#I THOUGHT IT WAS A SCREENSHOT FOR A SOLID MINUTE

[nhmkhnh]

PAIRINGS: VI X FEM!READER

PREFACE: she ran every calculation, analyzed every outcome— but still couldn’t predict how fucking wrecked you’d make her feel.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: haha i'm back, but nah i remake that loser!vi draft into this thang, yeah.

TAGS: nsfw content · nerd!vi · loser!vi · pervert!vi · possessive!vi · subtext turned explicit · sexual tension · lap sitting · wet dreams · public horniness · accidental touching · strap-on use · vi has zero chill · dirty thoughts and dumber reactions · from moans to mayhem · reader teasing turns vi feral · first time breaking point · horny academic breakdown · dom!vi activation · glasses stay ON · vi says “fuck it” and fucks you.

vi always volunteers to help you review for finals—not because she’s a genius, but because she wants an excuse to sit close. she's that type of nerd who prints out a whole custom cheat sheet in color-coded tabs, highlights things that "might come up," and lowkey loses her train of thought every time your hand brushes hers while reaching for a pencil.

you don’t even notice what she’s doing half the time—but vi? vi is dying quietly.

she’s perched on the edge of her bed, glasses slipping down her nose, hoodie sleeves half-pulled over her fingers as she tries to explain the difference between two formulas. but you lean over to look at her notes, and your shirt slips just an inch. just enough to show your collarbone.

her mouth goes dry.

her voice cracks halfway through a sentence.

“…so if you, um… you d-derive it here…” she coughs and violently turns her face away, pretending to look for her water bottle. “shit. uh. sorry. lost my place.”

you giggle. "you're so red right now."

vi literally cannot breathe. she’s gripping her pen like it’s a lifeline and trying not to imagine things she should not be imagining while you sit there looking like that in her room.

if only you knew the shit she writes in her private notebook later. like how she described your laugh as "effortless dopamine" and rated the way you chew gum a 9.5 on the vi-can’t-focus scale.

oh, and every time you call her smart?

she walks into a wall within the next 15 minutes. without fail.

okay no, listen—vi's not a total creep (or so she tells herself). she’s just… a victim. a victim of your instagram story from last summer, when you were lounging poolside in that sinfully tight two-piece, sipping iced tea with your sunglasses slid low on your nose.

she screenshotted it. without hesitation. then panicked and threw her phone across the room like it burned her fingers.

then… she picked it up. opened it again. zoomed in. cropped out the background. stared for like, a solid minute.

and renamed the file “notes3.pdf” to hide it in her study folder.

vi knows it’s wrong. she knows it’s bad. but gods, it’s 2am and she’s lying in bed, sweaty and flushed and biting the edge of her pillow because that picture of you won’t leave her head. she’s got one hand shoved under the waistband of her sleep shorts, muffling her whimpers with her hoodie sleeve like you’ll hear her through the walls.

the image is so burned into her brain she doesn’t even need to open the folder anymore. all she has to do is close her eyes and pretend your thighs are around her head, your voice breathy and teasing: "what would your little nerd friends say if they saw you like this, huh?"

and every time she comes? she whispers your name into the dark like a secret. like a prayer. then immediately opens a new tab to delete the image. (but she never does.)

she swears she didn’t mean to do it.

you left it behind one day—just a little pink tube, tossed at the bottom of her bag after study group. you’d even said, “you can keep it, i’ve got like five.” but vi didn’t throw it out. she didn’t return it. she just… looked at it. a lot. thumbed the cap. rolled it up to see the worn-down curve of the balm where your lips had pressed.

then she opened it.

took a deep breath.

it smelled like strawberry and sin.

the first time she tried it, she was alone in her room, curled up in her hoodie, laptop on her thighs—but she couldn’t stop staring at the tube. like it dared her. so she twisted it up and dragged it across her lips, slow. pretending it was you doing it. pretending you were leaning down, whispering, “hold still, baby, let me take care of you…”

she got so worked up from just that thought, she had to shove her laptop off her legs and grind into her pillow like a desperate, useless virgin who’d never been touched before. and let’s be honest—she kinda hasn’t.

now it’s routine. every night. lights off. chapstick on. fingers in. you in her head.

sometimes she gets bold—leans back in her desk chair, spreads her legs, one hand down her sweats and the other gripping the damn chapstick like she’ll die if she drops it. whimpering out “fuck—fuck, please, please—“ to no one but the air.

when she comes, her thighs shake. and the chapstick’s still there. resting on her chest like a trophy. like it owns her.

and it kind of does.

vi thought she was being quiet. thought the pillow stuffed against her mouth and the gentle whirr of her desk fan would cover it. she was wrong.

it was just another night—2:43am, hoodie halfway stripped, the room dim and warm, the air tasting like sweat and shame. she was on her back, legs bent, one hand down her sleep shorts, the other gripping the edge of her blanket like it could keep her from falling apart.

you’d texted her earlier: “sleep tight, nerd 💛” and that was it. that was all it took.

now every time her fingers slip against her clit, her brain plays out imaginary scenes of you calling her that—“nerd”—but in a voice all breathy and mean and teasing. like you’re on top of her, straddling her, watching her fall apart.

and this time?

this time she just… lost control.

she was so close, she didn’t even realize her voice was rising— didn’t even catch it when her lips parted and she moaned, "f-fuck—… please—don’t stop—"

then a cough. a loud-ass, unmistakable cough from the other side of the room.

her whole body locked up. wide-eyed. palm still buried between her legs.

roommate: “…you good, dude?”

vi: "…yep. just—bad dream."

the silence that followed was biblical.

she didn’t move for ten minutes. just laid there, hand still wet, face on fire, heart slamming so hard against her ribs she thought she might throw up.

next morning? roommate didn’t say a word. but vi swears she caught them smirking when you came over later, all sunshine and oblivious charm, giving vi a hug while she stood stiff and red and sweating.

it started off innocent—summer heat, library ac busted, both of you sweating through your shirts after walking across campus. you stopped by a corner shop, bought two cones, handed one to vi without a second thought.

she didn’t even lick hers.

because the second she turned to look at you, you were already dragging your tongue up the side of yours, slow and absent-minded, eyes somewhere off in the distance, lips parted slightly like you didn’t even notice what you were doing.

vi did.

she noticed everything.

your lips wrapping around the tip. the way the ice cream melted and slid down your wrist. how you licked it off with one long stroke, then sucked your finger clean like it was nothing.

her cone melted in her fist. she didn’t take a single bite.

she just stood there in stunned, boner-deep silence, heat flooding her body in places that had nothing to do with the weather. her thighs clenched. her ears burned. her heart was punching holes in her ribs.

all she could think— that could be me. fuck, that should be me.

she walked into a street pole two minutes later. didn’t even notice until you gasped and ran over. she blamed the sun. you bought her a new cone.

later that night, she stared at her ceiling with a hand between her legs, moaning your name into the darkness while whispering, “just like that. just like that—f-fuck, yeah, eat me like you ate that cone—”

it happened while you two were packing for a weekend trip—just a casual little beach getaway with friends, nothing serious. vi was helping you toss stuff into your duffel bag while pretending not to stare every time you bent over in your shorts.

and then— you flung a whole handful of clothes her way and said, "can you fold those for me real quick? thanks, babe!"

her brain short-circuited at “babe” alone, but then her hands sank into the pile— and wrapped around something soft, thin, lacy.

it took her half a second to realize what she was holding. another half second to look down and see— your panties. your favorite black lace pair.

vi didn’t move. didn’t breathe. just stared.

they were still warm.

she went rigid, every single muscle in her loser nerd body locking up like a corrupted file. her ears turned red. her lips parted. and before she could stop it— a tiny whimper escaped.

just—“ah.” soft. pitiful. broken. like she’d just been stabbed by horny.

and then?

she bolted.

mumbled something like “gotta pee real quick!” and sprinted to the bathroom like her life depended on it. the door slammed. the lock clicked.

and she collapsed against the sink, clutching your underwear in both hands like it was a sacred object, forehead pressed to the mirror, whispering— “you’re so fucked up, violet. so fucking sick. but gods, they smell like her. fuck—”

she didn’t even make it to the toilet. dropped to her knees right there on the bathroom rug, panties clutched in one hand, the other between her legs, hoodie sleeves rolled up and teeth biting down on the fabric to keep quiet.

came fast. came hard. tried to wash her face like nothing happened. came out five minutes later looking destroyed.

you: “you okay?”

vi: “yep. super good. hydrated. thriving.”

you: “…why are your ears red?”

vi: “sunburn. shut up.”

the lecture was boring. the lights were dim. the professor was talking about something vi didn’t care about—maybe economic theory, maybe planetary motion. who knows.

because in front of her? you were chewing your pen.

and not like a normal person. no. you had your lips wrapped around the end of it—slowly. you’d suck for a second, then bite gently. then drag your teeth down the plastic shaft like it owed you money.

vi’s entire consciousness evacuated her body.

she blinked. once. twice. and then just… froze. pen halfway in her mouth, tongue poking the inside of her cheek— you looked like a whole fucking wet dream and didn’t even know it.

vi’s thighs clenched under the desk. her grip on her notes turned deathly. her glasses started fogging up and she swiped them off, pressing her face into her sleeve, “fuckfuckfuck—” under her breath, shaking like a damn leaf.

every time you twirled the pen or bit it harder, she swore she could feel it. in her stomach. in her chest. between her legs.

and then you stretched.

arms over your head. shirt riding up. vi saw a sliver of bare back and nearly came on the spot.

she had to excuse herself.

muttered something about needing to print slides, rushed out of the lecture hall and into the first empty bathroom, slammed the stall door, and buried two fingers into her soaked panties with the desperate grace of someone not okay.

panting, head back, she came whispering your name and the word “pen” like it was a sin she couldn’t stop committing.

she went back to class 20 minutes later with shaky legs and didn’t remember a single word of the lesson.

vi was halfway through a ranked match—keyboard clacking, headphones on, tongue poking out slightly in concentration. she didn’t even notice you approach until you laughed and said:

"ugh, i’m tired. let me sit here for a sec."

and before she could ask what “here” meant—

you sat. right on her lap. facing the screen. wiggling to get comfy.

vi flatlined.

like, physically short-circuited. her hands froze. her headset slid crooked on her head. every neuron in her brain screamed what the fuck while her body screamed don’t move or you’ll die.

because you weren’t just sitting. you were squirming. and you had no fucking clue you were grinding down onto her lap like a tease with zero self-awareness.

her thighs tensed. her breath stuttered. and her dick— (her strap, tucked under sweats because she was feeling a lil fruity that day) shifted. pressed. throbbed.

right beneath you.

her voice cracked.

“uh—fuck—b-babe, wh-what are you—”

you shushed her. “you’re playing, right? don’t mind me.”

and you leaned back. all the way into her chest. let your arms rest on hers. melted into her like you didn’t just turn her into a human vibrator.

she didn’t even finish the match.

dropped the mouse. let out this pathetic little moan in your ear— and grabbed your waist with both hands, fingers digging in.

“i—i can’t fucking take this,” she whispered.

you froze. and felt it. the outline of the strap. rock hard under you. the way she was breathing—so heavy, so fucking desperate.

her voice rasped, low and ruined: “you’re gonna sit here and be good, yeah? or i’m fucking this into you. right now. on this chair. don’t care if the door’s open.”

the skies opened without warning. vi was already seated when you burst in—out of breath, soaked to the skin, laughing.

“fuck,” you huffed, brushing hair out of your face. “i didn’t bring an umbrella.”

and that’s when she saw it.

the white shirt. soaked. transparent. clinging to your chest like a second skin. every. damn. curve. the lace of your bra outlined in full definition. drops of water trailing down your collarbones. your thighs shining with rain and sweat.

and vi?

vi died.

her eyes went wide. her mouth dropped open. she blinked so hard her glasses fogged up just from body heat. her throat went dry. her brain emptied like a deleted word doc.

you waved at her.

she waved back. missed. hit the edge of her chair.

you sat beside her. legs crossed. shirt still soaked. and every time you shifted in your seat, the fabric pulled across your chest just enough to make her pulse spike.

she couldn’t think. couldn’t breathe. couldn’t stop imagining things.

how your skin would feel under her hands. how that soaked shirt would peel off with a sticky sound. how her tongue would follow every drop down your stomach until—

"vi."

she jumped. looked up. the professor was calling on her.

vi stammered. “i—i didn’t—um—sorry, could you repeat the—yeah. just—sorry. my brain’s—um—rain.” everyone laughed. you leaned over and whispered: “you okay, nerd?”

her legs clenched so tight under the desk she might’ve bruised herself. and then, after class, she disappeared into the bathroom for a solid twenty minutes.

no one asked.

no one needed to.

the sigh she let out behind that locked stall door said it all: “holy fuck, i’m gonna die for this girl.”

it started slow.

just a dream. warm, hazy, too good to be real.

you were on top of her, hips grinding into hers, thighs caging her in, hair messy, lips parted. you were panting. desperate. fucking gorgeous.

and you were saying her name. over and over. "vi. vi. god, vi—right there, right there—don’t stop—"

her hands were on your ass. your nails were clawing down her chest. her strap was buried deep in you and your walls were so tight and you were so wet and— fuck. she couldn’t hold it.

in the dream, she grabbed your hips, slammed up into you, and came with a broken, ragged moan.

and in real life?

she came too.

in her fucking sleep.

body shuddering. thighs trembling. sweat slick on her forehead. hand still in her panties. your name slipping from her lips in a soft, gasping whisper: "fuck—"

and her roommate heard it. of course they did.

“…vi? dude, you good?”

vi jolted upright like she’d been electrocuted. soaked through. blanket kicked off. hair a mess. pussy still pulsing.

she couldn’t even lie. just sat there like a broken sim with her hand still halfway in her sweats.

"…yeah," she croaked. "i'm great."

BONUS: BREAKING POINT

you were sitting on her lap again. like nothing. like you didn’t know what you were doing.

your ass—warm and soft—pressed snug against her thighs. you giggled, wiggled, threw your arms around her shoulders, and leaned in like this was just another game. "hey, cutie nerd."

vi gripped your thighs. tight.

her jaw tensed. her glasses slid just a little down her nose. you were facing away, oblivious, the hem of your skirt brushing her knees, your scent everywhere—like sunscreen and body lotion and danger. vi had been keeping it together. she’d tried. gods, had she tried. all those months of being your sweet little nerd—tutoring you, stammering when you bent over, blushing when you called her pretty.

but today?

today you fucking whispered:

"does sitting on you turn you on, vi?"

right into her ear.

click. that was the sound of something inside her snapping. a line that had been stretched way too thin—too many nights of your casual teasing, too many dreams soaked through with your name on her tongue.

she stood up. lifted you. just—grabbed your waist like it was nothing and hauled you into her arms, like you didn’t weigh a thing.

“vi—?”

you barely got the word out before she dropped you onto her bed. sheets soft beneath your back, knees still apart, skirt pushed up.

vi was on top of you in a second. breathing hard. glasses still on. eyes wild. voice low and dangerous.

