#and then the managers and the 'cool' people get invited out for lunch. and then they say oh we'll bring you something back!

[reina-tries-2-write]

The Space Between Sounds

Chapter 4: Finding A Place

SYNOPSIS: After a silent week at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech, someone finally reaches out and invites you to participate with everyone. Are they just being pitying or are you really going to find your place?

WC: 2.8K

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You were sitting alone at lunch today, as usual, and you had noticed that Tired Guy was observing you. You had no idea why, he was probably just being judgmental or something but you couldn’t quite convince yourself that was the case. He looked almost sad for you so you assumed he was just pitying you.

But your assumptions were quickly proved wrong today.

A few bites into your meal, he came over and sat down across from you with a small smile in greeting. He pulled out a yellow notepad and pencil before writing something down and turning it around for you to see.

—Hey! You know you don’t have to sit alone. You’re always welcome to come join us if you want to. Just tell us how you need to communicate and we can do that. We did it with Toge so that’s not a problem at all. Want you to feel like you fit in and everything. And if it’s any consolation, I struggled to fit in at first but they’re all really good people/panda—

You looked at the message a little shocked. You were not used to people taking the time figure out how to communicate with you, let alone inviting you to participate with them. You picked up the pencil and wrote back, hand a little shaky in shock.

—Thank you. I really appreciate that. Kinda used to not fitting in anywhere tbh. Thing is, I can speak, I just don’t sound normal and hate talking—

—We don’t care if you think you sound weird. Toge only talks in onigiri ingredients so you definitely won’t be alone in the unique communication situation—

—I’ll manage. But thank you for including me. I kinda don’t know anyone’s name still since I struggle with new words—

—I’m Yuta. Panda is pretty self explanatory. I told you about Toge and then that’s Maki. She’s a bit intimidating but nice once you get to know her—

—It’s nice to officially meet you. Sorry it took so long. I’ll come sit with you guys—

He nods and smiles at you before leading you over to the table everyone else was sitting at. He gestures for you to take a seat and you end up between him and Blond Guy— Toge, that’s his name.

Picking up on the fact that you knew nothing about anyone, Yuta says something to the group that you don’t quite catch before he hands the notepad to Panda.

He takes a second and writes something down before handing you the notepad back. In his, interesting, handwriting is a proper introduction and an explanation of his cursed technique. Rather the fact he’s a cursed corpse.

After you read, Toge gestures for you to hand him the notepad and does the same. Cursed speech is his technique and it makes sense as to why he covers his mouth. You hadn’t noticed before since you sat alone during meals but he has cursed speech marks, a snake and fangs seal as he explained, on his cheeks and tongue along with having actual fangs which you found pretty cool.

Maki goes next and explains she can’t use cursed energy which you find interesting. Could you potentially give her some and teach her to use it? You had tried with Mari but it didn’t work so you weren’t too hopeful and didn’t bring it up.

Yuta went last and explained his curse, Rika, and his newfound technique— copy. He rambled a bit on the paper and you figured you might be able to help him control cursed energy if he wanted your help that is. He seems pretty damn competent with it already.

He requests you introduce yourself as well since Gojo had apparently not done a good introduction for you and they also had no idea what your cursed technique was. You figured this would be a good time to explain that, while you were touched by the gesture of using the notepad, you could get by without it. So needless to say, you wrote for quite a bit.

—Hey, I’m Y/N. Obvs I’m deaf but I actually can hear cursed energy. Sounds like how electricity feels if that makes sense. My technique is called Energy Flux and along with hearing cursed energy, I can manipulate it. Give it, take it, move it around, stuff like that. But there’s some stuff that’s important about me you should know. I can usually hear you guys coming up behind me because of your energy and stuff but it’s really loud around here and I’m still getting used to it so you’re welcome to tap my shoulder to get my attention if you need. You all sound different so I’m figuring it out. We don’t have to use the notepad the whole time since I can read lips but new terms and names are hard for me at first. So that’s why I had no idea who you guys were until now. But let me know if you have any questions about me and being deaf and stuff. I don’t get offended about it so you’re welcome to ask anything.—

Everyone reads your message and nods, letting you know they understand and will ask when they need. Toge notes the two of you will probably need to keep writing or typing since you don’t know his onigiri language and that he prefers it anyway since his language doesn’t exactly convey much.

***************************************************

Today at lunch, Y/N was sitting alone again, as she had done all week, and I watched Yuta’s mind race. I knew what he was thinking so I nudged him and nodded my head toward Y/N.

He gave me an appreciative smile before digging through his bag for a notepad and pencil. I heard him take a deep breath before going over and sitting down across from Y/N.

Obviously I wasn’t privy to their written conversation but a few minutes later, to my delight, Y/N followed him over to our table. I scooted over on the bench so she could sit between Yuta and I. She was clearly comfortable with him so I hoped she’d be okay with me too.

Yuta explained that she didn’t even catch our names during introductions last week and that we should do a proper introduction. We all took turns writing on the notepad and passing it around.

Y/N’s turn to introduce herself came around and I was actually a bit excited to get to know her. Figure out how she talked in a sense— what she was like.

She handed me the notepad after writing down a good bit of information and I scanned the page. The first thing I noticed was her handwriting. I really liked it and it was a nice personification of how she would sound if she spoke. It gave her tone and emotion that normally wasn’t present with written words.

She explained her technique which I thought was really cool. She could hear cursed energy? That was, well, unheard of. Not only could she hear it but she could manipulate it too. I wondered what exactly she could do with that.

She said we were welcome to ask any questions and after a few basics about how to communicate with her that Panda and Yuta asked, I scribbled down a question.

—What do I sound like?—

She smiles and takes the notepad back, writing down her answer.

—Like a humming noise. It’s not low like a bass speaker but more like a machine. Soft and not annoying. Kinda nice actually. You’re not as loud as Yuta but you’re louder than Panda. He sounds like a cat purring. Yuta sounds like a storm. Crackly, buzzy, the most like electricity. Maki is a quiet buzz but when she gets angry she sounds like electricity too.—

I chuckled at her response and was honestly happy that I didn’t sound annoying to her. I liked that she seemingly liked how I sounded the most. Based on her description, everyone else sounded kinda annoying except maybe Panda. I loved that he sounded like a purring cat— I was definitely going to give him shit for that.

I loved finally getting a little glimpse into who Y/N was and I really liked her personality and seeming resilience. She was doing her best to make the most of her situation and while clearly frustrating, she was still upbeat and kind to us.

****************************************************

You have a good time with everyone at lunch and after going back to the dorms to change into your training outfit, meet up with them in the arena. They’re all talking together when you arrive and you walk up to join, your notes app pulled up on your phone so you can communicate with Toge.

They all greet you and Maki indicates to you that she has a question for you.

“So, theoretically, can you give someone or a weapon cursed energy?” She asks, placing a hand on her hip.

You nod and smile, not expecting someone to be that interested in your technique.

“Show me.” She requests simply, brows raised.

You give her a thumbs up and everyone takes a few steps back, not knowing what to expect. To take or give cursed energy, you have to make contact with the target entity. You can still repel, amplify and manipulate the energy otherwise without physical contact. It’s just that the transfer process is much faster and safe for you this way.

That being said, you simply extend you hand out to her and she gives you an odd expression. You glance from her, to your open palm and back to indicate to her to hold your hand.

She furrows her brows a bit as if she was skeptical of the experience but places her palm face down on top of yours.

You already know she can’t use cursed energy, you can hear her or rather, she’s almost silent, so you channel a very small amount into her hand. To you, cursed energy feels and sounds like electricity, buzzing and slightly tingly and you don’t want to freak her out.

She flinches a bit at the new feeling, her eyes widening as she feels it move through her per your direction. You donate a small amount of your energy to her and once completely transferred, you drop your hand out from underneath hers.

She looks down at her hand, turning her palm up and making fist a couple times before she gives you a genuinely grateful smile. You then point to her polearm lying in the grass next to her and raise your brows. She picks it up and hands it to you, and upon touching it, you feel the energy flowing through it. It is already extremely powerful on it’s own, clearly compensating for her lack of cursed energy so you don’t tamper with it and quickly hand it back.

Training goes by faster than you could have thought and on your way back to the dorms, you reflect on your interactions earlier.

Sure everyone was nice to you which was surprising but welcome but were they just doing it out of obligation? Were they just being nice out of pity? It didn’t quite seem like it, Toge and Yuta being the most genuine with you. Maki was a little more closed off and Panda was hard to understand but was clearly trying to cheer you up and lighten the mood.

Maybe they weren’t being fake.

****************************************************

Y/N seemingly had a good time at lunch and didn’t struggle as much during training today so I figured it would be a good time to invite her to hang out with us again. Dinner would probably be a good, casual, no pressure opportunity for her to join.

I wanted her to continue to feel included and not like lunch was a one time thing. Plus I liked hanging out with her so I pulled out my phone and typed up a message to her.

Toge walks up next to you, snapping you out of your thoughts, and hands you his phone with a message typed up in his notes app.

—Wanna have dinner with us at 7?—

You smile and nod as you hand him his phone back and he accepts, smiling back.

****************************************************

You showered, changed, and hung out in your room until seven rolled around. You walked down the hallway to the kitchen to discover everyone already there, Toge and Yuta cooking something that smelled really good while Panda and Maki sat at the table, chatting.

They all greeted you in some form, smiles and waves once more, and Panda gestured for you to join him and Maki at the table. You sat across from the pair and Panda said something that was clearly directed at you. But you still couldn’t read his lips yet, or snout rather, so you furrowed your brows and pointed to your mouth as you shook your head.

“You can’t read his words?” Maki asks, picking up on your confusion.

You nod, happy someone understood. You pulled out your phone and typed to the pair.

—I’ll pick it up eventually so don’t worry. I’ve just never exactly talked to a panda before—

You watch the pair chuckle at your message and Panda nodded to acknowledge you. He said something again and you picked up on an ‘okay’ assuming he was telling you it was okay and that he’d be patient.

Maki looked up over your shoulder as you heard someone come up behind you. You turned to see Toge sit down next to you, setting a plate of yakitori in front of you. You flashed him a grateful smile that he reciprocated and, after Yuta served Panda, Maki and himself, the five of you dug in.

The food was absolutely delicious and you tapped the table between you and Toge to get his attention. He looks over at you and you point to the plate before giving him a thumbs up. He gives you a thumbs up back and elbows Yuta who is on the other side of him, pointing to you, his plate and giving him a thumbs up.

Yuta peers around him. “Glad you like it.”

Everyone diligently includes you in the conversation and as delighted as you were to be accepted, you knew you were only slowing it down. Toge noticed your change in demeanor and typed to you.

—What’s wrong?—

—I appreciate being included but I know I’m just hindering the conversation—

He vigorously shakes his head no before typing back.

—You’re definitely not. Promise. We want you to participate so we can get to know you and learn your gestures and stuff—

You smile, a bit sadly, but accept and continue answering questions and typing to everyone until you finished eating. After you cleaned up dinner the five of you migrated into the living room to continue your conversation.

****************************************************

In the middle of dinner, Y/N’s expression and body language suddenly changed. She looked sad and upset with something I couldn’t quite tell. No one else seemed to notice so I did what I would have wanted and typed up a quick message to ask if she was okay. For all I knew she could just be lost in thought but I got the feeling something else was wrong.

I tried to hide my sad expression after she answered my question.

She felt like she was being a burden. And I knew exactly how that felt. The two of us have unique communication needs and while I knew everyone here didn’t mind adapting, I understood why she felt that way.

I made sure she knew she wasn’t hindering the conversation in the slightest. She was actually contributing quite a lot to it and everyone was having a particularly good time tonight. Maki was more involved, Panda was a bit crazier and Yuta was more relaxed. She was helping for sure.

****************************************************

In the living room, Toge sat next to you on the smaller couch and you were more comfortable with his presence than you thought you would be. He seemed to understand you in a different way. Quietly. Intently.

Whatever it was about his presence was comforting in a way and you found yourself relaxing into the couch and social situation more fluidly and easily than you had ever done before.

Usually you were pretty guarded when it came to sharing details about yourself aside from surface level explanations about your deafness and the like. But the group had really put in an effort to include you and you could tell they were being genuine. Not pitying.

As you all settled into the living room, the conversation drifted to topics like favorite movies and embarrassing childhood stories. You found yourself laughing more than you had in weeks, and when it came time to share something about yourself, you hesitated for a second before revealing a small detail about your life before Jujutsu Tech. The group listened intently, their reactions kind and encouraging, and for the first time, you felt a glimmer of belonging.

You slowly opened up to them some, still a bit guarded because of past experiences but you could tell they all meant well so you revealed a few little pieces of yourself. Maybe you had found another little band of misfits.

[amidalas]

soooooooooooo fucking tired of working here where im just the forgettable front desk lady secretary who is the only one capable of taking accountability and responsibility

[hanjsquokka]

you have me.

seo changbin × gn!reader — fluff, hurt/comfort, established relationship

warnings — mild swearing, kinda angsty?, kissing

word count — 0.8k +

author's note — this is very self-indulgent, based on what happened to me this past week :( kinda feel better after i wrote this, but i would feel even more better if i got a binnie hug 😔. [not proofread]

“Maybe I'm just not meant to have friends,” you muttered, breaking the quiet of your bedroom as you laid on the cool mattress. Your hair ticked your nose as it moved slightly from the breeze from the air conditioner, making you feel even worse. You almost thought Changbin had fallen asleep beside you, tired from his long day at work, until you felt the mattress dip right next to your shoulder from his elbow as he leaned over you.

“Why do you think that?” He asked, turning you to face him.

You didn't want to elaborate.

The week had been hard for you, he knew that.

Last weekend, you'd come home early from a night out with friends, surprising him and Felix, who'd come over to hang out with him since you wouldn't be there. You managed a half-hearted reply with an equally unenthusiastic smile and burrowed into the warmth of your bed as soon as you stepped into the bedroom. Your boyfriend had joined you a few minutes later after sending his band member on his way home, probably telling him that he'd take him out for lunch the next day before he padded to the bedroom and sat beside your curled up form.

You didn't tell him what was wrong that day either.

“Baby,” Changbin brought you back to the present with a feathery touch of his fingers across your cheek, brushing away the strands of hair you'd been frustrated at. “You can talk to me, y'know? Our relationship doesn't just mean me ranting about how Jisung annoyed me all day at practice.”

You laughed softly at that, meeting his eyes which were almost crescents since he was laughing too.

“There's that smile,” he said, making your heart flutter in your chest, pushing away those painful thoughts, even if it was just for a moment. “Now tell me what's wrong? You've been upset this whole week.”

“They brought Sohee to our hangout last weekend,” you told him after a long pause, your eyebrows furrowed as you spoke. The image of the girl you hated, for completely valid reasons, laughing along with your friends—it hurt you.

