#and I think a lot of that is because m r james is so hard to translate to the screen

[idlesuperstar]

Freddie Fox as Edward Bellingham in Lot No. 249 [A Ghost Story for Christmas, d: Mark Gatiss, 2023]

[grandhotelabyss]

Advice/hard truths for writers?

The best piece of practical advice I know is a classic from Hemingway (qtd. here):

The most important thing I’ve learned about writing is never write too much at a time… Never pump yourself dry. Leave a little for the next day. The main thing is to know when to stop. Don’t wait till you’ve written yourself out. When you’re still going good and you come to an interesting place and you know what’s going to happen next, that’s the time to stop. Then leave it alone and don’t think about it; let your subconscious mind do the work.

Also, especially if you're young, you should read more than you write. If you're serious about writing, you'll want to write more than you read when you get old; you need, then, to lay the important books as your foundation early. I like this passage from Samuel R. Delany's "Some Advice for the Intermediate and Advanced Creative Writing Student" (collected in both Shorter Views and About Writing):

You need to read Balzac, Stendhal, Flaubert, and Zola; you need to read Austen, Thackeray, the Brontes, Dickens, George Eliot, and Hardy; you need to read Hawthorne, Melville, James, Woolf, Joyce, and Faulkner; you need to read Tolstoy, Dostoyevsky, Turgenev, Goncherov, Gogol, Bely, Khlebnikov, and Flaubert; you need to read Stephen Crane, Mark Twain, Edward Dahlberg, John Steinbeck, Jean Rhys, Glenway Wescott, John O'Hara, James Gould Cozzens, Angus Wilson, Patrick White, Alexander Trocchi, Iris Murdoch, Graham Greene, Evelyn Waugh, Anthony Powell, Vladimir Nabokov; you need to read Nella Larsen, Knut Hamsun, Edwin Demby, Saul Bellow, Lawrence Durrell, John Updike, John Barth, Philip Roth, Coleman Dowell, William Gaddis, William Gass, Marguerite Young, Thomas Pynchon, Paul West, Bertha Harris, Melvin Dixon, Daryll Pinckney, Darryl Ponicsan, and John Keene, Jr.; you need to read Thomas M. Disch, Joanna Russ, Richard Powers, Carroll Maso, Edmund White, Jayne Ann Phillips, Robert Gluck, and Julian Barnes—you need to read them and a whole lot more; you need to read them not so that you will know what they have written about, but so that you can begin to absorb some of the more ambitious models for what the novel can be.

Note: I haven't read every single writer on that list; there are even three I've literally never heard of; I can think of others I'd recommend in place of some he's cited; but still, his general point—that you need to read the major and minor classics—is correct.

The best piece of general advice I know, and not only about writing, comes from Dr. Johnson, The Rambler #63:

The traveller that resolutely follows a rough and winding path, will sooner reach the end of his journey, than he that is always changing his direction, and wastes the hours of day-light in looking for smoother ground and shorter passages.

I've known too many young writers over the years who sabotaged themselves by overthinking and therefore never finishing or sharing their projects; this stems, I assume, from a lack of self-trust or, more grandly, trust in the universe (the Muses, God, etc.). But what professors always tell Ph.D. students about dissertations is also true of novels, stories, poems, plays, comic books, screenplays, etc: There are only two kinds of dissertations—finished and unfinished. Relatedly, this is the age of online—an age when 20th-century institutions are collapsing, and 21st-century ones have not yet been invented. Unless you have serious connections in New York or Iowa, publish your work yourself and don't bother with the gatekeepers.

Other than the above, I find most writing advice useless because over-generalized or else stemming from arbitrary culture-specific or field-specific biases, e.g., Orwell's extremely English and extremely journalistic strictures, not necessarily germane to the non-English or non-journalistic writer. "Don't use adverbs," they always say. Why the hell shouldn't I? It's absurd. "Show, don't tell," they insist. Fine for the aforementioned Orwell and Hemingway, but irrelevant to Edith Wharton and Thomas Mann. Freytag's Pyramid? Spare me. Every new book is a leap in the dark. Your project may be singular; you may need to make your own map as your traverse the unexplored territory.

Hard truths? There's one. I know it's a hard truth because I hesitate even to type it. It will insult our faith in egalitarianism and the rewards of earnest labor. And yet, I suspect the hard truth is this: ineffables like inspiration and genius count for a lot. If they didn't, if application were all it took, then everybody would write works of genius all day long. But even the greatest geniuses usually only got the gift of one or two all-time great work. This doesn't have to be a counsel of despair, though: you can always try to place yourself wherever you think lightning is likeliest to strike. That's what I do, anyway. Good luck!

[strangestcase]

I’m trying to start reading gothic literature, but I don’t really know where to start. What books in the genre would you recommend?

Cracks knuckles.

Start off with a selection of Edgar Allan Poe short stories. There's a reason he's considered the best Gothic writer. Most if not all of his fiction falls squarely into the gothic genre, even his non-horror production. The more you read the better, but The Fall of the House of Usher is one of the best representatives of the Gothic you can find. Also check out his poetry and scientific essays, if you can, the guy was a real Renaissance man. He also wrote one novel, The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym, which, along with Lovecraft's In the Mountains of Madness and Cambell's Who goes there? aka The Thing From Another World constitutes some sort of "trilogy" (since each story was based on the one prior).

Then you can move on to other short story selections. Short stories are easier to read and digest, I think, and plenty of fun. I recommend the following authors:

J. Sheridan Le Fanu- Irish writer that took a page from Irish folklore and legends. Madam Crowl's Ghost is a favorite of mine.

R. Louis Stevenson- usually a children's author, Stevenson liked to merge genres and used pretty interesting concepts for his horror production.

Guy de Maupassant- he was commisioned to write, so he often recycled entire concepts and plots, leaving us with many different versions of the same story (and a lot of heavy-handed morals. god bless).

Charles Dickens- predictably enough, he specialized in ghost stories

M. R. James- James' short horror stories have some of the most interesting monster concepts I've ever read, from a haunted dollhouse that recreates the events of a real-life haunting, to a possessed pattern print.

Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer- little man puts the "Dark Romanticism" in, well, Dark Romanticism. If you know Spanish, do yourself a favor and read his short stories untranslated.

Elizabeth Gaskell- wrote plenty of good horror stories, and often from a female perspective, which is always a treat.

Bram Stoker- his stuff is very hit or miss, but when he hits, he hits hard. Read The Judge's House for a very nasty ghost story and then toss Stoker into the garbage because everything else he wrote is either comically racist or just dumb.

And now as for specific must-read short stories:

The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman- maybe the true monster was medical misogyny all along! (Obvious content warning for graphic medical abuse, misogyny, and domestic abuse.)

What was it? by Fritz O'Brien- short story in the vein of "hey wouldnt it be fucked up if this happened?" Don't read if you have sleep paralysis.

The Open Door by Margaret Oliphant- a missing child, a mysterious door, and forces beyond human comprehension.

The Empty House by Algernon Blackwood- would you spend a full night in a haunted house? (Very paranoia inducing, it's such a treat.)

The Ghostly Rental by Henry James- in which the "ghosts" aren't actually ghosts, but something far, far weirder and cooler.

The Monkey's Paw by W. W. Jacobs- this tear-wrenching and suspenseful little tale will forever remind you to be careful what you wish for...

The gothic literature "classics", as in, full lenght novels and short novellas, can be a bit difficult to read due to length. My personal recommendations are:

Frankenstein or the Modern Prometheus by Mary Shelley- a foundational text of science fiction with a nestled narrative frame and themes of personal and social responsability, bodily autonomy, and freedom. Young alchemist Victor Frankenstein attempts to blur the line between life and death, and unwittlingly sets off his downfall in the process by creating a humanoid creature he can't control and won't respond to. CW child death, death by axphysiation, incest, description of unsanitary environments.

Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by R. Louis Stevenson- it is considered the first modern psychological horror story, and, while it's a mere sixty pages long, each and every one of them is packed with a dark revelation about tight-laced Victorian society. When his lifelong friend writes up a suspicious will leaving everything to a stranger, a lawyer decides to look into it, leading him down a spiral of discoveries all related to a disturbing experiment. CW suicide, graphic descriptions of violence, drug abuse.

Carmilla by J. Sheridan le Fanu- very much a classic vampire tale, with an interesting sapphic spin, in which the predatory lesbian trope bleeds, pun intended, into a twisted love story. Laura is a young girl who considers herself prim and proper, until the day the charming Carmilla stops by the family manor claiming to be her soulmate, sparking off a romance marked by a series of strange events. CW implied sexual assault, gore.

The Portrait of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde- I consider it an early attempt at daylight horror, and while the plot is mostly romantic drama (canonically bisexual romantic drama!), the descriptions make everything else worthwhile. Beautiful model Dorian Gray's life is changed when he befriends a cunning aristocrat, which prompts him to wish to remain young forever while his portrait ages in his place... and his wish is granted. CW extreme antisemitism, suicide, graphic descriptions of gore and violence.

The Turn of the Screw by Henry James- a ghostly classic which is marked by its ambiguity and the opacity of its plot, all which make it all the more disturbing, if a little hard to follow at times. Bly Manor has appointed a new nanny to take care of a pair of twins, but soon enough, she finds out not all is well in the house, and a dark force might be preying on the children. CW implied incest, implied child abuse.

The Great God Pan by Arthur Machen- technically an example of very early cosmic horror, sitting at the intersection between Poe and Lovecraft, and clearly influenced by late Victorian scientific advancements. Some particularly gruesome deaths lead a group of men to slowly uncover the past of a one Helen Vaughan, and nature of a procedure performed on her mother before her conception. CW implied child abuse, suicide, sexual harrassment, human experimentation, extreme intersexism.

And those would be it!

[freetheshit-outofyou]

Let me put it in simple and hopefully you understand it skippy. This past election was fair. The ballot counting was part of a process that was legal in terms of how different States handle their elections. Democrats won and Republicans won. Same ballot for both. Same election. So are we all to believe that when Republicans win. It's a fair election. When Democrats win. It's rigged? You've been told this from a failed game show host in the last election. He's butt hurt because he lost. You're butt hurt because the "Big Red Wave" didn't happen. There's no 2000 mules. There's no fucking Santa Claus either.

It's like someone grabbed the stupid tree today and gave it a big hard shake and it's now raining political retards. I digress. (Oh, and yes I know I'm an ableist, it comes form being 100% disabled and being shit on but the very people who wait in the wings to call me an ableist. You can fuck right off.) This post is long, just warning you up front.

Ok Sport, let me try to break this down into little bitty words that you can digest and maybe learn something in the process. Ok, Little One? If you think any election in, say the last 20 years, was fair you are fooling yourself. I’m not talking about ballot box stuffing, I’m not talking about laws requiring I.D.’s or even voter intimidation at the polling locations, I’m talking about the long long game that is being played by both sides but most effectively by Democrats. Are you still following along there Bub? Because, I generally don’t pour my political leanings out here, I can see where lots of scary guns might lead you to believe I’m part of the Red Wave band wagon rather than someone who just wants the government to do what it was originally asked with and stop the ever expanding roll they want to play in EVERYONE day to day life. I’m going to give you that, Princess. I give credit where credit is due and Democrats have the best long game in the political arena, a big part of that is they keep people in power for decades and then get pissed when people are given seats to the bench for a life time because we all know they would love life time seats in Congress. Think I’m wrong there Squirt, follow me down the road of the longest serving member of congress. Of the top 25 longest serving members of congress 15 of them are Democrats.  1.           Robert C. Byrd (D-WV)    Jan 3, 1959-Jun 28, 2010               51 years, 5 months, 26 days

2.            Daniel K. Inouye (D-HI)   Jan 3, 1963-Dec 17, 2012              49 years, 11 months, 15 days

3.            Patrick J. Leahy (D-VT)   Jan 3, 1975-present                        47 years, 7 month, 22 days

4.            Edward M. Kennedy (Ted) (D-MA) Nov 7, 1962-Aug 25, 2009 46 years, 9 months, 19 days

5.            Carl T. Hayden (D-AZ)      Mar 4, 1927-Jan 3, 1969               41 years, 10 months

6.            John C. Stennis (D-MS)    Nov 5, 1947-Jan 3, 1989               41 years, 1 month, 29 days

7.            Fritz Hollings (D-SC)         Nov 9, 1966-Jan 3, 2005 38 years, 1 month, 25 days

8.            Richard B. Russell, Jr. (D-GA)        Jan 12, 1933-Jan 21, 1971            38 years, 10 days

9.            Russell B. Long (D-LA)     Dec 31, 1948-Jan 3, 1987              38 years, 3 days

10.         James O. Eastland (D-MS) Jun 30, 1941-Sep 28, 1941 and Jan 3, 1943-Dec 27, 1978 36 years, 2 months, 24 days

11.         Warren G. Magnuson (D-WA)      Dec 14, 1944-Jan 3,1981               36 years, 20 days

12.         Joe Biden (D-DE)              Jan 3, 1973-Jan 15, 2009               36 years, 13 days

13.         Carl Levin (D-MI)              Jan 3, 1979-Jan 3, 2015  36 years

14.         Claiborne Pell (D-RI)        Jan 3, 1961-Jan 3, 1997  36 years

15.         Kenneth D. McKellar (D-TN)         Mar 4, 1917-Jan 3, 1953 35 years, 10 months

The Republicans have 10 on that list they don’t even enter the list until number 6, there is one exception and I’ll loop back to that. 1.            Orrin G. Hatch (R-UT)      Jan 3, 1977-Jan 3, 2019          42 years 2.            Chuck Grassley (R-IA)    Jan 3, 1981-present                 41 years, 7 month, 22 days

3.            Ted Stevens (R-AK)          Dec 24, 1968-Jan 3, 2009              40 years, 10 days

4.            Thad Cochran (R-MS)      Dec 27, 1978-Apr 1, 2018             39 years, 3 months, 6 days

5.            Mitch McConnell (R-KY) Jan 3, 1985-present                   37 years, 7 month, 22 days

6.            Francis E. Warren (R-WY) Nov 18, 1890-Mar 3, 1893 and Mar 4, 1895-Nov 24, 1929 37 years, 4 days

7.            Pete V. Domenici (R-NM) Jan 3, 1973-Jan 3, 2009              36 years

8.            Richard G. Lugar (R-IN)   Jan 3, 1977-Jan 3, 2013                36 years 9.            Milton R. Young (R-ND)  Mar 12, 1945-Jan 3, 1981             35 years, 9 months, 22 days Then we have Strom Thurmond who played both sides at one point serving as first a Democrat who holds the filibuster record by a single senator speaking for 24 hours and 18 minuets in 1957 to block the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1957. He would change parties in 1964 to be a Republican. He is also the only senator to still be serving at 100 freaking years old. (Strom Thurmond (D, R-SC)    Dec 14, 1954-Apr 4, 1956 and Nov 7, 1956-Jan 3, 2003 47 years, 5 months, 8 days)

 I have always given credit to Democrats for their long game, When they are put in power regardless of level have a stack of plans ready to go. Those plans are almost always contrary to what the PEOPLE want but 110% what the Democrat power base and interests want. (See Mr. Biden, day one.) In contrast Republicans talk about plans and what they will do when given power and when they have it they stand there with shocked looks on their faces and their hand devoid of any plan, so they shoot from the hip and miss every mark. (See 2016’s repeal and replace of the ACA.)  But Democrats maneuvering start at street level, and they are effective at it. Where Republicans “Work” if you can call it that at the mid-level. (See redistricting that booted Rep. Sean Maloney (NY). They all do it, if you think they don’t you’re diluting yourself.

There is always talk of ballot box stuffing, ballot harvesting, gerrymandering and the like, more so since CoVID. If you think it’s not happening again see the line above this. It’s happening on both sides, I’m not saying that out of some conspiracy theory, Alex Jones thought process I’m saying it because it’s human nature. Humans cheat at things to win for the sake of the win, and they will cheat more often when they think their chances of being caught are lowest, our voting laws have made that evident. Case in point, I have opted out of every election cycles mail in ballot process since Nevada started doing it, Every cycle I get a mail in ballot, this year I got two? When you go to the poling location they ask you if you have your mail in ballot, I tell them no I burned them. If you do have it, it is dropped into a box and who knows what is done with it. I would prefer it was dropped into a shredder there in front of the voter to remove any doubt of what happed to it but that’s just me. I’d also prefer if mail in ballots were opt-in rather than opt-out. In the 20+ years I was in the Army I had to opt-in for an absentee ballot, I was not just sent one by default. So when I say I give Democrats credit for their ability to advance plan, have plans on hand when needed and their insane ability to keep old ass fuckers in elected seats I truly mean it.

