#Ive seen several companies do this now

[cunning-conjurer]

Watching small unregulated food companies let their kids play in their food products without having washed their hands always make me fucking gag 🤢

Glad you think it's cute to violate health codes with your kids for "adorable" internet content, but that's unhygienic and gross as you're going to turn this into food and drinks you're planning to sell to the public....

[megumi-fm]

.

[paralien]

what if I just kill myself in the most fucked up way possible at work. giving the guests at the hotel trauma for life when they find me in some hannibal-eque grotesque state in the lobby. would that be fucked up or what hahaha

[fratboykate]

I'm totally in support of the writers in theory but I'm trying to understand more of what you're fighting for because I've seen some people on twitter claim writers make more money a week than most of us make in a month so I'm trying to understand what the issue is. Also if that info is accurate. This is a genuine question. Not trying to have a "gotcha moment". I really want to hear from a writer.

people have always had wild misconceptions about how much a writer earns because of their lack of understanding of how the industry actually works. there's so many posts about how "you guys make 5k a week. what more do you want?!" yeah...let's do some math on that.

5k a week for 14 weeks (and that's a long room. a lot of rooms these days are 8-10 weeks. those are the dreaded mini-rooms we're trying to kill) is $70,000. for roughly three months of work. you'd think we're cooking with gas...BUT HOLD UP. that's gross! let's see everything that has to come out of that check:

10% to our agent

10% to our manager

5% to our entertainment attorney

5% to our business manager (not everyone has one but a lot of us do. i do, so that's literally 30% immediately off the top of every check)

most of these breakdowns ive seen downplay taxes severely. someone made one that says writers pay 5% in taxes and i would like to ask them "in what universe?". that doesn't even cover state taxes. the way taxes work in the industry is really complicated, but the short of it is most of us have companies for tax reasons so we aren't taxed like people on w2s/1099. if we did we'd be even more fucked. basically every production hires a writer's company instead of the writer as an individual. so they engage our companies for our services and then at the end of the year we (the company) pay taxes as corporations or llcs (depending on what the writer chose to go with). my company is registered as a "corporation" so let's go with those rates. california's corporate rate is 9% and the federal corporate tax rate is 21%. there's other expenses with running a business like fees and other shit so my business managers/accountants/bookkeepers have recommended i save between 35-40% of everything i make for when tax season comes.

you see where the math is at already??? 25-30% in commissions and then 35-40% in taxes. on the lower end you're at THE VERY LEAST looking at 60% of that check gone. 70% worst case scenario. suddenly those $70,000 people claim we make are actually down to $28,000 as the take home pay. and that's if you're only losing 60%. it goes down to $21,000 if it's 70%.

lets pretend you worked a long 14 week room (that's the longest room ive ever worked btw) and let's also be generous and say you only have 60% in expenses so the take home is $28,000. average rent in los angeles is around $2,800-$3,000. if you're paying $2,800 in rent that means you need AT LEAST $4,000 a month to have a semi decent life since you need to also cover groceries, gas, medical expenses, toiletries, phone, internet, utilities, rental and car insurances, car payments, student loan payments, etc etc etc. and again, this is los angeles. everything is more expensive so you're living BARE BONES on 4k. and these are numbers as a single person. im not even taking having children into account. so those $28,000 you take home might cover your life for 6-7 months. 3 of which you're in the room working. the reality is that once that room ends, you might not work in a room again for 6-9-12 months (i have friends whose last jobs were over 18 months ago) and you now only have about 3 months left of savings to hold you over. we have to make that money stretch while we do all the endless free development we do for studios and until we get our next paying job. so...3 months left of enough money to cover your expenses -> possible 9 months of not having a job. this is how writers end up on food stamps or applying to work at target.

this is why we're fighting for better rates and better residuals. residuals were a thing writers used to rely on to get them through the unemployment periods. residual checks have gone down from 20k to $0.03 cents. im not joking.

they've decimated our regular pay and then destroyed residuals. we have nothing left. so don't believe it when they tell you writers are being greedy. writers are simply fighting to be able to make a middle class living. we're not asking them to become poor for our sake. we're asking for raises that amount to 2% of their profit. TWO PERCENT. this is a fight for writing even being a career in five years instead of something you do on the side while you work retail to pay your bills. if you think shows are bad now imagine when your writer has to do it as a hobby because they need a real job to pay their bills and support a family. (which none of us can currently afford to have btw)

support writers. stop being bootlickers for billion dollar corporations. stop caring about fictional people more than you care about the real people that write them. if we don't win this fight it truly is game over. the industry as you know it is gone.

[waddlewaddlewaddlewaddle]

Over my head (Miguel ‘o’ Hara x Reader)

Chapter 4

Wc:1.9k

Tw: mentions of blood

Themes: ✎slow burn ( I think)

Mutual pining

✎office romance (¿)

Hidden romance

✎Smut available as story progresses.

Dom Miguel x sub/bratty reader

✎Stubborn, Ill tempered Miguel.

✎ Angelic reader .

It girl reader.

✎I try to be as accurate as possible.

English is not my first language so bare with me.

✎badass stoic x sweet empath.

Og spanish speaker so be prepared for steamy dialogue :3

Here’s the master list for previous or future chapters.

⋆｡°✩ ⋆｡°✩🕸

-"Miguel!"- Your body couldn't help but call out his name after seeing such a scene.

A crimson gaze met yours , his face froze as if he'd been caught red handed.

-"Greetings."-He replied as he could since blood was cascading over the corner of his mouth.-"If you excuse me i'll be on my way."- Miguel turned his back and tried to walk away before your voice interrupted him.

-"Are you crazy?! you're losing a stupid amount of blood, what even happened to you?

-"Well i've clearly been better"-He noted in a sarcastic tone.-"But if you must know ive just been flung around by some villains, i could've left less beaten up but i didn't want to interrupt the party they organized for you.”

-"Miguel that's ridiculous , just look at you.-You pressed an open gash on his neck to which he quickly winced to.-"If you needed assistance you should've just called."

In a moment lyla appeared and sat on his shoulder.

-"That's what i told him, we should let him suffer for being so hard headed.”-Lyla joked.

Miguel knotted his eyebrows and shooed her of his shoulders trying to maintain the last string sanity that allowed him to keep a cordial conversation while in extreme pain.

-"come with me, let me tend to your injuries"

-"Thanks for the offered but i can stand a punch, go back to the party now."

you couldn't help but roll your eyes incredulous of this mans priorities.

-"You're literally about to collapse and all you care about is a stupid party?!"-You groaned out at him in hopes that he gets the severity of the matter at hand.

-"Its not just a party."-He expressed with seriousness.-"I haven't seen my spider people that happy in a while, they're joyful to have you here and seem to trust you already. you wouldnt understand but they need that morale to withstand the burden of their responsibilities.So please go back and keep them company ; i can handle myself."

-"What about you?" You asked gleeful after hearing the first kind words Miguel has said to you.

-"What about me?"

-"How do you feel about having me here?"

Miguel looked back at lyla for any indication on how he should respond but she just raised her shoulders at him.

-"Well i certainly feel ... happy?"-He responded with awkwardness so you knew he was lying, catching up onto your disapproving gaze he finally answered with the truth.-With confidence i can say i'm relieved by having you here.

As you grinned in satisfaction with his answer you remembered he was on the brink of falling over, which by the way is very unprofessional on your behalf, you couldn't help it , you found yourself lost in conversation. To convince Miguel to allow to get himself treated you asked dad bod peter to send the spiders some beer and it was as if you never left.

🕸 ⋆｡°✩ ⋆｡°✩🕸

With some struggle you managed to get Miguel to go to the infirmary, you indicated him to sit down on stool near your desk.

His big figure almost didn't fit on the stool, his eyes followed you around the room as you woke up your bots.

-“You've fixed this place up nicely.”-He commented lookin at the fresh tulips on the desk while the room lit up with painting prints and the floor gleamed with beautiful carpets.

-“Thank you, I never had the chance to decorate an infirmary so I wanted to put things that could make my patients feel happy or at ease.”-You said looking at your hologram table while viewing his medical chart to see any allergies or pre existing conditions. - Nino can you run a CT scan and an MRI , Kiko be a dear and takes his vitals and oxygen saturation levels while I go grab some tools to clean his face right up.

While you went to the back room for sanitizing materials lyla looked at him funny seeing him in his little stool waiting to be treated.

-“I should ask her to bring a tweezer to see if maybe she’ll do you a favor and clean up those bushy eyebrows of yours.”-Said the artificial intelligence while he sits up straight in his chair clearly wishing he wasn’t in such a vulnerable position.

-“If you don’t close that pixel sized mouth of yours I’m gonna ask spider byte to make you bald.”- He retorted with a straight face to which lyla just responded by sticking up her middle finger and vanishing in the air.

Soon you walked back into the room with your lab coat and your hair tied up in a bun while holding some materials.

-“Are you ready for this , big boy? It’s gonna sting a bit so tell me if you need me to slow down.”- You said as you put on your latex gloves.-“My bots are gonna take a while to take your tests so after I finish cleaning you up they’ll tell me what’s up with you.”

-“I already told you I’m fine Y/n.”- Miguel hasn’t stepped in an infirmary in a long time , so he feels very out of place.

