#Oh these days have been quite stressful apologies for the constant empty days

[daily-odile]

Loop hanging out with Odile?

gossip

[ithseem]

Headcanons for The S-Ranks' Reaction to You Flinching at them Raising Their Hand

TW: past abuse. Read at your own risk. Also not beta-read

(Also, as much as I hate Guy, I'm gonna write him to be normal for my sanity's sake)

@voltagefandomproject uhh... if you want it

Guy

Guy's workload seemed to have tripled in the past few days, and his patience seemed to be wearing thin

He seemed a lot more antsy than usual, everyone noticed this, even Lynt

Since you have basically been conscripted to be his assistant, you spent a lot of time in his chambers doing paperwork

All the tasks he had you do have to be done with no mistakes whatsoever

He told you this with a raised hand to make his point and...

...You finched

It was the slightest of movements, but it didn't escape his notice

The guilt had hit him a lot harder than he had let on. After how he had acted toward you, he could hardly blame you for reacting that way

Gingerly, he let his hand down and told you to get on with your work

Since that interaction, his tone of voice has become softer toward you, much to almost everyone's surprise

Also, you've been having a huge influx of gifts as of late as an apology

Roy

Roy has an immaculate image that he has to keep up almost all the time, so when he's around his close friends, he can let his mask come off

You were no exception. Even if for a little while, he felt free to let his hair down around you

He had invited you to tea on the rooftop garden to try out a new kind of tea Grayson had acquired for him

He was quite engrossed in the topic. He was talking quite animatedly, but when he raised his hand to bring up a point...

You flinched. It was gone in only a few milliseconds and was very slight, but he noticed how you cowered at his action

What happened? He couldn't help but wonder. Who hurt you?

Gently, he took your hands in his and assured you that no harm would come to you

Roy is heartbroken that you were so afraid of being hit, so this was the very least he could do for you

Lynt

Lynt didn't really move that much to begin with, as he's usually asleep

He had invited you to nap with him one day and he had extended his arm faster than he normally did

...And then you flinched

He felt like an ice cube slipped into his stomach. You were paranoid about getting hit, not that he'd ever do that to you

In truth, he HATES discord, and he would never dream of doing such a thing to you

Slowly, he pulled you toward him and held you. He told you he'd never hurt you

Somehow he became even more affectionate towards you than he normally is

Toa

Another case of stress overload

So much had gone wrong today, and his family's constant nagging had been even harder for him to bear

Idina gave him an especially hard time today

Listening to music helps him get to his peaceful "No thoughts, head empty" state, but his tutoring session with you was coming up too soon for him to put on a record, so he had to make do with fidgeting with his hands and feet for the time being

Being with you was nice, and while it did bring him some peace, he was still a bit stressed

So when he was making a point about a particularly difficult spell, he raised his hand...

And you cringed away...

Toa knows how cruel people can be (he's seen it firsthand), and it broke his heart to know that you also had to experience it for yourself

He lowered his hand and got on with the lesson after taking a breath

Once your lesson had finished, he told you that no harm would come to you and that he would make sure of that. He also gave you one of his favourite caramels before you left

Fenn

Fenn had invited you on a night out with him for some food

Some Luxury brands of wine from Luxure were newly imported to the Isle of Colde, and he wanted to treat you to some

He quite liked these brands, and the way he spoke of them was really animated

He soon realized he was being a bit too animated

He noticed that you flinched away when he raised his hand

Oh, dear...

You were afraid of him hitting you, weren't you?

Slowly, and deliberately, he wrapped an arm around you and pulled you into a tight embrace and told you that he would never do you any harm

While Fenn did tell a lot of lies, he still has standards. This promise was no lie

[chosonore]

part one | calmness

calmness [noun. the state or quality of being free from agitation or strong emotion]

pairing: kamo choso/f!reader

summary: falling in love with choso was a gradual and slow process, creeping up on you so inconspicuously that you don’t realize until the feelings hit full force. he’s become a constant in your life, your sun, your home. but does he return the feelings?

wordcount: 8k

content/warnings: roommates au, friends to lovers, fluff, slice of life, mentions of alcohol, language, some pining but not really, the amount of oblivious reader and choso will kill you, slow burn, characters are aged up if not already obvious, lowercase intended, [UNEDITED]

a/n: [hello this is a re-post because my blog was banned for a few days! so if you’ve seen it before, i’ve had to delete it i am so sorry if you’ve saved it. but it’s here to stay now!] here it is, the long awaited roommate!choso series wehfuhuehw if you’ve lurked around on my blog before, you would’ve seen the little drabbles i’ve sent suki a while back. this idea has been floating around in my head for so long and there isn’t really a lot of plot to it, it’s really just a really long slice of life thing. wanted to explore falling in love with choso, i just... love him a lot ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ i’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how he would be in situations like this and i hope you enjoy!

masterlist - next

you were pretty sure that you’d scared all the costumers away with your constant sighing – even yuuji was looking at you concerned now although you’d told him that you were fine hours prior. the entire apartment hunting issue was now getting to you; a few months prior, your landlord had announced that he would be selling the apartment, leaving you with no other option than to find a new apartment. but rent was astronomically high and you were already struggling as is. even finding roommates was proven to be a difficult feat, you weren’t sure why but you kept attracting weird people and now two weeks before the moving out date, you still didn’t have a place to stay. worst case scenario, you’d have to rent a storage space and crash at your friend’s place.

“y/n, are you okay? you look… very stressed,” yuuji asked gingerly, after he’d closed the store and helped you clean up the cash register area. “uh if it helps, you can vent to me! we’re friends right? so what’s bothering you?”

you were hesitant. sure, despite not knowing him so well since he’s only been working at the store for a month or two now, you would consider the two of you friends. but you felt bad just dumping the entirety of your worries onto him. so you opted to tell him the… short truth.

“ah it’s just- i’ve been looking for a place to stay because, essentially, i’m getting kicked out of my place but it’s been pretty unsuccessful,” you sighed, scrubbing at the counter more vigorously now. “i need to move out in two weeks but i haven’t found a place yet and the people looking for roommates just seem to be people who would drive me insane.”

“oh really?” yuuji sounded hopeful- wait, why did he sound hopeful? “my older brother is looking for a new roommate! his former roommate recently moved in with his boyfriend so the room is vacant right now. if you want, i could arrange a date for you to look at the apartment and meet him? i promise my brother isn’t weird or anything, he’s pretty diligent with chores and is always up to hang out.”

your jaw dropped; yuuji was your lifesaver. he was incredibly friendly and polite, always helping others and looking out for everyone. you were overwhelmed with joy and relief, maybe you were naïve and too hast in trusting his words but his brother had to be similar to him, you couldn’t imagine them being polar opposites. it couldn’t be that bad and at this point, you were desperate. “i would love that! when are you guys free?”

“ah we could actually head over to his place after clocking out,” yuuji put the boxes and pens back into place before ushering you to the staff room and turning the lights off. “he’s been home quite early lately, so i can just let him now right now if you’re free?”

you nodded in agreement, almost too eagerly, as you threw your jacket on and grabbed your bag, waiting for yuuji outside of the store. it was already dark outside and you almost felt bad for taking up his time like this but he had offered after all. yuuji was furiously texting as he stepped out of the building, screen lighting up his face in a comical way. in the dim light of the street lamps, you clumsily fumbled with the keys before finally being able to lock the door.

“you’re in luck, he’s home right now!” yuuji announced, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his red sweater. “said it’s okay if we drop by real quick.”

you hummed in thought, matching yuuji’s pace as you walked across the street. “does he live far away from here?”

“nope, it’s basically around the corner.”

thankfully, the apartment was within walking distance so you had a slow stroll while talking about work, friends and uni. although you shared the same friend circle, it was almost impossible to have both of you in the same room – yuuji was often busy with club activities while you were constantly studying or working. it wasn’t until he started working at the store that you finally got to know each other, immediately getting along much to your friends’ relief. he had never talked about his older brother before so you were surprised that he had siblings at all. but he sounded genuine when he said that his brother was cool so you didn’t think much of it.

“okay so this is the place,” yuuji stopped in front of a building, pressing the doorbell. “please don’t be too intimidated when you meet choso, he looks unfriendly and unamused sometimes but that’s just his face.”

turning around, you took a closer look at your surroundings. it was an apartment building that looked rather cozy, surrounded by tall, expanding trees. to your relief, it wasn’t a sketchy neighbourhood - you’d always felt wary about walking home by yourself after a late shift. in the distance, you could see a playground and screaming, laughing children. it was harmonious and peaceful, easing your soul and initial doubts.

“oh okay,” you bit your lip in nervousness as the buzzer went off, following yuuji into the building. the closer you got to the apartment, the squirmier you got, anxious about meeting his older brother. the door was already left ajar so you could enter, the smell of food wafting out of the apartment to the hallway. you peeked inside before entering, immediately feeling more at ease upon seeing that the apartment was organized and clean. coats and jackets hung up on the coatrack, shoes lined up neatly along the wall. several photos were stuck to the wall - one of a younger chubby-cheeked yuuji, one of what looked like a garden party, another one of a happily smiling group of people. your heart was warming up; yuuji’s brother seemed like a rather attentive person who appreciated his surroundings and close friends and family.

“choso! did you make dinner for me?” yuuji called out as he kicked off his shoes and stormed inside before you could stop him, leaving you to your own devices as you awkwardly stood in the hallway of the apartment after closing the door. you took your shoes off slowly, stalling as much time as possible. should you just wait for yuuji to come back? or should you come in and greet them with the same energy that yuuji just exuded? but then his brother might think that you were weird and reject you straight away. you froze when a deeper voice rang out.

“didn’t you say you’d bring a friend? where are they?”

you hastily took off your shoes and tiptoed deeper into the apartment, hiding behind yuuji as you looked at the taller man in front of him. his brother looked at you curiously, placing the cooking utensils he was holding onto the counter. so yuuji and him did look like polar opposites. yuuji, for the lack of better terms, looked like a soft peach while the man in front of you had tied his dark, long hair in twin tails and was sporting a huge white shirt with sweatpants but perhaps the most striking thing about him was the face tattoo. you hadn’t expected that at all. he spiked your interest, you couldn’t deny that he was attractive. you had to snap out of it, this was your potential future roommate and you did not need to have any further thoughts. not of that kind.

“hi,” you greeted quietly and held your hand out for him to shake. “i’m y/n, nice to meet you.”

“choso.” he shook your hand, giving you an approving nod.

maybe you stared at his hand a little too obviously, admiring his long fingers, his nicely shaped fingernails and the veins on his hand. yuuji cleared his voice, slightly elbowing you in the side. you gasped in embarrassment, jerking your hand from his and hiding it behind your back. choso didn’t seem like he had caught onto your staring. and if he did, he had enough mercy to not bring it up.

“let me show you your room first,” choso explained unfazed, patiently waiting until you followed him. he walked across the living room, pointing to the side. while yes, he was attractive and seemed to be an enjoyable person to be around with, you couldn’t shake the wariness in your bones. choso switched on the lights, letting you step into the room first. it was empty for the most part, aside from a few boxes that were neatly stacked and placed in the corner. the room had a comfortable size, big enough to fit everything that you owned but not too big so that you’d feel uncomfortable with the empty spaces.

“sorry about the boxes,” choso apologized, turning to you. “i’ve been storing some of the stuff from our studio here, since i sometimes work from home and it was more convenient to have it here instead of my room.”

“i see…” you nodded, trying your best not to peek at the contents of the box. “if you don’t mind me asking, what do you work as?”

“some of my friends and me, we’ve opened a tattoo and piercing studio earlier this year. i only do tattoos though, some of the others do piercings additionally,” he explained to you, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. your mouth fell open, making you look like a fish. you couldn’t hide your excitement, eyes gleaming like you’d just discovered the biggest treasure you’ve ever seen.

“really? that’s so cool! yuuji never told me you were a tattooist, i would love to see your works someday,” you grinned from ear to ear while choso looked away from you, not being able to handle the praise. although he appreciated the sentiment, he didn’t know how to respond to compliments - the feeling was foreign to him.

"yeah, sure," choso replied with a strained voice. in the dim light, no one would be able to make out how the tips of his ears reddened and choso was thankful for that. he cleared his voice, slowly trudging outside of the room to show you the rest of his apartment.

when yuuji had mentioned that he’d found a potential roommate for choso, he didn’t tell anything else. choso didn’t expect it to be yuuji’s co-worker, much less someone whose energy was so bright and happy unlike his gloomy self. he briefly wondered whether you were okay with living here - even if you were desperate to find an apartment, surely you'd at least want someone who was… more open and less intimidating than him.

you trailed behind his broad frame, carefully taking in the entirety of the apartment. it seemed like there was nothing to worry about. even though you've only known him for a few minutes, you felt at ease with him and that gave you a better feeling about moving in with him. yuuji was innocently sitting on the couch, spooning the soup choso had prepared earlier while watching tv. his eyes followed the pair, relieved that there was less awkwardness than he anticipated but slightly suspicious because… there was something.

as choso showed you the rest of the apartment - kitchen, living room and bathroom - he comprehensively explained expenses and house rules to you. there weren't many rules to begin with; choso simply disliked clutter and expected everything to be put back to its original place after use, being noisy was a no-go as well. everything in between was negotiable. by the end of the apartment tour, you joined yuuji in the living room. he shot you a questioning look, raising his eyebrow in curiosity. you were certain that you'd take the offer. there was no way this opportunity would go to waste.

"thank you for showing me around, choso," you smiled at him gratefully. "if you're okay with me moving in, i'd love to become your roommate. i think we'll get along well."

the last box was haphazardly tossed in the corner of your room, earning you a disapproving glare from choso. exhausted, you flopped on the bed and spread across it like a starfish. choso placed the remaining boxes on the floor. moving day was, despite choso coming to your rescue, utterly chaotic and tiring. your muscles were aching from overexertion and there was no remaining energy or nerve for you to attend to unpacking. you felt like a jellylike mass.

"i'll cook something for us. do you have any preferences or dislikes?"

you lifted your head slightly to peek at choso who was standing in the doorway, on his way out. “you’ll cook for me? what are you, an angel?”

choso didn’t reply, simply stared at you. he was used to such antics - it reminded him of his childhood when he was still living with yuuji and taking care of him. lethargically, you shook your head and planted your face back in the pillow. "no, i'm okay with anything. will inhale anything as long as it's edible," though your voice was muffled, choso understood you nonetheless. he made a confused, albeit affirmative noise before disappearing. a long exhale left your lips. truthfully, you were lucky to have an amazing roommate like choso. even though you didn't know each other well and he wasn't very talkative, he was very much willing to help. with time, you were sure he would warm up to you and become great friends. your eyes were slowly drooping, the exhaustion settling in your bones. within minutes, you dozed off into a deep, comfortable slumber. you didn't wake until a knock roused you out of your sleep, startling you in the process.

"huh? yeah?" you scrambled hastily, trying to fix the bird's nest that was your hair. choso did not need to see you in this state - delirious from being woken up from your deep slumber, feeling as if you'd woken up in a new century and with imprints of your pillows and blanket on your skin. before you could make yourself presentable, choso had already opened the door and stared at you unabashedly.

you blinked dumbfounded, staring back at him.

“food’s ready. you coming?” choso gave you a questioning look, waiting for a reaction. so apparently, he did not care what you looked like after waking up. he didn’t even bat an eyelid at your messy state, unfazed by it.

“uh yeah, give me a minute,” you replied after a few moments passed, sitting up tiredly. choso nodded before closing the door behind him as he returned to the kitchen. grabbing yourself a fluffy blanket, you wrapped it around yourself and waddled outside. whatever he had prepared, it smelled divine. you hummed in content as you took a seat at the dining table. the table was already set, dishes still steaming and looking so inviting that you had to stop yourself from drooling. choso padded to the table, placing some drinks on the table before taking a seat as well. as he described the dishes he'd cooked for the two of you, you inconspicuously looked him up and down. this time, without yuuji catching wind of it.

you knew choso was tall and very broad but you only realized the full extent of it seeing how the chair seemed tiny in comparison to his frame. his hair was down for a change, falling just above his shoulders. as usual, he was wearing comfortable clothes; a big shirt, big enough that you could admire his arm muscles and hands every time the sleeves moved. not only was he attractive, he was incredibly attentive and helpful as well, not expecting anything in return.

"thank you for cooking, i really appreciate it. looks really good," you complimented choso, taking a bite from the dish. you hummed delighted, wiggling in your seat happily. "oh my god, this is so delicious! where did you learn cooking like this?"

"i used to cook for yuuji and myself a lot."

"i wanna return the favour too but now i kind of feel inadequate," you joked lightly, smiling at him sheepishly. while you weren't the worst cook, you weren't outstandingly great either. choso however, was probably the best cook you knew.

"i don't mind. as long as you do your best, it's the thought that counts."

you nodded in agreement, taking a sip from your drink. silence fell over you; a comfortable silence however, both of you just enjoying the food. you supposed it wasn't too bad if you took your time getting to know each other - after all, choso seemed like someone who would quickly recoil if cornered. it wasn't too much of a concern.

after finishing the meal, you helped him clean up and wash the dishes. nudging him gently, you asked: "do you want to watch some movies after? yuuji recommended me a few that i have yet to check out."

choso took the plates, drying them with the towel before placing them back to their designated spots. "sure, you're responsible for the movie selection then."

spending time with choso was easy, almost too easy. you were glad that the two of you were off to a good start, he didn't seem to mind your company and you enjoyed his. cheerfully, you put the movie on, snuggling the blanket that was wrapped around you. the way you were laying on the couch was reminding choso of a little burrito. unbeknownst to him, the corner of his lips lifted a little at the sight. he waited until you noticed him and shuffled a little so he could sit on the couch as well. the movie you had chosen was a lighthearted comedy, one that yuuji had highly praised and recommended you watch first.

midway through the movies, the exhaustion was creeping up on you, making you feel heavy and sleepy until you slumped against choso's side. he glanced to the side, observing you to see whether you would wake up. soft and steady breaths left your lips, already asleep within seconds. choso pondered whether to wake you now, worrying that you would miss out on the movie that you were so eager to watch. you looked so peaceful that he felt bad, deciding to wake you once the movie was over. but even choso couldn't shake the tiredness, gradually slumping against you until sleep overtook him as well.

as the sun was rising, light was flooding the apartment, filling it with warmth. you scrunched your eyebrows at the brightness, attempting to move so it wouldn't blind you. the first thing you noticed was your strained neck - probably because of the weird position you had slept in - and the second thing was that something heavy was laying on your lap. blinking in confusion, you peeked, groaning inwardly at the blinding light. black hair was splayed across your lap, connecting to… choso? oh no. oh no. you must've fallen asleep while watching the movie and judging how choso was comfortably using your lap as a pillow, he did as well. embarrassment spread throughout your body; this wasn't supposed to happen, much less with someone you didn't know so well.

now that you were unintentionally watching him, you felt creepy. the situation was too perplexing to you - should you wake him now? or just wait… until he woke up? but what if you had to pee. what if choso wasn’t going to wake up until a few hours later? what if he woke up and saw you staring at him like a creep? though you did think he looked vulnerable and peaceful in this state, unusual from his intimidating, unwavering self. it made your heart tingle with an unknown feeling, softly bubbling with curiosity.

beneath you, choso was moving slightly, shuffling around until he felt comfortable. you stayed still, tensely watching his next movements. he remained still for a while, making you exhale in relief. until he didn’t. choso blinked a few times, trying to make sense of his surroundings until his gaze fell onto yours. and you stared back, frozen in fear. even if he was the one laying on your lap, you felt anxious.

“uh i… we must’ve fallen asleep last night, ha ha…”

“you fell asleep early on and i was going to wake you after the movie ended but fell asleep myself, i’m sorry for making you feel uncomfortable,” choso apologized sincerely and sat up right away, rubbing his eyes sleepily. even though he looked rather deadpan, there was a trace of embarrassment on his face.

“oh no, it’s okay! we both fell asleep after all… ah, since we’re roommates, we’re sort of friends now, right? so don’t mind it too much, it happens!” you gave choso a reassuring smile, showing him that there was no bad blood between you.

choso nodded slowly. “i guess so. i’m glad you don’t mind. "

an awkward pause.

"do you have classes anytime soon? i can make breakfast for us.”

and just like that, the tension between you was alleviated. not completely gone, but barely noticeable. choso stretched like a cat, yawning quietly before he got up. you couldn't help but glance at his toned stomach, eyes almost bulging at the sight. turning to the side, you hid your face and cleared your voice. "i don't have classes today but i have to go to work later. so i won't say no to breakfast if you're making it."

"how's living with choso?" yuuji questioned you curiously, leaning against the counter. lowering the pen and writing board you were holding, you hummed in thought. in the past few weeks, the two of you had settled into a comfortable routine. there were minor hiccups here and there but the issues were easily resolved - somehow, you silently understood each other, an important foundation for a good friendship.

"pretty relaxing, to be honest. he's a good roommate and friend," you replied, clicking with the pen which earned you an annoying glance from yuuji. "you should've told me he was a great cook! i don't think i've ever tasted any dishes that were as good as his."

"he cooks for you?" the surprised tone in yuuji's voice startled you. was that out of the ordinary? you just thought he was being a good friend when he prepared dinner for you whenever you had a late shift.

"uh yeah? mostly when i come home late or when we have movie nights together. i always tell him that i can definitely help but he insists that he's fine doing it himself."

"i see. choso just doesn't like people messing with his cooking routine, that's all. i'm not even allowed near the kitchen, even though i'm not that bad of a cook either," yuuji laughed, scratching his head sheepishly. he wasn't going to tell you why he was perplexed by the fact that choso willingly cooked for you. it was too early to make any assumptions; he just couldn't shake the feeling that there was something at play. no one knew his brother better than him - choso would never do any favours for persons he didn't care about, persons that weren't family or extremely close friends. while they had talked about choso's thoughts about you, he never mentioned anything more than getting along well and often spending time together. for choso's standards, you were a quite close friend.

"oh, and here i was, thinking that he must really hate my cooking skills. so it's just that," you concluded, grinning happily. he was weirdly persistent about it but knowing this detail about him, you'd stop pestering him in the future. "hey do you wanna come over tomorrow? it's movie night again, i'm sure you'd enjoy it too."

"hmm, sounds tempting. if you can convince choso to cook, i'm in."

"pff, who would say no to this face," you retorted mischievously, showing yuuji the best puppy face you could muster up. he groaned, pushing you gently.

"show off," he told you jokingly and rolled his eyes. "i don't know how choso tolerates you."

"you're just jealous, huh? didn't think you had that emotion in you. choso and me are the bestest of friends, of course we get along well," you stuck your tongue out at yuuji before leaving him to his own devices as you bolted to the cash register to help a customer. as you animatedly conversed with them, yuuji shook his head. it was obvious that there was some attraction but that was something he'd let you figure out. cupid wasn't a well-fitting job for him. friends, my ass.

"huh, did you say something, yuuji?"

"no, not at all."

soft, melodious music was playing in the background as you silently sat at the counter, watching choso prepare some meals before yuuji was visiting. this time, you heeded his advice, not pestering his brother about needing help and instead just opting to watch him and make light conversation. choso seemed to have noticed as well, mood ever so slightly lifted when he saw you simply taking a seat and asking about his day. he liked this routine, being able to go about his day without someone unwantedly poking their nose into his business until he felt comfortable enough to talk about it. as you absentmindedly doodled on a napkin, choso casually told you about his day at work. about squirmy customers who were getting their first tattoo done, about those that had interesting ideas that he was still trying to find ways to implement, about how noisy his co-workers were and that they wanted to have a night out soon.

“do you wanna join us? you said you wanted to meet my friends,” choso asked, briefly glancing up at you as he was dicing the vegetables. it was true, you did inquire about his friends at some point, more so jokingly and out of curiosity - although he complained about them every now and then, you could tell that he deeply cared about them. choso was the kind of person who acted like a mother hen around friends and sometimes nagged a lot more than you anticipated. but then somehow, miraculously, every minuscule task that would stress you was completed and topped with a freshly made, warm dish by the end of the day. he wasn't good with words but his actions made up for it.

you didn’t expect him to offer you to tag along. he was comfortable enough to introduce you to his friends, even seemed to trust you with them. it felt… strangely heartwarming. "i would love to join you but i have quite a lot of assignments piling up; i'll have to do some night shifts to finish them," you replied and sighed ruefully, putting the pen away. "i'll tag along once i've finished everything, okay?"

choso frowned slightly. "but don't overwork yourself. you'll end up frustrated and burnt out," he told you earnestly, reaching out to pat your head. you gaped at him, the fond gesture making you feel flustered. it was nice knowing that he was looking out for you. choso stared back at you, seemingly startled by his own gesture as well. his hand had moved faster than he could react - he didn't know what to make of it.

the ring of the doorbell interrupted every trail of thought and you jumped up quickly. "i'll get it!" you sprinted towards the entrance, letting yuuji in. perhaps you greeted him too overzealously, yuuji looked at you like he knew something was up. nonetheless, he didn't mention anything, instead presenting you the bottle of wine and some dvds that he brought. choso gave his younger brother an acknowledging grunt, too absorbed in his tasks. taking in his surroundings as he got comfortable on the couch, he noticed some subtle changes in the apartment - the numerous pillows and fleece blankets littered across the couch, the set of matching mugs as well as choso's sketchbooks and, presumably, your textbooks on the coffee table. it was obvious that the two of you spent a lot of time together.

even throughout dinner, yuuji realized that choso had taken a liking to you, more than he probably realized and let on. he almost felt like a third wheel watching how you animatedly talked about trivial things and even more so when it was movie time. like a little burrito, you were wrapped in a blanket, leaning against choso. though it surprised yuuji to see his older brother opening up to you so rapidly, he was happy about it. although chaotic and clumsy, you were a good person and a positive influence. having witnessing how choso had closed up and how hurt he had been after the break up of his previous relationship, yuuji was glad that he wasn't cautious around you and welcomed your presence. even though… both of you were painfully oblivious.

"should we wake her?" yuuji asked as he saw you snuggling into choso's side, peacefully sleeping while the movie was still on.

"no, it's okay. she often falls asleep midway through movies, i just let her sleep. probably exhausted from uni."

yuuji looked at him as if he grew three heads. "so you just let her sleep? and you… sleep on the couch too?"

"hm? yeah, kind of. i feel bad about waking her and we're friends so it's not that big of a deal," choso replied innocently, shifting slightly so he was comfortable while keeping his arm around you. ever so slightly, he leaned onto you.

yuuji buried his face in his hands, silently screaming. don't comment on it, don't say anything, it's none of your business. you might have pink hair but you're no cupid.

utterly exhausted, you made your way into the apartment. you flopped onto the couch, grunting in irritation when you heard choso calling your name. staying put, you just laid there and listened to his footsteps nearing. "you okay? did anything happen?" he questioned, leaning over the couch to look at you. you weren't even sure what to answer, whatever you were feeling at the moment was an accumulation of stress across multiple weeks. you were frustrated with your projects, feeling like you weren't making any progress and not having time for yourself whatsoever. all you needed was a break, a pick me up.

"do you wanna talk about it?" choso repeated again but you shook your head, lifting your head slightly to look at him. he almost felt bad for thinking that you looked adorable, the way you huffed in frustration with a little pout on your lips. you shook your head, hugging one of the pillows.

"not now, later maybe?"

"okay. i'll make you a cup of tea." he disappeared from your field of vision. you listened to the sound of the kettle, closing your eyes as you focused on it. slowly, your erratic thoughts came to a halt. your breath and heartbeat steadied and you gradually felt more calm. clack. choso placed the cup of tea on the coffee table, taking a seat next to you. he was hesitant to touch you just yet, waiting for another reaction from you. sniffling quietly, you sat up and thanked him quietly.

"choso?"

"hm?"

"can i have a hug?" you inquired meekly. he didn't reply, simply pulling you into his arms. without hesitation, you wrapped your arms around him, nuzzling your face in the crook of his neck. he smelled nice, like freshly washed laundry and the shampoo he was using. it reminded you of home, making you feel more at ease. gently, choso rubbed your back; wherever his fingers moved, it left a trail of goosebumps on your skin. not that he noticed anyways, fortunately. for a few minutes, only the sound of breathing resounded. it was calming and warm - choso was warm, so warm - you almost fell asleep. humming quietly, you moved closer to him.