Now, little buddy let’s talk about money and the media. Because none of this happens without the media and money. This is the root of how politicians get rich in office and how “interests” grease the wheels. It is not the mom and pop donor that is feeding the Democrats 1,222,701,185 in 2022 or the 1,010,083,760 to the Republicans it is big money donors that want hand have the ears of the very people they are pouring cash all over. Sure that bump that the individual donor add stacks up but there is a reason we get a text, a robocall, or an email and George Sporos and Richard Uihlein get a phone call they also get direct access to those in power (See the 2016 State Department emails to and from Chris Canavan of the Soros Fund Management and Assistant-Secretary of State Victoria Nuland Soros at that time was trying to used his direct access to the State Department to effect movement of his “vision of Ukrain” via our State Department. Soros would be part of a call with the State department 6 days after the emails were sent.) As if it wasn’t enough that massive donors have direct access to upper ends of the Government to ensure their political will the US Government itself actively worked to stop the flow of money to political opponents. (See the IRS admitting that it targeted Tea Party and Conservative 501(c)(3) and (c)(4)  organizations between 2009 and 2012. Now Sweet pants we get to the media. I’m not going to beat this dead horse very long because it kicks up the flies BUT, it is well documented that mainstream media, online networks and social media have made direct and intentional moves to suppress news that would shine as discouraging light on Democrats while highlighting stories that would show Republicans in an unflattering light. Do you remember the Trump Russian Collusion buttfuck? Of have you, like the media washed that from your mind Comrade? What about the Hunter Biden lap top that was such a work of fiction that Twitter ban people for sharing the story and the mainstream media refused to cover even the Idea of it, and yet here we are with state and federal official investigating it now years later because of it validity. I know you just want to counter with “But Fox news”, Christ Little Britches why in the hell would Fox not be a Right side propaganda outlet when CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, The Times, The Post , and hundred maybe thousands of subsidiary outlets of video and print are doing it for the Left? In conclusion Sport, your entire statement, your entire conclusion is wrong about me. I’m not sure where you dreamed it up from or how you put it together from my posts but than you for playing Bucky.

[worlds-largest-juice-container]

PRESIDENTS, BASED ON HOW PRESIDENTIAL THEIR NAMES SOUND

46. John Tyler. Literally just two first names, none of which have authority.

45. Franklin Pierce. Who the fuck is this guy lmao two first names again, slightly higher than tyler cause of what i call the two syllable rule, elaborated later

44. Donald Trump, donald is NOT a presidential sounding name, neither is trump, more of a business name. Two syllable rule strikes again

43. John Adams. Adams is a good last name, so slightly higher. Lots of johns on here.

42. James Madison. He had three terms and I think thats whack, name sounds like a kid.

41. James Monroe, similar to Madison but monroe is more presidential sounding, has more professionality.

40. Chester A Arthur, first middle initial, could be baller but chester is a really stupid name lmao ( no disrespect)

39. William McKinley, I think the Mc-names are copouts presidential sounding wise, ads an unneeded syllable.

38. Herbert Hoover, sir your name is a vacuum now also two syllable so higher

37. James K Polk (Napoleon of the stump) Cool tmbg song, two first names, higher cause polk is uncommon and middle initial.

36. Millard Filmore, honestly just alright. two syllable rule works in favor, but filmore is a NERD ASS name.

35. John Quincy Adams, a different adams. I like the name quincy

34. William Henry Harrison, Trying too hard to sound presidential, nice name but the three two three just doesnt flow.

33.Calvin Coolidge. Alright two syllable rule, this name has two or more syllables in BOTH names, adding much more authority. Calvin is the name of that tiger kid BUT coolidge is so goddamn swag.

32. Andrew Jackson, two syllable rule, two first names but first names that fit together well.

31. Benjamin Harrison. Solid name. Benjamin is not all that respectable but harrison is, solid last name.

30. William H. Taft. I like that Middle initial, but that last name? Get out of here, so cool. points off for william, unoriginal.

29. Franklin D. Roosevelt. copied the cooler roosevelt, still one of the best last names. Anyone I can call frank does not scream authority, but rather respectable low ranking construction worker who loves his wife and kids a lot and is a really great guy when you get down to it.

28. James A. Garfield. Thats a caaaat. Middle Initial and Garfield is inherently funny to me. would be higher without orange lasagna feline

27. James Buchanan. That last name though, First name boring, But Buchanan? Awesome. they all called him Mr Buchanan, nobody called this mf james

26. Zachary Taylor. Honestly despite being so high up, this one is not too presidential. I just really think this name fucks hard so honorary president points.

25. Grover Cleveland, I like this guy, two non consecutive terms? Swag name as well.

24. Thomas Jefferson, Classic name, good name, strong name. Though just cause you could call this man tommy its knocked down.

23. George Washington. I do not like the name george but come on. Washington is the most presidential word in the english language.

22. Grover Cleveland, Haha i did the joke where he is in here twice. because of his non consecutive terms

21. Harry S. Truman. Middle Initial, two syllable rule. Good president name. Harry though? could do better, how about Harrier? would be much higher if was that, more syllables= more president.

20. Joseph R. Biden. Name shortened to Joe, which is average, but that R initial and the fact that Biden is a very uncommon last name is pretty good in his favor.

19.George Bush, George is a bad first name for this list but i dont know the bush just screams president name.

18.George W. Bush, exact same as previous but middle initial.

17. Jimmy Carter. Carter is VERY professional last name, Jimmy not so much. Carter does lots of heavy lifting in this arrangement.

16. Ronald Reagan. Two syllables, Reagan is a nice name. would be higher but i dont like the guy.

15. Richard M. Nixon. Nixon, great last name. thats all

14. Gerald R. Ford. Dont like ford, but Gerald is a baller first name, very authoritative, and that R initial is pretty nice too.

13. Dwight D. Eisenhower. That last name is probably my third favorite overall last name, though dwight is bringing it down a bit.

12. Lyndon B. Johnson. Very nice name, rolls off the tongue well.

11. Bill Clinton. I like bill cause Bill is like the dollar bill and that last name works hard too.

10. John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Such a good name. we getting into the good ones one.

9. Barack Obama. Obama is just a fun word to say. Obama. Obama. read it out loud it flows very nice. Barack is cool too.

8. Woodrow Wilson. Fucking Woodrow. that name fucks hard. perfect early 20th name.

7. Andrew Johnson. Like jackson's name, but better.

6. Theodore Roosevelt. the better Roosevelt. Theodore is just a good name all around.

5. Martin Van Buren. Put van Buren on a nice first name like Gerald, and that would take the cake, but martin is just an average name, keeping him out of the big boys. the top 3.

4. Hard Decision but Rutherford B. Hayes is number 4. Incredibly hard name, so good, but the others just smack it out of the park with presidentiality

3. Warren G. Harding. Initially what i considered by top pick, usurped by the other two. This name is so good. Two syllable rule, uncommonness of first and last, as well as the G initial being very nice to look at. supreme pick.

2. Ulysses S. Grant. This fucking name hoo boy. Ulysses is possibly the hardest first name ever. So fucking good, Middle initial, but the last name grant is just ever so slightly holding it back. but the real winner was never a question

Abraham Motherfucking Lincoln. The best name anyone has ever had. I don't feel the need to elaborate. this man's name is the most fucking bad ass name, even his nickname, which as you saw knocked some people out, is so fucking good. toppest tier name. Goodnight now.

[mypoisonedvine]

𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮 𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙡 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 (𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐𝘐) || sub!bucky barnes x dominatrix!reader

(𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐)

𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 || your newest client asks you to give him a real challenge, and you’re happy to oblige.  

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 || 6.3k

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 || smut but no actual sex (lots of handjob stuff though and some brief oral m receiving), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, more cnc (because of the overstimulation), bondage, edging, impact play (riding crop), brief cock torture (she just hits him with the crop a couple times), implied “kink as trauma response” (this is gonna be a theme throughout the whole fic), forced to break a rule/doomed to fail/impossible challenge (idk how to warn for this but yeah), forced voyeurism?, thigh riding (reader rides bucky’s thigh), some degradation/dumbification, brief/implied dacryphilia, a bit of angst/feelings

new parts posted on thursdays!  join the taglist here

“Can’t,” he sighed, “can’t come again.”

He looked so painfully adorable when he begged like that, his brow glistening with sweat as he jerked under your touch.  “Aw, poor baby,” you pouted, twisting your hand when it stroked over the head of his cock, “yes you can.  I know you can.  Just gimme one more.”

“F-fuck,” he whimpered, “Mistress, please— just stop, please, I can’t… can’t take any more…”

“I know you can, sweetheart— I know you can be my good boy and keep coming for me.  Tell me your color.”

“Yellow,” he whispered.

“Think you’re almost done?” you pressed, smiling when he nodded breathlessly.  “Yeah, there’s my good boy— gonna come again for your Mistress?”

“Yes,” he breathed, baring his teeth as his hips bucked wildly to try to avoid further sensation, “y-yes, one more, just one more, I’m gonna— fuck, gonna come, just don’t stop… fuck, it hurts.”

“I know, but you’re being so good for me,” you purred.  “You like it when I milk your pretty cock, don’t you?  Even though it hurts?”

He winced but nodded.  “C-coming, Mistress, fuck, I’m coming…!”

Since it was his fifth of the evening, he could only give you one thick drop of come that gathered at his slit before running down over your hand which finally slowed to a stop.

You both sighed with relief as you pulled your hand away and leaned back, admiring how beautiful he looked as he caught his breath, covered in come and sweat.

"Good job," you praised with a chuckle, "I hope I didn't go too hard on you."

"N-no, that was… that was really good," he sighed, slumping back onto the bed.  "Can I use your shower before I go?"

"Yeah, totally," you nodded.

After a long pause, you gave him a confused look.  

"I thought you were gonna shower?" you reminded him.

"Oh… I guess I have to get up for that," he sighed, making you laugh.

"Rest a bit longer.  You've had a… challenging afternoon."

He nodded a little and you got up from the bed to go wash your hands and freshen up a little, smiling at your own appearance in the mirror— sometimes you forgot how you looked when you did this, but there was an undeniable aura of power around you… especially after a session like that.

This was only your third week with James, and already the dynamic felt so natural between you— and yet, so fresh compared to your other clients.  Normally it took longer for a newbie to get comfortable with you, yet most of them had had multiple doms before and here was James, totally inexperienced and taking it all like a champ.  There was an air of innocence about him, you figured, in contrast to this undeniable strength and intensity that you caught glimpses of from time to time.

Sometimes, it felt like he was chasing an innocence he lost a long time ago.  Whatever it was that drew him to this, you were happy to help him along the way.

It was probably a little dangerous to enjoy sessions with a client so much; even though you often pretended that everything was about your pleasure and not theirs, obviously since they were the paying customer it was the complete opposite in reality.  But there was an equity to the dynamic with you and Bucky, he served you with a real dedication rather than for his own gain.  And you, meanwhile, had rediscovered the fun in this career that had originally drawn you to it in the first place.  It was less like a science now, more like an art— you let yourself go with your instincts and do whatever felt right in the moment, and both of you benefitted for it.  

“Come on, get up and clean yourself off,” you encouraged— gently, of course— as you left the bathroom and returned to find James laying sprawled out on the bed.

“I know you said falling asleep here was a one-time courtesy,” he remembered with a smile, “but I could use it now a lot more than I needed it then.”

Honestly, you didn’t see him smile that often.  It was pleasant; you hoped to see it again.  He did get up, though, and take the washcloth you handed him to wipe off the come that had gotten all over him.  “What are you thinking for next week?” you asked as you leaned against the wall.  “Any special requests?”

“We can discuss all that over the phone,” he decided.  You still didn’t understand fully why he didn’t like to discuss future scenes in person; it was like he wanted the in-person interactions to be as ‘in character’ (if you will) as possible.

“Alright, just keep me updated,” you requested with a shrug.

You got changed while he took his shower, and when he emerged to the living room he seemed surprised to see you sitting on your own couch.  After a moment, you realized it was the fact that you were in normal clothes that threw him off.  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in jeans before… or pants of any kind.”

You looked down at your outfit with a smile, glad it was at least still professional and not sweats and a t-shirt or something.  “Yeah, I guess you haven’t.  First time for everything, right?”

“Yeah, had a lot of first times with you,” he chuckled.  “Most significantly less mundane than this.”

A brief silence filled the room but it wasn’t exactly awkward, at least not for you.

“Well, I’ll see you next week,” he decided as he grabbed his jacket from your chair and slipped it on.  You’d been spending most of this session trying to forget how good he looked in the leather motorcycle cut, so that was out the window now as you tried to keep from visibly biting your lip while he walked towards the door.

Damn, he was fine.  But there were more pressing matters at hand.  Like preparing yourself and your apartment for your next appointment.  This guy wanted to get slapped around until he cried… shouldn't be too difficult, but your arms would probably be sore tomorrow.

Opposite of last week, I really want you to edge me tonight, as long as possible.

Don't go easy on me, make me hold it in.  I need a challenge this week.

-J

It was odd how emails from James made your week.

He seemed to prefer to communicate his desire with you this way; maybe it was easier for him, and you couldn’t really blame him for that.  The nice part was that you didn’t have to temper your reactions, if you had any, since you were always alone when you got his messages.  You might be old hat at it now, but you could remember a time that you had to hide a grimace when a client told you to your face what he wanted.  Not that you would shame them for it or anything (unless, you know, they paid you to), but you didn’t enjoy everything you did with these men.

Did you enjoy everything you did with James?  Yes, but you were pretending not to— for your own sake.

You dressed a bit differently for today’s session, more conservatively… not that it was especially conservative by any other person’s standards.  But it left your legs and chest covered, somewhat in the spirit of ‘mean corporate businesswoman’ aesthetically.  For some reason you felt like using a riding crop required wearing pants.

James certainly didn’t seem to mind, with the way he nervously cleared his throat after you opened the door.

“Good to see you again,” you greeted formally, “please, come in.”

He stepped past you, still looking at you and not at what was in front of him, meaning he ended up slamming himself gut-first into your kitchen island.

“Oh!  Are you alright?” you smiled when you noticed. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” he nodded, rubbing his stomach for a second but recovering quickly.  “I told you I can take a lot of pain,” he joked.

“Well, we’re going to put that to the test today,” you promised cryptically.  “You must’ve seen the crop on the table.”

He nodded again.  “Yeah....”

“Are you looking forward to it?”

“Yes,” he answered, a bit too quickly.

“Then let’s get you tied up, James.”

Straddling his lap, you realized the rope was a bit too tight when you saw it digging into his skin; maybe he wouldn’t mind that, but you did, so you pushed the rope back through itself to loosen it slightly.

“How long did it take you to learn all these knots?” he asked casually, watching your fingers nimbly work the ropes around his wrists.

“Not too long,” you shrugged, “I’ve only been doing this a few years… but I knew them before that.”

“Boating school?  Boy Scouts?” he suggested jokingly.

“Just a hobby,” you decided, dodging the covert question about your past.  “Were you a Boy Scout?”

“Do I look like a Boy Scout?” he countered with a scoff.

“Not anymore,” you shrugged, “but I bet you did once.  You’re sorta innocent, you know.”

He swallowed dryly, and you raised an eyebrow as you glanced from the knot you were tightening to his face, which looked a bit flustered.  “R-really?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed, leaning back on your heels to look at him straight-on.  “Are you surprised to hear that?”

He nodded quickly, and you laughed.

“Aw, you thought you were so kinky, huh?  So dirty,” you purred, running your hand up his leg until he tugged slightly on the newly-tied ropes— a subtle way to get him to test them for you.  “But you’re really not.  You’re just my sweet, innocent boy.”

He whined— really, properly whined— and you dug your nails into his skin until he hissed instead.

“I don’t think you believe me,” you noticed, leaning back to reach for the crop behind you.  “You think you’re so filthy and perverted, right?  Are you a pervert, James?”

“Yes,” he breathed, shivering as you let the crop slide gently over his skin— his abs, his hips, his legs which were already quivering so adorably.  “Yes, Mistress.”

“And how’s that?”

“I think about… getting hurt,” he admitted weakly, “when I touch myself.  And I touch myself all the fucking time.”

“Yeah?  How many times a day do you stroke that pretty cock, James?”

“Twice every morning,” he blurted out, “after that it depends.”

You didn’t let yourself show your surprise at that number.  “Depends on what?”

When he hesitated, you hit him sharply on the thigh and he winced.  “Depends on what I… what I end up thinking about.  Sometimes… sometimes something reminds me, and I have to get off.”

Something told you not to press on what it was that he needed to be reminded of, and why it made him want to jerk off so bad.  Something told you he wasn’t ready to tell that story yet.  “Did you touch yourself today already?” you asked instead.

“No, no ma’am,” he shook his head, voice wavering as you brushed the crop over his chest, “it’s… it’s different with you.”

“Yeah, I bet it is,” you smirked, hitting him on the stomach quickly.  “I bet you’re finally satisfied, right?  Nothing’s ever worked for you before.”

“Yes,” he moaned, crying out slightly when you hit him on the arm (flesh— you were too afraid what sound the metal one would make) much harder than before.  “The nights I see you, I… I can sleep.”

“You sleep better?”

“No, I just… sleep.”

You tried not to react to that, moving to a new question instead.  “Do you want me to hit you again?  Or do you want me to stroke your cock for you?”

An obvious choice to some, surely, but he seemed to really struggle with it.

“Which one do you think you deserve?” you asked instead.

“Hit me more,” he decided.

Instantly, you struck him once on the face and again on the shoulder, then moved down to his legs for three in a row in spite of the way his body jerked away instinctively.  

