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#also this is my first time writing a love letter so sorry if it;s a little meh
reallyromealone · 3 months
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This doesn't have to be a request if you don't want to write it. But can you imagine what it would be like to be the boyfriend in a poly relationship with Zoro and Sanji? Like Zoro focuses more on his swords, drinking, and napping. But Sanji focuses on women, cooking, and smoking. I'd feel so bad because while you love them both, you just don't feel like they actually love you as much.
Sorry for that. I just saw a angsty headcannon on pinterest and my heart just broke. Also how is Lily???? We miss seeing her so much
Title: endings
Fandom: one piece
Characters: strawhat crew
Fic type: angst
Pairings: Zoro x reader x Sanji
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, angst, gay
Notes:
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
(Name) Loved his boyfriends.
He really did.
But... He often felt that they didn't love him as much.
Zoro was always out drinking or napping or showing more love to swords than his partners... Always blowing off (name)s ideas for dates or dinners or anything that he didn't want to do even slightly.
Want to go for a walk? Nah, rather nap.
Want to go to dinner at a nice restaurant? Nah rather get drunk with friends.
And then there was Sanji.
Flirting with women, cooking to the point of obsession and even snapping at (name) for entering his kitchen and a nicotine addiction that made him worry.
He had shitty boyfriends.
He was aware.
And so was everyone, seeing as Nami let Sanji flirt with her and buy her things.
What a traitor or was she ever on his side?
He was an outsider in his own relationship, unsure what to do.
But he believed he had an answer to it all and he hated it.
(Name) Walked to deck where he saw his boyfriends drinking and partying with the others, staring at Sanji chatting up the girls and Zoro absolutely tanked, eyes growing empty and distant at the sight.
It was usopp who noticed (name) first and went up to him "you alright?" He asked the other who slowly stared at the black haired man "I'm fine... I just realized I have something to do"
(Name) Took a quill and some parchment and wrote up his breakup letter before placing it on Sanji's bed, knowing he was more likely to read it before grabbing his bag and belongings.
A quick conversation with Luffy and a mournful goodbye from him and (name) left the ship, the captain understanding why he needed time to himself and to think things over, giving him a compass as a parting gift.
(Name) Didn't know how they would react or if they cared but he knew this was what he needed to do.
And hopefully he would come out happier.
611 notes · View notes
winterarmyy · 1 year
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Promise Me | Part I
When he was sent out for war, Bucky made a promise to his lover that might just last through several lifetimes.
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Summary: Y/N kept being reincarnated into the world for seemingly endless of lifetimes with the lasting, vivid memories of her past lover during the 40's, Sargent James B. Barnes. While she thought this was a 'punishment' for her sins, she was also unknowingly oblivious to the fact that James was still alive somewhere, almost forever frozen in the time.
Navigation: Part I | Part II | Part III (end)
Words: 6.5k++ (hella long bc lots to cover in the story building part)
Pairing: 40s!bucky / eventually tfatws!bucky x female!reader
Warnings: just slow induced angst for your daily consumption (i guess?) It has a hopeful ending so don't let the first warning chase you away. reincarnation concept. an attempt to follow exact mcu timeline (forgive if i'm wrong at certain parts). slight religious contents. grief & loss. graphic violence. deaths. mention of suicide. a lot of reader's pov, story building > dialogs (sorry guys).
P/S: Another impulsive writing from me y'all. I hope you don't get bored of this tendency of mine lol. I just need to let the fantasies out before it consumes me. So... anyway, it's gonna be another 3 parts fic cause for the love of god, I cannot commit for more :') Also, my first attempt of writing 40's bucky!!! I'm honestly scared. I hope you like it!
Read my other works here: Masterlist
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Italy, 1943 – His return
If it was one thing that Bucky should expect when he decided to be in a relationship with Y/N was that he had to accept her for who she was; stubborn, clumsy, bold, clever, sweet and most certainly the prettiest dame he ever met.
He might have unknowingly signed up for it the moment he quite literally fell for her at one of those Stark's science expo. Bucky had been stealing glances at this one pretty lady in the crowd, adored in soft mint dress that falls right below her knees.
It wasn't even a scandalous dress to wear in public but somehow Bucky was more than ecstatic to marvel at her beauty. There was no such thing as a too long of a stare, especially when she laughed like that; throwing her head in amusement, the loose strands of her curls fall back across her shoulders as they slightly shook to the rhythm of her laughter.
A careless misstep, that Bucky could see from a mile away, had caused her to stagger backwards and twisted her ankle into an inevitable fall. Somehow, Bucky managed to slither his way through the crowd towards her, almost jumping forward to catch her before she landed on the ground.
Not only that he was the one who fell first, but he also fell hard.
So, it was expected that Bucky knew what he had got himself into. At least, that was what Y/N had been repeating in her head to convince herself for what she had done. Now that she was sitting at the back of the wobbly military truck, the fear had slowly started to seep into her, causing shivers to crawl all over her nerves.
Y/N just knew it in her guts that Bucky would be absolutely furious when he sees her but what does he expect her to do when she hadn't receive any letters from him for months now. So, when she heard that they needed more medical helpers at the Italy base, she signed up without thinking twice about it.
"There has been a recent attack on the 107th. Too many casualties and much more whose heavily injured. You might have your hands full the moment you arrive to the base. There are few rules..." The lieutenant's voice was rigid just as his demenour when he continued to inform the situation to the troops of medical staff.
No matter how much she wanted to pay attention to his words, Y/N couldn't help but to tune in only at his first few sentences. Casualties, heavily injured. Her hands moved to search for the cross pendent hanging from the necklace around her collarbone, gripping it tight as she prayed that her lover was not categorized under any of those dire circumstances.
What the lieutenant said in that truck could never be more true as the moment they stepped into the medic tent, Y/N and the others were quickly pulled to assist the fallen men. It was truly heartbreaking and horrid to witness the dreading truth behind what the public posed as the "heros of the country'.
Surely they were proud to fight for the nation but then again no human being should ever had to suffer the consequences of war; not the civilians and certainly not the soldiers.
After seemingly hours of continuous stitching, wrapping and patching up; surrounded sound of groaning pain and the endless cycle of inhaling the distinct scent of fresh blood, burned flesh and the bitter of anticeptic odor; the injured soldiers were finally taken care of and had been put to rest.
Y/N looked around the tent, noting the unorganized mess around the patients; the result of the panic and chaos of the whole situation. A thought came to her mind, she might need to do some cleaning up before writing down medical record for each one of the patients.
That was when the lieutenant entered into the tent, and his stern gaze swiftly analyzed the much calmer scene, "Thank you for your service, everybody. I assume the soldiers are stabilized?"
"Yes, sir." One of the battalion doctor replied as he approached, while the rest of the team watched from where they stood.
The lieutenant simply nodded, "Good." He paused for awhile and looked around,  "Now, have any of you met Captain America before?"
There were bunch of no's murmured around the medical staff, some of them just shook their head as an answer and the lieutenant nodded again as he informed, "Well, I guess you are all just darn lucky cause he's here to perform. You are invited to come and join the others to watch, if you want to."
"Steve's here?" She thought to herself.
As the lieutenant continued to explain some things about accommodation, food and medical supplies, Y/N's head were filled with thought that her dear friend, Steve was there too.
"I wonder if he gotten any words from James."
"Maybe he got letters from him?"
"Or could it be that he was here to find James too?
There were so many questions kept circulating in her head that by the time she snapped out of them, the lieutenant was already long gone and some of the medic staff went out to untangle themselves from the hours of stressful tension.
As a nurse herself, she felt the need to take care of her patients and finish her job before anything else. So, she started to clean up the shredded clothes, bloodied guazes and the other medical tools that needed to be sterilized and put away.
By the time she finished, it finally dawned to her that there was no trace of Bucky in the medic tent. Which means he didn't fall into the heavily injured category. So, there was two left; the one she prayed for and the other that dreaded her to even think about.
Y/N quickly made her way towards the tent where she can find the soldier in charge. However, if she was focused during one of the lieutenant's speech in the truck, she would've heard that she and the others were not authorized to enter certain parts of the base, which include the higher ups' tents.
When she was turned down by the soldiers, she sadly walked away towards the main area where Steve was supposed to perform. The drag of her feet across the dusty sand was heavy but no more heavier than the burden in her heart.
She watched as her black pump shoes gradually covered with light sand. Finding it odd that a few weeks ago she was standing on the shiny tile of a hospital in Brooklyn and now she was halfway across the world in the middle of the chaos of a war.
The things she'd do for love.
Soon enough, the dry ground was wet from the sudden down pour, turning it into a murky soggy path. Y/N quickly ran towards the main area where apparently the show was long over. "Did I missed Steve?" She thought as she stepped into the tent where the performers supposed to be.
The tent turned out to be empty and only the sound of drizzling raindrops above it was left behind. She looked around the area and saw the costumes for the performers were still there; the pleated white and red skirt hanging on the rack, white gloves clipped with them, the captain's shield with notes sticking at the back of it and the iconic blue helmet-mask thingy plastered with the obvious letter.
She peeked a little to the right only to see Steve hunched down on the floor, curling into himself just as he always did back when he was left beaten up in the alleyway somewhere in Brooklyn. She guessed that the upgrade of his size doesn't really change his habits.
Y/N walked closer to see him holding his sketchbook on one hand and another was a pencil pressing across the paper, lining the drawing of a monkey on a unicycle. "I guess the serum does not amplify your art skills huh Steve?" she teased as she approached the blonde man.
Steve lifted up his head as he turned towards the familiar voice, "y/n?" His face lit up as he recognized her face. He stood on his feet and pulled her into a tight hug, "It's so good to see you." He sighed, he haven't seen her since his departure when she insisted for him to stay.
But alas, Steve was also as stubborn as her.
It took awhile for him to process it but when it came to him, he gently pushed her away, "Wait.. what are you doing here?" His brows creased into a worried frown.
Y/N simply smiled as she responded, "They needed help, so I volueentered."
Steve shook his head in disbelief, "Bucky made me promise not to let you do stuff like this." In which Y/N countered, "And he also remind you not to do anything stupid until he get back so..." she purposely trailed her words for him to draw the conclusion on his own.
He let out a long sighed before concluding, "Bucky's gonna kill us."
Since, Bucky was in the topic, Y/N took the oppurtunity to asked Steve about him, "About that, have you heard--"
A woman's voice came from her back, cutting in between her words, "Steve?"
Steve nervously untangled himself from Y/N as he shyly greeted the woman, "Hi."
The woman continued to stare at Y/N trying to figure out her role and relationship with Steve but before she could get any strange idea, he quickly introduced her, "This is y/n. She's my good friend from home."
A spark of realization glint through her eyes "I see. I'm Peggy. Nice to meet you." She extended her hand towards Y/N, in which Y/N gladly shook it in hers as she reintroduced herself, "You too. I'm y/n."
After the brief exchange of smile between the two ladies, Steve continued to asked Peggy, "What are you doing here?"
Peggy sighed as she explained, "Officially, I'm not here at all." She paused as she picked her words, "I just came by to oversee the situation after the recent attack."
Although Y/N knew what Peggy meant, she was one of the medic staff that had been stitching up the aftermath of that attack after all. However, Steve on the other hand seemed to be lost.
Peggy further explained, "Schmidt sent out a force to Azzano, more than 200 men went up against him and less than 50 returned." She paused, "Your audience contained what's left of the 107th."
Steve's blues widen in realization that almost looked much like panic, "The 107th?"
"What?" Peggy prompt quickly.
Steve then turned his head to Y/N, "Bucky?" He questioned shortly.
But even she was hoping that he'll know something about Bucky, apparently she was wrong, "I tried to ask but I'm not authorized to enter the tent. I was hoping you heard from him."
Seeing the panic in Steve's eyes, she knew that her lover was no where near the safety that she prayed for. But before fear could set in, Steve sprinted out of the tent, "Come on!" he shouted as Y/N and Peggy ran closely behind him.
When they arrived to the tent, fortunately they had the permission to enter with the help of Peggy. "Well, if it isn't the Star-Spangled Man With A Plan. What is your plan today?" Colonel Philips greeted in a teasing manner.
Steve didn't even bother to greet the colonel as he demanded, "I need the casualty list from Azzano." In which the Philips responded, "You don't get to give me orders, son."
Knowing that arguments won't help the situation, he control his tone of voice and spoke, "I just need one name, Sergeant James Barnes from the 107th." He took a short breath and insisted, "Please tell me if he's alive, sir. B-A-R-"
Colonel Phillips stood on his feet as he walked towards a table behind him, "I can spell. I have signed more of these condolence letters today than I would care to count." He paused before turning around to eye on Steve and briefly on the very worried looking nurse next to him.
"But the name does sound familiar. I'm sorry." There was a flash of sincerity in his eyes when he looked towards Y/N.
The optimistic Steve continued to insist more about other possibilities than casualties, "What about the others? Are you planning a rescue mission?" They went back and forth about the what is the 'right' thing to do, "Yes, it's called 'winning the war'. "
And suddenly sound of the heavy rain fall was all Y/N could hear, then comes the booming of her heartbeat as the panic started to deprive her of any optimism, clouding her judgment to think of anything near to positive outcomes such as Steve.
It was getting harder to breath and the anxitey slowly choked her, forcing tears to pool in her eyes. Peggy swiftly took a hold on Y/N, before her knees managed to fall to the ground. The muffled sound of Peggy's voice managed to come through but not enough to wake her from the despair.
Before she knew it, Steve was already gone for an unauthorized rescue mission with the help from Peggy. And ever since, Y/N had spend every waking moment digging her knees into the uneven ground. Her elbows bruised from how hard she propped them on the steel edge of the army green cot. Her palms almost dented to shape of the silver cross as she desperately squeeze it between her hold.
She prayed and prayed for his return. For both of her dearest to be safe, to find their way home.
And for a moment Y/N thought her prayers were graciously granted by God, as the crowd was getter louder and the circle of soldiers were geting thicker when the survivors joined the rest of them. There were chantings of "Captain America" that echoed throughout the base and that gave her relief to know that Steve was safe.
But it was not enough to tame her anxiousness. Y/N's focus has never been sharper when her eyes scanned the crowd, she slithered her way between the jumping joy of the soldiers, grabbing onto some men who she mistook as Bucky until she saw him.
Her heartbeat ramped increasingly as she pushed through the soldiers, finding strength from the blood pumping excitement when she recognize those steel blues and that cheeky smile. Not long before she managed to grab onto his hand and pulled his attention to her.
It was brief but he knew that face anywhere; and suddenly his whole body was engulf into a familiar tight hug that he thought he could never be able to feel again. "James." her voice still stuttered even if it was just one word that came out of her lips.
"y/n?" Bucky called her name, almost in disbelief.
God, she never knew that she was able to miss his voice this much.
"Doll, what you doing here?" He gently lead her away, which she reluctantly followed, "I'm here for you." There was no need of lies now that Bucky was here in her arms.
His gaze soften with a mix of concern and joy, "What do you mean you're here for me?" Bucky couldn't help but to let out a short laugh, "Sweetheart, you do realized that you're in the middle of a war?" His brows quirked as he reminded.
Y/N rolled her eyes. Of course, she realized that. The moment she saw that form for enlistment, she knew. But, it didn't stop her to sign up, does it?
She laced her fingers into his, "I didn't come all the way here to fight with you, James." she whispered as she leaned closer, "So, please just shut up and kiss me."
Bucky might have just realized it now; what a stubborn, demanding, crazy little lover got himself. Though at the same time, she had never charmed him more.
Bucky sighed in defeat before running his tongue on his lower lip, "Well then, come here you little minx" he took her by the head and gave her the most desperate yet sweetest kiss she could never forget.
Brooklyn, 1944 – Promises, promises
It was the day that Steve, Bucky and the rest of the Howling Commandos were depolying to the Austrian Alps for one of the biggest mission since Captain's impulsive rescue mission in Italy last year.
Apparently, Zola was on the move and predicted to be passing though the location while travelling on a train.
This wasn't the first time she had sent Bucky away, but the fear of each always felt like it was her first; especially when she thought about the promise of death that's chained to a soldier's fate.
The closer the time of departure, the stronger her grip on Bucky's uniform becomes. And Bucky didn't need to say anything because he knows her too well; she won't take any of his sweet words as a cure for her distress.
Bucky slowly swayed her from side to side as their embrace tightens with need; her face hidden in the crook of his neck while his arms secured around her waist. He had to smile as it reminded him of their late night dance, barefoot on the kitchen floor of his apartment.
He could feel the teasing gaze coming from his back as well as the whistles of the Howling Commandos playfully making fun of him. Bucky was also well aware of the fact that everyone had made theirs bets on when will the Sargent James B. Barnes finally get down on his knees for his little nightingale of a nurse.
Unsurprisingly, Steve might just win the bet afterall. That punk just had know everything about him.
Y/N closer snuggled into him one last time, "Come home to me, James." She whispered against his skin before pulling away. Teary eyes threatened to spill its salty liquid as she looked up at him, "Promise me."
Bucky's charming smile lighten his features as he leaned to press a kiss in her forehead, "I promise."
Brooklyn, 1945 – Loved and lost
Months gone by, entered the new year, and it always felt like eternity for Y/N. She spent nights kneeling next to her bed and days on the church's floor; practically begging to God for the life of her lover, for keeping him away from death.
And the letters from Bucky also come and goes within those few months' time, with his promises of coming home that's laced in the words of his longing and love for her.
But, little did she knew, that promise met it's end of the bargain when the dreaded letter came to her hands. It came from the man she met back in Italy base, Colonel Phillips, sending the words of condolences for the death Sargent James B. Barnes during his honourable mission at the Austrian Alps.
But the first time she read to words, it didn't even register in her head. It was as if her brain failed to translate the message for her to understand. Y/N had been re-reading the same lines over and over and over until it finally clicked.
The usually bright eyes of hers were now slowly filled with tears, she was in the state of shock; that even if her brain knew exactly what had happened but her heart wasn't ready for it. 
The tears started to fall down onto the letter. Drip by drip. And all of the sudden she lost every word that she could ever think of. Her silent scream; suffocating her with each breath she took desperately gripping onto the fragile piece of paper, holding it to her chest hold as if that would help to ease the pain in her heart.
Y/N could feel it in her ripping guts. How all the threads of every joyful memories she could ever once recall; they  unraveled in a way that broke her to pieces until they were all but a rumpled of strings scattered about her feet.
A sharp fall had forced Y/N down to her knees, skin digging into the hard floor as her hands trembled silently, clutching onto the letter.
At first when she opened her mouth, there was not a single sound came out as her breath ripped from her lungs. Each left her with scars of loss and every waking minute in this reality was just pure pain.
Her body bend forward until her forehead meets the floor, that was when she wailed; an agonizing scream that left a haunting memory to the neighbours around her apartment.
She cried like there was too much raw pain inside that she could never contained. She cried like her soul needed to break loose from her skin, desperate to release a loathful rage on the world. 
But it was more than just crying, it was the sobbing of a woman that drained of all hope. She sank on floor, willing herself to be swallowed by the dread and loss. Just screaming out the agonies that been dancing across her vulnerable veins. 
Her chest violently quivered as she was desperately trying to catch the air. She collected every last energy that she had to call out the name of the lover she had loss, "James.." Her gasping breath whispered against the floor, "You promised." 
A month later the nation celebrate to the announcement to the end of a war, but to Y/N it was just another wave of mourning grief to a loss of another precious person in her life; Steve.
Amidst the loud sound of cheering and laughter, she rushed away from the crowd to the place that she had put all her faith into. Stumbling through the empty church and falling at the feet of Jesus' statue, Y/N looked up at the face if God with loath, rage, despair, and tears.
The night was brighten to the flashing light from the firework but all she could think of was how similar the sound of it to a firing canon in the war. And the thought of Bucky and Steve run through her mind.
She had been nothing but faithful to the lord, religiously prayed for no more than saving the life of people she held dear to her heart.
But, God thought it would be merciful to let them die.
Y/N harshly ripped the cross necklace from her neck, tearing her skin apart in the process. She gripped on the cross in her hands, much like she would few month back but for completely different reason.
The crimson of her blood tainted her white collar of her nurse uniform as she she cursed the all mighty God for what he had done. Ever since, she swore to herself to never be naive to the illusion of God's mercy ever again.
Washington D.C., 2014 – An old friend
Fate is full with irony and God has his way of twisting them for his own pleasure.
When Y/N died in the 60's, old and unmarried, even if she doesn't believe in God anymore, her dying wish was to be able to meet her lover and friend again.
At least one more time.
But lo and be hold, God had different plans for her. Y/N's body did die that night on the hospital bed but her soul never did. It was as if she was woken up from sleep in another body with the same face as her, that's when she realized she has been reincarnated.
Apparently, she was only born in the same family lineage as her original life; whether coming from her younger brother or cousin or anyone related back to her bloodline. And sharing even the tiniest amount of blood of her own, triggers every single memory from her previous life.
This wasn't what she wanted.
She didn't want to live knowing she cannot be with Bucky.
So on the 2nd life, she did the unthinkable. She took her own life, thinking that she would finally leave the world behind but she didn't.
It happened again.
And again.
And again.
So, when she reached her 6th life, she realized that she will never able to meet James and Steve ever again; that was when she went rogue.
Her 6th life was filled with rage and vengeance that she took the idea of life very lightly. So, instead of living until the old days, she searched for revenge and got herself tragically killed in the process.
Now, the 18 year old Y/N was in her 7th life, with a new name that was given by her 7th parents, "Evelyn" , and the spitting image of her 1st life. From her dark raven hair to the light brown of her eyes. This time, she decided to try to accept the cruel fate; the cursed that God had placed on her for the sin that she made decades ago.
Y/N walked around the Smithsomian Museum, specifically at the American history section where they put up Captain America's exhibit. It's been how many lifetimes since she surround herself with knowledge of a past that she once lived.
This was the first time, since her first life. And most probably the last time since she was going overseas in a week to continue her studies in Asia.
She walked along the line up display of the Howling Commandos suits, remembering the living flesh of them as she took steps forward to each, stopping in front of Bucky's.