“you wanna tease me, baby?” her hands were on either side of your head now. “call me a nerd? sit on my lap like you don’t know what you’re doing?”

you blinked up at her. wide-eyed. silent.

that look broke her too.

she grabbed your wrists. pinned them to the mattress. her breath came out sharp, heated. her thigh slotted between yours and pushed—firm, slow, right up into your center.

you gasped.

she grinned.

“then fucking take it.”

her mouth slammed into yours. nothing sweet. all teeth and heat and desperation. her tongue curled against yours, hands squeezing your wrists so hard you whined into the kiss. and vi— vi moaned like she’d been starving for this.

like she needed you to breathe.

“gods,” she muttered, lips against your cheek, then your jaw, then your throat. “you don’t know what you do to me. you think i’m stupid, don’t you? think i didn’t notice when you bent over in that skirt on purpose? you think i didn’t see that lacy shit you wore yesterday?”

she bit your neck. not enough to mark. but enough to make you gasp.

“you really want me to snap, huh?” she growled the words as her hand slid up your thigh. fingers dragging your panties down, slow and messy. “you want your pervy little nerd to go feral on you?”

you didn’t even get the chance to answer. her fingers dipped between your folds—just once, slick and lazy—and she groaned.

“fucking soaked,” she breathed. “you sat on me like this? fuck—”

she pulled back. stripped her hoodie and shirt in one movement, still panting. you saw the strap—thick, already strapped in tight beneath her sweats—and your whole body arched.

vi saw the way you looked at it.

“yeah?” she murmured. “want it?” she climbed back over you, grinding the strap against your bare cunt. “beg.”

you whimpered. “please…”

“please what, baby?” her hand was back on your neck now, not choking—just firm. just reminding you who was on top. “say it. say you want me to fuck you.”

you swallowed. “i want you to fuck me, vi—please, i need it, i’ve been teasing you because i—fuck, i want this—”

she didn’t wait. didn’t give you another chance to speak.

she grabbed your thigh. hooked it over her arm. lined up the strap and slammed in.

you screamed.

in the best way.

it was deep. unforgiving. her hips snapped forward, again, again, her hand covering your mouth to muffle the way you were falling apart.

she leaned down, forehead against yours, fucking you harder than you ever imagined this awkward, stammering nerd could.

“you’re so tight,” she groaned. “so fucking good—fuck—why didn’t i do this sooner? you wanted this. you needed this.”

you nodded desperately under her. legs shaking.

she pulled out halfway—then slammed in again, harder. you cried out, body clenching, back arching.

vi snapped her hips again. “was this what you wanted, huh? your little nerd to break and ruin you?”

you whimpered into her palm.

“then don’t you dare fucking tap out, pretty girl.” her rhythm got faster. rougher. “i’m not done with you yet.”

your orgasm hit so fast it shattered you.

she didn’t even slow down.

kept fucking you through it—eyes locked on your face, watching the way you fell apart under her, shaking and sobbing and trying to breathe.

when you moaned her name—broken, pleading—vi moaned back. whispered, “i love it when you say it like that…”

then she kissed you. deep. slow.

and started fucking you all over again.

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

It's a Match! || 141 x reader

[ Chapter 1 ] || [ Chapter 3 ]

Pairing: Soap x Reader || 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1K~ cw: a bit of dirty talking/innuendos Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you?

Chapter 2: Johnny

“Oh, hello…” You remarked to yourself as your eyes locked into a stunning pair of blue eyes on your screen, stopping your mindless right-swipping. “...Johnny.”

“You’re 29… A soldier… Scottish… Are you friends with Kyle?” You mused playfully. “Let me guess, you’re a gym bro, aren’t you?” You asked sarcastically as you tapped your finger on the right side, skipping through his pictures. The first one immediately after was him lifting while wearing a weightlifting belt. “Yup… Mandatory gym pic.”

Chuckling to yourself, you snap a screenshot of his profile to the girls as well, sending it quick.

leah: @/mia Whatever good energy you sent its working. second hot guy in the last 5 minutes! mia: i lit a CANDLE for this!!!!! leah: there weren’t any handsome guys like this when i was on tinder?! 😫 UNFAIR. 🙄 you: blow it out then cause this is the 3rd actually. leah: 3rd??? Where’s number 2??? you: didn’t think to snap a screenshot. hasn’t matched me back yet. mia: has he posted a shirtless pic? you: kyle did and this one idk but probably. need to check. leah: Don’t forget to send it over.🥴

Shaking your head and laughing in amusement, you went back to Tinder, checking on ‘Johnny’. The mandatory gym pic was there… a couple of them in fact! And then the mandatory shirtless selfie. Or rather… The mandatory shirtless SELFIES. Plural.

Three of them… The first one was him just straight up wearing just a towel… And the next was him in a kilt… And the next was him with a button-up very much so unbuttoned. 

“Oh, my, Johnny-John-John… You sure know how to woo a bird…” You joked to yourself.

You dragged your finger down to check his bio and immediately frowned. “Of course…” You trailed off with a disappointed frown as you snuck another spring roll into your mouth.

He might be stupidly attractive, but his personality… Gosh, he doesn’t know how to sell himself. Boring, boring, boring. “I work out and like video games!” You quipped mockingly and scoffed a bit.

“Artist.” You remarked when you reached the last of his profile’s tags, spotting that word in the hobby section. “An artist? You?” You asked your phone screen as if Johnny would come alive in it and answer you. 

You’d admit, him calling himself an artist was intriguing enough, but normally that wouldn’t be enough to make you Swipe Right on him… But you’re not under normal circumstances. You promised your friends you’d Swipe Right on everyone so…

Your phone almost dropped out of your hand as soon as the ‘It’s a Match’ screen showed. “Of course… He’s probably swiping right on everyone as well…” Rolling your eyes, you go to click off the screen but accidentally enter DMs.

Johnny: ye have any scottish in you? you: not that i know of. Johnny: would ye like to? 🫦 Johnny: wait. wdym not that ye know of??? Johnny: i was trying to be filthy and now got me curious bonnie

“Fuckin’ hell…” You said as you set down your phone and covered your face before breaking into a fit of giggles.

The fact you had accidentally ruined his pick-up line and succeeded in stumping him got you very, very amused. Okay, maybe, just maybe, he wasn’t as boring as you thought.

you: story for another time. you: i walked right into that one tho. good job. Johnny: no ye cant do that Johnny: gotta tell me all about it now you: i mean werent scottish people everywhere in the uk at one point? you: i might be 1/370232103484320th scottish. Johnny: would ye like some MORE scottish in ye then? 🫦 you: solid attempt again. you: if you keep trying you might just get there. Johnny: i intend to dont worry you: soooo… Johnny: so? you: were you wearing underwear under the kilt? Johnny: no Johnny: why want a peek? 😏 you: i’m good you: so ur an artist? Johnny: i am Johnny: ur fast at typing fuck you: what kind? you: keep up then! Johnny: drawing Johnny: im trying 🥴 you: can i see some? Johnny: hanging with my mates difficult to text fast 😤 Johnny: idk if ull be in the mood to see anything after im done with ye you: why? 🤨 Johnny: might be too tired and need to be cuddled to sleep 😏 you: oh fuck off. Johnny: u just cursed me out Johnny: i think m in love 😫 Johnny: gonna tell my mates i just met my spouse 🥴🥴 you: don’t give them any ideas. you: haven’t even agreed to meet up with you. you: haven’t been invited in the first place. Johnny: meet up with me 🙏 Johnny: meet up with me 🙏 Johnny: meet up with me 🙏 Johnny: meet up with me 🙏 Johnny: meet up with me 🙏

Your eyes widened at his enthusiasm and persistence. Okay, he was definitely not boring… It was actually kind of endearing and funny!

you: jc r u copypasting that? Johnny: yes Johnny: are ye going to or not you: can i get back to you on that? Johnny: ill wait for ye you: sure you do that johnny Johnny: ow the sarcasm burns

Concealing a chuckle, you clicked off the DMs page for the second time tonight… but, this time, you closed the app and focused on eating dinner.

Sure, this whole dating app thing was stupid, but at least you were enjoying yourself. 

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taglist: @daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthoney , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe

[beehunterkisser]

Im in the middle of watching the new pnf episodes (ep 4 rn) and I wanna know ur indepth opinions of the new pnf episodes soooo bad,,, They carry the same energy of the early episodes which I love and theyre so fun!!! I LOVE PHINEAS AND FERB!!!! THANK U FOR MAKING COOL ART ABOUT IT!!!

AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH.. THEY REALLY ARE SO MUCH FUN I LOVED THEM ALL.. Since you asked so niceys im fully lifting my spoiler lid and now will deliver to you all . as IN DEPTH AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE

the BEEHUNTERKISSER (first half of) SEASON 5 PHINEAS AND FERB REVIEW!!!

(THIS IS A LONG ASS POST BE WARNED)

SUMMER BLOCK BUSTER/CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MOM

GOOD ASS INTRODUCTION!!!!!!!

i did find block buster to be a lot weaker than cloudy but U need to have a calm before a storm if u catch my drift. also i think this is the episode where the animation is at its weakest. it ramps up sooo fucking good in cloudy. but even then i thoroughly enjoyed it. it was so fun seeing everybody again My bebbies have returned to me...........

That one back and forth where candace steps in after and goes what if you built.. all of them. was so insanely weirdly paced and not funny to me the womp was giving johnny test whipcrack but lucky for me both bread bowl hot tub and the rest of the show get funnier as it goes on LOL

OH AND the scene in cloudy where candace is chasing down momcloud and trying to get through to her has such beautiful lighting and is so SWEEET THEY LOVE THEIR MOM SO MUCH. Also everybody teaming up to save her AND i got yuri pellets (wipes tear from eye) its so damn peak..

LOOK AT THIS MAN ITS SO FUCKING COOL ID EXPECT THIS FROM ONE OF THE MOVIES OR SOMETHING. Linda cloud holds that power over people.. This was genuinely like REALLY cool and exciting im really glad they went with a double episode high stakes adventure for the premiere because like. ive been hungry for some phineas and ferb 22 minute episode drama... its been too long.

ALSO the art in general just had some really cute moments too izzy looks so cute when shes serious. and candace hugging irving. vv first i loled then i serioused. i took a lot of screencaps so im gonna add them here as i go

I genuinely do not have much to say about these episodes for some reason despite how much i loved them. I love that Buford found a Thingy and he Loves it. buford hungry feed him onions and discarded blue couches. Everybody got their own moment here it ruled

The songs in both. summer is starting right now changed me on a molecular level when it dropped it was stuck in my head ALLLLLL DAY EVERY DAY.

I was in work making delisandwiches and in my head technically the first day of summers tomorrow but today is the last day of school. schooooooooooool....

The song of tyhe Summer is insanely cooked and flop i dont even remember how it goes but i guess you could say its meant to be generic so like. no thoughts here. MY RATINGS:

SUMMER BLOCK BUSTER: 7/10 solid introduction banging song gotta get gone instrumental. saves the weaknesses

CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MOM: 10/10. he found me crying. he crew too. we both crode

final assessment - were these episodes MADE for me?: yes. its new phineas and ferb i think i can say they thought of me when they were making phineas and ferb. who wouldnt.

SUBMARINE SANDWICH SUBMARINE/LICENSE TO BUST

I GOT A LICENSE TO BUST FULL THROTTLE FULL THRUST GOT ,Y PEDAL TO THE METAL GONNA EAT MY DUST. Ok back to the first one

I was really really excited for submarine sandwich submarine for 1 entire day when they dropped the screenshot of isabella and buford standing next to eachother because i foolishly believed they would have the plot centered around them beefing which i live for if you know me at all. BUT!! Idk it was just kinda an episode.

It really felt like an s4 plot in the sense of a really hard reach for a big idea. Im telling you my bermuda triangle idea from my beach art wouldve been better But like this was the next best thing. it even had wacky sandcastles. Umm the jessimpsons predicted submarine sandwich submarine. The fish was ugly as hell

I can really tell which episodes i liked the most based on how many screenshots or clips i took and this ones an outlier because i found everything baljeet was doing in this episode to be mega cute.

look at him go............ hungry for a cheese and pummelled by olive...

LICENSE TO BUST was a lot of fun too im so proud of my sweet little candace for getting her drivers licensed when faced with the adversary of a balding man. the SONG made the episode for me she ate that shit up thats for later though

LAWRENCE NOT THINKING SHES GONNA PASS WAS SO FUNNY WHATS HIS PROBLEM.................. HAVE FAITH IN YOUR BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL OK.. also the gecko gear was so cute i want it so bad... but i think id get stuck to myself and wither up like a sad little freak.

and ferb has literally perished.

I LOWKEY DID NOT EXPECT HER TO PASS I CANT EVEN LIE. The twist that mr. driving guy is also a candacetype is funny but does this mean she passed her test via bias. what does this mean for the future of danvilles road safety? We'll never know cause she goes right back to riding her bike in the episodes after this. (read like cinemasins please)

oh and also while im here. im usually an A-plot only andy so ill probably only talk about doof and perrys plot if its PARTICULARLY funny or engaging to me (no arguments against this this is my protest for every b plot guy that ignores a plots existence. we have to balance it out or we're all gonna die ok?) and this one was.

Hes literally so real ITS LEGAL ITS ENTRAPMENT. KILL YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE LIGHTS ARE GREEN !!! heinz is a good name for a boy or a girl. DOOF WAS ACTUALLY REALLY REALLY FUNNY IN THESE EPISODES i was worried considering how bad he got near the end with like owca files doof and mml doof but MAN I WAS WRONG. SO WRONG. HES FUNNY AGAIN!!!!! BUT ILL GET TO THOSE WHEN WE GET TO MY STANDOUTS LOL. MY RATINGS:

Submarine Sandwich Submarine: 7/10. Over-animated isabella and buford scene will feed me for the rest of my life, baljeet attacked by various foods. Song mid though it was like a worse version of the sea shanty hng song

License to Bust: 9/10 IT WAS REALLY GOOD AND HAD A GREAT SONG.. The callback to her parralel parking fiasco and the Shenanigans was sooo much fun. Now that im here doesnt the intro of license to bust also sound like fred vs fred. whos better at paintball whos better at pool. whos better at driving her car safely near a school. idk just workshopping it.

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: license to bust maybe not but subsandsub was really fun and 24fps buford animation makes me feel seen. 1 out of 2 score.

DRY ANOTHER DAY/DECONSTRUCTING DOOF

UNFORTUNATELY. neither of these clicked with me very much........... DESPITE THIS. DECONSTRUCTING DOOF MAY HAVE ONE OF MY TOP 3 NEW SONGS. GOOD AS FUCK but dry another day is first so shhhhhhhhhhh

this episode we see a character made because they want to keep writing veronica hill from hng but theyre in different parts of danville so they got this new weird guy in. and also a really hot day episode where theyre all sitting under the tree im litrally ghostwriting this show

microorganisms. they need some wawer. baljeet get out of the sun. and the zebra is back. and he drinks boba.. Now i feel like hes part of the mortal realm hes real. and candace reacts with JOY when she speaks to him i thought she BEEFS WITH THIS ZEBRA. Something must have happened between them over the 9 months they mustve reached some kind of peace agreement.

i also really love this karmic cycle buford and baljeet have going on in this season where as soon as one of them gets a moment to gloat over the others misfortune they also immediately eat shit. It makes me laugh every time i was literally hoping so much their dynamic this season would be them breaking chairs over eachothers heads and i think my dream came true.. also what was with the ferbjeet crumbs in this one. (Pic of the riddler) what is he cooking.

