#Queer Stuff in Old Media No One Talks About

[tokyogirl07]

Two lesbian moms and their son in Granada’s The Return of Sherlock Holmes, the third season of 1984’s The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (AKA The Slashiest Adaptation). They hold on these three for, like, 4 seconds before returning to Holmes and Watson. The neighbourhood they’re in is an expensive one, home to a politician, and these ladies look to be fairly well to do. That might explain it.

Seriously though, mid-80’s. No one caught this until the past decade?!

[darcylindbergh]

I’m a queer minor with an unsupportive Republican family and I feel so fucking helpless about the election. What can I do or at least how can I stay safe?

listen to me. i am taking your face in my hands. i am looking into your eyes. listen. your second question is the right one. your safety is your priority. have you ever been on a plane? and they do the little safety routine? and when the masks fall down, they say, "put your own oxygen mask on before helping others?"

as a queer kid, this is a put your own mask on before helping others situation.

there are things you can do to get involved but first and foremost, you gotta be safe. if that means you don't come out and you don't talk about politics and you don't get involved in activism until you can be independent, that's what it means. i know it sucks to hear. it really sucks saying it, tbh. i want you to be big and out and loud and proud, and i never want you to have to make yourself small, but more than anything i want you to be safe.

so everything i'm about to say is with this caveat. safety first. your own mask before helping others.

here's a link to the lgbt national youth talkline. this service won't call outside agencies (like 911) on your behalf, unless you're making a credible threat to someone else.

the Trevor Project also has a hotline and chat services. they do call outside agencies on your behalf to report imminent harm to yourself or others as well as reporting child abuse. i'm not saying one is better than the other. i just want you to know what each service does.

the Trevor Project also has trevorspace, which i guess is like social media for lgbt youth? i am not a youth so i didn't sign up to check it out but it could be a good place to find folks to talk and connect with. connections are so good.

here's some things you can do. i tried to include a bunch of things with different amounts of involvement so you can pick your safety level.

read. read so much. read about people who are like you and who are not like you. read fiction that celebrates queer joy and read nonfiction books about antiracism and intersectionality and the history of queer people in the US. do you know who has a cool amount of information on queer history in the US? the national park service. watch queer movies, even (especially, tbh) old ~problematic stuff, look up what people say about it now. read through the articles on decolonizepalestine.com. watch interviews about Black joy. know your rights. read banned books. if you can't do, learn. read. just because it's happening inside your head doesn't mean it's real work.

check out scarleteen, which is a fantastic resource for queer sex ed and relationship information. a lot of their articles are older now, but still 100% great reads.

watch what your family is watching - debates, news stories, whatever - and ask yourself how would i respond to that? look up how to respond to that. you can use this time to start learning how to dissect political speech and how to respond to it. both sides do this! read news from both sides and see how it compares.

make your daily 5 calls. they give you scripts and everything. if you don't want to talk to a real human person, calling in the evening will usually get you a voicemail. talking on the phone is a hugely important social skill - if you don't have it, the 5 calls are a great way to start and to start addressing your discomfort with phones.

20 states allow 17-year-olds to vote in the primaries.

Pre-register to vote if you're eligible.

Vote Forward puts on a letter writing campaign you can participate in.

NextGen America has in-person volunteer opportunities in 8 states, and virtual opportunities globally. Although they target voters 18-35, volunteers can be any age. (hey adults - you listening?)

here's even more information on phone or text banking! for most of these, you don't have to be 18.

Organize a voter registration drive at your high school. the Civics Center has a free, one-hour online workshop that will walk you through how to host a drive and they'll even send you swag for it. check out their "for students" tab - they have sharable graphics, workshops, lots of stuff.

in some states, people under 18 can sign up to be poll workers. (hey adults - we can do this too)

CIRCLE is a civic engagement center that focuses on getting youth out to vote, but also educating folks. check their website out. listen. politics are so boring like, 99.9% of the time. the more you know about how it works, the more effective you can be when you want to get involved.

look up your local political body, find out when they meet. attend the meetings. in my county we have a board of commissioners that meet once a month, and a couple of committees as well. i don't go every time but now that i can log into the meetings via Zoom, I do about every other month or so. did you see that video of violet affleck speaking at the LA board of supervisors meeting? that could be you, babe.

so there's a lot you can do actually! here's some more stuff you can do!!

know, with 100% certainty, in your heart of hearts, that there are so many people who want you to be out and proud and loud and yourself. and there are so many people who are fighting for you to be able to do that. there are so many adults, queer and non-queer, rooting for you, standing up for you, putting ourselves between you and a future where you have to keep making yourself small. and you will get older and i know it's trite but THINGS REALLY DO GET BETTER, and someday you will be the queer adult on this side of the screen protecting kids like you. you gotta keep on keeping on and keeping yourself safe so you can do that someday.

log off. LOG OFF. doomscrolling is a form of self-harm. deliberately seeking out endless articles and tiktoks and whatever about news and information that will upset you is not activism, babe! it's harm! you aren't helping anyone by being hurt. there's a difference between being informed and hurting yourself. find the line. hold yourself to it.

stop using chat gpt. it's terrible. forget you ever knew about it. that's not related to activism its just like, general health, and also climate change. while i'm here, switch to firefox and duckduckgo.

go outside. it turns out touching grass is actually important for our mental health. go find some.

pick up a hobby that does something with your hands, if you're able to. i cross-stitch and play piano (badly). pick up drawing. cooking. embroidery. underwater basket weaving. it's important to find something that shows you what YOU can do with YOUR two hands. you can do so much.

find your people. online, in person. find your people. when i got this ask, i - not a parent - threw it to my people and they helped me find some resources. we're doing this together.

this is kind of silly but i love doing it. find the marriage license announcements in your county or township or whatever and look for gay people. you'll be guessing by names, so watch out - we love trans people who have and haven't made the legal name change! - but GOD. i've looked at the marriage license announcements literally every two weeks (which is how often they're published in my county) since Obergefell v Hodges 9 years ago, which is when we got gay marriage in my state, and it's so fucking healing. in the last 9 years, i have seen hundreds of gay people make this announcement. every two weeks, there are four or five gay couples in my community out of maybe 15, 20 (i live in a pretty small county). look up why marriage rights have mattered so much to our community. these marriage license announcements are just such a small, bright spot of joy and seeing the names - real people! in my real community! - cradles my heart. find what cradles your heart.

this has gotten long enough so i'm going to set it free. i'm sure there will be people in the notes adding things. for you parents out there, leave your love in the comments. for the rest of us extremely cool and suave adults, pick something off the list and volunteer too, and look at this anon and think yes, this is why we do it. kids like us who are kids now, who will be us later. for you Youth out there, put your oxygen mask on first and then help others.

i love you.

it gets better.

[dnpbeats]

drop the dan loving goblin phil essay rn

(in reference to my tag on this post)

OKAY SO! In BIG dan says this about phil: "And this is when, through the magic of the internet, I met Phil. And obviously we were more than friends but it was more than just romantic. This is someone that genuinely liked me. I trusted them. And for the first time since I was a tiny child, I actually felt safe. [...] Especially to anyone that has experienced the kind of self-hatred that I have dealt with, one person accepting you can make all the difference" (ty @goldenpinof for the transcript 🕺). Now obviously, this is in the context of dan being gay so for the most part he's referencing his sexuality here when he talks about being accepted, and I am not trying to undermine that at all. But I think that phil's acceptance of dan went deeper than just his sexuality (goblin Phil comes into this I promise lol).

dan also talks a bit in BIG about how he was nerdy and was bullied for that before he was bullied for being gay. He's also mentioned other times how being nerdy/geeky didn't use to be accepted. In the 4/13 stereo show, dan says: "Before YouTube, if you were a nerd, you felt like you weren't a valid member of society unless you were, like, captain of the football team or whatever. [...] Now, thanks to social media, it's like 'oh, okay, well if someone like Hank Green can exist, I'm fine.'" What's extra interesting about this example specifically is that dan is talking about representation in response to a fan prompting him to talk about queer representation in media. So like, yes the majority of dan's struggles in accepting himself were surrounding his sexuality, but I do also think there was a layer of being a nerdy kid at a time when it wasn't cool or fun that added onto him not accepting himself. And I do not think that that's completely separate from his nonacceptance of his sexuality.

