#also the fact that i wasn't reading the instructions to begin with and only started when i got to a part i couldn't intuit own my own so i | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

brick-a-doodle-do · 2 years

Note

#2 for notes & #62 for docs. :)

#2 for docs is LONG......so i'm making this a lil' fic :DD

(edit) okay i just read this and genuinely it's a pretty okay oneshot?? wtf??? here you go!! that moment where you read super old writing and realize it's pretty much completely similar to your writing now </3

(also scroll down for #62, it’s there i promise)

meeting boo

wc: 1889

tw: injury (non-fatal), swearing, mention of fatal vore (doesn't happen), aaand i think that's it

────────────────────────────────────────────

Tubbo yelped, narrowly missing the edge of the cabinet and falling, his arms instinctively moving to grab something, but they never did. The rope his leg was secured to went taut with a harsh snap, a spasm of pain shooting through his leg while he hung there, his cloak beginning to block his sight. The lightheadedness of being upside down kick in, along with the half-lidded eyes and numbness of his leg. He could feel conscious slipping from him inch by inch, and before he knew it he was just a beat away from passing out.

Until he wasn't.

He hadn’t properly registered what was happening, except for when something warm enveloping him from under. Shit. Tubbo tried to scramble back, only to be stopped by the rope. “Stop, stop, stop!” Tubbo yelped, pushing the fingers away from him. “I’m not going to hurt you, just stay still,” Ranboo instructed, his words soft. “Ranboo, please, stop,” Tears pricked at his eyes while he helplessly laid within the human’s grip, squirming occasionally against the fresh wave of pain moving throughout his numb leg.

His vision was cloudy, his throat hurt, and his eyes were threatening to close. He couldn’t, though. Not when he’s vulnerable in a human’s grip. “Please, calm down.”

“Stop..” Tubbo whined, nearly yelling again as his leg was free, pins and needles moving throughout his leg while it returned to its normal- no, abnormal position. It was broken. “Fuck…” Tubbo whined, placing a hand on his broken leg. “Put- put me down.” Tubbo tried, and surprisingly, the cold counter was soon his holder.

Ranboo crouched down, his hands curled against of the counter while his covered face stared at him blankly. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Tubbo whined again. “I- I could help you?” Ranboo offered. Tubbo rapidly shook his head. “I can do it fine, just leave.” Tubbo choked on his words, tears now streaming down his partly-scarred cheeks. “Sure, right, okay.” Ranboo stood and backed away slowly before fully leaving the room with a click of the door.

Tubbo sat on the counter quietly, a hand clamped over his mouth to stifle his hiccuping sobs. He pressed his lips in to a thin line then placed his hands behind him. It was slow, but he could manage pushing himself backward towards his makeshift medical supplies in the wall.

–

It was a lousy cast, and was really just medical tape wrapped tightly around his leg, but it would be fine. Right? He’d just stay here for a while. Maybe he should go stay with Tommy? No. He should treat this on his own, he doesn’t need someone to help him. He’s been solo for a year now, he doesn’t need to break that.

—

It wasn’t helping. It was a bit, but not much. He couldn’t walk, and more importantly, he couldn’t get food, which was taking its affect on him now.

“Hey, um, this is really stupid, I- I don’t even know where you’re at, or if you’re still here… but, I just wanted to ask how your… leg is doing, is it- you know, healing?” Ranboo’s voice beamed from outside the wall suddenly. . . he was showing genuine concern for the borrower.

“I’m fine.” Tubbo announced.

“Can- can you walk yet?”

“No.”

Ranboo didn’t respond for a bit. Tubbo sat in anticipation for the next words, but they were late to come. He started to believe the human had left after disappointment washed over him over the fact his little snack couldn’t walk yet.

“There’s medicine out here if you want it.” Was all he said.

Tubbo had never had human medicine before. A lot of borrowers will mix random herbs and call it medicine. But they weren’t pills like humans have, they had a lousy soup-like thing. He didn’t even know if he could eat a human-sized pill. He could try, but what if it was a trap? He couldn’t escape from it due to his leg.. gods he’s overthinking. “It’s not a trap if you’re thinking that.”

“To be fair, you saying that makes it more suspicious, bossman.”

Tubbo heard Ranboo sigh in amusement. “It’s here if you’d like it.” He said again. Tubbo made a small noise in acknowledgement. He doubted the human heard it but he really didn’t care right now. Sleep was pulling at his eyes and before he knew his heart beat had dropped and conscious slipped out of him.

–

Leg pain had woken him up. Tubbo groggily propped himself up against the dusty wall and rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hand. Ranboo’s past words repeated in his head. There was medicine set out for him, right. No. It was a trap. . . or poison. Not medicine. A human would never do that for his kind.

He knew this, and still, in the back of his mind, he pondered on what was actually out there. Maybe there was nothing and Ranboo was just toying with him, trying to get him out onto the counter and vulnerable so he could overpower him. Would he be eaten? Kept as a pet in a jar or a cage? Flattened? Cooked? Endless endings.

And that was why he continued to lay in bed. And lay, and lay, and lay for weeks. He slept through most of it, and if he hadn’t been sleeping he was either having a short conversation with Ranboo or salvaging the last of his food. He’d run out three days ago and it was starting to affect him badly.

Nearly six weeks had passed, Tubbo had been without food for almost a week now. He hadn’t gotten up in a bit, the last time he did he could manage a short walk with a bad limp. Perhaps he should try it again.

He could move his leg better than he could a week ago, and it definitely felt better to walk on now. He had a limp, but he could manage with going out to get food.

He limped through the room to the rope he’d set in the back of the cabinet. Shit. He couldn’t climb this, it'd fuck his leg up again, right? He supposed he could go on the counter… but he’d need a rope for that as well. He could go a bit longer without food, maybe.. or maybe Ranboo could help? No. Just climb the rope and get food.

It wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be, truth be told. His pace was a bit slow while he tried to keep his leg steady and not move it quickly or drastically, but within moments he’d found himself in the dark cabinet. He felt around for any type of box or bag, a wave of relief washing over him as he brushed over a familiar box. Hopefully.

He maneuvered though it, breaking the cracker into four to store easier. He stuffed the last quarter into the now-full bag. The cabinet door opened, catching Tubbo off guard. “Fuck,” Tubbo frowned, gazing at the masked human ahead of him. He looked relieved.

“Sorry,” The two muttered in unison.

Tubbo looked down in embarrassment, then back up with a genuine, small smile, while Ranboo huffed in amusement again. He did that a lot. "It’s good to see you’re… doing better,” Tubbo nodded, the grin gone. “Right, well, I’m doing a stream in the kitchen, you may want to… lay low?” Ranboo suggested.

“Okay,” Tubbo nodded again, taking a hesitant step back.

Ranboo closed the cabinet door after their encounter to allow the tiny his privacy. He hadn’t completely grasped the whole borrower concept yet, probably from Tubbo’s neglect for telling him information and Google’s unhelpful results.

Not that he could blame the borrower; someone as small on him clearly wouldn’t feel safe sharing information on his species. If he was really that desperate for information, he could ask Wilbur, given that he had a much closer bond with Tommy than Ranboo had with Tubbo.

He had time before his stream, he could probably squeeze in a visit to Wilbur’s? No, that would be stupid to go there just to get advice on how to win Tubbo over. They’re making progress; it won’t take too long. Hopefully.

—

The stream went fine, Tubbo assumingely stayed.. wherever he was. The walls, maybe? That seemed like the most logical option. He remembered Wilbur briefly muttering about it to Tommy on a call. Whatever.

He idly typed ‘good stream’ in Ranmail then began cleaning his… terribly messed up kitchen. He frowned at the sight of raw egg from the subgoal, and countless wrappers and unclosed bags. Flour was everywhere, and a partially eaten cake was in the middle of it.

“Hey, bossman,” Tubbo’s voice was quiet, but he managed to hear it. Ranboo turned, his eyes landing on the small form on the counter. He crouched, curling his hands around the counter. “Hey, what’s up?”

“I- I um… gods this is stupid, but I- I just wanted to.. thank you for talking with me for- for the past few weeks and- um- untying me.”

Ranboo smiled even though it wasn’t visible. “Did Tommy put you up to this?”

“What? How do you even- no, he didn’t…”

“Alright, well, you’re welcome. You seemed like you could use the company.”

Tubbo fiddled with his thumbs while thinking of a response. “Yeah, Tommy’s been so worked up with his human lately. A- And I’m also sorry that I was so… quippy? with you. My- my kind really aren’t supposed to talk, or even be spotted by a human, so-“ Ranboo shook his head. “I get it.” He said softly. “So- uh.. yeah, thank you.” Tubbo smiled genuinely. Tubbo took a step back, and Ranboo nodded shortly. A beat of silence passed before the borrower spoke up again. “So…uh, what’d you do to your kitchen?”

Ranboo looked back at the kitchen island then back at the tiny. “I don’t even know.” Tubbo huffed in subtle amusement, but it was there. The borrower opened his mouth to speak again, but was cut off.

“Tubbo!” Tommy’s muffled voice called from (assumingely) the walls, catching both Tubbo and Ranboo’s attention. “Now he comes. Hold on,” Tubbo muttered, holding a finger up as a sign to wait, then disappearing beyond the walls. The two’s probably quieted conversation couldn’t be heard from out here, so Ranboo returned to cleaning while he waited.

“Tommy?” Tubbo called out as he maneuvered though the dark hallway until he spotted Tommy “Hey, big man!” Tommy grinned, but it fell a moment later. “Why’re you limping?”

“Oh, I- I uh… broke my leg,”

Tommy gaped at that. “You fucking what? Shit, Tubbo I’m sorry I didn’t visit you- I, uh, was giving you space because of what happened the last time I came,” Tommy fretted. “It’s fine, you worry too much." Tubbo paused for a moment. "What’re you here for, bossman?”

Tommy stayed quiet for a moment or two. “I wanted to visit you.” Tommy shrugged.

“I’ve got a human to attend to, so, ma-“

“You’ve what? You’ve made peace with Ranboo?” Tommy said, a shit-eating grin plastered upon his face. Something about his eyes said he was about to bolt through the tunnels and straight out onto the counter to talk to Ranboo. He did.

────────────────────────────────────────────

sdfjgdfds sorry if you had to scroll through that 😅

anyway

#62 in docs is titled 'any thrill will do: notes' and is worldbuilding/plot outline rambles for my quackity au :D

#brickquiries #anon #brickquiries games #mcyt g/t #dsmp g/t #dream smp g/t #dsmp gt #g/t #mw #brickfic #t!tubbo #g!ranboo #t!tommy #unimplied g!wilbur #edsfnjfks this is sooo old i'm surprised i never posted it #i think i wrote this sep-dec 2021 dsfjgefwg #gt #dream smp gt #talking brick

46 notes · View notes

fourseasonsfigs · 9 months

Text

Coda - Beautiful Fight Scene in the Middle of the Lake

What's this? Yet another post on this fig set? Yes indeed! This is a follow up to Building Block Figs - Beautiful Fight Scene in the Middle of the Lake (Part One and Two). It won't make a lot of sense if you haven't read those first, so if you have time, check those out!

For those of you who have read those posts, you may recall that I wasn't really happy with the original design of the lake raft being blue and green, and that you could see the cream colored base:

So, my plan was that when I finished the rest of my building block figs, I'd see what I could do with the leftover bricks. That time has come!

I pulled this fig set back out and took off the figs. I dismantled the base down to the very beginnings, and counted the bricks for the raft. I compared them to my remaining brown bricks, and it seemed like I would just have barely enough, if I was thoughtful about how I used the sizes.

I seemed to have enough blue bricks to use for the base, so I went ahead and made that, expanding the water to cover all sides.

Part of the base is not blue but brown, so I went ahead and started using what I could. You see that this is all the bricks that are left! I wanted to use black in the raft as well for a little more detail, but I didn't have nearly enough black bricks. I also didn't have enough grey bricks to use for further contrast either.

You can also see I have a few transparent bricks for water splashing. The original design used about 2/3 of them, but I liked the look, and figured the more the merrier! I decided to use all of them. There's not a lot of them anyway - those there you can see are all there are.

As you may recall, the original raft used green for the raft and dark blue for the contrast. Maybe to show the water through the bamboo? I'm not sure. I followed the instructions as carefully as I could, substituting the colors, and then trying to add on more clear bricks towards the elevated top to show the froth of the water as the raft came up out of the water.

I meant to take more progress shots, but I have never been a good multi-tasker. It took all my brain power to figure this out! I had to adjust a little bit for the extended base, translate the colors (which was harder in my brain than it should have been) and I had to conserve brown bricks more than I thought I would have to. It was a little more difficult than I expected, but I'm really happy with it! As you can see, I did in fact, go to town with the transparent bricks. I added on some water drips that were most definitely not in the original design.

Here's another view. I really had liked the horizontal lines going through the raft in the original, but I didn't have enough grey bricks in the right shapes to add them. I'm hoping when the next sets arrive that I'll have enough to add them in. In the meantime, I still like this better.

I'll let you be the judge!

I did pull off one of the two cream colored bases (I was like, why did I have two stacked up on each other?), but I realize now it's to elevate the back of the raft up a bit more off the ground. I'm going to put it back.

You can really see where I went to down on the water droplets here. Too much? Maybe! I still kind of like it.

Yeah, having another base underneath won't be visible but will give the elevation back for sure.

The raft is fairly stable - in one area I only had small brown bricks, so it's a little weaker in that area. I tried to reinforce it as much as possible, but rough treatment would probably make one of those back brown pieces fall off. However, this is going right into my fig case, so that's not a concern.

Oops, looks like I need to push down that right side there a bit in the water.

This is really such a cute set. I continue to be charmed by their flying hair!

Ahh, a little more of the water effect! I'm really very pleased with it. Hmm, I also see I'll be pressing down a little bit on that upraised blue brick there in the middle.

You're definitely getting a little more fig detail in these second round of shots!

The transparent bits don't look too overdone from this angle, I think.

Hobo-Xu's goatee here continues to make me giggle. It's so funny!

Oh, I really like the transparent bricks.

Here's the revised underside. Luckily I had a bunch of those long dark blue bricks left.

As you can see, the raft is a little plain now. Which I think is ok, since it puts the attention on the figs themselves. Still, I think it'll be nicer when I finally do revise it a bit with the lateral grey pieces.

Alright, I think 3 posts for one fig set is enough! Thank you for hanging in there with me on this building brick adventure. I'm really looking forward to the next set I get. Unfortunately, it'll just be one...the other two I had ordered off Xianyu both fell through. I'll keep looking though - eventually someone will sell them.

No updated fig counts on this, since this is just a do-over, but if anyone wants to see non-brick figs, the master index is here.

#wenzhou #word of honor #word of honor merch #figthusiast

4 notes · View notes

acertainmoshke · 1 year

Note

Happy WBW! I know it's summer, but we're going back to school! What does the education system look like in your world? Is it standardized or trade based? Required or for certain people only?

Woo! I have a timeline for this!

So, at the "beginning" of Halara's history (the story begins with the creation of a kingdom but the people and culture are much older), almost no one was literate. In fact, Tzelzuzi was not a written language at all, and the few who could write had to use Engian characters, which just didn't work write. But people who served in the Engian military or traveled to the city to test their luck often learned this system of writing, so the earliest Halaran documents are written as such. The first version of written Tselzuzi was created by Consort Ela, the spouse of Kelesh Alik, the second ruler of Halara. Ela spent years perfecting it and then the rest of zir life teaching it to others. Nobles learned it right away, but most adults were too busy for classes and saw little point in writing anyway, so Ela mostly taught children and youth.

For several generations after that, it was expected that parents would teach children, not just their trade, but also to read and write enough to keep track of recipes and send letters. This resulted in incredibly uneven education. Some parents valued writing more than others. Some had never understood it well themselves and focused on passing on the skills they were good at. Noble and royal children were sent to hired tutors who were particularly proficient, while the poorest children had to start working early so their families could eat. Some would be apprenticed in a trade where instructions were written or orders were sent, and for those they may get additional lessons from their mentors.

So, about 250 years into the kingdom, Kelesh Lalosh was ruling. Lalosh was skilled in problem solving and cleaning up messes--actually, much of Lalosh's reign was spent cleaning up the mess made by [their]* stepmother during her brief regency. But Lalosh's spouse, Consort Medu, came from Aled and felt strongly about education. He had wanted to be a teacher, much to the horror of his noble parents, who married him off to another kingdom to avoid it. He spent most of his spouse's reign traveling into town and even to other towns to personally oversee social programs to help people who needed it. And it was he who started a system of public schools.

Public schools in Halara are split into two age groups: 8-10 and 11-13. Upon turning 14, students reach the Age of Apprenticeship and begin to learn a trade. Prior to that their lessons are more general, but very practical: reading, writing, math, nature, basic magics for those empowered. Cooking, sewing, basic woodcraft, art, music, and medicines are taught in rotations.

For the next 200 years, commoner children attended school while noble children continued tutoring, where instead of many of the practical skills they learned diplomacy, negotiation, and other languages. Kelesh Zjolen, only 50 years later, had wanted to send krun children to school but then the war happened and it wasn't safe. Kelesh Lila was the first royal child to attend regular school, but zir family was in excile and it doesn't really count. Zie did, however, grow up to send zir three children to public school even once they were back at court. After that it was considered the norm.

Not all commoner children were equal** either, however. Hypothetically, all children were supposed to be young and free until 8 and then be given equal studies. And children of farmers, bakers, carpenters, merchants, bards, and most other trades did. But it was not entirely unheard of for servant children to leave early to care for younger siblings or help their parents work.

There were over 100 years in which the only choices after school were to apprentice to a tradesmaster or leave the kingdom to try for fortune elsewhere. But around 370 years into the kingdom, the first university was built. It was originally intended as an alternative to apprenticeship and taught (1) the types of lessons reserved for tutored nobles to all attendants, (2) more academic and less practical subjects like astronomy and literature, and (3) trained large groups of students for trades that were badly needed with few tradesmasters to take on apprentices (postmen, sorcerers, scribes to publish manuals, etc). Later wings would be added for purposes such as taking on older students who wished to change trades, educate themselves further, or be better than their master was. One wing began training specialized sorcerers from birth, but that is another matter for another story. The university was not paid and was open to all, but did require a rigorous entrance exam.

* I have not actually assigned genders to all characters yet, and honestly I have trouble remembering who is which sometimes. So when I'm not sure I am temporarily using they/them for characters on here. Obviously in the books all their pronouns will be standard.

** There was no thought for special education until about the same time that nobles began attending public school. "Simple" or "erratic" children (basically anyone with a mental disability or debilitating mental illness) was kept home and taught what the parents could or were willing to. Some learned slowly but well and went on to successful trades. Many others were kept as assistants in their parents' trade their entire life. Children with physical disabilities were sent to school as able but given little accommodation until some of these children grew up and became tutors of younger disabled children.

#moshke writes #writeblr #legends of halara #worldbuilding wednesday #thanks for the ask!

2 notes · View notes

whennnow · 1 year

Text

2020 Wrap-Up

December 30, 2020

This hell year is finally ending, so I wanted to look back at my successes from this year.

Goals

Back in January, I set some sewing goals for myself. My goals were not project-based this year, though that will be changing next year, as you'll see soon.

Goal 1: Stash busting. I did really well with this goal! While my stash isn't significantly smaller, it also wasn't overly large to begin with. Only two projects (my white Regency dress and its petticoat) used exclusively new materials, but that dress has been in the planning stage for upwards of six years so I don't feel the slightest bit bad about it.

Goal 2: Better habits in general, including pressing my seams and not sewing over pins.

I am pleased to announce that I have been pressing all of my seams this year. Unfortunately this led to me finally killing my mom's 25-year-old iron, but I bought a new one which was exciting in its own way.

