#THIS CAME TO ME IN A DREAM

[galwednesday]

dog butler barking at the door for thirty seconds before opening it for guests

[rabbidart]

Oh, why can't you for once

Disregard the world and run to what you know is real?

Take a chance with me

Take a chance with me

[alwerakoo]

Trans Dipper HC: Their parents are transphobic but Dipper was introducing himself as a boy from the start and Stan never even thought to question it, so when their parents called asking about their "daughters" he was like "SHIT DID I ALREADY LOSE ONE"

[kod-lyoko]

[heyitsspaceace]

we’ve all heard of twink death to dilf birth but i raise you dilf death to twink birth

[abisalli]

bring your kid to work day 

★bonus:  he’s impressed 

[whosbian]

[phoneduk]

[Dick, Jason, and Tim in a mall]

Random Tiktoker: "Hi, excuse me can I ask you guys some questions?"

Dick: "sure!"

Random TT: "what are your names?"

Dick: "Dick, Jason, Tim"

Random TT: "...excuse me?"

Jason: "it's the idiot's name"

Random TT: "oh, uhh, alright, who's your guy's favourite billionaire?"

Dick: "Ted Kord - total Dilf energy"

Jason: "Oliver Queen"

Tim: "Lex Luthor"

Random TT: "why are they your favourite?"

Jason: "He's a total Dick but his son's hot"

Tim: "what he said"

[frownyalfred]

a post patrol report on the Manor back steps, observed by Bruce Wayne:

Dick: yeah so I found Jason on my way back home from patrol—

Jason, who’s been chain smoking since Dick put him down: you didn’t find me. I flagged you down.

Dick: because you were in a trash can and couldn’t get out.

Jason: are you — oh my god, I’m too hungover for this shit.

Dick: you’re not hungover, you’re concussed.

Jason, blowing smoke everywhere: same thing

Dick: NO. not the same thing!

[eggnogtoast]

is this anything

[seventyone-71]

having an autism meltdown all by yourself handsome?

[straight-edge-hippy]

[theperksofbeingstupid]

[madeleinefjall]

when you thought it was a raccoon in your yard but it's just a vampire eating rats

[lacm-ac]

A Farcille for your enjoyment

[morphimus]