#anyway we have a turkey and a ham

[shower-phantom-ideas]

Child Danny by degree of the eyeguys to have him at peak power for the future but he somehow gets forced to live with Wes Weston.

Wes forced to adopt Danny is the funniest shit. Spent his life trying to out the guy now hes legally responsible for the guy. Whos very smug for someone who can’t even use the coffee pot.

Danny isnt too happy to be forced back to a 6 year old. His new slightly more emotional body is maybe acting out a little ok sue him.

Wes is now so torn between finally being able to prove himself right and keeping his now ?child? Safe.

Danny btw still denies being anything but a normal guy.

[tigergendermoved]

Dudeee I'm so excited for Christmas I don't care about Jesus or Santa or even the gifts really but I love the seasonal scented candles and also Christmas music and the death of mosquitos. And of course the Christmas lasagna

[ashwhowrites]

oh would you write about eddie x girlfriend reader whos recovering from an eating disorder & he’s on full support and comfort. today she decided to let eddie have control over what she eats for the day. at some parts (maybe like bread with chocolate or some snacks) she starts getting overwhelmed & cry’s & he’s there, comforting her, giving her head/forehead kisses, holds her hands, talks to her & eats with her, so she doesn’t feel alone.

and i would really like to read more about wayne, so maybe the next day she asks wayne to decide what she’ll eat today & he’s really excited to be there for her & help her in such progress. both munsons comfort her & she’s so thankful!<3

I hope this is what you were looking for and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting <3

⚠️ mentions of ED

Recovery

Y/N was recovering from an eating disorder, trying every day to move one step forward. It was hard to do on her own, so her boyfriend vowed to help her every step of the way. Which he did. Eddie was so patient and supportive, she never felt that before.

She wanted to give herself a small challenge to push her further. She asked Eddie to pick what she'd eat throughout the day and he was so excited to help her. He immediately agreed with a huge smile and began to work on his list.

"Breakfast is served," Eddie announced, proudly placing the plate in front of her. He sat down next to her in his chair, with a plate for him as well.

Y/N looked down at the toast covered in Nutella, overwhelmed by the thick spread. She felt tears welling in her eyes but tried to remain calm. Eddie placed his hand on hers and squeezed it.

"We'll go slow. Just breathe. Here I'll even cut it in half and we will start with that." He said, using a knife as he cut the toast in half, taking a piece and throwing it on his plate.

"Not as scary, right? Just half the toast. We'll do the first bite together." Eddie said, picking up his toast as he held it in his mouth. She looked at him as she slowly picked up the toast. Both take a bite.

"That's my girl!" Eddie cheered as she swallowed the first bite. Eddie pressed a chocolatey kiss to her forehead.

"Ew Eddie!"

~~~

For lunch, Eddie decided on sandwiches. His sandwich was loaded with turkey, ham, cheese, lettuce and tomatoes. She felt herself getting overwhelmed as he placed down his plate.

"No worries, baby. You get the most spectacular sandwich combination out there!" She smiled when he placed down peanut butter and jelly, the bread cut into a heart.

"And if you want some, no pressure, some grapes." A small bowl of grapes is placed between them.

Eddie slowly ate with her, taking small bites as she ate. He made sure they always finished eating at the same time so she didn't feel pressured to eat faster.

Just like breakfast, he walked her through it, squeezing her hand and kissing her forehead when she finished.

~~~

After dinner, Y/N felt very proud of herself. And Eddie reminded her just how proud he was.

The next day, they were visiting Wayne. Y/N thought why not let Wayne decide what she eats for the day?

Wayne was just as excited as Eddie, she laughed at the resemblance. Wayne didn't eat well-balanced meals as it was, so she had a feeling he'd pick the most random things.

And he did.

She had a day filled with snacks and not meals. But she liked it.

"Wayne, she's not eating cookies for lunch!" Eddie scolded him, but Wayne brushed him off.

"I think the girl wants cookies, maybe milk?" Wayne asked, Y/N lit up at the idea.

"Oh my gosh, yes!"

Eddie groaned as Wayne and Y/N sat close on the couch, both diving into the cookies.

"Grab the milk will ya?" Wayne asked through a mouthful of cookies. Eddie looked at him with a disapproving look but grabbed the milk anyway.

Dinner happened to be tomato soup, something Eddie approved of this time.

"I'm proud of you, kid. Just remember that." Wayne said as they prepared to leave. Y/N smiled at his words, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug.

Some days would be harder than others, but at least her boys were always there to help.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergentreblogs @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

@steddiemas Day 18 -  Classic Christmas Songs (The First Nöel)

pairing: steddie | word count: 1,924 | rated: G

It didn’t take too long after the song started for Eddie to want out.

He debated staying, just to listen to Steve sing along to it under his breath while he meticulously weaved strips of dough over a pie with what Eddie thinks is way too huge a mound of blueberries, but even that didn’t help.

Steve’s ‘everyone over for Christmas dinner before Christmas’ idea made Eddie skeptical at first, having literally everyone (the Hendersons, Mrs. Wheeler along with Nancy, Mike, and Holly, The Sinclairs, the Hopper-Byers clan, Gareth and Freak along with Jeff and his mom, the Buckleys (of course), and even he and Wayne) together under one roof seemed like a disaster waiting to happen.

But no.

Everyone got along great, the lot of them snacking on meats and cheeses, stolen candy and cookies that Steve had made over the last couple days, Wayne, Hop, and Claudia are fussing over two whole turkeys and a huge ham, and Joyce, Karen and Lucas are whipping up huge batches of side dishes.

And it doesn’t usually affect him this bad anymore, but that damned song paired with all of their huge chosen family together under one roof like this, warm, happy, healthy…he had to leave. 

He did not want to get emotional in front of them.

The sound of the door sliding on its track breaks Eddie’s reverie. It was longer than he thought it’d take for someone to come looking for him, but he suspects that it was done on purpose.

He doesn’t look back at who decided to grace him with their presence, but immediately knows who it is when a hat gets pushed down onto his head, just a bit too far down.

“You’re not catching a cold on my watch, Munson.”

Eddie pushes the fold of the knit cap off his eyes, “Wasn’t planning on it Steve-o.”

“Coulda fooled me. As if trying to withstand a whole winter in a leather jacket isn’t gonna give you a cold.”

A snort of a laugh escapes Eddie’s lips at Steve’s sarcastic tone. “I have, and no colds yet.”

“Uh huh. Sure.” Steve says, sitting down beside him.  “That’s why you borrowed my old puffer coat last time you were here, right?”

The lone poolside chair not packed away for the season wasn’t his first choice of seating, but it was the only one. Though Steve’s dry heat beside him is already a welcome balance to the cold metal and plastic of the chair.

Eddie’s lips twitch up into a brief smile, “I didn’t want to get mine all wet.”

They fall silent after that, and Eddie fishes his lighter and pack of Marlboro’s out of his pocket, pulling one out of the carton and lighting it up.

He offers one to Steve, but he waves him off.

“So.” Steve says after about half the cigarette was gone.

“So?”

“Are you alright, Eddie?”

He stays silent, debating whether or not to actually tell Steve what was wrong or just brush it off again.

“Was it something I–we said? Or did?” Eddie caught the slip, and decided he was going to tell him, but Steve continued on, “I know you’re not the biggest fan of Christmas anyway..”

“No, it’s not—” Eddie heaves a sigh, and even he can hear the exasperated relenting in it. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Steve. None of you did.”

He takes a drag and blows out a long stream of steamy breath and smoke. It hits him then, before he even speaks, that he’s being dramatic. Has been being dramatic. What a stupid thing to get emotional about.

“My middle name is Nöel. Like, fully, exactly how it’s supposed to be spelled for the holidays. The two dots over the O and everything. So it’s just me being dramatic; it gets annoying to hear all season.”

At first, Eddie thinks he’s gotten away with it, that Steve’s silence is just satisfied understanding, but just before he’s about to put himself back on the right way to go back inside, Steve speaks again.

“Where’d the name come from?”

Eddie finally looks over at him, taking in the comically mismatched pink My Little Pony scarf (Erica’s) and bright safety green beanie (Robin’s) he’d thrown on before coming out to the patio. “..Huh?”