I think I was good about not sewing over pins too, but it's been a few months since I did any machine sewing and I can't remember. I definitely think about it more, though, so there's that.

Goal 3: Learn embroidery.

I have some embroidery experience, but I jumped at the chance to learn more when a friend pointed me toward "Take a Stitch Tuesday" from PinTangle. Each Tuesday is a chance to learn a new embroidery stitch/technique. I got behind sometimes, but I always caught up!

What did I learn?

Now, better habits isn't the only thing I gained this year. I learned a lot of new skills too!

My first new skill this year was buttonholes. And in the "go big or go home" mindset, my first project of the year involved twelve of them, and I did five more across two different projects later in the year.

Skill number 2 was a zipper. I have never sewn a zipper before in my life, but I managed to set an invisible zipper correctly on the first try! It's amazing what you can do when you read the instructions instead of winging it.

Skills 3 & 4 are using a gridded pattern and (drastically) altering a pattern. I used a gridded pattern as the base for my Regency dress. It was taken from an extant garment, so it was only one size and required some adjustments to fit me. There's also the fact that I was going for a different sort of closure and had to make some additional alterations.

Project Round-Up

The "Girl Detective" Dress, McCall's M7470 (machine construction, hand finishing, needs minor alterations)

A small pillow from the remnants of my curtains (machine sewing)

Green Regency dress alterations (hand and machine sewing)

49 masks - seven to donate, the rest for me and my family (machine sewing)

Vintage Simplicity skirt (machine construction, hand finishing)

Sewed 22 decorative patches onto my denim jacket

1920s brassiere

Regency petticoat (machine sewing)

Additional boning for Regency short stays (handsewn)

Adding buttonholes and a drawstring to my sibling's pajama pants (handsewn)

Faux coral jewelry set - A matching necklace, bracelet, and earrings made using faux red coral beads

White Regency dress (handsewn)

18th century neckerchief/Regecy fichu (handsewn)

Pieced 18th century pockets (started, but unfinished)

Doll-sized shift and petticoat

Followed along with "Take a Stitch Tuesday" (a weekly embroidery challenge) from Pintangle

My creativity and motivation really came in waves this year. The mini pillow, 50s skirt, 20s bra, and some masks were all done in the month of May. Then nothing in June. Then my Regency petticoat and green dress alterations in July and the entire white Regency dress and more masks in August and the first week of September. Later in September I started a pair of heavily pieced 18th century pockets, but it's now December and they're still not done.

I have hope for next year, though. I intend to start strong with some simple machine sewn projects for the sake of stash busting and immediate gratification (namely curtains and pillowcases), then get back to historical sewing (but you'll hear more about that soon ;) ).

I also have a new sewing machine to get acquainted with! I've been using my mother's machine up till now, but back in August I received a second-hand machine from a friend's grandmother (who is in good health, she just wanted a new machine for herself, and my friend already has a machine of his own). It's a different brand than my mother's is and has a lot more knobs and levers, so it's a little intimidating!

I hope you find something positive to hold on to from this year, and I hope you have something to look forward to in the coming year. Take care of yourself and take care of each other.

Stay warm. Stay safe. Stay healthy.

#wnn yearly

0 notes

medicalkink101 · 2 years

Text

Medical Memories 1

I have done a sort of interview with a friend of mine who is a similar Medical role play enthusiast....

Medical Kink 101: Hello so you have a medical examination interest. How long have you had this?

C: I didn't really know it was a thing until I got into reading erotic fiction and finding stories that involved examinations as part of a CMNM dynamic, then of course finding video clips and so on!

Medical Kink 101: Ah yes, and there are a lot of stories featuring medical examinations like on Zity.Biz or Nifty Stories.

C: Yes Nifty was my go to back in the day!

Medical Kink 101: Do you know any good stories you can recommend?

C: Sadly not, all lost to the mists of time at this point!

Medical Kink 101: Well there are a lot of stories! So when you are part of a role play medical, do you have a favourite part of being examined?

C: I suppose it would be the initial rush of getting naked and the exposure

Medical Kink 101: Ah I see, so instead of a particular part of your body being examined

C: Yes, it's the CMNM power dynamic which is of most interest to me

Medical Kink 101: It is certainly very enjoyable. You have recently had a role play medical examination haven't you....

C: Yes

Medical Kink 101: How was that?

C: Great! Very authentic, the doc prides himself on it being an accurate experience as much as possible

Medical Kink 101: Wow it sounds very, very enjoyable. Can you remember anything in particular the doctor said?

C: It's more fun than going for a regular checkup mind you haha :)

Medical Kink 101: Yes quite! Maybe during the examination or when he was asking you to do something?

C: I don't remember any specifics but he was very matter of fact and put me at ease, all felt very natural to be slowly stripped in front of him

Medical Kink 101: Yes, well doctors orders after all!

C: Exactly! A compliant patient following docs instructions

Medical Kink 101: Did he say "turn your head and cough"?

C: Yes

Medical Kink 101: Ok! Can you tell me about that part of the examination?

C: What do you want to know?

Medical Kink 101: Well what happened if the doc did any part of the examination down there. Also were you embarrassed or was it enjoyable?

C: Well by that point I was naked in front of doc, he gently but firmly had hold of my testicle and asked for the requisite cough. I was a little aroused, a little embarrassed but felt very at ease about being on display like this.

Medical Kink 101: Very extensive. I'm assuming it was both testicles....it sounds enjoyable, very realistic and like you are having a real medical inspection! Talking of the whole thing could you explain what the role play doc did from head to toe?

C: Yes, as I say this particular doc prefers to keep things very professional and realistic.

Medical Kink 101: Well that's good to know!

C: So even the rectal exam was very quick and matter of fact, despite being butt naked on an examination table and having a semi the exam was only as long as it needed to be. No attention was given to my arousal, as it wasn't part of the exam.

Medical Kink 101: Did he examine your penis? Were you in an particular positions you had to get into during any parts of the examination. I'm very keen to find out about what happened during your medical experience....let's start from the beginning. So you walked into the doctors "consultation room".....

C: Yes, there was a stool chair set up in the room that I was directed to sit on. We started with ear checks and eye test, before stripping to the waist and checking chest

Medical Kink 101: I assume everything checked out OK? Then what happened?

C: All fine. Eventually removed my jeans to just be in underwear, and eventually those came off too to leave me naked in front of doc.

Medical Kink 101: So when you were just standing in your boxers (I'm assuming you were) how did you feel when you were stripped down? When you were stripped to boxers what did doc do?

C: Asked me to remove them and naturally I did as asked :)

Medical Kink 101: Ah very good! So what examinations happened when you were in your boxers?

C: Um, i think i was laid on the examination table at that point, taking blood pressure, listening to my heartbeat etc

Medical Kink 101: Okay so all part of a standard check up. Hearing the blood pressure machine inflate and being asked to breathe in and out on your chest and back.

C: yep

Medical Kink 101: Okay! And what about your abdominal examination. Could you tell me about that?

C: What do you want to know?

Medical Kink 101: Well what happened really.

C: Well I was laying on the examination bed and then he felt around, asking if I felt any pain as he worked. Apart from the mild discomfort of having somebody prod you, it was all fine though.

Medical Kink 101: Yes so a lot of 'prod prod poke poke'. I'm sure doc felt lightly and then a bit harder. Do you call it your belly, stomach or abdomen? How did feel physically?

C: Stomach I guess?

Medical Kink 101: Ah ok!

C: Physically?

Medical Kink 101: Like did it tickle, hurt at all, gently....what was it like doc touch you there

C: Like I said, a mild discomfort at being probed there, but doc was very careful and I didn't feel any pain

Medical Kink 101: Did he examine your belly button?

C: No haha!

Medical Kink 101: Oh good! Actually going back to probing you said it was a quick prostate exam

C: Yes, again to go with his realistic approach doc was very matter of fact and performed the exam efficiently.

Medical Kink 101: Just as he should have! So did it hurt, his finger going in and having a poke about? Or should I say probe.

C: No, again he was very gentle and professional about it.

Medical Kink 101: That's good to know. Actually what position were you in?

C: On all fours, head down low, bottoms up haha

Medical Kink 101: Bet you weren't drinking then! Actually a good position for your testicles to be given a cursory examination again in that position!

C: Quite haha!

Medical Kink 101:Hang on, you didn't get that examination again - testicles examined when you were on all fours?

C: No I think I was stood up for that part.

Medical Kink 101: So just a quick feel and "cough please".

C: Yes.

Medical Kink 101: I see! And is there any else you want to mention about the medical?

C: Nothing springing to mind no.

Medical Kink 101: Okay, well on that note its been a pleasure to chat with you as part of the first Medical Memories! Thank you C 🩺

0 notes

helloalycia · 3 years

Text

teenage dirtbag [two] // wanda maximoff

summary: your crush begins to get more intense for Wanda, ensuing awkwardness between you both

warning/s: none

author's note: so glad you’re all liking this, here’s part two! 🥰

I knew it was a dream as soon as it began. Dreams never tricked me as I always detected something didn't feel right and figured out it wasn't real. But that was my only 'talent' with dreams, as everything else was left down to my subconscious. I couldn't control them, break away from the script or deviate from the scene in any way. I just knew when it wasn't real.

Admittedly, it took a little longer for me to recognise this one was a dream compared to others I'd had. It just seemed so normal as I headed into Chemistry class, seeing other students filing in and joining their partners. Mr. Hale was at the front of the class, occupied by his laptop and the projector, and it felt like any other day at school. The lights were off and the blinds were closed slightly, leaving the room in darkness except for the light from the board.

"Are we watching a film or something?" I asked Wanda as I set my bag on the desk beside her, earning her attention.

She looked up from her notepad and smiled widely, blue eyes sparkling in the darkness. "You're here, you took forever!"

"You saw me two lessons ago," I teased, taking a seat beside her.

She moved closer to me, hands immediately moving to my left one, playing with my fingers mindlessly. It felt right at the time, but I knew deep down that this wasn't real. In what world would this happen?

"Still," she mumbled adorably, before meeting my eyes. "We're watching some video about the periodic table."

I hummed, glancing at Mr. Hale as he struggled to pull up the video.

"Thank God because I couldn't be bothered doing work," Wanda added with a sigh, before moving closer to me, leaning on the palm of her hand as the other held mine still. "D'you think you can cover for me whilst I sneak in a nap?"

I stifled a laugh, moving closer and admiring the way her eyes changed colour in the light from the board. "I'm sure you're supposed to be paying attention."

She scrunched her nose, an uninterested smile on her lips, and it made my heart flutter.

"Fine, I'll cover for you," I gave in easily, before pressing a kiss to her nose.

She giggled quietly and when I pulled back, she leaned in and kissed my lips. Her free hand moved to the back of my neck as I rested mine on her lap, closing my eyes and falling into her without question. Okay, so yeah, definitely a dream, but I wasn't complaining.

"If Miss Maximoff and Miss Y/L/N can kindly stop making out, then we can begin the lesson," Mr. Hale announced, breaking Wanda and I's kiss.

Some of the class snickered as we separated from each other's hold, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. He gave us a fed up look.

"Thank you," he said, before erupting into a speech about today's lesson.

When he started the video, I leaned forward on the desk to get comfortable and felt Wanda do the same, leaning her head on my arm and continuing to play with my hand. I smiled to myself, kissing the top of her head gently before getting comfortable. It all seemed too good to be true, but God was it a nice thought.

When I woke up the next morning with butterflies in my stomach, I groaned loudly. I knew I'd screwed myself over. I was in too deep. Dreaming about Wanda was not good, not good at all...

And it definitely didn't help when I showed up to class that same day, approaching my table and an already-seated Wanda. Just a dream, I told myself as I took a seat. Not real. And not a big deal.

"Good morning," she greeted when I sat down and pulled my books out. Her usual picture perfect smile was on her lips as she pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "How are you?"

Trying my best not to think about my dream, I gave her a small smile. "G-good, yeah."

Fuck me, why did I stutter?

"You sure? You seem distracted," she noticed, making me swallow hard and look away from her piercing gaze.

"Yeah," I managed to say without stuttering once again. "Just tired. What about you?"

"Same," she said with a breathy chuckle, her leg brushing mine under the table and making me freeze. She didn't seem to notice as she continued, "I stayed up late binge-watching Netflix. Probably the wrong choice, but here we are."

I bit my lip to contain a laugh, relaxing a little. It was just a dream. She wasn't that bad. I was fine!

Class started and Mr. Hale was explaining something about doing a practical experiment today, but if I'm being honest, I was barely listening. Stuck in a daydream, I was wiggling my pen in my right hand and staring at the display behind Mr. Hale's head mindlessly.

Suddenly, a warm hand rested on mine, pressing it to the table and stopping me from shaking my pen. I shit you not, my heart stopped when I saw Wanda smirking playfully at me.

"D'you mind?" she asked, clearly finding my wiggling pen distracting.

All I could think about was how soft and warm her hand was, and then I became aware of her bare leg still brushing against mine – she just had to wear a dress today, didn't she? – and then the fact that she was still staring at me with amusement dancing in her eyes. My dream from last night returned to mind as she was still yet to remove her hand and I was lucky I managed to find my words as I choked out a response.

"S-sorry," I said, frozen in place, yet again, by Wanda's presence.

She snickered, shaking her head at my dismay, before finally letting go of my hand. I licked my lips nervously and let go of my pen, but not quite finding the energy to move my hand. I could still feel the warmth of her hand lingering on mine and, oh God, this was getting worse by the second. Why did I have to have that stupid dream?!

Clearly distracted by my own stupidity, I failed to realise that Mr. Hale had let us begin with our experiment, whatever that may be as I wasn't listening. Wanda was nudging me slightly, bringing me back into reality, and said something about getting lab coats and goggles whilst I got the bunsen burner.

I watched her leave and massaged my head, telling myself to get my act together. I was not the stupid cliché of a girl who acted nervous around her crush. I was better than that, goddamn it.

After getting the bunsen burner, I hooked it up to the gas tap as Wanda returned with our lab coats and safety goggles. We both put them on before Wanda gave me a knowing look, humoured smile tugging at her lips. I was beginning to hate (love) that look.

"You totally weren't paying attention during that, were you?" she asked, but she definitely already knew the answer.

"'Course I was," I played it cool, before wandering over to the handout on our desk. "We're doing an experiment."

She chuckled as I distracted myself with reading the instructions.

"So it says the first instruction is to boil some water in a beaker," I said with a nod. "Seems easy enough. Just gotta get a beaker."

My mouth went dry when Wanda hunched down on the desk, reading the paper between us. I hoped she couldn't hear how fast my heart was beating in my chest.

"You think you can manage that one?" she teased, glancing up at me with that same playful smirk on her lips.

Her eyes twinkled with mischief, similar to the one her twin possessed on a regular basis, and I'd never felt more stuck in place in my life than I did now. Without thinking, my gaze lowered to her lips and I realised then and there how badly I wanted to feel her lips against mine for real. She was so close I could move forward a mere few inches and feel it, but I didn't.

"Y-yeah, I'll get it now," I stumbled out, before literally stumbling over the stool as I made a move to leave.

I tried to ignore the way her gaze followed me and instead focused on getting to the beakers without passing out. To my relief, Y/BF/N was also collecting a beaker for him and his partner, too. When I stopped by his side, he looked up to see who it was, then smiled.

"You alright?" he asked, sensing my panic.

I shook my head frantically. "Definitely not. This is really bad, Y/BF/N."

Y/BF/N furrowed his brows, making me give him the look, to which he eventually followed what I meant.

"What happened?" he asked, trying (and failing) to hide his amusement.

I made sure nobody was nearby or could hear us before admitting, "I had a dream."

He raised his eyebrows suggestively, making me slap him on the arm quickly.

"Not that kind of dream, you perv," I clarified, before sighing. "But a dream. About you-know-who. And it threw me off and now I can't seem to act like a human."

He snorted as he tried not to laugh. I glared at him, shoving him again, making him laugh out loud.

"I'm sorry," he defended. "It's just– you've got it bad."

"Very helpful." I narrowed my eyes.

"Look, it's new which is why you're all awkward," he said knowingly, collecting his beaker. "It'll eventually pass when you get used to it. Until then, try not to do anything stupid."

"Too late," I mumbled under my breath.

He patted me reassuringly before leaving. I grabbed a beaker and turned around, deciding to take it easy. I'd get over it. I always did. I wasn't stupid. Yeah, I wasn't stupid. I had this!

But that thinking immediately went out the window when I approached our workspace and saw Wanda leaning on the desk, looking over the handout with thought. Her hair was pulled back for safety reasons, exposing her tensed jaw and pursed lips. She was wearing her lab coat over her black, knee-length dress and I'm not gonna lie, she looked extremely sexy today because she was wearing matching black knee-high boots. I gulped.

God help me.

—

You'd be relieved to know that my crush on Wanda died down after a while. Not in the way that I no longer had a crush on her – God knew I was overflowing with feelings for her – but in the way that I was getting a lot better at hiding it.

Which was perfect for when I saw her with her dick of a boyfriend. You'd be surprised how many times he kept popping up. And when he did, I always seemed to want to strangle him.

This time, I was working my new part-time job at a pizza place in town. Y/BF/N was keeping me company on my shift by taking extra long to finish his pizza so we could talk at the counter. I was drying some glasses as we spoke when the door to the parlour opened and the bell jingled, signalling new customers.

"I believe that's your cue," Y/BF/N teased, making me roll my eyes playfully.

My gaze wandered to the door where I saw a small group of teens walking in and finding a seat. It took me a second to realise that it was actually Wanda and her friends, including her boyfriend, who were looking for a table. My eyes widened with surprise as she looked around. Her eyes found mine and an excited smile appeared on her face as she waved to me.

"This just keeps getting better," Y/BF/N said when he saw Wanda heading our way, thankfully without her friends.

I pinched him before straightening up and plastering my best customer service smile on my lips. Wanda stopped before me, smiling between Y/BF/N and I.

"Hey, guys," she greeted brightly, to which Y/BF/N smiled in return, before looking my way and making my stomach flip at how pretty she looked today. "Y/N, I didn't know you worked here!"

"Yeah, it's kinda new," I answered coolly. "Gotta get that extra money, right?"

She nodded before grabbing the tip of my cap on my head and wiggling it, letting out a laugh. "You look adorable in your uniform, I must say."

I forgot how to breathe as she let go of my cap, her eyes still glittering with joy. Y/BF/N tried to hide his laughter as he sipped his drink, meanwhile I felt my neck heating up with embarrassment.

"Th-thanks," I got out nervously. I know what you're thinking – I said I got better at hiding my crush. And I have! I just– why did she have to put me on the spot like this?!

"I should get back," she said after a moment, pointing over her shoulder towards her friends. "But it was nice seeing you. Are you serving us?"

I nodded, regaining composure. "I'll be over in a minute. Give you chance to pick something."

"Awesome," she said sweetly, flashing me a final smile before heading back to her friends.

I released a shaky breath when she left, taking my cap off and massaging my head momentarily.

"I feel like she flirts with you just to see what happens," Y/BF/N said with amusement.

"It's just her personality," I mumbled, before putting my cap back on and taking a deep breath. "Time to work."

I continued to do my job as usual, thankfully not being affected by Wanda's presence, and took their orders. It was pretty uneventful as I served them their food and continued to hang with Y/BF/N by the counter. Every time I'd look over at her out of bad habit, I'd feel uneasy at the sight of Nate having his hands all over her. I mean, obviously he could – he was her boyfriend – but admittedly, I was a little jealous. I tried to ignore the feeling by busying myself with other things.

Wanda's friends were being a little noisier and rowdier than I'd liked, but it wasn't particularly busy so I saw no need to shut them up. Yeah, in hindsight, maybe I should have.

