lunadoro

[izupie]

It really bothers me to see fanfiction writers discussing how to/how not to write certain characters. because I'm like, my dudes. we are on tumblr dot com. we are writing stories about our favourite characters like they're dolls in the dollhouses of our mind.

you can't be sitting there on some kind of fanfiction high horse preaching out that everyone "can't" write this certain character in the way you've decided that you, personally, don't like.

i don't care how many hits your fics have got - like that makes you valid?

filter out the tags you don't enjoy on ao3 by all means, but you can't turn around and say that the way you dislike them being written is 'wrong' - that's your opinion and that's great but it doesn't affect how someone else writes them.

who are you that your opinion matters more? who are you to be the judge and jury on what is in or out of character when you didn't even create them in the first place? sound confident and condescending all you want, doesn't make your opinion any more or less valid than any other fan in the fandom.

Write characters any way you want to. fanfiction is supposed to be fun. if another fan tries to police you about the way you've portrayed a certain character tell them that you hope their toast always burns. and that they need a new hobby.

[jonnywaistcoat]

What’s your opinion on the contrast between “silly” and “serious” spaces? Do you think people can have very serious interpretations about a genuine piece of media and also be goofy about it? I’m asking this particularly because I’ve seen people in the Magnus podcast fandoms fight about people “misinterpreting” characters you, Alex, and the many other authors have written. Are you okay with the blorbofication or do you really wish the media you’ve written would be “taken seriously” 100% of the time?

And follow up question, what do you think about the whole “it’s up to the reader (or in some cases, listener) to make their own conclusions and interpretations and that does not make them wrong”, versus the “it was written this way because the author intended it this way, and we should respect that” argument?

This is a question I've given a lot of thought over the years, to the point where I don't know how much I can respond without it becoming a literal essay. But I'll try.

My main principle for this stuff boils roughly down to: "The only incorrect way to respond to art is to try and police the responses of others." Art is an intensely subjective, personal thing, and I think a lot of online spaces that engage with media are somewhat antithetical to what is, to me, a key part of it, which is sitting alone with your response to a story, a character, a scene or an image and allowing yourself to explore it's effect on you. To feel your feelings and think about them in relation to the text.

Now, this is not to say that jokes and goofiness about a piece of art aren't fucking great. I love to watch The Thing and drink in the vibes or arctic desolation and paranoia, or think about the picture it paints of masculinity as a sublimely lonely thing where the most terrible threat is that of an imposed, alien intimacy. And that actually makes me laugh even more the jokey shitpost "Do you think the guys in The Thing ever explored each other's bodies? Yeah but watch out". Silly and serious don't have to be in opposition, and I often find the best jokes about a piece of media come from those who have really engaged with it.

And in terms of interpreting characters? Interpreting and responding to fictional characters is one of the key functions of stories. They're not real people, there is no objective truth to who they are or what they do or why they do it. They are artificial constructs and the life they are given is given by you, the reader/listener/viewer, etc. Your interpetation of them can't be wrong, because your interpretation of them is all that there is, they have no existence outside of that.

And obviously your interpretation will be different to other people's, because your brain, your life, your associations - the building blocks from which the voices you hear on a podcast become realised people in your mind - are entirely your own. Thus you cannot say anyone else's is wrong. You can say "That's not how it came across to me" or "I have a very different reading of that character", but that's it. I suppose if someone is fundamentally missing something (like saying "x character would never use violence" when x character strangles a man to death in chapter 4) you could say "I think that's a significant misreading of the text", but that's only to be reserved for if you have the evidence to back it up and are feeling really savage.

I think this is one of the things that saddens me a bit about some aspects of fandom culture - it has a tendency to police or standardise responses or interpretations, turning them from personal experiences to be explored into public takes to be argued over. It also has the occasional moralistic strain, and if there's one thing I wish I could carve in stone on every fan space it's that Your Responses to a Piece of Art Carry No Intrinsic Moral Weight.

As for authorial intention, that's a simpler one: who gives a shit? Even the author doesn't know their own intentions half the time. There is intentionality there, of course, but often it's a chaotic and shifting mix of theme and story and character which rarely sticks in the mind in the exact form it had during writing. If you ask me what my intention was in a scene from five years ago, I'll give you an answer, but it will be my own current interpretation of a half-remembered thing, altered and warped by my own changing relationship to the work and five years of consideration and change within myself. Or I might not remember at all and just have a guess. And I'm a best case scenario because I'm still alive. Thinking about a writers possible or stated intentions is interesting and can often lead to some compelling discussion or examination, but to try and hold it up as any sort of "truth" is, to my mind, deeply misguided.

Authorial statements can provide interesting context to a work, or suggest possible readings, but they have no actual transformative effect on the text. If an author says of a book that they always imagined y character being black, despite it never being mentioned in the text, that's interesting - what happens if we read that character as black? How does it change our responses to the that character actions and position? How does it affect the wider themes and story? It doesn't, however, actually make y character black because in the text itself their race remains nonspecific. The author lost the ability to make that change the moment it was published. It's not solely theirs anymore.

So yeah, that was a fuckin essay. In conclusion, serious and silly are both good, but serious does not mean yelling at other people about "misinterpretations", it means sitting with your personal explorations of a piece of art. All interpretations are valid unless they've legitimately missed a major part of the text (and even then they're still valid interpretations of whatever incomplete or odd version of the text exists inside that person's brain). Authorial intent is interesting to think about but ultimately unknowable, untrustworthy and certainly not a source of truth. Phew.

Oh, and blorbofication is fine, though it does to my mind sometimes pair with a certain shallowness to one's exploration of the work in question.

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗢𝗣𝗣𝗢𝗦𝗜𝗧𝗘

　　　　　　　　　𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: Where Y/N and Matt are polar opposites.

WARNING: None.

REQUESTED?: Yes, by @lightsgore

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Matt was not an extroverted person. Unsurprisingly, he was a quieter, more reserved guy who liked to have his own space and took his own time to say what he wanted if he was asked to do so. His mood would change drastically if he was forced to talk when or with whoever he didn't want to.

Y/N, on the other hand, looked like a little ball of light that wouldn't stay still. She had a habit of talking a lot in a short space of time, uttering words until she was out of breath. In addition to always seeming to be in a good mood, a smile decorating her face like a permanent tattoo. Energetic was the word that defined her.

Therefore, when she and Matt revealed their relationship to the public, many fans didn't understand the origin of their love, as they were very different, literally polar opposites.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"... Stop! Stop protecting your insecurities because you know you have an ass haircut, so you're projecting what could possibly happen to me! At least I'm willing to take that change." Nick screamed next to Y/N, moving his arms comically in exaggerated despair.

Chris laughed loudly at his speech, leaning his back against the car door from the passenger seat so that he could have a better view of the back. Matt smiled as he shook his head, watching them in the rearview mirror.

Y/N quickly nodded her head, her eyes wide as she raised her hands, showing that she wanted to initiate her own opinion on the matter.

"Exactly! You only try to diminish others because you are insecure about yourself. It's impossible to be friends with people like that. They are always trying to diminish someone, saying absurd things that cause so much discomfort." She spoke quickly, gesturing with her hands as her eyes darted between Nick and the rearview mirror, or rather, Matt's blue eyes.

Matt watched her with eyes full of love and affection, nodding his head in agreement to what she was saying.

"They're always talking bad about someone, have you noticed?" Y/N turned to face the blonde next to her, pointing her right index finger towards him, who hummed.

"Yes, exactly!" Nick shouted, slamming his hands against the back of Chris's seat, earning an angry shout from the boy.

"People can only give what they have inside themselves." Y/N finished her train of thought, shrugging as she licked her lips, wetting them.

Matt quickly reached for the bottle of his own tea in the cup holder between the front seats, opening the lid and turning his upper body towards the back, silently offering the drink to his girlfriend. She smiled big, sending a wink as a "thank you" before taking the bottle.

"It's good to have Y/N in a video with us. She speaks for both of them." Chris commented briefly, pointing to Y/N and Matt, letting out a hysterical laugh when he saw Matt rolling his eyes - but still not denying anything.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Matt was fast asleep. His head buried in the white pillow, and his body curled up like a burrito around the fluffy duvet. His mouth was half open, low snores escaping from between his lips. His eyelids trembled slightly, showing that his mind was sailing through dream land.

Y/N slowly opened the door with her elbow, her hands occupied by a wooden tray that held a simple but nutritious breakfast for two. The girl had a big smile decorating her face as she walked with light steps towards the bed.

She placed the tray on the closest bedside table in one quick movement before going to the windows, opening the black-out curtains, allowing the sunlight to illuminate the room completely.

A grumbling sound was heard from the bed, Matt lifting the duvet to the top of his head, still half asleep. Y/N smiled at his reaction, quickly walking to the bed, kneeling on the mattress and pulling the blanket off the boy, laying her chest on her boyfriend's bare one, bringing her face closer to his.

"Good morning, my love." She murmured against his cheek, sealing her lips over his skin repeatedly.

Matt grumbled again, his brow furrowing in false anger but pushing his face against hers lightly, enjoying the feeling of being showered in affection by his girlfriend.

"Come on baby, wake up!" Y/N asked a few seconds later - after seeing his eyes closing again -, her fingers pulling Matt's eyebrows up slightly, watching him forcefully open his blue orbs.

Her laughter echoed through the room as the boy pretended to go bite her, a smile spreading across his face instantly.

"It's such a beautiful day outside. I thought we'd have a picnic. Or we could go to that golf park. Oh oh oh, or we could cook that blackberry pie you wanted. We could also-" Her words came quickly, excitement evident in her voice.

Matt's sleepy brain took a few minutes to process what his girlfriend was saying, his head just nodding in agreement without even knowing what he was agreeing to.

"Can we?" Y/N's question caught his attention. Matt only opened his right eye, looking at her for a few seconds, trying to search in his mind what she was asking him to do without achieving any results.

Matt didn't understand how Y/N woke up with so much energy, while he needed at least 20 minutes to really feel alive.

"Yeah, sure." The brunette mentally shrugged his shoulders. She wouldn't have asked him to do something risky to their lives, so it was okay for him to accept it without knowing what it was. Right?

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Y/N knocked twice on the door of her shared room with Matt, the sound almost imperceptible. She turned the handle and opened it, entering the room slowly.

The sound of loud music escaped the brunette's headphones, which rested against his ears. The boy was sitting in his gaming chair, and his upper body bent slightly forward as his hands worked on the keyboard, probably answering emails sent to the Sturniolo Triplets inbox.

The girl walked with light and quick steps towards her boyfriend, a small smile on her face in excitement. She gently touched his right shoulder, alerting him to her presence.

Matt looked up, his eyes instantly brightening as he noticed Y/N there. His hands pushed the headphone back - leaving it hanging around his neck - while his feet moved on the floor, turning the chair so that he was facing her.

