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underneaththe-waterfall · 3 years

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How do I put up with you?

Why is there barely and Bambam angst ?like anywhere?😖

summary: You and bambam have an argument as he says you are buying to many clothes. You both end up having an argument which leads to Bambam fucking you until you fall asleep.

CONTAINS: ANGST , SMUT , FLUFF. ALSO (hair pulling and oral sex )

F/N= friends name

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN I BUY TO MANY CLOTHES” you say sitting on the couch with your arms crossed and an expression on your face that was starting to scare Bambam. This whole thing started when Bambam saw you walk into the house with like 6 bags of clothes and an extra bag full to the brim with makeup. Its not that Bambam doesn’t like it when you shop and neither is he stingy , but he had noticed lately how often you went shopping and by now his whole wardrobe along with your own was full of your clothes.

It started with Bambam speaking to you calmly but it all just rubbed you the wrong way and you got defensive and by now you both were yelling in each others faces .”DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT I HAVE TO HANG MY CLOTHES IN THE TOILET BECAUSE I HAVE NO SPACE IN MY WARDROBE BECAUSE OF YOU”. In the beginning of this argument when Bambam began yelling at you it shocked you as it was very uncommon for him to yell at you, but now you wanted to fight back.

“THEN WHY DONT YOU BUY YOURSELF ANOTHER WARDROBE!” at this point Bambam felt so angry he felt like he was gonna explode. You were really taking this too far. “You buy all this stuff out our shared account and were gonna go bank corrupt soon and we all know who contributes the majority of the money in the account and its clearly not you.” Bambam replies in an annoyed tone clearly stopping himself from yelling.

This crossed the line for you. Bambam knew how insecure you were about you job as a fashion designer as you were still a beginner so you weren’t really making a lot of money. Instead you were stuck being an assistant for another fashion designer who payed you very less. Despite how less your pay was you still always put it in your and Bambams shared account so it was fair for the both of you. This truly hurt you because there was no way you were expecting that from Bambam.

You remained silent now just looking at the floor trying not to cry, It was getting too difficult as now your eyes were stinging and your throat was closing up because of how badly you wanted to cry. From the corner of your eye you could see Bambam watching you. You kept your gaze on the floor as you walked out the living room straight to your and Bambams bedroom and locked the door. You heard him say something but you were so blanked out that you didn’t even hear. As soon as you entered the room you let it all out. You laid there on the bed and cried. You had been told many times by fans and others that you were just a failure and fashion designers earnt nothing and thats why you were with Bambam;because you were a gold digger and just wanted him for his money.

This was always a part of your relationship that made you feel insecure. You didn’t like the fact that bambam had to pay for if not all, most the things you bought. Even your mum had told you to get a real job. So now was the time you got a real job. Your friends family owned a cafe and she always offered you a job there so you both could work together. You declined the offer kindly and decided to follow your dreams. But you were clearly not living in the real world if you thought you could just follow your dreams and become whatever you wanted. At this point you needed money. You didnt want to spend any of Bambams money from now on. Especially not after how he reacted.

So you called your friend and it took less then two rings for her to pick up and answer in a cheerful tone “HELLO OMG WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN YOU HAVENT SPOKEN TO ME SINCE AGESSS” you chuckle at her excitement and answer back “F/N i just spoke to you yesterdayy” she let out an over exaggerated sigh and answered “Anyways why did u call its not like you to call me when your with your fancy boyfriend .”You roll your eyes at her even though she couldn’t see and laugh.

“Umm, can I work at your cafe from tomorrow I know this is very short noticed but-” she cut you off with an excited squeal and she answered “OFCOURSE YOU CAN IM LITERALLY THERE RIGHT NOW AND ITS SO BORING” you smile at her answer. You were truly lucky to have her. ”Okay ill be there tomorrow morning” you respond. You could hear a customer behind her and she answers back in a rush “Okay ill see you i gtg” and before you could even answer she cut the phone.

You fell back on to the bed and let out a breath you hadn’t realised you had been holding. You would no longer spend Bambams money. You lay there in a bed for a while before you heard a timid knock on the door. So now was when he had decided to apologise. You ignored him before the knock turned a little louder. After ignoring it for a while you heard him twist the door handle and let out a sigh .”Can you open the door I just wanna have a shower.” You were dumbfounded. He really just wanted a shower? You went and opened the door not even looking at him for a second before laying back down on the bed and going on your phone. Bambam was just as stubborn as you and also didn’t spare you a glance as he headed to the wardrobe in front of you. You watched him from behind as he opened the wardrobe .A bag of your clothes that you had just bought recently fell out of the wardrobe and all your clothes in the bag fell on the floor.

Bambam looked back at you as if to prove his point but you quickly closed your eyes not wanting him to think your paying any attention to him. He let out a groan and began picking up your clothes that had fell on the floor and put them back in the bag that you lazily hadn’t gotten rid of. He began looking through his clothes and took out a pair of grey shorts and a loose black shirt. You watched him as he took out his towel and shut the drawer. Even though you were really angry at him you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. This time when he looked back at you , you didn’t look away. You looked at him as he looked back at you with a blank expression. He looked away quickly heading to the bathroom.

By the time Bambam got out it was beginning to get dark. You headed to the bathroom as soon as he got out and had a long warm shower. Usually you would wear one of his shirts or hoodies but today you didn’t want to. Instead you wore one of your own loose shirts and headed to the bed after turning off the lights. Even in the dark you could see that Bambam was already half asleep .You thought to yourself ‘am i petty enough to sleep on the sofa or make him sleep on the sofa?’ You decided to against it as you were not in the mood to get back pains especially when you had work tomorrow. You also decided that there was no point telling Bambam that you have work tomorrow. He would probably be glad that you would no longer have to spend his money anyways. (you were wrong)

You laid down on your side of the bed instantly wrapping yourself around the blankets and it felt so good after a long day of arguing with bambam. You were laying there in your own thoughts until you felt an arm wrap around your waist pulling you closer. Bambam always done this in his sleep and usually you found it adorable but not today. You took his arm and not so gently removed it from your waist moving further away from him. But all your effort went down the drain as he pulled you close again and mumbled something in his sleep. You decided there was no point moving him away any longer as it would result in you staying up all night. You got yourself comfortable in Bambams arms (even though you didn’t want to) and fell asleep in seconds.

You woke up to the sound of your alarm going off extremely loudly and a grumpy looking bambam sitting crossed leg on the bed with his arms crossed staring at you. He had a pout on his face and he seriously looked like he was about to cry. For a second you nearly forgot about yesterday and were about to jump onto and cuddle him but then you stopped yourself. The alarm went of so you could get ready for work. You turned off the alarm and you could feel Bambams eyes on you. When you finally looked at the time you realised you didn’t have long left and that you should begin getting ready.

Bambam finally spoke as he saw you get up from the bed in a rush. “Where are you going.” You honestly didn’t want to reply but you didn’t want to have disturbed his sleep to not even tell him the reason why. ”I have to go to work.” he looked deep in thought for a second before he spoke again “But you have no work on Saturday”.You groaned and answered him “Well now I do and you should be glad because ill no longer spend your money and ill pay you back all of the money you’ve spent on me dont worry.”

He had nothing to say. Bambam did not expect you to take everything so seriously. He didn’t want you to overwork yourself and there was no way you could pay him back for all the money he spent on you. It was simply too much. Bambam didn’t meet your eyes as you left for the bathroom. He waited for you to get out the bathroom and the second you walked out he cornered you against the wall with both his arms on either side of your head.

“Your not going work. ”He says firmly looking at you in such an intense way that you had to look away. You adjusted your towel under his stare and spoke “I do. Now move out of the way i’m gonna get late.” He looked at you for long enough for you to finally look back at him. He looked angry and it was clear to you it was getting hard for him to remain calm. You moved around so you could get away from him but he wouldn’t budge.

This whole thing was starting to annoy you. First he told you that you waste all his money and now that you wanted to make more money for yourself he wasn’t letting you do it. You couldn’t understand what was wrong with him. “OMG WHATS WRONG WITH YOU IM GONNA GET LATE TO WORK BECAUSE OF YOU , SO FUCKING ANNOYING UGH.” You screamed in his face whilst hitting his chest with your fists and he didn’t even flinch for a second. You hadn’t even realised that you were hitting his chest until he held both your wrists with his hands.

Now he looked really pissed of. He tightened his jaw as he spoke “How dare you speak to me like that.” The confidence you had a second ago had now all disappeared. You looked away from his as he spoke , your wrists still in his hold. When he saw that you weren’t gonna answer him, his hold on your wrists tightened and you let out a whimper. It was clear that you had pissed Bambam off too much. There was no way he was going to let you get away with this.

“Take off your towel and get here” he says while he lets go of your wrists and moves to sit on the edge of the bed. You didn’t want to annoy him even more by not doing as he said so you began to strip yourself of your towel as he watched your every move. You tried to hurry as you quickly took of your panties after your towel and walked towards him feeling very exposed.

He motioned for you to lay across his lap so your ass would be right in front of him on his lap. Now you knew exactly what was about to happen. ”Good” You hear Bambam say as he rubbed his hands all over your ass occasionally squeezing your skin. You were laying there your eyes getting droopy until you felt a harsh slap on your ass that made you jolt awake. You let out a whine as Bambam messages the spot he just hit .You could still feel the sting of the previous slap until he slapped the same spot again .He began messaging the spot again and by now you had tears in your eyes. He gave your ass a last strong slap before he told you to get off his lap. The last hit was so bad that tears began to fall from your eyes and you let out a groan.

When you stood up the pain on your ass magnified and you winced at the feeling. Bambam also stood up after you and you felt so small in front of him. He towered over you as he spoke “Get on all fours on the bed.” You done what he said immediately getting on your hands and knees on the bed. You waited for him to do something as you couldn’t see him. You heard some shuffling and by the time you saw Bambam he was only wearing his boxers and getting onto the bed.

You could see his bulge through his black boxers and you wondered to yourself how long hes been hard for. You faced forward as he was on his knees right behind you. You felt his hand wonder around your ass and you winced at how sensitive your ass had become. His hand wondered up all the way up your spine to your neck. He pushed your neck down and you took that as a sign to move your head to the bed and then his hand reached to the centre of your back. You understood what he meant and you arched your back.

After you were in position Bambam moved his finger down to your pussy moving your wetness around. He had no idea that this whole situation would arouse you so much. He moved his head in between your legs from behind you instantly licking the lips of your pussy. You tried your best not to make a sound as his tongue didn’t go in but licked the outside of your pussy. He used two of his fingers to open your lips and he began drinking up all your wetness. He was moving his tongue so fast and his fingers were also circling around your clit. You felt like you were gonna pass out.

For what felt like an eternity ,Bambam continued to eat you out and by now your legs were giving out and you felt like you were about to cum. You let out a particularly loud moan as his tongue circled around your entrance and you moved your hips back onto his face out of desperation to reach your orgasm. He held your hips firmly now stopping all movements of your hips and continued .As your orgasm approached your body began slightly shaking and Bambam knew you were about to cum. He moved his face away suddenly and you let out a whine now feeling extremely needy.

“Did you really think it was that easy?” He says with a small chuckle and you let out a groan in response. It was clear that he had pulled down his boxers as now you could feel the tip of his cock circling around your pussy. You could come just from the feeling of that. You could feel how hard bambam was and you had no idea how he could remain so composed even though he was rock hard. You wanted him to fuck you so bad , you moved your hips back and let out a needy wine. You heard Bambam mutter “What a slut” as he moved the tip of his dick to your entrance. He pushed it in all the way in one go and you let out the loudest moan you had let out that night.

You felt intoxicated as bambam held onto your hips tightly as he thrusted into you hard and fast. You could feel his anger and hurt through the way he was moving. Bambam pulled your hair making your back arch even more as he fucked into you. You could hear his grunts and it was all getting too much for you. Your legs couldn’t keep you up any longer as you were about to cum.

Bambam could see that your legs were about to give out so he held you up his grip tightening around your hips as he moved his hips even faster.” Aagh im gonna cum” you say in between breaths and it was getting too hard for you to speak. You heard him hum as he sped up pushing your head into the bed as he continued to fuck you.

With another harsh thrust you could feel Bambam reaching deep inside of you and you let out a whine as he hit your special spot. He noticed this and continue to thrust into the same spot until you screamed out his name as you came. Bambam was really close to and he slowed down a little in case you felt very sensitive.When he couldnt control himself any more he took hold of your hands putting them behind your back as he held your wrists. He fucked you even harder letting out all his built up anger and with a grunt you could feel Bambam filling you up.

He pulled out as you collapsed onto the bed completely breathless and you both were covered in sweat .He laid down beside you not looking at you. You remained silent until he spoke “You don’t need to over work yourself. Theres no shortage of money.” You didn’t say anything as sleep was begining to take over you.You didnt know what bambam said after that as you fell into deep sleep not even caring about the argument anymore.

Bambam looked to see if you were still awake as he wanted to apologise but he smiled when he saw you now completely asleep. He felt guilty for saying the stuff that he did but he seriously no longer had any space of his own. He moved a piece of hair that had fallen on your face and noticed how exhausted you looked. He placed a gentle kiss on you lips and got up to get a towel.

He returned to your sleeping figure on the bed and tried to clean you as gently as possible. You were so deep in your slumber that you didn’t even move an inch as Bambam pulled your legs apart in order to clean you properly and to remove his cum from your body. After he had cleaned you up he heard the sound of your phone ringing and decided to check who it is. It was F/N. Bambam picked up the phone to hear immediately “ OMG Y/N WHERE ARE YOUU I TOLD MY MUM YOU WERE COMING TO HELP TODAYYY , SHE WAS SO EXCITED SHE EVEN-” Bambam cut her off by answering. He had realised that you were about to start working at your friends cafe.”Uh hi its bambam , Y/N’s asleep right now and she wont be coming today ill let her know you called.” Bambam was hoping your friend wouldn’t get upset that you weren’t coming. After a second F/N replied “Ah um okay let her know I called” and after that she immediately cut the phone.

Bambam laid down next to you and let out a sigh whilst wrapping his arms around you. He smiled as he pulled you closer and mumbled “stupid” with a chuckle .”I love you” he said before he also fell asleep.

MASTERLIST

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yellowocaballero · 4 years

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Prequel to ‘The Crow’s Funeral’: How Agnes + Gerry met, then proceeded to set Jon on fire.

Exactly what it says on the tin. This exists because I was rereading TCF and went “hey did I ever figure out how Agnes and Gerry met”. I didn’t, so this is it. Rest under the cut. No specific warnings except for the fact that, shockingly enough, Jon had gone through a lot of character development prior to the start of TCF and was actually a complete asshole for a year or two.

“Daisy? What are you looking for?”

Agnes’s expression stretched into terror. She mouthed ‘fuck!’, and slapped a hand over her mouth. She didn’t breathe, and her chest never rose and fell, but she abruptly started trembling.

For the first time, Gerry reached out to reassure her. But her body heat had abruptly tripled, and Gerry was forced to pull back. In the small, unventilated space, it quickly became overwhelmingly hot.

“Shut it off!” Gerry hissed, as quietly as he physically could. “They’ll feel it -”

“That is the most dangerous monster in the world,” Agnes whispered, and Gerry fell silent. “Don’t move.”

For the first time in a very long time, in an apocalyptic world built on terror and fear, Gerry felt afraid.

Agnes was back.

Gerry didn’t know how she had found him. His hiding place was pretty well hidden, thank-you-very-much. Adults were always trying to barricade themselves in houses - stupid, when the nightshades could drift through shit - and kids were always trying to hide in closets or attics. But Gerry was the perfect mix of adult and child - or, as they’re known, teenagers - and he had way too much experience stripping houses down for the possessions of the recently deceased.

So Gerry knew about crawl spaces. Like in the Magician’s Nephew, some older row houses had little secret tunnels between each house. You couldn’t quite get into each house normally, but there were always gaps and weak points and hatches. Even better, at the very top there was a hidden attic where the generator and power box lived. It was small, and there were definitely some gross animal corpses that Gerry could have sworn moved, but it was mostly safe. So much as anything was safe.

But, somehow, Agnes had found him. Gerry didn’t know what she was doing exploring row houses for fun, but judging from the scent of smoke that’s been in the air lately he didn’t want to know.