Flashes of him appeared to where the figure stood; the memories was so vivid that she could still feel fabric of his suit against her, the electrifying feeling on his skin on her own.
She ripped her gaze away just to be greeted by the portrait of Bucky, plastered so hugely on the memorial of one of the Howling Commandos section. Despite the cracking of her heart, her body move on its own; as they knew that deep down, Y/N's heart will always be yearning for her lover.
Her gaze soften with longing and nostalgic as she slowly blink at his features. His considerably messy hair, that little frown that he does to act mysterious for the ladies, and the thin layer of beard that she loved to leave her lipstick marks on.
Y/N's daydream were cut short when someone pulled her by the arm, startling her into a defensive mode. Her 6th life's habit almost broke through when she nearly flipped the man on the floor but thankfully she stopped herself as she recognized those blue eyes.
The man's face looked pale like he had seen a ghost, as he uttered a name that she haven't heard for decades, "y/n?"
"Steve..." she called his name wordlessly.
She knew he was alive. Everybody does, when the news came out in 2011, she was merely a 15 year old kid back then. Apparently, the super soldier serum helped him to survive the ice.
She remembered how her parents rushed to her room when they heard the sudden cluttering sounds of panic upstairs, only to find their daughter on the floor looking pale while her cup of iced coffee spilling in all over her study desk as the viral youtube video of Captain America running through New York city barefoot.
She remembered the feeling of both disbelief and joy that rushed through body as her parents helped her to sit up on her bed. The moment that it sunk into her head, she began to cry. Streams of joyful tears broke from her shaky body, each drop washed the painful burden in her heart as her parents lulled her to sleep.
Y/N never made an effort to meet him after knowing truth because who would've believe her words?
She wasn't Steve. There wasn't any super soldier serum in her blood. There wasn't any tank of chemical that drown her with power.
She was cursed and now she had to live with it.
Meanwhile, Steve seemed to be trapped in a spiralling confusion of his own. He examined each of her features and he had not a single doubt that she has the same face to an old friend in the 40's.
The same friend that he knew died of old age in the 60's.
But, how come the person managed to have the exact same face to hers. Now that he looked closer, she was younger than the last time he saw Y/N. She looked like she was in her teens, "Are you really y/n?" His voice was soft as he muttered.
Y/N bit the insides of her cheeks, holding back the urge of telling him the truth, "Sorry, I think you got the wrong person." she tried to untangle his grasp around the thin of her arm.
Even her voice was similar to Y/N, and she was looking at Bucky's photo like she knew him.
How could she say that she's was not Y/N?
Steve reluctantly let go of her arms and took a step away after seeing the distress on her face, "I-I'm sorry. You remind me of someone I know." He couldn't take his eyes off her.
She was just too similar looking to someone precious that he left behind.
"It's okay, sir." She smiled gently, like the way she usually does when Steve apologizes for his impulsiveness of picking a fight in alleyways. She looked up to the taller man as she continued, "Thank you for being alive..." she hesitated to call him by his name so instead she called for his other name, "...Captain."
She thanked him sincerely before walking away, leaving Steve to reminisce the memories of his life with Y/N and Bucky as he stared at Bucky's memorial.
The next week, she left the United States for Asia where she planned to spend 4 years studying at the National University of Singapore, leaving her past behind in hopes of moving forward with her life, refusing to care about the avengers shenanigans anymore, including her dear friend, Steve.
New York, 2018 – New norms
When half of the population was wiped out from the earth, two of them was Y/N's parents. And like every other people who had lost their loved ones during the blip, her parents sudden absence truly take a toll on her, especially when she was planning to live a long life with them.
After graduating and getting a decent job in Singapore, she was forced to go back to New York when it happened. Y/N couldn't just let her childhood house left abandoned, she simply can't let that happen.
You would thought a person who had multiple lifetimes would be used to losing someone they love but no. It only gets worst as the years go by.
The more Y/N tried to fit into the new norms, the more that she could feel herself slipping into old habits of her 6th life.
Until that one drunken night when she visited the Smithsomian Museum again after years of forcing herself to forget about him; it took her one look at the potrait of Bucky, she knew what she had to do.
Germany, 2023 – An old nemesis
Nearly 5 years into the blip and Y/N was already becoming a legend in the underground scene. They called her the Deathstalker. She never really knew the origin of it but nevertheless she chooses to stick with the newly founded identity.
With the skills she picked up on her 6th life, she easily became the most deadly assassin in the business, seemingly in a constant competition of reputation with the highly popular, black widow assassins.
Though she couldn't care less about who was winning the battle, she only cares about tracking anything or anyone related to Hydra.
After that fateful night at the museum, she couldn't to think that this must be her calling.
If the curse made her technically immortal, then why not became the hunter destined to slay the monster. They said that Hydra will never die, but so was she. And if anything good came out from this curse, then she might as well use it to avenge Bucky.
And bring the old nemesis to the ground.
Her 6th life was similar to this but she wasn't going to make the same mistake. The flaming greed to have her revenge was too strong back then, it lead her to be hasty and clumsy, which then let her to an early death.
But, she's grown out of those immaturity.
Nowadays, she takes her time and still get the job done flawlessly. Just like she is now, when the soft but dark sound of her chuckle, interrupted the silence that had claimed the room.
The poor man was sitting limp on the chair with his body tied with it. He had been like this for seemingly hours with a knife in one of his thighs, which trembled with the vibrations of his body.
More so, when Y/N twisted them, causing a keen of pain to clawed up his throat and spilled out a hoarse groan.
"Where is it?" Her fingers wrapped around the handle, as she watched the man tossed his head, more with fear than trying to answer.
"I don't like to repeat myself." Y/N slid the blade free, causing a noise he would not forget. The man sagged against his bonds, panting as he watched the blood surged and dribbled out of the wound.
But then he felt the prick against his other leg, wide eyes turning to watch as the knife was held above his skin, Y/N's hand flat against the top, ready to push in. "Where the fuck is it?" her tone was eerie as the voice changer in her mask produced an emotionless robotic effect on it.
"I don't know what you're talking about." The thick german accent seethed through his voice as he grunted in pain.
There was only boredom in Y/N's eyes as she gazes straight into his. A stab of the knife went through his thigh without a warning, until the tip of it almost met the flat surface of the chair beneath it.
The whole room echoed with the sound of the whimpering and cries of his struggle, "Please, I swear to God I don't know what you're talking about." He pleaded as fast as he can, when he felt the shortage of breaths in his lungs due to dealing with the excruciating pain.
"Playing dumb isn't going to help you, mutt." She twisted the knife, pulled out and stabbed it again causing him to fall into an almost delirious state, "Please, please please, I swear I don't know anything about the serum." He blurted out of misery.
There it was.
The thing she wanted to hear.
Y/N's eyebrow quirked in interest, "I never mentioned the serum in our conversation, no?"
He fucked up.
He knew that he fucked up.
But, does it matter when his body was searing in pain?
By the end of the intense interrogation, Y/N finally got the intel she needed to find and destroy whatever was left behind by Wilfred Nagel, who was recruited by the CIA to recreate the super soldier serum.
Those greedy fuckers just cannot stay away from things that shouldn't be meddled with. Even Y/N could see the potential threats of a successful recreation the super soldier serum; they were practically asking for Hydra to revive to its glory days.
And she would not allow that to happen.
She needed to destroy it before its finished.
A loud wail left the man's lips, almost sounded a little strained as he had been screaming in pain for hours. Y/N mercilessly grabbed him by his sweaty chin as she pried his mouth open. Knowing exactly what was coming, the man begged, "Oh lord, please please help me please."
Leaning closer she coldly spoke, "The gods doesn't care about you. Trust me I've been there." With a swift strike, she forced her knife down his throat, and a splash of red tainted her mask, nearly got into her eyes but she managed to blink before it does.
She stood still as she watched him gurgle on his own blood as death collected his soul. Wiping the blood away from her eyelid, she walked out of the abandoned building with a mission to finish; all the while blissfully oblivious to the war that the avengers were fighting to their death on the other side of the world.
Madripoor, 2024 – The most prized asset
The returned of her parents were as sudden as the lost. Though she was glad that they were back, however she had to live a double life now that they kept asking about her job and personal life as they wanted to catch up for the lost of time in 5 years.
Y/N felt bad for lying to her parents but it was for their own good. Now, that she had sent them to a honeymoon to travel all over Europe, she felt better in pursuing her mission without concerns.
Besides the joyful return there was also the awful ones.
Now, that Wilfred Nagel was back from the blip. The serum was perfected to its finest version. And was stolen by bunch of kids protesting for equal rights.
What a fucking mess that was.
But, she would deal with that later. The main focus right now was to find the man itself. There would be no more serums if the source is eradicated.
That was her priority.
With her face hidden behind her signature mask, Y/N walked through the messy crowd as she searches for Shelby's men. This should be a short meeting, since Shelby and her had history together; or more to a favour that she owns to Y/N.
However, when she tried to tune in into the hushed conversations in the crowd, she noticed that the murmurs seemed to be divided into two hot topics; one about the sudden appreance of the Deathstalker, which was herself, and second was surprisingly about the return of another notorious assassin. 
Then when the conversations died down, a fight suddenly broke out. Y/N hold on the handle of her blades from the side of her thighs, as she stiffed into a defensive mode.
While on the other hand, the crowd seemed to be more interested in recording the fight, than avoiding it.
She seemlessly weaved her way through the people, only to see that the action ended with a man choked onto the table of bar. The attacker's face turned away from her where she could only see his figure from the back.
Then, a gleam of gold caught her attention, Y/N squinted her eyes as she analyzed the man's left arm.
It was not the pattern of the sleeve from his suit.
It was his arm.
A black bionic arm.
Which reminded of her of someone she came across in her 6th life; but his was a tin foil silver with a red star on his upper arm. At the time, he was Hydra's most prized asset, they called him the Winter Soldier.
Part II >>
Read my other works here: Masterlist
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A/N: yes, I am well aware that left y'all hanging but I still hope you enjoy this one. Tell me what you think so far, I'm curious if y'all cry at the part where she received the letter or maybe you can comment of something else, I'd still love to hear them ♡
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buckyalpine · 2 years
Note
always you’s angst only ending … feed us a tiny lil drabble of maybe bucky not stopping until he and bruce and maybe even shuri (cause bby’s the smartest) find a way to bring her back?
like he enters the portal, scoops up her body, and kisses her back to life. then throws her over his shoulder, locks her in his bedroom, and makes love to her for like a week straight.
“she’s barely been back for a month- AND SHE’S ALREADY PREGNANT?!”
- ur local angst slut who’s actually hella sensitive and cannot handle this shit, gossip girl 💋
Always you angst alternative ending 
18+
Okay YES, if your a pure angst fiend, you may ignore this but I'm here to mend hearts from the sadness that was this fic.
Warnings: Angst, FLUFFFFFFF, Smuuuttttt, happy ending 
5 years later
Bucky refused to accept you being gone. He tried to heal, going to therapy, grief counselling, medication, writing letters, everything under the fucking sun to help him come to terms with the fact that he’d never see you again. 
It was impossible.
It ate him alive.
He was physically stronger, pouring all his time into the gym to find a way to numb the pain but he was more mentally fucked than ever.
It had been 5 years, nearly 6 and the raw pain he felt was still fresh. Every night, he'd wake up searching for you. He couldn't let go, holding onto the pieces you had left behind. He wrote to you as often as he could, keeping a locked diary of things he wanted to tell you, letters he knew no one would see but what else could he do when he wanted to talk to you so badly but you weren’t there. 
That didn’t stop him from finding a way to pour his heart and soul somewhere. 
_________________________________
Happy Birthday babygirl,  I wish I could wake you up with kisses today, tell you how special the world is with you in it, make you pancakes, feed you in bed because I know you’ll cuddle up in the sheets until noon. Buy you a pretty dress, take you out, maybe even go dancing, even if its just me and you and Steve’s playlist of songs from the 40′s. I’d hold you close to me all night until your feet were sore or until Tony told us to turn the cheesy music off. 
I know he secretly ships us (Peter taught me that word) 
If it were up to Stark, he’d throw you the biggest birthday party ever; that wouldn’t stop me from trying to sneak you away for some more birthday kisses. birthday cuddles. Birthday sex...is a new song Sam introduced me to. 
I wanted to do so much with you today sweet girl. Show you how much I love you on your special day. I should have shown you before it was too late. I regret it every single day. I’d give anything for just another day, just so you’d know. 
It was always you. 
Steve brought you some flowers today, Sam brought some balloons. I hope you see them from wherever you are. It’s not the same without you here angel.
We miss you baby. 
I miss you. 
Till we meet again,  JBB 
_________________________________
Hi Baby, I know it’s not a special occasion, I have no real reason to write today. I missed you though. I wanted to tell you about how I jumped out of a plane today and all I could think of is how much you would have laughed because I didn’t use a parachute. You’re laugh is the sweetest sound in the world and I’d give anything to hear it just one more time.
Sam recorded it all, you would have been the first person he showed the footage to. I’d probably ignore you both and then you’d probably tease me about being grumpy and I’d want a kiss to feel better. And a hug. Maybe some cuddles. Please? 
Also you’d be proud of me today, Red Wing broke and it wasn’t my fault. Promise. I even apologized to Sam after but he doesn’t think I’m being sincere. And I’m not because red wing is a little shit. So is Sam. 
I miss you sweets. I wish you were here. It hurts. Everything hurts. 
I hope we meet again. I’ll never let you go. 
Yours, JBB
_________________________________
My y/n,
I’m sorry. I should have told you. I regret it everyday. I’ll never stop trying to find a way to get you back. 
I love you,
JBB
_________________________________
It’s been almost 6 years. It still hurts.
Till we meet again, JBB
_________________________________
I can’t anymore. I need you back. 
JBB
_________________________________
There were some days where Bucky was able to focus, writing as much as he could, spilling all of his feelings onto the paper, a tiny part of him hoping that one day he’d be able to give you all his letters so you’d know you were all he could think of. 
Then there were the days where sobs tore through his body, his breathing labored, only managing to scribble three words before crumbling into a dark abyss. Bucky wracked his brain every single day; if you were able to go back once, there had to be a way to get you back again. Bruce and Tony had spent countless hours in the lab trying to find a way to reopen the portal but nothing led to you. 
*****
Bucky stared at his burner, pressing call and ending it before it could go through multiple times before finally letting it ring. There was only one other person he could turn to. He knew he wasn’t going to be immediately welcomed back into Wakanda but this wasn’t just about him. Everyone wanted you back. Nothing was the same without you there. If there was a 1% chance to get you back, he had to try. His chest felt tight as the jet landed in a secluded area having arranged a private meeting with Shuri, the one person he trusted with his life. 
"I-I have a favor to ask" Bucky's eyes were already pleading with her, his heart racing as he approached her, ready to fall on his knees. 
"Anything Sergeant Barnes" Shuri smiled, sensing he was there for something urgent, nodding for him to continue. There was zero hesitation as she immediately agreed to come back with him to try and get you back, bringing her own lab equipment with her so she could work with Bruce. After filtering through a number of timelines and timestamps, she’d managed to pinpoint the portal to find you but it wasn’t without its consequences. 
“You understand you may not return” Shuri whispered as Bucky threw on his tactical gear, insisting on getting you all on his own while rest of the team watched in pin drop silence, reluctantly letting him go alone “And y/n...we can get her back but there's a chance she may not...” 
She squeezed his hand before he stepped onto the platform, not wanting to finish the sentence but he already understood. He knew it was possible he’d find you again but it didn’t mean he’d find you alive. 
“Then at least I get to say goodbye” He gave her a strained smile; he had to bring you home one way or another. If this was how he had to go, he would run happily to his death; he’d be at peace knowing he died trying to find you. With the push of a button, he was instantly thrown into a warp, transported to where you had last been with Nat. Everything came to a halt as he found himself at an abandoned hydra base, the cold nipping his skin. Bucky blinked, his vision focusing on the fuzzy figure laying on the ground, his feet moving before he could process anything. 
There was no one else around. 
It was you. 
His doll. 
His y/n.
He sprinted to you, tears clouding his vision as he approached you, dropping to his knees, both fear and hope fighting for dominance. He found you. You were there. But would he ever actually get you back? Were you even breathing? 
“Y/n?” Bucky cradled you to him, scooping you in his arms and chasing the portal that had already began to close. He held your face to his neck, his metal hand protecting your head, holding you securely against his body as you both fleshed back to the present. 
The team gasped as he appeared on the platform again with you safely tucked in his arms. They didn’t dare move, everyone holding their breaths while Bucky laid you down with you still in his arms, his hand softly stroking your cheek. 
“Y/n? Doll?” His heart was beating erratically, your skin was warm, a glimmer of hope burning stronger as he gently shook you, pressing his cool metal hand against your face. “Please” 
“C’mon doll, come back to me baby, I have so much I need to tell you” He pleaded, his warm breath fanning against your face, tears brimming his eyes. Tony and Steve itched to whisk you off to the medbay while Sam silently shook his head, wanting to give Bucky an extra minute, hoping you’d be able to wake up in the super soldiers arms where you belonged. 
“Baby, wake up sweets” Bucky couldn't help himself, pressing his lips softly to your forehead, trailing feather light kisses down your face while cuddling you. “C’mon I l-love you” His voice cracked, his lips finally pressing against yours. They were still soft, warm, you had to wake up, you had to-
Your lips stirred, your eyes cracking open, taking your first breath as your eyes focused on Bucky. 
“Sweetheart?” Bucky's eyes grew wide, unsure if he was dreaming or not, scrambling to hug you closer, cupping your face gently.  
“Bucky?” Your voice was a raspy whisper, leaning into his touch, feeling his tears fall onto your skin as he pulled you into his chest. 
“My doll” He let out a soft sob, cradling your head as you buried your face into his neck, moved to cling onto him, the last thing you remembered was darkness and now you were in his arms again surrounded by his warmth, his scent. Everyone stayed rooted in place, tears falling freely, dying to grab you, hug you, hold you again but they were not about to separate the two of you, not after how badly Bucky had yearned to get you back. 
“Bucky” You wept, your mind still piecing together how you were back but it didn’t matter, not when he was holding you again. 
“Hi baby” He whispered against your hair, wiping your tears with his thumb, cupping your face, kissing you all over before capturing your lips again, relishing in your touch, feeling your fingers card through his short locks. You lost yourselves in each other, the rest of the world no longer existing. 
“Okay white wolf, When do we get to say hi to our girl” Sam snorted, sniffling seeing you tucked in Bucky’s arms, the brunettes lips curved into a smile for the first time since you’d been gone. Bucky loosened his hold around you, helping you to your feet, giving you one more kiss before letting go. 
“Come here” Steve scooped you up immediately after, struggling not to squeeze you tight, “We missed you sweet heart, so much”
“Hasn’t been the same without you” Sam gave you a once over, determining you were well enough for a slightly bone crushing hug before having you grabbed away by Tony. Tony wasn’t able to say much, biting his bottom lip to keep it from trembling, hugging you the longest, reluctant to let you go. You were engulfed in Nat’s arms as she wept, squeezing you like her life depended on it. 
“You saved me” She whispered in your hair, her tears falling onto your skin, “Don’t ever do that again” She hissed sternly, grabbing your face to look at her, “Don’t ever ever do something like that again” 
“Give me my baby back” Bucky grabbed you, tossing you over his shoulder as soon as everyone had gotten their hugs and kisses, not interested in giving anyone a second longer when he needed you so badly. You squealed, giggling as he carried you straight down the hall towards his room without glancing back. As soon as he locked the door, his hands were all over you, holding you tightly to him. 
“Your baby?” You shyly whispered as he rested his forehead against yours, nodding and chasing your lips. 
“M’never letting you go again doll, never” He trailed kisses down your neck while unbuckling the straps of your gear letting it drop to the floor. “I want to love you, I want to hold you, I want to make love to you, I want it all with you” 
Bucky tore your clothes off, hoisting you up to wrap your legs around his waist as he carried you over to the bathroom, turning the hot water on, hot water pouring over both if you. The steam made you woozy, your body turning into jelly under his touch as he massaged your muscles with delicate touches, his lips ghosting over every bruise and scar that had marked your skin. You let out a needy whimper, staying close to him, your butterflies erupting in your tummy every time he touched you. 
“Bucky please”
“I want to love you so badly baby, love you the way you deserve” Bucky willed himself not to take you right there, focused on rinsing off and grabbing a towel, carrying you over to his bed. He tossed to towel off, climbing on top of you, neither of you having the patience for a slow build or teasing. Your belly clenched feeling his hard length rut and rub against your bare cunt, your slick coating his cock. 
“I need you” He rasped while you whined, wrapping your legs around him, bucking your hips up. “You have no idea baby, God I need you” His eyes were pleading with you, his cock starting to leak feeling your arousal. 
“Wanna feel you Bucky” You spread your legs for him, your breath hitching feeling the tip of his cock rub through your folds before pressing into your entrance. 
“Gonna make love to you so good sweet girl” Bucky whispered as he started to push his cock in, his heart beating faster, cock growing harder feeling your heat pull him in deeper. He groaned, letting his body weight fall onto you as he started to thrust, pleasure consuming both of you immediately. 
“JAmessss” Your gasp melted into a moan, your head pressed against his pillow as he filled you, stretching you open, letting you feel every ridge and vein of his cock. “Stretching me to so good Buckyyy” 
“Yeah? You feel so good wrapped around me baby” He rasped, his orgasm already creeping down his spine as he pressed sloppy kisses all over your face, overwhelmed with emotion and the feeling of you under him. Your moans made him twitch, nearly growling when he felt your nails dig into his skin as he kissed your cervix with each roll of his hips. 
“I missed you so much baby, didn’t know what to do with myself, I-I couldn’t breathe without you, couldn’t live-” Bucky could feel tears brimming his eyes, struggling to keep them away, “Fuck I missed you so much, I felt like I was drowning every single day” 
You sniffled over his words, your heart connected with his, squeezing your thighs around his waist, desperate to keep every inch of his body pressed with yours. 
