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#It wasn’t easy but I lost it all
thic-honey · 2 years
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I had gained 93 pounds from July 2018 - April 2019 from being in that relationship. I was extremely depressed and stressed out. I wasn’t allowed to have any friends anymore after I went out with my girl best friend to a metal gig and bar afterwards in April 2018. Funny how that’s after they went out with their coworker to a bar and cheated on me. I must have triggered them when I went out with my girl friend to a bar. They also didn’t like when I hung out with my family so I was distant from them as well especially after my sister treated me to Universal Studios as a late Christmas gift and they got extremely upset with me. They got upset when I went out with my sister to a Japanese garden. They got upset and paranoid when my gay friend Lex showed up because he wanted to apologize and take me out for a drink to talk things out. They got upset when my other girl friend wanted to see me and the ocean one last time before they moved to the Arizona. I hardly seen anyone or went out while in that relationship because anytime I did or tried they got upset and started a fight. They had a tracker on me and anytime I went out they got upset and then accused me of being at mens houses even when I was sitting at home. It got to the point I didn’t even go out unless it was with them and they didn’t want to do anything most of the time. We spent most of it drinking in their room, and just sitting and eating. If we did go out it was to restaurants so they could drink. If we ever did go out in nature, they were drinking. Then it got to the point where I didn’t do anything anymore and would just sit in my room all day and post old photos on IG to feel relevant still, and being in bed all day would make me sleepy. If I fell asleep and stopped responding they would accuse me of having men over and having sex in my room and start a fight. I would tell them that I’m not doing that, I wouldn’t do that, and that my family is home. Sometimes it would even be the middle of the day. They would tell me that it doesn’t matter that my family doesn’t care and would hope that I’m with a man. I would tell her my family isn’t like that. Then when I asked them the same question, they said that their family has respect and morals and wouldn’t allow that to happen. Literally, we watched their mom and dad allow that drug guy to come in and go upstairs with Kelsi as she was dating J.R. and this happened for two weeks. They never had words worth face value ever. Then when I pointed that out to them, they got upset and said that Kelsi is a different situation, that they know how Kelsi is but they would expect more from them and be upset if they were to do that. Then when I would see them in person they would ask to see my phone and go through my stuff. If they seen random comments from men, old men, and even robots, they would get upset with me and accuse me of liking them. If I said thank you to people who complimented me they would think I was flirting with them. If I wanted to look good they would ask me who I’m looking good for. I felt I couldn’t look good and lost all motivation to take care of myself. Anything I ate made me fat because I didn’t leave my room and we didn’t do much together but drink alcohol, which also caused me to gain so much weight. I practically felt like an alcoholic because I drank so much in that relationship as that was all they wanted to do. Then they accused me of being on meth… what… because people gain weight from meth? Lol. Gawd this was miserable.
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tallest-tiptoes · 1 month
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what an episode. two i love yous, carina worried about maya, maya willing to be the one carrying, the throwback to maya’s iconic line…
and then that cliffhanger??
i’m well aware maya being in real danger has been something we’ve all been asking for but boy am i not strong enough for this
also the camera spinning around them at the end reminds me too much of their proposal so it’s hitting extra hard
i need maya to be okay, not just alive but well enough to continue fighting fires if she wishes to
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acrobattack · 3 months
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i think it’s fun that blossom and buttercup butt heads the most vs brick who targets boomer and more or less gets along swell with butch
#once again this is just me stating the obvious but i think about it a lot anyway#like with buttercup it’s a general refusal to follow the given instruction#vs boomer whose issue with brick tends to be incomprehension or lack of capability#and like. the difference between a leader who wants a Good Clean outcome vs one who just wants to have fun at all costs#butch has no reason to oppose brick because their goals basically align similar to how bubbles and blossom function#whereas buttercup Wants to be reckless under the instruction of someone who simply is Not#and boomers situation is a bit different because he really doesn’t oppose Brick much at all#he’s just a bit slow to catch on and will tend to speak out of turn out of excitement to contribute to a situation#vs butch who quite literally just parrots a lot of what brick says in a lot of his dialog#boomer is just ‘soft’ enough to be an easy target#it also Is just really fitting of brick to aim that kind of attitude at someone who’s less likely to do anything about it#whereas blossom generally has a real point she wants to drill into buttercups head so the resulting fight is. kind of the goal#idk where i’m going with this i just saw a post that made me want to organize these thoughts somewhere#bubble journal#editing to add more#like alright boomer is. undoubtedly a part of their group#i don’t think he’s a true odd one out he Isn’t#he scraps with them and likes the same things they do and generally likes to participate with them#he just so happens to be the ‘worst’ relative to the other two at being a Rowdy/ruff Boy#at least in the way they perceive one ought to be#so when he gets a bit too obviously naive he’ll get singled out#but it’s clear he can generally keep up with them anyway#if only for the fact that brick and butch can instantly tell when bubbles wasn’t able to#does this make sense i feel like i lost the plot
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crimeboys · 8 months
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anyone else thinking about ben hanscom
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nurse-buckley · 8 months
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.
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fuitygummy · 1 year
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I think I’m failing therapy
#personal fuity shit#I can’t answer my therapist’s questions#I feel like I’m only repeating myself every session#I can’t do the things she asks me to. and I don’t even know why. I just can’t#I don’t exercise. I don’t leave my room. I barely drink water. I have an eating disorder#I honestly don’t know what she could do for me. and I noticed she doesn’t either#maybe I truly am a lost cause#I’m stuck in place. can’t get better and sometimes seems to be getting worse#when I told her I don’t even want to live anymore she kinda got. pissed at me?#she made it sound like ‘being alive only because I don’t want to make my mom sad’ is the most insane and wildest thing she’s ever heard#and that I was crazy to even think about it#as if that wasn’t my only thought for like idk 8 years or so#ALSO she keeps putting my bisexual identity in question every opportunity she gets. like wtf#just because I’ve never hooked up with a girl doesn’t make me any less bi#‘are you truly bi or just curious?’ idk and idc ma’am you’re the one bringing this up and making it look like a problem#I’ve got lots of complaints but. it’s not easy to quit#I’d have to tell my mom an excuse as to why I want another therapist#and looking for a new therapist is just nightmare#I’m just tired. really wish I could think about killing myself more in depth without feeling guilty#thinking about how my mom’s life would be shattered and all the pain I’d cause her gives me goosebumps. it breaks my heart
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allofuswantgwinam · 4 months
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after having all this time to sit here and reevaluate everything with my ex and to have to accept that he really did not gaf about me has been such a roller coaster fr. i a was so brainwashed and lied to it’s disgusting
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adimilkys · 1 month
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JJK men waking up horny at night
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MDNI : 18+, smut, somnophilia, masturbation, p in v, degradation and much more
Contains : Gojo Satoru, Nanami Kento, Toji Fushigiro, Choso Kamo, Ryomen Sukuna (I was throwing up while writing his bitch ass 😾 I still love you Sukuna 😔)
small note : remember! Consent is everything, so let’s say the reader and character made an agreement on not minding if they would wake up to head etc. Not proof read
Gojo Satoru
He often got wet dreams, either waking up to morning wood or- waking up in the middle of the night.
And that’s what happened this time, it’s 3 am and Satoru let out a groan as his eyes opened, his whole face was red, it was so goddamn hot in here. He looked over at your peaceful face, wrapped his hands around you and pulled you closer.
He breathed in your smell, leaving kisses all around your neck and shoulders, slightly grinding his hard cock against your ass.
“Fuck… not letting me rest in my sleep either.” A quiet whine left his mouth, one hand going under his shirt that you were wearing, while the other one pulled your panties to the side, you usually only slept in his shirt and your panties, so he had easy access to your body.
“Baby… I need you…” two of his fingers entered you, he started moving them slowly and scissoring them, you let out a soft moan and clenched your thighs together- but still asleep.
He sped up his pace, taking his own cock into his hand and started stroking it. You let out a louder moan, feeling something tighten inside your stomach.
Suddenly your eyes shot open as your hand instantly went to grab his wrist. “T-Toru!” You cried as he added a third finger.
“M’sorry baby… I was so horny…” he was also close, groaning as he was stroking his cock faster.
“C-Can I put it in? Please please I need to feel you…” You nodded, not able to say anything, the only sounds leaving your mouth being moans of his name.
His fingers left your hole, you whined at the lost sensation but it was immediately replaced with his cock, you gasped at the feeling of being so full. He had your back against his chest. His arms were wrapped around your thighs, holding them up so it was easier for him to slide in.
His thrusts were slow and deep, hitting your cervix every time.
“Toru!! Ah- c-close!” You moaned, your nails were digging into his shoulder as he fastened his pace.
“S-shit… me too baby, me too.” One of his hands left your thigh, letting it lay on the bed, it instead went to your clit.
Your eyes rolled back and your back arched as you came, he wasn’t far behind, a few more strokes and he buried himself deep inside and shot his loads of cum.
As he pulled out you both were a panting mess. He moved your panties back, his hands wrapping around your waist and head hid in your shoulder.
“I’ll clean you up in the morning…”
Nanami Kento
It was rare for him to get wet dreams, it basically never happened, until this night.
He was rock hard and itching to touch you but he didn’t want to wake you up. You came back from work really late and exhausted, it was a hard day for you.
He could just jerk off, but he wanted you so bad. He got onto his knees, making you lay on your back as he pushed your legs apart, slowly pulling your panties off, making sure you won’t wake up.
He grabbed his cock in his hand and started stroking it, imagining it was your hand right now. You were so cute asleep, his beautiful wife.
You probably would tease him for days if you found out what he was doing, he just wanted to quickly get off to your body and go back to sleep.
He leaned down, kissing all over your exposed cleavage and neck, leaving small marks with every kiss, you’ll probably wake up and wonder where’d they come from.
He’ll explain himself tomorrow, right now it wasn’t important. What was is that he’s closer and closer, he started moving his hand faster, shooting out ropes all over your stomach that was exposed due to your shirt being ridden up, following with a muffled moan.
When he calmed down, he grabbed a tissue from the shelf and cleaned the cum off you. Putting your panties back down and laying down next to you, cuddling you.
Toji Fushigiro
He dreamt of you pregnant all over again, your round belly, filled with his child. He knows he has a breeding kink, so it’s obvious that he has gotten hard just from thinking about it.
Megumi wouldn’t mind a little brother, or maybe sister. Fuck, he wanted to get you pregnant again. He knows you’re on that shitty pill- he needs to flush them down the fucking toilet.
But right now all he needed was you. He grabbed your sleeping face and slammed his lips on yours, making you gasp, which allowed his tongue to enter.
“Mhmm- too-ji?” You muffled out barely awake, confused why in the middle of the night your man started furiously attacking your mouth.
“Fuck- feel what you did to me doll, got me all hard even in my sleep, yeah?” You let out another gasp, feeling his hard erection press against your clothed pussy.
Not letting you say anything he ripped your panties and immediately positioned his cock against your entrance.
“T-Toji! What if we wake up Megumi-”
“Then you have to quiet down all these pretty sounds, hm?” And just like that he slammed his dick inside of you. You quickly bit down on your hand, muffling your loud cry.
Not letting you adjust, he continued slamming in and out of you at a quick pace. Tears filled your eyes from the pleasure, trying the best to muffle your loud moans. Your other hand scratched at his back.
He grabbed the hand that was covering your mouth and replaced it with his lips, you could’ve sworn you felt his tongue in your throat, it was a messy kiss- tongues and teeth clashing together. Then he moved down to your neck, leaving marks all over it.
“A-Ah! S-Slo’down- T’muchhh!” Instead of actually slowing down, he only went faster if that was even possible at this point.
“I know you can take it, doll. You always do.” With every thrust you were closer, it was also hard to be quiet with this beast of a man slamming into you at an inhuman pace.
“Toji- close so close!”
“Come on, cum f’me” Your head threw back, not able to contain the loud cry that left your mouth, his pussy clamped down so hard on his cock that he came short after you, letting out a load groan as he filled you up.
“One more round?”
“Toji- wait, AH-”
Choso Kamo
You’re his first ever partner, he’s still not used to all those relationships things. So just imagine his confusion when he woke up at 2 am, his dick rock hard and his body hot.
He looked over to you, sleeping so beautifully, you were asleep and didn’t even do anything- what happened??
He couldn’t go back to sleep, he was too horny. You won’t be mad if he wakes you up, right?
He carefully shook you, calling out your name. After a minute you opened your eyes, mumbling out some incorrect words. When you saw it was Choso who was sitting up, looking all worried you immediately raised yourself up on your hands.
“Love…? What’s wrong?” You asked, his face got red immediately, embarrassed to say what happened.
“I- woke up and my dick was hard, I didn’t know what happened so I woke you up.” You stared at him and let out a soft laugh, sitting up next to him.
“Oh baby, you probably just had a wet dream.” He looked at you confused, still not understanding what that meant.
“A wet dream is when you dream about something sexual.” He let out a quiet ohh, you shook your head smiling.
“Want me to help?” He didn’t move for a while before slowly shaking his head, still embarrassed that he had to wake you up for that. You took his dick in your hands, slowly moving them up and down before lowering your head and leaving kisses all over his cock.
His hand buried itself in your hair as he let out a quiet moan, begging you to not tease him. You complied to his request, taking as much of him as you can in your mouth.
He slightly thrust his hips forward, making the head of his cock hit the back of your throat. “M-m’sorry… had too-“ he whined as your plump lips dragged on his dick, your mouth so warm. The rest that you couldn’t fit in was wrapped around your hand, not being forgotten.
The way you looked up at him, the way that your mouth moved- he was getting closer and you knew it, your movement got faster and he gripped your hair tightly, letting out a moan as he came inside your mouth.
You swallowed it all, giving his head a last kiss before raising yourself up and wiping the corners of your lips with your hand. “You did so good love” he blushed at the praise,
“I’ll repay you tomorrow, okay?”
“Choso, you know you don’t have to-”
“But I want to.”
Ryomen Sukuna
He will not wake you up and admit that he got hard because of a stupid dream, there’s absolutely no way. He won’t ‘jerk off’ either, that would be just low of him.
So he will indeed wake you up but by his cock inside of you. He immediately got to work, ripping your panties off and throwing them somewhere in the room, getting in between your legs as he picked them up and held them against your chest.
He spit down on your pussy, the cold sensation making you shiver in your sleep. He grabbed one of his cocks and positioned it against your entrance, he would use both but getting you prepared for the other one would take too long.
And with a quick thrust he was deep inside of you, filling you up. The sudden intruder immediately woke you up, letting out pleasurable but also painful scream.
