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giggles-and-freckles · 4 years

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Okay woohoo some fic recs incoming!!!! These will probably be all over the place, but I’ve just got to scream about them for a second!!! PS gonna try to do these more frequently because this is fun!!!

Click below the cut if you dare!

Declarations by Nny11

Summary: A series exploring Obi-Wan and Ahsoka's relationship as Grandmaster and Grandpadawan.

Okay, so this is one of the first fics I can genuinely remember reading with a heavy emphasis on the relationship between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka where I was like 'hey oh my god I love them?’ It was a monumental moment for me because now I am so obscenely ride or die for them and I truly do think back to this fic often with utter fondness.

A moment I loved:

“From a certain point of view,” he finally conceded, motioning her to start again. “At least I know you’ve learned something from me!”

“Well I couldn’t learn the secrets of your hair routine!”

the flood comes rushing in by @kenobilovebot

Summary: "I have done this for you. I have put you first." Or, Anakin finds out.

A little bit of sith!Obi-Wan? As a treat? Hm, well...all right!!!!! I don’t want to say too much here because I would really prefer you read it than read any more of my mindless babbling but–it’s good.

A moment I loved:

He can hardly think around the smothering darkness that has so wholly encompassed his master, so effectively destroying the light that has always been. He’s always been able to reach for it at the worst of times. Now he can’t feel it at all.

a time to say goodbye by Sokaless

Summary: Ezra isn't the only one facing the temptation of change in the World Between Worlds. Just minutes after facing Vader, Ahsoka falls through a portal seventeen years into the past and must relive her final encounter with Anakin and Obi-Wan without drastically altering the future. But Anakin Skywalker taught her many things. How to push her luck was one of them.

This is a short and sweet time-travel fic that finds Ahsoka back in that moment in the hangar with Anakin right before they unknowingly have their last goodbye. She knows more now than she did before and struggles not to say it all. But the theme of learning from loss is really special and powerful and I feel this sad sort of closure when I finish (I say that actively because I have...read this fic several several times). Painful, poignant–all the best things.

A moment I loved:

One last thing she learned from Anakin- teaching a lesson often requires holding your student to higher standards than you hold yourself.

With the knowledge that she’s holding him to a standard she herself might never reach, Ahsoka tells Ezra, “I’m asking you to let go.”

good morning, sun by @katierosefun

Summary: “You look miserable.” Ahsoka dropped her hand, spun around. Obi-Wan stood behind her, one arm carrying a cloak and the other half-extended to Ahsoka. [or: After she leaves the Order, Ahsoka has one last encounter with Obi-Wan.]

Let’s see how many of Caroline’s fics I can get away with posting before someone reports me. This one-shot is full of all the good post-wrong jedi stuff. Soka and Obi have a conversation at Dex’s that hurts a lot but also feels real and I will never not respect Caroline for understanding the nuances of the disaster trios intricate and intimate relationships with each other and how they shift and mold around different circumstances. This feels so authentically them that it hurts.

A moment I loved:

What came out instead was a small, half-choked sound.

When Obi-Wan opened his arms, Ahsoka fell right into them. “It hurts,” Ahsoka said, her voice cracking. “A lot.”

“I know,” Obi-Wan replied thickly. “We’ll take care of it.”

You Haunt All My What-Ifs by @kckenobi

Summary: But then she saw the way Obi-Wan’s lip was quivering, and his eyes were shining, and she realized— He hadn’t called because he needed to tell her. He’d called because he needed her. “Obi-Wan,” she breathed. “Oh, Obi-Wan…” And she wanted to reach out, to hold him. To be his refuge, his shelter, his home. Instead she just watched as he shook his head, palmed at his eyes, apologized. She reached out. Touched the hologram. It flickered. — [Satine and Obi-Wan—then, now, and every echo of what if between them.]

One of the first fics that got me on my Obitine grind!! Just the right mix of angst and angst to create the perfect recipe of absolute sorrow. These characters feel so real I could reach out and hug them–and oh, how I want to after this incredible little fic.

A moment I loved:

And then suddenly she was thinking of every little what if—the other paths they could’ve taken, the millions of ways they could’ve ended up here. She imagined a future where he’d stayed. She saw white weddings, crying infants, painting nursery rhymes on a pale bedroom wall. She saw herself rolling over in the middle of the night, bumping shoulders, feeling his warm breath on her face. She saw family dinners, rushed breakfasts as they hurried the kids off to school. She saw laughter. She saw a lifetime. And at the end, she saw herself old and gray, holding his hand, his eyes the last thing she’d ever see.They had arrived at the end now. But she was not old and gray.

Dying Words by @cloudyskywars

Summary: Anakin is trapped beneath a collapsed building, and has one final conversation with Obi-Wan.

One of my favourite febuwhump contributions from within the mountain of wonderful fics that the second month of the year created!! Some good ol classic Obi & Ani pain. Hint of a deathfic...but mostly just the moments leading up to it. And they...hurt. Also!!! Melanie took the care to make Anakin’s final words be about Obi-Wan, which is very special to me for the reason she includes in her author’s note.

A moment I loved:

“And,” he said, “if you ever see Ahsoka again, tell her she was the best padawan I could have asked for.” His breaths were coming in rapid pants, now, and the room was spinning out of focus. “Obi-Wan?” he asked, voice barely audible. “Yes, Padawan mine?” he responded, his own voice shaky as well. “Thank you for being my Master,” Anakin said.

i’m only me when i’m with you idiots by @renegadeontherunn

Summary: who let Obi-Wan pick the holo? and where's the remote? they might need a bigger blanket.

[or, Anakin, Ahsoka, and Obi-Wan have leave on Coruscant and holo night is the perfect excuse to all squeeze onto a couch together, bicker, and be, well, a family]

Fluff, fluff, fluff! Yes, please! My dear Fiona does a wonderful job wrapping these three up in a blanket and plopping them in front of a holo for a night of witty banter and so-cute-I-could-melt platonic cuddles. I love these three, I love this fic!

A moment I loved:

“You met a civilized Padawan? Couldn’t have been ours.”

get home by @curse-of-men

Summary: After a mission goes wrong and Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker goes missing, it is up to Obi-Wan Kenobi and Ahsoka Tano to bring him home.

[or: a Grandmaster and a Grandpadawan go on a road trip to rescue chaos personified]

What? Me? Rec’ing another Obi-Wan and Ahsoka centric fic? HUH? Hehe, I love that Lou says this is the missing Obi & Soka arc in their author’s note because um, did they look into my heart and know that’s what I most desire? Anyway, this three-parter is incredible from start to finish and I demand you all go read it immediately. :-)

A moment I loved:

Making their way to the cockpit, Ahsoka tilts her head into Obi-Wan’s general direction and says: “You know, Master, Anakin would probably think things so far have gone excellently.” Obi-Wan returns her look and sighs.

“Now you surely must get why I am so worried about this.” Ahsoka grins and gestures back and forth in the empty space between them with one hand.

“For what it’s worth, I think we make a good enough team.”

we stand here, together by @nightdotlight

Summary: Master Depa Billaba and Padawan Caleb Dume.

Windu worries for them, out in the wider galaxy. Waging war, while he and Anakin sit here, waiting.

But he trained Billaba, and Billaba is training Dume. Anakin once took lessons from her, when he himself was a Padawan, and he knows she is skilled enough by far, to ensure that both she and her student make it back to Coruscant safely.

It’s ironic, that when cut off from the Force he can understand other people better than he has in years.

ZOWEE!!!! This fic made me ugly cry on my conference period at school!! Ha! Another fic that culminates in, er...death. But!!!! The lead-up! Ooh, baby! The writing style of this one is also very fresh and unique which I appreciate as someone who essentially reads the same thing eight million ways (by choice, mind you!!!! and loves it every time!!!!). This is just an absolute gem of a fic. Queue: your best crying playlist.

A moment I loved:

Depa, her Padawan braid hanging from her shoulder, hugs him around his middle and drags him to the training salles. The whole way, her laughter follows them– warm, like summer rain. Like the smallest, most ephemeral moments of happiness.

Her smile feels like a sunset on his back, and Mace smiles back even as they spar, as green and purple clash over and over again in a dance unique to teacher and student.

He does not need to reach out to know the galaxy is at peace. When they take a break from their own spar, Mace feels a light tap on his presence in the Force; when he turns, Ahsoka Tano stands there in training robes, her own Master a few paces behind– and beside him, Obi-Wan Kenobi, face lighter than it has been in years.

Her Padawan beads hang from her headdress; when she smiles at the banter behind her, turning to retort, they catch the light, and the half-formed impression of those beads torn asunder and held in gloved hand is dissipated by the glare.

Only Hope by @tessiete

Summary: The infamous "Year on the Run".In the wake of her father's death, Satine is assigned two Jedi to escort her safely back to Mandalore, but in the chaotic aftermath of a civil war, there is more at stake than one person's survival. Together, they work to unite Mandalore, overcome ancient grudges, and bring peace to a world ravaged by bloodshed.

Man, oh man, do I love a good year on the run fic! And man oh man am I loving the heck out of this one. It’s in progress so go ahead give it a bookmark and a subscription while you’re at it!!!! But the banter! The sass! The (I assume soon to come) pining! The Qui-Gon third wheeling! READ IT! Cannot recommend highly enough.

A moment I loved:

“...and you’re bound to be hungry.”

“I assure you, I’m not.”

“Well, Obi-Wan is,” Jinn asserts. His back is to his apprentice and so he cannot see the mutinous glance which darts his way. “And as you’ve seen, he’s trouble when he isn’t fed. You have five minutes.”

Goes to Ground by jerseydevious

Summary: Obi-Wan has a question for Anakin following his experiences on Zygerria.

Silly Jedi boys trying and failing to communicate, gosh dang it!!! They get there, eventually, though. :’) Some post Zygerria angst and some tough discussions. HERE. FOR. IT.

A moment I loved:

“You are a bad influence, padawan mine,” Obi-Wan said. He gave Anakin that smile, the one that made Anakin feel like he shared a secret with his Master, something only for them.

In Sacrifice, Peace by @ilonga

Summary: “Shh. . .” Anakin says, gathering the younglings around him, reminding Obi-wan of all those whispered arguments where he had insisted to Anakin that yes, he was good with children, he’d be just fine teaching Ahsoka. He can almost feel the terror rising off Anakin from the hologram; Anakin doesn’t know what’s happening either. But he isn’t letting the younglings feel it. “You need to listen to me very carefully, okay? This--” his voice breaks, “--this is going to be scary. But you have to be calm, and strong. Just like Master Yoda taught you.” [Or, the ROTS au where Obi-wan finds a very different type of pain while looking through the Temple's recordings of Order 66.]

PAIN AWAITS YOU HERE! But that is exactly why you should click, kudos, comment, bookmark, and let this fic live in your head rent free like it’s living in mine. Truly couldn’t get it out of there if I wanted to! AND I DO NOT! Yet another deathfic and angst with The Team (TM). Read it, peeps.

A moment I loved:

“And then?”Obi-wan closes his eyes, pretends he can’t feel the weight of the body in his arms, pretends it’s really Anakin he’s talking to and not some worrying coping mechanism. “And then we fight.” he says.

to hold by @katierosefun

Summary: “What—” Ahsoka looked up and, where she had expected to find a mumbling drunk, she found instead—

“Master Kenobi?” Ahsoka asked, stunned. She straightened, already swinging her backpack around herself again.

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan managed. He was breathing hard, just barely bent over because he was supporting, Ahsoka realized dumbly, Anakin.

Anakin, whose head was lolling against Obi-Wan’s shoulder. Whose face was two shades too pale and eyes fluttering and lips parted in a soundless groan that brought Ahsoka right back to battlefields and med bays and other places that she hadn’t been in a long, long while. [or: after leaving the Order, Ahsoka runs into some familiar faces.]

Caroline at it again with the post-wrong-jedi disaster trio angst comin’ in hot! Some platonic bed-sharing, some confused Anakin, some conflicted Ahsoka, some pained Obi-Wan. Well–strike that. They’re all in pain. But what do we expect, honestly? What do we want, honestly? Pain. We want pain.

A moment I loved:

“Only another dream,” Obi-Wan said. He looked at Ahsoka, his face just barely shadowed. “Seems that it’s passed.”

Another.

Ahsoka’s stomach twisted. She looked at the hand she was holding. It was strange—she couldn’t remember if she had ever actually held onto Anakin’s hand this tightly before, but now she could feel the familiar callouses, make out just the faintest of old scars. Ahsoka squeezed it once.

Not near as many as I planned to do or have saved and ready to rec, but...this already got, er...quite lengthy. So! Same time, next week! I’ll have some more! (Well, probably not same time and maybe not even next week...but soon.)

#fic rec #how is this only thirteen fics hahahahahaha #I literally just cannot shut up #go kudos and comment and reblog their stuff PLS I beg you!

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themanip · 4 years

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alternate routes

SYNOPSIS — how do you go throughout life? well, you find someone you like. get to know them. start dating. break up a few times, get back together. get married. have some kids. die old. typical. fucking in a back room of an awards show, not once, but twice as complete strangers, was definitely not how most relationships start out.

PAIRING — taehyung x metzi (oc) WARNINGS — descriptions of cheating, fliphones, mentions of getting laid, really bad intros tbh, the introvert line being introverts, and girls who are rlly bad at timing, an asshole named ryan, cursing WORD COUNT — just over 3.1k AUTHOR’S NOTE — hi! i am so fucking bad at writing the first chapter or two, i promise if you can bear the beginning of this story, it gets better. i have two and a half chapters written so far but i am writing super often! once a few more chapters get published i will create a masterlist. please enjoy and if you have any comments or recs don’t hesitate to let me know!! :)))

𝟏: 𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐄

𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟖 ⇥ The universe known to man is a labyrinth—an irregular maze, a passage that cannot be routed—and to understand that took more than an average mind. The matter was far too complicated than any obsolete man to comprehend on a whim. Millenia passed before galaxies were formed, planets were created, all unbeknownst to the stars bursting just miles apart.

From early amphibians, to the ice age, to cavemen, evolution has made great strides in every species. Humans in the past were variants called homosapiens, and most likely came from chimpanzees. Great strides like this were something to be proud of, you'd think.

When Metzi Ludovic realized that birds can fly with natural evolution, while humans had to industrialize it (thanks to the Wright brothers) she was pretty distraught. As an imaginative and critical eight-year old, fifteen years later, not much had changed. Currently, she was pondering over the fact that humans are one of the few species with opposable thumbs.

Majority of animals had not yet evolutionized to create opposable thumbs. While frantic over this, she also imagined her beautiful Pomeranian, with thumbs popping out of his paws. Her thoughts were quickly subdued, thanks to her coherent thoughts making an appearance. As cool as it would be, all other animals would devour humans if they gained that ability.

Is that the only reason humans are all mighty? They can industrialize and aim properly due to their adaptations, so that they somehow became top of the food chain?

Thankfully, she was redacted from her thoughts as her manager, Emmy, let out a distressed sigh. "Wren, we cannot change your outfit again. You look beautiful," At this point, looking at Wren, she knew that she would look good. Somehow, she couldn't convince herself.

"Wren, we can switch. I don't hate green, so you can take blue if you want it. I really don't mind," Metzi smiled softly, and she knew it was the right thing to offer as Wren's face lit up, a few tears being wiped away. "Really? Are you sure?"

"Yeah, just do me a favor and loosen the ties on that, please. I have had way too many tacos yesterday to fit into it with the strings that tight," a small laugh left her mouth, and as she laid on the comfortable sofa. It was plush, but somehow offered no lumbar support. Who the hell makes a couch so soft, yet so unbearable for convenience of naps?

Selfish, she thought.

This dressing room was beautiful, so you'd think they'd have enough funds to make a decent couch. She could enjoy the aesthetics of the room, anyways. A luxurious baby pink covered the walls, and was bordered by pristine white. Plush gray carpet was under her feet, and was stain free. With Malorie in here, that probably wouldn't last long.

She was over by the double mirrors, applying powder over her face. She was so beautiful, Metzi couldn't fathom why she insisted on so much makeup. The same could be said about herself, so she kept her somewhat inner misogynistic comments at bay. She was pretty quiet, but something was off. She wasn't usually this quiet, so Metzi shot her a text.

She was very personal, and barely talked about what bothered her. Occasionally, Metzi would get her to open up, which she could physically see the relief on her face as she broke down. A brief, but to the point was written out on Metzi's phone.

you don't seem okay. wanna talk about it? Read 2:33 PM

The three dots popped up, and Metzi's attention was quickly brought to Vida, who sat down next to her, letting out a sigh. "How much longer until Olive gets here? I'm so close to taking a nap," Vida quickly put her hair into a makeshift ponytail, and leaned back, closing her eyes.

"It's only two, so I imagine not for a good hour or so, a nap sounds kind of nice," Wren commented, stood in the other corner of the room, with Emmy helped her undo the straps of her outfit. Her green silk top complimented her skin perfectly, but Metzi knew it was too late to convince her.

"Well, I'm out, wake me up when she gets here," Vida quickly blurts, and her head is now comfortably laying on the arm of the sofa. "I'll get up, I have to go to the bathroom anyways," Metzi commented, sighing before getting up.

Silence followed, and the blonde decided to take a look at her phone. A text was sent back on Malorie's behalf, and she widened her eyes momentarily. Standing still, she turned back to look at her. A face of guilt was evident, and she tried her best to hold her breath.

i have something to tell you, i'm not supposed to. i just feel so bad knowing while you don't i really shouldn't have said anything forget it

meet me in the bathroom

Read 2:37PM

Metzi's mind was in a whirlwind, and she couldn't think of anything she'd be referring to. Of course, it was useless, because clearly she wasn't meant to know about it. She hurried out of the room, the last thing she heard was Wren complaining once more about her outfit.

The hallways were empty, mostly because they'd came so early, and Metzi took her time reaching the bathroom. It was communal, so she really hoped that nobody else was here yet. The awards were meant to start in a few hours, and considering they had three faces to paint with makeup, early was a necessity.

"I hope you won't be mad at me," A small, timid voice aired behind her. The blonde turned around, and clutched her phone in fear. "I'm not, please tell me what's going on,"

As Malorie opened her phone, Metzi tapped her foot anxiously.

God, she really had to piss.

The brunette looked up at her, and showed her a photo.

"What is that?"

"That, was Ryan. On Saturday."

Ryan was her boyfriend of six years. An anxious cramping formed in her stomach at the mixture of his name and the tone of Malorie's voice. The photo she was now staring at made her want to vomit. Her stomach was now doing somersaults.

In the photo, it was indeed Ryan, in Metzi's own bed, with a mop of curly red hair under him. Most was covered by the sheets, but it was enough to come to the correct conclusion. He was clearly enjoying it too, judging by his face. Upon further inspection, she noticed something odd.

Grabbing the phone out of Malorie's hand, she zoomed in. On her nightstand, where a picture of the two usually sat, was now face down. While he fucked another woman in her bed, he turned her face down.

Tears pricked at her eyes, and she took a deep breath in.

What happened Saturday? She was home mostly all day, so when did he have time to do this?

"What—how did you get this?"

"I came to give you your present, and I heard something. Y'know since you gave me keys? I figured it was okay to come in, and your bedroom door was open. I knew Ryan would try to make me the liar, so I took a picture. He told me that if I told you," Malorie pursed her lips, "well he threatened to do something pretty fucked up."

"Holy fuck," Metzi whispered, "I just—I had no fucking clue. This entire time, and who knows how long he's been fucking her?"

One lonesome tear fell down her cheek. In anger or sadness, Malorie didn't know.

Opening her phone, she opened Ryan's contact. "Hey," Malorie whispered, her voice now soft. "If he tells you anything about me, promise you won't believe him?"

"Of course, you come first. Always."

She debated on whether or not to call him, but instead opted on a text.

I hope you enjoyed fucking merida, we're done. get your things out of my house by tomorrow. delete my number.

She wiped the tears from her eyes, and a smile adorned her face. Her bladder problems now the least of her concerns, she started back for the dressing room. Emmy now sat at the vanity, on her phone, and Vida and Wren were basically cuddling.

Surprised at the sudden intrustion, all eyes landed on the pair standing in the doorway.

"Ryan cheated on me, so now we're all single." Metzi gave nobody the chance to respond, as if anyone could think of what to say, and took a deep breath in.

"I haven't been fucked in months, and now I know why. So, I'm gonna get laid tonight, feel free to join me."

All seven of them had their faces beat to perfection, their outfits tailored and steamed of any wrinkles. They looked absolutely impeccable, as if the world around them kissed their feet. Hell, some reporters actually acted like that.

The members of BTS were now known worldwide, and it seemed that they were sought after by nearly everyone. Each member was so unique—so captivating in every aspect. Personalities somehow intertwine perfectly, yet polar opposites sometimes.

Proud but humble men, they basked in the warmth of positive attention. All eyes were on them for now, and they proudly understood it. As they walked on the red carpet of the music event, Yoongi and Jungkook both hated what they would be forced to do in mere minutes. As self-declared introverts, social interactions were about to start, and they honestly would rather sit in the corner and get this over with.

They would meet a few smaller artists, an occasional household name, (which they would fawn over for the rest of the night) and then be on their way. It would probably be in a few news articles, and some artists would insist on pictures, and they would be spread around within minutes. It was the same routine, and almost every time they would speak as little as possible, save for Namjoon, and would discuss it later. Hollywood was English dominated, and they despised it.

"Right now we only have to meet one group, and then we're okay for a few hours," Namjoon spoke quietly and quickly, and they piled off of the red carpet into a building. The hallways were scary, dark and empty, but a light above them quickly lit up.

To their surprise, the hallway was beautiful. The walls were an navy blue, white accents on top and bottom. Numerous gold paintings and records lined the walls, and it seemed to go on forever.

"Who is it we're supposed to be meeting? This hallway is a bit sketchy," Jimin perked up, and Namjoon chuckled. "WB,"

"Who is that?"

"I can't remember what their name stands for, but they sing that one song," Namjoon goes on to hum the tune to a familiar song that got pretty big, and all of the members start singing along. Of course, the lyrics are completely off and the tune is absolutely horrid, but they all recognize it vaguely.

All numbly following Namjoon, he was taking rough instructions from their manager to get there. This was not how it usually happened, but he had said something urgent came up. He had told Namjoon how to get there, and he knew that they were smart enough to make it without breaking a couple ligaments.

"Group? I thought it was one singer," Jin commented, and Taehyung nodded in agreement. "I would have never thought it was more than one. Are they American?"

"I guess we're going to find out," he snickered, and they all stopped at the corner. The door was slightly creaked open, and soft laughter could be heard. It was feminine, soft. It sounded like pure happiness was inside that door.

To double check, Namjoon eyed the sign on the door.

A large, black WB was written so even the partially blind could read. It was odd, the only dressing room out of probably at least a hundred, was all the way back, alone. They had no time to question it before Jin took a few strides forward, and boasted his English abilites.

"Come on-uh, guys."

The rest of them burst into laughter, and Namjoon quickly followed suit, knowing Jin would not be the prime candidate for introductions. He would simply utter a few English words, turn to Namjoon for help, and in panic, make a really bad play on words in Korean.

Timidly, Namjoon's knuckles rapped on the already-open door, accidentally pushing it further open a bit. "Come in!"

They were met with three girls stuffing their faces with chocolate cake, and another laying on the floor, fiddling with a.. flip-phone?

Jin grimaced at the reminder, glad it wasn't pink.

All eyes awkwardly met at the realization, and two of the three muffling down cake choked a bit. "Emmy, I thought you said 5:30?" Malorie was the one to ask, but none of the boys knew that.

"It is 5:30,"

The cake was swallowed within seconds, the flip-phone was now laying on the table, untouched. Four girls scrambled up simultaneously, and watched as the rest of the men piled in. An awkward stout of silence followed, and this so called Emmy, rose and met the boys first.