“It-it was always you” He kissed your forehead, as he kept you caged under him, moaning against your skin.
“I love you” you cupped his cheeks, brushing his tears away, his nose lightly bumping against yours. You pulled him down for a sweet kiss, only pulling away for air. All of it was so much all at once, the quietest cries and softest kisses, feeling every inch of each other, making up for lost time. Bucky pulled the covers over you both, wrapping you in a cocoon of warmth, hiding you from the rest of the world, savoring this moment with just the two of you, his sweet girl back in his arms again. 
He let his arms roam across your body, stroking your waist, your thighs, gently cupping your breasts, softly suckling your nipples, his body trembling as he tried to hold his climax off and make this moment last forever. 
“M’gonna marry you, you know that?” His hands came to lace with yours, pinning you against the bed, eyes locked with yours. His pace didn’t falter, thrusting into you, loving the way your pussy fluttered around his cock, rolling his hips so he could push into you deeper. “W-will you? Will you marry me babygirl” 
He knew you had just come back but he wanted nothing more, unable to stop the words from slipping out. You let your own tears fall down your cheeks, pulling him impossibly closer. 
“Yes” You whimpered, sniffling back sobs as he stroked your head, smiling against your lips. 
“Gonna make you my wife baby, marry you and take care of you until my last breath” He started to fuck you faster, panting, the muscles in his body tensing. 
“Tell me more Bucky, please?” You whined, your heart aching for more, everything you’d always wanted with the one person you’d always been in love with. 
“Oh baby, M’gonna get you pregnant sweet girl, have a family with you, everything with you, take care of your swollen belly, make love to you even when you’re full of me, show you how much I adore you princess” You gasped as he braced himself, his grunts growing louder, his body heat radiating off him, unable to stop the pleasure that was growing. 
“Tell me your mine baby” He whined, wrapping his arms around you while you threw your head back, your eyes rolling back at the feel of his pubic bone rubbing your sensitive bundle of nerves with each thrust. 
“I’m yours Bucky” 
“Fuck don’t stop y/n, please, I need it” His voice was needy, desperately clinging onto your body, craving to hear nothing else. “Say it again doll”
“I’m yours Bucky, all yours soldier” You moaned louder, your legs shaking around him “I’m gonna cum” 
“Cum with me baby, same time, please” 
“BuckyBuckyBucky- You cried our, your walls staring to flutter, ready to fall off the edge with hi. 
“M’right here, I got you, togther, c’mon, cum with me princess” Bucky rolled his hips, pounding you into the mattress, biting down onto your neck as he felt your nails scratch down his back while white hot pleasure tore through you, your pussy milking his cock. 
“FUCK JAMES” Your body trembled as he fucked you through your high, burying his face into your neck, his lips brushing by your ear. 
“YES, Yes baby, my good girl, my sweet girl, s’perfect for me, yes, I’m gonna give you my cum, get you pregnant, have a baby with you, take care of you, love you, all of it with you baby, fuck- I LOVE YOU- UGGHHH- 
Bucky collapse on you, filling you with his cum until the bed was damp, his body jolting from sensitivity each time you fluttered around him while kissing his temple. He hardly moved, a steady stream of cum still pouring into you, staying connected to you the entire night, cuddling you next to him. 
“I finally have my baby back, my sweet sweet baby, she’s back” 
It has been nearly a week since you were back but you hadn’t left Bucky’s room once. You only took a few moments to eat and sleep, the rest of the time wrapped up in each other, connected in the most intimate way possible, while whispering sweet nothings, 
It was everything Bucky needed. Emotional. Warm. Soft. Loving. 
He couldn’t help the tears every time he was inside you, he finally had you back, wrapping his arms around you every time you made love, making sure you knew exactly how much he had always adored you. As much as he wanted to take you apart in every way imaginable, he couldn’t help but slip into missionary every single time, wanting to see your pretty face, feel your body, have your legs wrap around him as he came inside you. 
*****
You threw on your coat while Bucky slipped his arm around your waist while you both made your way down, passing through the living room on our way out. 
“Damn future Mrs. Barnes” Sam whistled, along with the rest of the team, everyone gathered for a night for a movie. “Where you off to?” 
“The three of us are going out for dinner” Bucky smiled with a child like grin, snickering to himself while the team looked at you with confusion. 
“Three?” Steve cocked his head, noting the way you shied into Bucky’s chest, giggling while he kissed your head, his hand slipping down to brush over your belly. “THREE?”
Steve’s eyes grew wide as he shot out of his seat, pointing at your tummy. “THREE” He whipped his head to Tony, Nat, Sam and Clint who slowly connected the dots. “THREE” 
“For fucks sake, it hasn’t even been a month Barnes” Tony snorted, while everyone pilled onto you both, a large mess of hugs and tears. 
“You didn’t waste any time, huh” Sam wiggling his eyebrows while Bucky wrapped his arms around you, his hands splayed on your tummy. 
“Never again” He whispered, tilting your chin to kiss you deeply, “Never ever again” 
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twstreverie · 2 years
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sun and moon — 🌙 ☀️
sun/moon like s/o (kalim, jamil, rook, malleus) 🫶🏼
this idea kinda just happened, also because “o sol e a lua” is stuck in my head… I might do others with this <3
requests are open!
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kalim al-asim
he adores you, to simply put it. he doesn’t mind one bit that you have more of an introverted nature — he balances that out. even if you don’t have the energy to go to one of his dorms feasts and parties he wouldn’t care. kalim is content with just you and him if that’s what you really wanted. he’ll take you on a carpet ride any night!
it’s a little funny to watch, but he’s sometimes you’re voice — since you’re quieter or don’t speak up and talk loud as much. you’ll hear him at least once or twice a day being like “oh they said—!”
the victories and celebrations that go off in his mind during the earlier parts of your relationship like when you started to laugh loudly around him or even when he hears you excitedly sharing something you like to him. he loves it all!
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jamil viper
he hates to admit it but you sometimes make him feel so flustered and overwhelmed (in the best way) when it comes to your loud boasting of how much you love him or that instant “hey!!!” he hears the moment you see him. he has to pull down his hood a little sometimes jamil cant fight the warmth spreading on his cheeks. he’ll sigh and try telling you there’s no need for the energy (right in the middle of the school hallways ahaha) but does he actually want you to stop?
jamil tends to just let you ramble a lot, he’s a silent listener, giving once in a while a thought or two. not that he’s ignoring you he just doesn’t have the energy to talk sometimes — he’s content just doing work or even cooking and just listening to you go on.
has caught multiple times both overhearing and being told by others of your praise and talking highly of him — jamil was caught totally off guard when he had heard the first time. however by this point he isn’t surprised at all. I would be lying though if I said there wasn’t a smug grin after hearing.
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rook hunt
rook is obsessed with you. sorry but he will be telling you an earful of his swooning and how much he is simply enamored by you. though you have no magic he claims that you’ve bewitched him.
I can just imagine you could just be sitting there reading and eating something during lunch silently. you could be doing basically nothing and look over and see rook with his head on his hand looking at you with heart eyes.
though he does most of the talking at times, he doesn’t mind. but I have to say at first it might’ve been a bit overwhelming with his nature for someone like you. at the same time, he can be very quiet when he wants to be, so you get both haha. he’ll even do stuff like write you letters and poetry (they’ve gotten pretty long), flowers, and from what I believe he is artistic you better believe he paints and draws you. you’re his muse.
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malleus draconia
he utterly loves your affection, though he was initially surprised by your boldness but he could only lightly chuckle at you and your behavior. he indulges it anyway, he wants you to do this stuff. sebek definitely had a hard time having to deal with seeing you happily hug and kiss him whenever — even touching his horns! (he could’ve passed OUT)
not gonna lie malleus wants your attention and stuff anyway so like this is perfect for him — that both before your relationship and now that you’re so eager to be with him and such. because trust me, you’re his first and only, he just wants to spend his time with you. he is simply content basking in it, obviously.
he kinda just lets you drag him wherever and do what you want, he’ll follow you. but he would love something more quiet at times to, like during your nightly strolls when he sees you trying to follow and see some pretty creature or even small fairies you see time to time.
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oneofthetorturedpoets · 6 months
Note
Can you write a Melissa Schemmenti x reader, which Melissa writes like secret like cute notes to us but like we don't know it's from her and it being like all fluff and stuff please also maneater was sooooo good ❤️😭
melissa schemmenti x reader
(not proofread please ignore any errors 😭)
old fashioned lover.
“i just wish some things were still old fashioned, everything’s online now” you comment as you open the break room fridge “like buy me flowers, write me letters, something real” Janine nods along.
little do you know, melissa is taking mental notes of everything you say.
-
the first note you got, you thought it was from a student.
you walk into your class room, seeing a folded white sheet of paper on your desk. you opened the little note up.
'you are an amazing teacher, when you first came to abbott, I could tell you were going to make this place better than it has ever been'
you slide the paper into your drawer, smiling at the kind words.
-
the second note made you assume you had a secret admirer. there was a bouquet of beautiful flowers with the note inside.
'your smile lights up any room you walk into. just seeing you makes my day'
you grab the flowers, bringing them up to your nose to smell them. Barbara walks up to the door.
"you got yourself a special someone?" she asks, knowing very well who sent them.
you turn around, smiling. "yes, apparently. but I have no idea who it is, they aren't giving me anything to go off of"
she smirks. "don't worry, time will tell" her words only confusing you more.
-
the third note gave you a little hint at who it was.
'the night when we all went to the bar after the last school year ended is forever burned into my mind. your hair was perfectly curled, the outfit you wore bringing out your eyes. every time you looked over at me, my heart jumped out of my chest. it's impossible to not fall in love with you.'
you remember that night, you and the entire abbott crew went out for drinks after completing yet another school year. your secret admirer is between Jacob, Ava, Barbara, Melissa, Gregory, and Janine. there is no way its any of them, Jacob is gay, Ava and Janine are straight, Barbara is married, Melissa is messing around with that firefighter, and Gregory is still in love with Janine.
who the hell is it?
-
the fourth note made you even more confused.
'I've tried to move on from you, I even got into a serious relationship thinking if I tried to ignore my feelings for you, they would go away. I was so wrong. I felt like a shitty person because I kept comparing them to you. I learned then that no one can compare to you.'
in the break room, you're showing Janine the note. "it has to be someone in our group." she says, you nod. "could it be Melissa? she has been the only one who was in a serious relationship and broke it off?"
you laugh. "no way, she wouldn't feel that way about me. plus she has that one guy. bob? rob? I don't know, I just know she is way out of my league... I wish though, you know how long i've liked her" Janine shrugs.
Melissa, who is right outside the door, heard everything. you liked her back?
-
it's 8pm on friday, you're on your couch in your pajamas, watching your latest obsession when there is a bunch of loud persistent knocks on your door. "Jesus! I'm coming!"
you get up, running to your door. you open it, revealing an out of breath Melissa. "Melissa? are you okay?" she nods, trying to catch her breath.
"i'm sorry, I just need to get this out. I heard what you said in the break room about your feelings for me-" you cut her off.
"shit. I didn't mean for-"
"don't. let me get this out, y/n. I've been writing those notes for you. I wasn't sure what I was going to do if you found out it was me, I just wanted to make sure you knew there was someone out there who loved you. I never thought you would feel the same about me. Ever since I laid eyes on you, I've loved you." your eyes go wide. not sure what to say, you pull her into you. looking into her eyes for permission. she gives you a little nod. you gently press into her, her lips soft against your.
you pull away. "what about your firefighter guy? weren't you seeing him?"
she shakes her head. "it was one night, just for fun and I hated every second of it." she pulls you in again.
-
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minustwofingers · 2 years
Text
exoplanet p.3
pairing: ellie williams x fem! reader (ur a girly girl in this one!!) (she/her pronouns)
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summary: you’ve won the life lottery as one of the few people on earth with parents who gained admittance to the most prestigous safezone in the world after the outbreak. but after a lab accident sends you out to jackson, wyoming, real life hits you fast. it’s a good thing that a hot lesbian finds u. (lol). mean ellie at first, slowburn, enemies to friends to lovers, fem reader asf
warnings: (PLEASE READ!) explicit language, violence, description of a medical procedure sans anesthesia, recreational drug use (idk how else to put it ellie gets absolutely zonked in the beginning), reader overthinks asf and is a little neurotic but that's why we love her x
a/n: hey guys! thank you so much for the wait! it's been genuinely insane how sweet and incredible all of you are. i've never felt so appreciated for my writing!! also, some notes: this chapter is heavily inspired by my last relationship. sorry if it's not as immersive bc of it! and also i don't have ANY medical knowledge so...cast a blind eye when u get to that scene
part 1
part 2
tags: @prettyplant0 @666findgod​ @sawaagyapong​ @rystarkov​ @buzzybuzzsposts @addisonnie @galacticstxrdust @parkersmyth @pinkazelma
wc: 6.6k
enjoy x
“One more time.”
You gave Ellie a withering look from where you were sitting at the end of her bed.
“Please,” she said, drawing out the s. “Just once more. I promise.” 
“Fine.” You rolled your eyes—a habit of hers that you were quickly picking up—and took in a deep breath. “Fuck.” 
Ellie lost it, peals of laughter bouncing off the walls. “Another one. Say something else.”
“I don’t understand why you think this is so funny,” you said.
“You say it so weird.”
“I enunciate,” you clarified. “I don’t ‘sound weird’. It’s called pronouncing every letter in the word and not having a lazy mouth.” 
“Please,” she gasped. “At least say bitch. You haven’t said that one yet.”
You looked her dead in the eye. “Bitch.”
If you weren’t already certain that Ellie was high out of her mind by the smell of her room and the general haze in the air, the way she howled with laughter and fell back on her bed would’ve made you entirely positive.
This was new. You’d begun to hang out with her in her room after dinner—that was normal—but when she’d knocked on your door smelling heavily of weed once you’d said goodnight to Joel, you were nothing less than shocked. Of course, she had none left for you. Which was probably good, because only a sober mind could navigate a night sitting on Ellie’s bed without doing something really, really stupid. 
“I can’t believe you call me weird,” you said, tucking your feet under her and giving her a pointed look. 
“You’re so lucky you didn’t grow up where I did,” Ellie said, wiping a tear away from her cheek as she tried (unsuccessfully) to rein in her giggles. “You would’ve been eaten alive, good lord.”
“What were you like as a kid?” you asked, resting your chin on your knees. 
She considered for a moment, growing more somber. “Um…I don’t know if you would’ve liked me very much.”
“What do you mean? Of course I would’ve liked you.” 
“No,” she said, swiping at her face so she pushed a strand of hair away. “I don’t think you would have.”
“Why not?”
“I was…” She paused, picking at her cuticles. “Back then I didn’t have anyone. I was an orphan, you know. My parents were never in the picture, so I was the only one I could count on.  I was really rough around the edges and could be nasty. But I probably would’ve ignored you like I did everyone else. “
“Everyone? You didn’t have anyone? No friends at all?”
Ellie blinked, and her gaze remained fixed on her hands. “Basically, yeah. I mean, there was one girl, but that’s…I don’t want to talk about that right now, actually.” 
“That’s okay,” you said, reaching forward to touch her knee. She flinched at the contact but didn’t brush you away. The image of a young, scared Ellie living somewhere alone made your chest ache. “You don’t have to tell me.” 
“What were you like?” she asked, tilting her head and meeting your eyes. 
“Hmmm…” Mirth crept into your tone. “What do you think?”
“What do I think?” Ellie echoed, her eyes cloudy as she thought. Then a small smirk formed on her face. “Oh god, were you one of those spoiled brats? Were you a mean girl?” 
“God, no,” you said, raising your eyebrows. “Not mean.”
“Then what?”
You paused. “I was really shy, I guess. And quiet, too. I didn’t do much but read for a good 10 years of my life. I used to have awful pronunciation because I would spend more time reading than talking to anyone. But I think I would’ve liked you.”
Ellie shook her head.
“Yes,” you said. “Maybe I would’ve been a little scared of you. I probably would’ve never had the courage to talk to you. But I would’ve liked you, I think.”
“Scared of me?”
“Yeah.”
“Why? I was a kid.”
“I was mostly going off of how I felt when I actually first met you,” you said, shrugging. 
She gasped theatrically. “You’re scared of me?”
“No!” you said, smacking her knee. “That’s not what I mean. You’re just really intimidating.”
“Intimidating?” She looked at you incredulously. 
“You’re so tough,” you explained, feeling heat grow in your cheeks. “You seem just—I don’t know, just so capable. There’s nothing you’re too afraid to face, nothing you’re too afraid to say.”
“That’s not true,” she said lightly. 
“Well, of course I’m sure there are things that you’re afraid of,” you amended. “But you hide it so well. You just seem so…fearless.”
“Hm,” Ellie said, letting her head rest against the headboard. “I think you would’ve made me a nervous wreck. If we’d met when we were kids, I mean.”
“Why?”
She shrugged. “I’ve never met anyone quite like you before. You’re just so untouched.” She winced. “God, no. That sounds gross. I just mean…I dunno. I wouldn’t have known how to act around you. You haven’t had to harden up like everyone else I know.”
“Are you saying I should develop trust issues or something?” you asked, your voice a teasing lilt.
“You know,” she said, nodding seriously, “That is part of it. It was really off-putting how quickly you trusted me. But I guess that’s just a product of where you grew up.” 
“Yeah,” you said softly. “I wonder how I would’ve turned out if I’d grown up like you.”
“Can I be honest?” Ellie asked. 
“Sure.”
“I don’t think you’d still be here if you were me,” she said, her eyes crinkling. “No offense. You just have zero survival skills. I swear that shit has to be genetic. I’ve never met someone more averse to violence in my life.”
You sighed, pressed your hands deep into Ellie’s comforter as a thought hit you. “I think if you’d been born in my position, you would’ve been greater than anything either of us could ever dream of. Much greater than me.”
“Definitely not,” said Ellie. “There’s no fucking way I’m studying the way you apparently do. I honestly think I’d take being an orphan over the study schedule I saw in your bag.” 
She was of course referencing the time table you’d roughly sketched up the morning before you’d ended up in Jackson. It was blocked to the minute, citing the study content and the location of said study session. She’d been beyond horrified to see it. 
You laughed, nudging her socked food with yours. 
“Is there music? In Terranova?”
“Oh,” you said, startled at the abrupt change of subject. “Uh, yeah. Of course. I listened to it all the time.” 
“I used to have a Walkman,” she said, leaning back as she reminisced. She was lying flat on her back now. “It ended up breaking a while ago, but it was like my child.” 
“Have you ever seen a movie before?” you asked, sitting up rigid straight as the thought occurred to you.
“Duh,” she said, giving you a weird look. “Do you think I live under a rock?”
“How many?”
“Hm.” Ellie began counting, ending on her second hand. “I think 6?”
“You’ve seen a total of 6 movies in your life?” 
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to see more?”
She shrugged. “I mean, I guess. It’s just tough to find CDs that are still functional after so long.”
“Hold that thought,” you said, holding a finger in her direction as you stood up.
“Hey!” she called as you bolted out the door. “Where are you going?”
You came bounding back to her room in a matter of seconds, your laptop in your hands. 
“What the fuck?” she said. “Isn’t that your homework thing?”
“Yes,” you said, feeling around for an outlet, “But I also have a ridiculous amount of movies downloaded on this. Our dorm wi-fi is shit and I have way too much storage on this thing, so I just download, like, every movie I’ve ever wanted to watch.”
“Your dorm what?”
You waved your hand. The last thing you wanted to do was explain to her how the 802.11 standard allowed wireless connections a few years after the outbreak. “Not important. Here, come look at this.”
Your laptop roared to light with the help of your charging cord. Quickly, you typed your password in and opened your downloads. Ellie hovered over your shoulder, squinting at the screen with confusion. 
“Here,” you said, opening up the album that had everything you had seen for your entire university career and passing the laptop to Ellie. “Use the touchpad—there, yeah—to navigate. Press to click. These are all movie files that I’ve seen. We can watch them on my laptop. Some of them were filmed in Terranova, too, so they’re post-apocalypse.”
She perused the selection you had for quite some time, the glow of the screen lighting up her face against the dim room. “Okay. This one.”
And thus began a tradition. Each night after you’d finished showering and Joel retired to his room, Ellie would come knock on your door and ask if you wanted to come over. You’d talk for a while, then open your laptop and pick something out to watch. Ellie was never high after the first time, which was unsurprising considering that there definitely wasn’t a way to get any in Jackson. Where she found any the first time was still a mystery to you. 
~
A week or so after your first patrol with Ellie, Joel had taken it upon himself to teach you how to shoot. You were surprisingly not as bad as you’d expected, but the rebound was tough to get used to, and you were still hung up over the whole “killing living things” part. 
Your first patrol—first real one—came quickly, and before you knew it, Ellie was handing you the same gun you’d dropped the first time with a suspicious look. 
“Don’t kill one of us with that thing,” she warned. “Be smart, okay?”
“Sure thing, boss,” you said to her, mock saluting as best you could while you were leading Japan to the mounting block.
She rolled her eyes. “Please act normal or I’ll make you carry around that glorified pocket knife instead again.” 
The patrol began as usual, Ellie leading you down the same path you went last time. It was a beautiful day out, with the early spring sun filtering through the evergreen trees that populated the woods and birdsong filling the air. 
Though conversations with Ellie were getting easier (given that it actually seemed like she wanted to talk to you now), you were still starstruck. Nothing that you did and nothing that you thought could get you to stop seeing her the way you did. You were routinely distracted by everything about her. It was a wonder that you could even function as a normal person around her, much less handle a weapon and a horse. 
You two had nearly made the full rotation when your surroundings exploded in action. 
“Fuck,” Ellie hissed as someone behind you two fired a shot that narrowly missed Shimmer. 
You whipped around, gun in hand, to see two men—two normal men who weren’t infected. One held a bow, the other a gun. 
The one who had fired the first shot never even stood a chance. He was down on the ground seconds after you’d seen him, Ellie’s aim taking him out before you could even ready your gun. 
The second man notched an arrow and managed to draw it back and release into the air right as Ellie’s bullet struck him, sending him falling back. 
