#I think it's important to be able to write the things you don't like

[httpiastri]

NSFW alphabet – op81

author's note: hello again, rushed to finish this after quali today. mclaren second row lockout heck yes !!! anyways idk what i think about this one, first time posting something abt oscar in many months?? hope u enjoy tho :)

nsfw content below !! minors dni !!!

a – aftercare (what he is like after sex)

oscar is the biggest sweetheart after sex (when isn't he, though?). so so so gentle and caring for your every need. he'll be forcing you to drink some water, making sure you're cleaned up properly, helping you out with soothing lotions if your skin is sore.

lots of lots of kisses! forehead, nose, cheek, temple kisses, and especially little pecks on your lips. he loves having you rest on his chest after it all, fingers brushing along your skin or tangling in your hair. and there will be so many praises, "you did so well" and "you felt so good" and "you look gorgeous right now, did you know?"…

b – body part (his favorite body part of his and also his partner's body)

oscar has a thing for collarbones. they're like a magnet to his lips; his lips are automatically drawn to them. he loves to brush his thumb along them, seeing you shiver when he places fleeting kisses on top of them, and most importantly leaving little lovebites for only the two of you to see and know about. oscar is also in love with your breasts, no matter how big or small they are.

can't believe i almost forgot to write your eyes… i will get back to this later but your eyes are definitely one of his favorite things about you. watching you blink up at him innocently, watching your eyes flutter closed, watching them roll to the back of your head… oh he's smitten.

on his own body, he really likes his thighs. if he got to choose, he would have you sitting on his lap at all times. 24/7, no matter the occasion. the sight of you getting off just by riding his thigh is one of his absolute favorites, he loves flexing his muscles under you and guiding your hips down onto him.

c – cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

since he's a fan of your boobs (well, everything in the chest area, to be fair), he loves to pull out and spill his load over your breasts. he won't do it every time, but he savors the chances he gets. totally has a few pics of you with his cum all over your chest, dripping along your collarbones, saved for the moments when he misses you the most.

d – dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of his)

maybe not a dirty secret per se, but oscar has a little submissive streak... he sure does love begging a little, pouting and whining to get what he wants. and i mean, who could say no to these eyes looking up at you?

e – experience (how experienced is he? does he know what he's doing?)

well oscar went to school for longer than a lot of other racing drivers, and boarding school for that matter, so i think he's been able to get quite a bit of experience. he knows a lot, but it's more important to him to get to know you and what you like. his prior experience doesn't matter as much as the experience he gains together with you.

f – favorite position (this goes without saying)

oscar thinks you're the most gorgeous thing ever so you bet he doesn't want to spend even a second not getting to look into your pretty eyes. anything where he can watch your face contort or relax, and your eyes squeeze shut or blink up at him, makes him so weak. he loves a classic missionary, especially if he gets to hike one of your legs over his hip and especially if you put a pillow under your lower back because he knows you love it. and when you're enjoying himself, he enjoys himself, too.

seeing you ride him makes him a little crazy though, but don't expect him to keep his eye contact with you during it; his eyes will be firmly glued onto your boobs as they bounce up and down, he can't help it.

g – goofy (is he more serious in the moment? is he humorous? etc.)

oscar is a soft giggler during sex. he isn't overly serious but not overly humorous either, just a good mix. he's low laughs when you're whining for him, playful coos as reactions to your impatience, and a lot of "baby, let's not get ahead of ourselves, okay?" with teasing smiles. he's just not scared of a little humor because sex doesn't have to be so strict to him; it's just a cozy time you spend together and he wants you to be as comfortable and relaxed as you can.

h – hair (how well groomed is he? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he's no naked rat, but he likes to keep things neat. a bit trimmed, not super short but also not long. though i also feel like he definitely adjusts to your likes and what you find attractive.

i – intimacy (how is he during the moment? the romantic aspect)

sex isn't just fucking to him; sex is lovemaking. he loves to be romantic with it. celebrating birthdays or anniversaries in your bedroom with little candles everywhere to set the mood, rose petals in a heart on the bed, with a cozy bubble bath after. and even when it's not a big occasion, he's very soft and romantic. he has a few playlists he loves to put on, he knows exactly what to say to get you in the mood and where to press his lips to draw out your oh so sweet sounds. oscar is all gentle touches and soft glances.

j – jack off (masturbation headcanon)

that one time when you accidentally walked in on him jacking off because you came home early from work/school, he was so extremely flustered – but he also found it very arousing. when you asked him if you could help him out, he couldn't help his hasty nods and the way his heart skipped a few beats in his chest. watching you settle on his lap, your hands starting where his had left off, fingers brushing up and down along him teasingly... from that day, he replays the image of you giving him a handjob in his mind whenever he does it himself, and he loves to get your help whenever he doesn't have a lot of time but needs to get off before a race etc.

k – kink (one or more of his kinks)

marking. 100%. he'll be lowkey and casual with it, not really saying much about it, but after a while you come to the realization that he leaves quite a lot more lovebites than anyone you've been with before. the inside of your thighs, your hips, your ribs... but especially your chest area. they won't usually be where anyone can see, because he likes to keep your sex life private, but there have been occasions when he's been a bit extra riled up (or jealous) and he just couldn't back from leaving trails of hickeys down your neck. he just adores the thought of you having a physical reminder of who you belong to, even if they fade after a while.

l – location (favorite places to do the do)

your bedroom is the #1 favorite, but he's okay with other places too. he especially likes your bathtub, especially when the lights are dimmed and you've got some pretty candles spread out in the room (and downed a few glasses of wine possibly).

m – motivation (what turns him on, gets him going)

oscar loves lingerie. if you wore any lingerie, he would be turned on instantly. he just can't help it. i also feel like he's the type to just get turned on from mundane, domestic things. like, seeing you cooking? watching you do your nighttime routine? it's a reminder him that you're there, you're real, and you're his. there's nothing hotter than that.

during the actual lovemaking, he gets a little crazy whenever you say his name. especially when you're about to come and his name slips from your lips in the form of a breathless whimper and he can feel your insides contract around him. it could make him come instantly.

n – no (something he wouldn't do, turn-offs)

nothing where there's even the slightest chance that you'll injure yourself. nuh uh. he also dislikes things where you won't be able to easily quit if anything were to happen, like bonding. the idea of you being tied up when the fire alarm goes off or you get a panic attack makes his skin crawl, it's his worst nightmare.

o – oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

i don't think he has anything against receiving it, but it won't happen unless you initiate it. he's very certain about not pressuring you in that way; he knows it's not always your favorite thing to do and he respects that.

i see him as someone who loves to give it, though. especially if he can take his time with you, rile you up with soft kisses and gentle caresses of your skin.

