#I'm really proud of it despite all of its flaws

[maniacmaniac-19]

Do you have pictures of this moonlight dress project?

Ah! sorry! I saw this message a few days ago but I didn't have any pictures or time to pin it back up on my dress form, but here she is now!!

I am very new to sewing so I am incredibly intimidated by this project!! But it has been so fun to work on

and if anyone is wondering why I chose certain things/styles, I'll put more under the cut so I don't bog anyone's dash down, haha

I’m using a 1910s wedding dress pattern, which has been a fun challenge, as the pattern is partially in French and the instructions basically just amount to “put it together.” And the sizing is for someone a lot smaller than me. Also, I’m altering the pattern to better fit my vision lol

I’ve been seeing a lot of fun analysis on trying to figure out when the book takes place, and I’m not quite sure where I stand on that, but I have been making this dress with the idea that the fashion setting is somewhere between 1909 and 1914. Regardless of whether it’s pre or post WWI, the fashion in Deerwood seems to me (based on some online research, I am not a fashion historian) to be set around that time, with the older members of the family dressing even older and Olive wearing her hair in what sounds like a Chignon style that was popular in the 1910s, “pulled low on her forehead, with puffs above the ears.”

So either fashion in Deerwood is real behind and/or there’s some anachronistic factors (e.g. the cars). Either way, I feel like this pattern is really fun to use because both this pattern and younger Valancy’s imaginings of a future wedding dress prominently feature orange blossoms. And even tho the version I’m creating doesn’t have that, I just think it’s a neat connection.

I shortened the sleeves to have a less Victorian vibe and the skirt is a bit of a different shape and obviously not as long. I’m also using some homemade lace I found at a thrift store instead of the orange blossom trimming so that is a fun touch. Not sure if I'll leave the waist bare or add some more thrifted homemade lace tho

But yeah! I'd love to hear what anyone thinks! I am very new to sewing tho, so apologies if I blind anyone with my bad techniques!

[st0rmyskies]

What Your Favorite Link Says About You

A.k.a. The Links as tarot cards/your rising sign/your blood type.

Time

You're likely an older Zelda fan. Ibuprofen has become a food group for you. Anyone who thinks OoT isn't the greatest Zelda game has you clutching your pearls and tutting. Kids these days don't know how good they have it.

You are a person to whom young people come for advice, either in your career or in life in general. You're happy to give it, especially because you love to help, but on the inside you're silently screaming, What?? Why me???

You may have trouble sleeping through the night. Even if it's not every night, there are some where you just can't turn your brain off and worries or worst-case scenarios just keep playing and replaying ad nauseaum.

You enjoy time in solitude to appreciate the beauty of nature. I bet you know how to braid a mean daisy crown.

“The flow of time is always cruel...” - Some event in your life took your innocence from you, perhaps much too early. You grew up quickly because of it.

Legend

Either you had a crush on the emo kid in high school or you were the emo kid in high school.

You might be jaded by the world, but you still have a solid work ethic and a soft heart despite it all. Even if you hide it all beneath a healthy layer of sass.

You possess a multitude of skills, not all of which are related. Anytime a friend needs a piece of clothing mended or a picture frame hung on the wall or a leak in a faucet addressed, you have the tools and the willingness to help.

Either you have a history of moving frequently when you were young, or you have a restless spirit. You may never quite feel 'at home' in any given place.

"But, verily, it be the nature of dreams to end." - You’ve suffered a meaningful loss in your life and you have a hard time opening up again because of it. 

Hyrule

You root for the underdog, or perhaps you are the underdog. Any of those "against all odds" stories just hit you square in the chest.

Somewhat quiet by nature, you do vital work behind the scenes but you aren't the type to seek out a leadership position. Leave the limelight to somebody else, please.

You might sell yourself short when it comes to your skills and abilities, but you should believe in yourself, man! You can do it!!

You have a capricious streak in you that rears its head now and again. That smile can look sharp and devilish in the right light.

"It's dangerous to go alone!" - You either already have or are destined to find 'that one person' with whom you can open up and truly be yourself. 

Twilight

I'm willing to put money on the fact that Twilight Princess was your first Zelda game.

You have a strong sense of justice and get really bent out of shape when you encounter unfairness or flaw in the system, whatever that may be. You might be considered an outsider in some way because of this.

You're the friend who scoops spiders up in a cup and sets them outside. Live and let live.

You were the 'wolf kid' in middle school. Come on, those amazing tie dye shirts? Wolf Woman? Julie of the Wolves?? Even if you kept it inside, it was there in some way.

"Your current power would disgrace the proud green of the hero's tunic you wear." - You put a lot of stock in the opinions of others and hold yourself to a higher standard because of it. Sometimes that standard isn't achievable, though, so try to be kind to yourself. 

Sky

You, my friend, have a soft heart. You're generally a happy-go-lucky sort of person. You're likely to make excuses for those who've been mean to you in the past and come out as friends on the other side.

You're crafty, or at the very least good with your hands. You're the type to give someone a handmade gift rather than go buy something for them for their birthday, a holiday, etc.

You have a strong affinity for your friends. If anything bad were to happen to them, you'd turn violent at the drop of a hat.

You may have some level of chronic illness that affects you. Although you might do things in a different way or at your own pace, though, you still come out on top.

"You fight like no man or demon I have ever known." - You have the capability for great things. World-changing sorts of things. Don't give up!

Wild

You're some flavor of neurodivergent, if I had to guess I'd say ADHD. You have 42 tabs open in your brain at any given time and you have no idea which one the music is coming from.

You're an incredibly creative person, although you might have trouble finishing tasks/works-in-progress. Doesn't mean you didn't learn something along the way!

Rigid guidelines or deadlines stress you out. You'd rather be given a goal and decide for yourself when and how to get there. When you do have a deadline, you're a bit of a procrastinator.

Sometimes you don’t get the 'right' way to do things, but you carve your own path--although sometimes it's unorthodox--and get there in your own time.

"Courage need not be remembered, for it is never forgotten." - In spite of how your life changes you, for better or for worse, you have a driving inspiration or ethic or vocation that moves you forward at all costs.

Warriors

Those who don't know you well tend to boil you down to one or two trite traits. In reality, you contain multitudes. Most people couldn't handle all of you, not that they deserve to know even part of you.

You tend to lay it on thick--be that your charm, attitude, or whatever else your social shield might be--because you're hiding some deeper secret or insecurity at your core.

You're the mom friend or the planner in your group, or perhaps you're the oldest child. You’ll pass on an authority role if and when you can, but likely you’re still involved in some supervisory capacity in a given situation. 

You kill spiders with fire. Show NO mercy.

"You dare raise the blade of evil's bane to me? So be it. Hyrule's blood will be on your hands." - You have strong convictions and you aren't afraid to take risks, major risks, to do what you know to be right.

Four

Babe, if you ain't short, you've got short person energy. You scare me a little bit tbh.

You were praised for not being a problem child growing up, or for being very responsible at a young age.

You have a vivid imagination! You may have had an imaginary friend as a child or lived in your own little world altogether. I bet your notebook pages were strewn with little doodles in school.

You're a lover of information. If you could choose between an afternoon at the library or a movie matinee, it would be the former.

"Hanging around with you fools is dangerous for my health." - You're the snark friend, aren't you.  

Wind

You are extroverted to a fault. You need the company of others to recharge that social battery. The quintessential golden retriever friend.

You had active involvement in the music and theatre department. I'd be surprised if you weren't in at least one show in high school.

Having adventures is where it's at! You're a big fan of travel, either cross-country road trips or international flights. You could happily live out of a suitcase.

You tend to make friends easily wherever you go. If everyone in this classroom/workplace/bar doesn't know your name already, they will pretty quick.

"I have been waiting for you, boy... Do not betray my expectations.” - Against all odds, you've proven yourself to be worthy of great things. Screw what fate has in store! You're the type to take your own destiny by the 'nads.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - It's 2024 & I'm talking about TayNew... really?

(They pretty much told us all to sit down and shut tf up, 'cause they got this. AND THEY DO.)

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Feb 2024 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube grey) ep 9 of 12 - I broke. In my defense, it was Monday, I needed comfort, and TayNew were right tf there. Ya know what? They are great in this show. It's a great adaptation. I might like it more than the JBL live action. You know why? Really, honestly WHY...?

That was a PHENOMENAL KISS. Those boys did Thailand fucking proud. They did fandom a solid. Thank you OGs for reminding us how it's done. I was getting used to SloppyHot. And SloppyHot has its place, but that TayNew rooftop kiss was a top tear class act. It was tender and sweet and respectful and joyful. It was eye work and breath work and years of practice. How very far BL has come while still staying so much the same. TayNew - I salute you!

(Read all about distribution issues here.)

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 12fin - we waiting, I guess? Bah.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - The recipe book thing was so damn cute and I love a claiming. YOU KNOW I LOVE A CLAIMING!

In fact, I love OffGun.

I love food based BL.

I adored seeing a reboot of "the infamous dragging". 

But I don’t love anything else about this show. Sigh.

1000 Years Old ep 1 of 12 - Finally we get our gay vampire BL from Feel Good Bangkok. Stars Shane (My Engineer) and fresh face Opal, directed by Champ (2gether). It’s kind of odd but enjoyable. A group of teen UFO seekers find a vampire instead. Opal looks a bit like a mix between Newnu + Leo (VIXX) - so cute + edge. Also, nice to see Shane again on our screens after so long. 

