability support adviser. DO IT NOW! Get your psychiatrist to write a diagnosis letter outlining that you have <enter superpower that makes you hilarious here> and that you are receiving <enter x,y,z treatment here> and that you would benefit from receiving <enter what you have always wished you had on the days you can’t make your ADHD gremlin brain do the thing here>. Now these benefits can be, but not limit to: automatic extensions on ALL assignments, extra time on exams, extra breaks to walk around while taking exams, special consideration when marking assignments, my university allows me to take exams in a separate room with only the other students in my subject who also have disability support (occasionally I have taken an exam alone with only a tutor present) so I don’t get distracted, permission to take fidget items into class or exam (I have the option to wear headphones, as long as I can display that they are not connected to anything). Maybe you can come up with some great ones for you with your disability advisor or your psychiatrist.

- The disability advisor will often go through your course outline with you at the start of each semester or year. This is annoying and a great time for disassociating, but can be useful in hindsight because you are made aware of everything that will come up during your class so you are not surprised. Because lets be honest, it is unlikely you are going to look at the course calendar too often.

- Side Note: I make an appointment every semester with my disability support officer for my area of study to make sure I have my special considerations for the year. Now I may go through the whole year without ever using my considerations. However, the fact that I know they are there takes an insane amount of pressure off of myself. If I’m having an insanely screwy loony tune mental health moment, I can email my coordinator my disability plan and say I need an extension due to personal reasons, and WHOOP, there it izzzzz.

7. Dedicated one thing or a few things that have nothing to do with food/alcohol/other substances to reward yourself with for doing the thing!

- This may not work for everyone. It doesn’t always work for me. I used to reward myself with food, but that only reinforced my stimming with overeating and my already bad relationship with food. And I feel as though that would be the same with any other substance that can be linked with addiction. (Addiction is a tough word, cause what aren’t I addicted to, I have ADHD, but hopefully you get what I mean!).

-Now, boring try and not choose this aside, lets think of somethings that work really well as rewards!

- My partner likes to come give me a kiss and a hug when ever they have written and reread a paragraph, you might buy a book when you get a really good mark, you might want to go make a cup of tea and watch an episode of your hyperfixation after studying for <enter a good period of time here>, you might allow yourself to partake in an activity you usually do while procrastinating (but at least this time you know you aren’t putting something off), talk to someone who you know will tell you they are proud of you as they understand the mental struggle you go through to concentrate (if you can’t think of anyone, it is 110% okay if that person are the amazing people on tumblr or the adhd tumblr chats. We will freaking pop a bottle of champagne for you cause we get it!).

- Try and make what ever you choose be something in a different room or away from your working space. Getting out can really calm you down.

8. Don’t be afraid to ask for assistance.

- This is true for anything, but I don’t mean just asking your teacher to give you extra help understanding the task and marking rubric. Many people online, tutors, librarians at your school, past or present students offer assistance rereading and making small edits (they won’t make it magical unfortunately) to your assignments. If you are like me and once you have written or completed the dreaded thing, you can not imagine or force your gremlin brain reread or edit the thing. So it can help to just delegate this to someone else, who hasn’t read it before, so they won’t disassociate or skim read it. They will often notice things you never would have even if you were neurotypical as that is just what happens when you have been working on something for so long.

9. Repetitive music.

- It generally helps if this has no lyrics. Lo-fi is amazing. Classical is alright too if it works for you, but both my partner and I agree that it can really assist you to keep up pace and focus when the beat is a high and repetitive (almost meditative) tempo.

10. Limit your screen space.

- This is a tip completely from my partner @dr-adhd who also has ADHD, is an avid PC gamer and is consistently in a battle with their gremlin brain to focus on completing their PhD. They have discovered that it really helps them to limit their screen space - simply put, work on one screen only. They have done more work more easily when they have their one screen on their laptop to focus on. Whereas their office has multiple screens so they could be playing runescape, watching YouTube, listening to lo-fi and doing work - which never worked (shocking right hahaha).

11. At the risk of sounding like a Mum... Put your phone and other electronics other than the assignment necessary one, away.

- I am a Mum, but to a fluffy puppy dog, so I hate to sound like my Mum when I was in high school, but she was right. Mobiles are the single easiest and biggest distraction in ADHD history. I often, even at coffee shops, have to turn my phone over so that I am not consistently looking at it every time the screen lights up to say the pizza place has sent me a coupon, or a carpet place that has been having a sale since I was born is... still having a sale, or a friend from school wants you to watch this TikTok. Even though you might not want to ignore your friends, because people pleasing, difficulting making/keeping friends and RSD are hecking real things, but they can all wait. Trust me, none of them are urgent. That TikTok will still be funny in an hour or two. And I’m probably completely right when I say that whomever just messaged you, never replies as quickly as you want them too. So I doubt they are going to think twice if you are MIA to finish your thing.

My partner or I might add to this later, but at the moment I already know that I probably wouldn’t read this wall of words if I was the one reading it, so if you are still with me, THANK YOU and I really hope I might have helped you. Sorry for the mound of words, but maybe you can reblog, screen shot, or save this and read a dot point at a time or refer to it when you need. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, I promise what ever it is, I’ve asked the same thing once in my life or something MUCH stupider.

[borkthemork]

Got tagged by @calamity-unlocked for the procrastinating writer ask, and might as well! Always fun to get away from the pains of editing, RIP to Falling Down Dry’s eighth chapter.

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

26.

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

220,000.

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

A lot. Just...a lot before I got into Ao3 so let’s keep it at that. But mainly I wrote for SU, Amphibia, and FMA.

4) What are your top five fics by kudos?

-Death of the Ego

I would say this happened because I wrote this at the right place at the right time. People had been theorizing that Steven would get corrupted ever since the trailer to SUF, and I originally made this as a one-shot...until people encouraged me to start exploring it.

Wouldn’t say it was my best work, but every time I wrote something it meant I improved slowly, and I would always appreciate that no matter the weather.

-Doesn’t Have to be Solo

Oh man, I loved this one! Just a series of connected events with Steven going on his road trip, and learning more about himself and who he was along the way. It also was the fic where I needed a lot of beta readers as time went on, so it made me learn a lot about grammar, prose, and overall the internal rules I developed while writing in general.

-Beyond the Music Box

This was the surprising one! This fic was originally a place where I could archive all the drabbles I written on Tumblr, and y’all really wanted it due to how chaotic my tag format is for this stuff.

It’s surprising for me because I didn’t expect a lot of love when it came to my casual writings since they take I don’t know an hour or so in creating, so thank you everyone who encouraged me to do this.

Just ignore the fact I’ve been lazy at updating the drabbles, shhhh.

-Building One Up

Marcanne, my beloved. Me and my friend kept talking about how Anne was a buff dork and this was at a time where no one really focused on that except mainly on Sasha when it came to strength (for obvious reasons).

I found this slander (I’m joking, by the way) and decided that I needed to write my feelings out on the topic.

And y’all agreed with me so dthdfthtfhtfht.

This also was the first time I had to hone in on a new form of characterization entirely, being that I infused the character’s thoughts and feelings into the way the prose flowed out itself. For Marcy, I went on a pretty analytical front with this piece, and it helped me get into the groove for people like Anne and Sasha and many others over the course of writing.

-Late Night Talks

I didn’t expect this one to blow up at all. I wrote this at one a.m. and y’all just grabbed this fic and ran, I am still confused.

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I respond to comments all the time because comments just give a lot of serotonin, you know? Someone took their time out of their day to remark on things I did in the work itself, and it’s just very validating to see. It also creates this environment that says, “Yes, I see you, and you can interact with me anytime you want.” so it’s all about that friendliness unless you’re rude to me back.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Pizza for One. Had an angst kick when SUF occurred so I milked it whenever my motivation got the best of me.

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t write crossovers unless you mean a crossover of characters to a new environment and set of rules. I would gladly write characters into the FMA world, oh my Lord!

But I guess the craziest stuff I’d written would just be comedy sketches? Best example would be Joe and Bessie having kids and Marcy having a conniption over it, so take that what you will.

8) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I don’t believe so? I did get one person on my old SU fic asking me to continue while giving me unsolicited advice but they apologized not soon after.

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do write smut. I write it privately but I adore characterization and intimacy, and so I try to make rather domestic pieces that connect to the characters themselves. If it has a certain kink, I make sure to research it so I could understand why the character finds the act rather arousing, and I just want to pay respects to the act itself.

Even with our current day and age, there’s still a lot of conservative anti-sex rhetoric going around, and I always try to view the act of physical intimacy in the same lens as one who adores love in all its different facets and forms.

10) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

11) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope to that either!

12) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Sadly, no. I do art trades with people and those are lovely to do since we get to brainstorm and make art together, but I’ve never co-written work with someone. If anyone wants to do that, then sure, just hit me up.

13) What’s your all time favourite ship?

It changes every season, every morning tide, every peace loving hour on the Planet Earth.

It’s Marcanne, right now.

When it comes to ships I always go with the Friends-to-Lovers dynamic, but a lot of the ships I have come from seeing the amount of intrigue in how that type of ship would play out. That could be with Kannao and the amount of commentary over Japanese gender biases, or Royai with their very complicated but extensive adoration and loyalty to one another.

For Marcanne, it’s all about that playful banter that could definitely bubble out of the surface if you just (bangs table) allow them to communicate and be transparent fully. (cries)

14) What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Sadly, that Anne fic with her confiding in Hop Pop after they get settled in her house. After what happened with the sneak peek, I realized that this fic would need a lot of build-up to be satisfying and I didn’t have the strength to do a 10k build-up to Anne crying.

Maybe I’ll finish it, we’ll see.

15) What are your writing strengths?

Writing strengths would be concise prose and characterization. I am a worry wart, I worry over the importance of each paragraph and how it all forms and transitions together, it’s just a part of how I work a great deal of the time. And man, characterization is the big one for me, if I don’t understand how the people work and could theoretically function in the story itself, I feel absolutely lost.

Which is also the reason why I’m struggling right now with FDD Chapter Eight, because Marcy’s reaction to Yunan keeps eluding my grasp!

16) What are your writing weaknesses?

I overthink a lot. Concise prose is great but I force myself to get all fancy and massive with details since I’ve got to unless I want a specific part to be so quick and unmeaningful, and this leads to pacing issues or just not enough intended time for people to breathe in the fic itself.

17) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I need to get a beta to make sure I don’t sound like an asshole, haha. I do love other languages, they are beautiful and can add a lot towards an audience who does know the language itself, but it depends on the work I’m doing.

18) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

That would be uhhhhh, my memory is lacking but Minecraft. The whole videogame had a wish fulfillment atmosphere to it, and since I got rather obsessed by how anything could happen in the engine itself I went with it.

19) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

When it comes to me, my own perception of my art changes day to day. Back when I first posted the Lapidot fic I thought it was the best thing I’ve ever done even though now, with the knowledge I have from workshops and betas, that the style I drafted had a lot of grammar and prose mistakes that I wouldn’t make in the future. It is pretty subjective, but for now I think the best fic I could look at right now would be amestrian catcher (set something ablaze).

Thank you Calamity once again for this! And I’ll be tagging @resplendent-chungus, @aanau, and @golddragon387!

[myaekingheart]

20 [Fanfic Writer] Questions Game

Thank you so much for tagging me, @lemony-snickers! This is tons of fun, I love answering these kinds of big questionnaires 😂💕 Also putting mine under a cut because there’s a lot of questions and I like to ramble. 

Also gonna go ahead and just tag whoever wants to do this! 😅💕

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

As of August 27, 2021, I have a total of 77 works on my AO3! 