p – pace (is he fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

oh i totally see oscar as more slow and sensual. as we've covered already, sex is lovemaking to him, and he's in no rush. he wants to enjoy every second of it, and make sure you do too. foreplay can last for an eternity with him because he loves preparing you for what's to come.

q – quickie (his opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he'd rather take his time with you and do it properly. if he really needs to blow off some steam, he'd rather just jack off or have you help him out if you don't have any time. if you're going to have sex, he wants to not be in any rush, and he wants to have time to properly take care of you after.

r – risk (is he game to experiment? does he take risks? etc.)

he's definitely open to experiment. he might want to try more things than he's willing to admit; even though he's fully comfortable with you by now, something still makes him a bit nervous about talking to you about it. he wants to find a 'good opportunity' to bring the idea up, but it might take him some courage to do it. he'll be very gentle, shy eyes blinking at you, voice soft… "only if you're okay with it, of course!" and "you really have to tell me if you don't want to. you have to promise me", maybe even making you pinky promise that you indeed do want to try the thing.

he'd be over the moon if you insinuated it, though. anything you're up for, he's automatically up for, too.

s – stamina (how many rounds can he go for? how long does he last?)

i think his stamina is quite good. when i say that he loves taking his time with you, i mean it in that way, too; he can go on for hours. if he needs to take a break, then he'll start focusing on you and making you feel good instead. neither of you will ever get tired, he just keeps on going until he's satisfied.

t – toys (does he own toys? does he use them? on a partner or himself?)

i wouldn't say he's the biggest fan of them, but he doesn't have anything against them, either. he's much happier if he gets to be the person to make you feel so good. though, the thought of you using your toys on yourself when he's not around really gets him going, and if anything, he's okay with you using them on yourself even when you're together. (fic abt osc watching you use your vibrator hereee)

u – unfair (how much he likes to tease)

not as much as some other people (*cough cough* his teammate *cough cough*) but he does enjoy it. he really likes teasing fingers dragging up and down your ribs, fleeting kisses all over your skin, brushing your hair away from your face as you're waiting for him to do something.

he does it in a gentle and sweet way that should be interpreted as just cute but it makes you furious sometimes? because he can be so slow it's infuriating and you want him to just get on with it already. he'll be pretending to think things through or fiddle with a belt, and you'll just go crazy because he should be touching you but he's just finding a bunch of excuses to keep you on your toes. he loves to see you squirming and whining beneath him, holding your hands away easily with a 'tsk' when you try to release some of your tension yourself since he's so goddamn slow. (blurb ish on this topic hereeee)

v – volume (how loud he is, what sounds he makes, etc.)

a lot of heavy breathing. i see him as a groaner, but he's not overly loud with it. he lovesss to talk you through it, though. "are you ready? is this okay? tell me if i need to pause. that feels so good, you're doing so good."

w – wild card (a random headcanon)

oscar LOVES praising you. it just happens naturally because he thinks you're doing so well and he loves you so much, he must tell you. "that's perfect, love. i love it when you do that. god, you feel so good. look at you, taking me so well. and looking so beautiful while doing it? there's no one as good as you..."

x – x-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

just a bit longer than average but it's the thickness that makes him stand out. even after being together for a long while, it takes you a good amount of foreplay to stretch out for him, and it still feels like he's splitting you open once he finally slips fully into you.

y – yearning (how high is his sex drive?)

nothing too special i'd say, he loves a good few rounds but he enjoys a sweet, romantic night of another kind just as much.

z – zzz (how quickly he falls asleep afterward)

a sleepy boy in general but most of the time, he gets a little energy boost out of sex instead. he will be the last to fall asleep pretty much every time, which is also because he just wants to enjoy the moment for as long as he can before eventually falling asleep. he adores having you in his arms after doing his aftercare routines, drawing little shapes into your skin as you start to fall asleep. once asleep, though, he sleeps so well & heavy. it'll take three alarms and you bribing him with kisses for him to actually wake up before 1pm.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Adrien Agreste and Why Motivation Matters

One of the most important things you can gift a character is a motivation that correlates to their intended role in the story. It's a big part of how they truly come alive. And if they have a motivation that doesn't correlate to their role? That can make them come across as a total ass!

A few days ago I got an ask about Lila. I ended my response with this:

I'm totally fine with complex, master-manipulator Lila, it's just hard to figure out the best way to make her work when we don't know anything about her backstory or motivation.

This got me thinking about motivation in general and how much it plays into the show's poor writing. I talked about Lila above, but I wanted to point out how much it's responsible for Adrien's issues, too.

Motivations are one of the main ways you create strong characters. You come up with the thing they want and then keep that in mind whenever you're writing them. Motivations can be very simple and straight forward (I want to get home) or extremely complex and nuanced (a person wanting to create a new government with a very detailed idea of what that means). A character can even have multiple motivations!

Unfortunately, all motivation are not created equal. There is such a thing as a bad motivation and I'm not talking ethics or morality here. I'm talking about picking motivations that match the character's intended role. For example, Gabriel's motivation is fine! It perfectly suits a villain. On the other hand, Adrien's motivation sucks because it makes him into a terrible hero.

Adrien's motivation as given in the show seems to be this: win the heart of my Lady. Later on, that motivation changes to: date Marinette and be the best boyfriend possible. And that's it. He has no other overarching motivations. Individual episodes might give him a one-off motivation to jazz things up for a bit, but generally speaking, romance is all he cares about. It's why we get baffling moments like this one from Dark Cupid:

Cat Noir: Falling for me already, my lady? (pulls Ladybug down next to him) I need to talk to you. Ladybug: It’s gotta wait. Dark Cupi- Cat Noir: (hushes her) I swore to myself that I'd tell you as soon as I saw you. Ladybug, I-I... Look out! (Cat Noir spins around to shield Ladybug, and is struck by one of Dark Cupid's arrows.)

Or this one from Oblivio:

Nadja:(from a helicopter) Looks like Ladybug and Cat Noir are struggling today. (Ladybug is rapidly spinning her yo-yo to deflect Oblivio's blasts while Cat Noir sits down casually.) Ladybug: And stop calling us a couple!

These are just two out of many examples I can pull from, but they highlight a reoccurring issue: Adrien often doesn't take akumas seriously. He's been shown to happily prioritize flirting over fighting and, as a result, he's put himself, his Lady love, and all of Paris in danger.

It also gives us things like Kuro Neko and Kwami's Choice. Episodes where he quit without any concern for protecting his loved ones or even just protecting the freedom that comes with being Chat Noir, things that he only really cares about in the realms of fanfic. As far as the show is concerned, Adrien doesn't care about his loved ones or his freedom. His only constant driving force is his current crush.