“Ngh—! wha-?!” Your eyes darted around the room before laying on the huge frame of Sukuna, who was glaring at you.
“Quiet, brat. This is your fault so now take it.” Your back arched off the mattress as he suddenly started moving, still half asleep not knowing what’s happening.
“Ryo-! Wait! Let me-” before you could finish your sentence a loud moan left your mouth, he did not plan on giving you any mercy with how fast he was ramming inside you.
You yelped as he slapped your ass harshly, “That’s for waking me up, brat.” You wanted to reply to him but you couldn’t form the words, even if you did you knew that would just result in another slap.
He didn’t even bother at pulling out as he picked you up and flipped you onto your stomach like a ragdoll. Continuing with his harsh slams, you felt every vein, with how big he was he was hitting every spot inside your pussy.
His hand grabbed your head and pushed you further into the pillow, making you arch more. He was slamming into you so hard it felt like he was rearranging your guts. The knot in your stomach tightened as you clenched around him.
“Cum, slut.” With his words your hands gripped onto the pillows and with almost a scream-like moan you came so hard you saw stars, but even with your tight pussy clamping around him so hard his thrusts didn’t slow down.
He once again grabbed your body, now picking it up and making you sit on his lap, your back against his chest as he bounced you up and down. You were so fucked out, tears streaming down your cheeks, your tongue out as spit leaked from the corners of your mouth.
“Look at you, so greedy for my cock.” He smirked, pinching your nipple.
“Ryooo— I can’t-” he slapped your ass once again, making you let out a cry, feeling another orgasm coming soon.
“Close already?” He scoffed “Pathetic” you squirmed as his hand went to your clit. One hand on your throat, second on your boobs, third wrapped around your waist making you bounce and fourth on your clit.
“Haa- n-nono-“ you cried as the next orgasm hit you, squirting all around his cock and hand. Leaving you a panting and overstimulated mess.
“What a messy pussy…” he groaned as he slammed you down, cock buried so deep there was a bulge on your stomach as he filled you with his load.
You were sure you would fall down on the bed if he wasn’t holding you up. He pulled his cock out just to fill you again with his second one.
“Did you think we were done, brat?”
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brrr vent post cast your eyes away!
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slvttyplum · 4 months
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toji wasn’t a guy with patience; if he wanted something, he was going to ensure that’s what he got.
so whenever you moaned and complained about wanting to ride him, he let you, but only for a couple of seconds before he gripped your hips and started fucking into you himself.
he didn’t have time for the nonsense you were spouting. all he knew was that his dick was withering inside of you while you tried to pick a speed you wanted to go at.
toji rolls his eyes every five seconds as the grip on your hips gets tighter as you mumble to yourself, pick up your hips, and then shakily push them back down.
“toji stop! i got it.”
“no, the fuck you don’t.” he takes his hands and grabs your wrist as he pushes his hips up and pounds into you with no remorse, just a smirk on his face.
he didn’t care whether you were upset with him or not; you were taking way too long, and he just wanted to fuck you.
thats why he preferred for you to just lay pretty beneath him while he pounded into your tight cunt. something easy and enjoyable for the both of you.
when you noticed that he didn’t want you to ride him, you tried to be sneaky with it and just let him fuck into you, but then mindlessly turned him on his back.
he’ll smirk and laugh under his breath when he realizes he knows what you’re doing and watch your every move as you get nervous and try to hurry up and ride him, but... oops, you’re too slow.
toji flips you around and has you in doggy. before you could protest, the only thing that comes out of your mouth is whimpers and moans.
“fuck… there we go. you’re tightening around me. let’s keep it like this, hm?”
it’s not like he didn’t give you chance after chance to redeem yourself, because he did, but you blew it every single time.
he can’t say it wasn’t cute watching you stutter and stammer over your words and mumble to yourself as your hands are placed on his chest and you try to ride him.
the attempts were very cute, teasing in fact, but he couldn’t deal with it. your pussy was a water park; every time he put his hand or dick anywhere near it, it would drip, so imagine how he felt when his dick was inside your wet pussy and it just sat there with no stimulation.
“toji stop! i have it this time. just be patient.” that word irked him, because how more patient could he really be? one time he let you go on for ten minutes as you mindlessly bounced on his cock, and he couldn’t deal.
you didn’t have the aggression he had when it came to fucking. your touch was soft while his was rough, but the two opposites made for a fine outcome.
he came so many times inside of you that he lost count. so he wanted to have control, because that way, the both of you could cum back to back with no complications.
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nope-body · 1 year
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.
#my body is getting worse#it’s getting worse at an exponential rate the way I was scared of and I don’t know what to do#I don’t know if I even have anyone to go to because I can’t just go to a friend and say#hey my body’s failing me and my mind is failing me and I need help with figuring out what to do and also I’m really fucking scared#but I don’t have a therapist. a doctor wouldn’t provide all the support I need because I need to talk to someone about it. the counseling#center here is generally not the best and I don’t trust them to help me come to terms with being disabled. there’s no adult here that I’m#that close with and either way with pretty much anyone who isn’t a close friend I’d have to give them at least a brief rundown of everything#or explain everything from the ground up depending on their level of understanding#I’m not just going to the ODA because what would they even do?#the people in the disability group I’m a part of are wonderful but I’d have to reach out to someone in particular because I’m not just going#to monopolize club time because that’s not what it’s for#and just. everyone respects me because I can do things and I have learned through experience that respect is earned and lost by how much you#can or cannot do. and even if I go to someone now they might be sympathetic because I’m struggling but the minute I can’t do something they#see as easy or the minute I suddenly can’t do something they were expecting me to do I lose that respect and then I have to find someone#new who I haven’t let down yet#I missed work today and there wasn’t anyone to replace me and we work solo shifts. so there just wasn’t a building monitor.#I let people down. that’s literally the easiest job in the world you just sit there and i couldn’t even get there to do my job#I don’t know if I’m ridiculously burnt out or if my entire baseline of functioning has lowered but I’m doing way worse than I was before and#I’m scared. I’m so scared. because I got my first cane over the summer and less than a year later I’m like ten times as bad off#despite the pain meds and heating pad and breaks and cane and changing how I work in the world and less work and everything#despite what the physical therapists said I’m not stabilizing. a pain level of 0 still sounds impossible. I’m getting worse and I’m scared
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leviathanspain · 4 months
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not without him
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anthony bridgerton x reader
synopsis: you knew birth would be no easy feat, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to do it without him
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you clutched onto the white bedsheets, they were drenched with blood, and you were writhing on the bed as the doctor shouted orders at the nurses.
one had a cloth to your forehead, dabbing away your sweat and your tears. you couldn’t stop crying, it was an unbearable pain, that only got worse as the night went on.
violet had tried to prepare you, coming to her for advice on how to birth a bridgerton child. she had her most difficult birth with hyacinth, and just hearing her story sent chills down your spine.
anthony had been away in london when you went into labor. you knew he shouldn’t have left aubrey hall so close to the end of your pregnancy, but being the viscount meant there were things that required him present. you had hoped that your child would have some decency and arrive after the father, but the urge to push only became greater.
you feared that anthony wouldn’t make it, he was supposed to be here an hour ago, having rushed from london upon hearing the news.
the nurse looked down at you, “you have to push, my lady.” her voice quivered, as if she could feel your emotion. you teared up more, “no please- we have to wait for the viscount.” you felt weak, and you faintly heard the doctor shout that you were losing blood.
the nurse looked down again, and seemed firm, “you have to push, there is no time to spare if we wait for the viscount.” she dabbed your forehead again, “you and this baby will die if you don’t push now.”
you cried harder, “i need him here. i can’t do it without him.” you were scared, frightened by all these unfamiliar people. yes they were there to help you give birth to your first child, but you didn’t care, it wasn’t your husband dabbing your forehead or encouraging you.
your vision went fuzzy around the edges and your head fell back into the mounds of pillows that held you up. you could still hear the door push open, shouts being echoed into the room and finally, “let me through-“ his voice.
you heard a clatter of gear hit the wooden floor and you felt relief as he rushed to your side. anthony, still cold with the winter air, brushed the hair from your face, kissing your cheek. he saw how weak you looked, and could see the doctor’s expression.
“you can do it.” he whispered sweetly, “i’m here, you can do it.” he grabbed your hand, clutching it tightly and with his encouragement, you did the one thing you had been putting off.
the nurse over you seemed overjoyed that you were finally listening, there was fear among the doctor and staff that you would bleed out before anthony got there.
you grunted, weak from the blood loss. “push, my lady, push!” the nurse above you shouted, and you grunted loudly, doing as she said.
there was a brief moment of pause, relief that washed over you as you heard a newborn’s cry. you blinked away the sweat, feeling the damp cloth across your skin as you looked over at anthony, who hadn’t taken his eyes off of you. he was smiling brightly, but tears brimmed in his eyes, “you did it.” he whispered, “my lady….” he brushed the side of your face with a hand, and you closed your eyes, exhaustion washing over you.
you could see the light creeping through the curtains. it had been kept dark for you, candles burning just as you liked, even wearing your favorite nightgown. you could feel the pain, that ache that reminded you of what had happened.
you called out to your handmaid, watching as the door opened and instead, in stepped anthony holding the baby in his arms. your eyes softened, and you cooed, “my love.” you beckoned him to the bed, and anthony sat down carefully, the newborn in his arms was peacefully sleeping.
“good morning.” he kissed your forehead, “you have no idea how much i love you. i-“ he faltered, looking down at the baby to compose himself before he continued, “i almost lost you. please,” he looked at you, “please don’t ever scare me like that again. i beg you.” he whispered. he was happy at the birth of your son, but he wouldn’t have been if you had lost your life.
you looked at him, nodding. you didn’t want to say anything, instead looking down at the baby and resting your head on anthony’s shoulder, “have you thought of a name?” you noticed the baby’s fell head of hair and smirked, “looks like he got my hair.” you looked at the baby’s nose, “and your nose.” you laughed slightly, and anthony shrugged, “everyone says he looks like you more.”
his siblings must’ve arrived in from london. you smiled, but anthony knew what that smile was, “you must rest. the doctor said you lost a lot of blood, that you shouldn’t even think to lift a finger today.”
you sighed, “i won’t protest, i am feeling exhausted..” you didn’t know how to feel, your heart had never felt so much love all at once, “my boys.” you cooed, touching the baby’s hair as anthony kissed your forehead again.
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babyyhoneyyy · 15 days
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I wanna kiss your neck H.S
“You mean a lot to me too, Harry. You’re my best friend.”
He grinned. “Oh? You let all your best friends eat your pussy and choke you, then?”
“Don’t be a dick,” she smacked his chest lightheartedly, “we can try like… friends with benefits?”
Or,
The one where Y/N and Harry are best friends, but they’ve crossed a big, fat line that says otherwise.
You can read this as a stand-alone but its more fun as a part two to this one <3
word count: 4K
content warning: mature. I got a little carried away 😭 also fwb!harry (my fav)
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When Y/N woke up the next day, Harry was pressed tightly to her back, arm slithered around her waist and stuffing her impossibly closer to his slumbering body. She could feel the rumbling of his snores against her spine and he must have sneaked into her bed after she fell asleep, ditching the couch pallet she prepared for him in her living room. He had a habit of doing that so she wasn’t shocked or alarmed by his sudden appearance behind her.
All Y/N could really think about was what the actual heck happened the past night when Harry offered to ‘make her feel good.’ She would be lying if she said he didn’t make her come harder than anyone else ever had. The way he worked her body had her all hot and bothered again, restless in Harry’s tight grip when he groaned all of a sudden, all raspy and deep right in her ear, “stop moving, Berry.”
Berry.
He hadn’t called her that in a while. It was a nickname he often resorted to when Y/N and him were little, their first meeting being one where Harry caught Y/N blue-stained and sticky-fingered in the playground because she was inhaling the berries her mum packed her for a snack. He pointed at her face with a stern look and said the singular word, Berry. And from then on it stuck, all the way up till they were seniors in high school, where the name lost its appeal and Harry got whisked away into the hot, popular persona he adopted at the time.
After that he sparingly said the word, it only slipping out in unconscious or vulnerable moments, and apparently that morning was one too.
When she twisted in his grasp so she faced him, Harry blinked one eye open, “go back to bed. It’s the weekend for fucks sake.” He shuffled so he was facing her on his side, not withdrawing his hand fully as it still rested in the dip of her waist and thumbed over the smooth skin there. He had ditched his sweater for the night, just in a pair of soft sweatpants. His hair was pulled back in a bun but most of the strands were free now, thanks to his restless tossing and turning in bed. “I know it's the weekend, it doesn’t mean we laze around all morning. I have things to do.”
“Who said anything about all morning? Just five more minutes.”
Five more minutes turned into ten, and ten minutes later Harry somehow made his way between her thighs again. It started with him stroking her side, up to her shoulder and scratching his nails against her scalp. When she would try to make a move to leave bed and freshen up, he thumbed over her jugular and pushed her to lay on her back, scooting closer to her so he could lean over her side.
“Want me to eat you out again?”
It’s a terrible ploy to keep her in bed— one so outrageous it actually works and Y/N finds herself quickly nodding, slipping her hands in his hair to pull his hair tie. He kissed down her neck, sloppy and slow, all the way across her tummy and the tops of her thighs. She didn’t wear anything on her bottom half since she thought she was going to be sleeping alone but that proved a good decision when Harry had easy access to her sopping cunt.
From then on it was as good as it was the first time. In fact, it might have been even better. He was passionate as he stuffed his face into her, lifted her thighs so they bracketed his cheeks like he wanted to suffocate himself. His tongue was unrelenting, wriggling between her folds and making those noises that made Y/N’s face and neck go red as she pulled his locks harshly between her fingers. When he pulled out his favourite move of isolating her clit and flicking the tip of tongue against it hard and fast, it had Y/N shaking and whining out loud. She was brought to the edge very quickly after that, back arching and a loud gasp spilling from her mouth.
Harry popped off from her with a filthy sound, wiped his chin with the back of his hand and smirked up at her fucked-out state.
After that, it became some sort of trend.
Every weekend, Harry would come over to her apartment like he normally did, they’d chat about their week, pick out a movie and crack open a bag of chips only for Harry to nudge her mid-movie with his eyes sparkling and lip between his teeth and he’d ask her if he could go down on her again. So he would, and it would be amazing every time. Somehow he was even more enthusiastic than he was the last time, licking into her eagerly. It was like he wanted to drown in all she offered and one night he refused to let her go, slicking her folds over and over again until she came about three times.
Everytime he made her come she’d ask to return the favour since he was always sporting a painfully large bulge when he pulled away from her. Yet every time he politely declined— told her he was fine and would take care of it himself.