Eloquent as ever, Munson.

“C’mon man.” Steve says, rolling his eyes fondly and nudging Eddie’s shoulder with his own. “You act like I don’t know you.”

Eddie’s “You don’t.” is automatic.

Steve just scoffs, “You disappeared without a word, man; normally you announce, with wildly different levels of dramatics each time, that you’re going to smoke, or you ‘gotta take a leak’. You didn’t do that this time so naturally that means this was more than just getting annoyed by a Christmas carol.”

Eddie blinks at him. Stunned by the proof that he, Eddie Munson, was one of the people Steve used his almost insane levels of observation on after all. Usually it’s wasted on the kids; Steve’s acute ability to hone in on exactly what each of the party needs at any given time—how Steve has encyclopedic knowledge on each of their favorite snacks, their preferred drinks, games, movies, which blankets they like to steal from the Harringtons’ nearly bottomless linen closet—almost always goes unappreciated. 

“I may not get a lot of things, but I do pay attention to the people I care about.” Steve continues on, voicing Eddie’s thoughts.

“You a mind reader now too, Harrington?”

Steve grins at him, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “Nah man, I’m just a damn good babysitter.”

Eddie huffs out another laugh, “Sorry to tell ya this, but I don’t need to be babied or sat.”

He doesn’t say anything more, just waits for Eddie to continue.

“It was my mom.” Eddie finally concedes, “She gave me the name Nöel. So you kinda hit it on the head, there is more to it than just the song.

“Wayne says she chose it because she loved the season, that it was when she felt most at peace no matter what else was going on in her life.”

Steve is quiet beside him, just existing in the space while Eddie finishes off his cigarette.

“And that’s why I get so salty about Christmas. It’s not because she died around this time of year, which doesn’t help of course, it’s because she loved the holiday so much. I mean,” he snorts, “She named me after it after all. So this time of year always felt so wrong without her.”

He stubs the flame under his boot, scrubbing it into the concrete and promising himself he’ll come back for the butt later (he’ll forget). 

The younger man is silent for two more breaths.

“Eddie, I am so sorry..”

All he can do is shrug, “It’s fine Steve, I’m used to that song by now–well, I was.”

“What changed?”

Eddie lets out another steadying breath. “When I was little, down in Tennessee, it was worse because I was little. All the crafts and games and things they did with first and middle names in elementary school y’know?” He sees Steve nod out of the corner of his eye. “The kids down there would sing the damn song at me to make fun of me. After I came up here to live with Wayne it got better…kinda.

“The kids here didn’t know what my middle name was, and Wayne would switch the radio station if that godforsaken song would come on come December, but even then, every time it did come up…it was like a pointed little finger poked into the bruise left behind after mom died.” Eddie says, jabbing the air in front of him with his own finger in a harsh movement before letting his hand drop back down to his lap. “It was starting to get better, hearing my name like that.”

“How so?” Steve’s voice lilts into something eager, but just barely.

Eddie sucks in a deep breath and the cold, dry air burns his nose as he does.

“You.” he states, using all the breath he’d taken in on the one word. 

“Me?” Steve asks in disbelief.

“Ever since I found out that you also think November 1st means Christmas decorations need to be up.” Eddie nods, he wasn’t about to tell him about the soupy gut feeling he’d gotten when he heard Steve singing along to that stupid fuckin’ song. “Annoying, but it was the same when I was little.

“You should see the pictures,” he grins, continuing on, “A little Batman helping mom put up the tree because I didn’t want to take off my costume–even slept in it a couple times, waking up the next morning to hot chocolate, candy canes, and popcorn garlands.”

“That’s adorable.” Steve laughs, and Eddie laughs with him, his chest feeling miles looser than when he first came out here.

They’re silent for a bit, listening to the muffed yells of the kids coming from inside about who knows what.

“I’ll follow Wayne’s example,” Steve says eventually. “I’ll make sure to change the station, won’t sing it any—”

“Nah, no way man. You don’t have to do that. Like I said, it was getting better.”

“Still, I don’t want to make you upset.”

“Don’t worry about it Stevie,” he sniffs, looking over the empty pool, “I like when you sing it.” he admits before he can stop himself. 

Aw fuck.

“You do?”

 “I do.” 

What the fuck are you doing?!

“You do.” Steve states as if he doesn’t believe him.

Eddie nods silently, gulps around the nerves in his throat. “It’s stupid, but it’s like you’re singing about me rather than at me. It’s…nice.”

Steve falls quiet, so he turns to face him again; Steve’s eyes are wide, cheeks red from the cold and otherwise pale.

Shocked. And not in a good way.

“Just don’t tell any of the other jerks, ‘kay?” Eddie laughs, it comes out strained. “They’d definitely be singing it at me if they found out.”

Steve’s face thaws into something softer at that, his lips twitch like they want to smile. 

“Also, I hardly doubt Henderson’s got nearly as good a voice as you do.”

That finally melts him completely, “Henderson’s actually got some pipes on him.” he laughs softly and knocks his shoulder into Eddie’s. “You should hear his Madonna.”

“Yeah no. No thank you.” Eddie says as he stands, “C’mon Stevie, let’s go back in and eat. It’s time to eat already, right?” He offers him a hand.

Steve takes it and pulls himself up, “After you, Edward Nöel.” he does a sarcastic half-bow, waving Eddie forward.

Eddie scoffs at him, but starts toward the door nevertheless. “That’s not even what Eddie’s short for.”

“Aw, what?! What’s it short for?”

“Nuh uh, I already bared one part of my soul tonight.” (“Aw come on!”) Maybe I’ll tell you after we’ve been friends for another nine months or so.”

Steve laughs as they reach the sliding door. “Lookin’ forward to it, Eds.” 

Eddie’s about to slide it open when Steve suddenly stops him, grabbing his wrist.

“Wait–Eddie, before we go back inside, I wanted to ask you something.”

“Uh, yeah, sure. Shoot.” he turns to face him properly.

Eddie watches Steve’s eyes flicker over his face. They hover somewhere below his nose before coming back up to lock onto his eyes.

“Can I kiss you?’

“C–can you kiss– What?! Why? When—”

Steve stops Eddie's spluttering when he tilts his head back to look above them.

God. Damn. Mistletoe.

yes, my first name is noelle. why do you ask? no, no, of course i didn't give eddie that middle name just to vent about that damn song... 😳😅

other parts! Pt. 1 (Day 1) | Pt. 2 (Day 2) | Pt. 3 (Day 5) | Pt. 4 (Day 6) | Pt. 5 (Day 7) | Pt. 6 (Day 11) | Pt. 7 (Day 13) | Pt. 8 (Day 18) [YOU ARE HERE] | Pt. 9 (Day 21) | Pt. 10 (Day 25) also on AO3! this year

[sunny-reis]

같이 꿈을 꾸고 싶어 - dream with you

pairing: huh yunjin x reader

synopsis: an *actually* short oneshot about escapism and yunjin

tags: gender-neutral reader but all of this is implied to be sapphic to some extent (girl in red mentions 🤯). i don't know interpret it as whatever. extremely descriptive paragraphs abt the setting and yunjin? gay as hell. reader lives and goes to college in massachusetts. don't ask why (i do not know. have fun going to mit i guess.)

word count: 932

author's note: YURRRRR i wrote this half-asleep and feeling sapphic as FUCKKKKK enjoy

“massachusetts is such a stupid place to go to college.”

you raise a curious eyebrow at the comically focused yunjin splayed across your far-too-small dorm bed, flipping mindlessly through one of the many books you possess with scrunched eyebrows and a strawberry lollipop in hand. the small speaker perched atop the bedframe plays your “chill” playlist on shuffle at a relatively loud volume as your roommate isn't present, the strumming of an acoustic guitar and her unabashed humming filling the room amid the quiet. it’s a comfortable silence, nothing but the occasional flip of a page from yunjin, the scribbling (and rub of an eraser) from you, the soft pitter-patter of the rain on the window adjacent to your bed, and girl in red.

“and why is that?” you ask. all she gives you is a shrug.

“the drive to see you is stupidly long, and honestly? boston isn't even that interesting of a city to be worth it.”

“not even to see me?”

