#ahh the mysteries pile up

[maxladcomics]

Did anyone know that Papyrus has a dark red in his mouth when he speaks?

[thetarotwitch111]

Beetlejuice's advice - Pick a beetlejuice (Pick a card)

Happy Friday the 13th! 👻

✨help me keep doing the free pacs: tip jar

✨ personal readings - [requests open]

Good luck with Beetlejuice sweet advice...

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻

Beetlejuice

Well, well, well! You’ve gone and picked this pile, huh? You must be ready to get wild! And I mean wild, baby! Here’s the deal: You’ve been holding back, trying to play it cool, but I can smell it on ya! you’re bursting to break free and let your instincts take over. Right now, life’s been a bit too tame, hasn’t it? Like a boring old dinner party with those dull folks in the afterlife. You know what I’m talking about!

It’s time to unleash that primal side of yours. Stop thinking, start acting! You’ve got this fire in you that’s been waiting to come out, so let it roar! Whether it’s chasing after a passion, saying what you really think, or just shaking things up, now’s your moment to own it. Don’t worry about making a mess. Look at me, I’m the king of messes, and it works out just fine! You wanna go after something? Do it! You’ve got the instincts of a predator, so go ahead and pounce.

Life’s too short to play by the rules, and you know what? Rules are for suckers! Break ‘em, make some noise, and watch how everything around you changes when you’re the one calling the shots. After all, it’s showtime, baby!

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻

2. Beetlejuice

Oooh, look at you, picking this one. I can smell the love vibes from here! Someone’s looking for connection, huh? Whether it’s romance, friendship, or just some human contact, you’re in the mood for something deeper. And guess what? It’s coming your way faster than you can say Beetlejuice 3 times!

Right now, you’ve been feeling like something’s missing. You want more than the usual small talk and surface-level stuff. Well, here’s a little secret...when you let your guard down, the real magic happens! Show people that squishy center of yours, even if it makes you feel a little awkward. Hey, if I can try to marry a living one, then you can take a risk on love, right? Open yourself up, let people see the real you, and boom! You’ll attract the kind of connection that’ll make you feel alive again.

Whether it’s a deep friendship, a romantic spark, or just more fun, you’re gonna feel that spark light up soon. And who knows? Maybe you’ll find someone who loves a little chaos, just like me. So how about it? Any plans for a wedding soon? I’ve been trying to get hitched for a long time, but you…you’re a catch. Just saying.

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻

3. Beetlejuice

Ahh, you’re one of the deep thinkers, aren’t ya? I can tell. You’re not just here for the easy level stuff, no sir! You want the real deal! the big answers to those cosmic questions! And let me tell ya, you’re on the right track. You know what they say: I’m the ghost with the most, babe, and I see some serious mystery heading your way!

You’ve probably been feeling a little tug, haven’t you? Something’s been calling you to dive deeper, whether it’s a gut feeling, a dream, or just that weird sense that there’s more going on than meets the eye. Well, spoiler alert: You’re right! You’re getting ready to tap into something big, and it’s gonna blow your mind. The universe is trying to show you the secret behind the curtain, and you’ve got front-row seats to the show!

So what’s next? Start paying attention. The signs are there! those strange little synchronicities, those moments that make you go, WTF. Yeah, that’s the universe talking to ya. Don’t ignore it! Follow the breadcrumbs, trust your gut, and dive headfirst into the unknown. You’re about to discover something big that’s gonna shake up how you see the world. And let me tell ya, it’s gonna be a ride you’ll never forget. Just remember: You’re dealing with a professional here!

[danikamariewrites]

more dark batboys x dark reader pls i’d literally give you my first born for more, maybe they sit together and do a debrief of all mysteries in velaris. like the boys have been trying to solve this one criminal that kidnaps primarily men sith bad reputation and reader joyfully says oh that’s me!! :)) and their jaw drop nv they’ve been investigating for over 20 years and now they’re in awe and want to know exactly how her brilliant mind did it🧎‍♀️

Cold Cases

Poly!batboys x reader

A/n: I think this has been one of my favorite ‘series’ to write for besides the ddlg stuff

Warnings: mentions of injuries, murder, torture, and mentions of abuse

Azriel had laid out all his unsolved cases from the past decade. All missing males or murdered. He stood, his hands behind his back, as he waited for you, Cassian, and Rhysand to come in.

Rhys pushes the door open giving Azriel a questioning look. He just nods at the table and Rhys just lets out an ‘Ahh’ before taking his seat. You have your arm entwined with Cassian’s as he leads you to your seat.

You plop down kissing Cassian’s hand in thanks and turn your attention to Azriel. “What’s all this Az?” You gesture at the files across the table. Azriel sits, pulling the closest one to him flipping it open. “These are all unsolved cases. All males either missing or murdered, so I wanted to go through them with you to see if you knew anything.”

“Ooohhhh a stroll down memory lane. Ok read ‘em.” You say excitedly. A deranged twinkle in your eye as Azriel reads out some of your greatest crimes. The first three cases were duds. You were almost offended he thought you did it.

Once Azriel read out the fourth case that devilish smirk that told them you knew something they didn’t spread across your lips. You let Azriel finish before you said anything. “Yeah that was me. He’s dead, I buried him in the Dark Forest. The asshole was beating his wife, so I stopped it.”

Cassian gave your shoulder a supportive squeeze as Azriel moved the file to his ‘solved’ pile. The next few were also you. Majority dead, all in different and very creative ways, as Rhys put it. This went on for two hours and over seventy percent of Azriel’s unsolved cases were you.

The last case was an interesting one. The male was missing and still alive. You wouldn’t say what he did, it was far too vile to repeat. The female that was his victim didn’t live in the long run. “I-I wanted him to live with the pain he caused her.” You seemed to be struggling to get your words out.

The boys knew this was clearly personal. But they wouldn’t push. You’d tell them the story on your own time. “I psychologically tortured him for years. His friends and family thought he’d gone crazy, magic really helped there. Once I got my hands on him I kept him tied up for days. I broke his mind to the point where he didn’t even know who he was.” You let out a shaky breath, laying your sweaty palms on the cool wood table.

“A few days after that I dropped him in a random Winter Court village. Gave him a whole new identity and a face fucked up beyond recognition. He’s confused, alone, and scared. And he will be for the rest of his life.” Your eyes had gone distant, like you were in that Winter village watching the male. A grave look had taken over your usual chipper demeanor.

Shaking your head a little, you snap back into yourself. That smirk coming back along with the glint in your eyes. “That all of them Azzy?” “Yeah,” he nods. “I’m very impressed darling. And not a single person suspected you.”

You shrugged, standing from your seat. “What can I say? It’s a talent.” As you left the room the boys shared a look that said they were impressed yet terrified of where you draw the line.

[essenceeater]

"You're ridiculous, I love it." Hanzo Hasashi x GN!Reader.

"I don't see the asks button so I would like to politely request for some goofy ahh Scorpion Hcs because I’m amazing 😘😘😘"

WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME MY REQUESTS WERE OFF?? I SWEAR I TURNED THEM ON. Anyways a lovely fic for my friend @krysphycookiez this is specifically MK11 Hanzo. I hope you enjoy this. This is a mix of romantic and goofy headcanons with a small oneshot. The reader and Hanzo are married cause I said so. -Chaos

Characters: Hanzo Hasashi/Scorpion

Triggers: None that I can think of? Lmk if anything should be tagged here. It's Mortal Kombat, you know what to expect ig?

Requested: Yes

🔓Requests are open at the moment🔓

Link to rules

🔥Hanzo Hasashi, is known for his strong and complex personality. He's a very passionate man, but he's a little goofy when it's just you around.

🔥 Hanzo is fiercely loyal, and in a relationship, he would prioritize his partner's safety and well-being. He'd go to great lengths to protect them. He's seen things he doesn't want you to witness, it would break his heart honestly.

🔥Despite his combat prowess, Hanzo is a terrible cook. GOD AWFUL. His attempts at making a simple sandwich often lead to hilarious disasters in the kitchen. YOU'D THINK FOR BEING ABLE TO CONTROL FIRE HE'D BE PERFECT BUT NO. He's not allowed near ANY kitchens.

🔥 Y'know his friendship finisher? He has a hidden collection of cute plush toys, which he claims are "for training purposes only." He cuddles with them when no one is around. One time you walked in and he was in a huge pile of these plushies, to which you got dragged down into.

🔥Outside of his usual outfit I feel like he dresses like a homeless man 🧍‍♂️

🔥I feel would keep an air of mystery around him, making his partner curious about his past and his fire like abilities. He wouldn't want to involve you in the past even if he's still clinging to it.