“I don’t think there’s any more,” said Ellie, slightly breathless as she scanned the forest. “Sometimes outsiders pull this shit—try to kill us for our supplies. I’ve never seen them this close to the wall, though. I’ll have to tell Maria and Tommy.”
Normally, you would’ve felt up to making some sort of sarcastic comment about how that was a really unconcerning thing for her to tell you and that you actually felt so much more comfortable going on patrol knowing that there were also just run-of-the-mill people trying to kill you, but a twinge in your lower body distracted you. 
Slowly, nervously, you looked down. Air immediately left your lungs. 
“At least we’re done,” Ellie was saying, wiping her hands off on her thighs and slinging the gun over her shoulder. “What a crazy end for your first actual patrol, huh?”
When you didn’t answer, she turned to you and saw the arrow sticking out of your side, 
“Shit,” said Ellie, jumping off Shimmer and reaching you in seconds. “Shit, shit, shit. Oh god.” 
“Am I going to die?” you asked, staring starstruck at the blood escaping the outline of the arrowhead. You couldn’t feel anything anymore. Were you in shock?
“No,” said Ellie firmly. “Absolutely not. Do you need help getting off?”
Before you could answer, she was already helping you down, carefully avoiding the protruding arrow. 
“Listen,” she said, back to being her unwavering self, “We’re right by the wall. I’m going to help you walk in, and then I’ll grab some supplies, okay? Don’t try to pull the arrow out. You hear me? Don’t.”
Swallowing hard, you nodded. She helped you walk the few steps to be carefully concealed by the wall, then grabbed the two horses and darted past you, making a break for Maria and Tommy’s cabin. 
In a haze of confusion, you could see Maria running out, holding a box out to Ellie in exchange for the reins of the horses. Ellie said something that made Maria point towards you. She nodded, then ran back to you.
By the time that she’d reached you, the shock had begun to wear off, replaced by the stinging pain from the object that had impaled you. It was worse than anything you’d ever felt before in your life, and it took all you had not to keel over. 
“Hey,” she said, reaching out to grab your face so you had to look at her. “Don’t be afraid. I’ve done this before, okay? I’m, like, the master. It’s going to be alright.” 
“Done what before?” you managed to grind out. 
Ellie let go of your face to dig through the box Maria had given her, producing a needle, a bottle of rubbing alcohol, and what looked like a spool of thin thread. 
Horror slowly trickled through you as you realized what was about to happen. 
“It doesn’t look all that deep,” Ellie was saying as she examined the arrow. “So I don’t think it’s hit anything. It’s just going to be a nasty hole. I’m going to pull it out now, okay?”
You let out a strangled scream as she grasped the arrow’s end and yanked it out without warning.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” Ellie repeated. She threw the arrow over her shoulder and knelt so she was hovering over you. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you gasped. You were most certainly not. You couldn’t quite get your eyes to focus, and your heart was beating out of your chest. 
“Alright,” she said firmly, grasping your shoulders and pulling you up so you were slumped against the wall. “Sit up straight, alright? Also, this is going to hurt.” 
At first there were just snipping sounds as she cut part of your shirt away—then something cool and wet pressed to your wound. You cried out again as a fresh white hot pain bloomed in your middle. 
“I know, I know.” Ellie’s voice was consoling as she reached up to brush away the sweaty strands of hair stuck to your forehead. “Just a few more seconds.” 
“Fuck—off—” you gritted out from your teeth. 
Ellie’s eyebrows shot up. “I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that. Just this once.” 
She released the alcohol-saturated cotton pad, throwing it aside and fussing with the thread and needle until she was satisfied. 
By the time her fingers were ghosting over your abdomen again, you couldn’t pull your eyes away from the puncture wound and the needle she was wielding. 
“Don’t look,” said Ellie. “Pick something else. You don’t need to watch.” 
“I hate needles,” you whispered, choosing the air over her shoulder to be your focal point. 
There was a prodding at the top of your wound, and you hissed. 
“I can’t say I’m a fan myself.” 
Something pierced through your skin, and your midriff exploded in pain. 
The edges of your sight went fuzzy, stars forming in the corners of your vision. Someone that sounded suspiciously like you cried out. Your cheek rammed up against something solid and warm. 
Once the initial sting had faded, you realized that you’d slumped into Ellie, your face buried into her neck. She didn’t make any move to push you off, instead just taking one hand to brush up and down your arm with a feather light touch. 
“You're fine," she said firmly. "Everything's going to be fine."
Your fingers curled around the hem of her shirt as the needle exited through the other end of your wound, pulling another whine from your throat. It was easier to not feel like you were about to pass out when you were crushed into Ellie, clinging onto her and just focusing on the way she felt against you. 
“Hang on, I'm almost there,” she muttered a few stitches later. You’d quieted down, only letting out the occasional gasp as she pulled the thread through. “You're doing so well. Just one more.”
Now that you were more conscious, you had no idea how she was managing to stitch your side while you were nearly on her lap, but she continued to weave her needle through your skin, pulling it taut. 
“And done,” said Ellie. You felt her take another cotton square to swipe against your skin. 
You laid against her for a few more moments, panting as the shock slowly began to fade. She shifted, and for a moment you were sure that she was going to shove you away, but then the hand she’d lifted hesitantly rested on your head, her fingers parting to card through your hair. 
“How did you learn how to do that?” you asked, your voice muffled from where you were pressed against her. 
“Trial and error.” 
Her joke was enough for you to finally let go, sitting back against the wall. Her hand slithered out of your hair, resting back in her lap. 
“Shut up,” you said. “That’s awful.” 
Ellie shrugged. 
“I’m sorry,” you said, feeling the bumpiness of the stony wall press into your back. “I have a really low pain tolerance.”
“So I’ve noticed,” said Ellie, the side of her mouth quirking. 
“I’ve never been hurt before,” you heard yourself saying. “Like, beyond the occasional splinter or bee sting or accidental scrape or ankle sprain. It’s just not something that happens.” 
“Must be nice.”  
You smiled sadly. “Yeah. It’s not nice being weak, though.” 
Ellie looked away from you then, silent as she packed up the first-aid kit. Then: “I don’t think that’s true.” 
She’d said it lightly, like it was meant to be an offhand comment, a throwaway addition that wouldn’t be remembered by either of you. But the sentiment still struck you, twisting your heart.
You were less capable because your survival had never required anything more. You were weak because you could be. 
Her voice from the night she’d been high floated back to you. You haven't had to harden up like everyone else I know. 
Out here, weakness was a luxury few could afford. 
“Not so untouched anymore, huh?” you said, since you didn’t know how else to respond.
“I won’t tell anyone if you don’t,” quipped Ellie. “But if I were you, I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. I still consider needing to be held to get 4 stitches as being soft. You haven’t changed a bit. No offense.” 
Your cheeks burned bright red. “I—”
“I’m teasing,” she said before you could defend yourself. “Arrow wounds suck. I get it.” 
“Right.” You turned away, keeping your gaze fixed firmly on the ground beside you. With feeling more yourself came the inevitable shame at what you’d just done. What had you been thinking, touching her like that? Grabbing onto her like that?
This was going to haunt you for the rest of your life. 
“Don’t make that face,” said Ellie. “I’m sorry for saying that. I didn’t mean to embarrass you. It really is fine.” 
It was not fine. It would never be fine. You wanted the thugs to come back to life and finish you off, and then have the earth open up and swallow you for good measure. 
Ellie probably thought of you as an overgrown child. You doubted that there was ever a point where she could see you as anything equal. If she ever knew how often she appeared in your imagination, she’d probably be disgusted.
She called you pretty a contrarian voice in your head reminded you. Don't you remember?
But maybe she hadn’t meant it. She hadn’t said it explicitly: “Y/N, I think you’re pretty.” She just hadn’t argued when you’d pointed it out. Maybe because she was being nice, or maybe because she was actually being sarcastic. 
“You were really brave, okay?” said Ellie. “Your first armed confrontation and you did well.”
“I didn’t shoot anyone.”
“It could have gone worse,” said Ellie. “You could’ve accidentally shot me. Or died. And neither of those things happened, so that’s successful in my book.” 
“That’s very glass half-full of you.”
“That’s me. Ever the optimist.” 
You snorted.
~
That night, Ellie knocked on your door and asked you if you were up for another movie. You found yourself sitting on her comforter, plugging in your computer and booting it up minutes later.
Physically speaking, it had always been a little awkward to fit two people on her twin bed if they weren’t right next to each other, given that your laptop screen was a very unimpressive size. When you’d first started watching with her, Ellie would rest against the headboard, her legs stretched out in front of you while you would sit with your legs crossed, positioned sideways so you weren’t accidentally pushing her legs off. 
But after the day you had had, your back was sore and your whole body ached. Sitting on something soft without any back support as you angled yourself to look at the screen was quickly proving unsustainable. 
“Pause,” said Ellie about ten minutes in. You’d been watching an older sci-fi flick—Ellie’s choice. 
You complied, leaning forward and pressing the spacebar. “What’s up?”
“Are you even comfortable sitting like that?”
“Yeah,” you said.
“Liar,” accused Ellie, crossing her arms over her chest. “Don’t think I don’t see you ‘discreetly’ cracking your back every 2 minutes. It’s ruining the movie.” 
“Sorry,” you said, shaking your head and smiling in exasperation. “It’s from all the years I spent hunched over a textbook.” 
“You know, you can sit up here,” she said, patting the space beside her. “I don’t bite.”
“Jury’s still out on that,” you said, though by the time Ellie let out a laugh you were already unfolding your legs and moving so you were next to her. 
She leaned forward, grabbing the bottom half of the laptop and lifting it. “Hey, do you want a blanket?”
“Sure.” 
Ellie’s other hand grabbed the edge of her comforter and held it up. 
Hesitantly, you slid your legs under and watched as Ellie did the same, awkwardly holding the laptop in the air before you were both settled enough to rest it on your covered right thigh and her left.  “Better?”
When you nodded, she reached her tattooed arm out and pressed play. The audio picked back up, but you couldn’t for the life of you focus on the movie.
When Ellie had asked if you’d wanted a blanket, you were expecting her to toss the throw blanket that would really only fit one person at you, not invite you to get under the blankets with her. That was significantly more intimate.
You two were sitting close enough that your sides were touching, from shoulder to thigh. You could feel her chest lift with each breath, feel the heat coming off of her.
After a while, Ellie properly laid down, taking the laptop and hoisting it up so it rested on her lower abdomen as she settled into her pillow.
You gulped, your eyes flickering between her face and the screen. Ellie’s gaze was fixed intently on the screen, her eyes half lidded with exhaustion.
You could be tired too. You weren’t, of course—your heart was racing a thousand miles an hour. But she didn’t know that. It was normal to lay down next to her, right? You’d done that with Irena more times than you could count, and it was never weird. Yeah, you could do that. 
Also, if you were totally horizontal, you would stop getting distracted by the sliver of her skin that her crooked shirt showed of her chest. 
In a moment of blind courage, you scooted down so your head was lying right next to Ellie’s. She didn’t seem to react, just extending her hand from under the covers to steady the laptop as it wobbled from the movement. 
Her sheets smelled like the soap that you used to wash your hair—a cottony freshness that had the slightest hint of lavender. 
“Are you going to fall asleep on me?” asked Ellie after a while, her voice nothing more than a whisper. 
“I could ask you the same thing,” you responded, equally quiet. Then, because you hadn’t made enough rash decisions for the night, you angled your head so it rested in the space right above her shoulder. 
She inhaled sharply but didn’t move. On her next exhale a piece of her auburn hair tickled your forehead. 
“How’re your stitches?” she asked suddenly, like she'd just remembered.
“They’re okay. I think. As stitches go.”
“After this is over, I’ll check on them,” she said. “Don’t let me forget, okay?”
“Okay,” you whispered, suddenly feeling shy. It was one thing for her to cut off your shirt and see your skin when she was trying to save your life while you were mentally gone. It was another thing altogether to pull up your shirt without adrenaline coursing through you.
You didn’t pay any attention to the rest of the movie, instead hyperfocused on the rhythm of Ellie’s breathing and the fact that if you moved just a little your chin would be on her shoulder. 
Her mention of the stitches wasn’t helping at all, either. Now all you could think about was the embarrassing way you’d basically tried to crawl under her skin, burying your face into her and clutching at her clothes like you were a child.
A part of you was disappointed that you hadn’t been more lucid at the time. If you had, you would’ve been able to clearly remember the softness of her skin against yours. You would’ve been able to enjoy it for what it was—the only time you’d be able to touch her like that.
Because you couldn’t go around just grabbing onto her shirt and getting into her lap. That was a one-off, the only time that the rules were waived. You couldn’t touch her like that now, now that you didn’t have any excuse. It wasn’t allowed.
But sometimes you wanted to so badly that it hurt. 
The movie ended abruptly, wrenching you out of your thoughts. 
“Hey,” whispered Ellie. “Sit up so I can see.”
Reluctantly, you pressed yourself up from your back and began rolling up the hem of your shirt. Ellie twisted to face backwards, her thin top riding up and showing part of her back as she reached for the lamp.
Once golden light returned to the room, Ellie turned back and bumped your hands away. She bent over, tilting her head so that she was looking at the stitches straight on.
They didn’t look bad, you had to admit. Though you wouldn’t consider the actual experience of getting the stitches a 5-star experience, Ellie had clearly known what she was doing. The surrounding flesh didn’t look angry or irritated, and she’d pulled the stitches just tight enough without it puckering. 
She prodded at the side, then gave a satisfied nod. “Looks good. What did I tell you? I’m really good at this sort of stuff.”
“I think you would’ve made a really good doctor,” you said once she’d sat up straight again. “Under different circumstances.”
“Is this you telling me that you don’t think I’m a good doctor now?” she teased. 
“Your bedside manner could use some work,” you offered.
Ellie laughed then, shaking her head and crossing her arms over her chest. “Yeah, yeah. You lived. You'll get over it.” 
“Did you go to school?” you found yourself asking, hung up on the thought of Ellie as a potential medical student. If she’d been in one of your intro biology classes, you never would’ve been able to pay attention. That was a fantasy you could shelve away for later. 
“Sort of,” said Ellie, looking down at her arms. “I went to a military prep school run by FEDRA. I didn’t graduate though—obviously. I was long gone by then.” 
“Right,” you said, remembering that she’d mentioned that she’d been 14 when she’d left Boston. “And what was it like?” 
She paused, opening her mouth before closing it. “It was—unkind. Joel's told me about schools before the outbreak. It was nothing like that. There were some normal classes, but most of it was meant to prepare us to be soldiers.” 
“Is that where you learned how to do sutures?” 
“Among other things.”
Terranova had no military academies, given that there was hardly any military presence. The founder of Terranova had bodyguards and there was a police force that controlled the borders, but it was nothing like Ellie described. With invisible borders and a social order that valued peace and tranquility over all else, there was no real danger posed to any of the citizens. 
But from what you had learned from movies and books and comments from older people, you had gathered a very dim picture of what a military academy looked like—harsh, strict, and cruel. 
“I’m sorry you had to grow up like that,” you said. 
“It’s okay.”
“Is there anything you would want to study? If you could?” 
Ellie’s eyes closed. “Yeah. There are a couple things.” 
She did not elaborate. 
~
It didn’t take long for you two to settle back into your routine of meeting in her room each evening and watching one of your downloaded movies. Following the night after you’d gotten your stitches, you wouldn’t even have to ask—Ellie would pull up her comforter and let you slide in next to her without giving you a second glance.
You’d also gotten over the fear of touching her. Now, when you flopped back so your head was on her pillow, you’d adjust until you were nestled into the crook of her neck. She never once reacted to it, remaining perfectly still unless she was adjusting the laptop or messing with the sound. 
Because it was normal, of course. You and Irena would rest your head on each other’s shoulders sometimes. That was something that friends did. 
One night a week or so into April, you and Ellie made a harrowing discovery: there was only one movie left in your collection that you two hadn’t seen together. 
“Damn,” said Ellie, furrowing her brow. “And there’s no way to get more on here?”
“I’m afraid not,” you said, frowning. “To download more or stream one, I’d need either an Ethernet cable or a wi-fi connection. Neither of which function out here anymore without cell towers and maintained cables.” 
“Right,” said Ellie, though her face told you that she didn’t understand a word that had come out of your mouth. “So—this is it?”
“Yeah.” Your finger hovered over the play button. “Savor it, I guess.” 
When you settled back and into her side, the heavy weight of dread settled into your stomach. Now that you’d finished showing her your entire collection, it’s not like she’d have a reason to invite you over every night. And there was especially no reason for you two to lie so closely together unless you were both trying to watch something on a small screen.
Once again, your excuse to touch her was gone.
You pressed closer to her as your mind raced. There was no way that Ellie didn’t see what you were doing as platonic, right? Was it possible that she was creeped out by how touchy you were but just tolerated it to be nice? 
Maybe. You swallowed hard, keeping your eyes fixed on the screen. Ellie didn’t see you like…like that. She spoke to you like you were an obligation, a burden. Because you always had been. You’d been a responsibility thrust on her by a father figure who felt like he was indebted to you from that stupid bag of coffee you were lucky enough to bring. 
Oh, god. Had Joel told her to befriend you? Had he asked for Ellie to pretend like she enjoyed spending time with you and to put up with your privileged, soft-hearted nonsense? 
The knowledge that you were spiraling wasn’t enough to stop you. You did the best that you could—tried to remind yourself that it’d been a while since she’d looked disgusted with you, recall that she was outspoken enough to tell you to fuck off if you did something she didn’t like—but it was to no avail.
Ellie reached forward and hit pause on the movie, thrusting you both into silence. 
“Is everything okay?” she asked after a moment. 
“Yeah, why?” 
“I can feel your heart going, like, crazy fast.” 
You froze. “Oh. Uh, yeah. I was just thinking.” 
Ellie pushed the laptop off of her, sitting up to give you an odd look. “About a near death experience or something? You running a marathon up there? That shit’s not normal.” 
You laughed nervously. “It’s really nothing. Just an, uh, suspenseful movie.” 
Which was actually really stupid of you to say, because you were watching some obscure Tarkovsky film that did nothing but pan over burning buildings and pensive men. For the past 5 minutes, there had been nothing on screen but the back of a car driving through traffic with minimal sound. Also, it was in Russian, and the English subtitles made zero sense.
There was a reason why this was the last movie you chose.
“This is the most boring fucking movie I’ve ever watched in my life, so you’re a dirty fucking liar,” said Ellie. Then her face pinched in worry. “Wait. Have you taken a look at your stitches lately?” 
Before you could answer, she was grabbing a flashlight off her nightstand and yanking the comforter off you. She was pulling your shirt up when you finally found your voice.
“Wait!” you said, grabbing the bottom of your shirt and yanking it back in place. “It’s not—I don’t have an infection, okay? There’s nothing wrong with me. I really was just thinking, okay?”
“About what?” She reached back to place her flashlight back on the stand without taking her eyes off you. 
“It’s nothing important.”
“If you say so.” 
She picked the laptop up and placed it back on her thighs, lying back down. You followed suit, but this time you didn’t touch her, opting to keep as much distance as you could so she wouldn’t hear the stuttering of your heart. 
Not even 5 minutes had passed before Ellie sat up to pause the video again.
“Is something wrong?” she asked.
“No. Why?” 
“You’re acting weird,” she accused, but there wasn’t much conviction behind her voice. 
“What do you mean?” 
“I mean that you’re acting weird,” she repeated, shutting your laptop off and moving it to the bottom of her bed, despite the protests that left your lips. 
“I don’t understand,” you said. “I’m just watching the movie. I’m not doing anything. “
“You’re not watching the movie,” she said. “You weren’t even looking at the screen. What’s got you so bothered? Did I do something?” 
“Of course not.” You pulled your legs under you so your legs were crossed and your back was against the wall. “You don’t need to worry. It’s honestly fine. I’m sorry if I’ve done something to imply otherwise.” 
Ellie rubbed the bridge of her nose, sighing. “You stress me out. You can just tell me, you know? No need to be so cagey. I promise I’ve heard worse.” 
“Don’t be so quick to say that.”
“Okay, now you have to tell me,” she said. “I’m never going to know peace again with a hook like that.” 
You were about to open your mouth to tell her that it was stupid and that it didn’t matter, but something stopped you. 
That was the coward’s way out. That’s what you’d always done—hid your feelings and concealed your emotions. That’s how you’d been raised. That’s how you thought everyone was. But now that you’d spent 2 months in Jackson, you’d realized that some people actually just said what they thought. And that, in the grand scheme of things, it was a better system than the Terranovian culture of superficiality.  
Just because the you 2 months ago would have shook her head and changed the subject didn’t mean the you now had to. 
Maybe this you could be different. Maybe, for once, this you could be brave. 
“I really—” You stopped yourself. Saying I really like you didn’t even begin to encompass what you felt for the girl sitting across from you. To distill the sheer magnitude of your feelings down to four words felt criminal. The swell in your chest that never went away whenever you were near her could never and would never be adequately represented in the puny offerings of the Latin alphabet and the English language, and if you were going to do this, you were going to do it right. 
You dared to look up at her for a moment. She was completely still, her green eyes reflecting the dim moonlight from outside. Once you met her gaze, you couldn’t bring yourself to pull it away.
“I’m really sorry that I’m putting you in an uncomfortable position for saying this,” you began (because old habits ran deep, and you would rather die than be impolite), “And I totally understand if you don’t want to talk to me after this. And I’m sorry for not telling you earlier.”
“As much as I’m sure that this is some sort of cultural cornerstone for you, please spare me the 6 foot long disclaimer script,” Ellie drawled.
“Right.” You gulped. “Anyway. As I was saying.”
“Any day now.” 
At that moment, she had never looked more perfect. Your eyes had adjusted to the dark lighting, so the weak moonlight that spilled in from the window above her created a halo around her head. 
“It’s you.” Your voice came out tiny. “You’re all that I can think about, and I don’t know what to do.”
There. It was off your chest.
