#and also if its a straight trans person obviously

[our-lesboy-experience]

in response to the previous anon, i personally identify as both a lesbian and an actual man as a binary trans man who is exclusively attracted to women! before transitioning i identified as a lesbian and was very active in a lot of lesbian communities, so its still an important part of my identity - ive been lesbian longer than ive been out as trans so a lot of my experiences have been shaped by being lesbian (i.e. ive been shamed for being attracted to girls, which is commonly seen as a lesbian exclusive experience and not one of a straight man, ive been called and identified as a dyke and a butch for 5+ years before transitioning and still value those experiences and labels, my past relationships have all been lesbian relationships). i personally also dont mind being called straight or transhet, since in terms of attraction and by defintion thats accurate, but i also feel that the term lesbian more accurately describes my experiences and how i think about gender

obviously it differs person to person, but this is how i experience lesbianism as someone whos also a man 100% of the time :)

.

[sojutrait]

do you think it’s weird for straight people to make pride themed posts?

hmmm personally i think its nuanced. if they have good, well represented, lgbtq characters and want to make a pride post i dont see why not. but if its monetized or overly stereotypical then nah keep that shit in the drafts 😭😭

[inutaffy]

thing bout me is sometimes i like just telling people theyre annoying casually on instagram. maybe dont say dumb shit

[myriadsystem]

Seeing a lot of shaving hate posts lately. Like not even posts thats like 'oh you can shave if you want to! Heres how to safely but theres no pressure to do it if you dont want to societys rules are fake do what makes you happy!'

Its like. Mostly ladies and femininely aligned people expressing what i hope is exaggerated but seemingly genuine sadness and anger at people who do shave, also usually towards other femininely aligned people. Like theyve personally suffered some great and tragic loss because a hot babe chose to shave her own legs for her own reasons and its the worst thing to ever happen to them personally and on a global level.

Idk it makes me angry. I shave my legs. (And my pits and my bits too) I dont do it for the fucken patriarchy i dont do it for the vine i dont do it for some made up beauty standard, i do it because i like the feeling. It feels nice to me to shave as part of my shower routine then get out and cover myself in my favourite moisturiser and then roll around in cozy soft pajamas. Thats one of lifes little luxuries and yall can bet a depressed bitch holds on to the tiniest of luxuries whenever she can. If men didnt exist, if the patriarchy didnt exist and i lived in a world of only lesbian ladies i would still fucken shave! If i lived as the only person on the planet id still shave! Because i do it for myself because i enjoy it!

I understand how harmful forcing women to shave to fit an ever changing and unobtainable beauty standard is. I understand how deeply that experience is trained into girls from a young age and i do have many, many problems with the way society is run and the negative self worth effects it often has on younger people who are just figuring out themselves. But yall please stop with the straight up hate and vitriol for people who do chose to shave their own legs. You yell so hard for bodily autonomy then you chuck a hissy fit when a lady choses for her own body to shave it because its not what you would have done, or you think shes trapped in a beauty bubble of mans making. You cant possibly conceive that an adult woman can make her own choices if those choices are too close to the idea of the patriarchy you hold in your mind.

But thats bullshit. The act of shaving isnt the enemy and the lady who shaves herself and minds her own business isnt either. If shes not giving you disgusted looks at your own body hair or pushing her shaving agenda on you, let her live her fucking life maybe without shaming her for something that makes her feels good.

[faggy--butch]

sorry to ramble in your inbox but its kinda fucking me up how "trans man with a cishet boyfriend who misgenders him behind his back" is like seen to be a person to make fun of in the general queer tumblr space instead of a person who is in a vulnerable situation. i know that there is trans men who are also women and there are trans men who are genuinely okay with dating a cis man who considers himself straight but people talking about these hypothetical couples arent talking about these situations but rather about "haha stupid trans man doesnt realize hes dating a bigot"

theres this attitude that the hypothetical cishet boyfriend is actually a conservative so it should be obvious to trans man that he doesnt respect his identity but i feel like its less "oh its obvious that this specific man is a bigot" and more "obviously cishet white men are bigots" and its weird how people laugh at this person instead of acknowledging that even if you are dating a bigot its usually not a big win for you personally. like the bigot cishet boyfriend isnt going to be okay with his trans man boyfriend starting testosterone. like we can sympathize with emotional abuse happening towards other groups but when its gay and mspec trans men its like "oh he should have known that would happen" or "its his fault for dating a bigot"?

of course people have the same making fun of the victim narrative with afab nonbinary people who date cishet men who misgender them [and im sure this bleeds over to affecting all nonbinary people if people arbitrarily decide theyre afab if the nonbinary person refuses to tell them personal information about themselves but the larger narrative always specifies that this is an afab person] and its almost like a "this is what you get for being attracted to men" sort of thing.

and also i theres something to be said about warning people for signs their partner or potential partner doesnt respect their identity but considering i imagine its a common anxiety among trans and nonbinary people who are into that sorta thing to wonder "am i ever going to find someone who loves me and is also accepting of me for being [insert gender here]?" its sort of fucked up for it to be common to basically claim "yea if youre dating a cis man who said he was straight before he started dating you but says he respects your identity hes probably just straight up lying to your face" and then laugh at the person getting misgendered for not knowing they were being misgendered.

anyway sorry for this big ramble i cant even remember specific instances of this to reference so i might seem like im making up a guy to be mad at but i swear this is like a general attitude and almost running joke i see around. anyway. have a good day.

