#and make this whomever's perspective you want

[ohkate]

On their 2nd anniversary

Happy Galladrabbles anniversary! As someone who just started you all have been so welcoming and kind. I'm so glad I signed up. Thank you all and especially to the mods for giving a big ole' bear hug to us newbies! ---------

It wasn’t 2 years.

They had known each other since they were kids and have loved each other for almost as long.

He couldn’t imagine then what they have now. He couldn’t see it yet. He hadn’t met this version of himself yet.  

What would it look like in 20 years? 50? It was weird to think of each other getting old and falling apart together. Wondering what their kids would look like. Imagining the house they grow old in.

These moments he knew would be but he just hadn’t met them yet.  

Taking care of one another. And all that shit.  

It wasn’t 2 years. It was a whole lifetime.

[cosmics-beings]

ugh so many megatron thoughts that i am honestly just too afraid to post but i have so many meta about him that i wanna write but im just afraid of how people will take them.

[creatingblackcharacters]

Lesson 1: "White Man Painted Black"?

Okay, I recognize that this is a strong foot to step off on! But! If you learn nothing else from this series, if you decide for whatever reason to forsake me: this is the ONE perspective I'd like you to take away!

You may have heard this quote before, when Black fans deride a character design as 'a white man with the brown bucket tool'. On its face, it means exactly what was said. But specifically, what it means is that we recognize that whomever designed the character drew the way they normally draw for a 'default' character in their mind- default usually meaning White/Eurocentric features- and they added a shade of brown within the line art to make that character now 'Black'.

Now if you're feeling defensive, wait just a moment! This discomfort is not inherently a bad thing!

I'm going to use both a 'real world' example first, to show you what your Black fans and peers are seeing, and perhaps you will also understand our discomfort!

(if anyone was curious, my folder for this lesson is titled 'brad' lmao and you'll see why)

(I'll have y'all know that I actually worked very hard to make Blackface Brad look mildly presentable lmao I'm sorry, I'm wheezing, I can hardly breathe looking at him 🤣)

You see how, despite knowing where this was going, and using one of the darkest shades of brown in my Skin Tones arsenal, you still know that that's Brad Pitt? That nothing about his hair texture, his lips, his nose, or really anything other than the palette change... changed? And you can still see that?

It's incredibly hurtful to be told that that's supposed to be you. You know it's not, you know why it's not, but rather than hearing how it makes you feel unseen and what they could do to be better (since they wanted to draw a Black character!), the artist lashes out at you.

And as an artist, you might have worked VERY HARD to do this! That might be a real handsome guy you drew!! But... is he really Black? Did you walk into it with the intention, that you were drawing a Black Character, or did you draw a character that just happened to be Black? It seems like a silly thing, but it matters!

Okay. I just finished laughing over Brad. Now let's get into some more perspective changes:

Now, imagine you drew a character. You want to make her Black, so you change the hair and skin colors. All right! You have your Black character... right?

Changed ONE feature about her? (You should obviously change more than one feature, but let's just go with the simplified example.)

What if, instead of just changing her palette, we changed her:

Hair?

There isn't nearly enough time in the world, let alone in this little scribble and blurb, for me to describe the IMPORTANCE of Black hair in Black character design. There are so many ways to do curls, afros, braids, twists, locs, SO MANY HAIRSTYLES!! Get used to searching in the 3C-4C hair textures!!!! I plan on doing an entire lesson or two on hair alone, but suffice it to say, Hair Texture is thee BIGGEST giveaway that you 'painted a white person Black'- from cartoon styles to realistic! It reveals itself in your writing as well- just based on how your character takes care of their hair, how your describe the texture, how other people might perceive it... it lets me know just how much research was done. Because we can have straight hair! But again, that's a conversation for a whole 'nother lesson so- come back later 👀?

Lips?

I love our lips, I really do. There's a long history of shaming Black women in particular for the way our lips look. So when I see them done in all their glory, it makes me very happy. Two-toned lips vary in shade and intensity, so make sure you're using references if you want to be 'realistic', but it doesn't have to be that hard. Even a little subtle shift like this in the design/story description lets me know that a creator was thinking about me.

Nose?

One thing I've noticed ever since I starting drawing is that... people in a lot of mangas/manhwas barely have noses! I admit, out of all the features on the face, the nose isn't the most important. I think they should be, especially when you want to emphasize that your characters look different! People have different types of noses! I especially want to gear this towards those with a goal of drawing realistic portraits and the like- there, the nose is ANOTHER dead giveaway. There are Black people with aquiline and straight noses- we aren't a monolith- but is that why you drew it? Consider why you went for that nose specifically. That's part of the intent, in all this!

Now, you might be looking at me and going "Ice... this is just character design". To which my answer is: Yes! It is! It feels so basic, and yet if you ask your Black friends/peers how often they've come across this feeling of not being properly drawn/written, from fanart to professionally produced works, it's unfortunately common despite how simple of a concept it is.

I hope that you can walk away from my first lil lesson with new eyes. Remember, it's the thought that counts, but the action that delivers!

[loveemagicpeace]

Some astrological things

Mercury in capricorn -they like sad sarcasm. Many times when they make a joke with that say things that they really mean but show it in a very hidden way. And they are also one of the signs that are not prone to long writing.

Sagittarius placements-they always do things with some kind of meaning. For them, everything has a deeper meaning, and if they are really hot for someone, they will write it off really quickly and effectively. They usually feel people through energy.

Water moons have a lot of emotions in them, which they always carry with them. Everything they do is related to emotions. They make a lot of emotional sacrifices for someone. And they always want to feel emotionally safe wherever they are or with whomever they are. Cancer moon is a very intuitive moon for spaces, they also feel the space they are in ,very strongly.

Mars in sagittarius in 12th house-your reactions are dramatic and emotional at the same time. It is also noticed that anger is often expressed through passion. Everything they do also involves passion and emotion. It is difficult for them to do something that is emotionless and has no soul.

Capricorn rising people & scorpio placements sometimes they can't imagine a relationship without it ending. Until they are 100% about someone, in their head they will always end it somehow. They will test your loyalty and dedication. How much are you willing to invest and give in a relationship.

Sagittarius placements in particular, I would say Venus and Mars are very passionate when it comes to relationships and will put their energy into a relationship, but if they feel that the energy is not returned, they will immediately remove the person from their life. They especially don't like it when they have the feeling that someone is going to leave them. They prefer to leave someone before they are left. While they may not be as vocal about this fear as Pisces is, they still do fear the day when someone — anyone — tells them they are leaving them, for good.

Cancer moon & Sagittarius moon-I personally think that water moons most belong to water moons (because that way they will feel the most understanding and receive the emotions they want). Cancer moon, in my opinion, goes very well with taurus moon because both moons will feel emotionally stable and safe. But these two moons (Sag & Cancer) can be very strong together. Cancer moon can make sagittarius moon feel that they are loved, accepted, have a home and can feel safe and familiar. They give them a sense of emotions and that they can express them and show how they feel in a more dramatic way. The Sagittarius moon can show the Cancer moon that everything that is foreign is not necessarily bad and that when you go outside your comfort zone you can see a lot. It can give them meaning and a new perspective. It gives a feeling of passion and excitement. For cancer moon , sag can be a little challenging in his relationship, but in a good way.

The sun represents the person and their individuality. The sun sign is a person until the end of his life. How you develop through life is also often shown by the sun and the house it is in. For example: Sun in Libra in the 9th house - you will develop through relationships with others and grow through the experiences you will gain. You will shine best abroad and you can meet many foreign people who will show you another side of life. This house is spiritual and also shows the meaning in life.

The sun in an air sign tends to develop a person through reason, insight, logic.

The Sun in an Earth sign tends to develop down-to-earth, practical ways.

The Sun in a water sign indicates the development, balancing and coordination of creative and emotional initiatives. They tend to develop a psychic, spiritual nature, which leads the individual deeper into the inner mind.

The Sun in a fiery sign represents development through enthusiasm, inclination and inspiration. Fire signs tend towards rapid and exciting development.

Sun in Pisces people remind me of a fairy tale.

The moon in the birth chart shows how men relate to women. It shows the imaginative side of human nature. Those born when the moon is waxing tend to be extroverted and those born when the moon is waning tend to be introverted.

Mercury refers to teaching, printing, paper, literature, mail, cars, bicycles, roads, business, commerce, goods, which means that it is always good to observe it. If mercury is afflicted, it produces insanity, drowsiness, vertigo, staggering, sleep cough, hoarseness and several nervous disorders. A person with Mercury retrograde is often very shy. If Mercury is in a sign ruled by Uranus, Saturn, Mars or Pluto, the individual will tend to act quickly.

Mercury is also related to rumors and by this you can see how noticeable the rumors are and what people are saying about you.

Mercury in a fire or air sign tends to produce healing powers because it allows the person's mind to focus strongly on the site of illness or problems. Subtract the number in which house Mercury is with the number 14 and you will get the house in which your opinions will have the most power.

Venus allows people to find common interests with others while Mars causes them to see differences. Venus also shows where you find fans. And where do you find the greatest love for people, places or things. Venus conjunct Uranus usually shows several fleeting relationships followed by separation.

Mars sociologically includes surgeons, mechanics, weapon bearers, policemen, detectives, fighters, criminals, robbers, thieves. Mars biologically symbolizes sexual organs, body heat, muscle tissue, red blood cells, bile, bladder. It also rules the head, face, left ear, burns, incisions, coffins, surgery.

The planet Mars has a lot to do with dynamic energy and lust and is considered the planet of action. It shows the need to recharge energy, complete, build, or destroy. The principle of Mars is conflict, so it is considered the planet of war.

Mars gives physical energy, stamina, drive, courage and enterprise and seems to work more positively in Aries than in Scorpio. People with a strong Mars in their chart are restless, decisive and tend to do things by themselves and for themselves. Mars shows a person's ability to lead the game and do things his way. They are often quarrelsome, rely only on their judgment, like to exaggerate their actions and emotions. People who have mono expressed Mars in their chart love freedom and do not like any interference in their lives.

Jupiter is the largest planet in our solar system. Wherever it is in the chart, there is a tendency for things to happen in a big way, in an expansive way, with optimism. If it is affected, the person's life shows exaggeration, too much trust, love for insignificant old people and contempt.

Jupiter also rules sports, hunting, athletics. It also rules love for animals, religion, marriage, philosophy. Regardless of the aspect, it is considered very lucky if Jupiter is in an angular house (first, fourth, seventh or tenth), because this saved a person from major accidents.

Jupiter in the 7th house is an indicator of multiple marriages. Jupiter in the 10th or 4th house indicates increased parenting. Jupiter in the 11th house means many friends. Jupiter in the 6th house brings expensive pets (which can be difficult to maintain). Jupiter in the 4th house indicates wealth due to inheritance.

-Rebekah⚡️🌶️🌊

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

Chapter 8: Jealousy Doesn't Look Good On Anybody Except...

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy.  This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters will fluctuate between past and present. This is chapter eight of my "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" series. (I'm so bad at summaries please forgive me!)

Word Count: 4.1K

Warnings: References to sex, Cursing (a few times), Drinking, Soldier Boy might be, is, really, absolutely, a little OOC,

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. Reader is described as "curvy" occasionally. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

The song they dance to is "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" by Russ Columbo and this should take you to the song. It's the song I named the series for, because I believe it encompasses how both the reader feels, but also how Soldier Boy will feel in a few chapters. I also believe that the song House of Memories by Panic at the Disco, fits the more modern parts of the series.