The sharp rapping echoed through the small attic, directly under the hatch with a huge heavy space heater dumped on it. Gerry had other means of entry, and Agnes thought that was the only door. Please! As if Gerry would live somewhere with only one escape exit. That was just asking to get stuck in a nightmare for a month.

But, then again, maybe Agnes had never had to worry about that.

“I brought food!” The high, clear voice called out - slightly muffled from the ceiling/floor, but unmistakable. “It’s Twinkies! Come down to eat it!”

“No way!” Gerry called down back. “I bet you put offal in it!”

“What does offal mean!”

“It’s, like, organs! Go away, lady!”

“I told you!” Agnes called back, weirdly delighted. “My name’s Agnes! I’m a Princess!”

“Princess of what, being lame!”

“Fuck you!”

“Fuck you, Princess Agnes!”

“Fuck me yourself!”

Ugh! She was so annoying! This was her fourth fucking time coming by here, and ever since she had realized that he was just a teenage boy she had been leaving food in front of the attic door. It was always weird food, too. Didn’t she know what humans ate?

Stupidly on cue, Gerry’s stomach rumbled. Ugh.

“Go away,” Gerry called back, eager for her to just leave already so he could eat the shitty food she had undoubtedly left. “I don’t feel like getting turned into a candle today!”

For some reason, she didn’t reply to that. Gerry wondered if she was trying to fool him into thinking she was leaving, but joke’s on her - Gerry could hear footsteps all the way through the house. He waited with bated breath for a minute, two minutes, slowly growing confused why she wasn’t either yelling at him or leaving.

He’d never tell her, but he kind of enjoyed fighting with her.

Finally, she called out, with an emotion in her voice that he had never heard from her before, “Is that why you won’t come out? You think I’d turn you into a candle?”

Gerry was flabbergasted. “Yes?” he called back. “You turn everyone into candles.”

“...it’s not just because you don’t like me?”

Aw, man. Gerry abruptly felt a little bad for the flame monster cult leader lady. She couldn’t be any older than him. “You’re really nice,” Gerry called back, feeling like an idiot. “I just didn’t make it this far by not being careful! Thanks for the food, though!”

A longer silence this time. For some reason, Gerry felt a weird kind of anxious. Not the normal level of ‘aaah im gonna get eaten’ anxious. But something different. He couldn’t describe it.

Finally, Agnes called back, “Do you want me to stop bothering you? I’m sorry if I’ve been harassing you. I’m not good at - at all of this.”

Gerry sat in his own silence, sitting cross-legged in front of the space heater on top of the hatch. His baggy jeans clung to his legs, slightly sweaty and definitely unwashed, and his raggedy thin black jacket was also a little sweaty. His hair was plastered to his head, limp and dirty. Wherever Agnes went, heat followed.

People who made dumb decisions didn’t live very long. Gerry had lived for quite a while - well, he was fifteen, but he had made it all year without getting eaten, which was really quite impressive.

And he had made it alone. When he woke up in this green and terrifying world, Mum hadn’t been there. He had looked for her for months. He had almost been ripped to shreds in Pinhole Books. She wasn’t in any of their usual London hideaways, either. Maybe she was outside of London, somewhere far away…

In all of Gerry’s books, he’d pack up his backpack and set out to look for Mum. He wouldn’t stop until he found her. Then he’d find out that she’d been embroiled in some plot to stop all of this, and he’d help her, and she’d hug him…

But it wasn’t a book. No matter how strange this new world was, fiction couldn’t begin to match. And Gerry didn’t really miss his Mum. Not really. He missed the fact that he was alone. He missed the fact that she was powerful and smart and talented, and definitely would have been able to protect the both of them. Gerry had to protect himself now, and he missed that safety more than he ever missed Mum.

Gerry wondered if Agnes was lonely. How could she, with a whole cult?

It was a stupid decision. But Gerry had always trusted too easy, anyway.

He stood up and pushed the space heater with a thick, screeching grinding sound that scraped uncomfortably along the wood. With a final heave, he pushed it off the hatch, and reluctantly bent down to lift the hatch and unfold the ladder.

“If you turn me into a candle I’m giving you an allergy attack,” Gerry called down, and the girl known as Agnes Montague smiled up at him brilliantly.

***

That wasn’t how Agnes and Gerry started. But it had been, maybe, how they got going.

Agnes, Gerry found out very quickly, was a hot-tempered girl. Save the jokes. She was always dressed like a sixties hippie, and her long red hair was always somehow glistening and clean. She let Gerry touch it, very carefully, and - yep, even the hair was wax. What a weird person.

After a bit of frantic introductions and suspicious squinting from both sides, Gerry and Agnes had eventually sat down cross-legged from each other as Gerry stuffed Twinkies in his mouth and she eyed them warily. She had eyed them with a bit of trepidation, but Gerry’s obvious joy at eating them must have made her curious. That was one thing Agnes was: curious. Almost to death.

“You really live up here? And you’ve never gotten trapped by a nightmare?”

Gerry shrugged uncomfortably, sucking at his fingers. “Yep. I run around town a lot too, cuz I get bored otherwise. It’s easy to evade all of that shit if you know how.”

“Wow.” It was probably her being a fire person or whatever, but Agnes’ eyes seemed to sparkle a little bit. “My cult members barely even let me outside by myself, and I can set shit on fire. You’re really weird for a human.”

Gerry couldn’t help but puff out his chest a little, even if he would have preferred her to use any other word than ‘weird’. “That’s what happens when your Mum trains you since birth to be a demon hunter.” He faltered a little. “I’m not sure if she knew this would happen, but I wouldn’t put it past her.”

“Your mum knew?” Agnes gasped. “I thought nobody knew about the Entities before the apocalypse!”

“Your cult members must have known, right?” Gerry pointed out, and Agnes nodded in concession of the point. “Yeah, there were always a few of us. Not a lot, though. Tight-knit community, everyone knew each other. Hobbyists, you know. It sucked. Most of the people who got involved in the supernatural were jerks.” Actually, now that Gerry thought about it… “That crazy apocalypse prepper Salasea must be coming out like a bandit right now.”

Agnes nodded sagely, as if she knew who Salasea was. Maybe she did? Gerry had always gotten the impression that if all of the demon hunters knew each other, then maybe all of the demons did too. Eventually word about Mum had really started to get around.

“You’re the first interesting human I’ve met,” Agnes said thoughtfully. “Most of them just - like, scream, you know? Or pretend I’m not there. Like if they don’t acknowledge me then I can’t hurt them. And, like, that’s the way it works for a lot of these things! But I’m a person too, you know?”

“You really aren’t.”

“I have feelings,” Agnes said firmly. “But maybe the reason why you’re still safe isn’t because you’re a super cool human hunter, Gerry.”

“It has to be a part of it,” Gerry said aggressively, eager to assert his masculinity and how cool he was.

“Of course,” Agnes allowed, making Gerry huff. “But I think it’s because you aren’t scared. You were wondering how I found you, right?” Gerry nodded slowly. He had been wondering how Agnes had caught on that he was living here. “It was because I felt a person - I can always feel body heat - but I didn’t taste any fear. I was setting some row houses on fire just to feel something, and you weren’t feeling anything either!” She set her expression firmly, almost bravely. “I think we’re the same.”

“A goth human teenager living in an attic and a flame princess of the fire cult?” Gerry asked skeptically. They couldn’t be less similar. Gerry lived each day in - well, as Agnes pointed out, not fear, but he was constantly just trying to survive. It was all he had ever known, but he knew that others didn’t live like that. He had known when he was a kid - that other kids were normal, were happy - and he knew it now. That a small handful of people in this world were having a blast, and that everyone else suffered. “We’re nothing alike.”

But Agnes faltered, just a bit, and Gerry just a little bit of that loneliness in her expression again. “You’re the only other kid who’s had a conversation with me.” She paused a beat. “Besides, like, Callum, but he’s a baby.”

Maybe, in a schoolyard or a town or a world, Gerry and Agnes weren’t so similar. Maybe they’d have nothing in common. But maybe, in this world that was both so isolated and so unified, they could be a little similar after all.

“I’ll allow it,” Gerry said graciously. He wanted to shake her hand, but he deeply knew that it was a bad idea. Instead, he broke his Twinkie in half, and held out the other one to her. “Friends?”

Agnes eyed the Twinkie warily. “Do you become friends by asking to be friends with someone?”

“I dunno, I don’t have any friends.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

But she took the Twinkie. It was a start.

****

Of course, Gerry and Agnes were far more alike than they had first thought. Mostly in the fact that their evil mothers had killed their fathers (which Gerry had the sneaking suspicion wasn’t a universal experience) and that the both of them were actually kind of literally protagonists of a YA book.

Well, Gerry had always been the protagonist of his own life. But he would write a story about Agnes too: about the spoiled princess who rejected her destiny. Who had a really cool previous life where she was all dramatic and sad and stuff, who died tragically only to be reborn as a magical teenage girl. Seriously, it was right out of a Sarah J Maas novel.

Maybe they latched onto each other too quickly, but it was the kind of latching on when you made friends with another kid at the orientation to summer camp and then religiously stuck to the kid once the actual camp started until you got another friend. Maybe. Gerry's never been to summer camp, how was he supposed to know.

But Agnes was sharply quick, surprisingly kind, and fiercely protective. Gerry had never met somebody who cared as much as her. It was really weird. He supposed that people like her, the powerful and destructive, had the privilege to care.

Agnes snuck over more and more often, and sometimes Gerry went to go visit her. Eventually they started roaming the streets together, loitering in businesses and committing general acts of tomfoolery. Gerry was an old hat at tomfoolery - he had only been vaguely supervised most of his life - but Agnes encroached every second of minor rule breaking with cautious glee.

Not that there really were rules anymore. Even if you were the kind of juvenile delinquent that got adults yelling at you and caused minor or major property damage, it wasn’t as if the cops were going to come and take you away. Either you got away with it, or you were eaten for a while. This was very natural to Gerry, and after a little bit of convincing it came easily to Agnes too. Maybe they really were well-suited for each other after all.

If Gerry’s Mum could see him now, she would call him ‘dreadful’ and ‘ill-mannered’ and ‘badly behaved’. But...she wasn’t there, so she could hardly complain. Served her right.

Months - maybe - later, Gerry and Agnes were hanging out in Gerry’s crawlspace again after a long day terrorizing demons and old men alike. They were splitting a blood orange - literally - and letting the sticky juice (juice?) run down their hands, laughing as Agnes imitated the look of shock on the old man’s face. Sitting down on the floor, flavor bursting sweet on his tongue, as Agnes teased him for dropping peels everywhere...Gerry was almost happy.

Rookie mistake.

Agnes sensed it first, stiffening slightly as her body pulsed slightly warmer. Gerry scooted a little further away from her carefully as she turned to look at the thin plaster wall, brow furrowing.

“Is it a nightmare?” Gerry whispered. “Or a person?”

“Neither,” Agnes whispered back. “It’s…”

Then Gerry heard it too: the clack of nails on hardwood, and a sound so terrifying it made his gut tie itself into knots. It was a growl, bestial and wet. Something was snarling outside.

Gerry stopped breathing, sitting absolutely still. The sounds of sniffing and snarling were loud and distinct, and he couldn’t help but stare at the sticky, juicy, smelly orange in his hands. Agnes was also still, far more completely than Gerry ever could be, carefully listening.

He wanted to whisper to Agnes, make a game plan, but the monster would hear them. Part of Gerry wanted to tremble in fear, but that wasn’t useful. He forced himself to calm down as best as he could while keeping his breaths minimal. Remember Dune. Fear was the mind killer. Fear is the little death.

But then Agnes smiled at him faintly, making a gentle gesture with her hand. Agnes was a literal fire messiah. She could take almost any monster. Gerry had never seen her afraid of anything, just contemptuous or annoyed. Having her there with him was more reassuring than any book quote, and Gerry exhaled softly as he smiled back at her. Agnes was going to torch that monster, and it would be super cool, and they’d high five, and -

“Daisy? What are you looking for?”

Agnes’s expression stretched into terror. She mouthed ‘fuck!’, and slapped a hand over her mouth. She didn’t breathe, and her chest never rose and fell, but she abruptly started trembling.

“Shut it off!” Gerry hissed, as quietly as he physically could. “They’ll feel it -”

“That is the most dangerous monster in the world,” Agnes whispered, and Gerry fell silent. “Don’t move.”

For the first time in a very long time, in an apocalyptic world built on terror and fear, Gerry felt afraid.

A faint yipping echoed through the space, almost like a dog. It could never be mistaken for a dog.

“Well, yes, there’s people everywhere. Other places have more people, even. Why can’t we just go there?” Another bark, a low bass cut. “Oh, if it’s a Hunt, then it’s alright.”

The heat was growing oppressive, and Gerry frantically motioned for Agnes to cut it out. He was withholding his own ragged breathing, and abruptly Gerry felt as if he couldn’t breathe. It was just making him more scared, the sweat trickling down his neck -

There was another yip, so close it might as well be made in his ear. It clearly came from directly in front of him.

Gerry couldn’t help it - he screamed, overwhelmed with fire and heat and fear and the wolf at their door.

The wall exploded.

Dust and insulation burst outwards in a fine white cloud, and Gerry and Agnes were abruptly coughing intensely and the wall cracked, folded, and collapsed inwards. Gerry was showered with fragments of wood and plaster, stifling another scream, and screwed his eyes shut against the sudden influx of light.

He cracked them open as quickly as he could, unwilling to meet whatever was in front of him with his eyes closed. Instantly, overwhelmingly, Gerry was brought face to snout with a giant wolf.

Gerry firmly believed that people weren’t meant to see apex predators up close. Nobody should be able to touch a bear, was Gerry’s opinion. What was an anaconda? Gerry was on the opposite side of the room. He wasn’t afraid, but he hadn’t made it to the ripe old age of fifteen without being highly cautious.

It wasn’t right, staring this wolf in the face. Every inch of it stood out to him: the slobber, the snarl, the canines almost as long as his hand. It was silvery white, with a thick ruff and coat, and Gerry watched in awe as the wolf snarled and -

And stopped snarling. It started looking at him curiously instead, bushy tail sweeping gently side to side.

The immediate problem almost solved, Gerry was able to take in the figure behind the wolf.

He was a guy. Unfairly tall, Black with curly hair drawn tight into a ponytail. Sharp features, undercut by unnaturally green eyes. He was in a suit that looked like he had put it on three months ago and had never changed. He was...wearing a trenchcoat? He was just a guy!

“A human!” The man - monster? Guy? Nightmare? Avatar? - cried. “Oh, good job, Daisy! You’re a fantastic investigator.” The wolf - Daisy was a stupid name for a wolf - barked lowly. “Yes, it is like an oven in here, isn’t it?”

Gerry opened his mouth, then closed it. He was still cowering on his ass, covered in dust and plaster. This guy was Agnes’ monster? Maybe she had mistaken him for someone else. “Who -”

“He’s even talking!” The man exclaimed, as if he was a dancing monkey. “They never talk to me voluntarily, you know.” Daisy barked again. “I think it’s cute! Kids are so repetitive, but this one smells great. Good job, Daisy.”

Before Gerry could protest the man stepped forward and looked down at him, and a sick realization trickled through him.

The man had nothing behind his eyes. Bright green, sick and churning, radioactive and poisonous. His expression was absent and vaguely curious, like a child watching an ant crawl through its anthill. Slowly, intensely, the man’s placid expression broke into a sharp and demented smile.

It wasn’t the smile of a human staring at a tasty sandwich. It wasn’t even the smile of a monster drawing a human into a nightmare. It was the smile of a child holding the magnifying glass to the ant: triumphant, because now the child got to see what happens when an ant blackened to a crisp. Elated, because they were the child, and not the ant. Victorious, because they could only remember the distinction in the act of causing harm.

“Statement of -”

“Leave him alone!”

The monster exploded into flames.

Agnes leapt from her position in the crawlspace, slightly tucked away out of sight, and shoved at the wolf hard. The wolf yowled, her handprints blackening its fur, and it retreated snarling.

It was not the first time Gerry had seen someone set on fire. It happened a lot, when you hung out with Agnes. But the man burned, in bright and beautiful red-hot flames, crackling and searing the skin and air and sky. His mouth was open in a silent scream.