Clearing a table after some customers left, I balanced a tray of glasses in my hand and headed back to the counter. But on the way, a football came out of nowhere and got launched at my chest, making me drop the tray onto the floor with a loud crash. The rowdiness from Wanda's table ceased momentarily, as did the chatter from other customers, and I looked up to see Nate and his friends watching me, trying to suppress laughter.

"I am so sorry," Nate called with anything but guilt.

"Shit, Y/N, you okay?" Y/BF/N said, racing to my side in an instant.

I nodded, clenching my jaw, and bent down to clean up the mess. My boss must have heard the commotion as she came out from the kitchen and saw what happened, putting two and two together.

"Right, all of you out," she ordered without questioning anything, looking to Nate and the rest of the table. "We don't tolerate that tomfoolery here."

They groaned their complaints, but I didn't bother looking up to see, instead focusing on cleaning up the mess. Luckily for me, the tray took most of the hit rather than my chest, so unlike last time, I wasn't hurt.

"You're lucky I'm not charging you for the broken glasses, honey," my boss continued to scold Nate as he walked past, grabbing his football.

I saw feet shuffling past me, presuming it was their table leaving, and focused on picking up the large shards of glass and putting them on the tray. Y/BF/N helped out, even though he didn't need to, and I smiled at him as he knelt opposite me doing the same.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry," Wanda's voice grabbed my attention, making me look up. She had a guilty frown on her lips as she looked between the mess and I.

I stood up, shaking my head. "It's fine. It's–" But I stopped speaking, instead letting out an exhausted sigh. "No offence, but your boyfriend is a dick."

She pressed her lips together, not saying anything. I felt bad for saying it, but this was the second time he'd hit me with his stupid ball. It was true.

"I should clean this up," I mumbled, avoiding her eyes. "See you at school."

She opened her mouth to say something, but decided against it. I knelt down and continued to clean up, hoping she'd walk away already. This was awkward enough as it was.

"See you guys at school," she finally spoke, making me pause. "Sorry, again."

Y/BF/N bid her a goodbye before she left for good. I let out another sigh, deciding not to say anything as I continued cleaning up. It would never make sense to me why someone as lovely as Wanda would be with someone as obnoxious as Nate. I guess I'd never know.

—

Since that lovely incident at the pizza parlour, things had been a little distant between Wanda and I. Mostly on my part if I'm being honest. I couldn't help it – the whole situation had been uncomfortable and embarrassing, making it impossible to return to how we usually were.

This meant that Wanda was the one to come to me and check in, which I definitely wasn't expecting.

I was at home one afternoon, hanging with my older sister who was staying with us for a week. She'd moved out a year ago, getting her own place a few towns over, so I missed her presence a lot. I took advantage of her weekly visit by having a catch up as we played basketball in the front drive.

Disclaimer: none of us were good at basketball, but the hoop came with the house and it was simply tradition for us to attempt to shoot baskets as we had a catch up. Only, this time, as we were talking, a loud car engine pulled us from our chat and we both spun around to see an unfamiliar car parking up.

"That must be mum's customer," Y/S/N realised, holding the basketball underneath her arm. She glanced at me with a quirked brow. "You think we're gonna get roped into helping?"

"Most definitely," I answered with a chuckle, and just on cue, our mum opened the garage door behind us.

She was a florist and had a large pick-up delivery for a customer today. Apparently they were a good friend, so she had the flowers delivered to our house and they were waiting in our garage until now.

"Can you girls give me a hand?" she asked my sister and I, motioning for us to go to her. "I'm gonna say hi. Just start bringing the crates out, yeah?"

We both saluted playfully before watching her go to the customer's car. My jaw dropped when I saw who it was – Wanda's mum. And to top things off, Wanda and Pietro were both with her, the three of them getting out of their car and greeting my mum with smiles on their faces.

"You cool?" my sister asked, nudging me slightly.

I closed my mouth, straightening up. "Yeah, yeah, duh."

She gave me a funny look but grabbed a crate and began to leave it in the drive for the moment. I swallowed the lump in my throat and did the same, knowing both Wanda and Pietro were approaching us after my mum pointed them our way.

"Y/N, hey," Wanda said, stopping before my sister and I. She gave my sister a friendly smile before looking to me with nervous eyes. "It's good to see you."

I tried to say something – anything – but my words got stuck in my throat and all that came out was a weird noise. Partially because of the awkwardness between us at my fault and partially because of how pretty she looked in her sundress.

"Hi, I'm Y/S/N," my sister cut in, noticing my quietness. She gave me a sideways glance before looking to the twins. "It's Wanda and Pietro, right?"

"Yeah," Wanda said with a smile, eyes lingering on mine before looking to my sister. "We're just helping our mum out to load the car."

"I'm the muscle," Pietro joked, lifting his bicep, making Wanda roll her eyes jokingly.

"Okay, muscle, you can come help me get these out the garage," my sister played along before looking to Wanda and I. "You guys okay to load the car?"

Wanda nodded. "Sure thing."

Y/S/N grabbed Pietro, who shot me a friendly smile, before leaving Wanda and I alone.

"Your sister seems nice," Wanda tried to make conversation as we both grabbed a crate and took it to the back of her mum's car.

"Yeah," I agreed uncomfortably. "She's just visiting."

Wanda hummed in acknowledgment, neither of us knowing what else to say. We walked past our chatting mothers before setting the crates in the back of her mum's car.

"Are we okay?" Wanda asked suddenly, as soon as our hands were free. I looked to her and saw she was debating something internally before looking to me. "I mean, I know we're okay, but I just– I feel like you've been off since, well... since Nate threw that ball at you."

My neck heated up with embarrassment as I cleared my throat; my eyes fell to the flowers in the crates.

"I really am sorry," she apologised again, resting a hand on my forearm, sending shivers up my spine. "He can be such a jerk sometimes. Does stuff without thinking."

"You don't need to apologise," I said, finally lifting my eyes to meet her anxious green ones. And I meant it – Nate's idiocy wasn't her fault and it was harsh of me to make her seem like it was. I sighed, knowing my distant behaviour would end here. "We're good, Wanda."

She still seemed uncertain. "You sure?"

I gave her my best smile, hoping she knew I meant it. "I'm sure."

Her tense shoulders relaxed and a relieved smile spread across her face. "Okay, good. I'm glad."

She held my gaze and I just knew my heart was beating too fast to be useful as she did. She was just so beautiful.

"You know, the whole point of splitting into teams was to be done quicker," Pietro's voice interrupted our staring contest.

He stepped between us, glancing between us with amusement, before setting a crate in the back of the car.

"Right, yeah, we were just on our way back," I said, smiling sheepishly.

Pietro smirked. "No harm no foul, princess."

I was taken aback slightly as he called me that, and even more taken aback when he plucked a flower from the crate and offered it my way.

"For you," he said, half joking and half serious.

Unsure what to say, I accepted the flower. "Er, thanks... I think."

Wanda crossed her arms behind him, eyes narrowed in his direction. I wondered what she was thinking, but never got the chance to ask as their mum's voice called out to us.

"Pietro, I paid to use the bouquets," she said with mild distress, "not so you could ruin them."

His cheeks flushed as he called back, "Sorry!"

I tried not to laugh as the three of us headed back to get the rest of the crates, being sure to set the flower to the side. We ended up filling her car with the bouquets before facing our parents as we bid them a goodbye.

"They're lovely, Y/M/N," Wanda's mum was complimenting the flowers. "Thank you again."

My mum patted her back. "Anytime, dear." She looked between the twins and my sister and I. "Thank you all for helping out."

Y/S/N and I smiled her way as Wanda's mum nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes, thank you!" she added, looking to Y/S/N and I. "It's so great to see you all together. Especially you two, Wanda and Y/N. It's nice to know you're good friends after so long of barely speaking."

Wanda's face was beginning to turn pink as I'm sure mine was doing the same.

"Yes, I agree," my mum said with a smile. "Anyway, we won't keep you any longer. Good luck with the banquet!"

Wanda and Pietro waved goodbye to Y/S/N and I before joining their mum in the car. I followed her figure subconsciously, butterflies floating in my stomach until their car was gone.

"Damn, I really missed a lot," Y/S/N said when they were gone, wrapping an arm over my shoulder and tugging me closer. "You're crushing hard."

Instantly, I looked to her. "What? What are you talking about?"

She rolled her eyes, letting go of me. "So we're playing that game. Okay. I'll bite."

As she began to walk away, I chased after her. "What game? Y/S/N? What are you talking about?"

She merely laughed and allowed me to chase her, wondering how the hell she knew of my crush on Wanda. Was I that obvious?

#wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff imagine #elizabeth olsen #marvel #mcu #marvel imagine #mcu imagine

621 notes · View notes

twocubes · 2 years

Note

I'd love a reading, if you please. I did something unprecedented(for me), and I have no conscious memory of how and why it got started or most of the happening itself, only being able to piece back together around the bits that I got outside corroborating evidence for. What I can confidently relay is that I was hunting something very dangerous, and that I failed to put an end to it.

If your wonderful new tool can provide any insight I'd be flush with gratitude <3

so... this one went a bit... weird

i decided to try something a bit experimental, which... well it would make more sense to do it like this if you were the one doing it, or if we had more direct feedback between us, but. i mean i guess it's worth trying

i'm calling this a binary cartomantic why-because analysis.

the idea is, you start out with the card at the top, which represents the situation at hand.

you then ask the question, "why did this happen?" and the answer will be that it happened because of two things, which are represented by the two cards below

each of these causes is necessary (the situation couldn't have happened if even one of the causes didn't occur) and both of them together are sufficient (the situation would definitely happen if both of the causes occurred)

you then iterate to get causes for those causes, and so on and so forth

now, if you were doing this alone, you could focus on parts where things were less resolved and like. not expand parts that don't need to be expanded.

unfortunately i'm doing this for you, so, it's going to be up to you to figure out when things cease to be useful.

ok. here we go.

situation: NOT A NUMBER OF HEARTS, reversed NOT A NUMBER is... something i've been dreading. The instructions I wrote down are to go into a trance, or have a dream, or drop acid, or the such. which is rather involved and... well, difficult to control or manage and as always HEARTS is to do with perpetuance, survival, health, etc

so this is where it starts getting weird. having drawn this card, and because there's no point to testing this deck if I don't follow my instructions, I... sorta stared at this? like, i figured, it's reversed, so my instinct was that I could just tell you to have a dream, but like, I couldn't really continue the reading without something like that since this was the root card, so... well, i went to sleep and set my brain to "remember"

unfortunately the thing I got wasn't very helpful, unless there was something that would make sense to you in trying and failing to save the life of some non-existant communist leader on a road in Lausanne (???) so I was kind of at a loss as to how to continue

so you can imagine my surprise upon checking my inbox to see that your problem was in fact one of figuring out some dreams, and that you'd sent me a description of them

so uh. well, i mean, fuck, yknow? these fucking cards.

anyways. so the suit is hearts, which corresponds at the very least to like. the question of your friend's friend's health in that dream? or, as indicated by that dream. idk you seem to have more experience here. also i suppose the peril here is a good way to interpret the reversal here...

ok. So, why did this happen?

cause 1: ZERO OF HEARTS ZERO is an absence; it could be an absence of obstruction (so, freedom) or a process that hasn't been started yet or... whatever

cause 2: E OF CLUBS, reversed E is to do with exponential growth; with stuff building up unnoticeably until it suddenly explodes CLUBS is labor

so, ok, let's start with the second one. going by what you described as to what your situation was, a guess could be that you'd been... well, accidentally putting a lot of work in your unusual dream thing, and this has resulted in a sudden change

the first one i... want to interpret it as a birth, of sorts? the beginning of a new form of perpetuance. maybe your friend's friend — or something wearing their form — has joined you in this place that your grandpa uh. where that thing happened. and this is a new, sort of, life for them

for these to together result in the scenario you described, well, i guess, "you" ("you" in quotes means the predator whose perspective you took, while you without quotes just means... you) were growing, unconsciously, like in an egg, and that egg finally hatched? and, i guess, the newly hatched thing that you were then connected to resulted in you waking with a head filled with thoughts and... idk, that was the perspective you were following when "you" were hunting later, clumsily and instinctively, like a newborn

certainly this couldn't have happened if "you" hadn't hatched, and certainly this couldn't have happened if your friend's (maybe) friend hadn't coincidentally been around then, but just the same, these two things happening at the same time would surely cause this result

ok. so, why did these happen?

first, why was your "friend's friend" there:

cause 1-1: OMEGA PLUS ONE OF SPADES, reversed OMEGA PLUS ONE is like, the consequences of the thing you're working towards even if you might never attain it; the question "and then what?", that sort of thing SPADES is to do with material contradictions, conflicts, etc

cause 1-2: XIV OPEN AIR XIV OPEN AIR is to do with environmental factors, a wider perspective, the phrase "go touch grass", all that

ok. so. your "friend's friend" (if that is what they are) appeared in this dream as a hypothetical consequence of a conflict that may or may not ever end?

that and something to do with the wider environmental factors affecting this situation

so... maybe End (or some other such) wanted to figure out something about the situation they find themselves in, and brought this friendsfriend to help with that somehow

net, why did you hatch?

cause 2-1: KING OF SPADES, reversed the KING is that which must be protected absolutely; that which when lost, ends the game

cause 2-2: THREE OF CLUBS, reversed THREE is a basic building block, a fundamental unit

so, 2-1 I guess would mean some kind of crucial separation breaking? like, before this there was a conflict between you and "you" and this has resolved with the breaking of the shell, mixing you two together... or something idk

while 2-2 I'd interpret as like. incomplete foundations in the work you were doing (growing).

so, "you" didn't go through some basic steps in "your" growth and the shell between you and "you" broke, causing you to mix (which thus resulted in this situation you were perceiving). like, you filled in the holes in "you"

next. why was End (or whoever) trying to figure things out using your friend's friend?

cause 1-1-1: THE CARD WITH THE RULES ON IT, reversed the CARD WITH THE RULES ON IT represents the literature, and more generally our embodied storage of knowledge; consulting it, adding to it, all that

cause 1-1-2: JACK OF CLUBS, reversed JACK is everyday, implicit, anodyne help; the sort you might take for granted eventually.

Ok. so, I'd guess here that "End" didn't find this in the literature and also doesn't have anyone helping them do stuff like this, so, they went ahead and just did whatever they thought would help most, without really following... whatever procedures you're supposed to here. idk i don't follow high-dimensional procedural politics.

next, why did environmental factors cause "End" to do these sorts of experiments?

cause 1-2-1: UP ARROW OF CLUBS UP ARROW represents a fragile advantage; you're winning, but if the world gets even a smidge of a chance, this could all be reversed

cause 1-2-2: CAVALIER OF SPADES CAVALIER is exceptional help; it's the cavalry riding in to save the day, etc

So... hm. "End" is in a situation where their work is juuust barely squeaking by, and they're looking for a sort of sudden help to defeat the contradiction that they're trying to resolve through their labor?

next, why did the shell between you and "you" break?

cause 2-1-1: EPSILON-ZERO OF SPADES, reversed EPSILON-ZERO is to do with the unimaginably wide breadth of all the things that could exist in the universe

cause 2-1-2: XIX WINTER, reversed XIX WINTER is a harsh period. it is the fallow time between harvest and sowing seeds again, a time when you have to endure, before you can start building up again.

uhm... i guess, for the second, you went through some harsh periods that you didn't fully endure, and this resulted in a weakening of the shell, and... a collection of problems too fast to be fully imagined were not resolved?

finally, why did "you" skip these basic steps in "your" development?

cause 2-2-1: ELEVEN OF SPADES ELEVEN is things that should be familiar, but in practice aren't. stuff you studied but can't remember, rusty skills, people you've hung out with but don't understand, all that.

cause 2-2-2: ONE OF SPADES ONE is something being full, or complete, or fully there, or all that.

so, i guess, "you" in your growth were given an obstruction that was entirely unavoidable, but despite it being in principle something "you" should have been able to do, "you" fumbled, and fucked it up.

so, uhm. congratulations on your new alien headmate, i guess? uhh

EDIT: oh i forgot: 3 + 11 = 14 = XIV OPEN AIR; this suggests that the external conditions that "End" (or whoever) was trying to figure out were a consequence of "you" fumbling and missing some basic building blocks?

idk maybe this helped maybe it didn't. whew. this was a lot of work END OF READING

thanks for requesting a reading from dorothy twocubes' 24-hour bad advice hour™!

please leave some feedback or a tip if you want to, or don't, it's your choice, and I respect that

#nouveau tarot nouveau

12 notes · View notes

webslinger-holland · 4 years

Text

Baby Holland | Tom Holland

Summary: A compilation of cute little moments during the reader’s unplanned pregnancy with Baby Holland…

Warning: major cuteness and mentions of pregnancy

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Type: Oneshot (I will write more of these if requested)

MASTERLIST

The early morning sun was starting to rise. The vibrant colors of the sunrise were spreading across the long length of the skyline. The yellow sunlight was filtering through the light white clouds, signaling the end of the rainy season. The air was very clear.

The air was so cold yet the trees were on fire. The leaves were showcasing those nice vibrant colors of red, orange, and yellow. The grass was just starting to dry out in the fall season. The water droplets were lingering on the tops of the velvety green leaves of the large forest trees. The puddles were making the ground nice and damp. It was fall.

The pretty songbirds were flying through the blue skyline, heading towards the rough dry ground. The little birds were hopping around, pecking at the ground. Afterwards, the little birds would return back to the quaint little nests in the heights of the tallest trees. A new batch of little baby birds were lingering in the rustic contents of the warm nest, opening their little beaks in a demanding manner. The little squeaks of the baby birds were signaling the beginning of their never ending appetites.

At the given moment, Y/N had been sleeping the whole morning away with her dear sweet husband. She could feel her husband’s forearm wrapped around her waist, gently coaxing her into his grasp. Her back was pressed against his bare chest, so she wasn’t able to see his sleeping figure. She weaved her fingers through his own that lay across her stomach, savoring the sweet moment between the two of them.

However, she could feel this strong wave of nausea taking over her senses. Her stomach was lurching in a rough manner, gurgling with the most unpleasant noise. She tasted something tangy at the back of her throat. She tried to force down the bile, but it wouldn’t do any good.

Without hesitation, Y/N had forced herself to scramble out of her bed. She had hurried towards the master bathroom, slamming the wood door open in desperation. She didn’t even acknowledge that the noise had awoken her sleeping husband. She dropped down to her knees in front of the toilet bowl, feeling the vomit coming up her throat.

Her body heaved. She couldn’t seem to stop the chunks of food covered in the creamy chyme from coming out of her mouth. Her stomach kept on contracting violently and forcing everything out of her system.

She didn’t even notice the gentle fingers pulling her long hair out of her face. Her dear husband was towering over her smaller figure, staring down at her with a look of concern on his face. He rubbed her back in a very soothing manner, whispering some words of encouragement to her.

The vomit came up looking like clam chowder and smelling like pure acid. The wave of nausea was slowly starting to subside within her body. The pungent stench invaded her nostrils and she heaved even though there was nothing left in her.

Her throat felt sore from the stomach acid that was layering it. Her mouth was coated in the strong aftertaste of her own vomit. Her soft eyes were starting to water at the awful feeling in her stomach. She whimpered to herself. She just felt absolutely horrible. And she had for quite some time.

“This is the fifth time this week,” Tom claimed. He did not hesitate to lean down to plant a soft kiss on the top of her head. He slipped his hand around her body, rubbing her stomach to soothe her. He looked down at her. “Don’t you think we should take you to see the doctor?” Tom questioned.

“I am sure that it’s nothing to worry about, Tom.” She dismissed him. She wiped the back of her hand against her mouth, cleaning the small amount of residue forming at the corner of her mouth. She made a noise of disgust. “We had dinner at that exotic place that week. It just didn’t agree with me,” she claimed.