A lot.

“They did what?” Changbin sat up straight and pulled you up as well. You knew it was a rhetorical question, he knew everyone in your friend group and precisely why you hated your ex-friend.

“She was there at the restaurant when I showed up, talking about her stupid boyfriend. That guy is even more of a red flag than her,” you grumbled.

“Did they tell you they were inviting her?”

“No! They didn't. They specifically told me after I asked them, No we're not inviting her, and then proceeded to invite her!” You swallowed, your throat feeling tight. “It hurt.”

“Of course you're hurt,” he pulled you into his lap, your head made to rest on his strong shoulder as he stroked your hair. “That's just… mean.”

Your breath hitched. “I don't get… why they keep hanging out with her. She's so… awful, and they know it!” You inhaled sharply.

“So that's why you came home early… I was so surprised seeing you walk through the door when I just came back from dropping you off.” Changbin rested his chin on top of your head after planting a kiss on your crown.

“Yeah, I had a bit of a meltdown and I took a cab home. It took a lot to make myself go there,” You said, feeling a bit embarrassed recounting the argument you had in the middle of a busy restaurant. You didn't prefer eating out too much because you disliked social settings with a lot of people, like restaurants, but you were excited to meet your friends at a place you'd been dying to try out.

So much for that.

“You'll find better friends,” he said after a while. “Ones that don't continously disrespect your wishes. What is the word… ah right, girls’ girls?”

You giggled. “Yeah, that's the word.”

He smiled. “When you're up for it, I'll take you to that restaurant myself. And we'll get whatever you like, okay?”

Your eyes lit up. “Yeah, I'd love that.” He squeezed you in his arms, making you laugh. “You're crushing me.”

“Too bad I'm so strong, hm?” He replied cheekily and kissed your cheek. You laughed even more, not even trying to pretend you were annoyed like you did when he gave you his signature bone-crushing hugs whenever you felt down. “You don't need those fake ass friends when you have me, okay? And you'll find better ones. I know you will. Those idiots are the ones missing out on all your wonderful charm.” Your cheeks reddened from his unexpected compliment. “Ah, my cue to kiss you.” You laughed even more until he shut you up with a sweet kiss on your lips, effectively taking your mind off of your ex-friends.

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©hanjsquokka | copying, translating or republishing my work is strictly prohibited

[ladycaramelswirl]

It Happened in Texas

Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader❤︎

Chapter 2 : five year olds are better than you (at making friends)

series masterlist

A/N: Yet again I’ve written an unrealistic scenario for the plot. And I’ll do it again. This is just crack plot and some fluff. The team having a good time. Use of y/n a few times.

Fun fact for context: most handcuffs used by law enforcement have universal keys

word count: 2.8k

Enjoy! 🤍

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

You make it through the next few months without any issues. You go on a case, report to Strauss and decline any of the team’s non-work-related invites. The team is polite, but you (deservedly) feel like an outsider. And Hotch still ignores you most of the time. You’ve both managed to somehow do your job and pretend the other person doesn’t exist. The team pretends not to notice. Your days start to seem cyclical, but at least unlike Houston, no one refuses to work with you. 

“Hi!”

You startle from your paperwork to see a child smiling at you. He’s sweet looking, with blonde hair and big brown eyes. How did a child get in here?

“I like your hair. Are you daddy’s new work friend? Are you also a superhero?”

It’s an odd lineup of questions. You try your best to answer them.

“Thank you. I like your hair too. I’m not a superhero, I think. Your dad is a superhero?”

The child nods seriously.

“He’s not a real superhero like Spider-Man, but he’s a superhero to me”, he tells you. 

Your heart melts. His father must be a really great dad.

“That’s so cool! Are you here to visit him?”, you ask.

The child nods. “But he’s busy right now”.

You don’t remember anyone on the team mentioning family visiting today. 

“What’s your name? 

“Jack”.

“Hi Jack, I’m y/n”.

Who was this kid?

“Uncle Spence!”

You watch the young profiler hug the child. 

Jack tries to hustle him for candy, but Spencer apologises and says he doesn’t have any. You offer him a chocolate from your drawer which immediately makes you Jack’s favourite. He decides to take residence on your lap. 

You look at Spencer. 

“Uncle?”

He looks flustered. 

“Oh that’s just what he calls us. He’s Hotch’s kid”.

What? This little angel?

“Jack? Jack where are you?”

You look up to see Hotch come out of his office looking distressed. 

“I’m here!”, the boy shouts.

Hotch makes his way over.

“Sorry buddy the meeting ran late I - ”

He notices where Jack is sitting and looks at you apologetically. 

“His school suddenly closed today and I couldn’t get a babysitter. Sorry if he bothered you”.

Oh? So he’s not ignoring you if it’s in front of his kid. Noted.

“No that’s okay. Sorry for giving him chocolate. He said he was hungry”.

Hotch picks him up from your lap. 

“It’s not a problem”, he tells you. “Sorry for making you wait Jack. Let’s go have lunch”, he tells the child. 

Jack looks at his dad. 

“Can she come to my birthday party?”

Hotch looks between you and his son hesitantly. 

“Buddy it’s in three days. She might be busy”.

Jack looks devastated.

“Please?”, he asks you.

“That’s okay. I can come”, you tell him.

“See dad!”, Jack tells Hotch.

“I’ll text you the address. And thank you”, the older Hotchner tells you.

“No problem”.

————————————

You make sure to enter the party late and wait until you see Hotch talking with a parent to sneak in. The BAU are all in one corner, drinking and laughing together. You steer clear of them and leave your present on the gift table. When you’ve run out of moms to talk to, you start clearing up garbage and washing dishes. A little blonde head pops up beside you.

“Hi!”

“Jack! Happy Birthday!”

He opens his arms for a hug and you bend down to oblige.

“Why are you tidying up?”, he asks.

“Well I didn’t really have much to do and I wanted to help out”, you tell him.

Jack frowns.

“So you don’t have any friends?”, he asks, deeply concerned. 

“No, I have friends. I-“, you think to yourself. You had uprooted your life to move to D.C. for this job. The only people who you knew in the city were your coworkers. Who you avoid because technically, you’re spying on them. Jesus Christ, the kid is right. You have no friends.

Jack sees you come to the realisation in real time and pats your arm like you’re a dog.

“That’s okay. Sometimes people have very little friends. Like my dad. Uncle Dave always says, that’s why you have no friends Aaron”, Jack tells you, imitating the older man.

You choke on air.

“Auntie Pen says dad would have more friends if he smiled more. Do you smile?”, Jacks asks you seriously.

You nod. 

He seems satisfied. “Then you can prob’ly have friends”, he tells you. “But if not, it’s okay because you can be my friend”.

You smile. How did such a grumpy man raise this kid? 

“I’d love to be your friend Jack”, you tell him. “You’re my favourite Hotchner. But don’t tell your dad”. You didn’t need him thinking that you were trying to get closer to the team by befriending Jack.

“Don’t tell me what?”

You turn to see your scowling unit chief.

You feel your stomach drop, but his face causes Jack to giggle. 

“It’s a secret!”, he tells his dad, jumping into his arms. Hotch picks him up and gives him a soft kiss on his head. He whispers something in Jack’s ear which makes his eyes light up and he scrambles to the backyard. Hotch looks at you for an explanation.

You shrug you shoulders. “A secret’s a secret.”

Hotch stares at you like he can somehow read your mind if he looks at you long enough.

“You’re very loyal”, he says. 

His tone is accusatory, and you’re certain he’s talking no longer talking about Jack.

I don’t want to be, you want to say. But you need your job.

“I care about my friends. That makes me loyal”, you say.

He scoffs. “She’s not your friend”.

You try not to roll your eyes. Obviously you don’t think Strauss is your friend.

“And are you?”, you ask. “My friend”.

Hotch stares at you like you’ve sprouted a second head, but he doesn’t have time to answer because Jack tackles you into a hug. 

“Thank you thank you thank you!” 

You’re thrown off balance by the force of the child and almost fall over. Hotch grabs your arm to keep you steady then quickly lets go. Jack holds up the Lego set that you bought him. 

“Dad this is the one I said I wanted! The limited edition one!”, he says excitedly.

Hotch smiles at his son. “That’s so great buddy”.

Jack runs off to show everyone else. Hotch looks at you gratefully.

“I’ve been looking for that everywhere. I can’t believe you found it. You got it in two days?”.

After overhearing him asking JJ about it in the office and had scouring the internet for one, you had used your day off yesterday to go to some sketchy seller in New York because they refused to ship it to you for some reason. You had technically bought it to get on Hotch’s good side, but the hassle was worth it to see Jack’s face light up. 

“I care about my friends”, you shrug.

Hotch stares at you again. 

“Well I’m sure Jack appreciates it. Thank you.”

You nod and he looks like he might say something else, but he just grabs a bag of chips and moves to head back to the party. You move back towards the sink.

“You don’t have to do that”, he tells you. “The dishes, or tidying up - you’re a guest. Thank you for everything you’ve already cleaned. But you should enjoy the party”, he tells you before leaving the kitchen. 

You don’t want to go back outside yet so you clean what’s left in the sink and then walk back outside. Jack immediately spots you and makes his way over. 

“Thank you for the present”, he tells you. 

“You already said that”, you laugh. 

“Yeah, but my dad said I have to say it again properly”, he tells you seriously.

Oh. Had they talked about you just now?

“Well you’re welcome. I hope you like it”.

“I like it”, he grins. And then he’s grabbing your hand and dragging you over to the BAU. 

Shit.

“Auntie Emily! Auntie Pen! Y/N is super awesome but she has no friends! You should be friends!”

Nononononono. 

The whole team stares at you and you feel yourself turn bright red. Thank God for foundation. You need to fix this, now.

“Jack, that’s um very nice of you, but-“

“What do you mean Jack?”, Emily asks. “She’s our friend already. We even sleep in the same room on trips. I don’t do that with non-friends”, she adds. She’s talking to him, but she looks at you. 

Thank God for Emily Prentiss. You shoot her a grateful look.

Jack looks at you sadly. “Does this mean we can’t be friends now? Because you already have grown up friends?”

“No way! Of course we’re still friends”, you tell him. Jack beams. He’s so cute, you think. You wish Hotch smiled this much.

“Ok! Then I’m going to play Star Wars now”, he tells you, running off. You’re immediately reminded that you’re standing beside your coworkers who are all grinning at you.

“I am so sorry-“, you start.

“She refuses to come out for drinks, doesn’t talk to us outside of work, but she tells a 5 year old that she needs help making friends”, Derek teases.

“I don’t need help making friends! I-“

“Name one time you willingly came for drinks with us”, Emily says.

You both know it’s none.

“I-“

“Leave the kid alone. She’s probably scared of all of you hounding her with all your questions”, Rossi chides. 

“This is so great!”, Penelope tells you. “I mean you’ve been avoiding us so we thought you didn’t want to be friends, or Strauss was telling you things about us, but if you’re just freaked out, we can be totally be normal!”

Spencer coughs. “That last part may prove difficult”.

Penelope smiles at you and lightly smacks him.

“So? You want to have drinks after this?”

You should say no. But Penelope was right. If you kept saying no, it sent the wrong message. You did like them.

“Ok”.

The group raises a glass to you and you smile. 

Maybe this won’t be so bad.

—————————

This was bad. When they said ‘have drinks’, you thought they meant at a bar, talking over drinks like colleagues. Turns out they meant drinking games and shots. At Hotch’s house. Post birthday party, which meant everyone was already a couple of drinks in when you started. 

“Truth or dare!”, JJ shouts.

“Dare!”, Penelope yells.

“I dare you to… wear one of Hotch’s ties and pretend to be him for the next round!”

Derek grins. “Good luck baby girl. Don’t let the boss man kill you.”

Penelope makes a point of furrowing her brows. “Don’t call me baby girl. That is inappropriate for the workplace”, she huffs in a deep voice. The whole table erupts in laughter. Then Emily turns to you. 

“Truth or dare!”

You’re not sure you can handle any questions at your level of inebriation.

“Dare”.

Emily looks like you’ve handed her a briefcase full of cash. Oh no.

“I dare you… to kiss the person this bottle lands on!”

God, if you’re there, help me, you think.

Hotch huffs. “Prentiss, she’s your junior, and we are not teenagers. That’s just harassment. Change the dare.”

Thank all that is holy.

Emily pouts. 

“Fine. I dare you to … handcuff yourself to the person the bottle lands on for the rest of the night. Except for when you go to the bathroom”.

What?

“Prentiss-“

“No! If she’s not comfortable, she’s capable for speaking for herself”, Emily says. “Right?”

You nod. You’re pretty much already sitting together with everyone - it won’t make much of a difference anyway.

“It’s fine.”

Emily beams and spins the bottle. I mean it might not be so bad. Being cuffed to Penelope or Spencer could be kind of funny.

“Hotch!”

You had to be cursed.

“Prentiss, this is -“

She ignores him and cuffs his wrist, and the other one to yours. 

“Okay! Now everyone give me your keys so they don’t secretly uncuff. I’ll keep them, so let me know when you need to use the bathroom”.

Hotch glares at her, but everyone hands her their key. Then they move on to bother the next person.

JJ moves over so that Hotch can sit next to you. You hadn’t realised how little space there was on the couch until it’s his thigh touching yours instead of hers.

“I’m sorry about this. Usually they’re less… chaotic”, Hotch tries to explain.

“That’s okay”, you tell him. 

It’s nice. The team reminds you of James, your best friend from your previous job at the Houston field office.

“Can Jack sleep with everyone shouting like this?”, you ask.

Hotch nods. “He’ll pretty much sleep anywhere if I tuck him in first.”

That’s sweet.

“He’s a great kid.”

“Thank you.”

You manage through the next few hours. It turns out that Hotch is a great conversationalist when forced to not ignore you. You’re actually enjoying the way the team somehow ropes him in to things because he’s not great at saying no to them. But it starts to get late. 

“Prentiss? Can you uncuff us please?”

Emily sways and giggles drunkenly. “You’re so nice and polite. Why can’t everyone else say please when they’re asking for things? Derek is rude”, she pouts. “And don’t call me Prentiss. It makes me feel old. Call me Emily.”

“Ok. Emily, please can you give me a key?”, you try again.

“What key?”

“To the handcuffs?”

“I don’t have a keys, I gave mine to Penelope”

What?

“Prentiss, this is not a joke. We all gave you ours. Just give us one”, Hotch scowls.

She leans in to whisper, but in her drunkenness it’s quite loud. “I don’t have any keys. But he’s so mad”. She looks at you excitedly. “Do you have a key?”

“No Emily. I gave you mine”, you tell her patiently. Hotch finds Penelope.

“Garcia! Prentiss says you have the keys to the handcuffs”. 

Penelope stares.

“No I don’t?”

“Emily?”

She looks devastated.