-“We’ll see about that, I’d sit down to treat you but all id see is your chest.”-You giggled.-“Not that I’m complaining though!” -You watched as Miguel raised and eyebrow and you could swear you saw the corner of his mouth go up.-“Wow peter was right, you really don’t have a sense of humor.”

-“I Do have a sense of humor is just that -ow!”-Miguel jumped as he felt the sting of the cotton swab cleaning his cheek

-“I’m sorry , I’m sorry I’ll be more gentle.”- You brought your face closer to his while being more gentle with the swab.

Miguel suddenly felt heat rushing to his cheeks he didn’t know if it was because your face was just mere inches from his or because when you noticed you were hurting him you truly cared for his comfort and started to be more gentle.

All of a sudden one of your bots started ringing like and alarm.

-“WARNING HEART RATE ELEVATED TO 113 BPM.”- Said kiko while spinning ad flashing red lights.

- “That’s strange.” -You comment as you quickly bandage his face up so you can investigate the reason of his quick heart rate.

-“That machine must be broken.”- Said Miguel a little embarrassed while hunching up his shoulders ,you just gave him an unconvinced glare.

-“Nino can you give me the results of the scan please.”

-“CT and MRI indicate ribs number 6 and 7 are fractured, MRI reveals no damage done to blood vessels or lungs.”- Said Nino unconcerned.

Your jaw dropped to the floor while you looked over at the man that treating broken ribs like a stubbed toe.

-“Miguel why didn’t you tell me you had broken ribs!”- You yelled out in shock someone could sit still with broken ribs.

-“I didn’t know, why are you mad at me? I’m the one with broken ribs.”- He noted while arching a brow.

-“Are you dumb?! You can puncture your lungs and god forbid provoke some interior hemorrhage. Take your shirt off right now!”

Miguel was about to scold you for calling him dumb but was quickly fluttered by you requesting him to take his shirt off.

-“What?”- He replied dumbfounded

-“Take your shirt off so I can examine you , quickly.”

“Oh maybe you are dumb Miguel ” he thought to himself for thinking about other things when you asked him to take his shirt off , he quickly pressed some buttons on his watch and in a few seconds his bare torso was revealed to you. You couldn’t help but blush as you saw such a shredded torso with beautiful sculpted shoulders, you knew he was your boss but goddam this man never skips arm day. You quickly shake your head trying to get rid of those teenage girl like thoughts and start to press on the bruised skin on top of his ribs to examine the situation.

-“Does it hurt much?”

-“Nope.”

-“What about now?” You say as you apply some pressure on the affected area.

-“Auugh.”- He groaned as he winced.-“That trick of yours is getting old.”

Miguel glanced over at your direction noticing you had a quite worried face , as soon as you noticed his stare you quickly gave him a fake smile. -“I think it’s quite funny, wait here I’ll get some pain medication and a rib splint.”

You bolted to the storage room and back and started to load the syringe.

-“I can assure you this won’t hurt much , I have the gentlest hands in the business you know?”-You bragged while squatting while injecting the fluid into the tender spot in his ribs.- “If you feel any type of discomfort please let me know Miguel , you shouldn’t hide and injury like this I’m glad I caught you sneaking off. People depend on you , the spider society needs you in the best condition you can be. Even so regardless of who you are you should always take care of yourself.”

Miguel grinned taking advantage of the fact that your sight was straight on his ribs, he was truly moved by your words , they seemed sincere in his ears, he usually didn’t trust people this rapidly but to him you yelled out trustworthiness. He also didn’t want to admit that your proximity and care was making him feel some kind of way he quickly wanted to bury those thoughts in the back of his head. But there was a question pestering him so he gave into his desires and grabbed you by the wrist so he would get your attention.

You quickly looked up at him , your doe eyes looking up at him with innocent confusion made his his throat stiffen up.

-“Why do you care so much about me, after all we only met yesterday.” He questioned getting lost in your gaze.

-“You seem like a good person , you also seem like a dutiful man plus you really care about your workers . You seem to have the courage other people seem to lack. In summary for the moment you’re on my good side , let’s hope you stay that way buddy. But even if you weren’t a good person in my perception, you’re still a person who’s hurt and needs help , that’s enough for me to give my all in treating them.”- You smiled at him hoping your answer was good enough for him while returning to inject the fluid in various points of his ribs.

Miguel felt content with your answer which allowed him to be more relaxed in your presence after all he felt uncomfortable being seen so vulnerable , he was used to acting the part of the tough one.

-“Don’t call me buddy. I am your boss.”- He joked trying to switch the mood.

-“My bad Mr ‘o’ Hara. I’ll put on the brace splint now. ” You chimed as you stood between his right leg and leaned down to apply the splint trying to end this procedure as soon as possible so you could get out of this compromising position.

As you were almost done applying the splint you and Miguel heard a drunk voice come closer while the door handle moved , both of your eyes met in fear that someone would see you and misinterpret the situation.

-“y/n!!!! Are you here???? I’m coming innnnnnnn……”

A/n: I’m sorry for the delay I’ve been busy with work 😭 but I’m really happy with the way this chapter turned out.

[dddomenstarstwst]

okay so ive had this idea in my head for, like, several days and haven’t seen anyone write it soooo may i request a rinne x reader hatefuck? he’s hot but also wow that personality is. a lot. he should go to therapy

I feel you, my dear, i fully do. He's such a dick actually, i wanna slap him dumb. So, uh, maybe i got a little carried away. Oops?

➜ Annoying

Character: Rinne Amagi

Genre: Smut

Warnings: sub!Rinne, dom!gn!reader, hate sex, slapping, cock stepping, degradation, brat!Rinne, dumbification, rough sex, asphyxiation

Word count: 888

You couldn't stand Rinne Amagi. You hated him with every fucking inch of your body. He was just too much. You had no idea how his unit mates manage not to kick him in the nuts whenever they see him.

Rinne loved to tease you, he specifically seeked for you in the hallways just to fuck with you. It was almost his sole purpose. That, and he also found riling you up hot. Whenever you were mad, veins popping on your hands, eyes burning him in a deadly gaze, teeth gritting audibly - fuck, it made him horny.

You knew what he was trying to do, you knew how he looked at you when you got mad, you knew how very visibly he gulped, how the shade of pink covered his cheeks whenever you barked back at him. That alone made you hate him even more, to the point that you slapped him one time.

He was being annoying as usual, but somehow it was a thousand times worse. He was joking about how you were undressing him with your eyes and stuff, how he sees you looking at his dick. You were already in a bad mood, and his endless teasing wasn't helping. So you slapped him, it just happened. You weren't controlling yourself.

"Fuck! Rinne, uh– Sorry about that," he stood there, eyes wide open, mouth agape, a red mark forming on his cheek. You thought he was going to be mad, throw a tantrum and tell the higher-ups of the ES about it. But he... Smiled. You watched as the dumb smile spread on his face, you thought he was crazy, maybe you broke him, maybe he just needed therapy.

"Can you do that again?" It was your time to stand there with eyes staring at him, not understanding what the fuck he just said. He grabbed your hand and put it on his stinging cheek, "Slap me. I know ya want to." And you did.

You don't remember how you ended up in one bad with that asshole, but he was honestly pathetic. With the way he arched his back like a cheap whore, or how utterly pornographic his moans were you thought he was taking a d regularly. Hm, maybe that's how two of his unit mates manage to stay sane in his company. Kohaku, you're sure, punched him once or twice.

Rinne grinded back on you, taking more of your dick, grinning like a maniac when you slapped his ass. What a slut. He was enjoying every single second of this, you wonder if he ever imagined spreading his ass for you. You thrust into him harshly, still lost in thoughts.

"Hey! Pay attention to me! Ya fuckin' me, okay!" You grabbed his flaming red hair and pulled it back, glaring at him. What a dumb guy, can't see the signals. You're not lovers, you're fucking him because you want to put him in his place.

"Shut up, whore. Stop acting like we're lovers, i hate you and that's why I'm fucking you right now. Just because you're taking my cock in your slutty ass doesn't give you the right to order me around, bitch!" He whined at your words, hips buckling back. You let go of his messy locks and press his face into the mattress.

Rinne was shaking from your rough pounding, the lack of air only added to his pleasure. He felt you shift your position, pulling out of his stretched out hole. He tried chasing you, but you steadied his hips. He turned his head to the side, blue teary eyes watching your movements. You looked mad and, oh fuck, how hot you looked. Rinne wiggled his ass, inviting you in.

You scoffed at his behaviour, before grabbing him by the waist and slamming your cock fully inside. Rinne moaned your name out, his legs were trembling and giving up, if not for you, he would have collapsed already. You continue fucking him roughly, your breathing heavy.

"Oh! Ah, ah, yes! Fuck me like a whore!" You gripped his waist harder, surely bruises are gonna be left there, not like any of you cared. You observed as Rinne reached down to jerk himself, he was getting close. Your hand made its way to his throat, settling there and squeezing his neck, cutting off the air.

Rinne was overwhelmed, he never felt like this, not even when Niki and MERUMERU fucked him at the same time. Well, actually that was hot too, but maybe not as much as how you absolutely demolished him right now. Fuck, he needed to come so badly, especially when he felt the hand on his neck gripping so hard.

You thrusted with all your might, sending Rinne over the edge. His vision got blurry, stars appearing before his eyes, he was coughing because of the lack of an air, his whole body convulsing. You pulled out, letting him flop down on the bed.

