#again and not tell my mom like i actually think not having any physical contact w anyone even just like touching someone’s hand or whatever

[elen-tari2]

My Kastle Scene Wishlist

I’m not sure what Kastle content we might get in Daredevil Born Again, but there is also talk that they might make a new Punisher show. What are some scenes/parallels that you would like to see between Frank and Karen? Here’s a few of my musings

Reversed Hospital Scene! I would like to see Frank momentarily panic over Karen getting hurt and have a turn holding her hand in a hospital bed. I feel like we deserve this scene so bad. (Caveat: Frank CANNOT be the reason Karen got injured, even if it’s just she got shot in the arm or has a concussion; Karen is in dangerous situations regardless of Frank being near her or not and he needs a wake up call for that). Bonus points for the total opposite of telling her to walk way—this time HE GETS IN THE HOSPITAL BED and puts his arms around her and just holds her and Karen gets to feel completely safe for a few minutes. Just go all out with the hurt/comfort trope for these two. Anyway, I have a whole WIP fic devoted to this, so honestly it has become my top wish to see some parallels drawn with another hospital scene.

Karen gets to help in a fight and shoots someone. I feel like since they never got to have the Wesley conversation, a way to show-not-tell would be for Karen to kill a bad guy and then Frank come check on her to be like, ‘hey are you okay?’and she’d be like, ‘yeah, I am.’ She’d be a bit shaken up but grimly holding it together because it’s not her first time killing someone. This would also work in contrast to the scene where Amy shoots the guy in the hall and then Frank infamously takes the gun from her and takes the responsibility of his death away from her. Sorry to make Karen suffer because I know she’ll feel bad about it, but I’d be okay with seeing her character go a little bit darker to save someone’s life. She’s been carrying that gun since DDs2, she deserves to take out a baddie on her own and it’d be a great segue into rehashing some of her past that Frank NEEDS to know about

Frank meets Paxton Page. Will the show make time for this? Probably not. But damn do I want to know what Frank would say if he knew that Karen’s dad cut off his only daughter, when Frank would do anything—anything—to spend one minute with Lisa again. I’d love to see Frank go to Fagan Corners with Karen to put flowers on her mom and brother’s graves. We spent three seasons of Frank being able to open up around Karen and talk about his family with her. Meanwhile she has never once said anything about the losses she’s suffered. Frank needs to know and I don’t want it all jammed into one big backstory dump where she tells him she killed her brother and Wesley in the same conversation. Another option would be for Frank to accidentally visit Karen on the anniversary of her mom/Kevin’s death and she is having a breakdown. If we can’t get into any of Karen’s past, have Frank find out Karen has his burner phone saved in her contacts listed as Home. I’ve seen that idea in several different fics and it just needs to be canon. They are Home to each other.

A scene where Frank holds Karen all night and they don’t have sex, but it’s profound. (Think like Spike holding Buffy). If they are nervous about comics fans being mad about Frank Castle finding love again, give us some physical intimacy and closeness where you know they mean everything to each other but can’t cross the line and make things real. Fan fic writers will know we won and then fill in the rest for those cowards.

If they’re willing to make Kastle real, give us a goddamn kiss. Actually, just let them have sex, because Karen Page has been forced to stay chaste for YEARS and she deserves to get laid. And Jon Bernthal seems to be more than comfortable doing sex scenes soooo please just make it the most beautiful thing ever filmed because they are so in love with each other. It has to be noticeably different in tone from the scene with Beth. And Karen cannot get shot the next day, don’t even start with any of that bull$hit trauma for Frank.

Kastle pillow talk scene. Since it’s Disney Marvel now, I don’t know how much we can hope for with a sex scene. So the pillow talk scene that follows had better be some life-altering confessions of love and cuddles. Do not even think about him sneaking out before she wakes up like he almost did with Beth. Karen deserves something good to happen to her for once, let her have a perfect night and a gentle, soft morning after. She deserves it even if Frank isn’t sure if he does.

Karen Page and Dinah Madani Friendship. I’m rewatching The Punisher s2 and one thing that pissed me off was the scenes of fake bonding between Dinah and Krista Dumont, drinking wine together and discussing men (Frank and Billy, who else). So. To make up for that, we need some genuine female friendships, like Karen and Dinah going to a shooting range together or gym or going out to a nice bar for girls night. Even if Frank has been keeping his distance, these ladies have struck up a friendship and Karen has someone to hang out with besides her lawyer coworkers.

Karen gets to meet Micro/The Lieberman family AND Curtis. David knows how Frank really feels about Karen. Curtis needs to find out Frank DOES still have something good holding him in this world. And Karen should meet Frank’s friends.

Okay those are some of the scenes I want to see for Frank and Karen! If someone could please get this list to the Punisher writers for the future of the show, it’s actually very important that we get some of this or I’m gonna have to come write for the show myself. 🙈

[nerd-at-sea5]

i have a cold atm. so uh. yellowjackets when they’re sick headcanons!

jackie - will go to school if she’s coughing/sneezing a little, but the moment it gets worse than that she’s in the office asking to be taken home. does make a big deal out of it and is kinda dramatic. is aggressively helpful whenever any of her friends are sick (meds, reading articles, getting homework, telling jokes, whatever she can do to be helpful)

shauna - dislikes being sick to the point that jackie has called her mom for her to pick her up multiple times bc shauna refuses to acknowledge it. will contact teachers at 6am letting them know she’s missing school and asking for the work. hates taking care of other people when they’re sick. will sit outside jackie’s room reading to her but won’t go inside

nat - fucking hates being sick bc she feels pathetic/useless whenever she is. normally when she’s sick she goes 1-2 days ignoring it, then lottie makes her stay over and takes care of her. nat also rarely gets sick. like she’s gone years without having to stay home from school, however when she’s sick, she’s sick. is really good at taking care of people but she only does it to people she really likes (lottie, van, laura lee and akilah)

lottie - has never gotten sick in her life. likes to joke that her brain is fucked enough so her body just decided to never mess with her. is one of the most caring people when someone’s sick. she makes nat stay at her house until she’s better, she’ll bring matzah ball soup to shauna (she did accidentally give shauna salmonella once bc she fucked up making it but it’s fine), gossips with jackie, will binge movies with van, catch tai up on homework, read books to laura lee - she’s the best person to ever be sick around.

van - is a lot like nat except they don’t succumb to it after 3 days. they’ll just keep going till they physically cannot anymore. tai once forced them to stay at her house bc van threw up twice during practice and nat had to drag them to the locker room. will literally only be around tai and nat when they’re sick because they hate it so much. (they’re dysphoria skyrockets when they’re sick) nat and van once got sick together and they just watched movies for 38 hours straight until lottie showed up and made them take medicine

tai - the moment she thinks she’s even a little sick she takes medicine, contacts her teachers and coaches and then sleeps until she’s fine again. refuses to be sick for more than a day so she never is. envy’s lottie for never getting sick, will not be around any sick person aside from van. she’ll just drop off someone’s homework for them and that’s it. the only person she tolerates around her when she’s sick is her mom bc she’ll sing to tai and tai is ok with her mom taking care of her (no one else. ever)

laura lee - just burrows under blankets until she’s better, when she’s sick it almost always means throwing up sick and since she’s the oldest her parents will stay home with her (if they can’t they have the second oldest) she just gets quiet and sad and a lot of the time lottie and nat go to her house to cheer her up (it’s the only time her parents don’t judge nat). (in the case of my nb laura lee hc - i think their dysphoria also gets worse when they’re sick, bc they’re whole body hurts and they’re hyper aware of their chest)

misty - freaks out and thinks it’s WAY worse than it actually is, had taken herself to the ER for a head cold before (she was fine). normally will just hangout with her mom and listen to show tunes until she’s better

[jewish-vents]

My right wing family likes to laugh in my face about how the left hates us. We live in a state where Neo Nazis have a compound in the woods where they shot and killed multiple Native American women and at least one black man. The right is not on our side. The left is not on our side. But all my family cares about is telling me how they were correct and I was wrong. I don't know if they think "I'm on the right!" will save them. I have no evidence to suggest that yelling that would save their lives. To a Nazi you're still Jewish and to a Hamasnik you just gave them a second reason to kill you.

I wish I had a mom who asked me if I was okay. I wish I had a dad who gave me advice. I wish my brother would stop texting me news stories of the latest celebrity that came out as anti-Jewish. I wish my sister would stop relentlessly bringing up how every musician behind every song I listen to hates me (she's a DJ, she has a lot of music knowledge). I wish I had someone to spend Shabbat with.

After having had anxiety attacks for four months of Shabbats straight, ten times so badly that I threw up, four times so badly I dissociated and don't recall 5+ hours of the evening clearly, I've stopped talking to them other than to copy and paste "I don't want to talk to you." I woke up Friday morning with physical pain in my chest. I was terrified of having to spend time with them. And then it hit me: I didn't have to, this time. I didn't have to be insulted and made fun of and have the entire dinner table laughing at me, to my face, even when I hyperventilated or cried or stopped interacting with the world and just sat there staring at nothing.

My mother texted me today telling me that not coming over had "hurt" her. I replied, "I don't want to talk to you. I want to talk to the person who raised me who actually cared how I was doing. You messed me up so badly that I'm considering going no contact entirely."

She asked me if I really wanted to be completely alone.

