#I used that as reference because I SUCK at drawing explosion

[alisonstudios99]

Don't you hate it when you're a hero vigilante and set off an explosion for good reasons but when you have to explain it to the police, your friend, whose a criminal "genius" and had fun during it, worded it SO WRONG so now you're wanted by the government?

[demonir]

What are the tf2 Kumamon weapons like?

been having a complicated few days but I finally had the energy to sit down and do this so here we go!!!

I feel soldier kumamon would have standard kumamon's weapon as it kinda reminds me of the rocket launcher already? even thought they aren't similar, but reading up on kumamons wiki info and how it's a soldier and such I'm like yeah it fits

As for pyro kumamon...well it's an ice digimon so a flamethrower does not make much sense so pyro kumamon has been changed to uhh... cryo kumamon! they got a freeze gun now! I made the chamber that I assume would store the fuel transparent because I like the idea of seeing the freeze juice sloshing inside hehe

As for the other mercs? I think their weapons would look mostly the same just slightly simplified? although tf2's style is already rather cartoony so not a lot of change would be made in my opinion, if you wanna know about how they WORK however...well

Having established that it's an ice type digimon that shoots snowball projectiles the rest is sort of easy? standard bullets are just snowballs meaning heavy's is a snowball minigun for example (lol that's adorable) I know that this technically means I've referred to soldier's rockets as "standard bullets" but bear with me ok?? haha get it? bear? ahem anyways- soldier shoots COOL snowballs ok? SPECIAL snowballs there ya go-

Demoman's are just a different kind of snowball as the wiki I'm checking says kumamon has a variety of different snowballs it can use

We're just gonna interpret "according to purpose" as "depending on the class" and say demo kumamon has sticky snowballs and uhh pill snowballs? im more inclined to say they are sort of explosive ice cubes bc snowballs do NOT bounce

Sniper kumamon probs shoots piercing icicles straight into ya brain from his patented Kumma Co rifle (haha see what I did there?) As for Engie's sentries-

I told myself I was NOT going to draw a sentry EVER IN MY LIFE but midway through writing this post I was like no no no no I must illustrate this. Level 3 snow sentry is slightly taller than the average kumamon unlike in game tf2's sentry that is slightly shorter than real engineer, this is not because I am some sort of genius mastermind with huge plans in mind this is because I suck with proportions (and I drew this without having a reference of the sentry next to engie at hand) But anyway the snow sentry has a steady supply of snowballs to kill you with <3

I have NO idea how medic's medigun would work let's just say it does, same goes for spy's disguises

Anyways uhh I didn't intend for this to go for so long or get so in depth I just tried to be as faithful as I could to both digimon and tf2 but 1: I am new to digimon I am like a freshly born baby I had to go look through 3 different digimon wikis for info on this stuff bc i wanted to take my fictional polar bear SERIOUSLY and 2: while I AM a huge tf2 fan I am not knowledgeable on the weapons department so this was a real doozy for me

If any of you digimon/tf2 fans have any ideas/suggestions or even corrections I am all ears! these are just my ideas coming from someone who made a crack au at 12 am one night because some random anonymous person on the internet told them to

Also I've been calling it kumamon the entire time but it's name is also chackmon???? I feel properly pranked

[abbyzenken]

Alright you people.... SPLITTER GIRL HEADCANON EXPLOSION TIME!!!! :3

In my days of using Tumblr but I have never posted headcanons nor think much about tuem... but splittet girl is making my head full of tjem so here we go

1 . She is roommates with chemical girl. Splitter really loves annoying the shit out of her and even calls her "chemical-X" (funny powerpuff girls reference... eeheheheh);; on a side note, they live on a duplex

1.1 Some stupid shit Splitter really LOVES to do is push bowling balls down the stars, blasting very shitty music and so on ^^ To annoy her roommate even more, she blasts this super shitty "song", at max volumne, not even bothering to turn it off nor be even more quiet; she just sits there and dances like a drunk lady. Hell, she will even laugh like a bitch (song link below, view at your VERY own risk, it is so fucking shitty oh my god someone please take away this guy's suno activies)

• Speaking of this... she dances like an idiot^^

...anyway I apologize for putting a shitty """song"""... back to what I was ramblign about

2 . Splitter girl REALLY loves doing parodies of children's books and those fuckass AI ""songs"", and oh boy are they so fucking funny;; She made alot of parodies of the shitpiece linked below

3 . Her room is just a bunch of wires, cables, chargers and whatever the fuck,, Weevil said that she'd have a shitty depression room but I personally think it would be shittier. There would be posters of badly drawn stickmen, unorganized wires under her bed and so on

4 . Speaking of the stickmen,, she draws like Brewstew:pp she also watches Brewstew alot because it suits her humor and gets a super good laugh ay them,, not to mention has merch^^

5 . She has VERY shitty hair. Like it is all knotty and shit, super hard to detangle that someone, regardless if it is her roommate or somebody else, has to make her go to a super professional hairdresser

6 . She makes ramen when she is SUPER high. When I say super high I mean like, a fucked up combination of someone smoking a blunt, Lindshey Lohan and an extremely shitty person. When making ramen, she would put all sorts of random bullshit - makeup, olives, anything, INCLUDING wood and metal. And then she dumps it all into the toilet and. fucking clogs it. And then her roommate would wonder what the hell happened and who made knock-off fairy dust and calls a plumber to fix that shit

7 . Unironically plays knockoffs of well-known games. Like instead of "Uno", she would play a very shitty knockoff called "Cnuno". I'd like to imagine that she just brought it one day and shoved it on chemical girl's face. It went like this :

"HEY GIRLIE!!!! LOOK WHAT I BROUGHT!!" "oh, that's nice^^ what is it, the game uno? "Oh Chemical-X, it's better! Do you wanna play... THE SHITTIER VERSION CNUNO?^^" "...what the FUCK is a Cnuno?!"

8 . Fast typer. Like in her journal entry she has so much spelling mistakes (such as "me/.", "norma;l" and so on). Not to mention she would also not put a comma where needed, and would put all caps letters when making a sentence sometimes (sOmethign lik;e This; yes I am typing like splitter just for this example)

9 . She absolutely LOVES getting drunk and going to sobriety tests. She would hope that her table will be the drunk table and if it is, she will scream so fucking loud and immediatly get as much as she can, and on the sobriety test, she is absolutely fucking shitty

10 . She and chemical girl would go to the same school and would share some of the same classes^^ For example, they would share woodshop class - chemical would be extremely good at it, meanwhile splitter sucks ass at it

That's all I have^^ I will share more splitter headcanons and possibly of the other girls (including chemical) tomorrow, so please look foward to it:3

[meinlieberdreihund]

how do you think howards parents look like? or if theyre shown already idk i never watched tusk but could u draw them or something :3

Mild spoilers for Tusk (2014)

When Howard is operating on Wallace he recounts some of his childhood, and we find out that when he was ten years old his parents were murdered by thieves in an alleyway when they were taking him out to dinner one night during a visit to Montreal. He doesn't go into much detail about them but I have a few ideas based on what we do know- firstly I think they probably lived rurally, at least since they had Howard, because he says up until that visit to Montreal he had never been somewhere so "beautiful and bright and big and wonderful" in his life. I feel like it makes sense with his misanthropy that he began life slightly isolated from society, only for his first encounter in a bustling city to end horrifically (and then lead to him being sent to an orphanage and then an asylum which he goes more into detail about during the same operation scene).

I also think he might have come from a family of mariners- although it didn't make the final cut, he says his grandparents died in the 1917 Halifax explosion, meaning they were in the harbour that day and maybe his grandfather was a fisherman or sailor by trade. His father was sent to boarding school a week before so he narrowly avoided also dying with them. As for his mother, the only info we really get on her is that her throat was cut the night she died.

Howard was 16 during the 1944 Normandy landings, which I think means he was born in 1928 (I suck at maths), so it'd be the 30s when he was a child with his parents before they died. I've done some drawings with that in mind, using 1930s references for the clothes and hair (sorry if it's inaccurate). Since they don't appear on screen the designs aren't canon and are just my idea of what they might have looked like. So here's Howard fishing with his dad and playing dress up with his mum

[omeletcat]

ALRIGHT IT TOOK ME A BIT TO GET MY HEAD STRAIGHT BUT I THINK I'VE FOUND A WAY TO FIX COMBAT IN MY GAME, MAKE IT MORE FUN, MAKE IT MORE ENGAGING, ANDDD MAKE IT MORE UNIQUE!!!! these are the 2 main characters in my game currently named sun and moon (caus i don't have good names yet) they play a big role in the story and until now i have only really been seeing sun as a bonus option for like extra damage in battle, BUT NOW I FOUND A PERFECT SOLUTION at the beginning of the game you start out alone as moon, with 2 main attacks and a dash, attack 1 is a floating hand you can slap and punch people with, the hand follows your mouse and can be used to pick stuff up and solve puzzles. attack 2 will be a bullet or a slash attack that shoots a slash in the air at the mouse. both of these attacks will have "variants" different changes based on certain environmental things like the distance of the mouse from the player when you use the attack, maybe even the movement of the mouse like drawing a circle before attacking. using these different variant sof the same attack will make boring fights less stale and way more engaging!!!! ALSO i got this insane idea: "combo's" what if i make it so using different attacks at the same time will make different effects? that will add even more creativity and intrigue into the game!! this whole revelation came from looking some more into magica 2 and smash, it made me realize the reasons why a single set of moves doesn't get very old very fast in those games, because there aer insane amounts of combo's and ways to use the attacks, that way it doesn't get stale!!!! moon (and sun) will of course get more attacks i already have 1 in mind but i already feel like i am spoiling so much on this blog lol. BUT THATS HTE MAIN PLAN BUT ALSO: SUN, before, i only thought of her as a supporting character, someone you can click on to use for an ultimate battle like (this is gonna be an insanely specific reference) this one inazuma eleven game (a football game imagine fifa but with more anime in it), if you shoot a ball when you are in a certain area and have certain requirements filled you can do a teamup attack that is extra strong. i though tof something like that, BUT THATS SO BORINGGGG, i don't want to make my secondairy character and one of my MAIN CHARACTERS A SECONDARY ACTION!!!! SOOO I LOOKED BACK AGAIN AT THOSE INAZUMA GAMES AND FOUND ANOTHER THING, IN THE FIFA GAMES AND IN INAZUMA YOU CAN SWICH CHARACTERS!!! you see waht i'm getting at??? you will be able to switch from Moon to sun to get a whole different attack pattern and options. sun will be more close combatty and have less distance then moon. soo when you're soulbar( kinda like a mana bar, every spell you cast/attack you use takes off a little bit of that meter, and it slowly fills itself up) is empty you can switch to sun and be forced to go close distance (a percentage of the mana is shared tho just to make it a real threat, or not idk? either i will make it so that mana is smth annoying you have to look after, or it will just be a meter saying " hey you haven't used this other character in a bit! go do that while your main attacks fill up again" but i'l figure that out some other time ANYWAY sun's moveset will look something like this a dash just like moon but instead of some kind of energy surge, sun blasts herself forward with fire or an explosion or smth. the first is a basic punch that blasts an explosion/fire in front of the punch for extra distance but only a little bit, just enough so its reachable, i imagine if you dash and then do this attack, it will make an extra big punch and blast the enemy away. the secondary attack will be a longer distance continuous fireblast that chips away your soulbar slowly, the dahs version may be a big long ass laser beam ish fireblast?

and then not rly an attack? but a thing she can do, she can make her raccoon flip suck up stuff and make a temporary shield against attacks. so all the bullets gets sucked up in his cute mouth ALSO in non battle scenario's both moon and sun have their own skills they use to progressin puzzle's and exploring levels, moon can huse their hand to do puzzle stuff and pick stuff up easy, and sun can smash big blocks of stone to open new area's (and more but i can't say anything caus that would be boringgg) so a bit of a summary this is what i will add to make the game less boring -attack variants -attack combo's -2 main characters with different movesets -a switch option between the characters -ingame puzzle adn exploration functions different to the 2 charactrs

[kai-ninjago]

NINJAGO HEADCANONS FROM THE REAL KAI NINJAGO

Picrew by naylissah :)

Please refer to my age headcanon post for reference

(Warning for brief mentions of s/h, suicidal ideation, eating disorders, canon typical violence, and gender dysphoria)

A character named Day will be mentioned sometimes, that’s my s/i— he’ll be in the next post :]

Cole (he/him, gay)

(The picrews depict him as a human and as a ghost— I would have made early seasons vs late seasons, but I headcanon that he used to straighten his hair instead of actually taking care of it, and there weren’t many straight hair options lol— anyway)

6’1”

Afrolatino

Has anxiety, OCD, depression, manageable aquaphobia (leftover from being a ghost), and PTSD

he has had a crush on Day since like early season one, but they didn’t start dating until after season five

Smoked cigarettes as a younger teen until Sensei made him quit when he started training— only Jay knows this

His best friends are Jay, Nya, and Day

Still feels kind of awkward with Zane, cause Zane and Day were dating for a few years

Has a tattoo of rocky on his back

Never really liked Sensei Garmadon, but still respects him

His hobbies include cooking, listening to music, dancing, drawing, and calligraphy

He actually becomes really good at cooking over time, he just sucked in like season one because he was still learning

Attended fancy private schools before running away

His favorite genres of music are classic rock and classical (like piano and shit)

Contrary to what some may think, he’s not actually naturally gifted at dancing. He still dances for fun, but was never exceptionally good at it

His OCD manifests through checking behaviors, like making sure all the doors and windows are locked

Used to s/h a lot but fell out of the habit when he became a ghost and has been clean for a while since then

Jay Walker (she/he/they, transfem sapphic bigender)

(The picrews depict them in early seasons, like s1-3 and then later on, once she’s further along in her transition)

5’7”

Mixed white/japanese

Has anxiety, bpd, autism, and severe PTSD from the abuse they suffered on misfortune’s keep

