#and if that means logging off and slowly taking back my life

[silvershayde]

I have made an executive decision.

I am removing tumblr off of my phone.

Amongst other things. Can’t say I’m happy, sad or anything like that cause, well, I don’t have a good understanding of my own emotions. But I know that I am not okay. Like at all. With how i am and how my life is going, I mean. I basically need to get my shit together.

And I believe the first step is logging off. Cause Tumblr is a nice reprieve right, but I’ve reached a stage where I get off of Tumblr to immediately go back on it and that is not good. I’m going to delete it and my only access to tumblr would be through my laptop but ik im too lazy to go onto my laptop to log on to tumblr. Also my laptop is always dead for some reason so there’s also that.

I’m cutting off a lot of stuff, need to touch some grass so to speak. Maybe even go back to my roots. Not everything obviously, I don’t want to accidentally go insane having no sources of serotonin. They say it takes like 66 days to form a habit, well I’m not putting tumblr amongst other things back on my phone until its november/december. There’s too many things I need to tackle and I’m spiralling. I need to take it a day at a time.

So yeah. I guess that means I’m going on a semi-hiatus. I’m trying to be better and trying to stick to things. But in order to do that I really need to minimise distractions. Which is hard. Really hard. I’m cutting myself off from music too. Just so I can stop my brain from distracting myself. Which sucks. But I need to start somewhere right?

In like an hour or so, tumblr will be off my phone and this hiatus will begin. I’ll see ya’ll whenever. Its been fun!

[lady-ashfade]

soulmate au with percy and reader. i was thinking like reader is like a complete nobody at camp and the daughter of some not really known god. percy and reader meet by accident and they figure out they are soulmates. percy at first didn’t want anything to do with it because he had feelings for annabeth but comes around.

Percy Jackson x Fem!reader. (Soulmate au)

-£ Pictured a older version of book Percy, but imagine them staying a camp or coming late.

-£ words: 1.5 words

-£ warnings: Angst, rejection, jealousy, I love annabeth, percy being mean? Idk. Anyway kinda short. What can I say, I love a man with dark hair who has sass?🤷‍♀️

“Do you ever wonder who you’re soulmates is?” percy sat on the log near the cliff looking over the sunset. annabeth keeping her eyes on the forest below, smiling softly as the orange sun hit her skin.

“I’m not worried about it, they will come to me when the time is right.” she replied with a calm voice.

percy could help himself from looking down at her hand and slowly inching his hand near hers. the marking was just late. he knew that she was his soulmate. how could she not be after everything they went through? besides no one knew him like she did.

fate is a funny thing.

because the person who was chosen to be his, and his alone wasn’t the girl he sat next to. it was you. you barely had any contact with percy. never even spiking a word to each other and yet the world still twined you together.

looking back on it he wished he reacted in a nicer way then he did. anything other then what he did, even faint.

he was running a pile of arrows to the archery training ground when he ran into you. as soon as your eyes met the world was slow for just a second and colors shined brighter then they did. in that moment you both felt something that was more then the gods. something even the gods can’t touch.

“woah,” you whisper with your hands still held onto the arrows he was trying to give to you. his hands didn’t stop clinching onto the wood, he couldn’t believe it.

you blink at him for him to do something other then stand there and stare with a open mouth. sure this type of thing wasn’t normal but he didn’t even move a inch.

but you wished he had stayed quiet, “Look, I um..” he let go of the things you two shared and took a step back with hasted.

“I have to run.” you watched him run off like there was nothing important to keep him here.

At first you thought that he was just shy, in shock, and didn’t know what to say. but you soon figured out he wanted nothing to do with you. you followed him around and tried to talk to him at every chance you got but he would always slip from your fingers.

cornering him in the woods at night wasn’t the best idea but you had but there was not other choice. it didn’t feel good to have your soulmate avoid you.

“There is a mistake.” his voice echoed through the woods, “I feel nothing for you. I am sure you are amazing, but you are not my soulmate.”

he watched the tears pool into your eyes like the waves he controlled. taking a step back from the news from his lips that crushed your soul. “I am in love with another.”

Licking your lips you roll your eyes to try and stop the tears forming. “it’s annabeth isn’t it?” he couldn’t deny it even if he wanted to. the silence he gave when he opened his mouth but nothing came out told you everything you needed to know.

“I do hope you live a happy life,” you walked closer to him only inches away, “especially when she finds her soulmate.” you walked past him and down the dirt path back to your cabin where you broke down.

fate was twisted and cruel for giving you him.

day and night you thought about him. and day and night you got worse. everyone could see the toll of being rejected but no one new by who. not a soul knew about you and percy and you honestly liked it that way. no pity glances when they hung out together. 

soulmate depression was a serious thing and could lead one down to a never reversible illness. your eyes lost their light, no one ever saw you smile, looking as dead like as possible. every positive feeling in your body was drained out.

annabeth looked over at you at diner time as you stared at the plate in front of you, sitting at the edge of the bench. “It’s terrible,” she said and picked at her food with a fork. “I hope they come around.”

the trio stared at you in pity, one of them feeling guilt. “It’s a really bad case, I feel so bad.” Grover looked sad as he almost cried himself. love was supposed to be for real, that’s what soulmates were for! If he had one he would never let them get like that.

Percy found himself studying the girl. Her hair messy, her face grime and eyes blank and darker then the last time he looked in them. And Percy was the cause.

“Yeah,” the black hairy boy turned and poked at his food.

It has been week since then and a weight sunk in his stomach when he thought of you, which was almost every moment now. He thought about how you would smile before and how he wanted to see that again. He really thought he liked annabeth but each day that feeling went away.

Maybe he could think things over. But how could he apologize? Would you still want him?

But as Percy thought over the war in his head you moved on. Or as much as you could. there was a sickness in your body but you tried to fight it and spent time with your friends.

one boy took you in quickly. the two of you now glued at the hip and he was the only one who seemed to make you smile now.

“Dude,” Grover knocked his shoulder with his own, “What did he do to you?”

The son of Poseidon darted his eyes lowly at some boy. The way you smiled ever so sweetly like he has been wishing to see for weeks but this- This guy could cause it easily. And those small laughed he could hear so faintly in his ears.

“Nothing.” Percy stated while still glaring at the guy heavily.

the satyr nodded but lingered his eyes on his friend for a few seconds. clearly not believing him one bit.

“I have to tell you something,” he pulled his eyes away from you and to his friend. Guilt covering his face. “You know how y/n got reflected by her soulmate?” his voice shaky.

“Of course, it was hard to watch.” He answered. It didn’t take long for him to connect the dots when Percy lifted his brows as a sign. Grover gasped loudly.

“You did- Oh my god’s. How could you?” His mouth was then covered by Percy as he shh’d him.

Percy took a big breath as he held his hand over his mouth, “I’m not proud of it. It was just, I didn’t feel like we could be. I thought me and annabeth were soulmates until they came along,” he turned his eyes back to your direction to find you laughing slightly with your friends.

“I was terribly wrong.”

As much as Grover was mad at his friend he could see the guilt and regret on his face. He helped him come up with a plan, and gave him a very long lecture about love. Annabeth found out, and cursed him out. Saying that the marks don’t lie and was overly upset he could do that for her.

it took a week of long work for him to build up the courage to finally talk to you.

lucky he knew exactly where you would be. in the same stop he saw you for the first time as his soulmate. In the training grounds. You had been walking back to your cabin looking as beautiful as always even with your gloomy change.

you had a basket in your hand. you hummed quietly and kept your eyes on the dirt path underneath your feet. you were too out of it to hear him walking from behind you. “Y/n.” He called your name.

turning around startled you are met with him smiling at you. the boy who broke your heart standing there with a warm smile on his face as if he didn’t do anything wrong.

“Percy.” You whisper and step back. “I um…Do you need something?” you were shaking almost.

He got closer slowly as he got more awkward by the second, “can we talk?” you were hesitant to expect his offer but you nodded.

“I want to apologize for rejecting you. I felt horrible watching you- Well, get like this.” He kept getting closer and you didn’t know if you should run away or scream at him.

“I was wrong. You are the girl for me.” He saw the tears flood in the corner of your eyes and your lips tremble

“you think that’s enough?” you didn’t yell but he could sense the harsh tone in your voice. And you have that right.

“No, not really.” his frowns. Knowing he needed to do more.

“But I’m willing to work as hard as I need to. If you will have me?”

His green eyes filled with sorrow. the feeling to leave him here, with nothing like he did to you. But you couldn’t. You felt better in his presence as he looked at you.

“I’ll allow it, but we take this slow.” All he could do was smile again and nod his head in understanding.

even if you didn’t trust him. he healed your heart in the matter of seconds.

[yunniestars]

"maybe this time, love won't end."

. . . ACT I. "Logged Out" ʚɞ pairing: kinich x gn!reader

oh archons, the nerves have never been wrecking so much before.

he was in front of your residence, and the place feels all too familiar. it was definitely a different location, but the taste in decoration screamed you. ah, this felt so surreal, he thought.

taking in deep breaths, he knocked on the wooden door. the doorknob starts to unlock, opening the door and...

"hello, how can i help you?"

oh. that sweet, velvety voice. the one he missed so much.

he couldn't believe his eyes, it really was you. the same person who changed the trajectory of his life and gave it meaning. his star, moon, sun, and everything. the one who made him feel like a lovesick fool, but he'll never regret being one. the jewel that no mora he earns will ever buy. his-

"um, if you're just going to gape at me, then i'm shutting the door." you say with an annoyed look on your face.

"i'm sorry?" he blurts out. okay, that was a mistake, but he's genuinely confused -- were you joking at him?

"uh, excuse me? do you expect me to just let you in? i'm not expecting visitors at the moment, so go leave or else i call someone-"

"ah wait! i'm..." he tries finding a good excuse to stay. suddenly, he remembers the other reason why he's here. "i'm the one for your commission. yeah."

your face then lights up, demeanor going from irritated to overjoyed. "oh then why didn't you say so! gosh, and here i was thinking on methods to get rid of you as soon as possible!"

he then gets hugged by you, the same warmth he used to bask himself in, but right now, it felt... strange. the warmth wasn't the same as before.

you then let go of him, with a cheery grin. "i'm y/n l/n. your name?"

what?

"...kinich. 'malipo' kinich." he responds, a wave of disappointment washing him over.

"great! so, the last time i saw my yumkasaur..." your voice suddenly starts to slowly disperse, words breaking down into inaudible mumbles as if he shut down every sound around him.

you didn't remember him.

୨୧

"my baby!"

you run up to your yumkasaur who ziplines to you, happy to see you after such a long time. kinich watches the scene unfold at him, unsure on how to feel.

the entire time, you were behaved like the same person he loved so much before. the same old yapper who pulled his heartstrings like their life was on the line. except... you acted as if you didn't know him.

"how have you been?" kinich breaks the ice as you two head over the place you say your yumkasaur was last seen.

"that's quite the question for someone you just met... but i guess i've been pretty lonely? after all, pipo has been away from me for so long."

and since then, you continued talking about pipo and the conversation longed on as if you were just getting to know each other.

perhaps for you it was like that, even if he couldn't believe it, but to him, he knew every single thing about you.

however, for some reason, it feels as if his knowledge of you was just useless now.

"thank you for finding pipo for me, i don't know what i would've done," you cry while hugging kinich, who didn't know if he wanted to hug back or just distance himself. "um, as for the compensation..."

"nevermind that," he cuts you off.

your eyes widen in shock. "what? no! i need to pay you. i'll feel guilty my entire life if i just take this for free -- take it!" you hand him a bag of mora, but he shakes his head.

"just... compensate me by being with me. i'll never ask for anything more again," he says in a low whisper, but loud enough for you to hear.

you tilt your head, but nod. "okay then, let's be friends!"

oh, that took a deep cut. you've really forgotten about him.

he took a deep sigh, and nodded back. "friends, then."

well, it's better than being nothing with you.

୨୧ prologue | act ii ୨୧ masterlist

♡ tags: @lvvcian @sunsethw4

a/n: thank you for reading the first chapter! i'm sorry it's really short haha, but i hope it was enjoyable nevertheless. idk when i can update again, but i have a lot of ideas in my mind right now, so probably 2-3 days from now. also, thank u to the nice comments that were left at my work! it's been motivating me to continue so it means a lot haha. love u all

[brossession-collection]

Dad's Cam Show (Re-uploaded)

Note: This is a story I wrote in 2020 that was previously deleted by Tumblr. Couldn't find it until I stumbled upon am old hard drive. Hope you enjoy.

--

This social distancing shit is so boring. I get it. It’s needed. But god damn am I running out of things to do. Can’t even meet the guys I’ve been talking to on Grindr. Worse yet is that I’m stuck back at home. I was supposed to graduate college this year! Instead I was slumped over a computer screen in my PJs with my dad making his special pancakes. Ugh. Fuck this shit. I just wish I could go back to a better time.

Whatever. I’m done complaining. Dad’s getting groceries which means I can snoop around his shit. Yeah I’m that bored.

Dad’s a big burly guy. Heading into his mid-forties now and starting to gray up a little, but still keeping his body builder life style. He’s pretty open with me. He told me he used to do cam shows back before livestreams were even a thing. Made sense. Had to show off the bod somehow. Don’t know how mom thought about it but whatever. She’s out of the picture.

His room always had a musky woodsy cologne-y smell. His laundry hamper was even better. I always loved taking his briefs out of there and putting them on myself. I’ve been following his footsteps and bodybuilding myself, but I’m still a ways away before I have an ass and waist as large as his. So his 36in undies droop a bit. I grabbed his black cap too. Man. He loves this thing. Well, plus the 10 others caps he has. He always had it topping his head. Pretty sure he wears it to sleep too. I put it on and flexed like him. I got a bit of a boner but nothing crazy.

His dinosaur of a laptop was open, and logged in. I know I shouldn’t have, but I did it anyways. There were so many folders within folders. So much boring shit… and then I found “cam pics.”

The briefs I was wearing tented and wetted. Fuck I was so scared to open it. But I clicked it and… In there was only one image. I clicked on it to make it bigger and it was my dad. About 13 years ago. He was shirtless, and wearing the same cap that I have on my head right now. My eyes drifted from his hairy arms to his chest to eventually his bearded face. He looked so… tired? There was something about the softness in his expression that really got to me. And then…

“Hey son! I’m home! Could ya help me with the groceries?”

Shit. I got up and scrambled. The briefs were soaked and still being soaked. I had so many windows to close out of. Then I started hearing his footsteps come closer. I panicked and grabbed the top of the laptop to close it, but I couldn’t move. Suddenly, all the windows on the screen started to close. All except for the image of dad I had opened it. It enlarged by itself, and then the laptop started to fucking shake. I tried to get it to stop but it just kept rumbling. Fuck it. I wound up my fist and punched the screen. But there was no impact.

In less than a second my body followed my wrist into the screen. Everything went bright, and I was in a different room. I looked around. It looked like my parents’ room at our old house. The same laptop was in front of me showing the same image as before. Dad’s younger face looking back… And then I saw his eyes move. I froze. I looked at the time. 12:56 turned to 12:57. This wasn’t an image. It was a fucking livestream.

I slowly tilted my head. Dad did the same. I widened my eyes. So did dad. A smile crept over our faces. I just time travelled! And into dad’s body! Fuck there was so much I could do now!

“PING”

A old-school AIM notification popped up on screen. I maneuvered dad’s hand to the mouse and clicked on it. “Hey daddy. You gonna give us a show or what?”

“PING”

“Let’s see those hairy pits man!”

Fuck. I guess dad wasn’t kidding about these cam shows. Shit how do I reply? Do I just say something?

“Uh…” I gulped. Dad’s gruff voice was in my throat. “You guys mean… uh… this?” I lifted and flexed dad’s right arm. Immediately his armpit hair bursted out. Moist and smelly. My nose naturally turned towards the sweaty pit. Holy fuck was it musky. I took a deep whiff and groaned.

“PING. PING. PING. PING.”

“Fuck yeah daddy. Sniff that pit.”

“God damn you’re a big guy. How’s it feel huh?”

It felt amazing being so big. Watching everything I was doing be reflected by my dad on the recording was even better. The cockiness came in.

I wheeled the office chair back and did a double bicep pose. Sweat dripped off his hairy pits. I gave my face a rub and felt his beard scratch against his callused fingers. Then my hands felt the need to go down to his chest. I never felt so much pleasure from nipple rubbing in my life. The pings kept on coming. It was euphoric.

Dad’s cock was tenting the briefs I had put on earlier. I uncaged his 7 incher and let out a whiff of junk musk that filtered into my nose immediately. I started stroking and couldn’t stop. My other hand reached under dad’s taint, through the forest of pubes, and rammed a dildo into my dad’s ass crack.

“PING. PING. PING.”

“Holy fuck this is new! We gonna see a fingering show today!?”

“God damn man you enjoying yourself?”

I was. Everytime Dad’s moans left my throat I felt cock twitch a little bit harder. It just felt so amazing to feel his beefy arms rub against his beefy chest. His toes curling with every electric shock of pleasure moving through his beefy ass and legs.

I shot his load. Let out a gutteral yell. And it didn’t stop coming. My beard was soaked with three shots of cum. Chest was drenched with eight more. At this point, sweat was trickling down my temples. I relished in dad’s orgasm and then relaxed in the chair.