Internal Monologue is in first person and is in italics

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

****************************************

Philadelphia 1938

The lights twinkled along the ceiling of the dance hall as the gentle swell of jazz floated through the air. Couples swayed on the dance floor clinging to one another as the soft tones of the music soothed the dull throb of the whispers of rising tension overseas. It was a Saturday night, and you and a few of your friends from the Dawson School for Girls had slipped away to spend the evening twirling in the arms of whomever caught your fancy.

Well, at least that's what your friends wanted to do. There was only one particular man who'd caught your fancy, but he was nowhere to be seen.

The Dawson School for Girls was the answer to your mother's prayers, a boarding school in Boston, far away from Ben's "corruptive influence" as she put it. Ben was currently at boarding school number ten in Upstate New York. The last time you’d seen him was when you were on break and Ben had just left boarding school number nine for fighting with other students, but he wouldn't say what for. You’d sent him a few letters to tell him how bored you were including a few sketches and watercolor paintings, with minimal response, but it was like him not to write back.

You hadn't mentioned that Howard Stine had been coming on the weekends to take you out. Your mother was pleased with him, he checked all the boxes: wealthy, not Ben, educated, not Ben, from a nice family, not Ben, and of course most importantly, not Ben.

She was practically making wedding invitations and choosing the names of your children after only three months. However, it was nice to see her happy for a change, kept her from sniping at your figure now that someone was interested. Well, not sniping that much.

Howard was… nice, but he was one of the most boring people you'd ever met and he never understood why you always carried a sketchbook with you. When he'd taken you to Franklin Park one weekend, you stopped along the pond to sketch some of the ducks that were waddling on the bank, but Howard told you he didn’t have time to wait for you to draw them. Instead of telling him that he could just leave, you shut the sketchpad and continued to walk with him and quickly learned that it was better to leave your sketchpad at the dorm whenever he was in town. You also found yourself talking less and less, allowing him to fill the silence with his talk of the stock market crash and how the United States economy recovered due to the efforts of President FDR.

You hated that. You didn't recognize yourself when you were with him. You didn't feel like you.

And every time he was here all you could do was compare him to Ben. Ben would never tell you to stop drawing, yes he would tease you about it, but he always sat next to you while you were sketching, watching you work. You never understood that. Ben was so impatient with everyone else, but he was willing to sit with you for any inordinate amount of time if you were drawing while making you laugh the whole time.

I miss him so much.

"Can I get you a drink?" Howard puts his hand on the small of your back, leaning in to whisper in your ear. You try not to flinch at his touch. He had already been in town, walking you home from a dinner that was dominated by awkward silence and the clicking of utensils on plates when you'd run into your friends just as he was walking you back to the dorm. They had rounded the corner giggling and begging you to come with them. Despite your insistences for him to stay in and relax for the night at his hotel, he refused.

It meant that now you were stuck with him while all your friends got to twirl around with men that made them warm and giddy. Howard made you feel like you'd swallowed a lemon.

"I'm fine, but thank you." You force a smile.

Howard shrugs, before he walks away towards the crowded bar on the other side of the room and blessedly far away from you.

Your thoughts drifted to Ben. You missed your friend more than words could comprehend. Not just because you were far from your family in another city, but because it felt like you were missing apart of yourself when he wasn't there. You briefly wonder if he felt the same way when he wasn't with you.

Probably not.

You turn away from Howard's retreating figure, to watch the couples on the dance floor. You sway to the music, holding your arms around yourself and feeling your dark green dress swish around your ankles, one that you'd picked out yourself, not a monstrosity of pink tulle, but something that you believed accentuated the natural curves of your body that your mother used other dresses to hide. Your mouth turns down into a frown remembering how Howard had reacted to seeing you in it, when he tried to give you his jacket to cover up, but you refused.

You had wanted him to be stunned by how you looked in it, or at least, wanted someone to be. The same someone that was miles away and probably tickling the skirt of someone who caught his fancy.

"One of the most attractive men I've ever seen in my life is at the bar." Your friend Pearl stated looking behind you with wide eyes.

I've got you beat. You think to yourself to a sigh, wishing, again, that you were here with Ben instead of Howard.

"Very funny." You roll your eyes, thinking that she’s making fun of where Howard is sitting probably flagging down the bartender with both hands to catch his attention.

"I'm not talking about Howard. This guy is seriously a looker. And he's staring at you." Pearl says again.

"Sure." You continue to watch an elderly couple sway back and forth to the smooth jazz that ebbs from the band on stage.

Must be nice to be with someone for that long.

You watch how effortlessly the couple moves as one, how the man stares down at the woman with more love than you can comprehend. It makes your heart sink in your chest.

The way things were panning out, you were going to end up with Howard and you couldn't imagine looking at anyone like that other than Ben.

"You're about to see, because he's coming this way." Pearl takes a step back from you as if anticipating the stranger interrupting your conversation.

"He's not-" You begin to say, but you feel someone place their hand on the small of your back, turning you towards them.

"Fancy meeting you here." Ben smiles down at you, a playful smirk tugging at his lips.

"Ben!" Your heart soars when you recognize your friend and you can't help but hug him so tight he laughs, the movement of his chuckle makes you feel alive for the first time in weeks. The sharp smell of whiskey and the familiar spicy scent of his cologne greets you.

"Guess you missed me." The rumble of his voice vibrates where your cheek rests against his chest.

"I did." You pull away from him reluctantly. "What are you doing here?" You can't help but smile at him, probably wider than what was attractive.

"Thought I'd stop by and visit on my way back to Philadelphia. Saw you walk into this place. " Ben shrugs. "What are you doing out so late?"

"Looking for trouble." You smirk.

"You found him sweetheart." Ben leans down towards you making your throat get unusually tight.

"Hi." Pearl says interrupting the conversation.

 Ben turns his smug smile on her. "Hi."

"I'm Pearl." She looks from you to Ben as if trying to decide that it's okay for her to introduce yourself.

"Benjamin." You watch him slip into the cool and smooth Ben, the one that charmed whomever caught his eye.

You can't help but feel a prick of jealousy against your skin. It was familiar, but every time it happened, it didn't make any of this easier. You knew that you shouldn't be jealous, you didn't have a claim on him, you were friends, just friends, only friends, best friends…

And now you were with Howard.

You let out a soft sigh watching the way that Pearl looks up at Ben and the way he leans towards her with the confident smirk you love so much on his face.

"Would you like to dance Benjamin?" She asks.

"I would." Ben's smirk turns into a smile.

Pearl steps forward to reach for his hand, expecting him to take it, but he doesnt.

"Come on sweetheart." Ben reaches out and takes your hand, twirling you ahead of him onto the dance floor.

"Ben-" You giggle, head spinning with the movement, but when he twirls you back into his chest, you feel your breath catch. This wasn't the first time you'd been pressed up against him and it wasn't the first time you recognized how perfectly you fit together. Your soft curves molding against the hardness of his muscles as you sway back and forth to the music. When you were pressed up against him, you didn't feel like you were too big, you felt perfect, because of the way you fit against him.

"You know I am here with someone-" You say, before you get too wrapped up in how good it feels to be with him.

"Yes. Howard Stine. Though I do believe you said he stepped on your toes." Ben smiles at you, eyes twinkling in the light.

"That was four years ago, and he's… sweet?"

"Hmph." Ben rolls his eyes. "You can't even say it with a straight face sweetheart."

"I have never said anything bad about your companions."

"Missy-"

"Besides her." You frown.

He laughs at your reaction, the hand clutched in your right seems to warm with his smile. "You've never said anything about them period."

Because I hate thinking about how many of them there have been. Because I hate that you don't see me as someone who could be with you.

"I try not to dwell on your numerous escapades."

"You sound a little jealous doll." He smirks at you.

"What was that you were saying about Howard again?" You tease, holding on to his shoulders as you sway back and forth to the music.

"Can't be jealous of someone I've seen get chased by a duck." Ben's eyes trace your body for a moment. Your cheeks blush under his gaze. "You look nice. Not one of your mom's I'm guessing?"

"What makes you say that?"

"You don't look like a cupcake." He spins you away one more time before bringing you back into his chest.

"No. I think she'd probably have an aneurysm if she saw me wearing this. Howard also thought it was a bit much-"

Ben's hand tightens on your waist. "What?"

You shrug, leveling your eyes on his chest to distract yourself from his hand placement. "He tried to get me to wear his coat."

"He what?"

You shake your head to dissipate the self-doubt and body-shaming conversation that was about to unfold in your head.

"It's nothing." You raise your gaze back to his, but you're surprised to see the anger that burns behind his green eyes.

"It's not nothing. He had no right to-"

"Ben." You soothe, rubbing your thumb over his shoulder to comfort him.

The song shifts to something softer, forlorn, a song that reminded you of the heartache you felt with Ben, but also a melody that eases your soul somehow.

"I don't understand why you're with him." Ben sighs, but you can still feel the tension in his shoulders beneath your hand.

"My mother is happy-"

"But you're not." The look in his eyes is unfamiliar, almost earnest, as if he's trying to get you to understand something that he can't say.

"Ben." You breathe.

"Fine. I don't want you to think about him when we're dancing to our song anyway." The look in his eyes shifts back to the playful green they'd been before.

"Our song?" The words make your heart skip a beat and you can't help but smile at him.

You couldn't remember the last time you'd smiled this much. Probably the last time I saw him.

"Yes." Ben dips you back, before bringing you up against him, the playful look in his eyes becoming softer as you come back.

You know that your own gaze is filled with love and you remember watching the elderly couple. The way they looked at one another warming your heart as you gaze up at Ben. The three little words tiptoe against your tongue, the three little words that you'd been trying to say forever, but you can't. You don't want to lose him, don't want to live in a world without him, because you know that it won't be worth living.

So instead you lean forward and lay your head against his chest, in the space between his neck and shoulder as the song continues. You think that you feel Ben's arms tighten around you, pulling you further into his embrace, but you chock that up to wishful thinking.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" You hear someone yell, and all of a sudden someone's hand is on your wrist jerking you away from Ben.

What?

Howard is standing there his chest pushed against Ben’s, trying to look intimidating, but Howard's inability to reach Ben's shoulders made it difficult for him.

You rub your fingers over your wrist, where Howard’s bright red handprint stands out against your skin.

Ben’s eyes shift to notice your ministrations, darkening with the force of his anger at the thought that Howard hurt you.

“I think I was dancing with my girl.” Ben’s eyes narrow, skating back to Howard.

Your heart skips a beat when he says that, but you shake away the thought, knowing that Ben is only saying that to make Howard angry.

“Your girl?!” Howard sputters, his face growing red. “She’s not your girl!”

“Howie, buddy-“ Ben’s confident smirk slips over his features but you still see the anger beneath the surface. “Calm down, you’ll give yourself a heart attack.”

“Just because you think you have some claim on her because you’ve been stringing her along with the harem that usually follows you, does not make her your girl!” Howard fumes. “She’s with me.” Howard grabs your wrist again and drags you towards him.

“Hey wait a minute-“ You begin to say.

Ben grabs the front of Howard's tailored suit, rumpling the pristine fabric. “Don’t you dare touch her like that.”