SO CUTE... The song in this one didnt really stick out to me that much i couldnt remember it at all. this ones less of a s4 flop song and more of a HNG flop song which is a different ballpark entirely..

NOT MUCH TO SAY. IT WAS A FINE LITTLE JAUNT I HAD FUN WITH IT AND THATS WHAT MATTERS. Its definitely not a skip-on-rewatch episode but its not lifechanging either.

Deconstructing doof is one of the 3 only episodes that i felt some semblance of negativity over. It wasnt bad by any means the therapist going crazy over discovering the truth was a lot of fun and i did have a good time with the episode but like. idk. the leadup was great i just didnt really like the ending it soured it in my brain

the bits where hes investigating and piecing things together is really fun and i love when hes interviewing all the kids and pnfs family. and isabellas like Hes a Genius :-). buford pulls the Im not talking to any cops move. and baljeet performs the candace reddit psychoanalysis.

what makes me think this episode didnt really resonate with me is that. i usually take screenshots. i took ONE. In this ENTIRE EPISODE. i took ONE MEAGRE SCREENSHOT AND ITS THIS

that aside though the song may be in my top 3 s5 songs. i LOVE doo wop songs and omfg this one was so fun. another candace and doof duet.. WAITER WAITER ILL TAKE SECONDS.. THIRDS.. FOURTHS. WHEN HE GOES I THINK I HAVE A THEORYYYYYYY. he ate . and seeing norm and nessa hanging out with doof is so cute im so happy norm is like. Around.

i hope he gets a bigger part eventually but i take what i can get thats my special guy. THE ENTIRE ROLEPLAY PART WAS SO FUNNY. WHYD HE GIVE NORM PAPER JUST FOR HIM TO NOT SAY OR DO ANYTHING. EXIT STAGE LEFT

and the flying disco blimp sequence SO CUTE i rlly thought that was just gonna be its own episode. the song was GREAT and their little dancemoves were so cute i cry.....

buford hitting the 'artist drawing character floating in the void cool-style pose here. MY RANKING:

DRY ANOTHER DAY: 6/10. inoffensive theres nothing much going on here. its just an s4 episode to be honest. great balls of water solos

DECONSTRUCTING DOOF: 8/10 despite my hangups i can tell this is gonna be considered a legendary episode and i love the song so i cant really complain. Its a great concept and i think they did it well theres just something rotten in my heart

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: no these arent beehunterkisser episodes for sure. My battle does not lie here.. onward.. HUZZA

TROPEY MCTROPEFACE/BIBLIO BLAST!

Remember when we thought this was gonna be a ferb centric episode. and it instead turned out to be a zoetrope centric episode. maybe theyre more similar than we thought.. just something to make you think haha....

ANYWAY. MAN THAT EPISODE WAS FUNNY. THERES SO MUCH FUCKING NONSENSE I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN... MICHAEL BUBBLE...... HES HERE.

Im not used to michael buble singing anything thats not a christmas song tbh but he kind of ate this This is one of the ones thats been stuck in my head since i watched it. Episodes like this that center on some random object and what it gets up to are some of my FAVOURITES and this ones no exception its so fucking funny.

something i, as local pnf tumblr buford guy would like to point out, is that biffany got a new voice and a new design. Im kinda sad she doesnt sound like she smokes 30 packs a day anymore because that was such a vibe but THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER. I WAS LAUGHING SO FUCKING HARD

THATS THEIR FAMILY GARB. THEIR HERITAGE. Im so obsessed. i am also pretty happy that there is still no sign of anyone from bufords other side of the family so they didnt forget the lore tidbit that he comes from a broken home. The family get together from that one other pnf episode where all his family look like normal skinny background incidentals is so dead to me now. THIS is the real shit. lets all go cut down this tree. doesnt one of them look like vargskelethor joel anyway back to tropeface.

the drama.. the heartbreak.. michael bubble.. im so glad that tropey got to be with his beautiful ferris wheel wife and have triplets and the buford is a fat little hamster allegations are confirmed true. this was kinda the point in the season where i eralised hey isnt he like in this season a LOT. did they do it for me?

honest i dont even know what to say. its so serene its so beautiful. tropey has lived such a full and vast life. hes been through so much. im glad he finally gets to relax. At peace with the world......finally. Sorry to phinabella fans for this one though im keeping you in my thoughts

biblio blast was also a lot of fun it was kinda done dirty by being after the bombshell that was tropey BUT it was a giood time. IM EATING IM A PLANT IM A PLANT PLANT PLANT

THEYRE so cute i literally get so happy when they stand next to eachother. baljeet autism handsing i know what you are.

Again this is apparently the season of buford so we got him shitting on metamorphosis because edgar allen poe is his oshi or whatever which made me laugh a lot. ISABELLA DOING A BRITISH ACCENT WAS SO CUTE ALSO When she and buf banter it gives me life. yes it happens one other time this season its really great guys. things are looking up for me. ALSO DOOF WAS SO SO FUNNY IN THIS ONE. HEINZ HAS NO CLOROPHYLLLLLL UGHHHH THATS SO EMBARASSING FOR HIM. SO EMBARASSING.

The doof plants are really cute i like them id have one in my house but i guess id have to muzzle it but that feels inhumane. so i guess i have to let them live in the wild.. free.. like a bird.. if a bird was a plant.....

The song for this episode also has hng disease in that the vocal mixing is really strange. i had the same problem with strawberry festival im not sure why it happens it just isnt all that nice to listen to. the VISUALS were so cute tho theyre so cute... my little friends! MY RANKING:

TROPEY MCTROPEFACE: 10/10 Oh my Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood Its PEAK

BIBLIO BLAST: 6.5/10 Good innocent fun but not quite memorable enough to be a 7. if baljeet got to kill more itd be different.

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: YES SIR. Buford lore scraps a funny circle and plants. i love all these things. these are beehunterkisser episodes for sure

A CHIP TO THE VET/MORE THAN JUST AN INTERN

this damn episode. Its so bad.

I cant even lie. I did not enjoy it. but it wasnt quite the worst episode so i guess it has that going for it.

The stakes of perry getting a chip were completely dumb and not good. i thought theyd realise the potential of this but perry gets out of getting a chip thru being a platypus and not cartoon hijinks sio basically im gonna die. i was left feeling desolate and alone after this flop and then carl shows up like an angel and brings me to a new beautiful world. thats what these 2 paired up means

the song was pretty decent i do love sophia james singing voice and her work on HNG were always the best songs so it obviously translates over. The littel dance bits with the animals are so cute phineas is literally so cockatiel coded its adorable. and i do love to see a fireside girl or two. believe it or not i genuinely took no pictures of these episodes on my first watch; chip because it sucked and i just wanted it to be over and more than just an intern because it was so damn good i didnt even think of it.

highlight of this episode was probably buford flirting with jeremy. this means he has a crush on both candace and jeremy. whats his play. what does he think hes doing.

let him keep it its cute. and isabella confirmed baldy. IM trying to avoid talking about the goat scream joke because it makes me want to throttle somebody just know it fucking sucks and i hate it. anyway The song guys :). i do really like im just gonna excema this room. i might say that one irl some day its real good. guys im just so apathetic to this episode. its not real...

MORE THAN JUST AN INTERN however is VERY MUCH REAL. ive really really wanted a carl episode for a long time cause hes one crazy son of a bitch. and it makes em wanna attack monogram. but i know some people genuinely hate monogram but i like how shitty he is because its funny LOL.. sorry carl......

i made a really bad joke to one of my friends when they were saying that doof always smelled like fish and i mean im not gonna disclose that here becuase this is a family friendly review but the connontations of this sentence tells you everything. and carl is canonically microchipped.. in case he gets lost... so sweet

THE RETURN OF THE CARL THE INTERN SONG WAS REALLY GREAT I WAS HAPPY WHEN I HERD IT. I do love a good callback and this one wasnt forced or nothing thats just his theme song. but NEW

i have an engineering degree..

IT WAS SO MUCH FUN TO SEE CARL GET SOME RECOGNITION FOR HIS INSANE FUCKED UP WORK ETHIC AND IT FELT SO GOOOOOD TO WATCH HIM BLOW UP AT MONOGRAM AND FOR HIM TO ACTUALLY LISTEN FOR ONCE. WOW.. THINGS ARE A CHANGING

the ending was genuinely really sweet and carl getting to be some sort of weird part of the Monogram family like he wanted to is really nice to see.. carl win.. your strange fixation on approval from your boss has become Something New. MY RANKINGS:

A CHIP TO THE VET: 3/10 this couldve been something. you couldve done something. but you didnt. 3 points for sophia james banger

MORE THAN JUST AN INTERN: 10/10 HOOOWEEE MAMA. SWEET MAMA. THATS A GOOD EPISODE RIGHT THERE SON.

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: a chip to the vet was made to make me mad. carl episode wasnt for me because im not the carl guy but if it was itd totally be for me.

THE AURORA PERRY-ALIS/LORD OF THE FIRESIDES

made me scared. i have an irrational fear of when characters get shrunk down really small in cartoons and get eaten. i dont actually know if monty ate them but i saw enough and got scared and skipped like half the episode. Idk the context of the booger napkin and i never will journey to the center of candace finally has a 2nd episode to join it in my 'scared' tier in my pnf episode tier list.

OK ASIDE FROM THAT. I really liked it. seeing montnessa again and getting a reason for why they kinda fizzled out was great and i really hope they do more with their relationship. The scene with the aurora was BEAUTIFUL AND I LOVED THE LIGHTING and i quite liked the song it was niceys i just checked its sophia james again i shouldve known. ITS SO NICE

i could make them butchfemme. all hope is not lost. i can imagine anything.. and the sweet lil family moments with the flynn fletchers was awesome lawrence joining the conga line and getting rlly into it made me giggle. love you Bro

cause i missed half this episode due to getting scared we are just gonna go to lord of the firesides. IT HAD SO MUCH GOING FOR IT. AND THEN IT JUST FLOPPED RIGHT AT THE END

Gretchen declaring anarchy was so funny she was being such a little shithead. i like to think that shes just Like that sometimes even without a plot convenient inator because obviously girls would never fight like that on their own accord . ALSO ISABELLA SHOVING PNF OUT AND BEING LIKE YOU CANT SEE US LIKE THIS AHAHAHAHA

i LOOOOOOVED THE SONG IT WAS SUCH A SURPRISE and i love it when GIRLS kill eahcother but like i was genuinely really disappointed by this one. i thought it was gonna be something but it like was not. much.

I GENUIENLY THOUGHT ID HAVE MORE TO SAY. I THOUGHT WED GET MORE ABOUT THE FIRESIDE GIRLS AS INDIVIDUALS. YEAH NO That wont ever happen. Oh Whell Guys....... Oh well.. (kicks rock) oh well.....

calling all besties......KILL. MY RANKINGS:

AURORA PERRY-ALIS: scared/10. i cant really rank this one on good conscience. it made me scared

LORD OF THE FIRESIDES: 6/10. really really disappointed but ignoring what i wanted from it its still a really solid and funny episode.. im sure itll grow on me but i guess i just wanted them to fight for real. Its a shame

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: NO SIR! NO SIR THEY WERENT. i got let down

THE CANDACE SUIT/AGENT T FOR TEEN

Well. we are finally here. im sure it is genuinely no surprise to anyone that the candace suit was my favourite episode of the entire batch and even made it to my top 5 pnf episodes ever. there was just so much good buford.

Why the FUCK did he show up in his garage in a purple velvet bathrobe smoking a pipe. whered he get that. they put bubbles in it but i wouldnt have even batted an eye if he was just like acutally smoking atp. IT WAS SO FUNNY. WHYS HE A CRIME BOSS

ladies. to what do i owe this pleasure. what the hell man i need to draw this fit. ALSO BALJEET BEING IN ON IT AND BEING PROUD OF THE FACT THAT THERES A FUCKING BALJEET HOMUNCULI TEA PARTY ROOM WHERE SOME OF THEM ARE SUSPENDED IN THE AIR BY CHAINS AND HANDCUFFS. ITS FUCKED UP WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THEM. i love it. They couldnt have done better.

The suit shenanigans in the episode were so fucking funny but maybe the biggest highlight to me was that THE SONG LEAK TRICKED US. IT WAS SUNG BY BUFORD??? I THOUGHT IT WAS A DANNY JACOB BANGER. Lowkey bobby gaylor ate with it Buford has a hard voice to sing in but it was REALLY good. Like it was reminding me of how lord hater sings in WOY it made me laugh so hard. Stealing jeremy from work . why

i did this when the leak came out but i have to REDO IT BECUASE BIFFANY GOT REDESIGNED AND THE SUIT IS WAY WAY WAY WAY MORE SINISTER. BUT I ALREADY KNOW ITS A BANGER

But ohhh my god it was so funny. Their idea of buford development is turning him into some kind of art freak that knows everything about everyone. he clones people in his garage. his moms ok with it bnc their family cuts trees down for fun so theyre all fucked up in the head. awesome. Literally so fucking awesome

This episode got so many laughs outta me and i loved isabella and buford making fun of candace together for literally no damn reason. SHIT STIRRERS. LETS WEAR OUR CANDACE SKIN AND MAKE FUN OF CANDACE. For an internet trend. Yay! anyone who hates this episode is weak minded and wouldnt survive the baljeet dungeon.

AGENT T FOR TEEN. Ok so i was sad my manifest didnt work but this was SOOOOOOOOOO GOOD. I love the video at the very start the vibes are immaculate and stacy and perry team up so cute and beautiful. you ARE a donny do-good stacy. with the scraps beforehand of them playing video games together its just so peak

so cute. HER GETTING HER OWN THEME SONG AT THE END I SQUEED. AND ALL OF HER RANDOM TALENTS.. How does she ever feel like shes not enough for her mother shes insane at everything. she can even be a dolphin. GENUINELY THIS WAS EVERYTHING I WANTED AND MORE. SHE JUST JUMPS INTO ACTION FOR PERRY SHES SO NICE... and owca knows now.. and she gets a fedora AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ITS BEAUTIFUL ITS SO DAMN BEAUTIFUL

And its really nice to see dr hirano again she is So fine. mad about coltrane mention though hes not real no hes not sir.

i had predicted to myself shed have to cover for perry and keep candace away from him in some way. also dr diminutive and doof beefing is so funny. youre small. well youre uh divorced. shady af comebacks. its so good

I LOVE THIS EPISODE RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY RANKING:

THE CANDACE SUIT: FAVOURITE/10 I LOVE IT WHEN BUFORD DOES MORALLY QUESTIONABLE THINGS WITH NO REPROCUSSIONS. MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD I STARTED SILENTLY CRYING

AGENT T FOR TEEN: 10/10 NO NOTES. Stacy badass and awesome moments and shes friends with perry and its so beautiful. i have nothing intelligent to say its just genuinely so good.