Something green shone from within the flames.

Then the flames were gone. It was as if he had never been set on fire at all. At most he smelled vaguely of burning flesh, and his hair had broken free of its ponytail to settle in fuzzy waves.

The monster looked mildly peeved.

Agnes grabbed Gerry, leaving red-hot scorch marks on his hoodie, and yanked him behind her. Gerry was not embarrassed to say that he absolutely hid behind Agnes as she put herself between him and the monster and his wolf. The wolf who was now snarling deeply at them, and the slightly irritated monster who shook ash off his unharmed trench coat.

“I don’t care if you called dibs on him,” the monster bitched. “You don’t get to stop me in the middle of a - oh, Agnes!” The monster’s expression brightened as he snapped his fingers. “Agnes Montague, right? Your cult introduced me to you at - what was it -”

“Annabelle’s annual party five months ago,” Agnes said flatly. Her wax hair was still burning at the ends, and although Gerry couldn’t see her expression he knew it had to be fierce. “Nice to see you again, Jon. Now stay away from him.”

“If you called dibs then you shouldn’t have let me try to eat him,” Jon - which was the dumbest name for an evil monster - complained. He smelled his arm, grimacing. “Setting me on fire’s downright rude, Agnes. Didn’t Jude teach you any manners?”

“Go away!” Agnes yelled. Gerry realized quietly that she was still shaking. “He’s not yours! He’s the one thing you aren’t allowed to hurt!”

Jon frowned at her. Gerry could practically see it: Did_not_compute.exe. It simply didn’t make sense: that there was something in the world that he wasn’t allowed to hurt. That there was something in the world that was not his.

Before Jon could speak again, his wolf barked harshly at him. She kept barking, completely indecipherably, as Jon’s expression screwed up in uncomprehension. “What does it matter if they’re children.” The wolf barked. “I mean, I don’t actually care if we piss off the Desolation or not.” Bark, bark. “Why are you always guilt tripping me!” Bark, bark, bark, bark. Eventually Jon’s expression turned somewhat abashed, and then downright embarrassed.

“Right, right.” He turned back to Agnes and Gerry, a little sulky. “Sorry for trying to eat your human, Agnes. In my defense, he was quite -” The dog yipped. “ - innocent, and I’m sure he’s very fun. Great. Well, this was a waste of time. Call me if you get tired of him, Agnes.”

Jon turned to go, and Gerry could not see his back soon enough. The heat had died as Agnes calmed down, her arms crossed over her chest and scowling fiercely.

“Apologize to him!”

Jon froze, halfway across the room. Gerry quietly wanted to die.

The monster slowly turned on his heel, looking at Agnes with a faintly flabbergasted expression. “You can’t be serious -” The wolf barked again. Gerry had the impression that the wolf was in charge of him. “Stop ganging up on me -” Bark. “I don’t know how to talk to humans, don’t make me!” A very firm bark.

“Do it,” Agnes said firmly. “Or I’ll set you on fire again.”

Unbelievably, the monster groaned. He turned to Gerry, fluorescent eye twitching. “Alright, alright! Listen, uh - kiddo? Kiddo. I am very sorry that you tasted - I am very sorry that I tried to scar you for life and consume your trauma. I cannot stress enough how it’s nothing personal. There.” Weirdly enough, he looked a little proud of himself. “Hah. Totally rocked that talking to a human thing.”

“Uh,” Gerry said, too dizzy with the events of the last ten minutes to care very much about what he said, “is the wolf in charge of you?”

Even more unbelievably, the man brightened. “I’m her assistant! Not very many people pick that up. You’re very bright, little human. Do you want to pet her?” Jon glanced at Daisy, who looked unimpressed. Very loudly, he hissed at her, “Do children like petting dogs?”

The wolf, somehow, seemed to inform him that yes, they did.

They were in too deep now. Gerry walked up and petted the wolf. It was fucking awesome. Agnes groaned and pulled him back again very quickly. She seemed a little jealous. The wolf yipped at her and Agnes reluctantly petted the wolf too.

Jon clapped his hands. “Well! That was very unpleasant. I won’t ask what you’re doing hiding in a wall, Agnes. As a personal favor to you.”

“Thanks,” Agnes said flatly.

“Tell Diego and Jude that I’m not doing it. Or eating your human. As a personal favor to you.”

“Definitely will.”

“Fantastic.” Jon’s eyes glinted, in the soft light of Agnes’ flames. “I’m very happy you’ve reincarnated into that fun child’s body, Agnes. Children are so tempestuous and impulsive. I wouldn’t have tolerated an adult setting me on fire. You understand that, don’t you?”

Agnes nodded, almost shakily.

“You understand that for an adult, that would have had very different consequences.”

Agnes nodded again.

“Fantastic!” Then Jon was beaming again, all carelessness and laziness. “Have fun, you little delinquents. Come on, Daisy. I’m famished.”

He swanned off, wolf following closely on his tail. But the wolf looked back as it crossed the threshold, large yellow eyes piercing in a way that Gerry just couldn’t name, before they both disappeared. As slowly and terrifyingly as they had come.

Ten seconds passed, then fifteen.

Agnes crumpled to her knees and bent over the floor, shaking, and her hands pressed hot scorch marks into the wood. She was still shuddering, and Gerry bent down next to her. He couldn’t physically comfort her, but he could put his hand close to hers on the wood. As close as possible, yet never touching.

“We are so lucky to be alive,” Agnes breathed, before abruptly groaning. “I set him on fire! I set The Archivist on fire!”

The title tickled something in Gerry’s brain, bringing up an insane amount of questions, but he brushed them all aside. Gertrude was dead - or at the very least, very far away, where she was no good to him. She had to be, otherwise he would have noticed her cutting a swathe through Britain by now.

“Who is he?” Gerry asked. He didn’t really want to know, but...well, he was himself. He wanted to know everything. It was kind of his whole thing.

Agnes sat down on her knees, rubbing her forehead, and Gerry cautiously sat down next to her. “He’s the monster who sold the world. The most dangerous man ever made.”

“The most dangerous man in the world gets bossed around by his dog?” Gerry asked, before the words sunk in. “Wait, I thought that was Jonah Magnus!”

“Jonah Magnus doesn’t kill people because they annoy him!” Agnes snapped, before she groaned into her hands again. “And I set him on fire…Diego is going to kill me!”

“For what it’s worth,” Gerry said awkwardly, “I’m glad you set him on fire. He was kind of a dick.” He paused again, uncertain of how to say it. “And...thanks for caring, I guess. You really don’t have to.” He shrugged, unwilling to state what had always been unsaid between them. “I’m a human. These things happen to us. You just have to deal with it.”

That was the way of the world. It had always been that way, even before the apocalypse. The strong and powerful and important like Jon kicked around smaller people, and the smaller people just hoped they survived it.

Gerry was a survivor. Nobody had ever saved him before. Maybe because nobody had ever saved him before.

Agnes tackled Gerry in a tight, pressing hug. She wasn’t hot at all, just mildly warm - an incredible act of effort and concentration on her part. Her arms were solid and unyielding, never mistaken for flesh, but she clutched at him with a unique desperation. Gerry cautiously hugged her back, letting her bury her head into his shoulder.

“Not to you,” Agnes whispered. “Nothing bad’s going to happen to you. Not even The Archivist.”

“You can’t promise that,” Gerry whispered.

“We’re family.” Agnes separated from him, stubbornly fighting boiling tears. “And I’m sick of just dealing with it.”

Gerry opened his mouth, then closed it. “Family?” He said weakly.

Agnes blushed hotly. “If you want!” She tightened her fists on her skirt, winding the fabric between her fingers anxiously. “It’s just that - I know you don’t have anyone...and I have my cultists, but they don’t really care about me, not like you do...and I know it used to be different, that family used to mean something different, but I don’t care about what old people thought family meant. I care about you, and we’re sticking together, so that’s what we are.” She faltered a little. “If you want.”

“Siblings, then,” Gerry said faintly. “If you want.”

And he did want it. More than anything, Gerry wanted this.

When Agnes smiled at him, and she hugged him tightly again, Gerry was halfway certain that yet another disaster was about to befall them. He knew that meteors were going to strike, that the ground was going to open up and engulf them, that the world would end in fire and ice, because Gerry was so happy it clenched his heart. He was so happy he couldn’t breathe.

“It’ll be okay,” Agnes said into his shoulder, “we’ll never have to deal with Jonathan Sims again. I promise.”

****

It was not a promise Agnes kept.

They ran into him again. And again. And again. Eventually, after meeting a monstrous golem of fear and suffering that induced paralyzing fear so frequently, said simulacrum of human experience became slightly tiresome. And you realized that he was, actually, really not that bright. Or at the very least not very mature. And that his wolf sister kind of wore the pants in that relationship. That he and his wolf sister were like Agnes and Gerry, in every possible way. And that he was, weirdly, deeply kind. And that he loved, so bright and pure and fearsome that it had brought down the world. That he was capable of loving Gerry. Maybe even, given enough time, anyone.

Many months later, as Gerry, Agnes, Jon, and Daisy sat in an ice cream shop splitting blood orange ice cream (with real blood!) and bickering endlessly about if Friends was the Flesh or the Stranger, that Gerry thought he might feel something familiar in his chest.

Something that clenched his heart, something that made him so happy he couldn’t breathe. Something that felt like fire and ice and meteors and disaster.

Jon must have felt it. He looked at Gerry, surprised, with ice cream slowly dripping from his spoon and congealing on the table. “What’s wrong with you? Are you ill? Agnes, is he ill?”

“No,” Gerry said, wiping at his eyes. “I guess I’m happy again.”

Everybody stared at him, slightly dumbfounded.

Daisy barked.

“You’re quite right, Daisy,” Jon said.

He didn’t tell them what she was right about, and Gerry never asked. He already knew.

#my writing #be nice to jon this is like his first time talking with a human outside of eating them #how would YOU feel if people started waving a chicken in your face and told you to apologise #nobody asked for this and i haven't thought about jonbackers in a while but you know what? maybe i should #also I found an old scrapped short story of mine that was 'hey you know if jon hadn't run from martin in the beginning #then NONE of this story would have ever happened'#might post that too not sure #gerard keay #agnes montague #jonathan sims #daisy tonner #why the fuck do i write anybody other than teen gerry

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aw-eather · 4 years

Text

Heather Watches SG1 s7ep13: Grace

Hello friends! I asked on twitter which one you wanted to see next and this was the one so.. I genuinely really enjoy this episode but I don’t think it would be top five? The Kiss TM obviously is up there but its so... sad.. BUT I think its a beautifully shot episode and the director is wonderful. Also if I ever meet Damien Kindler, I have a list of questions.

I watched this a few weeks ago but am posting it today (11/085/2020) because I forgot I had even typed the notes until the other night when i asked.

As always, I swear quite a bit but I also cried quite a lot in this episode becuse well I’m a hopeless romantic, I love Space Dad and I had just been dumped so all the angst hurts haha

also also, I leave most if not all my typos in here because I think it makes it funnier and I don’t usually look at my keyboard when I type so I make mistakes. I’m not perfect at touch typing by any standard and I still don’t do it properly anyway.

Previously on which I don’t need because I’ve seen this show soooo many times

Fucking Ronson man

Mum says she’s prepared but she’s not

Thers a storm coming and she doesn’t know how bad its gonna be

Two hours top turns into 4 days,

HER FUCKING GRIN OH MY GOD

Remember your mission, bitch this is Samantha Carter, she forgets nothing and always stick to the mission plan (see The First Commandment, etc. etc.)

Uh oh

Not a ship on its way

I wonder who or what is on it. Well we never find out so no point asking

CREDITS

I am trying to eat and type at the same time this will not go well

END CREDITS

Love that black curtain with tiny lights they’re using for stars

Cute ship, foe

Of course you wanna talk to them, Ronson but I don’t think its gonna go well babe

Powering up weapons but you won’t get awwwwaaaaayyyyy

Straight into the unknown not-quite-nebula

SAM NO

WHAT A BAD FUCKING IDEA

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

DAMIAN KINDLER

And BAM baby hit her head

Silence

More silence

Fucking creepy kid

But if you wanna feel old she’s married and has a kid on the way

You are alone my love

Poor Sam

Of course you do hun cause you’re a good solider

The didn’t leave you alone honey, they were beamed out

Cuts gone

Just saying

Poor Sam

She’s all alone and nothings working and I just wanna hug her

Teal’c being a sweetie

Being the voice of reason

Stopping her from dying

“If you sleep, you will die” *Sam falls asleep*

FUCKING KID GIVING ME THE CREEPS

Sam: Is someone there?

Me: IDK Are they?

Cuts back

Smart girl <3

We don’t wanna play with you, you scare us

Cuts gone

“Were you this annoying when you were ascended?”

“Depends who you ask”

The answer is yes, Sam

He is always that annoying

Her subconscious brain is trying to provide her people to bounce her ideas off of

This is the part of her that wants to explore the cloud, the scientist that battles with the military side of her

Beautiful shot of him standing behind her

Uh oh the ships making noises

Peter Woste (director) makes some really beautiful shots

Ooooh

This hurts

Daniel has no idea how lost Jack is

Of course he heard, ya bloody dick head

Jack is so worried about his girl

“Tok’ra can’t send a ship” no they ever can

What is the point of an alliance if only one side ever does anything?

Is this the first time Daniel is realising Jack’s feelings for Sam?

Because he seems shocked at Jack’s anger/frustration

THIS FUCKING KID

TEAL’C

He calls her Samantha which he NEVER calls her its…. An interesting choice

He’s right, everything is not as it seems

Sam thinking of other ideas that she would normally bounce off her boys so she’s bouncing it off… subconscious images of her boys

And she passed out again

Poor babe :(

Awwww I wanna hug her and protect her

Honestly I think this way would have worked if it weren’t for that FUCKING KID

She’s not real Sam!

Who is this kid anyway?

Alien? Gas cloud?

Her face at the idea of it being a sentient cloud

“Because its corrosive?” LOL

And shes out again

Did she?? Interesting

Yeah but actually talking would have helped kid

Ooooooh no

Dad’s about to be here

I’m Grace… https://youtu.be/688OPQ9WFpA

Hold on while I cry

HES NOT TALKING ABOUT JACK SAMANTHA

HE WANTS YOU TO BE WITH JACK YA BLOODY GOOSE

DON’T BE AN IDIOT

Oh an initial trace huh?

Useless fucking shits

They all know he loves her

Its written on their faces

And he’s been doing such a good job of holding it in, damnit

That little look down

A brother to Teal’c awww

JACK HE JUST TOLD YOU SAM STILL LOVES YOU

AND YOU LET HER GET ENGAGED TO PETE IM A CREEP SHANAHAN

WHY YOU DO THE THING AT THE END OF THE EPISODE

Oh NO NOT THE BUBBLES

Baby Sam wondering how a bubble can exist

Adorable

I’m gonna cry again

Interesting that jack is in street clothes not uniform

Because this is how she pictures him

Samantha

I’m crying at this conversation

I could write out everything they say And what it all means because it all HURTS but we all know it off by heart I’m too lazy to rehash it here

I HAD TO HOLD IN A SCREAM

THE KISS AND LETTING HIM GO (she never really did tho let’s not kid ourselves) AND OH MY GOD IT HURTS

THIS FUCKING KID

Bubbles

Dead ass tho i nearly threw something during Sam and Jacks scene

And whats worse is when she’s back, he would have sat there the entire time until she woke up

And the fear of anybody else hearing her call him Jack

And making an assumption that they’re together and therefore ruining her career

Makes him shut her down and then she really knows that she has to move on

Because she doesn’t know how scared he was when she was missing

And that he was just as scared as she was when he was gone

But she’ll never know that

Because he’ll never tell her

I’m crying again

The way he looks at her

And says shes fine and says you are

And her sad look

I fucking can’t handle it y’all

I just want them both to be happy and with each other but they’re too emotionally inept to say anything to each other so this is what we have to deal with

And now I have to deal with PETE

FUCKING PETE

Final Thoughts:

I literally cried three times in that episode. Normally its once with Jacob’s scene but this time it was every time Jack was there too. I think my recent breakup is making me soft and all I can handle right now is fluff. Anything else hurts.