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Funny enough, I was just looking at this, specifically, earlier today and kind of laughing about it. Right now, my total word count across all my works is 1,148,941 😬 

3. How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Apparently 12, but some of them I don’t really consider “big” in my fandom repertoire. Naruto is my greatest fandom with a total of 60 fics so far, followed by The Chronicles of Narnia and Rise of the Guardians. The rest are ones I either did crossover fics with or just did one-off little pieces with--The Incredibles, Tangled, Brave, How to Train Your Dragon, Arthurian Mythology, Disney Princesses, Fairy Tales and Related Fandoms, Back to the Future, and Frozen. 

4. What are your Top Five fics by kudos?

The Scarecrow and The Bell (Naruto) - 470 kudos The Day Kakashi’s Mask Slipped (Naruto) - 139 kudos Sunflowers (Naruto) - 92 kudos Sakumo the House Husband (Naruto) - 81 kudos Someone to Lean On (Naruto) - 67 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always try to respond to comments, because I like to acknowledge when people respond to my work. I cherish comments like nobody’s business, especially when they’re kind and reactionary. I just really love seeing/hearing what people think of the way a story is progressing, or what they thought of a one-shot. Comments keep me going especially when it comes to longfic so I want to be able to let readers know that I do in fact see their comments, that I’m acknowledging what they’re saying, and that I appreciate them. Plus, it can be kind of fun to tease upcoming events in a fic through responses to people’s comments, too. Because I’m mean. 

6. What fic have you written with the angstiest ending?

Definitely Hothouse (Rise of the Guardians/The Incredibles; Jack Frost x Violet Parr; American Horror Story AU). This was the first multi-chaptered fic I ever wrote to completion and I honestly cringe when I remember it exists both because it’s so poorly organized (and full of nasty plot holes) and because I just went ham on the gore factor. It definitely has a really bittersweet and heartbreaking ending to it, too. 

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I think I’ll definitely have to say Temptation. The story itself was kind of a ride, and it’s only the first installment in a series, but it follows the plot of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe but remixed due to the presence of an original character, but the ending is still roughly the same as the original: they defeat the evil, the Pevensies are all crowned kings and queens, happy days. Reading the last few paragraphs of the last chapter honestly still gets me all up in my feelings. 

8. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I used to be more of a crossover writer due to one of my main ships being a crossover ship. They weren’t super crazy, though, because they were both CGI-animated films. The craziest crossover I’ve ever written is an in-progress/unfinished multichapter piece, Kakashi, Enchanted, that sees our favorite Copy Ninja get kamui’d into the Disney princess dimension and has to help the likes of Snow White, Cinderella, and Rapunzel on his journey to find a way back to his own world. It’s a super weird premise but definitely one of my more lighthearted works and fun to revisit when I need to decompress. 

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I don’t think I’ve ever received hate so much as I’ve received criticism. The closest I ever got to hate on a fic, I think, was someone left an overly personal and mentally disturbed comment on a chapter of my main fic that made me convinced they needed to seek therapy and deal with their own personal issues rather than take it out on a fanfic about animated ninjas. 

10. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Maybe 👀 I’m super vanilla when it comes to smut, though. I think the wildest thing I’ve ever written in smut is breeding kink. 

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, and I hope I never will. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet! I had someone ask to translate a one-shot of mine in Russian but I never got a response back when I laid out my terms and conditions. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not! I used to do paragraph-style roleplay which was kind of like cowriting fanfiction but writing is so personal and sacred to me that I don’t know if I could ever actually cowrite a fic with someone. I like brainstorming with other people, but writing for me is more of a deeply personal and independent endeavour. 

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Oh god, this is a tricky question because it depends on fandom. I absolutely love New Dream (Rapunzel x Eugene, Tangled) and have for the past ten years, and my love for them as only grown since watching Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure. I don’t write or even really read a ton of fanfiction for them, though. I’m also still highly dedicated to my favorite crossover crackship, Frostfield (Jack Frost x Violet Parr, Rise of the Guardians/The Incredibles) and to this day, if you search for that ship on AO3, I am the sole provider of every single fic about them so far. I’m not as active with them as I used to be, but they got me through some really rough times back in the day and still mean so much to me. A lot of my favorite ships across fandoms, though, are honestly canon x OC ships of mine because I am a self-indulgent bitch who needs to project. So Peter Pevensie x Eilonwy (The Chronicles of Narnia) and Kakashi Hatake x Rei Natsuki (Naruto) are really important to me and I’ve poured so much of myself specifically into their stories. I think it’s safe to say Kakashi and Rei is my all-time favorite ship across all fandoms, though, just because of how much their story means to me. The Scarecrow and The Bell is my magnum opus, my pride and joy, and I’m sure it will be my biggest fandom footprint of my entire life. I’ve dedicated the past three years to this story and these characters and I intend to continue doing it until it no longer brings me joy (which I hope it always will). There’s just so much I could say about this story and Kakashi and Rei’s relationship but I don’t think we have enough time or space in this post for that 😅 Just know that they mean the world to me and I will always hold them in the highest regard as a beautifully messy, flawed, passionate, soulmate-y ship that I love with all of my heart 🥺

EDIT: I also feel obligated to tack on some of my absolute favorite Naruto ships because I may not have written for all of them (yet) but they still make me unbelievably happy or I find them really compelling and enjoy the idea of exploring them: 

Naruhina is precious happy sunshine and The Last honestly felt like a wonderful Disney princess movie to me, it was so cute and the romance was so on-point, Naruhina just makes me so incredibly happy and I love them with all my heart. 

MinaKushi also gets me all up in my feels and I adore them with every fiber of my being. Their romance also gave me Disney princess movie vibes which I love, their story is just so damn sweet as is their character dynamic and I am still so heartbroken that they never got to be a happy family with Naruto because you know what? It’s what they deserved!

SasuSaku is so compelling to me and I really feel like we were cheated out of seeing their relationship develop and evolve postwar in the same way The Last did for Naruhina. They’re my favorite angst ship and while I don’t think they were written that well in canon, I love the possibility and potential of them together and am excited to explore them more in-depth in my own writing. 

NejiTen is just too cute, I really love the way Neji and Tenten’s personalities compliment each other? I don’t have much else to say about them except that I really love them together and think they have so much untapped potential that I also can’t wait to explore in more depth in my own writing. 

15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Paper Hearts and Impromptu Bookmarks, probably. I love the premise of this story a lot and I have so many interesting ideas for it but at the same time, it also feels kind of cheap and cringey to me, in a way? It takes all of these ideas I probably would have had if I had been into Naruto when I was a kid and kind of compiles them all into one big story. Kakashi and Aiko’s relationship and story is still really important to me and I want to continue it someday but for right now, I just haven’t had the motivation or desire to write any more of it. I think I’m just so overwhelmingly preoccupied with writing Kakashi and Rei’s story that I can’t imagine writing any other Kakashi x OC fics right now. 

16. What are your writing strengths?

I want to say that I’m really good at capturing complex emotion? I don’t know, I write a lot of angst and mental upheaval in my fics which can be really difficult to try and capture, but I think I do a decent enough job of it? And just writing difficult subjects in general. I think it’s really important to address difficult topics such as mental illness and relationship difficulties and everything but I also want to try and write those topics in a way that is both authentic to the experience while also still tasteful. I don’t want to drive readers away with heavy subject matter but rather present a situation that feels real and authentic while also still being digestible. I may not be doing a very good job of that during the current arc of my fic that I’m working on, but I’m trying haha

EDIT 2: I also want to add onto this to say that I’m really proud of my organizational techniques for writing longfic. It’s not necessarily a strength in terms of the prose itself but it’s something that’s taken me years to really get a grasp on and find a method that works perfectly for me and so far, it’s been extremely helpful and beneficial to me. I don’t know where I would be now as a writer without these essential tools in my pocket. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I feel like I do a really bad job of the “show, don’t tell” thing. It can be really hard to balance descriptive prose with straightforward writing that moves things along. I don’t want to dwell on mental dialogue to the point where you lose track of what’s going on, but I also don’t want my stuff to read like “Character A did xyz. Character B said abc. They went to 123″, whatever. Another thing I struggle with is sentence variation. I always fall into the same patterns when I’m writing prose and I get really self-conscious about it because I don’t want to sound repetitive or disrupt the flow of the writing. One of my favorite things about prose is focusing on the cadence of the words, I think it’s one of the most beautiful things about writing in general, but it can just be really difficult to get a good grip on that. I’ve been told in the past that I apparently have a really good grasp/control of the language or whatever but sometimes I just find that really hard to believe when I look at my work with such scrutiny. I think one of my biggest pet peeves with my own writing, too, is feeling like I start all of my sentences the same five different ways. I’ll read other people’s works and they’ll write sentences like “Glass-blue water lapped against the shores of a deserted beach as a lonely woman gazed off into the distance” and I can just never figure out how to realistically write sentences that start like that in the context of my prose and it drives me fucking crazy, like I’m definitely jealous  😅

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’ve never really thought much about it before, but I think there are pros and cons! For bilingual/multilingual readers, I think it can be a really enriching reading experience because they know what’s being said in both languages. For people who only know one language, however, unless a translation is provided, I feel like it can be really alienating. I think the best use of that for both worlds is using it as a means for miscommunication humor. Other than that, I think it can be a slippery slope that depends on what kind of reader you are and how it’s written. 

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The Chronicles of Narnia! My very first fanfiction was a Narnia fanfic that I barely remember except that it laid the basis for Temptation and my Narnia fanfic series as a whole. I never posted this first iteration anyway, but I remember it was 2008/2009 and I wrote a solid 80 pages (which was wild for me at the time) and had gotten halfway through remixing the events of Prince Caspian when my computer crashed and I lost absolutely everything. I’m still heartbroken that it’s gone forever, not because I’d want to go back and read it necessarily (since I’m sure it was actually hot garbage) but at least for nostalgia’s sake. Either way, like I said, this long-lost fic laid the basis for the very first fanfiction I ever posted, the first published (and never finished) iteration of Temptation back in 2011 on deviantART and the since-defunct Figment. I fell out of the fandom around 2012/2013 and left the story alone for a while before ultimately deciding to completely redux and rewrite the story when the fixation swung back around again between 2016 and 2018. 

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Despite the fact that it’s still in-progress, definitely The Scarecrow and The Bell. This fic just genuinely means so damn much to me and I will cherish it for the rest of my life because of how much it’s given me, how much love and passion and time and even parts of myself that I have poured into this, and also just how expansive of a story this is. Not only does it touch on some very dark and heavy topics, but I’ve also created so much of my own characters and meta for this story that it’s almost an entire universe in and of itself. I’ve just contributed so much additional world-building and created so many new OCs to fill important roles in this story and in Rei’s life, and they’ve all become so deeply important to me as they’ve developed further over the years. I’ve come up with so many interesting ideas for everyone and their lives, which are all slowly becoming so rich and varied. Not to mention that it’s my most popular fic to date as well as my longest fic at 632k and counting. I’ve really just genuinely poured so much of my heart and soul into this story, it’s my absolute favorite thing I’ve ever done and I really mean it when I say that I will cherish it for the rest of my life. 

[wajjs]

Blob’s tips for academic writing

aka how I tricked my professors into thinking I Know Shit (when I don’t)

First things first, and this a general disclaimer, I’m going to try and keep what I’m about to say in mostly general terms. This is because I’m aware regulations for written stuff in academic circles sometimes change not from college to college, but from country to country.

Anyways, I’m going to keep this simple.

Be clear and concise about your objectives, aka what you are planning to prove/explain with what you are writing.

Include in the very beginning (aka the first two paragraphs) what your objectives are. Be it to prove some bitch is totally biased in their research or to explain the connection between popular singers and sainthood, no matter what you are writing about, always try to start by saying what’s the shit you hope to get done.