She had a firm grip, and introduced herself as their manager. The situation was humorous to say the least, these girls who could pass off as teenagers, were standing in single file in shame. The first was a beautiful girl with a large afro, and she kept a tight smile. She did not know who they were, nor did she really care. She introduced herself as Wren.

Next, was a taller woman, who seemed a hint older, with large winged eyeliner. She was Vida. Jin's first instinct was that she reminded him of him, she was definitely the oldest. Then, a smaller girl with a thick smile and soft curls was next. Soft hands, gentle grip. Her name was Malorie.

The last, was a young woman with blonde hair. Realistically, she didn't have any defining features besides her hair, she was the average American-looking girl. She introduced herself as Metzi, and to their surprise, bowed.

"It's really nice to meet you guys," Emmy let out a soft chuckle, and Namjoon nodded tightly. "Are you performing tonight?" It was Malorie who had asked, a soft question. "Yes, actually,"

"I heard you are as well," Namjoon replied, hoping to end the small talk quickly. "Yes we are! I'm surprised you've heard of us, I mean we're not huge."

She wasn't lying, but they definitely weren't small, either. Sixth biggest girlgroup of all time by album sales just behind TLC. Thirtieth on the most followed Spotify artist. Their debut album was certified Gold in six countries. Humble was the key to success, though.

"I'm not sure how big they are in the States, but aren't they pretty well known in Korea?" Yoongi spoke, but of course he wasn't talking to the girls, he was talking to his bandmates. He also spoke in Korean, which is why he nearly had a heart attack when a very feminine voice responded in Korean as well.

"We're big in Korea? I knew we were pretty well known in Japan, but I never really knew about that," It was the blonde one, Metzi. All seven members were in shock, the way she spoke it so effortlessly. If she didn't look the way she did, she could pass off as Native Korean by language alone.

"I know South Korea is very conservative and insistent upon how they operate things, and we're probably the farthest thing from it. I just was under the impression that we didn't fit the mold to do well there," Metzi continued talking, and Wren, Vida and Malorie had absolutely no clue what was going on or being discussed.

Had this been in Spanish, all the girls could have participated. Metzi just insisted on learning Korean, though.

They didn't seem too bothered, though, instead more humored.

"She's been waiting to use that one, huh?" Vida whispered, laughing lightly. "You're not wrong, Korea is known to be very conservative, however, that doesn't mean you have to fit stereotypes to break Korea or any other Asian country for that matter," Namjoon spoke in English this time, and finally the other three girls got a whiff of the conversation.

"We are the farthest thing from ideal boy-groups in America, and we broke it for the most part. Obviously a lot of it is due to our fan base, but point still stands." Seokjin broke in, the conversation now half Korean, half English.

"Good to know," Metzi said softly, a grin on her face.

"How did you learn Korean?" Taehyung spoke up in curiousity, and crinkled his eyes. "I started learning a few years ago before we kind of blew up, and when we visited Korea a few times, I just picked it up a bit. Still a lot I don't know, but I can speak pretty fluently now."

Taehyung nodded in understanding, silently applauding her ability to simply pick up on a language. He doesn't think he will ever gain fluency in English, no matter how hard he'd try. It was a lot harder than he imagined it to be.

"I'm gonna be honest, from media portrayals you guys are made out to be asshats, but you seem pretty down to Earth. Nice to know the fame doesn't get to your head, you know?"

Now it was Wren speaking, and a few snickers sounded from Jungkook and Jimin's mouth. "Asshat," Jimin repeated softly, and they broke into more laughter.

"We appreciate that, thank you. Ignore them," Hoseok spoke this time, a large smile adorning his face. "We will watch your performance tonight, and cheer you on."

"Ditto," Metzi responded in English this time, and Hobi's eyes crinkled in confusion. "Same to you," she clarified in Korean, and he nodded.

They said their goodbyes, and Metzi told all the girls to bow. Namjoon and Vida had a brief talk, and it was no time before BTS and WB were now separate, discussing the events that had just taken place.

The talk of the night was the mysterious blonde girl who spoke fluent Korean.

taglist: @princessoftheroad <3

#kth #kim taehyung #taehyung fic #taehyung fluff #taehyung smut #taehyung x oc #bts smut #bts fluff #bts fic #bts x oc #perrie edwards #little mix #min yoongi #jung hoseok #jeon jungkook #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #park jimin

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quinintheclouds · 4 years

Note

Hey, I just read your post on ADHD/EFDD and was just wondering if you have read any research articles on this and if you have, could you tell me which ones because it all sounds super interesting and I need to choose a topic for my psych lit review and I’m thinking about doing something to do with all the stigma around and misconceptions about different mental health disorders.. it’s totally okay if not tho, I know it’s a big ask, but thanks anyway

That sounds like such a great topic!!! I would be HONORED to help :D

The first person I think of when discussing the term EFDD is Dr. Russell Barkley. He’s one of the leading ADHD experts, and has been a spearhead for studying executive dysfunction in people with ADHD for decades. Very much ahead of his time compared to the DSM. I’ve had his book “Taking Charge of Adult ADHD” recommended to me so many times, but have yet to read it.

Here’s some free stuff, though!

[reblogs appreciated because Tumblr hates posts with links and I wanna make sure this anon sees it!]

I tried to include some short stuff and longer stuff, some articles, images, videos, and comic recs, so you can choose based on your current energy and focus level :) I’ve also bolded links and key points of each source if you like skimming. Let’s go!

...................................

Here’s an interesting article/study on EFDD! They found that “ADHD [is] associated with deficits in inhibition, managing one’s attention, self-directed speech and rule-following, self-motivation, and even self-awareness [...] ADHD therefore involves deficits in self-restraint, [...] selfsensing and imagery, self-control of emotion, and self-directed play for problem-solving.”

Thank you for motivating me to look up some articles, because I learned some new things, too! For instance, they assert that ADHD could also be called SRDD (Self-Regulation Deficit Disorder), but conclude the article by saying either SRDD or EFDD fits better than ADHD, and that the terms could be used interchangeably, because SR (self-regulation) and EF (executive function) are effectively talking about the same things. So his assertion is that even if the name ADHD never changes, it can still be scientifically classified as either of the other terms. I believe in recent years he’s preferred EFDD more and more.

[note that the above article/study is from 2011, back when we were on the DSM-IV, so a lot of research has been done since then]

...................................

If that article’s a bit wordy or you want something more visual and up-to-date, here’s a really detailed PowerPoint presentation used during the 2018 ADHD Symposium! It’s long but well-organized so you can just read the big headers or you can read all the bullet points explaining it. Keep in mind this was a lecture, so some of it probably made more sense in person. I’m glad I read this, because I realize the terminology I’ve used is slightly off: according to the Symposium, there aren’t “subtypes” of ADHD, but the different names (ADHD-PI, ADHD-PH, and ADHD-C) are really just used to show the prevalence of certain symptoms in that individual. So they’re all terms for ADHD, but “subtype” was poor word choice on my part.

Oh! I just found a video of him giving a lecture in 2012 using many of the same PowerPoint slides! Here ya go! It’s a bit longer than the other videos I’ve linked below (13min), but it might make the slides easier to interpret :)

...................................

If you want a really short and basic overview, here’s a video explaining 5 main ways executive functions affect the brain and how they work differently in people with ADHD. [I put the video below as well if you wanna stay on tumblr] It’s from 2010, but it holds up. It only covers 5 big ones, so remember (if you can) that executive function affects EVERYTHING and the symptoms will affect everyone differently and at different levels.

This is just the most basic overview and a good place to start:

youtube

...................................

Here’s one where he talks about our Time-Blindness! (below) I was going to pick a couple favorite quotes to give you an idea, but that’d wind up being a transcript of the whole video because HE GETS IT. This is from 2014, but I CANNOT recommend it enough!!! He mentions that ADHD doesn’t have a deficit of attention, but rather a deficit of intention. He describes us as having a near-sighted sense of time, and talks about deadlines, “laziness,” etc.

ALSO he talks about how our brains DON’T CONNECT our knowledge to our performance (back of brain to front) like everyone else’s, so we have the same level of knowledge and intelligence, but can’t access and use it the way others can. This is why teaching skills and organization/memory/time-management tips isn’t helpful -- we can learn them, but our knowledge and action centers are separated, so actually doing them/sticking with them is just as hard as before.

If you don’t watch the whole thing, at least skip to 3:29 cause that part’s really funny and relatable (ok the whole thing is relatable):

youtube

...................................

And of course, I highly recommend the YouTube channel How to ADHD! I have a couple friends who work on it, and they REALLY know their stuff! (They’re the ones who taught me during a game night that RSD isn’t a real term and it should be called “rejection-sensitivity” as part of the emotional dysregulation umbrella)

I went looking and found this video (below) has the BEST explanation of it that I’ve seen in such a concise, entertaining way. I hadn’t seen this one before, but it even covers some of the things I mentioned in that post your ask is about! Especially the Internal Restlessness that I mentioned as the true “hyperactivity” we all share; even though some of us also express outward hyperactivity, both presentations come from the same restlessness in our brains.

youtube

^^^This has some great examples, visuals, animations, and different ways of explaining and thinking about our symptoms! If you want more about this, the description has a bunch of links to their sources! Jessica and everyone else who works on this channel is great at making the videos watchable for people with ADHD (even if we have to rewind sometimes)

Here's Jessica's official Twitter @HowtoADHD! (I was today years old when I found out that she follows me)

...................................

And if you want something REALLY short and simple, here’s a 2 minute animation comparing living with ADHD to trying to film a movie with a director who keeps falling asleep [below]

youtube

....................................

If you like comics:

My favorite ADHD comic artists are: ADHD Alien [@ADHD_Alien on Twitter and @adhd-alien on Tumblr]; Dani Donovan [@danidonovan on Twitter and @danidonovan on Tumblr -- we’re somehow twitter mutuals and she is such a sweetheart. She has some really good infographics, too!!]; ADHD Bri [@AdhdBri on Twitter and @adhdbri on Tumblr]; and dreamadept [@yume_dango on Twitter and @yume-dango on Tumblr]

They’re all well-researched, funny, genuine, intelligent, insightful, talented artists who depict ADHD in a very accurate and relatable way. Go check ‘em out and support them! :D

....................................

I’m gonna stop there for now, but PLEASE feel free to add on to this with other sources, questions, videos, thoughts, comic artists, etc.!!! Hope this helps someone out there!

#adhd #actuallyadhd #efdd #executive function deficit disorder #how to adhd #dr. russell barkley #I hope you see this in time for your essay!!!#tried to give you a variety of sources and places to start #quinpost #quinanswer #oof I'm sure I forgot some adhd comic artists I love but maybe I'll remember later lol #Anonymous

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drawlfoy · 4 years

Text

The Wonders of Ohio P.5

masterlist (check here for parts 1-4!) request guidelines

pairing: draco x reader

request: from 14 year old me babey

warnings: cringe, mentions of drug use, mentions of sex, language, and just bad writing

summary: y/n is in her senior year of high school when she is asked to take on an exchange student from britain that’s a little...different. this is NOT a nonmagic AU. draco is still a wizard and this will become and integral part of the story shortly.

a/n: heyyyy everyone. i graduated from high school this week and i’m posting this as my happy-one-year-to-me. as some of you may know, i posted my very first fic on this day a year ago. i’m really happy to see how i’ve grown since and i’m so lucky to have shared this with all of you. anyways, nittygritty--

this part is really the last slow exposition chapter. chapters 6 on will be a whole whirlwind beginning with homecoming and i hope that you guys are willing to stick around. i promise itll be worth the wait. y/n is going to get the story arc of a lifetime and also please do not hate heather she is just going through it ok

anywayssssssss

tags tags tags @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural

word count: 4.6k (;))

song recs:

strawberry blonde -- mitski

in your neighbors garden -- mimi bay

wishes -- beach house

ode to artifice -- samia

pink in the night -- mitski

enjoy <3

The seatbelt buckle scorched the side of Y/N’s exposed neck as she turned to face the disheveled blonde in the passenger seat.

“Do I need to teach you to set an alarm?”

Draco let out a huff. “Stop. Do you have a��.a comb, or a brush, or something here?” His hands looked abnormally fidgety. Their actions were shaky, varying from patting his pockets to running through his hair. He seemed more and more frustrated each time his hands left his pockets empty.

How curious Y/N thought as she racked her brain for any remembrance of putting a brush in her car. It was always a mess, and she honestly couldn’t blame Draco for assuming that anything could be in there.

“I don’t think there’s one here,” said Y/N, trying to sound at least a little sympathetic despite the fact that his tardiness had them 10 minutes late. “You can look around if you want, king.”

“What’d you call me?” His voice was suddenly sharp and awake.

Y/N rolled her eyes so hard that she thought they’d get stuck in the back of her head. “You don’t--ok. It’s a joke. You can call guys here that.”

“And it means that I’m…?”

“It means I’m acknowledging that you exist, I guess. It’s not like it has a strict negative or positive connotation. Like, I can say ‘Ok king’ to any man telling me something and it can either be sarcastic, or it can be because I don’t know what else to say and just want to let him know I heard him.”

Draco’s eyes looked a tad glazed over when Y/N dared a glance in his direction.

“I know it’s confusing. I’m sorry. I’ll try and ease you into the world of American slang.”

He granted her a little “uh-huh” before opening up the glovebox with great difficulty and rummaging through the mess. Y/N would’ve felt more embarrassed about the tampon that fell on the ground in the process if he seemed like he actually knew what it was.

Her attention turned back to the road as Draco continued to sift through things. Y/N couldn’t help but wonder if there was anything embarrassing hidden away in the corners of her car--after all, it hadn’t been organized since the beginning of summer--and decided that it was better to pretend it wasn’t happening.

It wasn’t the eerie silence that eventually prompted her to turn to look his direction--no, it was the weird energy in the car, like the feeling right before a thunderstorm. All the hair raised on her arms, and she shivered...but it was stifling hot in the car.

“Oh, did you find a brush?” she asked. His hair laid as perfectly as always, but his hands were lying shaking in his lap, palms to the sky. No hairbrush was in sight.

“Er... “ He was paler than usual, which was quite the feat for someone who looked like a ream of paper. “No. Just remembered a trick my father taught me.”

She tensed at the mention of his father--the very first time Draco had done so. “Oh. Okay. Glad you got it figured out, king.”

Her voice lightened on the last word, hoping she could coax a little smile out of him.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Ok.”

oOo

There were many things Y/N thought she understood, but Draco Malfoy being in her Physics C class was not one of them. She took pity and sat next to him as he fumbled his way through the first lecture. His notes, while neat, were littered with crossed out portions and question marks.

You do know there’s an eraser on your pencil, right? she jotted on a note that she sent his way. His brow furrowed and he seemed to tap at the end of the eraser for just a few moments before deciding otherwise and xing out another practice problem he’d done incorrectly. Symbols that she’d never seen before were scattered all throughout his notes.

Maybe the UK kids just learn stuff differently.

By the time that Physics came to an end, Y/N was eager to get away from the storm cloud that was brewing over Draco’s perfectly smoothed and infuriatingly pretty moonbeam colored hair. The amount of attention he was getting from all the other girls made Y/N want to jump off a cliff--suddenly everyone was her “best friend” “just wanting to check up on what happened over summer”. She was grateful to see the face of Lizzy, grinning and looking mischievous during their break period.

“You must be Draco,” said the redhead, a glint in her eyes. He looked a little scared.

“Er...yeah.”

“Mind giving us some privacy? Y/N and I have some urgent matters to discuss,” she continued, looking him up and down. Y/N attempted to ignore the twist in her gut as she watched him swallow and nod, turning away to go brood elsewhere. Once he was out of sight, Lizzy grabbed her arm and yanked her into the girl’s bathroom.

“It’s so funny how he’s following you around like a lost puppy,” Lizzy said. “Also, he’s gorgeous. If you don’t at least try to get some of that, then I’m never trusting your judgement again.”

“But, Li-”

“The boy’s a fucking walking Wattpad story cover. Dark, tragic past, unbelievably sharp jawline, rich parents, exotic accent....honestly, Y/N, I don’t know what else you could want.”

“Mom literally called him my host brother,” said Y/N. The bathroom was starting to smell suspiciously like cotton candy. “That’s wrong. On so many levels.”

“But you’re not related!”

“But it’s gross! And predatory! The kid doesn’t even know how to do basic algebra! I’m all he has!”

Lizzy’s eyebrow found its new home in the middle of her forehead. “You’ve gone absolutely batty if you think that every girl cursed with attraction to men in Cincinnati wouldn’t jump his skin at the chance. Use your head, queenie. He’s not alone. Shoot your shot.”

Y/N opened her mouth to serve back a retort--that was definitely there, thank you very much--but decided against it once she realized that the bathroom had become dead silent. “Um...maybe we can go over this later.” She flickered her eyes over to the line behind them that was now intently hanging on their every word. “I forgot I had to talk to the counselor.”

Lizzy was smirking as they exited the bathroom and began the search for Draco. It didn’t take long--the circle comprised of Heather and her friends was more than enough of a giveaway that he was about.

“Draco, sorry to make you wait,” Y/N called out. It took all her effort to abstain from cringing as her voice rang out across the group. Heather turned to send her a big smile.

“Hey Y/N! You didn’t tell me that Draco was from London!”

“He’s not,” she responded. “He’s from Wiltshire.”

“Wiltshire. Of course. That’s what I meant.”

Draco’s smile was tense as he looked down at Heather--who stood roughly 4 inches below him--but he was smiling, and that wasn’t something that Y/N was on the receiving end of frequently. She didn’t know whether to be offended or relieved.

“I’m sure. Break’s almost over, Draco. I can show you where the English department is before the time is up.”

He paused, looking down at the blonde grinning up at him. “Er, actually, Heather already offered to show me around for the rest of the day.”

“Yeah, for sure. I’ll see you in French.”

Y/N was shocked at the sheer amount of jealousy that rose up in her throat as she turned away and made her way to Art History---the only class Y/N and Draco didn’t share. The walk was strange. Being in solitude after having a gloomy British boy attached to her hip was understandably eerie. Because that’s all it was. Adjustment. Nothing else.

She settled in at a table full of her friends, namely Sylvia. The tall girl was always a bit whimsical, but Y/N found that she was a breath of fresh air compared to everyone else. It made sense that Sylvia would take Art History--her dark academic inspired aura and the perpetually hot mug of black coffee just screamed history nut.

“How’s your new brother?” she asked after the teacher had taken attendance. “I say that because I haven’t heard his name yet.”

“Ick, it’s gross to think of him as my brother,” Y/N responded. “And I know! We need to catch up. I’m sorry about not talking to you for a bit. The time difference was a bit weird during your trip.”

“It’s ok, I get it. I was away on family business, anyways. I didn’t expect you to spend your days staying up until the wee hours of the night to tell me all about your exchange student. Anyways. His name?”

“You’re gonna scream when you hear it, Vie,” she said. “Draco Malfoy. It’s so posh. You have no idea. It definitely suits him, though. He’s very...You good?”

Sylvia’s olive toned face looked a bit paler than usual. “Yeah. Yeah, I just remembered that I forgot to take the trash out this morning. I’ll have to text my mom about it.” She adjusted the wool cardigan that hung around her shoulders and came up looking composed. “Draco, huh? His parents must hate him.”

“At the very least! He’s so rude. And uptight. I can’t tell if it’s just a Brit thing or if it’s because he’s an asshole.”

Sylvia laughed. “I mean, when I was there over the summer, it was a different culture for sure. We’re by far louder. But I didn’t meet many mean ones. You must’ve just got a bad apple, then.”

“I guess so. He is pret--”

“Ladies, is there something you’d like to share with the rest of the class?”

“No, Mrs. Jensen,” Sylvia and Y/N said in unison.

oOo

“Thoughts, king?”

“I told you not to call me that.” Draco glared at her as he tried to open the passenger side door to find that it was locked tight. “Unlock? Please?”

“And I told you not to get cozy with ASB kids, yet here we are,” said Y/N as she slotted the key into the lock and turned.

“What’s it to you?”

“Nothing. I’m just looking out for you.” She slammed the door shut and threw her bag in the bag. The line of traffic to get out of the school was long and stuffy, and she was eager to just get it over with.

The wait was so hot that Draco peeled off his stupid formalish jacket that was on thin ice of being called a blazer and probably worth more than her car. Y/N tried to look away as his hair became slightly ruffled, but she couldn’t pry her eyes away. It was endearing, almost, how someone who could look so posh and serious could have ruffly hair--and hair that naturally light, too. She had asked him one night if it was dyed, and he scowled at her and told her the grammatically correct term was dead, and that his hair was alive, just like the rest of him, thank you very much. She dropped it.

Y/N finally rolled down her window after the AC simply refused to satisfy her, and the wind was a nice reminder to keep in her own lane. Draco was beautiful. There was no other way to put it. He had a feel of power to him, like he was capable of anything but just held it back. But he was just as inaccessible as he was pretty, and there was nothing she could do about that.

“Y/N?” He asked after a few moments of sitting in silence. “What’s Homecoming?”

“Who told you about that?”

“Heather. She asked if I had a date. Is that like a ball here?”

“She asked you if you had a date on the first day?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck. ASB kids never do sleep, huh.”

“What?”

“Homecoming isn’t a ball. It’s like a...an…” Y/N paused as she saw Draco raise his eyebrows. “It’s, like, uh….Well I guess it is like a ball. An American one, though. Way less extravagant. It’s an excuse to get dressed up and run around the city. There technically is a dance, and all the ASB kids have to go, but literally no one else does but the underclassmen. Normally I go out with my friends and a date to somewhere fun and take pictures. And then get trashed afterwards.”

“Classy,” said Draco. “I think you can go now.”

A honk behind her emphasized his point as the space in between her and the car in front widened substantially.

“Thanks. Anyways, it’s not really a big deal. I’d suggest not going with Heather so you can skip out on the dance portion. Or if you want to go with her, get her to come with us into Cincinnati because I am not going to spend my last homecoming watching a grind circle.”

“A...what circle? And I don’t want to go with her.”

The relief Y/N felt was embarrassing. “Um...better if you don’t worry about it. You have a long time to figure it out anyways.”

He seemed satisfied with that answer, propping his elbow up on the center console. The pristine button up he was wearing had ridden up, exposing the pale skin and the bottom of the tattoo she had seen a hint of earlier. “Do you have a date?”

“Um. No, not yet. I don’t think anyone except for couples do yet. We have until the end of this month to figure it out, so I’m not too worried about it.”

He nodded as Y/N’s car finally left the school parking lot and began picking up speed.

“I’m assuming you had balls? At your posh boarding school?”

“Er…” Draco ran his hand through his hair, ruffling it further. “We only had one. It was when I was 14. We called it the Yule Ball.”

“Why only one?”

“It was for a special occasion. We had two other schools join us as well. It was quite a good time.”

“So every student only has one ball in their lifetime?”

“Of course not. Some of us--the ones from old families--have events like that regularly.”

“I’m sorry if this is overstepping my bounds,” began Y/N, noticing how he tensed up, “So you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But, I’m just wondering, what is your family like?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like are they nice?”

“Oh.” The line in his forehead relaxed. “No. They wouldn’t like you.”

“Glad to hear it,” she said. “Do you like them?”

She heard the breath hitch in his throat. “I don’t know anymore.”

“I’m sure it’s hard to think about it when you feel like they’ve just shipped you off without anyone,” she added. “I’m really sorry, Draco. I know I’ve been a bit mean to you. I know that I’ll never be able to understand what you’re going through right now.”

The slight smile that spread across his face would’ve knocked her to her knees if she wasn’t already sitting down. “It’s okay. I wouldn’t expect you to understand.”

The silence that awaited them for the rest of the journey was comfortable.

oOo

School began to pick up the pace after the first few days. Y/N got into the swing of homework and her extracurricular workload. Draco was having a bit more difficulty, she presumed, but he’d never admit to it. She took pity one evening and gave him her laptop opened to a Khan Academy tab for Physics and was pleased to see that he showed up to class the next day with completed homework. He asked to borrow her laptop on a much more frequent basis after that.