I watched as the notifications went crazy. Dad’s soft eyes housing my consciousness. Ugh. It felt incredible. I glanced over at his hat and felt the need to take it off. I did, and felt a wave of cool relief come off my head. Dad’s hair was cropped short, like a messy crew cut. And it was dripping with sweat. I felt the need to say something.“You like that, men?” Dad had so much suave in voice. The pings accelerated.I smiled and played with my cock. I could feel another round coming but felt a bigger presence unfold. Suddenly dad’s body started to shake. I tried controlling it, but I couldn’t weigh him down. My arms were flailing before my hands grabbed onto the edges of the desk. I whipped my head back, then head-butted the laptop screen. Light filtered through.

I was back at home, in my dad’s loose fitting briefs, his cap nestled on my head. Dad’s footsteps came by, then turned another direction. Guess he wasn’t coming by his room just yet. I looked down at his briefs, now soaked with my cum. Fuck. Was it just a dream?

It must’ve been. Just a fucking horny fever dream. What the fuck ever. Better than what I had been doing up until now. I leaned over to close the laptop but noticed something.

The image had turned into a recording.

[wolvwa]

"BAKU-CHAN!"〃

Katsuki x fem!reader

Part 1/?

A bit ooc? Some angst but mostly fluff,, I think most of us need it right now

Notes; not proof read, perchance a bit self indulgent...

"Who are you?"

Those were words Katsuki Bakugou thought he would never hear. Nonetheless, from a girl hogging up the swings!

"I-I told you yesterday! Do you have short-term memory or something!?"

"That's a long name..."

"You idiot! My name is Katsuki Bakugou, and you better remember it this time! When I'm number one, you'll have no choice!" The boy whose name you had forgotten spoke with such pride and confidence it made you feel a little small. How can someone so little have such big goals?

You wanted to be a hero, too. You were always told your quirk wasn't suited for it, though. But still, you had some hope, and you'd settle for being in the top 100s! Anything at all, really. But this boy was yammering on about being at the total top.

"Kaachan!" A smaller voice interrupted your train of thought and the blonde before you groaned. "Ignore him, he's not gonna be anything!" He said confidently which made the other boy falter slightly.

"Why?" You blinked.

"Hah? Are you new here or something?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"He's quirkless, that's why!" The boy huffed, taking another step towards the sandbox. "Now, move over, idiot!"

You narrow your eyes in thought, trying to recall what just happened. You weren't all that interested until he brought up heroes.

"It's okay. I'm not scared of cooties anymore cause my mama said they aren't real. We can play together, Baku-chan."

Katsuki's eye twitched as he watched you scoot over in the sandbox and look up at him expectantly.

"W-What!?"

"Cooties aren't real–"

"No! What did you call me!?" He interrupted.

"Baku-chan."

"That's not my name! Kat-su-ki Ba-ku-gou!" He exclaimed, speaking slowly as if teaching a newborn how to said their first word. Except you just stared up at him with those big eyes.

"But he called you Kaachan." You deadpanned, pointing to the greenette behind him who flinched.

"But he's a loser and doesn't matter!"

"Sorry, Baku-chan."

(҂` ﾛ ´) ... ( ՞ -՞ )

You got on Katsuki's last, first, and fifth nerve. Like Deku, you followed him around like a damn dog. Scratch that—a koala. Wherever he was, you were behind him and clinging onto his shirt.

It took you three weeks to remember his actual name.

While all the girls avoided the boys, him especially, it seemed like you were glued to him the second your eyes met.

Which is why he can't have you following that damn Deku around, too! You were his fan, after all!

"Baku-chan? Where are we going?"

"Somewhere Deku is too scared to go." Katsuki replied with a grumble, tightening his grip on your hand. Since Deku followed him around all the time, his loserness was rubbing off on you!

Translation; you and Deku were becoming friends.

Sitting on a log, Katsuki finally let go of your hand. You looked around for the first time before looking back down at him and taking a seat next to him. "Back up, would you?" Katsuki grumbled, scooting over.

Of course, you immediately scooted right back to his side. "Baku-chan," you spoke up. "How come you don't like Deku?"

The boy scoffed. "Isn't it obvious? He's a quirkless nobody!"

"Well, yeah. But you don't have to be mean about it."

"Huh? Why not!? Someone has to put him in place!"

"....someone needs to put you in your place..." you muttered, but Katsuki heard you. He felt his eye twitch.

"Haaaah!? You wanna die!? You're lucky I'm letting you be my sidekick! You know how many losers wanna be my sidekick!?" He exclaimed, sparks crackling explosions to life in his palms.

"No, I dont."

"Well, there's tons! And you're lucky, damnit!"

"Sure I am..."

( 〃 ．．) .... ヽ(`▽´)ﾉ

You were awkward. Like a wet paper bag.

That's what Katsuki says, anyway.

"Baku-chan, I don't get it still." You frown, staring down at the homework. Despite being held hostage by an villian, Katsuki was determined to say it meant nothing and Tutor you. Though, he was too distracted to teach properly—more distracted than you.

He was sure if your skull cracked open and he looked inside, there would be nothing but clouds and that sweet pudding junk you ate all the time.

By the time you had came onto the scene, Katsuki didn't know if he should be mad or relieved.

You tried dragging Deku away (which wasn't particularly hard considering you were only a bit taller than him.)

Still, the fact you ran in pissed him off. He wasn't sure why.

"Shut it, Koko."

"Koko?"

"I can't get rid of you." The boy deadpanned before groaning. "That's enough, not my fault you're dumb as a rock. Can't have my sidekick stupid, though... so come back tomorrow so you don't fail on me." Katsuki grumbled, avoiding eye contact with you. You frowned slightly before beginning to pack up your things.

"(Name)? You're leaving so early?"

Katsuki's mother, Mitsuki You met her when Katsuki hit you for calling him Baku-chan infront of the middle schoolers. She hit him way harder.

Katsuki was convinced she loved you more than him.

"Oh, yeah." You nodded. "Baku-chan," you turned to Katsuki as you stood up.

"I'm walking with Deku tomorrow."

While Mitsuki smiled at the mention of the boy and began to ramble a bit, Katsuki froze. You smiled, waving them goodbye and walked home.

The next day, Katsuki avoided you.

And the day after that, and the day after that.

Soon enough, you found yourself alone with Deku.

You weren't mean to him, but it was clear you thought he was completely delusional for wanting to be a hero.

When your mom had found out Deku lived nearby, she practically demanded that you walk with him to school. She can't have her baby traveling so far to walk with a delinquent every day when there's a sweet normal boy in the next complex!

And so she unknowingly crushed your friendship with Katsuki.

"Baku-chan."

"Baku-chan?"

"Baku-chan!"

"Baku-chaaaannn!!!"

Katsuki hasn't felt his eye twitch so much.

Every damn day of summer, you knocked on his door.

You found yourself alone more than ever.

Deku suddenly had a busy schedule, and most of your friends just teased you the whole time you hung out.

Katsuki was bitter. It's always Deku. Deku, who has everything he doesn't despite being a nobody. Katsuki couldn't understand it.

Soon enough, summer went by, and you and Katsuki were still not on talking terms. Anytime he came home to you talking with Mitsuki in the living room (she heard you shouting for him and let you in), he would walk to his room without a second glance.

"(Name)? You've been frowning a lot recently." Deku spoke up with a worried frown of his own. "Are you worried about the exams?"

"No. I'm okay, Izuku. I don't care that much about that stuff–"

Deku shut down, sputtering as he stared at you with his mouth agape. You called him Izuku.

"A-Are you sure you're okay!?"

"I just said I was. Are you okay?"

"I'm okay!" He nodded quickly.

"Baku-chan is mad at me. And im not sure why." You mumbled after some silence, staring at the waters of the beach. It's been much cleaner lately. Deku snapped out of his shock, frowning again as you spoke.

"Well... it started when you started talking to me again. A-And we became friends...–"

"Huh. I thought we were always friends?" You deadpanned, looking over to him. He frantically waved his hands around, trying to explain himself, but you subconsciously tuned him out. He paused, sweating nearvously. The way you were looking at him made it seem like you were mad at him, but in reality you were in the clouds again, trying to clear them up as the cogs started turning.

.

.

.

"I dont get it."

And that was all you said for the rest of the night.

You never called him Izuku after that.

(｡ ˊᯅˋ ) ... (҂` - ´)

You ended up the general studies. Not surprising, but at least you were smart enough to get in.

You had a heart attack every time Deku texted you about a villain attack. Naturally, the two of you grew close. That only fueled Katsuki's hatred for the freckled boy.

Katsuki couldn't stand it at first—being able to walk into school. Without you. It felt weird. He'd look behind his back to look for that little tug of yours, but there was nothing there. He thought about replying to your texts, your bugging, your loud ass yelling. He'd probably just yell and slam the door anyway.

It felt like it had been forever since he'd seen you.

So, during a break in the sports festival, seeing you assaulting a vending machine wasn't exactly what he was expecting. Mumbling curses as you grabbed the machine by its sides, shutting your eyes and shaking it roughly. You were trying to get that sweet ass pudding junk.

Before he thought about it, he approached and shoved you to the side. You blinked, looking over to him as he set off a few explosions and grabbed the small cup of pudding. There was a long silence as he shoved the cup in front of your chest.

.

.

.

"...who are you?"

You cheeky bastard.

Katsuki felt that familiar irritation bubble up. He knew you were just messing with him... atleast he hoped so.

"Take your sugary shit. Maybe if you cut down on this junk, you could have made it into the hero course. I knew you were below me, but this is just sad." He scoffed.

You didn't argue, taking the cup with a smile. "Okay."

"Okay? Is that how you thank people?"

"No. Just you—you ignored me so I'm not thankful." ((.❛ ᴗ ❛.))

Katsuki's eye twitched again as he clenched his fist. "Well im not ignoring you now, am I!?"

"Well... not now."

[raya-hunter01]

WIP Wednesday (Even thought it's Saturday)

Thank you empressdede and @whatdoeseverybodywant for the tag. This has been sitting in my drafts since December. Enjoy!!

The Christmas Present

Jey's Annual Christmas Party

“There is nothing wrong with Sefa, take that back. Your being plan mean now,” I said offended as Tori one of the new divas was talking about him as he stood across the room totally unaware, or maybe he was, and he just didn’t give a shit what people thought of him.

He always moved in silence…Guarded and the halls always cleared when they saw him coming.

“Get real Eden, it has to be something wrong with him. He just stands there like a knot on a log and doesn’t say anything. I wonder does he show emotions when he has sex or is he like a robot,” she said as Trin interrupted her public undressing of the tribal heir.

“Ain’t nothing wrong with my brother-in-law, he just ain’t with the drama that ya’ll asses bring. Plus, he likes his women real, not surgically enhanced,” Trin said as I smiled at the offended look and Tori’s face before she stormed off.

“Damn tell her how you feel, Trin,” I laughed as she smiled.

“Girl, she mad because he won’t give her the time of day and he likes you,” Trin said winking at me as I shook my head at her before stealing a glance at the baby brother of the Fatu family.

I have to admit, I liked him too, but he was dangerous. They say the most dangerous man in the room is one that doesn’t know the power he has over others, and I don’t think he knows the power he truly has.

I was drawn to him, there was a sadness to him that just made me want to hold him.  

The chaos of the Christmas party long forgotten as I saw him talk to his brothers for a few minutes before going upstairs.

“When are you going to tell him, you like him?’ Trin asked as I sipped on my champagne. “I’m not ready to date yet, Trin,” I said as she scoffed.

“Bullshit It’s been over a year, you need to have some fun,” she said as her thoughts echoed in my mind.

My last relationship had me leery on letting someone into my life again. It’s not every day your boyfriend cheats on you with your cousin. I’m not scared to admit that it fucked me up, but I am slowly working through it.

“I’m going to tell him Merry Christmas, then order me an uber,” I said as she smirked at me.  “An uber? Girl, go upstairs and lay up under that man, stop playin’,” Trin said as I sighed.

“Uh, we are rarely home and I’m going to sleep in my own bed tonight, thank you very much. Plus, I’m sure Jey don’t want folks having sex in his house,” I said giving her a hug as she laughed.

“Aye, where my hug at?” Jey asked engulfing us both in his strong arms. “I really enjoyed the party boo, but I’m about to head out,” I said as he kissed my cheek.

“Head up and see lil bro before you leave. He’s in the spare bedroom, you know where it’s at,” he said as I gave him another hug before going upstairs. The music becoming fainter as I went to the other side of the house.

How do you tell someone you want them to rearrange your insides respectively without sounding desperate. Gently knocking on the door I leaned up against the frame, my hair flowing wild and free as I anxiously waited.

“Who is it?” He asked opening the door as I smiled trying to hide my nervousness. The shocked look on his face told me all I needed to know I made the right decision to come up to see him.

“Are you alone?” I asked as he nervously gulped but couldn’t resist being a smart ass. “Oh, I got a whole party going on in here, you don’t see all these people” he said smartly as I rolled my eyes “Always the smart ass,” I whispered as he cracked a smile.

 “It’s always just me, you know that,” he said as I built up my nerve.

 “Well, how would you like to have a real party for two?” I asked shyly as he opened the door wider allowing me inside as I put my coat on the dresser.

“I was just listening’ to some music on the tv to unwind,” he said clearing his throat going over to turn it off. “No, leave it on,” I whispered sitting down in the chair beside the bed as he turned it down a little and sat down on the bed.

“What happened you been avoiding me all night?” I asked truly wanting to know what was wrong. “I got some shit on my mind, I had to take the kids back to their mom and they didn’t want me to leave,” he said as I sympathized with him.

“I know it gets hard but it’s going to get better, I know it is. They know you love them and just keep making sure they know that.” Reaching over I rubbed his knee in support as he stoic expression never changed but he nodded.

“I just hate I won’t get to spend Christmas with them tomorrow, but I guess I should be thankful they got to open a few of their gifts from me tonight.”

 “Maybe you should call her and see could you stop in and just be there for when they open their other gifts tomorrow,” I suggested as he sighed pulling out his phone texting his ex-wife.  

I hoped she lets him do that, it’s bad enough she moved the kids back here to Pensacola without him knowing.

 I saw a small smile pass his face as he got a text alert. “She said I could come in the morning to see them open their gifts, and eat breakfast with them,” he said as I smiled brightly at him, truly happy for him.

“I’m glad she changed her mind, I can’t even imagine being without my baby on Christmas,” I said as he grabbed my hand, causing me to blush.

“Enough about me though, how is Kason?” he asked as I smiled brightly at the mention of my son’s name. “He’s great, my mom has him for tonight. She thought I needed the break.”

“You do, I mean your like superwoman. You make sure all our schedules are good and constantly taking care of us all. Then you’re a mom to a very busy ten-month-old. Hell, when we leave the building, your night is just getting started,” he said as I tried not to smile.

 He actually was taking notice and appreciative of my work and who I was as a person.

“Yea, it does but I’m just glad Joe talked them into getting me a bus so I can bring him on the road with me. I love how kid friendly the backstage atmosphere is now under Paul’s leadership.”

“Yea, he has that part down good. Now if only the gossip mill would stop wit they shit, maybe I could walk the halls and not be judged by people that don’t even know me,” his voice trailed off.

I knew he heard the whispers of our coworkers. They were afraid of him, they bought into the persona, but I knew better. He was shy and misunderstood but it was their loss and my gain.

“I wanna dance,” I said standing up and holding my hand out to him as his eyes seemed unsure. It was almost as if he wanted to look around to see if there was anyone else in the room with us.

“Uh, with me?” he asked as nodded, not trusting my voice. “It’s a lot that comes along with this and I know you ain’t ready,” Sefa whispered his eyes piercing my soul as I yearned for him.

“Stop worrying, I’m a big girl and I know what I want,” I said unashamed as he licked his lips. “Is that right? Well, tell me again what you want beautiful,” His deep voice awakening something within me that had been doormat for far too long.

“I want to dance with you…Right here…. Right now,” I declared as he stood up pulling me close, our foreheads touching as I caressed his face.

 His nervousness making me almost shy, but I knew if this was going to happen tonight, I needed to take charge. “Sefa, I don’t want to be alone tonight,” I whispered as his eyes found mine again.

Clearing his throat, I waited with bated breath for his answer. “I don’t wanna be alone tonight either,” he whispered nodding as I released the breath I was holding.

 “I was hoping you would say that,” I said, my fingers playing with his beard as he caressed my hips.

 Building up my courage, I tested the waters with a gentle kiss as a deep groan fell from his lips as we tasted each other.

Suddenly, Sefa pulled me closer, deepening our kiss making it even more impossible for me to gather my myself as he ravaged my mouth with his. My hands gripping the back of his shirt as I whimpered against his lips in pleasure.

His kisses, powerful and intentional as I weakened in his arms.

“Mm, Sefa”, I gasped as he released my lips. Shit, he can kiss, and he knew it by the sly smile that adorned his handsome face as we both caught our breaths.

  “You sure?” he asked as I nodded, his hands caressing my face as he claimed my lips again.

“Mmm, tell me you want me and that I ain’t trippin’ right now,” he whispered, his passionate gaze making me fall even deeper under his spell.

