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moody-alcoholic · 6 months ago

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On a Wing and a Prayer

Part 5 - You Should Always Check Your Sources

CW: Angst, language, mentions of torture

Previous parts - masterlist - next

When you enter the room with John, Kate stands up looking over at you. She picks her laptop up like she’s packing to leave.

“Stay.” You say. You don’t want to be alone in a room with John. She looks at John waiting for his nod of approval before sitting back down. He walks over to a drawer pulling a file out. He hands it to you. You open it, the first pages are just generic report stuff. You flick through it until you come across some pictures.

Pictures, well CCTV screenshots of you. In London, you have no idea where they were taken or when but it looks like you. The same hair, even the same coat you wear. You’re meeting up with someone for coffee from the looks of it. You don’t recognise the other person though.

“What's this?” You ask confused. The next page shows the transcript of a call between you and someone else.

“A phone call between you and a man called; Andrei Nolan. He’s Makarovs right hand man.” John says you look up at him frowning.

“I’m assuming he’s the man in the photos too?” You ask flicking back to them. You look up at John who nods. You don’t even recognise the guy, he could have been someone you just hooked up with or bumped into. You try to think back but the date on the CCTV screenshot is marked out.

You hand the folder back to John.

“I don’t even recognise the guy.” You say. You cross your arms, you don’t expect him to believe you.

“We caught him in Russia about a week ago. He was more than happy to talk about your meetings.” John says.

“Meetings?” You question raising an eyebrow. You don’t like this, this is feeling all too familiar to the last few days. You’re one step away from having a rag pressed on your face again.

“We assumed you were selling secrets to him.” Jon says. You scoff, looking over at Kate who tips her head slightly watching you both.

“What changed your mind?”

“Our mole in Konni gave us intel that exonerated you.” Kate says.

“That’s why it took so long, we had to assume the worst until we could prove any different.” He sighs, you look at him. “We had to do our job. If we didn’t we could have been accused of harboring a traitor, giving you special exemptions.”

You laugh, you can't believe what he's saying. You can feel tears welling back up in your eyes. You turn away. You won’t let him see you cry. You hear him take a step towards you, you freeze. He sighs almost like he’s trying to find the right words to say.

“I really am sorry. I never thought it would come to this but our hands were tied we-”

“You had a choice.” You snap, turning back to look at him. “You always have a choice. You told me that once.”

“I-”

“No! You had a choice and you chose this. You could have let me rot in a cell for a few days. Or suspended me, hell I would have taken a flight back to the UK as a traitor. Instead you-” The words catch in your throat tears escape your eyes. You step back away from him, swallowing hard.

“I want a transfer.” You say finally trying to keep your voice level. You wait for his response, your eyes digging into him. He straightens up, now he looks like he’s about to cry. Good, you hope they feel horrible for what they did.

“Why don’t you think about it for a few days. You don’t have anywhere to be, you can take some time to rest.” Kate says. You look over at her.

“Rest?” You scoff, looking back at John. “I can’t sleep without being back in that room over and over again. I can’t wash my hands or take a shower without having flashbacks. Everytime I see you I panic, thinking something new will happen, more ‘evidence’ against me and I’ll be back in that room again.”

John doesn’t say anything, his eyes are relaxed, his lips pressed together. You hope the guilt is eating him alive. You can see the dark circles under his eyes, the way he clenches his fists when you talk to him.

“I want a transfer.” You say again holding your ground. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t say anything, just nods his head slightly. You let out a shaky breath. You nod back at him and turn to leave, you thought it would feel like a weight has been lifted but instead you feel worse.

You’re turning your back on the people you love, the people you spent the last 2 years with. The people you thought you would spend the rest of your life with. It hurts. Maybe more then the torture at least the physical part. The betrayal, the emotional toll of having the people you love hurt you so much.

“Johnny knows by the way.” You say as you open the door and you leave without looking back.

—--------------

“You need to calm down Johnny.” Simon says as Johnny’s trying to get out of bed.

“He’s right Soap, you’re no good to anyone like this, you've just had major surgery.” Kyle says trying to help Simon get control of the situation.

“Fuck you.” Johnny snaps, pulling his arm out of Simon's grip and swinging his legs out the bed.

“What’s going on?” John asks as he enters the room taking in the scene.

“You tortured her. For 4 days you made her suffer, what were you thinking?” Johnny asks John in almost disbelief. “The snakes really? Low even for you.”

“Does it matter?” John asks, coming into the room sighing.

“What the fuck is wrong with you two?” Johnny asks scoffing and looking between Simon and John.

“Of course it fuckin’ matters. She’s our girl cap. Or did you forget that?” There's spite in Johnny’s voice as he digs his eyes into John.

“Get back into bed.” John says walking up to the bed.

“Fuck no. I want to see her.” Kyle pushes Johnny back, keeping him in the bed.

“You know she’ll just drag you back here.” Kyle says. Johnny grunts, giving up pushing against him, he’s too weak anyway. He sighs, shaking his head.

“You really thought it was her?” He asks.

“The intel we had was solid.” John says. Kyle scoffs this time, Johnny looks up at him raising an eyebrow.

“Does it justify 4 days of torture though?” Kyle says, there’s spite in his voice too. John sighs, he can regret it all he wants but it happened and that's on him and Simon.

“Regardless, we had to act on it.” Simon says coming round to the end of the bed.

“We should have done it differently.” John says.

“You think?” Johnny snaps looking over at him. Johnny shakes his head again. He swings his legs back into the bed, Kyle lets out a breath of release.

“I can’t believe it. You fucking broke her. The person we’re supposed to love. 4 days, 4 fucking days.” Johnny pinches the bridge of his nose. There’s silence in the room, tension thick in the air.

“What are we going to do?” Johnny asks no one in particular.

“Nothing.” John says, everyones eyes turn to him. “She’s asked for a transfer.”

—--------------

You walk into Johnny’s room around midnight. You couldn’t sleep again. You’re sick of sleeping. The pills don’t help, they just make you feel trapped in your dreams. You try to silently enter and pull a chair up to his bed but he stirs awake.

“Hey lass,” he says, turning in the bed to face you. He looks sad, his face puffy. He’s been crying.

“I didn’t mean to wake you.” You whisper.

“Come up.” He says shuffling in the bed and pulling the covers out the way.

“I shouldn’t-”

“You should.” He says cutting you off. You smile and reach town to take your boots off. He moves to get more comfortable as you climb into bed next to him. He immediately wraps his arms around you pulling the thin hospital blankets over you.

You lay there for a few seconds, breathing him in. He smells of hospital, but there’s a hint of Johnny there, the lingering smell of gunpowder and whatever musky cologne he uses. It makes you smile as you rest your head on his shoulder.

“Trouble sleeping?” He asks, kissing the top of your head. You hum.

“Me too.”

You’re comfortable laying up against him. Suddenly you feel bad for leaving, you don’t know how you’re going to tell Kyle and Johnny. You need to go though, it's better for everyone. You can’t work with them again, not after what they did.

Johnny and Kyle will understand. You’re sure they will.

“I’m sorry you got shot.” You say, it feels like something you have to say.

“Shh, you saved my life love. I wouldn't be here if it wasn’t for you.” He says kissing your head again. His hands are running over you like it’s the first time he’s touching you. You know that’s a lie, you have to convince yourself they can save themselves. They would be lost without each other, they wouldn’t be lost without you.

You’re going to miss him. You close your eyes, breathing him in relaxing your arm over his stomach while he strokes you.��

You’ll see them again, keep in contact with Kyle and Johnny at least. You just can’t work with them anymore.

“I love you Johnny.” You say, it hurts. For the first time ever it hurts to say it.

“I know love. I love you too.” You smile letting him hug you tighter. You try to stay away but your eyes are heavy, the sounds of the machines lulling you to sleep.

You’ll tell them tomorrow you promise yourself.

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wrtzia · 4 months ago

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That’s no worries at all 🫶🫶I look forward to reading it!! I’m sure whatever you come up with will be great!!

What we are - Request

Warning ; mention of sex, first time, Reader is the only girl, frenemies, suggestive content

Notes : I went for a suggestive content and no smut because I was more comfortable writing it this way, hope you will still like it. Let me know your thoughts, if you liked it I might do a part 2 where they talk about it. It took me a WHILE to find out how to correctly write it, and I'm still not sure if it's okay, but I actually like it. Turned out really long too.

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ The Glade wasn’t an easy place to live, but you had made it work. Being the only girl here had its own set of challenges, especially given how lonely you were and how you always acted tough. Some of the boys went out of their way to be overprotective, which could tend to annoy you, while others didn’t know how to talk to you like a normal person, didn't know how to act near a girl. Gally was neither of them and yet both at the same time.

Gally had always been different. He wasn’t cruel, people who didn’t know him well enough like Thomas could say he was with wrong assumptions. He was sharp-edged. His words could sting, his looks could burn, but beneath it all, you knew there was something else. Something unspoken.

“Hey, you gonna do something useful today, or just stand there?” His voice cut through the air as you helped stack crates near the Blood House. His tone was rough, but you could see the way his eyes lingered on you. He was observing you and despite his tough look, for you his eyes always looked more soft, showing just a bit more of love.

The way his eyes would look at you always caused a feeling of confusion in your heart. It was so evident he didn’t hate you, that something else was behind it all, but at the same time you thought it would be easier if he hated you. Perhaps if he did, you wouldn’t feel your heart flutter and the butterflies in your belly every time he would soften around you.

You rolled your eyes, placing the last crate down with a little more force than necessary. “I don’t know, Gally. Maybe I should leave all the hard work to you since you clearly love bossing people around.” and despite both of your attitudes, you didn’t hate each other. Behind all the ‘mean’ words, the roll of eyes, the annoying comments, love was hidden. Your relationship was really clear for you, and for the boy too. The gladers couldn’t understand and that was something you cherished ; them not knowing what your heart was feeling everytime you laid eyes on him.

He scoffed but didn’t fire back with a remark. Instead, he grabbed a cloth from his pocket and tossed it to you, letting his soft spot for you showing. “You got dirt on your face.”

Every time his attitude towards you would fall, it was as if you won the argument. So every time, a smug smirk would meet your face. You used his cloth to clean your face before walking toward your hut, as the night was setting. You didn’t need to turn back to know he was following you.

You entered your hut and Gally was quick to grab your wrist in a firm but gently hold, turning you around. Your faces were close, you could feel his warm breath against your cheek, his eyes were staring at your lips before he spoke your name in a gentle voice.

Was today the day he would finally let his guard down, the day he would finally tell you his feelings, those you knew about but always pretended you didn’t, not wanting to take the first step ? He frowned, his voice coming out rasping. “How the hell are you doing this to me ?”

Your eyes met his, your mouth about to answer before his lips stopped them, kissing you deeply. Your whole body froze, confusion filling you. Part of you knew his feelings for you, and obviously you loved him too. Your brain had trouble taking in the fact his dry lips were on yours, one hand holding you wrist while the other was making its way under your shirt. “..You make me feel crazy. I want to keep you buried in my arms but I also want to insult you every second..”

For the first time in your life, or atleast for what you remembered, you felt your heart beat like crazy, you could feel how red your cheeks were. You swore your legs could shatter at any moment, considering how shaky they were. As if Gally could sense it, he easily picked you up, his hands meeting your plush thighs. You could feel the warmth radiating from his hands on your whole legs, his thumb tracing small patterns causing you to shiver from the touch. “..I love you so goddamn much”

His eyes looked at you, his expression unreadable. You could see the love but you could also see the incertitude, as if what he said to you was hard to admit, as if he was unsure if he was doing the right thing or if you would get afraid and run away. But you didn’t.

You hadn’t expected his lips to attack your neck, and even less his hands to start taking your top off. Panic quickly set inside of you, suddenly you weren’t sure being there was a good idea. But then you remembered who was there, with you. It wasn’t anyone - it was this big asshole, the one who would treat you like crap only to be the most protective guy towards you. The one who would cradle you to his chest every time another glader would lose their life, but who spent his whole days telling you how much he hated you.

Your back was against the hammock, the pretty boy hovering above you. You were vulnerable, more than ever, but you wanted it. So with slight incertitude, you allowed yourself to speak the following words. ''Gally...I’ve never done that before''

His eyes met yours, not so surprised about what you just confessed. He himself didn't have much experience since there weren't many girls here, except for you. That didn't mean he didn't know what to do, and how to do it. In the world they were in, danger at the door, you actually didn't expect him to know anything.

The danger around.

The danger around you seemed to fade. With Gally above you, your mind pushed aside all the fears—the Grievers, the threats outside. They no longer mattered. It was as if Gally was protecting you, putting a wall around the two of you.

You felt safe with him.

His words brought you back to the intimate moment the two of you were having,reassuring your racing mind, ''It's okay, don't know much myself.'' and his hands worked to take his shirt off, about to take yours as well before he stopped, putting a light kiss on your neck. ''We don't have to do anything if you're not ready, pretty thing.''

