#Like at no point is that a Role she tries on

[lani-heart]

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genre(s) -> angst, fluff, smut, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> ( eventually ) ATEEZ x reader warning(s) -> mentions of violence, mention of putting down / death, etc. words -> 2.4K

abstract -> “I hope we can get along” 

y/n's perspective

San has been spending more time with me to try to remember. He’s refused to actually spend time alone in his room but also refused to go out with me. I had to go to the hospital for a change in my bandages but recently Yeosang and Wooyoung have been very adamant on bringing one of them with me. I couldn’t do that however, since I needed someone to look over San. 

I saw this as an opportunity to patch things up with Hongjoong. He’s been trying to find his place here but when he tries, he ultimately fails. 

He was firstly banned from the kitchen and Seonghwa refuses to have him help him clean saying he’s clumsy. Yeosang and San never really assigned themselves roles except when Yeosang chose what I wear. 

Hongjoong felt that he was out of place even though he had been helping… quite a lot with San. He couldn’t match his strength but did help hold him down when he turned… aggressive. San has been having night terrors of his past in the fighters ring, luckily however he hasn’t turned aggressive on any of us. 

I’ll mostly however just have San with me as I write my novel revamped like old times. 

“I don’t want you to go,” he said as he gripped my waist firmly and I sighed. “Sannie, I have to but I'll be back soon okay? Do… you want me to bring you anything?” I asked and he shook his head. 

“Just come back” he muttered and I smiled. “I always do,” I said and he nodded. “I know, '' he muttered and I knew his memories were there… they just confused him. He says that he knows that he attacked me, he remembers it clearly and he’s starting to remember his time in the kennel and meeting Wooyoung.

I left my room in hopes of getting to see Hongjoong. 

“y/n… are you leaving already?” Wooyoung asked? I nod as I notice his worried look. “Yeah, but it should be fine, don’t worry–” “You should take Wooyoung with you” Yeosang cut me off and I smiled softly. “You know he doesn’t like places like that… besides the doctor doesn’t allow hybrids inside and I’d rather not trigger an attack or episode,” I said while smiling at Wooyoung. He looked upset but I didn’t want to jeopardize his mental health. 

“I’ll go with you,” Yeosang said and I shook my head. “I need you to help with San,” I said and he sighed. “Can I go?” I heard and I saw Seonghwa. “He’s scared of hospitals… especially doctors,” Hongjoong said while getting hit by Seonghwa for catching his lie. 

“Then why don’t you come with me?” I asked Hongjoong and he looked at me confused and shocked. “He’s the one who–” “Yeosang… second chances remember?” I asked and his eyes widened slightly before looking away. “I’m ready when you are Hongjoong!” 

hongjoong’s perspective

I don't understand why she wanted me to go? I get that she needed the canine hybrids to help with San and his disturbed memory. However, I couldn’t let Seonghwa go knowing he had a fear of doctors and hospitals… he would’ve been panicked and upset. 

But why would she trust me?

The walk was silent… I made sure to keep an eye on her and she only walked with a smile on her face. Why? When we made it to the hospital I was glared at by the paramedic who saved her… he was her friend I believe. 

“y/n!” he said happily and I saw that her face had a smile to see the man. 

“I can see you chose to trust the tiger that caused these wounds,” he said while pointing at her bandaged jaw… I didn’t want to show him how I felt but I also couldn’t help but look at the ground. Why was I even here?

“This is Hongjoong… and it's okay, everything was a misunderstanding on both our parts,” she said and I sighed, "How was she so forgiving? “Well maybe you should have Kun do special training with him like he did with Yeosang '' he suggested… 

Yeosang did special training?

“Here, just sign in and I'll tell the doctor you’ve arrived,” he said as he left and she started answering some questionnaire he gave her… I didn’t notice how lost in my thoughts I was when I heard her ask me

“Are you okay?” she asked while I nodded not wanting to worry her. “I noticed you aren’t bad with others… you just have a lot of mistrust,” she said and I sighed. 

“You don’t have to be scared of anyone,” she assured and I didn’t want to accept that. 

“What did he mean?” I asked and she looked at me confused. “Yeosang? He did training?” I asked and she nodded. “He had many behaviors that he had trouble with stopping. It was mainly because of his training by his old owner it was hard to override it,” she said and I understood what she meant. 

“Would it help me?” I asked and she shook her head with a comforting smile. “It's the same reason why San isn’t doing any training… you can’t be around strangers and Kun won’t risk that” she said and I knew that it was a reasonable explanation. 

“Hongjoong I know you’re sorry… you don’t have to try so hard you know? I didn’t give you any reason to trust me and you were a hybrid who just escaped hell. We both didn’t make an effort.” she said and I shook my head. That was my fault… I made her doubt herself. 

“Do you know what you ripped that day?” She asked and I felt my body freeze… I knew it was some draft of a book she was writing… all I read was that it was named Circus. It angered me to think I inspired some fictional story for others to enjoy… based on my life of suffering.

“There's this character named Jum… he’s a lion hybrid. I first started with circus being a hybrid story of two hybrids who were mistreated and how they’d end up dead because of the hands of their ring leader–” she explained and it did remind me of the actual circus 

“–but then I added another hybrid and now it's gone. It originally was gonna end sadly. I restarted my story however, I added two more hybrids wanting to make almost a rebellion-type story” she explained…

A rebellion?

“The hybrids will end up escaping and defying society. Government laws will purge themselves and ultimately become an apocalypse-type end” she spoiled and I almost liked the sound of that. 

“Jum is inspired by you,” she said and I was shocked… just how did she see me? “He’s a lion hybrid… star of the show. He’s gonna lead the other hybrids to escape,” she said with a smile and I was shocked she’d give me such a big role in her book. 

“You’re the protagonist… it used to be San in my other version. But you naturally lead so I thought it was better to be inspired by you” she said and I smiled softly… It made me feel happy that she saw me that way and not in a bad way.

“y/n?” I heard as I saw the nurse call her. “They don’t let hybrids in so you can wait. Here and don’t rip it to shreds this time” she joked as he handed me a draft…

Hybrids, an experiment gone wrong. Human hybrids of animal counterparts. Animals but also humans. Considered disgusting creatures morally disgraceful.  Below Humans… until they decided to embrace their animalistic counterparts. Seen as pets, attractions, objects.  Standing in front of a stadium of people doing dangerous tricks that a normal person would never dream of doing… only to be cheered for almost dying.  To do degrading acts against our will… “Jum!” I heard as I saw the ringleader command me to behind the curtains… where I'd be stuck in a cage rotting for the rest of my life…  “You’ll be sharing a cage from now on,” a clown said as he pushed me into the cage where I saw the leopard hybrid. “Hello… I'm Si-woo” he introduced. He looked scared… confused as to what was happening.  “Where do you come from?” I asked curious as to who I would be performing with from now on and sharing a cage with. “My owner sold me. She decided I was too old to keep so she sold me to the man in charge,” he explained making me scoff.  Age, Species, and Appearance were important for humans when it came to hybrid collecting. “How long have you been here?” he asked softly. “All my life” I answered. “HEY! WATCH IT!!” I heard as I saw them now put a black and tabby cat hybrid in a cage. The black hybrid thrashing around in protective equipment. “Make sure that black cat gets punished later” I heard and I sighed. New recruits… I wonder how long they’ll last.  “Yong calm down! They’ll kill you if you continue behaving this way” the tabby cat softly said. “Tch! Don’t you get it Kyong! We’re gonna die here!” he yelled.  “What?” Si-woo said and the cats now looked at us.  “What? Did you assume you're here to learn tricks? They’ll use us until we’re dead.” Yong said and I agreed. “We can’t stay here! I-I don’t wanna die!” Si-woo yelled and I sighed. “As long as you behave, you won’t die” I heard a familiar voice.  Yeong was the only hybrid allowed outside. He was one of the popular acts with the magician… and is considered the best-behaved hybrid here.  “HEY! You can get us out!” Kyong exclaimed… how naive was he? “And risk my life for you? No way” he said and the hybrids physically deflated.  “Jum, you know the rules” the rabbit warned and I rolled my eyes. “Don’t you wanna leave?” Si-woo asked and the hybrid scoffed. “Where would I go? I would be adopted just to get mistreated there? I’d rather be here and play human than out there” he said and the cats glared.  Outside wasn’t safe… not until hybrid laws were outlawed. “So we live here? Until we die?” Si-woo muttered. “It’ll only last a few years if you're lucky,” Yeong said while looking at the ground. He was a hybrid in charge of the rules… played human but I could see the guilt in his eyes when a hybrid died. “If you’re lucky it’ll be painless,” I said and I knew this wasn’t right… but what could I possibly do? It's not like I could start a movem– 

“All done!” I heard as I looked up to see y/n. She had a change of bandages but otherwise looked fine. “Do you think it’s okay for now?” she asked and I couldn’t help but feel shocked. 

How did I judge her so wrong?

“Hongjoong?” she said and I smiled softly while handing her the story with shaky hands. “I’d love to read it some more,” I said and she smiled brightly. “Maybe you can help me!” she said as we started walking out of the hospital when I saw a boy probably her age maybe even younger?

“y/n!” he said happily while smiling almost like a samoyed dog hybrid would… “Jeno! How are you? I hope Johnny isn’t working you too hard” she said and he chuckled. “No… not yet anyway. And you?” he asked and she smiled. “Working but so far everything is okay,” she said and he nodded while staring at me cautiously… 

I knew they all looked at me as a threat… they also looked at the panther the same way as well as even the Doberman

“Make sure to be safe. There's been pickpockets… a lot of people have lost their wallets,” he said and I scoffed… pathetic.

“Huh?! I lost cash, probably two hundred dollars worth” she said and I was shocked… usually someone was with her so how did they manage to steal from her?

“Most people lost their entire wallets,” he said and I scoffed… I wouldn’t allow them to steal from her again.