Don't get me wrong, he's going to react if he sees Nino in danger or if his father bans him from going to a party! But in terms of what generally guides Adrien's actions? His father, Nathalie, Nino, Chloe, and Alya are out of sight, out of mind. And being able to leave the house? Well, who cares about that? He'll happily sacrifice freedom for a date. Outside of Origins, I think we only ever see him sneak out or otherwise break the rules so he can have a date.

You'll note that Marinette doesn't really have this problem*. While dating Adrien is a big motivation for her, she has a second motivation: protecting Paris. Sometimes those motivations clash, leading her to make poor choices, but that story never treats this as a good thing the way it does Chat Noir's endless flirting. Instead, Marinette's crush is treated as a character flaw or an interesting source of conflict like Volpina threatening to kill Adrien, making Ladybug having to chose between her two main motivations: love and duty.

This is why I've had several posts where I offhandedly mentioned Adrien needing a second motivation. It's also why I've mentioned that Gabriel should have been claiming that akumas were the main reason that Adrien was getting locked up because that's a really simple way to give Adrien personal stakes in the fight. Are those stakes selfish? Sure, but that's okay because it's a selfish motivation that doesn't go against being a hero. If Marinette was only being Ladybug for the sake of her parents, her motivation would be selfish, but still suited to a hero because it doesn't stop her from being heroic. It actually drives her to be heroic. As written, Adrien's motivations do the opposite. Whenever Ladybug or Marinette are seemingly safe, he will do very unheroic things because romance is his only main motivation and that's a problem. To make him work in his intended role, he needs to match Marinette and have (or discover) a motivation that suits a hero.

*To be extra clear and hopefully save myself a salty ask or two, I'm NOT saying that Marinette never does questionable things in the name of romance, she absolutely does. I'm saying that it's extremely rare for her romantic motivation to get in the way of keeping Paris safe because keeping Paris safe is her second motivation and it overrides the romantic one most of the time. Once an akuma is on the loose, she's usually all business. It's one of the reasons Passion (the episode where Nathalie becomes Safari) is so awkward. They did a full role reversal for Marinette and Adrien and it really doesn't work on Marinette's end because it feels out of character for Marinette to ignore the akuma threat in favor of flirting. She never did that for Adrien or Luka or even Catwalker. The worse we ever saw was a crush distracting her from making the right call, but even then, she was always at least trying to protect Paris. Compare Desperada (Viperion's debuted) to Passion and you'll see what I mean.

[lovemyromance]

You know that scene in the Jim Carey grinch when he yells “I’m an Idiot” into the cave and the echo says “You’re an idiot!” back at him instead? I feel like that is the glenriel echo chamber in a nutshell. THAT is the real take away from the fated mates quiz that was posted today.

I think the issue in this fandom is that people tend to take things very, very personally. Ive seen it on all sides, but it's especially prevalent when we take a look at some of these Gwynriel theories. Gwyn became a self insert character for many because she's just vague and secondary enough that she has no real flaws and is not very complex or fleshed out. She does a few brave things and is generally kind and pretty - and people just latched on.

Any idea that Gwyn isn't a main character, any mention of the lightsinger theory, any whisper even that Gwynriel isn't backed by evidence from the books - that is something they are going to take very personally. Because even if objectively, all those things are true, these people are using Gwyn as a self insert. So they are hearing people say:

"Gwyn is not an MC" = "you're not a main character"

"Gwyn could be a lightsinger" = You're a cruel evil lightsinger"

"Gwyn and Azriel aren't mates" = "you're not gonna end up with azriel"

And that doesn't seem like something they want to hear. So they lash out, go crazy with their crack theories even more than before. They take it as a personal insult when it is just something that is objectively true. They accuse everyone of being anti Gwyn when they dont support Gwynriel when they are really two separate things.

I'm sure they'll find some way to spin this fated mates quiz anyways. Or more likely, the Eluciens will spin it because Lucien was an option and try to push the Elucien agenda, which the Gwynriels will hop on board for just to say "ofc SJM wouldn't spoil Gwynriel in a quiz 🙄"

That's what happens when you form a conclusion and then read the books to zero in on any scrap of text you can twist to fit that conclusion. When you read backwards, you form backwards opinions 🤷🏻‍♀️

People have got to understand that being anti a ship doesn't mean they hate that character. All I see Eluciens & Gwynriels do is accuse people of hating Lucien and Gwyn. Which is crazy. Nobody hates them, im pretty sure feelings towards these characters have only soured due to the insanity of the fandom, not the books or characters themselves.

And I've been very clear about this. For example, Lucien was actually my favorite character in ACOTAR. But when SJM stopped writing him, I stopped liking him as much. When Lucien and Elain were declared mates in ACOMAF - I was actually in support. It was only in ACOWAR did I see how unsuited they were for each other that I realized I don't think this ship is endgame. I reached that conclusion without hating Lucien or Elain - imagine that?

Furthermore, I actually got Lucien in that fated mates quiz. And I was not surprised nor was I disappointed by the answer. It tracks. If I were to go for a man, it would definitely be someone like Lucien. Even my current boyfriend has the same kind of traits as Lucien (dry wit, snarky, but able to switch to polite and charming at the drop of a hat).

But that's the important distinction. I, personally, would go for a man like Lucien. But I am not Elain.

And I know that. I am able to objectively read these books and form accurate conclusions because I don't let my personal preferences cloud my judgement of what is on the actual page.

I might personally prefer a man like Lucien, but Elain clearly does not. She wants nothing to do with him.

And if people were able to stop with the self-inserts and obsessions over fictional men, they would be able to read these books with a clear mind. The way they were meant to be read.

[jayden-killer]

Ayo, hiii! Is it okay to ask angst?

Here's an idea: reader has a sensory disorder (maybe autism), but doesn't know about it (they weren't diagnosed somehow for all these years) and it prevents her from building strong friendships/relationships since people think of them as weird or whatever. But it's not a bother until Miguel shows up. We all know he likes this intense eye contact when speaking to someone but READER CAN'T LOOK IN THE EYE WHEN THEY SPEAK TO SOMEONE. So Miguel might feel that he is disrespected or they don't listen to him (which isn't true, they listen very carefully).

So conflict happens and fluff in the end (make up... make out)? Like reader gets diagnosed after because LYLA notices pattern in reader's behaviour and encourages Miguel to get reader to see a doctor.

I hope I write clear, because English is not my first language.

Thank you, byee💥

Woo-oh! Thanks for requesting, anon. This is some interesting idea here. I tried my best, making some reseraches about sensory disorder and its symptoms; I hope I didn't disappoint you and won't be disrespectful :((

KISS ME BETTER.