So, what exactly does this have to do with dan expecting phil to be super debonair and then having those expectations shattered? But then still wanting phil, arguably even more than he did before? Well, I think that phil was (and is) unapologetically himself, and that was inspiring for dan to see. dan said in BIG that he didn't meet an out gay person until he was 18, so either that person was phil himself or he met phil shortly afterwards and phil was therefore one of the first out gay people dan knew. and we know from phil's coming out video that he wasn't ashamed of his sexuality at that time. but phil's acceptance of himself goes beyond his sexuality, like just look at his YouTube content at the time. he was doing experimental stuff that was weird as shit (I don't mean that in a bad way I like his old vids!). most people probably would not have the confidence or self-assurance to make the stuff he was making, let alone post it. and then, beyond that, he was just a nerdy guy himself! but it was something that he openly talked about online and we know he and dan bonded over video games/tv shows/etc.

And now let's think about this from dan's perspective. He's been watching this guy's videos forever. He's been talking to him online for the past couple of months, and while he was talking with phil (rather than "amazingphil"), I'm sure there was still that element of like "wow holy shit I can't believe I'm talking with amazingphil!" Hence why dan says in the mean girls video that he was expecting phil to be all "hi, I'm amazingphil! 😏" when they first met (also side note, when dan starts to make this joke phil starts doing it at the same time, so I'm sure this is a discussion they've had before lol). but Phil wasn't like that!!! he was all hunched over and awkward and dorky! because he was nervous!! BUT he wasn't ashamed of that. he wasn't trying to put on some AmazingPhil™ Smooth Operator Refined front. He was just himself. Unapologetically so. And for dan, I think that that meant so much in terms of accepting himself, but also feeling accepted. because how was he going to believe phil when he said "dan I love you for who you are" if phil was hiding himself around dan?

So yeah, I think that's why dan saw goblin phil, not amazingphil, and was still like "yeah I want to build my life with this person." Because for him, phil represented self-acceptance and being accepted and a safe place and someone who he could be on the same wavelength with and true unconditional love and someone he can geek out with and someone who will let him yap for an hour about whatever the hell dan has decided to talk about that day. of course he would like phil more than whatever version of amazingphil he had built up in his head. because phil loves dan for who he truly is and dan loves phil for who he truly is :)

[rexecutioner]

If you want a way to introduce MyStreet to your friends, or want to rewatch it but don’t remember the lore as well as you would like…boy have I got some news for you.

Let me introduce you to Dubbing Over All Of MyStreet!!!

Talking from experience, dubbing over Aphmau videos is fucking hilarious if you keep bits going and all have a pretty good sense of humor.

Me, my best friend, and my (twin) sister all sat down one day a few months ago and, without remembering any of the lore, (we were MyStreet kids) dubbed over Emerald Secret and we had a blast.

Forever Potions? WRONG. Aphmau, Zane and Lucinda get possessed by Andrew Tate and two of the founding fathers instead.

Aaron being the son of Derek Lycan? LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER. Andrew “Derek” Tate. Aaron Lycan-Tate. Melissa Tate. And Just Pearly Things Tate, don’t ask me about that one.

Ein handing Aphmau the knife to kill Aaron? SO CLOSE! Ein and Aaron having romantic tension confessing their love to each other as Andrew Tate possessing Aphmau walks over to Ein, demanding his knife, and Ein accidentally drops it, exclaiming “Oh, darn my butterfingers!”

Kim gets possessed by Emmalyn? NOPE. Kim gets possessed by “The Ghost of Bisexuality’s Past” and one half of her brain is gushing over Zendaya and Audrey Plaza while the other is screaming about Josh Hutcherson and young Matt Dillon.

Aaron lore taking over a third of the season? NOT ANYMORE. Aaron character growth as he learns from Kim and Lucinda that all women deserve rights and misogyny is bad, while Aphmau and Zane have a side plot about how manipulating your best friend into turning people into dogs and telling her you are her conscience is bad.

Strictly Aarmau? WRONG AGAIN. Crackships like Aarein come into play, while more fandom loved ones like Garrance, Danvis and Katecinda are thrown around. Along with some canon ships like Travlyn and Zana, while including with some weird “we forgot the plot and who these characters are bcs they only show up in this season” ships that will not be named here.

And that’s just Emerald Secret, we dubbed over Love Love Paradise (halfway done), Lover’s Lane (one third), When Angels Fall (first few episodes we had two other friends join us!), Pheonix Drop High S2, A Royal Tale, and a few Cocomau videos as well.

We have made so many inside jokes while dubbing My Street. I didn’t even get to the Time Travel Trio, Aphmau stealing people’s souls, Not Alone Buddies inner consciousness mind links, Ivan’s lisp, Weed Crystals, Milf Manor, Aphmau’s queer awakening, the emeralds actually telling secrets, Tatiana being named “Thanks for Watching”, Aarmau break up (forever), Liochant and Michi’s drug ring, and so much more.

You don’t have to be good at voice acting or know the plot, you just have to know the character’s names and a loose understanding of improv, and you’ll be set.

Just a fair warning, if you plan to dub over a piece of media you like, make sure you don’t remember the plot as well as you’d like to, or else your brain might just fill in random stuff with lore that is already canon, which is why the second half of our Angel’s Fall dub kinda fell off because at that point all three of us knew the plot. Have fun with it! Don’t feel pressured to make it close to canon at all.

I even made fanart for it. Heads up, this art is old and the style is outdated. I don’t draw like this anymore.

[fubblers]

[Transcript in Alt Text]

Sharing this quick NYT article because I think a lot of people struggle to find community these days. Not all of us have a third space which means you have to do the labor of finding or creating a third space.

I saw a post recently that talked about how Small Talk may be boring and shallow, but it’s a step toward Big Talk. I use small talk as a way to signal to people “hi I’m friendly and I want to get to know you better!”

Just as this article indicates, there are places where you can practice small talk.

Additionally, there’s probably spaces around you that you didn’t know about if you live in a city. I know small towns aren’t always going to have a wealth of queer leftist spaces, but it’s worth looking around.

Instagram sucks but it’s the way like 90% of 15-35 year olds seem to network with each other nowadays. I made an Instagram out of necessity because it’s how I got plugged into a bunch of communities. A lot of cool community events only advertise on Instagram and literally no where else. There might be a club for your special interest 20 minutes away from you that you would never know about because no one has a dang website anymore.

There’s also always the good old library! I joined a zine club at one of my local libraries and it’s been really refreshing. It’s mostly kids that attend but I’ve brought some adult friends along and I’m really getting to know the librarian that runs it. In fact, the zinester that runs it connected with me on Instagram and I found out we have a lot of political beliefs in common and I expect to become friends!

This is the part where I advertise zines as well. Once you start joining these groups you should make zines lol. Look up how to make a one page mini zine and put stuff in it that your circle would be interested. If it’s a model train club, write about the history of model trains and pass it out to your buds! If it’s a public speaking class, summarize some of the tips you’ve learned and pass it out as a sort of cheat sheet to the other students! You can hand write it and just copy it at the library!

Then you literally just put your social media handle, email, phone number, whatever, on the back! People can start connecting with you! Then after your class or club is over you might get a message like “hey let’s grab coffee!”

I’m not kidding at all! Go to your local game stores yugioh tournament and pass out your mini booklet about yugioh strategies!!

It gives people a great starting point to talk to you. And you might have people walk over and say “hey are you passing those out? Can I have one? I’m [name] by the way.” And congrats you’ve started step one of making a friend.

[dyketennant]

FAGS IN ARMS OF TUMBLR

i need some examples of visual media (specifically film, television, video games) that has immortal characters who have a fucky relationship with gender/sexuality. at the moment i'm specifically looking at characters that have always been immortal, such as doctor who (functionally immortal for the sake of this paper) and good omens/sandman (unsure how gaim-y i want this paper to be but this at least gives you an idea of the types of characters i'm interested in.) aliens, gods/fantastical or mythological beings, robots/androids (THIS ONE ESPECIALLY I'VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND MORE ON)

however, i am not opposed to hearing about media in which characters are made immortal somehow—thinkin bout the old guard especially here, and also interview with the vampire has been banging down my door recently, but there are so fucking many gay vampires and i don't need to make this capstone project any longer/more complicated, hence my apprehension to open that particular can of worms and have said worms consume my entire body. i'll even take stuff about time travelers tbh (trust me when i say that if i could talk about this is how you lose the time war for this paper i would have already done it 20 times over, but that book takes more time to take apart and analyze in the way it deserves, and also is not in the realm of film/media i'm focusing on.)

don't talk to me just about greek and norse mythology, etc. believe me, i know. again, a can of worms i can't dwell on for too long for the sake of me and my advisor's sanity.

thank you queers stay strong stay sexy o7

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/749218521745145857/while-i-love-some-queergay-whatever

“Kissing on the forehead isn’t necessarily romantic” makes sense if we are talking about a work of media that is made in a time/place where that was a common thing between same gender platonic friends.