The routine they settled into had her heart leaping into her chest almost constantly--they’d eat breakfast together at the table, Y/N would try to ignore how pretty he looked across the table as they shared a pot of black tea (earl grey, which Y/N was thrilled to learn was his favorite as well), they’d get in the car, she’d write him notes in physics to help him (even though he never asked, he always smile and give a little shake of his head before unfolding them and intently staring at her writing), they’d drive home together and bitch about their French teacher, he’d retire to his room and do whatever pretty blonde Brits do in the afternoon, they’d meet unexpectedly at the same time in the late evening to have a final cup of tea, and then they’d go to bed and do it all over again.

It was difficult for her to admit, but Y/N was falling very quickly for Draco. It was gross, and wrong, and manipulative, and completely against the code of conduct for exchange families, but she couldn’t help but spend her days fantasizing about how his gold-spun hair would feel as she ran her fingers through it or how gently she’d trace her fingers around the tattoo on the soft flesh of his forearm…

But Y/N knew those thoughts weren’t right. And they would go away. Eventually.

“How’s it going?” Sylvia asked, effectively snapping her out of her thoughts. The Art History sub told them to go into independent study, whatever that meant. Y/N was not very good at either of those words.

“Pretty good. I can’t believe it’s been 3 weeks already,” she said. “It’s gonna be Halloween before we know it.”

“I can’t fucking waitttt,” said Sylvia. “I’m gonna be Wednesday Addams.”

“Again?”

“What else would I be? I get a new high collared black dress every year. It’d be a shame if it were going to go to waste. What are you gonna be?”

“One of the thousands of students finishing their UChicago ED app hours before the deadline.”

“You’re kidding. Can’t you just finish it the day before?”

“Where’s the fun in that? And, plus, I don’t have an idea as cool as Wednesday.”

Sylvia smirked as she opened up her planner and began to jot down something. “How’s Draco doing? I haven’t seen much of him lately. It seems like he never hangs out with us at break anymore.”

“Yeah, I ended up getting him connected with the Physics teacher. He’s getting tutored now. He thinks it’s all bullshit, but I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t get into a good school.”

“Is that all you care about?” She smiled at Y/N. “Lizzy was telling me that you’re interested in him.”

“First of all, keep your voice down. Second of all, I’m not supposed to be, so I’m not.” Y/N hoped that the edge in her voice was convincing enough.

Her friend raised her eyebrows so dramatically that her glasses nearly slipped off her nose. “Y/N, who’s gonna hear about it. You guys are both going away at the end of the year anyways, and I’m sure he’s not going to be writing to his dear mum about his love life. If it’s consensual, there’s nothing wrong with it. I think it’d be good for both of you.”

“I see that, but let’s put me in his shoes right now.” Y/N shuffled in her seat and clasped her hands. “I’m rich. I’m British. I’m very hot. My parents throw extravagant balls for me and I kiss pretty girls that say water like ‘wota’. I’ve spent my life in silk and I only drink the finest teas. My family is so important that I had to be shipped off halfway across the world just to be safe. And now my incredibly expensive life has reached a peak because I’m sleeping with a random girl in Ohio that has run approximately 4 stop signs since I’ve met her.”

“You’re sleeping with Draco?”

Y/N turned to see Lauren, a wide-eyed, obnoxious, but well meaning girl staring at her. She heard Sylvia stifle a laugh behind her. “No. I was kidding.” The smile that she followed with was awkward and showed way too many teeth.

“Oh, okay,” said Lauren. “Do you know if he likes anyone?”

Sylvia’s smirk widened.

“No, actually, he’s a pretty private guy.” Y/N sent her another tense smile, and Lauren finally turned away.

“Jealous, huh?”

“Shut up, Vie. You know I wouldn’t go for him. Even if I had the chance.”

She just raised an eyebrow and smiled.

The afternoon brought its own set of struggles. Their French teacher had blown up at another student who had been caught cheating on their last test, and it was all Y/N could do but hold back her snickers until they were out in the parking lot.

“I can’t believe they still managed to conjugate their cheat sheet wrong.” Y/N was gasping for breath as she unlocked the car door and threw her stuff inside. Draco was watching from the passenger seat, his lips in a soft upturn. “Can you imagine? Oh my god.”

He just shook his head and turned to look out the window, but she could see the smile slowly stretching across his face. “Ridiculous. You could totally tell Monsieur enjoyed it, too. I bet he gets off on making kids like Joey cry.”

“I had a teacher like that,” he started. “He was a Poti-a chemistry teacher.”

“Oh? Did he ever attack you?”

“No. He liked me. Family friends and all.”

“Ah. I almost forgot that your family was rich and influential. Thanks for the reminder.” She reached across and lightly punched his shoulder. His smile, though still remaining, seemed to shrink. “Hey, what’s that in your bag?”

Y/N motioned to the cardstock peeking out of his nondescript black backpack that always seemed to fit more than it was meant to. She could make out a few words written in what looked like a bright red sharpie--something that did not exactly scream Draco Malfoy aesthetic.

He froze up. “Er. It’s from Heather. I think she called it a Homecoming ask?”

Y/N’s throat dried up to the point that no words would willingly make the climb from her diaphragm to her tongue; instead, she settled for giving him a little nod and what she hoped was a convincing smile.

“I told her I’d think about it,” he continued. “I remember you saying that the school dances sucked. So I let her know that I wasn’t sure yet.”

She nodded again. “Super cool. You can do whatever you want, though. You can come with my group if you’d like, but you’re welcome to go with Heather’s.”

“What? So you aren’t coming with me if I go with Heather?”

“Fuck no, dude. I don’t hate her, but I would way prefer to spend a night with my friends than some girl from my French class that only talks to me because she thinks you’re hot.”

The expression Draco made reminded Y/N that he would never get comfortable with American girls calling him hot. “Ok. Have you found a date yet?”

“Chad from Econ asked me yesterday.”

“Is that why my seat was covered in glitter?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you going with him?” Draco’s hand was clenched tight in a fist in his lap.

“I think so,” said Y/N, steeling herself and deciding to just go for it. “But, of course, if you asked me I would say no to Chad. Just out of principle. I am supposed to be your tour guide, after all.”

The only parts of him moving were the few stray wisps of his hair being pushed around by the AC going.

“But that’d be weird. I’d only expect you to take that up if you really didn’t want to go to the dance itself.” She swallowed and pulled out onto the main street, putting distance between them and the school. He was silent for a few moments. The quiet, normally comfortable between them, was stifling and strange. She pretended to ignore the way he was fiddling with his cuffs.

“Yeah, it could be,” was all he said before slumping against the window and closing his eyes.

Mrs. Y/L/N was sitting at the head of the coffee table when the two arrived home, carding between a stack of letters in front of her. The mug of something--probably that new decaf blend she hadn’t stopped raving about--was sitting lopsided on a coaster, just barely about to topple off the edge. She looked like she hadn’t moved for hours, the novel she had been previously reading sat face down to preserve the spot next to her no doubt lukewarm drink.

“Hey Mom,” Y/N said as she set her keys down. “Anything good?”

She looked up, her expression morphing from startled to happy. “Other than the college brochures? Nothing, except...hm, what’s this?”

Her well manicured hand pulled at a crimson envelope, with sloping writing that seemed to shimmer in the light.

To the Y/L/N Family, it read. The loopiness of the writing looked like it wiggled at the ends, but that had to be a trick of the light. It was dim in the kitchen during afternoons, after all.

“It looks cool, open it u--”

“No!”

Draco’s voice had never sounded so loud as it did then as he lunged across the kitchen, snatching it out of her mother’s hand and clutching it to his chest. “Er, it’s for me. I recognize the handwriting.”

“Cool, see you later,” said Y/N. She was up the stairs and slamming her door before either of her housemates could say another word. After the horrible embarrassment that was technically Draco’s rejection, she needed to be alone.

Even burying her face into her pillow and squeezing her eyes shut didn’t keep the scenes from their car ride at bay. She had been so stupid, so stupid. Why did she even think he wanted that? He was her brother, after all. Oh god, does he think we’re all from Alabama or something?

She wallowed for a few more mournful minutes before deciding that she had to pick herself up and handle it like an adult. After all, she was going to be 18 in just a few months. There was no excuse for her to act like a child anymore. And, plus, it wasn’t like she couldn’t just play this off as a pity invite. Yes,that’s what she’d frame this as if he ever asked her about it again. She felt bad for him was all it was.

Once satisfied with her internal dialogue, she rolled out of bed and made for the foyer where her bag was still on the table. She’d first walk on Legos barefoot before she had to let a stupid boy--especially one that didn’t know how to turn on their shower and had to ask for her help every time--come between her and her 4.0. Never.

Her thoughts were cut short, however, when she heard a new sound from his side of the hallway. She froze, listening closely.

Draco was crying.

#draco x reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco imagine #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy #draco #draco x you #draco x y/n #draco malfoy x you #draco malfoy fanfiction #draco lucius malfoy #draco x oc #draco malfoy x oc

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i-needa-nap-please · 4 years

Text

Friends and Food

Summary:

Usagi invites Seiya, Yaten, and Taiki over to celebrate New Year's.

Notes:

This takes place before Usagi knows the Three Lights are the Starlights.

This was written for @docholligay’s same prompt party.

The prompt was Usagi Tsukino and "New Year's Fireworks".

It’s also on ao3, if you’re interested.

“Why did you drag me here?” Yaten, who was currently wrapped under five layers of blankets, bitterly muttered under her breath. “I could be home and sleeping right now, but instead, I’m freezing my damn ass off.”

“Maybe, if you stopped being a bitch for five seconds, you could actually have a good time.” Seiya snapped back. Currently, Seiya was sitting on one of those cheap folding chairs that were usually only used by parents at rec-league sporting games. A warm, big fire smoked in front of her - which was the only thing preventing Seiya from leaping out of her chair and tackling Yaten to the ground. Taking a deep breath, Seiya tried to remember she was here to relax. Even if Yaten kept acting like a huge ass, she should just brush it off and enjoy herself. She had to. For Usagi. “Bunhead’s really excited to do this with us - so please, try to be less of a bitch. I know that’s hard for you, but try.”

“Whatever.” Yaten grumbled, curling into her own shitty canvas folding chair.

A silence overtook the two as they patiently waited for Usagi and Taiki’s return. Bits of ember crackled in front of them, illuminating the otherwise dark night. Noises drifted in from outside the Tsukino’s backyard. The Tsukino’s neighbors were also outside, eagerly awaiting the - firewalks? Firewongs? Fire-somethings. Neither Seiya or Yaten could remember what word Usagi had been bambling to them about earlier. But whatever it was, it was certainly a big event. It seemed everyone in Tokyo was outside with their families, just waiting for them to start.

“It’s snack time!” Usagi’s loud voice broke the lull between the two, making them both look over their shoulder towards the girl. Usagi, outfitted in some cozy-looking bunny pajamas, bounced over to Seiya and Yaten. In her hands was a single, already-half-eaten chocolate bar. Behind her, Taiki had her arms full of various different treats: chocolates, chips, sodas, and more goodies than four people could possibly hope to eat in one night. “Help yourself! But don’t touch the peanut butter cups! Those are mine!” Usagi plopped into her own chair before taking another bite out of her chocolate bar. “Oh!” She perked up in her chair, speaking while loudly chewing. “And don’t touch the barbeque chips either! Those are also mine!”

Taiki unburdened herself by carefully setting the large haul of junk food on the ground, out of the fire’s reach. With a sigh, she plopped into another chair, while simultaneously grabbing a bag of cookies for herself.

“Thank you again for having us over tonight, Miss Tsukino.” As always, Taiki spoke like she was giving some lecture. So methodically and evenly. Like a teacher.

Usagi hummed and nodded absentmindedly. “Yeah, sure! It’s no problem! Fireworks are better with friends! And food!”

“Ah, yes. Fireworks.” Taiki nodded while opening the bag of cookies. “I was hoping-.”

“Wait!” Usagi lunged forward, interrupting Taiki and ripping the cookies out of her hands. “Those are mine too! Sorry!” She certainly didn’t sound sorry, though. The Starlights watched as Usagi then shoveled a few cookies into her mouth - which was already full of chocolate - without a care in the world. As if she hadn’t just rudely yanked them out of Taiki’s hands.

“Jeez, can we eat anything you brought out?” Yaten spat, giving Usagi one of her more menacing glances. It was wholly ineffective on Usagi, who just continued to stuff sweets down her throat.

“Yeah,” Usagi simply responded. “You can eat the stuff that’s not mine.”

“Well it seems like everything you brought out is for you.” Yaten retorted.

“That’s not true…” Her sentence trailed off as she stared at the pile of snacks. Slowly, Usagi got off her chair and kneeled besides the pile. She stared at the pile with a level of concentration that looked downright disturbing on Usagi. Eventually, she set aside about five different bags of chips and candy - and a few sodas as well, because Usagi was a kind and generous host (according to herself, at least). “That’s all for you.” Usagi gestured to the small pile before gesturing to the big pile. “And that’s for me!”

Yaten looked ready to burst, so Seiya quickly cut in. She let out a hardy laugh as she reached out and stole a piece of candy from “Usagi’s” pile. Usagi tried to stop Seiya’s theft, but Seiya was far too quick for her. In mere moments, Seiya had half a candy bar down her throat.

“Y’know,” Seiya started conversationally between bites. “Being stingy isn’t good for you.”

“Being a thief isn’t good for you either!” Usagi retorted, but didn’t attempt to steal the candy back. Instead, she plopped back into her seat and angrily nibbled on the cookie’s she stole from Taiki. “Imagine what the headlines will say when I tell the press about this! Popular Idol Steals From A Defenseless, Pretty, Cute, Amazing, and Beautiful Girl!”

Yaten snorted. “I doubt the headlines will look like that. More like, Little Brat Gets What She Deserves.” The shade of red in Usagi’s cheeks matched the fiery red of the flames in front of them. Yaten truly did have a talent for making people angry.

“Anyways.” Taiki pointedly interrupted before things got out of hand. “As I was saying earlier, I was hoping you could tell us a bit more about these… fireworks, Miss Tsukino.”

“Wait.” Any anger from before was completely gone as Usagi looked between the Starlights with wide eyes. “You guys don’t know what fireworks are?”

“Er, no?” Seiya hesitantly replied. Nervous glances were exchanged between the Starlights, but Usagi didn’t seem to notice them. “We used to live in the....countryside, so - um, we don’t know much about...fireworks. Or New Year’s celebrations in general. So, um, yeah.” That had to be the worst lie Yaten or Taiki had ever heard, but Usagi seemed to buy it.

“I guess that makes sense.” Usagi hummed, tapping her finger against her chin. All of the Starlights let out a relieved sigh. “Fireworks are kinda hard to explain. Like, they’re really loud and can be scary - but at the same time, they’re so pretty! It’s like, like, seeing glowing flowers in the sky! They come in all different shapes and sizes! You’ll never see the same firework twice! Kinda like snowflakes.” Gesturing to the sky, Usagi finished her mini-speech. “That was a bit confusing. But trust me, once you see them, you’ll know what I mean!”

“Huh, they sound really cool.” Seiya commented, leaning back in her chair and staring out at the sky. “Can’t wait to see ‘em.” A silence - which really wasn’t a silence, because they all were eating so loudly - overtook the fire as all four of them looked towards the sky. “So where are the others, Bunhead? I’m surprised your little posse isn’t here.” “Rei’s busy at the shrine. Shrine’s get really busy on New Year’s.” Usagi licked some chocolate off of her fingers. “Ami is spending New Year’s with her mom. And Mako likes to do a deep cleaning for New Year’s - so she’s at home doing that.” Pausing for a moment to think, Usagi licked the excess chocolate off her lips. “As for Minako, I think she mentioned something about a party? I asked her about it and she told me it wasn’t a party for kids, so I couldn’t come. I bugged her about it all day at school but she still didn’t tell me. Oh! And then Haruka and Michiru are doing something special - I think.” Usagi’s brows furrowed in concentration. “They didn’t actually tell me their plans, but when I asked them about it, Haruka just got all red! And all Michiru said was ‘we have big plans’, so it must be something fun!”

Seiya almost spit out the drink she had opened while Usagi was talking. “Oh yeah, I’m sure those two have some big-” Seiya emphasized this word with an obscene gesture “-plans, alright.” She doubled over, snickering to herself, shoulders shaking with laughter. Taiki and Usagi, who had missed the gesture, stared at her in confusion; while Yaten, who had seen the gesture, dramatically rolled her eyes.

“Oh, grow up.” Yaten scoffed. “You act like a damn twelve year old.”

“Shut up! Nobody asked for your opinion, dumbass!”

“Will you two both be quiet? That’s no way to speak in front of Miss Tsukino!”

A loud noise - a bang - followed by an ear piercing whistle cut off the budding argument between the Starlights. All three of them jumped up from their chairs and quickly turned towards the noise, ready to fight. Still in her chair, Usagi let out an excited squeal and pointed to the sky, where a single, green flare soared.

“They’re starting!”

Another loud bang occured when the green flare reached its peak and then burst. It lit up the sky, like a great, huge, verdant flower. Rooftops were illuminated, people from other yards oohed and ahhed, and the bright lush light slowly faded back into the black of night. The Starlights stood, frozen to the spot. They stared with wide eyes, expressions changing from one of panic to one of wonder. Soon, more flares were shooting up to the sky. Each of them banging loudly as they exploded in brilliant, dazzling colors.

It was absolutely memorizing.

Slowly, each Starlight sat back down, eyes still glued to the display in front of them. Usagi, oblivious to the Starlight’s absolute awe-struck astonishment, continued to grin and giggle in her seat, all while shoveling in more cookies. The fireworks show began in earnest after that. Firework after firework was fired, repeatedly lighting the sky in beautiful hues. The night sky went from a warm red to a deep blue and everything in between. It wasn’t until the fireworks show finally stopped for the night, that the Starlights were able to break free from their trance.

“That was…” Taiki, who was usually so good with words, sat there speechless. She stared at the now empty sky, her brain desperately trying to find some way to describe what she felt. “...amazing.” It was a wholly inadequate description. To Taiki, that firework show was beyond amazing, it was one of the best things she had ever seen before. But it was the only word that came to mind. “They do this every year?”

“Yep! Every year!” Usagi cheerfully replied. “And they do a bunch throughout the year too! At festivals and stuff!” Reaching down into the pile, Usagi pulled out another candy bar for herself. “We can go, if you want! There’s a festival with fireworks next month! You have to promise to buy me cotton candy, though.”

“No problem…” If Seiya and Taiki weren’t still so awe-struck, they would’ve gotten shocked at what Yaten just said. “I’ll buy you all the cotton candy you want if we can see these again.”

“Really? Great! We’ll definitely go together then!” Usagi seemed more than happy with the deal, grinning to herself in her chair.

Seiya was eventually able to pull her gaze away from the sky and to Usagi. “Thanks for inviting us, Bunhead. I mean it. That was one of the best things I’ve ever seen.” Her voice was full of an honest, raw sincerity. A tone she usually only had when it came to senshi business, but the fireworks had cut right into Seiya’s very soul. Each burst of light seemed to implant itself into her heart.

“I’m really glad you all liked it so much!” Usagi reassured Seiya, nodding her head along with her words. “This was really fun. Seeing you guys get all excited about the fireworks made me love them even more. Hopefully the festival’s fireworks will be just as good.”

“Hopefully.” Seiya agreed.

“Well, now that the fireworks are done.” Standing up and clapping her hands together, Usagi drew the attention of the rest of the girls. “It’s time for the super, extra fun time to start!” All three of the Starlights were snapped out of their post-fireworks bliss as they realized the peaceful tranquility the fireworks had brought them was about to be ruined. The smile Usagi had on her face looked innocent, but there was some unlying current about it that made all their stomachs turn. It could only mean trouble.

“Super extra fun time?” Seiya asked.

“Yep! Now that the fireworks have happened, the next New Year’s event is to watch the first sunrise together! So, in order to stay awake until then, we’ll have to play lots of fun games!”

Taiki seemed taken aback, sputtering in her chair. “The sun won’t rise for nearly six more hours!”

“That’s why we play games!” Usagi chipperly reminded her.

“No way! No way in hell!” Yaten did a complete one eighty. The serene calm she had been feeling after the fireworks was completely gone. “I’m not staying up for another six hours. I’d rather die!”

“Oh! Good idea, Yaten!” Usagi sat down, completely ignoring Yaten’s rage as she grabbed a bag of chips. Her barbeque chips. “The first game we’ll play will be Would You Rather!” From her seat, Yaten let out a distressed scream and buried her head under her multitudes of blankets. “Taiki, you’ll go first!” A bewildered looking Taiki turned her head to Usgai. “Would you rather date Ami or Mako?”

Taiki’s face became a deep shade of red as her mouth became a thin white line. Seiya was barely holding it together in her chair, trying so hard not to burst out laughing in that very moment. Yaten was curled under her blankets, cursing Seiya for making her come tonight. Usagi - pointedly ignoring all of their reactions - eagerly awaited an answer, all while continuing to munch on her chips with a wide grin.

New Year’s was always better with friends.

And food.

New Year’s was always better with friends and food.

#fic #oof #i felt so nervous posting this #i really hope you liked it #sailor moon #usagi tsukino #seiya kou #taiki kou #yaten kou #sailor starlights #fanfiction #thanks for reading!#same prompt party

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uh-drarry · 4 years

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Can i ask what the difference between ace and aro is? If not thats totally fine! I was just curious, have a lovely day ♥️

Of course!! I hope you are having a lovely day as well, nonnie. Thanks for the ask! I’m not an expert but I have done a lot of research since realizing I was both ace and aro but I only recently realized this within the last six months so I’m going to give kind of broad terms and they both definitely have more definitive terms depending on the person using them. Ace is short for Asexual. Aro is short for Aromantic. (As I type this Aromantic is showing as a spelling error, and if that doesn’t tell you anything about how underrepresented that community is idk what will). This got a bit long, so I am putting it all under the cut.

Asexual people feel little to no sexual attraction. The opposite of this is Allosexual, meaning you do feel sexual attraction. Asexual is an umbrella term and there’s many micro labels under it as well. This doesn’t mean aces don’t have a libido though. Some people have high or low libidos and are still Ace because it’s about sexual attraction. Asexual people sometimes define themselves as one of the following, sex favorable (does enjoy sex, but possibly won’t initiate it themselves, or they could live without it but are happy to partake as far as I understand), sex positive (this can mean the previous, or, like me, they encourage others to have sex if they want it, and believe safe sex should be taught, etc.), sex neutral (they might enjoy sex, but eh, that’s cool if they never do it again, or ever), and sex repulsed (might get nauseous at the thought of it, never wants to partake, depending who they are they might not want to see it, hear it, watch it, etc even within media, nothing). Back to feeling or not feeling sexual attraction, for example, I have never once looked at, say Chris Hemsworth or Zendaya, and thought “Yeah, they turn me on, I’d have sex with them.” (Honestly the fact that I really had to think to come up with names there, which I think it very telling, I’m laughing at myself). *oversharing probably but trying to help people understand, sorry* Despite the my lack of sexual attraction to anyone, I do feel things, for example, when I read smut or something similar. Ace people might get themselves off, have sex, or never do anything of the sort down there. That kind of thing is about feeling good, you don’t have to think your partner or whatever is sexy in order to do that. If anyone wants to do their own research, AVEN.com (Asexual Visibility and Education Network) is probably a good starting point, or I can rec some blogs here.

