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#anyway yes I am capable of posting more than one fic in a week
niko-jpeg · 5 months
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Have you ever wanted an evil cartoon hedgehog god to accidentally strand himself in your dimension, leaving you to help him back home? Have you ever wondered what a “Mephiles the Dork” would look like? Do you like silly plotless fics? Well then I have the story for you! Returning to my roots with 2nd person and everything. Enjoy <33
(Ideas borrowed from @rabbitsonthemoon tee hee)
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surplus-of-sarcasm · 2 years
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#22
Edit: I completely forgot to tag @thepenultimateword and @mirohtron for helping me with this fic. Sorryyyy, I was sleep-deprived ughh.
Yes yes, Lamy has not posted in so long. Homework and tests my belovedddddds/s. Also, I am tired, so this is what it is. Sue me, I dare you.
TW: Restraints, blood, murder, gun, knife, bullets, references to difficult past experiences, drugging mention, violence, bruises (I swear it's not that awful) and very flirty. not in any way smutty, but it's probably the flirtiest thing I've ever written.
"Well, isn't this just dreadfully romantic," Villain breathes out through gritted teeth, baring them in a sardonic sneer.
Hero twists in her restraints, a useless attempt to escape the too-tight ropes. "I'm not following," she snaps half-heartedly.
"I mean, you and I, so awfully close to each other. There's literally no space between us." He lets his voice drop down to a whisper, tone half-annoyed, half-playful. Teasing.
"That's because we're tied up together, genius," she huffs out.
"You're being boring again," the villain croons in an irritating sing-song voice.
"I'm only 'boring' because you are," the crime-fighter counters, unintentionally letting a laugh make its way into her tone.
This was her husband's miserable attempt at striking up a conversation after three weeks of actively ignoring each other. Or maybe he could've been attempting to ease the tension of being locked up, practically paralysed in Supervillain's lair, or trying to kill some time.
Still, not an apology.
He presses his back somehow even closer to hers, and she wishes she could suppress the heat radiating from her face, spreading through the rest of her body like wildfire, but at least he couldn't see the flushed, red complexion. She knows he'd enjoy that, even more than usual. He'd be so satisfied with himself, the jerk, that he'd still managed to illicit such a reaction from her, even when she was beyond pissed at him.
"Relax, will you? The fidgeting makes the ropes even tighter, and I'm already sore enough," he half-whines.
Letting out an annoyed huff, she rolls her eyes. "You moved first."
He laughs, and she hates how it makes her heart hammer erratically in her chest. "The normal amount. You, on the other hand, were squirming."
She doesn't like that tone, something akin to a melange of honey and silk, even if it was meant to annoy her. It could enchant you into a dazed silence, making you forget whatever it is you were trying to focus on. Her mind does not hesitate for even a moment to remind her of the first time she heard him talk like that, her face pressed into his chest.
"I'm addicted to your voice," she'd breathed out foolishly, and he'd pressed a passionate kiss to her cheekbone, laughing at her flustered blush.
"Couldn't the confinement have been solitary?" she interjects irritably, trying to throw in as much bite in her tone as she can muster.
He laughs again, soft and musical and breathtaking.
"Practically speaking, this isn't in your favour. It's cold, this helps conserve body heat." She can literally hear the smug grin in his words.
She lets out a strangled cry, making him snort. "However annoying you may think I am, don't forget that you agreed to marry me, Hero." He leans back, as far as the ropes let him, giving her leg a playful kick. A pathetic one though, as the fashion in which they were tied up left barely any room for breathing.
She lets out a dejected sigh. "I've been told I need to learn to have more patience, so I signed up for a life-long course. Anyway, how about you help come up with any suggestions to find a way out of this mess, or is being an insufferable prick all you're capable of?"
Harsh and not true, but he absolutely deserved it.
Before he can come up with any snarky replies, the door to their cell opens abruptly, letting in a sterile, white light, an uncomfortably blinding contrast to the dim, flickering light bulb that illuminated the tiny room. Any semblance of a joyful atmosphere is destroyed as the distinct clack of Supervillain's shoes rings in the couple's ears.
"Well, Other Villain wasn't wrong, this week's catch is rather appealing. A traitor and his little pet," they sneer coldly.
The muscles in Villain's face tighten ever so slightly as he clenches his jaw, gaze stone-hard. "The hell do you want?" he drawls coldly.
Supervillain lets out a mocking snort. "Information about the hero agency. What, you think there's more value to you than that?"
"He doesn't know anything, and I am not divulging," Hero answers, in a tone that leaves no room for further discussion.
That is, if her words were for anyone but Supervillain. The master criminal in question steps forward, the icy grin playing on their lips becoming a fraction more sinister. "Oh, but are you so blissfully ignorant of what I do to little rats like you that insist on being killjoys? I break them. That's what you do when a toy is no longer being fun. Didn't care to enlighten her, Villain?"
A shiver runs up Hero's spine at the disgusting analogy, but Villain just grits his teeth and gives his old superior a death glare. "She knows. But let's get this over with. She won't talk, so whatever sick, twisted torture you've got planned, take me, and leave her out of it."
"Have you lost your mind? There's no way in he-"
"Shut up and let me handle this," the villain snarls, cutting her off. "So you called me a traitor? Don't you think you should've noticed earlier? Or are you really as much of a fool as you look?" he croons, letting a taunting smirk find its way onto his lips.
Hero understands exactly what her husband was planning, but she wouldn't let him willingly throw himself to the wolves like a bloody piece of meat. Stubborn fool.
Before she can react though, Supervillain's hand quickly reaches for the glinting knife on their belt. They may have been intelligent, cold, calculating, scheming. But all of that was simply outweighed by a fragile ego, always in need of inflation. Their fatal flaw, if you will. They slice through the restraints, letting out a downright animalistic growl as they pull Villain forward by the hair.
Wriggling out of their grasp, the criminal's fingers claw at the supervillain's throat, only for them to slam their boot into his already bruised abdomen, warranting a soft whine to escape his throat and a filthy curse at Supervillain to fall from his lips.
Meanwhile, Hero finally manages to escape her bonds, having them loosened just a little when the man next to her had been cut free.
Two against one were better odds. Only if you ignored that the duo's muscles were completely cramped from being restrained in the same position for days, making movement painful, and they were covered in bruises. Not to mention half-starved, and their throats were parched with thirst. Weaponless against goddamn Supervillain of all people. What comforting thoughts.
Hero wastes no time in slamming them against the wall and bringing her fist to collide with the evil-doer's face, lining their cheekbone with purple bruises. Supervillain more than returns the favour, knuckles digging into a barely healing cut in her side, the sheer force of it knocking her down with a sharp hiss.
Villain's former boss had superhuman strength at their disposal, making them more than a match for their weary and battered enemies, a power-suppressing drug having been injected into their veins every single day of their stay here. That leads to the battle with Supervillain being a torturous stalemate of futile attempts at attacks on them.
"Enough pathetic, little games," Supervillain hisses, voice eerily serpentine They pull out a gun off their belt, training it on Villain's head. . .
Hero didn't know when the motion happened, when her body had suddenly moved, half-leaping into the air as the bullet tore viciously into her side. It was nothing, if not instinctual.
Villain doesn't hesitate. Fueled by an adrenaline rush and the all-consuming fury of wanting to avenge his lover, he throws himself on top of Supervillain, pinning them against the ground, prying the gun from their fingers, only moving away to empty the weapon's contents onto the master criminal, letting out a savage growl in the process.
Stepping away from the now completely bloodied corpse of Supervillain, he rushes over to his spouse, blood seeping out from the gash in her side, staining the floor a deep crimson. "Hero?" he whispers softly, voice breaking, eyes threatening to prick with tears.
"I'm fine, the bullet went straight through," she attests, as he scoops her up against his chest.
"I know how you feel about killing, bu-"
"Stop right there. I was going to tell you that I forgive you and that I've never been more in love with you. That git needed to die."
He sighs with relief, laughing in spite of himself as he races outside the door, conveniently left ajar, somehow managing to make his way to their shared residence.
*
He shrugs his shirt off, not even bothering to hide the terribly self-satisfied grin playing on his lips at just how rapidly it turns her face a bright red.
How embarrassingly pathetic.
"Don't think it's just the blood loss that's making you breathless, huh?" he purrs.
He was damningly stunning, and he knew it. It took little effort to leave her tongue-tied and dazed. His mere voice alone was enough to seduce her.
When she doesn't answer, his expression softens. "Let's get you stitched up." Tenderly, he lifts the now blood-soaked piece of cloth off of the wound in her side, wincing at the sight of the dull, bloodied laceration. He presses alcohol wipes to the gash, Hero letting out a sharp hiss.
Villain brings the needle close to her skin, watching as she bit down on her lips and closed her eyes. "Hey hey, relax. Eyes on me, sweetheart. It'll be fast, I promise." His free hand flits over to her shoulder, rubbing circles into it with his thumb, stopping only when he feels her breathing slow. It's strange how the same hands that beat enemies to a bloody pulp and pulled triggers on guns with no remorse could be so gentle, as though Hero was something so delicate.
"And besides, I graduated med school with flying colours," he quips, earning a soft, but strained laugh from the heroine. Carefully, he works on the stitches, whispering soft nothings to soothe her. Hero had seen worse. So much worse. But he was going to try his hardest to make sure she went through the least pain possible.
Hero deserved the world.
When he's done, she leans in closer, kissing his jawline and keeping an arm wrapped around his neck. She revels in the way he freezes up, unable to move a muscle, staring into her eyes in a look that practically screamed lost kitten.
"What is this?" He raises one eyebrow, confused.
It was her turn to smirk at his state. "Revenge, handsome," she murmurs. Her hand now reaches for his hair, running her fingers through the soft locks, and she takes in the sight of Villain short circuiting, words catching in her lover's throat, and those gorgeous, midnight blue eyes of his going wide as he lets out a nervous laugh.
The criminal was a good flirt, but much more fun when flustered, face getting warm, dark tan skin mercifully concealing what would've been a deep crimson in his cheeks.
"I'm sorry," he blurts out suddenly, voice small and hesitant. So unlike that cocky persona of his that he'd adopted mere moments ago.
Hero flashes him a dirt-eating grin. "What did you say? I couldn't quite catch that, love." Liar.
"I'm sorry!" he interjects, almost irritably, but he finds himself smiling in between the words. "For not apologising when I should've, for being so stubborn for so damn long. That stuff."
His wife's expression softens, and she pulls him into a warm embrace. "I missed you," she whispers, voice light and gentle against the shell of his ear.
"Me too," he feels his touch-starved form melt into the touch, a terrible craving finally sated.
A hot bath and some more bandages later, Hero and Villain find themselves cuddling together on the couch, giggling at a well-loved action comedy movie.
As long as they were together, as long as they were both alive, then nothing on this earth could stop them, almost as though they were two forces of nature, created to always exist as one.
✨️Le Taglist: @larinzz @syberianjade @lateuplight @altu-whump @enbious-prince @astr0-mj @thelazywitchphotographer @addictedsandwhichaki @justalittlecorrupted @quaggasus @theangstyclown @vernilliom @mothmancommitsarson @starssabove
Wanna be on the taglist? This'll take you there!
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serenailith · 2 years
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yesterday’s gone (we’ll make it through)—xxxi
on ao3 here
previous
okay, so. i know this took forever to get posted, and i'm sorry about that. truly. unfortunately, it was a pretty-much-can't-ignore forced break from writing/posting. the truth is i had a baby just last week, so i've been in hospital (3 days) and adjusting to having a newborn again. so... you get this chapter far later than i'd hoped.
yes, this is (unfortunately, again) the end of this fic. i've had such a wonderful time writing it, and i can't believe so many of you have liked reading it! the comments alone made it all so worth the time and effort i've put into writing it. thank you for being such wonderful, amazing readers. 🖤
remember: you can always find me in the dreamling discord server!
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Dream smiles to himself as he strides through the corridors. The Corinthian has been remade, different and so much better than what he’d been, and Gault is thrilled with her new position. The Vortex is gone. Fiddler’s Green has come home. Even Matthew has become a trusted ally, if a bit impudent at times.
All is right within the Dreaming once more.
Even more, all–or nearly so–is right within the Waking, as well. Dreamers sleep and wake as they should. The only matter of concern is Lyta Hall. She may hold anger in her heart for Dream, but it cannot be helped. Her child is of the fabric of the Dreaming itself; he belongs to the Dreaming and—by default—Dream, should the day come. Dream, for his part, only hopes that Rose Walker can convince her friend to not seek revenge.
There is very little that can bind an Endless, but he knows too well that the grimoire is still around. Someone has it, and anyone determined enough will find and use it. He isn’t naïve enough to believe otherwise, not after the proof he’d been given for over a hundred years.
The most precious thing to him, however, the thing he carries closest to his heart, is his time spent with Hob Gadling. Now that everything has become steady once more, Dream has left the Dreaming in Lucienne’s capable hands and spent those hours in the Waking. More often than not in Hob’s bed, his arms. It is the better way Dream has ever spent his existence.
Unfortunately, even Hob cannot remove the worries from Dream’s mind. Desire has plotted against him, and he knows they will never stop. Not until they get what they want–but what exactly is that? He very nearly spilled family blood because of them, when they were fully aware that the Fates would retaliate for his breaking the oldest laws. Dream is no closer to an answer.
If he is to be honest, he can hardly pinpoint the moment his favourite sibling became his least. Or why.
Forcing himself to dislodge the thoughts, Dream steps from one realm to the next, fighting a smile when he sees Hob through the window of the New Inn. A young woman just outside the door beams at the sight of Dream. He remembers her. Rena, who dreams of escaping her toxic home and making something of herself as a pilot. She has been kind to Dream whenever they encounter each other.
She doesn’t mind the fact he is horrible at communicating with people who aren’t Hob.
“Hey! How are you today?”
“I am well,” he replies, though his focus is on the man just inside. Almost belatedly, he tacks on, “And yourself?”
Her grin grows as she pulls up the sleeve of her jumper. Embedded in her skin is ink, swirls of colours surrounding a black semicolon. The stark contrast of black against rainbow brings a smile to Dream’s face. He understands what the symbol means for mental health; it has been on the minds of many a dreamer since the conception of the idea. That Rena has tattooed it into her skin bodes well for her survival.
“Got it last week. Mum and Dad hate it, but who cares, right? As long as I love it. And I do. Anyway! You’re looking at a pilot-in-training, by the way.”
“That is wonderful news.”
Rena giggles as she yanks her sleeve back down. “Mr G is covering for Ernie, but I’m sure he’ll be so glad to see you. He bought a new wine he thinks you might enjoy.”
“Thank you.” Dream dips his chin in a farewell. “I wish you well in your endeavours, Rena.”
“Thanks!”
She doesn’t mind that she doesn’t know his name. She still treats him as a friend. He moves past her and lets out a soft sigh when his fingers wrap around the door handle. The cool metal feels like a piece of home, though the Waking will never be where he fully belongs. But Hob. . . Hob is.
At the jingling of the bell, Hob glances up from where he is clearing tables of dirty dishes, and Dream relaxes at the wide smile splitting his love’s face. Raising his index finger in a ‘Just a moment’ gesture, Hob hurries to place the plates and glasses in a bin. He disappears behind the doors to the kitchen and reappears a minute later with a dishtowel in hand. He jerks his chin toward their booth, the one they always sit in whenever Dream deigns to remain in the New Inn instead of heading upstairs to Hob’s flat.
“Wasn’t expecting to see you today” is the first thing Hob says once they’ve sat.
“The Dreaming is much more stable now, so Lucienne is caring for it in my absence.”
Hob’s lips twitch, a hand stretching across the table. Dream cares little for others’ opinions as he allows Hob to take his hand. “I’m sure she appreciates the vote of confidence.”