I love that episode with my entire being but fuck me does it hurt

Also who or what is Grace? I have SO many questions.

Its a beautifully shot episode though

And Amanda’s acting is ace. So is RDAs.

BUT FUCK MGM FOR NEVER LETTING US HAVE CONFIRMATION OUTSIDE OF ONE PICTURE AND A PASSWORD

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butterbeeryuta · 4 years

Text

lee jeno as your husband

a/n: happy birthday jeno ✨ik you’re just 20 and here i am writing you as a husband im sorry KDJKSJDSDKJKSD but i swear, i dont mean anything bad. i hope you really do have the happiest birthday despite the current situation, and i wish that only the people who truly love and deserve you surround you and remind you what a great person you are. we love you lee jeno <3

congratulations! ya'll have a baby boy (doesn’t matter if you adopted or gave birth in this case, you do you bishes)

idk about you, but taking care of babies is hard alright (speaking from experience when i had to take care of my newborn cousin for 5 months on a weekly basis). doesn’t matter if you’re a mum or a dad, you gotta sacrifice a lot of your time to make sure that the kid is well fed and cared for, and patience is a key really.

and to say that you and jeno didn’t argue quite a bit about parenting would be a lie

but like, ya’ll fought about such petty shit it’s kind of funny

‘jeno i told you to change his diaper—‘

‘______ please no i had to clean his diaper this morning and i think i lost my sense of breathing’

normally you’d be laughing, and shrug it off

but you were a tired shister. you were up all making your baby shut up in the nicest way possible of course

so you may have bursted

‘YOU LITERALLY JUST HAVE TO WIPE SHIT AND TAPE A FUCKIN DIAPER ON A CHILD LEE JENO’

again, you maY have bursted

keyword: may

and he was annoyed by it, i mean who wouldn’t. i would’ve bitch slapped you _______.

then again, we all know how loving and sweet lee jeno is

he may not show it very explicitly, but he does subtle things and does admire you for your hard work and caring nature

he always make sure to have enough diapers, toiletries, and even gets the baby clothes laid out once your bby boy your actual kid not jeno is fresh from the shower uwu

ya’ll are a lovely couple though

you cook together, clean the house, play with your son— just soft hours tbh

there was this one time where jeno placed his boy on his lap, and was gently moving his kid’s arms to the choreography of boom while the baby was just giggling and smiling

and jeno couldn’t stop smiling and giggling too

you literally have two babies in front of your being in their ultimate babie form hoW ken you knott meLt

and there was this other time when your baby just climbed up on his chest and jeno woke up only to see the brightest smile from ur son and jeno wakes you up (despite the fact that ur half dead) and it’s all so uwu

bottomline is: jeno wants to show you everything your son does and you can’t blame him for anything cause it is very cute

when your son is sleeping, jeno just comes up to you and hugs you from the back

and he doesn’t really say anything, he just embraces you as a way to say good job for basically not giving up and trying to be the best parent

and you know what he is implying, and you just lean your head on his chest, embracing the warmth

THIS IS SO FUCKING FLUFFY GOD I LOVE THIS MAN

he also finds time to pepper you with kisses cause hE can and he loves you but also cause this boi wants to remind you that he’s always going to be there for you

i swear _______ wrap him in bubble wrap he is precious

lmAOOOOO jeno simply cannot trust the dreamies to be alone with your kid

chenle laughing his ass off, renjun probably choking jisung, haechan plotting something mischievous, and jaemin most likely making the most absurd sounds—the last thing jeno wants is his son to be a mixture of all of these boys

lowkey same with you

but of course, being a goOd parent, you sort of tell jeno to trust his group mates because they really do want to be great uncles

and they are!!! just in a chaotic manner

‘chenle i told you my son doesn’t need an apple watch’

‘but hyung what if he gets lost—‘

‘HE IS 3 MONTHS OLD’

anyways,

lee jeno is a wonderful husband who rlly cares for you and your kid

and whoever does actually get to marry him is probably the luckiest person in this galaxy

well maybe second luckiest, injun is already lucky for having jeno whipped for his ass

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vicky-shitposts · 4 years

Text

my only friend, the end

17th Feb. 2021,

it's only half past midnight but i feel i could write so much about my day already. firstly, i finished the 30 day squat challenge i was doing with Phoebe and Billie. it almost killed me off and i literally collapsed at the end. i don't know if my arse is fatter or if im thinner, but i connected Phoebe because of it and that's the best prize to me; i went on minecraft for the first time in ages and all i really did was trade with a villager and add a glass floor/ceiling between the open walls of my ravine. i loved collecting the materials and it gave me something to do for two hours; i had an argument with one of my closest friends because of rape and cancel culture, all because i shared a clip of my latest song with her. ever since Marilyn Manson was exposed as an abuser, i knew that there was something coming and the day finally arrived. i've fell out with far too many people over shit like this, and i knew she would have something to say which is why i avoided it. i don't like arguments, confrontation, or losing people that are close to me. this is why I wish that i lived in a distant castle by myself; i did manage to get a payment but i know that's all gunna go south very soon. might as well start looking for places to run away to now.

half past one am, just had a shower. at the end it started to run cold and for a few moments it was strangely really nice?? i also forgot to mention that i managed to get another merit in my history assignment on slavery, and celebrated with a quorn steak meal - chips and pepper sauce in addition of course. but it's going to be about another hour at least before my hair is dry enough for me to sleep. im debating doing an all nighter and finishing off Inner Mechanism in the process. at the very least im going to watch Name Of The Doctor before i sleep, purely for my darling Walter Simeon, the face of the Great Intelligence.

half past three, listening to Punkyoungirl - Adam Ant. urge = satisfied. didn't watch Doctor Who but i hope to put my head down and be asleep by four am. my amazon parcel has been dispatched so hopefully it'll be here by lunch time and mum's bf will wake me up saying "your package is here". had to order a new phone case, and got a new film with REG as the lead.

amazon order has arrived. throughly happy with my case, it's crystal clear and a bargain for £4. currently waiting to watch How To Get Ahead In Advertising with mother, sat playing minecraft and thinking. it's Georgia's birthday today, part of me wants to message her and wish her a happy one but i don't think it'll be received well. i know she's never going to read this or care, but if it gets to you G, i really miss you and i love you too <3 can't stop thinking about my fall out last night either. i keep sending two people stupid and annoying snaps, and i want to send it to her but i know it'll either be ignored or reignite the flames. fingers crossed that something is resolved soon. oh, i also had two homemade flapjacks for lunch after i woke up. sleeping pattern is probably fucked but isn't everything right now??

my mind is RACING. just finished watching How To Get Ahead and oh boy, i could write a whole essay on it. who knew that a film made and released at the end of the 80s could stand and be so relevant today?? there's capitalist bullshit everywhere, big brother is still watching and there's a trappy little fucker lodged between my shoulder and my head. really wish the script was released as a book so i could truly divulge and rip it apart!! Richard E Grant may be a genius, but so is Bruce Robinson. i wish i could snog the first and collaborate with the latter. if Bruce's recent book wasn't so long, i would definitely look into getting it - or maybe i could read it after i finish With Nails?? tell you what, i'll look into it. currently im on my way to sainsburys in a pathetic attempt to get cheap lego set that i know won't be there; i was proved correct as they didn't have it. sigh.

#Richard E Grant #Bruce Robinson #How To Get Ahead In Advertising #diary #diary entry #aesthetic #photography #dark #contemplation #lego #sad #down #depressed #alone #run away #Doctor Who #Matt Smith #The Great Intelligence

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therainroguefanfiction · 4 years

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🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 011 [A Hero’s Style]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,490 ☁

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“It’s the very first breath, When your head’s been drowning underwater, And it’s the lightness in the air when you’re there.” Logic ft. Alessia Cara, “1-800-273-8255″〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

The door to the nurse’s office slid open and the boy with the messy green hair stepped inside. He was cradling his right hand, the index finger swollen and badly bruised. I sat up on the bed, rising a brow at him. “The fuck happened to you?”

His gaze shot up, a blush covering his freckled cheeks and nose. “A-Ah, it was n-nothing, really!”

My eyes narrowed at him. “Pretty sure a broken finger ain’t ‘nothing’, but okay.”

“W-What about you?” he asked, softly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He refused to meet my gaze. “A-Are you okay, Winchester-san?”

The door slid open again and Granny stepped inside. “Can I help you, deary? What happened?”

He handed her a slip of paper, his green eyes trained on the ground. “I, umm… I got hurt…”

“Well, I can see that.” She brought his hand to her lips and gave it a smooch before having him sit down to wrap it up. He thanked her before swaying out of the room, tiredly. She glanced over at me. “Feeling better?”

“Define ‘better’,” I scoffed, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. “I could go for some tacos, if that’s what you mean.”

“That’s the best I could hope for,” she smiled, patting my arm. “You’re free to go.”

I gave her a lazy salute before leaving the room. I stopped off to change back into my uniform before heading back to class. A couple students still lingered inside, turning to look at me when I slid the door open. Didn’t anyone ever teach these brats it’s rude to stare? I scowled, grabbing my bag from my desk before leaving the room.

“Young Jen!” A woosh of air rushed past me before Toshi appeared in front of me, his large hands on my shoulders. “I was looking for you!”

“Well, you found me. And you know where I live, so.”

“Come with me, please!”

It was a bit hard to avoid drawing attention to myself when I was being dragged along by the most attention-grabbing hero in the fucking world. He led me to a small room with a couch and coffee table, where three cups of steaming tea sat. Aizawa was sitting in an armchair with his eyes closed and arms crossed.

“Please have a seat,” Toshi held out his arm toward the couch and I plopped down on the end closest to Aizawa. He sat beside me, angling his large body, which slowly fizzled out to his skeletal form. He coughed a few times before speaking. “Will you tell me what happened today?”

“With the green-haired kid? Yeah, I was wondering about that, too. A broken finger is pretty crazy, huh?”

“Jen,” Aizawa shifted, giving me a pointed look.

I shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t fucking know. One minute I was fine, the next I’m being subdued by Magic Eraser over here.”

Toshi put his hand on my knee, giving me a kind look. “You know you don’t have to keep secrets from us. You can be honest, you can trust us, we won’t judge you. We just want to help you.”

I clicked my tongue, lifting my leg to rest my ankle on my knee to remove his hand. “That’s pretty unfair, Toshi, when you have so many secrets of your own. Trust you? That’s rich considering you won’t even trust me.”

“What are you talking about, Young J -”

“You know a shit ton more about my dear old mum than you’re willing to tell, aye?” I forced a smile, standing up and shoving my hands in my pockets. “Probably about me, too. And this damned quirk. But that’s fine. I really don’t remember anything that happened so can I go now?”

The two of them exchanged a look.

“This isn’t over,” Aizawa responded, but his voice was softer than it had been earlier.

“Sure, sure.” I waved at them over my shoulder before closing the door behind me.

As I walked home, my phone started to buzz in my pocket as a new message came through. Another a few minutes later. And another. My eye twitched, already annoyed. I swear to god if Murder is spamming me again… but I knew it could only be him. I only have three contacts in my phone – Aizawa never texts me and I knew Toshi would be giving me some space for a while before trying to talk things out.

At that moment, I was overcome by a loneliness fiercer than I had ever felt before.

‘Oi, extra’

‘Dont ignore me’

‘I want a rematch’

The hell is this kid on about now? I replied, ‘U won last time bro…’

‘Its not a win unless i destroy u completely!’

I rubbed the back of my neck, ‘Im really not in the mood for this’

‘Che what crawled up ur ass and died?’

I hesitated, stopping to look up at the sky. The blue was replaced by hues of orange and red as the sun sunk low on the horizon. We’ve only talked a few times, but I felt… a bond with Murder and, right now, he’s the closest thing to a friend that I’ve got. ‘Hey… I wanna tell u somethin’

‘Oh god i dont want ur nudes’

This fuckin’ brat… ‘I said tell not show dumbass’

‘The fuckd u just call me bitch?!’

I slid my key into the lock, stepping into the silent apartment. I kicked my shoes off, pushing them against the wall so Toshi wouldn’t trip when he finally returned home. Falling onto the couch, another message came through.

‘Well r u gonna tell me or nah’

I smiled, sadly and began to tell him my story. I told him about how I got here and about the shadow man with his weird-ass warp quirk, about Gramps and how my mother was apparently a hero. I left out names and key details, of course, but I told him mostly everything that had happened over the past year. He would chime in with some smart ass remark every now and then, but I ignored them and continued to pour my heart out to this guy I had only just met a few days ago.

It felt so goddamn nice to get everything off my chest. It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

That night, I slept better than I had since I arrived here.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“I am… HERE!” The door to class 1-A slammed open and Toshi leaned into the room, standing on his tiptoes and holding the outside of the doorframe. “Coming through the door like a hero!”

If that’s how heroes make an entrance, count me out. It seemed to impress the other students, though, as a murmur of excitement filled the room. God, these kids are too easily amused.

“I can’t believe it’s really All Might!”

“So he is a teacher! This year is going to be totally awesome!”

“Hey look, is he wearing his silver age costume?”

“I’m getting goosebumps, it’s so retro!”

I fell onto my desk with a sigh. It’s like a bunch of little kids meeting Santa at the mall. I guess I could kind of understand it if he had powers but they didn’t, but they do. They’re no different from him, they’re just younger. I was thankful to be sitting behind Big Boobs – between her tall frame and gravity-defying hair, I was completely hidden from Toshi’s line of sight. We hadn’t talked since yesterday. I was asleep by the time he came home, and he was gone before I woke up.

“Welcome to the most important class at U.A. High – think of it was heroing 101!”

I don’t think ‘heroing’ is a word. Or is it? Scratching my cheek, I pulled out my phone, hiding it under my desk as I typed the word into the Goggle. Oh my god, the first result that comes up says the word ‘heroing’ means the opposite of being a hero! There’s also a mention of something about heroines. I scoff, earning a glare from the Peppermint that sits beside Big Boobs.

“Here, you will learn the basics of being a pro! And what it means to fight in the name of good. Let’s get into it! Today’s lesson, we’ll pull no punches!” He held out a card that said ‘battle’ in large, bold letters.

“Fight training!”

“But one of the keys of being a hero is~” Toshi pointed to the left wall as thin shelves emerged from it, holding numbered cases. “Looking good! There were designed for you based on your quirk registration forms and the request you sent in before school started. Get yourself suited up and then meet me at training ground beta!”

“Yes, sir!”

I waited until he left the room before standing up and grabbing case number twenty-one, following the throng of students as they rushed to the locker rooms to get changed. I went to the back of the room, hoping to avoid the other girls before sliding my shirt off.

“Woah, you have a tattoo? That’s so cool!”

I glanced over at the Punk Girl, earphone jacks hanging from her ear lobes. I grunted in response, turning my back to her. She muttered something about being rude before walking away from me. I glanced over my ‘costume’ before grunting in approval. Honestly, I had expected them to fuck it up, especially since Midnight didn’t approve of it, but I was surprised that they had kept it just as specified.

Black, steel-toe combat boots accompanying black baggy cargo pants with plenty of pockets for knives. A black belt with a silver skull buckle. A white wife beater, over which was a white overshirt, the sleeves stopping just past my elbows. I glanced in the mirror, putting my pendant under the tanktop before tucking the front of it behind the belt buckle. Damn, I really like this look.

I stepped out of the locker room ahead of most of the girls, seeing a few guys leaning against the wall outside, waiting. Fumi was among them, dressed in a black cloak that completely covered his body. He glanced at me when I approached, red eyes scanning my body.

“You look nice, Winchester-san.” He said, politely.

I chuckled. “You can use my first name, it’s easier. And you don’t look so bad yourself, Fumi.”

“Fumi?” he mused, following in step beside me as we headed down the hall.

“Don’t like it?” I asked, glancing at him.

“I don’t particularly mind,”

I hummed.

As the group reached the end of the long hallway, I could hear Toshi’s booming voice before I saw him.

“They say that clothes make the pros, young ladies and gentlemen. And behold – you are the proof! Take this to heart, from now on, you are all heroes in training!” His shadowed eyes scanned the crowd. “This is getting me all revved up! You look so cool! Now, shall we get started, you bunch of newbies?”