This helps a lot with organization and also takes pressure off the whole aaaaa I don’t know how to start this, this is fucking hell, why am I in college, fuck my life thing we all go through.

When possible, start with a quote.

This is something I do a lot. Together with adding in the first paragraph my objectives, I always try to start with some funky quote that’s related to the topic at hand. I’ve quoted academic authors, song lyrics, fictional novels, comics, etc. If it works within the context, I’ve added it at the very start of things, right in between the title and the first paragraph with right margin indentation.

What this does is that it not only takes pressure off the beginning words, it also helps to put your work in context. It sets the mood. It also shows that you’ve been thinking about this so hard, that you’ve found ways to connect it with new things. But honestly that’s not necessarily true, I personally grab the first thing I can think of that sounds great considering the topic I’m working with.

(Sub)sections are your friends

Dividing your work in easily definable (and searchable) parts is a blessing. Not only does this help keep track of what you’ve said, it also helps the professors when they have to read it. Basically, it makes reading significantly easier for everyone involved.

You don’t have to go the boring route of Introduction / Analysis / Evidence / Conclusion. I mean, it IS best if you keep that Conclusion around because that’s kind of the most important thing among the others. I’ve handed in tons of research papers and essays with subsections titled after song lyrics or quotes from novels, etc. And guess what? Each time I’ve done that, my profs loved it.

Now, granted, maybe first try to get a general vibe of what your profs prefer, because some might not be down to party, but do keep this in mind. It shows individuality and personality. Yes, profs say you don’t gotta reinvent the wheel, but adding some color and sparkle is always nice, isn’t it?

Think of examples. Add as many as you can. Spread them all over.

If there’s one thing professors go bonkers for, that is examples. Even more so if they aren’t ones that have already been provided during class or within the textbooks/study materials. This doesn’t mean you must crack your head open trying to come up with something original: take the examples you already have as template!

You can still totally add those anyways. Just add examples. They are your friend and they add to the word count in times of need.

Text organizers

There are key words/phrases that organize the text and make it seem more concise. Things like:

For example / On the one hand / In conclusion / On the contrary / However / In addition to / As well as / Not only ... but also / Besides / To begin with / etc

are ways to organize your paragraph and sentences, and they help keep track of ideas and points you have made or need to make. I’ve found these have helped me a lot when I’ve had to cut my writing in between sentences (or in the middle of writing a sentence). They place you immediately in the tone you need to use and what you are doing in that section of the thing you’re writing.

Sentence structure

This is something that stands true both for academic writing and fiction: varying the length of your sentences is probably the best thing you can do to make reading easier.

Try not to have too many long sentences (aka, around 3 to 5 lines) one after the other. It slows down the rhythm and makes the thing seem convoluted. Shorten some of them into 2 or 3 sentences, add ones that are at most 2 lines long in between.

Another thing to keep in mind is the word order: SVO is the most common one, yet keeping it up throughout the entirety of the writing can make it seem repetitive or, what’s worst, straight up boring. Switch it up if you can!

Conclusion

Saving the best for last, and this is the golden rule: no new information can be added in the conclusion.

This section is specifically saved to tie up all the loose ends you can find throughout the analysis part of your writing. Everything that goes here MUST have already been talked about beforehand. The conclusion is there for you to explain whether you’ve met your objectives, if there’s need for further investigation (but the limits of the current work don’t let you carry it on, so it must be saved for a future date), if what you set out to prove was in fact wrong, etc.

If you add new information in the conclusion, and there is no way around this, then your analysis will be considered as wrong. You either take the new info out, or you find a way to include it in the previous sections.

All you have to do in this final section is summarize your points, talk about whether your hypothesis has been proved right or wrong, and tie up anything else that needs tying up. That’s it. Nothing less, nothing more.

Hopefully this will be helpful to anyone who might stumble upon this! I tried to keep it all in general terms lmao

Anyways, good luck my pals, don’t let academia kick you in the ass and disillusion you!

[rigelmejo]

this is gonna be just a mash of things this article made me think about - “why chinese is so damn hard”

In it, they wrote that:  At the end of three years of learning Chinese, I hadn't yet read a single complete novel.

Ok so. To be fair to them, one of the books they tried reading for pleasure (as in without a dictionary) was The Dream of the Red Chamber after 6 years of study. Which is like reading Shakespeare - its literary, its older, its fair if that is difficult especially for pleasure. (As in english speaking countries, we’ve been in school 9+ years before we’re asked to read Shakespeare and other classical type literary works).  

But back to focusing on the “end of three years” thing. 

When I started learning chinese, I was basically motivated by a person who wrote an article about how they looked at a little grammar, some radicals explanations, then brute forced 2000 common words memrise decks, then started reading with a click dictionary for pleasure. And it worked for them! And so, being me and very curious to ‘test’ if things work: I wanted to try it too. I did more prep work, more extra hanzi work than that article mentioned. And I don’t think it felt pleasurable with a click dictionary (I used pleco) for a while - but it was doable with a click-dictionary at that point so I do think that person who wrote the article was pretty honest about the progress they’d made. For me, and I think them if I remember correctly, that was around 8 months to start reading with a click dictionary. 

I read another article back in the middle of this, by Timo (who made Timo’s All in One Chinese anki deck), where he said he’d learned enough to pass HSK 4 in somewhere between 6 months to a year (I can’t remember exactly how long but it was a year or less). I think I covered all the HSK 4 words in memrise by 10 months, and probably felt comfortable with most of them around 14 months? And Now its been almost 2 years and if I were to take an HSK test that’s probably the one that I would pass with some study (I imagine I could try an HSK 5 one with some prep beforehand maybe?). HSK 4 is what I “aimed for” since I’d also read articles around that time of people saying that’s about when simple webnovels got “doable with a click dictionary” and when learning words FROM what you read started helping reading percent comprehension more than HSK. Which is a statement I agree with - I learned vocabulary mainly from reading after that point, and as a result it has definitely improved my reading comprehension and vocabulary (like it made Xiao Wang Zi pretty readable without dictionary etc, Zhen Hun is now readable without a dictionary, Daomubiji is), but these words I’ve picked up only matched maybe 50-70% with HSK 5-6 words (which is why I’d need to prep if I wanted to take an HSK 5 test probably).

So. I do think: if you WANT to read, if your GOAL is to read chinese novels? That is doable in 3 years. Certainly doable in 6. Especially if you are willing to study, and to read a LOT. 

General opinions I’ve found surrounding the topic of reading in Chinese include: reading through several books (10,000 pages) will help reading speed/ease, the more you read the easier (and faster) it gets. The more words you know, the easier it gets (WORDS not hanzi, and words generally being 5,000-15,000 for ease-feeling depending on your own tolerance for ambiguity). So basically: yes it will be super slow going at first, YES the speed will improve, yes you don’t need to dread not being able to pick up a book until X years into studying. I’ve seen people who started reading after 8 months (the guy who used a click dictionary who inspired me), or people that started after 1-3 years (me at around 1 year, a lot of people around HSK 4-6, a lot of people once they’ve learned 2k hanzi or 2k-5k words etc). 

I personally noticed a page used to take me 30 minutes... then 20... then 15... then 5... now a bit under 5 minutes (and ‘easier’ books less time). So reading speed will eventually get better. Mine still has some improvements that need to be reached eventually lol. I can say at about 1500 hanzi reading and picking up hanzi IN reading (provided you have an audiobook or click-dictionary with audio to hear the hanzi sound) seemed to start working pretty well. So I do think 2000 hanzi is actually a fair estimate of ‘reading will get doable without a dictionary by then.’ I may be around 2000 hanzi known now, and most of the time the hanzi I see are either brand new words (which I SHOULD learn) or part of descriptions/similar words to things I know and I can guess (and with audio also learn them). Hanzi have gotten easier to guess now, to remember, to make connections with.

My point is just that if you want to read - read early, read often, you do not need to be afraid it’s impossible. 

There are people who got into reading way faster than me, people who did much slower. And also tolerance of ambiguity is a big deal - I do think chinese requires more tolerance of ambiguity when making the transition to reading native content (versus learner materials and graded readers) since there’s unknown hanzi you won’t be able to avoid. I’ve got a pretty high tolerance, but yeah there might be ‘slogging’ for a while depending on where your tolerance level is. If you can comprehend the ‘overall main idea’ of paragraphs, sentences? You can understand it enough to learn from it (though how ‘draining’ it will feel will depend on difficulty of the reading and your own tolerance for ambiguity). I saw one translator estimate 3-4 years to read webnovels for pleasure (so no dictionary necessary) and I think that’s a pretty fair estimate (if you’re studying regularly, trying to practice reading with graded readers and click-dictionaries). I’m at almost 2 years and some webnovels I can read for pleasure without a dictionary, many feel better with one but somewhat doable without one, and some I slog through even with a dictionary. I think 3-4 years is a pretty good estimate if you’re studying regularly. 

My other main thought is just... oh man. Reading that someone did not complete their first chinese novel in 3 years MAKES me want to finish a chinese novel before August (that’s my 2 year mark -3-)! I mean technically I finished Xiao Wangzi and a Xiao Mao book but those are both for children and quite short. But yeah nothing motivates me like a challenge to see if something is doable or not...

Somewhat related to this, but I got a new version of Zhen Hun recently (the traditional character version because the covers are SO freaking lovely). And it seems to match up to the webnovel chapters?? So unlike my simplified copy, this one doesn’t have extra scenes and changed scenes and added details in each chapter. I only skimmed (and its chapters are broken up differently than the webnovel which is pretty normal) so I’m not sure if my traditional version has the extras or Shen San extra (my simplified copy does). It does not have the Kunlun prologue my simplified copy has. But, since this traditional copy matches up to the webnovel pretty close (just a few wording changes like next/then/after etc), I could read it very easy! It’s my first time reading traditional chinese in longer novel form since MoDu or The MDZS, so its cool seeing my progress from 6 months in to now. 

[eliteprepsat]

The concept of having a work-life balance refers to maintaining an equilibrium between one’s career and personal responsibilities. In a world focused just as much on our successes and upward mobility as it is on our mental health, achieving such a work-life balance has been the topic of much discussion in recent years. Companies have even gone to great lengths to create funded initiatives to ensure their employees have the best work-life balance possible. More balanced individuals are more productive employees, after all.

Unfortunately, though, when you’re in high school and college no such initiatives exist. Nonetheless, students share the same experience of competing pressures from both school and life. As a student today, one might even argue that a school-life balance is often more difficult to attain due to increasing demands placed on young people to achieve. But, the same holds true here as in the workplace: More balanced students are more productive students.

With this in mind, below are 8 tips for helping you reach a healthier school-life balance. If you practice these tips now, making them second nature, they will follow you into college and beyond into your career.

1. Set boundaries

With the amount of work that high school course schedules demand of us, it can become easy to give our entire lives over to them. While the hope is that such studiousness will eventually lead to great success, working so hard all of the time can actually be harmful.

Therefore, it’s important to establish boundaries when it comes to our school work.

Boundaries help to ensure that we don’t give all of our time to studying, but that we also leave room for other activities that we enjoy. This “down time” refreshes our bodies and minds, actually allowing us to be more productive when we do return to our school work.

To begin working within boundaries, study diligently throughout the week, but (if possible) take at least one day off from school work per week to do the things you especially enjoy. If you’re not in a position to take an entire day off from school work, try to leave at least a portion of one day free for enjoyable activities. During these designated “times off,” allow yourself the luxury of not even thinking about your school work at all.