“I will touch her however I damn well please! She's mine-"

The grip on your wrist is so tight that you know it’ll leave bruises. “Howard wait-“ You try again to diffuse the tension, bringing your free hand to rest on his forearm to make him let go.

“Shut up.” He snaps, eyes flashing back to you.

Ben’s temper flares and the sharp crack of his fist against Howard’s face echoes through the room. Howard stumbles away, letting go of your wrist as he reels backward to the welcoming hardwood floor that catches him when he falls.

“Don’t you ever speak to her that way you arrogant son of a bitch!” Ben shouts taking a step forward. His shoulders are tense, fists clenched at his sides and his jaw is tight, as his anger burns through the air.

By now the band has stopped playing music and all the couples around you are watching with wide eyes.

I have to do something before he kills him.

You put yourself between them, your hands firmly planted on Ben’s muscular chest so your back is to where Howard stands fuming. “Ben. Don’t.”

But he’s not looking at you, his gaze is locked with Howard’s, eyes blazing, muscles tensing beneath the palms of your hands. You try to ignore how good his chest feels beneath your touch.

Damn it.

“Ben.” You say his name again.

His eyes snap back to yours. The soft green has hardened to an emerald with the force of his rage, so different than how he looked when the two of you were dancing. But he doesn’t say anything.

“Please.” You whisper. "Stop."

Ben looks from you to Howard, before he finally exhales. “Fine.” He mutters, and he turns and vanishes into the crowd of people without another word.

A minute passes and the music begins all over again, the band on the stage starting with a lively tune that makes the couples around you to move back on to the dance floor, but the tension of what just happened remains in the air.

Because what did just happen? Did Ben do that because he was protective of me? Or did he do that because he was jealous?

Your eyes trace where he vanished, longing for him to come back, but when he doesn't appear, you're left to deal with the aftermath. 

********************************

After numerous apologies to Howard, he finally relented and took you back to your dorm, leaving your group of friends at the dance hall. You knew there would definitely be a conversation about what just happened between you all when they got back, but even you were confused. Ben was always protective of you, but what happened seemed over the top. You think about how Ben called you “my girl," the way he said it sending a thrill down your spine. He’d never done that before and you wondered if it was because he wanted to get a rise out of Howard or because he believed it.

Not like he’s tried to do anything about it. You think to yourself stroking one finger against your bruised wrist. The discoloration was more prominent now, black and blue marks beginning to sprout like flowers in spring. Howard’s eye didn’t look much better when he dropped you off. You were surprised that he’d been forgiving enough to continue to see you, not that you wanted to see him, but you didn't think you could handle a letter from your mother.

Then again maybe she would pull you out of this ridiculous school.

A small tap at your window causes you to raise your head to look out the glass. Ben is sitting there, but he doesn’t smile like he usually does. Your dorm room was on the first floor, which meant that Ben didn't need to shimmy up a tree to get into it like he did when you were home. Then again this was the first time he'd showed up here and you wondered how he knew where your room was. You also weren't thrilled at his appearance because you didn't know when Pearl would come back and you weren't sure what your roommate would do if she came back and found Ben in your room. She was a stickler for the rules and despite your friendship, rooming with her was one of your least favorite things about the Dawson School For Girls.

“If they find you here I’m going to be in so much trouble.” You say helping him through the small window, putting your hand on the back of his head so that he doesn't bang it against the glass. "You might like getting kicked out of boarding schools, but I don't."

“They won’t find out.” Ben rolls his eyes. He glances at Pearl’s empty bed on the other side of the room. “Roommate not back yet?”

“No she was still dancing when I left.”

Ben frowns. “Where’s the asshole?”

“Ben-“

“What?”

“He left. And I don't exactly invite him up to where I sleep."

“Good.” Ben flexes his fist.

“How did you know which room was mine?” You ask. Ben had never come to see you before at boarding school and the fact that he was here probably meant that boarding school number ten was out.

“I might have guessed wrong.” He smirks.

“Uh-huh.” You sigh, but all you can think about is how he acted earlier. Your feet shift back and forth “Why did you hit him?”

Ben’s eyes darken. “He shouldn’t have touched you like that or said that to you.”

You stand there for a minute observing his reaction.

“He kinda deserved it." You say slowly.

You knew it was true. When Ben showed up Howard shouldn’t have lost it like he did, he definitely shouldn’t have grabbed you like that or called you his-

You stutter on that thought. But maybe he is right. I am Howard’s. We’ve been going steady… The thought of being his makes something curl up in your chest and die. There was only one man that you wanted to belong to.

"Yeah.” Ben sighs.

"Why did you call me your 'girl'?" You ask.

"Um." Ben shrugs. "Felt right in the moment."

"What?"

"I mean you are. You're my friend-"

"But that doesn't mean friend Ben." You say it gently trying to catch his eye, but Ben won't meet your gaze.

"Fine. I just wanted to mess with him a little bit." Ben frowns. "But I didn't like that he called you his, or the fact that he hurt you."

“But Ben I am his.” You whisper even though you don’t want to. “We’re going steady-“

“That doesn’t make you his!” Ben snaps, eyes flashing. “Just because he feels the need to say it doesn’t mean it’s true.”

“But Ben-“

“And I never want to hear you say it.” He continues loudly.

What is wrong with him? I've never seen him this angry about anything.

“Why?”

“Because that means he has some claim on you. You’re not his, you’re my friend.”

"You're being ridiculous. You're saying that he can't have some claim on me but you're possessively calling me your friend!" You shout back frustrated.

Why is he acting like this? Does he really hate Howard that much?

"I am not! I'm just saying that you're my friend and you're not his!"

“I can’t be both?” Your words hang in the air between the two of you and you mentally beg Ben to answer. He was acting like he wanted you to be his, like he believed that he had some claim on you and you couldn't remember another time that he'd acted this way. Sure he teased Howard, but this was more than that.

It was almost possessive and it kinda scared you how much you liked it.

Ben doesn’t answer your question. His shoulders are tense, hands clenched into fists at his sides, while something lurks behind his eyes that you can’t identify.

“Ben?” You say it like a question, ignoring the urge to press your hands against his chest like you did earlier at the dance to calm him down.

His gaze drops to your arm, where Howard grabbed you, tracing the bruises and clenching his jaw together. Ben’s right hand comes to delicately pick up your bruised wrist, running his thumb over the discolored flesh with a frown. “Does it hurt?” He rumbles changing the subject.

“No. Does that hurt?” You breathe noticing his bruised knuckles and gently probe your fingers along them.

You hated the though that he was hurt and for you, no less.

Why did he have to intervene? Why did he hit Howard?

“It was worth it.”

You both stand there for a minute, with Ben holding on to your wrist, touch surprisingly gentle.

“I just don’t like that he hurt you okay?” He mutters raising his eyes to yours. You weren't prepared for the soft look in his eyes. You expected him to still be angry over Howard, but he almost looked, worried.

“I'm okay Ben." You whisper back.

You want him to answer your question. You think again about telling him those three little words you wanted to say when you were swaying on the dance floor together but you can’t.

He nods once before he looks around the room, eyes falling on your sketchpad where it lays closed on your bed. "Got any new ones?"

You knew it was Ben's way of asking if he could stay, trying to tell you that he didn’t want to go back to Philadelphia that night, and you didn't want him to either.

"A few. If you're not too tired-"

"I’m never too tired for you."

You feel your heart beat rapidly in your chest. “Okay.”

The whole time you sit together on your bed, Ben doesn't drop your wrist, in fact he continues to brush his thumb against it while you look through your sketchbook. And in a few hours when Pearl finds you and Ben curled up in bed together, you’re not embarrassed, because deep down you’re starting to believe that Ben cared for you more than he was willing to admit.

*******************************

Thank you so much for reading! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series, please let me know :)

Taglist: @roseblue373 @anundyingfidelity @cheynovak @cassiecasluciluce @muhahaha303 @deans-spinster-witch @kayleighmeister @demodemo909 @fruitfacess @bobbobbobinogs @bughill126

[allthornsnopetals]

Unrequited love

:Includes:

T.Denali

K.Denali

I.Denali

:T.Denali:

If her dead heart could shatter it would. She has been waiting for her mate for a millennium.

To find out that you would rather be friends, messed her up.

She was rejected by Edward, indulged in the company of others, which were purely sexual, and finally being rejected by the one.

Tanya is trying to understand why. She knew you were human, so you would never experience the magnetic connection, the pull, the yearning, and the instant clasp of your heart. But that would not stop her questions of why.

Why would you not want to be with her, as she wants to be with you?

In my perspective, out of all her sisters, she would respect your wishes. And even fight the urge to turn you, so you would be her mate, her forever.

She would question you, interrogate, and even ask if there is someone else. She just wants to know why you would only have her as a friend, especially after the—in her perspective, romantic experiences—experiences you have shared together.

"You like me but you do not love me?" Said Tanya, sounding defeated as she sat beside Y/n.

Y/n nods, staring at the ground, feeling horrible for rejecting her. "Is there someone else?" Tanya questions, find Y/n's gaze.

She shook her head, confusing the vampire. "Then why, not feel the same way as I do? I thought we were on the same page... I assumed you felt the same way as I do."

"Tanya, you're my friend... A very good friend. I was new to town, but you showed up and decided to be—what I thought, was my friend." Y/n explains, trying her best not to upset Tanya, knowing she's in a rather sore situation.

Friend...

It rang through her head. She never thought, she could be friend zoned. She's Tanya Denali, a beauty, a leader, and desirable woman, who was being friend zoned by her own mate. She would kill and die for the woman beside her, but she would only simply see her as a friend.

She distanced herself for a while, until the bond was tearing through her, like a heated blade cutting through her flesh.

Whenever she sees you it pulls her apart, but when she cannot, it kills her. In a sense she can't stand herself.

She curses whomever would listen for giving her someone she cannot have. For a while Tanya would feel hollow and not even her sisters can fix it.

But if you are in danger, she would never think twice to drop everything to save you.

Also, Tanya's a vampire. She has nothing but time, so she will wait until you come around. She would still flirt, pursue, and be with you, because to her this is a challenge, and she loves a good challenge.

She'll wait until you come around, and trust me, she has nothing but patience. It's Tanya Denali, leader of her coven, her patience is her number one gift.

:K.Denali:

Kate in my perspective, is very much: 'that's cute but you're mine and I'm you'res'.

She just gives me that vibe.

So if she finally confesses her feelings and you inform her that you just want to be friends, she's laughing her ass off, and most likely changing you right then and there.

Unlike Tanya, Kate does not give a fuck for your wishes.

The bond was set, the moment her eyes met yours. The magnetic connection fed her determination, her hunger, and her drive. Once Kate sets her mind on something, she will do anything to achieve it.

Once, she turns you the bond is set, making it impossible for you not to love her as she loves you. She just hopes that you could forgive her for changing your life.

Kate barks a laugh, doubling over, holding her middle as she finds your words amusing. "Kate, I'm serious. You and I are friends, nothing more." Y/n says, beginning to feel comfortable with her reaction, and perhaps a bit frightened.

Kate wipes a fake tear, slowing her laughter, coming to an end with a large grin. "Princezná', that is funny. You're hilarious, you should be a stand up comedian." She cups Y/n's cheeks, rolling her thumbs over her warm human flesh.