“It was unacceptable,” Dream starts slowly; the words come forth as molasses in the winter, “for me to return after so long and pretend everything is as it was. Lucienne has been most loyal for over a hundred years. She deserves the respect I can easily afford to give.” It doesn’t escape his notice that Hob merely stares at him with a soft, sweet smile on his face. “Hob?”
“Sorry. It’s just. . . It’s nice to see how you’ve changed. I knew it logically. After all, look at where we are. But it’s still good to see proof of it sometimes. Makes me realise this isn’t just all in my head.”
“It very well could be,” Dream says with a small smile of his own. “However, this is as real as anything else in the Waking.”
“So you were gone for a few days. Anything I should be worried about?”
“No, the danger has passed.”
Hob raises a brow, clearly unimpressed with Dream’s answer, so Dream explains about Rose Walker and her friend’s situation. How there is a child borne of the Dreaming existing where he should not. About the Corinthian and Gault and Jed Walker’s unfortunate fate for so long. Hob’s expression darkens at the mention of the abuse the child endured. To Dream’s surprise, Hob commends the Corinthian for removing Jed from his personal Hell.
“I’m not saying he was good, but he certainly did a good thing by getting the kid away from that.”
“He took him to a gathering of serial killers,” Dream reminds him.
“Okay, so there’s that.”
Dream huffs out what would be a sharp exhale for anyone else but is as true a laugh from him as anything. He continues with the tale of Calliope and Richard Madoc, and Dream falls in love with Hob more at the anger–no, rage–on the man’s face. He assures Hob that Madoc has been properly dealt with. He will no longer be capable of capturing anyone else.
He can no longer do much of anything.
With no warning, Dream laces his fingers with Hob’s, squeezing gently, then rises to his feet. “I shall not keep you from your duties.”
“Don’t go far.”
“I will be upstairs, where I will await your presence.”
Hob’s answering grin sends something fluttering in Dream’s chest, and isn’t that just curious. He yearns, for a split second, for the companionship he had with Calliope, but he has it here with Hob Gadling. It isn’t the same; it never will be. But it’s enough. It is more than enough.
It is everything Dream will never deserve.
As he sits in Hob’s flat, Dream ruminates on everything that has happened since his escape from Fawney Rig. So much has occurred–he was nearly mortal for too long, his Sister returned him to his realm. Hob and Matthew, that impossibly likeable raven, had helped Dream retrieve his tools. He fell in love for the first time since the beautiful Muse who had birthed him a son.
Death always said he needed to mingle with humans more, try harder to understand them. Desire claimed he felt himself better than everyone, including his siblings. Dream is loath to admit that perhaps, only perhaps, they were both correct. Hob has opened his eyes to the wonders of humanity, the reality that comes with living. Dreams were well and good, but sometimes, seeing it yourself is what works most to change a mind.
Dream lets out a slow, unnecessary breath and runs a fingertip along a seam in the couch cushion. The fabric is soft with use, the foam padding sagging beneath the cover, and the remote sits on the far end where Hob most likely tossed it on his way to bed the night before. It’s worn in with love. Dream imagines his heart is the same way.
Hob slips through the door two hours later. Two hours during which Dream read and listened to the stereo. Etta James was a soothing voice, something he needed desperately. He was never nervous by any measure; he was the collective subconscious. There was nothing he couldn’t do, nothing he couldn’t bend to his will with the slightest effort. But this. . . This isn’t the same as warping the Dreaming or even what he can in the Waking.
Before Hob can say more than a “Hello, love”, Dream advances on him. The kiss is graceless in a way Dream doesn’t expect. It punches a quiet noise from Hob’s throat, but he kisses back just as enthusiastically. He smells of industrial cleaner and cedar, and Dream has never breathed a scent in so deeply. His head spins, another too-human response but one he relishes anyway.
He steers the two of them toward the bedroom, pulling away only to peel Hob’s shirt off and over his head. Hob’s lips move against his, but Dream only kisses away the words. They don’t need to speak. Not here, not now. He allows Hob to push him onto the bed, melts under the steady weight blanketing him. His fingers press to the mat of hair covering Hob’s chest.
Hob burns a path along Dream’s throat, whispering into the skin, “I love you, did you know that?”
“And I you,” Dream whispers back. “Until all universes cease to exist.”
Hob’s smile sparks a fire within Dream’s bones, and he pushes at Hob until he sprawls on his back. Dream straddles his thighs, leaving bruising kisses to Hob’s lips before moving across his jaw. His teeth worry at the junction of jaw to neck, and Hob reacts beautifully. His hips jerk upwards as his breath comes out in a rough exhale.
Dream loses patience with pretenses: He rushes through undressing Hob then himself before straddling his love once more. Hob grasps his hips, holds him steady, as Dream lowers himself onto his cock. There is no need to need the preparation, to act as a human would, not with Hob. He’s shown he doesn’t mind Dream’s inhuman, Endless existence.
Hob’s groan is the most wondrous music Dream has heard in centuries.
As much as he wants to drag this out, he can’t. He plants his hands against Hob’s chest and pushes his hips down to meet with the gentle thrusting. A strangled sound fills the air, and Dream glances down to see the sharp nails digging into Hob’s skin. He goes to move, but Hob shakes his head vehemently.
“No, leave them.”
“I do not wish to harm you.”
“It’s worth it,” Hob replies; his hands wrap around Dream’s wrists, pinning his palms where they are. “Doesn’t hurt much, anyway.”
“You are a true marvel, Hob Gadling.”
“Clearly not, if you’re still speaking perfectly fine.”
Dream lets out a soft chuckle and decides to give Hob what he’s silently asking for. Hob’s smile stutters, fades, as Dream moves more quickly. Jaw dropping open, Hob stares up at Dream like he’s some sort of masterpiece hanging in the most prestigious museum; Dream is intimately familiar with the thought.
Hob is more precious, more valuable, just more.
Once they are both spent and have caught their breath, Dream doesn’t hesitate before curling into Hob’s side. It should feel pathetic, as if he is weak for seeking out comfort, but Dream believes he has earned the right to this. To this happiness, this ecstasy, this security and safety.
Wouldn’t Desire be thrilled to see how their brother has fallen?
At no one else’s feet would Dream have ever imagined prostrating himself.
He follows Hob into the Dreaming, the Library where Lucienne is putting away books. She smiles widely when she sees Hob and ducks her head demurely in Dream’s direction. He wonders when his most loyal and his love became so close. Perhaps it has happened over the days that Dream was dealing with the Vortex and Unity Kincaid. Hob has proven himself a quick learner. There is no doubt in Dream’s mind that Hob will have entered the Dreaming proper whenever he wanted.
The thought warms Dream from the inside out.
They leave Lucienne minutes later, Hob promising to be back for a lively conversation over Saint Thomas Aquinas and Michel Foucault. Dream smiles at how the promise visibly delights her. The corridors are empty as he and Hob amble across the stone floor. They don’t speak–there is no need, for there is enough they’ve said many times over. Even their silence says it all again.
Fiddler’s Green is as expansive and breathtaking as ever. Hob immediately finds a spot beside the river lazily burbling by. Birds fly overhead, and branches sway gently in the breeze. Dream can feel the contentment rolling off of Fiddler’s Green in waves. His lips curve upward at the sensation, the soft tendrils of warmth and peacefulness.
Before, he would have found it impudent, out of line, but now. . . Now he recognises it for what it is: True loyalty to their Lord and a desire to see him happy. Of all things, happy. And happy he is, all thanks to Hob.
Hob slides his hand through the water, smiling at the tiny fish that swim up to nibble at his fingers. They dart away just as quickly, but he doesn’t seem to mind. If anything, he grins even brighter. His eyes shine, gleam honey-gold, in the sunlight when he looks up at Dream.
Dream can no longer keep the words to himself.
“I have told you I love you.”
“Many times, my love,” Hob agrees with a quick nod. His smile hasn’t dimmed.
“And I mean those words far more deeply than you can ever know. I warned you that love with an Endless only ever spells doom.” Dream holds up a hand when Hob opens his mouth. “Please, allow me to finish. I have been considering what you claimed, that you were no mortal. Perhaps you were correct.
“However, even if you were wrong, I. . . I would cherish the opportunity to have your love for as long as I possibly can. Even if it ends in unbearable agony, your love for me—you are worth everything that may come.
“You came to my aid when I escaped my captivity. When we entered Hell for my helm, you stepped forward to defend me without hesitation. Without my asking it of you. Hob Gadling, there is no universe in which I could not love you were you to exist there.”
“Dream. . .”
He reaches for Hob’s hand, gesturing with his other. The band rests there in his palm, and he carefully slides it onto Hob’s finger. The gem, a shard of the ruby which held his power not so long ago, glitters against the black, and Dream nods slowly at the sight. It suits Hob perfectly.
“You are aware that I rarely make promises I cannot keep.” At Hob’s nod, the quick glance between ring and Dream, he continues, “So believe me when I vow to love you as you deserve until I physically cease to exist. I will do all I can to make your life, both in the Dreaming and Waking, all that you dream of.”
Hob lets out a quiet laugh and shrugs. “Perhaps not the nightmares.”
“No, not the nightmares,” Dream concedes, though it is no hardship.
“Dream, I—I don’t know what to say. You know I love you and have for as long as I can remember. Centuries ago, I realised I needed to know more about my mysterious Stranger. That desire became love somewhere along the way, even when I knew I didn’t deserve to want such a thing. I wish to make you happy.”
Dream clutches at Hob’s hand, tight and unrelenting. Hob must know: Dream has not held such joy to live since Calliope, since Nada, since Killala. Those ended in tragedy, but this? This will be different. Hob has given him reason to live, much like he’d said Dream had given him reason to die.
At the assurances, Hob launches forward, dropping Dream’s hands, and kisses him soundly. Dream lets himself fall backwards to lie in the sweet-smelling grass. Sunshine beats down on the meadow, warm and relaxing and perfect as only the Dreaming can be. Hob rests over him, still kissing him, still sending sparks through Dream with every second of contact.
Abruptly—far too soon—Hob pulls back and frowns. “Wait, are we married?”
“Of course not,” Dream murmurs as he reaches up to brush hair behind Hob’s ear. “We are nothing so temporary.”
Hob stares at Dream, unblinking, before shaking his head. “So what are we?”
“We are bound, dear heart, until eternity meets its end.”
Hob beams, hands coming up to cradle Dream’s cheeks. The kiss he graces Dream with is soft, sweet, tender, and Dream cannot care that Fiddler’s Green is witness to this. With a wave of his hand, sand swirls around them, and then he and Hob are blessedly alone in his chambers.
He takes his forever love to bed.
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bonnymori · 3 years
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𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐲
Word count: 2760+ (i'll try to keep bigger lengths such as this one!)
Synopsis: You meet a new classmate who's working along Nanami, you think he's fun to be around, it stands the same to him about you. Later, feelings unravel.
Contents/Warnings: (1) Itadori Yuuji x gn!reader (2) FLUFF, TONS OF FLUFF - and some comfort (3) With the small participation of... Ino Takuma!! I really like him too, that's why <33333 (4) This is pretty platonic, but also not? (5) Ending turned sorta cliché... but I liked it u.u
A/N: This boy made me run rampant... to fhe point it's not single attraction anymore I just wish him happiness (smh if only my parents knew...) also next post will be Toji's fic pt. 2! Y'all see the first part is almost reaching 100 kudos????? I'M SO HAPPY EHSODJWKDKSJD- thanks for all the new followers and the support!! <33
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Ever since his fake death, Itadori has been training alone with the help of Gojo - and now, he works along a freshly new face, who belongs to a senior, founds out ex-salaryman named Nanami Kento. He's far a thousand times more strict than Gojo. Itadori doesn't really likes the change, because Nanami is a person he can't get along. This whole guy's appearance scream "work 4 life"; he has proved different, now he screams "work is shit - but I gotta do it because others won't".
They've just finished cleansing the outside of a movie theater off a few curses, when Itadori hears shouting from far behind them. Two figures approach, waving excessively. He quickly picks on Nanami's tired sigh beside him.
"Nanami! We figured out you'd be here! Our mission has been finished and we wanted to catch up to have lunch together!" A male clad in a full black outfit shouts, he has brown hair and a beanie on top of his head, looking quite content.
The other person simply trots next to him in silence, approaching with a friendly smile. They notice Itadori faster than the male, smile widening and quickly waving hello, suddenly eager to reach up to them. The gesture makes the pink haired boy perk up, curious to why the other person looked so joyful. His question is easily answered, when they tug on the man's sleeve and motion to him.
"Ino, we have a third buddy!" The dude looks at him with widened eyes. "So nice to meet you, I'm Y/N L/N! It's great to see new faces around!"
Itadori smiles at your energy, knowing already he would click with you very well.
"I'm Ino Takuma, sorry for not noticing you before! Your uniform looks cool." Itadori exchanges a few compliments with Ino, before the man turns to talk with Nanami, leaving him and you together.
"Yes! I'm Sukuna's vessel, Itadori Yuuji-desu! My type of woman is Jenn-"
You turn to him. "So, are you a first year?"
"Geh? Weren't you dead though?!"
"I was!- I am!- Please keep secret."
"Okay!"
"Ahem." Nanami coughs, drawing attention. "I requested you two to not come after me today. Itadori here is the reason why."
"That's no problem, we're very capable of keeping secrets." You threw your arm over Itadori's shoulder, him nodding along with you.
"Oh really, then remember to keep quiet about it. I'll let this slide." The group of students nervously at Nanami's intimidating tone. "But, I'll get to have my break alone."
"Gah!" Ino exclaimed, watching Nanami walk away; he also left the responsability of taking care of Itadori for you two, leaving without a word. "It really had to be today, when Nanami would take us to his favorite bakery..."
"Crybaby." You teased. "Itadori here can't go outside where anyone can see him, he's dead. So, we were to order food either way because he shouldn't be left out."
"Augh okay, it would be unfair."
"So, where are you staying Itadori?"
"At Gojo's state!"
"Whoa, I've never been there before." Ino commented, waiting as you sent a message to Ijichi to pick them up.
"He's my teacher, a very cool one!"
"I imagine! Ooookay, once we get there I'll get the food."
Itadori felt as his chest would burst of excitement, finally there was people around him again, he couldn't be less happy about it.
"Sharing is caring!"
Itadori laughed as you wrestled with Takuma for some fries, netflix long forgotten in the background, as watching the banter was way more entertaining. Most of the time, Ino rambled a lot about Nanami, while he rambled a lot about Gojo. The guy even showed him the cool scar under his beanie. He felt kinda upset after explaining the exchange was just temporary, his stay under Nanami's wing wasn't decisive, and therefore, he was more like a classmate than a partner.
Itadori also learned a lot about you. He was surprised to find out that you, although energetic, was the one to speak the lesser in conversations. His surprisement grew even bigger when you told him you're a exchange student from Kyoto, arriving Tokyo about the same month as him - thankfully, you were to say for good.
Conversations flowed easily in the air, until a voice from the doorway barged in.
"Yuuji-kun! Don't forget about your lessons! Hi kids! Bye kids!" Gojo said playfully, throwing the familiar punching bear to Itadori before leaving.
"What's this thing?" Ino asked.
"It's to help me control my cursed energy. So while I watch the movies, if I don't charge it with cursed energy it punches me square in the face. I thought I had mastered this thing already, but he insist I keep training with it." Itadori grumbles.
"At least it's cute." You commented, taking a sip of your drink.
"Until it punches you in your face without warning!" The pink haired boy barks.
The talks died down, the three of you eating quietly when another movie is played on the screen. Itadori didn't bother reading the title, it was a plain one about a zombie apocalypse that got him extremely bored, yet he kept watching still so the plushie didn't punch him in the face again; he's been keeping a record since all his last cursed energy training lessons were a sucess to this day. When his head started nodding and eyelids dropping Itadori can't remember well, about fourty five minutes of movie perhaps? Make it fifty, the second slumber took over his body completely.