Finally, I like the subtle (and sometimes not subtle) presence of ghosts permeating this show. Do the friends know she's there? Do they know she's dead? Is the existence of paranormal accepted but not that of aliens? Or are the two combined? Is this lazy writing or just fun world building? Who cares! It's enjoyable.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 12fin - the nail painting bit was very cutie queers and I've not seen it done in BL before, so that was nice. For some reason captions never dropped for me on this last episode, but it didn’t really matter. Not much happened and I understood everything anyway.

Quick pitch?

From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night based on a y-novel, about a young man nursing a heartbreak who has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. This turned out to be a pulp that wasn’t half as good as it should have been and even less memorable, but not terrible. 5/10 DON'T BOTHER unless you're v bored

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 12 - Oh it is such a pulp: the acting is not good and the script is terrible. Of course, I’m mildly enjoying it. Very good dream kissing. There's something appealing about these main characters - I think it's the moot crushes. We rarely get to see that. These days everything feels very one sided, this... isn't.

A Secretly Love (Thai WeTV) - Khonprot, a third-year hazer of the engineering faculty, has a secret crush on Pluem, a tsundere fourth-year head hazer. Over the years, he's seen Pluem cycle through girlfriends. Recently, after a public breakup, however, Khonprot thinks maybe a boy has a chance.

I tried but I can't get into my WeTV account anymore and I'm way too lazy to figure it out. I'll catch it grey if I can, since I've rebooted the bootlegging side of my BL life for Cherry Magic anyway.

So this show may stay in this section, or I may bump it down to "it's airing but..."

If anyone is watching it, let me know if it's good?

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 7-8fin - Ugh it was GREAT, despite some pretty telling flaws. I ended up feeling like some of the filming was amateurish (very overworked low angles - director's first feature, I assume), and the narrative is a little disjoined and on the nose, AND the subs are clumsy (which I don't expect from KBL) BUT I still loved it. (FYI - I wouldn't be so harsh on a BL for this kinda thing except one from Korea.)

Quick pitch:

This isekai-based KBL is about a man who must win a game by convincing a reserved teen outcast to fall in love with him. Of course, that teen represents himself and his own unhappiness. Like many queer narratives, this show is actually about self worth, trust, and found family, and it is VERY on the nose. But I don’t expect subtlety from my BL and I enjoyed it's truly lovely redemption arc and earnest performances. While I found the narrative a touch disjointed with overworked filming angles and poorer than average captions, this is certainly much better than early KBL in terms of consistency of tone, script, and immersion. Highly rewatchable and charming, which counts for a lot. 9/10

Trigger warning for suicide depicted.

Perfect Propose (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 4 of 6 - Gosh, it’s so lovely. But I do just constantly want to give them both hugs. 

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Oh look, Taiwan has created yet another BL where I spend most of the time watching it grinning like an idiot. Surprise surprise. The pet name thing was fucking adorable. Also Taiwan once more proving they come by their "kings of kissing" title honestly. I mean to say. In a week of good kisses this one was just... WOW.

On the other hand, some of the underpinning themes are starting to v worry me (ownership, consent, age), and we only just got started, and I don't trust this production company so... I have concerns.

But also... YAY KISSES!

(I'm made of weak moral fiber.)

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - Like many other shows on this list. I just enjoy it the most when the two leads are on screen together. So this episode was kind of lacking because they were apart for most of it. I also am starting to agree with the tone of the plot, that maybe they ARE better off as friends not lovers. (And I'm sure I'm not supposed to want that.) Oh Japan, must you?

My Strawberry Film (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 8 - Oh it’s good. In the arthouse lane so don’t expect sweetness & light or an HEA. If there’s no cartoon aspect to a JBL, there’s usually no joy. But it is certainly good. Teens uncover some old film and a mystery around a pretty girl. The background music is wildly annoying (and rarely in the background). 

It's Done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam, it's on YouTube. I will give it a try when I have a window of time.

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - A Burmese BL? @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) - Gave me Luminous Solution vibes have decided not to watch.

It's Airing But...

Dead Friend Forever (Thai iQIYI) - rumors are it's interesting. I'm waiting to know how it ends.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - dropped it at ep 4.

Next Week Looks Like This:

2/24 Unknown (Taiwan Youku) 12 eps - Older brother tough guy breadwinner looks after his sister and defacto adopted little brother. Little bother falls in love with him and is sent away after a stolen kiss. But when he comes back…

Sam Lin has a cameo so even if I wasn't already excited, I'm in. We should be on our guard though, Taiwan will occasionally go edgy, dark, and sad... this could go there.

One assumes GMMTV is filling in the BL time slot with something queer on their YT Channel after Cooking Crush ends, they gonna lose subs if they don't. But I've not been paying attention to the chatter so I don't know which of their line-up it will be. I think G4 are filming/off radar now, and Earth is in that het noona thing? Plus they gotta sort out the IP for MIx-Up and Ossen. So it won't be one of the announced adaptations. They'll hold My Golden Blood for the high season, so I think it'll be one of the lesser known lead-outs. Wandee or Only Boo maybe? But they only just started filming those. Are we getting our long awaited GL? Anything else left from 2023 that I forgot about?

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Two crawling kisses from Thailand this week. Now this is a fetish I didn't know I had. Turns out, we love this one! (*waves hand in air* I speak for all of us now.)

Cooking Crush

City of Stars

Possibly the best tsundere to cinnamon roll pivot we've had in a long time.

Also the best asshole to KING pivot. Could we have a whole drama staring this character now? Please?

And finally our sunshine learning to love himself.

SIGH. what a lovely show.

And a good SMILEY kiss from a KBL.

And then some cute cuddles? Korea is spoiling me these days. I'm catching expectations now. What's next? Japan learns to kiss in their light BLs? Ha! I kill me.

(All Love for Love's Sake).

(Last week)

[mdhwrites]

Recently, I've been poring over the 'TOH critical' tags and, as someone who wanted to properly watch the show, seeing just how many flaws the writing and characters have kinda turned me off from even starting for a bit. Before I found these tags, I would have assumed Owl House was some kind of flawless untouchable masterpiece. Now, I can see that it is immensely flawed. Not bad, but flawed. It has great ideas that it just spaffs up the walls. In some cases that I've seen, it goes against its own message, which brings me to the point of this.

The show seems to have a message of 'be a weirdo! Be who you want to be and don't let anyone tell you to be something you're not'. This 'be yourself' message is fine in a vacuum, but then there's a character who's treatment in the show goes against this. Hooty! From the moment he's introduced, Hooty is presented as a weird creature. Even other people in the Demon Realm find him unnatural. He's kinda in his own world, and he says and does things that are weird. This would work well for the message, but the problem arises from other characters' treatment of him.

Everyone fucking HATES Hooty! They loathe him! They call him names, they hit him, they put him down constantly, the works! Everyone holds him in open contempt! I wouldn't really have an issue with this at first, but Luz also takes part in some of these actions. It would be one thing for negative/antagonistic characters to be doing this, but the self-proclaimed 'weirdo' main characters? She seems annoyed by Hooty's very existence. Don't get me wrong, he IS annoying, but he's also just being himself. He's a proud weirdo and doesn't let anyone stop him from being who he wants.

Why doesn't Luz love him?

He is exactly the type of person(?) who she should feel connected with. And the fact she joins in on some of the bullying is real shitty. Keep in mind Luz was ridiculed and ostracised for being weird, so her then turning around and being all dismissive and annoyed by someone who is, for all intents and purposes, just like her is shitty.

Personally, I would have had it that Luz really likes Hooty. She admires how he's so unapologetic in his weirdness. You could even still have Eda hitting him and calling him names, which Luz calls out. She knows what it's like to be put down for just being yourself, and she's not gonna stand to see someone else get the same treatment.

Or, another idea, Luz starts out sharing Eda's view on Hooty and being annoyed by him. One time, he does something or shows Luz something he's proud of. She calls him or it or both stupid, and Hooty just....cries. I don't mean overblown waterfalls-out-the-eyes crying, I mean he turns his head down and looks visibly upset.

Luz sees that her words have genuinely hurt Hooty. This could be her realising that Hooty isn't just some weird talking punching bag to hurl abuse at. For his weird actions and appearance, he's a person too. Her being mean to him just for being himself, she realises, makes her no better than her bullies.

Then, to make this even more shitty, the characters DO start being nicer to him later on, but only after he's proven himself useful. So that's a good message, isn't it? 'Love is conditional!' It really makes the 'found family' aspect of the Owl House residents feel all the more forced.

Tl;Dr It's okay to be a weirdo, unless you're Hooty!

(But that's just me! I hope all of this made sense and you can decipher what I'm trying to say😊)

So the short answer to this is that Hooty is essentially character/thematic assassination on... Everyone? Because the show wants to say "Be who you are! Have freedom! Express yourself!" Hooty however is constantly mocked, belittled and literally hurt by others with at best an apology. People treat his portable form as gross despite that letting him experience more of life and the one time people begrudgingly acknowledge he is truly good, they then force him to promise to not repeat the helpful behavior. He is not allowed freedom, expression or to be himself without ridicule, EVEN BY LUZ.

This... However has a bigger problem. Hooty is a bit character after all. If you want to claim he doesn't matter because he's just a joke... There's okay precedent for it. The problem is that then you have to ask what he's mocking. After all, gag characters are all about mocking a certain archtype or the like. King's whole point is to mock children who think themselves as self important and point out how deluded and funny that is, or how funny a deluded sense of self grandeur in general is, at least in the first season. As such... What is Hooty?