But are you, anon? Or are you talking about like, a piece of Western mass media from the past 50 years? Or are you talking about anime — because if anything, kissing is even more loaded in Japan than it is in the West, especially if there are other people around. (Lots of people in anime fandom love to use “but Japanese culture” arguments to no homo, but are banking on no one reading them actually knowing jack shit about Japanese culture — because it’s almost never true or based on any real Japanese cultural difference, there’s just making shit up. It assumes people will take for granted anything that frames Japan as “foreign and inscrutable and impossible for Westerners to understand” which is just Orientalism tbqh)

Just saying, because I almost never see this shit said about like, a novel from 1820 or something from a culture like, say, some Middle Eastern countries where men kissing other men platonically is a thing…. and almost always see it said about current media from a culture where kissing on the forehead would be seen as something you’d likely not do to a platonic friend of the same gender.

You can’t “impose your cultural norms” on something from the same culture as you lol, or something from another culture that has the same norm! And an (for example) American assuming that modern American media plays by the rules of modern American culture and seeing it through that lens, doesn’t necessarily mean that American is unaware that different norms exist in different cultures. But like… it just makes sense to analyze a current American show for American audiences set in America in the modern day through the cultural standards of 2020s America and not, say, Bangladesh or Namibia or 1850s America.

And on another note, if you were as much of a fan of “queer readings” as you claim to be, you’d know that they often have little to do with authorial intent. In fact, it’s often specifically about reclaiming media that didn’t have you in mind as the audience.

(Seriously, I really doubt you have read many of those queer readings, bc if this bothers you so much, the stuff queer studies academics and cultural critics see as “gay subtext” in old Hollywood movies — hell, the stuff that gay, bi and sympathetic-straight directors and actors and writers often very much INTENDED as gay subtext in those movies — would make your brain explode.)

Anyway, we’ve all been in fandoms where there’s a ship some people insist has a ton of subtext but it’s just two guys sharing a scene occasionally and they just WANT to believe it’s there when it isn’t, and it can be annoying sure if there are so many people insisting this that it’s inescapable and becoming fanon that affects the fic about the ships you like, or if they’re pushy and sanctimonious about it. (My current fandom has a group of people who insist the only reason other people don’t see all the “subtext” for their random rarepair is racism or something, and then ignore how much textual stuff they have to deliberately leave out or misinterpret for their reading to “work” lol. Like scenes where their starry eyed expression is directed at a different character and that’s obvious in the actual episode but not in their selectively edited gif set or meta post.) But that is not the same as doing that with KISSING ON THE FOREHEAD ffs. And also, let’s not pretend that slash (or femslash) shippers are the worst offenders, like het shippers — and the broader culture — doesn’t constantly treat “a man and a woman interact” as meaning “they could/should be a couple,”

If you’re not bothered by that, but you’re bothered by when people do it with two men or two women… yeah you gotta ask yourself why that is. I have an idea why, and it’s not bc of your greater cultural open mindedness lol

--

[tjalexandernyc]

As every major social media platform crumbles around us in their rush to enshittify faster I'd like to (selfishly) ask you to support your favorite artists and writers by signing up for their fucking newsletter.

I know it's old-fashioned. I know e-mail is not cool or fun. I know that signing up for a newsletter is a bigger lift than clicking a Follow button. I know a lot of newsletter content you will receive may not be interesting or useful or well-designed. (But not every tweet or insta story or tumblr post is gonna be, either.)

Artists and writers need your buy-in on this ESPECIALLY queer and PoC who face an even worse uphill battle on these platforms. Forget the harassment (although that part sucks too) it's almost impossible for me to actually talk to my followers on a lot of places because the stuff I post about--trans people and books about them--get hidden by that algo. Why should I waste my time making Content that even people who follow me probably won't see unless I spend money I don't have on ads? Content that btw will be sold to AI scrapers so they can "learn" from me without giving me anything in return.

My point is, online spaces are no longer serving the purpose of connecting people. They are not forever. All it takes is one shitty business decision (or a wild series of them) to turn a social media platform into a ghost town. It's frustrating to invest a lot of time and energy into these things and then POOF the following you worked so hard to amass is in the wind.

so here's my newsletter if you're interested. It's about my trans and nonbinary romance novels. I send it like once a month. I try to keep it short and sweet, just updates about my books and recs for books I liked. It's really the only solid way to keep track of me because every day I am more convinced that stepping back from social media is better for me personally and professionally.

If you truly care about supporting people doing creative things, please please please sign up for whatever individual update system they use, which is probably a newsletter.

[evasiveagaric]

I have a physical reaction every time i think about the queercoding of Dave at the end of homestuck. My roommate and I were reading it and i kept having to take a moment to think “holy shit, is he coming out??? is that what we missed on the meteor round 2?”. I don’t keep up with Andrew Hussie news bc i don’t really like him as a person, but the whole talk with Egbert on the lillypad makes me think Hussie either was really close to a queer person or queer himself with just how accurately he wrote Dave talking about the queer experience, even if he doesn’t actually come out in that part. It doesn’t feel like queerbaiting either bc it bc fits with Dave’s characterization and how hard it is for him to talk about anything sincerely.

I don’t want to downplay the importance of Dave realizing the thoughts Bro instilled in him about how a man should act in favor of speculating about his sexuality tho. Not wanting to be a stoic hero of man who doesn’t have attachments or be soft with anyone is a huge part of Dave’s characterization and character arc. I think they go hand in hand tho, his struggles with toxic masculinity and his sexuality. I think the conversation was blatantly about both while Dave gave himself an out to pretend it was just about one. And he didn’t even do that.

I’m about to get hella pretentious and read way too much into things under the cut. More rambling about Dave’s character arc as a whole and nitpicking of dialogue towards the end of homestuck down below.

Future peepaw edit: this turned into a fucking play by play essay, my bad

Out of order but I also want to talk about his characterization as a whole.

Homestuck Mobile formatting jumpscare:

He’s willing to talk about another guy’s feelings. Romantic ones. for someone at the time presents as a guy. It doesn’t even feel like he’s joking. 13 year old Dave would never.

And this happens before all the stuff i mentioned earlier, showing exactly what he talked about. I honestly don’t think any other character has an arc like Dave’s. Which, seeing as Dave is a fully fleshed out complex character that makes sense, but I mean in general. I have consumed a lot of media, i’ve consumed a lot of queer media too. I’m really into the history of queercoding and how it relates to representation. I don’t think I’ve seen a character arc quite like Dave’s, especially in relation to sexuality and toxic masculinity.

Egbert assumes that Dave’s being a dick on purpose, and Dave rebukes it so strongly he uses an exclamation point. In a series where how people type is kind of a big thing, Dave’s frequent lack of punctuation is a nod to his “cool guy” facade, the lack of tone indication part of the “mystery” a cool guy has to be surrounded with. So, the fact that he feels strongly enough, or has loosened up enough on the cool guy show no emotions routine speaks to his self reflection. Of course this is stated literally a few more dialogue lines down, about how much time he spent on the meteor thinking about societal norms and his Bro’s teachings but the fact that it’s sprinkled in before hand too makes it feel less like it’s come out of the blue, or that it’s out of character.

“yeah we coulda talked about this” says so much. Not only to his relationship with Karkat (romantic or not, i’m a Davekat shipper but that’s not what i’m getting at here) but just how far he’s come with getting close to others. Not to mention the fact that it’s implied that they talk at least somewhat frequently about heavy and deep issues such as feelings for other people definitely feels like a major shift in Dave’s character, one for the better.

He’s probably been vulnerable with Karkat in a way that he never was with anyone as a kid. They talk about things. They talk about important enough things that Karkat’s past black crush on Egbert never coming up probably feels a little strange, hence Dave asking if he’s been thinking about it all this time. He has that connection with Karkat, which is important bc Karkat is masculine presenting. I’d bet money that Bro would not have approved, regardless of them just being friends or not.

That level of vulnerability? Not immediately calling Karkat gay and dunking on him? Treating what would be seen a gay relationship as completely normal and not even something to bat an eye at? 13 year old Dave WISHES he had the emotional maturity Dave has now.

