#and always thinking about these fictional worlds that have brought me so much more happiness than this one

[glitterghost]

Feeling the ace-solation tonight.

[silaswritesthings]

MORE SCARA X YANDERE! FEM! READER OLEASE‼️‼️

Summary: You wish you could wish Wanderer a happy birthday but how could you without revealing the extensive research you performed on his background to be able to possess sensitive information such as his birthdate?

Starring: Wanderer/Scaramouche

Genre: Yandere,

Warnings: stalking, reader is a Yandere

Author’s note: i get really happy when i get asks so thank you sm!! I would’ve posted this yesterday but life happens. Enjoy!!

Word count: 1.3k

A good book remains a good book whether it’s displayed before the eyes of the most respected curators of the world or among millions of books in a local library. To you, Wanderer was a good book. He was an arrangement of words and colours, brought together to form his masterpiece that he kept hidden under pages of silence and mystery.

There was nobody who knew of him who felt like they knew enough, and among those people was you; who knew the most about him but not enough. It would never be enough.

“What will it be this time?” Wanderer said from beside you. “Psychology, true crime or crime fiction?”

You wanted to be a bit greedy, to keep him in a decorative box in your room only for your eyes to see. Why? Because Wanderer was beautiful; beautiful in the way he handed you your library books as you checked them out like he was giving you treasures beyond human imagination. He was beautiful in the way he spoke about various things he’s read about, sometimes his voice would lull you into a trance during the entirety of his rants about the lack of historical accuracy in fiction, and you would hang onto every single one of his words until the sudden snap of his fingers bring you back to reality.

He was too perfect, therefore Wanderer was uncontainable. So much that you wished to contain him. For the time being, you could only do that by taking pictures of him while he wasn’t looking.

“Surprise me.” You said after feigning contemplation. You leaned against the shelf behind you and waited to see what he would do next.

He narrowed his eyes. “No.”

“But I want to extend my reading palate.” You challenged. He watched you for a second and another before sighing and asking you to follow him and so you did.

Upon your arrival in another library section, Wanderer had presented you with two recommendations; with one book in each hand he began to explain the contents of both books.

His voice was quiet, as expected since you were in a library, but you did not miss the way his voice would lower whenever someone walked by. You noticed a long time ago that Wanderer was a very private person but you didn't think there was anything wrong with your display of affection, it was only admiring someone with limited boundaries. He did, however, have rather strict boundaries and you knew there must be some you've violated or crossed by now, you've been stalking him… No, you've been watching him. Admiring him. You like him so you're more observant with him than with others, because he's interesting. Is this how he sees it as well?

“The latter sounds very interesting.” You said, after he concluded his explanation, pushing down your moral dilemma. He hummed in acknowledgment and pushed the book against your chest as he walked past you to return to the front of the library, but just before your shoulders brushed he paused, regarding you with a gaze you couldn't perceive.

“Are you free this evening?”

Your heart leaped to your throat and you were unable to think of an appropriate reply; I always have time for you- no, that sounds too desperate. What about ‘time with you is time well spent’- no, that's too artificial!

“Yes- I mean- sure, yeah.” You glared at the ground because your anxiety was very easy to pick up on. Your thoughts shifted from your embarrassment to the pressure on your chest decreasing, Wanderer had let go of the book and was making his way to the front of the library. His ears were bright red and you wished you hadn't forgotten your camera at home that morning.

________

Pictures of Wanderer in various places and scenarios were scattered all over your bedroom walls, each picture was surrounded by at least two sticky notes with your thoughts and observations concerning the picture written down in the neatest handwriting you could muster.

There was the picture of Wanderer when he first started working at the library, his shoulders were sunken as if there was an invisible force weighing him down. The two notes accompanying this picture pointed out how this was a week after he moved here, and the fatui were rumoured to have increased their activity because they were in search of someone.

You scanned a few other shots from that day, the urge to just watch the original surveillance video from the day was difficult to overcome. Not Nearly as difficult as it was to gather all the information you had on Wanderer, from how he had been running from the fatui: a Snezhnayan organisation deeply rooted in the political and economic systems of various nations, to how he was of inazuman origins and closely related to the Raiden Shogun- but you didn't know how. Not yet, at least.

Your wondering thoughts halted when you came across a picture you took the previous week; Wanderer looking directly into the camera with an irritated expression. You couldn’t fight off your smile, it was the first time you had taken a picture of him with his consent and this was progress. You treasured this picture because it was evidence of how far your relationship with him had come. Will he allow you to take more pictures of him like this? Or even better, will he open up to you about his past soon?

Speak of the devil, your phone rang and when the screen flashed on, the caller ID belonged to Wanderer and so you picked up.

“Hello?”

“Is there anything you’re allergic to?” No time for formalities, this was the Wanderer you knew and loved.

“Not any that I know of.”

“Great, then let’s agree to meet in 40 minutes.” Wanderer said, but you knew this was only him being considerate of you- or at least you assumed as much, because you could hear the hum of various conversations in the background. He definitely wasn’t home.

“That’s perfect,” you said, but your voice had quieted as you scanned his pictures in your room. How would he react if he found out about this… quality of yours? Would he be upset? Would he hate you? Those possibilities could scare anyone, but you’ve found yourself being drawn to all of Wanderers reactions whether good or bad. What you really disliked was no reactions from him at all- or perhaps dislike was too strong a word; could you really dislike anything about him?

Your gaze shifted to a picture you contemplated burning because of how terrible it looked, you had taken it in a rush but despite the terrible quality, it grew on you just because it was Wanderer. There was no need for better reasoning, that was more than enough.

Wanderer’s voice had softened when it filtered through the previously quiet line. “What’s on your mind?”

You hummed as you mulled over your response, “I’m just wondering if there was any special reason you wanted to hang out today.” By now, your attention had shifted to the middle of the wall beside your door where you had stuck a note written in bold black letters ‘3rd of Jan’: his birthday. Today. He hadn’t told anyone the real date of his birth, probably because he was trying to hide his previous identity as ‘the balladeer’ but no Information about him would ever be out of reach for you.

“There’s no special reason,” he mumbled. “Just felt like spending time with a friend today.”

The corners of your mouth tilted, his voice had always sounded pretty and no matter how many times you heard it you would never get tired of it.

“Then allow me to get prepared.” You finally said, ignoring the flutter in your chest.

“I trust that you’ll be here on time, 34 minutes left.” His voice was back to being monotone and sarcastic.

This filled you with amusement, and you decided to tease, “You trust me?”

He went quiet for a second and another, then finally he replied. “I always have.” He ended the call.

You held your phone to your chest as you gazed at his pictures again and thought, would he still trust you after seeing your room like this?

It didn’t matter. Even if he didn’t know you knew… Happy birthday, Wanderer <3

[oops-all-concrete]

Hi! I have a request for bg3 head-cannons. These entail Tav not being able to read and the group all separately trying to teach them how to. (I feel like gale would be the master at this). Thank you!❤️

Aw, I love this ask!! Thank you for the request, this is genuinely so sweet and is spawning like a million ideas in my head. (I have a Tav I always imagine being illiterate)

BG3 companions react to; Tav not knowing how to read!

No content warnings, just fluff and sweetness for the most part. Potentially minor spoilers for certain characters? But nothing major/important.

Lae'zel -

She's a little surprised, given how old Tav is. She knew how to read Tir'Su slate by age 6. Knew how to read and write common by 8. Learned a few other languages by 12. For Tav to not know their own language in writing is concerning. She wouldn't have the patience to teach them, but she would go out of her way to read out signs and plaques to Tav. They need to get by somehow and she's at least got the patience for that.

Shadowheart -

"Oh? Was this not a necessary skill where you grew up?" She's quite open minded. She understands not all societies have a lean on literacy, as much as she couldn't imagine living like that. She asks if they'd like to know and reads to them in the evenings. She only has some chappy romance novels and crime fiction, but she likes the books, so she's happy to read to them. It's a slow process, but she's patient.

Wyll -

He's stunned. He knows there's plenty of people who simply can't obtain the skill due to a number of reasons, dyslexia, bad vision, blindness entirely, but Tav should know if they can learn. He's quick to get as much reading material as he can find and invite Tav to little lessons. He's a wonderful teacher, praises every new word, applauds the reading of a sentence and smiles every time Tav reads something on their own during an adventure.

Karlach -

She's the least bothered. A little surprised, but not judging. "Eh, I can't ride any mounts or hold my breath for more than 20 seconds at a time. I've lived, so will you" She shrugs it off so easy. She does however keep that information to herself if she's the only one Tav has told. It's not worth judging, she refuses to look down on anyone for it, but she worries Gale, Astarion or Lae'zel will be critical and perhaps even mean about it? And Tav doesn't need that. Mama K's got you.

Gale -

He's not critical, but he is interested. Gale might have a bit of an ego and thinks the world of his skills, but his mother wouldn't let him leave the house if he thought less of others for not having skills. He does offer to teach, but he asks in a very particular way. "I'd be happy to teach you, should you wish to learn. It's fine if you don't though. Just tap me and point and I'll translate for you" He says, calm and even. Deep down, he is concerned, but stays level headed. Tav deserves that much.

Astarion -

"What, did your folks just get lazy? Ugh, what swine." He's offended on Tavs behalf. He thinks it's atrocious they don't have such a basic and essential skill and can't believe whoever/wherever Tav was brought up just didn't help them. So naturally, he pulls out some of his own reading material and finds some easier things during travel if he can. He'll be damned if he's going to let them sit there and not know what a warning sign is.

Bonus! The elder folks 💕

Halsin -

"Ah, you need not be ashamed. Nature never intended writing, as helpful as it can be." He smiles. He's happy to teach, but doesn't mind if Tav has no desire to learn. He thinks it would be helpful, but otherwise thinks nothing of it. He will read things if asked without question, but makes no other comments.

Jaheira -

"Cub, as long as you can remember what I say and know how to say what you're saying, I couldn't care less...but if you want to learn, you can always tell me or Halsin...or the wizard, Gale. They'd be happy to teach I'm sure" She just shrugs and keeps moving.

Minsc -

"Warriors have no need for words anyhow, my friend! We can just speak with our hands and feet...in combat!" With some encouraging squeaks from Boo.

[lujingheswife]

i’ll find you, you’ll find me.

summary: you found yourself in the world of haikyuu, and spent time with your favourite character.

featuring: your favourite character!

word count: 1536

cw: gn!reader, you teleported into the world of haikyuu, happy ending, angsty in between but i’m a fluff writer so dont worry, intentional lowercase, not proofread

author’s notes: wrote this in june 2020 !! found it in my drafts so might as well publish it hehe

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

it hadn't been long since you found yourself in another dimension — the haikyuu dimension. it felt like a dream to you, yet whatever you did you just wouldn't wake up.

was it really real? you thought to yourself, pacing around your fictional room not missing the sight of your uniform in front of you.

every haikyuu fan has a favourite character, just like you. you were indeed surprised at the sight of the uniform of your favourite school hanging neatly against the wall. sighing, you had no choice but to wear your uniform and head to school.

you realized your character was simply an average student in the school, so you need not to care about your popularity or loneliness. you were curious as it seemed to be your first day of school since it was the start of a new school year. since you're a first year, you didn't have to worry about friends.

yet your curiosity overwhelmed you and your legs automatically found their way towards the school's volleyball gym. before you could process your head, a familiar voice called out to you, “hello there.”

your head snapped up as your gaze met a pair of familiar eyes, one you had always admired his appearance on screen. it felt like a dream, realizing your favourite character actually talking to you — in front of you — in your favourite anime dimension. or was it really a dream...?

