#SORRY THIS SORTA TURNED INTO ANGST AT THE END DON’T HATE ME | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

supernaturalgirl20 · 1 year

Note

Hey! Your writing is stellar!

Could you possibly write about Joel and reader hating each others guts, but something like Joel almost dying brings the feelings out reader never realized. (Like angsty almost dying lol). she takes care of him and he sees how he does actually love her. It’s ends with them together. Vague i know haha.

Thank you!! xoxo

Thank you so much and I adored this request 🥰changed it up a little Hope you enjoy 😉

The Reason

Pairings: Joel Miller x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, soft love making, near fatal accident, mentions of death, hidden feelings, enemies to lovers (sorta), angst, cursing, fluff.

A/N: slowly getting back to writing this week so please bear with me on the requests. Didn't edit this so sorry for any mistakes.

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

Anger bubbled under the surface of your skin as you stood with your back against the door of the stables. The sound of his voice echoed through the air as he berated Tommy for asking you to join them.

Who does he think he is? You think to yourself as you listen to him criticise you to his brother. Joel Miller was a force to be reckoned with and he had zero tolerance for anyone in the Jackson community except for you. Or at least you’d thought so, now you weren’t so sure.

There was one night after a rough patrol where he’d shared a few drinks with you, and he’d opened up about his past. You had thought for a moment that maybe he liked you. Maybe you both could become friends or more, but now, you’re sure he hates you.

“Now why the hell did you go and ask her to come with us? You know darn well that I ain’t gonna be able to concentrate with her there. Damn it, Tommy, I ain’t gonna be able to keep them both safe.”

With clenched fists you turned the corner and stormed towards him, his eyes widening when he spots you. “Who the hell do you think you are, Miller? Huh? Telling Tommy you don’t want me to come. It doesn't matter what you want, I’m the most experienced shot this place has so I’m more than capable of taking care of myself. Now I’m coming on this run whether you like it or not.” You huffed out a breath as you poked his chest with your finger, looking up at him with an angry expression on your face.

“So, saddle up, cowboy.” You push him back slightly before grabbing your horse and marching out of the stables, leaving both Miller brothers confused as they stared after you.

“About time you grew a pair Joel and told her the truth about how you feel. Save all this bickering. I mean it’s obvious as shit that you have feelings for her, so just man the fuck up.” Tommy says as he pats him on the back.

Ellie scoffs behind them drawing both of their attention to her. She looks up and shrugs her shoulders at them. “Gotta say I agree with Tommy on this one. Life would be a lot easier if you just told her. Hell, it’s so fucking obvious she feels the same and I swear you two are just like horny fucking teenagers.”

“Alright enough! First of all, language,” he snaps as he points a finger in Ellie’s direction. “Secondly, what is this anyhow? Gang up on Joel day?” His gaze drifts between the pair and they smile at each other before they shrug, and Tommy says his goodbyes.

“Alright, let’s get this shit show on the road,” Ellie teases as she winks at Joel and follows you outside.

Joel watches her leave, his hands resting on his hips as he closes his eyes briefly and takes in a deep breath. This was gonna be a long trip.

***

Things had gone to shit when you came across a group of raiders in a nearby abandoned town. They had wanted all of your supplies as well as you and Ellie but Joel was having none of it.

He’d become a different man in the blink of an eye. A violent one and you can’t say it didn’t turn you on. He’d killed them all or at least so you’d thought until one of them had snuck up behind him and tackled him to the ground.

They tussled for a moment before Joel straddled him and beat him to the ground. When he stood, he turned around to face you, his breathing ragged as he flexed his hands, his knuckles were bruised and bloody. His gaze drifted away from you towards Ellie who was busy collecting weapons.

You let your gaze drift down his torso, and you gasped at the sight of a knife protruding from his abdomen.

“Joel!” The sound of your worried voice catches his attention and his gaze flickers towards you. He follows your line of sight and groans when he sees the knife. His hand wraps around the hilt and pulls, blood spurting out from the wound, and he stumbles slightly as he throws the knife into the ground.

“Let’s go.” His voice is commanding, leaving no room for argument. “Ellie,” you shout, “we gotta go.” You tilt your head towards her horse and rush over to help Joel up onto your own, placing him at the front.

“Joel’s been hurt. We gotta find somewhere to lay low for a while.” You jump up behind Joel wrapping your arms around his waist as you grab the reins.

You travel at a slow pace. Trying hard not to jostle him around too much but he’s losing a lot of blood, and fast. His head droops to the side, then his whole-body leans to the right and you try to catch him but you can’t hold his weight so he falls off the horse.

“Ellie, stop!” you shout as you hop off the horse and check on him. He’s passed out. It almost appears as if he’s dead, but you run your fingers along his neck and check for a pulse.

It’s there.

Faint, but there and you let out a sigh of relief. Turning your gaze to Ellie you see the unshed tears in her eyes as she stares down at Joel. “He’s gonna be ok. I need you to help me lift him back onto the horse. Those houses over there,” you say with a tilt of your head.

“We’ll stop there for now. Try to close over his wound.” She nods at you before helping you lift him. It’s a struggle but you manage all the same and you take a hold of the reins as you guide the horse along the trail. A silent prayer recited in your head that he’d be ok, that he’d make it through this.

***

Joel is laying on the mattress you’d found as Ellie rips off a piece of cloth to hold over his wound. He groans loudly and you drop to your knees beside him pushing Ellie out of the way and putting pressure on his abdomen. He writhes in pain for a moment before he grabs your hand.

“Leave.” He rasps, his breathing becoming more laboured with each breath. You shake your head as you continue to put pressure on the wound.

“Leave. Go north…. Tommy,” his grip on your hand tightens and you finally meet his gaze. “No. I’m not leaving you. Don’t - don’t ask that of me…. I can’t.”

His skin is clammy and pale, and your heart feels like it’s being ripped apart. You can’t lose him. Not now.

“Ellie.” Your gaze drifts towards the teenager and she’s standing still, face full of worry as she stares down at Joel. “Ellie,” you shout, grabbing her attention.

“You need to go and look for medical supplies. Bandages, gauze, needle and thread, anything. Now, Ellie.”

She looks down at Joel one last time before she rushes up the stairs. He groans again, his eyes full of pain as he stares up at you shivering.

You pull his jacket up over him before cupping his cheek in your hand. “You’re gonna make it through this. I promise.”

You stand up and quickly move across the room to grab your bag, rifling through it until you find what you're looking for. Pills in hand you pull out a bottle of water and drop to your knees again.

Gently, you lift his head and place the tablets in his mouth before bringing the bottle of water to his lips. “Drink. These will help with the pain.”

He obeys with a groan, swallowing the pills before you rest his head back on the mattress. “I gotta clean this, Joel. I’m gonna…. I gotta clean the wound, ok?”

He nods his head, his body trembling as he shivers uncontrollably. You pop open the bottle of alcohol and take a deep breath before you remove the jacket and lift his shirt.

Your hand shakes slightly as you stare at his stomach for a moment - the wound bloody and bruised and jagged looking - before you snap out of it and pour the alcohol over it, causing him to hiss in pain.

“I know, I know…. I’m sorry.” You turn your head at the sound of Ellie’s footsteps coming down the stairs. “I found this,” she says as she hands you a needle and thread. Her eyes widen at the sight of his stomach, and you cradle her cheek in your hand.

“He’s gonna be ok. I promise you. Now I need you to hold him down because this is gonna hurt like hell.” She nods her head and rushes around to kneel beside Joel, placing her hands on his shoulders.

His eyes stare up at her and he gives her a faint smile before his gaze drifts to you again. You pull the thread through the needle and tie it off before sterilising it with the alcohol. You meet his gaze and nod before taking a deep breath and pushing the needle through his skin.

He groans loudly, reaching his hand up to grab at your arm. He turns his head away from you, shutting his eyes tightly as he tries to hold in his cries, Ellie pushing down on him to stop him from moving.

The needle falls to the floor once you’ve finished sewing him up and you sit back on the ground staring at your shaking hands. They were covered in blood. His blood and the fact that you could’ve lost him today stirs something inside you.

Feelings that you didn’t think you had. Not for him. Sure, you thought he was handsome, that he was a good father to Ellie, but he hated you. So, you hated him. At least, that’s what you tried to convince yourself.

It was all too much. These feelings, and the way he was looking up at you made your chest hurt. Standing, you rush up the stairs and out of the house, trying to take deep breaths.

“He is asking for you.” Ellie’s voice startles you and you whip your head around taking her in.

“I’m just gonna check the other houses for medicine. I’ll be back.” She takes a step forward but you shake your head. “I just need a minute, ok? Tell him I’ll be back.”

***

You’d taken your time, routing through the other abandoned houses trying to stall time as best as you could until you sort through your feelings.

It became clear around the fifth house that you had maybe always loved Joel Miller, you were just too stubborn to notice. It was also in that house you’d found some penicillin.

The creak of the stairs alerted Ellie to your presence, and she turned quickly, gun pointed in your direction. With a sigh of relief, she lowered it and stood, taking a glance at Joel before meeting you.

“He was worried about you. Tried to go after you but I wouldn’t let him. He’s asleep now but he keeps shaking and I think he has a slight fever.”

With a nod of your head, you brush a strand of her hair behind her ear. “There’s some canned food in the kitchen, you should head on up and get something to eat. We’re gonna be here for a while.”

“Ok, I’m starving. Want me to get you some?”

“I’m ok for now. Just don’t make too much noise. We don’t know if there are others in the area.” You let her go and turn your attention to Joel, who is laying in the same spot, shivering despite the heavy coat and blanket covering him.

You run your fingers through his hair, and he groans at the feeling of your touch. Pulling away you reach for the bottled water and grab one of the antibiotics before gently stirring him awake.

“Hmm,” he groans as his eyes slowly open, glossed over in pain as you smile softly down at him. “Hey, I’ve got some antibiotics. They should kill any infection even if they are out of date.”

Joel lifts his head enough for you to place the pill in his mouth and help him take a sip of water. Swallowing the pill, he drops back onto the mattress and looks up at you longingly.

“Was worried…thought somethin’…couldn’t live without you….” His hand reaches out towards you as he traces the soft curve of your face. The feel of his rough calloused fingers on your skin sets your heart racing.

“I’m ok. Ain’t nothing gonna happen to me. I learned from the best,” you say with a laugh as you nervously meet his gaze.

“I’m gonna get us some food, I'll be right….” You start to say but he shakes his head.

“No. Stay. Please.” His eyes are wide as he begs you to stay, shuffling around on the mattress as he tries to make room for you.

“What are you doing, Joel?” You ask, raising your eyebrows in question. He pats the space beside him indicating that he wants you to lay with him.

“What if I hurt you?” You ask as your eyes drift to his blood-stained shirt. “Won’t,” he breathes out as his eyes begin to droop closed. He’s still shivering slightly, and his skin still looks pale and clammy and you don’t have the heart to say no.

With a reluctant sigh, you remove your jacket and slip in beside him, making sure you’re both covered by the blankets. His arm is wrapped around you as you rest your head on his chest and the soft beating rhythm of his heart lulls you to sleep.

***

“No….no please not her….can’t lose her….no, no…” Joel muttered in his sleep as his head tossed around, his grip on your waist tightening.

He was having a nightmare.

Sitting up a little, you gently place your hand on his cheek, your thumb rubbing soothing circles into the rough surface of his face. “Joel,” you whisper, trying to wake him without startling him.

“Hey, Joel, it's ok. Wake up.” His eyes snap open and he panics until his gaze lands on you and his breathing slowly calms.

You gaze down at him with a soft smile on your face as you continue to rub his cheek. “You were having a nightmare. Are you ok?”

His eyes take in the features of your face as the moonlight shines through the small window of the basement. “M’fine. Thought I - thought I lost you ....” He trails off as he slowly realises what he’s saying.

His face has a little more colour to it and you swear you see the hint of a blush on his cheeks.

“I’m here. I’m fine. It was just a bad dream, probably induced by the fever,” you giggle as you place the back of your hand on his forehead. “Seems to have broken, finally.”

“I know you heard what I said to Tommy.” He says matter of factly. “I know you think that I hate you….”

“It’s fine, Joel. You don’t have to explain anything. That’s just life. You like some people, you hate others. It is what it is.” His eyes furrow as he looks up at you, a confused look taking over the features of his face.

“I don’t hate you. Never have. Don’t think I ever could. It's a bit hard to hate someone you’re in love with.”

“What?!” You stutter nervously, your eyes blinking rapidly as you swallow the lump in your throat.

“I love you darlin’. It’s the reason I didn’t want you to come on this run. I’m distracted when you’re out on patrol with me, I knew I’d be the same with this, it’s why I begged Tommy to reconsider letting you tag along. M’sorry if I ever made you feel like I hated you, 'cause I don't.”

You don’t know what to say. The words won’t form in your mind as you stare down at him in shock. He loves you. Your heart thrums loudly in your ears and you think for a moment that you’re gonna pass out.

“You alright, darlin?” The sound of his Texan drawl, soft and low, breaks you from your trance.

“Hmm? M’fine. I-I think I love you too.” His eyebrow quirks as a smile edges its way onto his face. “You think?” He teases.

You nudge him in the chest, and he groans, holding his side and you panic you’ve hurt his stitches. “Oh my god! I’m so sorry Joel. I completely forgot,” you rush out, voice panicked as you lift his shirt to check.

The sound of his laughter pulls your gaze up towards him. “Oh, for god's sake,” you huff as you turn and begin to push yourself off the mattress. His hand reaches out to grab your wrist, pulling you back into him.

“M’sorry, darlin’. Couldn’t resist.” His hand slips up along your curves and settles on your face, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes flicker briefly to your lips, and you unconsciously lick along your bottom lip, pulling it between your teeth.

“Will you two just kiss already? Jesus.” Ellie’s voice sounds from the top of the stairs. You both burst into laughter before he leans forward and captures your lips in a searing kiss.

His lips are a little rough, the feel of them against your own causing a shiver to work its way down your spine. He still tastes of whiskey he had earlier, and you want nothing more than push him down and fuck him into the mattress but you don’t. Instead, you pull away and rest your head against his, calming your racing heart.

“We should get some rest,” you breathe raggedly as you blink down at him.

Nodding his head, he kisses you softly once more before laying back on the mattress and pulling you with him, wrapping you up in his arms. “G’night, darlin’.”

***

The gates open and Tommy comes rushing out with a worried expression on his face. “What the hell happened?” He asks, his gaze drifting from Joel to you as he waits for someone to tell him.

“Long story,” Joel answers as he looks over at Ellie, a silent communication happening between them. Tommy huffs in frustration. “You’ve been gone for days. We thought - we thought you’d been killed or worse. Fuck!”

Joel slowly hops off the horse and makes his way towards his brother, clapping his hand on his back. “We’re alright, Tommy. Ain’t nothin’ to worry about. We’re just tired. Gonna need some more sleep and a decent meal.”

Tommy nods his head, his eyes drifting to both you and Ellie. “Sure. How about you all head home and I’ll have Jason drop the food over.”

“That sounds amazin’ little brother. You’re just gonna have to have Jason drop Y/N’s food over to my place.”

Tommy's face freezes in shock before a sly smirk plays across his face. “Oh yeah. Somethin’ happen while you were out there?” He asks Joel, his voice almost a whisper so only he could hear.

“Gentlemen never kiss and tell, Tommy. You should know that.” He smacks him on the back hard, winking at him before he turns and grabs his horse. Tommy knew something had happened from the slight blush on your cheeks. He’d get it out of Joel eventually.

***

The room had been filled with silence as you all ate the dinner that Jason had brought over. The only sound to be heard was that of your forks and knives scraping off the plate.

God, you hadn’t realised how hungry you were until the smell of the food hit your nose. The loud growl of your stomach made Joel smile as he finished setting the table.

“Fuck that was good,” Ellie says as she sits back in the chair, hands resting on her now full stomach.

“Manners,” Joel chastises as he pushes his plate away from him.

“She’s not wrong though,” you say with a smile as you place your knife and fork on the plate and release a contented sigh. Joel hums in response as he lets his gaze wander over you both.

He never thought he’d have this again. A normal life. A steady home. A family. Now that he does have it, he’s not too keen on letting it go. With the clearing of his throat, he throws Ellie a look, his eyes shifting towards the front door, and it only takes her a second to realise what he’s saying.

“I’m gonna go meet up with Dina. Don’t wait up ya old fart.” She says with a laugh as she grabs her coat and slams the door behind her.

“So…I guess I’ll help clear up and then I’ll let you get some rest.” You stand, the chair scraping across the floor as you grab your plate and make your way into the kitchen.

You turn the tap on and begin to wash up when a set of arms wrap around you from behind. You startle. A soft gasp slips past your lips as Joel turns you slowly in his arms.

You gulp nervously as you stare up at those golden-brown orbs. Your heart beats frantically at the feel of his touch. “Was thinkin’ maybe you could stay the night. I’ll make you pancakes and coffee in the morning.”

His eyes are hopeful as he waits for you to say something. “Are you trying to seduce me, Miller?” You tease as your arms come to rest on his chest. Your fingers playing with the buttons on his shirt.

“Is it workin’?” He says with a smile, his arms pulling you closer.

“Maybe. Might need you to kiss me though, to make sure.” A smile plays across his face as he leans in and kisses you softly. You tease his bottom lip with your tongue, and he groans into your mouth, his fingers digging into your hips as he grinds into you.

His cock hardens against you, and he groans when you run your hand down along his stomach and under the waistband of his jeans, cupping him with your hand.

“Fuck,” he breathes as he pulls away, forehead resting on yours. You run your fingers along the back of his neck and through his hair. “Need you,” you whisper into the shell of his ear, and he shivers.

“Jesus, darlin’. You’re gonna be the death of me.” He grabs your hand from his trousers and leads you out of the kitchen and up the stairs towards his bedroom, where he kicks the door closed behind him as he walks you back towards his bed.

He’s hungry for you. His eyes were blown wide with lust and you’re sure he’d have ravaged you by now if it weren’t for the fact that he’s healing.

You pull him in for another kiss and let your hands glide over him as you begin to unbutton his shirt. Throwing it onto the floor before starting on his trousers.

His rough calloused fingertips glide along your skin as he helps you remove your clothes, your breath hitching as they slip between your slick folds.

You gasp. His mouth swallows the moan that follows as he kisses you softly. Pulling back his eyes trail over your naked form and when your gazes meet, you see nothing but adoration in those brown eyes you love so much.

“How do you - how do you want to do this?” You ask as his hands grab onto the soft flesh of your ass. “Better take it slow for now. Don’t wanna burst a stitch,” he says with a smile in his voice. “Lay on your side, darlin’.”

Doing as he says, you lay on your side, his warmth filling all your senses as he slips in behind you. You let out a breathy moan as his fingers delve into your heat once more, his hardened cock nestled snugly between your ass cheeks.

“Oh fuck,” you whimper as he works his thick digits in and out of you, curling them ever so slightly as he hits that spot that sends you spiralling.

Your skin is flushed. Sweat beads down along your breasts as he pinches your nipple between his forefinger and thumb. A shiver skitters down your spine as he whispers into the shell of your ear.

“Ready for me darlin’?”

You nod, “yeah- yes, fuck I’m ready please,” you whine as he runs the tip of his cock teasingly along your slick. “Joel…”

“Tell me what you want, baby.”

“Need you inside - need you to fuck me, please.” With the head of his cock notched at your entrance he thrusts inside with a roll of his hips and you both let out a soft groan as he fills you.

“Jesus, darlin’. So damn tight…fuckin’ squeezing the life outa me.” He takes a moment, closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath as he tries to control himself. His lips meet the skin of your neck as he peppers kisses along it, his hips moving slowly in tandem with his lips.

It’s soft and slow. His hands glide over your skin, pinching and pulling as you moan softly into the room. Your body shudders as you come, your clit already sensitive from earlier.

A soft cry slips past your lips as you reach behind to run your fingers into his hair. His hips stutter as he nears his release, the soft grunting in your ear becoming louder the closer he gets.

“Ngh…fuck,” he groans as he quickly frees himself from your walls, spilling himself over the soft pillowy flesh of your ass.

“Don’t move, darlin’.” He says as he slowly slips from the bed and grabs a piece of cloth to clean you with. He works it gently over your skin before throwing it into the basket at the end of his bed.

The cool air makes you shiver involuntarily but Joel is quick to hop back into bed, slipping beneath the covers and pulling you close.

“I love you, darlin’,” he whispers into the crook of your neck and you can’t help the smile that works its way onto your face.

“Hmm, I love you too.” He squeezes you gently before his breathing evens out and he falls asleep. It’s safe to say that Joel Miller definitely doesn’t hate you.

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loveharlow · 1 year

Note

Hey I have a request love. I was wondering if you could write a fic based off the song “Die For You” by the weekend. I’m imagining it being JJ Maybank x Heyward! or Black!Reader. I imagine reader being part of the pogues and is close with pope but she’s pope’s younger sister. I imagine reader being pretty confident and really into makeup and sorta stubborn and independent. She also doesn’t take shit from anyone. I imagine her being close with JJ and there’s something more going on between them but she’s not the type to do hookups she’s more of a relationship girl. JJ knows that too and he’s trying to get over her and distance himself, but it doesn’t work. He’s hooking up with girls that look and act like her. But nothing works. Eventually she notices what’s going on and she calls him out, and JJ confesses, but right as they are about to kiss, she says she doesn’t know if she could betray Pope like that if they don’t work out. But JJ reassures reader that he’s only interested in her, and that she’s it for him. Then boom they kiss.

I hope you like it. 🤍🤍

HATE THAT YOU WANT ME

PAIRING ‧₊˚ JJ Maybank x Fem!Heyward!Reader

SYNOPSIS ‧₊˚ [7.2k] Y/n Heyward has had a long time crush on JJ Maybank, one which she thinks he reciprocates. One problem? He's her brother's best friend.

WARNING(S) ‧₊˚ pictures above do not depict the physical appearance of TR, swearing, mentions of betrayal, mutual pining, slight angst (mini-argument, confrontation), mild violence, unwanted advances, mentions/use of drugs & alcohol, Y/n being blunt (aka jealous), fluffy ending

A/N ‧₊˚ Hope I like it? Honey, I love it. I would have made this a multi-part if I had the time but this idea was perfection and I can only hope I executed this well enough for your brilliant mind. I got carried away...and if I'm not mistaken this is my longest fic to date.

˗ˏˋ jj masterlist ˎˊ˗

PULLING MY SWEATSHIRT OVER MY FRAME AS I SAT DOWN AT MY VANITY, I SCANNED MY EYES ACROSS THE MULTIPLE MAKEUP PRODUCTS I HAD SCATTERED ACROSS THE SURFACE. I was due to meet my brother and our friends at The Wreck soon to hang out and I was on a time-crunch. I had told Pope not to wait up and head out without me.

We’d all been pretty busy lately and even though we wouldn’t admit it verbally, we missed each other. So, Kie invited us to her dad’s restaurant near closing so we could catch up. So, lightly pampering and giving myself a once over in the oval-shaped mirror, I grabbed my phone off the bed and rushed out of the house, wanting to get there before it got too dark — knowing Pope would give me a dad-type lecture about, one, being late and two, walking alone in the dark. Especially on The Cut.

I WAS MET WITH PLAYFUL CHEERS AND GREETINGS THROUGH MOUTHFULS OF FOOD AS I ENTERED THE WRECK, EVERYONE ALREADY GATHERED AT THE TABLE NEAR THE BACK.

I turned to my left to see Mr.Carrera wiping down the counter where the register sat. Flashing him a warm smile, he returned it with a small one of his own and a welcoming wave. Heading towards the group of island delinquents I called my friends, I took a seat between my brother and JJ.

“Look who finally showed up.” John B teased, to which I rolled my eyes.

“You said you’d be here in thirty minutes. That was an hour ago.” Pope reprimanded with as much sternness in his voice as possible.

I smiled and snatched the baseball cap off the top of his head. “Sorry, my favorite big brother in the whole world.” I jested, putting the hat on my own head and crossing my arms over my chest before kicking my feet up on JJ's lap. He glanced down at my ankles across his thighs before raising a curious brow at me, throwing a fry into his mouth.

“I’m your only brother, you moron.” Pope shot back, swiftly taking his hat back for himself.

I scoffed, reaching forwards to grab the untouched glass of water that I assumed was mine. After taking a long sip, I held the glass in my hand as I used the other to stir the straw mindlessly. “What’d I miss?”

“Well,” JJ started, swallowing a mouthful of the burger he had taken an unnecessarily huge bite of. “Bree got back with Sarah. So, we don’t have to pick sides anymore. Well, at least you and Kie don’t.”

“No surprise there.”

“Wha-Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” John B babbled, his face contorting in mild frustration.

I rolled my eyes as I sat up straight, removing my legs from JJ’s lap. “Be honest with yourself, JB. You and Sarah are like.. a light switch. One minute you’re on, the next you’re off. It’s like a game to see how long you’ll keep the lights on.” I joked, John B only gave me a sour look to which I gave him a half shrug. “Y’know it’s true. I may be the youngest here, but I think you all could learn a thing or two from me.”

I was met with muffled chuckles beside me. Turning to see JJ trying to hold back a laugh. A look of bewilderment etched itself onto my face. ”What?”

He looked at me sideways, cocking a sarcastic brow at me. “All this talk from a girl that I had to bail out of jail last week for vandalizing a house on Figure Eight. You are quite literally worse than me. And that’s saying something.”

I groaned and threw my head back. “You what?” I heard the voice of a stunned Kiara.

“And you still owe me for not telling dad.” Pope reminded me to which I waved him off and he lightly pushed my head to the side.

I lowered my head to turn to the scruffy-haired blonde next to me with a death glare. “Well, at least I know not to ask for your help again.”

“You say that every time.” He smiled mischievously.

“Okay, we are not brushing past this.” Kiara spoke up, hands splayed out on the table in frustration, face scrunched in confusion. “When did you get arrested? And why did you vandalize a kook house?”

“I’d like to know, too.” John B added, raising his hand with a look of innocent curiosity.

I sighed deeply. “For one, I wasn’t arrested. I was detained. Barely there for two hours.” I denied. “And two, they over exaggerated the whole thing. I spray painted a kook’s garage because she fucked with me during gym. Tripped me when we were running laps and stole my shirt from my locker.”

JJ’s eyes went wide and I could see his entire body go tense beside me. “You didn’t tell me that.” I looked at him for a brief second without responding.

I didn’t tell him because I knew how he could get. The pogues were all over protective of me and although I appreciated the sentiment, I could handle my own. If the girl wanted to pull some grade school prank on me, so be it. I didn’t need my brother and our friends to come to my aid every time something happened.

Before I could even attempt to elaborate further, Mr.Carrera was calling over for two of us to go help him put stuff in the back so he could lock up. John B and Pope practically jumped from their seats, Pope wanting to get on the older man’s good side, totally not because of his crush on Kiara, while John B just wanted to get more food.

My attention was pulled from the two fools racing towards the front of the restaurant when a warm, firm hand landed on my shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I just shrugged sheepishly. “So you could get in trouble with me? You don’t have too many chances left with the law yourself, blondie.” He remained silent, knowing I was right and he would’ve encouraged my behaviors instead of trying to stop them. It was the dynamic we had. Partners in crime, if that’s how’d you like to describe it. We backed one another. I was closer to JJ than anyone in the group, sometimes even my own brother.

“Just…” He sighed, his hand dropping from my shoulder to my thigh in, what seemed to be, a subconscious movement. “Just tell me the truth from now on. Can’t be the Robin to your Batman if I’m not in the loop.”

I rolled my eyes and laughed shortly at his cheesy and childish analogy. “I’m totally the Robin to your Batman, though. I just go AWOL from time to time. For the thrill of it, y’know?” I joked.

We laughed with one another before letting it fade into a comfortable silence, his thumb rubbing my thigh mindlessly.

Okay, so I may have downplayed the dynamic between JJ and I. I’d be a fool to deny the tension. I’d had a crush on him for years but he was Pope’s best friend and I always had the presumption that he was off limits in that sense. But in recent years, it seemed that JJ had started to feel the same for me.

He liked me. I knew he did. But I didn’t mind because I liked him, too. More than I knew I should.

I don’t know what gave me the confidence to make such a claim. Maybe it was the way I would catch him staring at me from time to time and even when I made eye contact and he wouldn’t look away. Or maybe it was the fleeting touches that walked the fine-line between friendly and romantic, similar to the way he was touching my thigh now.

All I knew was that somewhere down the line, the wall between friendship and something more than that had started to fall for us. I was no longer Pope’s little sister than he hung out with because Pope brought me along. I was Y/n — his best friend, his partner in crime.

I was too lost in my thoughts to realize that his hand was inching further up my thigh and his entire body grew closer, my eyes flickering down to his lips. Is JJ about to kiss me?

“Guys?” Kiara piped up, making her presence known once again. Too caught up in our conversation, we had completely disregarded the third person still sitting at the table. JJ immediately straightened himself out before removing his hand from my leg, leaving a cool sensation in its place. “I don’t know what I just saw. Or what I was about to see. But Pope is less than ten feet away…” She said cautiously, eyeing the both of us skeptically. “Is there something I should be aware of?”

“I thought there was something in her eye, Kie. Chill.”

She threw her hands up briefly in surrender, but not before raising a curious brow at the both of us. Quiet and flustered, the moment was now gone and replaced with a heavy awkwardness.

IT’D BEEN A DAY SINCE MY ALMOST-KISS WITH JJ. Kie tried to press me about it after we’d left The Wreck but, surprisingly, I’d convinced her to drop it. That didn’t stop her from shooting me suspicious glances anytime JJ and I were together.

John B had thrown a kegger and I was currently nursing my cup, filled with whatever concoction he had thrown into the keg tonight. I was hot and flustered from dancing with Kie and Sarah for practically half the night, leaning against the trunk of a tree near the shore. The breeze brought a welcomed chill over my warm skin.

My eyes scanned over the party-goers, not looking for anyone in particular yet, my eyes seemed to find him as they always do. Across the beach, JJ was in a stance similar to mine. Back against a tree except there was a joint his hand, lifting it up every now and then to take a hit. His eyes scanned the beach like mine had previously.

When his blue eyes landed on mine, I sent him a smile and barely took a step, with the intention to join him, before a big, brawny frame was blocking almost my entire view of the beach.

“Hey, pretty girl.” The guy drawled. He didn’t seem drunk but his ego alone was enough to nauseate me.