"But there is one thing that I know... It's that you and I were never destined to be friends. You are my love, and I am yours." She pecks her lips, rubbing their noses together, affectionately.

Y/n's heart beats rapidly, unable to recognize the person in front of her. Pulling away, she begins collecting her belongings. "You're right we were never meant to be friends. We should have stayed as strangers." Kate laughs again, taking Y/n's hand into her own.

"That is not how mates work. You'll understand once you wake, but I must warn you, it will hurt."

She strokes your hair, comforting you as you transform. Kate knew it would be a risky thing to do, but when it comes to her beloved, she can't seem to give a single fuck.

This is giving yandere vibes, but she's obsessed, and drunk on love. (and she didn't wait for so fucking long, just to be friend zoned.

When you do come back, do expect a bit of manipulation, and a lot of apologies.

She would spend her entire life apologizing for changing you, but she knows, that the bond has infected you as it did her, so it is only so much time until you're in her arms, forgiving her, and sharing your undying love for her.

She will be waiting with a shit-eating grin.

:I.Denali:

Like Tanya and Kate, Irian has been patiently waiting for her mate, for the one, for you.

So in my perspective she isn't going to take the news very well or at all. But unlike Kate, your request to be just friends isn't going to fall to deaf ears.

She has been following the law perfectly well, until she met you, sealing the bond... Sealing her fate.

So, your rejection does not settle well with her.

Irian would not be understanding, because to pursue you is to put her family in harm's way, to break the law, to bring suffering to herself and her coven.

Sorry, babe but you're not going to get rid of her.

She would make it seem that she took your rejection well, but internally she's burning.

If she knew that you rejected her because you're already in an established relationship... Yeah not anymore. You better say good bye to that fucker, because Irina has sent them to the darkness, aka death.

She would make it appear as if they left you. Abandoned you, packed up their things and left, and broke things off with you. Making you feel unwanted, heartbroken, and low in self-esteem.

Toxic, yandere style, but she's kinda fucking crazy and feral; (thanks @thegamingcatmom, for rotting my mind, I expect composition for my therapy, that you're accompanying me to, because there is nothing right in your head. If you need evidence, look at the stuff you publish... Well, the stuff I like... WHATEVER!!)

She would be there as a 'friend' to catch you and patch up any holes, that their absence has left on you.

She would even make you rely on her, making you believe that you should have chosen her, which is fine, because she would welcome your lost heart with open arms.

"I should have listened to you." Y/n wept, cuddled deep in Irian's arms.

Irian shushes Y/n, rubbing soothing circles on her back as they lay comfortably on her couch. "It's okay, Maličký. It is not your fault, it's his. He sucks for leaving you." She wipes her tears away with her sleeve.

"Did I do something wrong? Is there something wrong with me?" Y/n sniffles, finding Irian's gaze, her eyes filled with pain.

"No, not at all. There could never be anything wrong about you. Never think that way." She pulls her into her arms, pecking gentle kisses to her hair.

"Irian?" Y/n pulls away, looking her in the eyes. The blond psycho hums, cradling her face in her cold hands, and softly kissing her head. "You won't leave me, would you?"

Irian felt her dead heart squeeze. As if she could leave her darling behind. Her heart was completely devoted to her, far too gone for her to just leave her.

"I would never. I'll break if I did."

Faster then she thought, you're cradled in her arms, spending every waking moment with her.

She of course would never tell you, that she murdered your ex-partner, fuck that shit.

And once she has you, she's not waiting for permission to turn you. She can't have the volturi knocking on her door.

She would turn you, knowing that you would be stuck together forever, and would easily forgive her.

[utilitycaster]

Do you think that Laura and Marisha are deliberately making their relationship somewhat toxic and unsustainable or do you think they see the relationship as healthy? It is just so different from all of the other relationships they have been a part of and not really in a good way. Would love to get your perspective on it if you have one

I am honestly unsure. I would like to say it's deliberate. Prior to it becoming canon, in fact, I, and a lot of other people who were less than enthused by Imogen and Laudna's romance and weren't entirely sold from the start, made the case that we expected they would be talking to each other and would put together a compelling story, not the dull fluff so common in fanon. While whether it's compelling is a subjective judgment, we know for a fact they didn't talk to each other. We know for a fact Marisha was surprised by the question of "Can I kiss you," and Laura was surprised by the answer. We know from a 4SD not long after (4SD #16, Kiss and Tell) that several episodes later they still hadn't talked. We know that Marisha perceives Laudna as holding Imogen back (and that Laudna perceives herself as doing so) from the Rose City Q&A. We know that from 4SD #20 (Episode Twenty) that Laura doesn't like conflict in narrative and Marisha does, and that Laura was thrown by Laudna's regression following Ashton's attempt to absorb the shard (4SD #19, Shard Candy).

I don't know if it's deliberate or not; I don't have any extra insight that isn't public knowledge any fan can easily access. But man, it doesn't feel like these are two actors on the same page about what's going on.

I've touched on this before but mostly in tags or whisper posts but I've always felt ill at ease with a number of for lack of a better term "fandom-approved opinions" and one of the ones that has baffled me the most is this idea that Marisha and Laura have exceptional chemistry. I watched Campaign 1 knowing the endgame ships but deliberately avoiding the fandom, and Vex and Keyleth did not even once occur to me as a thing. I watched the first year of Campaign 2 without a ton of fandom interaction because I was avoiding additional C1 spoilers and it seemed crystal clear that the obvious ship was Beau and Yasha; it felt like Beau and Jester only even had enough potential for me to multiship it as my general "whomever Jester picks" for like, 30 episodes. And yet people - people who didn't even ship either of the above ships and in some cases disliked them- would just say "oh man I can't wait until we get to a campaign where we can finally explore Marisha and Laura's incredible chemistry!" and it's like. I feel like I'm the kid in the Emperor's New Clothes on this! I understand that chemistry is to an extent a matter of taste and subjectivity, but it just increasingly feels like people looked at two campaigns of tables where Ashley was frequently absent and said "well, if I want an F/F ship that's between two of the women in the cast, I guess this is what I have to work with" and repeated to themselves that a flat pamplemousse La Croix was a Piña Colada until they started to believe it. I mean if someone wants to explain it to me in good faith I suppose be my guest and I will try to take it in, but it feels like people just treat this as incontrovertible fact and if you doubt it they're like "don't you have eyes" and it's like, well, pretend I don't. Explain like I'm eyeless and five because I have never understood this. They both have more chemistry with every single other cast member; it's not all romantic but man, I didn't even buy Laudna and Imogen as platonic best friends of two years. I have never had this problem with any other pre-existing character relationships Marisha and Laura have played, platonic or otherwise. It's literally just them. I just never feel like they're quite on the same page.

Back to the relationship between Imogen and Laudna onscreen, this was easily the best conversation since the start of the gnarlrock fight, and it is my hope it doesn't fizzle out the way that did. You can't keep kissing Laudna whenever she fears she's lost forever to Delilah, Imogen. Or you can, but that won't fix the problem. Again: are you disgusted? Do you feel betrayed? If you're not, why did you say that? If you are, how will you move past it? Do you want to be with someone who never feels like they're good enough for you? Laudna, do you want to be with someone who, no matter what they say, you feel you're holding back?

Early in the campaign, my feeling was that of our current situation, switched - Imogen felt her powers were a burden and a curse and Laudna kept referring to them and to her glowingly. It's just...ships passing in the night, no pun intended here. I hope it's on purpose and whatever comes from it is a good story - and either a tragedy or a happy story could be a good one. But I have a nagging sensation that Laudna wants out but is afraid to say no, and Imogen is afraid to let go, and I honestly don't know if the actors have realized this impasse and how the characters might resolve it, one way or another, besides the insufficient bandaid of a kiss whenever the conversation gets too uncomfortable.

[leezlelatch]

There seems to be some discourse lately about content, the kind of content, and the community as a whole. Now, the last thing I want to do is stir up anything, but I had some thoughts that I'd like to type out, and I appreciate whomever decides to read it.

The purpose of this band is to make us happy. You've heard it time and time again, as long as we go home at the end of that show feeling just a little better, then TF is satisfied. And it seems like lately that happiness is hard to achieve here, on twitter, or wherever else one is active.

On Headcanon

Were you sitting at work today? Home? And suddenly that thought popped into your head, a little scene playing out about Copia, or Terzo, or Secondo, or Primo. A thought that filled you with excitement, butterflies dancing in your belly, which had you smiling because yes, in the world that makes you happy, that is what they are like. That is what they do. That is what they say. It's an amazing thing and it's good and okay, and you should be excited about it. Because you just added another chapter to the amazing story in your head. And you decide to post about it, but...someone left you an anon. Someone left you a comment. Someone vague posted. And it hurt.

This is happening far too often across tumblr, and it needs to come to a close. I understand that we all have vastly different ideas of who the Papas are and how the Ministry works, but that does not give a single one of you an excuse to say anything untoward or foul to anyone else on this platform. And this isn't talking about any particular group because more often than not, posts like this are used to justify the actions of others. You do not have permission to use this to further your agenda. Be kind. Choose to ignore that fic. Choose to stay off that person's blog. Stop making posts at the expense of others just because you don't like a particular aspect of their world.

I promise you'll still be able to sleep at night.

On F! Reader and x Reader Fic

I have seen many posts since I joined tumblr to write for the Ghost fandom that express a dislike toward reader fics, and in particular f! reader fics. I can't speak for anyone else, but I'd like to just reflect on my own thoughts on the matter, and once again, I appreciate the time taken to read and perhaps understand where I'm coming from, and know that it is a place of care.

I am a woman. When I write fic, I am writing it to satisfy my own little world in my head. So naturally, I am going to make the reader female, because the universal you is not only the friends I share it with or those kind enough to read, but the you is me. Every sweet word whispered, or gentle touch from a Papa is something I wish would happen to me.

I do not have the right to invade someone else's perspective. I do not understand what it is to be a gay man. I do not understand what a trans person experiences every day, and therefore, I do not feel like it is my place to write these perspectives in an x reader fic, or more so than that, in smut. And otherwise, I'm just not comfortable in doing so. I know my experience, and isn't the first step of writing, writing what you know?

I want there to be inclusivity in writing, but that doesn't start with attacking other authors for writing from their own perspective. It doesn't start with making hostile posts about reader fics, because what's the outcome? You just end up with some people very hurt and unwilling to post their stories because they think it's unwanted.

If you feel comfortable exploring these topics, talk to your mutuals. Say hey, what can I do to gain a better understanding of the content that I'm writing? What can I do to ensure that I'm not fetishizing due to my lack of knowledge? Be a community, and help each other out.

On Notes and Reblogs

A note is not the value of your writing. Whether you receive just a few or hundreds, you have impacted someone. Someone loved your story. Someone is thinking about your story all day. Someone was able to make it through because that one thing line you wrote spoke volumes to them.

We put so much of our energy into worrying about notes that the reason we started writing in the first place is lost. It becomes a chore. There are a hundred WIPs sitting in our folders because it becomes so goddamn painful just to work on one.

No one owes you a reblog. No one owes you a like. And even though it's nice, and it's gratifying to see nice comments on something you worked hard on, notes cannot be used as a currency between followers or mutuals. It just becomes a poison. Your entire tumblr experience is going to be marred by the constant worry that you aren't good enough just based on a number.