Miguel O'Hara × General neutral reader.

warnings: angst, conflicts between the two protagonists, low self-esteem, use of Y/N.

I always thought I was strange. And I always thought that this weirdness would cause me discomfort, like friendships. Seeing all those people of my age and not being able to create unbreakable bonds...I envied them. They made things seem so much simpler than they thought, yet how could I never? This was not even possible when my life changed, taking on my responsibilities as Spider-man. Even in the Spider-society everyone seemed so sociable, available. Perhaps only in appearance.

Not even there was easy to make a friend, let alone find a lover. Great story.

I should have lived with this weirdness for life.

~~~

I can’t face him.

I can’t do it.

I can’t do it.

I can’t do it.

I can’t do it.

That’s what resonates in an endless loop in my head.

It’s not the first time. Every time that happens to me I have a heart that feels like it’s about to escape the rib cage, tense muscles, excessive sweating. It’s not normal to feel so uncomfortable when Miguel tries to talk to me. Every time. Time.

One thing I noticed in the leader of the Spider-society is wanting to maintain eye contact. An intense eye contact.

I just can’t look him in the eye; it creates an inexplicable discomfort. Today Miguel seems particularly whipped (as if he were not always, but who knows...), and my ears are wide open, listening precisely to what he says about the next mission, And how many teams we should split up to make the mission a success.

"Are you listening to me?"

"Of course I do..." I stutter, panicking. I’m afraid it might burst like a volcano. " Then why does it seem that I am talking to a wall rather than a person?" He heard a snort from Miguel. "I don’t have your attention on me. Listen to what I’m saying, Y/N, it’s extremely important".

"I’m listening to you, Miguel..."

"I don’t understand if it’s a joke or not." the leader replied with irritation "because I have everyone’s eyes on me, but not yours! And you know such behavior..."

"So how?" I snapped in self-defense, feeling myself called into question.

"It is disrespectful! And rude!" At that his accusation my eyes finally moved to see his. His face was tense, showing me how angry he was feeling at the time. But it wasn’t my intention.

I never do it on purpose.

Why can’t I be normal like the others?

Why can’t I even face him like everyone else?

Why do I look like such a disaster?

Miguel breathed a deep breath, pinching his nose trying to find his lost calm. I was already looking down. And our conversation ended badly.

The misunderstandings never end.

~~~

"I’m sorry, Miguel."

"Of course you’re sorry!"

"I didn’t want to be rude, I would never, especially to you, because I know you’re the lead-"

"THEN WHY DOES IT SEEM YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME?!"

"BECAUSE THERE'S SOMETHING OFF ABOUT ME! ALL RIGHT?"

Just one sentence.

One sentence from me to silence Miguel and his thoughts. A single sentence to make the tears begin to scratch my face, warm tears that I had kept inside and suppressed for who knows how long, with no intention of releasing them. Sobbing silently in front of the person I cared about the most was another kind of pain. Miguel had no qualms at the time as he approached me with caution, as if I were a helpless little animal, circling me with his mighty arms.

Gently.

A delicacy that seemed extraneous to me because I had always seen him in action, always brutal with his enemies, and to feel me caress the head with so much sweetness seemed strange to me.

"I didn’t mean to yell at you…" These were the words that left my lips, trying with all of myself to look at him, once again, in the eyes, but a greater strength, something contrasting prevented me from doing it altogether. I would never, ever understand why.

"I really wasn’t disrespecting you because by now you should know me well enough to know...and-and-maybe."

Miguel’s hands took me with firmness, but kindness, holding my cheeks, making our lips meet in a sweet and meaningful kiss. My cheeks began to blush.

I could smell Miguel’s strong smell on me, musk and vanilla combined, and how he pushed his lips to mine; he seemed to have no intention of ending that moment.

When our kiss came to an end, Miguel made sure to look at me with his cheeks flushed and his breathing laboured while my gaze wavered.

"LYLA..."

"LYLA..?" I raised an eyebrow. "We just kissed for what seems like an eternity, and the first thing you say... is LYLA?"

Miguel sighed. "No, I..." He rubbed his chin with need, then said, "LYLA has...noticed that you have unusual behaviour. Not that you’re weird, but..."

Just then, Miguel’s AI, Lyla, appeared on his shoulder, like a fake angel, smiling upwards. "Did you call me?"

"LYLA, please..." Miguel snorted, closing his eyes and taking another deep breath. When I saw that scene, I smiled.

"Okay, okay..." answered the AI, picketing Miguel’s cheek, too big for her hands. She then turned her gaze upon me, quickly dissolving from his shoulder and then appearing before my face. " Y/N, what Miguel wants to say to you, but he can’t say out loud because he’s afraid..."

"Don’t start this again..." Miguel’s voice sounded threatening, even though LYLA chuckled, "... is that I recently noticed patterns in your person. Something that makes me think you have a sensory disorder..."

Oh.

Oh, right. of course.

Suddenly, all pieces of the puzzle seemed to connect with each other. It was clear. The woman listed some of the things she had noticed over the months: my wanting to avoid food for the appearance or smell, the agitation in looking even for a moment in the eyes a person, little coordination, hypersensitive to some situations... This was a real problem for me, believing that I was a mistake modelled to take the form of a person, but LYLA wasn’t actually wrong. And maybe...

"I... I wish someone could help you get better." Miguel’s voice brought me back to reality.

"I want you to finally feel good about yourself. I want…I want to be there for you. I want to help you too."

And even though I kept avoiding his gaze, playing with my fingers, Miguel’s tone seemed sweet, sensitive to my situation. And I never would have said it, but then we started getting closer together, spending days, and the memories were etched in my mind forever. He encouraged me in my sessions with a specialist, trying to be present to most of them, waiting outside the waiting room patiently; at the end of each visit he asked me if he could take my hand, which I agreed, wondering how it went and other details. The results were noticed, even if by a little, they were noticed.

And Miguel…never abandoned me.

[ryuichirou]

what kinda underwear do you think the male cast would wear?? i like to think Jade would go without some days, so improper!! OTL Floyd with the colorful patterns, whether he actually wears them tho is a 60/40. i can see him in those cliche heart boxers very, very easily. Do you think any of the cast would keep their lovers' underwear, like a souvenir? I could see Lilia doing it. 1/3 (the rest is just horny posting for a fish)

2/3 (this is *not* an art request just me being down bad for a semi-crazy assfish) I would die to see jade leech in lingerie OTL i cant think of any scenarios where he'd wear it, but god is it a beautiful mental image. Considering his take on clothing (being a mer+weird asf) I don't think he'd have any actual hangups about it, but he still wouldn't do it under normal circumstances. i think part of the appeal for me, is that you wouldnt expect a guy like him (big, top, JADE) to wear sumn like it

3/3 in conclusion  they took away my license because of how  fast i was undressing him

Hi Anon!