"Babe, it's raining." Y/N quickly said, without even waiting for him to talk.

Matt frowned, his hands moving up to her hips, lightly squeezing the covered area.

"Yeah, I know, honey." He nodded, confused as to why she would be telling him the obvious, the sound of heavy raindrops hitting the windows from outside filled the room.

"Can we dance in the rain? Please, please, please?" Y/N clasped her hands in front of her body in a sign of prayer, pleading with her eyes.

Matt raised his eyebrows, the thought of getting completely wet with the freezing rain made him shiver, his mind already imagining his clothes sticking to his skin.

He sighed, closing his eyes momentarily.

"What I wouldn't do for you?"

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"What do you guys want?" Madi asked as she stood up from her seat at the table on the fast food restaurant, ready to place the triplets' and Y/N's orders besides her own.

Nick quickly said what he wanted without taking his eyes off his phone, choosing the photos that he would put in that Friday's photo dump. Chris mumbled his order, resting his left cheek on his hand - which was supported on the table by his elbow -, his eyes focused on the digital menu on his own phone.

Madi nodded to the two before turning to Matt and Y/N, waiting for them to say what they wanted.

"For me, it's just going to be a cheeseburger and a Diet Coke. And Matt's going to have a double cheeseburger and a root beer." Y/N counted on her fingers as she said each food, watching Madi nod when she finished. "Thank you, Madi." She blew the brunette an air kiss.

Matt pressed his lips to the top of Y/N's head lightly before pulling her to rest the back of her shoulder against his chest.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"No, Chris, I don't want a blueberry donut." Matt rolled his eyes, huffing as he leaned his hips against the table, his arms crossed.

"You're hungry, and it's the only thing we have right now, Matt." Chris rolled his eyes back, exchanging looks with Nate, who smiled, amused by his reaction.

"What happened to you today? Did you wake up with the wrong foot?" Nick asked, his tone full of annoyance, wrinkling his nose.

"Why don't you shut-" Matt's sentence was interrupted by Y/N entering the kitchen, humming a Taylor Swift song under her breath.

"Oh, hi guys! Good morning." Y/N smiled brightly at the four of them, her eyes shining as she met Matt's, approaching him with quick steps - throwing smiles towards Chris, Nick, and Nate as she passed them. "Hi baby." She rose on her tiptoes, sealing his lips in a quick kiss.

A smile automatically grew on Matt's face, his eyes taking on a lovestruck look, all the anger he felt vanishing.

"Did you eat? I didn't see you eating breakfast earlier. You must be hungry." She asked, still facing him, her brow furrowed in concern as her right hand rested lightly on Matt's stomach, stroking the covered skin.

"No, baby. There's nothing interesting here." The boy sighed dramatically, ignoring his brothers' murmurs of disgust.

"We still have blueberry donuts, honey. There are some left over from the video you three made yesterday." Y/N pointed to the counter, where the box of donuts sat next to the stove. "You liked them, right?" She moved slightly away from Matt, reaching out and taking one before handing it to the boy.

Matt instantly smiled, taking the sweet from Y/N's hands with his right one and bringing it to his mouth, biting off a small piece. His left hand rested on Y/N's hip, caressing the area.

"It doesn't even look like he just-" Nick began his sentence, a look of disbelief on his face.

"Thank you, my love." Matt cut Nick off, sending a glare in his direction over Y/N's right shoulder before opening a big smile to her, biting off another piece.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"Hi, good afternoon! How are you?" Y/N greeted the McDonald's attendant, a big smile lighting up her face, as her eyes went to the board where the menu was displayed, mentally confirming what she was going to order.

The attendant smiled back quickly, her heart warming at finally being able to have a kind costumer who wasn't in a bad mood.

"Good afternoon! I'm great, thank you." She nodded momentarily, placing her fingers on the computer screen, ready to select the order. "What can I do for you today?" Her eyes went from Y/N to Matt, who was standing behind the girl.

His hands rested in the front pocket of the hoodie that covered his upper body, while an awkward smile spread across his face, nodding briefly.

Y/N started ordering calmly, including Chris and Nick's orders that she had already memorized - even though they both said they didn't want anything, she knew that Nick would end up biting a peace of her burger and Chris would steal Matt's fries -, giving the attendant time to select everything without rushing.

"Is that all for today?"

"Yes, that's all." Y/N confirmed, taking Matt's wallet out of her purse and taking out her card, quickly paying for the order. "Thank you so much. Have a nice day!"

Matt quickly mumbled a "thank you" before intertwining his fingers with Y/N's, allowing her to pull him toward a table.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Yes, they were polar opposites, but Matt and Y/N showed every day that opposites really do attract each other.

taglist:

@lustfulslxt @ladybunny44 @worldlxvlys @earth2starkey @remussbitch @freshloveforthefit @il0vebeingdelulu @sturniolowhore @mimi-luvzyu @alorsxsturn @urfavgirllyyyyy @domizzzsstuff @sturnizd @hearts4chris @cupidzsq @dracoflaco @leah-loves-lilies @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @rootbeerworshiper

(If you want to be added to the taglist, go to this post)

[dewsgremlin]

✨Excuse me, but I'm slightly pissed.✨

There are so many of really toxic and weird Ghost fans out there.

Calling Per out for blocking them, after insulting his dog and calling it ugly. What the hell is wrong with these people?! Like what do you expect if you insult other peoples pets? If it was my dog and someone calling my dog ugly and stuff, i would also block them. Now, they're calling Per out for blocking them, because he is Soooo MeAn AnD rUdE for that.

Also, "fans" cancelling him because his girlfriend used a song in her story from a band, where one band member was lately problematic. (Addition: It was brought to my attention that she also had a show with the band in question. I only saw the wave of hate about using a song of them in her story)

Well, let's hope that these "fans" also break up with every friend who knows someone who did something problematic or listened to some problematic band. I really don't understand why he is always held responsible for everything that people around him do. And I'm sorry but writing him hate messages because his girlfriend was "supporting" a band with a problematic band member is soo fucked up. Also, most metal bands did something problematic. I bet, Taylor Swift was problematic at some point too. Why not just quitting listening to music completly, if that's such a issue?

Also, you can think about his girlfriend whatever you want, but blaming him for everything she does? Like why? Is he her parent to tell her what to do? Btw you don't eve know if he agrees with her the whole time? Maybe they have arguments, about specific topics because they don't have the same opinion? Just saying.

Also hating on his previous relationships? Especially when his ex girlfriend wasn't even famous and didn't say anything in public, just wanted to live her life and people found a way to pick on her. Really fucked up times back then.

And why is this always about Per? The other bandmembers aren't saints, too. But they don't get even nearly as much as hate as Per. I saw some of the hate messages he got and they were insane - and he still was so polite to them.

Also hating on Per cause of his relationship? But being fine with the other members hanging out with his girlfriend and supporting "problematic Per"?

And why do that people think, they are better human beings because "cancelling everything problematic" but writing hate messages and stuff. Yeah, makes sense.

Cheers to all the moralists who preach water but drink wine. 🍷 You're sOoOoOo MuCh BeTtEr

[no-psi-nan]

Haha no worries! It's downplayed a lot in the series because it's supposed to be a comedy, but when you start looking more closely at the stuff Kuniharu does, it paints a picture of a terrible father and a bad husband too.

It's been a topic on the blog several times, so I'm sure people can chime in with more evidence, but here's what's off the top of my head...

Raised Kusuke. Nuff said tbh lol.

Kuniharu calls Kusuo a monster multiple times and is almost certainly the reason why Kusuke and Kusuo himself believe that Kusuo is an inhuman freak. This attitude is certainly not coming from Kurumi, and nobody else knew about Kusuo's power. From the beginning of the series, Kusuo genuinely believes he's unable to connect with other human beings, and it's mostly because of this attitude inherited from his father.

Kuniharu is never seen attempting to prevent Kusuke from constantly picking fights with his brother, and only attempting to discipline Kusuo for behavior that Kuniharu considers disrespectful to him. This is mostly a fact by omission, but we do see him belittling Kusuke when the kid obviously already has an inferiority problem.

Kuniharu is one of the worst performers at his job and the first to be let go in the case of a crisis. When he loses his job, he's unable to find any others because his only real skill is shoe-licking. This was a parody chapter though so questionably canon. He's always running late for his job though and we see him trying to make a manga artist rip off Naruto, so honestly it makes sense that he's that bad at his job. The only time he's shown as slightly competent at his job was during a parody chapter too hsfjdlshfks.

However what's definitely canon is that he either doesn't make much money or mis-spends most of it. In an area where Nendo's mom, a single woman, and Satou's family, the exact average family, can afford to live, Kuniharu had to take out an 80 year mortgage to pay for a similarly sized home. For context, most mortgages are for 30 years, 15 if you git gud. Btw, the house was literally a gift from Kusuke, Kuniharu insisted on paying out of manly pride or something. Sir, Kusuke is a freaking billionaire and this is like the only single no-strings-attached genuinely kind thing he's ever done hsfjdlshfks

Completely irresponsible with money: has a huge Valentine's day budget for his wife's gift ($3,000 iirc?) and then spends it all at the bar paying for his coworkers' drinks (the same guys who abuse him at his job and think he's garbage). He also spends huge amounts of money on his model figure collection, and has a whole room of gym equipment he never uses. As a result, Kusuo has a very small allowance and for some reason, his one favorite food (coffee jelly) is not included in the grocery list. Even though Kusuo canonically gets insane rock bottom prices for literally everything that gets bought in the household. How do you fuck up so badly financially that you can't buy your clinically depressed son the one (inexpensive!) thing that brings him joy??

By the way, Kuniharu started dating Kurumi when he was a college student and she was in high school. Kusuke was born like a year after they met, so you can do the math about how little time he spent before knocking her up 😬 They basically had a shotgun wedding. No wonder Kurumi's dad is NOT a fan of Kuniharu...

Literally one of the first chapters is Kuniharu and Kurumi domestic violence but make it funny. They're throwing furniture, Kuniharu is breaking the windows, Kurumi is yeeting her husband, and all this shit is over a single coffee jelly, which again, should be a normal part of the groceries for their household. They constantly bring their son into this drama too, which I'm sure is fantastic for his mental and emotional development btw.

There's a manga exclusive chapter that's a parody, so questionably canon, but in it Kuniharu physically attacks Kusuo multiple times over differences in opinion.

However, it IS canon that Kuniharu takes any opportunity to try to physically harm Kusuo. Ex. Hitting him in the massage episode and trying to step on him when he turns tiny.

Canon tries to redeem him a bit by showing moments where Kusuo is a baby and Kuniharu is trying really hard to make him smile because he wants his baby boy to be happy. Unfortunately that just makes it seem like he tried to be a good father for a bit when Kusuo was a baby, and then as soon as Kusuo's powers developed enough to make him miserable (the time when he needs the MOST familial support!), Kuniharu just gives up, and starts using Kusuo as his personal genie in a bottle. While also trying to fix his own fragile ego by attempting to establish dominance over his son. ????? Get therapy bro.