Hooty is Sheldon. Not literally but spiritually and this is gonna get kind of rough but here me out. For those who don't get the reference, Sheldon is the main autistic representation in The Big Bang Theory. He is also the most antagonistic force within the friend group. Not because he's evil or anything but because he his own certain ways of doing things and ways he looks at things and as such actually has a lot of episodes about expanding his perception of the world and of others learning to understand who he is and why he is the way he is. The show is actually shockingly respectful in this way, at least most of what I have seen of it, and I can portray this with the best joke I can recall from the series. It also will help me later in why The Big Bang Theory is better than TOH at one certain element people REALLY want to say TOH is great about.

The setup is that the other three main dudes are at a white board, discussing plans to go so see a movie. Every plan they devise runs into a road block because of allergies, time, etc. like that, not even only just because of Sheldon's quirks. However, then the lead, the Ross of the group, stops and goes, "I see it." The others squint and look closer before he adds, "It's the only way." The other two agree... And then they all just leave without Sheldon coming with. Sheldon pauses, looks at the board and goes, "They're correct. It was the only way."

I LOVE this joke... Because it's not mean AT ALL. One might think if they're overly sensitive that it is. I mean, how could they leave their friend behind!? But Sheldon is very honest and up front about his quirks and habits. These guys know him well enough that they know better than to force him out of his comfort zone. That he doesn't function that way. Sheldon KNOWS THIS TOO. As such, when presented with the options of telling Sheldon they can't go because they can't go without him or still having a good night and not making their friend feel bad for being why they couldn't go out, they choose to go out and Sheldon agrees that it was the correct option. They respected him while still living their lives.

And this is because The Big Bang Theory's pitch is not to be offensive to nerds like many online people like to make it out to be (I fucking hate people who call it 'Nerd Black Face') but to just make fun of us like any sitcom would. Sitcoms are parodies of real life. They always exaggerated characters we know are somewhat true. We know a Kramer, we know a Ross, we know a Barney, we know a Lorraine. Are they exactly like this? No, it's cranked up so that it's a comedy, that's the fucking point. But this comedic framing also allows it to be honest about ALL sides of nerd dom.

Sheldon is BY FAR made out to be the most successful, intelligent and wealthiest of ALL the guys. Also, all the guys are doing well in their fields and monetarily. Do they have widespread fame and acclaim? Not really but they're not discredited or anything, they just have interdepartmental bickering. That's accurate from literally every scientist I have seen talk about the subject. It's genuine about the good and the bad of the nerd experience while being entertaining.

So what the fuck does any of this have to do with The Owl House? And especially Hooty? It's actually quite simple. While TOH champions having a nerd protagonist, it presents the 'gentrified nerd'. The convenient nerd. They know about fanfiction but won't force you to actually hear about it. They have interests but not hyperfixations. They don't ever get lost down a rabbit hole because they're passionate about something or just want to tell you a neat fact.

Do you know who does though? Hooty. Hooty just wants someone who is willing to listen about his day. He has some weird quirks to how he behaves and he likes some strange things like bugs. He will talk to you for hours on a subject, randomly and just because he can and might forget that you might have other things to do. To me, those are very, VERY accurate parts of nerd life... And we're supposed to fucking HATE Hooty for these things. Remember the only person, in the ENTIRE SERIES to actually befriend Hooty instead of treating him at best as a convenience is Liltih... At the start of her becoming a joke. The only person who shows him real, genuine compassion... Also becomes 'The Cool Aunt' who hyper fixates on niche architecture and has her trauma of working the EC mocked as just being really bad at her job.

It is, genuinely, kind of gross to me. I've actually talked about this before that the show is so hyperfocused on a very specific, very small set of people for who it approves of, which is essentially whoever fits into Luz correctly, that anyone who felt excluded by the show is extremely valid. And yes, Luz has a montage at the start of silly, over the top and extreme behavior... That doesn't continue. At all. The one time she subjects someone to an Azura rant is to torture Eda enough to go to the Convention and that's only because they were already on the subject because King was interested. She quotes Azura but quickly and doesn't lose the thread. She might say a cute word like 'Snorses' but not even enough to make a break in the conversation.

She is convenient. Gus is only interested in human stuff when it's convenient. Willow will put aside her interest in plants when it's inconvenient. Amity just stops giving a shit about being an intellectual AT ALL post her getting a crush. Hunter wears a wolf t-shirt and gets into Cosmic Frontier enough to cosplay it for Halloween... But only Halloween. These are people who are extremely socially acceptable in every way.

Which... explains why nerds love them actually. See, I think Big Bang Theory does deserve criticism, it is by no means perfect and I would be VERY interested in hearing what the Jewish community thinks of Howard who is easily the most problematic character in the show but not all of the criticism is genuine. I think a lot of it comes down to the fact that we're used to a side, gag character representing the kind worst parts of us... But we're not used to being the focus. We can laugh at all the broke bitches who show up in Sitcoms or the jock failures who are meatheads, etc. like that... But laugh at ourselves? Why would we do that? Why would we allow that? We're better than what this show depicts, even if we're not.

It is inconvenient to the narrative we wish to tell ourselves that we are still the outcasts. That are we not part of the dominant culture and so it is unfair to mock our interests and lifestyle. But like... Marvel movies have been the biggest blockbusters for well over a decade and no one bats a fucking at that. D&D is quickly becoming a household name due to its ever expanding influence. We are not the outcasts anymore. Being into a weird cartoon is not some shocking thing like it was 12 years ago when Bronies first made people aware that this subculture of nerds existed. Times are changing but we still wish to see ourselves as only the victims, even as more and more our spaces show that they are just as evil, corrupt, manipulative and cruel as any athletic superstar or pretty boy actor's club.

A lot of these nerds want to believe they are Luz. Never wrong, never giving anyone a reason to dislike them, and always just passionate about the things they like, never annoying. And you know who those people would mock? Who those people HAVE mocked?

Hooty. Because he's more real. He's the demon they wish they didn't have to face in the mirror. See you next tale.

======+++++======

I really do want to re-emphasize this: FUCK HOWARD. Big Bang is NOT good for the jewish community and I don't think if I watched it nowadays I would be able to tolerate his depiction AT ALL. Also, Raj is also probably all sorts of rough too. I'm ONLY defending the nerd portrayal part of Big Bang.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[skyler1290]

Right, I'm bored and it's late in the night, so I wrote down some random stuff about each of the neo-ancients. Also, there may be a few hints (and one outright saying) of some of their powers down below.

Dark Choco Cookie

- Remember how I said Dark Choco wanted to hide any and everything reminding him and the people around him about his father? Well, he once dyed his hair (of course, to hide its color since it looked really similar to his father's hair). He dyed it blonde (it was the only color he could find), and Choco absolutely regretted it the moment he looked in a mirror. After a day or two, he removed the hair coloring and vowed to never do such a thing again. Stormbringer teases him about this from time to time.

- Choco doesn't react very well when his father is mentioned. That's something him and Frigid have in common.

- Every sword he's felt after the Strawberry Jam Sword hasn't felt right. He can still fight well, sure, but it's like his full potential can't shine through.

- Him and Kouign-Amann sometimes switch swords, just for funsies.

- "What do you mean I can teleport, now?"

- Unsure. He's unusure. About what, you ask? Everything.

Kouign-Amann Cookie

- She's not a Paladin in this AU, but she's aware of them. Kouign likes them and holds admiration for the Crème Knights, however. Not like they'd ever accept her with her parentage, though.

- The cult is after her, and though she acts brave, deep down, paranoia has become a recurring feeling.

- "My father's a cult leader disintegrating people. Do you think I'm ok?!"

- She's always up for a spar with her fellow neo-ancients. Sword fighting is one thing she's really passionate about, after all, and a certain daughter of Dragonberry Cookie shares such an interest.

- Ambition is good. After all, she literally holds the Light of Ambition. But, it also serves as her fatal flaw.

- Healing was never something Kouign-Amann thought she'd be good at. That was more of Saint Vanilla's thing, right? Her Soul Jam may have changed her mind on that.

Raspberry Cookie

- Loyalty is her fatal flaw. It's the same concept as Kouign-Amann having ambition as her fatal flaw while being the holder of the Light of Ambition.

- Her and Royal Berry aren't close, but she does worry about her older brother. She also isn't close with Jungleberry, though she definitely finds her as a respectful figure. Princess Cookie is the only one she's interacted with regularly. They're ok with eachother, and Raspberry is definitely glad to also have someone who finds her freedom important. She views Princess Cookie more like a younger sister than a niece.

- Despite not being blood related to anyone in House Raspberry, she's usually counted as part of it anyways. This is due to a few things she has done for them which has helped significantly. She is aware of Raspberry Mousse Cookie, and she's definitely still proud like canon (that doesn'r change the fact she'd never say it out loud).

- Unlike Dark Choco, Raspberry cut her hair right before she ran away from the kingdom, leaving the cut off hair on her chamber's bathroom floor.

- Just to add more onto it, there's a lot of things she wouldn't say out loud. Each reason is either due to pride, hurt, or even both. The topic of Dragonberry Cookie falls under the last reason mentioned.

- "I miss the kingdom. Was this what Dark Choco felt?"

Mercurial Knight Cookie

- Mercurial is the most calm and stoic out of all of the neo-ancients.

- The other neo-ancients are still unaware of Mercurial Knight's original flavor. The cookie himself is still working that out. Does he want to stay with the identity he has now? Or did that imply that he was loyal to Midnight Lily's cause?

- He misses Elder Faerie, deep down. He had been something that filled the void Midnight Lily had left. But now he's gone, and he accepts that. He holds the Light of Detachment, after all.

- Though, he feels guilty. Mercurial Knight Cookie knows what he's doing is right, but that doesn't lessen the fact he may have grown some sentimental attachments. He misses the Faerie Kingdom. He misses his mother. But he doesn't show it. It's all in the past now, and it's time to move on. Surely time will heal everything.

