#I’m really pleased with this considering I’ve been fighting a head cold all day

[autumnblooms]

Quick Aeon sketch tonight~

[oksana-moods]

All Too Well

Summary: Natasha tried to mend what's left broken. Because no matter what, she's the love of your life and she knows all too well.

A/N: It's been forever. This 5k piece felt like I was writing 300k, it was difficult, funny, hard and I miss doing this more often. I hope you guys like it and please, it be amazing for me to know your thoughts about it.

You can read it as One Too Many part 2 or as a single piece, it is up to you.

Warnings: Mentions of blood, torture, mentions of death, alcohol, angst (you know how I am, I can't simply write people kissing without suffering before).

"Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place"

The gun pointing at your face barely meters away should be intimidating, but at this point no one would blame you for not caring anymore. And you didn’t even mean the last couple of days, no, your whole life had been a fight, a struggle, an act of survival after another, so the last few days were nothing but the same blur.

The gunpower inundated your nostrils and the pungent smell masqueraded the smell of blood that clung to your brain and you were sure you wouldn’t erase it even if you got out of your current establishment.

Your heightened senses were capable of decerning all the different blood samples available in your cell: yours and from other occupants that came before you, or the blood that belonged to some of your kidnappers, who’ve learned in the worst possible way that you were not to be underestimated.

Back to the gun, the man behind it kept enchanting the same questions and you wondered how long it would take for them to get tired of your silence or mock replies. A sharp pain in the back of your head made you look up to meet his eyes, another man behind you was forcefully pulling your hair down to force your head up and you were already tired of him doing this.

“Where are the others?” The man with the gun asked, patience waning thin. Good to know you were on the same page. “Where is Romanoff?”

A blooded grin made its way to your face after you spat on his shoe. “It’s funny you think I’ll tell you now after all you’ve put me through. Do you think I’m afraid of your bullet?” And you didn’t even mean the fact that you probably wouldn’t die if he decided to shoot anywhere else other than your head, but you did mean that you were not afraid of dying.

Actually, you were so tired that perhaps laying down cold wouldn’t be unwelcomed. There wouldn’t be any pain, your body wouldn’t try to heal only to get hurt again. You thought it would be refreshing.

Two steps and the man pressed the gun over your knee, and you already knew, his wicked grin grew wider when your body convulsed with pain even though you concealed your scream in muffled grunts by biting your lips so tide you tasted your own blood, again.

“Why don’t you make it easier for you? You tell me what I’ve asked, and I kill you fast.” He pulled a chair and got comfortable for he knew all too well you wouldn’t budge easy. “I promise you. One silver bullet in your temple. Fast. Easy.”

Your eyes flashed to his. Silver bullets were really affective against your healing skills and very few possessed this knowledge. Someone must’ve tipped him off and the idea stung way much more than the powder burning the flesh inside your knee.

Only two women knew your weakness. Well, your creators knew, of course, but they were not in condition of speaking anymore. Unless someone from this organization was capable of going to hell to have a chat and then return to the living world with this intel.

Your love for Yelena was something so natural and it grew so fast for she was just deranged as you were: uncapable of functioning as what people labeled as normal. You were kindred souls and you felt like you were twins separated somewhere along the road and considering both of your past, who actually knew?

After long nights during long missions, you confided in her this. You were scared of losing control because sometimes the beast inside you took over and your brain couldn’t always sway the instincts. So you handed her one silver bullet in case things went south, she was adamant in returning it to you but you asked her to keep it, for insurance.

And the other person was Natasha. You never knew how she learned this but when she recruited you many, many years ago she already knew. If the pain in your leg wasn’t so overwhelming, you could’ve laughed at the memory engulfing your mind’s eye.

Her tide catsuit adorned with nothing but her black widow symbol, swaying her hips and pretending she wasn’t scared of the woman seated in front of her. You remember how her fear smelled, a stark contrast to her pose. You recall her words, her smile, her flirtatious play all to convince you to use your skills to her so called greater good.

And before leaving, she boldly closed the distance between you and placed a silver bullet in your hand. You understood the message. You weren’t stupid. Later she sworn that she was the only one, at S.H.I.E.L.D. or within Avengers, to know your weakness and you believed her.

And this belief comes back to bite you in the ass.

Because you knew full well that Yelena would die, she would kill herself even, before telling someone your secret. But Natasha? You didn’t trust her anymore. She had done it before, and you knew it all too well. If you were to be honest, after one too many treasons, you didn’t care about another.

Or so you told yourself.

“Good luck.” You rasped out after a long time inside your own head.

The man tilted his head to the side and smiled that smile that told you he already knew what you would say. You would go further and say he was eager for it. “I think in the torture manual says I should tell you that I don’t enjoy this, but I’d be lying. We actually bet how long it will take for you to drop the act and start screaming.”

You bet no one thought it would be that fast. He stumped a knife down your thigh so fast and so hard you saw stars. You could feel the silver poisoning the skin and muscle where it was nested, and it burned like nothing else would.

Unfortunately for them, the apex in you was not used to be a prey and this injury was powerful enough to make your survival instincts kick in. It happened so fast it was a haze, one minute he was laughing, the other he was on the ground - lifeless, and just as the others came, they followed their leader – well, who you thought the leader was, at least.

Funnily, your countdown was wrong, or you were not the only one putting your captors down. As the blood ran free down your leg, your strength and capability of keeping fighting diminished. When a body collided with yours, it was a miracle you were still awake.

Her red hair framed her face perfectly, skin white as snow and her green orbs looked like there was an aurora borealis looking down at you as she nested you in her lap as you felt life slipping through your fingers - veins.

“Hey, hey. Stay with me.” Her voice was strange, as if speaking was a struggle and she reeked fear, but not the same you were used to, as if she was feeling a different type of fear, it was a strange concept, but you hated it, nonetheless. If these were your last moments breathing, you wanted her true smell. The one you knew all too well.

“Please, don’t you dare die. I’ve got you.” Her muffled words found your ear, but it was hard to even comprehend anything at all when her lips felt so cold in your forehead. “Heal. Why are you not healing?”

“Silver.” It was all you could say. It was all you had to say.

She frantically started yelling at someone, perhaps the comms, but before you could close your eyes for good, you saw a red blur and he was complaining about your weight.

Her giggle filled the room as the first sun lights announced the day had just begun, you looked at her alarmed, for it was definitely something new. “Are you mocking me?” Enable to conceal a smile yourself.

“I’m not.” She denied, but her laugh told you differently. Her freckles painted her angelical face and her eyes looked like they held the sun captive. And you. And she knew, all too well. “It’s just I can’t believe you still have this scar.”

Her index finger traced said scar as she looked at you expectantly, waiting for your explanation, even though she already knew.

“I didn’t know Wanda’s necklace was made of silver, okay.” You finally replied, pulling her close to you as if her weight meant nothing, right in that moment this action felt so normal, so homely that it ached. “I thought I could take it from that heated place for her, but it burned me as I did. It was silly.”

She giggled again, though muffled by your shoulder this time, there was something new in her eyes that you couldn’t quite pinpoint. “It was cute. Silly, but cute. That necklace belonged to her mother.”

“I know.” You were locked in her eyes, and she stared at you as if she was trying to reach your soul, then you felt her fingertip leaving the palm of your hand to intertwine your fingers as she let her eyes stray to look at both of your hands.

The feeling was overwhelming. You were aware of how fast your heart was beating, you could only hope she couldn’t feel or hear it, for in that moment, all you wanted was to engrave the sight of you, together, and you wish you could just have this forever. Have her forever.

“I’ve never felt this before.” Her brows were furrowed in a way that made you upset, but you wouldn’t let go of her hand for nothing in this world, even if it was to soothe the crinkles in her forehead. “I’m in love with you.”

For a moment, there was nothing that you could do but wait for your brain to register her words and meaning, for a whole minute you simply stared at her, trying to search for a catch or a joke but you found none. And she looked up at you so innocently that you found yourself believing in her.

“I thought-.” You tried, but she never let you finish your sentence.

“I know what I said.” She stopped you midsentence, but her voice was not stern, it was almost tired. “This is not what I feel anymore.” Again, her eyes found yours and the way they shone made your knees weak, luckily you were laying on her mattress.

Somehow, they conveyed so much of this feeling she had claimed she was not capable of nurturing that your stomach did somersaults. And right in that moment, you realized that perhaps silver could hurt you, but this woman was your true weakness.

Specially if she’s looking at you the way she was.

“You already know how I feel about you.” You whispered, it was terrifying saying again the three words that you were sure would make her fly away from this strange arrangement you found yourself in. Yet she didn’t.

“I know.” She confirmed after a while admiring your eyes as if she could read your mind. After deciding she was content with whatever she found, she leaned in and pecked your lips so tenderly it hurt.

Then, when she looked at you again you saw, from the small smirk growing in her lips, that she had gone back to play her prime character: the Black Widow.

“Let’s have a breakfast before the funeral, shall we?” As she got of the bad, you copied her movements going back to your own suitcase to find something comfortable as her voice broke the silence filling the room. “I never asked how you and Sharon became friends to the point you’d come to a funeral of her relative.”

The cleanliness of the room was the first thing you were aware of. In fact, you didn’t even realize you were awake, therefore alive, before the smell hit your nostrils. And with it, her scent.

The occasional up and down from her feet and bouncing leg was the only sound in the room except for the noise coming from the heart monitor over your head. She was anxious, that much was obvious even if you weren’t an enhanced being.

Mentally searching for your injuries and pain, you understood that whatever had happened with you, was all gone. Excluding the lingering pain in some specific places that you credited to silver induced wounds that would take way much more time to wear off.

However, considering the state you were in, whoever tended these wounds had operated a true miracle.

As you opened your eyes, you half expected bright lights, common to these hospital rooms to hurt your eyes, but you soon identified that the only source of light was a yellow bulb close to the door.

Natasha.

“Thanks for working the lights down.” You rasped out and stifled a giggle as she jumped from her chair by the wall and bolted to your bed side. The book previously nested between her hands now long forgotten on the floor.

The iron grip which she clutched your hand didn’t go amiss to you. “A week.” The sadness in her eyes was palpable. “A whole week blacked out.” She explained further but you didn’t need to know the details of how long you were sleeping or how many times your heart stopped at surgery.

“You scared the shit out of me.” Then it hit you, the same type of fear your nose caught when she found you in that facility, it was fear but not the one someone feels when they’re actively facing danger, but it was fear for someone else. Fear of losing someone.

Something stirred inside your heart, but it was something that you couldn’t dwell much longer, not, at least, in that moment.

“They had me, after you sent me as scout.” Your tone was flat, and her eyes widened a little at the bluntness of your accusation, though you were far from settling for little. “They knew about the silver.”

Her hold faltered, but your hand was still snuggled between hers. “What are you accusing me of?” She narrowed her eyes, but her green orbs were bright even in the poor light.

“Cynicism doesn’t suit you the way you think it does.” Before you could even pull back your hand, she completely let it go and got to her feet. “Look at my eyes and tell me that you actually didn’t let them get me, just to find their hideout.”

She had her back turned to you, acutely avoiding your gaze. “Look at me!” You demanded and she had the gall to look at you through her lashes, as if her seductive skills could help her now. You wouldn’t fall for that, and she knew it all too well.

“It wasn’t my intention for you to be captured and I never thought someone else would know about your weakness. I thought I was the only one alive to know.” She finally turned to you, eyes now darting around the floor as if it could grant her the answers she sought.

“Lena knows too.” You corrected her, but if she was surprised by your update, she never showed.

Shaking her head right to left as if to deny such possibility, she exclaimed. “She’d never do this to you.” It was funny that at least in this matter you agreed. “I think she loves you more than she loves me.” A sly smile escaped her lips and you had to restrain your heart from fluttering at the sight of it.

“I was waiting for your check-in. I went to your assigned coordinates, and I know I underestimated their numbers, but I would never let someone capture you.” Her feet dragged her back close to your bed but maintained some distance between you.

“It wouldn’t be the first time.” You shot back without missing a single beat, crossing your arms around your chest.

She sighed tiredly and looked down at the floor. You wouldn’t let her forget that she was the main cause for you to be locked in the Raft, well, her and your support for Steve when Ross tried to shove the Sokovian Accords down your throat, and solely because you shared his point of view.

After being controlled for most of your life by a group with shady intentions, you swore you’d never submit your loyalty and services to a third party again, even if it was a government group – specially a government group, actually, so only over your dead body you’d accept the Accords.

But when you came back to see if Natasha was fine, she had gone without thinking that you were left behind and in the care of Ross to be taken to the Raft with the others, without sparing a single thought to you.

“I’d never ever willingly put you in danger.” She said taking another step closer to you. “I have never mentioned to anyone about your secret, and I purposefully kept it out of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s files.”

Her eyes kept darting from her hands to your eyes, never focusing, never staying too long. “Look, I know Yelena would never speak about it, but I wouldn’t either. And I didn’t, you must believe me!”

“I must?” Your eyebrows shot up so high so fast it hurt. “Well, you made it pretty damn hard for me to believe, don’t you think, Nat?” Your tone was hard, but you were not even speaking too loud.

Somehow, Natasha thought this hurt way much more.

“C’mon all I feel for you-” She tried to counter, but you wanted to swallow the lump stuck in your throat trying to choke you, so you cut her midsentence.

“Words, Natasha.” She found herself locked within your burning eyes. “I kept you as an oath, yet you hid me like another dirty secret. And all you’ve felt you kept hidden – buried – just as who you really are.”

After years thinking about how she lured and how she hurt you, you thought that maybe spatting what your relationship really was – a hidden lust, would make you feel better, would free yourself from her hold, but it didn’t.

After all, calling her unfair wouldn’t change how lonely she made you feel, how she took your happiness away whenever she drew herself back to her main character as she left you daydreaming about imaginary scenarios built in “what ifs”.

As your words found her ears, they settled heavily in her stomach. She knew she had massed up, she had hurt you many times, yet all she wanted was go back in time and erase all her wrongs and all the times she promised and never delivered.

She didn’t possess a time stone, though. There was nothing she could do about the past, however, she knew she couldn’t run from her mistakes anymore. If she wanted to start anew, she’d have to show she was different.

She wanted to, no, she needed you to understand that she was a whole new person because you’ve changed her. She didn’t want to hide anymore and for that she’d have to let go of her walls and be vulnerable. Truly vulnerable.

Funnily, she had played with her vulnerability before, being vulnerable just enough for people to lower their shields or masks so she could get what she wanted but this was something else entirely.

This time she wouldn’t act. She’d be vulnerable, at your mercy hoping she’d make it out alive on the other side. It was something new and it scared her, but losing you was scarier.

“I didn’t know you came back to check on Barton…” She tried weakly, knowing that this was a sore subject for the both of you. Each with your own views and reasons.

“I helped Clint, yes, but we went back looking for you. Yet, Ross was all we’ve found.” Your glare was cold, perhaps colder than ever. In the pit of her stomach, she knew she deserved it, she just wish you could move on with it.

“I was wrong, okay. Is that what you want to hear?” She snapped, though her voice was still in a low tone, eyes sad. And you hated it. “I’m sorry for leaving. I’m sorry for not going after you that day at the airport or at the Raft.”

Her eyes fell once more to your hands, she slowly nursed them in hers and this action was so soft, so hesitantly as if she was afraid of you taking it away; afraid of you shutting her down once more.

“I wish I could do things differently, but I can’t, and for that I’m sorry. But I- I wish we could try move on from this. I still have feelings for you.” As words flowed through her tongue, you watched as eyes portrayed a sincerity that you rarely saw within those forest green orbs.

Usually, they hid her true feelings or performed like an actress twisting her truths mixed with pieces of lies and characters she created through life until she herself was unaware of what was true or not.

“I hear you, Natasha.” You rasped out after a long moment lost inside her beautiful eyes. “You speak of things as you did before, yet you never act on it.”

Her hands were warm, a muted invitation to go back to your dreams of having a life with her. The only person who never showed any sign of fear about your nature, that never once treated you like an animal.

She never treated you like a woman either.

“I want you to show me.” Your stone-cold eyes punctuated your feelings in the matter at hand. If she wanted to have you back, she’d have to show you she’s changed for words could only take her so far.

“I will.” She vowed and smiled softly, though her heart was shattering inside her chest. She made a career making people believe in whatever she wanted, she supposed she’d be able to make you believe in her heart.

How hard would that be?

Laugh filled the room after another not-so-funny Tony’s jokes and your head throbbed as the sound echoed inside your skull. Parties like these were always a torture for you, after all, your enhanced abilities of hearing and catching smells better than a normal person proved to be really awful in a place full of people with different perfumes, scents, chattering and loud music.

However, Tony himself forbid you from leaving tonight for this was his engagement party and it would be rude to Pepper if you left too early. Deciding that indulging him was easier than arguing with him, you found a safe corner and pretended to enjoy whatever was going on.

Though, your sharp eyes, even though you tried hard, always wandered after a certain redhead and you could all but clench your jaw every time you judged someone got too closer for your comfort.

Jealousy clawed its way through your throat and even the best bourbon from the bar couldn’t help it. You knew you had no right, no claim, especially after your last conversation. Still, your heart acted on its own and made sure you’d regret your words and resolve.

Considering that you were one drink from scooping lower than ever for her, you abandoned your glass on a random table and vanished to the balcony in hopes the fresh air could help your head and brain.

The cars down the streets ran from side to side completely unaware of your inner turmoil as you pathetically looked down searching for answers you wouldn’t find there.

In fact, as your answers arrived at the balcony, you realized that her hills clicking the marble floor announced her before her perfume invaded your nostrils in waves as she moved closer and closer towards you.

“Tired of mingling?” She asked as she lined her body at the railing. Her red hair bobbed around her ears in meticulously designed waves and her dark maroon dress hugged her curves in all the nice places.

She was flawless.

As always.

“I think I might’ve break Sam with incredible five words.” You gave her a sly smile that she retributed with a smirk and a fake gasp.

“This is basically a whole speech.” She clicked her tongue playfully. “I think you’ve been around Tony just too much.”

You snorted a laugh and she let a broad smile paint her lips, content with herself for making you ease the pained expression adorning your face the whole evening.

Uncertenty hugged you like a cold blanket as you pondered your next words. As if rolling the dices in a game you were sure you’d end up losing, you turned to her and spoke. “You’re really beautiful tonight, Nat.”

Your heart fluttered as she fought back a smile trying to win her lips and looked down as if she wasn’t expecting your praise. She genuinely looked flustered by your words.

“Thank you. You’re quite handsome yourself. Well, I already praised your choice of suit, earlier.” She turned her body so now she was fully looking at you and you tried to remember how to properly breath. However, it was as if the air was composed of her scent.

You were intoxicated.

“What do you mean?” You asked confused. “This is the first time we speak tonight.” You clarify. Truth be told you’ve been keeping a fair distance from her and funnily enough she didn’t make the effort to push you and your comfort space.

She did make it obvious that she was trying, though. She invited you out in front of people, she brought you coffee whenever you were reading in the garden in the morning or brought you a blanket when you were on the couch watching movies with Wanda.

Whenever you were called to a meeting, she worked the lights so it wouldn’t hurt your eyes that much. And, one day, she brought you the files they recovered from Hydra from the mission you were taken, and you both learned that one of your creators left behind a journal and there were a lot of dirty secrets down there. Including yours.

To be honest, she was really trying to show her true intentions, but you were still afraid that this was just for show, just a ploy for you to lower your guard and be disappointed after she return to her normal pattern of misleading.

However, the way she stood basking in the moon light looking at you like she was slowly sipped through the cracks of your determination of not giving in that easy.

Her soft smile was a sight to see, and you even forgot that you were waiting for her to reply. “Directly, yes. I sent a drink to you earlier.”

Then it clicked in your head. Your laugh was loud and very uncharacteristic of you, though Natasha simply stood there admiring your carefree stance, a rare occurrence.

Your mind traveled to a moment earlier that night when the waiter approached you with a drink in hand, stating that the lady had sent it to you complimenting your fine tailored suit. At the time, the way he vaguely waved in the direction of Agatha and other ladies, you thought that one of them had been the person.