“hello?”

you flinched, shaking your head furiously before stuttering a reply, “h-hello! i'm sorry — u-uhm, is it okay if i apply as a team manager?”

again, you totally did not think twice before uttering that sentence.

he stared at you with curiosity, his gaze not breaking away from yours. after an unexpected staring competition, he smiled. “sure — i'll get the form immediately,” he replied. afterwards he lead you into the gym, showing you around on the way to fetch the application form introducing himself at the same time.

‘of course i know who you are,’ you thought to yourself. your eyes never left his figure, admiring his profile. for the nth time, you felt like it was a dream

he looked much more attractive up close.

☾ ⋆ * ･ ゚: ⋆ * ･ ゚: ✧ * ⋆. *: ･ ﾟ ✧ .: ⋆ * ･ ゚: .⋆ ☾

what seemed like weeks passed by and you were still in the same dimension, not once waking up to reality. the topic of being in a dream that once worried you seemed to have been forgotten by you, as if you truly belonged in the dimension you found yourself into. slowly, your relationship with him developed further and you became a pair.

you once looked at him for being so good looking, a personality that you loved, born with talent and bonus point for being your favourite fictional character. now looking at the sleeping boyfriend in front of you with his head rested on his crossed arms, you brought out a hand as you reached out, gently grazing his cheek with the back of your index finger.

you loved everything about him.

“if i were from a different dimension, how would you react?” you asked in a whisper, careful not to stir him awake. you looked around your surroundings, the quiet library where your boyfriend would accompany you study once every week; the scenery through the tinted windows with the muffled sounds of pouring rain cutting the usual silence; and the man you wished had not been a fictional character sleeping with inaudible snores, including the visible bags under his eyes from practicing.

there were very few students today, as they quietly studied for the upcoming finals. months had passed since you found yourself in the dimension away from reality, you never once returned and you had nearly forgotten about it.

“i don't want to wake up from this — if only you weren't fictional, and if only we were meant to be together in the same world,” you whispered as a cracked sob escaped from your lips that couldn't help but quiver at the memories you had with him.

looking at how peaceful your boyfriend looked, you had to smile as a tear managed to escape. you softly called out to his name, the name you wished you could call forever, adding an “i love you” to finish the sentence.

at the end of the day, he couldn't get your words out of his head. he heard everything, and he wanted to talk to you about it.

he never wanted to lose you either.

☾ ⋆ * ･ ゚: ⋆ * ･ ゚: ✧ * ⋆. *: ･ ﾟ ✧ .: ⋆ * ･ ゚: .⋆ ☾

tomorrow marked one year since you arrived in the fictional dimension. you were currently in his room, relaxing on his bed as he did his homework. was it the right time to talk about it? you pondered. it was rare for you to be quiet in times like this, and he probably figured out what you were thinking.

“when did you arrive here?” he asked, snapping you out of your endless thoughts leaving you in confusion.

“what do you mean?” you replied, “didn't you invite me here this morning?”

he brought his eyes to gaze into yours. “i mean, this dimension — the one you said fictional.”

his words caught you by surprise, making you wonder when did he found out. “how did you—”

“i'm sorry,” he replied, “i overheard you mentioning it that day in the library..”

it was when you finally realized — tomorrow would mark one year since you found yourself in the haikyuu dimension. now thinking about it, anxiety slowly rised into your head.

what if tonight would mark the last night for you to spend your time here?

your shaky pupils met his worrying ones. “are you okay?” he asked worriedly, rising from his seat to approach your trembling figure. you couldn't help but watch as his arms wrapped themselves around you, pulling you closer to him in an embrace. the tears wanting to escape began pouring out, dripping from your cheeks as they fell between him and you.

‘i don't want to leave.’

‘please don't leave.’

you didn't know how long had it been since you stayed in the same position, holding each other close. with a shaky breath, you began explaining everything; how you found yourself in the dimension and the world you originally belonged — the reality you had to face.

“maybe this would be the last day for me to be here,” you whispered.

he stayed quiet the whole time, not knowing what to say after hearing your explanations. he tried to process your words one by one, wanting to believe such a miracle exist for him and you.

he held you tighter in his arms as he called out to your name, repeating them before finding his tears overflowing as they streamed down his cheeks.

“i promise you,” he began, “i promise you, that i'll find you in our next life. i may be a fictional character in your world, and you will disappear from my world one day, but that won't change a thing. i love you, i love you and i love you —”

he pulled away from you, allowing some space in between as he cupped your face. slowly and gently, he tilted your face up to face him. he could only stare into your glassy eyes, still glistening from the tears. “i promise that in our next life, i'll find you and you'll find me.”

you smiled. “i promise that in our next life, i'll find you and you'll find me.” you repeated his words as your pinkies intertwined into a pinky promise.

you spent your night in his arms, talking about the possible future you might have in your next life, and recalling the memories you shared with him in his world.

the next morning, you were gone in his arms — as if you never existed in first place.

☾ ⋆ * ･ ゚: ⋆ * ･ ゚: ✧ * ⋆. *: ･ ﾟ ✧ .: ⋆ * ･ ゚: .⋆ ☾

as you tried to chase after your pet, it stopped right in front of a stranger as it clung onto him lovingly. “i-i'm sorry! i hope it doesn't cause you any trouble,” you panted, stopping next to it as you bowed deeply in front of the stranger who didn't utter a word.

“s-sir?” you called out, confused at his silence. you stood straight as you met the gaze of the familiar looking stranger who stared at you with wide eyes.

as if everything crashed upon you, you stared at him in surprise, your heart aching at the lingering familiarity upon your first meeting.

‘i found you.’

you had never met him before, yet why were you crying?

you both began to walk together as you exchanged greetings and numbers, your pet leading the way towards where it wanna be. what was important, though, was that you both recalled a certain memory from a previous life.

“i promise that in our next life, i'll find you and you'll find me.”

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

[rinbowaman]

Reina this has been on my mind ever since I read the seven series what is your story or explanation of the Devil having heeeeungs appearance like as in appearing as a Korean man along with his brothers. I’ve always been curious about that and I am dying to hear what your thoughts are on it. I love seven so much and heelel and Levi have me on my knees. 🤒🥴

Actually, this is something I’ve thought about ever since I drafted the series. Your curiosity is warranted, back when I initially drafted the storyline, I knew I was going to have to provide an explanation, and I am happy to do it now, and take a break from all these lovely requests in my inbox lol.

Shape of You

Warnings: short Drabble, canon, historical references (some factual and some fiction), yandere love, some dark concepts, devil Heeseung is in love with you, some fluff, hints of smutty things.

“Can I ask you a question?”

You lean back, relaxing the blades of your shoulders against his broad chest. His partially gloved hand swoops from behind and plays with your hair over collar bone. His black blouse remains unbuttoned, allowing you to fall into the soft, white long sleeve and the loose tie around his neck. “Mmhmm.” He hums out tenderly as his hand taps against your belly; tips of his fingers walking up and down, trailing the northern and southern borders of your abdominal canvas. The both of you enjoying a moment of leisure, relaxing on his throne and gazing up at the stars. It was moments such as this, that made you realize the devil truly meant it when he says that you are everything, and that he loves you more than anything.

“Do you purposely portray yourself as an Asian male or is that truly how you were created?”

You were blunt, which he always preferred. He always reassured you that he would be truthful, and that you never had to feel discomfort when asking him anything your mind yearns to inherit. Tilting his face to the side, he admires the depth of your side profile and kisses the center of your ear, gently whispering.

“What makes you think I would portray myself as anything other than what is the truth?”

He partially jests as he chuckles against your ear canal. One of the gestures he was fond of doing, because he knew it tickled yet brought a pleasurable sense inside you. “It’s just—ah…” a subtle gasp escapes your lips as he slowly licks your neck, pushing the tip of his nose into your ear as he gently nibbles your jawline. “Mmhmm…you were saying, baby?” He antagonizes as he keeps his oral movements going, encouraging for you to finish your statement.

“Before you brought me here…you know, all those churches in the world talked about how the devil would shapeshift and deceive people…so I just…didn’t know if y-you…were really showing…y-your trrrrrue—ah!”

You help as he picks up the pace and sucks in your skin, harshly pinching it between teeth as he leaves discoloration and a subtle bite mark. Meanwhile his hand slips into the high slit of your silky gown, taking advantage of the fact that he never allowed you to eat panties, and began probing your slit. You desperately slap your hands on his forearms as you stabilize your posture. He chuckles in seeing you struggle as you lean away a tad, just so you could get him to answer the question without fondling you the entire time.

His chuckling transfers to a deep sigh of ceasefire, amused by your gasping for air as you propped yourself high and straight, yet your derrière looked even more appealing as it plumps against his throbbing bulge. But he figured he owed you an answer…for now.

“What else did the Bible tell you? Hmm? Did it tell you how bad the devil was? That I violated maidens and killed off Gods angels?” He releases a laconic scoff. “What a joke.”

“S-so…it’s all not true?” You inquired as you finally composed your breathing, and felt safe enough to lean back once more, which he relished and expressed contentment by embracing your waist, interlocking his fingers around your bellybutton. Unbeknownst to you, he really was doing his best to behave and display some self restraint as he continued to answer.

“Well beautiful, there’s a lot that goes into it. But let’s just say that a lot of the things that were drafted about me were over exaggerated, or drafted untruthfully, all for the mere sake of installing fear—fear to control.” He takes your hand in his palm and tenderly enclosed it. “But that’s a conversation for another time.” He whispered against your cheek.

“As for your question, this is how I was brought into life.”

“Any particular reason why you were made to specifically look and speak Korean?”

He smirks. “Well, truth be told, my former master loves diversity. Before he created mortals, he used his angels to form a baseline on what he wanted humans to replicate. There are many that come in all varieties. It just so happens my brothers and I all came out reflecting an oriental appearance. As for the language well, you already know we speak all dialects, even the lost ancient ones.”

Whispering in Arabic, he professes sweet words of love and tenderness in the language. “See? And now that you you’re my wife, you understand and speak all that of which exists.”

It’s true. The moment he brought you back to life as his Queen, you inherited a wide list of inhuman abilities, one of them was the suddenness of speaking and understanding all languages.

You spoke back in ancient Egyptian dialect, responding subtly. He smiles. “Good girl.”

“So, did he create all his other angels the same way?” He leans his head back, resting it against the grand head rest of the throne as he gazes and admires the outline of your profile. “Some. Some do them took after the fair skinned with hair and eyes to match, while others came out bolder and exotic in appearance. Michael, for instance, was created with a Mediterranean appearance, contrary to what mortals would imagine.”

“The arch angel Michael?” You asked in shock. He nods.

“My former master had an idea of how he wanted humans to become, but really couldn’t think of any other way to form their appearance. So he used his angels and guide.”

“But I thought the Bible described angels to appear differently…it described them as nonhuman entities, just a large eye with six wings that rotated.”

He smirks upon your oblivious nature. He has so much to teach you. “The original angels, such as myself, served as the original draft of what humans should take after. Those created after are nothing like us…you remember.” He raises a brow as he takes an expectant tone. You do remember those humanoid metallic figures, whom appeared more monstrous than anything else.

“Why don’t we take a walk and talk about all that’s in your mind. Whatever questions you have, we can spend the day feeding your curiosity…” he grips your waist and gently lifts you, only to slowly drag you back down and ride your slit against his lengthy bulge. “In a little while…hm baby?”

You fling your head back over his shoulder. “Uh…uh-huh.”

Moving you back and forth, he forced you to take on a riding momentum as he sets the pace; his hands never losing grip along your waistline. Your hands slam on the elegant rails of the arm chair. You didn’t care what they landed on, you just needed something to grip and dig your fingers into. “Fuuuuuuuck yeeeeeeah.” He whispers against your ear, dragging out his tone to be deep and creaky as he continued to move your hips in waving motion.

“Relax baby, I’ll tell you whatever you wanna hear…I’ll answer all of your questions…just let me fuck you first.