On days that you do work, be sure to schedule in breaks. Rather than take work breaks at random, utilize the Pomodoro Method, which is a great approach for ensuring productivity without burnout. In this method, a series of timers are set to track periods of work followed by shorter periods of rest. There are many free Pomodoro Method timers online, but this one is especially handy (and cute!).

2. Focus on time management by establishing priorities and setting goals

You likely won’t be able to finish your entire research project today (at least not well!). But, you can plan to finish the last chapter of your chosen novel today, research the author’s life tomorrow, and begin writing your introductory paragraph the next day.

The point here is that when you procrastinate and then set out to complete an entire task in one sitting, that task is often overwhelming. But when you pace yourself by setting manageable tasks that you can complete incrementally, that same project doesn’t feel so insurmountable.

To help with time management, create a to-do list, placing tasks of highest priority at the top of the list and working your way down to tasks of lowest priority. If you’re a visual person, write these individual tasks out on stickie notes that you can crumple up and throw away once each one has been completed. Physicalizing your accomplishments in this way brings a sense of accomplishment that simply crossing items out on a list does not.

3. Then, reward yourself when you reach your goals

Beyond the implicit reward of simply accomplishing tasks, plan explicit rewards to accompany each of your set goals. Whether it’s with a break, a piece of chocolate, or an episode of your favorite show, treat yourself when you achieve a set goal on your to-do list.

Your goals needn’t be extravagant in every case in order to warrant a reward, either. Have you read 20 pages of your book? Put the finishing touches on your science project? Let the reward match the achievement. Whatever the case, it always helps to have something to look forward to!

4. Practice mindfulness by powering-down

The masses have long praised the idea of multitasking. Yet, we live in a time when this approach to productivity is being questioned. In fact, more recent research points to multitasking’s leading to negative effects, including increased stress and decreased cognitive functioning.

What’s recommended instead of multitasking is that you give your full attention to one task at a time. In other words, what’s recommended is that you practice mindfulness while at work.

In this article, Matt Tenney, author of The Mindfulness Edge, explains four ways that mindfulness improves productivity—including eliminating distractions and producing stronger work—by supporting his claims with evidence from an array of university studies.

One way to practice mindfulness while studying is to “unplug” by taking a break from technology. Reducing internet distractions—such as texting, social media, and even Google—can have real gains on your productivity.

5. Say goodbye to baggage

We are often reminded of the importance of extracurricular activities, especially when it comes to college admissions. Since this is the case, we tend to become involved in many extracurriculars, or we become so deeply invested in the few extracurriculars we’ve chosen that it seems they’ve taken precedence over our school work—and have even taken over our lives!

The important thing to remember is that extracurriculars are beneficial. But, they are only beneficial if they are enhancing and not draining your life.

So, do an inventory. If any of your extracurricular activities seem to be more of a drain on your time and energy than an enhancement to your current happiness and potential future success, drop them from your schedule. Place this saved time and energy into the activities you are benefiting from, and you will likely see an improvement in these areas.

6. Upgrade your study hour

Another way to improve your school-life balance is to simply find a way to enjoy the school part of the equation more. This may seem like wishful thinking; but, if you can think of your studies less as work and more as play, then you are sure to approach this time with more balance.

So, what helps you get through hours of reading or studying for exams? Listening to your favorite music? Having your favorite latte by your side? Working with a big group of your best friends? Taking your work outside to the park or to the beach? Whatever the case may be, do yourself a favor by making study hour more enjoyable for yourself. This way, you will be less hardwired to dread your time spent hitting the books.

And if a place like the park or beach isn’t easily accessible to you, check out our previous article on Creating a Great Study Space.

7. Lean on your support system

When in doubt, don’t be afraid to ask for help—from friends, family, and teachers/other mentors. It can be helpful just to have friends and family who simply understand what you’re going through with the heavy workload of school. A shoulder to lean on and an ear to confide in can go a long way toward relieving stress. And a best buddy or an understanding parent can also be key to getting you out of the house (and out of your head!) after a particularly long and grueling study session.

Teachers/mentors, on the other hand, can provide more “practical” solutions for helping to alleviate the worry from school work. Whether by suggesting additional reading, offering personally-tailored study tips, or pointing you in the direction of helpful tutors like those at Elite, these trusted adults can be a great resource in your search for a better school-life balance.

8. Practice self-care by forgetting “perfection”

As modern students with such big workloads, it can become easy to neglect our own self-care. However, whatever this phrase (“self-care”) means to you—be it physical, mental, or emotional preservation—it’s important to maintain the practice even (and especially!) when a school-life balance seems the most difficult to achieve.

Forms of self-care are as numbered and unique as the people on Earth. You know what works best for you. But one thing is universal: To practice better self-care, try letting go of your belief in “perfection.”

In a time when social media has us constantly comparing ourselves to others, and life goals such as college admissions are increasingly competitive, it makes sense to dot every “i” and cross every t”—just maybe not 9 times.

Reaching for what you deem as “perfection” isn’t always beneficial. This is because reaching “perfection” isn’t always possible. Shoot for your best instead, and you are likely to feel more satisfied and balanced in the end.

Stacy G. is a writer and teacher who has taught composition, literature, and creative writing courses at a number of public and private universities across the U.S. She has also taught SAT, AP English, and Literature SAT Subject Test courses at Elite Prep. She likes poetry, dogs, and poetry about dogs.

[isthatbloodonhisshirt]

If you could change ten things about Teen Wolf what would you change??

OMG BUCKLE DOWN BECAUSE IT’S GONNA BE A LONG ONE! Do asks have a word limit? Guess we gonna find out! (Sometimes I wish I could speak these replies, they sound much funnier when I am speaking out loud to myself and then they are just weird and flat typed up but I DIGRESS! I do that a lot, have you noticed? Doesn’t matter.)

(Also, I did put a “Keep Reading” but for some reason it’s not working. Or it’s not showing as working on my end. But it’s right under this paragraph I swear so if it’s not working, that isn’t on me....)

1) SO! Trauma. People be dealing with their traumas. That’d be a thing I’d like, thank you. Like, I’m sorry, but there is a fuckton of trauma in this show and everyone like, goes to bed at night and wakes up cured. Like MAGIC! I mean, yes, I get that magic is a thing in the show (is it? I mean kind of? Idk, I never saw past season 4, they alluded to magic and then SNATCHED THAT AWAY so, side-note, that’s coming up later!) But yes, I would’ve very much liked for people to, you know, deal with their traumas in a realistic fashion. Let’s get some therapy going, or like, idk, some actual negative reactions to thing! They kind of had that with Stiles every now and then, but he seemed to be up and down episode to episode so like, it’d be like they wrote an episode where he reacts to what happened to him and then four episodes have gone by where he’s fine and the writers were like “OH YEAH SHIT HE JUST MURDERED LIKE A WHOLE HOSPITAL, make him have a panic attack randomly over dropping milk, that balances out, excellent, we’re so smart.” So yes. DEAL. WITH. THE. TRAUMA! Thanks.

2) LESS CHARACTERS, MORE DEVELOPMENT! I mentioned this in another recent ask about relationships but like, they just kept shoving characters in there. Like one of those clown cars. So we got like, 30% character development on the core group and then the rest was like “wait, who are you again?” Like, legit, I have a bad memory, you put too many people in front of me, I ain’t gonna remember them unless they have a good personality or a reason to be there. And like, develop their relationships! Not even romantically, but like, Scott’s mom loves Scott, that is sweet and lovely, but like, we never really… see… that… developed? Idk man, like again, I have a bad memory, but when you really develop relationships WELL (ex: Brooklyn-nine-nine), that shit sticks with you and you CARE about people. The friendships are important, and the familial relationships are important and just developing all the dynamics is important! They spent more time showcasing how much everyone hated each other and lied to each other and stuff and that just got really tiring. Yes, you’re allowed to get mad at your friends, but if you’re a Werewolf, and your human friend is calling you when there is a fucking monster running around killing people, can you maybe stop making out with your girlfriend and answer your phone so your friend isn’t treading water with a 200+ pound Werewolf for 2 hours? Like, JUST SAYING! (Spoiler alert: Me and Scott would not be close friends. Like, I think we’d be friends, but not so much that I’d trust him with my life. If I wanted to grab pizza and a movie, maybe play some video games, he sounds like a treat, but if my life was in danger, thanks I be callin’ someone who answers their phone).

3) Actual consequences for their actions! Okay like, I am also guilty of this in fanfic, but at the same time, my writing is free, I don’t get paid for it, and I write what I want because that’s how it works, so I can do whatever I please (If I wanna make the Hales royalty for the millionth time, ain’t nobody gonna stop me!). But like, when you are a legit paid screenwriter who is writing a show? Consequences! Just because it’s a show about Werewolves doesn’t mean there can’t be any consequences! Like, the best scene, and I feel like we can agree, because fuck it like, hurt my soul and my heart and I was just so like ;~; was when the sheriff got fired (fired? suspended? TEMPORARILY UNEMPLOYED!) because Stiles stole a police van when they locked Jackson up in it. Like, that shit was REAL LIFE CONSEQUENCES for actions, and that shit was intense and it HURT and omg I loved it! Give me more of that! Like, I’m sorry, but you gonna tell me Nogistune!Stiles walked through the hospital murdering a bazillion people and not one camera was working the whole time? Not one? Nobody saw that? Nobody went “hey, isn’t that the sheriff’s kid?” Like, CAN. YOU. IMAGINE?! That would’ve been so amazing, a bunch of episodes of the pack scrambling to keep the Supernatural a secret while also trying to stop Stiles from GETTING ARRESTED because saying “Sorry ma’am, I was possessed by a demon fox who likes chaos and thought murdering a bunch of people would be fun” ain’t gonna fly in court and the FBI sure isn’t gonna believe that but like, UGH! Again, bad memory, but was the fact that Dark!Stiles wandered through the hospital killing people EVER brought up again???? CONSEQUENCES. Woulda really liked that.

4) STOP with unnecessary romances. Like, yeah, I get it, the allos like their romances, but shockingly, you can still have a good show without focussing on the romance. Like, it can be there, I’m not saying don’t put it in, I’m saying DON’T MAKE IT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING! Like, the entirety of season one was Scott chasing Allison and Stiles chasing Lydia. This… this does not make an interesting show? Like, is that just me? And then as the season progressed, EVERYONE had to be in a relationship? WHY? Again, haven’t seen past season four, but I mean, I know Scott and Kira were a thing, and then Stiles and Malia, and Liam and some… person? Idk. And Ethan and Danny (congrats Jeff, you get to tick your “I had representation in my show!” box, well done, gold star, or whatever). And Isaac and Allison, and Melissa and Chris (apparently?). And then Stydia was alluded as being canon, and Scott ended up with Malia somehow?? And Derek slept with half the town and all of Mexico, idek. Like, stop it. Stop. Shows work without everything being about everyone banging each other. (See again: Brooklyn-nine-nine, or Avatar the Last Airbender, or The Good Place, or even fucking Supernatural!) You can have a good, interesting story without everyone banging each other. It ain’t necessary.