“I will, I have Hongjoong with me! He’s probably the most intimidating besides San” she said and the boy nodded. “Be careful… and no more emergency room visits” he scolded as they said their goodbyes.

“Don’t go too far” I said as I grabbed the back of her shirt to be closer and she chuckled. “Don’t worry too much! The only times I've lost money were when I was alone” she said and I nodded. “I need to protect you” I confessed and she smiled. 

“No you don't–” “I do… it's the least I can do for you. I’m not good at other things. I can’t cook like Wooyoung or Seonghwa, I just end up making more of a mess when I try to clean–” “You don’t have to be… just as long as you're happy” she said cutting me off with a genuine smile and I felt my tail wag slowly… something it hasn’t done I think ever. 

“I will protect you… no matter what you say” I vowed and she smiled. “Thank you, Hongjoong,” she said and I nodded. That would be my purpose… protect her. 

We walked in a peaceful silence when I noticed a tall man looking at her… he smelt like a dog hybrid. He looked at me as he panicked and hid…

A hybrid was the pickpocket.

I soon saw another big hybrid come out and point at her but before I could growl at them—

“Hongjoong… I hope you’re happy by the way. I don’t want you to hate me… not hate anyone from the apartment even if you don’t consider it your home” she said and I sighed. I didn't at first… I hated you, thought you were another hybrid collector, another consumer who’d enjoy the stupid two-hour show of the circus. 

“I really do… I like my new home and I’ll do anything to protect it even if that means going against my own species” I said while looking up at the two hybrids… though I knew it wouldn’t make sense to her. 

“I just hope you don’t feel like the beginning where you hated me” she said softly and I smiled. 

“I don’t think I could hate you… I was wrong about you so let’s just go home”

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[gglitch1dd]

Us & You Pt4

DILF Kirishima Eijirou x Teacher Reader

Context: Kirishima Eijiro has done everything to forget Bakugou Katsuki in his life and just focus on his daughter, his amazing and loving daughter. The light of his eye. Due to an incident, Eijiro meets you, a teacher at his daughter school who he can’t help but fall for. However, as his daughter grows older and questions start being asked, it feels like the peace he tried to cultivate is slipping through his fingers.

Note: Pretty chilled chapter.

PLEASE NOTE BEFORE READING THIS SHORT SERIES: There will be some deep discussions about morality, children, abortion arguments pertaining to Pro life vs Pro choice as well as the father’s role in raising a child/conceiving a child. It also deals with the struggles of being a single parent. It’s very messy and very much real life. Katsuki is Trans in this story (mostly cause I couldn’t find another character to be Sachiko’s mom and you’ll see why).

[PART 2] [AO3 Link] [PART 3]

The charity derby was in full swing with people wearing brands so expensive that you didn’t know the names of, crowded around you, sipping on fancy bubbly drinks walking around in the sun before the derby would take place. You stayed glued to Eijiro’s side as he led you and Sachiko forward. This was a very important day for you and you tried not to get too nervous at the realisation of that.

Today was not only the day that Eijiro would be out with you with people he knew closely outside of work, but also the day you would meet his family. You found that rather nerve wrecking. Sachiko had told you about how nice her family was and how they were all basically like each other so if you met Sachiko and Eijiro, you’d get along with everyone. However, you weren’t entirely sure if that was true considering she was their family.

You tried your best to stay calm. You kept a smile on your face as you held onto Eijiro’s arm, wearing an outfit that he had bought you for the occasion (along with several others which you found unnecessary but he was rather insistent of having an excuse to spoil you).

“Daddy, daddy, daddy look!” Sachiko pointed to one of the large deep mahogany horses that were being led on the other side of the fence by a worker. “It’s a thoroughbred horse! Look at how strong he is.” She pointed over at the horse. “Can we bet on that one!”

Eijiro chuckled. “We’ll take a look at all the horses participating and see. What if Thunder is participating?”

Sachiko gasped before turning to you with bright eyes. “Thunder is a horse Daddy and I have been betting on for the past two years now!” She informed you. “He’s really good. I like him.”

You smiled. “Well we better go check if he’s participating today. You think he can still make it?”

She nodded her head raising her head. “I think so. He’s a strong one, but not as strong as my Clyde.” She stated proudly.

You looked to Eijiro with a confused look and a raised eyebrow. “Clyde is her horse. Ironically, he’s a Clydesdale. My father bought him for her.”

“And he’s the best boy ever!” Sachiko exclaimed as she looked around. “Hey, Daddy…” Sachiko furrowed her eyebrows as she swivelled her head left and right. “Where’s Baba?”

“Right behind you, sweetheart.”

Sachiko turned around and she lit up like a Christmas tree. “BABA!” She let out an excited squeal and raced into the arms of a large man. He let out a loud boisterous laugh as he pick up Sachi effortlessly and threw her up into the air. He caught her in his arms and kissed her face, keeping her giggling.

Your eyes widened in shock at the man in front of you. Standing there was a man who was the splitting image of your boyfriend. Albeit he looked older, with crows feet at his eyes showing how much he laughed and grey strands at the side of his head mixing in with deep black that made him look even more handsome. He looked just like your Eijiro. Just older.

He held up Sachiko with one arm like it was nothing as he looked up at her with a broad smile. “There’s my girl.” He said, adoringly as he stared up at her as if she was an actual angel. “How are you, my little star?”

Sachiko smiled. “I’m good, Baba.” She turned to look down to a shorter woman at the man’s side. “Morning, grandma!”

The older looking woman let out a soft chuckle. She had deep red hair that had strands of grey in it as well. She had the warmest pair of golden hazel eyes you had ever seen, with a gentle loving smile on her face. She was dressed chic too, in a pretty dress. She reached up and put a hand to Sachiko’s face. “Morning, Sachi.”

“I missed you, two so much!”

“I missed you too.” He assured her. “Blame your father, he’s always trying to hoard you away from me.”

That made Eijiro pause with an offended look on his face, which made you giggle. Before he could speak on that fact, Sachiko spoke instead. “Baba,” She then looked to you. “This is Ms Y/N. She’s daddy’s girlfriend.” She claimed boldly with a proud smile almost as if she was the one who orchestrated this whole debacle.

Eyes went to you, the couple assessing you for a moment once their granddaughter had pointed you out. You glanced at Eijiro. He gave you a supportive smile, giving your hand a comforting squeeze. You turned back to the two of them. You gave them a smile and bowed in front of them respectfully. “Good morning. My name is L/N Y/N, it’s an honour to meet you both.”

First was Eijiro’s mom to let out an impressed hum. She smiled. “It’s nice to meet you too, dear. I’m Kirishima Yua, and this big man over here,” She motioned to her right to the large man. “Is my husband, Kirishima Takeo.”

Takeo gave you a bit of a dead stare as he assessed you, making you feel as if you were under a microscope. He then smiled, and slowly that smile turned into a smirk. “So you’re the person my son has been obsessing over.” He let out amusedly.

Eijiro let out a cough as he glared at his father. “Dad.”

Takeo shrugged, making Sachi giggle. “I’m not lying.” He stated plainly. He looked back to you. “It’s nice to meet you, pumpkin.”

You looked to him and then to Eijiro. You looked between the two of them, trying to spot the differences. “Your son never told me he looked so much like you.”

“You never asked.” Eijiro stated with a fold of his arms.

Takeo let out a loud laugh, lifting up Sachiko and putting her up on his large broad shoulders making her giggle. “Yep, my only boy and my twin. Good thing he’s as handsome as his old man.” He boldly claimed with a broad grin on his face, making you giggle.

Yua rolled her eyes with a swat to his arm. “Don’t mind Takeo, all our children look like him. Kirishima genes are strong.”

“I can see it with Eijiro and Sachi.” You stated as you found a place beside her.

Eijiro nodded his head proudly, like Sachiko had done not too long ago. “Damn right.” He said.

Sachiko looked down at her grandfather, holding onto his head. “Where are we going?”

“To take you to say hi to your cousins and aunts. Then we can go betting.” Takeo revealed to her. She let out a celebratory ‘yes’ making him chuckle.

You watched quietly as Eijiro said hi to his parents and Sachiko sat talking to her grandfather, holding onto her grandfather’s hair. She waved her legs forward and back as she sat on his shoulders. You eventually met their very large family. There were so many of them and they all looked so much like each other. They were very much like each other and very warm and open hearted.

You had seen Akari again and met her sons and saw pictures of her newborn daughter. You were surprised to meet Akari’s identical twin, Ayah, who was a paediatrician. Considering today was a family day at the Derby, you got to meet a lot of them and heard that it wasn’t even all of them.

You held Sachiko’s hand as you, Takeo and Sachi moved to check one of the booths that stated which horses to bet on. You had a hat on your head, blocking out the sun from your face and on your head. The three of you finally reached the overhead shade of the booth but then Sachiko stopped.

You looked down to the girl who raced to hide behind you. She gasped as she tried not to be seen. You raised an eyebrow looking back at her and so did Takeo. He tilted his head. Sachiko ducked back. “Oh no.”

“What’s up Sachi?” You asked her, putting a hand on her head.

Sachiko looked up at you and then looked forward. “It’s Asahi.” She whispered up to you.

You looked forward to see a brunette boy in a wheelchair. He had a bright smile as he looked up at his father with gleaming green eyes and dimples on his face. He had freckles littered all over his cheeks. Your eyebrows raised. You knew that boy. He was in your maths class in a year above Sachiko. He perked up, turning to look at the three of you before smiling broadly. “Miss Y/N!” He waved a hand over to you as he turned himself around.

You chuckled as you smiled over to him, the three of you moving forward. “Hey there, Asahi.”

“Morning Miss Y/N. It’s so good to see you.” Asahi looked up to Takeo. “It’s great to see you too, Kirishima-san.”

Takeo chuckled as he ruffled the boy’s curly hair. “It’s good to see you, Asahi. You’re looking stronger.” He praised.