Bleaches her hair, it’s naturally brown

Stims by playing with her hair— during prolonged periods of stress (like during any of the show seasons where they’re fighting bad guys for a few months) they get bald patches from tearing out their hair

Also stims by chewing and humming

Was homeschooled

Her special interests are Starfarer, space, robots/technology, and dinosaurs

Gets around four hours of sleep on average, spends a lot of time reading or playing video games at night

It took a really, really long time for her to learn to cope with everything that happened in season six. For a few months she couldn’t even train with the others because seeing someone raise a hand against her, even to spar, would trigger a panic attack

Infodumps a lot and never really feels shy about this because they grew up with the most supportive parents ever <3

Realized she was not cis all the way in season one, but didn’t bother to figure it out until they had some time away from the team in between seasons three and four

Started casually dating Nya in season one, fell really deeply in love, was heartbroken when Nya broke up w them for being too attached, was still in love with her all the way until several years later, when Nya fell back in love with her and they rekindled their relationship several years after season six. Nya was willing to try dating again because over the years Jay had matured and become more emotionally independent

Gets lichtenberg scars from using her lightning powers

Eyes glow when powered up

Over time she becomes really self conscious about her body, and no longer feels comfortable wearing anything that reveals their scars out in public— doesn’t mind changing clothes along with the rest of the ninja, though

The scar over her right eye is from something completely unrelated to ninja business, however— it’s a burn from an explosion when Jay was building an invention prior to meeting Wu

Her best friends are Cole, Day, and Nya

Kai Jiang (he/him, bisexual trans male)

(Picrew depicts him in like season one vs the end)

5’4”

Mixed Latino/chinese

Has autism, depression, extreme aquaphobia, has recovered from an eating disorder, and PTSD

Nya is the only person who knows his deadname

Used to be extremely underweight because they had the type of body where, if thin enough for the fat to come off his breasts, his chests almost looked flat

He has since been able to go on testosterone and had top surgery, and is more comfortable gaining weight

The habit to always just say he’s not hungry was also influenced by him and Nya not having enough to eat as kids, so he’d always let her have as much of his food as he could get away with

After years of living with Wu (who is old and rich) he’s also grown slightly more used to having things and being able to eat as much as he needs

Doesn’t s/h on purpose, but subconsciously picks and tears at his skin, so he’s always covered in bandaids. He also acts recklessly in battle when he’s feeling suicidal

Always gets his hair cut by Nya— in fact, most of the ninja do

His joints are all weird from breaking them and not going to the doctor about it

Dropped out of school when his parents disappeared so he could focus on running the blacksmith shop— he wanted Nya to be able to stay in school, but that only lasted until around jr high, at which point they couldn’t afford tuition

He stims by hitting himself and doing repetitive motions (like clapping his hands or bouncing his leg)

He’s really insecure about his appearance because he thinks he doesn’t look as masculine as the rest of the team

Has a stuffed animal as his comfort item. He gave it to Lloyd as sort of an olive branch when they first started living with the team, but has since gotten it back

Had a crush on Skylor— they dated for a while, but broke up cause they realized they’d be better as friends lol

His best friends are Jay, Zane, and Day

Zane Julian (ai/him, queer, nonbinary)

(Picrew shows Zane’s “human” appearance and after ai was rebuilt)

5’11”, 6’5” (rebuilt)

Dr. Julian modeled Zane after himself, so both of them are black and albino

(However, Zane has purple eyes because that was Dr. Julian’s favorite color)

Zane’s magical power source gives ai a more human consciousness, meaning ais capable of having depression and PTSD despite being a droid

Only uses “he/him” for convenience because ai presents masculinely— ai feels indifferent to the standard pronoun sets, but uses “ai/ai/ais” pronouns with close friends because it gives ai euphoria

(Ai/ai as in artificial intelligence)

Would definitely be dead if ai didn’t have Pixal to calm ai down during ais depressive episodes

Zane is the calmest and most levelheaded of the group; ai isn’t shaken by much— the one thing that truly scares ai is the fact that ais friends are mortal, and ai is not

Only ever talks to Pixal about being depressed. Pixal understands ais fears best because Pixal is also an immortal robot

Ai was dating Day from season one until the beginning of season three, when ai broke up with him because ai realized ai didn’t really love him that much.

Zane then pursued a queerplatonic relationship with Pixal, who ai felt a strong emotional connection to

Ai was rebuilt a lot bigger and stronger than before because the people on Chen’s island who repaired ai made ai to be the ideal fighting droid, and when ai had been built the first time ais only purpose was to enjoy life, not fight

The scar on ais face in the first image is from when the great devourer tried to stab(?) ai with it’s pointy tail, but just barely got a piece of ai’s face. Part of it fell off, but Jay welded it back on

Ais best friends are Pixal and Kai

Knows literally everything (is a robot) but ais weird power source can cause them to experience some human flaws, like forgetfulness

Nya Jiang (she/her, bisexual and demiromantic with a female preference)

(Picrews show season 1 vs the end)

5’5”

Mixed latina/Chinese

Has OCD, PTSD, anxiety, and bipolar disorder

Younger than Kai by one year (they’re siblings fyi)

Doesn’t remember her parents very well

Feels responsible for making everyone in the group feel happy and safe

She gets recurring nightmares and experiences insomnia during stressful times in her life

Picks at her skin when anxious and has some scars on her face— she used to feel self conscious about them, but doesn’t really care anymore

Her best friends are Day and Zane

Used to straighten her hair

Ends up having the most tattoos and piercings out of the whole team

Is very competitive

When she and Jay were first dating, she didn’t view it as anything more than really casual kinda stuff because she saw them as more of a friend back then

Has always put a lot of pressure on herself to not be a burden ever since her and Kai’s parents disappeared

She has a really hard time asking for help because of this

She is closer with Sensei than the rest of the team, and views him as kind of a father figure

Secretly liked being samurai x more than the water ninja

Has an undercut now

Is really good friends with Pixal and Skylor

Okay that’s all for these characters— in my next headcanon post I’ll talk about my s/i, Morro, Pixal, Skylor, Ronin, Lloyd, and maybe some others!

[adultswim2021]

Metalocalypse #31: “Dethrace” | June 16, 2008 - 12:00AM | S02E11

NOTE: I wrote this last night, but accidentally saved it as a draft instead of scheduling it to post. Sorry, bros.

Hey, I’m going easy on myself tonight. I deserve it after that last gigantic post. The Venture Bros. can take a lot out of me. Gosh, it’s a lot!

This one is a bit slight, and hardly excellent, but it's a nice hang with my personal close friends, the men from Metalocalypse Rock Band. In this one, Murderface is miffed that Toki and Skwisgaar have undermined his command performance of the Star Spangled Banner using nothing more than his dick and a bass guitar. They undermined Murderface by being in a high speed police chase, which interrupts the broadcast of Murderface rockin with his brain out. 

Speaking of brain out, the best scene in this episode are Toki and Skwisgaar at traffic school, watching an ultra violent educational video about how being irresponsible with your car can get your body all wet and in pieces. It is wet from your blood getting escaped from your body. Good lines, gruesome drawings, it’s the good shit of the episode. 

Murderface wants to do a convoluted event that’s a race and also a concert. Toki and Skwisgaar get involved by way of their community service. And Nathan Explosion and Pickles not only have nothing to do with the plot, but they make a point to just always be reading the paper whenever they are referred to. This is a funny meta-joke about how frustrating it must be to have a show like this and constantly have to come up with individual plots for each character. At least, I assume that’s what this is.

MAIL BAG

Hi this is Gabe Teplen the original voice of Moltar. I just want to say you are doing a great job and maybe give the original Space Ghost a spin sometimes. My granddaughters say it's just as funny as Coast to Coast.

Hi, my name is Mayor Giuliani, and I'm gay

I have a blog where I cover Adult Swim's original comedy shows in chronological order from the first stealth pilot premieres onward. every episode of every adult swim original program reviewed by a middle-aged dipshit. go here if you wanna start at the start

Hey, fuck you man, don't copy and paste stuff I say on other websites and then combine it with stuff I say on this website and send it to me anonymously. That is really fucking rude and it pisses me off. I'm actually pissed off about this. EAT SHIT MOTHER FUCKER

Should I go see Barbie or Oppenheimer? Let's date these blog posts. Which one are you more willing to see? Provided you get a big hamburger and fries with your movie either way.

You should watch any other movie. But if I had to pick between those two I'd watch Barbie. Oppenheimer just seems too boring, sorry. How big is the hamburger

Lesbian porno was like really good in the 80s but as time went on it just became so bad. Sure there are still hot women fucking but there is no sensuality. You can tell they are doing it contractually and have no love in licking pussy, ect. What do you think?

I don't like discussing sexual stuff because it's alienating, but I disagree. We are living in a golden age of sapphic erotica, and you need look no further than two girls I call Angela & Strawberry. Look them up. They lick, they suck, they finger, and they ... FUCK?????

You're supreme hatred of pitbulls is so funny. My aunt had a pitbull. She died.

I'm sorry to hear about your Aunt that got eatten by her own pitbull :(

I would prefer if you just said nothing than do the AI bit. I have to deal with my favorite fast food reviewer outsourcing his titles/descriptions to ChatGPT and it's quite frankly distasteful. The shit doesn't know anything about anything.

FUCK YOU! FREEDOM OF GENERATED SPEECH BITCH!! But by coincidence I've decided to retire the bit, but not because of you. It's my choice and I'm the boss and I'm the one that says how the rules goes.

[backtothefanfiction]

Hi! This isn't an ask, but wanted you to know that you may wish to add a couple more tags to your excellent Peter Parker fic: #peter parker fanfiction, #tasm fanfiction, and just plain #tasm may alert more readers to your work. Some people get grumpy with the last one because they don't want fics in general tags, but tbh it's not like there's thousands of people discussing the two movies (I wish there were!) and there are quite a few fics that use that tag. It's how I've found new authors. It can be a little discouraging for writers (especially in with spider-man) because there's tons of MCU Peter (and now ATSV) but even there, people tend to 'like' instead of reblog. Shame, really because reblogs are in some ways better than tags for trying out new works/authors. But please do keep writing because that's one thing creators on Tumblr forget sometimes. Commercial authors have entire PR/marketing teams that front their material and you're writing solo with readers who are balancing their own work/writing/drawing/school/etc commitments and sometimes it feels like you're posting into a void. You're not. You're a star in the Tumblr galaxy that we, the astronomers, are still learning about. (damn, my English teacher hated it when I ended sentences with prepositions but oh well. Sucks to her assmar. Bonus points if you catch the reference)

Oh, and I'm trying desperately not to ask for hints on how long The Angel in the Garden... is going to be because I kinda don't want it to end. It's been nine great chapters so far!

Cheers for the heads up, I will definitely try to include those tags going forward. (I always feel like I'm missing some or that there should just be more haha)

Also I am currently writing chapter 13 but oh I don't think I am anywhere near finished. I think our current big explosion of a plot twist though is the mid way point in the story and the big turning point. Currently trudging through less twisty story right now as we allow things to settle and of course healing time for mortal injuries (not everyone can have Peter's Spider powers unfortunately), but I've got a couple clear points I'm working to right now to get me to my ending but as I said before, I have tried to allow me as much leeway as possible for my characters to take things any which way they want to go, so there may be a couple more grenades up the sleeve still yet to come I don't know about, one of which I think I am writing in right now and you'll be pleased to know it focuses on our Miss Felicia.

[arbitrarycategories]

how would you rate class 1a's hero NAMES best to worst?

oh GOD. okay incoming LONG POST y'all. I have ch 45 open so I know what the names mean and EVERYTHING.

BEST HERO NAME

Rainy Season Hero: Froppy - Cute, creative, and it references her quirk! This is a great, fun hero name that is easy to remember and easier to like!

Jet-Black Hero: Tsukuyomi - Saying this name out loud makes me feel like I am in an action movie, so PLUS POINTS!! Also the kids in the chapter helpfully informed me that this name belongs to the god of the night! That's super cool!

Sturdy Hero: Red Riot - An invigorating name that I feel should have an exclamation point behind it! A good name for a good hero! Minus a few points for being a fanboy references, but it is at least a tasteful fanboy reference!

Uravity - A cute, creative pun that references both her name and her quirk! A good name!

Ingenium - A solid legacy name! A good name that references the quirk, but minus points because this name has been used before. WE know that Tensei asked Tenya to use it, but the general public won't. This may cause some confusion.

Everything Hero: Creati - Clever, creative, references her quirk, and sticks in your mind! A good name!

Petting Hero: Anima - Cute, references his quirk, and sticks in your mind! A good name!

Stun Gun Hero: Chargebolt - Creative, fun, and catchy! References his quirk without being overbearing! Decently electric! However, I feel like I have to dock points because this guy has never once used a stun gun. Sorry, Chargebolt.

Taping Hero: Cellophane - Straightforward, references the quirk, but has a ring to it! On the more boring side of catchy, but not to the point of being immediately forgettable!

Sweets Hero: Sugarman - A direct reference to his quirk, but one that makes him sound approachable and nice! It doesn't mention the strength part of his quirk, which I weirdly like.

Tentacle Hero: Tentacole - It's just a funny way to say tentacle I guess? I don't get it, but it sticks in my mind, so it can't be TOO bad of a hero name!

Pinky: This name tells me NOTHING about the hero. Also, it's based on... the color of her skin? Five years after she retires, a gossip mag is going to publish an article that calls her name "antiquated" and "racist against those with heteromorphic traits" and then that shit will never end.

Martial Arts Hero: Tailman - The pre-name bit saying "martial arts" in it is the most interesting thing about this name. A bit too direct of a reference to the hero's quirk.

Stealth Hero: Invisible Girl - While it relates to her quirk, it relates a little too closely. It's kind of boring.