Learn to appreciate the ones who do read. Allow your story to make you feel good because there it is! That thing you've been thinking about. It's written down. You brought it to life. That is far more valuable than a tumblr note.

If you've reached this point, thank you. Everything you're feeling is good, and okay, and we're gonna get through. Because even now? When it feels like things are more hostile than happy? You still have Ghost. And you still have everything.

[burr-ell]

"the tendency of this fandom to only engage with what THEY want these characters to be#as opposed to what their creators are trying to do and the stories they want to tell" slap this on a bumper sticker, you just summed all cr discourse (about PCs at least) in 2 sentences

It truly is maddening (and it's not by any means exclusive to the CR fandom). The reason why the discourse always goes the way it does is that at the end of the day, the loud fanwanky people only see what they would do, if they were self-inserted into the story, as a valid choice; and they are, more broadly, fundamentally disinterested in what others think or feel. There are several examples of this, and the variety of spaces within the fandom that produce these ideas is an indicator that this isn't endemic to one specific group of people.

-Keyleth is an important character whose feelings and choices are validated by the other PCs and cast even if they still disagree with them, in spite of how she and her preachiness get in the way of the Murderhobo Jubilee? It's not because the cast are all friends and they genuinely believe Keyleth is valid and are interested in how these discussions and choices can guide the story. It's because Marisha is the DM's girlfriend, and also here's my totally unbiased theory that my pet favorite players Sam and Travis secretly hate Marisha and Keyleth.

-Vax's presence is still felt and nodded to in the post-canon VM oneshots? It's not because he was an important character who mattered. It's because Liam wants to make everyone talk about his tragedy because he has Main Character Syndrome. Scanlan Wishes for Vax to appear at the wedding? It's not because he cares about Vex or because Sam and Liam wanted a sweet tribute to Vex and Vax's relationship and by extension Liam and Laura's friendship. It's because Liam thinks Vex's life should always revolve around Vax, and Sam wants to enable him and jerk himself off as the one who facilitated it.

-Beauyasha and Fjorester become canon? It's not because the players wanted it and it happened naturally. It's because there was a secret behind-the-scenes push to "force" those ships to become canon instead, and like, Dani Carr is some sort of shipping puppetmaster who made the players do it, and "they" (whomever "they" is) decided to sink Beaujester or Widojest because it was "obviously" going to become canon before the pandemic hiatus gave them time to "make the corporate-approved ships happen".

-Beau and Caleb try to reform the Empire and dismantle the Cerberus Assembly from within? It's not because it makes sense for their stories or that people who would take this position regarding a corrupt government might have a valid perspective that differs from your own. It's because the people at Critical Role Productions LLC are all spineless neoliberal cowards who won't commit to real activism. The best activism, after all, is violent, and violent revolutions have always resulted in stable aftermaths, and the real world has never demonstrated that this mindset is foolish.

-Relatedly: Caleb doesn't kill Trent personally? It's not because the most poetic justice would be to deny Trent the thing he wants most from Caleb. It's because "Limo Brain" is too obsessed with tragedy to have the stones to do "what needs to be done".

-Asmodeus, DnD Satan, turns out to also be CR Satan? It's not because it fits with the cosmology and the lore; it's because Matt Mercer is too attached to the "establishment", and the Prime Deities should have actually turned out to be the bad guys because of my personal baggage about Western religion and Christianity they're a little mean to my blorbo sometimes.

There's a pattern here: fans had expectations that they'd built up for themselves after projecting and building up fanon and deciding what players meant before they explained themselves fully, and when the players strayed from that, they were derided for all manner of reasons. I think we're seeing that same pattern play out in C3 as the story progresses in a way that fans dislike, and in fact we have seen fanwank spread whenever someone does anything that interferes with personally catering to a) the favored ship and/or b) the favored philosophy. (Orym, Ashton, FCG, Percy, Pelor...all valid when they affirm the Fandom Opinions and all disdained when they don't.)

Don't get me wrong, I think there's a place for comfort stories that deliver a personal catharsis. And I'm not going to dismissively say "well if you want it so bad make your own" because, as an artist, I am very familiar with the fact that creating is hard and draining and sometimes you just need to consume instead. But when you become so wrapped up in yourself and your feelings to the point where your perspective is the only valid one, someone else's feels like a betrayal when it isn't. It's always "They aren't doing what we wanted and here's why they're terrible people because of it" and never "Hmm, why is this what the cast wants? Let's examine that."

This isn't a new phenomenon, but I think it ultimately stems from not assuming that other people can differ from you in major ways in good faith. There are a lot of reasons for that (some more understandable than others), but I think you rob yourself of the potential to enjoy something new when all you do is demand what you already want. No matter what you're doing or where you are in life, you tend to become a better and wiser person when you open your mind to what other people have to say, no matter how mundane the subject matter. Sometimes the stories people have to tell are challenging—and the only healthy way to deal with that is to engage with them on their own terms.

[honeesucker]

Pairing: ProHero!DynaMight | Katsuki Bakugo x Puppygirl!Reader

Word count: 4,244

Series Content Warnings: Slow start... Graphic Depictions of Past Abuse & Trauma Response | Profuse Usage of Pet Names / All-around Softness | Bakugo Experienced Work-Related Trauma (causing near deafness, being put on leave from the agency, PTSD) | Eventual smut™ (will be tagged in individual chapters - to include but not limited to KiriBaku, HybridxHybrid, Hybrid heat trope, sex toy usage).

Chapter Warning: just some good ole KirixBaku intimacy / softness in this one.

*Not proofread.

Previous | Next

Bakugo had spent the better part of the next three days after leaving the rescue facility overthinking everything – the layout of his apartment would need to be changed, for instance – made to be safer for a hybrid in a new environment until they adjusted, and also just add things for the hybrid to share in their new home – switching out his office to give the hybrid their own room (Bakugo read that having their own space is important from a mental health perspective, in general for anyone, even more so when healing from trauma). He had already cleared out the spare room, adjusting his own to fit the scant amount of a home office he had to leave the room bare, Bakugo wanted to make sure the hybrid could feel free to choose their own furniture, to fill the room with things they liked and wanted... wanted to make sure that whoever he brought home felt comfortable. 

Whoever, Bakugo mused, while an image of you snuggled into Kirishima made his heart clench tightly. That night he had wrapped up the tour and ended up in the common room to see the sight of you curled between his friend and the wolf hybrid... it did something to him – called to some part of him instantly in a way he had never known before... more than his innate desire to protect citizens as a Pro Hero – no, this was something deeper than that. His night was spent tossing and turning in and out of daydreams that bore your face, imagining more of a life than Bakugo knew to hope for – firstly because in his heart his greatest fear being that he wasn’t worthy of safety, of love, of comfort or anything else in a similar vein... he had been an absolute explosive shithead of a child, and while he grew from his experiences, he knew he was still as brash and sharp-edged as ever and his relationships with others over the years bore witness to that truth. The only exception being Kirishima – whose quirk hardened him to the world, and whose soft heart and unending perseverance lent him an upper hand with Bakugo... everything else after that came easy between them as it always had since they were kids, as their relationship grew and transformed into what it was today. 

Bakugo’s second fear being one that had him worrying his teeth against the skin of his bottom lip all night until the fragile skin tore, the copper taste of his blood turning his mouth sour – would you want to come home with him? He knew one of the introductory processes in the rehabilitation program was to match the hybrid with the person, and within that list of candidates was a choice: the hybrid held the final say in whether or not they wanted to be placed with whomever met the qualifications and requested their placement with them. 

Bakugo didn’t get to introduce himself to you that night, TetsuTetsu had carried your sleeping form back to your room after another ten minutes or so when the tour had ended and Bakugo had given a gentle shake to Kirishima’s shoulder. Kirishima – who observed a new look on his friend's face – watched as Bakugo watched you; his ears and cheeks were a dusty shade of pink, his eyes softer than he had ever seen them as his friend’s crimson eyes watched you disappear down a hallway.  

Bzzzzzzzzt. Bzzzzzzztttt. Bzzzzzzzzzztttt. 

Bakugo froze at the sound of the harsh vibration from his phone jarring the silence of his apartment and tearing him out of the hole his thoughts were digging him into. The device sat on the shelf by his entryway where he dropped it after coming in from his morning run, the gentle melodic tinkling sounds of his ringtone being drowned out by the phone’s assault of the wooden surface. He nearly blasted himself to his entryway and saw an unknown number on his caller ID, normally he would let it go to voicemail but a tug in the back of his mind was urging him to answer.  

“Hello?” Bakugo answered, and was met with a quick reply. “Yes, hello – I am calling for a Mr. Katsuki Bakugo?” 

“Yeah, you got him - whad’ya want?” Bakugo was used to randoms getting his number and was always prepared to handle anything... anything but the unexpected reply that came from the other end of this call. 

“I’m sorry to bother you Mr. Bakugo but after careful consideration I wanted to extend the good news that you have been approved for a hybrid license through the rehabilitation program and are free to come in anytime to discuss next steps.” Bakugo froze on the spot, phone nearly dropping out of his sweaty palm. “Mr. Baku-?” Bakugo cut off the query. 

“I’m here, sorry,” his mumbled reply came through, “my schedule is open. I would like to come as soon as possible.” Bakugo’s mind went blank as he made his way through the rest of the conversation on autopilot. He had an appointment the following morning to head back to the facility to begin his classes, as well as move forward in the decision of which hybrid would suit him after meeting those they gathered based on his lifestyle. 

Bakugo’s finger slipped across the screen as the call ended, typing a quick “Come over, please” to who he needed the most right now. A reply chimed backed but Bakugo didn’t look at his screen to read the message, just felt his body slip down the wall, his butt landing on the bench in his entryway. He didn’t know how much time had passed before he heard the melodic beeping of the keypad entry to his home being pressed and soon the door pushed opened to revealed an out of breath Kirishima. Kirishima, whose eyes went wide with worry as he made his way further into Bakugo’s home, closing and locking the door behind him before heading over to where his friend sat, pulling him up by his arm and leading him to the living room to plop down onto the large, plush couch. Kirishima seated himself behind Bakugo, who rested his head against the larger man’s chest, tucked under a massive arm. 

“Wanna talk about it?” Kirishima finally vocalized, breaking the silence as he traced gentle random patterns on Bakugos exposed skin around his neck and shoulders, occasionally bringing his hand up to card large fingers through soft blonde hair. A quiet “Mm” was the only reply he received and he just nodded, continuing to provide what comfort he could until Bakugo could settle his thoughts and speak clearly. “Did you get denied from the program?” Kirishima was afraid to ask, but he needed to help Bakugo navigate whatever feelings he was having and knowing the explosive blonde, his anxiety was eating away at him as the silence continued on. 

“No,” Bakugo finally answered. “I was approved for the hybrid license and have an appointment tomorrow to move forward with classes and introductions...” 

 “That’s great news, isn’t it Kats?” Kirishima’s tone was gentle and even, navigating a conversation when he was unsure of the blonde’s feelings; a grumble sounded against his chest with a soft vibration. “What’s got you worrying?” 