When he awoke once again, it was near midnight, the clock on the wall told him so. He also noticed a soft and warm surface supporting his head, figures, it's your shoulder he's resting into, he feels an arm around his own shoulders and your cheek placed upon his hair.
"Hey, it's late." You immediately notices he's awake, calling out softly. "You should sleep on your room, or something, better to your spine."
He chuckles when you poke his side. "But I'm comfortable here."
"I'm surprised, you just met me today, and now is sleeping on my shoulder."
"I'm not, that happens often to me."
"Sleeping on people's shoulders?"
"No! Making friends quickly." Itadori likes your gentle warmth, your hug, everything makes him feel at home. "I met two more people before you for two weeks, but they can't see me, because I'm dead."
"So I'll keep you company, that's my new mission."
His eyes widen at that, a oh so little blush covering the tip of his ears.
"For how many time I slept anyway?" He asks.
"About two- no, three hours. You missed two movies, and this one is about to end."
"And you stayed here the whole time?" He motions to your shoulder.
"Yep. That reminds me I gotta pee."
Itadori grumbles, but quickly lifts himself off you, respecting your needs. That gives him some time to look around, he notices Ino is gone, and the plushie sits quietly at the other side of the couch, unmoving.
"Y/N! How did you manage to make it quiet down?" He's beyond bafflet.
"...que."
"What!"
"I said!" You arrive quickly at the doorframe, hands still wet from when you washed them. "I used my innate technique."
"Oh! How is it like?"
"It's kinda funny, gimme a moment." You left to wipe off your hands, coming back in a second. "So, just like Shoko, I produce reverse curse energy, but it's quite different than hers, I can't heal people. That's why we often call it positive energy instead. I can use it to soothe off negative energy, so the bear has no cursed energy right now."
"How does it works on people?" He felt very curious about everything, asking away like a kid.
"Since everyone has negative energy, it just makes you sleepy really. But when it comes to curses it's really practical, I can either weaken it or, if the curse is like grade three or four, I can slap them off existence completely by wiping all their energy." You were naturally proud of having a such versatile power, your own energy swirling with pride around you.
"That sounds amazing! Is it why I fell asleep though?"
"Nah, only if I did it on purpose. I guess you were just tired, hope you don't mind I decided to let you rest today."
"No way, it was a good nap."
You nodded. "By the way, Ino left to attend to a drinking party, he paid for our food."
"Drinking? Is he old?"
"Yeah, he's twenty." You chuckled, already expecting that kind of reaction.
"No way! He looks young just like us!"
"That's totally my reaction after I learned he's twenty!"
After that day, you started visiting Itadori weekly to daily, after exchanging numbers he made a little group with you and Ino, naming it the "Nanami trio". But really, he exchanges more texts with you in private, be them memes, cool images he wish to share, etcetera. Although, Ino wasn't left excluded, he ofter brough his xbox to connect to Itadori's tv room and you all would spend hours playing together; he just didn't spend much time with both of you as much. And that was okay.
For a few days, your connection with Itadori died down when he didn't reply to your texts. They would remain unread for some time, the longest being half a day, until he would spam apologies then move on with the topic. That became a routine until one day when you came over to check on Itadori unnanounced, needin to ease off your worries about the boy, only to find him sobbing in the middle of a hallway, staring ahead and beyond, his back to you.
"Ita-?"
"Egh!" Startled, he scrambled to wipe his eyes, turning to you. "H-hey, um, hi."
"What happened?"
"I- he-" His eyes didn't met yours, knuckles white in a death grip. You notice he has a few bandages thrown over his face and arms. The way his shoulders are drawn, as if he wants to shrink into himself is something you've experienced before.
"Something hard to talk about?"
He nods almost immediately, head still facing down.
"It's alright, come with me." You reach for his hands, grimacing slightly when his forceful grip is now on your hand, yet you don't comment on it. He follows you through the state wordlessly.
You two stop on the same tv room, sitting down on the couch. You then guide his head to your shoulder, gently massaging his scalp with the free hand.
"It's alright."
Those two words are chanted like a prayer for the next half hour, at some point, Itadori twisted his body towards yours and unknowingly caged you between him and the sofa arm. He embraced you with a force you didn't have in you, like he didn't want to lose one another. Painful or not, not a muscle moved on your body. He needed a shoulder to cry on.
Thirty minutes passed like seconds, you peered down only to find the boy confortably napping against your bosom; at some point you just became the cold side of the pillow to him. That's alright. It brings you joy to be the mom friend anyways. So you decided to join the sleepland aswell, arms still secured around his shoulders and the back of his head.
It feels like the nap hasn't been long, though, because you can feel Itadori's grip loosening and therefore, you're awake.
"Sorry if I broke any bones, in advance."
"Wow, and you only warn me now."
He laughs at your comeback, hands still secured around your waist.
"I'm surprised you let me uh, cuddle you for comfort - and sleep. I don't understand it? You just make me sleepy." He rambled, keeping eye contact with you while his head still rests on your chest.
"That's a piece of cake when you have younger siblings who seek for you every night they get a nightmare."
"Does that mean I can come to you again if I have a nightmare?" There it is, his togepi-kirby cutesy face.
"Are you four?"
"That's mean!" Itadori blushed, squeezing you on his arms. "I like the contact. It puts me at ease."
"Mm, do you want to talk about it?"
He gulped. "No, not really."
Your peach haired friend remained silent, and so did you. It seems he doesn't intend in letting you go soon, or he just really forgot to mention it. It gives them time to think, your younger sisted used to do that sometimes, back in Kyoto.
"Y/N, wanna watch anything?"
"Sure, have you watched Parasyte before?"
"No, let's give it a try then!" Itadori glances at the remote, then back at you - making you confused over his hesitation to move. He notices you noticed it, chuckling nervously. "To be honest, I don't wanna let go."
"It's hurting my back."
"SORRY I'M SORRY!" He jumped away from you like a cat would jolt away from a cucumber, making you snicker.
"It's okay, I just wanted to change positions."
And to tease you, but he didn't need to know that part.
He glared at you with a small pout, typing the initials of Parasyte on the search bar. Outside his line of vision, you were grinning like a idiot, his sweeteness took a tow on you. All the people of Tokyo you met really held a way different spirit from your classmates in Kyoto, Itadori being the nicest of all. It's surprising him being Sukuna's vessel to begin with; being honest, you felt drawn by it.
"Y/N, it's startiiiiing." He cut your daydreaming short, slumping on your side and propping his head on your shoulder.
"This again?" You throw an arm around his shoulders, very much like the first time he cuddled himself on you.
"Don't blame me, you're the one who wanted to change positions. Guess I'll just make some alterations since I'm awake this time!" One of his arms went behind your back and circled your waist, hand resting at your hip.
"It's definely different, since the other time you drooled on me."
"Hhgh, okay okay! Let me enjoy this." For perhaps the actual first time, you're able to watch without exchanging words with one another.
And this time, it's you who's head loll to the side, nose buried on his soft rose perfumed hair. Itadori doesn't comment on it yet, his free hand moves under your legs to lift your whole body up efortlessly when he senses you have fallen asleep.
"I remember you said it's bad for my spine, I wouldn't mind it... yours however."
The boy makes a beeline to the guest room, he sighs when there is no choice but open the door with his foot. Inside, he places you carefully in the soft bed.
Before he could leave, a hand reaches up for his sleeve.
"Itadori," He turned, looking at you. "Make me company?"
He giggles softly - you think it sounds like a highschool girl. "You should start calling me by my first name!" Itadori rambles as he climbs on the bed, arms wrapping around your waist in a motion you're familiar with.
"Yuuji, I'm tired, let me sleep."
"But I wanna talk more..." He pouts. "Also, are we, um, dating?"
You wriggle around, bringing his head down to peck on his forehead, teasing. "Correction, I want to date you."
"Uh, oh." A blush coats his face so quickly, you'd say someone dumped a bucket of red paint on his face.
"Is that a no?"
"No!"
"So it is a no."
"Christ, will you stop teasing for a second, I'm trying to talk here." He makes an angry version of his togepi-kirby face, you can't help but grin.
"You amuse me, but okay. I'll do it for you."
"Thanks." He blinks, the blush slowly fading away. "You know, I lied, not about the contact, I like the contact nonetheless-"
His hand moves to play with yours, such as tapping his tips against yours, or meassuring the palms.
"-it's you who brings me comfort."
It's also your turn to blush, that line was seriously charming.
"Yeah."
"Yeah?"
"Yes, we're dating now." You respond, a little eagerly. "Can I kiss you?"
"Please."
This is the best person I could ask for, Itadori thinks, keeping his eyes open as yours shut during the kiss, whom I won't change for anything else in this world.
When you both separate, Itadori feels drowsy and sleepy. His face fits perfectly on your shoulder as always.
"Goodnight, my favorite person."
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kylorengarbagedump · 4 years
Text
Defy Your Authority: Chapter 2
Read on AO3. Part 1 here. Part 3 here.
Summary: So, like, what's the big deal, buddy?
Words: 3800
Warnings: None. Yet.
Characters: Kylo Ren x Reader
A/N: Hello!! Firstly, thank you so much to @bastila-ren​ and @elmidol​ for listening to me talk so much about this fic, for reading the first two chapters, and helping me with their generous feedback.
Secondly, I want to thank all of you for your EXTREMELY generous response to this fic. I admit I was very nervous to post this, and still am very nervous to write it, but I can't explain how helpful it is to know that people still enjoy the story and want to read more. It's definitely a story I want to write!
Y’all have truly been too kind to me. I don't have a posting schedule, just yet--I'm hoping every week or every other week. :) Love y'all SOOOOO MUCH.
Like the smarmy bastard he was, Hux fought off a smirk. But Allegiant General Pryde gazed at you with what some might refer to as sheer, indignant horror.
Kylo Ren stopped feet from the throne, his gaze wandering your grungy hair, dirtied uniform, the cell filth on your face.
“Hm,” he said. “That’s one way to greet your Supreme Leader.”
Embers tickled your cheeks. Your Supreme Leader.
You looked at the two other men. What was on your tongue: Would you prefer I get on my knees instead?
What you ended up saying: “Uh, sorry. Sir.”
“I believe the Supreme Leader requires an apology a little more comprehensive than uh, sorry.”  Pryde stepped forward, as if to explain. “Sir, this woman was brought aboard by General Hux without prior approval.”
Kylo glanced between the older men, stare drifting to you, the darkness in his eyes reviving an animal within you that had been placed on life support. 
“Yes,” he replied. “I don’t recall providing authorization for this.”
“Supreme Leader,” Hux said, “we both know your TIE has been out of commission for several cycles. I thought it prudent to--”
“You thought it prudent to ask a manager of a remote outpost to come aboard the flagship of the First Order. I assume that’s what you’re about to say.” Pryde paused, waiting for Hux’s contrition--but none came. He turned to Kylo. “Sir, again, please forgive me. Had I known he’d be bringing aboard a rim-dweller who would defy your authority, I would’ve denied his request, entirely.”
“Defiance.” Kylo’s gaze drilled you. Much like you had dreamt of something else of his drilling you. “I hadn’t noticed.”
Pryde balked. “Well, I hardly find it appropriate to address the Supreme Leader of the First Order as dude, for starters.” He spat the word onto the floor like poison. “Really, General, you and her both should be begging for his pardon.”
You swallowed, attention on Kylo, trying to hide your glee. “Please, please forgive me,” you murmured. “Supreme Leader.”
Hux cleared his throat. “My apologies as well, sir.”
“Hm.” If he’d understood your tease, he didn’t acknowledge it. You frowned. Kylo looked to the cloaked mercenaries behind you. “Escort her back to Orinda.”
Disbelief smacked you across the face. “I’m sorry, what?”
Sputtering, Hux stepped forward. “Supreme Leader--”
“You don’t belong on this vessel,” Kylo said, glimpsing you, then the cloaked figures again. “Report is postponed. Prepare the Buzzard for departure.” 
Like droids, they activated and brushed past you, stalking toward the turbolift. The Supreme Dickhead gazed at you expectantly.
“They’re not patient.”
You shook your head, crossing your arms. “If you think I’m leaving--”
“Supreme Leader,” Hux said again. For once, you felt like both of you were stuck in the same flabbergasted pod. “Repairing your fighter has already wasted the time of numerous engineers, we don’t need to add--”
“Perhaps every engineer aboard deserves to have their time equally wasted, General.”
Hux’s jaw tensed. “If you wish, sir,” he replied. “But we could resolve the issue now.”
“We won’t.”
For whatever reason, Kylo Ren seemed dedicated to preventing you from working on this ship, as if he didn’t know your skill level. As if he believed other engineers deserved a shot at it over you. Ignoring the furious trembling of your fingers, you dug them into your sleeves. 
“What, you don’t think I’m capable?” you asked, frowning.
Pryde sighed. “Supreme Leader, the Council--”
Kylo pivoted to you. “No.” There was no hint of mockery or deception in his tone. “You’re capable.”
You swallowed, shrugged your shoulder. Tried not to sound hurt. “Then why won’t you let me try?”
Hazel eyes lingered, held you in silence for deafening seconds. There was something very, very tired inside of them. 
“Sir,” Pryde said, “as much as I love the rousing debate over whether or not this rimrat should be deemed worthy of working on your starfighter, the Supreme Council meeting is in minutes.” He turned to you. “I believe you’ve been directed to leave.”
You furrowed your brow, but miraculously managed to say nothing. The muscle under Kylo’s nose twitched. 
“You’ll get two hours.” He didn’t seem excited about the idea. “After that, you will return to Orinda.”
“Yeah, sure. Whatever,” you sighed. “Sir.”
A huff escaped him. “The Supreme Council meeting.” He turned, strode to the exit. “Come.”
Pryde frowned. “Sir, shouldn’t Hux return her to the hangar?”
“No.” Kylo’s voice ricocheted in the chamber. “She’s coming.”
Something like joy sparkled in your heart. Hux jutted out his chin, smirking at Pryde, who frowned and looked to you. You resisted the urge to stick your tongue out at him. There was a puzzle in his mind regarding your identity, a puzzle he was struggling to put together without the missing pieces. You weren’t interested in offering them. 
The three of you followed Kylo into the turbolift. Out of irritation, you stood as far away from him as possible. Awkward quiet settled in the air, and you grit your teeth, ignoring the sting of humiliation at your cheeks. Sure, it was nice he was inviting you to his little meeting, but that hardly compensated for the fact that it had been four entire months since you’d seen him and he was intent on booting you without so much as a parting fuck. 
Not that you wanted to fuck him after that stunt. 
Mostly.
The lift descended. Kylo hadn’t even looked at you, despite your best attempts at petty distancing. Hundreds of words hung on your tongue, and so few of them were appropriate for the ears of Hux and Pryde. Luckily for you, you could think them, instead.
Jackass.
The blast door slid open, and Kylo exited without response, the two generals on his heels. You lagged behind them, glare boring into the broad-shouldered bastard with the flowing cape.
Can’t believe this asshole was here the entire time, knowing everything, with all of the power in the galaxy, just doing bantha-shit about it.
Stormtroopers passed in formation, nodding in deference to the men in front of you as you turned a corner. The clomping of boots was the only sound for meters.
Leaving you for four months, horny as hell, lonely as hell, all while he was here doing what? Jerking off? As if he hadn’t begged you to stay. Please.
At the end of the hall, a set of blast doors parted, and you trailed the group inside, greeted by a massive, jet-black table with a hologram projector buried in the center. The occupants of about a dozen chairs turned, their eyes stuck to you, assessing you. Kylo crossed to the head of the table, Hux and Pryde taking spaces near him. The only open seats were at the back, relegated for only the most irrelevant attendees. You slunk over to one, sinking into it.