“Yes, I want you,” I moaned as his thumb caressed my lower lip. “You want my head between your thighs eatin' that sweet pussy don’t you?”

 His deep voice sending shivers down my spine as I purred in anticipation.

“Yes! Please Sefa,” I begged unashamed, yearning to be claimed as he licked his lips.

“You want all this dick up in dat pussy rearranging them tight walls don’t you?”

Fuck, he knew his power, and I was already under his spell, ready and willing as I whimpered against him unable to speak.

“Are you ready for all of me Eden, I can be a lot baby, but I promise you ain’t gon’ never forget me.”  

I nodded, rendered powerless as his lips slowly descended upon mine, our kisses becoming deeper and more desperate by the second.

“Yes, take me,” I gasped finally finding my voice as we fell onto the bed.  Our lips and hands exploring each other desperately. “You sure?” he whispered against my lips, as I nodded again.

 “Let me here you, Eden. Do you want me?” he groaned, grabbing my hands pinning them above my head as he towered over me .

 “I want you,” I moaned as a low growl fell from his lips. “I want you too,” he moaned claiming my lips again with urgency as I gasped at the intensity but welcomed it.  

I was losing myself, losing myself in him and I loved it.

Whimpering against his mouth, he abruptly released my lips and let my hands go. “Why did you stop?” I panted trying to catch my breath as he searched my face for discomfort.

 “I knew you weren’t ready for this; I’m moving too fast.  Your scared of me, aren’t you?” he asked as I looked at him in confusion.

“What are you talking about?” I asked not getting how he gathered that conclusion.

“Look, I can take it alright, just tell me your scared of me like everybody els is," he said as I sat up beside him still trying to catch my breath.

“Scared of you? Boy, if anything I needed to breathe so I wouldn’t die on your ass,” I said as he looked at me in confusion.

“I’m serious Sefa, whether you know it or not, your very intense and I like it. It actually makes it hard for me to not lose myself around you,” I confessed as he searched my eyes for any deception in my words.  

 “I’m not scared of you Sefa, if I was, I wouldn’t have come up her,” I said reaching over and placing my hand on his knee.

“You sure you’re not scared?  You would tell me, right?” he asked as I smiled at him.

“Now, if you would have asked me this last year, I would have said yes without a second thought. But, I know you now, and up under that tough enforcer attitude you’re a teddy bear,” I said getting up off the bed and going over to the table to fix me a shot of Tequilla.

“I couldn’t tell that you were scared, you chewed my ass out for not speaking to you the first time we ever talked,” he said as I laughed.

“Hell, its rude to not to say at least hello to someone when they speak to you.”

“A’ight you right, I was wrong,” he said as an idea popped into my head.

“Now, since we got that covered, how bout we get out of here and go to my house. I have a beautiful view of the beach and plenty of privacy,” I offered as he stood up slowly walking towards me.

“Going somewhere more private sounds perfect, I mean we don’t need everybody in our business,” he said as I nodded in agreement. Last thing any of us needed was the gossip mill in our business.

 “I’m happy we’re on the same page, let’s get out of here.”

It was easy to sneak away as the party was in full swing, but Sefa shot Jey a text to let him know he was taking me home and would hit him up later.

The ride to my house at first was quiet but something shifted in the atmosphere as leaned over and playfully nipped at his neck as he drove.

“You playin’ a dangerous game Eden,” he growled as I smiled against his neck slowly reaching down, slipping my hands inside his sweats as he groaned.

“Mmhm, a big dangerous game at that and I can’t wait to play,” I whispered in his ear, as I slowly began to stroke him.

 “Damn, you like playin’ with danger, don’t you?” he moaned as I smiled against his neck. His breathing became more ragged as his hands gripped the steering wheel.

 “Yes, now eyes on the road, I got you,” I whispered as he groaned in appreciation. “Mm, shit… Well, go on then and do your thang.”

 My mama ain’t raised no punk, so Sefa’s bout to get a preview of what’s to come. I just pray it don’t get us killed.

“Make the next right and go about two miles up the road, my house is the last one up on the hill,” I whispered in his ear as one of his hands caressed my thigh.

 “I’mma tear dat pussy up, you know dat right,” he moaned. His deep voice echoing throughout the car and making me even wetter than I already was as I continued to stroke him.

 “Yes, and I can’t wait,” I whispered as his grip on the wheel tightened. “Are we almost there?” he gasped as I smirked knowing he was close as I decided to talk him through it.

“You like my hands pleasing you, don’t you?” I asked as he nodded in concentration putting his other hand back on the wheel.

“Don’t hold back, I want you to let go,” I encouraged as he melted into me. “There is my house, turn in and park,” I said as he quickly pulled into my driveway, throwing the car in park and cutting it off.

"Now, keep your hands on the wheel,” I said as he turned, resting his forehead against mine, keeping his hands on the wheel as I continued to please him.

“Why did you come with me tonight?” I whispered, licking his lips as groaned catching my tongue between his lips as we shared a sloppy wet kiss.

 “Mmm, you know why. Tell me why you wanted me to come?” he moaned, trying to regain control of the situation.

“I wanted you to devour this pussy,” I whispered as he moaned against my lips.

“Now you tell me why you came? Tell me Sefa,” I whispered, beginning to stroke him faster as he gasped.

 “I wanted to have you all to myself and make you scream my fuckin’ name all night long,” he growled grasping my face and claiming my lips in a passionate kiss as he came.

His body trembling as he found his much-needed release. Looking handsome more than ever as he rode out his climax as I watched in awe.

Yea, he defiantly needed that, and I was happy to help.  

“Damn Eden, that was-” he moaned caressing my face, not able to finish his sentence, I smiled.

“It was my pleasure,” I whispered tenderly kissing his lips.

“Now, let me see if you taste as good as you look right now,” I said as he watched me through heavy lids.  

Slowly I leaned down, and licked his cum off of his stomach as he gasped in shock at my actions. Not leaving a single drop, I then slid back into my seat. “Let me see Eden, open up beautiful.” Staring innocently at him, I opened my mouth and released my tongue for him to see.

 “Fuck, dats what I’m talkin’ bout. Mmhm, now swallow dat shit,” he commanded as I did as he instructed.

“Mmm, you taste good,” I whispered licking my lips as he moaned. His powerful gaze awakening the woman within me.   

“You askin’ for trouble,” he hissed as I smirked, before exiting the car as he readjusted himself back into his sweats.

Anxiously, I went to unlock the front door, before turning around to see if Sefa was behind me, but he was still sitting in the car in a daze.

“Stop overthinking Sefa, it’s no rules here,” I said going inside and heading upstairs, dropping articles of clothing along the way as I made my way to my room.

 Hearing his footsteps, I sat down on the side of the bed, crossing my legs wearing only my black stilettos and a smile.

In all honesty I was scared to death, but excited if that made sense.

 My heart began to race as Sefa appeared in the doorway in all his naked glory. My pussy drippin’ and throbbing in anticipation, knowing at any moment he was going to completely engulf me within his flame, and I couldn’t wait.

“I see your waiting for me like a good girl,” he whispered as I smiled holding out my hand to him as he came closer.

“I see you’re ready again,” I whispered looking at his throbbing erection as he smirked.  “Oh, I stay ready and you betta be ready,” he said his voice making me wet as fuck as I moaned at his words.

“Come find out,” I whispered as he took my hand and smiled.  “Are you sure?” he asked once again kneeling before me as I smiled.

 “More than you’ll ever know,” I said as our lips met in another passionate kiss.

 “Merry Christmas, Sefa.”

 “Merry Christmas, Eden” he whispered easing me back onto the bed as I welcomed all of him.  His hands caressing my body as raked my nails down his back in pleasure as he nibbled and sucked on my breasts.

 “Let me see if you taste as good as I imagined,” he panted moving his kisses to my stomach as I gasped.  Fuck, with how this man kisses I know he can give some bomb ass head.

“Are you gon’ give it all to me like a good girl?” Sefa asked dipping his tongue into my belly button as I moaned, running my fingers through his hair.

“Yes! I’mma give it all to you,” I moaned staring down at him in anticipation as he wore a mischievous smirk as my body trembled.

“Well, let me open up my first Christmas present then,” he whispered as his head disappeared between my thighs.

@reci24 @southerngirl41 @vebner37 @jeyusos-girl

@melaninsugababy @romanreignkisser @bebesobrielo

@arination99 @2-muchsauce @bakugoumarianawrites

@empressdede @alyyaanna @christinabae @anonandwannakeepitthatway @venusesworld @jeyusosgirl  @theninthwonder @mya2real  @justazzi @whatdoeseverybodywant @reignsboy19 wooahmiri alichesmi pytbgeezy

[sassypossumm]

It Happened One Night: Tequila and Bourbon

(Part 1) (Part 2)

The alarm on your phone went off, shaking you out of a deep sleep. So, you flung it across the room.

Your head began pounding, and breathing seemed too loud. Groaning, you tried to roll over and go back to sleep, but the churning nausea rolling through your gut would not be ignored. Flinging the covers aside you staggered to your feet.

Funny, your slippers weren't where you'd left them. Before you could ponder that quandary further, your stomach roiled again, sending you running, or more likely dragging your half dead carcass to the bathroom. 

Lifting the toilet lid, you dropped to the ground and wretched into the bowl. And then again. Resting your cheek on the rim of the toilet bowl, you closed your eyes and hugged the porcelain like a lifeline. 

"I feel like an extra in the Walking Dead." You moaned to no one in particular. At that moment you didn't care if it wasn't 'socially acceptable to talk to yourself'. You felt like shit, and if you wanted to complain to yourself, by George, you jolly well would.

Again, your stomach churned, and you again wretched over the bowl. Your body was shaking at this point, and a few tears slid down your cheeks from the exertion. 

Unbeknownst to you, you hadn't been the only party in bed, and said party was just stirring awake. And suffice it to say, he didn't look much better than you.

Miguel rolled over, sprawling across the bed and raised his head when his fingers felt the warm spot that had clearly been occupied recently. With some effort, he pulled himself up and cradled his head in his hands. 

Usually, he could handle his alcohol, but not this morning. While his stomach wasn't roiling like yours, he did have a splitting headache, and the overwhelming need to take a piss. Peeling back the covers slowly, Miguel rolled out of the bed and stretched, moaning in relief when his back made an audible cracking sound. 

"Getting old, O'Hara." He muttered to himself, running a hand raggedly through his hair. Pulling on his t-shirt, Miguel shuffled to the bathroom, stretching out his arms and yawning loudly. He felt as shitty as you but considering that the last six months of his life had been one long shit fest, this had become the norm.

They hadn't called it retirement, when Jess and Peter had suggested he take a break. No, of course not. Just... a break. It was of little consequence to him, in his mind Miguel had been put out to pasture like so much cattle, and he resented it. So how did he express that resentment?

By scarfing down cold empanadas and watching whatever terrible Tela Novela was on television. Sometimes to mix things up, Lyla appeared sporadically with cheery little reminders that he had a back log of messages from Jess. Messages he was ignoring on purpose.  

Yawning yet again, Miguel stepped into the bathroom and dropped his boxers... only to be met with a piercing scream... which he returned with a startled cry of his own. 

The mating call of the idiots.

"You!" Both voices shouted in surprise. 

The events of the previous night... 

"You need to take a break man."

"What I'm hearing is that you're ousting me." Miguel had shot back.

"What? No!" Peter had tried to pat his shoulder, but Miguel was having none of it. Folding his arms, he glared at Peter and Jess.

"After everything I've done, I pulled this society together with my bare hands, not to mention I've kept the universes safe,"

"We've kept the spider verse safe. Miguel." Jess said pointedly, mirroring his stance, refusing to back down. "We took down Spot as a team, Miguel. We saved countless lives as a team. And you seem to have forgotten that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Miguel reeled back at her insinuations. Jess looked almost regretful as she glanced at Peter and back at him gravely.

It means you're not God, Miguel, and you need a break."

"You okay, man?" The bartender's words cut through his bitter recollections.  

"Why shouldn't I be, okay? I'm a free man." He bit out the last words and held the drink up to the light. "You try to be a good man, take care of everybody and what does it get you?" Narrowing his eyes, he downed the bourbon and placed the glass on the counter with a 'thud'. "Cucked. Apparently, it gets you cucked." The bar tender shook his head and left Miguel to his misery. 

If only you'd done the same. But like they say, misery loves company. 

"Mind if I sit here?" Without waiting for an answer, you plopped onto the stool next to Miguel, and took a sip of your tequila. 

"It's a free country." He muttered without looking at you. Shrugging you turned to flag down the bar tender. 

"Tequila, please, a whole bottle." He raised a brow at your still half full glass, and you gave him a tight smile. "Go big or go home, right?" The bar tender slowly returned your grin and reached behind the counter for a bottle. 

"Here you go." 

"Thank you, my good sir." Sliding a wad of bills, you'd won in a slot machine across the counter, you topped off your glass and glanced again at Miguel. "I see we seem to have the same mission tonight." 

"What?" He finally glanced at you, albeit through eyes that were growing glassy. You jutted your chin towards his half empty bottle of bourbon. 

"Getting swacked. Seems to be the theme of the night." Miguel shrugged and turned his attention back to his drink. "I've never actually gotten properly drunk before, figure," Shrugging, you take a drink straight from the bottle. "What the hay, break up with a shitty guy, might as well get wasted." You bit out the last words and took another swig.  

"Are you always this chatty when you drink?" He grumbled, turning again to glance at you and his eyes narrowed. "The shitty guy, he did that?" Miguel's voice took on a dangerous edge as he gestured to a deep purple bruise near your left eye. Humming, you shrugged nonchalantly and squinted to read the label on the bottle. 

"That's nothing, you should've seen the going away present I gave him." 

"What'd you do?" Miguel turned to face you, leaning against the bar, interest piqued. You chuckled darkly and took another swig. 

"Cuffed him in the jaw with a shovel." A twisted grin ghosted over your face before it fell, and you took another drink. "Hope he's not dead. The shit's not worth my time in prison." You grumbled. Alcohol made your tongue loose and lowered your inhibition, which was why you rarely drank. Miguel snorted and took another drink of his bourbon. Refilling the glass, he looked at you again, a healthy dose of respect in his eyes. 

Your eyes flit to the shot glass of tequila you'd abandoned. "Haste makes waste, or whatever it is they say." You muttered, downing the shot. By that point, you felt that warm hazy sensation overtaking your body, and whatever decision-making skills you possessed where swiftly being ignored in favor of instinct.

Taking note of the jukebox in the corner, your ears perked up as you recognized the song. Seven Spanish Angels. It'd been a favorite of your fathers. Miguel noticed the tears pricking at your eyes, and he raised a brow. 

"You, okay?" Wiping your nose with the back of your forearm, you shook your head and sniffed. 

"No. But who is, right?" He couldn't argue with that. "That is..." Squeezing your eyes shut, you swallowed hard. "Was my dad's favorite song." Miguel's eyes softened, and he topped off your shot glass with some of his bourbon. "Thanks." You smiled weakly at him. 

"Don't mention it." He said gruffly, refilling his own glass, emptying the bottle. You downed the shot and put the glass on the counter none too gently. "I'm not one to preach to the choir, but you might want to pace yourself." 

"I might not be Paul Bunyon, mister, but I can hold my liquor."  

"Paul Bunyon?" His lips quirked. "Am I supposed to know who that is?" You brushed off his snide tone and sighed heavily, gesticulating dramatically with your hand. 

"A giant lumber jack with a giant blue ox." 

"And I remind you of this, giant lumber jack?" Miguel said bemusedly, with a raised brow.  

"I'll bet you'd swing an ax, real pretty, mister." Giving him a sly once over, you leaned an elbow on the counter and propped your chin in your hand. Miguel felt a distinctive heat prickle across his neck, and he coughed.

That should've been the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. But with the subtle twang surfacing in your voice, and the almost hungry way you were staring at him, Miguel struggled to find it anything other than positively erotic.

"In case you were wondering," His breath stalled when you scooted closer and looked into his eyes with an exaggerated sense of gravitas. "I am objectifying you to a disgusting degree." A tingle slithered down his spine and curled around his tail bone, and he released a shuddering breath. 

Present Morning...

Getting your bearings, you dragged yourself to your feet and sat on the edge of the bathtub, head in your hands. 

"I have so many questions..." Glancing up you saw Miguel pacing, boxers still around his ankles. So, he wasn't so much pacing as he was waddling. There was so much to take in all at once, but you shook your head and shielded your eyes. Now isn't the time to be getting horny you idiot. You grumbled to yourself. "Please put that thing away."  

"Thing?" Miguel paused midstride and glanced down. Looking up, he noticed your attempts to block your vision and smirked. "You don't like what you see?" He said, propping his hands on his hips cockily, seemingly forgetting the circumstances at hand.  

"That's hardly the point right now!" You sputtered and groaned when a splitting pain shot through your skull. Miguel rolled his eyes and pulled up his boxers. 

"I'm not naked anymore." Tentatively you peeked between your fingers and dropped your hand, looking up at him. 

"You look like shit." The words were out of your mouth before you could stop them. Miguel smirked. 