He even encourages Karkat to hold on to those feelings bc Egbert expressed that they could hate people, at least platonically. Egbert even calls him out, saying he sounds like he’s being a dick about it and Dave says he’s being real.

Not to mention he kind of forgets that Egbert “isn’t a homosexual” at this point, that or he suspects Egbert isn’t straight in some capacity. I think he has less hang ups about queerness than Karkat does at this point. Or at least less hang ups about being honest. It feels fitting for his character and i’m sad that most of that character arc is off screen. I get it tho, writing meteorstuck round 2 would have made homestuck significantly longer most likely.

In conclusion: I like Dave and his character arc too damn much. I have to go to work now, i was not expecting to have this many thoughts about it and i’ve rambled enough.

[skepsiss]

Modern Problem, Modern Solution pt3

Steddie fic, this is the 3rd part of the mini-series (I guess?) that I'm writing. This is the one where Eddie pretends to be a vampire for fun. More just Eddie being awkward as all hell and teens being teens. The next part (pt4) has the conflict so hang in there angst lovers.

PT1 PT2 PT4

--

Eddie chewed his nails as he stood outside the classroom in the mostly empty hallway at school. It was 3:30 and he was debating if he wanted to risk stepping into the club room or not. So, he chewed and chewed on his nail until he bit the top off and then spat it into the nearby bin, not paying attention to whether or not it made it in.

The door before him was decorated with rainbow paper that blocked the little window to see into the classroom. It was an old craft that had obviously been there for too long judging from the faded quality of the coloured parchment. It was Mrs. Goodwin's classroom, but that wasn't why Eddie was there, she just happened to be the "support staff" that advocated for the LGBT-Alliance club. Every club needed an "advocate" even if the teacher didn't participate in anything related to the club after it was made. Hellfire's club was "officially" endorsed by the school's drama teacher, Mr. Lobuskwits, but Eddie could count on one hand how many times he had actually spoken to the guy.

No, Eddie was here–and currently stressing out over whether or not he wanted to take the last 3 steps to walk into the club room–because he was trying to decide if he wanted to join in today. He had been thinking about it for a week or more now and he hated _why_ it had been on his mind. He hadn't a real interest in the club activities, but a part of him felt drawn to supporting some of the members–okay, well, maybe just one of the members. He had convinced himself that he felt bad for Steve being the oldest boy in the club with no one else to really relate to. He seemed to get along fine with Robin–Steve also had sports and Eddie seemed to remember he was part of the Key Club or something–but there was something different about getting to know someone close to your age that also happened to have similar lived experiences.

Who was he kidding? He and Steve lived leagues apart from one another, their lives were completely different, but Eddie couldn't help but feel a certain kind of kinship with Steve Harrington. Eddie had never really had another boy his age around that was also queer. It felt like a friendship that could maybe work out... a type of friendship Eddie had only momentarily glanced at on social media and online forums.

Eddie grumbled to himself and wiped his hands on his pants before finally taking the plunge and letting himself into the room.

Robin was standing at the front of the classroom and everyone else was spread out casually in either the desk seats or up against the wall. It was informal while also having a semblance of structure. Robin paused talking for a moment as Eddie walked in, and everyone half turned to see what the disruption had been–which made Eddie's hair stand on end. But that stopped soon enough as Robin flashed him a quick smile before continuing to talk.

"Okay, refocus. Alright, so that's what we're considering. We just have to figure out what we want the exact acronym change to be." 

She blathered as Eddie quietly found himself a seat in the back of the room until the conversation was over. He didn't know what they were talking about, but there was humming and hawing from everyone before some girl Eddie didn't know spoke up.

"LGBTQ plus alliance?" She asked, or more suggested Eddie guessed.

"You're missing like a bunch of people though," another girl chimed in, sounding annoyed, "we want people who are intersex or asexual to feel welcome too, don't we?"

"LGBTQIA plus?" Will commented, making brief eye contact with Eddie to acknowledge that he saw him. It was a friendly look and Eddie half smiled back before his attention drifting.

This was the kind of stuff he liked to avoid. He didn't understand why they had debates over these things, but they seemed to be wondering if they should change the club name to be more inclusive or whatever. He was behind it in theory, but he hated having to actually put in the effort to figure out what the best thing to do was. Still, it was a good idea at its core, just not an idea that made Eddie want to pay attention.

So instead, his eyes drifted and he caught himself staring at Steve who was leaning with his arms crossed against the wall watching Robin. He wasn't chiming in, but he seemed to be listening. It was sort of hard to miss Steve with how brightly he was dressed–he was wearing a striped white and blue shirt that was partly covered by an open red button-up and gray pants. The red was this deep colour and it stood out rather charmingly against the muted tones of his shirt and pants.

The debate continued and Steve turned to look at Eddie who instantly tensed as they made eye contact. Steve seemed to consider for a moment, looking back at Robin before quietly leaving to walk to the back of the classroom where Eddie was.

"Hey," he whispered, obviously trying not to disrupt the conversation they were having at the front of the class.

"Hey..." Eddie replied, sitting up a bit as Steve took the seat beside him so they could talk in hushed tones.

"We're talking about renaming the club, just like... I guess looking for suggestions to be on the ballet or something," Steve offered as an explanation. Eddie had figured that out already, but he nodded anyway as he clasped his hands together on top of the desk.

"The acronym is too long," Eddie sighed lightly, not wanting to disrupt the room for once. He felt weird sitting here with Steve though, both comforted and anxious about their proximity.

"We should just call it the Alphabet Mafia and be done with it," Eddie joked lightly which surprisingly got a quick bark of a laugh from Steve.

Everyone turned to look at them both and Steve covered his mouth, waving their attention off.

"Sorry, sorry," he exclaimed, putting his hands up in an apologetic way. The room went back to discussing and Steve sat back, crossing his arms again as he smiled.

"You've never heard that before?" Eddie asked, feeling the swell of anxiety be replaced with glee at how big Steve's reaction had been.

"No, it's a thing?" Steve asked, looking amused.

Eddie smiled back at him before slumping across the desk and reaching his hands forward– just needing something to do so he didn't go stir-crazy.

"I have much to teach you young padawan," he joked, putting on a bit of an accent but not leaning too hard into the bit.

Steve breathed another small laugh and grew quiet as he sat there. It was a comfortable silence though and one Eddie didn't feel scrutinized while occupying as they sat there.

Steve's phone buzzed and he took it out before tapping away at the screen and half laughing at something before swiping it away. He started to type and Eddie glanced at him, noting the little yellow border and the casual way Steve was acting while he texted. Steve seemed to notice Eddie staring and then waggled his phone at Eddie.

"Do you Snapchat?" he asked, not having any shame in showing Eddie his screen. Eddie hesitated, feeling put on the spot all of a sudden. He wasn't much of a social media guy and only really existed on platforms out of necessity to stay in touch with friends and the likes, but he didn't pay attention to it really.

"Uh, I think so?" Eddie said, taking his own phone out. He felt a bit self-conscious holding his old, beaten-up phone next to Steve's brand-new one. Eddie's screen was smashed in the top corner and you could vaguely see the hint of pink glitter around the edge that was partly covered by Eddie's phone case. He had gotten the phone second-hand from someone else's trade-in, but he had been unable to pick the glitter off the back of it. He didn't like to think about the little girl this phone probably belonged to before he got it.

"I don't use it," Eddie explained, finding the app downloaded in his files and opening it for the first time in ages. He looked at the screen and then shrugged, trying a couple of times at the log-in before getting into his account.

"Take a picture with me," Steve said, already leaning towards Eddie and holding his phone out to take a selfie. He was obviously intent on sending it as a snap to someone, but Eddie blanched and pulled his hair in front of his face.

"No, no, man, don't. I'm good–" Eddie stammered, putting his hand up to cover up the camera. A part of him was flattered so he was still smiling, but the horror he had felt hearing that sentence was undeniable.

Steve stopped, but he gave Eddie a confused look, half laughing as he put the phone down.

"Why?" He asked, finding it a bit amusing no doubt. He could probably see that Eddie was smiling and wasn't taking the whole thing too seriously. 

"Cause I forgot to do my makeup this morning," Eddie squeaked, hamming it up as he put his hand dramatically over his forehead and then turned his shoulder away like a demure lady.

