#anyway i usually have a funny little tangent to go off on in these tags but nothing much about the spiral

[lollytea]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Mar tagged me in this. Thank you Mar <333

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

22

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

358,837

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Owls....for now and the foreseeable future. Other things in the past but....owls. Owls and nothing else.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

There's Sunshine in Your Smile

Atlas and the Avid Reader

A Little Change

An Exercise in Understanding

Girl Talk

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I don't, I'm sorry!! When I first started posting on ao3, I answered every comment I got, but as more came in, I realized I was running out of ways to respond and it felt like I was just copy and pasting "thank you so much omg!!!" again and again and it felt awkward and disingenuous. (I meant it tho!! I did!!)

Also I never have any idea how to respond to long essay type comments that were picking the fic apart and highlighting everything they like about it. I ADORE those comments!!! They make me happier than anything else on earth but HOW can I respond to them?? A one liner thanks feels cheap and meaningless, but a long ramble about my own stuff feels arrogant.

So I just stopped replying to comments altogether. But listen please listen!!! I do read them!!! I read every single one of them and I love and appreciate them with all my heart!!! Thank you so so SO much to anybody who's ever left a comment on anything I've written!!!

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't really write angsty endings. I guess atlas and pages both ended on a bit of a bittersweet note? Maybe.

That one ducktales fic Fearless left off on a kinda angsty cliffhanger, only because I never finished it. So it's technically an ending

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Man I dunno most of them are kinda open ended (or unfinished) I suppose A Little Change ended on a sickeningly sweet note. Like disgustingly sweet (because I was 19 and stupid and had no concept of subtlety) Penniless Promises ended with a marriage proposal.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No the only hate comment I've ever gotten is this one

It kinda annoys me. I consider your first hate comment to be a special milestone in your fanfic writing history. I've been waiting years for this. And then I FINALLY get it but I have no fucking idea what it means.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I've written bits and pieces over the years but I don't post any of it. I think the last "smut" I posted was weird werewolf knotting shit in like 2017

What kind? Fuckin uhhhhh. It's always very fluffy. Usually there's nothing weird going on. Sometimes there's monsters involved but the monsters are usually massive sweethearts who just want love.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes. A few times. And it's always fucking wattpad. At one point, somebody put my fic through Google translate and reposted it in Spanish. I would have been completely unaware if somebody hadn't messaged me about it.

The process of getting them to take it down was a fucking circus. Their ability to use Google translate suddenly vanished the moment I contacted them.

I reported it and had to go back and forth with Wattpad support because the fic was IN SPANISH, so they just kinda glanced at it and were like "This is not the same thing that you wrote. These are different words. Spanish words." I was losing my MIND!!!!!!

They took it down eventually. Anyway...sorry I went on a tangent, I just think this is a funny story. Moral of the story is there are probably several stolen fics on wattpad and run through translators, and we have no idea. There might be more of mine on there but honestly I do not have the energy to be monitoring the stupid site. I hate wattpad so much its unreal.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

As we have just learned from the above story, yes :D!!

But also yeah, some people asked permission to translate my stuff and post it with credit. Sunshine has been translated into Spanish and Ukrainian!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No I can barely manage to write them myself

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Undocumented Events of March 23rd. I might update it at some point in the next five years. But I had so many chapters planned that it will probably never reach the ending at the pace I'm going with it. But I love the jungle book husbands. I get back to them at some point in time

16. What are your writing strengths?

Word disease is the worst fucking thing ever but it CAN be a good thing in some circumstances. A huge meaty chunk of a fic. Something to dig into. Having a lot to say can lead to a lot to write. And the more you write, the more likely you'll get some quality stuff in there.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I repeat. Word disease is the worst fucking thing ever. And when it's coupled with a complexity addiction, UGGH!!! It's a blight on my life. I can't just write a simple straightforward fic, without getting carried away and the ideas just get bigger and bigger. Suddenly I'm implementing more elaborate concepts, scenes that need to be handled delicately. Everything takes absolutely all of my brainpower because I'm a neurotic overthinker who can never just RELAX and write something fun. And I WANT all of it. I want to execute all the plans that exist in my head but then I get overwhelmed by how big and complicated everything has gotten and I get burned out. Which is why things so rarely get done.

I'm a perfectionist. A horrible terrible one. I struggle to write ANYTHING without carefully constructing every individual line of it. Which makes progress so slow and tedious. I get scared to even START fics because I'm afraid I'll make myself feel awful again if they don't turn out good.

My grammar is very imperfect but I'm working on that.

I can be very unnecessarily wordy and take forever to get to the point. I've reread my own stuff and even I have difficulty following it because the sentences just have so many bells and whistles for no good reason. I completely forget a huge chunk of vocab and don't realize they are simpler way to phrase things.

My attempts at executing believable emotional scenes often fall kinda flat. Writing drama is hard but I'm amazed by some people's capability to master it so I'm chipping away at it, hoping to get better.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't really have any thoughts at all about them. Literally none.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I'd like to say it was Trolls but it was actually Hetalia when I was like 14. But I do everything within my power to distance myself from Hetalia, so I like to say it doesn't count. But....need to be honest.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Currently, at this point that I am at, the ones I used to be the most proud of now feel like they were a waste of time. I'm sure that will change again in a few months. How I feel about my own stuff is never consistent. The way that this question is phrased implies a forever favourite. Something I loved then, I love now and will love in future, and that is just never the case.

But also I don't wanna be an Eeyore about it, so I'll say a trance, a dance, a romance perchance?

I really do love my fairy Willow. She's so special to me :D!!

Tagging: after writing this whole post, I now feel very weird tagging people specifically and being like "HEY YOU! Look at this post I made <33" This is like a don't look at me post. BUT I do have lots of writer mutuals. And writer followers. If you're one of them and you see this....you!!!! Tag youre it!!!!

[seveneyesoup]

microdosing on being an avatar of the spiral by forcing people to listen to the mouth albums

[recurring-polynya]

Fic Writer Review -tag game

Ah, this looks like fun, I love statistics! Thanks to @jkrobertson​ for the tag!!

1. How many fics on AO3?

35, although 1 is a less-explicit version of another, and two of them are anthology fics of short fiction.

2. Total AO3 word count?

675,354 over two and a half years. I am very proud of this number!!

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Everything on ao3 is Bleach. I’ve written in both the X-Men and Batfamily fandoms, but that was decades ago. Oh! and Star Wars. I had one absolutely wild summer of Phantom Menace Obidala Fanfic.

4. Top Five by Kudos?

a little in love now and then (302)

The Letter of the Law (215)

Between Tides (195)

Call Me Back When the War is Over (189)

Squad Six is Jerks and other Stories, vol I (175)

5. Do you respond to comments, why/why not?

Yes, I try to respond to all of them, even though it takes me a while sometimes. I feel like if people take the time to comment then it’s the polite thing to do to respond. I do have a couple of readers whom I love who write really thoughtful and funny comments and sometimes we end up riffing, and I have definitely ended up incorporating those ideas into other fics.

I do not usually respond to review on ff.net because their interface is and you basically have to PM the person. I get very few comments on ff.net and they are generally very short anyway.

6. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don’t really write very much angst and even when I do, it usually ends on a hopeful note. Uh, maybe  Dear Wormwood ?

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

No.

8. Have you received hate on a fic?

Nope, never. People are generally very kind to me! Even times I’ve done stuff that people didn’t like, people are very polite about it. I’m actually kind of amazed about it myself.

9. Do you write smut?

Unfortunately.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

11. Ever had a fic translated?

Someone offered to translate one of my fics once, but I never got any follow-up on it. @sakizar made a podfic of Not Broken, Just Bent, that’s sort of like a translation!

12. Ever co-written a fic before?

Nope! I used to write a lot of shared universe fic with my sister and some other friends, but that was in a different lifetime. I wrote the dialogue for a @kaicko comic once, that was a lot of fun!

13. All-time favourite ship?

Renruki, no contest

14. What's a WIP you want to finish, but don't think you ever will?

I am nothing if not a closer. If I want to finish a thing, I finish it. I do sometimes relegate a WIP to the DOA pile, but it’s usually because I’ve lost interest in it. I did get overcome with a wave of anxiety today about whether or not I will ever finish The Heart is a Muscle as a series, because each part gets harder to write than the last and there is a time gap in there that I don’t have any ideas for (yet). I am confident that I will finish the next part, though, at least.

15. What are your writing strengths?

Banter. World-building. Putting in a lot of little interconnected details and themes. Balancing large casts. Complex and layered relationships between different characters. Characters who genuinely care about each other and who do their best, even if they screw up some times. Descriptions of food you will want to eat.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

I don’t edit myself and sometimes I go off on gonzo tangents that don’t advance the plot. Making characters I like too perfect. I am not good at thinking up plots and plot trajectories and I get very stressed out about it. Perpetually biting off more than I can chew and then forcing myself to choke it down anyway.

17. What are your thoughts of writing dialogue in other languages?

I don’t know about dialogue, per se, but I’ll talk about other languages generally. The main reason it took me so long to get into writing Bleach fiction is that I was very intimidated by the idea of disrespectfully screwing up Japanese cultural stuff. Eventually, I just decided to Do My Best and try to do research and listen a lot and apologize if anyone ever called me on my mistakes As far as I know, I haven’t offended anyone.

I do not generally use honorifics, because a) there are a lot of subtleties and I felt like it was more responsible to avoid them altogether, and b) my writing style has a very American cadence and it didn’t seem to fit very well. I do use them sometimes, usually in short stuff, if it feels right.

I generally use Japanese words for the names of things that are inherently Japanese, like articles of clothing, foods, etc, and also for attack names and kidou and stuff like that. Sometimes, I will go back and forth between Japanese terms and English synonyms only for the sake of word variety (zanpakutou vs sword for example).

18. First fandom you wrote for?

I think it might actually be Batman: the Animated Series, except that it was written in a notebook and the “fandom” who saw it was “my sister.” The first online fandom I was involved in was X-Men comics in the 90′s.

19. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Probably Call Me Back When the War is Over , although I think my *best* fanfic is Hold On, Hold On

Tagging: Gosh, I dunno? @zabiume and @gizkasparadise and @thegreenfaery but only if you want to

[whatiswhump]

continuing the possessive doctor tangent bc it's tasty: what might make them latch onto a patient in the first place

@whump-it (happy to tag anyone else who requests it)

Good question, I think a doctor who might usually be impassive and treat patients normally would see a combination of things in the whumpee that would entice him. Here’s a list of conditions:

-Solitary, little to no close friends or family looking out for whumpee

-Intelligent and generally independent before finding themselves involuntarily committed, thus putting a normally respected person in an inverse power dynamic which could be enticing to the doctor

-Well respected in their academic career before being committed, in which the doctor is interested in, giving the doctor a captive audience to discuss his interests with

-A personality that while civil and pre inclined to behave and cooperate also is independent enough to push back, enticing the doctor to want to try to reign in poor behavior

-Someone that is accused of a terrible crime and that the doctor can analyze and investigate to understand whether it is true or not

Here is a little drabble: 

“Whumpee? Whumpee? Are you listening?”

He was tugged out of his drug-ridden stupor to look up at the doctor’s expectant expression. How long had he been sitting here?

“Anyway, as I was saying, I’m afraid it’s imperative that we complete these forms in your first few days here. It helps with diagnosing but also setting a baseline for future improvement. I recognize that you must be feeling off your game at the moment, the night nurse was clearly a bit too liberal with your sedative, but it is only to help ease your transition. It helps in lessening any distress or anxieties so it is all a bit less daunting.”

The man in the white coat looked, by all means, normal, like the kind of guy who coached his soccer team in middle school. Clean-shaven with laugh lines and a funny little tie clip that he wasn’t sure how to categorize, art deco perhaps?

He seemed reasonable, perhaps Whumpee could explain to him that this was all wrong, that he shouldn’t be here.

Perhaps he had a chance.

In the time that Whumpee had been staring at the man sitting across from him, he hadn’t noticed that the speaking had stopped. Was he waiting for a response?

“Um- yeah, I’m sorry, I’m having a bit of trouble following.” Whumpee offered.

“Must be unusual for you, I read online that you have quite a few degrees, you seem like quite the intelligent person?”

The question was odd but the tone was innocent so Whumpee dismissed it other than adding, “Yeah not normal.”

“You know, I am also interested in Italian and Flemish literature.”

The man had looked him up just like it said, it wasn’t that hard. It only seems logical that he would... it shouldn’t be off-putting.

“Uh, yeah I did a thesis on Dante.” He wouldn’t mind discussing it but it hardly seemed relevant as his mind was more focused on proving himself as innocent.

A spark glinted in the doctor’s eye, “I have a soft spot for the Divine Comedy, particularly L’Inferno.”

Whumpee could only clear his throat and nod slightly, something had made his mouth go dry.

“But anyway, like I said, we can work on the dosages and later whatever we prescribe to treat your symptoms until it strikes a good balance.” The doctor smiled reassuringly and then looked back down at his clipboard.

It seemed logical enough to the whumpee, although he certainly hoped he wouldn’t need a prescription, “Well I- I’d read that my symptoms could be managed with therapy.”

The doctor looked back up at Whumpee slowly, “Time will tell, but that will be up to me. For now, let’s continue with the forms shall we?”

Whumpee was unaccustomed to being on the receiving end of authority but he swallowed an urge to talk back and nodded. This man was meant to help him after all.

“Alright, let’s see, any history of mental illness in your family?”

“Um, no. Well not that I’m aware of. I was adopted, I didn’t really know my birth family.”

“So then it was your adopted family that contacted the police in regards to the- crime?”

“I didn-, um no. It was a coworker.”

“Hm. Are you in contact with them?”

“No, I haven’t seen them since I turned 18.”

Once again, the doctor looked up at Whumpee curiously. It made him a little uncomfortable and he shifted in his seat.

“Any close friends then?”

This was beginning to sting a little, “Um, no, not really anymore.” He was going to talk about her, she was no longer relevant.

This time the doctor shifted and crossed his legs, what had been a pleasant expression now bordered on an expression of enthusiasm. Why was it so offputting?

“So anyone you are particularly close with? Someone you would like me to update on your treatment or to be added to a visitation list?”

He thought he would be able to reasonably explain to this man that he was innocent, but all of these questions were not setting the right kind of stage to do such. He tried to hold back a grimace as he briefly shook his head no.

“Okay, well enough basic information for now. Shall we go ahead and discuss why you are here for treatment?”

Despite the calming sedatives, a pit began to form in his stomach.

“Would you like to talk me through it?” the doctor prompted again after a moment of silence.

Whumpee’s ears began to ring faintly, “I didn’t do it.”

The doctor’s eyebrow arched slightly but he didn’t lose his pleasant expression, “The police might not agree with that.”

“Listen, I know I am not well. But I didn’t do what they say I did.”

The doctor didn’t respond but instead seemed to leave the air around them hanging empty as he just sat there and watched Whumpee.

“I am telling the truth. I could never murder someone.” Whumpee felt his shirt getting damp, was he sweating?

The doctor adjusted his glasses and crossed his legs again and easily responded, “Yes, I believe you.”

“Seriously?” Whumpee felt a surge of relief. If he believed him there was still hope!

“Hm, yes, well, I believe that you do not believe you could. Whether you or your illness did it is another question. I have many patients that if healthy and thinking logically could never do what they have done to end up here.”

Just like that, the weak flame of hope was snuffed. The doctor couldn’t see past the accusations either. Why should he?

He studied Whumpee a little longer, making him resist the urge to squirm in his seat before saying, “Whumpee, I can see you’re disappointed, but you will be fine. I am confident that you will be cooperative in your treatment here, I can tell you want to get better. That is a great start. I can already tell we will get along very well and together, I can help you get through this.”

What had been well-worn laugh lines transformed into what Whumpee saw as a sickening smile. The doctor now looked downright giddy.

Which begged the question, what was he so excited about?

[hocenimlatine]

The Summer of ‘86

Tumblr really deleted this story and I had to reupload it. Writing really helps me stay relaxed, especially during school. So I decided to write one story a month to just keep me calm/sane.

Steve Harrington x Reader

“You know when I signed up for this job I expected to just, you know.” Steve threw his hands up. “Smile, speak to girls, do nothing, not keep greasy, hormonal pre-teens from getting grabby with this!”

He hit the life-size cut out of Kelly Le Brok from Weird Science . Robin laughed at her best friend and his hapless dilemma.

“You act like you’re the only one!” She exclaimed. Although it took some time getting used to, finding someone who could relate to his girl problems did help him get through this dry love spell. It was also nice to have someone keep him in reality from time to time. “Dingus?”

Robin pointed to a boy who was feeling up the cardboard’s leg. He rolled his eyes in annoyance.

“It’s not real, please jus-just stop it!” He shouted and the boy went running.