Hearing Hero: Earphone Jack - This is the name of the hero's quirk. A cop-out name.

Shining Hero: Can't Stop Twinkling - This name is a whole sentence. Back to the drawing board, please!

Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight - On top of taking an hour to say, this name literally references murder, and has a nerdy fanboy All Might reference! Are you a fucking middle schooler, Dynamight sir?

Fresh-Picked Hero: Grape Juice - Evokes a certain image but does not relate to the hero's quirk except in an abstract way.

Deku - To literally everyone outside of your class, this name is an insult! You have to explain yourself to everyone you meet. Why. I understand the narrative about changing and growing and improving and reclaiming old insults but from a professional standpoint this is horrendous.

Shouto - This is your civilian name, sir. While there is a precedent, this sucks. Please pick a real name.

WORST HERO NAME

[supernaturallyobsessedchic]

Our Girl

J2 x Reader

Word Count: 1,419

Summary: Jensen and Jared treat the reader to an exciting birthday.

Warnings: Smut (P in V, Anal sex, protected sex and unprotected sex, Oral Fem Receiving, fingering, double penetration, overstimulation, threesome.)

Masterlist

a/n: Could be a teaser for a possible J2 Series, still in the brainstorming works.

a/n#2: Originally a Birthday Girl rewrite, but just so there’s no doubles on here, and not an attempt at a Re-entry on Jen’s SPN Tell me a Story Bingo.

~

She laid between Jared and Jensen as they slept through the night. She had snuggled against Jensen, laying her head on his chest while Jared snuggled in behind her.

As the sun began to rise over the horizon, and the world slowly waking up, she tossed onto her back, Jared being long awake.

Jensen woke up, admiring the beauty he woke up to. Brushing her hair from her face. She looked so peaceful as she slept.

He realized the day as he laid there. It was her birthday. She has turned 30 today. Originally, they didn’t plan on doing anything for her birthday, she didn’t ask for anything. But Jared and Jensen wanted to treat her to a day she won’t soon forget.

He laid a gentle kiss just below her jaw, traveling down her neck. Sucking at her pulse point. Drawing out a moan from her sleepy lips.

His hand hiked up her shirt, palming her breast, pinching the hardening bud between his fingers. He was slowly pulling her out of a deep slumber, feeling her squirm under his touch in her sleepy state.

His kisses traveled down her torso, up her thigh as he worked her panties off of her. Seeing a wet streak from her heat. Making him smirk.

His kisses got higher up her thighs to her soaking mound. And he placed a kiss on her sensitive clit. Her hips jerked up at the warmth his lips offered.

The covers were pulled off over his head, seeing her darkened eyes looking back at him.

He worked her legs over his shoulders as he made himself at home and went to work. Lapping his tongue over the sensitive bud.

She threw her head back with desire as a moan escaped her throat.

He pinned her hips when they jerked again wanting more friction. His lips locked on as his tongue worked around and around her clit, building her up.

“Fuck Jay,” she moans. Her hands running through his hair, holding him in place.

She felt his thick fingers enter her aching heat; her breath hitched in the back of her throat.

His finger rubbing against her g-spot ever so gingerly, driving her nuts.

“Oh lookie here.” Jared says entering their room.

Making a B line for their bed, his lips latching on to her neck, kissing and sucking her sensitive spots. Driving her ever crazier.

She felt the heat in her belly grow, and grow with each lap of Jensen’s tongue, every thrust of his fingers, every suck of Jared’s kisses. Until it, snapped in a nuclear explosion of pleasure.

Her back arched off of the bed as she came on Jensen’s mouth. His fingers thrust slowly to a stop, and eventually once she calmed down, he pulled his mouth off of her mound, his beard soaked in her arousal.

“Happy Birthday Y/N.” He says with a dark smirk.

“I’m loving what you got planned so far.” She pants.

“I can think of something, because seeing you two like that, I gotten so hard, I want some of this.”

“Sam here.” Jensen says.

“Then why not come get it,” she says wiggling her hips.

They discard their clothes like they were on fire. And they weren’t joking at how hard they’ve gotten.

“Fuck me.” She groans at the sight of them.

“We plan on it baby.” Jared says.

She was sandwiched between the two giant Texans, Jared delivered a passionate, hungry kiss to her lips. Jensen behind her kissing the nap of her neck.

“How do you want us baby?” Jensen asked.

“I want Jared behind me, and you on top of me.”

“And do you want me in your ass, of do you think you can handle both of us in that tight little pussy of yours?” Jared asked.

“Oh god, so tempting. Let’s try both.” She smirks.

“One at a time baby.” Jensen says.

Jared hopped up to the nightstand to grab the bottle of lube, Jensen taking his place on top of her, kissing her ever so passionately. Their tongues dancing across each other’s mouths. Sucking his lip, driving him crazy.

Jared settled behind her, his hands traveling down her shoulders to her back, then sliding between her cheeks. Her hips bucked into his hand; Jared smirked.

“Very impatient little birthday girl you are.” Jared says in her ear. Before kissing behind her ear, bringing her ear lobe between his teeth gently.

Pulling away slightly, he lubed up his fingers, prepping her tight hole.

The distraction was enough for Jensen to drive his cock balls deep into her core. Her jaw drops, letting a wanton moan escape from her throat.

And that distraction was enough for Jared to scissor his fingers in her hold, prepping her for him.

Pulling his fingers free, Jared slides on a condom before lubing up one more time and inches his way into her.

A low, pleasured moan escapes her lips into Jensen’s shoulder. Feeling her holes fill up with her two favorite men in her life.

“You love that feeling? Feeling how full you are of our cocks?” Jensen says lowly into her ear. Making her whine and grind her hips against them.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Jensen adds.

“And I’ll even take that as, someone move.” Jared chuckles.

“Well lets not keep her waiting.” Jensen says as he pulls out before slamming back in. the sensation causing a yelp escape from her mouth.

Jared slightly pulling out, the head not even escaping from the opening, before slamming back in, his balls smacking against her.

And then they started a pace that had a rhythm when one pulls out someone thrusts in and rinse and repeat.

Y/N bounced up and down against Jared at the force of which they were delivering.

Her breathing was catching up as the coil in her abdomen built up in intensity. Each moan escaping with each breath.

“Sounds like she’s close again,” Jared growled.

“Lets give it to her.”

“God, I’m…” She moaned.

Her walls clamped down hard without warning around them, she could feel a warm, wet ooze spill inside her womb as Jensen’s thrust slow.

Her back arched off of Jared’s chest, the back of her head nuzzled in the crook of Jared’s neck as she came with a strangled wanton moan.

“Got one more left in you Stacks?”

“Damn right I do, lets see how stretched she can get.”

“Fuck me.” She pants.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, we’ll get there.”

Jared slowly pulled out, he smiled proud at how stretched open she was from him.

Jensen stilled inside her as Jared guided his still hard cock to her soaking heat.

“Focus on me sweetheart, he’s gonna go slow. Just holler if you can’t take it.”

She nods against Jared. Jensen held her close giving Jared enough room to maneuver close to her so he could inch his way in.

She could feel her walls stretch to accommodate not only Jensen but now Jared, as he inched his way further in, until he was balls deep.

“What a trooper.” Jensen congratulated, planting a gentle kiss on her cheek.

“Oh god, someone start moving.” She moans.

They moved at the same time, nearly pulling out before thrusting back in.

“Oh god!” she moans.

Their pace starts slow as they worked her back up with each, full, thrust.

Her heart spiked into her throat as her coil slowly built up, a mixture of pain and pleasure.

Their paced quickened as they felt their end coming to a head.

“Oh, guys,” she moans. Her legs quivering and shaking as her orgasm draws near.

“Almost,” Jensen growls.

“There,” Jared adds, as his hips buckled against her, the used condom filling up with more of his seed.

Jensen’s hips buckled and spasmed not long after Jared, spilling more into her as her walls clamped shut around them nearly milking them dry, as she came with a scream, their names on her tongue.

She saw pure white, heated pleasure as they worked her through her high. Getting them through their own.

 She woke up, to Jensen and Jared passed out, sandwiching her between them. She noticed a certain glow on them as they slept, they noticed the same glow before sleep to them.

She snuggled more into them as best as she could, feeling their release slowly oozing out of her as she adjusted herself. Smiling, content with what she did with her two loves of her life.

A birthday present she will never forget, but she does have to think of something for them.

~

Tags:

@pandazombie69​, @luci-in-trenchcoats​, @supernatural-jackles​, @becs-bunker​, @evansrogerskitten​, @akshi8278​, @jayankles​, @jeaniespiehs20​, @winchesters-favorite-girl​, @mlovesstories​

~

Copying and reposting someone else’s content is plagiarism and illegal. This work is property of supernaturallyobsessedchic. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. 3/9/2021

[gallickingun]

o( ❛ᴗ❛ )o I think I need me so sleepy time fluffy morning Baku sex. I've been corrupting myself too much lately LOL. Thirst post or drabble I guess? "Hey, you awake?" "Do you have any idea what you do to me?" "Don't cum yet."

PAIRING: Bakugou Katsuki x Fem!Reader RATINGS: M/E+ WARNINGS: smut WORD COUNT: 1.9k+

request from THIS prompt list - prompt fill sentences will look like this.

“Hey, you awake?”

You groan, stuffing your head beneath your pillow. It isn’t enough that he has the audacity to wake up before the sun rises, but for him to bother you until your eyes are peeled open? You smack your lips together, a disgruntled sound raking against your throat as you close your eyes again.

His palm is warm as it travels down the length of your abdomen, as if his scarred hands are prodding at every one of your ribs to count them in the early morning light, “I know you’re awake, c’mere.”

“Go back to bed,” you murmur into the sheets, but it holds no intent because you’re doing as he says, swiveling your body to tuck into his chest. Bakugou’s arms slink underneath your sleep shirt, a shirt he recognizes as his own, fingerprints mapping out the dips and curves of your back and shoulders. You hear him groan into the crown of your hair and you smirk, your eyes lazily drawing their way up to look into his crimson orbs, “Can’t sleep?”

On cue, Bakugou’s hips rut forward, and you feel his very prevalent boner press into your thigh. Your thigh muscles tighten at the sensation, the half-asleep haze still fogging up your brain so you can only think in partial thoughts.

His nose nuzzles your forehead, nudging against the creases until your skin softens, smoothing beneath his kisses. He grunts when you roll your hips forward, a teasing cant of your waistline making his blunt fingernails bite into your skin. A low growl rumbles in his chest, making its way up his throat until every cell in his body is vibrating with anticipation.

“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” he murmurs into your tresses, voice dropped an octave when you hitch your thigh up over the top of his to get closer. Bakugou’s voice is still rough with sleep, all jagged edges and coarse tones as his mouth begins to wander, mumbling little aborted sentences into your skin, “Such a fuckin’ filthy tease in your sleep, babe. You feel that?”

He’s of course referring to the throbbing cock he’s currently sporting, pressed flush between your thighs and his. Bakugou licks the pad of his tongue over the length of your neck, tracing your jugular with his teeth. A fresh wave of arousal slickens the skin of your thighs, pre-come leaking from his tip to mix with your wetness.

“S’too early,” your murmuring against his collarbones, lazy, sloppy kisses pressed into his hot flesh.

Bakugou has always been a human heater – you suppose it’s just a side effect of his quirk. His body naturally runs hotter so he can kickstart his explosion quirk whenever he needs to. The stinging sensation of his palms as he tries to tame his power is not lost on you as his hands roam your body, pulling and dragging at you to keep you close and feel your frame.

He traipses a hand between your bodies, fingertips running down your abdomen until he reaches the spasming outer walls of your cunt, “Hah,” he is brash in his laughter, “you’re fuckin’ soaked, Princess. You really gonna tell me it’s too early?”

“Shuddup and fuck me,” you murmur into his neck, lavishing the skin with your teeth and tongue. Bakugou moans at the action, his eyelids slipping closed and his eyes rolling back in his head. You reach a hand up his neck to palm at his undercut until you get to a thatch of hair that you can hold onto, grasping at it desperately so you can bring him back down to kiss your mouth.

Bakugou is quick to roll himself over so he’s loitering above you, a shadow cast down on your body thanks to the beginning rays of the sunrise filtering in through your partially open blinds. He nudges his nose against the bridge of your face, tracing the outlines of your cheek bones while your hands busy themselves with his torso. You cannot get enough of his body, toned and yet somehow supple at the same time. Your fingers knead into the plush flesh of his ass, and he tilts his head so he can kiss you.

The head of his cock butterflies your pussy so he can collect the silvery strands of slick that have gathered between your lips. You moan into the cavity of his mouth, his teeth biting down on your tongue when he gets the chance, “Fuck, baby,” his voice is low as he sucks on the muscle, rutting his hips forward out of pure primal need.

“I love you,” you murmur into the void, playing with he blonde strands of hair that you can reach. Your other hand is rested between the planes of his shoulders, palming at the muscles that ripple as he moves.

Bakugou kisses your bottom lip, leaning back to admire your features, “I love you too.”

He accentuates the sentence by slowly dredging his cock forward, coating himself in your arousal at an agonizing pace that leaves you wanting more but somehow unable to beg for it. You adore him in these moments – when he is wanton enough to devour you whole, but uses his ever astounding self-restraint to savor your every sound. Bakugou is handsy when he’s just woken up, fingerprints searching for something to memorize, as if his very anatomy was pieced together to mesh with yours. He knows you like he knows himself, inside and out, and it only serves to better moments like this.

“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he’s almost whining, his voice thick as he does so. You find yourself sifting your fingers through his hair before your palm settles on his cheek, guiding his eyesight to your face so he can look down at you from where he’s hovering.

You swear you hear a gentle whimper when he makes eye contact with you, but you don’t press him about it, instead enjoying the view you have from beneath him. His hair shines like gold in the warm sunlight, his eyes are glittering rubies as his gaze bores into you, as if you might have all the secrets to the questions of the universe. You tilt your chin and kiss him on the mouth, tenderly and slow, and he matches your pace with the stuttering of his hips.