I absolutely see that too, and I think it's a mixture of straight up victim blaming, because oh noo how dare you WANT to date *gasp* cis men

but it come with an intense transandrophobia and exorsexism because there's a lot more sympathy when it comes to cis women dating cishet men "poor things uwu" but when it's trans men or in this case non binary people assumed to be women, it's always "see I told you so" smug superiority. (cis women get this too, because of misogyny obviously, but it's different and worse for trans men) People are just waiting for a chance to be misogynistic and trans men are an acceptable target. This is honestly extra fucked up when we remember that trans men experience some of the highest rates of domestic violence and rape in the community though.

being trans is such a vulnerable place to be in, and a lot of people, trans or not are insecure or just want to be loved, that's normal. A lot of people are willing to accept certain behaviors from their partners that are bad, because of those reasons as well, victim blaming, and ESPECIALLy telling trans men to toughen up or "what did you expect" is apart of the toxic expectations that get placed of trans men as well. I could honestly go on for hours about this. good ask,anon

[drdemonprince]

Hey, I just wanted to thank you for your honesty and willingness to explain how queer spaces can be a lot less transphobic than discourse within the trans community can make it seem. A lot of the past few years for me have been spent closeted out of fear that reactions around me would be uniformly hostile. Things are obviously going to be different for me as a transfem, but I have a much easier time being optimistic now!

I am so glad! Listen, the people who post online all the time about how miserably hard it is to find a place for oneself as a trans person create a kind of reverse survivorship bias. They are the people who have already convinced themselves it's best to forever remain closeted or that forging any kind of accepting community for oneself is impossible. Often, they are also people who once harbored unrealistic fantasies about just strolling up one day into a pre-existing community that was perfect for them, not realizing that we must form our relationships painstakingly one by one (it tends to be the white eggs/unhappy lonely trans people who are most prone to thinking of community in that way). there's plenty of trans guys who are doomers like this too and they really tend to actively encourage one another to remain locked away. it's like incel kind of behavior when it's taken to its most extreme form. sometimes, it can be outwardly really nasty homophobic shit too (especially among "afabs" who complain about "cis gays" never accepting them and being super privileged). in its milder form, it's just extreme trauma brain.

The people you do not hear from so much are the people who are busy out in the world going on dates, acting in plays, getting their asses spanked in dungeons, playing tabletop roleplaying games, and going to farmer's markets with their three also transgender wives. Those are the people who know (that is to say, have learned!) how to interact with their fellow queer people, have spent some time out in the community, and in all likelihood have many rich friendships with cis lesbians, cis gay men, enbies, asexuals, bisexuals, straight ish poly people, and everybody else under our big umbrella.

I don't want to be overly pollyannaish because of course trans people have a tough time, and especially trans women have unfortunately to be on the lookout for really vile transmisogyny. But I think when people are wounded and traumatized by these things, they sometimes make the entire world sound incredibly unwelcoming, which creates a self-limiting feedback loop of isolation and mistrust. That is what trauma does! But it is not the truth. and we only learn otherwise when we give other people the chance to prove our worst fears wrong.

Like, just for an example, this Sunday I was at a silent book club at Dorothy, a gay bar on the west side that skews lesbian but is for everyone. I'd never been there before but it was an absolutely charming experience! Dozens upon dozens of lesbians draped over couches and curled up in chairs with their books, quaffing cocktails, alongside a few random dots of gay and/or trans men. Trans women were just a natural completely unremarkable feature of this environment. I couldn't even tell you how many t girls were there. It would be like counting plus sized girls or butches at this lesbian function. If it's a good lesbian function, there's gonna be a diverse crowd and it won't be weird or a big deal to anyone, they'll just be like any other women there. a lot of the big lesbian events here in Chicago (like Strapped) are organized by trans women, so of course there's a robust trans femme presence there.

And all of these groups at this function were getting laid. the couches were overflowing with women, so many that girls were grabbing pillows to sit on and huddle together with their books on the floor. Girls canoodled and cuddled on couches. I saw a cis alt girl covered in facial piercings flirting with a very prim and proper trans girl who was dressed like a victorian governness. they didnt know one another, but after the silent book club hour was done, they left for a while together, then came back with some food. across from me and my friends, i watched them gathering up on the couch, the space between their bodies slowly closing up into nothing over the course of the evening. they flirted and touched and then left the bar together to (and im no expert on body language but i could pick up on this one) fuck eachothers tits right off.

and of course plenty of other lesbians and wlw paired off or tripled off and had their fun too. again, just like steamworks, fat people, thin people, black and brown people, white people, disabled people, neurodivergent people, trans people, older people, younger people, everybody was there. like any good queer space, it was just a reflection of humanity. there is always more that can be done to make these spaces more broadly accessible to full community. but part of that is by putting ourselves there.

again i dont mean to make it sound like finding and making one's space is easy! especially not for trans women! but I also don't want people to get seduced by the hopeless jadedness that some foment online. there are spaces that some trans women I know will never go to -- even an explicitly trans affirming bookstore like Women and Children First gives many trans women I know bad vibes they cant quite explain but all feel (the store is owned and run by old white cis lesbians, it's not surprising to me that it's a little fucked no matter their good intentions) -- and ive heard people say transmisogynistic stuff at events, particularly from "ill date anybody but cis men" type t boys (my brothers, i hate you). shit can be tough. very tough. but also, the world isn't all uniformly as hostile as it's made out to be. there are people who are desperate to meet you. I hope you will come out to find them.

[communistkenobi]

I think a large problem with how we got to this stage of "man is gender neutral" discourse is that a lot of queer people refuse to engage with feminism. I've been seeing it brought up a lot recently, but it's true. Someone who doesn't see a problem with referring to a trans woman as "dude" probably also doesn't believe in patriarchy to begin with. We need to start doing feminism 101 on tumblr again.