Asahi sent up one of his dimpled smiles. “I’ve been practising in the pool. My physio said I’m getting better and faster. Isn’t that right, dad?” He turned to loop up at the tall green haired man behind him.

“That’s right, buddy.” He praised before looking at you. He lifted up his dark sunglasses to reveal the same captivating emerald eyes. A smirk went to his face, a dimple in his right cheek. “Midoriya Izuku, tech-multi-millionaire genius philanthropist, or Asahi’s father.” He introduced himself confidently making you chuckle.

You raised an eyebrow. “Oh so which one is it?”

Midoriya smirked, his eyes looking you up and down quickly before settling on your eyes once more. “It can be anything you want it to be.”

You put a hand to your chest and bowed. “Forgive me. I’m Ms L/N Y/N, I teach your son maths.” You informed him, making his eyebrow twitch up.

“Sorry I missed school on Thursday and Friday, Ms Y/N.” He apologised with a bow of his head. “I was at the hospital, but I’m alright now. I promise I’ll finish all my work by Monday.”

You crouched down closer to him with a smile. “It’s no problem, Asahi. I know your trying to stand on your own two feet so it’s no problem at all. I just don’t want you falling behind, okay?” You pinched his cheek making a soft pink blush go to his face. His eyes widened and he nodded his head sincerely.

Izuku was quiet for a moment before turning to Takeo. “Girlfriend?” He asked inquisitively.

Takeo chuckled as he shook his head, folding his arms. “Nope. Eijiro’s.” Izuku hummed as he nodded his head looking back at you.

Asahi looking around you before looking back up at you. “Excuse me, Miss but did Sachiko come to today’s derby?” He asked.

You opened your mouth to reply when you realised that Sachiko wasn’t behind you. You furrowed your eyebrows as you slowly stood up looking around for the girl in a crimson red dress with short black hair. “Sachi?” You asked confused. Immediately Takeo looked around as well, noticing that the girl had disappeared as well. “Where is she? She was just here… Sachi!” You turned around trying to find her.

Eijiro trusted you with his daughter, he trusts you with Sachiko because he knew that Sachiko would be safe with you. And now you couldn’t even find her. How could you lose her? She was an eleven year old girl, Lord knows what could happen to her on her own.

You felt your breathing rapidly increase in fear as your heart started to beat out of your chest. You looked around. “Y/N… Y/N… Y/N.” Takeo took you by your shoulders, making you pause. He saw you start to panic, your hands together. Takeo had his back towards the Midoriya’s keeping your panic out of sight from Asahi. “Honey, breathe. Keep your eyes on me. Breathe for me. In…” You kept your eyes up on his ruby eyes, and took a deep breath. “And out…” You let out a breath. “Good girl.” You felt a warm hand on your face making you breath out again. Takeo smiled down at you, the large man calming you down as despite the fact that it was his granddaughter that was missing. “How about you and me go find her, okay?”

“We'll look as well.” Izuku stated with a nod of his head before looking down at Asahi. “Right, buddy?”

Asahi nodded his head fiercely with a smile on his face. He put his hands on his push rings. “Don't worry, Ms Y/N and Kirishima-san.”

Izuku hummed as Asahi began to push himself forward. He kept a careful eye on his son, not entirely worried. “You okay?”

“Yep.” Asahi voiced, wanting to push himself.

You kept a smile on your face, wiping at your eyes with a sigh. “I'm sorry. That wasn't very professional of me.”

Takeo shook his head as he took out a handkerchief his wife made him and handed it over to you. “No, it’s okay sweetheart. You are allowed to feel, it’s normal.” He reminded you as you wiped at your eyes. You handed back the handkerchief and smiled. Takeo offered his arm to you with a smile. “Come on, lets take a walk around. We can even talk, just you and I.”

You nodded your head as you held onto his large arm, the warmth of his skin going through the shirt he was wearing. You held onto him as Takeo led you along, his tall frame towered over you as you walked side by side.

“You and Eijiro met at Sachi's school?”

“Yes,” You responded. “Eijiro had been called to school due to an incident that happened concerning Sachiko and another learner. However, we only started talking a month later when we met again after school at a PA meeting.”

Takeo nodded his head, digesting that piece of information. “Does he treat you right?”

You were surprised to hear such a question from him. It was an odd thing that he was thinking about you when it was his son that was still in the equation. You felt a flush up your face but nodded. “Yes. He really does. A bit more than I deserve, if I were honest with you.” You expressed with a scratch to the back of your neck. “He spoils me too much. I honestly feel so bad for how much he does for me. I don't feel like I'm reciprocating in return.”

Takeo frowned as he looked down at you but less in anger and more in slight worry. The older man had a caring but strict way about him. It was almost strange. He was so large, domineering even, and clearly much more experienced in life than you but he never come off as condescending. “It's a man's job to take care of you, sweetheart. You shouldn't feel the need to take care of yourself. You deserve to be pampered, spoiled and respected. Relationships are like that. A man wouldn't feel the need to make your life easier if you didn't make being in a relationship with him worth it. Which means you make your relationship worth it.” He explained to you. You looked up at him, all your attention on him as you nodded to his words as he looked deep into your eyes so intently. “Tell me, Y/N… how do you feel about my son?”

The question was another one that had you shocked. You weren't entirely sure what to say but you knew that you couldn't think about the answer forever either. So you said the first thing that came out of your head. “Warm.” It was Takeo's turn to look surprised. You thought about it some more but you were sure about it now. You nodded your head. “Yes… I feel warm. He makes me feel warm and safe, but I also feel complimented when I'm with him. Not that I feel good about myself but that we compliment each other. He's silly, loud and snores sometimes, but he's loving and caring. His heart is so full and yet so scared. I love him. I really do and I pray that we can stand a lifetime.” You attempted to explain your feelings to Takeo.

Takeo was silent for a moment before looking forward as you walked past people. “My son is a sensitive thing. He's always been sensitive. More so than a lot of his sisters. He was always the first to shed a tear when he was younger, and his feelings were so intense and big often than not they confused me. But that's what makes him Eijiro. He's delicate but strong in his own way, even if he needs help some of the time.  I see how he looks at you, and I see and hear how much he loves you. I think you're good for my son.”

At that, you turn to look at him in surprise. “But… today is the first day you have met me.”

“Believe me, Y/N,” He let out with an amused scoff. “The eyes never lie. You can tell so much from one interaction at two people than you can from knowing a whole history of them. I can tell.” He winked down at you making you giggle. “I knew my wife for nine months before I proposed to her. When you know, you know. I’m not married for forty-five years for no reason.” He humbly flexed. “I'm more… hesitant about your views on us as his family. Although by now, I'm sure Eijiro has told you a lot.”

You tilted your head in confusion. “What do you mean?” You asked softly.

You watched the older man hesitate, eyebrows furrowing for a moment. “The Kirishimas… we're a pretty traditional family, to put it simply. I'm in politics myself and the views me and my family have are rather… well some would call them leaning to conservative. I'm pretty sure that Eijiro has explained to you how he got Sachi.” You nodded your head. “I'm just warning you that Eijiro's a family man and you have to be okay with us, to stay with Eijiro.”

Although Takeo was being as nice as he could about the matter, you understood it plain and simple. It made sense and was a sensible argument. You were actually pretty glad to hear that he was talking about this to you. You paused making Takeo pause too. He turned to look at you as you smiled up at him. “Mr Kirishima, in the time that I've known your son, anything and everything he has ever said was either for the good of his child or logical. Never once has Eijiro or Akari tried to enforce anything on me concerning your views on things. I am not bothered by them, nor would I try to change them. That is how you raised your family and that is okay.”

Takeo took a moment to think about what you said and smiled. “I'm glad, pumpkin.” You felt him pat your head, catching you by surprise. The look on your face made him laugh. Before he could say anything, you saw something catch his eye. His eyebrows furrowed as he took a step forward. “Is that… Sachi?”

You turned to look where he was looking. It was then that you caught sight of the black haired girl, but you also noticed she was talking to an adult. The person she was talking to had short puffy blond hair and stood in all black before her. “Who is she talking to?” You asked looking up at Takeo.

The man looked furious as he swallowed down hard. “Bakugou Katsuki.” He told you.

At the name, you turned stiff.

Takeo stepped forward. “Sachiko!” Immediately at the sound of her name, Sachiko jolted in surprise as she looked to see who was calling her. Her eyes landed on her grandfather and you. However, he wasn't smiling. He motioned for her to come over to him. “Come here, now.” The girl turned and bowed to the blond in goodbye before leaving towards Takeo. The blond man looked over to Takeo. He stiffened at the sight of the older Kirishima.  

Sachiko stood before the both of you with a smile. You turned to her putting a hand on her shoulder. “Where did you go, Sachi? You can't just disappear without saying anything.” You told her with a worried look on your face.

“Sorry, I went looking for Aunty Mina.” She told you. “I couldn't find her, but I found that man who knows her and-"

“Sachiko.” At the sound her name, Sachiko turned to look up at Takeo. Takeo had a frown on his face as he kept looking at the blond who now had another blond woman with him and a brunette man stand with him. “I don't want you ever talking to that man again without a family member present, do you understand me?”

Sachiko tilted her head confused; her eyebrows furrowed. “But Baba, I don't understand.”

“Ah, there you guys are.” Eijiro walked over to the three of you with a smile and a cupcake in hand. “The derby is about to start and turns out Thunder is in the race.” He spoke optimistically. Eijiro then noticed the mood of the space he had just walked in. He looked to his father. Eijiro's gaze then moved to the group of blonds and the brunette man that were slowly making their way here. You watched as Eijiro went pale as he froze.

Sachiko noticed this too, not liking the mood of who she was around. She put her hands on her father's free hand. “Daddy? Daddy, what's wrong?” She asked worriedly. Eijiro's pupils went small almost in fear, his hands slightly shaking.