Apparently you’re not relevant to anyone in this room, anyway.
“Who’s this?” A balding officer of high-rank stared at you. “Supreme Leader?”
Pryde leaned forward. “She’s the Chief--”
“Who she is,” Kylo drawled, “is none of your concern.” 
Blood heated your face. The room rumbled with uncertainty, but only for seconds. 
“Sir,” said an older woman with slick blonde hair, “Multiple locations on Kamino refused entry to officers seeking out junior recruits. Our entry-level ranks are suffering. Requesting additional--”
Kylo glanced at her. “Yes.”
She nodded. “Thank you, sir.”
“Supreme Leader,” said an older, white-haired man. “Surveillance indicates that a fuel depot located in the Inner Rim has received communications from Resistance starships.”
“Have they responded?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Eliminate them.”
“Yes, sir.”
Another, dark-skinned woman inched to the edge of her seat. “Supreme Leader, ground troops found no evidence of Resistance sympathizers on the most recent patrol of Aeos Prime.”
“And the infrastructure.”
“Seems salvageable, sir.”
Kylo blinked, as if the answer hadn’t even mattered. “Move to the next outpost in the system.”
“Of course, Supreme Leader.”
Yet another man cleared his throat. “Supreme Leader, if I may…”
Swallowing, you stared into the gleaming tabletop, tracing the rivets of white light bordering the projector. Voices rose, offering status updates and seeking approval of the man at the head of the room. Obviously, there was nothing attractive about how competent and powerful Kylo Ren appeared in this setting. And this definitely did not tingle pride in your belly watching every single person in this room vie for his favor, knowing that out of all of them, the one he’d fucked was you.
Then again, maybe that was the very crux of the issue. His time and attention was desired and demanded and split between thousands--he directed and delegated an entire, galaxy-wide government. He commanded armies. Strategized operations. Balanced every need, tangible and intangible, with only two hands.
You spent your days bathing in ion dust.
The Allegiant Asshole cleared his throat, breaking you from your pity party. “General Hux,” he said, “didn’t you have your pet project to present?”
All eyes turned to Hux, his face dull with irritation. Lips pursing, he straightened his spine, fingers whizzing over the data screen at his seat. One swipe, a quick field entry, and the projector hummed to life, shooting a blue hologram of a TIE fighter above the table. It flickered, rotating like a display.
“The First Order has regularly demonstrated deficient performance during naval engagements, despite our superior numbers and resources,” Hux said. “After gathering data, we discovered that during our most recent missions, the TIE fighter is regularly out-piloted by Resistance sympathizers.” He tapped the screen, and the hologram split into a cross-section. “Thorough research indicates the TIE model is obsolete.”
The room crackled with whispers, officers turning to each other and looking to Hux, their faces twisted in disbelief. Kylo Ren sat, saying nothing, trained on the display. 
Sighing, you gazed at your hands and cleaned your nails. To you, this was obvious. Of course the basic TIE models--the TIE/fo models--were obsolete. The ships were highly inflexible, carried little firepower for their unwieldy construction, and had no hyperdrive application. In comparison to the model used by the Special Forces, the TIE/fo was practically useless. 
It was less obvious why these high-ranking strangers seemed unable to handle the truth.
“General,” said a dark-skinned man. “Are you proposing we abandon the TIE corps?”
Hux pressed the screen again, and it zoomed in on an exposed ion engine. “At the very least, the most basic TIE corps is woefully unequipped in comparison to Resistance fighters.”
“That’s ridiculous,” he replied, “our pilots are extensively trained.”
Pryde sneered. “Admiral Griss is correct,” he said. “Our elite troops don’t demonstrate any issue with crushing Resistance burrows.”
“Elite troops are never the ones defending a new occupation.” Hux gestured to the engine blueprint. “We sacrifice our progress because of this antiquated construction.”
“And what’s so antiquated about it?” Pryde sneered. “The construction is based on the Imperial TIE. These ships were a well-known symbol of naval superiority.”
“Updated for modern needs,” added Griss. 
Hux’s voice rose a decibel. “Not modern enough, given how frequently a single X-wing will decimate an entire unit.”
You wanted to groan. Against your will, you had to admit Hux was right. Orinda regularly saw straggling, crippled TIEs smash into the valley outside the hangar in attempts to land for repair. Mirna had pulled more pilots than you could count out of blazing wreckage.
“Do you suggest we change the basic TIE unit, then?” Griss asked.
“Perhaps,” Hux replied, “or we move to a different construction entirely.”
The other officers chuckled, murmurs rippling through the ranks again. 
“Supreme Leader,” Pryde said, “what he’s suggesting is absurd. Sienar-Jaemus manufactures perfectly appropriate and functional fighters at an affordable price to the First Order. It’s been done this way since the Empire.”
Rolling your eyes, you sat back in your chair. For a General of a government allegedly interested in innovation and progress, Pryde seemed to love sucking the Empire’s dick. The fact that they were refusing to even entertain Hux’s idea was, well…
“Perhaps we should place a double order for the basic fighters, sir,” Pryde continued. “To demonstrate their capability.”
You snorted. “Now that’s absurd.”
Every voice in the room died. Leather squelched, and you glanced up from your nails in time to see a dozen bodies shifting in their seats to turn and look at you. Inwardly, you cursed--you hadn’t had to practice volume control in months. 
At the head of the table, Kylo Ren stared. His expression, even to you, was indiscernible. But even if he was mad, you wouldn’t have cared. Not as long as he still intended on kicking you off the Steadfast without another word.
Shrugging, you said, “General Hux is right. The original TIE model is flawed. They lose out one-on-one almost every time.” Kylo still said nothing, the rest of the room too confused to interrupt you. “I guarantee there’s more credits spent on replacement models than it would cost to invest in something more versatile.”
Griss’s nose wrinkled, and he looked between you and Kylo. “I…” When Kylo offered no response, Griss settled on you. “I’m not sure what brought you here, ah… Lieutenant, but regardless of your purpose, you’re surrounded by superiors of the First Order. Don’t speak out of turn.”
“Right,” you said, “I do apologize, sir.  But you have to admit that this all is a little absurd. I see busted up basic TIEs all the time. They’re a failure.”
“Yes,” he replied, “and you are?”
“Chief of Operations on Orinda.”
“An outpost?” The room echoed with laughter, and you bristled. Griss gestured to you. “Supreme Leader, please, why is this woman here?”
Pryde nodded. “I know you have your reasons, sir, but surely she doesn’t belong in this room.”
“Maybe this woman knows what she’s talking about,” you mumbled.
“Excuse me?” Griss whipped around, leering at you. “Mind repeating yourself, Lieutenant?”
Volume control. Really needed to get better with that. 
Gathering a breath, you swallowed your ire. You could not spend all two hours on the Steadfast immediately making enemies with the military leaders of the First Order. Given Kylo’s state, you doubted he’d encourage your attitude. 
“My apologies,” you said, bowing your head, “I’m just. Nervous. Being on this ship for the first time.”
“Perhaps you’ve spent too much time on Orinda,” said Griss. “You’ve forgotten the hierarchy.”
“She needs re-education,” said the balding man.
The dark-skinned woman huffed. “Or a demotion.”
“Some form of discipline, surely.”
“Yes,” said Pryde with a glare. “Perhaps that should be arranged.”
Your heart skipped.
“Enough.”
Every person in the room spun, attention on Kylo Ren.
He was still inscrutable. Still gazing directly at you. 
A shiver spilled over your spine. Like instinct, your thighs pressed together. 
“General Hux,” he said. “Prepare a plan for the replacement of the basic TIE model.” A pause. No one spoke a word. “Dismissed.”
You remained in your seat as the other officers rose, their lips sealed as they filed out of the room. Hux scowled at you--ungrateful prick--and acknowledged Kylo’s order before leaving. Pryde scrutinized you, his focus flipping between you and his Supreme Leader as he stood from the table. 
“It’s time to leave, Lieutenant,” he said.
“I need a moment,” you replied, glancing at him. “Sir.”
Pryde turned to Kylo. “Sir?”
Kylo’s face was blank. “Dismissed, General.”
Whatever Pryde was thinking, he didn’t say. He offered deference to the Supreme Leader before strutting out, the blast door shutting behind him.
The moment it closed, the room thickened with heat, like stars vaporized the air. Sweat beaded your hairline, your tongue drying to paper. Every movement you thought to make was paused, paralyzed by confusion. Had it been four months ago, you’d be getting railed on top of the table or in his chair, you were sure of it. But Kylo seemed almost indifferent now. It neutered every response that came to mind.
Here you were, alone with Kylo Ren for the first time since you’d left. He was only meters away from you. And you had absolutely no idea what to do.
“Your time is limited, Lieutenant.”
A reminder he wanted you gone. You shook your head, chewing the inside of your lip. 
“The silencer is free to be inspected.”
Indignance tightened your chest. Your face was on fire.
“Or perhaps,” Kylo said, “you’d rather travel directly to Orinda.”
You whirled on him. “So you knew I was on Orinda the entire time?” Your frustration was unfettered. “You knew and just didn’t do anything about it? For four months?”
His stare didn’t yield. “Yes.”
“Yes?” you said. “That’s it? That’s all you have to say for yourself? How do you expect me to respond to that?” More heat gripped your neck. He was still. “Why do you want me gone so badly? You act like you don’t even want me around.”
“I don’t.”
The words were switchblades to your chest. You shook your head, gulped your pain.
“Uh. Okay. Wow.” Sighing, you continued, “But don’t you--I mean. You pleaded with me to stay.”
He said nothing.
“You... I know how you feel. You can’t hide that from me. Do you…” Your throat was tight. “Did something change?”
For four months, you had wondered what had been going on in Kylo Ren’s mind. Seeing him draped in the responsibility of the Supreme Leader of the First Order, hesitation crept into your gut. Within his gaze, perhaps only apparent to you, there was a black, terrible emptiness, like shadows reined in by his rage. Exhaustion hung in dark circles under his eyes and at his cheeks. His presence was as breathtaking as it ever had been, only haunted with the weight of the galaxy. 
For four months, you had wondered. You didn’t know, now, if you wanted the answer.
“You don’t belong here.” Kylo paused, then stood, moving toward the door. “Your presence is not warranted.”
“Warranted? That’s not what this is about.” You shot to your feet, intercepting his path. “You knew where I was, and you never once came to me! You left me there! Alone!” He side-stepped you, and you followed him, keeping your eyes chained to his. “Didn’t you miss me?” you asked. “Didn’t you think about me?”
He stalled. Exhaling through his nose, he spoke through his teeth. “Yes.”
“Then why didn’t you find me?” you said. “You promised!” 
Kylo stood, trapped in your stare, his fingers furling into fists.
“I know how you feel about me.” You advanced on him. “I know it.” 
You were so near you could feel his breath, count the individual strands of his hair, bask in the warmth of his body. A short inhale, and memory slammed you like gravity--the scent of his skin, his palms gripping your waist, his lips brushing your ear. The ache in your hands at night when they were not full of him, the bedtime yearning in your limbs when they were not wound around his. You had known him, known him, as if his blood ran in your veins.  
This was the closest you’d been to Kylo Ren in weeks upon weeks. Somehow, you only felt further away.
“Why?” you asked. “Why didn’t you find me?” After all of it, he only stared. It lit you with rage, and you bumped your chest with his. “Say something!”
The muscle in his jaw tightened. His shoulders rolled. But he was silent. 
A peal of bitter laughter escaped you. Whatever issues he had didn’t mater. You deserved more than what he was offering.
“Wow. Okay.” You shrugged, stepping back. “I don’t know who I was thinking about for these past four months, but it definitely wasn’t you.” Shaking your head, you turned toward the door. “Whatever, dude. Fuck you.”
You took a single step, and Kylo snatched your wrist, whipped you against his body. 
“You say that,” he breathed, “as if you haven’t been thinking about getting fucked since you arrived.”
Oxygen fled your lungs. Every blood cell in your body piled onto your cheeks and between your legs. In seconds, you were a throbbing, pent-up, swell of lust. 
You swallowed. “Oh, please,” you muttered. “You can’t distract me that easily. You know I need answers.”
“Hm.” Kylo scanned your figure. “So you say.”
“You’re such an asshole.” You tried to peel your wrist free. “Why didn’t you do this weeks ago, huh?”
His face darkened, his hold on you tightened. 
“You ask questions that have no answers.”
“Ugh. Get off.” Grunting, you shouldered him, body buffeting his like a flaccid wave. It would’ve been arousing, his strength, how utterly solid he was, if he wasn’t making you miserable in this moment. “You’re so full of it, man. Let me go. I’ll go repair your dumbass ship and you can send me back to Orinda, like you so clearly want.”
“You presume to understand what I want.” His voice was severe, a dull blade. “You will not stay here.” The ghost of a smirk fled his face. “But you won’t escape punishment when you’re gone.”
You shuddered, stuck out your chin. “Your punishments don’t scare me.”
Kylo growled. “Really.” A leather palm cupped the back of your neck, tugged you close. “Such confidence.”
You couldn’t help it. A tiny, excited whimper left you. Kylo shifted, his hand squeezed--
The projector in the table beeped. An incoming transmission. The both of you froze, staring at the blinking request on the interface.  You coughed, patted his chest as a signal to answer it. The knot in his throat bobbed, and he released you, crossing to the console and accepting the message.
Hux appeared in hologram form. “Supreme Leader,” he said, voice even more snivelly through the broadcast. “We received a distress signal from Orinda. Multiple Resistance fighters have been detected on radar. Requests for response from the officers stationed there have gone unanswered.”
The joints in your body locked. Your mouth opened, but nothing came out.
“Permission to dispatch TIE units, sir,” Hux said.
Kylo was still. “Dispatch.”
“Yes, sir.”
The hologram winked out. Before you could process, your feet were moving you toward the door.
“I gotta go.” Your pulse pounded in your temple. The entirety of your crew was down there. By themselves. “I gotta go there. I gotta get there. I’m sorry, I know I said I would repair your ship but--”
“Stop.” 
“--it’s probably for the best anyway, I just gotta find some way there, I--”
He spoke your name like a command. You stopped. Stared into his tired, empty eyes. 
His chest fell in a small sigh. “We’ll take the Buzzard,” he said. “Come.”
Kylo Ren tread past you, through the blast doors, into the hallway. The tatters of your bewildered heart weren’t a priority right now. You followed him--your Supreme Leader.
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stevesharrlngtons · 4 years
Text
adam, carved from the rib of eve.
roman godfrey x reader
summary: godfrey industries throws a party in the honor of their new ceo. roman is less than thrilled to be attending, but at least he has you. 
word count: 3.4k (a shortie)
a/n: i am such a slut for the “i hate everyone but you” trope as you can probably tell and that’s basically this fic lol. i ended up not loving the ending to this, but i like the beginning so i’m posting it anyways lol
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Roman’s hand hadn’t left the small of your back for hours. His fingers widened and drummed and stroked and squeezed you through the slinky fabric of your dress, to both soothe himself and to keep you intune with his moods throughout the evening. His nails would probe into your skin when someone would approach him that he disliked, telling you with his fingertips of his distaste. Leaving small crescents in your dress and the smooth skin underneath kept him from showing his true loathing for an employee on his face. At certain points during the evening, you were worried that Roman would draw blood from his ministrations, fearing little lines of crimson would blot your dress and force you to tie his suit jacket around his waist like some midwestern mother. During these moments, you’d reach out to stroke his lapel or lean your temple to his shoulder in a show of affection and warning. Roman would ease his prodding and smooth his fingertips over his marks in sweet apology. 