🔥Despite this his fiery nature would translate into a passionate and intense love. He'd express his feelings with great emotion.

🔥YOU GET FLOWERS EVERY MONTH BUT SOMETIMES THE STEMS ARE A BIT BURNT.

🔥Despite his agility and combat skills, Hanzo is notoriously clumsy in his everyday life. He often trips over his own feet, slips on banana peels, and crashes into things when not in battle. Imagine you watched him fight someone with no problems, he turns to give you a kiss or something like that and he trips over nothing.

🔥Being serious for a moment, I feel like he will definitely train his partner. God forbid he's not around to defend you and something happens, he doesn't want history to repeat itself.

"My love what are you doing?"

The Earthrealm's warriors were used to the relentless training, the brutal battles, and the life-or-death scenarios. But there was one thing they couldn't quite wrap their heads around Hanzo's newfound obsession: cupcakes.

You were lounging in the living room of your shared home, scrolling through your tablet when you heard an unusual sound coming from the kitchen. Following the curious noise, you discovered your husband furiously whisking a bowl of batter, his mask hanging by his side as if it was just another day at the bakery he doesn't work at.

"What's going on here?" you asked, trying to stifle a laugh as you watched him struggle with a mixer.

Hanzo looked up, his fiery gaze locking onto you but he looked like a dear in headlights. "I have discovered the art of cupcakes," he declared, his voice as serious as ever.

You couldn't help but burst into laughter. "Honey, you're not allowed in the kitchen but you're making cupcakes?"

"Yes," he replied, determination in his eyes. "I was bored..." He mumbled as an excuse, but just the other day you and a friend were talking about wanting cupcakes.

Scorpion continued to wrestle with the mixer as you decided to step in. Gently taking the mixer from his hands with a soft chuckle. Together, you managed to create a lumpy cupcake batter that was a mix of all sorts of ingredients he had found in the kitchen. There were sweet and savory items like ketchup, chocolate chips, and even some mysterious spices. Did you know that? Absolutely not, is that for the better? You'll find out.

With a wink, you handed Hanzo a tray of cupcake liners. "Time to get these in the oven."

He nodded, but then his gaze fell upon the oven as he frowned. "How do I make it... bake with love?" he asked, looking genuinely puzzled. Causing you to giggle in amusement, causing him to break his confused mask he put up and laugh with you.

You smiled and set the oven to the right temperature. As you popped the tray into the oven. Hanzo stepped back, his memory flooding with flashbacks to the last time he used the oven.

A few minutes later, you were both treated to the smell of something that was part chocolate chip cookie, part ketchup-flavored cupcake wafting from the oven. You couldn't help but exchange a look and burst into laughter once again.

Your husband, however, couldn't go back to being serious, he was smiling like a child. "We shall call these 'Kombat Kupcakes,' a deadly delicacy," he announced with pride.

As you both sampled the cupcakes, your taste buds were assaulted by a strange combination of flavors. They weren't the best cupcakes, but there was no denying the effort Hanzo had put into making them.

And in that moment, you couldn't help but think, "You're ridiculous, Hanzo, but I love it."

As the two of you sat there, munching on the bizarre creations, you realized that even a fearsome fire bending ninja like Scorpion had a goofy and endearing side, one that you cherished above all else.

"You're still not allowed to use the kitchen."

"Oh come on I'm not a child!"

Essenceeater © 2023 ┃ do not copy, modify, steal, repost ANY of my content.

[madangel19]

Helloooooo so what about a one shot of Popia getting back to his hotel room after a ritual and unwinding by getting in the shower and touching himself? 🙊

Oooo, this one should be fun >:3

Warnings: Good ol' shower masturbation, polyghouls referenced

Word Count: 666 (lol nice >;3)

“Ahh, finalmente,” Copia murmured as he entered his hotel suite.

It had felt like forever since he had a room to himself. The ghouls were somewhere about spending time together. Mountain and Swiss were sharing the room with him, but it would be another few hours before they returned doing whatever it was that ghouls did whenever they stayed at a hotel. Hopefully they would sleep over in another room, but being in a ghoul pile was always nice after a hard, but successful ritual. Either option was fine with him.

Copia removed his jacket and went straight into the bathroom to wash his papal paint off. He gazed at his sweat streaked face and smiled at the man in the mirror. 

“You were amazing. Always amazing. Lavoro fantastico. The crowd loved you and your ghouls,” he whispered, turning on the water and wetting a towel. He thought of the way the whole crowd screamed for him as he sang his heart out. Some people in the crowd definitely enjoyed his more raunchy moves and he chuckled as he recalled how some poor girl nearly fainted during Mummy Dust.

“Still got it, big buy,” he crowed once he got most of the paint off. It was time to shower.

He stripped the rest of his sweat-stained clothes and opened the door to toss them into the hotel room. He would have them washed tomorrow.

He turned his attention back to the grande shower and smiled. It was one of those showers that had a sitting ledge. Perfect for truly unwinding after a long day. A bathtub would have been nice, but he would make do with this.

He turned on the water all the way to hot and waited a moment before stepping in, sighing at the comforting heat. He leaned forward, resting his forehead against the wall as he let the water hit him. 

He closed his eyes as he let his hand wander down his stomach before caressing his cock. How he didn’t get hard during shows always amazed him, but Satan worked in mysterious ways. 

A smirk formed on his lips as he recalled one of the many things he would say to the crowd.

“If you don’t have anyone to fuck, then go fuck yourself,” he murmured as he began stroking himself. 

It didn’t take long before his member got hard and he let out a soft moan at the wonderful sensation. He picked up the pace, hissing in pleasure at how hot it was in the steamed up shower. He thought of the beautiful faces in the crowd and even the faces of his beloved ghouls as he pleasured himself.

“Cazzo,” he groaned, already feeling precum coating his fingers as he thought of the way Swiss moved on his platform and how pretty Cumulus looked earlier that morning. 

The sound of the door opening in the hotel room caught his attention, but he paid it no mind. It had to be one of his ghouls. 

“You showering in there, Papa?” Mountain’s voice called out.

“Yes. I…I’m showering. I’ll be a while so…so get comfortable,” Copia stammered, biting his lip as he continued stroking himself.

“Don’t take too long or else I’ll join you, Papa. Sounds like you could use a hand in there,” Swiss’s voice crowed.

Copia chuckled at the thought. That wasn’t a bad idea.

Seconds passed and Copia let out a strained moan as he came, his warm, sticky seed leaking down his legs and onto the floor before going down the drain. He stroked himself one more time before sitting on the shower ledge, breathing heavily as he let the hot water wash off any cum that got on him. 

“Wonderful,” he murmured.

There was a knock at the door followed by an excited chirp as the lights briefly flickered in the bathroom.

“Can I come in, Papa?” Swiss’s voice asked.

“Of course you can come,” Copia chuckled, eager to truly unwind with the help of his ghoul.

[leighsartworks216]

Rice Pudding

Asra Alnazar x gn!Reader/Apprentice

I had this idea and even though I haven't played the Arcana too recently (I'm gonna replay it after this lmao), I couldn't rest without writing it out. Super short and sweet, but possibly ooc

Warnings: food, vague spoilers (as in, if you know you know), Asra being mischievous

Word Count: 821

Masterlist

AO3

The warm smell of cardamom drifted through the morning air. Outside it was already blazing hot, the sun’s glare scorching the golden sands that seemed to go on for miles. Cacti and aloe greedily soaked in the heat.

Inside, it was cool. The sun peeked through the windows, stealing the shade, but the spells carefully placed on the hut kept the temperature from rising too much. After all, cuddling in intense heat, all sweaty and gross, was not desirable.

You worked quietly in the small kitchen. Something had called to you as the sun rose, perhaps nothing more than a mere craving, but you decided to use this as an opportunity to surprise the wizard still snoozing in the other room. Asra was always slow to rise anyway, so you’d have plenty of time to-

“Ahh!” Your whole body jumped. Your heart leapt into your skull, pounding uncomfortably hard against your ribs. You could feel the rhythm in your throat and fingertips; hear it in your ears. You turned around to smack Asra in the chest. “You scared me!”

Asra didn’t have the decency to look apologetic. Instead, they snickered mischievously. Their hands - which had pinched your sides from out of nowhere - smoothed sweetly over your waist instead, thumbs rubbing just below your ribs. “I couldn’t resist the temptation,” he said.

You huffed, but you kissed his cheek anyway. “Makes me wonder if you learned it from Faust, or if she learned it from you.”

They kissed your cheek in return. You could feel the curve of his smile on your skin. “That’s a mystery we’ll never solve.”

As if she’d been called, you felt Faust’s cool scales glide around your neck and shoulders. Her adorable puppy-mouth pressed against your other cheek, before trying to slip between you and Asra. “Sneak attack!”