The blond woman was gorgeous, she smirked with red lips and just as captivating eyes that were more of a brick red. She was dressed fashionably, everything complementing her body. She was a beautiful woman and by the look on her face, it was clear she knew it. “Well I'll be. Kirishima Takeo. It’s been a while.” She spoke. You watched her viperous eyes move up and down Takeo's figure. “You’re looking good.”

Takeo’s jaw tensed. “Mitsuki…” He looked to her husband who stood behind her with a gentle smile on her face. At the sight of him, Takeo seemed to ease slightly, not seeming to have any issues with him. “Masaru and Katsuki.” He briefly looked to their blond son before looking at Mitsuki again. “You're here.”

She chuckled. “Did you expect otherwise? The Bakugous are the top ranked fashion brand in Japan after all.” She reminded him.

You looked to Eijiro noticing his expression hadn't changed. You quickly put your hand over his, leaning over to whisper in his ear. “Eijiro…” At the sound of his name he turned to you. You gave him a worried look before his eyes moved to a worry Sachiko.

“Actually, we were meaning to talk to you or Akari, business never ends afterall. Might we enjoy the race with you?” Mitsuki suggested.

Takeo frowned at the thought. “No thank you. It’s a rare day for my family to all be out and about like this together.”

Mitsuki smirk only broadened. “Oh but on the contrary, Takeo, we are joined by blood aren't we… Eijiro?” The question made Takeo glare as Mitsuki only seemed firm in her statement.

“Daddy?” Sachiko spoke as she tugged on Eijiro's arm.

Immediately the Bakugous looked to her. Mitsuki’s eyebrows raised in surprise at the girl, Masaru’s gaze softened realising who she was. However, Katsuki turned pale as he froze at the sight of her. With Katsuki's eyes on his daughter, Eijiro snapped out of his daze.

He frowned. “Sachiko, go with Y/N and get cupcakes. Aunty Tamami is there, and she'll take you to the rest of the family.” He ordered simply. He glanced at you, and you nodded understandingly.

You took Sachiko's hand trying to lead her away from the rest of the adults. “Come on, Sachi.” You spoke softly.

“But-" She started off as she looked to her father again. “But Daddy are you-"

“Kirishima Sachiko, do not argue with me right now.”

She paused at his tone, strict, but at the same time almost pleading with her to leave. She hesitated as she glanced at the blond man once more, before bowing her head respectfully, in the way she was taught to behave especially in public. “Yes, Daddy.” You offered her your hand and she allowed you to take her away, heading to get cupcakes.

A hum came out of the blond woman as she watched Sachiko walk away. “Oh isn't she gorgeous?” Mitsuki commented as she folded her arms. “My pretty little grand-"

“What do you want, Mrs Bakugou?” Eijiro asked interrupting her as he frowned mimicking his father's defensive stance.

Mitsuki looked to Katsuki. Katsuki swallowed down hard before looking at Takeo instead. “A business proposal if you will. We would like to purchase some of your diamonds to start a jewellery line, to put it simply.”

Takeo hesitated but looked to Eijiro. “That's for Eijiro to decide whether it’s worth the business venture. That's his department.” He revealed, turning all eyes to Eijiro.

Eijiro looked to Katsuki, emotionlessly. “Send your proposal to my secretary. I'm not working today.” He dismissed.

“But it would be such a good venture, would it not?” Mitsuki asked with a raised eyebrow. “The Bakugou and Kirishima brand together, wouldn’t that be wonderful?”

Eijiro didn’t respond as he looked down at his watch. “Excuse us, but the race is about to start.”

-Glitch1d

[writingroom21]

Can I get a request!

Rafe and y/n are both working parents, so they have a nanny, but the nanny develops a crush on rafe

Kinds like one tree hill storyline with nanny Carrie

A/N: I love the way your mind works. I hope you enjoy!

You're All That I Want

Pairing: dad!rafe x mom!reader

Summary: You hire a nanny when you go back to work. A serious of weird interactions make you think that the nanny is into Rafe.

Warnings: fluff, Rafe being a softy for his family, feelings of insecurity, (Let me know if I missed any)

Wc:3.0K

When your son Luca was born everything was perfect. Rafe finally felt comfortable in himself. His fathers words weren’t plaguing him, keeping him up at night just to tell him he’s a failure. All the nightmares throughout your pregnancy seemed worth it when he finally held his baby boy in his arms. He couldn’t have been happier. 

He had the perfect wife and now he had a son. A baby boy who completed your family, making his heart grow even more. Rafe was originally scared when you told him you were pregnant. The both of you had only been married for a year at that point. All of the negative emotions that he worked to put behind him came rushing back like a tsunami. 

His father’s hatred is at the forefront of his mind. He thought he was destined to fail, ruin the family he desperately wanted. “It’s okay. We can figure it out together. For better or for worse, right?” You rationed with him. Never letting him forget he isn’t his father.

“Thank you  for coming with me today.” You had just gotten out of an appointment. Rafe was focused on the little picture in his hands. The sonogram showing a blurry blob that was your baby. “Why wouldn’t I come? This is our baby.” He’s confused on why you would think he wouldn’t show. Yes he’s busy with work but you and the baby come first. “It’s just some guys wouldn’t think about showing up during the work day. So thank you for being an amazing dad.”

You kiss him on the check and continue walking. That’s the first time you called him dad. The role of the parental figure feels heavy. Then he looks at that blurry blob and at you. A sense of pride fills him, his family. From that moment on the nightmares didn’t seem as scary. They still made him doubt himself but it was manageable. 

Then on a sunny Friday morning your baby decided to make his entrance to the world. He was the most beautiful thing you have ever seen. You were crying as the nurses placed him on your chest for the first time. Luca’s little wales calmed once he felt your touch. “Hi baby boy.” You whisper, stroking his head lightly with one finger. You turn to look at Rafe.

He had tears streaming down his face as he watched the two of you. He has been staying back, watching his son from a distance. Following him around as the nurses cleaned him up after he had cut the umbilical cord. Once he saw his son and his wife bonding he broke. Every worry dissipated from his body. Knowing that he would do anything to keep the two of you safe.

Rafe was glued to your side from that day on and since your baby was glued to you, he always had eyes on the two most important things in his life. He felt lucky that he ran the family business. Since Rafe was the boss he could take as much time off as he wanted. You on the other hand had a steady job. 

In fact you were a nurse at the same hospital you gave birth at. They had so gracefully given you five months of maternity leave. It sure helps that they had an anonymous donor all of a sudden. Rafe just wanted to spend as much time with his family that he could. He knew you would want to work so he found a happy medium. His ideal would be you staying at home but you insist on continuing to work. He honestly values that quality in you, hoping that Luca and any future kids get it as well.

The first few weeks were hell. The two of you didn’t know how to handle a baby. Your mom tried to help as much as she could but you and Rafe wanted to figure it out on your own. It took a while but you got the hang of it. Soon feedings, nap time, and bed time were going smoothly. The five months had seemed to fly, feeling as if he was just born yesterday.

Towards the end of your maternity leave you both had a conversation. It was finally time for you to think on how to move forward with child care. “I have to be honest here. I love being at home but I miss being at work. I miss my patients, Rafe. I don’t know what to do.” You confide in your husband. Feeling ashamed for wanting to work. “Hey if that’s what you want we'll make it work. I won’t stop you.”

You look at him, trying to find comfort and finding it hard. “You don’t think I’m failing as a mother? Putting my job before our family?” You question, your fear finally being voiced. “Baby you are a great mom. I wouldn’t be as good of a dad if it wasn’t for you.” He comforts you. “I think you should do what makes you happy. If that’s going back to work then we’ll just find a nanny. It’s not a big deal.” You kiss him, grateful to have such a loving husband.

The Rafe you knew in highschool was completely different. He was a  trouble maker that made you fall for him. But now he’s everything that you dreamed of and better honestly. “Thank you.” You say after breaking the kiss. “How about we go look at nanny’s?” He questions, pecking you one last time.

The hunt for a nanny didn’t take long. The last five candidates really just have to pass the Luca test. He’s been fussy with people that aren’t you or Rafe. The only exception really being your parents and Sarah. Poor Wheezie is still trying to get him to like her.

All the candidates seemed perfect but Luca had other thoughts. Each one dropped like flies, not one lasting long enough to be considered. That was until Candice. She came in with a bright smile and Luca seemed to like her. You and Rafe watched as they played together, sharing a look knowing you finally found someone. Relief filling you both now that you have a solid plan. She was hired on the spot, instructed on all his needs and when to show up next week.

The final week was ignoring the outside world and spending as much time together. Taking every chance to cuddle with your precious boy and on rare occasions taking the opportunity to be alone. It was a perfect way to send you back off to the workforce. That was until your first day on the job.

You were happy to be back. Catching up with old co-workers, filling them in on the new addition to the family. Seeing the old patients that were still here and meeting the new ones. There was just this part of you that missed being at home. You chalked it up to just being back and went on with the day. The routine followed the same few a month or two. You went to work and longed to be home. A part of you telling you that something wasn’t right.

It never made sense, you loved your job. Sure there were some moments you didn’t like it, you just loved to help people. It’s normal to miss your child but this was something deeper. 

One day you got out of work early. Excited, you rushed home and were ecstatic when you saw that Rafe was already home. It wasn’t late so you could feed Luca and the three of you could spend time together. Once in the house you hear Rafe talking to the nanny.

“So basically you just buy property and sell them?” You hear her question. “Umm it’s a little more complicated than that. It can be stressful but yeah that’s the jist of it.” Rafe answers. There’s some clanking sounds of pots hitting each other. “You know if you are ever stressed I can help you.” Candice states. 

You freeze at her words. “Well thank you for watching Luca. Here’s your paycheck, see you tomorrow.” Rafe dismisses. You walk into the kitchen, looking at the two of them. Candice is sitting on the kitchen island and Rafe is moving around the kitchen. Candice turns to see you, her eyes narrowing a bit. “Oh hi Mrs. Cameron. I didn’t see you there.” Rafe looks over at you when you are mentioned. He smiles and walks over, giving you a deep kiss. “Hi baby.” He says, squeezing your ass a bit. “Hi.” You giggle, looking over his shoulder to see her gone.