"I'm hopping after that you'll stop bothering me, dumb bitch." You made your way out of the room, leaving him there. Rinne finally steadied his breath, before grinning to yourself. Oh no, not after being fucked so good. He'll make sure to rile you up even more from now on. Maybe he should invite you to fuck him alongside Niki and MERUMERU.

[dairy-farmer]

I need POVs of other people in that Dick is emotionally manipulative by slitting ask. Like, I need to see people realizing far too late that they let Tim down once again. I need people to be horrified. Maybe they're only clued in on it when Damian comes back and starts acting like Damian is his child and Tim is Damian's mother. At first, they thought Dick was joking but then they're seeing less and less of Tim. Even Damian has brought up some concerns. He likes how Tim is treating him nicely but there's something wrong about the way Dick is going about it. What if it was a civilian who tries to talk to Tim first about this? Like Bernard or Ives? Oddly enough, They moved out of Gotham soon after never to be seen again. But Damian or Tim swears he once woke up in the middle of the night and saw Dick covered in blood

dick in that severe emotional manipulation au would absolutely have tim wrapped around his finger following his perceived suicide attempt. the rest of the family and his friends would also similarly fall in line because they knew dick had been struggling but they hadn't thought, they'd never considered he'd do this!!! they start paying close attention, keeping dick company, doing the same as tim essentially because while tim is traumatized from being the one to find him the others are equally as concerned.

and this is here people notice the cracks. where they notice how...things don't quite line up. there are oddities, discrepancies in dick's story, in how he acts afterward, in the things he says.

his friends are in other cities and can't be there so they message and call him and get worried when he doesn't reply but are satisfied when others in the family tell them dick is fine. but the gotham capes, the other bats in the family...they're detectives and they're picking up on something, something that their guts tell them is... not quite right.

now... you can't just....accuse someone of faking taking their own life. that is a VERY serious accusation with very serious repercussions and if that's what you suspect you sure as shit better be right.

they don't feel...good about the suspicions but they can't help them. dick doesn't quite ACT like how people who have survived suicide attempts do. granted, not everyone fits into the same box, but dick? dick's behavior afterward is just...odd.

he doesn't want to be committed. even though he just attempted to take his own life, he refuses evaluation or help from a professional even though it's something that NEEDS to happen because...because then maybe things wouldn't have gotten this bad. dick refuses. even when someone is brought in he just clams up. refuses to speak, refuses to look at the person.

shame isn't unexpected following an attempt. anger, despair, regret. dick would likely be feeling a whole cacophony of emotions.

but then tim is brought in. and then dick is soft and pitiful, then he's emotional with his eyes filling with tears, he's reaching for tim and crying, sobbing, asking tim to stay with him and hold him while trembling like a beaten dog. and the shift from calm to that is just...strange.

dick clinging to one person would be understandable...but there's just something...not right.

the family can't help it. they can't help the oddness of how they feel.

and they're not the only ones. tim's civilian friends pick up on it too- on the rare occasions they go to visit tim at the manor because tim very rarely leaves the manor, always too concerned about dick. they all know tim's older brother isn't fully...stable. they read in the paper about it, the tabloids had gushed about it and the 'drama!' of it all.

sometimes they see tim's brother. he's in an armchair usually in the same room as them wearing soft flannel pajamas and a thick quilt over his lap and staring into space. they want to ask if he's on medications or something because he always looks so vacant and empty but it seems rude to ask. and tim always looks so haggard and stressed and tired so they keep quiet and just ask how he's been.

their visits aren't frequent and ives completely stops visiting, only calling, because one time he'd been leaving the manor. tim had been walking him to the door but then he'd realized he's left behind his hat and so he'd told tim he'd be back in a minute and then jogged back to the room where dick had remained quietly seated.

ives never told tim about what happened in that room. and...he'd hesitated to tell bernard but then bernard had told him about the 'weird vibe' dick gave off whenever he visited tim and so ives had confided in him. he told him about how he'd walked back to the room and spotted his hat on a couch cushion of the sitting room where he and tim had spent the entire afternoon talking with dick silent and staring off into space nearby. there'd been a large wall of windows that peeked into the garden behind the couch. it was nighttime when ives had left and his back had been to dick as he bent over for his hat. when he'd looked up, he'd caught sight of their reflections in the windows and felt a chill go up his spine when he saw dick turned fully to face him, face twisted in hatred and glaring at ives. when he'd turned around dick had been back to normal and staring off into space but the encounter had freaked ives up enough that he hadn't gone back.

when damian returns through some set of miracles he also picks up on the oddness of dick and tim and the way dick behaves.

no one can quite put their finger on it. they're not sure what it is. but...they know its not normal. they think, they believe, they know- whatever had happened on that night where everything changed...it was no accident.

[mariacallous]

The myth that there is a humane way to execute someone who wants to live is getting harder to maintain in Alabama.

In early 2018, the state tried to execute a terminally ill man, Doyle Lee Hamm, whose veins had deteriorated from drug use and treatment for cancer and hepatitis C. Executioners, whose identities are concealed but who typically do not have medical backgrounds, repeatedly jabbed him in the legs, ankles and groin as they tried to set the IV line. They stopped only when the death warrant was close to expiring and Hamm’s groin was covered in blood. 

A few weeks later, the state authorized a new execution method: death by nitrogen gas. At the time, it was purely hypothetical. Two other states allow it, but there had never been a known instance of a nitrogen execution. 

That changed on Thursday, when Alabama killed 58-year-old Kenneth Smith by affixing a mask over his face and forcing him to inhale only nitrogen. He “appeared to shake and writhe on the gurney, sometimes pulling on the restraints” for at least two minutes, followed by several minutes of heavy breathing, The Associated Press reported.  

“It was the most horrible thing I think I’ve ever seen,” said the Rev. Jeff Hood, Smith’s spiritual adviser, who has observed five executions in the past 13 months. 

This was Smith’s second time in an execution chamber. A little more than a year ago, he spent four hours strapped to a gurney, awaiting execution as his final appeals made their way through the court system. Executioners jabbed his hands, arms and collarbone before finally calling off his lethal injection. The botched execution left him severely traumatized. He experienced nightmares, hypervigilance, hyperarousal and dissociation up until his death. 

Smith’s 2022 experience was the third in a series of consecutive botched executions in Alabama. 

In the lead-up to Smith’s death, his lawyers urged the courts to block the nitrogen execution, warning that Smith risked facing a slow, painful death by asphyxiation — or even surviving but in a “persistent vegetative state.” 

The state attorney general’s office dismissed those concerns, claiming that nitrogen is “perhaps the most humane method of execution ever devised,” a baseless supposition undermined by the American Veterinary Medical Association’s recommendation that nitrogen not be used to euthanize most mammals. Rats who were exposed to nitrogen gas showed signs of “panic and distress” before they died, the group said.  

The U.S. Supreme Court allowed the execution to proceed, with the three liberal justices dissenting. 

“Twice now this Court has ignored Smith’s warning that Alabama will subject him to an unconstitutional risk of pain. The first time, Smith’s predictions came true,” Justice Sonia Sotomayor wrote in her dissent on Thursday, just before the execution. “This time, he predicts that Alabama’s protocol will cause him to suffocate and choke to death on his own vomit. I sincerely hope that he is not proven correct a second time.” 

“The world is watching,” Sotomayor wrote.  Other executing states are watching, too. As states struggle to carry out lethal injections in the face of litigation and opposition from drug companies, many are looking for new ways to kill — including firing squads and even cyanide gas, the preferred killing method of Nazi Germany. That the Supreme Court allowed Alabama to evade accountability over one secretive execution method by simply switching to another will not go unnoticed in other states.

[glitched-dawn]

General blog info

Since I said I would do this (actually I am just bored and no one knows wtf is going on in this blog) Imma make a masterpost with the general info of the blog and what's going on here. and also a little info about myself because ppl need more info abt me to send hate anons:

im a writer, obviously. im also a demiromantic apothisexual transmasc. i like baking, going out in the woods, writing (obviously), drawing and making art, playing instruments and singing, and im also a big fan of either napping half the day or staying up all night.

im not in very many fandoms but i like hollow knight, inmost, lethal company, terraria, bramble the mountain king, and ive recently gotten into heartstopper (in other words i began watching it with my more or less heartstopper-obsessed cousin, she is very sweet and yes i think the show is pretty cute too). other than that, im gonna watch more horror movies and series as that's what i write too.

(DNI is very small. do not interact with me if your intentions have anything to do with sex. thats it. i am SEVERELY sex-repulsed and will be triggered by anything that society has made sexual. its easier in text but for the fucking love of god do not send me pictures.)

now, onto the content:

Content:

writing snippets

aspec posting

stories and poems

a little bit of venting/storytime/complaining

talking to ma homies

a little bit of art

a series of writing snippets called "new/out of context quotes and quips"

probably something else i forgot

(also the reason i dont have a venting blog is bcuz hot topic i think ill keep everything in one place cuz im one person and i feel different things lmfao (yes i am also surprised by the fact that i have emotions apparently))

now a masterlist of my writing:

Novels and works-in-progress (AKA everything i write):

My main novel series, Broken Promises, currently contains ten novels:

Breached Containment

Twisted Betrayal

The Final Hunt

The Madman's Strive

Broken Strings (AKA Bring Us To Life)

Pinky Promise?