Aromantic people feel little to no romantic attraction. Very different from feeling sexual attraction, yes? Basically, take all of what I wrote about being Ace and exchange sex with romance and that’s an aromantic person. I will explain anyway. Just like allosexual, alloromantic people are people who do feel romantic attraction. Romantic attraction is when you want to do romantic coded things with people. Of course romance is a bit harder to define than sex, so it can mean a lot of things to different people. Kissing can be seen as romantic to one person, and another aro person could really enjoy kissing others for example. Personally, I get pretty uncomfortable in romantic situations regarding myself and someone else, which I would probably define as being Romance Repulsed. After learning what this term meant and reading some about it, I really thought of my experiences. I’m pretty sure I’ve never had a crush on anyone, relationships (the brief two that I’ve had) really just felt like friendships. I didn’t initiate anything besides maybe handholding because I didn’t know what to do, or I didn’t even realize that was a thing that most people in that situation would be doing at that point in a relationship. I felt very uncomfortable when a ex tried to take a kiss further than a peck, among other things. Again, being Aromantic doesn’t mean aro people automatically will never have or want romantic relationships. They just don’t feel those feels for people usually. Like AVEN for asexuals, there’s Arocalypse.com for aro people. I have less blogs to rec here, but I can rec some if someone wants it.

There are good examples of different types of attraction, I personally feel platonic attraction which would be the desire to be someone’s friend, as well as aesthetic attraction which is defined below.

People can be one, or both, or neither. I am both, AroAce. People in these communities often use the Split Attraction Model (SAM). Which would be like someone stating that they are Asexual Homoromantic, or Aromantic Heterosexual, or Aromantic Pansexual, among many other combos.

Because I do feel aesthetic attraction, pretty much solely towards women, I define myself as an Oriented AroAce, or Lesbian AroAce. If I ever did end up in a relationship with someone, I can only ever imagine it to be with a woman. Again though, that’s just one microlable among so many that are out there.

This is a huge list of identities and labels, it overwhelms be tbh, but I’m linking it here anyway because it’s very informative.

I assume this ask was in response my reblog here. Yes I get very annoyed when people treat these two orientations as the same thing, despite me identifying as both. As I hope you can now see, they are very different things. A lot of the time, I enjoy reading about romance and sometimes sexual relationships, but sometimes I want to read other peoples thoughts, fics, posts, etc about only one of these and the Aro/Aromanticism tag is flooded with posts about asexuality which really doesn’t help people who are trying to learn about aromanticism or wanting specific content.

One more point before I wrap this up. I read a book because I wanted to see if it’d help me know for sure if I was demisexual (definition can be found in the huge list I linked two paragraphs up, or on google), and it actually made me realize I was aroace and I am forever grateful for it so I will rec it here. It’s called Loveless by @aliceoseman and it has quickly become my favorite book. So if anyone wants to read about a fictional character realizing they’re aroace, this is a fantastic book. I related so much to Georgia, it’s crazy. Also her other works are fantastic.

Remember you are not alone! Experts believe that 1% of the population is ace (and I think it’s the same for aro people) and that might sound like no one but, guys, theres 7.8 billion people on this planet. That means theres 78 million people like us! I ended up finding a lot of ace people to follow on twitter as well by the way.

This might be a hot take to some but the A in LGBTQIA+ does not mean ally! It’s for Asexual, Aromantic, and Agender! And we do belong in the queer community because the queer community is for people who aren’t straight, cis, or amatonormative. Wow, I hope this all makes sense, if any of you are confused or have more thoughts, or I messed something up, UNLESS YOU’RE BEING APHOBIC, add your thoughts, or message me!

Side note: Do please send me recs of people to follow, books, fics, shows, whatever, I am always searching for new content within these orientations!

#this was a lot #I've spent more than an hour on this lol #asexual #asexuality #ace #aro #aromantic #aromanticism #split attraction model #queer #lgbtqia #lgbtqia+#aven #arocalypse

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katierosefun · 3 years

Note

Go Back Couple made me cry it was so sweet and wholesome ;-;;; and it was really clever too! And I thought it said a lot about people it really made me think about how we really see only one or two sides of someone else in a relationship. I saw Hospital Playlist at the start of quarantine and I spent the whole time just being “I miss my friends!!” bc it has such beautiful friendships and platonic relationships (and cute romances too)

Also if you have more recs please share bc once this quarter finishes I really want to watch more dramas I’m collecting recs ^^

ooooh, i just read the plot of go back couple and i’m so curious, and i’ve added it to my to watch lost! and yessss, i’ve been meaning to watch hospital playlist! i think i watched the first 10 minutes of the first episode, but i never got around to continuing, but i most certainly will resume my watch once finals finish for me too :’))

oh yes, but as for more recs...well, there’s this list that i compiled a few months back, but since then, i’ve been thinking of other kdramas i’ve watched and liked, so...below the cut!

1. penthouse (1 & 2, renewed for a season 3, which will be coming in june!)

where to watch: viki (although with some kind of plus plan, but if you don’t have plus,,,here’s a place where you could theoretically watch)

favorite track on the ost: idk, i haven’t really been paying attention to the ost because like...this kdrama is also so incredibly focused on opera / classical music, and it’s actually introduced me to a lot of wonderful pieces, one of my faves being mozart’s die zauberflote.

listen: it usually takes me a hysterically long time to get through a new kdrama, but i was so invested that i got through the first season (complete with 21 episodes!)n within like,,,two or three weeks, and i have about 3 episodes left of the second season (which has 13 episodes!). this kdrama is just that good. it’s basically about these families living at this super fancy apartment complex called hera palace (which is fitting...hera, the queen of the gods, also the goddess of maternity...). honestly, there’s so much going on in this kdrama that it’s kind of hard to explain everything that happens, but essentially, the show opens up with the murder of a young orphan girl and works backwards from there. we learn about each of the families’ secrets, ambitions, and some really shocking twists and turns along the way.

honestly, i’m surprised by how much i love this kdrama. there aren’t a whole ton of likable characters--literally almost every character is deeply flawed and obvious about it, but honestly, the complexity and layers built into each character is worth it. we really see how environments shape people, especially with each of the family’s children. we see all these moralities clash with each other, and we see how greed and ambition can muddy those waters, even amongst the children. i’ve been super enjoying season 2 especially, because we’re learning even more, not to mention that i’ve been so surprised by the level of character development going on here. i won’t spoil anything, but like...it’s wonderful and impressive, and i cannot believe this kdrama has me actually rooting for certain characters. also, on another note: this kdrama does a lot with addressing exactly how far a parent would go for their kid--and it’s bonkers and wonderful. honestly...an addictive kdrama, full of suspense and drama and with deeply complex characters.

a fair warning: this kdrama is rated r, although i’m learning that rated r in south korea would probably pass off as pg-13 in the us--there’s more explicit scenes of violence, really harsh bullying, murder (of course), and implied sex scenes (nothing ever shown, very much a “camera pulls away” situation).

2. pinocchio

where to watch: viki

favorite track to the ost: pinocchio by roy kim

okay, this kdrama is...just really sweet, and again: i liked it a lot more than i thought i would? it’s a little older, like it started airing in 2014--but i just...really liked it. it’s about these two people from separate families (but they grow up together under the same roof, it’s a whole complicated thing), and both of them become reporters. the only issue is that one of the characters has pinocchio syndrome, which is basically that she can’t tell a lie without hiccupping. you’d think this makes for a goofy drama because of that, but this kdrama def. has a lot of heavyhanded/serious moments. it’s so weird to think this kdrama aired in 2014, just because i think a lot of the themes--all of them about truth and what counts as the truth especially in journalism--feel still so relevant today.

this kdrama also has a lot to say about generational trauma/the burdens we inherit from our parents and our older siblings, and it also has a lot of stuff about taking responsibility for the sins of our parents, etc. it’s so wonderfully and beautifully done, and i’m honestly...again, surprised by just how deeply they ran with this concept. the romance is also cute, although i’ll def. admit there’s some stuff that still makes me “???” but overall, i really enjoyed the actors’ chemistry with each other, and i was still satisfied with the ending!

3. fight for my way

where to watch: viki

favorite track on the ost: i don’t think this kdrama has too much of an ost? and i don’t think i was paying attention to the ost in this kdrama either, oops

i’m still watching this kdrama / have i think 5 episodes left of this kdrama, but i’ve been really enjoying it so far! it’s following the story of these four twentysomethings, and they all have these big dreams for themselves. unfortunately, they’re also twentysomethings, and achieving their dreams is...kind of hard. honestly, this kdrama is just so wholesome, and it has its serious moments, but i really love it. the friendships in this kdrama are solid, and the romance is super sweet, and it’s very much so the classic childhood friends to lovers that just makes me :’))

also, just like...it’s hopeful. and empowering. and just like, seeing characters go “i know this is hard for me to achieve and i know it would make so much more sense for me to just sit down with my head low and quietly accept where i am, but i’m going to pursue my dream anyways” just...idk, i feel like it’s a kdrama that a lot of young dreamers can relate to, and i really need to finish this kdrama, but it’s...really sweet and relatable.

4. space sweepers

where to watch: netflix

okay, so this isn’t a kdrama, but i need to rec this movie because it’s...so good. this is a science fiction film following this crew of...space sweepers. basically, earth is now uninhabitable/unsafe to live in, and the wealthy are all living on a repurposed mars. (bro doesn’t that sound familiar?)

in order to get money, a lot of people risk their lives by cleaning up debris still floating around orbit. these people are known as space sweepers, and they’re basically space janitors, only with a lot more flying and swearing. this crew winds up accidentally getting ahold of this mysterious child, who may or may not have a huge bounty on her head. i won’t go any deeper than that, but...this movie is so wonderful for its found family elements, and each character has such an interesting background, and i’m honestly surprised by how this movie went so deep into each character in such a short amount of time? (although honestly i would 1000/10 want a netflix series following each character’s lives just because)

admittedly, there’s some issues i have with this movie--like, idk, one character wears dreadlocks, and i’m just :/// about that, because :///// it really shows that south korea isn’t exempt from cultural appropriation. i still like the character, and i still like the movie overall, but that’s just a heads-up.

but besides that, this movie is really good at showing how sometimes the villain is just a wealthy old white dude, and sometimes family can really just be a ragtag team of outcasts, and sometimes it is really the younger generation that can literally bring hope and etc. it’s very much :’))

and that’s all i’ve got! thank u for asking me about kdramas, because...as you can tell: many thoughts.

#answered #i have....so many kdramas to watch too #like hospital playlist and king eternal monarch are def. kdramas i need to resume watching #and i've also....steadily been making my way through romance is a bonus book although i still don't really know how to feel about it #it's cute but i don't have too many thoughts/enough thoughts on it #i've just been watching a lot of lee jong suk's kdramas let's be real #i've also been meaning to watch what's wrong with secretary kim? because i remember liking it but i've only watched the first 3 eps #so i wasn't sure whether to rec it #tbh check back on me in a few months and i'll def. have more kdramas to rec asdfsfasdf #i now have the yearly viki plus plan and as you can tell: i am using it

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plasticflowering · 4 years

Text

Ranking Every ONEUS Song Because I Have Opinions

I guess it’s time for me to embark upon this task. Come along for the ride if you’re so inclined.

This is by no means a definitive ranking, because that’s impossible and the consumption of music is an intrinsically personal experience. But I personally like ranking things for arbitrary reasons.

Each song is ranked in order, and within those rankings I’ve assigned Tiers. Enjoy.

Note: this includes only studio tracks officially released by RBW or KissEnt, which means I’m sadly not including the Road to Kingdom songs. Actually, wait, you wanna know what? The real reason I’m not including Road to Kingdom songs is because I’m still salty that my favorite song from that show is one that didn’t get a studio release. Justice for Warrior’s Descendant.

Let’s begin.

I’ll start things off with the top tier, the best of the best, my absolute favorite ONEUS songs. Now what should I name a tier that represents the pinnacle of what ONEUS can offer us?

Black-Haired Seoho Tier

1. “Valkyrie”

This song goes places. It's the one that made me fall in love with ONEUS and it's still my favorite, oops.

2. “Blue Sky”

"Blue Sky” defies genre to me. The first time I heard it, I was blown away. It has some of my favorite vocals AND two of my favorite raps in their discography - I love Leedo and Ravn's "ballad raps" in general but this is my favorite.

3. “BingBing”

So full of personality. Such an earworm. Emotional and kinda unsetlling lyrics. Xion speaking French? OKAY. It's title track worthy, for sure, so it's a shame it gets so overlooked by casual listeners. I’m glad the fanbase has at least given it the legendary status it deserves.

4. “Lost”

Was not expecting this one to enter my top ten with turbo boosters, but I started to listen to it a lot last year and in the process I started to feel things for this song that I previously have only felt for “Blue Sky”

5. “Plastic Flower”

It me.

6. “Rewind"

It’s all about the synth hook, to me. I am pathetically manipulable where good synth hooks are concerned. Also, the cadence and arrangement of this song reminds me of “Lost” and that’s never a bad thing.

7. “Dizzy”

I just feel like this is where they all shine as a vocal ensemble. Their personalities shine through in Dizzy, and I'm a sucker for that emotive sort of performing.

8. “Incomplete"

Right in a row here, you’ve got two sets of “my favorite song on the album” followed by “what I believe to be the best song on the album”. “Incomplete” is the best song on “DEVIL”. The lyrics are amazing and, this may sound weird, but as a Human in Their Thirties the lyrics hit even harder. Bonus points for guitar, as always.

9. “Dead or Alive”

I’ll never get over how strange and wonderful this song is, and yes I do believe it’s the best song on “LIVED”. (Vee shouts through a megaphone again about how “Dead or Alive” incorporates musical themes or lyrical elements from every other song on “LIVED” and hopes someone listens). Also (vee voice) guitars.

10. “Lit”

“Lit” just rules and I don’t believe there’s much I can add that has not already been said about it

Leedo Face Scrunch Tier

Now for those songs that are still my favorites, and make the world an immensely better place for existing, but don’t quite crack the ultimate ONEUS songs pantheon.

11. “No Diggity”

I'm a simple person, okay? I love bright and poppy songs but I'm also weak for unapologetic bangers, and "No Diggity" is an UNAPOLOGETIC BANGER. I think the guitars are (unsurprisingly) what takes this song to the next level for me. The arrangement in general is so impressive, and it’s obvious that they balanced it well to make use of all the members’ individual strengths. RIP my bias though.

12. “Crazy & Crazy”

The "Crazy & Crazy" appreciator has logged on! When Ravn said "hakuna matata 원하면 이뤄져 bibbidi-bobbidi-BOO", I felt that!!! If I ever get to go to a ONEUS concert and god forbid meet any of you there, I cannot be held responsible for how HAM I will go during this song.

13. “Hide and Seek”

I’m weak for this funky little bass-driven bop.

14. “Red Thread”

I don’t ever feel like I truly have gone in hard for a group until I start proselytizing their ballads to my unsuspecting friends. Ballads have a high barrier of entry in K-Pop especially, but my god!! MY GOD!!! This is a god-tier ballad.

15. “808″

They threw every single synth possible at the wall with “808″ and it absolutely sends me with how well it works. It’s undeniably “a Japanese single,” if you know what I mean, but even with that I think it’s one of their strongest title tracks. The chorus is endlessly singable, too, and that means a lot to me while I’m listening to it while doing the dishes, which I do a lot.

16. “Leftover”

I believe that Seoho and Ravn team songwriting will save our souls, and this song is one more reason to do so. I love that their songs aren’t just straight-up R&B (not that I don’t love R&B), and that there’s something very playful and unique about them.

17. “Zig Zag”

I’ll never forget you, “Zig Zag,” or the way Keonhee absolutely owns your vocals. In fact, if I had to assign an image song to every member I would most likely assign “Zig Zag” to Keonhee. 18. “Lion Heart"

As far as “weird little song” vibes go, “Lion Heart” really wins. Has undoubtedly one of the weirdest moments in any ONEUS song in the first post-chorus, and I’ll never shut up about the implied lore associations.

19. “Hero”

In every ToMoon's life, there is that indelible moment when they first heard Seoho's pre-pre-chorus vocals on "Hero" and suddenly realized so much about life and love and the nature of miracles. And, less dramatically, I love a good rap that uses the word biscuit.

Road to Kingdom Era Xion Tier

I became a Xion bias in Road to Kingdom era, so this is not meant disparagingly. These are those songs that show so much promise and goodness, and make me love them, but are kind of an acquired taste so to speak.

20, “BBUSYEO”

I always love BBUSYEO when it shuffles up, but I never like... seek it out, you know? Even if it is a bop. It’s just a silly little hetero love song that includes toilet humor, and it goes. I love that for it!

21. “Come Back Home”

It's all about the build up here. This song has such a beautiful arrangement that builds to something, dare I say, epic. Good background music for taking a dramatic walk when it’s like, -this- close to raining.

22. “To Be Or Not To Be”

This song works in the context of ONEUS mythology and lore but I tend not to really put it on my playlists if I'm simply wanting to experience an emotion or bust out some fun jams. It is a very strange time signature for a jam, but it’s too up-tempo to really be a mood setter.

23. “Intro: Time"

This intro is like... beautiful, but also kind of slutty, and I love that?

24. “A Song Written Easily”

It's good! It's fun! I really like it, I think it's lovely. But it’s not a song I’m going to rec to a friend and assume it will give them an adequate view of what ONEUS is. If anything I’d expect they’d just be like “that was really fun, but it just makes me want to listen to Blood Sweat & Tears.” “and I’d go “yeah me too.”

25. “Twilight”

I overplayed the fuck out of this song when I was first getting into ONEUS, so forgive me for ranking it low. Also, there is a high barrier of entry here for casual listeners even if it is a classic. Do you ever really think about how weird “Twilight” is? Like, the song structure? It’s very weird. I love it.

26. “Stand By”

I decided to make "Stand By" my charity case after seeing a few people dismiss it as their least favorite off Fly With Us, and I wound up loving it so much. That bridge is crazy good! Vocal line blessing us.

27. “Intro: Fly Me to the Moon”

As far as intros go, this is god tier honestly. But it's still only an intro, and I always feel cheated out of a beautiful full song when I hear this. Like, even for an INTRO it feels short.

My Complicated Feelings About A Thousand Stars Tier

28. “A Thousand Stars”

I just made an entirely separate post about this.

That Overenthusiastic Thicc Ssam Ravn Made for Seoho That One Time Tier

Like, there’s a lot here. I like all the parts individually but something about them just doesn’t go down easily.

29. “Youth”

I’ll be honest, I love “Youth” and I think it’s an absolutely beautiful song with a great hook. I’m just firmly out of the demographic for it at this point and that’s a bit alienating. It’s also weak compared to other songs on “DEVIL”

30. “Intro: Devil is in the Details”

It’s a great intro that does some ambitious things, but on its own it doesn’t hold up as well. Intimidating.

31. “Intro: Lived”

I love Leedo and Ravn, but I don't like how this one opens. That said, I love the way this ends.

32. “White Night”

The fact that I had to rank this so low, when it's such a gorgeous ballad, drives home how many pure bangers ONEUS has. I love this song, but I don't really jam out to it, so it's lower in my ranking.

33. “What you doing?”

Please don’t judge me too harshly for this. I just feel like this song could have been performed by another group and there would have been no appreciable difference. I like Cosmik’s songs, but they’re not, in my opinion. the most ONEUS of the ONEUS songs. Which is weird since Cosmik is a bit synonymous with ONEUS. Anyway Keonhee sounds great in this song.

34. “Now”

Same as above, but this one has the added problem of never really going anywhere. That said, the bridge slaps.

35. “Airplane”

I guess one of the proper tracks on Lived had to rank low, and for me it's definitely Airplane. When I listen to it, I have fun, but it's very... how do I put this nicely? Generic. The stages elevated it, absolutely, and otherwise it might rank even lower sadly.

36. “I.P.U.”

I don’t know how to put this nicely, but the only way I want to listen to this song is if ONEUS is singing it in concert, at which point I can imagine it being very emotional. It’s a special song for special occasions and I’m not going to listen to it to have fun.

37. “Outro: Connect with US”

You’d think I’d love the government-assigned SeoJo song, wouldn’t you? I mean, it’s okay.

38. “Eye Contact”

By the time this song hits the chorus, it always gets me and I love it. But the verses leave something to be desired imo. It is firmly a mid-tier song to me, and I feel like this particular musical formula was much better in “Now.” Also please don’t make eye contact with me I have social anxiety.

ZigZag’s Cursed Live Audio Tier

Unfortunate.

39. “Level Up”

WHY is this song so low??? Every time I hear it start I get so hyped up, but I feel like it never delivers on that hype fully. It feels too mid-tempo and generic for what the mix promises. I don't know. I can't explain it. The bridge doesn't lead up to much and that always feels like a betrayal. And because it has so much potential I’m even more disappointed about that.

40. “Intro: Light Us”

I have absolutely no opinion about this intro

41. “English Girl”

I’m way too queer and old for this song. :/

42. “In My Arms”

I don't feel their personalities at all in this song, which makes it stand out from almost all their other tracks. It just doesn't sound like a ONEUS song, to me.

43. “Kiseki”

A rare song that I skip when shuffling through the ONEUS discography

44. “Koisii”

The other rare song I skip when shuffling through the ONEUS discography, but also I would fight it if given the opportunity.

#v.opinions #this took... a couple of weeks #enjoy i guess #v.text

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fernwehbookworm · 4 years

Text

Haunted- Chapter 3

“I don’t know what to tell you Kar. There is no one here, no forced entry, nothing.”

“How do you explain the mirror then?” Kara paces in her apartment while her sister continues to check every corner of her apartment.

“I don’t know. There isn’t anything there anymore. Normally smudges like that will stay until you clean it, at least a little, but I tried to fog it up and it's as clean as a whistle.”

“I’m telling you, it was there.”

“I’m sure it was. You don’t overreact. But I don’t know what to tell you.”

Kara collapses on her couch groans, her head hurt from lack of sleep and stress. Kara pinches the bridge of her nose and scrunches her eyes tight. Kara feels her sister sit next to her.

“You can come stay with me. Kelly has been spending a lot of time at the office anyway, helping prep some new technology for Obsidian to release next year.”

“Yeah, yeah okay. I’m going to pack a bag real quick. Can Streaky come? It's supposed to storm all week.”

“The stray?”

“Is he really a stray when he lives his best life?”

Alex laughs “Yeah, he just conned you into feeding and housing him.”

“And he returns the favor with love and affection.” Kara looks at the cat in question, lounging on the loveseat, in a weak sunbeam, purring contentedly.

“If he makes you feel better then yes, bring him. But he pees on one thing and it's back outside.”

“He isn’t a dog, Alex. He goes in the litter box just fine.”

Alex makes a face but relents. Kara goes to pack some clothes and toiletries and Alex grabs the cat’s belongings. Kara was right, dark clouds were already descending upon the city to start the week of rain and storms.

With a bag over one shoulder and a cat under the other, Kara leaves her apartment with her sister. She could be overreacting, but the mirror thing was too creepy to ignore. And Kara had to work on this article, already Snapper was criticizing her rough drafts and decimenting her sentence structure. Kara was already dreading the emails she knows are piled in her inbox from her editor. Kara called off work and just knew Snapper would not be happy with it. In order to keep the screaming to a minimum, Kara was going to have to have the first draft done by tomorrow.

“Okay,” Alex says when they get to her apartment. “Will you be fine by yourself? I have to go to work.”

“Yes. I feel better already.” Kara lets Streaky go and he immediately lands and scurries off to explore the new space.

“If you need it, you still know the safe code right?”

Kara scrunches her nose, “Yes, not that I like guns.”

“You have a Federal Agent for a sister.” Alex rolls her eyes. “It's just in case. I don’t know what is happening but I want you to protect yourself if you need to.”

“I will, Al. Go on to work. I’m just going to work on my article. Maybe take a nap.”

“Yes, please sleep. You look exhausted. Help yourself to food too.” Alex kisses her sister’s forehead. “Goodbye, call me if you need anything.”

“I will. Be safe”

Alex flashes a smile before leaving. Kara does feel better here, in her sister's home. It's full of love and memories of game nights. Also, Kara knows where at least six weapons are hidden that Alex made sure that Kara (and now Kelly) were trained to use. Kara turns the lock on the door and raids the fridge for snacks and something to drink before settling into work.