But this time Y/N was not letting that happen.
She was hell-bent tonight on getting him to come, no matter how much he persisted she didn’t need to do anything for him. Y/N knew tonight would be like the others— he’d find himself face-first between her thighs within 20 minutes of walking through her door. It’s not like she didn’t appreciate his very obvious oral fixation, it was just that her body was beginning to get used to his delivery of orgasms every weekend and she now had a different sort of ache that she needed to get fixed.
The ache to be filled up by him.
The burn of his cock inside of her was one she found herself craving often. She knew he was big by the way he would sometimes press his bulge against her thigh for some relief. All she wanted was for him to sink inside of her, reach all those spots she just knew he’d be able to hit and fuck into her nice and deep.
Obviously this was crossing a big, fat, red line.
Y/N and Harry were friends.
Best friends, in fact, ever since they were in the playground. Just the fact that he was spending his weekends suffocated by her pussy was definitely against the rules childhood best friends were bound to follow, but maybe they could venture into something more than just that— and Y/N didn’t mean dating.
Maybe something like a friends with benefits situation.
Yeah, Y/N didn’t mind having an arrangement of that sort with Harry. Besides, she trusted him, and surely their bond was strong enough to go through with it.
When he arrived at her door at about 7PM, Y/N jumped to quickly open it, finding Harry standing there with a single dimple making an appearance, hair pushed back and clad in a pair of matching sweatpants and a hoodie. He didn’t waste a beat in pressing himself against her, his greedy hands all over her waist as he walked her back into her apartment. “Hey,” he breathed, kissing her just below her ear, “I missed you.”
Y/N heard the door shut behind him, her eyelids fluttering under the feel of his lips against her skin, suckling warm kisses across the skin. “You saw me last weekend.”
“Mm. Too long.”
Harry’s voice was muffled against her skin, and he pulled back to brush his nose against her, his hands now sneakily resting against her bare waist. “It’s just seven days you horndog.”
“Heyy. Don’t say that like you hadn’t missed me either.” He pouted, shoving her hip so she fell back on the couch. Harry quickly climbed over her, hips snug between her thighs as he tenderly brushed her hair away from her forehead. Y/N could feel her cheeks heating up as he stared right at her. “Yeah,” she accepted defeat, like his eyes had fed her some sort of truth serum, “I missed you too. A lot.”
He must have liked her answer, because he pecks her cheek, then the corner of her mouth, then skips right over to the top of her chest exposed by the low neckline of her shirt, “did you, now? What about me did you miss, Berry?”
She didn’t respond for a while, lost in the feel of his mouth against her skin, trailing lower and lower until he pushed her shirt up and over her tits. The peaks of her nipples were pebbled, practically begging for Harry to wrap his mouth around them. Warm fingers slivered up her tummy to squeeze both her tits in his palm harshly. “Asked you a question.”
“Fuck,” those same fingers travelled over to her nipples, pinching the sensitive bud until her back arched off of the sofa, “um, your mouth.” The words barely left her throat as she struggled to keep her composure, squeezing Harry between her thighs so tightly he was afraid he’d get bruises on his hips. “That’s nice. Using me for my mouth, then are you? Quite selfish if you ask me.” Y/N knew he was only joking, but she couldn’t help bucking her hip into his, twisting his hair between her fingers.
“I’m not selfish! Just… need you.”
She barely recognised her voice, it sounding whiney and desperate as Harry finally dragged his tongue against her nipple, index finger and thumb bracketing her breast as he held it to his mouth. The way he moved his tongue was almost calculated; careful and thoughtful as he figured out the way to best please her— flicking the muscle against her bud, grazing it with his teeth and lulling long, slow circles around it. “S’okay. You can have my mouth. It’s all yours anyway.”
He popped off from her chest, leaving her a heaving and whimpery mess, though before he could fit his shoulders between her thighs, Y/N was quick to pull him back up with his hair so he was level with her face. The burn against his scalp made him groan as he stared down at Y/N, quite annoyed that she stopped him from having his treat.
“I want something else tonight,” she breathed. His eyebrows dipped slightly as he brought a large hand to wrap around her throat— one of his favourite ways to hold her, “what do you need, princess?”
He was subtly grinding his hips against her, pinning her against the couch as she tried to figure out the words to say what she wanted. “I need you to fuck me. Please.”
All movements paused. His fingers tightened around her throat and his eyes became a shade darker. “S’that what this is then? All needy to get my cock inside of you?” Harry’s thumb subtly caressed the side of her throat as he nudged his nose against hers, “hmm?”
”Yes, please. I need it so bad, Harry.”
She gave him the best doe eyes she could, biting her lip for added effect. Even though Harry was a weak man for a pretty pout, he had to think rationally here. His eyes softened as he stared down at his best friend— if he could even call her that at this point. “Are you sure, Berry? I don’t… I don’t want to do anything that could ruin what we have,” his thumb made its way to her cheek where he stroked lovingly, “you mean a lot to me.”
“You mean a lot to me too, Harry. You’re my best friend.”
He grinned. “Oh? You let all your best friends eat your pussy and choke you, then?”
“Don’t be a dick,” she smacked his chest lightheartedly, “we can try like… friends with benefits?”
This made him somehow smirk even wider and Y/N’s cheeks got warmer, “gosh I just am that irresistible aren’t I?” She rolled her eyes, “don’t make me take it back.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He kissed her forehead then her nose, “‘course I’ll fuck you. I’ll do whatever you want, baby.”
With that, he pulled his sweater off of his head and helped Y/N with her shirt. She had seen him shirtless before numerous times but never allowed herself to ogle him in a sexual way. She didn’t hold back as she let her fingers trail all over his tanned skin, squeezing his sides and pulling him closer so there was practically no space between the two. Harry giggled at her desperation. “Horny, Berry?”
Y/N smacked his head for real this time. “Shut up.”
He rubbed the spot she struck, “that hurt.”
“Well too bad,” she let her fingers work on the knot of his sweats, hastily trying to push them off of his hips but Harry had other plans— long fingers came to wrap around her wrists, pulling her hands away from him and pinning them next to her head. “You’re so fucking bratty all the time. Thought maybe all those orgasms were helping but clearly I wasn’t giving it to you hard enough.”
She whined in his grasp, trying to break free. While he held her hands in one of his, he let the other trail down her body and slip into her shorts. He came into contact with her wet cunt immediately, sliding his index and middle finger through the folds, slowly, surely. He tsked, “slutty pussy.” The words went straight to her throbbing clit as she bucked her hips against his hand, though she was crying out loud when Harry let his fingers slap over the bundle of nerves. “Be patient, Y/N.” She frowned at his words, trying her best to keep her composure.
All the while his fingers continued to explore her folds, not applying any pressure where she really wanted, just feeling around like her wetness amused him. The moment she felt like she was actually going to cry, he slipped a finger into her heat. “Fuck,” he pumped his digit slowly, “perfect little cunt.”
Y/N’s fingers twisted and writhed under his hold, back arching as he showered her in praises, lips pressing against her jaw and neck. Her thighs shook when he curled his finger against that one spot, and she knew a couple more seconds of this and she’d be coming undone around his fingers.
Before she could succumb to her orgasm, Harry pulled his fingers out and stuffed them into her mouth. Her opportunity to protest was taken away from her as he forced her to taste herself, stroking his fingers against her tongue, “s’that good, baby? You’re lucky I’m sharing today. Can’t let anyone else know how sweet this pussy is for me.”
Once she was done sucking him clean, he straightened up to pull her shorts off and got off the couch to kick off his own sweats and boxers. His cock slapped up against his abdomen, long and thick and the way it throbbed looked like it was almost painful. One of his hands came to wrap around it while the other pulled a condom out of his wallet. He climbed back on the couch and pulled her by the hips. Y/N slid closer to him, “ready for me, Berry?” He murmured as he rolled the condom on his length.
Y/N couldn’t find the words to tell him how badly she needed him, only let her nails dig into his skin and nodded eagerly, “yes, yes, yes please. I’m so ready, Harry, need i—“
He didn’t let her finish, cutting her off with a deep groan as he impaled her with his dick. She could feel him snug against her— all of him inside all of her. The squelch that resounded in the room when they came together was loud and embarrassing as Y/N moaned uncontrollably, pulsing rhythmically around him trying to adjust to his size. His slow place built up to something faster and harder, the sound of skin slapping skin making Y/N even wetter.
It was a surprise he wasn’t straight up slipping out of her with how wet she was. She could feel it coat the inside of her thighs when he brought one of her legs up and over his shoulder. The new angle made everything feel a hundred times better— he was hitting places she didn’t even know she could reach. Harry’s hands held onto her hips tightly, one of them sneaking over her mound as his thumb came in contact with her clit. The added stimulation made her squeeze her eyes shut, head angling away and into the sofa beneath her.
He didn’t let her look away, though, as he bit back a moan and brought his free hand to grab her face. His fingers squeezed her cheeks as he manhandled her to face him, “don’t fucking look away from me,” he leaned closer to her. His hips stopped pumping and he resorted to deep, filthy grinds against her g-spot. “Look at me when I’m fucking you. Bet no one’s ever given it to you so good, hmm?”
She can’t find it in herself to come back with a witty remark, so far gone with the feel of him stuffed inside her. It was like he reduced her to nothing but babbles and whines, “uh-huh, uh-huh, yes please, Harry.” Her fingers found his hair again, pulling the locks hard and then tucking them behind his ear. He found himself locked in a tender moment when his eyes met hers, and he pressed a soft kiss to her brow bone before he began thrusting again.
Somehow he was harder, deeper, faster and pulling so much out of Y/N she was ready to burst. Her moans began sounding annoying to herself but she just couldn’t help it, especially not when he began circling her clit again. It took only a couple more seconds and she was coming around his cock, back lifting off of the couch almost too harshly as she clamped down around him. “Tha’s it, gorgeous. So beautiful you are, Berry.”
Harry worked her through it, her warm, wet walls beckoning him closer to his end. “Wait!” She called desperately when her orgasm subsided, “come… come in my mouth, please?”
“Jesus Christ.” He pulled out quickly, ripping the condom off and letting his fingers gather her arousal. The sensation made her flinch in sensitivity but she got over it when she saw him use her arousal as a lubricant, pumping himself as he leaned over her body. Y/N dropped her mouth open and stared right into his eyes. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
When he came, it was a lot.
White, hot spurts that Y/N tried to catch with her tongue, and he just kept coming and coming and coming. The sounds he made were enough to make her all riled up again— his eyebrows furrowed, hair tickling his upper back as he tilted his head. Some of it landed on her jaw and chin but she swallowed as much as she could; which was only what actually made it on her tongue. One long stroke was delivered, and only then was he done, posture slouching as he lazily eyed Y/N. “Incredible.”
She giggled at his praise, still covered in his release. His eyes on her were burning and a second later a mischievous glint made her tummy flutter, “one second.” He leaned over the couch to grab his phone, pulling open the camera app. Y/N’s eyes widened when she realised what he was implying. Harry smirked, “just as a keepsake.”
One of his ringed hands came up to her jaw, cupping it tightly as he forced her head to face the camera. The sight could make Harry come all over again— Y/N’s lips were parted, his come painting her jaw and chin and decorating the edge of her bottom lip. Her neck was littered in purple bruises from all the time he spent there and his hand served as an accessory which she wore with pride. His rings felt cool against her skin when they slid across her jugular.
“Say ‘queef’!”
Y/N’s nose scrunched, “Harry!”
He laughed when she slapped his hand away and quickly kissed her forehead, “I’ll be right back, babe.” Y/N hummed as he left to go to the bathroom, the sight of him covering his dick with his shirt with his bum out making her laugh.
She was so happy.
It might have been the post-orgasm high, but she couldn’t shake the feeling. Obviously the fact that she was doing all of this with her best friend was a big, blaring red flag but it was like she just didn’t care. He made her feel good and confident in her skin— something she hasn’t felt with a number of her past partners.
Just as she fluttered her eyes shut, the sound of Harry’s phone startled her. It was probably his roommate, Niall, wondering where he was. It was nearing 9PM.
She grabbed his phone to silence it, but what she saw made her freeze in her spot.
A picture of a gorgeous brunette flashed across the screen, her eyes twinkling and lips painted red.
Chelsea 🩵
She was smiling wide, and just on the corner of the screen did Y/N catch a glimpse of Harry pressing his lips to her temple.
Her Harry.
The one who’s been her best friend ever since she was in diapers.
Her Harry.
The one who just fucked the living daylights out of her.
Y/N didn’t know what to do so she just watched the phone ring and ring. It was like all the air from her lungs was stolen. Suddenly she felt gross lying here covered in Harry’s come, all that confidence melting away from her body. She felt used. Before she could let the tears threaten her eyes, Harry appeared in the living room. She dropped his phone before he could see.
He walked over to her with a towel in his hand. “You alright?” He asked her, noticing her stoic expression and quiet demeanour. “Mhmm.” Harry must have thought she was just tired after her orgasm, humming as he ran the towel across her thighs and then her jaw. “We did make quite a mess didn’t we?”
He was smirking, trying to get a rise out of her but she just couldn’t stomach the lump in her throat. She faked a laugh, “yeah.” If he noticed her dull responses, he didn’t say anything. When he was done, Y/N sat up and pulled her shirt over head. She was gnawing harshly on her lip, swallowing down tears and anger and confusion as she watched him pick up his phone. His eyebrows furrowed.
“Is everything okay?”
She didn’t know why she asked. Whatever he would say would only make matters worse for her. “Uh, yeah. Jus’ Niall wondering when I’ll be home.” He flashed her a small smile and Y/N felt like the walls of her apartment were crumbling around her. “I have to call him back, Berry, I’ll be right back.” A kiss was pressed to her cheek as he quickly left the room.
Y/N felt like she was suffocating under the weight of his lie. She was disgusted by herself— the same touches she yearned for and looked forward to each weekend now felt like a burden on her body, dirtying her. She wouldn’t let herself cry; she couldn’t let Harry see her like this.
a minute later he walked back in and began dressing himself. “I’ve got to go, Y/N. Sorry, I feel like an ass leaving you so soon but Niall needs me urgently,” he walked over to her, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
She swallowed down another sob, “mhmm.”
He pecked her forehead and whispered goodbye, leaving swiftly without so much as another glance in her direction. Only when her door slammed shut did she allow her tears to spill over her cheeks. They poured and poured like a leaky faucet as Y/N pulled her knees into her chest.
This was probably why he didn’t want to fuck her in the first place.
He was getting his fix elsewhere, and Y/N felt like a fool for ever believing they were anything more than best friends.