I said yes so quickly I didn't even have time to blink before I sent the text. I would rather have absolutely no one than my "family". The biggest obstacle in my continued efforts not to relapse into alcoholism and self-harm is them. The world's antisemitism was not unexpected. Them kicking me while I'm down again and again and again was beyond my capacity to imagine and I just can't take it anymore. I have no idea how I've stayed sober. It is a miracle that I haven't injured myself. But I can't keep going and continue to put up with this.

This last Shabbat I slept. I was so exhausted I just laid in bed and caught up on my sleep. I work for a suicide hotline, I deal with a lot at work. I don't sleep well. For the past four months, I wasn't sleeping well Thursday nights/Friday mornings, especially.

Even if the world somehow went back to normal, this last year has completely broken any bonds there were between me and my family. And even if everything somehow resolved itself, I wouldn't want them back. I don't want to be around people who used me as a punching bag during their times of stress.

I wish I had a family. I don't wish it badly enough to interact with the one I used to have.

.

[bakedbakermom]

a prime example of why i don't fucking talk to my mother

tw my mom, weight stuff

so my mom and dad currently have some form of custody over my niece (almost 14, i don't know all the legal details, it's mostly a handshake thing) because my brother is an abusive alcoholic piece of shit and his ex-wife can barely manage to take care of herself, let alone a child.

part of their arrangement means niece spends part of every summer with her mother back in her home state. niece just returned from such a trip, and by her own admission, had a miserable time; ex-sil was working the whole time, so niece was mostly alone playing video games, and her phone wasn't working down there so she couldn't even keep in contact with her friends (or me!). she has some social and developmental issues and has shown a marked regression from where she was before this trip.

my mom's biggest concern though? her weight. with no friends and no physical activity and nothing but [notoriously obese home state foods combined with ex-sils' terrible cooking skills] had some kind of impact on her weight. how much, i don't actually know, because i'm a decent person and didn't ask, and also because my mom doesn't exactly know what healthy looks like on anyone, let alone an adolescent girl.

my mom says she's not going to address this directly with niece (hey wait is that growth?) and instead quietly replace all the food in the house with "healthier" options in the hopes of slimming niece down without her noticing (nope that's not growth, that's despicable actually).

this is the woman who encouraged me to drink SlimFast shakes in fifth fucking grade. i shudder to think what her plan is.

my mom is tall and naturally slim (though she has taken it to a truly horrifying place in the last few years, which is part of why i never see her - it hurts and it's triggering). niece takes after her mom, who is short and chubby. that, btw, is not at all a dig. i am also short and chubby. i have spent the last 20 years learning not to hate myself for that, for not looking like my mom, for not living up to her standards. for not being tall and skinny like her, like my sister. i tried, and nearly died for it.

i hate that my mom thought this was okay to gossip with me about, when she knows my history (however much she denies her role in it). i hate that i don't want her to see me, don't want her in my life, because what if she's judging my body too, gossiping with other people about me too? i don't want her in my daughter's life, either, for the same reason. eating disorders are a complex interaction of nature and nurture, and i'm fighting tooth and bloody nail to save my own life and protect my child from both.

but most of all i hate this for my niece. i hate that her bodily autonomy is being undermined. i hate that the person who is supposed to be watching out for her, teaching her, guiding her, is instead tricking her and judging her and gossiping about her. my mom always claims to be a safe person to talk to, a judgement free zone. she is NOT. "oh honey nothing you could ever say would upset me - wait you're suffering??? how dare you! do you want me to kill myself in front of you to show you how much that hurts me?" (i am paraphrasing, but not by much.)

i wish i could cut her out of my life completely without risking the contact i have with my niece. i wish i felt strong enough to tell her to shut the fuck up any time she brings up food or weight with me. i wish i could scream at her at the top of my lungs - for the sake of me now, and me then, and my niece, and my daughter, and my sister (who despite being the clear favorite did not get out unscathed either), and frankly every girl on the face of the fucking planet.

at least i won't have to talk to her again for at least a month. longer if she forgets my daughter's birthday again.

[crimeronan]

god i know i keep half-tongue-in-cheek saying that my dad is literally belos owlhouse but. i've apparently gotten a little desensitized to Just How Bad He Is (because i have ESCAPED, YAY) & so today has been a delightful adventure.

i wrote an AITA post from his POV about stuff that happened several years ago, bc i was curious about how bad he'd get dragged - i updated the timeline but the Only fact i changed was the reason for his Woes (i blamed COVID economic struggles, which actually makes him a Hero compared to the truth. the truth being so ugly i'm not gonna detail it here good god).

i kept it true to POV by only using things that he actually did say to me at the time about why he was doing the things that he was doing, & blocking out all the relevant info about why the wronged party (me) was so upset, & having him praise his daughter (me) and go "i love her so much :) she's so smart and independent and i would never hurt her :)", & having him half-assedly admit he might've sounded unreasonable/angry/malicious, in a way that was clearly supposed to earn Good Dad points for being so Willing To Admit Imperfections, despite a continued constant doubling-down refusal to answer questions about actual important shit or fix anything ever.

cannot emphasize enough that this was not a fictionalized/embellished/creative POV. the only points of fiction were 1) my dad did not write these things on reddit, he said them to me in real life word for word instead and 2) this happened many years ago, not like... yesterday.

anyway the thread blew up and the commenters were all so kind and genuinely worried for me (as in, the daughter) and offering so much help that i hopped on a diff account to be my past self so i could reassure people i'm okay & had a plan in motion for gettin' the hell outta dodge. because i felt REALLY BAD that they didn't know i..... did in fact get out. people were so nice it made me actually fucking cry jesus CHRIST. i had in fact perhaps forgotten that these things were all as bad and worrying as they were

now. this is all a very serious and harrowing-sounding prelude to the actual point of this post, which is. a bullet list of some of my FAVORITE FUCKING RESPONSES. revel in these with me i had so much fucking fun. i have taken DOZENS AND DOZENS of screenshots to peruse whenever i need a healthy dose of Perspective

here they r:

you are CARTOONISHLY EVIL?

HOLY ABUSE BATMAN

DO BETTER. RIGHT NOW.

did you even listen to yourself writing this. HOW

there's something seriously wrong with you. like on an intrinsic unfixable level

hey this happened to me too! my parent died and i had a party about it btw

your daughter is never going to speak to you again after this

(note from the future: yeah)

you're going to act confused and sad when she goes no-contact aren't you

(NOTE FROM THE FUTURE: HE SURE FUCKING IS)

i think you are creating your own problems and then getting mad at them. maybe instead you could not do that

is this ragebait. i can't imagine anyone this horrible actually existing

this isn't ragebait. i can tell this isn't ragebait because I Know This Kind Of Man So Intimately

you are the asshole on literally so many levels i'm going to write a 15 paragraph response line-by-line dissecting everything wrong with you

are you aware that you're lying or are you literally this incapable of 2 seconds of honest self-reflection

i need to donate to a gofundme for your daughter right now immediately

(note from the future: i am not going to scam people by pretending a long-done sitch is a current emergency on gofundme. have no fear.)

wow. okay i'm gonna go hug my mom and thank her for not being you

you are Actually Literally Empirically the Actual Literal Worst Parent who has Actually Literally Ever Existed

HOW FUCKING DARE YOU????

WHO DO YOU FUCKING THINK YOU ARE.

I AM A 57-YEAR-OLD MOM OF FOUR ADULT CHILDREN AND THE MERE THOUGHT OF DOING ANY OF THE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE HERE MAKES ME PHYSICALLY NAUSEOUS

these vibes are so skeevy. leave her the fuck alone????

along with ASTONISHINGLY accurate inferences about exactly what was happening with the daughter (me) in all the missing missing reasons & like..... exactly how the situation was So Much More Ugly And Horrifying than an innocently confused i'm-so-well-intentioned dad-POV post would have you believe.

so. anyway. that was literally the most validating experience i've ever had in my entire life. i know i've said he's a bad guy before but i also always forget just how far beyond the pale he is. like wow that was. that was not a normal average human experience to have growing up huh.

IN CONCLUSION.

if you guys are ever wondering why i am the way that i am about, like........ anything....... everything....... whatever......

just remember.

i was raised by belos owlhouse.

[fcknstar]

hi hi, can you do more dating Harry Osborn headcanons for tasm 2 Harry?