After about two hours, Kara’s eyes are beginning to droop and her yawns are uncontainable. “Okay, 20-minute nap. Then right back to work.” Kara mumbles to herself.

Kara settles on Alex’s super comfortable sectional and pulls a blanket off the back of it. As soon as Kara is comfortable, Streaky jumps onto her stomach and begins to purr. Kara runs her hands through soft fur and allows the motion and vibration to lull her into a much needed nap.

Welcome to the Hotel California

Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)

Such a lovely face

Plenty of room at the Hotel California

Any time of year (any time of year)

You can find it here

Kara wakes with a start. The warmth on her stomach is gone and there is music playing.

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted

She got the Mercedes Benz, uh

She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys

That she calls friends

How they dance in the courtyard

Sweet summer sweat

Some dance to remember

Some dance to forget

Kara locates the record player that Streaky is sitting next to and intensely staring at as the record spins round and round. He must have turned it on by accident. The cat tended to be too curious for his own good. With a sigh, Kara stands and goes to turn it off, picking up the car and moving him to the floor. Streaky protests but Kara ignores him. Upon inspection, nothing seems damaged. If Alex would kick Streaky out for peeing on something, she would shoot him for scratching one of her vinyl records.

Awake now, Kara sets back to work, determined to at least finish the first draft before five. Around noon, Kara helps herself to leftovers in Alex's fridge and continues working. Kara is deep into her final paragraphs when the TV clicks on, blaring sound. Kara practically leaps from her chair as the creepy piano plays.

You unlock this door with the key of imagination.

Beyond it is another dimension- a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind.

You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas.

You've just crossed over into . . . the Twilight Zone.

Kara feels as if her heart is beating in her throat and her stomach has fallen through the floor. Streaky is on the back of the couch, half laying on the remote.

"Boy… are you trying to scare me to death?" Kara laughs to herself and rescues the remote from under the cat and turns off the TV. Just ten more minutes of work and she will be done. Sending it off to Snapper to be covered in notes and changes and insults. But that is a problem for tomorrow. Tonight, Kara is going to make dinner for her sister and her sister's girlfriend and try and put this morning behind her.

Kara must be more tired then she thinks she is, even with the nap she had. All while making dinner she drops half a dozen utensils and misplaces just as many things. She could have sworn the bell peppers were right next to the cutting board as she chopped the carrots, but when she went to grab them they were on the counter behind her next to the stove. The peeler fell to the floor without Kara even touching it and the sharp knife followed a few minutes later, almost striking her foot on its dangerous journey down.

Kara was clumsy and a bit forgetful at the best of times, adding in only about eight hours of sleep in the last forty-eight hours, and Kara was a God damn hazard. But Kara was determined to make this chicken stir fry as a 'Thank you' to her sister. By 6:30 everything is done and staying warm in the oven and Kara waits for Alex, her sister had texted her about fifteen minutes ago that Alex was leaving work. Kelly would be about an hour more. Another ding of Kara's phone. Kara checks and it's a text from Jess, letting her know that L-Corp released more information to the reporters.

Kara decides to browse the new information while she waits. Picking up the green pen she had taken from L-Corp, Kara sets to taking more notes. She always found it was better to handwrite things first, it helps the information sink into her brain before transferring it to a digital format. Movement out of the side of her eye breaks Kara from her concentration. With a gasp, Kara sees Lena pacing by Alex's balcony door. But as soon as Kara focuses on her, Lena is gone with a blink. A chill passes down Kara's spine. Kara throws down her pen and tries to calmly walk to the kitchen for some water.

"I'm just overtired. That's it. Too focused." Kara mumbles to herself between sips of the cool liquid.

"Hey!" Alex calls and Kara jumps with a small yelp.

Alex throws her a questioning look from the front door and immediately scans the apartment for danger. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Fine. Just been working too hard I think."

"You really need to take time off."

"I know. I know. This is just such a crucial time. Anyway… dinner is ready. Chicken stir fry."

Alex's face softens from the concerned big sister to an appreciative hungry woman. "Great, Kelly said she won't be home until like 7:30 now so it's just us.

"So… Sister Night?"

"Sister Night" Alex confirms.

Kara squeals and grabs bowls to load with the medley of rice, vegetables, and protein. Alex grabs glasses for wine and heads into the living room to que up the newest season of Umbrella Academy. They watched the first season together and pinky swore to only watch the second together also.

After an episode, Alex gathers the dishes and disappears into the kitchen. She returns with a pint of Ben and Jerry's for each of them, allowing her sister to pick first. They swap halfway through the containers and Kara hums in satisfaction as she scraps the last of the melted ice cream from the bottom.

Kara ignores the fact that Alex keeps checking her phone. She's waiting on Kelly who is now half an hour later then she said she would be. It isn't until the end of the third episode that Kelly finally makes it home. Alex leaves Kara on the couch as they hear the front door open and the sound of bags hitting the floor and shows roughly kicked off.

"Hey babe! Kara made dinner. You hungry?" Kara hears Alex call.

"No thank you. I'm just tired. But I could go for a glass of wine."

"Coming right up."

Kara can hear the two in the kitchen now, talking quietly as Kara scrolls through her phone, waiting on them to come back. Alex sits in the middle of the couch, Kelly tucks herself into the corner and stretches her feet onto her girlfriend's lap. Kara resumes her position of her head on Alex's shoulder and their arms intertwined. Alex switches the show to something less intense and the Parks and Rec theme song starts.

Kara can feel the vibrations of Alex talking to Kelly about their days against her cheek. Between that and the familiarity of the show's dialogue, Kara can soon feel herself slipping deeper into unconsciousness.

Lena is alone in the lab. It's late, darkness permeates the lab except for the lights around where Lena is working. Lena types vigorously at her laptop, brow furrowed in concentration. Lights are blinking on the machine behind her. Lena is mumbling under her breath. Kara laughs but it sounds weird, muffled.

“Hey, Lena.”

Lena doesn't respond, just continues to type away. From behind her ear, Lena produces a pen to begin writing. A green pen. With gold trim. The very pen Kara had acquired from L-Corp. After a few, what Kara can only assume is, equations, Lena cries out. Kara jumps with the rudeness of it, but then a giant grin spreads on Lena’s face. Lena begins to giggle excitedly while she inputs something into her computer and then Lena practically skips over to the machine and flips switches and turns dials. Then Lena runs back to her computer and the large machine begins to hum, lights flash. Quickly, Lena grabs an apple from next to her computer and places it on the small platform in the middle of the center hole.

Lena is fixated on the apple, only looking away to check her computer. Lena is so focused, Kara smiles to herself. It’s really cute. Kara stays back and watches the scene unfold. She feels excitement build in her chest, matching the excitement on Lena’s face.

Out of the corner of her eye, Kara sees a shadow move. It slides between desks and chairs, nearly shapeless and silent. Lights from the machines make a beacon in the near darkness, making the shadow even harder to see. Lena’s back is to it as she inches closer to the machine. Then the shadow materializes into a human form, completely shrouded head to toe. It reaches a handout and turns a dial out of Lena's eye line. Kara cries out but Lena can't hear her. The shadow slinks back into the darkness and is gone. Something changes in the hum of the machine. The light that had been circling the apple in the opening began to increase speed. Lights began to blink rapidly all over the network of technology. Lena's glee was slowly morphing into terror. Bright white light is building from the center and the hum has turned into more of a whine as it builds.

"No! No, no, no, no!" Lena exclaims as she scrambles to start turning switches and dials to turn off the machine. But it's too late. The damage has been done.

Kara has to close her eyes against the harshness of the light and feels herself get blown backward by the concussive force of whatever is happening. By the time she can see again, Lena is gone. The room is left in the same devastated state that Kara saw when she first arrived at L-Corp.

"Lena!" Kara yells, waking herself up.

Kara looks around to get her bearings. Alex and Kelly are still sitting on the couch next to her, staring at her in concern. Kara leans forward and rests her elbows on her knees, bearing her face in her hands and taking deep breaths. After a moment she can feel Alex rubbing circles between her shoulder blades.

"Bad dream?" Alex asks softly.

Kara nods and continues to try and calm her racing heart.

After a few minutes, Kelly softly asks, "Who's Lena?"

Kara must have yelled out loud and that's what woke her. "The woman I'm doing a story on. The CEO of L-Corp. She died in a lab accident. Well they assume. There isn't a body."

"And are you stressed about that?" Kelly probs gently.

"Yeah. I haven't been able to sleep. I've been up late working and then when I do sleep, I have dreams about her."

"Are they all nightmares?"

"No. Sometimes it's just like she is there in whatever weird dream I'm having. Sometimes we sit and have a conversation. Sometimes in my apartment, sometimes in the lab. That was the first nightmare."

Kara finally looks at her sister and Kelly. Alex looks concerned but Kelly has on her very serious face. The 'I'm psychoanalyzing someone' face.

"Is that the only time you see her?"

"Are you shrinking me right now?" Kara asks with a laugh.

Kelly makes a face at Kara's term. "I'm concerned that my girlfriend's sister is showing signs of stress-related anxiety."

Kara relents. "No. I keep seeing her out of the corner of my eye. Passing by a window, sitting next to me. Across the room. Just snatches. When I focus on her she's gone. It’s so weird. Like, I never knew her but somehow I’ve imagined entire conversations with her.”

Kelly is quiet for a moment. When Kara looks over at her, Kelly and Alex seem to be having a silent conversation with their eyes. A few nods and Kelly’s eyebrows furrow, Kara can’t see Alex’s face but assumes she is being just as expressive. With a huff of air, Alex turns back to her sister and continues to rub between Kara’s shoulder blades.

“Kara I really think you need to take time off. This amount of stress is not healthy. And this is not a healthy reaction to the death of a stranger.”

“I know. I told Alex I would after the article is submitted I would. But Lena, she deserves this. She deserves to be remembered for all the good she has done. Not for the awful crimes of her brother. Did you know she sponsors several group homes in National City? Not L-Corp, Lena does, personally. She even uses those homes to look for interns and to give scholarships to teens. I just… I can’t let her be forgotten. And all those other reporters, they are just going to twist the story. Or give bare-bone facts. I promised Jess and all the other employees I would write this. I can’t stop now.”

“You don’t have to. But look, maybe you can come to Obsidian tomorrow. We are working on this new virtual reality tech and how it can be used in therapy. Maybe I can help you get past this so you can sleep.”

“But I have to…” Kara trails off when she sees the glare from her sister. “Yeah, okay. I’ll come first thing. Then maybe I can still finish reading through this new research and get a copy to Snapper.”

“Good. It’s settled. I’m going to shower. Alex, get your sister a bed made up on the couch so that she might get some sleep. Goodnight, Kara.”

“Night, Kelly.”

When Kelly is gone, Alex wraps her sister up in a tight hug. “Don’t work yourself to death. I need my sister.” Alex kisses Kara’s forehead and then stands to get the extra blankets and a pillow from the closet.

“And I need mine. That’s why I am here. And your brain doctor girlfriend is going to fix me right up.” Kara tries to joke but it falls a little flat. Alex tries to smile but it looks more like a grimace.

“Sleep tight. We are just in the next room if you need us. Please, wake me up if you need anything.”

“I will. Goodnight, Al.” Kara settles under the fluffy blanket and rests her head on the pillow.

Alex moves about, checking locks and turning off lights before finally retiring to her bedroom. Kara can soon hear the shower turn off and Kelly and Alex talking in the bedroom. It’s too soft to make out words but the drone of it is comforting and Kara is soon slipping back into unconsciousness.

#supergirl #supercorp #scbb2020 #scbb #Fanfiction #Au #Haunted

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xueyangapologist · 5 years

Text

oh here’s the Good Omens fic rec i conned two people into asking me for so i could feel like the absurd amount of fic reading i do is useful somehow. sectioned off by how i think about them in mine own brain.

there’s a section for fics written pre-show but i haven’t separated all of them. i’ve also included warnings where i thought it was necessary but mostly i’m trusting that everyone knows how to check ratings and tags.

section: favourites

A Backwards Proposal

But then, suddenly, the sun would shine on the angel’s hair, or a certain smell would remind Crowley of this or that sunset in Rome with a flagon of wine, or maybe they would just look each other in the eye, and Crowley’s chest would constrict, and he would wish he could die young like a tragic romantic poet or a young woman who had happened to be caught in a rainstorm once, and whose delicate condition just wouldn’t let her live.

After

After all that, after the apocalypse that wasn’t, after everything, could Crowley stutter through saying anything other than best friend? What was the point, when Aziraphale would never respond in kind?

The Temptation of Aziraphale, or How to Lose a Flaming Sword Without Really Trying

He was Here. The Source of his Agony. And surely something was really dotty in his head because he was starting to think in all capitals.

Different (and its sequels)

“Do you like me?” he wanted to ask. “No, I know you don’t like me, at least, I don’t think you do, except that maybe— But everybody likes me, why don’t you like me? What should I do differently? D’you ever feel, Aziraphale, like you’re one of the only guys around that really gets what this whole love thing is about? Everybody talks about it so bluntly, but surely there’s feeling in it, right? You have feelings, like I do? My feelings, do they sound real to you? Because I don’t know if they are.”

crowley/aziraphale is happening, just in the background at first, don’t worry. i need someone else to read this with me so desperately

the rest is under a read more because it got Too Bloody Long

section: toothrot

An Artless Proposal

“Every dame appreciates a ring.”

Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy

"Oh yeah," said Crowley quickly. "Loads. All the time."

some new beginning

The back rooms and the first-floor bedroom were cluttered with vases, and the green bastards seemed to like it better here than they had at Crowley’s flat. He didn’t count a single wilted leaf between the lot of them. Traitors.

section: halfway between the above and below sections, or: big dumb demon has praise kink make me cry

The One in Which Crowley Discovers Wanking

“Oh! They’re still doing the rumpty-tumpty wrong!”

section: are we still calling it pwp?

Really Weird Things

Blow jobs were often the easiest way to fulfill his Lust quota and had the effect of causing huge political scandals when Crowley got caught hard at work, which, considering that the results were very funny, was quite often.

based on a quote from the book, which makes this one terry and neil’s fault

section: sort of has a plot

An Invitation To Ruin

"That's fucking weird, that is," Crowley muttered, then cleared his throat and repeated in a more angelic voice, "My goodness, this is ever so odd."

technically a sequel to I Got You To Help Me Forgive, which is good, but i like this one slightly better

you smiled (and it broke my heart)

It was quite some time later, after Crowley realised he was somewhere along the A82 in Scotland and still not feeling any better, that he decided he did not want to clear his head of Aziraphale anyway.

section: actually has a plot

Mirror, Mirror

The angel of the Western Gate’s wings rustled behind her as she turned her gaze from the sunset on the still-clear horizon to the serpent behind her.

canon universe collides with a universe where crawly talked to the wrong angel. only explaining that because I thought at first it would be set entirely in the alternate universe, and that made me so sad I nearly didn’t read it.

section: in the beginning there were only 12 good fics in this fandom and i’ve read all of them

Heaven Has No Taste

"It is not given to us to know the Ineffable Plan," the Metatron sing-songed.

please note that a homophobic slur is used in this one and it kinda comes out of nowhere

Strange Flesh and All That

“I always imagined that kind of talk would get you sort all manner of flustered.”

Aziraphale smirks. “Doesn’t sound like there’s much to get flustered over.”

TwoFish

It wasn't so much a kiss. It was lips finding their proper places.

also has a homophobic slur! what is it with these early fics! very very sweet fic though

Will You Do The Fandango

“I’ll thank you kindly to get out,” Aziraphale said, and he’d changed into his smiting clothes and all.

section: it’s about the YEARNING

and, so on

“Are you content?” Aziraphale asks.

“No,” Crowley says immediately. “I never will be.”

Things That Will Never Happen

"No. I mean I want to bring you back to my flat. I have a king-sized bed. Egyptian cotton sheets. I want to pull you under the covers and hold you as tight as demonically possible. I want to fall asleep in your arms."

considered making a section just for this one titled “MORON4MORON”

section: yeah we gay keep scrolling

You Bloody Snake

Hastur dug his fingers deep in Ligur’s ashes and thought, I promise.

Best Not To Mention It

As Ligur recalled, Crowley went in for time-wasting annoyances on a large scale. Or at least that's how Hastur had explained it.

section: i just think they (lesbians) are neat!

help me to say

In 456BC Crowley patted Aziraphale on the hand after a long airborne fight over Crete and Aziraphale still lay awake some nights wondering what it all meant.

parable of shepherds

‘But the apple just keeps being there,’ Aziraphale mutters contemplatively. ‘Doesn’t it.’

radiation?!

“A what?” Anathema asked suspiciously.

“A killer queen,” the demon said with a perfectly straight face. “Gunpowder, gelatin. Dynamite with a laser beam.”

your apple-eating heathen

“Try doing me the service of thinking with your brain, instead of whatever claptrap people are saying about me this century.”

section: a tiny bit meta

What Would God Say

“It’s like the way it is when you stare out into the ocean,” Aziraphale said. “When you’re a little drunk, you know, and you suddenly feel very…tiny?”

we follow our own steps (while our shadows keep watching us)

Anathema may have been more than a little bit psychic but she was only human, really. She’d already settled comfortably into middle age, and soon she’d slip into old age and one day she would die, and Crowley would have to remember what she’d done about advice before befriending her. Most of the time, that was okay.

i put this here but it also has lesbians!!!! neat!!!!!

#fic rec #good omens #please at least hit like on this i hate how much work i did on it dfkjsfkjdskjf

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starr-fall-knight-rise · 6 years

Text

Humans are Space Orcs, “Dance”

Hope you guys enjoy, sorry for not getting something out in the last few days :)

They needed to get out of the house, as it seemed, though Sunny would be allowed to stay for the wedding, Martha Vir the captain’s mother was having trouble being in the same room as Sunny. That was ok she supposed, parents were supposed to be protective of their offspring, and if Sunny wasn’t something to be feared, than she didn’t know what was.

So Sunny had grabbed her headphones, Vir had gone rooting around in the garage coming back with a thin board with wheels strapped to the bottom, and they had set off in the early morning sunlight. Vir seemed intent on trying to balance on the rolling board as it moved down the sidewalk.

Sunny didn’t think he was very good, but what did she know about humans and their odd games.

Krill floated behind her soaking up earth’s nice, warm sun. As a creature that didn’t eat, sunlight was important for Krill. She still found it kind of weird. Despite Krill’s need to be afraid of everything, he even admitted that early summer on earth was very pleasant. And he wasn’t wrong their planet was beautiful, it didn’t have the eclectic color selection of her planet, with its rainbow mosses and purple trees, but there was something charming about the green scenery spread across a high blue sky dotted here and there with vibrant colors. She closed her eyes and let the sun warm her skin.

Off to the side a sharp note echoed down the street, and she looked up just in time to see a group of the human kits riding past on their weird metal contraptions with wheels.

All of them stared, mouths wide open.

That is, until one of them plowed right into a parked car with a loud thud, and the squealing of a car alarm.

Sunny winced. Vir grimaced. Krill covered his eyes. “That wasn’t us, was it?” The captain wondered sheepishly.

“I think it might have been, Captain.” Krill muttered as they hurried on by. Behind them the kit had started to wale, and its friends were trying to help it back to its feet, “Should we stay to help.” Krill wondered.

Vir shook his head, “Best not, other humans don’t like it when you mess with their kids. Depending on what type of people they are, we might be blamed for hurting him. They sped up the pace and kept going causing more and more staring as they made it into the center of town.

“Where are we going anyway?” Sunny wondered

“My sister has Kimber at the rec-center for her Dance and then her Karate class later on, but forgot her phone. We’re bringing it to her.” They cut off the road and into another parking lot, slipping past groups of people frozen in their tracks, and into the back doorway of the building. Ahead of them was a long hallway lined in tile. Through a pair of windows lining the side, Sunny could see large, manmade bodies of water, where the humans were….. Swimming? She didn’t know humans could do that. They made their way up the hallway, and Sunny peered into the rooms looking at odd climbing structures, and wide open areas covered in odd lines, where humans were busy playing games.

They paused at the junction of a couple hallways, “My sister says she’s in the lounge area, there are a lot of people there, do you mind waiting here, Sunny?” Vir wondered

Sunny shook her head as the other two floated off. She had a knack for attracting attention, and trouble, and though the captain was known for similar problems, there were some humans who were still harboring anger about the war.

She waited in the hall, and waited, and waited. Where were they?

Just then, the distant sound of music reached her ears. It was coming from the hallway to her left….. She was sure they wouldn’t mind if she just took a peek. Quietly she turned off her music and tip toed up the hallway, not like it would matter for all seven and a half feet of her.

With one eye Sunny peered through one of the doors little windows.

And was immediately stunned. The lights in the room were low, and the humans were standing in two double lines quite still. The soft thudding of a musical track began just behind them, and then they began to….. Began to what? How could Sunny even describe the things the humans were doing at that moment.

It was like watching a gust of wind through grass. All at once, and without a cue, the humans rocked to the side hands flung into the air and then paused frozen in place, after another moment, they rocked again to the other side freezing in place. Perfect canonization like they had been programed to do it. Sunny was frozen as she watched. The music began to speed up.

The humans in the front row stood in place though their arms moved with a surprising speed and accuracy out then in than up, than in some odd configuration back to an attention position. Behind them, the other humans were following a different pattern using their feet stepping to the side and then spinning around. Not one of them was out of step.

As they sped up, they rolled through each other cutting in patterns that shouldn’t have been possible without running into each other. With the music, and the rhythmic patterns of their movements they created a kaleidoscope of human movement rolling one after the other in mesmerizing patterns. When they stopped, Sunny was almost disappointed, hoping that they would start again, when they didn’t she ran over to another door, just in time for something else.

Again, the humans here stood in two long, straight lines. Their hands were behind their backs. All at once, they began to stomp a single foot against the floor creating a simple rhythm with their feet. Clack, clack, clack. Hands still behind their backs, they began to move their other foot. Tapping with the front and the sides of their feet against the floor with a rattling beat. The beat stayed the same, but the feet grew faster, and, as if they were making music with their bodies and their feet, they began to move their legs rattling and pounding against the floor in time with each other feet moving faster than Sunny would have thought possible.

The pounding rhythm grew up in her head mesmerizing her as she watched. The precision, and the synchronization was….. Beyond anything she had ever seen.

From there, she ran down the hallway peering into windows and watching the humans as they tapped into something…. Otherworldly.

A pair of two humans swung around each other like a pair of leaves blown in a high wind. They spun to the left, and followed by spinning back to the right. Without a single mistake or misstep they wove their feet through each other threatening every moment to trip each other, but instead rolling to the side in a massive arc using tiny steps to appear as if they were floating across the floor. They let go of each other immediately synchronizing their movements as they moved feet apart, and then they came back together like the snapping of two magnets right against each other.

Sunny ran to the next door in frantic excitement peering inside as a dozen women began to dance rolling across the floor with tiny steps, on the points of their feet. They held their arms out to the side as if they were gliding faces serene and smiling. All at once they threw their feet up in the air and began to spin, a set of whirling dervishes in gauzy white clothing. They stopped their spinning to leap to the side legs straight out in either directions toes pointed before coming down to begin spinning again. The way they danced made it appear as if they had no bones, simply pieces of ribbon being flung around the room.

The next door was opened, and Sunny peered inside. This time the humans she saw were all shapes and sizes. There were men and women and kits milling about in their places as a large man stood in front of them. Unlike Vir, and most of the other humans, he was hairless, with very dark skin, and a set of intricate inking up one of his arms.

“Now, remember, for this to work you have to be aggressive. That’s the point, I don’t want to hear any of this uhhh, remember, give me an AHHHHGG!”