Steve chuckled and leaned forward, pinching his brows in. It was obvious he was willing to accept the answer, but he didn't really get the joke. Eddie had only started to act silly because he felt uncomfortable, but he didn't want to tell Steve the real reason he didn't want his picture taken was because it would be a picture of them... together.

"I just don't really like my picture being taken," Eddie lied, sounding awkward enough that the delivery had been convincing.

"Okay..." Steve agreed, looking away and not pushing the subject. He seemed a bit amused by Eddie's comment–almost in a charmed way–even if Eddie could tell he didn't really understand. Eddie felt his heart twist at that, appreciating that Steve wasn't forcing him even though it was obvious that he was confused.

"You can add me though..." Eddie offered pushing his phone towards Steve and feeling nervous about the whole thing.

Steve huffed a laugh and then sat up again, taking Eddie's phone and starting to type.

"Snapchat kind of involves taking photos of yourself," he teased lightly, and Eddie felt his cheeks go a bit red. This felt so weird... Steve was adding him on Snapchat? What the ever living hell?

"You have Insta?" Steve asked and Eddie looked back at him, feeling a bit shell-shocked.

"Yeah, uh, yeah. But I uh..." he started, feeling like a fish out of water.

"Don't really use it?" Steve asked back, mocking Eddie a bit. Eddie felt his face getting hotter with embarrassment even though he could see Steve shaking his head and smiling. 

"Here," Steve asked, handing the phone back over, "I added myself."

Eddie nodded and took the phone back, looking at the screen and observing the new follower that popped up on his phone as Steve typed away on his own screen. SS.Harrington, it read with a little picture of Steve standing with his back to the camera in his baseball uniform. It was so painfully jock Eddie didn't know what to do. He wasn't even sure what his icon was anymore and he cringed slightly as he checked and saw his own page for the first time in a while. His username was something he had thought up on the fly years ago, MangledMetalMunson, since just Mangled Metal and Metal Munson had been taken and his icon was just a photo of one of his hands covered in rings. Weird... lame. Super lame. 

Eddie pocketed his phone and resigned himself to unpack all of that later as he tried to force himself to look forward again and pay attention to whatever Robin was saying. They were still debating back and forth and Eddie could feel himself getting frustrated by 'this acronym is better' over 'that acronym is too confusing.'

"We should really just drop the acronym," Eddie said quietly, slouching down again and putting his head in his hand. This was boring... and despite getting a chance to talk to Steve some more, he wasn't very interested in staying.

"What do you think it should be?" Steve asked, crossing his arms again and leaning back. He looked suave sitting like that: superior somehow as if he was some noble and the rest of them were peons.

Eddie shrugged and looked forward again, not wanting to get wrapped up in how Steve was posing.

"Just queer or something. Queer Alliance, Queer Club–I don't know."

"Not everyone likes being called... queer though, right?" Steve asked and Eddie noted that there was less hesitation in how he said the word compared to before.

"I guess, but not everyone likes being called gay either, so like..." Eddie half shrugged, hoping he made his point. He would much rather people individually choose what they wanted to be called and then just use the "big bad Q-word" as the universal phrase instead of cringing at it.

"Queer literally just means everyone who isn't cisgender and heterosexual, that's it. It's not that deep. The only people really pushing the 'don't say queer' agenda are people who hate that we can be united by the word and those who have been tricked by those people," Eddie said, sounding bored and a touch annoyed. He believed that pretty strongly actually, and hated that there always seemed to be this 'separation' between all the letters of the LGBTIQIA+ rather than unity. It was important for everyone to have an identity, but not when it created in-fighting.

"GSA!" Eddie yelled from the back of the room without warning, not even bothering to sit up.

Everyone stopped and looked at him, the silence drawing out a bit. It looked like someone was looking for an explanation before Eddie spoke up again.

"Genders and Sexualities Alliance," Eddie explained, sitting up a little now and crossing his arms again, "or Pride Club or something. You're never going to fit everyone into one acronym, so it's better to go broader."

"Okay..." Robin replied, obviously a little annoyed. She didn't seem to dislike the idea but probably wasn't grateful for the way the information was delivered.

"I still like LGBTIQA plus," someone offered which got a murmuring of replies.

Eddie shrugged, not too concerned about the attention being taken away from him again as the club went back to discussing.

"Y'all doing anything else today?" Eddie asked Steve quietly, sounding a bit put out. 

"I don't know," Steve snorted slightly, taking his phone out again and just sort of surfing. 

The next thirty minutes or so continued like that until the group had settled on four options to put on the ballet–two of which Eddie had suggested and that privately made his ego swell–before calling a close to the discussion. They had a week to think it over and then hand in their ballet at the beginning of the next club day before they came to a conclusion.

Much to Eddie's relief though after the discussion the club seemed to devolve into something more fun. Games were brought out and there was a rousing round of Cards Against Humanity that Eddie actually enjoyed. People broke off into little groups after some time and just socialized, with no real structure to it at all. Robin and two other girls–Hannah and Vickie–split off to gather with Steve and Eddie as the club's older members. Hannah was in Steve's grade and rather sporty from what Eddie could tell–volleyball or something–but he had never interacted with her at all. And Vickie seemed to be Robin's age; Eddie could remember vaguely seeing her at a house party or two he had been to in the past. He couldn't be sure, but at the time he had thought she was with a boyfriend and had quietly noted that he seemed like an ass. He was from out of town or something, and seemed to be older than Vickie–maybe out of high school old. He hadn't really liked that all too much, especially since the crowd they were all hanging out with was a bit rougher. That didn't mean much to Eddie himself–hanging out with pot-heads and punks was kind of a given for him–but Vickie was 15 and already seemed to be getting in over her head.

It was an enjoyable visit and Eddie decided by the end of it that he liked Vickie and confirmed that he thought Robin was pretty cool too. She was a nerd and while Vickie seemed to be much softer-spoken and a bit more "basic," she didn't lack interest or involvement in the conversation. Hannah on the other hand felt just too... sporty. It wasn't even like a butch sporty, Eddie couldn't really put his finger on it, but it felt like she just didn't have a ton of options for queer people her age so she hung out here even though it wasn't really her scene. Whatever though, it didn't really matter, Eddie was the odd one out too in this scenario.

Club closed and Robin locked the classroom door as they all left, the younger crowd having filtered out earlier while Steve and Robin had stuck behind to close up. Eddie had lingered and secretly hoped Steve would offer him a ride home again. It felt a bit presumptuous of him, but they lived near one another, and... they seemed to be getting along. Robin had stuck around though and was even bumping shoulders with Steve as they walked out towards the parking lot. It was nice actually. It was nice seeing that Robin and Steve got on so well and Eddie couldn't help but think that Steve’s smile looked a bit more genuine compared to how it was in the hallway when he was talking to his jock friends. 

"You need a ride?" Steve asked, half looking over his shoulder at Eddie. 

"Uh, yeah, sure," Eddie stammered a bit, hands stuffed in his pockets. He had been looking for that question and he privately hoped he hadn't come across as desperate for having hung around. 

"No complaining about what we listen to, Munson," Robin threatened as he trotted towards Steve's car and got to the passenger's side before anyone else could.

Oh, great. Robin was coming too.... Eddie supposed this was their routine after weeks and weeks of club meetings. Steve probably gave her a ride most days. That was nice, but Eddie couldn't help but feel a jealous twist in his gut.

"You're a proper chauffeur," Eddie commented, trying to keep the moodiness out of his tone as he went to the back seat and got in.

Steve shrugged and didn't make a fuss over any of it as Robin fiddled with the radio dial before settling on some kind of pop station. Charming.

Eddie stayed quiet for most of the ride and despite being annoyed that he wasn't up front he had to admit he liked watching Robin and Steve interact. They were both animated and would talk over one another, arguing here and there about nothing in particular. It was fun and had Eddie smiling by the time they got to Robin's place. Even then, Robin had sat in the car for an extra 10 minutes so the two of them could finish their 'fight.' She didn't leave until Eddie chimed in finally.

"Okay, Jesus H. Christ, Buckley," Eddie grumbled in a good-natured way, getting out of the car and going to the passenger's side door. "Get going, Lord, not all of us have until midnight to get to their front porch. I'm sure this conversation can rage on tomorrow."

"Jealous much?" Robin asked, scoffing and crossing her arms. "You're just trying to get Stevie here all to yourself."

Eddie scowled at her, still holding the door open. While that was partly true, it wasn't for anything nefarious and genuinely Eddie was getting bored with waiting in the backseat while Thing 1 and Thing 2 hotly debated whether or not Justin Bieber's "redemption" was real or not. Eddie seriously did not care about celebrity news and had zero interest in learning more. 