“M’scared,” Bakugo mumbled against Kirishima’s chest, “what if I never get better? What if I fuck up and cause the hybrid more trauma? If I can’t control myself and hurt them with my quirk, or yell too loud... what if no hybrid at the center wants to go home with me?” Kirishima’s head was swimming with Bakugo’s rapid-fire questions and all he could think to do was squeeze his large arms around the blonde (Kirishima knew that deep pressure therapy was helpful with some anxiety attacks) and pressed his lips against the top of the blonde’s head, drinking in the clean smell that he had come to know so well. Eventually Kirishima felt Bakugo relax in his arms fully, body going limp as each muscle, each limb, relaxed.  

“You can always ask for help when you’re doubting anything, Kats – you know I will drop everything to be there for you,” Kirishima started, going back to his earlier motion of tracing random patterns on Bakugo’s skin. “You will definitely have to be careful of how you act and react around a new hybrid, but I’m not worried about anything like you are – it's gonna work out a lot better than you think,” a gentle hum of a reply sounded, “and I’m sure you’ll find yourself surprised at how many hybrids would be happy to go home with you, and the center is super good at matching people with most unusually perfect hybrids... TetsuTetsu wasn’t my first choice, I worried over how similar we were at first but it all came together perfectly, and you’ve witnessed that,” Bakugo’s mind was still swimming, but the electrified panic that had set alight to his blood was quelled for now between Kirishima’s calm dissection of his worries, and the feel of his fingers over his skin and the steady thump thump thump of Kirishima’s heart beating rhythmically against Bakugo’s ear. 

It wasn’t long before Kirishima heard a small snore from Bakugo and smiled down at the way his face softened in his relaxed state. His mind mulling over how this intimacy between them was something Kirishima held dearly to his heart – sure they were close friends at UA, Bakugo often opening up to Kirishima more and more over the years, though nowhere near as much as he does now – actually asking for help – and they’ve also found comfort in each other physically through their natural chemistry and need for intimacy given their isolating lifestyles as they aged. Kirishima pulled the soft black throw Bakugo had draped on the back of the couch and pulled it over the blonde as he settled in, continuing to trace patterns along his back as the gentle thump of his heart and soft snores lulled him off to sleep as well. 

˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 

Kirishima awoke to the sounds of shuffling, and quiet clinks of glass when he opened his eyes to see Bakugo in the kitchen, black sweats hung low on his hips, hair still damp and lying flat around his head. Bakugo was sipped from a coffee mug as he scrolled through his phone. 

“Coffee is ready,” Bakugo mumbled out, a yawn threatening to escape as he took another sip. “Y’also didn’t have to stay with me Red, would’ve been fine.” Kirishima stretched, long limbs taking up space in Bakugo’s living room as he stood and made his way to the kitchen for the steaming coffee.  

“TetsuTetsu is with Denki, and as fine as I know you’d be you still shouldn’t have to be alone at a time like that,” Kirishima stated simply, and Bakugo appreciated it – knowing the red-haired Hero always meant what he said, never having to worry if his emotions, his worries, were too burdensome on his friend, or if he wasn’t worth the effort. Kirishima was a good person but he was also honest, didn’t waste his time or say things he didn’t mean – something Bakugo could always count on to reassure him. “Want me to go with you to the rescue facility today? I could call off patr-” before Kirishima could even finish Bakugo was shaking his head and protesting. 

“Nah,” he said, “I’ll be okay to go it alone today and don’t need you slacking on patrol either – it's shitty enough with me being out.” Bakugo’s frustration on being put on leave with light-duty was evident but Kirishima only nodded, knowing when to reply with words and when Bakugo was just looking to get something out. 

“Alright - I better get going then but shoot me a text when you wrap up and we can meet up after,” Kirishima said, stepping close to press a quick kiss to Bakugo’s temple as he set his coffee cup down on the counter behind him. “I mean it, Kats, send the damn text or you’ll find me at your door come the end of my shift.” Bakugo only snorted, cocked eyebrow and smirked as Kirishima returned the look with his own wide smile, before stepping into the entryway and grabbing his shoes and keys. “You’ll do great, Bakugo!” 

The silence that enveloped the apartment after Kirishima shut the door left Bakugo with an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach, the heavy lead weighing him down as he swallowed hard, rubbing his palms on his sweats as he made his way to his room to get dressed and make the drive via cab out to the rescue facility. 

˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ 

It was within the hour that Bakugo found himself back in front of the large expanse of greenery and sleek architecture that was the Musutafu Hybrid Rehabilitation Center. His anxiety still a heavy weight tied to the bottom of his heart, dragging painful minutes by as he made his way through the automatic doors, and was greeted by the same employee who was there the last time he visited for his initial interview. 

“Ah, Mr. DynaMight!” The cheery voice greeted, a bright smile accompanying it. “So happy to see you back with us! The Director is waiting for you in the same conference room as last time, just down the hall there and to your left – did you need me to walk you there?” 

“Nah,” Bakugo managed, starting to turn his body. “I got it, thanks.” Hina, Bakugo recalled, was just as cheery with his short reply and waved him off as she called after him to seek her out if he needs any assistance. Bakugo found the conference room easily enough, even after years of taking damage to his head in more ways than one, his mind and memory were still sharp. Bakugo knocked twice before hearing a soft Come in, and opened the door to see the Director thumbing through some paperwork before she set it down and welcomed him in with a warm smile. 

“Mr. Bakugo, so happy to see you again so soon,” she started, motioning the blonde to take a seat opposite her. “I was just finalizing the schedule for classes you need to participate in regarding this rehabilitation program, as well as what is required by our facility’s standards to ensure our hybrids are entering the right home with the right fit in an adopter. I have sent you an email a moment ago that provides a login for you to watch most of the informational teachings we require via an online classroom where you’d still be in touch with an instructor who will go over the information provided and how it relates to your hybrid ownership as well as the few in-person classes we require here at the facility. I have also arranged for you to join us as we’re hosting an informative event today, so it’ll be good for you to see a variety of our hybrids as well as have time to interact with them and get more of a sense of what we do here as well.”  

Bakugo and the Director had an easy chat as she led him down to the other side of the building, where he recalls being last time, where they were holding the informative open house with hybrids, staff and public alike. He already heard a gentle thrum of a musical beat, accompanied by the white noise of people talking before he rounded a corner to see the brightly lit room filled with people and hybrids alike. They door to the outdoor courtyard was also open, the fresh garden air pushing in and comingling with the scent of pastries from a food table a few feet away from the doors. Bakugo swallowed, palms clamming up at the sight of so many people, but as he and the Director walked through the crown, her even stopping to speak to a few people, no one seemed to spare Bakugo more than a lingering glance before their attention was moved back to the original subject. The director bid Bakugo goodbye as she was needed elsewhere in the event, but said he could stick around and engage as much as he liked before setting off.  

What felt like an eternity, but after a quick glance at his watch only turned out to be an hour and a half, of Bakugo moving about the room, engaging with the different setups and the information they were providing – he even entered a raffle for prizes he didn’t look closely enough at the list to see – Bakugo found himself with a soft piece of sweet milk bread in his hand as he headed out to the garden to get away from the noise and crowd. 

He had just seated himself on a short stone wall, a perfect height for a makeshift bench to lounge on, and taken the first bite of his bread before he felt a small pressure against his back on the lower right side, before he heard a soft sniffling sound. His initial instinct was to blast first, ask questions later but as his palm popped and sparked with the sudden contact on his back he decided just to turn around and intimidate with looks. 

What Bakugo didn’t expect was to see you. 

You in all your tiny glory compared to him. Soft, plush tail swishing behind you slowly as you continued to nose at his jacket, unknowingly being watched with a quirked brow from the blonde, admiring the soft little points of your ears atop your head – as straight as he had ever seen ears short of those that were cropped – which yours didn’t appear to be. He wanted to reach out and touch them but didn’t want to spook you from... whatever it was that you were doing right now. 

It was with one final sniff you decided to look up, tail having picked up to wag at a faster pace before your eyes met his, and instantly your whole body went rigid. Tail frozen, eyes wide. 

“M’sorry,” it came out so fast Bakugo almost didn’t register you said a real word, “smelled like Red.” 

“Red?” Bakugo parroted, before it hit him. “Big guy, red hair?”  

You nodded slowly, wanting to take a step back from the stranger but something about the smell he gave off beneath the familiar scent of Kirishima made you stay close, taking in small huffs of air, Bakugo’s sharp eyes noticing the tiny bunny-like twitches of your nose. 

“He’s a friend of mine,” Bakugo wanted to keep this interaction going, for reasons beyond his rationality, he wanted you to stay, “he was at my house this morning so it probably still smells like him a lot, hm?” 

“Friend,” you parroted back to him while nodding, a little lost in thought. “TetsuTetsu’s’a friend of Red.” 

“You like that annoying wolf, huh?” Bakugo chuckled at the way you gave a comically flat smile with a nod. 

“Yeah, kinda decided we were friends before I did,” Bakugo just nodded, carmine eyes watching you closely as he tried to keep his pounding heart under control. 

“Sounds like him,” Bakugo muttered with a dry laugh and watched as you hopped up onto the concrete wall next to him before hopping back down onto your feet, you were going between looking at him and the ground as you worried your bottom lip between your teeth, tiny little canines poking over in a way that made you look like a little cartoon vampire. 

“Can I sniff?” You finally said, and Bakugo’s brain short-circuited for a moment, not expecting that to be what came out of your mouth next. He didn’t fully know what you meant to sniff, but he simply nodded, taking any excuse to extend this meeting. Your tail gave away your emotions as it swished quickly behind you, the air making a soft whooshing noise in the fluffy fur. You stepped forward slowly before you found yourself pressing into Bakugo’s side, nosing along the front of his shift before you hit his armpit, scrunching your nose at the strong musk that surprised you with how pleasant it actually was. Bakugo stayed completely still as he eyed you, watching as you eventually made your way across the top neckline of his shirt, cold nose occasionally touching the skin of his throat, and then you did something unexpected – you picked up his hand and held his palm to your nose as well. “Hm,” was all you said every so often, sometimes quick and concise like you were confirming something, and other times it was a gentle hum like you were trapped in a faraway thought. 

“Smelling for bombs, pup?” Bakugo finally broke the silence as you turned his hand over in your own, nosing at his wrist with one final huff. You not catching onto the joke the explosive hero made because you appeared to have zero idea who he was. 

“M’not,” you said, plopping yourself down into the grass at Bakugo’s feet as you looked up at him with bright eyes, and a careful smile. “You smell like something I’ve smelled before but I can’t remember what.” Bakugo’s blood pressure nearly skyrocketing when he caught the whispered end of your comment, “smell safe.” He didn’t totally catch on to what you meant by saying that, but the fact you said ‘safe’ as a word synonymous with him, or at least his smell, made his chest puff up a little. The garden courtyard had darkened a little as the sun dipped below the roof, casting long shadows across the grass though you were still plopped in the last chunk of light.  

“Should you be back inside with everyone?” Bakugo asked, afraid that him bringing it up would cause you to leave before he was ready but he had nothing else to say that wouldn’t come off totally insane. 

“Don’t really like being around so many people,” you said, pulling fistfuls of grass up as you spoke. “Hana said it would be good for progress but if socialization means crowds, I don’t want it.”  

“Who’s Hana?” Bakugo questioned. 

“Counselor,” you said, “she’s always mine when I come back.” Bakugo stopped in his questioning tracks as that seemingly innocuous sentence hit him. When you come back. You said it so simply, like the regularity of your return was expected at this point for you. 