It’s too bad your mind went entirely blank. By the time he was finished with you, you were senselessly incoherent and just a moaning mess, fucked too dumb to think of anything other than the soreness of your opening struggling to close after the constant thrusting, and the juices flowing out, stringing your thighs. When all was said and done, nearly hours after the initial conversation, the only lesson you learned from all of this was that you should never show the devil how curious you can get….because he’ll get curious right back. And the devil doesn’t sleep, until his curiosity is no longer peaked.

- Fin

[coolnonsenseworld]

This is kind of an answer to this ask

I think fiction is here to make us emotional and dramatic. But also, to be honest, I am a very bitter person and feel sour about VLD too. But in my experience - not the show disappointed me but the fandom.

Though, I think I simply didn't have expectations for the show to be honest, maybe because I was older watching it? I saw it as a story made up by a group of adults, it's not a divine scripture, my thoughts on it were separate from the story evolving, and when I am re-watching it now I'm having sometimes even more fun, re-learning details and setting them apart. So I can't compare myself to this experience.

My grandmother has a massive collection of books. I asked her once "Have you read all of them?" Mostly, she answered. "Are they all good?" And she sighed, took a pause and told me "All books are good, because even the disappointing ones teach you what you don't like."

As a youngster, she also took a bus to a paper, because she wanted to look a man who wrote an article about how amazing Pan Tadeusz is in the eye, but you know. She read Pad Tadeusz and had to decide what she thinks about it and was willing to have a conversation.

That conversation about it, the fandom, for me, was disappointing and I am happy I met a lot of friends I could talk with in private, and had my own resolutions about it, and despite feeling like some fandoms are not for me - characters I love always will be. Always will receive care from me, I will always draw them compassionate and hugging and laughing together.

It might sound arrogant, but I divide canon from fanon - these characters can have as many lives as you will write them. Even the original autor always shuffles through a few options, backtracks, revives their sherlock, you know. Writers will make decisions that won't make readers happy. I am personally against forcing a change in canon if I am not asked about the opinion. They wrote their perspective, they wrote what they saw in the world. It's a statement like any other, not an attack on my narrative.

This show had a lot of amazing people working on it - talented artists behind it - stunning backgrounds, creative mecha, captivating animation, epic fights, giving us sooooo many fun moments and emotions. It brought forward ridiculous amounts of fans who loved these characters, took what's best in them. Losing respect to all of it, because I didn't like the ending seems counter-productive.

So yes - being kind to a fictional character will be for me like being kind to yourself. I don't care who else wrote them and how, as long as I make them happy in my hands.

In fact, a closing thought - I don't think I would be drawing as much Klance if they were canon. I think their conflict makes me even more invested trying to figure out how to make them fit together, trying to figure out what comfort I saw in them.

I can't grieve klance, when their safety remains in my hands.

[kaiser-author-san-iii]

In Pursuit of Happiness | Various Genshin Impact Men x Reader

Okay honestly, did not expect such a response for this story. Haha. I’m not really a great writer either and even if I do have an idea, I force myself to continue the story despite having no plot. I just post. But thanks so much for all the love so far guys. This fandom has been really welcoming to me and its fun befriending people with the same love for the story and characters. 

If you guys are curious, yes, I post this along side ao3 and maybe even thinking about posting it on wattpad too but who’s to say. 

Well, due to popular demand, I shall post the second chapter. 

Not beta read/proofed, we die like Signora

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Summary: The task of an aunt was no easy thing, especially towards a rambunctious and curious nephew who can not sit still. After a bad car accident, the two of them awaken in the world of Teyvat where Y/n must do her best to not only keep herself and her nephew alive to find a way back home but to also beat back all kinds of suitors and become the pseudo mother to every child she meets and her nephew befriends.

CHAPTER 2: The Wandering Lady of Teyvat

People were getting more anxious and happen to be more rambunctious in finding the said Divine Creator.

Y/n had no bother in that as she was more focused in creating new works. It was a sight to see people, especially the women, swoon over the fictional Mr. Darcy after recalling as much as she could from the book. If she wasn’t going to read the books ever again if she doesn’t go back home, then she could at least write her favorite books for not only herself to enjoy but for others as well.

It was interesting to see children in Mondstadt to aim to become Spider-Man too, even singing the theme song.

Books were fun, but Y/n enjoyed taking walks just as much as she loved painting as she would always travel on foot with [Nephew’s name] following closely behind and when they got to a certain point, a few of their forest friends and creatures would pop out and follow them as well. Sometimes, Y/n would have a basket filled with food and her sketchbook since she would sketch the landscape. It was fun to draw the fantastical and beautiful vegetation all around her. It was especially fun to draw the creatures as well as it made her feel like she was a concept artist for a game or a show.

It made her feel like her favorite concept artists from her old world.

What she didn’t know was the powers as her being the Divine Creator were being unconsciously used as whatever she sketched and thought about would be created and brought to life somewhere in Teyvat. The creatures that she drew were at first confused at the world around them until they found more of their kind who then proceeded to inform the newly born creature of who created them – Y/n, the Divine Creator.

Y/n found it quite strange that the animals of Teyvat were always approaching her and her nephew. Heck, even the slimes and the hilichurls would approach them, attempting to do whatever they wanted like travel to Liyue and back or even go to Dragonspine. That was where the Pyro slimes came to use as they would hop around the two with Y/n taking notes and [Nephew’s name] waving at the Cryo slimes that were there, wiggling and emitting a warm aura around them. But there was just something about [Nephew’s name] and his connection with animals that seemed so natural. Even back home, he would always rave on and on about having a farm, a petting zoo, etc. It didn’t help that his dad grew up around a farm and helped raise animals.

He loved the animals and slimes so much that he brought back some of them to the Hilichurl camp they stayed at and nursed them back to health like the small songbird, a rabbit, and an enormous Hydro Slime he affectionately called Billy.

It was a strange day when Billy came to their every day lives as it seemed to have protected some other slimes that were guarding the path that lead to the Hilichurl camp from people. That was also something that Y/n picked up as people were afraid, even hostile towards the creatures that helped them so much. It didn’t seem fair as they were always a joy to be around. The Hilichurls were a hoot, dancing almost every night or when they are happy, the Mitachurls were these big protectors and [Nephew’s Name] had fun climbing up their backs or shields and they would always become a nervous mess when he was about to fall and always made sure to be mindful of their strength. The Samachurls were the wise ones, with one with an ability to heal, they were always there to help the others make a full recovery. They also helped Y/n with finding herbs and teach her about healing as well when the time came.

Her moment to shine came as she saw the big Hydro slime in front of her, giving her the hopeful and tired smile or at least what a slimes equivalent to a smile was. It kept looking at the young woman as she made quick work with the help of a Hydro Samachurl that was nearby as a Hilichurl held [Nephew’s Name] back as he was curious about the big slime.

It made a full recovery and [Nephew’s Name] grew attached to it to the point he named it Billy. With the slimes that he protected leading you to where the Hilichurls found them, Billy was protecting the slimes from the Knights of Favonius that were coming to investigate why the path they were in right now was fortified like a wall and the hilichurls were very aggressive to people these days. As a thank you for letting them stay with them, Y/n made sure to travel far away so as to not think that she was in kahoots with Hilichurls even though she was. She just didn’t want anything to happen to her new friends, especially since they were always helping take care of her nephew and he enjoyed their company.

As she was out, embarking in many paths and meeting new acquaintances, it was a sight to see that people made shrines of this Divine Creator. But the funny thing was that it had an uncanny resemblance to her own face, even gems the same color of her eyes right where the eyes should be.

… These people were serious.

She had to buy many cosmetics and remember all the make up tutorials she watched and studied under her sister to walk through cities as who knows what these people would do if they found someone that had similar features to her. It could go one way or the other – say that she’s blessed and highly favored by the Creator to have been bestowed a similar face or highly persecuted for committed blasphemy and hunted down like an animal for having a similar face.

If the people found out that the look alike can shapeshift, they’re going to tell the church.

Either way, she didn’t want to be involved much with the politics of this world, especially since she heard tell of the Fatui. What she’s been hearing were interesting and it would be best to avoid areas that they frequented, especially if she was with her nephew.

She will be damned if he ever got mixed with the wrong crowd of people in a fantasy world.

That and if she was reckless, her sister would murder her.

It sent shivers down her spine at the horrors she would endure if one hair out of line if they returned home. Such horrors gave her more chills than the icy winds of Dragonspine and Snezhnaya.

The good thing about being in a new world where neither of them had to worry about modern technology, school, or work is that they now had all the time in the world and with the ever-growing list of hobbies that Y/n partakes, she does lots of mineral and material collecting when she has the chance and even a few objectives to earn more mora in between the seven nations.

Money is money after all.

Spare no expense when it comes to her adorable nephew who she believes needs to be spoiled occasionally.

-x-

Today they were in Liyue, the two walking towards Liyue harbor, deciding to visit Bubu Pharmacy for a check up for [Nephew’s name]. She had full trust of the Samachurls, but she wanted a second opinion on her Nugget’s health.

Holding his hand gently, they climbed up the many steps to the grand building, but not before enjoying the scenery of the city and way to the pharmacy where they came to face to face with the receptionist, who happened to be a little girl with cute eyes and beautiful violet purple hair. She had to hold back her squeal as she found her so adorable before coughing lightly and flashed a smile.

“Welcome to Bubu Pharmacy. I am Qiqi.” Said the girl as she looked at the young woman, suddenly feeling warmth radiating from the lady that was looking at her. It mainly came from her, but she could feel slight hints from the boy that also stared at her with fascination.

“Hello Qiqi. I’m Y/n, and this is [Nephew’s name]. We’re here for an appointment for this one.”

“Appointment…” The girl suddenly made a focused face or at least how focused a zombie could look as she opened a book in front of her to then look up at the young woman again.

“Yes, appointment for [Nephew’s Name]. Dr. Baizhu will be here soon.”

She was already acting so grown up! Ah, her heart couldn’t take it as she almost fell over backwards if it wasn’t for her nephew holding onto her hand. She thought her nephew could be this cute, but this girl hardly even tried. Girls were always such a wonder as Y/n and her older sister always talked about either of them having a daughter and how they would spoil her rotten with lots of clothes though they already do the same thing to [Nephew’s name] already. But shopping for girl’s clothes was so darn rewarding,

Well, that is if they wanted to have a feminine clothing style. It didn’t matter to Y/n as they would be cute, nonetheless.

Dear lord, she’s started to sound like Elizabeth from Black Butler.

“Hi Qiqi! I’m [Nephew’s name]! I hope we can be best friends! I don’t go into the cities a lot.” The boy said sheepishly as he tried to get a closer look at the girl, who wore talismans on her body. She really was a zombie.

How cool was that?

Qiqi wore a dreary look on her face as she looked on at the boy, who was smiling at her. She hardly had time to leave the Pharmacy as she helped Baizhu quite a lot as the receptionist. Lately, it’s been getting a little hard because of the growing cold weather. After hearing all this, Y/n immediately went into mother mode and precured a blanket and scarf for the girl from her ‘Mystical’ bag of wonder that carried more that it should have.

Or at least that’s what Nugget calls it. He once saw his aunt pull out one of the axes for the Mitachurls.

Carefully wrapping the scarf around the girls’ neck and the blanket around the young girl, she stepped back to look her proud work, smiling at just how adorable she looked.

“There. If you need any more blankets, just say the word. Though you’ll probably have to look for me around the marsh.” She said a bit bashfully with [Nephew’s name] nodding more, probably thinking of having play dates with the zombie girl. Yes, his first friend that wasn’t a slime or a hilichurl was coming to fruition. Now if only his aunt could get the attention of a worthy man and it would all fall into place!

“I apologize for the wait you’ve endured.” There was a rich voice coming from behind the [H/c]-ette’s to see a tall and handsome emerald haired man. Yes, his hair was one of the first things to notice but the eyes were second as they appeared almost amber like – gold even.