Though if you thought harder about it, Natasha was at the bar in that moment, right behind said ladies.

“Now it made sense.” You grinned back at her and nodded your head softly. “Thank you for the compliment and the drink.”

“Of course.” She flashed on last smile and turned her body to admire the city bellow and you did the same. Though you found it hard to ignore her presence by your side. You could feel the heat emanating from her skin, her sweet scent still impregnating the air around you and you could hear her fast heartbeat. It was uncommon.

In a haste, you both turned towards each other and started to speak at the same time. A nervous laugh scaped your lips as you signaled for her to go on first. And she did.

She closed her eyes as one does when bracing for the impact, as if second-guessing her next step, but when she opened her eyes again, there was no doubt and no deceit. “I love you and it’s ruining my life not having you, knowing that I am the one who pushed you away.”

You were speechless by her blunt confession, specially because she never, ever, used the word love in such a direct sentence. She expressed her feelings before, yes, but always with an adore, in love with you once or twice, never this straight.

She took your silence as hesitancy and reached for your hand, she yearned for your touch and the closeness of the last weeks made her heart clench with longing. “I am asking for a chance to show you who I really am, and I, please, I know I’ve made mistakes, but I wish to make it up to you.”

Her eyes were pools of emotion and you had trouble in breathing with her so close now. “Please, let me love you the way you deserve, the way I should’ve since the very first time I kissed your lips.” Her free hand caressed your cheek in such a tender way that you felt your knees weak.

She was definitely your true weakness.

You brain was haywire, short-circuiting with the lack of air and the sudden increase in your heartbeats. There she was. The woman you felt like you could love forever, offering you what you always wanted: her heart. For real this time. Not the hide and seek games you’ve been playing in the past.

She promised and have been showing changes, however, if you were to be honest, all she’d have to do was to come at you and say hi. If you were to be honest, she would always have your heart at her mercy.

Unable to form words and knowing that your silence was unnerving for her, as you saw her brows furrowing, you decided to answer her differently as you brought your hand to her own cheek and guided her lips to meet yours.

Her lips were soft as they used to be, and you could feel her body melting into the kiss. Her eyes fluttered open when you broke the kiss and smiled softly at her. “I love you too, Nat.”

Smiling back at you, Natasha circled her arms behind your neck to pull you down for another kiss, and another. And another.

And you knew, all too well, that she wouldn’t stop soon.

taglist: @username23345; @afuckingshituniverse; @strangegardentaco; @waltermis (I know you didn't specifically asked to be tagged, but I am doing it, nonetheless, because if your rb - and because you sparked a fire in this. Thank you.)

[hannahssimblr]

Chapter Eleven

“You never texted me that you got home safe” Marnie is saying to me as we pack up our charcoal and newsprint and start shuffling out of Ida’s classroom the following afternoon.

“Oh, that was because you were acting really weird and mad.”

“I’m on my period, you know how it is.”

“Yeah absolutely.” 

“You obviously got home okay though, I mean, you’re here.”

“I did.” Dean is packing his things away in the corner of my eye and I have to try very hard not to look at him, just like I’ve been trying all morning, albeit somewhat unsuccessfully because every time he shuffled his feet or sniffed I’d look up at him, and then somehow he’d know about it and stare right back at me over his easel. His chair makes a loud scraping sound against the floorboards as he drags it back over to the wall with all the others and we look at each other again.

“Did he walk you home?”

“Who?”

“Dean. Did he end up walking you home?”

“Oh, yeah he did.” We turn away from him and head out into the hallway and she starts looking at me with suspicion. 

“There’s something up with you today.”

“Is there?”

“Yeah you seem away with it.”

“I suppose that I’m tired.” Which isn’t a lie, considering I didn’t hit the bedsheets three last night and then lay awake with my eyes sprung wide open and fixed on the ceiling for at least two more hours after that. 

“Well, what did you think of that conversation last night? The one about which girl Dean would pick.”

“Oh, I thought it was pretty stupid.”

“Me too, I can’t believe Fiona asked that, like what the hell, so juvenile of her.”

“Mm.”

“She’s really like that sometimes, it can be embarrassing to be around her, she acts so young…” She pauses. “Bizarre that he picked you though, isn’t it?”

I shrug. “Well I guess he had to say something. I’d say he just picked me because it’s the least likely to actually happen. A low risk choice.”

“Right?” she agrees. “It’d be so weird.” She swings outside into the yard and holds the door open for me. It’s a cold day, but it’s sunny and bright and fresh. The air smells vaguely like cut grass and flowers. “So anyway, I’ve been thinking about your birthday. I’ve already set up an event page on Facebook, but I’m yet to confirm a venue.”

“Wait, we’re really doing that?” I had assumed that the party wasn’t happening anymore on account of her bad mood last night, but obviously I was mistaken. She’s so indecipherable, a true enigma of a woman.  

“Of course we are, and we’ve only got a week to organise it now, so make sure to add your housemate and her friends to the group.” 

“I’m meeting her now, actually, so I’ll mention it.”

“Oh, amazing.” We head up the street and reach a crossroads on the road where she stops to ask me which way I’m going. I tell her I’m getting the bus into O’Connell street and she nods and points the other way. “Well, this is me. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah for sure. And thank you for organising the whole birthday thing, it’s actually really nice of you to do it.”

“Don’t mention it.” She gives me a kiss on each cheek like a French girl and pushes me towards the bus stop with a dramatic flourish. “au revoir mon amour” She calls out to me, using the worst accent I’ve ever heard in my life. 

The lunchtime crowds are picking up in the city centre and getting from one end of O’Connell street to the other is like pushing through a rugby scrum. I nimbly side step a woman fighting with her pram as she spills off a bus, and then swerve around a catholic group holding a big obstructive banner that declares: Ireland needs Fatima and praying the rosary in a big circle. Then I almost get stuck with one of those pushy charity workers in yellow T-Shirts, but don’t and then feel supremely pleased with myself about it. I have the kind of face that salespeople just flock to, but not today. Today I navigate this city like a real native, moving, no, waltzing through every roadblock I encounter and then I come to the Spire, an enormous silver pin piercing the blue sky and Claire is right underneath it waiting for me. She grins when she sees me and gives me a quick wave. 

“I’m starving, are you?” She says as she rushes across the road towards me throws her arms around me in a hug. She smells like her signature Flowerbomb perfume, and it makes me feel some kind of erupting happiness. 

“Oh yeah, I am. Do you know where you’d like to go for lunch?”

Her eyes open wide and excited and she breathes, “Bewley’s.” 

I laugh and we start walking back towards Grafton Street. “Whatever you want, Claire, you can have.” Hanging out with her is worlds away from hanging out with my college friends, because I know that none of them would ever set foot in a place like Bewleys, the café that your grandmother visits when she takes a trip to Dublin for the day to have the famous sticky buns and a cup of white coffee. It’s got that old fashioned charm that is dying in this city and Claire just wants all of it, all the time. I love that about her, she doesn’t really care about seeming too cool for things, she just does what she wants.

I wait until we’re seated with our menus before I tell her about Marnie’s plan for my birthday. “So, my birthday…” I begin, and instantly she clasps her hands together and gasps excitedly. “Yes! I’m so excited. I want to book a restaurant that Jaz recommended. They do Asian street food. How does that sound?” She wiggles her eyebrows like she’s just revealed the most exotic idea on earth to me and I laugh. “I didn’t take you for a noodle kind of girl.”

“I checked the menu and they do katsu curry. I had that once before and I liked it. Honestly because it tastes like takeaway curry, so if I get chips instead of rice then basically it’s like a curry chip takeaway but in cooler surroundings.”

I pat her hand. “That sounds great Claire, and I appreciate that you’re doing this for me, considering how much you hate trying new foods.”

She breathes out and beams at me. “I do, I really hate new foods. Shane took me to one of those crazy burger places on Valentine’s day and they had one with actual peanut butter on it.” She sticks out her tongue in disgust. “Who would want that?”

“Dublin is having a gourmet burger moment.” I muse. “I wonder is that the same place that made Marnie and I stand outside in the rain for forty minutes to get a table.”

“Oh I bet it was, it was awful. I was so disappointed. Sometimes I really do think that everyone here is an awful snob, and the cost of them. Listen, we had two burgers, two portions of chips, Shane had a bottle of Moretti and I had lemonade. Guess how much.”

I shrug. “Probably north of forty quid.”

“Fifty two euro.” She pauses for dramatic effect, her eyes like saucers. “Turns out the sides were extra. And your one, the waitress, who was, by the way, rude, wanted a tip. I was shocked. I said, where are we? Have I been knocked out and woken up in the USA? Since when should I be leaving a tip?”

Our waiter arrives to take our order and I ask for the caesar salad and an americano all while grinning at Claire, amused by her outrage. It’s so easy sometimes to imagine her older than she is now, having similar kinds of conversations with ladies from her yoga classes, or with their prams by their sides, gossiping outrageously in whispers while they rock their infants to sleep. It’s funny, but when I think of Claire like this I’m never with her because I can’t picture myself being older. At least not in the same way that she can. I don’t know what I want, but she knows exactly. The kind of house, the number of kids, the dogs, the car, it’s all worked out already, and I find myself wishing I could switch brains with her for a day just to experience the tranquillity of it. How nice it must be to be able to imagine your own future and see something other than… well, nothing at all.

“Well .” I conclude. “Let’s hope that this street food place is more reasonable.”

“Oh, it is. I made sure to check the prices online first. So will I just book for both of us and Shane?”

“Yeah sure! But actually, about next weekend, I wanted to ask you something.”

She looks at me with interest. “Oh?”

“So Marnie wants to organise a party for me. I tried to talk her out of it already but she insisted. She’s booking out some venue next Saturday night and inviting a load of people from college and other friends to come. Will you and Shane come too? You can invite Jaz and Serena too, if you want. I think it might be fun.”

“Marnie’s doing this?”

“Yeah, I mean, I know you two don’t exactly get along and I know we’re already doing dinner on Sunday, but it’d mean a lot if you were there.”

“It just sounds expensive. Are you sure about it?”

“Well that’s the crazy thing, she’s insisting on paying for it too.”

“What?”

“I know.”

“That’s generous of her.” She says with some haughtiness and I laugh self consciously. “Well, yeah, I know it is. Honestly I think it’s a bit mad, but she really wants to do this. I think she wants an excuse for a party though, and my birthday just happens to be the next one coming up.”

“Well, fair enough. It’s her money.”

“So what do you think? Will you come?”

She sighs ruefully. “You know, I really wish we could but Shane and I already have plans.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. It’s such a shame because I’d love to be there for you but it’s kind of something we can’t get out of.”

The waiter comes back with our lunch and I cradle my coffee to my chest trying to warm up my cold hands. “Is it a family thing?” 

“Nope.”

“Oh do you have a thing with Jaz and Serena?”

“Um… no.” She looks shifty. I watch her carefully as she starts picking at the crisps on her plate. What’s up with her? Her gaze is lowered and her lashes fanning over her cheeks so I can’t read the expression in her eyes. I try another question. “Okay, is it like, a concert or a play or something?”

“No, it isn’t.” She finally relents. “We’re actually meeting some friends.”

“What friends? You can just bring them to the party, the more the merrier honestly.” I pause. “Unless it’s Kelly. It’s not Kelly, is it?”

She smiles. “No, it’s not Kelly. As if I would hang out with her unless I was absolutely forced to.”

“Anybody else.” I state. “Anybody else I’d be totally fine with you bringing along. Even if you’re getting dinner or something first, you’re all welcome to come to the party afterwards, I really don’t mind.”

“Okay.” she says slowly, clearing her throat anxiously. “Except for that it’s Jude.”

Prev // Next

[i-mybrunettelady]

Ivre d'un rêve heroïque et brutal

Summary: Commander is trying to recover from her last fight with her latest enemy. Unfortunately, it’s not a smooth sailing. Content warnings: Mild blood and mentions of injury. Spoilers: Heavy spoilers for What Lies Beneath (LWS6) Title taken from José-Maria de Heredia’s sonnet, Les Conquérants.

It’s the first time she’s slept for the entirety of the night in days. Nyra’s well familiar with the blurred edges of working on interrupted, bad, or straight up absent sleep; this morning snapped into sharp focus that hasn’t left her since. 

That’s all thanks to Trahearne, his calming presence and the spell he’d devised years ago to combat this very problem. With a frustrated sigh, she admits to herself she couldn’t have done it herself. Allies are a good thing after all, she jokes inwardly, though it fails to produce more than passing, brief amusement. These days, few things can.

It’s been seven days since their encounter with the demon in the mine. Not nearly enough time to recover from merciless claws digging into her regrets and barely healed wounds, not nearly enough time to stop the terrified shake of her hands in the morning. At first, she woke in cold sweat and with trembling shoulders, wiping away tears beading in her eyes still. She could feel Rama and Yao’s sympathetic grimaces and her first instinct was to throw them in their faces. Who the fuck are they to question her strength? 

Thankfully, Nyra isn’t a slave to her instincts and she reminds herself that they both mean well and that they’re friends. Rama’s hand on her shoulder suddenly feels comforting, a far cry from the initial anger she felt bubbling inside her. Oftentimes, she leans into him, lets out a sad, exhausted groan and he wraps his hands around her. It only lasts for a minute or so, but she already feels steadier on her feet. 

Then Trahearne comes, vivacious green in the sea of jade (too vivacious for a necromancer, she thinks; another one of those brief, passing jokes she keeps telling herself) and joins her on her bedroll. His lips are soft on her forehead, his fingers gentle when they rub up and down her arm. That steadies her too. Sharply, she thinks when will Oni decide to fuck with that regret as well. 

It’s only a matter of time, really. And she has to be prepared.

“I’ll help heal injuries here,” she tells Trahearne one night, curled beside him on the bedroll. She looks at her hands. “If I think too hard about things, I’m almost half-sure the demon will have more ammo to use against me. I need something to keep myself occupied.” 

His remaining eye squints slightly. “But you won’t overwork yourself, yes?”

“I can try,” Nyra replies quietly. Her breakdown in Eye of the North is still too fresh to forget. “I can’t promise I won’t slip into it by accident. My head feels so heavy I don’t trust myself not to do it.” 

“I can watch you,” he proposes, reaching out to hold her hand. “Make sure you’re as good as you can reasonably be for Gorrik’s idea.” He considers. “I’m not sure I like it, Lyss. I know what it feels like and to see you go through it–” 

She laughs bitterly. “What other option do we have? If I have to play a sacrificial lamb, I will. Gods know I’ve done so more than once. Gods also know it’s brutal every time but if there were any other alternative, we’d have pursued it already!” She closes her eyes and exhales. “I don’t like it any more than you do, Trahearne. It’s gonna suck so bad, but someone has to do it. When my torture draws the damn thing out, just hit it until it’s dead.” 

“Lyss,” he repeats and pulls her close. “I just don’t want to see you in pain.” 

“I didn’t sign up to be who I am now to live a comfortable life,” she says. “If I wanted that, I would’ve been just another noblewoman from Divinity’s Reach. Me, just another noblewoman? Gods forbid.” 

Trahearne purses his lips. “Just take care of yourself, please.”

“I can try,” she repeats and means it. She can try. Has to, even. 

So here she is, in the mining camp’s healing corner in Gyala Delve, spreading pale blue light on an open injury on a woman’s arm. It’s an ugly one, obviously painful, and Nyra’s not the best of the best at healing, not by a long shot, but she can make these people feel better. She knows her way around poultices, salves and stitches. She knows healing magic, Dwayna’s blessing. In a twisted way, the metallic tang of blood is comforting, familiar. It’s a residue of battle and she gets to wipe it off, but the scent remains. 

Battle never leaves you, after all. She knows as much. 

The injured woman groans when Nyra guides her magic to stitch the flesh shut. Guardian healing can, in truth, feel a little invasive. Despite the supposedly unsettling way her eyes look, Nyra never breaks eye contact when she guides her down and whispers in a soft tone, “Rest now. It’ll feel better in a bit. And do try to not strain that arm much for the next few days, yeah?” 

“Yes, Commander,” the woman intones, exhausted but still horribly formal. Nyra pushes sweaty hair from her forehead and smiles slightly. She knows it doesn’t look very convincing - people think she’s angry half the time, for fuck’s sake - but she tries anyway. 

Dying light of day reflects, rickety, in the reflection of the water bowl where she washes her hands. For a brief moment, Nyra observes the way blood sticks to the scars on her hands and knuckles, bright red against faintly scorched skin. Once, she would’ve shivered in discomfort over running her fingertips over it, but now it’s a part of her. 

There’s so much blood on her hands. The thought comes uninvited, sneaky little shit. Nyra vividly remembers Apatia’s blood on her hands when she killed her ten years ago. Trahearne’s sap, when she ran through him with Caladbolg, seven years ago. What had Almorra said? That she hasn’t changed, that all she does is kill and corrupt? Nyra turns sharply to the injured woman. Her arm is still red, but mostly fine. 

If she wasn’t careful, she could’ve killed her. 

Nyra’s never washed her hands faster in her life. She leaves wet handprints on the wooden table as she leans over it, watching her own wide eyes in the bloodied surface of the water, trying to catch her breath. In and out. In and out. 

Hands hover over her arms. She knows Trahearne’s presence like the palm of her hand, a heavy blanket against her shivering body. “Are you alright?” he asks, hushed. Nyra shakes her head and grips the table tightly. 

“I think I need to take a break,” she says. Before, she would’ve pushed herself, powered through the panic; now she needs every bit of that strength she can muster. One battle, a failure at that, doesn’t mean the end of a war. She must strategise, try to outmaneuver that fucking creature. 

She feels her breathing even out. Trahearne’s holding her arms in a comforting grip, but it’s the tactical approach that makes her think straight once more. She’s a soldier, after all; why not use what’s at her disposal as such? Still, her hands are shaking and she still feels like a giant, human-shaped, raw wound. 

“Do you want to get something to eat?” Trahearne lets go of her arms to hold her hand. “Some tea?” 

“Tea would be nice,” she replies, holding onto the way he rubs her fingers like a lifeline. “Very, very nice.” 

He leans over to softly kiss her on the lips. “We’ll get one cup of tea for the lady, then,” he whispers. 

She’ll outmaneuver the enemy however she must, one cup of tea at the time.

[volcanocraft]

cw: night terrors, distressed language, and post-traumatic stress

These posts may not be very interesting or informative but i like writing them. I haven’t ruminated on this part of my life in that much detail before the last post on it. I don’t know many people with night terrors so heres my personal experience with them.

I am unable to pinpoint when it started. maybe two years ago and it has gotten more volatile since then. i would wake up in a cold sweat (literally drenched) feeling afraid of something, my body kicked into hypervigilance, but not being able to figure out what im even scared of. Its a weird feeling because you feel simultaneously silly and exasperated and shocked no one is doing something all at once. i can recall some parts of my terrors as soon as i wake up but lose the thread hours later. i know that the theme of these dreams usually repeat in different scenarios but i legitimately don’t think it should cause me the distress it does. my dreams do not resemble the flashbacks i experience when im awake and thats where i’m like whats going on dude

I was not the one who found out about these terrors. looking back, i probably had some sort of idea but was never sold on it. I regularly share a bed with a friend and they’re the one who told me that I was very distressed in my sleep.

Often I will scream or cry-yell, unfortunately loud enough that I wake up my friend and my dog. Other times i’m upset but coherent. I legitimately don’t know what I say in these instances and have to be told them. That’s probably the most embarrassing part of this whole thing because it's always stuff like "fuck off! get off of me! I'm scared." or "get away from me. please just stop" or "why can’t you just listen?” and even typing this out makes me feel so fucking lame HAHA because i really am okay the morning after

This has never personally concerned me. The only time I’ve seriously considered it as a problem is when it becomes physical. I flail, toss and turn, and all that good stuff in my sleep. On occasion I will have a violent dream that causes me to start kicking or punching or jump out of bed. sometimes i will not recognize whose beside me and start freaking out and try to defend myself. Other times I’ll bang my head on the wall or kick it and have been known to punch or fight the wall, which is kind of funny, but i do end up having a sore foot or hand because of it

i think it comes in waves. for a while I had them track me and have been doing really well. three weeks ago I suddenly started again, and it’s been happening practically every night since then, save one or two days. I’m not medicated for my parasomnia specifically, my doctors don’t take it seriously and I’m tired of pushing it. Again, I do not think it’s that big of a deal. I have been waking up distressed for a long time now and I’ve come to terms with having the same sorts of dreams over and over again. It sucks but it doesnt impact me in noticeable ways other than getting consistent rest. It very much sounds worse on paper and I’ve been doing mentally very well recently. it’s probably a side effect of my mental disorder and the symptom i care about the least. My friend has encouraged me to speak to the professional i see weekly (I don’t know how to describe her, she does social work by trade). if this goes anywhere ill be very surprised and then whatever man I suppose owe you 50 bucks. the end

[warlock-enthusiast]

"Come with me, hurry."