Robin did eventually get out and say her goodbyes which had Eddie sighing dramatically before he eventually climbed into the front seat where she had been previously. The first thing he did was turn off the radio and then glance at Steve who was laughing a bit and leaning on his steering wheel. Eddie paused, his stomach turning before dramatically putting his hand to his forehead.

"Aaaalllooooonnnee at llaaaaasssstt," he sang, putting on an exaggerated version of the piece 'At Last' only to realize that the song was something of a love song. 

Steve chuckled anyway, shifting his car back into gear. 

"What?" He asked, looking amused but confused. 

"Etta James?" Eddie asked, lifting a brow at Steve. He was shocked he didn't know the song. It was a classic and even though he didn't listen to a lot of music outside of punk, metal, and rock, he still knew Etta James. 

Steve gave him a confused look, obviously not recognizing the name.

"Come on man," Eddie egged on, "At Last by Etta James. Release in 1960? You gotta know her, it's like... a really popular song."

"A popular song in the 60s? You know I wasn't alive, right?" Steve teased back which got an eye roll from Eddie in return.

"Har, har, and I was?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Steve quipped, driving off towards the trailer park, "I'd believe it if you told me you were a vampire."

Eddie snorted, leaning back in his seat before taking his fingers and putting them up by his mouth to mime fangs.

"Ah, yes, it is I–you have discooovered by deeeepest secret. I, Edward Munson, am in fact a vam-PIRE! And I simply love attending high school like a freaking weeeeiirdo as if I lived in Grand Forks. Curses, you must keep my secret Steben, for I know where-ist you liiiiive," Eddie joked, putting on an over-the-top Transylvanian accent which spurred a laugh from Steve in turn.

Eddie smiled at him before lowering his hands, feeling pleased with himself.

"Grand Forks?" Steve asked for clarification, pinching his brows together.

"Yeah, Twilight or whatever," Eddie answered before pausing for a moment, "I think it's Grand Forks? Maybe just Forks? I don't know man, I never actually read or watched the damn thing. Kind of ruined vampires in my opinion."

Steve laughed a bit again, obviously not having much of an opinion on the matter. The Twilight movies had been pretty big in the last couple of years and it was hard to avoid retaining at least some knowledge about it. Still, Eddie had avoided the books and the movies like the plague and had felt pretty strongly that Twilight truly had ruined the legitimately cool image that most fantasy vampires had before they sparkled and crap. 

"Ruined vampires, huh?" Steve asked, sounding entertained by the idea.

"Oh, shut up, vampires are cool–or were cool, whatever," Eddie quipped back, crossing his arms and looking out the window. Honestly, he was a bit embarrassed for having gone on about vampires and nearly sung a love song to Steve. He liked that Steve was friendly, but he sort of forgot that they weren't really friends and his usual weird antics might not be cool to bring around this space, yet. 

"Name one," Steve said suddenly and Eddie looked at him with shock. He was being invited to talk about vampires of all things? Did Steve even care? Or was he just on an argument kick from his conversation with Robin?

"And it can't be Dracula," Steve explained further, the two of them starting to get close to the trailer park.

"Oh, I can't comment on thee classic vampire, and I only get like 5 minutes to convince you?" Eddie asked, smiling despite himself.

"Tick-tock, Munson," Steve sighed sarcastically.

"Fine–jeez. Uh, vampire? Well, we can get all into Buffy the Vampire Slayer if you want–and no, it's not just about killing vampires. Some vampires are pretty chill, good even, but you've got Camilla and Spike–"

"Spike?" Steve interrupted, laughing incredulously. 

"Don't! His name is stupid, I get it, but he's pretty cool. Him and Angel are–"

"Angel?"

"Oh, shut up! Angel is a bit of a priss until he turns evil, but Spike is like kinda evil but then a begrudging good guy. Anti-hero style," Eddie could see his trailer coming up, and felt pressed to explain in length why Spike was a cool vampire after all. 

"Okay–I'll just leave with like, my fav line he's ever said. Classic really," Eddie was unbuckling as Steve crept up towards his place, still looking amused.

"So he's like going by Buffy's house or whatever and she comes out all accusatory and is like 'what are you doing here?' and before he can answer she cuts him off and is all 'explain in five words or less.' So, Spike–who dresses like a total punk by the way, bleach blonde hair and red leather jacket and stuff–looks so put-out and lifts his hand and goes: out for a walk... bitch," Eddie explained, half posing and delivering the line with the same level of enunciation Spike originally used in the show. 

Steve snorted slightly, pinching his brows together at Eddie's rushed explanation, watching him. Eddie wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not, but Steve seemed entertained at least.

"Sounds... interesting," he finally said and Eddie could tell he wasn't actually all that interested.

"Whatever man, you have to see it. If you ever have time, I highly recommend 'What We Do in the Shadows.' It's a mockumentary about vampires in New Zealand and it's genuinely hilarious,"  Eddie said, trying to cover his anxiety with a hand wave as he let himself out of the car. 

"Okay?" Steve answered, confused in the same way he had been when Eddie explained why he didn't want his picture taken.

"It's good, trust me," Eddie huffed, half hanging out of the door of Steve's car.

"Alright, man. Let's watch it sometime then," Steve offered nonchalantly. 

Eddie didn't process the offer right away, too busy trying to get his limbs to work properly so he could climb out of Steve's car without face-planting. He was standing with the door open before he realized what had been said and he had to bend over to look at Steve inside the front of the cab. 

"What?" Eddie asked, knowing full well what he had heard, but not really believing it.

"Yeah, we'll watch it sometime or whatever," Steve repeated, not even looking at him as he adjusted his stick shift.

"Oh... sure," Eddie replied a bit weakly before swallowing thickly. He had been lingering for too long already, and he felt self-conscious about prolonging Steve's stay any longer. 

"Well, later then," Eddie concluded, carefully shutting Steve's door and hovering for a moment before Steve pulled away. It wasn't night this time so Steve didn't really need to wait for Eddie to get inside–not that Steve really had to wait at all for something like that. Well, maybe for girls he guessed....

Eddie covered a flush as he walked to his front door considering the fact that usually you'd wait for someone to get inside if you were either their parent or their date. It was something you did for girls you took out to make sure they didn't get jumped going to their house at night, which... sort of made Eddie feel soft for some reason. It wasn't like Steve was teasing him or calling him weak, maybe it was just habit, but Eddie couldn't deny that it had been a vaguely romantic gesture.

Eddie shook the thoughts off as he rolled his shoulders and walked to his room. He felt utterly stupid and he hated that he wanted to impress Steve. Maybe impress wasn't the right word, but he wanted Steve to like him. It felt like such a desperate plea for a friendship and he quietly wondered if he was barking up the wrong tree. He wasn't going to college next year–he wasn't even going to apply, he couldn't afford tuition and there was no reason to go into debt over a degree he didn't want–which meant he was stuck in Hawkins for a while yet. Sure, he wouldn't get as many opportunities to meet guys his own age he didn't already know sticking around here, but it sort of felt lame to be holding out for a friendship with Steve. They really didn't have anything in common. He wouldn't be trying so hard if Steve wasn't so... nice. Like he was surprisingly nice and Eddie wondered idly if he had always been this nice or if that was a new thing that came along with coming out.

PT4

[outrunningthedark]

I keep going back to this must be a lot of shippers “first” fandom. The “older” fans keep warning them, don’t fall for the sleight of hand. And it’s not to be jerks or hating on their ship, it’s because this isn’t new. Across media this a common marketing tactic, and 911 is just the latest in a laundry list of shows to do it. Unless Tim himself comes out and announces buddie is happening, don’t believe anything.

I'm almost certain age plays into fan reaction a ton (we can't deny that there are quite a few in their late teens/early twenties who haven't really experienced a ship like this), but I also think 9-1-1 fandom, more than any other fandom I've witnessed or been a part of (tbh), puts the show on an invisible pedestal just because their fave actor/character is involved. "Oliver wouldn't say such pro-Buddie stuff if he didn't know something." A) He can no longer (truly) be accused of queerbaiting when his character is queer and he views Buck's old scenes through that lens

B) He's giving these journalists clicks and helping his own show by giving them quotes about Buddie. Start talking about Bi Buck on his own and he'd be pushing Buck/Tommy instead. "9-1-1 is definitely gonna fire Edy after that story." Yes, because 9-1-1 (aka FOX and now ABC) is above employing problematic people who don't bring bigotry to set thanks to fictional story lines. /s "9-1-1 wouldn't do [insert story line here] because it disrespects this character" [9-1-1 does said story line for the drama] [Fandom vows not to watch, continues watching, complains] At the end of the day, the number one goal for everyone in charge is to keep viewers coming back for more. And when the casual viewer - the majority - doesn't immediately bow out because they're not begging for Buddie anyway or they understand it really is just a TV show? There is no incentive for anybody to change what works for as long as it proves to be working.