Though the only thing that [Nephew’s name] bothered to notice was the-

“Snake! And it’s so pretty!” he cried out happily as he jumped forward and looked up at the albino snake wrapped around the man’s neck like a scarf. Back in their old world, there was the Caduceus, a staff with two snakes coiled around it – it was the official insignia of the public health service or anyone that worked within the medical field.

The snake seemed to bask in the attention as it lifted its head pridefully, looking at the young boy with interest.

“You are too kind, young one.” The snake said, earning a more awe look from the boy.

“And she talks too! An Albino snake that talks!”

Y/n had to cover her mouth at her nephew’s adorable fascination with animals again all while the albino snake seemed to already hold the boy in some high favor. Though, she didn’t escape the stare of Bubu Pharmacy’s doctor as she finally took notice of him and bowed lightly.

“Ah! Y-yes. Forgive me. And do not worry of our wait. Qiqi here was quite a delight with us.” She turned over to look at the young girl, smiling again as the doctor followed her gaze to see the same Qiqi be covered in a blanket and scarf all while it looked like flowers were floating around her as she gently snuggled more into the warmth that her new gifts provided.

“I see.” Baizhu was entertained to say the least as he looked at the woman before him, feeling as if she was quite familiar but couldn’t say otherwise other than feeling the warmth that radiated from her along with the young boy that she was with. She was a beauty, yes. And looked to be quite young, her [h/c] strands framing her face as she seemed to have quite a distant look. The clothes that she wore were a tad strange, making him believe that the woman in front of him was a traveler of sorts.

The two followed Baizhu to the back, [Nephew’s name] still talking to the snake, the two finding out her name was Changsheng.

Getting dressed into a gown, the boy soon answered all questions asked by the doctor and if he was stumped, Y/n would fill in.

The scars that were from a year earlier from the accident were still present and Baizhu asked about them.

“Treasure hoarders. He and I barely made it out only thanks to our family.”

The tone in the atmosphere darkened lightly but to Y/n and her Nugget, it was all just a fabricated story. Yes, you lost your family, but whoever was curious weren’t going to ask more about dead family members if that’s the story.

Changsheng having gotten close to the boy felt lots of sympathy as the boy had to see lots of horrors so suddenly. She felt sympathy for the mother as well, having to be the only one to raise the boy.

“I see. I’m sorry for your loss. I’m sure your son is blessed to have a mother like you.”

To witness the blushing face of the woman in front of her was blissful gift as Y/n quickly shook her head almost comically, her nephew laughing as the warmth from earlier had come back but this time it was much stronger.

So strong in fact that a certain amber-eyed archon noticed and almost dropped his cup of tea as he hurriedly stood to his feet and rushed out to follow where the warmth came from.

Back to Y/n, she finally attempted to speak.

“No. No! He’s not my son! He is my nephew. Well, I suppose I can see where people confuse us as mother and son…” she said, the blush on her cheeks still present as the emerald haired doctor chuckled in amusement.

“My apologies. I was in the wrong to assume. You two seem quite close.”

“Yeah! Auntie is very nice to me! She’s there for me even I know mommy isn’t here anymore.”

“Hey now. Stop that gloomy talk or else Dr. Baizhu won’t reward you with a piece a candy.” Y/n playfully pinched her Nugget’s cheeks, making him whine playfully but it did earn a laugh as Baizhu pulled up a small lollipop from his pocket. [Nephew’s name] then proceeded to behave, doing whatever Dr. Baizhu told him to just as they finished up, Y/n heard a voice.

‘Oh, great Divine Creator. Wherever you are, I hope that you are safe. Please, if you can hear me, please return to us. And keep my son safe wherever he is.’

Y/n stopped, clutching her head as her suspicion of who she is to these people were proving her right so far. And of all times to be proved right… what headache. Literally.

This is giving her Kamisama Hajimemashite vibes.

“Is something wrong? Do you feel pain?” Baizhu’s voice was next to her and turning towards him, her [e/c] eyes seeing the worried look, followed by her nephew and Changsheng.

“It’s just a passing headache, Doctor. Perhaps I’ve neglected to eat and drink this morning in worry of my nephew’s health. He’s been such a healthy boy and hardly gets sick but nonetheless, I worry.”

“He’s a healthy boy. In fact, almost too healthy. It’s good for children to take a tumble or two, you know.” Baizhu watched the [H/c]-ed boy talk to Changsheng more, wanting to know more about the snake as they blissfully ignored the two adults.

“I’m aware. Again, thank you Dr. Baizhu.”

“It’s my pleasure. Be sure to schedule another appointment if you want to be up to date with his health with Qiqi.”

The doctor walked them back out to the reception with Qiqi waiting patiently, writing down the names for next months appointment. Afterwards, she took off the scarf and blanket only for Y/n to shake her head and smile as she handed them back to the girl.

“Keep them. We have plenty more. I have too much time on my hands that I forget how many I make.” If Qiqi could get any happier, she would if it wasn’t for the fact she hardly makes any expressions. There were far more flowers radiating from her as she snuggled closer to the blankets than before. Baizhu and Changsheng showed them off as they waved them goodbye.

After walking a certain distance, walking to a secluded spot of Liyue harbor, Y/n and Nugget held onto each other. There was a small playful glint in her eyes as she eyed the clear skies, unaware of one man walking closer to them as he followed them when they left Bubu Pharmacy. He could feel the warmth coming from both, yet the one he was mainly focused on was the woman beside the child, who gently talked to them, saying a few jokes before walking towards a secluded part of the harbor – away from prying eyes.

“Alright Nugget. Hold on tight, okay?”

“Got it!”

They walked further into the alley way and before the Archons very eyes, the two shot up into the air suddenly but instead of falling towards the ground, they kept afloat without the need of a glider. The woman and child looked as if they were walking through the skies of Liyue and only him did he notice the strange phenomenon.

They walked all the way to the direction of Dihua Marsh, where he made sure to follow them.

I’m a big howls moving castle fan okay and cause I'm still waiting on Baizhu so I can pull him! Ah, Qiqi is so cute and I will literally adopt her if I ever see her. Also I’m trying to make these chapters long not only as a challenge to myself but also to just make it feel like a light novel hahaha. Oh, maybe I can make cover arts and just scenes of the story when I have the time. I’m kinda excited. Also, Billy the Hydro Slime is our mascot/friend. We must protect Billy. Anyways, thanks for reading! Be sure to like, reblog, ask me to add you on the taglist for updates, maybe even share some ideas since I’m still figuring out the plot. 

TAGLIST: 

@axolotlboo  @crazypriestess

[sisterofficerlucychen]

sometimes i get so emotional over the rookie that i sob a little bit because of how much this little show of ours means to me like i know it can be a little silly but it's been my comfort for the past two years. which is also so interesting because it's a procedural dramedy and it shouldn't be that deep but it is? the stories and characters created in this universe are that deep.

i've always fallen down the rabbit hold of so many different shows but i don't think any have even come to the level of what this show means to me. i think it's the first time where i really see myself in more than one character and in more than one way: it's the representation of seeing someone who looks like me, has similar traits (good and bad) as i do, and shares a similar background that i can relate to and empathize with.

they're characters whose stories i'm so invested in and ones i'm rooting for. they make me laugh, cry, frustrate me, but at the end of the day i'm so happy and thankful for them and to be able to experience their journey. i look up to them — in times where i feel stuck or confused, i think about what they would do. i admire them and their strengths that despite being fictional they still push me to do and try better because that's the influence they have.

when i think of their journey, it's so cool to see where they started to where they're at, also where they're headed. it's amazing to be able to see such character development and growth but also how raw and real they are because they're human and they're going to make mistakes. the beauty is seeing them get up and try again as they continue to grow and heal.

i also think of what they've brought me outside of the world inside the show. they've brought me here to this incredible fandom where i've been so lucky to meet such amazing people and share the love and excitement for the show and its characters. i love spiraling with everyone on tuesday's (and then the rest of the week until we get a new episode) lol. being able to freakout about different storylines, speculate about what may happen based off different hints and sneak peeks, and celebrate everyone's amazing talents and what they share with the rest of us

♡ i'm so grateful for this show, the cast/crew, everyone i've met so far because of it, and hopefully those i've yet to connect with over it ♡

[overshelter]

REVIEW: Case File Compendium/BingAnBen/BAB

WARNING: Contains SPOILERS, so beware!

BAB was a trip.

It has a very good pace of world development until about halfway through. After that it gets a bit, hm, stagnant. But it's not totally disappointing, it just doesn't give you that extreme anxiety to know more about the investigation and the whole criminal organization of the Mandela Plan. Besides, I thought the whole science fiction thing was a bit of a misnomer. I think Meatbun faltered a little there and could have been more careful. Perhaps it lacked a certain stimulus, I don't know.

Well, apart from what I've said, what I liked most was undoubtedly the emotional and mental work. Especially Xie Qingcheng.

His whole vision of himself as a person, of the world and how he had a vision, a future in which he saw himself as disposable, only to end up as someone who thinks: "I'm wanted, I'm remembered, I'm loved" really enchanted me.

The analogy of him being a patched-up teddy bear that nobody would want got to me so much! Especially in the narration of his past, how he felt like an imposter when he came back and got that reaction from Xie Xue.

For this reason, until now, after reading the entire novel, chapter 132 remains my favorite and the one that got me the most. That "thank you for coming back alive" from He Yu was something Qingcheng always wanted, but could never have. Knowing that he was right to fight, right to persist in living and how happy he made someone in his life by not giving up and undergoing treatment with RN-13, was... beautiful. Really.

He Yu made him think that his life still had value, that despite being a patched-up teddy bear, someone still wanted and cherished that teddy bear, even with all the cuts, patches and replaced parts. That teddy bear still brought comfort and could still be loved.

AND THAT'S EVERYTHING TO ME! BAB CHAPTER 132, I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!

Okay, okay. Moving on.

I also really liked the work with He Yu, even if I thought that the author faltered in some areas, but in general he's my baby dragon who makes me tap my feet with how adorable he can be, especially in the extras! And, sir! I love, LOVE how disgusting He Yu can be! He's totally a young master, never stopped being one!

Concubine He and Dr. Xie really do have complementary personalities, and I firmly believe that, even if they tried, they wouldn't feel complete with other people. They were meant to be together! And, like, in every way!

What He Yu lacks, Xie Qingcheng fills and vice versa. I strongly believe that these two argue a lot and have fights over ridiculous things. And that delights me, as I'm sure they'll be in a loving mood by the end.

IN SUMMARY!

Case File Compendium/BingAnBen/BAB is a good choice of reading for those who like the "mental, investigation and fiction" theme. I recommend it if you've checked the triggers/tags and like a "love/hate/HORNY" couple KEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKE

[irlkdj]

Comparing Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint and I Want To Eat Your Pancreas [SPOILERS]

I will be mostly discussing themes of choice and love, so if you have not already I implore you to read my post about orv and themes of choice here.

I Want To Eat Your Pancreas is about a girl named Sakura who is terminally ill. A boy named Haruki stumbled upon her diary during a hospital visit. It was titled “Living with Dying.” He is the only one aside from her family that knows of her illness. Because of this, a special bond forms between them. She begins to pester him by getting a job in the library he works at. She tells him a story about how if someone were to eat a healthy version of the infected part of their body, they’d be cured of their ailments.

She begins to show up everywhere and tells him that she wants to spend the rest of her life hanging out with him. Haruki does not have friends. Much like Kim Dokja, he spends his days with his nose in a book—he thinks people do not want to know him.