Tonight was a big night for Roman. Tonight was the night that he was being officially inducted as the new CEO of Godfrey Industries. Large posters had been unrolled from the ceiling that pictured his signature pout and chilling glare; a slideshow that was being projected on a far wall of the rented ballroom showed pictures of Roman, Pryce and JR; napkins were leafed across tables with a congratulation message for Roman’s succession. Tonight was a momentous night in the history of The White Tower and the Godfrey legacy, and Roman was miserable. 
He hated that everyone wanted to talk about his father and Norman and his mother and Pryce and what he would do for the company in the future. He hated that he had to put on a neutral face and hob knob with men and women he deemed to be serfs and peasants. He hated that men eyed you up and down and women tried to grope him and he hated that anyone thought they were worthy of your combined presence. If either of you were forced to shake another hand he’d blow his brains out (hyperbole, unfortunately, because he could see a fat man with a wet upper lip approaching him).
But, he thanked whatever higher power that was out there that you were by his side, looking gorgeous and regal and supportive. Roman Godfrey said a silent thank you to every God his mind could name that you loved him and he loved you back, because he could not fathom attending this party without you. Without you smiling when he couldn’t conceal his hatred, without you lightening the mood with sweet anecdotes and pretending to look interested when his employees talked to you. 
You nodded and hummed and asked thoughtful follow up questions that left the impression on his lessers that Roman Godfrey and his girlfriend were good people; the kind of people who cared about the lives of their workers. He would be utterly lost without you, a thought that crossed his mind every time he glanced down at you, huddled into his side with a glass of champagne cradled in your dainty hand. 
Well, that and how much he wanted to fuck your brains out when you both returned home. You looked down right delicious in your evening gown.
Unfortunately when there is a party thrown in your honor, people are interested in talking to you. Soaking up your presence without any regard for how the honoree might feel. The mouth breathing attendees wrapped in their rented Men’s Wearhouse tuxedos didn’t care that Roman just wanted one minute alone to cozy up to his girl, as they formed a line to congratulate him and try to perform for him as a way to prove their keep. Little did they know they were just doing the opposite, only fueling his ire for them. Thankfully, the line had diminished for the first time that evening, leaving you and Roman to your own devices by the bar. 
“Thank fucking God,” Roman murmured as he order a bourbon and another glass of champagne for you. 
“Just try to grin and bear it. We can leave in an hour.” You reply, squeezing his hand that still resided near your backside. 
He groaned, “An hour?” 
“Yes, an hour. This party is for you. You don’t want to seem ungrateful or stuck up.” 
The bartender placed your drinks in front of each of you. Roman took his quickly and took a long pull from the glass. 
“You my PR director now?” He muses. 
“Hell yes I am, and you better be thankful,” You say, quite matter a factly, “I make you look good, approachable, the boy next door. Not the playboy who snorts coke off of hookers tits. I am the Persephone to your Hades. And people love it.” 
Roman chuckles, “I can’t say I don’t like that comparison.” 
You smile at him over the rim of your glass. Roman takes a drink from his own glasses and swallows thickly before speaking again.
“You know I am thankful for you, right?” 
Your grin softens at the uncharacteristic confession and you place your glass back on the bar so you can cozy up to him, “I’m thankful for you, too.” 
Roman stared down at you, love and appreciation pooling in his green eyes as his hand loops around you to link with his other. You place both hands on his chest and kiss his chin chastley as Roman melts into your embrace. You make him feel so needy and weak in a way he had always chased away and feared. But you made him love it, revel in it, look forward to the feeling. Though, it made his guard fall, you and your sweet kisses and sweeter touches, and right now, while he was in a room full of judgmental employees that he was trying to make see him as their alpha, probably wasn’t the best time for him to be turning to honey and sun shining warmth. 
Luckily (or not so luckily) the haze you two were in was broken by an onlooker. 
“I believe congratulations are in order.” 
Roman’s glare hardens within seconds as he looks away from you to Pryce, who stands behind you, hands clasped behind his back. 
“I don’t need them.” Roman replies, letting you untangle yourself from him. 
“Well, I offer my sincere pride and happiness for you, anyway.” Pryce says with a tight lipped smile. 
Roman doesn’t respond, just raises his eyebrows at the other man. 
After a beat of uncomfortable silence, Pryce moves his attentions to you, “(Y/N), you look stunning tonight.” 
“Thank you, Doctor.” You respond politely. 
“I’ve heard from many patrons tonight that you have bewitched them, they are all fat and happy with the care you’ve shown them.”
“I do what I can.”
“I would enjoy it if some of that good will would rub off on you, Roman. It isn’t becoming for any of us for you to look like a tyrant.”
Roman scoffs, “I don’t want them to like me. I want them to be fucking scared of who I am and what I can do.” 
“I believe Mussolini said something similar.” Pryce quips back quickly. 
“I’ll be their fucking Mussolini if I have to be.” 
“Let’s hope you’ll be more effective.” 
And again, there is a tense pause between the three of you. You sip the bubbles from your glass and try to burrow into Roman’s side to calm him. You knew Roman was capable of explosive outbursts, and you really preferred if he didn’t have one tonight in front of all these people. Especially at Pryce, when they were supposed to be creating a united front for the company. 
“Well, unfortunately I didn’t just come over to offer my congratulations,” Pryce begins. 
“It’s never just one thing with you,” Roman responds spitefully. 
“I came over to inform you that you are expected to give your speech soon.”
Roman’s jaw ticks, “What fucking speech?” 
“The speech we discussed last week.” 
“We didn’t discuss shit.”
“Believe me or not, we discussed a speech last week. Though, I suppose I am not surprised you don’t remember, as you seemed less than thrilled with the news when I gave it to you.” Pryce lamented. 
“I am less than fucking thrilled about it now.” He snapped. 
“I don’t know what to tell you, Roman. This is a part of the job; addressing the troops.” 
“I don’t address the troops, I delegate someone to do that for me. Which is you, in the scenario.” 
“I am already giving a speech tonight, Roman. The one before your own that introduces you.” Pryce informs. 
Roman doesn't retort, just clenches his jaw tightly, you could see his muscles pulse through his skin. The glare he was giving Pryce would have made a lesser man quake, make them sweat and tremble with fear. But, the good doctor was used to Roman’s stares. 
“Go fuck yourself.” Roman spat, his face so close to Pryce’s that you could see flecks of spit freckle his skin. 
Roman then stormed off, pushing his way through the crowd and disappearing. 
Pryce gives a deep sigh, taking out a handkerchief to wipe his face while you simply shrug. 
“I can’t say it doesn’t worry me that a bonafide child will be taking over this company.” 
“Easy.” You say, reminding Pryce who he is talking too, “He’s just overwhelmed. He’s not much for public speaking.”
“But public tantrums he has no problem with.” 
“He’s very passionate. Something that will take this company far. Don’t forget that he is JR’s son, who himself was a very passionate man.” 
Pryce eyes you, “Will you continue to spin his outbursts into good omens?” 
You shrug again, this time with a budding smile, “I don’t mind.” 
He snorts, “What we do for love.” 
“Tell me about it.” You reply, before leaving Pryce by himself at the bar and going to search for Roman. 
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You found him in a back hallway of the ballroom, back pressed to the wall with his knees to his chest, a lit cigarette between his lips.
“You look very modelesque right now. Very sexy,” You smirked and Roman looked up at you, “Like this in black and white? Boom, Vogue cover guaranteed.” 
You walked toward where he sat and smoothed your dress against the backs of your thighs so you could do the same. You faced him and rested your cheek to his bent knee. 
“You’re very funny,” He replied sarcastically, taking another drag from his cigarette, “Maybe I’ll just quit now and work on finding an agent.” 
“Well, you have the bone structure for it.” You played, but Roman still seemed less than amused.
“I’m serious. What if this is a sign?” He said, twiddling the filter between his thumb and forefinger. 
“What, the speech?” 
“Yes, the speech. What if me fucking it up, forgetting about it, is some sign from the business Gods that I’m just bound to mess this all up in the end? That I’ll embarrass myself and my father…” Roman’s voice shook at the periods. 
He was terrified, but had done a good job at hiding it. Over the last few weeks, you had been asking him how he felt about taking over at Godfrey, and everytime his answer was succinct and indifferent. Each time he told you that he was perfectly fine with the idea, as it was something that had been promised to him since birth. You never pried or pushed, but you made sure to keep a closer eye on his feelings than you normally did. You had a feeling the other shoe was going to drop and Roman would feel the weight of this decision lay on him, you were just waiting for when. 
“Baby, hey,” You cooed, snuggling closer to his folded up form, “None of that is going to happen, and you forgetting some stupid speech doesn’t mean anything. It means that you forgot, that's it. You’re human, you’re allowed to make human mistakes.” 
“Not in this job. Not when everyone is already waiting for me to fail.” Roman said.
“Well, you still are, because I’m telling you. You are allowed fuck ups and mistakes. It makes you seem more relatable.” You pluck the cigarette from between his fingers and take a drag. 
“I don’t want to relatable to those people,” Roman spits, “My God, nothing sounds worse.” 
You giggle, “Good thing you will never be like those people out there. Because those people, the ones out there desperately searching for your approval? Those people were born to worship men like you, Roman. You were born the man to be worshipped, the man to be followed.” 
Roman looked at you with his big doe eyes, both filmed with unshed tears as his lips pursed. You moved to place his cigarette back between his pouted mouth and let your thumb sweep across his bottom lip as you did.
“You, Roman Godfrey, will be amazing. You will shock and awe any and everyone. You’re not going to fail, because you don’t know how, baby. You are the man that I love, and no matter what, that won’t change.” 
A few tears had fallen on his cheeks as you spoke and Roman sniffled quietly, “You promise?” 
“I do.” And you leaned forward to slot your lips with his. 
The kiss was gentle and reassuring, you could taste the salt of his tears and the bourbon and smoke on his tongue. Roman’s hand came around to rest on your side and you purred at the contact. 
When you parted, it was because you could both hear the muffled sound of Pryce’s booming voice over the microphone. 
“Fuck,” Roman groaned, thunking his head against the wall, “What the fuck am I supposed to do?” 
“This is what you’re going to do,” You leaned forward and took his face in your hand, “You’re going to go up there, thank Pryce for his words about you. Then, mention how much this company meant to your father and how proud you were of him, and how proud he would be of you. Then say something about how much you love the company, how much it means to you and the world of medicine, blah, blah, blah. Then round it out with something light hearted, maybe make a joke? Then you’re done, you’re out of there.” 
“Are you sure that’s enough?” 
“It’s gonna have to be.” 
Roman nodded, before crushing the remainder of his cigarette under his dress shoe and pulling you into his side. You both sat in silence as you listened to the faint sound of Pryce’s speech. He was a well spoken man, which you knew made Roman nervous. 
“You know,” You said, breaking Roman from ruminating on what was to come, “I heard this couple talking shit about us.” 
“What?” Roman barked, snapping his head to look down at you. 
“Yep, when I was coming out to look for you, I heard them.” 
“What in the ever loving fuck did they say?” He fumes. 
“They were talking about how we were eye fucking each other all night, and how are PDA was inappropriate for the event.” You snort a laugh. 
“Who were they? Did you get a good look?” He was angry, you could feel it in the rigidity of his body. Your plan was working.
“Nah, just overheard them.” 
“Well, they better fucking hope I don’t find out who the fuck they are. Fucking rip their fucking eyes out for looking.” 
You giggle and Roman looks down at you again, anger and curiosity in his eyes. 
“I just love it when you get all riled up, it’s hot, baby,” You reach out to press a lingering kiss to his pulse point, “Love it even more than when you show everyone that I’m yours.”
Roman’s expression changes on a dime and pure hatred shifts into a sauve look of arousal, “Oh yeah?” 
“Yeah,” You hum, leaning to give more kisses to his throat, “I love how your hands feel on me, love that everyone can see, love how possessive you are, baby.”
A moan rips from Roman’s chest and he quickly grabs you and forces your legs around his hips to straddle him, “You like it when I show everyone you’re mine, huh?” 
He subtly bucks his crotch into your own and you whimper at the contact, “I love everything you do to me, baby.” 
His lips descend on yours once more, but this kiss is anything but soft. It’s hot and passionate and intense and fucking raw. His teeth clanging against your own, his tongue pushed deep in your mouth, both his hands groping your breasts. He occasionally broke apart from you to curse or to whisper an obscenity. You loved when he got like this, and you knew he needed it. He needed to feel in control, he needed to feel desired and strong. He needed to know he was still powerful; a protector. 
“You wanna know what you’re gonna do?” You moan, pushing his face to mouth at your neck.
“What, baby?” He asked breathlessly as he covered your skin in filthy kisses.
“You’re going to go out there, and fucking nail this speech. Show them that you’re the fucking boss, that you are in charge. That you own them and this fucking company. And you’re gonna do it knowing that I am in the audience, watching you, waiting for you to take me home and fuck me so good I can’t see straight.” And you pulled him away from you. 
His pupils were blown, his mouth red and kiss bitten and he panted as he gazed at you. 
“What the hell? Your plan was to give me blue balls then throw me on stage?” 
“A little, but mostly make you remember who you are. Roman Godfrey, the most powerful man I know, the only man who gets me soaked in seconds.” 
“Damn right I am,” He kisses you hard once more before you pull him off again. 
“Now go give your speech so we can go home,” You patted his shoulders firmly then stood from his lap. 
“I fucking hate you, you know that?” Roman complained, standing as well. 
But he didn’t, he really fucking loved you. Because somehow you knew every part of him, every nook and cranny of his twisted brain, every emotion and feeling before he had it. You knew him, and you always knew just what to do. He had been preening at your earlier praise and then fully immersed in your kiss and had totally forgotten about the speech altogether, along with his nerves. You had pumped up his ego with acclaim and hot touches and suddenly he wasn’t so scared anymore. Because all those stupid fucks out there, they didn’t matter. Like him or not, he owned this company, he owned them. They would learn to fear him, to want to be him, and that was something Roman knew was true (something that you had helped remind him). He fucking loved you so much, for always knowing what to do when he felt lost and helpless in the dark. Roman knew that taking over Godfrey Industries was the first in many steps he would take for the rest of his life to take care of you, and guide you through the blackness when you needed it.
“Sure you do,” You laugh.
“I’m supposed to go up there with this? You gonna let that happen?” He gestured to the bulge in his pants. 
“Think about baseball.” You shrugged and started back to the ballroom. 
Roman groaned loudly before catching up to you. 
As you both came through the double doors to the event, Pryce seemed to just be finishing up, catching Roman’s eye in relief that he hadn’t bounced. You reached down and gripped his hand as Pryce introduced Roman and gestured him to the stage. 
His face fell as all eyes moved to him, but you were there to plant a strong kiss on his lips and whisper, “Just giving that couple somethin’ to talk about.” 
Roman couldn’t help the cocky smile that spread over his face after that. He walked to the stage and you took your seat at one of the head tables. 
Roman cleared his throat and shook his blazer over his shoulder to resettle it as he looked out over the sea of his new employees. The sea of his new employees and you: who gave him an excited thumbs up and a wink. 
And Roman knew this would be a piece of cake. 
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i really hope you enjoyed!! if you did, i would love to hear any and all feedback <3 also, bear with me for a while, i am not sure when my next story will be out bc the ones i have working on rn are kinda long, but! until next time (:
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pastelwitchling · 3 years
Text
brittz-2123 asked:
I have a half assed attempt at a prompt? Because I love everything you wrote so I just have a vague idea. Anything where Kyle and Michael are at odds about Alex. Alex is in the hospital and best friend vs "boyfriend/not quite boyfriend" over who should take care of him during recovery. Michael not liking how touchy Kyle and Alex are. But again I don't have good ideas and literally EVERYTHING you write is amazing... you ALMOST make me like Forrest, almost.
***
Michael’s knuckles as he gripped the hospital bed railing were white. He’s fine, he reminded himself. He’s okay. He’s alive. He’s fine.