[prototypesteve]

hi! I just came across your acc and read some of your posts and you seem a really inspiring individual. im a 18yo demisexual person who's really close to their queerness (both in the sexuality and gender aspects) as its a fundamental part of my individuality. and i dunno, both my being acespec and genderqueer are a tricky... thing to get into when i want to get into relationships. im trying to be happy by myself. and this was very random and all, but as you're an adult aroace (i see very very few of them) its inspiring to me knowing I can still have a good, normal life? while living in full authenticity. idk. sorry if this is random. you dont have to reply. your account was nice to come across. have a wonderful day

Thank you for this. This is why I’m here. Honestly this is most of why I came out. Seriously.

Being Different and “New”.

The world is catching up with you, so you’ll have to be patient sometimes. Language often outpaces feelings. People know how to address genderqueer (they know all the words) but they’re still learning how to process genderqueer (they’re deconstructing all the old gender “archetypes” and stereotypes they were taught by parents and teachers who didn’t address or process genderqueer in their day). They will figure it out, because they can see it’s real. But it’s frustrating, in the meantime.

Even our own community of LGBTQIA+ (in Canada we use 2SLGBTQIA+, leading with 2S for two-spirit) is catching up with us in a lot of ways. The queer community has largely thought of queer as for/about genderqueer, and so when they see aros and aces and demisexuals and demiromantics, they have to either accept or reject that there’s a whole other layer of queer called relationship queer who intersect and overlap with genderqueer inside the bigger (and for some “newly bigger”) queer category/world/thing.

Being alone.

Alone is a complicated word for us. Aspec people experience a few kinds of alone-ness. There’s completion, which allos sometimes don’t get. We’re complete inasmuch as aspec people don’t have as many spaces in their lives where they need an “other half,” even though many of us spend a lot of our lives being told we have that space and we need to fill it. I wrote about that, here.

Then there’s the way we can can feel isolated from the bigger queer world because of the ways some people refuse to accept asexuality and aromanticism as queer, because they see it as a cishet thing, somehow.

We can feel isolated from traditional communities built around faith, politics, ethnicity, national identity, or even generational identity (GenX was wiiiiildly amatonormative), all because our defining differences are falsely interpreted as “new”. People misread our orientation as a phase, or a “made up internet thing” even though we’ve always been here. For ages, the world didn’t want to talk about all the asexual, aromantic, demisexual, and demiromantic people they could see everywhere—unlabelled, but plain as day—and now that we want to talk about ourselves, they’re going to say “you’re making that up”.

Then there’s the alone-ness of trying to explain how we do love, but differently. That one’s hard. I think that’s the one I’m going through the most, this year.

“See Also”:

Anyway, here’s a poorly-sorted and always growing “library” of links to my most popular social media posts, and stuff I’ve learned as an older ace. The recurring theme is that it really is going to be okay.

I’m still me, but now I know why. (How I explain my “thing” to straight friends who knew me from before I came out.)

Phase (You don’t outgrow it. I’m proof.)

Complete (Our complex relationship with “Alone”)

1994 (The counsellor story)

When I realized (Slow origin story)

Lifeline (Something bad happened to me when I was young, and believe it or not, Spider-Man rescued me.)

Recipe for Disaster (When life happens BEFORE you figure out your orientations)

Sexual Induction rather than a sexual awakening. (Things won’t always follow the romance novel playbook.)

Complicated. (Being queer AND Christian.)

Din Djarin Aroace Rep (We love. We just mostly do all the other kinds of love)

Treasure (a note to my trans friends)

Happy Ace Week (yes we’re here)

Masked (About not being out to everyone)

Negotiating (About gaining “acceptance” from the bigger queer community.

[weaselbeaselpants]

Making my own post and not linking OP because, genuinely I don't want them to get harassment for this

It's to the person who made this post

Full disclosure, for the UMPEENTH time: I don't give a rats ass about what Lily thinks about fictional characters. I used to. Then I met/knew/still know genuinely nice and critical people who hold the opinions Lily has but aren't Lily. I have friends who hate Steven Universe for justifiable reasons, same with SPOP. I personally dislike a lot of Friendship is Magic decisions and so do my mutuals like me. That's not the problem. Perhaps the reason people know OF Lily Orchard is through her -bad- media analysis, but it's not why people come away hating her, and it's DEFINITELY not the reason people are listening to the testimony of her victims and being rightfully horrified.

People talked of and about Lily Orchard for the same reason sane people clown on Mr. Enter; she's toxic and abusive. She's a bully and her 'idgaf' attitude is bad for fandoming and for critical culture. There's 'problematic' like critikal or breadtubers and then there is "lol fuck the haters who all want to r@pe me anyway, they're all n*zis anyway including the bipoc folks who I'm sure aren't real bipoc anyway. Now I'm going to police how other people take back slurs and how 'queer' is inherently offensive. I'm the REAL VOICE OF JUSTICE."

I called Lily the worst of "anti" fandom rhetoric because I mean it. She is a 'social-justice warrior' in the meanest ugliest sense of that word -ugly enough that basically everyone who's been called that by actual chuds will describe her as one. She talks over other people doing social justice, polices how other people use it, and only really cares about how it affects her. Frequently when people leave her fandom it's because Lily and her crew very cruelly shooed them away for not fitting Lily's exact interests and opinions 100%. Frankly I kind of hate that her attitude is labeled as 'radical' or 'anarchonistic' because she's 'unapologetic'. No. Real anarchists are people like decolonizetheleft or heritageposts --those two are both very blunt and quick to bite back if you throw them bullshit, but they also are not vitriolic and know that people are complex even when they post stuff other people wouldn't. Lily's not even a good call-out machine. She's nothing on HBomberGuy or D'Angelo Wallace or Shanespear. I'm still mad at her, not for SU, but how she responded to other critics of SU who told her not to joke about Rebecca Sugar being a fascist. She told them, some of them Jewish people, that they're just butthurt at her ripping and not her trying to talk over other people. I'm still mad at her for siding with a n*zi until she realized that looked bad for her and her cruelty towards other lgbtq people over how they use the word "queer".

She's been doing this for YEARS. She dropped in on old brony discourse this exact same way and it fucking sucked because, you know, people in fandom or the show itself DID do shitty things. We needed genuine help weeding out the bad actors around us; it sucked that one of said bad actors was trying to speak for us. Now imagine this but amplified to a woman with some native heritage trying to talk down how other people see and talk about THEIR cultures. It's always been a massive headache.

Britt has also been around for years though and so has all the evidence and trails left of Stockholm before Lily decided to redact it completely. Lily absolutely wrote that. She absolutely wrote cp. I was there for back when she still proudly referenced it.

"Why don't you move on and stop obsessing?"

Believe me I'd LIKE to. It's that extra element of worrying behavior that goes beyond annoyance with a youtuber like Lindsay Ellis or Quinton Reviews that has kept me always watching from the sidelines. If I be an "anti" (frankly, every proshipper I've ever met who's seen the receipts from Stockholm has the same take as me, so idk) for having 0 tolerance fictional material of children than it would be hypocritical not to hold 'one of my own' up to those standards especially when she DOESN'T own up to writing it when I know for a fact she did.

Fuck lousy chudheads and Vaushsluts and general KFcreeps who think any of this is funny and 'just lolcow behavior' and misgender Lily while they do it. Fuck transphobes.

Transphobes, chuds and ''stalkers'' are not the people ILoveKimPossibleALot brought into her video. Op, I genuinely hope you get away from Lily's influence. You deserve better. For now though I'm putting you and anyone else who unironically stans Lily on block. I am done hearing anymore excuses for this woman's character. I can't hear that anymore than I can't hear actual bigots use Lily to besmerch others -other trans folks, other liberals, other disabled people like me. I'm done.