You don’t mention how you feel, bottling it up and storing it away. Chalking it up to it being a weird interaction. Then you come home again a little earlier than expected. As soon as the door is open, arms wrapped around you. “How was your day Mr. Cameron?” A sultry voice asks. You push Candice off of you, her shocked expression matching yours. “Excuse me?” She backs away. Her hands rubbing together to calm her nerves. “I’m sorry I didn’t think you would find it inappropriate.” She reasons.

“Inappropriate? You said Mr. Cameron, were you waiting for my husband?” You accuse. Her eyes widened, her head shaking. “No I swear. I said Mrs. Cameron. You must have misheard. God I’m so embarrassed, I’m so sorry.” She seems genuine. Against your better judgment you let it go not wanting to think further into it.

The following week you get out of work, heading home just wanting to sleep. You had to stay extra today, your body is exhausted. You enter the house on pilot mode. Going through the motion as if you were in a game, all of your actions already being chosen. You didn’t snap out of it till you made it to the door of the living room. You saw Rafe and went to call out to him, stopping when you saw candice on the couch next to him.

They were close, leaning into each other. You stand there, an agonizing feeling in your chest. Why is he so close to her? Your mind thinks back to the way she threw herself on you. Of course she was waiting for Rafe. How fucking stupid could you be. Yet you knew he would never do this to you.

“Hey baby. Hi baby boy” You walk in and go over to Rafe, giving him a kiss. Picking up Luca for his playmate to give him a kiss. You look at Candice and she’s glaring at you. “Hi Candice. I’m going to go get cleaned up and we can have dinner.” Rafe’s hands find your thighs, rubbing up and down. He pulls you a bit closer, looking up at you. “Sounds good. I’ll put Luca’s toys away and get his food ready. Let me take him.” You hand him over to his dad, Rafe takes the time to kiss you one more time. 

That night in bed you let your mind wander. Voicing your discomfort in your own way. “The nanny is kinda cute, isn’t she?” You ask, head moving to look at him. He's reading a book and doesn’t really move to look at you. “Huh?” “I said the nanny’s kinda cute right?” This catches his attention.

People might think he’s stupid but he’s actually pretty smart. He knows what you are getting at here. You are starting to feel uncomfortable, maybe even jealous. “I guess, I never thought of it.” You hum at his response. It doesn’t give you much to go on. “It’s nice that she stays later even once you get home.” Rafe raises an eyebrow at you. Surely you're not implying what he thinks you are. “Yeah it is. Think we should give her a pay raise?” He jokes.

You suck in a breath, hurt starting to seep in. He wants to pay her extra for flirting with him? “What do you guys do while you wait for me to get home?” You get straight to the point. You are fed up of coming home and seeing how close together they are. You need to know if you are wasting time here. Rafe just looks at you, his eyes shutting closed and then pening up.

“Do you really think I would cheat on you?” He doesn’t hold back. The book is thrown off the bed as he turns his body to you. “No. I just can’t help the feeling that she likes you. That you will see that she’s better. It���s stupid but I really think she likes you.” He feels relieved knowing you don’t find him capable of that. He could never hurt you, you are everything to him.

“I’m never leaving you. I don’t think she has one and even if she does I don’t care. You’re all I want. We will be ninety and getting on each other's nerves. For better or for worse.” You laugh, your worries leaving. He was right, for better or for worse. 

Rafe didn’t understand why you were so worried anyway. All Candice asks him is about his day, job, and golfing. She will talk about her life from time to time but nothing more. He just simply didn’t see why you were so worried. The relationship between him and her was strictly platonic.

Rafe had beaten you home today. An account hadn’t taken him as long to close as he planned. He figured that this was a perfect time to make it up to you. He knows you have been having a tough time recently so he wants to make you feel better. Rafe had ordered your favorite food, went to the store and got your favorite chocolates and flowers. On the way home he even called your mom to see if she could take Luca for the night. He wanted to give you a stress free night.

“Candice, I'm home.” Rafe shouts into the house as he enters. His plan is to get her out of the house as soon as he can and bring Luca to your moms. He brings the bags to the kitchen, wanting to get everything set up. He’s in the middle of plating the food when he feels arms wrap around him. He smiles for a moment, thinking you got home and caught him doing something nice. He realizes something is wrong when the body leans deeper into him. He looks down and doesn’t see your ring.

“Can’t believe you would do this for me.” Candice’s voice rings in his ear. Rafe rips her arms off of him shoving her away. “What the fuck are you doing?” He yells at her. He stares at her with wide eyes. “What are you talking about? I’m just doing what we both want.” She’s walking closer to him. He has to shake his head to see if this is reality. Rafe puts his arms up before she could get closer. “Listen I don’t know what you think is happening here but it’s not real.”

He’s trying to be nice, not waiting to embarrass the young girl or make things awkward. “Yes it is. I see how you look at me. It’s okay Mr. Cameron I want to fuck you too.” Rafe is utterly bewildered. What the actual fuck is this girl on. “Hey I’ve done drugs in my time but I won’t allow you to put my son’s life in danger just so you can get high.” That could only be the possible explanation.

Every conversation and interaction is playing in Rafe’s mind. There is no way he gave her the impression that he wanted her. She just laughs at him. “I’m not on drugs, silly. I just want us to finally get it over with. I mean you brought all of this for me, clearly you feel the same.” Her arms wrap around his neck. You walk in just in time to hear the last part of what she said.

He really played you. He made you feel crazy for your thoughts and here’s the proof. You didn’t have time to speak up because Rafe was yelling. “Get the fuck off of me. You need to listen to me, touch me again and you are fired. Matter of fact you are fired. We will no longer be needing your service.” He shoves her off him, his eyes filled with rage. “What I thought.” Candice tries to explain.

“I don’t want to hear it. You know my wife saw you for what you are. A nasty whore who tries to break up families. I’m disgusted even knowing I defended you because you are nothing but shit on the bottom of my shoe. Take your fucking money and never come back.” Rafe throws the check at her yet she doesn’t reach for you.

“Let’s see what that little wife of yours thinks when I tell her how we’ve been sleeping together. She’ll leave you and you’ll just have to stay with me. She won’t believe you when you say I’m lying.” She smirks as Rafe’s face drops. Thinking she won the battle she goes to step closer to him.

“I think she’ll know you are lying. Then fire you just like MY husband did.” She freezes and Rafe looks relieved to see you. “Mrs Cameron.” “Save it.” you cut her off. “Take the money and leave. We don’t need you here anymore.” Candice picks up the check with a solemn face. She rushes past you as she leaves, looking back at Rafe one last time.

When she is gone Rafe takes a deep breath. “I’m so fucking glad you were there. I was close to punching her in the face.” He breathes out. You just laugh walking over to him. “I wouldn’t have minded.” He gives you a kiss, looking at the bags on the counter.

“So much for a romantic night for the two of us. Even have your mom for overnight duty.” You smile at him, biting your lip and you look up. “Why don’t we drop Luca off and you can make it up to me. Since we already have the sitter of course.” You rationalize. “I like the way you think Mrs. Cameron.”

[iknowicanbutwhy]

Puyo/Madou, meet ISAT. ISAT, meet Puyo/Madou. I'm sure you have everything in common and this is not at all a completely random crossover of my two current interests

[profounddefendorcrusade-blog]

Clover's personality (in-depth)

This thing turned out way longer than intended. As promised, I wrote my opinions in regards to Clover's mbti; I also wanted to include the enneagram but figured it would be too much, so I'll do that separaretly. For those who wanna get straight to the point, just scroll to the end of the post for a pic of the functions I think Clover has. But if you want more details, read the whole thing. Probably not many people will wanna do that, but I had fun, lol. Please excuse me for nerding out

Analysis

Even before they got into the Underground, Clover thought to themselves "Ok, this is a dangerous mountain and I ain't coming back, I'm probably gonna die and therefore not live to see the rest of my life play out BUT I'm gonna follow my values anyway. They're worth the risk." To me, right off the bat, that's Fi over Ti (aka inner values and morals over inner facts and logic).

I've done some research on this stuff and found out how "Fi knows the value of something not by analyzing it but by feeling it deep inside themselves that it is how it should be" Ti has to be as objective as possible, Fi doesn't. So I sat down and thought about how exactly Clover approached situations.

I feel like their main reasoning for being in the Underground were their inner values and beliefs of finding out what happened to the children. That's why I'd say they're an introvert rather than an extrovert (it's not because they're quiet and reserved, although they are, but because Clover's inner world affects their outer world). Now, both Ti and Fi look inward, and those inner thoughts and feelings affect how they interact with the external world. The real question is: is Clover objective enough to be considered a dominant Ti user?

We can see in the Vengeance route that Clover is stubborn with their beliefs and refuses to look at things from a more... logical POV: "Asgore killed five humans. Is it fair to wipe out every other monster in my way who gives me even the slightest reason to do it?" Martlet was the only exception because she was the only one who had tried to be nice and understanding. Clover's dark side is that they're tunnel-visioned and see morality as black and white (don't look deeper as to WHY the monsters do what they do), and blindly follow their own beliefs over what objectively makes sense. Just like Ceroba, who I'm positive is a feeler (she only considers how she felt about Chujin and not how skilled of an engineer he actually was, even when there's clear proof he wasn't the best at his job). 

Objectively, it's not fair to kill so many monsters after only five humans were killed. If Clover wanted fair vengeance, they would have stopped after five monsters were killed. But no. According to Clover's own logic, everyone morally imperfect, everyone who's hurt them, who tried to hurt them, or messed up somehow, must die. So, Clover isn't thinking about what makes sense; they're thinking about what makes sense to THEM, and stubbornly hold onto that till the end (again, like Ceroba), even after Martlet's warnings. She says how the Royal Guard will be after them.