I attempted to side step him, only to have my view blocked again. Huffing harshly and rolling my eyes, I looked up at the guy. He was creepy, and that was me being polite. He had this unsettling smirk and some kind of stupid, preppy, figure-eight ass haircut that swayed me all the wrong ways.

“Do you need something?” I sassed, crossing my arms with my cup still in hand.

“There are a whole lot of things I need and you are one of them.” Ew. Ew ew ew. I couldn’t stop myself from visibly cringing at this guy's lame and unwanted advances. I just wanted to go talk to JJ.

“Well, then you’ll just have to cope. 'Scuse me.” I dismissed him with a tight-lipped smile, not sparing him another glance. I attempted to walk around him only for him to follow my every step. I was growing more and more agitated at this point. This guy had seconds, at best, before I showed him just how uninterested and unamused I was by his antics.

“C’mon, little lady. I can show you a real good time.” He trailed off, his eyes traveling down my body without a trace of shame, stopping at my semi-exposed cleavage. My eyes caught sight of his hands coming up and reaching out for my waist.

I bit the inside of my cheek before tossing my cup to the sand — Kie could kill me later. When his hands hit my waist, I slid my arms over his shoulders as his lustful gaze shifted to mine. I gave him a sickly sweet smile before bringing the boy closer and kneeing him in the crotch.

He soon retracted from me, doubling over in pain with a deep groan. Bending down to level my lips with his ear, I whispered. “Next time, get out of my fucking way.”

I stood to my full height before walking off, hearing the guy call out behind me.

“Bitch!”

“Your mother!” I called over my shoulder, straightening out my top.

My eyes scanned the crowd, which had seemed to grow more dense in the moments I was distracted, looking for JJ.

But when I spotted him, he wasn’t alone. He was leading some girl to The Chateau, holding her hand as he guided her up the steps. I felt a sharp pang in my chest before turning around to get my eyes off the scene before me, refusing to cry in the middle of a party. There was only one reason why he would be taking her up there. I wasn’t stupid. But I also wasn’t going to have a shitty night because the guy I liked left with another girl and some asshole wouldn’t leave me alone.

So, spotting Sarah and Kiara chatting with John B and my brother, I made my way over to my group of remaining friends and continued my night as normally as possible.

JJ’s actions only serving as a harsh reminder of why we would never work out. Why we couldn’t.

THE FOLLOWING DAY, AFTER THE KEGGER, WAS NORMAL AS ONE WOULD EXPECT. Although, the thought of JJ with that girl had crossed my mind practically all day, as much as I hate to admit it. I knew he’d slept with her. It’s JJ. He wasn’t exactly celibate, in any sense of the word.

Despite my racing thoughts, the school day had ended and my dear brother had waited until the last minute to text me that he left early to help our father with catering and couldn’t pick me up. I sighed, throwing my head back as my shoulders slumped. I shook myself off before dialing my mother.

Unsurprisingly, I was met with her voicemail after a full two rings and a text following right after.

Busy. Can’t talk.

Per usual. Our mom was there but she was never really present. Always working or on business trips. She was in and then she was out. Sometimes I wondered if she even remembered that she had kids that still needed her.

Nevertheless, I knew Kie had a shift at The Wreck right after school and I had already seen John B and Sarah run off as soon as the dismissal bell rang — leaving me with only one option.

Scrolling to find the contact that stuck out, I hesitated slightly before pressing ‘call’, my nerves jumping as the phone barely rang before the click of the line being picked up was heard.

“Y/n? What’s up? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, JJ, I’m fine. Are you busy?”

“Uh…”

…

“JJ?”

“Never too busy for you. Why?”

His uncertainty through the phone had me uneasy but I ignored it. “Pope left early and I need a ride. Would you mind?”

I could hear mutters and shuffling over the line. “No, it's cool. I’ll be there soon. Stand in front of the school. Be there in 10. Okay?”

“Okay.” And with that the call ended.

And just as he said, ten minutes later and the distinct rev and rumble of his beat up truck was heard as it pulled up to the front of the school. I smiled brightly but it soon faded when I got a full view of the scene in front of me.

In the passenger seat of his truck was the girl that I’m pretty sure I saw him disappear with last night. Her hair was a mess and she looked like she barely had time to wipe the remnants of her makeup off of her face.

I felt an unfamiliar feeling bubble in my gut — jealousy mixed in with…something else. It wasn’t that I was threatened by her presence or anything. JJ had slept with many girls before her. But I had never had to face any of them. Certainly none that... reminded me oddly of myself?

It was like looking into a warped mirror. I didn’t notice I was still standing on the curb until JJ piped up. “Yo, Y/n?” He seemed hesitant, as if he knew his error. I’m sure he did. “Hop in, kiddo.”

I raised a brow at him with an incredulous expression. “Kiddo?” I spat. Kiddo? What the fuck?

His face pleaded with me to just get in the car and I did but not before rolling my eyes and giving the girl in my unofficial seat a small glare. Maybe she noticed, maybe she didn’t. I didn’t care.

The ride was tense and silent, dreadful really. Mine and JJ’s eyes meeting in the rearview mirror every 5 minutes, exchanging wordless glances. The girl shifted awkwardly in her seat, speaking every few minutes to tell JJ where to turn.

We ended up in front of some huge house on Figure Eight. The girl hopped out, not quick enough for me, and shot JJ a shy smile. I couldn’t stop myself from audibly gagging in the backseat and muttering to myself, both of them shooting completely different looks at me.

Once the door was shut and JJ was changing gears to pull off, I climbed over the center console to sit in my seat — the one that was now oddly warm and felt tainted. Was I being dramatic? Yes. Did I care? Not nearly enough.

It was unusually silent during the ride back. I only spoke once and that was to tell him that he could take me back to The Chateau, since being home alone was something I hated.

However, I broke the ice when it became unbearable. “Is that why you weren’t at school today? Screwing some kook you picked up at the party?” I spoke, not even attempting to hide the malice in my tone.

He sighed, glancing at me as I stared out the window watching the houses and trees pass by. “Her name is Angela.”

“Angela.” I mocked in a disgusted tone. “I didn’t ask for her name.” I reminded harshly, snapping to face him, his focus on the road. His visual focus anyway, it was clear to see he was hanging onto my every word. “I asked if she was the reason you bailed on school today. But I think I’ve got my answer.”

IT HAD ONLY BEEN A FEW HOURS SINCE JJ PICKED ME UP FROM SCHOOL WITH HIS RECENT RENDEZVOUS IN THE CAR. I had gone home as soon as Pope had texted me that he and my dad were back home, wanting to escape the awkwardness of being with JJ alone in The Chateau after our odd exchange in the car.

The only thing that made this worse is that we were headed back there now because I forgot it was Friday and John B planned a movie night. Even though he always talked through them while we all told him to shut up, they were one of our favorite ways to hang out. Especially during the weekends where we could doze off in his living room and wake up to head down to the beach.

Walking up the porch of The Chateau, I could hear a couple of voices inside. Pope and I didn’t knock, instead walking in knowing the door would be unlocked.

When we walked in, I immediately rolled my eyes and muttered under my breath. I hadn’t realized how loud my moan of vexation was in that moment, my brother turning to me as his expression turned into one of worried confusion.

“You okay?”

Shifting my gaze to his instead of the three people in front of me, I locked eyes with Pope. “'M fine. Just wasn’t expecting her to be here.” I spoke lowly, throwing my head in the direction of the girl I saw earlier as she stood talking in the kitchen with JJ. Don’t tell me he invited her here. A kook he met less than 24 hours ago?

“What, you know her?” Pope asked quizzically, probably sensing the frustration radiating off of me.

“You could say that.” Was all I replied before walking further into The Chateau, making my brother and I’s presence fully known.

“Yo!” John B hollered excitedly as he stood in front of one of the only TV’s in his home, crouching as he looked for a movie to watch. “Surprised you’re on time, Pope. Considering that one is with you.” The brunette boy jested.

I walked over to him, a playful smile on my face, before gently swiping one of his crouched feet from under him causing him to slip on his ass with an audible but not seemingly painful thump.

He huffed harshly, rolled his eyes and glared up at me. “And you wonder why I bother you.” He uttered, plucking my calf.

“You started it.” I shrugged with a smug smile. John B just mocked me in a high pitched, borderline unintelligible voice that made my face scrunch and tell him that I do not sound like that before walking off. It was all jokes, though. John B was like my second brother. However, unlike Pope, he couldn’t go 5 minutes without teasing me. I think he liked how much more immature he could be around me sometimes.

Taking my time to stroll over to the kitchen and lean against the counter of the kitchen, JJ, who had been oddly silent and not greeting me with a bear hug as he normally would, wasted no time in lifting his stare to meet mine.

It looked like he and his honorary movie night invitee were preparing a bowl of popcorn and drinks.

“Hey.” I said, jutting my head up in a small greeting as I leaned my elbows against the rough surface of the counter.

But JJ didn’t have time to reply before the girl was answering in a cheery tone, her demeanor and personality doing a complete 180 from what I saw just hours ago. “Hi!” She squealed. “I’m Angela. We met earlier?” She asked as if it was a real question, obviously knowing it was me she had seen in her less than put together state in my seat- the passenger seat of JJ’s truck.

She began to round the corner to get closer to me, dusting her hands off against each other, until she was mere inches in front of me. I moved to lean off of the counter with an odd expression etched all over my face. I wasn’t a fan of new, and frankly uninvited, people — especially kooks.

But having a closer look at Angela now, I could see now that she wasn’t just some kook. No, she was some kook that I’d seen around school tormenting all the pogues in her grade. Despite being a kook, she went to Kildare High with the rest of us. And I was 90 percent sure she ran in the posse run by the girl who tried to punk me during gym that later landed me in a holding cell.

So this little miss perfect, happy go lucky act that she was bombarding me with suddenly filled my entire being with disgust. I couldn’t hide the unamused and rather uninviting expression in my face.

And I wasn’t just treating this girl this way because she had slept with the guy I had a thing for. My best friend. She just stuck around too long for my liking. I’m actually friends with one or two of the girls JJ has had a night with. How? I couldn’t tell you. It just happened. But Angela here swayed me the wrong way the second I saw her. Maybe it was my gut all along, trying to stir up the exact memory that I hadn’t exactly committed but suddenly made itself known again.

I was stuck in my head but was quickly pulled out of it when I saw she was going in for a hug. Before I could stop her she was encasing me in her arms. It didn’t last long before I was shimmying the girl off of me.

She hesitantly let me go, her hands still resting on my shoulders which I swiftly brushed off. I shrugged and sent her an effortless, half-assed smile. “Not much of a hugger.”

I could see JJ tilt his head and speak before he could think. “Since when?”

My annoyed gaze snapped to his in an instant, my face contorting in mild anger. “Since you started trying to integrate your one-night stands into our friend group.” All three of us went silent. John B and Pope too caught up in their own conversation to even hear ours. I could hear Angela scoff and saw her retreat back around the counter to stand next to JJ.

“Y/n.” He said firmly, not knowing where this sudden agitation came from.

I chuckled bitterly before running both of my hands down my face. “I’m gonna get some air.” I muttered, leaving the two of them behind me as I walked by John B and Pope.

“Where are you going?” Pope piped up inquisitively.

“Outside.” Was all I said as I stepped foot onto the back porch, the flimsy door making a loud noise as it shut behind me.

I sat myself down on the steps of the wooden platform, my legs stretched out in front of me crossed over one another as I let my thoughts wander.

I don’t even know why I’m so worked up about this. Technically, I just assumed JJ liked me. He never said he did but all of the signs were there. And yeah, I get that I’m at fault too but this is so hard to manage. I know why I haven’t acted on anything.

I don’t want to jeopardize my relationship with my brother. Pope always had a hard time making friends and the pogues were like our home away from home. They’d stuck by us through thick and thin and I didn’t want to complicate that, for him or myself. And beginning something with JJ? Well, that was a sure-fire way to complicate things.

But in protecting my brother I was hurting myself. As conceited as it may sound, I knew if I said the word that JJ would be with me. Same with me, if I’m being honest with myself. All he had to do was say that he wanted me and he could have me.

But now, I’m not so certain. With him bringing this girl around, one who reminds me eerily of myself? I hate it. I hate the way it makes me feel. And maybe I was being a bitch to her because I knew she wasn’t half the saint she was pretending to be. But most of it was the fact that we were so similar, yet JJ was fooling around with her.

It was making me, truthfully, see some insecurities in myself. Trying to pinpoint what was so drastically different between us that he picked her in one night. What was she displaying that I lacked? And for me, someone who found themselves to be relatively self-assured and confident, it was a hard pill to swallow.

I wasn’t stupid. I knew he picked her because she reminded him of me in some sense. But as I said previously, if JJ wanted me he could have me. Not some weird ass, carbon copy of me. Was he as scared as I was? Of hurting Pope? Was this his way of finding some kind of loophole around that? And if it was…was it working?

Suddenly, I heard the front door of The Chateau close. The cheery, unmistakable voices of Kiara and Sarah booming. A small smile came to my face as I took a deep breath and stood up to head inside.

And it seemed I had re-entered the home at just the right time, seeing Kie squeal my name and run up to Angela, bear hugging the girl from behind with her hands around her neck.

And, honestly, I had noticed before but when you couldn’t see her face, even I thought she was me. Angela had her back turned as she poured the drink into the glass, Kie making her spill it slightly on the counter. I could see JJ try to reach his hand out and warm the cheerful girl but it was too late.

“What the hell?!” Angela screeched, slamming the can down and turning as she pushed Kie off of her. Angela had soda on her top and was eyeing Kiara with a death glare.

“I thought you were…” Kie trailed, her eyes searching for me before they found me standing at the door in the back of the house watching this whole thing unfold as the house fell relatively silent.

She stared at me briefly before whipping back to the fuming, soda-covered girl in the kitchen. “Who are you?” Kie asked with her eyebrows furrowed, A stunned Sarah standing right behind her, mouth slightly agape and eyebrows raised, holding a bag full of candy and chips.

“I’m JJ’s girlfriend. Who the hell are you?” Angela spat back and JJ’s eyes went wide, I mean extremely wide. He suddenly put his hands up and backed away from the girl as if she had burned him, shaking his head.

“Woah, woah,” He looked around to gauge our reactions, that’s when he caught sight of me by the door. It almost seemed like he was speaking to me, and me only, when he opened his mouth again. “She is not my girlfriend.”

Angela swiftly redirected her fiery gaze from Kiara to JJ. “Oh, I’m not? After you slept with me and drove me home?”

JJ looked utterly confused, as did the rest of us. He lowered his eyes to look at the girl. “You asked if I could take you home. I could, so I did. Doesn’t make you my girlfriend.”

“Then why did you invite me here?” She spoke defensively.

“I didn’t…” He trailed off frustratedly. “You caught me at the gas station when I was picking up the sodas, asked where I was going and when I told you, you hopped in my truck and said ‘count me in’. I didn’t invite you here, you invited yourself.” He explained. “I didn't wanna be an asshole and turn you down. I honestly had no intentions of ever seeing you again.”

This elicited a laugh from John B that he quickly covered up with a cough when Angela looked at him. She laughed bitterly. “Y’know what…” She muttered, snatching her purse and phone off of the counter. “That’s fine by me. I don’t know what I was thinking coming to this shit hole on this side of town anyway. Hope you pathetic ass losers have fun watching your little movie.” She quarreled.

“Will do.” I shot back at her with a lazy, two-finger, mock salute that came off as more of a wave and a smug smile, her gaze whipping to mine as she curled her lip and elicited a sound of disgust. She swiftly walked out the front door without another glance back, making an effort to slam the door behind her that had John B calling out in desperation.

“Could you be careful? I just fixed the hinges!”

With Angela gone, along with her brewing storm of rage, the house was still.

“Well,” Sarah spoke, shaking the bag of goods in her hand for us to see. “show's over. Can we start the movie?

The room broke into an infectious laughter as we grabbed our snacks, drinks, and rushed to the couch to start our marathon.

I DON’T REMEMBER WHEN WE ALL FELL ASLEEP. All I knew was that I woke up, my head on Kie’s lap and her head on Pope’s shoulder. John B and Sarah entwined with one another, so much so that you couldn’t tell where he started and she ended.

Sitting up slowly with a quiet groan, I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. The sun seemed to have risen not too long ago, casting an orange hue over the sleeping figures in the living room.

Though, one of them was missing.

It wasn’t even seconds before my sore eyes spotted him across The Chateau, in the kitchen, hunched over the counter with his elbows on top of the surface, head in his hands with a glass of water next to him.

Standing from the couch, my sock-clad feet made a soft pattering noise as I made my way over to him. The tired blonde looked up from his hands when he sensed my shadow looming over him, me leaning my own elbows against the counter as I stood across from him on the opposite side.

“Mornin’, blondie.” I chirped, although my voice was still mildly raspy.

“Don’t start.” He spoke exhaustedly.

“What d’you mean?”

“Don’t bring up what went down last night.” He demanded in a tired tone. His gaze shifted to look me in the eyes directly. “I can see it in your mischievous little eyes. I don’t wanna hear it.”

I sighed over-dramatically and stretched my hands out across the counter-top. “Well,” I drawled. “When you are ready to talk, and by talk I mean finally admit that you’ve harbored an enormous crush on me for years, then I’ll be outside.” I saw his eyes go wide and flicker to the sleeping figures on the sofa, specifically Pope’s. “It’s your move, blondie.”

And with that, I was making my way out of the kitchen area and through the back door of The Chateau.

IT WASN’T LONG UNTIL THE SOUND OF THE CREAKY SCREEN DOOR SHUTTING WAS HEARD BEHIND ME AS I SAT ON THE STEPS OF THE PORCH. It could’ve only been a mere 5 minutes after my vague bomb-drop in the kitchen with JJ.

The Outer Banks breeze hit me almost immediately after I walked out of the door and I plopped myself down on the worn, wooden steps without caution as I waited. And it wasn't long before my waiting was over.

I caught sight of the sleeveless tank and ruffled, blonde hair as he sat down next to me. A small smile made its way onto my face, for a reason I simply could not explain. It wasn’t long before I spoke, not wanting to waste time.

“I’ll admit, I was confused at first.” I started, looking ahead at the beach in front of me. “I thought we had something. A little brother’s best-friend, forbidden romance, will-they-won't-they type thing goin’ on, y’know?”

At this he snorted. “You’re ridiculous, y’know that?” He joked, side-eyeing me with a small smile.

“But then,” I dragged, dipping my head to the side to look at him. “You fell back into a terrible habit. That habit being using sex to distract yourself from your life problems.” I spoke honestly. Bluntly. I saw his smile fall slightly at my veracity. “But something was different. I just hadn’t connected the pieces yet. But what stuck out the most was your choice of hook up. She seemed familiar. Too familiar.”

I paused, letting him catch up to what I was hinting at.

“She reminded me of myself. Physically, anyway.” I shrugged. “Now, call me overly-confident, whatever — but you chose the worst replacement ever-” I began with a cringe.

“Oh my god-” He groaned, running his hands down his face with a low chuckle. “Really? That’s where your head’s at? Seriously-”

“Uh, yeah, seriously.” I started, an astonished expression plastered on my features. “She was a bitch. And she only really looked like me when you couldn’t see her face.” I muttered in mock-offense, that was somewhat authentic.

We laughed for a beat before letting it fall into silence, replaced by the sound of the water hitting the shore from afar and the wind whipping by.

“So, what now? You basically told me everything that I could've said. Why did you want to talk out here?” He asked casually, trying to hide his nerves that shone through his leg that was bouncing furiously. I put my hand on his knee gently to halt the rapid movement.

“It’s simple, really,” I started, a hint of roguery behind my eyes. “I want to hear it from you. All of it.” I declared.

His eyes scanned mine, going from one to the other to assess my seriousness — more so, if I was in fact asking him to admit how he felt about me. When, I assume, he found no trace of humor or trickery, he took a deep breath and looked out in front of him.

And although I wouldn’t let it show on my features, my heart was racing furiously behind my chest. I could hear it.

“You’re... right. For the most part, anyway.” He kicked off his statement. “I’ve had a thing for you for a while now. It started as a small crush, I thought you were cute and feisty and we got along. I thought it would go away because all crushes do, or at least that’s what I thought. So when a year passed and nothing had changed, I knew I was in for it.”

He paused to pace himself, looking down at the hand I had yet to remove from his knee and placing his own on top of it.

“It was my freshman year when Pope caught me staring at you a little too hard, giving me the typical ‘gross, that’s my sister’ spill.” He mocked, prompting both of us to chuckle. “Then, John B made the stupid ‘no pogue-on-pogue macking’ rule and it seemed like the world was working against me. And when it came to thought of us alone, no rules or brothers in mind, I just thought we were too…different.” He said with a frown.

“I had a random hook-up every weekend, chicks coming up asking if I remembered them or even their names and you were always on about how all you wanted was one person who would stick with you through anything and I just thought that I couldn’t be that for you. So, I told myself that I’d let you go, or try to. But it was so much harder than I thought it would be. There’s nothing you could do that could make me stop loving you, and I realized that. Angela…was a mistake, to say the least. She was the closest thing I could find to you without her being you and that wasn’t nearly enough. She looked a little bit like you, sure, but she was selfish, rude as fuck, and she did not think I was funny, like at all. Kinda hurt my ego, not gonna lie.” He joked.

“I’m in love with you. And I should’ve said it sooner.” He spoke gently, finally meeting my eyes with his own. They were shining with vulnerability, a rare form of it I had never seen from him.

I didn’t know what to say. I had coaxed this long, honest confession out of him and was too stunned to speak. Although, I had a few words on the tip of my tongue. “I love you, too.”

It was so much of a whisper I barely heard it myself. But the second a bright grin broke out on his face, I knew he’d heard it. And before I could process his actions, his lips were against mine in an instant.

I was about to kiss him back but the logical side of me pushed him away before I could. My hands on his shoulders with my eyes blown wide. “We can’t. Pope, he's…this isn’t-”

His hands pulled mine from his shoulder so he could hold them. “Pope will be fine. I know he’s your brother, he’s my best friend, but you have to make a choice for you.” He reassured me firmly.

I was silent, looking into his eyes as I weighed my options. Although, I knew there was only one I was going to choose.

Pope would get over it.

I took JJ off guard when I crashed my lips into his this time. His hands coming up to cradle both sides of my face as my own trailed up the length of his chest. I could feel him smile smally into the kiss before he murmured something between us. “Good choice.”

There was nothing else in that moment, except us.

And the random camera shutter we both seemed to have heard as we pulled away with confused expressions and swollen lips. Looking over towards the door, there stood a grinning Kiara and Sarah leaning against the door frame. Kiara’s phone in her hand, held up landscape-style as we caught sight of it just as the flash went out.

Her eyebrows rose and she threw out a hand towards us. “Oh, by all means, please continue. I just needed a photo for the scrapbook I’m making for your wedding where I'm obviously gonna be your maid of honor.” She smiled sweetly with a wink before turning on her heels and going back inside.

Sarah shrugged with a smile and pointed a finger, wiggling it between the both of us. “I did not see this coming, at all, by the way.” She claimed before squinting her eyes playfully. “But I kind of like it. Okay, I’m leaving now.” She said before following Kiara inside.

I sighed harshly as JJ tried to hold in a laugh. “It’s not funny.” I reprimanded, although my expression was full of humor itself.

JJ slid his arm across my shoulders to tug me into him, kissing the top of my forehead.

“Oh and small warning,” I started, looking up at him. “You let another person, girl or guy, sit in my seat in your truck again or call me 'kiddo'? I’ll demolish it in the worst way you've ever seen. I'm talking 'Before He Cheats' style and then some.” I spoke threateningly with a smile on my face.

“Noted.” He smiled adoringly, even though I had just threatened to utterly decimate his vehicle. I rolled my eyes at him but snuggled closer into his side as we sat in comfortable silence.

“JJ WHY DOES KIE HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU KISSING MY SISTER?!” Pope’s voice boomed from all the way inside the home, his heavy and rapid footsteps approaching the door causing JJ to jump from his place beside me and nearly tumble down the steps as he skipped down them.

When Pope came outside he looked at me. Sitting on the steps, unbothered for the most part but a hint of amusement that he could only spot in my face. “You kissed him?!” He asked as if he couldn’t believe it. But in all honesty? He didn’t even look upset, not really.

I was one-hundred percent sure he was just trying to be a protective older brother.

Then his gaze whipped to JJ who looked apprehensive. “You kissed my sister?”

JJ put a hand on top of his head to act as a shield from the sun as he looked around. “It’s really nice outside. We should surf today. And the water? Oh man, the water looks amazing.” He tried to deflect in a ramble.

Then Pope was bolting down the stairs as JJ ran off, both of them kicking up sand in their wake. “I’m gonna kill you and her next!”

At that, my brows furrowed and I stood from the steps to lean over the railing and watch them run around like chickens. “Why me?!” I called in offense, throwing my hands out. A smile breaking out when Pope tackled JJ to the ground and they wrestled before breaking out into a fit of giggles themselves.

General taglist;@livlaughquinn

JJ Maybank Taglist; @ronnieissupermegafoxyawesomehot @maybankslover

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading.

©loveharlow

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thepsychewrites · 2 years

Text

Little Dove Pt. 3 | S. Rogers

You could never disappoint me…

Steve Rogers x F!Reader

Summary: Steve finally brings you to his house for dinner. How will he react when things take a turn and some truths come out?

Warnings: 18+ only ; MDNI ; Age gap, Sorta smutty, heavy makeout sessions, some light angst/anxiety, soft!Steve, power imbalance, and language.

Word Count: 3.7k

Author’s Note: GUYS GUYS GUYS OKAY- I’m so so so sorry for the delay in part 3, life has been so fucking hectic and messy these last few weeks, but alas the time has come. Also, I apologize for the cliff hangar- but this bitch was nearing 4k words and I just had to stop it where I did otherwise it would’ve been nearing 7 or 8k by the time I was done!! But believe me when I say I won’t leave you guys hanging for long 😚😚 Anyway, as always, enjoy whores!!

Main Masterlist

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Expectations.

God, they fueled your anxiety like no other.

Was Steve planning for more than just dinner tomorrow? Did he want to have sex already? How many times has he had sex? What if he was secretly married? Was he aware that you’ve never had sex? Was it too early to have sex? I mean come on, it's only the first date… Would there be any more dates? Did this even count as a date?

“You need to stop thinking so hard about it.” Yelena’s voice broke out in the foggy bathroom, filtering in past the shower curtains from her spot on the floor. “Seriously- I can tell it’s driving you mad.”

Shampoo was racing down your forehead, your eyes squeezed shut as you rinsed it from your hair. “I know I know, but… I can't stop thinking about it, Lena. I’ve never been in any sort of relationship before and I have no idea what to expect… I don’t know if I’m ready for it all yet.” You confessed, your fingers slowing their pace against your scalp. “All I know is that I really like him, and I don’t want to screw it up.”

Yelena was seated on the floor, her back and head resting against the sink cabinet as she faced towards the wall to allow you some privacy. “Just be honest with him, Y/n. If it starts going in a direction you don’t like, tell him. If he likes you like you say he does, he’ll respect it. And if not… then you call me and I’ll deal with him.” She turned her attention to her neglected nail beds, picking at them lazily. “I wish you would tell me who it is so I could run a background check on him...” She added in a mumble.

“And that is exactly why I will not be telling you who it is.” You shook your head at her antics, loving her even more for it.

Yelena was one of those heaven-sent people that only got put in your life if you were really lucky. She carried an energy that can only be described as Yelena. A fiery, juvenile, smart-ass, protective as all hell, intelligent, loving angel she was. The two of you met a week before your freshman year at one of the welcome seminars your college held for first year students. Low and behold, she ended up being your roommate that year too. She was practically your sister, the both of you sharing an indescribable bond that you wouldn’t trade for the world.

“You missed a spot.” Yelena chuckled, twisting her back and pointing to the slope of her butt. “You’ll thank me later for not letting you prance over there with the ass of king-kong.” She blew a kiss your way, pairing it with a teasing wink.

Maybe you’d take a second thought about the trade.

“I hate you.” You said with the most serious voice you could muster, running your razor along the missed spots of hair.

Yelena hummed. “Sure you do. Now hurry up, Dateline comes on in fifteen.”

——

Steve was a nervous wreck.

It’s why he put on a documentary for the entirety of class on Friday instead of giving his usual lecture. It’s why he retreated back to his office when it started playing, only keeping the door ajar slightly in case of emergency, so he could conceal the fact that he was panicking. He nearly refused to look at you when you walked in, but your gentle smile and sparkling eyes made his walls crumble completely. Steve couldn’t stare for too long though, because his heart rate kept climbing and he didn’t want to have a heart attack on campus today, let alone have the cause of it be a student.

You paid absolutely no mind to the film as it played on, your fluttering heart matching that of Steve’s, who sat quietly in his office during the entire class. Instead, you focused on how the evening might play out.

You thought about what Steve would be wearing when he came to pick you up later. Would he be wearing his usual teaching attire? Or would he allow himself to be more relaxed? You thought about what his house might look like. But what if he didn’t own a house? An apartment would be fine too. What if you saw pictures of another woman hanging along a photo wall, her beauty far surpassing yours? No, that’s silly- Steve would be smart enough to put those away, wouldn’t he? You thought about if his cooking was decent, and if he was sticking to the pasta he talked about on Wednesday. You thought about what movie he would want to watch and how his couch would feel under your thighs. You thought about how Steve would touch you again, his hands trailing far too close to where they shouldn’t go. What if he wanted to take it somewhere new? Would it be such a bad thing? Would his touch be rough and needy like it was in his car? Would he want you to stay the night, sleeping in his bed next to him until the sun came up? Would he ask you to stay a little longer? Would you agree?

Yelena was right. You need to stop thinking so hard about this. It’s just dinner at Steve’s house. Nothing more, nothing less.

Right?

Steve’s train of thought was no better. He wanted to make the night so special for you, but a simple dinner at his house wasn’t going to do him much justice. Did you even like chicken fettuccine alfredo? What if being at his house scared you and you wanted to go home? What if he overstepped too early? What if he wanted to feel your skin under his touch again, would you let him? Would you judge the way his house was furnished? Would you want to stay the night? Would you care to get to know him at all, or did you just want to sleep with him? Did you have a boyfriend he wasn’t aware of?

Steve pulled out his phone, fingers shaking as he typed out a text.

I don’t know if I can do it. Should I tell her something came up?

No less than thirty seconds later, a response came back, his best friend's name attached to the message.

No way in hell, punk. It’ll be fine, just remember what I told you.

Steve rolled his eyes.

Yeah, yeah, don’t be creepy, I’m aware of that, Buck. But… do you think it’s too soon?