My eye twitched. Who the fuck is he callin’ a ‘newbie’? Didn’t that insult die like five years ago? We’ve talked about this, man, don’t try to be hip, you’re just gonna embarrass yourself, bro. I sighed, shaking my head. This is gonna be a long-ass day.

Footsteps came from the tunnel and I glanced over my shoulder. Is that… a green bunny? No, no, no, there’s something familiar about that costume, but what is it? Ugh, this is gonna bug me.

“Now that you’re ready, it’s time for combat training!”

“Sir!” Prep was encased in a suit of armor. “This is the fake city from our entrance exam. Does that mean we will be conducting urban battles again?”

“Not quite!” Toshi held up two fingers and at first, I thought he was flashing us the peace sign. “I’m going to move you two steps ahead! Most of the villain fights you see on the news take place outside. However, statistically speaking, run-ins with the most dastardly evil-doers take place indoors. Think about it! Backroom deals. Home invasions. Secret underground lairs. Truly intelligent criminals stay hidden in the shadows. For this training exercise, you’ll be split into teams of good guys and bad guys, and fight two on two indoor battles!”

Good guys and bad guys? That’s such a gray area, ain’t it? I leaned my arm on Fumi’s shoulder, scratching my cheek. Is anyone truly ‘good’ or ‘bad’, really?

“Isn’t this a little advanced?” Frog-girl asked.

“The best training is what you get on the battlefield! But, remember, you can’t just punch a robot this time. You’re dealing with actual people now.”

Actual people, huh? Should I avoid using my quirk? If I lose control again, there’s no Aizawa around to stop me. Someone could get seriously hurt or… I shook my head. Come on, don’t think that way. Just take a deep breath, you got this.

“Sir, will you be the one deciding who wins?” Probably.

“How much can we hurt the other team?” How villainous.

“Do we need to worry about the losers getting expelled liked earlier?” No, ’cause Toshi ain’t Aizawa.

“Will you be splitting us up based on chance or comparative skill?” Should be obvious it’s gonna be random.

“Isn’t this cape pre chic?” What the fuck is wrong with you, French Fry?

I sweatdropped. These guys are really fucking nuts, aren’t they?

Toshi held his head back, his voice strangled. “I wasn’t finished talking…” He reached into his costume, which I didn’t know had pockets, and pulled out a small notebook about the size of his palm, flipping it open as he held each side with one hand. “Listen up!”

Oh my fucking god, he wrote a script for this? “This class is a hot fucking mess…”

“The situation is this: The villains have hidden a nuclear missile somewhere in their hideout. The heroes must try to foil their plans. To do that, the good guys either have to catch the evildoers or recover the weapon. Likewise, the bad guys succeed if they protect their payload or capture the heroes. Time is limited and we’ll choose teams by drawing lots!” He held up a bright, yellow box.

“Isn’t there a better way?” Prep asked.

“Think about it,” Green Bunny responded from beside him, holding up a gloved finger. “Pros often have to team up with heroes from other agencies on the spot. So maybe that’s the reason we’re seeing that here!”

“Yes, I see. Life is a random series of events… Excuse my rudeness!”

I should really learn these guy’s names, but how can I do that without actually having to interact with them? I wonder if Aizawa or Tosh would let me see the student files… that seems pretty doubtful. Plus, Tosh hasn’t looked at me once so he’s probably still upset with me.

“No sweat! Let’s draw!”

Yup, this is definitely going to be a long-ass fucking day.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

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vampqueersarchive · 4 years

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In a World Uncertain, Say You’ll be my Stone

Okay this is a original fic by me im sorry if its shit i was listening to an Alessia Cara song when I wrote this and used Troye songs in this as well idk its cute and i love it

Rating: G Word count: 4,427 Warnings: Accidental outing Summary: Freddie a makeup youtuber and his best friend Reese a singer decide to fake date after Freddie accidentally outs himself aka FRIENDS TO BOYFRIENDS (This is straight up fluff yo!)

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An annoying buzz was the first thing Freddie heard, a buzz he wanted to stop. Turning over with a groan he pulled his phone to his face, seeing his sister Katherine's name blinking across the too-bright screen. With weak still slow from sleep hands he finally answered with a sigh. "Hello-" He started voice gruff from just waking up. "You have got some explaining to do Mr." Katherine started in a soft, yet demanding tone. "Mum is going to kill you!" "Kat, the love of my life, Mum can kill me later, it's too early." He mumbled sleepily turning his face into the plush pillow. "Freddie, you're on the front page of every magazine, they caught you kissing Hayden." At that moment Freddie felt everything well up in his throat, suddenly all the drinks he had the night before had turned against him. He felt moments away from crying but also getting sick. "No..." he trailed off, "It can't be." he half-whispered to himself and his sister. "Kat, tell mum I'll call later." without letting her reply, he hung up his almost dead iPhone and did what he couldn't do on the phone. Freddie let himself cry, he couldn't believe he let himself get so absorbed into the night before. He could not believe he did what he promised himself he would never do until he felt that the time was right.

Freddie Barnes outed himself.

It wasn’t the fact that Freddie wanted to stay in the closet or the fact that he didn’t feel comfortable being himself. Hell no! That wasn’t Freddie, as most of Freddie's friends could attest to Bi Pride day he wore pink, lavender and blue as if his life depended on it. People. Biphobic people, homophobic people, transphobic, aphobic, nonbinaryphobic people were the ones he couldn’t handle. As strong as Freddie was he couldn’t handle all the hate that would be directed to him. Freddie knew the feeling all too well, back in Doncaster when he came out and all of his friends left him abandoned. Then a few years ago when his best friend came out and the internet flooded with so much love, but love is always drowned out by the unbearable hate. “Hayden,” Freddie spoke in a small brittle voice. Hayden Sanders his best friend who had to deal with all this hate long before, now getting even more all because of a drunken truth or dare game. All because of me Freddie thought to himself, It’s all your fault. Before Freddie could get any more down on himself a soft knock came from the other side of his door. “Come in” he softly spoke trying not to give the person an indication that he had been crying for the better part of an hour. Hayden slowly stepped through the door, looking about as rough as Freddie did. His long curls in an unruly heap that was meant to be a bun. Tear stain’s running from the waterline of his lashes, in long unforgiving streaks down to his chin. His clothes a wrinkled mess, still in the same outfit from the previous night. And worst of all he refused to meet Freddie gaze. “Hayden please look at me.” Freddie pleaded, his wobbly voice betraying him. However, Hayden still would not look into his eyes, he shuffled across the room towards Freddie bed taking Freddie tight in his arms and releasing the sobs Hayden tried so hard to keep in. This sent Freddie reeling, only tangling his fingers into Hayden’s lilac jumper, sending the tears he tried to hold back down his cheeks. “I’m so sorry Fredd.” Hayden whispered in his thick low voice. “I am so sorry.” Either of them could say any words, they only curled closer into the embrace. ~ It felt as though days past when Freddie woke up to the sound of glass clacking together. Sleepily rubbing the sleep from his eyes, pulling himself out of his large round bed and going to look for Hayden. With each step on the cold hardwood floor, Freddie remembered the hours before. The call from Katherine, another step Outing himself, another step Hayden coming crying, another step After being hit with a repeat of everything Freddie quickly made his way to his small kitchen, only to be face to face with Hayden. Hayden wasn’t himself, his usual bright cheeky smile reached his eyes. But now his eyes were dull, and his smile was just a fake one. As if he was trying to be strong for the both of them. “I made you tea, no milk like you like it,” Hayden said sliding a cup towards Freddie, placing his hands on the small island in the middle of the kitchen. “Freddie, I am so sorry. I can fix this I swear.” He pleaded, his smile faltering as his voice choked with the urge to cry. A few tetras weld up in Freddie's eyes only for him to shake his head. “H, there’s nothing you can do. What’s done is done. It was bound to happen at some point.” He shrugged, opening his arm nodding at his best friend to come in for a cuddle. “Now, all those fanfics of us will double, who knows maybe we’ll be some uni students looking for a new year’s kiss,” Freddie smirked as he sipped on his tea, causing Hayden to groan in response. “I didn’t even think of all the people that ship us. It’s rather cute though don’t you think.” Hayden mused, wrapping his arm around the small of Freddie back, making them connect seamlessly as they always do. Freddie giggled nodding, “I quite like the ones where we fake date each other to be honest. But that’s off the record Sanders.” The stern voice only to be compromised by the joyful expression, sending crinkles up to his eyes. A pleasant silence consumed the two of them before the elephant in the room became too much to bear. “Why don’t I call the lads?” Hayden suggested, looking at the wobble of Freddie's lip. “Please?” ~ Hours later and a distraction of pizza and makeovers lefts Freddie feeling better, that was until he decided to check his phone. As soon as he plugged in his rose gold iPhone, he went about his usual routine and clicked on twitter. As the app loaded Freddie nerves kicked in, dropping his phone to the ground causing Hayden, Ashton, and Liam to jump in their seats. As if in an instant, the boys were all wrapped tightly around Freddie, whispering sweet compliments into his hair. This went on until Freddie was finally calmed enough and stopped crying, mumbling a soft thank you in return. “Lads,” Hayden spoke up only nodding his head before it was just Freddie and Hayden in the room. “Freddie, I have an idea.” At this moment Freddie was up for any idea, that even included running through the streets of London with a bi-colored suit that read out “Freddie Barnes Is Bi” in big glittery letters. “Freddie I think we should fake date.” “Fake date?!?” Freddie screeched. “Hayden you have got to be kidding me, you finally got over all this hate about you being pan. You can finally kiss whoever you want in your videos without being bombarded with hate. Why would you do that?” Freddie whispered, looking down at his lap in defeat. “Fredd, I know how it feels going through this alone. I know how scary it can be, Freddie I don’t want my best friend to ever feel the same thing I did. Please let me help you for once.” Racking his brain with every negative outcome that could happen, Freddie suddenly was met with the widest pair of bright green eyes he had ever seen. At that moment Freddie knew all of his hindsight went out the window. “Okay, Hayden.” - It took Freddie a 30 minute laughing fit, followed by incoherent whispers of “I’m going to pretend to date my best friend” before anyone started to worry. Liam tried to help by bringing Freddie out some tea with lavender, to calm his nerves. While all the laughing made Ashton anxious and thus started to laugh too, causing Hayden to have to take a video of Ashton’s full out hollowing. When Liam finally came back in and connived Freddie to drink the tea, the room became far more relaxed. “So, someone please fill us in on what just caused all of that?” Ashton sounded horse from the laughing fit he just put himself through. “Hayden asked Freddie to fake date him,” Liam replied simply as Hayden nodded next to him. As soon as Liam spoke the hot tea came full force back out of Freddie's mouth in a spit take, sending him into a coughing fit. “Wait you knew?” Freddie coughed out. Liam just shrugged taking a sip of the tea he made for himself. “Who do you think gave him the idea? Look, Barnes, before you get all upset it’s better for the both of you. Coming at this purely from a pr standpoint, you can come out, be happy about your self, Hayden can spend more time with you, and either of you have to deal with any of the hate alone.” Ashton nodded, “Plus that means we can finally tweet about all the adorable shite you two do before you started to date.” He chipped in adding air quotes around ‘date’. “Fredd,” Hayden stated, “It’s the least I can do for you, and you have already done so much for me.” It took Freddie sometimes to think over it before he finally managed to agree. “So what’s our plan?” ~ Freddie knew exactly how this was going to go down, a simple coffee date, a few pap pictures, they hold hands news hits the stands, and then Freddie makes his coming out video. Even though having it all written down on paper helped, it also really didn’t. Things weren’t that simple. Freddie knew if they didn’t make this look believable enough it could all come shattering down around them. His nerves were in high gear making it almost impossible to even fill his brows properly much less try to do a flawless winged eyeliner. Holding up his rose lip liner from NYX he noticed his hands shaking making him even more nervous for the day. Adding his pink macaroon butter gloss, and then adding subtle glittered highlighter Freddie knew he was going to do this. And he was going to be the best fake boyfriend anyone could ever be. Well, that was until Freddie arrived at the coffee place. It was a small hole in the wall place that of course, Hayden would pick out. It looked like a try-hard hipster place that just didn’t feel right, maybe it was the deception he was about to do, or just the place itself but Freddie wasn’t sure about the plan any longer. As if on cue Hayden was right next to him, smiling his wide dimpled grin that melted the heart of everyone Hayden met, and Freddie could not be any more thankful for it at that moment. “H, what if we can’t do this?” Freddie whispered, trying to make sure that his fear didn’t lace his voice. Hayden only grinned wider in response, “I got you, I’ll keep you afloat.” Freddie felt his nerves melt instantly. His hands were no longer shaking, his racing heart slowly coming down to a soft tempo and everything clicking into place. - The date went much the same as any other time Freddie and Hayden are together, at least one picture of the other doing something silly, tons of banter and a few compliments (but of course Freddie still had to make at least one jab, now that Hayden is famous he doesn’t need an ego), and of course plenty of platonic kissing and cuddles. Now it felt so much more forced, causing Freddie to shy away every time Hayden’s hand lingered a bit too long. “Fredd,” Hayden spoke up trying to distract him from any negativity he may be having. “It’s just me it’s okay.” He tried to console only to make Freddie shy away more. “H, it just doesn’t feel right, it’s not for us anymore it’s for everyone.” Hayden could only frown in response as the waitress came to pick up their empty cups, “I’m sorry to intrude,” she started, a thick welsh accent rolling off her tongue “Would you mind if I get a picture?” The pair looked towards each other only to be interrupted by her laughing. “No with me silly, the two of you blokes. Hayden, I’ve been listening to your stuff forever, and Freddie you are just so sweet. The both of you just make me so happy, I kinda just want to see you two the same way.” They both agreed to get up from their seats cuddling close to each other for the picture, as she took the photo Freddie looked over and seen what she meant. Hayden looked so happy to be with Freddie, his eyes light up more than the stars in the night sky. Freddie wanted to name one for Hayden at that moment, but his thought was broken when Hayden asked she send the picture to him on twitter. Freddie knew at that moment everything was going to be fine. - “Fredd,” Hayden hummed out, as they walked out hand in hand into the chilled autumn air of London. Freddie only made a nose in return nuzzling his face into the sleeve of the brown leather jack Hayden sported. The conversation, however, was abruptly halted by the sounds of the camera’s clicking, and whispers of the people behind them. Freddie could only sigh in response before he smiled up at Hayden. “Come on, Boo lets give them something to take a picture of.” Before Freddie could comprehend what was happening, Hayden had to take Freddie and twirled him around, both of them giggling and squealing with delight as their two bodies left almost no space between them. There was a clear crimson blush lining both of there cheeks as another snap went off. Maybe they could do this. ~ The next day Freddie woke up to another annoying buzz of his phone, of course, he knew exactly who it was this time. Hayden's contact name popped up on the screen, Freddie couldn't help but smile and feel so much love when he saw it. “Hel-” He was cut off by screaming in the background from none other than Ashton. “Boo,” Hayden whined into the phone. “They released the pictures and Ashton won't believe me that we aren't dating.” Even though the phone Freddie could tell he was pouting. The usual Hayden pout where he tried to look all angry yet sad, and end up just looking like an oversized toddler. “Put the wanker on the phone,” Freddie giggled rolling his eyes. The phone switched over and a very excited scream erupted through the phone. “Holy shit, Ash can you be even more excited for a little fake relationship.” “Fredd you can't lie to me. I got those Irish instincts and you lot are lying.” Ashton huffed out in pride. Freddie could only smirk at the wildness of his friend. “Yeah, yeah Mr. Ireland. Give the phone back to curls now will ya.” “Give the phone back to curls! Now that's going on twitter.” Ashton shouted as the phone was handed back to Hayden. “Boo I thought you said you were going to fix this,” Hayden said in a mock sad tone. “But it's Ash, what will ya do?” Hayden chuckled out his thick voice spoke in a slow soothing hum, sending a pleasant wave of warm down Freddie's spine. Freddie nodded humming in response before he realized why Hayden called in the first place. “Did the pictures turn out well?” “Fredd don't worry everyone is talking about them, I'm pretty sure Frayden is trending on twitter right now. But I was meaning to ask you something?” “And what would that be the love of my life?” “Hah ha very funny Fredd, but Liam thought it would be a good idea if we did more stuff together. Ya know after you make your coming out video.” That hadn't even crossed Freddie's mind having to make that video, the video where he couldn't turn back. The video where he had to lie and say his best friend was the person he was dating. “Yea,” he whispered into the phone. “Hayden can you be there when I record the video, please I need it.” “You don't have to ask Fredd, you're my best friend. Our friendship comes first.” A smile spread across Freddie's cheeks sending crinkles to the corner of his bright blue eyes. “Come over tomorrow okay?” - Freddie spends the day procrastinating, usually, that meant going on twitter but that was the last place he even wanted to look at. Instead, he decided to do something big tomorrow. He was going to do a coming outlook. Putting on his old vans and a pink knitted beanie he went to the closest drug store and found everything he needed from NYX. Picking up white eyeliner, the ultimate shadow palette, and the matte lip cream in soule, Moscow, and Paris. As he headed for the check out a young boy came up to him and hugged him without any warning. “Hi, Freddie!” The young boy chirped in excitement, “My mum is letting me get makeup thanks to you!” The boy smiled his whole face lighting up. Freddie couldn't hold back the pride he felt in helping this little boy become confident and feel okay to wear makeup. “That's amazing little lad, make sure to-” Freddie was cut off by the little boy finishing his line “Get Nyx because Nyx is best!” the boy smiled hugging Freddie one last time before he went off to get his make up. Knowing by just having his makeup channel he made that much of a difference he knew coming out could only make an even better one. ~ “Thanks for watching everyone and I'll see you next time.” Freddie smiled huffing a sigh as soon as Hayden turned off the camera. “Fredd that was amazing you did so well.” Hayden grinned opening his arms pulling Freddie into a tight hug. “But I hope you realize you're gonna have to do a pan look for the next pride.” “Nahh, you can watch the tutorial.” Freddie giggled pulling away from the hug, finally getting to look in the mirror without so much anxiety running through him. Freddie felt amazing, light pink and purple on his upper lid, flowed into a blue making his eye pop and a white-winged linger flicking out to a dramatic curve. His lips mimicking the bi flag and the sliver and purple glitter lining his cheeks. He then looked up behind him where Hayden was sanding smiling at his best friend with so much pride. “Thank you for being here, H.” “Anything for you Boo,” Hayden said his thick warm voice filling the room. “Liam wanted me to talk to you about something though.” Freddie's mood dropped instantly thinking that he would have to go through his alone. All of his fears welling upon his face as Hayden looked back over to Freddie with a frown. “Fredd, no don't worry. It's nothing bad I promise.” He said taking Freddie's hand and leading him to sit on the bed. “He said we should try kissing in front of the paps, or even when we film one of the videos or when you come to my concert with in the next two months..” He trailed off slowly toning his voice into a mumble. Freddie didn't really know how to respond. He gently squeezed Hayden's hand to try and clam him a bit. “Liam wants to make it look natural?” Freddie asked tracing his finger along the lines of Hayden's anchor. Hayden could only blush and nod, “Um... Yea.” “Well let's practice.” Freddie leaned in first, tipping his head slightly to the left as Hayden leaned to the right. They both fluttered closed, as their lips connected in what Freddie felt like a spark. Freddie hands trailed up and tangled his fingers into the ends of his curls. Hayden moved his arms to wrap around Freddie's waist. The feeling of safety and love spread throughout Freddie traveling to his fingertips. His fingers felt like sparks as he tried to pull Hayden closer when their lips worked together in what felt like a perfectly tuned orchestra playing in a beautiful symphony. To Freddie, the world felt as if the world stood still until the moment they pulled apart. The pulled apart blinking at each other in a form of shock and content, giggling like school kids who kissed their crush out in the schoolyard. A blush spread across Hayden's cheeks only causing Freddie to smile wider. “Come on, Romeo” Freddie started. “Let's film our first video.” ~ The first month went by with ease for the most part. The fans and paps loved their chemistry. They became the most talked about couple in all of 2016 Kimaye be damned. The fans loved when the two of them started to live stream, and even when Hayden made Freddie sing one of his songs. (The hashtag Frayden Sing Youth trended for almost two days.) However, with all the love came hate. Many people would come on Freddie channel and just say he was using Hayden for fame. Others would send biphobic messages to Hayden over Freddie only to get blocked in return. But for the most part, they were accepted. Ashton wasn't helping on the casual dating front though. Every time the lads were together Ashton would tweet something cute they said or even post a picture. Ashton convinced their fans at one point they were living together and adopted a kitten when he posted a picture of Freddie kissing Hayden's cheek as Hayden held up a small sphynx kitten in his hand. In all everything was starting to become Freddie life. Every Tuesday film two videos of his own and maybe one with Hayden. Wednesday was their best friend breakfast date that over the last month turned into a fake dating date. And on the weekends Freddie helped Hayden filming for his new music video series. And today was finally the release of Wild and also the day of the concert. In all Freddie felt a bubble of excitement well up. To celebrate the event Freddie and Hayden were going to do a live stream of them dying their hair matching colors before the event. It was 10 o'clock and Hayden still wasn't there. The hour soon changed over and Hayden still wasn't there. Freddie didn't know what to feel, he tried calling and it was straight to voice mail, he tried texting and no response. It was only 3 hours until the video premiere so Freddie texted once more before starting the live stream. The stream ended as the video went up and Freddie couldn't be more stressed. He kept running his hands through his new bubble gum pink hair as he refreshed his phone waiting and hoping for Hayden. But no call no text, he got nothing from Hayden. That's when the night came crashing in when Freddie got a text from Liam saying “Hayden's sorry.” - Day's went by and there was still no message from Hayden, everyone was tweeting asking when the next live stream would be, or even asking if the two of them were okay. It took a full week before Freddie shut down on himself. Every time he looked in the mirror and saw pink it made him want to shave his head. When he saw the tattoos, he had to pull on a sweater before he would start to cry. One drunken night Freddie could not hold back his feelings anymore, so he called Ashton. “Fredd, hey are you okay?” Ashton's voice seemed just weak as Freddie did until he realized it was 3 am. “Ash, I made my best friend hate me, he won't even talk to me anymore. Why did I do this? Why did I say yes to him.” Freddie sobbed before his words became incoherent. The other end of the line was quite before Freddie whispered in a wrecked voice from crying, “Ashton?” “Barnes,” Ashton started. “H fell in love with you.” ~ Freddie woke up again the same way he woke up two months prior. His phone buzzing but this time it was Hayden. Freddie picked up but he couldn't talk he felt so weak like he couldn't. “Fredd,” Hayden whispered in a soft rough voice from what sounded to be crying. “Can I come in?” “Of course.” and with that, Freddie heard his front door unlock as Hayden made his way into the room. Freddie met him there opening the door and let him in. “So,” Hayden looked town paying with the hem of his pullover. “I guess the cats out of the bag.” Freddie laughed only going back to the stony expression he started with. “Don't you dare make me laugh Sanders I'm still mad at you.” the room went silent as Hayden looked up to meet Freddie's eyes. “Why didn't you tell me?” “Because, why would you love me back? You're Freddie Barnes, you are perfect and amazing, and my best friend. I never meant for it to get this far.” He said voice wobbling try to hold back his tears. “H, you're always going to be my friend, but-” “No Boo, don't 'but' me” Hayden pleaded but before he could get any more out Freddie pulled him into a kiss. “You're always going to be my friend first, and my boyfriend second.” - The two stayed intertwined for the next few hours, nothing could get in between them. They felt content in each other's arms as they talked about nothing and play with each other makeup. The two of them feeling so happy and comfortable with each other they knew it had to be fiat. It was days later when they finally deiced to post a picture. Hours before Hayden finally dyed his hair and they thought it would be the best time to show it off. The picture was posed with Freddie's pink hair and Hayden's soft mint hair as they sat cross-legged holding hands while they kissed then captioned it “Friends before anything else.”