“I think she got it from you,” you accused. You grinned at him slyly over Faust’s head, before turning back toward the stove. His arms automatically wrapped around your stomach, chin resting on what free space their familiar left on your shoulder, head tilted to lean against yours. “I woke up wanting rice pudding.”

He hummed by your ear. You were sure his eyes were already slipping shut again. Once, they’d fallen asleep like this. Though to be fair, it had been back at the shop, where less than a foot away was the pile of pillows and cloths used for a bed, so if he fell, they’d have a soft spot to land.

They turned to nuzzle into your neck, warm breaths tickling you. “Spicy or sweet?”

You reached over to grab a small spoon. Well, you reached and fell terribly short. Faust was kind enough to become an extension of your arm and grab it for you. You scooped up a small bit of the pudding and held it up for Asra to taste. They buried their face back into your neck immediately after.

“Sweet. Just like you.”

“Says the cuddle bug clinging to me.”

“Those exist, you know.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. Deep in the South. They live just under the snow, waiting to grab on to anything warm that passes by.”

You stirred the pudding. “Like ticks?”

“Like ticks,” they confirmed. “But instead of sucking your blood” – he squeezed you for emphasis – “they suck up your warmth. Completely harmless. We should go looking for them sometime.”

With a flick of your wrist, the fire went out beneath the small pot. You pressed your elbow back into Asra’s side and he reluctantly let go, stepping away so you were finally free to move around. You grabbed a pair of mismatched bowls and another spoon, and playfully nudged Asra aside with your hip while he grabbed a spoonful from the pot.

With the pudding equally divided between the bowls, and after giving Faust a small lick of what was leftover, you all found yourselves sitting in bed, laying against and on top of one another, watching the plants in the windowsill and the blue sky beyond. Not much needed to be said, but the silence was filled nonetheless with plans for the day ahead, teasing remarks, and sweetened kisses. Later, you’d have to conjure water from sand for the land beast still sleeping outside, and ride on its back back to Vesuvia. Nadia and Portia would want to hear about your travels, Julian would be eager to get his hands on the special leeches you almost got arrested retrieving for him, you had some tasty treats for Muriel to give to Innana–

But for now, you’d bask in the feeling of Asra’s soft hair tickling your forehead as they pull you into their chest. The little dance of his fingers trailing across your hip. That soft look in his eyes. The little sigh he lets out as he presses his lips to your pulse point and feels the shared rhythm in your chests.

Yeah. All the rest can wait.

[xx-thedarklord-xx]

saw your name on the erised particpant post and i'm so excited to read what you wrote! it's like seeing authors in the wild when they do fests and stuff. can't wait

Ahh thank you! I've participated three times in Erised and unfortunately, this year will be my last time for that particular fest, but I am glad you are looking forward to it! There's another fest I participated in as well that will get revealed in the next couple weeks. If you are interested in my past fest fics, I'll link them.

-Dear Cousin, Love Regulus [Harry/Draco Big Bang 2018] As the sole Malfoy heir, Draco understood that his path was set long before his birth; who to be, how to act and what his choices should be. What he had not counted on was the power of outside influences. Letters from his deceased cousin caused him to realize that he did have choices, starting with the choice to be someone else, to be who he wanted to be. The road to self-discovery was difficult and navigating that path in the shadow of Harry Potter was its own challenge but maybe, just maybe, his friends would help him along the way. And he would owe it all to Regulus Black.

-Ardour of Karma [H/D Erised 2019] “Malfoy knows something is going on with you and unless you both want to go back to fighting and death glares, you should fix it.”

“How do I do that? Just waltz up to him and say, ‘I know I’ve been a prat but your scent makes my dick swell. How’s your day?’”

“Mind repeating that?”

The familiar drawl had Harry’s throat clamming up as his blood ran cold. Oh no.

-The Forsaken [Harry/Draco OwlPost 2019] When Draco imagined his future as a child he thought he'd be a Potion Master, get married and maybe have a kid. But the reality was he was a retired Assassin, bitten by a Vampire and mated to a reckless, idiotic, foolish ex-Auror now turned Veela—Harry Potter.

-Borrowing Courage [H/D Erised 2018] After years of being a Magical Artist and painting for other people, Draco decides it’s time to paint for himself for once. The secrets pile up as he tries to unravel the mystery of his relatives but the only thing he didn’t count on was having to go to Potter of all people for approval.

-Save a Horse, Ride a Malfoy [HP Kinkfest 2020] Riddles are woven throughout life, some never answered and many lost in frustration. Whatever riddle it was that defined what Harry and Draco had was a mess of a riddle that worked for them, despite what everyone else thought, even if there was no answer—yet. Sex was another riddle, only that was one they had solved many, many times over. 

-Still Standing [H/D Fan Fair 2019] Not many know the evil origins of a Philosopher's Stone. When Draco discovers that the Goblins found one and kept it, he'll stop at nothing to see it taken care of. Even if that means having to deal with Gringotts' very own resident twat: Harry Potter.

-Augury Forecast [HP Drizzle Fest 2018] Draco had always known that teaching at Hogwarts would be an experience, he just didn’t think that meant a flash flood in the kitchens, a windstorm in the Great Hall, or a sandstorm in the Quidditch pitch. Months of extreme weather would grate on anyone’s nerves, but to have Potter, the ever annoying Divination Professor, around every corner was even worse. So much for a quiet life at Hogwarts.

-Teach Me [HP Contest Fest 2018] "If you can’t learn Occlumency, then you can’t become an Auror.”

No. All of this couldn’t be for nothing. Harry hadn’t spent so much time proving himself, proving that he was more than just a famous name for all of this to go to shite. “This can’t be the end.”

"I have someone in mind that could teach you if you are willing, but I can't guarantee he will help, especially considering your... past." 

"You don't mean Malfoy, do you?"

-Worth Betting On [HP Joggers Fest 2018] The easy way Malfoy breezed into the arena in an unprofessional attire—grey joggers that outlined far too much, and a white dress shirt open with nothing underneath—which showed off his chest, his sweaty sweaty chest—had Harry sitting up straighter. It wasn't unusual to see Malfoy in such a state of undress, it was a signature move that he refused to change.  

Not that Harry wanted him to change. 

 Or the one where Draco is a professional Duelist, and Harry can't stay away from the matches.

[typicalopposite]

Am I just gonna bring yall all drabbles of the many ideas I have now (because I’m currently writing a fic that is getting way bigger than intended) maybe, yeah.

(I had to do research on how to play five card draw for this and it’s likely still inaccurate 🥴 fic writer life, amirite?)

It’s couples game night now that Buck is no longer a solo. Chimney invites Hen and Karen and Maddie invites Buck and Tommy.

After losing an embarrassing amount of times Buck steps in as honorary dealer, and they start another game.

Tommy (who is to Bucks left, cause… yeah research said so) notices that’s it’s very obvious there is something on Chimney’s mind.

“Alright… spit it out, Han…” Tommy finally says.

“So… back then… were you team Jacob?”

Tommy groans and rolls his eyes. Hen laughs. Maddie and Karen look intrigued. Buck wants to know who tf Jacob is.

The game starts and Tommy looks at his cards. Chimney is clearly more invested in the answer than the game. And Tommy throws a dollar into the middle before simply saying, “No.”

There’s another chuckle from around the table. Everyone matches Tommy’s hand, cards are tossed , and Buck gives out new ones. “So team Edward then,” Chimney says, and Buck tosses the card he was giving Hen so fast it bypasses her hand a hits her in the chest.

“Oh… s-sorry,” he says , although this eyes are still glued to Tommy.

Again he looks at his cards, sighs, tosses another dollar. “No,” he repeats. “Although I was on his side more than Jacob’s.”

Buck is so confused he is about to rip his hair out, and everyone nodding in agreement is only making it worse. Everyone matches Tommy again and Buck gives them new cards.

Chimney opens his mouth and Tommy intercepts with, “not Emmett either.” Chimney snaps his mouth closed.

When Tommy ups the bet to $20 Hen and Karen look at their cards and both fold. “Ahh I know,” Chimney says as he absentmindedly tosses a twenty into the pile, and Maddie tosses her cards, bowing out as well. “Jasper.” Tommy’s face answers for him. “Carlisle?”

“Who are these people?!” Buck snaps, unable to keep himself composed any longer. He isn’t sure if he is more confused or jealous… or maybe it’s an equal amount of both.

Tommy smirks but doesn’t respond. He looks at his cards and seems satisfied with them, so he glances up at Chimney and cocks an eyebrow, waiting for him to make a decision. Buck doesn’t think he has gave Chimney any new cards the whole game, the latter being far too focused on asking Tommy about a bunch of random men than paying attention to his cards.