“That’s too bad. He looks mad. Hehe. Bad, mad”.

You and Hotch looks at each other in exasperation. 

“Do you have any spares?”, you ask. 

He shakes his head. 

“My spare is in my car, but I left it at the office yesterday”.

Neither of you can exactly drive to the office handcuffed. And everyone else is highly intoxicated. 

“So we have to just wait until they’re sober?”, you ask.

Hotch runs is free hand over his face.

“Unfortunately”.

You watch everyone else settle down in the spare bedrooms or go home. Then it’s just you and Hotch in the living room.

“I’m sorry, I’d offer to sleep on the couch, but…”, you both look at a happily sleeping Emily. “I’ve only got my bedroom left”.

“Oh.”

“Or we could not sleep? Just drink coffee and wait for… however long it takes them to get up?”, he offers. 

That’s not going to work at all. You don’t function well after staying up all night. Or after too much coffee.

“No, it’s fine. We should sleep and I’m sure you’re tired after the party today”, you tell him. 

“Okay”.

You both reluctantly make your way up the stairs. He offers you a toothbrush and you both brush your teeth in silence. You can’t exactly change handcuffed, so you get into bed with your regular clothes. Hotch turns off the light and you both lie there in the dark. 

“Good night”, you say quietly.

“Good night”, he says back. 

Somehow you both fall asleep.

————————————

You wake up to the smell of cologne and a soft fabric pressed to your face. It’s warm, and you snuggle into it to get closer. Then you feel something poke your shoulder. You blink open your eyes to see big brown eyes on a tiny face. 

“Are you and daddy friends now?”

What?

You look up and see that the warm thing you’re cuddling is actually your boss. You immediately yank yourself back, but forget the handcuff. It yanks him on top of you and the jerking movement makes him wake up.

“What?”, he mumbles sleepily.

Then he realises what’s going on and tries to scramble away.

“Oh, I am so sorry-“

“No, I forgot we were handcuffed and I pulled too hard-“

“That’s my fault-“

“Dad can I have pancakes?”, Jack asks.

You both turn to look at him.

“Of course buddy. I’ll be right down. Can you give daddy 5 minutes?”

“Okay”.

Jack saunters out of the room.

Hotch groans. “I am going to kill Prentiss”.

You giggle, but the sentiment is pretty much the same. 

“Let’s go find her”.

It turns out Emily had hidden the handcuffs under a plant “to be safe” and she apologises profusely as she uncuffs you both. 

“Next time I say no to a dare, it means no”, Hotch tells her.

“Okay”, she tells him. And then looks at you and grabs your hands in supplication. “I am so so sorry. Please forgive me. And don’t let this stop you from going out with us next time, because I promise it’s usually not as bad”.

Hotch glowers at her from beside you. But he seems pleased that at least you’ve been apologised to.

“I have to make breakfast for my son, so go home, or help set the table”, he tells her. 

She rolls her eyes at you.

“Yes sir”.

Hotch stomps away.

Emily and you lock eyes and start giggling. 

Maybe having friends in the BAU won’t be so bad.

Chapter 3

[wxnheart]

𝙼𝚞𝚏𝚏𝚒𝚗 𝚆𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐨𝐤!𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐂𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

inspired by this wonderful post by @pettyprocrastination. thanks!

Line Cook!Simon who's lost count of how many smoke breaks he's taken today because people are irritating and running a kitchen can be hard. If it isn't the disrespectful little newcomer fuck he has to tell off for the thousandth time, it's the fact that today's the day that one regular comes in and complains, yet again, about everything. If nothing's ever to his taste, why the fuck does he keep coming back?!

Line Cook!Simon who counts to 100 this time because he really hates losing his cool and fuckers, especially the younger ones, always try him. Is it the tattoo or the bloodshot eyes that scream murder? Do people really want these problems?!

Line Cook!Simon who ups the count to damn near 1000 this time because his dreaded customer has shown up. Again. And yeah, the crew's gonna be mad. Again. And yeah, he can expect the food to be sent back at least once. Again. Fucking hell, why does he even bother?

Link Cook!Simon who takes notice of you trudging along behind the yammering bastard. Oh. Oh. You're a pretty miserable thing, aren't ya? Emphasis on pretty. Never seen you around here before, but looking at you is much better than the Downer Dan who's talking your ear off. His lips can't help but quirk around his cigarette every time you roll your eyes whenever Downer Dan turns away from you. Oh well; he got his good view for the day. Back to work and running his nerves to the ground.

And poor you, accompanying your boss to lunch as a reward for your hard work or something like that. Your boss who's such an inconsiderate asshole that he didn't even give you time to respond to his invitation and so, here you are. He was busy talking your ear off about... something. Meanwhile, you were busy noticing the really scary guy out of your peripheral because it was better than listening to whatever your boss was talking about. You managed to get a good look when he turned away and put his smoke out and yeah, let's add rugged to the list—what was that, boss?

Your boss continues to talk your ear off when you two have been seated. His assholery knows no bounds. He's such a shit to the wait staff, delegating and talking at them than to them, and it's abysmal. If this were anyone else, you would've left but because it's your boss you have to sit and endure with a strained smile on your face. Fuck.

Your asshole boss critiques the food (even though it's been made to his liking and it's fucking good, what's his problem?) and pitches such a fit that the poor waiter, frustration simmering beneath their skin, takes the plate and practically stomps to the back. Your asshole boss who—OH SHIT!

It doesn't even feel like a second before you hear a crash and see the scary, rugged guy from before standing at your table (holy shit, is he a damn giant?!) and he's staring bloody murder at your asshole boss, the same boss who can't read the room and shut the fuck up. You would diffuse the situation but you're too busy staring at the scary, rugged, now cute guy to really come to your boss' defense.

Your boss is practically screaming and causing a scene, talking shit about how his food is never up to par and how he could buy their entire lives and the poor scary, rugged, cute guy is dead silent the entire time. Oh shit. All it takes to burst your boss' bubble is a: "Get the fuck out." Emphasis on fuck and oh, his voice—wait, what was that, boss?!

Your boss, indignant at such "treatment", retorts that this matter "wasn't over yet". Whatever the hell that meant. This time you intervene and use your best people-pleasing voice to calm him down. Somewhat. It's enough to convince the bastard to go and so he leaves but not without glaring at the scary, rugged, cute guy. The same guy who's too busy looking at you. Oh, dear.

You're embarrassed, doubly so, and you'll probably never hear the end of this from your asshole boss (because he holds a grudge like no other). You apologize profusely, a bundle of nerves, and give the justifiably disgruntled waiter all the money on your person. While it doesn't make up for the deplorable treatment and you're out about a couple day's worth of lunch, it's the least you could do. Besides, the little bit of food you did eat was good.

You take one more look at the scary, rugged, cute guy who... is still looking. You offer a smile (it was probably more like a grimace because anxiety) before leaving to catch up with your asshole boss. You may or may not have turned to catch one more glance. And almost walk into the door as a result. Oh, god. But if there's one thing for certain, asshole boss be damned, you'll be back to actually enjoy the food.

And unbeknownst to you, Line Cook!Simon, his temper abated somewhat by your actions, can't wait to see the view again. But fuck that guy you came in with.

[berryblosom]

DUMPLING ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ Osamu Miya X fem!reader

S: rumours cause you to have doubts about your relationship with Osamu, he proves you wrong.

You were completely aware of what people thought of you. Growing up with the Miya twins definitely came with its fair share of attention, unwanted of course but when your best friends are as popular as they are it’s hard to stay hidden. Even till this day, 10 years later you’re still the subject of pointless gossip and rumours.

You spend a lot of time with Osamu at his shop, it was like your little haven to escape to after a gruelling day of work. Of all the rumours that went around about you the one that came up the most was that you and Osamu were dating. It’s true you were a lot closer to the younger Miya twin and compared to Atsumu who is often away, you saw Osamu almost every day but that didn’t mean you liked him.

Liar

Fine you were madly in love with the man. It was easier back in high school when you barely talked because you knew Atsumu first but without the loud mouth blonde as your buffer you were at risk of spilling your secret and ruining your friendship with him.

“You look deep in thought, what’s up dumpling?” You could just melt into a puddle right there and then. Osamu adopted the nickname name dumpling for you back in high school, it was used as a tease at first because your mom once only packed you dumplings for lunch for a whole week but now your heart lurches every time you hear it.

“It’s nothing, just work stuff.” You awkwardly lie and laugh hoping he’s doesn’t push it. Osamu notices though, you’re not asking him a million questions about how his day was and you barely touched the meal he placed infront of you five minutes ago.

“That moron from work still bother ya?” You shake your head no. The moron in question was your manager who seemed to have it out for you. When you invited your coworkers over to have lunch at Onigiri Miya, he didn’t quite make the best impression on Osamu.

“No he wasn’t in today thank goodness.”

“Then what’s got ya in such a huff?” He ruffles your hair and you swatt his hand away.

“I’m not in a huff, just….do you think I’m clingy?” You’ve gone and said it now, you peer up at Osamu hoping he didn’t find the question strange but he just looked confused.

“Of course not, at least not in a bad way.” What did that mean? You were glad the shop was closed otherwise people would hear how pathetic you sound. “Whos got ya thinking like that?”

You hesitate but decide there no use in hiding it from him.

“The other day, that girl from our high school came in remember?” Osamu tips his head back trying to remember, he gets a lot of customers so it was hard to remember them all but he does recall how excited you were to see some old classmates.

“Vaguely.”

“Well I bumped into her again and she said that I was clinging to you a lot and that she wanted to talk to you but I wouldn’t let her.” You bury your face in your hands, you didn’t have the guts to look at him. You didn’t want to tell him but if you were stopping him from talking to girl no matter how much it hurt you wanted to know.

“Why would she say that? I didn’t want to talk to her.”

“It’s okay if you did! I know I’m here a lot and she seemed really into you.” Osamu frowns at how you were pushing away and not looking at him.

“What about you?” You finally look up from your palms to see him pouting down at you.

“What about me?” You face flushes slightly as Osamu bends over the counter to come closer.

“Are you into me?” Your eyes widen and it took all the core strength you had not to fall backwards from you chair. Osamu didn’t break eye contact, he was a cool as he always was while you were spluttering and trying not to burst into flames

“W-why would you ask that?”

“Because i want to know.” He states verily. Osamu had his own speculations about your feelings for him, he hoped it was the same as the ones he had for you but he wanted to hear it coming from your mouth.

“If I said yes, what would you do.” You fleeting confidence was the only think keeping you from fainting in his moment.

“Don’t play with me dumpling.” The silence in the room was deafening. Your palms were sweaty and Osamu being so composed made you sweat even more.

“You didn’t answer my question.” He narrowed his eyes at your cryptic attempt to challenge him. The space between your faces was almost nonexistent, you eyes flickered every few seconds between Osamu eyes and his lips hoping your want to kiss him wasnt too obvious.

“I would kiss you and ask you out on a date.”

“Real-“ before you could finish Osamus lips were on yours. His cold hands come up to cradle your face and his thumbs caress your cheeks softly. You grab the back of his neck and pull him closer to you. Never in your dreams did you imagine your first kiss with Osamu would be like this let alone in his Onigiri shop.

Osamu breaks for a second, breathing heavily. “I’m sorry, you just looked so pretty.” His pecks your lips and travels all around your face. “I wanted to do this for so long.”

How long?” You we’re on the verge of tears, happy ones of course but knowing that Osamu may have had the same feelings as you this whole time was upsetting. You could’ve been together since the beginning but you were too afraid.

“Since we met.” He looks down when your eyes widen in shock. “I was just scared you didn’t feel the same or that you’d never talk to me if I told ya.” You were both such idiots.

“Oh samu, I feel the same.”

“You do?” He grins

“Of course I do, I was just afraid of the same thing.” He picks you up onto the counter and swings your legs over to the other side so he could stand between them. You lean in for another kiss, this one much deeper and passionate than the last. His hands slip to your waist, sneakily snaking his fingers under your shirt.

You break once again but keep you forehead rested on his. “Soooo if I wanted to skip the date and ask to be your boyfriend ya wouldn’t run for the hills?” You laugh making Osamu smile.

“I wouldn’t, but I still want the date.” You tease and hug him close, resting your head on his chest.

“Anything for you pretty lady.”

[roosterbox]

Heyyyyyyy Steddie thinky thought time again! And I’m putting it under a cut because, YET AGAIN, my hand slipped and I accidentally almost 2,000 words.

Tags: ANGST, miscommunication, HOH!Steve, Mean-and-Overly-Defensive!Eddie

So picture this, if you will…

High school AU. Probably no Upside-Down. Steve is deaf/HOH. He signs, but he knows that not everyone else does, and so few take the time to learn, especially not for him, so he usually carries around a notepad too. Just in case. Someone (probably Dustin, lbr) asks him to sit in on a Hellfire meeting. Heck, maybe even asks him to join. Steve is unsure, but he’s open to new experiences and Dustin always makes his favorite club sound really awesome (also the guy who runs the club is super cool and hot too, but shhhhhh). So sure - he’ll check it out.

The day comes and Steve gets there early. Like really early. In fact, he’s there before anyone else. Which is fine; he can use the extra free time to do a little homework, right? Thing is though, he’s so focused on his notebook that he doesn’t notice somebody else come in - Eddie. And there are four important things to note about Eddie.

He doesn’t know Steve is deaf.

He doesn’t know that Steve has been explicitly invited here by Dustin.

He knows Steve only by his reputation. So, not good.

He’s as protective of his club and the kids in it as a mama bear.

Needless to say, these four factors combine into a perfect storm, and Eddie is immediately on the offensive.

“Hey!” He says. “Hey, Harrington!” He continues when he gets no acknowledgement. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

No answer. Steve doesn’t even look at him. Just keeps writing in his notebook.

“Hey asshole! I’m talking to you!” Eddie’s volume is rising, as is his temper. Despite his uncle’s best efforts, Eddie’s never been the best at keeping cool. But, man, the disrespect. It tends to eat at him. And coming from King Steve of all people? Oooooooh doesn’t that just make his blood boil. Eddie stalks over to where Steve is sitting. If he thinks he’s gonna waltz in there and tease or humiliate any of Eddie’s little sheepies, he’s got another thing coming.

Steve, meanwhile, is just happily doing his homework. Maybe doodling a little in the margins. Wondering if Eddie looks as cool running the club as he does around school. Especially when he’s up on the lunch tables ranting about conformity. He’s so lost in thought that a sudden hand on his arm shocks him out of his chair, up to his feet. And just like that, he’s face to face with his secret crush, the one and only Eddie Munson. He smiles, but only for a moment as he sees Eddie’s furious expression. The other boy’s lips are moving. A little fast, but Steve does his best to read them.

“-hell are you doing here, Harrington? This isn’t one of your stupid jock sports teams. If you’re here to hurt these kids-“

Steve’s eyes widen. He tries to sign something. No, no.