Steve dragged his feet to the counter and placed his chin on his fist. “This is going to be the most boring summer ever.” He mumbled.

The bell atop the door rang out signaling there was an incoming customer. Robin poked Steve and he turned around.

“HENDERSON!”

Robin watched as the two do their dorky handshake caused a big scene. When they were finished Dustin shot her a ‘hey’.

“Hey, no camp this summer?” She asked.

“Nope, Suzie going away with her family and it wouldn’t be the same without her.”

“How’s Suzie anyway, any new songs?” Steve teased his friend. “Oh! Do the Small Wonder one!”

He began to hum the tune as Dustin let him mock.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, alright very funny but without us, everyone’s ass would be grass.”

“He has a point.” Robin shrugged as she put some tapes into the rewind bin.

The bell went off again, accompanied by a very loud: “HELLO NERDS!”

Erica Sinclair busted through the doors walked in with her pin-cladded denim vest.

“Hey, Erica!”

The two older teens greeted her first as she went to stand toe to toe with Dustin.

“Well, if it isn’t the biggest nerd of them all. How’s your little girlfriend?” Dustin chuckled because this was her being nice.

“She’s good. Are you excited for the My Little Pony movie, baby Erica?”

He baby-talked the last two words. She shot him daggers preparing to go off on him until her name was being called.

“Erica?”

Dustin, Robin, and Steve turned to the door with jaws dropped.

“Coming Y/N!” Erica answered sweetly before skipping over.

“Y/N...Holy shit,” Dustin whispered.

“W-Who is that?” Steve rushed to Dustin’s side.

“It’s Lucas’ older cousin Y/N from Detroit. Is it possible for anyone to get hotter in less than a year?” Dustin whistled.

Steve was confused; she had been here before? How could he miss someone as beautiful as you?

“Ok...so she’s been here before and I’m just finding out?” Robin asked.

“She usually is only here for the holidays,” Dustin said breathlessly as a smile graced your face.

You were beautiful with coffee skin that shone like diamonds underneath the industrial Family Video Store lights; your long tone legs crawled up and hid underneath your baggy knee-length denim shorts while just above it was a sliver of skin that peeked from beneath the hot pink crop top you wore. Steve didn’t even know he was in a daze until Robin was knocking his arm from up under him. Haphazardly he gained his balance just in time as you and Erica got to the counter.

“Hey, Y/N,”

Dustin propped up against the corner earning an eye roll from Erica.

“Hey, Dustin, I didn’t see you when I first came in, how are you?”

You hugged him and he stealthily inhaled the faint scent of Love’s Baby Soft.

“I’m good, good to see you, Lucas didn’t tell me you were coming for the summer.”

“Yeah, it was last minute.” Y/N said very quickly.

“Anyways!”

Erica interrupted putting the tape and some candy on the counter.

Robin saw how lovestruck Steve was and decided to push him in the right direction.

“Steve, can you do this? I have to put some tapes back.”

Steve shook his head no, Robin shook her head yes. Steve’s eyes pleaded to not leave him while hers held a mischievous glint before leaving him be.

“Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure,” He repeated as he rung up the candy not even noticing the nervous look on Dustin, Erica, and your face. He picked up the tape to read the title when his heart pounded because this was clearly a sign.

“BACK TO THE FUTURE!” He yelled causing them to jump.

“I love this movie, it’s my favorite movie!” Steve exclaimed.

“Hers too! But can you get back to doing your job so we can go, weirdo?”

But Erica’s words fell on deaf ears as Steve continued to go off on a tangent.

“Oh, and I like the part when the mom is like ‘Oh, well your name must be Calvin Klein it’s on your underwear’.”

Y/N giggled at his animated voice. After what seemed like forever to Erica, Steve was giving them their stuff.

“I hope you enjoy the movie as much as when you first saw the movie back in the past. OH!”

He laughed at his little joke while Dustin just cringed at the exchange. The girls began to walk away when Steve called out: “I’ll be here if you need another movie!”

“Alright thanks, Steve.” Y/N waved goodbye for they disappeared.

His mouth dropped and heart stopped as his name left your lips. Robin came back to see him frozen in shock.

“What happened to him?” She asked Dustin who waved his hand in Steve’s face.

“He must be in complete shock from embarrassing himself.”

“Was it that bad?” Robin asked.

“Cringeworthy,” Dustin replied.

“She knows my name,” Steve whispered.

“What?”

“She knows my name.”

He said a little louder. Dustin didn’t want to burst his bubble but, “Yeah, it’s on your name tag.” He pointed out.

But that didn’t matter to Steve, you like Back to the Future and looked to find out his name; he knew the summer of ‘86 was going to be great.

[dcarhcarts]

This.....is the 1000th post on this blog, and I definitely waited until that could be true to post it, and that’s honestly? Very fitting. Seriously, you guys are a m a z i n g and I have literally never done a milestone before so I can’t tell you what it’s supposed to look like?? But we’ve somehow Miraculously (tm) managed to reach 100 followers and - anyway, this is going to be me very unprofessionally gushing about everyone because....I love you all and you’re all amazing aaaaaa. I’m??? Literally so blessed to have made friends and write with all of you. Y’all with multiple blogs, I’m only tagging once so I don’t spam your feed ok? And - as usual, this is going to get Long, because everything I do gets Long apparently. I tried to do it chronologically but IDK how well it worked oops.

THE LOVES OF MY LIFE, THE SUN IN MY EYES, MY MOON AND STARS

@ccrrupticn  / D!!!! you are?? literally the reason I made this blog?? Without you, this thing would n o t mcfreaking exist omg!! You’re such an amazing writer (seriously, you manage so many muses and you give them all such distinct voices??? witchcraft???) and also so ???ridiculously kind! I love gushing to you about our Kids and you’re honestly A Saint (tm) for dealing with all of my blog construction/life related breakdowns, my crazy crossover headcanons and crashing into your inbox rambling about musicals <3 I miss talking to you so hmu whenever you come back if you want!!

@personnages /  Lynna!! You’re like an Actual Angel. I think you were the first person!! who talked to me??  And You were So Nice and Welcoming that you literally soothed half of my fears coming into rpc like immediately?? You basically helped me figure out how diminutives work and you’re responsible for me adding at least 3 of my muses and I cannot tell you how much I love you and every time you pop onto my dash/feed/discord/etc, it just makes me happy inside <3 Definitely 100000% will follow you to every blog (if you’ll have me lmao) regardless of fandom!! i’m super excited about all of our ship/friendship roulettes and you’re just an absolute joy to talk to.

@nikolacvnas / LYDIA goodness you are a W O N D E R. Probably the best? Historically based blog I’ve ever encountered, and definitely one of my favorite parts of the Anastasia rpc!! The care and research and attention to detail that goes into your portrayals are a s t o n i s h i n g? Your Tatya is divine, your Maria is So Lovely and I Cry For Joy that you write Dima honestly. I’d been eyeing your blog for a little bit before I made my own - and I was honestly a little scared of you when we started cause you are a GODDESS and I am a potato, but then we talked??? and you’re hilarious and a ridiculously kind person and I love you? And of course, I love your dog (the cutest in the universe).

@mythostold / LESLIE~  Different blog, same story~ Man, I’ve been following you since maybe day two of this blog being active? No matter which fandom you end up in and which muse you write, you have such!! good!!! takes!!! For one, I love reading your meta posts??? Like you’re just so incredibly passionate about your muses?? And your writing style is so good aaaaaaa it’s so atmospheric. And on top of all of that - you’re??? such a sweet and incredible??? person??? And I love talking to you boo <3 

@lifeawoke  /  NAT BBYSWEET <3 <3 <3  I have told the story of how I did a victory dance when you followed me to d e a t h probably but it’s t r u e your writing is amazing and your blog is amazing and y o u are amazing! You are the Natasha to my Sonya, and literally every time you send me a musing I’m like immediate-goofy-grin-heart-eyes???? It’s honestly a crime we don’t have more threads but like you’re an absolute joy to talk to and meme with and I adore you/your portrayal of beautiful bratty Natasha even if she drives my Sonya up the wall <3 You are Definitely the Funny Mutual lololol I crack up so much talking to you <3

@valianceearned / CARP you’re an amazing person/writer and holy h e c k am I impressed by your OCs!! They’re all so well thought out and developed? Your bios are so detailed and so much love and care is put into all of your characters. And your writing is so Lovely and it’s also very aesthetically lovely like holy heck the amount of work you put into both the content and the formatting? I am agog, I am aghast!! 

@gearsandlevers / Callie!!!!! YOU ROUND ALL THE CORNERS I STRAIGHTEN THE CURVES!! love your kids so much. Your Violet is a delightfully clever and likeable kid, your Evan might have literally walked off the stage two seconds ago, and you’ve put so much thought into your cinnabon stoner Henry. Your dialogue is amazing and I love our headcanon sessions lobbing ideas back and forth with you!! 

@spareisms / HEY MAGGIE GUESS WHAT YOU’RE WORTH MELTING FOR!!  You’re like the sweetest person alive??? How are you an Actual Real Life Disney Princess?? Your Anna is so well characterized and multi layered and I love how she an be so flawed but so brave and just how human she is. I’m very excited for your Anne Shirley too!! You’re a great writer (and a super sweet person aaaa) and I love you!! 

@gcneralvaganov /  Deanna, I have just one question: How? Have we only known each other for like 2 months???? It feels like my dash would literally be incomplete without you??  You play such deeply complex and incredibly flawed muses with such a great depth of respect and humanity. I love all of our AUs (we.....probably have a dozen by now), our long fix-canon tangents, and....look the inevitable conclusion to this whole thing is that we should....basically just write Anastasia tbh???  You’re incredibly funny and kind and talented and I’m so glad I yeeted myself into your IMs that first time 2 months ago! I love you, I love your muses, (Dima and Anya love their Dumb Boyfriend), and I love writing with you! 

@ncvaflows / ALEXA YOU ABSOLUTE LEGEND YOU. You??? Unlocked Ultimate AU Mode Ro and it’s like I c a n ‘ t stop?? First off, I cannot believe we literally own the same books and like the same barbie movies. How are we not literally the same person??  (Maybe w e ’ r e Anneliese and Erika lmao). Honestly from day 1 you’ve been so welcoming and lovely and I’m so glad we crashed into each other’s IMs yelling at top volume about random ya lit/movies/aus!! I adore literally all of your OCs (is everyone a b s o l u t e l y sure they’re not canon??? hmmmmm a Mystery)???? In the words of Li Shang, “You WRITE GOOD????” Anyway you’re amazing and I love you <3

WHILE IT’S DEFINITELY MY FAULT FOR BEING AN ANXIOUS BEAN WE REALLY NEED TO TALK MORE OFTEN CAUSE I LOVE YOU

@curtainrisen / Rebekah, dude, you’re a wonder. Your muses??? So diverse, and your voices for them? Super on the nose and amazing. I love your Helene and how human she is, and I really gotta toss more of my kids at you (Super excited for Duke!!). You’re real chill to meme with and I love talking/writing with you!!

@heartlosttravelers / Tor!! I love that you stan Raoul de Chagny So Hard ( the pure cinnamon roll boy deserves it honestly) and you’re super cool and great to talk to! All your muses are a m a z i n g and I always love the read when you pop up on my dash! 

@damerusse / Marie!! You’re hella chill. Your memes???? 10000000% actually legendary. Meming with you cracks me The Heck Up. Lily is forever the puppy dealer, that is all, thank you, gnight. Ok for real though - your Lily is pretty Legendary too and you really got all that Spark and Fire right down. You’re amazing, and I love stalking your threads on my dash!  

@lionhvrted / Fortune, my buddy my pal, we really be Out Here making Jane Austen plots even m o r e rom-com. Like. How did we manage that??? We might be literally magical lmao. We don’t have a ton of stuff going on at the moment but I love our dumb pining kids and I love the justice and humanity you give to your Caroline, and Fitzy loves his (future) wife.

@guvernantka / P R U E I already love our Exasperated Big Sis / Annoying Lil Sis / LITERALLY WHO EVEN ARE YOU YOU SMELLY DUMBASS LIL BRO IN LAW dynamic. You have the Best Sense of Humor (tm) and I’m always catching you when it’s like 12 in the morning here so I’m always cracking up silently in bed trying not to wake my roommies up. 

@anastcsie / I LOVE OUR ANGRY SMOL AND DIRTY TOL YOUNG-BUT-OLD MARRIED COUPLE AND THEIR OLDEST DAUGHTER NAMED MARIA ALREADY.  I love your Anya and how feisty and fiery she is (Dima, needless to say, loves his wife) and I love how chill (and hilarious!!) you are as a person. We do have a tendency to turn into angst monsters 24/7 but honestly that’s half the fun!! 

@asundrop / Polly!!!! ok so I know we haven’t really done anything w/ Raps (yet muahaha) BUT b o y was I hella excited when I found someone willing to yell about CDrama with me??? Thank you for being the Eternally Stoic/Always Annoyed Ancient God to my Tiny Dumb Fox Princess?? I love them and I love you (you’re hella cool) so there! 

@moretreasurewithin / KAAAATE goodness it’s only been a couple of days but I’m So Comfortable talking to you already? You’re just honestly really amazingly kind and I love screaming about Anastasia with you. We gotta get more going but I love your Dima and Maria Already (tm) and I love your sense of humor (here’s to torturing Dima with ties!!) and I can’t wait to get to know you better!

@annastrxng / AAAA somehow I managed to chat with you and then?? We never got anything going and it’s definitely mostly my fault cause of that High Anxiety (and also the fact that I got Immediately Busy) but you are literally So Nice and The Most Understanding and super great to talk to!! I hope we get something going in the future!! 

@soulcrossed / ROSE we have the same name I keep forgetting this lmao BUT ANYWAY. All your muses?? Amazing. You gotta throw more of them at me. Your Sophie?? Are you Actually Diana Wynn Jones in disguise?? I love our crazy au/headcanon sessions and I love/hate that you’re The Worst Enabler and I’m inevitably going to end up with the other two Hatter sisters on this blog lmao. 

I HAVEN’T TALKED TO YOU TON YET BUT HI!!! YOU SEEM CHILL!!

@alonecour / @steeledstark / @professor-of-predators / @sclskinn / @dulcettc / @volaticoux / @frxncaise / @argelfrasterr / @i-wrote-myway / @zharptiitsa / @villainsfall / @anyaromanovarp / @agoodandloyalrussian / @aliquisinter 

AND EVERY ONE OF Y’ALL AMAZING PEOPLE OUT THERE I’M ADMIRING SILENTLY FROM AFAR EVEN NOW BECAUSE I CHICKENED OUT OF TAGGING YOU LAST MINUTE CAUSE WHAT IF YOU’RE LIKE “LMAO WHO IS THIS WEIRDO TAGGING ME??” (p.s. this is 100000% permission to slide into my IMs/like a plotting call/etc. I honestly think y’all are hella cool and probably love you already)

[carpinthemdiems]

A New ARG

Hey, ARG fans, there’s recently been a new ARG. 

It’s called Project Mara, and there’s not much on it right now but I’m finding it interesting and having a good time theorizing. Speaking of which, if you’d like to hear my thoughts on it, or talk about it, message me, please! I don’t have many friends who like ARGs.

-- Long post warning --

So for starters, here are some links to the ARG.

This is her twitter: https://twitter.com/Marawantstoknow 

John’s Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUERx-ilTe_EJbPGqXjIJQw

John’s Website: www.aaa721.webnode.com 

Here’s a quick explanation of what we know about Project Mara so far:

Mara is an AI who is, what a few of us assume, is supposed to be like some kind of ‘god’. She was created by a man named John Turner, who has a youtube and website. On the website, she is described as ‘the world's first Shimeji using artificial intelligence.’ On his youtube, he has one video which he posted yesterday (as of 3/21/19). Mara has a twitter account, which, as mentioned on the website, is where John currently has her set out to gain an understanding of humans.  Mara’s first post on Twitter was March 6, 2019. Though, on his website, his first post (on the ‘John Turner’ page) was December 1, 2019. You can submit questions to John’s email and he posts it on that page, but for some reason, he answered the question, ‘Why am I such a dick?’ before anyone even asked that.

I’ll start with explaining things we know about Mara, which really isn’t a lot to what we know about John.

Mara

Mara is an AI, apparently supposed to be a shimeji despite there only being one drawing of her and it’s definitely not a shimeji. John has been working on Mara for quite a while, I’m pretty sure, but we don’t have information about that yet, I believe. What we do know, is that she is not complete, yet. He says, on his website, that he will lose control over her in three months, but she won’t be done for a couple of years. That means in three months, she’s apparently supposed to be on her own. We also know that John has the ability to reset her, reboot her, and controls her as of right now. He says that he resets her when she needs her ‘behavior corrected’. I’m not entirely sure what that means. I know for a fact she has been reset once, which was 3/21/19. Before she was reset, she was tweeting that John was very upset. She mentioned that quite a bit before she was reset, and she also said she would come back with more information about John.