Despite his expressing annoyance at her insistence, he still finds himself accompanying her. Fulfilling this list of things she wanted to do before she died. When hanging out, they have the following conversation:

He says no one is interested in him and so he isn’t interested in others. He is happy to let all relationships start and die in his head. She says immediately that she is interested in him—something that leaves him speechless. She actually lectures him on his poor habit of deciding everyone dislikes him. He doesn’t /let/ people love him. This is much like Kim Dokja’s mindset in the sense that he refuses to let people know him. He can’t comprehend the idea that anyone would /want/ to know him.

Sakura’s friends tell her they could find her someone better. Someone more interesting and not as boring. But she continues to hang out with him. They keep asking her why and she just says “we just get along.” There doesn’t need to be a reason to like someone. You don’t need to be extraordinary to be worthy of someone’s care and attention. Like Kim Dokja, whose life was another tragedy. Kim Dokja who was just a salaryman; a lousy employee who liked to read. A boy who avoided the complexities of relationships with fiction. Both Kim Dokja and Haruki think relationships bring problems. They are physically incapable of imagining a world where someone could care for someone are average as them. Being alone is easier. It’s easier to assume no one will like you because then you don’t face rejection.

Sakura tells him to stop spending so much time reading books and instead focus on spending time with /people/. Something he doesn’t do until the end of the film. In fact, one boy continuously reached out to Haruki by offering gum and he always refused.

With this continuous refusal, he does continue to accompany Sakura. After the two spend a spontaneous vacation together, Haruki even has a moment of honesty. A moment where he admits that he had fun.

This reminds me of Dokja coming to terms with the fact that even though he doesn’t believe in fantasies, he wants to enjoy his time with his companions. He never lets himself /want/ anything, but the safety and companionship these people provide him give him hope. As seen below, Kim Dokja says it’s easier to survive alone. Comfortable even. But he ends it with a “but..” I want to be with you. I want to love you despite all the problems that come with being by your side. Because with love comes pain, but I’ll carry that pain.

Later in the film, Haruki and Sakura argue and he proclaims that he should’ve never tried to interact with others. All he brings to others is pain. It’s similar to Kim Dokja coping with the fact that the novel that brought him these companions also ruined them.

She tells him that’s not true and he insists she should be with someone else who can care for her more. They just met by chance. Their relationship wasn’t special. She says it wasn’t a coincidence—that everyone is what they are because of the choices they’ve made.

“You're wrong. It wasn't chance. Everyone is where they are because of the choices they've made. Our choices led us to being in the same class. Our choices brought us to the hospital. Not chance. There's no such thing as fate. All the choices you've made and all the choices I've made brought us together. You and I met by our own decisions.”

Much like I say in my orv and the power of choice analysis, choosing to love someone is the most powerful act of free will we can choose as human beings. To /choose/ to love someone. How every day, every moment, every second is made up of countless choices we've made. How coincidences don't truly exist, because we end up where we are at each moment because of a choice someone made. Life is full of choices. Some are worse than others. It matters what we do with the next choice. It matters what we do with the choices we make. It matters how we factor in others' thoughts and feelings into the choices we make. Life is nothing without human connection. Making the choice to continue living.. the choice to have those relationships even though they're scary and uncertain. That’s what living is all about.

“Living...... Means having bonds with others. Paying attention to someone. Loving someone. Hating someone. Having fun being with someone. Taking someone’s hand. That’s what it means to live. If you’re all alone, you cant tell that you exist. Your relationship with others, is what defines being alive. I know my mind exists, since I can interact with others. I know my body exists, because others touch me. That’s where the purpose of being alive comes from. Just like we’ve been chosen to live out this moment here and now.”

Sakura asks Haruki: you want me to live? And he says yes, very much. Just like how orv teaches its readers that someone out there wants you to exist. Someone out there desperately wants to write you a story. Someone out there wants you to know that they love you.

Letting yourself want something. Wanting someone else to live. It reminds me of Kim Dokja proclaiming his wish of living in a big house with everyone. It’s not selfish to want to be loved. It’s not selfish to crave human interaction. Someone out there /wants/ to give that to you.

After this, Haruki begins to let people in. He finally accepts the gum. He expresses his care that normally goes unspoken to Sakura. He begins to truly live. When the destruction of the world began in orv, it was the start of Kim Dokja’s life. He began to let people love him.

Haruki chose to pick up that diary. Kim Dokja chose to read that story. Haruki chose to accompany Sakura. Kim Dokja chose to stick by his companions. They chose to walk alongside these people which cause them unbearable pain, but show them how beautiful life can be.

When he’s waiting for her at the cafe, he says he’s thinking about her. He says she is so much more amazing than him, and he wants to become like her. able to love and acknowledge others. Able to /be/ loved. He sends her one final message: “I want to eat your pancreas.”

He waits and waits and she never arrives. He leaves the cafe and comes home to the news that she’s been murdered. 

A man who at the beginning said he didn’t care for others, suddenly unable to walk up the stairs. Overtaken with grief. Clutching his phone with that final message as he cried. The book he promised to read and return still sitting on his shelf.

Sakura’s mother gave him her diary after the funeral, and in it contained a farewell letter addressed to him.

Haruki thought as he read the letter that he wanted to know her epilogue. She said there were many times she thought she had fallen in love with him. But that their relationship couldn’t be summed up by simple terms like love or friendship.

In her letter, she says she thinks he’s a really amazing person. In turn he says it’s not true, he’s a coward. Just like how Kim Dokja had viewed himself as average, unlovable, and impossible to be cared for. But Sakura loved Haruki. Han Sooyoung loved Kim Dokja. Despite there being almost nothing special about these two, someone saw a light within them that even themselves couldn’t locate.

Sakura always thought of herself as an average girl with a shorter lifespan. “But you cared for an uninteresting girl like me. You, who have no need for relationships like friendship or love, chose none other than me. Perhaps I’ve spent 17 years waiting to be needed by you.”

She reiterates that their relationship can’t be summed up with stuffy words, so she decides on one final message: I want to eat your pancreas. He opens her phone and finds tearfully that his final message, the same she wished to send to him, reached her. 

After reading her diary and seeing the message was received. He turns to her mother and asks: “Can I cry now?” Letting himself sit in the grief he refused to feel. Grief is all the unspoken love we have for those who have left us. He proclaims: I lived my life just to meet you. Thank you.

Her mother invited him and Kyoko (Sakurra's best friend) to come have dinner at the house sometime. After that he makes attempts to connect with Kyoko, despite her outward dislike for him. Sakura had always wished for them to get along. He tells her the truth of their relationship, and let’s her see Sakura’s diary. He chases after her when she flees the cafe where they met and asks that for her to forgive him one day. He asks that one day they can be friends like Sakura had wished.

I Want To Eat Your Pancreas and orv both tell stories of unremarkable people. Ordinary individuals who hide away from the complexities of human relationships to protect themselves. But these stories show their readers that you don’t have to be anything other than yourself to be worthy of love. You don’t need to be class president to be friends with someone, you don’t need to be the protagonist to do something amazing. You don’t need to do anything other than be yourself for someone out there to see you for who you are and choose to love you. Someone out there wants to read your epilogue. Someone out there wants you to exist just as you are. 

[tiredsmashbros]

something a bit more personal so heads up

some tomm/tsb (me) lore: i've been a big fan of dragon ball since 2019, was actually a dragonball fanartist for two years straight (was my previous heavy fixation until i caved into mario). i'm also a big fan of matpat / gametheory since ofc 2014 due to fnaf and got back to frequently watching him around 2021.

both HUGE impacts that idk where i would be without them ever interfering my already heck of an enigma life. worse part is the fact i have to say goodbye to them both JUST a day apart. yes mat isn't deceased but the thought of not seeing him as much anymore after JUST getting to watch him again is straight-up heartbreaking. i would still watch and am already fond of the existing crew and 100% approve his retirement reasons. yet it all has been tearing me apart personally. it hurts. a lot. its sad. very sad. but in the end: i'm happy. i'm happy for the memories, experiences, and growth i received with them that i was able to receive in my life. both young and now as an adult.

watching. playing, drawing, and talking about how goku and his friends will get through the next challenge. it's made me love friendship adventure stories so much more, anxiously waiting for the next episode of super every saturday night on toonami. impacting me to become more optimistic and not to be afraid to draw what i really love (fanart). matpat encouraged me to think inside AND outside the box, to question reality and fiction, open to criticism and theorizing in a more bigger picture. wether serious, comedically, or satire, it wasn't just learning about the world or inner depictions of video games, food, or how to style ourselves; but for fun and loving those around you. appreciating the moment and learning at the same time. someone i could genuinely relate to and open my heart back up to older franchises such as mario, learning the film industry as i always wanted to, learn to appreciate food and get out of my comfort zone, and ofc be more knowledgeable of what i wear and how it can impact me. i could seriously just keeping going on and on.

idk how to end this other than by saying thank you. thank you toriyama. thank you matpat. never was it in my bingo card of 2024, but nothing is going to stop me from continuing to love and appreciate the things these two amazing individuals brought into the world, impacting so many lives. 💚❤️💛💙 + 🐉💥

[authoraemoseley]

An Introduction

About A. Hello there! I'm Anna (now you know what the A. stands for). I'm a 30 something author that's previously self published two short stories and a novella. You can read more about them (and read them!) here. I'm currently finishing up the first book in my (darkish) YA fantasy series House of Moons.

I went back to school to get my degree in Creative Writing and I'm finishing that up. While it's not the right choice for everyone, going to school for Creative Writing is the best and kindest thing I've done for myself.

When I'm not writing or studying, I'm playing Hollow Knight, plotting how to build the best blanket/pillow fort (you are never too old to make a blanket/pillow fort), baking cookies or trying to master the art of bread. If I'm not doing those things, then I'm probably playing with some sort of animal, reading, or exploring the woods.

I'm very blessed to work in a bookstore. I absolutely love it. Not only do I get to help people get into reading again and introduce them to new authors, I get to work with amazing people who love books just as much as I do.

I'm hard of hearing (HoH) with my hearing aids and deaf without them. I'm learning ASL so that I can y'know, communicate. Also because it's fun and it makes me feel more connected to my culture. I love helping people learn about deaf/hohness so please don't be afraid to ask me any questions!

"Ok, that's cool, but what do you write?"

Stuff. So. Much. Stuff. I'm a morbid soul, but I'm also a hopeful one. So I write darkly appealing stuff. I typically stick to fantasy, but toss in dark/horror elements.

My first short story "Roses for Cassandra" is about a stagehand that falls in love with a dancer. Victorian era vibes with a tinge of magic. There's a little darkness wedged in there too. I wrote it because I thought it was what people wanted to read, what I was supposed to write. While I don't think I would write it today, I'm glad I wrote it. It's brought happiness to a lot of people, and that's beautiful to me.

My Secrets of the Lion series (ongoing, currently on hold) is a historical fiction series (currently a short story and a novella), where I really chose to embrace the darkness. I also embraced my love of epistolary writing. Victorian era with secrets, lions and shenanigans! I love my little Victorian era dorks. The novella, Of Secrets and Sound is the first time I wrote my disability into a story.

But my true love, the thing I am deeply passionate about is House of Moons. It's a YA fantasy series with dark elements in it, and the main character has the same sort of hearing loss I have. It's the book that I always wanted to read as a kid, and now as an adult, but I've never found a book with enough space for me. So I'm writing it. My biggest hope is that those who feel like outcasts will be able to find a bit of shelter in it.

"Cool! But what is House of Moons about?"

Here, have a synopsis: Mark Featherguard should have it all. He's heir to the most powerful family of fire mages in the world, and about to start high school at one of the most famous magical schools known: House of Moons. To ice the proverbial cake, he and his best friend are going to be roommates.

But Mark's plagued with nightmares of a world ending black phoenix. His family lost the magical artifact they were supposed to guard. Sure it happened generations ago, but the magical community won't let them live it down. His parents, highly involved in magical politics have no time for him. In a sudden twist of fate his best friend just so happens to be moving.