5) More actual storytelling (again, this woulda worked better without the unnecessary romances taking up 49 of the 50 minutes of air-time). Like, yes, I get it, pilot’s gotta have some pizzaz! Gotta be spicy and sparkly to make people interested (and like, fucking hell, all I can remember of the pilot is sobbing Allison soaking wet–LIKE, WAS THAT NECESSARY???–about the dog she hit and oh noes is it dead well thank God the lead character works for a vet! And somehow has keys and access to the whole clinic like nbd at all hours? Whatever. I wasn’t even allowed inside my blockbuster as a shift lead if it was off-hours but apparently a high school student doing paperwork at a vet clinic is different, I’m not a vet so what do I know? I HAD A BAD DAY OKAY, I GOT FEELINGS ABOUT THIS RN!) I went off-topic, what was I saying? Oh yes, storytelling. You know what woulda been nice? Werewolves! It happens, we find out about Laura, we find out about Werewolves, Scott gets bitten, all that jazz. And then like… ease in the Hunters? Like, why was there Laura/Derek, Peter, AND the Hunters all crammed into the pilot? Yes, I get it, you need the SUSPENSE and the DRAMA, but you can do that without the Hunters right off the bat. Just, how CONVENIENT~ that the same day Derek and Laura come back, Hunters move to town? That’s just lazy, and again, I can be guilty of laziness, I admit to it, but I literally get paid in—like, do hearts count? I get paid in hearts and pats on the back for my fics, I can write whatever I want. If you’re getting paid to write something, try a bit harder, yes? Yes???

What number am I on? Oh good Lord, I got things to say, okay.

6) MAGIC! Can you like—I feel like this one is self-explanatory. Stiles did the whole mountain ash thing in season one, and it was SO PROMISING, and then that just died. It died like Maes Hughes getting shot in a phonebooth (spoiler, but really, you haven’t seen that yet, that’s a you problem). Why even bother introducing magic if you weren’t gonna use it? Like, was it because people like Stiles more than Scott and the showrunner was like “nonono. If we make him magic, he’s TOO cool, and then Scott is unimportant.” I mean, you coulda worked that in your favour, but no. You just murdered the fuck out of it, like straight up took it out back and shot it. Like, yeah, Derek went kiddo again and Jennifer was apparently all magic beauty spell or whatever, but like?? That’s it??? You had a show about Werewolves and you didn’t even try to make it more interesting by making some of the characters magic? Lydia’s basically the closest and they didn’t even explain her powers that well. Magic would’ve been dope and they totally shoved that to the side. That was dumb. Shoulda done something with that.

7) Explain things more? Don’t mention them once and then do nothing? Like, we got some brief stuff about anchors, and emissaries (which are super duper secret according to Deaton but then like, EVERYONE KNOWS HE IS EMISSARY SO WHICH IS IT DEATON? YOU TELL ME!) Like, they had so much opportunity to talk about so many things and again, maybe that comes out more in the later seasons, idk, but they likely coulda done with more explanations and they didn’t and this angers me GREATLY. They mention something once and then it never comes up again. That’s some Lost bullshit right there. Don’t start something if you’re not gonna commit. You tell me the beginning of the story, I wanna fucking know the end, don’t forget halfway through and wander away, that ain’t right, I NEED ANSWERS JEFF! And like, as above, never really got Lydia’s powers. I know what a Banshee is, but her powers did NOT make sense to me. Idk, could just be that I’m dumb, but similarly, don’t write something so convoluted that it confuses people, that is also dumb. As dumb as I am so like, well done there. And also do we get more on Parrish? I know he’s a Hellhound, but how does one get born a Hellhound and not know until you are conveniently lit on fire by someone trying to kill you for money? (Also, you bean, you absolute treasure, “I’m worth five dollars?” You’re so cute. Silly child.) I feel like being a Hellhound is something that woulda come up before getting barbecued in his cruiser. Like, he works a stressful job, you gonna tell me not ONCE while getting shot at he didn’t have a massive heart attack over a close call and like, burst into flames? No? Is that just a me thing? I feel like the slightest annoyance and I’d be fully on fire, not gonna lie. (I’d be on fire a LOT… CLEARLY I AM AN ANGRY PERSON! No, that’s not true. No yes it is, I am angry, but more angry lately because I’m sleep-deprived and work is dumb ANYWAY back to this)

8) EMBRACE THE SIDE CHARACTERS! Okay, so MAYBE Scott is meant to be the golden child. The Dick Grayson of the show, if you will. The original Robin, the creme de la creme. That’s all fine and dandy if he is, no judgement (little judgement), but you know what you don’t do when your side characters are getting a lot of attention and love? What you DO NOT do is give them less screen time. Because then you’re being petty and, shockingly, you get more positive results when you give the fans what they want. I’m not talking about pairings, because everyone is different, and you can’t cater to everyone, but like, the more people moved away from liking Scott, the harder the showrunners pushed him into our faces. And like, that isn’t how this works. If I like side character 87 a lot, and the lead’s getting annoying, you know what’s gonna make me NOT watch the show? Cutting out side character 87 (hey, for shits and gigs, let’s call him DANNY, just, not coincidentally at all) and then just shoving the lead into my face. That is what makes someone go “Well, four seasons is enough, I can happily live knowing I didn’t waste my life watching two more of them.” Like??? I’m not saying cut out Scott, because the show is ABOUT Scott, but the more everyone tried to showcase how amazing and wonderful and pure and perfect he was, the more annoying it got? Like, Scott has flaws. THEY ALL HAVE FLAWS! If you don’t admit that they all have flaws, it gets boring, and you hate the characters. I know that Scott turned into a douche later (apparently, again, haven’t seen it), but even in the early seasons by trying to make him this pure True Alpha golden angel child who spreads love and hope and trusts everyone, it just got boring. He was vanilla, and also a bad friend, because he was too “perfect” to be around someone “imperfect” like Stiles, and even like, the rest of the pack overall. He was always put on a pedestal and it made the show really… irksome? Idk, I just feel like yes, SCOTT is the Teen Wolf, but you added all these damn side characters, maybe use them a bit more? At least Stiles was interesting, and Lydia was fucking badass, and fucking hell, if you’d done right by Boyd and Erica, the actors wouldn’t have left for better shows so like, come on man, you coulda done better. We coulda had such a dope show, why you gotta crush my dreams like that Jeff? What did I ever do to you?

I know this is only eight, but this is long enough, if I go two more, this is gonna be IN.SANE. And also it’s late and I haven’t finished my fic for the day (I mean, I’m almost done, but I’m not done yet!) So like, I’ma stop here. But yes, hopefully this answered your question. Sorry I got REALLY PASSIONATE about it but it’s been a day.

Also, I feel this needs to be said, but obviously these are my own personal opinions, and as opinions, you are not obligated to agree with them. But you are also not allowed to tell me my opinion is wrong. You can disagree with it, but this is an opinion, not a law, so there is no right and wrong. Don’t @ me, my day’s been bad enough kthx!

HAVE A GOOD NIGHT, BE BACK IN LIKE TWENTY(?) MINUTES!

[writing-with-olive]

How to write a five paragraph essay

This is going to be my third and last of these posts, unless people have questions that arise from them (at which point I am more than happy to make more - just let me know!) You can find my post about writing thesis statements here, and my post on essay conclusions here (both imbedded). Unlike my previous posts, this is going more in-depth about five paragraph essays, though I imagine you can take the tips here and apply them elsewhere. 

Alrighty guys. Strap in because this one’s gonna be a bit long.

1) Prewriting

Okay. Since I hate prewriting as a concept (seriously. You do all this work and you don’t have any essay to show for it? what is this?), I tend to keep it pretty short and sweet, but it is necessary. 

What do do?

Read through your source material, and get an understanding of what you’re going to argue about

As you’re reading, make sure you write down your sources or else doing your bibliography is going to be a pain (just copy/pasting urls should suffice at this point)

Create an argument (generally, what is the point you’re trying to get across)

Write your thesis. It’s important that you do this AFTER reading the material, as you won’t know what to argue if you come up with a thesis before doing the reading. Constructing your thesis is also important to do before you actually get to writing, as it informs a lot of the structure of the essay. For more info on how to construct a thesis, I made this post as part of this mini series not too long ago (same link as above). 

Outline your essay. This can be detailed if you like it like that, or it can just be a few words for each paragraph. As I personally find outlines to be both necessary and a pain, I tend to go with the latter of the two (described further in the example below). However, experiement with both - some people work better when they have detailed outlines with all of their sources and arguments listed under each paragraph heading.

How to outline

(How to outline, as well as how to write the intro paragraph, body paragraphs, a link to how to write conclusion paragraphs, and general tips all under the cut)

As you may have guessed, there are a number of ways to outline. The most basic looks like this:

Paragraph 1: Intro Paragraph 2: [insert topic 1] Paragraph 3: [insert topic 2] Paragraph 4: [insert topic 3] Paragraph 5: Conclusion

From here, you can make things more and more detailed if you like. Some common things people put in outlines are:

evidence presented

points made

relevant sources for each paragraph

their topic sentence

etc...

My advice is to play around and see what works best for you. If you’re like me and really really hate prewriting, you may go with a simpler approach. Or, if you find drafting to be hell on earth, maybe put more time into prewriting to make drafting faster.

2) Introduction

This is arguably the most important part of your essay (at least, that’s what my middle school teachers always said). The common difficulty is that everyone seems to be saying how important it is, and how cructial it is, and how [insert synonym for important and crutial] it is, and all that jazz. Which means after a twenty minute lecture of WHY you should write an introduction, there never seems to be enough time to teach people how to actually WRITE it. 

Here’s the thing. The point of your intro is to ease your reader into the topic. You don’t want to blind side them with something hyperspecific out of the blue. At the same time, you don’t want them to loose interest because you’re taking too long. 

The trick is to use the funnel method.

It works like this: each sentence is a layer, and how wide the funnel is represents how broad your statement is. Your first statement is going to be huge - something that encompases a lot. Each sentence should encompass less and less, until you get to your thesis, which is very narrow. 

A formula I frequently use (depending on if it’s applicable) is:

Intro: Sentence about humanity as a whole (establishes basic concept)

NS 1: Sentence that establishes that Intro thing applies to certain time/place (establishes the what/where)

NS 2: Sentence that specifies how, exactly, Intro thing applies to time/place (establishes how)

NS 3: Sentence that specifies relevant groups within this time and place

Thesis: the specific thing I am arguing. 

In this (very generic, and also very fake) example, I’m going to bold every other sentence so they are easy to distinguish from one another. It’s the same pattern featured above.

Conflict is one of the universal truths of life. Throughout the ages, individuals and groups have found themselves on opposing sides of a disagreement, but few could compare to the 1789 B.C. Battle of the Frogs in what is now modern-day Tatooine. Dissention had been brewing for years, but when the Narnians finally stole all of native unicorns, the civillians of the sandy outer-rim planet finally hit a tipping point; they were prepared to sacrifice anything if it meant being free. Despite the epic proportions of the Battle, a few individuals were able to record the events of the conflict in journals that have survived to this day. In his journal “Of life on the Desert,” Percy Jackson describes the effects of war, including the impact it had on his family, his work, and the state of his village.

3) Body Paragraphs

These three paragraphs are where you will be backing up your thesis statement. This is a fair bit of space, to work with if you do it right, but it’s also not a lot of space, so you do have to make sure to use it wisely. An easy way to make sure you’re doing this right is to.....

Follow yet MORE paragraph formulas

(yay!)

Seriously though. Using formulas in your essays will set you free, and it makes it look like you know what you’re doing.

Sentence 1: Topic Sentence

This is usually going to start out with some kind of transition phrase such as “in addition to [previous thing]” or whatever. Then it’s going to introduce the thing you’re actually going to talk about in this paragraph.

Sentence 2 - Second to Last: Evidence and Analysis

For each paragraph, you’re probably going to want between three and four pieces of evidence (as two looks like there’s not actually solid evidence, and five becomes tedious). 

For this structure, you’re going to want to spend a sentence introducing a piece of evidence, making sure to include the proper in-text citations (which I am not going to cover here, but I can cover in another post if someone asks me to). 

After your evidence citation, you’re going to want to write at least one or two sentences of analysis, either picking apart just that piece of evidence, or linking that evidence to other pieces of evidence. For beginners, many teachers will expect about one line of analysis, from about sophomore year of highschool up, teachers begin to expect two or more. 