- "My flavor, you ask? My apologies. I'd rather not say."

- He finds the Light of Detachment's voice as something that brings him up and reminds him of his one true goal: to save Earthbread from the former ancients and protect his fellow neo-ancients while at it. This was an oath he took silently. Unlike the last one, he would not break it.

Stormbringer Cookie

- If you want to know her personality, I'll first have to ask you a question. Do you know what 'EPIC: The Musical' is? If you do, she's almost exactly like Hermes.

- Stormbringer is a demigoddess, but she acts as if she was a full goddess most of the time and refers to herself as the latter. One day, she hopes to ascend to true godhood in a good way unlike her mother.

- Her Soul Jam provided her with less powers than the others since Stormbringer already had quite a few to begin with. The witches wouldn't want someone else becoming too overpowered now, would they?

- "What do you want me to do? Scare them off by sounding some thunder?"

- Connecting to the info above, Stormbringer possesses the ability to sound thunder (but that doesn't mean lightning will strike).

- She often brags how her weapon is the coolest out of all of the equipment the neo-ancients have. They all can't help but agree when it comes to that.

-

Sorry for any typos. I'm tired so I'm not going to be rereading this post. I could've written this tomorrow, but I love the BAAU so much, I couldn't help myself.

Beast Ancients AU by @cuppajj

[sarahjtv]

My Hero Academia Chapter 430 Spoiler Talk: The True End of An Era (Part 1)

This is it, the final chapter of My Hero Academia. A series 10 years in the making has finally ended. It's really insane to think about. This series has done so much good for a lot of people despite the fandom's flaws. MHA was both people's introduction and even reintroduction to manga and anime. It's bittersweet to write about the final chapter, but I will do the best I can to honor the series I love. This is going to be a very long one. Also a lot of screaming.

Now, please, if you want to wait until the official translation releases on Sunday, PLEASE TURN AWAY NOW! Save this post and come back to it on Sunday when everyone has read the chapter. I will be using spoiler hashtags for this, so if you end up spoiling yourself because of my post, that's on you. THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING:

Here we go. We first start off with our Final Color page for the series! It's a gorgeous double-page spread featuring all Class 1-A (Now 2-A) kids that we've grown to know and love throughout the past 10 years including Shinso, Aizawa, and All Might of course. Izuku Midoriya AKA Deku, our beautiful MC who I will miss with all my heart and soul 💚, is leading the page and his friends towards the bright future they all fought so hard for. It's a wonderful way to conclude the series and I will make sure to get a high-quality version of it to use as my computer wallpaper.

The final chapter is titled "My Hero Academia" because of course it is 🥹. This was truly My Hero Academia.

OH FUCK WE GET A TIME SKIP TO THE FUTURE SOMEONE HOLD ME 😭

KOTA IS THE THE UA HERO COURSE AND IZUKU IS HIS TEACHER IT'S SO PERFECT FOR HIM!!!💚😭 I BET MR. AIZAWA AND ALL MIGHT WERE BIG INSPIRATIONS FOR HIM TO TAKE THIS PATH 🥹

IT'S ONLY BEEN 1 PAGE AND THIS CHAPTER HAS ALREADY ENDED ME IT'S SO JOEVER FUCK

BTW, Deku is saying a more optimistic version of the "Not all men are born equal" narration he told us at the beginning of the very first chapter of the series. Very nice way of bringing the story full circle.

Ok, the next 2 pages have a lot of things in them, so I'm going to try to sum it up as best as I can:

Izuku finally came home to see his mother, Inko, at their apartment and she looks happy 💚

All Might is out of his wheelchair and helping old Gran Tarino walk with a cane (how he still survived I have no idea).

All the kids running in their gym clothes in what looks like their second Sports Festival (god, what I'd give to see that in its entirety).

Miriko is very happy with her new prosthetics including one that looks like the Bullet Bill from the Super Mario series.

The kids struggling taking either mid-terms or finals written tests. Bakugo is still using his left arm to write, so I assume his right arm is still barely usable.

Shoji and Kota shaking some prominent mutant's hand I assume from their contributions towards the war.

Mt. Lady and Kamui Woods working together as usual!

Tokoyama meeting up with Hawks.

KOTA AND ERI HOLDING HANDS AND GETTING READY FOR SCHOOL WITH MADALAY'S APPROVAL THAT'S SO FUCKING CUTE 😭❤️🤍

Endeavor being followed around by his sidekicks and Hawks.

Aizawa and Present Mic visiting what I bet is Shirakumo's grave 😢

The fan translator says that the kids finally meet Melissa from the first MHA movie! We don't see her face, but I'll take what they say is truth.

Spinner's book selling and Compress reading it in jail.

Bakugo going through rehab to get his right arm back!

Deku and Ochako spending time in the snow.

OUR KID'S GRADUATION OH MY GOD MOST OF THEM ARE 18 THERE AND THEY'RE OFFICIALLY PRO HEROES I'M SO FUCKING PROUD OF THEM 😭❤️ Interesting though since none of them really look much older except for maybe Iida and Shoto, but it's hard to tell from the scans. And Bakugo and Monoma keep the crazy graduation tradition of blowing things up as their goodbye present to UA!

And finally, we see the embers of One For All slowly fade away in Izuku's hand until there's nothing left...

Oh, god. The time skip takes place 8 YEARS in the future geez. So, if this is 8 years since we left the kids in Class 2-A, they would be about 24-25 years old now damn. We're actually going to see them all grown up that's crazy.

The next page shows us a middle school class very similar to how we saw Deku and Bakugo at the very beginning of the series. The teacher asks them what they want to do in the future and we get to see small glimpses of other characters now such as Hatsume who has her own lab (go, girl!), and LaBrava who seems to own a company with Gentle!

The main kid we focus on in this class is Dai, the young boy with dark blue-ish dotted hair who was looking at the All Might statue in Kamino before the first war started (I don't blame you for forgetting; I had to look him up too). He says he wants to be a hero, but everyone else says that his Quirk is too weak for him to become one. Despite that, he still goes to the All Might statue (which sounds like has been rebuilt) for inspiration. Sound familiar? 🤔

Next we see Shoji accepting a prestigious award for his efforts in resolving mutant prejudice-based incidents! He looks SO BULKY HOLY SHIT DUDE 😳 And his hair got longer to the point of putting it in a ponytail! Also, Koda and the glue Class 1-B kid (I think his name is Bondo or something) are there to congratulate him too! I bet you that Shoji making it to the top 10 in the final popularity poll helped Horikoshi give him a little spotlight and it's a good way of following up on what happened after his bout in the Final War.

Next up, we see Ochako, Tsuyu, Momo, and Iida visiting schools across the country! Ochako has also set up a Quirk Counseling expansion project that's become one of the most essential things in the future society!

Ok:

1: It's hard to tell with Iida, but the girls all look slightly older especially with their hair being a little longer.

2: Their future costumes look great! It's not a 100% match to what we saw in Endeavor's vision, but it's still great! Iida's armor got more detail to them; Tsuyu's frog goggles got gogglier?; Momo is finally coving up her cleavage and showing less exposed skin took you 10 years, but you finally got there, Horikoshi; and Ochako's got updated headwear, the two dots on her outfit are side-by-side instead of on top of each other, and her collar thing looks similar to Deku's hero mask which I know was intentional.

3: Good for Ochako for doing something about Quirk Counseling. Definitely inspired by what happened with Himiko Toga. I hope this means that we won't have another incident like Toga had and that kids are now able to get help with their Quirks as opposed to being villainized. I hope Ochako's making good money out of this too for her family like she originally intended.

We also see a teenage Eri going to her music club with a guitar on her back! She has a normal girl's sailor uniform, so my best guess is that she's either still in middle school (I think she would be 14-15 at this point) or she's not in UA like a lot of us thought. Either way, she wants to pursue music instead of Hero work so I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't go to UA at all. It also looks like her horn did fully grow back, but whether her Rewind Quirk still works the same is up in the air.

And we see that Mr. Aizawa is still working at UA, BUT HE CUT HIS HAIR SHORT 😭 WHY DID YOU CUT HIS BEAUTIFUL, LONG LOCKS, HORIKOSHI??? OF ALL THE PHYSICAL CHANGES YOU GIVE OUR CHARACTERS THIS IS THE MOST DEVASTATING 😭

*BREATHS* But, he shows Deku and us a video of Bakugo SCREAMING AT A CIVILIAN FOR FILMING HIM TOO CLOSELY 😂😭 PLEASE NEVER CHANGE, KATSUKI BAKUGO 🧡 I'm also really glad he still got to be a Pro Hero despite his injuries.

AND NOW WE SEE MY SWEET FAVORITE BOY, SHOTO TODOROKI WHO CUT HIS HAIR A LITTLE SHORTER!!! I DON'T CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS, I LIKE HIM BETTER WITH SHORT HAIR AND STILL LOOKS LIKE THE BEAUTIFUL PRETTY BOY HE ALWAYS WAS! STAY PRETTY, SHOTO!!! 🩵

Anyway, Shoto patrols day and night and is very nice to his fans! Kind king 👑! He's also become his own man to the public now as he's barley called "Endeavor's Son" anymore. That's a real relief because I know for a fact that that was haunting him for years. Also, there's a chance he'll pass Mt. Lady, Kamui Woods, and even Mirio in the rankings! I'm so proud of my fave! 🩵❄️🔥

GAH! I'm actually hitting a world limit here! I have to make a Part 2!

[fincalinde]

I see you have done some really thoughtful metas. What're your thoughts on Nie Mingjue? IMO he's a lot more complicated than he's usually assumed to be...