A moan passes between you, the origin of it unclear given that you now can’t tell where you end and he begins. You are a mess of tangled limbs and sounds, your arms and legs wound around his body as he fucks into you slowly. The bed creaks underneath your weight, but it only adds to the cacophony of sounds all intermingling together to form the melody of your morning.

“Damn, Princess,” Bakugou drops his mouth to your neck, softly sucking at a few different patches of skin. Hard enough to elicit a reaction in the way of your cunt clenching around his cock, but not hard enough that he might leave a mark that you’ll have to cover.

Bakugou works you to the precipice of pleasure, your climax fast approaching as the ministrations of his hips do not falter. You can feel his cock twitching from withing your walls and you clamp down to hold him steady, winding your hands in his hair as you hold him close, “N-No, don’t cum yet.”

He makes a strangled sound in the back of his throat, his hips bucking up into you in defiance, but it is only second nature for him. Bakugou kisses your jawline before murmuring in your ear, “I don’t know how you expect me to last much longer with this fucking perfect pussy of yours, all sloppy and wet around my cock.”

You shiver at his lewd words, your spine bolstering with confidence as he litters praise down on you like confetti. You tilt your head so your cheek is pressed into his, beckoning him forward with the gentle tug of your hand in his hair, “I-I wanna look at you when you cum.”

Bakugou is immediately upright, pulling his hips away from you so only the tip of him is submerged within your core, hot and throbbing with the imminence of his release. You feel him tensing up his body to try and force himself to look down at you, every nerve beneath his skin practically shattering at the sight of you so blissed-out and at his mercy.

His thumb brushes over the apple of your cheek and you feel like there has never been a more ethereal moment than this one. The soft smell of sweets cooking over a campfire fills your nostrils, a familiar taste in the air that you’ve come to know after many years of being with Bakugou Katsuki. Your chest brushes his as you inhale deeply, committing the moment to memory, commiserating it with the slight flare of your nostrils.

The sight of him so close to the crest of his release makes your thighs tense, but you want to savor this moment. These few seconds between when everything is calm and then the coil finally snaps, washing white-hot pleasure through your entire being. You press your palms to his cheeks, his still hazy eyes trying desperately to find a part of you to focus on.

A quiet curse falls from his lips before he sheathes his cock within you again, bottoming out on the first stroke. You can tell by the strain of his neck that he wants to lower his head, but he fights every instinct in his body and keeps his eyes focused on you, those vermillion irises ever present as you both begin to climb toward your release.

“Please, Katsuki,” you lick your lips and beg for him, clenching your thighs until they’re quivering, “cum in me, I want to feel you cum in me.”

Bakugou’s eyes are steely as he looks down at you, “Here you go, baby,” he murmurs into the void of your bedroom, the words airy and light as they drift from his lips to your ears.

Your heels dig into the plush of his backside, anchoring him to you as you feel the familiar heat of his spend coating your core. You moan in tandem with him, milking him with your glutinous walls trapping his cock inside. His tip is pressed hotly against your cervix, and you swear you can feel him in your spine, but that does nothing but stir your body into passion, brought even closer to the end when his thumb finds your clit.

“C’mon, Princess,” he mutters as he leans down to kiss you quickly on the mouth, “I want you to come for me, yeah? Come on my cock.”

That is all the encouragement your body needs, your arousal meeting his as you cry out, throwing your head forward to press against his collarbone. You sob at the feel of your body tensing up from head to toe, your orgasm shattering the world around you until all you can fathom is Katsuki.

Bakugou hums once you’ve fallen slack, nudging his nose along your cheek, “Where’s my girl?”

Your head falls back to the pillow and your hands find their familiar place in his ashen blonde locks, “Right here.”

As if there were anywhere else you’d rather be.

[diazevan]

Evan Begins Again

With the help of his family, Buck learns to love himself, flaws and all - which starts with reclaiming his given name.

Read on AO3

Words: 4436

Warnings: Mentions of past Self-Hate, Brief Injury Detail (on a call)

It starts with Eddie, but these things usually do.

Buck wishes he could be like Eddie, somebody who can freely speak his mind without fearing the fall.

When Eddie has something to say, he makes Buck listen, even if it's not something he wants to hear.

Discovering that he would become Christopher's legal guardian if his best friend dies prematurely was unexpected, but Buck welcomes it. 

The lengths he is willing to go for Christopher are infinite; he loves that kid like his own.

Strangely, that part of the conversation isn't what stuck or what keeps him up at night.

Being told that he's not expendable with such certainty, after a lifetime of believing that's all he is, has put his mind in a spin.

Maddie's told him that before, so has Bobby, Athena, Hen, Chimney, Albert, Taylor - everybody he cares about has, at one point, has told him that he's worth fighting for.

That wasn't anything new, but it's the way Eddie went about saying it, "Because, Evan, you came in here the other day, and you said you thought it would have been better if it had been you who was shot. You act like you're expendable. But you're wrong."

Evan.

Buck hates when people use his given name - well, at least he thought he did.

Hate wouldn't explain the warmth that spread across his chest when Eddie spoke his name, with just the right amount of love, with an unmistakable tinge of sass.

Aside from Maddie, whenever anybody says his name, he recoils like he's been burnt. He remembers his childhood, being reprimanded by his parents for his reckless behavior or called out by his teachers.

Whenever 'Evan' is used in a sentence, it isn't usually followed by words of affirmation.

Even with Maddie, she's adapted to using 'Buck' when she's proud of him or telling him how much she loves him. Emotions are high whenever she says, 'Evan,' like when he learned about Daniel.

"Evan, please don't leave. Just talk to me."

He talks to Dr. Copeland, and it's almost too easy for her to identify the problem.

'Buck' is meant to be a nickname, but it's bigger than that; it's a shield, a smokescreen, an excuse to hide his true feelings.

He separates himself into two; Buck gets to live while Evan suffers the weight of his hardships.

He can't keep doing that.

He has to face this problem, learn to love every piece of himself, even if it hurts.

If he doesn't, it will kill him.

Because one day, and soon, he'll become tired of 'Buck.'

The same way he did with Evan, then he'll be well and truly lost.

Things need to change.

***

It's a slow day, nobody's said anything to jinx that, yet, but the night is still young.

Athena has a day off; she's popped over like most Wednesdays, having helped Bobby with dinner.

Maddie surprises them all, dropping by with an excitable Jee-Yun.

Eddie and Chimney carry the stroller up the stairs while she holds Jee-Yun on her hip.

Taking his niece into his arms, Buck asks his sister, "How are you?"

The light in her eyes is brighter than the last time he saw her, "I'm better."

Buck sports his lopsided grin, "Good."

Jee-Yun jumps from person to person, delighted to be surrounded by her favorite people.

They settle on the couches; Jee-Yun stops on Maddie's lab, hit by the tired stick.

Buck sits, sandwiched between Bobby and Athena.

Maddie relaxes into the recliner while Chim perches on the chair's arm as he converses with Hen.

Hen and Eddie share a couch but have claimed separate ends; she sits nearer Chimney, busy discussing kindergarten admissions, which Buck can't believe, Jee-Yun's barely one.

Eddie is at the other end, listening to one of Athena's work stories.

Buck knows he should be involved, but he's lost track of where they were.

Everybody's conversations reach their natural ends - Buck leans in.

"Hey," He croaks - that's odd, his throat is tight, and he didn't realize.

All eyes are on him.

He fumbles with his fingers, "Can I ask you all something?"

Chimney shuffles forward, "Of course."

"Is everything okay?" Hen asks, eyes tracing over him.

Buck dips his head, "Yeah."

Athena takes his hand, "It doesn't sound it."

He insists, "Everything's fine."

"So," Eddie speaks gently, "What's up?"

Buck wonders if Eddie will catch on and understand that everything is changing because he is the first person in years, to remind Evan that he is worthy of love.

He clears his throat, "I want you to call me 'Evan.'"

The request is met by silence and pinched expressions of confusion.

"I'm still Buck," He blurts, "That's my nickname, always gonna be, but I was hoping that we could, like, switch between the two?"

"Okay," Bobby is cautiously gentle, "We can do that."

"It might take some adjustment time," Hen adds, "But of course, we can."

A weight shifts, "Cool, thanks."

"So, what's with the change?" Chimney asks, "I thought you hated your name?"

"I thought I did," He nervously rubs the nape of his neck, and his leg begins to bounce.

"Hey," Maddie sits up, startled, "You don't have to explain-"

Buck shakes his head, "You guys need to hear this."

Bobby presses his hand to Buck's knee, attempting to ease him.

"Talking with Dr. Copeland, I realized that in becoming Buck, I was trying to forget everything that came before," Buck explains, "It should just be a nickname, but it's not - it's a coping mechanism."

He locks eyes with a tearful Maddie, but she smiles with a nod, urging him to go on.

It's once in a blue moon when Buck opens up about how he's feeling.

"I can pretend that every bad thing that happened to me as Evan never happened," He continues, "Shitty childhood, bad friends, and Daniel..."

Everybody shifts uncomfortably on that note, especially Maddie, who draws her daughter closer to her chest.

Buck lifts his shoulders in a shrug, "But it doesn't work like that."

"No, it doesn't," Maddie speaks, quiet, "Those things leave a scar, Evan."

Hen speaks up, "An open one."

"I've never hated my name," Evan's lower lip trembles, "I hated me."

He expects pity or concerned gasps, but instead, he's offered understanding nods and intense gazes filled with love.

"I separate 'Evan' and 'Buck,' but they're both me," He cries, "Like with Buck, I've grown, changed for the better, have the family I've always wanted," Tears spill down his cheeks, "But Evan is buried, and I need to find me, again."

Maddie asks, "Because you feel loved as Buck but forgotten as Evan?"

He nods, "Yeah."

"Evan," Hen cries, her eyes wet with tears, "We love you completely."

Athena's gentle fingers grasp Evan's chin, her mouth curls into a smile, as tears freely fall, "Without a single string attached."

Buck breaths, "You promise?"

"We promise," Bobby reassures fast.

With a strangled sob, Evan crumbles, his shoulders sagging.

Bobby dives, collecting him in his arms.

Athena combs her hand through his hair.

Everybody moves, crowding him, in a hug.

Eddie kneels, gripping onto Evan's knee with all his strength, wrapping his arm around Hen, crouched beside him.

Hen grips onto Buck's forearm, her stance protective.

Chimney stands behind, hands resting on Buck's trembling shoulders.

Maddie takes the space beside Hen, taking Evan's hand, while she balances a half-asleep, confused, Jee-Yun on her knee.

Eddie speaks - his tone strong, "You're going to be okay, Evan."

***

It takes a month for the change to stick without the aura of awkwardness.

It is easy to get tongue-tied - in the beginning, there were many 'Buc-vans' and 'Ev-uk's,' but, at least he knew, they were trying.

After a couple of false starts, interchanging between 'Evan' and 'Buck' is set to stay.

Evan is sure that he's never been happier.

He stops over for dinner at Bobby and Athena's on Thursday nights.

While they're washing up, he gathers his shoes, slipping them on; he tries to be quiet, considering May's already in bed.

It's nearing midnight; he doesn't want to overstay his welcome.

"I better head home," Buck whispers, "Early start tomorrow."

"We have a free bed, you know?" Athena asks, gathering empty glasses off the dinner table, "Since Harry's with Michael."

"I wouldn't wanna intrude," He bends to do his laces

"Buckaroo, we invited you, remember?" Athena tells him, "Your apartment is almost an hour away—time you could spend sleeping."

Buck stops what he is doing and sighs with a grin; he knows exactly where this is heading.

"We're heading into a twenty-four shift, Evan," Bobby speaks warmly, "We'd feel better if you stayed."

Buck slips off his shoes, "I'll stay."

Athena shoots a smile in Bobby's direction, "There should be some pajamas for you in the drawers, the second row down," She instructs, "Your toothbrush is in the medicine cabinet."

"Thank you," Evan skips up the stairs, "Goodnight."

***

The following morning, Buck is woken by his seasonal allergies.

He's survived a truck explosion, a pulmonary embolism, and a tsunami, but hayfever still sucks.

He snags an antihistamine from their medicine cabinet and creeps into the kitchen, careful not to make any noise.

May's left for work - there's a note on the table explaining that she'll be late home as she's checking out her new apartment with Michael.

Buck's downing his second glass of water when Athena steps out of her bedroom, "Buck?" She questions, "You're up early."

Evan rubs his eyes, "Allergies."

Athena rests a hand on his back as she opens the fridge door, "You need an antihistamine?" He asks, "May's a sufferer too, so we're stocked up."

"I took one," He smiles - uncertain, "Sorry, I didn't ask."

Athena fixes him with her parental glare as she tuts with a laugh, "Evan, you don't have to ask," She assures, "This is your home too."

Evan stares at her, mouth dropping open, "Thanks."

His mother's words ring in his head; You're under our roof, Evan, so you have to respect our rules.

Growing up, his parents never once referred to their house as his home.

Athena pats his arm, "Come on, you're helping me with breakfast."

"Of course," He claps his hands together, "Where do you need me?"

***

Being called 'Evan' again by those he trusts is second nature, almost like things have never been any different.

Buck struggles to see the floor as he heads into May's new apartment, box in his arms, "Hey, May," He calls, "This box isn't labeled."

She rolls her eyes, "It is, but Dad covered it with tape," She tries to peel the corners off, "Again."

Michael defends, "I'm cautious."

"And I'll be spending the next two weeks trying to cut free my possessions," May taunts; she taps the top of the box, "Bedroom."

Buck nods, "Gotcha."

She smiles, "Thanks, Ev."

Warmth spreads over Evan's chest, he smiles, hanging his head; well and truly caught up in the euphoria of acceptance.

His pseudo-sister was the first to try 'Ev.'