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: YES BITCH. CANDACE SUIT WAS FOR ME. Buford van stomm why do you enjoy being candace (a girl) and living her life (girl life) so much. Much to think about. And STACY YAY

THE HABERDASHER/OUT OF CHARACTER

battle of the mid

Ok jokes aside i LIKED the character of the haberdasher but the most impressive and interesting part of that episode to me was the damn robot spider he was in at the start.

i love that hes steampunky and i love his earnest enthusiasm. hes a fun guy. this black beret really slays . Mothman doof was awesome also im really sad the mothman song was seemingly scrapped becuase i loved it But like YAY AWESOME BUG MAN. I didnt like whatever he was doing with his voice but i kinda forgot abt it after a while so like. WHO CARS.

this is the most ive ever related to doof because back in my youth i used to chew on fabric because i thought it tasted reall;y good. sometimes i crave it. like how he tried to eat socks.

The song that REPLACED THE moth man song..hoo boy. i have a hat for that was almost a good song but the pacing was just kind of off for me it felt like it was moving too fast and then would randomly slow down and then just kick off again and i was left afraid and alone.

I DO LIKE HOW HE CAN JUST TURN HIS SHOP INTO A DINKY CAR how come he has a totally different aesthetic to owca. i guess hes friends with professor elemental from real life and phineas and ferb. much to think about. hes a sweet guy and i wonder if hell ever show up again. ALSO THE SUBPLOT OF THE KIDS BUILDING SOMETHING WITHOUT PNF WAS SOOO CUTE. Buford bringing back the Thingy from cloudy made me laugh a lot. and him being like cant lie guys we're shit.

ITS SO GOOD i really want more episodes where its just them 3 because i feel like theres untapped potential. (buford isabella guy voice) particularly one dynamic in particular (hooked off stage by a cane)

Out of character was also really fun as someone who was raised into a star trek loving household . The set was REALLY fun and baljeet being so excited for acting was adorable i wanna pinch his cheeks. also buford movie interest scraps slowly making me like that career path for him so good job guys.

The song was kinda un memorable for me i do like whenever baljeet gets a solo of some kind but idk if this genre really worked with him he was just a bit shrill. I like that they tried to go for a patter-song type thing but i think with a patter song it needs to have yknow. the signature instruments. and the switch to the singers just doesnt work. Its flop im sorry my sweet little ball

also baljeets badass anime sakuga moment where he takes down the robot was awesome hes literally so iconic

HE DIDNT DESERVE TO LOSE HIS ROLE FOR BEING TOO GOOD!!!! FREE MY BOY! MY RANKING:

THE HABERDASHER: 6/10 i had a fun time but nothing really amazed me. I want moffman back.. sigh

OUT OF CHARACTER: 8/10 A LOT OF FUN. really cute character moments. I smiled and grinned I LOVE YOU BALJEET!! MY PRECIOUS BOY

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: Nahhhh not becuase theyre BAD or anything. i just dont go here. there are baljeet guys out there living their best lives and i cant pretend im allowed to be considered a baljeet guy. id just be a poseur. and im definitely not a doof guy. Im a tourist

THE CHRONICLES OF MEAP EPISODE 42: MEAP ME IN ST. LOUIS

its bad

MY RANKING:

THE CHRONICLES OF MEAP EPISODE 42: MEAP ME IN ST. LOUIS: its bad

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: stabbybarfpain you are one of the best songs ever written you deserved a better episode. my god

NO SLUMBER PARTY/THE BALLAD OF BUBBA DOOF

THIS WAS SOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE. BALJEET HAVING A 9:30 BEDTIME IS SO CUTE HES JUST A BABY. THE movie dome is the dream i was really hoping that hed get mega scared of the scary movie because umm idk rlly itd be cute. AND CANDACE STACY AND VANESSA HANGING OUT I COULD CRY.. ITS SO GOOD.. Vanessas outfit was great the mindy doll tanktop is so iconic and i kinda need it. Im really sad candace didnt get toi have much fun because she was so focused on busting.. but maybe in another world. in a fic my good friend wrote maybe. she could have fun. hint hint nudge nudge cometcrystal has a great slumber party big idea fic written before this episode dropped ANYWAY.

i HAVE to talk about it.

HIM HANGING OUT WITH THE GIRLS WAS SO CUTE AND HES LOWKEY IN DRAG MAKEUP... STACY SAYING SLAY QUEENIE GENUINELY MADE ME STOP BREATHING FOR A FEW SEOCNDS. s5 delivered so fucking hard on buford ive never been more vindicated as a buford fan. its literally all coming up milhouse.

the song was ALMOST really good but theres something about the takes they used for the second verse that is like grating. particularly isabellas AND THE SOUND SYSTEMS BOPPING where she sounsd like if a germ coiuld speak. WHYYYY DID THEY USE THAT TAKE. Buford eavesdropping on the girl gossip is literally so cute too i love him so much. hes so cute. ok but like genuinely the dancing in the last chorus the lipsyncing and movements are so horrifically bad they remind me of those inside out 2 songs. this is the phineas and ferb song yeah grab your friends and sing along. type shit. ASIDE FROM THAT ITS A REALLY CUTE BIT AND I LOEV HOW EVERYONE GETS A LINE

baljeet being woken up by the inator and immeditealy going back to sleep is so cute also i literally love him so much he gives me cuteness agression. THIS WAS A FUN EPISODE

Ok sleepmaster general its 9:29. next episode. THE BALLAD OF BUBBA DOOF is the other episode i felt real negativity for. i was really excited for the cowboy episode after i saw fullchains storyboards i thought it was like. an AU episode. but not only is the big idea convoluted and not in a fun way. I DIDNT EVEN GET ANY REAL COWBOY ACTION. I did like bubba doof though . Lunch :D.

i really dont have much to say about this one because like. this being the last one to watch and it flopping made me so mad. I did really like the kids outfits though they were so cute... the song was not memorable and kinda blew chunks. it just was generally . I DONT CAER ABOUT IT.. I DONT EVEN HAVE ANY PICTURES I HAVE TO GO TAKE ONE. WHAT THE HELL MAN. OK WAIT THERE IS A HIGHLIGHT. NED

NED HES SO CUTE.. NORM COUSIN.......AWWWWWWWWWWW COME AN GET IT LITTLE FELLERS. i also liked the scene where monogram tastes perry. kind of fucked up considering they ate agent T if i was perry id be scared that hed like it HAHAHAHAHA.. ANYWAY MY RANKING

NO SLUMBER PARTY: 7/10 Its FUN AND CUTE. A little bit of wasted potential but nowhere near as bad as lord of the firesides. Its fine totally cute. i love seeing all these guys hang out, makes me Snile

THE BALLAD OF BUBBA DOOF: 3/10 idgaf guys. its wasted on me

final assesment - were these episodes MADE for me?: Slumber party yes. If im crazy enough i can taqke it as stanessa crumbs. and also whatevers going on with Buford. Its good. Bubba no sir.

FINAL VERDICT

its good as HELL!!!!!! ITS JUST LIKE OLD PNF BUT WITH NEW HUMOR AND MORE FREEDOM TO DO WHAT THEY WANT.

Its everything i wanted except the things i didnt get which i will soon get over. Im so happy with it I literally stayed up till 4am yesterday to finish it. Its SO GOOD.

and overall.. ido believe.. this season really was made for me. last year was year of shadow the hedgehog this year its year of buford van stomm BITCHES

[pftones3482]

The Good

All right - I've had time to collect my thoughts on the new season. I'm going to split them into two posts: The Good and the Not So Good/Bad, just because I know some people don't want to focus on the negatives for shows.

If you want to read my "Not So Good/Bad" opinions, you can read this post.

But for the things I loved about this season, in no particular order, click the "Keep Reading!" Under a cut for spoilers, obviously (and featuring some screenshots)

The voice acting was impeccable. Every single person who came back for their role did an amazing job (but we knew that would be the case)

I was so SO happy they kept in their trend of putting things over the end credits - I was really worried they wouldn't continue that because it's not really a thing anymore, since people don't tend to watch end credit scenes on streaming platforms

Literally everything Stacy and Perry related. I expected "Agent T for Teen" would be my favorite episode, but it was so fun and silly and I'm so happy with how it ended up overall. I loved the Stacy lore drop, and I am SO BEYOND PLEASED that they made them friends. I genuinely think I would have hated this season if they hadn't made the Teal Duo besties

I really enjoyed the amount of Buford content?? It felt like he played a more prominent role in this season

Same thing as above but with Linda - I'm glad they didn't just give her the whole "I want to spend time with my family" spiel in the first episode and then ignore it. She's clearly trying to spend more time with her kids.

Finally acknowledging that Carl definitely has another job(s), and letting him lay into Monogram. I do think there's more to be said for that situation, but I'm glad we got something

The animation overall! There were some parts that felt a little off to me, but for the most part I enjoyed that they kept the character designs the same and stuck with the simple charm of the show

The Haberdasher. Full stop, I want him to come back. I love that he's a spoof on the Mad Hatter, his energy was fun

The episode "License to Bust" is now up there in one of the most solid episodes of all time. It hit all the right notes in a satisfying way. (Also also did anyone else notice the instructor smile after Candace told him to buckle up? It took me four tries to get a screen shot it was so fast lol)

(he's smiling I swear, go back and look at his face for the rest of the driving test)

Ferb food critic was COMICAL (and again with the spoofing of Disney characters, there was a lot of that in this season!)

"Apparently his mother didn't teach him........well, a lot of things. WHICH is why we all have a job!" - I laughed for a solid minute after that line

On that note: "And I thought you were crazy for putting tank treads on a Whack-a-Pest!"

The kids all supporting Candace this season was really cute (she literally didn't make the 'sand castle' but they still cheered for her lol)

"He has a hard out at noon" and then Perry going home and smiling contently while Candace gives him a bath, please they're so cute

Continuing the trend of lines I liked, "I forgot Agent W was missing" in regards to the agents getting de-wormed fucking KILLED me (and was a great callback to earlier in the season when Doof was like "Maybe he has worms!" in the vet episode)

Setting Candace up to be a lawyer in the future

Carl and Brittany's beef (I love Brittany I've only had her for 27 seconds but I want to keep her)

Every single scene with Lawrence, actually. Love that silly man

I genuinely really loved "The Aurora Perry-alis." I've seen some conflicting thoughts on it from folks, but I think it was a nice way to reintroduce Montnessa, it let them tell the audience "hey, we didn't forget about Stacy and Perry," and the animation was really pretty. It also felt like it could fit nicely into Season 3 or 4, which was kind of how I was judging the episodes individually.

My Overall Favs:

Agent T for Teen, The Aurora Perry-alis, and License to Bust

And finally, also in no order, some of my favorite screenshots I took (minus the ones with Stacy and Perry together bc I already posted those and Tumblr has it's limits lol)

Anyway, if you want to know my thoughts on anything specific, you're more than welcome to shoot me an ask!

[darkwitchoferie]

Jealousy

Pairing: Bang Chan/gn!Reader

Summary: You've been dating Chan for a while and he takes you as his date to a JYPE party. There, he notices how close you are to Felix and jumps to some conclusions.

Tags: Y/N used for reader, they/them and you/your pronouns used, text screenshots, angst with a happy ending, unintentional self-harm

Master list

This is my first RPF and I'm a bit nervous about posting it, but here goes. Also link to read it on AO3.

Felix, watching the text exchange from the other side of your phone, huffed. “Gimme a minute,” he muttered. You watched him stride through the crowded company party then watched as Chan caught sight of him, turned on his heel and strode away, leaving through a back door. Felix followed. You stood still, watching that door, waiting for the two of them to come back.

You were pulled from your trance by a soft hand on the middle of your back. You turned to see Jisung standing beside you. From your other side, Minho said, “Chan Hyung wants us to take you home.”

“No,” you shook your head violently, but didn’t fight when the pair of them gently steered you out of the JYP party and to Minho’s waiting car.

Jisung climbed into the back with you, while Minho drove to your apartment. “What happened, sweetheart?”

“I…. I think…” your words hitched on an unexpected sob, “he broke up with me.” You collapsed, curling into Jisung’s waiting arms. You didn’t really remember the rest of the car ride. You vaguely remembered hearing Minho swear in the driver’s seat and you knew they must have gotten your home and stayed a little while with you, because you woke the next morning with a note beside your bed telling you that they had an early schedule and couldn’t stay the whole night but that they’d talk to Chan.

------

Chan had been, not exactly standoffish, but less present than he usually was in the days after the JYP party, especially when Felix was around. He’d clam up the second the other Aussie walked into the room. Minho and Jisung tried first to get him to talk to them, then the others one by one, but he’d just shrug them off and avoid their questions. Finally, after a solid week, the other seven members decided they’d had enough.

Keeping Felix at the back of the group, out of Chan’s direct line of sight, they cornered him in his own bedroom.

“Alright, we’ve had enough. What’s going on?” Minho started.

“Excuse me?”

“Hyung, something’s wrong. We all know it. Just….” Hyunjin trailed off.

“It’s not…. Don’t worry about it. Look,” Chan sought out Felix, knowing he had to be there with the others, and for the first time in a week spoke directly to him. “I can be happy for you, really. It’ll just take some time, that’s all. It’s not like I don’t get it. I know how incredible they are.”

“Hang on, hang on.” Felix interrupted. “You’re not seriously suggesting I, what, stole your partner? Are you? I mean, I saw the texts but I thought maybe you were drinking or something stupid. But you’re serious.”

“You say that like you two being together is outrageous. Listen, I know what I look like, okay? I know what you look like. And I mean,” he shrugged, looking away from the whole group. “It’s not like I can fault either one of you.”

“I saw your texts to them, at the party,” Felix repeated. “But I don’t understand. We’re all affectionate with each other. All the time. What was different this time?”

“If you stopped loving them, and this is some weird way of showing it, they deserve to know,” Jeongin said softly, when he didn’t respond to Felix right away.

“Of course I still love them. That’s not – it’s just –” he scrubbed a hand through his hair, before looking back at Felix. “You two look like you belong together, and I know I don’t.”

“You idiot.” Minho pulled out his phone, quickly swiped open his photo gallery and clicked on a photo. “Do you see that ridiculously sappy smile on their face? You put that there. And this one, and this one,” he flicked through more candid shots he’d gotten of the two of them. “What about this one? That stupidly fond look isn’t directed at Yongbok, they’re looking at you.”

Chan just stared down at Minho’s phone, eyes slowly widening in dawning horror at his screw up.

Felix strode past the other members, pulling out his phone, and gently nudging Minho so he moved. “They blocked me, Chris.” He held out his phone, the last text Y/N sent to him displayed on the screen.

“I can’t call them, or text them. The times I’ve tried, from anyone else’s phones, they hung up as soon as they heard my voice.”

“They stopped answering our calls too,” Seungmin added.

“And the door, when we went to check on them,” Changbin sighed.

“They haven’t been in to work all week,” Hyunjin said. “We tried that, four days ago, and yesterday.”