One of my classic absurdly late ask responses! Glad you enjoy the meta.

I think NMJ occupies a fascinating place in the narrative, because his ultimate fate is inevitable despite the fact that he theoretically has more agency than most (all?) of the rest of the main cast.

For a start he becomes clan leader at a young age, and while that comes with its pressures it's undeniably an influential position. He's the leading general of the Sunshot Campaign. Then, after the Sunshot Campaign, the Nie and the Jin are by some margin the most powerful clans. So, in a political sense NMJ has immense power. In theory he has the ability to make far better choices. He could stop persecuting JGY, who literally has no choice but to follow his father's orders, and he could choose to focus his ire where it belongs: on JGS. And he could also choose to counter JGS in ways that don't push the jianghu back to the brink of another devastating war.

Except he can't make those choices. And I want to make a strong distinction here: he is not like other characters such as JGY or LXC or JC, whose choices are limited by their clear understanding of their own limitations and the political landscape (including but not limited to the fact that a post-Sunshot descent into war between the Nie and the Jin would be catastrophic). No. NMJ's choices are limited because by the end of the Sunshot Campaign his mental capacity is irreversibly compromised.

Not only is NMJ terminally ill, but we're given clear examples of contrast between NMJ early in Sunshot and NMJ late- and post-Sunshot. Pre-Sunshot NMJ understands the Wen have political and cultivation power that utterly outclasses him and his clan, so he stands by and tolerates their existence. He knows it would be suicide to go up against them, and it's only when the Wen cross a line and all the clans unite that he's able to actually do anything about the fact that WRH murdered his father.

Contrast that to NMJ by the end of Sunshot, so irrationally obsessed with JGY that he's willing to jeopardise the hard-won (and fragile) stability of the jianghu by trying to kill him. Reminder: when NMJ kicks JGY down the stairs, he starts to follow him down with the express intent of killing him. As in, he fully intends to murder the legitimate son of his main political rival and an immensely powerful clan leader on the steps of his own home. That is ludicrous. Pre-Sunshot NMJ wouldn't have done something like that for his own beloved father, let alone for a grudge.

All of NMJ's flaws are obvious from the earliest point of his timeline: he's proud, he's inflexible, he's righteous but he's hypocritical. But early on we see examples of NMJ bending a little, of recognising nuance and showing, in his own inelegant way, his compassionate side. By the end, that's gone. The fan-burning incident alone (the fantrum!) demonstrates it. That's the way he treats his beloved didi, never mind how he treats his san-di.

Of course the narrative claims JGY can always talk NMJ round, but it's simply not true. In the end, the only way JGY can preserve himself is by making NMJ a promise he can't keep (to deliver XY's head) in order to buy himself enough time for NMJ to die and no longer be an immediate mortal threat. If JGY had not accelerated NMJ's decline, NMJ would have killed him and plunged the jianghu into another needless conflict.

I've spilled ink on the staircase scene already so I'm holding back on digging into this in more detail, but the fact is any discussion of NMJ's downfall is inextricably tangled up with JGY. The focal point of NMJ's descent is his obsession with JGY in particular, and it's important to remember what's relevant is not so much what JGY has or hasn't done but how NMJ treats him.

I do think one of the best ways to put it in context is to compare the way NMJ reacts to WRH to the way he reacts to JGY. WRH literally kills NMJ's father but NMJ has a cool enough head to know he has to bide his time. JGY on the other hand absolutely does betray NMJ's trust, in a situation where, again, if he does as NMJ wants (turns himself in) he's going to end up dead. And from that moment on, NMJ has no intention of giving JGY the benefit of the doubt. Yes, after LXC intervenes (remember, JGY would be dead without that intervention!) NMJ backs off and ends up agreeing to the sworn brotherhood, but he enters into the brotherhood in entirely the wrong spirit, seeing it as a way to monitor and subjugate JGY, who is already answerable to his father over and above any obligations to an elder brother.

Would NMJ at fifteen years old have listened to LXC and JGY's explanations in Qishan or later on the stairs at Golden Carp Tower? Possibly. But we don't have any examples of a time when he truly listened to JGY, and he was always going to end up this way regardless, taken out by a qi deviation and turned into the stuff of nightmares. JGY accelerated an existing process to save his own skin, but he didn't invent it out of whole cloth. So the tragedy of NMJ is not what JGY did to him. It goes back further than that, to when his ancestors first started cultivating the resentful energy of beasts.

Even then, contrasting NMJ to another character is illuminating. The text tells us NHS is in a bind: if he cultivates with his sabre, he's dooming himself. But if he doesn't cultivate with his sabre, he's pissing off his ancestors. The instinct then is perhaps to think—poor NMJ! He's in the same bind!

But NMJ never has a moment's doubt about sabre cultivation. NMJ knows the price and he pays it without question. NMJ doesn't agonise about how to balance his duty to his clan and his ancestors against his desire to not go violently insane. He accepts it as a fact of life and never thinks to question it or push back against it. He marches down the path that extirpates all his good qualities and leads straight to his worst self, and never so much as glances around in the hope of sighting a different way.

Again we're getting to that tension I find most interesting about NMJ: agency rubbing shoulders with inevitability. NHS finds a way to lead his clan and Word of God become Xiandu without cultivating with his sabre. Does that mean NMJ is responsible for his choices and he can't be absolved of his actions by blaming his inheritance? I don't necessarily have an answer for that, but I hugely enjoy exploring the question.

[lunar-rcp]

𖦹 🌵 ୨ ˓ . . Sandvile rescue team headcanons ! 𝅄˚

𓏲 request by @randomartkid-12

─ thank your for the request! i wish they got more screentime in the show.

୨ . ࣪ Sandy﹚💗 !

★ She's a cursing sailor. She curses a LOT. She's probably the one who curses the most out of all rcts

★ Kind of competitive. She hates it when she loses, or even worse; gets called a sore loser. (To which Droney sometimes calls her that to tease her. She doesn't like it)

★ Despite all her flaws, she's very fond with kids and is great with them. She could be a proud mother of her own some day if she was able to! But for now, she has Droney.

★ Like Amber, she was extremely overjoyed to find an another female rescue member. So much so, she teased Droney and Keaton a little when she met her, the conversation went like this:

"Oh my god, a girl in a rescue team! I just can't believe it!" Amber squealed with delight.

"I know right!" Sandy lightly chuckled to herself. "I'm telling ya, I was getting real tired of these idiotic boys in my team."

"What?!" Droney and Keaton exclaimed in unison, distraught.

୨ . ࣪ Keaton﹚💚 !

★ Keaton's like an overly protecting doting father to Droney. He worries about him a lot, as Droney can be really hyper and get into accidents.

★ Literally a walking teddy bear. He's too sweet for his own good.

★ He's a little sensitive. He's the one who's more prone to getting emotional and quicky think. He really doesn't like this about himself as he sees himself as 'the strong guy', but his members say that its okay to be sensitive.

★ Has a frenemy relationship with Roy. Buddies who always rival with each other who's the strongest.

୨ . ࣪ Droney﹚💛 !

★ Best friends with Helly! He's really happy to find someone his age in the rescue team. Always goes on chaotic adventures with him!

★ He found carry a little scary due to his huge size. But Mark & Bucky assured him that Carry's a really sweet guy, so now they're a little closer.

★ Sees Roy as a big brother, loves to hang out with him as they wander around town.

★ He doesn't have the best attention span, but he's trying his best.

𖦹 🌵 ୨ ˓ . . Sandvile rescue team

★ Is more on the newer side. They have formed a few months after the mountain rescue team. They're still learning, but however they have the most advanced tech.

★ They love to go on sandboarding competitions. (Spoiler alert, Sandy always wins.)

[pjsk-writin]

HEELOOO AMIA!!

I should probably calm down-

So I wanna request Toya, Akito, Tsukasa and Rui with a reader who has face dysmorphia?

HIIII ITS OK we are not calm here/lh but ofc !! hope u like this !! <3

♡ FACE DYSMORPHIA - Akito Shinonome, Toya Aoyagi, Tsukasa Tenma and Rui Kamishiro x Reader

Akito:

While not dysmorphia, Akito has had his fair share of seeing himself in ways that were completely warped, hating parts of himself that weren't even true

He's still working on not feeling insecure, but in the meantime, he's putting his all into helping you

His compliments come out a bit passive aggressive, but he's really trying his best to drive it in how beautiful you were despite what your dysmorphia tells you

Sometimes, he'll grab your face gently in his hands, directing your gaze to the mirror and consistently complimenting you over and over until you agree with his words <3

"You're the most gorgeous person in the world, and I'm not gonna stop saying it."

Toya:

Toya has had struggles with feeling good enough, but he's never really experienced anything like dysmorphia, unless you count him feeling like he wasn't good enough

He's worked hard to be proud of the person he is today, and he's more than set to help you become proud of yourself too

His compliments will ways be subtle, but you can tell he means every word when he looks so intently into your eyes, trying to convince you of what he sees

He likes to simply gaze at your face, occasionally brushing his fingertips against your every supposed "flaw" and giving you that smile you always loved <3

"You're beautiful, okay? Never forget that."

Tsukasa:

Tsukasa may not struggle with dysmorphia, but he has had moments from time to time where he was incredibly uncertain about himself

Whenever he's struggled with himself though, he finds surrounding himself with the people he loves, or hyping himself up

He will absolutely hype you up at every opportunity he can, presenting you as his gorgeous partner and will not back down when you tell him no

He takes a liking to kissing your cheeks over and over again, almost like a constant reminder to you of how absolutely stunning you were to him <3

"My beautiful co-star, how lovely you shine!"