Eddie sees Steve looking scared, waving his hands. It only serves to make him angrier. Steve sees he’s getting nowhere with sign, so he grabs his notepad and starts writing. He can still see Eddie saying something in his periphery, and he tries to write fast. To clear up any misunderstanding.

But then. Eddie goes too far. He manages to hit on one of Steve’s biggest insecurities mid-rant. And then he keeps digging at it. Steve stops writing and just… stares. Like a dog, Eddie cannot let go of the bone he’s found, so he keeps going. Insert any list of your favorite Steve insecurities here. His upbringing. His (bad) relationship with his parents. His reputation (which Steve hates so much). His intelligence. His fighting skills or lack thereof (poor Steve: getting beat up in every universe). And the worst part is how mean Eddie is about it. The kids tease Steve too, and yeah sometimes it hurts, but it’s never felt as outright cruel as it does when Eddie says it.

Steve’s eyes fill with tears, despite his best efforts, and while Eddie is mid sentence, Steve decides he’s had enough. He shoves his notepad at Eddie, into his chest, eliciting a surprised huffed exhale, before grabbing his bag and just running. He runs out the door, out of the building, to his car, and drives himself home. He doesn’t stop crying for hours.

Eddie, after the surprise of Steve shoving him and running out, just rolls his eyes. “Typical,” he mutters under his breath. “Fucking prick.”

He looks down at the notepad in his hands, still mad but also curious as to what Steve had thought was so important that he just had to start scribbling it down while Eddie yelled at him. And…

Not here to hurt, I swear. Dustin invited me. He’s like my little brother. I’m deaf - sorry couldn’t hear you talking. I’ve seen you around, and I think you’re pretty cool. I’ve never played DND before, but Dustin really loves it. Maybe I could-

That’s as far as it went. And man. Imagine the feeling of your heart sinking, dropping down past your stomach, through the ground itself before finally coming to a stop in the molten core of the earth. Imagine that, and you may experience a fraction of the almost instantaneous levels of guilt Eddie feels at that moment. All at once he thinks of how Steve had looked at him after he first got his attention. He had smiled. Fucking grinned. He was happy to see him. Happy to be there. Eager to see what Hellfire was all about. Eager to learn.

And Eddie had just taken that happiness, that earnest interest, and stomped on it. Crushed it utterly beneath his sneakers as if it were a cigarette butt.

The other guys start filing in. Including Dustin. But before he can say anything (maybe to ask where Steve is, and why the hell does Eddie have his notepad), Eddie shoves past them out the door.

“Eddie, what-“ Jeff starts.

“I’ll be right back,” Eddie calls over his shoulder as he quickly makes his way outside. Just in time to see Steve’s car speeding out of the parking lot. He curses, loud enough that a few students still milling about jump at the unexpected noise. Eddie doesn’t care. He messed up. He really fucking messed up, didn’t he?

He makes it up to Steve eventually. It takes time, of course; Steve’s trust is a hard thing to earn even on a good day, but after that first encounter? They’re not just starting at zero; they’re practically starting at -1000. He starts small. Little exchanges here and there. Usually with Dustin (or, occasionally, Steve’s best friend Robin, who looks at Eddie like she would flay him alive if Steve gave her the word) acting as a sort of buffer. It takes almost half a dozen of these group encounters before Steve says (writes) a single word to him, and even then it’s perfunctory. Cold. Simple. And it definitely hurts, just a little, especially since Eddie’s crush that he’s had on Steve since freshman year has been steadily growing with every exchange they have. As monosyllabic (if even syllabic at all) as they tend to be on Steve’s part. But every time he feels that hurt, Eddie thinks of how Steve had looked at him when he left the club that day. How sad and angry and frustrated. And he pushes his own (tiny, inconsequential by comparison) hurt aside. I can do more, he thinks.

One day, he manages to corner Steve on his own, without Dustin or Robin. Steve is annoyed - he still gets that sinking feeling of hurt whenever he’s with Eddie (which is enhanced (terribly so) by the stupid crush he has), and immediately pulls out his notepad. Starts writing on it. Something simple and to the point. Leave Me Alone. Or maybe Go Away. He gets as far as the first word before he realizes that Eddie isn’t talking. Not aloud, anyway. No, he’s signing. A bit clumsily, and a few of the words are wrong but close enough to understand. One sign is chief among them, though.

I’m sorry.

And in that moment, maybe, it hits home for Steve that Eddie really means it. Means it enough to try and learn an entirely new language to meet Steve where he is. He looks in Eddie’s eyes and he can see the guilt and shame swimming there. The hurt is still in him, that’s not going away with one apology (though this isn’t the first one Eddie has given him, of course), but still. Steve scratches out what he had been writing in favor of something else. After a second, he hands Eddie the paper.

I can’t forgive you. Not yet. You really hurt me. But thank you. When did you start learning to sign?

He sees Eddie’s eyes get a little watery as he reads, but then he’s handed back the notepad. He had thought that Eddie might take the easier route and just write it down, but no. Instead, with his hands free, Eddie continues signing.

A couple days ago. Stayed up all night. His cheeks were darkening. Blushing in shame at his rudimentary skills. Bad at it. Sorry.

And maybe it’s just because Eddie is one of only a handful of people Steve has met that have taken it upon themselves to learn sign, or maybe it’s that damn crush he can’t seem to lose, but Steve shakes his head. No, he signs, trying to keep it simple. Good.

Eddie looks away, signing Bad again. Steve touches his hand, the first point of actual physical contact they’ve had since that day at the Hellfire Club. Their eyes meet, and Steve signs, with as much emphasis as he can, GOOD. And then, Thank You.

Eddie looks down, suddenly feeling oddly shy. He’s still blushing but he also can’t help but smile. There’s the ghost of a dimple on his cheek, making Steve’s heart give a weak little flutter.

You’re welcome, Eddie signs.

After a long moment, Steve writes something down. He doesn’t want to overwhelm Eddie with signs yet. Not to mention that he doesn’t know how deep his (apparently only days-old) knowledge base goes. Best to go easy on him.

Maybe we could… start over?

He holds it up for Eddie to read, face a picture of inquisitive hope. The other boy nods, starts trying to sign, but gets frustrated rather quickly before holding out his hand for the notepad. Steve chuckles and hands it over, not missing the way Eddie’s blush deepens even further at the sound he probably made. Maybe his crush isn’t as one-sided as he’d been thinking.

Yes! Absolutely! If we are, then consider this your “first” official invitation to the Hellfire Club. Today, after school. (There’s a “I” here but it’s scribbled out) We would love to have you there.

I’ll be there, Steve writes. And, after Eddie reads it, he makes sure to get the other boy’s attention before he slowly signs the same thing. I’ll be there.

[queenofthearchipelago]

Hey! I just saw your post about some meta doing good but then misunderstanding the characters at some point. If you do not mind sharing, what are certain misconceptions that you usually see and don’t agree with?

Hi! I don't mind sharing but before I answer this I wanna say that I do love that this fandom has so many interpretations of Aziraphale and Crowley's actions and thoughts and motivations. I think some of those interpretations don't always line up with everything we see of them in the show and I feel that both of them have areas where they can be misunderstood. But if anyone reading this finds themselves disagreeing with me, that you do see some of what I'm about to say in their characters, I'm not trying to take your version of Crowley and Aziraphale away from you and like, ruin that fun by saying people are wrong, or something. Fandom becomes really stiff when the culture only has one idea of who the characters are.

That said, I'll start with Crowley because I've always found him most relatable, and so I think about his character more than Aziraphale's.

The first thing is Crowley's temper. I've read quite a few metas talking about how Crowley needs to better manage his anger because it shuts Aziraphale down and makes it harder for him to talk. I don't see this. I mean, yes, Crowley has a temper. Crowley has been shown to be angry. But I've not seen it shut Aziraphale down. When Aziraphale gets nervous around an angered Crowley, it's always because Crowley has said something blasphemous. Such as at the bandstand when Crowley is cursing the Great Plan. Aziraphale becomes scared FOR Crowley and Crowley is never angry AT Aziraphale. I can't think of a scene off the top of my head where anything Crowley does makes Aziraphale feel like he can't say something he clearly wants to say.

But also, I feel that this take of Crowley's character, that he struggles with his temper around Aziraphale, somehow erases how gentle he really is with Aziraphale. He's always so patient with him, even when it would make sense for him to be off the rails angry. And also also, the two main times we see Crowley lose his temper around Aziraphale (the bandstand and then the fight in episode 1 of this season) are both times of great desperation. The world was ENDING. He was SCARED (He's really good at hiding how scared he is). And then Gabriel shows up and Crowley doesn't know how but he feels this will disrupt every single good thing in his life. And so he explodes in the street, something we don't have reason to think Aziraphale saw. Crowley literally left to go cool down. I think he did his best.

I also see a lot of metas speak to Crowley's apparent lack of self-worth. I've spoken about this before, I think Crowley is very confident in who he is. I think he knows himself better than Aziraphale knows himself. Crowley has ALWAYS known who he is, his arc is not one of self-discovery. It's actually Crowley's dedication to being himself despite what Hell would have him be that causes him conflict and intrigues Aziraphale so much.

That also leads into this idea that Crowley can't see himself clearly and therefore can't accept Aziraphale's love. As if he can't comprehend why Aziraphale might love him. But, we literally watch as Crowley graciously accepts every advance that Aziraphale makes. Crowley is the one who "goes too fast" and he probably has a lot of joy every time Aziraphale makes another step forward. It's Aziraphale who said, "Let's go out for lunch" the first time. It's Aziraphale who invited a demon into the bookshop meant to be an embassy for Heaven. It's Aziraphale who said "our car", and then Crowley gave him the keys. Crowley even blatantly says, "We've spent our entire existence pretending that we're not." This implies that he KNOWS. He knows Aziraphale has been pretending too, for 6,000 years, and before that too. Crowley knows he's loved, the problem was that he wasn't allowed to be loved by an angel, and neither of them ever got to say it out loud.

And then there are other, smaller things I see in metas that I don't generally agree with (though I completely understand how people got there). Which is this idea that Crowley feels rejected by Aziraphale. I mean, yes, but also no. I don't think Crowley got in the car at the end and drove away thinking that Aziraphale loves Heaven more than him. I think he's more angry that every single time Aziraphale falls to Earth, Heaven tugs on this rope around his waist and pulls him back up. I think Crowley understands Aziraphale's dilemma a lot better than we think he does.

And also, more recently I've seen some speculation about how Crowley wanting to run away is somehow a character flaw? Like, I agree with the point that both of them were wrong. Fixing Heaven won't work, so Crowley was right. But also, running away isn't a long term solution for them because they both love Earth too much. But I don't exactly see this as a character flaw? In season 1 when he mentions running away, let me remind you that THE WORLD WAS ENDING. He was desperate and he was scared. And in season 2, it wasn't so much a plea to literally run away into the stars and escape as it was an immortal being saying, "Look, Gabriel and Beelzelbub did it. Wherever they are, they're together, and they're dedicated to being happy together. Can we do that? Can we do that forever? In this bookshop or in the stars (in a cottage in the south downs?) Because I love you and I don't wanna think about belonging to anyone else anymore. WE don't need to belong to anyone else anymore. What do you say?"

And as for Aziraphale, I've said before that I don't think he wants Crowley to be an angel so that he can love him more. Aziraphale loves him as he is. And I think there are more articulate posts out there outlining why. The ask for Crowley to be an angel again has nothing to do with Crowley himself except that Aziraphale thinks Crowley would be safer that way. Aziraphale can fix Heaven FOR Crowley. Crowley's fall was wrong and he can now right that wrong. This happened, tragically, because Aziraphale loves him exactly as he is. And as much as Crowley's heart is broken right now, I don't think he doesn't know that. He knows the love he's had from Aziraphale these millennia was real. He knows it.

This became an essay, maybe one day I'll figure out how to get my points across quickly lol. But yeah, these are just my thoughts about who I understand these characters to be in canon. And I know that even though it's been nearly a month since the season dropped, people are still working through all the details that led up to our favorite angel stepping into an elevator and the demon who loves him more than life driving away alone in silence. I'm honestly still working through it too, there's still so much to think about.

[scribbleswithsaro]

𝐮𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬. a collection of lines from the 2003 movie Uptown Girls.

❛ Some fairy tales are true. ❜

❛ I’ve alerted the management company about this. ❜

❛ You did this to me on purpose. ❜

❛ You’re my best friend in the whole entire universe, how could you possibly think a thing like this? ❜

❛ There you are, sweetie. ❜

❛ You know, you can get botox injections for that forehead wrinkle. ❜

❛ Hey, you want to pick up bacterial meningitis or polio, you be my guest. ❜

❛ Listen, I didn’t mean to – uhh... ❜

❛ You always do this. When are you gonna grow up? ❜

❛ This is like a world gone mad. Like I’ve stepped through the looking-glass or something. ❜

❛ I need my shirt back. ❜

❛ This place is beyond its normal grotesque. It’s post-nuclear. ❜

❛ I can’t believe you did this to me after all the strings I pulled. ❜

❛ I know that I’m an undeserving creep, but can we please talk about it over lunch?❜

❛ Fine, see if I care! I’ll live off of water and sunshine. ❜

❛ I actually am uniquely qualified for this position, having spent so many years developing my skills as a people person.