And you shook your head, because you were ready. You were just scared, scared because you didn’t know anything about it, nobody never taught you. But you trusted him, you knew he would be careful with you. You knew he cared. He was showing it everyday, and he was showing it today by taking his time with you. Your voice came out softly, almost in a whisper but he heard it, “..I’m ready as long as it’s with you.”

His calloused hands undressed you, taking his time to worship you, making sure every inch of your soft skin was kissed, caressed. You didn’t know how such small things could make your heart be so crazy, how that could cause your legs to press together before he would spread them. When he took his pants off, eyes ending on his boxers, you could have swore your eyes rolled in the back of your head. His chest was warmth against yours, his heart pounding beneath his chest, syncing with yours as if you were the same. You made one.

He didn’t take care of himself, didn’t allow you to put your attention anywhere else than on your pleasure. The only thing that mattered right now was you. Not the griever, not the newbie, you. The way he was, soft, careful, slow, it was different from what you knew. Different in a good way, you loved the way he was currently acting, as if you were the only in his eyes. As if nothing else existed. For a moment, the world outside didn’t exist. The Glade, the Grievers, the chaos—it was all gone. It was just the two of you.

You didn’t know how you ended there, your first time and virginity being taken by your worst enemies but also your best friend. What you knew was how soft his touches and kisses felt, how well the two of you fit together. He took his time with you, showed you love. For the first time, you didn’t get any mean remarks, only words pure with love and admiration.

You never thought you would get the opportunity to lose your virginity, even less to Gally. But now that it was happening, you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞

Main masterlist - part 2

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megistusdiary · 1 year ago

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people sleep on dehya r u kidding me...

the abs, the fake kitty ears, her voice(!!), she's my knight in shining armour and i absolutely need her to bend me over. have you seen the metal claws on her hand? are we all thinking the same thing!???

everytime dehya loses in my polls, an angel dies tbh

she's literally my dream woman. tall, muscular, gorgeous, but she's also so funny and protective ugh. need her. :(

i'm also a huge kitty dehya enthusiast. i love the idea of big kitty dehya.

since this is my only chance to write for dehya, might as well give you the works, babe 😚

dehya x fem!reader

dom!dehya x sub!fem reader

warnings: smut (mdni), wlw content, cunnilingus, fingering, strap penetration

"aww, good girl!" she praises with a little smile, two fingers, knuckle-deep in your pussy as you sit on her lap.

her other hand rests around you, keeping you curled up against her as she kisses your temple, grinding her palm into your clit.

"does that feel good?" she asks, almost teasingly, knowing your reply will be little whines of her name and mumbled pleas.

she can hear how wet you are, the evidence strung over her fingers as she fucks them into you faster, grinding into your clit and g-spot until you cum, squirming in her lap.

she lets you rest, instead laying back on the bed to shimmy her shorts off, spreading her legs and inviting you to lay between them to eat her out.

her thighs shake as your softer hands lay against them, holding them down while you lick her clit gently. her head tips back when your lips wrap around the sensitive nerves, sucking at them.

her thighs squeeze your head when your tongue pushes into her pussy, her hands gripping the bedsheets. her hips move on their own, grinding on your nose and tongue as she chases her own high, using you as she wishes.

once she finishes, she pulls you up, kissing you messily, sliding her tongue over yours to taste herself. then, you find yourself shoved onto the bed face-down, ass up, glistening cunt on display.

you can hear the sound of a metal harness behind you, and you're almost tempted to turn and peek at which one she's chosen. her hand pats your hip gently, dragging the tip through your wetness before she's slowly sliding in.

your cute little whimpers mixed with your pussy fluttering around her has her groaning. "you're so cute." she praises you, rubbing circles into your hips as she pushes in deeper.

your pussy flutters around the faux cock, mumbling about how it's too much. how she always chooses something a little too thick for you, just to watch you squirm.

"pretty girl, you're almost there. just a little more." she coos, easing the last bit of her strap into you, bottoming out as she smooths a hand down your back. "good girl... good fucking girl."

#genshin smut #genshin impact #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader smut #fem reader #genshin wlw #dehya smut #dehya x reader #dehya genshin #dehya #💌─𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭! ༊*·˚#💐─𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘴 #✎─𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 ❛ ༉‧₊˚#🌸─𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘺

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princessbrunette · 1 year ago

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popes new gig as a driving instructor was meant to be easy money. he was a good, safe driver — and you were his first ever client. but from the smile you’d given him, all glittery and pink as you bounce over to his car and lean over to his driver seat window to greet him, giving him a direct look down your cleavage — he knew you’d do more than learn driving from him.

you preened under his praise everytime. it was distracting. he was trying to teach you how to safely drive, but everytime he’d let “you’re doing really good, keep going.” or a simple “good job.” leave his mouth you’d nearly swerve off the road. his subtle tips and adjustments would be met with flirtation, and giggly “yes sir”s to the point where he’d forget the rules of the road in an instant.

this went on for weeks, and due to his best friend jj’s constant lecturing regarding; ‘dude, you’ve got a hot ass girl in your car, practically begging for the D — you’re telling me you haven’t swooped on that yet? do better, man.’ pope decided enough was enough. this was either going to fix his problem, or make things really awkward— but it was a risk he was willing to take.

“pull up right here, in this parking lot.” he’d been extra tense that day, rather quiet the entire lesson with a stiff jaw and eyes hung low. you figured he’d been in a bad mood, and even went easy on your usual routine of finding reasons to touch his bicep at each stop light and flirting with him. you did as he said, pulling into the empty lot and finding a space somewhere in some dark corner where it would be easy for you to park.

without the humming of the engine filling the silence now, you turn and look at him in the dim lighting. pope often had two ways of going about things with women — either ultra nervous, or ultra to the point. with you, he’d started off a nervous wreck — practically jizzing in his pants every time you’d graze your manicure against his arm for the first few lessons, but due to the constant teasing he’d been driven to being directly upfront with you.

“look, i can’t take all this teasing anymore.” he stresses, brows creased. your giggly smile drops a little bit, seemingly switching on the innocent act. “every week, you hint and hint that you’re tryna get into something with me— and then at the end of the lesson, you just get out and walk away like it never happened.” he sighs hard, and you have to admit it’s rather cute.

“i’m sorry…” your brows knit together, guilt evident in your expression.

“and that’s fine — i would never pressure you to do anything like that, and believe me — i know this is completely unprofessional to be proposing on the job, and yeah — this could get me fired,” he rambles, working himself up. “but look, i’m a man okay? i am biologically programmed to have a bodily reaction to girls like you who can’t stop touching on me and being all adorable and sexy. that being said — if you wanna fuck, let’s just get it out the way, right here right now— and if not, we can drive you home, and never talk of this again. but you gotta stop acting like that, ‘cause i’m in pain.” he finishes up with his rant, sucking in a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding the entire time. you stare at pope. pope stares back.

“oh fuck, oh pope!” you mewl into his neck as the car jostles violently from the backseat beneath the dim lighting on the parking lot. you’re naked from the waist down, and his shorts sit pooled around his ankles as you bounce on his cock, dick impaled through you. “s—so big, just like i imagined!”

“you imagined?” he pants, two hands planted on your waist as he helps you fuck down on his lap, staring up at you hopefully as he lifts his hips to meet your movements.

“every night! pictured you punishing me for bein’ such a tease!” you cry out in admission, halting the bouncing technique to roll your hips instead, the two of you groaning at the sensation.

“jesus, okay… well, i can definitely make that happen. you for sure deserve to be punished.” he babbles, pulling you closer — his eyes fluttering shut as you grind on him.

“are you g’nna punish me pope? for teasin’ you in our lessons?” your voice cracks desperately as you feel him repeatedly jutting against your g-spot, making your legs shake around him.

“yes. totally. i’ll punish you real good.” he spits out. it had been a while since he’d got his dick wet, especially from such a perfect princess — so all his concentration was going into making sure he didn’t bust right there and then. he simply agreed without thinking, he probably would have agreed to anything in that moment.

#div by v6que #drivinginstructor!pope #new au just dropped. again #pope heyward prompt

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rumitome · 21 days ago

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HEYYYYY!! for the s/o ask game 🪽🥂🤍💍 (you can chose 2-3 of them if four is too much but I’m so curious)

HI LOVEEE TYSM FOR THE ASK MWUAH MWAH (ㅅ˙³˙)♡ i've already done the other two in this -> post and i'll probably upload the 🥂 one later because i feel like this has become too long (⁠人⁠⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)

🤍 — what are your love languages VS. your s/o’s? How do you show theirs and how do they show yours?

i generally love showing my love towards others through physical touch, but when it comes to scara, on the other hand.. i just feel so uncomfortable with it? like, whenever we would hug or kiss in public, i just feel so exposed—like all eyes are on us so i usually end up pushing him away. it's probably because i just hate pda, but to him it's the opposite, he actually enjoys flaunting the fact that we are in a relationship. but still, he never oversteps his boundaries—whenever he senses that im uncomfortable, he pulls back. instead, he does small and gentle things like linking our pinky fingers or brushing my hair out of my face. he stays patient, doing little gestures like that until i feel ready to do more, like holding hands or other things.

on the other hand, i really value quality time—and it is quite evident with how much i enjoy spending time with my friends rather than doing things alone. it is also clear in how i plan my dates with scara and always make the effort to attend his fashion shows just to support him. or whenever scara feels overwhelmed, we’ll often take quiet walks together, finding comfort in each other's silence. but there are also times where i would stay behind in the fashion design wing of our university until late at night, buried in multiple projects and looming deadlines. and everytime, without fail, i would find him sitting beside me—sometimes silently watching me as i work, other times sketching in his sketchbook or even helping me with my projects. and once im done working, he would always accompany and bring me home. when i ask him if it's because he loves me and he cares about me, he usually brushes it off with a smug, “it’s just because you’re afraid of the dark—and mona might kill me if i don’t walk you home.” (but honestly? he does loves and cares about me <33)

scara is generally terrible at expressing himself with words, so he often shows his love through acts of service. like how he helps me with my sketches, buys fabrics for me, and even fix the things i accidentally broke without asking any questions. he also remembers every little detail about me and pays attention in things i like, dislike and even my habits. and honestly, it makes it more harder to believe that he supposedly hated me for the past six years considering how deeply he knows me. on the other hand, whenever he feels overwhelmed, i would always be there—bringing him his favorite food and drink and staying by his side until he is ready to open up again. during his fashion shows, i’m the one adjusting his outfit, smoothing out every wrinkle, and fixing that eyeliner he loves so much.

on the other hand, he also loves giving me gifts he knows i will love. like popmart blind boxes for example as well as plushies and makeup. and whenever i ask him what the occasion is, he just shrugs and says, "just thought you'd like it". and there was even one time when he gave me two entire sketchbooks that are just filled with drawings of me—sketches of me listening in class, working on my projects and even portraits of me... basically, i’m his muse at this point. he even submitted a painting of me as a project for one of his classes. (love me a good fine arts major). meanwhile i love giving him handmade gifts—crocheted plushies, hand-crafted jewelry—because let’s be real, he can afford to buy anything he wants since he's rich af as a model already. but the things i make? they’re made with love, time, and care. and he knows nothing he can buy will ever compete with the gifts i make just for him.

#rumi ask game <33 #rumi's modern genshin dr #shiftblr #reality shifting #shifting realities #shifting blog

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patheticpoems · 27 days ago

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Hi Poem, I'm so glad to have found your blog because you actually seem to have an understanding of the law. I'd really really appreciate if you'd please help me out.

I've known about loass since 2020. I've had my void obsession phase, read neville, listened to edward art, read a plethora of content on reddit, tumblr and twt. Atp i nnow enough to teach another person.And after all this overconsumption, it has come down to assume and persist.

But everytime I assume, I'm like, 'Alright I have my dream life. It is done',I'm hit with a bunch of negative thoughts like a freight train. I know that these thoughts and emotions do not matter. I keep questioning myself- if I've assumed correctly, if I actually decided or not. I never get this calm, assured knowing that I have my desires. It just seems like I'm normally thinking of it. And it makes me question if this is wishful thinking or is it the 'knowing' I'm supposed to hold on to (ik I'm talking in circles now, but please bear with me😭).

I also know the fact that only I can 'know' what knowing is supposed to be like, if that makes sense😭. And because of all this doubting and questioning, I never persist for more than a day or two, thinking I'm doing something wrong. This has resulted in me wasting years because I keep going through the same cycle of ovedconsumption, getting motivated, applying, doubting and then giving up. Its funny because i know im getting in my own way. I'm tired, I want to do away with all the terminology and just manifest my dream life.

Help pls😭

you have not wasted anything, don't say that. waste is something you can never repurpose and you're the sole operator, that's basically akin to being a DIY mom, you can always turn things into something useful if you just change your perception. there is no wasted anything when you control everything.

now, you stated having negative thoughts and generally doubting yourself (specifically). I'm gonna try and tackle everything I find worth commenting on one by one so bear with me.

It is evident you know the facts, you know how things go and the outline of everything and whilst that should help stabilise you instead it is doing the opposite. It is one thing to know that something you do doesn't affect your manifestation or that a limiting belief is only a belief, but it is another to believe it. You certainly don't need to believe it, no, but this issue then dips into the next one of your doubt over your own abilities. With the amount of stuff you've consumed it is hard to cancel out all the 'don't do this' 'do this' even when you know its just assume its persist.