Canon also shows that Kuniharu's love points for Kusuo are the same as for his wife, however, not even Kuniharu believes that, as he tries to run away to evade it hsfjdlshfks. And even if he does love his son that much, he certainly doesn't show it in any meaningful way, because his literal MIND-READING SON doesn't know that. There are plenty of parents who truly love their kids and still abuse them like hell because they think that's the right thing to do (see Kaido's mom being overly strict because she wants to see him succeed in life), so the love points don't mean much imo.

Kuniharu does dole out a couple of pieces of wisdom (at Kusuo's wrong date birthday party and in the volcano arc) but that really doesn't make up for anything and even his wife thinks he's childish so... 🇫

Kuniharu is definitely funny as a character, and like I said, most of this requires digging into canon a little more, but once you start looking, it becomes clear that Kuniharu is just not a good person, father, or husband.

Like, I totally get that having a genius and a god as your kids would not be easy for any parent, but Kuniharu really doesn't try to make life better for either of his sons, preferring to get into petty squabbles with his wife and play video games/build models the rest of the time. I'm not saying dads can't have hobbies, but the only times we see him spending time with Kusuo is usually when he's begging for a favor, and he also clearly does zero housework whatsoever, so...

Anyways, I think Kurumi deserves a better husband and Kusuo deserves a better parent (or at least a break from being used as a magical favor vending machine lol) so I often joke on here that Kurumi should get a divorce and run polls about who she should marry instead and such!

Hope this helps! 👍🏾 Thanks for the question!

[paranoidginger]

My personal rankings of different tf2 ships that I've seen!!

1- I don't like it at all. 10- I love it!!

Heavy x Medic: 11/10 I absolutely adore them together, they're perfect for each other.

Heavy x Spy: 5/10 not my personal favorite, but I don't hate it.

Heavy x Sniper: 2/10 I've never actually seen this one before, but I don't really care for it.

Heavy x Scout: 2/10 again, not a huge fan. I honestly see Heavy as more of a father figure to scout.

Heavy x Pyro: 5/10 another one I haven't seen before, but I don't mind the idea of it. Their chemistry could be interesting.

Heavy x Soldier: 6/10 I haven't seen very much of this ship, but I do think they're funny together. They definitely have some potential.

Heavy x Demo: 5/10 another I haven't seen before, not quite sure how to feel.

Heavy x Engie: 5/10 POOTIS-

Demo x Soldier: 9/10 only docking a point because I see them more as platonic soulmates over being in a romantic relationship.

Demo x Medic: 5/10 not a personal favorite, but they are definitely funny together.

Demo x Scout: 5/10 another one that I don't feel very strongly towards.

Demo x Pyro: 7/10 Fire and explosions, my friends.

Demo x Engineer: 6/10 I can see them as drinking buddies when they aren't on the field.

Demo x Spy: 4/10 never seen it before, don't care about it either.

Demo x Sniper: 10/10 I wish they had more interactions together in the comics with both of them conscious. Swordvan is in my top three for sure.

Engie x Scout: 1/10 not a fan of this one at all. I see Engie as far more of a father figure than a romantic interest for Scout.

Engie x Soldier: 7/10 not my preference, but they can definitely be cute together.

Engie x Pyro: 0/10 They are literally family in my mind, Engiedad moment.

Engie x Medic: 8/10 They're definitely besties, but I don't really ship them myself, personally.

Engie x Sniper: 4/10 I don't think I've seen this one before. I don't care all that much for it though.

Engie x Spy: 10/10 Perfect slow burn dynamic, I love them together.

Medic x Spy: 5/10 I can understand why people enjoy it, it's just not my cup of tea

Medic x Sniper: 5/10 again, just not my personal favorite.

Medic x Scout: 1/10 Yet another situation of me seeing a character as Scout's father figure.

Medic x Soldier: 5/10 another uncommon one! They do have their charm together, I can say that.

Medic x Pyro: 4/10 I don't care very much about this one.

Sniper x Scout: 8/10 I fully understand why people like this ship so much, for me, however, it is simply outweighed by swordvan.

Sniper x Soldier: 5/10 not sure how to feel about it, it's another very uncommon one.

Sniper x Pyro: 4/10 don't like this one a whole lot, even though I haven't seen it much.

Sniper x Spy: 1/10 Unpopular opinion, I know. It just feels weird knowing that Sniper is the same age as Scout, who is Spy's son.

Spy x Scout: -9999999/10 WHO THE HELL WOULD SHIP THIS- straight up NASTY.

Spy x Soldier: 5/10 I feel pretty neutral on this one.

Spy x Pyro: 2/10 I just don't see it happening.

Scout x Soldier: 4/10 I don't hate it, but I don't like it very much.

Scout x Pyro: 9/10 I think they have a lot of potential together! I like to call the ship "Hotwings" because it's funny.

Soldier x Pyro: 2/10 I really just don't see it happening, tbh.

Honorable mentions!

Pauling x Scout: 0/10 Scout, you dumbass, she's a lesbian.

Soldier x Zhanna: 10/10 They're both so dumb, but so adorable together.

Saxton x Bidwell: 10/10 Yes. Simply, yes.

Admin x Pauling: 0/10 Ew.

My top 3 tf2 ships are!!!!

Heavymedic

Engiespy

Swordvan

I do apologize for the lack of Poly ships in this list, this on its own was a lot to keep track of, lol.

[laf-outloud]

Hi, I hope it's okay to vent this out here. I'm sorry, I just don't know where I can safely share this opinion and criticism and not get attacked for it so I hope it doesn't have any hate tossed your way if you decide to post this (if you don't, that's totally fine, I understand, I don't want you to get attacked either).

I've admittedly been a fan of Jensen for the last few years, Supernatural longer, but recently more and more my respect and appreciation of him as an individual has been waning. I still appreciate the characters he plays, the shows he's on, him as a performer, but as a person, he has been straight up saying (and doing) some problematic things that have opened my eyes and pulled me out of the stream of blind consciousness known as AA-world. From what happened with prequelgate (which history has now shown just how much of a cash cow it was and how shady he acted about it, this new One Tree Hill show proving this is how the Ackles apparently conduct themselves professionally) to "Bitch Alba" to the way he speaks about his kids sometimes (and that includes Danneel, I'm not a fan of hers but in general, that's how you talk about your wife and mother of your three kids?), the inflating of his ego, the constant adaptation of his demeanor depending on who he's with (Misha and JDM are the worst, he acts like Misha and he always seems to want to impress JDM), "old titties", and now last night. My respect for him was slowly sliding down to the bottom of the mountain of all of these things he's been doing and saying lately, and then it finally flatlined last night.

I'm all for respecting people's political beliefs and even though I can't stand Misha (I have never had a good feeling about that guy even before I found out all of his problematic history in the fandom and how now it's painfully obvious how attention seeking he is), I have to admit that the guy has been consistent when it comes to his politics and taking action. Despite my dislike for him, I do believe he is very genuine when it comes to that particular arena. I saw it in action with the last election for example, so this one didn't surprise me that he got involved with some of the Harris-themed livestreams. Had Jared been there (I have no idea if he was invited, couldn't make it, or what), I do feel that he would have been genuine in his presence there as well as his answers. He's a genuine guy who appears to wear his heart on his sleeve a lot. Mark was very genuine. Jim Beaver, too. Curtis. They all listed why they were there and why they were voting for Harris.

Then there was Jensen. Sigh. To be fair, I didn't see the whole Boys section so perhaps he answered further during that segment if Eric or someone else asked him, but during the Supernatural one...I couldn't believe what I was seeing and hearing. I'm not defending him (obviously) but I do think nerves played somewhat of a part because he looked a bit uncomfortable, but that still doesn't excuse (in my opinion) how disingenuous his answer was. I can understand the kids part because that absolutely makes sense, but he worded it in a way that made it sound like a) that was the only reason he was voting this way & b) almost as if it was their fault so if anyone got annoyed with him voting for Harris, they're being used as a tool to keep people appeased. Because how can you argue or get mad or disappointed in his choice if he's doing the right thing as any parent would and consider their kids' futures? And here's the thing, I never would have thought that it sounded like a ploy had he not done this previously at cons, when meeting fans, in interviews, etc. He always downplays something he says or does that he thinks is going to be problematic for his fanbase and shifts responsibility in a way that isn't super obvious (except to those of us paying attention and not drinking the AA kool-aid). He may have been aggressive with the whole "hate watch" commentary about TW but he even eventually set up Danneel, the cast, and others to be blamed if it didn't work out. There is ALWAYS one reason or another that he throws up there on why no one should or would ever blame him. So that's why this one, while yes a valid reason (and could be part of the real reason he chose this candidate), it sounded like yet another shield to throw up "don't blame me if you don't like my choice, I have kids and I have to do what's right for them, don't get mad at me" etc.

Then he tries to stall to think of something he can say that's non-specific (and non-committal in my opinion) by making the joke that Mark just listed the many reasons, the several various reasons, everyone is there. That's a copout if I've ever seen one.

Then he says "When you look at the two candidates, there's just no question of who I want to be on the right side of history with." This to me is the most disingenuous of all. Having watched this guy speak publicly the last few years, this reeks of image to me and not genuine endorsement or even concern for the kids' futures he just referred to or about any policies or the direction the country should head in or hope or change or anything. It's about "who I want to be on the right side of history with". Who even says that except someone thinking ahead on how this will affect their image and if they're not on the "right side of history" with? I get it, he's an actor, he has to think about his image in that way and how it will affect his present and future work opportunities, and Misha did indeed corner him by purposely drawing attention to Jensen specifically and asking him that question (to be fair, he wasn't the only one asked during that segment and who answered), but come on. I believed Curtis when he spoke. I believed Jim when he spoke. I believed Mark when he spoke. I even believed Misha (like I said, yuck about the guy, but he is genuine in this one topic). But Jensen saying that just royally pissed me off because to me it was so obvious that he truly doesn't give a shit as to why everyone else is there. (the same guy who has a public platform and could use it for something other than himself or his brewery for example) He was there because of Vought Rising and Soldier Boy being up front and center, because of Amazon Prime and Countdown, and to "be seen". That's it. He wasn't there because he wanted to be an activist like Misha or because he truly believes in Harris or the Democractic party or any politics (except Hollywood's). I know he's been part of political events and discourse before (I forgot how long ago he and Danneel were at that campaign event in Texas after endorsing that candidate and Danneel has spoken about politics before on social media when they lived down there), but this just reeked of "opportunity" to me and not the kind Harris keeps talking about. It was purely self-serving and good PR for him (in his and his team's minds anyway). Why do I believe that? Because he then follows it up with "But for my kids" as the last thing he says on the subject. Once again, throwing that you'd-be-an-asshole-to-question-this-reasoning shield up.