It works. Buck loves it.

"Buck, can you help me in the kitchen when you're done?" Athena calls, "I'm gonna your help with these latches."

"Sure!" He places the box on the floor and turns into the kitchen.

Chimney, who is in the middle of constructing a bookshelf with David, turns, "Oh no, brace yourself," He taunts, "Fire Marshall Buckley is back!"

Buck remains straight-faced, "Ha."

"Why do I need these, Mom?" May quizzes, "I'm not a kid."

"We have around ten thousand earthquakes a year," Evan explains; he grabs the latches, "Things get broken. This is an added safety," He points to the windows, "Especially this high up."

May narrows her eyes, "So, what I'm hearing is that this was your idea, not Mom's?"

Buck nods, "I suggested it."

Athena squeezes his shoulder, "I accepted the suggestion."

May bops her head, "Oh, I see."

"Buck's got an eye for safety," Bobby praises.

Eddie walks in with May's ironing board, "Which is saying something."

Buck glares, "You're so funny."

Michael walks over, "Thank you, Evan," He says, all actively ignoring Eddie and Chimney's mischievous laughter, "Earthquakes aren't a thing I considered."

"You're not gonna remember everything," Evan holds up the latches, "If you want, I could set some of these up at your place."

"That would be wonderful."

Athena sports a fond smile, "It's like having our own personal handyman."

Buck jokes, "Well, if that's the case, you can all pay me."

***

Buck lays on his front, across Maddie and Chimney's carpeted ground, his eyes fixed on his niece.

She's busy chomping down on one of her many toys, but she stares at him with her wide brown eyes, fixated on his face, much like he is on hers.

Sometimes, even thirteen months into her life, he can't believe that his sister, and one of his closest friends, came together to make a human being.

"How can somebody be this cute?"

Maddie steps over, "Oh my, God," She laughs fondly, "She's covered in drool."

"That's fine," Buck gathers a cloth, wiping it over Jee's face, "She's still adorable, aren't you?"

Jee-Yun throws her hands in the air, "Yeah!"

"Yeah," Evan repeats, bopping her nose.

"Should I be worried about you two?" Maddie asks, sitting on the couch, "You're gonna be partners in crime."

"Just wait until we join forces with Christopher," He scoops his niece onto his knee, "It will be over for all of you."

"What is it about you, Evan?" Maddie asks, "The way she looks at you - the way everybody looks at you, it's like-"

He asks, curious, "Like what?"

"I don't know," She tilts her head, "Like you're the key to the mysteries of the universe."

He barks a laugh, "Maybe, I am."

Maddie grabs her book from the coffee table, "Chim thinks you're a trained hypnotist."

"No comment."

Maddie throws her head back with a laugh.

Buck turns to Jee, "Where's my nose?"

She reaches up, grabbing his nose.

"That's right!" He praises, "You're a genius."

Jee-Yun blabbers, "Ev-an!"

Maddie sits bolt upright, "Did she just?"

Jee-Yun knows a couple of words - Ma, Dada, No, Yes, but she's hasn't ventured any further.

Jee-Yun swings her arms around, "Evan!"

Oh, and he melts, a delighted cry catching in his throat.

His teary eyes meet Maddie's.

Every time someone utters his given name, Evan is one step closer to the light.

With Jee-Yun's soft squeal, he's out - the darkness now, a distant memory.

"Yes," He holds her up, "That's me!"

***

By Halloween, Evan barely notices the change - it goes to show how fantastic his family is.

He fishes out the insides of a pumpkin, humming 'This is Halloween' under his breath.

Hen's amused look bores into him.

He shakes his hands, "This is fun."

"How?" She laughs, "I once had my hand inside a man's chest, and somehow, this is worse."

Buck reclines his head with a laugh; he grabs a cloth, drying his hands.

"Hey, Evan!" Chimney sings from downstairs, "I need you and your abnormal height!"

"Again?!" Buck hollers back, not dropping his grin, "Chim, this is borderline exploitation!"

Hen bows her head, chuckling.

Buck hears the ladder being pulled out.

Hen raises her eyebrows, "You better go, Buck, or we'll be taking him to the emergency room."

"Oh," Buck runs, "Stop it, Chim, I'm coming!"

***

Buck's definition of a perfect weekend is spending it with the Diaz Boys - teasing Eddie endlessly and sneaking treats with Christopher, even though they both know that Eddie sees what they're doing.

Evan was apprehensive when Eddie suggested they took a trip to the carnival - rollercoasters, and crowds - reminded him too much of the calm before the tsunami.

He agrees to go - 'exposure therapy,' Eddie calls it, and Buck knows he's right.

It's okay, and they have a ton of fun.

Buck wins one too many prizes for Christopher, which Eddie ends up carrying, along with Christopher's crutches, but he doesn't complain.

It's easy to understand why Christopher wants to hold Buck's hand - he remembers the day at the Pier, too.

Knowing that the ocean is an hour away helps because at least that's not a natural disaster that could stop them in their tracks.

Thanks to the pandemic restrictions, there are fewer people, which eases the pressure further.

Sunset was almost two hours ago, and Christopher keeps yawning in-between words.

Without a second thought, Buck kneels, holding out his hands, "Here we go, buddy."

Christopher shuffles forward, tucking his face against Evan's shoulder.

Buck gathers him, letting Christopher tangle his legs around his middle before getting up, "There we go, I've got you."

Eddie smiles fondly, "We should head back to the car."

"Yeah," Buck sings, patting Christopher's back, "Which way is it?"

Eddie points, "That way, I think," He darts his head around, "Hopefully."

Buck snorts a laugh, "We'll find it, eventually."

Christopher is ten, he usually doesn't like being carried around anymore, but he settles in Buck's grasp, content.

Buck fears the day that they won't be able to scoop him up - he knows that anxiety is doubled, in Eddie's case.

"You okay with him?" Eddie whispers.

"Of course," Buck grins, "I'm legal guardian material."

Eddie scoffs a laugh, shaking his head.

"He's getting taller recently," Buck comments, "It's insane."

"Usually what happens with kids, Buck," Eddie teases.

"Ha, ha," Buck replies, monotone.

"Dad, Buck...." Christopher shushes, "I'm sleeping," He mutters.

Eddie bits his lip to conceal a laugh, "Sorry, bud."

"We'll keep it down," Buck adds, tapping his back.

Christopher tightens his arms around Evan, his head lulling on his shoulder.

"You okay there, bud?" Buck asks.

"Yeah," Christopher breaths sleepily, "You're comfy."

"Well, thank you."

Christopher goes quiet, and for a moment, Buck thinks he's fallen asleep, but then he speaks, "Love you, Evan."

Evan's breath catches sharply; he tightens his grasp, "Love you too, kid."

His family, Buck can't quite believe his luck - they're perfect, in every sense of the word.

***

Unfortunately, not every use of his given name comes at a happy time, but that would be beside the point.

'Buck,' 'Evan,' and even 'Buckaroo,' - they need to be used, freely, no matter the time of the day or what is happening. It helps; it means that he can't associate any of them with a particular emotion or trauma.

Evan scouts the roof of a decrepit apartment complex - that is, according to dispatch, set for demolition, but they've received calls about somebody being trapped on the top floor.

Time hasn't been kind to the structure, narrowing their time for a search and rescue.

So, starting from the roof and working down seems like the best bet.

Buck steps towards the door, the foundation creaks, dangerously loud under his foot.

He grabs Hen's low-hanging wrist as the roof gives way below them.

He doesn't remember what happens next.

With the dangerous nature of their jobs - Evan's name and all the possible variations are often uttered in worry.

He blurts awake with desperate rapid breaths; every ache and pain catches up with his concussed mind, "Hen?"

Hen's panicked voice cautions, "Buck don't move!"

The light is low, but he can see, despite the abundance of dust particles.

His back rests against debris; he can tell by the throbbing pain in his biceps that he didn't land in the position he was in, more likely manhandled into place.

He doesn't want to consider the time that Hen spent alone, waiting for him to wake, "Hen," He repeats - desperate.

"I'm here."

He lifts his head, "Are you hurt?"

She crawls into view, hauling her gear along with her, "I'm fine," She promises.

He traces his eyes over her - she's got a couple of scratches, but nothing too worrying, "We both fell?" He asks, confused.

"Yeah," She seems guilty, "But I was lucky."

"Why?"

She presses her fingers to his pulse point, "I had a soft landing."

"Yeah?"

"You."

"Oh," He laughs at the absurdity, "I'm an excellent crash mat."

She glares, "That's not funny."

"It kind of is," He offers her his dopiest smile, "Glad I saved you."

"Thank you," She kisses his forehead, "Now, stay awake."

His eyelids are heavy, "What about the victim?"

"Dead," She sighs.

Buck changes the subject, "What's wrong with me?"

"Broken arm," She lists, "Some blunt force trauma, and—" Her throat cracks; she can't say it.

"And?"

"Ruptured spleen," She sniffles, "I think."

Buck mutters, small, "Oh, that's not good."

She grips his hand, "All you've gotta do is stay awake, okay?"

He tries, but his eyes are heavy.

"Evan," She grabs his chin, "Please don't close your eyes."

"Hen."

"You're not dying on me," She orders, "I won't let you."

He smiles, weak, "Okay."

"I'm right here," She vows, "I'm not going anywhere."

He praises, "You're gonna be a great doctor."

"I know," She tells him, "You don't need to tell me that now, though."

"I have to, just—"

"Zip it, Buckaroo," She snaps lovingly, "We're getting out of here, you hear me? You're gonna help plan my surprise party when I graduate, and then we're gonna get drunk together."

"I'd like that."

She presses their foreheads together, "Just stay awake."

"I will."

***

Buck knows he's far too comfortable in hospitals; he is familiar with the staff and can easily snag an extra pudding at mealtimes, thanks to an older nurse who first treated him following his emergency tracheotomy and had on every subsequent visit.

Still, despite the laughs he has, he can't wait to escape - back to normality.

He folds his LAFD hoodie when Eddie swings inside, hand grasping the doorframe, "You ready?"

Buck turns his head, "Did you grab my meds?" He asks.

Eddie holds up a clear bag, "Right here."

"Thanks."

Eddie steps inside to place the medication into Buck's backpack; he then takes over, zipping up the bag.

Evan hums a laugh, "I can do that, you know?"

"I know," Eddie prods Buck's shoulder, "But we wouldn't want you to throw your stitches."

Buck perches on the bed, "Hen would kill me."

"Hen would kill us," Eddie corrects, "Mainly me."

Evan snorts, "Why?"

"I'm in charge of keeping you in line, apparently," He chuckles.

Buck hangs his head as he laughs, rubbing at the nape of his neck.

Eddie's tone turns sincere, "Are you alright?"

Buck's okay - really. The pain medication is doing its job, and he barely feels the ache in his side - what's on his mind is more complicated than that.

Eddie grips his shoulder, "Buck?" He fixes him with a concerned glance, "What's going on?"

He shrugs, "It's complicated."

Eddie sits, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I almost died," Buck lets go of a breathless laugh, "Again."

Eddie holds a hand in front of his face, failing miserably to hide a grin.

Buck's eyes widen, "What's so funny?"

"Sorry," He moves his hand away, "Just déjà vu - but last time, this was the other way around."

"It was," Buck confirms - the conversation is falling in the direction he needs it to go, "When you told me about your attorney and Christopher, I was scared. I never thought that anybody would trust me as much as you do; Christopher is your life, your everything, and I'm just me."

"You're you," Eddie repeats, softly stern, "That's why I made the decision."

Buck's shoulders sag, "I know."

"You fight for what you believe in, Buck, and you've never once stopped fighting for him," Eddie starts, "You almost killed yourself trying to find him during the tsunami," He takes a breath, "Hen told me about the well collapse; how one of the only words they could get out of you was Christopher's name. Your concern for him became your priority, even when he wasn't in any danger. I knew, then, that it was you because if I had died that day, you would have been taken away from each other, and that wouldn't have been right."

Evan's world would fall apart without Eddie, so would Christopher's - at least together, they'd have somebody to cling onto.

"If I die on this job," Eddie continues, "I'll die knowing that you two have each other."

Tears glisten in Buck's eyes, "So, that's why you changed your will."

"Yeah."

Buck settles his hands on his rocking knees.

Eddie questions, "Is there something else?"

Evan nods deliberately, "When I get hurt, Maddie can get a little short with me."

"She's afraid of losing you."

"Of course," Buck fidgets, locking his fingers together, "Maddie's lost too much. She's already had to stand by, watch our brother die, and live with the fallout. The decisions my parents made when they had me."

Eddie hisses, "Buck—"

"I know, I am wanted," He assures, "By her, by you, by the team - but this isn't about that."

Eddie's expression relaxes, glad that he doesn't have to lecture Buck on his importance again.

"It's just," Buck sighs, "Maddie latches to those she loves, and she can't let go - I wouldn't want to put her in a place where that is her only option."

Eddie brow furrows, "I'm not following."

"I'm going to make an amendment to my living will," Buck concludes, the space between each breath grows shorter.

"What amendment?"

He lowers his head, "I'm going to give you power of attorney."

Eddie's face softens, "Oh."

"Maddie has it right now," Buck scratches at his cheek, "But I've spoken to her about changing it."

Eddie's eyes widen, "You have?"

Evan nods, "It was my parents before, but they don't know me, well enough, to make the right decisions, but you do - and I know that you'd be strong enough to make them."

"Evan," Eddie meets his gaze, "I can do that, for you," He vows, "And, I understand not wanting Maddie to make those decisions, but what about Bobby?"

"I thought of Bobby, but then I remember—"

Eddie realizes, "His kids." Bobby is one of the strongest men they know, but if he was ever faced with the decision to take Buck off life support, he'd crumble under the weight of it all.

"I know this is big and that these decisions would hurt you," Evan croaks, "But I have faith that you could make them."

