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braveclementine · 3 months

Text

September

Warnings: None

Copyright: I do not own any Twilight characters or locations. I do own Davina Mikelson and Marcel. I also own the backstory for my OC. I do not condone any copying of this.

Davina P.O.V.

I rushed into the hospital, specifically Carlisle Cullen's office. "So sorry I'm late Doctor." I said, dashing to the file cabinet so that I could grab the work I was supposed to be doing. "I had a timed test for one of my classes and I only just got it done."

Carlisle laughed, "It's not a problem Davina. You're only five minutes late."

"Five minutes and it's my first day." I pointed out, breathing hard as I sat down gently on the couch, trying not to flop down.

I had graduated from Forks High School last May and had applied to some online courses so that I didn't have to go in person to college. Carlisle thought it was him that was keeping me from having 'real life college experience', but it wasn't. I just didn't feel like leaving the small town that was like a whole world of its' own.

I had also started being a bit more than an intern at the hospital, but as I still wasn't a full fledged doctor, I was still considered an intern. But now, I was allowed to work with real patients- if it wasn't serious- and also learn more about medicines.

Not to mention I was also the mother of vampires and werewolves.

Yes, vampires and werewolves. None of them were actually my biological children- vampires being created by venom and werewolves having real parents- but regardless, I was the mother of both groups.

On the vampire side, it made sense. Carlisle was like the father of Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Edward and his sister Esme was like their Aunt. So, as I was dating Carlisle, it sort've made me the mother.

With the werewolves on the other hand- there were only three: Jared, Paul, and Sam. Sam was my brother and he was also the leader of the werewolf pack. But somehow, I had become a mother figure to Jared and Paul. They always came to me about problems- Paul had a lot of them- and so there was that.

Not that I minded. I really liked my position in the vampire and werewolf tribes, even if they weren't very traditionally. Dating a vampire. Being a werewolf's sister. . . even if we weren't related.

"How did the test go?" Carlisle asked, looking up from his work. Merlin he was so hot in his white coat and light blue shirt.

"Uh a 95.6%." I said with a slight frown, "They didn't tell me what I got wrong though so that was a little annoying."

"That's a good grade." Carlisle said. "Good job."

I tried not to beam with pride.

"Oh yeah, were you able to get Bella's birthday present?" I asked after a few minutes. I had forgotten what had been nagging me and this was it.

"Yes I did." Carlisle said with a smile.

"How much were the tickets?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Don't worry about it." Carlisle said.

I tsked, "Carlisle, it's not a present from both of us if I didn't help pay for it."

"Yes it is." Carlisle argued. "Besides, I don't mind."

I hesitated but didn't really feel like arguing if he truly was fine with taking the bulk of the payment for the airplane tickets. Plus, Alice gave me a $5000 dress as a gift so I supposed $828 dollar plane tickets was pocket change.

Alice also never let anyone wear anything twice in her family. So, I would take the mens' clothes, wash them several times before putting them in boxes in the attic. I planned to give them to Sam after a few months so that one, the vampire smell would be out of them after some time and two, Sam would be able to give them to any of the boys who started having no clothing due to wolfing out so much.

For Alice, Rosalie, and Esme's clothes- I kept the ones I liked and fit. The others I made money off of at the thrift store. The really pricey ones I sold on Amazon.

I finished my work quickly, filing it away before kissing Carlisle good-bye and headed back to the Cullen house.

Once home, I headed up to Carlisle and mine bedroom- well really more mine as Carlisle didn't sleep- and looked for something to wear tonight for Bella's birthday.

I wore a white, thin sleeved shirt with a pleated plaid skirt. I wore a cream coloured sweater over that along with similar coloured shoes with dark brown laces. I did my own makeup today, doing a light covering before curling my dark brown hair into the curls that Carlisle loved so much.

[Ignore basically anything that wasn't in above description]

It was late, Alice was decorating downstairs. Carlisle had come in at some point, leaning against the doorframe to watch me curl my hair. I ignored him so I didn't burn myself and only turned to acknowledge his presence once I'd unplugged the curling iron.

"Hey love." Carlisle said, holding out his arms and I eagerly walked forward into his embrace.

"Hey Ravenclaw." I grinned. I had made all of the Cullens take Pottermore tests and Carlisle- as expected- was a Ravenclaw. It was now my nickname for him.

"Alice is going slightly overboard." Carlisle said with a sigh. "I'm afraid Bella might have a stroke."

"Well, good thing there is a doctor at home." I said, standing up on my tip toes to press my lips to his. "I'll be downstairs in a moment, okay?"

"Yes." Carlisle said and he was gone without even the slightest ruffle of a breeze.

I grinned at myself in the mirror, wiping away some excess blush and then headed out of the bedroom.

I heard voices and I headed over to one of the other rooms where Edward and Bella were standing, gazing at one of the pictures I hadn't had a chance to look at yet.

". . .thing to royalty my world has." Edward was saying.

Bella looked at the picture and then asked with slight hesitation, "Is that Carlisle?"

I moved so that I could see the painting. It was rather large, taking up room almost floor to ceiling, though not wide.

It depicted a scene of three vampires looking out over a balcony, one leaning against a pillar standing a respectful distance back: two blonds, two black.

While the three wearing more extravagant clothes looked rather proper, tall, and proud, the one in the back looked uncomfortable and small, looking pained about the humans dying beneath him.

I knew the one in the front was Aro. The leader of sorts while the one standing to the back and left of him was Marcus, his hair longer and curlier. The blond was Caius and to me, he looked a bit like Lucius Malfoy, just with red eyes and not nearly as handsome.

And of course, the vampire leaning against the pillar was Carlisle. The love of my life. He wasn't wearing extravagant clothes, but he still looked more handsome than the others. His coat was brown, the white cravat around his neck, the shirt underneath a dull yellow that matched his pants. And of course, because of the time period this was painted, they had the knee high socks and black pilgrim shoes as I called them.

"Yeah. He lived with them for a few decades." Edward answered. "Described 'em as very refined. No respect for human life, of course. But a respect for the arts and the sciences, at least. And the law. Above all, the law."

"Vampires have laws?" Bella asked.

I continued to gaze at Carlisle's figure, almost as though it was moving, his head turning from the crowd below.

"Not very many." Edward replied. "And only one that's regularly enforced."

"What is it?" Bella asked.

"That we keep the existence of our kind a secret." Edward responded. "We don't make spectacles of ourselves. And we don't kill conspicuously. Unless of course, you want to die."

"You got to stop talking about that," Bella said, and I took that as my cue to leave.

I quickly hurried through the hallway, vaulting off the stairs. "Em Bear!"

Emmett was there in millisecond, catching me before I could crash on the floor. "You gotta keep doing that Mama bear. You're going to give Carlisle a heart attack."

"Don't you mean stop doing it?" I questioned with a laugh as Emmett set me down on the floor.

"Nope because I would love to see if vampires actually can get heart attacks." Emmett teased.

Emmett was wearing a gray shirt with a tight black vest over it and black dress pants. I looked him up and down and said, "I approve. Did Ali force you to dress that way or Rose?"

"Neither. I know how to dress myself for special occasions." Emmett protested.

I raised a skeptical eyebrow as Carlisle zoomed behind me, putting his arms around my waist.

"Alright, maybe Alice pushed me in the right direction." Emmett complained.

"Mmmm." Was all I said as Carlisle rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Please don't launch yourself from high places." Carlisle muttered in my ear.

"Aww." I said, turning around to press my forehead to his. "Don't worry Carlisle. I would've landed on my feet."

I felt a growl start up in Carlisle's chest and I pressed my lips to his quickly before pulling away.

Esme, Rose, Ali, and Jaz walked into the room at that moment.

Rosalie was wearing a simple black dress and a gold necklace, walking over rather dejectedly to stand beside Emmett who looked ecstatic to see her. I smiled. Alice meanwhile darted up the stairs to get Bella. Jasper stood by himself and Esme gradually came over to stand with me and her brother.

"You look beautiful Esme." I said, taking in her red hair and purple dress.

As everyone else was wearing dresses, I felt sort of out of place wearing the rather normal skirt and shirt. Oh well.

"So do you." Esme said, giving me a hug.

Alice led Bella down the stairs, Bella stopping at the top when she saw the living room.

It was a bit much in my opinion and I was so sincerely glad that I had never told Alice when my birthday was. Carlisle and I had gone out on a secret date instead.