“I would still like to be sure,” Tom whispered. He turned his head to look down at her, waiting for some kind of response. He could see the faint nodding of her head, which meant that she was compliant with him. He smiled at her weakly. “I am gonna get your coat and shoes,” Tom said.

Slowly, Tom excused himself to that he could gather their things. He walked into the bedroom, heading towards the dresser on the other side of the room. He pulled out a random shirt, throwing it over his head. He also grabbed one of his old sweatshirts. He took the car keys off the top of the dresser.

Meanwhile, Y/N had closed the lid of the toilet. She flushed the contents of her stomach, so that she wouldn't have to look or smell it every again. She forced herself to stand to her feet, feeling slightly uneasy with each step. She stood in front of the mirror, staring at her own reflection in the glass mirror.

She looked absolutely miserable. She had these dark circles underneath her eyes from the distinct lack of sleep. Her long locks of hair were tangled and tousled with knots. She wasn’t wearing any makeup either, which only added to the fact that she looked like a complete mess. She almost couldn’t stand to look at herself.

For some unknown reason, Y/N had thought of something that was given to her a long time ago. She wondered if that thing might be able to help her identify whatever was happening to her body. She also knew exactly where she had kept the little trinket.

Hesitantly, Y/N had dropped back down to her knees in front of the cupboard underneath the sink. She opened the doors of the cabinet. She started searching through the various feminine supplies and rolls of toilet paper, finding the little box at the back of the cupboard. She held a pregnancy test in her hands.

She could clearly remember when the pregnancy test was given to her. It was on the night of her bachelorette party nearly two years ago. It had been a gift from her closest friends. It was meant to be a sort of ‘gag gift.’

She didn’t think much of it at that time. She simply threw it under her sink so that—if she ever needed it—she would be able to find it easily in its convenient spot. Now she would finally have need of it after two years.

With shaky hands, Y/N flipped the small box over so that she would be able to read the instructions. She lifted her hand to close the bathroom door, heading back towards the toilet bowl. She was able to finish every single step within a few moments. She set the test on the back of the bowl.

In the meantime, Y/N was trying to brush her teeth in the most thorough manner. She just wanted to get the disgusting taste of bile out of her mouth. When she had finished brushing her teeth, she had decided to splash some water on her face. She cleaned her hands with a small towel, glancing towards the small test through the corner of her eye. It wouldn’t be long now.

The small cheap beeping noise had started coming from the pregnancy test on the back of the toilet bowl. The final result would either show one line for negative or two lines for positive. It wasn’t the most accurate thing sometimes.

She had forced herself to walk towards the small test. She was very hesitant to take the test into her hands, but she was able to do it. She had dropped her gaze to stare down at the results, feeling her breath hitching in the back of her throat. She could see two evident lines on the test. She was pregnant.

Slowly, Y/N had walked out of the bathroom with the small test in her hands. She had watched her husband scurrying around the bedroom in attempts to collect every single little thing that they might need for the drive. She called his name.

“Are you ready to go?” Tom questioned. He had turned to look towards her in his own place, but he had stopped in his tracks upon seeing the fresh tears gathering in her eyes. His heart had practically dropped into his stomach at the mere sight. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Tom wondered.

“It’s not food poisoning,” Y/N whispered. She had shook her head at her own comment. She had forced herself to swallow the heavy lump lingering at the back of her throat. She could feel the new salty tears streaming down her face.

“It’s not? What is it then?” Tom challenged. He had shifted to take one single step forward in his place, staring at her with a strong hint of curiosity in his brown eyes. He couldn’t imagine what would have been wrong.

“I’m...I’m pregnant,” Y/N choked on her own choice of words. She was hesitant to show him the small test in her hands. She could feel a sudden buildup of emotions gathering in the back of her mind, which took over her senses with such ease. She didn’t know how her husband was going to react.

However, Tom was barely able to process his own emotions that were coursing through his train of thought. He felt a strong sense of shock and surprise, but he also felt an insane amount of happiness in the depths of his heart. He couldn’t even find the right words to express his emotions to her.

“You’re pregnant?” Tom whispered.

“It makes sense,” Y/N claimed. She was quick to list the various symptoms that she had been experiencing lately that would have correlated with the signs of pregnancy. “I have been so nauseas recently. I have these mood swings all the time. I didn’t even realize it at first, but I was also late on my period.” She confessed.

Her husband was still trying to process the mere thought in his mind. He was almost thinking too hard about it. He had only briefly talked about having kids with her. He told her that he wanted to wait a few years after they had gotten married. He defiantly wasn't expecting this, but he was completely overjoyed at the thought.

“You are angry with me. You said that you didn’t want to have any kids right away—” she had started to ramble.

“What? No!” Tom exclaimed. He took a few steps in his place. He stood directly in front of her. He brought his hands to the sides of her face, rubbing her cheeks with the pad of his thumb. He could feel the smile growing at the corners of his lips. “I am just surprised. We are having a baby,” Tom sighed.

In response, Y/N found herself smiling at his sweet words. She had released a small breathy laugh before nodding her head in confirmation. She stared up at him with a spark in her eyes, thinking about their bright future together with a little one on the way. She couldn’t wait for it.

His lips brush against her own in the most passionate kiss. His lips was warm and gentle. He slanted her head further, deepening the kiss. His hands were wrapped around her waist and her arms locked around his neck to pull him down slightly. His smile would only grow bigger.

Within a few moments, the two of them were forced to pull away from each other. He drew her closer to him. He had lifted her off the floor as if she didn’t weight anything at all. His strong forearms were tightly wrapped around her small waist, holding her against him. He began nuzzling her neck with delicate kisses. He whispered sweet nothings into her ear.

“That’s...that’s wonderful,” Tom smiled. He was very hesitant to lower her back onto the ground, because he wanted nothing more than to just hold her in his arms forever. He looked down at her like she just had handed him the whole world. “It’s absolutely wonderful. You’re wonderful,” Tom breathed.

“We should schedule an appointment with the doctor,” Y/N suggested. She grabbed onto his hand in her own, lacing their fingers together. She pressed one quick kiss to his lips. She smiled brightly up at him. “We can confirm it there,” Y/N concluded.

It had been nearly an entire week before the young couples scheduled appointment at the doctor’s office. They were currently waiting in the small examination room. They were just waiting for the doctor to come back with the test results.

Currently, Tom was pacing the short stretch of the room. He had the very tip of his thumb in his mouth, biting down on his nails out of habit. He just had this uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“You’re making me nervous,” Y/N confessed. She had a strong look of concern and worry on her face. She had dropped her gaze to stare down at her hands in her lap, fiddling with her fingers in a nervous manner. She let out a shaky breath.

“I’m sorry,” Tom sighed. He didn’t mean to make her nervous, but he was very impatient to find out the test results. He walked across the small room, settling down in the seat next to her. He took her hand in his own.

In that moment, the doctor had opened the door and walked into his office. He was sure to close the door behind him for privacy reasons. He shuffled to stand in front of the young couple, stopping in his place. He was holding onto a clipboard in his hands, which no doubt had the test results on them. He smiled at them.

“I should congratulate you! It looks like your tests came back positive,” the doctor claimed. He had just briefly flipped through the pages on his clipboard. He was able to determine that she was eight weeks into her pregnancy. “You are pregnant,” he confessed.

The couple had turned their heads to look at each other with wide smiles on their faces. The doctor wanted to do an ultrasound just to check the baby’s vitals and to make sure the baby was healthy.

The doctor started to prepare the ultrasound machine. He flipped a few switches and clicked a few buttons. The expecting future mother was currently laying examiner’s table. She lifted her shirt just high enough to expose her flat stomach. The doctor had smeared this cool gel onto her stomach, shifting to move the cursor through the weird sticky stuff.

Suddenly, a heavy thumping sound was starting to come from the machine. The tiny tympanic heartbeat was the only sign that a new life had begun within her. However, that would soon change when the screen’s monitor showed the a black and white fuzzy picture. There was a very small figure in the center of the screen. It was the baby.

At eight weeks, the baby was about the size of a small berry. He pointed out that the head was here and the body was there. He claimed that baby’s vitals were perfectly normal. He also said that the baby was perfectly healthy and growing naturally. He took a few pictures of the screen to print out for them.

“Would you look at that? That’s our baby,” Tom said with the biggest smile on his face. He was just staring down at the little picture in his hands, claiming that he was going to put it in his wallet so he could keep it close to him. He pecked his wife’s lips in a loving manner. “I love you,” Tom whispered.

When it came time to tell their friends and family about the news of their pregnancy, the young couple decided that they only wanted to tell a few select people for privacy reasons. They wanted to keep the pregnancy out of the public press.

They were going to tell the family during their weekly family dinner with both sides of the family. The Holland family was hosting this week’s dinner. They had also invited Harrison over for dinner.

The two of them found themselves heading towards the front door of his childhood home. They had stopped to stand in front of the door. They had rung the doorbell on the side of the door, waiting patiently by themselves. They could hear the faint footsteps coming closer. They had watched the door swing wide open to revel both of their parents on the other side.

“There they are,” Nikki exclaimed. She was quick to pull both of them into the house. She had closed the door behind them. She had basically flung her arms around her son’s taller frame, pulling him down to her height. She kissed his check affectionately.

“My dear,” Sarah (her mom) smiled. She wrapped her arms around her dear daughter, squeezing her tightly. She almost didn’t want to let her go, but she did eventually. She was already rambling on about how her daughter never came to visit her anymore.

Her dad had come to stand beside her. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, bringing her smaller figure into his side in a loving manner. He pressed a small kiss on the top of her head. He pulled away from her. He had turned his head to look towards his son-in-law, taking one single step forward to address him.

“How are you, son?” He wondered. He didn’t seem to smile at him. He was standing directly in front of him. He was probably trying to seem intimidating to him. He gave him a firm hand shake.

“I’m good, sir,” Tom answered politely. He had released his father-in-law’s hand, lowering it back down to his side. He nodded his head in acknowledgment. “It’s very nice to see you again, Mr and Mrs Y/L/N,” Tom stated with a small smile on his face.

In the background, the three brothers were trying to hush the dog who just kept barking. The boys would head towards the group to greet their own brother and only sister-in-law. They headed into the living room to keep talking with each other.

During dinner, the whole family was sitting around the table. The two fathers were sitting on either end of the table. On the the far side of the table, Nikki and Sarah were sitting beside each other along with Harry and Harrison. On the opposite side of the table, the young couple was sitting with Sam and Paddy.

The soft sound of silverware clinking and clanging against the plates could be heard very distinctly. The small talk was very brief. The boys were mostly talking about Harry’s new film that they were shooting in the backyard. The young couple had been silently for most of the meal because they didn’t know how to bring up the baby.

Slowly, Tom had turned his head to look at his wife sitting beside him. He could tell that she wasn't really engaged in the conversation, because her mind was somewhere else. His hand found its way to her thigh. He squeezed her thigh in a reassuring manner, subconsciously bringing her back from her thoughts.

“You have been very quiet this evening,” John (her dad) spoke up. He had turned his head to glance between the two of them, catching the unspoken communication happening during dinner. He raised his eyebrows at them. “What’s on your mind?” He wondered.

“We have something that we would like to share with you,” Y/N said. She grabbed onto her husband’s hand under the table, glancing at him through the corner of her eye. She released a shaky breath. “We...we are going to have a baby,” Y/N confessed.

There was a moment of silence that had honestly felt like an absolute eternity. The whole family was simply trying unpack the load that had just been handed to them. The young couple were studying each of the family members, searching for some kind of reaction from them.

“Y-You’re pregnant?” Her mother was the very first person to speak. She spoke in a tone of disbelief. Her eldest daughter had only nodded her head in response. She smiled at her.

“I knew it,” Sam said with a triumphant smile on his face. He had turned his head to look across the small stretch of the table, pointing a finger towards his twin brother. “You owe me money,” Sam stated.

“Oh my god!" Her mother screamed. Her mother had screamed so loudly that it had practically startled every other person sitting at the table. She stood up from the table. She did not hesitate to run towards her, throwing her arms around her in a tight hug. She was still sitting in her chair so her head was resting against her mother’s own stomach. Her body visibly relaxed at her reaction, melting into her mother’s embrace.

“You’re pregnant with our first grandbaby,” Nikki exclaimed. She had lifted her hand to cover her mouth in slight disbelief. Her smile was starting to grow at the corners of her lips. She had a few tears in her eyes too.

Meanwhile, her father had also stood to his feet. He had turned his head to look directly at his son-in-law, taking a few steps towards him. In response, Tom had stood up very quickly out of respect. He wondered if his father-in-law was going to punch him for impregnating his daughter. He was instead pulled into a hug.

For a brief moment, Tom was so shocked that he kept his arms at his sides. He had always known that his father-in-law was never a really emotional or sentimental man. When his father-in-law had pulled away from him, he could see the fresh tears in his eyes.

“You are a good man, Tom. You must be sure to take good care of them now,” her father explained. He had forced himself to clear his throat. He had tried to lower his voice to hide the fact that he was crying tears of joy.

“Yes sir. I will,” Tom said. He had turned his head head to look down at his wife beside him, feeling a strong sense of protectiveness overtake him. He placed a hand on her shoulder. And he smiled down at her.

For the rest of the night, the whole family was only talking about the new baby. The two mothers were now fawning and fretting over the expecting mother in their midst. The two fathers wanted to share some advice with the young couple. The four boys were bickering about who was going to be the best uncle out of all of them. The boys had also started to place bets down on the gender of the baby. And the young couple were able to tell that the whole family was just as excited for the baby as they were.

At thirteen weeks, the baby bump was finally starting to show little by little. She found it very difficult to get into her jeans. She jumped up and down in hopes of getting her pants higher onto her waist. She just wasn’t able to secure the bottom. She would eventually just get frustrated enough that she would switch out her jeans for leggings.

She was (at first) very self-conscious about her baby bump. She would even wonder if the baby bump wasn’t a baby at all. She had been having these insanely weird food cravings recently. She combined some of the weirdest foods together like pickles and ice cream or bacon and peanut butter.

One night, Tom had turned to wrap his arm around his wife’s waist in their shared bed. He was greatly disappointed to find that his wife was not even in their bed. He quickly climbed out of bed to go find her.

She was currently sitting on the large plush couch in the living room. She had a heavy blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She had a small tub of ice cream resting on the top of her baby bump. She dug her spoon into the tub of ice cream. Then she stuffed the silver spoon into her mouth, sobbing uncontrollably to herself.

She said that she didn’t feel beautiful with the baby bump because she was convinced that it wasn’t a baby bump at all. She believed that her baby bump was actually just her gaining weight from the weird food combos. Her husband had to convince her that she was absolutely beautiful to him. He also said that it was just the baby growing inside her.

Thankfully, her doctor was also able to reassure her that it was a baby bump. She was right at the end of her first trimester, so it was completely normal and natural that her baby bump would start showing now. She felt so relieved to hear that.

For a while, she felt bad that her dear husband had to put up with her weird food cravings and her unpredictable mood swings. She had known that it was apart of the process, but that didn’t stop her from feeling bad about it. She would always apologize to him afterwards. And she was rewarded with a soft and sweet kiss from him.

Every night, Tom liked to lay down on the top of her legs with his head right in front of the baby bump. He would always start by lifting her shirt up to expose her growing stomach. He rubbed his hands on the sides of her stomach in a soothing and reassuring manner. He would pepper kisses on her bare skin, which tickled her sometimes. He also liked to talk to the baby even if the baby couldn’t hear him yet.

During the seventeenth week of pregnancy, Y/N was able to feel the baby move for the first time. It had practically taken her breath away at first. She pressed her hand down to the side of her stomach, practically searching for the place the baby had moved.

With each day, the baby was starting to become more active in her stomach. The baby’s turns and kicks were getting more frequent and more obvious. She was slowly getting used to the fluttery feeling happening inside of her.

During one of Tom’s night sessions with the baby bump, the baby had actually responded to him with a sharp and strong kick in her side. It had caused her to grunt and press her hand to the side of her stomach. She had closed her eyes and breathed out slowly.

“Are you okay? Is something wrong?” Tom asked. He was looking at her with a strong sense of worry and concern in the depths of his eyes. He was quick to grab onto her hand to comfort her. He kissed the back of her hand.

Without hesitation, Y/N had shifted his hand down the side of her stomach. She had pressed his warm palm against the specific spot where she felt the baby kick. She had hoped the baby would kick again.

“Come on, baby. Your daddy wants to feel you kicking,” she said in the sweetest and softest tone of voice. Her heart had almost jumped out of her chest upon feeling another prominent kick coming from the exact same spot on her stomach. She laughed at the feeling.

“Oh my. You can really feel him kicking in there,” Tom said with a big smile on his face. He didn’t even catch the specific pronoun that had come out of his mouth. He had probably just said it subconsciously. He pressed a sweet kiss to the spot. He grew to love his baby more with each passing day.

The baby shower was going to be held at the young couple’s house. The whole family was taking care of the various things that needed to get done before the guests arrived. The three brothers were suppose to be inflating pink and blue balloons, but it just turned into them ‘accidentally’ letting them loose on each other. The mothers were working diligently in the kitchen, preparing various snacks for the guests. It felt like things were really starting to come together.

However, when the soon-to-be mother had finally come down the stairs, she had wanted to help with some of the last minute details. She had tried to bend down to grab one of the streamers, but the whole family had just yelled at her. They said that she needed to sit down and relax because everything was already going to be taken care of and she didn’t need to worry about anything. She just sighed to herself, sitting down on the couch next to the dog.

Once the guests had begun to arrive at the house, the baby shower was able to start. The couple had decided that they weren’t going to find out the baby’s gender until he/she was born. There was a small bowl in the center of the coffee table where the guests could write down their guess on the baby’s gender and place it in the bowl. The three brothers were able to collect the papers, counting out how many people had voted for a girl and how many people had voted for a boy.

It was no surprise that her own mother and mother-in-law had said that they wanted their grandbaby to be a girl. Now Nikki only had four boys of her own. She wanted a granddaughter that she could spoil rotten with gifts and gowns. However, the Holland boys were absolutely convinced that the baby was going to be a boy for “obvious reasons.” The young couple really didn’t care about the gender right now. They just hoped that the baby would be healthy when it came into the world.

The guests’ gifts had consisted of an endless supply of diapers and bottles. They also received various baby creams, lotions, and powders. There was only one present left to open.

“Who is this one from?” Y/N wondered. She had been given the last present by her personal helper (Paddy). She didn’t even notice the small blush on his cheeks. She had grabbed onto the small tag on the side, reading the name of her little brother-in-law. “Is this from you, Paddy?” She asked.

“Yeah,” Paddy nodded shyly. He was fiddling with his fingers in a nervous manner, feeling slightly uncomfortable with all the adults looking directly at him. He pointed to the small bag. “It used to be mine but I am getting too old now. I wanted to give it to your baby,” Paddy claimed

“Oh Paddy,” Y/N said with a small swoon. She found a small brown teddy bear in the bag. The brown bear’s fur did look slightly worn and old. The teddy bear smelled like lavender, which meant that it had been thrown into the wash just recently. Now the teddy bear had soft brown fur, a button nose, and silky paws. It was just perfect.

“The baby will love it,” Tom said with a bright smile. He had turned his head to look over at his youngest brother, tilting his head to nod at him. He wanted to give his brother at hug at the sweet gesture, but he knew that it would only embarrass him further.

It was starting to become much later in the day. The guests had started to take their leave until there were no guests in the house at all. The whole family pitched in the clean up the mess that was left. The boys were currently picking up the wrapping paper from the presents in the living room. The girls were working to clean and wash the dishes in the kitchen.