Too Late

Welcome To My Mind

BACKWARDS

I'm Sorry

and here's the main characters, main cast and the main side characters:

Ambrose Blackthorne

Ace Dawn

Caleb Whitlock

Dylan Hunter

Jason Godfrey

Juan Moreno

The Shadow Reaper (he has a name but its revealed in the seventh novel so im waiting with it)

Zafirah Satar

Kierce Cadell

Joseph Clayton

Blake Campbell

Steven Zhai

Ashley

Silly Sally

James Forest

Phoenix Loughty

Rahmah Abdullah Aziz

Rick Davis

Zane Hawklum

Gabriella Roseware

Alicia Wood

Rose Andersson

Eleanor Dawn

Michael Godfrey

(there are probably a lot more that are either family to the mcs or minor side characters, so im not including them here)

other than that, i have a few standalones that i work on every now and then:

Misplaced Faith

Inescapable Lucidity

Blades of Rose (with several co-authors, including @ang3lic-t3ars and @daredevil-arty)

We All Eventually Drown (with one co-author)

then, of course, i have a bunch of smaller projects, most of them related to my novel series:

The Solic AKA the new bible

Realms of Selinc - A Beastiary

A whole lot of music. just a doc named Music

The Anomalies, the start of a horror skit yt channel

PHOBIA, a video game that im not working on at the moment

I Was Born With A Gift - a prologue to the animation channel where I will animate my novel series on streams and such

All of the Darkrimm, Lumancyid included (hell and heaven lore)

A bunch of rituals. Do Not Question

Two D&D campaigns, one a homebrew and the other just. heaven and hell from BP (the novel series)

And since im extremely bored ill make an ask game so yall can ask me abt stuff (mostly the writing i gotta get more active in that)

have me tell you about one of my novels/works

ask about a character

ask about something you've seen in a snippet (specify)

wait actually you could just ask yourself from what youve seen and then ask extra info if youre curious about something

yeah acc just know my inbox is open for absolutely everything except stuff that goes against my DNI so u go ask stuff homies and thats it

well thats all i had to say so buhbyeee

[dearweirdme]

one day I'll stop writing essays in your asks but your questions and the responses are always so interesting to me especially as a non taekooker! So here's another one,lol.

I always knew another member was coming to taes picnic. I knew for the same reason I wasnt surpised when 3 of the members performed at yoongis concerts.

BTS want to see army. That's their whole thing. If they can make time for it that's what they're going to do. I'll admit that I thought it was gonna be JK who came and I assumed it was going to be him up until I heard he left Korea again. Then I was pleasantly surprised when Jimin came.

Not to shade the person who is exhausted by the "vmin" soul mate thing but Jimin wasn't going to taes vicnic because of some elaborate ruse by hybe to push the soul mate narrative, like its not 2020. Nor do i think he was there to make it seem like their relationship is soooo strong.

I want to remind people this is the duo who people have joked about being divorced all year. They both have only recently started mentioning each other and hanging out so I definitely dont think they care about our perception of their closeness through a platonic soulmates lens.I think Jimin and taes friendship is beautiful and i think if youre lucky you'll have several playonic soul mates in your lifetime. I think thats what jimin and tae were/are saying when and if they still use that word about each other.

Its pretty obvious that Jimin was there, not for any elaborate narrative or as a flimsy substitute for Jk. Jimin came cause tae asked him too and beause Jimin enjoys seeing army. Its pretty in his nature to show up for his members and he misses army. He told us he did in his live less than 48 hours ago so why wouldn't he jump at the chance to see us/them?

As to why JK wasn't there its the same reason he didn't get on live for like a month. He had a schedule, he's very busy. And for any taekooker who worries or gets irrationaly annoyed by them not having as much time together, you should know that taekook is more used to each others schedules than any of us are. Im sure JK was worried about tae and missed him when tae was going non-stop as I'm sure tae is worried and missing JK now. But whatever you believe they're doing, jk not being there today doesn't change it and I'm sure he wish he could have been.

I dont see him not showing up as a grand scheme by the company to push any type of narrative but just obvious logistics. Frankly if JK was home and didn't have a schedule I think JK and Jimin both would have come.

((((And this is a bit of a tangent but regarding the idea that theres a fandom narrative that taekook isn't close, I personally am not a taekooker or a jikooker and have never seen that narrative in any of my fandom spaces. I don't think the majority of the Fandom outside of the straw lovers believes that at all, but i could be wrong. Now do I think there's a huge focus on their closeness, when it comes to marketing or pairing them up? No, lol.But if I'm in a queer relationship with my band mate and I'm not ready to be perceived by the public I would take there not being a huge focus or emphasis on my relationship as a blessing. Just a different perspective i thought id offer ,but I get pushing back on the narrative when you see it because honestly its annoying when anyone says two members arent close, but I will say ive never heard anyone say taekook isnt close personally.))

anyways that's my essay for the day and since I seem to be popping up here a lot I will sign off this time so in the future when i pop up you know it's me lol- BYM

Hi BYM-anon!

Sorry for being a bit late in responding!

I agree with most of your ask. I think the things we disagree on are that I think Tae and Jk are more to each other than friends, and I think a large portion of fandom actually does think Tae and Jk drifted apart between 2016 and 2020. I think most of fandom sees that they are close now, and have been for some years.. but there's still those (yes, probably Jkkrs mostly) that disagree.

I think in part the lack of Tkk footage is from allowing them privacy and safety. From Bighit's perspective, having an actual in band relationship must've been super unconvenient, no matter how they personally view queer relationships or Tae and Jk as persons, business wise it's seen as a risk. There's the risk of them breaking up, there's the risk of them having a rocky relationship with drama, there's the risk of them being distracted, there's the risk of discovery in a queer unfriendly country. So I think as soon as BH became aware, they introduced boundaries and rules Tae and Jk had to adhere to. Which isn't all too weird, because in 'normal' situations companies would also probably tell their dating coworkers to act professional. I think Tae and Jk, as well as the other members, do want their privacy. Was the intent from Bighit to protect them? No, I think they just want to protect their company. You can tell that at times Jk and Tae did not like the way they were treated.

How do Jk and Tae feel about the boundaries and rules they had to live by? Probably very conflicted. I think rationally they probably understood, but emotionally it was very hard and different situations probably came with varying feelings. There's so much to consider. There's the band as a whole, they wouldn't have wanted to put the other members' future at risk, they also wouldn't have wanted to put their own future at risk (though at some points they might've wondered if things were worth it). Keeping their relationship safe and hidden, was the safest way for them to carry on professionally and privately. But, being young and in love calls for feelings that are so strong.. they must've felt very frustrated at not being able to show that. I think they also felt the rules and boundaries were too strict, prohibiting them from even acting as close friends. Having to watch other members be close with your partner (having a full blown other ship to take root) while not being able to do much themselves. I think it truly hurt them.

We see a lot of "Jk is trying to hide" stuff, and I do think Jk is a bit more carefull (of sharing friendships and bonds in general), but when all you've ever known is to hide your relationship, that's what has become your safe place. I do believe Jk doesn't like the shippers comemnts in his lives, and justly so. It's people asking for information they have no right to.

Mentioning Tae and Jk in one sentence always comes with some tension.

[canary0]

July 11th - Dracula 2023

The Personal Blog of Mina Murray

(A/N: Spoilers-ish for DD in August, sorta; there are deviations and similarities, but better safe than sorry if you want to avoid spoilers below the break.)

I’ve gotten some rest, spent some time with Jonathan, and had a chance to speak with the doctor. I’ll address each in turn, as they mostly flow into one another.

After visiting for a short while after I arrived last night, I had to rest elsewhere. It was difficult to sleep, knowing he was only a couple of blocks away. I went straight back in the early morning, and much to my gladness, he was awake. He still looked tired – infinitely tired, as if despite being safe, there was some weight he was still carrying around – and very thing and pale, but he smiled when he saw me and got up, carefully embracing me despite the IVs. He sat back down a few moments later and looked me over.

I noted that I had seen him wake up briefly last night, and that he had seemed unfocused. He told me, “I had a fever when I first arrived. I was somewhat aware you were there last night, but I thought I might have imagined you in how badly I wanted to see you.”

Despite the direness of the situation, that made me happy to hear, and I am glad he is doing well enough to stand, and his embrace has strength behind. As thin and exhausted as he looked, I worried. I assured him that I came as soon as I could after I got the call and packed. He said something odd, then – he mentioned that he was glad. It meant I was not in England. A very odd thing, as I would think after all this time, getting home would be a top priority. I asked him about it, and he said that, although Romania has, in most respects, been a kind and welcoming place to him, he wishes to be home. He is more concerned for me and our friends. He went silent when I asked why.

After a long while, he said that he wanted me to see for myself… to confirm what he’d seen from new eyes, in the light of day. He said there was a usb drive and a book of rail timetables in the lower cabinet of the side table, and that I should look through both. I promised him I would, and he gave the most wan smile I had ever seen on his face that was before full of determination.

I took the items in question out, but the doctor arrived before I could start perusing them. I rose to shake her hand, and I say with no exaggeration that I only came up to her shoulder, and I am not too short myself. She looked at Jonathan and I with the kindest eyes I had ever seen, though, and I couldn’t help but be put at ease. She first asked Jonathan how he was feeling that day while a nurse came in and drew some blood, and he responded that while he was tired, he was feeling a little better now. She gave a little laugh, and said, “No wonder, Mr. Harker. Good company brings comfort and healing, I think.” She flipped through his chart – printed, I noticed, rather than having a computer to access it near the bed.