"You're not exactly sleeping beauty yourself." You felt your face flush, but you couldn't argue. It didn't take a mirror for you to know how you must look. Your stomach roiled again, and you flung yourself over the toilet bowl and wretched.

Miguel held back your hair. You shuddered violently and pulled back, wiping away tears and filmy residue. Miguel's eyes softened at your vulnerable state, and he helped you gently to your feet. 

"Thanks." You rasped. Miguel's brows furrowed, and he seemed to be studying you. Tilting your head back, your expression mirrored his own. "What, hey!" You squeaked in surprise when he hoisted you up by the waist and sat you on the counter by the sink. Without a second glance at you, he turned on the water and rifled through the drawers for a wash cloth. "What are you doing?" You watched him, curiosity piqued.

"Your face is disgusting." He said simply, lathering up the wash cloth he'd found. 

"Gee, thanks a lump." You muttered, folding your arms. 

"You know what I mean." He sighed and squeezed the excess water out of the soapy cloth. You reached to take the cloth, but he pulled it back and narrowed his eyes at you. "What do you think you're doing?" You blinked at him, confusedly. 

"Wash my face?"  

"I'll do it." 

"I'm perfectly capable of washing my own," 

"I said, I'll do it." He cut off your protest firmly, tilting your face up. You opened your mouth to protest, but at his glower, you closed your mouth. Satisfied, Miguel gently washed your face with the cloth. Up close, you had a chance to admire anew just how good looking he was. No, good looking was an understatement.

This man was the stuff of Michaelangelo's wet dreams. Oh, to be a sculptor. You thought, wryly, tracking the subtle twitch of his eyebrow and the way the muscles ticked in his jaw as he focused. His eyes locked on yours, and you glanced away, flushing. 

"You weren't this shy last night." Miguels lips twitched, but his tone remained neutral. And for some reason, that made it all the hotter. Your eyes flit to his momentarily, and at the shit eating grin that spread across his face, you huffed. 

"Asshole." You grumbled, folding your arms. Miguel simply grunted, good naturedly and rinsed the rag before wiping the soap off your face. "I don't remember very much about last night." You admitted when he finally pulled back, giving you breathing room again. 

"And I seem to remember even less." He said, tossing the cloth in the hamper. 

"I guess we both got pretty swacked last night." You groaned, rubbing your temples thoughtfully. "I don't even think I caught your name." You breathed, looking up at him slowly, shame flushing your face. Miguel folded his arms and leaned against the bathroom wall. 

"Miguel O'Hara." Were you not actively fighting to tamp down a rising waive of panic, the subtle accent that rolled off his tongue with the words would've had goose bumps prickling your skin. Pinching the bridge of your nose, you sighed heavily. 

"All things considered, you're taking this really well, Miguel O'Hara." You glanced up to catch his shrugging his shoulders. 

"As you so eloquently put it, we got 'swacked', is it? And it seems evident to me that we hooked up." You were taken aback by his cool demeanor. 

"Oh, is that so evident to you, Mister Smarty Pants?" Narrowing your eyes, you jumped off the counter, and immediately stumbled. Miguel reached out and caught you before you fell. 

"Mujercita espinosa." He grumbled, wrapping an arm supportively around your waist. 

"I don't think I want to know what you just called me." You groused as he slowly led you back into the bedroom and gingerly helped you perch on the edge of the bed. Fighting through another wave of nausea, you placed your head between your knees and groaned. "Just let me die." You moaned loudly. 

"You might really want to when I tell you where we are..." Miguel sounded genuinely concerned. 

"Oh, yeah, why's that?" Opening your eyes, you turned your head and saw Miguel standing tensely by the window. Feeling the blood pounding in your head, you slowly sat up. "Might as well tell me what other piss poor decision we made last night, where are we?" Miguel glanced at you warily. "Miguel... where are we?" Narrowing your eyes, your tone grew firmer.

He sighed and pulled the curtain further aside, looking again out the window. In the next tense moment of silence, your eyes fell on a sheet of paper sticking out from under the lamp on the nightstand and reached for it curiously. 

As you read the paper, your heart dropped. You didn't need him to tell you where you were. A marriage license. With the proud country of Mexico stamped at the top. 

"I think I'm going to be sick..." You struggled to breath, and dropping the paper to the bed, you curled in on yourself and began hyperventilating. Crossing the room, he started to reach for you, but froze when his eyes landed on the paper. 

"Mierda." He muttered under his breath, as he scanned the writing. He recognized his handwriting, and the accompanying signature he attributed to you. At least he had a name to go with your face now. 

And a wife to go along with it, cabrón."  He thought bitterly, dropping the paper on the nightstand. Tempted to give in to his familiar spiral of self-loathing, but paused when he looked down at you. You'd curled up like an armadillo and were shaking like a leaf.

His heart crumpled at the sight. He couldn't be selfish, you clearly needed him to be the stable one right now. Running a hand through his hair, he took a ragged breath and sat heavily next to you. 

"Hey." He rested a hand in the center of your back, causing you to tense. After several minutes of his soothing strokes up and down your back, you started to uncurl yourself. "You, okay?" He whispered gently when you finally sat up and crossed your legs. Breathing out a shaky laugh, you ran shaky fingers through your hair, and glanced at him with slightly wild eyes. 

"Not even a little bit." You said, shakily. Miguel could only nod, his own mind trying to wrap around the overload of information. Moaning, you flopped back on the bed again. "I'd always assumed I'd get married, but this is ridiculous!" Not that he didn't agree with you, but for some reason, his ego still stung at your caustic tone. 

"It's certainly not ideal." He said tentatively. You shot up and looked at him, eyes panicky. 

"Not ideal. Not ideal. He says!" Sensing you were going into another spiral, Miguel took your face in his hands, gently but firmly and turned your head. 

"Hey, look at me." The authority in his voice caught your attention, and you narrowed in on him, breath still rapid and shallow. Miguel leaned closer and looked intently into your eyes, his voice never wavering. "This is going to be okay."

You began sputtering, but he simply shifted a hand so he could place his thumb gently over your lips. Your eyes widened at the motion, and you glanced from his thumb back to his eyes. Had they been that startling russet hue last night? You couldn't remember. 

Just like you can't remember anything else, you dodo. You thought bitterly. You felt the rough pad of his thumb grazing softly over your bottom lip. The combinations of that sensation and his deep voice whispering your name, brought your thoughts to a screeching halt, and you couldn't do anything but stare at him. 

"Are you with me?" He said a bit louder, and said your name again, more pointedly. You nodded as best as you could with his hands keeping you so firmly in place. Taking a deep breath, he let his hands slacken a bit and you took a bracing breath.

He looked back into your eyes. "This is a shitty situation, and I've got a splitting headache, but it's going to be okay, I promise." Your heart stuttered at his firm tone, and searching his eyes, you found that you believed him. 

"I believe you." You choked out. His eyes widened, and you saw his pupils dilate and retract before he released your face and leaned back. Releasing a breath you hadn't realized you'd been holding in, you studied this perfect stranger, this... husband, more intently.

Something about him made you want to believe him. Made you want to believe that if there was a monster in the closet, he'd vanquish it. Made you want to believe that he'd slay a dragon if it meant keeping you safe. 

Wishful thinking. You shook your head, clearing out the fanciful thoughts. He was just a man, like any other man. And men failed. You were certain, Miguel O'Hara wouldn't prove to be the exception. But, for some reason, on this one thing... you had no qualms about putting trust in him. When he said this would be okay, you knew it would. 

"What are we going to do?" You gave voice to the nagging question, flopping back on the bed. You bounced a little when Miguel's heavy back hit the mattress. After several minutes of silence, you turned your head and saw him staring intently at the ceiling.

"Miguel?" He hummed. "What are we going to do?" A muscle ticked in his jaw, and slowly, he turned his head to meet your eyes. 

"My lawyer is in Nueva York. We'll fly back, and he'll look over the license. He can tell us if it's legally binding or not." 

"And if it is?" You pressed, raising a brow. Miguel breathed out through his nose, and he shrugged. 

"Then, we'll cross that bridge when we reach it." 

@feyhunter78 (figured out how to tag!!!)

By the by, I AM open to suggestions about where we can take these two idiots in the future! Kinda wanna try to actually have some follow through and develop a full fledged plot for once!

[ellaa-writes]

The Beast Within

author note: Part 7, part 6 here. 2k words. Kind of a filler chapter but I'm building up for something. Thanks for all the support on the last part and my other fics. Means so much and has given me a boost of confidence to start writing again. Good Dog 3 coming soon! Also part 2 to the Roommate fic. Any ideas or requests are welcomed, Enjoy :) masterlist

summary: Omegas are rare, in a world full of Alphas and Betas. Being a Omega was not only dangerous but they were highly sought after. After living your life has a Beta in disguise, you meet a scary Alpha, but not any normal alpha. But a gaint Apex Alpha who won't stop at anything to make you his.

tags: Alternative Universe. Female Reader, A/b/o dynamics. Mean Konig is back. Roze is a "doctor" in this. Mentions of dead bodies, blood, violence. Reader has had enough and does something drastic. Vomit and other bodily fluids. Not proof read.

Following around the Russian has been nothing more than annoying. Watching the slimy bastard eat his dinner and fuck his whores. Nothing solid just yet, it's been a nonstop week of tailing him.

Your calls stopped coming in, but he did arrange for a friend to stop by. Make sure you are eating and taking care of yourself. And also for some socialization.

Every time you try to leave the house he gets notified by the guards standing by. Every mean and nasty word you say to them. All logged into a file, a little proud of your fierceness against the Betas.

König was getting restless himself, currently taking a break while Simon stalked Makarov. Keeping him informed on his every move. They needed more evidence, more of a reason to tamp him out other than some gossip.

König avoided checking the security cameras, expecting the house to be a shit storm. On one of his excursions following Makarov he stopped in a jewelry store. Picking out a beautiful diamond necklace, planning on using it as some sort of collar.

It was late enough into the night that you should be in bed. Or asleep somewhere, from the logs it seems you've been using the livingroom as your central station. Anytime one of the Beta guards enter the house you scream and snarl until they leave.

Making notes for himself to start your training soon as he got back. He's hoping just another week, if not two.

On the other hand you have completely lost your mind.

The house in disarray, you pulled open every drawer and cabinet in the house. Throwing the contains on the floor, you weren't internally sure what you were looking for.

The days rolled on and you slowly began losing faith. You stopped contacting König all together, declaring that if he is dead that it was good riddance. You can got back to your normal life.

Maybe you would even get a pay out, some sort of compensation for a lost mate. Those being rare but still happen. Some even being lavished in luxury, true freedom you thought.

After waking from one of your many anger induced naps you found yourself at the dammed wooden door. Willing it to unlock and burst open.

Leaving the dark hallway and finding the tool kit stashed away in the laundry room. You dragged the kit into the living area and towards the direction of the door. Not really sure what the plan is.

You tried every screwdriver you could find to try and pry the lock off the damn thing. Even using a few hammers to bang on the knob it's self. The only progress you made was loosening the knob and creating a bunch of scratches and dents.

A ding and knock echoed through the home. Making you jump back from your work, causing you to hastily stuff the tools back into the box and slide it into a random closet. You nearly ran to the door, peaking through the peep hole.

A brown headed women stood in front of the door, a guard at her left as she waited for you.

Hesitantly you undid every lock and latch, doing them up after getting frustrated at the spies checking in on you.

You swung the door open, staring the women down. She was dressed fairly professional, she carried a small bag at her side whole the guard held a few other larger bags.

"Oh Hi. You must be the Omega." she gave you a bright smile. It warmed up your cold heart, spreading through your bones.

"How are you?" your voice came out almost sheepish. "What are you doing here?" you followed a little more confidently. Standing your ground, wanting answers before you let this strange women into your home, well König home.

"Did he not tell you?" she asked concerned, turning to look at the guard to her side who shook his head no.

"I swear he's always been horrible with communication. I apologize on his behalf you sweet thing." she held the small bag up to your face. "I brought pastries." you could smell the delicious sweetness through the bag.

"You can call me Dr. Roze." you grabbed the bag and stepped to the side. Allowing her in but stopping the guard. "It's ok Angelo. You can leave the bags at the door. Don't want to upset the Omega." the guard froze, looking at you with worry before he dropped the bags on the floor and closed the door behind him.

"Sorry for the sudden intrusion like this." Dr. Roze spoke, looking around at the state of the house. You felt a tad embarrassed, pushing a pile of papers and junk off to the side as you say at the kitchen bar. Pulling out the Danish and muffins.

"Have you been eating? König called concerned you've been neglecting yourself." she turned to you, watching as you chewed and swallowed the treat.

It hit heavy in your stomach, the same feeling of anger and distrust eating it whole.

"You talked to him? He's alive?" you felt a little disappointed. Having convinced yourself he died, but now coming to the realization that he has been ignoring you.

All the days you've cried for him, his touch and scent. You completely lost your appetite, shoving the treats into the trash and slamming in closed.

"Yes dear. As he not keep contact?" she regarded you with concern.

"No." you spat. Suddenly becoming hostile to this strange women. A women who your Alpha would rather talk to than you.

"I think you should leave." you forcibly said. Moving further away from the women. You could feel the anger rising in you.

"I don't think that's a good thing right now. You are in destress and that's not good for the pup." she tried to approach you but you nearly tripped over your feet getting away from her.

You couldn't stop the tears from falling, the way your chest tightened, the way your small breakfast what's to come up. You rush around the other side of the big island and too the guest bathroom. Spilling your stomach into the porcelain sink.

Dr. Roze keeping her distance but following suit. Pulling your hair out of your face as she turns the water on. Letting the cold water drip into the back of your neck.

"Deep breaths now, come on. In through your nose and out through your mouth. Just like that, good omega. Good." she cooed to you. Allowing her to help you.

She managed to calm you down, now sitting in the large tub filled up to your shoulders. You had your knees pulled to your chest, resting your chin on top.

You could hear Dr. Roze cleaning up the house. You also smelt something yummy cooking away. Still unsure how to feel about the situation. You wanted to hate her. Why her. Why not you.

Shaking your head to rid you of those thoughts. Deciding you were done soaking, draining the tub as you dried off and pulled your thickest and fluffiest robe on. You sat on the end of the bed, the bed you haven't laid on since the day König left.

That bastard.

It still smelt like him, the whole room smelt like him. It made your feel warm inside but also made you want to throw up again. After a few long moments you got dressed and made your way back to Dr. Roze.

Stopping before you entered the living area, you could hear her hushed yelling. She must be on the phone, she sounds pretty mad.

Finally emerging, she gave you one of her warm smiles and abruptly hung the phone up.

"Why don't we go for a walk?" she chirped. The idea of going outside, beyond the patios. You jumped at the opportunity, digging out your comfortable shoes from the coat closet and pulling on your favorite sweater.

"Are you sure.... That I can?" you questioned warily. Anytime you tried leaving the place you were marched back in. "Don't worry about it honey." she guided you out of the house, waiting in the hallway for the elevator. You've never been more excited, even though you still don't know this women. She could be leading you to your death but long as it happened out of that penthouse.

"When was the last time you just, you know, walked around." Dr. Roze kept with your pace, which was slow. "The night I met König. Which about about 2 months ago now. Wait 3 actually. Time moves differently when your stuck inside all the time." the weather was a tad chilly but you enjoyed it.

Dr. Roze just hummed beside you, letting you to continue in silence. After a few silence moments you can hear her phone buzzing. But she ignored it the first few times before finally digging it out and answering the call.

You could hear a deep angry voice in the other end. Slowing down and coming to a stop when Dr. Roze hung the phone up.

"I think it's time for us to head back, shall we? Maybe we can try to eat again." she turned to start going towards the way your came from.

"Are you really a Doctor?" you asked as you caught up to her. "Of course dear." she looked at your side ways.

"So what you said was true. That I'm... you know." you trailed off not wanting to say it out loud.

"You didn't know?" she asked, genuinely shocked. "You couldn't smell it? I did soon as you opened the door." she finished nonchalantly.

You just shook your head, your mind when to the lump of cells forming in your womb. Your would be wrapping right now if she had anymore to give.

Dr. Roze's phone never stopped buzzing but you both with ignored it on the walk to the penthouse.

Once inside the lobby waiting for the elevator you turned to Dr. Roze with a fake big smile. "It was really nice meeting you, I wish not see you again." it came out flat, your smile not reaching you eyes.

The doors opened you entered, pushing the close door option. Watching as Dr. Roze stared at you belligerently while the doors slid close.

You marched past the on duty guards, unlocking the door to your home. Slamming it closed behind you.

König knew he shouldn't have trusted that wretched women. Telling him he shouldn't have his doll locked up, under supervision. And then repeatedly violating his commands and than ignoring him.

He watched as his Omega entered the home by herself, disappearing towards the bedroom.

His phone buzzed, Roze, spitting in disgust he brought the device to his ear.

"Speak." he barked, hearing her breathing in the other end.

"You sure know how to pick them." her unamused voice carried through. "She doesn't want to talk to me. Locking herself back in that cage you call a home." she spat back

"I don't need your service anymore, your to incompetent." König was watching the screen, you've been out of sight for some time. Wishing he installed one in the bedroom, but knowing he treasures his privacy as well.