,, love me "

harryosborn x reader

a.n : sorry for being very inactive, i got some requests and m working on it.

warnings :

**lowercase intended**

meeting you has to be one of the greatest gifts hed ever received

younger him would pray for the most beautiful girl to be in love with him, to find him someone like him

" oh god, if youre there please hear me out. mom told me about soulmates and its like this pair being meant to be together and i want to find mine. i want her to be pretty and be like me so that we have alot of similarities. “ harry prayed hard and hoped to find someone that was meant to be his. after a few years, harry prayed again. “ so i learnt that we cant choose who our soulmates the way we want them and should just accept them with open hearts, so id want to find my soulmate before anything bad happens to me or her…or him? i dont know. god, please open both of our hearts when we cross paths. “ 

harry believed in the read string myth which originated in japan. harrys mother would constantly tell him about finding soulmates and it intrigued harry. despite seeing and hearing his parents fight and quarrel day and night, harry was determined to find love which can reverse a curse which he didnt want to run in the family. 

when harry first met you, he found you annoying, someone who was tad bit cheery for his liking. over time hed grow fond of you. which ended up in you dating him.

id like to think that you have a part time job as a barista at a cafe down the block. harry would often often visit you and have a drink, while watching you work. 

hed love to drop his things and just look at you. he is often afraid that the day when he has to leave, he wouldnt be able to fully look at you, so hed spend most of his time looking at you. if not, spending time with you. 

harry enjoys having you hold him, or vice versa. he needs to have some contact with you.

he is very understanding, and doesnt like to create fights because he didnt want you to suffer the way his mother suffered. 

despite harry knowing that youd like to be your own independent person in terms of money, hed most likely slip an extra hundred or so in your wallet, in hopes that its enough.

harry wont force you to do what he wants you to, he knows youre a very independent person. if you want to work, that salary is only to be used for your needs and wants. this doesnt mean that he wont shower you with money, which is very often.

harry knows you like korean and spicy food. hed start to learn how to have a higher spice tolerance, but wouldnt mind to spend extra to order takeout from different restaurants. 

saying that hed treat you like a queen is an understatement. harry would give you all the love that you deserve, would worship every part and inch of your body.

if youd say that youll “ never know how love feels like “ hed make it his own mission to shower with immense amount of love. this can be vice versa.

hed be open to helping you order or ask if you were too scared. but hed be very very proud of you even if you took a small step out of your comfort zone. 

correct me if im wrong but harrys the type to pul your chair closer to his because he feels the need to protect you and be near you 24/7

hes secretly vv possessive

when he saw he'll always be with you and watching you, he actually means it. he has eyes and would constantly have them to report back to him

talking to a guy? harrys jealous. make any physical contact? harrys burning with fury. catches you or the guy you are talking to make eye contact? he would want to stomp right in your conversation. 

being possessive doesnt mean hes insecure in his books. he just hate the thought of someone having you in their heart.

[the-hinky-panda]

The Preacher's Wife Series: Escape (Part I)

TW: Domestic spousal abuse: emotional, mental, physical, and sexual

Hank’s in love.

Again. 

It’s too soon, the wounds from the previous relationship still fresh, still stinging. But he thinks back to feeling Maggie pressed to his side, her hand in his, her head resting against his shoulder. It was one of the only times that he actually followed the speed limit back to her rental, trying to draw out the time. He can’t get it out of my mind just how perfect everything had been. He certainly doesn’t believe in romantic nonsense like soulmates but the feeling of watching Maggie walk into the cabin by herself was like watching a piece of himself go with her. 

Maybe he is starting to believe in soulmates. 

Either way, the problem remains of her husband and the process of getting her and the two children out of that mansion in La Jolla. He can’t contact Maggie directly so he approaches the next best thing, Maggie’s sister, Stitches. She’s been the medic for a couple years now and hasn’t mentioned anything specific about Maggie and her marriage. She’s hinted at being concerned for Maggie, always excited for Maggie’s visits to Santo Padre. But never has she brought up to the club a fear for her sister’s safety. 

Stitches is organizing her medical supplies in the treatment room in the clubhouse when Hank finally tracks her down. He’s only been back from Big Bear Lake for two hours and he can’t shake the conversation he had just earlier today in the truck with Maggie. He raps lightly on the open door. 

“Stitch, you got a minute?” 

“Yeah, absolutely.” She stands up and immediately starts scanning him, looking for any injuries. 

“I’m fine,” he waves her off. “I, uh, I actually wanted to talk to you about your sister, Maggie.” 

Concern immediately clouds her face. “Maggie? What’s going on with Maggie?” 

“I ran into her, up at Big Bear Lake.” 

Stitches’ concern dissipates immediately and she breaks into a big smile. “Oh yeah, she was heading up there for a conference.” 

Hank smirked. “Conference.” 

“Ah,” Stitches leans against the exam table. “So she told you about her other ‘job.’” 

“She did. My mom likes reading her books.” 

Stitches’ grin gets wider. “I’m sure the next time she’s visiting, we can stop by and see your mom if you want. It’ll do Maggie good, finding people who enjoy her books. She doesn’t get to have that satisfaction too much.” 

Hank smiles at that but then gets to the real reason for his visit. “Has Maggie ever said anything about how her husband treats her?” 

All positivity drains from her face. “I know he’s an asshole. Emotionally manipulative and a bully. I’ve been stashing money and family heirlooms for her in preparation for her to leave but she keeps telling me the timing isn’t right yet. Her publisher is also holding on to her royalties as well. Why?” 

“She just said a few things that concerned me. Wanted to get a clearer picture from you.” 

Stitches’ mouth is a firm, tense line. “What things?” 

The words are so bitter on his tongue when he says them. “I think he’s hitting her.” 

“That son of a bitch.”

She starts to move past him but he puts out a hand and catches her shoulder. The explosion is expected and he is prepared for it thankfully. “Now hold on. You know if that’s true, we do have to wait on her.” 

“Dammit, I know.”  She emits a frustrated noise and kicks the small trash can. “Shit. I had no idea he was hitting her or that it was even a possibility. He’s so focused on goddam appearances I didn’t think he would do that.” 

“It seemed like she let it slip when we were talking. She said it was never anything to go see about at a hospital or ER. I don’t think anyone knows.” 

“Course not. Simon Peters needs to keep his reputation clean or he could lose that money machine of a church. Can’t have a wife sporting bruises and casts…” Stitches pauses in her rant, her eyes going wide. “Oh my God. Her foot.” 

“She mentioned breaking it but didn’t say how.” 

Stitches returns to pacing the small room, her face thunderous. “I knew it. I knew Simon had something to do with her broken foot. The bones on the top of her foot were just snapped. She had to have metal pins and plates in there to fix it. She said her foot got caught under a box and she lost balance and fell backwards. It sounded fishy to me but she assured me that’s all it was.” 

Hank feels that sick feeling settling in his stomach. “What did it look like to you?” 

“It looked like someone stood on her foot and pushed her backwards, that’s what the breaks looked like.” Stitches lets out another sound of anger. “Six years! Six years, she’s been stuck in that house with that asshole! And I didn’t…” her eyes flood with tears and she covers her face with her hands. “I didn’t know, Hank. God, I didn’t know.” 

“What the hell is going on in here?” Bishop appears in the doorway. 

Tears are still streaming down her face and gives both Hank and Bishop the most helpless look. “My sister needs help.” 

Bishop turns to Hank. “What kind of help?” 

Taza appears at Bishop’s shoulder, peering into the room. “What’s going on?” 

“Stitches’ sister needs help,” Bishop says. 

Hank fills in the rest of the information. “Abusive husband.” 

Bishop nods. “He armed? Security guards? What are we talking?” 

“He’s the pastor of a megachurch,” Hank answers. “Lives in a mansion in La Jolla.” 

“The kids,” Stitches says. “We need to get the two kids too.” 

“Alright,” Taza puts his arm around Stitches’ shoulders. “We will. You talk to her, find out when would be a good time to get her and the kids out.” 

“Safely,” Hank adds. 

“Safely,” Bishop repeats. “In the meantime, if we have something coming up that needs attention, I’ll make sure at least three guys stay behind to help. You pick them. Okay?” 

Stitches wipes her eyes with her sleeve. “Okay. But don’t you have to bring this to the table or take a vote in Templo or something?” 

Bishop  glances at Hank and Taza, who give him minute nods, and he shakes his head. “No vote needed this time. Sometimes, we’re just all in agreement.” 

[eldritch-queern-magicat]

Actually, no, I haven't really changed at all since middle school. I'm still the same deeply creative weirdo with ever-growing eclectic interests. A happily blooming nerd. If I learned about something in school, I wanted to explore it at home, on my own. That's really how the electronics disaster happened. I'm actually incredibly grateful Mom and Dad monitored my Internet use. I am way too curious sometimes. And I have to see shit for myself extremely often.

I wasn't let back out properly as a specific part until sometime in the sixth grade. It was partially the cats, but also realizing Nanny probably wouldn't be around much longer. So when she did die, I was more relieved than anything else. I used to feel bad that I hadn't cried for her.

But she was stifling me and trying to tell me what to be. She didn't like me being curious about makeup? I was low-key kinda thrilled when I got makeup for Christmas in my senior year of high school. I like color. A lot. I used to constantly change my favorite color. Now I just say I love the entire rainbow.

And I had to hide that I absolutely loved Pokémon. I think she thought it was glorifying violence, but it's more like competitive high-contact sports. Either that, or it was the racism. Frankly, probably both. It's probably the one thing she might have been worse than foster care about. But honestly, watching all the stuff that had to do with entirely different cultures was so good for me. It still exposed me to to new ideas and lessons when I actually needed it. Among them, I started passively absorbing any little bit when Taoism or Buddhism were significant themes. Paired with Bible study on Saturday morning, I guess I managed better than I thought.

She was surprisingly ok with when I was really into western fantasy like Sabrina the Teenage Witch. I think she was also ok with Power Rangers and ThunderCats (the original). At least she validated my love of learning new things and legit gave me old text books (that I don't know where she even got) to look at science subjects at home.

I think that really started in the seventh grade when I got so obsessed with astronomy and in particular, black holes. It just amazed me how unfathomably massive the universe is. How far it goes, how long even light takes to travel through it. I couldn't help but find the divine in the actual, physical cosmos. And it was there with every part of it. I would think, ‘How can everything in this physical reality be bad if God had said it was good in the beginning? Surely we haven't corrupted everything. Cats and dogs know about compassion, in a sense. That's good and beautiful.’