So, how do we actually deal with this?

I want you to just put a pause for a moment. Stop thinking. This is not a trick question, just be honest. Tell me, who are you? What is your life like? Whatever words, whatever visual came up, that's your perception of you and your world. You identify with that. You feel you can't be doing things right because you don't believe you know what right feels like. Knowing isn't grand. Isn't special. It is like knowing I'm gonna have an egg sandwich tomorrow morning.

So ask yourself, why do you feel you are unreliable to trust or more specifically, why are the new assumptions you're setting so untrustworthy? Obvious answer, you don't believe it, you don't have to, but that's where consistency comes in. It's like slowly learning to swim. Scary at first, very new and mysterious, but you get the hang of it and eventually your body doesn't want to leave the new temperature its adjusted to.

If this, if that, if, if, if, what if you did. What if you did do it right? What if you didn't sabotage yourself because you find this to be far fetched emotionally? What if you reminded yourself that these negative thoughts came in because you need to keep pushing till you leave the comfort you have with being in the current state. Tough pill to swallow but, there is no magic fixer upper.

You stay consistent and eventually, it stops being something you have to do and something you just do. You stop knowing and you start experiencing. Metaphorically, it's like love, you hear about it, you may internalise ideas of it and you may say you know it but being in it is different. You want this. You really want this. So keep going. You have negative thoughts? Ignore them. Ignore. Them. Because not a damn thing they have done for you before and nothing good that they'll do for you now. It's a leech. Save yourself, save you, because you know you want that.

It'll suck, for a while it'll feel impossible to do it over and over every day, but don't you think some tolerance is worth it for finally being about to relax? This comes down to discipline and trusting your wants for once, your heart nto your mind.

#poems asks 🐈‍⬛️#loa blog #loa tumblr #loass #loassumption #manifesation #manifesting #law of assumption #loablr #loassblog

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hellodaekko · 5 months ago

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collection of morgan/seer obscura headcanons for the soul. My soul, specifically.

• Seer Obscura was selectively mute for the better portion of their childhood, they didn’t start breaking out of it until late highschool and when given the choice, they choose to be quiet. They have less than a handful of people that can bring the chatterbox out of them and one of them is Morgan once they’re really comfortable with him.

• Morgan is a certified yapper, and while Seer Obscura is more comfortable being talkative around him, they still prefer to listen to him more than they do to chime in. Despite this, Morgan makes the very earnest effort to engage with them past just talking at them so he checks in often.

“What did you do today?”

“Did you eat today?”

“Oh that sounds tasty, is it your favorite?”

“How about you?”

And Seer Obscura short-circuits for a second before they reply. Its pretty evident they become flustered when he does it, but Morgan is a patient man— he’ll wait with a warm smile as Seer Obscura comes up with an answer, short as it may be.

• I drew it the first time I ever posted abt the two, but I’m big on the hc that seers wear glasses from the strain that the sight causes to their eyes. Morgan’s isn’t great, but it isn’t nearly as bad as Seer Obscura’s. Theirs is so bad from how long they avoided using their powers. The two do the classic “Lets swap glasses to see what your vision is like!” And Morgan almost stumbles from how strong their prescription is. Seer Obscura squints so hard they might as well have their eyes closed from trying to focus on the blurry blob that Morgan’s face becomes from how weak his prescription is in comparison. After switching back, the two sit for a while to quell the small headaches that the vision change gives them LOL

• we don’t quite know the specifics of Seer Obscura’s past with masquerading as an illusory. We don’t know if they even had a job that related to that magic type, but I like to think they’re really good at interior decorating because of it. They can visualize what a room will look like if they moved the furniture around, the paint on the walls, if the flooring was tile instead of wood. Morgan tells them he’s planning on moving his couch to a different spot in the living room and Seer Obscura asks if he would like to know what it would look like before he does. They show him a few different options before he settles on one.

• The first time they hang out outside of The Sodality office (and outside of their respective apartments) is at a thrift store! Seer Obscura is big on thrifting clothing specifically and Morgan indulges them until he finds a million little trinkets he wants to bring home. He’s more excited to accompany them after the first time because of it.

• As a couple, Morgan is a sucker for any and all types of kisses but especially on the forehead or temple whenever he’s giving them. Seer Obscura’s favorite places to kiss are the beauty marks on his face but especially the ones on his neck. Turns him into a puddle everytime they do it.

• Seer Obscura loves tattoos but is so noncommittal about them that they use their illusory abilities to create them. Some on their fingers one day, a full sleeve on their arm another day, etc. etc. One day they use their powers to color in Morgan’s black & white forearm tattoo and he spends the rest of the day grinning whenever he catches sight of it.

• Once they start living together, they greet each other with a kiss and pushing their foreheads together. They don’t know when they picked up the habit, but it feels wrong not to once they become aware of it.

• Morgan loves lingering touches. A hand on the small of Seer Obscura’s back, thumb swiping over their bottom lip, a light kiss to their fingertips. The first time he cups their cheek in his hand and they lean into it, it takes every inch of his self control not to pounce on them for it.

• The two often have random bouts of insomnia. It isn’t very consistent, it’ll just happen for a week or two. Often times Seer Obscura will lay in bed the whole night but if it’s Morgan, he’ll carefully get out of bed to make sure he doesn’t wake them up. If they weren’t actually asleep, they’ll just follow him. But, if they were asleep, it doesn’t take them long to wake up anyway. They can feel when he isn’t there and they’ll get up to guide him back to bed by the hand or join him on the couch and fall asleep there. If they do go back to bed, Seer Obscura will run their fingers through his hair in an attempt to help him fall asleep but more often than not they end up asleep first lolol

• Morgan is a romantic at heart. He’ll often go through old text messages with Seer Obscura to watch as they slowly warm to him more and more. A longer than one word response turns into a small paragraph then into random messages about their day, what they ate, a picture they took of his cat. His lockscreen is a picture he took when they were asleep in his arms one morning. They think it’s a little embarrassing but it brings a smile to his face whenever he sees it.

• god they are so sickly sweet. They slow dance in the kitchen while Seer Obscura cooks type of sweet.

• puppy dog eyes from Seer Obscura. All of the time. THEY DON’T EVEN REALIZE THEY DO IT and if Morgan or anyone else tries to mention it they vehemently deny it

• Morgan has a few fidget rings. He likes to wear them on his index finger. Seer Obscura will hold his hand just to play with them.

• Seer Obscura will hum to nothing and bob their head to the tune when it’s extra quiet. They don’t realize they’re doing it until Morgan points it out.

“You seem awfully chipper today.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve been humming for five minutes.”

“…oh.”

• Whenever they play a co-op game in which their characters can get married it is all Morgan is focused on. Stardew Valley? Married. It was one of the first things he wanted to get done once they were able to. When they play Minecraft, they create a modpack and he specifically requests a mod that will allow them to get married.

“We don’t have to be married to just live in the same house. Like— we can just do that normally.”

“Don’t care, I want to put a Minecraft ring on your Minecraft finger.”

“…You’re ridiculous.”

“I love you too!”

• When they first become official, the entire Sodality office knows something is up because Morgan is glowing. His smile is so bright its blinding. They almost have to squint at how sunshiney he becomes when Seer Obscura walks in because Morgan is as happy as a clam.

• Morgan gets him and Seer Obscura matching chains for their glasses on their first valentine’s day together. He’ll wear it whenever he’s being active, like working out or something but Seer Obscura wears it all the time.

#morgan kyne #seer obscura #redacted morgan kyne #redacted morgan #redacted seer obscura #redactedverse #redacted audio #redacted audio headcanons #orchid.txt #:((((( FROWNS DEEPLY I LOVE THEM SO BAD #no proofreading we die like men #well very minimal proofreading #redacted asmr #manifesting morgan’s return… sooner rather than later

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queerophenia · 16 days ago

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Roger Daltrey Myers-Briggs analysis

Keith's analysis John's analysis Pete's analysis

Roger Daltrey: The Executive (ESTJ-A)

I was gonna make a post of all four but Roger's alone ended up being SO LONG that I've decided to make a dedicated post for each member. I'm not gonna go in order of Roger, Pete, John, Keith bc EVERYTIME I do that I always get burned out before Keith. Pete's going last bc he's my favorite and that'll keep me going.

Not a lot of people are gonna read this probably but anyway I should just say to those that do, take this with a grain of salt. Myers-Briggs is about as scientific and scholarly as zodiac signs. This is just for fun.

Energy: Extrovert (E)

-I think Roger's just very obviously an extrovert. This is kinda the least important letter to me because I also feel like people being introverts or extroverts is bullshit. We all crave connection, we all crave alone time. You're not one or the other. We’re not black and white (big problem with myers-briggs). There's nothing scientific about some people recharging alone and some recharging around others. I usually just figure out the other letters and then go with the Energy type that's more accurate to the person.

-Roger's outspoken, charming, sociable, and a natural performer. I don't need to fight to prove I'm right.

“I loved the buzz of the audience. The adrenaline, the roar. That moment when you walk out and it’s like stepping into fire—but good fire.”

Mind: Observant (S)

-Mind describes what people are more likely to do with the information gathered from the world around them, and also how they interpret it. Intuitives live in their head, in the past, in the future, in the clouds, and in their imagination. Sensors live in the here and now, on Earth. Roger definitely lives in the here and now.

-“I remember the taste of the cold metal on the mic, the weight of it, the sting when I missed the swing and clocked myself in the teeth.” (Instead of philosophizing, Roger gives us sensory-rich snapshots. His memory is tactile, image-based, grounded in the body. That’s signature Sensing. There’s no spiraling into “what if”—just “what was")

-“My form teacher for my last three years of primary school was called Mr. Blake, and I loved him almost as much as I loved that flannel shirt. He taught me about history and geography and all the things I was interested in. He took us on school trips and we did interesting stuff with him. We learned naturally, which is the best way. And he thought I had potential. “A boy of wide interests—practical, intellectual, musical and athletic,” he wrote in my end-of-year report in 1955. Maybe I could have been a nuclear physicist, too.” (history and geography seem in line for subjects Sensors would like. History is just history. It’s concrete. Geography is also concrete. It’s just there)

-“I’m quick to see a path through a problem once I’ve focused on it. If I get too scrambled, my brain goes haywire, but once you get me to focus on something I’m absolutely 100 percent driven. Pete could be all over the place. His default position was scrambled. I suppose I was the ground for his sky. Sky is great but you need the ground, too.”

“By 1966, [Pete] was really beginning to write his own songs and they were… different. [...] Whatever we did next, we’d still get on Top of the Pops. So Pete wrote “I’m a Boy.” Bloody hell. A song that was supposed to be part of a rock opera called Quads about a future where parents can choose the sex of their children. A couple have three girls but the fourth child is a boy. The mother isn’t happy. So she brings him up as a girl. He questions his gender identity. It was, like so much of Pete’s music, way, way ahead of its time. I found this very, very difficult. I was all right with the line “My name is Bill and I’m a head case” but the rest of it, a boy struggling to find his identity, was hard.” (this is also evidence for Pete being an Intuitive btw) (also Roger saying "bloody hell" to Pete's abstract song ideas)

-“I offered to try to write [Lifehouse] into a proper script but this proved insurmountably difficult. I understood what [Pete] was trying to say. When we find the meaning of everything, when you find a higher being, it will be a musical note. I got that. But how do you make a film of that? How do you make a film of something that isn’t there?” (Roger was confused by Lifehouse because the idea wasn't tangible or concrete).

-“Pete got irritated if the audience wasn’t right. If it was full of record execs or the same people from yesterday’s front row or whatever, I never cared. I play to the back of the room. I see a mass of faces and that’s it. I don’t care. [...] The point is, it’s not a tangible thing you can produce by interacting with the audience. When you get it right, you know it.”

-“Ken was having none of it. He said I was Tommy, full stop. I explained that I could handle a crowd from a stage (tangible, can be seen, you don't have to imagine it), but I didn’t have a clue about how to project on film (no tangible audience, requires imagination).”

Nature: Thinking (T)

-The Nature scale reveals the extent to which we value emotions or rationality more when making decision. Thinkers tend to rely more on logic when making decisions and Feelers make emotion-based decisions. This does not mean Thinkers are heartless, or smarter, they just tend to follow their head over than their heart.

-This one was tough. I think Roger's pretty evenly split between Thinking and Feeling but Thinking takes a slight edge with him. He's very in touch with his feelings, but he more often than not will make a decision based off what is more logical to him. Big, pivotal, and important decisions do not (usually) come from the heart with him. I do think his decision to pursue The Who rather than Jackie was feelings-based, we're not black and white. But he usually tries to be practical and objective. His reasoning is almost always rooted in what makes sense rather than how he feels.

-“All I was doing was bending the pipes that the electrical wires would go in. And I thought to myself, this isn’t electrical work. This is bloody plumbing. One of the things you don’t need to know when you’re making an electric guitar is how to bend bleeding pipes. Also, it was March. That fresh air was bloody freezing. Six weeks later, I walked out, went back to the employment agency, and asked for a different job. You could do that back then.”