She explained as kindly as she could that it’s impressive that he’s in as good a state as he is. Apparently his blood cell count in general is low, but recovering. The universal reduction in cells with normal plasma volume suggests to her that he was certainly in hypovolemic shock, or close to it, at some point in the recent past, some kind of serious blood loss. They couldn’t find any major wounds that would normally cause that, though. Jonathan’s expression was grim, and he simply nodded, letting her go on. She added that he came in with severe dehydration, exhaustion, and exposure, including cuts, scrapes, and bruises that would suggest someone who had traversed the wilderness unprepared. He nodded to that, too, but didn’t comment. She thinks he’ll be stable enough to head home in the next few days, though she emphasized how important making sure he gets plenty of iron, B vitamins, and vitamin C even after that, though, to support recovery from the lingering anemia. He should also be careful to protect himself from disease with the low white blood cell count – basically, pretend it’s still the pandemic for him. I was glad I had come in with a mask just in case.

She also mentioned that the hospital was approached for a DNA test. Apparently there were some disappearances near the town of Prundu Bârgăului, and they had recovered a few hairs from the scene, and there were reports matching Jonathan’s description. No fingerprints, though. I was shocked at the very idea, but Jonathan just grimly gave his permission to do any tests they needed. He didn’t seem surprised.

Eventually, she left, and I pulled Jonathan’s items out of them little cabinet. They were nearly the only things in there – I recognized the set of clothes that were in there, but there were no shoes and just the book and thumb drive. No phone, no computer, no charger or solar cells or his bag. Some old gold, though, which is an odd addition. I’m sure exploring what he wrote will shine light on everything today.

As I opened my laptop and plugged the thumb drive in, he took my hand and said, “Wilhelmina.” Ominous – he’s never called me by my full name almost since we met. “I wrote… a lot in there. My head’s turned around… I don’t know how much of it is real and how much is some wild fantasy I concocted to explain my experiences. Maybe the blood loss affected my mind. I’m tempted to ask you not to open it, to remain ignorant and allow me to remain so. But… I also value your insight. I think you might be able to determine the truth of it in a way I can’t. And I don’t want to conceal anything from you. So… please…”

I closed the laptop and kissed him. I told him, “Let’s wait out that test and get you home first. Give you some time to recover. I don’t like making you wait, but I think it might be easier if we do this together. It sounds like you’ve had a serious shock.”

He looked me in the eyes, and I couldn’t help but notice the dark circles under his. “Yes, that’s… yes.”

–

Thank god. The DNA results are back, and Jon wasn’t a match. Oddly, the local police seem to have left it at that. No one has mentioned coming in and taking statements. It’s like the DNA test was just confirming what they already thought – I wonder if Jon was never a real suspect?

Apparently the disappearances are just one of a long string, the three recent ones – two children, and the mother of one of them – are just the latest.

What’s going on out here?

(A/N: Oh man. With a modern combination of technology and attitude, this just couldn't be the same as August's stuff. Stuff's fresh in Jon's mind, and like I mentioned in another post, we're REALLY in the habit of sharing info these days. So much that it often doesn't occur to people not to.

It's also hard to imagine him keeping her in the dark for the reasons presented in the original book these days. It's not a 'woman heart so delicate' thing, but more of an 'I'm afraid to know and I know you'd have to tell me because it is important to share everything with each other' thing. That's part of why I love JonMina, but it just doesn't make sense these days.

Nor does the police totally doing nothing with multiple disappearances, but they're mostly just confirming that this is a Dracula thing. Dude's been feeding the ladies for a long-ass time, and this is undoubtedly just the latest thing. Most of the old-timers know he's out doing his thing, as I tried to establish early on.

These days I also didn't seem them getting married right as soon as they saw each other again. That also means cute wedding stuff at the Westenra place before The Horrors return.)

[angiethewitch]

God, that's absolutely awful about the shop. If the higher ups aren't going to be any help, is union interference an option?

I am part of the union but unfortunately they've decided we're doing what is in our job description and therefore they won't do anything to help. honestly they seem pretty good in some regards, like one of my fellow supervisors is severely disabled and the cold makes her disability flare up and management refused to fix the heating, so she went to the union and they got the heating fixed within a week so she could work more comfortably, but in most other ways they are the biggest waste of £10 a month ive spent in a while.

I think the only way I could light a fire under their arses is by disclosing the exact nature of my illness, and how the work environment affects me, but that would mean telling management im schizophrenic which im not comfortable with doing. ive heard many stories from a little online community im part of where people disclosed their illnesses and were fired a week or two later. one of them was a star employee and after 2 years he told his management that he was bipolar with severe psychotic episodes and he needed to reduce his hours slightly because he wasn't coping. 5 days later he was fired due to "cutting costs", but he's not stupid, he knows why he was sacked.

only one person on the management team knows im schizophrenic, my trainee assistant manager, but she's one of my closest friends outside of work so I trust her, and she doesn't have much sway in the company as a 21 year old woman trying to stand up to middle aged men. disclosing illnesses like schizophrenia has gotten people like me fired from jobs just because we're seen as, at best, unreliable, and at worst, a danger. I was basically forced out of my old job after I got diagnosed, my boss was an awful abusive woman and she got worse after she found out about my diagnosis, I eventually went mad from the stress and barrelled full force into a psychotic episode and quit and had to go on sick leave for 5 years.

tldr Union interference is an option but it would require me taking the risky decision to disclose my illness and im not prepared to take the consequences of that without an exit plan which I don't have right now. im just gonna keep my feelers out for a new job I think

[chapstickman]

“I just came from r/196” ask game

Saw another post. I think I should invite y'all to one of our longstanding traditions. Answer the questions then tag 10 (or more) people. I'll go first.

Name? Jarrod

Pronouns and gender? they/he, guy???

Sexuality? Pansecual

Country? USA MERICA FUCK YEAH🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅

Top 5 fandoms? hazbin/helluva, fnaf, team four trees two, i forgor the rest

What is your Most forbidden snack? fabuloso also chapstick

Would you pet a bug? scared scared scared of bugs. dont like them. scary scary.

Share a weird fact/story about yourself with the class. i love fixing things, no matter what it is. my silly little brain just latches onto it like a puzzle, which it kinda is. i can already fix most electronic devices, or alteast know how to (FUCK apple and their stupid fucking anti repair policy. thats actual fucking bullshit. i dont want to have to pay for a 200 dollar course and license to fix your shitty god damn phones. mac books and ipads are aight. but FUCK apple as a company. all this does is protect their silly little fucking income from their stupid ass fucking phones breaking all the fucking time. all it does is make it so that people who do fix phones for a living fucking cant, and no devices to fix means no food on the fucking table for them or their families. they're toying with peoples livelihoods for a bit of fucking profit.) if i dont know how to fix it (cars, microwaves, tvs, literally anything that could break) i want to learn

What does the color blue taste like? mmm yumby

What is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen? the ocean. it goes on forever. it doesnt stop. i didnt realize that until i saw it in person. it stopped me dead in my tracks.

What is the stupidest thing you've ever done? ive got this protein bar. in 2020 (my second year of marching band, freshman year) i was eating a box of them on the way to marching band camp. i lost one. this was in july. i found it on the ground still sealed in january of the following year. i still have it. im going to eat it my senior year at the end of the year band dinner. i have not done it yet. im going into my senior year. im going to do it. it will kill me. i will not regret it.

Stupidest thing you've seen/heard someone else do/say? a pastor for a church i used to attend (unfortunately hes my uncle) blamed crime and evil on transgender people

Hyperfixation song? long list. Starman David Bowie, banana man tally hall, mr white keys cherry poppin daddies, play that funky music wild cherry, cant take my eyes off you frankie valli, sh-boom the ink spots, the devil went down to georgia the charlie daniels band

Is there any meaning behind your profile picture and/or username? I've been asked several times where "Chapstick Man!" comes from. It comes from TF2. I named a rocket launcher "chapstick gun" with the description "ngl chapstick taste kinda good" and then i thought the joke was funny and it stuck. my name is now Chapstick Man on like everything. i have not been sued yet. Im too cool to be sued.

Dream career as a child? also electronics repair technician (i am answering these out of order)

Dream career as an adult? still kinda a child ig. but i want to be an electronics repair technician, running my own little computer/electronics repair shop. i already know how to do it, i just need a building and to be 18 (i turn 18 in december) and people to come and give me their stuff to fix. i love fixing things.

Thoughts on cilantro? its aight ig

Have you ever been banned from a location and if so, why? I havent. but i plan to be. i am going to be silly and they cannot prevent it.

What is your cursed food combination? I did my burgers in ketchup if i want ketchup, i did my biscuits in gravy for biscuits and gravy

Trans rights? are epic!!!!!!