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Divider by @firefly-graphics
PART 3
HEYYYY this is just a load of filth :p let me know what your thoughts are and if you enjoyed it !! LEAVE FEEDBACK PLEASE ITS ALWAYS NICE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK !! LIKE REBLOG COMMENT REPLY YADA YADA KISS KISS GOODNIGHT!! xxx
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artdcnaldson · 9 days
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NEED art and patrick to find out I'm a virgin and offer to teach me how to kiss and how to fuck and use eachother as examples and guide me and tell me I'm doing a good job and reward me for being such a good student and come back later and quiz me to see if I remember everything they taught me ugh obsessed with them individually and as a unit
This has lived rent free in my mind for literally forever. I can’t stop thinking about it, it haunts my every waking moment.
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Rating: E (18+)
Warnings: Making out, Handjob lessons, guys being pervs, not a love triangle they just all want to fuck each other
A/N: unedited bc I wrote this while on the clock okay whatever. Enjoyyyy and if u want me to continue this lmk >:)
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“I think it’s sweet,” Patrick said, and you could hear the amusement in his voice, practically dripping from every syllable. “The last American virgin. You belong in a museum.”
You rolled your eyes and tossed your empty Taco Bell cup at him— the ice rattled and it leaked a puddle of condensation onto the ground. “You could try not to be a dick about it.”
Art’s dorm room was hot and sticky thanks to a faulty AC, which meant the three of you lounging on the floor by his open window, sucking down soda watered down by melted ice cubes. You were down to a T-shirt and shorts, they were down to their boxers. It wasn’t lost on you that it was an intimate situation to be in— barely dressed, crammed into the shoebox of a dorm. And of course Patrick had dug his fingers in until you admitted your secret— you had made it all the way to college totally unfucked.
Patrick leaned forward, smiling the smarmy smile that tended to wear at your last nerve. “So you’re a virgin, but like,” he leaned in, so close you could feel body heat radiating from him. He dropped his voice, just above a whisper. “How much of a virgin, really? You’ve at least gone to third, right?” You glared, but shook your head.
“Second?” Art supplied, suddenly jumping in with an eager sort of curiosity.
“What? No, I don’t even know what that means,” you admitted. You sighed before you spoke up. “I’ve only ever kissed one guy and one girl, and it was during a game of spin the bottle, like, junior year.”
“How?” Patrick asked.
Your brows furrowed. “How? I spun the bottle, it landed on the person, I leaned in, put my lips against theirs, and that was it.”
Patrick sighed. “Just fucking show me how.” He looked at you expectantly, inching even closer.
With an annoyed sigh, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his— mouth closed, lips firm. When you sat back, Patrick and Art were both grinning.
“What?” You asked with a frown.
“That’s how you kiss on the playground in elementary school,” Art said, unable to contain his laughter. “C’mere.”
You crawled forward, stopping in front of the blond. His hand settled on your jaw, coaxing you forward.
His lips met yours softly, sweetly. It was easy to lose yourself in the feeling of Art’s mouth, in the gentle brushes of his lips against yours and the way he held your face so tenderly.
The feeling of his tongue pressing against the seam of your lips was strange, but you welcomed it, letting him lick into your mouth.
Each pass of his tongue against yours drew you deeper and deeper into it, into him. You moved into his lap without realizing it, kissing him with sweet, timid laps of your tongue.
Art pulled back first, his cheeks soft and pink and so pretty. “See? That’s how you’re supposed to kiss someone. That was really good.”
You laughed softly, and moved off of his lap sheepishly. Patrick leaned forward, brushing your hair back, holding your face in his hand.
“Okay, show me what Art showed you,” he instructed, then leaned in.
Kissing Patrick was different than kissing Art. He was hungrier, more insistent. His tongue pressed into your mouth like he wanted to chart every inch. You did your best to match what he offered, to kiss the way Art had just shown you, sweetly, like you really meant it.
And you did mean it. Patrick’s hands moved along your side, up until they cupped your tits through your shirt. You moaned softly into his mouth— the sound was muffled, met with a moan of his own. He gave an experimental squeeze of your tits and you whined softly. So he did it again, amused by the pretty, sweet noises you mewled out.
Patrick was getting hard, pressing against your thigh. It was a new sensation that you were hyper aware of as you unconsciously ground yourself against him.
You pulled back first, cheeks burning hot after you remembered Art was right beside you. You tucked unkempt hair behind your ear, smiled bashfully. “How was I?”
“Good,” Patrick said.
At the same time Art supplied, “So good.”
You laughed softly, shaking your head. “Okay. Cool.”
Art was squirming, fidgeting, holding a pillow over his lap. Patrick was less covert— opting to openly adjust himself, drawing more attention to the fact that he was hard. You rolled your eyes and stole the nearest cup you could find, sipping at watered down Mountain Dew.
“Do you want me to leave?” You teased, raising an eyebrow. Your teeth dug into the plastic straw as you looked between the two of them.
Art stammered, mortified, but Patrick just smiled dizzyingly over at you. “I can teach you something else. You got to first base, so why don’t you steal second?”
You rolled your eyes, but heat flared behind your cheeks. Jesus Christ, he was such a smug asshole. “I still don’t know what that means,” you said, feeling a little embarrassed.
He grinned and mimed jerking off. Your eyes widened, and you laughed softly. “That would be weird,” you said, half-believing it. “Like, if I did jerk one of you off, that leaves one of you just watching.”
You glanced at Art, who looked just as interested as Patrick did, and your heart stammered nervously. “What if I show you how you do it on Art? Look at him— he’s the perfect little practice dummy.” Patrick reached over, pinching at Art’s cheek until the blond kicked his shin.
“Show me?” You echoed. “Like… you’re going to do it to him, and I do it to you?”
Patrick nodded, leaning into Art’s side, his smarmy smile dissolved into something needier. Art swallowed hard, lips parted slightly as he looked over at Patrick.
Patrick’s lips met his slowly, hungrily. You watched wide eyed as Patrick deepened the kiss, as Art eagerly accepted the other boy’s tongue into his mouth.
Patrick threw the pillow out of Art’s lap and sent it careening into the desk on the opposite side of the room. Your eyes widened at the sight of Art, hard and tenting his boxers. Patrick palmed him in his large hands making the blonde whimper into his mouth and buck up, seeking friction.
You swallowed hard, biting down on the straw as you watched Patrick tug at the elastic of Art’s boxers. Art lifted his hips to allow Patrick to tug them down his thighs, just enough to expose his cock to both of you.
“See,” Patrick gasped, leaning back from their kiss. Art chased his lips fruitlessly, mouth ajar, waiting for more. “He’s so fucking easy. Come feel.”
You moved closer, looking at Art for permission. When he nodded, you reached out, letting your fingertips graze the soft skin of his shaft. He exhaled a shuddery breath, eyes fluttering shut. Patrick’s hand covered yours, guiding you to squeeze around his length.
He was warm under your touch, silky soft, pulsing in your grip. Your heart hammered just at that— at the feel of him in your hand. “Feels nice, huh? Knowing how much he wants you.” You nodded, then slid your fist up, testing the waters. Art moaned softly, throbbed in your grip, aching for more. Patrick smiled like the cat who got the cream. “Hands off, just watch me.”
Patrick spat into his hand and replaced your hand with his own. The second Patrick curled his fingers around Art and started stroking him slowly, the blond was mewling for more. “Fuck,” he moaned, his forehead knocking against Patrick’s, mouth open, panting. “That’s good, feels good.”
You watched Patrick rub his thumb over Art’s tip, eyes widening as Art really whimpered for it, hips thrusting up into Patrick’s fist, chasing more of the pleasure the brunet offered.
“You get it now?” Patrick asked. You nodded quickly, and he tugged down his own boxers. “Fuck, okay— fucking show me.”
Your heart hammered with nerves, but you nodded. You held your hand out and spit into it, mimicking what Patrick had done before you wrapped your hand around his cock.
He felt bigger in your hands, but you didn’t say that. One, you worried it might piss Art off, and two, he didn’t need the ego boost. And he was slick, beading precum at his tip so each pass of your hands felt slicker and slicker.
And you couldn’t help but want to be an asshole. “You’re wet like a girl,” you said with a smirk, gliding your thumb over his tip.
And he was shameless, nodding with a sly grin. “That means I like you.” He panted, moaning softly. “Besides, I bet your fucking panties aren’t dry right now.”
Well, fuck. You tried to ignore the rush of heat in your belly that those words caused, to focus only on the glide of your hand on Patrick’s cock— up and down, copying his pace on Art, copying the ways he’d squeeze and twist his hand.
Art was moaning, rutting up into the tight sheath of Patrick’s fist, the muscles of his abdomen tensing and relaxing in unsteady jerks beneath his soft skin.
“Fuck— switch, switch,” Patrick said quickly. Art whined when Patrick stopped touching him, but it was ignored. “Want you to feel it when he comes.”
He guided your hand back onto Art’s cock and nodded for you to move. “Fuck, your hand’s so soft,” Art groaned. “Faster, faster, fuck—“ He was practically begging. You swallowed, increased the pace, squeezed him a little tighter.
Art was touching Patrick— jerking him off while you brought him closer and closer to finishing. Patrick leaned in, kissed you deeply, pulled Art in too until the three of you were a mess of tongues and lips and spit and hands.
Art came first— coating your hand in warm, slick cum, throbbing in your grip. He was panting into your and Patrick’s mouths, moaning softly as you continued to slowly work him through it. Patrick came next, once Art redoubled his effort, focused on making Patrick add to the mess covering your hands.
Patrick was loud, pornographic, messy. Art brought a cum covered hand between his lips, cleaning it up. Your eyes widened.
“Art, c’mon, you’re scandalizing her,” Patrick said, like you weren’t even there.
“Shut up,” you said, shoving him. He laughed and pulled his boxers back up. Art followed suit, and the three of you were left gross and sweating in the heat. You wiped your hand off on one of their discarded shirts and gave a sheepish smile.
They sat there, expectantly. Waiting for you to make the next call. There was a level of want in you, need, but the thought of asking for them to take care of it was mortifying. “Do you want to watch a movie or something now?”
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gojonanami · 8 months
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IS IT OVER NOW? - SUGURU GETO (ft. SATORU GOJO)
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summary: suguru thinks the only way you'll leave him is if he lies to you about cheating on him - and it is. but turns out, you're not so easy to leave -- for him and his best friend. contents: 18+ only, smut, mentions of cheating, swearing, spoilers for vol. 0 + star plasma vessel and premature death arc, so much angst, but also too much smut (gotta earn that smut by getting through the angst), multiple orgasms, creampie, unprotected sex, fingering (f receiving), oral (f + m receiving), slight choking, panty play, overstimulation (f receiving) wc: 11,150 (why do i do this) playlist: is it over now - taylor swift, now that we don't talk - taylor swift, you are in love - taylor swift, say don't go - taylor swift
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“It’s over,” the words slipped out of his mouth like second nature, the same way “I love yous” left his lips with a smile against your neck, but now those same lips were in a tight line. His eyes once filled with mirth, now stared at you with nothing in them — nothing but empty truth. 
You don’t believe your ears — and how could you? The same man who laid with you on sleepless nights, in the silence of the way home after brutal losses, mornings spent in his wrinkled uniform white button up, stupid arguments ended in laughter, and the whispered promises kept like oaths in your hearts. 
But now, they were broken — broken like your heart was. 
“It’s over, I’m sorry — I can’t do this anymore,” and you’re stepping forward over this ravine with a snapping tightrope, but he’s on the other side with a lighter and a knife — daring you to cross it. Because he wouldn’t catch you — not anymore, “it’s not you—“ 
“Don’t give me bullshit assurances, Suguru,” you spit, the same name you had woken up this morning on your lips, all the love he had fostered over two and half years eroding away with his few words — slipping into hatred without another word, “give me a reason, I know Amanai and Haibara hurt you — hell, it hurt me too, but—“ 
“Don’t bring them up—“ he seethes, the same passion he once had for you — for even a scratch you had gotten from a mission that he promised to make a curse pay for again and again by making it serve him — now used for people who weren’t even here anymore, “it has nothing to do with them,” 
And you almost laugh. It had everything to do with them. You had watched him fall apart over this summer — scapegoat the summer heat to Satoru’s face, when it wasn’t the heat that was withering him to nothing — a wilting flower simmered under the heat of loss. And with no one who could reach him — because he wouldn’t let them. 
“You know that’s not true—” 
“I cheated on you,” and the words die on your lips — along with any hope you had, “it was a stupid mistake but it showed me we can’t keep doing this,” 
“You’re lying,” you denied it — no, no, no.  
“I’m not,” and you can’t make sense of it, sense of anything, images of him tangled with another assaulting your senses — assaulting your heart, your soul, your body — bile rising in your throat that seared you on the way down as you swallow, “I didn’t want to have to tell you, but if it’s the only way for you to accept this, so be it,” 
“Fuck off, you didn’t want to ‘have to tell me,’” hot, angry tears burning at your eyes, “fuck you,” 
“Sweet—“ 
“You don’t get to call me that,” you snarl, heart rattling your ribs, as if it was trying to break through its bony cage, as if puncturing itself on the shards of your bones would hurt less, “not unless you’re trying to fix this,” you bargain, bargain for a love that was already lost. 
“We can’t do this — I can’t do this to you,” and you give a watery chuckle, unable to meet his gaze; meet the gaze you once thought was your salvation — the thing you fought day in and day out to come home to, “I’m sorr—” 
“Don’t bother,” you bottle the sadness  in a barely kept shut box, shoved beneath your icy exterior, ice crawling over the recesses of your shattered soul, “don’t apologize for me for something you chose to do,” and you turn to walk away. 
“Where are you going?” 
And you give a terse chuckle, turning to look back, “you don’t get to care anymore, Geto.” 
~~~ 
It was necessary. It was necessary. It was necessary. 
That’s what Suguru keeps telling himself. He was caught in a tailspin, a tailspin that was only leading him one place, and he couldn’t take you with him. He couldn’t let that happen. But you keep haunting his thoughts, along with the other ghosts holed up in his head. 
He hasn’t seen you in weeks. Only sporadic updates from Shoko when she humored his questions with a bribe of free cigarettes — and he didn’t know what you had told her but he knew you hadn’t told her that he had cheated (because Shoko would have surely ignored him). Shoko had even snuck a picture of you. You had grown your hair out, eyes no longer full of the joy as it once had been, and a cigarette you had said you had sworn you would never smoke between your lips. 