-“If it had been up to me, we would have got rid of Kit and Chris sooner. We would have got rid of them the moment I knew for a fact they were ripping us off. I knew they were shifty for years but it’s different when you have conclusive proof that the two people who are supposed to be managing you are stealing from you. I got the conclusive proof not long after I’d come back from touring my solo album. Kit and Chris said, “We’ve got The Who a three-album deal with MCA and it’s a million dollars an album.” Great. “And your percentage of every album is $529,325.” Hang about. (Roger is so funny) Our percentage for the record contract was 60 percent. I knew that, no matter how often you run it through a calculator, $529,325 is not 60 percent of a million dollars. It was even more ridiculous than that. The figure ran all the way down to cents. I might be a Shepherd’s Bush boy but I’m not stupid. So I called them up and asked them to run through it again. They came up with the same number. I asked if they were sure and they said they were. So I called Ted Oldham, our lawyer, who confirmed the band was due 60 percent of a million dollars per album. My Shepherd’s Bush mathematics was correct. And he was quite clear. Kit and Chris were screwing us. I spoke to Keith and John and told them I didn’t want people I couldn’t trust handling my business anymore. It wasn’t about the money. [...] I always valued their creativity and how much they’d done for us. I just didn’t want them managing the band anymore. I wanted to break the management deal, bung them 10 percent, and keep them on for their creative value. I wanted them involved but I didn’t want drug addicts with their hands on the purse strings. Keith and John saw my reasoning, but Pete wasn’t interested. He wouldn’t sign the thing to get us out of the contract. I told him we had to do something about it. He said he didn’t want to and that was that. Who money was pocket money for him.” (side note - Pete's such a Feeler for this, caring more about his relationship with Kit and Chris and whatever shit he felt about his mentor-figure over the fact The Who were literally getting screwed over financially. Roger saw a logical solution).

-"In 1976 the rest of the band asked Bill to manage them. They’d watched Bill handle everything for me and they wanted him to do the same for them. I stayed out of that. I would have preferred to keep Bill all to myself. But I suppose it was inevitable. When everything came to a head, Bill was the obvious choice to manage The Who.” (Roger not letting "I want" dictate a decision.)

-The whole Kenney rigamorole: “In January 1979, Pete invited Kenney Jones to become our drummer. We all liked Kenney very much. He’d been a friend for years and he’s a great bloke. During the tours we did with him, I got on with him better than the rest of the band. He was also a great drummer. But he was completely the wrong drummer for us. [...] So I sat Kenney down and said, sorry, chum, I can’t go on with you playing drums. He didn’t say much. Who can blame him? It must have been hard not to take it personally. But it really wasn’t personal. You can’t be anything but ruthless to get a band to succeed. You can’t be mediocre. A band can be either terrible or brilliant. There is no middle ground. So you have to make tough decisions. I’d done it with Harry Wilson, my best friend, when we’d replaced him with Doug Sandom. I wanted to do it with Kenney. So we had a meeting, a summit, a reckoning in Bill Curbishley’s house in Chigwell. [...] There wasn’t any aggression on my part. I loved Kenney, but he was wrong for us. I knew it. I know Pete knew it. I knew Pete was kicking himself, but he couldn’t do the bad guy bit. So I just said what I needed to say. If you’ve got the wrong wheel on a car and you’re weaving all over the place, you have to change it."

tl;dr: Roger liked Kenney and adored him as a drummer, they were friends, but he knew he wasn't the right fit for The Who. It's completely authentic to a Thinker to just go yeah, this isn't working, sorry. Pete (who is definitely a Feeler), couldn't bring himself to get rid of Kenney, and followed his feelings to make a decision, vs Roger who followed what simply made sense to him.

-“You don’t get anywhere moaning. You do the work. You keep your word. The end.”

-“He kept his head when everyone else was losing theirs—even when his head was all but exploding from frustration.” — Who I Am

Tactics: Judging (J)

-From Myers-Briggs website: The Tactics scale, which includes the Judging and Prospecting personality traits, reflects how people plan and deal with the options they have. But this definition doesn’t just concern what individuals write in their day planners. It’s much broader. These traits answer questions like, “Do you prefer spontaneity or certainty?” “Do you feel more comfortable acting only with all your ducks lined neatly in a row? Or does a certain amount of flexibility or chaos excite you and prove motivating?” “Do you need more choices or fewer?” -Judgers like to know what's going on. They like to know (or lay) the path ahead rather than to deal with events as they come, and they value clarity and closure. This can sometimes make them come off as rigid and stubborn. It also makes them excellent leaders. This one is also tough for Roger, as he seems to have a foot in both. I think The Who made him very tolerant to chaos and uncertainty, and he's very chill with it. But it does seem that Roger operates in a Judging way, but he's malleable. He's pretty lax with doing whatever comes up, and doesn't mind changing plans, but he definitely makes structure where there isn't any, because he gravitates more toward that way of living.

-“Pete wanted to play a full blues set immediately. He was always impatient to try the next new thing. I wanted to do the blues, too, but I was also very aware that we couldn’t just change overnight. We had our audiences, built up painstakingly in all those long trips in clapped-out vans. They wanted to hear the hits. This was their Ready, Steady, Go. I knew we had to go slowly.” (this also supports Roger being a Thinker) (but anyway, my guy just makes plans as second nature)

-“It took me ten years to decorate Holmshurst. [...] We were there in rubber gloves and boiler suits, sweating our bollocks off. I loved almost every minute of it. It was a straightforward, repetitive job, the opposite of anything to do with The Who.”

-“I think that’s the key. I need to work. And I honestly believe that’s part of the reason why I’m still here today. [...] If I didn’t have a project during our downtimes, what else would I have done with my time?”

-"If you look back at all the pictures of the band, you’ll only ever find me in four sets of clothes. I haven’t changed. I’m still a really simple bloke that way."

-“The first gig, in Holland, went well, but somewhere between Holland and Denmark they picked up a sackful of purple hearts and that was it. The playing went out of the window. The tempo started getting faster and faster. There was no control. [...] Maybe it was a combination of the drugs they’d taken and the nerves, but the show was a mess. I tried desperately to get the lyrics in and the vocal loud enough, but they just played louder and faster. It was a cacophony and something had to give. A band of musicians with this much talent, and it was all getting flushed down the toilet. So I decided to flush something else down the toilet instead.” (Could be seen as spontaneous but I see it as The Who being his ultimate, most constant, most important thing in his life, and the drugs were a threat, and Judgers do not like threats to their plans, and they don't like disorder, of which the drugs were certainly causing musically).

-“For two days, I grieved. It was like a death. It was the end of everything. Five years slogging away, sacrificing everything, for nothing. And then, a couple of days after that, I pulled myself together and started making plans for a soul band. I called up old mates, planned a repertoire. [...] My future wouldn’t be with The Who, but I would be all right.” (Roger gets morose out of getting kicked out but I'd say he was also very rattled and effected by his life plan getting derailed. But he immediately begins marking the new path ahead because that's the way he's most comfortable living).

Identity: Assertive (-A)

-From the website: Assertive individuals aim for goals and want successful results, but they typically won’t let nervousness color the path to their accomplishments. They’re unlikely to spend a lot of time thinking about their past actions or choices. According to Assertive personality types, what’s done is done.

-This one doesn't seem like it needs explaining, so I'll keep it brief. It's just so obvious. Roger is such an A-type it's absurd.

-“In September 1965, I was still a confident singer. I knew my voice was having an effect on the audience.”

-“It was all about adolescent insecurities. It wasn’t really my thing. I just never had to fight for a girl. I’ve already told you, that’s one of the great things about getting up onstage with a microphone. It just happens that girls like it and if you’re nineteen, twenty years old, it’s not a bad thing to happen. It meant that I really wasn’t tuned in to insecurity the way Pete was. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t insecure. Deep down, I was just as insecure as everyone else. I could be a front man onstage before thousands of people. I could hold my own with anyone. I could present the image of a rock star. But I wasn’t confident about myself.” (Roger is insecure (we're not black and white) but A-types see little purpose in entertaining the same grievances over and over. They just move on. They dgaf).

-“I’m not sorry I did what I did. I took the chance and went for what turned out to be the right thing. Once I’d made the decision, it just made sense. I knew I could do better, and that, when I did, I could take care of Jackie and Simon. I could provide better for them. And I did. As soon as I could, I looked after them. From the 1970s, we all used to go on holidays together every spring. Her family. My family. Old wounds healed and we all had a better life. This life—the one-room council flat, the job in the factory, the nights out gigging—this was no life. More importantly, if I hadn’t walked out, The Who would never have been, not with me in it anyway. The world would have been full of Townshend solo albums.” (what's done is done fr) (this is also very Judging of him)

-Reprise: "You can’t be anything but ruthless to get a band to succeed. You can’t be mediocre. A band can be either terrible or brilliant. There is no middle ground. So you have to make tough decisions."

-"It no longer felt like make-or-break because I would just carry on, like I always had. I wasn’t going back to the factory."

-His lyrical contribution to Anyway, Anyhow, Anywhere: "Nothing gets in my way, not even locked doors I don't follow the lines that've been laid before"

-"Roger was always tough... assertive, masculine."

-“Roger ruled The Detours with a characteristically iron hand.”

#the who #roger daltrey #pete townshend #mbti #i'm an mbti nerd and i simultaneously don't believe in it at all #which i don't think you're supposed to #long post #i got carried away #i’m doing keith next #keith and john are gonna be so hard bc they don’t have autobiographies

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heeseung-min · 2 years ago

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[17:53]

Part 2 from [11:44]

I saw some of you wanted part 2 for this so here you are😁 hope you guys enjoy

"What do you mean there was only one body?! Two of my friends live here!!"

Beomgyu angrily said to the police officer. Soobin also tried to hold himself from yelling because frustrated. When they saw a news of murdering happened on your neighbourhood this morning, both of them rushed to your place only to find Karina's dead body outside the house while you were missing.

"I know you are frustrated right now but we also trying our best here to find Miss Y/n. The neighbours also told us they didn't hear anything."

"Bullshit. How can they can't hear their screaming?"

Before Beomgyu can continue more, the police stopped him and went to do something else. Soobin reassured him.

"I'm sure Y/n is still alive. She will not give up easily. Let's try to find her, gyu. Waiting for the police officer is just wasteful."

-----

"You're going to act like this?"

Jungwon scoffed when he didn't get any answer from you. It's been a week since you got abducted and you've been so stubborn to them. Everytime they bring you food, you will either throw it away or left it untouched. Tired of your rage, Riki decided to tie your feet and hands so you can't throw the food away anymore.

You can feel your body become weak. Sometimes, you also feel lightheaded and thirsty so much. But, you don't want to give in.

"Let me go. I don't want to be here."

"We can't do that."

"I DON'T WANT TO BE IN HERE! LET ME GO YOU SICK FUCK! I WILL MAKE SURE BOTH OF YOU GET SEND TO JAIL!!"

Riki entered the room when he heard you screamed. To be honest, having Jungwon alone with you is better than Riki. At least Jungwon is not too rough with you rather than Riki.

You quickly backed away to the headboard when he came closer. Now, the braveness inside you just now completely vanished.

He didn't bring anything that can harm you. Instead of that, he went closer and sit near you and whispered to your ear.

"I have your parents address. Unless you want to see them here bloody dying, you can continue that."

That sure brought you to accept the fate. You can't do anything with your state right now. Riki took the bowl and spoon-feed you until it's finished and gave you water that you've been needing it for few days.

"See, you become a good girl. We will treat you better. If you want to be brat, you will face the consequence. Listen to us, okay? This is your home from now."

You nodded without saying anything. Afraid you will let out some words that will bring consequence. You waited for both of them to go out before trying to calm yourself from the panic attack you had just now.

________

"Are you really sure you asked all the neighbours? It is very impossible for them to not hear our friends screaming for help."

"Listen here, boy. How are you so sure they screamed that night? Probably your friend got killed first before she can even ask for help."

"BULLSHIT. HOW DARE YOU?"

Beomgyu punched the officer to the floor. Before he could do the second punch, he was pulled by Soobin and another officer.

"If you continue doing this, we will have no choice but to arrest you."

"You guys literally doing nothing to save my friend! Y/n is still alive!!"

"Let's go Beomgyu. There's nothing good being here. Let's find Y/n by ourselves."

That's what Soobin said before pulling Beomgyu out of the police station.

Both of Soobin and Beomgyu continue searching around your house area in case there is some evidence left or missed by the police. Soobin sighed frustratingly not finding anything after an hour. He stretched his body and moved around his neck until he caught something. Someone was staring straight to your house and quickly pulled the curtain when he noticed Soobin caught him.

"Beomgyu!"

"What?"

"I think we can get some information from the neighbour."

Beomgyu turned his head to look at Soobin who was staring at the upper floor of the next house.

Knock! Knock!

Both of the men watched a woman opened the door. She's quite old and looked very sweet as she smiled to them.

"May I help you, young men?"