"today was just really… bad. everything went wrong," you confided in him. "it made me feel like shit, like i couldn't do anything right. i guess i just feel really stressed so i can't concentrate on anything."

choso leaned forward, reaching out to grab the cup of tea. you squeaked in surprise, holding onto him so you wouldn't drop backwards. his left arm snaked around your waist, keeping you in place as he leaned back again. you moved back a little, as far as choso's arm allowed you to, and took the cup from him, taking small sips. "i think you're doing okay," he told you, drawing patterns on your back. "it's only natural to feel this way when everything's been piling up. what you need is a good rest and have a reset, you'll feel more refreshed and inspired to work on your projects. and don't hesitate to ask for help, no matter whether it's a professor or classmate."

"i also told you not to overwork yourself, didn't i? and don't think i can't tell that you've been pulling all nighters," he scolded you, pinching your cheek playfully. it made you giggle, tilting your head to get away from his hand.

"yeah i know, i know. just couldn't help it, it's a bad habit. i'll try to get better at it," you promised him, giving him a reassuring smile. "thank you for listening to me."

"it's the least i can do."

a comfortable silence fell over you. choso continued to rub your back in an attempt to soothe your nerves while you sipped your tea. you were grateful for him, he was an amazing friend - you didn’t even know how to show gratitude to him. awkwardly turning to put the mug back on the table, you then leaned against him. “choso?” you hummed against his chest, snaking your arms around his waist. “you know you can talk to me about problems too, right?”

“what do you think we’ve been doing these past few weeks?” he retorted and chuckled in amusement. “you should try to go to bed now. get some rest, you’ll feel better tomorrow.”

you pouted, not wanting to move. fortunately, he couldn’t see the face you were making - you weren’t ready to let him go just yet, wanting to memorize the expanse of his chest, his warmth, the way his arms felt around you. it made you feel safe, like a temporary relief to your anxiety. “can we… can we watch a movie maybe? i’m not sleepy yet.”

of course, choso saw right through you. “you always say that and then you fall asleep midway. you just don’t want to move, huh?”

“okay, you caught me,” you giggled hysterically as he stood up slowly and pretended to let you fall, catching you before you fell. clinging onto his shoulders, you wrapped your legs around his waist. you refused to let go. unbothered, he held you by your thighs as he waddled across the living room towards the console to choose a dvd to watch. while clinging onto choso, you could hear his heart beating rapidly - you chalked it up to how strenuous it must be to carry you around. choso, on other hand, couldn’t put a finger on the warm, tingly feeling inside of him. did he like having you around like this? stupid, of course he did, you were good friends after all. spending time with you was relaxing for him as well. back on the couch, he let you use his lap as a pillow, absentmindedly combing his fingers through your hair. the two of you remained in this position until both inevitably fell asleep, movie still playing in the background.

“y/n. earth to y/n. dude, can you hear me?” nobara was frantically waving papers in front of your face, rolling her eyes as you snapped out of your trance and took them from her. to your delight, the two of you shared quite a few classes this semester which meant that you could usually share the workload as well. you copied some of her notes, hastily scribbling them in your notebook.

"sorry, i was lost in thought. what did you say?"

"i asked you whether you wanna go out later? the whole crew is coming, it's been a while anyways," your friend repeated, placing her little cosmetics bag on the table to check her makeup and apply another layer of lip gloss.

"ah sorry, i already have plans for today, maybe ano-"

"with whom?" she asked pointedly, narrowing her eyes at you. in recent times, you've been rejecting her offers to hang out a lot; whether it be because of studying or hanging out with… "wait, are you having a date with that roommate of yours again?"

"it's not a date!" you briefly paused, giving her a dirty look. nobara was weirdly persistent about this dating thing, claiming that you would never get anywhere if you didn't make a move. "his name is choso, yuuji's older brother. i told you a million times already. he's been a really good friend and taking care of me when i feel stressed, so i thought it would be time for me to do the same for him."

"a really good friend?" a doubtful look was shot your way.

"yeah, i mean yuuji cooks for us all the time, how is it any different? anyways, i'll join you guys another day, okay?"

nobara stayed still for a moment. you truly didn't realize how much you's been mentioning choso. choso this, choso that, choso here, choso there. even yuuji had confided in her that he thought you might have developed a crush on his older brother though he wasn't certain. nobara, however, was sure. but operation make y/n realize things proved to be more difficult, considering you hadn't had a crush before as you were never interested in relationships.

"fine. but in return, you have to tell me about choso. what do you think of him?" nobara stuffed her belongings into the impossibly full handbag. propping her chin on her hands, she leaned closer to you with a shit-eating grin. you sighed, putting the papers away. it was no use trying to focus on your assignments when she was in an investigative mood. she wouldn't let go of the issue until you gave her a satisfactory answer. and for some reason, it irked you that she was inquiring about choso. why was she so curious about him? couldn't she have asked yuuji instead? it was his brother after all. maybe nobara was… interested in choso? you narrowed your eyes at her.

"i think he's great. might be intimidating at first and not very talkative but when he opens up to you, he's actually a softie. very respectful and polite towards people, always thinks of others first. and not to mention, he's really talented too! he often acts like he's annoyed by people or minds his own business but he really does care a lot. you feel comforted by his presence when you're close with him," you rambled, trying to list all the positive points about him that you could think of. nobara nodded slightly as she was listening to you, making it difficult to gauge her stance on him. was she going to confess now? maybe you should confront her about it. yeah, she would never admit it otherwise. "nobara, are you interested in choso? if you wanted me to introduce you to him, you could've just asked."

nobara stared at you with an open mouth. checkmate.

"you know i wouldn't have judged you at all! after all, choso is handsome too. so really, you don't have to sneak around about this," you concluded triumphantly, patting her arm in reassurance. it filled you with pride to be able to catch nobara off guard for once - usually, she was very composed and ready to give you a sassy answer.

"y/n, sweetie. you're so very wrong." nobara sighed, dejectedly pushing your hand away. you were incredibly dense when it came to feelings and relationships. maybe it would be more amusing to just watch everything pan out. “i don’t really care about choso, that’s your man after all.”

“yeah, yeah, i- wait what?”

thankfully, you arrived home earlier than choso did - for once. and for once, this friday was going to be a relaxing one, seeing as you’d finally finished your projects and assignments and could finally engage in a much needed self care day. placing the groceries bags on the counter, you went through the ingredients again just to make sure you didn’t forget anything. yuuji had given you a recipe for his famous meatballs recipe, claiming that it was one of choso’s favourite dishes. in recent times, choso seemed to be exhausted and sometimes even easily irritable after work - considering how much he did for you, it was only fair for you to treat him as well. surprising him seemed to be the best course of action.

making quick work of the ingredients, you took your time to clean the apartment while the soup was still cooking. yuuji was kind enough to lend you a few dvds, not even asking you whether you were going to watch them with choso anymore. while you felt bad about turning your friends down yet again, you promised yourself to make it up to them in the future by inviting them over for a sleepover or movie night. though knowing them, they would not let you stay in the comfort of your home but drag you to a party or club again. especially nobara would always insist on dragging you along, while megumi and yuuji didn’t really care about where they would be going for the night. her excuse was to find you a partner, claiming that it was about time you realized how cute you were, which you vehemently denied. even maki had told her to pipe it down at some point. all the more, it made you suspicious that nobara had not brought the topic up anymore. you couldn’t imagine her giving up so quickly, considering how persistent she had been for almost a year now.

the jingle of the keys and the soft click of the door made you stop whatever you were doing, peeking around the corner to see choso coming in. giggling quietly, you watched as he stopped in his tracks and sniffed the air, seemingly confused about the scent of the soup. he turned around upon hearing you, a small, almost unnoticeable smile on his lips. “up to no good?” he questioned you teasingly, placing his bag and jacket in the wardrobe. huffing, you stuck your tongue out at him and shook your head. you padded over to him, softly tugging at the sleeve of his shirt to make him follow you to the kitchen.

“since you always cook for me, i thought it would be time for me to do the same for you. yuuji showed me your favourite dish but i’m not sure if it turned out as well as he always makes it,” you sheepishly explained, showing him the pot of soup and the bowls and cutlery that you’d already laid out. choso hugged your side, squeezing your waist gently before patting your head and muttering a quiet thank you. your chest filled with pride, finally being helpful to him for once. if you weren’t careful, it would burst - he fuelled your ego even more as he complimented you, telling you how well the soup turned out and that he really appreciated it. you knew he wasn’t lying, for one because he was a sincere person and always offered heartfelt compliments, and because of how eagerly he was eating, practically inhaling the soup in one go. he even looked like he was in a food coma by the time you finished dinner, making you ban him from the kitchen to take a rest on the couch.

after washing the dishes, you came back to the living room to see him lie across the couch, eyes closed and calmly breathing. he looked like he was taking a nap, until he opened his eyes to peek at you as you approached. giddily, you joined him on the couch, showing him the hair products that you’d already placed on the coffee table. “can i give you a massage and do… uh hair stuff? i really like it when people brush my hair and stuff and i thought you might enjoy it too,” you explain to him. choso contemplated for a few seconds before shrugging nonchalantly. yes! you signaled him to sit on the floor in front of you as you pressed play. with the sound of the movie in the background, you focused on choso’s hair and took off the hair ties first. he got comfortable, turning towards the tv and learning his head against the edge of the couch. gently running your fingers through his hair, you made sure to detangle rough knots before massaging his scalp gently. you could tell that choso was beginning to relax by the way his shoulders were slowly sagging. in silence, you worked through the entirety of his scalp before moving on to brush his hair.

if you didn’t already know that choso was a naturally withdrawn person, you would’ve been concerned by how quiet he was and how he didn’t show any reactions to the movie. you were glad that he seemed to like the entire hair spa ordeal; he didn’t even seem to mind that you were using your hair products on him, the soft floral scent now emanating from his hair as you massaged it through the tips and then brushed it in slow strokes. by the time you were done, he looked utterly relaxed, struggling to keep his eyes open as he climbed back on the couch and sat next to you. without having to ask, he wrapped his arms around you. yawning quietly, you moved closer to him, turning your attention to the tv. habitually, his hands moved against your back, drawing shapes and patterns. slowly, choso could feel the heat in his body rising and chalked it up to the close proximity. it did make him feel a little uneasy however; he shifted you around on his lap until he felt comfortable. abruptly halting his movements, he froze as you turned to him, ass grazing his groin. an electric shock ran through him. subconsciously, he jolted at the friction. the tips of his ears turned red in embarrassment but he reassured you he was fine when you looked at him concerned. what the hell was that? was his body now not listening to him after being so relaxed?

“choso, can i ask you something?” you leaned back slightly to look at him.

“you already did. but yeah, go ahead.” choso grinned at the little huff you let out, grasping your hand in time as you tried to hit his chest and intertwined your fingers so you couldn’t move.

“uh this might sound weird but i think a friend of mine is interested in you. nobara, do you know her?” you squeezed his hand, moving it around with yours. “she asked me about you the other day.”

“huh, really? isn’t that one of yuuji’s friends too?”

you nodded in agreement. “yeah, we’re all friends. i only told her good things about you, of course.”

choso hesitated. he wasn’t sure what to tell you, not wanting to say something about your friend that could upset you. but the truth was, he wasn’t really interested in anyone right now. the recent breakup had done a number on him and he felt like he hadn’t properly moved on just yet. not when the thoughts were still obsessively circling in his head. but when choso was with you, they miraculously seemed to disappear, making him feel more at ease. “i’m not really looking for anything right now, sorry. i don’t really want to disappoint her, i’m just not really up for a relationship right now,” he told you truthfully, giving you an apologetic smile.

you stopped in your movements, nodding slightly in understanding. and still, it made your heart seize up for an unknown reason.

ps.: the story of how it takes reader and choso ages until they realize their feelings or alternatively: nobara and yuuji unwillingly turn into cupids

[angstyaches]

Why Do Bad Things Happen To Hungry People?

This is my first hunger fic in a very long time. How the hell are you supposed to title these things?!

It’s also the first ever fic from the Lucyverse, as I’ve decided to call it (basically, any fics that follow the day-to-day lives of Lucy’s flatmates).

CW: hunger, overworking, getting stuck on public transport.

___

Autumn waved as she entered the coffee shop, flinching as the little bell over the door went off to announce her arrival. She glanced up at it, gesturing with her palm for it to calm down, as though it should have somehow known she wasn’t a real customer. Payton’s heart skipped a beat as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and scampered away to an armchair by the window, not wanting to disturb her partner while they worked.

She was so freaking cute.

“Busy today?”

Payton tore their eyes off the back of Autumn’s head and turned to look at Jake, who had only started his supervisor shift five minutes ago. He was inspecting how much money was in the till as Payton laid out a fresh batch of muffins in the food case. The wafting scents of cinnamon and banana and chocolate were all so enticing that Payton could no longer ignore the fact that they’d had to work through lunch. Going an afternoon without food had left them with an ache in their stomach that had only been aggravated more by the stress of keeping the constant stream of customers satisfied. It had rained unexpectedly all afternoon, which had sent floods of park visitors running for shelter and warm drinks.

“Very,” Payton replied to Jake. “I don’t think we had any free tables for about four hours. We barely had time to wipe them down between customers.”

“Christ,” Jake grumbled, closing the till. “And you managed okay, even though Stephen called in sick?”

Payton gestured around themself, displaying the fact that nothing appeared to have burned down or crumbled. Part of them wanted to complain further about the toll the day had taken on them, but it felt better to just act confident about it. “Everything was fine. Nothing to worry about.”

“They should be paying you as a supervisor, you know,” Jake said. “I’ll talk to Anne about interviewing you.”

“Really? That would – that would be really cool.” Payton blushed, partly from the praise from their superior, but mostly because their stomach chose that moment to twist inside of them, releasing a long, rumbling growl. The music in the coffee shop was low and calming at this time of evening, but… maybe it would still muffle the sound?

When Jake double-glanced towards the front of Payton’s apron, it was clear that the music had muffled nothing.

“Sorry.” Payton placed a hand over their belly. “When Stephen couldn’t come, it meant I couldn’t take my lunch break.”

Jake frowned and glanced at his watch. “Your shift started at ten thirty, right? You haven’t had a break since then?”

Payton shook their head.

“Fuck it, go home. I’ll tell Anne you clocked out on time.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, you’ve only got another half-hour anyway, and the place is dead now.” Jake gestured to the room of thirty-six seats, of which only five were currently occupied. “Plus, your girl’s already here. No use in keeping her waiting.”

Payton was already wriggling out of their apron and heading for the door that led to the break room and lockers. “Thank you so much.”

Once they were in the break room, silence crashed over Payton like waves. The shop hadn’t been loud just now by any means, but they hadn’t been away from a din of any kind for almost ten hours. Their ears rang as they put their apron and work shoes in their locker and gulped a half-bottle of water that they found in there. The liquid hit their stomach like a solid lump of rock, but luckily it was lukewarm, and the discomfort didn’t linger for too long.

Payton didn’t linger either.

They tugged their jacket on over their buttoned shirt, wishing they’d brought something with a hood today, in case it decided to rain again before they made it to the tram. Maybe Autumn had thought to bring an umbrella, they reckoned, sighing in premature relief at the thought of her, waiting in the shop for them. They quickly pulled their headband off, brushing their dark bangs downwards and tossing the band into the locker for the next day.

As they pushed back through the door to the coffee shop, Payton felt like their feet had ceased to exist, leaving behind ankles that just floated through the air with a human body propped over them. They saw the back of Autumn’s head near the window, and they smiled to themself, momentarily forgetting the hunger and exhaustion and stress.

“See you tomorrow,” Jake called from behind the till.

Payton shot him a half-hearted salute, never slowing on their beeline to where Autumn was waiting. Well, it was less of a beeline than Payton would have liked; as though to personally inconvenience them, the coffee shop was full of tables and chairs and sofas, which needed to be manoeuvred around.

“Ooh!” Autumn exclaimed as arms snaked around her shoulders from behind the armchair. She dropped her book into her lap and reached up with one hand to tickle the back of Payton’s neck. “Hello, baby. Finished early?”

Payton mumbled an inaudible confirmation against her hair, not caring that they were probably messing up her ponytail. “How are you?”

“I’m good,” Autumn said. “A little tired.”

“Me too,” Payton sighed, lifting their head but remaining slumped against the back of the armchair. They felt a gentle cramping in their stomach as they reconsidered their answer. “And hungry.”

“Huh.” Autumn reached up and tapped her book against the top of Payton’s head. The gesture was unnecessarily gentle, as though she’d hit them with something thicker than a paperback print of Beckett’s Krapp’s Last Tape. “Well, luckily for you, I’ve got all the makings of your favourite waiting in your fridge.”

Payton’s stomach clenched again, their heart lifting slightly. It had been tricky to get Lucy to agree to it, but Autumn had her own key to the apartment; not only did she call around to visit Payton so often that she might as well have lived there too, but there were often issues at home that she opted to spend the night away from.

But that wasn’t the point right now.

“Your famous sausage rolls?” Payton sank even harder against the back of the armchair, partly to be dramatic, but partly because their body literally weakened a little at the notion of Autumn’s cooking.

Autumn smiled up at them from the cushions. “Pastry’s already made. Just got to assemble and bake them. I got us some oven chips too. Oh – I forgot to check if you had any beans in the cupboard, though.”

“We’re four college students; of course we’ve got beans in the cupboard,” Payton assured her, loudly enough to disguise the fact that their stomach was growling again as they pictured the dinner they hadn’t known awaited them.

“Excellent point.” Autumn scooped up the strap of her shoulder bag and slipped her book inside. She smoothed down the hem of her pinafore as she stood up. “Ready to go?”

“Way beyond ready,” Payton smiled, watching her scoop up the umbrella that was resting against the arm of the chair.

 ***

Payton wriggled uncomfortably in a scratchy tram seat, unable to find a relaxed position where they didn’t feel painful pressure building up in their stomach. It was really starting to ache, now that there was nothing to keep Payton’s mind busy. They would have loved nothing more than to be home already, biting into the flaky pastry and warm, soft filling of Autumn’s sausage rolls and finally getting something into their cramping belly.

“You alright, baby? You’re quiet.”

“Am I?” Payton laughed. Their head was spinning just a little, and their voice was starting to sound shaky. “Sorry, I’m just very tired.”

It didn’t feel good to lie to Autumn, even if it was less a lie and more a concealment of the truth. She would never say the words out loud, but Payton knew that she thought of them as a pushover, both in matters at work and at the apartment. There were a lot of aspects of their job that she called unacceptable, and if she’d had her way, they would have quit the coffee shop by now. They had no idea how she would react if they became a shift supervisor and had to take on even more responsibilities, but Payton reckoned that was a discussion for another night when things were a little more certain.

In the meantime, it was best not to say anything about having to skip lunch.

Slipping their hands into the pockets of their open jacket, Payton subtly rubbed their middle, feeling their empty stomach roll around in distress. They tensed and held their breath, hoping to prevent any noises from emerging.

There was a sharp jerking motion as the train slowed to a stop. Autumn gasped lightly and put out a hand to stop herself from sliding forward in her seat. They both looked at each other and held the gaze for a moment before a voice crackled over the tram’s intercom.

“Apologies, folks, it’s just a minor technical issue. Service will resume shortly.”

“Shortly?” Autumn mumbled in annoyance. “Talk about vague...”

“Damn it,” Payton sighed, sinking lower in their seat and pushing their hands deeper into the pockets of their jacket. “Why do bad things happen to good people?”

Autumn chuckled; she was still sitting fully upright, leaning towards Payton’s seat as she tried to see up to the top of the tram. “Assumptive of you to refer to yourself as good people.”

“Not me, baby. I was talking about you.”

“Oh. Aw. Thank you.” Autumn smiled and reached out a hand, both to acknowledge Payton and to give herself some balance as she craned her neck. 

The hand landed lightly on Payton’s belly, which - in their slumped position - acted as an almost-flat surface for her to lean on as she continued peering up through the carts. She was probably expecting to see tram staff coming through, explaining the situation to the passengers; what she probably wasn’t expecting was to feel rumbling movement beneath her palm, which was accompanied by a loud, pinched growl.

Payton let out a little groan too, turning their face to bury it against Autumn’s shoulder.

“What’s going on, baby?” Autumn half-laughed, her eyes trained on Payton’s stomach as it vibrated under her hand again. She teasingly ran a finger between the buttons in their shirt, gesturing as though to peek under the fabric. “You hiding an angry tiger in there?”

“I told you I was hungry.”

“Yeah, but...” Autumn gasped and rubbed a wide circle across Payton’s belly as it roared again, prompting them to glance around and make sure the seats close to them hadn’t magically filled up with people in the last few seconds.

Autumn, on the other hand, had had her attention drawn away from anything to do with the tram, and towards a particular, grumbling organ. “Baby, what’d you have for lunch?”

Payton groaned again, wriggling a little further down so that their knees were pressed against the seat in front of them. They felt a red blush in their cheeks as Autumn sat back and peered down at their face.

They sighed, eyes trailing down to where Autumn’s hand was still resting on their belly. “The shop was really busy today, and the shift supervisor couldn’t come in, so I ended up working through lunch.”

Payton then held their breath again, both in anticipation of their stomach letting out another whine under Autumn’s palm, and of her response.

“You’re so good, baby.”

Payton raised their eyebrows. “Am I? You’re not mad at me?”

“Of course I’m not mad at you,” Autumn sighed. “I obviously don’t like it when you don’t take care of yourself properly, but I also wish I had your level of dedication.”

A smile played on Payton’s lips as they nudged the side of their head against Autumn’s waist. “Jake’s gonna see about getting me bumped up to supervisor.”

“And he should,” Autumn laughed, lifting her other hand to sweep Payton’s eyes out of their eyes. “You’re amazing at that job, and no one ever tells you enough.”

“Really?”

“Really.” Autumn leaned down to kiss the side of Payton’s head. “Just promise me that you’ll use your powers as supervisor for good. Like giving yourself lunch breaks.” She gently tapped one finger against Payton’s stomach. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Payton mumbled, burying their face as their chest fluttered. The glow of being praised and worried about lasted only a precious moment though, because there was still an empty belly in the vicinity, and it was determined not to let itself be forgotten in all the chatter.

“You’re mad at Payton though, aren’t you?” Autumn pursed her lips as she spoke to their stomach, as though she was talking to a cat. She patted her hand against Payton’s belly as it grumbled. “That’s okay, I’d be mad too, if my owner spent the day giving yummy food to customers and not me.”

The mention of food sent Payton’s thoughts drifting back towards the dinner that had been promised, and they groaned again, this time nudging their head right into Autumn’s lap. She bit her lip and glanced around at the nearby seats, once more confirming that there was nobody else in the cart.

“Comfy down there?” There was a tiny twist of irony in Autumn’s voice, but her tone was mostly genuine. 

“Kind of,” Payton said, using both hands to keep Autumn’s pressed to their aching gut. They glanced up at the grey ceiling of the tram, at the darkness that lay just outside the window, hopelessness welling in their chest as their belly rolled unhappily. “Just so hungry.”

“Oh, baby. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I just wish I knew how long we were gonna be stuck here.”

“Me too,” Autumn sighed. “But no matter how long it takes us to get home, I’m still going to cook for you the minute we get in.”

“Mmm.” Payton smiled to themself and closed their eyes, letting go of Autumn’s hand as it began to work slow, gentle circles into their belly through their shirt. “Thank you.”

[juyoens]

odds | ksw

summary: you’ve believed in soulmates all your life. you’ve seen the people around you meet theirs, and you’ve always dreamed of the day you would meet yours. only problem is: your soulmate doesn’t believe in soulmates. pairing: kim sunwoo x reader, eric x reader if you squint genre: good ol’ soulmate au, fluff

Ever since you’ve discovered the meaning of the crescent moon on your wrist, all you could ever think about was when and how you were going to meet your soulmate. 

Could they be in another country? What were they like? Are they tall or short? How do they like their eggs in the morning? What’s their biggest fear?

Every possible question, you were certain you’ve asked your soulmate in your head at some point. The idea of someone being out there, who’s been pre-determined by the universe to be the one for you was one of the most fascinating, beautiful things you’ve ever heard of. It was the reason why you loved the idea of it so much, and why you were so determined in finding yours. 

But the idea is making you grow extremely impatient, desperate almost.

“What are you thinking about, Y/N?” you’re snapped out of your daydream when you hear Eric’s voice, his arm snaking around your shoulder as he sits down beside you.

You simply let out a huff, looking back down at your notebook and trying to go back to reviewing. Eric knows you better than anyone and immediately knew what you were thinking about, simply letting out a chuckle as he reassuringly rubbed your shoulder.

“Don’t be like that. You know, my mom told me her sister met hers when she was like, I don’t know, 30?” 

Although Eric was obviously trying to make you feel better, you couldn’t help but feel even more upset.

“Yeah, Eric, what if I meet my soulmate when I’m 60?!” you hiss, earning a few shushes from the other people at the library, causing you two to sit up straight and mutter your apologies.

“Ok, not the best example! But come on, Y/N. It’s not everything! That doesn’t mean you can’t go out and date! There are people who still haven’t met theirs, like me!” he whispers.

“I guess so,” you sigh. “Sorry. It just sucks, y’know? Look around us, most of these people are soulmates,” you continue, turning your head to scan the library with Eric trying to follow your gaze.

Your eyes land on Choi Chanhee and Kim Younghoon, who sat just a few tables in front of you two. You frown at the sight of Younghoon leaning his head on Chanhee’s shoulder as he studied, pointing at the two to Eric. 

“See, over there! Chanhee and Younghoon. I asked Chanhee all about it. They’re the real deal, Eric! They have the same infinity symbol on their arms.” you whisper-yelled, but Eric only shrugs, turning his attention back on you.

“Alright, good for them then. But still, don’t rush it! You still have the rest of college to figure it out.” he raised his eyebrows at you. Eric was right. Maybe you were just overthinking too much about it. 

“Now cheer up, Y/N! You’re wonderful, amazing and you have a good heart. I’m sure even if you don’t meet your soulmate until you’re like 80 you’ll have many people who will date you! Or even marry you. I mean, who knows, maybe this whole thing isn’t real and everyone just has a really weird birthmark that they share with someone.” he joked, earning him a playful hit from you to his bicep.

You let out a deep, gloomy sigh as you rest your chin on your hand, turning your head to see Eric now on his phone, a smile plastered across his face as he watched some video on Twitter. 

He sure is handsome, isn’t he? you thought to yourself, Eric noticing your gaze and flashing you a bright smile. “Why? Is something wrong?”

You shake your head and get back to whatever you were reading, hearing a small giggle coming from him as he turns his attention back to his phone.

Eric has always been someone who made you feel loved and reassured. And maybe, just maybe, if this entire soulmate thing isn’t for you, it’s him who you’d want to spend your days with.

The constant reassurance from your friends made you feel bad, having them constantly remind you to stop stressing over your soulmate. 

It was childish, you can admit that, but you simply couldn’t help yourself. Were you doing something wrong? Does everyone really have it?

You stared blankly at the busy street from inside your usual cafe spot, drifting off once again as your mind restlessly thought about university, and among other things. 

Suddenly, you hear someone lightly tap your shoulder, startling you and making you look up to see who it is, seeing the part timer with your order in hand. “Sorry. Here you go,” 

You give him a small smile, about to thank him, until you see the exact same crescent moon on his wrist as he sets down your drink on the table. You didn’t have time to even process the whole thing. This was it. This was the moment you’ve been waiting for.

“Wait!” you exclaim, and he stares back at you with startled, wide eyes. “I’m Y/N.”

“What? Oh. I’m Sunwoo. Is there something wrong with your order?”

You aren’t quite sure how to break it to him in a way that won’t sound creepy. It would be odd to straight up just tell him you two were meant to be together, wouldn’t it?

“I don’t...want to be weird. But can I just ask, have you met your soulmate?”

He’s taken aback by the question, and it takes a while for him to respond. “No, I haven’t.”

You nod, and you pull back your sleeve to show him the same crescent moon on your wrist.

“I’m sorry, I think you have the wrong person.” he coldly says, seemingly unfazed by it, politely giving you a small bow before going back inside the counter.