“Fuck,” he sobbed, “don’t stop— I need more…”

You focused on his legs, on the inside of his thigh where he seemed the most sensitive.  His twisted joy turned to true fear, though, when you brushed the end of the crop over his balls.  “Do you want me to hit you here?” you challenged.

“I… I don’t know,” he stammered.

“Let’s make a deal, James,” you offered, “wherever I hit you, I’m gonna kiss it to make it better.”

“Then hit me wherever you want,” he nodded, almost smiling at you.  He cried through his teeth when you whipped his shaft with the crop— not especially hard, in fact quite delicately, though the second was harder.  And the third, though not much more aggressive, was right on the sensitive tip; his eyes shot open and his hips jerked away.

“So good, such a good boy,” you whispered proudly, putting the crop aside to lean in and kiss his cheek where you’d hit him before, his shoulder, his arm.

You worked your way down carefully as he breathed heavily beneath you, whimpering slightly when you kissed his thighs and notably ignored his flexing, leaking cock.  “Please,” he whimpered.

“Shh, be patient,” you soothed, “be my good boy.”

“Your good boy,” he repeated, trying to restrain himself but already bucking up into the air again, “fuck, wanna be your good boy, Mistress.”

“Are you already close, pet, just from getting hurt?” you asked in a faux pout.  “You’re not gonna come if I give your pretty cock some kisses, right?”

“I— I won’t come,” he promised.  “Not until I get permission.”

“Baby, it’s gonna be a long fuckin’ time before you get permission,” you promised with a toothy grin.  “Look down at me, honey, I want you to see this.”

He hesitated for a second but obeyed, looking down at you with an expression that was full of awe as you gripped his cock and gave gentle, teasing kisses up his shaft.  It bobbed in your hands with each one, and he let out the most beautiful sigh when you kissed the tip carefully.

A wide lick made him jerk beneath you.  “F-Fuck,” he stammered.

“You said you wouldn’t come,” you reminded him.  “Can I keep going?  Are you gonna be a good boy?”

“Don’t stop, please,” he breathed, “I’ll be good.”

Taking the head between your lips, you suckled gently as he shivered and moaned.  You weren’t sure you’d ever been with anybody— on or off the clock— who was so sensitive.  And you loved it, honestly; who could resist those precious noises he made?

As much as part of you wanted to go nuts and really push him to the edge, you tried to be gentle and careful so as not to make it impossible for him to hold back.  But even then, when you gently grasped his balls in one of your hands and squeezed them, he apparently couldn’t take anymore.

"S-stop," he hissed, and you pulled back, sitting up.

"You were close?" you asked, and he nodded a little.  "Oh, what a good boy."

He whimpered briefly.  "Yes, your good boy, Mistress…"

Your fingers trailed delicately up the underside of his cock, making him shiver violently.  "I know you want to come, but you want to be good even more.  You're such a sweet little pet."

It seemed like the praises did more to keep him on the edge than the touches, so you kept both going; wrapping your fingers around the ridge of his head, you gave the most gentle and subtle strokes, and leaned in to whisper against his ear.

“Is this why you wanted me to edge you today, James?  So you could show me how good you can be?” 

“I-I don’t know,” he blurted out, rocking his hips as best he could while restrained, “I just wanted to… I just wanted you to make me wait.”

“Well, you don’t need to worry about that,” you laughed slightly, “I can make you wait all day.  Is that what you want?”

“No, that’s— not that long, I can’t wait that long,” he shuddered.

“Mm, that sounds like your problem, not mine,” you smirked.  “Not sure why I asked what you want, honestly… cause I don’t fucking care.”

His choked-out whine was too perfect to ignore.

“Oh, what a pathetic little moan that was, poor baby,” you cooed mockingly, “are you regretting it now?  You’re probably wondering what you got yourself into, ‘cause you’re worried Mistress is never gonna let you come.”

“No, I don’t regret it,” he denied weakly, “whatever you want— do whatever you want to me, just… give me what I deserve, please.”

You stopped touching him completely and he straight-up sobbed.  “You don’t deserve anything from me, James.  You don’t deserve me at all.”

He told you before that he liked when you rapidly cycled between soft and mean.  Kept him on his toes, apparently.  Honestly, you felt a little guilty talking to him that way sometimes, but his cock leaking enough pre-cum to soak the bedsheets beneath him was a sign you were doing something right.  “I know!” he cried.  “I know, fuck, I’m sorry, but I need you.  I fucking need you, Mistress, please— you know I’ll do anything.”

“I’m feeling generous today,” you shrugged, “so I won’t ask you for much.  Just beg me a little more.”

“Please, pleasepleaseplease,” he rushed, “touch me.  Anywhere, whatever you want, I just need to feel you.  I know I… fuck, I know I don’t deserve it, but let me try to— to earn it.  Please.”

You knew if he had it his way, he wouldn’t do much talking at all.  But you couldn’t just let him have it his way, now could you?  It was better to make him just the right amount of nervous, just the slightest hair uncomfortable, by making him talk to you.  And, of course, you liked the way his deep and rough voice got all whiny and needy like this.

One finger under his chin guided him to look up at you, those pretty blue eyes watery and sparkling and wide with misplaced innocence.

“Tell me who you belong to, James,” you instructed darkly.

“You, Mistress,” he whispered, “I’m yours, I— oh fuck…”

Unshockingly, he was reduced to only moans again when you started stroking his cock, the slick precum making every movement smoother.  “All mine, huh?  My little toy?” you confirmed, but he could only nod and swallow thickly.

You sped up quickly, getting faster and faster until you were really, properly jerking him off and he was biting hard on his lip.  Just when he seemed to really fall into it, get almost comfortable, you had to stop.

"Oh, fuck—" he gasped, bucking his hips up to try to chase your hand when you pulled away, but it was no use with him tied up.  You watched his cock bob in the air and smiled.

“Did you think it was going to be that easy?” you smirked.

Shaking his head, you tilted yours to look at him, reaching up to trace your fingers over his chest.  

“Don’t lie, baby, you thought I was gonna let you come, didn’t you?  You’re so sweet, James, and so, so stupid.”

He gasped, and for a second you thought you might’ve gone too far, but it shifted to a moan quickly and you realized he was having the time of his life.

“Just my dumb, brainless little toy,” you continued with a snarl, watching him tug at the ropes as his eyes fluttered shut.  “It’s okay, James, it’s okay… you don’t need to think, I don’t want your mind.  It’s useless.  I want this pretty cock, that’s all I want from you.”

“It’s all yours, Mistress,” he promised, cheeks burning bright red and eyes forced shut.  “All of it, I swear.”

“I know,” you cooed, holding his face gently to soothe him a bit.  But then your other hand wrapped around his cock and he was anything but soothed.  “Shh, shh, don’t make any sounds, you’re just a toy and toys need to stay quiet.”

You missed his noises, actually, but he looked so cute biting his lip and struggling to suppress them.  His cock was so swollen in your hand that you honestly wondered if it was somehow getting bigger.  Was that even possible?  Your mouth was watering regardless.

“I’m gonna give you a little break,” you promised gently, “but I’ll be honest, pretty boy… I don’t think you’re gonna like it one bit.”

The look he gave you beautifully balanced fear with anticipation, and you stopped stroking him to reach over towards the bedside drawer and pull out a vibrator.

“Your Mistress is feeling a little.... self-indulgent today,” you winked.  “And since I, unlike you, don’t need to hold myself back from coming, I think I might as well get myself off if I want to.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed dryly, watching you closely as you stood up off the bed and started to carefully undress yourself.  It was a lot more fun to get naked when you were wearing something that didn’t actually show much skin— the button-up seemed to really get him going, his tongue mindlessly darting out to lick his lips as you opened one button at a time.

Once it was off your shoulders and on the floor, and he could see the almost-transparent bra you had on, you moved to opening your trousers as well.  Just to be mean, you faced the other way as you pushed them down over your ass; you heard his breath catch and you smirked to yourself, spinning to face him again in just the matching, dark red bra and panty set.

“What do you think, do you like this better than the black ones?” you asked coyly.

“I like you naked better than both,” he answered, and you grinned.

“I’m gonna let that backtalk slide just once because it’s not worth my time to go over there and slap you for it,” you decided.  “But don’t test me, James.”

“Yes, Mistress,” he answered dutifully, sounding a bit out of breath as he watched you climb back onto the bed, positioning yourself carefully.

You faced him straight-on and laid your legs over his, meaning your lace-covered pussy was in full view and only inches from his leaking cock— the damn thing looked sore by now, purple at the tip and just as desperate for attention as the rest of him.

When you pulled the fabric aside to show him your cunt, he hissed and looked away.

“Look at me, James, keep your eyes open,” you demanded, seeing how totally wrecked he looked when he turned his head back to you and stared down at your body with half-lidded eyes.  “Look at how fucking soaked my pussy is.  You remember how it feels to be inside it, don’t you?”

He swallowed, sighed, and finally (just barely) nodded.

“You remember how hot and wet and tight it is, don’t you?”

“Y-yes,” he choked.

“Well, that memory’s all you’ve got to work with, sweet boy, because I don’t think I’m ever gonna let you fuck this pussy again.”

He really, properly sobbed, tears streaming down his cheeks, and those arms flexed against the ropes defiantly.  “N-no, please—” 

“I’m gonna make myself come with this,” you promised, interrupting him as you grabbed the vibe, “and I want you to remember how it feels when I come around you, okay?  

Turning it on, you wasted no time pressing it to your clit, moving the end of the toy in slow circles and keeping a close eye on him as he watched you.  Your intention had always been to give him a show, but the embarrassing thing was how little of it was an act.  Ironically, even though you’d been edging him this whole time, having to touch him that way without any pleasure for yourself was almost as torturous.  You’d soaked through your panties by the time you had him tied up, to be totally honest.  So, giving into it and letting yourself feel good was a breeze.

“Think about when I was riding you, James,” you instructed, your own voice clearly affected by your pleasure now.  “Think about how good it would feel if I let you come inside me.”

“Oh, god,” he cried, leaning his head back.

“Think about my pussy milking every fucking drop of come out of you.  You know I wouldn’t let you stop until I was completely full of your come, I bet you’d like that.  I bet you’d like to eat your come out of me, you sick little pervert.”

“Fuck!” he yelped, tugging at the ropes harder now— for a second you thought he might really break them and jump you.  And for a second, you knew you’d let him.  It made your walls clench as you imagined facing the consequences of driving a man to the brink of insanity until he couldn’t help but fuck you like an animal.  It was a good thing he didn’t see you bite your lip as you imagined that.

“You know what I’m thinking about?” you taunted.  

“God, don’t tell me,” he sighed through his teeth, but obviously you ignored him.

“I’m thinking about what a good boy you are for me,” you cooed, your hips starting to rock up against where you held the end of the vibrator; you pressed it down harder onto your clit and moaned instantly.  “Yeah, I’m thinking about how pretty you look when you’re all desperate and needy and fucking pathetic—”

“Oh—” he choked.

“My dumb litlte whore, that’s all you are, James,” you groaned.  “I know you wish you could touch me, it’s all you can think about, right?  That pretty head of yours would be completely empty if it weren’t for thoughts of me and how badly you want me.  Right?”

“Yes,” he whispered huskily.

A shiver ran up your spine when the vibrator bumped into a more sensitive part of you, and you did it again and again until you thought you might lose it a bit faster than you meant to.  “This toy feels really good,” you informed him in a purr, gasping when you slipped the vibrating body of it into your pussy, “but it doesn’t feel as good inside me as you do.”

His eyes fell shut but he still winced a bit every time you made a sound; he couldn’t run from this, no matter how hard he tried.

“Oh James,” you moaned loudly, fucking yourself with the vibe for a moment before you pulled it back out to focus even harder on your clit, “I’m gonna come.  I’m so, so close… I can feel it getting stronger, I think I might make a mess on these sheets.  And the only way I’m ever gonna let you come is if you watch me do it.  So open your fucking eyes.”

He blinked quickly as he opened them, gaze scanning your whole body before settling on your cunt; you were sure he could see it pulsing as you got closer and closer, you knew he was imagining how it would feel.  You only spared a brief glimpse at his cock, bobbing between his legs, and wished you could just slip it in you now and come while it stretched you out. 

But that wasn’t what he was here for, sadly, and you were sure you were the only being truly denied of your desires, despite how it probably seemed from the outside.

“Oh my god,” you breathed, numbness starting to tingle in your legs as your orgasm built up quicker than even you expected.  “I’m coming— James, I’m coming, oh, fuck… right there— yes!”

A gush of heat warmed your cunt at the same time that shocks ran up your spine and down your limbs; you could feel your legs shaking, and you knew he could, too.  

It got so intense for a second that you had to pull the vibrator away, though you didn’t stop coming until a few moments later, eyes falling shut without you meaning for them to.

You actually laughed a bit, breathlessly, as you turned the vibe off and set it aside, although you weren’t sure exactly what was supposed to be funny about this per se.  When you opened your eyes, you saw James looking down and looking positively defeated.  But he looked tense, too, and you sat up on your wobbly legs to get closer to his face.  

“Relax, James,” you told him firmly as you examined him.

“I— I can’t,” he whispered. 

“Why not?”

“I’ll come.”

Nothing could fight your wide grin anymore, not when you heard that.  “Oh, baby… are you about to come without even being touched?  Is that how much you liked watching Mistress come?”

He nodded, ever so slightly, and you laughed.  Not quite a mocking laugh, moreso impressed.  Prideful, even.  You leaned in to give a wet kiss to his neck, licking over his pulse as he shivered violently.

“That’s my good boy,” you whispered against his skin.  He whined and you cooed soothingly right away, “oh I know, I know.  It’s so unfair, isn’t it?  Mistress gets to come and you don’t…”

“Please,” he stammered, “I’m so close, let me come, please.”

“But I don’t wanna see you come, baby— I wanna see you cry.”

You started to slide your hand down his chest and he jumped up to attention as he tried to squirm away.  “No, please, don’t— don’t touch my cock, not if I can’t come.”

“You can hold it in, can’t you?” you pouted.

“No, I can’t, I can’t,” he sobbed, watching fearfully as your hand moved down to his stomach and over his hips.  

“But I thought you were my good boy,” you frowned, suddenly wrapping your hand tight around his cock as he choked on a gasp.

“Mistress!” he sobbed.  “Please, don’t—  don’t move your hand, I’ll come.”

"Never fucking tell me what to do," you instructed firmly, just barely stroking as he cried weakly.  "I'm gonna touch you however I want and you're not gonna come because you're my good boy, right?"

"No, Mistress, I can't stop it, I'm gonna come— stop, please…"

"You'd better not fucking come," you hissed through your teeth, speeding up your movements and watching his eyes shoot wide open, "you'd better hold it in until I'm done with you."

"I'm trying— please slow down, can't take it—"

You shook your head, tutting disapprovingly.  "No, baby, I tell you what you can take."

"Oh— oh god, Mistress, please, please stop, please, I c-can't— fuck!"

You pulled your hand away the second his cock started to flex but it was too late: come was shooting from his swollen tip and painting his chest and stomach.  You didn't even wait until he was done to backhand him across the face.

"I'm sorry!" he yelled.  "I'm so sorry, I couldn't help it…"

You softened slightly when you heard his broken voice, saw the desperation and fear on his face— it was real, more real than the fake ‘no’s and the encouraging pleas for mercy.  "Baby, it's okay, you tried so hard," you soothed instantly.

Hope filled his eyes just as much as tears as he looked up at you.  "Am I still your good boy?"

"Always," you smiled, caressing his face where it was already turning red from your slap.  

You reached down and caressed his cock with the back of your fingers, watching it flex weakly.  

“Let’s get you cleaned up, alright?”

His lip twitched, almost like a wince.  “Do we… do we have to stop?”

You quickly glanced at the clock.  “Um, no,” you mumbled, “we still have time.  Just tell me what you want.”

“I wanna watch you come again…” he admitted softly.  “Is… is that okay?”

Although you weren’t sure what you’d been expecting, you were still surprised.  “Yeah, sure.”

“But… but closer this time,” he added, “not so far away.”

You were literally laying on top of him, how did that count as far away? 

“I wanna see your face,” he clarified.

“Okay,” you nodded, deciding to indulge him.  It was sort of like aftercare, except that this wasn’t exactly the ‘after’ part yet.

On your knees beside where he was leaning back against the headboard, you slipped your hand down into the lace panties again, finding your clit still swollen but not too sensitive.  A little gasp fell from your lips when you touched it, rubbing it carefully with two fingers while he looked up at your face.  

You felt slightly exposed when he watched you this close, and you didn’t know where to look to avoid direct eye contact.  Looking at his lips was just a little too tempting, so that wouldn’t work.

“My hands are a little tired,” you explained, “they might cramp up.  Maybe I could use your thigh…”

“O-okay,” he nodded, and you removed your fingers from your panties to sit down on the thick muscle of his leg.  You felt him tense up under you slightly, and you carefully began to rock your hips until your clit rubbed just right against the inside of your underwear.  Surely he could feel how wet you were— actually, you both could hear it, almost a wet clicking-like noise as the soaked lace slid against your skin.