"We want to ask about our friends which was your neighbour. Were you in the house at Wednesday ago?"

"I'm sorry but I was at my hometown. I'm sorry about your friends. They were so kind to me."

Her expression relaxed but Soobin noticed her smile now more to force. She must be hiding something. So, he wanted to try something.

"I heard from the police that the murderer might be two people. Is that true?"

"Oh! yes yes! There were two. I heard that too from other neighbours."

Bingo.

"You are lying."

Now, the smile on her face has changed to shocked. Beomgyu and Soobin sighed before questioning her again.

"Police didn't say anything yet about the murderer but you knew there were two person that night?"

"I- I was not.."

"Please help us find our friend. We will make sure to keep you safe if you help us."

The woman felt guilty when both of them started to begging her. She can see how frustrated and angry they were on their eyes. But, she closed her eyes and sighed before opening again. The guilt in the eyes were gone and replaced by the selfishness. She pushed the boys out of her house.

"Don't come here again and bother me. If you do it again, I will call the police."

Soobin and Beomgyu couldn't believe what just happened. When they thought they finally get some help, it just ruined suddenly. They went back to your house to continue searching. When they got back to their car, Soobin noticed a paper stuck at the windshield.

I'm sorry for my mom's attitude. She did that because she was scared. That night, only one girl got murdered and the other one got kidnapped by two persons. I didn't see the face since both of them wearing a mask. Hopefully this can help you to find your friend.

-Sunoo-

****

"Aren't you afraid of getting caught by the police?"

You asked Riki as he tighten the rope around your wrists. You winced when you felt hurt because of the tightness. Jungwon was going out to do some errands so Riki will be the one who took care of you.

"Afraid? Huh, do you think the police will find us, Y/n? After all, no one go out the night you were screaming aloud asking for help." Riki said as he smirked to you as a mock. You were clenching your fists trying to suppress the anger inside you.

It's been nearly three weeks or a month? You also didn't remember it and were slowly losing hope to run from them. The thought of the neighbours didn't help during the police interrogation scared you to death. You didn't want to spend whole life with these creeps.

"But, why me? What do I have that both of you decided to do this?"

Riki sat beside you and caressed your hair gently before he whispered something that made you felt creepy.

"Because we are curious how would you look when you are broken and helpless."

"FUCK YOU!!!"

You kicked hard at his left thigh and tried to throw the small vase on the nightstand towards him. The vase did break and you can see blood coming out frok Riki's head.

"You bitch!! Argh fuck get over here!!"

Riki didn't move for a while because he's busy holding the pain on his thigh and his head. The vase made his head hurt and you took that chance and started to run from the room with the sharp piece of the broken vase.

"You can run Y/n. Make sure I don't caught you cause you don't want to face the consequence."

What Riki said made your adrenaline rush and your speed on running increasing. You don't know which way to go cause you never get out and get familiar with the place so you just ran fast to get far away from Riki. You knew how bad it will be if you get caught and you don't want that to happen.

You keep running until you saw a road few metres in front of you. You started to lose your breath from the running. Your throat is dry and desperate water but you can't give up. Not when you finally can be free. You were happy when you saw a car from far. You decided to raise your hand as a signal for the driver to stop.

However, just when the car got near, someone grabbed you from behind.

----

AHAHAHAH HOW'S THAT🤣🤣🤣 i bet you all frust at the end right

Taglist: @stacey-stonem @duolingofanaccount @lamoons @obsessed1with1straykids @huggyuvita @marylalala @enha-stan

I tagged those who wants part 2 of this but some account cant be tagged idk why tumblr is so dumb so hopefully you guys enjoy this

#yandere enhypen #yandere kpop #kpop yandere #enha x reader #kim sunoo #lee heeseung #park jongseong #park sunghoon #sim jaeyun #yang jungwon #nishimura riki #yandere au #yandere jungwon #yandere nishimura riki #yandere drabble #yandere #yandere enha #enha imagines #enha scenarios

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good7luck · 2 months ago

Text

my personal TMI dumping

some descriptive, stressful details of my real life timeline as an incest CSA survivor

trigger warning: sexual crimes between full bio siblings, irresponsible full bio parents that protect the sex offender (their older adult son) more than the victim (their younger underage daughter), my negative feelings

This is almost my first time to write something like this, and I'm sorry in advance if some words are too unnecessary or inappropriate ^^;

(more under the cut)

All my family members are fully blood-related. No adoption, no cheating, nothing "special".

I and my older brother shared little to no hobby or preference, especially with the 5+ years age gap and different genders. We barely interacted with each other, had little to no interest in each other, even before the incest CSA. We were neither "sweet" siblings nor "fighting" siblings. I'd say, it was close to a superficial, mandatory business relationship, perhaps.

My brother had held some inferiority complex about me, his little sister, who is 5+ years younger than him, though. He had complained that our parents love and care about me and only me, and he still insists so even now, after all his own incest sexual crimes.

When I was 14 years old, a middle schooler minor,

my 5+ years older brother, a college student adult, sneaked into my bedroom and groped my breast for a while, which half waked me up. I was frozen in horror, and he didn't notice I was awake. When he stopped and got out of my room, it was 3-4 AM.

I was so shocked that there existed a trashy pervert criminal in my own bio family. I wasn't 100% sure if it's my brother or father at that time, but part of me knew it's probably my brother. Unfortunately, I couldn't think of calling my mother right away.

On the same day, maybe after the school, I forced myself and finally told her at home. My mother didn't believe me. She first said maybe I mistook my father trying to cover me with my blanket. I was so dumbfounded that I failed to explain more. She then chuckled and said maybe I had a sexual dream, cuz I hit puberty. I despaired completely.

I couldn't think of trying to tell my father next instead, when even my mother of the same gender as mine didn't believe her own bio daughter. I irrationally thought I should try to catch the criminal at the scene by myself if it happens again. I wasn't able to think I should just lock the door of my room from then on, especially when both my parents had never approved of it.

My brother came again and grabbed both breasts of mine harder several nights more after his "success" without any "consequence", and everytime I failed to do anything meaningful against him. Somehow, from some point, it never occurred again, at least I thought so.

When I was 17 years old, a high schooler minor,

I accidentally found some inappropriate photos of my body parts in a folder on my brother's computer. They were all taken while I was sleeping, mostly at night and some at daytime as well. I had never noticed my brother had even taken photos of me at all. It turned out he had sexually abused me more times than I had noticed he did. "Anyway", I was so "happy" to finally find the solid evidences of my brother's sexual assaults on me at least now. I was surprised but not too surprised at newly revealed his extra crimes on his underage sister. I had been mentally broken that much.

After a few days, when I was ready-not-ready, I made my mother see the obnoxious photos of me on my brother's computer herself when he wasn't around. She had no choice but to believe my words, and she finally let my father know about my brother's crimes, including the photos.

One or two days later, my father had a talk with my brother outside for hours, while I and my mother were staying at home. With this, I believed all my lonely suffering days would finally come to an end. I trusted that my parents would deal with my brother "somehow" and that I would get some proper apology from everyone else and finally be free from all the mess "anyway" at last. I thought so, at least. I was way too naive.

After my father and brother came back, we all gathered for dinner. My parents forced me to apologize to my brother, before he apologized "back" to me by my parents' demand. I, the one-sided underage victim, was yelled and pressured to say sorry to the serious sex offender adult, even first. My parents didn't specify any of his sexual crimes. They pretended I, "too", had been "somehow wrong" to him, and so "both" should "equally" apologize to each other, for having been a "somehow disrespectful" sibling to the other.

It turned out my parents were "worried" my brother's "self-esteem" would get hurt too much as an older brother, when "they know" he's "in fact" a good person, and it's all porn's fault, my mother said. I lost my words at the ridiculous "logic" and apologia.

The incest adult-on-child SA crimes of years all awkwardly got "wrapped up" just like that, on that one single day. None of my parents apologized to their underage daughter for their horrible adult son or their own parental responsibilities. My selfish brother didn't do anything to make atonement for his sins. No one in my "family" cared about my self-esteem or what I felt or needed, before and after.

I had to keep living and eating together with my brother in the same house just like before. My parents still never stopped trying to put us "siblings" together, in the name of "family to depend on". No one had ever brought up any of the incest CSA since that one single day, as if nothing happened. I had never gotten any kind of real support from my parents at all. I guess they believed I must be "okay" cuz I looked "silent and calm", which was mostly because of too much exhaustion and frustration.

When I was 20 years old, a college student adult,

the insane brother bastard entered my room again and squeezed both my breasts tightly again, which half waked me up. Our eyes met in the darkness, and he pathetically ran away to his room in hurry.

I was obviously so angry and upset that the shameless scum did it again and that my parents definitely failed me. But I also felt so helpless and depressed cuz I already, naturally didn't have much hope from my thoughtless parents, based on the whole "family" history.

In the morning, my brother quickly got out of home, and I told my mother that the shit happened again. She got mad and told his father. They had a talk with my brother without me. Then we all gathered for dinner. My parents made my brother apologize to me. He mumbled it's not like he loves me "that way", and he briefly said sorry.

I didn't say a word, didn't do anything to him, didn't demand anything from him, which I painfully regret so, so much now, and possibly forever. I had been way too tired and wrecked for years, I simply wished it would all just end asap. I was still too naive at that time.

This time, my parents didn't make up an excuse to force me to apologize. The new incest SA crime got roughly "wrapped up".

Next day in the morning, I woke up in a bad mood for obvious reasons. My mother was smiling in the kitchen, which already gave me a bad vibe. She asked me why I looked so unhappy, as if there's no reason, as if nothing happened right yesterday. I raised my voice a little and told her how I could be happy when the brother violated my body. She stopped for a while and then said, as if she's "reasoning" with me, that my brother is still her child like I am, and so she, the mother, has no choice but to embrace him "no matter what", even in case he commits a murder. I was utter speechless and just left the scene.

It turned out this time my father was originally going to get my brother out of the house to separate him from me, but my mother objected to it, because it's "too much" and "too harsh" for my brother.

Anyway, I was officially allowed to lock my door when sleeping. The shitty creep has never sneaked into my room at night, perhaps.

There are a lot of details that are not included above.

There have been many things that happened for years since then.

In recent years, unfortunately,

my brother in his 30s has shown various indirect signs that he regrets not hiding the evidence photo files "better", that he regrets admitting his crime "too soon". He has quietly but certainly developed stronger misogyny, victim mentality, bigotry, and even violence etc. I realized all this and connected the dots only very recently, which makes me feel so stupid and miserable. I'm still in danger, just in different and potentially worse forms.

Both my parents don't see a huge problem from my brother, even after clearly witnessing his aggressive attitudes and threatening words and actions towards me in front of them a few times. They never tried to defend me or stop him at the scene, which still makes me badly scared and disappointed. My mother rather scolded me that I shouldn't "carelessly provoke" my brother, or I might actually get hit physically by him.

Also, from last year, my brother suddenly started to mention, "Since when were you a good girl? You are not good-hearted.", out of context, when he gets offended and verbally attacks me. My parents never denied his words for my sake at the moment or even later, unlike they always do for my bother, who easily sulks and calls himself bad in sarcasm.

Of course, all the incest CSA and SA are "forgotten" in my "family". No one cares that I'm a huge victim woman of multiple sexual crimes when they speak. Meanwhile, my brother is their "kind and reliable" son who listens to the parents well and gives them a drive to a hospital or whatever help when needed. I'm often just a powerless easy target to blame and put down. I feel it's all too late, again.

I deeply regret not taking any legal or effective action against my unashamed brother. I heavily regret not forming or leaving any clear evidence of his sexual crimes on me in any form. I mean, my parents are the only real witnesses, but would they speak up for me? What if both pass away, and my heinous brother insists I make false accusations against him and spread lies to people, and even sues me? I've been so dumb, I might be doomed. Even if it's not the case, I'm not sure if I would be able to protect myself properly, from any harm, to be honest. I sincerely regret not doing my best in the past to actively take care of myself and save my future.

I'm no longer a college student. I'm aware I should get a good job and move out and escape from the terrible jerks asap, at the very least. I wish I already did, as I had always wished. But I keep failing, failing to prepare, failing to rest, failing to manage my everyday life. I've become very dysfunctional on so many levels. It feels like, only my clock is getting slower, and I'm being left behind alone further, as if I'm on the hands of death, like some magnet.

Despite everything in my life, I have never ever physically harmed myself at all, and hopefully I never will. I don't want to die or get killed or wounded anytime soon, much less before my damned older brother does. My death or injury would only benefit the dirty criminal, and I absolutely refuse that. I want to live long and healthy enough to see the ugly scumbag disappear from this world, as a proud adult survivor.

This became like 3 times longer than I first thought asdfghjkl Some parts may sound whiny and childish haha I'd like to avoid changing anything big after I publish this post, but I might if necessary ^^;

Thank you very much for kindly, patiently reading my unhappy experiences and complicated thoughts! I hope you have a peaceful day/night!!

