#and puns

[frownyalfred]

I wanna see a fic where the Batkids realize that no, Matches Malone isn't just their dad's crimesona. He was a real dude who committed suicide, and Bruce committed identity theft for a mission and then proceeded to... not stop committing identity theft. Like, it legitimately sounds fucking insane when you actually hear it

Bruce: "You've never heard of the sunk cost fallacy?"

Jason, leaning about Matches Malone's origins in detail for the very first time: "Did you -- did you just make a joke?"

Bruce, deflating slightly: "...Matches likes jokes."

Jason: "Oh my GOD--"

[waitingtobebroken]

GO fanfic idea No. [REDACTED]:

Crowley works in the city council and deals with issuing permits. Aziraphale comes EVERY. SINGLE. WEEK to apply for a different one. It's very annoying but Aziraphale is cute and funny and so he doesn't really mind.

But just as Crowley is gearing up to ask the cute angel on a date, the permits turn... strange. Suddenly, Aziraphale is applying for things like a sex shop licence and an environmental permit. Skin-piercing treatments permits but also a work permit to employ a child.

And Crowley has to decide if he wants to notify the council or continue flirting with the prettiest man he has ever met.

Give him a moment. It's a tough one.

(Yes, you are absolutely correct! It turns out Aziraphale was doing it just so HE could continue flirting with the prettiest man HE has ever met! And also because while talking to Nina, he found out that other people find it very hard to get permits and, being the bastard that he is, he wanted to see how far he could take this)

[xylophone888]

headcanon: rincewind has a pretty great sense of humor actually but literally no one can understand when hes joking and when hes serious (except for (usually) him) because he pronounces it all with the same exact cadence plus with the amount of stuff hes been through you can never tell if he's joking or serious about having gotten an autopsy a couple months ago

[form-defensor]

There’s been a lot of cat-ivity around here recently...

[thedankmemes]

[2649901]

[the-punforgiven]

Show up at work like hi boss sorry I'm late my I was helping my mother track down one specific 90s dungeon crawler for the purposes of obtaining a muffin recipe the developer hid in the files

[fish-enthusiast622]

[urhokarila]

Jesus christ, I wish to just one day be this pinnacle of wit, horniness, and sacrilege.

[badolmen]

WARNING 18+

19

[selkypostergirl]

Hot queer spaces tip: never trust any spot that has fewer than 2 fat and hairy people present!! You have no idea what other problems the space has if they can’t even meet the bear minimum

[swankyangles]

Speaking of design in general, not necessarily graphic design, my wife sent me the most unhinged multi-level pun of a cosplay I've ever seen.

It's Memphis Pyramid Head

[depressedlochnessmess]

im sure this has been done already but uh mimiku

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

[not-your-lawyer]

“French is such a beautiful, romantic language.”

“Cat, I farted.”

[thedankmemes]