At the very front of the line, Sunny saw Vir’s sister’s kit in her yellow T-shirt and green patterned pants. She wasn’t wearing any shoes. Her pigtails were messy and, one of them was close to coming out.

“Now remember to start low, hands out front like sumo wrestlers, take your positions and we will try this again….. ready?” The humans had run quickly into their lines low in a half squat position hands out in front of them. The tiny Kit’s face was split with a serious frown of concentration.

“And, on three, one, two, three.”

There it was again, Sunny was dragged in with the sudden excited violence as the humans stomped their feet into the ground shouting after every step. All together the sound of their feet and their voices amplified rising up to the sky ceiling above.

A few moments of this, and they slammed their hands against their knees in a clapping sound over and over with the stomping of their feet. The room started with a rattle, and as it went on the humans grew louder, their movements more violent the rattling turned into a pounding and then a thundering. Sunny’s eyes were wide with admiration and she took a step forward.

The humans broke suddenly as one of the kits screamed, the rest of the humans gasped. The large, dark human whirled to face her.

“SUNNY”

The room hung still in a single moment as Kimber raced over and hugged Sunny’s leg. The humans stared on in total and complete confusion. Sunny waved sheepishly at the humans who waved in shell-shock back. Kimber grabbed Sunny by the hand and walked her further into the room.

“Mr Teacher, look look this is my friend Sunny.”

The man just stood there staring, “Uh…. You’re friend.”

She nodded, “Yeah, my friend, can she stay PLEASE!”

The man rubbed the back of his head in awkward confusion, “I well, I…..don’t see why not…. I guess long as she follows the rules.”

“She will.” Kimber chirped.

She dragged Sunny to her spot showing Sunny what they were going to do, and sunny followed her instruction. They had a bit of trouble figuring out what to do with her second set of arms, and then they began. Sunny did her best, but it turned out to be more difficult than she might have thought. She kept losing her timing or getting confused. She didn’t notice when the captain and Krill showed up looking for her. She didn’t notice Vir’s expression of amusement or Krill’s expression of terror.

***

Sunny saw something that Krill would never see about human. The way they moved in synchronization with each other as if they held some sort of unknown hive mind. It was the sort of synchronization and power that soldiers strived for in war, but could never quite grasp, but here were the humans teaching their young to work in time with each other, every step the same, every movement attached to the movement of another.

Sunny didn’t know how they did it, because when they did it was like they tapped into something else, something that only humans could understand. Even their bodies behaved differently than they should, like bones turned to rubber and muscles pulled tight. They could fly through the air and glide like spirits, they could slither across the ground taking on the form and shape of different beasts as they “Danced” With each other

Krill theorized some sort of unknown human hive mind that even the humans rejected, but Sunny had a different idea. Krill would never understand as his species was less social, but she knew, while it was something more than simple observation, it was something other than a hive mind, something special about humans.

Humans can tap into something otherworldly, and they won’t even admit it.

#humans are weird #humans are space oddities #humans are space orcs #humans are space australians #earth is space australia

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astronomyparkers · 6 years

Text

Silence {V}

Warnings: Language, mentions of abuse

Pairing: Vigilante!Tom Holland x reader

Word count: 5.2k

A/N: can I just say that I seriously love all of your theories about this story? each one is so wild and i love reading them so keep sending them in! also, I’m still working on the silence playlist, so send in song recs as well! i hope yall are enjoying this story as much as I’m enjoying writing it <3 also please note I DO NOT HAVE A TAGS LIST!!!!! THE REASON WHY IS IN MY FAQ!!!! ANY/ALL MESSAGES REGARDING THIS WILL BE DELETED!!!!

{masterlist}

For a Saturday morning, the coffee shop was bustling with business as patrons moved their way through the line, eager for their daily dose of caffeine. You fiddled with your phone in your hands as you waited to order. It was a habit of yours, fiddling with anything you could get your hands on when you were anxious. And you knew you had a reason to be so nervous.

After picking up coffee, you were going to drive to Tom’s manor, which was the cause of your fidgeting hands. You hadn’t seen Tom since he had stopped by your office a few days ago. During that visit, he had promised to come to your house that night to discuss his family’s dirty history, but he never showed up.

You couldn’t deny that you were hurt. You were beginning to think that Tom trusted you, and valued having you on his side. And yet, it seemed that that wasn’t the case at all.

You shook your head as you approached the front of the line. You didn’t want to dwell on the negative thoughts that had been floating through your brain for the last few days. Instead, you placed your order, grabbed your drinks once they were finished, and headed to your car to begin the drive.

When you arrived at the manor, you held the drink carrier tightly in your hand before opening the front door. For someone so obsessed with stopping crime, you would have thought Tom would have made sure his door was locked more often.

You took a deep breath as you walked up the stairs, steeling yourself for the possible awkward encounter you were about to have. You weren’t sure what you would say to Tom when you saw him. Would you ask why he never showed up? What if he didn’t have a good reason? What if he just didn’t want to see you?

That last thought made your heart sink. Could that be it? Could it be that he regretted opening up to you so much?

When you reached the door to Jacob’s computer room, you paused. Whatever the answer may be, you were about to find out.

Before you could change your mind again, you pushed the door open. Jacob was sitting in his usual chair, tapping away at his keyboard as he stared at the screen in front of him. Harrison was sitting on the corner of the desk, a highlighter in his mouth and glasses perched on the tip of his nose as he read over notes you had given him on a donor family.

You cleared your throat and the two of them looked up at you, smiling as they did so.

“Hey, Y/N!” Jacob grinned widely as Harrison got up from his perch on the desk. “It’s so good to see you again!”

“It’s only been a few days, Jacob.” You smiled lightly as you walked further into the room, meeting Harrison halfway to pass him his drink.

“Yeah, but you’re fun to be around.” Jacob shrugged as you handed him his drink. “Harrison’s always busy with training, and Tom is so serious—”

“I’m hurt, Jacob.” Harrison pouted before sipping his drink. “And thanks, Y/N. You didn’t need to bring us anything.”

You shrugged as you set the carrier down on the desk before pulling out your drink. “It’s fine. Where’s Tom? I have one for him…”

“I’m right here.”

You turned around to see Tom standing in the doorway, dressed in his vigilante outfit. His leather boots were splattered with mud, and there were a few new rips in his black jeans. He pulled off his leather jacket and tossed it on the desk before tugging down his hood, running a hand through his hair and ruffling it up more. And, as always, he had his mask on.

“Hey.” You looked down quickly. “Did you just get in?”

Tom nodded. His eyes were dark, with purple splotches underneath them. “I was out all night, trailing this guy who—” He stopped talking abruptly, glancing at you. “Hey, is there caffeine in that?”

You nodded as you passed him his cup. “Yeah, uh, I have one for you. Who were you trailing?”

Tom shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t worry about it.”

Tom tugged off his gloves, tossing them on the desk beside him. It was rare you saw him without them, except when he came to visit you at work. You stared at his hands, calloused and rough. And missing his usual T ring, although you suspected it was something he didn’t want to wear while running around the streets of New York.

Harrison glanced between the two of you, sizing up your tense exchange before asking Tom a question. Then they began discussing some topic you couldn’t pay attention to. Instead, you looked down at your hands, tuned out their conversation, and got lost in thought.

It seemed that Tom wasn’t going to even mention standing you up the other night, much less give you a reason for why he did it. You had thought that you had finally connected, but here he was. He had the mask back on, like he was trying to hide from you all over again. It frustrated you to no end.

But if Tom was going to pretend that nothing happened, then so would you. He didn’t corner the market of brushing things off. You could be just as dismissive as he was.

“Y/N?” Jacob said, interrupting your thoughts.

“Hm?” You looked up quickly. “What was that?”

“I asked if you wanted a ride back into the city? I’m going to visit my Mom today, thought you might want to carpool.”

“Oh, no thanks, Jacob.” You smiled at him. “I drove my car in today. Are we already finished?”

“We’re kind of hitting a dead end.” Harrison sighed, pushing his glasses up. “We have all these families linked together, but no clear plan of how to stop it yet. Nor do we have enough information to go to the police. Not without sounding crazy, anyways.”

“The police don’t always get things right.” Tom muttered. “If we’re all done, I’m going to shower. Maybe catch a nap.”

Tom ran a hand through his hair and followed Jacob out of the room, pausing in the doorway.

“Y/N?” He spoke, looking back at you with guarded eyes.

“Yes?”

Tom held up the coffee cup. “Thanks for the drink.”

And then he disappeared out the door.

“I’m sorry.” Harrison shook his head. “I should have called this morning and told you that you didn’t need to make the trip. What a waste of gas.”

“It’s okay.” You shrugged. “I don’t mind the drive. I don’t get to do much of it in the city.”

“You can hang around today, if you want.” Harrison said, shuffling some papers on the desk. “I wasn’t going to be getting up to much, anyways. My family is out of town this weekend, so I can’t go visit them.”

“I don’t want to bother you—”

“It’s no bother, really!” Harrison insisted. “I was just going to train—”

“Really?” You perked up a bit. “Could I watch?”

Harrison raised an eyebrow. “Oh. Um…I don’t—”

“Not—not like that.” You felt heat rise to your cheeks. “I mean…I’ve always wanted to fight better. And seeing as how someone tried to kill me a few weeks ago…”

“Well, there’s no time like the present to learn, I always say.” Harrison smiled. “I’ll just go change into some workout clothes and then I’ll meet you in the gym.”

You nodded, and thanked your past self for wearing leggings and a tank top that day.

You made your way to the gym, with Harrison arriving in a tank top and athletic shorts a few minutes later. He smiled as he walked in, wandering over to the wall of cabinets and drawers.

“I, uh, haven’t really trained anyone new to fighting in a while…” Harrison opened a drawer and began sorting through it. “But I figured the basics would be good for you to know. Even if no one tried to kill you again—”

You walked up behind him. “Try not to sound too disappointed.”

He cracked a smile. “Even then, it’s always smart for a girl in New York to know how to defend herself.”

Harrison pulled out a long white bandage and took your hand in his, wrapping the bandage around your hand.

“Have you ever fought anyone before?” Harrison asked curiously, securing the bandage around your right hand.

“Um…not really? The art world isn’t much for physical fighting.” You shrugged. “When did you learn?”

“I…My dad taught me, actually.” Harrison mimicked your shrug as he moved to your other hand. “He was a boxer. We…well, I always preferred books and computers to boxing gloves. Which he didn’t really like.”

“Then how did you get so good? Or, good enough to train the Silence, at least.” You asked.

“I was always good. I had my dad’s affinity for it. And that’s what made him mad.” Harrison spread your fingers gently as he wrapped the bandage between them. “I was really good at it, and it kept me from getting bullied, but I never wanted to actually do anything with it.”

“It made him mad?”

“Oh yeah.” Harrison chuckled to himself. “He used to take me to training when I was a kid, maybe around eight. I was barely tall enough to see into the ring, but he would lift me up and put me in it and have me follow along with him. He always dreamed I was going to follow in his footsteps.”

“What happened when you didn’t?” You asked, almost afraid for the answer.

“He beat the shit out of me.” Harrison shook his head. “I remember…I was fourteen, maybe early fifteen, and I told him that I wanted to quit boxing. And he asked why, and I said that I wanted to focus on school, get into a good university. Make something of myself, you know?”

You nodded as Harrison finished wrapping your hand. “I know.”

“Right, well, he didn’t know.” Harrison began wrapping his own hands, his movements quick and skilled. “He pushed me in the ring, said that in this world, I had to fight for what I wanted. And if I wanted to go to university, then I had to beat him.”

“And…and you—”

“Oh, he destroyed me.” Harrison finished one hand, tying it quickly before moving to the next one. “I mean, I was some gangly fifteen year old kid, and he was a thirty-seven year old boxer who’d been training for years. And he wasn’t quite sober, although he never really was anymore.”

“Jesus, Harrison.” You said quietly. “I don’t—I’m not really sure what to say…”

“You don’t need to say anything.” Harrison shook his head. “It’s fine. He left us a few months after that, but honestly…we were better off. And a few months after that, I met Tom. Everything worked out in the end.”

“Still…you didn’t deserve—”

“No, I didn’t.” Harrison looked down as he finished wrapping his hand. “But who does? Everyone has tough shit to go through. Jesus, look at Tom. With what happened to him, I’m surprised he’s not a blackout drunk. Or that he hasn’t put a bullet in his head.”

You flinched, and Harrison noticed.

“I—sorry.” He said quickly, flashing you a sympathetic smile. “I shouldn’t have—we’ll just get started, then.”

Harrison began showing you the proper way to stand, how to hold your body, and where to keep your hands. Then he showed you a few self defense moves, and how to get out of an attacker’s grip from different positions. He was a very patient teacher, guiding your every move and showing you again and again until you had it down.

“Good, you’re doing well, Y/N!” Harrison smiled, watching as you punched his hands. “Keep it up, five more!”

You hit his hands five more times before slumping over, pressing your hands to your knees and catching your breath. “Jesus—Christ.”

“Good job, curator.” Harrison said, tossing you a water bottle from the small fridge in the corner. “You’re pretty tough.”

“Thank—you.” You gasped, chugging half the water bottle in one go. “You’re a—good—teacher.”

Harrison laughed and put a hand on your back, opening his mouth to say something. But before he could speak, someone else did.

“Yeah, he is.”

You looked up and saw Tom standing in the gym doorway. He was freshly showered, with wet hair falling in damp curls around his forehead. He was dressed as casually as you’d ever seen him, in a pair of jeans and an old Metallica t-shirt. And, of course, the mask on his face. The mask that made it so damn hard to read his emotions. His eyes were as unreadable as always, but the tone of his voice was not particularly happy.

“Hey, Tom.” Harrison nodded at him, sipping some water from his own bottle. “Feeling better?”

“Decent.” Tom shrugged. “What are you two up to?”

“I’ve been teaching Y/N how to fight a bit.” Harrison answered. “Just in case she needs to.”

“Yeah.” Tom crossed his arms. “I’m usually there, though, right? I’m always patrolling around the museum and her apartment.”

“I said just in case, man.” Harrison smiled good naturedly. “You know, to be prepared for the worst case scenario.”

You stared at Tom as you tried to catch your breath, confused by his short answers and sudden hostility. If anyone had the right to be short and hostile, it was you.

“Right.” Harrison glanced between you and Tom, a million thoughts apparent in his eyes. “Well, I’m going to, uh…shower. And then…call my mom.”

“I thought you said your family was out of town?” You asked, frowning.

“They have phones in Chicago.” Harrison smiled quickly before exiting the room, calling a quick, “See you!” over his shoulder.

Tom and you looked at each other before quickly looking away. You fiddled with your taped hands nervously, unsure of what to say.

“So.” Tom cleared his throat as he walked to the storage cabinets. “Harrison was teaching you how to fight?”

“Yeah.” You nodded and drank more water. “He, um…he told me about his childhood. With his dad.”

“Fuck.” Tom cursed and began wrapping his hands up. “That’s heavy.”

“I just…Harrison is so sweet. I don’t understand how someone can grow up like that and turn out so…good.”

Tom grunted quietly as he pulled the tape tight. “Yeah. He’s great, isn’t he?”

“His dad…God. It’s just so shitty.”

“Yeah. Dads are shitty.” Tom shrugged as he finished wrapping his first hand. “My dad turned out to be a money laundering criminal, so…”

“Shitty.” You echoed, watching as Tom began to wrap his other hand.

“So…” Tom cleared his throat. “Want to show me what Harrison taught you?”

“Just some defense stuff. And a few punches.”

“You know…” Tom sniffed loudly and looked down, finishing up the wrap on his hand. “I…I’m always there. Watching out for you. No one…no one would even have a chance to hurt you.”

“But what if you’re not there?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.

Tom waked over to the punching bag hanging a few feet away. “But I am there.”

You followed him over, your hands on your hips. “But what if you’re not?”

“But I am.” Tom hit the punching bag hard.

“What is the big deal?” You questioned. “I’m not a—a damsel in distress, Tom! I don’t want you to constantly be around, waiting to protect me from something! I want to be able to protect myself!”

“Oh, okay.” Tom hit the bag with a grunt. “So should I stop looking out for you, then? Just let some hitman get near you?”

You laughed incredulously, looking around the room. “Is this a joke? Why are you acting like this?”

“It just pisses me off.” Tom kept hitting the bag. “That someone can try to protect someone, and it’s not enough.”

“It’s not enough?” You echoed, raising your eyebrows in shock. “I’m sorry, did I not thank you for saving my life? Because I’m pretty sure I did!”

“Look, I’m just saying.” Tom raised his hands in the air. “If you want Harrison to train you, then I can go.”

“Oh my god.” You blinked in shock. “Is this about Harrison?”

Tom rolled his eyes. “Jesus, no—”

“It is about Harrison, isn’t it? Are you mad we were hanging out?”

“What if I am?” Tom asked, turning back to the punching bag. “What if I am mad?”

“Then that would be ridiculous.” You shook your head. “You have no right to be mad! You—Jesus, Tom, I can be friends with him, and—”

“I know!” Tom yelled, hitting the punching bag again. “I know you can be friends with him! I know that!”

“Then why are you yelling like this?” You asked. “You—you never take off that fucking mask, you don’t give me a straight answer to anything, and when I try to get you to open up, you refuse to!”

Tom grunted loudly as he hit the punching bag. “That’s not fair.”

“Well, I’m sorry if I don’t feel like being fair right now!” You yelled. “I’m sorry that I decided to hang out with someone who’s not constantly uncomfortable in my presence!”

“Hey.” Tom hit the bag one last time and then turned to glare at you. “I have a fucking right to be uncomfortable. You have no idea what I’ve gone through.”

“You’re right. I don’t. You don’t tell me anything.” You started to unravel the wrap from your hands, tossing it on the ground once it was off. “But you can’t blame me for that.”

“Y/N.”

“No, you know what?” You pulled off the last piece of wrap, throwing it at Tom’s chest. “I’m done. I’m fucking done. I’m done trying to help you, I’m done getting involved in this, and I’m done being terrified of — of getting murdered just by doing my job. I’m done.”

“Y/N.” Tom repeated.

You shook your head, and ran out of the room.

You didn’t see Tom for four days.

Harrison and Jacob were calling you constantly, emailing you every hour, and sending text after text. You guessed that Tom hadn’t told them anything about the fight you two had had, because they kept asking what had happened, and why you wouldn’t contact them.

You felt horrible ignoring their calls, but you knew you couldn’t handle seeing either of them at the moment. Every message you listened to was like a shot to the heart, and you weren’t quite sure why.

Maybe because they were the only ones leaving messages. Tom had called you, yes, but he never left a message. He never sent you a text, or an email. Just calls that you watched go to voicemail, but no voicemail was ever left.

The day before, though, you had received a bouquet of lilies. They were sitting on your office desk when you arrived, and you called Felicity in with a frown.

“Felicity,” You had asked, slipping off your jacket and hanging it on your coat rack. “Where did these come from?”

“They were delivered this morning.” She answered. “I don’t know who sent them, but I’m pretty sure there’s a card in them.”

You had walked over to examine them, and sure enough, a card was tucked amongst the blooms. You had pulled it out, feeling your insides freeze a bit when you read it.

“I miss you. –t.h”

The card was still tucked in your coat pocket, where you had stuffed it quickly after reading it. You took it out now, reading it again as you had over the last day. Tossing your coat on the back of your couch, you slipped off your work heels and fiddled with the corner of the card.

He missed you? Then why didn’t he leave any messages? Why didn’t he try to contact you more? Why didn’t he just come see you?

You got up from the couch and poured yourself a generous glass of wine, and then leaned against the counter and sighed. All you wanted was a straight answer. All you wanted was for things not to be complicated.

You finished your glass of wine quickly, and wasted no time before pouring another. Once you finished that glass, you went to pour another, but a knock on the door interrupted you.

You walked over to the front door, staring through the peephole. A blonde woman in a pantsuit and heels was outside, a smile plastered on her face.

You opened the door. “Hi?”

“Hello, Ma’am.” She said with a smile. “I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions about the building. I’m looking to rent an apartment on the floor below, but the last apartment complex I rented from had so many problems. Would I be able to get your opinion on some things?”

“Oh…I don’t know—”

“I promise, it’ll only be a few minutes.” She said brightly.

“Um, okay.” You nodded, opening the door more and allowing her to come inside. “Sure…?”

“Mona.” She said. “And you are?”

“Y/N. Nice to meet you.” You replied, watching as she looked around the living room with wide eyes.

“How long have you lived here, Y/N?” She asked curiously.

“God, um, around two years, I guess?” You shrugged, turning around to head to the kitchen. “Would you like anything to drink? Coffee? Tea? I have some wine if—”

Before you could finish your sentence, an arm wrapped around you from behind, encircling your neck and beginning to choke you. You gasped for air, struggling to throw the woman off of you.

You tried your best to remember Harrison’s training. You backed up, slamming Mona against the wall. Her head hit the mirror that adorned the wall, and you could hear the sound of the glass breaking. Her grip slackened a bit, and you looked down and stomped on her foot as hard as you could.

But she was in heels, and you were barefooted; you did more damage to yourself than her. Mona’s grip began to tighten again, and she pushed back from the wall. You used your foot again, but this time, you went for her knee, kicking with all your strength. You heard something crack, and she cried out, releasing you from her grip.

You gasped for air, running towards your bedroom. You still had the gun from the first hitman (you found it remarkable that you had to clarify that there were multiple hitmen after you) had tried to kill you with, tucked under your pillow; you thought that if you could reach it…you weren’t sure. You weren’t a killer. But desperate times called for desperate measures, and—

Before you could reach your bedroom, there was a muted bang from behind you.

Whipping back around, you saw Mona lying on the ground, her eyes wide open, and her blonde hair quickly staining red from the blood pouring out of the gun wound in the back of her head. Or, at least, the back of what used to be her head.

Standing behind her was the Silence, dressed in all black, mask on. Gun with a silencer still pointed at the corpse on the ground.

Tom stared at the body, walking towards it and staring for a moment before tossing his gun on your couch. Then he looked up at you.

You weren’t sure what to say, or do. You just stared back at him, a million words bubbling to your lips all at once, but all of them unable to pour out.

“Y/N.” Tom said quietly, his voice barely audible through his mask. “Are…are you alright?”

You nodded slowly, swallowing hard to clear the lump in your throat. “Yeah. I…yeah.”

Tom mimicked your nod. “Good. I-I’m glad.”

“There’s…” You swallowed again, trying to keep your throat clear. “Tom, there’s a dead body bleeding onto my throw rug.”

“I know.” Tom looked down at the body before walking over to you, making sure to give the body of your would-be killer a wide berth. “I know. It’s okay.”

“I don’t—what do we—” You stared at her—its—eyes. “I…I have to call my landlord…”

“No you don’t.” Tom shook his head and rested his hands on your shoulders. “Y/N, look at me. Eyes on me.”

You did as Tom said, tearing your gaze away from the body.

“Did anyone see you come home?” Tom asked.

You shook your head. “No, I…I don’t think so.”

“Good. Go downstairs, get in your car, and head to the manor. I’ll call the police. It’ll just look like this lady was trying to rob you, I stopped her, and that’s that.”

“But—”

”Go.” Tom pushed you towards the door. “Your neighbours might have heard something. We don’t have much time.”

You did as he said, grabbing your bag off the counter and hurrying to your car.

The entire drive to the manor, your mind was a blur. You kept seeing the body over and over, everywhere you looked. When you reached the manor, you parked your car, but couldn’t make yourself get out. You just sat in the driver’s seat, staring out the windshield.

A knock on the window made you jump, and you looked to your left to see Tom knocking on your window.

“Open the door, Y/N.” He said quietly.

You did as he said and he motioned for you to move to the passenger seat, which you did also. Tom sat down in the driver’s seat, staring at you as you stared straight ahead.

“I don’t…” Tom sighed, pulling his hood own and running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Someone just tried to kill me. Again. And you killed them. Again.” You said in a flat voice. “There is nothing you can say, Tom. There’s not.”