Make sure that your evidence and analysis flows together - that is, organize your evidence into a logical order, and use transition words (there’s huge lists out there - google is your friend) to go from an analysis sentence to another piece of evidence. 

Sentence 3 - Conclusion Sentence

This is one of the harder sentences to nail, but the idea is that you want to restate what your topic sentence is.

If you can’t think of a good conclusion sentence, you can write a transition sentence instead, and on the topic sentence of your next paragraph, leave off the transition. 

4) Conclusions

I already did a post on conclusions, which is linked here (imbedded). 

5) Miscellaneous Tips!

Never use “you” statements. This is because you can never be sure of your reader’s background, so it wrecks some of the credibility of your argument! If you’re describing something and you feel a burning urge to write “you might do X” or something along those lines, switch “you” out for the word “one”

Similarly, never use I statements. They make things look like opinions rather than facts. NOT GOOD. A good fix is to not use personal experiences that would force you to use I statements (unless explicitely asked to), and to cut off all phrases such as “I think” or “I researched.” These are implied, and you make your argument look stronger without them.

Avoid using the word “that.” If you can cut it out and the sentence still makes sense, cut it. It’ll make your narrative voice stronger.

If you need to make your essay look longer, find places where paragraphs end at the end of a line. Then, throughout the paragraph, un-abbreviate words that can be sensably un-abbreviated. This will push a few words onto the next line and give the apperance of a longer essay. 

Similarly, if you want your essay to appear shorter (if you have a page limit or something), look for places where a paragraph just barely makes it onto a new line, and cut extra words so that the words move back until that new line isn’t there.

Keep track of all new sources as you go - it saves so much time.

Make in-text citations as you go, rather than trying to put them in after the fact. 

Run spell check before turning in your work

Make sure your grammar is correct, and understand how to use colons and semi-colons (they will save your life)

Now, here are 1000 awesome points for reading until the end, and good luck with your essay!

[signofwolf]

Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J. Maas – book review

Series: Throne of Glass #7 Genre: YA, Fantasy Theme: Fae, magic users, war Warnings: mentions of torture, imprisonment Star rating: 0,5/10

Why did I pick this up?: I wanted to end this horrible series once and for all.

[Heavy spoilers ahead]

To make myself clear, before this book I quite liked this series. It wouldn’t place in my top 100 books, not even close, but it was a pleasant pageturner to listen to in audiobooks when working.

Language

Let’s start slow. I lack the words to express how much I hate the words ‘male’, ‘female’ and ‘mate’ after this series. Not even gonna try to express my trauma. But these 3 gems aside, Sarah J. Maas needs a dictionary. Or compress her work to a manageable size. Everything sang, Everyone melted, Every man roared, Every woman trembled, Everyone was unleashing themselves at least once a chapter (number of chapters: 122) ). And now I know definitely too much about Yrene’s ‘womb’. I know so much…

Dynamism

I thought that was a book about a war with heavy action content. Oh boy, I was wrong. This 984-pages monstrosity has maybe 5 pages of action. If you squint.

Every sequence, where by design action should take place was followed by one of two scripts:

Few sentences of action and then a few pages long internal monologue. Often repeated with the same character after the next few sentences of action, or with the next character and then the next (sometimes the first character made a second appearance and then everything would go all over again). And the word ‘character’ used in these sentences is not because I’m rambling. This book is written that way!

Few sentences of action and then action stops, and we are graced by a few pages long conversation. In the middle of a battle. Or spying. Or in Erawan’s chambers, when his castle is going down, and he is running up the stairs...

Time

Leaving alone the fact that apparently all series took less than a year (till this book I estimated the plot for about 3 years, Wiki told me it was 2, but Maas knows best), because that is a can of worms in itself. Time in this one? I honestly have no idea. There were many ‘few weeks of travel’ parts with two main groups of POVs. Personally my only time indicator was ‘Orynth won’t fall till Aelin gets here’. But nothing just fit. And I saw Lost Song when in the last episode we as the audience realized that our two POVs parallel storylines are in reality millennia apart. Lost Song made sense.

Emotional loading

… there wasn’t any. Really, it was like reading a milk label. Every time the scene was potentially emotionally impactful, Maas went ahead to overexplaining EVERY. GOD. DAMMED. THING. And it was abso-fucking-lutely everything. ‘Emotional dilemma? Let’s current POV explain it! 2 pages should be enough… Damn maybe it wasn’t enough. I know! I’ll switch POVs and explain it through the other character!’ <= My impression of Maas’ thought process. I’m fairly sure that the record was 7 POVs explaining the same thing in the row, but I was blacking out a little, so I cannot be sure.

And if that wasn’t enough, this book had a second way to defuse tension: random-plastic-repetitive-badly_written-smut. Really badly written and really repetitive. How could you not feel the spicy bits, when Manon (cruel, self assured 100+years old witch-queen) reacts the same in bed as Elide (20years old, virgin, ex-slave). And the rest of them were the same, there weren’t ANY distinctions.Just copy-paste.

The next point in current case: Someone died, it was impactful, I really liked the character, so I got sad. But then 2 of our characters came out of the room with a body, and after a paragraph of grieving they started making out, and then I was regaled with 2-pages-long description of melting cores. That was the place then this book stopped being badly written, and started being distasteful.

Characters

Remember when I was writing about switching POVs (which is 15(!!!) In the whole book. Oh and an omniscient narrator in places when our current POV was grieving too much to overthink something, but Maas still wanted to inform us about something)? They were all savagely murdered in the worst way: character mutilation. Somewhere between books our maybe-not-that-original but colorful and interesting characters became carbon copies of each other. I have no idea how many times I didn’t realise there was a POV switch. The only indicator was a change of pronoun, or when Maas was telling us the name of a current narrator. These were the only ways. And if you can't distinguish if you are in Dorian’s head or in Manon’s, that is the sign of a really BAD writing.

Romance

…there wasn't any. In all this book there wasn't any naturally progressing romantic scene. There were Maas’ endgame pairings which were sexing or pinning. As the author Maas loves to write about soulmates. And it’s not a bad thing itself. When I want some fluffy story I often tag ‘soulmates’ in AO3 and voila, +10 to good mood. But God above, it is not cute when every pair you write about are ‘true mates’ just BECAUSE. It is the only way Maas sees a relationship, as a fated pairing, written in the wake of the universe by the God himself. There is no choice, nor the work to put in it. They are the author's OTP and that means that they are perfect and they should have children right now. Point in case:

Guy was treating a girl like a shit on his sole, including throwing her naked out of tent, on a snow, with their friends present, all the while abusing her verbally in a worst way. But it’s okay, because when she almost died he realised his mistakes and apologised. Two scenes later, he was forgiven, because... fated mates?

The pathos

I know that many people don't like this type of scenes, but it's not my case. I’m reading by picturing images and not repeating words. I like sequences that I can imagine to be grand and glorious, even if they are a little corny. That said, the pathos scenes were the most disappointing ones for me. Maas likes to write parts that are more picturesquely exalted than logically possible [point in case: meeting of 5 armies/forces in the random patch of sand in Empire of Storms, and it being painted as ‘an Aelin’s great plan’. I laughed myself silly at that. But not taking logic and all the plot holes into consideration that was a nicely looking scene. In Kingdom of Ash that wasn’t the case. I would say that the author wanted to paint us a renaissance painting every 20 pages or so. In my opinion, every time she failed miserably. Each and every of those scenes was or to farfetched to be even remotely realistic, and evidently written only for a sake of the picture, or just plainly stupid.

Example, and it’s so priceless a scene, that I just need to share it: Battle of Orynth, 25th day or so (time in this book doesn’t exist), the 13. sacrificed themselves (like thousands before them but hush). And then, time stops: grieving Manon is going through the city, they open the gates for her (yes, the siege is still on), she goes to the place where they died, after her come out all of our main heroes, and half the city itself with ‘flowers, rocks and precious possessions’ and they lay it there in a tribute to these brave (evil till 2 months ago) witches. I honestly can’t remember when was the last time I saw such an abstract scene. It’s a material for an essay in itself. No, I could not take it seriously.

Additionally, it's hard to make an impact as every damn sentence is grand and lofty. In the end it became truly pathetic, Aelin vs Maeve was unreadable.

Character deaths:

Let's make a quick count: main characters in a series at the start of KoA: 12 secondary characters in a series at the start of KoA: 20ish minor and total background: a lot more

Death count: main: 0 secondary: 3 minor: 2 (11 if we try very hard)

Resurrections: 1 (possibly 3, but not gonna analyze it)

Did you feel emotions of this impossible war against this all-encompassing, all-powerful, invincible, immortal, cunning Evil with armies from 3 continents and 2 worlds? No? Me neither.

Oh well, but there were a lot of deaths of ordinary soldiers. I’m quite certain that all of Terrasen’s army was at least twice brought back to life for them to die in these numbers.

Logic or lack thereof

Oh, and let’s not forget about the Deus ex machina army of unbeatable, magical elves on wolves, from legends, living for the past thousands of years in the unreachable lands of the north, because they managed to run from the surprise attack 10 years earlier. Did I mention that they came from portals, which the whole book was telling us were impossible to make in this scenario? After the previous saviour army was already fighting there for a day? And that Aelin didn’t know they would come for sure (how did she contact them again?)? Even though they were waiting in the full armours for these portals? Ah, and also: that army didn’t do anything. They just came and fought for maybe 4 minutes. And there were just so many things like that!

And if we’re on the topic of armies I present you: ‘My favourite absurd-list in the series: allied armies’.

(As a comparison, in A Song of Ice and Fire by J.R.R Martin, in 7 kingdoms of Westeros, at the peak of war there were 7 forces present, but not all were even engaged in a war.)

First the ones that made sense:

Armies of Terrasen’s Lords (counted as one, not gonna nitpick)

The Khaganate army (also counted as one)

Galan Ashryver’s armada

Whitethorn fraction

Rebel Ironteeth witches

…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’?

And there were some that did not:

Ansel of Briarcliff’s army

The Silent Assassins

Mycenians

Wild Men of the Fangs

Army of magical elves on wolves

And the ‘I don’t even know’ category:

Crochan witches

Overpowering and overreaching

Section title tells it all. The stakes were too high. I was honestly waiting for Aelin to become Super Saiyan and start to throw planets at Maeve and Erawan. I won’t spoil if this happened.

In my opinion it could be a really great series, if our list of villains ended with Arobynn and King of Adarlan, and the list of Aelin titles with an assassin and a princess. We could have had two main fight plots: one emotional with Arobynn, when Aelin would have to face a damage he had done to her, and overcome it. And the second one, with freeing Terrasen from Adarlan’s rule. That’s it. There was an asshole, power hungry king, who feared magic and wanted to rule the East part of a continent. A lot of plot, but not so much that we stopped to care, or didn’t have time to cover everything. We could really get to know what Terrasen and his people were like and not JUST GET TOLD that it was ‘the greatest place in the world’ every damn 20 pages.

Plus…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’? It's a REALLY valid question.

Climaxes

IIf I have to write a list of things that disappointed me in this book, this review would be thrice its current size, but one of the worst grievances I have is the complete lack of acknowledging the plotlines that had been started. This book series has overall 4 372 pages (not counting novellas) and 12 main characters (still not gonna address this). All of them had their storylines and arcs but if they weren't tied up in the previous instalments they wouldn’t be in this one. I get it, Maeve and Erawan got beaten (in an extremely unsatisfactory way) but they were only a background in this series' plots.