I think this is true and I also think this issue extends to the fact that white liberal queerness is the societally accepted conception of lgbtq issues broadly - the fact that pride flags litter the windowsills of small businesses and banks, that lgbtq merchandise is its own market, that western conceptions of gayness and especially transness are the internationally imposed norm (eg, we are pathological exceptions to cishetero society and should be accepted on the grounds that we are scientifically proven to be legitimate by medical and psychiatric institutions, presented with an awkward flair of “okay so we’re not saying being transgender is a mental illness, but it is caused by a mental illness” + framing of gay people as “they’re just like straight people! they can get married and have children just like you!”). Many many queer people of colour have pointed out how much this predominate western framing of lgbtq identity as a “white person thing” (partially because white queer people are just as racist as non-queer white people, also because of aforementioned western imperialism) puts them at odds with their own communities, giving people in those communities a “rational” reason to oppose lgbtq rights on the grounds of resisting western imperialism. Israel’s pinkwashing is a particularly instructive and stark example of this, positioning lgbtq freedom as being contingent on genociding and destroying Palestine - this doesn’t mean it’s okay to be homophobic obviously, but this sort of imperial imposition of queerness as part of the package of western domination creates the conditions for “rationally opposing” lgbtq rights and equality within colonized communities and ultimately causes intersecting levels of harm for lgbtq people in those communities. You can read decolonizing trans/gender 101 by b binaohan if you want more on the subject, I’ve only read the intro so far but it was very instructive (thank you @/molsno for spreading this link around! - she also has a post with a bunch of transfeminist writings if you want more of that). There's also this video by FD Signifier about Dave Chappelle's transphobia that talks about anti-Blackness in white trans/queer spaces and the intense homophobia and transphobia Black lgbtq people face as a result of this that I found insightful if you want to listen to something instead

ANYWAY, all to say - I think the larger problem is that queerness in western contexts (which tumblr is firmly situated in) is overwhelmingly white and liberal, which means that even if these spaces were to incorporate feminist frameworks in their analysis of oppression, they would be incorporated as liberal feminist frameworks, which are fundamentally transmisogynistic and racist, and fundamentally attached to the imperial project of the west (I recently read this article called Beyond the Coloniality of Gender by Alex Adamson discussing some of the problems with western feminism. they demonstrate this through a case study on western feminist objections to genital cutting in certain African countries + analysis of decolonial trans and intersex feminisms more broadly - if you click "show document" in the upper right hand corner of the page I linked it allows you to access the full article).

I’ve always struggled to articulate the exact issue we're discussing, because at a certain point a lack of knowledge is not to be blamed -the larger issue at hand is that the western political + economic apparatus has incorporated queer assimilation into its project. This does not mean that queer people in the west are safe from homophobia or transphobia (see: current transphobic hysteria across North America and UK in particular), but it does mean that white western queer people have incredible political and rhetorical leverage to dominate these conversations using white liberal analytical frameworks, which can only lead to transmisogynist and white supremacist conclusions about the nature of oppression. I think the only way out of these path-dependent "everyone is oppressed by patriarchy" conversations is a larger decolonial political and social project - part of which necessarily incorporates feminist analysis, but feminist analyses that are decolonial, marxist, and transfeminist in nature, and the only way these frameworks can be comprehensively adopted is through a larger decolonial turn

[theallegedbird]

look this really isn't the kind of post i'd normally make but why the fuck aren't we talking about trans rights in the uk. this is just the latest thing they've thrown at us. it's absolute shit here to be blunt.

on the 19th the uk department of education (DfE) released its guidance for schools and colleges and how they deal with trans kids

its bad. really fucking bad.

but there is some hope in that they are asking for feedback from teachers and school leaders, myself and a friend wrote a document going through why the guidelines are so awful but stopped after focusing on four points since it was. half midnight on the same day this guidance was released. we then gave this to as many teachers as we could before the holiday break and believe me it did a lot, we're working on completing a full version soon

so, uk students, i am begging you to do similar and try persuade your teachers to give feedback (if its safe for you to do so), you'd be surprised how supportive they can be if you break down what this guidance will bring

teacher feedback can be given here, the deadline is the 12th of march 2024

i'm going to go through some of the worst parts of this guidance, keep in mind that according to the education secretary gillian keegan, "this guidance puts the best interests of all children first" utter bullshit obviously

to start off throughout this whole thing they never use the word trans/transgender, just "gender questioning" which feels so fucked up to me

ok so to be blunt essentially what this is going to do is to out any trans kids who want to socially transition to their parents, as well as the fact a school can just. fucking decline any request to socially transition.

"The… guidance clarifies that schools and colleges do not have to, and should not, accept all requests for social transition."

"We are also clear how vital it is that parents are informed and involved in the decisions that impact their children’s lives."

"Parents’ views must also be at the heart of all decisions made about their children – and nowhere is that more important than with decisions that can have significant effects on a child’s life for years to come.”

oh yeah they also connote the whole "trans kids can just get permanent altering medical treatment" bs

on top of that we have this shit

"In exceptional cases where a request to social transition is agreed, children, teachers or staff at a school should not be required to adopt the use of preferred pronouns and there must be no sanction, verbal or otherwise."

so even if you're fucking allowed to socially transition people can straight up misgender you with no fucking consequences. they are legitimately making it so transphobia cant be punished

there is so much more fucked up stuff in this thing as well but you can read that yourself

they are going to kill trans kids if this goes through. they fucking know that. i have the privilege of being out to my parents and them being tolerant but so many closeted trans kids, friends of mine included, wouldn't be able to safely come out even in school. and i know personally how shitty your mental health can get in that situation.

the intent of this guidance is simply put, not in the interest of ‘protecting children’, but in the further marginalisation of an already extremely vulnerable group. they're trying to wipe us out.

uk students, please inform your teachers of what this guidance will do and get them to oppose it in feedback. others just try and spread the word

protect trans kids and fuck the tories.

[royalsnis]

Wanted to touch on this discovery because I believe more people should know about it. Especially Rusty's own friends and fans.

A few months ago, a group of Rusty haters found out that Rusty had liked, drawn, and regularly talked about mpreg artwork.

This on its own is weird, but I personally have no issues with it as it's obviously not harming anyone but it's extremely ironic coming from a woman who regularly claims bisexual/gay trans men are fujoshis or that their reasoning for being a man is rooted in yaoi.