Another ding.

Stevie, it’s been almost five years. You’ve got to move on and start living again, it’s what she would want.

And another.

You’re not canceling on this mystery girl of yours, end of story.

Maybe Bucky was right. Steve shouldn’t cancel on you just because he’s been out of the game for so long.

Right?

——

Looking at the clock for the fifth time in under a minute did nothing to calm you.

It was seven o’clock on the dot and Steve hadn’t texted you yet.

Was this his way of canceling? Did something happen on his way here? Did he get into an accident? What if-

A low buzz made your heart jump, your phone alerting you of an incoming message.

I’m outside. Same spot as Wednesday.

You couldn’t tell if his text relieved you or made your stomach churn. With a deep inhale and even longer exhale, you grabbed your bag and made your way outside.

The two of you didn’t talk much after class today besides Steve asking for your number so he could let you know when he was there to pick you up. After that, he was quick to send you a tight lipped smile and retreat back into his office, closing the door behind him.

Stepping out of your residence hall and into the evening sunlight, your eyes landed on Steve’s car almost immediately, pointing your body in that direction and letting your legs carry you there. You kept your gaze down, thinking that if you locked eyes with him now you might panic and turn back.

But he couldn’t stop staring at you.

You were wearing the prettiest little dress he had ever seen- a light blue that stopped halfway down your thighs with short flowy sleeves and miniature white polka dots littered throughout. Steve was practically drooling into his lap as he watched you walk to his car, only regaining his composure to step out and open the passenger side door for you.

“You look absolutely amazing, Y/n.” Steve said when you were within earshot, shaking his head in disbelief that he was about to spend the evening with you. He watched a blush creep onto your face, his eyes never leaving you once.

He was sporting tight black jeans and a deep red long-sleeve shirt, doused with his favorite cologne that made him smell insatiable. Once you finally looked at him, you couldn’t stop. Steve’s smile was contagious, making your lips pull up to match his as you stepped around him to slide into the car. “Says you.” You teased, adjusting in your seat, the door staying open for a second so Steve could ensure you were in all the way before gently closing it.

Steve moved around the back of the car, finally getting to his door and hopping in. “I mean it. You look beautiful.” His voice was light, yet stern, as he put the car in drive and pulled away from the parking lot, his large hand landing softly on your exposed thigh.

It was hard to think straight with his thumb stroking across your skin, goosebumps nearly rising at his touch. “Thank you.” Was all you could muster. With some extra courage you allowed your fingers to trace along his extended forearm, dancing across the fabric of his shirt as you leaned back comfortably in the seat.

The car ride to his house was silent, but not awkward. Quiet jazz music from decades past filled the air and you enjoyed the view, both from outside and from the man next to you. Less than ten minutes later you were pulling into a charming and affluent neighborhood in the historic district of town. The houses here were large and rather spread apart, the lawns perfectly manicured and the street filled with expensive cars. Lots of green trees lined the road, the occasional lit lamp post poking out between them. Steve’s car came to a stop in front of a gorgeous, two story red brick home, black trimming and windows making it stand out from the rest.

Steve turned off the engine and stepped out, grinning to himself as he watched you, your eyes transfixed on the house and your mouth slightly open. Your attention turned on him as the door popped open, Steve’s hand held out for you.

“You live here?” You asked as you took his hand, stepping up onto the grassy curb. “It’s gorgeous, Steve.”

He bent down and grabbed your bag, holding it in one hand and your hand in the other as he led you to the door. “I know. I got pretty lucky with the price and couldn’t pass it down.” His fingers twisted a key into the lock before the door opened, granting you a view into Steve’s home.

It was breathtakingly him, to say the least. Antique fixtures and stunning furniture pieces scattered throughout, the walls dark- yet filled with life. A few plants thrived by the large bay window in the living room, the space filled with warm orange light from a lamp nestled in the corner. It smelled faintly of pumpkin and cinnamon, too. An elegant staircase on the right led to the upstairs, while the foyer opened into the living room to the left and the kitchen straight ahead. The same soft jazz that played in the car floated throughout the house, coming from somewhere in the living room, barely heard unless you listened for it.

“Are you hungry? Dinner is almost ready, just gotta throw the pasta on.” Steve called, his hand squeezing down on yours as he slowly led you to the kitchen.

“Mhm.” You hummed, too enthralled in everything Steve to say anything more. He chuckled at you, a lazy grin never leaving his face. As soon as you entered the kitchen, you knew you’d never want to leave. “God, it smells amazing in here, Steve.” The wide island in the center of the kitchen was sprinkled with flour, two golden loaves of ciabatta laying in a wooden bowl on the side. “Did you make those yourself?” You asked, pointing to the fresh pieces of bread.

Steve nodded, his face turning a light shade of pink. “Yeah, I uh- I like to cook quite a bit…” He trailed off. “Helps when I’ve got someone to cook for.” He added, glancing down at you for a second. His hand squeezed down once more before he spoke again. “Do you like wine?”

“When the occasion calls for it.” You answered, a knowing smile on your face.

He raised his brows, his touch fading as he moved towards one of the kitchen cabinets. He squatted down, opening the cabinet to reveal a wine rack. “Red or white?” His bright puppy eyes peered up at you, and it was a sight you never wanted to forget.

“Whatever you’re having.”

Steve’s eyes diverted for only a moment, reaching in and pulling out an expensive looking bottle of chardonnay. He stood, opening a top cabinet and grabbing two glasses before he placed them on the granite island and poured lightly into each. His heart was doing somersaults against his rib cage as he carefully slid the glass across the island to you, watching you as you took a sip. The pucker of your lips against the glass made his mind wander, his heartbeat traveling further south than he anticipated. He cleared his throat before taking a sip from his own glass.

Small talk ensued between the two of you as Steve finished up the last dinner preparations. The homemade pasta was ready in only a few minutes, served alongside some salad and the ciabatta he had made.

Dinner went off without a hitch.

The two of you shared sly grins and laughter over the food, a few questions from either one of you slipping its way in between the chatting. As the night progressed, you found yourself inching closer and closer to Steve. It’s how you ended up nestled into his lap after the sun had disappeared from the sky, leaving nothing but silver streams of moonlight flickering through the windows, illuminating your heated skin against his. A movie had been playing, but it soon was turned off when Steve lowered his face to yours, his stubble scratching across your cheek as he kissed at your temple.

Steve had maneuvered the two of you onto his couch, him with his back against the cushions and his feet planted firmly to the rug covering the hardwood floors. You were straddling his lap, your knees digging into the plush couch on either side of his black denim covered thighs. His hands were roaming gently up your legs, dancing across your goose-bumped flesh until they snuck up your dress, palming at your ass. His lips were slow and careful against yours, savoring the time he had and not wanting to rush. Steve wanted to feel you. He wanted to take his time unraveling you bit by bit until you were aching for more.

His tongue was heavy as it moved past your lips, tracing against the inside of your mouth and exploring every inch possible. Breathy groans floated from him when your fingers twisted too tight in his hair, his eyes squeezing shut at the sensation. The tips of his fingers pushed into your skin, deeper and deeper, tethering you to him as if you’d somehow slip from his grasp. With the newfound leverage he pulled your hips toward his, an embarrassingly loud moan coming from you as your panty clad clit rubbed against his thigh. With a widened gaze and blown pupils, he disconnected his lips from yours, a hand slipping up your back to lay you flat against the couch.

Steve was hovering over you in an instant, veins bulging along his forearms and biceps as he planted a hand next to your head, his eyes searching yours frantically. “Can I taste you? Please, baby?” He begged, his chest heaving with anticipation.

With an open, silent mouth, you stayed panting under him, every unsure thought crossing your mind for the umpteenth time that day. What if it’s not what you expected? What if he doesn’t like your body? What if having sex with him right now ruins everything? What if you’re not what he wants? What if-

“Hey…” Steve suddenly whispered as if he was reading your mind, pushing back to sit on his haunches. “We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready. We don’t have to do anything. You don’t have to do anything.” His words were slow and calm, a gentle hand soothing the burning skin along your cheek. His complete understanding slightly shocked you. “You’re under no obligation to do anything with me right now. Do you understand?”

God- what do you even say to that?

“Steve… I’m sorry, I just-” You stumbled over the words, moving to sit up on your elbows.

I just want to be enough.

I just want this to be what you want.

I just don’t want to screw things up.

I just don’t want to lose you.

Your brain was scrambled from his touch. You wanted more, no- you needed more. Would it be so bad to just be honest?

“I’m a virgin, Steve. I’ve never slept with anyone before and I… I’m just nervous, that’s all.” The confession was somewhat mortifying to say aloud, but it released a mass amount of pressure that had festered and culminated in your chest.

Or maybe the bile was just traveling north.

Steve’s eyes softened, the faintest smile curling at his pink and swollen lips. “That’s okay… it’s nothing you need to apologize for, sweetheart.” His words were reassuring, somehow less disappointing than you expected.

And he was being honest- truly. Everyone had to start somewhere, and you not being sexually experienced was something he expected, really. I mean- he’s never seen you so much as breathe toward another guy in your class- let alone show any interest in the plentiful options. Plus, with women like you, always putting your academics first, it was obvious you had never made romantic relationships a priority before.

Would he be ashamed to admit that the confession made his dick throb a bit harder behind the confines of his jeans? Perhaps. But now having that information out in the open, Steve’s mind buzzed with the thought of making you his in every way possible. He would be the first one to make you fall apart on his dick. He would be the first one to taste you, staying between your legs until the ungodly hours of the morning and until you screamed and begged for him to stop. Time wasn’t an issue for Steve. No, he’d wait until the stars came crashing down onto Earth if it meant he could get you exactly how he wanted you. He would be the first to fuck you, to make love to you, to turn you into a blabbering, drooling mess beneath him over and over and over and over and-

“I know- it’s just… kind of embarrassing- I guess.” Your sweet voice pulled him from his fantasies.

Steve was quick to put your worries to rest. “Not in the slightest, angel.” His hand rubbed soothingly across your forearm. “Do you want this? And don’t just say yes because of me, I need you to be sure.”

The contemplation didn’t take long. You did want this. You wanted him, in every way possible.

“I want this, Steve. I do. I just don’t want to disappoint you.” You whispered, a slight waver in your soft words.

A confused scoff left his mouth. “Disappoint me? Honey, I think you severely underestimate my feelings for you. You could never disappoint me.” Again, it was nothing but the truth. Steve’s reverence for you conveyed through his dark eyes, his gaze worshiping every inch of you. He lowered his face to yours, his breath fanning dancing across your skin. “But I won’t allow your first time to happen on my damn couch. C’mere.” He spoke, his large hands finding purchase on your waist, pulling you towards him as your legs wrapped around and connected at his lower back. Your arms fell over his shoulders as he balanced himself upright, wasting no time as he made for the staircase. With large strides he carried you up to his bedroom, crossing the threshold with excitement bursting in his veins.

As soon as your back hit the plushy mattress of his king sized bed his lips were back on yours in a messy embrace. Teeth knocking together, tongues fighting for dominance, warm spit connecting the two of you. Your hands traversed the sides of his broad torso, raking against his shirt and wishing it was his bare chest instead. Steve’s mouth slowed its attack on you, pulling back a few inches for a deep breath. “Will you let me take care of you? Huh? Let me make you feel good, pretty girl.”

You nodded, breathless and practically suffocating from the subtle rocking of his hips. “Yes, fuck- please Steve. I want you to make me feel good.” Those few words were so simple to get out, yet you never thought you’d be saying them to one of your college professors.

But screw it- you couldn’t resist the way he felt. The way he made your insides feel all tingly when he got close. The way he made your head spin. You couldn’t take it any longer. You had to have him.

Right. Now.

Steve backed up from between your thighs, his fingers slipping around the buttons of his shirt in their haste, shaking as they traveled to the buckle of his belt to undo the metal clasp that held it together. Soon he was left in nothing but his boxers, the shadowed outline of his erect cock drooling inside the fabric making a whine pour from your kiss-ridden lips. He was huge. Your mind convulsed alongside your pussy, wondering how the fuck he was going to even attempt to fit inside you. The arousal pooling inside you made your knees wobble, your heart seizing behind your rib cage. Steve was going to completely wreck you…

And you were going to let him.

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redhead-batgal · 2 years

Text

Type: Fic (Think of Me) Part One!

Pairing: Vigilante! Reader and Red Hood/Jason Todd

Prompts: ⚔10: “I’ve got nothing left, it’s clear I’m not wanted nor needed here.”

Content: Character death, angst, tensions, cursing, reader is a book-nerd sorry not sorry, kinda sorta enemies to lovers, they irritate each other a lot, fighting, reader kind of has self-esteem issues, more like concerns about their place in the batfam and whether they matter or not, maybe just a tiny bit of fluff, implied powers.... technically

Word Count: 2,786

P.S: Okay so a while back I got a fic request for Jason, I don’t remember really much just that it was with Jason and a fic request. I think my ask box ate it, but yeah. So the full fic is going to called Think of me, but this Part is called Achilles Heel

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There are weaknesses in this world, things that every single person has. Whether they acknowledge it or not. The weakness exists and is prominent. Some people put their weaknesses on display, either to earn sympathy or to make the weakness disappear, but in the end another weakness will pop up.

Other people will hide away their weakness, to make sure no one find it and they never are vulnerable, that people will never see them vulnerable or get them to that point. They hide their weakness allowing it to grow stronger and stronger. Some even hide the weakness from themselves, hiding it so well not even they know it exists consciously.

However, it does exist and the more they hide it and fight it the more deadly it becomes. The more of a danger it is to the people who hide the weakness so well, so much so that it could be a fatal blow if hit even once.

An Achilles heel, even. Something so vulnerable that once it’s found, one strike and you’re dead. One strike and everything you’ve tried to deny or push away comes to light and everything comes crumbling down.

You didn’t exactly know what to think. Well... maybe you did.

Jason Peter Todd was a major dick, annoying as hell and arrogant as an ass; he was more than a thorn in your side, he was a dagger.

Whether it be in his dumb mask or out of it, he annoyed and irritated you. With his stupid comments, with his ridiculous attitude and his- his infuriatingly attractive face.

At the moment, he was sitting across from you, in the library at Wayne manor, teasing you about your reading choices. You had begun to regret your decision to leave your home, however looking around at the massive library you realized maybe Jason was just something you had to deal with to get this.

“Reading a romance? Are you looking for love Y/N? Or are you making up for something?”

Looking up from your book you smiled at him, noting a similar book in his hand you rolled your eyes. Irritation dance across your skin and you felt the air around you going stiff with tension.

“I mean if you look around there isn’t a lot to hope for in the romance department. So why shouldn’t I read romance novels. Besides boys and men in books are far better than the ones in reality.”

Jason nodded and you scowled, you never seemed to be able to catch him off guard or upset him the way he upset you... that is unless you decided to be particularly cruel. Which you hated doing.

Turning the page in your book hoping that the conversation was over so you could continue reading in peace. However, it hardly seemed that Jason was done.

“I wholeheartedly agree.”

Rolling your eyes, you decided not to take the bait and continued to look at your book. You however could feel Jason’s eyes on you and sighed. Looking up you found him trying to read the cover of your book and you found yourself scowling. Closing the book and tossing it towards him you stood up.

Moving towards the bookshelves you stared up at the full length of them. Pushing up your sleeves slightly you grabbed onto one of the shelves and began pulling yourself up. Placing your foot on one of the shelves you began to climb it.

The farther up you went the better you felt, not only because you’d be out of the way and wouldn’t be bothered on top of the shelf but because there were some really good books up there.

“What are you doing?”

Not even bothering to look down you replied, “Climbing clearly.”

Jason laughed slightly before you heard a book close and footsteps walking closer towards you.

Making it to the top of the shelf you sat yourself down with a sigh. Grabbing the nearest book, you opened it and began to read.

“Why are you on the top of the bookshelf?”

Ignoring him you flipped the page in the book, regretting choosing this particular one since you didn’t really like it the first time you read it.

“Y/N, sweetheart, please tell me you aren’t thinking of jumping.”

You could hear the sarcasm in his voice and rolled your eyes. Peeking out from the top of your book you peered down at him, noticing his staring up at you. He caught your gaze and smiled. Heat hit your cheeks and you hid behind your book.

“I’m up here so you won’t annoy me. You can’t bother me up here.”

“Are you sure about that?”

You froze before lowering your book and glaring at him for a moment. He smiled wider before hoping over the couch and walking towards the bookshelf you were perched upon.

Closing your book, you watched him run a hand along the spines before pausing.

“I’m assuming you’re going to say there’s nothing I can say to get you to come down.”

“Yup,” You replied with narrowed eyes as you replaced the book and grabbed a new one.

Jason nodded before pulling a seemingly random book off of the shelf, he hummed while stepping out of your sight. Something buzzed in your chest, and it was hard not to smile...

No, no Jason didn’t make you smile, he didn’t make you laugh. He was annoying and rude and brash and kind and sweet and and and.... you really didn’t want to get hurt again

“Hey, this is my signed copy.” Jason remarked and you suddenly found yourself leaning forwards hoping to catch a peek of the cover.

You thought some signed copies of books were dumb... others however, other by your favorite authors were pieces of gold.

Leaning forward some more you caught Jason smiling as he hid the cover from your view. You scowled slightly glaring at him and he smirked broadly.

“If you want to see it you have to come down.”

Sighing you felt something race across your skin before you tried leaning forwards again. He tucked the book under his arm, and you huffed, the thing racing across your skin enhancing before a rumbling below you began.

You leaned farther forwards then suddenly the books below you exploded from the shelf causing you to go flying off of the top of the shelf. Your heart was in your throat, and you watched for a second as shock raced across Jason’s face and he bolted towards you.

Hands suddenly were on your waist and the ground bumped into you and something grunted beneath you as books flurried around. You blinked a few times to see Jason below you a slightly pained expression on his face.

“Holy shit!” You exclaimed your face flushing red.

You tried to scramble off of him, but his hands held you in place. He winced slightly before letting out a grunt.

“Nuh, uh. You’re so not running away before you say thanks doll.”

Scowling you looked around at the books and sighed. It wouldn’t hurt to say thanks and he saved you... but your pride, the part of you that still remembered the sting prodded you to not. However, he was hurt so you twitched and wiggled your nose.

“Thank you,” You whispered, your hands almost moving on their own as you moved a strand of hair from his face.

He blinked a few times almost in surprise and his hands moved from your waist to the hand loitering above his face. Moving your hand towards his lips he seemed he was about to kiss your hand when the door to the library swung open.

You looked up, finding Alfred standing in the doorway scrambling off of Jason you fell onto your butt right next to him. Looking around at the books scattered around the two of you, you raised your hands to explain.

“I swear we’ll clean it up.”

Alfred sighed before shaking his head, “I’m afraid you can’t promise that. Both you and Master Jason have been asked by Master Bruce to accompany Master Damian on patrol tonight.”

You blinked a few times and Jason sat up next to you in surprise.

“Patrol? Oh okay.”

Alfred turned to leave and paused for a moment.

“Are you alright Miss Y/N?”

You nodded slowly your face flushing a brighter red. Looking around as Alfred nodded and promptly left the room, you noticed the books lying scattered all around.

A breath of relief escaped you as you noticed not a single book had ripped or fallen apart. Every single one remained intact. Relaxing slightly, you pushed yourself to your feet and hurried out the door.

Moving down the hall you hurried towards the door to your guest room at the manor. Pushing it open you quickly spun around to close it and noticed strangely a chair against the railing across from your door. Thinking nothing of it you shrugged and closed the door. Scrambling to pull out your suit you kept flashing back to Jason. The way he teased you and smiled, the way he kept talking to you and- and and- And the way he made you smile.

Leaning against your door with the suit clutched tight in your hands you sighed. Sinking onto the ground. It was getting harder, harder to lie to yourself, harder to hide your true feelings and keep pretending. Shaking your head, you rose to your feet and quickly change.

By the time you had your suit on and were all geared up, you opened your door to find Damian scowling in the chair just outside of your room. Blinking a few times you met his gaze and had a staring match.

“Demon spawn?”

“L/N, Father insisted Todd, you and I go out on patrol. Todd has been more then irksome so I will be accompanying you until my rage passes. That or until Father comes to terms with me killing him.”

You couldn’t help but snort out a laugh and nod. With a shrug you walked out of your room and towards the stairs. For a moment Damian didn’t move confusion written across his face. You paused and turned back.

“You comin’ boy wonder?”

Nodding Damian rolled his eyes and scoffed but rose from the chair and followed you down the stairs.

______________________________________________________________

The smell of rain was thick in the air and it felt as though there was something lurking around every and any corner. You paused for a moment to look around a crackle of thunder roared on the horizon and you held your breath hoping to hear any attackers coming your way.

You had been chasing a thug of sorts, but the flashing of lightning and crackling of thunder got faster causing your vision and hearing to be less astute then usual.

Something seemed off about this thug, the way you were able to keep such good pace despite it being so dark out, despite the flashes of light and despite you slipping earlier. Something was very off. Could this be a trap? Could the thug be leading you somewhere, where you’ll get kidnapped or killed?

For a split second your mind thought would it be better if you were kidnapped or killed? You knew it wouldn’t but still sometimes you thought- sometimes your wondered if you were doing good at all. If you were actually apart of the bats’ family or just a parasite clinging to the only available life.

Of course, your brain would remind you that you could be on the streets, a pickpocket or underling of gang members. A thug for a rogue, but you weren’t. You were a vigilante, and you were doing good, you chose to do that so you couldn’t be a parasite right? Parasites clung and drained life from people and you weren’t doing that... you weren’t doing that.

A crackle of thunder made you flinch and the sound of heavy boots hitting stone caused you to stiffen. Hands darting towards the utility belt blended into your suit

“Everything going alright over here pretty bird?”

You blinked turning to see Red Hood looking around the area and you let out a sigh of relief. Your hands swinging away from the belt and towards your face.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m just on edge. Storms usually tend to freak me out.”

Red Hood nodded and you noticed how it seemed his gaze stayed on you just for a moment. Almost as if he was debating something.

“You think,” He began pausing for just a moment, “you think you want to turn in? Night’s almost over and everything’s quiet. It wouldn’t hurt to head back to the cave.”

You froze and your heart roared in your chest, beating faster and faster. Did he think you were useless too? That you were just a parasite using the good will of the bats to keep a livelihood. Were you not alone in this thinking?

“I’m fine,” You snapped suddenly, “there was a thug that disappeared around this area. I’m waiting for him to show up again.”

Red Hood took a step forward and you sighed, he did think this. Why wouldn’t he? You were useless and they didn’t need you, this was probably how they were going to get rid of you. Slowly and carefully stopping you from patrolling before they would kick you out.

Part of you hurt, deep in your chest-in your soul, that it had to be him you suggested you leave. That it was Jason, of all people who was the start of you being thrown out. Wasn’t he your friend? Did he- no no. That was all in your stupid head. He never liked you, you only liked him and and- why did it have to be now of all times your realized it?

“Where are you going?” He asked as you turned to leave.

“I’ve got nothing left, it’s clear I’m not wanted nor needed here.” You muttered under your breath

Red Hood took a step forwards, “What?”

Shaking your head, you turned and went to walk away from him, only to see something below. The thug from earlier, moving out of a door down an alleyway. He was here... maybe just maybe you could prove yourself.

Dashing after him you ignored Red Hood’s calls after you. The thug turned a corner into a passage that had no visible roof view. Bounding towards the ground you look around trying to figure out where he went but... he was nowhere to be seen. Where did he go?

There was another crack of thunder and a shout. Your head snapped in the direction of the voice, and something slammed right into you. Suddenly you found yourself on your back with Red Hood above you. His chest rising and falling rapidly with his helmet still on he looked around.

Your body shuttered and shook as though electricity was coursing through it. Air begged to be released from your lungs and taken in all at the same time. Your heart was in overdrive as your vision went blurry from the rain and from fear.

“It’s alright, you’re okay,” Red Hood- no Jason muttered as he looked around, “I’m right here.”

Forcing yourself to breathe slower you nodded. A shot echoed out and you blinked as Jason pushed more into the ground.

“Don’t move” You heard him yell.

A tingling on your skin, something strong and fierce.

Don’t move

Jason stood up and reached for his guns when more shots echoed out. You watched in horror as something his him and he began staggering.

Don’t move

Another shot and another and another.

Bang, bang, bang, tick, bang

What was that?

As more shots rang out Jason went down, and your heat leapt to your throat.

Don’t move

Bangbangbangtickticktickbang

What was that? What was- Jason lay on the ground and your body began buzzing and humming. The tingling grew into something more and began etching itself into you.

Jasonjasonjason

Your mouth opened to scream his name as he lay motionless and your heart skidded to a stop. He... he had saved you and now wasn’t moving. Was he dead? Was he alright? What was going on???

tickticktickticktick

A crackle of thunder echoed overhead as a slash of lightning struck the air. Your body shook as the tingling became a burning. On your arms and chest, in your thungs burning hotter and faster and faster till...

“JASON!”

With that the burning scorched into flames and

Ticktick...boom

Everything went white hot as the world around exploded into flames and screams.

Tag list:

@andromedaj2003 @daemonnix96 @zvtanna @masset-fotia @thomasbeloved @thefallingstarlight @Krswrites

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stllite · 2 years

Text

i’ll love you forever ˎˊ˗

nwh spoilers !

peter parker x stark!reader

word count 2k

summary after all the loss you had been through, all you had was peter. what happens when you lose him too?

warnings a lot of angst, sorta making out ?

authors note hi so this is the first thing i’ve written that i’m posting so kinda scary lol. i’m really broken after nwh so here’s my way of coping. i really hope you enjoy!

you had thought you had finally won.

or at least were about to.

you knew that even when things seemed like it was going to shit, you’d figure it out.

you and peter.

he’d told you this one night when he had snuck into your room after patrol with cuts and bruises all over his face.

peter stared at you while you were cleaning up his wounds.

you seemed on edge.

“hey,” he started. “what’s wrong?”

you stopped your movement and looked down at him.

he knew that look. you were worried.

“nothing,” you forced. “i’m not the one you should be worried about pete.”

you finished up cleaning his wound and patched it up with a bandaid. you walked away from him to put the first aid kit back in your drawer.

he sighed. “i’m okay, y/n. i told you this many times since i got here-“

“how do i know that?” you interrupted, turning around to face him. he saw tears in your eyes and his heart shattered. “i just- i don’t want anything bad to happen to you. i can’t- i can’t lose you peter.” you struggled to say.

he rushed up to you and pulled you into his arms. you sobbed into his chest.

his heart ached. he wanted to take all your pain away. you didn’t deserve it at all.

“i’m sorry.” you sniffled.

“hey, hey. it’s okay don’t be sorry.” he said hushing you.

he rubbed your back and combed your hair with his other hand in attempt to calm you down.

once your cries softened, you pulled back to look at him.

he was so beautiful, you thought. even with cuts and bruises all over his face, he was still so beautiful to you.

he looked at you with a soft smile. you can tell he was tearing up a bit.

he hates seeing you sad.

“peter,” you started, looking into his eyes. “please. just please promise me you’ll be careful. i can’t lose you too. you mean everything to me.” you whispered as you reached a hand up to caress his face.

he leaned into your touch. “i promise.” he stated as he kissed your hand.

“sometimes, i just wished all of this will stop. and we can live normal lives. its just too much sometimes and i can’t handle it, i mean with everything that’s already happened-“

“baby,” peter interrupted. “i feel the same way sometimes. but remember, even when things feel like they’re going to shit or are going to shit, we always figure it out. together. it may not always end in a happy ending but, we always have each other. and i’m not leaving you anytime soon i can promise you that. you’ll always have me.”

you started to tear up. he knew things weren’t easy for you and you knew the same for him.

but he was right. you guys always stuck together and figured it out.

you guys had each other.

you nodded and smiled at him. he wiped a tear that was falling down your face.

you looked down at his lips and he got the hint and pulled you closer until there was no space left between you two.

“i love you,” you stated breathlessly while pulling back from him only to go back in for more.

“i love you so much more,” he said trailing kisses down your neck.

“not possible.”

“what’s taking them so long?” you sighed, rubbing your head in frustration.

you tried to think back on what peter said but hell, you were worried.

you never really trusted strange after everything that had happened. especially with your dad.

you never really talked about it with anyone expect for peter of course and your best friends mj and ned.

but you hardly brought it up.

though, you felt in your heart something was wrong.

“do you think i should go up there?” you asked while turning your head to ned.

“trust peter, y/n. i bet they’re just trying to figure some things out and then everything will be okay and back to normal.” ned said trying to calm you down. he had hope that what he said was true but a part of him didn’t think so.

he was worried too.

finally, after what felt like an eternity, he turns around and swings over his way to you and ned.

you sigh of relief and smile once he lands and runs to you guys.

you and ned crush him in a hug.

“are you okay?” you asked him pulling away.

“yeah, yeah. i’m okay.” he said smiling at you and ned.

“are you guys okay?” peter asked back.

you both nodded.

“uh-“ he hesitated as he turned around and looked up at the sky.

“guys,” he started, turning back to you two. ”we don’t have much time.” he warned.

your face dropped.

“what-what do you mean we don’t have much time? peter, you’re scaring me what’s going on?” you blurted worriedly. your heart raced and you felt you couldn’t breathe.

“you guys are gonna forget me.” he confessed.

“what? i don’t want to forget you.” ned puled.

“what do you mean peter?” you questioned, face dropping.

“this is the only way. they’re coming after me.” peter explained.

“no, no.” you whispered to yourself looking down at the floor.

“i can fix it. we- we can fix it!” you blurted out, trying to hold back your tears. peter shook his head in disagreement.

“there has to be another way. i’ll figure it out!” you continued, grabbing peter’s hand.

“y/n,” peter stated quietly as you kept going. “y/n!” he yelled calmly, causing you to stop.

“there’s no other way. i’m sorry.” he sought, pursing his lips.

he let go of your hand and it felt like your world had shattered.

you cant lose him too.

ned looked down at his feet in disapointment while you shook your head in disagreement.

“its okay though! i’ll figure it out. i’ll find you guys and everything will be normal again.” he pondered, trying to be hopeful.

“no peter. nothing will ever be normal again.” you practically whispered.

tears started to fall down your face.

“you’re right. but i can try and make it better. i’m sorry for this but i swear i will try and make it better. i’ll tell you guys everything- i’ll find you guys. okay?” he smiled, tears rolling down his face.

you looked at him, frowning.

this was exactly what you were scared for. losing him. losing your everything.

ned let out a quiet sob.