“Oh God,” Chan dropped to his bed, horror and guilt warring on his face. “Oh God. I fucked up. I fucked up so bad. What do I do? Shit!”

“Don’t you have a key to their place?” Jisung suggested.

A very short while later, after possibly breaking a traffic law or two, Chan turned his spare key in the lock to your apartment. The living room was quiet and dark, the blinds in the kitchen pulled down so no light filtered in. He slid off his shoes and, after double checking that you weren’t in the kitchen, made his way to your bedroom.

When Chan eased open your bedroom door, he expected to find you asleep despite the early hour. What he did not expect to find was the person he loved, curled around and clutching the Wolf Chan he’d given you like it was the only thing keeping you alive, and softly crying. You didn’t turn or even seem to notice that your door opened. Quickly, with the guilt building impossibly higher, he strode across to the bed, sliding into the space behind you and wrapping his arm around you. This made things worse as a sob that wracked your body tore from your throat followed by a wail that seemed to pierce his soul.

You didn’t hear your front door open, nor your bedroom door. So when Chan climbed into the bed behind you, you couldn’t hold back your reaction. It was the first time you’d imagined him being there this strongly, so strongly that you smelled his cologne though it had long faded from the plushie you clutched. In your low moments, like right before you fell asleep or right as you were waking, you imagined that nothing had happened and that he would be there in your bed. Then of course, you’d open your eyes and he wouldn’t be. You’d pictured him walking through your apartment door so often that any vague sound of footsteps in your building’s hallway was enough to get you to perk up, until they always passed by.

“Noooo,” you wailed, curling even tighter around Wolf Chan.

Chan tightened his hold around your waist, pulling you more firmly against him. “What can I do?” He muttered against the back of your head. “How can I fix this?”

You stilled, sobs hiccupping to a stop almost immediately, feeling the way his voice rumbled in his chest against your back and the pressure of his arm around your waist. You looked down to see his arm was really around you. “Chan?”

“I’m here. I’m sor –”

Instantly, your sadness was replaced by white hot fury. You struggled, doing your utmost to pull yourself out of his grip. Not wanting to hurt you more, he let go so you could move. Jumping off your bed, you whirled around to face him. “You LEFT. ME. For a week! I haven’t heard anything for a week, Christopher!” Part of you registered, and was pleased to see, the flinch when you said his full English name, but mostly you kept yelling at him, still clutching your Wolf Chan. As you yelled at him, Chan slid off your bed and moved to kneel on the carpet in front of you. “Not a word! Not a ‘hey I need time’ or even a ‘yeah, we’re actually broken up’. NOTHING. For a week, you left me here alone! Alone and unsure if the man I love even cared about me anymore.” You felt the sob hitch in your chest, and pressed your hand to your mouth in the hopes of keeping hold of your anger and not letting any more sobs out. But it was no use, the anger faded almost as quickly as it’d come. “Why? What did I ever do to deserve that?” You asked, voice small and fragile in a way you hated.

“I am so sorry,” he looked up at you and a small piece of you was pleased to see tears swimming in his eyes. “You did nothing. You didn’t deserve that. It was all me, all my own head. I….” he sighed, roughly rubbing the palms of his hands over his jeans. “I thought…. I saw you and Lix talking and laughing and at first it was fine, it was good even. You looked so good in that outfit and the light hit you perfect, and you were laughing. And I thought how lucky I was that you wanted me.” Blinking, the tears in his eyes finally started to fall though there was no sign of them in his voice. “And you tipped your head against him, laughing still, like you’ve done I don’t even know how many times. Hell, like I’ve done countless times. And I thought, ‘God, they look so good together’. And then, I dunno, it spiraled. And I started to wonder why you were with me at all when clearly you were happy hanging out with Lix, and he’s definitely prettier than me, and you two look so good together. And I remembered when I’m at the studio late, Lix checks on you, makes sure you have dinner. Comes over sometimes so you’re not lonely. And I made it into something it’s not. I know he does that for anybody he cares about.”

He sighed deeply, looking down and clutching the denim over his thighs for just a second. “So I hurt you. I need…. It’s important that you know that I tried to hurt you on purpose. I meant for you to be mad at me, maybe hate me. I thought… I dunno, that maybe it would make moving on with Lix easier for you if you were mad at me.” You dropped to the floor, overwhelmed and no longer able to hold yourself up anymore. The sound of you hitting the ground caused Chan to look back at you again. “I don’t know which one I’m more sorry for. For saying what I said to hurt you, or for ignoring you after that. You did nothing, absolutely nothing to deserve any of it. It was all me, my own mind against me.”

The room was silent for a few minutes, tears slowly drying on both your faces. “Now what?” You asked, hesitantly.

“You could stop strangling Wolf Chan?” Chan responded softly, the slightest hint of his usual teasing in his voice. The slightest smile tugged at the corner of your lips as you finally released your stranglehold on your plushie. “Could I…. Can I come closer?” You nodded, shifting to sit crisscross. Chan shuffled closer on his knees, spreading his knees wide so one was on either side of your legs when he reached you.

When he leaned closer, like he was going to hug you, you pulled back. “No, it’s – I haven’t showered in…. I’m not really sure when I showered last, actually,” you explained, intending to soothe the hurt look that passed over his face.

Instead, the guilt deepened then morphed to concern. “When was the last time you ate? Like really ate a meal?” You were quiet a minute, then shrugged. He sighed. “I’m sorry, my love. I’m sorry for doing this to you. For making you feel like this.”

“My love?” You asked for confirmation, tears threatening again.

“Yes, you are. You never stopped being… I never stopped loving you. I don’t think I can.” You leaned forward, resting your head on his chest, then cringing away again when you remembered you had been the entire week without a shower. “Come on, let’s get you in the shower. Then, how about pizza and a movie?”

“Okay,” you agreed softly.

Standing up, and offering one hand to help you stand too, Chan pulled his phone out of his back pocket. After a few rings, presumably the pizza place picked up. But you were wrong in your assumption. “Hey Lix. Can you pick up a couple pizzas and come over here? Yeah, we did. Yes. Like 45 minutes? Okay, see you soon.” He hung up and tossed his phone onto your bed.

“Lix?”

“He misses you. They all do, but Lix felt guilty until they all cornered me. Is that okay? That he comes over?” You nodded. “You should unblock him too.”

“I will, after a shower. I feel gross now.” A little unsteady on your feet after barely eating and staying mostly in bed for a week, you let Chan help you into the bathroom. Once you were actually in the glass encased shower stall, hot water cascading over muscles that were sore from disuse, Chan turned to leave and give you privacy. “No!” He spun back around to face you. “Don’t leave me.”

The desperation and pain in your voice pulled him to you as if by a magnet. “Can I…?” he gestured to the closed shower door.

“Please.” He stripped down quickly, then crowded into your space as he joined you in the shower. Thoroughly soaked, and thus feeling less gross, you wrapped your arms around his waist, pressing your face to his shoulder. Quietly, you just breathed in the feeling of his skin against your own again.

After a few minutes, and still keeping an arm around you, Chan shifted you both so he was standing under the spray instead. Carefully, methodically, he shampooed your hair twice, then gently massaged your conditioner through it. He only made you step away from him long enough to thoroughly scrub your body, but made sure he kept his free hand on you.

Back in your room, Chan carefully rubbed you dry and you let him, both of you understanding it was both to help reconnect and a form of penance for him. He stepped away long enough to grab the shirt he had been wearing when he arrived and tugged it over your head. You lifted the shirt’s collar over your nose and breathed in deeply, the scent of his cologne calming you the way it always did, as he moved to your dresser to pull out clean underwear and sleep pants for you. He riffled through the bottom drawer, the drawer that was full of his clothes, to pull out something for himself as well.

A few minutes later, a knocked sounded on the front door and Chan stood from the couch to answer it, you following behind him. Chan took the pizza and drinks, then swiftly moved out of Felix’s way. The two of you held each other tightly for a moment. “Missed you, Sunflower,” Felix muttered against your shoulder.

“Missed you too, Sunshine.”

Hours later, with you sleeping with your head in his lap, forehead pressed against his abs, and Felix nodding off against you, Chan felt hopeful. He knew it would take more work to repair the damage he had caused, but now he knew he could do it.

[milling-around]

The Bad Batch Finale and Joel Aron’s cryptic tweet

Okay so Joel Aron, Director of Cinematography Lighting & VFX at Lucasfilm, tweeted this:

Initially, I thought that this was going to be the runtime of S3E15 The Cavalry Has Arrived. This episode being longer would make sense as it’s the finale of the show and it’s close in length to S1E1 Aftermath. However, I saw a screenshot floating around the other day that says the runtime of the final episode “spans 24 to 25 minutes”.

If this episode is the typical length then this timestamp must be referring to a different piece of media. The question is, what media? In an effort to determine what could happen in the finale, I went to that point in the films to see what I would find. None of them strike as much fear in me as what’s happening in A New Hope.

The Phantom Menace - Anakin has just won the pod race and they are celebrating his victory.

Attack of the Clones - Jango Fett and Boba Fett have just attacked Obi-Wan with seismic charges.

Revenge of the Sith - Anakin is looking out over Coruscant from the Jedi Council room. He has just revealed to Mace Windu that Palpatine is a Sith.

A New Hope - Before leaving to disable the tractor beam on the Death Star, Obi-Wan delivers a line which may foreshadow what’s to come in The Bad Batch.

Empire Strikes Back - Luke is trying to lift the ship out of the swamp on Dagobah.

Return of the Jedi - Luke, Han, and Chewbacca, along with the droids, are captured by the Ewoks.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars - Anakin and Ahsoka are heading towards Tatooine to deliver Jabba’s son back to him.

At 01:09:56:01 in A New Hope, or as close to it as I could get (Disney+ sucks) this is what we see:

Sorry it’s a photo of my computer, I don’t know how y’all take screenshots of Disney+.

“Your destiny lies along a different path from mine.”

Many people have been theorising that the show could end with the Batch and Omega surviving but being separated, either by choice or by circumstance. This line from A New Hope, as well as the fact that Omega’s voice actor, Michelle Ang, has described the ending as “bittersweet”, definitely make that a solid theory.

Maybe I’m barking up the wrong tree though. There’s also speculation about whether Omega is force sensitive, so maybe Luke using the force in Empire Strikes Back is the real clue. Despite Ventress not believing Omega to have a high m-count, and her not being one of Hemlock’s designated m-count specimens, we have seen characters with a low m-count who were capable of wielding the force. Sabine Wren, for example.

Still, Omega being force sensitive doesn’t prevent the theory that she gets separated from the Batch from being true. It could actually be a reason for that separation because she may pursue training or decide that her proximity to the Batch endangers them.

But wait, there’s more!

At this timestamp in S1E1 Aftermath, Omega is on the Marauder with the Bad Batch (minus Crosshair) and they’re setting off on what will be her first big adventure. Omega’s Theme is playing and she’s gazing out at space with child-like wonder. While they’ve just parted ways with Crosshair, the overall feeling in this scene is hopeful.

If the tweet is referring to this episode, it could mean that we get a wholesome Bad Batch family moment. Whether Tech is there or not may rely on CX-2 being unmasked. Perhaps it’s bittersweet because Tech truly is dead or because he’s alive but they cannot save him from the Empire. Or maybe it’s bittersweet for a whole host of other reasons.

Honourable mention

@kiffobaby also looked into what is happening at this timestamp if you combine the runtimes (including credits) of all episodes in clone relevant story arcs and didn’t really find anything of note. If credits were removed then it would put at us a different point in the arc, however it’s unlikely that we’d be looking for a timestamp in an arcs combined duration anyway.

If you’ve read this far, I love you and don’t worry, we’re almost done.

Secret 16th episode?

Seasons 1 and 2 each had 16 episodes which leads me to speculate that this timestamp could actually be the runtime of the final episode, a secret 16th episode.

Is it likely? No. Can I dream? Yes.

[eddisfargo]

Doing this now because I am LITERALLY in capable of doing anything not at the last possible minute, and because this contest ends on Nov 1 (if it's EST I'm coming in a solid 2 hours before the deadline, unless it ends earlier today, in which case the real prize was the arte I made along the way!)

So, my all-time fave, @meganwhalenturner is doing a contest to win a signed set of the gorgeous new QT editions!

One of the things she requested was a new version of an old fanart, to see how much you've improved. Don't mind if I do! As the self-appointed High Priestess of the Mole God, I make strictly incredible arte.

Way back in June of 2020, I created my first QT fanart pretty much by accident. I remember a legitimately incredibly talented artist had just drawn something with a lot of stairs, and was mentioning that it had been a bit of a pain. So I kindly offered her a tutorial on easy stair drawing:

(Quoth a younger me: draw a line. 90 degree turn. 90 degree turn. 90 degree turn. voila!)

I drew a quick sketch, that I then thought it would be funny to turn into a depiction of the same scene.

And I was right! It was hilarious!

But since that day four years ago, I think I've really come into my own as an artist.

(For added hubris, I'm writing this before I've finished the new version of the picture).

Please see under the cut for my new techniques!

Note my new talents!!

I've learned to draw perfect circles, freehand!

I've become acquainted with the magic of speech bubbles!

Action shots suggest MOVEMENT!

Sometimes people have HANDS! (Sometimes)

I got rid of that little screenshot square from the first one!

I have forgotten what clothes are!

Are goats different than sheep? Probably not, right?

Thank you for coming on this journey with me.

[cryingpariah]

Morgans being accidentally added to the World Government's snail chat planning to unleash Uranus upon Alabasta as blackmail to lure out Vivi

(Saw the news today and thought a) 'holy shit, we live in the stupidest fucking timeline' and b) 'holy shit, Oda has the potential to do the funniest fucking thing in tandem with Wapol eventually spilling the beans on Imu')

With this new digital wave the world is on, no one stresses the importance of having your read receipts off than Morgans. You never know when you might strike headline gold but still need a solid alibi!

He is immediately commiting every message to paper (he doesn’t remember if it will notify the chat if he screenshots or not and also he doesn’t remember how to take a screenshot) cackling all the while! If you think he’s voluntarily removing himself from that chat you’ve got another thing coming! You’ll need to drag his feathery ass outta there!

10-15 minutes after being booted he makes a call to Marine HQ asking about some odd notification he received about being removed from a chat he’s very sure he never joined to begin with! He plays the role of indignantly ignorant when pressed about the chat, the audacity! Everyone in the world knows the name of his game is print! This newfangled tech wasn’t even close to up his alley, he barely knew how to work it!

This works almost perfectly but he still gets a summons to Marineford, which he both expected and wanted of course. It’s so much easier to give someone the ol rigamarole if it’s face to face.

As for the actual information he share it with Vivi in a very ‘I know something you don’t know~’ way that only momentarily distracts the princess from freaking out and prematurely turning herself in.

“Keep your cool Princess. You’ll be of no use to your people locked inside Mariejoa.”

“I'M NO USE TO THEM RIGHT NOW! I NEED TO DO SOMETHING!”

Thankfully Morgans's had his apprentice to deal with their problem clientele (or in this case, just a problem). Heading to Alabasta would give away their current edge but specially editing the newspaper bound for the royal palace with some secret messages and warnings? Both sly and doable.