@everyone im lazy

[weirdxonekimberlyx]

How do you make money as a diaper model, and do you think the same can be achieved by male diaper models

I got started reaching out to ABDL studios and online companies because, back when I got started it was difficult to find platforms to sell your content yourself. Now days there are SO many ways to do it yourself and get your content seen and sold without needing ONE specific buyer (like a company or studio) and, YES! I have encouraged other male ABDL's to get into modeling and several have gone on to do very well for themselves! My advice for Male ABDL's who want to make a living as a model: #1. Be aware and comfortable with men being your primary customers, I know a few bois who refuse the idea of selling content to other men, but, truth is, we still live in a world where woman are really looked down on for looking at p*rn, much less buying it. But, on that note I want to also say that, the "perverts" and the "creepers" buying p*rn? Yeah thats rare, 99% of the male clients who buy my content and interact with me are really awesome, easy going and great to work with. Dont let the societal idea that "only weirdo's buy p*rn!" scare you, you'll make some awesome friends! #2.Dont get discouraged when you begin. I see this in many newbies who get started, they often think that SW is "easy money" its only "easy" because you have control and can do it when you have the time, otherwise its STILL gonna take work and you are still going to have to market yourself. That means, being active on social media, talking to potential clients, reaching, If you seen my last post where I said "you get what you put into this" I really mean that, this is a career where you make equal what you put in, the more time you devote each day the more you'll get from it. dont feel discouraged to not get "famous" instantly, it takes time. Go look at your favorite models that are "famous" how often are they posting new content? how often are they on social media? how active are their pages? #3. i always suggest trying multiple platforms to sell on and drop the ones you dont enjoy and stick to the ones you do. #4. If you want to work alongside other models, you need to become a presence within the community. reach out to studios and ask about doing scenes, get tested, build friendships with other models but remember, that too takes time :) Male ABDL models can absolutely do more than many think and can absolutely go far! Go for it! dont feel discouraged! If you ever feel discouraged just remember When I got started I reached out to literally hundreds of studios and got turned down A LOT! Like, I actually had a p*rn studio once tell me to fuck off when I tried sending them some of my photos and they told me I wouldnt ever sell my work. (jokes on them, they went out of business a year later) Point being, I am happy where I am at and where ive been so far, despite the sites and studios that turned me down when I first got started.

[cathalbravecog]

one thing i've been trying to wrap my head around is: if hired help is still canon, but everything else relating to it is not then. what happened to the C.J?? does he just not exist? and for that matter where the heck Elvis? and does the witness stand-in still exist? idk is there a statement i'm missing?

IM TRYING TO WRAP MY HEAD AROUND THIS TOO!! was cj ever canon in ttcc now as of the recent things?? what about winston who mentions him? is that part of the lore gonna be changed or is it gonna be like "he did leave and he is canon, just not how the old comics showed it"

literally in the first panels of hired help break the law is mentioned by name and we see elvis' missing poster but in my opinion almost everything seems to be leading to the clash crew trying to move on from this story possibly?

they possibly didn't wanna edit things out from the comic but since litigation team is still there i guess that hired help is still canon, but to be taken with a grain of salt? like aside from a meeting of two minds we only have 2 cog lore comics that are still deemed as canon and a meeting of two minds is

i believe ther never was a statement about this, aside from the article that mentions the writing team working on a complete re-write for the main taskline and also just.. the story in general and acknowledging how hard to access it is now and how confusing things have gotten

unfortunately with that it's in an even more confusing state now, so honestly it's just... about the wait until any other statements are put out or until any writing updates are released! i wish this was communicated a bit better but again i understand the crew is busy with mix and match and hammerspace currently. still, wish this was communicated better. unless i too, have missed a discord statement...?

it's a bit of a nightmare right now trying to just. solve what's currently canon and what's not. like we know for sure what's visible in game right now with the managers and a meeting of two minds and at least the april toons thomas dialogue stuff is canon (though with this i'd assume some minor old stuff thomas talks about may be tweaked...? again i have a re-read in order)

but anything to do with break the law and diane joining the company and cj leaving is questionable currently. which is... very confusing seeing that it's mentioned several times in hired help. i kinda analyzed that comic for myself just yesterday . especially this stands out

atticus wing is literally mentioned by name here and also the whole affect it had on cog insurance companies (and courtney and barry) is mentioned too. aside from thomas i don't believe we ever saw the full effect that atticus' death had on the cog world which always rubbed me the wrong way, since it was supposed to be kinda a big deal and now it's being put under the rug. and yet atticus still haunts so many parts of the story after. so like

(i think about this a lot and a part of my hc's ive been working on would rewrite atticus' death to have a bit more of an impact, while explaining how exactly he died and couldn't be repaired, while cogs who've gone through worse literally in-game through gags are rebuilt and repaired. though i'd need to re-read and re-watch old things for that, it's been a while... plus i've never seen actual content from the events this took place in myself, i wasn't playing toontown at the time, not even ttr!) uaurgh well done character in an admittedly (yet passionately put together) somewhat messy story . again i need to say this each time i criticize this i love the work staff does but i think it's only fair i get to be honest with my thoughts on these things as a fan. we're all just people here y'know

current state? i dunno. still fun to speculate things though. apologies for my thoughts being scrambled and if i forgot things, i didn't mean this one to be so long

[sissytobitch10seconds]

You Are Unbreaking, Though Quaking, Though Crazy

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy Summary: Back where he's safe, Viktor must now face the hardest news he's ever gotten in his life. And he must do it dreadfully alone. Warnings: Mentions of possible miscarriage/child death, mentions of starvation, inaccurate medical procedures, and canon child neglect Word Count: 5,606 Ship(s): Viktor Hargreeves/Five Hargreeves

Archive link!

A/N: This is the second installment in this series but I don't think it's necessarily critical to read the first installment to know what's going on here. Hope you all enjoy! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

The next time that he woke up, he was back in the house surrounded by the familiar walls of the infirmary. He had found himself spending a lot of time there, both because his medication had made him a little accident prone and because he didn’t want to leave Five’s side whenever the other man came back from a mission sick. The room hadn’t changed from the last time that he had been in it. It still had the green walls with medical equipment hanging off of it, as well as the sheer white curtains that allowed in plenty of light while obscuring it enough to keep any of the patients inside from being overwhelmed by it. 

The bed that he was on had soft sheets and the mattress was just firm enough that he couldn’t shift and exacerbate any wounds that he might have had. The blanket on his lap was warm enough that he felt comfortable but not overly so, which was good. Recently, since he had gotten pregnant, he found that when he got overheated he also felt supremely ill. The next thing that he noticed was that he had a bit of tape on his face that was holding a tube to his cheek and an IV placed into the pack of his hand. 

He turned his head to the side and felt the tension that had been building up in his shoulders immediately leave. Five was sleeping in a bed similar to his. They were both in the traditional hospital beds, minus the buttons that called several different nurses instead replaced with one that would bring Grace to them. Five was set up much like Viktor was, with two pillows to hold his head propped up enough that Viktor could easily see him. He had his own heart rate monitor, IV, and a feeding tube as well. 

The pregnant man was immediately snapped back to the real world so that he wasn’t just watching his husband anymore when he heard some rustling coming from the other side of the bed. “Mom?” he asked as he turned to see who else was occupying this space. After half a decade with only each other for company, it was a little disconcerting to realize that it was possible for other beings to be around them without them knowing.

“Sorry, it’s just me,” Luther replied. He closed the book that he had been leafing through and then carefully looked at his brother. He had somehow gotten taller since the last time that they had seen each other, almost pushing seven feet. His hair was cropped close to his head like he had kept it his entire life, but it was beginning to grow out around the sides so that it was all the same length. He was wearing a comfortable pair of linen pants and t-shirt with a college name that Viktor’s tired brain almost recognized.

“What are you doing in here?” he asked, trying to ignore the sour way that his voice sounded after an unknown time of not using it.

The blond left the novel on the edge of Viktor’s bed as he walked down to the table that was pushed over the very end of the hospital bed. He took one of the cups and filled it up with the water that had been sitting in the pitcher next to it before he passed it to his brother. “Mom was really worried about you guys. I mean, we all were, so we wanted to take turns waiting with you both to make sure that nothing bad happened. I know we have alarms that go off when someone starts to take a turn for the worse but it helps us feel at ease if we have someone with human or robot ears and eyes present.”

“Right,” Viktor nodded as he tried to take in all of the information. He took the cup from Luther and then hesitantly brought it up to his lips. He took a couple of sips of the cool liquid before his body began to scream for more of it. The rest of the cup was empty in a second.

“Can I ask what happened?” Luther asked as he took the cup back and placed it next to all of the others. He carefully walked back to the chair that was between Viktor’s bed and the door, before he reached over the side of the hospital bed and pressed the button that would call for Grace. While Viktor seemed fully coherent and responsive, it was still a good idea for someone with actual medical knowledge to check him over.

“I… Can you tell me what the date is first?”

Luther nodded. He explained the date and time, pointing to the clock that was hanging over the door to give some proof that he wasn’t lying. Viktor felt his shoulders release the tension that they had been carrying and his exhausted body sunk back into the bed. It had been a background emotion, so he hadn’t necessarily been super aware of it, but the idea that they had landed in the wrong part of the timeline had been eating away at his stomach. “You guys have been out for about a week,” he then explained, which only served to soothe Viktor’s nerves more.

Grace bustled in before he could fulfill the other side of the deal and explain the ordeal that he and his husband had been through. That was probably for the best, because Viktor didn’t want to explain it more than he had to. The more people that were in the room when he did finally get around to doing that, the more likely they were to get the story straight when they explained it to other people.