For a moment, it was as if you’d suspended time, stopping Earth on its axis as you both held your breaths. There was nothing but silence and the occasional wooden creak of the old house’s foundation in the wind. 
Ellie’s face betrayed nothing, save for something in her eyes and the disappearance of the smirk that had been on her lips moments before. 
Then she spoke, her response whispered.
“Come here, then.” 
final a/n: NOW HOLD ON before you show up outside my dorm with pitchforks and torches 🗣️🗣️🗣️ i'm so sorry but this was a necessary evil as this was going to a massive scene without the chapter break. also a disproportionately massive chapter compared to the other ones coming out. i write very quickly and should get the following part out in a timeframe similar to the first 3 parts. thank u for reading ! tell me what you think abt this chapter while you wait x
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writingonleaves · 8 months
Text
and all at once, you’re all i want (i’ll never let you go) - jack hughes
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pairing: jack hughes x original female character
warnings: literally nothing. fluff! some minor worship of nina hischier (the goat), a little love letter to my alma mater
title: "king of my heart" by taylor swift
word count: 10.3k
author's note: first fic in the new year is for @wyattjohnston 's winter fic exchange 2k24!! i had the absolute pleasure of writing for @wildrangers <3 taylor, i hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed putting it together and demi, thank you for your endless hard work for putting this on!!
four times where jack hughes and ashley grassie showed up for each other and one time where everyone showed up for them
*****
one - two months
“Jack, are you sure about this?” Ashley asks, fiddling with the silver rings on her fingers. 
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He responds confidently, sparing a look at her from the drivers seat before turning his eyes back on the road. “Everyone’s expecting you.”
“You told them?”
“That my girlfriend was coming with me to a New Year’s party? Of course.” He squeezes her thigh lightly. “They’re excited to meet you. And not while we’re working.”
“I’m excited to meet them too.”
“You sure?” He teases lightly. “You’ve been quiet all afternoon.”
“Yeah, yeah. Sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry about.” They stop at a red light, and he leans over to kiss her cheek. “Ash, baby, they’re gonna love you.”
“But you don’t know that,” she protests softly. 
“I do, actually. Because everyone loves you.”
She rolls her eyes. “You can’t promise me that everyone’s gonna even like me.”
He shrugs. “I’ll prove you wrong. You’ll see.” He tugs at her gold sweater. “Is this new?”
“Yeah. Seems fitting for the occasion. Sparkles equals New Years, right?”
“I like it a lot.”
“I know what you’re doing,” she deadpans. 
He smirks. “And what might that be?”
“Distracting me.”
“Maybe so. You’re so smart, Miss Columbia Grad.”
“Jack,” she whines, making him laugh. 
He picks up her hand and kisses the back of it. “Trust me, okay? It’ll be great. And I’ll be with you all night.”
Ashley swallows, before forcing herself to nod. 
The thing is, after two months of dating officially (she’s not counting the month beforehand when there wasn’t a label on things even though there should’ve been), there are still important parts of each other’s lives they have yet to experience together. She’s gone to a few of his games, but has never met any of his teammates (except for Luke, but he doesn’t count), choosing to meet Jack back at his place after instead of waiting for him at the rink. She also doesn’t count that one Devils game she had to fill in for, which is how she met Jack in the first place. The few times he’s invited her along when he does go out with them, she’s been busy with other things. 
New Year’s is kinda a big time to be meeting new people. People that mean a lot to Jack. But that could just also be all in Ashley’s head. She’s never really done this before. The last serious boyfriend she had was in high school where everyone knew each other. There was no need for introductions. 
Jack squeezes her hand. “Thank you.” 
“For?” 
“Coming with me to this. Taking off work early. I appreciate it a lot.” 
She shrugs casually. “It’s about time, right?” She pointedly ignores the look he shoots her, because she doesn’t want him to know how nervous she really is.
Before they know it, Jack’s pulled into the driveway of the Toffolis and her hands start sweating again. She gathers the flowers on her lap and the wine bag as Jack rounds the car and opens the door for her. He grabs the bag, presses a kiss atop her head and hand in hand, they walk to the front door. She lets Jack take the lead as he just walks in. They walk into the kitchen area, as Cat pulls her into a hug and thanks them graciously for the flowers and wine.
It turns out that Ashley really does have nothing to worry about. Getting thrown into a whirlwind of introductions and new names is a lot, but she doesn’t mind. A wave of comfort crashes over her as Luke practically hauls her into a hug. 
She finds herself besides Nico after he hands her a glass of wine. “You’re a journalist, right?” He asks.
“I am.”
“Do you ever watch Jack’s media interviews?”
Ashley giggles. “I do once in awhile. Trust me, I have my thoughts. I also met him for the first time from that. And you, technically.”
“Right, right. Will we ever see you in the locker room again?”
“Probably not. I was just filling in for Danny. On the rare chance I do sports, it’s usually for the Jets. Besides, better to watch and support you all without any stake professionally.”
“What do you usually report on?” Nico asks with genuine curiosity. 
She perks up, like anytime she gets to talk about her job. As she talks, using her hands animatedly despite one of them holding a drink, Jack looks on from a distance with a lovesick look in his eyes.
“She is way too cool for you,” Dawson says, fixing his cap.
Jack rolls his eyes. “Shut up.” But Jack knows his teammate’s right.
Jack’s not clingy, perse, but it’s hard for him to watch Ashley just…be and not be touching a part of her. Even if it’s just sliding up against her so her body is pressed alongside his, he just wants to be near her all the time. 
(Quinn once sent some random thing he found on Instagram about love languages a few years back and Jack had remembered absolutely roasting him. But maybe he had a point)
“So,” Nicole starts, refilling both their glasses up with champagne a bit later in the evening. “Why Jack?”
Ashley snorts. “Your guess is as good as mine.” From beside his girlfriend, Jesper barks out a laugh and from next to Ashley, Jack pouts. Ashley laughs, leaning into Jack’s side. “I’m kidding. Mostly. I was hesitant at first though.”
“Oh, yeah. He told me about this,” Jesper says. “Said he chased you down the hall after post-game media and asked you out?”
“Sounds about right.”
“And you said yes to that?” Jesper asks. Jack whacks his teammate in the stomach. 
“Not right away,” Ashley admits. “He gave me his number and told me to text him if I was interested. And I ended up being interested.”
“Lucky for him,” Nicole chuckles. 
Jack squeezes Ashley’s waist fondly. “Lucky for me.”
She listens on in interest as Nicole talks about how she and Jesper got together. Somewhere throughout the conversation, she can’t help but let her mind drift. They’ve been together for years now, been living together for a bit and are looking to move into a house. She literally moved away from Sweden full-time for him. 
Ashley swallows as Jack asks about how their house search is going. There’s a very little chance that Jack will be leaving Jersey anytime within the next half decade. But her mother warned her that his career could take him places in the future unexpectedly. 
And in a way, so could Ashley’s. But it’s not as easy. 
She scolds herself for even thinking this far. They’ve been dating for literally two months. That’s nothing in the grand scheme of things. They’re celebrating entering the new year today, but she has no idea if they’ll even be together for all of it.
She’s hoping they are. God, she really fucking hopes so. But she could hope until the end of the world and have it fall short. She smoothes her sweater out with her suddenly-clammy hands, chugging the whole glass of champagne before putting the flute down on a nearby table. She excuses herself politely to use the bathroom, which she does, before getting some air. 
She definitely looks a bit crazy outside on the Toffoli’s porch in the dead of winter, but she doesn’t mind the biting edge of cold. It’s grounding her, actually. 
“Was looking for you.”
Ashley doesn’t even look at Jack, humming as she hears him walking out to stand next to her. “Did my sparkle sweater give me away?”
“No, Neeks did, actually. Said he saw you walking out.” She finally looks at him with his eyebrows furrowed. “You’re not cold?”
“Don’t even think about offering me your jacket,” she warns. “I know you’re only wearing a t-shirt underneath.”
“Then come back inside so we both don’t die.”
“In a minute,” she promises. 
He huffs, rubbing his hands up and down her arms to try and generate some heat. “Everything good?”
“Yeah, yeah.” Just, you know, minorly freaking out at her boyfriend’s teammate’s place about the fact that she might be falling in love with him even though it hasn’t been that long and what a future could look like for them and how that future could fall apart in an instant.
So regular New Year’s Eve thoughts.
“Unlike you, I don’t have a college degree, much less two,” Jack grins. “I can’t read minds.”
“And you think I can?” She jokes back weakly. He just chuckles. She continues. “Your friends are nice. I like them a lot.”
He lights up anytime someone he loves gets brought up in conversation. “Yeah, they’re cool. They like you too.”
“That’s good,” she says softly. 
He taps her forehead with his pointer finger. “Countdown’s soon. Come back inside?” He laces their fingers together. 
“You gonna kiss me at midnight?”
“Think so.”
“You only think so?”
Jack smirks, kissing her deeply. “Shut up.”
Ashley is absolutely floored.
two - one year and one month
Cam’s wedding crept up on her. 
Of course, Ashley knew it was coming, but still. Though she was surprised when Jack told her that he was free of games on that particular early November weekend somehow, only having to miss an optional practice and that he would notify the coaching staff far in advance. 
It’s not the act of bringing Jack that she’s nervous about. Cam and Amanda, his fiance, came into the city a few months ago and they all grabbed lunch before heading to a game at The Rock that night. She’ll never forget how ultimately “traitor-like to the Bruins” Cam felt, Ashley and Amanda finding it hilarious. They both had a good time though, and that’s all that matters, and Cam, who has always looked out for her even before she had ever asked, subtly gave his approval. 
(“I’ll admit my assumptions about him were wrong,” Cam had said. “He’s awesome, and he really cares about you. If he’s the one, I won’t be mad about it. He’s very lucky.”)
It’s more of a particular person that’s going to be at the wedding. 
Weirdly, when she and Alex broke up way back when, one of the thoughts that circled her mind months after was exactly this. If and when the day of Cam’s wedding came, and they were both still close to him, they’d both be there. And here they are. 
She’s over him — obviously, considering she’s in a happy, long-term relationship and it’s been four years — but how do you prepare to see your ex-boyfriend when the last time you saw him you had just broken up and you were in tears?
She and Jack drive up to Cape Cod early the day of the wedding and she feels a bit bad that he’s driving after he had a game last night and has one in just two days but he doesn’t mind, happy to be driving as long as she’s in the passenger seat next to him. They’re switching off anyways, and she had driven the first half. Cam and Amanda rented out a bunch of rooms at a few inns for their guests so her and Jack will get ready there before heading to the venue. 
From a quick rundown Cam gave her a month ago when they caught up over the phone, she’ll at least be familiar with a good amount of people at the wedding. She’s excited to see them all again and catch up, those memories that were bittersweet at some point, all water under the bridge so many years later. 
It’s what you get for dating within a friend group. Ultimately, at some point, sides are chosen.
At the end of the day, it’s Cam, someone who has always been there for her since they were 16, even when she didn’t necessarily do the same. He’s given his friendship selflessly to her for over a decade. The least she can do is come to his wedding to celebrate. 
And she has Jack with her. Nothing can go wrong with Jack by her side. 
“You okay?” Jack’s voice breaks her out of her thoughts as he squeezes her thigh, sneaking a look before focusing back on the road. “You’re quiet. You’re rarely quiet in the car.”
“It’s a 5 hour drive, Jack.”
“I’ve been playing country nonstop for the last half an hour and you haven’t chirped me once.” She starts playing with his fingers and his eyebrows furrow. “Alright. What’s going on, baby? What are you thinking about?”
“You know what I’m thinking about.” She shoots back with no malice. 
He sighs, linking their hands together and bringing them up to his lips to kiss her knuckles. “Yeah. I got you though. I’ll be with you the whole day.”
“It’s dumb, really. Four years. And I haven’t thought about him in a long time.”
He shrugs. “He was your first heartbreak, and you haven’t seen him since. This is gonna be some sort of closure, even if it’s four years later.”
“You seem awfully cool about this, considering, you know, your current girlfriend is lowkey freaking out about seeing her ex again.”
“I’m not worried,” he replies easily. “You need this closure. I wasn’t smart like you back then and actually saw my exes probably way sooner than I should’ve. Besides, I’m the one on your arm now. Not him. I’m not pressed.”
She scoffs at yet another country song playing and skips it, snorting when ‘Suburban Legends’ by Taylor Swift comes on. How fitting. “I’m definitely hyping it up in my head. It’s nothing. And Cam told me that he purposefully put us at separate tables, in case Alex says some questionable shit while drunk.”
“No worries about you saying anything questionable?”
“Compared to Alex? No way.” He snorts, amused. But he knows enough about his girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend to not push it. “I wonder if he’s bringing someone. God, I hope he is.”
“Why? Don’t want to rub it in his face that you’re happy and in love?”
“That’s mean,” she says airily. “No. I hope he’s bringing someone because I want to know what kind of girl can tolerate his ass. I did, but I was 20 and stupid. I wanna see what kind of girl can tolerate him at 26.”
“Does he know I’m coming?”
“Cam?”
He snorts. “No. Alex.”
“Who knows? Even if he does, he probably doesn’t care and isn’t overthinking it like I am.”
“I think you’d be surprised,” she looks at him, confused and he bites his lip. “Even if they play it off, guys are affected by that stuff more than you’d think.”
“What is there to be affected by?”
“You,” Jack says simply. “Not that I’m biased or anything, but you leave quite an impact on everyone you meet. And that lucky ass got to date you. As someone who also has had that privilege, I can relate a bit.”
Ashley chuckles before squeezing his hand. “Thanks for coming with me. I know your schedule is really busy with the season and everything-”
“You don’t need to thank me. Isn’t half of having a significant other just bringing them as plus ones to weddings?”
“Fair.” She leans her head on his shoulder momentarily as he pushes the sunglasses on top of his head to his face. “Thank you, though. I feel bad that you’re missing practice.”
He snorts. “Don’t.”
“They didn’t give you a hard time?”
“Not really. It’s an optional, anyways. Nico just told us to have fun and I think Lindy has a soft spot for you somehow. I’m excited. I like Cam. And I’m happy to be here with you.” He smirks, adding. “Come on, baby. Did you think I was gonna leave you to dry when your ex is gonna be there?”
“You don’t know anybody at the wedding. And Cam grew up in a hockey-loving family from Boston. There’s bound to be people who recognize you.”
“So I’m the arm candy for the night. That works perfectly for me.” 
They arrive at the inn just past 1, and decide to stop by a nearby cafe to grab a quick bite. Jack decides to take a short nap before they have to start getting ready and head out while she scrolls on her phone and plays with his hair since his head is on her lap. Occasionally she finds herself staring outside the window at the water with a smile. Even if not in the summer, the Cape is beautiful.
Once it hits 4:15, she figures that she should start getting ready, but she can’t move without disturbing Jack since he’s still sleeping soundly on her lap. She gently whispers his name and presses a few kisses on his forehead as his breathing changes, groaning a bit as he stretches and opens his eyes. 
“Time to go?”
“In like, an hour. I need to start getting ready.”
He hums, puckering his lips and she takes the hint, kissing him soundly twice before ushering him off her lap. She lays out the few makeup products she has, moisturizing her face before putting light foundation and concealer on. As always, she focuses more attention on her eyeshadow, deciding to add a bit of gold glitter to compliment her pink dress. She clips a matching pink bow in, liking the way it blends with the natural brown of her hair. She decides to save the lipstick for right before they leave and turns to Jack, who’s buttoning his shirt. 
“What do you think?” He looks up as he’s buttoning his cuffs. “Too much glitter?” She asks.
“Never too much glitter. You look beautiful.”
She looks at his blazer and tie that he’s laid out on the bed, looking at him with minor confusion. “Since when do you own that tie?”
“Since last week when I bought it.”
She looks at where her dress is hanging. “It matches my dress.”
“Yes it does.”
She looks towards him as he tucks his shirt in, a sudden wave of love rushing through her heart. “I love you.”
He looks up and immediately walks over to her, placing a hand on her waist and kissing her. “I love you too.”
She puts on her dress quickly, smiling when she doesn’t even have to ask Jack as he comes over to help her zip it up, pressing a chaste kiss on her shoulder. His phone ringing interrupts and she brushes her hair before she puts on her accessories. 
“Sup Quinny?”
Quinn’s voice crackles through Jack’s phone. “Where the fuck are you going all dressed up on a Saturday? I know for a fact you don’t have a game today, considering Luke just sent a snap of him playing Chel with Dawson 10 minutes ago.”
“I’m in the Cape, asshole. One of Ash’s friends is getting married.”
She peeks into the view of the camera and waves after putting in one earring. “Hi Quinn!”
“Oh! Hey Ash. You look beautiful.”
She beams. “Thank you!”
Jack scoffs. “I’m here too.”
Ashley leaves the brothers to catch up as she starts gathering her things and puts on her lip tint before sitting at the edge of the bed since they still have 15 minutes left before they have to head out and she’s mostly all ready to go. She chimes in once in awhile, always happy to talk to Quinn as Jack shrugs on his suit jacket, ties his matching pink tie and clasps on his watch.
“Looking good, you two.” Quinn says as they both stand in front of the phone. “Matching tie, eh? Good move, Jacky.”
“We look good enough to make an ex jealous?”
She just rolls her eyes as Quinn’s eyes lights up, immediately catching on. “Absolutely.”
“Don’t encourage him, Quinn.”
Quinn just laughs and bids them farewell as Jack smooths down his tie. She puts on her jacket and grabs her boots and slips them on. As she’s about to bend down and tie them, Jack ushers her to sit on the bed and kneels down. He does it too quickly for her to dwell too much on how much she loves him, but he probably knows, if him gently rubbing his thumb over her ankle and the kiss on the inside of her knee tell her anything. 
It’s only been a little over a year, but she really does think she could spend the rest of her life with him.
They end up running into Nick in the lobby and even though it’s been…four years since she’s seen him, she corrals him into a tight hug. She introduces Jack and Nick introduces Melanie, his fiancee. The only indication from Nick that he knows who Jack is is a subtle comment that’s delivered in a way that’s so Nick it makes her heart ache — “Jack Hughes. Only Ash would show up after almost five years in the flesh with a professional athlete at a wedding where her ex is gonna be at. Always gotta do some out of pocket shit.” — and makes Jack laugh as she slaps him.
The four of them walk the short seven minute walk to the venue together, with Ashley and Nick mostly leading the conversation. She can’t remember where they left their tentative friendship in their late teens and early twenties when the world was shut down and the future looked the most uncertain it had been. Even though they don’t immediately pick up where they left off, years of rust littered in their interactions and memories, she’s extremely happy to see that he’s doing well. 
(Jack’s just happy to be there, holding his girlfriend’s hand as she leads the conversation. It’s nice not having to lead for once. There’s not many situations where he’s the one tagging along) 
As they enter the ceremony space, Ashley immediately sees plenty of other people she recognizes. She chuckles to herself as she realizes many of the guys are from the soccer team. It’s touching to know they still keep in touch. Logan, one of said guys, greets Nick goodheartedly, before wrangling her into a hug. As pleasantries are exchanged and people are introduced, she does feel a bit out of place. But that’s natural, reconnecting with people after so long that clearly still hang out with each other and only hear about her through sporadic updates through Cam when they ask. 
Sides were chosen, even if not intentionally. Ashley’s learned to be okay with that. Even if she thinks it’s unfair that Alex got to keep a lot of their mutual friends and she didn’t.
As everyone settles down in their seats, she squeezes Jack’s hand, opening her mouth to apologize for…something. Not preparing him in giving the whole lore of how she knows all these people? How the only reason she knows the sport of soccer is so well is because of Alex? Not explaining clearly the mixed feelings of her coming to the Cape this weekend? 
But Jack’s enraptured in a conversation with Logan, and she smiles. Of course. Logan played hockey back in high school as well. 
(Out of instinct, Jack does squeeze her hand back though, even placing them in his lap even though he’s not looking in her direction at all)
When Alex comes into view, a pretty redhead’s hand around the crook of his elbow, Ashley starts sweating. Thank goodness she has deodorant in her bag. Jack, who’s still talking to Logan, notices, and she’s about to apologize for her clammy hands as he sends her a confused look but the nearby exclamations of Alex’s name answers his question. He just presses two kisses to her temple.
Logan, to his credit, grimaces. “You gonna be good, Ash?”
She waves his kindness away. “Of course. It’s been so long. And it’s Cam’s day.”
And it is Cam’s day, as everyone falls silent watching both sets of parents and the groomsmen and bridesmaids walk down — she chuckles when she sees Sean walking down, forgetting that he and Cam got closer in college even after going to the same high school — before grinning as Amanda walks down in her beautiful A-line, ball gown of a wedding dress. Ashley wipes a tear away watching Cam do the same and she thinks if only 16 year old them could see themselves now. 
(She has a moment when she looks at Jack where her stomach flips, thinking of the day they could be the ones at the altar. She quickly focuses her attention back to the front)
Cam and Amanda are pronounced husband and wife and she cheers as he dips her and kisses her, beaming and tearing up and laughing as she hears Nick wolf-whistle. People start dispersing, the large heated patio hosting a cocktail hour before the doors to the reception hall open back up again.
While she’s sipping on a glass of wine, she hears a familiar voice calling her name and she beams, carefully making sure she doesn’t spill any wine on Sean’s tuxedo as he towers over her and hugs her tightly. He introduces himself to Jack and she watches in slight amusement as they talk. 
Sean and her never really were friends, more friends by association. He was more in the popular crowd in the school that Ashley herself was never inclined to push her way through. Her and Sean shared plenty of classes together though, and always got along when forced to work together. And in another life, sometimes Ashley thinks that she would’ve had a crush on the blonde boy. 
Instead, she dated one of his teammates. And, well, that turned out the way it did.
(Ashley rolls her eyes when Sean makes a comment about how it “makes complete sense that you’re the one who ended up dating a professional athlete” because sure, Sean. Sure.)