“yeah, no,” she elbows you with a small giggle, “definitely not.”

you roll your eyes, shaking your head and looking back at your notebook. the colorful pastel stationery strewn all over your table does nothing to give the illusion of a put-together student; you sigh, folding your arms and laying your head down. there's no use focusing on work when you're so distracted. by what, you can't pinpoint, but it must have something to do with the way yunjin’s humming is all you can hear and the way her hair falls over her shoulder barely covered by the flannel she has on. it definitely isn't the way marks on her nose stand out despite the bright makeup on her face, or the way her glasses sit too perfectly on the bump or her nose, or the way her cheeks flush a rosy pink when she looks up to see you lost in her eyes.

her presence slips into every crack and crevice in your heart.

“‘whatcha looking at?” she asks. you blink, devoid of any thought for a short while until she waves a puzzled hand in front of your eyes, snapping you out of your trance.

“hello? earth to [y/n], you there?” you nod, sitting up to match the yunjin now resting her head on her arms on your desk. she stares up at you, eyes starry and wide; many say they're the windows of the soul, but right now, you're unable to tell a thing. it's terrifying – you swallow the thought that she may be weirded out by your not-so-subtle starstruck, longing gazes.

yunjin stands up after a moment of silence, stretching her arms and suppressing a yawn. you check the analog clock on the wall that reads 6:43.

“we should go get dinner, i’m so hungry i can't focus.” you say, clearing your throat. she gives you a small smile.

“i was just about to say that! i’m starving.”

“i’ll drive.” yunjin nods. you don't need words to say you’re going to your special place, a small cafe a 15-minute drive away from campus. neither of you are impartial to making the short walk in the rain, but it's always been a tradition of yours to drive and listen to the same music on the same route.

the rain stops by the time the two of you get your food (a cup of tomato soup and crackers for you, and a turkey-ham sandwich with extra cheese for yunjin – it's always been the same. of course, the two of you always end up getting snacks from the food hall anyways, but there's sentiment to the consistency). unlike before, though, you decide to eat at the park; and so here you are, rocking on the uncomfortably small rubber swings and conversing peacefully amid the handful of children messing around on the playground. it's filling, how content yunjin looks – your crackers are left untouched as you catch yourself staring at her again, unable to break free of the captivating siren’s song of her humming and serenity.

“penny for your thoughts?” she asks abruptly, clearly having caught onto the cacophany in your head. you hate it when she does that.

“not much, i guess.” you shrug.

“oh come on, don't give me that,” she raises an eyebrow, “i’ve known you for years, you can't hide from me.”

“i dunno, i guess i'm just … turbulent?” and there begins the monologue.

everything pours out. yunjin watches, face falling at the harsh words you use to demonize yourself for feeling the way you do; falling in love isn't a crime, no matter whether your feelings are reciprocated or not. she holds back the urge to laugh at the way you neglect to think about her feelings. there are so many fleeting gazes and sleepless, longing-filled nights you haven't seen – she feels the exact same as you.

after your spiel and a number of apologies, yunjin clasps your hands in hers. your eyes widen, looking down as if avoiding her gaze will soften the blow.

“stop tearing yourself down for being human, [y/n]. i promise you, even if i didn't feel the same, it wouldn't be worth punishing yourself for being in love!” she cries, grasping your now-shaking hands tighter. she continues, wiping the occasional tear that falls from your eyes with a soft touch. she's never appeared to be an angel, a heavenly being, more than she does now.

words aren't needed to express how giddy you are when she spells out her feelings for you, topping it all off with a small kiss on the nose.

[bruciemilf]

Would you grace me with some head cannons about the Batkids and Bruce's relationship? I've run into way too many posts being too happy about the kids being awful to Bruce and fics making Jason into this one note character whose only personality trait is telling Bruce to kill himself. Like we can have him acting out bc of his trauma without turning him into an irredeemable monster, can we not? Anyway. I'd love a little sweetness if you have some to spare.

Aw, I'm sorry you haven't had the best experience!! I feel you. Sometimes ppl don't properly separate teasing from straight up bullying, that's why I tend to read so few fics. But!! Ask and you shall receive.

-

Bruce packs them all lunches with personalised stickers!! They thought it was Alfred's work up until they actually tasted it. Little brown bags covered in bird stickers, filled with the most RANCID shit you could think of.

They love it.

Jason's has a red robin, of course. A doodle of a dragon with red ink. He has turkey ham with Nutella. Bruce heard its good for protein.

Dick has a bluejay and a doodle of an elephant. Cass has a tiger sticker and a black bat that almost takes over the entire bag. Tim has a mockingbird and a scribbled kitten with big eyes.

Stephanie has a peacock, a doodle of a smiling golden lab on the side. Duke has a butterfly with a pretty, stylised koala bear that he takes hundreds of pictures of from different angles.

Dami has a scorpion sticker with a panda drawing. He shows it off to Jon with only mild gloating.

Bruce claims he has no idea where these lunch bags came from, but those bandaged fingers don't lie. You can't convince me they don't kiss his cheek before they take off, too.

Even Jason. He says he still wears the helmet when he does it, so it doesn't count. They unanimously vote that it does.

[multifandom-nerds-blog]

Thinking about Ducktales again. More theoratical analyzing. More ranting. More precisely about Ducktales humanity. (Less a biological take, more societal and historical)

I don't remember if there were any monkey or ape characters, but nevertheless evolution in the Ducktales world decided that, nope I don't like apes, it's gonna be primarily birds, ducks specifically who turn human

But it's not only birds, there also mammals, both carnivores (I think more of those?) and herbivores, yet again, birds are still the majority.

So whatever it was that caused the evolution, my take is that it's more birds simply cause "birds" were just already far more wide-spread around the globe due to their natural flying abilities pre evolution. And Ducks, cause, Idk, ducks are everywhere.

Anyways, the "animals" were probably evenly hit by evolution in general, but a lot of other species (lions, tigers, subspecies like pandas) in the wild were bound by territory. Ergo, due to more birds existing all over the globe, more humans in the modern age ended up being part of bird species cause they were more wide-spread in the beginning due to pre-evolution times. Also certain areas having more dangers (stone age, bronce age, I'm not sure how the early ages are called) for humans then others being a reason why some species exist more than others. (Again, human lions or tigers might have not been able to build bigger civilizations in early history due to having animal lions or tigers as dangers) (I know lions and tigers do not live in the same are btw, even if it might sound like that)

Now... Birds are basically the top of society in the Ducktales universe. They are more. They are everywhere. They are much more dominant. And I have thoughts about discrimination and the irony of birds that are "prey" being the majority of Ducktales humanity, but I should not only make a separate post for this, but also really sort my words so this doesn't end up sounding to weird.

Going back to the society: It somehow happened that human animals and animal animals live together. And in a way mostly similar to us. Pets exist. Feeding ducks with bred crumbs is a thing (that scene is why I'm writing this post). And people eat cheese, milk, eggs and meat.

Now, I don't know which is weirder. A human dog having another animal dog as a pet (hello Goofy) or a chicken eating chicken soup? (Huey wanted to give Scrooge chicken soup while Gyro was sitting on his computer and he didn't react. I guess cocked/baked duck/geese/turkey is also being eaten) Does it not count as cannibalism if it's not a conscious human, or do chickens just not eat chicken, pigs no ham and so on?

I am very much aware that this is just a disney show, targeted to kids mostly, and that those characters are all animals because they've always been animals. But I'm going between things like Zoomania and Beastars where the whole humanised animals topic is actually being discussed and also used to cover racsim as a topic, to things like Sing and Kung Fu panda where everyone just simply is an animal cause it's animation marketed to kids. Then we have Ducktales. And well, Bigotry, discrimination and racism isn't the topic of this show, obviously. It's about adventures and familiar relationships and drama. WHICH IS GREAT. No question. But then you have Penumbra being weirded out at conscious ducks feeding non-conscious ducks, and the whole 4th wall break episode in season 3 showing us that at least some people were very much aware of the undiscussed implications a show with only animal people has. Even if it's supposed to be a silly kids show.

Feel free to comment under this and reblog, cause I would really wanna know what others people thoughts about this are and maybe discuss it a little bit.