Hide their stowaways in plain sight takes a couple hours (and unfortunately yet another Munch Munch Factory) but by the time they land, Morgans can quite certain he could get away with yet another egregious violation of ethics, morals and integrity and another world stopping headline.

[shwubudemon]

tldr: YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW THIS HURT ME IM ACTUALLY CRYING VICTIM IS JUST MOTIVATED AND BROKEN

also excuse my atrocious screenshotting i am literally hyper about this shit and i cant message my friend abt this rn

AVA 11

IMMEDIATE THOUGHTS

FIRST

victim *was* tortured over and over

it makes sense why he hates alan (cursors) so much

it wasnt a one and done, he suffered for 9 months and gave birth to trauma in the form of a rocket ship

the fact that it is so blatant that alan is just bored and bullying this bitch for fun like he is sat on a *laptop* fucking around with this stick he keeps calling victim and relinking he conciousness to that stick body

i loved that and also i felt smart (ik its obvious shut up)

SECOND (coming? /j this aint about him)

i immediately knew mitsi was his wife and when i tell you i got attached, i mean i sobbed at how joyous they were and in my list of scramblings (a page of notes during the premier) i called her wife several times

also mitsi is the name of my GREY stardew valley cat

speaking of grey

lets go with THIRD

i found it interesting how victim became grey, im still not sure why, maybe theres just a lack of solid black in newgrounds flash animations idk

debunking my own theory here uh yeah im lost asf like something about his intrusion to the internet world just dulled and mono-ed his colours, maybe its because of the way he entered?

SPEAKING OF

FOURTH

i initially saw newgrounds as the big world and realised it was the internet stickcity earth that the showdown happens in (makes sense)

thats all

FIFTH

rocket origin makes so much sense also like the way they (mitsi and vic) became a literal power couple is incredible and i wish they had a long happy life

...

*had*

SIXTH

i cried when mitsi died

like

god my heart is so torn alan why

AND THEN CHOSEN ROSE UP AND MY JAW DROPPED TO THE FLOORORRRRRRR

followed by tdl (my babies theyre evil and i love them)

when i say that last 5ish minutes had my jaw pinned to the floor-

anyway

i think thats all rn

i am still in shock

its 1:12am guys why do i do this

if i have any revelations ill reblog or post or something

anyway its time to pretend mitsi and victim are living happily ever after through fanart <3

oh and lastly:

⋆ ₊ ﾟmy scrambles * ₊ ⋆

[ngray192]

CHAOS THEORY SEASON TWO IS OUT!!!! As you all expected, I watched it all in one sitting and wrote notes on everything! Under the cut is my train of thought and commentary on the season, and no, you will not be given context for anything that I wrote.

- omg I’ve been waiting all dayyyyy

- Raptor lady is gone, I wonder who the new villain is.

- I wonder if this is gonna tie into Dominion at all

- Boat!!

- Shoutout to Nick “Rocket” Rodriguez

- I’m sorry did they make a hammock in here????

- Only Sammy can make a shipping container into a home

- Yaz I love you

- Yasammyyyyyyy ugh they’re adorable

- I knew it was a baryonyx!!!

- Kenjis so sad

- Why is he throwing lettuce into the ocean?

- Like five minutes in and there’s so many small yasammy moments

- Ex-kon was hilarious, you guys just don’t get it

- LET HIM COPE

- Yaz and Kenji moment!!!!

- Therapist Yaz is my favorite

- I love her development and growth omg

- Hybrid Dino??

- Kenji Kon, stop leaving the container

- A storms brewing

- Why is there just an open crate of lettuce?

- Bro you’re wasting so much lettuce

- They were in Louisiana last season?

- How tf have you not been caught?

- The water animationnnn

- Oh shit

- Ben please don’t get shocked again

- Ngl I’d offer to help too

- Yaz and Kenji in their besties era

- BUMPYS EGG

- Is that a baryonyx?

- DID IT DIE???

- Two?!

- The ashes from the fire animation is wild

- Yes saves the Dino eggs

- Oh fuck this is kinda graphic I love it

- This gives the same vibes as the actual movies and I’m all for it

- Bro that parasarolaphus (I cannot spell) looks scary af

- Sammy running to Yaz for Yasammy, Ben running to Kenji?????

- Lets see a person die

- Aaaaah it’s the scene from the clip I saw!!!!

- Such a cool chase scene

- BUMPYS EGG

- KENJI STOP

- He didn’t help you, he saved your fucking life

- Are we gonna get a “Kenji is suicidal” arc???

- Tell me why I was actually worried? They’re not gonna kill Kenji

- Brotherss

- Those eggs should be scrambled wtf

- A lot of Yaz and Kenji moments I’m here for it

- Open up, PLEASE

- Oh shitttt

- He’s not gonna tell anyone, is he?

- THE MEMORIAL IM CRYING

- Solid first episode

Episode 2

- “marooned five”

- The light shining from the clouds??? Beautiful

- Ok, this is a valid “not telling the group the truth” plot line, he doesn’t wanna distract them and be wrong

- I’m sorry, who tf are you people??

- Wait is this small child gonna join the group??

- Please don’t be a big part of the show, I wanna focus on Camp Fam

- Are the dinosaurs protecting her? I love that

- What kinda Dino is that? Gallimimus? Struithominous?

- Did they change clothes or just take off their jackets?

- Omg they can’t split into 3 groups of 2 anymore

- Yasammy side mission!!!

- I love Kenji omg

- They’re such brothers, I love it

- Same old dino nerd

- Why are you not concerned that people are on your property?

- Why would you just tell her a large portion of your plan??

- I kinda want this lady to be evil

- Can we get a name for this girl soon?

- No she found the eggs!!!

- Why tf would you take it from the bush and leave it out in the open?

- Do you need service to play a video like that?

- Also you can def show the group just the thumbnail for the video and they’ll see her

- They’re so goofy, I love them.

- I was right, it is a gallimimus!!

- It’s like a dino-mill upriver

- Damnit, you guys just fucked up the balanced ecosystem here

- Cool ass dino omg

- The colors on herrrr

- Please don’t fall out of a tree

- The rice nooooo

- It’s a suchomimus

- Stop trying to fix things omg

- I’m sorry but I don’t care about the mom and daughter

- “Off-brand alligator”

- I love how Yasammy is usually Team Distraction

- Darius is so fast wtf

- Rock climber Kenji

- MOVE KENJI

- HES SO STUPID AND BEING SO DANGEROUS

- They are kicking that Suchomimus’s ass omg

- His voice is so much deeper than in CC

- Screenshot and show the rest of the group the picture of Brooklyn omfg

- Animata and Zayna

- SHOW THEM

- SHOW THEMMMMMM

- UGH

- I hate you

- Captain Kenji!!

- Ngl this season isn’t as interesting as season 1, but hopefully it’ll get better

Episode 3

- This episode is titled “Clever Girl 86”

- Brooklyn!!!

- And freshly amputated damn

- YOU “stitched her up” AT HOME???

- Aww a compy lost its foot?

- I love when people in shows have realistic reactions

- She drove a motorcycle??

- Video call!!

- I don’t like that jacket

- Clevergirl86 is someone from Dark Jurassic, maybe Ronnie??

- Ok, so this is the day they broke up?

- I should’ve finished rewatching it he first season

- Oh is it love confession time?

- He’s such a bad liar

- No, it’s different with Ben because they’re IN love

- Girl don’t say “unless…”

- Yikes

- I love how you can see the reflections on screens, it’s so cool

- Account was hacked???

- It doesn’t look like enough of her arm is gone

- Is this a full Brooklyn episode? It’s only episode 3

- Ronnie is definitely a lesbian

- Alcohol will take the edge off, let’s get hammered

- I hate the pixie cut, I’m sorry

- Awww Gordon

- OVER 60??

- Her dads are in town for the funeral???

- This is so sad

- She still acts like Brooklyn

- Wow, never mind a lot of her arm is gone

- Kill the DPW guy

- Stab him, you’re dead you can’t be put on trial for murder

- I refuse to believe Raptor Lady speaks to people on the phone

- Ok, but staying dead was kind smart

Episode 4

- the dino liberators are here

- He’s trying to be Kenji and I don’t like it

- Why wear masks if you’re just gonna take them off and use your real names?

- A trust fund? Earnest is fr just Kenji but worse and mixed with a little bit of Dave

- Syd?

- The animation is gorgeous

- OUTFIT CHANGES???

- Her username is Esther Stone

- Nosey ass kid

- Yaz looks so cute!!!

- Do not take the child with you

- Please tell us what happened with Sammy’s family

- Nooooo don’t go with the group

- They all look like their faces and bodies changed when they changed clothes

- Ok, she’s still in America

- Are they gonna kill them???

- THEY TOOK GEBA

- Why tf is Kenji wearing those shoes?

- THEY KNOCKED HIM TF OUT

- The camera shaking as the dinos run out? I love it

- She’s a pretty good actress

- God I fucking hate this guy

- Why are the dinosaurs so sad?

- I don’t care about this child and her dinosaurs

- UHGHGHRHGGHHHHH I DONT WANT THIS CHILD HERE. IT IS A CAMP FAM SHOW

- Why is he being a dick all of a sudden?

- Dubai?

- She’s just like Ben dropping her phone in the water

Episode 5

- such a pretty show omg

- Sammy is such mom-material

- She’s 14???

- They’re back to their old outfits, sigh

- Why did they split up Darius, Sammy, Zayna and Kenji, Yaz, and Ben?

- Same old Ben

- Girl, the six of you lived together on an island for six months, privacy does NOT exist with this group

- Omg do you think it’s the girl from JW Dominion?

- “Damning”

- THE GADDY, DADDYS GADDY FROM SEASON 3

- How many close call sneaking scenes are we gonna have?

- Is it the girl from Dominion?

- Stop being weird about her missing limb??

- There’s no way Ben has cell service rn

- Not him using Yasminas head to get around the boat

- I love his little dino imitations

- This reminds me of JWCC season 1 episode 6 or 7 with the kayaks

- Ok, yeah it is the raptor girl from JW Dominion

- All around the globe?

- Oh fuck

- Come on, Sammy get the gun!

- KENJI WTF

- STOP

- The way her bangs move when she shakes her head, I love her

- Did the raptor press the elevators buttons what

- She’s kinda bad at painting

- Oh shitttt

- Is she the one hunting the kids?

- This penthouse chase scene is good

- Girl is not good at running from dinos

- The way she immediately puts the same arm up is a nice detail

- Girl you are not cut out for being on this journey with this group

- They were taking all the risks on those islands

- I’m not really getting anything marked on my bingo card

- TELL THEM

Episode 6

- what is in the water? Cause i doubt it’s the mossasaurus

- Awww a hippo

- Wait hippos are crazy dangerous

- Reminds me of the paras during the kayak episode in CC Season 1

- Zayna def should’ve known hippos are dangerous af

- “Dirtbag”

- You’re wasting all your food

- Throw the mangoes further omg

- KENJIN KON YOU ARE SO STUPID

- The details in the animationnnnnnughhgugggh

- Ben’s lips look so chapped omg

- I hate this child

- A lot of fire this season

- I don’t think she’s the Broker, I think there’s someone bigger

- Sammy needs to become a mom

- YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE CELL SERVICE HERE

- Oumars dead babe

- She’s vegetarian??

- OMG

- IS THAT A DEAD BODY????

- WTF

- They’re all so stressed out

- You’re gonna make her anxiety come back, let her breathe

- Brooklyn, wtf are you doing?

- Kill her

- Sucho number 2

- KENJI

- Don’t hide Yaz wtf

- Oh fuck that had to hurt

- THEYRE GONNA LEAVE HER BEHIND

- Lame, should’ve killed her

- They were 13 on the island?

- I guess she is the broker?

- Ok, girl nobody believes you

- Don’t give her the laser pointer

- IS HIS SHOULDER DISLOCATED

- BRO WTF

- They never would’ve shown half of this shit in JWCC

- YES NOW TURN BACK AND GET YAZ

- Oh she’s knocked tf out

Episode 7

- only a few more left

- Give her a break omg shits always happening to her

- Why is it taking so long for them to get back to her??

- … I guess the Sucho won

- I feel like the boats are much faster than going on foot?

- Also the current is not that strong

- Damn Sammy’s kinda scary when she’s worried about her wife

- Fuck this Sucho fr

- I wish we got more Ben and Darius this season, even just as friends

- Why are Kenji and Ben being so awkward??

- Darius does NOT know how to talk to children but he’s trying so hard

- Once again, the animation is gorgeous

- I love him

- I don’t like Zayna

- She’s real af for that though

- Yaz has a head injury and is climbing up trees rn, girlboss

- OH SHIT

- That lowkey scared me

- LEAVE HER ALONE

- THAT KICK OMG

- Girl is struggling

- I love a good Yaz-forward episode

- I love the way the eyes shine when the flashlights are on them

- Awww Kenji

- Benji?

- Aww Darius protecting Zayna

- “Oh jeez, oh jeez, oh jeez” I love him

- They are just beating the shit out of the local wildlife and I love it

- LIONS?!?

- This girl does not know everything omg

- Water and land are dangerous, you would’ve had problems either way

- Give her a break omfg

- IT CAN SWIM?!

- Yaz’s plot armor is absurd

- She needs to get back to her girlfriend, she is cold, wet, tired, injured

- You have paddles?? At least you should

- What dino is this?

- The dino fights are crazy this season

- You’re doing all of this in sandals??

- … at least you don’t have to worry about the Sucho anymore

- KENJI YOU RUINED THE MOMENT

- “My girl” STOPPPPP

- They’re so in love

- ITS DAYTIME???

- Probably my favorite episode so far

Episode 8

- this is 2 parter??

- I love how they all just know how to steer a boat???

- Awww Kenji protecting Yaz

- I love Sammy

- How tf can they hear a generator that far away??

- YES LEAVE HER BEHIND

- Girl

- Kenji is the older brother ever

- Oh shit a dino

- The chase scenes are good this season

- Kenji, stop IT

- Finally

- This is so sad

- Yasmina “not a hugger” Fadoula

- They’re so in sync

- Monolophasaurs?

- Benji are probably thriving rn be fr

- I love Ben

- Sammy’s so dorky I love it

- Oh my gosh

- Baby dino factory

- I hate Zayna, like I know she’s a kid but she’s annoying (I’m 17, I’m allowed to dislike children)

- Goodbye captain lang, damn

- Yasammy have not kissed ONCE this season (maybe they have, I’m not sure)

- They all take care of Zayna and that’s cute

- Yaz holding Sammy like that is adorable

- DO NOT SPLIT UP

- Why is Zayna the only person in this show with pierced ears?

- They should form a cheerleading team the way they’re lifting her

- Is this a dino fighting arena?

- IT HAS NO EYES

- This scene is actually so interesting

- FUCKING IDIOT GIRL

- Darius is the fucking king of sliding through small gaps

- Team Distraction for the win

- That is a child, why do you care if she thinks you’re cool or not??

- BRO SHOULD NOT BE ALIVE AFTER THAT FALL

- Kenjis still wearing those ugly ass shoes

- I love Ben

- WHY DID SHE JUST WALK IN THERE???