There were candles on every desk along with these large bouquets of flowers. Carlisle looked at me with a knowing smile at Bella's face. I smirked back.

Carlisle and I approached Bella first and he said, "Sorry about all this. We tried to reign Alice in." He took her hands, squeezing them.

"As if that were even possible." Esme and I said together. Esme hugged her first, and then I did.

"Happy Birthday Bella!" Esme said.

"Thanks." Bella sounded so over her birthday already.

Everyone turned as there was a clicking noise and Alice said apologetically, "I found it in your bag. You mind?"

"Dating an older woman. Hot." Emmett said to Edward.

I snorted, "Em bear. . ."

Things got awkward quickly. It seemed only Alice had an enthusiasm for tonight, dancing around to get a present, pretty much forcing it into Rosalie's hand and saying, "You first Rosalie."

Rose quickly held it out to Bella and said, "It's a necklace. Alice picked it out."

"I want cake." I muttered quietly so that only the vampires can hear me, and Carlisle and Jasper chuckled.

"Thanks." Bella said.

Alice dragged Edward over to take a picture of the two of them together and I turned to Carlisle, putting my hands on his shoulders. I stared up at him with a small smile on his face, tuning out the world behind me.

Until Alice said, "Open Davina and Carlisle's."

I turned, coming to stand by Bella's side, bouncing up and down on the balls of my feet.

"Just a little something to brighten your day." Carlisle said softly.

"Yes, because you've been looking kind of. . . pale lately." I smirked. Emmett laughed behind me.

Bella had difficulty opening it up, and when she finally did, she let out a little 'ow', holding up her hand to show blood running down her finger. "Paper cut," was all she said before turning back to open up the airplane tickets.

I felt my body stiffen because there was now blood exposed. I turned to look at Jasper- because he was the one I was most worried about with bloodlust being an emotion- and saw that his eyes were slowly darkening.

Only Edward seemed to notice as I went to stand in front of Bella. He pushed, missing Bella, hitting me, sending me crashing into Bella, both of us slamming into the back wall. I was on my feet in an instant, ignoring the glass in my wounds. Edward slammed Jasper backwards so that he crashed into the piano, breaking it.

Carlisle went to grab him, missing, though Emmett managed to wrap one arm around Jasper's waist.

And then I was there, right in front of Jasper, holding his face in my hands. "Jasper." I said quietly. "Jasper look at me."

Jasper tried to focus his eyes on me. "Don't breathe." I whispered. "Close off that sense. Keep your eyes on me."

Blood steadily dripped from my arm from the glass, making Carlisle's eyes flicker a little.

"Jasper, look at me." I continued as Edward zoomed to Bella's side. "Emmett, slowly let go of Jasper."

Emmett did as I commanded and I started moving forwards, pushing Jasper a little until he was walking backwards on his own and we were out of the house.

Once we were out in the fresh air, the tension seemed to disappear and I pulled Jasper into a hug. "It's alright Jaz, you're okay."

Jasper let out a stuttering breath. "I am weak Mama."

"No, no you're not. You're new. Carlisle has had three hundred years of practice and everyone's blood tests someone differently. Carlisle almost lost it with my blood in there too. It's practice Jasper. Practice makes perfect. If it takes you ten years, twenty years, another century, it doesn't mean you're weak. You have your own difficulties to deal with. All the other vampires in there had to deal with the lust of Bella's blood too. It just heightens yours as well."

"You're bleeding." Jasper said softly.

"Yes, but I'll be alright. My blood only seems to tempt Carlisle. You don't want to drink it, do you?"

Jasper paused, giving a tentative sniff, before shaking his head, "It doesn't. . . it doesn't appeal the way it should."

"You okay?" Alice asked, coming to stand out as well. Rosalie, Esme, and Emmett disappeared out into the forest.

"I'm going to go see Carlisle, you can take things from here." I told Ali, kissing Jasper's cheek.

Edward came out too, looking dead inside. I went to touch his shoulder but he was gone in a flash, leaving me hurt and confused.

I made my way up the stairs as I heard small clinking sounds coming from Carlisle's office. I stopped outside the door, listening.

". . . been away from human blood as long as the rest of us." Carlisle explained softly.

"How do you do it?" Bella asked.

"Years and years of practice." Carlisle sighed.

"Did you ever think of just doing it the easy way?" Bella asked.

"No." Carlisle said simply.

I looked into the office and saw Bella gripping his shirt, her arm extended. He was busy stitching up her wound.

"I knew who I wanted to be. I wanted to help people. Brings me happiness. Even if I am damned regardless."

He had never told me that. That he feared he was damned.

"Damned? Like hell?" Bella questioned.

Carlisle didn't answer.

"Carlisle you couldn't be damned. You couldn't. It's impossible."

"Thank you, Bella. You've always been very gracious about us." Carlisle said.

"So that's it?" Bella asked after a moment. "That's why he won't change me?"

"Imagine the situation in reverse." Carlisle touched her chin, making my heart clench in. . . was that jealousy? Surely not. . .

He moved away, grabbing a stick, lighting it on fire, and dipping it into the bowl of blood and gauze.

"If you believed as Edward does, could you take away his soul?"

I stepped away from the office, moving quietly down to the bedroom.

Carlisle P.O.V.

I knew Davina heard every word between us and when I touched Bella's chin, I heard her heart skip. I hoped she didn't think I didn't love her. I did. I loved Davina immensely.

Davina's footsteps moved away from the office, moving upstairs towards our bedroom.

Edward came back to drive Bella home and I went upstairs to the bedroom.

"Davina?" I asked, stepping into the room.

She looked up from her position on the floor. She was sitting near the footstool, a pair of tweezers in her hand, pulling the glass from her own wound, dropping it into a small bowl like the one I had used with Bella.

"Hey." She whispered softly, putting the tweezers down, running a wet cloth over the wound to clean it before she reached for a needle and some thread.

I was by her side in an instant, "I hope you weren't going to try and stitch it up yourself."

Normally she would make some sort of joke, give me a teasing smile. Instead, she simply shrugged, leaning her head back. That troubled me and I picked up the needle, starting to work gently on her arm.

I smelled something different, salt water, and I looked around for the source and saw Davina had tears running down her face.

"Davina!" I asked in alarm. "Are you alright? If the needle-"

"It's not the needle." Davina murmured, opening her dark eyes to meet mine. I finished off the stitches, lighting the blood and such on fire, feeling I could breathe easier now.

"What is it?" I asked as she climbed into my lap, wrapping her arms underneath mine, squeezing my hips with her legs, burying her head into my shoulder.

"Do you. . . do you think you are damned?"

"I believe that if I redeem myself, then no, I am not damned." I said softly.

"What could you possibly have to redeem yourself from!" Davina cried. "You're perfect. You've never killed a single person. You save people in hospitals. You try and help people! You do help people! If you think you're damned then I have no hope."

I was surprised by this outburst. I wanted to tell her that there was nothing she could've done in her life that would condemn her to hell- except becoming a vampire- but I knew I didn't know everything about her.

"Davina. . ." I said softly, stroking her hair back behind her ear.

"Carlisle." Another voice said and we both looked up to see Edward there. "We need to speak. As a family. Davina, you should go home."

Davina's face showed a little hurt and confusion. They all called her mom or equivalents. Never Davina- not after she accepted to be their mom anyways. This wasn't good.

I kissed her firmly and said, "I love you."

"I love you 3000." She said with a small smile.

"I actually got that one." I muttered, standing, helping her to her feet.

She grinned, "Marvel fan eh? Should've known. I'll see you at work tomorrow." She kissed me cheek, touched Edward's shoulder gently, her face dropping slightly when he didn't respond to her, and then walked down the stairs.

"Edward-" I started but he cut me off.

"We need to leave." Edward said.

"I'm not leaving Davina." I said sharply, vamping down to the living room where the rest of the family was waiting. Jasper was standing next to Alice, looking upset. Emmett and Rosalie had already packed. Esme looked torn.

"Carlisle, you know we have to leave." Edward said. "Bella and Davina will be better off if we leave."

"Whoa wait." Emmett said. "We're leaving Mama bear behind?"

"We have to Emmett." Edward said. "They'll be better off."

"Edwards right." I muttered. Everyone's heads spun to me.

"Wait, what?" Rose asked. "I don't like Bella, but mom-"

"We're leaving." I insisted.

'WHOA NO WE AREN'T!!' Lord shouted inside of me. 'WE'RE NOT LEAVIG OUR MATE!'

"Carlisle." Esme warned.