[cheemscakecat]

Missing in Action 5 1/2

Chapter 5 1/2 Team Meat-ing Part 2

Young Spy prepares a meal for the whole team with Scout’s help. But despite the good food, he doesn’t seem super happy.

No cover art, but I’ve included pictures of each dish IRL

The first thing Scout noticed the next morning was the smell of Spy’s stupid cigarettes. He followed the smell into the kitchen, which was where he was going anyways. The new guy was there cleaning and gathering pots and pans, while smoking one of Spy’s cigs. Jeremy decided that someone might as well use them.

”What’s up?” He asked, sneaking over to the fridge to get the milk. Most days he just ate cereal, if it was there and nobody cooked breakfast. They hadn’t had much left after the admin mess, but there was ham and bacon unopened in the bottom drawer, and nobody got sick from it. He didn’t know if it was good that his thoughts drifted to miss Pauling. He wanted to believe that it was just concern over her new job, but he worried that he hadn’t moved on.

”I am going to cook ze food today. But there are many hens, so I need both kitchens.” Jeremy nodded and mindlessly took a bowl and his sugary chocolate cereal. It look him a second after pouring to notice new Spy staring. “What is that?”

”It’s cereal. Mostly just kids eat it for breakfast but I uh… get in a hurry.” Normally, Scout wouldn’t be embarrassed about not cooking most days, but this new guy was right here gatherin stuff for a big meal. He felt pretty lazy.

”I need to get food from ze other kitchen started. Come there after cereal.” And with that, Spy wandered off with an armful of clean pots.

When Scout opened the passageway door 10 minutes later, he found the Spy chopping vegetables. That was weird, there weren’t really any in the other fridge, even after a restock. “You go to town last night?” Spy turned around and shook his head. He opened another hidden door.

“Ze delivery people put ze new produces in this bread pocket so it would not rot.” Spy set down the knife and brought over a white paper box from the island. It was full of fancy looking bread that Jeremy wasn’t familiar with. “Have this pain au chocolat.” He said, plopping the dessert into his hand.

It was a real flaky bread with chocolate filling! Scout was surprised that it was still fresh, but quickly remembered that newbie woulda thrown out any moldy bread.

Things seemed to be going pretty well for a while. Jeremy offered to help Spy if he wanted it, and was tasked with putting the vegetables in each pot. He noticed a lot of butter. But he noticed that everything had grinned to a halt when they got to cutting the chickens.

New Spy was staring blankly at the fancy bird with a knife half raised in his hand. At first, Jeremy assumed he was just making up his mind on somethin, but he stayed like that for 10 minutes before he decided to speak up.

“You uh, alright man?” He asked. Spy blinked once and sighed. “Sorry, it’s… I wasn’t planning to do meals so soon after… after relocation.” He didn’t explain any further than that. But Scout got a very sudden feeling that there was much more going on.

“Well uh, I could try to help you. Cut the time in half, right?” Spy flinched for some reason before putting on a forced, close-lipped grin. “I think that would be best, thank you. I’m not feeling… fast right now.”

Spy got to work browning stuff in one of the pans. “Cut ze drumsticks and ze thighs off 2 hens.” Scout remembered watching Ma cut the turkey at thanksgiving and did his best. As far as he could tell it was decent, but he figured Spy might not agree. He glanced over from the bacon and veggies in the pan. “Did I… do it right?” He asked. “It does not have to be perfection. The bulk of ze meat is where we want.” Good.

“So, uh… what are we making right now?” Jeremy got the feelin he should keep things light. Something was botherin the new guy. “Coq au vin.” He snorted and spy blinked at him. He was almost convinced that it was because it sounded like his old man’s weird *** snort laugh. Oh wait, no. New guy wouldn’t know about that. “What is funny?”

”Oh, just sounded like an American word for… something.” Spy stirred for a while and made Scout believe he’d moved on. “Oh, is word for *****.” He wheezed like Ma and for some reason newbie looked even more surprised.

They prepped something called “chicken fricassee” which two more hens worth’a drums and thighs, then two pots of… um…

”Wait, what was it called?” “Poulet a la Moutarde Francaise.” “Uh….” “Mustard chicken.” Maybe there was a good reason for fancy names after all.

With the remainin four chickens, they prepped two to be roasted whole. Cut the thighs and drums off the others for “chicken chasseur” n that left the breasts for “chicken Provençal”. Scout watched new Spy take the bones and put them in a big metal thing.

“What are you gonna do with the bones?” “Chicken stock.” He answered, shoving them in the big freezer. Apparently some of the other freezer mystery tubs were stock or sauces.

—————————

Good lord, the base smelled magnificent. It took half the team just to make sure Solly didn’t go in the kitchen and mess up that cookin food. Thankfully Engineer didn’t have to keep Pyro out on account of his mask.

They knew Spy was French, they knew that but.. it was easy to forget the whole “food hub” thing when the smoking room wasn't for meals. Spy musta been cookin and eating in his secret kitchen, or the base woulda smelled like this sooner.

Demoman wasn’t much affected by the smell. It was nice to be sure, but he had gone on with his pure alcohol diet so long that food didn’t tempt him. But he noticed Sniper of all people pacing around all impatient like. He liked to live on the land, but even he weren’t immune to good cookin.

Heavy was glad that Spy had not gone to his house in Siberia. Not just because of Scout being ill, but because he wouldn’t have been happy with the food. There were many less spices in a place so far, and mother had to make them last. Normally he was content with his sandviches, but he could tell this meal would be a treat.

Medic locked Archimedes and the other doves in the medbay. They, like him, had no qualms about eating cooked bird. Archimedes might have possibly eaten a cooked dove if it were offered to him, but he was cute and the doctor was content with that.

Antoine wasn’t looking forward to dinner. It wasn’t doubt in his own abilities or the healthfulness of the food. He just.. he didn’t want to cook for a new team! On that Helicopter he told himself he’d be wise this time, not overly friendly and naive. But here he was cooking for a strange team without a proper mask to hide his face.

And he missed them. It was the same good food, but it wasn’t for them. They weren’t… here. Was he really about to do this so soon? During his failed relocation, with total strangers?

He pictured the desert Scout assisting him earlier that day. If he’d been alone, that good hen would have gone rancid from him standing useless at the counter. And it shouldn’t be like that. He shouldn’t be like that. Desert Scout seemed like a nice enough guy. Someone he would befriend if he got to stay, but that probably would not happen. But for now, it was nice knowing someone near his age who was kind.

This Scout reminded him of Merriam, actually. He missed her, even if she hated him forever. Of course she didn’t know the secret. She and Jeremy were safer that way. He debated calling her on the desert Spy’s phone but felt afraid it was tapped.

It had surprised him that the missing Spy was French actually. France was in Europe, and while not as pasty and weak to heat as the British, it was not a sweltering country. He took the nightmares over staying awake long in the weeks he spent in that cave. Better to conserve energy that way. The missing Spy had expensive tastes and probably did not much like heat himself. What possessed him to move to a desert team?

He may have been one of the bad spies. The ones who sell their teammates secrets. He knew they were out there, his old team warned him to speak with carefulness around other RED spies, not just BLU. He wouldn’t let that advice go to waste, especially if his family could be tracked.

—————————

New Spy laid out a really epic spread of food! Jeremy had to admit, he’d been skeptical of the meal gettin boring using the same veggies in so many fancy French dishes. But he was wrong. It all looked so good, and he wanted to taste everything!

There were really smooth yellow mashed potatoes and some kinda greens, and lots and lots of chicken! Spy wrapped some melon in fancy deli meat and put it on a cutting board with cheese, olives and more deli meat. There was a tray of colorful desserts and fancy breads like the one he ate at breakfast, too.

Engineer made sure to grab some extra dessert and watered down wine with Pyro’s plate, and loaded up his own with just about everything he and Spy could fit. Heavy had already told him they didn’t eat at the table, but at least Engie knew he hadn’t offended baby Spy.

Heavy was interested in the cheese platter, but skipped it because he knew his big hands would touch everyone else’s share by mistake. But he was pleased with the red sauced chicken meals and the roasted whole breast. He took a spiral bread from the edge of the dessert tray and it was very sweet and pleasantly delicate.