It wasn't hard at all to be better than foster care, but she actually was. She did encourage me to ask questions if I was confused. She clarified a lot of the literalist theology so I could start to understand it. I think I asked to study the bible with her, with that very hope. According to Dad, she could keep up with devout Catholics. I had two different children's bibles at her trailer, plus she bought me my own standard bible when I was ten, for my birthday. She and Mom took me to the book store at the mall, and had them print my casual first name with my last name at the bottom right corner of the front in silver letters.

Fun fact, someone actually jokingly asked if I'd grown up Catholic because of my apparently deep knowledge of Christianity. That was during the summer last year. The irony of my current proximity to the nearest Catholic church is not lost on me.

What fucked me back up was how I was treated during high school a lot by peers and family, and largely I just got angrier more than anything else. I was trying my best to do better when it all started going downhill fast again. But apparently I was still not good enough. My cousins suddenly became spoiled brats because of my needs frequently not being met entirely, but they seemed so much better adjusted. They didn't understand, and I didn't know how to break my silence. So I started lashing out because i really didn't have the social skills I needed. So yeah, I was definitely an asshole at times. The bullshit from foster care got a refresh, and I was forced to submit to their training again.

Never had any serious issues with Grandma, though in typical moody teenager fashion, I was sometimes a brat.

There's a reason I didn't really come out of my shell again until my junior year of high school. I decided to try to be more brave the year before, since I knew I'd graduate in Ohio. I got better at my art and creative writing, and it seemed to give me a way to connect with others. I decided to go for the culinary class at the career center because hey--good food--and the only thing that was in question was my literal birth date and legal age restrictions with the student restaurant. I got in. Mom and Dad made absolutely sure it was paid for. So I decided to do another nuts thing and go try out for the spring musical. I met one of my closest friends that way. Truly a charismatic character (gonna tag you, @themerrymutants I miss you). I felt accepted and encouraged, like family is supposed to make you feel.

Memories are really just flooding in now, it's a just lot to process. Maybe it's because while answering the person on anon, I opened up a lot of my own psychological cupboards. I never really said a lot of that at once, let alone even explained my logic behind it all. It put a lot of things into perspective for me.

And I just can't help but think, oh, shit, I actually am competent. But I was constantly second-guessing myself because so many of the people around me were hellbent on judging everything I did. Now I understand that in those cases, they most likely feared how authentic I am. Some people, more or less depending on where I was at any given time, thought I was pretty cool because I was so authentic.

I stopped fronting almost entirely when Mom died. I still hadn't recovered at all from literally anything, and didn't know how to handle that. It took cycling through different roles to find something productive for me. I shattered, and ended up pushing most of my remaining idealism into the then-evolving Lilitu.

But I was always at my best when I was true to myself. There were still plenty of people who loved me for who I really was. And that was just enough to keep going. That is precisely what fueled my spite against others who didn't like me. And Mom sure as fuck never quit going.

-Era 🍎😺

[musicallisto]

Hii! Congrats for your 1.5 followers, I’d love to join your celebration event! Could I request a 🐚 for the Grishaverse? <3

my pronouns are she/her and I’m asexual biromantic (so any gender is fine). I’m an ESFJ and a Gemini. I have green eyes and brown hair, I have a mullet with blue strands. I dress with vintage/fairy grunge clothes. Long skirts and corsets are my fav type of outfit I wear lots of rings and nekclaces and love to exchange them with others.

I’m the mom friend of the group, always there for everyone and my friends say that I’m really good at comforting people. I’m also calm and responsible, I usually am the one that takes care of other people. I’m very optimistic, I always try to see the good in everything and I often put other’s needs before my own. I love making others laugh to lighten the situation. I’m not afraid to stand up for myself or for someone else but sometimes it’s hard for me to say no to things. I also dislike when someone is too serious and really can’t take a joke as I tend to use humor as my coping mechanism. All my friends tell me I’m very smart, I get very good grades and I do well in school. I also try to help my friends with study and school as much as possible.

My love languages are, receiving, physical touch and words of affirmation and giving, quality time and words of affirmation.

I absolutely love listening to music, it helps me relax and I really like reading. I also love watching horror movies even though it’s impossible to scare me. I also play Dungeons and Dragons with my friends anytime I can. also, I absolutely love musicals and I’m definitely a theatre kid.

I really hope I did this right, have a great day and congrats again for your milestone! :)

ohh I think you would pair exceptionally well with someone who is very dear to me... the one and only nina zenik.

oh, so you like recieving words of affirmation and physical touch, you say? well get ready, because nina will shower you with compliments until you quite literally don't know what to do with yourself, or what corner of ravka to hide.

she's so generous with her praise, and though it comes out in a teasing way, too, you can tell it's different when it's directed at you, like her pride is shining through the words.

"you're doing such a good job at killing the bad guys, maybe we'll make an actual ravkan soldier out of you yet?"

and of course, physical touch is paramount for nina, especially as a heartrender. she loves skin to skin contact, whether it be tracing abstract patterns on your wrist or involuntarily drumming her fingers to the racing beat of your heart on your thigh.

and when you get scared, or anxious, your hand always finds hers, and it's like your entire being melts. whether that's simply from the natural warmth of her touch or her grisha powers, you're not too sure, and you aren't too keen on figuring out either.

she'll happily sing any musical you want with you!! yes, of course there are musicals in the grishaverse, how else would we get people like jesper epitome of theater kid fahey otherwise? now, we all know nina's prowesses in singing are... doubtful at best, and no one knows this better than the crows, but you don't mind. her enthusiasm is key, and she gives you great feedback when it comes to the acting and emotion!

she'll even mock cry when you hit a particularly challenging high note, or breeze through a difficult run, and then will pull you into her arms for a loving peck.

"you're my little singing bird, you know that?"

she'll absolutely try to scare you by every means possible, never discouraged by the fact she oftentimes ends up scaring the other crows instead. kaz HATES this (because he's the one who's always startled from nina's antics, and he has reputation to uphold!).

don't worry about her being too serious or not taking your jokes well—sometimes it's you who has to pull her back into line because she's being silly. but at least it means there's never a dull moment when you share a life with her <3

[myfixationacademia]

SO! a few days ago i decided to start drawing Bakugou and maybe do a series where i make my own versions of some of the MHA characters in my style along with a couple of headcanons i have.

The headcanons are under "read more" along with a surprise >w>

-Katsuki was named by his dad as a homage to Mitsuki, who had to go through emergency surgery after birth while Masaru rocked lil baby Kacchan in his arms trying to calm him down, eventually the newborn falls asleep when Masaru hums some lullabies to him, the moment he was no longer in his father's arms, Kacchan woke up with one of the loudest cries in the hospital, his mom still remembers the migraines;

-Katsuki met Izuku after the boys met on a sidewalk and they talked about heroes and all of that, unknowingly introducing All Might to Deku, but neither tell each other their names until they meet again with their moms, both women shocked that their sons have met already;

-After the incident in the river, Kacchan forced Deku to walk far from him, claiming that he did not need his help, however, years later he confessed that not only he regrets knocking his hand away due to pride, but also because he actually sprained his ankle in the fall, so he was walking weird on the way home and had to put on a cast and a gel for his muscles that smelled really bad, the blonde does not get angry when Izuku bursts out laughing when he said that "the gel smelled just like my grandma";

-Speaking of grandma, Masaru's mother had accused Mitsuki of cheating on him because, in that family, every one of her sisters had granddaughters, Masaru was quick to cut ties with her but she came back when she heard her grandson was now the number one hero, she said that he was honoring the family name, only Because Masaru did not want his mom to argue with Mitsuki and that was the compromise they got cause otherwise he would have taken her name, and that it was natural cause they were a family of winners and victory was in their blood. Mitsuki argues that Katsuki did everything on his own, sometimes in a pool of his own blood, but the old lady is persistent that SHE had something to do with this success, only for Katsuki to drop the bomb and also announce his and Izuku's wedding and that he would take Deku's surname, the woman starts yelling at Katsuki before Deku promptly picks her up along with her luggage wheel bag and puts her outside, asking her to not bother them, she still tried to show up to the wedding but thankfully she didn't;

-One of the reasons for Bakugou to give his 1-A classmates weird nicknames is because Bakugou has a certain difficulty in remembering names, he can remember faces really well, hence the nicknames being based mostly on physical features like Mina having dark scleras, Iida is the only student with glasses, Todoroki's split hair, but not names, it can take a long time for Kacchan to memorize the name of someone he just met, also hence why Izuku's nickname is one based on the kanjis forming his name, not his appearance;

-Katsuki develops poor eyesight like his father once he grows up a bit, by his second year at UA, he started to wear glasses and contacts;

-Masaru was the one at home most of the time to take care of Katsuki while Mitsuki went out to work, and while father and son were there, Masaru taught Katsuki how to cook, clean his own room, take out the trash and other domestic activities around the house that needed to be done, leading to Bakugou being the one responsible at the dorms in assigning the activities of each student in his class as well as teaching how to do them the proper way;

-Katsuki starts wearing hearing aids after the war, as his hearing was compromised a bit during combat, and his...nap, it helps that he was already learning sign language;

And now the surprise, i think you all remember the healer Deku drawing i made, well, out of curiosity i decided to see if there were any differences in their height and...I was not disappointed in the slightest

LOOK HOW SMALL DEKU IS XD

[notwhatyoucameherefor]

Family dynamics for my silly humanstuck au

Because having every family consist of two siblings and one parental figure felt really forced. All lussi are humanized.