"What happened to Bella could've been Davina. In fact, it did happen to Davina and it would've been worse if Bella hadn't softened some of the blow. We're leaving tonight and we're doing it to protect both of them."

"I'll tell them at the same time." Edward said. "After school tomorrow."

I nod, "Tell her- Davina- that we'll keep in touch, I'm not breaking up with her. I have her phone number after all. And that I'll come and visit before spring break hits."

Without waiting to see if Edward would listen to me, I made my way up to the office so that I could cover my art pieces and furniture.

Davina P.O.V.

I didn't have work at the hospital and I got a text from Edward that said he wanted to meet me at Bella's house.

I frowned, but told Bella I'd follow her home. Upon arriving there, Edward was still in the clothes that he had been wearing at the party last night- a dark blue button up shirt with black dress pants and a black dress coat- and I realized that he wasn't here to deliver pleasant news.

"Hey." Bella said.

He wouldn't look at either us, shifting his head towards the forest and said, "Come take a walk with me."

Bella and I walked after him, deep into the forest, but not to far, just enough that we could just make out the path back towards the house.

Edward stopped walking finally, not looking at us still. After a few moments of awkward waiting he said, "We have to leave Forks."

Well, that was fine. I was doing online college so I could do my college while traveling. It might mean that I would have to reveal my secret before I was ready so that they understood the hate or the love I got from people but that was alright if it meant that I got to keep Carlisle. I didn't really have any other family besides Sam anyways so it didn't matter to much if I had to leave.

"Why?" Bella asked.

"Carlisle's supposed to be ten years older than he looks." Edward said, putting his hands in his pockets. I leaned against a tree, glad for the thick blue rain jacket I was wearing that protected my clothing from the moss. "And people are starting to notice."

Okay. That made sense. Was he really trying to pose as forty-three though? I don't know. He looked like he should've said he was twenty-five.

Edward was finally staring Bella in the face, completely avoiding me and I suddenly had a very bad feeling about this. . . why hadn't Carlisle come to say this to me? Why was Edward having to tell both Bella and I?

"Okay. . ." Bella sounded confused, but still steady. "I've got to think of something to say to Charlie."

When Edward didn't answer, it hit her and me both. "When you say 'we'. . ."

"I mean my family and myself." Edward finished Bella's statement.

"Edward, what happened with Jasper, it's nothing." Bella protested.

"You're right. It was nothing." Edward said, staring at a spot on the forest floor that was between her and me. "Nothing but what I always expected. And nothing compared to what could of happened." He finally glanced at me, "Carlisle agrees. You two just don't belong in our world."

I found I had nothing I could say but Bella did, "I belong with you."

"No. You don't." Edward continued.

I took a step back. That was why Carlisle hadn't come. Carlisle had never struck me as a coward. But he didn't even have the courage to tell me he no longer loved me to my face.

I could pretty much feel my heart breaking in two and now, I was certain of why I felt sick the way I had all day. Because Carlisle was gone and the soulmate bond knew it, even if I hadn't. And somehow, the knowledge of it seemed to hurt even more because of it.

"I'm coming." Bella gritted out.

"Bella leave it." I whispered out. Why would she go if he obviously didn't want her?

"Bella. . . I don't want you to come."

I wanted to leave, but my feet didn't seem to want to move.

"You don't want me?" Bella asked, trying to sound out the words.

"No."

"That changes things. A lot."

"But if it's not to much to ask. Can you just promise me something? Don't do anything reckless. For Charlies' sake. And I'll promise you both something in return- this will be the last time you see any of us. None of us will come back. And you can go on with your life without any interference from us. It will be like. . . we never existed. I promise."

Bella couldn't seem to accept it. But I had accepted it the moment we'd come into the forest. "If this is about my soul, take it. I don't want it without you!"

"Its not about your soul. You're just not good for me. And Davina terrible for Carlisle."

"Not good enough for you." Bella changed.

"I'm just sorry I let this go on for so long." Edward said.

Sound seemed to stop working in my ears. The way that the sound had stopped when the bombs had gone off. Like my eardrums had ruptured.

Pure silence, pure bliss. There was a haze swimming in front of my eyes, a pain stabbing me in the stomach.

No.

I had sworn I would never let myself get hurt like this again! NOT AGAIN!

I looked up and saw both Edward and Bella were gone. Edward- my son, my youngest son- had left no footprints. But Bella's led deeper into the forest.

Looking up, I saw the sky had grown darker. Ah shit, I had been out of it for a long time.

I struggled to my feet. Alright, I would go and find Bella. I had to find Bella and bring her back before Charlie sent out a search party for her.

I struggled forward, my eyes glued to the prints of her rainboots. Thank Forks for constant mud even when there was no rain.

After some time though- I had no idea how long as the pain in my stomach made everything seem worse- the prints started to disappear and I looked around wildly. I was hopelessly lost.

"Shit." I cursed. I was so angry, I wanted to punch something. I was angry at Carlisle for leaving me. I was angry at Bella for trailing farther in. I was angry at Em, Rose, Jaz, Ali, and Eddie for leaving me- their supposed mother. I was mad at Esme for not convincing her brother to stay. I was mad at myself for falling in love.

I was mad at myself for not dying when I should've.

"Bella!" I called, trying to find her. It was starting to rain again, tears and water rushing down my face, obscuring my vision. I pulled the jacket around me tighter, tripping over a log and falling flat on my face.

Part of me just wanted to lie there, stay there, but I couldn't. I wiped mud from my face, anger spiking up inside of me. It felt hot. It felt like something, something animal-like, wanted to burst from my skin.

And then another spike of pain washed over me, making me cold again and I continued on.

Finally, I spotted her, curled up in a ball. Thank God she was wearing a yellow rain jacket.

I slid down the muddy bank. My shoes were totally ruined, my hair a mess, mud covering my entire front. I was so glad I hadn't worn anything nice today.

I heard growling and froze, pulling out my pocket knife like that would do anything, looking around wildly, inching closer to Bella.

The black wolf appeared and I let out a sigh of relief, putting the small blade back in my pocket as Sam morphed back. I looked upwards as he put his jeans on.

"Davina, are you alright?" Sam asked, looking my body up and down and the mess that I was in.

"No, not really." I said, trying not to cry. "Sam. . . Carlisle left."

I swallowed hard, taking in a shaking breath and wiped under my eyes. "And Edward came to tell the both of us and I think she chased after him."

"Davina, I'm sorry." Sam said softly.

I shook my head, "No. It's my fault. I should never have fallen for him in the first place. I swore I'd never fall for someone again and I did so it's my bloody fault."

Sam knelt down to scoop Bella up in his arms.

"Just follow me. Don't fall okay?" Sam asked.

I nodded, following him. He found a shorter route out of the forest, ending in front of Charlie's house were lots of people had gathered for a search party. Charlie ran over.

"She's all right." Sam said in an authoritative voice as Charlie tried taking Bella into his arms, "I've got her. Thank you Sam."

I stayed by Sam's side, watching as Harry Clearwater gave him the slightest of nods.

"Let's get you home." Sam muttered.

"My bikes in the driveway." I whispered.

I climbed on behind Sam and he drove towards my house. I now had a pounding headache too, along with the pain in my chest.

"Sam, pull over." I groaned. "SAM!"

He pulled over with a screeching halt and I fell off the bike, the pain exploding and I threw up several times.

"Davina!"

I held out a hand, testing to see if I was going to throw up anymore. "Sam. . . I don't. . . I don't feel good. The soulmate bond. . ."

"Soulmate bond?" Sam questioned, holding my face in his hands. "What soulmate bond?"

"Jasper. . . he said that Carlisle and I had something called a third tier soulmate bond. It's the. . . the strongest bond. And that a separation of great distance would cause the female and the male pain, but the female more. . . I don't remember everything exactly. But there is so much pain Sam." I started to cry.

Sam gathered me up in his arms, climbing back on the bike, zooming faster towards my house.

He parked the bike sloppily, opening the door and rushing me upstairs. I wasn't entirely sure what was happening until he sat me down on the edge of the tub, turning the water on, plugging the drain so that it would fill up.

"Do you want me to stay?" Sam asked.

"It's okay." I murmured, "We both know. . . yes please stay."

Sam pretty much had to undress me because I was slowly losing it. I wasn't sure why. I had never felt anything like this before. I mean, I had felt heart break but I hadn't reacted like this before. Last time had just been a lot of anger, feeling red hot- sometimes almost getting as hot as Sam felt- before another emotion quickly set in to make it go away.