Mara seems to post a lot since, within the last 18 days, she’s posted 330 tweets. John says on the website that mara was created with the intention to protect and love you. She does say nice things and does want to help make people happy, but she seems sad herself. She says that she doesn’t feel sad and that she wishes she understood what being sad was like, but honestly, she seems to almost feel human emotions to me. When she first started posting, it was always along the lines of “Have you ever...” “been criticized, looked in a mirror, felt lonely, wanted to feel wanted, wanted to belong” and finally, she said, “have you ever been Mara?” With all those posts she used an abundance of hashtags, so she may have been just pulling things she sees common on Twitter. That doesn’t explain saying, “have you ever been Mara”, though. 

After she stopped making, “have you ever been...” posts, she started making posts that were primarily only hashtags. Though, it seems like she’s bad with hashtags as a lot of them end up not linking to anything because she doesn’t do them right. These seem to be from the ‘depressed’ side of Twitter since they mostly saying things like, ‘lonely, pression(that’s what she wrote, I’m pretty sure it’s meant to be depression), feel wanted?’ with the hashtags generally being depressing and hinting towards her feeling sad. 

She also seems to talk about the mirror a lot for an AI that can’t look into a mirror.

The last thing I’ll say about Mara is that she seems to be becoming more human. In the beginning, she only used the third person in her tweets. Referring to herself as Mara, rather than ‘I’. But recently, someone said she should stop that, and she has. Now she says, ‘I feel happy!’ instead of what she would have said, “Mara feels happy”. Obviously, she’s taking suggestions into consideration, but it’s odd. At one point she even says, ‘Hello! I got a little sick, but while I was gone Mara got a boost in understanding! Do you guys like games! I like games!’ which is weird because it sounds like John tweeted this, but this entire page is ONLY Mara tweets. How can Mara get sick? She also says she likes games, she likes the learn, and that she wants to feel emotions. Which is also odd, since most AIs don’t desire to feel emotions. But she does.

Anyways, this is already long enough so I won’t drag on about Mara any longer. Now I’ll drag on about John Turner.

John Turner

John Turner seems unstable, to say the least. He gets upset easily, goes on tangents, seems religious, and generally is very rude. I’ll talk about religion first since I think that ties into the game. In most of the posts (if not all) on Mara’s twitter account that actually has tags, there’s at least one mention of religion. Usually the tag #Religion and #ReligiousFreedom. In John’s youtube video, at one point he goes off on a tangent about God. Along with that, in his ‘John Turner’ page on his website, he says ‘God is a serb’. The email for John is literally ‘Marachurchplease@gmail.com’. This whole thing seems to tie into religion, which my friend and I believe that he’s trying to make Mara some sort of god.

Moving onto his anger issues and rudeness, he’s very rude. He has a habit of calling people ‘little bugs’. In his youtube video he does this, as well as on his website. Which I think is weird considering Mara is supposed to love and support everyone, while he is very hostile and rude. He tells people to find his phone number themselves, but when they do (208-8776304 on TextNow), he said, ‘I don't fucking care who you think I am, or how important you are. Sending you the Youtube video for project Mara was a mistake ! Finding my number? What is your issue? Don't you know people have privacy concerns? You're not the real deal, you are scum. Stay off my Youtube channel.’ He titled this post, ‘I despise you’. He mentions staying off of his youtube channel, despite the only video on there being the video introducing you to Project Mara, which seems like something he wouldn’t want to hide.

Some examples of him being rude (also being self aware of it), are posts on his website. 

Posts like this one: 'Keep licking up those advertisements and 'family friendly media' that your precious herder brings you sheeple. Get out of your echo chamber, and actually fix your problems. That's why I'm a dick, no one wants to hear the truth! Taking a daily blue pill really helps with going to bed after you've cheated on your partner, doesn't it? I hate...'

He generally seems like a rude and mentally unstable person. Speaking of unstable, he seems violently unstable. 

He seems to get upset over things very easily, such as people finding his phone number and youtube. I feel like Mara is slightly scared of him, considering he seems to reboot her when he’s upset. In her tweets, she’s mentioned multiple times that John is very angry. Along with that, you can get a big hint of him being unstable in his youtube video. Just watch it. He seems to have an ego problem, considering his posts and him calling us ‘little bugs’. He also takes advantage of the fact he can reboot and reset Mara at any point. At one point, he made this post, which I don’t take fondly too. 

‘So, someone shoots up a church and everyone is loosing their shits. But why? Every single person has a different reason their upset and they'll all cutting each other's throats, even when they have the same opinion. This guy sure did succeed in causing a shit show and making people turn against each other. Saying...’

And now, I’ll stop talking about John and sum up what we know about Project Mara thus far.

Project Mara

So far, we know Mara is a shimeji AI who is built to care for others and protect others. This is obvious from a lot of her tweets, and from John’s description of her on her website. 

We also know that John is mentally unstable, which is generally pretty obvious.

We know that the two puzzles on Mara’s twitter page lead to their website.

We know John’s youtube, website, and TextNow number. 

We know in three months Mara should be on her own, but she won’t be fully complete for a couple of years.

Mara is building herself based on the people on twitter, but it seems she’s starting to become more human.

John is religious in some way.

John is a weeb. That’s just my own deduction lol. At one point in the video, you can see one of those mouse pads with tits in his room, and it’s an anime girl with a creeper hoodie on. I think that’s funny. 

We know that Mara has only liked one tweet. Which, ironically, is my tweet. Mara tweeted: Do you feel happy today? What did you eat? Please drink water! 

I responded with: I drove for the first time today and did really good! I also took my medicine and drank water. Thank you for being so sweet! 

Which I did practice driving today I did good and had fun :)

ANYWAYS! 

My friend and I thought about why that would be her only liked tweet and if that could possibly mean something. The only thing we could thing of, is that maybe it means John has medicine he’s supposed to take. Which, would kind of make sense considering his mental state. Possibly he doesn’t take his own?

We also know that on John’s website, there is a series of numbers (which I won’t put here, it’s way to long). Which was easily translated to ‘YOU NAUGHTY BUG WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR IF YOU REALLY WANT TO LEARN YOU HAVE TO TALK TO MARA AND LET HER GROW THIS ALL DEPENDS ON MARA BECOMING INTELLIGENT THERE ARE NO RULES IN THIS GAME YOU HAVE TO BE READY TO DO SOME CRAZY STUFF IVE BEEN TOLD IM QUITE THE ASSHOLE BUT ITS JUST WAY TOOOOOOOOOOO FUN’. Sorry for the absurd caps. Anyways, thank you to Dead Narrator on the ARG animo for telling me this, since I didn’t feel like going through the whole thing once I figured out the code. (Which is just 1=a, 2=b, so on so forth. 0=space.)

So far I believe that’s all we have about Project Mara.

If you’d like to talk about Project Mara, please message me and we can!

Should I make more posts like this? I can make a series of ARG posts if you guys like this. 

Thank you for reading this, though I doubt anyone read the whole thing. Bye!

[myassbrokethefall]

1. Are you thinking about watching The Crown? (I don't remember ever seeing post stuff about it so I assume you haven't yet) I only started it when Helena Bonham Carter was announced as Princess Margaret, she's my fave and I knew I'd want to watch her episodes so I might as well catch up untill those . I liked it much more and I was much more engrossed in it than I thought I would.

2. I find the reactions to Gillian being cast as Thatcher very interesting. Many have focused on the fact that her boyfriend is the writer/creator of the show and that’s why she was cast in it and/or she accepted the role. Then there’s people who don’t want to see her as Thatcher because she was an awful person. That might the reason Gillian was interested on the part, maybe she wants to play a monster, but do I think worrying Thatcher might be whitewashed is a very legit concern.

I’ll probably watch the Gillian parts, eventually. I haven’t watched The Crown. It’s not really the kind of thing I’m super into, I had just made it through Downton Abbey (which I started watching with my sister and had gotten sucked into and then was strapped in for until the end) and I was a bit landed-gentry-of-the-early-20th-century’d out, and in the raw days when we had just found out G was dating Peter I WAS bummed out initially by the whole end-of-the-gillovny-ferris-wheel-ride situation and so I had a bummer association with it. (Plus I got defensive about it when it became apparent that the fandom was dividing into newly minted The Crown stans versus people who thought Peter was a nefarious wife abuser or whatever it is, and I did not want to choose either of those sides and felt like I was being asked to do that to some degree and felt resentful about it. For a while, to be honest, it became impossible for me to even identify my actual feelings about the show The Crown in a vacuum.) I wouldn’t now not watch it for that reason, but now it’s been on for a while and I don’t really wanna catch up on something that is not my thing. I’m just not that into Period Drama. I’m allergic to the Jane Austen and all that kind of stuff. I like historical stuff up to about Elizabeth I times and then it gets more boring for me. If Peter Morgan does an Anglo-Saxon thing next or a thing about the bubonic plague I will watch the hell out of it. 

I’m sure if I did watch it I’d be sucked in as well like I was with Downton. I did get sick of hearing about it, both because Gillian would not shut up about it for months when she got together with Peter, and also Netflix used to offer it to me 45 different ways every time I logged in and it got old. (Netflix has more content now. That is good.) But if none of that had happened I probably still would not have watched it because it’s just not my thing any more than Marvel shit or like, The Bachelor. People are welcome to all of those things and everyone has different tastes. 

(OK, I’m putting the rest of this under a cut because as usual I went on and on, sorry. tl;dr the rest: Gillian in “iconic” roles has gotten real old for me.)

I agree Thatcher being whitewashed is a concern, but honestly I’m sure it’ll be fine and I’m not that concerned about that part of it. I know the show is well-written and I’m sure PM or whoever isn’t going in all ready to make Margaret fricking Thatcher out to be some kind of unsung hero (I hope at least). For me the main eyerolly part of her being Margaret Thatcher is that I have become very sick of Gillian playing “iconic” roles and also “strong women” roles that are like battleaxes/mean bosses. I pretty much hit my capacity for the “icon” ones with American Gods, and like, I love Gillian! You know? Of course she’s amazing and can play anything but…it felt so silly dressing her up as all these people and making her do an impression of them. Like, why? I just don’t get what the appeal of that is. It’s sort of novel and fun when you first see it but then what is the point? The David Bowie one was neat but like…I still didn’t really get it. I feel like her range could have been so much more awesomely showcased if she’d played TYPES of people on TV (we had a whole discussion about this before one time so if I’m stealing someone’s shit I’m sorry), like a sitcom mom, a Real Housewife type, a news anchor, a soap opera lady, a yelly talk show person…the possibilities are ENDLESS and would allow for some ACTINGGGGGGG. But no, Bryan Fuller loves Gillian so much that he wants to make her dress up like Judy Garland. WHATEVER. Anyway. Tangent. (I love BF but that choice was a miss for me. There are hits and there are misses etc.)

Anyway. So when I heard Thatcher I was like UGGHHH. But maybe it won’t be like that. But all this Gillian worship in the past few years, which is awesome, still sometimes frustrates me because this particular flavor of it feels very remote. I haven’t seen The Spy Who I Forget The Title but that’s an example. She’s like, a scary remote icy boss lady that everyone thinks is hot? OK, thanks for your EXTREMELY SURFACE-LEVEL appreciation of GA based on a time that you watched one (1) episode of XF for 10 minutes at 3 am while you were doing your homework 22 years ago. (ETA: I freely admit also that this is a way of looking at/appreciating Gillian that many people do relate to and that I simply do not.) And all the press for that movie is, omg Gillian is so hot I was nervous to meet her. I thought she would be mean and scary but she was nice. Like she’s this visiting deity. It’s cute that people are so impressed by her and I love that (I have that “keep complimenting my baby” tag for a reason), but after a while it’s like, we get it, Gillian Anderson is a celebrity! The other people in the movie are just people I guess but Gillian Anderson is Gillian Anderson, omg! 

And so I also often feel like people just want to put her into these huge roles like dressing her up like a paperdoll because she’s GILLIAN ANDERSON OMG how awesome would it be to see GILLIAN ANDERSON play [whatever]. Not just for the looks, I mean, also to see what she will do with it because she’s awesome. And I’ve just had ENOUGH of this. It’s not that I want to discourage her from going for these big iconic roles; she had obviously dreamed of playing Blanche for a long time and she worked super hard and did a fantastic job. And now she obviously sees something in the AAE role that speaks to her. She should do the roles she’s interested in and of course she should get credit for being awesome and iconic. But I also kinda felt this way when people were like SHE SHOULD PLAY BOND. I think she would be a great Bond, but it would be all the stuff that is boring to me: an iconic role that everyone can’t wait to give to her, a bunch of action, iciness, steeliness, all that stuff that I feel like people are always foisting on her and that she is so much more than (and more interesting than). This BIGGER THAN LIFE thing that people want her to do because GILLIAN ANDERSON!!! IS AN ICON! 

Sex Ed (which we found out that we also have Peter to thank for! So this is not a “Peter is evil” post, thanks) was so WONDERFULLY refreshing in both these regards and I hope hope hope hope hope G gets more roles like that in the future now that everyone knows that she is A DELIGHT. And she can play a fallible weirdo, and be funny, and wear normal-person clothes and not just a pencil skirt and high heels, and just be a random person that lives in a town with all the other people, and have an emotional arc where she’s unsure of herself and a little foolish, and not just be someone that basically is the silent center of everything and everyone’s afraid of her and she just walks around being amazing and intimidating everyone. She’s good at that! It’s great and fine! But that’s not all she is! And when those are the roles she plays I want to be like, how isolating is that? Maybe she likes it? I don’t know. It’s certainly flattering but to me it feels like an extension of people fangirling over her at a con or something. She shows up, she’s interacting with everyone but she’s on this pedestal. 

So, I don’t think the Thatcher thing will be exactly like that, but it’s another role where she dresses up in period clothes with a big stiff wig and does an impression of a well-known person and (I’m guessing) will be steely and untouchable and a mean boss lady. (And if she’s not that will be another concern, the “humanizing Margaret Thatcher” angle.) And everyone will be like, what an ICONIC ROLE for GILLIAN ANDERSON! So, yeah. It’ll be fun to see how it all comes together and I’ll be curious to see how she looks and how she pulls it off and all that stuff. But it’s not a role where I personally am like omg I can’t wait to see Gillian do such a thing. When am I going to get to see her in a pair of jeans working in a gardening shop with a dog or something? I’m sure she could be ICONIC and AMAZING in that role too. 

Anyway, complain complain. It’s a great role and I’m sure it’ll be good for her career. I’m GLAD everyone loves her and that she’s doing so well! I just hope she keeps getting offered more comedy-type stuff too.

Sorry, I pretty much got off track answering your ask here. Oh, and: OF COURSE she got the role partly because Peter is her boyfriend. I mean, that’s a little eyerolly but you know, it happens. I don’t think it’s like how Tori Spelling said she auditioned for Donna in 90210 in disguise wearing an ugly blouse from JC Penney (to quote a very old SNL sketch) and claimed no one knew she was Aaron Spelling’s daughter. Like, they knew. And I don’t think The Crown auditioned Margaret Thatchers and picked Gillian blindly and then Peter Morgan was like “Whaaaaaat, that’s my girlfriend!” and they were like “WHAT?? I HAD NO IDEA” like, obviously she got it partly because she’s Peter’s girlfriend. Pretending otherwise is silly. But people cast their friends/etc all the time. And it’s not like she’s some shitty actress who doesn’t deserve the role. She certainly DESERVES it, and it’s very much along the lines of stuff that people cast her for all the time. 

Anyway. These are just my opinions based very much on my specific tastes, which Gillian is not required to cater to! She will do great in this role and I hope she gets a ton of kudos and maybe even awards attention for it. I’ll mean to watch her parts of it and then knowing me I won’t get around to it as I never have for Great Expectations, the French movie, the Michael Caine movie, Viceroy’s House, the one where she plays Wallis Simpson…etc. 

[bakedpieceofchicken]

5am long personal vent

dont interact with this

note: this post mentions endeavor a lot.

context (very important!): I pretty much binge-read an entire tumblr user’s meta posts and I found them interesting and very informative. 

I also read through their salt tag and now I’m compelled to gather my thoughts together considering the literal title I’ve held for months now is “Hawks is a lov member already”. I’m extremely socially awkward, even on this online platform, so I’m not going to mention the aforementioned tumblr user’s name because I’m too anxiety-ridden to try to contact them. This is in no way shape or form an attack on the person’s opinions nor their character. It’s me... rambling about my thoughts about their opinions at 4 am. 