"I could," He confirms, "Evan, if I die, you become my son's legal guardian, and I'm sure that wasn't easy for you to process because yes, I trust you, but in that scenario, I'm dead," He lifts his shoulders in a shrug, "If you could do that, I can do this."

Evan leans, gathering his friend in his arms, "Thank you," He whispers, gripping tight, "For everything."

[meridiansdominoes]

How To Scrap Battledroids

(I have decided to make this its own post entirely, so here it is! Read it on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24424678)

Prompt:  Anakin and The Boys make a skillshare about how to scrap battledroids but about halfway through Tup makes a hair routine class, then other troopers post their hobbies and basically thats how they win the public over to support the clones

______________________________________________________________

“Alright, ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the first instalment of ‘Reasons Why the 501st is the Best Battalion in the GAR’, subtitled ‘How To Scrap Battledroids’, sponsored by the Hero With No Fear himself, General Anakin Skywalker!”

General Skywalker steps into frame with a cocky smirk. The camera trails from his face down his arm to where he’s holding his lightsaber with a sure grip. 

“Today we’ll be demonstrating some of the most effective ways to absolutely demolish the B1 battle droid,” the narrator continues. The camera turns slowly, revealing several clones all around the Jedi, armed to the teeth and waiting. “The B1 battle droid, also referred to as a standard battle droid or a clanker, is the most widely used battle droid manufactured by Baktoid Combat Automata and Baktoid Armor Workshop. They’re the successor to the OOM-series battle droids. Early versions of the model required the use of a—”

“Holy kriff no one cares, Echo!” one of the clones says loudly. The narrator lets out an offended huff. The camera jerks and spins so that General Skywalker comes back into frame. The Jedi looks amused.

“Some of our viewers might appreciate a little background, Fives, shut up!”

“Force, can we get to it already? All this waiting around is driving me crazy!”

“Hardcase, calm down, exposition is important—”

“So is getting my weekly dose of adrenaline, Jesse—!”

“Okay, alright,” another clone soothes. “General, we’re waiting for your signal.”

“Thank you, Tup,” General Skywalker says, and ignites his lightsaber. “For that, I think you deserve the honor of going first.” This spurs a cacophony of groans from the others, but Tup makes a delighted sound. “Alright, on my signal. Echo, you’re in charge of making sure it all gets on camera, understand?”

“Yessir,” Echo says smartly. He pivots so that the entire group is visible—one Jedi and four clones, tense and waiting behind some sort of structure. 

“Alright, let’s go!” General Skywalker shouts, and they charge around the corner and take the platoon of battle droids that had been approaching by complete surprise. 

It’s possibly the most unfair fight the GAR has ever seen. It’s impossible for Echo to keep up with all the action. Hardcase’s Z-6 whines as it tears the droids apart. Tup and Jesse are dodging enemy blaster bolts and returning fire with fluid ease. General Skywalker is a storm of blue light and sparking clanker parts. At one point the Jedi reaches out his hand and sends Fives and Tup flying through the air with the Force so that they can attack from above. 

The fight is over in less than two minutes. It had been pure chaos, and utter destruction. The clones regroup around Echo, riled up and excited as General Skywalker comes within earshot of the camera again.

“And that,” General Skywalker says, sheathing his lightsaber with a flourish, “is how to take down a battle droid, 501st style. It doesn’t get any better than that.”

______________________________________________________________

“Ladies and gentlemen, if you’ve constantly been wondering, “Boy, who could possibly be better than those 501st imbeciles that showed up on the holonet a few weeks ago?” like I have recently, look no further! What takes six of the 501st’s best only takes two of the 212th!” 

“Boil, less talking, more not-dying!” someone shouts, and there’s a large explosion. The camera shakes uncontrollably for a moment, and then suddenly it steadies, half of the camera obscured by the rock that the cameraman is crouched behind. Regardless, General Obi-Wan Kenobi and Commander Cody are visible, back to back in the middle of a courtyard absolutely swarming with droids. 

“Kenobi deflects blasterbolts from every side, and oh there’s the Commander, headshots, every one of ‘em, look at the way they kriffin’ move! So in-sync, they turn together, no hesitation at all—!”

“Boil, quit the commentary and get down!”

There’s another explosion. Boil lets out a grunt of annoyance. The camera whirls. 

“Come on, I’m missing the best part!” There’s a flash of orange and white, and then Boil gets the camera back up. The droids are attempting to close in on the two combatants, but General Kenobi slashes and whirls with ethereal grace. Commander Cody lashes out with powerful kicks that shatter the droids at the joints. They’re absolutely surrounded by sparking droid parts, untouched in their little circle of safety. When there are only a few droids left, General Kenobi slashes his last opponent cleanly in half before tossing his lightsaber oh-so-casually to Commander Cody The Commander catches it out of midair without even glancing at it and beheads the very last droid with a lazy flick of his wrist. 

Boil whistles, long and low. He’s not the only one. 

“And that’s how to destroy a battle droid, 212th style,” Boil whispers gleefully as General Kenobi and Commander Cody motion for their troops to advance. “And it really doesn’t get any better than that. Suck it, 501st!”

______________________________________________________________

Captain Rex looks extremely annoyed. 

“Since the 212th really seems to think the galaxy of themselves, this is Captain Rex of the 501st, and I’m here to show you all what it really means to destroy a battle droid.”

Behind the camera, someone giggles. Commander Tano’s hand appears in the frame as she gives him a thumbs up. He shoves his helmet on and draws both DC-17s, checking them over briefly before stepping out of cover directly in front of the platoon of battle droids, determined and completely alone. He charges, pistols already releasing a steady hailfire at his opponents. 

The battle droids don’t even stand a chance. They scream and cower and attempt to escape, but it doesn’t do them any good. Commander Tano laughs so hard that the camera shakes in her hand. 

______________________________________________________________

“You know, I think that normal B1 battle droids are getting pretty old,” Commander Cody says, smirking at the camera—there’s something a bit dangerous in the expression, almost predatory. Daring their next challenger to try and top them. “So this time we’re upping our game. Super Battle Droids aren’t nearly as easy to take down as B1s, which means we have to get a bit creative.”

By ‘get creative’, Commander Cody means ‘use lots of explosives’. It’s very impressive.

______________________________________________________________

“Oh kriffing—are you serious, General?” Commander Bly makes an unamused face at the camera.

“Of course, Commander. We can’t let the 501st and the 212th have all the fun, can we?” General Secura says in amusement, the tip of one blue lek sliding into frame for an instant. “Besides, we’ve got something much better than battle droids to destroy today, don’t we?”

Bly snorts.

“The Armored Assault Tank does take a significantly larger amount of effort than any battle droid can. So are we skipping droidekas, then? I don’t think anyone’s done them yet. They seem like a more logical next step up from SBDs to me.”

“Someone else can do that,” another clone chimes in, sounding a bit excited. “Go big or go home, right General?”

“Very good,” General Secura praises. She sounds pleased. “Trooper, please explain the weak spots of the tank to our audience as Commander Bly and I take care of those two on the ridge. It shouldn’t take us long. It’s a bit far—you might have to zoom in, but it should still be plenty visible.”

“Yes sir,” a trooper agrees happily as she passes him the camera. “Don’t worry, sir. I’m sure this’ll blow the rest of the videos completely out of the water.”

General Secura grins at her Commander. She shrugs one shoulder at him and pulls her lightsaber from her belt as she turns to face the tanks. Bly’s expression softens into something that definitely isn’t meant to be seen by the camera. Then he shoves on his helmet and raises his weapon to stand at her side.

“Alright, General. Lead the way.”

______________________________________________________________

“You know, these videos aren’t just to show people how easy the Seppie droids are to blow up,” Tup says with a shrug. “You can do other stuff too, you know. Dogma, the comb please!”

Dogma dutifully passes him the comb. Tup releases his hair from the bun. It falls down around his face, far nicer than it should considering the amount of time it spends mashed underneath Tup’s bucket. Tup begins to run the comb through his hair, grimacing slightly as he carefully works out knots.

“Alright, everyone is always asking me how I keep my hair so well-maintained with the GAR’s very limited hair products. Today I’m gonna let everyone in on a couple of my most prized secrets…”

______________________________________________________________

“I absolutely will not.”

“But sir,” Comet says (his voice trembles because he’s trying to keep from laughing), “You’re the best at it! The rest of us don’t even come close!” He moves the camera a little closer to Wolffe’s face.

“I don’t give a kriff,” Wolffe deadpans. He goes back to scrolling through his datapad. Comet swipes it from his hand and passes it to Sinker as Wolffe lunges for it, who passes it back to Boost, who tucks it behind his back. Wolffe levels a ferocious glare at them. All three of them cower for a moment until Comet finds his voice again.

“Siiiirrrrr. Sir, please.”

“No.”

“Then you’re not getting your datapad back,” Boost attempts bravely. Wolffe rolls his eye. 

“What’s stopping me from just taking it from you, Sergeant?” he counters. Boost licks his lips nervously.

“I mean, it would still be just as good of a video if you did,” Sinker says, snickering. “How To Discipline your Unruly Sergeant.”

“Just once, sir!” Comet begs, focused on their original goal. “We’ll stop bothering you if you do!”

“For how long?” Wolffe asks gruffly. Comet considers. 

“Until the next deployment, sir?”

Wolffe sighs.

“Fine. But only once.”

He tips his head back and lets out a long, inhuman howl. It’s wild and fierce and absolutely terrifying. It calls warriors to the hunt, triggers something carnal in the blood of the pack. The sound echoes through the room. In the corner of the frame, Sinker bares his teeth in response. The reaction is seemingly instinctive. 

When it finally ends, Wolffe drops his chin and lifts one eyebrow at his audience. 

“Satisfied?” he huffs. Boost passes him back his datapad with a dazed grin.

“Sithspit, sir. That was… better than usual. Trying to… impress someone, maybe?”

“Get out of my office,” Wolffe growls, on the defensive. “Get that camera out of my face, or I’ll have you running laps in the gym until your brains melt out of your skulls.”

“But sir! Now you have to explain how you did it! That’s what these videos are technically for after all!”

Wolffe loses his patience. He lunges. The camera gets swung around until everything is a blur. There’s a flash of grey, a hint of white, a snarl. Comet lets out an embarrassing shriek. The video cuts to black a moment later.

______________________________________________________________

General Windu is weaponless and surrounded, but that doesn’t stop him from utterly decimating every clone that gets within five feet of him. No one can even touch him. He dodges their attacks like he already knows their every move. He probably does. He flows and shifts like water around their attempts to take him down, even when they team up and pull out all the stops. Commander Ponds, hands steady as he films, chuckles mercilessly whenever General Windu successfully tosses someone aside. 

“There’s not really anything to explain here, we just wanted to demonstrate how cool our Jedi is. Mace can take on half the battalion bare handed and he barely even breaks a sweat.”

“Commander, are you actually going to help us or are you just going to sit there and watch us suffer?” a shiny yelps, two seconds before he gets his feet swept out from under him and goes down with a curse. Ponds laughs again. 

“No thanks, kid. I learned the hard way that what you’re trying to do is impossible.”

“Maybe you just never tried hard enough, sir,” Stak grits out, shoving the staggering shiny towards the edge of the mat. He charges Windu head on. It looks foolish until Ponds spots Razor coming in from behind the Jedi. He’s moving as silently as possible. Ponds shifts the camera accordingly so that all three of them are in frame. 

For half a second, it looks like General Windu won’t be able to block both of them.

Well, it appears that way. General Windu ducks low, twists so that he gets right into Stak’s personal space. Stak tries to grab him, but General Windu just uses his momentum to whirl him around and send him crashing into Razor. Their helmets clunk together with a hollow sound. They go down hard.

The onlookers cheer in excitement. General Windu has the smallest of smirks on his face as he settles back into a fighting stance and waits for the rest of the clones to make a move. 

“And that’s why our Jedi is the best,” Ponds says smugly. The next ten minutes of the video is General Windu successfully incapacitating the rest of his challengers. 

(The video is well-received by the general public but poorly received by the rest of the GAR.)

(“Respectfully, the 212th would like to submit this video to demonstrate why General Kenobi is actually the best—”)

(”The entire 91st can go kriff themselves, watch General Skywalker hijack these STAPs  in midair and you’ll know that the 501st obviously has the best Jedi—”)

(“The 327th resents everything that the 91st’s most recent video claimed and declares that Ponds has no kriffing idea what he’s talking about, General Secura is obviously a better choice, here are ten reasons why—”)

(“General Plo Koon can fight in space. I don’t see General Windu doing that, here are the clips from the 104th’s most recent zero-grav drills—”)

______________________________________________________________

When Commander Fox steps into the room, the men have the decency to look sheepish. Fox takes everything in slowly—the camera in Byte’s hand, the way Thorn and Thire are standing together shoulder to shoulder, hiding the failed project behind them, the scattered nuts and bolts all over the floor. The multitool in Stone’s hand. He drags one hand down his face and takes a deep breath. 

“You told me it was an emergency, Thorn.”

“It is an emergency, Fox! Listen, we even brought you caf because we knew you’d be annoyed,” he holds the steaming cup up as he speaks in a desperate attempt to make peace, “and there’s no way we’re going to figure this out ourselves!”

Fox plucks the caf out of Thorn’s hand and sighs again.

“What is it, then?”

“Well…” Thire drawls slowly. Fox narrows his eyes impatiently. 

“What the kriff is so important and difficult that three of my fellow officers couldn’t figure it out on their own?”

“To be fair, sir,” Stone says good-naturedly, “it’s far more difficult than we thought it would be.”

Thire and Thorn step away to reveal… a piece of furniture. A bench, only halfway assembled, innocent looking enough. Fox stares at it blankly for a few moments. Byte zooms in on his face enthusiastically. 

“We were going to demonstrate how to make it, for the video thing that half the GAR seems to be doing right now,” Thorn explains weakly. “But… it’s confusing. There’s even instructions but they don’t really help.”