Prompt number: 13 Fanfiction Fandom: The Wayhaven Chronicles (somewhere between book two and three) Rating: PG Characters: Adam du Mortain, Felix Hauville, Female Detective:: Kat Kingston Warnings: non apply

I’ve not slept well in weeks. Considering the recent changes in my life I believe that I have the full right of tossing and turning and getting tangled in the sheets. Between being thrown into the supernatural world and being thrown against a brick wall of a man that is haunting my thoughts every day, I’m ready for a long vacation. No weird experiments, no haunted carnivals, just a bunch of books and hot chocolate. 

Wouldn’t that be nice. 

Said brick wall suddenly bursts through my door, all cargo pants and a too tight shirt. He has his earpiece in and looks slightly ruffled. The strength of his entrance almost took out my bedroom door and I wince as I see it dangle in an awkward angle. Not that Adam is especially sorry for destroying my property. Seems to be a favourite of his.

"Come with me, hurry." He grabs my sheets and starts to pull. 

“Adam?”

“Get up.”

To be honest, I think that I have dreamed about this. Though he was a little more naked and a little more flushed in whatever my head had come up with during a specifically sleepless night. Right now, all I do is blink at him.  “What…”

“I’ll explain later. The rest are waiting outside.”

“I’m not… let me…” I’m not dressed to leave my bed. I want to hide beneath the covers and feel a blush rushing to my cheeks. Soon my skin will match my hair in terms of redness. 

What a pleasing thought. 

“No time for that. We got some very bad intel and I …” He stumbles over his words and doesn’t look at me, but his words are filled with whatever this is between the two of us. “*We* need you to be safe.” 

Adam is doing the sad puppy eyes, though he’d never admit it. Even in this dim light the green is rather mesmerizing. Something in my stomach lurches and I’m between wanting to throw up and throwing myself against him. 

I curse beneath my breath as I finally untangle myself from my sheets. I see his eyes going wide as he watches my sleeping ensemble. To my utter horror, I’m not dressed sexily or pretty or even professional. The days are getting cold, which is why I’m dressed in a pyjama that Tina got me for my last birthday. It’s hot pink and adorned with a myriad of cute cats. Not to mention extremely fluffy and warm. The pants are slightly too long, which is why I need two tries to get into my sensible slippers. 

“I…” Adam shakes his head and says nothing and I might have killed all attraction that he not so secretly harbored for me. I follow him and just know that my mom wouldn’t have been caught dead in such a thing, but Rebecca is Rebecca… 

Felix is standing outside, watching the scenery, and I notice their overly big car down the street. He’s all business and ready to fight whatever might be hunting me, but then he almost chokes on a chuckle as he sees me approach. 

“Really?” Felix starts to laugh and. “Show me this.”

He reaches for my pjs and touches the fabric. “At least it’s soft.” “We got no time for this.” Adam interrupts us and pushes on towards their car.

I still hear Felix suppressing his laughter and pray for the ground to open up and swallow me.

[mamirhodessxox]

Hey There Delilah Incorrect Quotes

(some made by myself)

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

*Delilah trying out ballet*

Delilah: GUYS MY TIP GAME IS CRAZY!!

Cody: “I don’t think you should announce that any louder hun”

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Delilah: “I think I’m pregnant”

Mira: “Of fucking course he did. He couldn’t wait til after the wedding could he.”

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Rhea: Mira, don’t go picking a fight with Randy. Don’t forget, they’re powerful, they could make life difficult for you.

Mira: Wow, I wonder what it'd be like to have a difficult life.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Delilah: Lol. Heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you’ll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this.

Cody: What did you do Delilah?

Delilah: a Mistake :(

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Delilah: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.

Cody: Oh. We're going out?

Delilah: Wh...

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Dom, looking at their watch: It has been 2 hours and sixteen minutes since I’ve been insulted.

Dom: It’s been about 5 seconds since I’ve been assaulted, but let’s not talk about that.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

*Randy is talking about their past*

Randy: I guess it was that day I came home to a cold, empty house, devoid of light and love, and I knew then that my sorrows would only grow.

Mira: Randy, this is the saddest life story I have ever heard! And you haven't even covered the teen years!

Delilah: Oh, I'm sure it gets better!

Randy: Ha! No, at eleven, things really took a turn for the worst.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Cody: How many vampires do you think have been hit by a car backing up in a parking lot because the driver couldn’t see their reflection?

Delilah: I’ve never considered it but you’re really shining light on what’s probably a very serious issue.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Seth: Pick a card, any card.

Mira: Fine.

Seth: Wait, that's my credit card!

Mira: You said any card.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

Randy: I put the pun in punishment.

Becky: I put the top in unstoppable.

Mira: I put the cute in execute.

Rhea: I put the sexy in dyslexia.

Dom: I put the ass in class.

Cody: I put the D in Delilah.

🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸🫶🏼🌸

@alyyaanna @claymoresofinfamy23 @femdisa @jeysbvck @kabloswrld @southerngirl41 @mini-rhodes

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Finally got around to making a list for that Hogan’s Heroes/Taylor Swift prompt list I mentioned a while back, so welcome to Cruel Summer at Stalag 13!! (cannot for the life of me decide if I love or hate the event name, it’s real hard to make a combo of Hogan’s Heroes and Taylor Swift 😂) Lemme know what you think, I was considering coming up with some alternate prompts in case there were some that weren’t catching your eye, but it was hard enough to come up with the 31, so if there is a Taylor Swift song or some Taylor Swift lyrics that you would have liked to see, drop me a line and I’ll add them on! I’m gonna go ahead and set it up for the month of July so everyone can have plenty of time to get a start on their creations (or if you’re like me you can just wait till the last second 😂) I may or may not make a collection on ao3 but I'll keep yall posted on that

For starters I’m gonna go over some rules (though I don’t really like to call them that cuz there aren’t really any rules) but anywho

If you’re writing, these do not have to be song fics, these are just meant to be prompts to inspire whatever story, art, etc. you may have inside of you, no use of lyrics or any mention of music required, it doesn’t even really need to be related to the song as a whole in anyway, so no knowledge of Taylor Swift is required

All types of media are welcome!! This includes, but is not limited to, writing, artwork, gifsets, video edits. Whatever you can come up with, you are more than welcome to share!

Interpretation is completely up to you!! Whatever idea comes to your mind, just roll with it, there is no wrong way to do it

You can complete as many or as few prompts as you wish

If you choose to post your work, please tag it with #cruel summer at stalag 13

Please wait until the day of the prompt to post, and late submissions are always welcome!

And most importantly, have fun :D 

If you have any questions at all, please do not hesitate to reach out to me, I promise I don’t bite lol

Without further ado, prompts are below the cut! If the prompt is a lyric, I put the title of the song they’re from after it in parentheses. There’s also a picture after the text (and quick shout out to @annieslytherpuff21​ for some of these suggestions!)

A Place in This World

It’s a typical Tuesday night (You Belong With Me)

Dear John

I remember it all too well (All Too Well)

Hung my head as I lost the war / And the sky turned black like a perfect storm (Clean)

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Death by a Thousand Cuts

Back when I was livin’ for the hope of it all (August)

Crescent moon, coast is clear (Ivy)

Sometimes I wonder which one’ll be your last lie (Vigilante Shit)

You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray (Cold as You) 

I close my eyes and the flashback starts (Love Story)

Innocent

Now I’m lying on the cold hard ground (I Knew You Were Trouble)

Out of the Woods

New Year’s Day

It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Peace

Past the blood and bruise / Past the curses and cries (Happiness)

I should not be left to my own devices (Anti-Hero)

I’ve been a lot of lonely places / I’ve never been on the outside (The Outside) 

It’s hard to fight when the fight ain’t fair (Change)

Do you still feel like you know what you’re doing / Cause I don’t think you do (Better Than Revenge)

Starlight

It’s poker, he can’t see it in my face / But I’m about to play my ace (New Romantics) 

Don’t Blame Me 

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes (Cruel Summer)

Epiphany

Tolerate It

Mastermind

All that bloodshed, crimson clover (The Great War)

[screamonic]

Hi!! I have a request, it's about the female reader having a older brother who was a member of Tenjiku, but he died because of a fight, and the reader is strong and also not very expressive and a calm person, she also sometimes wears a mask to hide her face, The Tenjiku members met her before but she as wearing a mask but this time they went to visit her older brothers gravestone after he died and she isn't wearing her mask, and she's REALLY pretty, all of hem are out of breath because she's pretty, but she starts to breakdown. And let out all of her emotions. And they don't know what to do

I don't know if your requests are open or not, but if they aren't you can ignore this😅

Why did you go?

Sorry this is so short but I hope you enjoy.

Angsty fluff?

The grey clouds formed as you start to place your coat on, walking towards the front door looking to the table near where it has some flowers placed upon it. Grabbing the flowers you see your very well loved mask, putting it into your pocket just incase you begin to walk out. Letting your feet decide your route as thoughts raced in your clouded mind.

Why did your idiotic brother had to join a gang? If he never joined Tenjiku he would’ve been alive and not just a cold stone to mourn. Taking a deep sigh you arrived at his grave, almost forgetting how you ended up here sitting down placing the spider lilies onto his grave a few tears ran down your warming cheeks,

"I’m here again. I’ve missed you.. I got an A in my test! I hope you’re proud." You chirped trying to fight back the tears.

"Eh?" Someone’s voice took you out of your thoughts making your head almost swivel off, the familiar faces felt like a curse to you, standing up you examine their shocked faces,

"Is that really you?" The very missed Sanzu squawked, in awe of the beauty you hid from him all those years ago,

"Yes Sanzu. It’s me. I didnt even know you guys would visit his grave." You spoke, the monotonous sounds in your voice where to try hide your truest emotions at that moment.

"Of course. He was our most dearest." Izana mumbled, as you all stood there in comfortable silence, it was broken by a sob. Your sobs. Heads turned but you didn’t care, you had the right to feel auch ways,

"You know.. He was really fond of you all." You choked out, using a tissue to try wipe off the tears beautifully framing your face,

"He always said he considered you all as family." The fat blobs starting falling more rapidly, a hand placed on your shoulder made you jump a little,

"I- We know. But please, he would hate to see you cry like this pretty girl." The older Haitani cooed, trying to make you feel a little better as he assisted on wiping your tears.

"Yeah.. What he said. What happened to the strong girl we loved so much." Mochizuki mumbled his hand rubbing on the small of your back, you can tell how awkward they where with this. Making a light giggle come from your lips before it was chased by a large sob. From that day they all promised to never let anything bad happen to their precious angel.

[writingpaperghost]

Without You (Chapter 20)

Chapter 20: Experiment! Freezing the Sea!

Karizaki has a new Vistamp for Makoto.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43371954/chapters/126386674

“Good news, I-ga-ra-shi!” Karizaki sing-songed, spinning around to point at Makoto, in case there was any question as to who he was talking to, despite Makoto being the only other person present. He didn’t like being alone with Karizaki, but there was no helping it, as Karizaki had insisted on seeing him.

“Oh, really?” Makoto did not even bother to feign interest.

Karizaki pouted, “At least pretend to be curious. You should be curious.”

“Bite me,” Makoto responded, “Now what’s this all about?”

Still pouting, Karizaki picked up a green and blue Vistamp from his desk, “I’ve been working on something new for you.”

Another Vistamp, it seemed. Some other kind of weapon, then? “I hope it’s better designed than the weapon the Marlin Vistamp gives me, that thing is a disaster.”

“Hey!” He sounded rather offended by that. “It looks cool. Besides, this is different from the Marlin Vistamp.”

Makoto tilted his head, that comment had piqued his curiosity. “Different? How so?”

Karizaki grinned, clearly pleased at his new interest, “You see, the Marlin Vistamp simply gave you a weapon. This Vistamp – the Anomalocaris Vistamp, it will give you whole new armor.” He tossed the Vistamp to his other hand, typing something on his computer, than gestured to the large screen beside him. “You’ll be even stronger with this.” Schematics of this new armor and the Anomalocaris Vistamp appeared on the screen.

There was some basis, in the armor, on the armor that Olteca already had while using the Squid Vistamp, but it had been adjusted and modified. There were a lot of notes littering the schematics, of adjustments, changes, and additions. Most notably, the intention, at least, seemed to be for the Anomalocaris Vistamp to be able to have the power to freeze things.

“Ice?” Makoto asked.

“I mean, close enough to water, right, and you are a squid.” Karizaki answered, still grinning, “So, pretty cool, right?”

Frowning, Makoto wasn’t quite sure what to think. A stronger Vistamp would be welcomed, of course, as all the help was appreciated in a fight. But Makoto wasn’t really sure he wanted to say that to Karizaki, or that he was necessarily the one who should be given such a Vistamp. Tamaki was far better suited.

Finally, Makoto said, “You should give it to Tamaki.”

Karizaki rolled his eyes, “It’s made for you, not Tamaki.”

“He’s a better fighter and far more skilled in any of the departments that are involved in being a Kamen Rider. He’d make far better use of a stronger Vistamp than I would.”

“I didn’t make it for him, though. It’s for you, no one else.”

“Why?” Why was Karizaki so insistent he be the one to use it?

He sighed, “Because,” he set the Vistamp down, “I’m certain that you make a better Rider than you give yourself credit for.”

Makoto scowled, “I killed a man.”

“No one’s making you fight,” Karizaki reminded.

“Except,” Makoto countered, “Fenix. I had little choice in that contract and we both know it.”

Considering that for a moment, Karizaki nodded, “That may be the case but… I think you’ve got the makings of a Kamen Rider, somewhere in that deep sea trench of a heart you’ve got.”

Rolling his eyes, Makoto said, “I don’t have a heart.”

“Metaphor, Igarashi.”

“Whatever you say, Karizaki.”

Again, Karizaki sighed, picking up the Vistamp once more, “Just take it, okay?”

Begrudgingly, Makoto takes the offered Vistamp from Karizaki’s hand. “Fine.”

The Anomalocaris Vistamp felt oddly heavy in Makoto’s hand, despite in theory weighing no more than the Squid or Marlin Vistamps. Yet there was something about it that was different, or at least nagged at Makoto like it was. It felt… cold, perhaps that was it, even though Karizaki had been holding it before. Like it radiated a coldness, one that reminded Makoto of far too many miserable days in the past. Makoto switched to holding it in his other hand, before soon quickly hiding it away in his jacket pocket altogether. Despite that, he felt like he could feel the cold leaking through both his jacket and his button up.

“Now, you can go back to your usual things,” Karizaki said, making shooing motions with his hands, “Just be sure to give the Anomalocaris Vistamp a try next chance you get.”

Shaking his head, Makoto sighed, “Yeah, sure.”

He couldn’t wait to just get back to Happy Spa, and far away from the madness that was Karizaki. He still couldn’t believe that Karizaki decided that he was the one who would make the best use of a stronger Vistamp. Or that he might be able to be a good Rider. Karizaki needed to get with reality and see what was right in front of him – that, at best, Makoto was doing a mediocre job, a job he hated, and was probably more likely to end up dead, than much else.

“At least dead, we don’t have to worry about the world that’s abandoned us.” It comes to him like a whisper, a terrible thought that Makoto has to quickly ignore. They seemed to be happening more often, recently, though Makoto couldn’t place why.

Then again, his life had been a lot more hellish than usual, recently.

---

“You know,” Hikaru began, watching as Sakura adjusted how the strange half shoulder cape that she’d decided was apart of his Papillion outfit sat, “You’re surprisingly good at figuring out how to make clothes have wing holes.”

He catches a small smile on Sakura’s face, as she paused her adjustments. She’d been making minor adjustments since she’d decided she’d liked this design on him best, but he hoped they were getting close to being done, as he was getting a bit tired of playing mannequin. “Thank you, I began giving it thought as soon as I’d saw you’d gained wings.” She walked around behind him, her hand running across his back, just under where his wings sprouted. “I strive to make sure that even those of us with more obvious physical traits can still wear clothes without too much trouble.”

Hana giggled, watching the two from her seat on Sakura’s couch. Blue yarn was at her side, knitting needles in her hands as she knitted what appeared to be a sweater. “Sakura’s good at that, she’s had practice with Ikki’s tail.”

Hikaru had only met Sakura’s brothers in passing, Ikki a few times, Daiji only once or twice. Frankly, Hikaru was afraid of Daiji and thus thankful to have met him so rarely. Ikki had seemed nice, but Hikaru had little interest in anyone else in the Deadmans except for Hana, and by extension, Sakura.

“I’d believe that,” Hikaru said, and Sakura emerged from behind him.

With a satisfied smile, Sakura declared, “You’re looking good, if I do say so myself.”

That brought a smile to Hikaru’s face and he laughed a little. “It is your work.”

“Well she’s right, you look great,” Hana added, “And sure, it’s plenty Sakura’s work, but… I mean, you still look good.”

“I promise you,” Hikaru said, wryly, “You can’t ruin my dignity much more than sprouting pretty butterfly wings already has.”

Sakura let out a quick laugh, “Ha! Oh, I wouldn’t bet on it. I could always put you in a pretty dress to match your pretty butterfly wings.”

“I said much more,” he quickly pulled away from Sakura, “You can still find ways and that wasn’t a dare.”

Hana laughed even more, smiling as she managed to say, “Leave the dresses to me.”

Moving from Hikaru to Hana, Sakura leaned down and gave Hana a quick kiss, “Of course, my queen. You do look wonderful in dresses.”

Watching the two made Hikaru’s heart twist, though he’d never say it. They looked so happy together, but it still hurt. As much as he tried to move past those feelings he held for Hana, the fact that they’d yet to go away and he’d only wound up with feelings for Sakura too made it a lot harder. But what could he do? Hana and Sakura had each other, and he’d even gone so far to tell Hana of his feelings, but it was obvious that she didn’t feel the same.

He didn’t resent the fact, he’d never resent either of them choosing someone they actually loved over him, yet in the absence of Hana’s love, in that manner, that meant all he had left was her friendship. He’d do anything for her, even if he didn’t fully believe in it. Like this. He had no desire to see Giff awoken, he didn’t think Hana did, either, but here he was, helping the Deadmans. All for Hana.

If his parents knew he was doing this, they’d never want him back – not that he wanted to go back. His parents and Weekend were a hell he was happy to escape. But still… if something went wrong here, he’d have nowhere else to go. Maybe the Igarashi family would take him, but he also wasn’t their child. They might take Hana, but it was less likely they’d take him. That was a worst case scenario but… he couldn’t help but worry.

What would happen if Giff really did wake up? Was he really helping the Deadmans get closer to reaching their goal?

Yet it was for Hana, so all those worries seemed almost irrelevant.

Sakura clapped her hands, snapping Hikaru out of his thoughts. “Alright, we’re all done here Hikaru, but if you’d like, you can stick around and come sit with us for a bit.” She gestured to the spot on the couch beside Hana, sitting down on Hana’s other side. Hana shot him a smile.

Nodding, Hikaru sat beside Hana, shifting to try to find a comfortable position with his wings. Since he’d grown them, it had been hard to find ways to sit in seats with backs without bothering his wings. They were sensitive and not compact in the slightest. Still, he was with Hana and Sakura, and he enjoyed that.

---

Makoto had run out of other things to do, so he was cleaning every inch of Happy Spa’s lobby. It wasn’t like he had anything else to do, and it was due for a good cleaning – after all it had been several weeks since he’d last ran out of other things to do and cleaned it. Carefully, he finished dusting a table and set the framed picture that had been on it back down.