My respect for him as an individual person completely tanked once he finished speaking. Totally, without a doubt, fully disingenuous bullshit answer in my opinion. I'm not saying this because I expect him to be fully committed to his politics or this election or passionate about any of it like someone like Misha for instance. It's not because I wanted to hear him say something different. It's not about his political beliefs or mine or anyone else's. That's not why this was so disappointing (and slightly infuriating if I'm honest) to me. It's because it was more of the same crap from him, just in a different arena. And this election, no matter who you vote for, no matter which party, really matters. I truly believe that. Like any election. Rich celebrities are always trotted out during these times to help sway the vote one way or another, and to be able to tell the hard-working middle class what's best for them while their bank accounts and tables are full, sitting in a cushy house (or mansion) and never having to worry about their kids' education. Because rich celebrities always know what's right for the American people of various economic and living situations as a whole (can you sense my sarcasm here?).

So in my opinion, it's like, if you're going to sign up to do one of these things, then nut up or shut up. Not saying he has to divulge his private thoughts on the matter or go knocking on doors like some, but if you're going to use this for PR and so people can continue thinking "well" of you (and thinking of you period) and everyone around you states something realistic in relation to the event you are there for, then perhaps don't continue your usual bullshit? Perhaps don't make it obvious that you're only there to get PR perks and bonus points with your friends and those who can employ you/are employing you? Don't be so fucking transparent that you don't mind being up front and center in front of the camera for Supernatural (I know he stayed in the back of The Boys one, but I personally think it had to do with Karen and Erin being there, that's not me implying anything about them or him, more like implying something about his image and Danneel, etc) but then looking like you'd rather be elsewhere when the not-a-surprise question is then posed to you of why you're there? And maybe not make some awkward joke about alcohol while you stall for time to think of the most neutral self-conscious image-positive answer you could think of, all while throwing your kids up as a shield?

Maybe you disagree with me and you didn't see his answer that way. Maybe some others might, too, and that's cool if you or any of them do. We should all think for ourselves (I think one of the most important messages to come out of the Supernatural segment of the livestream last night). But for me, it was beyond disappointing that this was yet another confirmation that this guy appears to be full of shit everywhere we turn, and that he thinks all of his fanbase is that stupid and unable to see it for what it is, newsflash: not all of us are AA's, Jensen, some of us actually use that big spongy thing inside our heads). And it's even more frustrating that any other celebrity can be called out for this bullshit ploy online, no matter their wealth or status in the industry, including his castmates on any show, and yet you can't say a fucking word of genuine criticism when it comes to him. Instead, you have to enroll yourself in the Ackles Critic Protection Program and state anything less than a "he's king and she's queen and they can do no wrong ever" mentality anonymously. So, that all being said, I've lost complete respect for him and I'm done being a fan of his. That doesn't mean I hate Dean or Supernatural all of a sudden or any of his work, I can compartmentalize, but when it comes to the actor/individual himself, nope, no more. He can keep his sheeple of a stanbase who will be there to keep swallowing and buying (literally) the bullshit he gives and sells them. I'll be over here, actually using my brain and eyes that were given to me, and I'll head off on my merry way.

I'm truly sorry for the long rant, but that really bothered me last night and put me off of him for good. This is the last time I'm even going to refer to him online. I truly feel sorry for those who can't (and those who won't) see past the image he projects. Maybe that's why most of his fanbase focuses shallowly on his looks most of the time. Perhaps that is a reflection of the individual.

A public persona who likes their private life private is one thing, but this is a whole other in my opinion. Never meet your heroes is very true, but I would add to that never look for any authenticity that doesn't come with a dollar sign or Instagram follower count attached from them either. Extremely disappointing.

Thanks for letting me get that out. Again, if you don't want to post this, I wouldn't blame you. If you do decide to post, I hope no one attacks you for my stated opinion. If they do... 🐑 Enough said. Thanks for listening.

I've had a few people rant in my inbox before. Welcome!

It was easy to see last night who's truly engaged in the process and who isn't. Though, I will disagree about Misha. He may be vocal and consistent, but he's still only doing it for attention and exposure. He even said early on that the reason he got into politics, and then acting, was to be famous.

And while I don't believe everyone has to be as passionate about politics as someone else (I'm certainly not), I do see what your saying about Jensen's appearance. It felt very rehearsed and disingenuous, like he was there simply because Eric's his boss and that it would be good publicity. Frankly, there are other ways to get publicity than attending any event and acting disinterested the majority of the time. The most sincere words that came from Jensen were when he was saying Hi to Cory Booker.

As for his politics, there's only one time I saw a genuine interest from Jensen and that was when he supported a bill that would help his brewery. I don't expect him to share his politics with the world, but if he's going to attend a political rally event, he should at least act more interested than what we saw. He is an actor, after all.

[alicepao13]

Hudson and Rex S02E16 - Flare of the Dog

Ah. Title puns. Okay, fine, that's decent, in my opinion anyway. What a good episode, though. I'm a fan of whump. Did I mention that?

"You know that real cops drink their coffee black". You've only had lattes all season, what the fuck???

Jesse is once again manning the office on his own. I hope they're paying him some overtime at least.

If you actually pause the screen when the arsonist is ready to throw the Molotov cocktail, then it's case closed.

RIP Charlie Hudson.

What do you mean, he got away without a scratch (and a busted ankle)? That blew up on his face! Oh, I know. Rex's tongue has healing properties.

I'll take your word for it, Joe. Since we didn't see it at all.

Dude expects to be instantly fine after that. Again, you're lucky you have your face intact.

Why no Sarah, by the way?

Um, are you serious? He just woke up.

I imagine it was the part where you told him to shake it off. Make up your mind, Donovan.

That might be the most thirsting anyone has ever done in this show.

Bud's wife is so sweet. And the scene is so sad.

That's putting it mildly, actually.

A firefighter who appears for the first time in an arson case AND flirts with Sarah? Yeah, who else could have done it? This is how I mostly find the culprit now. Through extensive experience in crime show plots.

"This is a secure area. I'm gonna have to ask you to leave". We are the police, Miss Red Herring.

We're stealing brownies now. Rex and Charlie are so bored.

Nurse: "Looks like you're diagnosed with lateral malingus". Charlie: "Malleolus". Nurse: "Yeah. Mallegolus. Magolus". I'd be feeling so safe in that hospital after this.

You wish. They're actually from the guy who tried to murder you. Charlie's disappointed "Ah" after that is closer to "ew".

Rex, my favorite judge of character. Except for that one time with Eva, although I believe they said that he was drawn to her because she was sick and he could sense it? Something like that.

Rex: What is your wannabe murderer doing in your hospital room and flirting with my wannabe mom, and also can I bite him?

Charlie: *notices the flirty vibe* I was literally gone for like half a day, what the fuck happened?

Oh I forgot that Joe's shotgun survived until S2 apparently. Might not be the same one, though.

Show, don't tell. In what way, shape, or form has that been showcased so far?

Jesse: [Charlie] would agree that this is a Bible verse. Charlie: I'm guessing it's an acronym. Oof. Tough loss.

IMHO means in my humble opinion? Not in my honest opinion?

It won't hurt you to sit your ass down for a few days. Or, well, it will, but it won't be the rest. Just the murderous psycho.

That's cute.

Good news, Jesse. You get to interview someone.

Oh, he's totally doing this on purpose.

*Charlie sees Sarah's caller ID* Charlie: Hey Sarah ☺️☺️☺️ Rex: ☺️☺️☺️ Sarah: I'm here with *longest pause ever* Asher. Charlie: 🙄🙄🙄 Rex: 😠😠😠

"Maybe the police should stick to investigating and the fire department should stick to inspections". Yeah, I bet you'd love that, Charlie. Jeez, the jealousy.

Charlie: Rex lost a partner. Rex: Don't tell my tragic backstory to him!

I think I can see the makeup cover work for John Reardon's arm tattoo.

Jesse: "This is nice. You know, you and I just figuring stuff out together. I like playing the Charlie". Sarah: "I'm the Charlie in this situation". lol. Also, what was it with that look, Jesse?

And now the mafia is involved.

"You could take Rex". Subtle way to get your partner to look out for the woman you like.

Listen, I might be making some shit up but I'm not making this up.

I'd say it actually looks pretty bad but given the very bad makeup work I've seen lately on 911 that should be better than this show, I'll just say this: Either get your actors to agree not to get tattoos in easily visible places or work the tattoo into the story, which is the normal thing to do. There's nothing in Charlie's backstory that suggests he'd never get a tattoo so I don't see what the problem was, and they eventually did it anyway.

"I'm gonna get all the head rubs I can before that guy runs away with my mom."

They took our case! Oh, well, we'll still investigate.

Drama queen Charlie Hudson, everyone.

She declared St.John's to be in a state of emergency for that? Just for that?

Okay, seriously, the "special police" sounds ridiculous. I hope that's not actually a thing, Canada.

Jesse: "And this is where I remind you that every time I go out in the field, something bad happens. I've been shot! I've been drowned!" This is actually a level of awareness that most crime show characters are incapable of displaying. Including Charlie.

"Our greatest weapon is Rex and Rex runs on snacks" lol

Jesse: Rex track! Charlie: Not now, Jesse. Rex: Rex don't track?

You know, yay for the whump and all, but I'm not a foot fetishist and we've seen Charlie's feet get too much screentime.

What's he looking at? God?

Charlie is in danger! *cut to commercial*

Jesse: I'm the Charlie. Rex: Fuck this, I'll just solve the case like I usually do anyway.

I like that in the scene where Sarah realizes Asher is the arsonist, one of our classic background tracks is playing and right on the moment she comes to the realization, it abruptly stops. It's the little things.

Oh, yeah, we're fucked.

Delicious. Finally some good fucking whump.

Asher: "Stop, Charlie. It won't do you any good". Well, he'll die for sure if he doesn't try so it won't do him any bad either.

Ouch. One with the floor.

"I'll toast at your funeral, Charlie". Motherfucker, up until that point you hadn't reached piece-of-shit levels because I've seen too many villains but after that, I wanted to watch you die.

"I'll take care of Rex for you". Like anyone would let you. I half expected him to say "and Sarah".

Sad AU where the reveal didn't happen, Charlie was killed and no one suspected Asher. Asher and Sarah started dating, Sarah adopted Rex, who of course never warmed up to Asher but he brushed it aside as, "he's just missing his partner and he thinks I'm replacing him in some way," which to Sarah doesn't even make sense, because she didn't know that Charlie liked her but Asher had realized it the minute he had stepped into that hospital room. Time goes by, and Sarah is noticing more and more things about Asher that don't add up, odd phone calls, smoke smell when he's not on duty, and such. She goes to Joe to share her suspicions and along with Jesse, they quietly reopen the investigation. The truth is, of course, shocking. That man had been to Charlie's funeral, had dated Sarah for months. There is no good ending, I mean, how could there be in this case? After arresting Asher, he tells Sarah that he's certain Charlie had a thing for her, which makes her feel even worse. Then Sarah goes to his grave with Rex and tells Charlie that they finally got his killer. But even as she tells him, she can't stop thinking of all the times that she'd gone to Charlie's grave with flowers and Asher had insisted on accompanying her and Rex, Rex's low growls and whines every time Asher went with them, and she now knew it was because Rex could tell: Asher had been practically dancing on Charlie's grave. [Sorry about that.]