- SHE TOOK THE EGGS

- That was a good episode

Episode 9

- part 2

- That phone is huge

- Why are you having the one-armed girl drive?

- You shouldn’t trust her

- Dr. Sarr?

- Rewrite the genetic code??

- They’re still referred to as kids and I love it

- I do like episodes where I get to piece together a timeline

- What is this fucking music in the background?

- Oh shit she was working the crate and shit

- Seeing this all from her pov is kinda boring

- I was lowkey hoping for a more dramatic reveal

- I actually like how dark this season is and how every bad guy character is bad

- Oh my gosh

- Damnit Brooklyn you should’ve let her fall

- I don’t really like that we keep repeating the same scenes, but only slightly different

- It’s fine to split the Fam up like this, but we need to stop focusing on Brooklyn, I wanna go back to Ben and Kenji or Yasammy and Darius, split it up like we did in CC

Episode 10

- here we go, final episode

- Kenji needed that

- He def needed to release that anger

- I think we need to let Kenji kill someone

- Wtf how is he still alive?

- Baryonyxes are so cool

- Awww the dinosaurs are bonding

- It’s like the scene with the raptors and the hybrid in Jurassic Park 2 or 3

- I’m too invested to write notes lmao

- Those night vision sunglasses are kinda cool

- Fuck that kinda scared me

- Where is Zaynas dad?

- This season is lowkey scary

- How does her phone still have power? It’s been like 4 days

- Someone should’ve brought a gun

- They cannot hear you saying “I’m coming” in a normal volume be fr

- Ben and Kenji have been alone together way too much to not kiss

- Oh, there’s Zaynas dad

- WHERE ARE KENJI AND BEN

- Where did that car come from??

- Bro all of a sudden went into Tokyo Drift mode

- Kentrosaurus?

- Who let Kenji drive??

- There’s still so much to wrap up

- Biosyn??

- Wait does this take place before Dominion then?

- Ok, but BUMPYS EGG IS STILL IN THERE

- She def took bumpys egg out

- See? I know everything

- Oh, wait that’s it??

- I have mixed feelings.

[velvees-archive]

save for the dual destinies dlc case, i’ve finished my first play through of the mainline ace attorney games. incredibly solid series. i have a draft with my thoughts on each case in the aj trilogy + game ratings. dunno if i’d wanna post it though, it’s kinda long.

so instead, i’ll post some misc thoughts about phoenix and edgeworth portrayals across mainline/aai + my personal favorite interpretations of them by the writing team!

spoilers for AA mainline and AAI duology

by far, my favorite phoenix portrayal is og trilogy phoenix. the way he interacts with his environment and the people around him is very authentic, albeit rude as hell (which, in hindsight, is even more authentic for phoenix, so…). saw someone’s tumblr post mention that phoenix is such a “straight guy” which…yeah LMAO. real to life accuracy, so much so it’s infuriating. i think what i’ve played of dd’s dlc case captures what i wanted to see from post-trilogy phoenix in that he’s still an asshole and comically stupid, but not actually stupid, if ykwim. something i disliked abt the rest of aa5 and aa6 is how the writing team watered his character down to the following two oversimplifications: “phoenix only wins cases bc he bluffs!” and “uhh...what evidence does phoenix present now?”

don’t mistake a silly man for a stupid man. mia calls phoenix a genius in the og trilogy. phoenix dives in head first but he’s meticulous when it comes to drawing out the truth. most of all, he doesn’t outwardly show how frazzled he is (see that one drew misham quote about phoenix quietly watching the court as he’s accused of forging evidence), even if he feels that way. i get the colorful usage of expressions is for comedic effect but it just makes him look like he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing, and that’s a disservice to his character. yes, he bluffs, but he isn’t clueless. anyway, i’m excited to replay the first trilogy now that i “know” second trilogy phoenix. that might also just be my way of saying “give me back MY phoenix”, bc the last time i’m (mostly) on board w his portrayal is in aa4, and even then i didn’t like the dialogue in his forged evidence trial.

*though, as of writing this, i’ve seen some good arguments abt his forged evidence trial dialogue that make me think ok maybe it was actually pretty accurate. let’s see wht i think on replay

on the other hand, my favorite edgeworth—at least in principle—is post-apollo justice edgeworth. in many ways, i think how he’s portrayed at 35 is how he would’ve been had dl-6 not occurred, barring his career choice. still a bit pompous, still fairly mean (at least on the surface, we all know he cares more than he lets on) and perhaps a bit uptight, but self-assured and just. the writing team makes a point to show that edgeworth doesn’t care about prestige or fancy titles. that feels like him in a way post-first trilogy edgeworth doesn’t. this particular point was fleshed out in aa1 and rfta, tho, so idk if i can give yamazaki credit for it.

there are some things that will always bother me abt post-first trilogy edgeworth (the problems are present in the aai duology as well) where the writing team shoves him into a box teeming with boring tropes for his character archetype.

an example:

creds for both these pictures: me

edgeworth is fine w pictures in the first trilogy, but comes to hate them in the aai duology.

ik it’s small but honestly what was the reason? what justification is there for this outside of wanting to fit edgeworth into a “cold character” stereotype?

bridge to the turnabout and turnabout ablaze are only about a month apart. i’m not buying into the sudden aversion to picture taking, regardless how minute a criticism it is. in any case, i feel like what i’m trying to say comes through w these screenshots: yamazaki’s edgeworth is always just a little off.

i am forgetting where i saw the post and i have too many liked posts to scroll thru to find it again but i saw a reblog?? tumblr post?? abt yamazaki and takumi’s diff approaches to edgeworth, where takumi says edgeworth listens to trot while yamazaki thinks he’d listen to classical music, and if that doesn’t drive the point home, idk wht will.

why then, did i enjoy post-aj edgeworth most? short answer is i’m taking liberties w his development and its implications. while i never completely buy into post-aa3 edgeworth, i can digest and get behind most of him when i’m not nitpicking, unlike w post-aj phoenix. does edgeworth feel a little uninspired and one- as opposed to three-dimensional? yeah, but his core is so strong i can overlook it. i’ll miss seeing a developed edgeworth when replaying the trilogy. him at 35 makes me feel warm inside.

anyway, i didn’t intend to start hating when i made this post bc i ultimately still believe the second trilogy was pretty good, if not overly ambitious with it's storytelling. maybe i'll post that AJ trilogy review.

overall, tho, t&t and aai2 were my favorite games to come out of the franchise. i’m going to do that slow replay of the first trilogy, aai duology, and aj:aa before making final judgments.

[alitgblog]

s11 vol 11 thoughts and I have two screenshots to sum up the season:

finally got to throw out the one li you weren't into. I felt it was so bitter and dramatic for him to leave and not try and pretend to make it work with Sonya though but I think that's the pacing fault more than anything like final recoupling should've been last volume and then we get a dumping this episode where they leave. and if I had it my way Anna and Zac would be leaving during this dumping too.

cringe for callum absolutely embarrassing for Sonya yikes

but a solid enough final four which I only want to point out bc when is the last time we got four couples that don't feel like they'll break up the minute they leave the villa (a couple weeks if anything but maybe I just want to believe in these couples and they'll go for a few months lol).

final dates are fine. nothing special to add except that I can't believe I called yacht as the final date location lol.

I mean it did look like a pirate ship though which makes me wonder if they had this asset made for like a scrapped story on their match game app and just used it here thinking no one was gonna notice, or if the final date was supposed to be on a pirate ship (which, why??) and they changed the writing afterwards, like how in S10 Yash and Caleb have different jobs in the character menu than what they introduced themselves in the story.

I still am a fan of the Ruby Reid story like idk her being reluctant to form a relationship in general and him being a pathetic desperate romantic works even if their thing is just a summer fling. and the proposal fits into that like I saw some people have it happen between Kenzo and Maisie which I think is cringe and this is too but it also kinda fits with how absurd Reid is?

anyway rooting for them

declarations of love were fine

I remain their number one hater though they were toned down this episode

this is also why I took so long to finish the last two seasons finales bc I just know what's going to happen it's rarely interesting

Dominic has this awful bow tie I can't believe they artists did him dirty like this..I liked everyone elses finale outfits though

upset no after party where I get to see Anna again after they left so abruptly

Jin is back and he was not rooting for dominic lmaooo but I'm glad my S8 MC knows what's up

do any of yall know that episode in how I met your mother where they say right before you end a relationship you start seeing it through rose colored glasses and only remembering the good parts because that's how I felt when they recapped the dominic storyline like last week I said I was sick of it and this week I'm like this is the closest I'm getting to my love island pride and prejudice adaptation idea so I guess I liked the season for that

fuck the sleepovers though thank god those ended after casa

at some point I'd love to analyze the difference between a season like this where we end up with 2-3 options at the end and forced storylines versus having like 7 options in S8

anyway and maybe I have recency bias but not the worst season? S5 absolutely still the worst but also I'd at least call this season more memorable than S10 which was just back to back characters that don't like you. but I'll concede and give it third worst sure.

[randomprose]

dream valentine's day

[another drabble for the satosho discord server valentine day prompt: soft touches] also posted on ao3

Tragedy strikes when Satoru sends the wrong screenshot to the wrong person.

“Hey, Gojo. Quick question,” Shoko asks as she enters the staff room, staring down at her phone. “This list you sent me.”

“List?” Satoru’s head snaps up from scrolling through his own phone, like a dog who’s just seen a cat or a squirrel pass by. “What list?”

There’s panic in his eyes as his brain runs a mile a minute, helpfully reminding him about a list that he was supposed to send to Nanami and may or may not have sent to someone else instead. His fears are confirmed when Shoko turns her phone to him and Satoru sees the aforementioned list staring back at him.

“...That wasn’t supposed to be sent to you.”

“Oh? Who were you going to send this…” Shoko turns her phone back to her line of sight and reads the words, “... ’dream valentine’s day ’ list?”

“...Nanami.”

“You were gonna send this ‘dream valentine’s day’ list to Nanami,” Shoko deadpans but Satoru could see the mirth in her eyes. She’s laughing at him. “You should’ve told me you already have plans with him. And to think I even switched shifts so I can clock out early.”

“Oh, shut up. You know those plans are with you,” Satoru says, throwing one of the cushions at her which a snickering Shoko deftly caught before sitting beside him. “I was just asking for his input.”

“Why? I think it’s a pretty solid list already.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhmm,” Shoko hums, lifting her legs to rest on his lap. “I mean, the first on the agenda alone. ‘Make out for approximately seven hours'? Romantic.”

“That’s me. Mr. Romance.” Satoru shrugs, deciding to just ride along Shoko’s teasing as he does.

“Second on the agenda, ‘something with flowers or plants or art’. I get the flowers or plants part, but what’s with the art thing?”

“Thought we’d try something different this year. Bring in a little culture in the mix.”

“Oh? What do you have in mind?” At the face Satoru makes at her, Shoko just grins and needles at him. “C’mon. Secret’s out anyway. Tell me already so I can look forward to it more.”

“It was supposed to be a surprise,” Satoru mutters, pouting.

“Yeah, well, you already messed that one up when you wrong sent to me, buddy.” She pats his arm consolingly and keeps it there. “C’mon. I’m pretty easy to please. I’ll probably still be surprised. I promise.”

Satoru sighs, easily giving in to her as he always does. God. The power this woman holds over him. If she ever realizes she’s got him wrapped around her pinky, the world as they know it is doomed—not like she isn’t aware of it anyway, sharp as she is.

“The Van Gogh Alive exhibit.”

“The one in Shinagawa? I’ve always wanted to go.”

“I know,” he says, reaching over to tuck an errant lock of hair behind her ear before his hand decided to rest on her nape. “Got us tickets the day you mentioned it.”

“Mmm,” Shoko hums, pleased and trying in vain to hide the smile threatening to break out by pressing her lips together. “And then dinner.”

“Yeah, ‘cause we’ll be hungry after all that walking and art appreciating.”

“Not to mention the approximately seven hours of making out prior to that. Smart.”

“I do have my moments.”

“Tiramisu for dessert?”

Satoru shrugs. “I like sweets and you don’t. Gotta find a middle ground, you know? Made a reservation at that French patisserie we said we’d try ages ago.”

“A good a time as any, huh?” Shoko looks back at her phone and reads the last item on the list. “‘Hand stuff’? What, like holding hands—”

“Yes, naturally. Obviously. Definitely a total must!”

“—or… hand stuff ?” Shoko finishes with a suggestive look.

“Or…?” Satoru narrows his eyes at her as if in confusion before realization hits him at Shoko’s look. “Oh. Oh! I actually really only meant the first one, but yes! I am also definitely not opposed to the other hand stuff part.”

“Sounds like a solid dream valentine’s day then.”

“Pick you up at five?”

“Took half of the day off. If you don’t have anything else on your plate today you can pick me up after lunch break,” Shoko says standing up from her perch next to him and starting for the door, already knowing the rest of his day is free. “Gotta get a start on the approximately seven hours of making out if we want to make it to the rest of our reservations after all.”

Shoko exits with a smirk and a wink over her shoulder, leaving Satoru blushing to the tips of his ears and practically vibrating in anticipation.

[imperator-kahlo]

TLOU 2x04 - "Day One" - First Watch

This is going to be a short one! I finished this episode with a nice satisfied feeling. No big structural changes from the game that I need to unpack a bit for myself, no obviously loose thematic threads to tug on. I'm half inclined to not write anything at all, but I like to get down my own thoughts before I start seeing everybody else's.

Ellie and Dina

For my money, this was well worth the wait. This moment, when Ellie reveals her immunity, was always going to play differently in the show, because without spores, there's no way for Ellie to immediately prove to Dina that she's not infected. And we know that, when dealing with infected, the possibility of shooting your friend in the face is top of mind for everyone in Jackson.

So they both make these big expressions of love and trust in one another: Ellie saves Dina's life without hesitation, even though it means revealing this big, dangerous secret. Dina trusts Ellie enough to do the stupid thing, the thing you never, ever do: wait and see if the infection will take.

And then Dina, awake all night, wrecked with stress, grief, panic, and the potential loss of this future she'd hardly given herself permission to hope for, is finally able to just be honest with herself and Ellie. I love it. I love everything about it. I'm going to be really controversial and say that I like it better than the library scene.

Isaac, Wolves, Seraphites

I like what they're doing here. I don't want to draw any real conclusions until we've seen more, but my sense is that the writers are at least trying to correct some of the more problematic elements of the game.

In the game, we meet the Seraphites last, and the only sympathetic members of that faction are fleeing its persecution. The Scars aren't humanised to remotely the same extent that the Wolves are, and there are troubling parallels drawn to Palestinian resistance movements. In the show, we meet the Seraphites in 2x03, before we meet the main force of the Wolves. They're framed sympathetically, as refugees fleeing war, gunned down by the WLF—who we're already primed to hate because of Abby's actions. The next Seraphite we meet is a torture victim.

So when we come across the mutilated bodies at the news station, we have some context for it. It's harder to immediately assume that they're just a bloodthirsty, zealous cult. I think they're going to add a bit of much-needed nuance to the war in Seattle, and I appreciate that.