He paused, staring at the picture, him, Tamaki, Hana, and their parents, standing in front of Happy Spa. He remembered the day the picture had been taken, in celebration of the first anniversary of the Igarashi family having adopted them. Makoto hadn’t been much for the festivities, or the picture, but he’d had little choice in the matter. The smile he wore had been forced, and though he prided himself on his fake smiles now, at the time they were still not that good.

Hana and Tamaki, though, looked genuinely happy. Of course they would, their lives had only improved once they’d become an Igarashi, and while the same could be said about Makoto, the other two were far better at smiling than he was. Or feeling well and truly joyful. In a way, Makoto almost wished he could be as happy as Tamaki and Hana were, though he knew he never would be. The chance for that had long been destroyed and Makoto doubted the pieces would ever be glued back together, even if Genta and Yukimi tried so hard.

For the most part, Makoto was content with that, he didn’t have much choice but to be. Shaking his head, he turned to continue his cleaning, before pausing, the Anomalocaris Vistamp like a chunk of ice in his pocket, cold permeating past the inside of his jacket, his button up, and then onto his skin. He hurried over the desk, fumbling to pull the Vistamp out and set it there. The Vistamp looked the same as it had when Karizaki had handed it to him, not a sign of being as cold as it had seemed to be. Still, he didn’t trust it not to do that again, for whatever reason, so he left it there, for now. He had cleaning to do and didn’t need it to get in the way, he could always grab it if he needed to go off and be Olteca.

He still didn’t know what Karizaki saw in him, but it was better just to go along with it than try to argue. Especially when Karizaki knew Makoto’s biggest secret. Keeping him appeased would be important, Makoto wouldn’t lose what little good he’d managed to claw his way into.

Soon enough, his cleaning is interrupted by his phone, Tamaki was calling and Makoto had learned at this point what that usually meant. Already, he was heading towards the desk, reaching out for the Vistamp. “Maki?”

“Evil’s back, with Jeanne this time, like he said he would be.” Tamaki was quick to respond.

“Great,” Makoto sighed, pocketing the Anomalocaris Vistamp. It still felt cold, though less then it had not long before. He’d be able to deal with it. “I’ll meet you there, then. Mr. Kadota able to make it this time?”

“Yeah, we’ll stand a bit better chance this time.” Makoto wasn’t so sure about Tamaki’s confidence on the matter, but it didn’t matter.

Makoto had a new Vistamp, and while he doubted it’d do much good, it was worth a shot. They didn’t have great odds against just Evil, with Jeanne’s aid it would be worse. While he doubted the Anomalocaris Vistamp would be able to do enough to chance that, it was still better than nothing. “Let’s just do our best.”

When Makoto arrives, Tamaki and Mr. Kadota are already fighting Evil and Jeanne – Evil having transformed with the TwosiDriver, Jeanne as the Cobra Deadman.

Calling out from his fight against Mr. Kadota, Evil said, “Little late, aren’t we, Olteca?”

Jeanne laughed, knocking Tamaki away, “He had to run here, can’t you see he’s out of breath? Such a pity he’s late, though.”

From one pocket, Makoto pulled out his Driver, placing it on his waist. Then, with a deep breath, he reached into his other pocket, pulling out the Anomalocaris Vistamp. He wasn’t convinced of anything Karizaki had said, but it was now or never, and Makoto couldn’t help but be curious, anyway. He activated the Vistamp, its voice ringing out across the fight.

Both Evil and Jeanne seemed surprised about it – perhaps Karizaki had somehow managed to keep the Vistamp a secret from the mole, then. Well, that would make this an even better surprise.

Placing the Vistamp in the belt, Makoto said, “This fight with be mine,” then he pushed the Vistamp to the side, activating the transformation.

An icy fog swirled around him, emerging from his feet. From that fog burst forth a squid and a many legged creature, like a shrimp, swirled together, following a path around him before coming up behind and over him, encapsulating him. Then the armor formed, at first it felt cold and heavy, but it quickly settled.

It looked like the armor in Karizaki’s schematics had, similar to what he usually had as Olteca, but now, a blue color leaked in, particularly on the parts of the armor that had changed. In his hand, he held a simple weapon, a colorful but far more practical green and blue harpoon, though the tips resembled icicles.

“He’s… different,” Tamaki noted, shocked.

The biggest difference that Makoto noticed was how his veins rushed with freezing blood, making his entire body feel like ice. Instead of making him shiver, though, it made him feel strong, stronger than even the Squid Vistamp had made him feel the first time he’d used it. An icy, nagging, fog nipped at the back of his mind, but he pushed it away.

Makoto threw the harpoon at Evil, then rushed towards Jeanne, ice hovering on the palms of his hands. While Evil managed to knock the harpoon aside with his TwosiDriver, Makoto kicked at Jeanne, who easily grabbed his foot, tossing it up and aside. Having anticipated this, Makoto planted his hands on the ground, springing himself away, ice blossoming from where his hands had been, rising up and around the snake like legs of Jeanne, freezing her in place, ice ending just around her waist.

With a shriek, Jeanne cried, “Evil! Get me out of this!”

As Jeanne was currently incapacitated, Makoto made his next target Evil, holding his hand out as he ran, and his harpoon returned to him. Evil was expecting him of course, already getting idea of what he could do from watching him freeze Jeanne. Makoto wouldn’t be so easily anticipated, though, taking the harpoon in both hands and jabbing at Evil.

Again, Evil caught the attack with the blade of his TwosiDriver, attempting to push the harpoon to the side. Ice spread along it, forcing Evil to jump back to avoid it spreading to the TwosiDriver, the harpoon stabbing into the concrete and the ice spread out in a flower, the edge of which ended just at Evil’s feet.

Jeanne continued to shriek. Evil shouted back, “I’m a bit busy here!”

“You know I hate the cold!” Jeanne shouted, sounding incredibly annoyed.

Paying her no mind, Makoto dropped his harpoon, imbedded in the concrete to the point it stayed upright, and ran towards Evil once more, punching. Easily, Evil blocked the attack, but was forced to pull away again by the ice that threatened to spread from Makoto’s fist. At this point, both of his hands were covered in ice that would spread to whatever he touched.

It was only a matter of time, with each punch and kick that Evil tried to block, the ice only spread further onto him, and Makoto wasn’t letting up. No, he was more focused than ever, the icy fog in his mind encroaching more and more.

“Show them our power,” A voice cackled, “Freeze them, beat them, show them that we’re to be feared.”

Quickly, Makoto reached for the Driver and activated his finisher. He jumped back, feet landing against his still upright harpoon, before he sprung off it, flipping so that his foot faced Evil and landed into him in a kick. Ice shattered around them, and Evil tumbled to the ground, TwosiDriver dropped, Vistamp clattering with it, transformation gone.

There’s another sound of shattering ice and soon the Cobra Deadman was gone, leaving only Jeanne, who rushed over to Evil and pulled him up. He grabbed the TwosiDriver and the Bat Vistamp.

“We’re leaving,” Jeanne hissed, anger palatable. Evil didn’t argue, seeming shocked to have lost to Makoto. With that the two were gone.

Makoto reached for the Vistamp, removing it from his Driver, and the armor the Anomalocaris Vistamp gave him was gone.

“Makoto!” Tamaki cried, his transformation disappearing, “That was- that was amazing! You beat Evil!”

“Yeah…” Makoto swayed, his head suddenly pounding.

“…Makoto?” Mr. Kadota called, concerned.

Makoto collapsed.

---

Sakura marched into her room, looking pissed, “Hana, your brother is terrible.”

“Tamaki?” Hana asked.

“Makoto.” Sakura responded, “He got a new Vistamp and it gives him ice powers.”

Hikaru blinked, “Oh, the cold.”

“I hate it!” Sakura pulled her boots off, then marched to bed, “Come cuddle with me, both of you.”

Blinking again, Hikaru asked, “Both of us?” Hana was already getting in bed beside Sakura, allowing her to wrap her arms around her.

As if it were obvious, Sakura answered, “Yes. Get over here, you take behind me. Between the two of you, you’ll warm me up in no time.”

Apparently, Hikaru was a heater now.

Still, he slipped into her bed behind her, awkward, unsure of what to do. Hana was cuddled against Sakura, held close to Sakura’s chest. Due to his wings, Hikaru couldn’t even turn his back to Sakura, or else trying to help her warm up would be a moot point, as she’d get little heat from his wings. He brought himself a little closer, so that his chest was closer to her back, though not touching.

That should be good enough, he thinks, and hopefully Sakura would warm up soon – he wasn’t sure how long he could take being in bed and this close to both Hana and Sakura. With all her blankets on her bed, really, it should only be a matter of time, especially with how closely she held Hana. Obviously, Hana didn’t mind, she appeared perfectly content.

Sakura shivered, then she and Hana collectively moved back, her back now up against Hikaru’s chest. He’s grateful that neither can see the blush that quickly came to his face. In a matter-of-fact voice, Sakura said, “The best way to get warm is for you to be as close to me as possible.”

Grimacing, but hiding it in his voice, Hikaru responded, “Of course.”

---

“Then, when he removed the Vistamp, Makoto collapsed.” Tamaki recounted, more for Captain Akaishi than for George, as he knew George had probably watched the whole thing from the safety of his lab. Tamaki and Captain Kadota had brought Makoto back to Fenix, so a doctor could see him, and had then come to the lab, the new Anomalocaris Vistamp in hand. Currently, George was examining it.

Captain Akaishi frowned, “That’s… worrisome.”

“It seems,” George announced, “That, somehow, the Vistamp exceeded the output it was intended to have. It must have resonated with him, in some manner. That’s the only way to explain the readings I got from that fight.”

“Resonated?” Captain Kadota asked, “And that caused him to collapse after?”

George began to type on his keyboard, “The output exceeded what his Driver was able to safely handle, and while the Driver isn’t supposed to continue to accept power after that point, the Vistamp wouldn’t be ejected or stopped like it was supposed to be.” He gestured vaguely, “Thus, it was a greater strain on Makoto then it should have been. The results could likely have been a lot worse if the fight hadn’t ended when it did.”

“We don’t know just what it did to him, yet,” Captain Kadota pointed out, “It only seems to be exhaustion, but we can’t rule out that something else occurred.”

Captain Akaishi drummed his fingers on his arm, “I’m sure Karizaki will ensure that we don’t have a repeat of this event.”

“I’m working on it,” George said, frowning, “Now will you hurry up and leave me alone so I can work?”

“That,” Captain Kadota sighed, “Is our cue to leave.”

The three exit, Captain Kadota and Captain Akaishi side by side, while Tamaki followed behind them. As they walked, Captain Akaishi appeared to be limping somewhat – Tamaki almost hadn’t noticed, but had heard that his footsteps were too irregular.

It seems it didn’t escape Captain Kadota’s notice, either, as he glanced over and asked, “Daiji, are you hurt?”

With a small, unamused sounding laugh, and a shake of his head, Captain Akaishi responded, “No, or well… I just overdid it a bit training today, I think.”

“It’s not good for you to injured yourself.”

“What about you, then?” Captain Akaishi asked, “You look pretty tired, Hiromi.”

Captain Kadota shook his head, “I just didn’t sleep well last night, I’ll be fine with some rest.”

Frowning, Captain Akaishi didn’t look all that convinced, “You don’t need to go getting hurt, either. We need all the Riders we can get, after all.”

“I’ll be fine, I just need rest.”

“If you say so.”

---

Even once Makoto woke up and he was let go from Fenix’s doctors, even after Tamaki had walked him home and he’d gone to hide away in his room, Makoto felt tired. His thoughts were slow and hazy, like he’d barely slept even though that wasn’t the case. He’d collapsed into his bed, exhausted, prepared to fall asleep fully clothed as he lacked the energy to get back up.

He drifts into a fitful sleep, awakening every so often when he though he heard a sound, though listening further proved no more sounds. His imagination, then, playing tricks on him while he was still exhausted. Even with his blankets, still wearing his jacket from earlier, he felt cold, like he was surrounded by ice. When he awoke from one sleep, feeling colder than he had before, he tiredly brought the back of his hand to his forehead.

Hot, so he had a fever. Maybe it was a mistake for the doctors to let him leave so quickly. At least, the fever explained why he was so damn cold. With a quiet groan, he pulled the arm back down, then tumbled out of bed, sitting on the floor for more than a few minutes. Somehow, he felt worse than he had before he’d gone to bed. He was shivering, the same cold he’d felt under the blankets, no colder despite being outside of them.

Carefully and weary, he managed to stand, though swaying and unstable. He braced a hand against the wall behind his bed, leaning over the table beside it. It had been a long time since he’d felt quite this sick – not since before he ran away. He’d spent several days confined to his bed with a fever, too weak to get up. His mother had been so worried, but his father refused to let her take him to a doctor. Eventually, he recovered, the contents of those days nothing but a blur to him.

Now, he was sick again, and he stumbled across his room. He wasn’t quite sure what his destination was, but he knew it wasn’t to be found in his room. Both his room and the rest of their home was dark, it must be late into the night, as it sounds like no one is still awake. Trying his best not to make too much noise, so he didn’t bother anyone, he slowly made his way to the bathroom.

Once there, he turned the faucet on without even thinking, and reached in, splashing water onto his face. He suddenly felt a bit better, like the water was able to alleviate some of his pains. Still, he felt cold and tired, though, and soon the water was shut off, his hands gripping the sink for balance. He felt if he let go, his legs may give out on him entirely.

Staring in the mirror, he can only think that he looks terrible. Pale and disheveled, bags already forming under his eyes. His face was flushed, only making how pale he seemed more obvious. There were other times where Makoto had felt that he couldn’t recognize himself in the mirror, once, after his father beat him, another after he’d come to Happy Spa. He could add right now to the list, if he didn’t feel quite so terrible.

The doctors had said he was fine, but it was obvious he was sick. Something was wrong, rarely did he get sick, and it had been years since it was so bad. How could they not have realized earlier? Then again, how hadn’t Makoto noticed the signs?

A terrible haze began to cloud his mind, not unlike the one that encroached on him when he’d been using the Anomalocaris Vistamp. Something had gone wrong, then, that had to be the case. Why else would he suddenly feel so terrible? Why else would Karizaki be trying to fix it?

“Did Karizaki do this on purpose? Were his words today only lies, lies he used to convince us to use that Vistamp?” A voice whispered in his mind, sounding sweet and warm.

Or was this unexpected, something he hadn’t meant to happen?

“He’s never really been kind to you. Or even nice. I bet he hates you. Us.”

But given what Karizaki knew about Makoto, and the clearly plotting and scheming mind he didn’t even try to hide, Makoto couldn’t trust anything Karizaki had said. Whatever he claimed to see in Makoto was likely just a lie, and this was the consequences of believing it.

“He hates me, obviously.”

Leaning back from the sink, his grip loosening, Makoto felt that haze grow. He scowled at the mirror. Just before he fell unconscious, Makoto saw something that made him suddenly grow even colder.

In the mirror, his reflection smiled back.

[kass-storycorner]

I’ve been thinking a lot about the Hu Tao and Chongyun storyquests the past days. Both deal with the afterlife (well the border between life and death so far) and ghosts. We know both are canon in Genshin, they exist for this world. Now what I’ve been thinking a lot about is … how much angst can I write with that in mind? I always see a lot of these how the characters would react to your death but… yeah, have fun with this. Or not.

The ghost of you

Prompt: You died and the characters are faced with the literal ghost of you.

Genre: Angst, Hurt, no comfort (especially for Xiao)

Characters: Zhongli, Xiao,

Format: text

Word count: 1714

This is not proof-read or anything, I just wanted to get that idea out of my head. I also really want to write this idea out for other characters, so maybe I'll share a part 2 in the future. and yes the title might be a mcr reference and i might have two other fics in my drafts named after mcr songsi had a rough week okay

Zhongli:

He loved you. With all his heart, with every fibre of his being, he loved you so much. Zhongli always knew that his decision to live a life among mortals would cost a price, but in his mind, it was paid with his Gnosis all those years ago. It was not until the first of his mortal friends started to die that Zhongli was reminded of how fragile humans were. Of course, he was aware to a certain degree that he would outlive his friends and even you, he just never considered how quickly a human life was lived. You both had spent an entire life together, and while Zhonglis body did not biologically age, he is able to change his form to his liking - so when you grew old and grey so did he. Most people in Liyue would see the two of take your stroll around the city, holding hands and they were enamoured by the way you still looked at each other, just like a newlywed couple. But you grew older each day until one day, on one of your walks through the city, your collapsed. Zhongli was quick to catch you and the people around rushed towards the two, helping Zhongli getting you to a doctor. However, what was a doctor to do, than to tell Zhongli that your body is giving up? The doctor nor Zhongli can do anything against the flow of time, though Zhongli wished he could. He was not ready to let you go, he was not ready for you to onyl life in his memories until the erosion of the earth will erease you from them.

You layed in the hospital bed, Zhongli right next to you never letting go of your hand, when you took your last breath. He sat next to you for a while, not saying a word, tears running down his face until he heard your voice.

"It's okay," there you stood on the other side of the bed, your dead body between the two of you. In all the years Zhongli lived he had seen more than a few ghosts and he was aware of the human afterlife - though seeing your ghost wasn't something he anticipated. "You're dead", Zhongli said quietly, tears still spilling from his eyes. "I know, love. I know. And I wish I could've stayed with you just a bit longer, I really do. But it's time. You gave me such a wonderful life; we spend so many years together and I am so thankful for it Zhongli. For all the stories you told me, for all the sleepless nights we spend together, for all the memories we made. I loved it. I love you." Zhongli still hadn't let go of your hand, still afraid of letting you go, even though the mind he loved was standing so close to him. "Love," he started, his voice heavy with grief. "I have so many more stories to tell you. Will you stay, just for a while longer?"

At that you had to laugh a bit and oh, how much he already missed your laugh. He just heard it a few hours ago, when you were still alive, but hearing it now just felt so painful. "Zhongli, even 10 lifetimes wouldn't be enough to be able to listen to all of your stories. But I'm so sorry to disappoint you, you know I can't stay."

He knew this just too well. Not only as someone who worked for decades as a consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor in Liyue, but also as the former Geo-Archon he knew it was better for you to go. It pained him that he could never follow you into the afterlife that was awaiting you, even Zhongli didn't know what awaits you behind the border between life and death. "Then," Zhongli began, standing up and letting go of your cold hand, "let me accompany you."

Xiao:

Continuation for the Xiao one

Xiao refused to go even near the place you died for decades. The day he lost you was still so fresh in his memories, it pained him even more than his karmic debt to think about it. He always told you, when you were still by his side, that when you were in trouble, in danger, to always call his name. You did. You always did and he would be by your side, protecting you from what would’ve harmed you. The only time you refused to call his name in time was the day you died, and all Xiao could do was blame himself. You were visiting at the Inn earlier that day, standing next to him on the balcony talking about something he doesn’t even remember. What he remembers how happy you were, how enthusiastic you talked about it, whatever it was. Somehow though the conversation shifted, and you both ended up fighting – the reason for it was so stupid and it was all his fault. He was just in a bad mood that day and not even your warm presence were able to change it, so he let it out on you. Trying to push you away, again. Xiao cursed himself for how often he did that, how often he would hide how much he loved you, how much he cared for you, behind a mean exterior that only caused you pain. You knew what he was doing and that day, you just had enough. “Stop trying to push me away, Xiao!”, you shouted at him, tears already filling your eyes. You tried to reach for him, but he pulled away. Keeping you at a distance, again. “And you just stop talking, it’s exhausting to hear your voice.” Xiao already hated himself immediately after he said it, but looking back now, knowing what his words caused… it drove him close to madness. “Fine,” you replied, and he could her how much his words hurt you, “then you’ll never hear it again.” With that you left him. He tried to distract himself from the guilt he felt after your fight with his work, slashing through the enemies, spoiling the earth of Liyue with more blood. For nearly a month he didn’t hear you call him, and he was too scared to seek you out. Scared that you wouldn’t want to see him, scared that he ruined it all. When you finally called for him, when he finally heard you say his name – he hoped it was a chance for him to make it up to you. Xiao was not prepared to find your lifeless body, realising that you called his name with your very last breath. It send him into a blind rage, killing the enemies around him that were the cause for your death. When there was nothing left to kill he collapsed next to your corpse, tears spilling from his eyes, chanting your name over and over like a prayer. Asking himself why you hadn’t called him sooner to only remember what he said weeks prior. It was his fault. He couldn’t help it but to blame himself for your death. If he hadn’t said those words, if he hadn’t continuously tried to push you away… you were right. Xiao will never hear your voice again.