Oh, I enjoyed Jesse whacking him. It wasn't much but it was something.

And closing the episode by making friends at the fire department and making Rex an honorary firefighter.

We literally never saw them again.

Aside from everything else, I also liked how the rest of the team took up roles that they don't usually do when Charlie was incapacitated. That was fun to see.

[ryker-writes]

Because I love hearing people gush about their favs: Why do you like Sebek so much?

oh boy you're in for a ride

I love Sebek so much because not only is he adorable but he's super cool! I tend to love characters that are strong but can also be silly like Sebek is a knight but he could also get wrapped up in the randomness and no-brain activities with everyone! His passion and loyalty to Malleus are very admirable and you can't convince me he wouldn't be just as passionate and loyal to his friends and partner. He's a hardworking knight who actually takes those he cares about into great consideration and looks out for them and trusts them. He won't let anyone shame or slander those he cares about and sticks to his beliefs. I also tend to love knight/general characters in most fandoms too. But Sebek is so adorable! Seeing him makes me feel happy. I would sit down and listen to him talk about Malleus all day and I would also want to tell him that I see him the same way he sees Malleus. Sure, he can be loud and blunt and has his opinions on humans but I do think that his attitude towards humans comes mainly from Briar Valley culture than anything. His loud nature is cute and I like people who can be more blunt and not dance around things. Sebek is a great protector and I love him so much like I want to give him so much affection and would love to just be by his side

I also know a lot of little facts about Sebek that I will now ramble about because they're all so cute.

Horses are scared of Sebek and he's actually scared of them too (something we have in common)! He joined the equestrian club because he thinks every knight should be able to ride a horse and he didn't look into the other clubs much! He also doesn't do well in the cold and prefers warmer climates! It's because of this that he enjoys the Botanical Garden because it's warm and he struggled with the cold in the Harveston event. Sebek also is a big reader and has borrowed books from Azul and was gifted a rare book for his birthday from Azul! He was actually a late bloomer when it comes to magic too. When he was a kid he would be in awe watching his siblings use magic and light candles! Speaking of siblings, he has an older brother and a older sister but both of them are much older than him. They used to go on family fishing trips too! Sebek admires his mom a lot for being a strong and capable fae and has mixed feelings about his father. He doesn't understand why his mom fell for a human dentist (or why his human father was living in Briar Valley in the first place), but his mom is said to have fell in love despite the disapproval of everyone around her because he was human. Sebek has also said that his father loves to give him and his siblings gifts a lot and Sebek doesn't understand it much. Sebek takes great care in his appearance and even uses hair gel to slick his hair back every morning because he wants to look his best in front of Malleus. He even wants to grow his hair out like Malleus! He even has a picture of Malleus in his room that he greets and says goodbye to every time he leaves or enters. We also hear of some cute moments about when Sebek was younger. Malleus once gave a small Sebek a cookie and he carried it around with him everywhere and treasured it but cried when it accidentally broke. He also used to be very scared on Halloween and would even wet the bed and Silver once promised him to stay awake and hold his hand the entire night. Silver fell asleep though and Sebek considers him a traitor because of it. Sebek also has a large appetite and thinks the school food is lacking and doesn't have enough protein. He likes meat and isn't much of a fan of black coffee, but still drinks black coffee because Malleus drinks it. He's also jealous of Kalim and Jamil's relationship and wishes he could've been born earlier to take care of Malleus.

[sky-kiss]

hello <3 I’ve been lurking around the raphael tag little niche and I see that a fairly popular concept is tav/durge duchess (love the concept love the energy, very big fan of it in your fic as well) and I was wondering, since raphael struggles with sort of minimising how much his mortal side is perceived in favour of appearing as much as possible as a devil with a capital D (see his celebratory paintings being all about his devil form), whether that by itself would be a peculiar choice to take a mortal as a consort. or if you think he sort of did the math and went well tav/durge is a very effective asset he can keep close and its sort of worth it take the loss of sort exposing himself to other archdevils being judgemental over it (especially since the hells seem very much like a only devils can sit at the grown up table lmao)

/Stares at you. Sighs. Sips scotch/

So, I see. You're finally here to kill me, anon.

Alright. Let's get into it. If we're being entirely honest, I do not believe that Raphael would offer Tav/Durge a place as his consort. I genuinely don't. Especially not directly after they've given him the Crown. I've done it a few times recently, mostly because it's the only place to conveniently put it. And it works for short-form posts.

But if we are talking about genuine Raphael, it's my opinion that he would not offer. He may be fond of you, but his version of fondness would translate more to like...how fond you are of a good dog, or a subcontractor who put in great work. You aren't equals. "Friends," but not equals. Raphael's interest in Tav/Durge stems from what they can provide him. Once he has the Crown, he sees himself as having succeeded. You might meet for drinks like he's promised, but he has no reason to continue the relationship.

However, there is something to be said for an adventurer's soul. And Tav/Durge would be a massive catch further down the line. By the endgame, the TadFools are a bunch of freaks if we're power scaling. They're only level 12, but the games mechanics and the psycho gear they acquire allows them to punch well above their weight class. With their stat blocks, their party of four could probably fight Zariel. And on that note, because of game mechanics, Raphael could probably take Zariel (based on her 5E statblock) in a cage match, even without the Crown. He'd at least make it close. That's how powerful the crew is by the end. So, they would be a crazy powerful asset to acquire.

To the point of offering them the role of consort: no. I don't think he'd do it. Not right after the Crown, at least. And it's something I wish I'd made clearer in my long fic. I'd clarify it in a rewrite. Raphael never actually offers Joi/Durge the role of consort. Haarlep moves for her to be in that role. Haarlep informs Mephistopheles that she's his new consort. Meph is the first one to actually state it and does this in front of Dispater to discredit his son. Raphael then plays along with it in order to build his influence with the succubi/incubi. It's self-preservation, power, and arrogance that motivates the decision, not affection.

So uh...yeah. Sorry. I don't....I don't think he'd take Tav/Durge as his consort. Maybe after he's had his assbeat for a while? And they crusade and prove themselves to be incredibly useful?

But we lie to ourselves for fiction. Sorry for the longpost.

[life-in-the-monster-haus]

I am so so so sorry for just popping in here and bringing back bible talk because I know you got flack for it but I wanted your opinion on this.

Fontana was doing a Q&A on Instagram for September and she answered a question about why Clawdeen and Howleen weren’t related anymore:

But the leaked bible (which I don’t believe you read) said Clawdeen and Howleen were secret cousins and it would be revealed at the end of season 1, which contradicts the show and what Fontana is saying here.

I guess I just want to know what you think cause I value your opinion but I also see fans refer to the Bible leak a lot and I know you were one of the people that didn’t believe it. (You can ignore me too I kinda just stormed in here)

I'll never ignore a well thought out question or a fellow fan who wants to exchange ideas! bring them on!

No need to apologize! The thing with the show bible got quite out of hand, now that the season is over we can clearly see it was a bunch of circumstantial nonsense. I can talk about it now, enough time and fan fare has passed.

I read it and personally? it sounded like it was mostly assumptions and educated guesses based off the direction Nickolodeon / Mattel are going in matters like diversity & inclusion. Not really something that a show staff would write.

I think everyone was HOPING Clawdeen and Howleen would still be related (I was too) but honestly? after the secret dimensional crap they pulled with Clawd & then finding out her mom was still alive, the likelihood of Clawdeen having a 3rd surprise relative she wasn't aware of became more and more unlikely.

I don't really care for the cultural consultant they hired to over-see this season. While the concern of "all monsters of a certain ethnicity assuming to be related" IS a valid concern, I don't think it applies to the wolf pack. In fact I think it brings up way more and weirder questions / implications than the one they are trying to fix.

So now that we know Howleen is not related to Clawd & Clawdeen what does this mean for Howleen? is she no longer black now? they said Hexican heritage so I'm assuming Howleen is no longer black and she is now only Mexican. I take bigger issue with them erasing Howleen's blackness than encouraging this obscure & ancient stereotype that "people of the same ethnicity would all be related" or is she ALSO mexcian and black? it's POSSIBLE for 2 different interracial families to have kids in the same area / school / grade. it's just not very likely. As a mixed person myself I take issue with this... I know lots of half Puerto Ricans in my state but I'm one of three who's Puerto Rican AND Irish and none of us are in the same age range. I don't think the wolf pack encouraged any negative stereotypes because we saw other black kids and other werewolves. it's not a problem to view them all as related IF they are in fact related. There's nothing wrong with having a big family either. Harry Potter did it with the Weasley's there's 7 children in the family but no one said it was encouraging negative stereotypes about redheads.

I love G3 I really do, it's mostly done positive things for the brand and the characters we love. But every once in awhile they kinda shoot themselves in the foot while trying to avoid something they do something way, way worse. for example in this generation they're trying to "tone down" mentions of death because they said it's too depressing for modern kids and Shea has also gone on record saying that monsters like Zombies and Ghosts aren't the remnants of dead humans, they were born monsters. Which is all well and good but then they still do things that only dead creatures do - like Vampires drinking blood - the reason they do it is because their blood cannot sustain life or Zombies eating brains, why do they still need brains if they're a complete being? and where are the brains coming from? Ghoulia made an entire loaf of Whole Brain Bread in the first season of the Nickolodeon show, brains came from someone. So someone somewhere died to provide those brains and if they're not real brains they why are we calling them brains? why not just have it be pink nutrient mush!?

Because THAT would ruin Ghoulia's cool flesh eating aesthetic, no more Brain Puffs or Cup-O-Brains. (which I personally love & I hope they never stop doing this)

See the logistical nightmare that one change created!? If no one has ever died, where is all the dead stuff coming from!? Frankie is literally made out of corpses, why is that okay!? Because their donor parts died a long time ago!? What is the cut off for how long someone has to be dead before we can joke about using their body parts to create a new person!? They have Frida Kahlo's arm and Frida died 70 years ago.

Making Howleen not related to our main wolf pack did something similar. it's created a logical nightmare that I am confident Shea and her crew do not want to answer for because "it's not plot relevant" but it's relevant to us, the fans, we're the only ones who care.