~Fin~

#screaming #i am having a name crisis rn so no name #my writing #original work #original fiction #writing #writingblr #authors on tumblr #authors

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hillybargrove · 6 years

Text

New Years

Roger Taylor x Reader

Summary: rogers scared to crush on y/n because she’s deaky’s sister but we all know how well that’s gonna work out for him

Word Count: slightly over 2k :)

A/N: it’s january 16th which makes this less fun but i think it’s good and im really happy with how it turned out!!

When you had first been introduced to the band, they we're already working on their fourth album. Your brother had done his best to avoid introducing you for almost five years, afraid of you taking a liking to one of his friends.

It was barely August when John gave you a call from their studio in Rockfield, asking you to come out and see him.

"Y/N?"

"John?"

"Haven't seen you in a while, how's mum?" You talked for a half hour catching up before he invited you to visit.

"Why, John? You need someone who actually knows how to do laundry?" He couldn't ever remember to separate the lights from the darks, frequently he also forgot the importance of detergent.

"Can't I just miss my baby sister?"

"Well, that almost never happens, John." You agreed, however, and packed a bag so you could stay for a night.

When you pulled in, you saw where they were staying, and how it was in fact a farmhouse. Chickens loitered the dirt road, perching on fences and cooing at some blond. You parked, saw John in your peripheral vision and threw open the car door as fast as you could to run to him.

"Hey!" You said, already airborne and jumping onto his back. There was a thud, your brother was unsuspecting and now on the ground covered in dust and probably a few bruises.

"I'm never calling you again."

"Don't be so dramatic."

The man with the chickens had laughed at the mercy of his friend, gaining your attention when you picked yourself up.

"Hi," You called out, brushing off your jeans. "Sorry about that, sibling rivalry and all."

"Fine by me," he waved you off. "John needs a bit of roughing up." Your brother made it off the dirt himself, shooting both you and the blond a look. From the right you heard footsteps approach the two of you.

"Roger, would you quit mucking around with the chickens and get in here, Freddie needs you for the operatics." Brian, as you'd remembered from pictures, had curly black hair and seemed to tower over everyone around.

"Brian and Roger meet my sister." They both gave small, awkward waves when he failed to give them your name.

"I'm Y/N, sorry. I guess he doesn't remember." You jerked your head at your brother and shot him a dirty look. "D'you forget my name or something?" His friends let out a chuckle and John now gave you a mean expression.

"Give me a minute, it's on the tip of my tongue." You dug your fingers into his sides, drawing out a painful laughter before he cried for you to stop.

"Well, it's nice to finally get the chance to meet you guys," You said, taking a step to shake their hands.

"Likewise," Brian smiled, "I'd love to stay and chat but I've got to get him in there before the bill for this album goes up any higher."

You didn't quite recognize Roger, at least not in a fur coat and a pair of dark sunglasses, but Brian immediately dragged him away from the farm animals and into the studio.

"Uh, John?" You looked at him with amusement, "you didn't tell me your band mates were hot."

"There's a reason for that."

"You've been cock-blocking me for years."

"Shut it."

•••

You had the pleasure of seeing Roger in the recording studio in the middle of his galileo's. It was incredibly tempting to laugh, but everybody else seemed annoyed he couldn't get as high as Freddie wanted.

He did his best not to look at you for too long, but there were more times than you could count that you two caught each other staring.

He also did his best at keeping away from you. Suddenly, he was always the first one up, he made the first pot of coffee in the morning and kept to himself. You hadn't known him before, but there was enough talk about it between the boys for you to know it wasn't normal.

One afternoon you offered to grab everyone lunch from a pub in town, Roger left his order on a postcard and spent the entire day holed up in his room, despite being needed in the studio.

More and more you came to stay with them, choosing the little farmhouse over college parties and pubs, and the boys loved having you around. You broke up the testosterone in the house and always made the bathroom smell like flowers. Your visits, however, revealed the pattern in Roger's strange mood swings.

Freddie noticed it at first, and pointed it out to John who then told Brian. Your brother made nothing of it, and left the two of them to talk to you about the situation.

"Y/N?" Brian turned down the music from the car radio, you two were on your way home from the grocery store.

You gave a muffled response, having had a few chips in your mouth.

"I don't mean to pry, and you don't have to answer, but–" He paused in the awkwardness, "did something happen? Between you and Roger?"

You nearly choked, "Oh my God, Brian," You sent him a look from the passenger seat, "No, definitely no." He didn't seem to like that answer, the wrinkles between his eyebrows told you so.

"Why? Did he say something?" A small rise of panic began in your throat, "Bri, I swear–"

"No! No, he didn't say anything. The boys and I have just taken a little notice of something is all." He let a few seconds pass before beginning again, "He just seems to be very quiet when your in town, stays in his room a lot, never sleeps in, and he doesn't really like to eat with us, you know?"

"Oh, okay. I mean, I don't know. I've only ever known him to be like that. Do you think something's wrong?"

"Well–"

"Wait, so you thought it was because of me?" He came to a red stoplight and turned to look at you.

"No, not at all. Well, okay maybe." His eyes grew bigger, "Not in a bad way! Of course not anything like that, he's just been so weird, and it's only when you're around. So we all kind of assumed–"

"–Cause we hooked up and it ended weird?"

"Not in so many words, but, yeah." The car lurched forward through the intersection. "But you said nothing happened."

"Nothing, yeah. Sorry, I wish I could be more help."

"S'alright, love. Just means now I've got to actually ask him what his problem is."

He told you he'd find out and let you know, but he'd make sure to ask after you went home, which was the next day.

You didn't go back for a while after that, not because of Roger, but because school was a bit more intense after midterms and your mom had started holiday baking in the middle of November.

A week before the month was over, John and the rest of them ended up stopping by on the way to a 'band event' is what they called it.

While you were coming out of the bathroom you heard voices, Freddie and Roger.

"What's your problem, Rog? We're in her bloody house and you can't even make eye contact with her, it's weird."

"Fred, Brian already pestered me about this weeks ago–"

"And he was given a vague answer, you're being rude, it's ridiculous. What's wrong with you?" Dishes clinked around in the sink, your mother walked past you into the kitchen with the leftover peas on a platter and walked back out.

"She's John's sister, okay? That's the issue." Freddie blinked.

"And?"

"She's his sister. I mean, that's off limits, it's gotta be."

"Oh." Freddie paused from washing the dishes, "Well now it all makes sense. So you like her, then?"

"Yeah."

"Well, that's sweet, Rog, but it's not an excuse to be a dick."

Roger shook his head and started wrapping the chicken up with tin foil, "Trust me, I know."

You decided it was best not to go into the kitchen at that moment, instead returning to the table with noticeably red cheeks. To make matters worse, John tapped your shoulder and let you know they were staying the night.

"Are there even enough beds?" He shook his head no. "Then where are they all sleeping?"

Turns out you were sleeping on the couch, despite your complaints. John was in his room with Brian, which left your bed for Roger and Freddie.

•••

It was now almost half past one in the morning, everyone had been asleep for a while. The wine was catching up with you a second time, and you woke up in the middle of the night having to pee.

Groggily, you made your way inside and shut the door. A few minutes later, Roger felt the same pressure on his stomach and slid out from under Freddie's arm draped across him.

A yellow glare fell on the floor outside the bathroom, Roger, slightly drunk and very sleepy, assumed someone left the light on.

"Shit, sorry." The image of a girl in the bathroom made him jump, "I didn't realize anyone else was up."

"S'okay, I'm just washing my hands." You dried them and stepped out, "the door doesn't have a lock."

"I see." He rubbed his eyes and avoided making eye contact with you out of embarrassment, he suddenly felt self-conscious about being shirtless.

"Y'might want to think about knocking next time, though." You diverted your gaze downward, but your eyes lingered on his bare torso.

"Yeah, I'll make a note of that." He blushed and stepped aside for you to get past. He was almost grateful you were only just washing your hands, seeing you half naked in this situation would've been mortifying.

"Night, Roger." You disappeared from his vision around the corner to the living room.

"Night," He said, standing there for a moment before going inside the bathroom.

•••

It wasn't meant to be a big thing, just a few guys in a pub with family and friends to celebrate the new year. Freddie, however, turned his nose up at that idea and threw a party of his own.

Earlier throughout the night, you were given various drinks, mostly champagne. John did his best to keep you from taking too much, lucky for you.

"Just keeping an eye out for my baby sister," He would say, before you stuck your tongue out in protest.

The entire time knowing him, Roger had been skittish around you, for reasons you now knew. Tonight, however, he was different.