Your smile falters and your skin goes pale. You were sure you had the right person. It wasn’t possible. It was the exact same crescent moon, and there was no way there could’ve been more than one person you shared the tattoo with.

You sat with Eric and Haknyeon at the university cafeteria, still upset at the unfortunate encounter that happened the day before. 

“Something wrong?” Eric asks. 

You frown, looking back at the two boys whose faces were filled with concern. “I met my soulmate.”

“Y/N!” the two of them gasp. “You’ve been waiting for this since like, forever! But what’s with the long face?” Haknyeon pouts, cocking his head to the side.

“I know! It’s just...it’s just that he told me I had the wrong person. Which is impossible! There’s no way I would have the wrong person. I saw the mark with my own two eyes!” you rant, frustrated.

“Maybe he just wasn’t ready?” Eric suggests. “Maybe he just panicked?” Haknyeon adds, leaning his head on Eric’s shoulder.

Before you could respond, you look over and recognition dawns on your face when you suddenly see your soulmate, walking over to the vending machine. 

“Holy shit, he goes here.” you breathe out, the two boys looking back to try and see what you were looking at. 

“That’s him?” Eric turns back to you with raised eyebrows. You nod. “Speak of the devil,” he utters.

You immediately got up and approached him despite Eric and Haknyeon’s protests for you to stay seated.

“Hey! It’s me, Y/N. The one from yesterday!” you call out, and he turns to look at you with a blank stare, freezing as soon as he sees you right in front of him. “.....Hey.”

“I think we should, uh, talk.” you stammered. He quirked an eyebrow at you. “About yesterday? When I told you we were….y’know....”

He simply nodded, taking your hand and leading you outside.

“Listen, Y/N,” he lets go and lets out a deep sigh. “I don’t believe in soulmates.” he gives you an apologetic look.

You’re unsure what to say at that moment. It felt like you were a kid getting told Santa Clause isn't real, or something.

“Could you...tell me what you mean by that?” you faltered. “I just don’t believe in it. Sure we have the same mark, but that’s not for sure. What if soulmates are just platonic? Or this is just some weird mark? I really don’t believe in it, Y/N.”

“Maybe. But you’re only saying that because you haven’t met yours yet! And I’m right here,” you gulp. “Not that I’m saying we should date. I’m just saying we should be friends!”

Sunwoo is clearly hesitant, not seeming to listen to your reasoning. He nibbled on his bottom lip for a while, before reaching his hand out to you. 

Your face lights up and you smile brightly, shaking his hand. “Friends it is then.”

Eric and Haknyeon seemed unfavored at the idea, feeling as if Sunwoo wasn’t genuine in being friends with you and only doing it because you said so.

And it really was like that at first, something you secretly knew deep down and something Sunwoo felt horrible for.

Waiting for him to finish his shift at the cafe; which wasn’t a problem for you at all since it had been your usual cafe spot; helping him catch up and study for exams, such and such.

It was like that for months, slowly trying to get Sunwoo to open up to you and see you as a newly found friend he could rely on rather than someone he needed to hang out with just because he had the same crescent moon on his wrist. 

However, you felt stuck. You were growing frustrated now that you’ve learned something you’ve dreamed almost all your life wasn’t as ideal as you’d thought it would be. Sure you felt happy to just be in Sunwoo’s presence, but you felt as if you were talking to a wall sometimes. Aren’t soulmates supposed to have some connection?

Eric soon found his soulmate, and you couldn’t help but feel upset whenever you would constantly listen to him go on and on about his, how much they had in common and how they make his heart skip a beat whenever they do practically anything. You wanted to be happy for him, he was your best friend after all, but you couldn’t help but feel annoyed. 

You sat in the empty dimly lit cafe, watching Sunwoo replace the open sign on the cafe door to a closed sign. 

“Aren’t you going home?” he says as he took off his apron, sitting down right across from you. You shook your head.

He nods, and the cafe is engulfed in awkward, uncomfortable silence.

“Can I tell you something?” Sunwoo suddenly speaks up. “That’s a first,” you remark, almost passively aggressively. “You're upset with me.” he pouts.

“I know I’ve been giving you a hard time. Eric told me all about how much this whole soulmate thing meant to you. I’m sorry you’re stuck with me,” he says with a sense of guilt.

"I really appreciate you always being there when i need a hand. I do admit I was shitty to you. But my thoughts about you has completely changed.”

“I guess, what I’m trying to say is,” Sunwoo leans closer. “Go on a date with me.”

A strange feeling of excitement filled you as you heard the words spill out of his mouth. You weren’t stuck like you thought after all.

“Oh I’ll show you it’s real, alright.”

[furblrwurblr]

Moppet!Douxie x GN!Reader, Soulmate AU | Hurt/Comfort, Fluff

Warnings: Fire/Explosion, lots of crying, self esteem issues, misunderstandings cause a lot of emotional turmoil

Note: This is my first fic! I know fics have it worse than art, but if you'd consider leaving tips in the comments, I'd be super grateful! Thanks for taking a look!

It was springtime in Camelot, near the turn of the season. The sun was high, the birds were singing, and you... were late. As a magic user, your life was in constant jeopardy regardless of your employment as the Crowmaster, Crowlord Corbin’s apprentice, penning and sending letters for the kingdom. And in this kingdom, tardiness was not appreciated. Racing through the castle halls with the king’s letters in hand, you noticed movement on your forearms.

“I wonder what color their eyes are. I bet they’re lovely.”

Your lips curled in a tender smile at the curling words that appeared on your skin. Similar musings crossed your soulmate’s mind daily, not leaving your body free of the enigmatic “ink” for years.

No one, not even the renowned Merlin Ambrosius, knew the precise nature of the words that would mark people’s skin, only that they were your soulmate’s thoughts about you. Soulmates were a fickle thing, their connections varying with different cultural beliefs and changing as countries developed. In England, the written words made finding your soulmate a tad difficult as one couldn’t know if their other half was paying any mind when they tried to share personal details. It was said that once you know them wholly, you’re complete in all things. Whatever that means.

You’d once been impatient to meet your own, to know what it means to be complete, but after years of black markings coming and going, covering your body in kind words of admiration, you deemed them worth the wait.

You were shocked from your reverie in a flutter of parchment. You’d bumped into someone, the king’s letters falling to the ground right into… was that slorr juice? You didn’t even apologize to the raven-haired young man whose spell material you’d just gotten all over the floor. You were far too panicked.  Knowing your animal magic was of no help here, you scrambled to salvage what you could.

Hisirdoux was in trouble. Merlin would have his head when he told him he lost the slorr juice to another bout of soulmate pondering, and have it again when he discovered that said juice is the reason the king didn’t receive his news regarding the upcoming royal summit. Douxie leaned forward to help but instead opted to frantically search his brace for anything that could help the poor apprentice in front of him.

When he’d finally found the rune, the Crowmaster had just finished shaking off what liquid they could from the sensitive documents. He quickly dried them hoping to save the ink on them as best he could, long fingers flitting over each. In a hurried frenzy of apologies and farewells, the hallway was emptied.

Merlin was less than pleased, and frankly, a little concerned. Douxie usually gets so cautious after a mistake that even Merlin feels his stress, but this was the third time this week. Why was he so focused on his soulmate? After a right scolding, Douxie retired to his room to study. Merlin nearly did a double-take at what was written on his young apprentice’s neck.

“He was quite kind.”

So they’d met. Did his soulmate know? Did Douxie know?

Over the next few weeks, you two kept running into one another. A passing here, an acknowledgment there. After about a month you’d come to look forward to seeing the boy trip over himself en route to Merlin’s study. You helped him carry supplies when the Crowlord was away and talked when he dropped off Merlin’s letters to the court magicians across England. For some reason, you found yourself hanging on his every word and smiling whenever you caught a glimpse of his adorable manbun weaving through the streets.

He felt the same. It was never enough to speak to you in passing and he even left long conversations with you feeling wanting. He doesn’t quite remember how he started, but it’d become a habit to watch you work through the large western tower window. He’d admire your tenderness with the crows and was warmed by your bond with your hawk familiar. 

As you left the tower to retire for the night, he always thought you might be cold, but never gathered the courage to walk you to your chambers.

Douxie was concerned. The day was halfway through, winter clouds covering the high sun, and you were nowhere to be seen. He’d watched you enter the western tower at dawn and the candlelight hadn’t been extinguished once. He was principally done with Merlin’s tasks for the day, perhaps he could pop his head in? “just for a minute,” he decided. 

He exited his chambers (Merlin’s storage closet) and rapped a knuckle on his master’s desk, pulling his attention from some blueprints. Merlin didn’t speak, just gave an expectant look.

Douxie ran a near-trembling hand through his tied black hair before cautiously speaking up. “Master, may I have the rest of the day off?”

“Whatever brought this on? After the way you’ve been acting these past months?”

Douxie averted his gaze, suddenly finding his shoes far more interesting. “I’d… I’d like to see someone today.”

After a beat, the master wizard quickly scribbled something down on a piece of parchment and handed it to the boy.

“Finish these and I’ll consider your time served for the day,” Merlin sighed.

Douxie had been sure he would shut down. He quickly snatched the list and ran to the door, uttering a rushed ‘thank you master’ before it shut behind him. Merlin watched him leave, fondness in his eyes.

The sun was just dipping past the high kingdom walls, turning the town a vibrant orange. Douxie hung the herbs he’d just gathered, heaving a sigh of great relief when the last one was in place. He raced across the west side, eager to visit his… friend? Is that who you were to him? He banished the thought as he came upon the west tower, dark eyebrows shooting up in surprise. Citizens, a lot of them, stood in a line from the tower out down the hallway. 

“What’s going on?” he asked a young woman.

“I’m here with my children, the Crowmaster is penning wishlists for Saint Nick. Just a shilling each!” 

Douxie nodded and thanked her, then made his way to the tower. He gently pushed past the mob gathered in the doorway, stammering apologies. At last, he reached the Crowlord’s desk. The man himself was nowhere to be seen and you were alone, writing away at the whim of an excited child. He caught a glimpse of your face, you looked tired. Had you really been doing this all day?

Exhausted wasn’t a big enough word to describe how you felt. The only thing keeping you going was reading the various forms of concern written on your skin. By now, you knew you’d met them, but you couldn’t place who it could be. However, thinking was only making you more fatigued as your aching wrist swept across the parchment.

Douxie said nothing, just pulled out the Crowlord’s chair, and sat down. You looked at him, eyes wide, but the only explanation offered was a kind smile. He picked up a quill and called out for the next person to step forward. You turned back to the young girl asking for a sword, your smile wide and heart swelling.

By the time you two finished, the sun was half past the horizon. The last patron left the tower and you both heaved a sigh of relief.

“I can’t than-” 

“Um, do you think-” 

You looked at one another and laughed, waiting for the other to speak. Douxie hesitated, then took a deep breath. 

“Uhm, do you think you’ve some time? I’d like to show you something,” he asked, lifting his eyes to your face.

“Sure,” you replied, smiling and holding out your elbow.

He beamed, quickly grabbing two pieces of parchment, a quill, and an inkwell. You raised a brow but let him be as he threaded your arm through his and started walking.

The young wizard’s apprentice couldn’t bring himself to speak, he was far too nervous. Thankfully, you found the silence comfortable as he led you up a winding staircase at the corner of the castle. Once you both reached the top, he gestured to the sea. It was breathtaking. The salty breeze floated through your hair as you admired the sun’s glow over the water and the colors of twilight.

Douxie broke the quiet. “I thought you’d like this. Hmm, it isn’t enough light to write by though.” He waved his hand, sending blue wisps to swirl around you both. You watched them float about, eyes finally landing on Douxie who was making himself comfortable in a crenel, placing the supplies he’d brought with him on the merlon in front of him. You settled across from him, reaching for the quill.

His slender hand caught yours and laid in on the stone, gently massaging your wrist. “You’ll injure yourself at this rate. Let someone else write for you today.” His gaze caught yours, hazel eyes full of concern, and… something else you couldn’t place.

A gentle smile spread across your face as you reveled in the sun on your skin and the breeze on your lips. Douxie shuffled his papers around and spoke up again a moment later.

“So! What’s your wish?” Douxie asked, smiling wide.

“What?” you said, puzzled.

Douxie rose a brow, pointing out “All today, has anyone penned you a wishlist?”

“I suppose not,” you said, the smile settling back onto your face.

He beamed and set the quill to the parchment again. “Fantastic. Not that I think it’s fantastic no one’s offered, I’m just glad I get to- oh, I never even asked. I should have asked first, I’m so sorry-,” His shoulders tensed, but he stopped abruptly when he felt your hand on his.

“Hisirdoux, thank you. I’d love it if you did, there’s no need to worry.”

You started telling him things you wanted for Christmas and conversation flowed from there. Teasing banter and loud laughter filled the sky as it turned to night, blue magic floating around you both excitedly in time with your synchronized heartbeats as he finally walked you to your chambers, even offering you his hood. What could he do? He thought you looked cold.

It was just past noon on Christmas day. The ground sparkled a bright white and children’s laughter rang through the air. You took a deep breath of the crisp air and let it out in a contented sigh, taking a sip of the warm cider your master bought you before he left to celebrate with his family. He invited you to join them, but you opted to celebrate it yourself. You placed the cider on the table next to the window you were sitting in and picked up the small wood block you were fashioning into a present for Douxie. The small wooden cat-dragon only needed his hind leg to be freed from its timber prison. It wasn’t perfect, but it’s the thought that counts. As you worked, sentences curled up your arms and swirling letters kissed the base of your fingers. You paused your whittling with a frown. The only feeling behind this gift was love. You’d accepted you loved Douxie after that night bathed in twilight and lonely smiles, but you felt so incredibly twisted about it. You’d already met your soulmate and they thought about you often. Did your soulmate also worry they’d fallen in love with the wrong person? You shook your head, clearing your mind at the sound of wingbeats. Your hawk familiar landed on your raised knee and began to preen themself, looking at you smugly through pristine feathers.

“I can feel you overthinking things from across the castle,” they spoke, masking concern under teasing.

You scoffed, knowing they were right. “What am I meant to do? I can’t go on like this when I’ve got a soulmate out there. I can’t even try, it’s against the law! They know we’re bonded, what if they see me with him? I don’t want to hurt them like that. Not to mention, what if he’s not perfect for me? I want the soulbond to experience all of another person, but should I give that up for love?”

Your familiar shook their head and flew away, leaving you with your question hanging in the air. Watching them leave, you noticed someone walking towards the slorr’s stable. The manbun was too recognizable for there to be a shred of doubt: Douxie was being put to work on Christmas Day. You turned the wooden Archie in your hand and pushed off the windowsill. Just because you love him doesn’t mean you can’t stay friends.

Douxie was in flux. Archie saw the boy’s neutral expression turn sour as he read what he could of his soulmate’s thoughts. They loved someone else? Would they give him up for someone they’d already met? He couldn’t exactly criticize, he was in the same boat. Y/N was so important to him, but if he found his soulmate, could he quell the confusing little thing they had together for someone he barely knew? He decided he’d understand if his soulmate didn’t love him, he’d want them to do the same. He loved Y/N too much to let them go.

He looked up from his arm and startled. You were waiting for him, leaning against the slorr’s gate, your hawk familiar preening themself. While you laughed at his absentmindedness, he frantically rolled his ¾ sleeves down over the words that betrayed his true heart. 

“Y-Y/N! W-what are you doing here? Aren’t you- um, aren’t you meant to be celebrating?” Douxie stammered out as his heart rate slowed. 

You pushed off the gate and grabbed the pail he was holding in his hands that were still light with adrenaline. “I am! I opted not to celebrate with Master Corbin and his family, take the day for myself and see where it leads,” you said, a hopeful grin rising to your lips.

Douxie broke into a giddy smile, his heart afloat. They had all of Christmas to enjoy the town and they were here with him? He couldn’t believe his fortune. “Then I’m glad it led you here!” he exclaimed. 

Archie curled himself around your leg, butting his dark head into your calf. “Are you here to enjoy the show?” he asked with a purr. 

Your laugh was the only thing keeping Douxie from strangling his bespectacled familiar, so he settled for a pout you internally cooed at. 

Both of you paused in front of the gate, reluctant to enter. He swung it open with a bow. “Ladies first.”

“Cheeky,” you said to him over your shoulder.

Archie and your familiar started playing with one another as you two prepared to take on the slorr together.

Hm. This was a mess. The slorr seemed to enjoy the happy atmosphere you’d both created so she was a tad more cooperative, but it took longer for her to calm down. You and Douxie were covered head to toe in the glowing blue liquid, trying to remove what you could into the pail Merlin gave him. Your shared laughter slowed to silence as you noticed him staring at you, eyes slowly roving over your face. Did he look… sad? No, that wasn’t it. Before you could scrutinize him further, you felt it. Gentle fingers caressing your cheek, going up, up… Your breath hitched as he laid his palm to your cheek, thumb slowly moving across your face. You let out a shaky breath and he jolted, noticing your wide eyes fixed on his and quickly withdrawing his hand.

He shook some juice from his hand and gesticulated wildly, stammering through an apology. “You- you had some juice on your cheek, I’m so sorry, Merlin’s tower, I shouldn’t have done that-”

“It’s okay, really. Thanks for getting it for me,” you interrupted. You wanted to say more, but his sleeve had risen in his fervor, swirling lines reminding you he wasn’t yours to comfort. Hisirdoux was such an emotional and empathetic being, he wouldn’t leave his soulmate. Especially since his soulmate would have to be an absolute saint, it’s no less than he deserved. Taking a deep breath in, you looked back at him. “Don’t bite your lips, you’ll chap them. Was that your last task for the day?”

Douxie released his lip, fighting the urge to continue chewing it. “It was, and I’ve no clue how I’m going to use the rest of the afternoon,” he said, watching as his familiar and yours playfully wrestled for a mouse.

Your heart leaped, this was your chance! “How would you like to spend it together? There are tons of things to do in town and I’ve saved up my pay for a while so I’ve some wiggle room. Not to mention, I’ve made you something.”

The nervous cloud around you both dissolved as Douxie eagerly agreed and begged you to reveal what you had for him. You denied him with a laugh, smile widening with his every impatient groan. Your familiars ran ahead of you both, swirling in a frenzy of playful fighting and laughter as you walked out of the castle, arm-in-arm.

The town was a sight to behold. Holly curled around door frames, red berries nestled among twisted wreaths. Mistletoe hung from building corners, tracks disrupted the perfect layers of fresh snow, and children weaved and ducked through throngs of people gathered around street musicians. Snowballs were flying at the end of every street, laughter and song floating in the air with the excited chatter of families buying wares for their families, and lines of crushed berries stained the ground. It was an English tradition to wish to meet your soulmate sooner by spreading holly berries in a line on Christmas as a nod to the Chinese legends of the soulstring, a red string that connected soulmates there. Sure, it made a mess of your shoes but you always found it cute.

The first few minutes were unsure, both of you fishing for ideas on what to do first. Archie and your familiar were already deep in conversation, but you and Douxie were struggling. That is, until, the smell of sweet buns reached him. His stomach let out a mighty grumble, a testament to how he’d been working for longer than you and likely hadn’t eaten lunch yet. He covered his pale face with his free hand, too embarrassed to bear seeing you fight a rising smile. You slid your hand down his forearm and grasped his cold fingers, pulling him towards the source of the heavenly aroma. A fiery blush rose to his ears when he registered your fingers lacing with his while you waited in line. Reaching the front, Douxie’s protests fell on deaf ears as you swatted his hands away, insisting you’d pay. The baker gave a soft smile and handed you two of the high coveted baked goods, bidding you both a happy Christmas. Just two apprentices walking hand in hand, browsing stalls, eating together, and enjoying one another's company.

Douxie heard something on the wind and perked up. Lively music came from the town square and Douxie wasn’t about to miss the chance to dance with you. He pulled you from the daggers you were eyeing, making a note of which you lingered on before pulling you close and weaving through the other partygoers. Soon enough, you made it to the musicians, seeing the space before them where a group was dispersing as the song ended. The vocalist started up again, solo for a few lines until the band swelled. Douxie bounced on his heels, recognizing the tune as The Bear and the Maiden Fair. His excitement sent a wave of courage through him and he slipped his fingers from yours, instead grabbing you by the wrist to drag you to the open space.  Others joined, forming a circle. Claps and stomps interrupted the smooth movement of the ring. Laughter mixed with the joyful notes of the flute. Hisirdoux couldn’t stop looking at your joined hands, sometimes lifting his gaze to your eyes closed in a laugh. When the vocalist reached the line “lifted her high into the air”, Douxie broke his hand away from the person opposite you, lifted you by the waist, and spun. Your clothes fluttered and for a moment, you were weightless. Douxie’s laughter rang in your ears, lingering just like the feeling of his fingers intertwined with yours. His hands were warm and firm on your midsection, the heat replaced with a chill as he set you down. You absently continued the dance, happiness clouding the passage of time. Douxie kept your hand in his, allowing your arms to fall to your sides. You looked at each other, breathless smiles lingering on your faces as the song changed once more. You both walked on, catching your breath and coming down from the high.

A few hours later, you’d both had more interaction with each other than you’d had with anyone else all year. It was a welcome break from the same hallways, the same people, and the same routines. You’d bought each other dinner, talked about everything under the sun, and danced through seemingly all of Camelot, only separating for maybe an hour to buy gifts that may or may not have been for one another.

The day was coming to a close, the sun once again a deep vermillion, the snow reflecting it like gems. As you were heading back to the castle, you passed a holly berry stall. Douxie saw you looking at it, sobered by the reminder you were both promised to complete strangers. Just today, he’d fallen so much more in love with you than he thought possible, and if you wanted your soulmate, who was he to deny you? He tugged on your arm, wordlessly offering a pound to the vendor. The woman raised a brow at your intertwined fingers but offered the small basket of berries without a question. You looked at him quizzically when he drew his hand from yours, pouring a good amount into his hand and giving you the remainder. Enjoying the bittersweet silence, you two took turns placing the berries in a line. Archie swatted your familiar’s eager beak from the line of red that was stark against the slow-melting snow. Once you’d finished, Douxie sent you a sad smile and asked if you’d like to exchange gifts in his chambers. You agreed, once again arm-in-arm, streets quiet except for the soft crunching of snow beneath your heavy feet and the pound of heavy hearts.

Hisirdoux lit all his candles as the sun peeked just over the horizon. Archie made himself comfortable on his wizard’s pillow, curling around a tired hawk familiar. Your own wizard associate preened themselves while you and Doux sat on the bed, eventually opting to preen Archie when they were satisfied. Archie let out a yelp when she preened the edge of his ear, earning a look from you. Douxie pulled out a handful of items from his satchel with a flourish and showed you all the things he’d found one by one. Polish for Lancelot’s sword, a garlic braid for one of Galahad’s more ambitious brews, cooked salmon for Archie, and other things spread out in front of him.

He gave a nervous smile. “Close your eyes,” he breathed.

You smiled as your eyes slid shut. His slim, cold fingers touched your hand, causing goosebumps to rise on your arm as he pressed something small into your palm.

“And… open!” He slid his hands from yours and into his lap, an expectant look on his long face. Looking down, you gasped. There laid a ring that looked to be made of vines, weaving around each other and wrapping around the base of a tiny white flower.

“I found a curltrap in the forest on my last herb run and thought you might like it, so I made it into a ring. It won’t wilt. Um… do you? Like it, I mean,” he asked, brows pinching.

You slipped it on and looked at him in awe. Leaning forward, you softly put your arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. “Douxie, it’s beautiful. No one’s ever given me such a thoughtful gift, thank you for making it.” He laid his hands on your back and laid his face in the crook of your neck to return the gesture, hand trailing after when you pulled away.

“Your turn!” You reached into your bag and paused. “Close your eyes.”

Douxie pouted but held his hand out after doing as he was told. He felt something hard and contoured, slowly curling his long fingers around it. He opened his eyes and stared at it in awe. It was wood whittled in Archie’s likeness, complete with small green gems for eyes and tiny glasses frames made of wire. His wings were unfurled, his posture inquisitive. Archie looked at it, speechless.

“I wasn’t sure what you’d like so I played it safe. When I told the carpenter it was for you he offered to inlay the gems for free. You’re more appreciated than you think!” you exclaimed with a smile. He whispered a “thank you” as he turned it over in his hands, admiring the details. In all honesty, he’d already committed every dip and groove to memory, he was just replaying your words in his mind. “You’re more appreciated than you think!” He never thought about the impact he had on others, he was too busy being concerned with Merlin’s opinion of him. That’d be something he’d have to work on if it made you smile like that.

The rest of the evening flew by, laughter and the sound of a lute seeping through Douxie’s chamber door and into Merlin’s study. By now you’d fallen asleep on his bed having drifted off while Douxie softly sang a folk lullaby you’d requested. He lifted the blanket over you and laid down, the blanket layered between you two. He stared at you while you slept, soaking you in. The shadows your eyelashes cast on your cheeks. Your chest rising and falling in tandem with his. The black lines swirling to your collarbone- wait. Douxie watched as a thought appeared on your skin, hidden under your shirt. Archie moved in circles at the foot of the bed and stopped abruptly feeling Douxie’s sudden fear. He was so tempted to look but he couldn’t risk you hating him… it’s just to see what they think of you. To see if they deserve you. Yeah, that was a viable excuse. Archie hissed quietly at his friend, watching Douxie’s trembling fingers gingerly expose the skin towards your shoulder. He looked at the two words, puzzled. “They’re breathtaking.” Did they see you in the square? Had it been when you’d separated? Douxie was torn from his own thoughts when you made a noise, your brow furrowing for a moment and relaxing. His hand still had your collarbone exposed, and he watched in equal parts elation and horror as his own thought scrawled itself onto your skin.

“I don’t know if I can let you go.”

His blood ran cold, breath hitching and mind flailing. 

You were his. You were fated to be his. But you loved someone else.

Spring had returned to Camelot, plants thriving in the sun’s warmth. The flowers were happy, fluttering in the sea breeze. You furrowed your brow when your heart clenched at the thought of such beautiful blossoms mocking you. A shadow passed over your face as you looked to the flower that still curled itself around your finger. It’d been three months since the best Christmas you’d ever had, but the memory was now stained. Douxie and you still talked, but for some reason, he made excuses to avoid you and felt distant when you were able to cajole him into a short walk. At first, it seemed like he was busy with the amulet, but then he was absent even when Merlin said he was stuck and didn’t require his apprentice’s help. You were disappointed and confused, feeling hurt every time he blew you off with some excuse of running errands for Merlin.

Hisirdoux wasn’t feeling any better. He missed you greatly and seeing what you thought of his excuses only deepened his guilt. But wasn’t this what you wanted? Why would you be so disappointed he wouldn’t spend as much time with you if you loved someone else? He chalked it up to the soulmate bond, ignoring Archie’s concern and attempts at advice. His eyes were sunken in and puffy, due in part to crying himself to sleep watching your pain at his sudden distance write itself on his skin. He’d go to bed with swirling lines of magical ink torturing his dreams and awake a blank slate, ready for it to start all over again. 

Archie couldn’t take this. For the past week, he’d been pushing his magic through their psychic bond, pouring parts of a sleep spell into his charge, but that would only work for so long. Douxie was destroying himself from the inside out, all because he couldn’t be selfish for once and speak up. The shifter waited for Douxie to leave for the day, telling him he’d find him at noon. Archie stayed in front of the door until the young man’s voice faded. He sighed, whispering an apology. Douxie wouldn’t want anyone to know, but the boy needed an intervention.

“Merlin? We need to talk.”

Merlin had noticed Douxie’s exhaustion and had purposefully lightened his load, but the boy kept working regardless. Merlin thought less work could allow him to spend more time with the Crowmaster (who at this point couldn’t be anyone BUT Douxie’s soulmate considering how quickly they bonded and how much time they spent together), but he’d come back to his study to see the books sorted a different way every week, the suits of armor impossibly polished, and the herb rack overflowing with all kinds of magical flora. As Archie relayed the events of the past few months, Merlin felt his chest constrict tighter and tighter. His heart bled for the boy, growing angry at just how oblivious you both were. And then, an idea. Not one of his best or subtlest, but it’d get the job done fast and serve as a bit of punishment for confusing his apprentice’s heart.