“hey, it’ll be okay.” he said reaching over to ned pulling him into a hug.

“i love you, man.” ned says well into the hug. “i love you too.” peter smiles.

they do their handshake for possibly the last time and smile at each other. ned backs away, leaving just you and peter. peter then makes his way over to you.

“hey,” he reaches for your hands and pulls you closer to him. “ill make everything better, alright?”

you sighed. “you promised.” you look up at him making eye contact.

he saw what he saw that night he came back from patrolling. worry and fear.

but he saw something else…

sadness and loss.

his heart felt like it was broken into pieces.

“you promised we’ll be together and that you wouldn’t leave me. peter you promised! i can’t lose you please i can’t-“ you trembled.

he pulled you into his chest just like that night.

“y/n, i’m so sorry. we don’t have much time, my love.” he began.

you pulled back from him and looked at your feet, sniffling.

“y/n, can you look at me?” he said lifting your chin up. you looked up at him.

he held your face. “i know things didn’t turn out the way we wanted them to but hey! it’ll all be okay.“

“no peter-“ you started.

“it will,” he interrupted, looking directly in your eyes. “be all okay. i promise.”

as much as you didn’t want to believe him, as much as you didn’t want to believe all of this was happening and that you could fix it and things would be normal, you knew deep down that this was the only way.

and you trusted him.

if he says everything is going to be okay, then it will.

you nodded slowly. a weak smile forming on your face.

you wrapped your arms around him and pulled him closer to you, making sure you felt all of him.

for possibly the last time.

“i’ll find you, i’ll tell you everything that has happened, and prove it before you think i’m a weirdo,” he laughed causing you to chuckle. “hey, there’s the beautiful smile i love.” he said, lifting your chin up with his finger.

you blushed and smiled up at him more. though, you felt so much pain in your heart.

he sighed and smiled back. “i’ll find you, y/n/n. okay?” he said.

you nodded. “okay.”

he pulled you into a hug, savoring every moment he had with you.

you wanted this moment to last forever. you never wanted to let go.

“i love you. god, i love you so fucking much.” you said while you pulled back, still holding tight to him.

he smiled. admiring every single inch of you. you were an angel in his eyes.

absolutely beautiful.

“i love you more than you’ll ever know. i’ll love you forever.” he said softly.

you reached behind his neck and pulled him close so his lips were on yours, savoring the taste of him.

you kissed him trying to express all of your love to him, things that words couldn’t do justice for.

he kissed back with just as much passion, pulling you closer if possible.

“is this goodbye?” you asked, pulling away from the kiss.

he put his head on yours, noses touching. “for now. but not forever.”

you both closed your eyes, trying to cherish every last second with each other.

but it was soon over once he kissed your lips one last time.

“i have to go. i love-“

“no. say it to me when you see me again. okay?”

he nodded.

you smiled at him as he walked away from you, both your hands slowly peeling apart.

he then stood on the edge of the concrete, sighing to himself as he looked at the view beyond him.

you walked next to ned and held his hand, letting him know you were there for him.

you gave him a soft smile which he returned.

peter turned around and looked at you guys one last time.

‘i love you’ you mouthed to peter.

he smiled at you and then turned around.

you watched him swing away and thought back to all the memories you had shared with him.

because you were never going to get those back.

peter was nervous.

were you going to reject him? look at him weird?

well you probably were considering all of this did sound crazy but it was going to be okay! right?

he walked through the streets of new york, rehearsing what he was going to say by reading what he had wrote on his paper.

he finally got to his destination and opened the doors.

it was a coffee shop that you were always at since your best friend mj had worked there.

he walked in, hands in his pockets and that’s when he saw you.

you were currently sitting at the bar, looking through your phone.

it took everything in him to not run up to you and tell you everything.

to have you back.

“can i help you?” someone said, interrupting his thought.

he turned and looked and it was mj behind the counter.

“uh-no i’m okay for now. just uh-“ he stated, turning his attention back on you. “just looking for someone.” he went on.

“okay. just let me know if you need anything.” mj stated while walking away towards your direction.

he watched as mj spoke to you. the way you were smiling, laughing, talking.

you were glowing.

and he missed you so much.

when mj walked away from you, he took up the courage and walked over to you and sat down next to you.

“um hi. i’m peter parker.” he stated nervously, fumbling with the piece of paper in his pocket.

you turned your attention away from your phone and smiled sweetly at him.

“oh, hi. i’m y/n. i don’t believe we’ve met.”

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker angst #peter parker fluff #peter parker smut #peter parker x you #peter parker x y/n #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland angst #tom holland fluff #marvel #spider man: no way home #spider man #marvel mcu

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ameliora-j · 3 years

Text

twin flame iii // gw x reader

words: 2.2k

warnings: angst, breakup, mention of bruising, crying, angelina slander kinda (it’s just for the story i love her sm!), yn is sorta a pick me if you squint sry, cringey mediocre writing at very best

an: i used song lyrics for some of the argument and the ending :) i hope you like it besties!

part one | part two | part four

you george! i want you!

the words had been running through his mind since the night you left. he had been going over the days leading up to your explosion in his mind for weeks. your words were in his mind day and night. your pained expression, your anger, your hurt. you consumed him. more than you usually did.

george weasley knew he fucked up. he knew without anyone telling him. but they did anyway. every waking second they did. first it was fred, calling him a jerk. then ron, who called him a “bloody idiot.” then ginny, who told him it was his own fault. and then his mum. of course his mum, who said in exact words: “george fabian weasley, this is nobody’s fault but your own. quit moping around and do something to fix it! i didn’t raise you to treat women this way!”

his last straw, however, was his older brother percy. percy of all people. who looked at him with a disappointed shake of his head. receiving a disappointed head shake from percy was nothing out of the ordinary, especially for george. it was his words that stung. percy spoke ten simple words to him that truly set george off. percy spoke “you lost the best thing that’s ever happened to you.” at his sentence, george lost it.

“i know that percy! you don’t think i fucking know that i lost the best thing that ever happened to me! and fred i know i’m a jerk and ron i know i’m an idiot and ginny i know it’s my fault and mum i’m sorry okay! i know you didn’t raise me like this i don’t know what’s wrong with me but i don’t think she’s coming back!” he fell back onto the couch as he tugged frustratedly at his roots.

“george… do you love her?” molly asked him.

“yes mum,” a whimper escaped the fiery-haired boy’s throat. “i love her more than i’ve ever loved anyone before. she’s my world,” he revealed.

“then go, george. go get her,” his dad said. “for your sake and her’s,” he told him.

“and our’s!” fred called distantly from the kitchen.

“shove off fred!” george called back before apparating to your front door. he knocked three times and waited for someone to answer it. when you opened the door, he was shocked at your state.

makeup streaked down your cheeks with your shoulder bruised and your arm in a splint. your eyes were red and puffy, but they were furthermore accompanied by dark bags as if you hadn’t slept in weeks. the truth is; you hadn’t. “hi george,” you mumbled half heartedly.

“hi butterfl-“ you cut him off.

“yn. my name is yn,” you spoke sternly.

“i’ve called you butterfly since you were three…” he murmured.

“not anymore. hurts too bad to hear it. did you need something?” you quickly changed the subject.

“i want to talk to you,” he said. you nodded and walked in, telling him to follow you. george said hello to your brother and then followed you into the lounge where you two sat on the loveseat and you turned to face him.

you sat in a long silence as your eyes traced each other’s features. you memorized him. every line, every freckle, every bump, bruise, and blemish. the silence was deafening. untill he finally broke it. “what happened to your arm?” he murmured softly.

“it splinched when i apparated home. then i apparated again and made it worse,” you bit your lip softly.

“always so reckless,” he tutted softly, causing you to shrug.

“what’d you wanna talk about? know you didn’t come to talk about my arm…” you attempted to get to the point of his visit.

“right,” he murmured softly. “yn i…” he took a deep breath. “the day that i let you walk out of my life is the day that i made the worst mistake in the history of mistakes. i’ve done some stupid things in my life, but letting you walk away has by far been the stupidest. i’m so so sorry that i hurt you the way i did, i cannot express to you how sorry i am, i truly cannot. i love you, yn. with all of me i do, you have to believe me when i say that.”

“i do believe you george. i just don’t believe that you love me the way that i love you. and carrying around that pain is killing me. i mean absolutely destroying me. you live in my mind rent free. you’ve infested it,” you told him. “you with your stupid pretty smile and your god awful jokes and your ridiculous pranks that you somehow always rope me into and your perfect hair and your pretty eyes and just. you. george. stupid you. oblivious you. godric george,” you roughly shoved his chest. “i’ve loved you for years and you’ve always looked past me!” tears rimmed your bottom lash line and your voice cracked as you lashed out on him.

“for years george, i mean years! i’ve watched you fall in love with countless girls just to have your heart broken by them. i stuck by you through everything. even when you stopped being being my friend because it made angelina uncomfortable i waited for you george! and you just pushed me to the side. i did everything for you. i executed pranks for you. i planned pranks for you. i took the fall for you. i got detention for you! i did it all for you. i mean the countless amount of things i did just to be able to call you mine and i just… you didn’t care! you’ve never cared! you’ll never love me the way that i love you and that hurts. so. fucking. bad.” you wiped your eyes.

“it kills me george. it eats at me, every single day it does. i stood by your side and i took the blame with you even when i had nothing to do with the stupid shit you pulled at hogwarts because yeah i was going down, but hey, at least i was doing it with you, right? we made so much trouble and-and we used to laugh. and be happy. we were genuinely happy and i don’t know where we went wrong but we did, but i still say that i hate you with a smile on my face! i don’t get it george why don’t you love me!” a whimper tore itself from the depths of your chest as you let out a silent sob.

“now look what we’ve became…” he murmured, tears falling from your eyes.

“all the things i did just to call you mine… and… and all the things you said but… somehow, i still hope i was your favorite crime. cause merlin knows you were mine.” you sniffled as you wiped your eyes.

“you were mine. you’ll always be my favorite crime.” he leaned over and kissed your head as another silent sob racked your body. “now it’s bittersweet to think about the damage that we did,” he smiled over at you sadly. “i love you butterfly. just as much as you love me, if not more,” he whispered as he stood from his place.

you rolled your eyes water-logged eyes, but still managed to smile. “i wish you thought about that before,” you whispered.

“i do too… i guess i’ll have to just call you the one that got away then?” he asked.

“in another life georgie… i’d be your girl. and we’d keep every promise that we made,” you told him.

“and i wouldn’t have to say you were the one that got away,” you nodded as he kissed your head again. “i love you, butterfly. i always have.”

“i love you too, georgie. i always will,” you sniffled as you watched him walk out the door. you didn’t want this. you wanted to stop him. everything in your body screamed at you to stop him. but your brain wouldn’t work. your heart said no. you were scared of being hurt again.

you wanted to do something. yell at him. tell him to come back. to hug you. to never leave you. to never let you go. but your heart wouldn’t let you. you were frozen in time.

it’ll all get better in time.

you’d heard the saying time and time again. especially after your parents passed away. it was people’s favorite line to use when they saw you. the truth is… you didn’t stop hurting. the pain didn’t go away. you just got used to it. but the pain you were feeling now… you didn’t know if it would ever go away. at least it didn’t feel like it.

two months. it had been two months since george walked out of your house that night. it was nobody’s fault but your own, and somehow you couldn’t help wishing he would’ve stayed.

you saw him everywhere. in the stars in the night sky. in the sunrise and the sunset. in coffee shops and store windows. even in your dreams when you slept. so logically, you decided to stop. if you didn’t sleep you couldn’t dream. and if you didn’t dream, you couldn’t see him.

you dutifully ignored the pain in your chest like an annoying bug on a picnic. you pretended that you were fine, but the reality was; you weren’t. but you played it off. and you were able to keep up your facade. untill one day… that one fateful day tucked in the corner at ninety three diagon alley. your brother asked you to pick up ten second pimple vanisher because he had a date tonight and just received a pimple the size of jupiter on his nose, causing him to look like “the muggle myth rudolph the red-nosed reindeer” as he put it.

you walked into the shop and kept your head down as you searched the aisles. it wasn’t where it usually was. you knew this shop like the back of your hand, of course you had… you’d worked there for nearly three years. you furrowed your brows as you looked around. the shop had completely transformed. nothing was in the place it usually was. that’s when your eyes landed there. on her. right at the front, behind the till at the register you worked, in the uniform you wore was angelina johnson.

you sighed deeply as you extended your neck around the corner to where the office was. you smiled triumphantly as you saw fred sitting at his desk and began your trek. you gently knocked twice on the opened door and fred called, “come in,” distractedly.

you walked in and sat on the desk, right in front of him, forcing him to look up at you. “yn!” fred exclaimed.

“hi freddie!” you smiled as a giggle escaped your lips and you returned the death-grip hug he had enveloped you in.

“what brings you by? not that i don’t love seeing your pretty face, of course,” he shot you a playfully flirtatious wink.

“ybn needs ten second pimple vanisher because he has a date tonight and he woke up with a pimple the size of jupiter on his nose,” fred laughed loudly at your remark. “i tried to look for it, but the stores completely turned around,” you pouted slightly.

“oh yeah, we changed some things up because we needed room for our new products. they’re still in the making, but george disappeared,” he hummed.

“george what?” you asked.

“you didn’t know…?” he asked you.

“no. i… i had no idea,” you stuttered.

“yeah. after the night he went to talk to you, he left a note on our kitchen counter and all his things were packed and he just… left. we haven’t seen or heard from him since. ‘s just been angie and i running the shop now. couldn’t do it alone,” fred explained as he picked up the box. “here you are l-“ before he could finish, you were halfway out the door. “YN WAIT!” he called. “YOU FORGOT YOUR PRODUCT!”

“SORRY FRED! YBN WILL BE OKAY I HAVE TO GO!” you called as you ran out the door as fast as your feet would carry you. if you knew george weasley… and you did… there was only one place he could be. and you prayed to any and every god that would listen that he was there. you prayed like your life depended on it that he was okay. you needed to fix this. to fix him. to make it alright.

in this moment you knew that he needed you. he needed you like peanut butter needs jelly. the way left needs right. like the sun needs the moon. he needed you like you needed him. you ran and ran and ran for miles untill you got to a secluded area. then you took a breath. and you apparated.

it was exactly the way you left it. a dingy old wooden box house sitting at the highest branch of a sycamore tree. you groaned softly as you began to climb the many branches. “george i swear to godric you better be in here,” you grumbled to yourself as you climbed.

it felt like hours—truly it was ten grueling minutes at most—untill you got to the door of the house. you whispered the password and it creaked open. “georgie,” you breathed when you saw him.

there he was. laying on the floor of the treehouse wrapped in blankets and a sleeping bag with a small pillow under his head. the apple to your pie. the straw to your berry. the smoke to your high. the one you knew you’d marry.

the one that got away. your twin flame.

add yourself to the taglist

tags: @ellerosie2332 @i-love-scott-mccall @rmvb24 @astralpcrker @daisybloommm @maybeisthemoon @moonliightbabes @stormi-ames @jochim322 @coninl @melonoptimist @lunajoyce3 @clairdemoony @mangoberry99 @imclueless @enya-2004 @prongsyy @Lol-whoandwhat-is-dis @burnfleur @anything444ourmoony @horrorxweasley @alicecullens-gf @theincredibledeadlyviper @georgeweasleyshoe3697 @narwhalebaby @cloudyskylines @ezmayzworld @aesthete-c @lunacurlclaw @snktastarkov @rudypankowisdaddy @ohnoitsmekc @all-hailreyna @sapphirepixiesworld @gloryekaterina @sisi.bby @lisszabini

* crossed out means i couldn’t tag you

#twin flame #george weasley #harry potter #harry potter x reader #charlie weasley x reader #charlie weasley #george weasley x reader #best friends to lovers #harry potter angst #harry potter smut #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fluff #george weasley smut #george weasly angst #george weasley fluff #twin flame series #twin flame part three

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proserpina-magnus · 3 years

Text

Regulus Black dating a muggleborn

word count: 2863

[ warning; gender neutral reader, mention of death, description of crying, angst, no happy fucking ending, swearing, mention of lap sitting (none sexual), kissing, awkward teen love, regulus is kind of edgy and a dick sometimes ]

Fanon Regulus, not Canon. This doesn't line up with anything canon! So please do not take this seriously.

- Did I say dating? I meant secretly dating.

- Regulus spotted you studying alone at a table in The Three Broomsticks, he just couldn't hide the part of him that felt an intriguing feeling towards you.

- He asked a few people around, nudging them and gesturing towards you, asking a small "who are they?"

- It took him a few days to finally get someone to answer him and once he knew your name, he knew he'd fallen into a rabbit hole. he couldn't stop thinking about you, his mind twirling around your name in a constant spiral.

- Luckily, you had been partnered with him for a potions assignment. he couldn't talk to you, he couldn't even mutter a "hi" he was so nervous.

- He had never felt this nervous feeling in his stomach, it was coming to the point it was drowning him.

- Finally, the next day during potions he was able to gain enough courage and actually talk to you about the project, though his voice sounded so mellow and drawn out, like honey.

- He didn't try to engage in conversation other than the assignment, so when you offered that you and him could go to the library and do a bit more research, he said yes almost immediately.

- You both decided to go after dinner since the library wasn't as filled in the evening.

- So when he came back to his dorm after eating, he tried to change into something more casual than his school uniform. it took him a good 15 minutes to pick what he deemed was fit for the occasion.

- He was just about ready to step out the door with his books until his dormmate said something that caught his interest.

- "you're meeting up with your potions partner, arent you?"

- "Yeah, why?'

- "Nothing, it's just their a mudblood, you shouldn't be hanging around those types of people"

- "oh... I didn't know they were a... mudblood"

- 'yeah, nasty they are. you should just ditch 'em"

- So regulus did, he ditched you. he felt guilty, leaving you all alone in the library. you must had thought he was another pureblood prick.

- His conclusion was right, you waited for a good thirty minutes for him. When you realized he wasn't coming, you just decided to do the whole project yourself, it was better if you could just get this stupid assignment done yourself so you'd both could go your separate ways.

- The next day when he got to potions class, he saw you pass in a report to Professor Slughorn. He felt his stomach drop, he knew well enough you had finished the assignment last night without him.

- After class, he caught up with you, pulling you aside as he watched you stare up at him blankly.

- "what?" you had asked him, a hand on your hip as you gave an annoyed sigh.

- "I'm sorry I ditched you, I just didn't know you were a... muggle-born" he admitted, looking anywhere but your eyes as he caught a few of Slytherin boys looking at the two of you.

- "whatever, Black"

- " you didn't have to do the whole assignment, I would have helped you."

- Your eyes met the Slytherin boys who were watching you both, you gave a pitiful frown.

- " don't worry about it, I get it. next time, just tell the professor you don't want to work with me. don't lead me on for a stupid joke"

- He didn't get to explain himself as he watched you walk away, he felt horrible. he had never felt this deep connection to someone before, it made his heart sink when he watched you turn the corner.

- A few months pass, he hadn't gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. he felt like an idiot, he had a chance and he completely blew it,

- Late at night, regulus would stare at his ceiling and dream about what would happen if he had just done what he wanted if he had gone to finish the assignment with you. You both would meet up, exchange dislikes and likes, talk about your dreams for the future.

- He couldn't focus on quidditch, it was coming more frequent of his team captain yelling at him.

- Luckily, he had gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. both of you were selected to be a part of the slug club. Regulus was going to say no, but when he heard your name get mentioned, he joined.

- The first dinner party of slug club, was like a dream. his eyes scanned over your outfit and how it looked absolutely pleasing on your body. his eyes kept siding over to where you sat and when you caught him, he would just look away.

- After a few more meetings, he was done with the 'whole looking away whenever you looked at him' , there were only a few more months of Hogwarts left. his eyes met yours and he didn't look away, he gave a smile.

- When you had smiled back, he couldn't help but smile a bit wider, his cheeks glowing with a red flame.

- The next meeting, you had sat next to him. it didn't take long until you both had been exchanging words and stories, laughing at jokes and giving each other shy looks.

- After a dinner meeting during slug club, Regulus offered to walk you back to your house common room. (if you are in Slytherin, then he would just walk with you till you both had to go separate ways to your dorm).

- Once you arrived at your destination, it was awkward. He looked anywhere but you, his face was hot with red as he began to get flustered.

- You had said a quiet goodbye, turning to head back to your dorm but he grabbed your hand. Holding you back as he stiffened up and asked you out.

- "will you go out with me? This weekend, it's a Hogsmeade trip, I'll pay." His words were hard, but his body language was a complete mess.

- "you're not gonna ditch me again are you?"

- "no, defiantly not ." His words had still been raw and hard, he felt like he was going to throw up butterflies.

- "I'm a muggle-born, I heard you purebloods don't really like us very much. This kind of seems like a set-up"

- God you hoped it wasn't a set-up, ever since you've sat next to regulus at the slug club meetings, he had stolen your heart.

- "It might become an issue for some... people, but it doesn't bother me much"

- Regulus was defiantly not good at phrasing things, especially romantic feelings.

- You didn't take his words too seriously, you debated for a minute. You wanted to go with him, it felt like every nerve was alive.

- "Alright, one date couldn't hurt" with your words, you leaned up to kiss his cheek.

- "goodnight Regulus" ... and then you had disappointed out of his view. Once you reached your dorm, you screamed into your pillow with excitement.

- The date went well, you both had gone to the three broomsticks sticks and sat at a table near the very back.

- You had talked about everything you could, Though he made sure to stay away from the conversation of his family. He didn't want to ruin the date by mentioning his pureblood supremacist family. It's sorta a mood killer.

- You both stayed out of busy spots, even hiding and giggling in a bush as his dorm mates passed.

- That was your first kiss with regulus, tangled in bushes and twigs as you heard footsteps fading. His lips were soft, his hand coming to rest on your cheek.

- When you pulled away, both of you were flushed and looking towards the soil. He walked you back to Hogwarts, separating ways.

- You both couldn't see each other often, only giving each other looks in class or exchanging waves when passing each other in the hallways.

- It was fine for a few months, though the secret meetings were stressful yet fun. You didn't want to hide anymore, which resulted in your first fight.

- "don't you get it? I can't be seen with you! I've told you about my family. They don't like muggle-borns, this Voldemort guy doesn't either and I can't risk exposing our relationship! You'll get hurt!"

- "I don't care if I get hurt Regulus! Our love shouldn't be hidden because your afraid of what people will think! I'm tired of this sneaking around, I'm sick of it!"

- The fighting continued for minutes, both exchanging hateful words. At one point he had said something very vial, saying he couldn't be seen with someone like yourself.

- "What is that suppose to mean?" You sneered at him, eyes tearing up as your arms crossed over your chest.

- "you know damn well what it means," he said back, quick and hard as he just glared down at you.

- You huffed, turning away as you wiped at your cheek. You turned back, shaking your head at him before disappearing out of the room.

- He stayed in the room for a while, thinking about everything. He was so angry, his veins were about to pop from frustration. He hated his family, he couldn't believe that he would lose the one he loved because of his ratchet mother and father.

- He went to Sirius, which was a first in forever. He explained everything to him, he told him how he was sneaking around with a muggle-born and how he didn't want to stop loving you.

- Sirius smirked, thinking he had finally gotten Regulus to betray their spoiled family. Sirius talked his ear off, telling him that he was glad he was gonna change himself and come join the hated family member club.

- Regulus didn't just want to leave the family, he wanted revenge.

- He disregarded Sirius, telling him to piss off and leave him alone for a while.

- The end of 6th year was coming up and Regulus wasn't given any chance to speak to you. He knew damn well you both hadn't separated, just fought. Though he laid in bed at night and worried so hard he thought his brain was gonna rot.

- On the train, he made sure to pull you into a compartment with just you and him. Shutting the blinds so no one will disturb you both.

- "Regulus I don't want to talk to you"

- "I can't meet with you or write to you all summer, I'm not putting up with this break anymore. I only have 2 hours with you and I'm not wasting it."

- "aren't you afraid you're gonna be spotted with me?" ... Regulus wasn't quite good at sarcasm (HA! As if) but he knew well enough from the tone of your voice that you weren't too happy.

- Regulus sighed hard, watching you look out the window as you played with the bottom of your shirt; tucking it in and out of your skirt/trousers (or whatever you're comfortable in).

- "I'm going to do something crazy over the summer break and I don't know if it's going to work but all I know is if I can protect you, I will."

- "regulus what are you talking about?" You asked, you felt worry build up in your stomach. You reached out, grabbing his hand.

- He instantly interlocked your fingers together, he moved to your side as he stared deep into your eyes. His eyes always looked so cold, but right now in this moment, they felt warm.

- "I love you, honestly, if I could marry you right now I would"

- He denied to speak about what he said before, he didn't give you any more information.

- Halfway through the ride, you had been positioned on his lap. His arms looped around your waist as his head rested in the crook of your neck. He let you play with his hands.

- " I love you too" you mumbled in the quiet atmosphere. Regulus held you tighter at the words.

- "hmm?" He hummed, wanting you to say those words again.

- " you told me you loved me, I didn't say it back. But I do love you regulus, I love all of you."

- Regulus felt himself smiling, he couldn't stop the wide grin as he nudged his head into yours lovingly.

- "I can't wait to see you after the summer break" you whispered to him, kissing his forehead as you felt the train start to slow down.

- Dread filled the empty spaces as you hugged each other as tight as possible, not wanting to let go.

- "it's alright, I'll see you after summer. I promise" he whispered into your ear, before bringing your lips to his and kissing one last time.

- The kiss felt like fireworks, there was so much longing and passion mixed into it you didn't want it to end.

- Sadly, the kiss ended and regulus soon disappeared in the crowd of people.

- That summer, regulus had gotten the death mark, he reeked of anger and emptiness. All he wanted was to see you again, to hold you in his arms and kiss you until you both couldn't breathe.

- He had gotten close to Voldemort, he played all the deatheaters with his fake words and praises. He had learned about Voldemort's Horcruxes.

- Regulus had sat at dinner, fork pressed into his hand as he thought hard. His love for you was so strong, he would kill for it.

- He counted down the days until summer break would end.

- 2 more weeks.... 13 days... 11 days... 8 days...

- On the 7th day before September 1st, his plan came to action. He would destroy Voldemort's Horcrux and defeat him and after, he would live 7th year in peace.

- Though his plans didn't come to a win. It stormed and rages of rain came upon him as he made his way to the cave. All he could hear was his heartbeat and the sound of rain outside, along with the padding of Kreacher feet.

- He could hear his breath, his eyes casting over every edge and dark spot. He smiled, he was going to do it, he was going to defeat Voldemort.

- "Whatever I say Kreacher, don't listen. Just keep feeding me the water"

- Kreacher grumbled, "of course, sir"

- "for you love, all for you" regulus whispered before dipping the shell into the crevasse, bringing it to his lips as he took a sip.

- Drinking the liquid felt like poison, regulus had to fight himself to not throw it up.

- The liquid was almost gone, but Kreacher had to take regulus place and force-feed him. Regulus was begging and thrashing, saying whatever came to mind.

- Regulus couldn't finish the drink, weird slimy skeletons climbed from the water surrounding them. Regulus was in a horrid state he couldn't even tell.

- When Kreacher finally force-feed him the last of it, regulus mind came to stillness. His limbs too weak, but he was able to understand that the weird-looking skeletons were not friends.

- "Kreacher, take the Horcrux and go! Hide it! Try anything to destroy it! Go!" He had yelled out, voice dry and strangled.

- Kreacher had to obey by request, he snapped his fingers and disappeared with the Horcrux.

- Regulus tried to fight, his wand shook in his hand as he casts spells after spells. It worked for a few minutes, but there was only one of him and so many of them.

- Regulus was pulled into the water, he kicked and thrashed in spite of trying to get loose. He couldn't swim even if he escaped, his eyes stared through the muddy water as his lungs filled with it.

- Regulus thought of you, your smile, the first time you kissed him, the way your hand fit in his so perfectly, the way you would send him kind eyes whenever he passed you in the halls.

- He sank, and of course his body was dead, but his mind was still there. He was barely conscious enough, but he was there. His body limp and rotten as the years pass.

- His disappearance travelled fast, you had heard first on the train.

- The first years had wondered why a a 7th year was weeping so bad that they couldn't even stand properly.

- You shook hard, gasping and not even trying to grab anything as you sank to the floor of the train. You couldn't care that people were giving you looks, your boyfriend was gone.

- Regulus was gone.

#regulus black #regulus black x you #regulus black x reader #regulus black smut #regulus black headcanon #regulus black imagine #regulus black oneshot #marauder x reader #marauder x you #regulus black x reader smut #marauder era #marauders headcanon #sirius black #regulus black x gender neutral reader #marauders headcanons #regulus black x reader headcanons #marauders angst #marauder angst #marauders era angst

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struggling-with-time · 3 years

Text

How the lack of a nickname can become something more [Corpse x reader]

Paring: Corpse husband x Gender Neutral!reader

Summary: “Hi! Sorry if this is weird, it’s my first time making a request but could you maybe write something for Corpse Husband where the reader is a streamer that’s very friendly and always calls her friends/people she’s playing with these cute nicknames (like babe, sweetie, hun...). But she has a crush on Corpse, so she never uses any of the nicknames on him and everyone thinks it’s because she doesn’t like him, so she has to explain to her stream?” requested by @voidcaine

Warnings: fluff, sorta angst

Words: 1.9k words

A/N: I had a good idea where this was supposed to go, then it went the complete other direction. Also does anyone want to read my original stuff?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Hey guys!” You join the discord call with the group of people to start a game of Raft. Tonight, it’s going to be you, Rae, Sykkuno, Toast and Corpse. You all greet each other and exchange pleasantries.

“Hey Y/N, how was your time off?” Toast is the first to ask about your 2 weeks off from streaming.

“Thank you hun, it was pretty nice. I got a lot of things done, and I can soon tell the date of my next project.” You tease your audience.

The rest have already played the Raft before, leading to them giving you a chaotic introduction to the game. Leaving you more confused about what you are supposed to do than before.

“Rae babe, am I supposed to know what’s going on?” You don’t have to wait long, as Rae immediately responds.

“No. Not at all.” Resulting in a laugh from everyone.

You join into the game, and slowly start figure the controls out. Mostly you are just following Sykkuno around and trying to do the same things as him, yet somehow you do it worse.

Sykkuno ends up falling off the raft and gets killed by a shark before long.

“Sykkuno nooo! Not my sweetheart this world is too cruel!” You act dramatic, before he respawns.

“Does this mean I’m a ghost now? Because I will haunt you for pushing me off.” Sykkuno pokes right back at you.