And then there's the problem of someone, or something, destroying magical schools around the world. Mark just wants to be able to change his hearing aid batteries and pass his classes in peace.

But it seems like the magical world, and his new found friends, might need him to do a little more than that...

TL;DR:

Anna

She/They

30 something because it's a good age to be!

Went back to school to get her degree in Creative Writing...almost there!

Writes a wide variety of fantasy stuff, often times tossing in horror elements

I like writing dark, but hopeful stuff (thus "an appealing darkness")

My main WIP is House of Moons: The Phoenix Mirror which is the first in an upper YA fantasy series.

One of my back burner projects is a horror short story/screen play combo

Another back burner project is a horror short story collection

So that's me! Welcome! As I like to say, my teeth are sharp, but I rarely bite. While I'm quite shy, I do love being tagged and asked things, so if you think something might tickle my fancy, or have a question of any sort, tag and ask away!

[pulpandgristle]

SCP-6013: The Leviathan of the Aegean

Art by Valdevia

We are alone in the empty. Stars stare down, past the air, past the water, into me, my eyes, my skin. We know our place. It is here, always was. One of six who drink from bleeding fire, tumors in meat like a string of oily pearls. But there is only one. One to gestate us. This world is our Adytum. I will not let them kill it again.

Genre: Body horror, sci-fi, interactive fiction, xenofiction, wet, underwater yearning

Length: Approx. 17,000 words

Time to Read: An afternoon, probably

One-Sentence Summary: When the Foundation's contempt and biomantic rituals collide, a transgender linguist has to make a choice: do her duty to the world, or embrace the new, greater self that only a Sarkic superweapon can create.

SCP-6013 was my entry into the SCP-6000 contest way back in the summer of 2021. I'd been debating whether to write something for the site for quite awhile before that point. When I finally decided to give it a try, all of the advice I got said that it was best to start simple. So, naturally, I ignored it completely and wrote a conlang video game over the course of about three months. I had no experience on the site, no experience with CSS or Wikidot and no one brave enough to stop me. Now the SCP Foundation is stuck with me forever.

I wouldn't have been able to make anything that I've done for the SCP Foundation without the talent of fellow author and goop enthusiast @the-metaphysician. All of his work is scored with this meditative and dark undercurrent that I aspire to replicate with every word. Sarkicism has always been my favorite part of SCP's massive universe, and he's almost singularly responsible for its most iconic articles. Being able to add to Metaphysician's repertoire with SCP-6013 brought me so much happiness in an otherwise dreary time of my life. I look forward to making his creation even more wretched and captivating in the future.

The beautiful artwork at the top of this post, which depicts SCP-6013 in all her vast, undulating glory, is a commission from @valdevia. He's an incredibly talented artist and a super chill guy, and I have several more articles in production that make use of his work. SCP-6013 also contains a gorgeous sketch piece from the artist @demo0on on Twitter (that one's a spoiler unfortunately).

SCP-6013 is part sci-fi horror, part gay awakening, part puzzle game, all disgusting. It is a demanding undertaking, a pit of viscera explored in exhaustive detail and hideous depth. If you need something big to sink your teeth into, I'd love to hear what you think of it.

I hope that it changes you.

[bonesandthebees]

hey. it’s been a while :) not sure if you remember me but i just wanted to pop by and say that i will forever cherish your writing. your fics gave me a lot of comfort through a very dark time of mine, and reading about the silly fictional brothers made me feel a lot more excited and joyful in a world where i felt very lonely.

whenever i would read your stories, i couldn’t contain my very very dramatically fun reactions that i would say out loud to myself in my room (jumping up and down, screaming, crying, gasping, monologuing to myself, etc). i read so many different AUs and oneshots of yours and i couldn’t get enough! your work is so wonderful and i am AMAZED and how you can create such high-quality writing in a surprisingly short timeframe.

i loved clinic so much that i entered a 30 hour state of hyperfocus where i COULD. NOT. put it down. ruined my sleep schedule but it was so worth it!! and then i read it all again 2 days later. and then i read it AGAIN out loud to my friend over discord so he could enjoy it too :) i recommended world forgetting to a friend and it destroyed her (/pos). i kept recommending all of my friends your fics because they were all so wonderfully entertaining and had a level of quality that was hard to find elsewhere.

i loved clinic, world forgetting, stars, 17 hours, the vampire au, the mermaid au, and starman (?) (the horror one with the giant eye) and i’m sure there’s plenty more that are slipping my mind.

i’m currently in a place where i cannot decide if i’m even able to separate a content creator from his character. even the characters have been soured for me and it’ll be very tough to separate them. i hope i can, because they brought me so much joy in the past, and so did your writing :)

over the past year and a half or so i’ve been so lucky to be blessed with an absolutely wonderful girlfriend that i love very much, and i feel a lot less lonely and a lot more lighter. i’m more active in the real world and i’m doing more things that i love. because of this i’ve distanced from dsmp and unfortunately haven’t had enough time to fully understand qsmp (which is a shame because i love quackity and have been watching him quite literally since 2013 and he is very dear to me). but!! i still rant and rave about your stories to my girlfriend and i even got her to read clinic :)

ANYWAY… very long ramble hahah but all of this is to say that your work was very important in my life and even if i’m going to distance myself from this fandom, i will always love and cherish your writing!!! thank you for your labor of love and i won’t be forgetting about you anytime soon!!

i hope you’re doing well. take care of yourself!! have your favorite cookie!! sending hugs! <3

and ps, the scene where siren has his identity revealed is still one of my fav scenes in writing EVER and i still think about how beautifully tragic it was <3 i think about it a lot. u made me cry for like 45 minutes how dare youuuuuu hahah

I hope you know before I even read this ask I saw the url and immediately went "oh my god lostmellohi it's been so long I've missed them!!!" so, don't worry, I remember you very well and I'm so happy to see you here again!

it makes me so happy to hear how much you've enjoyed my writing over the years. hearing stuff like that only makes me more confident in my decision to not take down any of my stuff regardless of recent events. I never want to take away something of mine that has given you and others that much joy. these stories are mine first and foremost, but as readers they're yours too. they've given you so much enjoyment over the years and that can never be taken away from you.

I totally understand what you mean about being unsure if you'll be able to separate the cc and the character in the future. it's not an easy thing and right now I get the urge to wince every time I read wilbur's name, even if it's in the context of c!wilbur and/or a fic. I believe it'll get easier for all of us with time, so don't worry about it too much right now. it's only been a week since shelby's stream happened. feelings will settle.

congrats on the girlfriend!! I hope she enjoyed clinic lol. I'm so happy you've been doing better though and have been able to do more things that you love. enjoy that kind of stuff whenever you can. qsmp isn't going anywhere and you'll always be able to catch up whenever you have time.

thank you for this it genuinely made me so happy to read. wishing you the best for things in the future and I hope you take care of yourself <33

also, yeah, whenever I think back on the siren identity reveal I'm like damn I did pull that off really well huh. lmao so glad you enjoyed :)

[emotionally-estarriol]

About a year and some change ago, I decided to buy the first three Artemis Fowl books. I don't exactly remember why I wanted to read them. I had never heard anything about them when I was a kid, seeing as I only read graphic novels and historical fiction, but while wondering around Books-A-Million, I saw them, and after some out-loud debating with myself, my mom chimed in and said: "You should get them, I'm happy you're reading again."

The books just kinda sat around for a while until the day I started A Wizard of Earthsea because I also had started Artemis Fowl that same day. I had an audition later in the day, and I wanted to read something easy and fun to shake my nerves, but I ended up only reading a chapter and then forgot about it, trying to finish Earthsea.

Now, don't get me wrong, Earthsea is a phenomenal book that I now love deeply, but at the time, I was struggling to read it. So after a week of trying to brute force my way through, I decided to tell my friend (Who wanted me to read it) that I was taking a break from the book to read something else and while trying to figure out what book I was gonna read I remembered Artemis Fowl. I saw it on my bookshelf and thought, "Oh yeah, I started that, sure why not? It's middle grade. It'll be quick and easy." I then proceeded to take a month to read the first book.

A month, I know!!! Why did it take me so long? Was I not enjoying it? Did I at least pick Earthsea back up? Well, to answer that last one, the answer is no. In the entire month it took me to read Artemis Fowl, I didn't read any other books, much to the dismay of my friend, who just sat with the knowledge that I was literally 4 pages from THE massive turning point in Earthsea, but anyway, that still doesn't answer the first two questions. The simple answer to the first question is things like school, work, and rehearsal and the fact that I'm just a slow reader. The simple answer to the second was yes, 100% absolutely, but there's more to it than just those surface-level answers.

The answer to those questions is why I'm writing this in the first place, and it all starts with what my mom said to me when I first bought the books in the first place: "You should get them, I'm happy you're reading again." Cuz you see, when I was a kid, I was a reading MACHINE; from the ages of 3 to 11, I always had a book in my hand despite the fact that reading was always kinda hard because the words and letters jumped around on the page (They still do that, I'm in the process of seeing if I have dyslexia. I think I do), but I still read with passion and fervor. Reading was my first taste of escapism, full-on "transported-to-another-world" kind of escapism, and I loved it. It manifested as this warm feeling in my chest and a hazy filter on the world around me. When I got so overwhelmed by the world around me and even my own mind, the escapism from books was there to calm me down and put me at ease.

And then, one day, I stopped.

I can't tell you why I randomly stopped reading one day; I can give you some guesses, but I can't give you a concrete answer. But I stopped, and soon I grew sour towards reading, and I mean sour. Reading became "nerd shit" to me, and I held this weird, arrogant achievement of how long it had been since I stepped foot in my school's library, and over time I slowly forgot the comfort reading used to provide me.

Now, in a more cliche but sweet story, I would say Artemis Fowl was the book that got me back into reading and made me fall back in love with it, but that's not this story because the book that got me into it was none other than Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. Trust me, I was not expecting it either! But something about that book in my junior year of high school fucking rerouted my brain and sent me back to the library with a new lease on literature. But then why am I talking about Artemis Fowl? Well, let me answer those two remaining questions. I wasn't just enjoying Artemis Fowl; I was savoring it, and that's why it took me a full month to finish it.

When I decided to go back to Artemis Fowl, I often read it at night before bed (On the nights that I wasn't exhausted from a four-hour rehearsal) with a little battery-powered lantern and my cat Finny next to me. The setup was very similar to when I would read as a kid with my Ikea nightlights and my cat Smokey. And the more I read, the more I found myself saying, "This is exactly what I wanted to read as a kid!" I also was saying, "I'd be insufferable if I read these as a kid!" because Artemis was my peak idea of cool so I would've absolutely, without a doubt, adopted him into my personality, but who knows.

I didn't consciously realize it then, but the further I got into the book, the more that warm feeling in my chest returned and the stronger the hazy filter became. When I cracked this book open, I fell into its world, and it caught me in its cool, badass, loving arms, and it happened every time I went to read it. I laughed, I gasped, I cried, I had such strong feelings about it that I couldn't put it into words. It was like I didn't have the words to describe what I was feeling, much like when I was a kid.

I started Artemis Fowl on October 29th, 2022, and I finished it on November 29th, 2022. It was a full and true month in the middle of my very hectic senior year and it was probably one of the best because,

Artemis Fowl handed me a piece of my childhood back.

And it wasn't the usual kind of nostalgia that you get from finding an old toy or seeing an old cartoon from your childhood because I never interacted with Fowl as a kid! It didn't bring me to the past; it brought the past to me. And in a way that I so desperately needed as adulthood stared me down. And though I didn't know it then, I know it now.

I read Arctic Incident a couple of months later, and the feeling returned, and now, as I write this, I'm reading Eternity Code. This whole post came about because I had the idea to live-blog my experience with Eternity Code (because I read the back and WIGGED OUT), but after thinking about it for a bit, I decided against it and wrote this instead. Live blogging felt a little too personal, even though I just dumped out my fucking emotional attachment to these books for the entire internet to see. Still, it felt too personal because stopping to write felt like it would break my warm cocoon of haze, and I don't wanna lose that, not again.