Drink after drink on his part, he warmed up to you. Brian even took notice and gave u a thumbs up when he saw the two of you talking. It wasn't about much, and it was kind of awkward, but watching his baby blue eyes glaze over underneath the yellow light of the chandelier made you feel something.

Even later in the evening, he tried to flirt. You then caught Freddie giving Roger a thumbs up like Brian had done to you.

It was charming, watching him across the room throw his head back to laugh, and he always watched you back.

Then midnight came, and with everyone gathered outside on the second story patio, he tapped your shoulder a minute before twelve.

"Roger?"

"I've got something to say to you." He was meant to continue, but your interest in other matters made him clam up.

"Where's your date?"

"Didn't bring one," He stated plainly.

"What about that brunette I saw following you around inside?" You crossed your arms over your chest and smiled.

"M'not terribly interested, I've got this thing for someone else." He said it with a lopsided smile, and you suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to kiss him.

"You've got about ten seconds to find someone, then."

"But I've already found you." It was almost innocent when the words tumbled out of his mouth, like a school boy with a crush.

"You know," You paused, the clock was ticking, "we've barely spoken, and I've only known you for a few months."

"My deepest apologies, love." His fingers found themselves in the loops of your jeans, and you watched those baby blue eyes until you could see the whites tinged red and all of a sudden people were celebrating.

Your lips were on his for a few seconds and it was soft and sweet. Then, his hands found their way around you, and it almost felt like the fireworks were for the two of you instead of New Year's Day.

#roger taylor #roger taylor x reader #queen #bohemian rhapsody #ben hardy #ben hardy x reader #roger taylor fic #roger taylor imagine #new year #im trying to get this guy SEEN but i can't think of any other tags #this is going well #roger x reader #hillybargrovefic

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theintovertedextovert · 6 years

Text

Ressurgimento da África

Good morning, or Afternoon from where I am. Evening to some. I am currently watching Trevor Noah's "That's Racist", great Stand up by the way. For an African.

Yes I went there.

I say that because, like A few others, he's been able to share and flow the African jokes and experiences to an all round audience. Hard for Kenyan "comedians" who stick to a specific genre of boring and non...cant find the word.

So anyways being on an all round African trip through and with different experiences I've come to see home In and on a new light. Noah made a joke about how the Whites used Reverse psychology in getting Africans to work for themselves. They made an Advert and stated in verbatim, "Only Africans should apply." Noah goes on to joke that the blacks were happy, "Now you know how we feel! Go and be a manager."

That's racist, huh?

There's different times I've been approached by Non Africans black and/or white or brown. I've also heard them talk about Africa. And just like Black people, non Africans, agree, melanated people everywhere do not grow because Of The effects of colonialism and/or Racism.

Take the "Walk to Independence" for example. Why is it that African states are still struggling to get back in their feet? We go to Mozambique where the Portuguese left with everything. With everything. Burnt down the Industries they built and shoved independence down our(African) throats.

South Africa? Last country to gain independence. Which means they are to be the most developed country...no State, in Africa. But are still struggling with the Jaws and Claws of Apartheid. Heck we even laugh About it.

How about my country. Can compare it to our "ogas". Hosts among the Richest people in the continent amongst the poorest in the continent. We borrow loans that we don't need, steal money and lie to the people's faces. Creating a wide rift between Two sets if people. Making sure they stay on top. Jobs are theirs and the country is run by them.

Sounds Familiar?

We complain that the Chinese are taking over, the whites are taking over and that everything goes to them. You want Independence.

Do you know what "Independence" is?

You work for these people for 20years and the moment they leave, your company falls. What have you been doing for 20 years? What knowledge have you garnered? You just sat there, like an African, got comfortable and weren't taking notes.

Yes I said that.

Okay. The Chinese leave. Which African state/person will you give that tender to build a good road. Roadworthy. The Russians leave. Which African will manage the Telecommunications industry well. The Cubans leave. What honest doctors will you have. Heck you don't even pay them well. Do you trust police officers? Okay. You want an honest and fair elections. But with all your PhDs, Masters and what not, you still vote on Tribalistic lines.

You are given 1dollar to sell your vote and complain tomorrow that the government does not take care of you. During the campaign period the leader you like does not address issues but just jabs his way through it, you vote them in and complain they don't do their job.

You complain the non African/black companies are taking over but brag when you purchase items from their companies and complain when Your Own people give you items worth their time, quality and money. You are more respected when you work for them, Marry one Of them etc and look down upon that Guy-Girl because he's as Dark as a South Sudanese.

Smh coz your mama white huh

You wear weaves, marry a woman who wears "human hair" and lace front weaves, because her natural hair is too nappy. You're more beautiful in a short black dress than a great sculptured African Attire.

This is why South African Music will break barriers. Why Authors from West Africa will have theirs stories told for years. Proud of their accents, proud of their local dialect. Proud of their hard to pronounce local names.

Or like my Law former classmates, want a light skin girl with an African Body, because all other dark girls are ugly.

So that makes you, and your dark mum ugly right?

In your resume, when your doing your life history and all, you confidently say, "We slept hungry, we were mugged, slept in the ghetto etc just so that you get the job or that record deal. Or like again my law classmates, Rich boy by the way, would dedicate a day Of The month when his "mentor" would come, to dress up as a "street boy" who's trying his hardest to look like he's trying to "better his life". All In an effort to get a few bundles of cash.

No offence to those who've actually lived the hard life.

Your people are proud of your son amd daughter because she studied in Australia, Im Russia, in the UK and like every other African, In America.

I can hear you say "here's another 'woke' African Rant"

You'd rather not fight for your rights and bring change. You'd rather marry that old man And suffer to make money, instead of starting from the bottom with your fellow melanated kind.

You'd rather sit put and not annoy them. Be in suits and insult your kind who wear Kentes and Vitenges, than annoy "Massa". You'd Rather be a cook, maid and Driver than invest on/in Your Own. You'd rather steal from yoir kind and impress "Massa" than build Your Own.

You'd rather walk with them who wear the white hat than laugh next to the earth.

Your too busy asking for Independence while proving to them, exactly what they think of us.

Still want independence?

Well you won't get it. You're too busy being physically African. Than mentally.

You're currently, not worth the independence your looking for

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irregulardiaryposts · 3 years

Text

00:53 21/06/2021

Hello again <3

so i think im gonna write about my mental health today because i dont feel like i have anyone who understands fully apart from myself maybe so i need to Organise my Thoughts. as a kid i had a pretty normal childhood, a mum a dad and a brother - pretty nuclear right. but as a child i felt like my family maybe wasnt quite right, that this wasnt supposed to be what family is? perhaps. - i was scared of my mum a lot because she wasnt very understanding of me - and i was a great kid, never getting into trouble, very good at school, no issues whatsover. the thing that really shows how i thought of my relationship with my mum was when i was like maybe 8 or so having a parents night and at it my teacher had nothing bad to say apart from i was kinda bossy in group settings (im sure i dont need to explain how misogynistic that actually is- i was not bossy i was a natural leader) and when i got home my mum told me off for that and i felt like she was kinda cold to me and not taking all the good things about me into consideration when telling me off for that.

i feel like thats a really defining moment in my life when i realised i cant expect adults to Understand me, realised how people treat young girls, also started my defiant behaviour maybe or was kinda one of the key moments that made me dislike certain authorities in my life, that if people wont understand me regardless of how i explain myself then i wont bother trying to be understood by people who wont matter to me. anyway yes i was scared of my mum-like petrified sometimes- but my dad wasnt great either, he also had his shortcomings. i feel like he never really cared about me like he was kinda apathetic towards raising me like a parent - i feel he would be better suited as an uncle to someone rather than a dad - the funny childish guy that makes kids laugh -not the uncaring dad that cant be bothered to really learn about his kids. and i feel im sitting here complaining about my parents when the fact is that a lot of adults should never be parents, society has conditioned people into thinking the only way to be fulfilled in life is to live vicariously through your kids when life gets to such a boring and monotonous place where you feel the need to create a new life to spice things up lmao. i feel a lot of parents regret having kids but they cannot express that regret because it was their choice and they should deal with that, also saying you regret it would be pretty horrible to the kid.

so while yes i am complaing about my parents i dont think they were Bad in any way just not that great yaknow. also i just notice all these things growing up and i feel its been pretty impactful to understanding myself and my parents. also just some anecdotes from my childhood - i used to watch my dad play video games like the uncharted games i think theyre called, and whenever i got scared i used to hide behind the couch until the scary part was over (usually a lot of guns and high energy fight scenes thats too much adrenaline for a 7 yo) and sometimes when i would take out my dad/brothers game i would get them to fo the hard parts and do other stuff myself - i dont remember many games i played apart from one of the spidermen games where u could just web around the city and not progress apart from sometimes you would come across some strippers and i accidently got into a fight with them (also hot women with umbrellas they use to fight- maybe i went near them on purpose) i would yell to my dad and get him to do it for me. also on new years eve whenever my mum was working and we werent going to any family parties we would make a bunch of food and put it out in the kitchen - wed make like homemade onion rings, chips, have crisps and dips, and a bunch of junk basically and watch like austin powers or some shit and genuinely miss those times they were so simple. but a lot of thats tainted now from what happened. also my brothers always been annoying as shit but when we were kids we couldnt be in the same room without arguing which like whatever thats how kids are esp brothers and sisters for some reason.

i think thats majority of the background needed for the rest. wait this is a little addition but i meant to mention this here so ill put it in- basically sometimes on holidays i would geniunely think my parents hate each other/ were getting a divorce like once when we were in florida in 2012 my dad convinced my mum (as well as me and my brother convinced her since we liked them) we convinced her to go on a water slide thing that u had to walk up the stairs for, it was outdoors, and it was kinda tall and then we got in one of the big donut things and it swooshed from side to side a lot and was generally pretty scary i suppose for someone who doesnt like rides esp since you had to hold on to the handles there were no buckles or anything, and so when we got off the ride my mum was big mad at my dad and like wouldnt talk to him and stuff like that which was pretty uncomfortable to have to be the 8 year old mediator of that but there was also another occasion i think (maybe also at florida) where they were made at each other and i asked my mum if they were getting divorced and all she said was 'ask ur dad' like???? no sort of consolation to this child who thinks their parents hate each other nooo just petty 'ask him' and theres also been other times when they fight/ are mad and they dont feel the need to hide it from us so i felt quite anxious around my parents sometimes.

so ahnyway . yes. when i had just turned 13 my parents split up and it fucked me up in a multitude of ways. also i cant beleive i stopped being a proper kid at 13, like as soon as i turned a teenager life hit me like a fucking truck. so the context as to why they split is still kinda lost to me ngl but they didnt tell me much anyway since i was young but my mum basically said my dad didnt love her anymore and he wanted to separate. its kinda funny because leading up to this my dad had been sleeping in the living room for like a few weeks and there was on and off fighting i could hear and i basically thought they were fighting over me and that i was in trouble and it kinda used to keep me up coz i could hear loud voices when they thought i was asleep- which is probably the cause of why i get veryyyy mad and angry when i hear my mum at like 1 am downstairs when shes drinking and im trying to sleep, probably something ive internalised (is that the word?) and made me respond so strongly to those type of noises.

anywayyyyy yes i thought i was in trouble when they were actually just getting a divorce so ... yeah you can really tell i was young and didnt understand adult issues or really couldnt figure this out myself from all the arguing and him sleeping downstairs lmao. anyway my dad moved out and it was just me my mum and my brother now and at this point my brother wouldve been about to turn 18, so although still kinda shit, not really as affected my it as a 13 yo, just to keep in mind. so i was devastated obviously and my whole world was kinda shattered but i had to hold it together a bit, also i was sometimes my mothers own therapist having to say things like 'everything happens for a reason' 'itll get better' in response to her deteriorating mental health and her questions that would be really hard for me to answer like 'why did he leave' etc (bish im a child be there for me not wallow in ur own pity, u have ur whole life to sort this out youre an adult, im a 13 you and only months away from wanting to kms hun think of ur CHILD please) anyway this left me feeling like a burden if i were to share my mental state because when my mum shared her stuff she was burdening me (AGAIN i was 13 she is an adult) so that made me bottle a lot of things up also the fact that i had no one to share it with because she works as a nurse and now shes a single mother and so she works almost all hours of most days and i dont see her much, my brother was either working at this time or just didnt give enough of a shit about me to make sure i ate.

i went from being catered to for every meal because i didnt know how to cook to suddenly no one being there for me so i had to learn how to do it myself. needless to say that lead to a bunch of unhealthy eating habbits like eating the same things every day - frozen pizza, cheese toasties, i cant think of anything else probs because i didnt make anything else just ate chocolates or didnt eat breakfast coz i woke up at 2pm. just general unhealthyness both in substance and like how healthy that was for my head yk. also this is during the summer btw so it gave me the option to be incredibly depressed - im not saying that as an edgy teen thing to say im being 100% genuine i was very depressed like textbook style - not eating or overeating, not showering/ taking care of myself, extreme lack of energy and hated doing social things coz i had to put on a farce that i was okay meanwhile i couldnt wait to get into my bed and sleep the next day and a half away.

i very vividly remember at the start of the summer holiday my friend asked me if i wanted to go out and do something and i rememeber just crying at that because i had no reason to say no but i just didnt want to and felt like i couldnt do anything and so i lied and said i wasnt feeling well and then put my phone down and curled up in my bed and cried coz i was frustrated and upset and i couldnt really understand what was wrong with me and why i was Like This.

god i didnt take into account how tired i was and how late it is when i started this huh, this isnt even half of it, but i have obligations in the mornign, the last until uni or whatever so ill put this in my drafts and finsih it somethime. alrigtht it is 02:08 btw z_z. also ive just now decided im gonna re organise my tumblr so if this ends up being an actual blog thing i can navigate it easier by adding tags and such. anywau goodnight.

20:21 30/06/2021

MOTHERFOIUHIFIUDVMKCVKM V

MY LAPTOP SHUT DOWE IN THE MIDDLE OF THSAT SO ITS ALL GONE BASICALLY I WAS DEPRESSED BURTNOUT GIFTERD KID AND IT SUCKED YADDa YADDSZ ANYTWAY

23:01- well. yes earlier i wrote a little about the ages 13-16 and how they sucked but whatever it got deleted the more pertinent stuff happened in the last year or so anyway.

um yeah so i started the last year of highschool as a 16 year old with a fucked up brain and never having learned any study techniques or work ethic in the slightest. i took 3 uni-level courses only one i actually wanted to do, most people take 2 at most or even 1/0 but do other classes. honestly it fucking sucked this year for school but i scraped all passes so thank god for that. so i started the year quite optimistic, or as much as i could be and in all fairness the content of this year wasnt actually that bad considering i was doing 3 hard classes but corona really truly fucked everything up and by November i had mentally dropped out of my classes but of course i still had to go to them. i feel like im an oddly independent teen because ive never had a solid parental presence in a while, like i had to do a lot for myself and maybe i should thank myself for getting me through it all because i really did pull through.

my thoughts keep drifting from what im writing coz i wanna talk about different things and im just thinking maybe i shouldve just posted the last one then added a reblog when i could be bothered to write and not force myself because if theres ever a reoccurring theme in my life is that if i force myself to do anything i will hate it with my entire being, so maybe i should just do a short synopsis and write about something else afterwards.

so i took 3 hard classes, slowly lost all motivation because in jan it switches to online classes and i could Not deal with those it was horrible, and i became more of a "troublesome student" in one of my classes *cough* maths *cough* and almost got "kicked out" of taking the class just because the teacher was a control freak but like wanted to control all of our actions and behaviour, also i think i may have adhd and another kid in my class i think he does too and surprise surprise the teacher "dislikes" him too but its only a farce because he doesnt actually dislike him its only so that i cant call him out for singling me out when other students behave "badly" too. but anyways maybe ill come back to this in a while when i can be arsed explaining my complicated relationship with my parents.

the only reason i wanted to write this today was so that i could tag the post with like june 2021 or something and not june/july, but i might make another post later, Anyway happy end of pride month i supose, hope u figure it out me!

#why does tumblr break up the paragraphs like this #there isnt supposed to be paragraphs #maybe i should change that #anyway off to fix all my post so far and tag the all like ->#june 2021 entry #2021 the year of fun

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pappycat89 · 3 years

Text

and the saga of semi-weird dreams continues!