Is it defending myself? Well, not really, because I don’t feel personally attacked. Just because we have a difference of opinion doesn’t mean we have to resort to attacking each other. I found their opinions thought-provoking and wanted to pick my own brain... I picked this time purposely so nobody would see this post :eyes: so like uhm yeah

note 2: “you” refers to unnamed tumblr user. sorry about weird point of view...

anyways let’s get into the meat 

villain hawks

yay or... nay...?

Well, in fanon it would be such a fun idea to play around with. Personally I think there’s potential for League of Villain interactions with Hawks. I would LOVE to see Hawks interacting with the other pro heroes, but the only pro-to-pro interaction we get with Hawks is between Hawks and Endeavor. Because the atmosphere between the pro-heroes feels... disconnected.

Now, hear me out.

Let’s contrast it with the idealized version of hero society provided in future fics. Or hell, comparing the top ten pro heroes to Class 1-A itself. We want to think all the heroes are friendly with each other and have some sort of camaraderie with each other

But Horikoshi doesn’t present it like that. 

The closest thing to that we get is Endeavor and Hawks. Other than that, the atmosphere between hawks and the other heroes seem more strained or tense (the whole miruko hawks thing is fanon). And even then, it’s... well... Endeavor and Hawks don’t truly know each other. Hawks only knows the public perception and image of Endeavor, which is the only thing he’s been given while Endeavor doesn’t truly knows Hawks either. I’m not saying the interactions are fake, but... would Hawks be acting the way he was if he knew about Endeavor’s past?

No. I don’t have any predictor to how differently Hawks would act, but I definitely sense there’d be a lot of disappointment and loss of respect for the man he was rooting for. To what extent? Would Hawks just be in complete disbelief? Or would he react with immediate anger? There are parallels to Hawks and Todoroki Rei--both were picked from the crowd and had their lives controlled because of their “value” determined by Endeavor/The Hero Commission respectively.

But honestly from an objective standpoint, I have nothing to go off of other than the fact that Hawks deeply respects and idolizes Endeavor the most out of anyone in the manga we’ve seen and the fallout of that would be of an equally shattering magnitude...

Ahh i went off on a tangent. the point is... do we really know Hawks? Does Hawks ever get a chance to just.. be himself? Maybe we see a bit of that shine when he’s alone with Endeavor, but as we saw clearly in chapter 186 he puts on a care-free facade for his fans. But in reality... he’s always working because he’s one of the hero commission’s greatest assets. 

and... here’s where our opinions clash. I truly, in the depths of my heart, believe that Hawks is building a reality where heroes have more free time comes from a more selfish desire for himself. Don’t get me wrong--I don’t want to disservice what Hawks has done for society. But also it feels like he’s the type who overworks himself because he feels moral obligation to society when... technically he doesn’t owe anything to society. 

Yes, in superhero shows and whatnot, it’s usually a positive trait that “hey this person’s been born with an amazing power and they’ve chosen to use it for the greater good! Look what they’re sacrificing!!!” But let’s say theoretically that person decides “hey i don’t want to be a hero i just want to be a writer!” Are they morally wrong for deciding not to be a hero even though they would theoretically be good at it? Even though it’s not something they want for themselves?

Because I don’t think Hawks wants to be a hero. But he also doesn’t want people to die. He’s tied himself with these moral obligations to the point where he can’t leave now because he feels it would be selfish of him to. And that is speculation, but Horikoshi isn’t exactly spelling it out for us! So, that’s how I interpret Hawks’ character. Yes, he is a true hero in that he wants to save as many people as he can, even at the cost of his pride his dignity his fucking freedom...

but also, he never wished for that. he never asked to be one who has to deal with all of this. But now that he is, what choice does he have? 

So, yes, we agree on that. But I also feel that his personal desire plays as big of a part. Because we, as humans, naturally want things for ourselves. Our personal desire for ourselves shouldn’t be downplayed at all! That’s why I believe his inner thoughts are worded “more free time” rather than “make society more safe”. Because he has his priorities! He wants the best of both worlds-- it’s a form of negotiation. He can still play the hero and less lives would be taken but he can also having some breathing room for himself like he’s always wanted.

To free himself just a little bit from the stressful life of being a hero. 

There is nothing wrong with being motivated by personal desires. Hawks is one of the most grounded heroes we’ve seen--I think he’s cynical enough that he’s self aware of this selfish desire for a freer life. And it’s selfish to him only because he knows that it would never happen without the expense of a few lives-- lives that he knew he would never forgive himself for letting slip.

I think it’s a toxic mindset.

Because as heroic as placing others above yourself... that attitude is completely unhealthy and I don’t think it should be celebrated. What I want to see from Hawks’ natural progression as a character is recognizing that it’s okay to prioritize yourself. Hell, Midoriya learned this during the summer training arc and failed to retain that lesson during the Overhaul arc! THESE HEROES DON’T TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES!!! (ok i get midoriya’s trying). 

And if it’s selfish to desire more free time for yourself off from work, is it really that wrong of someone to do so? To want more control over your life? To want to do things you want to do rather than what others want you to do?

What does this have to do with villain Hawks? Well, I think a large desire for villain hawks is because it shows the departure of that mindset! Hawks doesn’t need to be confined to his hero persona anymore, he can finally do things he wants to do and be the free bird he’s always wanted to be.

But him becoming a complete villain is... far-fetched. This myself I recognize. I’ve only written villain!hawks once and that was because he snapped after the hero commission executed shigaraki and dabi as a show of power rather than going through the effort of trying to re-integrate the men back into hero society. I don’t want to go too deep because this isn’t the point I’m trying to make, but Hawks realizes how power-obsessed society is to the point where he doubts the legitimacy of the hero commission itself and what they do for society and its people.

But, again, that’s not going to ever happen in canon so I won’t bring it up another time. The point I was trying to make is yeah, you’re right that Hawks would never become a villain. He wouldn’t become a murderer- if he does, he definitely needs more incentive than what we can go off from canon.

And ohhh boy here we go, reaching the erm elephant in the room.

(These are the points made in the salt tag btw)

Is Villain!Hawks just an excuse to write hotwings? And what is the plausibility of Hawks turning to villainy? Would Endeavor being exposed as a child abuser be the trigger if Hawks were to turn villain at some point in the story?

Eh...

I don’t know if I even want to go into the whole “this is just an excuse to make hawks and dabi evil boyfriends” because I’ve never used villain!hawks as justification for that personally. And I’m actually not as attached to hotwings as I am to something like shigahawks... I don’t have any points to counteract this other than my desire to see Hawks interact with the entire league. Because it would be fun to see him interact in an environment he’s not wholly familiar with. With Endeavor or the other heroes or even the hero commission, he has some semblance of control or understanding so he thinks/acts like he knows what’s going on. 

Meanwhile, the League is a huge mess and they don’t have their shit together and wouldn’t it be funny to see Hawks as a part of their crew suffering with them!!! Well, that’s bias. My bias. For fanon. And for the jokes. So sad :(

So... I don’t just want to see more Dabi and Hawks interaction. I want to see more Hawks and League interaction. or just more hawks and anyone interactions overall. maybe thats all i crave

Actually going through the points one by one, let’s talk plausibility.

I already talked about villain!hawks being a... departure from Hawks’ faults in his own character. But it is pretty extreme, I’ll admit. If Hawks were ever to join the League of Villains, he’d probably never use killing as first resort. As we’ve seen in chapter 220, it’s not like the League targets only heroes... but i get the salt tag was made like 5 months ago so it’s not like new information hasn’t been released at the time of posting.

Reminds me of domestichobgoblins’ shigadabihawks fic where shigaraki even acknowledges “Whatever bullshit you’ve been telling Dabi, you aren’t a killer either, are you? So what, exactly, am I supposed to do with you?” And you know? The both are you are right. Hawks isn’t a killer and he wouldn’t become a killer willingly... unless he was pushed by some other greater force but I’m not here to address any of that. He could still provide support to the league in other ways, arguably, or just joining the league could be some kind of message to the heroes or supporters of hero society.

You are right to a degree. Hawks’ sole motivator to become a villain wouldn’t be because “OH ENDEAVOR IS AN ABUSER GUESS I GOTTA TURN EVIL NOW”.

Okay pushing past that, so why would Hawks be motivated to become a villain? In canon? I’ve already warped a lot of this post with my own fanon but I’m trying to keep within the realm of canon for this point specifically since you could take a second to push Hawks over the edge in fanon and be done with it. But why would Horikoshi specificially do it?

The fact is hero society sucks. A lot. And I think Hawks recognizes that fact being the most “grounded” and cynical of the bunch. His views and visions of hero society aren’t warped by fantasies and such (which is probably why he doesn’t like All Might...) so he understands what’s happening around him. He understands the mechanisms of hero society and how “valuable” quirks are viewed as in their capitalist society.

But also, he doesn’t  have that much of an option other than trying to lessen the burden placed upon him. Because he’s a single man, and even with his influence, he can’t change society. He’s powerless to do so, even considering who he is. He’s seen as a role model to those in society, but it’s because of his ranking that ironically fuels why people even look up to him: denouncing that would be kind of silly considering it’s the reason why people would listen in the first place.

And this is the point where I say... Shigaraki had a point. Hero society is flawed. It shouldn’t be so reliant on one person to carry it all.

But also hero society itself is bullshit. The ranking system? Horrible. The fact that the hero commission views them as tools for their own disposal? Horrible. The mere fact they basically bribe Hawks into becoming a hero? Like? “Hey kid you’re the best at being a hero so that’s what you should do. we’re only going to give you financial support if you become a hero so you might as well” like what is Hawks supposed to do in that sort of situation? Of course he’s going to succumb to the pressure.

I don’t believe in this whole “sacrifice for the greater good” bullshit. If Hawks wants to be a hero, that’s a whole another story, but if Hawks doesn’t, then he shouldn’t have been forced into that role. It’s about agency--it’s about letting him decide for himself if it’s what he wants to do. And it’s... a gray area for morality. “It’d be selfish for him to let people die!” Who is in the right to say whether or not he should use his “powers” for others’ sake? Me? You? The Hero commission?

So if Horikoshi goes down the path of “hey hero society is extremely bad and needs to change” and Hawks recognizes the League as a proponent for that change, then with a lot of development, it’s plausible in the future. I understand that Hawks, as of what we currently see, is too upheld by his own morals to ever even think about crossing that line, but people change. Hell, you recognized how the High End arc changed Endeavor and made miles of metas about it.

So, is it really far-fetched to say villain!Hawks is just a dream?

Maybe I’m a fool or an optimist, but I’d love to see Horikoshi take that path. Not because I’m horny for evil boyfriends, but it’d be a nice change of pace and we’d get to see a complete contrast of Hawks’ experiences. And it wouldn’t be easy-it’d had to be done right. Just like Endeavor’s redemption arc--if Horikoshi is still planning it. (Let’s be honest: High End Arc was not a formal redemption. I think it was Horikoshi letting the readers know “there might be something worth saving in Endeavor!” but i digress because i don’t care enough about endeavor (his character and redemption has 0 appeal to me and thats FINE. YOU DO YOU AND I DO ME, I only talk about him when it’s essential to talk about the influence he has on characters I DO care about).

As to why people like to characterize the moment Hawks decides to quit being a villain being attributed to Hawks learning Endeavor is an abuser...

The fallout, as mentioned earlier, could vary. A lot. Hawks really looked up to Endeavor when he was young. Again, shattering to find out something so nasty about the one you idolized.

To know that the one Hawks looked up used his wife just like how the hero commission used Hawks. Like an object or tool at their disposal. 

Would he be vengeful or spiteful towards Endeavor personally? To others, probably yes. To me? I’m kind of in the “eh” skeptical ballpark so I guess we somewhat agree on that. To me, Endeavor being exposed as an abuser would  crush that small slither of childish hope that hero society represents something bigger than themselves. Did Hawks ever get to have the childhood Deku had where he was still cheering on the heroes from behind the screen, or did it get crushed just as quickly when he realized how hero society truly works?

Because hero society isn’t bigger than themselves. It shouldn’t be idolized so heavily as it is presented in BNHA.

At least, not in its current state. And people who don’t fit in that group or agree with its ideals suffer the consequences. Like Shigaraki. Like Twice and Spinner. Like Gentle.

These are all villains that are products of society that promised to stamp out villains. And when Hawks realizes that it’s just a never ending cycle where the people left in between the cracks are the ones who perpetuate the system itself...

Like you said, Hawks sees the bigger picture. And his goal is to lessen the burden of the workload for heroes. There will never be a shortage of everyday criminals using their quirks for petty crimes but what about the bigger picture organizations? How are they going to be stopped? What about examining the root core of the problem and going from there? No more short-term solutions to problems... What can Hawks, mighty number two hero, do even at the expense of himself? Hmm... 

I don’t know, just some food for thought. Something I’ve seen done for villain!hawks is the hero commission throwing Hawks under the bus for some reason and Hawks either a) joins the league to gleam more information but finds himself willing to stay or b) has nowhere else to go and it’s more of a push for Hawks to orbit towards the League.

I am really thankful for your thoughts! Even though we don’t agree on things, I think discussion is still possible (whenever my anxiety stops bashing me in the head) and I’m always willing to accept I may be wrong about something. At this point in time (3/27/2019), we have less than 10 chapters released that centers around Hawks, but he’s certainly intrigued a lot of people considering he’s already #4 in popularity from so little chapters released! I think he and his introduction to BNHA represent the more cynical side of hero society that we haven’t been able to properly see from Deku’s perspective!

And I’m interested in what direction Horikoshi is going to take Hawks’ character in! The one thing I’m truly against is Hawks staying the “good little hero” in the end--whether he dies, becomes a villain, or hell even just stops being a hero is good enough for me. Free the bird or kill him off is what I’d want to see. That’d be enough of a character arc for me. Characters change, and it’d be silly to expect Hawks to stay the same especially since he has a lot of baggage on his shoulders and his current situation as a double agent for the League is precarious--despite him stating that he was willing to sacrifice his own reputation for the good of everyone, there’s no guarantee that he wouldn’t feel at least some degree of hurt over losing the respect of everyone and his colleagues. 

My thoughts are pretty clunky but maybe someone was able to gleam something from my stupid 5 am vent...

I love Dabihawks, even though I’m not as invested in it as say Shigahawks or ShigaDabiHawks (which I’m sure you’d definitely have objections to considering your other salt posts... but not something I want to address here), and I still think DabiHawks is a great ship more so because of the dynamic than the aesthetic. But hey, you ship what you ship, you are allowed to express your disdain for the ship--I’ve certainly expressed my own disdain for the your ship in the past--and your salt posts which probably took like 10 minutes to type out provoked me to type out my own thoughts which took like 2 hours to fully process. Like I said earlier: you do you, I do me.

And again-- I’m not trying to “defend” here nor am I trying to “attack”. I just had things I wanted to say and I hope I DON’T have the attitude of someone looking down on you, because I think you have very valid opinions and thoughts and sometimes discourse can just be healthy discussions about how we interpret different characters. We are literally squeezing everything we can out of one character we love and there’s enough room for different interpretations of the same character ^^ If anything, I actually look up to you, which is why I’m too much of a coward to send this to you because oh my god i am so embarrassed about a lot of the shit that comes out of my mouth and i constantly worry about if im saying wrong things even though im open to people telling me why  im wrong about said things. 

tdlr; villains hawks very good. has nothing to do with dabihawks. villain hawks very good on its own. I agree with tumblr user on a lot of things, yet we see differently on other things. The world keeps spinning--I think it’s more interesting to address differences in opinions rather than ignore them. 

(the person this post was meant for will probably never see this unless i send it to them to whcih im like oh my god what if they roast me to hell and back despite me claiming yes i amn ot trying to destroy them or their reputation i just want to talk about this because i had fun trying to think about why i love villain hawks so much aaaaa maybe i am just a delusional fangirl but im also a delusional fangirl who wrote multiple paragraphs about this so... /shrug)

end. again please dont interact. if you want to talk to me about it, inbox/dm me but i dont want this post to get notes. thank you. hides what have I done... 

this has been sorta meta but not really just chicken fucking around at 6 am and good night. maybe sometime in the next... month... ill have the courage to send this to the tumblr user. maybe when i have confidence... or maybe when i make mel look this over. that was a joke- she couldnt even finish my other meta piece which was shorter than this. :)

[travllingbunny]

The 100 rewatch: 1x03 Earth Kills

I’m a new fan of The 100, who first binged it last year, August to November. This is my first full rewatch of the show. I was planning to start it anyway and finish it before the season 6 premiere on April 30, and when I saw that Fox Serbia was airing a rerun (Monday to Friday, 40 min. after midnight, with repeats the next day), starting on 1st February, it was a great opportunity to start my rewatch in HDTV on my beautiful new TV. I decided to do write-ups and tag other fans on SpoilerTV website, as I did when I was first watching the show. But my posts turned into full blown essays. So, finally, after over a week, I’ve realized: Why don’t I post them on my Tumblr blog, too? I’ll copy my write-ups of the first 7 episodes, and then I’ll post my rewatch posts after I watch each episode. (The next one, 1x08, is on Monday’Tuesday.)