Examples #1 and #2

This is only ONE problem, though. The other was the subject on which she decided to create said mpreg on.

Yup, you got that right. Rusty regularly created and posted her ship art of two REAL MEN, who at the time were both presumably straight and in relationships with women. If that's not delusional, then I don't know what is. (This is 2015, so right before leasebound and when Rusty apparently dove deep into the radfem landscape.)

Her name and quite similar art style were all over these artworks as well, and they were pretty popular at the time too.

There's a few additional discoveries we made that should also be shared.

This FAQ is from her blog when she was around 18-19. You might be thinking, well this was long before she supposedly "peaked" so maybe that's why both her gender and sexuality are different from today.

Sure, you may be right, but Rusty doesn't claim that.

In livestream from a few years ago, Rusty claims to have been a radfem since she was 14 as well as a lesbian, and that she was very isolated from her female peers.

Maybe, just maybe she had a few years later, dropped it and identified with the non disclosed queer label but either way, it's very odd she doesn't touch on this part of her past. Without this prior knowledge, most of her radfem/lesbian fans would assume she was always like this and never participated in the "nasty gendie things" she hated so much.

And to bring focus back to the 1D content. No matter how much Rusty likes to complain about the fetishization of gay cis men, yaoi is at the very least, fictional and of fictional men. She as a grown woman, regularly drew these two real men as gay and got each other pregnant. She's disgusting and deplorable.

I hope her fans see this and understand she's not someone to be trusted in general. I don't know how any of you could excuse what she's done.

[azathothsdreamgrrl]

you see! the thing is! revolutionary girl utena and the riot grrrl movement actually showed up around the same times, but during the early movement riot grrrl ideology was kind of rocky. it mostly focused on white women and rejecting a general upper/middle class upbringing, plus it has a bad history of excluding trans people and overall sparking a really extremist take on feminism that boils down to replacing the straight white men in power with straight white women that still embody a corrupt system.

the movement has improved itself overtime but the thing is that revolutionary girl utena, for all its flaws that i admit it has, kind of hit the ground running with a take on feminism that was ahead of its time. first of all anthy is a rare instance of a dark skinned character in an anime that isn't drawn like a racist caricature, and also one of the only dark skinned protagonists of that era. (dumb) people can debate that she's a flat character but the truth is that the whole story is for her; it's her life being brought a revolution. no one in rgu is white cuz obviously it takes place in japan, but it still rings true that the story aligns with the complexity of intersectional feminism that benefits to all women today, because what utena thought was empowering to all girls actually harms anthy and so on and so forth; even more so, what utena thinks is empowering her is actually hurting her all the same in the long run, turning her into the man she thinks she's fighting against that want them both crushed under it.

rgu also touched on the fact that putting women in a position of power instead of men wouldn't solve anything, because the system itself is rotten. even more mature of it for its time was that the show had a realistic ending where even after utena dedicated her last moments in the show to trying to free anthy, the coffin still fell away from her reach, and the swords turned on her. to akio this was a failure, and this is how a lot of people see fighting against corrupt systems to end: the system always ultimately wins against the individuals, and people lose hope that change can ever happen. however, utena's beliefs inspired anthy to leave ohtori, and then in the movie you see that the student council is given hope to leave as well. change, revolution, is gradual, but that doesn't make it any less worth it. in a lot of punk media i see this ending where the heroes can alone end the oppression in the movie, but that's just not how it works in real life, but there are moments of victory that inspire others to pick off where they leave off, and a better future is imaginable.

i think finally, in regards to the riot grrrl movement, rgu is way more nuanced with gender. you honestly just have to look at the fans to see that utena's gender expression gave trans people who watched rgu more vocabulary to express themselves. more than that though, i think the show was careful with how it approached both gender and femininity. the prince and the bride are both gendered roles, but masculinity and femininity aren't intrinsically toxic for each other. the show doesn't punish utena for being masc, and likewise even after escaping her role as a rose bride, anthy likes dressing fem. it's the way heteronormativity has made us think of these expressions: that masculinity has to come with aggression, and femininity means subservience. neither is a bad thing for the other, and people should be allowed to present how they want, not how they feel their personality means they have to.

all in all i think revolutionary girl utena is a relic for punks and riot grrrls and it isn't considered as such by a lot of people. the show really was ahead of its time. i hope this was coherent!

[ricksanchezbignaturals]

i rewatched s7e3 and the weird sort of straight washing that happened with unity was worse than i realized in my first 1 and a half viewings. so im here to be a little bit more of a hater lol.

okay so like fuck this bitch in particular

now, i understand that unity has appeared in the comics which i haven't read so it's possible there's some lore there that idk about, but here's the deal as i understand it and why this specific alien acting like the face of unity bugs me so much. this alien is part of a species that, as of the episode in season 2, was very recently assimilated by unity. so like im not sure why there's so much focus placed on her specifically. having her act as a representative of sorts made sense in the first episode, she was a president on the newly assimilated planet that rick and the kids were visiting. but like, that's it, right? it doesn't make sense to me why she would be any more important than any of the other, what? trillions of life forms unity has under its belt? like the only reason for her to be here at all is to be recognizable to the audience, which like, fine. i think it's a little dumb, but whatever. the problem isn't having her as a symbol (personally i think it'd be cooler to not have an entity like unity tied down to being primarily represented through one body but i digress), the problem is that she's treated like more than that in this episode.

this is a part i didn't notice until my rewatch that really irked me.

these are concurrent shots from the scene when rick shows up and starts spraying unity. we see it in virginia telling rick to take it easy through the body of this human, then we see it continuing the conversation from its spaceship in the body of the alien. i am like super not a fan of the implications of that. this alien is not supposed to be unity any more than any one of my cells is me, but here it's depicted as though whenever unity does something in any of its bodies, it's coming from this lady. and like, that'd be super lame even if it wasn't an obvious womanification of a nongendered entity.