He avoided to go even near the place you died. If he hadn’t done that, if he had visited at least once, he would’ve seen your ghost, wandering aimlessly around. At first you were just confused, what had just happened? The last thing you remembered is that you called for Xiao and now? Now you stood in the middle of a forest, no Xiao in sight but also the enemies who cornered you just now were also gone. For how long you wandered around, confused and not sure what had happened you didn’t know. It scared you. You screamed his name, over and over again but you couldn’t hear your own voice. You just couldn’t make a sound.

He didn’t mean to come across that place again. Xiao learned to live with the guilt and grief he felt, just as he had to learn to live with his karmic debt. Still, it hurts more than he likes to admit. So when he stumbled upon the place he lost you all those years ago, he asked himself how he ended up here again. Something was telling him he should come here, but he tried to ignore that voice, that calling. But when he saw your ghostly figure between the trees of the forest, it used to be a plain field when you had died, he froze. Was it really you? “(Y/N)?”, he called out to you. Oh, how long he hadn’t said your name. It felt foreign, but also so familiar at the same time. But you didn’t hear nor see him, you were too lost after years of roaming the fields that grew to a forest – not being able to understand that time passed, that you were dead. Xiao came closer to your ghost and saw how you screamed something, over and over. His name. It was his name. “(Y/N) it’s me, I’m here. Please, I’m here, it’s okay”, his voice was strained and when your face met his – Xiao noticed how you didn’t look at him. You looked right through him, he noticed now how he couldn’t reach you with his words nor his presences. He tried to grab you, but his hand only touched the air. If he could at least hear you call his name. Xiao felt how his tears ran down his face, his heart shattering again in thousand pieces. Why hadn’t he noticed it earlier how you roamed the earth, lost and scared. He saw it in your face. Why didn’t he come here earlier? It pained him to know that you hadn’t found your peace. Xiao went down on his knees, face buried in his hands. The last time he felt so helpless was when he found your dead body, unable to help you. And now? Now it happened again, he had no idea what he could do to help you, to make you see him. From that day on Xiao spend most of his time watching over your ghost, hoping that one day he’ll hear you call out to him again.

[clouds-rambles]

hello!~ o(〃＾▽＾〃)o

can i request headcanons for kaeya, diluc, childe, and venti on what they would while their s/o dies in their arms? (if thats okay with u <3)

thank u sm! :))

BESTIE THE PAIN I FEEL RN!!! Omw to make hurt some of my faves hope you enjoy <3

Also guys I’ve been here for a day how are there almost 50 of you following?!

Pairings; (Separate) Kaeya, Diluc, Childe, Venti x reader

Warning(s); hurt, big hurty, reader death, vague wound description, cursing, talk about dead bodies

Keep reading under the cut!

Kaeya

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. You were meant to live forever with him. You were supposed to grow old with him and become a parent to your future children. You were-

“Kaeya” you choke out smiling at your partner above you. The man shakes his head mentally pleading with you to not die “Kaeya I will always be on the wind” you tell him, a shaky, bloody hand raised to his cheek to weekly caress it

“Please” he pleads “Please don’t die on me [name]” you smile at him feeling the breaths in your lungs disappear

“I’m sorry Kae--ya” you apologise before passing away in his arms

He doesn’t move for a long time. He doesn’t feel for a long time. The one person he could share his secrets and his love to gone. Away with the wind

Kaeya doesn’t remember the last time he cried, but he’ll remember this one. 

Your beaten, bruised, broken, dead, and beautiful body slumped in his arms as his tears fall from his face as he feels an absence in his heart

How is he supposed to live on if this is the pain he feels right now?

Jean eventually stumbles upon Kaeya out in the wilds, still clutched to your now cold and even more lifeless body

Jean manages to get the man up with your body held close to his chest

“Jean, I can’t, I can’t let them go” he pleads as if he’s waiting for you to simply wake up in his arms

“Kaeya...” Jean says in a concerned tone having never seen him in such a state, even he seemed to quickly recover from his fathers death

Eventually Jean coaxed Kaeya to go back to the city and leave your body in the hands of the sisters. Where they dressed you up and prepared a funeral service for you

The funeral was larger than Kaeya was expecting, you had affected a many more people than he realised from your small jobs around the city. Kaeya can’t help but be awed at how many people you’ve helped while you were in Mond

The usual chatter of Mondstat is quiet and in a time of grieving for about a week or so, many people have wonderful memories of you and Kaeya seems to be collecting them all, that and bunches of flowers. Many of which find themselves laying on your tombstone as Kaeya tells you about his day

A month passes and it seems like everything's back to normal, Kaeya is back to his outgoing self. He spends more nights at the tavern, but even Diluc doesn’t have the heart to cut him off. 

Jean seems to pick up on the smallest things, goddamnit Jean, the extra nights at the tavern, the eyebags, the weeping she can hear from his room. In it’s own right is heart-breaking, the acting Grandmaster cannot imagine what it’s like to be actually experiencing that kind of pain

-

Diluc

No, not like this

You had both decided that night to join each other in your little vigilante escapade. Which was fine you had both done this before, but tonight resulted in something very different

Here you are, head on Dilucs lap. This could be considered romantic, and often was, were it not for the fact you felt like you choked up a mixture of your lung and your bloody supply

“Diluc” you speak with a much worse for wear voice, the red-head looks into your eyes, eyes already gaining moisture. A similar scene has befallen him before, a Diluc knows how this ends

“Please” he pleads his voice wavering “Please don’t leave me” he chokes back a sob and tears fall off his face the salt hitting your own

“I love you so much” you start, Diluc shakes his head. Must you hurt him so with last words? “Don’t blame yourse-” another set of hacking befalls you as you lose more blood

“Please” he pleads again as the grip you had on his arm goes slack indicating your loss of life

Diluc screams, he cries and he hugs you close. He screams into the air of Mondstat until his voice hurts and he cries until all he’s doing is dry sobbing and he holds you close until you’re broken body is pried from his own broken mind

A wondering Jean heard his screams into the night sky and hereby answered them. She never expected to see Diluc, still in his vigilante getup, crying over your body

She calls for more guards who take your body from his and Jean helps Diluc get back to the estate. At one point during the walk Jean can feel DIluc shaking and hyperventilating. So they stand for a moment, Jean holds and comforts the wine-master before they move again

Jean has never seen such emotion from Diluc before, and she wholeheartedly hopes she’ll never have to see it again. Seeing Diluc so raw and rife with emotion is enough to make anyone cry. And Jean nearly did on more than one occasion.

Your funeral is small, much to Dilucs request and really only were attended by the estate and Jean. Diluc didn’t want to cry again in such a large audience

Though the maids often hear pained sobs coming from Dilucs room as he contemplates and often blames himself for what had transpired. Maids daren’t speak up about what they hear though, Diluc’s pain is more than understandable

Diluc throws himself into work opting to man the bar most days of the week and fighting for the city as often as he can. People around him are more than concerned

Diluc’s stoic nature seems to be intensified now, not wanting to let another person in and die in his arms. He’s seen enough death for his life and wishes not to lose more loved ones

Everything seems to have moved back to what life was before you arrived in your life, depressive, monotonous, boring, mundane for the most part and sad. So very sad

He wishes for a day where his heart isn’t strife with grief, but he doubts that day will not be coming anytime soon

-

Childe

You grin up at him, feeling close to naught pain coming from the gaping wound thanks to the excess of adrenaline that’s pumping through your body

“Childe” you say the smile still on your lips in an attempt at not making the situation as dark and horrific as it is. Childe speaks your name in return

“I love you” you tell him mustering the strength to cup the mans cheek, who immediately nuzzles into it. The situation almost doesn’t feel real to him. He’s going to be shaken awake by a very unwounded you in just a moment and inform him he’s having a nightmare

But that moment doesn’t come. Nor do any words come from you. Your slow rhythms of your heart remind you that he’s still got time, but you’ve expended all your energy. Your smile you’re wearing seems to be dropping

“I love you [name], I love you so much, you are everything I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you” he rambles bringing your body to his chest

“Live for--- me” you sputter out into his chest, a dying wish that Childe isn’t too sure he can uphold. Is it really living if he’s an empty vessel.

You go limp in his arms and he can no longer sense your heartbeat. Death had finally laid claim to you

Childe sits with you for hours, you’d expect him to be wailing like a banshee if you knew his personality but that’s rather not the case. Sobbing quietly is a better word for what happens. Most of his sobs and hacks for air are hidden in your hair. He pulled your body to his shoulder just to weep

Eventually he finds himself mustering the courage to walk back to Liyue Harbour. You firmly held in his arms. He knows that if he walks too plainly the Millelith would pry and ask too many questions for his fragile heart to answer

Childe ends up barging into the wangsheng funeral parlour, which surprises Zhongli a little. He’s about to go on a rant to Childe about how he must book an appointment, until he sees your lifeless body in his arms

The funeral is arranged quickly and neatly. There aren’t many people who attend, Childe is okay with that, he secretly wants to see his family and cry on their shoulder a bit

Instead he opts for a letter, which arrives to the family tear stained and lacking the usual penmanship ‘I’m sorry, you won’t be able to see [name] after all. They passed away not too long ago...’ he basically writes your arbitrary in the letter. And his whole heart is in every word he writes

Determined not to let anybody in Childe finds himself in a pattern, when he’s not throwing himself into battles he’s doing paper work or yelling at his subordinates and when he’s not doing that he’s doing his weekly fight with the traveller. Childe gets next to no sleep and instead opts to reading and rereading every letter and note you’ve ever given him

If Childe passes out at his desk nobody bothers him either in fear of getting yelled at by the harbinger or an understanding of losing a loved one

They never said being a harbinger was fulfilling work. Yet, he let himself believe that he could be fulfilled and content with a lover. What a shameful lie

-

Venti

He’s awfully quiet. He hasn’t experienced death in so long. Especially one he thought would be forever.

He couldn’t even get to you to hear your last words. Ironic isn’t it? He hadn’t heard that guys last words either. And yet this pains him so much more

Sure mortal lives are fleeting but he was certain he had more time with you. More time to see you grow old, more time to put off your inevitable mortality. More time to-

He’s hyperventilating, Venti’s body shakes as he finds nothing to ground himself not even the person he loves so dear is there for him. He feels like he could explode, breaths caught in his throat refusing to surface and come up for air. Despite being an immortal archon, the breaths that refuse to surface don’t fail to make him feel like he’s choking

A bard he is. And one that knows every song from the past, present and future. Suddenly the pained songs from the future make sense to him. He knew what was written. A love lost

Suddenly he finds himself crying and hunched over your deceased form making promises to the wind that he’ll never forget you. Much like he’ll ever forget that bard

He isn’t sure how long has passed but he’s still sobbing over your form, there aren’t many tears left for him to cry but he can’t find himself stopping. He feels like they’ll never stop. 

Maybe he could lay beside you and sleep for another thousand years. But that would only delay the inevitable. The inevitable sinking feeling.

Maybe it was his fault for letting himself fall in love with a mortal, but in the moment he could truly see you living life with him. He could see a marriage, children. He wanted you to have it all.

Damn celestia and all things above for not letting you ascend, at least when he inevitably ascends you’ll be there to greet him. Curse that and your mortality

Jean eventually stumbles upon him during a recon mission to find him covering your body in various flowers, a crown made of cecelias don your head. He’s quiet, but he’s saying goodbye. Who would blame him? Jean doesn’t interrupt him and only wishes you a farewell

News of your death spread around town like wildfire, your grave donned with more flowers than Venti can count. He almost feels bad about not doing a public service after seeing how many people are truly in mourning

Diluc doesn’t push Venti to pay his growing tab no matter how much he should. And Diluc doesn’t say no to Venti singing his happy tunes in the tavern

It feels like his life has retuned to normal. Though Jean can’t help but look out the library window to see Venti sat atop his statue with an expression, as Jean can only guess, of sadness.

Venti finds himself going back to an old schedule again but he can’t miss the nagging feeling of somethings missing. The something being you

Sometimes he half expects you to hug him from behind, or join him up at the statue, or kiss him on his nose, or-

Venti can’t quite comprehend how he feels, he just knows there’s a hole in his heart where you belonged. And he doesn’t want to let anyone find their way into there

He doesn’t want to lose again

It’s happened too much

[emeraldiis]

Falling for a God

A/N: Forgot to properly post/format this fic, so here ya go ya filthy animals (ok but i wrote it so I’m filthier)

AO3 Link

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 7.1k

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Summary: “Tell me, does being touched by a god make you nervous? I can feel you quivering, are you afraid?” Loki pauses, then leans down until his lips are almost touching your ear. “Or is that arousal I sense?”You have a huge crush on Loki, there's lots of sexual tension, y'all fuck. That's the plot.

“Nat,” you whine. “I feel like you’re not even listening.” You prance to the front of her, spinning around to walk backwards.

Natasha rolls her eyes. “Wow, are you sure you aren’t pyschic?” She keeps up her brisk pace, and you nearly trip over yourself trying to keep up.

“That’s so rude!” You exclaim, but can’t hold back a giggle. Despite her cold demeanor, you know that Nat is just messing with you. Shooting a quick glance backwards, you decide that your path is clear, and return your gaze to your friend. “You’ll tell me if I’m about to run into something, right?”

With a wry grin, Natasha gives you a thumbs up. You beam at her. “Anyway,”  you continue. “I started watching this new TV show last night, and it is so, totally awesome. There’s this guy, and he has these badass powers, and he’s fighting this girl, and she has-”

Thump.

A small oof escapes from your mouth as your back collides with something solid. You pitch forward in surprise, and yelp as you try to stabilize yourself before you fall. Large, warm hands grab your waist, tightening around you to keep you from toppling over. You sigh in relief as your frantic heart slows to a normal rhythm. “Wow, thanks,” you say, and spin around to reveal the identity of your saviour.

Piercing blue eyes meet yours, and your breath catches in your throat. “Careful, pet,” Loki murmurs softly, a sly grin spreading across his lips. His hands slide off of your waist, making contact with the sliver of skin between your shorts and your top on the way. An involuntary shiver creeps up your spine, and you bite your lip.

The reaction doesn’t go unnoticed by the ever-perceptive trickster, and his eyes flash with surprise. “Are my hands really that cold?” Loki teases. “Perhaps you could help me warm them up.” His tone is playful, but there’s something deeper underneath his banter that makes you think he’s actually flirting.

You can tell that your cheeks are red, and you choose not to respond to Loki’s question in fear of making an even bigger fool of yourself. A stammered apology tumbles from your lips, and you look back towards Natasha with a look of betrayal. She grins and shrugs. “I forgot to warn you. Oops.” Your mouth drops open. That scheming little devil. She knows about your crush on Loki, and she still allows you to make a fool out of yourself?

Your interactions with Loki were sparse, to say the least. Aside from a few casual conversations in a group, you had barely even talked to him. Still, he captivated you from the very first day he arrived at the compound. He was exactly your type; tall, dark, and brooding. Aside from Thor, most everyone gave Loki a wide berth, hesitant to forget the battle for New York. You, however, didn’t see a villain. You saw pain behind those blue eyes, and could empathize with Loki’s behavior. You knew all too well that it hurt to live in someone’s shadow, and sometimes acting out was a cry for help. Granted, Loki’s outbursts were far more drastic than yours had ever been, but it was more or less the same on a base level. And, the fact that he constantly had a witty remark on the tip of his tongue never ceased to entertain you. The man liked to hear himself talk, and damn, so did you.

It takes you a second to realize that you’ve been staring. You clear your throat awkwardly and look to the floor, eager to hide your discomfort. “Um, thank you for catching me,” you manage. When you look back up, Loki is wearing an odd expression. His pretty eyes are narrowed, searching your face. The scrutiny only embarasses you further. “Well, see you around!” WIth that, you dart around Loki and scurry off. Natasha follows you, snickering softly.

When you reach the common area, you plop yourself down on the couch and groan, throwing an arm over your face. Natasha sits down beside you. “Smooth,” she says, drawing out the word obnoxiously.

You remove your arm from over your eyes and give Natasha a withering look. “So not funny.”

Nat positively cackles at that. “Oh, come on,” she says. “He’d be an idiot to not at least have a thing for you, I mean, you’re smoking! ” She looks you up and down. “Nice rack, too.”

A giggle bursts from your lips. “Nat. Oh, my god. Stop objectifying me.”

Shaking her head, Natasha replies, “Me, objectify? I would never.”

That earns her an eye roll from you. “Sure. Anyway, can we please change the subject? I’m sick of talking about my embarrassing Loki crush.”

“What does ‘crush’ mean?”

You freeze. Now that was a distinct voice. “Thor,” you choke out. “When did you get here?”

Thor walks up behind the couch and swings himself over the back, making the poor piece of furniture creak in protest. He settles next to you, effectively sandwiching you between him and Natasha. “Just long enough to hear you discussing my brother. Now, will you please enlighten me on this strange Midgardian term?”

Before you can shut him down, Nat pipes up from the other end of the sofa. “It means she likes him. Romantically. Sexually. ”

The temptation to throw yourself onto the floor wailing is high. Instead, you opt to beg for your life. Still embarrassing, but slightly more productive than throwing a tantrum. “Nat!” You screech. You turn to Thor with pleading eyes. “Please, don’t say anything to him.”

Thor furrows his eyebrows. “What an odd expression. You’d think that the word “crush’ would be associated with something negative.” He places a big hand on your thigh. “If what Lady Natahsa says is true, then why would you not tell my brother? He is quite vain, you know. I’m sure he would be delighted to know that a beautiful woman is attracted to him!”

You groan and bury your face in your hands. These Asgardians will be the death of you. “It’s not that simple, Thor. What if he rejects me? I’d never be able to show my face around him again!”

There’s a pause, and then Thor asks you in a much gentler tone, “It seems as though you care for Loki a great deal more than you are letting on. Are you really afraid of embarrassment, or is it the heartbreak you fear?”

You’re glad that your hands are covering your face, because the way the color drains out of it at Thor’s question would have given you away. “No,” you mumble through your fingers. But he’s right, you do care for Loki more than you’d ever admit. His image ran through your head at night when you were trying to sleep, and his voice was what came to mind when your fingers were between your legs and you were pretending they were-

You rub at your eyes, then look up at Thor in desperation. “Please, if you really care about me as a friend, you’ll keep this secret.” You shoot a look at Natasha. “You, too. I may not be able to take Thor in a fight, but I could kick your ass.” You know you sound like a pathetic teenager, but you’re past the point of caring. You were perfectly happy admiring Loki from afar, and didn’t want to get your hopes up just to be met with shame.

Natasha scoffs. “As if.” Before she can continue. Thor holds up his hand.

“Lady Natasha, I believe we should stay out of this. I have done a great deal of meddling in my brother’s life, and I’ve learned that even the best intentions can cause disaster when Loki is involved.

“Thank you, Thor,” you say gratefully, relief evident in your voice. With a tired sigh, you hoist yourself up from the couch and turn to face your friends. “Well, I think I’ve had enough excitement for today. I’m going to hibernate, see you next spring.”

Natasha giggles and blows you a kiss goodbye while Thor scrunches up his face in confusion at your joke. Oh, well. Maybe he’d understand Midgardian humor one day.

*

Thunder rages outside your window while you toss and turn. You roll over to glance at your clock, and scowl when it flashes “3AM.” Giving up on the prospect of sleep, you opt for creeping to the kitchen for a midnight snack. Your bare feet pad down the carpet, and you shiver slightly at the cold air of the hall. Goosebumps rise on your bare legs and you start to regret your decision not to put on pants.