"You can't keep her-" the annoying women started but König cut her off. "I'm not repeating myself. Now make yourself scarces." he was the one to hang up the phone now.

Tossing it to the side, Makarov groaning in the distance. Simon was patiently waiting, keep the bastard alive just enough to get everything they needed from him.

His boots echoed throughout the empty factory, bodies scattered around. The smell of crimson heavy in the air.

"Now back to you." he purred out, his fist connecting to the side of the Russians face. "Do we have an agreement? Or do I have to show you again?" König motioned for Simon but the Russian spoke first.

"No, no! I understand." he said through the blood dripping out of his mouth. Simon grabbed his hair to the scalp, yanking back so he could make eye contact with him. "Where's your manners?" he growled down at the bleeding man.

"I understand my Alpha." Makarov coughed out, his broken face shining in the dim light. The Beast smiled down at him this time "Pack him up dog, make sure he finds his way home." König dismissed them. Watching as Simon dragged the man out of the building.

Finally some peace he thought, until his phone began going off back on the desk. It was his alarm, the one he installed on his desk. Opening up the cameras on the laptop König watched has his little Omega stood at his desk. The door in shambles and a sledge hammer leaning against the frame.

Getting the door open was the hardest part, using the flat head screw driver to pry open the desk was easy. Searching to contents, scattering them around the oak desk. Scanning through documents after documents about things you didn't understand.

You began rummaging around different files, nothing made sense to you. Just a bunch of numbers and dates. Not until you came across a file with pictures, but not just any pictures.

Bodies, all dead. In all stages of decay, some fresh. Some cut open and others still alive, well half alive. Your mouth hung agape as you looked through them all. Why would König have these? Are they evidence? Are they even his?

Who is he?

Tag list: @plumdreadful @traumaramacenter @kaylp-godly @napalmfairy7 @hisa-plush @ramblingsofachaoticthinker @winters-doll @joyfulfxckery @purebeskar @collete25 @fandomsinthegalaxies @jamieelol @luc1ddreamersatnight @cringeycookies @whiskytoast @kit-williams @lyc0risequin0x

[lycanlupins]

┌─ “ „ EYES LIKE SKY ─┐

Roy Harper x F!Reader - Chapter 1

Cam Girl Au! [+18]

Sex toys, D&S elements, controlled orgasm, pet names

AN: im kinda back?? idk im trying this out because i really like writing again 🥹 lmk if y’all like this!! remember to like + rb + leave a comment if you enjoyed it!! Anyways, enjoy Chapter 1!!

You heard a familiar ping come from your laptop, a sign that everything was up and working on your end.

“Great…” you sigh and roll your eyes, “Time for another show.” You’re a cam girl, and a pretty successful one at that, but it never failed to make you rethink your career path when you logged in at the same time every night like clockwork. You didn’t have a specialty so to speak but you did have a specific clientele, so you did what you do best; angle your camera, adjust your lingerie and press the glaring red go live button to start your show.

[r0binhood]: how’s our favorite girl?

[seraphicsiren]: tired, been pretty low energy lately but i’m ready to please as always!

Your number one fan, r0binhood, was finally there and that meant you’d be taking home at least $100 that night.

[r0binhood]: good, hopefully that means you have all of your toys charged ;)

Gag. He was probably some creep in his 50’s, rubbing one out on his wrinkly cock while you talk him through it but fuck it, his money was a nice cushion while you got back on your feet at the new apartment you were renting.

“Hi boys, let’s start shall we?” You purred, pushing the straps of your nightgown down ever so slowly just to tease your viewers. Suddenly you hear a familiar notification, your first tip of the night. A few tokens here and there from desperate men trying to get your attention but you knew better. You knew if you wanted the real money, you would wait for him.

r0binhood has sent you 50 tokens.

There it is. You push down your nightgown, exposing the lacey bra underneath, a slew of tips flooding your notifications once more. They never got to see your face, it was your one rule, and it kept the mystery alive for them. You won’t have a breach of privacy and they can imagine you look like their wildest, wettest dreams.

[r0binhood]: private show?

[seraphicsiren]: you know the rules, private shows are 500 an hour.

He wouldn’t, you knew better than to expect a man to buy that sort of time on one of your shows. Sure, you may make a few hundred per show along with your other forms of income but a private show? In your dreams. You were asking $25 an hour for your time, it wasn’t much but most men would tune out then and there.

r0binhood bought a private show.

The screen went blank, no notifications to be had and then an empty chat popped up.

[r0binhood]: hi princess. just thought i’d spoil myself and see what you can do for me with the time we have here.

You were used to entertaining multiple men, and sometimes others, at the best of times on your streams. This was scary, this was something you were completely foreign to.

[seraphicsiren]: you have an hour of my time to tell me to do whatever it is you’d like. my attention is all on you.

Your hands were shaking, sweaty, and clammy at the thought of performing for one person. You had been intimate in the past, that wasn’t the issue, he was paying for you to please him this time. And while yes, you knew what he liked more or less, he was still someone completely stranger to you.

[r0binhood]: why don’t you start off with the bullet, don’t take anything off, just use the bullet on yourself.

You grabbed the compact vibrator from your nightstand, flipping the switch to the on position as it came to life with a whirring sound. Most often than not, you were in control of the speed and rhythm, but tonight he had tricks up his sleeve.

r0binhood redeemed 300 tokens for bullet control.

Shit. You begrudgingly sent the link for a 10 minute session on your vibrator.

[seraphicsiren]: use those 10 minutes wisely

[r0binhood]: i’ll only need 5

An immediate slow vibration started against your clit, sending a wave of pleasure through your nerves.

“Fuck…” you moan under your breath. Usually men like him would spend their 10 minutes of control on the highest setting, they never knew what you liked. They thought all women must like a high intensity session when it just felt boring to you, but you faked orgasm after orgasm when they were in control to make them feel better.

Not this time. No, this man knew what he was doing, he slowly upped the intensity until he heard that hitch in your breathing, the one that indicated that it must have felt good.

“Mmnh…that feels so good, christ…” you lolled your head back, rutting against the vibrator and a pillow under you for better friction. He must have noticed the way you were reacting because he immediately switched up the intensity for a split second to grab your attention.

[r0binhood]: needed your attention sweetheart, i want your eyes on me, i want to watch you come undone.

This man… he commanded his attention, and he commanded it well. Why was this man behind the screen making you feel horny for some god forsaken reason? Was it the dominance? The control he had over you at this moment? Fuck it, you didn’t care, it just felt so damn good.

Another minute passed before he grew bored of the intensity, turning it up a setting or two.

“Shit!” You squeaked, panting like a dog at the feeling between your legs. You were soaking, dripping all over your pretty red sheets and pillows, grinding down for some semblance of friction against your puffy, needy cunt.

Soon enough, the setting he was at was beginning to make you see stars. Babbling nonsense and a string of curses as you kept humping your pillow like a horny teen until—

“SHITSHITSHIT!” You felt that tight coil in your stomach pop, squirting all over your sheets and everything within a small distance of you. You wanted to collapse, you could feel your legs turn to jelly as you tried to crawl back to your laptop.

[seraphicsiren]: 5 minutes…left…

You knew he was chuckling behind his screen, because how the fuck did he get you to squirt on camera with just him in control.

[r0binhood]: i’ll let you be for tonight, here’s the rest of my tokens. i’ll be back tomorrow night if you’re online. see ya princess.

r0binhood tipped 1000 tokens.

Not long afterwards you ended your stream, too spent and shocked to continue for the night. You shut your laptop, cleaned your bed and made a beeline for your kitchen.

“How the fuck did he do that…” you racked your brain for the amount of times you had actually cum on stream. You could count the times on one hand and now make that two hands. You were still throbbing, rubbing your legs together while you washed some dishes in your sink. You never noticed the window in your kitchen was facing another occupied apartment until just now.

“Huh…wonder who lives there.” You watch the light from their tv flicker different colors. Suddenly you see movement, someone getting closer to the window. Holy fuck.

He looks directly at you, a smile wide on his face as he waves and opens his window. You were awestruck for a moment, he was gorgeous. Not in a model way but something different. He was rugged and manly but still somehow read as boyish. After a few moments you join him in opening your window, leaning out ever so slightly.

“Hi! I’m Roy, nice to see a friendly face across the way for once!” He shouted.

“I’m Y/N, I’m guessing this place was empty for a bit?”

“Yeah, this isn’t really the nicest building around but it's got charm! What do you say we meet for coffee sometime? I haven’t met anyone around my age in forever.”

“Yeah! How does tomorrow morning sound?”

He smiles a toothy grin. God he was cute, missing a tooth by his right canine and light ginger stubble littered his chin. He nodded while you were busy taking in every feature of his face and he chuckled.

“Hey, get some sleep, you look out of it.” He shook his head, still smiling from ear to ear. You couldn’t tell if you were throbbing from the mind numbing orgasm you had earlier or if his kind smile had your brain in a tizzy, either way you needed to take care of that feeling before bed. You finished up dishes in the kitchen, closed your window and headed straight for the cum soaked bed.

You were honestly too tired and too horny to care so you grabbed the nearest towel and dropped it on top of your sheets. You could worry about that in the morning, right now you needed sweet relief. And with your final spur of energy you grabbed your dildo and got right to work at the thought of that hot ginger across the hall.

➸➸➸

[oneoftheextras]

masterlist | got a request?

paring: luis serra x gn!reader

request: “less than 1,000? hmmmm….perhaps a super sweet domestic morning drabble with Luis and the reader?"

words: 994 (under 1k lets gooo)

'warnings': gender neutral reader, fluff, slight flirting

want a handwritten letter from a character?

"5 more minutes..." Luis groaned, the natural timbre of his voice deeper than usual due to the untimely disturbance of his sleep.

His arm was curled around your waist as he held you against his chest, the short coarse hair of his stubble prickling your bare shoulder.

"I can't!" you attempted to wiggle out of his grip the way you had been for at least the last 30 minutes, "I have to work," you aimed to bargain with a man who had decided your time was better spent cuddling.

When you started to slip from his grasp he held on tighter, pulling you back into him and nuzzling his face into your neck.

"Luis, please-" you whined with a lint of a giggle, "-you work from home, that means you can stay in bed with me all day." Luis' voice was slightly muffled due to his mouth being smoothed against your skin.

Your alarm sounded for a second time - your final snooze warning. "Seriously, I have to get up," you nudged him away from you and he reluctantly let go.

For as dramatic as he was being, he knew that he couldn't make you late to logging in for your shift.

You gave him a quick kiss on the forehead and slipped out of the covers, his arm that was draped over you falling softly onto the mattress that was still warm from your presence.

"It is torture to be without you, mi amor," his voice holding a lint of sarcasm as he veiled his forehead with his arm, mimicking a damsel in distress.

The eye roll you gave him was paired with a smile that only he could bring out of you, "I'm sure you'll survive," was the last comment you got in before you entered the bathroom.

Although he was out of your sight you still heard the faint call of "I'm not sure, I think it might be fatal," from the bedroom. You shook your head at his theatrics and turned the faucet of the shower towards you, and finding the perfect temperature to start your morning routine.

Despite being, quite literally, held back; you weren't running late for work which surprised you. With the scent of your body wash fresh on your skin you descended the creaky stairs of your home, now full dressed and ready for the day, with the location of the kitchen counter in your mind as your workstation.

The moment you stepped into the room; the cold of the stone flooring seeping through your socks and ambushing your feet that longed for the absent warmth of the shower again; the waft of breakfast hit your senses.

With the morning sun creeping through the large windows and creating a warm orange glow in the otherwise bright room, you saw Luis: standing over the stove in nothing but his socks and a frilly red apron you had bought him last Christmas.

"Ah there's the love of my life," he turned his head towards you slightly without taking his eyes off of what he was cooking, the cigarette that was wedged behind his ear swayed from the movement.

The surprise of seeing him out of bed had worn off and you were able to sit down at the counter and open your laptop. Unfortunately, the way your kitchen had been built meant that you had to have your back to him, but you could still hear him working away behind you.

"In the mood to break health codes today, are we?" you tease at his nakedness, "What can I say? You make me want to misbehave," he quipped, and you didn't need to be looking at him to know he was wiggling his eyebrows and giving you a cheeky grin.

It's a good thing you didn't turn to face him because suddenly his lips were against your temple and a mug of coffee was being gently placed down on the counter, next to your laptop that was slowly waking up.

As he retracted his head to continue what he was doing, you swivelled on your seat so you could watch him.

"You're in a good mood this morning," you commented, shamelessly admiring him as he worked. "Despite being so rudely awakened as well!" he opened his mouth after he spoke to give you a dramatic shocked expression.

"What did you do? What's broken?" you folded your arms across your chest and waited for the devastating news he was about to deliver that would explain his behaviour.

"Only my heart at these painful accusations", he had started to plate up what he was cooking, but still managed to split his attention evenly between that and you.

You continued to stare at him as though he would buckle under your gaze and tell you everything, but he held strong.

He set down the plate in front of you and the smell hit you even more than before as the steam rose from the dish. "My favourite!" you exclaimed and looked at him with a happy grin.

He handed you your cutlery and gestured for you to eat - "What did I do to deserve this?" you asked, cutting into your breakfast.

He slipped his arms around your waist and rested his head into the crook of your neck, giving it a small kiss, "Just continuing to be the best thing in my life-" he pulled his arms away to let you eat, but made sure to give you another kiss on the top of your head "-I wanted to remind you of how much you mean to me,".

You were about to reply when a ding came from your computer, notifying you it join your morning meeting. Clicking 'join' you quickly put your hand over your camera, remembering that Luis was still only wearing an apron, you waved for him to move out of view - and you watched the man you love leave the room with a wink you'd come to adore.

taglist (this is old so pls let me know if you want to be removed / added):

@mylife-demonstrates-murphys-law @hereticpriest @enagmaticether @anxiousgoddest @kodzu-ken @moonnei @diesinspanishbcimhispanic  @fvckmeupyoonz @homosexualjohnwayne @notplutos @moth-baybee @answer-the-sirens @ochakoakabane

[unformula1]

you’ll stay? (LS2 x OP81)

logan’s life is hard but he’s got oscar. w/c: 651 day 29 of loscar posts until we get a loscar podium (series masterlist) masterlist

Logan has never felt more alone. He sits on his bed, the cold embrace of his blanket enveloping him. His tears slowly flow out, tracing his cheekbones, clinging onto his chin before falling onto the bed. His head is tucked between his two knees, soft sobs echo in his hotel room. 

He’s alone. 

A knock on his door forces Logan to sit up and wipe his tears off. As he walks toward the door, he checks the mirror, cleaning off any trace of him crying from his face. Logan takes a deep breath and puts on a smile.

He opens the door and comes face to face with Oscar.

“Hi Logs.” Oscar waves, he’s holding a bag.

“Hi Oscar.” Logan says after clearing out his throat, his voice comes out more hoarse than expected.

“I didn’t see you at the party. Alex was there!” Oscar says.

The party. Logan forgot if he got invited but he wasn’t planning on going anyway.

“I crashed.” Logan deadpans, “I’m not gonna go to a party.”

“Yea… my bad.” Oscar says before he lifts up the bag, “I brought some pastries, my grandmother made them. Thought you might be hungry.”

Logan stares blankly before taking the bag from Oscar, “Thank you.”

“Mind if I come in?” Oscar asks.

Logan looks back into his room and hesitates.

“I mean if you don’t want me to then I won’t…” Oscar’s voice trails off.

“Come in.” Logan says.

“Oh. Cool!” Oscar walks into the room and takes a seat on one of the chairs.

Logan closes the door and places the bag on the table before sitting down opposite Oscar on the edge of the bed.

“How have you been?” Oscar asks, then instantly regrets it, “Sorry, stupid question.”

“It’s okay.” Logan says, he doesn’t exactly want to converse right now, he sort of just wants to cry.

“So… life’s rough?” Oscar says, “Sorry. Stupid again, I’m not very good at this whole… conversing thing.” 

“It’s fine.” Logan says.

“Do you want me to help you with… anything? You could talk to me right now.” Oscar says.

Logan sighs, “I just need to cry right now.” He says before flopping back first onto his bed.

“Oh… are you okay if I stay?” 

Logan nods, not sure if Oscar could see but Oscar stayed where he was, so Logan assumed he saw the nod.

“If you want me to leave anytime just tell me.” Oscar says before sitting next to where Logan was lying down.

Logan usually would never cry in the presence of someone else, he had a facade to keep up. However, right now, Logan couldn’t care less.

When he crashed, the only faces he saw were disappointed ones. They only got more disappointed in him when Alex scored points. All of them shot Logan with wary eyes. Alex was disappointed in him. James was disappointed in him. All of them were.

He tried his best, he really did everything he could to get better but nothing paid off. His dreams were like flashing before his very eyes.

Logan stares into the ceiling.

“Are you disappointed in me?” Logan asks.

Oscar shakes his head, “No. I would never be.”

Logan lets out a soft scoff, “Sure…”

“Hey! I would never be disappointed in you.” Oscar says, patting Logan’s thigh, “I’m always proud of you.”

“I literally crashed today.” Logan says.

“Everyone makes mistakes.” Oscar shrugs.

“Clearly I make more than others.” Logan scoffs, mostly at himself.