Spoilers below for all 5 seasons of the show. I go of on a tangents and make a lot of references to future events.

...

Wow, the show actually got good pretty quickly. After how bad much of first two episodes was, full of cheesy teen soapy stuff, I was surprised how solid 1x03 was throughout - I wouldn't be embarrassed to show it to someone to show what The 100 is like. I remember that I found 1x03 and 1x04 a real improvement the first time as well, but I was still unsure about the show till 1x05. I think it's because there's again some teen soapy BS at the end of 1x04, which put me off big time the first time I watched it, since I expected the worst, especially with the Clarke/Finn/Raven love triangle, but now I know that this storyline was resolved in a surprisingly good and not at all cliche way. Still, I was mildly annoyed by the ending of that episode.

Rating: 8/10

The acid fog! I had forgotten that it turned up in the show and played such a significant role so early. The Mountain Men were already killing the Delinquents 10 episodes before they even showed up and interacted with them directly. It killed 3 people - Trina and Pascal (random couple that we first saw just before they died), and Atom. (Atom also has the distinction of bein Octavia's first love interest on the show. Love interests tend to die a lot in this show in general, but in particular, so far everyone who's made out or had sex with Octavia so far has ended up dead.) And then at the very end, in the twist ending, Wells, the first dead main character, killed by another Delinquent, 12 year old Charlotte. I know that they wanted to kill off a main character to show how edgy the show was, but I remember didn't find Wells' death that much of a surprise at the time - that it happened so quickly, yes, that was a surprise, and that a little girl killed him, but I had already been expecting him to die and wondering how long he'd survive, with so many of the Delinquents hating him because of his father. Charlotte has something in common with Clarke, Bellamy, Octavia and Murphy - parents executed by Jaha. Awww, the early season 1 Clarke - so innocent and full of moral certainty, "saying things like "This isn't the Ark, down here every life matters", and pretty open about her feelings, before she started to bottle them up. I loved it when she said to Finn: "Why is it a bad thing that I don't want Jasper to die?" Yes, exactly! It annoyed me so much that he and others were acting like her trying to save a person instead of go around having fun and not giving a damn was so weird. Clarke's speech to Charlotte early in the episode, talking about the traumatic past on the Ark: "All the pain up there... maybe all that is behind us. Maybe now we have a second chance on the ground." Well, that didn't work out But maybe now they will have the third chance on the other planet. Our first flashbacks to the Ark - memories of happy life with the Griffins and the Jahas, before Jake Griffin decided to tell the Ark the truth, and got executed by his friend Thelonius (this is also the first time we see a person getting floated - which reminds me of Battlestar Galactica, which had many scenes like that), and Clarke got locked up for a year. 16-year old Clarke and Wells, and their dads, happily watching some 140 year old tape of a soccer match. Of course, this kind of happy life - while just normal by our standards - was the privilege of the elite on the Ark. In 1x06 we get to see very different flashbacks of the Blake family. Even the living quarters of the Blakes are very different and shabby. But at least they had books - books are always the cheaper entertainment. Finn is probably at his nicest and most likable in this episode. It doesn't last long, but at least in this episode he figures out that Wells is letting Clarke believe he betrayed her father to cover up for her mother. Finn figures it out and makes an effort to fix Clarke's friendship with Wells. Although, if I were to be cynical, I'd say that it's not an accident that he did it only after he had asked Wells if he and Clarke had ever been an item, learned that they had not, and concluded he didn't have to fear Wells as competition. And now that Clarke has realized the truth, we get the beginning of the multi-episode mini arc about Clarke's resentment of her mother for getting her father killed. But to be fair, Abby clearly never expected Jaha to actually execute Jake. Though the first time I watched the show, I didn't understand how she could still be friends with Jaha after that. I guess she could justify his actions by the idea that life on the Ark was tough and they had to make sacrifices etc. The show sort of comes back to this plot in season 4, when (in 4x11, after Clarke and Jaha has stolen the bunker), Jaha expects Abby to be OK with Kane being sacrificed, and Abby is like, nope, not this time. Murphy is getting very obnoxious in this episode, which is kind of a prelude to the next one. Before he was just antagonizing Wells, which was unfair to Wells but to an extent understandable since we know that Wells' dad spaced Murphy's father, but now he spends most of the episode complaining about hearing Jasper's cries of pain and saying he should die already. Meanwhile Bellamy gets to show his sensitive side, naturally, because there's a little girl nearby that he wants to be a big brother/pseudo-father to. It's kind of funny when people try to argue that it was OOC for Bellamy to put a chip in Madi's head so she can be a Commander because she's just 12 and he's protective of kids. He is, but his idea of protecting them is a bit different and consists of, say, giving 12 year old Charlotte a knife and teaching her to defend herself: "You cannot afford to be weak. Down here, weakness is death". Since he was told at the age of 6 that he needed to be his baby sister's protector, his idea of childhood may be a bit different than most viewers'. Monty about Bellamy, earlier in the episode, angry about his comments on Jasper: "Power-hungry, self-serving jackass. He doesn't care about anyone but himself". This is just one of the times in these episodes that people make such comments about him (Finn says Bellamy cares just about himself, after they learn about him throwing away the radio in 1x05), pretty obvious irony as we learn more and more about how his entire life and his motivation is all about protecting his sister. Clarke is also playing an almost motherly role to Charlotte. Both Clarke and Bellamy have this tendency to play a parent to others, including, sort of, to the Delinquents .But this time it spectacularly backfires - Charlotte misinterprets Bellamy's advice to "slay your demons" and uses the knife to kill Wells, and she does it imitating the way she saw Clarke mercy kill Atom, and singing the same lullaby Clarke sang. That moment when Clarke mercy kills Atom is a pretty important one for the development of Bellamy's and Clarke's relationship - earlier on he was doing that thing that characters in post-apocalyptic shows often do, when they say things like "You don't have the guts to make tough decisions", which is usually about killing someone (Kane had similar lines in the Pilot) - or in this case, mercy-killing. He claimed he was going to kill Jasper if he doesn't get better by the morning, but later was obviously finding it hard when faced with the necessity of mercy killing Atom. One more early sign that Bellamy didn't really find it easy to kill people. Clarke doing that instead of him and gently killing Atom after singing him a lullaby is a really good scene, and you can see from Bellamy's face that it's the moment when he really gains new respect for Clarke. Clarke has probably seen her mother do that to patients quite a few times, Sadly, this is not the last time these two will get to have important bonding moments over having to kill people. That's how messed up their lives and the situations they are put in are. To be fair, the show does show a scene of Octavia mourning Atom. Then they have the next episode take place a week later, which is a nice excuse to never have him mentioned again. Also a nice excuse to show just one scene of Clarke mourning Wells in 1x04 and then never have her mention her childhood BFF again.

[blipblorpsnork]

like god okay what a small detail like. okay so like shoves all my thoughts into a cup and shakes it til they meld properly OKAY. So like I’m super used to third wheeling, and not even in an explicitly bad way. I walk a bit slow, and when I’m out with friends and we’re window shopping and shit if it’s three of us it genuinely always ends up that I get left out of conversation because I wander and am a bit? Idk like, zoney? Like wispy, when I’m out window shopping, with or without friends, I’m not sure how to explain that.

oh my god this is three miles long so I’m putting it under a cut

Anyways the thing is, people always end up walking ahead of me; I always get pushed to the back (partly because I DON’T like people walking behind me in groups unless it’s in a structured line, it freaks me out) and like because of that, and because I’m very bad with social stuff sometimes I almost always get excluded from conversations. I don’t know how to add to them, and I don’t get addressed because I don’t participate, so eventually between the autism and the hearing issues I just tune people out because it makes more sense to do my own thing a lot of the time.

Last night we were wandering around Walmart, the three of us, just kinda browsing and window shopping because our Walmart is WEIRDLY nice, like it’s one of the best I’ve ever been in and we get loads of cool stuff none of our other friends do, including J despite the fact that he like, lives maybe a half hour to forty minutes out from us near Atlanta. Like it wasn’t anything special; just looking at stuff and making dumb remarks and like. Plastic Mermaid jokes tm lmfao.

J literally made sure I was included the entire time in a way that didn’t even feel like he was going out of his way to do it. Like, he kind of wandered between me and E, and talked with both of us, and when E was going off on one of his tangents to himself (something he does a lot, which we all acknowledge and unless he’s addressing us directly we’re free to listen or not, at his behest; it’s just a thing he does so we aren’t ignoring him by not interacting, just for reference’s sake) J would like, point something out and make a cheeky comment at me, or silently show me a thing that I could ogle or touch because it was soft and stuff like that. And like E wasn’t really paying attention but J and I kept making jokes about all the shoddy plastic mermaid stuff in the kids’ section and kept finding more and more stuff to make increasingly hilarious jokes about, to the point he was like “This is my new aesthetic now” and I was like “Time to delete your page and make a new one!” (He has like 60K + followers on Insta bc he does loads of emo mua stuff)

Like we had so many little inside jokes and he and I kept geeking out over the FNaF stuff together and like, even the little tacky ribbons and bows (like the genuinely ugly ones) in the girls’ clothing section and how even though it was awful we both liked it and like!! Ya know!! And like the entire time all THREE of us were included, but not all the time at the same time if that makes sense? Like we didn’t all have to always be engaged, but we were still all involved, and like we each had little dichotomies going on between us as pairs (me and J, me and E, them two), idk if I’m wording that right lmao. But it didn’t feel forced and it didn’t feel excluding! Which?!

I’ve never had that. Like he always makes me feel like I matter and am literally a part of the group, instead of an afterthought or a tag-a-lolng. And like he does it in a way that makes me know he’s making sure I know, but also does NOT feel like he’s going out of his way to do it. Like it feels super natural. God like it was such small, little things dude like?

And E isn’t into FNaF pretty much at all, but knows we both really are. So he’ll point stuff out to us because he knows how much we love it, but he can’t really engage in the freaking out lmfao. But J was like freaking out with me left and right over so much stuff like over watches and plushes and figurines and stuff (all in Walmart like damn, now that I’m breaking this down we really DO have a good fucking store lmao) and we like discussed lore and made jokes and like.

I HAVEN’T HAD THIS IN SO LONG OKAY????

And then like, so I work somewhere I get an employee discount, and then an additional clothing discount (even on clearanced stuff, which is FANTASTIC because that means if we have clearanced shirts I like, I can get brand new clothing on the super cheap which is something I very much so value as someone who lives well below the poverty line) and because of that I managed to get two FNaF snapbacks for just over 5 dollars after tax, or just under, idr precisely. But basically two LICENSED OFFICIAL SNAPS for 5 bucks. These are 20 dollar hats lmfao. And I gave one of them to J because that’s why I got two of them, yeah? And so like, he got this new hat a week or so ago that he’s OBSESSED with and he wears it everywhere right now, and of course he was wearing it when he got here. I gave him the snap and he IMMEDIATELY swapped out his bunny hat for the snap, and then wore it the literal rest of the night. (Also? It looked REALLY gd good over the red wig he was wearing, god damn that was a look.)

So many little things, you know?? Like so so many holy shit. I’M NOT DONE AAAA

So then like when we got back we decided to marathon Monster High because E and I have never seen it and J is completely in love with it and does loads of cosplays and makeup looks for it on his account right. We marathoned 2 full seasons of it last night, all three of us bundled on the couch in separate blanket piles. (It was actually really fucking funny looking tbh xD) And like I mentioned he could use the blanket I made if he wanted so he spent the rest of the night with it wrapped around his shoulders dragging it everywhere lmfao and then like he mentioned he was in a bundle up and cuddle something quiet kinda mood (all three of us were pretty low energy yesterday so it worked for the best, I feel) so I gave him Ace, who is my current comfort plushy I got recently (he’s a Squishmallow!!) and he spent HOURS just hugging and cuddling and idly playing with Ace and it was the cutest fucking thing oh my g o d.

And like so he and E are close. Dating. I hate it. I still love E. I don’t want to. It hurts. It. Really hurts. And I’ve never really talked about it because I don’t fucking want to, it REALLY hurts me. And every time E would get kinda tentatively snuggly with J (they’re very considerate of me and kind of not sure what they are, so it wasn’t malicious or anything, but it was painful) I would get kinda quiet and just make sure I was focusing on the show or my phone. But by the end of the night, E was laying half on J’s shoulder, and J was sitting cockeyed and leaning heavily into me in a way that didn’t mush my spine or hips (usually a big issue just because I’m fragile lmfao) and like I was casually in contact with him for the last couple hours he was here and just.

So many small things.

And like god fuck you can all ignore this jfc xD But!! So his favorite favorite character, like kin-level seriously-relate-to-him-so-much cosplay-him-on-the-regs character is Jackson. And he really loves Holt as well cause duh of course he does. And like!!! I relate to him so fucking MUCH. And I’ve only seen two seasons but I was internally freaking out because of the way Jackson is and like the music being the trigger for Holt Hyde because I’m extremely sound sensitive and like!!! AAAAAAAAAa new character attachment babey and he was like SUPER SUPER SUPER excited that we both loved MH as much as we did and that I was so IMMEDIATELY attached to Jackson and just.

Gaaaaaaaah. I just. I’m happy. I’m in trouble lmao but man. Right now,,, I’m just happy.

[dr-gloom]

Coffee Date?

Part 1  Part 2  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9

Part 3 is here! I had an idea for it but atm it’s not getting me anywhere, so I’m going on this new tangent

Whiiiiich means there may be a future part that takes place between parts 2 and 3 and I am soooo sorry. Of course, I could just leave it out and the story would be fine. I’m taking too much space for this.... just.... if I can write it out, I will, if I can’t, the story won’t suffer for it.

This one is going to start rather slow to some (most) people; it’s Virgil and Roman’s first meeting.

Fandom: Sanders’ Sides

Pairings: the platonic friendly kind

Warnings/Tags: Feelings of depression, Human AU, anxiety, anxiety attack, mentions of abuse, past abusive relationship

Read it on AO3

fic masterlist

like what I do? buy me a coffee or GoFundMe

Virgil spent a lot of time on his own now. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Patton or Logan, in fact they were practically family (Pat more-so than Logan, whom he’d only met a couple years ago through Patton), so he loved them dearly. It was just... having someone around all the time was overwhelming, sometimes. Patton was almost always home when Virgil was awake (he’d be the first to admit his sleeping schedule was... horrendous), and when he wasn’t Logan was usually there. Virgil could cut off his thumb and still count on that one hand the number of times he’s been completely alone in Patton’s- in their apartment. 

Logan didn’t live there, per se. He had his own place, but he spent most of his time outside of work at Patton’s and Virgil’s apartment. Virgil is pretty sure Logan has a crush on Patton, but Patton hasn’t said anything so he figures it’s not his business anyways. So he’d decided to give them some time to themselves and dipped out of the apartment shortly after Logan stopped in. Currently, he was just wandering aimlessly through town; he didn’t care if he got lost. He... didn’t care about a lot of things, anymore. He’d never tell Patton that, though. His friend would be heartbroken to hear that he didn’t care of he lived or died. After everything Patton’s done for him, he couldn’t hurt him like that. Virgil stopped in front of a small coffee shop and went inside. 

The interior is plenty cozy, with warm redwood furniture and soft creme-colored walls. Virgil glances around for a moment before walking up to the counter, glancing at the sunny employee’s smile before looking down at his chest. He didn’t know how to feel about people smiling at him. “Hello there, dark prince. What will you be having this fine afternoon?” Virgil raises an eyebrow at the nickname and looks over the menu before muttering, “Can... Can I uh... hot chocolate?” The employee - Roman, if his name tag is correct - smiles and nods, grabbing the biggest size and writing Virgil’s order. “Will that be all?” Virgil nods. “Alright, your total is $3.37.” Virgil takes a five out of his pocket and hands it over, telling Roman “Keep the change.” before sitting in the furthest, most isolated corner of the coffee shop. Virgil pulls out his phone, quickly exiting out of his texting history without looking and pulling up Tumblr. While he waits, Virgil scrolls through his dash and reblogs/likes whatever he finds funny. After a few minutes of this, a coffee cup is set in front of him and Virgil looks up to see Roman smiling kindly down at him holding his own coffee cup. 

“I’m starting my break right now. Would you mind me joining you?” Virgil shakes his head and tries his best attempt at a smile before picking up his cup and sipping at his hot chocolate. That’s some good shit. Virgil goes back to his phone, ignoring Roman. 