I may talk about Eternity Code once I finish it, I may not (I probably won't), but I just wanted to shout into the void about what this book has done for me.

I don't believe your inner child ever goes away. Sometimes, they just get lost and need help getting back home. It may take a while, they may keep getting lost, hell, they may not even want to come home, but when they do finally come home, something just clicks into place and relief just washes over you.

If I ever meet Eoin Colfer, I'm probably gonna say something silly like, "Nah, man, I read these books when I was 17, I didn't even know they existed as a kid", but at some point, I have to thank him for these books.

Artemis Fowl didn't change me; it brought me home.

[marmixedwithabitofintellect]

The Story of You

I cannot believe we are in the end 😭😭 this story has been my safe space, my pride and joy and it has brought so many happy memories and lovely friends to me ❤️❤️ this is the start of a bittersweet goodbye, one I am not ready to partake in, but we do have to 🥺🥺 as always, come talk to me about what you think is this chapter 🥰 All the love 🤍 Mar

Disclaimer: In no way do I wish to spread hate or negative opinions about any of the characters here depicted, this is just fiction and with the purpose of entertaining you guys

Part 20: New Beginnings Part One

December 14, 2021

Harry. New York, New York. 7:00 AM

A tiny whimper pulled me out from the deep slumber I had fallen into, I turned to the side with furrowed eyes and smiled when I saw Pippa, she had managed to unswaddle herself and was busy putting her tiny hand on her mouth and opened and closed the other one. She furrowed her brows again, before she could let out a cry, I stood up and made my way to her bassinet

“Hey little miss, what’s wrong?”, I patted her bum and swayed a little before sitting back down on the bed the hospital made for me, I kissed her tiny ears before settling her in a football hold in my arms, “You look so much like your mama Pippa”, she let out a little yawn and my heart melted even more that it had before.

The smell, oh the new baby smell was something I would never ever be able to get used to, how little they are and how well they fit on my chest. I sniffled and smiled while I kissed their forehead, and let out a little laugh when they scrunched their tiny brows and forehead, “I love you baby, I am so in love with you and your mum, and I promise I will never let either of you alone ever ever again”

Y/N cleared her throat and gave us a sleepy smile, “Good morning”, I smiled at her, “Good morning lovie”, she suddenly shifted and an uncomfortable smile took over her face, I furrowed my brows, “Everything okay?”, she shook her head, “My boobs are killing me, but looking at the time she will probably be hungry soon”, as if on cue Pippa started crying and opening and closing her hands.

I handed her to Y/N and reached for the boppy pillow and helped her get settled, “Everything okay?”, she nodded and turned to see Pippa, “I cannot wait until my milk comes in”, I cleared my throat, “Would you mind if I take a shower while she eats? I’ll get you your coffee after”, she smiled, “Sure, take your time”, I got ready and when I came out, she was burping Pippa.

She gave me a small smile when there was a knock on the door, my mum showed her face and I signaled for her to come in, Gemma, Michal and my dad followed, Gemma was holding a takeout coffee tray, “Black coffee for you, and a latte for this hot mamma”, Y/N smiled and thanked her while my mum grabbed Pippa and started kissing her cheeks, “How are you even prettier that yesterday huh?”

I smiled at my mum and went to stand next to her and kissed Pippa’s cheek again and smiled, “She is the prettiest baby in the whole wide world”, another knock in the door had Betty and Dr. Reynolds, our pediatrician, in the room, Betty smiled, “Well good morning! How did we spend the night?”, Y/N smiled

“Good morning, we had a very good night”, Dr. Reynolds spoke up, “Did she eat well?”, I nodded, “Every two and a half maybe three hours”, she smiled and nodded making her way to where my mum had Pippa, she smiled before reaching for her, “Mind if I steal the little Miss for a check-up?”

Dr. Reynolds then proceeded to do a full check-up and I had to squeeze my hands when Pippa started crying due to being exposed to the cold air, “Heart and lungs sound great”, she then moved to check her hands and legs, “Tone and grip is still going strong”, I felt like a very proud father in that moment.

Dr. Reynolds swaddled Pippa again, then placed her pinkie to suckle in her mouth, “She has good latch, how many wet diapers have we had so far?”, she handed Pippa to Y/N, she placed a kiss on her head before answering, “Three so far and a poopy one dad had the best time cleaning”, we all laughed at that

“Well, Philippa has a very clean bill of health, APGAR for both times was eight and nine, hearing test was passed with flying colors, she’s eating well, sleeping beautifully, and has gotten all her shots she needs so far, as far as it concerns me, she’s ready to go home”, Y/N and I turned to look at each other with a big smile, Betty then cleared her throat

“As far as mom goes, your bleeding is normal, you’re walking, eating well, you are going to the bathroom just fine, so I see no reason to keep you here, unless you wanna stay?”, Y/N shook her head, “As much as I love all of the spoiling I miss my bed”, everyone laughed, “So, I’ll start preparing the papers but I’m thinking we’ll let you go around early afternoon okay?”, we nodded and said our goodbyes.

December 14, 2021

New York, New York. 9:00 AM

As soon as Betty and Dr. Reynolds left Gemma asked if she could hold Pippa and I handed her my little squish. I started getting up from my bed when Anne came to my side to help me, “Thank you Anne”, “Of course my darling, need any help?”, “Yes please, yesterday wasn’t so hard but today everything hurts”, when I said that Harry appeared at my side, “You okay?”

I nodded, Anne and I made our way to the bathroom where she helped me change into some comfortable knitted loungewear, when we got out of the bathroom my breakfast had arrived, “Do you mind if I eat?”, everyone shook their head and I started eating, as soon as I had my first bite Pippa let out s scream and whimper, Harry then took her from Gemma’s arms and started swaying her hoping to calm her.

I sighed, I knew that would be futile, “H, give her to me”, he gave me a worried look, “Are you sure? You just started eating”, I smiled a little, “She’s hungry, and I don’t mind feeding her while I eat, just help me get the cover, yes?”, he nodded and handed me the baby, I gave her a smile and bopped her nose

“Are you hungry tiny miss? It’s okay, momma will feed you my love”, Harry helped me get Pippa settled and then he grabbed my fork to feed me, “Harry…”, he smiled, “Please, let me help you”, I nodded and thanked him silently and he shrugged his shoulders while grabbing another piece of pancakes for me to feed, “Okay? Let me know if I’m doing good, yes?”, I swallowed before answering, “You’re doing perfectly H”

I finished my breakfast and while Anne rolled the table away, I pulled Pip from beneath the cover and burped her, after she finished letting out a burp and I handed her to Harry for a change, there was a knock on the door and Glenne and Jeff appeared in the room with the biggest smile, Glenne went to wash her hands and then grabbed Pippa from Harry’s arms, Jeff made his way to talk to me

“How are you feeling darling?”, I smiled, “Tired, a little sore but very happy, we got the all clean to head home so that makes me really excited”, before he could speak up there was a knock in the door, Anne went to open and I could hear a bit of clamoring on the entrance, a few seconds later Jason appeared with a lovely bouquet in his hands, I smiled before saying hello, “Jason hi!”

He smiled, “Well hello you! Congratulations!”, he made his way to the bed where I was sitting, he left the bouquet near my legs and leaned down for a hug, which I returned very excitedly, “ I know I owe you your meal, but I fear it was too early for me to get it”, I shook my head, “Please, don’t worry about it”, he reached for the flowers and handed them to me.

I smelled them and smiled before thanking him, he shrugged, before pulling something from his coat pocket, “Daisy was ecstatic when I told her you had your baby and drew this for you”, I opened the folded page and smiled when I saw she had drawn a baby, some balloons, and a cake, “Look at this! it’s lovely”

Glenne made her way to me and handed me Pippa, I cradled her in a football hold and Jason leaned to see her before speaking up, “Oh look at that face and those cheeks, hello cutie, what’s your name?”, I smiled, “This is Philippa Robin Styles Y/L/N, or as we now call her Pippa”, he smiled before answering, “Well hello there Pippa, my name is Jason”, he stood up straighter before clearing his throat, “Let me say hello to everyone”

December 14, 2021

Harry. New York, New York. 9:45 AM

When I saw Jason walk into the room my stomach filled up with jealousy, why did he have to be so chivalrous and educated with everyone? I rolled my eyes and gave him a small smile when he said hello to me, then reached into his bag and pulled out a pack of cigars and handed it to me, “Congratulations Harry, I know you don’t smoke but when the kids were born my friends gifted one to me and still to this day, I keep them”

I was surprised he had brought me a gift when he didn’t have to, “Thank you Jason, truly”, he shrugged and returned to talk with my mum, Gemma cleared her throat and I turned to look at her, “Would you mind coming with me to the cafeteria for a coffee?”, I sighed and nodded, Glenne spoke up, “I’ll go with you guys, anyone want anything?”, after writing down what everyone wanted we left the room.

After paying for our drinks and waiting for them to be ready, both Gemma and Glenne turned to look at me with a smirk on their face, I furrowed my brows, “You’re jealous”, I let out a laugh, “What are you talking about?”, Gemma rolled her eyes and turned to look at me, “Oh, so now we’re going to ignore the fact that you’re green with jealousy?”, I scoffed, “Stop it Gemma”

As we were walking back to the room Gemma scoffed too, “Stop it? Come on Harry, you can try and deny it all you want, but you are jealous as fuck”, anger filled my stomach, and I placed the coffee tray on the table a little harder than I wanted, which caused for some coffee to spill, “I said enough!”

Glenne stood up and walked over to us, “Guys…”, Gemma laughed sarcastically, “What can’t handle the truth, Harry?”, I turned to look at her and felt the tears in my eyes, “I can! Okay? I can and it’s killing me”, I sniffled a little, pointing to the doors of the maternity ward, “It’s killing me because I know that the woman inside there is the most wonderful, unique, beautiful human, and I fucked things up”

I then sat down on one of the sofas, Gemma sat next to me and Glenne in front of me, Gemma reached to squeeze my arm, “H… I didn’t know”, I gave her a sad small smile, “I know I fucked up, and I have regretted my decision for the longest time, and I’ll spare you the details because there are things only for us to know, but I know that one day she could wake up and decide that she doesn’t want me anymore, and I won’t tolerate that, that would actually kill me”

Gemma grabbed my hands, “I thought things were better between you too”, I cleared my tears, “They are, I think, but… what if it is only baby induced? I’m not saying that her feelings are not genuine, but also the circumstances are not helping at all, and I don’t want her to think that I only got with her because she is Pippa’s mum or to believe she is with me because I’m Pippa’s dad”

Glenne reached to squeeze my hand, “Harry, come on”, I turned to look at her, “Oh come on Glenne, you most of all people want for us not to get back together”, she furrowed her brows, “Why would you say that?”, I turned to look at her with a frown, “You have made it pretty clear that she deserves better, that she shouldn’t get back together with me, well guess what? You may have your wish granted”

I cleared my tears and turned to look at Glenne, hurt written all over her face, “I’m sorry G”, she squeezed my hand, “No, I’m sorry”, she sighed, “I admit we were friends before, but her, she’s my best friend, along with Gem here”, the three of us laughed at that, “All I want is for both of you to be happy, and you haven’t been happy in such a long time H; and Y/N, she hasn’t been herself”

My heart broke when she said that, she squeezed my hand before speaking up, “But now, life has given you both a new opportunity”, my heart started beating faster and I smiled, Pippa, the miracle we weren’t expecting, but now, I couldn’t imagine my life without her, “I know she will make the best decision for her and you and Pippa, and if that is to be with you, I’ll be your number one supporter, but if she decides it is someone else, then I’ll be there for her and you two”

Before I could speak up someone cleared their throat, the three of us turned and found Jason standing there, he gave a nod to both Gemma and Glenne before turning to look at me, “Harry do you think we could talk?”