Aelin Well, Aelin was one of 3 people (+2 paragraf-long insertion from Nesryn and Chaol) who got their own POV’s after the battle (second was technically Rowan, who was ‘Aelin’s POV outside of Aelin’.The third Dorian, who got almost a full two pages). And from this we got that: she got crowned, Aedion got his bond and that Maas have no idea how the city looks after weeks of siege. In her case what angered me the most was ‘Terrasen is my home’ subplot. Only in this tome we read at least 3 times that Aelin will be okay with dying, if only she gets to see Terrasen one last time, or if she get to die on Terrassen soil. But you know what? Maas forgot to write the scene where Aelin actually ‘comes in’.

Mannon Didn't get her own POV after the battle, but here’s what we’ve got: She is going to the Wastes with Croachans and Ironteeth. Whait. What? Yes, that was the ending of this 500+ years of feud. They fought together and they decided to unite their two species, completely forgetting more than half a millenia of slaughter. I can only hope that there were at least some talks behind the scenes… NO! F*** NO! This isn’t how it works!

Rowan, Dorian, Chaol, Yrene, Lysandra, Aedion, Lorcan, Elide, Nesryn, Sartaq Lived happily ever after

Secondary minor and total background characters Survived (I acknowledge that they would be ignored in most books’ epilogues, but this abomination is almost 1000 pages of nothing!!).

Good Scenes

That saying, this book actually had 4 good scenes:

Crochan witches go to war - gathering-forces-to-fight trope, which is my *love-always trope* so I’m not even sure if it was relatively good, or if I’m just a slut for this trope. It was still only a paragraph long though.

[recurring] The children’s tale Aelin repeated to herself to remember who she is.

‘Lorcan Lochan’ - the only marginally funny scene in the whole book

I actually found Darrel making Evangeline his heir charming. Even if circumstances were far-fetched at least.

But the words crime of this book? It was agonisingly, mind-numbingly boring. If the overexplaining and repetitions were to be taken out I highly doubt that there would be 300 pages left.

For these 33 hours of audiobook I suffered through I give it half a star. Because Abraxos exist.

Please see my garishly accurate cover on my instagram! You can also like it there :D

instagram | goodreads

[ghostmartyr]

how a life can move from the darkness [6/?]

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |

Summary:  Two drug addicts (Eren and Historia) meet in group and decide to be roommates to make their  living situation slightly less weird. From there we do the slow burn  found family dance mixed in with the struggles and agonies of recovery. Heavy on friendship feels, especially EMA. Eventual yumikuri.

“What the fuck did you do to this thing?”

Eren was in Reiner’s house for breakfast.

He’d been in Reiner’s house earlier, before they left, to drop off Ymir’s book on the dining table. It had felt like the safest way to handle it. He didn’t see how sharing either of the experiences of Ymir’s latest readers with her would do anything good. Ymir was socially aware enough to get what a silent return meant. She didn’t spend hours staring at her phone to send off a, “did you get home ok?” text that arrived when every possible recipient was asleep. She could read between the lines.

The only lines Ymir looked to be caring about were the gouges marking the formerly neatly divided pages. Where they had collided with a door.

There were a few other suggestive wrinkles Eren had not asked about.

Ymir wasn’t interested in that kind of tact.

“It ran into a door,” Eren said, reaching around Bertolt for the orange juice.

“If you were going to use that excuse, you should have spent it on your face. Let the tennis ball take the fall for this.” Ymir was flipping the pages back and forth in disgust. She hadn’t looked at him once after confirming that he had made it inside complaining range.

Reiner had snatched some bacon off the frying pan, and was munching on it happily by the sink. He hadn’t seen anything wrong with the book. Eren didn’t, either. He was surprised she’d noticed. After a day in his backpack, most of his borrowed books from Armin looked about the same.

“It isn’t an excuse,” Eren said around his glass, “it’s what happened.”

Ymir turned the book over and inspected some less explainable marks, about the size of a very tiny human’s fingernail, on the cover. “I suppose this time it’s also your roommate’s fault.”

Eren chose not to answer that.

Ymir chose to use her seventh or eighth sense of mind reading and finally took her eyes off her book long enough to run a scan on Eren.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Eren put his glass down with more force than he intended to, drawing a pointed look from Bertolt. “There are only a few marks on it,” he said. “Everything’s still legible.”

Ymir went on pretending Eren wasn’t in the room while aiming conversation at him. “Has she considered an anger management class? Or sticking to throwing things at you?” Ymir mimed taking aim at him with enough irritation that Eren had to stop himself from ducking. “Why’d she even have it?” she asked. “I thought Reiner gave it to you to stave off your raving curiosity about the wild world of fuzzy hand-holding feelings.”

“I was trying to keep busy,” Eren said.

Ymir flopped the book down on her lap. “Then how did Lady Throws-a-Lot end up with it?”

Eren retrieved a plate of toast for himself, and set to work buttering it.

“…You didn’t read it, did you?”

Bertolt, in some misguided attempt at help or more misguided attempt to make Ymir feel some sort of guilt for forcing her work on people, said, “That’s allowed.”

Ymir ignored him the way none of the rest of them managed with her. “So you tossed it off on your roommate, and she threw it into a door.” She draped herself over the back of the couch, a very deep scowl etched in her face. “Nothing like knowing your art’s appreciated.”

Eren might have felt bad. Only the book had reminded him and everyone who lived with him of some of the worst moments of their lives. Ymir could figure out how to suck up two people not liking her book. Bertolt didn’t exactly keep how he felt about her writing a secret, and they got on fine.

“Wait,” Ymir said suddenly, “is she the one who left that bitchy review on Goodreads?”

Eren didn’t know what Goodreads was. He also didn’t think any of Historia’s thoughts on Ymir’s book were printable.

“She is.”

Eren swallowed his toast. “I have no idea. Is it that weird for you to get a bad review?”

“It’s weird for her to care several days later,” Bertolt muttered.

“It was a pretty bad one,” Reiner interjected. “Most of the people who don’t like her stuff drop her star average and leave it at that. This one went on for paragraphs about where the book went wrong. Being bothered by that isn’t so weird.”

“I’m not bothered,” Ymir said loudly. “Except by Eren’s bad taste existing in a second person on this bitch of an earth. Is that how you ended up living together? ‘Help, keeper wanted. Must have no standards.’”

There was something wrong in the world that in all their time knowing each other, Eren was the only one who’d had something thrown at him. “…That isn’t what happened.”

“Say that again, but in your believable tone of voice.”

Eren crammed the rest of his toast in his mouth and chewed as slowly as he could, keeping his only eye contact with the stove and Bertolt’s tiny, oddly encouraging smile.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Ymir slide the book over the coffee table and yank out her phone from her pocket, tapping faster than Eren did when he was successfully holding back from throwing his at something.

Reiner, dipping his head in the sink, looked over at her. “What are you doing?”

“A public service,” Ymir said mildly.

“The last one of those you did put you in jail,” Bertolt said.

Ymir’s fingers stopped moving, and the cloud of irritation surrounding her took a dip into something Eren didn’t think he’d want to handle after a full three meals, forget the middle of the first one. The house suddenly felt too quiet for four people. It was the kind of quiet that fell at meetings after someone opened up more than anyone was ready for.

Reiner had turned the water off, but didn’t grab a towel for his head. He stared down the drain, dangerously pale after the heated flush his workout had treated him to.

“Juvie,” Ymir corrected, tapping a full word out. “Court says I’m a delinquent, not a felon.”

Reiner let out a loud laugh they could all hear the panic in as Eren silently handed him a towel. Bertolt didn’t turn around from his place at the stove.

Eren finished his toast.

He’d never be able to tell Armin, and it wasn’t a good idea to bring it up, anyway.

But like he was about everything else in the known universe, Armin had been right. Moving out was the right call. He had too many ghosts in his head to keep sharing rent with the others.

He didn’t envy Reiner.

----

The thing about Mikasa, the thing that had driven him up the wall for years and years and still could kick off a good sulk if it happened at the wrong moment, was that she was the most amazing athlete Eren had ever met. There wasn’t a sport she couldn’t star in. There wasn’t a race she couldn’t win. There wasn’t a tournament she’d been in that hadn’t handed her some kind of trophy.

Zeke wasn’t going to just pass up on that.

Which was fine. Zeke cutting contact with Mikasa because Eren did had always been an unexpected help, so having it ripped away just as unexpectedly was fine. Zeke hadn’t exactly promised to help pace out Eren’s return to his friendships. Or ever brought it up at all.

All that meant was they were a trio today. Eren, Mikasa, and Historia. Playing catch until the inevitable moment where batting practice started and Mikasa would look at him wondering why his favorite part of practice had turned into something he didn’t make an attempt at.

Eren had done too many pathetic things for lurking behind the park bathrooms on his cellphone to rank anymore. That didn’t mean he was impressed with himself over it.

“You sure you can’t make it?” he asked, pressing his palms into the coarse cinder block wall. “Zeke runs his practices pretty long.”

“The test’s tomorrow,” Armin was saying, sighing. “I don’t want to spend all this time tutoring her only for nerves to ruin it. Sasha thinks she focuses better when I’m here, and…”

He trailed off, guilt and embarrassment saying what he wouldn’t. “She does?” Eren finished for him.

“I’m really sorry.”

“No—don’t—” Eren bit down on his hand to keep from shouting in frustration. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to take Armin apologizing normally again. “No one’s going to drag you out of tutoring to make you watch some boring practice. You’re where you should be.”

The other line stayed quiet for a stretch, catching the hum of the bus Armin was on. Eren made himself not think about that, and didn’t fail completely. That was basically a success.

“Eren, if you need me to be there… for whatever reason, you know I’ll be there.”

Eren’s heart clenched. “I’m fine, Armin.”

Wait, crap, he’d said that before.

“For real, this time.”

Phones were okay, sometimes. He couldn’t see all the memories darkening Armin’s face before he took his breath and changed the topic.

“Maybe we can see a movie to make up for it. If Mikasa gets you to herself, I should too. There’s a new zombie one that just came out. We could go?”

“You hate zombie movies,” Eren said flatly. “You don’t need to baby me, Armin.”

“…I know. Part of me…” Eren braced himself for the hit, but it still hurt. “Part of me is still scared you won’t pick up when I call. I just…” Armin sighed again. “I wish Sasha didn’t have a test tomorrow,” he said. “I don’t want to miss being with you.”

Eren had his forehead against the wall, and his heart hurt better than anything had in a long time. Even when Armin’s embarrassment caught up with him and he started stumbling through his words instead of reciting them off the script in his head.

“So I mean it on the movie. Any time I’m not in class. Or, well, if you wanted, Thursday’s professor isn’t very engaged with the material, so I wouldn’t mind—”

“A movie sounds great,” Eren said.

“…It does?”

“Yeah. It does.” Eren swapped hands. “Only I probably don’t want to watch zombie flicks either. Blood is…” Too much like the images flying through his head whenever he tried to pick up a baseball bat. He pressed harder against the wall, probably scraping his forehead and creating more questions for Mikasa to ask.

“We needed to update our movie list anyway,” Armin said.

Eren frowned sourly. “There’s nothing wrong with our list.”

“There’s a lot wrong with our list.”

He said that every movie night. “Bad special effects are fun, Armin.”

“They’re bad, Eren. Every time we rent one we’re encouraging them to be lazy.”

“Name one movie that’s come out in the last five years you approve of.”

“High standards aren’t a bad thing!”

“If we followed all of them we wouldn’t have a list.”

Eren could hear Armin’s near-silent sigh, and his mouth hurt from smiling.

“You’re sure you don’t need me?”

“Yeah,” Eren said. “Not with this, anyway. You’re still good to have around.”