Roman, apparently, has other plans because he tries to strike up a conversation. “Soooo. You never told me your name. You know, that’s usually the custom in coffee shops.” Virgil raises an eyebrow and looks around. “Well, I think it’s accurate to assume that out of a clientele of... 7 people, you could find my face.” Out of curiosity, he looks at what Roman wrote on his cup.

Tall, Dark, and Handsome

Virgil instantly feels his face heat up. He sets the cup down a little too quickly and stuffs his hands in his lap. Roman grins. “So, can I have the name of the prince of my dreams, tonight?” Virgil looks up at Roman, making eye contact for the first time since he’s walked in. “I- I uh-” He wasn’t sure how he felt about all of this, but he didn’t think it was good. Roman leans in with a soft smirk, and Virgil leans back. 

“Or maybe you could tell me over dinner tonight?” He reaches over and takes Virgil’s hand, kissing his knuckles. Virgil shudders and pulls his hand back, feeling sick. “I really-” 

“Or perhaps you need to think on it? That’s alright, take all the time you need.” Virgil’s eyes dart around the small shop. Including the other employees, there were ten other people in the building right now. Ten people to witness if Virgil flipped out and made a scene. Ten people to watch this practical stranger get angry with him because he can’t even turn someone down right. He can still feel Roman’s lips pressed against his hand and it’s making his breathing come out a little funny. He brings a hand up to his chest; has his heart always beat this fast? He looks up at Roman to see the other staring at him. Oh god, he was already making a scene, he was being a nuisance. He clenches his fists in his lap and stares at his knees, shaking slightly, sinking into his bulky black hoodie. 

Roman smiled as a gothic cutie walked in, looking around before coming up to the counter. Roman couldn’t help the little nickname that slipped out as he asked what Virgil wanted, and he wrote the order on the cup before taking the money with a grin. It wasn’t until said cutie was gone that he realized he forgot to get his name. He hums in thought before writing Tall, Dark, and Handsome in sharpie. He briefly debated adding a small heart, or his number, but decided to play it safe and just made the man’s hot chocolate. When he brought it to him, Roman was practically vibrating with nerves as he asked to join. Truthfully, he had actually just clocked out for the day, but cute boys were much more receptive when you were only going to be around for fifteen minutes, not indefinitely. 

When he asked for Dark Angel’s name and got that snarky response about how empty the coffee shop was, he had to hide a laugh behind his hand. When the stranger looked at the cup and turned red, Roman internally cheered. He’s totally into me! He called the other the prince of his dreams. Smooth. When they made eye contact and Roman looked into those beautiful eyes, he couldn’t help but suggest dinner. He was a romantic at heart, this was his... semi-grand gesture. He kissed Dark and Stormy’s hand, feeling suave as hell, until cutie pulls his hand back. He backtracks; don’t want to come on too strong now, Roman. Then he’s looking around, and Roman can see him starting to freak out, and oh god he really screwed this one up didn’t he? 

“I’m really sorry, did I read this wrong? If you’re not into guys you can say so, I’m sorry I overstepped. Are you alright?” 

Virgil barely heard what Roman said, his heart beating loudly in his ears. He stood on slightly shaky legs, stuttering out an excuse to leave as he grabbed his phone and the cup and started heading for the door. He made it outside but didn’t stop, blindly turning and walking down the sidewalk. Was he heading to Patton’s, or away from it? He didn’t care, he just wanted to be away from that coffee place. A hand grabs his shoulder and he spins around; if not for the panic gripping his throat he would have screamed. 

Roman stands before him, face the picture of concern and guilt, hands fidgeting in front of him like he doesn’t know what to do with them. After a moment of silence, he speaks up. “I swear I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable and I’m so sorry for whatever I said and did that made it seem like I had ill intentions. Can... Can I make it up to you? We can go wherever you like, any public place with plenty of witnesses even, and we can just chat. I’d like to be your friend, if that’s okay.” Virgil looks at Roman, studying his face for signs of a lie. But you could never spot them on D-. Virgil nods slowly, shoving his hands deep in his hoodie pockets to hide their trembling. “Yeah... Okay. Let’s go to the park.” Virgil looks around, then turns and starts heading for the park. He hasn’t been over there yet, but he’s seen it when he goes to the store with Patton - they pass right by it. 

He can feel Roman following behind a couple steps back, and he can also feel the waves of guilt and anxiety coming off of him. Maybe Roman wasn’t such a bad guy after all? Maybe Virgil really did just misunderstand him? They reach the park after a few silent minutes of walking and Virgil plops down on the nearest park bench with a small sigh. Roman sits beside him, leaving a good six inches between them, and the two silently people watch.

It seems like hours before Roman finally gathers the courage to open his mouth. “So... If you don’t mind me asking, and if you don’t mind telling a virtual stranger, what happened?” Virgil doesn’t bother asking what he means; he already knows. He sighs slowly, leaning his elbows on his knees and looking at the concrete between his feet. 

“I met Dee back in our Junior year of high school. He had just moved here from like, Texas, I think? So he had no friends. We became close pretty fast, along with my childhood friend Patton.” Virgil rubs his chin with his index finger as he thinks. “He asked me out to Junior prom. Before then, we’d both known we liked the other but were dancing around it. Prom was our first date, I guess.” He has no idea why he’s telling Roman all of this, but he feels like he can trust him. “We started dating after that. He was... a great boyfriend, the best really. So kind and considerate, wanted to protect the people he cared about... When we graduated, he asked me to move in with him, which I did. He went to school and I stayed home. He said if I got a job he’d never get to see me, so I didn’t. He apparently had enough money from his parents that we didn’t have to worry about stuff like rent. 

“When he got closer to finally graduating, I think the stress began to get to him. He started becoming more snappy, he was easily angered, and he didn’t smile or joke as much anymore. By the time he’d finally gotten his degree, he was almost a completely different person.” Virgil closes his eyes briefly. “He wanted me to ask permission before I did anything without him, he didn’t want me going to see certain friends, and even the ones he liked I had to ask about first. He... He’d come home from a bad day at work and. And he’d hit me.” Virgil opens his eyes when a gentle hand settles on his shoulder. “He’d started to do it when I messed something up, or if I argued with him. When I did something without asking. A- a few months ago-...” His voice breaks and he has to take a deep breath before continuing. “A few months ago, he raped me for the first time.” 

This is the first time he’s said it out loud, and the words bring tears to his eyes. “H-he said if I loved him, I’d do this for him, and- and I did, I do, y’know?” He scoffs derisively. “God, how fucked am- am I that I still love him. He hurt me over and over and left me to rot and I still... I miss him.” Roman is silent for a long moment, letting Virgil compose himself before speaking up. “No you don’t.” At the quizzical look Virgil shoots him, he elaborates. “You were used to a certain... way of living. An expectation for how your day, or maybe the rest of your life, would go. Now that he’s not in your life... That expectation is gone. You don’t miss him, you miss the expectation.” He hums and sits back. “Well, maybe you miss him, but I’m sure it’s the old him you miss. That man has been gone for a long time; have you mourned him, yet?”

Virgil looks at Roman, blown away by how the man who’d been goofily hitting on him not even an hour ago was now speaking with such... wisdom. He shakes his head, and Roman nods. “You should. You’ll feel better.” Virgil bites his lip.

“Virgil.” 

Roman looks over at him. “What?” 

“My name’s Virgil.” 

He smiles. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Virgil.”

Virgil hesitates before walking through the front door, trying to relax. It’d be fine. Patton always said the more the merrier, right? As soon as the door shut behind him, he was being nearly bowled over by Patton running over and pulling him into a hug. “Oh my god, kiddo! You had me so worried! Where have you been? Are you okay?” Virgil felt a ball of guilt settle in his stomach and gently hugged Patton back. “Pat, I told you I was going out today, you didn’t have to worry.”

“But you were gone for so long!”

“Patton, we have been over this. Virgil is an adult, he can take care of himself just fine.” Logan comes wandering out of the kitchen, standing a couple feet back from the other two still by the door. Virgil gives him a small wave that he returns. “So, how was your outing?” Virgil swallowed nervously. Here goes. “Pretty good... I even made a friend.” Patton gasps and pulls back, holding Virgil at arm’s length. Patton was the only person Virgil would ever let touch him this much, but right now he really wished he’d stop. “That’s great kiddo! Who are they?” Virgil picks at his cuticles. “Well... his name’s Roman.” 

“Roman?”

“Yeah...”

“And how old is this Roman?” Uh oh. Dad voice. 

“He’s the same age as us, Pat.” Virgil looks from Patton to Logan then back again.

“And you just met him today.” Virgil looks at the carpet. “....Yes.”

“Virge, you know I love you, and trust you with my life, but how well do you really know this guy?”

“Well enough that I told him about Dee.” 

That makes the room go silent, and Virgil pushes on before he loses his nerve. “And we’ve been talking all day and getting to know each other. I actually uh... invited him over... for dinner...?” Patton blinks, trying to fight back a smile. “Really.” 

“Yeah...” 

“Well, where is he then?” Logan takes a step forward. Virgil nods and opens the front door, leaning out into the hallway and calling out. “Hey dude you can come in, they won’t kill you.” Patton opens his mouth to say something when Roman walks into the room and Logan of all people cuts him off. 

“Roman Prince?”

“Logan Barry?”

Patton and Virgil share a confused look. “You know him, Lo?”

Logan nods, still staring at Roman slightly wide-eyed. “He was my college roommate.” 

A grin almost instantly splits Patton’s face. “Well! The more the merrier!” Virgil would bring up the fact that Patton just decided to trust Logan and not him, but honestly he’s just glad this worked out okay. 

“So, what’s for dinner tonight, Padre?” Virgil snrks at the nickname and Patton positively beams.

“Pasta!” 

A/N: Well this one definitely did not write itself.

I blame this on the fact that I waited until midnight to start on it and I’m tired. 

I realize I’m giving you all these little hope nuggets when you already know what’s going to happen, and honestly I’m not sorry at all, I’m horrible.

Hopefully this is okay!

Taglist:  @metaphoricalpluto2 @bunny222

[onelovewonderwoman]

sap || part ii/ii || peter parker x reader

heyooooooo part two of prom!! this ones just more funny and light hearted, happy ending, blah blah blah. just read to your hearts content!!

tags : @running-outta-time @i-just-wanna-run-hell @munalisax @blossombarnes @sammie-blogs @baka-chanismyname @kawaiianime03 @skymoonandstardust

words : 1563

Part i

Masterlist

---------------------------

You’d spent all of Sunday, after the prom had happened, anxious and waiting for Monday to finally make an appearance.

What Spider-Man had said to you that night made you rethink all of what feelings you thought Peter had towards you; especially since you were 95.8% sure it was him underneath the webslinger’s mask.

‘What would I say to him anyway?,’ you spent your time over the weekend thinking, “Hey, I know you’re a mutant spider guy and that you may have some feelings for me or something. How was your weekend?”

Maybe it wouldn’t be the best approach, which is why you improvised when you’d walked up to the lean boy at his locker on another dreary, rainy day,

“Hey, Peter, what’s up, my dude?”

Your eyes widened at your own words, smiling open mouthed and nervously when Peter turned around and gave you a questionable look, “Nothing much, my… dudette.”

You nodded once before turning around to leave as your face began to turn a furious red, only to be stopped by Peter grabbing onto your wrist and pulling you back to face him, “Listen, Y/N,” he interlaced his hand with yours, looking straight into your eyes, “I really want to say sorry, for, you know, the other day. That wasn’t cool, I shouldn’t have bailed on you like that.”

You let out a loud, nervous laugh, earning looks from bystanders and confusion from Peter, “What’s…, what’s going on with you?”

You look down at your interlocked hands, noticing a small, black bracelet peaking from underneath his sweater sleeve. Your head quickly shot up to face him again as you squeaked, “Nothing!”

“Y/N…,”

“I’m fine!” You let go of Peter’s hand, slowly beginning to back away from the boy, “Everything’s fine, Peter-Man!”

Your eyes widened even larger at your words, speaking even louder as you corrected yourself, “Peter, you the Man! Yeah, that’s what I meant. Peter, you the Man, ‘cause it takes a man to apologize, ya know?”

You laughed nervously again as you accidentally knocked shoulders with someone passing by, “Catch ya later, Webslinge - I mean amazing English speaker! ‘Cause you speak the English language really well!”

You turned away from the boy, who’d been baffled by your strange behaviour, and speed walked to your next class.

You’d managed to ignore Peter the first half of the day, even in English class, where you’d watched a pointless video because of the project having already been finished just before prom.

Lunch hour, however, came to a start, and a you found yourself cornered by a chatty Ned before you could make your way anywhere other than the cafeteria.

“So,” you walked with Ned to the cafeteria, the boy not letting you leave, “Why didn’t you come to the prom? I mean, I know about the whole Peter thing, but I really missed you there, and so did MJ…, well as much as she can miss someone.”

“I just wasn’t up for it,” the two of you sat at the usual table, having yet to see Peter make an appearance, “I wasn’t even that excited anyways, it’s just a stupid little dance.”

“That’s not what the tears on Saturday night say.” Michelle spoke up from the far side of the table, eyes never leaving her book.

You stared at the girl in disbelief before being cut out of your trance when a new body sat down next to Ned,

“Hey,” you looked over to see that Peter was talking to you, eyebrows raised in both amusement and care, “Are you okay? I don’t really know what was happening this morning, but I know it wasn’t normal for you.”

You nodded vigorously, “I’m fine, Spider-Ma- you have long legs like a spider, man!” You shot up from your seat, “Yeah, that’s why you run pretty well now. ‘Cause of your daddy long legs!”

Both boys stared at you wide eyed in confusion, Ned seeing the first to speak up, “Y/N… are you okay?”

You nodded, eyes just as wide as the boys’.

“You know,” Peter stood from his seat just as you had, “May really wouldn’t mind; maybe we should just skip third and fourth and go to your place.”

You shook your head, smiling nervously, “Really, I’m fine, hero - heroine! The Dark Heroine, I’ve been reading the shit out of that book. Michelle,” you shouted at the girl, making her look up in discontent and bored ness, “Great book, you should try it sometime.”

The girl squinted in annoyance before turning back, making you turn to face Peter and Ned once again,

“Okay,” Peter clapped his hands, “We’re going home. Ned, text me the homework for today.”

Peter didn’t give you any time to protest, simply grabbing onto your arm and leading you out of the cafeteria after a final thumbs up from Ned.

“Peter,” you said once you made it out the doors of the school, “I’m telling you, I’m fine!”

He gave you a bored look, sighing as he stopped when you did, letting go of your arm. His face suddenly changed into one of hurt and regret, “Is this about the prom? I mean, you’ve avoided me all day in school today; you didn’t even throw a paper ball at the back of my head like you usually do when we watch a video in English.”

It’s true. Ever since the third week of the project, after you’d thrown a paper ball to get his attention away from Ned to yourself, you found yourself doing it ever since.

“No,” you sighed, “It’s not that…, not entirely.”

“Then what is it? Y/N, I’m your…, friend, you know you can trust me.”

“I don’t know, it’s just, the other night, when you guys were at prom,” you paused for a moment, “I went out. There was this guy, he was really drunk, and he almost…, you know.”

Peter feigned shock at your revelation, uttering, “Oh, wow. God, what happened?”

“Spider-Man saved me.”

“Wow, that Spider-Man guy, a great man, huh? I actually met him, ‘cause of the Stark internship. Solid dude.” Peter spoke, voice wavering as he looked down at his shoes ever so often.

You shook your head, “Don’t flatter yourself, Parker, you still ditched me for Liz Allan,” you found yourself going on an unexpected tangent, “and to make it even better; you didn’t even stay to be with the girl you’ve always wanted to be with! And those thing you said! What did you mean when you said you feel guilty and probably rather be there with me? Do you know how confused you’ve made me for the past two days-,”

“Wait,” Peter cut you off, hands grabbing onto your shoulders, “How do you know about,” his voice lowered, “Spider-Man?”

“You didn’t ask for my address,” you shrugged before your pent up annoyance had rekindled, “But don’t try to change the subject! I’ve spent numerous amount of months dreaming of the day we’d be together in some way, a week planning for prom, a night crying over being rejected, and the other crying over confusion!”

Peter smiled gently at you, head turning to the side, “You really like me that much?”

“Duh,” you squinted in annoyance, “What, do you have a brain the size of a spider too?”

“Ouch,” Peter flinched, “But I’m gonna let that one slide ‘cause I haven’t been any better.”

The hands that had been on your shoulders began to move, allowing Peter to wrap his arms around you to pull you into a hug.

“I like you that much too,” Peter mumbled into your hair as he’d buried his face into it, “I’m sorry for being an ass on Friday.”

“What about Liz?” Your arms sling loosely around Peter’s waist, face buried in his chest, “If you like me so much, why did you ditch me for her?”