Fox drains the cup of caf. He squares his shoulders. 

“Force save me. Are you kidding? Give me the kriffing instructions. This is ridiculous.”

(It takes them two more hours to get the bench set up. Fox misses a meeting. Byte edits the final video to include the bulk of the angry tirades and all of the snark. Public relations improve to an all-time high almost overnight.)

______________________________________________________________

(“The clones are not people. They are soldiers created for a single purpose,” some of the Senate attempt to protest. This argument does not last long, mostly because the civilians who have been eagerly following the videos that the clones have been releasing over the course of several months start to riot in protest. 

Padme Amidala and Bail Organa take great pleasure in bringing the videos before the Senate to prove to them that the clones are indeed soldiers but also individuals who laugh and cry and live just as any other citizen of the Republic does.

In the wake of the unshakable evidence and the rioting, there is little the opposition can do to stop the Clone Rights Bill from being passed, and the entire Republic celebrates.)

[bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture]

Alright, chapter 8! And man is there a lot to talk about here. I don’t really have any pre-content things to say, so we’ll just hop right into it today!

[No. 8 - Rage, You Damned Nerd]

I swear, this first page has a LOT to talk about on it, so I’ll go from panel to panel and do some rambling thoughts on each segment. 

First off, UA doesn’t actually handle the costumes the kids get! It’s support companies affiliated with the school that does - which makes sense, since the school has to focus on teaching their support students before letting them get their hands on actual costumes that these kids might be fighting in.

I mean, they seem to be allowed to practice on like, minor support stuff (read: Mei making Izuku his new gloves post-Nighteye or somewhere around there) but not full costuming, which is… actually a bit reassuring? But also explains some of the lag time in getting costume repairs / upgrades since they’re probably busy companies. It also explains why there probably aren’t major alterations to any costumes besides between the summer and winter variants, since it would be time-consuming to remake these costumes so regularly.

(It still doesn’t excuse some of the costumes the kids got, but that’s more on the whole ‘eye candy’ thing for readers than actual practicality, so whatever.)

(Also, I can’t get over the fact that Snipe has a support company. Fucking Snipe. Guess we know another canon or likely-canon Support teacher.)

Next we get a preview of what the kids sent in for specifications for their costumes:

We get a bit of insight into a few of the characters - as background stuff, we get Shouji, Mineta, Aoyama, and Sato. Mineta got pretty dunked on for char design and costuming, and Aoyama’s costume almost looks like a magical girl outfit like this, which honest to god would have been fantastic to see him in. More interesting (at least to me) are the other three: Ochako, Tenya, and Katsuki.

Ochako first, because that pressure point thing is interesting, and I dunno how often those actually come up in fics besides a passing mention, like. What if her support bracelets / neck piece broke during training / a mission / whatever? Would she suddenly have to fight through the nausea? By the point of current canon (War Arc) she’s probably trained enough that she doesn’t need them as much, but man, it could be an interesting little thing to explore, like, post-Kamino.

Tenya is a bit surprising, since we know he comes from a well-off hero family. Logically, this was before the whole Hosu / Ingenium plotline was really developed, so Tenya didn’t have that to fall back on, or it could be argued that the support company that Ingenium is associated with also works with UA. Alternatively, it could be that either Tenya didn’t want to rely on his family (which seems silly when they’d know how to work with his quirk best) or UA is very firm on ALL costume stuff going through them…

But then again, Katsuki. Oh god, Katsuki. What fucking support company looked at this kid and went ‘yeah we should give him a way to store more explosives AND give him bombs’ and just. Did so. Why did UA not vet that. Maybe the support company didn’t realize how strong his explosions were without the gear, but UA, man, I just. I suppose they had no way of knowing how reckless he’d be with them, but honestly, after the battle trials, they should have been fucking yoinked from him so damned fast. 

Anyways, onto other parts of Katsuki’s costume, we see he’s a fucking dork. Possibly what lowered their guard. ‘Something scary’ and ‘Dynamighte all over’. What the hell, kid. At least your designer stuck close to your design… including the huge-ass clunky gauntlets. Man, the Musketeer Trio movie poster ones are so much better looking and so, so streamlined. Works of art, they are.

Moving on, we get a bit of a flashback to ~three weeks ago, which by the calendar would be around March 20th? So a few weeks after the Entrance Exam. And Izuku is only NOW getting around to updating the quirk registry? Izuku baby seriously, how the FUCK did none of the UA staff notice the ‘quirkless’ on your application form at any point before this?

But yeah, he’s worried about his registry, so he calls Toshinori, who explains the update process. It gives the example of someone who might alter their stuff with updated information, with one or two allowed - though major ones aren’t accepted. Toshinori then says it’ll probably be okay since he started with nothing, then tries to correct himself to ‘definitely’, only to get cut off because Izuku accidentally hangs up in a panic when Inko calls out that she’s home. Haha poor Toshinori, and poor Izuku, the two anxious dumbasses. 

Anyways, moving on from that is Inko showing off the jumpsuit she made, with Izuku surprised. She admits it’s not the coolest, but she based it off of the design in his notebook (the one we saw back in chapter 1). She tells him she regrets giving up on him back then, and how he never quit regardless of her faith. She apologizes and says from there on she’ll be cheering him on with all she’s got. 

Izuku’s narration notes that it’s a symbol of his mom’s love, and that he couldn’t wear anything else, even if it’s not ‘efficient’ or ‘cutting edge’. (Or even at all decent looking.) And it’s also hinted through the present thoughts on it that it’s meant to be an homage to All Might (the smile and the hair pieces) which is just such a dorky thing.

We get to the wide-spread of hero costumes, which- wait a second.

That’s Momo’s initial hero costume design???? Why did Hori not stay with that??? It’s a LOT better than the stuff we’ve seen her in later! Like, sure, it’d still be improved with the main opening being her stomach and not her chest, but this still looks like actual human clothing and not a sexy Halloween costume variant of her hero uniform. Fucking hell, now I’m even more mad.

Tsuyu’s costume meets the approval of the discord server as basically ‘no changes needed’ asides from maybe the goggles being a bit bulky.

Tenya’s costume, I’m sorry, I know it’s an homage to your brother / family, but were the additional pipes really needed? Also, the helmet isn’t a bad idea since he goes fast, and bugs in the mouth/teeth have to suck, but it just looks so damned Gundam-y I can’t help but laugh a little.

Shouto… nah, too easy a target.

Aoyama is Aoyama. I’m actually a bit disappointed now that it’s not a magical girl costume, but alas, I suppose even Hori couldn’t be that brave.

Kaminari… I forgot he had that headset thingy. 

Don’t really have much else to say about anyone else, so let’s move on.

Izuku bugs out a bit about Ochako’s costume/appearance, while she compliments his more practical looks and laments not being specific, saying it’s a bit too puffy and curvy for her. Which means it’s more the accessories which seem to be her issue with it over the main costume itself? Huh.

Anyways, after All Might confirms they’re all there, he notices Izuku’s headpieces, which are a match to his costume, and has to turn to muffle a laugh for how obvious a reference it is. Tenya steps up, asking whether they’ll be doing cityscape maneuvers again since it’s the same field used in the entrance exam. Izuku thinks to himself how cool Tenya’s costume is, while All Might explains that they’re moving onto step two - indoor anti-personnel battle training!

He explains what while villain battles are most commonly seen outdoors, statistically the worst crimes and villains are more likely to be found indoors. Confinement, house arrest, black market deals… the clever villains luck indoors to avoid heroes. Which is why the class will be split into teams of two and pit against each other, heroes versus villains style!

Ah, Tsuyu. Calling him right the heck out, as expected. All Might then notes that in this scenario, the fight won’t be against disposable robots. 

This entire page is just fucking hilarious. The class and all their questions while All Might is shaking with nerves. The fucking cheat sheet he uses to try to get back on track. Him being questioned on the lot drawing, and shaking while Izuku accidentally ends up covering for him. I just. All Might was not prepared for this mess and it shows. He was doing so much better when it was the one on one stuff with Izuku.

But yeah, Izuku notes the scenario is like from a western comic plot, and he’s also the one who ‘realizes’ the lots are like when heroes from different agencies have to team up for emergencies without prior warning. 

Lots are drawn, and we have our teams:

Izuku’s so stressed out because he still can’t really talk to her, while she’s excited to be teamed up and calls it ‘fate’ that it happened. All Might draws the first two teams to participate, and… team Izuku and Ochako (as the heroes) versus team Katsuki and Tenya (as the villains). Both Izuku and Katsuki are alert from this development…

Which makes this a good point to cut off, since it’s halfway through and we got a lot of information to chew on already. Second part should be out this weekend (hopefully). 

[sockori]

The Akatsuki But. Pokémon (2)

Not trainers, not preexisting Pokémon- but Pokémon themselves. I mean, Kishimoto’s original plan for them was to all be monsters- so why not reimagine them as pocket monsters?

(Notes:

- Covers Kakuzu, Hidan, Kisame, Itachi, Sasori, and Deidara.

- See Part 1′s notes. )

Kakuzu

(The Zombie Pokémon)

(The Ragdoll Pokémon)

Type: Dark/Ghost

(Dark fits the greed aspect, Ghost fits his transformation.)

Abilities (1): Cursed Body “May disable a move used on the Pokémon.”

Hidden Ability: Heart Harvest “Steals the stat changes of the Pokémon it takes out.”

(Can only happen once. If multiple faints by a spread move, the first Pokémon that faints gets stolen from.)

General Stats: Largely set on Attack and Defense; rounded everywhere else, with slightly higher HP Stat.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

A story told: wronged by those it once trusted, this outraged Pokémon stole the hearts of its superiors, literally- transforming itself into a horrifying beast of immortality. It takes the appearance of a ragdoll, a form made of loosely stitched up parts, its core a mass of strange, elusive black threads.

It holds a reputation for taking other’s wealth, eliminating powerful Pokémon and trainers to steal their riches, hoarding the treasures in an unknown location. Because of this, many have desired to capture it to become rich themselves- though, such a daunting task has, so far, only resulted in many... unfortunate disappearances.

Mega Evolution

Type: Dark/Ghost

Mega Ability: Mold Breaker

“Moves can be used on the target regardless of its Abilities.”

(still not sure on a Mega Ability- resorted to this one.)

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

The Pokémon’s entangled core bursts forth, rapidly expanding the physical form into a terrifying mass of threads. It rapidly repairs the body, quickly stitching back up the parts it loses along the way, though the effort is not exactly permanent.

The rapid physical transformation reveals strange masks on the Pokémon’s back, each a heart of the superiors it once trusted long ago. These strange creatures aid Kakuzu in masterfully performing Fire, Water, Electric and Flying type attacks, despite not having priority.

Hidan

(The Cult Pokémon)

(The Voodoo Doll Pokémon)

Type: Dark/Fighting

Abilities (1): Reckless

“Powers up moves that have recoil damage.”

Hidden Ability: Justified

“Boosts the Attack stat when it's hit by a Dark-type move.” 

General Stats: Very high Attack Stat, with moderate speed and slight but relative bulk.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

A wild, cultish Pokémon with no desire for pacifism, it eliminated the peaceful village it came from in the name of violence. Hidan now roams the surrounding region in search of blood, looking for people to sacrifice in the name of a paranormal beast known as Jashin.

Hidan possesses strange power in immortality, able to suffer great injury, even severing, without a care in the world- perhaps even enjoying it. It shares bonds in immortality with Kakuzu, another Pokémon with similar zombie-like qualities.

Mega Evolution

Type: Dark/Fighting

Mega Ability: Cursed Blood

“This Pokémon, upon fainting, takes the opponent down with it.”

(Guaranteed Destiny Bond.)

General Stats: Equal Boosts to Attack, Speed, and Defense. 

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

It draws a strange symbol below its feet, activating an inner dark, arcane power, the sheer aura tainting its skin with a skeleton-like pattern. It can now pass its suffering to others if it so desires, making it a living voodoo doll of sorts.

Fueled by cultish energy, its newfound abilities in pain splitting give it the wild desire to maim in the name of Jashin. It tortures opponents it ensnares in its odd circle, passing on each injury, howling with nefarious laughter all the while.  

Kisame

(The Shark Pokémon)

(The Swordsmen Pokémon)

Type: Water

Abilities (1): Rough Skin

“Inflicts damage to the attacker on contact.”

Hidden Ability: Shark Skin

“Inflict additional damage on the opponent when making contact.”

(Attaches Rough Skin to contact moves.)

General Stats: Emphasis on Attack and HP. Slow but bulky, with relatively high defenses. 

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

Losing its faith in the world, it lost the desire to stay in the Mist region, now affiliating itself with the mysterious Pokémon of the Rain. Despite its large, intimidating appearance and thirst for combat, this Shark Pokémon is actually relatively docile, intensely loyal to those it gains trust for.

Kisame possesses one of the legendary Seven Swords- a scaly-skinned, sentient weapon known to absorb the power of anyone it pleases. The bond Kisame holds with this weapon is strong, perhaps even affectionate, giving the strange creature poffins after battles.

Mega Evolution

Type: Water

Mega Ability: Dry Skin

“Restores HP in rain or when hit by Water-type moves. Reduces HP in harsh sunlight, and increases the damage received from Fire-type moves.”

(casually puts skin abilities on Kisame)

Stat Boosts: Trades out its bulk for offensive power, with crazy high Attack and Speed, but lower defenses.  

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

It fuses itself with the legendary Sword, inheriting its regenerative abilities, transforming into a large, more shark-like beast. It captures opponents with its strong jaws, dragging them under the surface without mercy.

Now fused with the legendary Sword, it fights with every last effort against its opponent. Its strange loyalty compels it to fight, willing to exert everything for those it trusts- even if it means sacrificing itself.