I don't like it and I think their cultural consultant is needlessly walking on egg shells. I don't feel this concern was all that much of a prominent issue with Clawdeen's family during the previous generations - if anything the fans spent WAY more time denying her being black than anything else and Mattel's flat out refusal to give her natural textured hair supported this theory. But at least G3 is trying to correct this... they need to try harder though, a few braids and baby hairs aren't going to cut it I NEED Clawdeen to have some puffs, corn rows or a whole head of braids. (stop putting blonde in her hair mixture while you're at it!) I do not like that Hoween is no longer part of our wolf pack but I guess it's better than her being written out of the series completely.

Sorry I kinda went on a tangent there, but I assume these in depth thoughts are why you guys ask me these kinds of questions to begin with.

[lambcow]

My Plan for the Upcoming Twilight TV Show so that it's actually Good

I heard recently that they're doing a Twilight TV show. The rights are out there at the very least. Who knows when it will happen and what network will produce it where, but it's going to happen.

But here's my thing - they're going to do it wrong if they do it the way I think they will, which is anything like the timeline of the Books/Movies. As a hardcore Twilight fan (yes I'll admit it, I spent a long time in fandom as a preteen, okay? It was my first online fandom and the first fanfiction that I wrote) I have Opinions(TM) about how to make the show in a way that would make it interesting. Stephanie Meyer had interesting ideas and I stand by this! There's a lot of untapped potential in the series and I think if they did it right it could be a really, really cool show! But there's not much going on if we just rehash the same events of the books over again at an episodic level.

No.

I present to you, not the TV show "Twilight", but the TV show "Cullens", which starts off with Carlisle Cullen as he has come to America when he finally starts to build his Coven.

This is NOT the story of whiny Bella Swan and her falling in love with Edward and becoming a vampire over 4 books or 5 movies, but rather the story of a man who has already spent over two centuries as a vampire, struggling because of his love for humanity as he finds purpose and meaning as he builds his family. We follow his story as he collects his coven.

We truly open on the show when Carlisle finds Edward dying of Spanish Influenza and decides to turn him for humanity's sake because he would die and because he as a man is lonely and this boy is so young, only 17, and Edward's mother begs him to do whatever he can to save her son and who knows, maybe Carlisle's been watching him and he sees him like a son already too. Maybe we get flashbacks to Carlisle with the Volturi for those 20 years he stayed with them in Italy back in the early 1700s, who knows. The fact of the matter is, that Carlisle is a doctor at the hospital where Edward is, and for whatever reason that we as an audience are compelled to understand in this first and important episode is Carlisle is finally done being alone and craves family and Edward resembles that for whatever reason, so Carlisle gives in and turns him. The next several episodes are an arc about their relationship as we deal with newborn Edward. We know how hard it is to adjust to being newly turned. After he calms down, Edward then has to confront his mortality and that of his family, we see him start to remember his family and confront those memories. More flashbacks to the Volturi as Carlisle explains what being a vampire is to Edward etc.

We follow the pair then as they travel around with the cover story that Edward is Carlisle's nephew. It's three years later when Esme enters the picture. What we know already is she attempted suicide and Carlisle turned her to save her - and that they have history since Carlisle treated her for a broken leg some ten years prior when she was 16 years old. Fast forward to now and she's gone through an abusive marriage where she ran away from her husband several times, most recently after getting pregnant, and has just lost her baby due to a lung fever. At her wit's end with all of it, Carlisle finds her after she jumps off a cliff attempting to end her life. They end up falling in love and getting married after she is turned. That's several episodes I'm sure. GREAT ARC. But Esme struggles with blood lust, which is a great transition into the conversation for what happens just a few years later with Edward...

We can tie more vampire politics into the show (especially the Volturi into it) when Edward goes through his Ripper phase when he decides he doesn't want to drink animal blood like Carlisle teaches him. The two fight but what can Carlisle do? Maybe there are other vamps around as well to cause extra drama. Who knows? It is a TV show, after all. He goes off on his own and that's a whole plot. I'm sure the network could find some interesting ways to make this dramatic for a few episodes and keep enough plot points alive. Add in some new OC's and side characters. Remember the Denali clan? When do they start being formed? There's not a lot of context on them, just that they're close with The Cullen's. Maybe we get some of their story and interaction here. Maybe Sasha (the original leader who was killed by the Volturi for creating an immortal child) reaches out to Carlisle at some point near the beginning and this is when they all become vegetarian vampires together before the whole Denali clan is formed too.

Fast forward to when that arc is resolved. Edward is back with Carlisle and Esme and the peace is back. Now, we get Rosalie... Now, the thing with Carlisle, is he doesn't turn people just to turn people. He's very moralistic. We learn that all the time about his character. I'm sure our little trio has traveled on from Chicago and is in New York where they encounter Rosalie Hale who was assaulted nearly to death by her husband and all his buddies. Carlisle is somewhat of a matchmaker here and hopes Rosalie and Edward can keep each other company for their immortal lives... it makes me wonder what episode and background we can throw into the show here. Did Carlisle know this girl in any other capacity? Why are his dad senses tingling about Rosalie anyway? That's gotta be an arc.

Anyway, turns out Rosalie is not only not interested in Edward, but she's only really interested in staying with the Cullens because being alone forever would get lonely, so she stays with them... but that's after her revenge arc because Rosalie Hale is a certified Bad Ass. She goes after her Fiance and all his Dude Bros and takes them all out, and I can just imagine her executing this flawlessly as a vamp. I do wonder if Edward reads her mind about her plans and asks if he can help her, though. Eventually, she gives in and it's Sibling Bonding(TM) at its finest. It's this bonding that convinces Rosalie to stay with the Cullens after all, and that's that.

Next, we get Emmett. Now, this is a fun one! Because we get Emmett who starts pining over the gorgeous Rosalie Hale when they move to this new place. I'm not sure it says where they are, but I digress. Do we have a bit of the Bella/Edward vibes here? Are there warnings of "don't let the human close"? Is this around the time when we've just had the Denali arc and are reminded of the human child being killed? Is Carlisle having flashbacks? What is the drama? Make it interesting, TV people! Is Edward mad that Rosalie is flirting back? Is it harmless? Who. Knows. -- But then, it doesn't matter because Emmett is getting mauled by a bear in the woods and... wait, why is Rosalie even there? Why does she even find him? Hmmm, seems like she's following him around protectively ;) well- whatever the reason and drama, Emmett is near dead and she saves him and brings him to Carlisle to be turned. The reactions of the coven... the reactions of the town, of his family, of his friends, the drama. Make it interesting, once again, people! This is TV gold! It's cliches and everything you want for TV, c'mon! And then, of course, since they were already practically in love already, they really can be together, but now they have to leave because Emmett is supposedly dead and the Cullens are complicit in that for some reason too perhaps. So they get out of dodge and where do they go now?

If you guessed Forks, Washington, you're right. It's the first time and it's time to get into the legends and deal with The Wolves(TM). It's all about the Quiluetes and it's time to make a treaty with The Pack(TM). Ephraim Black is Jacob's great-grandfather and the leader of the tribe. Whoooa boy. I can think of sooooo much they can do with this,. And just how long do the Cullens stay in Forks the first time around? It's a whole arc. Maybe it's a season. We get some good wolf content. We get some pack dynamics. It's great. We get some beef between Rosalie and the wolves maybe, because there's obvious dislike between her and the wolves later and it's gotta be for a reason more than just their smell, I know it. So, several episodes there. Maybe even some fighting. I know it ends with a treaty, but that's not easily won. Maybe it's Rosalie they found first and one of the wolves attacked her before they were able to make talks for peace. Yeah. I can see this season being really fun.

So, after all that goes down, maybe there's something with the Volturi? Something with the Denali? They do end up staying with the Denali Coven for a time. Maybe they go somewhere else for a little while after they've overstayed their welcome in Forks. Sometime around the 1940s they leave. During the 1950s Jasper and Alice wander upon them and at this point, I fully believe we would get a several-episode arc of Jasper's origin story with the Civil War and the Newborn Army - but they've gotta make it interesting somehow, so there's gotta be a parallel conflict in the timeline that makes it relevant, like I keep saying, make it interesting. Who knows where the Cullens are living right now at this point, but there's crazy everywhere and they're vampires they're practically magnates for danger and chaos. Make something up. Family drama, vampire drama, whatever you need. Where are more of those OCs. And don't forget! We have all the covens and vampires from the battle in Breaking Dawn that we can draw on at ANY point in the show for extra vampires to make any of this interesting as well! Make. It. Make. Sense. How does Carlisle know everyone all the time??? Add spice, add interest, and make the Cullens well-connected in a way that makes sense!

Once we get through Jasper's origin story, we get how he and Alice met, which of course is that Alice saw him in a vision. Alice is such a fun character.

And what do they do in the interim 60 years until Bella? Um, not really sure, but we can find some filler or we can time skip. Not like we haven't been doing that anyway. I also have this vague idea that the whole first few seasons are vaguely a la How I Met Your Mother where they're always telling the story to Bella or Renesmee or someone anyway -- oooh telling the story to Ren would be cute actually... that has potential. Grandpa Cullen telling his granddaughter about how all the family got together. That's adorable, whether you like Renesmee as a character or not. Tell me I'm wrong... Anyway, so then maybe it's like, "So what about mom?" or something and we jump to the actual plot of the Twilight books.

But we don't just get the Twilight books, we get the full in-depth. We get the shifters in La Push full with Emily and Sam and Quil, Embry and Jake, and Paul and all the bois, we get the whole story from Bree Tanner on the side as that develops. We get random check-ins with the Denali clan, because that's relevant! We get Edward's perspective on things as well when he meets Bella and how he runs away to the Denali clan because he's dead lusting for her blood! We get complex feelings and all the arguments about it! We get Rosalie and Edward fighting because isn't she being hypocritical about Bella?

We get the Volturi and more drama from the throne room as they learn about the Cullens and their drama just like we have been following Volturi drama on and off all series long. We know the personalities of Caius and Marcus and their dynamic with Aro. We've already heard the origin story of Jane and Alec and we know how brutal the terror twins are. We get the Volturi women Sulpicia, Athenedora, Chelsea, Heidi, and Renata. Don't even get me started on Demitri and Felix and my headcanon of their epic friendship. So, yeah, Volturi stuff.

All of it comes to a head at the final battle in Breaking Dawn just like we know but with so much more meaning than ever before because of the rich history we have from seasons upon seasons of "The Cullens" or "Cullen" or whatever you end up calling this show. It's amazing, it's beautiful, we've laughed, we've cried, we've become a family over and over again and Carlisle has a family and this is his family and he is happy.

Will they make it like this? Probably freaking not, but this is my one request to the universe. Don't make a "Twilight" TV show. Make a "Cullen" TV show.

Please.