When Chimney doesn’t even look at his hand Tommy pulls out a hundred dollar bill and gently (sassily) places it in the pile. And Maddie is glaring at Chimney like she dares him to try to match it. “Alright, alright! I’m out.”

Tommy chuckles and sits back in his seat. Everyone is staring at him like they are waiting for an answer to this mystery. “If you must know,” he says with a shrug. “It was always Charlie for me.”

Buck feels the gears turning in his brain and as if the wires finally connect he gasps, “Are you talking about twilight?!”

“Obviously,” Chimney answers. “Wh— Wait. How did you get that from Charlie? He’s not even a main character!”

“Because Maddie had a shirt that said Team Charlie on it. She had like, the biggest crush on him.”

Maddie shrugs, “What can I say, there’s nothing hotter than a guy in uniform,” she says and promptly kisses Chimney on the cheek.

“Ain’t that the truth,” Tommy agrees, flashing that big cheesy grin at Buck. Maddie giggles as she reaches past a thoroughly confused Chimney and Buck to high-five him.

“Well… at least I didn’t fold with an amazing hand,” Chimney says and lays his cards down, with a three of a kind in 8’s.

“Better than mine,” Tommy laughs, and lays down his hand. A two of spades, three of diamonds, five of clubs, seven of hearts and a nine of diamonds. Then he gathers the bills from the middle, ignoring Chimney’s look of disbelief, and sets the stack in front of him. “Put it towards the honeymoon,” he says, pushing back from the table and putting his jacket on. “I insist,” he adds before Maddie can argue.

(I’m going to stop it there because this got way longer and much more actual ficlet-y than I intended! I will likely actually write this… eventually 👀 but now it’s at least mostly out of my system!)

[remyfire]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

I was tagged by @quordleona03! Thank you so much for the tag I know lots of people have already been tagged, so consider this a formal request that if you have NOT been tagged, you please come play! But off the top of my head, @onekisstotakewithme @cuddleswinchester @dreamingofspring :D

How many works do you have on Ao3?

40.

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

I think we might officially be leaving 2023 with 300,842 words. Not a bad count for only publishing since April! That's a novella a month right there.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

MASH. :D

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Scratching The Itch, Can't Take My Eyes Off You, To Have and To Hold, Anything You Say Can and Will Be Held Against You, and Tear Out All Your Tenderness. Good morning beejhawk nation I see you all hkdfds

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! Sometimes they pile up and I get overwhelmed and just click that "Mark All As Read" button while hiding behind my hand. But I really try to circle through nowadays even just for a "Thanks for reading!!" because I really appreciate every single one!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I feel like ...With Too Many Miles Between Us was a pretty rough one. There's maybe optimism that you can read through the cracks, but it was a damn agonizing prompt fill (affectionate) all around. The Good Ones Always Seem to Break is another. Sorry that I keep putting you in situations, Beej.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oughhhh, just about anything that suggests they don't end here, so to speak. I think To Have and To Hold probably tops the list, but I Intend to Hold You For the Longest Time and Soft Place to Land also come in hot just by nature of being established postwar situations.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet! I've had a couple of people not understand what I was going for and who were not afraid of saying so, but it wasn't outright hate. They were probably just not the intended audience.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Ahh yes. 65% of my current fics are rated E for a reason, and the 5 M ones are flirting with that line.

I categorize myself as an erotic romance writer, meaning that typically if you remove my sex scenes from my fics, you are losing integral information or character/relationship development that would otherwise make the fic not stand on its own. I also have a handful that are just pure erotica—sex for titillation's sake rather than development. I adore writing smut!! It's a lot of fun, it's exciting when you know you've landed it exactly like you wanted to, and it's a way for me to reclaim all those years I spent being forcibly repressed due to my religious upbringing. I love every minute of it.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I do not!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

The Famous 4077 Dog Tag Party certainly counts! Many of us authors randomized a list of pairings for both eras of the show, and then we were responsible for picking a pairing, writing the characters going on a date (platonic or romantic), and seeing what happened. Extremely fun way to get some rare pairs we might not have expected. For example, I got to write Margie/Klinger for it!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Hey now I am too fucking polyam to answer this and you know it. Mcpunnihawk probably tops the list, warring with margbeej and sidbeejhawk.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I am not taking this defeatist energy into 2024, how dare you. One day, my pretties, I'm coming back for all of you and we are crossing that finish line OR ELSE.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Smut, capturing character voices accurately, physicality, spinning relational scenarios on the fly.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Genres like mystery or sci-fi or horror, repetition of comfort words/phrases, putting my characters through significant levels of pain (I am too empathetic, I can and will cry over my own fics).

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Things that I do not feel comfortable doing myself because I am not familiar enough with any other language to know I'm doing it accurately.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The kid wizard one.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

How dare you make me pick from my children. Scratching The Itch, Anything You Say Can and Will Be Held Against You, I'd Give Up Forever to Touch You, and Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures. Notably this could all change by this time tomorrow. I'm very fond of my fics.

[mothiidae]

my MDA:Rain Code thoughts - spoiler free version

I've been meaning to thought dump my overall thoughts and opinions about rain code for a while and well,, here we are!

my overall opinions: Despite some issues, Rain Code acts as a great foundation that can be built upon in the future - along with plot threads that can be used in future games. If your a danganronpa fan I would totally recommend it, but its a bit of a harder sell to those outside the bubble.

I have already done another form of this kinda post with everything i deemed to be somewhat spoilery - whether that be full on plot twists and story events in specific chapters or simple side content. For anyone who wants to read the spoiler version i'll link it here!

onto the list!:

to try to keep to some order, i've orginised the points into gameplay/mechanics, story and characters

Masafumi Takada was let out of the basement and has made yet another banging ost, is there no stop to this man? The title theme RAINCODE?? HELLO?? what i liked was that there are moments in which you can hear dangan elements; such as during the investigation theme you can hear trumpets which personally reminded me of sdr2's investigation theme and bella fresco grand finale - shinigami's execution theme - there are parts that sound like the execution theme. Despite all these dangan references (which im sure there are more) Raincode has been able to carve out its own vibe musically and im all here for this more low-key, lo-fi kinda feel!

Rui Komatsuzaki is back and the characters have that distinct design flair and eccentricity i expect from him. I have to say his designs are partly what drew me into Raincode because, well,,, his style is so recognisable!! it also is somewhat nostalgic for me so my neurons activate when i see it. I am but a simple man that enjoys this rui style.

Personally, Kodaka defiantly did not utilise this being a 3D adventure game enough because at points it just felt like visual novel taking place within a 3D space. And the adventure part i believe is quite the misnomer - it can be super restrictive in its exploration, theres not much to do/see within the city itself other than the requests - which are more of a story than gameplay thing. Though the adventure/action descriptors for the game are for the mystery labyrinth, it can make kanai ward itself feel more like a vehicle (gameplay wise) to get you from one case to the next. Kanai ward is stunning though, with kamasaki district being my favourite part!!

I also found that the mystery labyrinths got boring at inbetween all the minigames - consisting of running to the next part whilst the characters discus the case. In danganronpa, these moments of discussion were unnoticeable due to being a visual novel but within a 3D action/adventure-esque game like Rain Code they don't work.

Being outside of the killing game formula with supernatural abilities, Kodaka has been able to do some really interesting things with cases. If there are future games i'm curious if he'll set up a pattern of cases like in danganronpa.

I DID NOT EXPECT ALOT OF THE PLOT TWISTS, one of which only works well if you've played danganronpa in my opinion. Another one didn't have build up, but i can't tell if its a im just dense thing or a it was just a shit twist thing

Quirky ahh characters my beloved - most major characters stood out and had their moments. They join the Kodaka pile of eccenticity

I am a HUGE Yomi stannie, he is delightfully evil and his VA was going absolutely ham. shout out to Howard Wang! He is evil and there is no changing him and i love him for it!

other than him and martina i found the peacekeepers to be a little disappointing. They did what they were needed to but most are susceptible to leaving little impression on people. Which is not good as they are your major obstacle in a chapter. the majority of them have under 30~ mins of screen time [that is a rough estimate, most likely im wildly wrong] though they didn't need to have backstories or anything, them being a constant presence through investigation might've helped.