now im no english major so i don't have an elegant transition to put here, but yes, it is time to talk about pronouns. yeah yeah, ik, trans person gets hung up on pronouns, bite me okay, it's relevant. i went back and watched the first unity episode to be sure id remembered correctly, and yes, in that episode nobody uses gendered pronouns for unity. morty says "they" which seems more to be referring to a number of bodies, and other than that, people mostly say "unity" or "it". as for the new episode i noticed rick using nongendered pronouns twice

but after that he goes with she/her for the rest of the episode

and yeah, i think that is pretty disappointing. i didn't catch that "it" until my rewatch, but the use of "them" did make me really happy but then everybody started she/hering it. the combination of all that emphasis being put on a female body and people calling unity she so much makes for an episode that manages to be significantly less queer than the one that came out in 2015. it feels weirdly cowardly after that "we're all a little gay" bit in the last episode and doesn't inspire much confidence in me regarding rick's relationships with nonwomen. like stuff can be gay if it's for a joke, but there's more money on the line now than back in season 2, so rick's ex lover needed straightening up.

idk. i still like the episode because im easy and focusing on rick's mental health and relationships always makes me happy, but man, i am certainly not happy with how they handled unity. they really did it dirty, watered it down to being pretty much just another alien lady.

(also to be clear, i am not trying to shit on the writers here. obviously idk exactly what went on, but im pretty comfortable placing the blame squarely on execs)

[davidthephoneguy]

A little (mostly Dialtown) rant of my own

Ok first of all you all need to calm down, I'm goin on this rant despite not currently being in the dialtown fandom but I was back around when the game first came out. I just feel like I gotta ask you to be calm because I know how agressive people can be online with that shield on anonymity. I also do not hate dialtown or Dogman nor do I blame them for said issues that will be stated.

Dialtown as a whole does pretty obviously have a problem about representation of fem/fem presenting characters especially in the fandom side. As a previous rant stated before most fem characters are either glossed over in favour of male/masc presenting ones, such as with the main dateables. It even extends to side characters which feels rather disheartening. Now I get why its mainly the male/masc presenting ones who get attention, I must highlight the fact that I am a Bi-Ace Transman and I tended to focus on Oliver and Randal over Karen so I was part of the problem on that part. So i get the gender serotonin of drawing them but I hope you can also see how it means that for example, Karen is almost completely overlooked. I would see myself in them because of the shared gender, I really do understand why this has been happening. You are not evil for doing this, that is not what this rant is about in the slightest. Like the previous rant before stated the game doesn't pass the Bechdal test (Which if you are unaware is a media test which requires two fem characters to talk to eachother about anything other then a man, already an extremely low bar to pass) which Dialtown does not pass. It's completely valid to have reservations about that as it is an overall problem with media at large. Media at large is still a white straight cis male dominated space and needs more diversity in all ways. Dialtown as a whole is a good game and has a diverse cast which is wonderful and amazing to see. The only issue is how some are highlighted more then others or demonized in a way that lines up with misogyny (Such as with Mingus' behavior being villainized by the fandom while Stabby and Shooty doing the same thing being ok and lighthearted in the eyes of the fandom which from an outside view just looks like misogyny I am sorry folks. If the only factor in if you like or dislike a characters actions is because they are a woman is misogyny even if they're cis or trans, misogyny is just the word for discrimination in this way) Pointing this out doesn't mean an attack on anyone, pointing out an issue is meant to bring attention to said issue so it can be improved or fixed. The previous person who I have been referencing and paraphrasing here (who I am not going to @ as they don't need more direct harassment) was slightly attacked for having a rant, yes everyone is entitled to their opinion but that does not give either side the right to actively attack the other. Please remain diplomatic.

People are allowed to highlight issues, if we don't then they won't ever get fixed. We're meant to stick together and fix things together, not attack eachother. Thats what people like terfs want us to do, they want us to tear eachother apart so that they get what they want, our destruction. We have to stand together with the things we love. My apologies for how long this ended up being but I just had to get it out of my head. Just my thoughts as a transman/voidrabbit on the topic

[lilrobotman]

Hey trans mascs on HRT who are feeling hair loss p hard: rosemary oil may be a good option if you want to promote a bit of new growth and keep your hair nice and healthy. I've had decent results using it for about 4 months now, parts of my hair that were thinning have thickened back up a fair amount

There are a few studies showing that rosemary oil is about as effective as other hair loss treatments like here and here, but it's definitely a field needing more study, though I've seen plenty of testimonies from others backing up its efficiency (me included!)

Some things of note:

-Obviously I'm only speaking from personal experience and not everyone is the same! I can not speak to how effective this will be for you.

-Like with hair loss treatments, if you stop using it, your hair will return to its former state. However the great thing with rosemary oil is that it takes forever to go through a bottle. You only need 5-10 drops per application and you only need to use it a couple times a week. Most bottles of rosemary essential oil cost about 10 dollars, which I find to be a decent price considering how long it can last.

-Additionally, rosemary oil seems to only work on thickening up pre-existing and thinning hair, not make new hair (at least for me). My high peaks have hardly gained any new growth but what I do have has thickened up quite a bit.

If you want to try rosemary oil, please make sure to only use it 1-3 times a week and mix it with a shampoo or carrier oil (jojoba and coconut are good ones). Rosemary oil is really strong. Dont apply it to you bare scalp without diluting it a bit. Make sure you scrub it into your scalp for a couple minutes, and most importantly, be patient. Like many hair loss treatments, it takes about 4-6 months to really start seeing a change. I still suggest looking into more detailed application descriptions as applying it correctly is rather important, applying straight up rosemary oil to your hair will probably make things worse.

Additionally, these tips are coming from a white guy with cowlicks and stiff hair, if you're someone with a different hair texture, please make sure to research what others like you may have said about applying rosemary oil. Always use a carrier unless the product you get says otherwise!