And it only makes him want to pull the cigarette from your lips and kiss you again, swallow the smoke poisoning your lungs, hoping your lips would clear the poison from his system. But he couldn’t — he couldn’t go back now. Not when he couldn’t shake the darkness that crept over his soul — he couldn't go back to that spring, because those old days had died along with everyone else around him. Shot through the head just like Amanai. 
He stares at the picture and it only makes him more sure — he can’t be in your life. He can’t be yours, he can’t even be your friend — because he can’t pretend it’s just platonic — can’t pretend it means nothing — not when you can see right through him, see the light fading from inside him, and you’d try to save him. Because that’s what you do. So he pays the cost instead, the cost of losing you — of losing your smiles, your laughs, your tears, and your voice. 
And he didn’t even have his dignity — he had left that behind when he had lied to your face. Lied because he knew it was the only way you’d leave, and he couldn’t risk you staying. He couldn’t let your fingers dig into his sides, as he let himself drown, he couldn’t watch you choke on water along with him — no, no, it couldn’t happen. 
He had long drowned — on that beach in Okinawa. 
He got a phone call — Yaga — likely with another mission, and he only can think about Tsukomo’s words — over and over and over. He was treating the symptoms, eradicating curses day in and day out, he himself was a symptom of a broken system — a broken sorcerer. 
And he flips his phone open, staring at the screensaver of you and him, your sleepy smile as you look up at the camera nuzzled against his chest — filled with the same love in your eyes that he watched drain from your eyes when he fed you perfectly prepared lies. 
“Hello, yes, I’m available for a mission,” he hears Yaga give him the details of the mission on the other line, but it barely registers. 
But at least he wouldn’t break you too.  
~~~
You wake to a pounding at the door — the one time you had gotten time off, the one time you had taken the vacation you swore you would, the vacation that you would have your phone off, doors locked, no communication with anyone with Jujutsu Tech. 
And yet. 
There was someone banging on your door at 11:09 PM at night. 
You stare at your ceiling at the spinning fan above you, and you couldn’t imagine how this night could get any worse. You throw off your covers, only in sleep shorts and a t-shirt, grumbling as you meander your way to the door to find Satoru, standing at your doorstep. 
Your heart drops. 
“What— did—“ 
“Suguru defected,” and you stare at him, as if he’s speaking a foreign language — two words made no sense in that order, no, no — he wouldn’t do that. Suguru out of anyone wouldn’t do that.  
“No, that can’t—“ and Satoru comes inside, brushing past you, “Satoru—“ 
“It’s not just that,” he says softly, “he slaughtered a village, and his parents,” and you’re shaking your head, “why are you shaking your head—“ 
“What kind of weird prank is this, Satoru— he wouldn’t—“ and your voice dies in his throat as you see the look on his face, and all other words fade away from your lips except one —  “why?” 
And he explains — tells you what Suguru had told him, what had happened, why he left — “I couldn’t bring myself to kill him,” he murmurs, shaking his head, “I should have — if I had done what he did, Suguru wouldn’t have hesitated—“ 
“He wouldn’t have been able to do that to you, Satoru,” you scoff, leaning against your couch, Satoru sat beside you, “you’re the most important person to him, he wouldn’t have been able to even fathom the idea of hurting you. He would have just tried to convince you to change your mind,” 
He gives a bitter chuckle, “Well then, he would have been able to change my mind all the same,” he’s holding his face, as if it would keep himself from falling to pieces — but his hands are too late — you can see the broken pieces of what was Satoru Gojo in front of you. 
“Satoru, you can’t put Suguru upon yourself to save — he made the choices he made, you can’t change them. You can’t fix a person who doesn’t want to be fixed,” and maybe you were projecting — but you swore you saw the same pain, the same pain the day he broken your heart in Satoru’s eyes, “Suguru is smart enough to know where this road is leading—” 
“And why can’t I completely blame him for choosing it?” he murmurs, his cerulean eyes finally meeting yours over the rim of his sunglasses, “I understand how he feels — so do you, you’ve seen the broken system, the deaths that could have been prevented—” 
“But is this the way to fix it with innocent peoples’ blood on our hands?” you whisper, almost afraid to hear his answer, “I have friends who aren’t sorcerers — would he have me slaughter them too?” 
“Well, he killed his own parents, so I wouldn’t doubt that,” he shakes his head, “Suguru was never the type to do things half-heartedly,” and his gaze falls again to the floor, “do you know after I had retrieved Amanai’s body — I asked Suguru if we should kill all of those people in the Star Religious Group?” 
“Satoru—” 
“He said there would be no point in it — no reason,” and he’s licking his lips, pulling his glasses off, “but he found his reason now, didn’t he?” 
“Satoru, you had just come off Amanai, almost dying, you had barely a moment to process—” 
“Why did he tell me to stop? Why did he save me when he couldn’t do himself the same courtesy?” And he’s rising to his feet, pacing the room, unable to sit still, “I thought I’d come here and talk to you because who else could understand him more than me? Shoko maybe, but even she doesn’t know,” his fists are clenched at his sides, as he whirls to face you again, “Why? I don’t understand how a person can change so much — how can you go from protecting the weak to—” 
“Satoru, I don’t know why Suguru does the things he does—did you forget? He broke up with me,” the words reopen old wounds you thought had long scarred over, flesh wounds that had ripped you open, but had closed back up, now bleeding like new, “and he cheated on me,” and walked away without another word — twisting the knife with his silence. 
Satoru’s brows knit together, his mouth opening as if to dispute it, but closing again — because if Suguru could murder his own parents, why wouldn’t he cheat on his girlfriend? 
“I’m sorry—” and you laugh bitterly, meeting his gaze. 
“I think we have bigger problems than his unfaithfulness,” and he says nothing, “what are we going to do about him?” 
“Nothing—” 
You stare at him, lips parted, “Satoru—” 
“I can’t kill him,” his voice breaks, and it breaks you too,  “I couldn’t bear it. I can’t be the one to—” 
“But you’re the only one who can—” and you swallow the lump in your throat — how could you tell him to kill Suguru when you couldn’t imagine doing it either? “then what do we do?” 
“Nothing, for now,” he murmurs, running his fingers through his hair, “I’ll monitor his moves as best I can, he’s good at covering his tracks — he knows how I operate more than anyone else does,” he says softly, “but not many can hide from the six eyes,” 
“And you know how he does things too, Satoru,” you find your way his side, your fingers finding his, “it will take time for Suguru to make large moves — especially if he has two young children with him right now,” your heart aches at the thought — he promised to marry you one day, promised you a family once you both had settled down enough to consider it, and now he had two kids. But you weren’t with him. 
His eyes find yours, “i’m sorry about what happened — I wasn’t there — I haven’t been here, at all—” 
“You don’t have to apologize for that, Satoru,” and he’s shaking his head. 
“Maybe I could have—” 
“You can’t fix the whole world, Satoru,” you whisper gently, “you’re the strongest, yes, but that doesn't mean you can be everywhere and do everything,” 
“I should have been here,” and you’re shaking your head, “I could’ve—” 
“You couldn’t have, do you know how stubborn Suguru is? We couldn’t even convince him to cut his hair, much less change his mind about committing mass murder,” and he sighs, his eyes falling and rising to yours again, “hey, you’re okay, you know. You do too much, honestly, everything you’ve done — everything you will do—” 
“And yet it will never feel like enough,” and you feel as if you could hear the same words leaving Suguru’s mouth too — the two had more in common than they had cared to admit. 
“You are enough,” and your fingers find his cheek, “just as Satoru, you are,” 
And his arms are pulling you into a hug then, head buried in your shoulder, his body consuming you with its warmth, your fingers running through his snowy locks, his tears wetting your shirt, but you say nothing, only holding him.
He pulls back after a few minutes, but his arms still wrapped around you, as he stares at you, barely any evidence of his tears, except for the redness on the tip of his nose, “You’re enough too,” 
“I don’t know about that,” you joke, and he’s cutting you off with sharp words and a sharper look. 
“You are, sweetheart,” and the familiar pet name makes your heart ache, “you’re more than enough,” and his palm is resting against his cheek, thumb rubbing the length of your cheek, “you’re so much more than you even know,” 
And your breath catches as he draws near, “Satoru—” you shouldn’t. He shouldn’t. It wasn’t right. But why did his hands feel so nice against your cheeks? Why were you melting into his touch? Why didn’t you pull away? 
“I just want to feel something else,” his hand is sliding into your hair, fingers pressed against your neck, “don’t you?” 
And your lips find his first, lips brushing at first — and he’s so soft, his breath catching when you do, your fingers against his cheeks, and he’s pulling you back in again — it’s gravity. Again and again your lips meet, less hesitant with each kiss and each touch. 
This shouldn’t be happening. You needed to stop it — Suguru had always teased that his best friend had a thing for you — hell, Satoru had all but admitted it with teasing words and promises to steal you away if Suguru ever had fumbled your relationship. But you knew he’d never would do it. 
Or you thought he never would do it. 
His hands slide down your body, pulling your hips closer to his, “tell me stop, if you want me to,” he murmurs, fingers toying with the hem of your shirt, “I want—” 
And you’re kissing him again, pulling him along your living room to your bedroom, “I don’t want to stop,” you breathe, you want something else, you want Suguru’s touch cleansed from your body, you want something more — you want to be wanted.
It had been so long since you had been wanted. The last few months with Suguru felt like an exercise in futility. You barely saw him, much less touched him — mission after mission, and excuse after excuse, piled onto the pyre waiting to burn your love for him alive. How long had it been since you had even kissed him? Each time you tried would end in him pulling away, shaking his head and telling you he was tired. 
And he was. He was tired — tired of his work, tired of jujutsu society, and tired of you. 
But he didn’t have the courtesy to let you know. 
But Satoru…
His fingers are quick to get you naked, deftly pulling your t-shirt over your head, as your fingers tug his jacket off with the same eagerness, “Eager, are we?” he murmurs, half hearted teasing, a ghost of a smile on his lips as you pout, “don’t worry, I am too, baby,” as your fingers tug his sunglasses off, and place them on your nightstand. 
You roll your eyes, “Satoru—” and he’s swallowing your retort with his lips — and you can’t help but compare them in your mind, he was so much more aggressive than Suguru was. Suguru’s hands slid over your hips and thighs as if he had all the time in the world, while Satoru’s clung to you desperately, as if you’d dissipate under his fingertips, “should we be doing this? Suguru—“ 
“Cheated. Murdered. Left us,” And his lips slide from his lips to your jaw, before his teeth graze right under your jaw, drawing a gasp from your lips.
And his lips curl, “Such a pretty noise, just f’me,” and he’s biting and sucking, surely leaving a lovely mark against your skin, his tongue tracing over the mark, “did you make noises like that for Suguru?” 
“Satoru—” and his fingers are tugging at your bra, teasing your erect nipples as he’s only tugging the garment down, “fuck—” and his lips kiss your tit, while he’s rolling the other nipple between his thumb and forefinger, “please,” 
“Did you beg him like that too?” his fingers pull at the waistband of your shorts, teasing the skin underneath, “no wonder Suguru kept you for yourself,” he’s tugging off your shorts down your legs. 
“Can we not talk about him if we aren’t gonna talk—” and his lips find yours again, teeth baring down on your bottom lip, “Satoru—” you gasp as he pulls at your lip, thumb sliding over the kiss bitten flesh. 
“How can we not?” he murmurs, as his hands slide up your thighs to squeeze your ass, “is this the bed he fucked you on? Is this the way he touched you?” and he’s parting your thighs, large palms holding you apart, as his half lidded eyes linger on the wet patch on your panties, “is this how wet you got for him? Am I special?” 
“Oh, fuck off—” and your words fall away as his finger presses against the wet patch, thumb against your puffy clit while his fingers tease your aching cunt. 
“What was that, baby?” and he’s grinning, and he spares you, dragging your ruined underwear down, and he’s leaning down to your sopping pussy only to press teasing kisses to your inner thigh, before his lips press against your clit, “so fucking wet,” and he inhales, a languid moan leaving his lips, “if you taste as good as you smell, I’ll be cumming in my pants before I even fuck your pretty cunt,” 
And his fingers sink into you — two at once, making your lips part, teasing your pussy open, the lewd sounds fill your ears as your slick squelches against his fingers, “Hear that? Such a greedy cunt, swallowing my fingers up even when I try to pull out,” and he’s pumping faster now, fingers curling against your walls, making you moan far too loudly, “moaning like that, and I’ve barely even started,” he hums, before his breath is warming your slick cunt as a warning as his tongue begins to lap at your clit, again and again. 
“Fuck, Toru, need more—” His other hand is only grabbing you, pulling you impossibly closer as a third finger finds its way into you, and your hips move against his touch, begging him to fuck you in earnest. But he’s unrelenting. You can hear him swallow around you, every flutter of your cunt made just for him, as he nearly growls against you, vibrations only making you nearly grind yourself against his fingers and mouth.  His tongue circles your clit, toying with it, before his lips close over it and suck, nearly making you scream, “I’m cummin—” 
And his fingers finally find the spot they had been looking for, again and again with deft precision, as your walls clench around his fingers, as you gasp, arching your back, as you cum, and he’s licking your essence up eagerly. 
Grinning as he pulls his fingers from you, licking your cum from his digits, before lapping at your leaking cunt, making you twitch around nothing, “Fuck, needy pussy practically begging me to fill you, huh? Hehehe,” he’s looking up at you all fucked out, your thighs twitching, eyes blown out — meanwhile his lips, chin, and nose were painted in your essence, the most beautiful work of art you’d ever seen, “didn’t realize how much I wanted this,” and he’s licking up your cum off his face, and wiping the rest on the back of his hand, and he’s climbing back over you, dragging his clothed bulge over your still sensitive cunt, making you both groan, “and I guess neither did you,” 
You’re still looking up at him with lust filled eyes, as your fingers find his cheeks, “aren’t you wearing far too many clothes still?” and he’s smiling, “wanna help me out with that, sweetheart?” he asks, as his fingers press your boobs together, thumbs flicking against the abused nipples, cock twitching against your cunt as if he was imaging what it would feel like to blow his load right between them, his warm cum all over your face— 
And you’re flipping him in a moment, pinned underneath you, as your fingers undo each button of his now definitely creased white button up, damp with your cum, as your palms drag over the exposed skin of his chest and abs, “Can’t wait to fuck myself on this later,” you murmur, leaning down to drag your tongue up his stomach, making him gasp deliciously, before your fingers busy themselves with undoing his belt, the click of the buckle only making you ache more, as you undo the zipper of his pants, tugging his boxers along with them to bunch at his feet hanging off your too small of a bed, and you can’t stop the gasp that leaves your lips. 
He’s so fucking big. 