[acesofspadess]

Avocados...

a/n: its the big three...

summary: Louis ends up talking about his relationship with you and avocados

The news had been out for a few months now that you, Louis, Niall and Harry were in a committed relationship. And while it wasn't exactly news to your fans who had predicted it since you had all met during the One Direction days, people had opinions they felt had to be heard. You four already kept your personal lives to yourselves, but the occasional ‘my girlfriend’ or ‘my boyfriend’ would present itself in interviews or shows.

Louis was at LADbible for a day of interviews  and was currently doing a snack war.

“You know i feel really bad for saying this because i actually really fucking hate baked beans.” He looked up at the crew in front of him, seeing their faces. “I must be one of the only men in England- or only person in England that hates baked beans, yeah.” He brought the plate to his side listening to Becky, a crew member, try and give him the easiest way to eat it. 

“Go on, let me.” he flipped his eyesight to the other bowl. “And what have we got here? What's this?” he put down the fork before switching back to the beans. “I'll come to this in a sec shall? Right. Oh, i fucking hate beans, do you know what? For you lot, though, I will give it a go. Oh, H will never let me live this down.” He sprinkled some cheese on top, completely missing his mention of one of his significant others. “It must be fifteen years since I've had some beans.”

He listened to Becky explain what was in the bowls, apologizing for not explaining himself. “I don't know, they're just weird.” was his response to why he didn't like it. He took the smallest bite he could and chewed with a pained expression. “Oh, fucking awful, man. Oh that's gross, man.” he shook his head hoping that would diminish the taste from his mouth.

“Right, mac and cheese, fucking staple.” he moved onto the bowl of pasta after taking a drink to rid the taste of beans from his mouth. “Again ‘american’ right? Cause it looks Italian to me.” he took a hefty bite and relaxed in his chair. “Banging though. I had a lot of mac and cheese, or a lot of cheesy pasta, growing up as a kid. To be fair, for my little lad Freddie, my girlfriend - who is half Italian, makes him a lot of cheesy pasta, so… I'd have to go with that.”

“Is there anything else she makes for him? Or is that like the staple?” Becky asked out of pure curiosity.

“My fans are gonna hate me for this, she makes a lot of food from her Trinidad side and one thing we always have in the house is avocados, Freddie loves it when she makes them. She makes those and - i know it's not the right wording but like candied bananas. Those are really good. Actually-”

He took out his phone from his pocket and tapped a few buttons before the facetime ringing was heard. “I really hope she answers otherwise that would be-” he cocked his head with a laugh and watched as the call connected, your beautiful face popping up on the screen.

“Hey love.” a smile so big was plastered on his face as he saw you. “Hey Lou. I thought you were filming still?” your washed Trini accent was heard through the phone, confusion laced within. “I am,” he walked in a circle to show you and laughed. “I don't think you should be on your phone in the middle of an interview, Lou.”

“No I'm not. I wanted to ask you a question though.” The phone was now visible for the cameras to see and they could see you cock your head with questions. “Alright then.” 

“When you make avocados for us you make like this candied banana but i forgot what they're called and i don't want to keep saying ‘candy bananas’ like a wanker.”

Your laugh as well as others was heard and he just shook his head at you. “Its fried plantains Lou. and you can have them sweet or salty. Just like avos.” he was mesmerized with the way you spoke about things from your culture, “Thank you love.”

“Was that it?” you asked, adjusting your sunglasses as you walked out of the shade. “What are you doing and who are you with?” he asked, remembering the second laugh he heard. “I'm with Ni right now. We just went out to this little cafe before going back to the studio where H and Freddie are.” you showed him Niall who made a silly face at lou. “Alright love, I will call you when I'm done. Love you both.” 

Niall who was no longer in frame was heard shouting an ‘ i love you’ back and you giggled. “I love you Lou.”

“Give my love to H and Freddie will you?”

“Of course Lou.”

“Alright , alright, I'll see you later.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too.”

And as he went to hang up Niall's second ‘love you’ was briefly heard. “Right, fried plantains and ‘avos’ as my girlfriend says. The only way I eat them. Fucking avocados man.”

[goddessofwisdom18]

your favorite character being largely disliked by both the stans and the antis is actually so devastating. where am i supposed to go

there are three main opinions about mor in this fandom:

1. she’s fine bc she’s feyre’s bestie but you don’t really care about her personally (probably bc she’s queer because the stan girlies used to LOVE mor when moriel was semi-canon. i remember. i was there)

2. she’s fine but annoying bc she ~lead azriel on~ (main opinion on the acotar subreddit). never mind that if this was true, it would be as a result of a retcon, because again, pre acowar, moriel was going to be canon. sarah made mor sapphic because we were asking for more lgbt characters. (again. i was there.) and besides, i frankly don't think it is true, because azriel is the fucking spymaster with a million chances of knowledge at his fingertips and mor spent 80% of her time at a gay bar so idk how he couldn't have fucking known?

3. or she’s the fucking worst because she was. idk. mean to nesta. you know who else was mean??? and people love that about her because it's a result of trauma, it makes her flawed and relatable? literally nesta T_T this is not anti nesta i just don’t get it.

4. she's the fucking worst because she… supposedly lied about eris? ?? i'm not even going to begin to unpack this. why y'all IMMEDIATELY take the man's side and think what he's saying is bible… i don't fucking know. learn to decenter men in your life my friend. sometimes women ARE telling the truth even if they're basic or pick mes or whatever.

mor��s traumatized as hell and definitely has as much to back up her occasional cattiness as nesta had to back up her literal life long bullying. but few people will give her a feminist reading. few people will analyze how sarah wrote her story or what that means. few people will even give her credit as a real villain. she’s just an annoying pick-me bitch and that’s the end of it.

think about the lack of grace rhysand gives nesta. think about what that might mean for mor, to whom rhys (and his friends) was a sort of savior, because her life in the hewn city was that bad that somehow dealing with rhysand is better. that was who she grew up with; that was what she was taught to see as good because at least it wasn’t keir.

not to mention that her life is shaped around her survival via her desirability to males. ESPECIALLY as a sapphic woman can you imagine what that would do to her psyche?

but no. no fan posts about her. no headcanons. nothing nada. just me and the mor week posts and the occasional obligatory stan reference bc she's part of the main cast.

i understand being annoyed bc of the double standard in canon between her and nesta's heavy drinking, but even then i see posts all the time about "i would love rhys if it weren't for the narrative's worship of him!" and none for mor because she's just a ghost. she's nothing to anybody. despite being A MAIN CHARACTER!

not to mention but like. generally positioning yourself perpetually in opposition to the paradigm rather than just having values whether they're popular or not is not a great way to go about things. i completely understand liking eris regardless of what he's done - i am a tamlin stan despite the fact that he was very well abusive in acomaf - but the fact that there are antis out there who are so convinced mor is lying, or who want sarah to write that storyline, is so digusting to me. women in groups you don't like, political sides you don't like, women you think are annoying - they still deserved to be believed. don't give into respectability politics. come on now.

[pjsk-headcanons]

ok welcome to today's ted talk (i am procrastinating on doing my schoolwork bc brother eughhh i am not reading a book from 1500 or smth /jk i will eventually. just let me have this for now) today's ted talk is.... what teams and drivers in f1 pjsk characters would like bc f1 and pjsk is arguably what is maintaining me sane and idk why not. if you disagree uhhh thats fine idc lol this is purely based off of vibes and cardinal directions WxS - rui: as i have mentioned in my first hc he likes a) ferrari b) red bull c) mclaren, bc every f1 fan ik is at least A BIT of a ferrari fan even if they like only one team (*cough* that fan may be me *cough* *cough*), so rui is a ferrari fan and a red bull fan, probably because he likes the crazy shit on red bull's channel (look at this for example: https://youtube.com/shorts/uf9PQT0OgUY?si=yA8NM97AJHeyf0HH). maybe he likes the drink as well, now drivers! his favorite driver is lando, bc i think he will like his streaming content (perhaps his personality and his willingness to talk abt mental health and i am not kidding, search it up!!) (i'd like to note that rui is most definitely a very avid f1 fan) - tsukasa, emu and nene: they all like ferrari and red bull, they're not avid fans but they understand what happens in the sport (mainly because of rui) and as i think they wouldn't be as big fans as rui, so they probably just follow rui's opinions LOL im sorry if it's basic, but it's imo :3 L/N - ichika: she's a casual f1 fan, so she probably likes ferrari bc it's popular and she doesnt know how much depression it causes to be a tifosi. (ps: i am not a tifosi) her favorite driver is lando yet again, because she decided to learn a bit more abt the f1 drivers and found out he can play multiple instruments, so that sparked an interest in her and yeah - saki: she probably doesn't even care but she likes to listen to ichika and shiho talk abt the races. im sorry if it sounds like saki slander, i just dont think she would really like f1 😭😭 pls forgive me saki fans - honami: the ultimate of ultimate of f1 casual fans. that's it, maybe she would like alex but that's it - shiho: the less casual f1 fan out of l/n, she likes red bull and max verstappen. arguably she doesnt even care abt the f1 teams, but she likes max for how he is(me too shiho. it's actually sad to think i didnt like him </3) extra hc: ichika and shiho most definitely talk abt f1 whenever they have time to! VBS - akito: he likes whatever team is fighting an's favorite team. if she likes red bull, he likes mclaren, etc, etc. point is, he likes what an doesnt bc he has some beef with an (i promise you it's not idk levels of genuine hate it's like uhhh i forgot the word im not sure if this is clear!!) - an: uhhh i accidently explained her in akito's part - kohane: weirdly, super into f1. she's not the "i watch f1 for the drivers!" fan, she's the "i watch f1 for the sport!" fan (<- i feel like i have to clarify that) and although that may not make sense, she roots for all the teams and drivers. (even lance.) so tbh if you asked her "kohane whats your favorite f1 team and f1 driver?" she would say "idk i just like the sport i dont really care abt who's winning" - toya: he seems like he would like f1 but he doesnt know a shit abt f1(the creative juices are almost gone now afksahsjkdgbhdg) N25 - mafuyu: i feel like she heard abt f1 at school and ended up liking instead of the sport, the aerodynamics stuff. very specific ik - kanade: she would get distracted by the f1 sounds so she wouldn't even know what's happening and somehow compose a music based off the sounds of an f1 car/f1 related - mizuki: she heard abt f1 one day from rui and ever since she talks with rui abt f1 stuff (other than the in canon stuff)!! her favorite team is whoever is cooking at the moment (she doesnt want to suffer over like. omg bad strategies and bad car) and her favorite driver is lewis (1. his fashion style 2. how good he is) - ena: tbqh the same thing as an's

MMJ - my creative juices have almost completely dried. but tbh, i dont think they would have time for f1 bc they do so much shit yknow, ik they like have managers and everything but id argue they're dedicated to what they do and they'd prefer to do other stuff than learn abt f1 stuff. im so sorry mmj fans i promise ill make a better headcanon than this one day 😭😭

oops how did it get this long? anyways, thank you for joining my ted talk! hope everyone is ok :D - papaya anon

.