To get to the kitchen, you have to walk through the common area, and for a moment you linger just outside the entryway. There’s a soft glow coming from the corner of the room, and you mentally groan, hoping it’s one of the female inhabitants of the compound. You weren’t too excited at the idea of walking past one of the guys in just a sleep shirt and underwear. Still, your mission for food is not one you’re willing to give up on. Taking a deep breath, you step out of the hallway and into the room. And nearly pass out.

Across the room, perched in one of the loveseats, is Loki. He’s sitting with his legs curled underneath him, thumbing through a book. You consider darting back into the safety of the hall, but you’re too late. Loki has already noticed you, and is now staring far too intently for your liking. Suddenly feeling very exposed, you tug on the hem of your shirt, trying to pull it further down your legs. “Sorry to disturb you,” you whisper, afraid to break the deafening silence. Loki raises an eyebrow at you, then turns back to his book. You aren’t sure if you’re relieved or disappointed when his gaze leaves you.

Not wanting to linger in the entryway any longer, you make your way across the room, keeping your eyes down. As you pass Loki, a loud clap of thunder booms outside, and already being on edge, you yelp. Startled from the deafening sound in an otherwise quiet room, you stagger, falling backwards onto the loveseat. Right next to Loki. The sofa is small, and in your splayed out position, you’re almost half on top of the god.

Loki flinches away, and you immediately begin to apologize. “I am so sorry. I don’t know what happened, I guess I just lost my footing. Did I hurt you?” As you talk, you push yourself off of Loki and cower into the other side of the loveseat. Some more rational part of your brain urges you to get up, give him some more space, but you don’t listen. As embarrassed as you are, you’re not quite ready to give up this closeness to the object of your affection.

With a huff, Loki straightens himself and gives you a cool look. “You did not hurt me, mortal. I was simply surprised.” Then, having composed himself, he smirks and sets his book on the end table beside him. “I suppose it is only natural to have weak knees in the presence of a god.”

The comment lightens the mood, and you find yourself relaxing next to him. “You’re right, Thor’s thunder does make me a tad unsteady.”

At that, Loki stiffens, obviously having not expected you to return his teasing. For a brief moment, you feel proud. Then, something changes in his expression, and he scoots closer to you. His hand finds your bare thigh, and the contact sends butterflies through your stomach. Loki senses your restlessness and gives you a predatory grin. “Is that so? Are you telling me that this,” he squeezes your thigh, and you gasp. “Doesn’t make you feel...faint?” His voice is low, and he almost purrs the last few words.

You fight hard to keep your breathing even, not wanting to give away just how flustered you are. The heavy weight of his hand feels heavenly, and you can feel your panties grow damp. God, you hope he can’t smell it.

This predatory tone is so much different than the playful teasing that you usually receive from Loki. You’ve never seen his blue eyes so dark, and the unfamiliarity of it all tightens your stomach.

Taking your silence as a challenge, Loki presses himself even closer to you. His fingers creep up your leg, closer to your underwear. “Tell me, does being touched by a god make you nervous? I can feel you quivering, are you afraid?” Loki pauses, then leans down until his lips are almost touching your ear. “Or is that arousal I sense?”

Fuck. A full body shiver skates across your skin, and despite your best efforts, a small moan breaks free from your throat. Loki’s hand feels like a brand on your thigh, sending waves of heat up your body. The warmth pools between your legs, and you can’t help but shift a bit. Knowing that your panties are the only barrier between your soaking heat and the sofa, you arch your hips ever so slightly to keep from soiling the cushion.

Of course, your small movements don’t go unnoticed. Loki’s eyes are hooded as they rake across your bare legs, and you can hear his breathing get a bit heavier. He looks up at you, pupils dilated. “Oh, pet, look at you. Barely even touched, and already-”

He’s cut off by the sound of footsteps echoing through the hall, headed in your direction. Loki curses softly and reluctantly draws his hand away, then moves as far away as the small sofa allows. Your skin aches at the loss of contact.

The interrupting stranger’s footsteps approach the entrance to the common room, then carry on past. You let out the breath you didn’t know you’d been holding, thankful that you wouldn’t have to explain anything. Something tells you that, while there’s nothing going on now, sitting with Loki in the middle of the night might raise a few eyebrows.

You and Loki are alone again, but the moment has passed. Whatever spell that had overcome the two of you is gone, and all that’s left is a quiet room and a dim light. “I apologize, I believe I have overstepped,” Loki says, and for the first time, he sounds...unsure. His voice has lost that arrogant confidence that it normally carries, and he sounds like a child that has just been caught stealing cookies from the jar.

You bite your lip and risk a glance at Loki. He’s still pressed against the opposite arm of the loveseat, and is avoiding your eyes. Without the atmosphere of desire from before, now you just feel...awkward. Sighing softly, you rise to your feet and make your way to the hallway. You pause briefly in the entryway, and breathe out a “goodnight, Loki.” You don’t wait for a response, instead turning and trudging back towards your room.

As you flop back down in bed, you replay the night’s events over in your mind. It almost feels like a dream, and you’re having trouble believing that Loki, the God of Mischief, had actually come on to you. It didn’t seem plausible. You’re just a plain mortal, nothing special, no powers. Sure, your combat skills could rival Natasha’s, but besides that, you can’t find anything about yourself that would attract a god.

Eventually, you decide that maybe Loki was just horny, and you were in the right place at the right time. You did walk out without pants on, after all. No matter the reasoning, you know not to expect a repeat occurrence, given how regretful he had seemed afterwards. Tears brim in your eyes as the reality of the situation hits you; Loki regrets touching you. It seems that your crush was one-sided, and even though you weren’t surprised, that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

*

Things are tense around the compound. You creep around corners, terrified of accidentally finding yourself in the same room as Loki. And it seems that Loki is taking the same precautions, because you haven’t even seen a glimpse of him since that night. The ache in your heart from his rejection still keeps you up at night, and you still find yourself pining over him like a lovesick idiot.

Ever the observer, Natasha catches on quickly. “Are you really still embarrassed about bumping into Loki?” She asks after cornering you in the kitchen. “You’re not acting like yourself, and it is beyond obvious something is bothering you.”

You groan at her around a mouthful of a granola bar. “Are you really still thinking about it?” You counter.

Nat rolls her eyes. “Please, it’s hard to pretend it didn’t happen when you’re playing this stupid cat and mouse game. I see you check every room for him, I can’t believe you even care that much. He barely even touched you!”

A piece of your snack shoots down your throat with your gasp. You double over, wheezing and coughing. Natasha slaps a hand on your back, sighing. When you finally catch your breath, you glare at Nat. “Yeah, maybe that’s the issue.”

You immediately regret your words as a fire lights itself in Natasha’s eyes. “Want me to help?”

“Nat, hold on. No thanks-”

“Shush, trust me!” To your dismay, Natasha is already on her way out of the kitchen when she finishes hushing you. You whimper out a half-baked protest, but your friend is long gone by the time the words leave your mouth. Fuck, you’re so screwed.

LIfe  was very quickly becoming a stressful game of hide and seek. You’d resorted to spending most of the day in your room, hoping to avoid Loki, and more importantly, Natasha. You’re not sure what she has planned, but it can’t be anything good. As weeks pass by with no incident, however, you begin to drop your guard. Maybe she’s taking pity on you.

It’s around noon when you get the text. It’s an all caps message from Nat, pleading with you to at least hear her out before saying no.

That’s a terrifying text. I’m listening.

Nat: I may have bragged my way into a drinking contest with Thor, and I need a teammate to make it fair.

You want to try and outdrink Thor????

Nat: I want US to outdrink him. I convinced him that it’d be more balanced if it was 2 to 1.

You owe me.

Nat: :)

It was a terrible idea, but maybe a nice night of getting hammered is just what you need to break you out of your funk. Despite your initial reluctance, you find yourself getting excited. You hadn’t really relaxed in ages, this would be a good thing.

As the hours pass, you start to get nervous. It’s been so long since you’ve gotten properly drunk, and you seriously doubt you’ll be able to keep up with even Natasha. Still, a promise is a promise, and you have far too much pride to chicken out now.

The clock reaches nine o’clock, and you sigh. Showtime. Before leaving your suite, you set several glasses of water and a bottle of Advil on your nightstand. If you’re going to fuck over your future self, you might as well try to ease her pain. You take a deep breath and spare a glance over at the mirror against your bedroom wall. You had opted for something comfy, but cute; an emerald green dress that stopped just above your mid-thigh, and fell off of one shoulder effortlessly.

Okay, so maybe you had wanted to get a tiny bit dressed up. You’re sure Nat will tease you for it, but sometimes a girl just wants to feel pretty.

A bit breathless from those pre-competition nerves--yes, a drinking contest was that serious--you make your way to the kitchen. As you round the corner, you stop dead in your tracks. Sitting at the bar Tony had insisted on installing, is Nat and Thor, of course. But next to them, perched delicately on one of the stools, is Loki. He wears a look of disdain, as if this entire competition is beneath him. You hope he can’t tell how badly you want to be beneath him.

Natasha gives you a wicked grin as Thor waves you over, his smile far more innocent-looking than Nat’s, though you’re sure he had a part in this. Cursing your terrible friends under your breath, and yourself for falling for it, you trudge over. Naturally, the only stool left is the one on the end, directly next to Loki. You gingerly hoist yourself up and slide onto the seat.

You stubbornly keep your eyes on the counter, not daring to even glance up at Loki. It’s obvious from the way he’s angling himself away from you and towards his brother that he’s regretting that night, and doesn’t want to be near you. You don’t blame him, humans must seem like animals compared to gods. The reality is that you were a mistake to him, and you just needed to accept that and move past.

Breaking the awkward silence, Thor produces a jug of what looks like beer from god knows where. He grins and gestures to it grandly. As he opens his mouth to speak, you cut him off. “Hold up! I thought this was two against one? Loki being here makes it unfair.”

Natasha rolls her eyes at you. “Yeah, I may have bent the truth to get you to come out. It’s teams of two, but we have a handicap. Our drinks and shots count as twice the actual amount, and they’ll be drinking Asgardian mead. So,” She smirks. “No more complaints, let’s do this shit.”

You swallow nervously at the mention of shots. You could hold your liquor fairly well, but you and shots had...history. Nat knew how touchy you got when you were drunk, and how much of an oversharer you tended to be. Though you have to admit that her plan is almost flawless, you’re still unimpressed with her shenanigans. She’s pretty much set you up to embarrass yourself.

You twiddle your thumbs in your seat as Natasha grabs a bottle of Svedka from behind the bar and begins to pour the beginning drinks. Following her lead, Thor pops open his jug and splits it between two large glasses, then passes one to Loki, who sighs in apparent boredom. He shoots you an unreadable look, then grabs one of the shot glasses that Natasha filled and slides it your way.

With a mumbled “thanks,’ you gingerly take the glass, and look at Nat and Thor. Thor raises his glass. “May the better warriors win!” He announces, then tips back his glass. You roll your eyes at the word choice, but bring the shot glass to your lips and throw your head back. The liquor goes down rough, but you manage to keep your poker face and grit your teeth against any retches.

“The lady can drink!” Thor bellows, wiping at his face.

You shrug, wanting the spotlight off of you. “Um, I went to college?”

Before Thor can question you, Natasha cuts in. “Hello? I took it just as well, where’s my applause?”

“Natasha, you are not a lady,” Loki deadpans. Nat glares and pours herself another shot in response, throwing back the second one just as easily as she had the first. She then points at you. You can’t help the laugh that bubbles up. Despite everything, Loki was still Loki, and he still had your heart. It seems that the tension between you and Loki dissolves after you laugh at his quip, and he relaxes his stiff posture.

You sigh in relief and reach for the bottle to refill your own glass. This time, it goes down easier. That is, until the burns travels past your stomach, right down to between your legs. You squirm in place at the unexpected burst of arousal. Still, you should have been ready for it. Alcohol has always gotten you a little worked up. It was your mistake to believe you could fight it.

Despite the setback, you keep up with your teammate as the night goes on. Shot after shot, broken up by the easy conversation that emerges as the liquor continues to flow.

You’re not sure when the competition was forgotten, but you soon find yourself splayed on the couch next to Loki, laughing hysterically at some story he’s just finished telling about Thor in his youth. You look over at him, hazily trying to center your double vision to properly admire the god. His cheeks are flushed red from the alcohol, and he looks more relaxed than you’ve ever seen him.

Loki glances over, catching you staring, but you’re far too intoxicated to be embarrassed. Instead, you hold your gaze, waiting for a reaction. Loki smirks, then eyes his brother with annoyance.

“Brother,” he says, voice a lazy drawl. “I believe we’ve won this contest, wouldn’t you say?”

Thor cocks his head, then widens his eyes in understanding. “Oh, certainly! In fact, I think it would be necessary for me to walk you back to your quarters, Natasha.”

Natasha begins to protest, but it dies on her lips as her gaze flickers between you and Loki. “What a gentleman,” she purrs, only swaying slightly when she rises from her seat. “Lead the way.” Taking his outstretched hand, Natasha stumbles down the hall with Thor, giggling excitedly.

Now that it’s just the two of you, you expect things to get awkward, but find that you’re still just as comfortable. “Well, I guess I have to bow to the drinking champ,” you slur, sitting up to give a half hearted bow.

Loki throws his head back and laughs. “You,” he manages between snorts, “are far more fun to be around than most others on this planet.”

You scoff and wave your hand dismissively. “You’re only saying that ‘cause I bowed to you.” Chewing on your lip, you let your eyes drift back over to Loki. In your drunken haze, he just looks so...comfy. Before you realize what you’re doing, you slide over to lean up against him. Loki’s surprisingly warm, and you sigh contentedly, letting your mind wander back to how his hand felt running up your thigh.

The arousal from earlier that you had forgotten about rears its head, turning your sigh into a shaky exhale that is not at all subtle. The air feels thick, just like it had on that one stormy night, and you press yourself closer to Loki, unable to resist how good his body feels against yours.

Loki freezes for a moment, then seems to force himself to relax into you. His arm snakes around you until he’s holding you comfortably against his side. For one brief moment, you start to wonder if this is a good idea, given how things had ended in the past, but the intoxicated part of your brain tells the sober part to go fuck herself, and then you’re speaking without thinking. “Do you want to walk me to bed?”

Oh, shit. You can’t believe that just came out of your mouth. A wave of sobering panic hits you, and you untangle yourself from Loki and shoot up from the couch. Before you can flee, however, a pale hand grabs hold of your arm, stopping you in place.

Loki gets up, then moves his grip from your wrist to your hand. “I think that is a lovely idea. Allow me?” With the hand that isn’t holding yours, he gestures toward the hall. Well, that was unexpected. You try not to giggle in child-like excitement, and instead nod hurriedly.

Your heart speeds up at the feel of his hand in yours, and you start off down the hall, letting Loki pull you towards your suite. Caught up in trying to navigate the titling floor, you don’t notice that you’re being led the wrong way until the two of you come to a stop at a door that definitely does not belong to you. You look up at Loki in confusion. “This isn’t my room.”

“I know,” Loki growls, then opens the door and whirls you both inside. When you’ve recovered from the swift movement, you manage to pull away from Loki’s grip.

“What-what’s going on?” You say, attempting to sound stern. Loki stalks towards you. Instinctively, you back up, until you’re pressed against the wall with Loki boxing you in.

Loki presses his hands to the wall on either side of your head and sneers at you. “What’s going on?” He mocks. “I’ve craved your body under mine since long before our little nighttime meeting, and I have run out of patience for games.” He leans in and presses a kiss to your neck, grazing you with his teeth. Just like before, his playfulness has given way to a domineering aura, but you’re not complaining one bit.

You barely suppress a full body shiver. “But,” you protest weakly. “I, I thought you regretted it. I mean, you never said anything about it, so I figured...oh…” you trail off into a soft moan as Loki roughly licks up the side of your neck, growling.

“And when would I have gotten the chance?” Loki pulls away from his assault on your skin to look you in the eyes. “You have been avoiding me for nearly a month.” Those blue eyes are staring daggers at you, and you realize that there’s hurt behind all that frustration.

Your mouth goes dry. He’s right, but the eye contact from his smoldering stare is making you forget how to speak. Fumbling with your words, you cast your gaze downwards. “Yeah, I guess I have. But with what you said after we were interrupted....I thought you were uncomfortable with what happened.”

A dark chuckle spills from Loki’s lips. “The only discomfort you have caused me is the nights I have spent spilling over my own hand because I could not have you. ”

You gasp softly as Loki’s words send a wave of heat through your overheated body. Loki takes that as encouragement, and presses himself closer until his lips are grazing yours. “Tell me you don’t want this and I’ll leave,” he mumbles, eyes hooded.

Your response is to surge forward, hands flying to the back of his head as you roughly pull him in to kiss you. You both groan at the contact. The kiss is anything but gentle; your fingers are tangled in Loki’s hair, tugging harshly, and you can feel his teeth nipping at your bottom lip. It was far better than you could have imagined, and the dizzying pleasure of it all has you feeling drunker and more sober at the same time.

Before long, the room spins as Loki lifts you and hoists your legs around his waist. He kisses you breathless as he walks slowly down the hall towards what you can only assume is his bedroom. There’s a giddy part inside of you that squeals with excitement at being carried like that, but it’s quickly overshadowed by lust as you and Loki reach his bedroom. He tosses you onto his king sized bed like a doll, then kneels on the floor and yanks your ankles until your bottom is almost hanging off the bed.

Loki slides your dress up and nuzzles the inside of your thigh. “I could smell your arousal the entire night,” he says, nearly purring. “May I taste?”

You sit up on your elbows and stare down at him, face flushed with mild embarrassment at his face so close to your soaked panties. Dumbly, you nod, words failing you. Loki growls his appreciation and hikes up your dress, taking a brief moment to admire the soft fabric. “You look absolutely ravishing in green, I’ve wanted to tear this off of you since the moment I laid eyes on it.” And then he’s sliding your panties down your legs and plunging his tongue into your heat.

A ragged gasp tears its way from your throat and you throw your head back. You feel the grin form on Loki’s lips against your skin, and a fresh gush of arousal flows down your thighs. Loki eats pussy like it’s an art form he’s been perfecting for ages. His lips tug at your pussy, worshipping every fold like it’s the last meal he’ll ever have. You open your mouth to make some joke about his silvertongue, but all that comes out is a pathetic whimper as Loki drags his teeth lightly across your clit.

It isn’t long before the pleasure reaches its peak.You fight hard to keep your legs from clamping around Loki’s head, but you can’t help it when you crest over the edge of orgasm. Your muscles lock up, your back arches, and you scream. White hot euphoria explodes from your core, spreading through your body like venom. Loki’s tongue works you through it, slowing to wide, long strokes as you begin to come down.

You’ve barely recovered when Loki rises from his knees and crawls up your body, coming to a stop when his face is inches from yours. His eyes are hooded, and his glistening lips are parted to allow frantic, heated pants to escape. “Pet,” he hisses, leaning down to nuzzle into your shoulder. “You taste sweeter than the fruits of Asgard.” He bites at your collarbone, making you shudder in your post-orgasmic haze.

Still out of it, you sluggishly fumble at Loki’s belt. “Wanna make you feel good, too,” you mumble and lick your lips. Loki bats your hand away, shushing you.

“Darling, there will be plenty of time for that later. Right now, I need to feel you.” He grabs your shoulders and drags you up to the pillows, so that you’re lying comfortably on your back with him hovering above you.

Your heart skips a beat at the mention of ‘later.’ So this wasn’t just a one-night stand? You don’t have time to process that, however, as Loki barely gives you a moment to breathe. He sits back on his knees, straddling your waist, and with a wave of his hand, you’re both stark naked. Your hands twitch, wanting to cover yourself. Being naked in front of an attractive man has always intimidated you, but the fact that Loki was a god made it worse. As if sensing your sudden shyness, Loki leans in to kiss at lick at your breasts, and brings his hands up to pin your wrists to the bed. You sigh in pleasure, insecurity fading with every hot swipe of his tongue, not even wanting to struggle against his hold.

Loki lowers himself to grind against you. His hard cock slides against your dripping folds as his narrow hips press into yours. Both of you shiver, and you arch your hips to bring him closer. Loki growls against your skin and sits up. He lets go of your wrists, roughly grabs your waist and angles it to meet his. “Ready, pet? I can’t wait, I need to have you.” he breathes, eyes locked on yours.