This is such a great theme for hcs, and I am very sorry that it took so long, but please understand: this is a very complicated subject, I just had to do research before writing it. Well, in actuality I was just googling all kinds of underwear over and over again until the picture in my head for every single boy looked right lol We’ll get to hcs shortly, but first I’ll reply to the other things you’ve said!

Btw, this ask is from MARCH, that’s how far behind I am in replying to those.

Totally agree about Lilia stealing his lover’s undies as a souvenir. This is his trophy, and he is very proud of them. He should have a display in his room…

Floyd also has his stealing undies moments. Some of the boys he sleeps with could be smitten with him enough to try to gift him their underwear, and Floyd would go “??? Why the fuck do I need these”. But sometimes? He just steals them lol He totally stole a couple of Riddle’s undies. He doesn’t really store them well though, so they’re just lying around his and Jade’s room…

Rook. Rook would also take trophies. And he would take such good care of them it’s insane. Now this is someone who would have a display somewhere… somewhere where no one would be able to see it unless he wants them to…

I also think Ortho would do it one time just because he wanted to play out the trope of having someone else’s panties in his room, oops! He’s a weird boy.

Can’t say much about Jade in lingerie, but it really would look good, not gonna lie….

Riddle – god I want him to have cute ones with a strawberry print, but realistically he is probably wearing just some plain tighty whities…. unless they have a pretty embroidered “R” on it, which is somehow even worse. I love him so much. Wait, would he be the one to wear undies with the weekdays written on them?

Ace – just some boxer briefs, nothing crazy; he used to have very colourful ones when he was younger, with fun prints and all, but nowadays he tries to be a bit more stylish and mature about it, so a lot of times he goes for dark-red/red/black ones.

Deuce – pretty neutral, but he does have a “lucky” pair of trunks that he always wears when he has something important going on that day… He also has a pair of very good seamless running underwear (deep blue with some light blue patterns), and he kind of cherishes them because it’s an expensive gift. Just wear them and run, Deuce…

Trey – he prefers boxers, the ones that are basically just shorts and aren’t tight. They also look pretty plain, but he has some with the tartan print. Usually green or red… He would look like a Men’s Health model if he wore something less loose and more stylish, but he loves his stupid tartan boxers!

Cater – boxer briefs, but the “leg” part is somewhat shorter; he has a variety of different ones, but it’s almost always some variation of grey and orange. He buys the ones that seem cool to him, even the sillier ones are on the cooler side; he is very happy that his sisters don’t have power over what kind of underwear he wears… he thinks about it every time he looks in the mirror after taking a shower.

Leona – probably something high-end and luxury, but he also doesn’t wear them all the time. He wears something short, slick and sporty when he does anything sport-related and needs support for his balls, but other than that – nah, putting on underwear is just another annoying unnecessary extra thing to do.

Ruggie – he bought the cheapest ones available in bulk when he was like 13, and he still wears them (they were a little big for him when he first got them). His grandma said that it has to be cotton, but other than that – it doesn’t matter, and Ruggie believes it wholeheartedly. So I guess some neutral grey briefs? Nothing too fancy.

Jack – oh this boy. He doesn’t like underwear that doesn’t give him good support, so all of his options fit pretty close to his body. I guess his signature ones would be briefs in which one leg is just plain black, and the other leg has a print of half of the wolf face… what, you think it’s cringe? At least it’s not the ones where the wolf’s face is in the crotch area… Jack actually thinks those are cringe too – he got a pair of those from Ace, Deuce and Epel for his birthday (google wolf underwear)

Azul – Calvin Klein and Hugo Boss are his best friends. Very… gentlemanly. He always picks the ones that would make him feel like a successful young man. They’re not too short, but a little shorter than regular boxer briefs, and always very tight. To some maybe even uncomfortably tight, but Azul doesn’t mind it at all for some reason. He has exactly 10 pairs of grey and purple ones, exactly 10 pairs of black and purple ones and a couple of white ones.

Floyd – a big collection, kind of like with his shoes and socks. He hates plain ones, but some of his undies aren’t obnoxious – he has a couple of pretty stylish and bright ones that aren’t too crazy. But yeah, a lot of them are pretty obnoxious and bright lol He loves loose boxers, but also has some tighter ones too.

Jade – yeah he’d go commando lol But not all the time. His choice of underwear is… eclectic. Of course, he has some plain ones (a couple of those are similar to Azul’s but in a different colour and size), but also? He has some surprisingly silly ones. Of course with mushrooms and stuff, or something that too cursed even for Floyd to wear. It just tickles Jade when he has a secret…

Kalim – luxury underwear! Mostly white + yellow/golden/orange ones, but he has some black ones as well. Super high quality, super special design, super cool-looking actually. And Kalim doesn’t even know that his underwear is different from the rest of the guys, but if he ever was to try on some other type of underwear, he would immediately feel discomfort and say that it doesn’t feel right against his skin. Too rough…

Jamil – his is also pretty high quality; even though his family serves the Asims, I feel like this is exactly why Jamil can afford a good pair of underwear. It’s not even remotely near the price tag of Kalim’s though, god forbid, no one should allow to wear underwear this expensive..! Anyways, since Jamil likes to go sleeveless, he probably prefers underwear that doesn’t cover his thighs at all, so just some regular tight briefs. It’s mostly black+deep red, his favourite colour combo.

Vil – there he is, the underwear guru. He has all kinds of underwear and sometimes changes it multiple times per day depending on his activity: he wears seamless short briefs for yoga so it’s not visible through his leggings, but still gives him support, he wears longer boxer briefs for jogging so his thighs don’t rub against each other too much, he wears some other type for flying… his collection is expensive, high quality and very well organised… What was that? A thong? Of course he wears a thong sometimes, it looks hot. And lingerie too, when it’s appropriate. Come on now.

Rook – there he is, the man who used to wear underwear with holes in it and didn’t even care. Point at him, laugh at him, and then say thank you to Vil Schoenheit who took one look at this creature and said “I can fix him”. Anyways, nowadays Rook wears a pair of seamless boxer briefs that hug his body tightly but don't feel suffocating; he owns a bunch of these in different colours. He also owns a jockstrap, and finds it kind of functional, but it makes his butt too prominent, so he doesn't wear it. It’s for special occasions only...

Epel – he fought his mum for the right to buy himself some new cool underwear before coming to NRC (having colourful undies your mom bought you when you were 12 SUCKS!), but he didn’t even get to wear them much because Vil saw them and gave him a lecture about how this is the worst type of underwear he could wear (pure polyester, are you serious??), and that Epel doesn’t care about the well-being of his down-there at all. Long story short, Vil got him some red+purple boxer briefs for the regular wear (not too tight, very comfy!) + a couple of  black pairs for magift (longer ones?? Epel didn’t even know it existed). Epel was actually worried that he would get some stupid girly underwear, but wow these are… kind of nice. But he would never admit that the ones Vil got are much better!!