YAKOU MY LOVE <3<3<3<3<3<3 he is a soggy, wet cat of a character and sooooo pathetic!!! my kinda guy

Now i like fubuki as much as the next guy but i found that she would go one of the funniest characters of the cast to

[chronicallybloodless]

Heavy to Hold - Chapter 15

Jealousy

Pairing: Astarion x enby!tav Status: in progress Rating: Explicit (18+ only) Genre: angst/comfort | slow burn Alternating second-person POV Contains spoilers for the whole game basically TW: it's an astarion fic: descriptions of trauma, abuse, sexual violence, etc. | smut | full tag list on AO3 Read from the beginning: AO3 | Tumblr Listen to the Playlist

You were leaning against the wall by the door while Shadowheart knelt and attempted to meditate. Karlach’s discomfort was interrupting her efforts, as well as distracting you from listening in on what was happening in the closed chamber. It had been silent for a while. It made you uneasy, not knowing what was going on.

Read on AO3

Read on Tumblr ↓

Astarion's POV

“Ahhh, the smell of debauchery in the air.” You threw your arms wide with a dramatic flourish as you took in the scene of the goblin camp. The air was thick with with the smell of blood, no doubt belonging to some unfortunate captives.

“It’s not quite a hells party but it is certainly something.” Karlach muttered, stepping carefully around a mysterious pile of…..well, something, that was lying on the floor.

“Don’t tell me this is your kind of party, Astarion?” Shadowheart questioned with a bemused smirk.

“Well….it does lack a certain glamour.” You frowned as you noticed that the same substance was coating most of the floor around you. “But a handful of drunken Baldurian Patriars wouldn’t be too out of place here.”

Environments like these were easy hunting grounds for vampires. People coming in and out, more entrances that could be watched, an abundance of noise and booze, and dim candlelight. You were always pleased when you stumbled upon such as scene, as you were practically guaranteed to find a victim to take back to Cazador with almost no effort required, meaning you could actually spend your time enjoying the party.

Sadly, this goblin soiree did not seem to be the kind of gathering that would have a selection of wines that met your standards.

Shadowheart was about to respond to you with a snide comment, but a blood-curdling scream rose over the cacophony of the grand hall, setting your group on alert.

“Is someone being tortured?” Karlach looked around, trying to find where the noise had come from. She changed off, leaving the other three of you to scurry after her.

When you caught up with her, she was peeking into an open doorway.

“Shhhh….there’s some kind of torture chamber in here.” She whispered as the group huddled in the shadows. “We have to rescue whoever they have in here, they may have seen our druid.”

Just then, a young human stumbled out of the room with a dazed look on his face.

“Karlach, I don’t think it’s—” Tav tried to interject as Karlach grabbed the man by the collar.

“What? Is this part of it? I thought it was over once I said pumpernickle?” The man protested.

“Now now, if you want a turn, all you have to do is ask.” A slender man wearing a dramatic collared outfit was standing in the doorway. His body was covered in scars of all sizes, as well as fresh blood.

Karlach released her hold on the man and turned to the man in the doorway.

“Are you more faithful who have come to beg penance from the Maiden of Pain?”

“Maiden of Pain….” Shadowheart folded her arms as she examined the man. “Are you a Loviatan?”

“Ahh, you know her? Splendid! That does save me my usual explanation.” He sighed and shook his head. “I was asked here to help assist these goblins with their techniques, but they do not seem to grasp the complexity of Loviatar’s rituals.”

“With what techniques?” You asked. Between the blood, the table full of strange instruments, and the shackles on the wall, you had a feeling you knew.

“Torture.” Shadowheart said flatly. “Loviatar only answers prayers offered to her in blood.”

“Torture is such an ugly word for it.” The man waved his hand dismissively. “Loviatar is the goddess of pain, in all of its exquisite forms. She may not particularly care if her penance is doled out to….reluctant…worshippers, but in my experience as a priest, I’ve found that the most beautiful prayers come from the lips of those who truly enjoy their penance.” The priest smirked as he pressed a hand to his chest and gave small bow for dramatic effect. “My name is Abdirak. I haven’t seen many non-goblins during my time here. You are a welcome respite from their primitive approach to pain.”

“I’m sorry, are we ranking types of pain now?” Karlach frowned in displeasure.

“Oh, now that sounds like fun.” You looked over the priest again. His striking eyes shone in the darkness as the candlelight danced over his scarred skin. His priest robes combined a loose flowing skirt with an angular, pointed collar, leaving his chest exposed. You watched his lean muscles tense and relax as he shifted his weight from side to side.

You had received your fair share of harsh treatment in your time with Cazador, though it was usually at the hands—well, finger bones—of Cazador’s enchanted skeleton “kennel keeper,” Godey. Cazador also had his own private torture chamber in the attic, which is where you would end up if you did something especially egregious, or if he was bored that day. Regardless, it was always a miserable experience, intended to make you more complacent.

That treatment was of course not reserved for just you—your siblings were also subject to the same cruelties. As your numbers grew over the years, Godey sometimes struggled to keep up with all of you, which is when he had suggested to Cazador that you would have to learn how to torture yourselves if more than two of you needed to be punished at a time. Cazador of course loved the idea, and had soon introduced both compelled self-torture and torture of your fellow spawn as common activities.

After a few decades, you had become quite good at it. Worse, you had started to enjoy it. As one of the older spawn, you had frequent opportunities to “discipline” your younger siblings as they learned Cazador’s rules. You had figured out what made each of them most uncomfortable through trial and error, but it got to the point where “Perhaps I should get Astarion to take you to the kennel” was a feared enough sentence that they would volunteer to torture themselves instead. Pity, as that did take away one of your only hobbies.

As for your “self-torture,” you learned quickly that it was in your best interest to find something that looked enough like torture and really play up your performance so that Cazador wouldn’t compel you to do something worse. Chaining yourself up under a chandelier and having the candles slowly melt onto you was one of your favorites; just painful enough to count, and drawn out over a few days so you got some rest. Going without meals was the harder part, not that you were terribly upset at skipping a few days of rat. Your siblings hated that you got away with it, but you performed your screams and agony so well that Cazador allowed it to go on.

“How refreshing it is to be in the company of those who understand the value of Loviatar’s Love.” Abdirak sighed. “I must admit, it has been too long since I offered a proper penance of my own. There’s a shortage qualified individuals around here, and I’ve always found that penance is more effective under proper supervision.” He had a mischievous smirk on his face as he spoke.

And then you noticed that he was eyeing Tav.

“Tell me, if one of us helped you with this…penance.” Shadowheart questioned. “Would you be willing to tell us more about the cultists here?”

“Oh, I do love a good torture for information.” You offered. It had been a while since you had made anyone scream slowly, and all the better if it meant Tav wouldn’t be involved. You couldn’t imagine them being comfortable doing something like that.

“An intriguing offer.” Abdirak placed his hand on his chin thoughtfully. “I think if I were able to give and receive penance, I would have some time left over to discuss the cult.”

“And just who do you think needs to receive penance?” You were infinitely less interested in being on the receiving end of any punishment, no matter how handsome he was. Still, you had gotten quite used to pain, and could probably endure whatever it was easier than the others.

“I believe I could handle both roles.” Tav offered. You turned to look at them, but Abdirak was already leading them into his chambers.

“Now wait just a moment.” You protested. “What exactly are you going to be doing with them?”

“That will be up to the Maiden of Pain to decide.” The priest smirked at you as he closed the door in your face.

“I don’t get it.” Karlach was pacing anxiously up and down the hallway. “Why would Tav volunteer to be tortured?

You were leaning against the wall by the door while Shadowheart knelt and attempted to meditate. Karlach’s discomfort was interrupting her efforts, as well as distracting you from listening in on what was happening in the closed chamber. It had been silent for a while. It made you uneasy, not knowing what was going on.

And then you heard the distinct crack of a whip. A moan followed, but you couldn’t tell whose.

Another crack, followed by another moan, louder this time. It was Abdirak’s voice. You breathed a sigh of relief.

You tried to imagine what Tav would look like wielding a whip. It seemed so…unlike them. They were far better suited to instruments and delicate rapiers, moving with grace and control, their fingers crackling with magic that reflected in their eyes like sparks. A whip was so much more….brutal. Tav was radiance and energy, not ripping and tearing. They almost never drew blood on the battlefield. After all, that was your job.

You heard Abdirak begging for mercy, pleading that he could take no more. It was followed by another crack of the whip.

Perhaps there was more to Tav than you knew.

The chamber fell silent after that. You heard the muffled sounds of talking but couldn’t make out the words through the heavy wooden door.

“Um….what are you doing?” Shadowheart was looking up at you with a judgmental look on her face. You realized that you were leaning conspicuously towards the door. She knew full well that you were listening in, but she wanted the satisfaction of making you say it aloud.

“I’m trying to make sure our dearest leader isn’t being harmed.” You huffed.

“I think Tav can more than handle themselves.” She smirked. “Besides, that priest has information we need.”

“Yes but….”