It was that time of year again. The yearly royal summit had you and the Crowlord running circles around one another, both of you rapidly penning and sending letters and the occasional need to coerce the grumpiest crow, Corvus, to carry just one more letter for the day. Between your familiar’s regular several-day flights to Spain, your scurrying around the castle, and the magic you were giving the crows for some extra juice, you were exhausted. Your eyes were sunken, you weren’t sleeping properly, and you missed Douxie. You didn’t know why, but his absence made your heart hurt. Every time you collected letters from Merlin, your throat closed at seeing his apprentice’s chamber door. Catching a glimpse of him through doorways and windows made your mouth dry. Both Master Corbin and Galahad had noticed your change in attitude, asking you to rest and why Douxie wasn’t with you, confused why you were no longer attached by the hip. You were tired. Everything fell by the wayside as you rushed from official to official. The king himself was concerned for you. Well, as concerned as he was willing to be towards a mage. 

Finally, there was a lull. You were able to rest for a while but didn’t dare leave the tower, knowing something would pop up eventually. Sitting down for what felt like the first time in weeks, you let everything go. The “mother hen” of the tower crows, Corinth, coaxed it out of you bit by bit until the dam burst. She preened your scalp while you cried, hot tears rolling down your twisted features. The feeling was comforting, helping to ease your upset. Finally, you were able to speak. 

“...I love him, Corinth. I don’t know how I hurt him and I don’t know how to fix it, but I love him. He isn’t mine and he never will be, I know it, I do, so why does it still hurt so much?”  you whimpered, drawing your knees to your chest.

“Perhaps he’s blind,” she said sagely.

“He can see perfectly well,” you whispered with an insincere chuckle, still not trusting your ability to speak without breaking down again.

Her eyes glinted in the noontime sun. “Stupid, then.”

You laughed, eyes crinkling and forcing tears that were left on your lashes to fall. “Douxie may well be stupid, but he isn’t simple. It’s one of his many charms.” A soft smile lingered on your face, heart lighter than before. “Thank you Corinth, you listen well.”

She shook out her plumage and settled on your knees, cuddling into your bosom. You stroked her gently, the silence pushing in on your curled form.

༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓

Poor Hisirdoux was in flux again. He sat on his bed turning the wooden Archie over in his hands. Merlin had left not too long ago and given him the day. Douxie’s hands felt light without a task. Come to think of it, his head felt light too. He couldn’t sleep yet, but he desperately needed a pick-me-up. A sigh escaped him when he realized his basin was nearly empty. He’d wanted something to do so he might as well refill it. Upon picking up the basin he dropped it immediately, water splashing violently across the floor along with the clatter of wood on stone. Archie yowled, shifting into his dragon form. The boy’s eyes were wide in horror as he recalled his reflection in the water. You see, in England, not only are the words of a soulmate tie important, but their placing on the skin holds equal meaning. Douxie had only ever gotten them on his limbs and the base of his skull when he was younger, but ever since he met Y/N, they began showing on his torso and the left side of his chest. But this… this couldn’t mean anything good. Scrawled black lines, no longer smooth and flourished, curled around his throat. They began from seemingly nowhere and writhed downwards in a creeping spiral, the end reaching for his heart. 

“Arch!” he cried. “What’s happening? Why are they like this? What do they say? Arch, Arch, please I need to know what’s wrong!” Tears welled in his hazel eyes as he dragged his hands down his throat, futilely trying to smudge the twisted lines.

Archie felt his fear so strongly his back arched on its own accord, but he found his way to Douxie quickly. He scampered to the boy just as he fell to his knees, his mind nothing but questions. Archie shifted, paws pulling Douxie’s frantic hands into his lap as he curled his wings around the boy’s shoulders. He sniffed and shuddered to a halt, shaky breaths drawing in and out as he lifted his head for Archie to read the swirling text.

Archie’s reaction to your thoughts was well hidden. He knew you two loved each other, but this hurt him just as much as it did Douxie. “...I love him, Corinth. I don’t know how I hurt him and I don’t know how to fix it, but I love him. He isn’t mine and he never will be, I know it, I do, so why does it still hurt so much?” The next bit made him breathe a laugh, but he realized that while it wouldn’t be easy to tell Douxie just how much you were both hurt by each other’s assumptions, it was just the proof he needed. Archie tugged the reluctant apprentice out into Merlin’s study.

Hisirdoux approached the mirror, looking back at Archie before he confronted the letters snaking down his collarbone. He twisted this way and that, heart falling to pieces over and over with every word.

He shifted his hood back into place, fluffing the collar to cast the letters in shadow. One look at Archie’s concerned face was all it took. He sank against the wall, gathering Archie into his arms and burying his face into his familiar’s side. Glistening tears wet Archie’s fur as the cat dragon purred loudly to offer comfort. 

Hisirdoux’s breathing evened out. “Arch, what have I done? What can I do?” he whispered, clutching the familiar ever closer.

Archie placed a large paw on the boy’s chest, near his heart. “You can go after them. Tell them what you know.” 

Douxie nodded after a beat and gathered himself, quickly walking out of Merlin’s tower and towards the western wing of the castle.

༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓

The king and his court mages piled into a carriage in preparation for the trip to the port where they’d depart to Spain for the royal summit. Merlin and Morgana sat next to each other and shared a look when the carriage lurched forward. Of course Merlin enlisted Morgana’s help, she’s a trusted source of chaos. He felt for the Crowlord’s aura in the tower and nodded to her once he confirmed Corbin was away. While Arthur was distracted, they sent their magic out. Tendrils of light bobbed, weaved, and merged to form two fluorescent lime balls. They floated around as if to get their bearings, then flew at the west tower. Nestled just below the ridge leading from the doorway was a sack of Dworkstone, its contents belonging to various trolls imprisoned in the castle dungeons. One ball started to vibrate just before it pushed to the center of the sack, starting the movement needed for a mother of an explosion The other flattened into a shield, curling itself around the sack. And they waited.

༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓

You were still curled on the floor, Corinth in your lap when the crows began to beat their wings against their cages. Corinth was panicked but managed to push what coherent thought she could into your mind.

“The door… danger... hurry…” She struggled, taking off out the window in a flutter of black. 

You felt the disturbance, dread rising in the pit of your stomach. Scrambling to your feet, you barely managed to stand before a loud boom shook the tower. The shield swelled, Trollfire stretching the ward into the room. Your frantic hands undid locks and bonds as quickly as they could, ushering the crows to safety through the large window. The ward began to thin, crackles of green sparks coming undone as the fire fought against Merlin’s magic. You barely managed to throw the last crow out the window before the ward burst into a violent, moving wall of green flames.

You were pushed into the far wall, falling and splitting your brow on the cobblestone. All you could hear was ringing as your vision went white, slowly fading back to normal. You were trapped under the desk and a few chairs, too weak to lift them off. The screech of a hawk sounded far off as your hearing faded in and out. Fire blazed all around you, easily spreading along the hay bedding in the open cages. You coughed, smoke already in the air. Wait. It shouldn’t be this low yet, it’s only been a few moments since the explosion. You quickly sobered into a panic when you realized the wood piled on top of you was burning. Great. Now you were scared and disoriented. A perfect mix for getting out of sticky situations. The only thing to do now was wait.

Douxie could swear he felt his soul leave his body. He was on his way to tell you-- well, everything. You were his everything. He felt it before he heard it. The tingle of troll and human magic filled the air before a loud explosion shook the western tower. The western tower? Fuzzbuckets, you were on duty today! Crows flew from the open window, a whole murder blackening the sky for a few moments. They’d dispersed by the time he made it to the tower entrance. There was a small crowd a few paces back, Lancelot and another knight inspecting the swelling ward full of fire. Douxie pushed through the crowd just in time to see Lancelot raising his sword. 

“No! Everyone run!” he screamed. 

Lance was already going full swing when he heard it, looking back at Douxie in fear. Douxie grabbed the knight and made the best ward he could on short notice before the shield burst. They were all blasted backward, a few serfs’ tunics setting on fire. His dark hair was thoroughly windswept, his entire body frozen in shock on the ground. Lancelot might have been screaming, but Douxie couldn’t hear it. Blood dripped down his pale face, but Douxie couldn’t feel it. He could have been floating, his head was so light. Sure, his ears rang, his hands trembled, his chest heaved, but all he could feel was you. Your confusion, your panic. You were definitely inside. Douxie struggled to his feet and stumbled forward into the tower, ignoring Galahad’s voice yelling for him to stop.

If he wasn’t suffocating before, he sure was now. Douxie brought his hood to his mouth to filter some of the air and began searching for you. It wasn’t a very big room, but between the fire, smoke, and items strewn throughout, it was proving more difficult than he’d hoped. 

You let out a groan, the table pushing splinters into your leg.

He whipped his head towards the source of the sound, hoping to catch a glimpse of movement. “Y/N?! Y/N, where are you?” he cried.

Weakly, you spoke through a great cough. “...Douxie? Is that you?” 

He hurried to the large pile of wood and began tearing it apart. “It’s me, it’s me, love. Please be alright, please, please, please, you can’t die. You’re not going to die, love.”

Hisirdoux heaved the table off you just as you slumped to the floor. He lifted you by the arms with a mighty roar, dragging you towards the open doorway. Galahad and the knight from earlier ran to catch you both as Douxie slipped into unconsciousness. 

༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓

Two days. You hadn’t stirred for two days. The sun shone softly through the long linen curtains. Your familiar was perched on the headboard, asleep. Douxie was sat up by your bedside, bandaged hands gingerly holding one of yours while Archie slept on your legs. The boy had gotten burned pulling the debris off of you. He hadn’t left your side, save when the castle nurses forced him to eat, bathe, and sleep. They knew him well, uncoordinated as he was, and it broke their hearts to see him look so tired although the past couple of days were the most rested he’d ever been. He was scared. Everything had gone downhill when he found out you were soulmates and he blamed himself. 

“None of this would have happened if I’d just told you. You could have been away from the tower, safe with me. I was too afraid of losing you. All I knew was you loved someone else and I couldn’t let you guilt yourself into abandoning ‘him’ because we’re bonded. I was on my way to tell you, you know. I saw what you were thinking to Corinth and Archie convinced me to go after you. I-” his voice cracked, fresh tears coming to his eyes. “I love you, Y/N. I have long before I knew about the bond. I hurt you. I hurt us both. If only I wasn’t such a coward…” He was weeping now, head hung low and shoulders shaking. “I love you so much, and I still let this happen,” he stammered between quiet sobs. He brought your hand to his forehead, cradling it as if it was the most precious thing in the world. And to him, you were.

He jumped when your hand slowly withdrew from his. His head snapped up, and there you were. Sun shining behind you like a halo, your eyes glinting in a tearful smile. You wiped the tears from his cheek, just like he’d done to you with the unruly slorr all those months ago, and let out a yelp of surprise. Douxie had thrown his arms around you and buried his face into your shoulder.

“Doux! Your hair tickles,” you croaked, bringing your arms around him. He was crying again, just a little. His chest felt light. You were here. You were okay. Archie had woken when you jumped and was padding up to your face, pushing himself against your cheek. You sat up slowly when Douxie released you and patted the space next to you on the cot. He settled and looked up at you, eyes still sad.

“So, uh. How much of that did you hear?”

“Enough.” You cupped his face. “Douxie. I didn’t fall in love with a coward. I fell in love with the bravest, most selfless wizard in Camelot. Not to mention his adorable manbun. I love you too, Hisirdoux Casperan. Soul bond or not, I want to spend the rest of eternity with you.”

He brought his hand to yours, feeling the tiny curl trap blossom on the ring he made you. Gently, he took their hand in his, admiring the accessory. “Even after all I did, you kept it on.”

“And I don’t plan on ever taking it off,” you smiled. 

He slowly removed the ring, taking hold of your left hand. His eyes were hopeful and a little scared when he looked up at you, fingers pausing. Tears welled up in your eyes.

“Promise?”

“With my whole heart, love.”

You placed your hand on the back of his neck, pulling him into a soft, loving kiss as he slipped the promise ring onto your finger.

༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓・༓

Lance had lost his arm in the explosion but was rather excited about his new prosthetic. You two had healed as well, soon going back to work. Every time you passed one another, fingers brushed, kisses were stolen, and smiles were shared. The entire castle ended up hearing about how you two became so close, and soon enough, you were somewhat of a folk tale amongst the townsfolk. Now, every Christmas, soulmates exchange handmade gifts while sharing sweetbuns, now deemed a good omen for true love.

Even now, 900 years later, you’d hide your smiles as Arcadian couples surprised one another with things they’d made while ordering an eclair at Benoit’s. It’d been so long, but it seems some things stay the same, you and Hisirdoux included. Sure, you’d both grown in character, but around you, he was still the same lovesick fool he had been all those years ago. You still had your ring, which he’d embellished a bit on your wedding day. Douxie still thought about you as much as he did then. Today, while you were at your job at HexTech, you smiled adoringly at the words on your wrist.

“Your eyes are such a lovely color. Oh, how far we’ve come from clumsy accidents and runny ink. I love you, darling. More than you can ever know.”

[cinna-wanroll]

Obi and Ahsoka being an iconic duo for however long it takes you to read this

Long hyperspace journeys could stretch on for days, with nothing but the white noise and the whir of the ship’s engines to keep the occupants any company.

But eventually, there reached a point where the giddy anticipation was lost into a stagnant period of waiting. 

And so there sat Obi-Wan Kenobi four days into hyperspace, waiting. 

He was usually a very patient man, years of training a young, rambunctious Anakin Skywalker had required that much of him. And he was still patient. Yet something inside him was stirring, the nagging doubts not leaving him alone. So while The Negotiator tore through warped space, his window of time to figure things out was closing. 

And here it was, his great doubt; how much longer he would be able to save those he was assigned to protect. His ship was hurdling at a speed faster than even light could travel towards a world in turmoil, and he- a mere man- was expected to fix it. The hopes, dreams, and futures dreams of an entire civilization depended on him.

He shivered and wondered how the lives of innocent people could constantly pour across his hands and slip away if he wasn’t careful. The knowledge that he was responsible for them was sometimes too much of a weight to bear alone- another reason why he valued his battalion so much. Their support was always constant, their determination and reassurances making him stronger. 

But that still left the question; why was he responsible? His chest tightened as he knew he shouldn’t be, but it wasn’t his place to decide, and he would never leave any being to suffer. 

A deep breath calmed his mind as he sat upon his bunk with crossed legs, letting the cool airflow help guide him into a deep state of meditation. He rested his palms against his knees, instantly falling into the stance he’d practiced since he was a boy. 

In place of his worry and fear came a tide of clarity that the Force provided- a place where all things had an equal purpose. He smiled softly and sank into that familiar peace, deepening his connection to the Force with every moment.

About five minutes into his practice, the door to his room zipped open without warning, quick footsteps following after. He didn’t get up, but he did open his eyes slowly, consciousness slowly returning to the Jedi master. 

He’d expected to see Anakin, perhaps even Cody on a busy day where he forgot to knock, but not Ahsoka. He blinked in surprise as she entered his quarters with a friendly smile. 

“Hey master,” she greeted, joining him in his bunk. 

He raised an eyebrow, “Padawan Tano,” he nodded as she sat down, “I don’t suppose you’ve forgotten how to knock?” 

She blushed slightly, dipping her head in embarrassment, “Apologies master, I didn’t mean any disrespect. It’s just Master Skywalker-”

Obi-Wan’s mouth twitched into a slight grin as he finished, “Hardly ever follows any basic courtesies, I know.” 

She returned his smile shyly, nodding.

“So, what can I do for you, padawan?” He turned to give her his full attention, uncrossing his legs and putting himself into a more relaxed position. 

She sighed, laying back on the low bed, “Master Skywalker’s been having me review these stupid holos for hours now-” she brought her hands to the side of her head in exasperation, “and if I see one more blasted star chart I think I might just defect to the CIS.”

Obi-Wan chuckled, “I can’t say I blame you- Master Qui-Gon used to make me study every map of every planet of every system until it felt like I knew the layout of the entire galaxy.”

Ahsoka giggled, sitting up and resting her head on her knees, expecting him to continue the story. 

“What’s more- I used to have to write every single report on every mission because the council wouldn’t stop complaining about Qui-Gon’s versions.”

Her eyes widened in disbelief, “What? Why?”

He tipped his head slightly, giving her a conspiratorial look, “Something about them being too full of,” he adjusted his tone until it was just slightly more regal sounding, “personal ideals and passionate phrases not appropriate to include in professional documents.”

‘Well,” she shrugged, “that does sound like the council.” 

He ignored the slight offense and continued, “Yes, but I gave them all a run for their money. My reports were all no shorter than fifty pages each, detailing every breeze that blew while we traveled,” a mischievous spark lit his eyes as he finished.

“Ah, so that's why it takes you forever during mission debriefs,” Ahsoka grinned, “you developed some bad habits.”

“Hey,” he chided while she laughed, “at least I don’t exaggerate, hmm?”

“What's the fun of an adventure without stories to tell, Master?” She countered, crossing her arms in mock-defense. 

“Certainly stories are plenty exciting without all the extra flare you add?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Eh, I like to give them my personal touch.”

They both smiled, Ahsoka laying back down and Obi-Wan resting his back against his bedpost. 

They fell into a comfortable silence before Obi-Wan confessed, “I’ve been quite bored as well, trapped in here without anyone to talk to. Everyone’s just so-” he searched for the right word.

“Preoccupied? Distant? Distracted? Absent?” Ahsoka filled in for him.

He nodded, surprised, “Precisely. I suppose I shouldn’t be complaining about everyone finally doing what they’re supposed to. But it makes me wonder- should I be taking this more seriously? Do I have a right to stay in my room, waiting aimlessly to arrive? Or should I be doing something?” 

She paused before responding, “Well, what can you do?”

He opened his mouth as if he already knew the exact answer to that question before he realized that he didn’t at all. 

“I- I’m not quite sure.”

She nodded and sat up, resting a hand on his shoulder. 

“I think sometimes in war, you have to accept the fact that there isn’t anything you can do at the moment. You can worry and stress, but in the end, it only serves to hurt yourself and those around you than save anyone else.” 

He looked over at her, studying Anakin’s young apprentice as though he hadn’t seen her in a while. It made him feel- weird, to see how much she was growing. But a thread of warmth came with it, a sense of pride he hadn’t expected.

“That’s a very wise observation, Ahsoka,” he said finally, nodding to her.

His praise made her perk up a bit and smile, as eager to please as ever, “thank you, Master Kenobi.”

He nodded and returned her look, deciding he wanted to get away from his shadowed room for a bit, “Do you feel like playing a friendly game of sabacc, padawan? I’m sure we've got a deck of cards around here somewhere.” 

She got to her feet swiftly, stretching as he followed suit, “Sure! Although, Master- I don’t think there’s such a thing as a,” she held up her hands in air quotes, “friendly game of sabacc. People always have ulterior motives.”

He chuckled as they walked towards the entryway into the corridors beyond his room, “A common-found truth, yes,” he began as they stepped out of the room, “your master has taught you well.” 

She shrugged, “There are also some things that have to be learned on one’s own.”

“Oh?”  He asked, “And how would you have learned such a thing?”

She grinned and shrugged, “But Master, I thought you said my stories had too much flare.”

“Oh no, now I’m far too intrigued to care. Please elaborate.”

“Maybe I’ll tell you- but only if you beat me.”

He grinned, “You’re on, padawan.” 

When they entered the main quarters, they were greeted with an almost eerie silence and empty space, all furniture and objects long since neglected.  

“Wow,” Ahsoka mused, “I never thought this room could be so- quiet.”

“Me neither,” Obi-Wan agreed, looking around for a drawer or any sign of a compartment for a deck of cards. 

“I know we have a deck,” she added as Kenobi walked over to the small shelf of datapads they kept from previous missions, “I just saw Crys, Wooley, and Kano playing last night.”

“Hmm,” he said, fingers tracing along the backs of each pad carefully, checking to see if anyone had decided to place the deck in between some of the holos like they usually did.

“They might’ve put them in one of the holo chess compartments,” she suggested after he stood back and shook his head.

He sighed, knowing she was probably right, “But I’ve asked them not to put the deck back in there at least five times now.”

Ahsoka shrugged, unbothered, “Maybe they forgot.”

He looked back at her disbelievingly, “Five times?”

She threw her hands up, “I don’t know. Have you met Wooley? I don’t think he ever fully recovered from that concussion.”

He laughed and pressed the holo chess compartment gently, frowning as sure enough, the deck of cards appeared. 

“It appears you’re right,” Obi-Wan said, sitting down on one end of the table and unboxing the cards, “sixth time’s the charm.”

She took her place at the opposite end, grinning, “I’m sure they’ll get it this time.”

“Do you know how to shuffle?” He asked, looking up at her.

“Do we have to?” She asked, surprised.

“Yes. It appears they were playing Mahaa’i Shuur- all of the mistresses are next to each other, I haven't looked at the rest of the deck yet.”

“Okay,” she said, reaching her hand out for the deck.

He sat back while she focused on shuffling, watching the cards shift around almost hypnotically. 

“Master, you don’t know how to shuffle?”

The question caught him off guard, and he was forced to admit he’d never really thought about it before. 

“I suppose not- everyone usually did the shuffling for me,” he ticked each person off on his fingers, “Master Yoda, Qui-Gon, Master Tahl, Bant, Quinlan, Satine, Anakin, the Clones-”

“Hold on,” Ahsoka interrupted, suddenly looking very amused, “you’re telling me you’ve played cards with Master Yoda?”

He nodded while she dealt out two cards for each of them, and the game began. 

“Yes, many times. He always used to come to visit me in the crèche quite often, and we’d play cards or watch a holo while the other younglings went out to wrestle or play senators.”

He drew a commander card. 

“You two always seemed close,” Ahsoka commented as she took her turn and drew, a slight frown forming on her face, “do you have any idea why?”

“Why what?” He asked distractedly as he drew the queen of the darkness.

“Why he would come to visit you.”

Obi-Wan tipped his head, trying to think, “Actually, now that you mention it, no. He used to come to visit me when I was a small infant, I still have memories of him from the age of three.”

Ahsoka wrinkled her nose and teased, “does that mean Master Yoda used to change your diapers?”

Obi-Wan returned her disgusted expression, “I don’t know, and I have no intention of finding out.”

She laughed, moving part of her hand to one side. 

She organizes her cards by value, he realized, narrowing his gaze. 

The door to the room opened, letting in two familiar faces as they both continued to draw. 

“And that’s why I was-” Anakin stopped mid-sentence as he saw Obi-Wan and Ahsoka, concentrating on their game. Out of the corner of his eye, Obi-Wan saw Rex salute. 

“General. Commander.”

“Hi,” Ahsoka looked up at him briefly, “we were just talking about how Master Yoda used to change Obi-Wan’s diapers when he was a youngling.”

Obi-Wan’s face reddened, and he stared at his cards, not brave enough to look up. 

“We were not.”

Ahsoka shrugged, moving another card to the left of her hand, “I don’t know, sounded that way to me.”

Anakin crossed his arms at Ahsoka, “Yeah, well it sounded to me like I told you to study those holos earlier.”

“I did,” she protested, “but you gave me so many that my head started to swim!” 

“Those holos are important,” Anakin persisted, “and that doesn’t excuse why you’re out here playing cards with Obi-Wan instead of doing your meditations.”

Ahsoka sighed, laying down her hand, “Yes, Master.” 

“Come now, Anakin,” Obi-Wan chided without looking up from his hand, fourteen away from winning, “surely after all those times you used to whine at me about even basic form, you can allow your padawan a break.”

Ahsoka looked up at her master hopefully, who had turned his glower on his old master. 

“Fine,” he determined finally, “but as soon as you’re done, you go straight back to those holos, understand?”

Ahsoka smiled gratefully, “Yes, Master.”

Anakin walked up behind her chair, gazing at her hand. Obi-Wan looked up to scrutinize over what Anakin’s expression was like, but to his disappointment his former apprentice’s face belied nothing. He frowned, wondering when Anakin learned to become such a formidable card player.

A voice in the back of his mind reminded him that Senator Amidala was an esteemed and practiced Sabacc player, but he quickly banished the inkling, drawing another card. 

The Star, blast. 

Rex did the same as Anakin, coming up and watching over Obi-Wan’s shoulder. 

After a few more rounds, Obi-Wan had almost forgotten he was there. So when he drew a card that let him win within -17 points, the Jedi almost jumped when Rex said, “I’ll bet one of my pistols Kenobi wins.”

He repressed an eye roll, only shaking his head and drawing the idiot, zero points. 

“Which one?” Asked Anakin, looking up at Rex. 

“Eh, the good one.”

“Hmm- how about, whoever loses the bet gets shiny training duty for a month, and your pistol?”

“Deal.”

Obi-Wan held up the idiot card as though he were comparing it to Anakin, and Rex chuckled softly.

“What?”

“Nothing sir.”

The game continued, with Obi-Wan just -2 points away from winning when Ahsoka slammed her cards down enthusiastically, calling “Idiot's Array!” 

Obi-Wan looked over her cards and smiled, setting his hand down, “Well done.”

“Thanks,” she said, high-fiving her master. 

“Gah,” Rex exclaimed, clapping Obi-Wan on the shoulder, “you let me down, general!”

Obi-Wan put up his hands defensively, “Hey, I’m not the one who told you to bet, Captain.” 

Anakin walked up to them, grinning like a fool, “Yeah, but now someone has to train all the new shinies for a whole month! Ha, that’s for making me walk around the temple in my bathing suit last weekend.”

Obi-Wan’s eyebrows shot up, “Wh-”

He was cut off by the beeping of his comm. He gave Anakin a death glare before opening the transmission with a tap, mouthing the words this conversation is not over.

“Yes, Commander?”

“We’ve arrived, sir.”

“Very good Cody. We’ll be right down.”

He cut the transmission and started towards the door, the others following closely behind to the bridge.

Ahsoka did a merry little skip, coming up to walk beside Obi-Wan and Anakin, smirking. 

“Looks like I won’t have to do those map studies after all,” she boasted.

Obi-Wan resisted the urge to groan- you shouldn’t have said anything, Ahsoka. 

His old apprentice smirked right back at the young Togruta, “Don’t worry padawan, I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time on the surface for you to do some analyzing.”

She groaned and turned towards the hallway that led to her room, “I’m going to pick up my shoto.”

“Okay,” Obi-Wan said, cutting off Anakin before he could start to argue, “but be prompt- I expect we’ll be departing within the next ten minutes.”

She met his gaze and nodded happily, before running off to grab her lightsaber.

“Now,” Obi-Wan began, rounding on Anakin, “what is this I hear of you strutting around in your bathing suit around temple grounds last weekend?” 

[daffodildazaiwrites]

can i pls request poly hcs for chuuya/reader/dazai bc i love them very much and also i just wanna date them both. perhaps just like “how they met” + cute relationship hcs if that’s ok!! nsfw is optional! Thank u so much ^^

THIS IS SUCH A GREAT REQUEST! Thank you so much anon! Also since I felt like it would be easier to establish a relationship like that I took the liberty of making the reader a part of the Port Mafia. It just seemed easier then to write reader as a part of the agency,  I hope you enjoy, this was super fun to write!!!! Also I love writing poly relationships so feel free to requests more!

also ofc im writing nsfw it’s a shame that you even considered that i might not lol

Warning: Explicit sinful content at the end

Commissions | Ko-Fi

Your relationship with Chuuya was already well established on the day you met Dazai. Your relationship with Chuuya was of being flirty friends that always came to the edge of being something more. You weren’t going to lie, after working with the red head for so long you had developed a minor crush. 

Meeting Dazai for the first time was one of the most confusing instances that happened to you. First of all, for someone who was imprisoned by the Port Mafia he had quite the mouth on him and second you’ve never witnessed Chuuya act so irrationally annoyed at someone before. At least someone other than you. 

You’ve heard many stories about Dazai Osamu before, especially from Chuuya. You’ve expected the man to, at least, look more threatening. But after the interrogation began you noticed where his true weapon layed, his mind. That same weapon was the reason why you were so mesmerized by him. You could never admit this to Chuuya though. Dazai was the enemy and from the seeming of it, Chuuya absolutely despised him. 

Dazai, noticing your lingering stares and open body language, was quick to engage in conversation. He was much more flirtatious then you anticipated and to be honest, it kind of worked. Blood rushed to your cheeks as you looked the other way. Dazai wasn’t the only one to notice your reaction. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” 

“What?”