The Holland boys been ordered by their dearest mother to carry the various gifts out to the car. This would quickly turn into a competition to see who could carry the most gifts. Of course, Paddy was trying to balance an entire tower of presents in his hands and Sam tried to stack some on his head. It only resulted in some of the presents being dropped onto the ground. They were thankful that their mother didn’t see that.

At the end of the day, Tom and Y/N would drive back to their own house which was only a few blocks away from them. She wanted to help him carry the gifts into the house, but he insisted that he could carry them by himself. She would direct him to bring the various presents into the only spare bedroom in their small house, which they intended to convert into a nursery. They would have to start working on that sooner or later.

The whole week had been dedicated to cleaning out the second bedroom in their small house. They were going to start to convert it into a nursery this next week. The young couple had decided to paint the walls with a mild grey tone, because it was a pretty neutral color. It was also very clean and bland.

Now Tom and Haz had taken a few days to paint the whole nursery. At first, they didn’t buy enough paint for the whole room. They had to go back to the store to buy more. The only problem was that they bought the wrong shade of grey in the nursery. They had only realized this until they had painted half the wall. The two boys would have to go back to the store again.

At the moment, Y/N was twenty-three weeks into her pregnancy. She had found herself spending most of her time off her feet because they were starting to swell. Her neck was constantly stiff and her back was killing her. She wasn’t able to really relax with the whole baby thing.

Today, Y/N and Tom were planning on going out to the shops to pick out various pieces of furniture for the nursery. He had wanted his brothers (including Haz) to tag along with them so that they could help him lift the heavier furniture. She had already ordered some decorations to put in the nursery, but now they needed some other essential items.

"Why don't Sam and Harry look for some gender neutral onesies, sleep suits, and rompers? I’ll have Tom and Haz start looking for a carseat and a good stroller. And Paddy and I will look for a crib/craddle and a changing table,” Y/N said with a small smile on her face.

At once, Sam and Harry had hurried to find a cart for themselves. They were immediately headed towards the clothing aisle near the back of the store. In the meantime, Y/N had found herself reaching down to grab onto Paddy’s hand. She started leading him in the right direction, shifting towards the large furniture section of the store. Finally, Tom and Haz had started off on their own journey to find the things.

Currently, Sam and Harry were standing in front of the clothing racks that were specifically for baby boys. They really didn’t know where to start, so they just started grabbing each of the outfits on the racks. The two twins would simply toss each piece of clothing into the cart.

“What size will he come out as?” Sam wondered. He was quick to find the small tag on the back collar of the clothes that indicated the size of the infant. He had turned his head to look at his brother standing beside him, tilting his head for some kind of explanation.

“He’ll be a big boy. That’s for sure,” Harry smiled. The two twins had basically cleaned out the small store, buying every single baby boy outfit in biggest size possible. They had a strong feeling that the baby was going to be a boy. They really didn’t have any regrets.

Meanwhile, Tom and Haz were reading the directions on the back of the box for a special stroller. The two of them were able to find different brands of strollers, carriers, and carseats. They had already added a certain carrier and carseat to their cart.

“It’s like building a rocket,” Tom exclaimed. He had just briefly read some of the directions on the back of the box, finding that he didn’t know most of the names of the parts. He didn’t think it would be an easy task. “I wouldn’t even know where to start,” Tom confessed

“I can help you assemble it,” Haz said. He had shrugged his his shoulders at the notion, stating that it couldn’t be that hard to put it together. He sent him a small smile.

With a simple nod the the head, Tom and Haz had managed to hoist the heavy box into the cart. They were already able to get everything on their list. The two of them started to head down the long length of the aisle, shifting to round the sharp corner. The next aisle was full of books!

Hesitantly, Tom had found himself turning into the book aisle. He was taking a quick glance at the titles of the books. He had grabbed one book that was called “What To Expect When You Are Expecting.” He silently wondered if he should take some of these books home with him. He placed the book in the cart.

In the other aisle, Y/N and Paddy were carefully studying the different displays of baby furniture. The two of them would take their time and stop to look at one. They were able to point out their favorite features of the furniture piece, but they were also able to find some flaws (wrong color or weird design).

There was a large white crib with thick bars and a shelf that had drawers built into the side. There was also a white changing table which was an added addition to the set. The furniture was quite expensive.

“Do you like that one?” Tom asked.

In response, Y/N had practically jumped at his words. She had shifted to face him, scolding him for scaring her so badly. She was able to look back towards the matching furniture, mentally imagining what the two pieces would look like in the nursery at home.

“I love it,” Y/N confessed. She ran her hand across the smooth wood. She didn’t want to look at the price tag again, but she had to face reality. She sighed to herself, shaking her head at the thought of spending so much money. “But the price is too—”

“Don't worry about the price,” Tom cut her off. He had taken one single step forward in his place, shifting his hand to the side of her waist. He pressed one soft kiss against her temple. He smiled at her. “I’ll buy it for you. I’ll buy you anything you want,” Tom said.

Within a few moments, Tom and Haz were trying to maneuver one of the boxes into the cart. The two of them were shouting directions at each other, telling one to go right or the other to go left. They were finally able to get one of the boxes into the cart, but they still had one more box to lift and carry into the cart.

In that moment, Sam and Harry had been able to rejoin the group. The two of them were told to grab one of the corners so that they could turn the box onto the side. This was defiantly the heavier piece of furniture out of the two. In the end, the four of them were just able to get the fine furniture into the shopping cart.

In the background, Y/N had found herself wandering down the long length of the aisle. She had stopped to stand in front of a white rocking chair with a teddy bear on the seat. She could see that the chair also came with an ottoman. She had looked over the small stretch of her shoulder, silently pleading for permission from her dear husband. She didn’t need much to persuade him.

It was trial and effort. The four boys had been trying to carry the two big boxes up the stairs and into the nursery. The four of them kept having to readjust their grip or change the general direction. The boys had been shouting commands at each other for the past hour. They were able to get the big boxes into the nursery at last.

The Holland boys had just finished unboxing the heavy furniture. They had thrown the bubble wrap and packing peanuts in the trash. The boys were now left to assemble the whole thing.

At one point, Sam and Harry had been trying to translate the directions for the crib which they were convinced had been written in another language. That language had turned out to be French, so they flipped the piece of paper over to read it in English.

Meanwhile, Tom and Haz had been looking at the various labels on each piece. They had tried to organize the parts in an orderly manner, but they quickly found that random parts and pieces would be put together. They just couldn’t make any sense of it.

“We need to attack Point B to Point E on part six and then turn counter clockwise until Point A is parallel to Point U on part ten,” Harry read aloud. He had lifted his head to peer over the edge of the paper, looking at the various parts in front of him.

“Cause that makes perfect sense,” Tom sighed. His voice was laced with complete frustration and confusion. He ran his hand through his hair. He frowned down at the pile of parts in front of him.

“Maybe you should take a break,” Y/N suggested. She was currently standing in the doorframe of the nursery, staring into the small nursery from the hallway. She had subconsciously placed her hand on her stomach.

“No. I can do this. I’m the father,” Tom explained. He had waved his hand in dismissal. He had turned his head to look towards the piece of paper, taking two of the parts listed in his hands. He was able to connect them together.

Slowly, the white crib and changing table were starting to take on a familiar form. The directions had actually made some sense. The tools and power tools were being used to secure every single nail/screw into place. The furniture had been assembled by a team of ‘professionals.’

Nearly three hours later, Y/N had walked into the small nursery with a tray of glass of lemonade. She had basically gasped at the beautiful sight in front of her. Her baby’s nursery was perfectly put together.

The white crib was pressed against the farthest and darkest wall of the small nursery. The white changing table was laying underneath the window. The matching rocking chair was lingering in the corner of the room with the ottoman at its feet. The closet was full of baby (boy) clothes. There were a few miscellaneous stuffed animals scattered across the floor. It looked absolutely perfect to the expecting mother.

Instantly, Y/N had placed the tray of drinks onto the top of the table. She walked straight towards her dear husband who was still kneeling on the ground, securing the last screw into place. She had placed her hand on her stomach in an affectionate manner.

“It’s perfect, Tom. He will love it,” Y/N said with the biggest and brightest smile on her face. She had lifted her hand to touch the white wooden railing of the baby crib, running her hand across the smooth wood. She just couldn’t wait to see her baby in that very crib in a few short weeks.

“How do you know it’s a boy?” Tom wondered. He had turned his head to look at his wife standing over him, quirking his eyebrow at her choice of pronoun. He was most amused by her words. He smirked at her.

“I just do,” she boasted. She had shrugged her shoulders at her sides. She had forced herself to keep a frown on her face, but it was hard for her to keep her poker face. She could feel the small smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

“What if I want a girl?” Tom challenged. He was now playing along with her little game. He had subconsciously shifted his hands to the sides of her stomach, rubbing her large stomach in a soothing manner. He hummed under his breath.

“No. You’re not getting one,” she claimed. She couldn’t keep her smile hidden anymore. She had placed her hands on the stretch of his shoulders. She was quick to lean down to his level, pressing one soft kiss on his life.

“Is that so?” Tom smiled. He had shifted his hands through her long locks of hair, shuffling his hand to the back of her neck to keep her close to him. He could feel her move to perch on his knee. He slanted his head to the side to deepen the kiss.

“Yuck!” Paddy called. “They’re kissing.”

For the past few weeks leading up the the baby’s birth, Tom had spent most of his time worrying about his heavily pregnant wife. He was constantly standing right beside her because he refused to even leave her side. He just wanted to be close by when she needed him.

He would bring her anything that she asked for, whether that be pillows or pickles. He would massage her sore and swollen feet at the end of the day. He would press kisses against her baby bump to show his love and affection.

He had found himself checking the duffle bag that they would bring to the hospital with them (when it was time for the baby to come). He just wanted to make sure that they had everything they needed. He even made a list of things to bring to the hospital.

During one night session with the baby, Tom had started by lifting her shirt up to expose her heavily pregnant stomach. He rubbed his hands on the sides of her stomach in a soothing and reassuring manner. He pressed one soft kiss on the underside of her stomach.

“I really wish you had come for my birthday,” Tom confessed. He had turned his head to press his ear against the top of her stomach, shutting his eyes to savor the sweet moment. He was listening to the baby’s solid heartbeat. “You would have been the best gift to receive,” Tom explained.

“He will come out soon,” Y/N promised. She didn’t want to admit that she had been having some contractions for the past few days, because she knew that it would only worry her husband. She knew that he would drive her straight to the hospital if she even mentioned it. She was just trying to hold off for a little longer.

However, Y/N was unable to hold it off any longer by the next night. She had been tossing and turning during the entire night because she wasn’t able to get in a comfortable position. She could tell that her contractions were becoming a lot stronger and a lot closer together.

In the early hours of the night, she had hoisted herself into a sitting position in their shared bed. She could feel a strong contraction hitting her like a ton of bricks, causing her to scrunch her eyes and hold her breath in pain. She had dropped her hand onto the side of her stomach, grunting to herself at the painful sensation coursing through her body. She was quick to wake her sleeping husband.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Tom wondered. He sat up in bed. He had turned his body to face her’s in a split second, tilting his head to the side in curiosity. He could see the visible pain etched onto her face. He took her hand in his own to reassure her.

“I am having contractions,” Y/N grunted to herself. She felt like she was clawing at her own stomach, feeling the pain ripping through her entire body. She could feel this small amount of relief washing over her, feeling the effects of the sharp and strong contraction start to die down. “I-I think that the baby might be coming,” Y/N said with a small whine.

For a brief second, Tom had been in a full panic mode. He had practically jumped out of their shared bed. He was quick to put some real clothes on. He had started to grab various things around the small stretch of the room, stuffing the car keys into his pocket and grabbing his wife’s loose shoes to wear to the hospital. He had hurried back to her side.

During the next contraction, Tom was sure to set a small timer on his phone. He was careful to watch the timer on his phone, pressing the stop button once she said that the contraction was over. His phone had read fifteen minutes apart.

Nonetheless, Tom wanted to take his wife directly to the hospital despite her protests of being too early. He helped her out of bed. He had grabbed onto of her favorite sweaters, throwing it over her shoulders. He had started to lead her down the stairs, heading straight towards the front door of the house. He did not forget to grab the duffle bag on the way.

Slowly, she had climbed into the passenger seat of the car. Her dear husband was careful to stretch the buckle across the big baby bump. She had placed her hand on the side of her stomach. She could see the carseat in the back of the car, which only brought a smile to her face. She was going to have a baby.

On the way to the hospital, Tom had quickly called their parents to let them know that they were headed to the hospital. He had turned his head to look at his dear wife sitting beside him, trying to see if she was uncomfortable in any way, shape, or form. He was quick to grab her hand in his own. He carried her hand towards his face, pressing a soft kiss to her hand.

At the hospital, the young couple were able to be checked into an empty room. Even though her contractions were pretty far apart, she was already an entire week late. The doctors wanted to put her in a room (as soon as possible) so that they could check to see how the baby was doing at the moment. They had also figured that—as soon as she went into labor—the baby would come out in no time. They had to get her in the room.

In the private room, Y/N had taken the time to change into the hospital gown. She had been hooked up to various wires and tubes that would monitor her/her baby’s heart rate and her contractions. She was also given some medication to ease the pain for the moment.

Now the doctor had come to check the monitors and to check her cervix dilation. She hadn’t even started dilating just yet. It was way too early to do anything at this point. She would just have to ride out her contractions and wait for her cervix to start to dilate.

During the first hours, Y/N was laying down in the hospital bed. She was hoping to get some sleep before she would have to deliver the baby, especially since she didn’t get much sleep. She had plenty of pillows and blankets to keep her comfortable. She had fallen asleep within a few minutes. She was able to sleep for an hour.

In the background, Tom had been making a few personal phone calls to friends and family. He had turned his head to find her sleeping figure on the hospital bed. He stood to his feet, shuffling towards her. He had lowered himself onto the side of the bed, lifting his hand to brush some hair out of her face. He leaned down to kiss her head lovingly.

Within a few moments, Y/N had woken from her hour long sleep. She had hoisted her body into a sitting position, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. She gripped onto the white sheets underneath her, feeling this strong contraction coursing through her. She closed her eyes tight.

Once the pain had gone away, Y/N had very slowly stood to her feet. She had started to walk around the small stretch of the room, remembering some book or article that had said walking induces labor. She had one hand on the side of her stomach and one hand on the curve of her back. She sighed to herself.

Without warning, she could feel the fresh tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. She had placed the back of her hand against her mouth to hide the fact that she was getting emotional. Her salty tears were wetting her cheeks by streaming down her face. She sniffled her nose.

Out of instinct, Tom had been quick to rush to her side. He wrapped his arms around her smaller frame, drawing her into his grasp. He tried to tilt his head down to look at her face, but she simply buried her face in his chest to hide from him. He asked her what was wrong.

“I just want it to be over,” she cried. She turned her head to nuzzle into his neck, trying to be closer to him. She could feel the muscles of her chin tremble like a small child. She sobbed into his chest unceasingly, hands clutching at his sweatshirt.

“It will be over soon,” Tom promised. He was holding her in complete silence, slowly rocking her as her tears soaked his chest. He weaved his fingers through her long locks of hair, hushing her with his soft voice. He kissed the top of her head.

When the doctor had come back to the room (nearly three hours later), she was very pleased to find that she had made some progression. She had dilated nearly four centimeters. She said that she would come back to check up on her in a few hours. She left the room once again.

Now Tom was leaning back against the hospital bed with his heavily pregnant wife laying in his arms. He could feel her back pressing against his chest, practically leaning into his soft touch. He had shifted his hands towards the sides of her stomach, rubbing her stomach in a soothing manner.

“You can do this, darling. Just breath,” Tom whispered upon feeling her body tense in his grasp. Her contractions were starting to get longer, stronger, and closer together. She was accumulating a thin layer of sweat on her forehead from the pain that she was going through. She released a strangled moan.

At one point, Tom had slipped out of the bed. He was currently sitting on the chair beside her bed. He had gone to get some ice chips for her. He was now feeding them to her upon request. He smiled at her silly behavior.

A few hours later, the doctor had come back into the room. She was sure to check the vitals on the monitor for her and her baby, coming to the conclusion that everything was completely normal. She had also found that she had dilated to seven centimeters, which meant that she would be able to start pushing soon. She had left the room to prepare for the birth.

The three nurses entered the private room in blue scrubs. The nurses had brought some various pieces of equipment that would help with the birth. The nurses had started to organize some things for when the time came for the baby to be born.

They had placed these two leg-holders on either side of the bed. The nurse had begun to explain the whole process. She said that they were going to count to ten during the contraction. This was the prime time for her to push. Once they got to ten seconds, she would be able to stop pushing for a short break between contractions. The baby would come out much quicker this way.

She had dilated ten centimeters! She had been in labor for nearly twelve hours before it was finally time to push the baby out. Her legs were placed in the two holders on the side of her bed, putting her in the perfection position. Her husband had been given a cover to wear over his clothes so he wouldn’t contaminate anything. He was now standing right beside her, holding her hand the entire time.

“Alright. You are going to start pushing now,” the doctor had encouraged her. She lifted her head to look at her patient, nodding her head in approval. She started to count to ten for her.

In that moment, Y/N had forced herself to push as hard as she could with the little energy she had left. She could feel the intense pain streaming through every single cell in her body. She came to the end of ten seconds. She dropped back down into the bed, dreading this whole process.

It had been nearly two hours since she had started pushing during her contractions. With each contraction came a pain that dominated her entire being. In those moments, for those seconds that stretched into infinity, there was nothing else. She didn’t care if other patients could hear her screaming from other rooms.

When the pain passed, it was only for a minute or so. She was trying to catch her breath with closed eyes. She was unwilling to re-engage with life outside of her own body. She couldn’t even focus on her husband standing beside her, encouraging her with forehead kisses and sweet words.

The doctor was telling her that is was time to push again. With a guttural grun,t she did so and was told to stop. It was just enough. She had felt the baby crowning, but she held her breath. Without any further effort, the newborn baby had slipped into the doctor’s hands. The doctor was quick to wrap the baby in a soft blanket.

The newborn baby had taken a deep breath only to release this loud cry of protest. The baby had been covered in this mixture of a white waxy substance and some small specs of blood. The newborn was quickly cleaned with the soft blanket by the doctor.

“It’s a boy,” the doctor exclaimed.

The new mother could feel her eyes turn glossy with tears. Through her exhaustion, she can manage a small smile. She did not hesitate to look at the baby that was being brought to lay on her bare skin of her chest. She begins to cry the sweetest tears she has ever known, She felt the painful moments leading up to this slowly melting away.

At the sight of the baby, Tom had burst into tears of joy and happiness. He didn’t even seem to care that his hand had been practically crushed in hers during the last two hours. He only cared about his beautiful wife and his newborn son at the given moment.

In that moment, Tom was able to cut the umbilical cord with a pair of scissors. He had turned his head to look back towards his loving wife and son. He could feel his heart swelling one hundred times in his chest, growing more at the mere sight of his loved ones. Leaning down, Tom was able to get a better look at the baby. He was quick to cradle the back of the baby boy’s head, pressing a soft kiss to his head. He couldn’t stop smiling.

The baby was so light. His head was burrowing into his mother’s chest, feeling the warmth of her body so comforting. His tiny toes were peeking out from the blanket. His head was a mass of brown waves that would match his father’s looks. The baby had opened his mouth to cry, but he could only manage a quiet snuffling sound. His throat must have been dry and sore.

“He’s so beautiful,” Y/N smiled. She had shifted to newborn baby closer against her chest, bringing him in closer to her face. She had brushed the back of her face against the baby’s chubby cheek. She kissed his soft head.