Megido: Damara is the Handmaid's daughter, and Aradia is Ram Mom's daughter. The Handmaid is trapped in the clown cult and playes basically the same role she does in the comic. She gave Damara to Ram Mom because her position in the cult prohibits her from having kids at all and keeping her around was putting both her and her kid in danger. They were both raised by Ram Mom and told they were siblings, but Damara knows that's a lie because she was there for the cult stuff and Aradia knows because she has any level of observation skills.

Nitram: Nitram is in quotation marks because they are in no way related. Rufioh is a kid in the same neighborhood as Tavros who hangs out at the same places and shares a lot of interests and helps Tavros with his school work and personal issues. Their relationship is sibling like enough in nature that they just refer to each other as their older/younger brother when referring to them in conversation. Summoner is Tav's dad, Tinkerbull is Rufioh's dad who considers Tavros honorary family.

Captor: Captor is also in quotation marks bc they're not related either. The biclopse lussus has been split into two people for this au and Sollux and Mituna are honorary family by virtue of their dads hanging out a lot. Mituna calls Sollux his cousin for convenience. Sollux explains the situation once to new people and from there on refers to him with an extensive inventory of mean spirited nicknames.

Vantas: They actually are related so uhh here's a fun fact that is fun. The Signless (grandpa in this dynamic) was a pastor (and also the Dolorosa's adopted kid btw. This gives the Mariyams and the Vantases a really weird relationship) and bc of that Crabdad is super aggressively religious. Kankri will tell you he's Christian because "he believes in the message not the literal interpretation" and then explain to you why organized religion is evil in the same breath. Karkat is 100% atheist and pissed that it's even a thing he has to think about on a daily basis.

Leijon: They're also just regular ol siblings. Meulin has cut off contact with everyone but Nepeta and doesn't get invited to family stuff though, she had a really big falling out with everyone over her involvement with the clown cult. Nepeta was too young to get the full details of that and doesn't really care enough to ask questions. They talk daily and have a good cool relationship.

Mariyam: The Dolorosa adopted Grub Mom way late into her life which is why Porrim and Kanaya are the same ages as Kankri and Karkat. Kanaya and Porrim are both test tube babies. They actually have a healthy functional family dynamic so idk what else to say.

Pyrope: Once again not related. Don't even live close enough to physically meet up. They met online through epic gaming and Latula became kind of a sister figure for Terezi after they bonded over the shared experience of needing to raise yourself because your parents didn't. (Terezi's dragon mom is alive and loving and she gives the best advice ever but she's also too bedriddenly sick to do much actual work. And I'm thinking Latula grew up in foster care maybe.)

Serket: They're cousins who don't talk much but keep up with each other on social media and look up to each other in the way where they both go "wow she's so cool!!" online and then when they actually meet up they realize they annoy the hell out of each other. Vriska has Spider Mom (who is probably less murdery but still abusive) and Aranea has Mindfang (who is pretty absent and may or may not be deep in some really sketchy shit. Vriska and Aranea both idolize her way too much.)

Zahhak: I don't remember why I came to this decision so it may be subject to change, but I remember thinking it was clever as fuck when I did. They're blood related siblings, but they're both adopted. Into different households. They found out about each other because they went to the same school district all their lives and Equius's teachers kept being like "Equius Zahhak??? Is Horuss your brother" and after years of being like "Whomst" he eventually looked him up and realized that yeah I guess he is my brother actually. Equius stopped talking to him or mentioning him to anyone after like 3 Facebook messages but Horuss tells literally everyone he knows about it as if they actually has a sibling bond. Also the plotline of him deciding to get closer to Meulin because he saw what Eq and Nep have and went "I want that" remains the same.

Makara: I don't know (or really care honestly) if they're biological siblings or not but it really doesn't matter. Their dad fucked off out of their life when they were really little and Lord English indoctrinated them into the cult by giving them a home and family in it. (He did this solely because he was old and gonna die soon and he needed at least one trusted and devote member to raise his kid in accordance to the cult rules by the way.) Gamzee and Kurloz consider the Cult of the Messiahs their family and they live together with Calliope and Caliborn. They consider the two of them brothers and they have a secret cult dlc relationship to the Cals.

Ampora: Normal siblings so ummmmmmmm. Seahorse Dad is a rich and successful guy with a Reputation. He tried to raise Cronus super strictly but he chipped away at his willpower fast, so now Cronus is the most reckless entitled adult ever and Eridan gets everything he wants handed to him on a silver platter. Fun!

Peixes: They are siblings but they don't have a familial bond because their mom never treated the household like a family. Gl'bgolyb is also a rich successful girlboss (I mean like she inherited all of Condy's stuff and then didn't expand upon it or go out of her way to achieve anything more, but she still manages all of Condy's stuff, which is a lot of stuff.) She tried to raise Meenah to be the perfect heir but she was not down for that so all it accomplished was giving her the skills to more successfully do the opposite of whatever Gl'bgolyb wanted. As a result Meenah is kind of seen as a family disgrace. While she was trying to raise Meenah Feferi got shoved to the side as the Other Kid and was treated less like a daughter and more like a freeloader (which her constant insistence that the company's business practices were flawed did not help). But now Gl'bgolyb has no one to leave her company to except two kids she views as disappointments (She has her eye on her niece Jane though). Feferi and Meenah have started to bond a little bit (like a microscopic bit) over this, but Meenah still needs to unlearn the "you are competing against your sister for the company and if you trust her she will ruin you" mentality that Gl'bgolyb instilled into her. Also sidenote Condy's dynamic with all the humans she adopted is exactly the same as it is in canon, down to her marrying Colonel Sanders. Also the clown cult has serious beef with CrockerCorp.

Cals: As previously mentioned, Lord English (leader of the clown cult and considered to be god by his followers) is their dad and he left them with the Makaras. Calliope doesn't want anything to do with the cult but loves Gamzee and Kurloz as family nonetheless. Caliborn is her headmate and considered by the cult to be Lord English reincarnated, and boy howdy he sure is Caliborn.

[partytricks]

young royals s3 thoughts (SPOILERS!!!!)

- first and foremost i think they tried to fit waaaayy too many things into this season. it feels like they wrote two seasons worth of content and instead of trying to cut plotlines that were unimportant to the overall narrative, they just said fuck it lets do them all. and it...did not work

- LOVE the idea of wille's speech having repercussions outside of wilmon and the royal family, and i love that the hazing was addressed, but again the whole reveal about erik and august felt like it was just thrown in to have sympathy for august and to lead to wille's breakdown at the bday dinner (which like...he had more than enough reason to do already). i do like the idea of erik actually being fucked up behind the scenes, but i wish they would have hinted at it in season 2 or something instead of just dropping it out of nowhere. idk

- WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE THEY FORGOT ABOUT WILLE HAVING ANXIETY AND PANIC ATTACKS UNTIL THE LAST COUPLE EPISODES???? his anxious habits and the physical toll that stress takes on him were pretty consistently shown in the first two seasons and then suddenly not a thing until the halfway point???????? like idk something about that really bothered me. my one big hope for this season was that wille would get to address his panic attacks but it seems like theyre just not gonna acknowledge it, which i guess is true to real life anxiety it's just something you live with, but it was teased to be such a crucial thing about wille that im a little disappointed its not getting explored

- wilmon cannot communicate to save their lives and i feel like neither of them are ready to be in a relationship. they have a good dynamic and you can tell they care about each other, but they never look at issues from a dual perspective, only as an individual. and then when they call each other out they just get defensive. i think they only want the lovey dovey fun part of a relationship, and they cant accept the fact that things WILL go wrong and they have to work through it TOGETHER

- ive seen a lot of people say that wille got really mean out of nowhere this season and i kind of disagree?? yes, his aggression is def at the forefront of almost all his scenes, but we've seen in the past two seasons that he doesnt know how to deal with stress and takes frustration out on other people. it's just that now he's constantly stressed and therefore on a hair trigger. is it right of him?? no. but does it make sense?? yeah, for me at least

- i HATE that wille's anxiety is constantly pushed aside because it "isnt princely" but the MINUTE that kristina has mental health issues she gets to step back from her duties and see a therapist, get meds, etc... now to clarify, i hate it because wille deserves better and its so hypocritical. i LOVE that it was included in the story because you really get to see plain as day just how much wille's family does not give a shit about him. he was so worried about his mom because he knows what it feels like and wants to be there for her when she never was for him, but she cant even make eye contact with him. and his dad is no better. that scene where wille calls to ask about erik and his dad just goes "yeah i cant think of any of erik's flaws he was perfect" EVEN IF YOU THINK THAT YOU DONT SAY IT TO YOUR OTHER KID???? who, to wille's point, is CURRENTLY YOUR ONLY SON.

- simon dealt with a lot of shit this season, and he was right to be scared of wille during his blowup at the royals, but CALL ME CRAZY i think he couldve waited until like, idk, the NEXT DAY?? to breakup with him???? yes, wille has been an ass to simon this season and taking family drama out on him, thats not cool, but striking while the iron is hot is an AWFUL idea. bring it up while wille is in a more rational headspace and not as riled-up. like simon my bby i was with you til then

[cheswirls]

xx preview :)

-

Her hand slowly falls from his chest once her breathing has returned to normal. “My parents–”

“Are probably worried,” Sabo finishes, not letting her close that train of thought with what she’d asked previously. “We should call them, hm? Let them know where you are.”

She looks away, biting her lip to betray her nerves, and Sabo tries something else.