December 14, 2021

New York, New York. 9:45 AM

After Harry left the room Anne and Jeff let us know they would go get Lambert who got lost on his way to my room, Jason sat down on the chair Jeff preciously occupied and turned to look at me before clearing his throat, “I thought we were set on a homebirth”, I laughed, “We were, but little miss impatient here decided that she wasn’t waiting for anyone”

Jason laughed, “So what happened?”, I sighed, “My water broke, and contractions went from 0 to 10 crazy fast, so I decided I wanted to come to the hospital, and I think we weren’t here for even twenty minutes before I delivered”, he blew out a breath, “She was in a hurry wasn’t she?”, I smiled and nodded

“How did you feel when you learned you had a little girl?”, an influx of emotions got to me, I sniffled and gave him a smile before looking back at Pippa, “I thought she was a boy”, he looked at me surprised, “Really?”, I nodded again, “I did, I had a dream when I was about seventeen weeks pregnant and there was  a little boy, head full of curls and the biggest dimples and green eyes”

“Spitting image of dad, and what a turn of events, a little girl who is a spitting image of her mom”, “Do you wanna hold her?”, he nodded and I transferred the baby to his arms, “Oh wow, I forgot how tiny they can be”, he rocked Pippa for a little bit before giving her back to me, “She really is a beautiful baby Y/N, and I am so happy for you”, I sniffled and gave him a smile

Jason then placed his hand on my shoulder and gave it a squeeze before giving me a smile, “You're a mom”, I teared up again and turned to look back at the little person who had stolen my heart less than 36 hours ago, I felt myself tear up and turned to look at Jason again, “I am”, I sniffled, “You were right, I didn't know what true love was until I met her”

We turned to the door when we heard a knock and I smiled when I found Lambert along with Anne and Jeff, when he saw the baby in my arms he placed a hand on his mouth, “Oh my God!”, we all laughed and Jason cleared his throat, “I should get going”, I nodded, “Thank you for stopping by, please text me next week so we can arrange for you to visit with the kids”, he nodded and gave me a side hug.

Anne smiled and handed him three of the little favors we had prepared for guests, “One for you and one for each of your babies”, “Thank you Anne, and congrats again”, they hugged each other before Jason waved as he made his way out of the room, Lamber had washed his hands and made his way to me

“How on Earth did you deliver less than two days ago?!” I laughed at that, suddenly both Gemma and Glenne came into the room, I furrowed brows, “Where’s Harry?”, Gemma gave me an apprehensive smile, “He’s speaking with Jason”, Jeff must have sensed my stress because he turned to me and said, “I’ll go see if everything is okay yeah?”, I nodded a thank you as he left the room.

December 14, 2021

Harry. New York, New York. 10:15 AM

Glenne and Gemma let us know they would head inside while Jason and I sat down on the chairs on the farthest side of the waiting room, he cleared his throat before speaking up, “First of all congratulations again Harry, you guys have a very beautiful little girl”, I smiled when he said that “Thank you Jason, truly”, he nodded, he rubbed his hands before continuing to speak up

“Listen, I know I’m not your favorite person, and well let’s not lie to each other you are not mine”, we both let out a little laugh at that, “But I really wanted to talk to you and clear things up, you don0t have to worry about me or Y/N being anything more than friends, truly”, I turned to look at him surprised, he laughed a little, “Aside from the fact that she still is very much in love with you as you are with her”, I looked down bashfully and he cleared his throat

“I’m the bigger person here, and we both know that, and we won’t be getting into unnecessary details”, I nodded because even if I wanted to defend myself, he was right, I could’ve said no and I still didn’t, I sighed before speaking up, “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry Jason”, I turned to look at him and he gave me a half smile, “I know”

After a few moments of silence, I asked him, “How is she?”, he sat up straighter, “Sad, angry at herself; I know she told you that I warned her, so she feels dumb for heeding my warning. I never did it out of malice, but I see the way you look at Y/N, you have never stopped doing so”, I turned to look at him, “What do you mean?”

He gave me a fatherly smile, “You look at her and see the person you love, who shares your hopes and dreams, the one you want to come home to at the end of your day, the mother of your children; the way I saw Olivia once”, my heart broke for him, “Jason… I am sorry for how I treated you, I cannot speak for her, but I can do so for myself”

He pat me on the back, “I’ve forgiven you Harry, a while ago, but I need to ask something from you”, I nodded, “Don’t let her go, every; she deserves the happiness life has to offer, and life has given you a second chance to give it to her, so don’t waste it”, I smiled, “I won’t”, we both stood up and as I brought up my hand for a handshake he pulled me into a hug.

When we pulled back, I squeezed his shoulder and cleared my throat, “I hope you can bring Otis and Daisy to visit soon, I won’t be there because I don’t want to confuse them, but they are so excited”, he nodded and we turned when we saw Jeff approach, Jason said his goodbyes and left

“Everything okay?”, I nodded, “Everything is okay”, he patted my back, and we made our way back to the room, when we came in, I found Harry Lambert there fawning over Pippa, he turned to look at me and indignantly said, “Where the hell where you? This queen won’t tell me this angel’s gender until you were here”

I laughed, “I was talking with somebody, how did you get to the room, and I didn’t see you?”, he pulled me into a hug, “Turns out there are two entrances to this floor, congratulations Sue, I’m so happy for you!”, I pulled back with a smile and reached in for Pippa and walked back to where Lambert was standing

“Any last guesses?”, he hummed, “I was set on little boy, but now i think we have a little girl”, I smiled at him, “Let me introduce you to Philippa Robin Styles Y/L/N”, he let out a gasp, “Stop! That is the cutest name! Hi Pippa, hi little love”, he reached in for her hand which had escaped the swaddle, “Oh thank God she looks like her mother”, everyone let out a laugh while I whined out a “Heeey”

“Can I hold her?”, I nodded and carefully transferred the little baby into her arms, “Oh look at those cheeks, I’m in love with her”, as he swayed, he nodded to the two Gucci boxes settled on the couch behind him, “One is from me and the other is from Alessandro”, I grabbed them and brought them to the bed so we could open them.

Y/N pulled the ribbon on the first one and pulled a little oat envelope with a copper wax seal, when she opened it, she pulled out a card written by Alessandro which read: Benvenuto al Mondo Piccolo Bambino, che tu possa essere sempre circondato da tutti noi che ti vogliamo bene, non vedo l'ora di conoscerti! Con tutto il mio affetto, tuo zio Ale (Welcome to the World Little Baby, may you always be surrounded with all of us who love you, I cannot wait to meet you! All my love, your uncle Ale)

She teared up when she handed me the card to read and removed the wrapping paper, “Oh Harry looks at this!”, Alessandro had sent a Gucci blanket in a cream and grey tone, I then proceeded to open Harry’s gift and found another beautiful cream Gucci blanket, he smiled and told us, “We know mumma would appreciate a useful gift”

Y/N smiled, “I do, I’ll have to text Alessandro for sure”, she then cleared her throat, “Lamby, Mitch and Sarah are coming over for dinner tonight, wanna come too?”, he turned to see her, “I don’t wanna intrude”, she shook her head, “Nonsense, we are celebrating we have a new family member”, he smiled and nodded, “I’ll bring dessert then”

December 14, 2021

New York, New York. 11:35 AM

Lambert, Jeff, and Glenne left a few minutes ago and while Gemma and Anne helped us pack, I was feeding Pippa, Harry was finishing filling the discharge papers, Betty popped into the room and smiled, “How are doing? Ready to go?”, we nodded, “So, Mis Pippa her has received her shots, she’s feeding well, she was wet and poopy diapers, you are doing wonderful, her jaundice is awesome, so as soon as she is done eating you guys are free to go home”

Harry and I smiled at that, “If it is okay with you, I will see you in about four weeks, but you have my number for anything you need, and I know you have booked her first appointment in three days correct?”, we nodded, “Okay, wow, I cannot believe we are here”, she sniffled, “I’m so proud of you two, I know… I know things were kinda rough between you too, but I’m proud you have been able to work together for her”

Betty reached for my hand and for Harry’s hand gave them a squeeze, “I have had so many parents do so well at the beginning, but for things to go South in a few months, and although I have a feeling that won’t be your case, please put Pippa first”, I sniffled, “Thank you Betty for being a friend through all these months”, she pulled me into a hug

“Thank you for letting me be your friend”, she then pulled Harry into a hug and whispered something into his ear which had him laughing, she then caressed Pippa’s cheek, who had just let out a hearty burp, “You continue to grow up strong and happy little darling”, she said her goodbyes to Anne and Gemma and left the room.

Harry came and sat near my crossed legs on the bed, “Are you ready?”, I shook my head, “But will we ever be?”, he laughed at that, Anne cleared her throat, “We will bring this to the car while you guys get ready to leave okay?”, we nodded and they left the room, we turned to see Pippa who was peacefully sleeping on my legs, I ran my knuckled down her cheek, “Are you ready to go home Pip?”

She let out a whimper and a stretch and we smiled at that, Harry handed me the outfit I had chosen for her to go home in and changed her, once she was ready I took some pictures and then we placed her into her car seat and I stood next to Harry, he offered me his hand and I grabbed it, he squeezed it and pulled me into a side hug and kissed my temple

“Are you ready?”, I nodded, “Let’s do this”, we pulled up the canopy and adjusted the stroller cover we had bought and we made our way out of the room, we stop at the nurse’s station and thanked them again for all of their help, they were the sweetest to us and wished us all of the best, and as we said goodbye, we made our way home with our little girl.

Two lovely nurses were walking with us to the car in order to make sure that Pippa was well buckled, Harry got into the driver’s seat, Gemma on the passenger’s seat, Anne, Pippa, and I crammed in the back, I was so tired I fell asleep on the way home. About twney five minutes later I was woken up by Anne who let me know we were here.

Harry pulled out the car seat and while Gemma and Anne grabbed the bags we made our way upstairs, I unlocked the door and we stood in the hallway, Harry placed Pippa’s car seat on the floor and unbuckled her, he stood up and handed her to me, I kissed her cheek while he kissed her head, “Wanna give her a tour of her home?”

I nodded and we started walking, I started whispering to her, “Welcome home Pip, let me give you the grand tour; so when you walk down the entrance hall you will find the living room, this is where we spend most of our time and enjoy listening to music and reading, this is also where you were supposed to be born little miss”, I kissed her little forehead and she let out a grunt

“If we turn to the left we find the kitchen, this is where we will have so many dance parties and you will learn to bake and cook and be my little sous chef”, we got out of the kitchen and walked down the hall to where the rest of the apartment was, I opened a door, “This is the guest room where your daddy is staying, it is a very cozy room with a lot of light, I’m sure you guys will have a lot of naps here, and over there is his bathroom”

We exited the guest room and made our way to my room, “This is mommy’s room, this is where you will be sleeping for the time being honey, it is the warmest room in the whole apartment and it has the best light” I then moved to the bathroom, “This is our bathroom lovie, I say our because your nursery does not have one, but I don’t mind sharing with you”, I turned off the light and we walked to the nursery.

Harry and I turned to look at each other and smiled, he opened the door and we walked inside, I sniffled while I swayed with Pippa in my arms, “This is your room my heart”, Harry then cleared his throat, “Your auntie Sarah and your uncle Mitch helped us get it ready for you my love”, he kissed her forehead

“I know you will not use it for a bit, but we prepared it with our whole heart for you”, he reached in for Pippa and I placed her in his arms, I cleared my throat, “Do you mind if I shower while she is still sleeping?”, he nodded, I kissed both of their foreheads and left the nursery, smile on my face while I heard him hum ‘Canyon Moon’

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