Rui:

While Rui might not have dysmorphia of any kind, he understands what it's like to hate or be very unclear with one part of yourself.

While he's still learning to grow comfortable in his own skin, he makes it his mission to help you in your journey

He consistently compliments your face every day, pointing out a feature that you might not notice or don't like and calling it beautiful

Will absolutely cover your face in kisses, he doesn't care if you feel like your face is disgusting or gross, you're the most beautiful person in the world to him <3

"Hey dearest, did I tell you how pretty your eyes look?"

[squishmalloe]

okay i've been wanting to do a character analysis on tallulah for a bit, and bad's stream today (july 10th) has really inspired me sooo big paragraphs under the cut

(NOTE: remember that this is all roleplay, and i'm not talking about the ccs here, only their characters)

so, starting with tallulah's relationship with wilbur. at the start, wilbur found tallulah in the attic after she survived off of dirt for... however long she was up there. wilbur was resistant to the idea of parenthood at first, but tallulah persisted with questions like "are you my dad now?" and asking him to name her, among other things. whether she was aware of the way she affected him or not, she definitely pulled at wilbur's heartstrings. he made sure to explain to her multiple times that he wouldn't be around too much, but tallulah was so desperate for a father and love that she accepted him regardless of his flaws.

(speaking of the attic, the way tallulah's admin(s) incorporate her trauma from the attic, water/beaches, etc. is SO brilliant)

tallulah desperately wants wilbur to love her, and she loves him a lot. she said one time that she wasn't afraid of death itself, only the idea that wil would be sad after her death. she clearly doesn't have great self-preservation skills (which this is kinda worrying what with her being... not the best at combat related activities), and this is especially evident with her interactions with quackity, since he constantly has hurt her (the mean names at the beginning, him vandalising her house with gegg and the masked man, and possibly other things i've forgotten). she believes quackity will make wilbur happy, and she wants nothing more than to make him happy.

its also worth noting that wilbur gave her praise whenever she was kind to people (but in this case specifically quackity). this could also contribute to her desire to bond with quackity, because she thinks that being kind to quackity will make wilbur proud (and because she's just a sweet and intelligent person (egg?) in general, who's probably also recognized quackity's difficulties). she wants wilbur to be proud of her, and she's willing to risk her own safety to achieve that.

though, there is an exception to this rule; gegg. since meeting gegg, tallulah has been jealous, cold, and suspicious towards gegg, though there wasn't a very good (apparent) reason for this, at least at first. then, she reveals to wilbur that she's afraid that gegg will replace her, explaining her behaviour. she dislikes gegg but not quackity because quackity can't replace her; he's not an egg or a child, he's a human(?) adult. he wouldn't be a son to wilbur, he'd be a partner. gegg, on the other hand, would be a son.

so, gegg has the ability to replace tallulah, but why would she be afraid of that? she wasn't jealous of any of the other eggs when wilbur met them. the reason for her fear/jealousy is because gegg was an orphan and didn't have parents, despite wilbur expressing obvious distaste for him (guggets, anyone?). she wasn't jealous of ramón when wilbur and tallulah met him, but that was because ramón has fit. gegg has no one, and that made tallulah scared that she'd be replaced as wilbur's one and only child.

tallulah constantly expresses fear and sadness to phil about wilbur being away, and twice (to my knowledge) she's talked to bad about how she misses him. today (july 10th), she talked to bad about how she views bad and phil as her dads/father figures alongside wilbur. clearly she cares SO much about her family outside of wilbur, and the fact that she was so adamant that she doesn't replace him (even if she's not actually replacing him) when bad talked to her about how she has other family that love her too ties into the idea that she's terrified of being replaced (even though she loves her other family a lot), so in turn, she doesn't want to do that to wilbur. she loves wilbur so much, so much so that she puts aside her own wellbeing and feelings to think about his instead.

tallulah's character is loving, sweet, persistent, naïve, stubborn, and a bit clingy. she wants to be loved, she wants wilbur to be proud of her, and most of all, she wants wilbur to be happy. she's willing to put everything she loves aside just for him to feel happy, even at the cost of her own. she's extremely trusting, she's vulnerable, and she's emotionally connected to her family and those around her; even with gegg she was never too mean to him, despite her fears.

im excited to see where her admin(s) take her character next!

[novel-nook-blog]

Project A.N. – Meet Lysandra 🌝

I figured that as I introduced my project to you, I may introduce my MCs as well 😊.

Let's start with my protagonist. Lysandra.

Okay, so this is her - the queen herself, haha, not yet, but we love her. And by "we" I mean myself 😆. My friend, who knows too much about my book and its characters, doesn't like Lys so much… but that's not the reason for this post. Let me introduce her to you so you can figure out if you like her or not.

Lys is a freshly 18 yo angel of life. She survived the transformation, possibly thanks to Damian, but let's not dive into too many details. She has blond curlish hair, as you can see from my artbreeder picture (I created all of my characters there and I'm very proud of that, haha). It's not surprising that she has blond hair, nor are her eyes unexpected. It's a trait of her clan. This is what makes each clan different – their visual appearance and the colour of their wings. In Lys's case, her wings are white.

She's quite extroverted and very outgoing, but also incredibly protective of her loved ones. Her biggest flaw is her stubbornness, but thankfully Damian is very patient, even with her. She has a tendency to get angry very easily and has some risky ideas, which can be a bit concerning. If you'd lock us up in a room together, we might either end up becoming best friends or driving each other crazy. I'm still not sure. I do care about her a lot, but I'm not certain if we would actually get along in real life. Maybe it's because she has some of the same bad habits and quirks that I don't like about myself… But I really don't want you to think poorly of her. She has so many wonderful qualities. She's really trustworthy, has her own special sense of humor, and stays optimistic despite everything she's been through.

There is a lot that I'd like to say but most of it would be a spoiler. Not that you'll ever read it. Who knows if it'll ever get published? The thing I can, however, tell you is, that she has terrible nightmares. They seem so real to her that she loses control of realising what part is from the real world and what is just a dream. It's truly horrid and it messes her up. But besides that she's fine.

That is the basic picture of Lysandra. Next post will be about my male MC – Damian, so see you there😊.

[saintsenara]

you're like the only person i've seen on here from northern ireland who actually loves northern ireland - what do you think makes it so great? (really sorry if this seems rude, i'm just interested in how the opinions can be so wildly different)

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

my online presence as a northern ireland stan account is mainly caused by holding the following opinion:

it is an unfortunate truth that the moment you are clocked in most other places in the anglophone world as being northern irish [usually after having been compelled to say the word "how"], people like to offer you their views on the place.

these views aren't always negative, but they always - especially if they come from people who consider themselves part of the irish diaspora [and my st patrick's day sermon to you all is "irish-americans, learn to stay in your lane"] - relate to a northern ireland which doesn't actually exist. people might cast us as uncivilised fools living in a 1970s time-capsule of unrelenting violence, they might cast us as a great bunch of lads bouncing around feeling the derry girls fantasy, but they never care very much about the actual experience of living here in 2024.

and - indeed - the experience of choosing to live here. i like ni because i was born here, and so all of the formative experiences of my early life took place while drinking a tin in some field or other, but it's also somewhere i have returned to, after having gone to university and begun my medical training in england.

and this is an aspect of irish life which doesn't have a huge presence in the way we think and talk about irishness. so much irish history is bound up in migration - in leaving the motherland and longing for it from afar - and in the diaspora experience that we rarely think about the fact that people have always and will always come to ireland. people - whether returning here or coming to study or coming to live forever or coming to live until they too can return home - choose every day to put down roots in northern ireland, despite all its faults and its flaws.

and it bothers me that this is constantly forgotten in all the giving out we all do about the place.

because - yes - this is a country which is fucked up in a huge number of ways. our politics is corrupt and nonsensical even when up against the bin fire which is the rest of the united kingdom. our people are beset by poverty and deprivation [and i will of course acknowledge that i am someone who lives here with a well-paid, stable job]. our sectarian wound is still bleeding, heavily. we have not seen justice for the atrocities perpetuated against us by the british state during the troubles, nor for the atrocities we perpetuated against our own at the same time. we have not learned from our own experiences of discrimination when it comes to discriminating against people who live here who are not white, who are not christian, or who are immigrants. it rains for a good three quarters of the year.

but as i grow older, i find i have less and less time both for pure and grinding cynicism in the face of this situation and for the conviction that the grass might be greener somewhere else. i think this latter is a particular issue in the irish national character - a sort of "ah well, things are shite and they'd only be better if x happened". in the north, i think we're especially beset by this - "the country can't improve until there's a united ireland" [or, if you're on the other side, "the country can't improve until the fenians stop complaining"].

but we have a lot to be proud of and a lot to be hopeful for as we keep going.

because northern ireland is also a place whose history is about peace as much as it is about war. it's the birthplace of the best member of girls aloud. it's somewhere people have mobilised only recently for pay and working conditions on a par with the rest of the uk, and will keep mobilising until we win. it's introduced the world to the fact that protestants keep toasters in cupboards. it's a place whose own fight for reproductive justice has rather flown under the radar in comparison to that of the republic of ireland, but which is no less active. it's a place where it's perfectly acceptable to be served apple and mars bar sandwiches at a funeral [provided the deceased was presbyterian]. it's a place where you never have to become invested in the nation's performance in international sporting competitions and can get blind drunk as god intended. it's a place with great patter.

it's a place which has perfected street art... in a sense. it's a place where you can get unusual soft drinks delivered to your door by a sinister figure called the minerals man. it's a place which recognises that balaclavas are chic. it's the only place on earth you can buy fifteens and a cowboy supper, whether or not you actually should do the latter. it's a place where you can turn bomb scares to your advantage by using them as an excuse to swerve parties you didn't want to attend. it's a place whose people have not given up their fight for justice, who still grieve and remember the dead and the disappeared. it's a place people travel across the world to make their home and enrich with their presence. it's a place where the quality of life is genuinely improving, and which we can continue to improve if we don't give into the idea that nothing can ever change. it's a cold and rainy little country, filled with nondescript grey housing estates and burned out cars, which also looks like this:

happy st patrick's day.