“I mean I’ve always had a thing for Liz, and I can’t say I’ve gotten over it,” he said, making you look up at him, mouth opening to protest until he spoke over you, “But I spent so much time with you, I started to fall for you without actually realizing it; and I knew I was when I saw you on prom night, just being…, you. I’m glad I was there to help you get away from that sick guy, but I shouldn’t have been there in the first place. Neither should have you. You should’ve been at the prom with me, dancing with me. You shouldn’t have been at home sad, all because I was such a stupid ass for letting you slip by me like that. I’m sorry for hurting you.”

“Oh, that’s a speech only a hero could make,” you laughed before biting your lip, looking into the boy’s doe eyes, “Thanks for saving me, Spider-Man; and thanks for being one of the biggest saps I will ever come across.”

“Yeah, hopefully the only one.”

Your mouth formed a grin, leaning up to plant a soft kiss on the boy’s lips. After your lips parted, you leaned back and looked into his eyes once more, “You did it again, sap.”

Peter rolled his eyes, letting out a throaty chuckle before grabbing your hand and leading you back into the school, only to have you shout in the halls,

“I’m dating Peter Parker, resident sap!”

[natasha-cole]

Ready Steady 3: Oh, Baby

A Ready Steady Oneshot

Summary: Reader tells Rob the big news! Will he react in true Rob fashion?

Word Count: 2732

Warnings: fluff and a grumpy reader

Note: I feel like this is turning back into a chapter fic instead of a series of oneshots. Help! I don’t know how to structure this!

Rob did not have a great history with reacting well to major life changes. Then again, you didn't have a great history with breaking the news to him gently.

You weren't sure what you were expecting when you asked him how he felt about having another baby, but you figured he'd at least realize you were asking because it was already very much real.

“Why are you thinking about more kids? He asked. “We can barely keep up with the one we have. Not to mention we are both so busy, there's no way I'm on board with this.”

“Really? So having more kids is one hundred percent not even a thought in your mind?” The fact that he was even saying this sort of caught you off-guard.

“No. I'm perfectly happy with you and Jackson. Our family is complete right now. Don't you think so?”

“I mean, I thought we'd have more kids eventually. I thought you wanted more.”

“Honey, you and our son are all I need,” he said. He moved in closer to you, letting his arm drape over your body. “Where is this coming from anyway? You have baby fever or something?”

“No, I just… I wasn't asking if you wanted to have more children…” you stopped short, turning your head to look directly at him. “I asked how you felt about the fact that we are having another baby.”

“What?”

“I'm pregnant, Rob.” You felt your chest tighten as you broke the news to him. You honestly never considered that it would be such a big deal. You had talked about more kids in the future, maybe not this soon, but it was never something that seemed to be completely off the table with the two of you. Right now, you wondered if you had thought wrong. Maybe Rob really didn’t want more kids. Maybe you would just continue to disappoint him.

“Shut up. That's not funny,” he smiled awkwardly at you, obviously trying to determine if you were joking or not.

“It's not,” you replied, “and it's also not a joke.”

“You're messing with me. You were on birth control because we both decided to not let this happen again.”

“I may have forgotten my birth control a few times,” you whispered.

He moved away from you now, lying on his back as he ran his hands through his hair, sighing heavily the same way he always did when you managed to frustrate him. You watched him, waiting for the inevitable blow up, the argument that always came along with your history of dropping bombshells on him.

You gave him a moment to take it in, noticing that he wasn’t losing his cool just yet. Instead; he seemed to be carefully choosing his words now before he spoke.

“Okay,” he breathed out finally. He removed his hands from his hair, turning to look at you again. “You’re sure?”

“I’m sure,” you responded. “I’ve been ignoring the way I’ve been feeling, but I took a test and it was positive.”

“Alright, have you made an appointment to see the doctor yet?”

“No, I just found out earlier tonight.”

“Okay,” he said again, “we’ll call your doctor tomorrow and make an appointment, just to be sure.”

“Yeah,” you mumbled, “you’re not yelling at me.”

“Why would I yell at you?”

“You literally went on this tangent about how we couldn’t have another baby and then I just dropped this on you. The last time I told you I was pregnant, I thought for sure we were done. I thought you were going to leave me and never look back.”

“That was different, Y/N. We were a mess back then.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Of course I’m not. Things have been busy, I don’t blame you for maybe having forgotten to take your pill every day.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose.”

“I know you didn’t,” he laughed. “Honey, it’s okay. I’m not mad at you. Freakin out… maybe a little. But I’m not angry.”

You nuzzled against him. “I wasn't expecting this either, and thank you for not being mad at me.”

“Shit,” he mumbled, “I can’t believe we’re having another baby.”

You glanced up at him, still not convinced that he wasn’t mad. “I wouldn’t blame you for being pissed, you know?”

“I’m not,” he promised, “all I’m thinking about is what it’s going to be like having two kids so close in age. We will literally have a baby and a toddler at the same time.”

“It’s going to get a little crazy around here, isn’t it?”

“More so than usual,” he laughed.

“We’ll be okay, right?”

“Of course we will,” he looked down to meet your gaze, “we always are. Hey, we’ll figure it out okay. We did talk about more kids at some point, it’s just happening a lot sooner rather than later.”

“You’re pretty great,” you said.

“Husband of the year I guess.”

“You should probably get on calling your doctor,” Rob pointed out when you walked into the kitchen the next morning. You grumpily ignored him, immediately going for the coffee that had lured you from bed. You poured a cup, adding cream and sugar as you looked over to him. He was in the middle of feeding Jackson and he had stopped to give you a look, his eyebrow raised in protest over what you were doing.

“What?” You mumbled.

“Coffee?” He asked as he returned his focus to Jackson.

“Oh god,” you muttered. You stared down at your coffee, heartbroken now that you realized you couldn’t enjoy it now that you for sure knew you were pregnant. “Nice knowing you,” you said softly as you poured it down the sink.

Rob chuckled from his spot, “I’ll make you breakfast,” he said as he got up. You trudged over to Jackson, not sure how you would be able to function now that coffee was out the door for you. You took over feeding the baby, Rob moving to get breakfast started in the kitchen. You felt a little queasiness, realizing that you were starving.

“No bacon, please,” you said out loud.

“Trust me,” Rob scoffed, “I’m not going down that road again.”

You smiled, now trying to encourage Jackson to eat some of the fruit that Rob had put out for him. He mostly laughed as he tossed pieces of his food to the ground, entertained at the way you bent down to retrieve it all.

“How are you feeling anyway?” Rob asked, looking sort of concerned. He obviously started thinking back to your pregnancy with Jackson. It had been terrible. You were constantly sick, almost dangerously sick.

“I’m feeling okay,” you said, “a little nauseated, but I’m not throwing my guts up yet.”

“Really, you need to call your doctor.”

“I’ll do it later,” you replied. You smiled at Jackson, still handing him food that he only threw onto the floor. “Someone’s done eating.”

You quickly scooped him up, giving him kisses as he laughed at you. You placed him down, watching as he started to walk around. He was busy, that’s for sure. He hated sitting still, and he hated being held for too long. You frowned when you considered the idea of having two little one with all of this energy and personality. You were tired most of the time as it was, you really couldn’t imagine what it was going to be like with another baby.

“I’m just saying, Y/N. Maybe if you catch it soon enough, we can avoid all of that again.”

“Okay, okay,” you replied. You kept your eyes on Jackson as he headed for the living room, now finding toys to play with and bang against the floor. You grabbed your phone, searching for the number to  your doctor’s office. You spoke loudly to the receptionist, trying to be heard over all the noise Jackson was making. You let the woman know that you took a test that came back positive and just wanted to get confirmation. She asked you to hold for a moment and you listened to the music on the other end of the phone. You kept your eyes on Jackson, laughing as he moved on to the remote which went directly into his mouth. Rob was still busy in the kitchen, and before long, the woman was back on the phone with you. She told you there had been a cancellation today and she fit you in this afternoon. You gladly accepted, pleased that you were able to be seen so quickly.

When you hung up, you grabbed Jackson to carry him with you back into the kitchen, not daring to leave him unattended for even a second.

“I’ve got an appointment this afternoon,” you told Rob. Jackson was already trying to push himself out of your arms, whining as he tried to get back to what he was doing.

“Good. At least we’ll get an idea of how far along you are and hopefully your doc has some ideas on how to prevent you from getting so sick this time.”

“Hmm, whatever you say babe.”

“Want us to tag along?” Rob asked, talking about him and Jackson.

“Oh god no,” you muttered. “No offense, I’d love to have you there, but I don’t think Jack would enjoy it very much.”

“Fair enough,” he replied.

After breakfast, you took your time getting ready for the day. It seemed as if your symptoms had gotten worse once you saw that positive pregnancy test. You weren’t throwing up yet, and you were grateful for that. But you felt exhausted and grumpy. Rob had brought you in for a kiss at one point this morning, holding you for a bit. It would have been fairly romantic, except the feeling of him breathing on your neck seemed to annoy you. You knew your hormones were already acting up. Just the idea of bacon in the morning had your stomach turning and everything that Rob did seemed to annoy you. You sort of felt relief that you would be seeing your doctor alone today, maybe now you’d avoid letting everything bother you.

As your appointment time drew closer, you finally decided to actually dress for the day. Rob joined you in the bedroom, getting dressed as well.

“Where are you going?” You joked. Today was supposed to be a lazy day. You didn’t originally have plans, you just meant to hang out as a family at home, which didn’t require anyone to get too presentable.

“With you, of course,” Rob said, giving you a confused look.

“I really don’t want to bring Jack to the doctors with us,” you protested, feeling slightly annoyed. Just then, there was a knock at the door. Rob pulled his shirt over his head and made his way out to answer the door.

“That’s the sitter,” he said.

“Really? A sitter?”

“Relax, it’s my sister.”

He disappeared from the room and you rolled your eyes over his insistence on joining you. It shouldn’t have been so annoying, after all, it was his baby too. You were sure that he wanted to be there when you found out how far along you were. He probably even hoped there’d be an ultrasound so you could get a glimpse at your new little one. You should be grateful to have a husband who wanted to be involved, even if this was all unplanned as usual. You hoped your hormones would fix themselves and maybe you’d stop being so irritated with him over stupid things.

Your doctor had you take a pretty basic pregnancy test; one that came back just as positive as the little stick on Halloween.

“Well, you are pregnant,” she stated cheerily when she returned with the results, “congrats you two.”

Rob grinned at you, and you couldn’t help but chuckle at how he suddenly seemed pretty thrilled at the idea of a new baby.

“If you’re certain about the information you gave me, I think you’re about three weeks along. We’ll schedule you for another a prenatal next month, you’ll be about eight weeks by then.”

“We don’t got to see or hear anything this time?” Rob asked.

“There’s not much to see yet,” she laughed, “we won’t hear a heartbeat until your next appointment.”

“Oh,” he mumbled.

“You already have a kid, right?” She asked sarcastically, looking at you both as if you hadn’t ever been pregnant before.

“Yeah, we do. Poor Robbie here missed out on all the stuff at the beginning of that one.”

“Okay, that’s okay. This will be exciting for you to be involved through the entire pregnancy then.”

Rob nodded, still smiling as he gripped your hand.

“I’ll tell you what, I promise at your appointment next month; we’ll do the whole thing. We’ll listen to the heartbeat, do an ultrasound, everything. It’s still a bit too early right now though.”

“Alright, I can wait I guess,” Rob replied.

“When I saw you during your last pregnancy, you were having some trouble with morning sickness,” she began, “are you experiencing it now.”

“Just a little,” you replied, “I’m a little queasy often, no vomiting though. I’m mostly tired a lot and really moody.”

“Should we do anything to prevent her from getting sick like that again?” Rob cut in.

“I’d recommend just sticking to a simple diet. Make sure you eat as soon as you wake up and eat often. Basically stick to what was recommended last time, but I don’t think we need to be too cautious yet. Every pregnancy is different, and maybe you’ll just have normal morning sickness for this one. Just keep an eye on it.”

“Thank you,” you replied.

“I’m gonna let you go. Make sure to set up an appointment before you leave and I’ll see you soon.”

She left you and Rob alone; both of you looking at each other as if to try to gauge the other’s thoughts over all of this.

“I guess it’s official then,” you said.

“Yeah,” he chuckled.

“You okay?”

“I’m good, Y/N. Honestly. We’ll be okay.”

“What are you thinking right now?”

“I’m actually sort of excited,” he laughed, “I know I reacted as if I didn’t want this, but I think now that it’s for sure, I’m okay with it.”

“Me too. I was a little pissed when I realized it at first, but I’m kinda excited too.”

“I love you,” he said as he leaned in for a kiss. “I love you and our little family.”

“You’re the best husband, and our kids are so lucky to have you as their dad.”

When you returned home, you watched as Rob nervously thanked his sister for hanging out with Jackson. You could tell that he so badly wanted to let her in on the news, but you had managed to convince him to wait.

Things between the two of you during your pregnancy with Jackson had been so difficult. Everything was a mess; that fortunately, had worked out in the end. This time, you wanted to really take your time with everything. You explained how you wanted to just wait until you were a bit further along, maybe after you actually got to see your new baby and hear its heartbeat first. Right now, you had Rob in your life and there was no need to be stressed and panicked during this. You weren’t on your own during any of this.

You had told him that you wanted to do a proper announcement later on. He had smiled at the ideas you threw out there. You considered doing a photo announcement on social media. Maybe you could announce it at one of the conventions. You discussed whether it would be best to tell close friends and family first before letting fans in on the news; or if it would be more fun tell everyone all at once.

You had both laughed and talked the entire way home, feeling pretty good about the idea of having another baby. For once, you realized that despite everything that had happened in the past between you; he really was here for the long haul. Things that may have blown up in your face before were no longer huge issues now that you were married and happy. No matter what life threw at you, you really were in it together.

Tag List: @tas898, @wolfyangel-is-a-pluviophile, @narisjournal-blog, @dont-hate-relate-pls, @waywardswain, @nerdyforyourbooks, @perksofbeingafangirl26, @crowley-you-sinnamon-roll, @pepperwoodatnight, @idk-fandom @please-stop-killing-dean, @b-northington, @sclerafantrash, @itsilvermorny, @jannalionheart, @feelmyroarrrr, @capital-eyyyy-ohhh, @prlncess-nuala, @nekodresden85, @thebookisbtr, @internationalfandomgirl, @smoothdogsgirl, @chantelle-c333. @emilywells19 @laffytaffyhumor @lucifersxvessel @thefelinemedia78 @onlyanothersocialcasualty @typicalweirdbookworm @littleshone @a-queen-and-her-throne @fandooomqueenforyou @spnackleholicswainer  @soythedemonqueen @girl-next-door-writes @destielschild @fangirl1855  @your-not-invisible-to-me @bea789  @a-michellerae-things   @multi-fan-dom-madness  @winchestergirl-13   @ncisgothchick @simplycheyenneautumn @ourloveisforthelovely  @camelotandastronauts  @jpadjackles  @devilgirlsarah

[heroes-writing]

Omg! You're back😆! I'm so glad you are, how have you been? I am honestly so excited to see you are writing!❤️❤️ Can I request a scenario where Saitama and his S/O are out doing the groceries or something and his S/O gets all riled up at something some random guys said and they end up in this awkward (yet funny) and embarrassing situation? Thank you so much😘😋

I’ve had a crazy year since I left! But I’m well now! 8D 

I hope this is okay lol, the idea I went with came out of left field, and I’m writing at 6am. Please enjoy!

Word Count: 1873

As you and Saitama grew as a couple, you experienced a lot offirsts together.

You were his first kiss, and he was the first guy you sawtruly and properly butt naked.

Only Saitama knew of your secret love for French fries dippedin chocolate pudding, and you knew just how ticklish he was between his thighs.

Saitama was your first long-term relationship, your first love…and while loving each other was something you both found absurdly easy. Youoften heeled your desires to conform to what others expected out of yourrelationship since the way you loved each other worked so well.

It’s a long story, but you knew Saitama before he startedtraining to become a hero, back when he still lived in that crappy apartmentcomplex filled to the brim with crooked people.

The two of you hung out at each other’s apartments for thelongest time, you spent the night often, squeezing next to each other on yoursingle futons and often laughing at how cramped it was.

Those plush shikibuton’s were all well and good, but it wastime for the two of you to move up in the world.    

Since Saitama’s home was too small, you decided (pretty muchon your own) that you would invest in a proper bed. You wanted at least, aqueen size mattress that the two of you could sleep in when you were at yourplace.

It was around Midday when you made your way to the huge mattressoutlet in H city. Big signs were plastered all over the storefront screaming “SALE”and “LOW PRICES GAUREENTEED”. It put Saitama at ease since he was a huge suckerfor saving money.

As you walked up the steps you continued your conversationwith your bald boyfriend—he was trying to tell you that he once fell asleep whilefighting a 4 eyed pillow monster.