❛ What is this, The Shining? ❜

❛ How cool is this? Look at this little tea set! Look at these cute little scones! ❜

❛ Hey - hey. You don't touch that unless I happen to invite you to tea. ❜

❛ Ugh! You just got your germy drool all over my plastic scone, you freako! ❜

❛ You missed a spot. ❜

❛ Why don't you get your little plastic baggie out and dig up some penicillin? ❜

❛ When you work for me, you leave when I say you can leave. ❜

❛ For your information, I do not work for you. I am employed by your mother. ❜

❛ Swinging door. ❜

❛ Baby, what are you doing outside all by yourself? ❜

❛ I know this is a big change for you, but it'll feel like home in no time at all. ❜

❛I can't believe those creeps would throw a destitute woman out onto the street.❜

❛ Chivalry is so dead. ❜

❛ You can't keep all this stuff. ❜

❛ You sure looked great out there. ❜

❛ I just... you know. Yelling at you the other day and all..? I'm sorry. ❜

❛ What are you doing here? ❜

❛ You're on probation. ❜

❛ Act your age, not your shoe size. ❜

❛ Don't you ever do that to me again. ❜

❛ You're hurting me. ❜

❛ You hurt me. Take it back. ❜

❛ I really hate surprises. ❜

❛ My glands are swollen. I'm having an allergic reaction. My immune system is crashing. ❜

❛ You know you had fun. ❜

❛ It must be hard getting rid of all this neat stuff, huh? ❜

❛ Can I have just five more minutes, please? ❜

❛ God, you're pathetic. ❜

❛ That's kinda harsh. ❜

❛ It's a harsh world. ❜

❛ Could you please help me? This is starting to hurt. ❜

❛ There is never, ever an excuse for hitting another person. ❜

❛ We need to talk. ❜

❛ Those are the four most hateful words in the English language. ❜

❛ Why are you buttering my plastic scone? ❜

❛ I invited you to afternoon tea. The least you could do is be polite. ❜

❛ Are you still moping over that disgusting guy? ❜

❛ Other people always let you down. Why don't you forget them and do something for yourself? ❜

❛ Maybe some of us aren't good at anything. ❜

❛ Every grownup is good at something. ❜

❛ What's so great about being a grownup, anyway? ❜

❛ You're scared. ❜

❛ If you refuse to have a nice time with me, I'm going to have fun by myself. ❜

❛ What is with this music, anyway? ❜

❛ You know, I thought that maybe - just maybe, you'd remember we had plans tonight. ❜

❛ If I never have a drop of tea again, it would be too soon. ❜

❛ Please, go without me. ❜

❛ Is that what you think of our friendship? ❜

❛ Thank you for taking me in like this. ❜

❛ Well, look at this. Perfect 98.6. Only twenty degrees above the temperature of the beautiful day awaiting us outside. ❜

❛ I'm not going anywhere. Especially with you. ❜

❛ We're going to sit in giant tea cups and spin round and round in circles until we puke. ❜

❛ I can't believe I let you talk me into this. ❜

❛ Haven't you ever been to an amusement park? Ever? ❜

❛ Why is it so dead around here? ❜

❛ Let's go home. ❜

❛ You're lucky that you were mad. See, when you're mad, you don't miss people. And if you stay mad, it's like you never knew them at all. ❜

❛ I wasn't mad, [Name]. I was confused. ❜

❛ You were right, [Name]. I am scared. But you're scared, too. You're as scared as I am. ❜

❛ That water's contaminated, you know. ❜

❛ If you don't get out of there, I'll call the police. ❜

❛ A hundred and one degrees. Sick as a dog. ❜

❛ You better hope you don't get radiation poisoning from that toxic pond scum. ❜

❛ Take two echinacea and a Benadryl for your sinuses. Call me if you need anything else.❜

❛ You're the doctor. ❜

❛ I can't think of what to say. ❜

❛ When I'm not ready, you hunt me down. When I try and make it work, you're not interested. ❜

❛ All you do is take, and I've got nothing for you right now, so... maybe it's a good time to start thinking about someone other than yourself.. ❜

❛ This is everything that he's left behind in the whole world. ❜

❛ Grownups never stay friends with kids. ❜

[allwormdiet]

Insinuation 2.6

Onward and upward, right?

Good faith gestures aside, this is a good call with the mentality Taylor has. She doesn't want to put herself at risk any more than she has to with a couple of unknown villains, and her face would definitely be a risk.

Again, a really fucking cool description of Taylor's power and how it works for her. The sensory overload is a motherfucker but hey, she managed to crack that one eventually.

Enchanted by her eyes, ehh Taylor?

Little funny that Regent gets the most words in his description and most of it is about how Taylor doesn't really go for his type, sandwiched on both sides of the narration with what I assume are, in fact, her types.

Yeah, see, exactly. In order she looks at the Undersides like "hellooooo" "hey" "helloooooooo"

I know there are reads of Taylor as a lesbian but I'm gonna be real this immediately scans as bi, no I'm not automatically choosing that bc I'm also bi, leave me alone

Literally who bets against a Thinker, like c'mon now

Also interesting that Grue is described as sounding like an adult. Wonder if that just means that it's deep, or if he's trying to talk in a way that makes him sound older than he is

Fansites aside I'm somehow not shocked that Rachel would be against meeting new people

Also, interesting that she keeps thinking of the Undersiders as their cape names rather than the names provided, although it makes sense if she expects them to be somehow bogus

Oh hey the change in reference is actually diegetic, I totally missed that the first time through

Taylor you fuckin nerd ilu

I don't know why they decided to hide two thousand dollars in an Alexandria lunchbox, but I kind of love it. I'd offer all my friends thousands of dollars inside of lunch boxes if I had that kinda money, it'd be my thing

Here's the pitch, and it almost goes sailing right past Taylor bc after eighteen months of hell she doesn't believe that anyone would invite her to join their group.

I wonder how intentional this is. I don't know enough about what Lisa knows with her power to be like "she knows Taylor is desperately lonely and would probably bite down hard on any hook that came with a promise of camaraderie," but I'll admit the thought's occurred to me.

There we go, the man behind the curtain made explicit

And here we get a little bit more from everybody. Brian seems to really like putting his cards on the table with these conversations, which means he's not shy about explaining why they want Taylor on the team.

Taylor, meanwhile, still doesn't get why anyone would want her, as a person or as a cape. It has to be laid out for her.

Speaking of laying out why she's strong and terrifying,

Aww, she called Taylor honey

But also god fucking damn, good job on the overkill Taylor, you fucking rotted Lung's dick off with spider venom on your first night as a hero. This is why I'm so charmed by her, she's got this constant vacillation between "huge dork" and "idealistic hero" and "biting you biting you biting you biting you biting you" that feels like a nightmare to balance properly.

Brian trying so hard to both be the Mature One and also trying to get the other two to stop helping, poor kid

In the grand tableau of world events, I believe this is this is what's called "a historically significant occasion"

Current Thoughts

I can't wait for her to grow close to these people and then break all of their hearts for the sake of the greater good, all while I read along and also get my heart broken watching these kids hurt each other

I need to take a bit of a break, I've been reading kinda nonstop, but I might get some more in after dinner tonight. Really wanna see where this goes

[asmutwriter]

Just A Woman (Part 1 Section 2)

DESCRIPTION: You spend the day with the Bridgertons. Getting to know one of them just that little it better

A/N - I have condensed partr 1 (which you can find here) into 4 smaller chunks so that you can have a better reader experience

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

WORD COUNT: 1939

From beginning / Previous / Next / Master List

WARNINGS: swearing, time period sexism

DISCLAIMERS

- I wrote this in my knowledge of sex workers and I am truly sorry if I got it wrong and/or is offensive, that is not what I wanted to do and I’m sorry if that is the case

-  This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

Night comes and goes, and so does the morning. You all have lunch together, then early the Saturday afternoon you see Eloise reading. You read it over her shoulder. “May I help you?” she asks as you shake your head

“Just bored. I want to do something” just as Johns mother walks into the room, John holding her arm. She smiles at you

“You could sing for us some more my dear if you are bored”

“Oh I don’t think people want to hear my voice anymore” she laughs 

“Sing my dear. I do not care what the others think of your voice. I find it divine and want to hear more” you nod and look at the now several pairs of eyes on you. 

“As you wish” you go over to the piano and start playing. Typically, you go for a slow love song. They all clap afterwards. Eloise looks at you 

“Why do you always sing about love and romance?”

“It’s the easiest thing to think of on the spot”

“I wish you would change it up a bit”

“Oh. Is that a challenge?” she laughs

“I doubt you would be able to think of one” she scoffs “when I can find a woman who doesn’t want marriage” you bite your lip anxiously. You stand up and go in front of her, holding your hand out for her to take. “What?”

“You are joining me. You wanted something different did you not?” she nods “then take my hand and trust me” she laughs slightly, but intrigued she take your outstretched hand. You look at her as you lift your skirt slightly, so she can easily see your feet. You hear Violet go to say something but you notice John shake his head. She lifts her skirt up to, just above the ankles. “Foot forward. Heal to the floor” you show her, as she copies. “Hit twice, then go back and hit your toes to the floor twice” you show her as she copies. You show her the rest of the dance, she copies as best she can. “Now turn to me and dance down the length of the room, hands pressed to each other” she nods and does as you do. 

“I don’t believe you’ve actually done this to a song you’ve made up” you raise an eyebrow to her, going over to a little table you hit the top, creating a rhythmical thudding noise. Johns mother smiles and does the same on a table near her as you stand and do the dance. Once getting to the other end you start to sing, repeating the dance. Going back to her, you take her hand, doing the dance with her, nodding and smiling at her as she manages to keep up. After the dance you stop, bowing to each other and smiling

“I hope you enjoyed that. I and my friends have a full dance routine to that song. It looks cool when we all do it”

“Are they coming to the dance tomorrow?” Daphne speaks up. You shake your head

“Unfortunately no. It’d be unfair to only invite one of them but I think only one is old enough to go to a dance” she nods as Johns mother turns to the woman as they begin discussing tomorrow’s ball. You bite the nail of your thumb as you suddenly realise you will be likely required to dance in a more proper fashion and you only tend to do more… eccentric dancing so you need to brush up on your more posh dances.

So, when it gets late at night you go into the drawing room. It is the furthest away from the bedrooms so if you knock something over or fall over yourself you’ll be less likely to wake the family here. You practice the steps of your feet, counting out loud the numbers. “One two step one two step and spin. One two step one two step and spin” you repeat. “And spin, spin, spin, spi- holy fuck” you get made jump as you see Benedict standing in the doorway. You place your hand over your heart “you scared me half to death” he chuckles

“Apologies miss. I didn’t mean to” he pauses a moment “You’re pretty good at dancing too”

“Thank you. It’s not my best talent but it’s one of them”

“Where did you learn?” you run your hand through your hair 

“I umm, I taught myself actually. I would always picture myself at fancy balls or parties”

“Have you never been to a ball before?”

“No. Unfortunately not. Not ones that I can dance to. I snuck into a couple before, weddings mainly. Get free food and drinks that way. But I couldn’t dance at those ones as I didn’t want to bring attention to myself” he nods

“You’ve not danced with anyone then, have you?” you avert his eyes

“Is it really that obvious?” he laughs and walks over to you

“I can only tell because your hands are in the wrong places” he takes your hand, placing it on his shoulder, taking your other one in his as he places his hand on your waist “you need to have a more relaxed frame. Yours is up to high” you nod as he smiles at you “Now count again” you nod as he takes the lead, surprising yourself with the fact you don’t tread on his toes at all. Once you both find a rhythm your curiosity gets the better of you.

“Why are you up so late?”

“Couldn’t sleep. Came down for a drink and I heard you counting in here”

“So you aren’t just stalking me?” he laughs

“I’m going to spin you, ok?” you nod as he slowly spins you under his arm, pulling you back into the dance. “Where did you and John really meet?”

“What do you mean?”

“Considering how long he’s been talking about meeting this amazing woman you are not quite what any of us expected. Plus, he doesn’t seem to be fully attached to you. You seem to be like strangers to each other. Makes me think you don’t know each other very well”

“I thought your sister was meant to be the smart one of the group?” he laughs

“Is that meant as a compliment or an insult?” you smile at him as he spins you again

“A compliment. I’m not sure who I’m allowed to tell though so if I tell you then you have to keep it a secret”

“Promise”

“Pinkie promise” you keep the dance up but move the hand that’s holding his upwards, holding your pinkie finger near him. He nods and takes your finger with his

“I promise” you smile and go back to taking his hand and dancing.

“He came into my work one night and asked me to be his female friend for this weekend” he raises his eyebrows at you slightly

“You work?” you nod and avoid his eyes. 

“Got any more dances you think I need to know about before tomorrow?” you say as you change the subject

“None that I can think of. You’re good considering you’ve never danced with anyone before”

“Will I need to know the quick paced ones?”

“Possibly?”

“I might just sit those ones out if they are a part of the event” he nods

“Might be for the best” you move away from him, letting your arms fall to your sides as you look him in the eyes as your own dart to his lips for a second, and then look away. You feel his eyes scan over your body quickly before he stretches and looks away from you. 

“Considering how late it is, I’m really not tired” he nods in agreement

“No neither am I” you look at the clock in the room

“Fuck it’s nearly 2am” he laughs slightly. “What?” you look at him

“I’m not used to such words falling from the mouth of a woman who looks so well dressed” you laugh

“I think I’ve done pretty well to not have vulgar language in front of your family though. One of the few things John said to me was to not swear” he nods as he watches you go over to the bookshelf in the room. “I love the book selection this house has” Picking one out you flick through the pages. You let out an annoyed groan as you put it back

“All of them except that one I presume?” you nod as he comes to stand by you

“I dislike romances”

“Why?”

“They are an awful representation of a woman and how she thinks” he furrows his brows as he looks at you

“I would’ve thought they are quite accurate” you laugh and turn to look at him, seeing his soft eyes contrast the slight irritation of the rest of his face “doesn’t everyone want love?”

“Yes. But it isn’t always possible. Most of the time woman and men marry for convenience, not love. It gives girls a terrible idea of how their adult life could look like when the reality is far worse” you see his brow go to normal again as he watches the candlelight dance on your skin. “I always dreamed I’d marry a handsome prince. That a man would meet me one day and he would fall in love with me and we’d live happily ever after in a castle. I realised that men don’t want anyone who doesn’t have anything to offer” you lightly touch the spine of the book you had just held in your hand “men want an untouched woman who’s main purpose is to sit still, look pretty and have children. Not one with a lot to say and an intelligent mind”

“You have a very biased opinion of love”

“Have you ever been in love?” he shakes his head 

“No. I’ve liked people but never loved anyone. Have you ever been in love?” 

“No I don’t suppose I have. At least not in the ways that books describe it as. I loved my friend and I love her children but that is a platonic love” he nods

“What about your parents?” you laugh slightly

“I don’t have any parents. I did have someone who looked after me but she died about 4 years ago” you see him watching you out of the corner of your eye. “Sorry. Telling you my whole sob story which you probably don’t care about”

“No. Please go on. So long as you are ok talking about it” you nod slightly. He hesitates at first before he takes your hand as a way to comfort you 

“There’s not really much else to say. I now live with her children and look after them” you chuckle slightly as you turn to face him, meeting his eyes in the low light of the room. Your breath catches slightly as you take a few seconds to take in his features. You mentally shake yourself and look away, but subconsciously tighten your hand around his. He raises an eyebrow to you

“Are you ok?” you nod

“Yeah. Fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” he chuckles slightly

“You seem nervous is all?”

“Yeah. I’m nervous about the ball tomorrow” he smiles at you

“You will be fine” he brushes a hair behind your ear, watching your cheeks turn red. “It is late. We should be off to bed” you nod

“Goodnight Mr Bridgerton” you say as you walk calmly to your room. You get in and shut the door, placing your back against the cold wood you smile to yourself and get into bed. 