Alex brought his arm down from where he’d had it draped across his eyes and raised a brow at him. “Guerin.”
“Yeah,” Michael straightened. “What do you need? Water? A snack? I could go get you some food from the cafeteria.”
Alex stared. “I need you –”
“I need you, too –”
“—to unclench,” he finished.
Michael swallowed, and he nodded, trying very hard not to let his eyes wander to Alex’s leg. Two whole weeks on his prosthetic had done a number on Michael’s airman, leaving his skin red and purple with an infection and swelling like a balloon. Nobody had noticed until Kyle, for the first time in those weeks, made it to the bunker. His eyes had lingered on Alex, and he’d caught his arm just as he’d stumbled.
“Damn it, Manes,” he’d sighed, encouraging Alex to lean against him. “What’d you do to yourself?”
Alex had insisted he didn’t need a hospital, and proceeded to limp back to his seat before Michael caught him by the waist and demanded he get in his truck.
Now he was standing at Alex’s bedside where Alex lied, still in his jeans and jacket, which must’ve been making him even more uncomfortable, though he’d refused to change. Alex tried to look calm, but Michael saw the way he winced every so often, as if just breathing was worsening the pain in his leg.
He hadn’t realized his eyes had wandered down again until Alex cupped his jaw and made him meet his eyes.
“Unclench, Guerin,” he said, amused. Michael covered Alex’s hand with his own and turned his face into Alex’s palm, kissing him. Alex looked startled, but Michael hung on. He opened his mouth to say something, though he didn’t know where to start, but then –
“Two weeks!” Kyle walked into the room and tossed the clipboard down on the end of Alex’s bed. “You’ve been without your prosthetic for how many hours in that time?”
Alex’s head fell back as he seemed to try to remember, and Kyle clenched his jaw. “This is not a thinking question, Alex. I’ll give you the answer right now; none. Never. I’m willing to bet my diploma you never took it off once.”
“I do have to shower without it, you know,” Alex said, and Kyle glared.
“Glad you think this is so funny because you’ll have a lot of time to come up with jokes when you’re bedridden for the next month.”
Alex nodded, unsurprised, but Michael’s eyes widened. “Month?! It’s that bad?”
“Yes,” Kyle said at the same time that Alex assured him, “No.”
“Look,” Alex defended, “you have any idea how many times my superiors have told me that I’d be out of action for half a year? Sometimes longer? Two weeks later, I’m fine. They’re always saying crap like that so you’re careful, but I don’t need to be careful.”
“Well,” Kyle said coolly, “luckily for you, what you think you need doesn’t matter because I’m going to be looking after you for the next couple of weeks.”
Michael frowned. “What?”
“And don’t think I haven’t already devised a whole check-up schedule,” he went on, heedless of Michael’s anger.
“I’m going to take care of Alex,” he blurted, and both Kyle and Alex looked to him with raised brows, stunned. His cheeks burned, but he forged on, “I know him better than anybody, and I have the powers to keep him still for a month. What’re you going to do, pump him with anesthetics?”
“God help me,” Kyle said, “if that’s what it takes.”
“You two do realize you’re talking about keeping me physically contained, right?” Alex said mildly. “That won’t go well for either of you.”
Kyle met Michael’s eyes, and they knew they could agree on one thing; forcing Alex down would be impossible. But that didn’t change the fact that Michael knew him best, that he knew how to keep Alex happy and comfortable, that he would do anything Alex needed him to do.
“How’re you going to take care of him?” Kyle demanded. “Do you know how to manage an infection? What medication he needs, when he needs them? What to do if the swelling suddenly gets worse which could definitely happen because he’s Alex and we all know he won’t rest like he should?”
Alex held up his hands. “I’m right here.”
“What about you?” Michael snapped back, keeping pressed to the bed’s railing. He felt like if he had to be any further away from Alex, he might get sick. “When will you have the time to look after him? You’re a surgeon, remember? You guys aren’t exactly known for your extensive vacation days!”
“Guys –”
“No offense, Guerin,” Kyle huffed, “but you guys have been dating a month, he’s been sick for two of them, and you didn’t notice. He needs someone who really knows him.”
Michael smirked bitterly, trying not to show how hurt he was by that little truth. “I’m not leaving his side, so if you wanna get rid of me you’re gonna have to stab me with pollen.”
“Guys –”
Kyle scoffed. “I’ve carried an extra one with me for just this moment, please – I am actually begging you – give me a reason –”
“GUYS!” Alex snapped, and he winced and doubled over, clutching his leg. His outburst had apparently shaken him a bit too roughly and he’d pulled something because his fingers were digging into his knee and his breathing was ragged.
Michael’s anger faded at once, as did Kyle’s, and he put his hand on Alex’s shoulders. “I’m – I’m sorry, baby –”
“It’s okay, Alex,” Kyle helped him lie back again. “We shouldn’t have gone off like that, just relax, okay?”
“I don’t need . . . anyone to look after me . . .” His words were labored, his breathing heavy. “I am . . . perfectly capable . . . of taking care . . . of myself . . .”
Kyle shook his head. “Alex, you –”
“I know,” he huffed. “I got myself into this in the first place, but . . . I don’t want to do any more damage. I shouldn’t have let it get this bad. I can work from home, but I’ll rest when you tell me to, and take all the medication the nurse gives me like a good little patient, okay?”
Kyle pursed his lips. “You better mean that, Alex, or I swear I will pin you down and force those pills down your stomach.”
Alex gave him a small, indulgent smile. “Sure.” He looked to Michael. “And I’ll call you every night, no matter how tired I get, and let you know how I’m doing.”
Michael shook his head. “No, you won’t call.”
“No, I will, I promise –”
“I’ll see you,” he said, and both Kyle and Alex blinked. Michael’s cheeks burned but he finished, “Every night. I’ll let myself in, I’ll see you, make sure you’re okay.” He shook his head. “I won’t be able to sleep until I do, Private.”
Alex nodded slowly, starting to smile. “So you’ll check in on me, then just leave?”
Michael held his gaze. They both knew Michael wouldn’t be going anywhere, but neither felt the need to say it when their eyes made all the promises of dark nights and gentle hands and rustled sheets.
Kyle, however, seemed to hear it all anyway, and he rolled his eyes. He grabbed his clipboard and made his way to the door. “I still say you can do better.”
***
I’ll get there with Forrest... you just wait...
But yay! I did it, five whole prompts in one day! And, luckily, I’m very, very happy with all of them ❤ I will be posting them to ao3 over the next few days. Thank you so much to everyone who submitted prompts, I’m so sorry if I didn’t get to yours, but there are plenty more malex works coming up! I still have the third chapter of Remembrance, another project, and another few secret stuff I’ve been working on that I can’t talk about (yet). Thank you for your continued support, it means so much, and I hope you enjoyed reading these little fics today ❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
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Work of Art (Diego Hargreeves x Reader, Kinktober
A/N: Rather than try and finish 2 more fics this week, as would be necessary to finish the original Kinktober list I posted, I played a little shuffle, and combined the two remaining ones, tossed some stuff, added new stuff. Because frankly I’m running out of steam[iness], though really, this is further than I ever expected to get on this project. Anyway...the final fic. Hope you enjoy. Word Count: 2440 Kinktober Prompts: bondage, knife-play, marking Rating: E(xplicit) Content Warnings: dom/sub (dom reader), bondage, knife-play, marking kink, pain kink, begging, teasing, praise kink, oral (both male and female receiving), biting, blood, overstimulation Cross-posted to AO3 here.
“Stop squirming so much,” you laughed, dropping the soft cotton rope to start over. “You’d think I was torturing you or something.”
“You’re sitting there, dressed like that, looking that gorgeous, and not letting me touch you,” Diego pointed out. “Find me the part that isn’t torture.”
You rolled your eyes, finally securing the last knot to keep Diego exactly where you wanted him, despite his continued wriggling.
“Unless you want actual torture, stop complaining.”
“Actual torture? You couldn’t if you tried.”
You raised a challenging eyebrow and smirked. He swallowed, instantly regretting his words. 
“Well then, you wouldn’t mind if I just…” you walked over to the bedroom door, pausing dramatically in the doorway to look back at him. “Left you there then?”
“Wait, no, Y/N,” he called after you, voice straining with ill-concealed desperation. “Please. I promise I’ll behave.”
You waited a few beats longer, until you heard his faint whine, pleading for you, before you returned to the bedroom, satisfied that he knew your threat was serious. When you returned, he gave you his best penitent expression, which was admittedly, just a little bit ruined by the way his eyes trailed hungrily over your figure in the lacy, nearly see-through negligee you wore when he thought you wouldn’t notice.
“I could do whatever I want to you like this,” you observe off-handedly, still standing near the end of the bed, studying his bound form. 
He wasn’t completely immobile, though you had originally tried to convince him to let you trap him in that way. But he was tied enough that he wouldn’t be going anywhere or able to pull his usual stunts to try to take control. And he looked so pretty: stretched out on the bed, hands bound above him with just enough slack to be able to twist and grab the thin wrought-iron rails supporting him, another thin set of ropes wrapped around his waist and secured to the underside of the bed. If you were being honest, it was a bit like the damsel tied to a railroad track in an old silent movie, but it was a look that worked for him, especially the way the blue ropes stood out against his skin. 
“And you’d like that wouldn’t you,” you purred, taking a few steps closer. “You like to act tough but really, you’re just craving to be used and controlled. Isn’t that right baby?”
His cock twitched at your words and you couldn’t help but smirk, enjoying the visual evidence of your effect on him. He nodded in answer to your question, even as he strained against his binds. You stopped, waiting expectantly for him to use his words. It had taken a long time to convince him to let his guard down and be vulnerable like this, and you wanted to be sure that he was both capable and willing to bring it to a stop if he needed to.
“Yes,” he finally panted. “Please, use me, do whatever you want to me. Please, Y/N.”
“You look so good like this, like a work of art. What would you do if I decided I wanted to just sit here,” you plopped yourself down on a stool in the corner and folded one leg over your knee, leaning forward so you could still see his face. “And admire the art?”
He shook his head. “No, please, please touch me, hurt me, fuck me. Do anything, just please, do something.”
“You’re so right.” You stood again, sauntering to the edge of the bed and staring down into his face, gently running your nails down the side of his face, swiping them across his lips, drawing back harshly enough that they caught when he tried to suck a thumb into his mouth.
“My pretty boy.” He shivered bodily, as much as the ropes would allow, at your words, throwing his head back against the pillow.
“Do you like that? Being called pretty or being called mine.”
His face flushed and you repressed a giggle.
“Both,” he admitted shyly. 
“Do you want me to keep doing it?”
“Please?”
“Of course, my pretty boy, all mine, all laid out and gorgeous for me.” A dangerous glint crossed your eyes as he tried to buck upward, a bead of pre-cum welling from your words alone. 
“Maybe, I should make sure everyone knows that you’re mine. Make it clear that they can look,” you ran your fingertips down his sternum, “but they can’t touch. Would you like that?”
You suspected that by the end of the night, he would grow tired of your prompting. And yet, if he paid attention, he would see that through this, he had more control than he ever did otherwise. 
“Yes, Y/N. Claim me.” There was a hint of frustration and desperation in his voice, and you decided not to push him any further before giving in. 
Slowly, making sure his eyes were trained on you the whole time, not that he had dared to look away for a second so far, you straddled him, just above where the ropes crossed his mid-section, moving at a pace that made tectonic plates look like speedboats. 
Settling comfortably, you leaned down, pressing your body against his, only the gauzy layer of your dress separating you. You let your breath ghost over him, teasing at the sensitive spots behind his ear and beneath his jaw. And then, sure that he wouldn’t be expecting it, you dipped your head lower and bit down harshly on the soft spot where throat met clavicle. Diego cried out, thrashing under you but unable to move, and just as importantly, not seeming like he was actually trying to get away from you. You felt the slightest hint of blood welling up and laved your tongue over the spot, soothing the worst of the sting but maintaining enough pressure to draw the blood toward the surface, ensuring a heavy, dark spot would be left behind.
“Mm,” you purred, pulling back to look at his face once more, the blissed out look on his face sending a jolt to your core. “You mark up so well for me Diego, but I don’t know if that little spot’s going to be enough.”
He gulped nervously. “Will you leave another?”
“I had a better idea, if you trust me…” you forced him to meet your gaze. 
“Absolutely.” It was the firmest his voice had been since you began. 
Hesitantly, you reached over to the nightstand, picking up one of the tiny precision blades that he used sometimes, though never in this way obviously. Palming it, you held it up for him to see. His eyes widened. 
“I promise, I won’t hurt you, not really,” you explained, dropping any act or pretense. “Lightest touch only. Just enough to leave a mark that will heal over without a trace. Or I can put this away. It’s up to you.”
His eyes flickered back and forth from the knife to your face. 
“Do it,” he said, voice gruff with desire. The muscles of your cunt clenched and fluttered at the sound, but you tried to ignore the feelings and focus on him. “...please?”
You kissed him passionately, trying to pour into it all of the thousand feelings coursing through you: how badly you wanted him, how much you loved him, how grateful you were that he trusted you like this. 
You rocked backwards, letting your ass brush teasingly against his straining erection as you inspected your canvas.
“Now, my pretty boy,” you taunted, “where shall I make my mark. There are so many options…”
You trailed the flat of the little blade along the column of his throat, watching his Adam’s apple bob, dangerously close to the point. You traced outward, first over one side of his collarbone and then the other and then down over the taut muscles of his chest. He hissed as you turned the blade so that the needle-sharp point was against his flesh as you traced circles around his nipples with just enough pressure to create a sting. Finally, you stopped, poised just above his heart.
“Shall I write my name right here?” you asked, “label your heart and lay my claim to it.”
“It’s yours,” he countered, “already yours.”
“Well then, let’s make it official.” 
You turned the blade again so that the full edge was pressed his exposed skin, biting your lip as you watched the little specks of red well up in the shape of your initials, tracing over them once, twice, thrice. He moaned louder with each pass, high and needy and threatening to overwhelm you, but he held himself perfectly still, one wrong move potentially spelling his end. You admired the endurance and discipline it required almost as much as you admired the patterns of pain you were tracing around the letters now, little hearts and swirling shapes. You followed behind the knife with open-mouthed kisses, as you wanted him to experience the sting and ache at the same time as you wanted to draw them away and spare him any suffering.
“Please,” he breathed. “Please, haven’t I been good?”
You looked up, a little startled at the question. 
“Of course you’ve been good. You’ve been so good. Perfect, obedient, beautiful. You’ve been all those things Diego,” you assured him. 
“Then please, I can’t take anymore. Please stop teasing me, no more games.”
You frowned. It wasn’t the safeword you had agreed to, but maybe…
“Please, don’t I deserve a reward?”
Oh.
“Of course you do baby. Do you want to cum now?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“No?” you startled. 
“No. I don’t want to cum yet. Not until I taste you. I know you’re wet, I know you. I want that sweet little pussy all over my face.”
“Well who am I to refuse you whatever your heart desires?” You said, eyes sparkling with mirth before you rose up on your hands and knees, crawling over him until you were poised, hovering just out of reach of his tongue, which was already darting out to run across his lips. 
His hands strained at the ropes, and you knew that if his hands were free, something you could have given him with a few flicks of the little knife if you wanted to, they would be gripping your hips with bruising strength and holding you down while he pleasured you. You closed your eyes, letting the image dance across your eyelids while you sank down. 