So i feel i should preface this with the fact that i rarely remember my dreams for more then a few hours after waking up, but the last week or so ive been remembering them for like a day and a half so thats weird

anyways, this one started with me, my family and a bunch of my friends heading for a party. It was Pink themed, so we all had to wear something that was hot pink, and i had found this really nice top while op-shopping that fit and was the right colour. It was a weird cut top, like a very feminine neckline but also like jacket tails and these weird sleeves. anyway, i decided to wear a skirt with it because even though i knew my family would be weird about it i had my friends so fuck it.

Anyway, we get to the party, which was being held in the student accommodation from an old university i went to, but the buildings had been re-arranged. Anyway, there were a bunch of tables with food and cake and games to play, and people had split into their own smaller groups. I wandered away to get some air (cos i sometimes get overwhelmed at parties and need some alone time) and was walking through some trees behind one of the buildings when someone yelled out to me, and started pointing a flashlight at me. I instantly knew they were hunting me and i had to run, but i was a lot further into the trees then i thought and they were gaining on me.

Just before they managed to catch up i burst out of the trees and back into the party. My mum started to yell at me about where i had run off to, and my 3 year old niece came running up and demanded to be picked up, so i did. She was then suddenly a baby born doll that needed its diaper changed, so i told my sister and my niece (who was still a doll) started yelling "poo bum poo bum" over and over. My sister started getting angry at me for not changing her diaper, and i started getting annoyed at her because i had no idea where the diapers were, and she ended up snatching my niece away and huffing off to do it herself.

Then, as dreams are want to do sometimes, the scene changed. It was after the party now, and my friends and i decided to go out. We were talking like we were gonna go party at a club, but the plan was to find a nice coffee shop/karaoke bar and just chill out for a bit. While walking along, we got stopped by this huge brick wall of a man. He grabbed my wrist and squeezed, saying some very rude things to all of us but in like this weirdly sweet customer service voice. Anyways, we tried to get him to let go, but none of us could, until one of my friends grabbed this guy just above his collar bone and squeezed so had we could hear the bone snap. The big guy ran off, and we were in shock, until my friend grabbed a nearby handrailing and squeezed, crushing it in his hand and we all started nodding like "oh yeah, we forgot you had super strength lol"

Another scene change, and we're now in a department store. Theres hordes of people running around and the whole place is getting really hectic. Our group got split up, and i was left with the same friend who had super strength. We were wandering and chatting, looking for the others, when a large group of people came running down the aisle ahead of us. I grabbed my friend and we dodged out of the way but kinda got knocked over. I sat up, and he was sideways in my lap. We laughed about the hordes, and checked to make sure we weren't hurt. He made a joke (i honestly dont remember what it was) but i laughed and did like that cat headbutt thing into his chest. I looked up at him, still giggling, and he looked down at me and said something along the lines of "if you're thinking what im thinking then do it" (he didnt actually say anything, it was like a bunch of thoughts and feelings all at once but the basic message of it was undeniably "yes, i would like this to happen") anywhos, we kissed, and it was really nice, and then an alarm started playing over the speakers to evacuate the store but it turned out to be my actual alarm and i woke up

So yeah, i have some weird dreams. well, not all weird. like i get what some of it meant. you know, like kissing people im interested in, and my family getting annoyed at minor things and then not listening to me. but the rest is weird Not sure why im sharing them here, but i figure i might as well if they're gonna be stuck in my head all day. besides, maybe if i keep this up my brain will write my D&D campaign for my while i sleep

(also im not naming people in the dream because i dont want to embarass anyone should they see this)

#personal #more dream stuff #i dunno why i keep posting about them but yeah #bens dream tag

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ackleholics · 7 years

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bitch i demand you answer all 60.

u r a MENACE

1. selfie

alrdy done

2. what would you name your future kids?

lmao im never gonna have kids rip. but i do have two smol sons and they are magnus and alec

3. do you miss anyone?

yep :/

4. what are you looking forward to?

alrdy done

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

def. harry, matt, isaiah. Hamish and andy. my friends sometimes (not u nat ur a butthead)

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?

definitely. if i miss them i pretty much never get over it. if it’s someone im mad at that i normally forget em p quickly so LOL

7. what was your life like last year?

the same cept i was Less Woke™

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?

no? that’s a thing?

9. who did you last see in person?

mum

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

yep i sure damn hope so

11. are you listening to music right now?

nope. only rlly listen to it when im writing. otherwise it distracts me

12. what is something you want right now?

my pACKAGE TO QARRIVE ALREADY JFC

13. how do you feel right now?

Tired, Depressed™, chill, the usual

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?

probs my cousin at my bday or smth i dunno

15. personality description

Depressed™

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?

im p blunt most of the time. things i keep secret r secrets ppl tell me to keep or if im crushing.

17. opinion on insecurities.

depends. im insecure about like, a few things, but a lot of things i’m just liek eh whatever about. like if ppl judge u for who u r then that’s they’re business and u can’t do anything about it so

18. do you miss how thing were a year ago?

nah

19. have you ever been to New York?

nope. would totes go to meet matt tho :P

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?

errrrrr. pink’s song maybe?

21. age and birthday?

19 and if u kno my bday u kno it good for u

22. description of crush.

don’t currently have one. my last one was… well, it didn’t work out ill just say that XD

23. fear(s)

im p scared of ppl u look up to turning out to be homophobes/assholes ngl

24. height

5″10′ish

25. role model

hmm. i don’t rlly think i have one specifically. for themes, Slut Jensen. for writing…. there are a lot of fanfic writers i adore. for graphics, @galaxystiel @stardustsam @hallowedbecastiel etc etc.

26. idol(s)

is there a difference between this and role models? is it more like celebrities? i guess Tahmoh Penikett, Andy samberg, Misha Collins, Tyler Hoechlin, Dylan O'Brien, Lee Majdoub, Josh Hutcherson, Colin O'donoghue…. idk there’s a lot

27. things i hate

homophobes, acephobes, ppl who think asexuals shouldn’t be a part of the LGBTQIA+ community, general shitty ppl.

28. i’ll love you if…

u like shows i like. u have similar opinions or have ones that enhance/better my own.

29. favourite film(s)

spirited away. eagle eye. thor ragnarok

30. favourite tv show(s)

supernatural shadowhunters b99 lucifer designated survivor DGHDA idk there’s a lot

31. 3 random facts

alrdy done

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?

both. depends. on tumblr mainly girls cause i like, don’t know any guys. wait no i have 1 guy friend on tumblr. for gaming it’s guys and girls

33. something you want to learn

ASL or AUSLAN. Jscript/other codes.

34. most embarrassing moment

GOD SO MANY.

35. favourite subject

does sleeping count?

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

become a successful author, find someone that makes me happy and will be my life partner, meet matt/harry/isiah/jensen/jared/misha/TAHMOH etc etc

37. favourite actor/actress

tAHMOH FRIGGIN PENIKETT

38. favourite comedian(s)

hamish and andy. bo burnham. Conan obrien.

39. favourite sport(s)

NONE LMAO. video gaming there

40. favourite memory

oooo this is a lot of pressure. um idk there’s a few. i can’t think of any super recent. i got to stare at tahmoh once from a distance and that was p awesome

41. relationship status

sadly, single

42. favourite book(s)

books? pfft. i only know fanfiction

43. favourite song ever

EVER? holy shit um. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJfFZqTlWrQ

44. age you get mistaken for

i normally get mistaken for younger than older.

45. how you found out about your idol

tahmoh penikett, through supernatural, tho i saw him first on castle i think? or around the same time. and then i watched doll house for him

46. what my last text message says

im gonna make pozza first

47. turn ons

none lmfao????? i don’t like..... 0.o how does an ace answer this

but er if i had to give an answer i like ppls eyes. i appreciate honesty and genuity. i like when ppl are themselves.

48. turn offs

lying, cheating, homophobia, casual racism etc etc

49. where i want to be right now

a billionaire in some quiet suburb in a cozy apartment with ridiculously fast unlimited wifi.

50. favourite picture of your idol

51. starsign

aries yeh?

52. something i’m talented at

pfft im an untalented dirt bag. im moderately good at coding i guess

53. 5 things that make me happy

sleeping. writing. reading. TV (most of the time) and my friends (on occasion :P)

54. something thats worrying me at the moment

that im gonna be mailed anthrax

55. tumblr friends

The BatSquad ofc (also check my updates tab)

56. favourite food(s)

cHICKEN!!!!! PIZZA!!!! NACHOS!!!!! NANDOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

57. favourite animal(s)

owls, foxes, cats, dogs, tigers, lions, snakes, literally all of them p much

58. description of my best friend

i can’t pick just one fuck off.

59. why i joined tumblr

for tyler hoechlin and teen wolf and sterek

60. ask me anything you want

Galaxystiel: hey im an asshole right? for making u do all of these questions in one go.

Me: Yep

*totally a conversation that happened*

these are actually nice you fucking nerd- ASK GAME

#galaxystiel #ask game

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nymphisl · 7 years

Text

Im Youngmin as your boyfriend

- so turns out he actually takes the same bus as you, and for a while he’s been admiring you - making sure you have somewhere to sit, even if it means he has to stand for the whole journey - however, your always too tired to even realise what’s going on - but its the day of ur job interview and lmao you woke up late! - and so guess who forgot their bag which contains all their belongings, including ur phone and wallet? - hahAHAHAHa you… - ur at the entrance of the bus and of course everyone’s looking at the strange girl who doesn’t have a bus pass but is still trying to get in… - and all of a sudden someone from behind pays for your bus fare - your too embarrassed to even look them in the eyes but you still thank them - what makes it worse is the fact that the bus is extra crowded and you hate standing because you can hardly even reach the handles that dangle down for you to hold on - “just hold onto me” - you see an arm held tightly onto the handle and you can feel the other arm wrapped loosely on your waist - lmao by loosely I mean awkwardly propped on your waist unsure how tight or loose to hold you, as well as unsure where exactly to prop their arm… - nevertheless you’d rather not embarrass yourself even more by falling over so you start to hold tightly onto him - can I just say, a wHOLE LOADA STARING - DIS BOI HAS NO CHILL - when you finally have enough courage to look them in their eyes you realise they’ve been looking at you this whole time - BLUSHING!!!!!! - warning- youngmin likes to smirk… a lot - you can feel the laughter coming from his chest - he follows you out the bus and claims he’s going wherever you are - ‘I’m youngmin by the way, what’s your name?“ - “why do you keep following me?…” - your so embarrassed and you really don’t want him to see how red you are because of him - “fine. You caught me, by now I should probably be in my lecture… But before I go, at least let me get your number.” - how could you say no??? - and before you both know it your pretty much texting non stop and he asks you out on a date - your first official date is at a PC bang, and yes he was planning to be romantic and teach you to play one of the games called over watch - but sIKE, you were a frequent PC bang user back in the day of high school and let’s just say, your way better than him - “but I just wanted this to be romantic and I wanted to teach you, I was planning so much and now you’ve just completely beat me…” - youngmin whining, with his lips pouted and hair in a hot mess - before you knew it, you had your lips on his - fIRST KISS!!!!! - you could just about reach his lips but after a few seconds youngmin already had his hands wrapped around your waist - “youngmin… I’m sorry that you sUCK AT OVERWATCH!” - you try your best to run away but he catches up to you instantly - and yay, second kiss - this time he’s confident and in charge, hands placed lightly on your cheeks and yours were tightly around his body - “wow, you’re an absolute beast on overwatch- it makes me like you even more…” - confESSION!!! - its official y'all are bf and gf!!!!! - changing his relationship status on all social media - as well as bragging about you a lot - “yah, woojin! My girlfriend can actually play overwatch aND SHE’S REALLY GOOD, what can your girlfriend do? SiKE I LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND SHE’S REALLY NICE please stop hitting me…” - smiling youngmin means your most likely smiling as well - you can’t help but get lost in his eyes when they crinkle as he smiles - normally silences with youngmin are the kind which are enjoyable, no awkwardness just a sense of understanding - he walks you home when its dark and at times like this he’s quite protective, youngmin more or less always has his hand around your waist when your walking home - which your fine with tbh - but in general you guys trust each other but sometimes you feel that youngmin is way too chill when your around guys, and you’ve realised he doesn’t really care or get jealous - “do you even like me? It just seems that sometimes you don’t even care when I’m around these strange men!“ - “are you being serious right now? You don’t even understand how crazy I feel when I see you around these guys but I trust you and I don’t want to be that annoying over protective boyfriend… I trust you, y/n and you should know that i only have room in my heart for you.” - you both apologize to each other and make up - but what’s a make up witHOUT any make up sex… - lemme just say, youngmin likes to take charge… - and by now your neighbours clearly know his name .-. - but just in case you haven’t realised what I’m hinting at; a whole loada love bites and delicate kisses on your body as well as hardcore exercise - “yOUNGMIN, look at all the red marks I have on my neck from last night. Do you realise how hard it is for me to cover it up with makeup?!” - “well you weren’t complaining last night” - and there it is again, his smirk is now even more prominent and mixed with his perfect bed hair and morning voice… - well one thing leads to another and your late for work, again… - cute café dates and surprise the cafés you normally go to are cat cafés! - rather than being focused on what your talking about he seems busy with stroking a nearby cat but now this gives you a chance to admire him - “admit it, I look really cool right now” - hE was right, with his satoori and his jawline and the cat… - “you’re the lamest person I know” - “y/n you make my heart flutter whenever you act like this, so cold and cool… Wow- 100% tsundere style, I’m in love” - youngmin teasing you was something common but he really did mean the last part… - you rolled your eyes before a laugh finally erupted out - journeys on the bus together consists of sharing earphones and normally fighting over who gets to pick the music - “but youngminnnnn, you love me right? And so you’ll love anything I love, and I love jiyoung oppa so let’s listen to some of his music!!!” - youngmin doesn’t respond and you notice him flinch at mentioning love but try your best to ignore it so you just change the music to your gdragon playlist - your walking home together and he’s still not responding - “youngmin, what’s wrong? Why aren’t you talking… Are you just going to continue like this? Really?” - you try your best aegyo to persuade him to open up but unlike usual, it has failed - “yah do you know how you make me feel? Whenever I’m with you its like I can’t even feel my heart anymore, what do you want to hear? That you’re right? Because you are, I’m probably talking absolute bullshit right now but I just really like you- no, I love you.” - you pull his face close to yours - “me too, I love you” - there’s a smile on his lips whilst you kiss - “but seriously, y/n why do you call gdragon ‘oppa’ but not me?” - “because your lame” - youngmin also likes to play with your hair - whilst your waiting in line his hand is around your shoulder and reaching to fiddle with your hair - one night you’ve decided to try and get him to braid your hair - at least he tried… - he also likes whispering in your ear, knowing especially how ticklish you are - passerby’s would think he’s saying something dirty but in reality its just dumb jokes - “y/n you no longer have to watch asmr videos, I will be your asmr and im available 24/7” - “hahaha very funny.” - sharing clothes! He lowkey leaves his jumpers at your house so you can wear them… But he gets highkey turned on whenever he sees you in his clothes - youngmin also endulges in couple items, making sure to drag you to buy matching t-shirts as well as matching phone cases - “look, I sent this picture to my mum and she says we look cute… I would’ve expected her to cringe” - “y/n! How could you do this to me?! Sending her a photo which I probably look weird in- I’m her future son in law and…” - he stops at ‘son in law’ - “oppa, what are you even- psh, son in law?…” - awkward silence - “you finally called me oppa, that’s all that matter right now and we can discuss the future… In the future…” - his smile reaches his eyes and your heart instantly melts - “well, youngmin- son in law doesn’t sound that bad, right?” - all of a sudden youngmin is on one knee and his hand reaches his chest pocket - “Y/n, will you… ACCEPT MY HEART?!” - Instead of pulling out a ring box like you were assuming he would, he pulls out nothing but his fingers in the shape of a heart - “wow, I’m in love with such a loser” - aNd you both spend the night in each others arms with an empty pizza box and mulan playing on the TV - your both in love with each other and thats all that matters right now but as to what the future may hold… Well, who knows

#im youngmin as your husband next???#hehehhehehhe #im youngmin #produce 101 #produce 101 imagine #im youngmin as your boyfriend #hella long #produce 101 scenario #ma baby

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