The logical (T) thing to do would be to STOP before things become even messier, but once again, no. Clover doesn't care about the consequences, only fulfilling their mission that is driven by their own set of values. No matter which route you choose, you will be presented with Clover's own version of what "justice" means. It's not the objective truth, it's not what's the logical thing to do; they follow their own framework based on their (our) choices.

"If unhealthy INFPs are dealing with threatened values or viewpoints that oppose their own, they can go the other way and imagine that others are all corrupt, thinking badly of them, and deluded. They may see themselves as the only people who see “the truth”, or the only people who really care to make a difference in the world. They can become especially harsh and critical of others and take on a martyr role, gradually secluding themselves from other people". - this feels like geno Clover; they thought they were the hero but they were playing the villain all along

Now that I think about it, the logical thing to do, the one that makes the most sense, would be never to have entered Mt. Ebott in the first place. And if vengeance was what Clover wanted to do, it is fair and makes objective sense to kill only five monsters (since that's how many humans died). But as explained, Clover didn't follow that logical conclusion, but rather their own twisted sense of justice. The same goes for neutral. It's Clover who chooses who gets to live and who gets to die based on their own beliefs and feelings, which are not backed up by facts. Everything they do they do because they themselves feel like it should be done. They are the one who decide who gets to live and who doesn't based on their own opinion/how severe they think the misdeed of the final boss is. This counts for the regular monsters who attack them, too; again, THEIR own subjective decision.

For example, they might see Dalv's actions as acceptable/forgiveable and spare him, but not Starlo's and kill him. Objectively, both characters are messy in their own way, but Clover gets to be the "judge" and decide their fate, not objectively looking at the situation, but subjectively. In short, according to them, Dalv may deserve to live, but not Starlo. 

And even if they're a dominant Ti user, which I don't think they are, Clover is more past and future-oriented than present-oriented (N over S). As mentioned, they thought about how much they'd risk by going down Mt. Ebott (potentially dying, and definitely never seeing the surface ever again, or their family) but they followed their heart's desires; to them, morals and ethics (their own morals and ethics) were more important than what the more logical thing to do was (stay on the surface where it's safe).

In other words, they could already "predict" what would happen in the future, while in the present moment (the beginning of the journey).

And right before sacrificing their soul in pacifist, they think about how their death would affect ALL the monsters in the future, whether they had directly met and befriended them or not, even though they wouldn't be there to see it.

Clover seems to be able to easily move between the past, present and future, unlike sensors, who are mainly in the present moment (this is what I've heard somewhere at some point and remembered it, dunno how true it is). They can easily recall the past, and what they remember are things that moved them on the inside.

I've heard some of my friends say that Clover's character arc was to become a kinder person (develop their Fe), which, honestly, I don't think is the case. They simply acted on their inner views of what justice truly means, without further analyzing whatever they believed justice to be.

In pacifist, they're naturally selfless and kind and forgiving: a bit of a prankster, but they're one of "the best souls" according to Martlet. Just look at the ACT options that they used to befriend monsters. Quietly listens to Decibat, offers Dalv a handshake (and friendship), easily forgives Martlet, Starlo, and even Ceroba (+ gives her a hug), endures so many hardships yet keeps their heart pure and selfless. 

They were always driven by something bigger than themselves (like Chujin, who I also think is a N user).

ISTPs are more adventurous and independent and flexible and focused on current problems in the present moment; Clover has been future-oriented from the start; they depended on Toriel to take care of them, and didn't try to immediately "adapt" to the monster world. Their 1st reaction was to stay safe and cozy. ESTJs (yeah, at some point I thought Clover could be one) are more "ruthless" in their pursuits, they "force" others to adopt their inner values. Clover doesn't do this in any route; they simply act upon their own beliefs, but aren't demanding that other monsters to have those same beliefs.

That's why I think they're an INFP.

Functions

Fi (dominant) – "If something goes against their moral code, they will not go through with it." It went against Clover’s moral code to spare monsters in genocide and abort the mission, so they didn’t, regardless of Martlet’s warnings.

"Fi dominants are inclined to speak up against beliefs or actions that go against their personal values or express disapproval of certain behaviors." I can't find the screenshot, but in the Mines, if you interact with the character who's in the same room as one of the puzzles, Clover will find out how that character pulled a prank on that guy who later got a promotion in the pacifist end credits (I need to reply the game to find the screenshot). But basically Clover was upset that their own morals weren't met and gave them a "disapproving look" or smth

"Ti dominants most often feel compelled to speak out when people are acting inconsistent (ie: contradicting themselves) or when people are being illogical from the Ti user’s perspective." I think Clover reacted to the above situation as a Fi user

"Unlike Fe users, Fi users are very blunt and direct. Fi and Te creates a person who is brutally honest about their opinions and feelings. If they don’t like a person, they will let that person know." Not a person in this case, but an example of this are the options we get for Martlet's questionnaire. Clover will have no problem honestly giving her the lowest scores for both questions; we also also get the chance to honestly tell Ceroba that we're not into Starlo's training. There are these cases where they're direct as well:

...and blunt:

they would have given at least a smile or a thumbs up, but no, their honest opinion is their honest opinion

"They appear cold and withdrawn, but tend to warm up as they get to know a person."

Ne (auxiliary) – "Ne views a situation from multiple angles and motivations" I feel like this is best seen in pacifist; this is exactly why Clover decided to give up their soul in the end; they saw all the motivations of the monsters, from many different angles. On the flip side, in the vengeance route, it’s the complete opposite situation: Clover only looks at things from their own pov, completely disregarding others. That’s the thing about the INFP dark side: INFPs become "disillusioned or stuck in their ways." This 100% describes Clover at their worst: stuck in their ways is already explained, while we can say they were disillusioned when even Martlet turned against them/gave up on them (in Genocide). That was enough of a reason for Clover not to feel bad about finishing her off. They never liked her, but they definitely liked her more than anyone else, so I’d say it counts.

"Creative, open-minded, and able to think outside the box" We can say Clover’s creative when they build Axis’ robot companion, solved the two puzzles in the Mines, they’re also most likely into role-playing just like Starlo, based on their clothes (and they seemed into the whole larping thing with him), and how they seem to be into drawing; open-minded, definitely (Clover with everyone; the pacifist route in a nutshell); able to think outside the box (this goes hand in hand with them being creative: I forgot to mention the many creative ways they found to befriend monsters)

"Ne lives in the present like Se does but makes connections to past and future." Imo, this is exactly what Clover does (their sacrifice in the future, and all the things other monsters had said to them in the past; however, they DO interact with the present world at the same time. This is what I meant when I mentioned how they "jump from and connect all 3")

Si (tertiary) – "happy in their comfort zone" Is this Clover? Yeah. Initially, this was their "default" reaction/behavior: with Toriel. They subconsciously became more independent thanks to good old Flowey. As I said, their values led them to take the risk and come into the Underground in the first place, not adventure/excitement (the way I see it). Were they also seeking the truth? Yeah again, they wanted to know the truth behind the whole situation, but I think it had more to do with how they had found the fact that no other humans bothered to look for the kids immoral.

"Si users may draw on their past experiences to guide their present actions and decisions" Example, how the detailed lines they remembered everyone said in true pacifist, influenced them to make the decision to die in the present moment. Or when they asked Ceroba if she would date Starlo, after hearing and remembering Crestina mention his crush on her beforehand, wanting to set them up.

"Si users have a strong memory for past experiences and details" Yep, explained above. Also, dunno if this counts as noticing details, but we can make them beat the Shufflers’ game with ease.

"Si users are typically practical and realistic in their approach to solving problems" The Snowdin mini-quests come to mind (although they use past information here too to figure out what each character needs to be helped). Also, how they fixed the elevator by using a pickaxe (most practical & realistic choice). They’re also pretty rational while dealing with Guardener, and in general, while dealing with enemies.

Te (inferior) – I guess this is why I suspected they could be an ESTJ.

"seen as leaders" By everyone.

"Come up with ideas quickly" Pretty much throughout the game. They’re more low-key about this than ESTJs though.

"Ruthlss and domineering" This is them in vengeance route

"Extraverted Thinkers recognize the emotional content, but then they set it aside to focus on the facts" I feel like this inferior function of theirs is mostly seen in flawed pacifist. They recognized Ceroba’s emotional situation, but chose to be fair and just instead.

"Te users are logical" Recognizing the dangers of the Underground and deciding to stay with Toriel. We can also say it makes sense that Clover attacked those who attacked them first, and finished Ceroba off (Te is what is objective, but from the external world)

"Though they are generally free spirits, they like to have a certain order in their lives. They do enjoy structure, just as long as it does not intrude with their feelings/morals/ethics/etc. They like to be the ones to create the structure, not to have the structure to be created for them."  Vengeance route and Clover’s "mission" come to mind. Basically, the structure is that, whoever Clover sees as morally flawed, gets to die. And they stick to it

tl;dr this picture pretty much explains the way I see Clover's functions in a nutshell ↓

[legend-as-old-as-time]

Inspired by @muaka-safari's analysis of Vakama's relation to anger.

My hypothesis: Nokama, while stressed too about fulfilling her duty, has a different core issue in relation to it. Rather than the aspect of fulfilling a command by her leader, she constantly thinks of her behavior. For her, her conduct is part of her duty.

She has to act a certain way. She has to be in a certain way, or she is failing.

Which makes sense. She is a teacher, after all. She has to be a role model for her students. But what if it went deeper than that?

Nokama puts a lot of stock in order, reflecting her Metru and the vahki assigned to this metru: The bordakh. These vahki carry staffs of loyalty that instill uncompromising desire for social order.

Official material depicting in-universe information describes Ga-Metru in a very flattering light. It's the city's spiritual center and said to be favored by Mata Nui himself.

None of the Ga-Metru hold any jobs in terms of repair, manifacturing, or engineering. Matoran from other Metru do these jobs for them. Ga-Metru is privileged.