Diego’s tongue flicked through your folds, tasting your gathered wetness. The groan that followed vibrated up through you, and it took all of your willpower, and the sharp bite of your nails into the palm of one hand, the other braced on the headboard, parallel to Diego’s own arms, not to break from that sensation alone. He sucked hard on your sensitive clit and you keened, grinding down on his face just as he moved his attention, tongue diving into you. You continued to move, hips bucking in rhythm with the thrust and flick of the wet muscle inside you, his name falling from your lips like a prayer and then in a primal scream as he flicked and sucked at your clit again, alternating back and forth faster than you could keep track of. He answered each sound you made with one of his own, groans and moans and hums mixing with his clever mouth to drive you over the edge, and then again without warning as he refused to let up. 
“Oh fuck!” you cried out, “Fuck, Diego, yes! You make me feel so good baby!”
As a third orgasm tore through you, you pulled from him, trembling in the aftershocks as you tried to catch your breath.
“That was so good baby,” you panted. “You always know how to make me feel so good. But now it’s your turn.”
You slowly slunk down the bed, trailing kisses and little nips along his skin until you reached your destination. Looking up to check on him, and because you knew how much he loved the sight of you making eye-contact as you sucked him off, you wrapped your lips around his dick and slowly lowered your mouth onto it, taking him as deep as you could until he bumped at the back of your throat and tears stung at the corners of your eyes. Curling your hand around the base of him, the other bracing yourself against his thigh, you set an unstable pattern, working him rapidly, twisting your fingers and bobbing your head up and down only to suddenly slow, so that you were all but still, holding him in your mouth and the length of his cock with your tongue and then resuming your motions, trying to keep him on his toes. He bucked his hips as far as the ropes would allow him, trying to match your patterns with thrusts of his own, and crying out your name over and over. 
“Oh, Y/N,” he moaned. “I’m so close. I’m so fucking close.”
You squeezed gently on the base of his cock at the same you hollowed out your cheeks, taking him as deep as you could and he came with a feral growl, his cum filling your mouth, hot and salty and you swallowed down as much of it as you could, fighting the urge to gag. 
Slowly, you slid him out of your mouth and stood. Your own fluids were rapidly cooling on the insides of your thighs as you made your way shakily to the bathroom for some warm cloths to clean you both up.
As you returned to Diego’s side, you noticed the way he shivered and sweat. Concerned, you quickly slit the ropes, freeing him to curl in on himself.
“Diego, baby?” you asked softly, stroking the damp fabric over his skin soothingly. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” he said slowly, sounding hoarse and slightly out of breath. “That was just a lot…”
“Too much?” 
“No. No,” he shook his head, reaching around to grab one of your hands in his. “It was perfect, I’m just…I’ll be fine.”
You bit your lip, not sure if you believed him and concerned that you’d gone too far, all in the name of showing him how amazing he was.
“How can I help?” you asked, wanting to follow his lead and speed his recovery.
“Just, hold me, please.”
“Let me finish cleaning us both up, and then I can definitely do that,” you said with a smile, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. “I love you, Diego.”
“I love you too, Y/N.”
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scone-lover · 3 years
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Happy Birthday to Holding Out For a Hero!!! ❤️
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art by @subparselkie
I published the first chapter of my longest and most popular fic just about a year ago! And I bet you always wanted to see some shitty outlines. Right? Just giving the people what they want. My brain is chaos and now you all have to be subject to it. Strap in, boys. 😂 Everything’s below the cut!
Read Holding Out for a Hero on AO3
This fic was born because I saw a tumblr post about a hero and villain who are roommates and I just had to Snowbazzify it. I had so many random ideas in my brain, and I’d been engaging with fan content for the CO fandom for a few months now.
So I started off by opening a blank document and writing the Prologue, featuring Shep. I had a few basic facts in mind: Shepard’s a reporter, Simon’s a hero, Baz is a villain, Mage is an evil mayor. And that’s. Literally it. I made it up as I went along. I actually still do that with fics, even though I do try to outline in more detail now—I have to write a scene or two that’s been bouncing around in my head to get a feel for the story, then I can give it a direction.
The document is 337 pages on google docs, LOL. 
Here’s the first ever set of notes I had. I wrote this on March 29, 2020, directly after typing out the Prologue! 
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Like I said, absolute chaos. The third Simon bullet point originally said something like “also I’m a superhero and only Penny knows,” then the following day I changed it to “but he’s so handsome? what do???” 
I didn’t publish the prologue until writing 5-6 additional chapters, but I think the only major change was going from Baz being “The Vampire” to just “Vampire.”
Chapter 1 was originally called “not a bloody avenger” before I decided to do the rhyming thing. I actually decided that because I wrote “counter spray and earl grey” down for chapter 2, unintentionally rhyming it, and then @ashspren-writes was like, “you should make them all rhyme”... so I did. 😂 For 25 more chapters.
I have a section labeled “quickie backgrounds” in which I finally sat down halfway through writing Chapter 2 (the blade/vamp fight) and said to myself, okay, maybe they should have backstories or something. Or like, reasons for being the hero and villain. Right, yeah, those would be good to make this into a coherent story. In the first version of that, Simon was a sports coach on the side, not a baker, and Baz was an English teacher. LOL. 
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Once I had all that, I literally just wrote for four days. There’s a weird kind of magic to your first-ever fic for a fandom. All your ideas and thoughts and wishes for these characters comes to a head as you suddenly have an outlet for the first time. It’s why I think people’s first works are often their best or most creative or most profound. The first couple chapters took some time and a couple 1am epiphanies, but once I got into a rhythm it was quick going. I wrote a lot of it in a linear manner, but after writing the first Simon/Baz scene (watching the news together in the flat), I doubled back and added Simon going to Penny’s house after meeting the Mage so that I could work her in as a character earlier.
Fast forward to April 5, I had 5-ish chapters written? I thought this fic would have like... 10 total. And be less than 20k. Haha. Ha. I asked @ashspren-writes to beta read for me - I’d been bouncing ideas off her since the beginning - and then I started brainstorming titles. 
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The list actually started with that second one. It took a whole 24 hours to decide on the final title. 😂 I thought it might be too cheesy. But hey, it worked out -- now I can’t open AO3 without the damn song getting stuck in my head. 
I worked a LOT with my friend @ashspren-writes on this fic - we were friends long before fandom, and she was the only person I knew at the time who had read CO and was involved in the fandom. I didn’t even have a tumblr at this point, I interacted mostly through Instagram and AO3!
On April 6, right before I posted, I realized that if I was going to actually put this on AO3 I should probably know where the story was going. So I made sure Chapters 1-6 were complete, then I wrote one bullet point per chapter up until 12 or so -- you can read those below.
Then I texted ashspren THIS mess:
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Some silly notes:
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Then I have a section that says “Why do they even have roommates?” because it was a few chapters in and I hadn’t justified richboy Baz and superhero Simon... living together. Cool cool cool
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I also did this cool little writing experiment I want to share. Remember that line in Fangirl that’s like—“Once Cath wrote what she thought was a swordfight, and Wren turned it into a love scene.” (Or maybe it was the other way around? LOL.) Anyway, there’s swordfights in this, AND love scenes, so I wanted to do a play on that for two alternate ways Simon might figure it out.
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I have a huge Deleted Section in which I wrote an alternate version of Simon and Baz finding out about their secret identities. I have one version where Baz figures it out first—it’s a very tropey yet angsty scene where Simon comes home totally wrecked from a fight, and Baz realizes as he’s helping with the wounds that he caused them. I actually like it a lot, but it ended up not quite fitting with the vibe of the fic (and I rather like them finding out through kissing better). :) I also had an idea where Simon figures it out because Vampire smells like cedar and bergamot, but it really just wasn’t interesting enough. 😂
Now onto... Outlines. 
I say that hesitantly because I think these are literally a disgrace to outlines everywhere. These are the baby ones I wrote on April 6 right before posting. Some are more detailed than others, clearly...
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Gotta live up to my username somehow. 
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We do love to see it. ​
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I love this next one: 😂 CHAOS, SCONEY.
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THEN, I wrote this as a very long text to ashspren, when I realized no sconey, this is not going to be under 20k words. LOL. 
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And then I did A Dumb Thing and I put it on AO3, having absolutely NO CLUE WHERE THE STORY WAS GOING. 😂 
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This is my favorite heading on the document.
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Another one of my favorite notes in there.
This next part wasn’t even divided into chapters yet, it’s just a word vomit. I’m so sorry you have to read this mess.
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Hahaha, once upon a time there was angst in this story. 😂 
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And then I realized my true calling: bakery fluff.
Then and only then, I actually decided to divide into those things called Chapters. This is the point where I made the admission to mr scone (boyfriend, not husband lol, we just call him that) that I write gay fanfiction, whoops, and can he please help me because he’s a HUGE DC comics fan and knows everything. And of course, he was super chill about it, and he did. He really did. He’s the genius behind Egghead!!! And also the entire Mage-Humdrum-Supercomputer/Politics plot. I’m serious. I did none of that.
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I can’t even say I’m trying anymore. “Flort”??? I AM LITERALLY NOT TRYING.
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Why yes sconey, so very specific. 😂 
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This is what qualifies as a “good” outline for me, that heading was just for my betas. Isn’t it fabulous to see that some of this actually made it in and I’m capable of planning in advance? 😂 
Get ready for the shock of your life, though -- I actually have a SUUUUPER detailed outline for the two finale chapters. Because, well, it’s the finale. Wrapping up loose ends does actually require planning, WHO KNEW. Also I’d been writing and posting for a couple months at this point and it had been several more weeks in quarantine so maybe I’d regained some sense of reality? It’s like two pages but still shittily written, so I’ll just share a couple tidibits.
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That bullet point is extraordinarily cracky BUT actually, Baz shooting up from the cloud like an awesome fucking hot dramatic person was one of the very first scenes I envisioned for this fic :D 
I hope you enjoyed this glimpse into my writing brain! It’s a terrifying place. I love all of you that say Holding Out For a Hero is a well-crafted masterpiece, but respectfully, no ❤️ 
(Though I swear I AM super, super happy with how it turned out - it’s still my favorite thing I’ve ever written. Read it here!!!)
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i stumbled upon ur writing looking for lady d x non-binary reader fics and ur work has just been a godsend i’m obsessed. it’s inspired me to start writing my own even though i’ve never written for fandoms before. i’ve never written for other actual characters before either so i was wondering if u could spare any tips for writing for lady d and her daughters? 🙏🏻
:D
I can certainly try! I'll divide the tips into lil sections for each characters. Might be less tips, more character observations that help me figure out how to write them? Putting under read-more for length. Also! If you ever want someone to look over what you write before you post it, I offer my services! I can't guarantee how fast I can respond, but I've been editing/proof-reading/giving general feedback for my friends for years, with everything from fanfiction to college level essays.
Alcina:
Large and in charge, literally. Regardless of the situation, Lady D wants to stay in control, or at least look like she's in control. Okay, minor exception being anything involving Mother Miranda, since she's the one person Lady D has any real respect for. Otherwise, Alcina maintains a good grasp on any situation, looking for ways to put herself in control.
For example, she often uses her height as a means to establish dominance, even within RE8 canon. If you watch a video of the Four Lords meeting, Alcina stands up once she starts arguing with Heisenberg, towering over him in an attempt to intimidate. We also see the aforementioned exception in this scene, as Lady D sort of "shrinks" a little when Miranda responds.
As much as Lady D wants to be in control, she's not always actually capable of it. In the game, we see her struggle to contain her emotions, and often releases them in outbursts. Such as the infamous vanity throwing scene (god I love that so much). It can provide some nice contrast in scenes, having Lady D be so in control one moment, then as soon as she's behind closed doors she's letting it all out.
Uses the most old-fashioned language out of her whole family. It's kind of hard to describe how one goes about writing this way, but I recommend trying to find some journals that were written in the early 1900's and reading them. Or just some classic novels (not Moby Dick, tho, that one's a bit much, in my opinion). One thing I can say is occasionally swap contractions (can't, don't, I've, etc) for the full version of the word (cannot, do not, I have, etc). Something about that always makes dialogue feel older, though I can't really explain why. Whatever you do, just don't rely too much on using synonyms. Replacing common words with their cousins can make dialogue feel "fancier", but you often run the risk of unintended connotations (feelings, positive or negative, associated with a word) messing with how a text is interpreted.
Puts up a front/facade around most people, as part of her noble background and need for control, with words like "stoic" and "composed" coming to mind. Very rough with troublemakers, no mercy. But!!! So very incredibly soft with her family/loved ones. I've seen some people accuse her of "faking" her love for her daughters, but these people either played a different game than I did, or they can't read emotions as well as I can. Gentle touches when she's checking if her kids are okay, little glances and gentle nods for reassurance, pausing a chase just to help her daughters, etc.
Bela:
Wants to make her mother proud. Legally obligated to make her mother proud, because she's the eldest daughter. Not that I know how that feels, being the younger of two children. Regardless, Bela is the most well behaved of the daughters, even when her mother isn't around. However, she does resent this position to some degree, based on in game dialogue/dialogue files that are in the game but aren't used. Personally, I see her as someone who's willing to let certain things go in exchange for favors/blackmail ammo.
Cleans up after her sisters a fair bit, sometimes literally. Feels responsible for them, to the point where their mistakes are her mistakes, and she's forced to compensate on their behalf. Because of this she ends up complaining a lot, though almost only when her family isn't around.
Still very protective of her family, she simply does most of her protecting behind the scenes. Knows how to manipulate a situation, which she probably learned from her mother, and can be quite convincing when she wants to be. Less likely to use violence to solve a problem than anyone else in the family. Will she use violence if need be, or if someone fucks up enough? Yes, absolutely, but she'll focus more on efficiency than misery (unless someone really fucks up).
Generally speaking she's more eloquent than either of her sisters, though not by much unless she's trying to impress someone (usually her mother).
Cassandra:
Two words: Angry. Horny. To her, they might as well be one word. Horngry. Cassandra struggles with her emotions more than either of her sisters, being a pressure cooker ready to pop basically all the time. It's not hard to set her off, but it can take ages for her to cool back down. Let's her frustration (of any variety) build up until she can bludgeon someone to death with it. Harshest on the servants, and spends the most time toying with others in the dungeon.
Like Bela, Cassandra wants to make her mother proud, but it's less of an obligation and more of a "I'm the middle child and feel like I don't get enough attention" type deal. Is more than willing to stoop to "tattle telling" activities in order to get the attention she craves. Usually sticks to obediently following her mother's orders or hunting down enemies, though.
Bit of an artsy type, and the most likely to take trophies from her victims. Gross ones, usually. Okay, well, that's debatable, but I'm talking about general consensus rather than my specific tastes. Personally, I don't care if she's got some weird blood paintings. Hell, I've got extra blood, and also am clumsy and bleed a lot anyway, she can have mine!
Hides her non-anger emotions as best as she can. Hates talking about her feelings (even if it helps), to the point where it's usually impossible to tell how she's feeling deep down. Remember, anger is a secondary emotion! No one is ever just angry, there's always something else hiding underneath, such as: Sadness, disappointment, loneliness, jealousy, etc. Keep this in mind when you're writing her. Make sure you pinpoint the center of her anger, and hint at it, letting her actions show her true goal.
Swears the most, easily. Tends to speak in shorter sentences than her sisters, and prefers being blunt to being eloquent/flowery.
Daniela:
Love, love, love, love, love, ahhhh deep breath... love. Loves love, or at least what she processes as love. Would do anything for romance. Except she also craves "natural" romance, creating a sort of paradox that adds to her delusions, as she engages in the pursuit of unintentional romance (not to be confused with "The Pursuit of Unintentional Humor", a song that I very, very much enjoy). Wants to be loved for who she is at the same time that she attempts to mold herself into a more lovable shape. Struggles with intimacy, wanting to feel vulnerable without actually being so.
On some level she understands that draining people of their blood, and then drinking said blood, is not equatable to a healthy relationship. But seeing as this is the most common form of supposed "intimacy" that she experiences, she refuses to acknowledge the true nature of what she does. Instead she clings to the idea of "forever bonding" with her partners, pretending that each one is still with her, even when she no longer remembers their names.