#good7luck talk #good7luck personal #incest survivor #csa survivor #sa survivor #incest csa survivor

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ultimatebottom69 · 8 months ago

Note

Why do you like HS more than HSR? That's pretty interesting knowing most rc players dont really like Vicky and the story. And what do you think about Vicky and Lane as a MC? Which one do you like better and why? I saw the majority of readers liking Lane more because how smart and introspective she is, meanwhile you think she's no different than Vicky. Why?

Yeah I like HS more. I didn't know most players prefered Lane from Vicky tbh. Not many people like Vicky to start with due to her stupidity (That I find funny) so I just assumed the ratio was rather equal. As an MC i prefer Selena from Arcanum over these two.

I like Vicky simply because she makes me laugh. I don't want a relatable MC. This gal is not relatable at all in any capacity. I mean I don't wear dresses. I just like to see her reactions to every problem is just the worse solution everytime. Girl got an Art degree and is saving the multiverse people this is absolutely hilarious.

Lane and her both got the depression squad on lock (HS2 Vicky I mean on Composure path) , both are fashionnistas and both are kind of the choosen ones which is normal they are MC's. Lane monologue really brings the story alive in HSR because without it. Well...Yeah. Vicky has barley any thoughts but that's because HS1 and HS2 are dialogue focused instead of storytelling through the MC's eyes.

Vicky gets chased by every men for no reason ? Well sorry to burst some bubbles but Lane does get chased by every man in the story too. It's a romance story. It is super evident when you don't interact with Cain and Dmitry you talk to them almost 24/7 even if you try to have an hostile relationship meanwhile i gotta fight to even talk to Anna and Mimi respectively.

But again i am an F/F player so the personality of both MC's aren't even as horny as everyone complaining about. Feels chill which doesn't bother me as an asexual gal.

Vicky starts to be clingy towards Mimi in HS2, which is reciprocated. They genuinely feel like a couple going through some real bullshit together, in HS1 friends with benefits who slowly realises they are gay for each others. (My shock is how chill Vicky is with Mimi's former crush on Lucifer and how it's never adressed again. 10/10) Bisexual representation babyyyyy. The Bar was in sub-hell and we flew above.

And for HSR the romance route with Anna does not feel like a romance at all since Lane keeps going on and on on her lack of understanding to her attraction to women. Which kills me because bitch it's season 2.

Meanwhile Vicky got over it...fast as fuck. Like so fast it is a tad incredible. No internalized homophobia or anything girl went "I guess I love her."

The true problem with HSR is not only the female LI is sidelined which is fine by the way i am used to it. But I am not getting attached to any of the characters at all despite trying. Yeah Noah is cool but. He had 2 interactions with Lane, 3 actually. After 2 seasons. Kira except for her stabbing attempt do not talk at all to Lane unless you initiate the contact and even that it's super short. The Tatoo guy says his backstories and that's it. Greg. Is Greg. Cain is...Mysterious but in a "I hate talking to people" way not in a sexy way or entertaining. I don't get what the fuck he is doing 3/4 of the time except his job. Pigeon. And the angel gal are just here for plot exposure. Dmitry gets very boring very quickly if it's friendship. The story lacks "interactions"

In HS. Even if you don't interact with the characters, they talk to each others. A lot. I can tell you right now the statut of each and every relationship in HS. Yes even Austie and Leelo. The two bitches we saw like 5 times total I can tell you, Austie is "friends" with Mimi, Sex Friends with Lucifer, Ennemy of Vicky (one-sided as fuck) , Ennemy of Rebecca, Situationship with her dad.

Leelo, Favorite student of Fencio, Crush on Dino (One sided), Ennemy of Vicky (One sided). I think she has the worse relationships with her parents due to her speech beforr her death.

And mind you I didn't care about Leelo at all but I managed to analyze with the dialogues where she stood in the story.

Now let's do that with HSR. Shall we ?

Kira, Relationships : Noah colleague (No interaction), Pileon Suspecious Colleague, Anthea (No interaction) , Tatoo Guy (3 interactions) Colleague, Cain (No interaction), Dmitry Chef of the squad Absolutely a crush. Greg (No interaction) Colleague, Anna Colleague/Friend, Lane Colleague/Ennemy (one sided, Lane's monologue is not very clear about her stand ?)

See this shit ? This is a character that was introduced in episode 1. How comes ?? I could do the whole squad but this is how it looks mostly. Anna is the only one with friendly interactions and Lane is the one most hated generally.

So yes. HS is better then HSR. For that regard 100%. Now the plot points can be argued and talked upon, but for these regard I am not hearing anyone out.

#romance club #rc anna #rc kira #rc mimi #rc heaven's secret #rc heaven's secret 2 #rc heaven's secret requiem #rc lane

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connieluvsr · 2 years ago

Text

ONE OF THE GIRLS | part 3

pairing: (electric) guitarist!jungkook x singer!reader(f)

genre: band au, enemies to lovers, fluff, angst

summary: when your main guitarist gets sick and can't perform at your show, you get help from someone unexpected.

warnings: swearing and some making out, hot jk:)), drinking, mention of drugs, smoking, slight smut, angst, reader is complicated.

word count: 6.9k

a/n: FINALLY after 2 months of not posting. i swear i want too many things to happen in this series but still didn’t know what to write. im so sorry for you waiting that long, please enjoy this chapter!

__________

"Woo! Amazing!" Avery's claps echoed through the room as she leaped onto the plush leather couch, sending vibrations that jolted Zac into a celebratory dance.

The much-anticipated day of the show was drawing near, and we had been tirelessly rehearsing. Despite everyone's praises, I felt there was always room for improvement.

"I'm utterly drained. Let's call it a day," I declared, collapsing onto the couch next to Avery and Zac.

"Are you sure? You practically begged me for extra rehearsal hours," Jungkook teased, concern etched on his face.

"My throat feels like it's on fire, and my head is pounding," I confessed, my voice hoarse and tired.

Avery gently rubbed my back, suggesting, "Take some Strepsils; you'll be fine."

Zac stood up, nodding in agreement. "Should we head out?"

"Yeah, let's go," Avery chimed in, following Zac toward the door. "Bye, guys!"

As they left, we waved our goodbyes, and I closed my eyes, sinking back into the couch. Suddenly, I felt Jungkook's presence beside me.

"Are you okay?" he inquired, his voice laced with concern.

"Yeah, why?" I replied, meeting his gaze with weary eyes that threatened to shut at any moment.

He sighed, clearly sensing something was amiss. "I feel like you're not telling me something."

"Do I have to spill every detail of my life to you?" I snapped, my exhaustion making me unusually irritable.

He looked taken aback, his confusion evident. "No, I didn't mean—" Before he could finish his sentence, he stops. He looks at me with such sad eyes. "Get some sleep. Talk to me when your eyes aren't threatening to close on their own," he retorted, his words sharper than intended. He hesitated for a moment, as if wanting to say something more, but eventually, he stood up and silently closed the door behind him. I let out a heavy sigh and covered my eyes with my palms, hoping to find a moment of peace amidst the chaos.

He knew you’re not being yourself, you kept the distance a lot more these days since what happend with Ander, everyone noticed, including Avery, who wanted to hang out but you politely declined everytime with another made-up excuse. You don’t want to sing — you mean you can’t sing with someone else, It’s not … what you’re used with. You hate new, you want the ordinary, the basic you’ve been doing.

Jungkook’s an amazing singer, you know it and he knows it too, but everytime you step into the practice room, a knot tightened in my stomach, you know how much he wants to help you and you know how much you need him, so you let him, but deep down you think about Ander and how quick he left and you’ve got someone else.

His voice resonated with passion and talent, filling the room with melodies that should have comforted me. Instead, they only intensified my insecurity. I compared every note he sang to the echoes of Ander’s notes, the memory of our duets haunting me like a ghost.

Did Ander try to contact you? Well His messages were filled with empty apologies, excuses that felt like salt on my wounds. I blocked him on all platforms, so he sent pointless emails.

The clock says 04:55, I found myself tossing and turning in bed, unable to shake off the tension from earlier. Unable to bear the suffocating feeling inside, I quietly slipped out of my room, barely seeing anything, I put on one of my hoodies and leave the house in the hushed darkness of the night.

The cool night air brushed against my skin as I walked aimlessly, trying to clear my mind. The city was silent, so, so, silent.

It was cold outside, I was in some Hello Kitty PJ’s and a hoodie that barely makes me warm, but I keep walking until I don’t feel the cold anymore.

The sun will rise in about half an hour now.

You wanna wait for it, making sure you’ll see it clearly, you go to the park that’s some miles away.

Suddenly, a cute dog start following you, you crouch down to him to pet him and he start licking you, gross but cute. “Come!” You smile and lead him to a small bench.

“Brianna?”

You turn your head, pulling the hood of the hoodie off to see better and you can’t belive who’s here. At this fucking hour.

He looked as surprised to see me as I was to see him. "What are you doing here?" he asked, his tone a mixture of concern and annoyance. He approaches me. “I knew I heard your voice. I thought- I thought I was crazy for a sec.” He looks up and down on me like he’s seen a ghost I wonder if I look okay, I didn’t bother to look in the mirror.

"I needed some fresh air," I replied, my voice cold, mirroring the chill in the night, trying not to make eye contact with him.

"Well, you should have stayed at home," he snapped back, his frustration apparent. "You can't just walk around in the middle of the night alone."

"I can do whatever I want," I shot back, my temper flaring, looking up at him. “I don't need you to tell me what to do." My attention goes back to the dog as he bites my finger in a playful way. Jungkook just stares at it looking down on me.

“Brianna, I want to understand-“

In the midst of our vulnerable embrace, a sudden surge of frustration and anger overwhelmed me. You get up, he takes 2 steps back. “You think you can just swoop in and fix everything?" I snapped, pushing Jungkook away. "You don't know what I've been through. You don't understand."

Jungkook's eyes narrowed, his own temper flaring. "Maybe I don't, but that doesn't mean I don't care. I hate seeing you like this, shutting everyone out, including me." He points to himself and talks in an exhausted way.

I scoffed bitterly, a bitter laugh escaping my lips. "And what? You think you can change that? You think your concern will magically solve all my problems?"

He clenched his fists, his jaw set in determination. "No, I don't think it will magically solve everything. But at least you won't have to face it alone. We're friends, aren't we? Friends support each other."

"Friends?" I scoffed again, the word tasting like ash in my mouth. "Friends wouldn't fight all the time. Friends wouldn't constantly push each other's buttons."

Jungkook's expression softened, hurt flickering in his eyes. "Maybe we're more than just friends," he said, his voice surprisingly gentle. "Maybe I care about you more than I'm willing to admit."

His words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of unspoken emotions. I felt a pang of guilt, realizing that my anger had overshadowed his genuine concern. "I don't know what I want," I confessed, my voice breaking. "I'm scared of messing things up, of losing the people I care about. Again.”

Jungkook stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently cup my cheek. "You don't have to have all the answers right now," he said softly. "Just know that I'm here for you, no matter what. We can figure it out together."

In that moment, the fight within me crumbled, replaced by a flood of emotions. I let out a shaky breath, feeling the weight of my fears lifting, if only a little. Jungkook pulled me into a comforting hug, and for the first time that night, I felt a glimmer of hope.

We stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, the night around us slowly coming to life. In that moment, I realized that maybe, just maybe, I didn't have to face everything alone. Perhaps, with Jungkook by my side, I could find the strength to confront my fears and conquer the challenges ahead.

As we stood there, embracing each other under the moonlit sky, I felt a sense of warmth and security wash over me. It was as if Jungkook's presence had cast away the shadows that had clouded my thoughts. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my racing heart.

"Thank you," I whispered, my voice catching in my throat. "I don't know what I would do without you."

Jungkook pulled back slightly, his hands cupping my face again as he looked into my eyes with sincerity. "You'll never have to find out," he said, his voice soft but resolute. "We're in this together, remember?"

A small smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I nodded, feeling a newfound sense of resolve. "Yeah, together," I echoed, realizing that I wasn't alone in my struggles anymore.

We continued our walk, no longer in silence but with a comfortable ease between us. We talked about our fears, dreams, and everything in between. With each word, the connection between us deepened, and I found solace in sharing my thoughts with someone who truly understood.

As the night turned into dawn, we returned home. The sun was beginning to rise, painting the sky with hues of pink and gold, signaling a new day and a fresh start.

He walked me home but before he could leave I stop him. “What were you doing alone at that hour? you didn’t tell me.”

Jungkook is silent for a moment before he starts “Thinking.”

“About?” You ask couriously.

“You.”

Before you could try to make him explain what the fuck was that he left.

“Rehearsal today at 4 ok?” he shots from the street.

You giggle and give him a thumbs up.

What the hell did just happen.

______

"You know, I think they make a great couple," Avery mused, her voice laced with a sense of certainty. She reached out, deftly taking the blunt from Zac's hand, her fingers brushing against his in a fleeting touch. Zac's gaze followed the movement, his expression a mix of annoyance and intrigue.

"Hm?" Zac responded, his curiosity piqued as he took in the mention of Jungkook and Bri.