"S-Sam?" I choked out as he slid me into the hot water.

"Yes?"

"When you. . . the first time you transformed, what did it feel like?"

Sam was quiet for a moment and then said, "I. . . I felt this pressure building up inside of me. I was scared, terrified. I had no idea what it was. I didn't know if it was hormones or what. And then I got angry and I turned. I spent three weeks as a wolf before I turned back. Though I'd gone crazy. Then the council leaders met with me, told me what had happened, why I had become what I am and that was because of vampires. If there's a vampire, you need a werewolf. To keep balance."

"I see." I responded, shivering despite the warm water. The headache was even worse now and I cried out, pressing my fingers to my temples on either side of my head like it would make the headache go away.

"Davina!"

"It hurts so badly Sam." I cried weakly. "How am I going to keep going? I've only felt like this for a few hours and I just want to fall asleep and not wake up! How can I go like this for weeks! For months! Will it be like this for the rest of my life?"

Sam's eyes were tortured, staring down at me. He smoothed my long hair back. "It's okay. It's going to be okay. I'm here."

I don't know if I fell asleep in the bath tub or if I passed out. Regardless, the next day I woke up in my bed, Sam asleep on the floor next to me. A week passed of pain, crying, screaming, and Sam's tortured eyes, trying to get me to eat and drink. I wanted to- but it was like I physically couldn't.

And then after a week- the pain stopped.

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schafpudel · 3 months

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No you don't understand. I don't like fan kids because a couple needs biological children to be complete and happy or whatever. That's gross. I like bio-fankids because I want to create the anime girl/boy/etc equivalent of a designer dog. If it's 1/4 catgirl 1/8 dragon and has a hereditary cursed illness and Yu-Gi-Oh hair and 5000 mental illnesses from being the product of parents who should never be responsible for a human child, that's actually ideal. That's the perfect fandom oc

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drakkonyan · 4 months

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Who are your OCs?

KSJAJDJAJKAAA I CAN TALK ABOUT THEM THANKS!!!!!!

My main fellas come all em with a LOT of world building, but I'll try to synthetaze it as much as I can! Tldr: they all come from different dimensions with different vibes and biology (one of em is like a medieval fantasy land, one is like a scify robot land, etc etc) and there is some sort of past war-hostility between all em.

First I'll talk bout Mawla. She is the oldest one I've created, but also the one with the best defined personality for now. Basically she was originally an orphan taken by the government to experiment in, as a way to research protesis and quick DNA alteration to use for medical purposes in the upcoming war. Once they where done with her she got cryogenizised for further study and learning material by medical students. But after several years (once war was rather settled) she somehow escaped. All those process had a toll on both her body and mind of course, so she became rather cold and mostly non-verbal as a result to all that. The only thing that kinda helped her heal was meeting who she calls her brother, Ray.

Which speaking of, he was originally an experimental medic AI applied to a soldier robot to heal and rescue individuals the government considerated of interest, but he became revelious because like, war and such. So he ran out, not without his body getting hurt. Fortunately he is a robot so he can just like, rebuild himself with scrap parts and such. He just wandered around without too much purpose for several decades until he found Mawla and they both helped eachother.

Then on the completely oposite side of the multuverse there's Fritz, who is some sort of totem-elemental golem creature-thing. Basically his species is called elementals, which are born when a soul is forced to reincarnate into a body and then imbued with some sort of natural element a la pokemon style. He was originally created to be used as a beast-weapon for the war, but was then rescued by his adoptive father, who was a blacksmith mage. He was eventually killed under mysterious circunstance and thus Fritz had to to escape since the government considered his species too dangerous to be let free (as wizards would usually create them and threat them as beast to be tamed and kept under their control rather than actual individuals) he went around for a while until he met Kass

And finally about her. Kass is part of a colony settled in what is like a middle space between the 3 main dy mentions. It's like a dead space between em 3 that isnt reclaimed by any of them, so several opositors from all of them settled there and eventually became a wasted land. She was part of a small village that got burned down by bandits. She went out living from what she could get and kinda becoming a bountyhunter until she met Fritz, they became professional partners and then met Mawla and Ray, who joined them.

I really don't know what most of this is but this is my most planned out and complex story I've made so I keep it around and I'll eventually make something outta it because like, hell, look at all of what I already have written, plus all of the world building not included, several support character and strangled family members from each all of em and several parallels that I wanna pan out more. Like the fact that they all where created rather as tools to be used and discarted rather than as people with emotions and feelings and the such. Several relationships, plot twist, that kinda thing. So even if yeah a medieval story with dragons that also is an alien scify and a furry contemporary story and a cyberpunk-wasteland survival of the strongest a la fall out sounds farfetched, it's my story so I'll tell it some day.

Also both Fritz and Ray have that "acts ad thinks like a kid but it's actually a 5000 year old dragon" except they both are young adults. That's basically a plot device for me to have both characters that knew their world before the war, characters that lived said war and characters that lived the consecuencies of the war. But putting 3 whole characters in the freezer was kinda convenient so instead I did this. May change it so they did have like a time skip (like making ray get turn off for certain time? Idk) but I'll have to think of it.

Also making them both long-lived allows me to make them survive their loved ones for centuries for extra angst nyehehehehe >¦}

Thanks for giving me a space to yap bout em! Ik this is my blog but sometimes the current hyperfix takes me by the throat and I need external input for me to come back to my kiddos :)

#Text #Astray #Holy shit I really infodumped here lmaooo

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womenfearmecomputerswantme · 1 year

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Welcome back again creatures of flesh and blood!

Inspired by @oc-tournament and @small-artist-oc-showdown (i need promo) I have decided to repurpose this contest account to create an oc contest, which I like to call.

THE BEST MECHANICAL SILLY OC COMPETITION

But sir, what is a mechanical silly?

Great question! A mechanical silly is what I've decided to call any robot, AI, or computer that gained sentience or free will.

They don't necessarily have to be silly.

Examples of mechanical sillies going by this definition include: Connor (DBH), Wall-E (Wall-E), AM (I have no mouth and I must scream), Edgar (Electric Dreams), Eric & Deborah Bot 5000 (TM vs TM)

Wow! I sure am excited to see my own mechanical characters fight to death, how can I submit them?

I have actually made a google form this time, you can submit your characters in there.

As for general rules:

Don't submit nsfw reference images

No fandom ocs (sorry)

They have to fit the mechanical silly description

When will this battle begin?

When there are enough submissions! (Around 150)

Machine, what pronouns do you use?

He/It, thank you very much

LET THE SUBMISSIONS BEGIN

oh yeah also the hastag of this contest is #mechanicalsillyoccontest

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drunkenskunk · 4 months

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So there's a fanfic I've been trying to write for the last several years, and I haven't been making much progress. On average, I've been writing 5000 words in it every 6 months or so. I keep trying to make progress, but it's difficult to find the motivation to continue, since it seems like nobody gives a shit. And it's just a feedback loop of the longer it takes me to write, the less interest there is, and the harder it is for me to motivate myself, which takes me longer to write...

But there's also another project I've been working on: creating a whole bunch of redacted documents about an OC of mine, and then putting them all together in a physical file folder, as if some fictional agency of multiverse space cops has been building an intelligence dossier. The latest document is a 10-page-long transcript of an operation where they tried to capture her, but it went very wrong.

But also, I've been trying to work on a short story about the character I've been playing in the weekly Lancer game. It's called "Scarlet's Last Normal Day on Hell's Gate," and it is exactly what it sounds like from the title: following her life on the station, the literal day before the Class 2 Printer breaks, and the campaign of In Golden Flame kicks off.

But also, I've been stressed about my computer so much that I haven't streamed in over a week. This in itself has caused a slight crisis, because see it's making me question if this whole streaming habit hobby is even worth it. I've been doing it for 2 years, and haven't seen any tangible results. It's just made me more stressed and tired and it takes up valuable time I don't have that I could've been spent trying to write or draw and oh god the streaming is why my hands haven't been working in years, isn't it?

But the computer situation is also stressful. See, I'm just knowledgeable enough about my computer to get me into trouble, but I'm not knowledgeable enough to get me out. I think there's some kind of overheating issue: sometimes, when I play or stream some games, my computer will unexpectedly stop. The fans spin like a jet engine, everything freezes, the monitors go black and display the words "DVI NO SIGNAL" and the only input it will accept is me holding down the power button to force shut down. And it's like, I don't know what the problem is. Is it the case fans that need replacing? Is it a problem with the fans and/or heat sink on the graphics card? Is there a fault in the liquid cooling system? Has the thermal paste on the CPU worn out because the computer is just over 5 years old? Or is it something else entirely that I'm just not knowledgeable enough to even be aware of?