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

[the-moon-lullaby]

hi! <3 I hope you are having a nice day :D I was wondering if you could do some headcanons for episode 26 from High School Life? I always thought that episode was really cool and fun, so if you could make maybe some headcanons mainly about the picnic Candy has with the girls and Alexy could be pretty awesome :D like just general headcanons about it. Also bestie I FEEL you about wanting to write anything else than an essay for uni :")

Random headcanons about episode 26

N/A : I really liked this episode too ! I was kinda inspired (I think ?)so there'll be some headcanons about the date but also some about the picnic with Alexy & the girls (also yeah, it's refreshing to write about things I actually enjoy, it didn't happen in a while sadly, so thank you for your understanding dear <3)

So let's start with the dates with the HSL Boys :

About the date with Nathaniel, I found it funny how Candy thought it'd be a good idea to invite him on a picnic, in a park, in the middle of spring, when she knows that he's badly allergic to pollen (I just know that my boy had to make a stock of antihistamines and was suffering in silence, guess he really wanted that date)

I like to think that Nathaniel actually took the time to carefully prepare himself for the picnic. Because even if Candy didn't specified it or anything, Nath wanted to believe that it was indeed a date. So, he thought a lot about what he should wear (let's ignore the fact that he still wears the same outfit in the illustration) and he put on a nice cologne, hoping that Candy would like it

It's pretty clear that Nathaniel intended to declare himself (there's a moment where he really seems about to kiss Candy) so when they got interrupted by Thomas, he tried to hide it but he was pissed (really Iris, put a leash on your brother, some people are trying to get it here)

In the case of Armin, I liked how he freaked out at the wasps' attack and it kinda make sense since at the frequency he goes outside, he probably hadn't seen a wasp since 2007 lmao

Also this little picnic date surely did him some good because there's no way this boy doesn't have a vitamin D deficiency (Okay, I might be a little hard on Armin right now, I'll stop)

Armin brought the sandwiches and believe or not but it was pretty good. He's not a big cook but I don't think he's a bad one, he just sticks to simple things (also he mastered the art of making sandwiches because it's his favorite 2 AM snack to make when he's pulling an all-nighter)

I believe that it's during this picnic that Armin realised that he had a crush on Candy (Guys, he spent a WHOLE afternoon out in the wild just for Candy, that says a lot if you ask me)

Okay one thing about the date with Castiel : I wanted him to bring Demon to the picnic (maybe it could have been hard to manage with all the food around but come on, he's a good boy LET HIM OUT BEEMOOV)

I am also a dog person so I might be biased lol

But just picture it : Castiel and Candy enjoying their little lunch with them taking turn to feed Demon with little bites of food (adorable plus, Castiel would enjoy to see Candy playing with Demon)

Also, Castiel's change of tone when talking to his dog (if you have a pet, you know what I mean). Candy would melt (and me too)

After eating, Candy and Castiel could have take Demon for a little walk in the park and Castiel would have let Candy hold the leash as she seems really excited about it (and he would have been really happy about it. Once again, if you have a pet you know how great it feels when someone you like gets along with your pet. It's so cute to see !)

Since Demon has this bad habit to pull on the leash (as seen in episode 3 of HSL), Castiel would help out Candy by putting his hand above hers to get a hold on the leash (and also to hold her hand)

Firstly, I am convinced that Nina was hiding somewhere in the park when she saw Lysander and Candy together (Back to the time where Nina was in her Joe Goldberg era lmao)

I think Lysander was the calmest amongst the boys about the date (and luckily he was because Candy was stressed out enough for the both of them. As usual)

He might have asked Leigh advices about dates 'cause like, he's supposed to have some experience right ? (the truth is that when his brother asked him that, he was just like "well, I was just existing and then Rosa decided that I'll be her boyfriend. So just stand there and exist I guess ?" Yeah, great advice from the big bro)

When I tell you that Kentin was ecstatic when Candy invited him on a picnic, that's an euphemism (bro was internally screaming)

Really, he probably wasn't able to stand still until the D-Day (he waited for that since basically forever so understandable)

Also, just like with Castiel, I wanted him to bring Cookie (I really like dogs, sorry)

The illustration for Kentin's route is so cute

The both of them, laying in the green grass, so close to each other with the bright sun above them. (That's such a picturesque vision, I love it !)

I like to think that they reminisced together of the memories they had from before they arrived to Sweet Amoris. Kentin tends to feel insecure when talking about this period of his life. However, as they both talking he realises that there's no judgment in Candy's tone and that the moments they spent together actually means a lot to her. It would warms his heart and if it was even possible, he'd be even more fond of Candy

(I wish they talked more about it in the game because even if it gets better by the end of HSL, his route still feels a bit superficial. Like there's this idea that he had to completely transform himself and become handsome to become "interesting". I don't know if you know what I mean)

Now, about the picnic with Alexy & the girls :

Before starting, I kinda wanted to see more interactions between the characters during the picnic (but I guess that the episode would have too long then but it's okay, I'll put some here)

Kim & Capucine's conversation (might sound odd but I'll explain it)

Kim (just know that I love HSL Kim, she's such a good character) just has this protective and « I won’t take any shit » vibe (even though she’s actually a big softie as we see with her interactions with Violette and it's so cute) and everyone respects her like naturally ?

In the beginning of this episode, Capucine was insufferable. Really, this girl was trying really hard to be like Amber when she’s nothing like her (and if you take into account the fact that Amber herself is putting on a persona, you kinda get a girl trying to put one someone else’s persona thinking that it’s the way to go. Kinda sad).

(just putting it here but I liked having a character like HSL Amber in the game because she brings the drama you know ? she's also a bully but she also have some depth to her character ? I am really confused 'cause I've had some bad experiences with people like her during my school years so I am wondering : Is Amber character actually good or do I have a Stockholm's Syndrome-ish thing ???? pls help)

Let's go back to our sheep : Kim & Capucine's interaction 

So I like to think that during the picnic, Kim and Capucine got to talk a little and boom, two worlds meet : Kim doesn’t really give a shit about what people think of her and oppositely, Capucine lives by that. And I think because of it, Capucine kinda have a negative image of Kim. 

Until they get to talk. Kim is friendly towards her even if she acts like a bitch because I truly think that Kim is pretty good at reading and understanding people (she probably doesn’t even realise it herself but when you’re capable to bond with someone so reserved as Violette as well as getting along with Castiel AND Nathaniel at the same time, it says quite a lot about this ability she has)

I think this conversation they’d have on the park would make Capucine think that Kim is a pretty cool person even though they are quite different and what's the most striking difference is that Kim is truly authentic (it’s something that’s pretty rare these days so when you come across someone like that it can really makes you question a lot of things) and she might even realise that the persona she puts on everyday at school doesn’t suit her and that she’s actually not happy with it (which I believe, after her relationship with Samuel, is one of the realisations she had before trying to become a better and truer version of herself)

This one was a bit long but I think there's so many things to say about Kim's character lol

Now, Melody and Iris talking about the whole Nathaniel situation and Alexy coming from nowhere just to say something like "there's too many fishes in the sea to waste time on one that doesn't want be caught. Move on girlie"

Like 'ayoo, mind your own business boy ?' (that's Alexy, of course he's not going to do that. He just has this radar for drama)

It's either that or HE IS the drama

Anyway, Melody is a bit startled because "how do you know about that ???" when the really question is "how could anyone not know" with how she's so not subtle. And that's how Alexy would basically become a love coach for the afternoon (wtf)

However if Melody starts to talk about Candy being too close to Nath, oh boy, Alexy goes defensive mode and he won’t hear more of this nonsense (like girl it’s not Candy’s fault if Nathaniel likes her better, wake up) 

Anyway, this conversation would be pretty random and Melody wouldn't really know what to answer because I feel like she’s a pretty reserved person and on the contrary Alexy’s quite unhinged and then, there’s Iris in the middle watching the show (honestly same girl, I’d like to witness this conversation too)

Violette (my sweet girl) would try to draw the landscape but would end up practicing drawing silhouette using her friends as models. She’d be too shy to show it but I just know she’d end up showing her sketches to Kim later and she’d blush when told how good this is (pls their relationship is so lovely, I kinda ship them)

A Peggy and Rosalya’s interaction could also be interesting : they both like to know the gossips and all but the difference between them is that Rosalya would not spread rumours the way Peggy does. So I think Rosa would try to make her understand that she sometimes goes too far which is unfortunate because well, she’s cool to hang out with but if she keeps going like that, she might end up having everyone turning their back on her. 

The water fight is honestly quite fun to imagine

Despite what he says in the game, Alexy lost it (and quite significantly) 

I mean bro, you’re trying to put a fight against Kim, what did you expect ???

That's all I have for this so I hope you enjoyed reading this !

Wish you the best and see you soon !

[sundaynightlive]

august of ‘85 (Steddie, Part 1)

Steve’s hands are shaking, which is not entirely conducive to safe driving. His legs, too—he’s trembling all over. He’s had (and seen) enough panic attacks to know what’s happening. He feels like he’s going to throw up. He feels like he’s going to pass out.

He drives.

He struggles to maintain an acceptable speed, struggles not to plow through stop signs and over curbs to take corners a little sharper, get there a little quicker. He curses his parents for building a house so far from Hawkin’s tiny little doctor’s office, stupidly wishing he could’ve run there, because maybe that would’ve gotten rid of some of this nauseating adrenaline. He can’t tell if he’s building or crashing.

He coughs. It’s half a gag. Now is not the time to be gagging.

Steve tries desperately to take his mind off it, but all he can think about is Eddie. Eddie.

And August of ‘85.

But first, the end of July—

“I’m sorry, pumpkin,” his mom is saying over the phone.

It’s not like he’s all that upset—he had expected this. At least this time his parents had had the decency to warn him they wouldn’t be joining him at their beach house in Maine. The last three years, it had been a crapshoot, and if they did show, they stayed a week, max, and left Steve alone for the majority of August. This would’ve been fine, if Steve had brought anyone down there with him, but he always chickened out of inviting people, false hope overcoming harsh reality each time.

Being alone wasn’t so bad. He had all the time in the world to watch movies, visit the sights, walk along the beach, and read old books (that he suspected were meant to be decorative) he found around the home.

And he cleaned. He cleaned and managed the upkeep. He hired people to paint and he moved furniture around sometimes or bought something new if he decided his mother’s tastes had changed—he’d be damned if he was going to let them sell this place, not when all his happiest childhood memories resided here, and not when it was his only real escape from Hawkins, Indiana.

No, the house would be kept and it didn’t matter if his entire trust fund went towards it. He wasn't going to college, wasn’t moving somewhere expensive, wasn’t buying sports-cars or a thousand-dollar engagement ring for a long-time girlfriend.

He was keeping this damn house.

It’s all he had left of them.

“I’ll still go down,” he tells her, “But, yeah, that’s alright. I figured.”

“Aw, pumpkin, have fun, okay? I know you love it up there. Maybe take Nancy?” Steve flinches. Had he forgotten to tell them? Or had she just forgotten? He can’t remember.

“Right, okay. Love you, mom.”

“Love you, too, pumpkin. I’ll talk to you later.”

And by later, she means sometime within the next few months or so.

Steve hangs the phone on the receiver and sighs, stretching a little bit and mentally shuffling through possible outfits. It’s almost noon, and he has plans. Well… half-plans. He hadn’t exactly agreed to meet Dustin and Munson for lunch, but Dustin would be expecting him, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to disappoint the kid. He’s pretty apprehensive about being seen in public with the local drug-dealer and town-pariah, but Dustin has been insisting for a couple months now (all summer) that Eddie is ‘cool’ and Steve should ‘get to know him.’

How did you even fall in with this guy? He’s, like, greasy.

Freshman orientation—and he is not. Greasy. He’s really, really cool and funny and I want my two best-friends to also be friends.

Why are both your best-friends full-grown adults?

Why’s your best friend a 14 year old?

Touché. But I’m not wrong about Munson—he’s sketchy. He sells drugs.

This sounds like ‘King’ Steve talking.

King Steve wasn’t wrong about everything, Dustin.

Yes. Yes he was.

And the argument had gone on, but Dustin is impossible to outsmart or convince, so Steve had ultimately been roped into this whole ‘coffee date’ situation.

Not date. It’s not a date. It’s coffee. He’s not sure why he put it like that.

In fact, this is so casual and so pointless and so stupid that Steve is going to wear his least-expensive pair of jeans, and a t-shirt.

That’s how much he doesn’t care.

He puts some version of that on, and then immediately decides against it. He’s not used to looking so casual, and he will be in public, and despite the fallout with his friends, and his quest to be okay with being unpopular, he’s not exactly willing to also be unattractive. Not that clothes are always what makes people attractive, but it is what makes him attractive.

The nice jeans that sculpt his ass, the polos tight against his chest and working wonders for his arms—yeah, that’s Steve.

Nice jeans, blue and green polo shirt—he checks himself over in the mirror a couple times. He feels good, normal, right.

So he leaves.

On the drive over, he finds himself nervous, and understandably so. He gets along with most people easily, but Eddie Munson isn’t most people. Eddie’s like Robin, and Robin didn’t come to him easily at all. On the bright side, Steve had never been one of Eddie’s tormentors—that had been reserved for ‘popular’ upperclassmen. Eddie was technically a grade ahead of him and therefore higher on the high school food-chain despite his well-known loser-ness. Steve didn’t deal in making kids older than him miserable—just younger.

But Steve was still a well-known ass, and Eddie knew that, and if it was going to be anything like talking to Rob was, then Steve was in for a barrage of snide little side comments that he ultimately deserved, but made him uncomfortable, anyway.

Might as well prepare all his sincere responses—

I’m not like that anymore.

I’m sorry.

I know. I was stupid.

He parks. He sighs. He runs a hand through his hair. He steps out of the car.

He freezes.

Dustin and Munson are standing outside the coffee shop, chatting, and the sight sends something incredibly foreign into his guts, something he wants to clock as jealousy, but doesn’t feel like jealousy. It feels more like—

No. Nope. Nada. Not that.

Eddie Munson doesn’t look the way Steve remembers at all. He remembers choppy brown hair, wiry limbs, and clothes that never fit him—most of this is from ages ago, though, when Steve was a freshman. Eddie was in his home room that year, but after that, he rarely even saw him in passing.

This Eddie Munson, on the 20th of July, 1985, is not wiry, and wearing clothes that definitely fit him, with brown curls (like Nancy’s) clipped back to keep them off his neck in the heat. His outfit—this cropped band tee and jeans and boots—flatters him. It does more than flatter him, but Steve doesn’t think like that, so no it doesn’t.

It just flatters him.

Anyway—

Steve unfreezes. Dustin finally spots him and grins, waving him over. Eddie spots him, too, which is greatly unnerving, but whatever. Steve runs his hand through his hair again, trying to ground himself.

What is happening?

“Hey Steve, this is Eddie. Eddie, this is Steve.”

Steve extends a hand—sort of a peace offering—and is relieved when Eddie takes it.

“Dustin tells me you’re not a douche anymore,” Eddie says.

Oh, here we go.

“Trying not to be,” Steve answers, politely.

“Cool,” Eddie replies, dropping his hand, “How do you feel about Star Wars?”