Medic enjoyed the mushroom based sauce on the mashed potatoes, it reminded him of Germany’s different gravies. The meat wrapped cantaloupe was surprisingly good, and even if the spinach was soft and unlike sauerkraut, the flavor was still very good. He made sure to grab an extra plain pastry to share with his birds later.

Spy hooked Demoman up wit scotch and some stronger wine instead of insisting that he eat. He appreciated it, even if the drink was too mild for him to get a buzz.

Soldier had never been a fancy civilized person. He preferred to sleep outside surrounded by raccoons, not in buildings that were too neat and riddled with rules. He was enjoying the food though. He hoped that Spy might make more for him and Zhanna sometime, because the only other place to get fancy people food was fancy people restaurants. And he could tell that she would feel just as itchy to leave as him in a place like that.

Sniper didn’t usually go for smaller white meat birds, preferring emu and other big Aussie bird meat, but the red sauces appealed to him. He liked the fancy desserts well enough, even if he didn’t know what the squishy stuff was… not pudding.. not frosting. It was good though. The mustardy chicken was good broken up and eaten with the green stuff, which he took to be polite.

Scout was having a blast! He never knew there were so many ways to cook chicken and make it taste different. And new Spy probably knew like seven more ways. French food had always seemed like a distant idea behind his stinking deadbeat father and his stuck up attitude. It always sounded snobby by proxy.

But maybe his dumb*** dad was used to good food like this, and that’s why he hated the fried chicken Scout bought. He had to admit, if he ate it after a bite of one of these dishes it would taste like cardboard. But that didn’t make it right to waste food like he did during the bread monster accident. Letting it fall on the floor and get gross… whatever, this wasn’t about him.

There was mustardy chicken that was really good with the green stuff and a plain “croissant”. The roasted chicken was lemony and had a bunch of green spices on it. The white sauce with mushrooms went super well with the good mashed potatoes. He ate pieces of cheese from the cutting board in between the heavier red sauced chicken. And even the melon thing he tried was good!

He got full faster than he usually did eating chicken. But then again, he usually just ate a bucket of fried drumsticks with no mashed potatoes or other stuff. It was kind of boring food, now that he thought about it. He smelled something like peanut butter on the dessert tray and decided it was worth trying. New Spy told him it was hazelnut flavored; he knew because he ate one too.

————————

The leftover food was put in the shared kitchen, except for the cheese board and some of the pastries, which Antoine took back to the other Spy’s kitchen. Then everyone went to bed. He was glad that everyone liked the food, especially since it meant they didn’t watch him too closely. The sound of Scout innocently cutting the raw chicken bones apart almost made him vomit earlier.

It was not so bad at dinner, but his stomach still churned looking at the food he wished he was serving to his old team. He ate the potatoes, roasted chicken and creamed spinach instead of having the same fun as the others. It all went down well enough, and when the desert Scout was unsure of what dessert he had eaten, he worked up the guts to taste one and tell him the flavor. He missed them. And he missed Merriam. It took him longer to fall asleep in the chair by the fire, even though he was just as full as the desert team who were dreaming in peace. For once, he did not have a nightmare.

Here’s what the meal would have looked like, more or less

Coq au Vin

Chicken Fricassee

Poulet a la Moutarde Francaise

Chicken Chasseur

Chicken Provençal

Roasted whole chicken

Charcuterie board

Mashed potatoes

Creamed Spinach because health [same]

The desserts

The hazelnut thing Scout ate.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #63

I went to the grocery store today! And this time, I actually got some pictures of the general structure and layout! Because I know you said you wanted to know what is an ordinary life.

I don't know if these exist in your world in the same way, so maybe this won't seem very ordinary to you. But it's ordinary where I live, so here you go:

Most places will have the entrance directly in the produce section. This is where we find all our fruits and vegetables. There are lots of pictures because there are lots of different kinds of food here. Some of them come pre-cut and pre-washed; this is very convenient, and also makes it a lot easier for disabled people to cook on their own:

I got a broccoli, some asparagus, and some tomatoes from here!

There's also typically a section that contains deli meats and cheeses. These come whole in plastic packages, and then they get sliced up on special machines on request. This stuff is usually for sandwiches and the like.

I didn't get anything from this section, but I wanted to show it to you anyway!

You have the other cheese sections, too, which are... not for sandwiches? I guess that's the best way I can explain it - usually the cheese is split up for that which is intended for sandwiches and that which is intended for other things. But I don't usually discriminate when it comes to cheese; these are my favorite sections of the grocery store whether they're for sandwiches or not!! Because I am a cheese goblin!! It has been written!! It is known!! Ahahaha~! 😄

(sadly, I didn't get anything from this section today. but you can tell it's my favorite section because I have more pictures of this one particular food than of anything else!! hahahaha! 🤣🤤)

Over this way, you have the prepared foods section, the raw fish and raw meat sections, and the rest of the aisles:

This is the fish section! I only get salmon from here, because almost everything else is either too expensive or it has too much mercury in it, or both! Swordfish, for example, is a fish that lots of people in my world really like, but it's ridiculously expensive, and it's got a ridiculous amount of mercury in it, too, so I avoid it. Mercury is not good for the bodies of living creatures!

I did get salmon from here today. My world has farmed salmon; people say that it's bad for you in other ways, but I know that wild salmon are often not sustainably fished, and farmed salmon is cheaper anyhow, and it's very important to have omega-3 fatty acids in your diet (especially if, like me, you came out of therapy today with a massive paradigm shift; your brain is gonna need that stuff in order to build new neural connections properly; maybe I'll talk about it tomorrow)!

This section is where they put all the custom cut, pre-seasoned, and extra fancy raw meat:

It's in this section that you'll find lamb, wagyu, bison, pricier cuts of beef, and pre-seasoned and pre-marinated meats.

The rest of the raw meat section contains more standardized cuts that haven't been seasoned. It's divided into "beef and sometimes lamb" (it's a real treat when they get whole lamb leg on the bone; I love to season and roast those and save the bone for broth!), pork, "turkey, chicken and chicken organs", and then "other organ meats, things for stock or bird feed, and things that are purchased relatively rarely" - think beef liver, suet, pig's feet, chicken's feet, and marrow bones for making soup stock. But they don't always have those things.

This is the "beef and sometimes lamb" section:

This is the pork section:

Here is the turkey, chicken, and chicken organs, and organ meats sections:

I got chicken leg quarters from here! I intend to make them tomorrow, if I still have energy after my tasks and I'm not in too much pain!

Near these sections, in the middle, is where all the pre-cooked or cured meats are - things like hotdogs, cooked sausages, whole ham, and bacon. Here's an example:

This is where they keep the milk and cream:

And here's where they keep breads and desserts:

I got a couple of surprises here, with you in mind! You'll see at the end! 😁

So far, I've only shown you the edges of the store. There are lots of aisles in the middle, which is where they keep non-perishable items, or items that aren't perishable until they're opened. Things like cereal, canned goods, dried goods, pasta, condiments, sugar, flour... stuff like that. The middle aisles contain lots of preserved or processed foods. Foods such as those aren't necessarily bad things, but it's generally important to make sure that processed foods don't make up your whole diet.

...Unfortunately, though, the reality of our world is that processed foods are generally a lot cheaper, so for most people, it's really all they can afford. I'm very lucky that I can get things like fresh fruits, fresh vegetables, and fresh fish. I remember when I was younger, and we could usually only get processed foods, meat, dairy, and bread.

In any case, here's the breakfast aisle:

You can find things here like cereal, oats, pancake mix, tea, coffee, honey, syrup, and stuff that people where I live generally like to eat for breakfast.

This is the honey and syrup section.

I got honey from here because we were out.

Next to it is the tea section:

I didn't get anything from here, but I decided to show it to you anyway because the colorful boxes are kinda pretty!

J was with me, and he decided to snag this picture of me taking pictures for you, for some reason! Hahaha!

Anyhoot! We got home and put everything away! I guess it's time for me to show you the surprises I got! I don't know what you like for dessert, but it's hard to go wrong with things like chocolate and raspberries, I think!

This one is a chocolate cheesecake with purple raspberry frosting and fresh raspberries on top!

This one is a raspberry mascarpone tart thing!

And this one is a chocolate truffle tart thing!

...And... I know I can't give these to you. But I think you would like them if I could. If nothing else, please know that there are people in this world who would get tasty snacks for you just because they think you might like them.