Tom nodded, looking down at his hands. “There is, actually. I…I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

You looked up at him, and he sighed before continuing.

“I didn’t…I was late tonight. If you hadn’t fought back, if you hadn’t done what Harrison had taught you…” He inhaled raggedly. “I should have taught you all that. I was stupid, and arrogant, and I thought I was enough for…enough for you. But I wasn’t. I’m not. I’m so sorry.”

“Tom…” You said softly. There wasn’t anything else you could say.

“I do trust you. I know I don’t act like I do, but I do. I—being around you is—you’re so wonderful. And you—you don’t even know it. I’m not—you don’t make me uncomfortable. My…feelings for you…they’re what makes me uncomfortable.” Tom touched his mask lightly. “And I-I’m going to prove it.”

“Tom—”

“Please.” He said softly, looking into your eyes. “Don’t say anything right now. Just let me…”

Tom unhooked the side of his mask, pulling it off and dropping it slowly to his lap. And then, for the first time, the Silence turned to look at you without his mask.

He looked so different, but still the same. The natural light coming through your cars windows revealed so much more than the artificial fluorescent light at the museum. There was a small scar at the top right corner of his lip that you hadn’t noticed before. Then again, you hadn’t ever stared at him so closely before. His lips were slightly more chapped than usual, but more pink than you had ever seen them. And he looked…so hardened. But so young.

“This is…this is me.” He looked down at the mask, almost like he was speaking to it. “My name is Thomas Stanley Holland. I had a twin, named William. I have three other brothers. I…I run around, trying to fix my own past by fixing the present.” He swallowed hard. “I’ve killed people. Not good people. Not because I wanted to, really. But sometimes…I did. Want to. And I…I’m selfish. Because even though—even though you just saw something so incredibly horrific and you’re clearly in shock, all I want to do right now is kiss you.”

Your breath caught in your throat, and Tom turned his head up to look at you. His eyes were so brown, and so warm, and so afraid.

Wordlessly, you took the mask from his grip, tossing it onto the floor of the car. Then you cupped his cheek.

“I think…sometimes, you deserve to be selfish a bit.” You said quietly. You could feel the heat of his skin under your hand, could almost picture his heart pumping the blood to his cheek. “Take off your gloves, Tom.”

He did what you asked, pulling off the leather fingerless gloves and letting them fall into his lap. He then looked at you with wide eyes. It was the most unsure you had ever seen him in your life.

Wordlessly, you took his hand and brought it to your cheek, pressing it against your skin. His breath hitched, and you leaned into his touch.

Tom’s eyes fluttered close for a moment, his breathing short and shuddering. You wondered if he had ever allowed himself to be this intimate with anyone. To touch a person’s cheek just to feel their warmth, and not expect anything in return.

You watched Tom’s throat move as he swallowed, heard the sound of it in the enclosed space of the car.

“There’s…there’s this painting at the MoMA.” Tom’s breathing was shallow. “By Magritte. The Lovers II. And it—it’s two people—”

“—wearing covers over their faces and kissing. I know.” You finished for him. It was the painting that you had been talking to his brother about at the investor’s ball, just before you had met him—not the Silence, but Tom—for the first time. “I love it.”

“It…it’s my favourite.” Tom admitted. “It always has been, since I was young. But now I—I go and I stare at it. And I wonder why Magritte chose to paint it. What he wanted to convey with it. If he knew—”

You interrupted Tom’s words with a kiss, your lips pressing against his in haste. Tom quickly responded, the hand that wasn’t cupping your cheek moving to the back of your neck and tangling in your hair. When Tom pulled back after a moment, you tried to think of words to say, to explain your interruption.

“Um…” You cleared your throat. “If he knew…what?”

Tom gave a small smile. “If he knew that, one day, the son of a disgraced businessman would be standing in front of it, before putting on a mask of his own.”

The corner of your mouth tilted up. “I’m no expert, but—well, actually, I am an expert. And I don’t think Magritte had any idea that would happen.”

Tom chuckled, but the sound was tinged with darkness. “Yeah. Figures. I didn’t know it would happen, either.”

And then he kissed you again. And you forgot about the darkness all at once.

{part VI}

723 notes · View notes

hollyhomburg · 6 years

Text

Don’t Care If It Hurts: Pt. 8

(DOG HYBRID! + GAURD DOG!JIMIN X READER) (FT.OLDERBROTHER! + MAFIA BOSS!NAMJOON)

PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART 5 PART 6 PART 7 PART 8 PART 9

Summary: After a rival gang makes an attempt on your life, Your older brother, the infamous leader of Seoul’s largest gang; Kim Namjoon gets you a guard hybrid; Park Jimin, The reigning champion of Seoul’s underground hybrid fighting ring.

Pairing: Jimin x Reader, mentions of Hoseok x Reader. Namjoon x Seokjin

Tags: blood, gore, SMUT, cumplay, praise kink, oral, overstimulation, shower sex, multiple rounds. kidnapping, guns,

Word count: 9.8k

Authors note: ITSSSSS FINALLY HEREEEEEE, I know you guys have been waiting for this one a long time so I won't let it go any longer. thank you so much for all your positive feedback! this chapter was a difficult one to write- mostly because I don't write smut often. But anyways enjoy!!!!! please give this love- i worked realy hard on it for you <3

Song rec: take you down - chris brown, get you by daniel Ceaser, fetish - Selena Gomez

You were under house arrest. You tried to be understanding most of the time. Namjoon himself had relayed the threat that the head of the Red X’s had conveyed; that if they got their hands on you- they would likely not return you alive.

How could you blame him for being protective of you when it came from a place of love? You should feel glad to have even one day of freedom at all. But somehow knowing you can’t leave the compound makes you even antsier than usual. You hate sitting there on your couch, or even working out in the work out room (one of Jimin’s suggestions on the 5th day when you almost decided to take a jailbreak).

You hate not being able to help, especially when you know that outside- even in the main building you know that the entire gang is preparing for war. You had gone out there only once, looking for Namjoon after you’d woken up and found no note on your door, or evidence that he’d come home last night.

Thought you’re as familiar with the building as you are with your own house. You didn’t manage to find him before Yoongi found you. he scolded you, and asked why you didn’t bring Jimin with you, and most importantly why you were venturing in here. it’s not like its forbidding, but you know that it’s a little strange to have you here next to piles of guns and contraband. Even now that you’re an adult the older boys still try to conceal the worst parts of the gangs activates from you.

Yoongi had sent you back to the house- saying that he’ll send over Jungkook later to play some video games with you and Jimin (who had still been blissfully asleep when you left that morning).

Jimin had been tugging on his jacket- forgetting his shoes when you walked into the front door. Politely escorted by a group of no less than 5 gang members. His annoyance clearly written on his face.

“Would it kill you to at least leave a note- you could have woken me and I would have gone with you…” he had chastised you later while the two of you had been making breakfast. Someone had brought of groceries so that you were less tempted to go out for food. Your hand had lingered on his shoulder, as he fried bacon in a pan. And you had let yourself lean into him for a moment, resting your head on his shoulder.

“I just wanted to see him Jimin- I didn’t think it would be a big deal.” His shoulder relaxed under your touch. One of his hands brushed against the top of your head, feather light and barely there. Recently affections were more commonplace. It’s been too easy to let yourself depend on Jimin the past few days. Easier even to seek out affection from him in the absence of company your brother.

There is some small part of you that will always wonder which part of your relationship- your friendship is due to the master/hybrid dynamic that was at its foundation. But it doesn’t seem that way most of the time, especially since Namjoon’s been treating him as more of a member of the inner circle since he saved you at the gala. You always relax when he initiates affection. Which is as often as you do.

You’ve never felt like this with anyone before, it’s not that you love the affection that Jimin gives you- though you do. It feels so nice to be touched and held and protected the way that he cares for you. But its almost like something clicks into place when he’s next to you. Like when he’s next to you it doesn’t matter that the war outside is taking victims- as long as the two of you and your family make it out alive everything will be alright.

There have already been casualties.

Three since the gala, two of them low-level gangsters that you only knew in passing, and another one that you’d known by name from your father's reign. The first two had been the victim of a drive-by shooting. The third murdered on his way to a safe house.

Namjoon had been irate. Jin had to be called in to stop him from rolling right up to Chanyeol’s uncle's house and taking care of him. But it was unlikely that Chanyeol or any of his inner circles would be there. In fact, since being released on bail- no one, not the police or even Taehyung’s informants had heard hide nor hair of him. Their first offensive move had sent them reeling for the first few days.

The two murders had sent a message back- that Bangtan couldn’t hide from the red X’s. It seemed increasingly more likely that this would lead to a head to head battle between the two. And that would mean dead bodies, and a lot of them soon.

No one could blame you for feeling antsy- wanting to get out of the house and see your family when you knew how in danger they were. You hated not being able to do anything. Not being able to help at all. After the morning that you strayed, Namjoon had called you, assuring you that he’d sleep soon. Reminding you that every moment they had to plan now was essential for the bloodbath that was to come.

You’d begged him to let you help plan something but Namjoon was relentless; stating again and again that he needed you safe to have a clear head. He hadn’t listened even when He’d come back the next morning to have coffee with you. he’d left soon after much to your dismay.

Jimin had tried to distract you as best he could from the anxiety gnawing at you. Suggesting that you spend time in the work out room with him to work off some of your pent-up energy. You’d already tore through drama after drama on your couch. Sometimes talking sometimes not. Sometimes just happy to have his warmth by your side or his heavy head on your lap.

Then the word comes in from Namjoon, you could spend one day outside of the compound- provided it was somewhere well populated and you were home far before nightfall. Then it was just a question of what you would do with that time. You spent a few hours with Jimin trying to find something that would state your desire to leave- since it seemed like it would be the last time you would be let out for a while.

You feel a little like Cinderella, only instead of having your carriage turning back into a pumpkin at midnight, It feels like the consequences are more along the lines of Alice and the red queen chopping off your head.

Eventually, a traveling show of French artwork at the national museum draws your eye. And after Jin acquires a set of floor plans and you run it by Namjoon. He agrees begrudgingly to let you go on a Saturday morning when it will be at it’s most crowded. Having Jin drop you off and pick you up after a few hours. Apparently, it coordinated well with some other business he had in that part of the city anyway.

The day arrives; you try to muster yourself up to be as excited as usual. This felt too much like the last hurrah and even Seokjin can tell that your spirits are less than high. Seokjin’s eyes the follow you for every moment in the back of the car, tracking your falling smile every time you turn away from the light conversation. You scamper out of the car as soon as Jin’s car begins to slow down breathing in the fresh air.

Jimin calls after you as you continue to trot up the steps, your light blue dress swishing around your hips. “what’s gotten into you today” he asks as he finally snags your wrist in his. He’s wearing a white button-down today and a pair of sensible light blue slacks. You suppose you probably look like any other couple if it wasn’t for his ears poking out of the side of his head. You slow down as you get near the ticket booth.

“I just…” you trail off, your eyes hopping too and fro in the river of school children and the elderly that seem just as excited to look at art as you are. It seems impossible that out of everyone here any of them could be connected to the red X’s. But you still feel that jump in your pulse whenever someone’s eyes fall on yours.

The paranoia could kill this day, and you don’t want to let it, you’re going to try to let it go for Jimin's sake and yours. “I’m just excited to see some of the artwork.” You say, forcing a smile in Jimin's direction.

His thumb stutters along your palm. You look particularly like a masterpiece today, with the way that the simple dress hugs your hip and your hair which brushes against your collar bones, Jimin finds himself reaching out to brush it behind your ear, and as always when your eyes flicker up to his it makes his heart light up, especially when you smile- your first real smile of the day.

The galleries are calm and quiet, the only sound the noisy clack of a woman’s heals. The light is low with the tangle of hallways and walls meant to maximize hanging space and confusing corners. As your paces slow to a gentle meander from painting to painting Jimin finds himself drawn to your wide-eyed, gentle lipped expression as often as he is to the paintings. He links his arm with yours as you move onto the exhibit that you really wanted to see; the French artwork.

“When I was little.” You say in a hushed voice as if you’ll disturb the picture of the sleeping woman in front of you. “Namjoon would take me to galleries all the time; he used to tell me that he’d let me fill his house with paintings when he was older because I had much better taste than him.”

“And did you? Or have you yet?”

“No” you giggle after a moment, “mostly because we haven’t gone together to look at art in a while, and we already have enough in our house, but If I did I think I’d put something like this in our house” you say as you move on to the next painting “I love their use of colors.”

In truth, Jimin loves the painting too- though its colors are melancholy blues and purples, with only little splotches of color for the sun, “I don’t know a lot about art.” Jimin says, his hands in his pockets “but doesn’t it make you feel sad?”

“Of course.” You say with eyes far away. And Jimin knows that you’re thinking about something even more far away then the painting of the French countryside. “The same way it makes me feel sad about things that might not happen.” Jimin gives you a small smile.

“Don’t let Hoseok hear you say that.” Jimin grins. The other night Hoseok and Jungkook had come over for dinner with Taehyung and the 5 of them, minus Namjoon. Had played cards over a bottle of whiskey. Taehyung and Hoseok had gotten into a philosophical discussion about worry and hope that had made Jimin’s head spin. It had only ended with Jungkook had lurched forward falling asleep for a moment and almost landing face first into his drink. The ensuing roast of the maknae was enough to get them off the topic. You smile back at him.

“He would hate it if he knew I had lost hope.”

“So that’s what’s gotten into you today,” Jimin says, “you’ve lost hope that your brother can win.” You look away, feeling the heaviness that settles on you again.

“I’ve just lost hope that this will end in the way I want it too.” You say quietly, “come on lets sit” you say to Jimin, prompting him to sit by a window so that you can look at a sculpture and at the city skyline, you’re viewing a lot of buildings from the back, and you can make out graffiti eyes, silhouettes, and tags that overlay each other in a natural collage. The city’s own kind of art gallery.

“I know what you’re thinking.” Jimin says suddenly, “but you don’t have to feel hopeless, sometimes it’s just as bad to think that the worst is going to happen than to think that everything is going to be alright,”

“You sound like Hoseok.” You smile up at Jimin. And he swallows back. the two of you are so wrapped up in each other that neither of you notices the careful footsteps creeping up behind you slowly.

“I don’t know- I’d hope for the worst especially if it meant that my brother was stupid enough to put me on the chopping block- might be a quicker death,” a foreign voice says behind you, you and Jimin turn. The black-haired man with the foxlike smile is vaguely familiar- but you're sure you couldn't have seen him more than once.

Jimin stands in a heartbeat, “And who the fuck are you?” you take one moment to take in the area, your bench is out of sight from the main gallery, no cameras- it’s too secluded to be safe.

“Someone who just got lucky I guess,” he says as he reaches inside of his suit jacket. Jimin is on him in an instant, vaulting over the bench and punching him across the face, though you can already see the hard outline of the gun through the man's suit jacket.

The man pulls it out of his suit jacket It goes off once as Jimin tries to wrestle it away from the man, but with the silencer, it barely makes a pop. Jimin knocks it out of his hand as he punches him in the face again, a splatter of blood hitting your face from the gangster’s mouth. The gun clatters across the floor and you scramble for it. Blood splatters against the white gallery walls as Jimin punches him again and you get the gun. It feels cold and too large in your hands, heavy as you point it at the man's head.

Jimin looks absolutely murderous at the man, as he dispenses hit after hit onto his face, and it sends a chill you’re your spine. “How lousy- didn’t your master warn you?” Jimin taunts, the man tries to wrestle out of Jimin’s hold, but the years of fighting have made Jimin lean and incomparable in a fight as he sends fist after fist into the mans face, punctuating each word with another blow.

“If- you- plan- to- kill- us, you- better- get- it- right- the- first- try.” The man's head hits the floor but Jimin just picks him up again, shoving him up against the wall, “Because if you don’t, I’m coming after you.”

You’re surprised that he even has a face left to smile up at Jimin, spitting blood in his face but it doesn’t even make Jimin flinch. “I’m not the one with a master you half-breed.”

“Don’t call him a half breed!” you shout, pressing the shaking gun to his temple. But the gangster just laughs in your face.

“Did Namjoon never teach you how to hold a gun sweetheart?” he mocks, but you steal yourself, aiming into the wall right next to his head and pulling the trigger trying not to flinch as you feel the gun release. The blood drains out of his face.

“You treated him didn’t you, you’re the doctor from the hospital,” Dr. Xiumen smiles, his bloody teeth and split lip making it look more grotesque.

“At least you’re smarter than your brother,”

“How long have you been following us?” you ask, pressing the hot gun against his cheek, making him flinch, at the same moment another person walks around the side. A pedestrian, an old lady who flinches back when you and Jimin turn to her ready to fight. her eyes have snagged on the gun in your hands as she stutters out an “excuse me” as her eyes fall on the bloody man before she turns around and runs.

But it’s already too late- you know you’ve already been made, Jimin gives several punches to his head for good measure before he lets Dr. Xiumen fall to the ground unconscious. He grabs your arm.

“We have to go now!” Jimin says, but panic has already broken out, you cant hide the blood on his hands as you take off towards the stairwell. Jimin pauses for a second before he pulls the fire alarm. the ringing bells almost defining as everyone empties out of the art museum.

The gun gets hastily shoved into your purse after you put the safety on. Jimin presses the panic button on his wrist tracker and pulls you along through the thrum of panicked people leaving the museum. somewhere a child cries for his mother, though they’re in no real danger. Jimin pulls you up by your hand even when you stumble- his hand vicelike around yours. Seokjin is already waiting by the exit unblocked by the time you make it outside the museum.

“What the hell happened y/n” he yells as he peals out of the parking lot, narrowly avoiding crashing into a fire truck.

“We ran into the red X’s”

“How many where there?”

“Only one- I think it was just an accident, he might have seen us and followed us in or something.”

“Are you alright.” Is Seokjin’s next question as he navigates carefully onto the highway, already the sound of emergency vehicles is ebbing into the distance. But every cop car that flashes by makes you flinch. Seokjin makes every effort to keep going the speed limit.

“I’m alright, a little shaken but alright.” You steady your hands by gripping the seat in front of you. “He’s still there you should probably send Hoseok in after us he could have information-”

“He’s already on it,” Seokjin says, letting out a pent-up breath. “All Namjoon wants me to do is get you home right now.”

“Where is my brother?”

“He’s on business-“

“The least you could do is tell me Seokjin.”

He starts to shake his head, “Namjoon doesn’t want me to worry you.”

“Cut the crap Seokjin- you know-”

“No- I don’t actually, and no I don’t owe you information, especially when you go and do things that put you blatantly in danger y/n.”

“I need to feel free Seokjin,” you say in a small voice.

“And Namjoon needs you safe but I don’t see either of you getting what you want.” Seokjin retorts as you turn into the compound, he parks the car in front of your house and before either of you can reply Seokjin’s phone rings, “it’s your brother- I’ll meet you inside- just go.”

You and Jimin quickly change out of your bloodstained museum clothes, you change into a pair of pink satin shorts and a black sweatshirt and Jimin into a pair of sweats and a tee-shirt.

You find Seokjin in the main lobby, passing him quietly still on the phone with what sounds like Hoseok. Before you both retreat to the kitchen to wait for him. It only takes a few moments for him to finish up the call.

“It seems like he escaped unscathed though they found blood at the crime scene no one seems any the wiser about your two’s involvement in today's events. The police don’t have a good description of the madwoman that shoved a gun in an old lady’s face.”

“I never shoved a gun in-” you begin to protest before Seokjin silences you with a raised hand.

“All that matters is that the two of you are safe and that no one is looking for you.” Seokjin runs a hand through his hair. “Namjoon will be back from Daegu from the gun deal early tomorrow morning, he said he’ll talk to you then.”

You sigh; “so now you’ll tell me what my brothers doing”

Seokjin sends the two of you a pointed look. “I have to go straighten out something’s at the docks, please try not to get into too much trouble tonight” you nod dumbly, your fingers drumming against the countertop. Seokjin gives Jimin a look over his shoulder that pointedly says to keep an eye on you before he leaves. Neither of you talks until the car outside rumbles to a start.

“Cheer up.” Jimin walks over to the sink, “at least you know you’ll see him tomorrow.”

“You know he’ll probably send us away after this right?” Jimin turns on the faucet and nods without looking at you. You find yourself staring at the marble countertops before you catch him flinch out of the corner of his eyes. He holds up his hands chagrined, showing you his knuckles, which are bruised and split. “I guess I got a little carried away earlier” you take his hands in two of yours.

“I have a first aid kit upstairs come on.” You say and tug him. You make him sit on the toilet while you drag out the first aid kit from under your sink. Setting out the gauze. You smile slightly as you realize how similar of a situation this one is to the condition Jimin first was in when he came into your life so many weeks ago.

“What are you thinking about.” He asks carefully, his ears flicking back and forth, he’s happy to see you smiling for what feels like the first time today. Today has been so crazy and you look like some sleep could do you well.

“Just remembering.” You say as you dab at his wounds carefully with a gauze pad. In a moment of boldness, Jimin takes your hand and presses his pillowy lips to your palm, continuation to give small kisses to the tips of your fingers.

“Thank you,” he says after a moment, leaning into your hand as blush colors you from your toes to the top of your head.

“What for?” you stutter out, happy at your hybrids affection but wary of his eyes on you. There is something electric in the air right now, something that almost seems to hum every time Jimin touches you. something that if disturbed would never settle back.

“I love it when you take care of me. I’ve never been taken care of like this.” Jimin says hushedly as he sits on your toilet, his bloody hands out in front of him. You meet his gaze, and in his eyes, you find a consuming tenderness; you smile slightly, trying to not get your hopes up like usual.

“I’m happy to be here whenever you need me.”

“I thought it would get easier- easier to say that kind of thing after the events of the gala.”

“You mean after you saved my life. I haven’t forgotten Jimin- but that’s not why I care for you.”

“Is it because I’m a hybrid? If I where a human man could you love me?” you drop the thin gauze onto the counter and let it roll onto the floor. Stooping for a second to hide your blush, before you swallow thickly.

“I already do love you silly.” You say reaching for his hands. He pulls them away from you and you look up shocked to see him so serious, his eyebrows furrowed together.

“Not like that, not the way you feel for Jungkook or your brother- or even how you felt about Hoseok at one point. I just want to know if you could love me.”

“And I just said that I already do.” You say equally as serious, setting the gauze back on the counter. When you turn around you find Jimin standing, either of his hands trap you against the counter as he looks down at you through thick lashes, his plush lips set in a line. Jimin is so close to you that you can feel his breath on your forehead, it would be so easy just to tilt your head forward and meet his lips.

“Don’t tease me,” Jimin said, his tone soft and pregnant with emotion, he’s looking at you like he couldn’t possibly believe you’re telling the truth. Like you must be lying or toying with him. “You know what I meant, do you think you could ever love m-me?” he asks, his voice breaking.

“I wasn’t teasing.” You say a small smile playing on your bitten lips, “I was just telling the truth.” And that’s when you tilted your chin forward to meet Jimin's lips. The kiss makes the two of you breathless, sending Jimin’s heart rate skyrocketing as his shocked hands come forward to grab you, holding you to him, worried that you’ll try to pull away too early.

His lips start moving against yours almost instantly, and you feel him sighing against the soft sweetness of your mouth that he had only ever dreamed of indulging in. When you finally pull away to get some breath, Jimin tilts forward for a moment. Chasing your lips like he’s already addicted to them.

“Does that answer your question?” you say, playfulness toying at your mouth. Jimin connects your lips again in answer though you can fill a smile on his mouth.

“Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” he asks, his breath already uneven. He’s slightly shocked that you kissed him. He thought if anything he would be the first one to lose control and kiss you- not that he’s complaining with you he’ll always take what he can get.