“Maybe Tav can talk him into joining us.”

“Why the devil would they do a thing like that?”

“Oh, I don’t know. They seemed pretty keen to go and enjoy this penance. Perhaps they would want to make it a regular practice.” The look on her face told you that she knew about your late-night encounters with Tav. You weren’t sure what business it was of hers, much less why she would try to get under your skin about it like this.

You were trying to come up with a response when you heard another moan through the door.

It was the same sound you heard each time you fed, an intoxicating mix of pain and pleasure.

It was Tav.

You turned your attention back to the door, gesturing to Shadowheart and Karlach to keep quiet. You could hear Abdirak encouraging them to be louder.

And they obliged.

You froze, transfixed by the sound of their voice echoing off the stone walls of the chamber as their cries grew louder. Your mind raced, trying to decipher what he was doing to them for them to sound like that. In all your late-night imaginings, you never came close to how beautiful they sounded now, when they weren’t trying to muffle their sounds of pleasure.

It pained you that you weren’t the one making them sound like that. You thought about the marks you left on them each night and the pride you felt when you admired your handiwork. You thought about the knowing looks you got from Tav in front of the others every time they crossed their legs, being careful to keep the marks hidden—a look that seemed to say “This is just between us.”

You couldn’t help but feel possessive about them, given everything that had happened between the two of you. From the moment you first met them on the beach and saw the bruises on their neck, you never wanted anyone to leave a mark on them except you. The way they gave themselves to you each night to sate your hunger only made those feelings stronger.

And now someone else was touching them, doing gods know what to make them scream in ecstasy, making them bleed.

Your stomach turned as a terrible thought crossed your mind. Were they only allowing you to drink from them because they got off on pain? Did they care about you at all?

The sounds they were making made it clear that they were enjoying their penance. You felt disgusted with yourself, thinking that Tav may have just been using you physically.

You heard Abdirak praising them for their screams, asking them to let go and submit to the pain. Their moans intensified, the sound intertwining with the snap of leather on skin.

“Astarion!”

Your eyes widened as Tav screamed your name between moans of pleasure. They sounded like they had come completely undone.

You sincerely hoped that Shadowheart and Karlach hadn’t heard any of it, but the bemused expression on Shadowheart’s face suggested that you weren’t that lucky.

You stood there in silence, unsure of what to do next. The sounds in the room had lowered back to quiet murmurs. Shadowheart was barely containing her glee at your discomfort. Karlach looked like she was ready to break down the door.

“Should we um…..Should we just go get them?” Your question was met with a shoulder shrug and an enthusiastic nod from your companions. You steeled yourself and opened the door.

“Oh, Astarion!” Tav turned to look at you as you entered the room. They were stripped to their undergarments, seated in Abdirak’s lap as he stroked their hair. He was similarly undressed. You wanted to scream, but managed to restrain it to a pained grunt. “Did you need something?”

“Perhaps your companions are ready to go rescue your druid from the dungeon?” The priest questioned. It seemed that Tav had managed to get the information you needed.

You looked around the room, taking in the scene. The whip you heard earlier had been carefully wrapped up and placed on the table along with a quite frankly astonishing array of equipment. You had trouble believing that the sounds you heard were solely the result of the riding crop that was lying on the floor near them given all the options that were at hand. You were relieved that none of it seemed to have Tav’s blood on it. You were less relieved that Tav didn’t seem to be in any kind of hurry to get out of Abdirak’s lap.

“Yes, well, we do need to be seeing to that druid.” You huffed, folding your arms impatiently.

“Have you sufficiently internalized your penance, dear one?” Abdirak asked Tav. There was a softness in his eyes and movements that made your chest tighten. Nothing about how he was interacting with Tav now suggested that either of them had been penitent in the slightest. They looked….loving. Comfortable. Safe.

You didn’t understand why anyone would cling to someone who had just harmed them, even if the experience was pleasurable for them. You knew first hand that pain could be pleasurable, but you understood that as something your body did to protect you, turning something excruciating into pleasure for your own sake. To seek it out voluntarily—and to respond with such gentleness to the person who hurt you—was so far removed from your own experiences. You had always been left alone to tend your own wounds and nurse your hatred of those who had wronged you, just as you had done to your siblings when it was your turn to inflict pain.

Why would they want to stay with someone who hurt them?

Why did they call my name if they are so comfortable with him?

Tav slowly stood and offered a hand to Abdirak. He stood and gave their hand a gracious kiss before releasing it from his. Tav was practically glowing as they walked towards you.

“All done?” You tried to speak without making your feelings obvious, but the hurt was there.

“Yep!” They grabbed their clothes from a nearby stool and began dressing. “Though from what Abdirak told me, we’re pretty much going to have to kill everyone in here to get the druid out.”

“Pity. Shall we start our cleanup in here then?” You said flatly. Tav giggled, assuming you were making a joke.

“I’ll be out of your way by the time you reach the dungeon.” The priest began dressing as well, though his outfit didn’t cover the fresh welts on his back.

Tav threw their arms around his shoulders. “Take care, Abdirak.”

“You as well. If I’m ever in Baldur’s Gate, I’ll be sure to pay you a visit at the temple of Sharess.”

You raised an eyebrow. You had trouble believing that they would have told him about the brothel, considering how secretive they were about their work.

“Ready?” Tav asked. You had a million questions running through your mind.

Why are you being so nice to him? What did he do to you? Can I kill him? Did you tell him about Sharess’ Caress or does he think you work at an actual temple? Why did you scream my name when it was him touching you? What do you want from me?

“Of course. Let’s go spill some blood.”

[wholesomemorbid]

No Dead Bodies

A Descentverse Comic

The comic above is in dramatic monochrome with crosshatching. The simplistic figures are cartoonily expressive, though sometimes they look sort of dramatic like some Dick Tracy noir stuff is going on.

The description for this comic, in drabble form:

"Cesar!"

A mysterious tall man in a black suit turns at the sound of his voice. Cesar is at a crime scene with Agent Suzy, who watches him with folded arms and a smirk.

"You coming or what?" she asks. Behind her, crime scene tape and a pentagram.

"I like it over here," says Cesar.

"Too bad your job is over there," says Suzy. "By the DEAD BODIES."

There is a pile of body parts on the ground some distance from the pentagram and altar at its center. Once Cesar notices the detached head, he gets nauseous and *hurks* into his fist to avoid barfing.

His inner monologue says: "My name is Cesar Hawke. I work for the government. I do magic stuff for the Office of Preternatural Affairs. I can analyze rituals until the familiars come home. Other parts are...harder."

The severed foot is twitching. Suzy tries to drag Cesar toward the crime scene, so they don't notice at first.

"The boss promised I wouldn't see dead bodies," says Cesar while the body parts come together on the ground, reassembling. "This must be the 500th."

Suzy says, "You know what they say. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me 500 times, and I'm an idiot who should accept the reality of my job."

The headless body is getting off the ground.

"A promise is a promise Suze," says Cesar as the body reattaches its head. There's a little squish. Cesar starts to sneeze. "Ahh...ahhhhh... Achoo~!" He sneezes into his hand. Gross, Cesar! Use your sleeve!

Suzy is concerned about something else. "Uh oh. Is that allergy-allergy or magic-allergy?"

Cesar remains oblivious to the body standing up. "Ragweed IS bad this year..."

"Yeah but no," says Suzy. She finally noticed the zombie. She draws her gun. "It's a zombie."

She aims and fires. BANG POW BANG BANG

Cesar covers his ears. Eek!

The body pops off into its component pieces again and crumbles onto the ground.

"Ah shucks someone is raising zombies," Cesar says, worrying.

"Look on the bright side," says Suzy. "Zombies are undead. You wanted NO DEAD BODIES." Behind her, the candles around the circle of magic extinguish. Smoke spirals into the air.

~

If this comic scratched some goofy noir itch, please consider following me. 1 heart = 1 zombie put back to rest

[aeoki]

Grand Slam - The School’s Ghost Stories: Chapter 6

Location: Yumenosaki Classroom (Evening) Characters: Yuuta, Subaru, Makoto, Sora, Mayoi & Hitsugi

Hitsugi: Okay, I’ll explain the details of the project then.

“Broadcasting Accidents” is, in other words, an occult show. Its main focus will be the Seven Mysteries of Yumenosaki and we’ll be investigating a variety of unnatural phenomena.

Makoto: So it’s like those psychic specials on TV, right?

Hitsugi: Oh, you probably shouldn’t think of it as something so grand like a TV show.

It’ll be filmed within the school and we don’t really have a budget, so it’ll probably end up being something like an amateur video on the internet.

Most of the budget went into paying for everyone’s appearance fees, anyway.