But like with everything in Metru Nui, this is only one side. The side most would think about first, whether as good or bad. The other one of this reputation means that all ga-matoran must be peaceful, right? They are orderly, spiritual, wise, etc. Otherwise Mata Nui wouldn't love their Metru as much.

Ooof. Of course, some would feel arrogant about that. But mostly, that'd be a lot of pressure. If you're the favorite of the city's most important person - your God - then you have to show it that you're showing reasons why you're the favorite? And keep it up all the time?

I doubt all ga-matoran took it that deeply to heart, but some of them likely did. They have to act responsibly. Among them is Nokama.

Remember what I said farther up in the post that she thinks she has to act in and be a certain way? We see it regularly.

Nokama in the movie and in the movie's novelization [[gave the Po-Matoran a sharp look. “Your negativity pollutes this sanctuary, builder.”]]

She snaps at Matau and tells him they have to take their duties as toa seriously.

She scolds herself after she argues with Vakama in the Archives. Never mind that it's a genuinely stressful situation and the others barely ever consider that they themselves need to make an effort to argue less. In my reading it felt like she deemed it more a moral failing of hers rather than a practical concern?

She tries to mentor Vakama and steer him into the direction of being leader. We're never given a concrete in-universe reason. (Out-of-universe, the writers clearly pushed the fire toa into the leader role.) But maybe Nokama saw it as her duty and responsibility to keep teaching in the one way she could, if she wouldn't teach matoran anymore? (Not to mention that's the only connection to her old life that she still has.)

She asserts that she's a toa in the comics when Nidhiki mocks her, Matau, and Vakama to be overgrown matoran.

Feeling rejected by the Great Temple when she enters it as Toa Hordika deals a heavy blow to her. She feels impure, as if she's longer fit as she is to serve the Great Spirit in his regard.

She has a rage breakdown, yelling that "She's still a toa!"

On the other end, Nokama notably has moments as Toa Hordika, while she's trying to calm down and find stability with Gaaki's help, where she doesn't seem to care about her previous high standards anymore. She feels tempted to give into her hordika side and is much more reckless, less thinking about how she acts as a toa.

She also makes an effective and chaotic team with Matau. As @crystaltoa pointed it out, they both are now "hold my beer" types, while they act about each other as "I can't take you anywhere with me!"

As if the transformation into a hordika beast, which looks nothing like a toa's supposed to, has freed Nokama from a great weight.

(@crystaltoa She might still think back on the Great Temple, however, and wonder if the stain on her from being transformed into a Toa Hordika remains.)

[aroacebrucewayne]

when I grow up, I want to be nothing at all

CHAPTER 1.

summary: ‘Bruce hasn’t looked at himself properly in the mirror for months.’ {batman? more like notman.}

a/n: 1. character referred to w he/him pronouns for a while because she doesn’t realise she’s transfem. She’s also Misgendered because the batfam doesn’t know yet. 2. I haven’t read any comics except for the first one w/ penguin in it!! All my knowledge is from other fanfics!! Do not come at me for not knowing lore please!!! 3. Story title is from “the end” by mcr because I’m cliche trash. 4. yes, I know Dick lives a city over. Why he’s randomly returning to Gotham on this day is unknown to me. But I have gone on overnight trips to visit my grandparents in the past and they live in another city too, so I guess it’s fine. Maybe he missed his family :) [also if you’re wondering where everyone else is/what their roles may be: patience. I’ll add to this au soon hopefully!]

5. Enjoy! Idk when I’ll be writing more for this but uh. Yeah. Have fun :)

Bruce hasn’t looked at himself properly in the mirror for months. He figures that it’s the scars crossing his body, riddling his torso and limbs with a map of his past victories and losses. Sure, he looks at his face to shave and occasionally cut his hair, but that’s about it. He’s still pondering this when he his phone chimes sharply.

Tim: hi bruce. dickhead coming for dinner 2day

The text, short and to the point, only reminds him to hurry up with his dressing. The batcave, while cool, isn’t an “acceptable substitute for fresh air and human interaction, Master Bruce.” So he swiftly pulls on a sweatshirt and pants, and goes back upstairs to wash the dirt, grime and facepaint off his face.

The bathroom tile he rests his forehead against is cool against his flushed skin, offering slight reprieve from the steady pounding in his skull. Bruce forces himself to look up at the mirror. Heavy dark circles, downturned mouth, and tired eyes stare back at him, and he trudges out into his bedroom.

The room isn’t really messy, he’s never allowed it to be. But there is a jacket flung over his full-length mirror, and a chair shoved in front of it, and both of them obstruct the full view of himself. He pushes the chair aside and grabs the jacket, convincing himself with some difficulty to look at himself fully and truly.

He looks normal. Maybe a little beaten down and weary, but otherwise he looks like a normal, regular, alright guy. The moment the thought manifests in his mind, he squeezes his eyes shut and tries to ward off the feeling of WRONGWRONGWRONG thrumming under his skin.

Fuck. Fuck. Maybe there is something wrong with him, something twisted. Self hatred is nothing new to him, but this feels different. More painful. He takes one more look at the mirror - Face your fears - and leaves the room, jacket tossed to the floor. He can’t waste time thinking about himself: Dick’s coming for dinner, Tim and Damian are coming home from school soon, and the sky is clear and cloudless. It’s a beautiful day, and Bruce has spent most of it in the cave, burning case details into his mind.

The thought makes his headache spike up again, and he casts his mind to other things. Chiefly, the sound of voices coming from the dining room. Tim and Damian are sitting at the table, eating sandwiches, while Tim chatters excitedly about his day to Alfred.

Bruce steels himself for a moment before he enters with a smile, jumping into the conversation with ease. All his worries and anxiety melts into the background, his chief attention being on this sliver of his family, here and now. His mind hones into the present, and he drops his earlier train of thought with ease.

He can always figure that thing out later.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV Ep3 Musings - Claudia & Louis (Spoilers)

I'm still teary & choked up while typing this. SUPER emotional episode. It's incredible how much they packed into one ep, too! But the second half of the ep was BY FAR the most emotionally impactful IMO. Jacob's acting is just WAY too good; he had me choking up something fierce.

Louis taking pictures of his food for no effing reason like all the social media girlies do; I love it.

Louis STILL tryna be Claudia's knight in vengeful black. U_U But just like before when he tried to save her from Lestat, he can't save her from Bruce or the Theatre or even his own eff-ups. DANG. 😔

YES YOU DO. If you wanna keep pestering her about trauma she doesn't want to think/speak about, then be prepared for the consequences.

AMC, you GOTTA kill Bruce on-screen for us, either in QotD during all the Burnings, or during the PL trilogy (Killer's death was GNARLY).

LOOK AT MY DAUGHTER ALMOST CRYING RIGHT THERE. God's strongest soldier, she's suffered more than Christ, JUSTICE FOR CLAUDIA. All rapists deserve the death penalty, IDGAF.

Understatement of the century.

I CACKLED at that literal DEMON TIMING. Armand was already AT the door while y'all were concocting your lies! Then he just strolls on in, uninvited! 😭

BULLSH!TE. Not that it matters, since vamps have SUPER-HEARING and can READ MINDS, you morons! Pack your bags and go back to America RIGHT NOW. 💀💀💀

Louis, beloved, bless your heart, but if you don't take your garbage attempts at lying back to NOLA and stop playing with this ANCIENT immortal dressed in all white like the effing BOSS PIMP you USED to be.....

Alpha DADDY Maitre Armand Sir, I take back every bottom Uke Omega joke I ever said about you~! 😍

Yeah, about all that.... 😬

Aaaaannnnnd THIS is where you effed up, Claudia.

And Armand heard the WHOLE THING. 😭

Look at her FACE. 😭😭😭😭

They KNEW she hated being treated as a child, and they KNEW her time was numbered cuz she lied about breaking their Great Laws, so they DELIBERATELY made the "Baby LouLou" role to humiliate her, and EXPLOITED her image to bring in extra revenue (how many BLACK actresses did they ever have in their coven/stage? ZERO); all while KNOWING they were gonna kill her and Louis ASAP.

I hate this Theatre coven with ever fibre of my being, Maitre.

Excellent point, Louis. Cuz I noticed in Ep2 that their apartment is kind of crappy--I assumed it was cheap & low class cuz of the tenants all being college students & sex workers, and I noticed a bunch of chipped paint everywhere; on the doors & walls.

They're slumming it in a studio, sleeping in the living room, as neither has their own room & she has to use a Murphy Bed. Major step below 1132; the exact opposite of how book!Claudia & Lou lived in Parisian opulence--highlighting my point that AMC!Claudia got NOTHING out out being a vampire.

But it's also pointing out how Louis covers all the cracks--in his MIND, in the lies he tells himself, just to live with the glaring problems he desperately wants to cover up & deny.

I'm finna yeet myself out the nearest window.

This is SO bizarre, cuz in this version Lou KNOWS Lestat's not really dead! In the book Lou set him on FIRE. So ofc he'd think Les was really dead. But here it makes no sense why he's carrying all this guilt!

Armand knew Lou & Claudia LIED, sure--but he SHOULD know Lestat's still ALIVE--he's probably chained up in the Theatre basement in one of those friggin "wet room burial vaults!"

THANK YOU.

The guilt is out of control. Louis, if Les couldn't tell you loved him after ALL OF THAT, then he's a effing fool who neither understands nor deserves you. Now go chop his d**k off!

Is that what you tell yourself when DreamStat's in bed with you every night? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I haven't seen mental trauma treated so well in Horror media since Senua's Sacrifice; this is incredible. 👏

Lou, give yourself a bit more credit--you're doing the best you can! :( Even if your best is an entire travesty. U_U

NOBODY TALK TO ME!