“You don’t have to talk to them just yet. We can pretend you’re still asleep, if you’d like. That way they get updated and you go home faster.”

She takes the words in and does another cursory look around the room. Then she points to herself. “Who else was in here when I woke up?”

He smiles. “Just me.”

“Then.” She swallows. “Can we pretend I’m still asleep for everyone out there?” She points to the curtain. “Just for a little bit longer?”

Smart girl. If she’s still unconscious, then they still have no one to contact. His smile widens. “Tell you what. If you give me your name, I’ll keep your secret for another hour. Then we’ll call your parents together. Deal?”

“Yeah, okay.” She nods slowly. “It’s Bonney. Bartholomew Bonney.”

“Spell it,” Sabo says, and quickly pens it out on her forms as she does so. “Perfect. Let me check a few more things, Bonney, then I’ll let you get some more rest.”

“Do you have water?” she asks. “My throat is all scratchy.”

That makes sense, considering the tube she’d had down her esophagus during surgery. He confirms and rises to grab the cup he’d filled with ice water earlier, turning the straw in her direction and letting her take the plastic in both hands before releasing it. 

“How old are you, Bonney?”

She moves her lips from the straw to answer. “Fifteen!”

Hm. Younger than he’d thought. “Do you know your weight?”

“Forty-three, I think? Mm!” She perks up. “And a hundred and fifty-two centimeters!”

“Very good.” Sabo smiles as he scribbles the numbers in. “Blood type?”

“Oh.” Bonney shakes her head. “I don’t know that one. Mom is type A, if that helps?”

“That’s fine.” He leaves the box blank. “We had you on O when we did your transfusion. Nothing wrong with that if we need another.”

“Transfu-what?” She makes a face. “Is that what this is?” She points to where the needle is embedded in her right wrist.

“Close!” Sabo clicks his pen and leans forward. “You’re on a morphine drip, so that would be an infusion. A blood transfusion is where you get new blood pushed into your veins.”

“Huh.” Her eyes drop, Sabo notices, to his nametag. She mouths it twice before trying to say it aloud. “Anything else, doctor Say-bo?”

“Sah-bo,” he corrects lightly. Bonney flushes and he chuckles, finally leaning back. “I’m not a doctor yet. I’m actually finishing up medical school. This is one of my final rotations.” He sets the clipboard down and puts her water cup to the side when she moves it in his direction. “Let me check your eyes real quick.”

“Huuuh.” Bonney leans back, lost in thought. “Saaaaaaaaabo,” she tries again, drawing the vowel out. “Wait, my eyes? What for?”

“Checking pupil response.” He returns to her side with a light in hand. “I want to walk you through a few things to make sure your brain is working properly.”

Bonney carefully keeps her eyes wide as he shines the light into each, doing her best to hold still. “Did something happen to my head? I don’t remember hitting it or anything.”

Sabo puts the light away and uses her left hand to test some motor skills. “Not physically, in that case. We weren’t sure, so we were being careful. Always good to be cautious.” He clears his throat, trying to think of a simple way to explain the next bit. “When you lose a lot of blood, your body can’t resupply any to your brain as quickly as it can to other areas. Too much blood loss for too long starts to affect how your brain functions, so I just want to make sure things are normal.” He has her do one more thing and then smiles, satisfied. “Which they appear to be.”

“Oh, goodie.” Bonney leans back again with a big sigh, the tension dropping from her shoulders in a comical manner. She sits quietly while Sabo scribbles notes onto her file. 

Sabo doesn’t consider the quiet a bad thing until it’s not quiet before, Bonney sniffling behind his back. He looks over his shoulder and stops writing in alarm when he sees fat tears streaming down her face. Her hands are clenched into the thin sheet she’s pulled up to her waist, and her legs are curled up so her knees are even with her neck.

Sabo sets the clipboard down and hurries over. “Does it hurt?” he asks, referring to her side. Her new position leaves her torso straightened out enough to where it shouldn’t really bother her, so he leaves her be instead of trying to uncurl her.

“No,” she chokes. “I just–” She bites back a sob. “I’m so stupid! I don’t know what I’m going to tell my dad.”

Sabo minutely relaxes and does his best not to sigh. He’s not . . . really great at this aspect of patient care. But, well, he’s done alright with her so far. And her hour wasn’t up yet. It wouldn’t be fair for him to grab someone else to better console her after he’d already made her that promise.

He settles heavily on the free space on the cot and tries to think about what Ace would do. Ace had always been better with kids than Sabo. He’d come home from his rotation in pediatrics and talk Sabo’s ear off about how much the staff loved him; meanwhile, that same staff had barely tolerated Sabo during his own rotation in year three. (It was fine, he’d decided after brooding about it for long enough. People had different strengths, and working with young people clearly wasn’t one of his. At least not at this point in his life.)

Sabo isn’t Ace, though, and Ace isn’t here to tell him what to do. He has to figure out what works for him.

“You can always tell me first,” he starts with. “If that makes it easier. I’m bound under oath, so anything you say to me will stay between us.” A little white lie won’t hurt. Not if it earns her trust, anyway.

Bonney looks conflicted about this prospect. She’s still crying, quiet hiccups shaking her form. But she’s looking at him like she’s thinking over the offer. Her arms move up to wrap around her knees. She winces when the movement pulls at her side.

“I won’t think you’re stupid, no matter what happened,” he tries, lowering his voice to try and be softer. “I’m just here to help, remember? Maybe telling someone will be good for you, too.”

Bonney’s head drops to her knees in defeat. She nods, the motion pulling at her hair. “Okay.”

Sabo wants to take her legs and jerk them so they’re straight, if only to fix her posture so she’s not aggravating her wound. He resists, though, not wanting to risk her retreating into her shell. Instead he sits there calmly, hands in lap, waiting for Bonney to pick her head up and start her story.

“I was messing around with a friend,” she mumbles, voice hollow. “He brought one of his parent’s handguns to try out, and we were just having fun trying it out.” She lifts her left arm and mimes a shot. “The, uh, recoil? It was awful, especially because I’m so scrawny. So he helped me with a shot, except I got stubborn about it, and between the two of us we discharged the gun.” Her hand drifts back to her side. She’s crying again, voice warbling the more wet her face gets. 

“I told him it wasn’t his fault but he wouldn’t listen. He drove me up here when we couldn’t stop the bleeding, and he wanted to come in with me, and I made him leave because I didn’t want him to get in trouble!” She starts sobbing again, breathing erratically, shoulders and entire body shaking with the effort. 

Sabo didn’t want to scare her, so he hadn’t said it, but having a minor with a GSW meant they had to let law enforcement know there’d been an incident. They’d probably come in to talk to Bonney after Sabo leaves and everyone is alerted that she’s conscious. To know that there wasn’t an actual crime involved is . . it’s a strange comfort, at present.

“He won’t get in trouble,” Sabo promises. “You don’t . . .” He hesitates, visibly, but Bonney’s attention is on him now, so he continues. “You don’t have to tell anyone else what happened if you don’t want to. That’s between you and him.”

She bites her lip again, shakes her head. “My parents won’t like–”

“I don’t mean them. Or, just them,” Sabo amends. “I’m talking about anyone else in this hospital. Anyone at all. No matter who they are. I’m glad you told me, because if something had happened that we didn’t know about, and it was information that we needed in order to treat you, then it would be very important to know. But we’ve already pulled the bullet out of you, and your life isn’t in danger, so this stays between us. Okay?”

Bonney nods frantically.

Sabo can’t resist, so he tacks on, “if you end up in an emergency situation again, you should always let a medical professional know how you got injured. They’ll keep it to themselves – they have to – and the more information there is to go off of, the better treatment you’ll receive in the end.”

Bonney nods more. She’s sniffling, and still sorta crying, but she’s not being as loud about it, like she’s trying to stop. 

“And–” He can’t believe he’s about to offer to do this, but he hates seeing her so miserable. “–if you need me to tell your parents for you, then I can try. But considering it was an accident, it might be better for you to try yourself.”

“Yeah, okay,” Bonney whispers. “But do you– Um. Do you think you could tell them it was an accident? So they don’t worry?”

“I can do that,” Sabo promises. “Are you ready to let them know you’re here?”

“Yes,” she mumbles, crowding her face close to her knees again. “And some more water, please.”

Sabo does her one better: he brings her a handful of tissues and a full cup of cold water. While she fixes her face, muttering a thanks to him before blowing her nose, Sabo tucks her chart safely under his arm.

“I’ll be right back, Bonney.”

[tittyinfinity]

Venting, just having the words in front of me helps me process my own thoughts better.

Dylan and I might have just lost all our progress on house hunting again because of his dad.

His dad is the reason he's stuck in Texas in the first place. Offered a job at his dad's work, but then his dad took an entire YEAR to finally agree to it, all while telling Dylan that his family wouldn't help him get to work if he got a different job (and he made sure to tell his siblings and mom that they weren't allowed to take him either) even tho they're a 30 minute drive away from the nearest business and they're in the middle of nowhere. He also said that he and his mom weren't going to babysit, so he had to find a babysitter somehow with no money and no one to contact in the first place bc he doesn't fucking know anyone down there. And once Dylan got his car working again, HIS DAD STOLE HIS KEYS, ID, AND DEBIT CARD FOR 2 MONTHS. He found it in his DRAWER. Only reason he's working now is because his mom is charging him $800 A MONTH to watch her own grandchildren. AND SHE DOESN'T EVEN DO IT! Dylan's siblings do! His mom locks herself in her room and doesn't come out all day! SHE SAID OUT LOUD "What if I don't like my grandchildren?" "I'm not doing anything for the kids' birthdays or Christmas because it wouldn't be fair since my kids never got to do that" "your kids better leave me alone"

Dylan's dad is one of those super "alpha males" who has to control every aspect of everyone's life, and he makes sure NOT to let his kids (specifically, his sons) succeed at anything because it makes him feel inferior. I'm not kidding. He has done this every time Dylan has made progress.