Meanwhile Chuuya was the embodiment of mixed emotions. Seeing Dazai after so long made him want to kick his face in to the wall and hug him. He was highly confused about the latter. But his rage grew when Dazai shamelessly flirted with you and that it worked????? he was appalled.

He never acted on it but he kind of figured you had a crush on him but apparently you also are head over heels about Dazai? He took in a deep breath. He might’ve over exaggerate the second part a bit. 

After the encounter, Dazai visited both you and Chuuya frequently and as time passed it was harder and harder to consider Dazai as the enemy. Even Chuuya didn’t seem surprised anymore that the man just showed up in your shared apartment. After a certain hour the two of you grew accustomed to hear a knock at the window. 

The only issue was that Dazai and Chuuya fought all the time. It was tiring for you. Especially when their competitiveness over you grew, you felt like a toy that was trying to be shared among two toddlers. 

The first sudden realization that you might have feelings for the two men you have grown accustomed to is when Chuuya blatantly told you that he wouldn’t mind if you wanted to be with Dazai and that he would understand. You couldn’t be with either of them because you had fallen for them both. 

Chuuya is relieved when you don’t choose. Even if he wanted you happiness he couldn't bare the idea  of losing two people he cared about. He could still argue that he hated Dazai with a fiery passion but he would be fooling no one. 

Dazai is the first one to suggest a poly relationship as the three of you were lounging on the couch. Your head resting on Dazai’s lap as your legs rested on Chuuya’s. With confusion both you and Chuuya stared at him. You’ve heard the term before but you had no idea how it would work. 

When Dazai explained the fundamentals of a poly relationship, you’re relieved. There was nothing wrong with you. You weren’t selfish or insatiable. Dazai’s proposition felt like a blessing and eased your troubled heart. 

Chuuya on the underhand, still felt confused. He felt that trouble and heartbreak was inevitable in such a relationship. Especially because he had convinced himself Dazai was only suggestion such a thing for your sake. It wasn’t hard to see how you felt about the both of them so to him, it seemed like Dazai was just trying to spare your feelings. When your sparkling eyes landed on Chuuya, he felt as if he had to say yes, for your sake at least. 

Dazai eased Chuuya’s mind when he admitted that he cared for the both of you and that he simply didn’t want to choose. He also added that they practically lived together anyway. This was enough to convince Chuuya but due to Dazai being a part of the Armed Detective Agency they had to keep it a secret. Dazai had no problem with this but both you and Chuuya weren’t really known to be good at being secretive. You were just too impulsive. Besides what if they had to attack the agency, what then? 

But then again, none of you wanted to back down, therefore your relationship began. 

General Relationship:

 Dazai is a brat. He wants everything to go according to his plans. The fact that he’s very good at reading the both of you makes it easy for him to get his way. He doesn’t mind playing minor tricks or manipulation tactics to get you and Chuuya to do stuff you don’t originally want to do. It’s exhausting to constantly trying to understand if Dazai was genuine or just wanted you to do something. Chuuya suggested that he should just kick him in the face as a punishment but you preferred to actually communicate. The two of you sit Dazai down and tell him how awful you and Chuuya had been feeling. He’s shocked at first because he had no idea the issue had gotten that big, but he’s quick to apologize. 

You and Chuuya mostly do the cooking. In fact you’re not going to even take credit, Chuuya is the actual one who cooks. You’re usually there more as an assistant. Since Dazai, for the sake of keeping the relationship off grid, comes home late the meals are usually prepared and waiting for him. Also Dazai tried to cook once, the kitchen caught on fire so Chuuya forbade him to cook ever again. 

Dazai tends to tease the both of you a lot. Whenever the mafia and agency clashes in some way, he says the most inappropriate things and it flusters both of you. In fact, you saw the whole agency looking at Dazai with utter confusion and discomfort whenever he opened his mouth near the two of you. Chuuya ended up strangling Dazai when he got home and honestly, you let it go on more than necessary. 

Unfortunately, since the relationship is secret you can’t really go on outside dates. The three of you stay indoors and your dates would usually consists of binging movies or reading books. The three of you decided to go out on full moons only. Chuuya would prepare a basket filled with you and Dazai’s favorites and would go on a moonlit picnic. 

Chuuya is the jealous one. He hates when anyone so much as glances at you or Dazai. Of course, Dazai loves to play it up a bit especially if he KNOWS Chuuya can’t say anything or else he’ll be in trouble. In the end both you and Dazai shower the redhead with extra affection when the three of you are at home or else he’ll be super cranky for a week. 

Dazai and Chuuya are both very open with their affection. They love to shower you with kisses and hugs. Chuuya especially. Since you and Chuuya work together it’s more easy for him to hold you hand or hug you from behind in the day time. Even if he would never admit it Dazai does get jealous because you two get to spend more time together while in the meanwhile he has to jump through hoops to see the two of you. 

Chuuya smokes when he’s stressed and basically WW3 begins in the house. The two of you hate the smell and want him to stop. 

“It’s just one smoke. It’s not like I smoke all the time.” 

“SMOKING KILLS!”

“OH MY GOD IT’S JUST ONE SMOKE, I’M STRESSED!”

“DON’T TRY THAT CRAP ON ME WE WORK AT THE SAME PLACE!” 

“Look you ALWAYS leave an empty carton of milk in the fridge and don’t get me started on Dazai!”

“What do I do?!” 

“IT’S LIKE YOU DON’T EVEN TRY TO AIM WHEN YOU GO TO THE TOILET!”

When the three of you drink, usually wine, you and Dazai’s favorite thing is to get Chuuya drunk. He gets super clingy and affectionate and downright adorable when he’s drunk. Even with Dazai, Chuuya doesn’t hesitate to sit on his lap and give him a sloppy kiss and mumble how much he likes him. Then he starts to cry because he just loves the two of you so much and in the end he ALWAYS falls asleep on either yours or Dazai’s lap. 

The fact that Chuuya and Dazai are absolute troublemakers you worry constantly. Even if you can keep an eye on Chuuya and make him not fight literally everyone that he sees, there’s really no telling what Dazai is up to. It gets to such a point that you end up crying in secret because the constant fear of losing either of them is just too much for you. When the two men learn of this they console you and decide to come up with a system where Dazai notifies them in every three hours by any means necessary. If he can, he also tries to texts more often.   

While you and Chuuya love to cuddle, Dazai isn’t that much of a fan. Despite that he would entertain the two of you by wrapping his long arms and legs around both of you when you go to bed. You would usually be in the middle whilst Chuuya would be the little spoon. On days where Dazai came back especially late, he would find the two of you huddled up together. His heart would melt at the sight and after giving you and Chuuya a peck on the forehead, he would settle in, pulling you both closer to his body.

NSFW:

Chuuya is the most nervous one among the three of you. Considering his former relationship with Dazai it’s hard for him to let himself be so vulnerable in front of the other. Much to Chuuya’s surprise, Dazai is patient with him and doesn’t do anything that might make him uncomfortable, he does love to tease Chuuya though. At this point teasing his loved ones is pretty much Dazai’s drug. As time passes Chuuya starts to trusts Dazai with his body and needs. 

Dazai just screams dominant energy to you and you’re not mistaken. He would make you beg for his cock and tease you until you started to hump the nearest pillow with saliva dribbling down your mouth. He would want a show to say the least. He would tie Chuuya to a chair with his cock out and ready, then he would fuck you right in front of him, teasing Chuuya as he had his way with you. Asking Chuuya if the view was good, if he liked what he was doing to you, if he wanted to join them. He was also a fan of trying new things and toys as long as the two of you were okay with it. 

Chuuya on the other hand was gentle as gentle could be. He would litter your flushed skin with soft kisses and make you feel like a true goddess. He would like to tease you in his own way. Chuuya would have his way with you in a slow and steady pace, sucking, licking and kissing every inch of your body. In the end you would writhe underneath him, begging him to put his cock in you and just fuck you already.  

Seeing the two men for the first time together makes your cunt drip with want immediately. Dazai is quite tender with Chuuya and the way he slowly works him open with his long fingers and then fucks him is a huge turn on for you. The sight of Chuuya being filled with Dazai’s cock to the brim and the sweet noises of his moaning made you lose control. Your body would move on its own as you nestled yourself between Chuuya’s legs and sucked his hard cock. 

When Dazai and Chuuya get together you are pretty much guaranteed to see stars. You love being filled up by both ends and feeling the two men you absolutely adore inside of you. Dazai would fuck you as you sucked on Chuuya’s cock. Both men groaning and moaning as they had their way with you. Being the one who has no self control Chuuya would wrap your hair around his fingers and started to blatantly fuck your mouth. You would the tip of his cock deep in your throat as you swallowed around him. Not liking to be ignored Dazai would snap his hips faster and harder, making you moan around Chuuya’s length. Your inner walls would clench around Dazai’s cock as you came. The two men would follow suit, both of them filling you up with their delicious cum to the brim. 

[ohpretty-baby]

hesitation

⇥ pairing: jungkook x reader ; established relationship

⇥ genre: angst, fluff, jungkook’s kind of a lost puppy in this one lmao

⇥ synopsis: “can i kiss you?” ; you storm out of the house in the middle of an argument and jungkook doesn’t know what to do when you finally come back to him.

⇥ warnings: cursing

⇥ word count: 3.2k

a/n: for the anon who asked for an angsty fluff with kook! thanks so much for requesting <3 hope you enjoy! (if you don’t enjoy, feel free to request again!)

i’m slowly but surely getting through my requests :) thank you for being patient. things have been kind of stressful as exams for me are coming up soon.

hope everyone is being safe! i love you <3

It’s 4 AM, and Jungkook can’t be bothered to even try to get some rest. His eyes are bloodshot, vision blurry due to his swollen eyelids. The cold night air from the open window hits his bare skin, making him shiver. Jungkook covers himself in the covers, gaze stuck on your side of the bed.

It’s empty, the wrinkles on the mattress insufficient to make Jungkook satisfied. Instead he’s restless, tears staining his cheeks and pooling onto his pillow without him even knowing. He sniffles, the sound reverberating around the room, proving how quiet it had been without you. Jungkook’s lip quivers before he’s breaking down again, body trembling.

He wishes nothing more than for you to return. For you to come back into his arms and never leave.

It had been two weeks since your argument, when you and Jungkook had been yelling to each other so much to the point that you grabbed your bags and left. He couldn’t even remember what the two of you were fighting about. With plates and glasses shattered all around that day, Jungkook found himself sitting on the tile floor, crawled up in a ball and dazed as he couldn’t exactly process what happened. There were no texts, no calls, nothing at all from you. It was almost as if you had just disappeared from his life.

Jungkook knows that he deserved it. He’s absolutely heartbroken at the fact that he had been so uncooperative and stubborn that he made you feel like you couldn’t even talk to him. He knows that this is all his fault, that if he had just listened to your concerns and talked it through with you, none of this would have happened. He knows that if he had been understanding and patient, you would be lying next to him tonight, your soft body pressed up against him. He would be able to hear your soft breaths as you slept, would be able to see how peaceful you were next to him.

In the deafening silence of the room, Jungkook yearns to apologize to you. He imagines what it would be like to have you in his arms again, to drown in your sweet scent and feel your lips on his once more. The ache in his body has slowly dulled each passing day but was still a constant reminder of his need for your presence. Jungkook finds himself always reaching out for something, but never getting anything in return. He grasps at air and empty space unintentionally, the new action becoming a habit.

He knows that it’s you he’s looking for, but you’re nowhere to be seen.

Jungkook’s deep in a trance and he figures that if he thinks about it hard enough, he can at least pretend to feel your presence around him. He imagines you giving him soothing, butterfly kisses, the thought of your lips on his skin making him feel light with joy yet heavy with heartbreak at the same time. As much as he’d like to cry, his eyes feel strained and the image of you soothing him enough to make him sleepy.

That’s when he hears the faintest sound of a door creak open.

The first thought that registers in his tired, slow brain is that someone broke in and they were going to steal something from him.

So Jungkook ever so quietly grabs his cell phone in and is about to call the police when he shakes his head instead and shoves it in his pocket. It was so late at night, his sleep-deprived brain tells him that if he called the police and the burglar was right downstairs, it would be useless. He reasons that by the time the police come, he would either be dead or the thief would have already gotten away.

In conclusion, self defense is the best option at 4 AM.

The male slowly stands up from the bed, taking a few stretches before going into action. He examines the bedroom hastily in an attempt to find a weapon. However, his attempts are futile until his vision lands on a hardcover book resting on your nightstand. Jungkook grabs it, knocking lightly to see how solid the book was. He nods in satisfaction, clutching it tightly in his hands.

He’s not quite sure how he can use the book, but he hopes that from its wooden cover and hefty weight, it could possibly be enough to knock someone out.

Tiptoeing out of the bedroom, Jungkook stealthily makes his way down to the living room, where he presumes the thief is. He makes sure to take the lightest steps, as he knows how loud the stairs could be, even with just the tiniest bit of pressure.

In fact, you had a terrible habit of always waking Jungkook up whenever you went downstairs to make yourself a cup of tea in the middle of the night. It made him laugh when you would try to be as quiet as possible but both him and you knew that you would just end up making the stairs creak and groan under your slippers.

After all, you had never really been that much of a light walker.

Pain shoots through his chest as he remembers the sound of you walking downstairs. He shakes it off, lightly slapping himself and feeling stupid for being sad over something as simple as a staircase. Returning his attention to the grave situation at hand, Jungkook reaches the bottom of the stairs, quickly moving to hide behind a thick plant. He’s aware that the criminal can probably see him, but he determines that he’d knock the person out before anyone could spot his hiding place.

Brown eyes scanning the living room, Jungkook sees that no one else was there except for him. Jungkook frowns, the furrow in his brows delving deeper and deeper in his skin.

Then, he hears a soft click from the stove and a sharp, high-pitched sound of water hissing from the kitchen. His ears perk up, more alert now than ever.

He thinks it’s weird for someone to break in just to boil water, but nevertheless, he treads on. He crouches low as he walks, raising the book above his head in order to hit the culprit from behind. His steps are slow, soundless, his heart beating rapidly as adrenaline pulses violently through his veins. He can hear his heart drumming in his ears, blocking out any noise in the house.

But Jungkook keeps his calm, clenching his jaw in anticipation. as he gets ready to attack.

He makes a mental note to praise himself for being so cool at moment like this. Those action movies you loved so much had taught him well. Time slows down for a bit as Jungkook gets distracted by the thought of you. He wonders what you would think of him if you were here, what you’d say when he finally catches the culprit. He thinks you’d probably tease him for using your book as a weapon and you’d scold him for not calling the police right away.

You’d probably say something on the lines of:

“Oh my goodness, Kook, are you stupid?”

He wishes you could be here to say that. His eyelids shut as he hears your voice in his ears.

Realizing once again that his head is in the clouds, Jungkook takes a few moments to steady himself and his thoughts. He inhales deeply, trying to be as levelheaded as possible before carrying out his somewhat improvised plan of a sneak attack.

When he finally enters the kitchen, Jungkook expects himself to rush up behind the intruder and knock him out cold. Maybe throw a few punches here and there if he really wanted to feel like a total badass.

Instead, he feels the book slip from out of his hands and he hears it thud loudly on the ground. The sound doesn’t seem to register with him.

“Ah!”

Jungkook hears you yelp, your body jolting up in response to the sound.

His mouth is agape, jaw fixed and permanently locked in that position as he feels like his eyes are about to fall out of his skull. His throat feels as dry as a desert and his heart beats rapidly against his chest, another greater adrenaline rush quickly coming. His body is stuck frozen in his place, not acknowledging the book that had just fallen on the ground.

He cannot believe the sight before him. He cannot believe the fact that you’re standing in front of the stove, arms crossed as you wait for your water to reach your favorite temperature.

For some reason, he could not fathom the idea of you coming back to him and being this close to him.

While your presence is all he can think about, right now, at this moment, you feel foreign to him. It was almost as if you were a hologram, an illusion that he could see but couldn’t actually touch.

“Jungkook?” Although quiet, your voice rings loudly in his ears, bringing him back to earth, “Are you okay?”

You watch him nervously, waiting for him to finally make a response.

But Jungkook can’t muster the strength or the courage to say anything. Instead he just continues to stare at you, eyes tracing the familiar pattern of your facial features that he had missed so much. He takes in the soft puff of your cheeks, wanting nothing more than to hold your face in his hands. The soft moonlight shines on you, displaying the puff of your eyes and the small shiny streaks from dried tears on your skin.

The two of you soak in each other’s presence, taking in how rough the other looked.

He notices how drained you look, how the bags under your eyes had sagged significantly deeper and gotten a few shades darker. He guesses that you can see the red blotches scattered all over his face. The kitchen is noiseless, save for the shallow breaths from both of your lips. Jungkook’s hair is tousled and pulled in every direction, resembling a disheveled bird’s nest. You’re clad in some leggings and his hoodie, while Jungkook has a loose t-shirt on and sweatpants, both of your figures unkempt.

It takes a while before one of you speaks.

“I’m making tea,” Your voice is scratchy, hesitant, “You want some?”

Jungkook nods, finally registering that you were truly in front of him. He then realizes that he had dropped your book, and he promptly bends down to pick it up. Your back is turned to him as you turn of the stove, carefully taking the teapot off the stove. While the water cools down, Jungkook is quick on his feet to grab two mugs and two bags of green tea.

“Oh, thank you,” Your words are painted with genuine surprise when you turn around to see what Jungkook had prepared. You watch, with a small smile on your face, the water turn from clear to green as you pour it in. Jungkook’s gaze is still pinpointed on you and he’s speechless.

He’s sure that you feel extremely awkward, maybe even uncomfortable, because he does as well.

But that really doesn’t matter to him at the moment when he gets to stare at you like this again.

Your eyes meet his, and nothing but pure love and admiration looks back at you, Jungkook’s eyes twinkling when your cheeks turn red. He’s leaning against the counter, head resting on his hand as he continues to say silent, gaze shifting to your mouth as he sees you bite your bottom lip out of habit.

“What’s up with the book?” You attempt to crack a joke in order to lighten the thick air, “Never took you for an Aristotle kind of guy.”

“Aris... what?” Jungkook looks at the book resting in front of him on the counter. He glares at the title, lips absently forming in obscure shapes as he attempts to pronounce the words. His bottom lip juts out as he couldn’t even comprehend how the title is said.

“Nicomachaen Ethics,” You step in, chuckling.

Jungkook’s mouth forms an “o” shape, him now focused on the cover of the book. He can’t seem to decipher what the cover is, wondering who the man drawn on the hardwood was.

“Oh, right,” He mumbles, more to himself rather than to you, realizing that he still hadn’t answered your question, “I thought you were a thief and I was gonna knock you out with this.”

His words are slurred and his voice is thick with fatigue. You giggle as you see his eyelids drooping down slightly as he speaks languidly, and you can’t help but inwardly gush, remembering exactly how cute he was when he was sleepy. He still hasn’t taken a sip of the tea, deciding to just let the steam hit his face.

You focus on the mug in your hands, taking a deep sigh once you finally drink the tea. The hot beverage slides down your throat, warming your body. You hum lightly, lips still pressed against the mug. It’s peaceful in the kitchen, and Jungkook can’t help but feel overjoyed for things to feel somewhat normal.

That’s when dread seeps into his brain.

“Are you leaving me?” His voice trembles, “You’re not leaving me... Are you?”

His doe eyes interlock with yours once more, and instead of admiration, there’s nothing but fear present in him. You can see his eyes shine more and more as the seconds pass by, indicating that they’re welling up with tears. Your expression softens, giving him a sad look.

“Of course not, Kook,” You respond, placing the mug on the counter and fidgeting with it in your hands. Jungkook visibly lets out a sigh of relief and some of the tension knotted in his shoulders releases.

The two of you are both reminded of the fight, your expressions darkening slightly.

“Listen,” Your hand travels to your sleeves, picking at pieces of lint while you speak, “That night... I don’t know why I left you, and I’m-“

Your words are cut off when you feel Jungkook grab your hand. They’re coarse against yours, and he massages your skin with his thumb. You look up to see tears streaming down his face.

“Y/N...” He starts, hiccuping as he sobs, “I’m so sorry for everything.”

You open your mouth to speak, but Jungkook beats you to it.

“This was all my fucking fault,” His head hangs low, and he places his lips on your knuckles, planting soft kisses, “I’m so sorry.”

“Jungkook...” You let out a shaky breath, “I forgive you. I’m sorry too.”

He shakes his head profusely.

“No, no, this was all because of me,” He faces you, voice breaking with every word, “I really fucked up, didn’t I? I made you leave.”

“Kook, no,” You forget your cup of tea and make your way on over to him, wrapping your arms around him.

Jungkook shakes against your chest, holding your waist ever so gently. He’s careful as not to squeeze you, acting as if you’re a porcelain doll. The scent of vanilla brings Jungkook back to life, and he buries himself in your embrace.

Your hand runs through his messy hair, combing through the knots in an attempt to sooth him. You rest your chin on his head, and when the familiar scent of pinewood wafts in your nose, you realize that tears had been falling down from your eyes as well. You place a kiss on his head, gasping as the tears fall onto his hair.

He notices this and immediately pulls away from your embrace to wipe the tear from your eyes, completely ignoring the ones on his own face.

“Can I...” He rubs his nose nervously, “Can I hug you?”

You nod in response, laughing at his strange question. It seems as if he didn’t notice that he had been holding you this whole time.

Jungkook stands up to pull you close to his chest, and you ball the fabric of his t-shirt in your fists. Incoherent apologies pour out of his mouth, his low voice vibrating against your body. He subtly rocks you back and forth in his arms, his strong arms making you feel secure and safe. The scent of pine is stronger now, calming down every muscle in your body and making your legs feel like jelly.

“I missed this,” You whisper, earning you a chuckle from Jungkook.

“Doll, you have no idea,” He responds but then there’s uncertainty in his words, “Can I call you that still?”

“Yes, you can.”

Usually you would have teased him by now, but it’s obvious that neither of you had enough energy to throw jabs at each other.

“I love you, so much,” He breathes out, desperate to get the words out.

“I love you too.”

The air around you is freezing, but Jungkook’s arms feel warm and welcoming. As your head is pressed against his chest, you feel his heart beating loudly, the rhythm lulling you into a state of peace. Jungkook feels the same serenity, overjoyed to have you here with him again.

Both of your tears are dried, now replaced with an abundance of love and gratitude shared between you and him.

“Y/N?”

“Yes, Jungkook?”

His cheeks are dusted a slight pink and he gives you a shy smile.

“Can I kiss you?”

Instead of responding, you stand on the tips of your toes and connect your lips with his. Electricity shoots down your spine, and your nerves are on fire. You wrap your arms around his neck, running your hands through his hair as you kiss him passionately. Jungkook quickly responds, kissing you with as much, if not, more, fervor.

His hands travel underneath your hoodie, roaming around and massaging your skin. You sigh into the kiss, feeling the familiar, soothing touch of his hands. Jungkook takes this opportunity to gently prod his tongue in your mouth. You welcome him, mingling your tongue with his. After a few seconds, he smiles into the kiss, making your chest feel light and fluttery.

Jungkook pulls away, buried under your hoodie. Your lips are puffy and tingly as you get lost in Jungkook’s eyes. Your chests raise up and down simultaneously, and he rests his forehead against yours, a bright smile plastered on his face.

He places a gentle kiss on your nose, making you giggle in delight. Some hair falls down on your face, and Jungkook raises a hand to tuck the loose strands behind your ear. His gestures are exuding in love and endearment, showing you already all the words he wants to tell you.

“You’re beautiful,” He says out of nowhere, making your face heat up on the sport. You hide in his chest in response, making him coo at you.

“My pretty little doll,” He clicks his tongue, his praise making you melt. Jungkook grabs your chin, gently asking you to look up at him. You comply, and he whistles as he takes another good look at your face. His smile spreads from ear to ear and you find yourself mirroring him, a smile forming on your face as well.

Jungkook doesn’t waste another chance to feel your lips on his again, leaning in to get rid of the space between the two of you.

“What’d I do to ever deserve you?”

[hellowkatey]

Febuwhump Day 24

Prompt: memory loss

Read on AO3

When Darkness Wins

It takes a moment for Cody's eyes to adjust to the bright lights of the med bay. He blinks a few times, taking a quick assessment of himself before he dares to move. An intense pounding in his head and soreness down his neck, arms, and legs let him know that whatever happened-- for some reason, he can't remember?-- he's probably in rough shape.

The lights above him dim, and he hears footsteps approaching.

"Apologies, commander," someone says. "I told the damned droid to turn the lights down, but you know non-sentients." Cody turns his head to look at the owner of the voice. It's a young woman with kind brown eyes and dark olive skin-- if Cody didn't know better he'd say she were a female clone of Jango, but obviously not. In either case, she's unfamiliar to him, but he supposes they could have gotten some new personnel at their last stop on Coruscant... Though, that leaves the question of where Helix is... "How are you feeling?" she asks, walking over to him and taking out a flashlight.

"Sore," he answers honestly. "My head doesn't feel great, either."

She waves the flashlight across his eyes, her lips curling with mild satisfaction. Now that she's close, he can make out the name printed on her smock-- Ledy.

"Well you did smash it against the side of fighter ship after falling from another fighter ship... so that's to be expected."

Cody's eyebrows knit together in confusion. Now, he feels like he's remember something like that. When he doesn't answer or react, Ledy's face turns serious.

"Commander... can you tell me your name?"

"Cody, ma'am."

She hesitates, pressing her lips together. "I meant your number."

"CC-2224."

"Okay good. And do you remember the accident?"

"No, ma'am."

"Okay... I will be right back."

Ledy strides swiftly from the room, leaving Cody alone in the med bay. He lays back, squeezing his eyes shut as his headache continues to rage. If only she'd administered some painkillers before running off.

Cody is mildly concerned he doesn't remember falling out of a damn ship, but he isn't too worried. He can remember everything else fine. He knows they're patroling Kooriva right now, a relatively low-stress assignment compared to the last few months. General Kenobi has taken it as an opportunity to give the men a much-needed rest-- extending liberty hours and allowing the veteran men to give extra instruction to the shinies they picked up last rotation.

Though the spirits have been up, Cody has noticed the uncharacteristically muted mood of his general. Just last week, they were reviewing strategies for General Unduli's next campaign and it as quite obvious he was not paying attention.

"Something wrong, sir?"

Months ago, Cody wouldn't feel comfortable asking such a direct personal question, but the campaigns as of late have really brought them to the point of being candid with one another. General Kenobi has gotten better about actually answering him as well.

"Not wrong, per say, just..." Kenobi sighed and looked at him. "The end of the war is near, Cody. I can feel it, but I'm unsure of how to interpret this feeling."

So Jedi stuff. There's not much he can do about that, but he is curious. Jedi stuff makes absolutely no sense to him, but it has been a huge strategical help. "Is it a bad feeling?"

"It's nondescript."

"So it could also be good?"

The general wagered this. "It's hard to say and difficult to explain, unfortunately. It's like..." He grabbed a half-filled glass of water and his caff. He scooped out some of the caff with a spoon and held it over the water cup. "The Force is like this water. Clear, easy to see through." He then let a few drops of caff fall into it. Cody watched the dark liquid spread and intermingle with the water, making it a very light brown. "But since the start of the war, the Force has become clouded," another two spoonfuls of caff. The liquid darkened again. He took another spoonful but this time tilted it so just a small drop fell from the spoon every few seconds. "And now it feels like there is a constant drip, every day, clouding the Force more and more." The water soon became dark brown, and General Kenobi held it up. Cody tried to look through the glass, but the image of the general's face on the other side was distorted and dark. He could hardly make out the details of his facial features. "So when I feel these feelings, it's hard to tell if they're good, bad, or just too clouded to see through."

Cody stared at the cup and then at the grim expression of General Kenobi.

"And... what if there is more caff than water, so to say? What does that mean?"

Kenobi looked at him and then took the cup of caff, pouring the rest of it into the water. The cup sloshed, immediately turning an inky black from the strong caff, and when it became still Cody sees that it is completely opaque.

"Then darkness will have won."

The med bay doors open and Ledy walks back in, a droid by her side this time.