Idia – he usually wears the grey ones with triangles that STYX issues for its personnel. They are pretty comfy, and you can just grab a box and boom – you don’t have to think about your underwear ever again, EASY. But also Idia has some kind of childish loose boxers… with his favourite characters, of course. This isn’t just underwear, it’s also merch. Perfect for rewatching 300 episodes of your favourite anime.

Ortho – how much he wishes he could wear underwear…! But if we’re talking about real!Ortho, I think he would also like good ol’ regular loose boxers. But overall his underwear collection is less childish than Idia’s, at least because he has some Calvin Kleines.  And yes, of course it’s black and neon blue. He doesn’t really like the STYX ones because they make him sad, but he wears those from time to time because he wants to match with Idia.

Lilia – the moment he discovered funky underwear he was never the same. It’s the same thing he does with socks: he buys everything that seems fun, even if it ends up not being his size: he just gifts it away to younglings, so it’s all good! I think every Diasomnia boy has at least one pair of underwear that doesn’t match his style at all, because it was Lilia’s gift… anyways, Lilia either wears black ones with bright patterns (black + neon green+pink!), or something completely obnoxious. Nowadays he’s also thinking whether he could pull off something cute+sexy…

Silver – he wears whatever and doesn’t think about it twice, as long as it’s clean and has no holes in it. The majority of his underwear are pretty boring regular boxer briefs + just regular boxers that aren’t as tight. He also has one silly pair with blue and pink birdies… a gift from father, of course. He always smiles when he wears them.

Sebek – his default is black+green briefs; his thighs are getting too powerful, so he doesn’t like shorts-type underwear these days. But he does wear one lengthier pair – and it’s special equestrian underwear that has padding on the crotch. Sometimes the boy just wants some extra protection against rubbing okay… it’s not as much of a problem for the rest of the equestrian club boys for some reason.

Malleus – it’s clearly custom-made just for him: it’s black, made of high quality special type of silk + has beautiful lacing. Honestly, Malleus panties are a piece of art. I guess it’s like traditional Briar Valley type of design, but super extra fancy; he is the future King, after all. It’s hard to say if it’s comfy or not, but it looks quite dramatic. Malleus also has some underwear that is lengthier, almost like leggings. 

Bonus round!:

Crowley – doesn’t wear anything. Don’t tell anyone.

Crewel – a big variety, a lot of bold patterns, but his favourite pair is a part of black trunks with a white zebra print. Shocking, I know. He has some pretty sexy ones though, maybe even a thong.

Trein – granpa undies… grandpa undies.

Vargas – unfortunately, probably a jockstrap.

Sam – well wouldn’t you want to know? :)

Che’nya – he almost never wears underwear. And he flashes people. He is a very, very bad cat. He only wears underwear when he knows his pants are going to slide down because he doesn’t know how to use a belt properly, and people are going to see that he is wearing boxers with cartoon hedgehogs tickling each other in a weirdly sexual manner. Bad, bad cat.

Neige – pretty plain ones! Almost all of his underwear is either white or light blue. Some of them have silly prints, almost too cute for a guy… He gets tons of very cool expensive underwear for free as promo, but he donates the majority of them without even unpacking it. Thank you for your kindness, but people need undies more than Neige <3

Rollo – he is similar to Riddle, but I also think he would be that one kid who wears some priestly old-timey looking cotton shorts, because these are more traditional, and traditions are to be cherished. One could think that this is a part of his school’s uniform, but nah, Rollo is just a little weirdo… looks good on him though.

Fellow – I’m sorry, it’s probably kind of bad :( it used to be a decent pair of boxer briefs that he got when they suddenly got lucky enough with money, but now it’s well-worn and has some holes in it. It also used to be bright orange, but now it has a pale sort of peachy hue… he wants to get something new to wear, but whenever they get the money, clothes aren’t really a priority.

Gidel – his aren’t as bad because Fellow always wants Gidel to have something at least a little bit better than what he has, but Gidel’s pair of boxers is clearly too big for him. It’s pinned around his waist just so he doesn’t lose them… it has some guy’s name written on the butt part, and while Fellow finds it kind of depressing (maybe he remembers the guy he stole those from), Gidel thinks it’s pretty funny.

[altraviolet]

hiii :3 hope it is okay that im doing an ask 😰😰

I hope that you’ve been doing well this year! I love your writing so much! I have never sent you an ask before so I dont know how to write it….

This new chapter is so amazing as usual! I love your descriptions and just…everything that you write is so unique to my brain I’m unsure on how to praise it correctly.

These are my favourite bits as of now:

Rodimus grabbed his waist with unexpected speed and tried to pull him sideways. "My... hrgh, you're heavier than you look! My turn on top.”

———————

The disk data pads joke coming full circle, brilliant.

———————

his side, his flame-shaped chest. Soundwave touched Rodimus's face with his fingers. A very slow, soft touch.

Rodimus kissed his fingertips as they passed his lips. They were thin and light. Hidden in the single joint of each was a ring of blue biolights.

"Tell me someday," said Rodimus quietly.

"Affirmative." Soundwave held his fingers against Rodimus's face. Rodimus nuzzled them.

———————

Its absence pressed cold on Soundwave's plating. He leaned forward and said softly, "Preferred: true cheerfulness.

Preferred: Rodimus, happy."

Rodimus looked up at him. His eyes flashed. His field seeped out with surprise and a little pain.

Soundwave wanted nothing more than to wrap his tentacles around Rodimus, feel his sparkpulse, pulse something in return that would bring that smile back. He wondered if Rodimus had agreed to ignite the crystal for the portal only, or if he had another reason, a deeper reason-

———————

But another thing I’ve found interesting throughout the whole fic is obviously drift and rodimus’s ex-situationship i guess you could say. And this bit:

"Rodimus! Did you get-" Drift stopped short before their table. "Oh my god." He looked back and forth between Rodimus and Soundwave. "That aura." Rodimus's face fell.

He yanked his field in. Soundwave held perfectly still, uncertain what was happening. Drift gave Rodimus a faint look of horror. "Don't tell me it was with him.

"Okay. It wasn't with him," said Rodimus, a warning tone in his voice. "And since it wasn't, there's no reason to say anything about it to anyone."

—broke me omg. I was also wondering, since a few of my friends also read this, if there was a previous fic written of the grey/greying years with ratchet, rodimus and drift? I have seen you talk about it and it seems very:

😰🫣🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️😳😭❤️💔🖤❤️‍🩹.