Thank you for coming on this adventure with me. I know that a grocery store is probably just an ordinary thing, but you've indicated before that you just want ordinary things, and... even ordinary things can be turned into full adventures if you're carrying enough curiosity, joy, excitement, and love inside your mind. Even if you go to the same place lots of times, there is still always something new and beautiful to discover, if only you look closely at everything with fresh eyes.

You are loved because I love you. And lots of other people do, too. So don't do anything stupid to get yourself killed, got it? We need you here. We need to see you heal. We need you to be okay in the end. Please. Because there's still so much you haven't seen. There are still so many delightful and wonderful and beautiful things that you haven't experienced. Don't go around thinking like pain and misery are the only things that life can offer you. You're not done yet.

I'll write again tomorrow, so please keep yourself safe.

Your friend, Lumine

[popjunkie42]

Ho ho ho! ❄️

Santa is here to deliver to you the first day of your ‘Feysand Festive Cheer Advent Calendar’! ✨

Today your advent treat is a chapter title reveal for all four chapters of your fic 📖

https://pin.it/2B7JKEQ

Please excuse the very obvious typo - the spellcheck elf did not have his glasses on today, and did not discover it until it was too late 🤪

Question of the day - What is your favourite thing to eat/drink at Christmas time? Santa is partial to a gingerbread or two!

Anyway I hope you have a lovely day and I will speak to you again tomorrow for more festive Feysand fun! 🎄💖

Ahhh this is lovely! You are too good to me Santa, you get all the gold stars and holiday cheer. I am so excited for your story!!

I am a fan of all the holiday spreads. I have a friend who is an excellent baker and every year request Christmas cookies and her chocolate-peppermint bark. And this year my brother is coming to visit, and we might go a bit decadent with our holiday meal and get crab legs instead of a traditional turkey or ham.

I hope you have some exciting holiday plans too!!

[deathcrusader]

Y'know, I was thinking, why don't we just eat homeless people. Think about it, It would clear the streets of their kind and solve hunger problems. Plus, it could add a new hunting season as I doubt the FDA will allow human meat to be sold in public places. Now, when would the Hunting Season be, not a clue it would have to be when homeless people are out the most statistically, but I would assume that would be during the Holidays so between October and December. This could also allow new main courses for Christmas and Thanksgiving dinner other than Turkey or Ham.

Anyways, here is a picture of a kitten

[welldonebeca]

Miss, PhD (XXVI/Final)

WC: 2.4k words Warnings: So much fluff. College AU. Hurt/Comfort. Christmas. Family fluff. A/N: The End.

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and helps a lot while I go through these hard times.

Masterlist

Steve kept his eyes right on you as you dried yourself, standing completely naked in front of him with your curls half-heartedly pined up as you left your shower.

He wasn’t surprised to know that your family wore matching pyjamas for Christmas. When he was a kid at home, his own family had their own set, and he had even spent some time growing into his own onesie when he was a teen, not wanting to ask his parents for something that fit him better - these days, though, he was a tad too big for them. Personally, he expected it to be something conventional, but considering your family wasn’t that conventional, he shouldn’t be surprised he was met with not one, but two silk pyjama sets. There were pants and a long sleeved shirt for cold nights - and probably this night - and a sleeveless shirt and shorts, probably for summer, both in deep green and red. Very Christmas-ish.

“No long sleeves for you?” he asked, realising you were picking up a thin-strapped top.

You shook your head, putting on your bralette.

“The back,” you reminded him. “It’s… weird.”

He frowned a little.

“Weird?” he asked.

You stopped, pouting a little as you thought about your words.

“It’s warm,” you told him, at last. “In the bad way. The texture way.”

He nodded along, resigning to not quite understanding the feeling.

“Okay.”

You smiled a little and put on your panties and pants, and he pulled you close when you walked to his side, where you had left your robe.

“So soft,” he hummed, holding you close, and kissed your stomach gently over the fabric. “You should wear silk more often.”

You giggled a little, putting your hands on his shoulders.

“I’ll be sure to get some silk stuff,” you brushed his hair with your fingers. “You want to fuck me in silk?”

He let out a mixture of a snort and a laugh.

“Under your parents’ roof?” he asked, blushing a little. “No, I don’t think so.”

You laughed, sitting on his lap, straddling him.

“Are you afraid of Happy and Jarvis hearing us from across the hall?” you teased him, kissing his jaw.

Steve hummed along, enjoying the sensual affection, but not the image in his head.

“Please, don’t make me imagine that,” he closed his eyes.

You giggled.

“I’ll let you know, Mister Rogers,” you moved back, raising your chin. “That my room is soundproof. The whole house is.”

He raised his eyebrows, a little surprised.

“Really?” he asked.

“I can have a band recording rock music here and no one would hear anything as long as the door was closed,” you assured him.

Steve chuckled, holding your hips and rubbing his nose on yours, teasing your lips with a not-kiss.

"Why would you want to have a rock band recording here?" he teased you. "I can think of a lot of things that are way more entertaining to do on this bed."

You giggled, pecking his lips.

“After Christmas Eve,” you told him. “We can test how soundproof the walls are.”

He chuckled, relaxing in your arms., and you pecked his lips.

“Alright,” you sighed, stepping back. “Time to go down, come on.”

You wrapped your robe around yourself and put on your slippers, waiting for him to follow along before opening the door, and you two walked down to the living room, where everyone already was waiting, and you were all quick to start eating.

There was no turkey or ham or anything conventional. No. You were eating seafood and sushi.

Very good seafood and sushi, but it was different anyway.

“Seafood?” he asked you just as you two ate a shared plate of sashimi, with you holding it while seated right on your lap.

You chewed your bit, offering him one too, and he ate along.

Any food you ever introduced to him was so damn good.

“Christmas means seafood,” you told him, shrugging. “It’s our little tradition.”

“Always?” he asked.

“You wanna hear the story about that?” your father offered.

He looked over at him, and your parents were seated together the same way you two were, and your mother was drinking something from a big mug - which was a little weird, cause there weren’t any soups around - as your father rested a plate of sushi over her thighs.

“Yes, sir,” he confirmed, and you shifted to his other side, so you could look at him.

You rested your head on his shoulder, and Tony exchanged a little look with your mother.

“I was 20 when I had Y/N, I think you know that,” he offered, and Steve nodded.

Yes, he knew he had been a relatively young parent.

“Well, her first Christmas was very normal,” he explained. “But when she was a little over one and I was 21, I lost my parents.”

Pepper kissed his temple affectionately in a bit of comfort.

“I always had Y/N for Christmas, it was my agreement with…” he stopped himself, looking a you, and pressed his lips together for a second before continuing. “Well, it was the agreement back then. Christmas was mine.”

You moved a little on Steve’s lap, looking uncomfortable, and he caressed your knee gently. Your biological mother was a very sore subject.

“So the day came, and… well, we had gifts for her, Happy had sent her gifts, all of the friends of the family had, and Jarvis was staying with us for a bit like he has since… forever, I guess,” he continued.

On the couch in front of the two of you, Jarvis a glass of scotch in confirmation and agreement..

"And I didn’t have anything up," your father told him. "No tree, no decorations… especially no Christmas food."

Jarvis chuckled.

“He bought sushi. For a baby!” he pointed in your direction.

The room erupted in little laughs, and Steve squeezed you close. While imaginig you enjoyed sushi since you were little wasn’t surfing, maybe he didn’t quite imagine a toddler of just over a full year of age eating it.

“I was careful,” your father argued. “And she liked it. It’s her favourite food.”

Steve looked at you, and you shrugged.

“It has always been my favourite food,” you confirmed. “You’re gonna have to pry it from my hands if I’m ever pregnant.”

He chuckled. Well, the two of you were still in the talks about that.

“So the next year I did again,” Tony continued. “And then the next year. And by the time Pepper came around, it was already a family thing. A Stark tradition, if I may.”

“It’s also a Stark tradition to have all Stark couples all over one another during Christmas,” Happy remarked, walking to the food table to get himself food too. “And I see you are already getting used to that, Rogers.”

Steve flushed a little and you just giggled, kissing his cheek.

“You are an honorary Stark,” you teased him.