Jack may be among many Massachusetts natives who live and die for the Bruins and are not hesitant in chirping him within 5 minutes of meeting him, but he smiles genuinely as his hand instinctively finds a way on her lower back. After dating Ashley for over a year, he’s used to the good-intentioned bluntness of New Englanders. She only starts rolling her eyes when high school gets brought up and stories about her start piling up. In contrast, Jack loves this and just eggs them on, eager to hear the stories. 
With a quick glance at the seating chart when they’re all starting to filter back into the reception hall, she finds that the high school crowd is split between two tables, and that Cam kept to his word and put her and Alex at different ones. The tables next to each other, but still. She won’t have to worry about making accidental awkward eye contact with him across her chicken. She’s the slightest bit surprised she hasn’t crossed direct paths with him yet. But there’s enough people that they wouldn’t ever be forced to interact. And maybe that’s for the best. 
Dinner passes by without incident, Ashley squeezing both Cam and Amanda tight as they come around to toast every table as Jack gives Cam a tight bro-hug and Amanda a polite kiss on the cheek. The dance floor starts to open up, and as usual, Ashley’s one of the first ones on, dragging Jack and practically their whole table out. She feels light on her feet and happy as she leans into Jack with a big smile. He ditches his suit jacket at the table and his pink tie is loosened and she thinks he looks so handsome. She’s happily tipsy enough where the curious glances and whispers from probably the entire fucking reception hall about why an NHL player is here don’t bother her. She knows he’s used to it. She doesn’t know how.
(Jack may not know everything of the lore and context behind Ashley’s relationship with the people she knows here, but he knows her and how deeply she feels and nostalgic she can get and how that can change her perception of her own memories and how that in turn, can make her extremely self critical. 
So this whole evening, he’s tried to make it as easy as possible, talking with her old friends and classmates — which isn’t much of an ask, they’re nice enough — and just squeezing her hand or waist or kissing her temple or cheek when he feels her focus trailing off. If she talks to Alex and wants him there, he’ll be right next to her. If not, he’ll make himself scarce. Whatever she wants)
Ashley’s resting at her chair while Jack’s in a casual conversation with Cam as Alex comes up behind Cam, tapping him on the shoulder. She swallows and sits up straight and Jack automatically places a gentle hand on her back. Cam and Alex exchange a few words she can’t hear before Cam turns his attention back to her and Jack feels a surge of gratitude towards Cam, who looks extremely apologetic. 
Jack watches as she stands up and steps towards Alex with a small smile. “Hey.”
Alex blinks. “Hi.” She gives him a quick hug before stepping back next to Jack as he stands up. “Alex, this is Jack, my boyfriend. Jack, Alex.”
“Nice to meet you, man.” Jack says with a firm, polite handshake and he doesn’t really see (or care about) Alex’s reaction before turning back to Ashley again, trying to read her. She gives him an almost imperceptible nod. Jack’s eyes flicker to Cam, who also nods behind Alex and he clears his throat. “I’m gonna get a refill. You two want anything?”
“All good, man.”
“Rum and coke, heavier on the coke?”
“You got it,” Jack presses a quick kiss to her hair before he and Cam walk to the bar. 
Jack waves to the bartender for a whiskey sour for himself as Cam gets a gin and tonic. They both lean against the counter and Jack sighs, watching Alex take Jack’s previous seat. “Was that a good idea? Leaving them alone?” Because he knows her, of course, but Cam’s known her longer. And he had a front row seat to her and Alex’s friendship before they got together, their relationship when they got together, and the fallout of their breakup. 
“Honestly? I don’t know. But they’re both 26 year old mature adults.” Cam’s eyes flit over to a redhead woman a couple seats away from the bar and waves her over. Jack’s trying to remember if he’s met her tonight
“Hi Cam,” she says lightly. 
“Hey yourself,” he nods over in the direction of her and Alex. “You initiate that?”
She snorts, “Of course I did.” She perches herself on a stool and sticks her hand out to Jack. “I don’t think we’ve met yet. I’m Francesca, but please call me Fran. I’m Alex’s girlfriend.”
Jack gives her a small smile. This is something. “Jack. Ashley’s boyfriend.”
“I’m aware,” she teases. “I grew up in Jersey and my brother’s a huge hockey fan. I’ve been to a couple of your games throughout the years.”
“Always nice to meet a fan,” He responds smoothly and genuinely. “Especially in a room filled with Bruins fans that could honestly poison my drink at any moment and I wouldn’t be surprised.”
“Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky there are no Rangers fans here.” Cam waves him off as Jack and Fran laugh. 
“What a way to meet someone for the first time,” Fran says.
“While our exes are talking for the first time in over four years?” Jack says and Fran and Cam both snort. “You could say that.”
She turns to Cam, “Cam, you can go off and mingle, you know? It’s your wedding. Jack and I will be fine here.”
Jack opens his mouth to agree but Cam just shakes his head. “It’s fine. I need a second to breathe anyways. And also make sure this doesn’t go downhill.”
“Ashley seems like a smart girl and Alex isn’t that stupid,” Fran says. “They wouldn’t make a fuss at your wedding.”
Cam sighs and Jack thinks about how thankful he is that Cam has been there for his girlfriend way before Jack even knew her. Jack then turns to Fran and asks how she and Alex met and the conversation starts there, all three of them turning to the two exes from time to time to make sure there’s no flames or glasses being thrown. 
Fran talks about how she and Alex met at work and laughs in amusement when Jack explains that it was the same with him and Ashley, talking about how Ashley had been filling in for a colleague for an interview and Jack practically fell in love with her the second he saw her and had to tell himself to not sound stupid in front of the pretty girl. 
And honestly, as Jack talks to Fran, he laughs to himself a bit ironically. She reminds him a bit of Ashley. A bit too much for him personally and harsh in a different way than his girlfriend, but decent company nonetheless. So maybe he and Alex are more alike than they think. 
Meanwhile, the conversation happening merely 20 feet away between two exes is not as casual. Not as comfortable. 
“Been a long time, huh?” Alex remarks. 
Ashley tries not to scoff. “Four years.”
Alex curses under his breath. “Yeah. How are you?”
What a loaded question. She goes along with it. “I’m good.”
“Cam mentioned you’re in New York?”
“I am. Moved out there about a year after college for work. Then went to grad school there.”
“Journalist?”
She shrugs. “More or less. The title’s changed a couple times throughout the years but all in that field.”
“That’s awesome.” He runs a hand through his hair and it looks so familiar yet unfamiliar. “I still remember when you told me you got into BU. Seems like the path was always laid out for you, huh?”
She’ll have to unpack that one later. “Guess so. How about you? I heard you were in Portland. Real estate, right?”
He nods, “Yeah.”
“That’s great. I’m really glad you’re doing well.”
“Thanks.” A moment of silence there. “For what it’s worth, it is really good to see you again.”
Ashley lets out a genuine smile. Small, but genuine. “Same.” 
The sound of his laughter kinda aches a bit, but not in a way that has her sad. Just nostalgic. There is some easy banter, and somewhere in the back of her mind, Ashley’s remembering a bit of why she loved him in the first place. 
There’s a pause in the conversation, before she continues, “I haven’t gotten a chance to meet whoever you’re here with yet, but-”
“Fran.”
“Fran, right.” she says. “But I’ve heard a bit. How long have you two been together?”
“Are we really going to do this?”
She swallows the urge to fire back, shrugging instead. “Why not? And don’t pretend like you’re not curious about Jack either. I figured I might as well just go first.”
Alex laughs. “Around three years for Fran and I.”
“You love her?”
“I do. A lot.”
She smiles. Genuinely this time. “Good. I’m glad to hear it.”
“How about you and Mr. NHL Superstar?”
Again, she swallows down her instinct to fire back. “A little over a year now.”
“You happy?”
“Very.”
Alex nods once and doesn’t quite smile but has a pleasant expression on his face. “Cam said that he likes him. Which is a lot, considering I’m pretty sure he used to think that he was a cocky asshole.”
Ashley knows it’s not meant in that way because she knows that her boyfriend has somewhat of a reputation, but she gets defensive. “People aren’t always what they seem. Even if he’s a pest on the ice sometimes, he’s a wonderful guy.” You should know, she wants to say. You were the exact same way in high school.
They’re trickling into dangerous territory. She wonders if he’ll take the bait. If he does, she wonders if she’ll be strong enough not to fall for it. She wonders if he’ll apologize, not because she needs it, but because she knows she deserved one all those years ago. 
Alex leans back casually, putting his arm over the empty chair next to him. “From me to Jack fucking Hughes. I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.”
Ashley doesn’t know at all how she’s supposed to take that. Like everything he’s always done, he says it casually, taking a drink of water as she’s figuring out how to respond. She doesn’t. For the first time, she feels like she doesn’t have control of this conversation.
He notices she has no response and keeps going. “Hey, he’s a decent player and the money can’t hurt. I’m glad you’re happy.”
She swallows. A gold digger? Is that really what he’s hinting at?
Ashley almost sighs in relief when she catches sight of Jack, Cam and a woman who she presumes is Fran walking back towards them. Immediately she plasters on a smile and introduces herself to Fran, because it’s not her fault that her boyfriend still has the ability to get under her skin even so many years after their break-up. Jack presses a rum and coke in her hand silently and she thanks him quietly before making small talk with Fran. Just having Jack next to her has her blood pressure lowering. Soon enough, they all but shove Cam back into his own wedding and bid farewell as Fran excuses her and Alex and heads over to chat with someone she doesn’t recognize. 
Jack leads her outside of the main reception hall into one of the hallways, where there are people sporadically chatting and also getting away from the music for a second. 
Jack grabs her drink and faces her with a concerned look. “Ash? You okay? It seemed to get a little…tense at times.”
Ashley shrugs and chuckles. It’s bitter though, and he knows it, immediately placing a grounding hand on her waist. “I was how I always am to everyone.”
“Sure,” he responds skeptically. 
She sighs. “It was fine. I’m fine. It didn’t go badly. I don’t know if it was good. It just…was.” She squeezes her eyes shut. “It was fine. It’s not a big deal. It’s been four fucking years and it’s not like I love him anymore. I shouldn’t-”
“Hey. Stop. None of that,” Jack says softly but firmly, leaning in closer and kissing her forehead as she bites her bottom lip harshly. He holds her hand gently and presses it against his chest. “Open your eyes, baby. Take some breaths with me.”
She obeys, looking into blue eyes that have become another home for her and taking deep breaths. “Thanks.”
“Always. Wanna talk about it?”
She debates in her mind. “No. It’s a wedding. Let’s go back and have fun and dance.”
“You sure?”
She nods, before placing a peck on his lips. “I’ll probably be more in my feelings tomorrow about it. Or the next week. But for now, come dance with me.”
“Lead the way.”
Ashley doesn’t even look at Alex’s direction for the rest of the night, instead looking at Jack when she feels like the floor beneath her is gonna get pulled away. The stupidly romantic thing is, she knows he’ll catch her everytime.
three - one year and nine months
“What do you think?”
Jack looks up from where he’s sitting on her bed and his eyes pop open, jaw dropping with it. He tosses his phone to the side. “Ash. Holy shit.”
Ashley twirls around in the yellow ruffle dress. “I like this one the most, but I don’t think it’s fancy enough.”
She looks up to see him biting his lip, eyes scanning her body. She blushes as he beckons her to stand inbetween his legs. “Don’t care. You have to wear this one, please. It fits you perfectly.”
She smoothes down the ruffles. “Are you sure it’s fancy enough?”
“Honey, most of the guys probably won’t even be wearing ties,” she settles her hands in his hair. “Wear this one. I know you love it and you look beautiful in it.”
She lets out a breath. “Okay, yeah. I can pair it with those flower earrings and matching bracelet and I think Scarlett has white heels I could borrow and-”
“Woah there,” he chuckles, rubbing his thumbs on the fabric at her hips. “Did you have too much coffee today? You’re talking a million miles a minute.”
“No,” she drawls out. “I’m just…nervous? This is the first thing we’re going to that’s so…”
“Public?” He finishes for her. She nods. He pushes her gently so that she’s sitting next to him. “I get that. I’m a bit nervous too. But I’ll be there the whole time. And you’ll have my parents and Quinn. And Nico will be there too. Besides, you’re great with people. I’ve seen you in action.”
She shrugs modestly. “That’s not what I’m worried about.”
“Then what is it you’re worried about?”
She swallows at his tone, because she doesn’t think he gets it. Why would he? He’s not the one that’s going to be scrutinized by his fans. At least not to the degree she would be. “Everyone else’s thoughts.”
Jack nods slowly in realization. He leans in to kiss her lips twice. She has to admit it makes her feel a bit better. His kisses usually do. “You know no one else’s opinions mean anything. Besides, it’s very clear to anyone that I’m happily taken.”
And he has a point. She’s made an appearance on his Instagram with two photos in his annual summer dump — one was just of her in the city and the other was of the two of them by the lake in Michigan — and he hadn’t tagged her, but it was clearly a message to the world that he wasn’t a single man. Social media doesn’t matter and it never will, but it had been a decision they both had come to, Jack approaching her gently and asking if he could post them. 
But having it through a screen and having it in real life is different. 
“I know it’s stupid,” she says. “But you know me. I don’t particularly enjoy being out of my element.”
“I know, I know,” he bumps her knee with his. “It’ll be fun though. We’ll get drunk the night before and maybe I’ll be hungover the next morning and you get to tell Luke if I do anything embarrassing.”
Ashley laughs. “That does sound fun.”
“Exactly.” He cups her face in his hands. “I gotcha, baby. Always.”
She trusts in that when she lands in Boston a few days later. She trusts in that as she gets swept in a world she’s not quite comfortable in, but finds there are a lot more similarities than differences compared to environments she’s been in. She’s a journalist after all. It’s her job in a way to blend into different lives in order to get the best and most impactful stories. She trusts in that as she’s rolling her eyes fondly at Jack, who’s chatting with practically everyone at the bar. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen this many hockey players in one room. She trusts in that as Jack then always drags whoever he’s talking to so that he can introduce her. 
For someone who has always valued their privacy, Jack is making it pretty obvious that the “stunning girl in the floral shirt” is his. Ashley can’t say she hates it, even if it’s a little bold for her particular taste. 
“He looks happy, doesn’t he?” Ellen asks as they both watch Jack across the room with Auston Matthews. Ashley’s cousins in Toronto would be freaking out right now. 
Ashley snickers. “Drunk or happy?”
“Both?” Ellen raises her glass up to knock it against Ashley’s in a toast.
“I’ll drink to that.” 
“Thank you for coming. I know it means a lot to Jack that you’re here.”
“Thank you all for having me,” Ashley responds, suddenly a bit shy. “It’s, been, uh, a bit overwhelming, to be honest.”
“I can imagine,” Ellen smiles sympathetically. “All this hockey stuff, business wise, is more Jimmy’s scene than mine.”
“Really?” Ashley thinks to all that Jack’s told her about his mother and all the warmth Ellen has emitted since they’ve met, not to mention how everyone they’ve talked to — player, coach, agent — has gravitated towards Ellen.
To her credit, Ellen chuckles. “That’s fair. Jack tells me that you know how to work a room, which is something that Jimmy’s always said about me.”
Ashley traces the rim of her glass. “I think Jack gives me too much credit.”
“I’m not sure about that,” Ellen says with a knowing smile. “I read your article the other day. The one about the family who’s had to travel across the country to get care for their child. Quinn sent it to me, actually.” Quinn read it? She doesn’t remember sending it to him. Did Jack send it to him? “It’s an incredible piece of work. How long did that take you?”
“From start to finish? Around two months.”
Ellen grins, placing a motherly hand on her shoulder. “You’re so talented, honey. I try to keep up with everything you write, but you do so much that sometimes I lose track.”
"You really don’t have to do that. But thank you, Ellen. T-that means a lot to me.” 
“What does Mom not have to do?” Jack asks, squeezing himself next to his girlfriend.
“Read my articles.”
Jack grins. “Why not? They’re so good. Our family group chat is filled with them. Dad always loves your profiles.”
Ashley swallows. She’s pretty confident that the Hughes family likes her, but the fact that they all keep track of her published articles is a bit too much for her to handle right now. She downs the rest of her beer and waves Jack away when he opens his mouth to ask if she wants his. Instead, he asks the bartender for a ginger ale. Ashley’s grateful. 
The next day, Ashley smiles as Jack’s walking the carpet. He’s up for the Hart trophy this year and as he squats down to greet a little boy and sign his jersey, Ashley can’t help but let her love and pride for him soar. She’s as out of the way as she can be, trying not to get overwhelmed with all the voices and flashes around her. It helps that Ellen and Jim seem to always be nearby and she makes fast friends with Nina and Luca, who are watching Nico do similar things. 
She gets pulled out of her own world with a familiar hand on her waist. “Hey,” Jack murmurs into her ear. 
“Hi.”
“Do you wanna jump into a few pictures with me?” Jack asks softly. “It’ll only take a few minutes. No pressure if not.”
“Uh, yeah. Sure.”
He beams, offering an arm as he leads them over to where the photographers are. She tries not to blink too much as the flashes hurt her eyes and hopes she and Jack are looking in the same direction. 
“You look beautiful,” he pairs his sincere compliment with a squeeze of her waist. 
She smiles at the cameras for a few seconds before turning to him slightly. “You already said that.”
“I know. It’s worth repeating.”
Thankfully, it’s only about 30 seconds before everyone else — Quinn, Jack’s parents and Nico’s family — are being ushered in for a group photo. She finds herself inbetween Jack and Nico and giggles as Nico tries to blow his hair out of his face. She takes pity on him after a few tries and she reaches up to fix it for him quickly, Nina laughing on the other side of her brother. 
“Stop messing with it,” Ashley scolds lightly through clenched teeth, smiling for the pictures. “You’re gonna make it worse.” She giggles when Nico pokes her side a few seconds later. 
When Jack wins the Hart, Ashley leaps out of her seat in excitement. To her, he’s always going to be the best player she knows because she sees firsthand how hard he works, but it’s nice that his peers are recognizing it too. He places a quick kiss on her lips before going up on stage and Ashley’s clapping and laughing to herself. He was dreading having to make any sort of speech. 
After the ceremony, she just follows everyone to whatever swanky rooftop seemingly the entire NHL is gathering at. She finds herself flocking towards Nina for a lot of the evening as they both exchange fun stories and memories of their own lives over drinks. Ashley thinks she could keep talking to Nina for the rest of her life. She’s just so damn cool. 
The next day, she drags Jack around the BU campus and is happy pointing out buildings that she had classes in, cried in, cheered in and lived her life in. They walk from one end of Com Ave to the other, Ashley dutifully pointing out Agganis Arena (“I’m sure Trevor has some good memories in this building”), their starting point.
She stands in front of the College of Communication building and stops. Jack dutifully stops next to her. “This building kinda looks like shit.”
Ashley snorts. “Yeah, I know. Especially compared to all the science buildings.” She bites her lip. “It all started here.”
“What did?”
“The dream.”
And yeah, maybe that’s a bit dramatic. But Jack said similar things when he brought her to Toronto earlier this year, so she knows he understands. 
Almost two years together now, she’s convinced that no one will really ever understand her like Jack does. 
He nudges her hip with his, the breeze blowing comfortably through her hair and rustling the plants around them. They watch as a student walks through the front doors. “Wanna go in?” 
She shakes her head. “Nah, I’m good.” She tugs at his hand while sipping the lavender lemonade from Pavement in the other. “Come on. I’ll show you Bay State. I lived there my junior year after I came back from studying abroad in Dublin.”
Bay State Road is beautiful as always in the Boston summer, Ashley’s hand in Jack’s. She drags him out into the middle of the road and only squeals once when a car is coming and he pulls her to the sidewalk. 
Campus isn’t the same when classes aren’t in session, but she hopes Jack can still feel some of the magic in the air through her stories. 
“It suits you.”
She turns to Jack. “Hm?”
“This city. It suits you.”
“Oh,” she blushes for some reason. “Thanks.”
“Do you miss it here?”
“All the time,” Ashley admits. “New York is great, but Boston will always be home.”
“Would you think of working here? If given the option?” Jack asks. 
“Maybe,” Ashley squeezes Jack’s hand, “But I also have reasons to stay in New York.”
He smirks, but it quickly transitions into something gentler. “Yeah?”
She could throw something snarky back at him, but she looks around the brownstones and lets out a deep breath. This is home, but flashes of Hoboken and East Village flicker in her mind and that’s also home. 
She looks at Jack and feels overwhelmed. Oh. It’s Boston. It’s Hoboken. It’s East Village. It’s him. Jack is home.
four - two years
“Big day, huh?” 
Ashley just smiles at Carissa, nudging her side. “We’ve come a long way since that phone call at 2 a.m.”
Carissa just snorts. “That phone call got us here.”
“True,” Ashley squeezes her arm as they make their way to their assigned table. “Love you, girly.”
“Love you more. I’m proud of us.”
Ashley grins, looking around as everyone is mingling amongst each other. There are past award winners here and Ashley’s already done some of her internal fangirling, especially when Lynsey Addario came up to her and wanted to talk to her. 
She’s still decently new in this industry and knows she has so much to learn, but it’s comforting to see that all of her hard work has paid off. 
People are starting to take their seats and Ashley looks around at her colleagues. Everyone’s dressed up and looks so lovely and Ashley smiles, looking down at her midnight blue dress. When Jack had seen her walk out of the changing room in it a few weeks ago, his eyes had popped out. 
(“Fuck,” he had said. “Now I’m even more pissed I can’t make it to the dinner.”)
And yeah, it would be nice if he was here. But the Devils are playing the Islanders tonight. It sucks that he’s so close but so far away, but after two years now, it’s just part of the gig. And they make it work. So Ashley isn’t too upset about it, even if Jack is. 
She’s a bit confused when there is an empty seat next to her, as it seems like the ballroom is filled. There’s no nametag there either, but her attention soon drifts off to the front. She has to bite her lip to stop herself from smiling too hard. 
The Pulitzer Prize Awards Ceremony at Columbia University, also her alma mater in a way. Her 18-year-old-self who was sitting in the front row of Introduction to Journalism in Boston could’ve only dreamed about this day. 