"Pardon the wait, commander," she says, stopping at his bedside. The droid holds a tray of tools, none of which look pleasant. It's strange to Cody that a droid would be her assistant instead of one of the medical shinies. He raises an eyebrow.

"Is Helix out today?"

"Helix?"

"Well, yes, the lead medic."

Ledy nods and then picks up a scanner.

"Of course. Yes, Helix is otherwise occupied. Tell me, Commander, what ship are we on?"

Cody glances around the barren med bay. "The Negotiator."

"And who is your commanding officer?"

"General Kenobi... why are you asking me--"

"Routine questions, sir. And what planet did you last step foot on?"

"Kooriva."

"Okay..." she stares down at her datapad, typing things in. "I need to do a brain scan."

Her behavior is offputting. When she raises the scanner he dodges. "I would like to speak to Helix. Or General Kenobi."

"I'm afraid they're... both otherwise occupied, commander. Just let me--"

"Both of them?" this sets off warning bells in his head. Of course, the general was also hurt-- he wouldn't have let Cody fall if he weren't already injured himself. If there's anything he can count on, it's General Kenobi putting himself in the line of fire to save the others. If Kenobi really is indisposed, then he needs to find him to give a report to the council. "I must see him immediately." Cody moves to stand, but Ledy presses a hand on his chest, holding him back.

"No, commander, that isn't possible. You must stay in bed."

"I must alert the Jedi council--"

"Commander Cody," she says loudly, sighing. "You're confused."

He blinks, cocking his head. "The only thing I'm confused about, is why you're trying to detain me when I need to be checking on my general."

Cody ignores her pleas and throws the blanket off his body, swinging his feet out of bed. He's in a medical gown but he doesn't care. Something strange is going on here and he is going to find out what.

But as he stands, a wave of dizziness and nausea hits him like a tidal wave, and the walls go sideways. Cody hits the ground hard, his vision going white as his headache spikes.

Ledy doesn't rush to him, only calmly walks around the bed. He watches three of her approach, crouching down and looking at him with a smug expression.

"You're confused, commander. The war is over. The Jedi are dead. Your general is dead."

And it rushes back. All at once. Painfully. Grevious. Utapau. Order 66. Watching the cliffside explode and Kenobi fall hundreds of feet to a pit of water.

They never found his body, though. And General Kenobi has survived worse than a bad fall. A part of him still feels like he's out there somewhere no matter how many times he's been told the old master would have resurfaced by now.

While usually thinking of the Jedi and the war and all of it makes him angry, now he just feels this sense of emptiness in his chest. Cody believes in the Empire, believes in the new order, but he'd be lying if there isn't a part of him that misses living and working alongside his brothers. Working with the Jedi even though they turned out to be traitors.

"Oh," is all Cody can say, staring up at the medic. Helix is gone. So is Kix. She finally extends her hand, helping him to a sitting position. His head still spins.

"You have a bad concussion. With this memory loss, I need to check for bleeds, commander. Preferably without you flailing around like an imbecile."

He nods, ashamed of his outburst. "Yes, ma'am, I will comply."

He climbs back into bed, and Ledy begins her scan. As he lays on his side he eyes Ledy's cup of caff, and is reminded of the conversation he thought was only a week ago but must have been several years back now.

Kenobi was right, he realizes. Darkness took over.

Cody swallows the thickness that has formed in this throat, pushing out the warm memories of the way things used to be. There is no room for him to be reminiscent anymore.

The Jedi are dead. The Republic has fallen. Long live the Empire.

[sweetchup]

N.E.R.D.S

Type: Shalnark x reader

Au?: None

Word count: 3,000+

Warnings: Slight Mature content, Slight Yandere/Stalkerish themes, and Shalnark being a Shark

Today was going to be the last day. The last day at this terrible job. After this shift you were going to call up your boss and officially quit.

At first working at a nearby Cyber Cafe sounded fun. It was close to your flat and had a reasonable paycheck. Plus being surrounded by video games and fellow nerds sounded even fun. Yet it wasn’t. You should’ve walked out on your first day, for in the very first moments of walking into the place you stepped onto a melted, probably expired as well, chocolate bar. In your brand new shoes as well. It was disgusting and tragic, yet not the worst thing that has happened at this job.

In a simple sense while you worked here you weren’t an employee of a fine establishment, you were basically a servant. You were called upon again and again to make food and drinks for people, picked up after people when they left, yelled at when prices were too high or you told them what to do, jeered at by your boss, deal with horrible and lazy coworkers and had to fix the computers when they broke down (instead of taking it to a proper tech shop).

Most of the time, you could deal with that. You would just bite your tongue and give your most friendliest employee smile. But in no ways you could handle the many costumers you were groped or harassed by. Half the time you just wanted to take one of the electric cords, wrap it around their neck and just strangle them. But you were a reasonable person, a responsible adult so you would just report it to your manager. Though, of course, the situation was mostly just shrugged off. According to him, customers know best. What a load of bullcrap.

If customers truly knew best then why were you on your knees cleaning the 33th piece of trash scattered at this computer station. Hell you had filled 1 ½ trash bags just by yourself from cleaning up after people. That was too much. They should know how to pick up after themselves, you aren’t their mother.

Stretching and popping your back, you stand up. All the empty stations were finally sparkling cleaned. Though it did come at the price of your back. You’ll probably need to see a chiropractor or at least get a message from all the leaning and bending over you do at your job.

It also didn’t help that your coworker, Susan, called in sick last minute so you were stuck with an extra shift today and the graveyard shift at that.

“Sick my ass..” You grumbled under your breath, making your way back to your desk in the corner.

Since the place wasn’t busy tonight you could probably get away with watching anime or playing a new game. Hell even a nap if you got comfortable enough. Yet you stop when you see someone. His head was down on the desk but you knew it was him just from his golden hair being lighted up from the computer screen.

‘What was his name again? Shalnark? Yeah shalnark.’

Shalnark was an unfamiliar face. He showed up randomly at the cafe three days ago. It was pretty hard not to notice him. Wearing a lilac purple outfit and a constant smile on his face, he hadn’t moved since he entered. Tapping away constantly at the computer in front of him. He had been pretty nice to you and even cleaned up after himself. You actually liked talking to him the few times you talked. Though it was somewhat creepy when for some reason he knew your name when he first checked in. Though that was probably due to your name tag or maybe you had met once before at a party or something, you seemed close in age.

On top of that it was gobsmacking, yet pretty impressive, that he has slept once in the 3 days he’s been here. The other coworkers caught onto it as well in their shifts when you weren’t here. Yet it seems even Shalnark can’t run away from Father Sleep. Especially based on the fact he was currently faced down on his desk, with empty coffee cups surrounding him of course.

Suddenly you shiver as another puff of cold air comes out of the air conditioner. That was another thing you didn’t understand about the owner. Why in the world did he keep the cafe at freezing temps? Even in the winter right now. Biting your lip and rubbing your hands across the thick sweater on your arms for warmth you look concerned at Shalnark.

Was he cold? Normally you wouldn’t care about customers but he seemed like a nice guy, well except for the first time you talked but even then, it was probably your name tag. You just couldn’t help but be concerned since he was wearing a tank top in the winter.

Making up your mind you grabbed one of the many blankets and pillows in the lobby and walked over to him. Shakily you stand over him, slightly scared to wake the attractive man up from his slumber.

As you think over your decision you notice something interesting on the computer screen in front of you.

“The Dragon Eye Collection…”

It was on his notepad too. Why was he researching the Dragon Eye Collection? Sure they were a collection of 5 of the most beautiful fire opals in the world. But they were owned by the emperor, more like dictator, HuinYa Fushi of the Baiys Region. Due to his way of ruling with an iron fist, no one knew what they looked like or where they were exactly located, all that people knew was that they definitely exist. What in the world would Shalnark want with that? Was he maybe a reporter or even a Gem hunter? Though that wasn’t any of your concern. You shouldn’t pry into someone's life or business like that anyways.

Placing your hand on Shalnark’s shoulder you ever so lightly shake him. How was he asleep? His skin was practically frozen to the touch.

“Mr Shalnark?”

After a few more soft calls of his name he finally awoke. Sitting up, he squints under the computer’s harsh glow and looks over to you. He blinked a couple of times more, clearing struggling to keep himself awake. Though the bags under his eyes already told you he was plenty sleep deprived.

“I’m sorry for waking you, Mr Shalnark. But I came to bring you a blanket and a pillow. I wouldn’t want you to hurt your neck or catch a cold.”

You hold out for the blanket and pillow for him to take but he only shakes his head. His usual smile across his face, though it was less pleasant now with the bags under his eyes.

“Thank you (y/n)! But, please, there’s no need. I need to get back to wor…….”

The smile across his face disappears and his head droops down. He seems to practically, almost, pass out right then and there but he thankfully catches himself. Trying to somehow play it off, he leans an arm against the desk.

“To work! Yes work! I'm a very busy man after all.” Shalnark laughs off. Giving you a wink, he turns his attention back to screen in front of him.

Biting your lip you don’t know what to do. You definitely don’t believe he’s ok yet you also can’t force him to sleep. You two are strangers after al—

“Oh!” You let out in surprise and shock.

With a quick reflex you lung forward and catch Shalnark before his head hits the desk. Thank goodness you were still standing there, that could have really hurt. You lean him back but Shalnark stops you as he grabs on one your arm that was holding onto his shoulder and a little across the front of his chest. With tired eyes he shoots you an apologetic look.

“Sorry I didn’t know what came over me at that moment.” He apologizes; squeezing your arm.

You bit your lip again for the third time tonight. He needs sleep. He can’t continue going on like this, he could actually get hurt or even sick. Ever so lightly you push him to lean back into his chair. He goes to rebut you but you lean down to his face, making him go quiet.

“I’m sorry Mr Shalnark but I think you should go to bed.”

“But—“

Playfully you hold a finger up to his nose and boop it.

“No buts Mister. It’s time for bed.”

It was unprofessional and even childish of you to boop a grown man’s nose and tell him it’s time for bed. But you could easily see he was obviously trying to fight back and hooping his nose seemed to stun him.

While he was still stunned, you reclined the big office chair and put the blanket and pillow on him. It wasn’t as comfy as a bed but anything is better than sleeping hunched over a desk at this point.

As you finally get him to settle in his eyes begin to droop, yet he seems to continue to try and fight against it. Reaching a hand out you rub and groom Shalnark’s hair. He looks up at you as you shoot him a small smile.

“You need to go to bed, Shalnark. It’s okay to take a rest sometimes you know.”

His eyes go wide for a second and he opens his mouth wide like a fish.

“It’s you…it’s actually you. I can’t… the troupe is relying on me… I need to stay awake to figure out the location… the boss is relying on… me…” Shalnark mumbles out. His voice getting quieter and quieter.

And with that Shalnark was out cold.

Well at least you figured out that he does know you from somewhere. You wonder where. Also, the boss huh? He had to do something for him?

You looked over to the computer screen and notes in front of you. No wonder he was stressed out. You would be too if your boss and all of your workplace was relying on you to figure this out.

You could…you could always help him. You check the clock behind you. It was around 2am. Even if you took a nap now it wouldn’t be for much time and you did want to quit after tonight.

Making a decision you pull a chair over and look around you. The coast was clear as no one seemed to be watching. Stretching your fingers you put them to the keyboard and activate your aura.

You didn’t use Nen often but you were a talent transmitter. Through vigorous training you had managed to turn your Nen into data and electric signals. It was useless in battle for all you could do at most was glitch your body but, then again, you were never much of a fighter either.

Glitching and hacking through vast codes on the computer you finally make it onto the secret government site of the Fushi Empire. That was a piece of cake for you. You could probably even sneak in an episode of Bokemon after all this was done before you had to leave.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What do you mean you quit?!?”

Sighing you leaning against the counter. Tapping your fingers against the surface. “Like I said before I quit. It’s just not the right job for me.”

“You can’t! I won’t allow you, you un—“

Done with your manager's bullshit you hang up the phone and take a sip from your coffee. After a couple of more sips you were able to finish the cup. Walking around the desk you toss the cup into the trash.

Taking one last look at the place around you, you grab your bag. You would like to say you will miss the place but… you definitely won’t. This place could burn in hell for all you cared.

Wrapping your jacket tighter you step out of the building and into the cold. Wow you didn’t even realize it was still snowing from last night. It was actually nice to see snow in the city for the first time.

Your phone suddenly dings, a text from your landlord?. Oh! Someone had finally accepted your roommate's application for your flat. That’s awesome. Biting your lip, you just type back ‘yes’.

You technically should’ve looked into the document she sent along with the text which was about the roommate. But you just really need someone to split the rent with you so you honestly didn’t care who it was at this point.

“(Y/n)!”

Jumping, startled and surprised, you turn around fast at the call but are suddenly knocked over and in a snowbank. Now wide awake, you moan in discomfort as Wetness seeps into your jacket from the snow and you begin to wiggle at the coldness at your skin.

“W-What the hell?! Get off of me!” You yell out, startled and still unsure who is above you. Was this some creepy stalker? You hoped not. Wiggling more faster now, you try to get out of the snow.

You stop dead in your tracks as you hear a groan above you. Finally able to see the person, you realize it was no other than Shalnark above you. His mouth slightly open and a dark expression on his face.

What had you— oh god. You blush a crimson red. Could this get anymore embarrassing? You hadn’t realized that while you were trying to get away you hadn’t also, unintentionally, rubbed against his crotch.

Apologizing profusely, you somehow now get up and hold out a shaky hand to help him up as well. Shalnark smiled at you. Though it wasn’t like his usual smile it had an unnerving tint to it now that sent a shiver up your spine.

Startled and uneasy you decide to look away at something else. Wow did the wall get a new crack in it? Oh man that sure is interesting. Did Mrs Glain change out the lilacs again? That was nice of her—

“(Y/n)?”

You grow stiff at Shal’s voice and hesitantly meet his gaze. It still made you uneasy. Everything was the same about him yet you can’t help but feel on edge and slightly violated in his presence now. You just couldn’t figure out why.

“Y-yes?”

“I just wanna say thanks for the information you got me! Boss will sure be happy. Hmmmm….I’m not sure how you got these, you must be a really skilled hacker.”

He expressively gestures to the papers in his bag that you printed and wrote on.

“Oh yeah umm no problem.” You nonchalantly answer. Trying to ignore his hacker comment.

“I’m just wondering... how did you get into those websites (y/n)? It sure was hard for me.”

Shalnark asks and secretly shuffles a little closer to you, still an unchanging smile on his face. He was weirdly sneaky about it. Now this was just starting to get creepy. Then you suddenly realize something, did he not realize?

“A-ah I just had to find out the right codes and inputs and stuff you know?”

You start to shuffle back. You didn’t mind being asked questions or someone moving closer. It’s just… you just realized... Blushing you start to move a little faster away.

“Ah-h I really have to get home you-u know? Work just finished and stuff and I have to get rested up for my next shift. You—you know being a good employee and stuff. I’ll see you again sometimes.” Stuttering and tripping over your words you finally walk away from Shalnark. You were just glad you were out of that mess. That was so embarrassing and creepy.

Sighing, you grab your phone from your pocket and turn it on. You scroll through your apps for a little before stopping and selecting “Bokemon Go”. You needed to see if the new bokemon “Baporine” was in the area after all.

“Oh you like Bokemon Go as well. I didn’t take you as such a nerd (y/n)~”

Startled, you let out a ‘eep’ and crane your neck to see that Shalnark was literally right behind you. He literally got as close as he could without touching. It also didn’t help that he still had…

Face red again at the thought you fast walk to the bus stop. Though that didn’t work for Shalnark was on your tail the whole time, constantly asking questions.

“I was just joking (y/n)! I love that game as well.”

“Oh have you caught the new Baporine?”

“Wait, do you also know Nen? I think I see aura around you~.”

“Hahah you totally do. What category are you?”

“Do you—“

Reaching the bus you had finally had enough of his antics. Pulling him down by his collar, you glare at him.

“Why are you following me?” You whispered yelled at him. He looks confused for a second before letting out a teasing smile.

“So we are whispering now? Is this a sec—“ You cut him off.

“Answer my question.”

He opens his mouth to do so but before he can, the thing you couldn’t look at or say is, is finally said out loud. And by a young child at that.

“Mommy. Why wrong with that man’s pants? Why is there a bump in the front—“

The mother doesn’t make it better, of course, and lets out a screech in shock. Quickly shielding the child’s eyes and pulling the child away. Leaving you two alone at the bus stop.

Your face beet red and frozen in embarrassment you look at Shalnark’s face.. He looks down at his *ahem* problem and looks back at you. And he, I shit you not, looks you dead in the eye and says.

“Ah so that’s what’s wrong?” He says. Kind of amazed, yet kind of shrugging it off.

“WHAT THE HELL?!? HOW DID YOU NOT REALIZE IT BEFORE” You screech out. Totally losing your cool.

He pouts at your freak out.

“I just didn’t realize it.”

Rubbing your temples you take a deep breath and look at the most likely mid-twenties man in the eyes.

“How do you not realize you are walking around with a full on erection??”

“Well It just doesn’t usually happens. I usually don’t get excited by a girl easily. Though I do usually like to toy with the smart ones,” He suddenly looks down at your chest. His face blushing a little and a small smile spreading across his face. “It also doesn’t help that you have the perfect pair of—“

You clamp your hand over his mouth before he can finish that sentence. You didn’t want to know what he was thinking. You were honestly tired. Working two back to back shifts wasn’t easy.

“Shalnark. Please just… just go home.” You say exhausted and defeated.

You drop your hand from his mouth and he only looks at you confused.

“Hmm? But I am?”

“Hah?!?” Now angry you grab the man by his shirt. You might actually fulfill your life long dream of strangling a man today, “What the hell is that supposed to mean?!?”

Shalnark smiles; an unsettling one at that and grabs his phone from his pocket. As you look at the red phone your stomach drops to the ground. Oh. That number and conversation means. Oh god.

Shalnark giggles and leans over to your ear. His warm breath against the shell causes a shiver up your spine. Taking a gulp and you hear him whisper two dreaded words.

“Hello roomie~”

You should’ve checked the document.

Bonus:

(On the bus)

“Hey (y/n)~ now that we are roommates you wouldn’t mind if we fuc—“

“Shal. Just take a cold shower”

“Huh?!? You're so mean (y/n)! You’re nothing like the girl that took care of me last night. Oh~ Mr Shalnark~ your so handsome Mr—”

“F***king hypocrite”

“Why did you hit me?! That hurt!”

[onelamewriter]

Suga, Daichi, Tanaka, and Noya with a S/O who’s Great at Volleyball

Request: Can you do suga and daichi + tanaka and nishinoya with a seemingly lazy s/o that somehow turns out to be a very experienced volleyball player? Thanks!

A/N: This ask spoke to me on so many levels sjkjsksjsk. Hope that my brief days of volleyball but constant lazy mood serve for something (was that a pun???). I tried to make the reader gender neutral, failing if you squint. Enjoy and send requests!

Sawamura Daichi

Daichi was already very well aware of your reluctance to do, well, any physical activity. And while he tried to get you to do some exercise and accompany him on his morning runs, he didn’t pry much more.

So one day the team is in desperate need for practice due to a practice match with Nekoma approaching, but their gym is under maintenance and therefore unable to use.

And since the basketball team + girls volleyball gym is also under their use constantly, they can’t borrow theirs either.

Coah Ukai tells them to call it off and not to worry, that that’d do no good and it’d be better to not stress themselves out too much. Advised them to practice a bit on their own until the gym is fixed.

But Daddychi is stressedichi because they still have some things to tune, try new tosses and spikes and uughhh they can’t do that without a proper place.

Daichi comes home to you after the terrible announcement is made, looking very disheartened and glum as he repeated the news to you.

So you, being an amazing partner, offer him and his team a place to practice — a gymnasium no one uses anymore very close to where you live.

Daichi is just so happy that he doesn’t even questions how you know it, just to tell him a day and time to take the team there.

So the day arrives, you wait for Daichi and his team at the gates and right after school the volleyball team is following the ever leisure you like a group of ducklings.

After an uphill trek to the place, the boys found themselves in front of a large gymnasium with just a little bit of rust at the walls and some foliage, but otherwise in a good state.

You open the doors with the key (which should’ve been a clue) and once inside you turn on the lights, revealing a surprisingly clean training area, with nets, scoreboards and such. The team gaped, since the inside certainly didn’t looked like the outside at all, but you shrug them off and usher them to get started with practice, and so they do.

You just lean against the wall near the doors, arms crossed over your chest with a watchful eye on each of them as they do their thing, often dropping some tips and corrections here and there, and that’s when Daichi is like ??? cuz everything you’re saying is,, accurate and makes sense and the boys are getting better???

So as they’re taking a break Daichi comes up to you and asks you how do you know so much about volleyball, sure he’s talk to you about, maybe even tried teaching you a little, but none of the advise you gave were remotely similar to the simplistic stuff he’s told you.

And when you very nonchalantly tell him you used to be in a top team??

“Come again?” Daichi dumbly uttered, an absent smile on his face as though he didn’t quite understood.

“I used to be part of a team,” You repeat, an amuse smirk making its way to your face as your boyfriend’s eyes widen considerably. “We used to be real good too, almost a Shiratorizawa level in the rankings of Miyagi and all.”

“You— I— you were in a—” Daichi sputtered, eliciting a laugh out of you as he took a deep breath to recollect his thoughts, waiting until your laughing fit was done to squeak out a, “How?”

“Eeesh, you think so lowly of me? I’m kinda hurt, love.” You feign a hurt expression and press a hand to your chest to emphasize to fake whole in your heart. Chuckling as he tried to backpedal on his wording and scramble to spew apologies to you before you cut him off with a lazy wave. “‘S fine, can’t blame ya,”

Daichi breathes out a sigh of relief before actually asking something. “You... keep saying used to, why aren’t you playing anymore?”

“We got to nationals and that was it for me, I guess.” You answered, glancing at your shoes and missing his eyes widening once again. “That was kinda my one goal, and after that was done I guess I was too. Heh, the team’s still wanting me to rejoin them, but it’s too much of a hassle.”

“You don’t like it anymore?” his question came a bit too sharp, and it certainly hit a cord in you from the way you flinched slightly.

“That’s...” Seeing as you sighed wearily, Daichi took it upon himself to voice his thoughts, leaning on the wall right beside you where your arms were grazing each other. “I think you still do.”

“Huh?” You breathed out, eyebrows lifted

“You seem to know a lot, possibly more than I do, and you’ve gone to nationals, that’s one heck of an achievement!” He complemented, leaning forward so he was making eye contact with you and nodded to the court. “You can help us a lot, and I’m sure our advisor and coach would appreciate it. Plus, from the way you kept looking at our plays... I think you still want to play volleyball— and I get that!”

“But... If you decide to go back in court with your team, just know that I’ll be supporting you all the way!” He gave you a warm smile, one of those he reserves for you and you only, and you couldn’t help smile back, although understandably mellow, and nodded with a quiet okay. “I think we have to get back into practice, before Kageyama bonks Hinata on the head again,” he sweatdropped, snapping his head to you with a half-heartedly stern expression. “You have to tell me more about your sport days though. Everything in detail!”

You couldn’t help the joyous laugh that escaped your throat at his order, and waved him off. “Sure sure, now go save your decoy, Captain,” And as he went to separate the oddball duo, you smiled softly to yourself in thought. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad...

Sugawara Koushi

Sugawara’s another one who tried to get you to do some physical activities, but much more playfully than Daichi’s attempts. But after he noticed you wouldn’t budge from your position in bed or the couch (depending on he day) he very quickly gave up and decided to tease you about it and cuddle with you, because he is a man of culture.

The two of you got to Karasuno, so you were often waiting for him after classes either outside or inside the gym (depending on whether you felt like napping or not). He also told you many times to go home and eat something and not wait for him until three-thirty.

On this particular occasion you found yourself inside watching the boys (mostly your boy) practice, secretly taking mental notes about their plays and forms. You internally cringe at the horrible receives their current ginger boy has, and the salty french fry too. Huh, should I have fries today...? Oh, that sounds good... Ketchup and all...

You were so lost in your own world controlled by your empty stomach that you didn’t noticed Hinata missing a receive and the now stray volleyball coming straight at you.

Almost.

Because when you hear Sugawara’s call for your name and look up from the ground, eyes locking into the incoming ball it’s like if a switch just flipped.

You immediately stick your arms out, body lowered into a semi-crouch yet face blank as ever, the satisfying bang of the ball hitting your forearms resonated throughout the gym, and the familiar sting on your forearms becoming dull fairly quickly. You watch the ball bounce off your arms and into the woodplanks.

Suga (and everyone else) is just,,, w hat??? because you, the one person in PE who uses the excuse of “I stubbed my toe,” to not stretch, just did a perfect receive and like??? now you’re just picking up bag and leaning against the wall again like it didn’t just happened???

“WOAHHH!!! (L/n)-san!! How’d you do that?!” Hinata asks as he hops around you, stars in his eyes and pumping his fists. “The ball was like ‘whoosh’ super fast! But then it went like ‘bam!’ when you received it! And then it went ‘pom!’ when it touched the ground and then—”

“Hinata get off their face, dumbass!” Kageyama scolded the tangerine, holding him by the back of his collar. “Plus it went ‘pom’ first and then ‘bam’, boke!”

“Shouldn’t you be apologizing for almost hitting them, Shrimpy?” Tsukishima snickered, picking the ball you just received. However you cut off the ginger’s attempt apologies with a lazy wave and a yawn.

“Don’t worry. I’m used to receiving harsher stray balls than that,” You nonchalantly said, causing the him to comment a “So cool!!” while the older teens just stared at you bug-eyed.

“Wh-wha— (Y/n) how do you know how to make a receive like that??” Sugawara squeaked, he nearly had a heart attack at the thought of a volleyball hitting your unsuspecting form, but now he’s ????

“Oh, I sometimes go to a volleyball camp my uncle owns on summer break. Been going there since I was little.” You scratch you arm, the stink spiking up a tiny bit. “Is practice done now?”

Now Suga’s even more bug-eyed but soon practice is finished and you and your boyfriend are walking home alongside the team (since Daichi said he’d invite you guys some pork buns and— well, who are you refuse free food?). But the earlier events are still on their head, so they question you about it.

“Oi, oi! You should teach these two how to receive, see if they get better at it!” Tanaka exclaimed while poking the blond and ginger first years on the cheeks, the former swatting his hand away while the latter wholeheartedly agreeing.

“I don’t have the energy for it though... I’d get sleepy real fast.” You said, looking between you and Suga to your intertwined hands, swinging them absently as you went.

“(Y/n),” Suga got your attention while the others continued their shenanigans, fake teary eyes and a cute pout on his face. “Why’d you never told me you played volleyball? Of all the times I’ve asked you to do something with me??”

“I don’t play, I just know how to.” You shrugged, looking down and squeezing his cold hand. “Plus, cuddling seems more fun than playing that all day...” you muttered that last part with a light pink blush on your cheeks, and so he couldn’t stay ‘mad’ any longer, cooing internally at your bashful confession.

Suga then pecked you cheeks, “I guess we can do that once we get home then,” He watched in amusement as they only grew darker in shade at his affection, eliciting an awed sound from him as he pinched your cheeks.

“K-Koushiii...”

Tanaka Ryuunosuke

He finds out through a practice match! Your school against Karasuno!

So, Tanaka here, my boy, was really pumped for this match because both Ukai and Takeda have been hyping them about this top school they’d be facing, but through his elation the name of the school might’ve slipped past him, so he was unaware that it was your school.

You just leaned on your hand as he vividly explained you how he was gonna beat the other team, and since he was already used to you mellow and quiet reactions he didn’t think much of it and kept rambling on — sort of why the two of you were such a great balance to each other, your lethargic nature being dragged around by Tanaka’s energetic activities, his own boisterous persona  taking it down a notch by your gentle coaxing (read: kisses).

You see, you already knew your school was facing off against his —after all, you were the one to request it in the first place — but you didn’t want to ruin the surprise yet and kept quiet, inwardly laughing to yourself when Tanaka imitated a spike and kept with his demonstration.

The day of the practice match comes around and soon the rival school knocks to their door, bowing to thank them for having them and to have a good game. When they straightened their posture though, Tanaka stares at one of the players that looks oddly familiar.

Blinks one, twice, thrice... and then literally reels back in pure shock, mouth hanging open.