And if there is a previous fic about it i would love to read it, but obviously i am very content with everything you have written!!!

i dont know how to end asks but i am finished! hope you are doing well :DD

Alright it's been about 5 days since Ch 46 was uploaded so hopefully anyone who was trying to avoid spoilers has gotten to read it. I've been saving this ask til now for that reason.

Thanks so much for the kind message :D It's always fun to see which parts people liked.

>The disk data pads joke coming full circle, brilliant. heheHEHE. there are quite a few circles in this fic. glad you enjoyed :D

>if there was a previous fic written of the grey/greying years with ratchet, rodimus and drift? no, no previous fic. the characters are referencing the event, just as they've referenced the Scavengers or TCs, etc etc. Dratchet isn't a pairing I'm into, so I'm unlikely to explore the gray years in a fic. But I'll never say never. Obviously there's interest in this, and I think it could be a very powerful story (although devastating for Rodimus).

Thank you again for the kind ask! Hope you are doing well, too :)

[winslowat3am]

You prob won’t see this but hi! I follow you and your beautiful wife bc of your love for black women and life tips! I wanna share a story that happened yesterday where I was harassed in a gas station by an aggressive black male security guard and get nonblack poc feedback bc I no longer feel safe around black men and just curious to what advice or thoughts you have.

Last night I walked inside a pilot gas station to use the restroom where I wore a yellow camo track suit with the hood up bc I was cold. The security told me to take my hood down even tho there was no policy where I could see and followed me to the restroom door and called me out my name (I heard him thru the door), after I finished in the restroom I went to confront him at the register he was hiding behind where we got into a heated verbal exchange , I cussed him out amd I hurt his ego evidently bc he felt the need to follow me outside to escalate it but I outtalked him and got in my car. I never took my hood down. I went back in the gas station with a girlfriend for water after informing her of what happened where he then tried to make me remove my hood again and tried to encourage the women at the registers to refuse me service bc I wouldn’t remove my hood, we got into it again. He was aggressive, approached me slamming his hand on the counter, got loud, and sensitive bc I got the best of him twice verbally and in the end I still got the water and never took my hood down; the nice white lady at the register took my money from my friend who paid for it, the black woman at the register was a m@mmy. He nitpicked my outfit and physical appearance but ppl passing thru wore hoods and had pants hanging off their asses, tummy shirts, brought dogs in the store, but was never harassed like I was. I don’t have a problem following a policy but I won’t follow a policy when it’s enforced on me but no one else. So I called the police and they told me to file a complaint with corporate and see what I can do about it so I will be calling them in the morning. Did I mention the security tried to get me banned for trespassing just bc i didn’t back down and verbally whooped him?? LOLL!!! I’ll be carrying a switchblade from now on and learning to shoot a gun real soon!

Read my tags. I'm assuming you're a bw? It doesn't take all the hoodrat buffoonery Glocktavious displayed to ask someone to remove their hood. Talk to a lawyer, they'll help you go about prosecuting Dustavious the right way. So unprofessional. I hope this isn't a late response, I don't really check Tumblr lately or read every ask but yours grabbed my attention. You did the right thing! Always stand up for yourself. You're a savage for checking his ass. Never be afraid of a man, & keep a weapon on you. 👏👏👏👏Insecure, pussy "men" pick fights with women, they think being aggressive & loud intimidates you & they never prepare for a strong retort that shuts their shit down. My completely honest & straightforward unfiltered pov: We need to address the fact that the bullying of bw is a problematic behavior that is perpetuated by bm primarily (not all, but atp it's so common it might as well be). You'd be better off opening up your dating options to men outside of your race, tbh. (Be very selective & careful when itrl dating). Non-bm build their communities & protect their women. [Redacted] That's why I don't understand why some ww leave wm, who have privilege & power, for bm, who 9/10 don't have anything to offer except dick, kids & struggle love. Even when bm manage to have success it doesn't change their crusty ass mentality. I recently learned that a bw is killed by a bm every six hours. [Redacted] Bm are the only race of men who publicly bash, degrade & bully their race of women while praising, fetishizing & worshipping non-bw. But you can't expect men who hate themselves to love or value you. I see the bs bw have to deal with daily & it saddens me. I feel like they target bw cause they think it'll make them men & acceptable in the eyes of wm, it's embarrassing. [Redacted] I can't imagine treating my baby like that. [Redacted] I'll never post or reblog a "this is a safe space for everyone" post. It's not. I don't post for them. I don't want racists/colorists in my space where bw & woc tell me that they feel safe, seen & protected. I gatekeep my blog so that you're safe expressing your feelings here. I thought it was obvious since I never acknowledge bm but it needs to be said. I 100% agree with the bw advising bw to choose higher quality men. You should watch Cynthia G & Paris Milan on YouTube & other black women who cover domestic & racial topics, it's very educational & insightful, they offer a lot of perspective & I agree with so many points they make. [Redacted] The best advice I can give you is to run & never look back. Good luck. ❤️

[petiolata]

Blegh, I hate writing things that I feel are just mediocre. Like they're not bad, not terrible, no one is going to cringe in disgust at them or anything.

But you know they're not going to be anyone's favorite. They lack a distinct flavor, a certain charm. They're not OOC, but they don't have that thrill that a really good characterization has, where you feel the characters personality strongly and their voice is just so completely them you can hear it.

It's not like it happens a whole lot; most of my fics and stories don't fall prey to this blandness. I think, once I have this fic edited, I'll go through it and look for places to strengthen character voice.

[youssefguedira]

behold, the product of yesterday's lotr au discussion (for @spacegirlsgang)

Nicolò has not spoken to him in days.

He hasn't spoken to anyone. He walks silently at Yusuf's side, hand always on his sword, eyes always on the horizon. When there are people who need it, he helps, tends wounds and lifts the younger ones onto horses and hands out food. He still does not speak, and Yusuf worries for him.

They have already lost Quynh, and Sebastien. Dizzy and Jay may well be dead by now for all they know, and Nile and Lykon… he does not really want to think about it for long. He only hopes they are alive. And now Andromache, too, is gone, and Nicolò will not speak, and Yusuf cannot help feeling very, very alone without him. It is strange: Yusuf would have thought, just a week or two ago, that he would have been glad never to see Nicolò again. Now, the thought terrifies him.

When they make camp that night, Yusuf takes his place by the fire with his sword across his lap and prepares to keep watch. Nicolò joins him, after a while, but instead of taking a seat and silently watching the horizon as Yusuf has come to expect him to, he speaks.

"You should rest," he says, voice hoarse as if – well, as if he hasn't used it in days. He carries two bowls of stew, one of which he passes to Yusuf.