[thlayli-ra]

Which 5 fics you've written are your favorites or most proud of?

Ooh! Thank you Anon for slipping into my askbox with a lovely little question. Must admit, this was hard! I'm proud of most of my fics so whittling it down to just five was tricky but here goes;

1. Flint and Steel - I feel like this is the best writing I've ever done. I wrote it back when I had bags of time to edit and re-read what I'd written previously so it's a better coherent story. I love the world-building, the imagery, the harsh but beautiful love story. This is probably still my best work to date and I really hope to finish the series one day and do it justice!

2. Would You Offer Your Throat To The Wolf - This one just feels... special to me. It's the most brutal, graphic and depressing fic that I've written and my first foray into pure horror but was very liberating to write. It also felt like something of an event at the time - I'd been building up towards it here on Tumblr so when I finally posted it, it kinda had its own little following. It's also a fic that has prompted so many incredible comments and feedback from readers, many of which said it inspired their own writing and that is just so cool to me!

3. When We're Alone - Of all my fics, this is probably my own little personal favourite (and one of my least popular 😂). It's a silly, little Underpunk fluff piece set in the Valetverse AU. I just loved writing a hopelessly un-domesticated Punk trying (and failing miserably) to nurse Taker back to health while he was injured. I usually write Punk as very intense and moody so having him in more of a comedy role was a lot of fun (although he's still very moody!)

4. The Moon Rises Red Tonight - My other unloved little baby! It's a close second for my personal favourite fic. It's utter self-indulgence - I wanted all four of my faves to fuck! That's it! That's the premise! But, because it's me, and I'm god-awful at writing smut, it somehow turned into a porn with plot fic, focusing in on politics, corruption, and trauma, whilst also being rather light-hearted and wholesome. And filthy too! It's a weird bag! I adore the au, I adore all the flawed characters and their self-discovery throughout and I want to draw and write more for it in the future.

5. The Chain - Sometimes, a moment sticks in your head and magic happens. That Smackdown where Drew carried a bloody Punk to the ramp and dumped his carcass for all of his hometown to see was....... [local dogs start barking]. I had to write something for it! Originally it was going to be another headcanon essay talking about a motif I'd used in several fics of Punk and AJ being connected by a chain with hooks embedded in their chests when it dawned on my to actually write a fic about it, resulting in this twisted soulmate au. To me, it's a perfect little fic, a beautiful gemstone in my collection and I'm very proud of it.

[Honourary Mention - Yes, I'm cheating here but I couldn't not mention my most popular fic The Valets of WWE. Despite it easily being my worst in terms of writing prowess, it's a huge personal achievement for me. It had a massive cast and was heavily influenced by reader requests and input so I had to think on my feet for every chapter and change things up on the fly sometimes. I also had to write for characters I didn't know very well during an era that I admittedly didn't really watch (no, I'd never seen any Legacy or Social Outcasts footage until writing this fic!!!) so that was a bit nerve-wracking. But despite the challenges, I managed to create this huge, intricate soap opera, that had so many interlinking storylines and plot threads, that had characters bouncing off each other constantly and even if it reads more like a script than narrative, I'm still very proud of it and I always look forward to returning to the valetverse for more!]

[cangrellesteponme]

OCTOBER 29TH - PROUD

(read this on AO3 here)

i'm late already but bay one of dadbastian week let's fucking goooooooooo

anyway general warning for this one: i decided to use it/its pronouns for sebastian for a bit. don't ask me why (there is a reason but i'd need to go on a tangent). it's only for the first part, not the whole thing, so do what you will with that information.

enjoy!

The demon — Sebastian, now, it thinks, though it can still only hear the name as if coming from its young master’s mouth, both unfitting and imperious — is having some trouble adjusting.

Of course, it would not dare admit such a thing to anyone — but in the dead of night, with no living souls awake to be able to tell or catch even just a glimpse of it all, it is safe to let go a little. Alone and at rest in the manor’s darkest hour, the demon lets itself slip through the cracks of its persona. If it were human, the feeling would be comparable to the removal of an ill-fitting coat, and the relief one feels taking their first unrestricted breaths.

The night only offers a few hours of freedom and time, relentless and cruel as ever, passes too quickly to be thoroughly enjoyed. All too soon, dawn’s first lights, intruders that they are, make their way into the manor, and with them come the duty of being Sebastian again. 

Being, becoming this feels entirely wrong still, yet just slightly off. It might be the name — and the thought of sharing it with a dog — or it might be the master, this child whose pieces, bent and askew, won’t fit together anymore — much less under his own borrowed name. It might, in fact, be this new identity altogether, the way Sebastian Michaelis, the Phantomhive butler, somehow clings to the skin but never quite catches on. Stepping into a new role usually comes easy, but this one is odd.

It, Sebastian, he somehow knows that he has chosen a state of self worthy of and adapted to his young master: competent and obedient enough for the prestige the boy wants, yet cocky and contrarian to a fault, difficult and infuriating — something meant to stoke the fire of the boy’s arrogance, to make his noble penchant for entitlement grow fangs of disdain, to pull the worst, most delectable, flaws out of this ridiculously short asthmatic annoyance of a young master. Something ideal, really.

Yet here it is, unable to ever fully become one with himself. It is as if something were missing — but what exactly?

The answer is, like most things, quite simple.

Another hard day culminates into a particularly infuriating point.

Lady Elizabeth — bless her soul, Sebastian tells himself with irony dripping from the very thought — comes to visit, and her presence alone is a stronger ill omen than every curse upon the Phantomhive name.

With her come a plethora of issues. The young master stumbles through every interaction with the grace of a blindfolded elephant on a tightrope, the entire place has to be redecorated with garish bows and all sorts of unspeakably pink things, and — the worst part of it all — Sebastian and the earl must pretend he is indeed the Ciel she thinks he is, while the name of the twin who actually stands before her never leaves her lips.

She truly is quite the sweet child, thinking she is sparing her dear friend’s feelings. Infuriating. Sebastian knows the boy agrees — despite his obvious fondness for her — from the way tension seems to spread from the top of his head to the tip of his toes.

And yet, his reaction to Elizabeth and her usual oh, Ciel, won’t yous and Ciel, we shoulds is a far cry from the stiffness with which he greeted her when they were first reunited. Sebastian remembers a boy who barely even responded to what should have been his own name, but what he sees is entirely different: no shying away from her, clear signs of intent listening, and no smile but a somewhat open and attentive expression on his face — somber as usual, yet caring. And he doesn’t flinch at every Ciel anymore.

What an improvement, Sebastian thinks and he finds himself, against all odds, smiling. His master is a quick learner. Perhaps it objectively is not that impressive, but to Sebastian, it feels disproportionately spectacular, and part of him comfortably settles into the feeling of being so foolishly proud of something insignificant.

Quite simple indeed. What should a butler feel for his prodigious young master, if not pride?

The rest of him should pale in comparison to the need and joy to see the boy succeed — although the accomplishment is, well, identity theft, of all things, it should still be acknowledged — and it does indeed. Sebastian almost forgets himself, forgets his role — both demon and butler — and in those moments he is nothing but the one standing by his boy, and isn’t he doing so well? Does anything matter more than this?

No, nothing does, Sebastian finds himself thinking as he watches the child eat his chocolate cake with too much enthusiasm for it to be proper, especially in front of a lady.

[dlamp-dictator]

Okay, finished up the main story of Wuthering Waves and slowly getting a feel for how the day-to-day grind is going to be in this game. And... I gotta' be honest here.

I'm enjoying it. A lot.

The game is fun. Very fun. It's got flaws, glaring flaws, but frankly I haven't had this much fun in a game like this since maybe DmC 5 if I had to compare it to something I'm familiar with. Ultimately, despite my love of the game I like it in spite of its massive flaws rather than because of its minor strong points, but it's a game I honestly think I'll stick with for awhile.

However, I'm not here to talk about the gameplay this time around. I wanted to talk about the story first because that's honestly the roughest part of the game. And I'll be frank, this is more a mad rambling in the sense of the younger Allen X than the current one, but I just can't get my thoughts on this game steady yet, so try not to mind the vomit I'm about to throw at you.

But first, as always, that synopsis.

Wuthering Waves is set in a futuristic post-apocalyptic world after a catastrophe called the Lament wiped out most of humanity and caused unknown beings and monsters, called Tacet Discords to appear. However, humanity soon adapted to the threat and over time rebuilt civilization. The story follows the amnesiac Rover, who has awoken from a deep slumber and sets out to explore this new world.

Let it be known that I stole this from the wiki because that's how little I care to summarize this story myself. There's... a lot to discuss. I'll be here all day if I nitpick and talk about every immediate problem I have with the game's story, so I'll try to summarize my issues with three main points. Emphasis on try, again the game's still very new and my thoughts are overall still very scattered. With that said, here are the main points:

There's no real ground for us to care about the world or its people.

The game overloads us with unfamiliar terms and makes following the story hard.

The military sycophancy is... annoying.

Alright, let's break this down as best we can.