Suguru was big, so fucking big that the first time he fucked you, he couldn’t even fit in your tight cunt. He had to give you multiple orgasms, prep you right, stretching you out with his fingers and tongue, and even a dildo, until you could fit himself with lube. And Satoru definitely wasn’t as thick as Suguru, but he made up for that in length — fuck, how deep would that reach? A pretty curve at the end with lovely veins running up that made your mouth water, white pubes dotting along it that were shaved, but grown out — likely from being away on missions for so long. 
“You can take a picture, it’d last longer,” and your eyes snap up to the smirk on his lips, “although I tend to last very long,” he’s shrugging out of his shirt and kicking off his pants, before he’s pinning you under him again, “and if you do, maybe I can take a picture of you, full of my cum, my cock fucking it back in — it’s only fair, right, pretty?” and you shiver, as his finally unclothed cock bumps against your cunt, “oh, you’d like that wouldn’t you? I’ll make it my screensaver, you’d like wouldn’t you, filthy girl?” 
And your fingers wrap around his cock, finally making him shut up with a hiss, “Gonna talk all night, or you gonna fuck me, Toru?” and he barks out a laugh, but it's consumed by a moan as you stroke him, leaning up to kiss along his jaw, “you gonna fuck the same hole your best friend did? Gonna cum there too?” and he’s thickly swallowing, your words leaving the great Satoru Gojo speechless, “what? If you brought up Suguru, so can I, right? Only fair,” you echo his words, and you’re squeezing around the base of him, “well, are you—” 
And he’s pulling your hand away, teasing your dripping entrance with the tip of his cock, dragging his pre-cum over your cunt, letting your cum mix together, “Fuuuuuck, baby, so fuckin’ gorgeous,” and he’s manhandling you, grabbing your thighs, and hooking your ankles over his shoulders, “gonna fuck you now, sweetheart, any complaints?” 
He grins at the way you shake your head eagerly, hips nearly grinding against his cock, and his tip sinks past your walls, “so tight, baby, did Suguru not fuck you right?” You can’t manage a reply, as you grasp at his shoulders, pulling him closer, as he sinks into you inch by inch, his brow furrowed beautifully as he finally bottoms out with a groan, “s’good f’me, so perfect—“ your walls flutter around him, your slick soaking him, and he’s tilting your head by your chin to make you look at where he’s sunk into you. 
And he’s pulling out before sinking back in, and you’re gasping and squeezing him — how was he possibly deeper? “Fuck, baby, your cunt is trying snap me half,” and his hips are slapping against you as he fucks you in earnest, the squeaks of your mattress as he thrusts in and out and the lewd squelch of your pussy as it wraps around every inch and vein of his cock, “that’s it, that’s it, take me, take every inch of me,” and his balls are slapping against your ass, “did you take Suguru this well? Did you ever take anyone this well?”
And you’re a mess of just moans as he’s fucking you again and again, as he cups your chin, “I didn’t hear an answer or did the I fuck the words out of you too, baby?” He’s kissing you again, swallowing your noises with lips curled, before he’s pulling away with a groan, “can’t hear myself think with how loud you are — so fucking wet,” 
“S’close, Toru, I-“ and he’s grunting, nodding, as he watches you, his cerulean eyes stare at you, right as his tip brushes your cervix— 
“Cum for me baby, let me watch you cum around my cock,” and his fingers reach down between the two of you and rub against your clit, making your eyes roll back, as you fall apart around him. 
Your walls are fluttering around him as you cum, moaning his name on your lips, as he pistons in and out again and again, thrusts stuttering as your walls squeeze him tight, “baby, I’m gonna cum, where do you want me—“ 
“Inside—please need to feel you cum—“ and you’re moaning, pulling him impossibly closer, and he’s sinks deep into you, and cums. He’s spurting his thick load into you, fucking it into you deeper and deeper, until you’re so full of him and his cum, you can barely feel anything else. 
He’s slipping your legs off his shoulders, before collapsing on top of you, sinking into your arms. He’s pulling out, watching your mixed releases slip out of you with a groan, “how are you so fucking perfect?” He’s finding your lips in a kiss, before his nose nuzzles your neck, as your highs wear down. 
Your fingers run through his white strands, “shouldn’t I be asking you that?” And he laughs, settling on your chest.  And for a moment you forget — you forget the nights you spent with Suguru in this bed, the nights spent in tangled sheets with whispered nothings, with his arms around you, just like Satoru’s were now. 
But only for a moment. 
And as Satoru’s soft snores filled your ears, the only thing on your mind was the one person who you wanted in your bed right now. 
~~~ 
“Still asleep?” your fingers run through his hair, “such a lazy-bones on your days off,” and your lips trace over his jaw, making his lips curl despite the draw of sleep, “gonna leave me hanging after last night?” 
And your lips find his, sliding over his with practiced ease, the same way you breathed — it was natural, as his fingers find purchase in your hair, sliding back to your neck. Again and again, your lips cannot part his, if you can’t breathe without him — cannot exist without his touch. 
And when you do part, he’s smiling, black fringe falling in his eyes, “So needy in the morning,” Suguru’s voice is gravelly with sleep, even as your fingers card through his black locks, “when did you become such an early riser? Usually I’m the one dragging you out of this bed kicking and screaming,” 
Usually, but he’s the one who's struggling out of bed these days. He’s struggling to even function — lifting his arms in the shower feels like too much effort — and what’s the point? Would anything change if he left his bed today? Couldn’t he escape into the recesses of his unconscious for the rest of the day? 
But you’re here — and you’re leaning over him, your lips curled in that smile that damned him into submission, because what could he do except submit to you — “who said anything about leaving this bed?” 
But he needed to leave this bed, he thought, as your lips found his again — and how did you always taste so sweet? — he needed to leave these warm covers and inviting embrace. Because he couldn’t stay here. 
He couldn’t stay with you.
But then your lips find his, and he can’t bring himself to stop, not when you’re climbing on top of him, straddling his waist, his growing bulge tenting in his boxers. He can he stop when you’re murmuring his name like that, eager fingers tugging the damp fabric down, letting his dick slap against his stomach — a bead of precum that you lean down, your tongue darting out to taste. 
And he hisses, as your fingers wrap around him, teasing the head of his cock, thumb dragging over the slit, “sweetheart—“ he's warning — but you know he’s all bark and no bite — but he would be biting you later surely, with the way you toy with him — both his cock and his feelings. 
Your mere presence in his bed has him questioning himself — questioning how necessary is it to end things? Why does he need to? He had this future planned — a certain way things were to go — he was the strongest, him and Satoru, he was going to work and settle down later, marry you, maybe even a kid or two — but now — the plans had changed. 
He had changed. 
Satoru was the strongest. Not him. And work as a sorcerer was killing him now, as you and Satoru were sent farther and further away, and Shoko had resigned herself to medicine — what did he have? Another year of this hell — he didn’t even know if he could last another day of swallowing curses. It had become second nature to him, but without a purpose, without a reason without any principles to guide him — it became worse than torture. 
It was his personal hell. 
And yet, as your soft lips closed around his leaking tip, fingers playing with his balls, as you sank your mouth onto him, drawing soft moans from his lips — he didn’t wanna give it up. How could he, when you were here? He could burn his life down to ash, watch what he worked for, what he had thought was his purpose fall to pieces in front of him — let himself fall to pieces — but that would mean burning you along with it. 
And could he bear that? 
Your tongue flicked against his length, tracing his veins as his tip hit the back of your throat, making you gag around him, as his fingers settled in your hair, “fuck, sweetheart, s’fucking good f’me,” and his hips shallowly thrust into your mouth, “take me so well, practically swallowing my dick,” and you swallow around him, pulling a moan from his mouth, his eyes flitting down to see the telltale press of your thighs together, “such a filthy girl, look at you, probably dripping wet from sucking me off,” 
And he’s tugging you off, strings of spit and his precum connecting your lips to his aching dick, “Sugu—“ your lips are red and puffy, parted still, with cum and spit slipping down the corner of your mouth. 
And he’s pulling you on top of him, fingers pressing into the soft flesh of your thighs, hissing as the damp fabric of your far too thin sleep shorts press against his still sensitive cock, “don’t even have to get you ready baby, already all prepped from just tasting me, aren’t you?” 
He shouldn’t be doing this — he told himself today would be the day, he promised himself he’d stop pretending everything was fine. But when you felt so perfect on him — soft skin and soft sighs, your little gasp you gave when his fingers slide his t-shirt — the one full of small holes you had stolen from him when you first spent the night that you refused to throw out — up and over your head, exposing your chest to him — how can he stop? 
“Suguru, please,” you whimpered as his mouth took one nipple in his mouth, warm tongue flicking against the pebbled flesh before his teeth graze it, pulling another hallowed moan from your lips, “need you,” 
“Do you?” He hums, half teasing, half truthful — did you need him? Would you fall apart when he left? Would he spend nights wondering if you were anxious without him? Spend days wondering how you were filling them without him? 
And you pause, strange look on your face, as your eyes scan over his features, palm sliding over his face, “of course I do,” passion falls away for a moment replaced with a different intimacy, “you’re my best friend,” and your lips slide over his as you lean down, “I’ll always need you, even when we’re both dust — I hope we spend it bathed in sunshine together,” 
But would you? His eyes can’t meet yours — because he can’t see the sun in his future, only a dark descent into madness — a future spent alone. Because even with your smile at the end of his days, he couldn’t imagine spending another minute doing thankless work for miserable, ignorant, weak monkeys, only to do it all over again the next day. And his silence has you questioning him, but it’s like water fills his lungs, paralyzed by his own thoughts, and even as concern fills your eyes, he still can’t find anything to say. 
So you say it instead. 
“C’me here,” you murmur, and your hands slide over him, “I love you,” you kiss him all over his face — his nose, his cheeks, his chin, his forehead, before your lips hover before his, “can I—“ 
And he’s flipping you under him, pressing bruising kisses to your lips, as his fingers snake between your thighs, “you don’t need to ask— you never need to ask me,” he whispers in the dark, but even so, he knows — it can’t stay like this — even as he pulls your shorts down to bunch around your ankles and presses his leaking tip your messy folds — it can’t — because you were meant to live in the sunshine. 
And he hilts himself in you fully, inch by inch, until he’s groaning your name in a grunt — and he belonged in the dark silence. 
He knows this would be the last time. It would be. Because he had to — he couldn’t wait. It was only a waiting game until he was called to another mission, time until he dragged himself lower — until he couldn’t blame the heat for his dark bags under his eyes and the lost weight. 
He had to. 
And as he fucks you to your orgasm, instead of your lips moaning his name, your hard eyes meet his, lips parting, “I hate you—“ and his hands curl around your neck, “I hate lying traitors,” you choke out as his fingers squeeze your neck. 
SNAP. 
And he jolts awake, as whispers fill his ears, as his heartbeat slows, “Master Geto?” His eyes flicker over, spotting Nanako and Mimiko trying to snap a chocolate bar in half, “can you help us?” 
A dream. It was a dream. 
And he’s helping the girls, as they curl up beside him, “are you okay, Master Geto? You were talking in your sleep,” Nanako asks, ever curious, “you looked like you were having a bad dream,” 
“I was,” he admits, eyes fixed downward, trying to force the image of you choking below him from his eyes, “about someone I used to know,” 
“Who?” Mimiko pipes up, nibbling on her chocolate, and he sighs, running his hands through their hair, a bittersweet smile on his lips — he could still feel your lips against his, the smell of your sweat, the feel of your body. 
“Someone I loved — who I left, but I guess…I guess I miss them,” why was he spilling his guts to these two little girls? Ones who had been through far too much to hear about his petty problems. 
“Then why don’t you talk to them?” Nanako asks, “maybe you can tell them to live with us,” and his lips curl sadly. 
“I don’t think she would want to talk to me,” and why would you? After what he had said, what he had done, and what he was going to do. 
“You can try,” Mimiko says, she bites a chunk out of her share of the chocolate bar, “you tried to save us and you did — maybe you can do the same thing — save her,” 
And he considers it — maybe he didn’t have to drag you down. Maybe he wouldn’t be — maybe he’d be saving you. Saving you from a system that would only land you in a pile of bodies — just like Riko, just like Haibara. 
Maybe — maybe he could. Maybe he could be enough for you. Enough for you to leave. Enough for you to stay. He could have his family — and have you too. 
~~~~ 
He still had your key. 
You hadn’t bothered to ask for it back — maybe you had forgotten, maybe you didn’t care — but a part of him hoped it was for another reason, maybe you wanted him to come back. 
Even so, he didn’t know if it would still work — maybe you had the foresight to change the locks — but it does, sliding into the lock with ease, as the tumblers slide into place and he’s turning the knob into a silent apartment. And it plants a stubborn seed of hope in his chest, maybe it wasn’t so crazy — aside from breaking and entering — maybe he would find his way back to you. 
You’re likely on your walk this morning still — the same way you started the weekend, a walk and visit to your local coffee shop where you got the same order each time, and then you’d spend an hour browsing the shops for something to read or make. He scans the apartment — he knows you’re on vacation this week, from what Shoko had told him last, before he had spoken to Satoru. You hadn’t heard of his news, but you probably did now — if Shoko hadn’t told you, he knew Satoru would have. 
And he wonders how that conversation went. Wondered how angry you were. Wondered how much you must hate him now — maybe you even wanted to kill him. But the logical side of him knew you didn’t have the skill to do so — you were a grade 1 — a cut above the rest, but still, your abilities weren’t enough, but emotionally…he may let you kill him, if only to spare him the agony of having to kill you — but he knew it’d kill you just the same. 
He can see his days spent here before — you had finally moved off campus, convincing Yaga to let you have your own place early before graduation. You two had celebrated being free of dorm rooms with far too little space and too thin walls (too many times Satoru had spoiled the moment by either banging on the wall, blasting polka music, or just with smug remarks about yours and Suguru’s lack of sleep). He sees himself sitting at the kitchen counter, your stools pressed close as the two of you read the paper together, or laughed about something Shoko had texted or something stupid Gojo had done to piss off Yaga over burnt toast you had only burned while he’s pressing his lips to you. Or evenings spent on the couch cuddling while a bad movie he had picked played, but he’s more preoccupied with teasing you with brushes of his fingers against your bare skin or burying his face in the crook of your neck. And nights spent in your bed, entangled together, his arms around you listening to you breathe, skin dappled in the moonlight that streamed in from the window, wondering how did you ever exist at the same time as him? 
And then the front door swings open, as he steps out from the bedroom, and he hears a bag slip falling to the floor, groceries spilling out, and his gaze finds yours, “What—” 
“I came to see you,” he moves closer, and you step back — and he’s stopping, he doesn’t see fear in your eyes, he sees hurt — and he almost thinks maybe fear would pain him less. 