“Well, I believe in you then, I believe that you’ll get better.” Oscar says.

Logan lets out another scoff disguised as a chuckle.

“Yea…right…” Logan says, as he feels his tears slowly filling his eyes.

“Shut up mate.” Oscar says, “You’re an amazing driver, you will get better.”

Logan smiles slightly but the tears continue to flow.

“I’ll stay with you, every step of the way. Okay.”

“Promise you’ll stay?”

“Promise.”

[lilbitdepressed27]

Alcina Dimitrescu/Fem!wolfreader

Warnings: none

WC: 1.9k

Authors note: this has been sitting in my drafts for quite a long time now and I just realized it was finished. Enjoy:)

*****

Now if you weren't injured you would have been able to turn back to your human form a few hours ago. But as soon as you lost the hunters. You had to fight off some wolf/human looking type of things. Now those things were terrifying and crazy strong. You had just finished fighting off the last one in your black wolf form. It was easy seeing as you stood tall over them and were way stronger.

Your wolf form was covered in some red stains from both the human wolf things and yours. You knew that staying around here wasn't a good idea so you kept moving. As you kept walking you saw a cabin, figuring that place would the best place to stay for the night, and for you to lick your wounds.

The cabin was closed tight until you found a door cracked open leading to the basement. So you went in there closing the door behind you the best you could with paws and mouth. Shaking off the water in your fur and making sure the basement was clear before you laid on the floor with an exhausted sigh. You still couldn't turn back to your human form and until then your wounds would be left uncleaned. You did the best you could with what you could do, you'd need human hands to clean these wounds out the correct way. You found a good place to lie down. Everything from before finally catching up to you

Before you could close your eyes and let the exhaustion take over, you heard a scream followed that was soon followed by a thud that came from upstairs. You knew you shouldn't have but something was telling you should go help whoever was being attacked. So you did. You gathered every ounce of strength you had left and ran up the stairs, bursting through the door. Only too see one of those wannabe wolf things on top of a red head girl in black robes. You felt this protectiveness overwhelm you as you bounced on the thing.

You bite off a chunk of the things neck. Fighting through the pain only thinking about killing this thing and protecting the red head behind you. It didn't take long to kill the thing after it fell lifelessly you huffed and turned around only to see the girl who looked to be seventeen or maybe sixteen shaking. You weren't sure if it was because of the cold or because she was scared. Or maybe it was both.

What did surprise you was her yellow eyes. Her eyes matching yours. You slowly walked closer but stopped as soon as she backed away. She was too weak to fight. You looked to the fire to see it fading. You walked to the fire adding more logs to it by mouth. Making the fire bigger. You picked up the blanket and made your way back to her but this time on your stomach. Hopefully showing her that you didn't mean any harm.

Seeing that she didn't react this time you threw the blanket over her, her shaking form obviously still cold. Your fur was dry by now, so you curled up behind her trying your best warm her up. She didn't fight it, letting it happen.

The both of you fell asleep next to the fire. One warmer than the other.

*

You had woken up to fingers running through your fur. Your body no longer in pain. Your wounds felt like they had been healed. The girl must have helped you. Your yellow eyes opened and were met by a giggle and yellow eyes looking at you with a smile. You had just realized how short the red head truly was. Your wolf form was a huge wolf standing at just nine feet tall. She had to be at least six feet.

"Thank you for saving me wolf."

You smiled, your tongue coming out as you leaned forward licking her face. She laughed as she tried to push you away.

"Get off my sister!!"

You had been caught off guard at the unexpected strength that threw you away from the red head.

"Daniela are you alright?"

"Cassandra! Bela! I'm fine leave her alone. She saved my life last night." Daniela said she stood up fast to stop her sisters from doing anything else. What was weird is that you felt the same protectiveness for her sisters as well. You just, couldn't understand why.

You stood up on your four feet standing tall next to Daniela. She smiled and patted your head. You looked at Cassandra and Bela, lowering your head and ears hopefully showing them that you didn't mean any harm to their sister or them. 

"Girls this is...we'll I don't know your name wolf. But these are my sisters Cassandra and Bela." Daniela pointed to each separately, making sure you didn't confuse the two.

"Mother is waiting for us. We must return back to the castle. Thank you wolf but we must leave, mother is worried about you Daniela." Cassandra spoke an over whelming filling of not wanting to leave you alone in this cabin.

"Come with us, mother would want to meet the one who saved her youngest child." Bela said as she stood in middle of her younger sisters. Your bright yellow eyes met hers. She along with her sisters stood shocked as your form changed from wolf to human. As a human you stood as tall as them maybe a few inches taller. But you also stood naked. Their cheeks turned a shy color of red as they looked away. Bela making work to look for clothes around the cabin.

"My name is Y/n." You offered a bright smile seeing as they weren't going to kill you. Bela handed what seemed to be a hoodie and a pair of shorts. You put them on and smiled.

"Thank you Y/n for saving me."

*

The walk to their home was uneventful. You had walked close to Daniela as she spoke to you. She told you on how she had never met a full wolf before. In wolf form your eyes were yellow but in human form they were the regular soft Y/EC color. The girls took noticed of that. They also took notice on how you were. You seemed so relaxed...they just couldn't put their finger on it. There was something about you that made them want to spend more time with you.

*

You were amazed at the size of the castle. The thing was huge. Biggest thing you've ever seen. You stayed quiet as the girls called out for their mother. You were too busy looking at a painting to pay attention to anything else. Your gaze stopped at a portrait. It was of Daniela and her sisters. They looked so young and different.

You turned around at the sound of a woman's voice. Your eyes widen at the sight of the very tall woman. She was beautiful, the way she spoke and you could see how she cared about her daughters. Her yellow eyes were just a color that took your breath away. When they connected with yours, they for sure took your breath away. When she stood up straight her eyes never leaving yours you didn't know how to act.

You realized that you should have been paying attention to what they were saying cause of the way she was looking at you. You didn't know how to act or what to say so you did the only thing you knew what to do.

You smiled up at the woman. "Hi."

You saw the the flash of surprise cross her beautiful features before they returned to a blank expression. "You are the lycan who saved my daughter." The voice sent chills down your spine, you felt your inner wolf just want to cuddle up to this woman.

"Lycan? No I'm a wolf. Well a full wolf not a wolf/human thing, not to be rude or anything but those things give me the creeps. I've never seen one of those things before so when I ran into some, they could have given me a heart attack." Realizing that you rambling you cleared your throat, feeling you cheeks warm up as you looked down at your bare feet. "Yes, it was the right thing to do ma'am."

"Fascinating little thing you are. I will show you my gratitude by giving you a place to stay." You simply nodded too tongue tied to say anything else. Your chest had felt tight since the moment you walked into the castle. It wasn't the type of tight that was painful. But the type of longing. You wanted nothing more than to pull the tall woman into your arms. To be close to her, your wolf was longing to be closer to this woman and you couldn't understand why.

**

You had been spending almost two weeks at the castle now. You grew quite close to the Dimitrescu daughters in the time being. They had grown fond of you and quite protective of you as well. The same going for the lady of the house. Seeing as you often spent your time with her. Always craving her presences, your wolf just felt more at home with her near you.

Seeing as it was still cold out, colder than before, time was spent inside the castle. Since the girls couldn't handle the cold. Daniela being the most sensitive to the cold. You would change in your wolf form and just cuddle with her. A sight that Alcina found way too adorable. Not that she'd say anything.

Ever since you had arrived to the castle things had been...different. She had spent time wanting to be closer to you. She watched how her girls grew closer and closer to you as each day passed. She never once seen her daughters grow attached to someone so quickly.

She watched as you would find an excuse to be near her. How you would always find a way to be by her side. She couldn't deny that she also had moments she wanted you.

*

Two months later

It was one of those days where even though the fire helped keep most rooms warm, the girls were still cold. The weather outside had really picked up. It came down to all sharing one room. Alcina had moved the girls into her own room along with you.

You smiled up at Alcina when you entered her room. She returned the smile, seeing you had now made her room yours. Through the two months you came you came realize why you wanted to be near her so much. Why you were so protective of her. (Lord Heisenberg had come around, you were not a fan of his. Not the the way he spoke to your ma-to Alcina). You also realized that Alcina Dimitrescu was your mate. She also figured it out. There were times where she wanted to wrap her arms around you and like you could hear you were there. In her arms. It was something Alcina had to get used to. Having someone she loves. She had never fell so quickly for someone. But you. You were her mate.

Loving you was one of the easiest thing she ever had to do.

:)

[fukanouna]

Close your eyes (it's okay now)

Summary: Wanda finds herself alone in the afterlife. Then she reunites with a familiar redhead.

Set after the events of DS2: MoM.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff

Word Count: 934

A/N: Hello :)

---

Wanda felt like she was floating.

She didn't know where she was and could not open her eyes. Everything felt so heavy, yet somehow, she felt so free. The malevolent whispers of the Darkhold were gone from her mind. Wanda wasn't sure when was the last time she was able to think with such a level of clarity.

Then, Wanda felt her feet land on something kind of solid. She sank into the ground slightly and heard the gentle sound of ocean waves crashing. Her eyes snapped open, and she found herself on some kind of beach. A seemingly endless forest stood behind her, while a setting sun that peaked above the horizon was in front of her, painting the skies a fiery red and orange. For some reason, Wanda found herself in a sleeveless cotton white dress and bare feet lightly buried under the sand. The look didn't suit her.

Not after what she's done.

Wanda strolled along the shore, taking in the warm breeze and the salty scent of the ocean. She walked for what felt like hours, yet she never grew tired. No matter how far she walked, there was no sign of any life. Birds, fish, crustaceans, people - there was nothing. Just Wanda, the land, the sea, and the sky.

Then she came across a large log on the sand facing the ocean.

But what caught her attention was not the log itself, but who was sitting on it.

Natasha turned her head and smiled.

"Hey, Wanda."

Wanda almost started crying.

"Natasha?" She was wearing a black tactical suit that wasn't familiar to Wanda, and her hair woven in a side braid.

Natasha patted the space next to her. "Come sit with me." When Wanda stayed frozen in place, she tilted her head to one side. "What's wrong?"

"The last thing I remember was telling Strange I was destroying every copy of the Darkhold and bringing down the castle atop of Mount Wundagore," Wanda said quietly, looking far off across the ocean, before settling her gaze back on the other woman. "I'm dead."

Natasha's gaze softened. "You are."

"Does that mean you aren't real?"

"I'm not part of your imagination, if that's what you're asking," the Widow chuckled. "I just suddenly found myself here, waiting. Somehow, I just knew it was you I was waiting for. Maybe it's because now I also have ties to an Infinity Stone."

Wanda felt the incoming tears in the back of her throat. There was so much kindness in the way Natasha looked at her, the way she spoke to her with such gentleness, it was too much when Wanda didn't deserve any of that. She felt the Chaos Magic flowing through every fiber of her being, and in one large motion of her arms, the pure cotton dress was consumed by blood red energy streams and revealed her as the Scarlet Witch. She thought Natasha would recoil from her new form, but the other woman remained expressionless.

"After what I've done, after killing and hurting so many innocent people, I don't deserve your kindness," Wanda said with strained voice. She started down at her blackened fingertips that were still tainted from the Darkhold. "I don't deserve to see you," she added more quietly. "I'm no longer the Wanda you knew."

Several seconds passed before Natasha stood up and placed herself right in front of Wanda. The smile returned to the Widow's face as she took Wanda's hands into her own. "You'll always be my Wanda."

Tears poured from Wanda's eyes. "You don't understand—"

"I do understand," Natasha interrupted her. "You saw my memories. What I used to do, what I used to be. Yet that never stopped you from wanting us to grow closer." Her thumbs slowly swiped over and over across the back of Wanda's hands in a comforting manner. "I don't know what you did and I don't need to know. Because none of that matters anymore. In the end, you tried to make amends. To no longer let the hurt control you and do good again. That's why I know you're still my Wanda."

Wanda closed her eyes and sobbed hard as Natasha spoke to her and made no effort in resisting when she felt Natasha's arms wrapped around her. She couldn't remember the last time someone held her like this and forgot what it was like to be loved. Not wanting to separate, she reciprocated the embrace and held Natasha as tightly as she physically could.

"You did well, Wanda. You can rest now," Natasha whispered softly into her ear.

It took awhile before Wanda calmed down and finally joined Natasha on the log, shoulder to shoulder.

"What now?" Wanda asked.

Natasha shrugged. "Whatever you want. We have all the time in the universe. What's the first thing you want to do?"

Wanda hummed thoughtfully. Her eyes stared at the warm ball of light that stood across the ocean from them. "Watch the sunset with you," she answered with a smile.

"How romantic of you," Natasha remarked with a slight smirk. "Trying to make me swoon, Maximoff?"

"Perhaps," the witch smirked back. "Is it working?"

"Actually, yes."

Wanda and Natasha laughed together.

While the sun slowly dipped below the horizon to reveal the stars in the sky, the two of them sat in silence as the ocean breeze blew past them. There wasn't much time left until Wanda had to decide what to do next in the afterlife, but as she glanced over at Natasha, she was immediately comforted knowing she wasn't alone.

And that was more than enough.

---

A/N: Thanks for reading :)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Walking on Sunshine 3

Sister series to Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows

Warnings: non/dubcon, antisocial behaviour, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

Characters: God The Bounty Hunter x reader

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You stare at the muffin, pondering it as if it holds the meaning of life. Where did it come from? Who could know of your secret longing? Or could it be a lucky guess?

Surely, it isn’t your prospective friend from the break room. Too fast, despite your hopes. You really can’t figure who would do this. As far as you know, you’re more of a name on a roster than an actual person in this office. That grumpy goth guy made that clear on your first day when he ran diagnostics on your machine.

You huff. Do you let temptation take over? A muffin, that’s a nice gesture, but it could also be a trap. Maybe your seat neighbour is trying to poison you for all your squeaking. The cinnamon makes your mouth water and you put the crumbly dessert back in the bag.

You put it in the corner of your desk and try to ignore it. There it is, taunting you with its deliciousness. You really should have eaten something. Now your stomach is growling at you angrily.

You sip your hot chocolate to suppress the cravings. You click and tap keys and zone out as you go through the usual corporate monotony. You feel like a robot just going through the motions. The same thing over and over.

You sit up and rub your eyes, leaning back so your chair squeaks, so high it hurts your ears. Ugh, curse this chair. But don’t really, it’s cursed enough.

Your neighbour mutters and makes a noise as if to mimic your chair. You whisper an apology. You drop your hands and a dark shape above the wall of your cubicle catches your attention. Your eyes round as they meet two others, vibrantly blue but dark at the same time.

It’s that man again. He just sits there, watching you. He peels the wrapper away from a muffin and pinches away a piece of the top. He’s expressionless as he puts it between his lips. He lets his fingers drag slightly as he seals his mouth and chews, still watching you.

Your mouth falls open and you look at the paper bag then back to him. His brows twitch just a little. Oh, wow. That’s strange. Who is this man and why is he so quiet and mysterious? You wheel your chair out slowly, careful not to make too much noise. You stand but hit the desk with your hip, jolting your cubicle and the next.

“I swear…” the slither rolls from your neighbours tight throat.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you look over as your neighbour hunches down but doesn’t acknowledge you further. Maybe you could be relocated.

You look up and the man is gone. What? How? He’s like a ghost. Are you imagining him? Are you cracking from this office purgatory and blacking out to buy sweet desserts? What’s real and what’s not? That’s a question better left to Descartes.

You sit back down and reach for your cup. There’s nothing that can be cured with sugary goodness. And there’s some things that can’t be forgotten, like that muffin and its sinister aura.

🌞

The muffin stays in its habitat. You let the sugar crumble fester, fighting not to let the cinnamon tempt you to err. Your work is made even more tedious by the paper bag sat not far from your mouse. Tear up the planks! It is the beating of his hideous heart!

Not exactly a Poe horror, only a muffin. You sigh as you log out for the day, packing up slowly as you ponder the weight of a single baked good. Your desk neighbour is gone swiftly, striding off with another mutter. They can’t even be happy about quitting time.

You pull your jacket on and sling your bag on your shoulder. One last look at the paper bag. You don’t have the heart to dump it in the bin. It’s a problem for tomorrow, another line on the list.

You take the stairs like you always do. The elevator is too crowded for you. It lurches terribly and gives you vertigo. Besides, you sit at a desk all day, you need to stretch your legs.

You get to the bottom floor and pop your earbuds in. Time to finish the saga of the tragic marriage. Your walk home isn’t far. It’s depressingly close. It feels like your entire life revolves around the soulless office building.

You tuck your hands into your pocket and dip your chin down. The narrator’s voice fills your ears, blocking out the impatient honking of rush hour and the noise of pedestrians shuffling by. You stop at the light, waiting for it to change.

A figure comes up next to you. You inch away, giving them space. They get closer. You stare ahead of you, your neck hot as the shadow hovers over you. The light changes but before you can set across the street, a paper bag greets you and has you stepping back.

You gasp and reach for your earbuds, turning to face the man as he holds out the paper bag. It’s him! The office ghost. He’s real!

“Oh, uh, it was… you?” You eke out as he says nothing. “Um…” you look back to the bag, almost crosseyed for how close he holds it. “That’s so kind of you but I don’t know if I should.”