Yeah, Let's Just Knock Out the Military Sycophancy

So, while I'd like to start with the most pressing matter first of the game's hook-less intro and lack of intrinsic motivation for Rover or the player aside from gacha rewards, this is the most controversial thing to discuss and I'd rather have it out in the open and talked about first so we aren't too distracted with my other messy points.

So, Wuthering Waves' first 3-ish Acts (especially Act 2) and honestly the whole Huanglong chapter of the main story has rather... pointed moments of focus toward military branches of Huanglong and Jinzhou. There's a lot of heavy praise for the military, how they're keeping out enemies and invaders, how they need to be supported at all cost, etc.. And on its own it's fine.

Like, really, no bullshit, I'm honestly fine with this on the surface.

A quick reminder folks, Wuthering Waves, for all it's technology and advancements, is still in a post-apocalyptic world where literal Sound Demons™ come out of the void to slaughter people with reckless abandon. This is shown the very first time you leave and enter the city of Jinzhou, as NPC soldiers are actively fighting Tacet Discord, some of which will die if you don't intervene and help them clear out mobs on your way out of the city. The training barracks is right outside the gate, there are military bases and camps in even the more remote places where you can also see more NPC soldiers fighting mobs. The lore states that only recently they've forced non-Resonators out of the army because they will legit die instantly to these things.

In this world having a strong military and being proud of it, especially when your city is the first line of defense, is something that's obviously going to come up. In the world of Wuthering Waves, a military force isn't there to potentially conquer another country and take their stuff, work as some glorified bodyguard for the nobility, or protect luxury resources of elite national interest. In Wuthering Waves, the army is thrown into the frontlines to be the wall against the Tacet Discord and likely die or be horribly injured in droves during the process. Make no mistake, despite Jinzhou elegant and peaceful appearance it is on the northern border where almost all the major Tacet Discord are formed. It is very much Chinese-Kislev with Sound Demons™ instead of Chaos Daemons. Not to mention you're traveling around with Yangyang, a member of the scouting military branch, who would obviously have strong opinions about the organization she serves, and Jianxin, who's an errant monk trying to still learn about the world and only has the words of her masters to go off of, and her masters are very pro-military.

It. Makes. Sense.

But the game sure as shit doesn't really show a lot of that in the text and dialogue. It really does come across as brown-nosing, and since the only voices against are main group are the Fractsidus it's hard to take their words at face value. It's not like the game plays up the fact that Yangyang is a military officers aside from Act 2, or that Jianxin is in actually kind of a childish musclehead that's only really good at martial arts and little else as her later Intimacy voice lines imply. The Military Sycophancy is more a product of rushed and lacking characterization than outright brown-nosing. Some minor dialogue in later acts actually question how righteous and moral some of those military leaders are in the heat of the moment, but you have to look for those voices to be heard.

But speaking of lacking characterization that brings me to my second point.

There's Not Really a Grounded Hook, is There?

To give a brief summary of the Huanglong story, the main character, Rover (yes, that seems to be the canonical name) wakes up after a vision/mysterious event of sorts while having no memories of their past or their goals. They are awoken by a friendly soldier and town guard and travels with their new companions to the city of Jinzhou after some shenanigans. The city's local leader, realizing an prophesy involving Rover is about to set off big things, attempts lure them to their side through both friendly and mysterious means. As Rover follows the trail they come to learn several parties and factions not only know about them, but have plans for them that don't require them to even know of main purpose of them being brought to the world, and those factions tease Rover with information hinting about their purpose before fleeing the scene. Through these meetings and the connections Rover makes throughout the story, they decide side with those that housed, protected, and cared for them and help save their country, unbeknown to them and several others going all according to the city leader's plan at the end of the day, even if said leader gambled a little at the end.

And while I'm skipping a lot of details here and there, namely involving the Fractsidus, Black Shores, and other parties, that sure as hell is a better summary of the plot than you'd find in the game. I kept out a lot of the terminology, but that's the basic idea. You're an unknown element, you have several people interested in you because of it, and... that's really it.

There's... nothing to truly hook you.

Look, I know using the G-word is bad form, but I'm gonna. In Genshin the story is simple: You're Aether/Lumine, some asshole god stole your sibling (or sent them back in time or something), you want to get her back and you have to solve every country's problem along the way while Dainslief just stands their menacingly. In Arknights...

...

...

Okay, honestly Wuthering Waves' story intro is about as bad as Arknights' with all the unfamiliar terminology and introducing people you don't care about until 3 more main story chapters, but you get my point.

Wuthering Waves doesn't have much to get you truly invested in the story. There's no real incentive for you to do things aside from mild curiosity and the gacha rewards. The fact that the little scavenger hunt Jinshi sends you on is super-lore heavy doesn't help either. There's a few good moments like most Jiyan confronting the phantom of his former superior, most of the stuff with Aalto and the Black Shore, Scar's occasional moments, and all of the final act, but those are few and far between with all the lore, exposition, and Yangyang's voice actor not having the greatest voice direction. You're dragged around a lot, but you don't really get to stay long enough to really care about the group. I think the only time they did was when they had you with Yangyang in Qichi Village learning about the place's backstory. That was good storytelling and world-building, as you are immediately curious about why the village was so fucked up and the implications were so... twisted. And best of all Scar was able to bring the lore explanation to a human, understandable level with his analogy of the wolf, shepherd, and sheep.

Which brings me to my last point.

So Many Goddamn Terms

The fact that they reference this in later Acts does not help, but the game has a lot of terminology in it. To summarize some of this, the world of Solaris-3 is a post-apocalyptic world based off frequencies, wavelengths, and a biiiiit of Chinese/Eastern fantasy thrown in for flavor. A lot of things revolve around that, but goddamn are there a lot of terms here. Even the official site just barely covers the basics. The Black Shores, the Fractsidus, the various nations and locations of importance. There's... a lot. A lot that isn't cover in as much depth as it should, or should just be simplified to its most important points. Part of me thinks this is because it's a Chinese game first and translating all the terms into something a Westerner can understand is just a mess in and of itself. However... this game also had quite a few years to cook as well and... it needed another year in the oven for reason aside from the glitches and lag.

Smaller Issues

Just gonna' put these in list form because I'm very tired now.

The Voice Direction: I think it's clear the voice acting isn't great, and I want to say its the director's fault. We've got a lot of decent talent here and a few people with good line reads. It just feels something is holding a lot of them back or the director isn't giving them enough context. Maybe now that the secrets out and we know who's voicing what they can actually direct things better now. Either way I'm hoping it gets better.

The Glitches and Stuttering: I'll save gameplay discussions for another posts, but for now I'll say I'm filling it minimally. It's not as bad as others, and I took some precautions to not deal with it as much, but it's still bad.

Rover's Character: So Rover actually has a lot more speaking lines than the average gacha self-insert character, almost to the point of them being their own character. However, the words coming out of their mouth are often just exposition, which only characterizes Rover as someone either intelligent or observant, which clashes with in-universe other characterizations of them being an almost mindless TD-destroying slaughter that cuts through mobs like its an addiction.

Uuuuugh... I know I said I'd say some positive things about the game, but... this has already left me a little drained. I'll talk more in detail about the positives at a later date, but for now I'm gonna' chill for a bit and maybe do a weekly boss.

I'll see you folks later.

[nt-studios]

Jam is over... so, now what?

Welp, the eighth Strawberry Jam has officially come to an end. Because of this, I wanna take a brief moment to share what I've learned the past month-and-a-half and my future plans up to this point...

As you may recall from my previous post, I made the choice to pause production on my current project to enter in this year's jam. I did this because I thought it'd be the perfect opportunity for me to take a small break from working on the same game I've been putting all of my attention towards for the past year now, and instead explore newer ideas that I've been wanting to tap into for a while.

I knew ahead of time that with a full-time job outside of game dev, this was gonna be a struggle. I would have to find the right amount of wiggle room within my busy day-to-day schedule to work on a fresh project under a tight deadline. And welp... the results kinda spoke for themselves. I ended up with an untested, unstable, nearly unplayable game by the time submissions closed. No matter how many bug fixes I tried to make postmortem, the game's concept just didn't work.

I'm gonna be completely frank here... this made me really upset the last couple of weeks. It completely shattered my confidence as a game dev and I nearly scrubbed my submission from the judging panel because I wasn't happy with what I made. But ultimately, I had to remind myself of just how much time and effort I put into this thing already. It would just make me feel worse thinking I did all this work for nothing.

All in all, though, this experience has made me understand my limitations a bit more. I felt trapped in my current project, like Mornin' Firebreather was the only thing I was meant to work on and nothing else. I was starting to feel a bit fatigued, so I used this opportunity as an excuse to break out of this cycle I've created for myself. But now I know that relying on a timed game jam to scratch this itch I've been having wasn't the right approach.

So now, what does this mean for the future of my game dev journey? The jam is over, so what're the next steps from here? Well... now I have a second project under my belt. Despite its flaws, the story is still something I'm quite proud of and honestly one I can't discard just because the game itself is crap. Therefore, I'm gonna be taking additional time to do some serious maintenance on The Makeup Exam (*without* a time constraint). I'll keep the original jam version up until maybe the end of this coming weekend, but then I'll remove it from itch and eventually do a re-release with an actual, playable product.

With that being said, I'm also gonna turn this Tumblr blog into a general game dev one, where I'll be posting devlogs and updates for ALL of my games instead of just Mornin' Firebreather. Now, this doesn't mean that I'm quitting production on Mornin' Firebreather. I still have big plans for that game that I haven't forgotten about 😜

But yea... that's pretty much it. I know this update was a little longer than usual, just had a lot going through my mind as of late.