“Well, I’m here,” you cross your arms, unable to quite meet his eyes, “anything else?” 
“Sweetheart—” 
“You don’t get to call me that, Geto,” your words were sharp as a knife, and you were trying to cut — and you did, deep. He bites back the sting, as he stares at you — your hair was longer, your eyes had bags, but your lips were twisted with pain, when normally it’d be quirked in a smile pressed against his cheek, “what do you want? Unless I should just save myself the trouble and call Satoru or Yaga?” 
“I came to get you,” he steps forward slowly, and you don’t move away this time, “let’s be together. I—” 
“You murdered people, you murdered your parents, you left Jujutsu Tech, you broke my heart, you broke Satoru’s and Shoko’s  — and you want me to come with you?” you shake your head, barking out a harsh laugh, “did you lose your grip on reality between all the damage you’ve caused? 
“If you let me explain—” 
“And why should I let you? Your silence these past months was enough for me, you not fighting for us was enough for me, you spiraling without letting me help you was enough for me,” and your voice breaks, “and you cheating on me was enough for me, enough for me to know it’s over.” 
“It’s not over, it’s not. I tried to force it to be over. I lied to you, I lied to myself, and said it was over, but it’s not, it’s not,” and he’s so close in a moment, and he can smell the familiar scent of your perfume mixed with your sweat — lavender, hibiscus, and something all the more sweeter, “not when it’s us,” and his fingers brush against your cheek, “please—” 
“Don’t do this,” you’re shaking your head, again and again, “don’t, don’t, don’t, please—” 
“How can I not? How can I not when I was foolish enough not to the first time, pretty?” he’s murmuring, “I love you, I do, I never stopped,” 
“No, you don’t—” 
“I do, I do, I know I said a lot of things, I need you to know, I need to explain, if you just let me—” and his fingers are sliding along your jaw, and finds uneven skin, and his eyes lingers, as his fingers tilt your chin up to find a fresh hickey left underneath.
“I—” and he’s drawing you close, so close, his dark eyes narrowed to slits, a deadly silence that makes your skin prickle under his gaze, until he’s warming your lips with his breath. 
“Tell me to stop and I will,” but the telltale sign of your breath catching, your chest heaving against his, your lips parted as your eyes can’t pull away from him, his grip is slack enough for you to pull away — but you don’t. 
You can’t. 
And his lips hover before yours, warming your own with his heated breath, “Kiss me, baby,” and your cheeks warm, butterflies erupting in your stomach, heat blooming wherever his other hand sneaks, dragging over your sides. 
“Why should I?” you’re grumbling, but you’re staying right where he has you — right in his arms, and you don’t know why, “you want to kiss me so bad so you do it,” 
And he clicks his tongue, fingers sliding behind your head, weaving into your hair and against the soft skin of the back of your neck, tugging you closer, “you kissed someone else with those lips, tasted them, maybe a day or two — were you this bratty with them?” 
“Oh fuck off, Suguru, you’re one to talk—“ and his lips swallow your bitter words, tasting them on your tongue, as he parts your lips with a rough squeeze of your hips. And his lips only quirk when your moan rumbles against him, his calloused palms sliding between your thighs. 
“You open your legs this easy for them?” he says when he’s pulling away from your mouth, thumb dragging over your swollen spit soaked lips, “how’s that fair? I’m your first, baby, and I’ll always be your favorite—“ 
And any retort is lost as his teeth drag over your jaw, lips closing right over the hickey he had hated so much, normally calm eyes filled with dark contempt, and he’s biting down, pinching your already bruised skin between his teeth, sucking and soothing with his tongue, “Mine, isn’t that right, sweetheart?” 
You nod wordlessly, and his fingers slide forward, wrapping around the front of your neck, thumbing the hollow of your throat, “Use your words,” and there was something darker — something he had let you have glimpses of in moments of missions, of arguments, even in bed — but it wasn’t a glimpse now — it was the whole goddamn picture above you. 
“I’m yours, Suguru,” you manage, words strangled by a moan as his lithe fingers tug at the waistband of your panties, making them rub against your drenched cunt, “please—” 
“So pliant now, aren’t you?” he hums, as he pulls harder, making the wet fabric rub against your aching clit, “maybe I should make you cum this way, don’t know if you deserve my fingers or my mouth yet,” 
You’re a mess — mind swimming in the need for pleasure, why did it always feel so right with him? So perfect. It shouldn’t be. He cheated on you. He slaughtered humans. He left you. He left you without telling you anything of what was plaguing him, until it was too late. 
It was too late. He was too late. 
So why were you letting his hands tear your panties apart as he fucked you with them? 
Because — your fingers reach for his cheeks, leaning up to kiss him, again and again, as your lips parted and met — it was Suguru. 
It was always Suguru. 
“Please, Suguru, I need you, need more—ngh—” and the fabric of your panties snaps under his fingers, as he’s ripped them off, pocketing them without another word. 
“Did you let him touch you?” he’s kissing down your body, wet kisses, his lips lingering at your pebbled nipples, sucking one, while squeezing the other between his thumb and forefinger, before he switches, kissing down your stomach — tongue teasing your belly button — before he’s finally settling between your thighs, his fringe unrulier than ever, strands of his long hair slipping from his bun, “Answer me, sweetheart,” he orders, as he presses mean fingers to part your thighs for him, surely leaving bruises with how hard he’s holding your soft flesh. 
“I did,” you can’t manage the words to tell him who — how can you tell him his best friend fucked you? That you let Satoru fuck you the night you found out he left. It was one thing for him to cheat with a random person, it’s another for you to go and sleep with his best friend, “Suguru, please—” 
“Mouth or fingers?” and you swear, despite them not speaking, they still share the same dumbass brain cell— 
“What the fuck does it matte—” and your words are cut off by Suguru slipping in two fingers at once into your leaking cunt, fucking you meanly as he watched your mouth fall open, head tilted back as your hips jerked against him, desperate for more. His fingers curled as they fucked your hole open with rapid thrusts, the squelch of your cunt going straight to your head and straight to his already hard cock. 
“It fucking matters because this is my pussy, isn’t it, baby? I fucked it first, I fucked it best, and I need to know what others did while I was gone, don’t I?” and a third joins the other two, pulling another moan from your lips,“but if you won’t tell me, I’ll just use both, fuck you with all five fingers and tongue if that’s what you want to do,” 
“Sugu—” you’re already so fuckin’ close, your walls shuddering around his cock, “I’m—“ and he stops moving, smiling down at your open mouth twisting in a scowl, “fuck—“ 
“That’s what we’re trying to do, baby, but I’m not gonna let you cum that easy,” he coos, his curled lips leaning down to lap at your cunt, warm tongue dragging up your clit, before sucking lightly, making you squirm, “tell me you want me,” 
“Your fucking ego—“ and he’s plunging three fingers into your messy entrance, making you gasp — god, you hated how good he felt — his fingers bullying your insides with practiced ease, “Sugu— please—“ as his tongue teases your clit, flicking it, before his teeth nibble at it. You’re squirming in earnest now, nearly fucking yourself on his fingers and tongue. 
He laughs, pulling his mouth from your cunt, lips glossy with your pre-cum,“How quick you’re going from cussing me out to begging me to cum,” you don’t care anymore — you need to cum, “tell me what you want, Princess,” 
“Need to cum, please, please, Sugu—ah—“ and he’s sinking one more finger in you, before his lips close around your clit and suck, hard. Your back arches as something in you snaps, as the squelching and slurping of his fingers and sucking send you over the edge. You flood his mouth and fingers with your cum, squirting all over him, as he eats you out and fucks you through your orgasm, groaning as you clench around his tongue and fingers. Your thighs shake and quiver in his grip, fingers holding you still in place, as he keeps overstimulating you, “too much, can’t—“ you cry out, shaking your head, but he’s not relenting until you feel something build in again — more and more, until his fingers find that one spot in you that has you silently screaming as you cum again, even harder than the first. You’re soaked — soaked the sheets through, chest rising and falling as the pleasure ebbs away, tears slipping down your cheeks, folds fluttering as he pulls his fingers out. 
His breath warms your dripping cunt, lips glossy and eyes dark, groaning as he watches your cum slip from inside you,  as he looks up at you with a dark, half lidded gaze, “So fucking good for me, even hotter when you cry,” he’s licking his lips clean of your cum, before he’s pressing the pads of his fingers into your open mouth, “clean them f’me, baby,” and your tongue swirls around him obediently without question, pretty eyes glassy with tears making his rock hard cock twitch in his pants, “good girl,” 
And he’s pulling his fingers from your mouth, before leaning up and pulling off his black sweater, the click of his belt as he kicks off his pants, your eyes glued to his thick cock — he was thicker than Satoru, so pretty too — black pubes groomed, nearly pressed against his stomach. 
“Always so desperate for my cock, aren’t you, Princess? I’ll let you clean your cum off of it after, but I have to have you first — got to reclaim what’s mine,” and he’s dragging his cock against your clit. 
You gasp, twitching against him, but more than the pleasure, the guilt creeps in — flashes of Satoru from the night before with hands over your hips and thighs, and you had kept quiet about your life from the time you spent away. You had done your best to stay away from Suguru, even though you knew he hadn’t exactly done the same — asking Shoko questions, for pictures, for any scrap of you. 
And you couldn’t lie — not about this. 
“Suguru,” and he’s pausing, eyes meeting yours with a flash of concern, but the words tumble out with warning, just the way he had done with you, “I slept with Satoru,” 
And he’s silent — emotions roll in and out on his face — confusion, hurt, anger, and acceptance — they all fall away as he’s only staring off to the side, unable to even look at you. Words fall away, stopped in your mouth after the bitter truth that’s left it and you wonder — is it over now? Seconds feel like hours — your fingers curl into the sheets, looking for something to hang onto, to ground you. Why did he have to start this? You were fine with the burnt ashes of the love he had scorched over, but now he started a fire, and you didn’t want to put it out. You didn’t want to go out. 
You didn’t want him to go. 
But he doesn’t. Instead, his eyes finally find yours for a moment, before he’s kissing you again and again and again, bruising kisses that slaughter any sense of logic and words from you — but his message is clear, he doesn’t wanna talk, especially as his hand reaches does to brush his aching tip against you, smearing his pre-cum over the length of you. 
And he’s sinking into you, and somehow you’re still so tight around him, “Fuck,” he hisses, the first word that leaves his mouth, “did Satoru not fuck you right last night?” and your lips part as he thrusts harshly and smoothly, bottoming out with one single movement, “still as tight as when I took your virginity, aren’t you, baby?” 
“Suguru,” you’re so full, he’s so thick, and these last few weeks without him almost had your cunt forgetting what he felt like filling you — his hands gripping your thighs to press them back against your stomach, as he pulls back only to slam back in, making you head loll back, “s’good, s’full,” it’s all you can feel, all you can think about, was him, just him. 
“That’s right, I’m the only one who can fill you like this, the only one that makes you feel this good,” the sounds of his hips slapping against you send more heat flooding downward, as he grunts, watching himself piston in and out of you, “take me s’well, my good girl, mine,” he growls, “squeezing me so tight, never want me to leave this sweet cunt, do you?” your thighs shake as he presses them back, balls slapping against your ass, as he only sinks deeper and deeper, “could fuck you all night, don’t hide that face from me,” he’s forcing you to hold his gaze as he fucks you — your glassy eyes blown out with pleasure, your kiss ruined lips parted for him as you panted and moaned, forehead glossy with sweat, “wanna watch you cum around my cock, wanna see you scream my name, pretty baby,” 
His hand slides behind your ass, grabbing a fistful and finding a better angle before slamming back in, and with his filthy words, its enough to have you cumming with his name on your lips, “Sugu—fuck, Suguru!” your voice goes to a pitch you didn’t know it could reach. Toes curling as your gummy walls swallow him in, your pretty mouth forms an ‘o’ and he grunts, imagining those lips around his cock, his thrusts growing sloppy as he fucked you through your orgasm. His dick was soaked, his precum mixing with your cum. 
But he wasn’t done yet. 
He’s slapping your clit, making you jolt, as he’s still pressed inside you, “Sloppy fucking girl, I know you have one more for me,” and you’re so fucked out, he’s guiding your legs around his lower back and hips, making you gasp, “gonna cum in this perfect princess cunt,” 
“Sugu, can’t, It’s too muc—” you nearly sob, but he’s already fucking you, thrusting again and again. And it doesn’t take long for another orgasm to build, already far too sensitive from your last. It’s too much — the feeling of his hips slapping against yours, the feeling of his cock twitching inside your walls, the small moans that your tight cunt pull from his lips, and when his tip brushes against that perfect spot, as his thumb bears down on your clit — it’s too much. You see stars as you cum again, even harder, the loud squelch as he fucks you still pulls a deep groan from his lips. 
“Gonna cum, baby, gonna make a mess of you, fill you up,” he’s grunting, and you’re only nodding and moaning “yes,” still fucked out from your orgasms, but it’s enough for him notch himself deep in you and cum, painting your womb white, as he spurts his seed inside you. 
And his hips stutter, as he eases your legs down, still shaking and quivering from being fucked, and he rubs them, as you pant, his fingers then reaching to wipe your tears, as he eases himself out, groaning as he watched your mixed cums leak out of your cunt. 
“Suguru,” you murmur, and he’s leaning over you, pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead, and your hand reaches for him, cupping his cheek, “I love you,” and you do — you always loved him, you always would — there was never anyone else. Only him. But the words can’t find their way out of your mouth, sleep calling for your attendance, as your fingers run through his hair, pulling his hair tie off, and carding their way through his long hair, “I love the long hair,” you hum, eyes fluttering and heavy with sleep. 
“Do you?” His voice is gravelly, as he leans down, his lips finding your own for moment, before reaching for a bath towel you had slung over your metal bed frame, as he cleans you up, “how much?” 
“Too much, Sugu,” he chuckles softly, as he finishes cleaning you and himself up, pressing soft kisses to your thighs, as he moves to get up and put the towel in the hamper — your hand catches him by the wrist, “Don’t go,” 
And his gaze softens, as he shakes his head, “I’m just taking this to the hamper, I’ll come back to bed,” and your lips form an unfairly cute pout, but you relent, letting him walk away to the bathroom to dispose of the towel, and when he comes back, you’re already asleep, curled up. 
He stands in the doorway, watching your chest rise and fall — and he’s walking over, pulling your comforter over your body, as he holds it open for himself, pausing, only to let it fall and settle on your side. 