You share another laugh before getting back to trying to make the Raft as big and confusing as ever. Some more time goes by as you head onto your 4th island this stream.

“Hey Corpse, can you get an axe from the Raft when you get onto the island? I forgot to bring one.” You don’t think much of not giving him a nickname like everyone has one. Well you do, more so you can’t bring yourself to give him one, because you are currently harboring a crush for him. Which means calling him an affectionate nickname, feels like lying to yourself about a future that will never happen.

This goes on for the rest of the stream, nobody mentions it, but in the goodbye section of the stream, everyone is on edge but you. The rest convinced that you have something against Corpse, including Corpse. Especially Corpse.

You stay in voice chat so the 5 of you can bid goodbye without your individual audiences listening in.

“Hey thanks for today, it was a good stream!” You cheerfully tell the others.

“Y/N, what was that?” Rae is the first to ask, bringing the issue the rest has had on their minds since the beginning of the stream.

“What was what?”

“What was not giving Corpse a nickname? You give everyone a nickname. If you look on twitter, there are already people asking if you don’t like him.”

“Rae, I can talk for myself, you don’t have to give me a nickname Y/N.” Corpse adds onto the conversation, now that you think about it, the upbeat mood of the stream has started to falter out towards the end of the stream.

“I’m so sorry Corpse! It wasn’t meant like that not at all! I don’t hate you!” You are quick to respond. If you could see Rae right now, you would be able to see her face, realizing what was going on.

“You know what, how about we leave the two of you to talk it out? Yeah? Yeah.” She quickly kicks Toast and Sykkuno from the call and then leaves herself. Before any of you get a chance to say goodbye.

“So… We are alone now…” You try to break the silence.

Corpse doesn’t respond, he can feel himself starting to go through the worst-case scenarios. That you hate him, and don’t want to be friends anymore. He thought the two of you had become close.

“Corpse I’m sorry, I hope you didn’t start to doubt yourself. I didn’t mean to make you feel like this, I’m so sorry. I’ll release a statement or something. I can fix this. I promise.” You have already thrown yourself straight into panic mode, especially after what Rae said about people thinking you hate Corpse.

Corpse can’t help sigh of relief when you start apologizing, “Y/N it’s alright, but why don’t I have a nickname?” Corpse is unsure if this is alright to ask, he wants to know, the two of you have been friends for close to half a year now, and you usually have a nickname for people with in your first time streaming or playing with them.

“I don’t think that’s something we should talk about over discord.” That was how the conversation dried up, a bit of small talk happened before the two of you bid your goodbyes. Leaving you frustrated over knowing Corpse would only think the worst.

The air between you two had thickened after that day, and everyone you ended up streaming with could feel it, while the two of you could hide it from your fans, your friends was a whole other thing. They had caught on to the two of you not being on the best speaking terms.

You wanted to explain yourself but felt that it was better to do face to face. He wanted to tell you he missed talking like the two of you used to do.

Then a chance finally came, Rae was hosting a party, and you were invited. Your first reaction to hearing it was asking if Corpse was coming too. Rae had told you he said yes, so you booked a ticket to the big city from your small town in Colorado. You would be able to stay at the collab house with Rae.

You were excited to meet the others again, you had only been able to meet up with Rae twice before. So, this was a good chance for you to talk to the others some more, and not to mention come clean to Corpse.

You settled down in Rae’s room quickly, and greeted everyone as you walked around the house, waiting for more guest to arrive. You kept looking for Corpse. Making you not the greatest conversational partner as you barely listened, only agreeing, and disagreeing on the right times.

You notice his mop of black curls quickly when he comes into the living room. You immediately leave the conversation you were barely listening to, you try to wave him down, but he doesn’t seem to have noticed you.

You head his way instead; he’s currently talking a bit to Rae probably thanking her for inviting him. You stand a bit to the side not saying anything just waiting for your turn, as to not interrupt their conversation. Rae points to you, and wave you down. You try to act surprised, not just having stood there like a stalker and watched their entire conversation.

��Hey,” you smile at him, and he returns it.

“I’ll leave you to it.” Rae walks away, totally not having planned this so the two of you could meet. Rae had after the awkward conversation gotten the real reason out of you why you didn’t want to give Corpse a nickname. While she had enjoyed teasing you about your crush, she had never spoken a word to anyone else about it.

“So… we finally meet.” You try to break the ice.

“We do, do you want to go outside?”

“Oh, thank god, yes.” You follow after him, not noticing Rae pointing the two of you leaving to go outside to Sykkuno that she might have told your secret to by accident.

You find a bench and settle down, the weather being pretty decent, no wind to be felt.

“You said, you wanted to talk about what has been bothering you face to face?” Corpse gets straight to the thing that’s on both of your minds.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about it, I really am, I’m sorry, I know I’ve been cryptic and-”

“You don’t have to keep apologizing, we’re friends. Don’t apologize for existing.” Corpse reassures you.

“Yeah, sorry about that… I don’t know how to tell you this, and I really don’t want to ruin our friendship and I mean that. And I realized I had caught feelings for you, it wasn’t on purpose I swear.”

“Why would-”

“Please let me finish before you ask anything.” You look at him pleading. He nods to let you continue. “I didn’t want to give you a nickname, and I know that’s my entire brand at this point… I just couldn’t get myself to call you something affectionate and keep it platonic in my mind. Because I wanted more, I still do. I don’t want to just be your friend, and I don’t want to ruin what we have, because you are a good friend, one of my best.” You rub your hands over your face.

You can feel the awkwardness radiating off Corpse.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” You get off the bench and prepare to walk away when Corpse grabs around your wrist.

“Didn’t I tell you not to apologize for existing.” You can’t help but laugh a dry laugh, you can feel the tears ready themselves as you wait for the inevitable rejection.

“Corpse, don’t drag this out. I like you okay, and I don’t want to be more hurt over it.” You try to tug your hand to yourself.

“What if I like you too?” He might not have been as in tune with his feelings as you had. However, he had come to realize he had feelings for you. They had crept up on him in the form of suddenly missing you whenever you hung up after talking. They had come at him slow and over a long time, while your feeling had washed over you as a tsunami coursing through your heart.

“Corpse, it’s okay, just let me down gently.” You take you free hand to dry the tears that are now seemingly escaping.

“No Y/N, what if I like you too. Because I do. I like to hear your laugh, I like when we talk so far into the night I can hear your roommates alarm go off. I like when you say my name, even if I was you would give me a nickname.” He can’t help but chuckle. “ I like you Y/N.”

Your tears are now streaming out not of sadness but of the pure happy feeling of having your feeling returned from the guy you never thought who would return them.

He pulls you into a hug.

You can’t help but whisper to him.

“I like you Corpse.”

“I like you too Y/N.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

#corpse husband #corpse husband x y/n #corpse #corpse husband fanfic #corpse fic #corpse husband fanfiction #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse husband fic #gender neutral!reader #delias own writing #corpse husband imagine

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apocalypticgargoyle · 3 years

Text

𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞: 𝐏𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐘. 𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐲!𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐥

edit by ☄️ anon GOD BLESS

Hi everyone! Sorry to do another speed round of edgy!Karl hcs but I have a bunch that are sorta similar so, please enjoy jealous edgy!boy :)

Each section is divided off by a new request, hope you enjoy!

warnings: blood, degradation, jealousy, todd not getting his redemption arc yet, fighting, mentions of alcohol, angst

hiii! i was wondering if you can make something like, Karl getting jealous at Todd, when y’all play spin the bottle with other people? if not that’s totally okay :) @boxxedlikeafish

You sat on the floor between Karl’s legs as a massive group formed around the coffee table in the center of the party, the bass of the music making you sway slightly. Karl’s hand settled into the crook of your neck, the coolness from his rings sending goosebumps across your skin. He bent to your level, to whisper in your ear. “I hope you get to make out with the frat president,” he mocked, making you nudge his leg.

You tilted your head up to him, lips barely brushing against his. “Why? You wanna watch me kiss your superior?”

He smugly looked at you. “It’s a power thing for me. You can kiss him all you want because I know how into me you are.” You bit your lip at his words, heat coursing through you. “Plus, if you get too out of hand, I can always remind you who you belong to,” he stated, teasingly grabbing your neck, making you giggle.

One of Karl’s frat brothers polished off his bottle setting it in the center of the table on his side. “Everyone give your verbal consent to the game, and please for the love of God, only use tongue a few times,” he stated, making the circle laugh as everyone agreed. You were always shocked at the size of the parties they threw, especially because of how many people showed up. Looking around the group, you knew most of the girls had wandered in on their own merit and not as guests of the Brothers. But who were you to judge?

A few turns passed before the bottle came to you. You leaned towards it, flicking the bottle to get a good spin on it before the end tilted and pointed directly at Todd. The crowd oohed and mocked like they had with everyone, people getting more and more buzzed as you got deeper into the game. You side-eyed Karl as Todd acted out lassoing you and bringing you towards him.

You played along, climbing into Todd’s lap dramatically before pressing your lips to his briefly. He tasted like cheap beer and stale weed, which only made you pull away from him quicker. He pretended to dig his face into your shirt, making you laugh and push his face away. You climbed off of him and moved to sit between Karl’s legs again; him leaning his elbows on his knees and digging his fingers into your shoulders. “Fuckin’, tease,” he grumbled, pressing his lips against your neck as the game continued.

First time making a request but all this joking makes me wanna see Todd included,,,, like readers got a bit of an exhibition kink and I can definitely see an extension on making him jealous...-🐇

Later in the night, Karl’s arms wrapped around your waist, dancing with you to the music thumping over the loudspeakers in the massive crowd of people. You looked to the side, feeling eyes on your shoulder before meeting Todd’s gaze, his sights tracing your body. Karl’s lips pressed against your neck, teeth threatening to nip at the skin.

You eyed Todd, tilting your head to give Karl more room. Your fingers drifted up his neck to run into his hair. Todd’s body seemed to tense slightly where he was standing in his entourage. His breath hitched as the two of you made eye contact, Karl’s fingers digging into your clothing.

You lost sight of Todd, focusing instead on the feeling of Karl’s body pressed against yours, the warmth from his breath cascading over your skin. Another body was added to the mix, hands resting on your sides before Karl pushed off whoever it was.

You turned, looking over your shoulder to see Todd laughing. “Can I join?” He asked, stepping toward you again.

Karl exhaled deeply, rolling his eyes at the man. “Don’t make me punch you again,” Karl grumbled to Todd, grabbing your hand and pulling you behind him before he lost his temper.

bestie i need something about todd getting too close to the reader and then karl gets jealous and gets in his face.... i need anything... headcanons... a side piece... crumbs -🌞

tw: blood, fighting

Karl moved to leave the room, brushing past Todd who gripped onto his shoulder. Karl squeezed your hand before letting go and standing up straighter. Todd smugly looked at Karl, eyeing you with a small wink as your eyebrow raised at the two. You hadn’t seen the two fight yet, but with the way that the other frat brothers were reacting, it seemed better to get out of the way when they got too close to each other.

“What’d you say?” Todd asked, voice barely audible as he tilted his head at Karl, who looked at him almost as if he was bored.

Karl cleared his throat, stature dripping with confidence and displeasure. “I said don’t make me fuckin’ punch you again, asshole,” he answered almost stoically. Todd chuckled darkly, crossing his arms.

He wet his lips. “Poor little, Karl. Can’t take a joke.” Karl blinked, rolling his eyes and continuing in the direction he was previously headed. You followed, practically seeing the steam roll off his shoulders. “Oh come on! Where’s the smart ass quip we all love you for?” Todd called after him.

You gritted your teeth as Karl turned lazily. “You wouldn’t get it anyway,” he answered plainly with a small shrug. He let out a small snort, leaning back on the balls of his feet. “Yeah, that big meat head’s just for show, isn’t it?” He mocked, making a few of the party-goers around you chuckle.

Todd chuckled lightly, taking a few steps closer to the two of you before ramming his head into Karl’s face. Panic shot through your veins as Karl took the impact, blood beginning to gush from his mouth and nose. You were pushed to the side as you swore you could see Karl smirking at Todd, spitting on the floor beside him.

Before you knew it, the sound of bone contacting bone rang through the air. Karl shook the pain out of his hand and bounced back on his feet, pushing the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows as he waited for Todd’s retaliation. Todd drew the back of his hand across his nose, mopping up some of the blood with his sweatshirt before lunging at Karl’s mid-section, taking the two of them to the ground. With a knee to the gut, Karl gained dominance against Todd, wailing on him a few times before someone pulled them apart.

The fight was over almost as quickly as it started and from the looks of it, Karl had taken the upper hand. As the two of you left for his car, he laced his fingers with yours, still amped up from the adrenaline. It began to rain lightly as he opened the passenger door for you.

Before you could slide in, his eyes searched your face, creased with worry at what’d you witnessed. He curled his fist into the front of your jacket, pressing his lips against yours. He tasted like blood and alcohol; the heat from his mind seemingly rolling into his kiss as if to tell you he cared for you but his frustration was almost unbearable.

okay so edgy!karl and you have a fight cause you pushed too far with flirting with todd. he gets angy and then he yells and you flinch?? demeanor changes and TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF LIKE TEETH ARE DEAD FLUFF - 🐓

tw: angst, fluff

The car ride back to your apartment was silent, leaving you fidgety as Karl’s hand rested on your knee. The action in the past used to insinuate a different meaning, but you could tell he was genuinely angry. You let one of your hands move to his wrist, thumb rubbing against his arm as if to tell him you were sorry, but his grip on the steering wheel only tightened as he bit his tongue. You were careful to avoid his bruising knuckles, discoloration beginning to settle in even though he didn’t show any signs of discomfort.

You yearned to know what was swimming through his head, your mind retracing your steps with Todd. You had only been joking around, mockingly kissing his cheek and wrapping yourself around his arm. In the past, it had usually sparked sexual tension between you and Karl (more than what already existed) so, why not play around.

You shut your apartment door behind the two of you, eyes watching carefully as he pulled off his wet jacket and hung it up on one of the hooks. You weren’t scared of him, you were scared of the fact that he was so quiet. He was never that quiet, so something was brewing on the horizon.

You chewed the inside of your cheek. “Can we talk about it now?” You mumbled, gaze focused on the view of his jaw tensing before he met your eyes.

“I don’t know why you fuck around with that prick,” he bit. “Do you not get that I literally hate it when you hang all over that guy when I’m right there.” He rolled his head on his shoulders, back popping slightly as if he’d been stiff before this conversation. “I’m not a jealous guy, really, I’m not. It’s just… him. It’s just Todd.”

You knotted your fingers together, eyes darting from his busted lip to the view of his hands. “I’m sorry. I thought we were like… I thought it was like a turn-on…”

He scoffed. “No,” he answered plainly. “It was funny at first because I knew you were joking and everything but... Jesus.”

“Karl, I wouldn’t ever-”

He cut you off, his voice raising suddenly in slight frustration. “That's not the point! I know that!” You flinched at the volume, shocking the two of you as his eyes softened, guilt pulsing in his irises. “I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“No, no. I don’t know why I flinched. I think you just startled me a little,” you quietly brushed, one of your arms crossing over your chest to grab at your elbow.

He stepped forward, his shoulders angling towards you before wrapping you in his arms, fingers weaving into your clothing. You inhaled his cologne deeply, digging your nose into the crook of his neck as he sighed apologetically. “Baby, I’m sorry.”

You pushed your hands beneath his dark sweater, pressing your fingers to the warmth of his back. “I’m sorry. I don’t know when to stop before I take a joke too far,” you muttered, voice muffled in his embrace. He pressed his lips against your shoulder; there was no way he couldn’t smell Todd on you, only making your gut twist in knots more, but he didn’t say anything about it. “I love you,” you mumbled.

“Oh, Jesus fucking Christ, TOO EARLY,” your roommate wailed from her spot halfway down the steps.

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@mrwinemaker @madsbbg @idiotinnit @xxtakechancesxx @westyywifee @kiritokunuwu @theholycakehole @itgetsatadhazy @himbobimboeater @karlkitten @pluto-dizzz @twist3dtinkerbell @more-like-reyna @teenage0jealousy @deepestofwaters @honk-izzie-was-taken @froggyy06 @ghoulandghost @instabull @glowstick-cafe

#edgy!karl #edgy!karl jacobs #karl jacobs x reader #karl jacobs smut #karl jacobs x you #mcyt x reader #karl jacobs fanfic #karl jacobs fluff #mcyt fanfiction #mcyt imagine #mcyt smut #🐇 anon #🌞 anon #🐓 anon #cult of todd #☄️ anon

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extremelyblackandwhite · 3 years

Text

falling.

pairing: carter baizen x reader

warnings: angst, cheating (sorta?)

part 1 / part 2

and it kills me 'cause i know we've run out of things we can say. what am i now? what am i now? what if i'm someone i don't want around? i'm falling again, i'm falling again, i'm falling. what if i'm down? what if i’m out? what if i'm someone you won't talk about? i'm falling again, i'm falling again, i'm falling and i get the feeling that you'll never need me again ...

Stay away from me. I don’t want to see your face.

Those words were burned and scarred onto his mind and no matter how much he drank, how much he smoked, how much he slept, he could still hear her voice echoing those same words which hit him like daggers. She’d meant those words, he knew her well enough to know when she meant something and she had meant every single letter of every single word she had muttered. He couldn’t escape them and the worse thing was, he couldn’t escape her face. He hadn’t seen her in the last three months but he couldn’t forget the look on her face, the look of disappointment and hurt. He was used to disappointing his family, that’s all he could do but he’d never disappointed her before. She’d been upset at him, he’d been upset at her but they’d never been disappointed at each other. They’d always been there for each other but now she was just gone and he daren’t even try approaching her. He knew her threats weren’t empty and he knew way too well not to mess with Y/N. She was sweet but at the end of the day she was a Vanderbilt heiress and if you got on her bad side, you could easily see it. Yet, that didn’t mean he didn’t miss her.

How could he not when she had been around since the very moment they were introduced for each other? He couldn’t really explain what they were and he didn’t want to dwell on it, he’d rather think to himself that she was gone rather than admit he was the one responsible for it. After all, wasn’t that what he always did? Run away from his problems and avoiding them, instead creating even more issues. It was easier after all. However, what he did not expect was to find her doing the exact same and he couldn’t help but admit how angry he was to see her with someone else. At Cotillion, with Chuck, it was easy to know it was nothing; after all, everyone with a pair of eyes knew all Chuck Bass was interested in was Blair and once Nate was off the picture, the two immediately became a thing. But now? Now he couldn’t convince himself of it, he couldn’t tell himself that she was trying to make him jealous as she stepped into a MET exhibition accompanied by someone whom he didn’t know. A Kennedy, he had heard, and how could Carter compete with a Kennedy? He could not but seeing his Y/N with someone else made his blood boil and his grip tight around the champagne glass. Clearly he had forgotten he was here with someone else as well, yet, that didn’t mattered. What mattered was that his Y/N was with someone else.

He hadn’t even want to come to this exhibition in the first place, he’d even tried to argue it out with Serena yet it was no use, he was here now and he could see it; he could see them. He could see the man pointing to his Y/N introducing her to everyone in the room as if she didn’t already know them. And that smile, that smile that always got him to do anything she wanted. A smile that was for him no longer yet looked his way and faltered. He downed the cold champagne in his glass, staring back at her before she moved her gaze away, hand wrapped around her date’s arm. Carter shoved the champagne glass on one of the floating silver trays before making his way through the crowd like a wolf hunting its sheep until she reached her. Whomever she was with had left her alone, probably to get some drinks but he didn’t care.

- We need to talk.

- No, we do not. - she grabbed a canape from a passing tray, a habit she had whenever she was uncomfortable at parties.

- Can you at least give me that? You ruined my family’s appearances at social events, you made your point. You owe me a talk.

- That’s rich. - she looked over her shoulder, hoping her date would come and interrupt their interaction.

- Please. - his eyes scanned hers for any softness which still laid for him, yet he couldn’t read her eyes. They were hooded and hidden by thick black shadow and dark eyeliner which took away from how watery and bright they usually were, from how happy he remembered them. It’d been a long, long three months and part of him hopped all the care she had once held from him hadn’t died. He still held her in high regard and while he didn’t expect her for even care for him anymore, part of him still hoped she wouldn’t let him bleed out if she found him wounded. However, Y/N was much too smart to let her own emotions take over her in public situations and so she walked away.

Her gown dragged away all her insecurities and all the faltering which still seemed to dance around her whenever he was around, yards and yards of fabric dragged all that was bubbling all the way to her throat and she found herself walking faster and faster to the bathroom. Her hands flew to the porcelain sink, holding herself up as if the weight of all she had ignored for the past three months was pushing her down into the centre of the Earth. Her head snapped up, watching her reflection in the golden mirror; she thought maybe if she could see how pathetic she looked, she would snap out of it.

- Y/N. - her grip on the porcelain tightened up as she turned her head to see him against the closed door.

- I hate you. - she almost barked those words at him, voice filled with poison as if she had wanted to say them a long time ago. His eyes softened, corners looking down, a far cry from how unreadable he always was. - With every fibre of my being, I hate you.

- Fine. - he made his way towards her, standing by her side. - I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I hurt you. I never meant to hurt you.

- You humiliated me in front of everyone. - her eyes looked into his for the first time that night, old wounds still not completely wounded. - You kissed me in Santorini when you were with Serena. You are a bad person, Carter.

- I know but I wasn’t with her like I was with you.

- Details of your relationship do not interest me, Carter. If you wanna talk about your relationship, I’d suggest couples therapy.

- We weren’t a couple in Santorini, Y/N. Did you seriously think I would’ve done that to you?

- I don’t know you. - she spewed those words, letting go of the sink and walking backwards, away from him. - I don’t even trust you, Carter.

- I hope you know I’m not asking for forgiveness from you. I’m just apologising.

- I don’t need your apology, I need you away from me. I want you away from me.

- You’re spoiled, you know that? - he pointed his finger at her. - Just because the whole world revolves around your family does not mean I’ll stop going places just because you don’t want to see me. You don’t get to decide what I do!

- For someone who hates this lifestyle, you seem so bothered. - she stood there, not completely happy with the adjective he’d just placed upon her. Y/N Archibald was many things, but spoiled was not one of them. No matter how many riches she had, she did not expect the world to bend to her will. - Why are you here if you’re just going to criticise me anyway?

The two of them remained in that match, almost to see which one of them could hurt the one the most, as if hurting each other would somehow make the fact they weren’t together hurt any less. The truth was, both of them were stubborn individuals and while Y/N had been the most forgiving of the two, seeing the man she had always hoped would someday be hers with someone else had almost erased all of that. Maybe she was spoiled for expecting him to someday magically want her by his side but he was spoiled too. They were two flawed human beings staring each other, waiting to see which one would break apart first until he realised one thing; he did not want to see her break apart. He was bitter, angry at her even but deep down he knew there was no one to be angry at but himself. He had caused this and he was lashing out at her, hoping that by hurting her, he’d feel better about her hating him so much. However, he did not want to hurt her. At least no more than he’d already done, either willingly or unwillingly.

- You win. - he lowered down his hands in defeat. Y/N, however remained still yet if one were to touch her arm, they could feel she was trembling. - I can’t fight with you any longer.

He almost left her there standing, not sure of what to say. He really was going to leave, he was going to disappear for a while yet his decision faltered as his eyes almost too quickly scanned her, noticing the thin gold bracelet around her wrist. He had given her that bracelet, something he’d got from one of his first travels to Europe. It was nothing too special, in all honesty, compared to what she was wearing, it was probably the cheapest thing she had on her person but he remembered that bracelet way too well. He remembered giving her the small little bag, her little argument about how he shouldn’t have gotten something for her, how she promised she’d never take it off. She still had it, she still wore it.

- You’re wearing the bracelet I gave you. - he pointed towards her wrist and she immediately covered it, looking at it for a bit before looking up at him.

- Fine. - her voice almost broke as she tried to undo the clasp.

- Don’t. - his voice however broke down as she found the clasp. - You promised.

Her aura softened, shoulders lowering to a neutral position as her hand unwrapped from her wrist, her eyes gazing the shiny gold metal before she looked up and at him. Whatever fire her anger had ignited within her went down, washed away like the waves onto the sand and for the first time she moved forward until she was close enough to feel his breathe on her face. Her eyes heightened up to his, lips half parted as her hands cupped his face, the same face she had seen grow older over these years yet remain the same blue eyes which were so typically his. Her finger grazed his cheekbone, the mere action making him nuzzle his face against her warm. She always had warm hands and the both of them no longer wanted to fight. She was tired and Carter was deadly afraid of not ever talking to her again, he could not lose her. He did not want to lose her.

There was no sound, not even the soft music outside seemed to break the silence, all that was around was their breathing, soft and slow. Her eyes moved from his to his lips, pink tinted, tainted with the taste of champagne which she could smell from his breathe. Soft emotion filled eyes looked his for a second before she moved closer, closing the distance between them. Her hands moved from his chest to rest against his chest as she tasted the champagne on his lips. His hands held her waist flush to him, before he two broke off the kiss, foreheads leaned against each other.

- Don’t leave.

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junghelioseok · 4 years

Text

covenant.

↳ your best friend’s engagement forces you to reevaluate your own feelings.

◇ hoseok x reader ◇ smut | angst | werewolf!au | f2l!au ◇ 16.4k [1/1]

⇢ arguably also an arranged marriage!au, ft. kinda sorta dumbasses to lovers? a very, very late bday fic for the most beautiful man in the universe and my favorite funky lil dancer. ♡

notes: i started this in my drafts well over three months ago and all it said was “this ain’t gonna be on time for hobi’s bday i can feel it” and damn if past!me wasn’t right on the money!!! this has undergone three edits, going from 14.6k to 16.4k somehow, and i am going to lose my whole damn mind if i don’t just post it so here it is! hope you enjoy!

warnings: dom!hobi, alpha!hobi, bit of dirty talk, oral (f receiving), some grinding against hobi’s thigh, knotting, hobi’s got a big dick idk, also he’s in heat!!! but things eventually get really soft bc i love him and am a Soft Bitch™ 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s going to rain.

You can smell it in the air and feel the damp chill against your skin, permeating through every layer of your clothing. The surrounding forest and all its occupants seem to be collectively holding their breath, waiting for the first drops to come. Even your footsteps, soft as they are against the loamy earth, sound much too loud in the hush that’s fallen. Dark clouds gather overhead, looming like an omen, and you silently reach into your purse to check that the umbrella you’d stowed this morning is still there. Vaguely, you wonder if it’s big enough for two.

Around you, the trees slowly begin to dwindle, until there’s only open sky above your head and a wide grassy expanse beneath your feet. A certain heaviness lingers in the air here—a low thrum of energy, born from the ancient magic that sleeps in the gnarled roots of the tree that sits in the center of the clearing. You can feel it prickling along your skin, raising gooseflesh and igniting your veins, and the closer you get, the stronger the feeling becomes.

At the far end of the clearing, you spot a small crowd of people, all clad in black. Your best friend—and your entire reason for venturing out today—stands amongst them in a tailored suit, his black tie snug at his throat and laid atop a charcoal gray shirt. He’s chatting with his father and a few other family members, seemingly calm and collected, but you can tell from the sloppy knot of his tie and the way he fidgets with the hem of his jacket that he is anything but. After all your years of friendship, you can read Jung Hoseok like a book. His auburn hair is disheveled as if he’s been incessantly raking his fingers through it, and even at a distance, you can sense the turmoil in his aura, haloing him like the stormy clouds overhead.

Sensing your approach, Hoseok’s gaze flickers up to meet yours. He raises a hand in greeting and bids farewell to the people he’d been chatting with, picking his way over to you with a wan smile.

“Hey. You made it.”

“I wouldn’t miss this,” you reply, reaching out to take his hand. It’s warm and strong as always, but you don’t miss the slight tremor in his grip. “How are you holding up?”

He shrugs half-heartedly, a sigh escaping his lips and dissipating into mist in the wintry air. “As well as can be expected, I guess. It just… it all happened so fast.”

“I know,” you murmur, twining your fingers together in quiet reassurance. “I’m so sorry, Hobi.”

“Thanks.”

Slowly, his gaze flits to the center of the clearing where the ancient tree sits, traversing from the leafy canopy all the way down to where the gnarled roots disappear into the dirt. In its shadow sits a polished wooden casket, and you squeeze Hoseok’s hand gently as he walks closer, his eyes beginning to glisten.

“I still can’t believe he’s gone, you know,” he mumbles. “All these years of war, of negotiations and peace talks, finally seeing the Accords pass and the company flourish… and now he’s gone. Cancer. Just like that.”

His voice cracks on the last sentence, and you clasp his hand a little tighter. You know as well as he does that a healthy werewolf can live for well over a century, if not for the human genetics that remain susceptible to human weaknesses and disease. True immortality afflicts only the faeries and the vampires of your world—and even then, there are still ways that those folk can die.

“He lived a long life,” you say after a moment’s hesitation, grasping onto any semblance of comfort you can offer. Together, you and Hoseok come to a stop in the shadow of the tree, peering at the closed casket where his grandfather lays. “And it was a good, just life. Not all of us can say that.”

A lone, wet droplet falls onto the polished mahogany, and Hoseok hastily wipes his eyes, tilting his head skyward. “Not long enough,” he whispers. “He still had so much to do. I… I still have so much I wanted to do—to say. And now I’ll never be able to.”

You caress a thumb across his knuckles, the motion soft and tender. “I know. And I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do.”

Hoseok glances down at that, a glimmer of something manic and desperate swimming in his amber-flecked irises. “You could,” he says, grabbing both your hands and clutching them to his chest like a lifeline. “You could bring him back. You know how, don’t you?”

You shake your head sadly, hating the way his frown deepens as you free yourself from his grasp. “That’s forbidden magic, Hobi. That’s necromancy. You know I can’t do that.”

Hoseok’s entire body sags, his shoulders slumping as he lets out a heavy sigh. Instinctively, you step forward to wrap him in a hug, and he loops his arms around your waist automatically, pulling you flush against him. “I know,” he mumbles into your hair. Then he huffs out a dry chuckle, humorless and deprecating. “Fuck. I’m a mess, huh?”

You don’t answer. You don’t need to. Instead, you hold him a little tighter, rubbing his back soothingly in long, slow motions—the same way his mother used to do during bedtime. His heart thuds erratically in his chest, fast and frenzied like a caged bird, but lulls as you continue your ministrations, settling into an even rhythm once more.