DO NOT USE IT FOR BEARD GROWTH. The androgen, dihydrotestosterone (DHT), is what promotes male pattern baldness but it also promotes beard growth. Supposedly (and this is not a claim I have 100% verified as scientifically true but I've seen this explanation used quite frequently) rosemary oil helps block the production of DHT. So using it on your beard will likely not help it.

Please know this is a post with good intentions, I'm not trying to give anyone false hope. My hair loss really made me stressed and dropped my confidence a lot. Some hair loss medicines have been known to cause trans mascs to start their period again and their overall efficiency is flaky, so I didn't want to try any of them. Rosemary oil has been very helpful for me and it could be for you! The worst thing the oil can do is make your hair smell nice, even if it doesnt give you a lions mane. Just remember to be patient and do some research about applying before starting :]

[gemsofgreece]

Hello! Firstly, I wanted to thank you for the work you do on this blog. My mother's side is Greek and came to the US around WW2, and as I've gotten older and tried to learn about Greek culture, I've found that it's hard to find sources that aren't inundated with American pop-history. It's been really lovely being able to learn more from your blog for the past couple weeks.

Second is my question -- re: the pop history issue, I've noticed that people in the American queer community have a knack for "reclaiming" figures in history and mythology without always having an abundance of evidence for their claims. And like, I'm trans. Obviously the idea of some of things being true is cool, but it also feels disingenuous sometimes. Do you know of any good resources or books written by actual queer Greeks about either their contemporary experiences, or the history of queer people in Greece that isn't just conjecture?

Thank you again! Have a great day :)

Hello! It makes me so happy that you found my blog suitable to inform yourself on this part of your ethnic / cultural background. I hope the blog will keep being a useful source of information.

Because I am not going to lie, the way Greek history and culture, more like a snippet of it, has been almost forced into American pop culture is indeed through a disingenuous conjecture. Honestly, it's not so much a matter of accuracy per se. It's more that a niche piece of the culture has been taken and presented as almost the entirety of this culture, which eventually leads to tremendously false impressions, no matter how earnestly this niche part is explored. There is also the tendency to shape ambiguous evidence into unquestionable conviction.

I will attempt to explain why this can be a problem. Let's take the axiom - because it has reached the lengths of being treated as an axiom - "Ancient Greece was gay or Greece is gay or Greek culture was gay culture or Greece is / was a gay haven". If we really study Greek history and culture in its entirety, in a span of 3,500 years or more if we also take into acount the pre-Greek civilizations which eventually helped produce the Greek, while the existence of gay people (i.e Sappho), non-straight sexual practices (i.e erotic amphoras), ambiguous literary relationships (i.e Achilles & Patroclus?) and varied expressions of sexual desire observed especially in male deities are 100% well attested and recorded, they still comprise overall a very tiny part of the Greek civilization. Whereas it is often portrayed in western pop culture as the very essence of Greek civilization, exploration and studies of sexuality and gender identity throughout its history could amount to maybe a 1-5% of all documented knowledge associated to the Greek ethnos, its history and its legacy. Think of it this way; Greece happened to be in the epicenter of many formative achievements of humanity; spreading, contributing or improving on science, arts, extant religions and linguistics. It has been an area extremely ravaged by war because it has a very strategic position on the map. It has been in the core of three of the world's largest empires and it has been positively or negatively influential to all three (and the generator of one of them). There are so many things, struggles and achievements, to study and explore and draw from as part of your identity, that a constant foreign obsession and trivilization and sensualization of the sexual practices of people long gone eventually will start sounding disingenuous or lacking or even demeaning. Just like every individual aspires to be acknowledged and respected for more than just their sexual or gender identity (i.e skills, feelings, talents, achievements, personality), it is the exact same with culture and heritage. People want their culture to be appreciated in its entirety and not for a super niche area that is also exaggerated, if not exploited to serve foreign agendas, trends and marketing (because let's be real, not all have noble representation motives).

Okay, now I have to ask: do you know Greek? Because I can recommend you some sources, however Americans do not translate Greek works unless they are from 750 BC :)

Here's a quick heads-up:

The Greek society is a pseudopuritan society - one where people act like puritans when it comes to judging others but not at all when it comes to themselves. The gay male community has by far the biggest visibility nowadays. Lesbians come second. Other sexual orientations follow i.e bi, poly, pan. Gender (trans, non-binary, fluid etc) identities have less visibility. Asexuals also have near non-existent visibility. Most non-het non-cis people face problems in their families rather than in their studies or in urban environments. Non-cis people, especially AMAB people, might also face hardship in the workplace (like not getting easily hired).

Because the society is pseudopuritan, it tolerated and embraced and worshipped several LGBT people, except if they attempted to communicate their experience. Great composers and authors were openly gay and Greeks knew it and loved them, because they didn't explicitly involve their sexual identity in their work or because they didn't expose the pathogenies of the Greek society. If they had done that, the reception could have been different. Because of all these reasons, most of my sources will be from the perspective of gay cis men (the most visible LGBT+ community) and it will be mostly the great work and legacy they left behind, rather than their explicit documentation of the experience of living as LGBT+ in Greece.

LGBT poets and authors:

Constantine Cavafy (1863 - 1933), one of our best poets. This can be useful to you because his works are actually translated in English.

Napoleon Lapathiotis (1888 - 1944), openly gay in such times, he wrote a lot of erotic poetry.

Augoustos Korto (1979 - ), a married gay man, successful writer and activist, he has written extensively on the topics of death, depression, motherhood and love, often drawing from personal experience.

Kostas Tachtsis (1927 - 1988), poet, distinguished author and activist for gay rights during the Colonel dictatorship in the '70s. He suffered in his life and in his death as well. His murder has not been solved yet. He has written an autobiography and numerous novels with autobiographical elements. He was gay, either cross-dressing cis or maybe trans or non-cis (we don't know that back in time how exactly he identified) and had also been a sex worker for some time.