What? Star Wars? Steve’s brow furrows of its own accord. He looks over at Dustin, who’s trying and failing to feign some sort of innocence.

“You told him I like Star Wars?”

“It’s the only thing you two have in common,” Dustin admits, and Eddie grins—blinding. His smile is blinding. That’s all Steve has to say about that.

“Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?” Eddie asks, and Steve’s brows raise this time, instead.

“Solo. Obviously.”

“See, that’s where you’re wrong—“

And it comes alarmingly easily to them. Talking with Dustin and Eddie is like spreadable butter on toast, and it has Steve in a daze of disbelief for about the entire time. The conversation doesn’t even cease when Dustin gets up to go to the bathroom—they’re arguing about the band on Eddie’s t-shirt, whether or not Steve would like metal if he tried it, if it’s “the future of music” or just a bunch of screaming. Eddie doesn’t get mad about it, just insistent.

Steve concedes, eventually, that he doesn’t actually know what he’s talking about, and that most of his opinions are just other people’s opinions.

“We’ll listen, sometime,” Eddie says, “I have tons of tapes—I’ll bet you a hundred bucks you like it.”

“Are you free tomorrow?”

And that’s how Steve and Eddie end up hanging out at Steve’s the next day, listening to all sorts of stuff—a lot of the harder stuff isn’t really Steve’s thing, but he has to admit, at the end of the day, he did like a vast majority of what Eddie played for him.

And he really enjoyed Eddie’s company. A little too much, maybe.

“Pay up, Harrington.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Steve relents, “I owe you.”

“Good thing, too,” Eddie jokes, “I do not have a hundred bucks handy.”

Steve laughs. He had suspected that, but it didn’t matter to him. He liked Eddie’s company. Spending the day with someone he actually liked would’ve been payment enough. Steve doesn’t usually get to do that unless he’s working—he and Rob hang out sometimes, but her mom’s so goddamn strict trying to convince her to let Robin hang out alone with a guy is near impossible.

Hopefully, when summer’s up she’ll let Steve drive Robin to school or something.

“Figured that,” Steve replies.

An offended gasp— “Are you calling me poor, Steve?”

There’s a beat of silence, Steve’s heart sinking a little. Had that been presumptive? Why had ge automatically assumed Eddie wasn’t good for it?

Shit.

Shit.

What? No, I—“

“Steve. I’m joking. I am poor. Obviously.”

Steve glares.

“Asshole.”

“You really have changed, huh?”

It feels really good to hear someone like Eddie say it.

The rest is ancient history. They’re friends, good friends, for the rest of July. And sure, that’s only eleven days, but nine out of eleven of them Steve sees, or at least talks to Eddie. He comes into family video, they chat over the phone, Steve even goes to one of Eddie’s goofy ass garage-concerts.

It’s not half bad. Eddie’s a fantastic guitar player. That part is impressive. More than impressive.

Maybe.

“You really won’t come?” Steve whines a few days before he’s set to leave for Maine, and Robin glares at him, obviously annoyed. He’s asked about twenty times in the last two days, and for the last twenty-times, it’s always the same answer—

My mom would never in a million years let me be alone with you for an entire month. And I have to work, idiot.

The idiot part seemed unnecessary, but it is kind of his fault for asking a billion times.

“We have talked about this, Steven.”

“That’s not even my name.”

“Didn’t ask, don’t care,” Robin says. “I’m not going.”

“But maybe you could meet a cute girl or something! I’m sure if we told your mom my parents will be there—“

“Steve! I. Am not. Going.”

“Going where?”

Steve jumps. He had been so busy begging he hadn’t noticed the door open, even with the bell on it, and somehow Eddie was already right next to him at the counter, leaning over on his elbows. Steve huffs.

“I’m going to Maine for the month,” Steve says, shooting a glare in Robin’s direction, “And someone refuses to go with me!”

“You’ll be fine by yourself,” Robin argued, exasperated, “You’re always by yourself!”

“But it’s boring.”

“I think you can handle boring,” Robin snaps, turning around, “If you need someone to go so bad, ask Eddie!”

Ask Eddie.

Right. How has he forgotten about Eddie?

Steve turns to him, and Eddie immediately straightens, hands up in mock surrender.

“I like ya, Stevie, but alone together for a whole month,” he chatters, nervously, backing away, “We’re basically strangers. We just met, what? A week ago?”

Steve pouts. He puts on his very best puppy dog face. He doesn’t wanna go alone—not this time. It’s fine and productive, sure, but knowing that his parents won’t be there and there’s not even a sliver of a chance of spending quality time with them? He doesn’t wanna be alone.

“Please?”

Eddie blinks. Then, he hangs his head dramatically, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Fine.”

“Ha!” Steve cries, pointing a finger at Robin, “You’ve been replaced!”

“Please,” she says, unphased, “You could never replace me.”

She’s, ultimately, correct.

And then, August—

“You wanna do a 16 hour drive in one go?” Steve asks incredulously. Eddie shrugs.

“I mean, why not, man? You take eight, I take eight, and bam, we’re there.”

“Dude, we have an entire month to be down there. Taking a couple days to travel—“

“I hate motels,” Eddie insists, “I sleep in a shithole, but at least I don’t pay to sleep in a shithole.”

Steve can’t help but grin a little at that, despite how it’s mostly sad.

“Your uncle pays to sleep in a shithole,” he points out.

“Are you calling my home a shithole?”

“Eddie—“

“Kidding… I’ve gotta tell you something before we commit to this.”

“What? You snore?”

“I’m gay.”

Steve frowns, and glances over. They’re sitting together on his couch, almost an entire cushion apart, which is weird, but Steve supposes it’s comforting for Eddie in this moment of vulnerability. He looks awfully pretty today, in his sweatpants and baggy band t-shirt.

Steve is totally confident in his sexuality. He can totally, casually think his friend is pretty.

“And that’s important… why?”

Eddie is clearly surprised by this response. He opens his mouth to explain himself, and then closes it, and then matches Steve’s frown.

“You don’t care?”

“No,” Steve says—he doesn’t. Of course he doesn’t. He might have in high school, but he has changed. Extensively. He thinks about telling Eddie Robin is also gay, but realizes before he does that’s probably rude and also a breach of privacy.

“Oh.”

There’s a brief awkward silence.

“So… what’s that like, anyway?” Eddie giggles a little and then bursts into full laughter. Steve should be offended because he’s being laughed at, but he can’t help but grin along with it, anyway.

“Hey—I’m just curious!”

“Curious!” Eddie repeats, giggling up another storm. Steve sighs, shaking his head.

“God forbid a guy try learn something—“

“No, no,” Eddie breathes, putting a hand on Steve’s knee. Something jolts through his spine like lightning.

Woah.

“It’s just such a stupid question.”

“Ouch?”

“You know how you like girls?”

“Yeah.”

“Well I like guys. That’s it. You’ve got the hots for the Leia Organa’s of the world, and I’ve got it for the Luke Skywalkers.” Steve raises an eyebrow.

“The Luke Skywalkers? The goody-two shoes golden boys?”

“You’ve got a problem with my type?”

“No,” Steve says quickly, hoping not to appear judgemental, “I just thought—you just seem like more of a “bad boy” kinda guy.”

“Maybe I am,” he teases, “Maybe I like to do a little corrupting, first.”

Steve swallows hard. Eddie’s tone takes him totally off-guard—all low and suggestive. And the smile he’s wearing is so cocky. Steve should be used to this, as Eddie is often a cocky, theatrical bastard, but when it’s directed straight at him talking about “corrupting good boys” it’s just… a lot.

He doesn’t stop to think about why that might be a lot—just accepts that it is.

“Just kidding,” Eddie says. Then, “I really do just like nice guys.”

Nice guys like me? Steve wants to ask.

“Noted,” he says instead. He’s not sure which one of those was worse. “So. I take it you’re not backing down on the 16 hour drive?”

“No, sir.”

“Do not call me sir.”

“Sorry, ma’am.”

“Jesus Christ, maybe this is a bad idea.”

“Too bad,” Eddie sing-songs, “You’re stuck with me.”

They actually do make the trip all in one go, much to Steve’s surprise. 8 hours and 8 hours isn’t totally awful when you’ve got someone to talk to (or occasionally glance at while they sleep, fighting the feeling you get when you realize just how pretty and peaceful they look).

Yeah, it’s not terrible.

“Holy. Shit,” Eddie says when they finally make it. It’s coming up on three in the morning, but Steve isn’t even remotely tired. He’s too excited to be back, happy to finally be out of the car and far, far away from the town they came from. “It’s on the beach?”

“Oh—did I not—“

“We’re going swimming. Right now.”

“We can’t right now.”

“Why the hell not?!”

“Sharks,” Steve says, putting the car in park in the driveway and popping open his door, “But there’s a pool.”

Eddie looks over at him, incredulous.

“Why would you have a pool right next to the entire fucking ocean?”

Steve grins— “For when you want to swim at 3 in the morning and not get eaten by sharks, duh.”

Eddie pops the handle and kicks open his door which is something he has been consistently doing for the last 16 hours, and Steve cringes every single time. He also doesn’t bother going for their bags—just bee-lines for the front door, Steve hot on his heels, fumbling around in his pockets for the keys.

“Holiday House?” Eddie asks as Steve steps past him. A fancy metal name-plate with those very words rests below the number on the door.

“My parents name all their properties,” Steve says as he fumbles around. This lock has always been a little fidgety, but he hasn’t had the heart to fix it. It’s too nostalgic to jiggle the handle the way his father used to while his mother told him all the fun things they had planned for the month of August.

That feels like forever ago.

“They have an apartment in New York called The Skyline and a flat in London called Elton.”

After Elton John, who Steve’s dad often called ‘the piano fairy.’ Steve’s pretty sure Eddie wouldn’t enjoy that bit of information, though.

“What’s the one in Hawkin’s called?”

Steve finally gets it. The door swings open into the hall and he steps over the threshold. The windows need to be opened and the shelves need dusted—it’s stuffy.

“The Kid,” he answers quickky, hoping to avoid any further conversation about that. He flicks on the lights in the hallway, and heads straight for the windows and blinds and curtains as Eddie shuts the door behind him and follows slowly, taking it all in—the foyer, the great room, the sun room, the dining room, the kitchen.

Unlike Steve’s house, the place has a more “lived in” feeling, with soft rugs thrown over the hardwood, fabric couches with throw pillows and blankets, and little trinkets lining the walls. There’s family photos, his mother’s art, awards won by his father, candles, memorabilia. It’s still grand, and boasting wealth—

But it’s still cozy, with white and blue tones and more windows than were probably necessary and a lofted upstairs that opens into the main area so it never feels like you’re truly away from everyone else.

Steve loves it here.

“This is insane,” Eddie says, plopping down on the couch. Steve feels himself being watched as he begins opening windows, running his hands along the sills to wipe away some of the dust before he breaks out an actual duster tomorrow.

Later today, actually.

“Welcome,” Steve says, “You’ve got a month to get used to it.”

“I’ll never get used to this,” Eddie says, breathless. Steve turns to look at him, all wide-eyed and awestruck by a house that, for Steve, is just house. A house full of good memories and comfort, but still just a house.

Eddie looks like he’s seeing the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel for the first time.

Steve kind of wishes it was his first time coming here. He wishes he knew what Eddie was feeling in some way.

He wishes he could forget what this used to be for him.

“You gonna swim?” Steve asks, turning back to the windows. Eventually, he reaches the curtain pulled over the sliding glass door, pulls it away, and reaches for the outdoor lights. “Hopefully these—“

The pool, patio, and steps to the beach spring to life in warm light. Steve’s happy to see none of the string lights have fallen or broken—those were a new addition last summer and he’s actually quite fond of them.

“Are you?”

Steve hums, considering it.

Why not?

“Yeah, sure. Just let me get these open, first.”

Eddie moves past him, and at first, Steve’s unbothered at the notion of Eddie swimming out there while he’s opening windows and turning on lights in here, but then pale skin catches his eye—

He’s captivated.

Eddie’s just… taken off his clothes, fully stripped down to his boxers, and Steve probably should’ve assumed that’s what he was going to do, but it didn’t even cross his mind until it had already happened. Eddie’s standing at the edge of the pool, tying his hair back behind his head.

Oh wow.

Steve’s done a very good job of pushing it down, but this is the last straw. It floods over him, just how hot Eddie is, and sets his heart into a full race—

You like him.

You think he’s cute.

You like boys.

You like girls and boys.

But you like boys.

You like Eddie, who you’ve invited to spend an entire month in a house with you alone.

You’re screwed.

Fucked.

Ruined.

Steve only feels the tears on his face after they’ve fallen. He takes a shaky breath and wipes them away, because how stupid to be crying over this? He knows better—he’s past the point of thinking it’s wrong or unnatural, Robin made damn sure of that.

But now he’s… now he’s stuck here with Eddie. And he likes him. And he can’t have him, because how would that even work? Logistically, they can’t date in Hawkins, they can’t get married—

God, who’s even thinking about getting married? They’re nineteen and twenty!

Steve. Steve’s thinking about getting married.

But who’s to say his feelings are requited? No one. And he shouldn’t just assume because Eddie’s gay that he automatically has a shot. He’s probably the exact opposite of—

I really do just like nice guys.

Is Steve a nice guy? Lately, yes. Before? No. And does Eddie think of him as Old Steve or New Steve? King Steve or Babysitter Steve? Who’s to say?

Why is he even getting worked up. Why doesn’t he just open these windows and go outside and get in the pool? Just be normal. He should just be normal. And he should ignore all this, because it’s too much to deal with right now, at the beginning of his vacation.

Their vacation.

The last thing he’s gonna do is ruin Eddie’s vacation by having a crush on him—god, a crush? This can’t be happening.

The universe fucking hates him

Steve finishes with the windows and heads outside. Eddie’s already in the pool, and he looks downright blissful, floating around running his hands over the water like he can’t believe it’s real.

When’s the last time he went swimming?

“Don’t pee in there, or anything,” Steve says, which is stupid but he’s flustered and he wants to say something but he doesn’t know what— “Because then I’ll have to drain it and no more night time swimming, unless you’re risking the sharks.”

Eddie scoffs, turning to face him, “Steve, why the fuck would I piss in your pool?”

Fair question. Steve’s cheeks burn.

“I don’t know!”

“Too late, anyway. I already did.”

Steve, in the middle of unbuttoning his jeans, freezes.

“Are you—“

“No, I’m not serious,” Eddie laughs, coming up to the edge and dropping his chin onto his arms, grinning up at him.

It’s beautiful. And blinding. But mostly beautiful.

“You really need to figure out jokes, Harrington.”

“Maybe you’re just bad at making them.”

“That,” Eddie says, “Is not possible.”