“Do you like coming back?” Bakugo asked, careful to treat in this unknown space with you. 

“Ah,” you eyed him sheepishly, before refocusing back on the grass you were gouging up from the ground. “I don’t mind being here because everyone is nice even when I’m not,” he watched the corner of your lips quirk up in a small smile, but your eyes looked so sad. “I would rather just stay here if I'll always end up coming back.” 

“Would you give going away another try if it happened?” Carefully. 

You eyed him, not with suspicion or anything else, just took in the way he was watching you, the careful tone of his voice. “Red has TetsuTetsu, so he can’t have me.” You said it in such a way that Bakugo was left stunned for a moment before he recognized what you were saying beneath that. 

“Would you want to go to a place where you see Red and TetsuTetsu more?” Carefully. 

He watched as your brows furrowed, taking in his question for what it was before answering, “mm, that would be nice.” 

Bakugo was going to ask one final question before both of your attentions turned to the open facility doors where a staff member was calling out for you.  

“There you are, little puppy!” The girl’s sing-songy voice grated in Bakugo’s ears but you just jumped up and dusted yourself off, the girl at the door stating it was time for your dinner, calling to the events end as well. You had turned to watch as Bakugo stood, towering over you.  

“Thank you,” you had started your walk back to the door, when Bakugo had called back what you were thanking him for, “for letting me sniff you.” 

“Anytime, Pup.” Bakugo’s heart was crashing against his chest wall as he watched you retreat inside, thinking what a weird thing to be thanked for, but the fact that he provided you with something that it seemed you wanted, he was only happy to oblige. 

He had made his way inside where the Director was saying goodbyes to some people making their way out, and directing staff to put things away a certain way before he spotted Bakugo and smiled her bright smile at him. 

“Mr. Bakugo, glad to see you still here!” She beamed, in between her interaction with Bakugo she was barking out orders like a good leader does. “Did you find anything enlightening at the event?” 

“I did,” Bakugo started, telling her all he had done that afternoon, the information that surprised him and even his impromptu raffle entry to which the Director gave a surprised smile. That made Bakugo wonder what the hell he signed up for before he caught sight of a familiar tail walking down a long hallway. “I did want to speak with you, Director,” Bakugo rushed out, nodding his head to get the Director’s attention down the hallway where you and the staff girl from earlier were. “I would like to know more about that hybrid in particular.” 

[nico-esoterica]

I personally find it empowering to experience fame, fortune, limitless success, and ability to create my dream world with whatever and whomever I want without being victimized because I 'climbed too high' and that 'power is evil.'

When you walk into these rooms knowing that you hold the advantage, whether it be in sensing who to avoid or changing your perspective, you're granting power to yourself. Power bestows access, resources, and control over the narrative.

You stop being intimidated or frightened by 'the haves.' They'll be who you expect them to be and you'll be immune to manipulation and psychic warfare based on appearances or leveraging. You'll encounter the right people at the right time or who needs to play that role when you show up. By writing the plot, you avoid becoming a device in another person's story.

I want to empower people to command these echelons with brazeness and an indestructible will to prosper regardless of circumstances.

Choosing power doesn't make you corrupt. It makes your happiness defiant :)

[lionheartedmusings]

i saw a post earlier that q!tubbo is the only "moral" character even after purgatory and it's kinda kept me awake, not because i don't agree with the sentiment (i do) but because the idea of morality as intrinsically important in fandom / character analysis is fascinating to me, *especially* when we're talking about the morality of someone who's basically just spent two weeks in some eye guy's budget hunger games.

first off, while i fully agree that by the end of this q!tubbo *is* a character that tried at every turn to be kind and generous even to his own detriment, how does that make him more or less "moral" than q!phil or q!fit? he still killed, the same as them. he still strategized to beat his friends, has blood on his hands — why is he marked above x, y, or z in the moral scale?

well, one could argue that he did what he did for his team, for the eggs, and because he was forced to when he was put in the game in the first place, yeah? it's not his fault he's in this position, and he's doing his best to survive it. i personally think that's totally valid and justifiable, but it leaves a huge elephant in the room.

what about everyone else?

i'm going to use q!bad as an example because he's my main pov, and before i go into this analysis i want it known i'm very much playing the devil's advocate and illustrating a point — i am not saying his actions are "good". good? good.

okay. so, q!bad. here we have a non-human father who was told by his missing child to win regardless of the cost, or whomever he had to run over. he had to win. is it immoral then for him to take that to heart and play the game the way it was presented? is it immoral for him to kill for his child, or to be determined to win even in detriment of others? to want to use the same strategies in the battlefield that everyone else would, even if they're not kind or polite?

i don't fucking know, because morality isn't linear — this situation *isn't* linear bc if people will go on the record saying they would kill for their child and are praised for it, what makes q!bad's actions in the universe he's existing in any different?

you can even say that by some perspectives, q!tubbo extending so much kindness to his competitors over and over again was at times (or could've been) detrimental to his team ergo their childrens' lives and yet he still did it. is it more moral to save children or be nice to someone else?

my point being, i feel that the morality argument while very very interesting is kind of irrelevant bc when push comes to shove, characters aren't compelling bc they have more or less morals — i genuinely think a lot of media / character consumption has *actively* been harmed by everyone's need to have the thing they enjoy be "good" or "moral" or "right" bc if it isn't, what does that say about us?

the answer to that one is: absolutely nothing, but man do i think sometimes people in fandom feel guilty if they like or prefer an immoral or grey character vs a "stereotypical" moral one.

anyway, all this to say that i think by the end of purgatory, q!tubbo is the character that was most true to himself and his values from start to finish, and it's been a great watch. is he the most morally correct? eh. who the fuck knows.

[arliedraws]

I find it many things weird in Harry Potter, in general the plot holes are everywhere and things when you think about them just don't make much sense, even in storytelling perspective, and consistency.

One thing that I find appalling is how Sirius didn't notice the scarring on Harry's hand, from Umbridges lines. It's established canonically they're lasting scars. Sirius already had to watch from the literal shadows how Harry was enrolled in that tournament, already fearing for his godsons life bc he suspected Voldemort was involved. How couldn't any responsible guardian, not notice Harry was physically abused, again, under Dumbledores nose, but away from Sirius direct influence to be able to do anything. Then on top of that, Snape is gonna to do the occlumensy lessons, and while Sirius knew that was necessary, I mean, he was outraged when he heared Snape stopped it, but ok, he let it all slide? If I were Sirius I would have pulled Harry out myself for that year, enough is enough. If Dumbledores presence didn't prevent Harry's suffering, in fact his choices add to Harry's real physical abuse (Dursleys, certain teachers). Sirius could educate Harry theoretical until Umbridge was gone. Harrry was save enough in Grimmauld during christmas and the summer so why not.

Its like those I mustn't tell lies scars only are there when needed and then forgotten during times of the plot supporting characters might have reacted to them, like Sirius or whomever. Sirius is a genius wizard but can't turn into an unassuming anonymous figure to go outside, like Hermione did to Ron's features with just her wand and spells in b7, negating need for polyjuice, it's his dog form or permanent housearrest (which leads to disintegration of his mind /character and then he dies)

At some point I'm really suspect this is character driven anymore and just JKs incompetence to consistently implement Sirius's character. Like you already said somewhere here, he is a miracle character. Too clever, too bright, too loyal to continue in the story JK wanted to tell like you said somewhere before. I have a feeling JK didn't know what to do with Sirius, denigrated him and his character and then killed him off. His best role at the end to fulfill is to reinforce Harry's suffering and loneliness it seems, while Sirius actually was the main hope of Harry in the heart of the series. So meaningless!

While I love character metas, I think JK is a meanspirited woman, I always had that notion bc she reacted in some ways, even before the whole modern eh, shenanigans. And that meanness, pettiness and inconclusive attitude reflect in hps worldbuilding.

I agree with several points here!

If Sirius had been in a better mental space, I agree that he would have noticed the scars from the blood quill. However, we could also interpret this as Sirius being exceptionally depressed. Now, I’m not defending JKR here, but one thing we do have to remember is that Sirius was a convicted murderer and Harry’s legal guardians were the Dursleys. Sirius literally has no say in what Harry does. Sirius is not a person with rights—in the eyes of the law, he is due to have his soul sucked out. Anytime Sirius makes a decision on Harry’s behalf, it’s a courtesy thing, not a legal guardian thing. Unfortunately. It’s gross to say, but legally, Molly has the same rights as Sirius to tell Harry what to do—which is, gross.

Also, sure, Sirius could go out of number 12 in disguise but he’s in hiding because he knows he can’t risk his own safety for Harry’s sake. Dumbledore has made it very clear that Sirius is not to leave, and frankly, by the way Harry believed he had to rescue Sirius, this was actually probably the right call. Sirius is the most important person to Harry (and likewise), and if Sirius were taken captive by either the Ministry or Voldemort, Harry would done something unwise (which…he did). I’m not arguing that this is how it should have gone down, but theoretically (if you ignore the importance of mental health and stability lol), this should have been the right call.

But the point is, Voldemort’s ability to manipulate people and destroy friendships is what killed Sirius. Voldemort manipulated Dumbledore who thought he was smarter than Voldemort; Dumbledore prioritized keeping Harry alive but sacrificed Sirius in the end. I do think JKR punishes Sirius for being smart and attractive (lol), calling him rash when he’s really…not, but I think it’s important to recognize that even the smartest, most caring people can make mistakes and overlook the pain of the people they love most.

I think Sirius is partially in denial about some of Harry’s struggles. As a man of action, Sirius’s inclination is to fix things, and when he cannot fix in the way he believes is necessary, he shuts down. He comes alive at the end of OotP when he is able to help in the way he wants—and then JKR kills him for it lol.

Anyway, just some thoughts. I don’t actually think Sirius was behaving out-of-character, but I think JKR was unmerciful in putting this fictional character into situations that brought out the worst in him because it served the plot. Just my two cents though!

[askblueandviolet]

Hello! Welcome to the Blue and Violet Ask Blog!

As you might have guessed, this is an ask blog where you can ask the Mayor (Blue) and Macaque (Violet) from LMK questions! However, before anything else, there are a few things that you need to know.

General Things:

First things first, if you are not aware already, this blog is not based 'completely' on LMK canon! Instead, it is directly based and linked to the Blue and Violet Fanfiction series on AO3. Written by yours truly, me (haha!). Link to the fic series is in the bio/under the header. If you want to ask questions, please make sure you are up to date with all the chapters in ALL the fics in the series. (Also by the way YES THIS IS SHADOWPUPPET >:DDDD. If you don't like it and have a desire to assert your opinion regarding that? Then please, I kindly ask that you do not interact with this blog for your sake, my sake, and for the sake of everyone else who might want to enjoy this. Thank you :))).)

What this means is that the only things that Macaque and Mayor have experienced is within the context of this fanfiction series (which contains lots of establishment of how they know each other and their perspectives during seasons 1-3). Therefore, you definitely cannot ask these two about season four related things, because it hasn't happened to them yet!

Due to this, this blog will follow the timeline and events of what happens in the newest instalment of the series, 'Winter Mornings, Summer Nights' (previously, it was 'Colours'). After every chapter is posted, you will be able to ask Macaque and Mayor questions relating to what had happened to them in that chapter or any events prior in the fic series.