(I think some of the problematic politics of TLOU, and probably especially the liberal Zionism, are sort of baked in, and there's only so much they can do to fix it. At some point I'll type up my long rant about why I hate the whole "cycles of violence" thing, or at least how I've heard Druckmann talk about it, but not today.)

As for Isaac: I mentioned in my post about 2x03 that I was interested to see how they reconciled Isaac's code, or at least Abby's understanding of it, with Isaac's little torture camp. Based on this episode, I think the point is going to be that Isaac's code applies only to people, and he doesn't see Scars as people.

Heavy sigh. This feels a smidge heavy handed and simplistic to me, but I'm willing to see what happens. Jeffrey Wright is incredibly compelling, as was the peek at his back story in the cold open, so I'm along for the ride.

Misc

I find the subway sequence in the game to be genuinely quite harrowing, and I thought they did a great job of reproducing that feeling in a very tight few minutes screen time.

Kind of a shame to not get to see Dina's badassery at Eastbrook Elementary, but I think they've done a very good job of showing both that Dina's incredibly competent and that Dina and Ellie fight very well as a unit.

Overall, very solid episode imo.

"Going to be a short one," indeed. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Edit: added two screenshots from 2x04

[valenshawke]

Ramblings… or Word Vomit, whichever.

I think it’s been since January that I’ve been on Tumblr regularly. Unlike the July 2020 start to my extended break, this isn’t quite due to health issues and I’m actively trying to post a bit here and there since I do need to scream into the void. I’ve blamed my job a lot given whom my employer is. This isn’t to say it isn’t deserved, it 100% is. But it’s not the full picture.

And I haven’t really talked about the reasons with people. I actually just finally started speaking about one of the big reasons with my therapist today and I guess we will explore more going forward. But it was a couple of days ago that I realized how Arcane season 2 played out in November and into December had a deep negative effect on my desire to engage (how little I do) with fandom. Any fandom really.

I can quantify how important Arcane is to me. It’s easy, just look at my blog. I started this blog because of Claymore and wanting to find fans of it. And up until the fall of 2024, the single most used fandom tag on my blog was #Claymore. For 10 solid years, the only thing that came close was Fullmetal Alchemist/Brotherhood and even that was a couple of thousand posts behind.

Then I watched Arcane. And in about 2 years, that show did what nothing else could do: It became my most used fandom tag. And the hype machine for season two meant disappointment was greater than pure satisfaction. What we got? To me, a good yet deeply flawed ending. By all reason, I should have been ecstatic. The two characters I shipped were both alive by the end and were unequivocally together. My ship sailed. I should have been over the moon.

But I had some real problems with the sociopolitical themes and solutions. But no media is perfect and under this capitalist society, a piece of media advocating for a revolution was never going to be made under these conditions.

And that was okay.

Critical analysis is okay. And to be critical of something does not mean you hate it. It means you’ve put more thought into it than most people have. I love the Dune Chronicles, but I can sit here and tell you the problems of Frank Herbert’s storytelling, some of his ideology, and the entirety of book 4 (AND I REALLY ENJOYED BOOK 4). Anyone that knows me will not doubt my love and reverence of the original canon. But it’s far from perfect and critique is necessary and blindly following something is dangerous… As Frank Herbert pointed out repeatedly.

But the vociferous reaction by parts of the fandom made this an either/or proposition. You either loved it and thought it the greatest thing since the Epic of Gilgamesh or you thought it was complete trash/unapologetic waste. Does this represent the majority of the fandom? Absolutely not. But it did describe, what I felt, the loudest parts of the fandom. Interesting how fandom behaviors can be reflections of society, eh? Almost like a microcosm.

And that really dampened how I felt about interacting with fandom again. But, if things had a modicum of normality anywhere, I’d get over, things would calm down, and we’d move on. Enter the transition to the current political regime (which has a direct impact on my job) and it makes wanting to engage with fandom even harder. But I would try.

Then Christian Linke opened his fucking mouth. I have a folder in my computer named, “Christian Linke Being a Fucking Dumbass.” It’s just screenshots I took of the stupid shit he was saying on Xitter (since I wanted to show some other people). He is the first creator since Christ fucking Carter to incur such hatred and contempt from me. CHRIS CARTER. THE TROPE MAKER OF “TROLL CREATORS.” Several of the things Linke said left a deep and negative impact on how I felt about the series. And I have to say, that really sucks. Because this show fucking consumed me in a way I didn’t expect. All I knew it as was an animated show based on a video game I played all of two minutes for sometime in 2011.

I know I’ll be back to fandom activities and I’ll be back to reblogging normally. And getting the fandom blog I do actually run up to speed. But it’s just hard between work and the disappointment I still feel about how everything played out when Arcane finished.

But that isn’t the only reason I needed to vomit words today. It was also the harsh reminder that friendships can (and often are) fleeting even if they last a long time. One friendship, I bitched and moaned a lot about from about 2015 to 2023 still hurts on the way it just ended with an immediate thud still bothers me. No growing apart, no drifting. Just saying something at the wrong time (I was watching Soul Eater so subjecting said friend to running commentary) and it was over the next second. The other, I don’t think I’ve ever spoken about at length here. I’m not sure I can even call it a friendship. The time spent actually talking to each other was was maybe less than a year cumulatively. But when we did have to talk, it was… heavy. And I tried to be a supportive friend. And I think I was. But then, the other person drifted away. And I made a few attempts to try to at least keep in contact. My hunch is that I am part of that period of life this person would rather forget and that’s understandable. But I am just… hurt… I guess that my only purpose was to be a therapist (which is fucking laughable). And I got that reminder today on how much that former friend has moved on. I like to think I have but when you have all these negative emotions and an alienated feeling towards your current friends… old memories get dredged up.

And now I am faced with the fleeting and ephemeral nature of friendship again. And the ending of that friendship is nearer, it has definable features now. Maybe even a timetable if I think really hard enough. To be honest, I’m not even sure the other person is aware that the clock is now ticking. And it’s pretty likely that it’ll end when one day of no messaging leads to two, then three, then a month has passed. But alas, I know this is my fault because of whom I choose as friends. Maybe my parents weren’t all wrong when they had their opinions on the nature of friendships and relationships.

And I have another friend who is dying. As much I try not to think about it, I am always left with the phone call in mid-February when I asked, “Well, when are you going home.”

“I’m not going back home, [Val].”

Nothing else needed to be said. Cause I really did not want to hear her say what I knew. I’m always left wondering why she put any value into my life when I wouldn’t (or couldn’t cause of the whole undiagnosed clinical depression thing). But it’s enough to say, I wouldn’t be alive with her. So, there’s that. And knowing the end is near for her is just… a lot.

It isn’t all bad, though. What little focus I have these days goes into my “Homelab.” Which is what people call a home server. I have projects! Right now, I’m trying to setup a selfhosted Google Drive replacement as part of my whole de-Big Teching thing. Moving away from Google (stopped using Gmail entirely, stopped using Google search except as a last resort, trying to find a decent Workspace solution, stopped using Chromium-based browsers a few years ago), Microsoft (we are powered by Linux now babey), nVidia (yeah, joined #Team Red… again… kinda). It’s been fun and frustrating. The frustration goes back to my lack of mental stamina that I had in 2023 since 2024 was a waste (cause I was wasted through a third of it). Took me three weeks to realize why something wasn’t working.

So, that’s where life’s been with me.

Anyways, if you’re reading this: I hope you’re doing well. Or surviving at the very least. We have to survive this current moment in time. If for no other reason, than out of pure spite.

[batsplat]

Paging an expert because im a noob but am i making things up in my head or has dasha k’s serve been kind of lowkey quite good recently because at least to me it seemed to be working better than in the past matches ive watched of her i think(?). lack of tennis twitter usage means idk any super specific comparison stats so this thought is mostly supported by vibes and also on my highly uninformed eyeballs that were watching the recent matches and also onscreen match stats which ik can be misleading but i am still easily swayed by.

(Also by recently i mean like the last 2 ao rounds vs like 2024 ao because that’s all ive watched so far <- has still yet to watch more than like 4 matches b/w ao 2024 and ao 2025, so maybe she already made the serving improvement last season and im late to the party lol)

okay i'm gonna be honest, i've been completely negligent in my duties as a fan here because i've watched like. five minutes of dasha play this tournament

can't remember when she was playing first round but DO remember second round where she was FIRST ON and like... i swear slams do this really annoying thing where they just put on fifty million fun women's matches first thing in the day almost as if to get rid of them. and then at some point in the day you turn around and it's only. Men. playing for like HOURS at a time and i don't want to watch that shitttt. and dasha was clashing BOTH with jabeur/osorio and anisimova/raducanu, and unfortunately it just slipped down my priority list and i literally blinked and she was done. which, i mean good on her but also horrid scheduling. and then third round i think i watched a few points but i was basically just asleep

so i do feel like to some extent i have to put a pin in this ask and only return to it once i've properly had the chance to see dasha in action. she's the underdog in tomorrow's match and i'm gonna try really hard to wake up for it. i think with serving in particular i do need to SEE it, like unfortunately i've spent a lot of my life analysing serves for coaching purposes (serving is extremely not my favourite part of the game so i don't really ENJOY squinting at slow-mo's but like,, u gotta do it) so i do feel like i'm quite solid at assessing them quickly... but you do need a match. i watched the extended highlights of the putintseva match --

-- and idt she's done anything major with her technique per se. i'm just gonna give a quick rundown of some of a couple of the main technical issues with her serve, going to try to keep it as simple + accessible as possible but am happy to give clarification, before getting to the actual stats and the bits that ARE vaguely promising

to my eyes, the main limiting factor of that technique remains the preparatory phase, aka everything that happens until the player moves out of the trophy position (that moment when they pause before they explode upwards - basically as 'low' as the player goes). i've put dasha's trophy position side-by-side with my go-to women's player for 'look you can be short and a fantastic server', the dearly departed (retired) ash barty

there's some quite obvious differences here. ash actually had quite an extreme angle at which she leaned backwards so let's ignore that part - the main two things you can focus on here are a) the bend of the knees, and b) the angle of the right arm. to put it simply, dasha's movement isn't explosive enough. there's not enough tension there... it's like if you press down a spring - the further down you press, the greater the effect when you let go. the right arm angle is particularly egregious though, to be clear, it is an absolute nightmare to tinker with in any way that is sustainable. it means that when dasha starts her actual racquet motion, there's just a little bit... missing, in terms of how much weight she's managing to put on that ball

there's also an issue with how that explosive upwards movement is timed. this one's quite hard to capture in screenshots, but basically when you're serving... it's tough because a lot of different body parts are doing a lot of quite complicated things at once. you're moving your racquet, you're opening your chest, you're exploding upwards with your legs. with barty, you've got this real dynamism where the body is basically already taut at the point where she's leaving the ground, and she then twists to hit the ball

compare and contrast with how dasha looks when she's about to leave the ground. the legs are still kinda bent, the body isn't really leaning backwards, there's just this visible lack of tension in the body, there's just far less upwards explosion

i mean idk if u can see because it's like three pixels but y'know

so yeah, obviously not a major overhaul over the off-season. i do GET that serves are very tricky to work with and also like,,, quite sensitive, where if you fuck it you might REALLy fuck it and suddenly you just cannot get a serve in anymore. the thing about barty as a server is that... because she's so short (1,66 to 1,7 for kasatkina), she's this great example of EVERY body part working together perfectly to create this unitary dynamic movement. like when rybs serves up aces, it's a bit more whatever because... if i were as tall as a tree, i too could simply whack a ball downwards. that's why barty kinda the modern benchmark to me for how you can completely maximise what you have at your disposal (though obviously barty was operating with unfair amounts of natural talent, which can't hurt)

anyway, that's the micro level technique analysis. let's check out the macro level and see what her stats have been like. i've pulled these basic stats from tennis abstract (best tennis website on the internet) for convenience sake:

now to some extent, it's tough to read TOO much into these numbers. like, yes, dasha won a lot of service points - but she also won a lot of points in general. she won the matches! she's playing well! because the serve tends to be such a neutral points starter for dasha, it can be quite tricky to interpret whether an increase in service points won tells you much about her serving quality. i would say that, more than anything else, her *second serve* points won jump out at me. this is an area where dasha traditionally really struggles because her second serve is, to put it politely, truly abysmal - so 75% of second serve points won in her second round match is really really good. i scrolled back and the last time she won more than 75% second serve points was in may 2023, where she won a staggering 100% of her second serve points against stearns lol (but it can't have hurt that her first serve % was.... 96.6%...? good job). as you can see, she experienced a bit of a drop against putintseva - as you'd expect given the increased quality of opponent - but 55% for her standards is still broadly quite good. and looking at that h2h specifically, you can see poots does have the ability to do more damage on the second serve than she did in this latest match:

the other thing we can do is check her return stats, to try to again tease apart how much difference the serve is actually making:

now I'd have to actually do some maths on this which I am... not going to do, but just eyeballing these numbers... idt there's as noticeably a positive aberration for the return numbers as with the second service numbers. if you look at the matches she's won (she suffers a lot of blow-outs when she loses, leading to a real collapse in numbers), i'd say her first serve returning against poots was clearly very good but otherwise it's all broadly what you'd expect. dasha is an excellent returner and an awful server, so in general it's quite a good sign when her serving numbers are markedly better than her return numbers. after r2 i would have also given a shout out to her lack of double faults, but then she did post a 12.7% double fault stat in her poots match lol. dasha can get quite egregious with that stat because she knows how much pressure her second serve is under

we do also have tennis abstract's very handy stats leaderboard to work with to give a bit more big picture context for these stats. in the last 52 weeks, on average dasha won 60% of her first serve points and 43% of her second, making her the fourth worst player in the latter stat in the top fifty (arguably better than you'd expect lol). she has won 41% of her first serve return points and 57.7% of her second. so while in these matches she has been beating her average numbers across the board, as you'd expect in three fairly comfortable wins, the biggest aberration is in second serve points won

in conclusion. i think you're onto something, in that she's been doing a good job at protecting her second serve!! but ALSO, not to end on a downer note, i would always advise caution. dasha is a very good match player and has managed her first few opponents well.... but because of her unbalanced serve/return prowess, she's susceptible to both winning matches very clearly and losing them very clearly. now we're getting to the bit of the draw where you're probably going to see the latter. navarro is like... i mean honestly, dasha COULD beat her, that's a winnable match. they've not actually played before, so no clue what that match-up looks like. navarro seems to be quite an accomplished first serve returner, but in positive news for dasha she clocks in as merely average at second serve returning. though you don't need to be a GREAT returner to do a lot with dasha's second serve. honestly i don't really watch navarro much, she's by far the top ten player i've seen the least of by like... several orders of magnitude, so we'll see lol. in any case, even if dasha gets past that she does obviously run into one iga swiatek, where the journey will very much end. iga is in that category of players who can just swat away dasha's second serve like it's nothing, and in a way ANY improvement at protecting that thing better would be highly welcome. we'll see!! it's been a good run for her, best she's had at a slam since 2023. poots was a good win. hopefully she can keep it going one more round