“Thank you,” he murmurs after a few moments, his warm breath caressing your cheek. “For coming today. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“You can do anything, Hobi,” you reassure, running a thumb along the sharp line of his jaw when he raises his head to look at you. “With or without me. But… you’re welcome, all the same.”

Your presence at this funeral is unusual, and both you and Hoseok know it. Werewolf packs tend to keep their rites and ceremonies private, and the Gwangju pack is no different. Led by Hoseok’s father, and his late grandfather before him, the werewolves of the city have rapidly risen to prominence and power, aided in large part by the founding of JungTech. The company, started by Hoseok’s grandfather, began as a small operation in a battered old warehouse, but quickly grew to become one of Gwangju’s biggest corporations after the signing of the Accords twenty years ago. The peace treaty marked the start of a tenuous coexistence between humankind and Shadowfolk, and, together with your fellow witches—along with the werewolves, vampires, and the few fair folk who decided to leave their homes deep in the forests—you migrated into cities all over the country to forge new lives.

It’s proven easier for some. While the wolves of the city have found tolerance—acceptance, even—you have not fared quite as well. Humans, you have found, tend to fear the ancient magic that runs through your veins. Though nothing you’ve faced comes remotely close to what your ancestors faced in centuries past, you remain wary of those who take a little too much interest in your abilities.

You’re a bit paranoid, your familiar, Bast, has remarked on more than one occasion. But it’s justified, so I suppose it’s all right.

As if sensing that your thoughts have turned to him, Bast stirs in the back of your mind. You feel him yawn and stretch lazily before there’s a tug on the soles of your feet, as if the force of gravity has suddenly, inexplicably doubled. Then he’s materializing—morphing out of the spot where your shadow would be if the sun were shining, taking the form of an inky black cat with sharp, golden eyes. Hoseok perks up when Bast loops between his ankles, and immediately squats down to scratch behind his ears, a small smile settling across his face as a low, content purr rumbles up from beneath his fingertips. From elsewhere in the clearing, a single howl rises up into the air, forlorn and wavering.

It’s starting, Bast says in your head. At the same time, Hoseok straightens to his full height, fiddling with the hem of his black jacket and looking over at you tentatively.

“Sounds like they’re getting started,” he says.

You nod. “I should go.”

Hoseok opens his mouth as if to protest—as if to say no, stay—but you know better and cut him off with a single raised finger.

“I’ll go,” you murmur. “This is a private rite, and I don’t want to break centuries of tradition by overstaying my welcome. Go join your pack, Hobi.”

“Will I see you later?”

“Without a doubt.”

Your parting gesture is to reach out and grab his hand, tucking a little drawstring bag into his palm and closing his fingers over it. “Valerian root and chamomile,” you tell him gently, taking in his rumpled collar and the dark bags beneath his eyes. “Make some tea tonight. It’ll help.”

Hoseok swallows and nods, his features softening as he gazes down at his hand cupped in your smaller ones. He looks like he wants to say something, but another howl interrupts, disrupting whatever thoughts he may have had. Instead, he nods again, murmuring a soft goodbye before turning on his heel to join the rest of the pack gathering around the raised casket. You turn as well, leaving behind the ancient clearing with Bast trotting by your side.

Up above, the heavens finally open, drenching the dirt path beneath your feet with rain. And behind you, the single howl is joined by dozens more, echoing mournfully up into the weeping sky.

///

You’re in the middle of straightening out a display of dittany when the kettle begins to boil, emitting three short, shrill whistles accompanied by a long stream of whirling steam. When silence falls over the shop once more, you wander over to where the kettle sits—atop a small wooden end table next to an old wardrobe. It’s an old relic that’s been passed down through generations of witches in your family, wrought out of silvery metal and suspended in an iron frame above a single lit candle. The flame is glowing pink, flickering in a nonexistent gust of wind, and you smile. Quietly, you grab two teacups from a nearby shelf.

Not two seconds later, the door of the old wardrobe creaks open, revealing the familiar face of Kim Seokjin behind it. A fellow witch and a good friend of yours, Jin has made a name for himself as a baker, running a café in Seoul that offers all sorts of confections—both with magical properties and without. His hair is dyed a muted dusty rose—a stark contrast to the casual black hoodie and jeans he’s wearing—and you reach out to push a stray lock back from his forehead in lieu of a greeting.

“Your hair’s pink again,” you remark. “I like it.”

Jin grins, his plush lips pulling back to reveal perfect teeth. “Thanks.” Carefully, he steps out of the wardrobe and shuts the door behind him. A beat of silence passes, and you take the opportunity to select a canister of tea leaves. You don’t miss the flicker of solemnity that settles into Jin’s features, though, listening as he clears his throat before voicing the question that is undoubtedly the reason behind his unexpected visit.

“So. How’s Hoseok holding up?”

Jin has never been one to mince his words. You suppose you appreciate that about him.

Quietly, you lift the kettle out of its stand and beckon for him to join you at the little wooden table at the front of your shop. It’s tucked neatly into the nook carved out by one of the two bay windows on either side of the front door, flanked by two well-worn, mismatched chairs. Atop it sits a pile of books—everything from ancient remedies to common household spells.

One book in particular always sits open—a detailed list of all the herbs and plants you carry in your shop, along with the various concoctions you’ve created with them. Hellebore, the spine of the book reads, and it’s the same word that graces your storefront in flowing, golden text. An apothecary of sorts, you spend your days dealing out potions and remedies to those in need, both human and Shadowfolk. You do your best to help, for all the times modern medicine has come up short and left someone wanting.

“Honestly? I don’t think he’s been sleeping.” You set the teacups down onto the table and fill them both before handing one over to Jin. “I saw him this morning, at the funeral. He looked exhausted.”

Jin’s brows disappear behind his pink hair. “You went to the funeral?”

“I didn’t stay,” you clarify, taking a sip of your tea. “Just wanted to drop by, say hello, and pay my respects.”

“Werewolves are a private bunch,” Jin remarks. “I’m surprised.”

You shrug. “Hoseok wanted me to be there. So I went.”

“I see.” He doesn’t say anything further, and neither do you, lapsing instead into a comfortable silence that’s broken only by the occasional sip of tea and the clinking of china. Your gaze wanders, drifting over to the front door of your shop, painted a cheerful green and set with a flowery stained glass window that throws kaleidoscopic rainbows across the cream walls and dark wooden floor. Sunlight streams through the wide bay windows, illuminating the interior in warm, hazy gold. On the other side of the room, Bast is curled up, fast asleep on his favorite plush bench beside the glass door that leads to the greenhouse, perfectly haloed by the sun.

“Must be nice being able to fall asleep anywhere,” you mutter, almost to yourself.

Jin hears you anyway, a chuckle escaping his lips. “You sound jealous.”

“Maybe I am,” you reply, laughing with him. “Speaking of which, where’s Adam? Did he stay home?”

Jin nods, jabbing his thumb in the direction of the wardrobe. “Yeah, he’s keeping an eye on the café. Told me to say hi to you for him, though.”

You giggle at the thought of Jin’s familiar, a long-haired sheepdog with a stubborn streak the size of the Nile and blatant disdain for following orders—especially those that come from Jin himself. “Keeping watch, or trashing the place?” you tease.

“With my luck, probably both,” Jin admits with a sigh. “I should probably get back there soon. He ate all the egg tarts last time.”

“Bring him with you next time,” you advise. “Bast will keep him entertained.”

He grins. “I don’t doubt it.”

Finishing off the last of his tea, he stands up and taps the rim of his cup, murmuring a soft cleaning spell under his breath. You smile gratefully as he replaces it back onto the shelf with the others, and stand to walk him back over to the wardrobe. Opening up the creaky door, you watch him clamber inside, standing amongst the hanging coats and the single pair of shoes on the bottom shelf.

“See you later,” you murmur. “Give Adam my best.”

Jin nods. “See you.”

He shuts the door, and you watch the flame of the candle once again turn a soft, roseate pink. It flickers briefly, dancing in an invisible breeze, before reverting back to the color of regular fire, signaling Jin’s departure. Quietly, you clean your own teacup and return it to the shelf.

The remainder of the afternoon passes with few customers, so you opt to close down early and head to your apartment, located up a short flight of stairs on the second floor of the shop. You’re rifling through the refrigerator for dinner ingredients and humming softly under your breath when your phone suddenly rings, Hoseok’s name lighting up the screen in bright white text. “Hey, Hobi,” you say, swiping across the glass to answer. “What’s up?”

On the other end of the line, Hoseok exhales shakily. “Can you come over?”

You blink, glancing at the darkening sky outside. “Now?”

“Yeah. Fuck, sorry. I know it’s late, but I really… I really need to talk to someone. I—” His voice cracks, and your heart sinks. “I need you.”

“Say no more.” Straightening up, you shut the refrigerator door and tug off your apron. “I’ll be there in half an hour. Have you eaten yet?”

Hoseok sighs. “No.”

“I’ll bring takeout,” you decide, already glancing around for your purse. “See you soon, okay?”

Bidding him farewell, you don your coat and head out the door, locking up behind you. Hoseok lives downtown in a sleek, modern penthouse that’s normally a twenty-minute walk away from Hellebore, but after stopping by the restaurant on the corner for food, you opt to catch the bus instead. Fifteen minutes after you hang up the phone, you are rapping the bronze knocker on Hoseok’s front door, a paper bag and a bottle of wine in hand.

Almost instantly, the door is flung open. Hoseok stands in the threshold as if he’s been waiting there, his auburn hair wild and his eyes even wilder. His aura is turbulent, and when he speaks, his voice is hoarse. “Hey.”

“Hey.” You raise the bag. “I brought dinner.”

“You’re the best,” he sighs, stepping aside to let you in.

Hoseok’s apartment toes the line between modern and cozy in a way that only Hoseok’s apartment could—with lush green plants and plushy, earth-toned furniture to offset the cold impersonality of the floor-to-ceiling windows and the stainless steel kitchen. Flicking on the kitchen light, you set the food down on the granite countertop and grab two wine glasses out of the cabinet. Hoseok sidles over as you pour a generous helping into each glass, rifling through the silverware drawer for utensils.

“Smells good,” he murmurs, popping a box open. “I’m starving. Thanks for bringing dinner.”

You brush off his gratitude and hand him a glass, raising yours so you can clink it gently against his. Quietly, the two of you fall into a comfortable routine, with Hoseok grabbing the food and you grabbing the bottle of wine to bring into the living room. You help him clear off the coffee table and arrange the food, then settle onto the couch beside him, sipping your drink in silence and patiently waiting for him to gather his thoughts. Years of friendship have taught you that he’ll talk when he’s ready, and you’re content to wait as long as he needs.

Sighing, Hoseok tips the rest of his wine back into his mouth before setting the empty glass down with a soft plink. “So,” he begins, not quite looking you in the eye. “My dad and I had lunch today.”

You stay quiet, waiting for him to continue. He takes several more seconds to muster up the words, and when he finally finds them, they’re exhaled in a tumbling rush. “He told me that he’s pleased with how I’m running JungTech. It’s been over a year, and things are going well… so he wants to expedite my takeover of the pack. In two months, he wants me to take over as the alpha. And…” He swallows. “He wants me to settle down.”

Perturbed, you blink. “What?”

Hoseok finally looks at you, his expression frighteningly devoid of emotion. “He wants me to get married, {Name}.”

Comprehension doesn’t settle in right away. But when it does, your jaw drops to the floor, landing somewhere alongside the ornamental persian carpet and a stray sock that has no doubt jumped ship from Hoseok’s laundry.

“W-what?” you manage after a few long seconds of gaping at him. “Why? Why now? That’s so… that’s completely out of the blue.”

Hoseok shakes his head, a few shaggy strands of auburn hair falling across his forehead and into his eyes. “It’s not, actually. He’s been talking about it for a long time—trying to arrange something with one of the other pack families. It’s tradition, you know? Mating within the pack, keeping the bloodlines pure through marriage. The difference is that Pops always talked him out of it. Always said I was too young, that there was no rush, that I should wait for someone I love, my true mate...” He sighs, heavily. “But he’s gone now. And Dad’s decided that he’s done waiting.”

You shouldn’t ask. You shouldn’t, because you know it’ll hurt, but the question comes regardless—leaving your lips in a near whisper. “Who?”

Hoseok takes a deep breath, his shoulders slumping as he exhales. “Do you remember Im Nayeon?”

You do. You’ve known Nayeon almost as long as you’ve known Hoseok—the three of you having attended the same schools starting from elementary all the way up until Hoseok left to attend university in Seoul. Admittedly, you were never close—and if you were completely honest, you always found her to be a bit disingenuous for your tastes. Nevertheless, you often found yourself at the same events—parties and gatherings you attended at Hoseok’s request, and that she was privy to due to her family’s high-ranking status within the Gwangju pack.

“I remember,” you tell him, your bottom lip finding its way between your teeth. “Does… does she know yet? Have you met up with her?”

Hoseok nods. “She was there this morning, at the funeral. We talked a little bit and got coffee after, but… this is all happening so fast.” Slowly, he tilts his head back to stare at the ceiling, a sigh escaping his parted lips. “But there’s nothing I can do, right? It’s enough that Dad’s somehow talked Mom into the whole thing, but now he’s gotten the Council on board too. Did you know that Nayeon has an uncle on the Council? It’s insane, right?”

“Insane,” you agree in a whisper, doing your best to ignore the way your heart is splintering at the edges.

“You know, I always thought my Dad pressuring me was bad.” Hoseok buries his face in his hands, peering at you from between his splayed fingers when you hum in acknowledgment. “But this? The entire Council on my back? This is way worse.”

“I’m sorry.” You don’t know what else there is to say. Your ribcage feels like it’s been split open and filled with burning coals, weighing hot and heavy on your insides.

Hoseok has dated in the past, of course. You both have—chasing that elusive, fluttery feeling called love and never quite being able to catch it and hold on. Hoseok’s last relationship fizzled long before he graduated from university, having lasted only about six months. You distinctly remember meeting the girl during one of your frequent visits to Seoul, at a small party hosted by Hoseok and his friends. By your next visit, however, things had already ended. He never really told you why the breakup occurred either—only that the relationship never would have lasted in the long run.

Perhaps foolishly, you chose not to pry.

“Is there anything I can do?” you ask softly. Reaching out, you take ahold of his hand and tug it into your lap, threading your fingers into the gaps between his. The gesture is familiar and comforting, like cocoa in front of a lit fireplace, and you can’t even begin to fathom the idea of another person sitting here and holding his hand in your stead.

“Just talk to me,” Hoseok entreaties, squeezing your fingers. “Distract me. What’s going on with you?”

You hum, swallowing down the lump in your throat and letting your head fall onto his shoulder as you pick through the events of the past week for the most interesting tidbits. “Bast has been bringing me dead rats lately,” you finally say, nose scrunching at the memory. “You should see the size of them—they’re almost bigger than he is. And they smell like the sewers, because I’m ninety-nine percent sure that’s where he’s getting them from. It’s horrid.”

Hoseok huffs out a stilted laugh. “Sewer rats? Gross.”

“It’s not all bad, to be honest,” you tell him, nestling a little closer to the warmth of his body. Hoseok keeps his apartment chillier than you’re accustomed to, and you’re beyond grateful for the furnace-like heat he gives off naturally. “The bones are pretty useful. The tails too, provided you don’t tell people what they actually are.”

His laugh is much more genuine this time. “Tricky little minx,” he says, amusement lacing his tone. “I’ve always liked that about you.”

You ignore the uptick in your heart rate at his approval, grateful that he can’t see your face as a pulse of heat flushes your cheeks. Instead, you burrow into the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent. Hoseok smells like the forest—fresh and woodsy, with a slight floral undercurrent from his fabric softener. It smells like home, and you smile when his arm comes up to wrap around your shoulders.

“Jin came by today,” you murmur.

“Yeah?” The monosyllabic response rumbles through his chest.

“Yeah. He asked about you, too. You should probably text him later.”

Hoseok hums a confirmation, and, satisfied, you cuddle a little closer to him. You pull at the afghan he keeps laid over the back of the couch, laying it comfortably over your lap as he rests his head gently atop yours, his ear pressed to your crown. Your eyes fall shut as you listen to the rhythmic thud of his pulse—solid and steady, backed by the soft hum of the refrigerator and distant traffic on the street far below.

It’s comfortable, sitting with him like this. Comfortable, stroking his arm with your fingertips, in time with the drumbeat of his heart. Ever so gradually, Hoseok’s breathing evens out, and you briefly think that you could stay like this—encapsulated in this delicate, iridescent bubble of contentment—for the rest of your life.

You know the thing about bubbles, though? Bast remarks dryly in your head. They burst.

I know, you sigh.

I know.

///

There’s something soothing about taking inventory—something calming in the repetition of walking down the aisles of Hellebore and restocking the shelves one by one. You’d woken this morning to an apologetic Hoseok making pancakes in the kitchen, his residual heat and woodsy scent lingering on the blanket tucked around your body. After a harried breakfast and a promise to text you later, Hoseok rushed off to the office.

You, in turn, returned to your shop, where you grabbed every ounce of cleaning supplies you possess and scrubbed the place from top to bottom, foregoing all of your usual dishwashing charms and dust-clearing jinxes. The physical labor is a welcome distraction from the events and revelations of last night, and you’ve thrown yourself wholeheartedly into all the chores you need to complete.

“Almost out of rosehip oil,” you mutter, eyeing the half-empty vial and making a note to extract more from one of several plants in your greenhouse. “Low on valerian too, hmm…”

The bell over the front door jingles merrily, diverting your attention away from your task. “{Name}?” a voice calls softly. A moment later, a familiar head of coppery red hair pops around the edge of the shelves, choppy bangs framing a soft, warm face. “Hey, there you are. You busy?”

You shake your head and shut your inventory book, setting it down on the nearest shelf. “Not terribly, no. What brings you here today, Lisa?”

Lisa’s answering smile is sheepish. “Got something to return,” she says, holding up a little glass jar full of lavender colored pills that you immediately recognize. “I’m guessing you’ve already heard the news. Looks like I won’t be needing these anymore, right?”

Your laugh sounds brittle, even to your own ears. “Right. Yeah. Not anymore.”

For just over ten years, Lisa has been the wolf assigned to help Hoseok through his heat. Between his family’s status and his longtime designation as the next alpha of the Gwangju pack, it’s imperative for Hoseok to avoid anything that might be perceived as scandalous. Torrid sex stories splashed across tabloid covers is the last thing a man like Hoseok needs, and that’s where Lisa comes in. Once a year, for three days, she goes to him, and no one is none the wiser. Her job is one that calls for the utmost discretion, and as the daughter of a high-ranking Council official, no one understood that better than she did. You’d only found out because of your role as one of the few witches in the country who makes and stocks the proper contraceptives for such wolves—the dosage much stronger than the human equivalent.

And when Lisa had first approached you to purchase the pills, you’d dropped two jars and nearly set fire to a third. Your stomach had fallen to somewhere around your toes, right alongside the shattered glass and little lavender tablets.

You’d chalked the accident up to surprise. Hoseok hadn’t mentioned anything to you, after all, and you’d known very little about the intricacies of werewolf heats back then, having just opened your shop at age eighteen. But surprise doesn’t explain the snaking jealousy that bubbles up in your tummy every time Lisa comes in to restock her supply of pills, nor does it explain the overwhelming sense of relief you feel now as she presses the unopened jar into your hands.

“I still can’t believe he’s going to be the most powerful man in Gwangju soon.” Lisa steps back, tucking her hair behind her ear and letting out a soft sigh. “And now he’s engaged, too. It’s pretty crazy, huh?”

“Crazy,” you agree tonelessly, turning to replace the jar onto the appropriate shelf.

Lisa, however, is nothing if not perceptive. A gentle hand lands on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks. “Hey,” she begins, soft and slow. “You know you can talk to me, right? Are you—?”

But the sound of the bell drowns out the rest of her question, metallic and bright in the quiet of your shop. “Hello? Anyone home?” a cheery voice asks.

“Be right there,” you say immediately, shrugging off Lisa’s hand and stepping out from amongst the shelves. There’s a young woman standing at the checkout counter, rifling through the collection of seeds on display, and you cringe as she replaces a few packets in the wrong spots. “How can I help you?”

At the sound of your voice, the woman turns gracefully on her heel, her expression a perfectly crafted amalgamation of surprise and delight. “{Name}!” she exclaims, stepping forward with an outstretched arm. “Long time no see!”

“N-Nayeon,” you stammer, the shock of seeing her face freezing you in place. “What… what brings you here?”

The dark-haired woman steps forward to pull you into a hug, enveloping you in her fruity perfume. “Would you believe me if I said I wanted to catch up with an old friend?” she asks playfully.

We were never friends, you want to say. In your head, Bast lets out a derisive snort of agreement. Lisa, you notice, has conveniently melted away somewhere amidst the organized chaos of your shop, disappearing into the myriad shelves and knickknacks.

“Plus, I really wanted to look at some flowers,” Nayeon continues, betraying her true purpose at last. “You’ve heard, haven’t you? About my engagement? I’m sure Hoseok—I mean, my fiancé—has mentioned it to you, of all people. You are his best friend, after all.”

The inside of the shop is beginning to feel stifling. Perspiration trickles down your neck and you tug at your collar, loosening the material from where it’s plastered against your skin. “Sure,” you manage, once you feel like you can breathe again. “Right. Sure. The flowers are right this way, if you want to follow me.”

I’d forgotten how much I don’t like her, your familiar remarks dryly in your head.

Shut up, Bast.

Mercifully, he does. There’s a tug on your feet, and you glance down just in time to see him morph out of the shadow you cast against the sun-drenched floor. Ghostly and amorphous at first, he quickly solidifies into the feline figure you’ve grown accustomed to, and slinks protectively around your ankles before darting off to perch in the cushioned bay window seat.

Conveniently, that’s also where the flower display is. Colorful blooms and trailing leaves adorn the wooden shelves and tables in this particular corner of the shop, and you force yourself to shift back into professional mode as you come to a stop in front of an assortment of honeysuckle. “So, what kind of flowers are you looking for?” you ask, brushing your fingers along the pale yellow petals.

Nayeon hums thoughtfully and picks up a potted rosebush, examining it from all angles. “Roses, maybe. Are roses too clichéd now?” She brings the crimson buds closer and inhales, eyes fluttering shut. “No matter. I’ve always liked them.”

“They’re beautiful,” you agree, turning your attention to the selection of roses lining the topmost shelf. “Do you have a color preferen—?”

“Or maybe these would be better,” Nayeon interrupts, plucking up a pale pink calla lily from the bouquet you keep in a table display. “Or that one—what is it?”

You follow the trajectory of her gaze to a bunch of little white flowers with golden centers, stark against the dark dirt and surrounding green foliage. “That would be bloodroot,” you answer. “One of my personal favorites—it’s both ornamental and medicinal. It would look lovely in a bouquet.”

Nayeon pulls a face and shakes her head. “No, no—I don’t want anything with such a horrible name. What about these?” she asks, reaching up to take a closer look at a larger bloom. “Peonies, right?”

By the time Nayeon makes it back to the checkout counter with a few sample rose cuttings in hand, you’re fairly certain that several eternities have passed. “Is there anything else you need?” you ask as you ring her up and wrap the flowers neatly in paper.

“A discount for an old friend?” she queries, shooting you a playful wink. When you don’t answer right away, she giggles. “I’m kidding! Obviously, I’ll pay. It’s not like I’m pressed for money—I mean, you’ve seen who my fiancé is, right? Now gosh, where did I put my wallet?”

Your cheeks are beginning to feel far too hot. Nayeon is still rummaging in her purse, and you quickly duck beneath the counter under the pretense of looking for some ribbon to tie off the bouquet. Fanning your face, you take a few deep breaths, listening as she continues chattering away.

“We’re having dinner tonight, actually, Hoseok and I. It’ll be our second real date, and… wait!” She gasps, and you peer up just in time to see her slap a hand over her perfectly lacquered mouth. “You should come! Bring someone, if you can—it’ll be like a double date!”

If you can? Bast snipes. Curse her.

You sigh inwardly and straighten back up, ribbon in hand. Shut up, Bast.

If you won’t, I will.

You’ll do no such thing.

Mustering up your best, most earnest smile, you hand over the wrapped flowers along with her change. “That sounds like fun,” you tell her, ignoring the way your insides lurch at the lie. “When and where?”

Nayeon beams and rattles off the address of an unfamiliar restaurant. “Don’t be late!” she calls as she heads for the door. The bell jangles cheerily as she departs, and as soon as the door shuts behind her, Lisa pokes her head around a nearby bookshelf.

“Finally,” she sighs, walking over to join you. “I thought she’d never leave.”

Ordinarily, you wouldn’t dare speak ill of a customer, but you’re willing to make an exception today. “You and me both,” you reply, watching as Bast slinks over like a shadow and hops onto the counter beside you. He nuzzles his face into the crook of your elbow in silent solidarity, and you mindlessly begin scratching behind his ears as Lisa speaks again.

“Are you really going to go to that dinner tonight?”

You meet her gaze, shrugging. “I already said I would. Do I really have a choice?”

There isn’t much else to say, and both you and she know it. Pushing off from where she’s leaning against the countertop, Lisa flips her coppery hair over her shoulder and shoots you a look, brown eyes full of sympathy. “Good luck,” she says sincerely. You get the feeling that she wants to say something else, but decides against it at the last minute. Instead, she bids you goodbye and walks out with a wave and another chime of the bell. Silence settles over the shop once more, and you allow yourself a few moments to breathe—slow and deep, in and out—before picking up your phone and opening up the most recent text messages. It doesn’t take long to find the name you’re looking for, but you still pause, thumbs hovering over the keyboard, before you begin to type.

[4:21pm] You: how would you like to join me for a very awkward dinner date?

[4:21pm] Jin: consider me intrigued.

///

You and Jin arrive at the restaurant first. It’s an ornate, palatial place with tuxedoed waitstaff and a coat room, and despite giving the name ‘Jung’ at the door, you’re certain that Hoseok played no part in the venue selection. The host ushers you to a booth tucked in the back, the cushioned seats a velvety burgundy and a chandelier glittering overhead, throwing refracted, iridescent light across the veined marble table. All of a sudden, the simple black dress you’re wearing feels painfully inadequate. Glancing down at your feet, you wonder if you should have worn heels instead.

Beside you, Jin cuts a striking figure in a creamy silk shirt with ribbons that tie into a bow at his throat, the material loose and flowy up until where it tucks into fitted black slacks. His pink hair complements the elegant outfit perfectly, parted and swept off his forehead to reveal his dark brows.

As if reading your mind, he lays a gentle hand on your shoulder. “You look beautiful,” he says, before gesturing at the booth. “Now, do you want the inside or outside? Think you’ll need to make a quick getaway at some point?”

“Probably,” you sigh. Jin nods and sits down first, and you watch him slide across the seat cushion before settling in beside him. “I still can’t believe you volunteered to be here,” you murmur, plucking up one of the folded cloth napkins and fiddling with the crisp white edges. “You’re a saint, I swear.”

Jin chuckles and plucks the napkin from your clasped hands, laying it across your lap instead. “Not a saint,” he says, matching your soft tone. “Just someone who cares about you.”

Your cheeks warm at his sudden proximity. “Thank you,” you tell him, for what must be the umpteenth time. “I can’t even imagine what I’d do without you.”

“Good thing you don’t have to, then,” he replies with a grin. “Now, chin up. They just walked in.”

You can’t help the groan that escapes you. “Is it too late to run?”

“Afraid so,” he answers honestly.

And then Nayeon is slipping into the cushioned seat opposite you, syrupy smile in place on her berry lacquered lips. “Hi!” she chirps, laying a hand on Hoseok’s arm as he sits down beside her. “Sorry we’re late. We, um…” She pauses and shoots Hoseok a conspiratorial look, giggling. “... lost track of the time.”

Your magic flares, hot and bright in your veins, and you know Jin feels it too when he lays a cautionary hand on your knee beneath the table. “We weren’t waiting long,” he says, offering the two a genial smile. He’s perfectly polite as he and Nayeon exchange quick introductions, and gestures toward the assortment of menus on the table as soon as everyone has settled down. “Why don’t we order some wine to start?”

“Oh, that’s a splendid idea! Isn’t that a splendid idea, Hoseok?” Nayeon turns to the auburn-haired man beside her, and you do the same, gaze landing on Hoseok for the first time tonight. He’s in an all black ensemble, sharp jacket layered over a silky black shirt, the top buttons loosened to bare a tantalizing sliver of golden skin. His auburn hair is parted, a stray lock falling across his forehead, and you shiver when you realize he’s staring right back at you with dark, unreadable eyes.

At the sound of Nayeon’s voice, Hoseok seems to snap out of his trance, his expression smoothing out as he plasters on a smile. “Take a look at the menu,” he says, picking up the leather-bound book and offering it to her. “Dinner’s on me.”

You blink. “We can’t let you do that, Hobi.”

“Let me pick up at least part of the tab,” Jin adds, already reaching for his wallet. “I’m no corporate bigshot, but I do well enough for myself.”

“No need to be modest,” you chime in, nudging him playfully. “Weren’t you just telling me about your new restaurant opening on the way over? Next week, right?”

Jin’s ears redden as all the attention is turned onto him. “Next week, yeah.”

“That’s amazing!” Nayeon chirps, pressing closer to Hoseok. “We’ll have to check it out sometime. Maybe a date night, right, darling?”

Hoseok busies himself with rearranging his cutlery, swapping the knife and fork around. “Right—sure. If we ever make it up to Seoul, we’ll, uh… we’ll definitely stop by. Congratulations, man.”

The conversation continues. A server stops by to take your wine order, and Jin decides on a moderately priced bottle of cabernet sauvignon. Glasses are brought over, and wine is poured. Hoseok finishes his quickly and pours himself another, and though his wolf metabolism prevents him from getting drunk off of regular wine, you know that he’s a bit of a lightweight and tends to avoid drinking heavily no matter what the beverage. He’s drinking with a purpose tonight, and you’re beyond grateful when Jin pipes up with yet another story when the conversation lulls.

“And then I found out that the oven was on the whole time! Adam would probably let the entire apartment go up in flames just to spite me—I should watch my back.”

“Or, you know, just watch the oven more closely,” you tease. “I’ve seen your place, Jin—it’s a complete fire hazard. It’s a wonder it hasn’t burned to the ground already.”

Jin sniffs. “You’re exaggerating. Stop making me look bad.”

“You make yourself look bad,” you retort, laughing when his lower lip juts out into a pout.

Across the table, Hoseok clears his throat. “Speaking of fire hazards—did I ever tell you about the time {Name} set me on fire?”