(Y-Y/N)?!?” He gasps loudly and dramatically as you give him a lopsided grin and a peace sign.

“Osu,”

“Buh — BUT HOW?!” He sputtered, earning a disapproving look from Daichi.

“You really didn’t know we were facing their school?”

“W-well, no! But — ugh,” Tanaka snapped his head to your still grinning form, you caught on quickly to his frustrated yet still shocked expression and put your hands up in mock surrender.

“I didn’t want to spoil the surprise,” You stuck your tongue out. “As captain,I can’t gave all my cards shown.”

“CAPTAIN?!”

“This is so good,” Suga stifled a laugh, choosing to shake his head and place his hands on his hips. “I am a bit surprised though, didn’t thought (L/n) here would be a pro player— ah, no offence!”

“I really don’t think you can offend this bozo with anything, really.” One your vice captain said, nudging you with their shoulder as you stupidly nodded your head in affirmation.

“I wouldn’t have guessed it myself, but I guess the element of surprise is gonna make us wipe the floor with ya in your own turf.” Now that got him perked up and shoved his fleeting soul back to his body, and it also sparked the flame o rivalry within the other boys. Without further ado, the match started and Tanaka was left speechless.

You were a Setter and your skills were nothing short of spectacular, both a a player alone and as a captain, and it showed in the way you managed to get your Ace past Asahi’s and Tsukishima’s blocks in the first minute of the second set, simultaneously inspiring the rest of your team to fend off against their tricks.

The many times your Libero and blockers shut down Kageyama’s and Hinata’s quick attacks took its toll on the boys and morale. Tanaka might’ve gotten distracted by your perfect form and leadership skills a few times, all of which he had to be snapped out of by Daichi.

In the end, you guys played a total of three matched, with your team winning the first and last ones. At the end of it all the coaches allowed both teams to mingle and bond, while yours gave some pointers and corrections to Karasuno, which most of them took wholeheartedly (you felt Kageyama’s glare-like-stare on you while so), all the while Tanaka stayed by your side and followed you like an adoring puppy.

“What is it?” You questioned and finally directed your attention to him as you waited outside for any signs of your bus to pick you guys up.

“You’re amazing,” Tanaka breathlessly answered, sparks in his eyes as he stared at you admiringly. “Oh my god, my s/o’s amazing...” he repeated quietly to himself, as though not believing it. You laughed aloud, not surprised by his impulsive replied but nonetheless bemused.

“Well, I couldn’t really go half-assed when passion is in everything you do. Your team’s pretty strong, so I’d have to watch out for you guys down the road.” He nodded vigorously and kept gushing about your skills, you returning each compliment with one of your own in a more lax manner. Once your bus arrived and the teams were formally bidding each other farewell, you sneaked a quick peck to your boyfriend’s unsuspecting lips.

“We oughta chat a bit more later, ’kay?” and with a final wave to your blushy, swooning boyfriend, you boarded the bus.

Nishinoya Yuu

Also through a game, but this time it’s an official one! Qualifier of the Miyagi prefecture representative for Nationals, at that.

First off, you and Nishiyona? Definition of opposites attract. Like, I’m not joking when I say the boys vb team was shooketh to their core when you sluggishly arrived at the gym one day and asked for Noya, saying he was you boyfriend.

You were pretty surprised yourself when he confessed too, considering he didn’t seem to like your lethargic, lackluster attitude that much. But according to him, “The way your eyes light up when you speak about things you’re passionate for makes up for your lack of everything else!”

And you were like, “lmao ok, let’s hang”

But all that is beyond the point! The focus here is: Noya really, really, really wanted you to come see him play in the qualifiers, seeing as you’ve missed pretty much his other big games and most matches so far, under the same excuse that you already had a prearranged event that couldn’t be postponed nor that you could miss.

While very whiny and pouty, he understood and let it slide (under the deal tat you gotta pamper him in kisses before he departs and to wish him good luck every five minutes (tops), to which you agreed humorously).

So the qualifying day is here and, under a close call, Karasuno comes out on top and the team decided to stay and watch the other matches. They sat on the bleachers of the gym and watched the ongoing match in analytical silence as they ate a few snacks.

Honestly they were... worried about this. The team that came out the victor would be the team they’d face, and one of them was destroying the other in this last set. 10-24, that’s painful to bare.

However Noya’s eyes were glued to one player, who if he had to guess, seemed to be the Ace of the winning team and an Opposite Hitter from the amount of points they’ve scored. Zoning in their oddly familiar (h/c) hair, sluggish movements whenever they were in the back row, yet never switched out for the Libero.

Karasuno was sitting in their side of the court, so he couldn’t see their face too well, but as the Ace jumped to score the final point, and turned around to face their cheering teammates, he felt his eyes widen like saucers,

“(Y/N)?!” Nishinoya shouted over the cheering of the crowd the team, but it still caught your attention at the sound of your name in the familiar tone you’ve grown accustomed to.

Encouraged by the call, you turned to look over your shoulder slowly, half-lidded eyes widening a fraction as you locked eyes with your gobsmacked boyfriend’s, his team’s nervous inquiries falling flat.

“Yuu...?” You slowly twisted your body fully to acknowledge him. He must’ve won his match then...

That’s when it dawned on you; Noya had won his match, and you did yours, that means you will be facing one another for the last round before the finals. Neither of you were going to let up, you both knew that, you also knew the barrage of questions he’ll throw your way the second you’re free were just as impending.

So, as tired and sweaty as you were, you raised an arm and five fingers, duly noting the cameras following your movements, more focused on the way Noya’s eyes widened and said, “Five minutes,”

You allowed yourself to smile intimidatingly, shifting your fingers so you were now pointing straight at him.

“Good luck.”

[batfam-imagines]

Pregnant Batsis

Request: So we all know how badass Batmom is, but how about a badass, single mother batsis? Maybe she is older or like a year younger than dick, but she took pregnancy and taking care of her baby like a true warrior. How do you think the bat fam will take that?

 A/N: So I don’t know if I quite followed the prompt, but I did my best! I’m a little rusty when it comes to writing! Hope you guys like it!

--

“I have an announcement to make” Glancing around to make sure everyone is paying attention, you focus your attention on Bruce, “I’m pregnant, 22 weeks if what the doctor said is right”

Surprisingly Jason is first one to react, “Are you both healthy? You were literally out on patrol yesterday ...! Why the fuck were you out on patrol if you’re pregnant?!?”

“I just found out for sure this morning, and I’ve only had suspicions for like a week. According to all the scans she took today everything looked fine”

Dick finally seems to get over his shock, “Did you get any pictures? Is it a boy or a girl?”

“Yeah, I did. I’ll show you in a few minutes, Dickie.” Bruce still hasn’t said anything, “B? Are you alright?”

“I assume the father is still in the picture? And that you’ll be resuming Patrol once the child is born? You know how important the Mission is, and even these few months without Sparrow’s presence will put a strain on everyone else”

Tim’s brow furrows, “That’s what you think of? The Mission? Your oldest daughter just told you she was pregnant and all you want to know about is when she’s gonna be back on the street. You can’t even say congratulations?!”

Holding up a hand, you step between everyone, “Calm down. It’s fine, Timmy. B, the father isn’t in the picture anymore. When I told him, I might be pregnant he said that he didn’t want anything to do with me or the baby and said that he would hand over all parental rights when the baby was born, and I’ve already moved into my own apartment. And I didn’t intend to go back to Patrolling full time after the baby. I’ll come out in emergencies, but I was going to have Babs teach me how to man the comms while I’m pregnant.”

“I think that’s a great idea. You can be there if the little tyke needs you, and you can give Babs a break every once a while.” Jason throws you a smirk, “Between us and the girls we’re driving her batty”

“That was terrible, Todd, however having Y/N on communications would be much more preferable to Gordon.” Your youngest brother shifts out from under the arm Dick slings across his shoulders, “I would also very much like to see the pictures of the child”

Sitting down on the large empty couch, all your brothers gather around to look at the various pictures, “We couldn’t find out the gender today, the ultrasound technician said that the baby wasn’t in a good position to tell anything.”

Unfortunately, Bruce doesn’t seem interested in looking at pictures, he just gets up and leaves the room.

--

Two days later there’s a knock on your apartment door. It isn’t any of your brother, because one of the first things they made you promise was to give them 24/7 access to your apartment.

“Y/N, it’s me. Please open the door” Opening the door a crack, you and Bruce lock eyes, “Can I come in? I think we have some things to talk about”

“Just so you know, I told Steph and Cass last night about the baby. Cass did that angry stare thing when I told them about your reaction, and Steph threatened to put itching powder in the Batsuit”

Bruce snorts, “I wouldn’t expect else from Stephanie, and I already got a video-call from Cassandra. She was actually the one to convince me to come here.”

“Because we all know you’re emotionally stunted, and wouldn’t have come here on your own”

“Right” Bruce shifts awkwardly, “Please, Y/N. I realized that the other day could have been handled better”

“Yeah, alright, fine. Come in. Excuse the mess, the boys were over last night, and I haven’t had a chance to clean up”

“It’s fine, I know how much of a mess those boys can make” Bruce glances around at he empty pizza boxes on the counter and the blankets piled on the couch before sitting on the empty side of it.

Taking a seat in the arm chair, you lean forward, “So what did you want to talk about?”

“I wanted to say that I am sorry for the way I reacted the other night when you announced your pregnancy. No matter what you’re my daughter, and I don’t want anything to come between us. This family has enough problems, without me adding another one to it. I don’t want to create another rift between myself and my children, Y/N, especially when there will be a new little one soon. I hope that you can accept my apology, and if you don’t want me in the child’s life, I hope that you will at least let me still contact you”

“Wow, I think that’s the most I’ve heard you talk without yelling in a long time. Of course I want you in mine and the baby’s life, B! I was hoping you’d get your head out of your ass soon so you could be a grandfather. This means I’ll have to call the other’s and call off all the pranks”

Bruce chuckles, “I would appreciate that, but you know your brothers will still do something in retaliation.”

“Oh, I know, but if I at least tell them you apologized it might not be as bad.” Glancing towards the clock, you flash a grin at Bruce, “Now, as the final part of your apology you’re going to take me out to lunch and then we’re going to go people-watch at the mall”

“Whatever you say, Y/N. Why don’t you call your brothers and ask if they want to come? Alfred is already preparing dinner for everyone tonight, Stephanie and Cass are flying back from their mission now, so everyone will be there”

“So you’ll get to spend the whole day with me! Aren’t you lucky, B!” Bruce chuckles, “I’m gonna go get dressed and call everyone”

--

Thankfully, there are no other family problems during the pregnancy, and everything progresses like normal. Barbra teaches you how to hack and how to man the Comms. There are a few instances where someone comes back to the Cave hurt and Alfred starts teaching you how to patch everyone up. During the day you continue to teach Criminal Justice classes at Gotham University.

“Guys, will you quit. I’m pregnant, not an invalid, I can still go to work!”

Even Bruce looks concerned, “Are you sure? You have to stand in front of class … should you even be standing anymore? Are you sure this apartment has enough room for you and the baby? I can still get you a better one, or you could move back into the Manor -”

“Bruce! I don’t need you to buy me an apartment, I can afford this one just fine and it’s plenty big enough. I’ll come to the Manor and visit, but I like living near work. And of freaking course I can stand!”

Tim peeks over the back of the couch, “We just to make sure you’re alright, Y/N. None of us have ever really been around pregnant people, especially pregnant family”

“I know, Timmy, but sometimes you guys can be a bit much”

“If Drake or Todd are the ones causing you stress I can … get rid of them” Dick nudges Damian and raises an eyebrow, “Or just challenge them to a fight for you”

Dick rolls his eyes, “That wasn’t much better, Dami.”

“Y/N cannot fight in her condition, so I will do it for her”

“I don’t need anyone to fight for me, Dami. I’ll just make them wait until after I have the baby, and then kick their ass” Damian grins at this and nods.

--

When the baby is born, everyone is there. The boys try to distract you from the pain, Bruce is a constant presence at your side, and the girls are constantly asking the nurses questions and arguing with the boys.

“Alright, Ms. Wayne, who do you want in the room with you when it’s time to deliver?” The nurse smiles and checks the fetal monitor while asking the question.

“Just my dad, while I love my siblings, I’d rather they didn’t see my vagina”

Jason barks out a laugh, “I appreciate that, Y/N. We might be a close family, but I’ll come back after the baby is out”

“Alright, that sounds like a plan, Ms. Wayne. Everything is looking good here, the baby looks like they’re in a good position, and the heartrate is looking good too. You were at 7 centimeters when I just checked, so the contractions might be getting a little more intense. If you need anything just hit the call light”

After the nurse leaves, Bruce turns to look at you, “You really want me in here?”

“Yeah, you’re gonna be the baby’s grandfather, and … you’re my dad. I need someone’s hand to break”

--

Once you’re discharged from the hospital, everyone refuses to leave you alone. Alfred makes sure that your fridge is full, Bruce constantly stops by the apartment after work to check-in, and your siblings drop in at all times of the night and day.

“You know I can handle this myself right, I don’t need someone to constantly check on me!”

Bruce snorts, “We’re always here because we care about you and want to be a part of Alex’s life. We know you can take care yourself and your child, we aren’t questioning that. Your pregnancy just … brought everyone together. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the boys get along this well, just last night Damian and Tim had a conversation without fighting, and Cass smiles more than ever! Alfred seems to have more energy now that you named him honorary Great-Grandfather. I’ve even noticed a change in myself”

You flop down on the floor and lean against Bruce’s legs and let out a resigned sigh, “Well, when you put it like that … I guess everyone can keep coming around to bug me”

———————————————————————————–

Let me know what you think! Send any ideas or requests you have to my Ask Box!

[sebthesnipe]

Baby and Friend

First // Previous // Next

My Dearest Procyon

Other works by me

Chapter 17 

Original story based on this wonderful post by @underdog-arts

Patton glanced up at the beautiful swirling black and blues above him in the small clearing. He hadn’t realized just how much he had missed the night sky when he was cooped up in his usual cave. Despite his immense power, Patton knew it was best to stay hidden, to keep away from humanity. Not all of the human race was as accepting as Logan had been. They just weren’t ready for someone as different as he was, and unfortunately, Roman proved that was still the case.. Even so, he wished humanity  could be kinder, if not for himself, then at the very least for  Logan and Virgil’s  sake. 

“I know you’re there,” Patton called softly, a smile turning his lips up in amusement. “I can sense magical auras, silly.” 

Logan hesitantly stepped out from behind the large oak, giving an embarrassed flush as he moved forward. He had awoken to the dying fire, becoming  concerned when he discovered Patton’s small pallet empty of his sleeping form.

Seeing the dragon alone in the middle of the switchgrass had Logan pausing. The pale moonlight painted Patton’s soft features as he peered up at the endless sky. It was perhaps the most beautiful thing that the witch had ever had the privilege to witness. Patton seemed almost fragile in the gentle glow, the world around him so peaceful as the stars shined in the reflection of his eyes. Logan was fairly certain he would have been content to remain in the shadows, admiring the dragon from afar, for the rest of his days. 

“I apologize, I did not intend to disturb you,” Logan admitted.

“Don’t worry about it, Kiddo. I’m always happy to have company,” Patton grinned as he peered up at Logan, patting the ground next to him. “I’m surprised you’re not asleep like the others.”

Logan moved to sink down next to him, adjusting the cloak around his shoulders carefully so as to avoid it brushing against his back. “I don’t sleep well most nights,” he admitted softly, but chose not to elaborate for fear of causing the ancient creature undue stress. “When I woke up and you were not there, I began to worry something might have happened to you.”

Patton’s eyes grew wide as he glanced up at the lanky man next to him. Logan was worried about him? He supposed that the worry itself wasn’t surprising; Logan was such a kindhearted person and he cared so much for others. No, what was surprising was that Logan knew what Patton was, how much power he held within him, and he still worried about him. It was, well, it was extremely sweet. 

The dragon couldn’t help but give a small giddy giggle at the admission, causing the redness in Logan’s cheeks to darken as he rubbed the back of his neck in  embarrassment.

“I meant no offense, I assure you,” Logan mumbled as he averted his gaze. 

“Oh no! No offense taken!” Patton chuckled. “It's just so nice of you to be concerned about me. I guess it’s just not something I’m used to.” 

Silence fell between them as Patton’s attention turned back to the sky above them. Logan’s eyes wandered back to the other man’s features, still glowing gently in the moonlight. Logan doubted he would ever grow use to the sight before him and took a moment to try and commit Patton’s image to memory. 

“Which one is it?” Patton asked softly, eyes still upturned. 

“Hm?” Logan hummed in confusion, pulling himself from his thoughts. 

“The star,” Patton explained, glancing at the witch next to him with another soft smile that made Logan’s chest tighten almost unpleasantly with the force of an emotion he couldn’t name, “the one from the vision. Which star is it?”

It took a few seconds for Logan’s thoughts to catch up to his heart. “Oh, you mean Procyon?” he asked softly, gaze moving to glance up at the night sky as well. They didn’t look quite as bright as they always had to him; sparkling with the light of a thousand futures, the dreams that had yet to come true, the wishes of those who had passed and would come again. No, their beauty was dull in comparison to the light of the man next to him. 

“That's the one!” Patton chirped excitedly, his large eyes gazing up in wonder. The look pulled Logan’s attention back to his face, causing his breath to hitch. 

“Y-you really want to know?” Logan managed, stuttering slightly in astonishment.

“Well, yeah. I think it’s really interesting,” the dragon offered, glancing at the witch once more, his genuine smile still in place. 

“You do?” Logan was awestruck, unable to process the new information Patton was providing. No one had ever shown interest in the things he was passionate about.

“Of course,” Patton chuckled. “I’ve never met anyone with so much knowledge about what’s out there. I’ve always wondered about it. How could I not?” He turned to the small specks that littered the sky once more. “They’re the only things that stay the same no matter how old I get.”

Logan felt as if his heart seized. He knew Patton was older than he could have guessed, but he had never realized just how lonely that kind of existence could be. Patton had no doubt made countless friends throughout his lifetime, his personality was far too bright not to have, but how many of them were mortal? How many had he had to watch die, unable to protect them? How many had he had to mourn?

“Forgive me for such a rude question, Patton; but, how old are you?” Logan asked curiously, studying the man’s upturned face for a reaction. 

Attempting to hide his pain, a small twitch of an eyebrow was the dragon’s only tell. Logan managed to catch the look, but just barely. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of it, however. It could have been discomfort or sorrow, annoyance or amusement; he couldn’t be sure which. 

“I don’t remember,” Patton answered honestly, never pulling his gaze from the stars. “I lost count a long time ago. Why try and figure it out now?”

Logan stared at him. He wasn’t sure what to make of the answer. Despite Patton’s ability to hide behind his cheery composure, Logan didn’t need magic to tell him that the powerful being was hurting. 

Unsure if he was making an appropriate assumption in a moment like this, Logan shifted closer until their knees brushed against one another. He could feel the warmth of the dragon coming off in waves, heating his side pleasantly as he lifted his arm, inviting Patton in. 

Patton, unlike his human counterpart, had no reservations whatsoever. The smaller humanoid leaned in immediately to snuggle against Logan’s side, careful not to touch his injured back. His smile broadened at the gesture, giving a contented sigh as Logan wrapped an arm around his waist. 

They sat there for a few minutes, content in the silence that surrounded them as they stared up at the stars above. Logan’s mind wandered to their journey and the uncertainties they still faced. What would happen when they found what they were looking for? 

Furthermore, why had Patton decided to join them to begin with? Was it curiosity? Would he leave when all was said and done? Did he find these little mortals amusing?

There were far too many variables that Logan didn’t understand when it came to the dragon. Similarly, there were far too many questions when it came Roman. Why was he growing so close to Virgil and how could they possibly avoid his death? There was so much that didn’t add up, the witch wasn’t sure what to do with all the data. For now, however, it was best to let it be and enjoy the night sky. 

“There,” Logan explained, pointed to a small section of sky, “is the constellation of Canis Minor,” he whispered softly, leaning his cheek against the top of Patton’s soft curls. The smell of campfire and mulled sweets that was so uniquely Patton, filled Logan’s senses, almost making him dizzy. “Nestled next to the constellations of Cancer and Gemini. The brighter star is Procyon A, which is a spectral class. It suggests that Procyon A is evolving into a subgiant that has nearly fused its hydrogen core into helium, after which it will expand as the nuclear reactions move outside the core. As it expands, Procyon will swell to a maximum of one hundred fifty times its current diameter. Of course this will occur over the course of ten to one hundred million years.”

Patton gasped. “It’s still growing?! You mean it’s a baby star?!” he chittered, tilting his head against Logan’s chest to peer up at the witch. 

“I suppose that is an adequate description yes,” Logan offered, face warming at just how close they were, which had nothing to do with Patton’s natural body heat. 

“Well, that's just so gosh darn cute I don’t know what to do about it!” the monstrously powerful man admitted cheerily. Logan couldn’t help but give a small snort of amusement before turning back to his explanation. His heart was racing, pounding against his ribs uncontrollably. So much so that Logan was concerned Patton might notice. No one had ever bothered to listen to his factoids about the stars or encouraged his passion for them. Even Virgil seemed to merely suffer silently through his constant ramblings.  It was so strange. It was so new. It was so… Patton. 

“Though the human eye can not perceive it without the assistance of some very advanced machinery, there is a white dwarf just beyond Procyon A,” he pointed towards the section of the sky once more, “known as Procyon B. It is very difficult to-” Patton’s shocked gasp had the witch instantly on edge. Had he said something wrong?

“The baby has another tiny little baby friend?!” Patton cried excitedly, instantly washing away Logan’s fears. “That’s so sweet! It’s like he has a brother! Oh, Logan!! That’s so wholesome and sweet and cute and nice and beautiful!” 

Logan couldn’t help but give a soft smile at how adorable the other man was. 

“I suppose you could claim that, yes,” the witch didn’t have the heart to point out that stars did not have feelings, therefore could not experience the friendly bond Patton seemed to devise for the two. He certainly was not going to argue with what could be the most powerful creature on the planet.

“Oh that's so wonderful!” the smaller man cried as he threw his arms around Logan’s neck tackling him in a stifling embrace. Unfortunately,  Logan hissed in surprise, the hold brushing against a few of the gashes on his shoulders and the new weight throwing him off balance. 

The two toppled to the ground. Logan shifted, trying to shield Patton from the damp grass beneath them. His efforts proved to be effective, however, as he pulled Patton against his chest, the witch landed on his back, a cry of pain escaping from between his lips as the white hot tendrils of agony washed through him. 

Patton scrambled off him as quickly as he could. “Oh no! Logan I’m so sorry! I forgot!” the usually soft sweetness in his voice replaced with shame and worry. 

Logan lifted a hand to wave off the words, unable to speak as he worked through the anguish that throbbed throughout his being. His soul screamed inside the prison that was his body, the paranormal wounds far more deep-seated than the visible lashes that marred his skin. He groaned as he shifted to his side, curling into a small ball, trying not to allow the tears in his eyes to fall.

For a panicked moment, Patton remained still, guilt already eating away at him. He was so starved for physical attention he hadn’t even thought about the repercussions. He should help. He needed to help. Patton reached out a hand, resting it gently against Logan’s arm, causing the witch to give a small shudder in response. 

“I still can’t heal them, but maybe I can help,” he offered in a soft whisper. The dragon shifted closer, his free hand moving to hover over Logan’s exposed back, just above the wounds so as not to touch them. Logan briefly thought to protest, the pain far too much for him to piece together a coherent sentence in response. 

Patton’s eyes closed as he took a deep breath. It wouldn’t do much good if he messed up the spell due to his nerves. He took another inhale. As he exhaled, his tension  seemed to drift weightlessly from his shoulders like the small coils of smoke that rose from him. 

A low hum escaped him, the sound reverberating throughout his body and echoing outwards. It had been some time since he had used druidic healing magic, but it had always been one of his favorite methods after all. 

The pitch of his voice shifted, growing higher as he weaved the magical force within him around his wrist. The trickle of magic ebbed and flowed as he pushed and pulled, adjusting the melody of his droning with each twist and turn. Logan could feel the cold touch of the tapestry Patton was creating, shivering slightly as it fell over him like an icy blanket in the midst of summer. 

The hot embers of pain began to cool, sizzling out against the cold as Patton’s humming seemed to wash through the lanky witch. Logan’s body began to relax as he allowed his eyes to close, soaking in the sound of Patton’s rumbling voice. Even in such a setting, the dragon sounded beautiful. All of Logan’s cares seemed to drift away like a bad dream he couldn’t seem to remember. The aches and pains of the day were gone, replaced with a delicious sense of peace.

The humming began to subside, Patton pulling his hand back with a small smile.

“There,” he nodded, obviously satisfied with his work. “It’s not much, but it should last for the next hour or so,” he explained, moving around Logan and lowering himself to the ground as well, facing the other man. “Is it better?”

Logan cracked an eye open, taking in the sight of Patton laying across from him, soft curls drooping into his eyes angelically. The witch couldn’t find it in himself to give a coherent reply. He wasn’t sure if he was actually feeling as good as he thought, or if it was simply euphoria from the lack of pain. Regardless, he had no doubt that even if he were in pain, the sight before him would cure his aching. 

He gave a soft sigh in response to Patton’s question, hoping that would suffice as he shifted to reach for the smaller man. He was suddenly far more tired than he had been a moment before. Patton didn’t hesitate to accept the outstretched hand. The complicated magic having drained him a bit as well. He entwined his  fingers with the witch’s, clinging to the touch. 

“Why don’t you get some sleep, Kiddo,” Patton suggested softly, rubbing his thumb in circles against the back of Logan's hand. “I’ll watch over you.”

“Thank you,” Logan whispered softly, exhaustion lacing his words. He let his eyes close, content to drift off with a small smile on his lips at the knowledge that Patton would be there when his eyes opened again.

Taglist:

@hiddendreamer67 @nightashes @aequinoctiale @sumersnowlilly

[bestillmyslashyheart]

the one left behind

In hindsight, it made sense. Roswell was home, for all of them, but that didn’t mean it was safe. At the time, of course, it felt like one hit after another and Maria wasn’t sure how she would survive. 

Liz was first. Or, more accurately, Rosa was first. Waking up from a decade long coma to the realization that the world thought you were dead and hated you for it would be a shock for anyone. For Rosa, it was the last straw. She’d always been planning to leave, had been trying to leave when Noah-via-Isobel killed her. To her credit, she made it almost two weeks in 2019 before she split, stealing Liz’s car and leaving Roswell in her rearview mirror. 

Maria had barely gotten over the shock of seeing Rosa alive (and learning that aliens were real and had both tried to kill her and revived her) before Liz was hugging her tightly and apologizing profusely. She’d lost her sister once, like hell was she going to do it again. Less than a day after Rosa left, Liz piled her stuff into Max’s car and took off after her. 

The next one surprised her more than she’d thought possible. Rosa Ortecho, alive and well? She could (eventually) wrap her mind around that. Michael Guerin packing up his truck and his Airstream and leaving Roswell? That was somehow harder. Guerin had been her constant. While Liz and Alex had left, Guerin had always been there, ever present and utterly dependable in his own weird way. Maria wasn’t sure she’d ever forget the image of him driving his trailer past the Welcome to Roswell sign. 

He didn’t plan on coming back. He hadn’t actually said those words when he told her was leaving but she didn’t need to be a psychic to see that. Roswell held too many painful memories and not enough good ones. 

With Guerin gone, Maria supposed she shouldn’t have been surprised that Isobel followed not long after. Of course, she said she wasn’t actually following him, something about them each needing to find their own paths, but she didn’t stick around town for long after he was gone. She packed up her house, setting a spectacular bonfire of all of Noah’s things in the process, and sold her house. She gave Maria her phone number and email address in case something alien happened and she needed to get in touch but she didn’t leave a forwarding mailing address. Maria suspected that was because Isobel had no idea where she was going. She was probably going to get in her car and drive until she didn’t see her abusive ex-husband or Max’s ghost around every corner. 

It was a stressful month, to say the least. In 30 days, Maria went from maybe starting a relationship with her best friend’s ex to finding out aliens were real and one of her oldest friends in the world was alive and well after a decade, to losing the people she’d unexpectedly grown closest to. The only ones left in Roswell with her were Kyle Valenti and Alex. And she and Alex weren’t speaking. 