Subaru: You got a budget even though it’s a job within the school?

Hitsugi: It seems there’s been an order from the higher-ups stating that jobs within the school should also be paid in “L$”... It looks like Yumenosaki is already a subcontractor with ES.

Besides, it’s not like I’m complaining to you guys but I didn’t expect so many people to show up to my amateur project.

I suppose my plan of just setting up a high reward and gathering participants in the meantime backfired on me.

I didn’t really specify any conditions to take part so I’m in a pickle because too many people applied. Sniffle sniffle.

Makoto: That’s all thanks to Anzu-chan – I mean, all because of her, right?

There are a lot of idols at Yumenosaki who want to take part in her projects no matter what they may be, after all.

Hitsugi: It appears so… Well, I’m grateful for it and it’s better than having no one show up.

I’ve just been cancelled last minute by the people I asked to make an appearance and they left like migrating birds.

Makoto: So they’ve jumped ship, huh. …Who cancelled last minute? What was their reason?

Hitsugi: Umm, they’re Tomoya Mashiro from “Ra*bits” and Aira Shiratori from “ALKALOID”. They both apparently saw the second of the Seven Mysteries, “The Blood-Vomiting Beast”, with their own eyes.

The original outline of the programme was supposed to be, “The idols who saw the strange thing with their own eyes close in on the truth…”

Subaru: Really? They don’t seem like the people to cancel last minute, though. Well, I don’t really know what Aira’s like yet.

Hitsugi: Oh, I worded that weirdly.

Maybe “The Blood-Vomiting Beast” was too much of a shock for them, but it seems they both fell ill.

I don’t think they cancelled because they didn’t like me or the project.

Makoto: Fell ill, huh. I can see that happening with Shiratori. “ALKALOID” was going through a lot during the summer holidays, so his exhaustion must have piled up.

But it’s kinda unexpected to hear Mashiro-kun being sick. He experenced a lot of awful things last year and he’s a tough kid who would bounce back to his usual cheerful self even after collapsing.

Subaru: Ahh~ He would collapse quite frequently, huh. Shinonon would cry and tell me about it over the phone so I knew that about hime.

I’m not a god nor a doctor, so I don’t know what to do even if he comes crying to me, though.

But well, I think just having someone listen can help a lot.

Makoto: You’re a proper “senpai” when it comes to Shino-kun, huh, Akehoshi-kun~

Subaru: What? I treat everyone like that.

After Chii~chan-senpai graduated, Takamin was pretty sad so I started greeting him with “Ossu, ossu” every time I see him in the corridor!

Makoto: Yeah, I bet Takamine-kun hates that.

Yuuta: Umm~... Are you guys just going to keep talking about random stuff?

Hitsugi: Oh, sorry! I should be doing my job! Sorry, I’m still not used to things!

Yuuta: It’s fine~ Yumenosaki is more or less like this anyway.

Makoto: I don’t think that’s quite right.

Yuuta: Yeah. …Anyway, I couldn’t get a word in earlier but isn’t Sora-kun acting kinda weirdly?

Sora: …………

Subaru: Hmm? What’s up, Yellow Kid? Why is he just staring at a spot even though there’s nothing there…

Yuuta: Who knows? Maybe he sees a ghost or something?

Hitsugi: What, an unnatural phenomenon has appeared already!? Whaa, we’ve only just started discussing the project so I didn’t bring a camera!

Sora: Hm~? It’s not a ghost~...

But Sora can see a weird “colour” over there.

Yuuta: Say what? That’s so scary! I don’t get what’s going on but that’s creepy!

Sora: It’s okay~ It’s not a bad “colour” at all ♪

Mayoi: U-Umm, I’m sorry.

I-I’m definitely not suspicious.

Hitsugi: That sounds like…

Makoto: Hm? Is that Ayase-kun? From “ALKALOID”?

Subaru: Ohh~... I’ve seen someone sleeping in a coffin, someone floating in a fountain and someone flying in a hot air balloon, but I’ve never seen someone hiding above the ceiling before.

Yuuta: Why’re you up there, Senpai~?

Makoto: Ahh, everyone’s reactions are weak because they’re used to the weird antics from the “Five Oddballs”!? Isn’t that bad if we’re supposed to be filming an occult programme?

Hitsugi: We haven’t started filming yet so it’s fine! As long as you guys know how to react during the real thing!

Subaru: Anyway, what’re you doing up there, Aya-chan~?

Mayoi: Aya-chan!? Um, Aira-san asked me to do this…!

It seems he felt he left a bad impression for cancelling last minute and asked if I could participate in his place instead…!

He said, “You’ll be perfect because you look like you like stuff like the occult.”, and pleaded with such a cute look…! I-I couldn’t say no to that…!

But there were so many people I don’t know and I couldn’t bring myself to appear, so I hid up here the entire time! I’m so sorrryyy!

Makoto: A-A weird one, I see.

Yuuta: Well, I think he’s perfect for an idol. He really stands out.

Subaru: I think so too. …Hmm, it’ll just hurt your throat to talk all the way up there, so why don’t you come down~?

Mayoi: Alrighttt… I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

Everyone, please stand back. I’ll jump down now.

Hitsugi: …………

Mayoi: ? Um, is there someone you wish to say to me?

Hitsugi: …No, nothing.

Anyway, is everyone here okay with being the participants in the project? It’s gotten a bit messy but let’s start talking about the serious stuff now!

← Previous Chapter ᠂ ⚘ ˚⊹˚ ⚘ ᠂  Next Chapter →

[usabun-tl]