Like a deer in the headlights, you’re frozen, anticipation coiling tightly under your skin. Slowly, you nod. Loki wastes no time. He smirks, then slides himself into you, the stretch burning in the loveliest way. Your heated groan mingles with his, and when Loki’s hips come to rest against yours, he falls against your chest, panting. You appreciate the time he gives you to adjust; Loki’s cock is thick, and longer than anything you’ve ever taken, and you can feel it throbbing desperately within you. Now that he’s released your hands, you bring them up to thread through his soft, black hair. He closes his eyes and leans into your touch, nearly purring.

“Tell me when, love,” Loki grits out, fighting to keep his voice steady. The shakiness in his usually smooth tone is arousing to no end, and you can feel yourself clench around him in approval. Loki’s hips twitch at the fluttering of your walls, and though you’re more than ready, you decide to torture him a bit longer.

You bring your legs up to wrap around Loki’s  waist, pulling him closer. He shivers, but keeps his composure, remaining almost statue still. His concern for your comfort makes your heart swell, but you want to see him lose control. “You’re so big,” you whimper out, the alcohol in your system quelling the embarrassment you’d usually feel when talking dirty. You press your face into Loki’s neck, grazing your teeth along the pale skin there.

With a deep growl of barely kept composure, Loki rises up to rest on his elbows, desperate eyes searching yours. It seems that being the God of Lies gave Loki the ability to see through your cruel game, and his expression turns dark, though the neediness is still blatant. You shift nervously as he stares you down, already regretting your mischievousness. “Feeling playful, are we?” Loki asks.

Your mouth goes dry at being caught and your core tightens around him again, earning you a flutter of his eyelids. “I…” you trail off, eyes drifting to Loki’s parted lips. Watching you gaze, Loki grins at you.

“Oh, pet. I think you may be confused. You are mine to toy with, not the other way around.” With that, Loki leans down to crush his lips into yours. His tongue forces its way into your mouth and you whine around it. While his tongue’s distracting you, Loki takes his chance to begin pounding into you at a ruthless pace, and you break away from the kiss to throw your head back and shriek out a moan.

You feel utterly wrecked, stomach clenching and nerves alight with pleasure as Loki continues his assault on your body. Your eyes are squeezed shut, so his teeth nipping at your jaw come as a surprise, sending a whole new shockwave of sensation down your neck.

“You feel so fucking good, pet,” Loki moans, his voice quickly losing its characteristic steadyness. He sighs out something that sounds suspiciously like a whimper, and brings one of his hands down to toy with your clit. Your legs tighten around him involuntarily. “A-ah, fuck,” Loki grits out, increasing his pace.

The pleasure is overwhelming, and the unhuman speed at which Loki’s pounding into you leaves you no time to catch your breath. Moans and whines erupt from your mouth in a constant stream, and Loki keeps his mouth hovering above yours to drink them in. “I wanna cum,” you whimper as Loki’s assault on your senses continues.

“Then cum, pet,” Loki groans, hips stuttering. “ Cum for your god.”

You keen, writhing and chasing your high. As you climb up to your orgasm, you are met with a startling realization that Loki has already ruined you for anyone else. No human man could match the fire that he’s set upon your nerves, the blinding pleasure that mounts with every thrust and kiss. With that settling into your mind, you finally reach your second peak of the night.

Your eyes try to flutter shut, tears brimming at the corners as you wail Loki’s name again and again. Through the haze of your climax, you notice Loki’s muscles begin to tense as he nears his orgasm as well, and you force your eyes to stay open in order to watch him come apart.

Watching Loki cum is almost like a second climax. He speeds up impossibly, mouth hanging open and eyes barely able to stay focused on you. “You’re mine,” he growls out. Choked moans fall from his lips as he nears the edge, and you rake your nails down his back to encourage him.

“Cum in me, please, I need it, make me yours” you ramble breathlessly.

“Oh, fuck, I-I’m so close,” Loki manages, voice breaking. You continue to coo pleas and encouragements at him, and the way his eyes roll back at your wrecked voice gives you an intoxicating rush of pride. Finally, with a whimpering moan, Loki stills, cock pulsing within you and hips twitching as he pumps you full of his cum.

Loki slumps against you, still moving in aborted little thrusts, as if he can’t quite stop fucking you just yet. The weight of him on top of you is heavy, but not unwelcome, and you take the time to bask in the euphoria of having just slept with the god you’d pined after for so long.

“That was…” you start, words failing you.

“Divine,” Loki finishes for you. He slides his cock out of your pussy, and with it comes a gush of warm cum that you’re sure will stain the sheets. He rolls off of you, then guides you onto your side so that he can pull you up against him.

You weren’t expecting Loki to be the ‘cuddling after sex,’ type, so having him spoon you was surprising, to say the least. He nuzzles his nose into your hair, and you find yourself wanting to fall asleep like that; comfortable in his bed and safe in his strong arms.

Still, there’s a nagging question that won’t let you fully relax. Not wanting to expect too much, you brace yourself for the worst and open your mouth to speak. “Loki...what does this mean for us?”

Loki tenses behind you, and your heart breaks at the assumed rejection as he begins to pull away. “Are you...are you not mine? I thought this was-I’m sorry, I must have misunderstood. Forgive me.”

This time, your heart breaks for a different reason. Loki sounds so hurt, so unsure of everything, and you can hear a scared little boy behind that velvet voice. “No!” You nearly shout, turning around to pull him back to you. “I want to be yours, I promise,” you say as you tug Loki back into your arms, running a soothing hand down his back. “I just wasn’t sure if that’s what you wanted.”

The relief in Loki is visible as he relaxes into you. “Love, I am yours as much as you are mine, do not doubt that.”

The pet name brings a smile to your lips. “I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you reply happily. Heart full, you roll back over so that Loki can snuggle into you again, and finally let your drowsiness overtake you. You catch a faint, ‘I love you,’ just before you drift off to sleep, and though it could just be your mind playing tricks on you, you know that you love him, too.

[obeiii-mee]

Hello! Can I request an hc about a shady MC who's not phase by anything in Devildom with the brothers (and Diavolo?? he deserves love!!!)? Like, when Luci's like "i CaN KiLL yOu hUmAN", MC's reaction was like "Oh... congratulations then." i need more shady mc who may or may not be planning to ruin your life😂😂 Thanks and take care!!❤❤

The Brothers + Diavolo with an MC that is not phased by DevilDom

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Pls I need more shady MC, they would not take any shit from the brothers. Put any Gen Z-er with these guys and you’ve got yourself a suicidal and reckless human exchange student.

They wouldn’t know what to do with one of those ahaksbakanhaka you’re right, Diavolo deserves all the love >:(((((((

You better take care too >:( thanks for sending me this big brain request. I’ve been preoccupied with other projects so I took a while to get to this ask. Hope you’re doing OK💙

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Lucifer:

-He thought having a human exchange student was going to be bad enough as it is but this…..this was so much worse than he could have ever imagined

-The moment you arrived, he already knew you were going to be a problem child and a persistent one at that

-Literally the first thing you asked him was : “Why do you look like an off-brand Levi Ackerman?”

-And he was left there, astounded, confused and offended because he had no idea who you were talking about (cuz at that point you hadn’t met the third eldest) and the tone you had was, frankly, pissing him off

-You kept wondering off on your own????? Without looking like you gave a shit even though you almost walked into a butcher’s shop that specialises in human meat???? Tf MC?

-Also really irritated that you couldn’t be intimidated and that DevilDom was like a playground to you, for some reason? Like, MC get out of the fiery pits of eternally tormented souls- this is Hell, not the McDonald’s ball pit ffs

-Things did not improve for him lmao, by the end of the first week he had already ripped out a good chunk of his hair because of you

-“MC, you should know by now provoking demons like this for no good reason is only going to make life harder for you. Keep this up and you’ll get killed in no time because of your behaviour.”

-“Great, can we have a hip-hip and a hurray?”

-In the span of one day, he’s had to come to your rescue six times (approximately) because you’re too nonchalant about your surroundings around literal creatures of hell

-He doesn’t have enough coffee or will to live for this bs

-“Lucifer, I found this dead plant and brought it here because it reminded me of you.”

-“…..sigh. Why? Why does it remind you of me?”

-“Because it’s cold and unresponsive.”

-He made the consecutive decision to ignore you

-(low-key kept the plant tho)

-Honestly, you get on his nerves a lot and he has definitely contemplated killing you in the past but at the end of the day he really can’t bring himself to do it

-We both know he tried a few times lmfao

-“I will tear you limb from limb, human-“

-“Can I finish my tea first.”

-“You…wait, what?”

-“You’re crazy if you think I’m letting this tea get cold. Try to kill time before I’m done and I’ll smash this cup against your head.”

-If you try hard enough, you might even elicit a laugh out of him, especially if your shadiness is directed at any of his brother which results in him patting your head affectionately

-Nowadays he’s just concerned because you seemed to have made an alliance of sorts with Belphagour and Satan and that’s not a good sign

-For his sake, if not yours, at least try to survive the year without getting chomped on by a random demon please

-He’s too stubborn to let you die just because you’re unbothered by everything so cut him some slack and help out damn it

Mammon:

-“Oi Lucifer, how come I’m stuck babysittin’ this stupid human?”

-“And how come I’m stuck with this asshole for a tour guide, with his fake ass designer shoes and no brand sunglasses. That’s a lot of smack talk from someone with crow shit stains covering the back of his jacket. Also, did you stick your hair in a bucket of mayonnaise?”

-……..

-He was so offended lol

-Normally, humans like you cower in fear whenever demons are as much as mentioned because of the whole “I can eat you whole” thing

-And here you are; insulting the Avatar of Greed and one of the princes of Hell himself just because you didn’t like his attitude

-Don’t worry tho, he warms up to you in less than a fucking month simply because you still come to his rescue whenever his brothers start insulting him and wow, look at that, his heart is now combusting on the floor

-“Y’all have no right to criticise Mammon when he has the most self control out of all of you.”

-“Since when does Mammon have any self control? He can��t keep himself from nicking anything that looks shiny.”

-“Motherfucker, I don’t see him trying to choke me to death, respectfully pls shut the fuck up. I don’t want to say I have favourites but if I do, it’s definitely him.”

-While Mammon’s in the background, with hearts instead of pupils in his eyes like ❤️👄❤️

-He doesn’t even mind running around after you anymore (will still complain about it though because your ass is in constant danger and he’s had enough)

-Honestly, you keep starting shit with random demons, some of which are quite powerful mind you, and you don’t back down even when he’s there to step in

-Would low key love to watch you fight one of your classmates at RAD and organise a ticket selling booth for the event but Lucifer will hang him a new one if he does

-So for now, he sticks to baring his teeth at the aggravator in question and you’re there, giving the same demon the middle finger

-The way you sometimes match his energy gets him so hyped up lmao

-“Mammon, did you steal Levi’s money again?”

-“T’s none of her business human. Now go away, shoo!”

-“Bitch, don’t ‘shoo’ me, I ain’t a bird. Now tell me, did you?”

-“…..Why do you ask?”

-“Because a new flavour of instant noodles just got announced, called ‘Super Hell-Sauce Flavour’ and I thought you might be more interested in that than wasting the money on gambling.”

-“….ok but only if you come with me to buy some.”

-This…this is true love right here

Levi:

-Oh no, now there’s two of you

-Why do I feel like his energy would match MC’s almost immediately? Maybe it’s because he spends too much time in his room on the internet like the rest of us do

-“What do you want, you stupid normie?”

-“300…..”

-“….300 what?”

-“300 mangas collected, thousands of episodes of anime watched, over 60 character figurines, plushies, body pillows, merchandise and several posters only to be called a fucking normie by a demon weeb that’s only known me for 10 minutes.”

-Boom, instant friendship

-He becomes attached to you almost immediately and now that he knows how unphased you are by DevilDom, he is seriously worried

-Hell, you’re making him consider going outside his room just to make sure you’re alive and not dead in a ditch somewhere because you decided to get on someone’s nerves that particular day

-Even during the quiz thing, when he almost kills you, you’re just sitting on the floor and awkwardly watching him as he throws a sissy fit

-Levi feels sort of conflicted with you because one one hand you’re good company and he loves having you around, you’re his Henry after all

-But on the other hand, you put yourself in so much danger it makes him paranoid so often to the point where he wants to keep you locked in his room and wrapped in bubble wrap

-Nearly had a heart attack when you almost walked right into a pit of lava like MC???? This isn’t one of his video games???? You’re not gonna respawn if you die????

-Besides all that, he gets a bit jealous of you confidence and your ability to just do whatever without fearing death or consequence

-“MC, how do you do it?”

-“Do what?”

-“How do you go about your life without a care in the world?”

-“I guess I’ll tell you my secret Levi. I’m not like other humans that’s why, I’m just so unique I do things differently.”

-“You sound like a pick me-“

-As long as you’re OK and not injured because of your carelessness, he’s indifferent about your behaviour and will even applaud you for your bravery when it comes to this sort of thing

-“lmao the human exchange student just dumped Solomon’s cooking in the trash while looking him dead in the eye 💀💀💀”

Satan:

-Your attitude towards DevilDom and demons in general kept him entertained, if nothing else

-You rarely seemed to consider how much of a threat that place really is and usually you were just running around, completely ignoring Lucifer’s rules and doing your own thing

-Which, you know, he’s all about

-I can’t say there were no incidents between the two of you

-With his short temper and your tendency to say things without caring about the consequences, there were definitely moments when he might’ve snapped on you

-“MC for goodness sake, what happened to my room?”

-“What do you mean?”

-“It’s an absolute mess! I just told you to bring me my spells and curses book, not mow through everything!”

-“It’s not my fault this place is built like a fucking labyrinth. You should be grateful I went to get it for you at all, I almost tripped and died several times on my way back. Also, you should get a new ladder for your shelves. It did the broken.”

-“MC….”

-“Yes?”

-“You are so lucky I love you.”

-Other than the fact his anger takes over him when things like these happen, he not so subtly encourages you to keep going because seeing Lucifer scowl at your antics gets him wheezing his lungs out

-I like to think Satan would be very impressed, even in the beginning, at the amount of nonchalance you can radiate at times

-I mean, you sure as hell don’t see it often and he loves how unpredictable you are more often than not

-If anything, he should probably thank you-idk how, but his patience has increased significantly every since you got here and he appreciates having some more control of his emotions

-“I’m gonna go put oil in Lucifer’s shoes.”

-“Do you have a death wish?”

-“Satan, I am old enough to make my own decisions and I concluded that this action is necessary.”

-“Necessary for what?”

-“Raising everyone’s morale! All of you seemed to feel down lately so I thought this would be fun for everybody!”

-“Except Lucifer, right?”

-“Except Lucifer. He grounded me from my D.D.D like I’m a fucking teenager who needs to be supervised-pssshht, I’m the most responsible one here.”

-“Yes clearly.”

-“Goodbye dear Satan, I may die today. But it’s for the greater good! (Dramatic exit with sound effects)”

-“WAIT MC!”

-“(pops head back in) yes?”

-“May I offer you my assistance?”

-You’re basically taking turns pranking his brothers and it’s hilarious

-Satan is not too worried about your well being simply because he knows his siblings and him are always going to be nearby to save you if you pull something stupid again

-Even so, he checks up on you throughout the day; just to make sure

-“Where were you?”

-“Running from a bunch of demons. Who wanted to go munchy crunchy on me, I assume.”

-“……”

-“Either that or people here are a lot friendlier than originally expected.”

-You can be such a handful and it really tests him, especially when he’s angry enough to begin with

-But despite your amazing talent at either getting completely lost around Hell, purposely walking into a prohibited place just because you felt like it or riling up others with how blunt you are, he still cares about you deeply

-You may be a pain the ass, but you’re his pain in the ass <3

Asmo:

-He should’ve known something was up with this particular human when you stood there, completely calm and collected, while Beel salivated at the thought of eating you on your first day

-Asmo just brushed it off for a while but it kept happening???

-The first time Lucifer ever told you off, you really went and said “Or what? Are you going to eat me? If so, you can go ahead and start with-“

-He came to your rescue and covered your mouth before you got to finish and before Lucifer unleashed his wrath on to everyone in that house

-“OOPSIE! I think MC has been spending too much time with me. Sorry Lucifer, we gotta run now! We have a party to attend, don’t we MC darling?”

-“You mean the one hosted by the guy that tried to kill me because I shoved into him on the hallway at school and then proceeded to tell him to go fuck himself right back into whatever hell hole he was born in before you came and charmed our way out of it?”

-“Yes.”

-“Ah OK. “

-You’re tiring for sure but you’re not exactly unlikeable

-You have a certain charm hanging about you that Asmo loves

-“I almost died like…30 minutes ago.”

-“WAIT WHAT?? WHY?? WHAT HAPPENED-MC ARE YOU OK???”

-“Yeah, I almost drank some poison today because someone told me it was water. It smelt off though so I didn’t.”

-“….”

-“Anyway, I got you this bracelet on my way home.”

-He really does wish you would take things a bit more seriously

-This is your life on the line, you know? What would he do if you died?

-“MC, you’re not immortal, you can die so much more easily than I can, you know that right???”

-“I don’t care.”

-“Well I do! And you should too….”

-A lot of people don’t see past his vanity tbh, because he can be such a caring person towards the people he loves

-The amount of videos he has of you appearing to be completely calm while pure chaos is descending in the background is pretty impressive

-Every time he uses his charm on you to try and get you to commit his sin, it just doesn’t work???? For some reason???? And even if it’s just with simple, innocent affection for now, he is determined to tempt you into it

-“MC~gimme a hug!”

-“But that’s social interaction and I don’t support it- do you have a charger for my D.D.D by any chance?

-Or at least die trying to ig

-Asmo loves having you around but you’re giving him wrinkles and that’s not okay >:(

Beel:

-The moment he realised how carefree you actually were, he sort of started checking up with you quite frequently throughout the day

-It’s his way of protecting you but if he could, he would follow you around all the time

-Becomes your body guard because you may not care enough about your safety but he certainly does so get ready to be carried everywhere

-You will not get hurt nor will anyone mess with you if he has a say in it and let me tell you, he does

-Thing is, his brothers mostly know him for being slightly dense in some aspects of day to day life

-He’s not perceptive of things that don’t involve food or his loved ones

-And because you most definitely are a loved one of his, he does notice how careless you are really often

-And it scares, rather worries, him because DevilDom is an incredibly dangerous place-even with all the precautions they had taken when you came

-“MC get down, you could fall.”

-“But Beel, look-I’m finally taller than everyone else! Taller than you even! Hey, should I do a backflip?”

-He has no idea why you thought jumping from 60 meter high cliff into a small river of squashed demon blood was a good idea but he wasn’t going to risk anything just because you felt like showing off your diving skills

-Proceeds to carry you away, completely unfazed

-In this case, I feel like Beel is not someone who gets bothered by the horrible things happening around there either

-As long as he has food and his family is safe and happy then he’s also happy, as mentioned above

-But he knows he’s alright with DevilDom because he’s been living here for centuries now

-A bit curious as to why you’re so unbothered

-And even more curious as to why you weren’t terrified of him transforming in his demon form after he lost control when he found out you ate his pudding

-Or more like Mammon did and pushed the blame on you

-“YOU. ATE. MY. PUDDING!”

-“Beel I love you but if you did not just see Mammon shoving the damn container in my mouth two seconds prior to this, then you might need glasses.”

-He apologised to you later for it but even so, you didn’t seem to mind like at all and he didn’t really understand why

-Unless you end up explaining why exactly you feel so indifferent about your life being in potential danger, he won’t really pry

-But now he has even more reason to follow you around like a lost puppy

-Since it’s clear you don’t really care about protecting yourself

-So now it’s his job to do it

-MC protection squad? Mostly Beel and Mammon

-ahhh he cute

Belphie:

-Oh

-You piss him off so much

-He’s trying to have his moment, you know?

-Finally getting that glimmer of satisfaction after killing a human as a way to avenge his sister’s death

-Trying his hardest to make it as miserable as possible because he has so much rage in him, he needs you to suffer

-“Harder Daddy-“

-“Oh fuck off.”