[chevelleneech]

It’s weird you claim to know the mind of a 32 year old man doing his job. Based off social media? He can’t even keep the same photos on his feed for a month. He’s been liking buddie stuff for years now so he will continue to do it. Isn’t this the same ship that pushed him off Twitter?

Also he mentioned in several interviews he couldn’t wait to get know Lou on and off screen. So take that as will 🤷‍♂️

Anon, what are you here for, if not to prove yourself as the Lou/Tommy defense team captain? For no reason, at that, because I never said Oliver dislikes Lou or Tommy. I said I think my earlier assumption that he prefers/ships Buddie, was correct, and I stand by it.

Y’all can try as hard as you want to play the “You don’t know them!” or “He’s doing his jobs!” cards, but 1) the same applies to BuckTommy, and Lou making folks pay for headcanons, and 2) is intentionally dismissive.

Of course we don’t know Oliver. Anyone who thinks they do is crazy, but that doesn’t mean Oliver saying for years that he’s open to Buddie, saying this season he was prepared to play Buck as queer, and consistently liking or reposting Buddie fan art is all a lie. Oliver is allowed to have a preferred ship the same way Lou is, but I have yet to see a BT shipper say what’s he’s doing is weird.

Y’all need that validation because Oliver is not giving it, but is also not damning y’all in interviews. He doesn’t appear to be that kind of person, aka he is doing his job properly. He’s neutral or positive about the storylines he likes, and is seemingly neutral to silent on the ones he doesn’t. Pointing that out has nothing to do with Lou or Tommy, tbh. It’s about Oliver’s apparent preference.

Lastly, Buddie didn’t run him off Twitter, as he’s already said. It was people who shipped Buddie and wanted him to confirm them becoming canon, and would say he was queerbaiting if he posted Buddie despite Buck dating a woman in canon. Oliver literally said this year, he left Twitter because he wanted to discuss the ship and Buck’s queerness yet couldn’t. Now he can, because Buck is bi and the relationship is technically more possible. So what is your point in bringing this up, beyond trying to act like he dislikes the ship yet has to talk about it? He don’t talk about shit he don’t want to, as is established by his constant behavior.

I know y’all higher than thou types love to pretend celebrities aren’t actual people and can never be authentic without exposing their entire lives to social media, but it’s not true. Who knows how he really and truly feels about a single thing, but I mean… he’s been consistent for years. Oliver is famous and appeasing fans is part of his job, but that doesn’t make him a walking empty shell. If that’s how you prefer to see him, go ahead. If ignoring his posts and words unless they’re in praise to Lou and Tommy works best for you to continue shipping what you ship, go ahead. But slithering up your pedestal to talk down on Buddie shippers who do pay attention to his socials, is a waste of your time.

We all sipping from the same parasocial tea, you just don’t think your cup got cracks in it too.

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

31st august 2024, saturday

day 6/50 productivity challenge

also pls don't mind me just switching format styles for these posts every other day, i want to see what i prefer the most. i think i prefer the previous ~going through the day chronologically~ typa format more, lets me rant more lol.

🕒 7:00 a.m.

academic

completed chemistry classwork (in school, stuff i missed on tuesday)

made notes psychology ch-1: what is psychology?

started making ppt for biology seminar

body

morning skincare

showered

walked for an hour (caught up with a friend in my apartment who's also in 11th, i haven't talked to him since just after board results came out. i seem to have been misjudging a lot of people lately but also i can see that the both of us have grown in mindset and i feel so much more comfortable talking to him now. rant incoming!! there was this certain incident that happened way back in the first half of 2023 and i realized that my apartment friends were actually quite homophobic/transphobic. it was more a bigotry born out of ignorance & the 'phobes pushing lies than anything but that was a time that i had just figured out my sexuality. now listen it's not my job to fix ppl or anything. but after talking to him today i realize he's actually quite a nice person but social media algorithms have shown all the wrong things. UNLIKE with the other two people in the ~incident~ who are just.. ugh can't describe them (in a bad way).. anyways me & him have a lot of values that align and he is open to listening. he knew about me being queer when i was still questioning and though he reacted in a way i didn't like, it didn't change our relationship or dynamic. maybe he just forgot, i only made a passing remark that i thought i was bi after all. anyways, i feel comfortable opening up to him about some stuff so i think i might properly come out to him one day too. maybe right before leaving for college but that's like 2 years away lol. but if the past few months have taught me anything, it's that i'm growing up and i should hold on to the friends who value me and listen to my opinions. friends make your life so much richer and i've never been the best at making them. i don't have many friends but the ones i do, i want to cherish. he is not perfect in anyway whatsoever but quite thoughtful for a 15yr old cishet boy)

other

extended duolingo streak (b4 school)

practiced playing keyboard

read newspaper: times of india

folded laundry

🕒 2:00 a.m.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I break off an old friendship with someone who stayed by my side despite my mental and general life issues, after everyone else had left?

This friend from high school had been a great friend, kept me company when I was all alone, supported me through two bad breakups, we went to the same college and we were very close.

Until I started talking more openly about politics, being queer, mental health etc. She's the facebook liberal type, slightly left of center. She gave me the freedom to be more open with her by being cool with taboo topics, then turned sour when it extended beyond what she knew. Examples, she'd change subject if I talked about queer media when normally she's telling her friends how she had a sleepover with her "wife" and saw each other naked. She was surprised to learn that you're not supposed to out someone against their will. She believes cops are bad only in USA. We're not Americans.

She started being open with me too, she told me how she hated it when her classmates talked about their favorite music, how she hated any fandom stuff they talked about besides discussing fanfics with another fandom friend, how she makes excuses so she can go wherever she wants alone and not with friends. She told me she spies on my exes on facebook insta etc and tried to tell me what they've been up to and only stopped telling me about after many requests and explanations as to why that made me really uncomfortable.

A few months ago she and I had a fight, she exclaimed that my politics was too American (I'm just an average leftist like most of 30+ tumblr and my other friends), that my politics was too fandom oriented (she avoids fandom so much she has blocked activists for even hinting at being a fandomgoer, like discussion of racism in fandom is waste of time and silly to her, fan-anything can't be taken seriously), mocked me for having childish interests (just knowing pop culture in general) then we stopped talking.

After some months she texted that she really misses talking to me as I was her only "progressive friend" who understood her when she wanted to discuss feminism, movies, world politics etc. She said she needed me to be her gateway to pop culture knowledge as I knew so many cool new things. She begged me to be friends again, and since I missed hanging out with her a lot I started chatting again. But I told her that it was hard for me to forgive her and I'd leave for real if she hurts me again.

This time she let go of the normal daily stuff we used to talk about and only stuck to Topics of Debate. She asked me to teach her progressive thinking, educate her, but when I asked if she wanted to touch on lgbt+ topics or physical -mental health related topics outside of her comfort zone of basic sexual health, she danced around a lot instead of giving an answer. I snapped and asked yes or no, she said no.

I asked her if she understands that even if she didn't feel like those topics were her priority, I'd probably want to talk about them with her as a queer neurodivergent person and friend, would that be an issue? She kind of ignored it to say that basically her priority was just local political gossip, religion, and a little bit of solarpunk stuff, outdated at that. I was disappointed but let it go and we decided to talk later.

The other day she messaged me with her usual gossip about how her friends are being too excited about some music stuff and what book she thinks I should read (we have completely different taste). And I got a panic attack. Since then I've had multiple panic attacks at the thought of having to talk to her.

She has been one of my oldest friends, she supported me and took my side in every breakup I had and she forced me to go outside when I was severely depressed, she was practically family, but now I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. If I bring up any topic she dislikes she's going to turn away, if I come out to her as trans she'll joke and start to avoid me, she doesn't want to learn anything new even though she takes pride in being a great learner, if I talk about things that make me happy she'll ignore it. I don't know if she'll go and tell others how cringey my interests are. Maybe she'll go to my exes and tell them I used her as support and threw her away when she didn't meet the standard as that's been a line of thinking among my exes.

I'm also struggling with BPD and anxiety, so maybe I'm hating her now and will want her back later, it's my brain being a jerk? I think I'm overreacting and she won't do any of these, but I also feel so drained after we talk these days. I need friends who I can talk to about mundane things, friends who share memes with me and tell me what anime they're passionate about, what new recipe they liked, instead I feel like I'm just there to drag her down with my issues and politics and dumb jokes. But multiple people think I used and discarded them for not agreeing politically, I'd usually disagree but what if I am the problem and I expect too much?

So I'm asking, am I being a jerk if I cut her off?

What are these acronyms?