He blinks and his brow ripples. He looks at the paper bag quizzically then at you. You flinch as he steps closer, reaching for you. You’re frozen in shock as he takes your wrist and turns your hand up. He places the bag firmly against your palm. You close your fingers around the bottom of the bag so it crinkles.

He lets you go, a curt nod before he brushes by you, leaving you speechless and confused as he marches down the perpendicular lane. You turn to watch his broad shoulders stalk down the pavement, oblivious to those who sidle out of his way. You adjust your grasp on the muffin as your mind races.

The mystery of the muffin is cracked but a million more questions flurry in your head. You don't even know his name.

[chaotic-mystery]

Not A Survivalist Girl: Part 3

“Mr. Fucking Piece of Work Miller”

Written by @chaotic-mystery & @tightjeansjavi

(Joel Miller x f!reader)

Summary: Joel Miller lives a life alone. It's the way he likes it. After losing his daughter 13 years ago, and his brother Tommy ditching him for the fireflies out west, he doesn't have much sympathy, nor care for what remains of civilization. That is..until he meets you in the woods one cold night. How stupid could you really be to light a fire, and put yourself in imminent danger.

Warnings: implied age gap, canon typical violence (eventually) slow burn, mean! Joel, dark! Joel, is literally just a grumpy old asshole!Joel, sunshine reader, no survival skills but she's doing her best, Joel is a loner, mentions of depression, PTSD, trauma, childloss, angst, grumpy vibes, some degradation, nicknames, teasing, eventual smut, (+18) minors dni!

WC: 3.1k

At dawn's impending approach, Joel was still wide awake. He didn’t sleep much these days anyway. His eyes were dry, and crusty and his back ached from sitting on a log all fucking night. The pain reminded him that he was still alive, that he was still breathing. There was frost coating the dry grass in little ice crystals and the fire from the night before had completely died out. Not even the morsels of hot embers remained. Joel was freezing but he would be damned if he’d wrap himself up in your stupid fluffy pink blanket. That was until his teeth started to chatter, and he could see his cold puffs of air. With a grumble of pure annoyance, he wrapped his broad frame in the fluffy blanket. He wasn’t happy about it but what choice did he really have?

As you climbed out of your tent and slowly made your way to Joel, your eyes fell on your pink blanket that was draped around his broad shoulders. “Good morning, I uh- I see you found my blanket.” You cleared your throat and crossed your arms over your chest for warmth. The morning sun was barely peeking over the horizon, the air nipping at your cheeks. Joel immediately took the blanket off of him like it had something wrong with it and practically shoved it in your arms as he stood up in front of you.

Joel responded with a grunt as he slowly stood up from the log, bringing his hand to his lower back as he tried to stretch it out. Goddamn log. Goddamn stupid fucking fluffy pink blanket. Goddamn stupid cans hanging from a fucking tree. Goddamn birds chirping. Goddamn. Goddamn. Goddamn. You looked cute in the morning. That was for goddamn sure.

“So are you really not going to let me come with you? I can be so helpful to you and you don’t even want to consider that?” You were trying to make him a great offer, but he instantly called your bluff.

Joel scoffed under his breath as he straightened out his back before reaching down and grabbing ahold of his rifle that was resting along the log. “Now why the hell would I let you come with me, girlie? You don’t got shit to fuckin’ offer me. Except for another body to look out for and a mouth to feed. Do I really come across as the charitable type? Cause I sure as hell ain’t.”

Your eyes looked up as you were taking in his answer like you could see it working through your brain. “That's…very true, but think of it this way: you can show me how to shoot guns, use knives better, I can look out when we go hunting so you can actually get some sleep and not be a grouchy ass man! It’s perfect and we both win!” The singsong tone you had going on was getting on his last nerve and you loved it.

Joel chucked under his breath as he cocked his rifle, slinging it over his shoulder. “You? Look out for me? That’s cute darlin’. Absolutely fuckin’ adorable actually that you think I have any use for you. The hell am I supposed to do with your ditzy self and that fuckin’ pink blanket, Hm? Enlighten me girlie.”

As your mind raced for a useful response, you started to panic as he was losing patience quickly. “I just don’t want to be left by myself anymore and I know for a fact I can be helpful to you if you teach me, please..I don’t know where to go from here. It’s a miracle I’ve lasted this long but I’ll do anything, I’ll listen to everything you say.” Your twiddling thumbs came to a stop with your sentence as you met his eyes, showing him how serious you were being.

Joel pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath as he squeezed his eyes shut momentarily and muttered something unintelligible through gritted teeth. The truth was, Joel had spent all fucking night going over the pros and the cons of taking you with him. Unbeknownst to you, he just wanted to see how far you would go to insure your own safety. Leaving you out here to fend for yourself was certainly a death warrant. You were the first living person he had come across in months and perhaps the company wouldn’t be entirely awful. He also just couldn’t stand to face the flashing images in his head of you being torn apart by clickers, or worse.

The silence started to put fear in your heart, not really sure if he’d change his mind and let you tag along with him to wherever the hell he was going. The truth was just that: you needed him. Somehow his scary presence he tried so hard to put forward wasn’t scary to you, it actually made you want to know more about him. You tucked some of your hair behind your ear and crossed your arms slowly as you waited for his response, preparing yourself to hear him tell you no.

“You’ll listen to everything I say? No questions asked? You’re damn right it’s a miracle that you have lasted this fuckin’ long out here girlie. You clearly got some fight left in ya.” I can’t believe I’m about to do this. Joel internally said to himself. Allowing you to travel with him was going to take some time getting used to. An adjustment that would come with all the bumps, and nitty gritty shit along the way.

“You can come with me girlie. I’ll keep you safe, and I’ll teach you everything you need to survive. Don’t go and get all excited just yet cause I got some fuckin’ ground rules. First, you listen to everythin’ I tell ya to do, got it? Whatever I say goes and trust me, you ain’t gonna want to start arguin’ with me. If I tell you to run? You fuckin’ run. If I tell you to shoot? You fuckin’ shoot. Finally, if you get bit, just realize right now that I’m gonna have to kill ya. I’d make it quick, painless before the cordyceps spread. Do yourself a favor and do not get bit. Alright?” Joel spoked sternly, he wanted to instill a bit of fear into you. Some tough love if you will. He hoped to god that he’d never have to kill you under any circumstances.

“Thank fucking god, you didn’t have to wait so long to say that, this isn’t some movie where we need dramatic effects!” You let out a huge fake sigh and sarcastically wiped your forehead, trying to play it off that you weren’t actually scared.

“How about you just say fuckin’ thank you for me saving your goddamn life? Don’t make me change my mind, girlie. Those clickers are still gonna be lookin’ for a snack.” Joel grumbled before he reached into his bag and pulled out a small pistol. “You know how to use one of these things girlie? Or would you prefer a knife? Pick your poison cus’ I got lots of it.”

“Thank you oh so very much kind sir, how ever will I repay you?” You mocked in a terrible southern accent. You thought about all the options he listed and decided on the knife, holding out your hand for him. There was no turning back now, you were in it. You were here and you had to listen to everything he says, but where's the fun in that?

Joel let out a grumbled sigh as he stuffed the pistol back into his backpack before retrieving a decent sized combat knife and handed it over with the blade pointing towards the ground. “Try to not hurt yourself with this, alright sweetheart? She’s pretty sharp.”

“Well if I do hurt myself I have plenty of bandages to use, I’ll just need a hand with it probably” you teased and observed the knife, your thumb brushing over the sharp blade gently. “So where are we going now? Don’t really think you want to stay here after killing all those clickers last night.” Even when he grumbled and talked to you as if you didn’t know a fucking knife was sharp, he was still growing on you. Sure you only met him last night, but you weren’t afraid to admit he was easy on the eyes.

Joel let out a deep sigh as he zipped up his bag. It had only just dawned upon him that he was going to have to share a space with a whole other human being now. His cabin was his safe space. His solace. His home. The fact of reality was he didn’t really want to have to share his space, but what choice did he really have? He promised to protect you and stubborn as he may be, he was a man of his word. “Well, I’ve uh—got a cabin 10 miles west of here. It’s a bit of a hike so I hope you ain’t gonna complain too much about bein’ on your feet.”

“You have a cabin? Why didn’t we go back to it last night instead of sleeping out in the fucking cold?” You start to take the supplies from inside your tent out as you wait for his response. After the third item you put outside the tent, you felt like he was judging so you wrapped everything else in your sleeping bag and rolled it shut, setting it outside in a ball. “Regardless why we didn’t go back, I can’t go to someone’s cabin who won’t even tell me their name, ya know?” The desperation was apparent, you just wanted to know his name.

“Use your head, girlie. Why the hell would I take a total stranger back with me in the middle of the night? Like I said earlier, I ain’t a charitable person. Plus if you knew any better, traveling at night, is by far one of the dumbest things to fuckin’ do out here.” He stated as a matter of factly. Course she wants to know my name. “It’s Joel. My name is Joel. Don’t go and wear it out, cus’ I jus’ have a feelin’ that you will girlie.”

The sound of his name just sparks something inside you, you feel your heart racing a little more now that you finally have a name with a face. “Joel..I like that. It suits you.” I definitely will be wearing it out though, in more ways than one, you thought quietly to yourself. Maybe it was your daddy issues or maybe because you haven’t been around humans in forever, but he set your body on fire, regardless of how much older he was than you.

“You’re a weird one, you know that girlie? It’s just an average Joe’s name. Ain’t nothin’ special about it.” He grumbled under his breath as he slung his backpack over his shoulder. “C’mon, we gotta get movin’ and I don’t plan on takin’ any rest breaks.” He strode past you, giving you a light shoulder check.

As you walk for what feels like forever, you finally make it to his cabin. It’s quaint but still beautiful and bigger than you thought it would be. “Holy shit, Joel! Did you build this yourself? This is amazing.” You compliment as your hand runs over the smooth wooden beam of the porch.

By the time you and Joel arrived at the cabin, Joel’s back was aching, and his boots felt way too tight but he did a good job of hiding it, especially when he was so close to having a stiff glass of whiskey. “Yeah I uh..built it. Took a bitch in a half, but it’s pretty sturdy. Hold your horses though, alright? I need to check to make sure the area is safe. Almost had a nasty run in with some raiders last month so I’ve taken some extra precautions.” He was already cocking his rifle, using his freehand to grasp your arm and yank you behind him protectively.

You’d be lying if you said him putting you behind his back while he looks for anything out of the ordinary didn't scare you. No one had ever been that protective over you though, the way his hands cocked his gun so fast, he didn’t hesitate to take the right measures to ensure your safety. It was hard not to admire him for his bravery. “Yeah I think I’ll just stay riiight back here, behind you.” You whispered and crouched behind him so all you could see was his back. You grabbed the bottom of his shirt to keep you following the right direction as you were close to him at all times.

Joel lightly smacked your hand away, turning his head slightly to look down at you with a narrowed glare. “Cut that shit out. How the hell am I gonna protect us if you’re grippin’ on me like that? Jus’ stay right here, and do not move till I say you can. You got that girlie?” He harshly whispered.

“What? No! You can’t leave me here by myself!” You half-whispered back at him as you dropped your hands to your side. There was a small chance someone could come out right now and stab you to death, leaving you to die in your own pool of blood and he wouldn’t even know it because he thought leaving you alone was a good idea.

“Shuddup. You’re gonna be fine! Just lay low and don’t make a fuckin’ sound.” He whispered as he glanced over his shoulder once more, giving you a reassuring small nod that everything was gonna be just fine. It was always just better to be safe, than sorry. He quietly climbed up the wooden steps, taking a small breath as he slowly pushed open the door handle to the cabin, aiming his gun around the expanse of the entryway. He meticulously checked every room in the small cabin before he made his way back to the front door, pushing it open as he peeked his head out. “Alright, girlie. Coast is clear. We’re safe.”

“Don’t do that shit again, not until you’ve taught me how to defend myself, buddy.” You said annoyed at your own fear making your skin crawl as you put your hand on his chest and pushed past him into his cabin.

“What the fuck did ya just say to me girlie?” Joel grasped your upper arm firmly around his calloused palm, stopping you in your tracks. “Keep that fuckin’ attitude up with me and you’ll be sleepin’ outside like a goddamn dog sweetheart.” His words were harsh, bitter down to the very bone.

“Let go of me, just show me where I’m sleeping, please I’m tired.” You knew you should apologize for your fear making you be so mean but fuck he didn’t need to be so harsh. You looked him in the eye as you tried to tug your arm away, not succeeding in the slightest.

Joel inhaled deeply, exhaling as his nostrils flared out. His grip loosened along your upper arm till it was gone completely. “Fine. Would a thank you fuckin’ hurt? I’m gonna have to teach you some fuckin’ manners.” He gritted through his teeth, striding past you. His boots were heavy along the wooden floor as he walked further into his home.

You rolled your eyes out of his sight and sighed, following him loosely. He could make you sleep on the floor if he really wanted you to, to which you’d lock him out of his bedroom and sleep in his bed. Then who’d be the one sleeping on the floor, Mr.Asshole? “Oh I have manners and I use them with people who deserve them. You, however, do not. Feel free to teach me anything else though, I’m a quick learner.”

“Oh my god, my poor poor heart. That really hurts me, girlie. Go on and twist the knife deeper, why don’t ya?” He scoffed under his breath as he walked down the hall before making an abrupt stop at the first room on the right. He shoved the door open with a small grunt. “This is where you’ll be sleepin.’ It ain’t much, but the bed is decent. Bathroom is down the hall. Don’t expect 5 star service either. Still workin’ on getting proper plumbing.”

“Well thank you, I will be sure to leave a review tomorrow morning, depending how the night goes. Thank you, and I’m sorry.” You hated saying sorry, but it was in your best interest to at this moment. You reached out to touch his arm, just to show him you meant no harm.

“Uh huh. You’re so very welcome.” His tone was laced with sarcasm and as soon as you reached out to touch his arm, he instinctively moved back. Joel was not an intimate person. Well, not on the surface at least. Even so, that part of him had died a long time ago. He wasn’t about to welcome it back in with open arms. “Get some sleep.” Was the last thing he said before he retreated from the open doorway. He grabbed his bottle of whiskey from the makeshift kitchen area, not even bothering to grab a glass before he took a large swig, muttering under his breath. The front door could be heard slamming shut shortly after as he went to stack wood on the log rack. His muscles ached, and his back was sore but these were things that Joel Miller had grown accustomed to. He’d rather suffer through physical pain than deal with his emotions.

As you made your way to the guest room, you noticed his room was right next to yours. Looking around for Joel in sight when you finally saw him outside carrying firewood to fill the log rack on the side of the cabin, you slipped in his room just for a moment. There was a framed photo of a younger version of Joel and a young girl was sitting on his nightstand, he was covering her eyes as the photo was being taken. She had a beautiful smile and this was a whole different version of Joel you didn’t even think existed. Context clues were telling you something bad had happened, but now was not the time to pry. Setting the pink duffle bag on the ground, you quickly grabbed your blanket from inside, fluffed it out and folded it so it was just the right size to lay at the end of the bed for him to use tonight. Regardless of what he said, he liked your blanket and he’d never admit it, and this was your peace offering for not having manners.

[bumpkinspice0]

Recovery Time: Chapter 6

Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

No use of y/n

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 4.2k

Summary: You throw Joel a Birthday party... and end the night with a dance

Warnings: Angst soothed away by fluff, verbal fight, Past trauma, Joel has big feelings and some dirty thoughts, mutual pining

Series Masterlist

Previous - Next

AO3

_______________

Chapter 6: Happy Birthday Joel Miller

It’d been 3 days since he let his birthday date slip and you’d been plotting ever since.

You stand nervously in the kitchen just waiting for him to come back home— and you feel like a fucking idiot. The sun had set. He went out to check the traps 45 minutes ago. You’d turned on the generator less than 30 minutes ago and pulled his birthday cake, a bastardized version of apple crisp, out of the oven 20 minutes ago. Now you’re just… standing there. Staring at the door. Like a fucking idiot. 

You’re nervous for absolutely no reason other than this was a surprise. You’d been nervous just thinking about it all day. Your nerves were apparently so obvious that he asked if you were alright a handful of times. You weren’t too good a lying but you managed to get him off your sent. You want it to be perfect, but you don’t even know what that means. This wasn’t really a traditional party. Hell, this wasn’t even a party. It was a night to take a load off. To relax. To forget about… everything. An illusion really. A chance to pretend that everything was okay.

This was Joel’s night, his first since he got here. Whatever he wanted. A ‘thank you for tumbling into my life, I think we’re friends now’ party. 

But maybe this was stupid after all. Childish and dumb. You should quit while you're ahead. Turn off the generator and say you just made some apple crisp for shits and giggles. You should—

Your heart nearly leaps through your throat when the door opens. Gus rushes in first, slowly followed by Joel. He looks… confused. Reasonable reaction.

“What’s… what’s this?” He asks slowly, glancing around at the random strung Christmas lights crisscrossing the ceiling. He’d surely seen the ones strung across the yard too, “You turned on the generator?”

“I did.” You answer with a small smile.

He slowly paces around the living room, blanketed in golden rainbow light.