“He’s absolutely perfect,” Tom agreed. He had turned his head to look at his dear wife laying beside him. He pushed her sticky and sweaty hair away from her forehead, kissing her in such a loving manner. “I love you so much. I am so proud of you,” Tom confessed with a bright smile on his face.

With great hesitation, the new mother had handed her baby boy to the nurses so that they could clean him and check on him. The nurses had only brought the newborn baby to the small table on the other side of the room because they had all of the necessary equipment with them.

During the whole checkup, Tom was carefully watching the three nurses from the sidelines. He was still standing next to his wife’s beside, but he was watching them from the short distance. He could see that they were just weighing and measuring him at the moment.

“Go see him,” she encouraged him. She could tell that he wanted to be there. He wanted to stand beside the three nurses, watching his baby boy in a protective manner. He wanted to spend every single second with that newborn. He just wanted to hold his baby boy and he never wanted to let go.

Hesitantly, Tom had shuffled across the small stretch of the room. He stood beside the nurses. He had lowered his gaze to stare down at the little naked baby on the surface of the table. The soft pink baby was crying so loud and hard. His bottom lip was trembling in its place. His hands were balled into tight fists. And his eyes were still squeezes shut.

“It’s okay, baby. I’m here,” Tom said.

Upon hearing these words, the baby boy had stopped crying in a split second. He had popped his eyes open. He had turned his head to look directly towards the sound of his own father’s voice, recognizing the tone. His cheeks were stained with these fresh salty tears. His warm brown eyes were just gazing up into his fathers’.

The nurses were quick to swaddle the silent baby, wrapping him in this light blue blanket. They placed this blue hat on his little head to cover his dark locks of hair. The one nurse was very careful to lift the newborn baby into her arms. The nurse had turned her body towards the new father standing beside her, handing the baby boy to him.

“Do you want to hold him?” the nurses wondered. In response, Tom was gently handed his own son. He was holding him very cautiously and carefully, fearing that he might break him because he was just so little. He never tore his eyes away from the baby boy in his arms. He walked back to the beside.

The newborn baby had come into the world after fourteen hard hours of labor. He was five pounds and four ounces. He was also one full week late. He was born at 8:14am on June 3rd.

The new parents were both currently laying on the hospital bed in the private room. The two of them were staring down at the baby in complete admiration. They had turned their heads to look at each other, leaning forward to share a kiss. They could feel their love for each other growing stronger with each passing minute. They never wanted this happy moment to end.

“Welcome to the world, Thomas Stanley Holland Jr.”

#tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland angst #baby holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland oneshot #tom holland imagine #tom holland series

565 notes · View notes

brideofcthulhu10 · 4 years

Text

Here we are, I apologize for the delay you guys but I can guarantee you it is so worth the wait! A humongous shout out to my incredible co-author @imlostinsantacarla for writing this with me, I had an amazing time and this is arguably one of the best written posts I’ve done so far. SO without further ado, I give you

Lost Boys Fem!S/O Gives Birth [3/4]

CONTENT WARNING: Offensive Language, Blood, Child Birthing Process, Intense Environment! READER'S DISCRETION IS ADVISED!

Marko

The soft silver moonlight slithered through the cracks and crevices overhead in the hotel, illuminating your form in a tender glow. You laid casually atop the dusty old couch worn from years of perpetual abuse, staring up into the cave’s ceiling at the little slivers of sky you could see between them, fingers fondling the soft blanket wrapped around you. Nerves caused your heart to stutter as another set of cramps waded through your body, making you feel nauseated. However, you put on a valiant front, hardly batting an eyelash as your boyfriend Marko sat beside you, eyes fixated on your form in an adoring fashion, though there was worry mixed within his countenance, a deep groove carved between his brows. Granted when you had initially announced your pregnancy you could have gone about it differently, however you were met with a joyous response from your adoring vampire. Originally David had suggested they turn you whilst pregnant to prevent any foreseeable complications, but there arose a new set of issues. Your infant would be a hybrid of vampire and human, something none of you even knew was possible. The potential need for a live body could mean that turning yourself before the birth could kill him or her in the process. Even if the birth could result in your death, unfortunately, all you could do was patiently wait, as going to a hospital was surely out of the question. Nevertheless, patience was a virtue- one Marko had yet to achieve.

The months of waiting grew heavier on him as time ticked by, whilst the haunting lack of knowledge grew more frustrating with any passing discomfort he witnessed. His inability to help you outside of a shoulder to cry on when your cramps became too unbearable to sleep through made him feel helpless, a sensation that not only was he unfamiliar with; it was one he absolutely loathed. The boys did their utmost best to be accommodating to the situation, and one certainly had to give them credit for the amount of effort they had gone through. Dwayne had gone to the library for a few books for yourself and Marko, including one or two children’s books for the baby. Paul had spent his free nights shoplifting for supplies you’d need. No one could dismantle and sneak out an entire crib like Paul could. The guy had created a craft in the endeavor. David, with the help of Dwayne, had scoped through the caves and old hotel rooms still salvageable and managed to reinforce one of the rooms closest to their own cave. You eagerly draped the walls in colorful fabrics, finding an old dresser for your child’s clothes with a surface now cluttered with stuffed animals. Toys were crammed into a wooden chest, a massive rug laid across the old wooden flooring to deter any stray splinters from harming you. Watching Paul and Marko stubbornly argue over the crib instructions was certainly the highlight of your pregnancy while David was barking at them to move out of the way when he came carrying in the glider chair in one arm and a mass of pillows in the other. Although, you had to draw the line once Marko had smacked Paul with a two by four. Surely, that was uncalled for. But according to Marko, not so! Best friend or not, no one said he had the building skills of a drunk monkey!

Tonight was the night that would mark round about the eighth month of your pregnancy, and, - if it were truly possible -, Marko nearly had a heart attack when your false contractions came into play a few weeks ago. This ignited a vigilant nature within him, motivating him to remain much closer to you than he had previously been, which resulted in a lot of checking up on every unusual sound that you made. It was impossible for it to be helped. Well, that's what he kept telling you anyway.

"You know, I can skip out on the hunt tonight…" Marko trailed off, cool fare fingertips dancing along the soft flesh of your arms, creating goosebumps to rise in their wake. The contrast between body temperatures was ghastly and you shivered, more at the electric shock that raced through you whenever he touched you.

"Babe, you skipped out on the hunt last night, and the night before, and even the night before that. Marko, you must be starving!" You sighed irately, tipping your head back in frustration before turning it in his direction. Ever since the news of your pregnancy, Marko's primal instincts to protect you and your child had grown in vast numbers. It was pleasant to begin with, almost endearing… Though, as months sped by it had grown a hindrance because the young man was hardly even caring for himself now, and he hardly ever left your side. Honest to God, it was smothering, leaving you almost agitated at the sight of him. He was aware of this, yet still could not resist the urge within him that called for him to aid you in whatever way he could. There was an ample amount of anxiety over future happenstances such as your water breaking, uncontrollable cramps, the ACTUAL birthing of the child! You were understanding of his concern, but there was only so much that could be done. After all, you wanted your baby just as badly as he did. But he couldn’t allow his health to decline due to his own worry, you needed him. And frankly, your sense of unease was bordering onto the bandwagon of fear when you saw Marko’s ribs sticking tightly against his translucent flesh, a plethora of dark circles sinking his blue eyes into his skull. He wasn’t eating, he hardly slept, and soon he wouldn’t be able to control his frenzies.

"I don't know, baby girl," Marko began hesitantly, his round eyes widening as they peered into your own thoughtfully. Worry had never been a good look on Marko, and now, you longed for the days where reading him had been more difficult. His anxiety was like a fungi, infecting your very aura at the same time. "I don't wanna leave in case something happens you know? I mean, yeah, I guess I'm kinda thirsty but that stuff can wai-" You interrupted him with your fingertips gently silencing his lips, your eyes having shut as you breathed deeply to calm your nerves. This boy was driving you nuts.

"Marko, I know how worried you are. I am too. But babe, I can tell that it's getting harder for you to be around me because you haven't fed. I really don’t want to start smelling like a fillet mignon to you, and if you’ve been looking at me like some mouth watering steak, we run the risk of the baby becoming appealing as well, I know you don’t want to risk that." You quipped with a quirked brow, lips tucked up into a wry smile as you stared straight at him. Your case was a good one, there was no doubt about it. There could be a very good chance that Marko, albeit not on purpose, could harm you or the baby if he smelled the scent of blood or even heard a too hasty of a heartbeat. And if there were to be an accident such as that, Marko would be plagued by an immense amount of guilt for all eternity. “Besides, it’s only the seven and a half or eight month point right now. I’m not having the baby for at least six more weeks. Right now, I need you to be at your best. Please babe.”

"But-" Marko began to protest.

"She's right, Marko." David piped up lazily from across the room, his eyes never leaving the book that he had been reading. He turned the page briskly before continuing, "You need to feed. It's the basic terms of vampire-hood. If you don't, you die! Now, what good would that do anyone then?" He inquired sardonically, a trace of a smirk in the air.

"Yeah, bud! David and Y/n are right! Just go on one feed with us." Paul grinned from ear to ear at his bestest pal in the whole world, despite the horrifying fact that said best friend had hit him in the head with a two by four. Excitement had been rushing through Paul's entire being during this whole process. He was going to be an uncle man, how could he not be excited?! It had been such a bummer since Star left with Laddie, it’d be cool having some new tiny mind he could influence. Not that he'd even get as far to really influence the child without getting a brisk smack to the back of the head by David before you and Marko could even lift your fingers. No, he would not be teaching your child about the world of “Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll” at five years old!

"I mean-"

"With the way you're going, you're gonna be a shriveled prune." Dwayne muttered out of thin air as he slowly rolled past Marko and yourself on his skateboard. The hulking raven haired vampire came to a standstill as he stepped slowly off of his board. Dwayne was also right. Marko wasn't looking his brightest. Feeding was a nightly routine for a vampire in order to ensure they took in the right nutrients their dead bodies could not produce for themselves. Especially since they weren't capable of absorbing those nutrients through human food any more. Marko had to feed, there was no whisking his way around it, no matter how many excuses he could come up with.

The trio of boys stared at the curly haired blonde, your eyes also capturing his form. There was a stretch of intense silence that flooded through the hotel as Marko thought over his options, pushing a mesh of frizzed blonde hair away from his face. He didn't want to risk going out and a possible complication occurring with the baby or yourself. But he also didn't have a strong desire to cause a catastrophic accident whilst going into a frenzy when your heart rate started skyrocketing due to cramps or whatever. Already his mouth was watering profusely as he stared down at his worn hands beginning to wither from lack of nourishment, the consistent thudding of your heart and the delectable rush of your blood in your veins made it practically impossible for the man to focus for much longer.

"Man, just go! I'll stay with her." Paul finally interjected, slightly irritated that his buddy was being such a pansy about the entire situation. "If anything happens I'll scream at the top of my lungs or something, man. I got this! Scouts honor!" Paul added sarcastically, flattening a palm over his heart as he raised his free one up by his head. The entire thing looked comical, it made the others laugh.

"Yeah, sure, let me get the flowers early for the funeral," Dwayne muttered, settling himself on another dusty old couch with a soft sigh.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean, dick breath?" Paul roared, brows pulled together in anger, punching Dwayne’s shoulder..

“Can you even give scouts honor if you were never in it?” you asked with a laugh to your tone, raising a brow at the blonde trying to rapid punch the utterly indifferent vampire planted in place.

"Dwayne has a good point, Paul." David sneered at his comrade, blue eyes lit up like torches watching Dwayne yank Paul into a headlock on it’s way to a noogie. "You remember the last time we-"

"Ow! Okay, I didn't know she wasn't allowed to drink alcohol! But she never drank any so I don't get why you guys keep bringing this shit up!" Paul muttered, managing to wiggle himself out of Dwayne’s iron grip. With stubborn stomps he huffed, flopping onto the edge of the fountain in the middle of the room, his chin resting on his hands. He stared at you and Marko for a moment before continuing. "Man, I swear I won't pull another stunt like that again! I can take care of her! Dwayne told me the gist of what she can and can't have. I can do this, buddy." it was practically the most pitiful thing you had ever seen, it even tugged a little at your heartstrings.

You looked to Marko for confirmation and from the twinkle in his eyes, you could tell he was thinking the same thing as you. 'Let's just let him do this so he can stop pouting like a brat.'

"Alright, alright!" Marko stated, gloved hands raising up in the air in defeat. "You can watch out for her, but if ANYTHING happens, man, you've gotta go and find me. No fucking around and no fucking weed either!" Marko was firm as he spoke, eyes boring seriously into Paul's.

The sun broke out onto Paul's face, his pearly whites glinting from the fires scattered around the hotel. You could tell in that moment that Marko had made Paul's entire century. "Fuck yeah! Scouts honor, dude. Just like I said before!" the blonde rocker was practically bouncing in his seat like he needed a piss. He hardly looked like a badass biker vampire that went out murdering people left, right, and center every night. He looked more like a baby rabbit.

“I fucking mean it man,” Marko firmly repeated. “No weed, no booze, no being a dumbass.” Although he was being firm there was a slight twitch to his mouth. Being stern with Paul was often impossible but you had to admit, Marko was doing a grand job without the two by four!

Paul threw his hands up in the air in such a rushing motion that you were surprised they hadn't flung out of their sockets. “God damn, trust me man. I’m not gonna let anything happen! You guys need to gimme more credit here, who’s the one that stole a fucking crib for you assholes?”

With a tenacious huff, you wedged your hands behind your back feeling that the full weight of your belly was determined to keep you jammed between cushions, but nevertheless, you managed to heave yourself up and off of the dusty old couch with an audible grunt. The four boys' heads turned to watch you, instinctively with brows furrowed. They thought they'd insisted that if you needed to be moved, they would help you rather than let you strain yourself any more than you had to. But you were impossibly stubborn! You had insisted on multiple occasions that it was necessary for you to move, even exercise to keep you and the baby healthy. None of them were willing to humor you but you’d found that tuning out their protests was the best course of action in most occasions. And by impulsive habit, Marko dove over to offer you assistance, though you only responded by swatting his hands away from you. You were fine!

“I’m fine Marko, don’t worry I can get up on my own. Anyway, Paul’s right,” you agreed, looking over at your friend who beamed with delight at your praise, arms crossed over his chest with a nodding head of total satisfaction as if you had just given a mighty speech. “He’s not gonna let anything happen. Besides, what could really go wrong in just a few hours?”

"Babe, don't say shit like that, you could jinx it!" Marko cried incredulously, eyes practically bulging out of his head.

"Babe get a grip. There's no such thing as “jinxing” things." His worrying was really starting to bug you. And what did you do in turn? You did and said the exact opposite of him, a way to subconsciously counteract the apprehension that oozed out of him like a foul smell. Carefully you took his hands into yours and placed them on your taut belly. “See? Feel for yourself.”

For the past several months Marko had attested to being able to hear your unborn spawn within your stomach. Not necessarily thoughts, but emotions. Cluttered, wild, uncertain emotions that would come in jumbled waves. There was a weary contentment within you, sleeping soundly in a cradle of water kept safe within. Finally his muscles began to relax, tension beading out into limp arms as Marko pulled you in for a firm hug, holding you against him.

“You promise me.. If anything happens, you scream for me immediately. No toughing it out because you’re worried about me eating.” He mumbled sweetly into your hair, taking in a slow inhale of your heavenly scent. It was the one thing that could soothe his soul instantaneously, burying his face into the crook of your neck.

“Marko-”

“Please, Y/n.”

His plea made your heart ache with slight agony. It was a desperate rasp, his arms almost trembling. There was a rush of relief filling him when you wrapped your own arms around him with a tender smile. “Okay. Alright, I promise, if anything happens I’ll call for you,” you hummed in tender response. For a moment you had to take a moment to pause, feeling a low and deep, sharp pain stretching from your abdomen to your back. Instead of making a fuss you tried to ease your breathing before Marko could notice. You weren't prepared to allow a few false contractions to get the better of you and stop him from getting his fill of the blood he so desperately needed at this point. And you also weren't going to play into any of Marko's anxieties either. You could do that when he returned from his hunt. Gently you lifted his chin. His cold lips felt cracked against your own, cementing how desperately he needed to feed. Even his kisses grew hungry, and you had to pull away from him before this grew into a horror show. “Go, you goof.”

It had taken some further convincing for him to leave, by the time he finally left with David and Dwayne it almost felt otherworldly in that cave. The lack of presence was almost spooky, though thankfully Paul was nice enough to loan you his walkman to curb the initial silence. Playing his Def Leppard tape you sat back into the couch, breathing through the occasional cramps that would continue to sneak up on you in a pulsing fashion. Hysteria was always your favorite album, as the dulcet tones of the rock ballad began to lull you into a half sleep state. But the continuous bombardment of contractions had begun to grow concerning. They weren’t slowing down, nor consistent in their spaces between as they should be. Cautiously you sat up, counting out the seconds between the first and the next. One minute, two minute, three… and again. For a full minute your muscles spasmed and ached, almost drawing an audible gasp from your mouth. Again you counted. One minute, two, th- no! Now it came again at a two minute interval. In a haste you peeled the headphones from your ears, grasping your stomach as you leaned forward suddenly. Your legs buckled, every time you tried to stand the pain just dragged you back down. “Fuck.. oh go- Paul!”

The blonde vampire was so lost in his own world he was nearly jolted out of his seat by your panicked cries. “What, what’s up you- JESUS!”

Without missing a beat, Paul slipped on the floor beneath his feet, barely having the reflexes to catch himself before his face could meet the ground with a harsh smack. The floor was soaked! Seriously, who spilled water everywhere? “Damn man, what happened here? Why is it all-” again, his words were paused, almost as if they'd been caught in his throat whilst he looked over your doubled over form clutching your profound belly. “Oh- oh shit! Oh fuck no way! Shit, holy fuck shit are you-?? Is it?!”

“Yes! ” You cried out incredulously, cutting off his panicked questioning in a hasty fashion. A sudden cry escaped your lips whilst you gasped in desperation, your spine going erect as you flattened your palms out behind you to stabilize yourself. "Oh god!"

"Oh shit man, I better get Mark-" Paul began, face having dropped to terror.

"No! I swear to go- ow! Paul, if you even dare- I swear I will stake you myself! Ow!"

“What, are you crazy?!” He demanded, jutting his arms in your direction. “You swore you’d call him, dude! This is big, man, he’ll kill me if anything happens to you! Oh fuck but he’ll kill me if I leave you alone- Fuck!” Paul swiftly kicked over one of the tables, running his hands through his mess of hair. The thing looked more like a lions' mane in all honesty. “Bed! We gotta get you to your bed, like now!”

"And how are we gonna do that, asshole?"

Paul's face soured immediately at your insult and with a swift motion, he swung you up into his arms bridal style, paying little mind to your plethora of protests. “Shut up already. I’m not doing this for my fuckin’ health! But you gotta be in bed! I may be a dumbass but I at least know that much!” He muttered, carefully tightening his grip as you attempted to wiggle out from it. He rapidly stepped over tunnels and rocks whilst he swung his way into the cavernous nursery where your bed was nestled into a corner, his calloused fingers on one hand releasing your legs as he pushed the black curtains that draped heavily over the frame. And with that, he placed you gingerly down on the bed, staring at you with a perplexed expression with a hint of something else. Was- no, that couldn't be embarrassment.

"What're you staring at," you questioned, a nervous twinge to your voice. You rolled on your side to relieve some of the pulsating throbs that ran rampant through your muscles.”

"Uh- well- shit! I mean, we need to take off your pants, man. What if you start pushing and the baby suffocate or something?"

“I can’t even start pushing until I know how dilated I am,” your voice was quivering, clutching your stomach. “If I were to push too early it could kill us both.”

"Oh fuck! Where's Marko when you need him?!"