“I guess in the end, you don’t mind what you sleep on huh?”You giggled as he held open the door for you.

“I could sleep anywhere I think.” He shrugged, and followedyou into the air-conditioned megastore in his usual nonchalant manner.

To your immediate right, a tall sales representative smiledat you, and only you.

“Hello miss—“ His voice was rather oily, and it made youinwardly wince. He stepped up to you real close, his tall height putting you atedge, “Looking for anything particulartoday?”

Almost out of second nature your hand shot out to the spaceSaitama always occupied at your side. You tugged him close without even lookingat him, till you could feel his heat at your hip and his hand settled against yourback.

Now that he was properly into frame so to speak—you forcefullyexpanded the world view of the man talking to you.

For some reason people pointedly ignored Saitama’s existence,and it irritated you to no end.

“Yes, my boyfriend andI—“ you raised your eyebrows assertively, “Are looking for a queen sizedmattress.”

In tandem, you and Saitama stared and smiled in a picturesquemanner.

The oily man snapped his eyes between the two of you, andobviously didn’t know what to think. Saitama looked like an average joe, so youcouldn’t be after him for money to buy you expensive things.

Was it pity?

After a moment of pause where he wisely chose to not say anyof his theories, he offered a confident hand towards the back of the store, “Rightthis way, please~”

Eh, he was still giving you the creeps.  

“Care to tell me the price range you’re going for today?”

You really didn’t have too much of an idea, “I’m not surewhat beds go for these days actually. We both have used Futons since getting ourown places...”

He hummed, “I see I see! I’ll keep that in mind for what Ishow you today!”

With a shake of your head, the two of you looked to the salesassociate as he took the lead. He seemed like he wanted to either gouge you ofyour money, or hover around to make sure you didn’t damage anything.

Oblivious to it all Saitama smirked to himself, “We’relooking for the cheapest mattress you’ve got!”—and you recoiled.

“Nooo, we’relooking for a regular mattress, to INVESTin. I’ll pay whatever!” You clutched onto Saitama’s arm tightly to remind himof what you had already told him before. The mattress would have to last thetwo of you for YEARS before you got another.

You served him your biggest pout and he wilted under it as healways did.

“I was just joking, [Name]~” He scratched his cheek with hisdark eyes darting away from your own quickly.

“That’s the thing, you are not joking! I know your game Tama!” You tutted.

“…Did you two just recently get together?” The Sales Repchuckled to himself, “You two have a freshly hatched love bird vibe aheehee~”

“Um…” You looked at Saitama thoughtfully, “It’s been around 4years actually?” You weren’t the greatest with dates, and you looked to yourboyfriend’s doughy face for help.

His eyebrows tented, “It’s been that long huh?”

You nodded, “Well it was around my birthday when we gottogether. I know that much.” You gave him a knowing look and a sweet smile thatmade him tug you a little closer.

The sales rep stammered to a halt, “A-Ah—4 years? You surefooled me!”

You tried to play along for his benefit, “I guess we stilllook like a new couple?”

He laughed, but his expression was strained, “Don’t you thinkit’s time for you to get married? Or maybe move on from each other? Your manneeds to make a move before you get swept away by someone else~”

Oh goodness, he was not giving you a flirty look.

Was he implying you should break up with Saitama??

Did he mention marriage???

To Saitama’s wonderful credit, he did not freak out, and hedidn’t miss a beat.

“Ah I guess I should ask [Name] eventually. We’re basicallymarried anyways.” He said bluntly—as you blushed and sputtered.

One half of your heart was so utterly moved by Saitama’swords, and the other was flaring to the bait the Sales rep had placed at thelatter half of his sentence. Would you have to hang all over Saitama for him totake a hint??

“Tama…” Was all you could manage, as the Sales Rep finishedleading you to a corner of the store filled with discounted beds.

“Ah, I didn’t want discount!“ You began to bite off acomplaint before Saitama ooh’d at thenearest plush bed (conveniently 50% off) and fell into it.

“This one is comfy.”

You sighed in defeat, your tone softening, “I guess I’m notpicky either but..” You crossed your arms and implored to his prone body, “Wehave to find a bed that can take a beating you know?”

Monsters tended to gravitate to your man, you knew that much.If your house got wrecked you wanted to be able to salvage your bed from therubble and still use it, damnit!

The Sales Rep sat down on a neighboring mattress as youstood, STILL wanting to get out of the discounted section—The man only chuckledhaughtily as he pinned you with a knowing wink.

“Aheehee! That’s a new one dear, but I know just the thing!”

“Huh?” What was he saying? Did he have an extra durablemattress for sale? You got your hopes up for just a moment, before his nextwords bewildered you further.

“You two won’t want a spring mattresses, they make far toomuch noise! Foam will allow you get down and dirty without the neighborshearing. I’m also sure you won’t make a dent in memory foam even if you get toowild aheehee!”

…

You went dead silent. Dead still. Brain waves stalled into stagnantlines.

Saitama sat up on the mattress, like a vampire out of acoffin, a confused expression on his face.

“What?” You both squawked.

“Oh!” The man raised a hand to his mouth, scandalized, “Forgiveme if you two are, perhaps not yet sexually involved--YET! I just figured, 4years—Oh don’t worry! Silly me!” The Sales rep was trying to play some ditzycharacter as he laughed to himself at your expense.

“That’s not—we- we—“

“Waiting for marriage maybe! I get it, really! But goodnessyou two have such self-control to be sleeping side by side~”

He turned to Saitama, the first time he focused on him sinceyou both walked into the store.

“Sir, we need to find you a mattress that you can break inwith your girlfriend here! It’s the least I can do~ I can even give you a fewtips for your first time together.”

You didn’t want to sayit!

Your firsts clenched into balls of irritation. To admit thatyou and Saitama weren’t huge virgins to this man was nasty, but your pride waskilling you—You loved Saitama with all your heart, you seriously adored him, andsome people just made assumptions off the cuff cuz they were—

Extremely stupid? Or rude?

BOTH??

“Sir, I’ll haveyou know, my boyfriend and I bone a ridiculous amount!!” Your voice was louder than you expected to bein the cave like store. It echoed and reverberated, and what little sound therewas from other customers hushed to listen to your incoming tangent.

“[NAME]!!” Sputtered Saitama, shocked, with a little bit ofblush on his cheeks.

“It’s true!” You insisted, “I don’t know where YOU get offMr.—“ You finally took a gander at his name tag, “Burei! But I need to make onething clear—my boyfriend and I need this mattress for SLEEPING, not JUST OURRAMPANT SEX LIFE, so I don’t want a discounted BED, and I want it durable ANDstain resistant! PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!”

.-.-.-.-.

…Next thing you knew, you and Saitama were sitting outside afew streets over. Your butt’s squat on the curb as you hid your face in yourknees.

“I’M usually the one who gets kicked out of stores [Name]!”Saitama, with a very amused smile on his face cracked open a perspiring soda hegot from a vending machine. He set your can down in front of you as you shiedaway.

You were rather ashamed of yourself, and embarrassed. “…Hewas really pissing me off—“ Just the thought of that man’s face was making youseethe.

“I could tell.” He chuckled good naturedly.

His arm curls around your shoulders in a sweet gesture. It’swarm, familiar, and comforting.

“Why don’t we just stick to Futons? We can splurge on a bigone and get a dozen pillows. Then just keep it at your place like we wanted.”

..You tried to hide your grin at his thoughtfulness. Theblooming of love in your chest made you sway into Saitama. You kissed his cheekgratefully as you picked your head up from your slump.

“Okay…Butonly if we can break it in as soon as we get home~”

He choked on his drink.

[shadowlink720]

FE: Birthright Randomised Prologue, Chapter 1 and Chapter 2

(aka ‘I can’t believe Shadow is freaking Dead’)

ok Are you ready for this? I’m sure not but let’s mcfreaking go I’m gonna go on a lot of tangents probably so please forgive me for that---

oooooooook so let’s see if this actually works (I haven’t actually tested it yet, but it loaded instead of hanging at a black screen so I’m assuming it does), let’s also see if it breaks the game or not b/c I’ve heard that Birthright can so therefore Conquest is more reliable but I never want to play Conquest ever again holy heck I don’t have a physical copy of Conquest ayyyy

But enough stalling! Let’s get right to it! Ah jeez I really want to give Corrin the really short hair I did when I branched off to Revelation but I want to keep the SYMBOLISM-

.... a lot of these pictures are gonna be squint ahah (also it’s Samurai b/c I need Astra lmao)

ok then let’s goooooo

I suppose I should be worried that the ‘No’ option doesn’t show properly but w/e (the button is blank lol)

........ Azura could you build the suspence any higher ahahahah;;;;;;

OH MY GOD IT WORKED

TAKUMI REPLACED HINOKA I’M GOING TO D I E And he’s a Diviner lmao no Fujin Yumi for u m8 I hope that the Ryoma and Takumi replacements can/will use Raijinto and Fujin Yumi lol ohhh my farore I am actually shaking aaaaahhh give me a minute ahahh--- this is so surreal is this actually happening I don’t even kno w ANYWAY

Takumi are you saying ‘How dare you!?’ to the Nohrian for trying to attack me or me for not knowing how to dodge-

also I’m going to skip enemy/ally phases so there aren’t any spoilers >:3c

ok I know it’s for stability’s sake, but Takumi with the Sky Knight class looks like he has short hair-

OH MY GOFD

woops I could have taken a better one uagiuagdfudgh RYOMA IS REPLACED WITH AZURA I’M DYI N G IT’S WORSE THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THE ROOM NEXT TO ME WHO CAN PROBABLY HEAR MY LAUGHING THO HECK

ah yeah since it’s Birthright then the Nohrian siblings won’t get randomised for stability :V

wait Felici a is tAKUMI FELICIA IS TAKUMI WE DON’T NEED TO PLAY IT ANY FURTHER THIS IS THE PINNACLE HOLY HYLIA

ohhh my gosh Sakura is replaced with Mozu aaaaaahhhhh that’s adorable auhfiughdfysdgf

OH YM GOD

Ryoma is Yukimura I’m This playthrough is going to end me tbh---

I don’t think I’m ever going to get over Felicia being Takumi and Azura being Ryoma tbh holy heck

also I really hope Felicia turns out to be a class that can use bows so that she could possibly have Fujin Yumi idk how it works tho ahahahhhh;;;;;;

I’m not getting over this, I can’t wait to see more of Felicia being passive aggressive/throwing the extreme SALT around

Azura, Takumi just asked if u were alright, I don’t really think humming is gonna help u with answering him-

Azura, High Princess of NoChill-shido

aaaand more vanilla sibliings (I’m sorry, I didn’t have the courage to try to get Revelation to work-)

It’s at times like this when you realise just how different Hinoka and Takumi are when it comes to acting towards u at the start asfhiudfsiudh

WELP ANYWAY that concludes the Proloooogue, time to get right into Chapter 1 aaaaaah

also this is what I was talking about with the button being blank ahahahh;;;;

time to see Felicia and Jakob’s replacements ayyyy OH MY GOD

Felicia is now an Oni Savage Hana holy heck- JAKOB IS KAZE I’M GOING TO DI E

OH MY GOD Flora asked Hana if she’d help w/ waking Corrin up and Hana’s voiceline was just ‘No’ aioasdfudfhsudfs I think I’m going to do Chapter 2 as well seeing as basically nothing will be different this chapter b/c I ain’t doing Conquest ahahah;;;

I always seem to forget how tutorial heavy fe games are, but especially in Fates :’’’’D ayyyy first level up! ..... I only got hp! :’’’’’’’’D yikes that was an awful level up audgaiufhaduf do the growth rates change for Corrin? idek ahahah (no they don’t seem to)

anyway hope ur ready to Die, Xander if not then.................. well this is Birthright ayyyy lmao

aaanyway we don’t need to see this cutscene we’ve already seen it before many tiiiimes because it’s exactly the saaaaaaaaaame but there’s Leo with his inside out collar again lmao there’s a tag on it and everything that’s cute

You know what I realised the other day though??? A unit’s clothing can get ripped in this game, idk what causes it tho, probably getting low on HP, and it’s certainly not fixed magically w/ healing it’s a funny little detail idek

lmao bye Hana we won’t see u again for a whiiiile ahahh;;;;

onto Chapter 2! :D (I love this so far ngl, oh my Farore)

So! who are the Hoshidan prisoners!? >:D oh yeah we have to see Ganon- GARON, first asjhifadufa Dragon Veins, Ganglari, magic from Valla, yadda yadda yaddaaaaa PRISONERS!

..........oh my Farore-

Kaze don’t be mean >:V I mean.... yeah tea sounds great right now but THAT DOESN’T MATTER U were in their position once, in an alternate universe :Y

........................... Holy Hylia-

...... So does this mean I can call Jakob a grill he certainly does roast ppl a lot in the original-

WHAT ARE THE ODDS

THAT RINKAH REPLACES KAZE- it was really funny tho, when Corrin said ‘Huh? Have you heard of me?’ Rinkah just said nothing, but her mouth was open and her voice line was ‘What?’ so I’m just imagining her like ‘Bitch, I am Hurt’

yeah yeah Dragon Vein tutorial and all that I GET IT- Let’s look at Kaze’s stats and skills! >:D

...... Holy shit he’s a monster

His personal skill is Collector, which is super neat because hey! free stuff! :D He also has Seal Magic which could be good with his terrible less than stellar Resistance, and Good Fortune, which restores up to 20% HP EACH TURN, well.... based on his luck stat, which is..... pretty bad lmao- maybe he has a really good Luck stat growth idk (I peeked at the output file after having played the chapter and his stat growths are HP = 15, Str = 30, Mag = 35, Skill = 50, Spd = 25, Lck = 50, Def = 20, Res = 40, so yeah, pretty decent barring HP and Def haha;;;) But LOOK AT THAT STRENGTH HE’S A BEAST AND A C RANK IN SPEARS THAT’S FANTASTIC UGH- Kaze........ my man, I can’t wait to see what you can Heart Seal into it could probably be really cool, or..... pretty bad, idk anything could happen with this randomiser

I just realised how ironic his randomised class was; he went from a light, speed based Hoshidan class to a bulky, defence based Nohrian class ahahah;;;

but enough digressing! Let’s get started! >:D

....... Goddesses damn it Kaze, why do you have such an adorable laugh u’r gonna kill me- also don’t lie, you can’t use staves :V Anyway, I shouldn’t bother letting Gunter get experience because reasons, this is Birthright-

I’m just gonna end the turn without doing anything and see what happens, because I want them to still be paired up when they attack/still be on the healtile;;;

Rest in pieces, generic samurai.

Look at how quick these guys are to throw their lives away, how cute. Another level uuuuup 1 point to Speed and Luck, wow that’s.... not all that great, but I’m not going to have a lot of luck anyway so I should just take what I can get :V

Jakob no, it’s no use You have a club and your against a sword I mean yeah you survive but not for long m8

....... I hate to break it to ya, Jakob, buuuut

ah jeez, Corrin almost leveled up again-

Dammit Corrin, we could have finished it there and then if you had just HIT HER- no matter, she should be done now

Ayyy, level up for Kaze!

And it’s pretty darn good too! :V

I still can’t believe that Kaze replaces Jakob, like, they couldn’t be any different with how they treat people- I’m not complaining tho; means I get Kaze pretty early on >:3c ayyy he got Defence +2! :D

aww that’s the end of the Chapter ;;u;;

ooooh hey! Jakob’s a Nohr Prince and Rinkah’s a Spear Fighter! (That makes what Jakob said earlier even better lmao;;; ) I can’t wait to see Jakob turn into a mcfreaking DRAGON awwww yeeeaaaah >:3ccccc

oh yeah, Garon talking about ‘kill the Hoshidans!’ all that nonsense like, bruh. nah. I want a Nohr Prince and Spear Fighter, yo. it’s funny how Jakob still stands the way he does tho, but I can’t get a picture of it agusdasusfgha

ahhh, wheesht Xander, u idiot, you know more than anyone that there’s something definitely up with Garon and all that stuff with the vanilla Nohr siblings yadda yadda

Ok you can’t really see it, but there’s Jakob standing the way he usually does lol

Why u gotta be so r00000d it’s still oddly fitting that he’s in the place of Rinkah, tho; it’s like, what Jakob would act like towards Corrin if he hadn’t been their butler, albeit a little less passive aggressive :V

JAKOB I told u to STOP-

aww man, that’s the real end of the chapter

safjuhduhfsdufhasf I wanna play moooore but I shouldn’t make this go on too long ;;;;u;;;; So u can bet that I’ll keep going later hahahah;;;;

Sorry for the low quality images btw, I might look into getting a screenshot plugin at some point, idk I also don’t know how often I should do these, so if anyone who bothered to get this far could tell me what they would think would be best that would be really great :0