“I did no such thing!” you protest, reaching over to slap his arm. “I mean, okay, maybe a little bit, but that was one time! And you were barely singed!”

Hoseok snorts out a laugh. “Barely singed? I couldn’t sit properly for a week.”

“Oh please, that’s a lie and you know it!”

Nayeon interrupts your conversation with a loud huff, setting her wineglass down with enough force to thud against the veined marble tabletop. “Do one of you maybe want to fill us in on the joke here?”

Abashed, you glance back at Hoseok, watching as his smile slowly fades back into the careful, neutral expression he’s worn all evening. “Sorry,” you murmur. “It’s an old story from when we were kids—when we first met, actually. We were seven years old, and it was the second day of school. I didn’t have a very good handle on my magic yet, and accidentally set Hoseok’s tail on fire during recess.”

“I preferred to run around in my wolf form back then,” Hoseok further elaborates. “There was a big field out behind the school—remember that, {Name}?”

You nod. “Of course. It went right up to the very edge of the woods. And if you kept going and went far enough, you reached the old wooden bridge.”

Hoseok is smiling again, soft and fond. “That thing was a death trap.”

“But the teachers could never keep us away,” you say, grinning at him.

“All right,” Nayeon interrupts again, sniffing disdainfully. “Enough about the old days—I think it’s time to talk about the present. And more importantly, the future.” She sighs happily and props her chin up in her palm, ensuring that the delicate golden band on her ring finger is on full display, the metal glimmering in the warm light. “You’re both invited to the wedding, of course. And I never did properly thank you for the flowers today, {Name}!”

Her words seem to come as a surprise to Hoseok, who straightens up in his seat. “Flowers? You visited Hellebore today?”

“Of course I did!” Nayeon hides a giggle behind a manicured hand. “I wouldn’t even think of trusting anyone else with my bouquet.”

Hoseok’s gaze skitters over to you, awash with concern and tinged with apology, but you ignore him in favor of forcing your expression into something that’s meant to be a smile. Yet no matter how much you strain your cheeks and stretch your lips, it feels—and looks, you’re sure—far more like a grimace.

“I’m happy to do it,” you lie, your teeth gritted and tight. “I don’t mind it one bit.”

///

“So. That was just as awkward as promised.”

You and Jin are walking back to Hellebore, leaving behind the bustling downtown area for the darker, quieter streets of your neighborhood. Your companion’s hair is tinged orange in the glow from the streetlamps, and you can only chuckle humorlessly when he turns to you and raises his eyebrows.

“Can’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“I was duly warned,” Jin agrees.

A car drives by, the headlights throwing Jin’s profile into stark relief. His expression is solemn but he doesn’t say anything else and neither do you. The remainder of the walk passes in silence, broken only by the occasional strain of conversation from passersby and the low drone of late night traffic. You reach Hellebore with no incidents, and you muffle a yawn as Jin steps into the wardrobe to go back to Seoul.

Just before he shuts the door behind him, he shoots you a meaningful glance over his shoulder. “You should tell him how you feel, you know. He deserves to know. And you… you deserve to be happy.”

He doesn’t elaborate, and you don’t need him to. Long after he’s gone, his remark echoes in your head, and no matter what, you simply cannot seem to shake it.

///

It’s been years since you’ve last gone to the old bridge, but after last night’s conversation you find yourself pulled back, lured by the promise of memories of a kinder time. The forest beyond the field hasn’t changed much since your school days, and neither, you realize, has the bridge itself. It still stands tall, proudly spanning the steep ravine that your teachers warned you about, the rickety wood splitting apart at the seams and overgrown with lichen and climbing ivy. Far below, the white-capped river rushes by on its long, turbulent journey to the sea.

Carefully, you step onto the bridge—first one foot, then the other. The energy in the air shifts as soon as your feet leave the loamy earth, finding traction instead on hewn wood, and you sigh as your fingertips brush against the railing. The magic here is an old magic—different from the ancient magic that dwells in places like the werewolves’ clearing and the realms of the fae. The low thrum of it fills the air and seeps into your veins, quickening your pulse and prickling your skin.

“I thought you might be here.” The voice comes from your left, barely audible over the rush of the river.

“You thought right,” you reply, stepping forward until you’re toeing the railing and leaning over to stare down into the swirling, eddying waters below.

Hoseok joins you at the edge. His profile is stark against the leafy green backdrop, and for a few moments, all is still. Then: “I’m really sorry about last night.”

The apology hangs in the silence for a few moments before fading into the sound of churning water and wind whistling through the trees. You suck in a deep breath, oxygen swelling your lungs until you can hold it in no longer, before letting it escape in a resigned sigh.

“You don’t have to apologize to me, Hoseok.”

“Maybe not. But I want to.” He shoots you a sidelong glance. “Will you let me make it up to you?”

You raise a brow. “Make it up to me? And how exactly do you plan on doing that?”

“Anything you want.” Hoseok smiles crookedly, but you can’t quell the tumult brewing in your belly.

“What do you want, Hobi?”

His smile fades. “I—” He stops and shakes his head, auburn hair flying. “It doesn’t matter what I want. This is about you.”

You gaze up at him, taking in the sharp cut of his jawline and the straight angle of his nose. Your eyes trail along the smooth slope of his rounded cheeks and the soft curve of his mouth, lingering on the little mole atop his upper lip.

And then you reach out and take his hand, savoring the way his fingers immediately, comfortably settle into the spaces between your own. “Why don’t we head down to the river?” you ask. “It’s been a long time since we’ve been, and I’ve missed it.”

Hoseok’s expression softens, a glimmer of something bright shining in his amber-flecked irises. Gently, he tugs on your hand, taking the lead as you leave the bridge behind and head north in search of the sloping path that will take you down and into the ravine that houses the riverbed. You chance a few glances over the treacherous edge, watching the water froth and tumble over the rocks.

“You know, this seems a lot more dangerous now than it did back then,” you muse. “I see why our teachers were always trying to keep us away.”

“We were kids back then,” Hoseok says, grinning. “We thought we were invincible. Nothing could touch us.”

“Simpler times,” you agree with a laugh. “I set your tail on fire, you cried—”

“—and then we became lifelong friends,” Hoseok finishes, joining in your mirth. “Easy-peasy.”

Together, you locate the path down to the ravine. The descent is easier than it was back then, your longer limbs extending your reach, but you’re grateful for Hoseok’s steadying hand all the same. He carefully guides you around the biggest rocks and tree roots, pulling you closer when you lose your footing near the bottom. His fingers remain twined with yours even after you’ve safely arrived at the riverbed, stepping across stones that have been worn smooth and warmed by the sun. You slip off your shoes, letting them dangle from your free hand, and Hoseok does the same.

Sunlight glitters off the water, throwing a thousand refractive diamonds across the surface, but when you dip your toes in you find that it’s cold as a mountain spring in autumn. That doesn’t stop Hoseok from bending down to splash you though, and you shriek in surprise before retaliating with a silent spell that sends icy water splattering across the faded denim of his jeans.

“That’s not fair!” he protests. “You can’t use magic!”

“I’m just using every resource available to me,” you reply with a sly grin, sending a swelling wave of water toward him with a lazy twist of your hand.

From beneath his drenched hair, Hoseok raises a challenging brow in your direction. “Oh yeah?”

Before you can even blink, he’s shrugging off his jacket and pulling his shirt over his head, baring a taut, honeyed abdomen and toned arms. Tossing the discarded clothes onto the bank, he unfastens his belt and lets that drop as well, fixing you with a crooked little smirk all the while. The muscles in his torso ripple.

And then he’s shifting—limbs elongating and reddish-brown fur sprouting from his skin. His remaining clothing rips under the strain of the transformation, floating downstream in tattered shreds, but you don’t pay them any mind. No matter how many times you’ve watched Hoseok shift, you’ll never quite get used to it. He hunches over, more beast than man at this point, his chest rumbling. And before you know it—before you can even pinpoint exactly when the transformation is complete—he’s standing before you as a massive russet wolf, baring ferociously sharp teeth that you know could easily tear a man limb from limb.

His eyes, however, remain the same—warm, molten brown flecked with amber and gold, a devilish twinkle lurking in their depths. You cock your head to the side in a silent challenge, and swear that the wolf in front of you grins before pouncing forward, landing in the river with an enormous splash that leaves you thoroughly drenched.

“Now we’re both soaked!” you cry in between giggles, watching as Hoseok emerges from the water, his fur dampened black and dripping. “How is this a win for you?”

Hoseok rears back and lets loose a triumphant howl, shaking himself out and further drenching you with the spray of water from his coat. You squeal and back up several steps, batting him away, but Hoseok just presses closer and nuzzles his wet face into the crook of your neck. His body heaves with every breath, flaring hot against your skin, and for a few long moments, you simply stand there, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck as icy water rushes past your ankles.

After what feels like an eternity, you step back, releasing Hoseok and staring up into his face. Even in his wolf form, he towers over you, and you reach up to stroke his muzzle tenderly before bopping him on the nose. “Come on,” you murmur. “Let’s dry off.”

Hoseok lets out a low rumble of agreement, and together, you make your way back to shore. You fold up his discarded clothing while he trots off to locate his shredded jeans, quickly finding them caught between some rocks and carrying the denim tatters back over to you in his teeth. Shaking your head, you add it to the growing pile and lay a hand atop it. Heat concentrates in your fingertips, mingling with the magic running through your veins. Stitch by stitch, his jeans repair themselves, drying in the process. Hoseok bumps your cheek with his nose in gratitude and darts off to change, and you dry your own clothes while you wait.

When Hoseok returns, he’s reverted to his human form, fully dressed and raking a hand through his damp hair. “Thanks for drying these off,” he says, flashing you a sheepish grin. “And for fixing my pants. Again.”

“Mending charms are easy,” you reply, and it’s the truth. Over the many years you’ve known Hoseok, you’ve mended his clothing countless times—from the accidental transformations in his early years, before he could control it, to the calculated ones as he got older. Hoseok doesn’t shift terribly often nowadays, but on occasion he still goes out to stretch his muscles and hunt with his pack. His grandfather, in particular, always made the time to take him hunting at least once a month. You wonder if he’s gone since he passed, but decide not to ask.

“Should we go see the Towers?” you ask instead.

“Lead the way,” he agrees, falling into step beside you as you head downstream. The ravine walls are higher here, decorated with gnarled roots and rocky outcrops that obscure the periwinkle sky and cast long shadows across the ground. Cairns begin to crop up on both sides of the river—each tower of stones carefully and deliberately stacked. They’re small and scattered at first, but gradually become taller and more frequent until you’re nearly surrounded by a forest of stone. The air grows noticeably heavier—the magic more potent. It almost feels as if electricity is dancing across your skin, the sparks sinking into your pores and melding with your soul.

Hoseok feels it too, if the look of awe in his eyes is any indication. “I can’t believe I’d nearly forgotten about this place,” he marvels, running a finger across one of the stacked stones. “Do you feel that? The magic?” Then he chuckles. “Wait, of course you do. What am I talking about?”

You smile softly, tracing the path his fingertips leave behind. “Yeah, Hobi. I feel it.”

The topmost stones are almost out of your reach now. Reaching into your pocket, you pull out a gray pebble about the size of your palm—a near perfect disc veined with white. Gently, you place it atop the cairn closest to you, watching it glint in the sunlight for a moment before turning to your companion.

“Well?”

Ancient legend dictates that as long as an offering is left, one may take a stone from the Towers. You and Hoseok have each acquired a rather sizable collection during your childhood years, lured by the promise that the stones will bring about good fortune and happiness.

“I forgot to bring something,” Hoseok admits, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “But I can pick one out for you. Hang on…” He hums thoughtfully as he scans the towering pillars, tapping his chin until he alights on one in particular, plucking up a stone that’s been worn smooth, burnished orange and marbled with ivory and copper. “What do you think?”

“It’s beautiful,” you reply, admiring the way the marbled surface glitters in the sun.

Hoseok takes your hand and places the stone gently in your palm. “It’s yours.”

Then he’s off—stepping over a fallen log to admire another tower, brushing a curious finger across a moss-covered rock before glancing over his shoulder at you. “Coming?”

You nod, tucking his gift away safely in your pocket. Together, you carve out a path amongst the towering cairns, clambering over river rocks and brushing aside the dense undergrowth. The path opens up again gradually, revealing the burbling water to your left and the steep ravine wall to your right. The river is calmer here—clear enough to see all the way to the bottom where shimmering, silvery fish dart about. A low, flat rock juts out into the water a short ways away, and Hoseok strides over to plop atop it, gesturing for you to join him.

“This is nice,” he sighs once you’ve made yourself comfortable by his side. “The fresh air is doing me a world of good. I’ve been cooped up at the office for so long, I swear I almost forgot what trees smell like.”

“You’re more than welcome to sniff around the shop if you ever need a reminder,” you tell him, nudging his shoulder playfully. “Better yet, I’ll bring you a plant for your office. Spruce up the place a little bit.”

“That sounds great, actually,” he admits with a chuckle. “I don’t have your green thumb, though. I’ll probably end up accidentally killing it.”

“Something low maintenance, then,” you promise. “A succulent, maybe. When should I bring it by?”

Hoseok’s expression sombers. “You can always stop by tomorrow after the hearing.”

Your heart plummets into your stomach. The Ministry—the overarching government body that dictates all Shadowfolk affairs—summons every pack alpha for a confirmation hearing when they first come into power. “They’re holding the hearing? Already?”

He nods. “The Ministry’s summoned me for tomorrow morning. First item on their schedule, I’m pretty sure.” A resigned sigh escapes his lips, dissipating into mist on the air. “And there’s a party at JungTech HQ afterward. You know. So my dad can officially hand the reins over.”

“The most powerful man in Gwangju,” you murmur, thinking back to Lisa’s words.

Hoseok lets out a derisive snort. “Yeah, right. The most powerful man, beholden to his dad, the Council, and the entire fucking Ministry. It doesn’t matter what I want to do. Never has.”

It’s the second time he’s dismissed his feelings, and as much as you want to ask what it is he truly wants, you find that the words are stuck in your throat, your mouth suddenly as dry as the desert on a cloudless day. Instead, you lay a silent hand over his, feeling his warmth seep up into your palm.

“Hey.” Hoseok doesn’t tear his gaze away from the sky, watching a flock of birds fly overhead. “Yesterday, when Nayeon said she’d stopped by… did she say anything to you?”

The sound of her name leaving his lips leaves a sour taste on your tongue, but you swallow it down. “Not really,” you tell him. “She looked at some flowers and invited me to dinner. Simple as that.”

Hoseok nods slowly, lips pursed. “Was Jin already there when she came?”

You blink. “Jin? Oh, no—no, he wasn’t. I texted him after Nayeon left.”

“Ah.”

“I’m glad he was free, though.” You stare down into the water, where a curious fish swims in and out of the shadow you cast. “I’m honestly not sure who I could’ve invited if he hadn’t been available. Plus, it’s been ages since I’ve had dinner with him, and it’s been a few months since you’ve seen him too, right? I’m really happy it worked out.” You’re rambling now, but you can’t stop yourself. Hoseok has become eerily still, lost in introspection, and you feel obligated to fill the silence.

“You two make sense, you know.” Hoseok’s voice comes suddenly. “As a couple. Both witches—it makes a lot of sense.”

You peer over at him, eyes widening at his assumption. “We—we’re not actually together, Jin and I. We’re just friends.”

Hoseok straightens at that, his gaze flitting down to meet yours. “Really?”

“Really.”

A beat of silence. Hoseok looks like he wants to say something else, but a quiet buzz from his pocket stops him in his tracks. His mouth clamps shut as he checks his phone, teeth clicking together, and you can tell from the sudden tension in his jaw that it isn’t good news.

“Do you have to head back?”

He nods stiffly, silent apology written all over his face. “Work calls.”

You offer him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about me. Go on. I’ll see you tomorrow after your hearing.”

He nods again and turns to leave. Before he can take too many steps, though, you call him back, reaching into your pocket to pull out the stone he’d gifted you earlier.

“Take this,” you murmur, pressing it into his hands. “I’m pretty sure you need it more than I do right now.”

Hoseok’s fingers curl protectively around the stone, holding on like it’s his only remaining lifeline. “Thanks.”

///

Downtown Gwangju is a monochrome forest of towering glass and steel, clamorous and unchecked by nature, proudly defiant in the face of the earth mother herself. The sidewalks are awash with people rushing back from their lunch break, forcing you to dodge around several businessmen too absorbed in their phones. Just as you are finding your footing again, a hapless intern carrying a tray of coffee cups rushes past, nearly crashing into you.

“Oh, shi—sorry! Sorry, oh, jeez. Are you okay?”

You wave off his apology with a smile, taking in the ill fit of his suit and the messy knot of his tie. “Don’t worry about it,” you tell him, reaching out to help him steady the tray in his hands. A stabilizing spell—silently cast, the magic pulsing through your fingertips—should be enough to get him back to his office with no additional mishaps. You wonder if he’ll notice that his tray is suddenly more well-balanced, or that his hands have steadied.

But then again, you suppose it doesn’t really matter whether he does or not.

Somehow, someway, you make it to JungTech without running into anyone else. The receptionist recognizes you immediately and points you toward the elevator with a smile, and you thank her as you press the up button. It doesn’t take long to arrive, and you take a deep breath as you step inside, staring at your reflection in the mirrored walls.

All right? Bast queries, stirring awake in your mind.

You release the breath that you’d been holding in a long whoosh. Yeah. I’m all right.

The doors open on the top floor, and straight away, you are assailed by a cacophony of sounds. Scattered conversations and laughter intermingle with the clinking of champagne flutes. There are at least fifty people scattered around the open space that lies between the elevator and the glass-fronted CEO’s office at the very back—the office that bears Hoseok’s name on the door. There’s no sign of the man himself, but you have no doubt that he’s nearby. This entire party is a celebration for him, after all.

The elevator doors begin to close, and you quickly reach out to stop them, stepping out before it can protest at your dawdling. A young man in a pristine white shirt materializes on your right with a tray full of champagne flutes, and you pluck one off with a murmur of thanks. Sipping slowly, you wander around the perimeters of the party, listening to the lively chatter. Across the room, you spot Lisa, returning her friendly wave with one of your own.

“Hello, {Name}.”

The deep, familiar voice has you whirling around in an instant, head bowing in automatic deference. “Mr. Jung,” you murmur, not quite daring to look him in the eye. “It’s been a while.”

Hoseok’s father inclines his head in acknowledgment, salt-and-pepper hair gleaming beneath the fluorescent lights. No doubt he was a handsome man in his younger days, but the salt in his hair has steadily overtaken the pepper in the last few years, the stern lines around his mouth deepening.

“I didn’t know you would be joining us today,” he says cordially. “But then again, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised after all these years. Have you been here long?”

“Not long. Five minutes, maybe.” Beneath his piercing gaze, you feel like a small child again. Quickly, you scramble for something else to say, gesturing around the sleek glass interior of the office. “This is a lovely party. You must be so proud.”

Another nod. “I wasn’t sure that Hoseok was going to step up,” he admits. “I had my reservations about whether or not he would accept his duties as a Jung, but he has, and I’m pleased that he did. It’s no easy feat, running this company and leading the city’s pack. But I’ve served my time, just as my father did before me.” His gaze flits down to meet yours suddenly, and you find that you can’t read the emotion swimming in them. “I believe I spotted you at his funeral the other day, did I not?”

You nod, resisting the urge to take a sip from your nearly empty champagne glass as your cheeks warm under the scrutiny. “I was, yes. I’m very grateful to have had the opportunity to pay my respects. He was a great man.”

“That, he was,” Mr. Jung agrees. “Hoseok takes after him in many ways. My father—as great as he was—always had a soft spot for the boy. Coddled him a bit too much.”

“With all due respect, Mr. Jung, I think that’s a grandfather’s job,” you reply with a smile.

That earns you a smile in return, the lines around his mouth easing. After exchanging a few more pleasantries, Hoseok’s father excuses himself to talk to the other guests, and you set off in search of Hoseok himself. You can feel his aura somewhere nearby, strong and steady, but the room is large enough that you cannot pinpoint his exact location. Not for the first time, you curse the fact that you don’t have a werewolf’s sharp sense of smell. No doubt it could easily be as cumbersome as it is helpful, but it would certainly help you right now.

Turning a corner, you are about to continue lamenting your average olfactory system when you suddenly catch a glimpse of familiar auburn hair, afloat in a sea of black suits. Dodging around a sharply dressed businesswoman and ducking beneath a waiter’s serving tray clears your path to Hoseok, and you’re milliseconds away from stepping forward to greet him when you feel it.

There’s an energy emanating from Hoseok, the likes of which you’ve never felt from him before. It’s heavy and commanding and so potent that the air is laden with it, and a cursory glance at the people surrounding him reveals that they feel it too—their gazes lowered, voices hushed and respectful. In his fitted black suit and emerald green shirt, he looks every bit the alpha he is, and you are quickly realizing that you’re not immune to the power radiating off of him. The Hoseok standing before you isn’t the same Hoseok whose tail you set on fire all those years ago. Far from it. The revelation is somehow simultaneously terrifying and thrilling, and your heart leaps into your throat when you notice that he’s waving you over.

As if compelled, you comply, striding forward until you’re standing before him. “Hi,” your murmur, suddenly feeling shy.

Hoseok’s face splits into a smile. “Hi yourself,” he says, and you would have laughed if your insides didn’t feel like they were about to burst.

“I, um. I brought you your succulent,” you tell him, reaching into your bag. There’s a tiny potted jade plant inside, packaged neatly into a box that you open up and present to him. “It’s jade. Easy to keep alive, and easy to propagate too, if you’re inclined.”

Hoseok accepts your gift, his smile growing as he admires the plump green leaves. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

You shrug and wave off his gratitude, fiddling to clasp your bag shut. “So,” you start, glancing around and gnawing on your bottom lip, completely missing the way Hoseok’s eyes darken as he follows the movement. “It looks like everything went well at the Ministry. Your dad is pleased.”

Hoseok hums, low in his throat. “You talked to him?”

“Yeah, just now.”

“I see.”

He looks like he wants to say something more, but he’s interrupted by a blur of motion and a shrill cry of his name. A moment later, Nayeon is at his side, latching onto his arm and batting her lashes, adorned in a form-fitting red dress and golden jewelry.

“Hoseok! There you are. I’ve been looking all over for you!” Then her gaze alights on you, eyes going wide as if she’s only just noticed your presence. “{Name}, oh my goodness. I almost didn’t see you there, hi!”

“Hello, Nayeon,” you grit out, unable to hide your scowl. You wonder if she spotted it before you hid it behind a large sip of champagne.

Luckily, she doesn’t seem to notice. Her attention refocuses onto a spot behind you, and you watch as her expression lights up, delight etching across her features. “Mr. Jung!” she exclaims. “There’s my favorite future father-in-law. Come and join us—it’s not a party without you.”

Hoseok’s father chuckles lightly, coming forward to stand beside you. “Long time no see,” he jokes, nodding in your direction. “And Nayeon—hello. How are you enjoying the party?”

“Oh, I’m having the loveliest time,” she chirps, simpering up at Hoseok. “How could I not be, when my fiancé is here with me?” Then she smiles—her lips painted the same shade of red as her dress. “But I’m sure I’m nowhere near as happy as you are. You must be beyond excited to spend some quality time with your wife after being busy for so long.”

“I am,” Mr. Jung admits. The severity in his features softens as he seeks out his wife, standing across the room surrounded by friends and extended family. “I’m a very lucky man to have a woman like her.”

Nayeon giggles. “And I’m a lucky woman to have a man like your son. Isn’t that right, darling?”

She tilts her head to look up at Hoseok, who blinks twice in rapid succession, his throat bobbing. “Right,” he says, his voice raspy. “The luckiest.”

And as you turn to engage Mr. Jung in conversation once more, you miss the way his gaze lingers on you.

///

Tuesdays at Hellebore are for brewing. You save bottling for Thursdays—giving your potions and other concoctions ample time to simmer and set—but today, you are hunched over the stove with all four burners turned to different temperature settings, watching over your pots so that they don’t boil over.

A cursory glance out the window tells you that it’s well into the afternoon, the pastel blue sky littered with trailing clouds lit hazy and golden in the sun. You’ve been in the kitchen since early morning, and, desperate for a breath of fresh air, you crack the window open and inhale deeply. Then you turn back to the stove, giving one pot a stir and adding a pinch of burdock root to another.

Wandering downstairs, you head to the greenhouse. The sunlight is brighter here, the air more humid. Inhaling deeply, you breathe in the scent of the hundreds of plants growing inside, before heading for the laburnum tree in the far corner. Carefully, you brush aside the cascading golden flowers, about to gather the dried ones that have fallen to the dirt when there’s a knock on the front door.

“I’m sorry, we’re close—” you say, stopping when you recognize the head of coppery red hair in the window. “Lisa?” Confused, you open the door and let her inside. “What brings you here today?”

“You need to go to Hoseok, now,” she says, foregoing any preambles. “He’s… well, you’ll see. Nayeon’s there right now, but she’s not helping the situation, and...” She sighs. “I’m pretty sure you’re the only one who can help him now.”

All at once, your stomach drops to your toes. “What’s wrong with Hoseok?” you demand. “Is he hurt?”

Lisa shakes her head, red hair flying. “No, he’s fine. I don’t know how much longer that’ll last, though.”

The cryptic response sends your heart into overdrive, pounding against your ribcage like a doomsday drum. Striding over to the bay window, you wake Bast from his nap in a slanted ray of sunlight, scratching behind his black ears and watching as his golden eyes flicker open, pupils going wide when he senses your turmoil.

What is it?

Hoseok, you reply shortly. Beneath your touch, Bast’s ears perk up.

What do you need?

You swallow, hard, and suck in a deep breath. I’m going to open a portal.

It’s a dangerous feat, and both you and Bast know it. Opening a portal requires an immense amount of energy, and maintaining one long enough to travel through is a risk to even the most experienced witches. You’ve heard horror stories of spliced limbs and paralysis, and in some cases, even death.

But for Hoseok, you’re willing to risk it all.

“Lisa,” you say, grabbing your purse and striding back to the front door of the shop. “Can you lock up once I’m gone?”

She nods nervously. “Of course.”

You incline your head in silent thanks. At your feet, Bast is slinking continuous figure-eights around your ankles, betraying his worry at the task ahead. Your own heart feels ready to spring out from your ribcage and onto the sun-drenched floor, but you swallow down your nerves and look down at your familiar once more. Ready? you ask.

Ready, Bast confirms. Be careful.

I will.

Closing your eyes, you begin to visualize Hoseok’s front door, focusing on every little detail you can remember. There’s the scuff in the black paint from when he first moved in and accidentally scraped a table leg against it. There’s the bronze knocker that always hangs slightly askew. The image builds slowly in your mind, coming together like the broken pieces of a puzzle.

The air around you is suddenly much warmer than before, an invisible force sapping away at your strength and weakening your legs. Bast’s energy melds with yours, but it’s barely enough to keep you on your feet. Exhaustion seeps into your bones and steals the oxygen from your lungs. You gasp, chest heaving.

I don’t think it’s going to work. Bast’s voice is a faint whisper in the back of your mind.

It will, you hiss. It has to.

The front door of your shop is beginning to glow white, becoming hazy and amorphous as the edges begin to blur. You spot a splash of black paint coming through the fog, followed by a bronze knocker. A matching handle appears a moment later, growing out of tendrils of mist and solidifying before your eyes.

Sucking in a deep breath, you reach forward to grab it. Slowly, you turn until you can turn no longer.

And then you step through.

The first thing you hear is a low, cavernous rumble—deep enough that you feel it reverberating through your very bones. Then your surroundings begin to come into focus. You’re in Hoseok’s entryway, all your limbs thankfully intact. The relief you feel at your success is quickly eclipsed by worry though, when you see Hoseok himself on the far side of the living room. The look in his brown eyes is nothing short of wild, his white shirt unbuttoned to nearly his navel and his auburn hair sweaty and disheveled.

“H-Hobi?” Your voice is no more than a breath, dissipating in the open air.

“Hoseok.” The new voice has you whirling. Nayeon is pressed against the wall opposite him, her expression harried. “Hoseok, please—“

“Get out,” Hoseok growls, his voice dangerously low. He’s bristling with the same energy as before, the same energy you felt back at JungTech—but this time it’s enough to fill the room and spill out the opened door and into the hallway. You can feel it pulsing against your skin, hot and electric, and know that Nayeon is even more affected from the way her shoulders slouch, her eyes dropping to the floor when he snarls. “Get out, now.”

She does. Nayeon turns on her heel and dashes out, slamming the door behind her and leaving you alone with Hoseok. His eyes are alight with something more wolf than man, his chest heaving with uneven breaths, and it’s all you can do not to shrink back when he turns his full attention onto you. Even from across the room, you can smell the liquor spilled across the coffee table in a dark ooze of fluid, cloying and bitter.

“What are you doing here?” Hoseok asks, his voice cracking on the last syllable. “You shouldn’t be here right now, {Name}.”

“Lisa told me to come,” you whisper. “You’ve been pushing yourself too much, Hoseok.”

Hoseok shakes his head and rakes a frazzled hand through his hair. “You need to leave,” he grunts. Shakily, he reaches out to right the overturned liquor bottle, the pad of his thumb skimming across the shattered edge.

“Let me do that,” you tell him, making to step forward, but Hoseok stops you with a raised hand and a low growl that stops you in your tracks.

“Don’t,” he hisses. “Don’t you dare come any closer to me.”

You shake your head. “Hobi, it’s obvious you’ve been drinking. Let me help you.”

“No!” he snarls, flinching back when you take a step forward. “You need to leave. It’s… it’s dangerous for you here.”

“Dangerous?” Your voice is reduced to a whisper at the severity of his reaction, the energy in the air intensifying until it’s almost unbearable. “Why?”

“Because I’m in heat!” Hoseok spits. He sucks in a deep breath, the air whistling between his teeth, before he lets out an agonized moan and pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m in heat,” he repeats, reticence dripping from every syllable. “I can’t even fucking think straight, and I’m afraid I’m going to hurt you if you stay. So please, {Name}. Please go.”

“But Nayeon…” you begin, wavering when his eyes flash darkly at the mention of her name. “Or Lisa… I can call her, maybe—”

“No!”

You jump, startled at the volume of his shout.

“No,” Hoseok repeats, softer this time. “Don’t. I don’t want them. I’m—I’m fine.”