There’s something in his voice as Steve pulls his pants over his feet that nearly knocks him off balance. Something… breathy and… Steve’s not sure. Just something, something more than teasing. Steve wants to believe it’s because he’s seeing Steve almost naked for the first time, but he’s afraid to read that far into it.

If he does, he’ll never make it in the water.

“Is it cold?” he asks, carefully sitting himself down on the edge.

“No,” Eddie replies, so Steve sinks his feet into it, and Eddie’s right. It’s a nice temperature, probably from the sun. “Is it always full?”

“No—somebody filled it last week,” Steve answers, kicking his feet a little. The water’s nice, Eddie’s nice, the warm summer air is nice.

He’s feeling a little too nice, actually.

“Are you gonna come all the way in, your highness?”

It’s Steve’s turn to scoff, then— “Stop calling me that.”

“Make me.” Eddie pushes away from the wall, and good thing, too, because he’s too busy floating away to see Steve malfunction at the insinuation. Insinuation? Maybe Eddie wasn’t insinuating anything—he has a tendency to be a bit of a drama queen.

Maybe it’s nothing at all. It’s probably nothing at all.

Steve pushes himself off the edge and into the water.

“Fuck,” he groans. He hasn’t swam in awhile, either, he realizes, and the wet feels nice and relaxing around all his limbs. Eddie is spinning in languid circles, trailing his arms through the water. He looks ridiculous, but Steve’s only thinking—

Cute.

“We have to get groceries tomorrow,” Steve says, an effort to keep a conversation going. He can’t help himself. He wants to keep talking to Eddie—it’s been like this since he’s met him.

Eddie’s just so good to talk to.

“Hmm,” Eddie hums, “You gonna cook for me, big boy?”

Steve burns. Even hotter.

“Unless you wanna waste all your money on takeout,” Steve confirms.

“Tempting,” Eddie replies, which is like him. If Steve’s learned anything about Eddie in the past 12 days, it’s that he loves Chinese food, and he’s very good at convincing Steve to get him some.

Or maybe Steve is just very eager to please him.

“And we should probably check if we have toilet paper, sunscreen—and wash our sheetd, even though I—“

Steve is cut off abruptly by a wall water smacking him in the face, getting in his mouth and up his nose. He coughs, sputters, wiping himself off and mourning the loss of what had been a really good hair day.

“You’re so—“

Steve’s turn. He splashes Eddie back, and from there it’s an all out war. Steve hasn’t been in a splash fight in a swimming pool with anyone in probably a decade, and here he is, barely breathing, laughing uncontrollably, shouting unintelligible nothings until Eddie’s seizing both his wrists and lifting them above his head—

“You lose.”

“Yeah, right.” Steve wrenches easily from his grasp and tackles him in the water, initiating some form of wrestling until Eddie's pinned to the wall, arm twisted (as gently as the angle will allow) behind his back, both of them wheezing for air.

“Asshole!” Eddie gasps.

“You started it,” Steve snaps back.

“Ow—let me go—“ Steve does as he’s told. The last thing he wants to do is—

Oh.

When Eddie turns, they’re practically nose to nose. Steve’s breath blows out of his lungs like it doesn’t belong there, and he finds himself unable to keep his eyes on Eddie’s eyes—it’s too intense.

Fingers brush over the side of his face.

This can’t be happening.

“Is this okay?” Eddie whispers.

More than okay. Perfect. Kiss me. Fuck me. Have me. Marry me.

“I—uh—yeah, yes. Please—“

Eddie silences him finally with his mouth. Steve’s eyes flutter closed—the boy tastes like pool water, spit, and morning breath, but Steve could honestly care less. He melts into the kiss, pressing into Eddie as closely as he’s afforded.

Until Eddie pulls away from him.

“Two things,” the metal-head says, breathless, but firm, “One—I refuse to be the thing that ruins your life.”

Ruin his—what does that—?

“Two—wait a week. If you still want me for the rest of August, I’m yours.”

Eddie pulls out of his grasp.

Now, today, July 18th, 1986, Steve knows in this moment, he should have snatched Eddie back and told him all sorts of things—

You won’t ruin my life.

We could be good.

I’m not waiting for you, I want you now.

Let’s do this.

But then, in the small hours of August 2nd, 1985, Steve could barely breathe, let alone think, and as he watched Eddie push himself out of the pool, boxers clinging to his ass and thighs, hair tied up and dripping, smooth skin and more smooth skin and so much skin, all he could think was that September 1st was an eternity away.

And he would take what he could get.

End Part 1

(Next Part)

[vent-channel]

I hate being autistic I’m not gonna lie.

Today it was leavers. I only go into school for exams and I can’t handle assembly halls so I wasn’t there. My friends were though. And they sent plenty of pictures on the group chat of them in the fields after shirt signing, and them in the park after school.

Why can’t I be fucking happy like that? Why don’t I get to do a normal school life? Why don’t I get to do leavers assembly and shirt signing? And it’s not as simple as just going in even though I hate it. At first I was happy I never had to go back to it, but I’m becoming disconnected from my friends. I’m lonely. And I feel like I’m missing out. I always feel like I’m missing out.

Am I jealous? I feel a bit like a bad person complaining about my friends happiness. It seems like they don’t even miss me. I missed them, when they were not at school.

I got therapy and an autism diagnosis and basically got told my life will fucking suck forever but it’s fineeee because I can learn to manage it.

I’m missing school and my parents can’t just tell me to get over it and go because I need an education because I will sit in the toilets and cut myself until I feel dizzy and call them to pick me up. Whenever I go to that place I feel sick. I feel like anybody would jump me if I’m not cautious enough. They probably would, if there were not consequences, most people there have a disgusting moral compass.

I wish I was still suicidal? Can someone give me less fucking reasons to live because I have far too many. I hate that I’m technically getting better because I’m getting worse. Now the damage is irreversible and irreparable but at least I’m recovering, right?

I’m so lonely. Whenever my friends even look at me and wave I get so happy I internally shut down so I can’t return the enthusiasm. I’ve realised though that I’ll always be the ones following them around. They won’t walk to catch up to me, they won’t invite me to conversation. I don’t know if it’s my own insecurities but it really really feels like they don’t want me there or don’t realise I am there. I feel like a pity friend, I’m only there because I’m nicer than the rest of the school population but I’m nowhere near as cool and confident as the rest of them.

I can’t handle it. I’m naturally self-centred. I often switch between feeling like the best person and the whole conversation should revolve around me to feeling like everyone hates me probably because I’m so selfish and ugly and naturally disgusting. My expressions don’t fit on my face, I’m constantly depressed. I don’t even share many interests with them anymore.

I was at a local comic con a few weeks ago. I met up with my ‘con friends’ who I rarely see. I only stayed for a while because of my fucking autism again I’m missing out, but they seemed so sad when I left. One of them made a TikTok with me in it. We took a photo together. And when they were sad I left I wanted to cry because that’s so kind. They wanted me around? Me?

I’m going to a birthday party for one of my main friends on Saturday. He asked me if I was coming so I did because of course I want to be there. But does he even fucking want me there? I said I’d invite them over in the summer, do they even want to come? My other friend says he’ll sign my shirt if I come in tomorrow lunch, but I’m so depressed I’m not even sure I want to go. Now all I want to do is lie in bed and fucking eat gross shit and other stuff.

This has sent me into a super bad mood and idk what to do. Lowkey wanna relapse but it’s not gonna happen.

I’m so lonely. All my bonds are fading away. I’m so so so lonely.

I’m sick of fucking sitting in my bed, but it’s my favourite thing to do.

All this just because my friends took some pictures looking happy. I’m fighting the urge to just leave the group chat. I can’t let these stupid insecurities and instability show itself to others. I never tell anyone irl these things. Not even my therapist will hear about this. I’m ashamed and I fucking hate having and talking about my feelings.

Love y’all enjoy this bs lol x

[lythea-creation]

Caught on Camera - Shams x fem reader (Chapter 4)

Chapter 1

Previous Chapter

warnings: none

word count: 833

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“Hey (f/n)! Do you have any plans for tonight?”, Nadeen asked me on our way to class.

“No, why? You wanna hang out?”, I assumed.

“Kind of. I'm going to Omar's birthday party and you have to come along”, she requested.

“Omar as in Tasneem's boyfriend and Shams' brother Omar?”, I reassured.

“Exactly! He's actually pretty cool and some others from our class are gonna be there. But I'd just feel so much better if you were coming too” she proposed.

“I dunno, Nadeen. It's probably gonna end up in drama. And I don't really get along with Shams”, I considered.

“I thought you two had made up”, she recalled.

“Yeah, kinda. That doesn't mean we like each other all of a sudden”, I pointed out.

“Come on! We never really go out. It could be fun”, she tried persuading me further.

“Fine”, I agreed with a sigh.

“Yes”, she rejoiced. “Want me to pick you up?”

“Definitely. There's no chance I coming there alone. I'm not even invited”, I reminded her.

“Well. I invited you. I bet Omar won't mind”, she supposed.

“Whatever”, I brushed it off. “Wait! What am I gonna wear?”

I groaned.

“I'm sure you're gonna find something”, Nadeen encouraged me.

We had finally arrived in class and moved to our seats.

It did not take long until Miss Abeer started the class.

“Good morning, girls! Today you're going to do a partner project”, she announced.

Suddenly everyone began mumbling, deciding who was going to work together. Nadeen and I sent each other a glance as a sign to work together as well.

“Quiet”, Miss Abeer demanded. “You're not getting to pick your partner this time. Each of you is going to take one piece of paper. Then you need to find the matching number on it. And no switching or you're going to fail immediately.”

Instead of mumbling there were several groans resounding in the classroom now.

Reluctantly I picked a piece of paper and opened it up.

Everyone was already looking for their partner, some showing the number on their paper with their fingers.

It felt like my own fate was challenging me when I realized that I had ended up with Shams. Seriously! Was my life a freaking drama show or what?

“Guess we're stuck together once again”, I declared to her.

“Seems like it”, she shot back, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

For a second I considered talking about the birthday party with her, but decided against it. She would find out soon enough that I was coming as well.

I settled down at Shams desk and read the task.

Despite my initial reluctance I had to admit that I could have gotten way worse partners than Shams. She was working diligently and always asking for my opinion.

Yet we did not manage to finish on time.

“Guess we'll have to meet up then”, she suggested. “Wanna come over to my place this weekend? Can't today though.”

Of course she could not invite me over on her brothers birthday. She just did not know that I knew.

“Sure”, I agreed. “Just text or call me when you have time.”

I wrote my number down and handed it to her.

“I will”, she remarked.

“What is it with you and Shams that you always end up together?”, Nadeen wondered when we were eating lunch.

“I wish I knew”, I mumbled.

“How was working with her?”

“Actually great”, I confessed. “It didn't even feel like work to be honest. More like a fun research project together.”

“So Shams isn't that bad after all?”, Nadeen challenged me.

Her raised brow and the smirk she was wearing were giving me the urge to defend myself. But I could not. There was nothing I could resonate with.

“Yeah, maybe”, I admitted. “I don't even know why I want to hate her so much.”

“Ever considered that you actually like her?”, Nadeen proposed.

“What? How does that even make any sense?”, I shot back.

“Fear of rejection? Shams doesn't come along with a lot of people because she's so different. And she won't change herself to fit in. Maybe you're scared she won't accept you if you committed to it”, she resonated.

“That's ...” I wanted to say ridiculous, but that would be unreasonable. “Actually a likely possibility”, I realized defeated.

“I didn't mean to reflect myself on such a deep level, Nadeen”, I whined, which earned me a laugh from her side.

“Does it change anything though?”, she wondered.

“I dunno”, I stated.

“You could try and talk to her at the party”, Nadeen suggested.

“Thanks for making me even more anxious about coming”, I replied sarcastically.

“You're welcome”, she teased me. “Can't wait to see what you'll do.”

----------------------

Next Chapter

Since I'm so grateful to have yall as my readers, I decided to upload this chapter today as well. I hope you all like it.

Tag List: @sunwoniie

[saintirulan]

things from these days i loved 💓 #5:

guess who couldn't hear her alarm again 😙 thank god its only trial week so I don't think attendance matters yet. the courses yesterday were a bit,,, not it but i have a full day of cinema and photography ahead! 💖

I also got accepted into the homestay program and im going to meet a family soon!! <3

I also managed to get a hold of a suica card! basically they are tokyo's transportation card BUT they are currently mega hard to find because of a chip shortage. and let's say I was going crazy over the tokyo metro every single time I had to buy a ticket. its sooo complicated. and i always made everybody wait :( it got delivered super fast and the seller even put a small origami inside the package <3

wednesday was also a nice lovely day <3 after we were all done with lessons (one of which was absolutely bonkers, but at least i met a. again) me f. & k. went to eat out at ikebukuro and I had great sushi!!! I'm also glad we got to hang out with k. in a smaller setting because I'm kind of having a hard time understanding if he wants to be friends lol but seems so!!! (he made me try a station vending machine exclusive type of water that literally turns into jelly lol it was fun!!)

I also attended my one and only literature course and the professor seems very nice and part of the exam is just making a playlist for one of the short stories we're going to read and how cool is that!!! (italy could neverrr)

ive been super busy during trial week (basically you get to attend every course you want to check them out but then you have to decide and register officially, so ive been attending so many classes) so ive been eating lunch outside. im trying some konbini stuff and surprisingly their egg sandwiches are DIVINE i thought i would like them the least!!!

I also had some more awesome cinema related classes <3<3<3<3 i have a course thats called japanese film in comparative perspective but the professor essentially made it a socialising class where japanese students and international students can mingle and the exam is just making an ACTUAL movie together!!! and then at the end we will be hosting a uni academy ceremony (how FUN and CUTE is that!!!!)

It was also very funny because f. came to attend this one film class with me despite it really not being his thing and he was soooo uncomfortable with it all, he so wanted to run and he actually did at the first chance lmao

The movie class i had right after was also soooooo interesting...... im like overwhelmed by the amount of classes i want to take lol

we finally settled on the okinawa trip!!!!!!!! 💖💖💖 im so happy the guys were supportive of my idea, it has been on my bucket list FOREVER and I still haven't processed that I'll actually be in naha!!!!!!!!!!!! it's me, f. & j. so far (my bestiesss <3) but we could potentially invite two more people and we are,,, pondering 👀 id really be fine with just them, because the only other person I feel would not ruin the vibes is k. but hes settled on going north all on his own. maybe e. would be fun but I haven't spoken to him much!!! and f. and. j. both really like h. but he literally doesn't talk to me lmao we'll see 👀

we also finally ate takoyaki from the food truck outside campus and it was DELICIOUS <3<3<3

I have a super busy day ahead pray for me!!! I'll also have to explain to the japanese teacher that im still jet lagged and I couldn't go yesterday so I can't hand in my homework today sigh sigh sigh but I'll live 🙏🏻 and then I have all the photography course!!!