IMPORTANT: Whatever happens in this ask blog is NOT canon to the fic series. However, what happens in the fic series directly affects this blog. This means that nothing you ask or say on this blog will affect the Blue and Violet storyline.

Rules (or just... things to remember?) Regarding Asks:

I think I will be able to answer every question that you all submit. However, if I find a question too offensive, too uncomfortable, too strange (meaning I just don't understand it :'D) or something that will potentially spoil the future events of the fic series, then I will have to unfortunately ignore the ask. Either that, or I simply answer the ask with a silly picture of some sorts. On that note, please don't ask any character or me what will happen next! They probably don't know either! You'll all just have to wait and see ;D.

You can ask both Macaque and Mayor any questions you desire. However, I would highly recommend with each chapter posted, we stick to asking questions to whomever the new chapter's POV is in!

Also, if you wanted, you could also ask side characters any questions you wanted! Like Baihe, or any one of my OC's for Mayor's side of the story. But, keep in mind that this is technically a Shadowpuppet ask blog XDDD thus, they should be the main focus.

Not only can you ask the characters questions, but you can also just ask me questions about the series in general? Or just... Say something I guess? I've had people do that on my main blog, and it always makes me happy to see that people like what I am writing!

I will be honest, I am not expecting many asks to come to this blog. But, on the off chance I am overloaded with asks, please know that I can only work so fast! If it really does get too much I will temporarily shut the ask box, but I will make sure that every ask is answered to the best of my ability (Update: I look back on this statement and I realise oh how so very naive I had been)!

IMPORTANT: As of right now, it seems I should be able to answer one-two questions per day (although it could be less frequent due to potential circumstances in the future) so keep that in mind!

After experimenting with the ask box I have decided that the box will be open for 24 hours whenever it opens! This is just so that people from different time zones can like, have an equal chance to get something in if they want, haha. No cap limit on the box for now, just go wild!

Master List of Asks :D (WIP)

Key:

💙- Mayor

💜 - Macaque

🩷 - Baihe/LBD's Hostess (because of how many times she appears, she deserves her own key, haha :DDD)

Colours

Chapter One Asks 💜🩷

Chapter Two Asks 💙

Chapter Three Asks 💜🩷

Chapter Four Asks 💙

Chapter Five Asks 💜(🩷)

Chapter Six Asks 💙💜🩷

Chapter Seven Asks 💙💜🩷

Chapter Eight Asks 💙

Chapter Nine Asks 💜🩷

Chapter Ten Asks 💙

Chapter Eleven Asks 💙

Chapter Twelve Asks 💜

Chapter Thirteen Asks 💙

Chapter Fourteen Asks 💙💜

Winter Mornings, Summer Nights (Announcement Post)

Chapter One Asks 💜

Chapter Two Asks 💙💜

Chapter Three Asks 💙

Chapter Four Asks 💙💜

Chapter Five Asks 💜(💙)

Chapter Six Asks 💙💜

Chapter 'Seven' (now Eight on AO3) Asks 💙💜

Chapter 'Eight' (now Seven on AO3)💙💜🩷

Chapter Nine 💜(💙)

Chapter Ten 💙💜

Chapter Eleven 💜🩷

Chapter Twelve 💙💜

Chapter Thirteen 💙💜

Chapter Fourteen 💙💜

Chapter Fifteen 💙💜

AND THAT'S IT! I... think? This post will update as time goes on the more and more I learn how to help this blog function to the best of its ability. So please check this pinned post every time before you ask a question :DDD.

[matt0044]

So... where are we precisely on Vivziepop?

I don't want to make... assumptions of anybody's specific intent but the recent rumblings of discontent seems to follow certain patterns that I've become... a touch too familiar with.

Thing becomes popular to an unprecedented degree. Fanart, fan edits, maybe even full on fan music videos. Might be because the creator had made a name for themselves or they just got lucky right out the gate. Either or.

Thing grows in popularity in ways listed above and has its praises sung for a variety of reasons. Many of which may pertain to how certain social demographics are portrayed compared to elsewhere or whatever came before.

Thing had continuous installments that built on and craft a narrative for the characters portrayed with revelations galore. Certain aspects are revealed to be more... complicated.

Said aspects intrigue fans by having more than meets the eye while... souring others due to their first impressions, feeling their initial takes were "retconned" at best or "deficated upon" at worst.

This... disenchantment as it were results in alienated fans becoming more critical of the story and characters. Some of this revolves around certain types of characters being scrutinized in how they don't measure up to who the story appears to be focusing on most.

Something like queer representation is called into question when the female cast feels... off in retrospect.

The setting may be established as a less than morally conscious place to be and have the residing characters be hot messes as a result. However, some actions and choices of words may come across as a step too far lest it be a reflection of the writer/creator's beliefs.

This coalition of criticism may be met with pushback from those who dispute much of their points. Sometimes it's well worded and brings up new perspectives. Sometimes... it's largely could be just "Aw, shaddap!" on repeat.

Unfortunately, neither side (oh boy...) has a monopoly on assholes that put their emotions first and pleasantries second. The critical side will cite the stans as the reason why they exist and that "it's okay to be critical of the things you love." But some of the more overzealous members of that side may make you wonder, "So... where's the love?"

These overzealous members in question may often voice their discontent with various blanket statements and take counterpoints to that as being from stans who can’t take criticism. This often exhibits a mentality that because they’re calling out “the bad thing” and “the bad creator,” it’s end of discussion.

The creator may feel prodded to throw their hat into the ring not just over their creation but over what people try to construe them as purely based on their art. Sometimes they can come across as overtly defensive and averse to criticism themselves but with how much bile seem to be slung their way, it's never as clean cut.

Among the detractors who do care and want to approach in good faith, you have outrage merchants and outrage addicts that do in fact only want to stir up drama. Rather than help solve anything at all, the former wants to sell these stories TMZ style while the latter wants something to be angry at to feel in control of... anything. These muddy the waters for whomever might be hoping for a more productive discussion.

Adding fuel to this fire nobody actually asked for at those who have always disliked the creator be it for past works or as of recently due to word of mouth. Because a lot of their art revolving around what point number seven goes over, there's a very Anti-Shipper mentality of hating the "bad thing" on principle. Especially when the work is purposefully incorporating tasteless elements that this circle of "fans" feel should be avoided period.

I could go on and on but the point is that I've seen this dance routine more than a few times before where Popular Thing(TM) needs to be "taken down a peg and nobody can stop trying one up the other before it escalates.

Now more than ever with smaller indie projects like for animation. It's so hard to take certain people at their word at times because they either operate with a limited perspective or are willfully ignoring other points of view to feed their feeling of betrayal.

They comes of as jilted ex-partners who despise that the one that broke their heart's been able to move on. There's a sense of, "If I can't like it anymore, nobody can."

[socalledsomethingorother]

just finished reading another bkdk masterpiece so i wanted to compile a list of my favourite bkdk fics! all of these authors are incredible!!

a promise (2k words) - katsuki and izuku get a chance to talk before the final war. every time i read this and see that it has hardly any hits or kudos i get offended because this is one of the most beautiful representations of katsuki and izuku’s characters. i love this, so much. it could be drawn out and considered canon and i wouldn’t be able to tell that horikoshi didn’t write it.

#letdekusmash + @/fuckmeupdeku (22k words total) - a news site gives deku some bad press. luckily there’s a thirsty stan account to back him up. who could be running this account? (it’s katsuki) this has been my comfort fic for years. it never fails to make me laugh and it’s just auagsgahsh i love it so much!!! also i reccomend reading fuckmeupdeku first, it’s the one from katsuki’s perspective. i think it makes reading izuku’s perspective that much funnier.

chasing stars underwater (52k words) katsuki has to go undercover for a mission and his death is faked. izuku grieves over katsuki’s “death” while falling in love with his undercover identity. NO FIC HAS REWIRED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY QUITE LIKE THIS ONE. IT HAS EVERYTHING. IT’S GOT IZUKU. IT’S GOT KATSUKI. IT’S GOT KATSUKI AS A FASHION DESIGNER. IT’S GOT ANGST. ITS GOT AHDHUSVAVDBSBBEBEB I CANNOT PRAISE THIS ONE ENOUGH

deku, enchanted (94k words) izuku is hit with an obedience quirk and is forced to do whatever anyone tells him to. it gets quite awkward when katsuki constantly tells him to “go fuck yourself.” OH MY GOD THIS ONE. THIS ONE AUSUUSGSGDGSGHSGDGDGG. THIS AUTHOR AGAIN. AMAZING. THE ENDING STILL GETS ME.

improbable (75k words) izuku and katsuki meet anonymously in a discord server and talk 24/7. they have no clue that they’re actually talking to each other. THIS FUCKIGN AUDUSUGSGEGEHEHGEGEGEHEHGSVDVSGSHDHHDHDHDHDBDBBEBSBDBDHDH EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS WAS AMAZING. THE NICKNAMES. THE WAY THEY FIND OUT ABOUT EACH OTHER. THE ENDING. THE MIDDLE. THE BEGINNING. THE EVERYTHING.

off my chest (9k words) deku vs. kacchan pt. 3 and it’s pure hate smut. UAGHTHAGAHH AGAIN. ONE OF THE BEST PORTRAYALS OF THEIR CHARACTERS. MY FAVOURITE SMUT FIC. I LOVE THIS ONE MAN.

i’ve found hope in a heart attack (92k words) katsuki has a cancerous brain tumor and deals with it in the most katsuki way possible. THIS ONE HURTS, FOLKS. but man it’s just. it feels canon to me like this just feels like a “katsuki gets cancer arc” of mha. it’s written so beautifully and man. it hurts. a lot.

and now a section dedicated to my favourite author sapphicpandabear who writes pure amazingness every time even though they’re constantly writing. i admire them so much!!

heroes on ice!!! (71k words) a yuri on ice x my hero academia crossover in which katsuki and izuku are a part of a program where they’re taught by quirkless pros. along with those two, a few other members of 1-A visit hasetsu, where they’re challenged to create a short program figure skating routine. YOU CAN FIND MY THOUGHTS IN THE COMMENTS OF EVERY CHAPTER BUT ITS MOSTLY KEYSMASHES BECAUSE I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FIC AND THAT LOVE SHORT CIRCUITS MY BRAIN

break my heart (ongoing) izuku and katsuki haven’t seen each other in years, but they’re forced to work undercover together as a very sexually active couple. I GOT THIS AS A GIFT ITS LIKE PANDA READ MY MIND BECAUSE THESE ARE ALL OF MY FAVOURITE TROPES AND AUGH THIS IS ALREADY AMAZING

1 thru 5 (26k words) katsuki and izuku enter a friends-with-benefits type relationship and use a level system. I GET SO HYPED FOR SMUT FICS THAT HAVE A LOT OF COMMUNICATION AND THIS ONE DELIVERSSSS!!!! this was also gifted to me so ty ty

quirk entanglement (4k words) mina gets a bag of chocolate and each piece gives whomever eats it a random quirk effect. izuku gets an aphrodisiac quirk. i just love whenever mina is chaotically involved in things lmao

canada is too far away for this bullshit (12k words) while overseas, izuku sends katsuki a photo that happens to have a…toy in the background. katsuki goes insane about it. AUGH THIS ONE IS GREAT TOO!! also super funny lolol