“You’re awake! How are you feeling, my dear? Any aches and pains that I should know about?” Grace asked. She walked over to him and placed her hand on the edge of the monitor, which transferred all the information about Viktor’s vitals over the last half hour directly into her database so that she could make a decision.

“Tired, but that’s not really abnormal for me these days,” he replied softly as his hand drifted down to the swollen belly hiding away his child. He felt a shock of panic surge through his system as he realized that this was it, he was a couple of check ups away from finding out the status of his child. It was something that was exhilarating for most parents but was the scariest thought that Viktor had ever had.

Grace sat down on the edge of the bed and then brushed her hand over the side of his face. “Dear, would you please tell me about what you’ve been through? It’s going to help me assess how best to help you. And if I’m going to be a grandmother,” her eyes were almost sparkling. Viktor wasn’t sure if her programming had been upgraded while he was away or if she had just continued to evolve and change because of how advanced her technology was, but she was almost human.

He flushed and ducked his head down a little bit, but found that made his vision swim. He carefully righted himself and leaned back against the pillows that had been placed behind him on the bed. As soon as his head was no longer up in the air but resting, the spinning in hs brain and ears stopped entirely.

“A lot happened, Mom. Five and I were starving to death for almost five years. We barely had anything to eat or drink and most of what we had didn’t have a lot of the nutrients to keep us going. We managed the best we could with a garden and barely any seeds and the canned goods that were undamaged but it wasn’t much. It meant that we couldn’t use our powers as much as we should have been able to, which is why it took us so long to get back here,” Viktor began to explain. It was hard to relive the life that he had just been wading through, but he had to do it so that he could get the help he needed. He was sure the feeding tube was already helping him and the baby get the nutrients that they needed, but there still might have been more required.

“Our?” Luther asked, catching what Viktor had said about his powers.

That was going to be a lot harder to explain, especially to Reginald’s golden child, than the whole disappearance was. He sighed and let his eyes drift closed as he said, “It turns out that Dad put me on medication when we were little when he told you all that I got sick. It kept me in this kind of neutral state where I couldn’t have any reactions, except panic and fear despite the pills supposedly being for anxiety. He did it to lock my powers away because they’re affected by my emotions. I can turn sound into energy waves that do a lot of things. That’s how I helped Five get us back here, I used my powers to give him the extra jump he needed to bring us back in time.”

Grace looked a little it startled when it really sank in what her son was telling her. She, of course, had known about the medication that he had been on and what it was really for. Viktor was never supposed to find out, so now that he had for what seemed to be years, it was a bit of a shock to her. Her processor whirred as she tried to process everything that he had told her and then assess the toll that using his powers with no energy had taken on his body, as well as what it might have done to Five.

“Would Dad-” Luther stopped himself and pursed his lips. Something had happened in the half decade that they had been gone, Viktor immediately pieced together, to have made Reginald’s favorite turn against him.

“How long have you been off of your medication?” Grace asked as she brushed her mechanical fingers over the edge of his forehead to displace some of the hairs that had been hanging there.

He let out a small sigh. The longer that he was talking the more exhausted he was becoming, both because the recollection took a lot of energy that he didn’t have and because he was waiting in anticipation for the question he really didn’t want to be asked. “We knew that there was a chance we wouldn’t be able to find more of my medications. You would be surprised about how few pharmacies there are when the entire world is full of rubble,” he chuckled, though the others didn’t find it as amusing as he did. “We weened me off of the medication and rationed the bottle that I took when we ran away from the house. So I’ve been off of it entirely for about four years and six months. My body has long since adjusted to my powers, I’m not going to blow up the building or anything.”

“I know, dear,” Grace smiled softly. “Now I have one more question before I decide your course treatment and you can rest again. Are you pregnant?”

It was harder to say it out loud in front of Grace and Luther then it had been to poke and prod Five in the right direction. That may have been because he was now surrounded by the very equipment that could determine the health and viability of his pregnancy. One of his hands moved to the bottom of the swell on his stomach. It had seemed so big when they were back in the wasteland, like it was a huge blaring siren screaming about the little life inside of him. Now that they were back in the Academy, it felt tiny. “Yeah, I think I am,” he whispered.

Grace clapped her hands next to the side of her face, ever cheerful and optimistic. “I’m going to run some bloodwork and we’ll see what the results of that are before we put you through any procedures or get our hopes up too far, alright? I want you to rest in the meantime. I know that look, and it means that you’re overtired.”

He chuckled, a warm feeling blooming in the center of his chest. Even after all this time away from his mother, she still somehow knew him better than anyone ever had before. She slipped off of the bed and got the equipment that she needed to take the blood. Viktor leaned back against the pillows even further than he had before and slowly let his eyes drift shut until he had fallen asleep.

---

The next time that he woke up, he could hear the steady beating of his heart and Five’s next to him. It wasn’t like when he used his powers, but instead a mechanic noise coming form the monitors watching their vitals. It was a reassuring noise, to be able to hear the physical proof that his lover was not only alive but steadily recovering. 

He placed a hand on his stomach as he thought about the tiny life that he had been harboring there. He had no idea if they were still growing or if they were thriving like his husband was, but he had to cling onto the hope that they were. They had come so far and worked so hard to get to where they were that the idea of it coming crashing down because of a miscarriage or stillbirth made Viktor want to start crying.

A knock sounded on the door and jerked him out of his thoughts before he could spiral even further. He looked up to see who it was and then felt his nerves settle. He loved his siblings all equally, but there were some that he felt more comfortable around than others. Ben was that one, mostly because he and been a bit of a trio with Viktor and Five when they were younger. While Ben and Klaus were the closest out of all of them, he still had to go elsewhere to get the kind of literary discussions that he longed for.

“Hey, Mom just sent me up here to see if you were awake and wanted something to eat. She finished up lunch,” Ben explained, jerking his head down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen.

Food sounded like a risky thing, but at the same time Viktor’s body craved it like nothing else. He had experienced a couple of cravings so far in his pregnancy but nothing that he could get back when they were in the apocalypse. He also hadn’t experienced any foods that set off his morning sickness outside of the singular incident where he had thrown up his entire lunch into the side of the garden. He was a lot more sensitive to smells and tastes now, though.

“I think I could probably stomach something. Mom’s going to be able to avoid refeeding syndrome, right?” Viktor asked as he shifted on the bed.

Ben nodded, “Oh yeah. She knows all about how to ween you guys back onto a proper diet and help you get the nutrients that you need. That’s why you’ve got the feeding tubes. I’ll be back when I’ve gotten you something to eat, alright?”

The door slipped shut and Ben was gone, which left only Viktor and the steady sound of his husband’s heart. He didn’t have to wait long before his favorite brother returned with their mother. Grace set a tray down in front of him and then lowered a plate of food down in front of him. “Make sure that you eat slowly, you don’t want to shock your system,” she informed him. “When you’re finished with lunch we can check on the health of your baby, alright?”

He went a bit rigid at that. A shiver of fear brushed down his spine as though someone was dragging a feather along the tall ridges of his vertebrae. “I want Five to be there to see it too,” he replied as his eyes darted over to his husband. The aforementioned man had yet to rouse once from his slumber, at least at the same time as Viktor. The excuse that he had given was at least half real, because he did feel like it was important for his husband to be there when they heard their child’s heartbeat or saw them for the first time, but it was also a way for him to push off what he felt was the inevitable. He didn’t want to break the spell that they had found themselves in and end up back in the world of misery he had been living in for the last half decade.

“I’m afraid that we can’t wait that long. Your blood tests indicated that you were already into your second trimester, so it’s imperative that we figure out what’s going on with the little one and make up on all of the appointments and medications that you were unable to get while you were away,” Grace replied. She was using that firm motherly tone that she always did when one of them had done something that had upset her slightly. It was a tone that Viktor hadn’t gotten very often as a child because there hadn’t been a lot of mischief that he wanted to or even could get into.

He shrank back into the bed, his stomach now wound up in knots. He turned over to look at Five, wondering if there was something way that he could rouse his husband so that he didn’t have to live through this potential terror and trauma all on his own. They had been together from the moment that they had been adopted and then never separated since. Even when Five had been pulled away to go on missions, they had known that they were going to be reunited in the next couple of days. When they were in the wasteland, there had been long hours that stretched by without them sharing each other’s company, but then they were in each other’s arms again by nightfall.

“Eat something, V,” Ben said as he sat down on the chair that Luther had been positioned in earlier. He had a pen between his fingers and he was flipping it over his knuckles like he always did when he was trying to soothe his nerves.

“Right,” he nodded. He picked up his fork and tried to think about anything other than the health or life of his child as he brought the food up to his mouth.

“So I take it that’s still the first letter of your name?” Ben asked. “I know that you’re presenting differently than when you were here the last time.”

“I’m trans,” Viktor nodded. “He/him pronouns and I like the name Viktor. Do you remember when Mom helped us get all of our names?”

Ben grinned as he shifted on the bed, “Of course I do. We all made fun of Five for never being able to pick one, even years after the rest of us had chosen one. I was able to pick one pretty fast even if none of the traditional Korean names really felt like they fit me.”