Opening remarks start and Ashley really does try to listen, but her eyes glaze over as her mind drifts off. She claps as the first few awards are being presented. She thinks about all the hours that it took to get this piece down, but also all the hours before — in her classes, at her college paper, in her internships, during her job search. The times she wanted to throw in the towel and just do something else. Anything else.  
“I didn’t miss too much, did I?” She blinks, turning to the voice next to her. She freezes. 
“Jack?” She breathes out. She hasn’t been sleeping much this week, so this could very well be a hallucination. 
He beams and she reaches to place her hand on his cheek and she realizes as she scans her eyes up and down.  Oh. He’s in her favorite suit of his. And he’s here. 
“Oh my god,” she wraps her arms around his neck as her whole table cheers. Thankfully, there’s a lull in the ceremony where the whole room is blanketed in a low buzz. “What the f-don’t you have a game?”
“Technically,” Jack says, nodding at her coworkers with a charming smile. “Took a personal day.”
“What? You can do that?”
“Yeah,” he shrugs, like he didn’t just skip a game to be here. He rubs his thumb on her shoulder as he kisses her temple. “This is a huge deal, baby. I wasn’t gonna miss it. I’m so proud of you.”
“Lindy’s not mad? Nico’s not mad?”
Jack snorts. “The second you won, I told Lindy to count me out for the game so he can do what he wants with that. Nico’s lowkey pissed he also can’t be here.” He turns to Carissa on the other side and beams. “Hey Care. Congrats.”
“Thanks, Jack,” Carissa beams. “Surprised you pulled this off.”
“Surprised we pulled this off.”
Ashley looks at Carissa. “You knew about this?”
“Of course. Who do you think made sure he would have a seat?”
She looks between her colleague and her boyfriend. Something creeps up her throat that feels a lot like love. 
When her and Carissa are recognized and they have to go up to accept the award and give a short speech, it’s kinda a blur. All she remembers is Jack’s kiss on her cheek and receiving a standing ovation as she and Carissa walk up together. So many hours with her eyes glazed over glaring at the laptop. So many hours interviewing with people and reconfirming facts. So many hours dedicated to this one piece. 
She wouldn’t have it any other way. 
As Carissa is speaking, she locks eyes with Jack. He’s beaming and his eyes are actually sparkling. His hair tousled and he’s so handsome and he’s hers. 
(She almost trips walking back to him) 
He chuckles, pulling her into another tight hug. “You’re amazing, baby. Congratulations.”
“Thank you,” she chokes out. “Thank you for calming me down all the times I was freaking out.”
“Of course. I’m sure all those glasses of cold water helped,” he jokes. She always said the ice cold water he would place next to her laptop would wake up her brain. 
She laughs into his shoulder. “They did.”
He pulls away and just stares at her, smile still on his face. Their attention is taken away by someone who wants to congratulate Ashley and has no recognition on their face when looking at Jack. 
(Jack looks on with pride)
plus one - three years and four months
Stanley Cups are interesting. Even some of the best athletes of all time have never gotten one. And some that are only slightly above average perhaps were just placed on the right team in the right season. 
But this Stanley Cup, in Ashley’s completely unbiased opinion, this one was fully deserved. By every single person on the team. 
She doesn’t think she’ll ever forget the absolute joy in Nico’s eyes as he lifted the cup in the air to a roaring crowd at The Rock, or how long the hug between Jack and Luke was when the final whistle sounded, or seeing Ellen cry as her two sons beckoned her in for a picture with the cup, her other son and husband standing close by with pride in their eyes. 
The picture of her and Jack by the cup as he’s kissing her cheek as she smiles so widely her eyes are shut might be her favorite picture of them of all time. 
Ashley had wondered if Jack was going to bring the cup to Toronto or Michigan. He ended up bringing it to Toronto while Luke brought it to Michigan. It ended up being all the same, since they were both present at both. 
Jack winning the Cup is obviously a huge celebration. But he’s not the only one with something to celebrate.
Yesterday, when they were out to lunch with some of his extended family, Ashley had found out by phone that she was just promoted to be a director of her team. After her phone call, she had just covered her mouth in shock as she sat down on a nearby bench. It wasn’t until a few minutes later when a concerned Jack came up to her and asked what was wrong, before she told him and he smothered her face in kisses. 
The parade around his pseudo-hometown is absolutely insane. Ashley doesn’t even know how she has a voice by mid-afternoon, much less how Jack has one considering that he’s been yelling all day. At some point, she forces him to sit down and chug a giant water bottle. 
But she can’t overthink too hard. Her phone’s filled with pictures of Jack with his loved ones and she just feels proud. 
Some of Jack’s extended family who still live in the area offered their home to host a party that night with just friends and family. Ashley did all she could to help prepare, which included coming over to decorate the night before and parking herself in the kitchen the second they got there to offer a helping hand. Well, she tried, before every single person pushed her away and insisted she go join the celebrations. 
She finds herself in a long, in-depth conversation with one of Jack’s younger cousins who’s thinking about working in media when she notices it suddenly becomes quiet. Suddenly, the light flickers off and Ashley is confused.
Jack then walks in with a circular cake with candles lit paired with his beautiful smile. Ashley blinks in confusion as everyone’s eyes fall on her and before she can ask what the hell is going on, Luke bounds over to her and swings an arm around her shoulder, shaking her. 
“Congrats on your promotion, Ash!” Luke exclaims. 
Her mouth drops open and she looks around as everyone in the room cheers and shouts out their congratulations. She chuckles in shock as Jack walks closer. And then suddenly, all she can focus on is him. 
“What are you doing?” She whispers, suddenly wanting to cry. 
“Come on,” he says with the softest smile. “You didn’t think I’d just keep the news to myself, did you?”
“But this is your day,” she chokes out. 
“My day. Your day. It’s all the same, eh?” Jack nods at the candles. “Hurry up. My arms are getting tired.”
A watery laugh from her before she blows out the candles at everyone’s cheers. Jack places the cake on a nearby table before smothering her in a tight hug. Ashley’s heart could burst right now at the love she feels from the people in the room and the person in her arms. She gets a chance to really look at the cake, which is white and sage with “Congratulations Jack and Ashley!” in beautiful script at the center. The lights turn back on and Quinn’s the first one who comes up to hug her. As Ellen is giving Ashley a kiss on the cheek, she sees Jack over Ellen’s shoulder, smiling at her. 
She swallows as she pulls away, before glancing at the ring on her left finger. Ashley’s never let herself want much in her life. But if someone asked her what she wants with her life, she would just place them in this room. Right here. Right now. 
(They cut the cake together. Ashley feels a buzzing joy throughout her bones)
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aliamor · 4 months
Note
the only person I have request ideas for is Case, so sorry, but I was thinking about Case with an s/o who matches his energy and attitude × 100? thank you :)
That is totally okay, ill write about anyone but case is my favorite to write about so this is perfect:))
𖦹 being with case is never a dull moment, both give sass to eachother in the daily and whenever one of you is excited about something or about to beat a game for the first time, etc. the other will give that same energy back.
𖦹 “nah dont come over to me with them sauce filled lips” you tell him once hes finishes eating ramen noddles
𖦹 once you were playing climbing Mt. Everest with caseoh and half way up caseoh feel and all you could hear throughg your headphones was “NOOOUH!” from caseoh and your voice laughs out saying “mountain everest just formed a crack in it omg imma get sucked in”.
𖦹 caseoh also HATES when he cant get water/ oxygen in climbing mountains everest so you with run around it with your character and block him from getting any and you will hear his forks banging around from him getting pissed
𖦹 when caseoh opens fanmail and you are on stream with him, one time you bought him something and on the note its says in big letter ‘please do not eat me!!!’
𖦹 as you guys date/ know eachother you both pick up on the same slang. So its a never ending sass battle with you two.
𖦹 case wanted to have you play the backrooms for his stream once and a creature was chasing you and both of you yelled “HES ON MY CHEEKS!”
𖦹some times case will accidentally say a word that is a food and from the other room you will yell “ OFC” or he will say “chat im so skinny, its crazy” and you will reply “like a stick, you pushing 118 right now”
𖦹 when you and case go shopping together and he will mess around with you and you went into the toy section just for fun and finding a fake spider, case hates spiders so you put it on his shoulder and before you could even back away he whipped the spider off of his shoulders and it hit the ground.
MWAH,
I literally couldn’t think right for this one so hopefully this will work, but i love writing these so keep them coming:))
BUFF CASEOH 😻🙈
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no-m4gic · 2 years
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Hiya friend i saw u and knew I had to request heh
So I was thinking byakuya/nagito/shuichi characters w a reader who cries when frustrated/yelled at/someone angry at them :}
Lots of love also don't forget to eat and drink
mmm i'm here to pleasure the simps i'm here to pleasure the simps i'm here to pleasure the simps.
lmk if you ever want yandere byakuya, plasma /j
i had fun writing this lel, thanks for requesting! i relate to this a lot lmao
~ mod sitaya
BYAKUYA, NAGITO & SHUICHI W/ A GN FRAGILE S/O
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BYAKUYA TOGAMI
"uugh. stop crying already, get up, the floor's dirty."
despite byakuya not being a patient guy, he isn't a loud one either. however that doesn't mean he won't get mad and snap at you.
he isn't a heartless monster though, if you'd just been scolded by perhaps kirigiri or ishimaru, he'd offer you his handkerchief, but i doubt he'll accept it back.
"i don't want anything that is stained with plebian tears."
isn't really the type who'd hug or like hugs, but if you do initiate a hug, he'll just awkwardly and silently hug back.
god forbid you stain his rich people clothes though.
don't worry about him being mad at you, you're one of the only people who doesn't piss him off to the core, so it's rare for him to be mad or upset with you, most of the time it's just him being annoyed and making snarky remarks.
if it was somebody who had made you mad, frustrated or upset, expect a handwritten apology letter from them.
when you ask togami about it, he'd act all innocent and clueless.
"i don't know what you're talking about s/o, i'd never do something like that for such a plebian."
NAGITO KOMAEDA
"oh atua- s/o- what happened? was it me? i'm sorry... i'll leave if you want..."
at first he'd think he was the problem and feel like absolute shit.
eventually tho, he'll find out that it isn't him, which was good on his part.
he'd ask you what happened and who made you upset.
after you're done rambling, you'll find yourself in his arms, him probably squeezing you tighter than you were squeezing him.
my guy doesn't want to lose you.
while hugging you and rubbing your back, he assumes that this happened because of his luck. he'd also be secretly plotting something against whoever yelled at you. it would definitely be something way less sinister than whatever was happening in his head, something like him acting all creepy around them.
if you're still upset, he'd bring you on a shopping spree, since you know like... he won the lottery.
if you run into someone like izuru or byakuya, you two would definitely have fun annoying them.
SHUICHI SAIHARA
"oh no- s/o, i'm sorry that happened... but what should i do? should i start crying too?"
if it'd make you feel better, shuichi would offer to cry with you and hold you.
he'd quickly run off to fetch you a glass of water
after that he'd listen to whatever you had to say, all the while enjoying your soothing voice.
if you like sulking in the dark, he'll lend you his emo hat and walk you back to your room, telling people who got in the way and were making the situation worse to fuck off.
if it's raining and you guys are outside, he'll walk in the rain and lend you his umbrella.
you'd probably have to care for him after he gets a bad fever
after dealing with you, the next person he'll have to deal with would be your attacker.
he wouldn't attack them komaeda or blackmail them like togami, he'd just walk up to them and be like "hey, could you be more careful around s/o next time? their ego is really weak. thanks."
or he'd get kaede to tell them if he decides to stay with you.
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workingbynyx · 2 months
Text
Words I Held Back — Gojo Satoru x GN!Reader
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× :: summary — satoru is gone and sukuna remains victorious while you had to stay on the sidelines, however, a note managed to find its way into your pocket– what could it be?
× :: pairing — gojo satoru x gn!reader
× :: genre — angst, oneshot
× :: warning (s) — some ooc and oos instances!
× :: a/n — aaaand we're back in the game after months of disappearing 😎 hey folks! i'm gonna have to start yall off with a recent hyperfixation of mine (aka jjk) about our glorious blue eyed king 🙏🏻 this is my first time writing some angst and about anime, so apologies in advance! i'm also sorry if this was pretty short :<
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now that satoru was gone, you felt as if a big part of your soul was gone too. it didn't feel real, it didn't feel possible but sukuna managed to do the impossible. you were angry at yourself, you should've been there with him— everyone should've been. you were in complete shock, you wanted to blame yourself but there was no time to even mourn the loss of satoru gojo, you had to help shoko with other injured people that needed your assistance.
tears wouldn't stop falling down your cheeks, they all fell on their own thinking about him alone. you worked on patching up sorcerers although they couldn't help but notice how stained with tears your face was while you cleaned their wounds in a blank expression. you never bothered to wipe them on your own since new patients are coming in every second, you had to put them first before yourself.
eventually, you stood up to get yourself a nice cup of tea to calm your nerves. however, you felt a piece of paper in the depths of your pocket when you placed your hands in them. you carefully fished it out and noticed a something written in them. you gasped under your breath when you realized who it's from...
"y/n, it's satoru.
if you're seeing this then that probably means i'm in shinjuku right now~ i wrote this letter for you to read since i know how anxious you get in serious missions that involved special grades. i also wanted to write this letter because, well, i've been meaning to tell you something for a while now actually. these are the words i held back, y/n. i never had the guts to tell you in person so this is probably the only reasonable way of letting you know. you've always been the source of my motivation to keep going, you kept my world spinning even if it was slowly caving in towards me. you made me realize how much my worth is as a person... as my self, and i'd like to thank you for that.
right now, i'm fighting in that city for everyone. i wouldn't be able to forgive myself if i died on that field and leave you like that without any further explanation, i'm really sorry. but at least i died knowing i've fought and gave my all for the person i love earnestly. i remember when we were still first years and you've only then discovered your true cursed technique with me, you were so happy. i fell in love with you right there and then. i didn't think it would be possible for somebody like me to develop these feelings for you, i didn't want to admit it because i know i wasn't strong enough yet to protect you. i thought i needed to prove myself first to be worth of your love, but i realized that i already was even if i didn't. that was foolish of me, wasn't it? hahaha
i guess i was also scared, most of the people i loved are always harmed or endangered, so all i really wanted was to keep you safe in this cruel world, free from danger like me. love is the most twisted curse of them all, but here i am completely bewitched by you. whatever our fate may be, i only wish for your happiness to be found— even if it's not with me. you probably already know what i'm about to tell you but you always forget (dumbass !) sleep on time, eat on time and remember that you're the strongest.. second after me though of course :P
let's talk when i get back!
— g. s. "
you completely broke down by the end, sinking onto the floor on your knees as tears slowly stained the paper. your heart shattered into pieces like glass when everything finally caught up to you, why must the world be so cruel? nanami, haibara, suguru, and now satoru. one by one, everyone is being taken from you without any reason why other than beastly curses being bloodthirsty for murder and power. satoru deserved to live longer away from constant danger, he deserved the happiness that was ripped from him a long time ago.
the both of you could've lived a wonderful life together, but all of that was gone in a flash.
"satoru... i didn't k-know... i'm really sorry" you muttered under your breath, your nails digging into the skin of your thigh. your hands then came up towards your face in attempt to muffle your sobbing. shaking hands, silent cries and heavy tears falling, the folded letter abandoned in front of you as guilt slowly consumed you inside.
from that day on, gojo satoru was dead.
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vanilladove · 1 year
Note
This request is a bit long and specific but I hope that's not a problem efvevefvrgb I'm sorry
So if that's not a problem I would want headcanons for gn reader who is Atsushi's sibling (a year older), has the same ability and also is in ADA and is in love with Akutagawa and he hates them at first but then fall in love. Also reader has very similar personality to Atsushi. (I know, readers description is almost Atsushi, I kin him okay tgbrbrgbrbg 😭)
So fluffy sibling headcanons with Atsushi, romantic (and suggestive/nsfw if thats okay (I'm 19)) headcanons with Akutagawa and also headcanons about dynamics between reader, Akutagawa and Atsushi.
I'm sorry that it's so specific rtgefbefbefg And thank you in advance if you'll write this erfefvvejad ♡
hihi tysm for being my first request, anon! this is actually so cute ahhhhh :,) i felt like keeping this pretty fluffy. engagement is always appreciated (from anyone & everyone:D)! thank you guys for all the support + requests so far ♡
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pic creds luvpngs
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ pairing: akutagawa x nakajima!gn!reader
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ genre: fluff + a lil suggestive (hickeys)
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ content warnings: none!
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₊˚⊹♡ being siblings with atsushi...
Since you're a year older, you've always been quite protective over your younger brother. Despite having very similar personalities, you're a bit more rational and street-smart than Atsushi.
You made him his first ever ochazuke (green tea over rice) at the orphanage one day to celebrate his birthday, and since then it's been his favorite food ♡
You cheer him up a lot and are kind of like his strength:,) After the kids at the orphanage cut his hair, you convinced him it looked cute and yelled at them to never mess with him again.
You always keep extra tissues on you for him bc he’s a lil crybaby sometimes :(
Both of you train together since you have the same ability. Luckily, neither of you are super competitive, so you both are at the same skill level.
You both share one brain cell...
₊˚⊹♡ being akutagawa's lover...
You fell first, but he fell harder :D
The first time you saw Akutagawa, you were enamoured by his beauty. Unfortunately, the feeling wasn't reciprocated since he held a grudge against you and Atsushi (*cough* bc of Dazai bragging*cough*).
Dazai sent you to negotiate with the Port Mafia on behalf of the ADA once, and you saw him again in a meeting. Higuchi was gone, so naturally you sat next to Akutagawa--much to his dismay.
He was side-eyeing you harshly the entire meeting until his lung decided to act up and send him into a coughing fit...
You gave him your untouched cup of tea and fished some cough drops out of your pocket (always prepared bc you're the older sibling lol). This surprised him (along with the other Mafia members).
He didn't have the luxury of declining, so he took them without thanking you and stubbornly looked away (you swore you saw a faint blush on his cheeks though...)
After the meeting, he pulled you aside and demanded to know your favorite café, so he could take you there, warning you, "don't get the wrong idea, I just don't want to owe you". (he's awkward ik :,) )
Somehow your little 'dates' went back and forth as you kept bringing him more things to ease his condition (handkerchiefs, tea w/ honey, medicine, etc.)
Akutagawa fell for your bubbly personality and giving nature (which he would've regarded as weak before). As much as he didn't want to admit it, it was nice to have someone take care of and genuinely look out for him. It's the reason why he secretly hopes he'll never stop 'owing' you.
His love language is quality time and writing you poems/love letters. Anytime he isn't working or with Gin, he spends with you. His go-to is a romantic moonlight walk by the ocean (he def hates water tho and refuses to even dip his feet in--black cat energy hehe)♡
Expect a lot of subtle affirmations from Akutagawa. Not many “i love you”s but a lot of “the moon looks beautiful tonight, doesn’t it?”
Also lots of affectionate head bonks hehe.
SUPER POSSESSIVE!!! Will constantly hold you/your hand when you're alone together or out in public and leaves hickeys to show you're his.
One time Atsushi saw one on your neck and asked about it...you told him it was "from Akutagawa", and he immediately got defensive thinking he'd hurt you. You awkardly laughed and told him it was a "hickey". Poor, innocent Atsu asked Dazai what that was and obviously Dazai's evil ass explained it in the worst, most suggestive way possible :p Afterwards, Atsushi wouldn't look at either of you for a week...
₊˚⊹♡ dynamics between the three of you...
Although at first Akutagawa refused to hang out with Atsushi, he began to tag along more after you expressed that it made you sad to leave him out. When they did fight, you were the middleman breaking it up.
Akutagawa has been nicer to Atsushi lately--scoffing at his jokes instead of clapping back, claiming "it's for your sake and definitely not by choice".
Nicknames! You call Akutagawa "Ryu" when you're alone together. Aku calls you by your name but still refers to Atsushi as 人虎 "Jinko". Tried to call Atsushi by his name once, but it felt wrong, so he never did it again lol.
Dazai likes to tease that you guys are "Triple Black". You're a powerful trio, and you often strategize and provide support to the other two.
Since you guys are so similar, you once asked Akutagawa why he liked you so much but couldn't stand Atsushi...
Mans was absolutely dumbfounded. The question made him realize it was because he loved you, but he couldn't bring himself to admit it flat out. The thought of that made his face red like a tomato. He was so flustered, he couldn't even think of a cute, poetic thing to say.
He brought you close to him in a hug to try and hide his crimson face, burying himself into your neck.
"Your haircut isn't stupid like his, that's all".
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thegoober010 · 6 months
Note
BOO!! Did i scare you :3
I LOVEDDD THE LAST ONESHOT JT WAS SO CUTE IM GOING CRAZY GOING FERAL
ANYWHOOO i hope your day has gone well!!! Make sure youve eaten and youve drank water!!! Ill know if you havent 👁️👁️ /j
BUT I HAVE A REQUEST. As always. Whos surprised. *theres no sound but a few crickets chirping and someone yelling “GET OFF THE STAGE”*
But basically its Shane x reader who is his secret admirer, like he’s been getting letters from them and he doesnt know who its from. And reader is usually kinda sarcastic towards him so he doesnt think its them UNTIL he sees them writing something down like a grocery list or something and recognizes the handwriting immediately.
It can be a oneshot OR headcanons, I don’t mind :)
SOSOSO SORRY IF THIS IS TO SPECIFIC. I just have. So many thoughts. THANK YOU IN ADVANCE!!!
-🐾
OH MY- I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BLOG WHAT THE SCALLOP
IM SORRY SM YALL IM FINALLY BACK THO FOR A BIT MWEHEHEHEH
ALSO IM SO SORRY FOR MY ABSENCE IMA DO SOME HEADCANONS CUZ LIKE IM RLLY BUSY RN AND NEED TO FINISH HOMEWORK BUT IMA FINISH THIS FIRST!! GRAAAA ITS GONNA BE PRETTY SHORT THO SORRY BOOKIE :<!!!
gender neutral reader as usual <3!!
TW/CW -> none! Just some swearing but- wtv!