Just when I thought she was having a breakthrough, she doubles down on thinking Lestat lied to them about Europe being terrible. 🤦

(The way Lou clutches his pearls like he's having a heart attack--STOP it, ma'am~! 👌) And YES, you should've told her that you folded and spilled the beans to Armand and that she was walking into a trap, WTF!?! 😡

Jacob, your GirlDad is showing; PLEASE have mercy on us! 😭

EMMYS. 👏 GRAMMYS. 👏 OSCARS. 👏 TONYS. 👏

[zeebreezin]

🎲 maybe Bev could give Josie a kiss 🤔

Oh, to finally find friendship in someone else in your field, but find yourself on opposite sides of a conflict you could never truly grasp the scale of…

#39 - A Hesitant Kiss

The tales of London most Sequencers had heard growing up painted the fallen city as a dismal. Cold, and dark, and full of purposeless people struggling to find meaning. The dreary cobblestone streets were filled with disorganized souls pushing this way and that, with misery around every corner. Everything was drowning in chaos, in expression, in colours the young engineer couldn’t see. Nothing like the warm, bright, efficient life on the Geode, where everything ran in time with everything else.

No, nothing at all like home.

Professor Ashwood’s lab wasn’t quite as chaotic as the streets outside, far from it. Everything had its proper place - though some of it relied on a color coding system Beverley couldn’t quite grasp - and when the professor was at the helm, the laboratory ran with an efficiency any of his superiors would’ve been proud of. Not like they would ever know, of course. Beverley had tried his best to keep his hours in Professor Ashwood’s laboratory out of his reports to his superiors - after all, they knew that part of his posting here was to study. There wasn’t anything of note about that. He was there to learn. The soft comfort that came from finally donning the protective gear and entering the laboratory proper, wearing a smile that almost felt his own, well, that was clearly only the passion for his studies. The place was familiar, and calming, but that was all. Nothing of note. Certainly nothing outside his expected role here. He’d learned so much from the professor, after all.

That’s what made this difficult.

Beverley wasn’t exactly a hard figure to miss, parting the small crowd of fellow students as he walked towards Professor Ashwood’s office. The hustle and bustle of the crowd still set him on edge, with chaotic threads slicing through his vision at every turn. So much talking, so many different warps and shifts - it was enough to make Beverley’s head pound, if not for the dark lenses buffering out the worst of it. He didn’t wish the crowd could’ve stalled him for longer, that someone might’ve called out to him and delayed his journey. No, of course not. He had work to do.

He couldn’t help but hesitate before knocking on her door, though. Beverley’s hands shook, slightly, old scars prickling with half-forgotten pain. The script he’d written looped in his mind, over and over again.

Please excuse the disturbance Professor, I just wanted to let you know I’ve been assigned a short task on the Admirality’s orders, and I’ll be gone for some time.

Simple, polite, and to the point. There wasn’t anything to be worried about. Beverley knocked on the door, trying to suppress the hope that she simply wasn’t in.

“Please, come in.” Josephine’s voice, calm and professional as always.

Beverley’s pale form had to stoop a touch to enter her office, a bright smile on his face as always. Golden thread twisted elegant knots in his stomach. “Professor Ashwood! I hope you’re well- could you spare me a moment, perhaps?” He said, fighting to keep his voice light.

Please excuse the disturbance Professor, I just wanted to let you know I’ve been assigned a task on my superior's personal orders. I’ll be gone for some time. I don’t know when I’ll be back. It’s a simple, nothing to worry about.

“Can I help you with anything, Mr. Beverley?” Josephine’s voice cut through his thoughts. She stood in front of him. He knew exactly what to say. He’d had it in mind all day.

“I, ah, well…” Beverley swallowed dryly. “I’m… I’m going to be absent, for some time. Admiralty business, I’ve talked it over with the deans of course, I merely wanted to say my goodbyes in person.”

He could see the gears turning in her head - why would he be called out on business as a student sponsored by the admiralty? Why would such business take him out of classes? Beverley continued speaking, rushing to fill the air - he couldn’t answer her questions without risking something far worse.

“You’ve been a wonder to learn from, Professor- I truly mean that, you’ve…” Complicated everything. “Aided me greatly, in so much.”

Please excuse the disturbance Professor, I just wanted to let you know I’ve been assigned to build and detonate several explosives on campus for the purposes of killing your colleagues. This is what I was made to do, you know. Don’t worry - I won’t be back.

She had to be talking at this point. Consciously, Beverley knew that Josephine had to be speaking to him, and that he was responding. It was all a blur, though. He was thankful she couldn’t see his eyes behind the glasses. Gold crackled lightly in his gaze, trying desperately to keep the honey-gold grip on his mind intact.

Beverley reached out to shake her hand. And then he was holding her hand. And then.

“Thank you so much. I can’t say it enough, Professor. And I…” Fear was bleeding into his tone. The handshake had gone on for too long. A headache was blooming in the corner of his temple. Then all of a sudden, Beverley raised Josephine’s hand to his lips, barely a kiss. The tremble in his voice was even clearer. “Something glorious is coming, Professor, I’m sorry. For your sake, I hope you never see me again.”

Then, with more fear in his heart than he’d ever admit, Beverley ran.

[babtest]

I've actually been trained for the bot invasion by dodging and blocking the lanadelray cigarette girlblogger girlies that spam the gonegirl tag

[yunmeng-jiang]

that man does NOT think of wei wuxian as his gege

[nashvillethotchicken]

Thinking about Lestat seeing Louis’s eating patterns as a waste of his gift/himself while Armand gives Louis food that he literally can not enjoy or digest just so he has something on his stomach

[imminent-danger-came]

MK: "We don't have any other option! We have to trust him." Red Son: "*laughs* Great speech noodle boy! Super motivational!"

(2x00 Revenge of the Spider Queen)

-

Red Son: "*laughs maniacally* I, Red Son, will bind the powers of the celestial artifacts with Spider Queen's own venom, save my father, and reforge the world as I see fit! *more maniacal laughter*" Mei: "Red Son that was amazing!" MK: "Such a good hero speech!" Red Son: "-Villain speech! And perhaps my best of all time!"

(2x00 Revenge of the Spider Queen)

-

Lady Bone Demon: "Save your hero speech child—I've existed long enough to know when it's over. MK: "You still think that the universe really wants anything, from any of us?" Lady Bone Demon: "Don't you?"

(3x14 Destiny Fulfilled)

-

Sun Wukong: “ENOUGH! I’ve never let anyone dictate my destiny in the past, and I’m not about to start now. None of us are! We can’t change who we were yesterday or in a past life, or a hundred life times ago! We live with the choices we’ve made, for what matter is the choices we make RIGHT NOW! Only we decide who we are and what we do with the power we have!”

Curse MK: "Nice hero speech bud! But I know better—deep in your hearts, you don't believe a word of that."

(4x07 Pitiful Creatures)

-

Hero speech.

[revvethasmythh]

Still turning over the fact that Relvin didn't know anything about Liliana's powers until a couple of years after Imogen was born. Like, he knew she dreamed of somewhere bigger than Gelvaan (and spent time imagining going there with her), but can you imagine thinking you know someone, thinking you're building this life (on trust, on honestly, on partnership) with someone, and then they drop this bomb on you, the things they see in their dreams and what they can do with their mind and how afraid they are that your child will inherit the same gift curse? Relvin has no idea when her powers started. They may have been there from the day they met, for all he knows. And then, after telling him this, after sharing her fears for herself and for Imogen, she leaves. And he doesn't understand anything of what this means, he is confused and in the dark and now alone. All he can do is hope Imogen won't go through the same thing, while trying to swallow all the resentment and anger he holds toward Liliana for her sake. Absolutely impossible situation to be in, tbh

[fayevalcntine]

The whole "Claudia is now his sister"/Louis' sibling comparisons are never gonna sit right with me because that's never going to erase the fact that Claudia exists as a vampire partly because of him. Their relationship will never have this clearly defined role of siblings in the same manner Louis had with Grace or Paul, even if he was their older brother and was implicitly given the role of providing for them as the successor and manager of his family's estate. Because Louis was never responsible in part for their creation, the reason why they existed the way that they do in terms of behavior and life itself.

It also makes his betrayal of her all the more heartbreaking in ways that him and Grace drifting apart never will. He was her father, and didn't provide emotional support for her. She had to turn the tables and try to assume the role of being on an equal level because of this failure but this doesn't make him not choosing her any less painful than it did the first time. Even as they shift roles, take or give emotional responsibility one has towards the other, the fact that Claudia exists the way she does because of him and Lestat will always be there.

[defyingthefates]

With the revelation that Orym had a feeling Laudna killing Bor'dor would give Delilah a foot in the door again, and let it happen even as Laudna turned to him as a lifeline to stop herself. And with the Expanse and its characters on the brain. I'm just thinking about how sometimes, even in the absence of evil necromantic soul parasites, the important question isn't "is mercy the morally correct choice?" it's "is revenge the right choice for us?" It's about self-preservation. About staying the person you want to be. The person you need to be to keep putting one foot in front of the other every day. The person you can look at in mirror every morning. It's about knowing your friend will be disproportionately burdened by that choice and chosing to intervene. Not even necessarily to stop the killing altogether, just to stop your friend from hurting themself in the process. ("You're not that guy" but "I am that guy." "It's not about [them]. It's about us." "It wasn't mercy. It was vanity. I didn't want to think of myself as someone who wanted vengeance.")

In that moment Laudna needed someone to step in for her. To take the weight off her shoulders. I don't think Laudna wants to be the kind of person who kills to satisfy feelings of revenge (even without the threat of an evil necromancer hiding in her soul). Imogen pulled her back from the brink before. But this time she wasn't there. And Orym, in her stead, let her fall. When he could have chosen to intervene. Ashton too, to an extent, although in the moment it was Orym that Laudna looked to for restraint. Either of them could have made the kill instead. That this also put Delilah back in the picture... well that just makes this situation all that much worse. How does it feel to know that your friends let you free-fall into the dark? How does it feel knowing you let your friend free-fall into the dark? Worse, how does it feel to know you gave them that final shove over the precipice?