-Nah but for real, what the fuck MC

-Why does he even bother, he feels like he should be sleeping instead of dealing with your bullshit

-Even afterwards, when your future self shows up and he tries to kill you again, you look more thoughtful than irritated???

-Lucifer and Beel are literally holding him back from doing another Chocky on you and you’re standing there, looking at him with your eyebrows raised

-“Hey Belphie, I have a quick question. I know you’re trying to kill me and everything but do you like the colour blue?”

-“HUH??!?!”

-“It’s a simple yes or no question Belphie. Do. You. Like. Blue?”

-“WHAT DOES IT MATTER???!!!”

-“BELPHAGOUR, AVATAR OF SLOTH-YES OR NO, JUST FUCKING ANSWER!”

-“YES! FUCK YOU!”

-“Ah ok thanks. I like blue too :)”

-????????????

-Pls he felt like sticking his foot down your throat

-As of late, he’s kind of glad he didn’t manage to scare you away that day and that he didn’t traumatise you or something

-At the time, he was mad because he didn’t understand why you weren’t scared but now he just wants to make it up to you

-“You didn’t deserve any of that. I’m sorry MC, I won’t blame you if you decide to stay away from me now.”

-“Stfu dipshit, what’s gotten you so depressed? Did you have another fight with Beel? I told you not to eat the last slice of cake.”

-“Rude ass, I was trying to apologise for my past mistakes-let me repent will you?”

-“Said no demon ever. Now let’s go hang out you emo bitch.”

-Y’all vibe together on a spiritual level once that shit gets sorted out

-But he’s kinda scared you might pull out a knife on him ngl

-Obviously, you’re still annoying as fuck with that indifferent attitude of yours but he can live with it

-He appreciates the fact that you’re not scared of him, even after what he’s done

Diavolo:

-Ah yes, the future King of DevilDom himself

-He’s very enthusiastic about the idea of you having fun this year…..and to keep you alive….

-He, of course, expected a range of reactions from you when he first summoned you here

-None of which were “Ok but could you not have given me a heads up? Before the whole teleportation thing? I face-planted your onto marvellously polished the floor and now I think I lost even more brain cells than before.”

-He felt so bad gagajajahahwgehhsb

-He apologised for bringing you out here without any warning like that and then proceeded to introduce you to everyone

-Diavolo is actually kind of relieved to see you’re handling everything pretty well

-He thought that maybe DevilDom was too much for a human to deal with

-Meeting Barbatos also went incredibly smooth

-“Barbatos? The one that cleans the floors right? Big fan of your work, I could eat off the floor of the main hall.”

-He’s so glad to see you getting along with everyone and not getting intimidated by the brothers

-It gets him excited thinking about how the exchange program is gonna work and all three realms will be united

-But he’s not stupid so don’t think he’ll allow you to stumble around, getting up to all sorts of mischief

-He always has someone watching you because he would hate to see you die, despite being pretty fond of your carefree attitude

-“MC, please be careful. Most demons here aren’t all that nice.”

-“Aye aye Captain.”

-He fears that many demons would take your indifference as a challenge and try to assert dominance or something by kidnapping you

-As far as creatures of hell go, they love installing fear in people

-So he always keeps an extra eye open for you

-And he’ll be there to help you if something goes wrong

-But other than that, he’s pretty chill as well and he finds you so hilarious, it’s been a while since he’s seen someone as eccentric and dramatic as Mammon and Asmo

-Idk what else to add here, Diavolo is very accepting and as long as you don’t get hurt, he’s glad you can get used to your new surroundings so easily

———————————-

Al~

[skipps-writes-for-gojo-satoru]

Updated 24/6/2021

∞ Oneshots/Scenarios

Trying to wake him but only to be cuddled

Gojo & S/O take Megumi as their son

S/O not used to compliments 

Taking pictures of his  S/O

S/O Insecure of their relationship

Sees his eyes for the first time

S/O who’s having an anxiety attack

S/O wiping Gojo’s kiss

Gojo wiping S/O’s kiss

Comforting a sad S/O after a mission

S/O wears Gojo’s shirt

S/O makes Gojo eat spicy food

S/O who helps Gojo (MANGA SPOILERS)

Comforting a sad S/O

Comforting a sad S/O 2

Ex to Lovers

Reader most romantic confession

Gojo’s Birthday Fic 2020

Comforting stressed S/O

Geto kidnapping Wife!Reader

Dog!Gojo Satoru x Reader

Comforting childhood bestfriend 

Husband material

Flower giving

If only I had somewhere to sit

Mommy kissing Santa Claus

Comforting Gojo

Gojo having a nightmare

Cheering up his S/O

Gojo making reader laugh in a meeting

Clingy in the morning 

In the shower

One of These Nights

From Behind

Gojo caught crying

A Taste?

Early Mornings

Gojo & the twins wanting another baby I

Gojo & the twins wanting another baby II

A Promise

Reader getting her period and Gojo notices

Lazy & Affectionate

Telling him you’re pregnant

The Gojo twins visiting Jujutsu HIgh

∞ Headcanons

Engagement Headcanons

Chubby S/O

Gojo turned into a child

F!Short & Strong S/O

Newborn curse reader

Curious childlike reader

S/O who is good at hand to hand combat

Cuddling Headcanons

Pregnancy Headcanons

Reader afraid of rejection

Tall & Strong Cursed Spirit

Suicidal Reader 

Long haired reader

Big sister reader

Affectionate S/O

Celebrate reader’s birthday

Toxic lover

What does Gojo Satoru smell like?

Working out 

Type of girl Gojo would fall for

Pregnant reader wants to decorate for Christmas

Gojo wanting a baby

Gojo trying to make stotic!reader smile 

Gojo Twins #1 

M!Strong & Short S/O

S/O memory loss

Popular F!Reader

S/O turns into a child

Shy S/O

S/O protects Gojo

Clumsy S/O

Day off with Gojo

Shopping with Gojo

Valentine’s Day

Insecure skinny S/O

Gojo x Idol!Reader

Agrument with his S/O

Merman!Gojo

∞Skipps Imagines

Why?

My Everything

A Moment

Afternoon Naps

I’ll be here

∞Random Gojou Satoru Headcanons Series

1   2   3

∞  SFW Alphabet

SFW Satoru Gojo Edition

∞ Prompt Event

Fluff # 12 “Could you say that again?” “Were you listening?” “No I was, I just like hearing your voice”

Fluff prompt #26 “You’re really warm.”

Fluff Prompt # 1 “Is that my shirt?” “You mean our shirt?”

Fluff Prompt # 44 “You’re an idiot.” “But I am your idiot.”

Fluff Prompt #19 “ You know, I think my (mother/father/parents) would be proud if I brought (you/him/her/them) home.”

Fluff Prompt #18 “You come here often?” “Well considering I work here, yes” #27 “Are you blushing?”

Fluff Prompt #4 “Kiss me.” & #13 “ I didn’t think it was possible to love someone this much.”

Fluff Prompt #7 “You’re an idiot.” “But you love me.”

Fluff Prompt #10 “Stop moving and let me braid your hair!”

Fluff Prompt #39 “You’re safe now, I’m here.”

Fluff Prompt #9 “You took all the pillows so I’m using you as one.” #26 “You’re really warm.”

Fluff Prompt #31 “I’m never gonna to leave you. I promise” #44 “You’re an idiot. But I am your idiot.”

Fluff Prompt #4 “Kiss me” and General Prompt #17 “Are you jealous?”

Fluff Prompt #30 “I’ve been in-love with you since we were kids.”

Fluff Prompt #16 “Can you just please hold me ?”

Fluff Prompt #7 “ You’re an idiot.” “But you love me.” General #17 “Are you jealous?”

General prompt #46&#48 “Are they really just a "friend”? “I won’t hurt you”

General Prompt #2 “It’s pouring rain, why are you here?” #50 “I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

General Prompt 17 “Are you jealous?”

General Prompt #17 “Are you jealous?” & #25 “She doesn’t belong with him!” “Than who does she belong with?” “with me…”

Angst prompt # 28 “Move out of my way before I make you”

Angst Prompt #12 “Maybe they were right, you never did change.” & #14 “ Don’t you dare walk away from this!”

Angst Prompt #21 “It’s (her,him,they), isn’t it?” & #36 “They warned me about this.” “About what?” “You.”

Angst Prompt #6 “You’re lying to me again. Why can’t you just tell me the truth for once?"

Angst Prompt #47 “ You deserve so much better.” #48 “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave.” 

Angst Prompt “If you love me please let me go, please…”

∞ Winter Prompt Event

Winter Prompt #1 “What do you mean we’re out of hot chocolate?”

Winter Prompt #2 (Cuddling by the fireplace)

Winter Prompt #13 “Your hands are freezing!”

Winter Prompt #14 “ Aren’t you cold like that?”

Winter Prompt #17 (watching movies under a pile of blankets)

Winter Prompt #18 (snowball fight)

Winter Prompt #22 (kissing in the snow)

Winter Prompt #32 “There’s no way I’m letting you spend Christmas alone.”

Winter Prompt #37 (stuck in a snow storm)

Winter Prompt #38 “ You’re under the mistletoe so stop stalling and just kiss.”

Winter Prompt #43 “What do you mean Santa’s not real?”

Winter Prompt #50 “Those were for Santa!”

Winter Prompt #54 (Winter power outage) Gojo Satoru Edition

Winter Prompt #56 “Shhhh, don’t tell her/him!”

Winter Prompt #60 “I feel like there’s more frosting on you than on the gingerbread.”

Winter Prompt #10 “Where did all this mistletoe come from?” #61 “What are you doing with that mistletoe-oh.” #64 “I guess… this is when we kiss?”

Winter Prompt #65 “No, we’re not getting a puppy for Christmas. Stop. Asking.”

Winter Prompt #66 “ You don’t put marshmallows in your hot chocolate? YOU HEATHEN”

Winter Prompt #68 (Winter Proposal)

Winter Prompt #70 “You’re perfectly welcome to kiss whoever you wa-”

Winter Prompt #72 “Did everyone else come with a date?”

∞Smut Prompt Event (1k Followers Event)

Smut Prompt #21 “You’re bigger than I expected.”

Smut Prompt #54 “ You’re going to regret that, sweetheart.”

Smut Prompt #55 “Were you dreaming about me again?”

Smut Prompt #1 “We’re in public, you know.”

Smut Prompt #3 “Can you help me with this zipper?”

Smut Prompt #28 “Oh god, how can you manage to switch from cute to sexy in under a second?”

Smut Prompt #53 “What do you mean not yet? You can’t expect me not to cum when you’re fucking me so good!”

Smut Prompt #16 “Forget the bed. Let’s fuck right here.”

Smut Prompt #11 “You’re really gonna make me beg for it?”

Smut Prompt #5 “Are you trying to turn me on right now? Because it’s working.”

Smut Prompt #44 “If I have to pull over, you won’t be able to walk for the next week.”

Smut Prompt #46 “You’re not allowed to cum without my permission.”

Smut Prompt #6 “I’d hold on to something it I were you.”

Smut Prompt #27 “Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?”

Smut Prompt #42 “I know for a fact you’re a lot louder than that.”

Smut Prompt #41 “I’m gonna fuck you so hard that you forget you ever even met that asshole.”

Smut Prompt #39 “ Angel in the streets, freak in the sheets.”

Smut Prompt #15 “Try to keep quiet. We don’t want to get caught.”

Smut Prompt #48 “Holy shit, you’re so fucking sexy like that.”

∞Physical Affection Prompt

Physical Affection Prompt #11 (Back hugs)

Physical Affection Prompt #1 (Pats on the head)

Physical Affection Prompt #9 (Wiping away their tears)

Physical Affection Prompt #18 (Wiping food away from their lips)

Physical Affection Prompt #23 (A hug some might consider too long)

Physical Affection Prompt #7 (Squishing their cheeks)

Physical Affection Prompt #8 (Brushing hands by accident)

Physical Affection Prompt #15 (The biggest warmest hug)

Physical Affection Prompt #13 (Kissing someone’s forehead)

Physical Affection Prompt #6 (Chasing after their lips after they pull away)

Physical Affection Prompt #25 (Playfully biting)

Physical Affection Prompt #4 (A hug after not seeing them for a long time)

Physical Affection Prompt #21 (Accidently knocking your head against their chin)

Physical Affection Prompt #22 (Kissing their cuts/bruises/scratches)

∞Incorrect Jujutsu Kaisen Quotes

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #6 #7

∞  Skipps Art

Random Gojo 1

Cat ears for Gojo

Dog Hybrid Gojo

Happy New Year 2021

Mochi Gojo

1k Followers

2k Followers

[randomrosewrites]

I would like to request Xiao getting sick and the reader has to take care of him! uwu thank you in advance <33

a/n: You can! Sick fics are my guilty pleasure, I hope I did Xiao justice <3

Under the weather

Pairing: Xiao x GN reader Summary: Xiao falls sick, and tries very hard to not let a certain someone help him out. Words: 1.5K Tags: Sickfic, fluff, comfort, Xiao acting tough when he's really a huge softie <3

Xiao is a person who rarely gets sick. Him being an adeptus contributes to that greatly.

…key word being rarely.

There are times, where despite eons of fighting and surviving the worst wounds, his immune system fails him, and he falls sick. He detests it. It makes him feel weak. His body feels miserable and his senses are dulled for a couple of weeks afterwards. Worst of all, it brings out that sympathetic, woeful look from others, which he despises. The last thing Xiao wants is for mortals to take pity on him.

So, when he wakes up with a sore throat and a persistent cough that refuses to go away, he continues with his day as normal, refusing to let some minor bug affect his job. He eats a quick breakfast, grunts a good morning to Ver Goldet at the front, and heads to the balcony to get to work.

The rain that pours from the sky stops him dead in his tracks. Of all the days to rain, when he’s feeling bad enough as is. He glares at the sky, dark clouds showing no sign of stopping. The last thing he wants to do today is to spend the day fighting monsters in the torrent, but duty calls.

Sighing deeply, he tightens his grip on his jade polearm, grits his teeth, and steps out onto the marsh.

---

Eight hours later, when he returns, dripping water, shivering, and exhausted, he knows he’s overdone it.

He barely makes it past the threshold of the inn and into his room, collapsing onto his bed wet clothes and all. He feels awful and his cough is so bad that it steals all the breath from his lungs.

He knows he should get up, at least to strip himself of his clothes, but he just can’t find the strength to do so. It’s like his limbs are made of stone, weighed down and heavy.

Rain continues pattering against the roof, and below, Xiao can almost make out the sounds of guests talking. It’s comforting. Background noise that puts him at ease. He’s never been fond of complete silence, nor an excessive amount of noise. Xiao closes his eyes, curling himself up in a ball on his bed. Sleep pulls at his mind, making his ragged breathing steady.

He’s so out of it, he doesn’t notice another presence in his room until he feels a pressure on his head.

Terror shoots through his veins and Xiao leaps up, clumsily drawing his polearm into his hands. Too slow. He hisses to himself. He’s right. A hand wraps around his wrists, easily twisting the weapon out of harm's way. He’s considering kicking the intruder in the chest when a familiar voice grounds him to a halt.

“Woah! It’s just me, Xiao,” your eyes are wide with shock, maybe even a hint of fear.

He blinks up at you. There are no enemies. His weapon disappears in a flash of light. “What the hell. You shouldn’t sneak into other people’s rooms.”

“The door was open,” you defend, letting go of his wrists after a moment. “And the carpet was soaked all the way from outside. What happened? You sound awful.”

“I got wet.” He coughs, squeezing his eyes shut. “Agh – do you need anything? Or can I be alone?”

You frown, starting at him so intently that he averts his gaze. “You’re sick.”

“And what if I am? That’s not your concern-”

You’re already turning away before he’s finished his sentence. He wonders if you’re just going to go out the front door and leave, until you turn into the bathroom, your voice calling from inside, “I’ll run you a bath.”

What.

“What?” he asks. “Why?”

“Because you’re sick. Just stay right there, it’ll be ready in a second.”

“I don’t need you to run me a bath like I’m some…” his skin heats with anger. (Or maybe that’s just his fever.) “Child.”

“You’re not. I don’t think you are. I’m just helping you out,” you say simply.

Xiao releases a breath, clinging to his stubbornness. “I don’t need your help,” With his nose plugged, it doesn’t sound half as intimidating as he wants to be.

Your response is light and tender, almost understanding. It makes Xiao’s throat tighten. “I know, Xiao.”

He doesn’t know how to respond to that, so he sits on the edge of his bed, listening to your shuffling. The water runs and after a few minutes, you exit, sleeves rolled up to your elbows.

“It’s all set, go in whenever you feel ready.”

Xiao gets up, clearing his throat. “Alright.”

He probably should say something else, but he doesn’t know what else to say. So, he awkwardly shuffles into the bathroom, feeling his cheeks burn as he closes the door behind him. The bath is fancier than anything he’s ever taken. A few bubbles foam in the water, and if his nose weren’t plugged, he’d be able to smell the fresh scent of Fontaine bath salts.

He strips quickly and carefully lowers himself into the water, sighing as the knots in his muscles unravel. He lets himself soak for a bit longer than necessary, slowly scrubbing his skin, only getting out once the bath starts to lose its heat. The steam does wonders for his breathing. By the time he dries himself with a towel and changes into a fresh set of clothes, he can breathe through one nostril again.

When he exits, you’ve gotten the blankets changed and are sitting in a chair by the side of the bed. A magazine is open on your lap, one of the ones that came with the room that he’s never read. You close it when you see him.

“Why are you still here?”

“Because you’re sick and need someone to care for you,” you turn, digging around in your bag by your feet. “I also want to take your temperature.”

He folds his arms and does his best to seem imposing. “I’ve survived for eons without the need for anyone else, what makes you think I’ll let you take care of me now?”

“I’m not asking,” you sit up, and with all the patience (or stubbornness) Xiao’s ever seen, pat the bed. “Come here, Xiao.”

He hesitates a minute more before ultimately giving in, planting himself in front of you. A thermometer is placed in his mouth, which he begrudgingly accepts. The chills start to return, so he picks up one of the blankets carefully folded at the edge of the bed and wraps himself in it.

His nose isn’t working, so it comes to a shock when he sees the steaming bowl of miso soup on his bedside dresser, boiled bits of soft tofu floating in the broth.

“Is that…mine…?” It sounds silly the moment he says it out loud, and curses himself for it.

“Mhm. I had the staff bring it up when you were in the bathroom. It’s plain, so it won’t upset your stomach, but I want to get some medicine in you before you have any.”

A bath…food…medicine…he almost feels sick with how much care you’re treating him with.

“This is stupid…” he murmurs as you pour a vile of red liquid into a small medicine cup. He has half the mind to tell you mortal medicine won’t work but knowing your stubbornness, he wouldn’t doubt that you’d gone ahead and purchased special medicine from the pharmacy in Liyue Harbor.

“Stupid is going out into the rain and catching a cold,” you quip back. There’s no aggression to your words, he almost feels bad when he responds with a snarky comment.

“I was already sick before I went out.”

You stop to stare at him, narrowing your eyes in a way that makes Xiao’s insides turn, before sighing. “Stupid is going out into the rain when you were already sick. Give me the thermometer, please.”

His temperature is high, by both mortal and adeptal standards. You force him to swallow two tablespoons of medicine that tastes like ashes and he manages a few spoonfuls of the soup before his stomach protests. He wraps the blankets around him, frowning when you get up and tuck the sheets around his body.

“I didn’t need your help.”

You brush the bangs from his forehead. Xiao’s eyes flutter for a brief moment. He doesn’t push you away. “Whatever you say, Xiao.”

“Let me finish,” he snaps, before collecting himself. He really needs to stop doing that. “I didn’t need your help, but…I appreciate it.”

Your eyes widen a smidge before a small smile spreads across your face, making Xiao’s temperature rise even more.

“You’re welcome, Xiao. Sweet dreams.”

You sit by his bedside until he falls asleep, feeling the safest and more comfortable than he’s ever been in a while. Xiao doesn’t dream anymore, but if he did, he knows it would have been a peaceful one.