Napoleon Lapathiotis

Music:

Music won't give you direct information however it could be a way to bond with people you could connect with over similar experience.

Manos Hadjidakis (1925 - 1994), one of our two greatest composers and a rare genius, was openly yet "discreetly" gay, not out of shame but because privacy on all aspects of the human experience was absolutely essential and sacred to him. He was also an Oscar winner, although he would hate me for saying this (he threw his Oscar in the trashcan). Besides listening to his music, I would recommend watching interviews or listening to excerpts from his radio shows, because of the ease with which he could challenge anyone's intellectual capacity.

Sotiria Bellou (1921 - 1997), a lesbian or perhaps bisexual woman, she is worshipped for her unique voice, which became the ultimate symbol of the heavy-duty (underground at the time + now part of UNESCO's cultural heritage) rembetiko music genre.

TV Shows with representation:

Maestro in Blue on Netflix, a big part of the story is the romance of a gay couple suffering in oppressive families in the province

Milky Way, one of the main characters is pansexual and non-binary, and the actor is gay IRL. There is also a brief lesbian romance or a side narrative of supressed female homo- or bi- sexuality. This show will soon get in some international platform but I don't remember which one (not netflix), so keep it in mind.

Milky Way

YouTube:

There are a lot of LGBT+ people in Greek YouTube but my faves are:

ΚΡΙΜΑ by ZoePreTV: Zoe is a lesbian or bi herself (not sure but I know she's openly in a relationship with a woman) and she makes lengthy very informative quality podcasts with celebrities or everyday people, often belonging to marginalized groups, and they talk about their experiences. If you can understand Greek, this might be the best source for what you ask. I watched a fantastic episode with a trans woman and sex worker talking about her life. It is one of the greatest podcast episodes I have ever watched, hands down.

Eponimos. Zoe's best friend, who is an openly gay man, although he approaches matters of sexuality very delicately as he values his privacy a lot. He doesn't talk often about such matters (recently he did) but his channel is awesome for his lighthearted humour and the maturity of his positions. I love watching his content.

The podcast I mentioned.

LGBT+ Magazine: ANTIVIRUS. ANTIVIRUS also has this list with recent queer literature, featuring both Greek and foreign writers. Here is the link. It's in Greek though, like everything above...

Art: Yannis Tsarouhis (1910 - 1989), one of the most influential and successful Greek artists. He painted a variety of themes, he was inspired and developed Greek folk and Byzantine art, however he was also particularly notable for his love for the masculine physique and he established the classic image of the "Greek sailor" in art, theater and cinema internationally.

A great photo of Tsarouhis in his atelier.

I wouldn't consider myself well-versed in the topic, so I invite anyone who knows sources that could also ideally be easily accessible to the Anon, to give some recs in the comments. From my side, Anon, hopefully I was of any help.

[orion4ever]

hi so im the person who requested the derren/outcasted reader and AHHH it was great!!! thank you so much!!!

i wanted to request another ren fic, this like with a trans masc reader

basically its just ren comes out to the reader as trans and then we’re just like “wait your trans? me too!”

have a good day or night! don’t rush and take care of yourself! thank you!

Author’s Note: Hello! I am glad you liked it , I was worried I didn’t portray her correctly! I hope you enjoy this one as well ^^ Although since we didn’t get much info about Renee and her transition for now, I wrote this under the assumption that she has warmed up and mellowed out over time.

Also I totally wrote this with them being in high school but then remembered that in Step 3, they are probably not in high school anymore so I changed it to be a local community college.

Pairing: Renee Murray x TransMasc! MC

🥾🍁

Renee was worried about people’s opinions of hers changing when they found out that she was trans.

Would she be seen as somewhat hypocritical to her younger self? Would people still want to be friends even if she was a girl? How would they treat her now?

While she is way more happy and content now truly understanding her feelings and identity, coming out is a very nerve-wracking experience.

You had been the first to know, of course. You have been Renee’s friend(and crush) for a long time and she felt that no matter what; you would be there.

She just wasn’t expecting what came next…

The school day just ended, you were packing up your backpack to go home when you felt a hand hold on to your shoulder. When you turned around, it was Ren; her newly dyed red hair glimmering in the classroom's fluorescent lights.

“MC,” Renee greeted, her mouth appearing to smile but her eyebrows were worried.

“Oh, Hey Renee” you greeted in return, slinging your heavy backpack over your shoulder. “We’re still hanging out at the bridge today?” You asked, tilting your head towards your friend.

“Uh. Yeah, obviously… Let’s hurry. I-.” She paused on her words before continuing. “I want to tell you something important.” She finished, feeling more sure of yourself.

“Something important? Important enough that you can’t tell me here?” You had teased a little bit, moving towards the door while Renee followed with a nervous chuckle.

“I want to tell you somewhere more private, so yeah.” She answered, walking out the classroom door and through the hallway with them.

“I understand.” You nodded.

After crowd-surfing and dodging other students, the both of you got off campus and made your way over to the familiar patch of woods near the hiking trail.

While the trip felt short for you, to Renee; this trip over to the bridge alcove felt like hours. She overthought your reaction to her coming out as a girl and played around with her gloves to distract herself.

“Is there something wrong?” You had asked, stopping in front of the diner on the way to the remote bridge. “You’ve been a little restless..?” You added, looking gently at her.

Her unease lessened when she noticed your genuine expression, appreciating how supportive you are.

“I will be ok... It's just related to what I wanted to tell you.” Renee reassured, who started walking again.

“You’re kinda worrying me a little bit, Ren” you admitted, following a bit behind her. “Is it something bad?” You asked.

Renee paused a little bit but answered, peaking over her shoulder at you. “Depends on what you think is ‘bad’..”

You didn’t reply, you didn’t have a clue what this secret information could be.

Finally, the two of you made it, Renee got comfortable and leaned on the bridge. While she didn’t say it straight up ;she was hinting for you to join her side.