“I didn’t want you to feel pressured into anything- like you had to love me to fulfill your duties.- and if you don’t want anything to do with me we can go back to the way we were before-“

“No,” Jimin says, his hands fisting on the fabric of your sweatshirt pulling you into him. Resting his hips against yours making you shudder against his form. He suddenly feels too hot- too large for the bathroom. “I could say that I love you a thousand times and it would still never be enough, that’s how I feel about you. I’ve wanted you since I first got you. I want you now, and right now wanting you forever seems impossible if I don’t have you.” he crashes his lips against yours and this time your hands go up to twine in his hair.

If his lips were shocked and startled against yours at first now they are passionate and assured as you try to keep up with his ravenous lips. His hands fist in the back of your sweatshirt brushing up against the bare skin of your back. You pull apart again for a breath. And Jimin is insistent pressing a kiss against your cheek and then trailing them down to your neck to breath in deep.

“Do you want me in this way? I want to hear it from you.” the hybrid suddenly drops to his knees. “Don’t you want me y/n? I can smell that you do.” he’s face to face with your baby pink sleeping shorts. He inhales a deep breath making you blush, “Jimin, w-what are you doing.” The sight of him on his knees in front of you makes you stutter.

“I must not be the only one who’s wanted this, I wonder if I.” he pries where your thighs are straining to keep closed. And he growls when he sees the faint wet patch soaking through the satin. The smell of you becoming more potent. He can’t stop himself when he moves forward nose pressing against the apex of your thighs making you squeak. Your fingers twining through his hair. But you don’t pull him away- you don’t think you’d physically be able to make yourself do that at this point.

“You smell so good Jagiya.” He loves how shaky your breath gets when his tongue prods out and licks the wet patch of your arousal. He can tell you’re not wearing any underwear. He can feel his member twitch thinking about how easy it would be to take you here against this counter. He makes himself slow down and savor every inch of you. His hands come up to surround your thighs, Squeezing your skin between his hands groping your ass in tandem as he yanks your legs open farther.

“I don’t like begging but I’d beg to get a taste of you. Will you let me jagiya? I want to taste you so bad.” You’re glad that Jimin can’t see your face because you're certain you’re redder than a tomato. Jimin sucks on the flesh of your thighs, leaving hickey after hickey at the very edge of your sleep shorts. Thoughts of how you could hide them and thrown out of your head as Jimin laves his tongue against you. “I love your thighs too. Have I ever told you that?” he nips at them just as his hand abandoned your front and goes to your rear to move your ass cheeks apart.

“n-no” you stutter out. Your fingers twining in his hair “you haven’t” You gasp out when Jimin presses a well-placed thumb over your clit. Pressing the silk into it, soaking the fabric further with your wetness.

Your knees are weak. Made shaky by the words Jimin is saying to you. Who knew he had such a dirty mouth? You would have guessed this would be mostly shy hands and less than their touches. But Jimin is the exact opposite of shy; not that you're complaining. Everything about his firm hands that harshly grasp your thighs or the firm pull of his teeth against his skin that has you moaning into the open air could be characterized as hungry. Everything is happening so quickly it feels like your mind is reeling. You can believe this is happening and still you want it too badly to make it stop.

The bathroom door is open, and the door to your bedroom is too- someone could walk in at any moment. Thank god Namjoon was going to be away until that morning. If he was here you don’t know if you could be quiet enough or if you could pull yourself away from this right now.

Jimin is so hungry for you-you realize. Especially when he starts rolling his tongue against your core. Trying to lap up the little amount of your slick that’s soaked through almost sucking on your clit through the fabric. His fingers hook into your shorts tugging them down your thighs and too your ankles.

Jimin wastes no time in partaking in the sweetness of you. The first brush of his tongue against you makes you bite back your moans. “I want to hear you, darling,” his tongue gently flicking up and down your slit, searching for as much of your sweetness as he can find. He feels drunk on you. Moaning against the most intimate part of you at your taste, at the feel of you. “I want to hear what I’m doing to you” Your breath comes out in big gushes as you choke out a groan. He grips underneath your thighs and lifts you to sit you down on the edge of the counter. Digging into your core like a man possessed. The tight circles and broad staccato strokes of his tongue make you shake, as you pant into the open air as you feel your pleasure climbing.

“Jimin.” You say his name like a mantra over and over again. His thumbs come forward to pry your core open, a thumb sinking in to play along the edge of your center, your hole greedily trying to suck him. Your climax barrels towards you unavoidable, your breath chokes his name as your hips roll forward. His hands grab hold of yours; your fingers intertwine as he licks you through your orgasm

Eventually, he pulls away, grinning up at you lovingly and then pressing a kiss against your cheek when you look at him leaving your wetness there. He loves how much of a mess he’s made you; you’re so wet that there’s a little puddle on the countertop.

You look so good under him, lips bitten red, and his hickeys shining pink on your thighs. Looking fucked out and well loved by his hands and mouth, his legs in-between your thighs keeping you open for him. He can feel you shaking. He pulls away from you for a second and you whine, your hands fisting in his long sleeve shirt. He grins. Stepping away from you to yank off his shirt revealing the miles of his creamy rich skin to your fingers. You lift your hands to run over his hard pectorals and down his chest to skim across his cut lines and hip bones. he shivers underneath your hot palms. He catches your hand when it rubs against his cheek.

“I want you to touch me- to love me in this physical way. You have to know how much I want you.” he flicks his hips forward slowly rocking against your unclothed core. Making you gasp at the hard length that presses against you. “Can You feel how much I want you?” you sit forward sliding your body against his as your shaky feet touch the ground. pushing him away for a second so you can stip out of your shots.

“What are you doing?” Jimin asks his voice shakey as you walk towards the shower, turning it on. You turn to him, lifting your sweatshirt over your head revealing all of you too him. His eyes eat you up hungrily as you give him what you hope is a seductive and inviting look, trying to hide your nervousness.

“Showering, want to join?” you step in. Giving him a moment to decide again if he wants this with you. He wastes no time in shucking his pants and shirt. Mildly worried for a moment that you’ll judge him and find him lacking.

The first press of Jimin’s bare skin against your back underneath the hot funnel of water makes you groan. You’re still shaky from the orgasm he gave you, and his wandering hands that skim over your breasts and down your sides do nothing to quell the returning heat burning through your gut. But his hands aren’t as hungry as before. You turn around, letting your eyes wander over the whole of him. Over his generous length and his gorgeously toned body quickly being soaked under the shower. you tug him forward. Pulling his bare body against yours, his hands shake when they come up to comb through your hair tenderly.

“I love the feeling of your skin against mine.” You say hushed, running your palms up and over his shoulders, enjoying the feel of his muscular back.

“I love it too- I think I’ve loved you for a long time. Since I first showed up here.” “You’ve loved me since I first rubbed your ears.” you giggle, Jimin presses his smiling face against the wet skin of your shoulder, like he's trying to hide it.

“That might be an exaggeration.” His lips brush against yours again and he can't get enough of the feel of your skin against his. Jimin takes the body wash dispenses a generous amount of soap onto his hands, then rubs a line of bubbles across your arm where earlier blood splattered, slowly washing you.

“I want to wash you- I want to see all of you and have all of you to myself. For as long as you’ll let me.”

“I want every inch of you Jimin.”

“You’d let me ruin you that easily?”

“You already have” You reach for some soap to lather into his hair, he groans against your fingers as you carefully wash around the edges of his ears. All the while his hands brush against your sides, your collar bones, your arms, and it’s like he can’t get enough of you. You let him watch you his eyes sometimes fluttering closed as he leans into you. You guide him underneath the waterfall shower letting the water wash out the suds before you reach for the soap.

“Let me” The first brush of his soapy hands against your cunt has you jolting forward into his touch. You gasp and find him watching your every moment as his fingers explore you. He bites his lower lip as his gaze snags on your open-mouthed expression.

“Is this where you want me to touch you? You loved it so much the first time and that was just my tongue.” Jimin asks is a low gravely voice as he nips at the side of your jaw. You nod feebly, biting your lips and giving yourself away to the pleasure as you feel the pads of his fingers tickle feather lights touches on your outer lips dragging them apart. You whimper softly. Your hips stutter forward to follow his hands, but Jimin merely tuts, moving his hand away.

“You’ll have to use your big girl words if you want something.”

“Jimin I want you to make love to me.” Jimin swallows his rich brown eyes searching your face for a hint of something.

But “alright” is all he says. guiding his face back to yours, leaning his forehead against yours under the hot stream of water. “alright” he repeats.

The next brush of his lips against yours is just as hot and demanding as the first. Your hand trails down his pectorals reaching for his length finding it hot and heavy as your fingertips brush his head.

“Don’t tease me.” He says breathlessly.

You grin like the Cheshire cat. “But you seemed to enjoy teasing me so much.” it's your turn to drop to your knees in front of him, placing a kiss and a hickey on either side of his member before you lick tentatively along his head and down a vein. He lets out a strangled moan- his gentle but demanding hands finding your head and cradling it softly.

“y/n” he groans out, begging wordlessly for you to end his wanting. You grin as you wrap your hand around him, making sure you keep eye contact with him as you open your jaw wide and sink your mouth onto him until he hits the back of your throat. His body jerks when he’s fully inside your warm wet mouth, letting out a string of curse words before his hand's fist in your hair in Ernest. His head tipped back away from the string of water so that it hits only his chest now.

It's warm and wet and heavenly as you bob your head along his length, leaving Jimin’s thighs shaking. Every single little noise he makes your core wetter and you’re sure you would be dripping onto the floor now if it wasn’t for the water.

“Your mouth- holy fuck” Jimin praises, his hips cant forward unintentional. “wait wait wait-“ pulling you off of him and tugging you onto your feet and into his arms. Almost making you slip. His kisses are less coordinated but betray his wanting. “If you keep doing that, then i...” he turns off the shower and picks you up in one movement, you yelp and giggle as he opens the glass door and carries you in his arms out into your bedroom tossing you onto the bed.

He goes to the door. He sends one glance back at you where you lay, pausing for a moment, stretched out on your bed, spread out and ready for him to take and cherish as his own.

“If you want to back out back out now…”

You shake your head roughly, “never.” The sound of the lock on your door clicking sends a thumb to your already waiting core. Jimin is on you as fast as he can, pressing kiss after kiss to your face to your collarbones, to your neck. The only thing that fills you is thoughts of Jimin Jimin Jimin.

his thumbs rub gently at your nipples. The lustful eyes that look down at you with equal parts want and devotion. Even the first brush of his hardness against your warm and waiting core. He twines his hands with yours again pinning them to the bed above you. Your hips chase his trying to get him inside of you when he brushes against you again. His joy filled smirk that greets you makes your heart stutter. “Someone’s impatient.” Your retort is silenced as he sinks into turning your words into a garbled moan, above you Jimin grunts at the initial tightness.

“You’re so wet jagiya, all for me.”

“All for you, only for you” you moan out as he sinks as deep as he can into you, the tip of his head just barely brushing your cervix. Your back arches against him. None of your old lovers have ever made you feel this full- or your body this alive. You feel like every movement of Jimin sends ricochets of sparks along the inside of your skin. You’ve never had sex that felt so full-bodied before.

“Jagi- I can’t” Jimin stutters out breathing heavy, you press a kiss to his lips.

“you don’t have to hold back with me.” Jimin starts a slow pace that is all long deep strokes; he takes longer going in than going out. His thrusts almost punchy against you.

You share every pant, every breath, every I love you that he mutters like a prayer against your mouth. His hands eventually detach from your hands so that he can worship your body too. Your eyes flutter open to watch him- only to find he’s watching you. He doesn’t want to forget any of this, any of how you twist and moan below him in the throws of your pleasure.

“Jimin- please” you beg, “I need you to go faster.” he leans into you and tugs your legs around his waist, sinking in hard and pulling out just as quickly making you cry out. You’re quickly coming underneath him.

You clenching around his length has his hips fluttering against yours in the most delightful way. You feel his hips trembling as his hot slick cum shoots into you, filling you with a warm satisfying feeling that has you throwing your head back against the pillow and digging your fingertips into his forearms, sighing at the relief of it.

But he doesn’t stop doesn’t let up against you- if anything he’s harder inside of you, making you feel all the more full as the combined weight of his cum and his dick fill you. Especially when he pulls out and thrusts forward more roughly then he has yet turned your words into a strangled groan.

“Jimin what are you-” but his mouth covers yours hushing your protests.

“I might cum easily- but I certainly have more than one round in me.” He leans down kissing you again- it’s like he can’t get enough of you. “What about you jagiya? I want to feel you cum around me- do you think you could do that for me? I know you have another in you.”

and it’s messy, the amount of your cum leaking from your slit as Jimin renews a punishing pace without giving you time to calm down has you twitching and panting. Moaning out his name loud enough that if anyone where home they would certainly hear you.

You almost bite your lip to keep your moans in but then you remember Jimin’s earlier warning, he stretches your leg upwards hooking it over his shoulder- and though it’s not exactly the most comfortable position Jimin reaches such a new depth inside of you that its worth the strain. The two of you are moaning out again in tandem as you clench around him. His forearms shaking as you reach up to run your fingers roughly through his hair as he’s pressing a scalding kiss against your collarbone.

“I love how you feel around me. Like you were made to have me and I was made to fit inside of you. I hope you know that I’m going to make love to you again and again until you’re so full of me that you’ll never remember what it was like to have another man inside of you let alone know how to want a cock that’s not mine.” You smile against his lips.

“I already told you that I’d gladly be ruined by you.” he grins against your lips as well.

“Then why don’t you cum for me again baby girl.” His hand goes down to rub smooth, almost feather light teasing circles against your clit as he pounds into you, he bites the juncture of your throat harder. Your shaking, every inch of you trembling like a leaf as you shudder through the beginnings of your orgasm. You twitch around him, your orgasm washing over you in waves, black stars shower your vision as your back arches pressing your chest into Jimin’s.

“That’s it, baby,” Jimin growls above you, his hands slowing down on your clit as you continue to tremble from the overstimulation, Jimin cums again as your tight pussy milks him, filling you further, the rest of it squelching out to cover your hips as Jimin twitches inside of you, releasing the last few strings of his cum. He slides out of you, finally softening and spent but not done with you yet as he pulls himself down to watch himself leaking out of you. You squeal when you feel him press a kiss to your entrance.

“Jimin” you sob as his tongue pokes your entrance again, your body feels ropey and not all there, the throws of your passion still making everything feel hazy, the only thing that still there is the press of his tongue against your entrance moaning again as the taste of the two of you mix together a delightful combination on his tongue, but the overstimulation makes your hips twist away.

“I’m so sensitive Jimin please.” Jimin licks you again once, then twice before he drags himself up to press a kiss into your mouths, softer this time then the scalding ones he gave you earlier. The tang of your lovemaking making you blush as Jimin pulls away from you staring down at you with something akin to reverence. Your forehead rests against his.

“I love you,” he says again, his fingers trailing along the edge of your jaw. “I love you so much.” You smile kissing the inside of his palm.

“I love you too.” You say quietly, and in the half-light of your bedroom, the words almost feel like something secret and a promise. But you’d shout them from the rooftops if he’d asked you to. You spend a moment just looking at each other, marveling at the fact that both of you somehow feel the same. Until you shift and grimace feeling the sticky mess in between your thighs. Jimin laughs at your expression and gets up to get a washcloth. which he uses to clean you with gentle careful strokes. Pressing a kiss to the inside of your knees.

“How did you like that jagiya?” he asks teasingly, his fingers playing across the underside of your knees. Your fucked out grin is more than enough of a confirmation. You tug him down for more kisses, though these are sleepier and sweeter. Jimin pulls you against his chest and its there that you fall asleep, the taste of love lingering on your tongue.

The knock that comes from the door in the early hours of the morning startles the two of you out of sleep. You send Jimin one scared look before you make to get out of bed but he grabs your wrist.

“What if its Namjoon y/n?” He says gesturing to state, it’s obvious what the two of you had done the night before- even your body feels pleasantly sore and you're sure your hair is as crazy as Jimin’s tangled curly locks.

“It’s not” comes Taehyung’s voice from outside the door. “But the fact that you’re worried it’s Namjoon makes me concerned Jimin.” Taehyung knocks again, “come on y/n.” you give Jimin a withering look as you sling the sheet tighter around your chest and leave Jimin on the bed, his waist covered with a blanket.

“what Tae?” you ask when you wrench open the door, Tae takes one glance at your sheet dress and another at Jimin’s bare chest stretched out on your bed before he says “ah, I see” casting a single unabashed look over Jimin’s nakedness.

“Namjoon wants you packed and ready to go within the hour, I’m guessing he’d rather you be dressed too,” He says.

“Did he say where we’re going?” Tae shakes his head and moves to leave.

“Oh and y/n,” he casts a glance over his shoulder, his eyes appraising your sheet clad appearance, “your secret’s safe with me.”

“Thank you,” Jimin calls from inside your bedroom.

“Do you think he’ll tell Namjoon?” Jimin asks from your bed as you go to get dressed.

“No” you say as you toss him a pair of his boxers.

“Why?” he asks as he tugs them on and slides out of the bed. The glance you send his way is forgiving.

“Because he knows you’re the best protector I could ask for.” Jimin’s arms wrap around your waist, and you can feel his smile as it pressed into your bare shoulder. “Tell me what other ways I’m the best for you?”

Namjoon isn’t pacing when you enter his office, he’s not even moving. He’s just standing over his desk looking as lost as ever, Hoseok and Jungkook are there too, along with Seokjin whose talking and pointing at certain schematics hung on the wall. It's unlike all of them to look so out of it. But Seokjin falls silent when you enter trailed by Jimin.

“You wanted to talk to me?” you say softly, scanning your brother for injuries. Namjoon gestures at the others to leave and the small nod that he gives Jimin also is enough of a confirmation for you. You barely glance at the pieces of paper he passes your way before you’re protesting.

“Plane tickets Namjoon? I thought you promised me you wouldn’t send me away.” Namjoon catches your arm as you go to throw the tickets down on his desk, and his hushed whisper of your name you look up and see why he’s been so silent. Namjoon looks like he’s aged 5 years with how little he’s slept, deep bags carve out space for his eyes. This Namjoon doesn't look angry or determined like you're used too if anything it looks like he’s resigned to the situation.

And it scares you-you hadn’t realized that the war had gotten to this point already.

“That’s twice I’ve almost lost you in the last month- and I can't let there be a third, so please don’t fight me. I can’t fight a war with you too” he says dejectedly. And you hear what he doesn’t need to say, that he can’t lose you too. You know your brother hates to go back on his word and that he promised he wouldn’t send you away. “I can’t fight this war if I’m always wondering if you’re safe.” Tears fill your eyes.

“And I won't be able to breathe if I don’t know if you are,” you say hushed.

“please, y/n, do this for me, please.” He looks at you like you’re his world- like he cants bear to have you far away even though that’s what he’s asking you to do.

So unlike the other times you asked, you take a look at the ticket in your hands. The pair of them- one for you and one for Jimin. You wipe the tears out of your eyes and let out a shaky breath, as you settle on doing what you must, what you know is right.

“What’s the plan then.” Namjoon lets out a relieved sigh and hands you a folder, you scan the documents quickly, passports for you and Jimin, and student visas signed this morning.

“Your safe house is in Portland, Oregon, I’ve hired the local gang there to keep an eye on you but it will be mostly just you and Jimin. In one month if things haven’t calmed down I’m going to send one of the boys to live with you for a while. If anything happens to me-”

“No” you interrupt your brother, putting a hand on his arm, “we don’t talk like that.”

Namjoon grits his teeth, “if anything happens, I’ve already wired your trust fund to be accessible to you now, and in an international bank, you shouldn’t have to work for the rest of your life if you invest some of it, but I know you'll be smart about it- you where always smarter than me when it came to stuff like that.”

“Don’t”

Namjoon smiles softly down at you. “Don’t do what?”

“Say goodbye to me like that.” You reach up and wrap your hands around his neck, pulling him down for a hug that he reciprocates.

“We’ll be alright y/n.”

“Promise,” you say muffled into his arm.

You feel him nod against you. He pulls away from you, “are you and Jimin packed?” you nod, “there’s a car waiting for you in the driveway then.” He swallows thickly. “I’ll help you with your bags,” Namjoon carries your small suitcase down the stairs for you trailed by Jimin, who looks deceptively normal with a jean jacket and baseball cap tossed over his usual black jeans and white shirt.

You give Seokjin a hug while Jimin gives Jungkook a fist bump. Hoseok simply claps him on the back before giving you a short hug. “None of you go dying on me.” You say giving the boys what you hope is an intimidating glare as they pretend not to notice the tears that you cant keep out of your eyes. Yoongi is out with the new recruits but Namjoon promises to give him a hug for you.

Namjoon gives Jimin a handshake, and you see his eyes flare in surprise for a split second before he shoves his hands in his pockets and nods at Jimin. “Thank you for protecting her.”

“It’s what I’m good at.” Is all Jimin says before averting his gaze.

Taehyung musses your hair as he promises he’ll keep them all in one piece but somehow all you can do is look at your brother memorizing every bit of him from his expensive leather shoes to the loose black shirt tossed over a pair of ordinary pants. Looking nothing like the kingpin who was attempting to take down his competition. None of your family really looked like killers.

Namjoon gives the nod Jimin starts to guide you towards the nondescript black car you can’t tear your eyes away from the place that’s always been your home. This could be the last time you see them alive. If the only thing that runs through your head as the car pulls away from your home and you lift a hand in a wave that they all return.

“You’ll see them again,” Jimin says as you wipe the tears out of your eyes, clutching at the envelope in your hands. “I know,” you say. And then relax into silence, The driver takes the quickest route to the airport but even then it still takes an age because of traffic. cutting through downtown, but cars have clogged the byways, and there are so many cars piled so close that you cant see the one in front of you.

“Can you see if it’s an accident?” you ask the driver, a low level of the gang that you've interacted with a few times.

“No, miss y/n,”

“I can hear the sirens, is there a way we can take to avoid the traffic,” Jimin asks, traffic moves on as a crawl. your eyes flicker up to the mirror, widening when you see what’s behind you.

“did you remember my purse?” you ask Jimin carefully, who hands it over to you before you tuck your papers into it.” Jimin gives you a look but says nothing, his eyes flickering up to look in the mirror too.

The black van beside your cars breaks screech and you flinch at the noise, as the news van in front of you sputters. And that’s when your eyes snag on it, someone looking out at you from the back of the car, microphone in their ear.

“We need to get out of here now,” Jimin shouts at the driver but its already too late, the side doors on the vans that trap your car in on either side open and a gun is pointed at you through the open window.

You as your driver pulls out a gun only to be silenced, the splatter of blood hits your face like a wound. Jimin kicks out the door, hitting the gangster in a gut, Jimin exits the car arms raised trying to wrestle the gun out of his hands. but before he has a chance someone fires a taser, which hits him in the back sending him to his knees as he grunts through the clicking pain.

You yell his name the same second that your door is wrenched open and hands grab for you. Pulling at your shoulders as you try to fight them. Your eyes on Jimin as he slumps forward his muscles twitching with electricity,

Someone is pushing into the car and moving your dead driver just as a hand clamps over your mouth smelling antiseptic and pulls you out of the car your feet scrambling against the blood-soaked leather. and you struggle not to inhale what you know is chloroform.

A pair of arms pulls you out of the car and into the van just as you see Jimin disappear into the other van twist and shouting your name as it takes half a dozen gangsters to restrain him.

As you kick and scream against the hand constricting you as whoever holds you lands in the bed of the van someone clothes the door cutting you off from the outside world. You look up, terrified, into the eyes of none other than Chanyeol, who’s looking down at you with little remorse, looking like a cat would at a mouse only with half as much interest. like you're dirt underneath his boot, you scream

“Someone shut her up.” Is all he says as he sits back, a boot hits your stomach and you can't resist taking in a sharp breath. The chloroform enters your lungs as your legs go numb, The last thing you see is the quirk of Chanyeol’s mouth as he smiles down at you before everything goes dark.

PART 9

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