“Do you want to—” Armin audibly cut himself off.

Talk about it?

This it?

No. Never.

Eren wasn’t looking forward to finding out when that absolute turned out to be just as wrong as all the other ones he’d snapped off during recovery.

Armin would always be Armin, but Eren was only now coming back to being Eren. He couldn’t float on that expectation. He closed his eyes and bit out the truth. “I’m not sure I’ll handle Mikasa worrying about it. It’s nothing huge, but it… it’s a change from before.”

A change he didn’t want to go over with just one of them around. Armin wouldn’t say anything. Eren wasn’t sure Mikasa could resist. Then if she could, it would only be because Eren had lost it on her the last time she’d tried to be good to him, and he wanted that even less than he wanted the questions.

He wasn’t a fan of baseball. Batting practice had always been the thing that made up for it. He couldn’t just hide that falling apart.

He couldn’t come up with a polite way to ask Mikasa to stay out of his problems. That sounded like half their normal arguments from the first note, and they were too far from normal to survive bringing that fight back into the ring now.

Armin’s voice brought him back from his brooding. “I think you know more about change than we do, Eren. Just… try not to yell at her. It will be okay.”

“You think?”

“…Try really hard not to yell at her.”

“Right.”

----

Eren didn’t yell.

He didn’t even get a chance.

Mikasa’s eyes, fragile and dangerous like broken glass, followed him on his way to put his glove in the dugout. Historia, trying to be a good friend and not having any more of a clue than Eren did, had briefly attempted to walk between them, but she seemed even weaker to Mikasa’s aura than Eren was, and broke off on her own before any real difference was accomplished.

She’d stopped pulling down her sleeves. Shadows of track marks slid open with every throw she’d lobbed his or Mikasa’s way, and nothing fell to pieces. Better yet, off in their own triad in the outfield, no one asked invasive questions about it.

After the conversation with Armin, he’d been more jealous than happy for her, but that had to be some kind of good sign.

Then Yelena had signaled them for batting practice, and Eren hadn’t hid his furtive look at Mikasa well enough, and that had snapped Historia’s worried eyes to both of them, and there was something fucked about wanting the people he lived for to just go away and be gone for a second, but he didn’t yell.

Leaving Mikasa watching him in silence, weighing her worry against all of the horrible wrongs he’d put her through once and could easily drag both of them back into if they didn’t keep their mouths shut around each other.

Worry was winning out. It was written all over her face, worse than with Armin. Because worry always won because she was the responsible, good one, and Eren wasn’t going to yell but his head was screaming, wanting his pills like he hadn’t in weeks—when Zeke walked over and lobbed a helmet Mikasa’s way.

“Eren’s out for batting practice. You’re up first, Mikasa.”

Worry turned to annoyance like only Zeke could bring out in her, and Eren’s fists relaxed enough for him to feel his hands again.

She put the helmet on and took up a bat, looking back at him one last time on her way out, but not broaching the unspoken topic further.

“She reminds me of Frieda,” Historia said, technically sitting next to him, but leaving enough space that anyone else who wanted to sit next to Eren still could.

“Wow,” Eren said. “High praise from you.”

Zeke started with a fastball. Mikasa fouled it off. The crack of the bat hurt Eren’s ears.

“She worried too much. I could never make it go away.”

Another fastball, another foul. Zeke didn’t usually throw that hard for the first batter.

“I still can’t.”

Zeke was going to go for a curveball after he worked Mikasa into a rhythm with her swings. Zeke liked the game part of the sport, and he’d liked winding Mikasa up ever since her cousin had punched him in the face. Mikasa would get the hit in the end, though. Batting practice, not pitching practice. Zeke took his baseball seriously.

“Armin told me to try not to yell at her,” Eren said.

Historia didn’t comment. Her fingers were digging silently into her scarred arms.

“It was never just that,” he said, “but trying not to yell at her used to take a lot of pills.”

Zeke finally threw his curveball, and Mikasa sent it flying back over his head. Colt sprinted back to the center field fence, but he’d need to be several yards taller for that to matter any.

She ripped off her helmet so fast she probably ripped out some of her hair, and she didn’t spare Zeke any attention on her way back to the dugout, Eren being personally rewarded all of it. She slipped into the space Historia had left her without question and stared at him. He stared over her shoulder and thought about a life where it didn’t make him think of orange bottles that didn’t belong to him.

Historia leaned back against the splintery planks walling them all together, a tiny—sympathetic when she noticed Eren’s irritated scowl—twitch that could have really been a smile on her face.

Mikasa spoke, and it wasn’t what he expected.

“Are you still okay?”

It was the highest mark of Mikasa’s approval that she didn’t lower her voice out of Historia’s range to go with the rest of the dugout’s, and Eren would love her for that if he ever stopped feeling like an inadequate idiot whenever Mikasa unveiled herself in all her steady perfection. Eren kept his mouth shut because all he could think of was ways to hurt her, and she opened hers up and actually found a thing that could keep him from wanting to yell.

He would never deserve these people.

He could still try.

“It’s a Dad thing,” he said, the truth making his mouth itch and the lightning bolt of surprise Mikasa couldn’t hide making his heart and knuckles ache. “Not a drug thing.”

They all quietly watched Yelena step up to the plate, not-so-casually looking back at their shadowed corner before she hefted the bat over her shoulder. Eren thought about glaring, but Historia hadn’t noticed anything about Yelena’s overt curiosity, and Historia not noticing was fine for their stabilizing sanity.

“Does Zeke know?” Mikasa asked.

“I don’t think he’d want to.” The funeral was one of the clearer memories Eren had from afterwards. Zeke was a blur in it. He’d asked once how Eren was feeling. Then he’d left. Then he’d taken him to rehab.

Historia caught his eye sharply.

Eren shrugged at her and watched Yelena hit a clean line drive. There wasn’t much to say about it. Historia had been right. That wasn’t what she’d been getting at, but it was what was there. Mikasa was his Frieda. Zeke was just his brother.

His big brother, who watched bad movies with him when he had a lousy day and never talked about feelings. Not his, not Eren’s, not…

Not their dad’s.

Zeke wouldn’t want to hear about why his death took away pitching for his little brother.

----

“Frieda never wanted to talk about it either.”

Eren was eating his cheerios with what Armin used to call his morning glower when Historia plopped across from him with her bowl. Neither of them was having a cooking morning. Eren had stayed in his room the whole night, but Historia had already been up when he walked out, texting someone under Benjamin’s tank. He would have assumed Frieda, but Frieda kept some strange hours that didn’t include sunrise.

“I didn’t know you had friends,” he’d said, waving good morning to Benjamin.

Historia had stopped typing mid-sentence, stared at him long enough for Eren to wonder if maybe the reason she was up was because she’d never gotten any sleep, and said, “I don’t.”

It wasn’t a talking morning, either. He’d thought.

Historia, stirring milk into the cereal she wasn’t eating, had maybe changed her mind about that.

“Talk about what?” Eren asked.

“How I killed our father.”

The crunch of the cheerios in Eren’s mouth sounding like steel grinding on steel. He swallowed and dropped his spoon back in the bowl.

He sometimes thought the reason Historia didn’t talk during group was because her head couldn’t figure out when it’d been given the okay to talk about things, so she just took random guesses that landed these conversations wherever there was space for them. With some weird definition of space that included the other person being in an entirely different ballpark when she started swinging.

He was spending too much time near Zeke.

“She saw the police report, and everyone told her,” Historia said, “but I think she wants me to forget so badly she pretends she doesn’t know.” She poured more cereal out of the box on top of what she already had, not taking a bite. “I never wanted to talk about it with her, so I didn’t mind.”

“I don’t want to talk about it with anyone,” Eren said, morning glower in full bloom.

Historia closed the box. “You want Zeke to want you to.”

“Zeke had a bad relationship with our dad.” Eren jammed another spoonful of breakfast in his mouth and crunched through it on sheer will. “He doesn’t want to hear about it.”

“If he thought it would make you join batting practice he might.”

Armin used to flick cheerios at him in the morning when he thought Eren was starting the day with too much gloom. Eren thought about dumping his entire bowl on Historia’s head. He couldn’t do that, because she’d retaliate, and he had work. There wasn’t time for a second shower.

Following the spirit of belligerent aggravation anyway, he asked, “How’d you do it?”

“I stabbed him in the neck with a syringe of morphine.”

Eren stopped eating.

“Father had a drug problem,” Historia said. “He was an alcoholic, too, but none of the bottles would have worked unless I broke them ahead of time. The morphine was already set up.”

This was the problem with throwing his fists at one of Historia’s walls. There was always something ready to climb on through the crack and sink its teeth in. Eren let his hands rest on the counter. It made him feel less like he’d eaten an icicle instead of cheap cereal.

The marks on her arms were like tractor beams. Historia could glare at him all she wanted for it, she was the one who had death tattooed all over and kept talking about it. “…So you decided to kill yourself the same way?”

Historia contemplated her first spoonful of breakfast. “Petra says avoidance is only one coping technique.”

The snort that brought out wasn’t what Eren expected from himself. The icicle cracked, melting into something like the soup all of Historia’s stirring had turned her bowl into. He looked away from her scars and out the oversized windows that walled their apartment off from the rest of the world. Light was creeping in through the curtains, and they both should have finished eating by now.

He shoveled in another mouthful of cheerios. “Zeke gave it to me.” He swallowed and thought of blood drowning his hands and lost heartbeats and ticking anniversary watches and pills. “He’s the older one. I get all his hand-me-downs.”

Eren took another bite.

“I don’t want to talk about it, and he doesn’t want to hear about it,” he said. “We’re finally synched up.”

Historia’s phone buzzed across the counter with whatever notification it had from the person who wasn’t her friend. She snatched it up with a spark of annoyance so profound Eren was pretty sure she forgot all about him for a second. But she remembered to look up and give the conversation an option of ending.

“Okay,” she said.

Eren took it. Before he actually ended up late for work.

----

Ymir did not text Eren. She mocked him, she prodded every hole his t-shirts had and several they didn’t, she stole his jacket and wore it for a week when he accidentally left it at Reiner’s, she routinely told him how he was running his business wrong—but she didn’t text him.

Eren wouldn’t have guessed that she had his number.

Until he thought about what he knew of her as a person, which he tried not to do when she wasn’t in the room making him.

Ymir had texted Eren. In the middle of the night. With all of one sentence, followed by a series of tweets that Eren could feel a migraine building over.

Ur roommate’s a dick

Crystal Wick @Crys_Wickiland34 Replying to @distrustfund500 It’s a grand romantic gesture, sorry it went over your head.

distrustfund500 @distrustfund500 Replying to @Crys_Wickiland34 It’s idiotic.

Crystal Wick @Crys_Wickiland34 Replying to @distrustfund500 This from the person who throws tennis balls at people?

The last attachment was just a screencap of what Eren had to assume was Historia’s username.

tennisbomber500 @distrustfund500

No one had ever given Historia the Ymir 101 advice of ignoring Ymir. Because Historia had never been under any threat of meeting Ymir, and that should have been enough to save her.

Constructive emotional expression had come up at the last meeting. Petra probably wouldn’t call yelling at Ymir over a romance novel constructive or productive or healthy, but she’d never met Ymir either. Or watched Historia fall to pieces over things she never talked about. Unless the black eye counted, but that had been Eren on the ground.

Eren blinked at his phone for a second. The words were starting to blur. With a soft click, he gave up, closed his messages, and rolled over to go back to sleep, smiling a bit at the afterimage of the last text Armin had sent, demanding a blood oath promise to not name Benjamin’s new eel friend (if they got him one) Murray.

Ymir could stand to have someone annoy her for once in her life.

[next]