Avery settled into his lap, the weight of her presence grounding him in the moment. She exhaled a puff of smoke, blowing it up. "Jungkook and Bri, don’t ya think?" Avery's words hung in the air, mingling with the faint aroma of mari*uana. Zac's eyes flicked towards Bri's image in his mind, then back to Avery. He hesitated, the smoke clouding his thoughts momentarily.

"Um, yeah, sure, but they don’t seem like they like each other or shit," Zac replied, his voice a low murmur as he tried to make sense of the situation. Avery's eyes met his, a playful glint dancing in them as she inched closer. Before she could take another puff, Zac leaned in, capturing her lips in a pressed kiss.

"I think they really like each other," Avery murmured against his lips, her words muffled yet sincere. Her fingers traced a thoughtful path along his jawline, her touch a gentle caress that seemed to ease the tension in his muscles. "I know Bri is afraid, I just know it, but JK? What would he be afraid of?" She furrowed her brows, deep in contemplation.

"Afraid of moving too fast and lose her?" Zac suggested, his voice barely audible, his thoughts unraveling like the tendrils of smoke surrounding them. He shrugged, the uncertainty evident in his gaze.

"God, you're really smart," Avery whispered, her lips brushing against his cheek in a tender peck. With a soft sigh, she slid off his lap, the absence of her warmth leaving a lingering sensation. Rising from the couch, she reached for her phone, her fingers gliding across the screen as she dialed a number.

____

Avery's eyes widened in disbelief, her excitement palpable as I recounted the bizarre events of the previous night, or was it technically today?

"I can't believe it! No way, you did what?" Avery exclaimed, her voice echoing with a mix of shock and exhilaration.

The weight of the situation pressed down on me, making my palms clammy as I buried my face in them. "I don't know, I feel so weird right now," I confessed, my words muffled against my hands. "I have a rehearsal with him in an hour."

Avery's eyes glinted with determination as she seized upon the moment, her excitement bubbling over. "You gotta ask him what was that!" she urged, her words rapid, punctuated by animated gestures. She jumped up and down on the sofa, the energy radiating from her contagious enthusiasm.

"I'm scared," I admitted, my voice barely audible as I grappled with the overwhelming vulnerability that threatened to consume me. "I'm scared to let someone into a place so important in my life again. Music means everything to me. I… I can't. I feel like I'm betraying someone."

Avery's eyes blazed with fiery determination, her frustration palpable as she unleashed her pent-up emotions. "Gosh, you're not betraying Ander! That fucker literally could've made you lose your show!"

I shook my head, my thoughts racing. "I'm… I'm not talking about him," I confessed, my voice quivering. "I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I can do this. I feel like I let him in too much. What if I lose him too? What if, on the day of the show, he'll say he won't come? What if—"

Before I could finish my sentence, Avery's hands shot out, shaking me and pinching me sharply. "Ouch!" I yelped, wincing from the sudden pain.

"You're like a crazy person talking right now," Avery retorted, her frustration palpable. She glared at me, her eyes fierce with determination. In a moment of impulse, I grabbed my phone and dialed Jungkook's number, my fingers trembling as I pressed the call button.

"Hi, it's me," I said, my voice catching in my throat. "Yeah, don't come today... No, don't. Bye."

Avery's jaw dropped, her eyes widening in disbelief. "What the hell was that, why?!" she screamed, her frustration boiling over. She pulled at her hair in exasperation, her voice tinged with desperation. "You're not thinking straight!! The show is in 3 days! Come on! Once this is over, you'll find someone else if you're so scared of falling for him."

"Falling? What do... You think I love him?" I stammered, my words trailing off as I tried to make sense of my own feelings.

"You definitely love each other," Avery stated matter-of-factly, her tone unwavering. "You're both two dumb fuckers. Call him to come to rehearsals, for god's sake, I'm out."

"W-wait, Avery!" I shouted, but she was already gone, her footsteps fading into the distance.

"Fuck, it even started raining!" she screamed from the porch, her words carried away by the wind as she drove away.

I sigh in frustration as I collapse onto the plush couch, my weary eyes scanning the ominous clouds looming outside the window. With a heavy heart, I receive a notification alert on my phone, urging me to stay indoors due to an impending danger and an imminent rainstorm. The familiar sense of dread washes over me, and I can't help but mutter a resigned exclamation under my breath, "God... not again."

I pull the notification bar down, revealing a series of alerts detailing the severity of the situation. Flash flood warnings, gusty winds, and potential power outages are mentioned, intensifying my sense of unease. With a deep breath, I rise from the couch, my footsteps heavy as I move towards the window to get a better view of the darkening sky.

The atmosphere outside grows ominous, the clouds swirling in a chaotic dance, painting the sky with shades of deep gray. The wind starts to howl, rattling the windows as if nature itself is echoing my inner turmoil. I glance around the room, contemplating my options. The dimming light emphasizes the urgency of the situation, urging me to make a decision.

Taking a moment to gather my thoughts, I quickly assess the supplies in my home – candles, emergency rations, and a flashlight. I grab them, creating a makeshift emergency kit, hoping it will be enough to tide me over if the storm takes a turn for the worse. As I secure the windows and doors, I can't shake off the feeling of vulnerability, a reminder of the unpredictable nature of life.

I return to the couch, clutching the emergency kit tightly, and stare out of the window once more. Raindrops splatter against the glass, blurring the world into a surreal painting of water and shadows.

I make myself some hot coco and before the power is out, which will probably be by the night, I turn on the TV to watch Brooklyn 99 and put a nice comfy blanket.

My heart pounds in my chest, the echoes of the thunderstorm still reverberating through the air as I try to calm my racing thoughts. The glow from the TV screen illuminates the room, casting eerie shadows on the walls. Just as I start to regain a semblance of composure, the knocks on the door pierce the silence like a gunshot. I jump, my breath catching in my throat, and I shoot a fearful glance towards the entrance, my mind racing with possibilities.

"Fuck..." I mutter under my breath, hesitating before the door. I entertain the fleeting hope that whoever it is might just go away, but my hopes are dashed when another round of four loud knocks reverberates through the house, each one intensifying my anxiety. The situation feels surreal, the storm outside mirroring the turmoil within me.

My hands tremble as I reach for the doorknob, my heart pounding in my ears. Then, amidst the chaos of the storm, a familiar shout cuts through the air, calling my name. "BRI. IT’S ME… OPEN." The sound of his voice sends a mixture of relief and concern washing over me. Without a second thought, I throw the door open, my eyes widening in surprise at the sight before me.

There stands Jungkook, drenched from head to toe, his clothes clinging to him like a second skin. I try to push away the distracting thoughts about his perfect abs and body, focusing on the immediate concern. "Get in the house; you're shivering," I say urgently, my hand reaching out to pull him inside. His shivering intensifies, and I can't help but worry about his well-being.

"Fuck—let me get—"

"Bri."

"Let me get towels and clothes and—"

"Bri." He stops me, his eyes locking onto mine with a depth of concern that sends a shiver down my spine.

"I—" I start to protest, but his worry silences me. I nod, my determination to help him overpowering any embarrassment. "Let me grab you something. Please. I don't want you to be sick." I manage to tear my gaze away from his intense eyes and hurriedly make my way towards the closet, pretending not to notice his actions as he starts to undress behind me, though my cheeks burn with an undeniable awareness.

As I fumble through my closet, my hands search for something that might fit Jungkook. Finally, I pull out an oversized T-shirt and a pair of sweats that used to be snug on me when I was a bit chubbier. I hold my breath, hoping against hope that they'll fit him. I mutter a silent prayer under my breath, my fingers crossed as I bring the clothes to him.

"Here," I say, my voice a little shaky, trying my best not to meet his gaze directly, feeling the weight of his presence in the room.

"Thanks," he replies, his voice carrying a mix of gratitude and amusement as he accepts the towel and the clothes. After he dries himself, he starts to dress, and a soft laugh escapes his lips. "They're a bit... tight."

"I—yeah, I don't have anything else—" I stammer, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. My eyes dart away, not wanting to acknowledge the situation, even though his laughter is contagious.

"Bri," he says, his tone serious now, his laughter fading away. "I can't believe you told me I shouldn't come... I wanted to speak to you in person.”

His words hang heavily in the air, and I feel my heart skip a beat. I struggle to find the right words, my emotions in turmoil. "Jungkook... look, it's—" I start, my voice cracking with a mix of vulnerability and affection, wanting desperately to express what I feel but not sure how to articulate it.

"It's complicated," I finally manage to say, my voice barely audible over the distant rumble of thunder. I glance up, meeting Jungkook's eyes, searching for understanding. "I've been through so much, and I'm afraid... afraid of getting hurt again."

Jungkook's expression softens, his eyes reflecting empathy and sincerity. He takes a step closer, his hand reaching out to gently cup my cheek, his touch warm and reassuring. "Bri, I understand. I know it won't be easy, but I'm willing to try if you are. We can face the challenges together."

His words hang in the air, a silent promise that sparks a glimmer of hope within me. I find myself leaning into his touch, craving the comfort he offers. The storm outside mirrors the turbulence within my heart, but in this moment, Jungkook's presence provides a sense of calm amidst the chaos. “I thought we talked about this this morning. You were so committed-“

"I... I don't know. But all i know is i don’t want to lose you." I admit, my voice barely above a whisper, my eyes locked onto his. The vulnerability in his gaze resonates with my own fears and insecurities, creating a connection that goes beyond words.

He leans closer, and closer, and closer,

before I know, his lips meet me in a moment of sweet surrender, Jungkook's touch is gentle yet firm as he cups my face, his fingers warm against my skin. I close my eyes, savoring the softness of his lips, the taste of him like a bittersweet melody. His kiss is tender, a silent promise of affection and understanding.

A rush of emotions floods over me—desire, vulnerability, and a profound sense of connection. The air crackles with electricity, the charged atmosphere intensifying the intimacy of the moment. My fingers find their way into his soft hair, tangling in the strands as I pull him closer, deepening the kiss.

Jungkook responds with a soft sigh, his lips parting slightly, inviting me in. Our tongues meet in a slow, sensual dance, exploring each other with a hunger that transcends words. The kiss deepens, becoming a passionate exchange of emotions and desires, a silent conversation that speaks volumes.

I can feel the steady beat of Jungkook's heart against my chest, matching the rhythm of my own pulse. The world outside may be in chaos, but in this moment, there is only us—two souls intertwined in a kiss that feels like coming home. Time seems to stretch, the kiss becoming an eternity, a stolen moment of bliss that leaves us both breathless and wanting more.

When we finally pull away, our breaths mingling in the air.

In the dimness that followed the abrupt power outage, Jungkook's voice cut through the sudden silence, his words trailing off in the darkness. "I'm sorry if-" he began, but the sentence hung in the air, abruptly interrupted by the blackout.

A frustrated groan escaped my lips as I fumbled in the dark, desperately searching for my phone. "Fuck," I muttered, realizing the futility of the attempt.

“Bri, where are you?" Jungkook called out, his voice tense in the darkness.

My hands reached out, seeking his in the pitch-black void. "I'm looking for my phone. It should be here somewhere," I explained, patting the couch in vain.

"Can you give me your phone?" I asked, hoping for a glimmer of light to guide us through the oppressive darkness.

"I forgot it at home," he admitted with a nonchalant shrug, his voice carrying a hint of defensiveness. "I rushed here! It's your fault!" he defended himself.

"How could you just leave without it?" I questioned, genuine disbelief coloring my tone. The realization that we were stranded without any source of light intensified the surreal nature of the situation. A deafening thunderclap reverberated through the house, adding an extra layer of tension to the already charged atmosphere. "Fuck, that was a big one," I remarked, my nerves on edge.

Finally, Jungkook's hands found mine, and he grasped my hand firmly, ensuring we moved in the same direction. The house enveloped us in impenetrable darkness, and my thoughts raced, thinking how we just kissed but we act like nothing happend.

Breaking the uneasy silence, I suggested, "My iPad is in my room. Let's get there to have some light."

"Don't you have flashlights?" Jungkook inquired, his grip on my hand tightening, revealing a touch of vulnerability.

"I took them out about an hour ago, but I have no idea where I put them," I admitted with a sigh, frustration lacing my words.

"Damn, Bri," Jungkook sighed, a subtle chuckle escaping him.

"Hey, you left your phone at home," I retorted, a laugh bubbling up in response to the irony of our predicament.

“Lead the way then,” Jungkook sighed, and we navigated cautiously through the darkness, the air thick with tension. Suddenly, a soft bump resonated through the space, and I winced. “Be careful,” he urged, his hands now assisting me in ascending the stairs.

Reaching the second floor, I extended my arms, feeling for familiar surroundings. The second floor has my room, a guest bathroom, my parent’s room and a guest room. Mine is right next to the stairs.

"Here," I announced, finding my bedroom door. Inside, my fingers fumbled on the nightstand, searching for my iPad. "Damn it, I forgot to charge it. It only has 10%," I exclaimed in frustration. When I looked up, Jungkook's big doe eyes met mine, and I felt a strange warmth despite the chilly darkness.

"I can't believe it," he mumbled, plopping on the bed and reaching for the iPad to illuminate the room.

"I don't really use it," I defended myself.