The dreaded predicament was growing increasingly deadly the more your body warned of its approaching birth, and soon you were left with a terrifying decision. Wiping away the thick layer of sweat misting your flushed cheeks, you managed to breathe out a hesitant response. “Paul.. You have to go get him.”

"I’m sorry, WHAT?!" Paul’s voice echoed in the caves at a high pitched octave. “No! No freaking way, I am not leaving you here, you’re having a fucking baby! What if something happens to you? Fuck Marko being haunted, there’s no way I would be able to live with myself!” Paul ranted on, throwing his arms in the air whilst he paced around the sides of your bed in an antsy motion.

Sobs made your chest spasm uncontrollably, rolling over again onto your back. No position provided relief anymore, the contractions following still at an even two minutes each. “It could be hours before I’m actually ready to give birth! We have to know h-how far I am a-and the only way to do that…”

“...Yes? What way, c’mon maybe I can do that!” Paul stopped dead in his tracks to face you, serene as he had ever been in his entire life.

“You’d have to stick your fingers in me,” you groaned with imminent embarrassment, receiving an equal look of humiliation and horror from Paul’s pale face. He looked down, then at the cave’s entrance. Guilt plagued him, this kind of decision had never been put in front of him before. He knew his options were slim, but he also knew where they hunted, if he could catch Marko’s scent outside he could easily find him. But again, he looked at you writhing in pure agony on top of your bed in tears. A knot tore at his own gut like someone was trying to rip them right out of him, his throat aching when he swallowed, a dryness had developed from nerves. “You sure you can handle it until I get back. You fucking swear you’ll be okay? Just for a few minutes.”

You could only nod in response as the pain was so debilitating it rendered you utterly speechless!

“Please, just go get him.” You managed to squeak out intensely. The expression of pain mixed with fear that captured your beautiful features truly did break his heart.

Paul sighed deeply in defeat, his fingers gently pushing your hair from your face. “Stay tough kiddo, I’ll be fast as fucking lightning.” You hadn’t even seen him leave, a huge gust of wind caused the bed to shudder, leaving you utterly and completely alone.

Kicking away your soggy jeans, you promptly pulled yourself to the top of the bed with your back pressed against the headboard. With every passing contraction you fought to breath evenly through it, fingers tightly clutching the sheets beneath you. “Fuck...god Paul hurry please!”

Paul flew as speedily as he could carry himself through the air, his nocturnal eyes aflame, rapidly scanning the ground for any sight of his buddies. The fresh scent of blood wafted through the cool night's air which coaxed him closer to the boardwalk, perhaps a mile or two north. The fucking sand dunes, of course! Sure enough, amongst a towering, crackling bonfire stacked high with the charred remains of surfboards that belonged to screaming Santa Carlites currently being devoured, there he spotted the trio of vampires tearing and ripping into the flesh and bones of unfortunate victims. Their blood spraying in odd directions, splattering across their clothes and hair. "Marko!” Paul yelled far louder than he needed to, panic evident on his countenance whilst he clumsily crash landed into the wind whipped rouge sands below. The display caught the attention of his brothers immediately as they finished off their prey in a geyser of crimson fluids, leaving the ground stained.

Marko dropped the lifeless shriveled up human carcass he had been cradling savagely in his arms to the ground with little interest for it any longer. His previous frail lineament now long gone, replaced with a healthy complexion. Although Marko felt he was back to his full capacity, he couldn't help the immediate apprehension and terror that sparked within his chest as it panged in his gut nauseously. "Paul?! Dude what the fuck are you doing here, where’s Y/N?? What's wrong?" He asked, panic straining his voice.

"Dude! Fucking hurry up! I think Y/n's in labor, man!”

“What the fuck are you talking about,” Marko demanded, grabbing Paul by his jacket. “You fucking left her?!”

“Marko, man, listen! One minute she was okay, the next she's screaming bloody murder and the fucking floors drenched!" Paul panted, doubled over as he'd flown here with all his might. "Before you ask, she's on her bed, okay? I took her there myself, even with her kicking and screaming. Dude I swear I didn’t just ditch! I swear, man I didn't wanna leave her but she said she needed someone to stick their fingers inside her or fucking whatever cuz if she pushes the baby will die, I dunno man but I'm not itching to do that ever!"

Marko said nothing, primal instincts kicking in full throttle as he sailed through the air and headed straight for the cave. His mind wandered to perilous details in furious cluttered thought, things that already created all the more apprehension to to twist in his gut, turning them round and round. His thoughts immediately went to the fact that you were alone in the hotel, in the purest of all agonies, having to go at this on your lonesome. The closer he sailed over the coastline the more he could hear. Your voice was just in the distance carried on the winds in gut wrenching cries that tore him apart. His next thoughts dwindled on your safety as well as the babies. He was very aware that there was no doctor involved in the mix, which meant no hospital and certainly no pain killers. He was terrified as his mind blasted through the worst of the worst. Didn't women used to die of childbirth back in the day? Was there a possibility that you could die?

Marko hadn't even noticed that the others boys had been hot on his heels, prepared to offer aid wherever they could.

"Marko, man! Slow down!" David called, struggling to keep up with the pace in which his pal was flying. The little bugger had gotten a head start, fueled by his pessimistic contemplation. But Marko didn't halt or slow down for that matter. There was no time for any of that! He had to get to the hotel and into your room as swiftly as possible, he wouldn’t dare slow down! What the hell was David even talking about anyway? Slow down?! Slowing down would do nothing but increase the chances of something else going wrong. He knew that the moment you'd spoken the words of, "what could go wrong in a couple of hours", that you had completely and utterly jinxed the entire night!

His body dove and swerved through the hotel passing caves and holes, nearly crashing as he sped to a desperate stop inside the nursery. Your screams were crystal clear, as though they were right there, yet the sound rattled his ribs until he thought he would pass out. Still hidden away behind pitch black curtains, he could almost see your pitiful form writhing in limitlessly excruciating anguish. Rapidly his steps carried him to your bedside where you were still smothered in fresh blood, wrenching away the curtains. The sight was a visage of carnage torn straight from hell itself! Yet you only saw your dearest prince, and it was truly a sight for sore eyes left distorted by cruel tears. His coarse hand clutched yours immediately, providing the first rare moment of sanctity you had felt. The sudden motion and contact from him startled you tremendously, causing you to shriek when another contraction sent you into a panic. "Hey, it's me, baby girl. It's just me." He cooed comforting down at you, his free hand smoothing your damp hair from your sweat slick face. He probably looked like hell, still covered head to toe in his latest victims blood. That probably wasn't the most hygienic state for him to be in during the birthing of his child. But he had to work with what he had. There wasn't exactly running fresh water in the hotel anyway. It was almost unbearable for him to watch you, the color drained from your cheeks, grasping his hand until he swore he heard bones begin to crack.

“Marko.. I-I can’t push yet.. I d-don’t know how far I am,” You choked out, pressing the back of your head into the mattress when pulsating rivers of agony wove through you in cruel waves. The pain was now a disarray of spontaneous choreography, a violent tempo swelling and spreading throughout your entire body, leaving your brain foggy and black spots waltzing at the corners of your vision.

Before Marko was able to utter a word, the three boys bounded into the room, breathless and covered in a film of dampness, no doubt most likely from the crashing waves of the sea that battered along the cliffs' edge. The intrusion was noisy and agitating, leading to Marko's eyes becoming beacons of flourishing orange and his head whipped towards the guys. "Will you guys get lost? I'm not about to have you guys stand there like the Triplets of Fucking Bullshit while I try to figure out how dilated Y/n is!" he practically roared, the cave was shuddering for a moment as specs of dust flitted sporadically to the ground.

“Marko, baby, please calm down," you begged him, placing a hand on his forearm. The sight of him still smeared in blood was one thing, but such rage even at his brothers almost frightened you, his head practically whipping around to face you with fangs bared and piercing white hot eyes tearing into your own. It felt like he had stared straight through into your soul which was certainly not what you needed currently. The petrified expression left plastered across your palored cheeks made Marko feel incredibly remorseful, running his fingers through his hair. He was running on little sleep and barely had enough to satiate his lingering appetite, leaving him still quite exhausted.

"It's fine. We'll clear out. C'mon boys." David stated, Dwayne having already left. He stared pointedly at Paul though, who was staring at you in fright. He felt as though he should be there, however, with David staring at him so intently, he glanced over your way. You could only give him a weakened smile, your gaze assuring him you were safe now. Paul hung his head low and squeezed past the spiked blonde boy briskly. And David followed suit, not sparing another glance your way. It seemed cold but truthfully, David wasn't entirely sure what to make of the situation. Heightened emotions made him uncomfortable. David was better away from this specific spotlight, and currently his friend was in a frenzy he wasn’t willing to have escalated in such a delicate moment. He'd deal with the aftermath once the storm had passed. Marko could deal with the storm singlehandedly if that's what he so desperately desired. I mean, David hadn't knocked you up, so why get his feathers ruffled when he wasn't wanted there anyway?

“You… owe th-them an... a-apology,” you managed to pant out, wearily smacking his arm when a moment of relief between contractions allowed your voice to return.

Marko huffed, shimmying off his jacket and tossing it onto the chair as he climbed on top of the bed with you, shutting the curtains. “I’ll make it up to them later babe, now’s not the fucking time.” Marko grumbled indignantly, his vampiric features morphing back to his human ones.

It was incredibly important for Marko to ensure that you were dilated 10 centimeters. This was not just for the babies sake but also for your own. If you pushed too soon it could prove fatal for you and your child. There was an instinct in you that told you to push, though Marko insisted adamantly that you hold off on pushing for the meantime. Stress riddled Marko to the core as he knelt down in front of you on the bed, his fingers comfortingly stroking your inner thighs prior to pulling back and nearing your entrance. To begin with he slipped in a finger, pushing softly as the books had told him until he reached the surface of the cervix which if he hadn't been reading the books that Dwayne had given him, he would have thought it didn't exist. Instead, he was met with a rubbery balloon-like texture which he knew was the bag of waters that held your baby. He slowly retracted his finger and added a few more, until he was certain that you were way past the 5cm mark. "Ow! B-babe! Tbh-that hurts!" You complained loudly, back arching off the mattress as you flinched, brows knitted together in contorted pain.

"Really?" Marko snapped, eyes meeting yours whilst his fingers froze within you. "You've had much worse in there and a few fingers hurt? Sheesh!" He stated slowly, his expression flattening momentarily. And suddenly, as if by magic, the tension that had been suffocating the pair of you lifted somewhat, causing the pair of you to chortle for a moment before you winced, a grimace clouding your expression.

"Shut up you complete asshole, h-how about I sh-shove a watermelon up you butt, s-s-see how you like it,” you breathlessly laugh, leaning your head back against your pillow. “So, c-can I p-push now, or not?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty certain that you're 10 centimeters now, babe."

Some form of twisted relief washed over your soul in that moment as you let the instinct to push was over you. There was a slow, long drag pulling through your back. It was like a tiger had dug it’s hooked claws into you and was pulling them down through your flesh. The endeavor was tiring, grueling in fact, leaving you dizzy and exhausted. But yet there was a set determination that took over you whilst you pushed desperately. Your toes tightly curled in place, grunts and panting replaced by blood curdling screams that sent chills down any who heard it. Tears made it impossible to see, the salty concoction of tears and sweat staining your face. Everything burned, you were fearful you may pass out. Though as soon as you pushed you found yourself holding your breath, to which Marko had to coach you through how to breathe. A deep breathe in and another deep breathe out. In through the nose out through the mouth. Well, more like, in through the mouth and back out again. He also had to remind you when to rest,especially when he took note of exhaustion blanketing across you.

“Marko- I can’t! No, no! Fuck I can’t it hurts so fucking bad,” you cried out until your throat was raw, having to be snatched by him before you launched up, pinned precisely in place by his steel grip. “No, god, I can’t do this! Please, I-I can’t I can’t it h-hurts!”

"Come on, baby girl you can’t stop now! You have to hold still, it’s gonna be okay, you've got this." Marko encouraged ceaselessly, offering his pale hand to you to hold. Using his other he cemented you in place, knowing one wrong move could kill the baby. Your strength caught him by surprise when you snatched his hand tightly, grateful he couldn’t feel the crushing grasp of your fingers as his dead bones began to crack. Fortunately for him, years of rigor mortis and rot had decayed most of his nervous system by now. He held your head back on his chest, continuing to coax you with tender words. “Almost there baby, almost I know it hurts, I know, I’m so sorry baby." He whispered softly into your ear, his cool breath fanning across your hot flushed skin. You swallowed thickly, almost as though you were in a trance as you continued your strained pushes. A pinkish liquid spilled out and onto the sheets in a cruel, seeping motion. Marko noted it’s scent carried a heavy copper tone and glanced down as the pale salmon tint deepened into a dark crimson hue. Your screams had nearly numbed his ears by now, although it was not a sound he desired to grow accustomed to.

Marko softly unwound his arms around you, though he kept his left hand in your ironclad grip. He needed to ensure that blood was the baby’s head crowning and not some horrendous miscarriage. He wouldn’t dare mention the alternative to his mate mid-birth, pushing away the blankets covering your legs and to his amazement there was your baby's head crowning momentarily before slipping back inside. From what he'd read, this was a completely normal process, your pushing, in conjunction with your contractions would continue to shift the baby down the birthing canal and out of you. Your heels dug into the mattress with your back arching upward as your mouth was aghast in treacherous suffering, a hideous cry drawing tears from your eyes. The room began to sway, the pace of your heart was that of wild horses unleashed on an open plain. Heat grasped you from every angle, it was getting harder to breathe the more you fought through it. Fear grabbed hold of your lungs, squeezing violently, picking up your heart rate until Marko could hear it thundering beneath your rib cage like a frightened animal wanting to be let loose of its cage. Your rapid labored breaths carried a concerning pace that had him beside you once again.

“Marko.. T-the room..,” you tried to whimper out between screams, head swaying to the side staring at the pitch black curtains that somehow seemed to be seeping into your surroundings. You could feel the drag pulling down your back into your birth canal, you were so close but the sheer exhaustion tempted you to faint at any moment. “I..I can’t..” you gasped out under your breath so quiet he almost thought he'd imagined the words.

"Just one more push, babe," Marko pleaded, brushing his hand over your damp forehead. In a sweet, yet ardent motion your hair was pushed back from your face. You clung to his hand, pressing your forehead against his frigid palm savoring the relieving rush of cold. The sight of his wide eyes connecting with yours forced a momentary breath of air, those perfect blue pools gave you something to focus on. The blackness was scattered, a last scream forcing it's way out of your throat as you gave one final push, the dragging motion within you halting. Light faded in and out of your vision, rapid black splotches flickering around the room, the pain becoming dull and pulsating. You hardly even noticed the muffled, shrill cries emitting from your newborn, or the fact that Marko had already had her wrapped in a towel once he'd cut the umbilical cord. Your chest shuddered when you breathed, the small pink infant squirming beneath white fabric making whimpering grunts. Small fingers stretched out, clutching at Marko’s shirt.

“Marko.. Wh-what are they,” you groaned our, flickering lashes barely keeping you conscious.

Marko hesitated to glance between misted eyes, choking out a stunned laugh. “A girl…”

The blood stained her red skin, and before he could wipe away the sticky red substance off her fingers she suckled at the red liquid, eyes bright white just as his were when his fangs were bared. She had yet to form her own, and when there was none left on her hand they had faded back into little grey, uncolored orbs. The lack of food had become noticable, and she let out a fussy whine, kicking her feet against the blanket in a fit. So that's what she needed to feed on. Marko gently bounced her in his arms, nuzzling his forehead against hers until her tantrum was subdued. “Shhh shhh, it’s okay baby girl.. Plenty of time for that later... Daddy will bring you a big ol bag of blood when mommy feels better, I promise.”

You blinked away tears as she was delicately passed into your arms, weighing no more than eight or nine pounds just as weary as you were. “Wilhelmina...,” you choked out, brushing your fingers across her plump cheek.

“Billie huh?” Marko asked, laying on his side beside you with his bent arm elevating his head, his fingers reached out to brush against the blonde dusting of hair on the head of his daughter, a grin plastered on his face, an exhausted twinkle dancing in his eyes. "I like that... Wilhelmina it is.."

He now felt like finally, in these eight months of your pregnancy, that he could catch some shut eye. Time had become distorted, he had no idea whether it was daytime or night time any more, the two may as well have been blurred together. In your safe haven of thick black flowing curtains, Marko placed Billie delicately into your heavy arms, slumber already having wrapped you tightly in its deep and vast embrace. He curled his fingers around the dark fabric, pulling it skeptically out of the way. The room was swallowed in darkness, however, his nocturnal eyes easily scoped out the shut door at the other end of the room. He thought for a minute, capturing his bottom lip in between his teeth. He chewed on it for a moment before pulling himself up and off the bed. Truthfully now that his territorial rage had fizzled out he knew he owed the guys for how much of an ass he'd been when confronted with your unexpected labor.

With tentative steps, so as not to disturb you, Marko flitted towards the shut door, no light seeping underneath the crack of the door. He twisted the knob carefully, a low squeak creeping into the air as he opened the door. He stepped out into the passageway leading to the main cave and began a somewhat hurried stroll. Honestly he was ecstatic to tell the boys. To show them his daughter was something he was practically bouncing on the spot for he couldn't wait!

Marko, briefly unaware with his contemplation cluttering his mind, did not fully register the danger as he stepped forward into a stream of sunlight just up ahead cutting clearly through the decrepit roof of the hotel. It wasn't until the searing sizzle of his flesh did he register that he was caught aflame from the sun's rays. With a shriek he recoiled, battering at exposed flesh to kill the flames. He smoldered for a moment, back pressed to the wall as he peered into the vacant lobby of the ancient hotel. He sighed, shaking his head in dismay. "Dammit! Well... I guess they'll just have to meet Billie tonight then," he concluded with finality, not giving it much thought before he turned and made his way back to your room with heavy eyelids, finally content. As he padded softly into the room, shutting the door behind him, Marko couldn't help but feel relief wash over him. It was an enormous weight lifted from his shoulders now that he'd be able to go out to feed without fearing something could happen to you. That was more than enough to cure him of any and all anxiety that had previously immobilized him.

As he settled himself underneath the covers, he brought you closer, baby Billie placed tenderly between you both and he grinned half halfheartedly, a dopey, wide grin that pulled on his heavy eyelids. "I'm kinda glad you jinxed it, babe." he breathed into the air before he allowed the weight of sleep to shut his eyes and encapsulate him in its lulling motion.

173 notes · View notes

crohnsawarenessproject · 3 years

Text

I’ve done it, I’ve been on one of the scariest medical adventures of my life to date. I’ve now sat in an ER watching bags of blood being transfused into my body after hitting a scary low red blood cell level due to chronic bleeding issues that snowballed over the last couple of months. Things were a mixed bag at first. Doctors worried the Entyvio wasn't working and instead could be causing my severe bleeding.

Let’s take a step back.

A few months ago, my Entyvio was adjusted from every eight weeks to every four weeks, which was around the same time my temporary GI had switched my standing blood work order from every month to every two months. Shortly after these changes, I started to see blood in my stool.

At first I didn’t think too much of it. A lot of us living with IBD have experienced blood in our stools. It’s not unheard of. A weekend went by, though, where it was just non stop. Everytime I went to the washroom, I would lose a fair amount of blood. Sometimes It would just be blood.

My initial reaction was that it was something I’d eaten. I thought about it, realizing my intake of beef had gone up that week and usually that would cause some issues for me. That had to be it. So I cut back on my beef.

Another week of constant bleeding went by without letting up. I was starting to feel it now. I was getting a bit scared. I reached out to friends and family and someone mentioned that, ‘women lose blood every month so [I] should be fine,’ so I let it slide again.