Lemme tell you about just how abusive this man is.

He trapped Dylan's mom. He forced her into pregnancy back-to-back, told her she wasn't allowed to take birth control, told her no one else would ever want her because of her mom body, wouldn't let her drive until a couple of years ago and only allows her to do it with his permission and another person going with her to track her, doesn't allow her to have any friends at all, doesn't allow her to work or have her own money, etc. There's a lot worse things he does to her that I won't go into detail.

They had 9 kids. Nine. Most of them only a year apart. They didn't send any of them to school. They didn't homeschool them. They were specifically just farmhands. Literal slaves. He would stand and watch his kids do all the farming and then go kick them any time they stopped. They never had new clothes. They never had birthdays. Never had any holidays, actually. They had fake homeschooling stuff just in case cps stopped by. They weren't allowed to go to school or have friends because "he didn't want them going and saying bad stuff about him" (because he knew he'd go to fucking prison over it).

He makes sure he has control over everything. If dylans mom makes him mad, he says she better stop arguing before he hurts the kids. He will hurt and ground ALL the children if ONE person makes him mad. He uses that against them. So no one dares to mess up because everyone will get punished. Dylan is the only person who stands up to him because he's no longer afraid of him, but his family tries to tell him not to stand up to him at all out of fear.

And then with Dylan specifically.... he's the oldest son. For some reason, his dad thinks he's in constant competition with him. To the point that any time dylans mom showed him attention, his dad would tell her "well why don't you talk to DYLAN about it since he's so much better than me." Dylan wasn't allowed to succeed at anything at all, and if he tried, his dad would physically destroy his progress in order to keep him under his control.

Any time he stood up to his dad, he would beat the shit out of him (starting as a toddler), spit in his face, and call him a stupid faggot.

Dylan and his dad stay in motels during the week since their house is a 2-3 hour drive from work and they go in begween 3am-5am. Three nights ago, Dylan accidentally fell asleep in his dad's hotel bed instead of his own. He didn't know which bed was his. His dad yanked him out of bed from a dead sleep and Dylan pushed him off of him. His dad then punched him in the face and said that he assaulted him. Dylan went outside and his dad called the police. He had to drive 3 hours out of town with no cell service, trying to find his family's house in the middle of nowhere by memory only. He had to call in for two days in a row. He's not sure if his dad is going to try/be able to sabotage his job.

Dylan looked at a house a few days ago, but he may be homeless soon because his dad isn't going to allow him to go back to his family's house and that means his kids get kicked out too and he has no babysitter again.

WHY. WHY. Every time we make any progress, something outside of our control ruins it. All year I've been trying to move. All year everything has been working against me. I'm getting sicker and sicker staying at my mom's house.

I just want to give up, but I can't. It's hard to want to try when it only ends in failure and heartbreak.

[beevean]

.

Started looking for a therapist in town. Should have done it, uhhhh four years ago. Or seven months ago. But if there's one thing you can always expect of me, is being terrified of changing my routine.

Both bf and mom said that I've changed for the worse and now I give up too easily. Okay then. My mother expressed surprise that I was able to handle my father at the hospital, as apparently everyone in my family assumed I would have been too fragile to visit my dying father every day. Okay then. I may be weak, but I am also an arrogant, prideful bitch, and I despise being looked down on.

I still don't know what to do with bf. He's waiting for me to contact him first. And I care about him, and I don't want to lose him as a person. But I think the love has fizzled out for multiple reasons, including the physical distance. Also, if he keeps thinking about "our future", that is what triggers my spiral of shame that convinces me that I'm a worthless human being. Assuming that I'm able to seize my own life again - that I'm able to write a CV, that I'm able to start university again, or even that I actually start to drive, this all feels so overwhelming and I don't know where to start - I'll always feel behind him. He did all of this already, on his own. I'll always feel like I have to catch up to him. And I reject his help, I reject his compassion, I reject his "I'm not judging you". I refuse to be "accepted" by someone who is supposed to be my peer. He's even younger than me ffs.

Can you tell I used to be the smartest kid in class? :^)

I resent that all of this started from a normal argument. I accept that I messed up, because in that moment I didn't communicate. I think we transitioned from that to him being oh so concerned for my issues because I told him that I feel ashamed when he criticizes me. I never have any reason of calling him out, and when I do call him out during arguments, he can always justify himself, while I can't and I have to bow my head and apologize. This is what makes me feel humiliated and inferior. No one understands this when I try to explain it. I am incapable of explaining myself, I wish I never had to. Stop trying to look inside me, I am not helping you.

And it's not a matter of "finding myself a bf who is an uneducated farmer to feel better about myself", mom.

So there's that. Guess it's really time to start opening up the wallet to pay for someone to tell me what I already know. I hate that it actually helps.

[selfboredom]

MOTHERS MISTAKES CHAPTER ONE :⠀DESTROYING DREAMS

NEXT CHAPTER

summary :⠀When Arven went to Lab Zero, he expected to be tearing his mother apart for everything she put him through. For abandoning him. Only to find yet another that was left behind in the wake of her mistakes. But some small part of him held out hope. Hope that together they could fix things, and not let anything else be ruined by her.

ao3 link :⠀link

content warnings :⠀parental neglect

fandom :⠀pokemon⠀( scarlet version )

word count :⠀2775

        Nemona and Penny ran off after the other lab zero escapees, leaving Arven and Florian to deal with the remaining horde of ancient Amoongus. They dispatched a good few, but the hoard seemed to have barely thinned.

        “I can take care of these. You go deal with your mom, Arven.” Florian stated, already mid-battle once again.

        “But you’re a better-“ Arven said, trying to protest but getting cut off.

        “You’re as capable as me. You deserve some closure after all the stuff that she's pulled.” Florian said, looking over to Arven. “Just go and deal with her. And take Koraidon with you, he needs some closure too.” He said, shoving Koraidons pokeball into the older teen's hand.

Arven didn’t bother trying to debate further. Florian seemed dead set on him dealing with the professor. He sighed and sprinted into the massive crystallised building. The air felt tense as he stood in the massive dim tunnel. He clenched Koraidons pokeball as he walked through.

He crept towards the gaping hole in the tunnel, revealing an even worse damaged lab on the other side. He stood at the entrance for a long moment, thinking of what he was going to say.

She neglected him… Abandoned him… Yet he still couldn’t bear the thought of seeing her again.

Of hearing all the excuses, all the lies she would tell him. How she had no choice, and how important her research was.

How she still loved him.

Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes, which he quickly blinked away as he came back to reality. He took in a deep breath, taking his first steps into the lab. The interior was long abandoned. A thick layer of dust covered almost every surface. Various equipment was rusted and broken. Illegible notes and debris littered the floor. And in the centre of it, sat Sada.

She was inhumanly slouched over in an office chair, in a position akin to a corpse. Arven carefully crept closer to the unconscious woman, reaching a hand out toward her.

HUMAN DETECTED IN THE ZERO LAB. EXITING SLEEP MODE. 

He recoiled hearing the robotic voice. His eyes widened as he watched Sada shoot awake. Her movements were janky and unnatural as if she was being yanked around by an amateur puppeteer. Her eyes had an unnatural glow like a flashlight was placed behind them.

        “Ah, I’m glad you made it down here safely.” She said, her voice sounding completely flat. It seemed like Sada’s voice, but there wasn’t any trace of vocal inflection. It was inhuman, but human at the same time.

        “What… What the hell is up with you, mom.” Arven questioned, refusing to break eye contact. Sada went quiet, contemplating her words for a moment before she responded.

        “I forgot you wouldn’t be aware. I’m an AI with the real professor's memories embedded into my programming. This is the physical shell I host when need be, hence the more… Awkward… Movement.�� She explained.

        “You’re… You’re a robot?” He stammered, confusion lacing his voice. “Then where's the actual person Sada?” He asked soon after.

Silence…

        “Where… Where’s my actual mom?” He repeated, his voice beginning to crack slightly.

More silence…

        “Where is she! Where is my actual mom!” He snapped, his voice breaking more severely, pure panic setting into him.

“Arven… I’m afraid, your mother… Isn’t here anymore.” She began.

“The true professor passed during the incident that destroyed the fourth research lab. She was trying to protect one of her pokemon and… Sustained fatal injuries in the process.” Sada explained solemnly.

Arvens chest constricted tightly. He couldn’t breathe. It… It couldn’t be true… He refused to accept it. But everything pointed to the robot telling the truth…

The emails stopped…

Florian had only ever received phone calls from her…

They had only ever seen her via video call…

Before he could process it, his vision began to blur. Inky blackness entered his peripheral vision. His breathing quickened, soon turning to full-on hyperventilation. The AI professor was trying to say something, but Arven could only hear a sharp buzzing in his ears.

He clenched fistfuls of his hair, trying to ground himself. To tell himself this was some fucked up prank. That she couldn’t be dead. She would have told him if she could make a damn robot of herself…

She couldn’t be dead…

She couldn’t be dead…

Arvens legs began to give out from under him. He quickly sat on the close by pile of debris, continuing to try and calm himself down.