[nerdyvocals]

Hello again! To be honest, @look-at-those-niceass-rocks and I weren't originally sure if we were going to watch Rise of Red or not, but I saw some. Interesting things on tiktok, and we decided this would be a fun excuse to get tipsy on a Saturday night (we even made themed cocktails!), and that we would have a lot of unhinged things to say. Previously, we've also watched and kept a running commentary of the first three films and the Royal Wedding short film.

That said, I know opinions on this film have been very divided, and if you're looking for high praise, you will not find it here. The movie was cute, and we had fun, but we did not have a lot of compliments, and we're still messaging each other with criticisms a week later. If you're looking for two dumbasses who give tipsy critiques (please drink responsibly) about children's movies, please, proceed under the cut!

First, an honorable mention from a few days before the watch party: Bee (after we mentioned that we both, despite not originally planning on watching Rise of Red, had avoided spoilers just in case we changed our minds): Why do I care about spoilers for an unasked-for fourth movie in a franchise I only just became interested in?

Me (reading the description): Okay, so it looks like it's Back to the Future but Disney Bee: Great! Me: Was this needed? I feel like the trilogy wrapped things up nicely

Uma: This is Auradon, the kingdom where all your favorite fairytales are true. It was formed 30 years ago when- Me: PAUSE, okay so of the few things I've seen on tiktok,

Uma: Guess who they left in charge while they're gone? Me: That seems like a bad plan Bee: I was about to say

Me: So the biggest complaint I've seen so far has been about this, where Uma says that Auradon was founded 30 years ago Bee: Right Me: I've seen people call it a plot hole because in the first movie, Mal says the kingdom was founded 20 years ago, and I don't think they ever say exactly how much time passes between any of the movies, but the reality is, and I'm gonna touch your hand when I say this, Bee: *cackling* Me: The first movie came out in 2015. It is now 2024. The first movie came out almost 10 years ago, and in fact, when you add 10 to 20, ya get 30. Bee: *still wheezing* Me: Now, I don't know if the complaints are coming from new, younger fans who just recently binged the original trilogy in preparation for this and didn't realize when the first one came out, or if they're from older fans who have lost track of time and don't want to face the math- Bee: Fuck math, man!

(Continuing from the previous conversation, after discussing character ages and determining that Uma is likely between 26-28 at this point) Bee: That's too young to be headmaster, she's a baby Me: Bee, that's fairly close to 30, that's not unreasonable. I feel ya though, I'm not an adult, I'm a baby with a drinking permit. Bee: I think I've finally surpassed baby with a drinking permit, I'm more like. Adult, reluctantly

Fairy Godmother: The queen of Hearts refused to join Auradon when we united Me: Yeah, because you would've imprisoned her???

Blonde Wonderland Guard: *appears* Me: Lucius Malfoy??? Bee: Wig Me: Starkid's A Very Potter Sequel Lucius Malfoy???

Me: Does she (Red) have a nose ring??? Bee: Oh shit, she does! Me: We finally get some edginess to character design and it's when nose rings are no longer edgy

Honorable mention: Us spending Multiple Minutes trying to figure out if Maddox was supposed to be The Mad Hatter or the son of the Mad Hatter. We ended with no answers

(About Paolo!Charming) Bee: Oh, he has only gotten hotter Me: Correct! Why does he have blue in his hair Bee: Because he's hot

Me: Imagine being this in love still after raising Chad

Cindy: We wouldn't have been able to make this great family Bee: And Chad

Cindy: *presents Chloe with the Most Hideous Shoes I have Ever Seen* Me: *chugs what's left of my drink*

Cindy: We can visit Chad at college another time Me: Chad got into college??? Bee: Nepo baby

Bee: Does anyone in this movie understand "show don't tell?" Movie: *Insert Love Ain't It, aka Exposition: the Song* Me: Nope!

Cindy and the Queen of Hearts: *share a look* Me: Ex-lovers Red and Chloe: *share a look* Me: Future lovers?

Me: JABBERWOCKY MENTION! Bee: Drink!

Me: Is that supposed to be Jasmine and Aladdin? Bee: I think so? Me: Why does Jasmine have a fuck-ass bob? What is it with Descendants and fuck-ass bobs???

Me: I'm going to get so drunk over this Bee: I think that's safet Me: ...Safet???

Me: Where are Harry and Gil? Bee: On their honeymoon

(During the What's My Name? reprise) Bee: ...I need to take another drink Me: Same Bee: My drink is almost gone, I'm so sad Me: Do what I did, make another Bee: I will after this dork-ass song

Uma: Do you mind? Queen: I think I do Me: *pausing* Do you want to make a second drink real quick before things get cringier? Bee: ...I think that's a good idea

Me: I think I don't hate the silhouette of the Queen of Hearts' look, but it's way too monochromatic Bee: Drink! You're right though, there's no dimension

*Wand Breaks* Me: OH SHIT Bee: You could do that this whole time???

Cindy: Stop it, Bridget, you're better than this! Me: Is she? Bee: I don't think she is

Aladdin: Look at her, she's enjoying this! Me: Yeah, she's a teenager experiencing parental affection for the first time. Y'all really learned nothing, huh? Bee: You'd think after ten years they'd get their shit together

(As Cinderella is being led away) Bee: I love her poofs Me: God, me too, I love puff sleeves Bee: We are both just Anne Shirley

Fairy Godmother: *is young* Me. She looks so much like Jane Bee: For a second there, I thought that just straight up was Jane Me: Brilliant casting

Me: Why are their clothes so modern if this is supposed to be over thirty years ago

Me: This princess insult doesn't work if you're both princesses

Red and Chloe: *forehead touch* Me: Gay Bee: Kiss

(After Fight of Our Lives) Bee: I feel like this didn't need to be a song Me: We could've just had a homoerotic sword fight à la The Princess Bride

Me: Ahhh, that's why everyone is dressed so modern, so they can blend in without a costume change! That's so lazy!

Bee: He (Merlin) pulls a lit Molotov cocktail from his bag

(Alchemy Class) Bee: ...The hap is fuckening

Red: *eats a cupcake* Bee: These falsies are really gonna help me do alchemy!!!

Bridget: It's Jasmine and Aladdin! J&A: Call us Jaladdin! Me: I will not be doing that Bee: *choking* WHAT THE FUCK

Morgie: Son of Morgana! Me: See, Morgana has a kid already, but gee, why wouldn't Disney want children Googling Mordred? Bee: Hehehe

Uliana: TELL BRIDGET I WILL DESTROY HER Me: See, girl, she did warn you Bee: Why are Jaladdin going with?

Ella: Will you go to castlecoming with me? Me: OH Bee: GAY Me: So it wasn't a prank that turned her evil, it was that her girlfriend ditched her for a boy, Us, simultaneously: IT'S GIVING GOOD LUCK BABE

(In the Tremaine Manor) Me: Oooh, this kid is about to learn what parental abuse is

Bee: I need them to try and fix it and then have to go back again because they accidentally turn Cinderella evil Me: That's what the fifth movie is about, actually

Uliana's Hideout: *emerging from the water* Me: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT Bee: "Can-I-Have-A-Cigarette" lookin' ass Me: *WHEEZE*

(During Perfect Revenge) Bee: Kenny Ortega, I'm sorry I didn't appreciate you when I had you

(It was at this point, when Uliana was hanging by her tentacles, that Bee's husband entered to check on us) [Husband]: ...What in the Doc Ock

Me: Ooooh, that last sip hit, I think I've made it to drunk Bee: Oh boy! Me: I'm so glad I don;t have to be anywhere tomorrow Bee: Drink some water Me: Water is for weaklings! Bee: I don't get hangovers anymore because I hydrate while I drink Me: I don't get hangovers because I'm 22 Bee: Suck my dick, Levi Me: I don't think [Husband] would appreciate that Bee: [HUSBAND], CAN LEVI SUCK MY DICK?! [Husband], distantly: I don't know how to respond to that??? Me: *falling off the couch crying laughing*

Bridget: *talking about her Shuffle of Love dance* Me: If not going on date, why worried about love, I am drunk Bee: No, you're correct

Bridget: If I was your mom, I'd love to have a daughter that thinks for herself Me: BOY WOW I WAS NOT EXPECTING TO GET HIT IN THE MOMMY ISSUES

Bee: Oh, pretty boy (Paolo!Charming) is back! Also I stood up and I too am now drunk

(After some line about valiant knights being always good) Me: Have you heard of Lancelot? Bee: I was about to say

(During the Hands Dirty sequence) Me: This is a song from a better movie Bee: Not again

Bee: I simply do not believe that Cinderella would let her daughter grow up that dumb as hell. I do, however, believe that Prince Charming would let his daughter grow up that dumb as hell Me: have you met Chad? Bee: That's fair, actually. Chad's adopted Me: Who's goddamn white baby is that? Bee: Who's goddamn white baby is that!

Me: Pause! So here, funnily enough, is a perfect example of what my mentor calls "Disney Patches:"

Bee: Drink! Me: So what they're trying to do here is show that Ella has to wear her clothes to the bone and patches them herself. When you add patches to garments to make them look like they've been repaired, you need to make sure the placement makes sense, as in think about where clothes would likely wear to holes: for pants, that's gonna be mainly knees and inner thigh. Disney has a habit of just putting patches wherever in places they just wouldn't be, like here. Why does she have patches in random places on her leg? Bee: Ohhh Me: In some cases in can be a stylistic choice, but I would argue that Ella wouldn't be the type to waste that much fabric for no reason. I can forgive the pockets though, I've had pants that got holes in the pockets, and sometimes it's easier to replace them than to patch

(A shot of Headmaster Merlin's Door) Bee: Hmmm, Merlin Me: ...Headmaster Merlin Bee: hmmmmmmmm, Merlin

Bee, completely deadpan: Hoot hoot, motherfuckers

Me: The Night Falls scene fell flat on its face so this scene could feebly crawl

Me: It has only just occurred to me that Chloe's shoes were supposed to be glass this whole time, I thought they were just fucky Doc Martens Bee: Yeah! Put the uh. The ug. Put the ugly in uggs Me: I think you need to drink more water Bee: I think you're right

Me: They're red and blue gays Bee: They're red and blue gays!

Me: Fuck whatever this movie is supposed to be about, I need them to kiss

Bee: Obsessed with his (Merlin's) coat, costume department popped the fuck off with that Me: That's my line Bee: Drink bitch!

Me: Wait, is that the end? Bee: It can't be, there's no way that worked Me: There's only ten minutes left???

Uma: You didn't think that was the end of the story, did you? Me: FUCK OFF

Bee: I am deadass on Reddit Me: *dying* Bee: Trying to figure out what the fuck

Bee: Where was the climax??? Was it supposed to be that thing in Merlin's office? Me: It can't have been Bee: If it was it fell so flat. I feel like I've sobered up watching that