It would have made sense in high school for her and Kyle to be friends. He dated her best friend for almost three years, after all, but they’d never been close. It was strange, being close to 30 and finally getting to see just what it was Liz had seen in that dick of a teenager Kyle had been. He was actually a pretty cool guy, Maria was happy to find out.

It made his departure a month after Isobel’s hurt all the worse. She knew the second he walked into the Pony that night that she wasn’t going to like what he had to say. His aura was shrouded in guilt but also exquisite happiness. Between that and his face, she knew before he opened his mouth that he was leaving, too.

“Where to next, Dr. Valenti?” She plastered a smile on her face as she served him his usual without waiting for him to order.

He glanced at the drink and then her face and smiled crookedly. “Nigeria, first, I think.”

Maria arched an eyebrow in question.

“I was accepted to work with Doctors Without Borders. I need to leave within the week.” As he spoke, he couldn’t quite keep the smile off his face, his lips turning upwards almost against his will and Maria couldn’t help but smile back at him.

“Kyle, that’s awesome.” She reached across the bar to squeeze his hand. “I’m really happy for you.”

“Thanks, Maria.” His smile was bright against the slight gloom in the bar. “I’m sorry to leave you here-”

Maria waved him off. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Always am,” she added cheekily. His smile turned a little sad but she wouldn’t let it drop. “So. Tell me all about it. When did you hear about it?”

She let him prattle on happily about his new job and the next week she gave him a proper send off, on the house. He sent her a lovely worded text very early the next morning that told her he both appreciated and resented the night. In other words, it was perfect.

And then there were two.

It was strange to think that she and Alex had once been as close as siblings. She’d known that kissing Michael would be a mistake but she hadn’t fully understand the ramifications until she’d lost Alex. Oh, he was always friendly and polite when they crossed paths, but the warmth and close friendship they’d once shared was gone. Maria had hope that the one silver lining to finding out everyone had been lying to her for months and then losing them one by one would be that she and Alex could bond again but that hadn’t happened.

In the month following Isobel’s departure, Maria only ever saw him for more than a second when he was with Kyle. They’d come into the Pony some nights and he’d make friendly conversation but he always kept his distance, emotionally speaking. Even his aura was closed off to her. After Kyle left, it was like Alex became a ghost. He didn’t come into the Pony anymore and she never saw him in passing around town. If she hadn’t overheard someone mentioning seeing him in the grocery store, she might’ve thought he’d left to.

But he couldn’t. The one good part about his military service, Maria struggled to think, was that he was obligated to stay in Roswell until he was discharged. 

It was almost two months after Kyle left, over three since Rosa came back to life and everyone fled Roswell like it was on fire, when Maria put on her big girl pants and drove out to Sheriff Valenti’s old hunting cabin. She’d had to ask Kyle where Alex lived and if that wasn’t an indication of how lackluster of an attempt they’d made to reconnect when Alex moved home, she didn’t know what was. Even before Michael came between them, they hadn’t been the friends they once were and Maria missed him.

The truck parked next to the cabin was standing with its doors flung open and the trunk half full of boxes when Maria drove up. She fingered the bottle of tequila in the passenger seat before leaving it there as she got out of the car. 

The front door to the cabin was wide open and she could hear someone moving around inside. Grunts and curses filled the air as Alex came stumbling through the door, a large box in his hands. Maria waited as he shuffled over to his car and added the box to the load.

“Hey,” she greeted softly when his hands were free. Alex tensed but didn’t look to startled so she assumed he’d heard her pull up. “Going somewhere?”

Alex sighed and nodded, turning towards her with a blank expression. “New posting.”

Maria blinked in surprise. “What? You’re being relocated? I thought your service was up?”

“It was,” he admitted slowly. “And then I re-upped. Turns out they don’t need me in Roswell so I have a week to report to my new posting. Which is not in New Mexico.” He turned away and disappeared into the house. Maria followed before she could think better of it.

“You’re leaving?” Maria asked, needing him to say it again for some reason.

“Yes.” 

Maria opened her mouth to say something then closed it again when she realized she didn’t have anything to say. Alex didn’t pause in his movements. He moved slowly but surely through the living room and kitchen, piling the last of his things into boxes and taping them up. 

“Were you going to tell me?” Maria’s voice wavered and she cleared her throat. “Or was I going to find out you were gone too by coming out to an empty cabin?”

Alex chuckled. It wasn’t a pleasant sound. “Why would you be coming out here? I’ve been back over a year and you’ve never come by. Not once. I didn’t even think you knew where I was living, honestly.” Maria looked away, unwilling to admit she’d had to email Kyle for his address. Liz hadn’t known either when she’d asked her. “But yes, I was going to tell you. I was planning to stop by the Wild Pony on my way out of town.”

“Oh. That’s g-,” Maria cleared her throat. “Thank you. I guess.”

“Everyone else is gone,” Alex commented idly as he taped up another box. “Didn’t want to disappear without a word. Just in case you might-” He stopped.

“Might what?” Maria asked. “Worry?” She barked out a harsh laugh. “Do you honestly think I wouldn’t worry if you were gone? Hell, I’ve been worried about you since you left for Basic Training ten years ago. I thought we were coming up on the end of my having to worry about you. But no, you had to go sign up for more!” Alex didn’t turn around and it only stoked her anger. “Why the hell would you go back for more, Alex?”

“Why not?” He didn’t quite shrug. “Being in the military gives me access to the Project Shepherd files and the means to dig deeper.” Maria had to wrack her brain for a moment to remember what Project Shepherd was before remembering the massive government conspiracy into Michael and his family. 

“You’re doing this for Michael.” Maria had meant for it to be a question but it came out a statement. 

Alex paused in his movements. “Partly,” he agreed. “But I’m also doing it to undo every evil thing my family’s ever done. And because I didn’t have any particular reason not to do it.” He straightened up and turned to face her. “Look, why are you here Maria? Is there something you need?”

She stared at him for a beat before shaking her head and shrugging. “I miss you. I miss- I don’t know, I miss my friend. I know things got fucked up between us and I wanted to try and fix that.”

Alex nodded slowly. “Yeah. Things did get fucked. And- and I’d like to fix it too but I don’t think we can. At least not now.”

“So that’s it?” Maria swallowed around the sudden lump in her throat. She’d had breakups hurt less than this.

Alex ran a hand over his hair. “I don’t know, Maria. If I was staying in Roswell I’d say no, of course not, we’d fix it. But I’m leaving. And I don’t know where I’ll be posted next but I can pretty much guarantee it won’t be here.”

Maria nodded. “And after? Where will you go when your service is up? Or will you keep re-upping?”

“I don’t know. You’re asking me something that I probably won’t think about for another four years, at least.”

“Right. Sorry, I guess I don’t know. I guess I’m wondering if this is the last time we’ll ever see each other.” Maria wrapped her arms around her stomach, hugging herself lightly. “I don’t- I don’t want this to be the end of us, Alex. How can- how can we just be out of each other’s lives like this?”

Alex sat down heavily on a chair. “I don’t know, Maria.” Maria was really getting sick of hearing him say that. “I don’t feel like this is something we can fix through a phone. Maybe it’s better to just let it go. Remember the good times we had growing up.”

Maria breathed out through her nose. “I’m really fucking sick of having memories and shit else. I get- I get that Liz had to leave because of Rosa. Hell, I get that Kyle got a job he couldn’t say no to. I get that the Air Force tells you where to go and you can’t argue with that. Hell, I even get why Isobel freaking Evans split town. But what about me? Everyone’s so desperate to leave this town and all its bad memories behind while I’m still here. I’m still here and I get lumped in with the bad memories. And now you want to- to just- pretend we stopped being friends after high school?!” Maria closed her eyes. “I’m really sick of people leaving, Alex.”

Alex didn’t say anything. Eventually, she heard a shuffling sound as he got to his feet and started walking. Maria pressed her eyes closer together so she wouldn’t have to watch him walk out the door and leave her to her tears.

The arms that wrapped around her shoulders were a surprise but Maria didn’t dwell on that. She just sank into Alex’s embrace and buried her face in his shoulder as he hugged her tight.

“Y’know,” Alex began quietly after a while. “You’re not the first to point out I have a history of leaving and not staying in touch.” He paused. “I’m trying this new thing I like to call not being a shitty friend. I’m not great at it, admittedly. But I’m willing to try. If you want to.”

She nodded into his shoulder. “I do. We’re probably going to suck at it. At least at first.”

“Probably,” he agreed. “But we’re quick learners, right?”

“Right.” Her voice sounded firmer than she felt.

Alex left not long after that. Turns out, she’d shown up on his literal last day in Roswell and he couldn’t stick around or he wouldn’t make it to his next posting in time. Maria broke out the tequila and they toasted farewell to the cabin and then she helped him load up the last of his boxes before watching him drive away.

[risottostitties]

Secret Santa!

I’m back from vacation woo!

This is a secret santa thing I participated in with @staruplatinum‘s discord. This is actually for @staruplatinum because I was her secret santa lol. I hope you enjoy it! I tried my best I promise!

Please check the tags before reading

Discovery

It was the third day in a row that Abbacchio had been awoken by the sound of vomiting from the bathroom connected to the room he shared with Nina. While normally such a sound wasn’t new to him, they both enjoyed their alcohol a bit too much if he was being honest, they hadn’t had any the previous night. Or the night before, out of concern that she might be getting sick. So the fact that Nina was waking up in the morning and immediately vomiting immediately put the lilac haired man on edge. What could be causing this? She didn’t feel feverish.

“Have you considered going to a doctor?” He asked, rolling out of bed to gently scoop his girlfriend’s hair out of the way as she heaved. They hadn’t eaten yet, so mercifully this spell of sickness would be brief.

It seemed like she was getting sick more and more often lately. Buccellati had to stop ordering shellfish because the smell made her sick.

“I already considered that, appointment’s this afternoon. I figured that if it was something important I’d tell you after.” Nina admitted, standing on shaky legs and flushing the toilet before going to clean her mouth out.

“Do that.” Abbacchio hummed, watching as she brushed her teeth with an expression softer that what people would expect out of a man like him.

It was hard not to feel soft, not to look at her with such complete adoration. After all, he’d never have anticipated finding himself in such perfect domesticity. It made this bout of illness all the more concerning for him. He hopped to hear nothing but good news from the doctor soon.

 Month 3

Well, as it turns out, it was news alright.

“What do you want to do about this?” The unsure waver in Nina’s voice made his heart clench.

Pregnant.

She was pregnant, and unless there was something else going on it was his. According to the blood work, and the imaging she’d gone in for, she was about twelve weeks in, or approaching the end of the first trimester. There was time, theoretically, to end things before they became a real problem. Kids were never in the picture. In their line of work it was far too dangerous, and what’s more to have him as a father. To come into this world in the shadow of a failure such as himself. To grow up knowing your dad was not only a criminal but a coward and a disgrace as well; wasn’t that just too cruel?

What was he supposed to do? On one hand it would be easier to tell the kid everything from the start, to not allow them to idolize their father and grow up with the false notion that he was a man worthy of their admiration. If they were going to hate him anyway, why would he prolong the inevitable. Was it not cruel to allow the kid to build up a version of him in their head only to have it torn down as soon as they were able to investigate their father’s name?

Of course, this was assuming there would be a child at all.

“We should-“

“I want to keep them.” Nina’s voice prevailed over Abbacchio’s reluctant admission.

It startled him into silence.

“Why would-“ Why was he getting choked up. “It’s a bad idea, with our lives. They’ll be in constant danger.”

“We’re strong enough to protect them. Leone-“ Oh god, there she went. Using his first name. Even after all this time, he still felt his heart skip a beat when she said his name with such a reverent, adoring tone. “I want this. Us. Our family.”

Who was he to say no when she looked up at him like that. Eyes dewy, expression both hopeful and unsure. If he really wanted to, he could probably talk her out of it. But then for a brief second he pictured it. A little boy with her eyes and his nose, chubby and healthy in his mother’s arms. And he wanted it so much, it caused him to ache.

And although he was still wildly unsure… he found himself nodding.

“Our family.” He agreed, closing the distance between them with a quick step and leaning down to capture her lips with his.

He couldn’t tell if the salt he tasted was from her tears of his.

 Month 4

Emotional announcement aside, Abbacchio still had his doubts about the whole pregnancy thing. Morning sickness was killer, and he couldn’t do much to fight off the mounting guilt when he awoke in the morning to his girlfriend hunched over the toilet heaving on an empty stomach. He did this to her after all.

But as though she could read his mind, Nina was always there to reassure him. And soon, he started to warm up to the idea of being a dad. Even as the cravings started to kick in and he found himself up at odd hours of the night, Leone Abbacchio couldn’t remember ever feeling happier. They had decided to keep it their little secret for as long as they could.

Their friends were good people, but they were loud people. And, something about the quiet domesticity the two of them shared together; the beginning of their own little family, something about that was just too nice to give up quite yet.

Although it was only a matter of time before someone found out.

 Month 5

“Nina, did you want any wine with your meal?” Bruno’s good natured question caused the woman to pause, and for Abbacchio to tense up.

“Oh no, no thank you. Not this time.” Her response was just a touch nervous, and Bruno honed in on that like a blood hound. Sometimes his ability to read people was a curse to all of them.

“Is everything alright?” He asked, softly. A question that was quickly overshadowed by Narancia’s boisterous proclamation.

“You haven’t been drinking much either Abbacchio, what gives? Finally going back on the wagon?” The young man adjusted his bandana as he looked up from his homework. “Can’t manage without your little girlfriend?”

The smug smile on the teenager’s face immediately put Abbacchio in a bad mood, but instead of retaliating he simply reached for his glass of water. They had been told to try and reduce stress on Nina as much as possible, it wasn’t good for the baby. And Abbacchio snapping at people did little to relieve stress.

“None of your business.” He settled on that, which only seemed to fuel the fire.

“What, you pregnant or something Abbacchio?” It was meant as a joke obviously, but the silver haired man almost choked on his water; sputtering as he tried to catch his breath.

“Shit man I’m kidding! I didn’t think it’d get you that bad!” Mista was quick to offer his apologies, and a napkin.

“Abbacchio?” Bruno’s soft, but pointed question, left little room for the silverette to worm his way out of things.

Thankfully, Nina stepped in before he could mutter something under his breath.

“They’re due in December.”

And with that, all hell broke loose.

 Month 6

Between the obnoxious ribbing from Narancia and Mista, there was a genuine happiness that filled the small private room in the back of their favorite restaurant. It wouldn’t be easy of course, raising a family in this kind of life. But with an army of over protective uncles it seemed like the kid would have a good start as any.

Nina was starting to really show now, as the doctor had warned them. Once the second trimester reached its end things would progress much faster than they had before. Nina had been removed from active duty because of her condition, something she protested greatly about. But Bruno would be hearing none of it. She had a child to nurture, he chided, she couldn’t be putting her life at risk anymore. Neither of them could. Soon, they would have someone very precious relying on them.

So both Nina and Abbacchio found themselves on ‘light duty’ so to speak. Abbacchio rarely rent on any dangerous jobs anymore. Bruno had taken to using Mista as his back up in Abbacchio’s place. Which, he supposed, was fine. Despite being dense, the gunslinger had a good head on his shoulders, and he was dependable. And, as much as the former police officer and his partner hated being left out of things it certainly wasn’t the case that they had nothing to do.

“I don’t have any fucking idea how this works. This is stupid, they won’t even remember the damned nursery why does it have to be so complicated? Just put them in a fucking box or something and be done with it.” He’d been working at this crib for over an hour now, and frankly Abbacchio was starting to lose his patience.

“Leone. If you imply our child deserves to sleep in a cardboard box in front of me one more time, you’ll be the one sleeping on a box.” Nina sat happily in a rocking chair (the first of many gifts from Godfather Bruno) munching on some plantain chips.

“Do you want to help then?” He asked, pulling back to adjust the bun he’d thrown his hair into.

“Hmm… no. I’m good thanks. I’m busy growing a foot.” Nina’s grin split wider at the exasperated expression on her partner’s face. “Besides, if you really hate the crib we can always co-sleep.”

The crib was finished later that evening.

 Month 7

“So you don’t want to know the gender? Why not? It’d be a pain in the ass to buy all these new clothes if it turned out you had the wrong one.” Narancia asked, watching as Nina opened his gift.

Somehow he’d managed to get a baby onsie emblazoned with ‘All Eyez On Me’ album cover. Very much a little boy outfit. Complete with the sneakers and a hat.

“You fucking moron, this is why I told you to find something gender neutral. I knew I should have bought your present for you.” Fugo grumbled, shoving his present towards Nina next.

“Oh yeah, a strawberry outfit is totally gender neutral. What little boy would be caught dead in that?” Narancia snapped back, and Fugo jumped from his chair. The clattering sound made Nina wince.

“You spoiled my gift before she could open it you cretin! I’m going to end your whole bloodline you filthy fucking-“ And there he went, Fugo was pissed again.

“Oi! If you’re going to fight take it outside!” This, thought Abbacchio, was why they had tried to keep it a secret for so long.

Thankfully though, that seemed enough to stop any further altercations and Fugo muttered an apology before fixing his chair.

“You sound like a dad.” Mista joked, already on his second slice of cake.

“That’s because he is one. Thank you Narancia, Fugo, they’ll love the clothes.” Nina spoke, admiring the cute strawberry printed onsie (and lamenting the fact that it was mostly white, that wouldn’t last long) before putting it carefully with the other gifts.

Mista had given them blankets, five of them (a good number! He claimed) and had even taken the time to show Abbacchio how to swaddle a wine bottle in them. Apparently, Mista was quite good with kids. He never talked much about his former life, but he admitted to having several younger siblings. The ex cop found himself impressed. Although the thought of asking the gunslinger for any help made his stomach coil. Nina on the other hand, seemed to have none of those qualms.

“Mine’s a bit big. I’ll help you get it back to your apartment, but please open it here. I’d like to see what you think.” Bruno spoke up last, offering up a box larger than the others they’d seen before.

“You already bought most of the nursery furniture, Capo. You really didn’t have to get another gift!” It was true, as Nina had said. Bruno had taken it upon himself to furnish the nursery. They should be saving their money, he said, and he wanted to make sure his godchild had appropriate furniture.

“It’s the last one, I promise.” Abbacchio had the feeling it wasn’t the case, but as he helped Nina cut the tape off the box, those thoughts faded.

It was a mobile, with fish and boats and other aquatic creatures carefully hand crafted from wood with sea glass safely secured and dangling from fishing wire. It looked lovingly made and Abbacchio had to do a double take.

It wasn’t until after the party that he had the chance to ask Bruno what the deal was.

“Did you buy that yourself? The mobile. Its beautiful but, you didn’t have to go out of the way for that. The brat won’t remember it anyway.” He asked, taking one last cig break before he and Nina returned to their apartment.

“It was mine.” That gave the taller man pause. “My father held on to it. I found it in the attic a few years ago, and didn’t have the heart to throw it away. I’m happy to know it’ll get good use again. It deserves to be hung up, instead of collecting dust.”

“You should save it for your own kids.” Abbacchio spoke, before taking another drag and offering it to Bruno, who declined with a wave of his hand.

“It’s better put to use now, don’t you think?” Bruno’s expression was far off, and Abbacchio couldn’t read it. So instead of responding is simply shrugged, exhaling his final drag and putting the smoke out with his foot before returning to the restaurant to collect his pregnant partner.

Bruno followed and helped them load everything into the car. The unreadable expression gone from his face.

 Month 8

It was getting close. Braxton Hicks contractions were starting to appear. They had scared the shit out of the two of them the first time it happened. It was far too early and they had panicked, rushing to the hospital despite having been told what to expect this late into the pregnancy.

Nervous energy was abound between the two of them. Nina was officially on bedrest. She had been getting weaker and the doctors erred on the side of caution. There was little to worry about, they assured, they just decided to be safer rather than sorry. Leone couldn’t disagree with that, although he was glad that the whole pregnancy thing was almost done. Nina looked like she would kill someone if she had to remain cooped up in their bedroom for too much longer.

It was late, and while Leone had stopped drinking in solidarity with Nina he couldn’t help but want a sip to calm his nerves. Instead though, he walked around the apartment (trying to mind his feet so he didn’t wake his sleeping partner, the pregnancy made her a light sleeper) and took stock of their little home. Their life together.

It was new, better than the one bedroom they’d shared. Bruno helped them get into a neighborhood with a good school. Their rent was affordable, and their neighbors were friendly. IT was all so domestic, it felt like a dream. Or a cruel prank. He half expected to wake up on the couch hungover but that had yet to happen.

He paused, looking into the nursery. Bruno’s mobile was strung up over the crib. The room was simple, white furniture with light blue walls. With the mobile they added a few more ‘nautical’ things into the décor. Striped sheets in the cribs, some bubble decals on the wall, but over all it was a simple and calming room. The shelves were lined with books and blocks and other baby toys, and the stuffed animals they had been gifted were safely tucked away out of the crib. In less than a month there would be someone living here.

Leone took a seat in the rocking chair and observed, not even noticing as he nodded off to sleep.

In the morning he awoke with a blanket covering him, and he got up. Nina had no business being on her feet covering up her idiot partner. Ah, partner. That needed to change soon. Husband sounded better. But that was for later. Once the kid was born, then Abbacchio could worry about making his girlfriend his wife. Some would say it was out of order.

Abbacchio hoped to encounter them one day so they could say it to his face. See how well that worked out for them.

 Month 9

How did it come to this? How had he allowed it to come to this? Abbacchio knew the kind of man he was, the kind who took the cowards way out of things. The kind who would rather turn to underhanded bribes than admit the futility of his work. The kind of man who allowed an innocent man to die for his mistakes. The kind of man who fucked up everything he touched. It only stood to reason that someday, eventually, he would ruin this as well.

He should have put an end to this when the problem first reared its head. Instead here he was, taking a drag from a rancid cig he bummed off a nurse to try and take the edge off of things. It was snowing, almost Christmas. This would have been their first Christmas.

Everything was wrong.

It all happened so fast. Things were going fine, labor was long but not unnaturally so. It was about five hours in when the baby’s heart beat started dropping. Emergency c-section. She seemed fine. The baby came, a girl, shockingly enough. And then Nina started slurring her words. It all happened so fast, he was being rushed out of the room by a nurse and the last thing he heard was the slowing of a heart monitor.

Twenty minutes later a doctor came to offer his apologies, and a child. Abbacchio had turned and left then, unable to handle the weight of what just happened. Shoving past Bruno (the only one allowed to be there for the birth) he ran from the hospital; coward that he was. And here he found himself, smoking to try and… what? Numb something? He was already numb. The cold helped with that. Perhaps if he stayed out here long enough, he’d risk hypothermia. He’d be doing everyone a favor right, freezing to death outside the hospital. It was abundantly clear to Abbacchio that he ruined every good thing that had the misfortune of encountering him.

Perhaps it would be best if he vanished from this kid’s life before he had the chance to infect that too. Or perhaps he’d doomed the kid of a life full of hardship by virtue of being the son of a bitch that fathered it. Her. It was a her. They had a name picked out. It was-

“Are you going to keep the name Sophia?” The only person capable of piercing through Abbacchio’s haze of self-depreciation had come outside to meet him.

How Bruno managed to get the baby out of the hospital so soon after it was born, who knows. Or perhaps he just became numb to the passage of time along with the cold. How long had it been already? Who knows? Who cared. But there she was, bundled up tightly in her hospital blankets and Bruno’s own coat for good measure.

“I’m not keeping anything.” Abbacchio huffed a long drag from his cigarette, having the decency to at least blow away from his friend and the child he held.

“Leone.”

“Bruno.”

His friend’s normally gentle face was furrowed into an expression of distaste. Always so righteous, of course Bruno would take issue with his decision. He still clung to the belief that Abbacchio was worth something, a dangerous notion considering that now there was a child in the mix. Bruno was a smart man, but perhaps their friendship had blinded him to the reality of the situation-

“She loved you and Sophia very much, you of all people should know that.” Bruno tried, only for Leone to take another drag from the smoke.

“A horrible choice on her part.”

“Leone.”

“What, Bruno? What do you want?” That was it, Bruno had found Leone’s breaking point and fuck, if he wanted a reaction out of him so bad, he had it. “Do you want me to be on my knees bawling in the hospital room? Should I be clinging to her hand, shaking her body, begging for her to wake up? What kind of reaction would please you Bruno?”

He threw the cigarette down and stomped it into the slush.

“What am I supposed to do?” Abbacchio could hear his voice crack, knees hitting the cold snow as his legs gave out.

It was amazing, how quickly rage could turn to sadness. Nina had borne witness plenty of times, as had Bruno. This was nothing new for either man, but there was a certain weight to it now. Nina was gone. She wasn’t coming back. If she were here she would be on her knees with him. She’d hold him close, let him scream into her shoulder and cling to her hard enough to bruise (something he always felt horrible for after). And in the end, she’d be there to fix his makeup. Sometimes they’d both need to touch things up; she wound up crying with him.

He’d have her sit on the bathroom counter as he fixed the delicate wing of her eyeliner. They’d tease each other over their puffy eyes and still runny nose. It was like a ritual between them almost, doing each other’s makeup. It wouldn’t happen again though, and the realization washed over him like a cold wave. He missed the numbness then, as he choked out an undignified sob. It was so much easier to be numb.

“Leone.” He could hear the crunch of slushy snow in front of him as Bruno knelt, careful not to jostle the child too much. She was already getting fussy from her father’s loud outburst. “I can’t help you. You need to help yourself. But I can be there for you, and for Sophia.”

“I’ll fuck that up too.” Abbacchio managed, unable to lift his eyes from the ground to look at the child beginning to fuss in Bruno’s arms. She already hated him it seemed. The sound of his voice was enough to make her squirm in discontent. He couldn’t blame Sophia.

“Sophia doesn’t seem to think so.” Bruno’s soothing voice did little to calm the infant, but it began to work on Abbacchio. The tears had yet to dry, but a feeble hiccup signaled the end of his sobbing.

“She’s trying to get away from me.” As if on cue the baby squirmed more, turning her head from her father.

“I think she’s just scared.” Bruno corrected, shifting the baby in his arms. “Leone, try holding her.”

“What?” That caused Leone to snap to attention. “You can’t be serious.”

He had very little time to react though, as Bruno deposited the infant into his arms. Abbacchio had to fumble a bit to support the head, but once things were in order it felt almost… natural.

He stood then, trying to dry what wsa left of his tears off on his shoulder. The kid looked kinda like both parents. She had some wispy pale hairs. Were those from him? Or would she grow dark hair like her mother? Sophia was still fussy, a spirited little thing it seemed, and although her eyes were mostly shut against the cold he could see the tiniest little sliver of purple and gold. She had his eyes.

She had. His eyes.

It was a simple realization, nothing remarkable. It didn’t do anything to quell the ache growing more and more apparent in the place in his heart Nina had occupied. It didn’t lead to any grand epiphany of how he was going to handle the future without her at his side. Nina had been his rock, his confidant, the person he loved most in the world and the one person capable of making Abbacchio see through the haze of self-loathing to imagine a better future. And she was gone. There was nothing that could replace her, and he didn’t want anything to replace her. If he hurt, it meant that she had been there once, right? The fact that her passing left such gaping hole was proof, in its own way, that she had really loved him. And that he, the failure Leone Abbacchio, had been capable to returning that love. Worthy of accepting that love.

And the physical proof was here in his arms. A mixture of Nina and himself. A gift that she had lavished so much time and love on, and had worked so hard to bring into the world. And what a job she did. Sophia was healthy, and energetic if the way she squirmed was any indication. Nina would have been so proud, so happy to have been her mother. Sophia couldn’t replace Nina. She couldn’t do anything to fill the voice her mother left behind. But it was strange, there was a new spot now. A new hole, but instead of emptiness it overflowed. He had to take a shaky breath to try and steady himself. It was overwhelming, the feelings of grief and loss and love mixing together. He could feel himself crying again, although for a new reason.

“Leone?” Bruno asked, having gotten up out of the slush himself.

“I’ll try.” It was all Abbacchio could manage as he again used his shoulders to try and dry his face. It was enough though, and as the new father began to bounce his daughter to try and soothe her, the two men headed back into the hospital together.