A few more weeks passed, no changes, I was really starting to feel it now and my blood work was finally in. I could show them what was going on. I had proof. The results show my hemoglobin sitting at 80 points and the rest of my profile being completely out of whack. This should light a fire, and I’d be the one to start it. '

I called the GI office asking for iron (this is all I knew to ask for at the time), stating what I was going through and how I felt. At this point I could barely stand and or walk. My heart felt like it wanted to race out of my chest. I was getting really scared now. I’ve never felt this bad throughout everything I’ve gone through. This was getting to be too much.

This is when they set up an emergency scope. Another week passed before scope day arrived. It was determined that my guts were pretty clean. They mentioned hemorrhoids but an ER doctor clarified that they were only level one which causes minimal issues. This proved a point that I had been trying to make previously, that my health was better than ever, where my Crohn's was considered. This was new. Is new. '

However at that exact moment I wasn’t feeling that great. I was also supposed to receive iron and/or a blood transfusion that day but it never ended up happening. This was a Friday and we all know what would happen over the next couple of days. Absolutely nothing. I knew the numbers everyone was working with were old. Too old. They didn’t have all the current facts nor did they understand how bad I felt.

I tried calling and leaving a message for the doctor just the same. Maybe I could make it to Monday and they could just get me into the IV lab real fast. Well, I barely made it to Monday but thankfully they got back to me first thing in the morning informing me that to get in for IV therapy would take over a week and that I should go to the ER if I believed I needed it sooner. That was an understatement, so we immediately started packing, getting me ready for the ER.

Once we arrived we managed to get through triage pretty quick. I told them what was going on and the moment I noticed a brow begin to furrow I reached into my bag, producing the blood work results from two weeks prior. The moment they saw the numbers things got moving.

Going back through my medical records, I’ve noticed that I’ve never really been in the normal hemoglobin levels but I rarely was under 100 points. When they did my blood work in the ER I was sitting at a cool 40, a number they claimed they hadn’t seen in some time.

Hey, at least I’m shaking things up. Going on new adventures. Like how when they moved me to the trauma ward to give me my IV. Something that normally goes pretty smoothly for me. I have big juicy veins, although they do roll, but as long as I bring this up, it’s usually accounted for. Not this time. No.

First of all, this was the most painful of any IV I’ve ever had, and it started when they accidentally blew a vein in my forearm, causing blood to squirt all over my leg and the floor, they then moved to my hand to put two more in. The pain was almost more than I could take, I wasn’t ready for this when I came in but at least the job was done and they were placed. I thanked my nurse as I always do and I was moved to another section.

I was still pretty chill at this point even though things weren’t the best. I knew why I was there and what I wanted, but there was one thing I wasn’t ready for. A new nurse came in to tell me what was on the docket. I was lined up for a blood transfusion. Three bags worth, but I was going to be admitted and the procedure states that you need to be COVID swabbed. My heart dropped, my smile disappeared and my heart which had slowed a touch since arriving began to pump faster. I had never had a COVID swab. I’ve kept home away from everyone and everything and always wear my mask while I’m out.

Now my thoughts were racing due to the things I had heard or read about in the past regarding people's experiences swabbing. I was so thankful for the fact that I had a very kind and patient nurse who talked me through the entire thing and after everything I had gone through getting the IVs in my arm, it was a piece of cake. It didn’t feel great, that’s for sure. But it was nowhere near as bad as I thought and not even on the same level as what I had gone through with the IVs. Teaching me that my years of experiences have helped me to build a thicker skin. Something younger me wouldn’t have been able to comprehend.

The rest of the night was fairly uneventful. They gave me my first bag of blood, during which the ER doc came to talk to me. They basically wanted a GI doctor to go over everything with me, but they were good after I told them that my Crohn’s was doing pretty good and that I had all of that under control with my GI/GP and that it was my GI’s office that had instructed me to come in for the transfusion.

Shortly after my first bag of blood, I was moved into my own private room in another section of the ER where I received another two bags of blood. I’d end up spending another 8 hours through the night watching my tablet, unable to get any kind of sleep due to the warm temperature of the room. Once the morning shift nurse arrived, I was up, showing how much better I was feeling, ready to go home but it’d be another hour before they’d make it to my room.

Luckily the ER doctor fully agreed with my self-diagnosis, releasing me to be picked up and taken home. We made sure to hit up my favourite diner on the way home, filling me up with a good breakfast after a long night.

The moment I got home I called up my GI office requesting to get the new monocyte iron infusion I was promised the week before as well as to have them revert my standing order back to every month as I was not comfortable with it staying at every two. I was put on Entocort to try and heal some ulcers and it seems that for now it has mostly stopped the bleeding. I’m not entirely convinced that we’ve solved the problem, but for now we’ve put a very good bandaid on it.

Have you ever had serious issues with your hemoglobin before? How’d you and your medical team navigate it? Tell us in the comments below.

#bleeding #blood #health issues #crohn's awareness project #cap #cap funnies #funnies #web comic #original comic #laughter is the best medicine #outhouse cartoons #crohn's disease #IBD #inflamatory bowel disease

3 notes · View notes

the-trashy-phoenix · 4 years

Text

Supernatural season 4 review (part 2)

Link to part 1:

Irene and I have finished season 4, finally, and I was surprised I still liked it like the first time I've watched it. I couldn't wait to get there (who knows why?) and I was actually afraid I wouldn't get as excited as I thought I would; but fortunately it still gives me the idea that it is one of the best Supernatural seasons.

It all starts with Dean coming back from hell and being clueless about how he did it. He soon finds out the Angel Of The Lord Castiel held him tight and raised him from perdition and that he has a fundamental role in the intent to stop Lilith's plans to free Lucifer from his cage and unleash the Apocalypse.

Will this review (and probably the next 11 ones) most likely be a little bit biased for Destiel? Definitely. Will I try to stay as objective as I can? Yes, but this doesn't mean I'll be very objective, after all I'm writing this review knowing what is going to happen in the next seasons (and, more precisely, in the scene, you know which one I'm talking about).

I honestly don't even know where to start, so I'm going to comment on what I think is important as the season goes on.

I believe 04x01 is one of the best episodes of this season (and maybe even one of my favourite episodes ever) for several reasons. We have Dean coming back from hell and meeting again with Bobby and Sam (and both of these moments are very touching, especially Sam's one). Although the reunion might be heartwarming, Sam is already keeping secrets from Dean: he is collaborating with Ruby to defeat Lilith (and in the meantime he's using his powers, which are stronger than ever, cause he's drinking demon blood to increase them). He lies to Dean, telling him he stopped trying to use his abilities against the enemy, and that causes the biggest drama between the two brothers this season (that will continue on the next one). Dean (and the others) wants to find out who's trying to contact him and who brought him back from hell: I love the way Castiel is slowly introduced during this episode. At first with the ultrasounds and the handprint (which is definitely a fantastic touch, that kinda shows a little possessive side if you think about it, and it is inevitably funny if you know everything that happens later on), then through Pamela, showing already all his power, and at the end of the episode there's a "dramatic" moment where Dean (and Bobby) finally meets Castiel (in his vessel) for the first time, and this might be one of the most epic and iconic scenes in Supernatural. The dynamic between these two is fantastic from the beginning (am I saying this because I'm totally biased?) and the line "What's the matter? You don't think you deserve to be saved?" shows how Castiel has already understood Dean Winchester from just a look (and he's an angel who's not supposed to feel or understand feelings! Wow, the power of Destiel).

Moving on from this episode, in the second one we find out from Castiel that Lilith wants to break the 66 seals, foretelling the Apocalypse, in order to free Lucifer. On a side note, I like how bitchy Castiel is towards Dean at the beginning of their relationship ("Read the Bible. Angels are warriors of God. I'm a soldier", "You should show me some respect, I dragged you out of hell, I can throw you back in").

I love episode 04x03 because I usually adore time travel (it often leads to some funny and very unusual situations) and I find this one extremely sad and touching, mostly because Dean has the opportunity to meet his parents when they are still young (and Mary and John's sides he didn't know about) and finds out how their family became cursed (and the worst thing is he can't change its destiny).

In episode 04x04 Dean finds out Sam has been working with Ruby this whole time and gets mad about it, which is pretty reasonable. As much as a part of me hates when Sam and Dean fight, another part of me loves it, especially in this season, and it's probably because I think both of them are right and wrong at the same time. Ruby seems reliable (for now much more than the angels) and Sam truly did some good with her, so it is logical for Sam to trust her, since she apparently hasn't done anything against him and she has also saved him (which Sam confesses to Dean on episode 04x09). On the other hand I understand why Dean wouldn't want his brother to continue his process of strengthening his powers: he's afraid Sam won't be the same. Plus his brother lied to him, so it becomes hard for Dean to trust him, and this episode marks a pretty sad change in their relationship that will only get worse later in the season.

I should also mention 04x07 in which two witches want to bring Samhain, a celtic god, back from the dead. By doing that another of the 66 seals would be broken so Dean and Sam, who were working on the case, are told by Castiel and Uriel (another angel) that Uriel has to destroy the city, since the two brothers can't stop the witches from bringing Samhain back. Dean wants to prevent Uriel from doing a massacre and convince Castiel to wait for a few hours and let them take care of the witches. They can't stop them and Sam confronts Samhain using his powers, although he promised Dean he wouldn't use them anymore. At the end of the episode Castiel confesses to Dean that his orders were to follow Dean's instructions and admits he has doubts towards God. I consider this conversation very important, since this is the first time Castiel lets Dean have a look at his inner thoughts, even if Castiel himself is afraid of them, which gets me thinking that he already trusts Dean.

I also wanted to point out that Dean starts calling Castiel "Cas" pretty soon, even if he doesn’t want to trust him yet (although I believe he already does unconsciously). And what's even funnier is that, by calling him "Cas", he removes from his name the part that means "of God", which kinda gives you already an idea of what it's going to happen to him.

In episode 04x09 we meet Anna, a fallen angel, who doesn't even remember she has ever been one, since now she's human and has lived a human life for years. Dean and Sam meet her because she seems to be capable of getting in contact with the angels and is suddenly wanted from both angels (who want her death because she rebelled from heaven) and demons (one of them is Alastair, who knows Dean from hell). Anna and Dean form a sort of bond and she tells him she fell from heaven because she fell in love with humanity (they also have sex in the Impala, but that's way less relevant, although I want to point out that she covers Castiel's mark on Dean's shoulder with her hand, which is a bit disturbing). They can't stop the angels from coming for her so when they arrive we see a beautiful totally not programmed and still hilarious scene of Dean and Anna kissing and Castiel looking at first intensively at them and then shamefully at the ground. I mean, what was that? I understand that Anna and Castiel are sort of parallels, because they are both two angels falling from humanity (they also talk about feelings and Castiel confesses he has already started having emotions), but isn't it the whole point of Destiel? An angel that falls in love with humanity because of one man (Dean, if that wasn't already obvious)? And we get this concept involuntarily since season four? That's… funny. Apart from all of that, Anna manages to get her grace back and hides from Castiel and Uriel.

Another important element in this episode, and in the whole season, is Dean's experience in hell, in which time works differently (four months equivalent to forty years). He finally tells Sam what it has been like and totally breaks down as he says he has spent thirty years being tortured and, since he couldn't resist anymore, the ten left torturing other souls. He also adds in the next episode, with shame, that in torturing souls he felt pleasure, because all the pain felt as a victim disappeared: this is what devastated him the most. I feel like Dean's time in hell inevitably shaped his personality a lot in this season, but it's a thing that changes him forever. He is more mature and somehow self-aware (and I love this aspect), but he's also way more desperate and hopeless (a trade I think characterises Dean way more than Sam in every season, but that's definitely more persistent in this one than it's ever been). I might be a bit sadistic, but I don't mind the bad parts Dean has kept from hell either: they show us a vulnerable side that Dean has always tried to hide. There's also the evident contraposition between Sam's physical power and apparent strong state of mind and Dean's unstable, weak and soft one (also relative to what Dean's big role is in this season and what Sam is actually capable of doing to prevent the apocalypse).

I'd talk about episode 04x14 just to mention the fact that the siren (who's supposed to turn into the person who should most sexually attract his victim) decides to show himself to Dean as a man. I get he was supposed to replace Sam's role as a brother, but the whole setting, the fact that sirens' attractiveness is usually sexual and the fact that even the actor who played the siren admitted the whole scene was a bit sensual should tell us something (it also seems funny that they had to precise multiple times he was trying to be his brother because otherwise that would have seemed too gay, it still seems gay, but whatever).

In episode 04x16 someone is killing the angels and Castiel asks Dean for help to find out who the killer is. The angels have the demon Alastair captured and Castiel tells Dean he's the only one who can torture him. The angel seems to be really upset about it, because he knows how this could hurt Dean, since this is what he has been doing for the past ten years in hell. Dean decides to do it anyway and he finds out from Alastair, during the torture, that he is the one who has broken the first seal (by deciding to torture souls) and made the first step to bring Lucifer back. This obviously breaks Dean even more, since he already hates what he has done in hell, and makes him believe he's not capable of doing what the angels want from him (and he admits it to Castiel, and in the next episode his superior Zacharia tries to convince Dean he's the right man by showing him that even in other realities he would end up killing monsters). We later find out that the one who killed the angels was Uriel that, hating humans, was on Lucifer's side. He asks Castiel to join him but he refuses and Anna, saving Castiel from a fight with Uriel, kills him. I don't have much thoughts on Uriel, I didn't like him even when he was supposedly on the good side. The only thing I like about him is that he had already acknowledged the fact that Castiel likes Dean (who would've thought?).

I have to mention episode 04x18 as I think is one of my favourites of the season and that starts a series of other fantastic episodes (and basically another reality). Sam and Dean find out their life has been written (and published) by Chuck, who's apparently a prophet of God (and turns out to be quite useful later on). This is one of my favourite things Supernatural likes to do: metanarrative. In my opinion it really brings out something new and extremely funny (especially since I know this won't be the last time the two brothers will have to deal with Supernatural).

Another important episode is 04x19, where Sam and Dean find out they have a stepbrother, Adam, who doesn't know about their dad's secret life of hunting. It's obvious the most hurt by the situation is Dean, who would have never thought John could lie about something like that and who's somehow jealous of Adam, since he had the opportunity to live a normal life that could have been possible for him and Sam as well. The one thing that surprised me was that he didn't want him to learn how to hunt (unlike Sam, who thought it could be a good idea for Adam to know how to protect himself). I think Dean shows how he has changed throughout the years and now believes that, since the kid had the opportunity to live a normal life, he doesn't want him to experience what they have. He's more mature and he has become way better than his father and it's funny how now Sam is the one who thinks more like John (although I think there is still a relevant difference between the two of them, fortunately). We eventually find out that it wasn't Adam, but the monster they were fighting, and that Adam is already dead: at first I was a little bit surprised because I remembered that Adam would be in the next season, but it's Supernatural, so I should be used to it by now.

The next episode is important especially for showing us sides of Castiel's life that were not entirely clear before: in this case we find out how the angel reached out his vessel, Jimmy Novak. As much as I can see why Castiel had to occupy Jimmy's body, it's totally understandable that the man wants to go back to his life and that he doesn't want anything more to do with Castiel and everything about him. I also understand that he doesn't want to be with the Winchesters, although objectively they are right to want to keep him away from his family. In general the situation is definitely complicated and, from Jimmy's point of view, quite tragic. We can also tell Castiel, as much as he is already more empathic than the other angels, is not human and can't quite think like one, even if he has Dean who shows him his perspective. Knowing everything that happens to him later on makes me understand how much he has changed throughout the seasons (and knowing who has made that change possible warms my heart). It was quite strange to see Castiel acting like this since at this point I'm used to the Castiel in the latest seasons, but overall I like him a lot in the earlier ones as well.

At this point of the season, drinking demon blood for Sam has become like a drug and Dean can't continue to let his brother ruin himself like that, so with Bobby he decides to lock him in Bobby's panic room. I understand Dean is scared of what Sam could become and is becoming, but at this point Sam is at a level so high that he can't make it without demon blood, and staying for a long time without it could really hurt him further. It also seems that Sam is the only solution to kill Lilith and end the arrival of the Apocalypse. Of course Dean continues to argue that it's best to exclude Sam from this matter given his status, but Sam runs away and tracks down Ruby, with whom he's been working all season trying to be as discreet as possible so as not to worry Dean.

Sam's series of lies, the concern that he might become a monster, and the close collaboration with Ruby increase Dean's anger and disappointment with his brother throughout the season. He no longer trusts him and this deeply saddens both Sam and Dean himself, because he realizes that something has broken between them by now. As much as Sam may have his good reasons for wanting to work with Ruby (and he has), I think he's handled this situation in the worst possible way and that Dean is right about not trusting him anymore (or maybe I'm just a little conditioned by my love for Dean).

I think another reason that has increased the anger towards Sam is the fact that he has repeatedly admitted that he has been decidedly stronger than Dean since he was in hell. It's probably something they both agree on, but Dean is used to considering himself weak and not strong enough to sustain a certain situation. The thing that saddens Dean the most is the fact that his brother thinks so too.

However, this conflict ends with a fight between the two after Dean is able to find his brother. As much as I'm on Dean's side, I hated it when he called Sam a monster, because he knows that's the biggest fear that haunts his brother and calling it like that must have really destroyed him. After the fight everyone goes for his path: Sam with Ruby and Dean, finally convinced by Castiel, with the angels.

Shortly after, however, he discovers that his real role is not to stop the Apocalypse but to stop Lucifer, because he will be Micheal's vessel, and that when Lilith is killed the last seal will be broken, giving way to the Apocalypse. Dean disagrees with the angels and tries to convince Castiel to side with him and abandon the angels to try to stop the Apocalypse.

The twist itself is well constructed, although in my opinion, to make it even better, they could have shown angels as decidedly more reliable creatures, and then break all our trust (and with it also Dean's hopes). During the end of the season, apart from Castiel, the most reliable one seems to be Ruby. And that's why I think this is a much better twist: Sam completely relied on the demon, who always proved to be there for him, and to kill Lilith seems like the most logical move to make to prevent Lucifer from resurrecting. Even when I knew Ruby was cheating Sam the dynamic seemed so unexpected to me that I didn't even remember how she would do it. On top of that Sam's willingness to kill Lilith (mostly for revenge) and to stop the rise of Lucifer is actually what permits Lucifer to rise. So I can only imagine how guilty Sam felt after he realized what he had done (and the worst but best thing at the same time is that it's not even his fault, not entirely at least). Eventually the two brothers open and close the circle of the Apocalypse's arrival, which adds a touch of perfection to the whole situation.

Dean, after convincing Castiel to side with him, goes to Chuck to find where Lilith, Ruby and Sam are. Castiel transports Dean to Sam and tries to stop the angels who want the Apocalypse to begin, losing his life. This is another great step Castiel takes for Dean against his own brothers, proving that he now considers himself at Dean's side more than any other person's side. Dean arrives too late to stop Sam, who has already killed Lilith, and the fourth season ends with a confused and desperate Sam, an angry and desperate Dean, and Lucifer returning.

In the end I believe that this is the best season of Supernatural so far for several reasons: the arrival of Castiel who adds new aspects both to the Supernatural universe (talking about angels) and to the character of Dean (and later also to that of Sam), the continuous struggle between the two brothers, Ruby's character (which I think has been made quite effectively and which has also improved this season, as well as her relationship with Sam), the plot twist and the change that hell caused in Dean.

Usually this is considered one of the best seasons of Supernatural, and I completely agree, but having seen the series with long time gaps I feel I'll be able to judge only at the end of the fifteenth if this (and the fifth) are actually the best seasons of Supernatural, at least for me.

- Carly 💚

2 notes · View notes