bluestiches · 2 years ago
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Had a dream yesterday when I was taking a nap & in my nap I was having a dream, in the dream I was falling asleep & my cat was sleeping on my chest.Before my cat came to me she was hanging out w/ stoners and had some weed in her fur or something and so I was getting stoned while falling asleep…..then I woke up from my dream.
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thatlesbeanjew · 2 months ago
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Telling my coworker bestie about Epic: The Musical
Me: “it’s based on the Odyssey and the story of Odysseus-“
Bestie: “Wait, is that the guy that falls in love with his mom?”
Me, chokes: “N O ! No! That’s Oedipus!”
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waverlyyhaught · 5 days ago
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Favorite Marta and Fina Moments - Part 97 Sueños de Libertad
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corpusdiem-seizethedead · 4 months ago
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Charlie: Angel is smiling, did something happen?
Angel: What? I can’t smile just ‘cause I feel like it?
Husk: Valentino tripped and fell in the parking lot.
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several-ravens · 5 months ago
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horror podcast:
me: what's the worst you can do, claustrophobia? go on, i'm not scared
horror podcast: *someone yelling and slamming the table in anger*
me: ok i apologise
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dmsr-art · 25 days ago
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HELP MEEEEE MEGALOPOLIS WAS THE WORST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN. the aubrey plaza scene was hot tho. the baby should have flown away on the carpet at the end aladdin style
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minniiaa · 9 months ago
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Firm believer Law and Luffy have the loudest sex. Luffy gives no fucks about privacy or holding back. Law tries so hard to be quiet cause he’d rather launch himself into the sea than have anyone hear him getting railed. This drives Luffy insane so he just pushes Law until he turns into the whiny little bottom bitch he truly is (Law loves it but he’d never dare admit it).
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leupagus · 4 months ago
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Heads up, guys: feel how you like about this election, but if you call Biden senile or make your funny, funny jokes about sundowning, I’m not going to forget that. Or forgive it. Ever.
I watched Alzheimer's wash away the person I loved the most in the whole world, my father who was the kindest and sweetest man both before and during his destruction—because that's what the disease does, it destroys. There's no "battle" or "struggle;" it's simply slow theft of yourself.
When you make light of that—especially when you insist that you're "not" making light of it, that you "really think" ol' Joe is losing it, no really!—you tell me that all you see in my father's death is the chance to mock.
So fine, do that. But not around me.
(made this post over on bluesky first, but it applies here too)
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hal-o-ween · 6 months ago
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Sweet Dreams <3
#my art#pokemon#galarian ponyta#digital art#hiiii everyone hello please look at my darling angel Amalthea. shes my partner pokemon in pokednd <3#most of our pokemon went missing so Mia (my character) took our remaining pokemon to get their pictures taken in case they go missing#i did in fact draw all three of them. am going to work on doing digital versions of the other two#its all of our partner pokemons :3 ponyta. impidimp. and mankey <3#the sketches i did for the other two are so fun i cant wait to draw them#impidimp's made my cousins all laugh so hard they almost cried#this session was so fun and we also talked afterwards about pokemon we may want on our teams in the future#and honestly my potential line up for Mia feels so good#her next pokemon she gets is very possibly going to be a bewear. absolutely out of left field choice but it works so beautifully#im also thinking good options for her would be breloom. grumpig. wyrdeer. maybe mimikyu.#grumpig and breloom are honestly the top of the list. they suit her so beautifully#wyrdeer is also really good. mimikyu would be up to roleplay#mimikyu and bewear would both play into her animal handling skill#mimikyu would also end up disguised as a sylveon#probably play that as mimikyu wanting to fit in with Mia's team since she's really nice to it and it wants her to be its trainer#bewear on the other hand would 1. work well aesthetically for her and 2. would be fantastic roleplay material what with it being a giant#aggro bear and mia is just this gentle giant who is so fucking good with pokemon so its like well.#the nice girl wants me to be nice so i wont kill you because i like her. she gives me snacks and pets me and treats me well
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moonyswarmsweaters · 5 months ago
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Marauders era as things me and my friends said- part 3
*see a straight couple making out*
Evan : Ew can they not?
Barty:Dude!
Evan: What?
Pandora: That’s rude
Evan: I’m not being a hater
Evan: just hetrophobic
Dorcas: Actually, Valid
Regulus: Like, they can do that but why push that in our faces?
Evan: So rude
*continues eating chips*
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theabigailthorn · 1 year ago
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Shadowheart and Nocturne sure seem like to be good friends
yup, just two gal pals, hanging out, doing each other's hair in a secret back room, Platonically, fighting alongside one another, writing in diaries about one another, just as friends, sharing memories, as friends though
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sadquickchristmassnowman · 11 months ago
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just in class, being completely normal when my professor clicks to the next slide in her presetation and
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wait a damn minute.
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THE CAST OF THE 2009 NBC SITCOM COMMUNITY??? what are they doing in the middle of a presentation about culturally responsible music pedagogy 🤨🤨🤨
(read like that one neil gaiman falafel tiktok audio)
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tothechaos · 7 months ago
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in "anecdotes that sound entirely made up," this evening i was at dress rehearsal for the show im in, the importance of being earnest. i was in the dressing room and one of the costume assistants fainted. i caught her and was asking her if she was alright, if she knew where she was, etc. the uh. unfortunate part is that i was asking her entirely in character, which includes a british accent. imagine if you will, fainting, and when you come to, a man dressed as a mid 19th century woman is asking you if youre alright in a british accent. i think i would faint again
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starheirxero · 1 year ago
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Y’all know when you hyperfixate on something hard enough that it bleeds into your every day life? yeah. yeah
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plutonium-sky · 6 months ago
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How To Accidentally Kill A Vegetable
featured @locallygrowndaikon
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quasi-normalcy · 10 months ago
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Do you ever just become overwhelmingly cognizant of the existence of evil in the world?
Like, not as a cute, devil-emoji 😈 i'm-so-naughty-i-steal-chocolate-cake-and-do-weird-sex-acts thing, nor still as a melodramatic, comic-bookish, high-absorptivity-black-fabric, soon-my-death-ray-will-destroy-Metropolis thing, but like.
Actual Evil, as a force that is real and immanent in the world.
Just pointless cruelty inflicted pointlessly by one human being upon another because they've forgotten how to be kind. Just entire systems and machinery of state and ideology brought to bear on the problem of annihilating human lives and maximizing human suffering so that small men can feel powerful. Just humans who have through trauma or conditioning or propaganda shut off their ability to see other humans as fundamentally like them.
Anyways, I joke on here a lot. I get angry on here a lot. They're both just scabs to hide my horror and my despair at the condition of humanity.
Your regularly scheduled programming will return shortly.
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