“Don’t forget the day you gave her wasabi by accident,” Jarvis added, and Steve turned to him, surprised.

You laughed, and your father blushed.

“It was once,” he tried to defend himself.

“She was three!” Jarvis argued. “It took her a whole week to trust him to feed her again.”

You giggled more, and your godfather shook his head.

“I’m sure we have pictures of that day. When she finally stopped crying, Y/N spent the rest of the night shoving food into her mouth with her hands, she was a mess.”

When Steve turned back to you, you were just eating a piece with your bare hands just as well, and rolled your eyes.

“I’m not messy anymore,” you reminded him.

Steve laughed and raised his body to reach your face, kissing your cheeks all over.

"Yes, you are, honey," your mother corrected you. "I've seen your workspace. You are the only one who understands whatever order that has."

"Mum!" you whined.

Steve chuckled.

"Try her house," he spread kisses in your cheek. "I don't know how she finds things there."

Your mother shook her head.

"It's the Stark ADHD gene," she told him. "Get used to it. We have to work around their systems and not the reverse."

"It's a good system," your father insisted. "Things are where you are going to use them."

"And if you take them out of there..." you tried to add.

"You forget!" he finished your sentence along with your mother.

Everyone laughed, even you and Tony - though you were both shaking your heads - and Happy sat down on the couch with Jarvis.

“No, no,” your father raised a hand. “You all don’t get to mock us! Especially when I, the daddy, got all the presents.”

Pepper scoffed.

“No, you didn’t,” she corrected him. “I picked them, and you said ‘yes, dear’.”

“Which is basically the same,” he shrugged. “Come on, let’s get to the gifts. Who wants to start?”

“Oh, stop that,” Pepper stood up. “Everyone, go get everything. Pink is from me, red with robots is from Tony, Steve is blue, Jarvis is yellow, and… Y/N and Happy, remind me?”

“Black with the rainbows,” you stood up.

“The same package it came when Amazon delivered to my house,” Happy said simply.

You chuckled and Steve did the same, just reaching for the presents, and he checked the labels, passion yours along to you and taking what was supposedly his.

“Here,” you passed him a yellow gift.

Steve opened them one by one. Jarvis got him a hydro flask, Happy bought him a S’mores roaster, you got him a new leather wallet - which looked very sophisticated, and was very useful as he kept forgetting to replace his actual wallet, and it was pretty much falling apart - and Pepper got him a bottle of wine.

“It’s a Château Corton Grancey,” she told him. “Y/N said you like your red on the acidic side.”

He blinked a little, nodding. Those were… a lot of words for wine.

“Thank you,” he smiled at her.

“Alright, thank her later,” Tony interrupted him. “Get mine now. I’ve been waiting for you to open it since we started opening the gifts.”

Steve shook his head, but picked the small box, and you sat by his side, waiting as Happy got up to his feet.

“What is that?” you turned to your father.

“Let him open it, sweetheart,” Tony waved a hand. “We all got the chance of being surprised. Let Steve have his own too.”

The room fell into a little bit of silence as he opened his gift, and Steve frowned at the branded box.

“Is this…” he mumbled.

He opened the box and his eyes widened.

Fuck. No.

“Is this a Rolex?”

Your father was giving him a Rolex?!

“Welcome to the family, pal,” he patted him on the shoulder. “Merry Christmas.”

Steve opened and closed his mouth.

A Rolex?!

“This is-” he stuttered, turning to your father. “I… I can’t-”

“You can,” Tony interrupted him. “And I’m glad you liked it.”

He opened and closed his mouth, and you squeezed his hand.

“It’s a Rolex,” he hissed.

And a very beautiful Rolex too.

But a fucking Rolex?! It was so much money for a single watch, and he didn’t even know where he could wear that.

“Thank you,” he looked at him, not knowing what else to say. “Thank you very much. I’ll… I’ll wear when I find the opportunity.”

That was probably the biggest gift he had ever gotten in his life.

“Hey, what is this,” Happy asked, bringing the packed painting to them.

Oh. Your gift.

He had forgotten your gift.

Steve turned to you quickly.

“It’s your Christmas gift,” he told you. “I… uh… I made it.”

Your face softened slowly and was completely unreadable as you stared at him.

“You made it?” you asked.

Steve nodded, and stood up, taking the painting from Happy, looking at you nervously.

What if you hated it?

What if it sucked?

Maybe-

“Open it,” your father told you. “Go on, honey. Lets us see it.”

You stood up, looking at Steve with hesitant eyes before moving your hands to rip the paper, and he lied the box down, so you could open it safely.

You opened the box and took off the protective layer, and your shoulder fell.

It was a painting inspired by the picture he took of you on your bed, with a different back, with you laying on a garden of flowers, with your curls spread under you and a happy look on your face, the little smile on your lips just big enough to show it.

“It’s beautiful,” your father exclaimed. “Steve, you made this? I didn’t know you were so talented.”

“It’s gorgeous,” your mother put her hand over her lips.

He had seen that look on your face many times. It was a mixture of peace and bliss. The look you gave him when you were comfortable together, cuddling after a long day or just eaten. He had seen it when you sat on his lap just minutes ago, eating with your family and just being all together.

“Y/N,” he turned to you. “What do you think?”

Your lips trembled, and Steve’s eyes widened when you started crying in your spot straight-up sobbing, and he was quick to move to you.

“Sweetheart,” he reached for you.

You grabbed his hand, squeezing it tight, and moved your mouth, trying to babble.

“Steve,” you gasped.

He watched your face, and you just grabbed him, squeezing him close, hugging him and sobbing into his shirt.

Your mother reached for you, rubbing your back gently.

“Y/N?” he asked.

You sobbed more into his neck, and Steve waited, looking at your face when you pulled away, sniffing and shaking a little.

He turned to your side when Happy came to you, and you took the glass of water from his hand, drinking it.

He watched your face, and he squeezed your hand as you did, and you turned to him.

“All that I’ve ever wanted,” you looked at your face, face still covered in tears as they streamed down your cheeks. “In my whole life was to be loved by someone who didn’t have to love me.”

Steve felt his heard swelling in his chest, tearing up just as well, and reached for your face, drying your tears, and you took his hand, kissing his palm.

“Steve, I never thought I could be this happy,” you sniffed.

He rested his forehead on yours and you put your hands on his face, cradling his jaw.

“I love you,” you told him. “I love you so much.”

Steve gave your lips a gentle peck.

“I know,” he assured you. “You show it to me every day.”

You cried a little more, and he rubbed his nose on yours.

“I love you,” he affirmed. “So much.”

“I know,” you kissed his palm. “I know.”

Steve caressed your cheeks, feeling more than embraced by your reaction.

Maybe you weren’t exactly a woman of words - you spent all your letters with your calculations - but he certainly knew he could count on you.

Whatever happened, he knew he would be safe and happy, and that he would have you.

. .

"Miss, PhD" was posted on my Patreon back on January! To have early access to all of my works, subscribe to my page! It's just $2 a month!

. . .

Forever Tags: @emoryhemsworth​​​ @amythyststorm33​​​ @shaelyn102​​​ @yknott81​​​ ​​ @maximofftrash​​​ @kgbrenner​​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112​​​ @magpiegirl80​​​ @mogaruke ​​​ @shadowhuntersseries​​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112​​​ @megasimpleplan4ever​​​ @deemoriarty ​​​ @05spn18​​​ @malindacath​​​ @kdcollinsauthor​​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112​​​ @widowsfics​​​ @frozenhuntress67​​​ @averyrogers83​​​ @notyourtypicalrose​​​ @nerdypinupcrystal​ @giruvega Marvel forever tags: @its-daydreamer23​​​ ​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112​​​ @tayrae515imagines​​​? @indecisiondecisions​​​? @afanofmanystuffs​​​? @patzammit​​​? @thevanishedillusion​​​? @widowsfics​​​? @alexisshoto​​​ @princess-evans-addict​​​ @dreams-of-feysand​​​ @xoxabs88xox​​​ @dragonqueen0606​ @izbelross @isabelle-faith Miss PhD: @cosmic-darikano

[mariacallous]

Today was our office/team holiday celebration (I brought a party tray with ham and turkey and cheese and crackers) and I and some other staff set it up and helped do some more coordinating and planning. The overall team director was AMAZED at everything (which I predicted) and brought a small amount of homemade cookies. It went okay but I wasn't too much in the mood to socialize and I helped clean up (after said director felt like we should just keep stuff out for another hour or so in case anyone wanted it and then came back later to go "so where are we at with things?" to which the response was "We're done").