The dynamic shifted slightly, not that you minded it, as he watched you ride him carefully.  Just as he couldn’t hide much from you when he was naked and tied up and baring his soul to you in the kinkiest way possible, you couldn’t hide your pleasure from him when he was looking at your face so up-close.  You let your hands carefully roam his body, narrowly avoiding the trails of cooling come he’d left on his stomach and chest, until you found his strong shoulders and held onto them for balance.

“Fuck,” you mumbled to yourself, biting your lip as your sore clit throbbed against his hard, muscular thigh.  

“Will you… could you kiss me?” he requested quietly, and your heart broke a little bit.  You shook your head, and he nodded in understanding.

“I’ll kiss you here,” you offered instead, whispering against his skin before you pressed your lips to his forehead, then his cheek, then his jaw.  “Is that better, James?”

“It helps,” he agreed in a sigh.  

“I’m close,” you warned quietly, pressing your cheek to his and weaving one hand into his hair.  “I’m gonna come again, on your thigh.”

“Let me touch you,” he begged, “just a little, please…”

You nodded, about to reach forward to untie one of his hands, but he snapped the ropes and you had totally forgotten he could do that.  He quickly ran his touch all over your body, calloused hands and bound wrists in stark contrast to your soft skin.  The metal one was a little cold but it didn’t bother you; the other was almost too hot, and it was like being warmed and cooled all at once.

He ran his fingers down your spine, he gripped one of your shoulders, he rubbed your legs: he did everything he must have been wishing he could do this whole time, even gasping as he ran one hand up your chest and over a cup of your bra.  Just as you sensed that he was about to ask if he could touch you there, you nodded and felt his metal hand tug down the red lace and grab your breast— thankfully not very hard, though he did give your nipple a quick pinch which made you gasp.

Burying his face in the crook of your neck, he finally settled his hands on holding your hips, just tight enough to slightly guide your movements as you rocked faster and more desperately.  “Please come,” he begged weakly, “Mistress, please… use me.”

It sort of hit you all at once then, like a punch to the gut.  Except, you know, a lot more fun than getting punched in the gut.

“James,” you gasped, legs quivering where they straddled his as a new patch of slick soaked the lace (and presumably his thigh as well).  He held you tight, kept you moving through it while your fingers tangled in his hair and your mouth fell slack for another, louder moan.

The way his lips moved over your skin, laving your collarbones and pulse point and the innermost corner of your jaw, was positively worshipful; reverent.  “Mistress,” he whispered, almost sounding like praise but tinted with awe.  Your movements slowed down to a stop and the two of you breathed a sigh together, unintentionally.  “Thank you,” he mumbled.

“What for?” you asked, blinking quickly and looking down at him, coming back to reality (though you weren’t quite sure where else it was that you had just been).

“I dunno, everything,” he decided.

“Don’t thank me,” you smiled.  “Keep paying me, though.”

He laughed a little, glancing away.  “Yeah, and I’ll pay you back for these ropes… sorry."

"No, hey, don't be sorry," you dismissed, getting up off of his leg and standing up to go grab a towel for him.  "I'm just sorry we still haven't found anything strong enough to hold you."

"It's fine, they're strong enough to make me stop myself when I want to do something I shouldn't, that's all that really matters."

You nodded to yourself as you dampened the towel and came back to wipe him off.

"I can do that for myself," he reminded you, sounding a bit embarrassed, but you thought it was sweet. 

“You just focus on getting those ropes off of yourself,” you decided with a little smile.

[m4tthewmurd0ck]

𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐈𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒 ~ 𝐁𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐁𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐱 (𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞) 𝐀𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

PART 2 OF 3 for my entry in @cryonme​ writing event :)

word count: 7.4k

a/n: as you can tell ^, this is part 2 of a series so click [ HERE ] to read part 1 if you haven’t already! full piece below the cut. other than that, nothing else to add so…enjoy! also if you’re reading this:

I JUST HIT 200 FOLLOWERS WHAT THE FUCK?!?! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! LONGER MUSHY POST  AND CELEBRATORY EVENT COMING LATER.

O N E   M O N T H   L A T E R

You and James still hadn’t spoken a word to each other.

Now, you were in therapy. It took a lot of convincing, but Sam convinced you when you accidentally let it slip that you still had nightmares. Thankfully you found a nice therapist who was willing to do virtual sessions, and you really liked Stan.

You normally did your sessions from the comfort of your room, because you didn’t want to risk the chance of James hearing you. But you heard the elevator doors open and quickly shut again, and F.R.I.D.A.Y. confirmed that you were alone on the floor, letting you also know a minute later that James was in the gym.

He was usually there a couple of times a day, at least 2 hours each time. Glancing at your watch, you realized that there was only 10 minutes left until your session. And since they were only an hour long, you decided that therapy could be in the living room today. The beanbag chair in your room was comfortable, but you were beginning to associate it with therapy, and you weren’t sure if that was a good thing.

Before you could talk yourself out of it, you grabbed your laptop, changed out of your pajamas and into slightly nicer clothes, and made your way to the living room. You just finished brewing coffee in the kitchen when your laptop started to ring, signaling that your therapist was calling and your session was about to start.

Todays session seemed to go by slower than the other ones that you’d already had. Normally Stan let you lead the conversations, he let you talk and vent about whatever was on your mind. But today, he wanted to lead things. Specifically, he wanted to talk about your time with New Hydra. It was evident that you still blamed yourself during the brief time you spent as a Winter Soldier, you had told Stan as much on your first session. He wanted to try and walk you through it to help you understand that during the entire time you were there, you couldn’t help it. You were forced to do things.

“—but I still did them. Yeah they were controlling me but it was my body. My hands. I ended lives.” It was total deja vu, you said the same words to Steve what seemed like an entire lifetime ago.

“What would’ve happened to you if you hadn’t done what they ordered?”

You thought for a moment. “I… I don’t know. I never had the option to disobey. Once they said my trigger words, that was it.”

“But if you had somehow disobeyed?”

“They probably would’ve killed me. Maybe I should’ve let them.”

“You think it’s better if you’d died than to have been under their control?”

A small shrug, and you feel a tear slowly make its way down one side of your face. You wipe it away, upset at yourself for crying in front of your therapist. You did once, in the beginning, and he said that’s part of why he was there, to give you someone to talk to, who didn’t know you personally and wouldn’t judge you no matter what you said.

“Maybe,” you finally whispered after a minute of silence.

“Be honest with yourself right now. What would it take for you to forgive yourself for the things they made you do?”

As hard as you tried, you couldn’t think of anything. “I don’t know. Maybe I’ll never forgive myself. Maybe I just have to learn to live with the fact that I did those things and I’ll never be able to take them back.”

“I’m glad you’ve kept your word, not going back in time to try and erase anything.”

You gave another shrug, having nearly forgotten that you admitted you considered doing that when you were first rescued. “It wouldn’t have made a difference anyway. Bruce says that changing something in my past wouldn’t change my future, it would’ve just created a different timeline and has nothing to with me, this version of me anyway.”

Stan nodded, though he was still a bit confused on how all of that time traveling and different universes worked. But he knew that deep down you were a good person, and that was what mattered during these sessions.

“How are the nightmares?” He asked after giving you a few minutes to sit with your thoughts.

“Umm, better. Not every single night now.”

“That’s good. Still the same ones?”

You looked down, then off to the side, not wanting to look directly at Stan as you spoke about the things that haunted you when you closed your eyes. “Mostly. Sometimes I’m— I’m still a Winter Soldier, only this time I’m killing innocent civilians that haven’t done anything wrong. Or it’s back when Steve and Nat rescued me, but I listen to Mikael and I kill them.”

“Does anything help, when you wake up from a nightmare?”

“It might sound weird, but hot chocolate helps. It’s like one of the only good memories I have as a kid, drinking hot chocolate when it was cold out. It’s not cold now, but it still helps. Or seems to anyway.”

Stan’s heart broke for you. He knows he’s meant to keep it professional, that he isn’t supposed to get emotionally attached with the people that come to him. But hearing her talk twice a week for the past 4 weeks, hearing her admit that deep down she feels like she’s still a monster even though it’s been over half a decade since she was rescued, he wishes there was some magic phrase she could say to make it all better.

The timer that he has on the opposite corner of his desk goes off, and he mentally curses himself for not remembering to turn it off before. Looking at you as it rings for the few seconds it takes him to grab it and turn it off, it’s like a switch goes off. You quickly wipe your tears and try to shake off the feelings that you have right now. If you don’t, you’ll only mope around for the rest of the day.

“I don’t have another appointment, let’s stay and chat for a little while more?” Stan attempts to keep you talking, seeing the look on your face.

“I’m alright,” you try to reassure him. “Really. Talking about this does help, I’ve never spoken about what happened to me like I did today. It… it feels weird, but also kind of freeing, in a way? To say all these things out loud.”

“That’s good!” He smiles, “I’m very proud of the progress that you’ve made. Are you sure you don’t want to stay on a little longer?”

You shake your head, “I’ll be fine. I’m kind of tired so I think I’m gonna go take a nap, probably look through the cookbooks when I wake up to try and decide what to make for dinner,” you shrug. “Plus Peter asked if I could train with him in the gym in a few hours so I’ll have that later too.”

After a few more minutes, you finally end the call. You shut your laptop and stand up, heading back to your room.

Once you’ve been inside for a few minutes, James finally makes his way around the corner and heads straight for his room. After not even 25 minutes, he just wasn’t feeling it at the gym. So he ran a quick 2 miles on the treadmill and decided to call it a day. He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but you’d never spoken to your therapist outside of your room before. As much as he… wasn’t fond of you, he was speaking to a therapist too, and had a feeling that if he had walked into the room, you would’ve shut down. And it was a miracle you didn’t hear the sound of the elevator doors opening and shutting once he stepped out, so he also didn’t want to risk you thinking he’d been there the whole time if he got back in and left.

He heard everything after you said but I still did them. Yeah they were controlling me but it was my body. My hands. I ended lives. Now he knew why Steve and Nat were most protective of you out of everyone, because they were the ones that saved you. Now he felt like shit. All he knew was that he came back after being gone for 5 years, and things with him and Steve didn’t quite go back to how they were before. And also, you were there. Steve spent a lot of his free time chatting with you, and part of him hated that.

Now he knew, and he didn’t know how to make it right. He’d been a complete ass to you, basically ignoring you in the beginning, and his staring problem didn’t help whenever you 2 accidentally made eye contact. Why hadn’t he talked to you? Why didn’t he just give being friends with you a chance? Now there was no shot of that. It had been nearly 2 months of him doing nothing but glaring at, or ignoring you. Sure, part of the reason he glanced at you so often in the very beginning was because he thought you were beautiful. But then he came to feel like you stole his best friend, so he pushed those thoughts aside.

After a quick shower, before he could change his mind, he got in his car and got to Steve’s place in record time. Just one look at his face, and Steve could tell that he knew. At first, James was angry. How dare he keep something like this from him when Steve knew it would’ve changed the way that he saw you, that he interacted with you? Now he felt like shit. But Steve simply shrugged, saying he loved him, but that feeling was deserved. And he pointed out that he kept your secret just the same as he kept James’.

“Would you have wanted me to go announcing to the whole team everything that you told me about your time as a Winter Soldier? Would that have made it better, if I shoved all of that information in their faces? Or would you have been pissed at me same as you are right now, because it’s nobody’s business unless you choose to tell them?”

Damn it. How the fuck was he supposed to make this better with you?

You weren’t lying when you told Stan that the nightmares weren’t as frequent. During your time with New Hydra, every night they didn’t have you in cryo, was a night filled with nightmares. After you were rescued, you had them every night for 3 months in a row. And each time you woke, you were thankful that no one else was on the same floor as you. Then, they eased up. It went from every night, to maybe a few times. And when you moved to the cabin with Tony and Pepper, it slowly trickled down to once a week. There were even a few good weeks where you didn’t have any nightmares at all.

But then after Tony snapped his fingers, and you were all mourning him while also feeling like maybe the bad things were over, your nightmares began to come frequently again. For the first 2 weeks after everything, the nightmares were every night. Sometimes twice a night, with you falling right back into it when you finally managed to get back to sleep. Now it wasn’t every night, but it was still 4-5 times a week.

Tonight was a bad night. When you woke up, the clock on your dresser let you know that it was only 3am. Knowing it was too early to get up and start your day, you sighed, still forcing yourself out of bed. The coffee / hot chocolate maker was loud, and even though James hated you, you weren’t going to risk waking him up with that noise, so you decided to settle for a cup of milk instead. After sitting on the couch for a few minutes, gulping down the milk, you slowly started to feel better.

One of the things that kept you going was Stan’s reminder that it wouldn’t last forever. With time, and talking to people, the nightmares would ease up just like they did before.

After you quickly washed and dried the cup, putting it back in the cupboard, you nearly screamed when you turned and were greeted with the sight of James opening the fridge. Your hearing was weirdly good, and you didn’t even hear him enter the room. He looked like he was about to say something when he turned around, but you mumbled a soft excuse me before going out of your way to walk around the opposite side of the counter to get to your room.

He felt bad, seeing how determined you were to get away from him. But he couldn’t feel upset at you, because he knew exactly why. If you had treated him the same way, he probably wouldn’t want anything to do with you either.

As you got back into bed and tried to force yourself to fall back asleep, you couldn’t help but think of what just happened. In the entire time that you’d known James, that was the first time he looked at you and didn’t look like he absolutely hated you. Then again, it was 3am, and he was just tired. When you left the kitchen, he was probably ecstatic.

You managed another few hours of sleep, but when the clock read 6:30am and you were wide awake, you decided it was a decent enough time to start your day.

James usually didn’t leave for the gym until 9am, so if you wanted to work out at all, now was the time. You quickly got ready, brushing your teeth and throwing on workout clothes, and made your way to the gym. You got there at the same time as Pietro, who asked if you wanted to race on the treadmills and see who could run a mile faster. Rolling your eyes, you agreed, saying you would only do that if he ran at a normal speed.

After the race which you know he definitely let you win, you convinced him to let you practice some of the moves Nat taught you. He was hesitant at first, but after you said you’d owe him and do whatever he asked, he immediately accepted. Now you were suspicious. And regretting your decision, but he pulled you to the ring, saying it was too late to back out now.

When you managed to land him on his back and had your knee gently on his neck for the 3rd time, he put his hands up in surrender, saying you won.

“But, princess, that win comes with a price,” he grinned mischievously. “You know the September Foundation gala tomorrow, yes?”

“Oh no.”

“But yes! You promised whatever I ask. Pepper said that only a few of us had to make an appearance, and I drew the short straw this time. But now you go in my place,” he shrugged, walking out of the gym before you even had a chance to say a word.

You sat on the floor for a few minutes, trying to process what the hell just happened. The little shit tricked you. That’s why his eyes lit up and he agreed to train with you so quickly. But, a deal was a deal. And you hadn’t gone to a gala since Tony passed away, so maybe it was time.

The door swinging open caused you to jump, and a second later, James walked in. You quickly glanced at the clock, it wasn’t even 8:30 yet. Why was he here early the one morning you decided to do a morning session? Not wanting to wait around for an answer, you quickly grabbed your phone and the small towel you’d been using, and made your way out of the gym.

“Wait.”

You were so stunned that he spoke to you, that you actually listened and turned around.

“Y-you don’t have to leave, I mean.”

“It’s fine I’m finished anyway,” you mumbled, walking out and heading straight for the elevator without another word. What the fuck was happening? Yeah you could travel through time but had you suddenly developed the ability to travel to different universes? You were in one where James was… nice? To you? Surely this was some sort of trick.

Whatever the case, you didn’t want to find out, so you went directly to your room, and were grateful that one of the bathrooms on your floor connected directly to it. This meant that you could shower, go straight back to your room, and spend the rest of the day avoiding James, just as he’d been avoiding you these past months.

The next day, Pietro appeared in your kitchen bright and early, a big grin on his face. He was talking to himself (but really to you) about all the fun things he might get up to now that he didn’t have to attend the gala. Maybe build a pillow and blanket fort, or maybe he’d lounge on the couch and just watch movies. Whatever the case, it would now be Thor, Wanda, Bruce, and you attending.

“Alright!” You chucked a piece of bacon at him, which he happily caught in his mouth. “No need to rub it in. Shit that means I have to get a dress,” you quickly scrolled through the internet on your phone, finding a fancy boutique that was located less than 10 minutes from the compound. You really didn’t feel like going there and trying on clothes, so you called and asked if there was any way you could just give them your measurements and if they could deliver a dress for an extra fee.

When you called, as soon as you said your name, they were overjoyed that you wanted to wear one of their dresses. The owner immediately took your measurements, saying they’d bring over everything they had in your size so you could choose from the lot. They didn’t even want to charge you, saying it would be an honor to have an Avenger wear one of their dresses. You smiled, it was the first time someone referred to you as that. After a moment, you asked if they’d be able to dress Wanda as well, and you thought the owner might pass out from happiness.

After hanging up the phone, you sent her a quick text, telling her to be on your floor in a couple of hours because you had a surprise for tonight.