“I remembered that I was from Russia but I didn’t have that huge list of names that Mom gave us for traditional names for our genders from our home countries, so I had to pick one that I thought sounded Russian enough to fit while also being actually male,” the pregnant man explained. He could already feel himself relaxing as he focused on something other than his child and what might be going on with them. It was just the distraction that he needed to be able to eat, as he didn’t even notice each bite of food that was disappearing from his plate outside of knowing that he liked the flavor.

Before he knew it, the entire plate had been divested of food and his stomach felt noticeably less painful. The anxiety returned full force when he remembered what was to come, however. He turned his head to the side so that he was staring at the unconscious form of his lover, almost trying to desperately will him awake. Viktor didn’t want to have to go through his alone, not when Five also deserved to hear the news about their child as soon as he could. That was what he had poured himself into for the last couple of months, he deserved to see what the outcome of all of his labors had been.

Grace smiled at him as she removed the tray and the plate from on top of Viktor’s lap. She placed them on the chair in the corner as Ben came to stand beside Viktor. He was on the side opposite to where the machine that Grace was going to use to check the health of the baby was, but he was standing in such a way that he wasn’t blocking Five. “I know I’m not as good as him, but I’ll be a stand in for a while. Just so that you have someone to hold your hand while the scary part happens. You’ll have good news to tell him, I’m sure of it.”

“How can you be sure of it?” Viktor mumbled. He looked down to where Grace was carefully moving the blanket off of his body and folding it up in his lap. She then adjusted the loose shirt that he had been changed into, most likely while she had been cleaning the soot and rainwater off of his skin. 

Finally, his belly was revealed to the world. Grace turned to warm up some of the lubricating gel that she would then place on his bump while Ben said, “I know because good things have to happen to us now. Dad is gone and he was the one that made all the bad happen.”

“It doesn’t feel like it,” Viktor shook his head. He turned his head away from the machine like that was somehow going to make the experience any less real. When he opened his eyes, he saw that Ben was looking back at him with a pleasant, reassuring smile. He took a deep breath as his brother guided him to do so, just as they had when they were children and Five hadn’t been around to soothe his panic attacks. 

“There you go, Vik,” Ben beamed. “Come on, look at what Mom has to show you and then you’ll have some wonderful news for your boyfriend when he finally wakes up.”

“Husband,” Viktor immediately corrected. “We didn’t have a marriage license or a witness or anything like that but we did get married after we turned eighteen,” he felt a small smile slip onto his face as he thought about it. Regardless of what the outcome of the scan ended up being, he was elated at the idea of being able to marry his husband and have it be recognized by other people. They might even get to throw a real wedding if their siblings would be willing to attend and help them celebrate.

“Right,” Ben nodded, taking every new bit of information with great stride. “You want to be able to tell your husband exactly what it was like when you saw your guys’ baby for the first time since he can’t do it. So look at the screen and everything will be okay.”

Viktor took a deep breath and then did as he was told to. He turned his head to the side so that he was no longer looking at his brother or husband and just stared straight ahead at the screen to see what the result was going to be. He could feel that his hands were beginning to shake as he moved them so that he was holding one of Ben’s and the other was clinging to the edge of the bed. 

He jumped a little bit when he felt the cool gel being placed on his stomach. Grace had warmed it so that it wasn’t as cold as the ultrasound had been the one time that he had to have one to make sure that his appendix wasn’t bursting when he was twelve, but it still felt almost like ice to him. His skin was still so unused to being able to feel temperatures since he kept his skin covered when they were in the wasteland outside of their homes. It was important to do that so that the ash and dust from the world around them wouldn’t burn them.

She then lowered the wand, which had also been covered with some gel to ease the glide during the examination. She started at the bottom of his stomach and then rolled back and forth to evenly spread out the lubrication so that she could look properly. She hummed to herself as she did it, the lullaby that she always sung to them when they had nightmares and were still allowed to go to her for comfort.

It did the trick and he immediately felt some of the stress and tension release from him. He stared at the shapes on the screen, trying to make anything out of the blobs of static to catch the first glimpse of his baby before she had the chance to point them out to him. Something that he hadn’t been expecting, especially since his last ultrasound had been to check for internal organ damage, was for the baby to come into crisp, clear view immediately when she found them.

Blackness surrounded the tiny infant, most likely the water from the amniotic sac. The baby was the same hazy black and white that the rest of the ultrasound had been, with one little hand clearly held up to something that looked like a nose and a mouth. “There they are, Viktor,” Grace beamed as she held one of her elegant fingers up to the ultrasound machine where the baby was very clearly defined. 

The breath had been stolen from his lungs as soon as he saw the outline of the child that he was carrying. When he had been wandering around the halls of the Umbrella Academy, lost and alone and afraid, he had read books where people had become parents. They had always described it as being terrifying and the most wondrous thing that had ever happened to them. He was ten when he began to dream of himself as a parent and a husband, something to soothe the ache on his heart from not being properly accepted as a member of the team his entire life. He had wanted it so desperately that he had convinced Five to enter into a ‘marriage’ just for him and now he was bringing forth their first child.

“Are they alive?” he asked, still heaving in breath around the sobs that were wrecking from his throat. The image on the screen had become blurry and his face damp with tears as his body became too overwhelmed with emotion to be able to handle everything happening. He had wanted this for so long and now he was finally able to see the potential that the future had in store for him. What he had dreamed of was finally in his grasp and yet so dreadfully, terrifyingly far away from him.

“Well, let’s see if we can find a heartbeat. The fetus looks to be about seventeen weeks along so there should be a nice strong one,” Grace explained. She reached over to the machine and flipped a few switches before she tilted the angle of the wand just a little bit. She shifted it around on his stomach and pressed a little harder than she had before so that the waves had a chance to pick up on what they needed to.

The room was overwhelmed with a whooshing-thumping noise coming from the machine to Viktor’s left, which joined the noise of the mechanical beating of Five and his own hearts on the right. He didn’t know what he was hearing at first until Ben’s grip on his hand tightened and Grace turned to him with a beaming smile.

“That’s your baby’s heartbeat, my dear! They’re alive and doing very well in there,” she explained.

That was all he needed to hear before it felt like he couldn’t handle any more information. Grace seemed to understand that the entire situation was very overwhelming, so she moved the wand back and placed it by the machine as she reached for some tissues so that he could clean off of his face. He knew that the exam wasn’t over and they would have to check over as much of the baby as they could once he had calmed down, but his emotions had grown to be too much to keep inside.

He sucked in enough air that he swallowed most of it, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. The sobs that wracked through his body were enough to make him shiver while the fear hormones released from where they had been stored while he was nervously awaiting the result. His heart was thrumming up in his ears and his body was focusing on repeating the sound of his infant’s heartbeat over and over again. It was the only thought that he could focus on, reassuring himself after nights spent worrying that the life he was carrying inside of him was already dead before their first breath.

Eventually, the tears slowed and he was able to lean back on the bed again. He had never once let go of Ben’s hand, desperately clinging to the solid warmth of another person despite wishing that it was his husband and not his brother. 

Viktor mopped off his face with the tissues that Grace had been steadily handing him during his crying fit. He sniffled and laughed a little as he turned to look at the frozen image on the screen. He could see the outline of the baby hidden protectively inside of his womb, safe from the world and all of the dangers that came with being alive. “Sorry for all the dramatics,” he apologized. He then handed the pile of tissues that he had collected over to his mother so that she could dispose of them properly.

“You’ve got nothing to apologize for, Viktor,” Ben shook his head. “You had a lot on your plate for a very long time and you just got some really good news, so I think that you deserve to have a cry. But at least you have something wonderful to tell Five when he finally wakes up.”

Viktor felt a smile stretch across his face for what had to be the first time since they had come back from the apocalypse. He had moments of joy when they were stuck in the wasteland, usually when Five was doing something silly to lighten the mood or when they found something particularly good among the rubble. He had never allowed himself to feel true happiness, no moment of joy could stretch on for that long when they were constantly reminded of the death and destruction around them. But he was back in the past where he belonged, so he was allowing himself to get excited about the prospect of becoming a father like he had always wanted to.

“Are you ready for me to finish the exam now, Viktor?” Grace asked, her voice calm and patient as always.

The aforementioned man took in a deep breath as he situated himself on the bed once more. The gel on his stomach was cool, spread all the way across his belly so that she could get a good look at the baby from every single angle. He had the grounding feeling of the soft blanket on his legs and Ben’s hand clenched in his. “Now that I know they’re alive, I don’t think there’s a single thing that could shock me about this exam.”

“Not even a tail? Or a third arm?” Ben asked, a teasing smirk spreading over her face.

“While it is possible that your children may be born with superpowers like you were, it is unlikely that such an anomaly would happen to our dear Viktor,” Grace chided playfully. She placed the probe back where it belonged and then began to run it back and forth as she had the first time. She found the baby again and began to show Viktor every little detail of the infant. He got to see all of the little fingers and toes that were available in the monitor, and she also pointed out where the placenta was. It was a relief to hear that he didn’t have to worry about something that hadn’t even occurred to him as the placenta wasn’t anywhere near the cervix, so he would be able to deliver naturally if he had healed enough to have the energy for that in the next several months.

“It’s such a relief to know that they’re okay,” Viktor breathed out a sigh of relief. He looked down at the bump protruding between his hips like he would be able to see his unborn child more that way than he was from the screen that held the ultrasound. “You’re gonna be okay, baby, you hear me? We’re gonna be a happy family just like I always wanted.”