"Good excuse," he teased, scanning the room with the makeshift light. His attention shifted to a framed photo on my dresser. "That's you?" he asked, pointing to a picture with me and Avery.

I nodded, picking up the photo. "Yeah, next to me is Avery."

He wore an impressed expression. "You sure had a glow-up. How old is this?"

"Like five years ago?" I guessed, placing the photo back on the nightstand.

"And you're..." I realized I hadn't shared my age.

"20," I quickly added, feeling a sudden twinge of self-consciousness.

"Aw, you were just 15," he smiled, studying my face.

"Yeah, and ugly and dumb," I self-deprecated.

"Hey! Don't say that! Now you're just not ugly," he teased, his characteristic smirk on full display.

"What the hell?" I playfully pushed him, and he burst into laughter.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding," he reassured, still chuckling.

"Sure," I sighed, opening the wardrobe to grab a hoodie. The room seemed to grow colder, prompting me to put it on.

"You cold?" He asked, looking over at me.

"A bit," I admitted, biting my lip.

“Damn.” Jungkook muttered, his gaze lingering on me as I pulled the hoodie over my head. The dim light from the iPad cast subtle shadows on his face, emphasizing the uncertainty in his expression.

I caught the hint of something unspoken in the air, prompting me to break the silence. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. I sit next to him now laying down, covering myself in the blanket.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Just thinking about how crazy tonight has been. I mean, I came here on a storm, we went from a blackout to searching for an iPad in the dark.”

I chuckled, the tension easing a bit. “Yeah, it’s been quite the adventure.”

He lays down next to me.

His eyes met mine, a flicker of something more intense passing between us. “And there’s that,” he added, his voice softer now.

“What do you mean?” I inquired, sensing a shift in the atmosphere. Moving myself completely to face him.

“You know,” he started, choosing his words carefully. “The kiss. It happened, and now we’re here in the dark, and it’s like it never did.”

I felt my cheeks warm, the memory of our unexpected kiss replaying in my mind. “Yeah, about that,” I began, unsure where the conversation would lead.

He cut me off with a gentle smile. “I’m not complaining. Just trying to wrap my head around it.”

“Do you wan-“ He cuts me off.

.“I don’t know. Do you want to play 20 Questions or something to pass the time.” He seems very agitated.

“Sure, why not?” I agreed, eager to divert our thoughts. I try to not show how i really feel about just getting over the kiss subject.

“Okay, first question: Where did you grow up?”

His expression shifted momentarily, a flicker of hesitation crossing his features. “Seoul,” he replied vaguely, not offering more details. “You?” He asks curiously.

“Brooklyn.” I sensed his reluctance to delve into the topic, so I changed course. “My parents actually moved to another state a while ago. It’s been strange not having them around.”

Jungkook looked genuinely interested. “Really? Why’d they move?”

“Work,” I explained. “They found better opportunities, and I guess they wanted a change of scenery. It’s just me here now.”

His eyes softened with understanding, and I could tell he wanted to ask more.

Instead, I diverted the conversation to his parents.

“And your folks? What about them?”

I noticed a subtle shift in his demeanor, a guardedness that hadn’t been there before

“They’re around,” he replied vaguely, avoiding eye contact.

I sensed his reluctance and decided not to press further. “Fair enough.

“I’ve been wondering about Ander- If you wanna talk about it. Like how’d you two met and how did you start a freaking band?” He asks, his eyes searching for mine.

“Ander’s been my friend since high school. We both had this crazy obsession with old music, and we bonded over that,” she began, a nostalgic smile playing on her lips. “He initiated that we should make a ‘band,’ and I’d be the lead singer while he’d be the guitarist. He was really talented, playing all day in school, driving teachers crazy. He’s still good, but, you know, people change who they are, not their capabilities.”

Jungkook, his eyes reflecting genuine interest, listened carefully to her story. Brianna, embracing the newfound openness between them, decided to steer the conversation toward Jungkook’s passions.

“Let’s get over that topic,” she chuckled, nudging him playfully. “Tell me, aside from music, what are your other passions or hobbies?”

Jungkook, a plushie of a cat in hand, smiled as he confessed, “Well, I’m into photography.”

“Really?” Brianna’s curiosity sparked, and she straightened on the bed.

“Yeah, I like capturing moments, you know? I’d love to take pictures of you one day,” he said, his smile accompanied by a playful wink.

“If I let you,” she replied, giggling. “Have you ever traveled outside of the US?”

“Yeah, um, I went to almost every country in europe with my family, we stayed like 2 days in each for the summer break when i was in 11th grade. I loved Santorini.”

“Wow. Impressive. So you’re rich rich.” she elbows him. Actually, she was so much impressed than she showed him.

“My parents are, yeah, not me.” He corrects, modesty in his tone.

“Yeah but-“ I got cut off by him again.“You? Have you traveled?”

“Only in some states where i have my aunts or uncles.” I pout and get jealous of how much he’s seen.

“If you could change one decision from your past, what would it be and why?” I ask.

Jungkook paused, then confessed, “I think there’s a part of me that wishes I had pursued music more passionately from the beginning. I held back a bit out of fear.”

I remain silent as I take the cat from

his hand.

“What’s your biggest dream, Brianna?” Jungkook now looks at the cat but his eyes shift to mine, looking for truth.

“To make people feel connected to my music, to make people feel happy, feel sad, party to it, cry to it, to have thousands of people coming to watch me sing for them.”

“Well i’ll tell you a secret, i’m from the future and what you said it’s gonna happen.”

“Come on.” I laugh and punch his arm lightly. “Ok now me again.” I pause and think. “If you could have dinner with anyone, dead or alive, who would it be?”

“Such a “What to ask on a first date” from Wikihow or Buzz Feed kind of stuff question.”

“Fuck off!” they laughed, playful shoves exchanged. “Tell me!” I keep pushing him.

“Ok ok, Elvis Presley. I absolutely adore that man’s music.”

I nod, trying to find someone I’d go to dinner with. “I’d go with Freddy Mercury”

He looks at the ipad that now has

1% “Good choice. Hey, this is about to die.”

“We also don’t have internet connection or signal to see when we’ll get the power back.”

I sigh. Does that mean he’s gonna spend the night? I question myself.

“So lucky of us.” I sigh and look at him

again.

“Yeah.” he shrugs and when the Ipad finally ends it life, we stay in the darkness.

"I'm so bored," Jungkook announces, his voice echoing the monotony of the dark room.

"What's your body count?" I blurt out, surprising even myself with the sudden boldness.

"Damn, straight forward, huh?" he giggles, the dimness concealing the sly grin on his face. "I don't know, I don't count them."

"Approximately. Like you gotta know," I insist, pushing for a hint of revelation.

"I really don't know. You tell me," he challenges, turning the tables on me.

"I'm not telling you," I assert, maintaining a semblance of mystery.

"Why should I then?" he counters, his playful defiance hanging in the air.

"Fair," I sigh, but just as the silence begins to settle, Jungkook decides to unravel a bit of his own mystery. "It's around 15."

Leaning in, I tease, "Oh, I expected much more."

"Do I look like such a fuckboy? Don't answer that," he injects, his tone suddenly serious, only to be met with an eruption of laughter from me. He continues: "Even 15 is much. I wish it was like 2 or 3."

"Yeah, it may not be the best number, but still better than a lot of guys. Mine is 2," I confesses, revealing a surprising layer of vulnerability.

"Boyfriends?" He inquires, sensing there might be more to this story.

"Myeah," I acknowledge with a casual nod.

"I see. Have you ever… had anything with Ander?" Jungkook probes, curious about the dynamics between us.

"Hell no," I asserts "Well, he tried many times, but I friendzoned him until he got over and started liking other girls. He also tried to kiss me but nothing more. If he tried anything else… well, let's just say I'd be singing alone all the time."

"I see," He respond, the room now buzzing with a different energy, laughter and revelations dancing in the dimness. He stays silent a bit before continues in a low voice: “Do you have kinks?”

My hand trembled slightly as I took a sip of water, trying to mask my surprise at Jungkook's unexpected turn in the conversation. His chuckle cut through the awkwardness like a lifeline, and he leaned back, a playful glint in his eyes.

"If you're going to ask me such a personal question, it's only fair I get to ask you one in return," he declared, raising an eyebrow as if challenging me.

"Only if you spill first," I countered, unwilling to let him off the hook.

"I asked first," he retorted, a small smirk playing on his lips.

"I don't care," I shot back, determination in my tone.

"Me neither," he sighed, his gaze holding mine in a playful standoff. The room fell into a sudden, uncomfortable silence, amplifying the sound of tree branches scraping against the house and the howling wind outside. It was still dark.

"When the iPad died, it was around 10 pm," I mumbled, my attempt to bridge the gap with a practical detail.

A wry smile played on Jungkook's lips, his eyes holding a mixture of amusement and curiosity. "And now? Any guesses?"

I shook my head, realizing the absurdity of trying to estimate time in the pitch-black darkness. "No idea. Feels like we've been here forever."

He chuckled, a sound that carried a subtle reassurance. "Time flies, especially when you're in the dark with someone interesting."

A playful smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I navigated the intriguing twists of our conversation. "So you think I'm interesting," I remarked, my smile lingering even though he couldn't see it.

He responded with a sly challenge, delving into a more personal territory. "I might think that if you tell me if you have kinks. I really think everyone does. I was thinking about it some time ago, discovered mine recently."

A mischievous idea crossed my mind. "If you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine."

"I don't want to; I asked first."

"And I don't care you asked first."

"Fuck, Brianna, what do I gotta do to make you say it?" he sighed, frustration evident as he let his head fall onto the pillow.

"Are you really that curious?" I teased, the dim room masking the playful glint in my eyes.

"Fuck yeah, now I am!" he exclaimed.

I pat his arm until I feel his hand, it was big, if you might add, and veiny, full of tattoos, even tho i couldnt see them, i knew they were there.

"You have a... hand kink?" He inquired, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Well, if that's how you call it, then yes."

I confess.

"What exactly do you like about hands?" He now sounds serious and curious, like he really wants to know.

"They're hot. I just... they're hot," I admitted, and as his gaze met mine, I found myself captivated by the intensity in his eyes.

"Do you think mine are?" he whispered, a vulnerability underlying the question.

"Well, I do," I replied, almost hesitating. His hand found my waist, the warmth of his touch sending a shiver through me.

"What do you like, Jungkook?" I asked, the air between us charged with anticipation.

"Hmm, everything, especially you."

“W-what.” I whisper as he gets on top of me. I feel our bodies lean closer together, the heat between us rising with each breath. I run my fingers through Jungkook's hair, caressing his neck and tracing his shoulders. I draw him closer, his lips just moments away from meeting mine. Our lips finally meet, the passion finally released, our tongues mingling in an intimate dance. His hand squeezes mine, the other hand running down my body to my waist. I draw him closer, our bodies tangled intimately. I feel like I’m kissing him for the first time, even if I’m not.

Breaking the kiss, he looked into my eyes, both of us breathless. "Is this okay?" he asked, seeking affirmation for more than just the kiss.

"It's more than okay," I assured him.

"I really like you, Bri," he confessed, his hand gently caressing my face.

"I like you too," I finally admitted, and before he could say anything else, I pulled him into another deep kiss. Fingers entwined in his soft, fragrant hair, our connection deepening with each passing moment.

Suddenly, when everything was almost too perfect, we hear a loud beep, tv starts playing downstairs, the room now being all bright again, outside you couldn’t hear anything anymore. the storm has stopped. lucky us.

My heart raced as I pushed him away, the sudden intensity leaving an awkward tension in the room. "Now that's cringe," I mumbled, trying to diffuse the situation.

"Really?," he replied, a hint of amusement in his voice. He reached for my face, planting a small, lingering kiss on my swollen lips. Laughter escaped him, and confusion etched my features.

"W-what? Why are you laughing?" I stammered, feeling a surge of insecurity.

"Your cheeks, and nose, and forehead—you're blushing so hard," he chuckled. Before I could protest, he gently pushed me back onto the pillow, peppering my face with soft pecks.

"H-Hey!" I managed to utter between giggles, his kisses playfully tickling every inch of my blushing face. He finally stopped, getting up with a mischievous smile.

"Let's go downstairs," he suggested. I gathered myself, taking off my hoodie, revealing a simple tank top and sweatpants. As I left the room, the familiar sounds of a Brooklyn 99 episode echoed through the house. Retrieving my phone, I noticed a slew of messages and the late hour, now reaching 10 o'clock.

"It's late. I think I'll just leave now. When should I come for rehearsals? Also… I'll bring your clothes tomorrow," Jungkook said.

"No problem, maybe, uhh… like 1 pm?" I suggested, my newfound awkwardness betraying the earlier intensity.

"Right. I'll be there," he agreed. Cupping my face, he planted a final soft kiss on my lips. "Take care."

"You too," I replied, closing the door behind him. The weight of the moment lingered, and I couldn't help but reflect on the unexpected turn of events. Oh my god.

———

#bts jk #bts jungkook #bts #jeon jungkook #jeongguk #jk x reader #jk x you #jungkook and reader #jungkook #jungkook x oc

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