She ended up coming over early, spending the next hour with you and Pietro watching random YouTube compilations on the living room tv. James heard you all from his room, and he wanted to go out there. But he knew he needed to find a way to talk to you first before you’d even want to spend time with him.

Pietro left once the boutique owner and stylists arrived, being led through the compound and up to your floor by Happy. When Pietro offered to stay because he thought you guys might need his opinion, he was met with Wanda removing her shoe and throwing at his head.

“Alright, alright! I’m going. Unless… princess?”

You rolled your eyes, “goodbye Pietro.”

Nearly an hour later, you and Wanda both found the perfect dresses. The boutique owner was so happy that 2 Avengers were going to be seen and photographed in their dresses, that they went the extra mile and brought in hair and makeup artists to get you both dressed for the evening.

At 5pm on the dot, you were both ready.

(((aesthetics / looks I’m imagining for tonight, Wanda obviously being in the red dress hehe)))

You chatted about how you thought the evening would go as you waited for Bruce and Thor, the latter insisting that they pick you up from your floor like gentleman, before you all headed down and to the SUV that was going to be taking you all there.

At 5:30 sharp, the elevators opened and out stepped the 2 men, looking very handsome in their suits. Thor jokingly bowed and held his arm out to you, and Bruce did the same to Wanda. You all laughed, and made your way to the elevator again.

James chose that moment to exit his room, figuring you all were gone by then. When he saw you, for a few seconds he was speechless. You were beautiful. And this was yet another moment that he reminded himself that he fucked up. He couldn’t compliment you now, you’d probably think he was plotting something. He sighed as the doors closed and the sound of all of your laughter faded away. He had to find a way to make things right.

The gala ended up being a lot of fun. You were quite shy, and Thor knew this, so he made sure to stay with you the entire night, asking multiple times if you were alright. At one point you all separated to mingle as Pepper had asked, and you found yourself losing your nerves. By the time you all found your way back to your table, you’d genuinely say you were enjoying the night.

Loki had rubbed off on Thor, who was feeling a little mischievous that night. He pulled a small flask from the inside pocket of his suit jacket, and offered Bruce the first sip. He declined, saying it wouldn’t do good to get the big guy drunk. Wanda threw her head back, taking about a shots worth of whatever was inside. When he offered it to you, you figured what the hell. You were enhanced, and remembered Steve saying he was surprised you could hold alcohol as well as him.

But you should’ve known that Thor’s flask was filled with Asgardian liquor, that you’d never had before. And while Steve could hold his own when it came to drinking, even he wasn’t immune to the effects if Thor was the one providing.

Luckily, you’d had the sense of only drinking as much as Wanda, and you all left soon after when you noticed people slowly making their way towards the exits. When you got back to the compound, Bruce was the first to get off at his floor, looking like he was about to fall asleep standing up. Thor insisted on taking you and Wanda to your floors, wanting to ensure that you were both safe.

After he helped you into your floor and got you a glass of water from the kitchen, he bid you goodnight and headed off to his own floor. You chugged the glass, then looked around the kitchen, suddenly starving. You were still pretty drunk, but you really wanted a grilled cheese. You had the sense to kick off your heels, but were so starving that you decided you couldn’t be bothered to shower or change into regular clothes first. So at nearly midnight, you grabbed a pan, 4 slices of bread because you thought you might die of starvation if you didn’t have 2 grilled cheeses, and every kind of cheese you had in the fridge.

You didn’t realize you were being so loud until you heard footsteps approaching the kitchen. In your drunken state, you didn’t even care that James walked over and took a seat on the kitchen counter, in fact, you were happy to see him.

“James!” You whisper-shouted, though he wasn’t sure why. “Do you want one?” You waved the bread in his face.

He was confused. When he sat down, he’d half expected you to put everything away and go straight to your room. He didn’t want you to, and was relieved that you were actually talking to him. But he quickly realized you were intoxicated. But you were enhanced, so how…?

“Doll what did you have to drink tonight?”

Again, you were so drunk, you didn’t even mind the nickname. “Umm, mostly champagne. Then Thor pulled out a flask and… yeah…” You were staring at all the cheese in front of you, wondering how on earth you were supposed to choose.

“Ah,” he nodded, immediately understanding.

“So. Do you want one? I can make you one, or two. Even three if you want,” you leaned over the counter, giggling as you whispered “I won’t tell anyone!”

“I—” he hesitated. He knew damn well there was only one reason you were being so friendly to him. And it was probably wrong of him to take advantage of that to have this conversation with you. But he felt so guilty, and he really did want to talk to you. “Okay, yeah I’ll have two.”

“Yes!” You grabbed 4 more slices of bread, then grabbed the butter from the fridge. After putting some on the pan, then placing bread on it to soak up the butter, you flipped it over and repeated the process until all 8 pieces of bread were a little crispy. Then you put one back on the pan, placed 2 slices of cheese on top, then another slice of bread. You removed it from the pan, and did the same steps over again until you had 4 sandwiches in front of you.

James was fascinated watching you, finding it adorable at how concentrated you were. The slight crease in your forehead as you lifted the pan each time, saying it tasted better if you flipped it in the air, he couldn’t help but laugh.

And as it often did, guilt crept in. Him acting like a jerk caused him to miss out on so many moments like this with you. You’d been living on the same floor for a little while now, and this was the first conversation you ever had.

“Ta-da!” You placed the plate down in front of him, nearly jumping for joy when he took a bite and said it was the best grilled cheese he ever had.

The next few minutes were spent in silence as you both enjoyed the food, and each other’s company. Afterwards, he insisted on doing the dishes. You thanked him, and said you were feeling quite sleepy.

When he didn’t hear you talking anymore as he stood in front of the sink, he assumed you’d gone to bed. After drying and putting away all of the dishes, he was surprised to find you on the couch, fast asleep. He debated whether or not you’d want him to wake you so you could go to your room, but figured you wouldn’t appreciate waking up at who knows when, and being in the living room with a full face of makeup, still in your fancy dress.

He looked at you for a moment before he said anything. You really were the most beautiful woman that he’d ever seen. And he hoped that when you were sober, you might still want to talk to him.

He scooped you up in his arms, walking you to your room. “Hey, doll, you gotta wake up if you want to change out of this dress okay?”

You slowly opened your eyes, shaking your head. “M’too comfy,” you whispered.

“Don’t you want to save your pretty dress?”

“Oh yeah, it might be all wrinkly when I wake up,” you giggled at the thought. You stood up, then turned around and asked if he could undo the back of your dress, which had a short zipper and a bow.

James held his breath the entire time, stepping back and coughing so you’d know he was finished. He immediately looked the other way when you just casually slipped the dress off and revealed a strapless bra and lace underwear.

“I’ll just… I’ll see you in the morning, goodnight,” he nodded without looking up to see if you were finished changing, choosing instead to turn around and exit your room.

When he was passing the kitchen again, he heard what sounded like you quickly walking behind him. As he turned around, you stopped.

“Can I ask you something? I know I’m drunk right now but I won’t have the courage to ask you tomorrow.”

He nodded, motioning for you to sit next to him on the couch. Once you were both seated, you turned to face him. There was still a bit of distance between you, and you were clearly anxious for what you were about to ask.

“Why— why do you hate me?”

He was stunned into silence. That was the last thing he expected you to ask, at least in this moment. “I don’t—”

You shook your head, cutting him off. “James please don’t lie to me. I’ve seen the way you look at me ever since you came back. And I know that I should’ve gone to Vormir instead of Nat and it should’ve been me that died because I—”

“No, no no. I promise you, I swear on my life, I do not wish that you died. I’m so sorry you think that. I know I’ve been an asshole, and there’s no good explanation but I promise, I don’t hate you.”

“Then why do you always look at me like that?” It was clear that you were trying not to cry, and he felt even worse.

“I’m sorry, really I—”

Without warning, you stood up, and dried the few tears that managed to fall. “You know what, forget I asked. I’m drunk, and not thinking straight. Goodnight James,” you gave him a sad smile and retreated to your room, not even giving him a chance to respond.

The next morning, you were thankful for the serum that meant you woke up with no hangover. You did, however, have a slight gap in your memories when it came to last night. You remembered coming home, Thor dropping you off on the 4th floor, something about grilled cheese, and… James? You remembered talking to him, but oh God, what did you both say? You vaguely remembered something about offering to make him food since you were already making some for yourself, and cringed at how stupid you must have sounded. He probably only sat and ate with you so that after that you’d leave him alone.

Things seemed to be going differently one night though, when you were jolted awake. You didn’t know what woke you, so you stayed quiet as you crept towards your door. A few seconds later, you realized it was the sound of… yelling? You sprinted towards his room, not sure if there was an intruder in the building or what, but it became obvious that the noise was coming from that direction.

You opened your left hand, blue energy glowing around it as you used your right hand to slowly open the door. Nothing could’ve prepared you for what you saw. James was tossing and turning in bed, clearly angry at whoever was in his dream. You weren’t sure what to do. You knew how dangerous it was to wake someone when they were having a nightmare, especially someone who’d spent decades being tortured. But you couldn’t just exit the room and leave him like this when he was clearly suffering.

“James,” you whispered, reaching out to poke him with one hand. Nothing, he continued to toss in the bed. You bent down, aware this might come back to bite you in the ass, and gently shook his shoulder.

One second, you were trying to wake him up, the next second, he shot out of bed and had you pinned to the wall with his metal hand around your throat. You knew this wasn’t him. It was a nightmare, when he wouldn’t loosen his grip as you tried to shove him back, you quickly raised your left hand and sent a surge of energy directly at him. You weakened it, so all it did was send him flying back onto his bed.

“James!” You knelt down. When his eyes shot open again, he was panicked. You sat down next to him and put your hands on either side of his face, forcing him to look at you. “Hey. Look at me. You’re at the compound, everything’s okay. It was just a bad dream.”

He was breathing heavy, but it slowed as you started to talk to him.

“Do you know who I am?” You asked, relieved when he nodded. “Okay, that’s good. You’re on the fourth floor of the Avengers compound, and everything’s fine.” You repeated yourself, remembering that Stan suggested to you that if you were having a panic attack or just waking up from a nightmare, repeating things you knew, like where you were and the fact that you were safe, would be good for you.

After a minute, you removed your hands and slowly stood up. There was a little bit of blood on his sheets from where he scratched the part of his arm where flesh met metal, so you motioned for him to stand up. When you looked at him again, he was sweating.

“You go take a shower, I’ll do this,” you motioned to his bed.

He had pretty much calmed down now, the full weight of what you just witnessed starting to hit him. He was so rude to you when he came back, yet here you were taking care of him.

“I’m sorry. I swear I—”

You smiled, gently pushing him towards the bathroom that connected to his room. “I get them too. And it sucks, and sometimes it’s nice to talk about it, but sometimes I don’t even want to acknowledge what happened. And I know we’re not friends, I don’t know why you decided to hate me, so we don’t have to acknowledge this when you get up in the morning. It’s okay.” You gave him a sad smile, meaning every word you said.”

He knew he didn’t deserve this, he didn’t deserve you. How could you be so kind to him after the way he treated you? But he was so mentally and physically exhausted, when you mentioned again that he could go shower, he nodded.

You quickly changed his sheets and pillowcases, and briefly wondered if you should wait around for him or not. After you had nightmares, the last thing you wanted to do (at least in the immediate aftermath) was sit and talk about your feelings. So you decided to just go back to your room. James still hated you anyway, and come morning he’d probably either regret that it was you that helped him, or he wouldn’t remember at all.

You were vulnerable after nightmares too, and you’d never hold this against James and expect him to welcome you with open arms now. Like you told Steve, you would never trauma dump on someone to get them to feel sorry for you and want to be your friend. You were still unaware that you sort of did that in a way, when he eavesdropped on your conversation with your therapist.

Him not saying anything after you said you both could forget / not acknowledge this conversation in the future, you took that as him taking you up on your offer. You helped him after a nightmare, but that didn’t change things. It sucked, but you’d learn to be okay with it. Of everyone in the tower, you understood what he’d been through more than anyone.

You and James would both be lying if you said you didn’t wish things were different. He kept telling himself he had to apologize for putting his hand on you like that, and knew he would’ve never forgiven himself if you got hurt and weren’t able to throw him off. You kept wanting to check up on him, and see if he was okay. But Steve was right when he told you a long time ago that you and James were 2 of the most stubborn people he knew.

While you were still sure that he hated you, you still tried to show him a little kindness. He was the only one who didn’t join the team for dinner, and after everyone was finished, the dishes were washed, and the leftovers were put away, you’d sneak back and put some food on a small bowl or plate and take it back to your floor, leaving it on the kitchen counter for him. The first time you did this you were nervous, but when you walked into the kitchen a few hours later and saw the food gone, you smiled. You didn’t say anything though, not wanting him to know that it was you who brought the food. Let him think it was Sam or Thor or anyone else, or he might not want to eat it.

After a couple of weeks, James spoke to Fury and let him know that he was ready to be sent on missions. The first time he joined you, everyone pretended not to notice the way he was constantly keeping an eye on you, especially when you were taking down bad guys. You didn’t have to pretend, because you genuinely didn’t notice. You made it a point to not look at him since you didn’t work together. You didn’t want to piss him off if he caught you looking, so you avoided him.

Another week went by, and Fury approached you all with the idea of solo missions. Initially, everyone protested. You were a team, and at the very least needed a partner to watch your back. He said he was overriding everyone’s disagreement. But he wasn’t an idiot, he’d never send you all on solo missions for anything other than a little intel or surveillance. When he kept glancing at you, you knew that you were the first one that would be testing this out.

It was simple. You’d be going back to the 1940’s to obtain extremely important information from Margaret Carter. When you heard Peggy’s name, you almost spit out your coffee that you’d just started drinking. But you realized that this would obviously be about 3 decades before you and Steve went back the first time, so she would have no memory of you.

“She’ll be expecting you,” Fury stood up and began to exit the room, as if he hadn’t just dropped that bomb of information.

“Excuse me, sir? How is she expecting me, I—”

“This isn’t our first time going back, just our first time sending an enhanced back without the use of other technology. You’ll be going to the same version of the past that we’ve already been to, and she’s expecting someone.”

“I… I don’t think I should just get whatever you need and then immediately return, sir. The further back I travel, the weaker I get. If I’m going back that far, which is forty years further than I’ve ever gone, I need to stay in the past for a while to recover or I might not make it when I come back.”

This caught his attention. He hadn’t fully looked over your file, and wasn’t aware of the extent of the damage that traveling did to your body. “How long do you think?”

“Well, going back a decade made me rest for an entire day. I can push it a little but I really think I’ll need to rest for a week. And the way Br— Dr. Banner, was explaining how it worked, a week in the past is only a day in the present. I still don’t know how that works, but it’ll probably be a little over a day for you guys.”

He considered it, but figured sending you back was still better than sending back normal civilian agents. “Alright. You’ll leave tonight.”

James no longer sent you death glares whenever you entered the room, so you thought maybe he was calming down or even warming up to you in his own way. And then you overheard his conversation with Sam. It was a few hours before you were due to leave, and you decided to head to the main living room / kitchen to make extra food since you would be gone for the next day. He and Sam were having a heated argument in the living room.

“— too risky!” James threw his arms up, unable to believe that Sam was defending Fury’s decision.

“What do you want me to do? She’s fully capable, she signed on to the mission and I’m not about to tell her she can’t go.”

“You’re the Captain aren’t you? So tell her that the mission is off!”

“I don’t know what’s in that file but you heard Fury. It’s important information that we, or at least S.H.I.E.L.D. needs. She even agreed that sending her back with her powers was better than sending back civilians with technology that’s not guaranteed to work every time.”

“Being enhanced doesn’t guarantee you’ll work every time either! If something happens…”

It dawned on you then that they were talking about you. Now you were pissed. James ignores you, makes maybe one half-assed attempt to talk to you but that’s it, and now he’s trying to sabotage you?

“What the hell is your problem James?” You finally make your presence known. Both men finally break from the staring contest they were having, surprised to see you in the room.

“Doll, I—”

You hold up a hand, silencing him. “Don’t call me that. You treat me like shit, barely say more than a few sentences to me, and now you’re trying to sabotage me with Director Fury. I don’t need permission from you to go on this mission. I’ll be back in a day, and that’s that. I’m going.”

“Wait, I—”

“When I come back I’m going to ask Wanda and Pietro if I can stay on their floor until the renovations are done and I can move to my own. I’ll sleep on the couch in their living room if I have to.”

Sam tries to apologize, saying he didn’t mean to upset you. You could tell he really did feel bad, and you knew that you couldn’t be mad at him. After all, the part of the conversation you walked in on was him defending you.

“You haven’t done anything wrong Sam,” you smile at him, deliberately avoiding looking at James. “Has Fury sent over the information yet?” You were waiting on a message that would let you know the exact date, time, and location that you’d be going back to.

“Yeah, s’actually why I came down to your floor. It’s January 10, 1945. You’ll meet Peggy in her tent, Fury said the time doesn’t matter, she’ll be expecting you at any point in the day.”

James froze, hearing the date. Something else happened in January of 1945. He glanced down at his metal arm, trying to brush away the bad thoughts.