“For?”

“Your belated birthday,” You raise your hands and give some weak spirit fingers, “Surprise.”

He pauses, facing away from you. You see his shoulders tense, the rest of him almost frozen in place. The telltale sign he was uncomfortable. Oh no. You immediately feel like you need to explain yourself. The words come pouring out of you at lightspeed before you give him a chance to say anything.

“I-I know a lot of people don’t feel like there isn’t anything to celebrate anymore, I did too, but you deserve it. Everyone deserves something. I know it’s not much but I made… Well, it’s not a cake but it’s like apple crisp and you can have the stereo playing as long as you want. The TV too. We don’t have the best movie selection but you can pick whatever you want tonight. I even brought up a bottle of wine. I know it’s not—”

“Stop,” His gravel voice cuts through your stammering in an instant. “Just… stop it.”

Suddenly the air feels heavy. You’d done something. You’ve offended him somehow.

“I– I’m sorry. Did I—”

“I told you,” He turns around, an anger in his eyes you hadn't seen before. Or… maybe it was pain? You instantly feel small. “I fucking told you to forget it.”

You’ve overstepped. Massively overstepped. You fucked up. Oh god, you fucked up.

“I just wanted to—I know you—”

“You don’t know anything.” He spits, taking a step closer. You reflexively take a step back. You know he’d never hurt you, but fuck he was terrifying, “You don’t know a goddamn thing about me. Stop actin’ like you do.”

His voice booms, threatening to shake the log cabin walls. Even Gus cowers behind you. He’s scary. He’s absolutely terrifying. The silence that lingers is somehow even louder than his outrage. You don’t want to say anything else. You don’t think you could if you tried.

Even if you could speak, it wouldn’t matter anyway. He turns to leave almost immediately, slamming the door behind him. 

You fucked up.

________________

Joel stumbles in the dark out past the property, the glow of lights fading in the distance. 

He wants to scream. He wants to find something and kill it. He wants to cut a hole in his head so all the memories can come pouring out and he’ll never have to feel them again. He wants to be numb. He wants to be free of this, even though he knows he never could be.

Her face is still crystal clear in his mind, just like it was every day. That sweet smile. Big curly hair. Those bright eyes you could never say no to– Sarah. His beautiful, perfect daughter. The only person he’s certain he’d ever truly loved. The one who deserved to live. He wants to purge every memory of her but never let them go simultaneously. How could you just forget the best thing that ever happened to you? He tried to. For years he tried.

No parent should ever have to bury their child. The pain never stopped. The bottomless pit he could never dig himself out of. It’s like it happened yesterday. And tonight you brought it all boiling to the surface. Things he fought so hard for years to keep buried ten feet deep.

Fuck you. Fuck you for doing this to him. 

A frustrated roar rips from his throat as his fist makes contact with the closest tree. The pain is instant and only serves as a distraction for a few fleeting seconds. Still, it’s more welcome than the boiling cauldron of other emotions brewing. 

Anger. Betrayal. Sadness. 

Guilt seems to blanket over all of them now that the initial rage is fading. The look on your face while he screamed at you is something that’ll be tattooed on his mind forever.  You didn’t deserve this, him and all the fucked up baggage he came with. You’d been nothing but kind since you dragged him here and tonight he spat in your face.

You were like her in a way— Like Sarah. Stubborn and too damn smart for your own good. A compassionate soul that wanted to share it with others. Someone who always had a positive outlook on life. What did you blurt in the middle of your stammering? 

Everyone deserves something.

If only you knew how wrong that was when it came to him. Joel deserved the early grave he dug for himself, but you came along and pulled him out of it— and this is how he repays you?

You didn’t know. There’s no way you could have— and yet that still doesn’t seem to ebb away any of the anger still simmering just under the surface. ‘Is that all I am anymore?’ Joel thinks. ‘An angry old man?’ He didn’t want it, all this hate. He wanted to be better for you.

You don’t know a goddamn thing about me. That’s what he spat at you— but whose fault was that? You tried. You tried so hard for him to let you in, and he always shut the door in your face.

You saw him like a bird with a broken wing, fallen from its nest. Something innocent that needed help that only your skillful hands could deliver. If only you knew what he really was. 

He wanted to protect you from himself in a way. If you knew everything he’d done, everything that made his brother run from him, you'd never look at him like you do. He’s caught your passing glances a few times, those beautiful eyes peering around the corner— studying him like a bug. But if you knew him, really knew him… You’d probably never want to see him again. Just like Tommy. 

Maybe he’s really just protecting himself in the end. That’s what he’s good at. 

It felt good to be desired. Not for his skills or connections, but just as a man. That faint swell of masculine pride and desire pumps in his chest, he’d almost forgotten what it felt like. You did that to him.

You wanted him. 

He wanted you back. Badly. 

You both spend your entire days together, yet when he goes to bed at night you’re still all he can see when he closes his eyes. He’s not sure when it happened. Daydreams of you he’s ashamed of. Would you be like how he imagines? What would you taste like? How would his name sound lustfully drooled out of your mouth? 

He’s found relief by his own hand one too many times just thinking about it, but he somehow just knows his imagination will never compare. 

And he’ll never find out.

He can’t. He can’t stay here. Someone like him was a cancer in your home. He knew that. He knew it.

And even so, the prospect of leaving you here alone was getting harder and harder to imagine. 

A sharp ruff from behind pulls him from his thoughts. He turns to see Gus standing, all four paws planted and squared for a fight. Joel worries for a moment he’ll have to fight this damn dog off but he doesn’t make a move. If Gus wanted a fight he would have pounced on him when his back was turned. No, the dog wanted his attention. 

Gus sits, huffing an annoyed grunt as he does so. Somehow the message in the animal's movements rings clear. 

Our girl’s upset because of you. Get back there. Get back there and fix this.

Joel groans, sliding down to the ground against the tree he just assaulted. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?” he asks the dog, sighing into his hands. The dog huffs again and cocks his head. ‘Intuitive little thing,’ Joel thinks.

Part of him just wants to stay here. Sleep out in the freezing cold and come back in the morning and pretend nothing ever happened. An unlikely scenario since he knows for a fact you’d come hunt him down eventually and scold him for staying out in the cold so long. It begs the question though, could you both just ignore this? Forget about it and move on. Probably, but he doesn’t want to.

You deserve an apology. You deserved something from him, even if he couldn’t tell you why. He can’t tell you about Sarah. Fuck, he can’t tell anyone about Sarah. He doesn’t owe you an explanation but maybe he could fix the night. Give something back, just say thank you, anything. 

Just as long as you wouldn’t completely hate him, he’d be happy.

Lilly comes wandering up and takes a defensive seat next to Gus and it’s the final kick in the ass he needs.

With your little family sitting in front of him, waiting for him to get off his ass and make things right, he slowly raises back to his feet. 

He sighs, leaning against the tree. He’s not as tired as he used to be a few weeks ago. He can bear some weight on his leg again. You did that. You put him back together again. You fixed him. He can fix one night. 

“Time to be a man, Miller.”

____________________

The tears came so suddenly. It’s embarrassing, which only makes you cry harder. You sit there in the kitchen corner weeping into your hands like a teen girl on prom night that got stood up. Yeah, embarrassing.

You must look particularly pathetic because even Gus didn’t stick around to comfort you.

Why did this bother you so much? You’d been called every name in the book working as an apocalypse medic. You’d seen death countless times, you’d told families they’d never see their loved one again, you’d been through absolute hell at the hands of others, so why did a few harsh words from Joel stab so deep?

Because it was him. Because you wanted something from him. It wasn’t quite rejections… but it was close.

Part of you wanted to scream at him too, find out what his fucking problem is. You offer him home comforts and he does this? Childish. The other part of you thinks he’s right. He told you to forget it and you went ahead anyway, thinking it would all be fine.

 He was right. You didn’t know anything about him. Almost nothing. He wouldn’t let you in. 

But why should he? Why should anyone? He didn’t owe you his life story or undying loyalty because you did what any rational good person should do. Yes, you saved his life, but something like that isn’t weighed in favors and secrets. It doesn’t require repayment.

Joel didn’t owe you anything.

So why did you really try to throw this little party? For you. For selfish, arrogant reasons. You were looking for something to make you feel human again and this was the best option. Everything in your life had to be justified. There can’t be enjoyment just for enjoyment's sake. Everything had to be done for a reason— and tonight he was that reason. Joel Miller was making you feel human again.

When the second realization about his birthday hits you, the pit in your stomach drops even deeper. 

You knew the date seemed so familiar, probably because you wanted to forget it. Everyone did. September 26th, the day the world ended. Joel’s birthday was on fucking outbreak day. Of course he’d want to forget whatever horrors he’d seen that day. Every year a constant reminder. What a horrible coincidence to carry with you. Terrible luck of the draw. 

Still, in the absolute mess you find yourself in, you’re still angry. You’re angry at him. Frustrated he’d talk to you that way. React so callously and scold you like a child for trying to do something kind. Suddenly, it feels like you’re back at square one with him. You want to scream at him, you want apologize profusely— you just want to cry.

You’re not sure how long you sit on the kitchen floor but eventually the tears stop— and then the door opens.

You pop up from the floor, wiping your cheeks one last time with your sleeve as if that would even hide your red puffy eyes.

He stands there in the open doorway, remorse painted on his pitiful face. Good.

“Darlin’... have you been—”

“I’m fine,” You spit, wiping your face in the most threatening way you can manage, “Here to yell at me more?”

“I’m not—” He cuts himself off, turning to close the door. Gus and Lilly scurry in before he does so. They immediately come to sit at your feet. Did they… go get him for you? Well, at least you know whose side they’re on now. Joel scratches at his neck, seemingly unable to make eye contact, “I don’t suppose I’m sorry is enough here.”

“It’s a start,” You cross your arms and lean back against the counter, letting out a heavy sigh of your own. You were angry, yes, but he’s allowed to be angry too. He made a boundary and you deliberately stepped over it thinking everything would be fine. He’s not the only one at fault, “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too.”

His head instantly snaps in your direction, “You have nothing to be sorry for. I just—you— I didn’t expect— I’m sorry. There are things that I just don’t—”

He stammers and trips over his words but the message is clear. He’s trying. He’s really trying and that counts for something, however small. 

“You wanna… talk about it?” You extend an olive branch.

“No.” he bites out just a little too quickly. You see him immediately kick himself for how harshly it came out. There was more here than met the eye— you decide to drop it. If he doesn’t want to say, then it’s not your damn business. 

Again, You were both at fault here. You for sticking your nose where it didn’t need to be and him for just being an ass about it. You were both being children here. 

Time to grow up.

You start, “I’ll turn this all off. You don’t have to—”

“No,” He cuts you off abruptly, “It’d be a waste to— You went through the trouble I mean.”

You smile, “Would you still like to have a birthday party, Mr. Miller?”

“I–” he pressed his lips together, suppressing some more outrage, “Can we— let’s call it something else. Please.”

“Okay,” you nod quietly. Not a birthday party. That’s just fine. It’s still his party. You take down two glasses and pour some chokecherry wine. You push his glass closer. He’s hesitant at first but eventually comes to the counter. He takes his glass and you raise yours to his. “To an ongoing recovery.”

He huffs a small smile and tinks his glass to yours, “To not dyin’, I suppose.”

You can’t help but cringe when the simultaneously bitter and overly sweet liquid hits your tongue. You notice he does the same. You’d hoped a year of sitting dormant in the cellar would help the flavor calm down— apparently not.

“Wow, that’s... something,” He wheezes, swirling the remaining liquid in his glass.

“Yeah, it is. But like I said—” You exhale before downing the rest of your glass, “It gets the job done and I haven’t gone blind yet.”

You hold your resolve for a few seconds, feeling rather proud of yourself, before breaking into a coughing fit from the burning in your throat. 

“Jesus Christ, girl,” Joel pats your back in an attempt to comfort you, despite the smile plastered on his face. Well, at least he’s smiling, even if you look like an absolute moron right now. 

“Smoothest in the county,” You wheeze, wiping a stray tear from your eye. You feel the heat in your cheeks rising and you can’t help but laugh at yourself a little. He tries to hide it but he does the same.

“You really are something, Darlin’,” He grins, taking another, much smaller, sip from his glass.

 And just like that, the air between you two was breathable again.

“So,” Joel leans against the counter, arms crossed, “What do you usually do on nights like this?”

“Well, this is your party,” you lean next to him, “What would you like?”

He opens his mouth for a millisecond before closing it again. He turns away from you, eyes darting to the ground. What was he thinking about? What was he going to say?

“You said you have music?” He asks. You absolutely know that’s not what he was originally going to ask, but you still gesture to the far corner of the living room where the dusty stereo and cassette collection lay.

He strolls over, taking a cursory glance at the packed shelf. Art may have liked the isolation but he kept a good collection of music to keep him sane. One of the few things you think he loved just for the sake of it. So many things here had to have a purpose, a reason for existing in this well-maintained space. Something to aid in basic survival. Music probably did, in a way, have a purpose here. All anyone had to gain from it was joy. A memory. A feeling. Just another thing to make you feel human again.

Joel makes his selection and places it in the tape player with a defined click. You expect to hear Johnny Cash or something like what he’s been teaching himself to play for the last few weeks. Instead— he’s picked Elton John. Art had a ‘best of’ collection of his work. Admittedly one of your favorites in the tape collection.

The familiar slow, melodic piano rumbles through the ancient speakers. You recognize the song instantly. An unexpected choice but not unwelcome either. 

Don’t Let the Sun Go Down On Me

Joel stands with a small grunt and turns to face you, hand outstretched.

“Dance with me.”

Your brows immediately shoot up, “Dance with you?”

“This is my party, isn’t it?” he drawls, “You said we can do what I want. I want a dance.”

You say nothing, dragging your fingers across the counter before making your way towards him. Every hair on your body stands on end as you approach. He stands there waiting in the center of the living room, bathed in mismatched Christmas lights. 

You suppress a gasp when you take his hand and he pulls you into him, flush against his chest. Hesitantly your hand goes up to his shoulder while he lowers his to the small of your back. You swear the sensation of his massive hands on you sends sparks shooting down your legs. He starts to sway you both gently in rhythm.

“I don’t really know how to dance,” You admit.

“Me neither,” he responds, “Learned a little in high school, though.”

“How long ago was that?”

“Oh, back when stagecoaches were still new.” He scoffs, pulling you away for a slow and somewhat clumsy twirl, “To be fair it was just square dancin’.”

“Oh, well, this is prime square dancing music.” You attempt to joke, hiding your reddening face against his chest. He huffs a small laugh and rests his chin on your head. It’s more intimate but at least you don’t have to look him in the eye now. You just barely hear his heartbeat above it all. Strong and steady, a little faster than you expected. You try to lose yourself in music, hoping it will ease your new anxieties that boil over from just being this close to him.

I can't find, oh, the right romantic line

But see me once and see the way I feel

Don't discard me just because you think I mean you harm

But these cuts I have, oh, they need love to help them heal

Don't let the sun go down on me 

Although I search myself, it's always someone else I see

I'd just allow a fragment of your life– to wander free

The chorus is grand and beautiful, nothing that should be associated with Joel and your awkward side-to-side swaying. And yet… it seemed so right. The two of you were so small, and somehow the only thing that mattered in the world.

In your time living at the end of the world, you’ve found it’s not the acts of heroism and grand gestures that kept you going. It was the small things. A hello. A hug. Drinking the worst wine in the world and having an awkward dance with a practical stranger. A kiss. The small things.

And even though this was his night, you still got what you wanted— you felt human again.

“Happy… recovery, Joel.”

“Thank you, darlin’.”

___________________________

It was perfect. He didn’t want to admit it, but it was. He can’t recall the last time he’d listened to music for reasons beyond getting code from Frank. He can’t even recall the last movie he’d watched. No… No, that’s not true. It was ten years ago on his couch. Has it really been ten years? He does his best to push the memories aside and just enjoy the moment.

Yet here he was in almost the same exact place he was all those years ago when his life changed forever. The irony is not lost on him. And in a way he doesn’t quite understand, it felt… healing. Like he was facing something. Or maybe he’d finally laid some feelings to rest.

You lay there asleep, head resting on his shoulder while some western he’d never heard of played on the ancient little box TV in the background. You’d made a cake. You’d made popcorn, the whole nine yards. It was so domestic. A treat, you called these nights. 

You were right, he supposes. A chance to just pretend everything was okay. To live like normal people used to. A night to not worry about all the challenges tomorrow brought and fall asleep watching some boring movie you’d never heard of. The new American dream. 

A treat.

Even if it was all a fantasy, he’s happy you shared it with him. Just another thing he can never repay you for. 

What could he ever give you that could ever compare to what you’d given him? Himself— he could give you himself, maybe. In a way, his life was already yours. You’d saved it, after all. But if he gave it to you, would you want it? If he took off his mask and showed you the monster that was underneath would you run?

Yes, of course you would. 

Despite everything that happened here, good things didn’t happen to Joel Miller. He was a walking curse, plague and death following in his wake. If he stayed here, he’d drag you down to hell with him. It’s what always happens. 

He can’t let this continue. He can’t let his selfish desires win and take over. 

He had tonight with you, and that’d have to be enough.