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"All my emotions feel like explosions when you are around"
Honestly he always enjoyed your company, of course at first he was rather grouchy (and an asshole) whenever you were near him. Always giving you a scowl or rolling his eyes when he saw you getting near him, but he slowly started to get used to your company. What!? It's not like he enjoyed your company! Of course not! What a foolish though. (sarcasm)
He got more used to your company, allowing you to be seen more often near him but he was still not used to the gifts you'd give him. He understood it was so he could be more comfortable around you and be more friendly but he wasn't really used to getting gifts. But he didn't really think anything of it
After a while of you two hanging out more often, you both were always seen together, so much to the point people asked if you were dating which of course you both said no, but you both didn't seem uncomfortable with the idea whenever asked... Anyways.. Shane always came over to your farm where you'd always give him a nice meal and a very small amount of beer (each time he came over you'd reduce the amount of beer given and slowly start getting him to drink more water to try and help with his addiction, you'd also regularly listen to him through these meals about any of his problems and in turn he'd listen back) and you two would just chill, watch TV, play some games or go out and fool around!
After a good 4 months though he started to get strange notes... he didn't bother reading them at first until he noticed a word that quickly grabbed his attention, 'love'. He was honestly indifferent towards the letters, he didn't really care for them until he started to get them more and more often. It was rather confusing as he started getting all these letters all of a sudden, and not just any letters but love letters! It was a bit overwhelming to be honest, he never knew anyone would feel such a way towards him, not like he cared much..at first, after a while though he started to wonder who liked him and he even wondered if.. maybe he started to grow attracted to the person just through these letters!
Once you were with him he told you about the letters and even showed them to you, your face turned red and you immediately left him all confused as you wouldn't answer any of his questions on why you were as red as a damn tomato. He never really got his answer for a while. Due to your sarcastic nature you kept on teasing him about the notes and whenever he asked you questions like, "Who do you think it is?" or things of that sort you'd always roll your eyes and just go "oh I wonder who!" in a monotone voice, leaving him a bit confused.
After a while the letters started to die down, but that doesn't mean they got any less romantic, no, in fact I'd say they had even more romance talk than ever! They started to allude to the fact that the anonymous sender of these messages will confess soon, often reading "P.S lots of love, and I promise I'll see you soon <3!" or things to that nature
To be honest he actually started to look forward to these notes, although he found them a bit creepy at first or boring he started to get rather happy? The thought of someone liking him romantically so much to the point they send him love letters and admirer notes was sweet to him in a sense?
One day he randomly went to your farm and barged into your home, you know like how best friends do. He grabbed a few drinks from your fridge as he watched you make a grocery list. You were humming a soft tune while Shane's eyes got wider and wider as he saw you write. He spit out his drink causing you to stare at him strangely. "Shane! The hell dude? You alright?" You'd ask and he just stared at you like '😲'
You look at him like 'wtf?? you okay???' and he just wipes off the juice on his chin and helps clean up the spilt juice. His ears and cheeks were turning red as he did so, covering his mouth and stifling a nervous/awkward laugh.
"Your handwriting... I recognized it from the notes." he says quickly and you just go from "what??" to "WHAT" very quickly, absolutely shocked he could figure it out so easily from such a small detail!. You both stayed in awkward silence for a good 3 minutes as he helped clean.
He let out a cough and just quickly ruffled your hair and looked away "Don't worry.. I like you too.. the letters are uh nice too by the way.." is all he says. You both stay in an awkward silence for another good 5 minutes
After the awkwardness you both have a good talk and decide LETS MAKE IT OFFICIAL!! Yall both like eachother! Yall both wanna be together! So like why not!?!??! And oh wow he is one of the best boyfriends you've ever had :)!
He tries his best to improve his flaws, he knows he's not the best person and he's willing to change not just for himself but for you too, he wants to feel better about who he is now that he has you and he wants you to see him as who he wants to be as well.
You both plan out lots of activities together while dating and such, both of you are pretty much inseparable and no one is surprised you two started dating :)! (I FEEL LIKE MAKING SHANE BF HEADCANONS NOW OMG-)
For your guys' anniversary what he does is make you a letter and sends it with flowers, usually signing it 'secret admirer' and at the bottom he puts a little 'P.S it's actually your bf' just so that you don't get uncomfortable thinking it might be someone else lmao
You get really embarrassed when he brings up the fact you wrote him secret love letters and sent them to him, you thought it was a little cringe of you to do and it made you seem weird, but to him it was rather sweet, he loved it. From time to time he asks you to make some if you're comfortable with since the letters always made his day when he read them everyday! they made him feel better about himself :)!
..
bonus - > (definitely the little spoon when cuddling ANYWAYS.)
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gojosmovingcastle · 6 months
Text
last love - satosugu
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☄. *. ☄⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚⋆☄. *. ☄☄. *. ☄⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚⋆☄. *. ☄
Satoru sat perched on the bumper of Y/n's car. The two of them had finally made it to the edge of the grassy planes - where Satoru would leave the memories of his long love to venture off with someone he now considered a sister. It was too dangerous for him to venture further with the possible defenses the world of curses had put up. They were too close to the end to risk it.
Earlier the two were smiling, but now by the fire Satoru sat on the ground, leaning on the back of the car with warn parchment in his hand. 
After the long talk with Y/n the other night he figured he should give Suguru a chance to air out his open thoughts - just in case his fears came true. Yet, nothing was coming to mind as his eyes travelled further down the pages. He had so much he wanted to say back, and now he was left with a silent head and shaking hands.
"Just scream, what you wish you could have said - it's not like you are going to send it." Y/n suggested as she drove to the open field where his last thoughts of Suguru would lay - or so he hoped.
Dearest Lover,
Once you read this I will be long forgotten, 
Satoru looked toward Y/n as her laugh filled the dark scene as she spoke with Nanami or Shoko over the phone, making a smile fall on his face.
hopefully not by all, but I know by most.
I know you may never forgive me for what has happened over the course of the last handful of years - but know I did it to keep the ones I love safe. While that may be hard for you to believe - open rebelion was the only option I had. 
I have tried to write this letter numerous times over the past year, but each time I start I cannot finish. I am pained to say you were right - I am a coward when it comes to our friends, and when I am faced with you most of all. 
You were also right when you said that you were everything I wanted to be. Though, your belief in why was skewed. You were everything I wanted to be - not for myself, but for others. You rebelled on your own beliefs, my silent rebellion was for the beliefs of others. The belief that Nanami could return to his parents with open arms. The belief were Haibara could be with his family once again. The belief where...I could attend our wedding without putting the two of us in danger. The belief that one day Y/n could be safe in the world she loves. 
I know you think I am selfish, and I understand why as over the years my theatre mask was tied just a little too well. And I can not blame you for not wanting to take the step to loosen it - you had yourself to worry about, and I am afraid if I did not leave on our sixteenth birthday I would not have a lover to write this letter too. 
I admired you from the start, Satoru. I know many told you differently, but you were my first form of light. My first love, and my last.
I am sorry we could not be together today peacefully. But know that there is not a day that goes by where I do not pray to the stars for your safety. 
I love you, Satoru.
Eternally,
S. Geto
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axcel-lucci · 1 year
Note
Reader going on a little date with Law? You can use whatever type of prompt you’d like.💙
First date
Trafalgar Law x fem!reader
A/N: sorry if it took a bit of time since I am currently busy with my school and all that lol, also, I have never been to a date to I don't know exactly what happens there, I hope you like this!
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Law could feel himself pace around his office all day, he claimed he was thinking, no he was not.
Internally, he was panicking.
He knows that any time soon he'd have to ask his crush, as childish as it sounds, out on a date... Or else someone will do it before him.
Shachi then bursted inside the room to tell him that they've arrived at an island only to pause when he saw his own captain's look of disarray and panic.
"What's wrong?" He asked as he closed the door behind him before walking up to law making him sigh heavily and lean against the desk.
"It's just..." Law rambled
"Wait... Are you finally thinking of asking her out??" Shachi seemed more excited than Law, "oh my fucking-- you should've told me sooner! Let me grab penguin, just a sec!"
Shachi ran out leaving Law to stare at the now wide open door, kind of amused and surprised he's more excited.
Soon, he came back with penguin and closed the door
"Shachi filled me in... Law, this is your chance! We're in a very lovely island!" Penguin explained, "I heard through the vents that (y/n) LOVES tropical islands. Why don't you bring her to a restaurant tonight?"
"Through... The vents?" Law mumbled
"Okay I may be a little bit eavesdropping but hey, it's to our advantage, right??" Penguin huffed
"Law, quick! Let's go out and buy her flowers and some delicious chocolates!" Shachi said, pulling on Law's arm
"That won't sway her. Sure the flowers would be lovely, but it would just wilt and die..." Law muttered under his breath
It made the two pause, "hmm... How will you ask her out... Though?" Shachi hummed to himself, thinking.
"Oh, I know! Why won't you write a letter to her? We'll let it slip to her and pretend we don't know so she can read it with us!" Penguin suggested
Law hummed a bit, "I guess that could work... And what, at the end I'll ask her to go out with me and meet me at a specific place if she likes me back?"
"Yes!" The two said in unison
It made law sigh and groan internally, but inside... He's grateful to have friends like these two. For all their idiotic personalities, he still appreciated how they look after him, stay loyal to him, and even die for him.
Law pulls out a neat sheet of paper and starts to write before feeling the glares behind him making him shiver and embarrassed, "s-stop doing that! Get out of here! I need peace to write!" He flustered making the two chuckle and laugh before leaving to stand outside the door
It made him sighs before smiling, still thankful how they wanted to help him out of free will.
And after a few minutes of drafts and corrections, he finally sealed his heartfelt letter into an envelope, strictly addressed to (y/n) as he walked out and saw the two standing by the door.
"Here... Don't read it, alright?" Law huffed as he hands the letter to the two who kept snickering
"Say, captain..."
'here it goes... The teasing...' law thought
"If (y/n) and you managed to become a thing, don't forget our help and treat us to at least some drinks!" Shachi huffed
"Fine... Just... Tell me how she reacted to the letter, alright?" Law said as the two nodded and excitedly left, though he wasn't too relieved that it was done.
He had set that they were to meet at the island's park two days from now, maybe around sundown, letting him go and look around the island itself and familiarise himself so that he could see where he could take (y/n) to.
The day finally arrived, Law had dressed to his best casual outfit.
A black button up polo with the top part being slightly unbuttoned, his jeans, and left his fluffy hat, as well as his sword, on the sub.
Though he kept a small pebble in his pocket just in case.
He held a small boquet of flowers in his trembling hands as he sat on one of the benches, staring into nothing whole hopefully convincing himself that she'd arrive, that she would come.
When it was time for their meet up, he couldn't help but be swallowed by anxiety and slight fear that she may not show up, or if she read theetter at all.
He started to sweat out of nervousness
"Law!" He heard a familiar voice call him, making him immediately turn his head towards the voice, only to then find himself with an open mouth and the ability to stare without blinking.
There she was, in the prettiest casual dress he's ever seen that was worn by her, an off shoulder floral dress that stopped by her knees and some white sandals to match the look.
All he could do was stand up to greet her as she walked up to him
"I received your letter and..." She trailed off, "and... I like you too, law." She smiled gently yet sweetly making him melt.
"O-oh... Oh! Uh... H-here..." Law muttered as he hands her the bouquet of flowers he bought, "i-i thought... Uh... It fits your dress..." He muttered awkwardly
She smiled softly as she takes the flowers from him, their hands brushing ever so slightly, "is... This your first date?"
"I... Ugh... Yeah... Sorry it's just... I'm just nervous... Is all... I mean-!" Law sputtered with a slight blush
It made her chuckle softly, "it's okay... It's... My first time too, and I feel very nervous... I thought you were joking but no you didn't...! And... I'm glad... So does that mean we're...?" She explains and asks.
Law could feel himself warm up as his heart started pumping more and more against his chest, "y-yes... We're... Dating now... And this is our first date..." He said, still not too sure if he was dreaming or not, "a-anyway... I have a reanged for us some things for tonight, I hope you like it..."
"How will I know if it hasn't happened yet...?" She smiled once more with a slight head tilt
'fuck! She's so damn cute!' he though before breathing slowly to calm his heart, "okay... Uh... T-this way to the restaurant..." He said as he leads the way for the both of them.
The whole night, Law knew it was too good to be true to the point he cherished this dream, he didn't know they shared so many interests, making him fall for her more.
And as the night ended, they were walking back to the sub, hand in hand, laughing.
At this point, Law didn't care if it was a dream or not. He just knows that she's his now... And he is hers...
They walked into the now quiet sub, walking down the hall as Law stopped by her door, waiting for her to get in before leaving, but before she does, she needs to tell him something;
"Thank for this evening, Law... I enjoyed it... I loved it..." She smiled, "I hope there are more of these in the future"
"I'll make sure of it" he smiled softly.
She giggled softly and leaning up to kiss his cheek, "good night Law" she said before entering her room
Law on the other hand, his brain was short circuiting at how he could still feel her lips pressed in his cheek, and how the warmth had stayed.
It slowly brought a small, shy smile unto his face with a slightly flustered blush
'shw... She kissed me...!' he repeated over and over and over again until he passed out on his bed, dreaming of more things like these...
Bonus:
"So, how was your date?" Shachi asked the next day
"Wait... It wasn't a dream?!" Law gasped in shock
"You thought it was...?" (Y/n) laughed behind him before walking up to his side, "I guess you need a wake up call"
"What wake up call-" Law cuts himself off when (y/n) leaned up and kissed his forehead
"There, all awake now?" She teased slightly
It made him flustered and embarrassed but he was happy it wasn't a dream.
Or else he would've cried in the corner of his office, sulking... Too...
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thelonelyarchon · 4 months
Text
📮RETURN TO SENDER ᯓᡣ𐭩
004 - rejected
Note: written text up ahead after divider
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ONCE you turned the knob of the door that leads you to the living room, you half-expected to deal with the questions your other friends had for you. Locking yourself in the bathroom for five hours is not normal per se, but it was much needed for your sanity.
You’re surprised by the lack of your other friends’ presence. To give you and Kaveh some space to reconcile, they’ve stealthily hidden themselves behind a large china cabinet. You noticed them either way. If Kaveh noticed their presence too, he didn’t make it obvious that he did.
Kaveh stood in the middle of the room with a tight-lipped expression and guilty eyes that one would think he did something more horrible than just sending out a letter that wasn’t supposed to be sent. You narrowed your eyes at him. He winces.
Proud as you were, you knew Kaveh didn’t do anything wrong. He had only followed the instruction you have given him in the first place. Maybe your stubbornness looked for excuses to rationalize your own fault so Kaveh who had done the unthinkable got your rage.
When you see his guilty state, you sighed and walked towards.
“Ten minutes. Let’s talk this out.” You said in a weak voice.
Kaveh looked like a wilted flower. At the sound of your voice, he perks up just fine. He had been blaming himself for being reckless. As anyone who knew him would comment on that particular trait. He didn’t want you to hate him for this.
“Hey, I’m sorry, [name.]” He starts. You shake your head.
“What do you mean? I should be the one saying sorry. Between the two of us, it was my fault.”
“I mailed the letter.”
“I told you to mail them, though. You didn’t know which one is which so it was my fault,” you walked closer to him. “For that… I’m sorry. Don’t work yourself up too much.”
In an attempt to console him of the guilt he has, you pat his shoulder and give him a smile. He hesitantly smiled back.
“Also, if you think I’m mad because you were the one who sent the letter, you’re wrong. I’m mad at myself.” You laugh.
“So, this is settled now? Are we friends again?” Kaveh asked.
“It depends on the contents of that letter.” You used your lips to point at the letter on his hand, hanging at his side. He looks at it and raises it.
“It’s from Alhaitham.”
“I know.”
“You may not like the contents.”
“I know.”
“You still want to read it?” He confirms for the third time. You grab it from his hand and nods. Kaveh sucks in a sharp breath and waits.
You opened the letter and scanned the contents of the letter. The more you read the letter, the more your vision began to blur and the whirlwind of emotions began to suffocate you. You feel your heart breaking with each line coming from Alhaitham. You already expected this kind of reply. But it still hurt deep inside. To stop you from reading it, Kaveh covers your vision of the letter with his hand.
“That’s enough,” he said softly.
“I guess we’re not friends anymore, Kaveh.” You laugh jokingly through streams of tears. “I need a moment.”
“S-sure.” He watches you as you walk towards the other end of your dorm. You weakly throw Alhaitham’s letter away before sitting out on the small hanging balcony. Out of curiosity, Kaveh walked towards the bin and reads your letter. He notices the original letter he sent to Alhaitham.
Dear [Name],
I hope this letter finds you in good health. To begin with, I did not expect to receive such a letter on such short notice. I have read the contents of your letter thoroughly, and I have contemplated what to write back to you in correspondence.
I must admit I am flustered by your words of praises, Ms. [Name]. However, I would like to apologize for being a bearer of bad news.
Though I appreciate your enthusiasm and 'profound love for me,' I regret to inform you that I cannot return those feelings.
My feelings are reserved only for the one who makes my heart beat with fervor. I’m afraid someone already has the right to those feelings.
Enclosed with this reply is your letter. It may be best for me to return it to you. If we ever pass by each other or whether or not you approach me some other time, I shall treat you as though I know nothing so we may start anew.
I hope I didn’t ruin this day any further for you. For all that it’s worth, happy valentine’s day. Have a nice day.
Sincerely,
Alhaitham
Kaveh sighs and reaches the letter on the trash bin. He didn’t know what to do with it but something in him is saying that this will be needed someday. Maybe he’ll keep it safe until then. Maybe [Name] will need it someday.
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maireyart · 9 months
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Dude, I just had the best image: so it’s Obito-Lives AU, and part of his capture and house arrest and stipulation to his living is all his criminal assets are turned over and searched. That includes Kamui. So Kakashi goes to Kamui to search for the items Obito admitted are stored there, and he returns so appalled. Because, yes, Obito put bodies and important documents and items there, but he also just dumped a lot of junk. There are stacks of old magazines, dirty clothes piles, an assortment of bento box containers that were too nice to throw away, souvenirs from different places, crap Obito stole just for shits and giggles and Kakashi recognizes some of the stuff as things he “misplaced” over the years. “This was my favorite shirt.” “I knew that.”
Hi anon! And I'm sorry it took me so long to reply :3 The way it played out in my imagination was angsty and a little melodramatic, so no funny illustrations this time 😅 Ok, I admit Obito did call his dimension a "trash basket" (屑かご kuzukago) once in canon, and there must have been blood splashes, debris and not only from his battles, but something tells me he didn't use it as a literal trash dump xD (I guess he could just burn all that junk with a good katon jutsu). But I love the idea of him storing there something curious, something unexpected. I imagine he didn't want any reminders of his friendships, after everything... Even for shits and giggles. They could mess with his evil plan. Evoke the memories he didn't want. He was too vicious to be sentimental anymore, but he could take there something accidentally! Imagine the ANBU Kakashi period. Obito was often spying on his old teammate, and at one point he teleported into Kakashi's room to inspect it or look for specific papers and documents he could be interested in. Instead, he found something unrelated to his objective, something personal -- an old letter from Rin to Kakashi (that Kakashi seemed to have been in the mood to reread some time prior, wallowing in his sadness, so it was right on his table). Obito was standing there deep in thought, looking at the letter, absently analyzing the handwriting, but not really taking in the words yet, and then suddenly felt that Kakashi had shunshinned nearby ->
Obito had to return to Kamui immediately, but forgot to put the letter in place! It stayed in his hand, and then forever in Kamui; he never brought it back. Having read it for the first time, he felt anger and only anger and threw it away somewhere. The letter got lost among the gray blocks. He forgot about the thing altogether. But way later, when he was in his late 20's, or maybe even not long before the war, he found it again, and the words kept ringing in his head till the very end.
This old letter was… Rin's letter about Obito! The real Obito, the kid Obito, which the current Obito had killed in himself once.
It went something like this: "Dear Kakashi, I'm writing this letter to you because it's not easy to talk about these things in real life, but let me try to express my thoughts here. I know you can't stand Obito, but please, please, for the sake of our team, try to understand him, because he's… that and that… (describes his loneliness, and kindness, and potential, and aspirations, and dreams). Maybe if you just show him a flicker of warmth, he will open up, and you'll see for yourself how much it will benefit us as a team and in all other possible ways. I'm his friend and I know him well, and it's so worth it! Just please believe in Obito, just please try, and you'll see how much it will change things."
Obito was so irritated when he read it for the first time. He couldn't feel the message at all, they were just words of a ghost, of an unreal Rin, and that unreal Rin was babbling something about that miserable unreal Obito, the helpless one. Trying to reach Kakashi's heart. How futile.
Later, when he found the letter for the second time as an adult, he wasn't outraged anymore; he was too numb inside for that. But what he didn't like was that the words made him think. They were haunting him, and he hated that. And then, when the Juubi almost destroyed his consciousness, he made himself recall what had made him whole and hopeful once, and Rin's message sparked in his mind's eye again, more brightly, and it helped him take control of the Juubi. But only after the change of heart he finally started seeing the truth in those sentences and even hearing her voice saying them in his head; the words became alive and almost prophetic. And Kakashi's faith in Obito… It did finally touch his heart (as did Naruto's, of course), did finally reach him… and it DID change everything. * Now, Obito lives! And Kakashi somehow keeps the Sharingan eye or gets it back from him. He goes to Kamui after the war to "turn over his criminal assets" and finds that letter…
He brings it from Kamui and gives it back to Obito.
Obito, scratching the nape of his neck: "Ah… Sorry, I accidentally stole it from you ages ago." "I never noticed." "You didn't?" "I… memorized it so well that I never needed the original piece of paper anymore, the words were ingrained in my heart, is all…" "Why did you bring it back?" "I feel like you still need it. …Besides, thanks to it being in Kamui, it wasn't destroyed by Pein, unlike the contents of my whole apartment. When he attacked." "…Sorry." "Albeit losing things is nothing, in comparison with losing people." "Sorry." "I'm glad you're back..."
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