(((side note; we all know what happens in january of 1945, bye bye bucky. but i couldn’t find an exact date, every blog and website just said that he fell off the train sometime in january. so… yeah let’s all pretend that my sped-up timeline is accurate)))

“Okay, I’m gonna go get changed and then I’ll probably just leave early. I don’t know if he told you yet but since I’m going back that far, I need to stay there for a while otherwise I’ll be too weak to come back. Time works different somehow when I travel so it’ll be a little over 24 hours for you guys, but over a week for me.”

Sam pulled you in for a hug, whispering “good luck, you got this”. He said he’d wait for you to change and then see you off before heading to the gym.

You went into your room, surprised to see that a black garment bag was placed on your bed. You knew you should probably dress for the decade, but didn’t think anything in your closet fit that time. But Fury thought ahead.

20 minutes later you exited your room, outfit changed and hair + makeup done. James felt like his breath was taken away.

(((sorry for the many interruptions, this is just a rough idea of what i pictured. the outfit actually is from the 1940’s and i thought it look professional-ish hsadfhasf. and obviously pretend the face is whatever you look like, but i just googled ‘1940s makeup’ and this was one of the first photos. i’m not white and this looks nothing like me so this was literally just an example of the style. classic curls, red lips, mascara on top lashes only, brows on the thinner side, etc.)

Sam whistled as you walked out, giving a slow clap as you entered the living room. He handed you the paper containing everything you needed to know about when you’d be going back.

You avoided looking at James, wondering why he was still there. That eager to get rid of you, he wanted to see you off?

“I might as well get this over with, I’ll see you in a day or so I guess,” you smiled before glancing at the map and piece of paper one more time. When you had everything memorized, you handed them back to Sam. You closed your eyes, concentrating, and then everything went black as you travelled back in time.

[proserpina-magnus]

☘️ - NSFW alphabet

James Potter if haven't done one

This is a little choppy but I hope you enjoy it! Mwah.

James Potter NSFW Alphabet

Reader: tried to keep it as nb as possible )

Warning: pure smut and no editing

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Super comforting and he’s really affectionate. He loves to massage your back (which will probably lead to another round). And he does that cute thing where he’d rub his nose against yours. He’d cover you in blankets and literally would hand feed you if he could. He basically forces you to drink water as well.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves your thighs, he likes placing his hands on them and laying in between them.

He likes his stomach since he’s worked really hard on it over the last couple of years with quidditch.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He will wear a condom only if you want, but he’d much prefer to go without. He’s pull out game is strong as fuck and he usually cums over your ass or thighs, sometimes even stomach.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

James wants to do collaring and he’s been fascinated and keeps daydreaming about being your good boy or having the opposite and getting you a collar that says “daddy’s _____” (preferred nicknames like girl or boy, etc).

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s pretty experienced without actually have experience, he wants first times to be important so he was actually waiting for the right one (which happened to be you). He can definitely find his way around your body with ease, who knows how he knows how to do it.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary, he likes have your knees over his shoulders and takes his sweet time making the moment last as long as possible.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s a sap so he try’s not to be humourus, he wants the sex to be romantic and he can’t risk turning you off with one of his lame dad jokes.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It’s a mess, he’s tried to shave it, comb it, trim it, it’ll just grow back. It definitely matches his head hair.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Like said before, James wants the sex to be romantic. He likes holding your hand and kissing your shoulder’s and lips until they're rosy. He just wants to take care of you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Pretty often, he gets stressed sometimes so he’ll just get out a quick wank before heading to class in the morning or late at night.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He has a ton, d/s is very present and the roles switch between you both often. Power play is a must and he has a big thing for bondage, he loves all the different knots and shapes, he thinks the ropes look pretty against your skin. There’s others like makeup, he weirdly finds it attractive when mascara runs down your cheeks.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Usually in his dorm, he prefers to have his time and spend every second admiring and taking care of you. He rarely would want to do something out of order and he needs a quick notice before trying a new location. He usually promises you he’ll satisfy you later if you become needy during class or at hogsmeade.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Everything, fuck me eyes go along way for him. Sometimes you don’t even mean to get him going and he’s rushing you up to his dorm. He likes the uniforms too, he’d purposely mix up your robes or house ties just so people would know you’d belong to a certain wizard.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He’d like spanking to a minimum, but the second he sees blood he freaks out. Even bruises make him worry and he’d begin to cry and kiss over it, promising you he’d never mean to hurt you and he’d be super careful next time.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He prefers receiving it, since he likes the stability of cumming down your throat. But if he’s subby he’s prefer to give you pleasure, he just wants to please you.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends, sometimes after a quidditch game (depending if he won or lost) he’d take it out on you, rough and fast sex was a must so he could released all of his pent up tension. But then he’d get really soft and gentle to soothe over the rough behaviour. If he’s subby, he’ll let you control everything.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Personally he doesn’t like it, a quick blow job in between classes is alright with him or even a quick fuck in the showers in the changing rooms, but he prefers his time and he’d rather have you all to himself for a few hours.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Not necessarily, he likes boundaries so you both talk over them often and he’d just do whatever was in the green zone. Sometimes if he’s being a hard dom he’ll try a risky move, wait for you reaction and depending on that he’ll keep it up or drop it immediately.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Oh boy… he’s not the Gryffindor quidditch caption for nothing. He’s athletic, charming, and a golden retriever boyfriend. He definitely can go for 4 or 5, depending on his mood and on time, since it doesn’t take much to make him cum.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t, he’s a bit embarrassed but he definitely isn’t opposed to watching you play with yourself. He actually loves mutual masterbation and he enjoys watching you show him all the things that make you feel good.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He hates teasing you but loves when you tease him, every little look or if you grab his arm for protection, he’s creaming in his pants. Whenever you whisper in his ear, even if it isn’t sexual, he’s gulping and fixing his trousers.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Subby James moans a lot, he whines and whispers and he likes to talk. But more dominant James groans and whispers cusses (which is the only time he rarely swears because he hates cuss words).

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He enjoys morning sex way to much, he likes the sunlight beaming in and the slow and groggy movements due to being sleepy, he loves the little whines and enjoys the cold air from the morning cooling off his hot skin.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

A solid nine inches, come on he’s James Potter. He’s quite proud of it too, smirking whenever he see’s a tummy bulge or even when you have trouble standing after sex.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It’s high to the extreme, he never knew how horny he truly was until he began to date you. Every day he wanted to take you to his dorm and try new things, he wanted to be cocooned in between your legs.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If he’s had a long day, it doesn’t take long. He’s a gentleman so he’ll kill you to sleep before he passes out, but sometimes you’d get back from the bathroom and see him sprawled out, a big grin on his face.

--

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[reallyneedsalife]

Headcanons Part 2

James Bond knows and has a fatherly relationship with Alex Rider. They met on a join mission between MI6's Double-Oh branch and the join MI6-MI5's Special Operations Branch that is the only branch capable of operating both inside and outside of the United Kingdom. James was assigned to play the role of Alex's father on an op and, well, he never really stopped playing the role. James and Q have plans to adopt the kid once they get enough time alone to sort out the paperwork and talk to Alex about it. Jack and Eve also get along in a way that none of them really understand.

I also like to think Ian Rider was OO2 and the go between for MI6 and Special Operations - hence why he was one of the few Double-Ohs cleared for operating legally on UK soil.

All the Double-Ohs see each other as more or less siblings - which when added with the idea that Silva was OO7 before James was all the more painful. The parallels work, their messed up childhoods because there is no way Silva didn't have childhood trauma, being Ms favourites and the personal meetings between the two - Silva meeting the his new 'baby brother' who took his place as 'Mummy's' favourite.

The Double-Ohs also play very competitive games whenever most of them are on shore leave. Things such as poker, manhunt and hide and seek. R has shot OO5 at least twice because she scared them and of course they carry?

Tanner could have been a Double-Oh. The only reason he didn't qualify is that sadly he suffers from asthma. Instead he took up the role of Chief of Staff, and Ms personal body guard. Most didn't know that about him, until that one time someone made a run past security and Bill took them out in less than 2 seconds. Even some of the official Double-Ohs are afraid of him - especially after he becomes Chief of Staff.

People seem to forget Q isn't just deadly with a laptop - as well being proficient in hand to hand combat, the Quartermaster is deadly with a sniper rifle and has startlingly good aim with a pistol. Good enough to rival James'. After all, MI6 wouldn't let him build the Agent's weapons if he didn't at least know how to use them.

James cannot watch spy flicks without tearing them to shreds - Eve and Tanner enjoy them because the pair love tearing them to shreds. Q enjoys the obviously impossible plots but by god will he point out the plot holes and rant about how things could have been done better. R loves them because they're easy to watch and so unrealistic they help to unwind.

MI6 as a collective will bet on literally anything. Will it rain tomorrow? £5 on at midday. Will OO7 bring his gear back? Is our darling Quartermaster related to the detective that faked his own death a few years back? Are Tanner and M dating? Does Eve know Dame Maggie Smith? (spoiler alter: yes she does.)

Eve and Tanner have very quietly-aggressive games of chess. The set lives in Ms office, he plays too sometimes but mostly its the Secretary and the Chief of Staff. Current score is 127:112

Expanding on my Q curses like a sailor headcanon - he frequently does do in other languages but never ever around kids. One time he swore in Spanish in front of Minion 27s kids and didn't forgive himself for 3 months.

Q rarely sleeps, but when he does it's usually on someone. He has a habit of sleeping on James' shoulder even before they were together - once they were that shoulder nap became a lap nap. James loves to play with Q's hair when that happens, Q can't really object. Even if it does make, as Eve put it once, him look like a "disgruntled kitten".

Everyone assumes Eve is the Gossip Machine of M-Branch and the higher ups and boy are they wrong. Sure, she'll share a lot of it, but most of her gossip isn't Moneypenny sourced. She gets most of it from Bill. As Chief of Staff with exceptional field and espionage training, its hard to find something that Bill doesn't know in the building. He has a list of questionable people who might maybe be up to something.

[littlx-songbxrd]

I have a lot of autistic tlh headcanons-

Alastair:

-stims by walking and playing piano. occasionally taps his fingers against any hard surface

-avoids velvet anything. he'd rather die than touch it

-gets sick from anything with the alcohol smell ie most hand sanitizers, perfume, certain cleaning products

-hyperfixates on poems, calligraphy, and his bf

-he doesn't know what his special interest actually is so he just says it's bantering with matthew and hating james

Thomas:

-stims by popping his knuckles, playing guitar, and swinging his legs in opposite circles while sitting on a tree branch or the edge of a roof

-will gag violently if he eats a mushy/soft carrot, squash, cucumber, or a soggy sandwich

-cant stand strawberries or lemons. both a texture and a smell problem

-special interests include alastair, anything to do with his latine heritage, and persian culture

Lucie:

-rarely stims

-she likes to swing her axe around when she's bored, anything that makes her arms move is fun and scratches brain

-is ok with velvet but much prefers it in cake form

-hates silk. h a t e s.

-hyperfixates on persian culture and the paranormal

-special interest is writing

Matthew:

-does not know he's autistic

-thinks he's severely broken inside

-stims by hitting his head and scratching his arms

-gets defensive easily because he's worried that if someone gets too close they'll discover how "broken" he is

-self medicates(canon)

-hyperfiates on fashion and romance

-special interest is oscar wilde

Grace:

-science autistic

-stims by throwing stuff, typically darts and hair pins but occasionally knives

-as much as she hates how many bad memories are tied to her hair, she'll never cut it because n o

-randomly taps her thigh with her palm in various speeds

-special interest is chemistry

Christopher:

-sciene AND math autistic

-plays with his fingers in different ways

-deals with really bad and negative thoughts

-nightmare disorder

-hyperfixates on psychology so he can help grace with her ptsd

-special interests are chemistry, physics, algebra, geometry, engineering

Kamala:

-also doesn't know she's autistic

-is incredibly emotional and sensitive

-she thinks it's because she's a woman

-needs constant touching

-stims by pacing and humming

-special interests are bees, butterflies, doves, and roses

-hyperfixates on how people perceive her and needing to be perfect

I am SO READY OK. Im not autistic so im mostly giving you reactions as i go but fbfjfjjfjfjfjfnf

----

Alastair supremacy pls bantering with mathew and hating james is always the goal here.

P o e m s c a l l i g r a p h y

Actually my friend really got into caligraphy and its so cool to watch them i can imagine alastair

I ALSO LOVE HIM WALKING AS A STIM

-----

Thomas hcs are all so true and so real and can we PLEASE TALK ABOUT HOW HORRIBLE STRAWBERRIES ARE THEY FUCKING SUCK GOD THOMAS IS SO CORRECT FOR THAT OPINION.

Also i know these are your hcs. But for latine heritage thing may i suggest magic realism? Its a latin american literary movement based around bringing fantasy elements to normal settings with little to no explanation that are usually a critic to society. It is one of the funnest most spectacular literary concepts in latin america.

----

ARMS MOVING SCRATCHES BRAIN

Justified hatred

Persian culture and the paranormal is so LUCIE GOD VDJDJD YEA

----

It all very much sounds like mathew. The part where he thinks they'll all just realize how broken he is hurts

----

THROWING STUFF >>

The hair thing damn.

CHEMESTRTYYY

---

Tbh id kill to see you write christopher centric stuff. I dont think ive seen that very much and im so intrigued by this interpretation

---

Kamala 🤝 Isabela Madrigal / lh

BUT ANYWAYS OMG YES I SPECIALLY LOVE THE HUMMING PART

[twillightteaparty]

Can I request headcanons for the Seduce Me boys falling for a chef who owns a popular soul food restaurant?

Seduce Me Boys Falling For a Chef Who Owns a Popular Restaurant!

James

I think he would be pleasantly surprised, like oh you run the popular restaurant everyone has been talking about? that's so cool! but also if you guys ever cook together I can only imagine how amazing the food is- to die for.

At Home dinner dates! candlelit dinner for two, would be the most romantic and enjoyable time ever. great food, great company, what more could you really ask for?

I honestly have to say energy of like the friend groups power couple but also no one really knows when you guys started dating because at some point just happened.

I don't know what else to say I can see it being a very slow burn, very loving, dynamic, and like once again when did you guys go from point a to point b nobody really knows but like it's nice.

Erik

I don't think he realizes he's falling in love, he thinks he just really loves the food. but he eventually realizes that he is absolutely smitten and oh god is he smitten. the charmer has become c h a r m e d.

Most certainly now understands the saying of the fastest way to someone's heart is through their stomach now. is also going to be spending way too much time trying to give them gifts that they'll love because he wants them to feel cherished

would become your house spouse for your food, please.

I also don't have a lot to say, honestly just wants to give you as much happiness as you bring him and will be more than happy to taste test your food.

Sam

would do anything to have some of your food. I mean, anything. the 'friend' that always askes you to make food no matter the situation just like. please <3

Will joke about you one day being a famous chef of like a 5-star restaurant. just wants you to succeed and doesn't realize this is all a very genuine want coming from a very soft spot in his heart.

give him 10-15 business days to figure out his feelings. after that he'll probably try to be as straightforward as possible about his feelings but like, we all know how terrible he is at expressing those feelings in words.

que meme / joke / whatever of 'finally some good fucking food'

Matthew

okay, all I can think of is the Coffeeshop AU vibes even though that's not remotely close to a restaurant but like Coffeeshop AU vibes.

I can imagine he doesn't even realize he caught feels for a little bit and then he's like thinking about it and he's like oh I caught feels and I caught them so dang hard.

will bring you flowers and suggests to go out and celebrate every time something cool happens at the restaurant like it won an award or something.

supportive friend? more like supportive boyfriend! hold his hand right now coward.

Damien

more coffee shop AU vibes, but like it's he's very supportive and like often offer really good advice and suggestions? I think this is a gradual very smooth fall into being completely and utterly s m i t t e n

probably waits a little bit to make sure he is sure of his feelings and that its a good idea and all that jazz. he then will probably very honest with his feelings. super sincere about it.

will help you make food whenever he's allowed or you want. he's just happy to find someone who is passionate about what they do and like is enjoying themselves.

s o f t , all of the soft moments and talks always happen over dinner with you two

---

not gonna lie, had to look up what soul food was. Due to my lack of familiarity with it, I hope that it's okay that I was rather general with it and was just like a popular restaurant instead. I don't want to offend anyone with my ignorance, so my apologies.

me taking forever to go through asks and respond, more likely than I would have thought. I've been a little bit busy recently so it may take a bit longer for me to finish answering things so my apologies Everyone

Signed, Admin Tea

[oingo233]

Rapture is a Boy

Summary: Remus and you have always had a playful, loving relationship but his behavior around the full moon leads you to assume the worst. A huge fight ends with the two of you heartbroken. Will Remus reveal the truth behind his behavior?  And will you still love him afterwards or has he truly lost you forever?

Young Remus Lupin x Reader

Warning: some angst sprinkled into this one, get ready for loads of it later, bitches like em’ sad, it’s me, I’m bitches.  Also, there are some cuss words, nothing too bad though. Self-doubt, cheating is mentioned.