So that means there's the issue of what to do about this computer. Because even getting it to a shop to figure out what's wrong is going to be tricky, as I don't own (can't afford) a car, so how would I get it there? And even if I somehow found a way to get it there and back, is getting it fixed to keep this old bitch limping along for a few more years even worth it? Even before (what I assume are) the overheating issues, it was still showing its age. The computer might be 5 years old, but the graphics card was low-mid range, even when I got it. And it's becoming increasingly clear that 4 tb of space split between 2 hard drives might have been fine in 2019, it absolutely isn't enough now.

But if I decide to get a new computer, the only way I'd be able to pay for it is by pulling money from what used to be the "Emergency Bug Out Fund," an amount of money I had squirreled away in case of "emergency." Problem is, that moment of "emergency" where that money could've been useful already came and went. It's not enough for me to escape the United States. And even if it was enough, I never made a proper plan, because I was too busy surviving. And even if I had enough and put together a proper plan... where the fuck could I even escape? Setting aside how hostile to trans people most of the world seems to be now anyway, the reach of the Imperial American Hegemony is global, and they've proven time and again that they do not give a shit about sovereignty or international law. And it's only going to get worse after the election...

Pulling from that fund feels like me admitting defeat. I'm going to be stuck here in this hostile police state of a country, working until I die, desperately trying to make just enough money to pay off my increasingly absurd ransom rent each month, as it feels like all the things that used to bring me joy are just causing me stress.

I'm so tired.

#drunk skunk #drunk skunk lore #depression #current mood

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clonefandomevents · 1 year

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212th Bingo Rules and Rewards!

Rules:

There aren’t really a lot of rules, just like our other Bingos. Just two major big ones that are necessary for your work to be part of the Bingo.

It must be centered around a member of the 212th Cody, Waxer, Boil, Wooley, Gregor, Trapper, Longshot, Gearshift or any other named 212th trooper. 212th OC clones are also welcome, as long as they are one of the golden troopers! Since he is a member of the 212th, Obi-Wan is also acceptable. But since this is a clone centric event we do ask that at least one of the vod'e are also a main character. As long as one of them is the focal point of the creation, then it qualifies! All ships, other characters including OC’s and scenarios are welcome as long as it is 212th focused.

Respect other people’s creations! Because this is open to all ships and characters, it is only plausible that someone’s creation wont be to your liking. If it is brought to our attention that anyone participating in the Bingo is harassing other participants for what they are creating, then they will likely be barred from continuing to participate. This event is designed to give love to the 212th and built up the community, and we can’t do that if we are attacking each other.

The most important thing is to have fun! We want everyone to enjoy the event

Rewards:

Currently, we have no set end timeline for the Bingo. It will run for as long as people wish to play! With the open ended timeline, we wanted to set incentives for completing bingos! There are three levels of rewards.

Bingo Line: If you complete a straight line, vertical, horizontal or diagonal, you will be able to request either an icon/header or a gif!

An X, a Square or an Aurebesh 2 (Top row, the third row and the bottom row with one connecting the third and top), you will be able to request either a short fic (500-1000 words) or a sketch to flat color art.

If you complete a blackout, you can request either both a short fic and sketch art, or a longer fic (up to 5000 words) or fully shaded and complete art.

Please note that both mods are participating in other fandom events and do have real life obligations as well. The Rewards may not always be able to be instantaneous, but we will do our best to get them finished within a reasonable amount of time of you completing a bingo.

Posting:

Posting will be really simple! If you post on Ao3, be sure to add it to the Collection, ‘212th Bingo 23’. If you post on Tumblr, tag us at clonefandomevents and tag your post with #212thbingo23. If you plan on posting somewhere else, please let us know so that we see what you have created!

We will have the bingo card request form up soon! Meant to have it done by today, but those real life obligations got in the way. It will be soon though, as we can’t wait to see what you all have in mind to create!

Here is an example of an aurebesh 2 bingo! (Also, I am just now realizing the 2's in the card are wrong. So, if you make a bingo in the style of how they are on the card, that is also 100% acceptable!)

#212th bingo #212th attack battalion #fandom event #fandom bingo #commander cody #clone trooper waxer #clone trooper boil #clone trooper wooley #captain gregor #clone trooper longshot #clone trooper gearshift #clone trooper trapper #212th oc clones #bingo rules and rewards

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changelingsandothernonsense · 1 year

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Congratulations! You've been given the opportunity to create a brand new NPC for vanilla Skyrim, completely with vanilla bugs.

Who would this person be? How did they get to Skyrim? What are some funny things they might say in passing? Would they be a follower -- and if so, how would they fight? If not, why? and are they safe? Feel free to elaborate and answer unasked questions about this critter. (: This can be related to your fic(s) and/or existing OCs or completely separate just for fun.

Thanks for the tags @mareenavee and @paraparadigm, I finally have time to write about the idea of Sydari as an NPC/Follower. If you want to do this too go ahead, all my moots have been tagged already because 14 hours ahead also means 24 hours behind in the upside-downundah! XD

Sydari Aralen is a fixture at the Ragged Flagon in the Ratways of Riften, though you'll find she has acquaintances across both Skyrim and, unexpectedly, Raven Rock as well. You'll first find her at the bar of the Thieves Guild hang-out, probably planning their next game night (cards, expensive mead for cheap, a sack of septims or twelve). You wonder where the new Guild Master's priorities lay when this seems to be what their recruits concern themselves with but she says "So long as I bring in coin, Nightingale doesn't care what we do in our spare time, and I bring in ALOT of coin".

You can only convince her to follow you if you make it worth her while. You'll need either 500 septims minimum (but she'll haggle you, she actually wants 1000, and she might throw in a 5000 septim joke, depending on where you find her) or a high persuasion check (you'll at least need to pass a medium one in order to haggle her down from 1000 to 800 and a high one to haggle down to 500.)

You'll find she knows a lot of people and is on a first-name, no-pay basis with Dagur and Haran at the Frozen Hearth in Winterhold. She'll ask you not to mention anything about Riften, or that she's from the Guild. "I have a good thing going here, they don't need to know about that".

She gets cagey on entering Eastmarch, and as you get closer to Windhelm she'll start wearing a hood and face scarf, her demeanour changes and she'll keep her head down inside the city. She'll refuse to enter Candlehearth Hall, insisting on staying "Somewhere she's more comfortable" and won't travel the city at night. If you enter the inn she will not follow you. (With a few exceptions, dunmer are generally not allowed in there in my fic so...) You will instead find her either in the New Gnisis Cornerclub, drinking at the bar or, if you're into lockpicking past 8pm, you'll find she's actually staying at Sadri's Used Wares.

Press her (achieve a medium persuasion check) and you'll find she's been in a dysfunctional on-and-off again relationship with Revyn Sadri for a long time, and they sort of just fall into that pattern whenever she enters the city. (Her relationship with Brand-Shei is also contentious, he won't sell to you if she's present, finding out why is another persuasion check, though it's dependent on how much she likes you. They had a messy, messy not entirely finalised divorce).

Pass a high persuasion check and you'll find that she grew up in the Gray Quarter, she did a lot during that time that she'd rather not do again, if you press her further and fail the persuasion check she'll leave your service. You'll need to pay her the full 1000 septims (she won't haggle), or you can get her a gift (you'll be able to get her a gift later anyway and you can't spam the same thing). If you bring her some Nightshade, Deathbell or Lavender she'll be delighted. (She really likes purple flowers, no one ever buys her flowers, buy her some damn flowers LDB).

If you didn't fail the persuasion check then she'll spill, she'll tell you that she grew up doing whatever she could just to survive, and when her brother, Edras died she sold herself as well. She hates Windhelm, she would rather avoid the area, and to be honest she can't really be there. She'll tell you there's a high bounty on her head because she beat the brother of Galmar Stone-Fist half to death after he violated her. She still leaves your service but you won't have to pay her again. She usually goes back to Riften. After some time, she'll ask you to help her out with a heist, it'll be a random necklace, ring or circlet. She just wanted to float the idea across.

If you dismiss her after this she won't go back to Riften. Think of it in a similar way to the missing follower bug, but she's not actually missing, she's scripted to go to Raven Rock.