You stepped towards her but didn’t lean on the bridge. “Ren, What's wrong?” You asked again. “Did something happen?”

Renee looked nervous but replied “No, nothing happened. I have something I need to tell you.” She took a deep breath before continuing.

“I need to be honest, I have been having identity issues; for most of my life at this point.”

She admits, her hand moving towards her nape. 

“After a while, I think I finally get it.” Renee then moved her gaze away from the bridge and faced you.

“I am a girl. I’m trans..”

The woods went silent, the both of you staring at each other. Renee teared up a little, really worried that she was about to lose you over this. Before the silent woods could swallow her, you replied.

“Oh! Me too!” You chuckled. Renee went deadpanned, her hand that was resting on her nape fell to her side.

“what.” She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, Uh. Not the girl part, I trans too!” You elaborated with an equally nervous smile. Renee, just in case asked.

“Do you accept me?” You looked over surprised that she would think you wouldn’t.

“Of course! This is awesome, I am really happy that you finally understand yourself!”

You said supportively.

“I can say I understand too. I guess we both get to start this new journey together huh?” You smiled.

“When did you know you were a guy?” Renee asked, acknowledging that you came out too.

“A while ago. I just didn’t find a moment to tell you.” You shrugged a little, shoving your cold hands in your jacket pockets.

The two of you stood there in silence, Renee turned back towards the side of the bridge. You joined by her side. Renee sheepishly put her pale hand in your pocket to hold your hand, which you held back.

“Is this ok?” Renee asked, side-eyeing you.

“Yeah.” You said quietly with a little blush.

It was silent again, but there was more question that you needed an answer to.

“What do wanna be referred to now? Still Ren?” You side-eyed her back.

“Call me Renee.” She answered with a smile.

“Okay, Renee” you replied for the last time, rubbing your thumb on her hand.

[toasterbunnicula]

Mass Effect Character Sexualities because I want to project

(Partly headcanon, bi-ased, personal opinion)

Ashley: straight, formerly homophobic until she realized that most of her Normandy crew mates were gay

Garrus: bi energy, its simply unfair to our gay guys for such an amazing and hot character to not go both ways. Ive also seen too much Garrus/Thane/Shepard fanart to see him any other way

Liara: obviously bi, I hc that she was confused when she first encountered homophobia because it simply doesn’t exist in asari culture (closest thing is the asarixasari stigma)

Wrex: for some reason I see him as bi? I have no idea where I got this but I want to see a tough, old warrior casually mentioning being into both men and women and not caring at all about it (even though I think krogan culture probably wouldn’t approve)

Tali: for my sake as a helpless bi simp, I see her as under the umbrella, but doesn’t realize it. Like me before I came out, Tali would say “yeah she’s really pretty and I want to hang out with her and hug her and stare at her but I’m not gay or anything.” You are. You are gay. I think it would be in character for her to completely miss the fact that she’s into girls as well as men

Joker: straight. The kind of straight to make jokes about his friends’ sexualities, but not mean anything by it. He goes to pride every June with his wife EDI (who I will get to)

Jacob: I honestly can’t believe that he was originally intended to be bi, I just can’t see him into men unless I squint. It’s hilarious that they tried to make his male romance more like Brokeback Mountain so it’d be accepted

Miranda: I’ve seen a headcanon on Pinterest about Miranda having internalized homophobia because it doesn’t line up with her view of genetic perfection, something she’s established to be insecure about. I think it would make perfect sense for her character. I think it’s easy to see her as a lesbian practicing het-comp, especially with how awkward her initial flirting with Shepard is, but there are more scenes in her romance that feel authentic than there are that feel performative, so I’m inclined to say she is bi/pan/omni/etc.

Mordin: I’m pretty sure his asexuality is canon. I also think that he’s aromantic as well, but can objectively assess beauty/attractiveness well. For example, his film noir short story in the Citadel DLC involves a hookup with Aria. I personally believe that is him saying “yeah, she’s attractive, and if I were into women, I’d smash”

Zaeed: he gives off straight uncle who would punch a homophobe for you but otherwise doesn’t know how to interact with you after you’ve come out and tries a little too hard to acknowledge your sexuality but it’s definitely well-meaning (think the “anyone could be they!” scene from Brooklyn Nine-Nine)

Grunt: straight and supports his bi parents (Shepard and Garrus/Thane/Tali/Liara), wears rainbows at Pride for them, and regularly headbutts homophobes

Jack: I’m forever salty about them erasing her pansexuality. Also she and Miranda should’ve kissed

Kasumi: also gives off pan energy. She definitely feels like the type to not care about gender at all- as long as they’ve got muscles, that’s all that matters to her

Thane: pan energy

Samara: as established, Samara is bisexual

Legion: ace, non-binary (goes with people using he/him based on its masculine voice, pronouns are they/it)

Kelly: she said so herself, she doesn’t care about race/species or gender, all that matters is the person 💖💛💙

EDI: something about Sentient AI Who People Initially Don’t Trust Until She Gets A Humanoid Body That People Can Better Associate With Her reads to me as a trans allegory. Obviously, she’s not trans, but the vibes are there. Many times, people are suspicious of trans women until they transition and pass more as cis, which is similar to EDI’s story. She learns more about herself after her body changes, and others start to appreciate her more and have an easier time referring to her with she/her pronouns. As for her sexuality, she doesn’t seem to lean any particular way to me. She doesn’t seem like the type who’d use labels, even though it would make sense for her to “categorize” herself. I’d say she’s unlabelled- definitely into men, with her relationship with Joker

James: as much as I wish we could get gay gym bro representation, James is great as he is, being a masculine straight guy who’s best friends are openly gay (Cortez) and bi (Shepard)

Traynor: lesbian (canon), definitely into women who can crush her head under their heel but also has a dominant side herself

Cortez: gay (canon)

Diana: that annoying and popular bi girl you secretly had a crush on but didn’t want to because she was intimidating and popular