Lemon・誘爆街 (Secondary Explosion Neighborhood) — appy

English+Romaji Translation

下らないこと���言って、ダーリン

kudaranai koto wo itte daarin

Talk to me about trivial things, darling

気が済むまでさあ、隣で

ki ga sumu made saa tonari de

Until you're content, I'll be next to you

僕、きみのことを分かってないかも知れない

boku kimi no koto wo wakattenai kamo shirenai

I probably don't know all that much about you

打算や皮肉を止めて

dasan ya hiniku wo tomete

I put a pause on my selfishness and cynicism,

思い返す度に檸檬の香りがして

omoi kaesu tabi ni remon no kaori ga shite

Whenever I think back, i smell the scent of lemons

忘れた日々に馳せる

wasureta hibi ni hanaseru

Dwelling on days forgotten

過去のことを歌う あの頃の僕ら

kako no koto wo utau ano koro no bokura

I'll sing about the past, of us from back then

気詰まりな街を粉葉みじんに

kizumari na machi wo ko ha mijin ni

So this uncomfortable town turned to dust,

爆破して回っていたっけ

bakuha shite mawatteitakke

I remember I went around, setting off explosions

どうも気に入らない相に容れない

doumo ki ni iranai ai ni irenai

No matter how hard I try I can't stand it, we can't get along

そういう感情をそこに描いてた

souiu kanjou wo soko ni kaite

Drawing pictures of those sort of feelings there

だ楽しいだけだった

tada tanoshii dake datta

It was fun, simply

つまらないことを言って僕を笑わせるなよ

tsumaranai koto wo itte boku wo warawaseruna yo

Don't make me laugh talking about boring things

いつかきっと本当に終わりがくるから

itsuka kitto hontou ni owari ga kuru kara

The end really will come someday

下らないことを言って、ダーリン

kudaranai koto wo itte daarin

So talk to me about trivial things, darling

気が済むまでさぁ、隣で泡沫の夢をずっと

ki ga sumu made saa tonari de utakata no yume wo zutto

Unitil you're content, I'll always be next to you having transient dreams

馬鹿みたいにきみを待つ夜は眠れない

baka mitai ni kimi wo matsu yoru wa nemurenai

The nights I wait for you I can't sleep, like an idiot

だから此処はおやすみ

dakara koko wa oyasumi

So I'll say good night here

同じ景色でも違って見える僕は

onaji keshiki demo chigatte mieru boku wa

We're in front of the same scenery, but I see it differently

きみに世界を見てる

kimi ni sekai wo miteru

I see the world in you

謎を解こうとしたあの頃の僕ら

nazo wo toko kou toshita ano koro no bokura

I tried to solve the mystery, of us from back then

色彩をゴチャゴチャに積みあげて

shikisai wo gochagocha ni tsumu agete

Messily piling up all of those hues

他は全部後に回した

hoka wa zenbu ato ni mawashita

I put off everything else until it was done

元気でいるなら、大丈夫なら

genki de iru nara daijoubu nara

As long as you're doing well, as long as you're okay,

心配無いもっと上手くやれるよ

shinpai nai motto jouzuku yareru yo

You don't have to worry, things will get better

哀しさを分け合った

kanashisa wo wake atta

The sadness we shared

何も無い世界でもきみを愛したいけど

nanimo nai sekai demo kimi wo aishitai kedo

In this world where there is nothing, I want to love you, but

不意に立ち上がって居た堪れないのは

fui ni tachi agatte itata marenai no wa

I suddenly can't stand to take it any longer

つまりはこの重さなんだ

tsumari wa kono omosa nanda

I mean, the weight of it all

一秒経ってさあ、未来へと

ichibyou tatte saa mirai he to

A second passed, heading towards the future

嗚呼 また今、頭を回して遠ざかる

aa mata ima atama wo mawashite toozakaru

Ahh, my head is spinning and my consciousness is fading out again

でもまた会えるから、寂しくないよ

demo mata aeru kara sabishikunai yo

But I know we'll be able to meet again, so I'm not lonely

つまらないことを言って僕を笑わせるなよ

tsumaranai koto wo itte boku wo warawaseruna yo

Don't make me laugh talking about boring things

いつかきっと本当に終わりがくるから

itsuka kitto hontou ni owari ga kuru kara

The end really will come someday

下らないことを言って、ダーリン

kudaranai koto wo itte daarin

So talk to me about trivial things, darling

気が済むまでさぁ、隣で

wo ki ga sumu made saa tonari de

Unitil you're content, I'll be next to you



何も無い世界でもきみを愛したいけど

nanimo nai sekai demo kimi wo aishitai kedo

In this world where there is nothing, I want to love you, but

不意に立ち上がって居た堪れないのは

fui ni tachi agatte itata marenai no wa

I suddenly can't stand to take it any longer

つまりはこの重さなんだ

tsumari wa kono omosa nanda

I mean, the weight of it all

一秒経ってさあ、未来へと

ichi byou tatte saa mirai he to

A second passed, heading towards the future

ーー煙る背後を背負ってーー

kemuru haigo wo seoru tte

Carrying the smoke on my back

ルルル.......

rururu...

ルルル.......

rururu...

[gamma-gal-24]

BIG ASK : could we see ALL the f/ovember prompts with hans??? 👀

OH GOODNESS HI HI HI!!👋😁👋 THIS IS A BIG ASK!! AHH, I'M SO EXCITED! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!

Now, I'll let Hans take it away from here!☺💞💕💞

--------------------------

🍂- "What fall beverage is your go-to to share with s/i?"

"So, normally Juni doesn't much care for tea, but when she realized that I liked to have some on the colder days, we began experimenting around with different flavors and added sweets until we found a tea we could both enjoy! It turns out, a cinnamon black tea and a-uh... generous drop of cream was a good fit!

🦃- "Do you and s/i cook for Thanksgiving? Who makes what?"

"Seeing that Juni and I are both royalty, the cooks and chefs pretty well cover Thanksgiving meals! But that doesn't stop her from sneaking into the kitchen and baking pies for the staff just for fun. It's her own little way of thanking them for their hard work, and I couldn't find it sweeter.💕

(Scarf)- "Do you enjoy getting all bundled up when the weather starts to cool? Do you steal s/i's scarves or coats to wear?"

"I assure you I don't steal her clothes. Haha, she's offered to loan me her coat a time or two when I, for some reason, didn't have one- buuuut I really don't FIT in Juni's clothes... Nor do I think pink and green florals suit me."

"But yes, I do enjoy bundling up."☺

🍁- "Do you and s/i enjoy making piles of fallen leaves and jumping in them? Would you ever do that?"

"Oh, I haven't done that since I was a kid! I bet Juni hasn't in a while either! We'll have to make some time to go do that; I know she'd love it."

🌾- "Do you and s/i ever go to farms for hayrides? Would you ever want to?"

"Oh, absolutely! Juni's good friends with the old farmer, so he's always more than willing to give us a ride. We always stop in the orchard and pick apples to take home for Sitron, and the farmer's wife brings us cider. It's always such a nice time.☺"

🍄- "Any fun stories from the season or silly fall stories? Tell one!"

"OH OH I KNOW JUST THE ONE! So, Juni and I were visiting with my family, right? She was downstairs showing my mother and a few of the cooks how to make her aunt's pumpkin pie. Everything was going well until one of my big brothers decided it would be a good idea to try and scare the poor, jumpy thing. Well, he goes and jumps out from behind her, only for her to scream and throw that raw pie right in his face! She felt horrible, but I just couldn't STOP laughing!"

(Insert pie here)- "Do you and s/i enjoy the pumpkin flavored treats? (Pumpkin pie, pumpkin spice, ect)?"

"I personally only like the pumkim pie she and her family makes. That's why she was teaching it to the cooks back home to begin with.😅 Apart from that, I'm not a fan. Juni really likes pumpkin cookies though!"

🌰- "What's your favorite autumn activity to do together?"

"I just love reading by the fire. She rests her little head on my shoulder and I use my finger to help her follow along with me. We just sit like that in complete silence until she starts talking about the book we're reading. You should have seen the look on her face when we got to the end of the mystery novel! I saw it coming a mile away, but she was so shocked!"

[blueink3]

Omg I think every day about the fact that carlos told no one (NO ONE?) about the break up and just how alone he must have felt as we would’ve thought that the 126 are tk’s friends and would take his side and he wouldn’t wanna rock the boat. I think so much about tk finding out about that, and also canon divergence playing on this fact. My fave I love to torture myself with is where Andrea goes to their loft and he tells her they broke up and he breaks down. I’m genuinely surprised not more people have written fic about it bc it’s so angsty and good material (and genuinely surprised there aren’t as many canon divergent break up fics too, my guilty pleasure). I would love love love to read your fic. Also, what was the other snippet you revealed from it? I’d love to read♥️

“TK! You got a visitor!” 

TK drops the inventory clipboard on the floor of the rig, frowning as he pokes his head out the back door. “I do?” 

Marjan’s eyes are wide and her expression is tight as she stands next to the truck in the next bay. “Uh huh.” 

“What is it? Why are you being weird?” 

Intrigued by anything remotely resembling hot goss, Nancy pushes past him and hops down from the rig, hurrying around the corner and stopping dead when she catches sight of whoever this mystery visitor is. “Oh.” 

TK grabs his phone where’d he left it on the pile of clean puke buckets, frowning when the screen lights up with a string of notifications: 

[Missed Call] Carlos Reyes

[Missed Call] Carlos Reyes

[Missed Call] Carlos Reyes

[Carlos] Please pick up your phone. 

[Carlos] TK please.

[Carlos] It’s an emergency.

His heart thunders, and he barely has a second to contemplate what his ex could need him so urgently for before he hears it. That voice. “TK!” 

His head snaps up and he shoves his phone into his pocket, as he blurts out, “Andrea! I mean - Mrs. Reyes. Um.” What’s the protocol here? He glances at Marjan again, but she just subtly shakes her head in a move that is no help whatsoever.  

“TK, mijo, you’ve been hiding from us,” Andrea says scoldingly, even as she steps forward through the bay door and wraps him up in a hug. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t sink into it, breathing in the scent that reminds him of the ranch and Carlos and home. “I know you had to work over the holidays, but you’ve missed so many Sunday meals. How else am I supposed to give you your present?” she pulls away and cups his cheek with the hand not holding a neatly wrapped box. 

Behind him, he can hear Nancy whisper, “Oh my God” as the confusion in his brain morphs into a kind of numb white noise. 

Mijo. Mijo. Mijo. 

He doesn’t deserve mijo. 

Brakes wail, a light bar shines, and Carlos tumbles out of his cruiser a moment later, brown eyes wide with panic, breath puffing in the cold January air as he strides over to them. It’s a good thing TK’s mind is already blank because it’s the first time he’s seen his ex-boyfriend since he came to collect the last of his things, and the fact that he’s now close enough to touch is nearly enough to send TK to his knees. 

“Carlitos, what are you doing?” Andrea asks with a laugh. “You didn’t have to come. I told you I was in the area.”

“And I told you you didn’t have to do that,” Carlos grinds out, licking his lips and refusing to meet TK’s stunned gaze. 

“Ahh,” she wags a finger at him. “First it was the move, then it was work. Just because you want your boyfriend to yourself doesn’t mean you can’t share him from time to time with the rest of your family.”

The word skids across TK’s mind with all the grace of a pair of screeching tires. 

Boyfriend. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Judd grab Marjan and Nancy by an arm each and steer them back towards the kitchen, and thank God, too, because this car wreck does not need more witnesses.

He finally chances a glance back at Carlos. 

He’s beautiful. 

He’s terrified. 

And TK knows. He knows that this could go one of two ways. He could break Andrea Reyes’ hopeful heart, or… 

He could break his own. 

After all, it’s already shattered. What difference would it make?