Eventually, she'll send you a letter asking for your help, she wants to fund an expedition but also steal the spoils right out from under the crew. It's expensive and she says she'll totally split the reward three ways. You just have to come to Raven Rock and hear her out.

If you do go to Raven Rock and take her up on her offer you'll find her at the Retching Netch. She'll either be sitting at the bar on the bottom floor or she may be sitting opposite a masked mercenary on the top floor laughing about gods know what. She seems more cheerful in the ash wastes, though you can't understand why.

Her personal quest ties in directly with Unearthed. You'll meet the um other "investor" and find that the two of them have come up with a ridiculous plan to swindle Ralis Sedarys out of the Relics of Ahzidal. The two of them (Sydari and her Mercenary friend) thought they could bring in another partner (they don't need one they just don't want to spend all their money). You find the whole thing suspect, and you ask her whether the Guild Master knows she's doing this? To which she replies:

"Hun, I am the Guild Master, I can do whatever I want".

If you do go along with their plan you can try to get her to turn on her partner (this will not work and she'll kick you out of the group, you don't get any rewards). She'll warn you that it's non-negotiable, you now have to deal with the two of them as a package deal. She's much more talkative and relaxed at this point. You can give her a gift here, it'll be a diary from her mother that you find in one of the abandoned houses in Raven Rock. It gives her some answers about where she's really from and the kind of person her mother was. She's forever in your debt from this point on and won't just randomly leave your service though you still can't ask her to swindle the Merc, it's non-negotiable.

If you turn them down you'll find them later at Kolbjorn Barrow, wrangling a possessed Ralis. If you intervene and don't kill him then she may let you keep some of their loot. If you kill Ralis she'll be upset but thank you for at least helping out, she'll tell you there's probably some loot left over in the tombs, she and her partner seem to have filled their packs with loot and touching it will turn them both hostile. Please don't turn them hostile, you're not going to have any fun.

She'll stay on Solstheim from that point onwards and will offer you training in Stealth. You'll get the odd random event where she might pop up in Skyrim stealing from any of the Jarl's residences in almost every hold (Windhelm she just won't touch). She can also be used as a fence.

As far as combat is concerned she's mostly ranged, she uses an enchanted Stalhrim bow called "Ice". She also happens to wield a curious Daedric dagger with a unique enchantment "The Razor" (I have her using Mehrunes Razor in game so it's kinda just a thing). She wears a full set of Nightingale Armour (which is also an alias she shares with Karliah) and knows two spells, Lightning Bolt and Soul Trap. She only uses Lightning Bolt and does so sparingly. She's not a marriage option for a few reasons, which you can probably figure out from dialogue.

#Tag games #Sydari Aralen #as a temporary follower #Yes she's attached once you meet her on Solstheim #I can't think of many bugs I've had them ironed out for so long #But definitely using the missing follower problem

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undeadvinyls · 1 year

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what kind of aliens are they?? as in the zombie ocs

ii should probably mention they r for my "PvZH set expansion project" where i pretty much rewrite/expand on the lore presented by the pvzh card sets!! and they r for the galactic gardens expansion, so. i should possibly explain how my take on pvz works like so

HUGE rambling under the cut, but appreciated if ppl would read it :]

Basics:

Let's start with the fact that the mere existence of zombies & plants living on different planets/different galaxies is actually something known, but here we will focus on the zombies side.

The space is inhabited with both zombies and plants, but zombies seem to dominate the galaxy more as a species. They are some galaxies were the plants are dominating, but most of space systems are zombie-dominated, as documented in galactic gardens comic and the Huge Gigantacus one, where we see more of zombies than plants.

The "earth zombies became aliens because of contact with Meteor Z" thing doesn't exist. Alien zombies are natural and native inhabitants of outer space and planets other than Earth. Meteor Z, like many other celestial bodies, can grand superpowers when in contact with an unliving organism (zombies, hence the name). Not all aliens possess superpowers, some get them accidentally, some on purpose. Meteor Zs are a common thing and are not treated as an illegal contraband.

Biology:

Alien zombies are distinct from each other; aliens are organized into undead species which inhabit different planets or chose a nomadic life style, all depending on the species.

A common trait among alien zombies is antennas, increased number of eyes, difference between norm of heights, etc. Some either decide to have their traits shown or hidden, either by morphing their parts so they disappear or hiding (ex. in hair)

Some alien species possess a thing called 'Full Alien Form" where they can transform their physical look into a way different image and become more chimeric-like in looks. It is not something to be treated as a "curse" though; it is a normal, ordinary thing found in a lot of zombie groups, all because of the otherworldly anatomy. Not all aliens possess a Full Alien Form though.

Law Enforcement:

Similar to the plants' Plant-etary Guard, the zombies do have an undead counterpart of it, it is called the Dead Space Department. Its main purpose is to protect galactic zombies from plants and connect them together.

Each planet, galaxy, etc. has their own rules, but some things are hailed as "intergalactically" illegal by the DSD, such as the Zombot Battlecruiser 5000 (like its flavor text says)

Bounty hunting is also a very common thing. Honestly, there's a lot of bounty hunters in space, either working alone or for some faction. Bounty Hunters are not that much wanted by DSD; unless they have done a crime against zombies. Plant-etary Guard is the faction which is always after a bounty hunter's tail.

Notable species (that I have ocs of!):

some of the most notable alien species featured in my rewrite are:

Arahnens -notable ones are Millisecond, Scarlet, Victoria and An Unseen Unnamed One:tm: BUEBEUB

Cephalins - notable ones are Lorr'aine, Henrique, Clara'beth and Tempest

Vespids (created by @/Scribshade <33) - notable one is Dalton

Cosmic Zombies - notable ones are Ivory

THATS ALL!! tysm for reading : ]]

#tysm for asking that was so fun to answer <33 #phantom answers

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tiredela · 1 year

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Congratulations! You've been given the opportunity to create a brand new NPC for vanilla Skyrim, completely with vanilla bugs.

I wasn't tagged by anyone, but this looks like fun, so I'm doing it anyways :')

Her name is Invidiosa Maledictio, and she is just a normal Imperial mage doing normal Imperial mage things. Really. She lives in a modest shack near Ivarstead, and can be found outside during the day tending her chickens and her small garden (she lives self-sufficiently), but you can't sell her her own produce. In the late afternoon/evening, she goes back inside, where she sits and eats in front of a huge bookcase, occasionally casting candlelight or a low-level healing spell. At around 10 pm she goes down into her Top Secret basement that is conveniently hidden behind a chest, but you can't access it, as it requires a key, which for some reason can't be pickpocketed from her. She only sleeps for three hours every night.

If you talk to Invidiosa, you will learn that she has a deep grudge against one particular imperial soldier, but she never tells you their name, nor what they did to her. She asks you to kill them and bring back their skull as prove. From then on, every dead Imperial will have a skull in their inventory, but the quest will only update once you find the *right* skull. This may take some time, as the *right* Imperial will only spawn as a random encounter somewhere in the Reach. She will give you 5000 gold for bringing back the *right* skull. While this quest is active, if you give her any other skull, she will just say that it isn't the *right* one, but will still gladly accept it and give you 200 gold per skull. When you finish her quest, Invidiosa becomes a follower and a potential marriage candidate, and she will even unlock her basement for you! She also still accepts skulls, and will give you a neat 300 gold each.

If you decide to check out her basement, you will see that it consists of two rooms. In the first room, you'll find an arcane enchanter and an alchemy lab, as well as different ingredients, potions, and soul gems that you can take for free and use to create powerful gear and potions! This is also where she spends most of her time when she's in her basement during the night. In the next room, you'll find- oh. Oh. Huh. So this is where she stashes all the skulls you gave her. Interesting. Depending on how many skulls you brought her, this room may have more or less skulls, but taking a skull from there is considered stealing. If Invidiosa is with you in her basement, she will just say that "you shouldn't worry about these" and that "you two are friends now, and friends have each other's backs, right?". If you decide that you don't like this and you don't want to be friends with a skull-hoarder, and you subsequently attack her, be prepared for a tough fight, as she will unleash her high-level conjuration and destruction spells on you. Once she's out of magicka, you might think that you're safe because she only uses her fists to fight, but then you realize that she wears gloves with a glitched fortify unarmed damage enchantment, and she pretty much insta-kills you.