I had several meetings which all went well, at least for my part specifically. Tomorrow is the new staff event I was asked to coordinate and organize - my supervisor wanted to put some time on today to "plan activities" for the event but that never happened, and I'm not sad that it failed to happen because I hate doing icebreakers and shit like that anyway. For tomorrow I picked up chips and dip, plus some sodas (3 for $4 at walgreens!) and napkins cups and plates and utentils just in case because I don't trust my supervisor or the overall team director tbh (moreso the latter than the former) and we had lots of stuff leftover to use anyway which was good.

I left work a little early because I was just done and didn't want to be there any longer but also because I needed to get an earbud replacement and also check some stuff out. I went to Union Square both for the Barnes and Noble (no ukrainian language books there save for a picture dictionary btw, but their quilted velvet tote bags are VERY nice and I couldn't resist, plus some more books on Russia/Ukraine and a new one about the IRA's fight against Margaret Thatcher) and then I checked out the holiday market in Union Square which was nice but too crowded and I hit my limit with crowds and tight spaces very quickly (so no empanadas or raclette or anything for this moi) before finally getting on the subway and heading home.

Some stuff my sister and family sent me got held at the post office so I have to go either tomorrow or Friday morning to get it, which is not great.

[fuck-customers]

So I got out of retail and jumped right into hospitality, which is only a slight upgrade tbh. Anyway, I am a housekeeper for a property management company that has a bunch of vacation rentals and the sheer nastiness of some people is insane. And it's not even like crazy stuff most of the time, it's "damn bitch, you live like this?" kinda stuff.

Like, 5 trash bags full of rotting food just sitting in the kitchen? That shit has been accumulating and people just walked around it and left it there? My brother in Christ you walked past the dumpster to get into your car and leave, you could have taken it. It fucking stinks in here now because you've lived with rotten garbage for a week. At one unit I cleaned I threw away a WHOLE ass Thanksgiving turkey someone let rot in the fridge. It was like two days from new years. There was also a whole spiral ham. That they left rot... not only is the waste of food infuriating, but have you ever carried 20lbs of rotten meat down 4 flights of stairs in blizzard? That shit sucks. And the next guests were already there (because of the blizzard) and were already moving in while we cleaned up after the last guest.

And people putting wet towels in the bed?? Why?? It's a thing I deal with every day! I appreciate when people gather all their dirty towels, it is helpful. But for the love of good don't put your wet and smelly towels on the bed. It stains the mattress and makes it stink if we don't get there early enough. Those wet towels can sit there up to a week. Also, guests feel the need to go through the closets and just take and use things without thinking about it, which is fine most of the time because you paid for your stay and whatever. However, one guest found one of those mattress in a box things that an owner left behind and opened it and slept in the floor with it. Did you expect the housekeepers to fold the mattress back up and put in the box?? There is literally an extra queen sized mattress that we have to get rid of now because there is nowhere to put it. Literally a brand new mattress.

Also, FYI for anyone who rents a vacation house/condo, aim for one with access to in unit laundry because guess what y'all, we don't wash the comforters/duvets. We are timed in our cleans and we don't HAVE TIME to wash the laundry, we just bring new towels and linens and take the old ones, like a hotel. The crusty blankets stay until they get so bad that management feels like it's time to spring for a new one. So those wet towels someone dumped in that bed? Someone else is sleeping in that blanket tonight. Also, in like 2020 when I started, it was fucking crazy because soooo many people went on "vacation" because they could just work remotely so COVID was fucking everywhere and we couldn't wash the fucking blankets and some rentals STILL have those blankets.

So if anyone goes on vacation, please for your own safety wash your blankets before you use them. And please be considerate of the people who will be staying there after you and don't be nasty.

[ladyofriverrun]

Christmas Tag Game

It's Festivus for the rest of us so grab your Chanukah bush, your mistletoe, your pagan ritual or whatever brings you joy and come gather round the fire and celebrate your pocket friends.

Tagged by: @svetlanayevgenivna

Favorite nickname you’ve ever been given? I haven't really been given many because my name is short anyway. But I get called Lani by very close family. And it's what I call myself to my cats like 'come to your Lani'.

Where are you located? Manchester. The UK one not the US one.

What season is it where you are now? It shall be winter on the 22nd so we're in the last dregs of Autumn.

Favourite tradition this time of year? Watching Tailor of Gloucester at night on the 24th, followed by The Snowman.

Favourite holiday food? The gingerbread stuffing I make.

Mulled wine, eggnog or hot apple cider? I don't drink anymore since an illness made me severely allergic to a few preservatives in alcohol. I don't want to risk the roulette of which ones (it's terrifying when it happens) so I just avoid all of it now and drink non-alcoholic alternatives. But even if I did drink, it would still be 'none of the above'. I used to love a glass of sherry at yuletide, because my mum always gave me a small glass on when I was little, and it just tastes of the season. But they don't even make that particular sherry anymore!

Turkey, Ham or Nut Roast (Or Tofurkey?)? Quorn roast. Cooked with a really freaking fragrant and delicious all-spice gravy (it has a huge list of flavours in it but they just all hum together).

Would you rather spend the December holidays in: A cabin in the woods surrounded by snow, or a house on the beach with sun and sand? Cabin in the woods. It's December and I demand snow! Even though I prefer hot weather in general, there are just certain times when only the cold will do.

Are you pro-snow or anti-snow? Pro. I find it very magical and it always makes everywhere white and glistening. Plus there was that one year where everyone got a whole extra week off because it snowed so heavily that the whole country had to sort of temporarily pause.

Have you ever built a snowman? I built a snow witch with my mum when I was 11 (she had a little witch hat on, a broom, and was surrounded by these little garden ornaments shaped like hares) and then made a giant one with a friend when I was 22 in the middle this huge place called Heaton Park.

Skiing or Snowboarding? I'm a former figure skater, so i have to say ice skating despite the fact it's not an option.

Do you decorate for the holidays? Yes. It's all very yule based though, as we celebrate Solstice, not Christmas.

Favourite holiday movie? Hogfather and Arthur Christmas. I also cannot have the season without watching the midwinter special from CAOS.

Favourite holiday fanfic? I don’t have one.

If you were to star in a Hallmark movie, who would be your love interest? No doubt it would be someone wearing plaid. Who owns some kind of dying business...

Tagging: @indigoraysoflight @outragedmermaid @ness029 and anyone else who wants to!

[ace-of-d1am0nds]

tag game wednesday!!!

ty for the tag @energievie

Favourite nickname you’ve ever been given:  my best friend calls me petunia (gender neutral). couldn't tell u why. she just does

Where are you located? currently south florida but there's a lot of movement happening this month

What season is it where you are now? winter technically but its like 70 degrees here. just left actual winter tho

Favourite tradition this time of year:  lighting hannukah candles!

Favourite holiday food: my mom's latke's

Mulled wine, eggnog or hot apple cider? never tried any of those

Turkey, Ham or Nut Roast (Or Tofurkey?)? if i had to choose turkey i guess

Would you rather spend the December holidays in:  A cabin in the woods surrounded by snow, or a house on the beach with sun and sand? cabin in the snow i love snow even though i didn't grow up in it

Are you pro-snow or anti-snow? pro! love snow

Have you ever built a snowman? unfortunately no. wanna tho

Skiing or Snowboarding? ive been skiing like 3 times but i do not remember how

Do you decorate for the holidays? we leave the menorah out during hannukah

Favourite holiday movie? wrong holiday but prince of egypt

Favourite holiday fanfic? currently reading none the wiser and they have a little holiday moment

If you were to star in a Hallmark movie, who would be your love interest? Where would it take place? either 90s wynonna ryder or kristen stewart but specifically from charlies angels (2019)

anyways im tagging @m4ndysk4nkovich @callivich @sweetbee78 and @juliakayyy

bro idk who to tag i dont have that many mutuals