The sticky humidity and the pulsating energy flowing through the room tell you otherwise. “You’re clearly not,” you tell him gently, taking another step toward him. “Let me call Lisa. Or maybe one of the other girls in the pack, I’m sure someone can help y—”

“I don’t want Lisa.” Defeat suffuses his tone, his eyes fluttering shut. “I don’t want any of them. I want—fuck.” Hoseok groans and lets his head fall back against the wall, the dull thunk echoing in the stillness. “It doesn’t fucking matter what I want. You need to leave, {Name}. You’re only going to be in danger if you stay.”

For the second time that afternoon, only one word springs to mind. “Why?”

Hoseok groans again. “Because I’m weak,” he mutters hoarsely. “Because I’m weak, and I’m not thinking straight, and if you come any closer to me, I won’t be able to stop myself from pinning you against that wall right there and having my way with you.”

Your breath hitches in your throat. The rippling energy in the air is almost oppressive in its strength, and only grows when Hoseok’s gaze finally lands on you, his pupils blown out and blacker than the night.

“Go,” he entreaties, dragging a frazzled hand through his hair. “Please, {Name}.”

You suck in a deep breath, your lungs swelling and expanding with the newfound oxygen. Then, ever so slowly, you let your gaze flicker up to meet his. “What if I don’t want to?”

Hoseok freezes. Time comes to a standstill, and even the overwhelming energy emanating from him seems to falter. The room is near silent, broken only by your companion’s ragged breathing, his chest heaving beneath the thin white fabric of his shirt. Even from across the room, you can see the sheen of sweat coating his honeyed skin, shining in the light of the setting sun.

“You don’t mean that,” he says at last. “You can’t mean that.”

“I can,” you whisper. “And I do.”

For three agonizingly long seconds, Hoseok remains rooted firmly in place, his throat bobbing harshly. Then, before you can even blink, he’s striding forward—a blur of motion almost too quick for your eyes to follow. He comes to a stop a hair’s breadth from you, one hand reaching up to cup your face delicately, as if you’re made of glass.

“You,” he rasps, “have no idea what you’ve just done.” His thumb traces the swell of your cheek just below your eye, the motion surprisingly tender. Your heart stutters in your chest.

And then he leans down and crushes his mouth to yours.

The rest of the world falls away, dissolving into nothing. Your eyes flutter shut as Hoseok’s hands slide down your sides to curl around your hips, your body melting against his taut frame. He is all you can feel and all you can taste, and you keen helplessly when he grinds against you, his cock hot and hard against your stomach.

The sound seems to awaken something in Hoseok, a cavernous groan erupting from his throat. Pulling away from your mouth, he descends upon the delicate skin of your neck, teeth and tongue blossoming bruises in their wake. Shaky hands find the collar of your shirt, questioning eyes seeking out yours for permission that you happily give. He tugs the garment off almost delicately, his ravenous gaze roving across each bit of newly revealed flesh, and once it’s freed from your head he tosses it aside and sets about doing the same to the rest of your clothing.

Maybe it should feel odd, watching through lidded eyes as Hoseok drops to his knees to pull your jeans down and off your ankles. Maybe you should feel embarrassed, seeing your best friend bury his nose between your legs, delirious bliss etching across his features as he inhales, his strong fingers curling around your thighs to spread you wider. But instead, it feels completely and utterly natural—as if this was always meant to be.

“You smell divine,” Hoseok breathes, slotting himself between your spread thighs and running a fingertip along your lace-covered slit, collecting the considerable slick there and bringing it to his nose. “Fuck, {Name}. Just one whiff, and I can tell that you’re primed and ready for me.”

“Take me, then,” you breathe back shakily, rolling your hips when he slips past the lacy barrier of your panties to find your clit, circling around the sensitive nub until you’re gasping his name.

Hoseok’s gaze darkens to obsidian, his pupils swallowing up the amber-flecked brown of his irises. In one smooth motion, he’s on his feet again, straightening up to his full height as his hands find purchase on your hips. He twirls you around until you’re facing the wall, your palms pressed flat against the woven tapestry hanging there.

“Gorgeous.” A single word, laced with unmistakable awe. Then he’s fumbling with his belt buckle, the metallic clink and tug of a zipper reaching your ears, before he presses against you, clothed chest molding against your bare back. Even through the thin layer of fabric, you can feel the sweltering heat emanating from him, his sweat soaking through the cotton and sticking to your skin. His mouth finds its way to the junction of your neck and shoulder again—teasing at the flesh until you’re quivering—before he begins laying a trail of hot kisses down your spine.

“Wanna fuck you,” Hoseok rasps, tearing your panties away once his lips reach the waistband, the flimsy lace ripped to shreds in his desperate grip. “Want you on your front, want you on your back, want you on my tongue—” His voice drops, rumbling through his chest and sending shivers through your entire body. “Want you. Wanted you for so long.”

And as if to reinforce his words, the velvety head of his cock nestles against the cleft of your backside, hot and slick.

Wordlessly, you arch your back, presenting him with the tempting swell of your rear. A glance over your shoulder reveals the strained clench of his jaw and the bob of his throat, his biceps tensed and his gaze unwavering. His control is undoubtedly dangling by a single thread at this point—a delicate, gossamer thread that’s on the verge of snapping. The delirium of his heat is overtaking his senses, his grip tightening on your hips, and ever so slowly, he begins to press forward until the tip of his thick cock is just beginning to part your walls. Already, the fit borders on excruciating, and your body tenses at the intrusion, stretched to the limit around his thick girth.

Hoseok exhales shakily, his primal instincts warring with his desire to ensure your comfort. Soft lips drop kiss after kiss onto your bare shoulders, your back, your neck—wherever he can reach as he whispers tender praises into your skin. “Breathe, princess,” he encourages lowly. “You can take it—I know you can. You were made for me.”

Obediently, you inhale, focusing on the way your lungs expand and contract as you draw air into them. The pain ebbs away with each breath you take, until all that is left is a low throb of pleasure. Your hips rock back against him, and Hoseok takes it as a sign to push forward once more, parting your walls until he’s fully seated inside you, your body stretched to the limit as you mold around him.

There’s no pain now—only an aching desire for more, more, more. He’s deep enough to reach parts of you that you’ve never been able to explore before—either alone or with other partners—and you moan brokenly when he rolls his hips experimentally. “More, Hoseok,” you whimper. “Please.”

He obliges. One thrust leads into another, the punishing pace he sets fueled by his heady desperation for relief. The full, heavy weight of his cock dragging along your walls ignites every nerve ending in your body, sizzling electricity blazing through your veins. It’s all you can do to plant your palms flat against the tapestried wall, fingers twitching at the woven fabric as Hoseok grabs your hips with enough force to bruise and pulls you back against him in time with his thrusts.

“Look at you,” he says hoarsely. “Love the way you feel, clenching around me like that. My perfect, pretty girl, taking my cock so well. I always knew you were made for me.” He grunts, forehead falling against your back, damp hair matting against your skin as he continues rutting against you. “Always—fuck—knew you were my mate.”

The particularly harsh thrust that follows his raspy declaration sends all coherent thought flying out of your head, taking your surprise along with it. All you can manage is a shuddery whine that vaguely resembles his name, the sound intermingling with the obscene smack of flesh against flesh and the continuous stream of praises Hoseok whispers into your skin.

There’s something building inside you—a dull, throbbing pressure at the point where your body joins with his. He’s still rolling up into you, but each subsequent thrust grows more and more shallow. The realization dawns on your dazed mind all at once, as you feel the growing swell at the base of his cock. Hoseok is rendered near immobile as he finally reaches his high, the entirety of his length sheathed firmly inside your pussy as he spills ropes of white against your fluttering walls. The swelling continues, filling you until you feel fit to burst.

“H-Hoseok,” you gasp. “I can’t. I can’t—you’re going to rip me in half.”

Soothing hands smooth along your sides, warm lips littering kisses onto your bare shoulders. “You can,” he murmurs tenderly. “You were made for me, and I for you. You can take it, princess. I know you can.”

The gentle repetition of his fingertips trailing nonsensical patterns into your skin eases your labored panting somewhat. Beneath his touch, you slowly relax, the pressure in your abdomen abating as his knot begins to subside.

“You did so well.” His voice is no more than a mumble, almost lost in the sweat and slick coating your skin.

You sag against the wall, taking a few moments to catch your breath before slowly easing off of him, the sudden loss leaving your core empty and aching. Gingerly, you turn around to face him, acutely aware of the way your combined juices immediately begin dribbling down your thighs.

“You said I was your mate,” you whisper, almost afraid that the sentiment will disappear if voiced aloud. “Did… did you mean that?”

“Every word,” Hoseok replies, equally soft. “Is that okay?”

A smile blooms across your face. Rising up to your tiptoes, you kiss him again—a soft, reassuring peck that he immediately leans into, seeking out your touch like a flower in the sun. “More than okay,” you breathe, feeling the way his lips stretch upward against yours. “I’m glad, Hobi.”

Hoseok sighs into your mouth, a slow smile settling across his features. “Now it’s your turn,” he says, and in an instant, he’s swept you off your feet, one arm beneath your bent knees and the other around your back. “And I’m planning to take my time with you, princess. You’re not leaving here until I say so.”

You wrap your arms around his neck, crossing your hands at his nape. “Fine by me,” you tell him, earning yourself a wide grin. His lips seek out yours again as he carries you down the darkened hallway and into the shadowy depths of his bedroom, pausing only to nudge the lightswitch on with his elbow. Golden light suffuses the room as he steps forward to lay you on his bed, your back sinking into the plush mattress and dipping further when he joins you. He hovers over you with an arm on either side of your head, and you reach up to trace the vein that lines his biceps with a gentle fingertip, giggling when he gives your bottom lip a punishing nip.

The kiss deepens from there. Hoseok parts your lips and seeks out your tongue with his own, subduing it into compliance. By the time you pull apart, all the oxygen has left your lungs, leaving you flushed and gasping. Hoseok chortles breathlessly and trails down to press a kiss to your navel, before traveling downward until he’s reached your clit. Gently, he wraps his lips around the sensitive nub, rumbling with laughter when you buck against him.

“So needy,” he murmurs. To your displeasure, he straightens back up to kneel between your spread thighs, but your complaint quickly dissolves into thin air when he edges forward until his knee is pressed against your aching clit. Desperate for more friction, you grind against him, your wetness soaking through his jeans in a matter of seconds.

It doesn’t take long for pressure to build up in your belly again, winding tight as a coiled spring. Hoseok is staring down at you, transfixed, and his undivided attention only serves to bring you closer to the edge, teetering on the very brink.

“Look at you.” His voice could almost be described as a purr, if he weren’t so utterly canine in mannerisms and appearance. “Such a greedy little thing, all desperate to get off. You’re making a mess of my new jeans, princess.”

You’re too far gone to care about the teasing lilt that colors his tone. The edge is rapidly approaching, and one last roll of your hips is enough to send you over, your walls convulsing around nothing as you ride out your high.

Hoseok doesn’t wait. In an instant, he’s back between your legs, having moved so quickly you didn’t even see when he’d started or stopped. His tongue darts out to lave at your folds, a growl rumbling through his chest when your hips jump on instinct. Immediately, he tightens his grip, strong arms winding around your thighs and anchoring at your waist to render you helpless in his grasp, only able to take what he sees fit to give.

“How is it that you taste even better than you smell?” Hoseok muses as he leans down to suck your clit into his mouth, lips curling up into a pleased smirk when you gasp out his name. “Cute,” he says, releasing the nub in favor of descending to your drenched entrance instead, flicking his tongue shallowly inside before withdrawing with a chuckle.

“Hoseok—” you begin, only to dissolve into a moan when he sheaths two fingers inside you without any warning, curling them up and in until you’re shaking in his grasp.

“Come for me,” he commands softly. “Go on, let me hear you.”

And you do, chanting his name like a mantra as a wave of pleasure overtakes you. Hoseok’s thumb circles your clit in just the right way to prolong your orgasm, and it isn’t until you’re cringing from overstimulation that he finally relents, descending down to mold his mouth to yours in a searing kiss. His lips part yours, tongue dipping out to explore as he sheds his shirt and shucks off his ruined jeans. His skin, when he presses against you, burns hot as a furnace wherever it touches. Against your stomach, his cock stirs back to life.

He’s gentler this time. Every movement is slow and deliberate and tender as he breaches you, murmuring your name reverentially as he fills you again. Your body bows to his willingly, stretching to accommodate him, and the spike of pleasure that lances through you when he bottoms out is almost enough to send your oversensitive body over the edge again, your walls fluttering around him.

There’s an unmistakable shift in the air when Hoseok starts up a slow rhythm, leaning down to kiss you again. His lips move against yours, soft and tender, before moving past your jugular and down to the crook of your neck, elongated canines scraping against the delicate skin in a silent question. You wind your arms around his neck and nod, giving him his answer. There’s no need for words.

And then his teeth are sinking into the spot he’s so lovingly scoped out, breaking the skin. Your body collapses into a searing orgasm, and the pleasure intermingles with the pain of the bite until you are delirious, rendered boneless in his grasp. Hoseok’s hips stutter, his pace growing erratic as he soothes the wound over with his tongue.

You’re prepared for the swelling this time, but the fullness still manages to knock all the air out of your lungs, bordering on painful as his knot grows. Hoseok quells your whimpers with tender kisses, the instinct to comfort his mate paramount even as he paints your walls with ropes of creamy white. He traces a path from your lips down to where he’s marked and claimed you as his, imbuing your skin with a litany of praises that warm you from the inside out.

“My mate,” he murmurs, reverent. “Finally.”

You lean into his touch with a tired smile. “Finally? How long have you wanted this?”

His lips curl into a smile against your clavicle. “Ages. If I’m honest, I think I fell in love with you the day you set my tail on fire when we were kids. It’s always been you, {Name}. Only you.”

You can’t help it—you need to hear it from his mouth again. “You love me?”

Hoseok chuckles. “Of course I do. My tricky little minx—my perfect, pretty mate. I love you more than anything.” One hand reaches up to caress your cheek, running along the tender skin beneath your eye before cupping the back of your head so he can mold his mouth to yours. “Love you more than I can even explain,” he breathes, punctuating each word with a kiss. His hands blaze trails down the slopes of your body until he finally anchors below the crook of your legs. “So why don’t you let me show you instead?”

And he does. Over and over that night, and in the two days of his heat that follow, he shows you exactly how he feels. Propriety is forgotten, left by the wayside with his scorned fiancé and marriage. He is yours, and you are his.

Consequences be damned.

⇢ aftermath.

also set in this universe:

[myg]

6K notes · View notes

justwonder113 · 3 years

Note

I saw that you're gonna start writing haikyuu fanfic and !!! I have a request if you don't mind. Daichi with a girlfriend (or partner if you prefer writing gn) who is usually very tough (not necessarily stoic or mean) they're pretty physically strong and generally have spent their lives looking out for themselves and everyone else(v self sacrificial... probably to an unhealthy degree) and daichi and them have a fight and they just sorta break down about how they always have to look after themselves and everyone else and how no one's ever been the one to protect them and they just want a moment where they don't feel like they have to fight all the time, perhaps ends in fluff? Idk if you like the idea I would love to read your take on it but if not that's totally cool!:)

Hi there, thank you so much for an amazing request like this it was an amazing challenge for me and I really hope you like it, I'm really sorry I haven't been able to update it earlier, it's just it turned out harder than I imagined, but I'm really glad I finished it, I really enjoyed writing it maybe it's because I know the feeling but i don't know, I hope this is what you had in mind and I hope you will like it too.

Daichi x ( f)Reader (but nothing's really implied so basically I think it's gn, have to proof read it again.)

WARNINGS:Angst to fluff, mental breakdown and anxiety attack, also a reader who isn't somfortable showing their emotional side and is more of a lone wolfs who can take care of everything by themselves.

Word cound; around 3k

You didn't even know when you started shielding yourself from everyone and everything or when was the first time you thought that you had to be the one in control of everything all strong and all, but it was part of you now definitely. You didn't think of it as something bad and you certainly didn't expect that your timidness could lead you to having an argument with your boyfriend.

For as long as you knew you were the one taking care of everything, you dealt with your own stuff and sometimes even helped others with theirs. It was always like that and at this point you just got used to it.

You liked the fact that you were this reliable, strong and independent person in the other's eyes. It made you feel better about yourself. Just knowing that people felt like they could trust you and come up to you was kind of ego boosting. It was also good knowing that there were people who looked up to you and admired you.

You were fine with keeping up this image if you knew that you made others feel at least somewhat better with your words of advice.

You knew how important it was sometimes to just let everything out but you were not like so many of your acquaintances, you couldn't just go to someone and vent out everything you had in you no matter howuch you trusted them or how approachable they were. Firstly, if you were to open up to someone you would need to have really deep trust to the said person, and secondly you just couldn't vent out because you knew how it felt like to be on the receiving end.

You loved your friends and you would move mountains for them, you really appreciated that they felt safe with you and trusted you, but sometimes being on the receiving end all the time and taking all this negativity away from them was really emotionally draining. Like some people would come up to you whining about all the drama in their lives and how miserable they were, they would let out everything and then would just leave without even asking how you were doing. You just couldn't do the same to the others no matter how much you were going through, you wouldn't burden them with your problems and all your drama. Even if it meant storing everything inside for all eternity.

Well it wasn't like you didn't want to let your emotions out and vent out everything to everyone, to let someone else help you bear this burden at least once, especially at times when you felt most vulnerable, then dealing with all this seemed impossible, whenever you were so stressed that it was affecting your lifestyle, you couldn't eat drink or sleep normally. Or whenever everything seemed to pile to the point that you felt this horrible tightness in your chest area, when your stomach was swirling nonstop and you felt claustrophobic, when your breathing was shaggy and your mind was foggy yet wouldn't stop working and kept coming up with all those unnecessary thoughts. Those were the times when you truly felt that no matter how strong and capable you were you didn't want to be alone. You didn't want to be this strong person for just this moment, you didn't want to be the one in control you wanted to be the one taking cared of and being pampered. You wanted to just let go knowing that someone was there to listen to you, to hold you when you finally fell apart.

You thought that maybe you were shielding everyone from this side of you, you didn't want to burden them, you didn't want to come as overbearing and maybe you were shielding yourself from them too, because what if others found you annoying, too weak, fragile and unable to take care of everything. Maybe they would find out that, in the end, you were nothing special, you were too pain and just not worth it, so it was a perfect defence mechanism.

You weren't doing anything wrong right? So then why was it the reason you got in the fight with your boyfriend? Why was something that was meant to protect you this much pain? And why couldn't you say anything even after this? Why were you still terrified of speaking up? You were talking about Daichi whom you trusted with your whole life. A man who was willing to be with you trhough thick and thin. You didn't know anyone else who was more reliable and kind or sweet like him. You felt thankful everyday that you had him by yourside, he made almost everyday better for you.

Maybe that's why you were so afraid to speak up? That he was so perfect? Maybe after seeing this side of yours he would realize how much more he deserved. He would realize how flawed you actually were and that you were not worth all this trouble and that terrified you. You were most definitely not ready to end things with him, not that you were thinking that you would ever be. Daichi was the one thing you wanted constantly in your life, you were hundred percent sure of it. He was really precious and dear to you even though he didn't really believe you now.

You felt that you were slowly losing control over yourself and gripped yourself tighter, to make you feel more safe. It felt like the walls were closing down on you and you felt claustrophobic even though you were on the balcony and the chilly wind was hitting you in the face. Your whole body was trembling but not from the cold weather or your chilly out of place attire. You felt numb like there was nothing inside you, only this heavy thing on your chest and all this thoughts that were only making things worse.

What was the time even? You lost track of it trying to regain yourself, it had to be really late, as you watched horizon you noticed that sun would soon start to rise, you stayed up all night huh? Daichi would wake up soon too to go to work too, how could you avoid him then? You didn't know what to tell him, what to do. You coudln't even go to bed, to lay next to him, you felt guilty because you knew that as much as you had your reasons to act this way he had them too and he also was in pain because of you, because he thought that you didn't trust him and didn't love him enough. You felt terribly guilty because you couldn't even manage to say anythin after he opened up to you, after he showed you his vulnerable side. Daichi wasn't the one to openly talk about his emotions so you knew what it cost him too. You hated yourself so much for it.

You couldn't really stop the tears at this point, any second now you would fall apart and you didn't even know if you would be able to pick yourself up before he woke up.

"Y/N?" You heard a deep grumble making you jump. You looked back to see your boyfriend looking at you with wide eyes. In seconds he was next to you wiping your tears away, scanning your face carefully. "You're freezing! What are you doing here? Didn't you go to sleep? What about your clothes? Where is your robe? You will catch a cold!" He kept mumbling to himself while rubbing your cheeks gently, he looked completely awake now. How did he care about you so much after you hurt him this bad, how did he not leave? Why was he so worried about you? Were you really worth it? Why did he really love you? So many whys were piling up in your head.

You felt this tightness against your heart and you doubled over holding your chest tightly. The sobs kept breaking our from your mouth and your whole body was shaking uncontrollably. Daichi immediately took you in his arms and took you inside sitting you both on the bed and wrapping a blanket around you to at least somehow warm your freezing body. His large hands immediately found their place around you as he helped you sit on his lap, rubbing soothing circles there and there to help you calm down whilest murmuring against your neck to just keep breathing.

"I'm here love, you're safe, you can let it all out." He mumbled and placed a kiss on your shoulder. "I'm not going anywhere... You're safe, I'm here with you." You continued sobbing you couldn't really stop now, it was as if the dam was finally broken, you couldn't really hold anything in even if your life was on the line Daichi was the only one grounding you. Thankfully Daichi didn't even think of letting go, he held you in his arms and let you let everything out. It felt like you've been crying for hours, eventually fatigue must have taken over because the next thing you saw was total darkness.

When you opened up your eyes the first thing you noticed was the brightness, it must have been at least noon now. The next thing was two arms still being tight around your frame. Your head was still on Daichi's shoulder. He must have moved you both because both of you were under a blanket now, still in yesterday's attire. You felt a bit sore, but that must have been from sitting for hours on the balcony. Your head hurt like crazy, it felt like you had one of the worst hangovers, you could swear you could hear slight ringing.

"Are you awake love?" Daichi asked quietly to check if you were really awake, he shifted slightly groaning quietly, it made you jolt up which was a bad decision because your head hurt even more now.

"Were you like this all night? God I'm sorry it must have been so uncomfortable!" You felt guilty seeing that he spent all night sitting against bed frame having you in his lap. It must have been really uncomfortable.

"It's fine, I didn't really want to let you go. How could I, I think it was the first time I have ever seen you cry. It scared the hell out of me when I saw that you were not in the bed and then it scared me even more when I saw that you were on the verge of breaking down on the balcony at 4am. How are you feeling now?" He took your hand in his and looked at you expectantly. You froze, it was what you were afraid of, you made him worry so much and he saw how pathetic you could get, on top of it you made him spend whole night like that just because he felt responsible of you. "Okay I can hear gears in your head shifting and based on your look right now I'm pretty sure you're thinking unnecessary stuff. Just don't hold back talk to me, please?" He looked at you with pleading eyes, squeezing your hand tighter.

"I made you worry, and you spent the whole night holding me in that uncomfortable position all because I couldn't hold it in and was weak." You mumbled in shame.

"Who said that I thought you were weak?" Daichi asked and he honestly looked dumbfounded.

You took a deep breath and looked away. "I'm saying it, I hate it when I can't control my emotions and act like a whiny crybaby. I hate whenever it happens, and everything seems out of my control, and I especially hate it there's another one to witness it. I don't want people to see how weak I am." You finally said it and looked down in shame wrapping your hands tighter around your frame. You looked up when Daichi pinched both of your cheeks and inspected your face again. "Ow Dai what are you doing?" You whined.

"Had to make sure you were human and not a robot." He smiled at you and kissed your hand. " I will tell you a secret, I have never thought that you were at least somewhat close to being weak, in fact you're probably one of the strongest people I have ever met. I admire you, I really do. You're so strong, confident, this powerful person whom everyone loves and admires including me." He placed another kiss on your temple, "you don't know how proud I am to be called your boyfriend! And I don't see this habit of yours as something bad, I was out of line yesterday and I really hurt you saying that you don't trust me or love me, it was never my intention to make you worry this much and seeing you in that shape because of me really broke my heart. I know you trust me and I know you love me, you never fail to make me realize it. You're always there for me whenever I need it, through thick and thin, you always know what goes in my mind and always help me with whatever you can, I can't really count how many times you have helped me. You make every day brighter for me and I can't help but feel thankful that I have you. You don't have to worry about it okay? It's just that I got insecure and it really got to me that's why I was on edge yesterday and provoked an argument." He rubbed his neck sheepishly when he noticed that you were dumbfounded, he took a deep breath to continue. " It's just that seeing you being all reliable and approachable made me question if I was doing at least remotely good job being there for you too, you're always doing everything on your own like you don't need anyone else to do what's needed and I was worried that you would realize that you didn't really need me. I guess it was my own way of saying that I needed some sort of confirmation." He rubbed his neck looking away from you, "I know you're capable of taking care of yourself and that you don't like showing your vulnerable side, that's completely understandable but you're a human too. You shouldn't just hold everything in, you have to let it out at some point and I want to be there for you when that happens. I like that you're always there for others, for me but I don't want you to forget about yourself, I want you to think about yourself more. You're amazing, the most amazing human being and I thank the stars everyday that I met you. But when I see you struggling hut still trying to shrug it off to play it off because you don't want to burden anyone or just because you're not used to asking for help really breaks my heart. I can't bear to imagine that something like yesterday can happen again. I've known you for years and no matter how much you try to hold it in I notice when you're struggling. I know you have been stressed a lot these days, you don't eat nor sleep like you used too and there's also some other signs. I wanted to give you time, you would approach me when you felt like it but when you never did I started questioning whether or not was I a reliable partner for you. Now I realize I was just feeling pretty and how much my words actually hurt you." He leaned his forehead on yours, "I'm sorry love." Listening to all this you could feel your your eyes start to water up but somehow you didn't really feel the urge to bring yourself together asap, you felt oddly comfortable.

"Have I ever told you that even tears look best on you? God how am I so lucky?" Daichi teased you and started littering your face with kisses making a smile break from you. You smiled fondly as you started to play with his hair, Daichi only hummed in appreciation. "Man, how am I so lucky?"

"Shut up, you're being sappy." You tested, Daichi grinned.

"I'm not the one in love with a sappy person," his eyes tingled with mischief.

"Well, I can't deny that, it's very much true." You purred and gave him a kiss, "I'm helplessly in love with a sap, who is the most amazing boyfriend, he's the most loyal, kind, dependable and amazing person, who makes me happy every day. I trust you the most and I know that I can count on you any time of any day. I didn't approach you because I didn't want to affect the mood, your life has been going on great and I didn't want ro ruin your good mood. I also knew that part of my problems were caused by me so I wasn't really in the mood to talk about it and I knew I had to be one to take care of everything, well I thought I could. Mostly I didn't want you to think I'm weak, I'm not that confident and powerful and I have many flaws I was kind of afraid you would see it and realize that you deserve better" you sniffed and rubbed You nose, you felt vulnerable, it felt as if you were naked and were showing yourself to Daichi, every word was stained and forced and it made you really uncomfortable but you wanted him to know everything, he deserved it. Daichi gripped your hand tighter to encourage you. "It's just I've been dealing with everything on my own since I remember, it was always me, at first it was really lonely but when people started noticing my independence and resourcefulness I kinda grew into it, it was like a confidence booster, but after that when I really needed help, when I was unable to come up with solutions I found it impossible to ask for help. I'm supposed to be strong I'm supposed to be smart so why am I asking for help to others? Can't I deal with this? I just can't find the power to go up to others even when I know that it's most reasonable thing. I know I can rely on you and you don't realize how much of a breather it's for me, and you help me in so many ways and I think you don't even realize that. I'm trying to say that I will try better and I will make sure to get over this problem but I will need time, but please remember that I really love you and I trust you with my life and I will do my best to make sure you know it okay?" You were amazed, it felt like something lifted of your chest and Daichis smiling face only made the feeling stronger. Tears were still streaming down your face but you didn't really care, this was who you were and you wanted to show it to him.

"You're not perfect love and you will never be" your heart skipped a beat at Daichi's serious tone, you felt terrified because it felt like the moment you dreaded the most, you knew he loved you but you also knew he was one of the reasonable guys, "the word is already flawed because nothing in this world is perfect, not you, not me and not everyone and not everything. Everything has it's flaws I have them as much as you do. You don't need to be perfect and you don't need to work yourself to fix your flaws. You are who you are and that's why I love you, I love everything about you including this so called weak side of yours. I love that you strive to be the best but I don't like that you're bringing yourself down to achieve it. You're amazing, you're capable, you're kind and you're smart and god you're so beautiful both on the inside and outside. I think I'm lucky I'm even breathing the same air as you, " he smiled cheekily at you making you giggle. "I want to say that you don't need to fix anything this is who you are and I love and support you, but if you want to improve I'm here and I will help you every step of the way. I will be always there for you, you don't even have to tell me anything just somehow point to me that you need me and I will do my best, we can talk about it for hours or we can just sit in silence for the whole night but you will know that I'm with you, just please don't be afraid to approach me, I will never judge you and I will never turn my back on you. In fact" Daichi got up and went to one of the drawers only to take out small box and return to you. You looked up at him with wide eyes. " I didn't plan on giving you this het because I wanted to plan this romantic evening but I think it's a good idea to give it to you now. Y/n you're the love of my life, and as cheesy as it sounds you're my sun, my moon and my stars, you make me feel more alive than I ever was and you just make everything better. I can't promise you a wedding or something in the near future but I want to give you this to let you know how serious I am about you and this relationship. I want to give you this as a sign that I will be there for you and I will love you till the rest of my days. I love every part of you and I want to help to teach you how to love them too." He put the box on your palm after he finished speaking, you were speechless, and torn between wanting to jump on him and drown him with kisses and proclamations of your love and curiosity of the box. You opened the box to find that beautiful ring you were eyeing few weeks ago when you went out with Daichi.

"I think I fell for you harder." You mumbled still in shock, you stared ar your new ring with lovesick eyes, which by the way sat perfectly on your fingers.

"well look who's being a sap now," Daichi grinned and kissed the hand you put your ring on. "But either way it's good because since I didn't go to work today I demand my cuddles now and I expect to be given them now, few kisses would be nice too." You giggles and got closer to him.

"Aww is my babyboy feeling needy?"You teased but still started kissing his face, Daichi smiled and nodded his head, holding you by the waist tightly. You smiled and got closer to him, everything felt just perfect. He really was your safe heaven.

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