 Authors note: I try to keep my writing(self inserts) gender, body type, ethnicity and house neutral/not specified.  If I ever slip up please let me know so that I can change it. Remus’s/3rd POV is italicized, it switches back and forth briefly to better show the relationship and luv. Ahhh to be in love with Remus fricken Lupin....

Word Count: 2.6

Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight

                                                       Part One

                                 **** Paper Skies and Butterflies **** 

It was so hard to focus with the most tantalizing pair of eyes burning into my back. I’ve felt them from the second my professor started to drawl on about the “rich history of muggles and witches” at the very beginning of class, it was now nearing the end  He was currently speaking passionately about the Witch Burnings. I can hear James, Sirius and Remus chatting quietly here and there but never once have those eyes of his left the back of my head. 

Remus, your boyfriend was admiring the piece of apparel you stole from him in a rush this morning, one of his favorite sweaters. He almost curses himself for not giving it to you sooner, he thought you looked beautiful.  

I try to focus on the lesson at hand “and as you all know, Wendelin the Weird was burned at the stake 47 times.  All in, of course, all in a different disguise.  No muggle will outsmart a witch everyone, especially not after my class...” He chuckles to himself smartly and this time I do turn back to Remus who rolls his eyes in response to the teacher, he breaks out into a huge grin as I try to hide my laughter.

I wish I could have heard the joke James just told because all 3 boys burst out laughing, only for the Professor to give them a mean look.  Remus apologies for the three and they all shrug ‘cooly’ to one another when the class won’t advert their eyes, and continue conversation.  I scoff to myself in a laugh of disbelief and wonder, how they’re able to stay so aloof and smart is beyond me.  But I’ve spent enough study nights with the whole gang in the library to know that they are more like hard workers than they let on.  They’re, in Sirius’s words exactly “...not daft pricks.  Just pricks here and there, ya know to spice up the ancient bore that is this school.”

The class is now more on-edge after the Professors mood was slightly damped, and it was for this same reason I decided to fully commit myself to paying attention.  But I was finished before I started, his eyes were back on me and now the smile Remus reserved just for me, as all lovers have one, is an image that won’t leave my trap of a mind.  I gave up trying to pay attention long before, but a tickle on my cheek brought me back to life with new curiosity.

There, fluttering in front of my face is a beautiful origami butterfly. It lands briefly on my nose and my friend beside me began to giggle, she watched as Remus had his wand out and was instructing the little thing on where to go. His tongue stuck out in concentration but there was a ghost of a smile as he watched me laugh softly. My friends constantly envied our relationship, because they admired moments like these.

The butterfly soars down to my desk and lands, showing off it’s snow white wings before dropping and unfolding itself before me. 

You look extra beautiful today.  Must be that dazzling sweater you’re wearing. Who would have thought you have such wonderful taste?

-R

I giggle and blush at every sweet word, and yes even the arrogant remark about himself, because it is both funny and rare when he subtly appreciates himself.  I just wish he could be as sincere in loving himself as he is to me.

Remus watches you as your blush and smile deepen in vibrancy each time you re-read his note.  He could not contain his adoration if he tried, and it was his bright smile in your direction that caught the Professors attention.  He watched with narrowed eyes, words still falling from his mouth about wizard and muggle interactions in History.  He watched as you smirked, licked your lips, and leaned forward over a piece of paper.  You flipped it and wrote a few words on the back before muttering a charm. He started to walk towards you, Remus watched with horror.  He tried to signal to you but it was too late.  You turned the paper into the shape of a star and it went darting into Remus’s direction.  A shooting star.

The class fell awfully quite as I spun around with a devilish smile to see Remus’s reaction, but instead I was met with my professor towering over Remus and prying the note from his hands.  

“No, sir-” The professor grunted and Remus spared you a quick look, you shook your head looking desperate.  He turned back to your teacher and yanked the note back with a charming smile.  “It’s just silly notes, Sir, really,”  The class waited, everyone held their breath.  When was the last time Remus denied so openly?  Pranks.  Yes, common business.  But this open act of defiance over something as trivial as a note is a rarity from the Remus Lupin.

“Just a silly note then, huh?  Wouldn’t mine me peaking at it then, huh, Mr.Lupin?”  The teacher stared him down with bitter eyes, I looked at the pair and shrunk down while I spoke.

“S’ alright.” I laugh nervously.  Remus hesitantly hands the note over and my face goes red.  There was no way I’d let Remus get detention for a silly note, but I might just with the contents inside.  I hoped on everything good and holy that he would read it quietly.  Not in his head.  And not out loud.  But luck was laughing and pointing fingers at me today.  

“You look extra beautiful today...” The Professor glanced at me from down his nose and under his glasses.  “...must be that dazzling sweater your wearing.  Who would have thought you have such wonderful taste.”  He cleared his throat and Remus smiled softly at me.

“She does,” Remus interjected, I hear some of my friends “awe” and Sirius made a gagging sound, James had half his hand in his mouth trying to stifle his laughter.  As if he hadn’t been caught saying more embarrassingly sweet things to Lily. I smile back to Remus, but he titled his head in confusion, his smile faltering slightly, my ‘grin’ came out as more of a grimace.  

Did he embarrass you?  He thought in horror.  But then the professor turned the note to your side and when he started to read Remus knew exactly why your face was flushed and your head hung like a beaten dogs.

“Very dazzling indeed, though I think you’d prefer it-” He once again cleared his throat and now he too, was blushing.  “Prefer it off of me.  I’ve been thinki-”

“Right Professor, I don’t think that was for you.  Quite pedophilic if ya ask me.”  Remus fights his own chuckle and mortification, and tries his best to protect you from the onslaught of laughter and embarrassment.  The loudest being the howling cackles of Sirius and James. The professor burned red, and grumbled under his breath, shoving the note into Remus’s chest.  He quickly pockets it.

I am half packed and ready to run seconds before the bell rang out.  I burst past the doors like a bat out of hell and only turn when I hear the joyous laughter of Remus.

“And I thought I ought to be embarrassed bout what I wrote,” He hugged me as I whined into his chest, inhaling his scent and reveling in the calmness it gave me after mortifying chaos.

“Bugger off...” I say, he hugs me closer and lets me bury my still very hot face into his neck, hiding from the whispers of others.  “awww.” He hid his chuckles with a kiss to my hairline, but I heard the bastard. I glare at his chest but soften as he squeezes me tight, when a particularly rude laugh echoes through the halls.  

He was greatly enjoying the comedy of it, though he wishes it was not at your expense. If it made you feel any better he’d later show you how much he enjoyed your full message to him.  “s’ alright love, they’ll have better, more nonsensical things to chat about by the end of lunch.” He says in an attempt to make you feel less anxiety about it all.

 I nod at his words, and emerge from his hug with a laugh of my own, hoping it’ll drown out my mortification.  But that did not last long.

“What ‘ave ya been thinking of again, (y/n)” James rushes out, as if he’s had it planned since the note was read aloud.  He burst into laughter again and Sirius was right beside him, hand clutching his shoulder for support as he just managed to get a remark of his own in.

“Yeah, m’ surprised to see ya still have that sweater of yours on.” Sirius barks out, James doubles over now and Remus pushes the two away. 

“You’re pricks, the both of ya.” You four walk down the corridors and though they’re taking the piss out of ya, the 3 boys glare at anyone else who dares to look down at you or call you names.  

Today was one for the burn book of course, but I couldn’t help but to enjoy Remus’s warm hand in mine, and the lightheartedness of the group today.  For the rest of the evening we met up with Peter and Lily and ‘studied’ which really just became an event of who could make the others laugh the hardest, and who can best re-tell the events of History class for Peter and Lily. It felt as if the sun had worked its way into the room, and shone brightly on the lot of us.  Filling us all with warmth and joy. I’ve enjoyed today so much because lately I’m beginning to notice quite an inconsistency in our happy times together.

Remus is very open with me, or at least I always chose to believe such nonsense.  I look at him now, illuminated by the common room fire, head thrown back in laughter, shoulders shaking up and down, the flames light dancing across his scars.  I’ve never seen something so beautiful.  And I’ve never felt something so beautiful, so all-consuming and passionate as our love.  I look at him now and want to believe that things are going well between us, but they simply aren’t.  

Tomorrow may be like this again, pure bliss infused with some normal teenage drama.  Maybe it will be this great even, for a full week.  But soon, he will begin to grow distant from me.  He will become quieter, and more aggravated towards Snape and others, he’ll pull away from all but James, Sirius, and Peter.  But then, those boys too will get distracted, acting weird. Leaving Lily and I to observe and ponder the behavior of the boys, and degrade ourselves quietly as to why they seem to isolate themselves from us.

Sometime soon... it will happen, it always happens.  But it never annoyed me to the extent that it has recently until Lucy Diamond, a Witch a grade below us, who started to walk occasionally with Remus in the halls, or to breakfast and flirting. Oh god, the constant flutter of giggles and laughter from the two made me sick. Half the time they’re interactions were brief, but sometimes I’d catch him share a smile with her and spark a long interesting debate about something or humor their conversations in other ways that made my head spin.   

Lily assures me that it is just basic human kindness, but she too will glance in confusion at the pair some nights at dinner.  Just the thought of Remus cheating on me, makes my throat dry up and my stomach shrivel up and drop with it. 

                                                     **** 

Remus was pulling away from me again.  We walked in silence with the others chatting around us, his eyes were on the moon’s powdered appearance in the still baby blue sky.  It was only mid-day.  I squeezed his hand and followed his gaze.

“S’ almost a full moon. Beautiful isn’t it?” I smile up at him, he smiles almost sadly down at me, nodding, god I didn’t think it was that bad of an attempt to converse. But then his smile grows and he looks straight into my eyes as he says...

“I’ve seen prettier things in my lifetime.” I laugh, and he can’t help his small chuckle at my blush.  He told be it looks beautiful but  personally I’ve never liked the whole tomato look. I lean into his side more and bump into him with my hip.  He bumps me back and we giggle like school girls through the hall.  

Then Snape walks by.  Oh Snape, must you be such a dick all the time.

He shoulders into me roughly, if it weren’t for the way Remus held onto me, I would have fallen over.

“Don’t you have eyes Snape, or is the view from so far up your arse blocking everything?”  Remus all but growls, we’ve all turned around to face Snape.  I tug on Remus’s hand to signal for us to go, I’ve never liked the way Snape and the boys are with one another.  But Remus lets go of my hand and steps forwards.  Snape sneers down at me.

“I thought whores enjoy being touched. Excuse me (y/n) if I wasn’t rough enough for your liking, I’ll do it much harder next time,” He drawls out smugly, his friends behind him laugh.  It was clear he was referencing my very inappropriate note to Remus last week. I burned hot from both anger and embarrassment, I went to defend myself but the voices of all our friends cut me off, beating me to it.  And then there was utter silence.

Remus was hunched over, his knuckles already turning red.  By his feet lays Snape, crouched on the floor, holding his nose, but not even the make-shift dam of his fingers could stop the flow of blood.  

“Bastard! You prick,” Snape hissed, already grabbing for his wand, Remus fisted his hands again and from the corner of my eye I see James whip out his own wand discreetly, Sirius already toe to toe with one of Snape’s goons. Lily ready to spar as well, her own wand gripped tightly in her hand. Peter stood behind us, his fingers twitching and he’s eager to pounce.

  But nothing happened. Because the bell rang and students filled the hall, hardly sparing any of us a glance despite the blood on the floor.  Snape points his wand at Remus

“You better hope you never see me again Lupin, next time I’m coming straight for you.” 

“It’s a small school, I’m looking forward to it.” Remus spits out through gritted teeth. Remus and Snape stare at one another for a long time, and with baited breath I think maybe not even the crowd around us will stop them.  Remus looks so angry.  I walk softly behind him and slide my hand over his shoulder, and take his hurt hand softly with my own.

“Lets go, my love,” I whisper into his ear.  He relaxes only slightly, tugging my hand he leads us out of the halls and rushes me to the entrance of my class before running off without a word.  His breathing was rough the whole time, and I watched as Lucy’s eyes follow his figure, and then she is off, racing after him. To calm him down no doubt. My heart turned into slabs of stone and fell down to my toes.   

Lily no doubt saw the expression on my face, she walks up to me slowly.

“You should talk to him. No use letting it build up, yeah?”  She urges me sweetly, squeezing my shoulder before walking into class. I stare down the hallway long after they are out of sight, I wonder where they have gone?  I wonder if they are alone?  I shake my head and decide to take Lily’s advice, I will talk to him about it all tomorrow. 

                                                         ****

 Now I love Lily dearly, and I’m not saying any of what happened next was her fault. In all and every sense, it was my own fault.  But the party we threw the night before all hell broke lose, was definitely her idea.  And it definitely heavily influenced what I did next....

[themculibrary]

Bio Dad!Bucky w/ Peter Masterlist

Links Last Checked: August 28th, 2024

Canyon Moon (ao3) - Astroash94 G, 1k

Summary: A field trip to Stark Industries turns into a hostage situation (because of course it does)

Ex-Assassin Dad and Super-Spy Mom work together (from opposite sides of the country) to get their only child out of the line of fire while also keeping the bad-guys from starting a nuclear war.

Family is a Work of Art (ao3) - Avengers_Whore M, 14k

Summary: “I’d avoid that one if I were you, Barnes. Not good for polite society,” a passing alpha murmured. James scowled and opened his mouth to argue, but Steve beat him to it. The omega had grabbed the alpha by the front of his jacket and got into his face.

“Say it to my face, you pompous, sack of-!”

“Okay! Let him go, Steve, I think you’ve defended your own honor,” James said, gently separating the alpha and omega. The blond huffed and let go of the rude alpha, watching him hurry off. “Well, no one has to worry about you, do they? You can take care of yourself.”

“I try. I get myself into trouble most times and it’s hard for my father to find an alpha willing to take me on,” Steve answered, face turning mutinous. “Most of them want a soft, docile, little thing to hang off their arm.”

Follow You Until The End (ao3) - mycatsaremyfriends M, 13k

Summary: Natalia Romanov has only ever wanted one thing, to protect her son, and she will do so at any and all costs.

Or, simply put:

Instead of the hysterectomy Natasha was promised, she was instead impregnated with an experimental child.

If I Could Do It All Over, I'd Find You Sooner (ao3) - snarkymuch E, 112k

Summary: He was pregnant.

Tony Stark, playboy extraordinaire and most desired omega, was going to have a pup, a pup that was put in him by the hottest piece of ass Tony had ever seen, and he hadn’t even caught a name. The only thing he knew about the man was that he’d smelled like safety; he’d smelled like home. He hadn’t even heard him speak.

or

Bucky escapes from Hydra briefly and meets Tony in a bar. Their one-night stand leaves Tony pregnant. Over a decade later, Steve enters the picture, still raw over the loss of his alpha Bucky. He and Tony fall for each other, but things get complicated when the Winter Soldier appears.

Standing Steady (ao3) - YouAreTheBrightest234 (TransLucas) N/R, 15k (WIP)

Summary: Peter just reminds Bucky so much of Steve and God knows how Steve turned out

Stark's First Two Love's (ao3) - RinGrayson M, 60k

Summary: A young (female) Toni Stark at MIT with her best friend Rhodey, steals the heart of a Hydra Assassin, only to end up prego.

Too bad it took so long for anyone to tell cap.

Bucky has a massive soft spot for tony and ends up not killing her parents but gifting her a child instead and even though their family is a bit fucked, over the years they always find each other.

The Backup (ao3) - ashdeanmanns N/R, 45k

Summary: (Alternate Spiderman backstory, in which Peter is the son of the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow. HYDRA makes him into Spiderman, into the Winter Soldier's backup plan.)

The home-trip. (ao3) - ShiningEve N/R, 4k

Summary: Fuck. Shit. Hell no. Damnit.

WHY

The singular piece of paper in his hand stated in bold print, "FIELD TRIP TO AVENGERS TOWER!" AKA, where peter lived, ate, slept, and trained. His own house. His dad would most likely laugh his head off at pyotr's situation.

The One Where Bucky is related to Peter (ao3) - marvel_cinematic_universe_fan G, 13k

Summary: When Bucky Barnes's memories return to him in Wakanda, he finds out he has a son. His journey to find his son leads him to an apartment in Queens. Meanwhile, Steve is trying to be supportive of his friend, Tony is trying to parent the spider kid, and Peter just wants his Aunt and Mr.Stark to stop smothering him. Too bad he's going to have a lot more people smothering him.

What a Coincidence (ao3) - notyoursherlock G, 4k

Summary: Peter was having a relatively good day when it was announced to his AcaDec team that they were going on a field trip.

To Romania, of all places.

He could only hope that nothing would happen.

(Spoiler alert: something happens)

[smilesthroughfandoms]

Every single episode of Ducktales (2017) Summarized in Roughly in One Sentence or Less!

Thank you Frank and team so much for introducing this family to a new generation of kids while remaining faithful to your source material. I hope you all enjoy my attempts at humor!

Woo-oo!: We don’t really know what’s going on yet but let’s do this!

Escape To/From Atlantis!: “Well I’m wearing a kilt McDuck! A kiiiilt!”

Daytrip of Doom!: They’re all siblings now and I love them all.

The Great Dime Chase!: “Shut up, everyone! I’ve done something brilliant!” (Also: Guess’s who my favorite character is?)