He couldn’t ask you to come with him. Couldn’t whisper those words in the night, because you couldn’t save him from the dark — not you, not Satoru, not a single person. Because he wasn’t cut out to live in this world with a smile on his face — and you always deserved to have one on your lips. And Satoru could do that for you. Not him. 
It was never him. He was never good enough — his fingers trace over your cheek, pressing another kiss to your forehead — not for the jujutsu world, and not for you. 
And he turns to leave, sparing a single glance at you — but he’d make a place for him. And maybe for you — make a world that’s safe for them to live in. Where he didn’t have to watch you join the other bodies piled up around him. 
He’s pulling the door shut to your apartment softly, his key left on the table. 
It was over. 
~~~
“You’re late again, as usual,” Suguru smiles, slumping down against a wall, “Satoru,” 
“The ones in Kyoto, they were under your command?” 
“Yes, they all were,” he sways, holding his shoulder, he didn’t have much time left — he couldn’t feel anything, even as he held his wound, he felt nothing — no pain, no anger, no hatred, “no matter what anyone says, I hate those monkeys,” and his thumb brushes lightly over his shoulder, “but I never held any hatred for those in Jujutsu High School,” 
“Did you not? Could’ve surprised me,” and his head turns slowly behind Satoru, and he sees you — sees you for the first time in a decade. Even at his visit to Jujutsu High, you weren’t around — away on a mission, just as he had intended. 
Satoru only sighs, sparing you a glance, “I told you not to come here—” 
“And I told you that I needed to see him,” you brush past Satoru, kneeling by Suguru — and he can’t take his eyes off of you — he had seen pictures, ones he had his twins take (not wanting those money grubbing monkeys to have even an image of you), and he saw you had done quite well for yourself after he had left. A teacher, just like Satoru — trying to foster a new generation of sorcerers — he was right, you were just like him, weren’t you? And he watches as your brow furrows, scanning over his injuries, gears grinding, but he has to halt them right then and there. 
“There’s no saving me now, sweetheart,” he clicks his tongue, “but you know that already, don’t you?” he takes an unsteady breath, leaning back against the wall, his eyes falling over you again, “still so beautiful — how’s that possible?” 
“Not beautiful to stick around for though, am I?” your words aren’t laced with bitterness so much as it’s a question, a question of why he had left you. Why did he never had come back. 
“But beautiful enough to always stay faithful to,” his words are soft, “I don’t have many regrets, not any at all truly in retrospect, but I did lie to you about cheating—” 
“I know,” your hand uses your sleeve to clean some of the blood on his face, scarlet on your palm, “I realized once I thought about it — and I’ve had plenty of time to think about you, Suguru,” your fingers trace his jawline softly, “because thoughts were all you left me with,” 
“Not all I left you with,” his eyes slide back to Satoru and back to you, lips curled in a smile, “you two were always more better suited than I ever was to you, princess,” 
“Suguru—” Satoru starts, but Suguru is shaking his head. 
“It’s rude to interrupt a person’s last words, Satoru,” he clicks his tongue, and his lips curl as he finds your gaze again, your eyes glassy, “don’t look like that, sweetheart,” 
“Suguru, why did you have to leave?” and he’s shaking his head slowly, resting it against the wall behind him. 
“Because I didn’t belong there — I couldn’t live in this world with a real smile on my face,” and his hand reaches for you, but stops, falling back to his shoulder, and tears slip down your cheeks, “but with you, I came close,” he murmurs, and he knew it was time, “Satoru,” and that’s all he had to say to have Satoru start to pull you away. 
“No, no, please—” you’re shaking your head, trying to push past Satoru, but you slump in his arms, “I love you, Suguru, I always will,” 
And he gives a small chuckle, lips curled in that smile that always damned you — “At least curse me at the end,” 
But you never could, as you step away, squeezing your eyes shut as you hear the distant splatter of blood. And you knew — you knew you would have stayed forever, stayed with him forever, if he only had told you not to go. 
But he wouldn’t. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t. 
The two of you bury him, somewhere secluded, where no one would find him. The cold ground was hell to dig up, but the two of you managed somehow, each shovelful feeling like a funeral march with no end in sight. Neither of you could bear the thought of his body being poked and probed for its secrets, before being burned, turned to the ash and smoke, the very same he had left your lives in when he had torched it all to the ground. But even so, you couldn’t bear it — and as you look at the mound before you, you want to claw his body up — dig him up as if it would bring him back to life, pull whatever being or force out of the sky and make them give him back. 
But you can’t — it’s over.
Satoru’s hand finds your shoulder, pulling you into a hug, burying your face in his chest, as he holds you tight to his chest. And he’s leading you away from Suguru, a single flower left over his grave, as the cold air freezes the tear stains left on your cheeks. 
It’s over now. It was over now, right? Right? 
And it was. 
Until Shibuya. 
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a/n: this was supposed to be 3K, and ended up being over 10K. story of my life. this fic is thematically sponsored by 1989 (taylor's version), in particular, the vault tracks that helped me write this. you can literally spot lyric references almost throughout the entire thing
tag list: @ghostkonigkeegan141, @lightblueexorcist, @aemondseyesocket, @lemonpoppy-seed, @stran-dedforyou, @tiaraqueen123, @sun-daddy-yoriichi, @grooveandshit, @prettyabc, @kaskasi, @moranguitosz, @haunting-venus, @ninneko19, @psychicai, @d1rtv, @forest-fruits-jam, @katie91239, @dud3vil, @robynnikole151, @ivory-cove, @ohbi-the-way, @numbinyourchest, @dabisdolly, @kal0pssiaa, @glaceliy, @3atinguout, @iovesatoru, @imthebestbye-blog, @michelleeveline, @ichikanu, @ummcumfurtable, @collectionofdolls, @auraeum, @reesesnieces, @goldfishsmemory, @itshobiscussposts
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6esiree · 25 days
Text
Asking Them to Make A Porn Video With You
Imagine you have an OnlyFans and you ask Alastor, Lucifer, Husk, Vox, and Adam if they want to make a porn video with you for the first time?
Alastor:
When you approached Alastor with this question, he blinked, unsure whether he had heard you correctly. He’s a very private individual, so the mere thought of the two of you being recorded while doing something intimate for others to watch irked him. Alastor was also certain that he’d lose respect as an overlord if word got out that he was participating in adult films—in short, the answer to your question was an easy no.
“Nobody will know it’s you, I promise,” You said, grabbing his hands and pulling him in for an embrace, looking up at him with a pout. “Please, Al? I’ll do anything.”
Alastor was about to shake his head, but when you said that, he hummed, a wicked smile on his face as he considered your offer.
“Hmm, anything, you say?”
“Anything.”
Alastor wouldn’t make you do anything that would put you in harm’s way, however, if he needed a favor in the future, he knew that he could count on you. That is what he reminded himself as he pressed the live button on your phone, capturing the way his cock slid in and out of your cunt. He kept his mouth perfectly shut while you unashamedly tossed your head back against the pillow, making all sorts of pretty sounds for your viewers instead of him.
Alastor felt jealousy stir in his chest as message after message poured in from all the nasty, horny sinners watching your cunt flutter around his cock, but he used it as motivation to make you cum. He focused the camera on your face as he leaned in and plunged into you in a new position, his free hand slithering up your thigh to massage your clit, the head of his cock hitting that velvety spot inside of you.
Your viewers were disappointed, and that gratified Alastor, but only for a bit. As you came, the man’s hand and his thrusts never letting up, you whined, clearly overstimulated. ‘Fuck, fuck, fuck,’ You chanted, tears welling up in your eyes as your body shook underneath him. Yeah, Alastor was definitely going to offer to support you financially after that, the last message he saw on your phone about some random wanting to ‘meet up’ making him shatter your phone in disgust.
The video wasn’t lost, however, Alastor’s eye twitching in annoyance as you named it right next to him.
“Pussy So Good That He Broke My Phone.”
Lucifer:
To say that Lucifer was flustered when you approached him with this question was a severe understatement. You wanted to do what with him? Record the two of you doing something…intimate for others to watch? Yeah, he was the King of Hell, and he could do anything that his heart desired, but he still had a reputation to uphold. You had to assure him that nobody would know that it was him behind the camera to get him to accept, so long as he kept his mouth shut, of course.
“If it’ll make my darling happy then, sure, why not?” Lucifer said, feeling nervous but also slightly excited as you approached him.
“Just because of that, I’ll let you choose what we do,” You said, grabbing his chin and gently lifting it so he could look up at you.
“I, uh—are you sure?” Lucifer squeaked.
You nodded with a ‘mhm,’ your eyes flitting downwards to see how he nervously wrung his hands in front of his pants.
“Get on your knees…please?”
Lucifer shakily held your phone above his stomach, secretly afraid that he’d switch the camera’s perspective as your mouth eagerly swallowed his cock, streaks of cum cascading down your face. You brought your head back, your hand wrapping around the base while your tongue sloppily kissed the head. Lucifer couldn’t help but softly curse, carding his fingers through your hair with his free hand, tugging at you to slow down so he wouldn’t come prematurely.
The way you looked up at him through your lashes, teary-eyed, flushed cheeks, swollen lips and all made him push your head back onto his cock, however, a choked sound escaping your throat as your nose met his pelvis. Lucifer decided that he would subscribe to your channel later on, wanting to revisit how the head peeked through your cheek while you sucked him off, or how your mouth fell open when he finally came, swallowing every drop of cum he had to offer with the corner of your lips curved upwards.
Lucifer is horrified when he finds your video, though, the name making his cheeks flush in embarrassment.
“Big Dick In Charge Gives Me A Facial.”
Husk:
Approaching Husk with this question was a bit of a nerve-wracking experience, especially because you couldn’t easily predict his response. The man was reserved, but he’d also done some…questionable things in his past. That’s why when Husk shrugged and said ‘Why not?’ you weren’t all that surprised, at least not until he told you that he didn’t care about preserving his identity because he had nothing to lose.
“What d’ya want me to do, doll?” Husk asked, answering him by motioning towards the loveseat in the corner of your room.
“Take a seat over here and make yourself comfortable,” You said with a smile, watching him do just that.
You placed your phone on the coffee table in the center, using an adjustable stand to angle it in a way that would only show your lower halves. You took a seat on Husk’s lap, your back against his chest as you lifted up your skirt and slowly spread your legs for the camera to see, whispering ‘Touch me,’ to him. Husk obliged, his fingers pulling your underwear to the side, exposing your cunt to the cold air. You moaned as he massaged your clit, feeling him poke your ass from the confines of his pants.
Husk didn’t free himself, however, his other hand going around your waist, unbuttoning your shirt to fondle your breasts. He felt rather powerful as you writhed on his lap, your juices staining his crotch as he kept denying your orgasm. Nobody else could have you like this, so he hoped you’d incorporate him in your future videos to remind your viewers of that. For now, Husk decided to indulge in your pleas while he toyed with your cunt, his mouth latching onto your neck as he plunged two fingers into your hole.
Out of curiosity, Husk asked you what you named your video, his ears falling flat against his head with a groan when you told him.
“Old Man Plays With My Kitty.”
Vox:
Image—that’s what Vox valued the most, and everybody knew that. That’s why when you approached him with this question, you weren’t surprised when he told you no, turning his back to you as he resumed whatever he was previously doing. You pretended to head towards the elevator, mumbling something about asking Valentino to help you instead, Vox immediately materializing in front of you with a ‘I changed my mind.’
“I’ll do it, so long as no recognizable part of me comes out,” Vox said, staring down at you as he rounded you. “Not even my hands, sweetheart. Everybody knows who I am.”
“Fine, just…stand behind me,” You instructed him, the camera zoomed in on you.
“Like this?” Vox said, unbuckling his belt and undoing his pants when you nodded.
Vox held onto your hips with a tight grip, your legs closed shut as his cock slid between your folds from behind. He was struggling to stay quiet, used to dirty talking with you when he was making you feel good. At least your moans gave you away, he thought as the head of his cock purposely missed your hole, massaging your clit instead. Vox had never done this before, and as good as it felt gliding through your wetness, he could tell you weren’t getting much out of it.
Your viewers were enjoying watching you get teased, though, all sorts of degrading names directed at you flooding the chat. Oh, did that piss off Vox. He suddenly kicked your legs open, thrusting up into you without any warning. You let out a cry, feeling relieved but also confused, especially because everybody would recognize his clothes. But Vox would deal with that later, too busy listening to your cunt squelch as he fucked you at a relentless pace.
When Vox got on his monitors after that, preparing to hypnotize whoever watched your video, he started choking on his coffee.
“Watch Me Get Fucked From Behind—A Video You’ll Probably Forget.”
Adam:
For someone who loved having sex, everywhere and anywhere and in whatever position imaginable, Adam was a stuttering mess when you approached him with this question. To be fair, it’s an entirely different thing to record yourself doing something intimate for many to see, so you had to assure him that nobody would find out who he was, in Heaven or in Hell, taking into account the fact that he always wore his mask.
“I’ve fucked, like, a shit ton of people before you, babe,” Adam said as he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “You don’t think they’ll recognize my dick?”
“Yeah, uh, I kind of doubt that but…” You started, backing up until the back of your knees hit the bed. “Maybe you could eat me out? Most people are used to seeing you with your mask on, so…yeah.”
Adam was also used to being on the receiving end, but he eventually shrugged, taking off his mask before pushing you down. “Only your mouth comes out—it’s a closeup,” You told him when he shot the phone next to his face a suspicious look. He mumbled ‘Yeah, yeah,’ a sigh escaping your throat as he kissed you through your panties, teasing you almost in revenge for making him get on his knees. Adam secretly enjoyed it, however, the wetness he was greeted by when he moved the lacey fabric aside serving to boost his ego.
The man had you panting in no time, his tongue fluttering against your clit as a mixture of his saliva and your juices dribbled down his chin. His fingers worked away at your cunt, too, relentlessly massaging that velvety spot inside of you. Adam almost cursed when you suddenly pulled his head back by his hair, the look of confusion on his face instantly contorting into one of surprise as you convulsed around his fingers, a clear liquid cascading down your thighs.
He blinked, the disbelief evident on his features as you suddenly ended the live video, your chest heaving and your legs trembling. “I just made you squirt, babe, holy shit!” Adam said, making you laugh. You proceeded to sit up and seize his collar, encouraging him to get on top of you. “Do that again, but with your dick this time.” Of course, he did not hesitate when it came to that, straining against his robes as he noticed the mess underneath you.
Adam was content with how everything went down…until he logged into your account when you were asleep, his eyes bugging out of his head at the name of the video.
“Dickmaster? More like Pussymaster: How To Make Someone Squirt.”
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