Itachi

(The Illusive Pokémon)

(The Optical Pokémon)

Type: Psychic/Fire

Abilities (1): Illusion

“Comes out disguised as the Pokémon in the party's last spot.”

Hidden Ability: Illusive World

“It traps the foe in illusions whilst they’re confused, reducing their HP.”

(Bad Dreams but different. Tsukuyomi would be Dark Void for Confusion.)

General Stats: Highest in Special Attack, good in Attack and Speed. HP is moderate, Defenses are low.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

The legendary Pokémon known as the Uchiha were wiped out in a single night by the mysterious Itachi for reasons of testing strength- or so many assume. It now walks outside of the Leaf region, refusing to walk its home grounds once again, though sightings of the Illusive Pokémon inside its borders persist anyway...

It is infamously known as The Optical Pokémon, for its strange changing eyes that are said to stare directly into the soul. It channels Psychic energy into them, generating life-like and sometimes horrific illusions on its opponents- though, doing so further wears down its eyesight.

Mega Evolution

Type: Psychic/Dark

Mega Ability: Susanoo Armor

“The Pokémon’s stats are dramatically increased (3.5x), though it reduces its HP (1/6) every turn.”

(a unique ability, but not signature- as obviously the other Uchihas can have it as well. The HP reducing sucks but without it would be absolutely broken)

(Susanoo Armor is the Mega Evolution stats boost.)

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

A gigantic armored spirit appears, enveloping the Pokémon in a virtually indestructible armor. However, this armor also dramatically strains the Pokémon, inciting excruciating pain the longer it continues.

Due to the drawbacks of the armor, this Mega Evolution is relatively short-lived. Despite this, it spreads mass destruction, able to topple a nation in just one swing of its sword.

Deidara

(The Explosive Pokémon)

(The Transient Pokémon)

Type: Ground/Rock | Ground/Fire (I’ll let you choose.)

Abilities (1): Flame Body

“Contact with this Pokémon may burn the attacker.”

Hidden Ability: Firecracker

“Gives priority to bomb/ball moves.” 

General Stats: Great Sp. Attack and Speed. Moderate everywhere else; slight advantage in Attack.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

An intense Pokémon with a taste for art, it searches the region for inspiration- and destruction. Championing the art of “Transient Beauty”, it takes pleasure in bombing and setting fire to anything it finds pleasing, typically without any regards to who may be there.

The odd mouths on Deidara’s body churn up fiery power into clay, giving it an unusually explosive quality. This Explosive Pokémon regularly uses its mouths to create destructive clay creatures; they follow its every will, dutifully guiding themselves into their target like missiles.

Mega Evolution

Type: Ground/Dragon

Mega Ability: Transient Art

“Powers up Bomb/Ball moves by 40%.”

(Yeah he gets two unique abilities. What Of It)

Stat Boosts: Both offensive stats and speed stats boosted. Minor boosts here and there.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2): 

Deidara churns up an intense amount of clay, forming a massive, strange white creature in the shape of a dragon. It churns out explosive attacks on the opponent in rapid succession, taking a notch off of its tail in the process.

Creating a giant clay dragon, Deidara hops onto its back and hovers into the air. It proudly proclaims its Transient Art from above, raining down a series of bombs on the opponent- and whoever else is in the area.

Sasori

(The Scorpion Pokémon)

(The Eternal Pokémon)

Type: Poison

Abilities (2): 

Poison Touch “Coming into contact with this Pokémon may cause poisoning.”

Battle Armor “Hard armor protects the Pokémon from critical hits.” (In reference to Hiruko.)

Hidden Ability: Contaminated  

“All contact moves this Pokémon uses gains a 45% chance to poison the opponent.” (Contact moves that already have a chance to Poison get boosted by the same amount.)

General Stats: High Attack and Speed Stat. Slight emphasis on the defenses, moderate everywhere else.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2):

Unfortunate events turned this Pokémon toward inhumane reason. Fascinated with “Eternal Beauty”, Sasori performed an unknown technique that altered its appearance with semi-immortality. The specifics of this strange transformation remain undiscovered.

This poisonous Pokémon roams the sandy dunes, stealing items and trainers for its grizzly fascinations. It is said that the poison it excretes is so powerful, not even a basic Antidote can cure it. Unlucky victims undergo three agonizing days before meeting their fate.

Mega Evolution

Type: Poison / Steel

Mega Ability: Merciless

“The Pokémon's attacks become critical hits if the target is poisoned.”

General Stats: Massive increase to Attack and Speed. Loses some of its bulk in the process, but its relatively minor.

Pokédex Entries (1, 2):

The Pokémon takes off its cloak, revealing the secrets of its transformation- an intricate puppet body. It uses its sharpened blades and deadly poisons to cut through waves of opponents. It is merciless in its outrage, sparing no sympathy for those it targets.

A wide-eyed, empty stare is plastered over the face of this now revealed puppet. This Pokémon believes it is sparing the foe it poisoned by fainting it swiftly and powerfully- it spares no mercy for those it shreds.

[miaicefyre]

My headcannon

Juane washes Oscars wounds

“C’mon. Let’s get you cleaned up”

They sat in the giant Shnee bathroom, his coat hung on a peg outside, his boots sat just beside the door so he was down to just his top and trousers.

He nodded “Mm’kay”

At first Oscar had protested against the idea, saying they’d only been given an hour and they shouldn’t waste time on him, but given they had some explaining to do anyway...he agreed so long they agreed to listen to what Emerald had to say.

Jaune went over to the bath and set the tap running, testing the temperature then looked back at Oscar in time to see him wince trying to take his top off. Jaune felt a rush of sympathy and regret looking at him. Beneath the scorched fabric, the burn was red-raw, and angry dent in the boys chest. He wandered if it would ever fully heal. While his aura-amp had fixed up most of his ribs, the bruises still seemed to be there. At the time, he’d just focused on getting Oscar back on his feat after the explosion. He honestly hadn’t had much aura left himself after there run in with Salam. and even where there weren’t bruises, patches of dust and dirt had still managed to seep through his coat. He really did need this bath.

Leaving the tap on slow fill, Jaune took the discarded shirt and opened the door just enough to try and hang it on the same leg as the coat. Someone would come for them later, he knew. Weather it was Wiess, Cline or even mrs. Shnee, he felt sure they’d have some clean clothes by the time they were done.

When he looked back, he found Oscar leaning over the edge of the tub, with his hands on its edge. He looked as though he was finding it somewhat difficult to get in, his arms and legs shaking slightly. Jaune went to help, giving him something to lean on while lowering himself gently into the slowly expanding stretch of water. He suddenly realised it wasn’t just a wash he needed, but rest as well.

He still had those bandages he always wore on his neck but when Jaune took them off he noticed some old scars across his throat. “How long have you had those?”

Oscar raised a hand to the scars, as if he’d only just remembered they were there. “About a decade.”

Jaune took up a sponge, squeezed it full of water and gently rubbed the boys shoulder. “You never told anyone about them.”

He shrugged. “No one ever asked.”

He decided to drop the subject, and not to mention it to anyone else either.

Neither of them said anything else until Jaune got his wrist and a reflex caused Oscar to wince and pull away.

“Sorry.” Jaune said “does that hurt?”

“Only a little.”

He could see why. Thin markings were clearly visible all down his wrist. When he started on his other shoulder and noticed similar markings on his other wrist, the realisation struck him. “Did they tie your hands?”

“Only when it was him.” Oscar stifled a chuckle. “I don’t think she really saw me as much of a threat...but she didn’t wanna take any chances with him.

All of a sudden, his feelings of anger towards Ozpin mixed with his feelings of responsibility for Oscar and he found himself feeling bad for the old man.

“Hold still.” With the softer side of the sponge, he dabbed at the blood by the corner of his mouth, only mildly surprised to see the cut underneath had completely healed. “Sounds like he had it pretty ruff...did take all of it though, did he.”

Oscar didn’t bother asking how he knew that. “No. But that was because I didn’t want him too. He wasn’t gonna force it. Not again.”

Momentarily confused, Jaune let the sponge fall. “Why? Why wouldn’t you want him to?” He realised just a second too late how mean that question actually sounded but Oscar didn��t seem to mind.

“I didn’t want them to know he was ready there. Otherwise, it would’ve been worse...was, worse.” He looked at the markings on his wrists. Once again, Jaune felt a pang of sympathy for Ozpin.

Filling a jug full of water, Jaune said “head back.” And Oscar did so, letting the water wash though his hair to drop back into the tub. It was getting dirtier now but they were almost done. “Your very brave.” Juane told Oscar, running his fingers through his wet hair. “You always have been...but that was kinda foolish.”

Once more, he saw the boy holding back a laugh. “It was him she really wanted...and I wasn’t gonna give her what she wanted.” Juane could help but smile too at that, but then it quickly faded when he realised “but you did in the end.”

Up till then, Oscars eyes had been closed but now he opened them. “Yeah.” He lowered his gaze to the slowly dirtying water.

“Hay.” Abandoning both jug and sponge, Juane put a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t be ashamed. You held up for as long as you could. And...in a way I-I’m glad Oz was there for you...to take hits when, you no longer could.”

That didn’t seem to help much. Oscar lowered his head, his eyes becoming hidden in the dripping locks of his hair. Juane sighed, letting the subject simmer for a while. He would realise in time.

They kept quiet until Juane turned his attention to the scar on Oscars chest. He didn’t want to risk touching it, for fear it would just cause more pain, so he just placed the sponge just above it and pressed it there, causing the water to run down the wound. Even that cause the boy to wince and suck in his breath in pain.

“Shh, this want take a sec.” Jaune tried to reassure him.

Hoping the boy wouldn’t notice, he also tried a bit of his aura amp again but, not to much of his surprise, it didn’t seem to make it any better.

That just left the bruises over his ribs. The water had risen to just below his chest by now, meaning those bruises were partly submerged. This made it a little harder to see them but easier to get them clean.

“Did Hazel do this to you?” Jaune asked, rubbing the bruises away, careful not to press to hard.

“Most of it.” Oscar told him, nodding.

“It doesn’t make sense.” Juane said “Why would he suddenly go from beating your ass to saving it?”

For a moment, Oscar started to look a little smug. “Cause even while he was doing that, I was tryn’a get him to turn...make him see what he was doing was wrong.”

“And how did you manage that in the end?”

“Simple. I told him the truth.”

But before he could ask any more questions, there was a knock on the bathroom door.

Getting up, Jaune turned off the tap and went to see who it was.

It turned out to be Wiess, holding a pile of clean clothes. “Freshly washed.” She says, handing them to him

That was bloody quick

“We’re waiting in the dinning room when your done.”

Jaune took the cloths. “Thanks. We should be out in a minute.”

When he closed the door and looked back, he saw Oscar was laying back in the water, his arms outstretched above him, as if he were examining something on his hands. The marks on his wrist were still there but they were much less visible then before. You had to actually be looking for them and even then to be pretty up close to be able to spot them.

He looked up when Jaune took a towel from the rail and came towards him. Crouching down, he let Oscar put an arm around his shoulders in order to help him out of the tub and Wrapped the towel around his shoulders.

“There.” Juane told him. “That didn’t take to long.”

Meanwhile

“What did you do to him?!”

Emerald stood pouting in a corner while the others looked at her accusingly. “I never touched the boy. I barely even saw him. It was mostly Hazels job to...try and get him to talk.”

“But why...what was she wanted to know?”

Emerald shrugged. “Probably a few things. All I know is that at that moment, she has the lamp but didn’t know how to use it.”

Blake nodded. “So that’s why she needed Oscar.”

There was a pause for a while.

“Did he?” Yang asked, unable to take the silence much longer. “Did he tell her?”

Emerald shook her head. “But I...sometimes a-I could hear it...all the hits...and the screams.” She closed her eyes and looked away. “It was horrifying...listing to him cry out like that”

Was she actually feeling sorry for him?

“But you didn’t try to stop it!”

She actually laughed. “How could I? Then it would’ve been me on the receiving end. They tortured him...beating him until he wept but...he never gave in. I kind of admired that.” She looked up to where Jaune had taken Oscar to get cleaned up. “He’s a brave boy.”

There were looks of shock and sympathy all around. Ruby in particular looked close to tears.

“But wait.” Yang realised “he said Ozpin took the torture for him.”

That seemed to stump Em for a second. “I wandered about that too when I heard cause...I’m pretty sure it was the boy to begin with. Even though it wasn’t really him she wanted...that was the other thing she thought the torture would do. Try and draw the old man out. And I guess it worked in the end but I-I honestly couldn’t tell the difference.”

But that just caused them to ask more questions.

“Why would he want to keep control while going through that?”

“Because I think he knew. If she knew Ozpin was really still there, it would’ve been harder on both of them. He knew that.”

“Well then why would he end up giving it to him in the end.”

Em shrugged again. “I don’t know, I guess it just became too much.” Then when they all just looked her blankly. “Look, I’m not gonna pretend I knew what was going on in that head of his, But if I had to guess, I’d say when we were all brought to the bridge to watch the whale land on atlas, it was him in control then.”

“So you did see him.”

“That was the first time I saw him. Being dragged from that cell it...it looked like he could barely walk.”

Two things happened one after the other: Ruby stifled a sob and the door opened to reveal Wiess coming in. Thanks that later, no one seemed to notice Ruby.

“They say there almost done.” Weiss told the others, referring to Jaune and Oscar. She glared at Emerald as she passed but said nothing.

“Good, cause we really need to talk about things.”

Maybe he’d be able to validate Emeralds claims but they had other problems.

It was a another few minutes until they came in. He still looked a little pale but at least he was clean. Yang moved towards him but he waved her away. “I’ll be fine, don’t fuss.”

He stopped just in front of Emerald. “They treating you alright?” He muttered to her.

She nodded vaguely.

He went to stand my the window...

Let’s be real, it probably didn’t actually happen like this but it still would’ve been nice to see how Oscar went from beaten and tattered to clean and fresh.