The Beagle Birthday Breakout!: Lena and Webby are best girls, fight me on this

Terror of the Terra-firmians!: This is the Spoopiest episode and also the most heartwarming.

The House of the Lucky Gander!: He’s an asshole but I love him.

The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks!: He’s an even bigger asshole but I love him.

The Living Mummies of Toth-Ra!: I too would do anything for a good burrito.

The Impossible Summit of Mt. Neverrest!: “If I had a nickel for every person who cursed me with their dying breath, I’d be twice as rich as I already am.”

The Spear of Selene!: Of course Scrooge showed up freaking Zeus.

Beware the B.U.D.D.Y System!: The fusion of Iron Man and Sailor Moon I never knew I always wanted.

The Missing Links of Moorshire!: I always knew My Little Pony had a deadly fandom but this is ridiculous…

Mystery at McDuck Manor!: Took you long enough, Duckworth, welcome back.

Jaw$!: In this house, we love and respect Tiffany. (Also: Whoever came up with this episode title is the coolest person ever)

The Golden Lagoon of White Agony Plains!: Scrooge and Glomgold are in love with Allison Janney, and honestly, same.

Day of the Only Child!: Doofus is even creepier than Lil’ Gideon, and that is saying something.

From the Confidential Casefiles of Agent 22!: *hums James Bond theme intensely to myself*

Who is Gizmoduck?!: He’s not throwing away his shot! (I’m sorry, I had to)

The Other Bin of Scrooge McDuck!: I love Louie in this episode, he’s such a mood.

Sky Pirates… in the Sky!: The Pirates of the Caribbean meets High School Music crossover starring evil Panchito I never knew I needed.

The Secret(s) of Castle McDuck!: We’re all Webby in this episode.

The Last Crash of the Sunchaser!: *ugly sobbing*

The Shadow War, Part 1: Night of De Spell!: Donald finally gets the love he deserves.

The Shadow War Part 2: Day of the Ducks!: *spoiler warning* How is she still alive?!?!?!

The Most Dangerous Game… Night!: David screaming “GAME NIGHT!” is the best damn thing I’ve ever seen.

The Depths of Cousin Fethry!: I love Cousin Spongebob!

The Ballad of Duke Baloney!: Dammit, Frank.

The Town Where Everyone Was Nice!: They’re boyfriends mates, sorry I don’t make the rules.

Storkules in Duckburg!: Storkules is the ultimate Donald Duck fan, we cannot comepete.

Last Christmas!: Somehow the Ghost of Christmas McBrayer is the least surprising thing I’ve ever seen in this show.

Whatever Happened to Della Duck?!: Oh, so that’s how she survived.

Treasure of the Found Lamp!: Dijin is the best character.

The Outlaw Scrooge McDuck!: Yee–and I cannot stress this enough–haw.

The 87 Cent Solution!: *wheezing* Dammit, Frank…

The Golden Spear!: Oh my god, they were roommates!

Nothing Can Stop Della Duck!: Dammit, Frank!

Raiders of the Doomsday Vault!: “So stand out, above the crowd! Even if I gotta shout it out loud!”

Friendship Hates Magic!: Webby gets two friends for the price of one seance!

The Dangerous Chemistry of Gandra Dee!: BEAKS SMASH… THAT LIKE BUTTON! (I’m so sorry)

The Duck Knight Returns!: *spoilers* The single best superhero, origin story-based episode ever! 

Whatever Happened To Donald Duck?!: *sobbing* He’s a good dad!

Happy Birthday, Doofus Drake!: This entire episode is creepier than most indie horror games.

A Nightmare on Killmotor Hill!: All the kids’ dreams are moods… except Huey’s, his dream can go jump off a microwave.

The Golden Army of Cornelius Coot!: Della is just pulling a Donald and adopting any and all kids within arms reach at this point.

Timephoon!: “I’m on it!” *gets struck by lightning* “I’ve immediately failed you!”

Glomtales!: I don’t know what’s more surprising, the fact that Louie won the bet or that they used Glomgold’s theme song takeover as the intro.

The Richest Duck in the World!: Drag them, Owlson. Drag them all…

Moonvasion! Part 1: *deep inhale* D A M M I T F R A N K!

Moonvasion! Part 2: Glomgold is my new favorite villain character.

Challenge of the Senior Junior Woodchuck!: Huey and Violet fight for the right to be crowned the squarest of squares.

Quack Pack!: Radical dude! *insert cheesy 90s riff here*

Double-O Duck in You Only Crash Twice!: We were all simping SO HARD this episode don’t think I forgot!!!

The Lost Harp of Mervana!: Scrooge fails a vibe check.

Louie’s Eleven!:  Is it really a heist movie if something doesn’t go completely wrong?

Astro B.O.Y.D.!: So much ANIME!!!!!!

The Rumble for Ragnarok!: Eh, the MCU did it better

The Phantom and the Sorceress!: Seeing Gladstone suffer brings me an odd amount of joy

They Put a Moonlander on Earth!: They’re lesbians, Harold!

The Trickening!: Did… did no one really tell Launchpad how Halloween works?

The Forbidden Fountain of the Foreverglades!: If I had a nickel for every time a cartoon version of Ponce de Leon died a gruesome death on screen, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice, right?

Let’s Get Dangerous!: *spoilers* THEY ARE A SUPERHERO FAMILY!!!!

Escape from the ImpossiBin!: Scrooge and Beakley are a little too excited to traumatize their family because of their trauma.

The Split Sword of Swanstantine!: Dewey and Webby literally walk in blind, Violet spices things up, and Huey unleashes the Rage™

New Gods on the Block!: The most accurate representation of Zeus ever.

The First Adventure!: Young Donald is one heck of a mood.

The Fight for Castle McDuck!: The sibling culture episode.

How Santa Stole Christmas!: Charles Dickens would approve, probably.

Beaks in the Shell!: Huey ships Fendra and Gyro needs to stop hiding in the closet.

The Lost Cargo of Kit Cloudkicker!: The Battle of Theatre Kids... in the Sky!

The Life and Crimes of Scrooge McDuck!: All the emotional weight was nearly overshadowed by One (1) attractive goth twink.

The Last Adventure Part 1; A Tale of Three Webbys!: They’re so cute! I love them!

The Last Adventure Part 2; The Lost Library of Isabella Finch!: Letting the kids on the plane is the single smartest decision Scrooge has ever made in his life.

The Last Adventure Part 3; Tale’s End!: *ugly, happy, heartbreaking sobbing* Woo-oo!

[imagineredwood]

I feel like after sons the writers were so happy they didn’t have to keep writing diversity in lmaoo, like sons covered bunch of different gangs so there was lots of racial diversity but Mayans is mostly brown people(which is how it should be if not all) and all the white people they could find. Like I’m sorry but the whole cast of side characters looks like a snow bank. Sons did a good job of showing you how diverse the people in proximity with them were. In Mayans the only people within reaching distance are white. Like there’s no one else around to interact with(other than that cop and Juan Denver I guess).

So, I have thoughts about this because I've seen it said a couple of times and I feel like people aren't really seeing the bigger picture, so buckle up because it's long.

The main one being that Elgin James had nothing to do with SOA. Mayans is in the same universe as SOA, but it's not the same story. It's a different culture telling a different story, with a different focus, due to different experiences in this country. A difference is also that Kurt was the one responsible for the creative process regarding SOA. So all of the racism, sexism, rape culture, transphobia, homophobia was from Sutter's vision, not Elgins.

Now. The 'diversity in SOA was never really there for diversity. It was there for plot. The Grim Bastards were there to make it seem like the club wasn't as racist as it actually was because "Hey look, we have black friends" talking about their long-established history while simultaneously talking down on them. The 9'ers, same shit. Prentinging to be cordial, only to try and pin them for something they didn't do because they played into the angry black man stereotype, Clay's exact words. Weston was a white supremacist. We know that. Anyone who watched for 10 minutes knew that. That was well established for his storyline. It really wasn't necessary for Sutter to make Weston's chest tattoo a part of the costume design, but he did.

Then they had "relationships" with the Mayans back and forth all the while calling them Spics. So is that added diversity, or is one more avenue for Sutter to include white men looking down on those around them who aren't white?

Then there was the Triad, same thing, Chibs' character references them by calling them "r*ce m*nkeys" so again, was it diversity because they wanted to show diversity and create that atmosphere? Or diversity because...you get the idea.

So that's one thing from a writing standpoint. Sutter was going for a shock value based show that was going to give white Americans a hard on and it did. What better way to bring shock value than to be racist at every turn presented and play on bigotry? Elgin is trying to tell the stories of what Latino MC culture is like along with what the Latino experience is like in this country period. He's not trying to shock the viewers or be named the most controversial show; he's storytelling.

Then there's the fact that communities usually tend to have people within them that look alike, and the smaller the town, the truer that is. People will naturally congregate together with those they have the most in common with. The bigger a city, the more diverse. The smaller a city, usually the more uniform their demographics are. So then speaking on demographics, let's get into demos for the areas that the shows are based around. For the record "Charming" doesn't exist, it's a fictitious place for SOA, however, its general real-life area where it was shot at is San Joaquin County, California. So let's look at the demographics for that location.

It's got a fair bit of diversity in the sense that it's spread out. Disproportionate sure, but the demos are relatively spread out. So the diversity that we see in SOA having been filmed in San Joa county is relatively accurate. The Mayans in that 42.0%, 9'ers and Grim Bastards in the 8.3%, The Triad in the 17.4%, etc.

Now let's look at Calexico, which is the bordering town between the Mexican and Californian wall where Mayans is based.

Not much diversity. Why? Many of the people who live in the Calexico area are Mexican and other Latinx people who have immigrated from Mexico and are just trying to get by and live better lives. Many stay in that area so that it's easy for them to go back and see their families, sometimes at the wall itself if either side is unable to cross. Calexico isn't really a place where people just...go. People that are there are usually there because again, either their family has been there and they never moved, or they're staying there to be closer to their loved ones across the border. There are always exceptions, but that's the basis. So you've got the Latinos that live there...and then you have border patrol and the police force that get their rocks off by going after Brown people for a living. Those are the main two groups present. So Mayans, like SOA, has stuck to being realistic in regards to showcasing the demographics and population in which their shows were filmed. Charming was realistic to San Joa Valley and Mayans to Calexico.

So all of that being said, I don't really understand why Mayans keeps being put under a microscope. I mean xenophobia is why, but I don't get why it can't just be enjoyed and had to be directed when SOA checked every morally void box there was and just got a pass. Mayans MC is scrutinized more than SOA ever was and it just gets a little frustrating after a while. I think it's amazing that Elgin and the cast were given the ability to tell these stories that so many of us in the Latinx community understand and resonate with, and they do it beautifully, but it always seems like there's a reason people want to drag it. I'm not saying that's what you're doing, but that's what keeps happening and it's bothersome. Mayans is supposed to be a spin-off of SOA showcasing life for a Mexican American MC and that's exactly what it's doing. It's doing what it set out to do, and some people are still tearing it apart for things that are realistic.

The diversity on SOA was performative so it could get people talking about it, just like Venus' inclusion was performative. Mayans isn't trying to do that. It's taking Latinx men and women and showing their lives within the Latinx community and the struggles that we face within that community. It's giving Latinx viewers something of our own, but it gets dragged like never before. We're just trying to enjoy this piece of representation that we were given and it's being clouded and tainted by the constant criticism that I never saw SOA get and frankly still doesn't get outside of this community it seems. I don't really know what else to say.

[proserpina-magnus]

☘️peter pettigrew

Hii! Like my other nsfw alphabets, this is a bit choppy and horribly edited. I hope you enjoy, mwah.

Peter Pettigrew Nsfw Alphabet

Reader: tried to make it nb as much as possible

Warning: pure smut and no editing.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Super sweet and gentle, definitely encourages you to take a nap and he'll bring you a snack or get you some water. He’ll rub your back and kiss your hot skin to cool you off. He definitely loves giving you praises and he’s spoil you rotten with his words.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves your hands, for some odd reason he just finds them so cute whenever you grip his hand for support as you climax or hold his cock.

His favourite body part on himself delphiers between days, but he’s usually very fond of his eyes. He’s very fortunate that he can look at you in such a lewd manner.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He usually always cums in a condom, but he loves cream pies. He, not so surprisingly, likes giving you oral for the exact reason he can taste you, he actually thinks he’s addicted to it.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He’s ashamed to admit, but once he was talking to James about a certain time when he fucked you in the library and James got a hard on. He swore he wouldn’t tell and it’ll be their secret, but he always felt guilty for sexualizing you like that.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s okay, he knew some of the terminology due to the other Marauders but with actual hands on experience; he had no idea. He felt a bit nervous during your first time but he didn’t need much help, he’d just pay attention to your reactions and get a clear view of what you’d like and focus on that.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He likes when you ride him, he likes to hold your hips and just let you use him for your heart's desire. If he had to choose another, doggy would be his favourite.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Peter doesn’t know he’s being funny until you have to stop and laugh, he’ll be confused on what he’d say and get a goofy smile on his lips while watching you laugh. Sometimes just the first awkward start of sex and the small giggles feel better than the serious times, but Peter can be really gentle and intimate if he wanted to be.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s somewhat groomed, he doesn’t necessarily care for your hair down there or his own. It’s a bit darker than his head hair, but he trims it sometimes just to keep it neat.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Lots of neck kisses, he needs to constant “I love you’s” during sex even if it’s rough. He’s actually pretty gentle during some moments and cares about your pleasure over his.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He actually never liked it, he likes your mouth a lot more even if it was just for cock warming. He’d enjoy your hands better than his, but he also has a somewhat size kink and seeing your much smaller hands take his cock please him a lot more.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

There isn’t necessarily a set number of kinks, he’d love to try anything that isn’t too “weird” as he would call it. He never really likes to stick to one kink, more like spreading them out depending on his mood. One day he’d want to tie you up and the other he’d let you do whatever you wanted. He adores pillow prince(ss) though.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere, he’d fuck you in honey dukes, the three break sticks, closets, near the black lake, behind trees and bushes, his bed, your bed, his friends bed, shower, desks, professors desks, anywhere anytime.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Feminine clothing, something about it makes his head spin and he just loves fucking you in dresses. He also has a clothes kink, he’d love to fuck you in his clothes. Don’t even get him started on if you ever decide to wear sexual clothing, it’ll drive him crazy.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Major dom and sub roles (like day to day life style) feels him out, he can’t distribute or give out rules, he doesn’t like that type of control over someone or giving someone that control of him. He likes some parts of d/s and he’d definitely be comfortable with some aspects, but not full on life changing.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He prefers receiving oral sometimes, but he doesn’t expect it everytime. He loves giving, since he feels like it’s the only thing he’s good at. He’ll run his tongue and suck your sensitive flesh until he’s satisfied, giving you oral is more of a pleasure for himself.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Peter’s sex is soft yet rough, sometimes he just takes his time with dragging his cock deep inside of you and pulling it out. Others he just likes to bend you over and fuck you till your dumb. Sometimes he lacks compassion for how you’d take his cock, yet after he’s careful to check you over and soothe out any aches.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Only thing he looks forward to on school days. He’s already emotionally tired but getting a good fuck in a empty classroom or a bathroom stall always helps him get through the day, especially if you tell him you’d wait for him in his dorm later that night.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

It depends what the risk is, Peter likes to fuck you all over the place if he can. He definitely been given warnings by prefects way to many times.James and Sirius always say his animagi should be a bunny with all the fucking they catch you guys doing. Greatest risk he ever took was fucking you during a quidditch game behind the bleachers.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can go for a couple of rounds, depending if it’s just oral or penetration. He can spend hours just focusing on you, exploring your body and roping out orgasm after orgasm.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He definitely likes using a vibrator, dildos aren’t really his thing. He does have a few anal plugs, but he doesn’t use them as much as he would like too. He usually uses them for your pleasure, but he wouldn’t be opposed to having a cock ring on.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s actually a huge tease, he likes to place his hand on your thigh during class and just mindlessly rub his thumb right near your goods. He gives a dumb look like he doesn’t know what he’s doing, but his smirk whenever he catches your heavy breaths are apparent he knows exactly what he’s doing.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

The whimpers are the best part, he rarely moans, just mumble’s of “oh fuck” and heavy breaths. Especially the early morning sex, because his sensitivity is heightened and he’s just making gurgled whined and deep groans.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Honestly, he’d probably want to fuck you infront of his friends. Especially the days when they flirt or tease you, he’d just get this immediate thought to show them that he isn’t sharing you.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I’d estimate a good 7-9 inches, the exact number isn’t known but all I can say is the girth is the best part.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It’s in and out, most months it’s normal for a teenage boy but other months he can go days without it, sometimes even weeks. But on the months he’s active, sex is a pretty regular thing everyday to day.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Peter is nocturnal, so it rarely depends on what time of day you guys had sex. If it’s on the weekends during midday, he probably will take a nap until dinner. If it’s in the morning… I don’t even think he could stay awake long enough to finish. But late at night it’s a whole new thing, he would probably cuddle you for a few moments until he knew you were asleep and work on his assignments and homework.

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