"So should you," Yusuf responds. He's exhausted, but neither of them have slept much – he's not sure Nicolò has slept at all since they lost Andromache.

"I do not need to sleep like you do," Nicolò says, which almost makes Yusuf laugh.

"Bullshit," he says. "Even you can't go this long without needing to rest."

Nicolò doesn't say anything to that. Doesn't even meet Yusuf's eyes, but Yusuf can tell how tired Nicolò truly is, and suddenly he cannot bear it anymore.

"We cannot keep on like this," Yusuf says. "This is not – if we're all that's left, I cannot do this without you, Nicolò."

Nicolò is quiet, for a while. When he finally speaks, he says, "Try to rest, Yusuf. I will keep watch tonight."

Yusuf waits. Nicolò does not move, nor show any sign of conceding. Just as stubborn as Andromache – well. He doesn't let himself finish that thought.

He waits a little longer, but Nicolò remains silent.

"Wake me for the second watch, then," Yusuf says, finally. Nicolò does not nod, but Yusuf no longer has the strength in him to push. He falls asleep quickly.

When he wakes, it is morning, and Nicolò is nowhere to be seen. Yusuf can only hope he found someone else for the second watch, and that he did not stay awake all night, but he would not be surprised if the latter were true.

During the day, they keep to their regular routine – Nicolò's silence and Yusuf's attempts to find anything to do that isn't think too much – but that night, when Nicolò finds him, he sets his sword down by his side and asks, "Will you wake me for the second shift?"

Yusuf nods quickly, too quickly, and Nicolò smiles, though it is small. It's the first time Yusuf's seen him smile in days.

He wakes Nicolò for the second shift and sleeps after that, and the next night, Yusuf takes the first and Nicolò the second.

It's a start, at the very least.

–

The day after they reach Helm's Deep, Nicolò is the first to see the rider.

He does not realise who it is at first: the figure is too distant. They wear a cloak with the hood pulled low over their face, and lean heavily over their horse, as if injured.

Nicolò's first thought is that it is a scout. His second thought, which he discounts quickly, is that it is Andromache, which. It cannot be. He does not dare imagine it.

When the figure keeps approaching, he shouts a warning to the guards on the walls. Yusuf, who had fallen asleep beside him, his back against the stone, startles awake. "What is it?" he asks, still half-asleep.

"I do not know, yet," Nicolò responds. He gets to his feet. Yusuf follows a moment later.

"I see it, now," Yusuf says, furrowing his brow. Nicolò's hand goes to his bow, just in case. If it is a scout, he will deal with them quickly.

Then, suddenly, Yusuf's eyes go wide, and he curses. Taps Nicolò twice on the shoulder, and runs along the wall, down the stairs, towards the gate, shouting at the guards to open it.

Nicolò looks again, then, and realises what Yusuf has seen. The rider's weapon is just visible over their right shoulder, and Nicolò knows the carvings on its handle, knows them because they are the twin of the carvings on the hilt of his hunting dagger, because both weapons were forged by the same person.

He is moving before he truly has time to process the thought. The gates are opened far too slowly, creaking with the movement, and by the time he can see the rider again she is sitting straighter in the saddle, a wide grin on her face, urging her horse forward. It is only Yusuf's hand on his arm that keeps him from running through the gates to greet her; when Nicolò looks back at him, his smile is bright enough to rival the midday sun.

Andromache.

Finally, she is there, riding through the gates like a king returning to her kingdom, like she had planned this all along, like Nicolò hadn't seen her fall from a cliff only a few days ago. She dismounts easily, before the horse has even fully stopped, and then he is running, and she is meeting him halfway and gathering him into her arms and laughing, even as he thinks he starts crying.

Then Yusuf is there too, and Nicolò has to step back but cannot bring himself to go far, and Andromache hugs him too, while Yusuf laughs, bright and loud.

"Where have you been," he is saying, and "I thought you were dead, Andromache, I thought we had lost you," and she laughs again and cups the back of his neck with one hand and says, "I'm okay, Nico, I'm okay."

"So," Andromache says once Yusuf steps back, too, her grin sharp despite how exhausted she must be. "Tell me what I've missed."

[icewindandboringhorror]

Misc. photos from the past year or so ~

[suncaptor]

also me being so incapable of telling romantic and platonic feelings apart is so silly to me now. they're literally just the same things except with different consistencies of the sparkly and fixatednesses.

[bumblingbabooshka]

Worst Guy Ever - Also, Unfortunately, Very Homosexual Convo. (subtextually)

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

my new thing is obsessing over a funny little guy for a few months before moving onto another funny little guy

[nostalgia-tblr]

I had another fic idea and the brain was like "no, that's too fluffy and romantic and YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO WRITE NICE THINGS, PEOPLE WOULD JUDGE YOU" but then I went "but what if it was kind of... comedy fluff?" and brain went "...yeah, okay, if you really must." Which I fucking HATE! Why can't I write nice things, brain?! Everyone else is allowed to! FFS, it's fanfiction, it doesn't have to be ~deep~ or any of that shit!

This has actually been a bit of an issue when I'm trying to write The WIP because while I told myself yeah sure go ahead and write the massively self-indulgent epically long (by my own odd standards) fic but still sometimes I get stuck because I'm not "allowed" to write something that appeals to me and my own sometimes niche interests??

Like angst I can do because that's "proper" somehow? WTF is that about? It's not proper! It's still daft! And comedy I'm allowed because I dunno apparently if it will make someone laugh that means it has "value"? It's very annoying, I don't like it.

Do other people have this? How do you deal with it? You'd think after all this time I'd be okay with writing any old shit that I want to. If anything it might be worse now. I remember years ago I could tell myself "Look, if you've spelled most of it correctly then it's already in like the better half of all the fanfic on the internet" which isn't really TRUE but I could go along with that and let myself write whatever-the-fuck I wanted to.

You know how many of us go "I'll write this fucked up thing... but I'll post it as Anon"? I get that with fluffy fic ideas as well. Or with things that are "too shippy" (WTF?) It's just such a stupid and weird form of self-criticism and it bothers me a lot.

[essektheylyss]

I am TIRED of hearing the whole "there is NO reason a paragraph shouldn't be more than four lines" writing critique. If Ursula Le Guin can write an asshole psychiatrist monologuing for a page and a half straight, it is FINE, actually.

You can have characters monologue, you can have a long bit of description, you can give exposition in chunks—the issue is when there's no PURPOSE to it and it's treated as a prerequisite dump of information rather than a curated telling.

As long as you're making choices about language and what is being conveyed so that it's relevant and matches the style, it's fine.

[twilightarcade]

Built up a poison resistance to has a ranking of the best tasting poisons pipeline