As a follower, Invidiosa will comment on pretty much every location you go to. She will feel the most comfortable in caves as well as crypts, where she will ask you if "you've found any skulls yet?" to "expand her collection". However, she absolutely hates Solitude and wants to stay far, far away from it, implying that there's someone else there she has a grudge against. She will also be reluctant to go to the College of Winterhold with you. Invidiosa has three idle lines that she likes to say over and over again when she's not in combat ("I heard there's a crypt not far from here. Let's check it out!", "You're the only one I can trust, and I'm glad to have you by my side" and "If you're dead, can I have your skull? I'd get a nice pedestal and decorate it with flowers..."). Speaking of combat, for some reason, her enchanted gloves suddenly un-glitch, which means that she (sadly) isn't able to insta-kill enemies with her fists. However, if you decide to attack her and she leaves your service, her gloves will once again glitch. You can't kill her because she's essential for some reason (likely a left-over from a cut quest).

As a spouse, Invidiosa will lose almost all of her individuality like any other spouse. She will still have preferences for where you two decide to live; she will absolutely hate Solitude with a burning passion and will ask you to move out anytime you talk to her (this is her only line), but will love any of the Hearthfire homes. She can be found at the alchemy lab or arcane enchanter if you have them in your home. Otherwise, she will just stand or sit around all day. She also sleeps more than three hours now.

---

i don't think i'll tag anyone, just do it if you really want to 💪

#this was inspired by my horrible addiction to skull-hoarding #(in-game)#tes #tesblr #skyrim #oc: invidiosa maledictio #i've litterally just created her for this lol #but now i kinda want to play her?#maybe expand her backstory a little bit #tag game #is it still a tag game if no-one tagged you? ehh whatever #tiredeltalks #(also i apologize for any grammatical errors english is not my first language!)

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svampira · 8 months

Note

For Brooklyn and Elias, n.35, what inspired you to create them?

(Asking bc their designs are literally so cool. I would love some insight on that cause I am OBSESSED)

ask game (🥺)

Hiii ty for the question

This is interesting because out of all my ocs they're the ones where I'm less sure about where my inspo came from🤔 especially when it comes to Elias he very much developed as my art improved 👇 here's his earliest design (tw old art...)

By drawing him over and over and using blueish tints over my art all the time he got pinker and pinker and he ended up getting a design that's a little more sleek and cohesive. My main inspos for him were the vtmb toreador fledgling (because he used to be my toreador pc until i decided i liked him being a fledgling too much and changed it so he's the childe of the og toreador fledgling) and with time i ended up getting more and more inspired by other media, for example mahito from jjk, someone's nsfw oc that will go unnamed lmfao, and i started referencing irl people when drawing him to get a feel for proportions and to make his design more consistent. My main inspo is fernando lindez (though they rarely end up looking very alike) and what I try to replicate in Elias are his eye shape and his general facial proportions, i like how all of his features are close together in a way that feels kind of feminine and pretty.

When it comes to Brooklyn instead my inspos are more clear though her design kind of came naturally with me just messing around while practising how to paint darker skin tones. She is also a vtmb fledgling redesign (this time the malkavian one) and one of their clan stereotypes is that they usually get heterochromia. I didn't like the idea of just giving her different eye colors (though that's what ended up happening LMAO) and i looked into like. Pretty pictures of eye trauma😭 examples down here nothing graphic imo

This is not exactly what i had in mind at the time but it's similar so. Just kind of randomly evolved into her whole eye being white as i messed up painting. When it comes to her general design I wanted an excuse to draw lots of fun hairstyles without going against vtm canon (vampires are stuck w the same appearance forever) and whenever I design characters i like to steer kind of minimalistic, so i often end up with making the eyes and hair the same colours because I dont want them to get too busy or overwhelming. I can't even point out specific inspos for her because it's just a very common trope (tempest, yue from atla, 5000 different ocs) but when it comes to irl influences i was inspired by Anok Yai because I'd seen her in an interview and fell in love with her + a lot of other dark skin black super models. That's the main thing with brooklyn she has to give supermodel and very put together which kind of contrasts with her personality being. Completely unhinged. Anyways I don't really reference her much anymore because Brooke's features just kind of fit very nicely with my same face syndrome but here's Anok Yai for fun ^^

#thank yeeww #oh and her name was inspired by fuego in ny/bn and brooke lynn from dr/ag race😭 elias instead i took from that horror podcast i dont like #i think its a greek name. which is fine cause elias is ethnically greek but i dont put any thought into picking names #one of my most plot developed ocs is named yuri hard d/icks cause its a joke in italian. its a videogame character im fine #<the joke is that it means hard difficult times are coming #um. what were we talking about #i ended up making my reply very design focused but if i misinterpreted it/missed anything feel free to ask!!#even outside of ask games i love getting oc questions you are more than entitled to my endless ramblings #ask #<i dont have an organised tag for them yet i need to go back and fix it

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faintvibes · 2 years

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Historical Hetalia Week Day One: Heirlooms

Day One: 10000 BCE - 5000 BCE // Heirlooms @historical-hetalia-week

(Unfortunately, I don't have much for such a long time ago!!)

The heirloom part may not be immediately clear...essentially I was wondering if culture (especially culture and traditions inherited by predecessor civilisations) might be 'heirlooms' to Nations. So, this piece is based on the sharing of cultures and 'creation' of heirlooms. Further explanation below the cut!

My main inspiration for this piece was the book 'Dressed: Fashionable History in Aotearoa [New Zealand] 1840 to 1910' by Claire Regnault. (A book I'd highly recommend, by the way, if you're curious about early colonial NZ history.) While it primarily focuses on the lives of the settlers, especially regarding their fashion, the earlier chapters provide fascinating insights into the interactions between the first settlers and the Māori people pre-dating them.

Pronunciations (there will be a few of these scattered where they are relevant):

Aotearoa- Ow-teh-ah-rowuh (like rower) [aɔˈtɛaɾɔa]

Māori- Mow-ree [ˈmaːɔɾi]

While there were, of course, a variety of reactions (ranging from incredibly racist to surprisingly sympathetic) on the European side, the predominant Māori reaction is what most drew my interest. Presumably because British settlers assumed themselves to be entirely superior to the natives of Aotearoa, they would look condescendingly onto the Māori people and their practices- but the Māori people largely did not hold the same view. As such, Māori who traded with the early Europeans were entirely willing to incorporate aspects of European culture and tradition into their own existing norms.

(**Fair warning for some quotes of racist thinking: Hilariously, to the modern eye, in one European attempt to 'civilise' the Māori women and to instil "moral and industrious Habits" (to quote the Reverend Samuel Marsden), Marianne Williams (née Coldham, 1793-1879) began to teach Māori women how to sew, dress themselves, and generally behave in the European way, horrified by their 'lack of womanliness'. Her sister-in-law would join her three years later. At the time, the Church Missionary Society, who were largely in charge of their endeavour, far preferred married couples to join them in 'educating' the natives, for they feared that single men were "likely to fall into the traps which are continually put in his road by native females". And while men were certainly not involved in the teaching of sewing to Māori women, Marianne and her sister-in-law were not without their own... struggles in this aspect. To quote Marianne: "The tall muscular forms of the Newzealanders flitted before my mind's eye whenever I endeavoured to sleep." I had to laugh when I read that. Oh, the irony. **)

**I'd like to quickly note who, exactly, I'm portraying in my piece. This will better contextualise my illustration. On the right is England (as might be obvious), though the left is a bit more complicated. I personally do not agree with the canon depiction of New Zealand in Hetalia (which, of course, is my own perspective, and I welcome other opinions as well), and so I've created my own oc NZ character. However, she is not in this image. In creating her I had to wonder about her origins- and where she stands considering the great racial divide in her country. My perspective is that, prior to European arrival, there was a representative of the Māori culture as opposed to individual iwi. The colony of New Zealand (and later the country) is both her younger sister and the younger sister of England, stuck in the middle. On the left in this image is the Māori representative (who likely goes by Aotearoa in modern time, at least as one among many names, but who at this point I can only see her calling herself Tangata Whenua)- there will be more explanation on her to convey why all of this is as it is in my mind.

Tangata whenua- Tah-nga-ta fen-oo-a [ˈtaŋata ˈfɛnʉ.a]

In particular (and as is depicted here) the Māori people became enamoured with blankets. This is likely because they could be wrapped around the shoulders and look remarkably like kākahu (picture below) cloaks, which were a way to show social status in Māori culture. Eventually, the Māori traders became so proficient at judging the quality of the blankets Europeans would trade to them, that they were far better judges than the European traders attempting to sell them.