Sada couldn’t do anything but watch on, racking her memory data for some way to comfort the grieving boy. But… She couldn’t find anything. It was almost exclusively the professor's research.

She had basic data on who he was. As well as other important relations to the professor, such as the academy director. But there was next to nothing in her about how to interact with them. Was the professor that narrow-minded?

Sada sat next to Arven, turning to the internet for some guidance. She repositioned herself to be in front of him, taking his hand. She began reciting breathing exercises she had found, trying to calm down the teen. It took a couple of minutes, but eventually, he was a bit more grounded.

        “Can you hear me properly?” She whispered, staying in her crouched position. Arven gave a small nod in response.

He began to squeeze Sada’s hand, still non-verbal. They continued like this for another few minutes, waiting for Arven to be ready to talk.

        “I know this is difficult to process, Arven. I couldn’t possibly know what you must be feeling. Your mother never intended for things to end up like this, though. I’m sure if she could go back to that day… She would still be here for you.” She whispered. Arven’s grip tightened dramatically.

        “You don’t have any memories of raising me, do you?” He asked bluntly, not bothering to face her, keeping up his bone-breaking grip.

        “Unfortunately not. But based on the data I have available about parental rela-“ She began, quickly cut off.

        “Mom wasn’t an average parent. She wasn’t even below average. That woman neglected me for years just to focus more on her damn research. The only living being I had any relationship with was my Mabosstiff.” He cut in, rage evident in his voice. Though it was only subtle.

        “I had to raise myself the moment she could reliably leave me alone and not have the place burn to the ground. Then I started attending Naranja. The most I would hear from her after that was an email maybe once a month.” He continued, anger building in his voice. His knuckles lost all colour as his grip became painful even for the AI.

        “Then even that stopped. And all this time I just thought she finally gave up the ghost and stopped even pretendingto care. But no! She ran off and got herself killed all in the name of protecting her fucking research!” He screamed,

        “She went through all the effort of making an AI version of herself. She made a fucking replica of herself with her memories and everything. And she couldn’t even be fucking bothered to program you to send me a ‘hey your mom died’ message?” He yelled, snapping his head towards the robot.

Tears filled the teen's eyes again, threatening to spill out as he vented his rage towards his mother. Sada knew that trying to talk had no chance of deescalating the situation. The AI couldn’t form a response…

Arven eventually let go of her hand, calming himself down at least slightly. He rubbed his eyes with his sleeve before speaking again.

        “What do you want anyway? I know you wouldn’t get us down here just for fun.” He asked, his usual composure returning.

        “I am indeed in need of your help. I will explain as we go to see it.” Sada said quietly, getting up and helping Arven up from his position. The pair entered the large elevator, going down to the lower level of the lab.

        “As you are quite clearly aware, your mother dedicated her life to her research. Before she passed, she managed to build an operational time machine. Her dream was for ancient pokemon to co-exist in the modern world with the native pokemon of Paldea.” She explained, receiving a nod in response.

        “But she was extremely thoughtless in this ambition. Natural ecosystems are incredibly delicate. It can be disastrous if they’re tampered with, especially in introducing new non-native species into it. Such as said ancient pokemon.” She continued, turning to fully face Arven. “If her plan… Her dream… Were to be realised it would cause catastrophic damage to Paldea. Potentially irreparable, in the worst case scenario.”

        “They’re all down here, and the general public can’t come here.” Arven said, looking confusedly at Sada, “Why are you bringing this stuff up?”

        “Well, while the ancient pokemon are indeed contained in the walled garden of Area Zero, that wall is beginning to break down. You would have seen it yourself — the titan Great Tusk. It escaped from here. And a sign of what's to come if we continue this way.” She explained.

        “So… I need you to help me destroy that dream… And the professor's life’s work, Arven.” She finished, looking him dead in the eye.

        “Wait, why can’t you do this yourself? You would know how to shut it down.” Arven asked, “She doesn’t care about the consequences, I know. But she had to have programmed you with an emergency shutdown procedure.”

        “That’s the issue. I am unable to perform it myself.” She said dully.

        “I was programmed with the singular purpose of keeping the time machine operational. Shutting it down directly is a violation of my programming.” She explained, “But, you have the key to stopping it. Your mother's copy of the Scarlet Book.”

        “So I just use the book to shut the time machine down?” He asked,

        “It will… Likely not be that simple, unfortunately.” She said.

        “When you initiate the shutdown… My actions will be out of my control. I’ve been programmed to be a literal battling machine, unable to stop until the threat to her work is eliminated.” She said, a slight frown forming on her lips.

The elevator came to a halt, opening to reveal a massive room. The walls were lined with crystals, like a tera den. All perfectly symmetrical. It was lit with sterile white lights, causing the crystalline walls to shine like a massive geode. The floor was made of an almost obsidian-like black mineral, helping to keep the brightness of the room in check.

In the centre of it stood a lone pedestal, a gargantuan structure hanging over the top of it. The time machine. It consumed the entire ceiling, like a massive parasite looming over them. It was almost like a massive camera shutter.

The pair approached the pedestal, coming to a stop in front of it. There was a slot in the front, the perfect size for the book. Arven grabbed it from his backpack, holding it in his hands for a moment. He knew this had to be done. He couldn’t let his mom ruin anything else.

        “I believe you can do this, Arven. When you’re prepared, insert the Scarlet Book into the pedestal.” Sada said quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

        “I’ll never forgive her for what she did… But maybe when this is over… I’ll find a way for you to come out of Lab Zero. You seem different… Better, than her.” He said, looking up at the AI professor. He looked back towards the pedestal and placed the book inside.

        “…I can’t blame you for my mom's neglect.” He whispered, taking a step back from the pedestal, anticipating what was about to happen.

ID CONFIRMED: PROFESSOR SADA. 

ACCESS GRANTED. 

EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN INITIATED. 

An artificial voice boomed through the room. It caused Arven to jolt slightly, looking around for the source of it. Nothing seemed to be visibly changing until the voice started up again.

PLEASE WAIT… 

PLEASE WAIT… 

ACCESS DENIED. 

The crystals lining the walls began shifting hue. Becoming a golden colour as Sada positioned herself in front of the pedestal. He could barely see it on her face, but it was evident that she was sorry.

SHUTDOWN COMMAND OVERRIDDEN. 

REINITIALISING… 

“It is up to you now, Arven.” She whispered, the vast room echoing her voice just enough for him to hear her.

AI SADA SWITCHING TO SLEEP MODE. 

ACTIVATING OFFENSIVE PROTOCOLS… 

Massive obsidian pillars erupted from the floor beneath her. Effectively sending herself and the pedestal far out of reach. Arvens hand hovered over his pokeballs as he stared up at Sada, preparing for what was next.

        “Please… Defeat me. Put an end to this… I believe in you.” She begged. The machine above her began spinning, sparks flying out the sides. Massive amounts of energy gathered inside of it before exploding out. The shutter-like machine bloomed outwards, exposing its core. It was like a small supernova, loose energy flying out around it.

From that core came a lone masterball, landing directly in Sada’s hand.

        “At… At last…” She whispered, her voice breaking down as she spoke. “At last my dream is within reach…” She said, followed by the echoing click of her masterball. She spun around to face Arven, her eyes glowing a brilliant electric blue. Her scleras completely blacked out.

        “And you’re not getting in the way!” She shouted down to him, approaching the very edge of the platform. Her voice was becoming… disturbingly realistic. Heavy white noise underlined it… but it sounded ever more like the real professor. Arven shook his head, poising himself for battle.

Sada lowered her hand, letting the pokeball casually fall to the lower platform. A massive ancient Volcarona exploded out of the pokeball. Its wings stood taller than its actual body. Arven quickly sent out Scovillain, beginning their battle.

        The feathered ancient Salamence let out a cry as it finally fell, summoned back to its pokeball. Arven let out a relieved breath as he withdrew Mabosstiff back into its ball. Almost his entire team was wiped out, but he managed to beat the AI eventually.

        “I-Impossible…” Sada whispered, beginning to break down completely. Her body convulsed, loos sparks flying off of her before collapsing onto her knees. The walls became pitch black as the pillars collapsed, returning the room to its original state.

Sada stayed crouched, unable to stop the convulsions as Arven tentatively approached her. She seemed normal again. Her eyes weren’t glowing anymore, at least.

        “Are you alright? This… This isn’t normal… Is it?” Arven questioned, genuine concern in his voice.

        “Th-Thank you… For… everything… Arven.” She whispered,

        “The time machine… Has finally… She… Has finally… Been stopped.” She stuttered out, hugging him close. Arven froze, unsure of what to do… He’d… Forgotten, what this felt like…

What it was like having his mother hug him…

Comfort him…

Tears began welling in his eyes as hugged her back tightly.

        “You’ve grown up so much… I… Am so p-proud of you…” She whispered, the convulsions becoming worse. “I… Am so… sorry… you were alone for s-so… Long… Arven.”

        “You… You didn’t deserve this… You never could have deserved this…” She continued. The convulsions were worsening, but she gripped him tighter.

        “I know you can… Never… Forgive her… But I hope you can forgive me some day… For never telling you”

        “No… No, that’s not your fault… She programmed you that way… I can’t possibly hold that against you.” Arven said as she slowly let him go, the convulsions worsening.