Kākahu- kaah-ka-hoo (couldn't find an IPA for this)

(Taken from Academic Dress Hire. Kākahu is the general word used to refer to Māori cloaks, though there are many individual types with their own names. This depicts one type.)

Another key point of interest is how Māori incorportated European sewing, etc techniques into their own garment creation. Red (whero- pronounced ferroh or ferraw) is a very important colour in Māori tradition, representing high status. Your historic Gucci watch, if you will. So Māori traders were likely ecstatic to see red wool among the many goods offered to them by European traders- both for its presumed price and abundance, and the prior context. This can be seen through kākahu cloaks produced following European contact, many of which incorporated red wool. Below are two examples (both taken from Dressed- apologies for any issues):

(Second image originally from George French Angus' book 'The New Zealanders Illustrated', published 1847)

This mixture of techniques is something I have attempted to depict in this illustration- however I am no expert in kākahu creation, and am not here to pretend that I didn't get something (or multiple things) quite wrong in that aspect. I'm no expert!

This illustration is set vaguely around the 1840s - 50s, though leaning more towards the early 40s. Arthur's outfit is mainly inspired by the following two illustrations from Panorama's 'A History of Fashion: From Loinclothes to Lycra' by Jacqueline Morely, David Salariya, etc, which date to 1828 and 1847 respectively, so take that how you will.

In the illustration, Tangata Whenua and England appear to be working together to construct this kākahu which combines both of their cultural practices into one garment. However, upon further observation, inequalities in this exchange of culture can be observed. For example, Tangata Whenua is entirely clothed in European garments. While she wears the blanket as a cloak substitute (making it a distinctly Māori appropriation), and undoubtedly hasn't bothered herself with the layering of undergarments, etc under her dress, and her hat depicts pohutukawa (paw-hoo-too-kawa) flowers as an added accessory, the point stands that she's made an effort. England, meanwhile, dresses himself in only the European style. Tangata Whenua is the one explaining the process to him and grasping the weaving. While he is curious, it is implied that he's done none of the work. This is meant to draw comparison to relations between Māori and Europeans at this time and onwards. The Māori held respect towards the European way of life, and tried to meet it on equal grounds. Europeans looked condescendingly down onto the Māori way of life, and, while initially intrigued, over time and with more concentrated governance, this would be forgotten, and te Ao (teh ow) Māori would be steamrolled over. For now, Māori remain friendly- but as the wrongs begin to add up, this will change.

(Let's just say New Zealand's early years will be spend embroiled in civil war.)

If you've just read this far for explanation of the post, you've reached your conclusion. From here, I'm gonna talk about my oc and the inspirations behind her :)

Tangata Whenua draws inspiration from two Māori women depicted in Dressed- one in personality, one just had a stunning hat. I've not quite figured out a human name for her yet, but I'm fond of the given name Māra (Maahra). However, Māori traditionally changed their names often, and so this is likely only one of the many names she is known by. Mara (without the ā- pronounced exactly as it looks) is both a term of address to someone close to you in the north, and a word meaning piece/scrap/rag. Māra can mean a garden/cultivation, and related to Māra Tautāne (toe-taahne)- a ceremonial garden where the plants grown within are offered to Rongo (rawngaw) (god of cultivated plants). I feel she got this name when someone (aware or unaware of her nature) addressed her by mara, and she realised its second meaning, as well as its connections to gardens (which I can see as a metaphor for societies, etc, and their growth/cultivation) and thought it quite fitting.

As for her hat, that is inspired by this painting, also by George Angas:

This depicts Toenga (taw-enga) of Ngāti Maru (ngaah-tee Maroo) in a quite fashionable hat. I quite like it, and adapted it (though replaced its flowers with pohutukawas) for Tangata Whenua. I also enjoy the energy Toenga appears to give off- it feels very suitable for Tangata Whenua's personality. However, her primary personality influence is...

Rangi Topeora (Rangi Taw-peh-awhra) of Ngāti Toa (taw-uh) and Ngāti Raukawa (roe-kawa) was a female chief of Ngāti Toa (or so my research seems to imply- sources are frustratingly vague on this) and composer. While there is little information on her- I can find nothing on her birth date, and the range given for death dates is nearly a decade wide- what there is sparks much joy. In Dressed, her relationship with European trader Mayhew (one of many she took) is the main focus where she is mentioned. She admits to being a woman "notorious for following her 'hearts desires'", and I believe that if I had to summarise Tangata Whenua into one short phrase, this is what I would use. Māra is a woman of emotion and desire- that is what motivates her above all else. Another move of hers that I adore is, upon her baptism, Rangi would accept no name except 'te Kuini' (teh koo-ee-nee), which translates to 'the Queen'. She would also at some point adopt the name Wikitōria (wee-kee-taaw-ree-ah), which is the Māori equivalent of Victoria, and one of her husbands was given the name Arapeta (as it looks), which means Albert. She became commonly known as 'the Queen of the South'. Here's a portrait of her from circa 1863, painted by Gottfried Lidauer:

In regards to other notable points of Tangata Whenua visible in this illustration:

I debated with myself over and over again about what I should do regarding her moko kauae (mawkaw k-oh-ay)- the tattoo on her chin, lower lip, and around her upper lip. These are incredibly personal to each individual, and I am no expert in them. Anything I give her will be incorrect, but not giving her anything even more so. Eventually, I settled on referencing a historic tā moko (taah mawkaw- the general name for traditional Māori tattoos)- one which is depicted small and vague enough that surely nothing I interpret from it can be exactly accurate to the original. In that sense, at least, I am hopefully not stealing anyone's identity. If someone happens across this who is more knowledgeable in tā moko than I, I would welcome your opinion on this matter. My intention is absolutely not to appropriate something so personal, but I find myself conflicted on what action to take in this situation. Here is Rakapa Ngawai (rakapa nga-why) with her sons Eru and William, whose moko kauae I have referenced:

This illustration was made by Joseph Merrett in 1852.

Finally, though it is practically impossible to spot unless you zoom in REAAALLLLY close... I shall mention Tangata Whenua's necklace. It is made of pounamu (poe-nah-moo)- a type of jade only present in New Zealand's South Island, on the west coast. Tradtionally, necklaces (and other jewellery, though necklaces are most commonly known) made of carved pounamu were family heirlooms passed down from generation to generation. They come in a variety of general shapes, each with their own symbolism. For Māra, I've decided on a Hei Matau (hey mah-toe) (fish hook) shaped pounamu necklace. It is said to grant good luck, strength, and safe travel. It also draws from the traditional tale that New Zealand's North Island was a huge fish raised from the ocean when Māui (yes, just like in Moana) caught it on his fish hook- which is said to be made from his grandmother's jawbone. The ocean, in addition, is deeply important in both Māori and pākehā (paah-keh-haah- a word initially intended to denote European New Zealanders by Māori, but which can generally refer to non-Māori New Zealanders) cultural traditions. As such, fish hooks were quite important back in the day, to the point that people would always keep one on their being. Upon European contact, this constant wearing of fish hooks was taken as a sort of ornament- and gradually it evolved to be such. I imagine Tangata Whenua has only gotten her pounamu Hei Matau in recent years upon this illustration, replacing her fish hook tool. When New Zealand reaches adulthood, Tangata Whenua will pass this necklace down to her.

Here are some different styles of pounamu Hei Matau- the latter two incorportating two other styles as well. Tangata Whenua's necklace is most similar to the curved design, though they're not identical.

So that's my long ass explanation finished! If you read this far, reblog/comment with a cookie so I can be surprised people listen to me speak!!

Edit: I forgot to talk about Tangata Whenua's inordinately long hair!!! Here's the gist (from Day 3's post):

In Māori culture, the head (and thus hair) is considered very tapu (sacred). Long hair often indicates high status. In fact, in traditional Māori culture, one's hair may only be attended to by one of more mana (generally refers to reputation/status/legacy- doesn't have a close English concept unfortunately, but for now think of it like rank or status). As the personification of the Māori culture, Tangata Whenua was probably viewed as quite an important atua (god, sometimes translated as spirit), meaning no mortal could have more mana than her. As a result, unless any other atua decide to stop by for a chat, there is no one who can style her hair, or cut it. (I imagine she still brushed it, at least because unkempt hair was a sign of mourning.)

Apologies for any confusion that may have caused!!

#hws new zealand #hws england #hhw day 1 #prompt: heirlooms #period typical racism cw #long ass rambles #historical hetalia #hetalia fanart

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