Hates being rejected, no matter how gently. "Ugly" cries, but only if she's alone, often turning her pain into anger, just like Cassandra. However, her outbursts don't seem to last as long. In reality, her breakdowns simply occupy the inside of her existence, rather than the outside. Sure, she's giggling and causing chaos, like usual, but on the inside she's breaking a record for most depressing internal monologue.
Reads a ton, but not always "quality" books. Goes through a dozen books or more a week, often rereading her favorites several times, mainly within the romance genre (obvs). This affects her speech a fair amount, making her both cheesy and occasionally smooth as hell.
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typewrittenluck · 4 years
Text
Sorry General
AN: Okay hehe this is my first time ever posting a fic so be nice :/. It’s basically just self-indulgent Obi-Wan angst-fluff because I miss him and I’m excited for the new show. This takes place during The Clone Wars, Season 2, Episode 10. But you don’t have to watch it to understand what’s going on. Anyways enjoy!
Word Count: 2130
Warnings: None, Anakin being a lil’ shit
(gif creds to owner)
General Grievous had escaped yet again. It seemed as if every time the Jedi came close to capturing the sleaze ball, he would slip right through your hands. You could sense the tension in the air as everyone onboard the landing craft shared your anxiety, which increased your frustration by every person that you could feel through the force. It of course didn’t help that you were sent down to capture Grievous with none other than Obi-Wan Kenobi, who always had a knack for making you agitated.
As soon as the ship's doors opened, you began to take long strides out, already beginning to scope out the area and make mental notes of factors that might be influential to your mission.
At General Kenobi’s command, you and the troops began to move towards the wreckage of Grievous’s ship in hopes of finding something that would lead you to the General himself. 
After scouting out the ship, Rex determined that the General couldn’t have been far off.
“We’ll split into teams. Rex, take Jesse, Hardcase, Kix, and Y/N and search those wetlands.” Obi-Wan said, gesturing vaguely in your direction.
“Actually, Kenobi,” you spat, “Seeing as I am a General, and therefore rank above Captian Rex, I will lead the troops to conduct a search of the wetlands.”
“Oh, right, of course General Y/N. I wouldn’t want to undermine your notable past with leading battalions and strategy missions.” His voice dripped with sarcasm.
“Why I ought to-”
“Excuse me, Generals, if I may,” Rex stepped in between you two. “we really shouldn’t get distracted from the situation at hand.”
“Yes, of course Captain.” you replied, still glaring at Obi-Wan. “We should get going”
“Right. Cody, you, Crys, and I will pick it up from here.” said Obi-Wan. “Oh, and one more thing,” he said, turning to face you. “If you get a visual on General Grievous, for the love of the force Master Y/N, make contact before you make any rash decisions to engage.”
“From the two of us, Master Kenobi,” you replied, “It is not I who have a track record of making rash decisions.”
Once you were out of earshot, Cody spoke up. “Forgive me General, but you seem worried. I’m sure that General Y/N and Rex are capable of handling this. They are both very wise individuals.”
Obi-Wan stroked his beard, apparently deep in thought. “Yes. Wise indeed.”
                                                  -----------------------
You felt a tug on the force and turned around just in time to see Rex get shot by a Commando droid. 
“REX!” you screamed, as you and the clones rushed over to him.
Jesse and Hardcase finished off the last few droids before joining the small crowd gathering around Rex. It was deemed that the safest plan was to find shelter for the night, so that Rex could heal.
You and the clones made sure that Rex was as comfortable as possible and well-taken care of in the barn that you had secured a place in before you hopped on your speeders and continued your search of the wetlands. 
“General, if it’s not too personal to ask, why do you and General Kenobi seem to fight about everything?” Jesse piped up after a little while.
“That is an extremely inappropriate question to ask your commanding officer soldier.” you snapped back.
“Right. Sorry.”
But it was too late. The question opened the floodgates that you worked so hard to keep closed. The overpowering emotions that you trapped behind a wall came rushing out and now, that was all that you could think about.
The constant questions. Why did Obi-Wan hate you? Why did he feel like you were inferior? Why is he so adamant that you shouldn’t be in charge of battles?
The constant anxiety. What if it’s a reflection of what the council thinks of me? What if everyone else feels that way too and they are just better at hiding it? What if I pass on my incompetence to my Padawan?
And above all, the crippling guilt. You were guilty because you felt responsible for him not liking you. You felt guilty because you broke the code. You felt guilty. Because you loved Obi-Wan Kenobi.
                                           ---------------------------------
Obi-Wan had been a Padawan for a mere two weeks, when a young girl from Dantooine had opened the doors to the Jedi temple, leading the way for an amused group of older Jedi. She had begun her training not long thereafter. On her first day, she walked into the training room and looked around, scoping out the area to decide where she would be comfortable. To Obi-Wan’s surprise, she picked a spot next to him. 
Since that fateful day, their friendship blossomed, mainly due to the fact that their masters, Qui Gon Jinn and Ki-Adi-Mundi, were good friends. Obi-Wan and Y/N became very close. Closer, in fact, than any member of the Jedi order should become to another lifeform. But it was inevitable. The two were so alike and their personalities clashed together perfectly, as if the force had made it so that the two would meet. All of the older Jedi sensed the rising emotions in the two young apprentices, and they felt the need to take preventative measures. So when a mission with an indefinite length popped up on the faraway land of Mandalore, the council saw it as the best opportunity to give the two a break from each other. They sent Obi-Wan on a year long trip to ensure the safety of Mandalores sovereign ruler, Satine Kryze.
Y/N spent her time away from her best friend meditating on her emotions, and came to the conclusion that she had fallen for him. It was against the code. It was against her plan. But she had fallen, and fallen hard.
Obi-Wan ended up with a similar conclusion, after realizing that his emotions towards Satine were anything but new feelings, and he had experienced those same emotions a hundred times stronger towards Y/N.
The problem was that the two apprentices dealt with their feelings in completely different ways. Y/N became awkward and always on edge, and Obi-Wan saw it best to cut her out of his life as much as possible.
Which led them to where they were now. Grown members of the Jedi order who were still harboring childhood crushes on each other, buried deep, deep down.
                                      --------------------------------------------
You were cut out of your train of thought by Obi-Wans voice.
 “Captain Rex, come in please.”
“This is Y/N, Rex was injured.” you replied, still a little dazed by your sudden surge of emotion.
“What’s his condition?”
“He’ll be fine, but we had to find him shelter for the night.”
“Grievous is on the move. We’re headed to the West.” said Obi-Wan. “Swing around and we can meet up at the final escape pod. We’re going to need all of the firepower that we can muster.”
“Alright, we’re on our way.” you said, sharply turning your speeder around as the clones did the same.
                                       --------------------------------------------
You arrived at Obi-Wans position just as you saw a ship attempting to land. You ran into the fray of flying bullets and disembodied droid limbs, jabbing and parrying with your lightsaber to get to Obi-Wan.
“Concentrate your fire on that ship!” he roared to the tanks.
He got distracted by his wrist-com and didn't see a laser ray coming straight at the back of his neck. 
“Keep firing. Don't let that ship land.” he said, as you jumped behind him, drawing your lightsaber to deflect the bullet. He seemed shocked by your sudden appearance.
“I believe a thank you, Master Y/N, is in order.” you dead-panned.
He rolled his eyes, but mumbled an unintelligible thanks.
“The guns are overheated!” you heard a clone say from his wrist-com.
“It’s always something.” Obi-Wan grumbled in response. “Cody, Jesse, cover me!”
“Wait!” you exclaimed after him. “Where are you- oh nevermind.” you sighed as you saw him speed towards Grievous. You sprinted after him, knowing that he would need help.
He began fighting the foul droid General, their battle just a blur of blue and green light.
Just as you arrived at the fight, Grievous was climbing up the side of the ship. “Forget trying to land.” he growled in his raspy voice. You, however, were preoccupied with Obi-Wan who was knocked to the side. He groaned as you knelt by him, reaching feebly behind you as you heard Grievous say “Fire the engines.”
He was lifted into the night sky, narrowly dodging clone bullets as he laughed maniacally. “Jedi scum!”
“Are you alright?” you asked him.
“No.” he sighed in frustration. “We’re right back where we started!”
He called back to Cody. “Call the cruisers, see if they can stop that ship! And tell them to send someone to pick us up.”
You sensed his frustration and heard the defeat in his voice.
“Obi-Wan,” you started tentatively.
“What?” he snapped, his anger evident.
“I know it seems like a total failure-”
“Oh but it is!” he cut you off with contempt. “I’ve lost countless troops, just trying to capture Grievous, and now he’s right there. And I let him slip right past my fin-”
“No!” you cut him off this time. “This kind of talk is what leads to anger. You and I both know that anger leads you down the path of the dark side. This isn’t your fault Obi-Wan.”
Calling him by his first name is what, over all the other things, seemed to get through his head. “You don’t,” he stopped, looking into your eyes. “Blame me?”
And in that moment, standing in an empty battlefield in the middle of Saleucami, you both knew that he was talking about much more than this lost battle.
“You’ve done all that you can do. You did what you thought was right.” you replied.
He opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Cody, saying that the transport had arrived to take you all back to the main ship. You two held eye contact for a brief moment before turning and heading in the direction that Cody had gone.
                                        ----------------------------------
You stood in the bridge, looking out of the enormous window with Admiral Yularen right beside you. A droid came up behind you two and tapped you on the shoulder.
“Jedi Master Y/N, Jedi Master Obi-Wan requests your presence.”
“How is he?” you asked.
“He is doing well! He has sustained only minor injuries and will heal very soon!” the droid replied chirpily.
“That’s a relief. Where does he want me to meet him?”
“His private quarters, I believe.”
“Top secret Jedi business, I presume.” chuckled Yularen as you blushed a bright red. You had a sneaking suspicion that this had nothing to do with the Jedi order.
                                     -----------------------------------
“Y/N.” He greeted you, bowing his head and using the force to close the door behind you.
“Obi-Wan.”
“I’m sorry.” he blurted, taking you a little by surprise by his bluntness. “I know that I confused you and I make you feel unwanted at times and I am the reason our friendship was ruined and I promise I have an explanation which is no excuse but you deserve to know why I-” he stopped rambling when he saw your raised eyebrows and caught himself. 
He took a deep breath before beginning again.
“I had a lot of time to think when I was on Mandalore. But I kept thinking about the same thing. You. I couldn’t stop. And it was all that got me through each day, the thought of your face, and your smile, and your laugh. But that’s against the code. And the only way that I could get over you was to cut you off. But it didn’t work because by the stars and the planets Y/N, I love you. I care deeply for Jedi traditions and maintaining the code, but I love you Y/N. I’m sorry.”
“Oh Obi,” you sighed, stepping closer to him. “I realized it same as you. We have been drawn to each other since we met. It’s almost as if the force wanted us to be. And every day since that day that you left for Mandalore, I have looked at the sunrise, hoping that one day, it will bring light to what we once had.” You placed your hand on his scruffy cheek and stroked his jaw as he leaned into your touch. “I love you too.”
He pulled you into a hug, burying his face into your hair as you wrapped your arms tightly around his waist.
“Master- Oh! Sorry!” Anakin walked in, making you and Obi-Wan leap to opposite sides of the room, both of you burning a bright crimson color. Anakin’s eyes darted between the two of you, a smirk growing on his face. 
“Not a word, Anakin.” Obi-Wan said sternly, already having an idea of the things that he knew that his former Padawan would say.
AN Again: I just really want a hug from this man 
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wonderofasunrise · 3 years
Note
32 or 61 for Kerry/Susan please ❤️
#61 - "I'm pregnant."
Okay, I'm letting the cat out of the bag now - I have a WIP, a passion project of some sorts in the form of a multi-chapter Kerry/Susan AU fic. I've been working on it on and off for months, writing whatever I can come up with out of order (a process which involves at least three different Google Docs files for notes etc and not-so-subtly tweeting about it every now and then), and I can't promise anything because I just...well, suck at planning things ahead especially when it comes to writing anything lengthy (unless it's an academic essay *laughs nervously*). Fingers crossed I will be able to post the whole thing someday - if and *only* if I manage to finish it in advance, because I love the idea so much I don't want to take the risk of posting it early and writing as I go along...only to (God forbid) abandon it. I don't want to give away too much, but hopefully you'll get the gist from this excerpt of one of the chapters I've managed to finish:
“Susan?” a voice calls me almost immediately as I step out of the cubicle. I look up in a swift move to find the source of the voice, and sure enough my head starts to spin again. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see none other than Kerry Weaver—her bright red hair kind of gives it away—with a very concerned look on her face, which I try my best to ignore.
Slowly, I make my way to the nearest basin, and just as my hand is about to turn the faucet another wave of nausea surges over me. Please do not vomit, please do not vomit, it was bad enough to storm out of a fucking trauma but to vomit in front of Kerry of all people…?
“Are you okay?” she asks just as my nausea passes, the tone of her voice as concerned as her expression. I know that at this point even saying a single syllable will bring back the nausea, so I simply nod.
“Are you sure? I was in the trauma room, and I was just as surprised as everyone else to see you storm out like that…”
“Yes, Kerry, I’m fine,” I suddenly snap, though immediately I can feel guilt lingering over me as I know Kerry is genuinely worried. Say what you want about her, the woman does care about the wellbeing of her colleagues (or employees? Whatever.). I glance at her while putting some water into my mouth, somewhat grateful that I don’t see any sign of her being offended. If anything, her expression grows even more worried, and I know that at this point there is nothing I say that can ease her concern.
“Okay,” Kerry says, seemingly giving in. “It’s just—you normally have the best composure of the lot, and I never expected a trauma to affect you that badly, that’s all…Susan? Can you walk?”
Her concerned tone returns as soon as she catches the sight of me dropping to my knees, no doubt thanks to me turning around too quickly after I finished my business in the sink. Instinctively one of my hands travels to my stomach, and I pray to all that’s holy that the gesture somehow goes unnoticed by Kerry, who is now kneeling next to me, her crutch abandoned, with one of her hands on my back.
“Can you stand up?” she asks in a tone that I would never expect Kerry Weaver to use when speaking to an adult. I nod, though I myself am not quite sure. I try anyway, with one of my hands still firmly on my stomach and the other holding onto Kerry for support. Once I get back on my feet, I let go of the other woman and I take a deep breath, relieved when no more sign of nausea kicks in. I try to make my way out of the ladies’ room, and I can feel Kerry’s eyes firmly on my back as I turn around—more carefully this time.
“You know, if you’re not feeling good, you can go home and rest,” she says. “I-I would hate to see you not in your prime at work, and more importantly it’s clear you really can do with a rest. We have a busy day ahead, and if you’re...feeling like you’re not up for it, you can go home. I can cover for you.”
I can tell she chose her words carefully, and she tried her best not to insinuate that I am not up for a busy day at work. Heck, she knows I’m more than capable—I’m one of her best attendings, after all, but still…who can really guess what Kerry Weaver actually means?
As for going home and resting, I can’t deny that I need it badly. I barely got any sleep last night, partly due to anxiety ahead of my appointment with Coburn this morning, and who can guarantee that I won’t storm out of another trauma? Still, part of me is trying to fight the urge to go home, because work is the best form of distraction I can think of and at home I know I will drive myself mad over everything, with no one to talk to and all.
“I’m pregnant,” I suddenly blurt out, the words coming out of my mouth far more quickly than I could comprehend. My eyes grow wide at the realization of what I just said, to Kerry of all people, and I try to avoid her eyes so much it’s ridiculous.
Unexpectedly enough, Kerry steps closer toward me, and she puts a hand on my shoulder. Just as unexpectedly, I find the gesture quite comforting, and God knows I have been deprived of comfort for far too long the last couple of weeks. It doesn’t feel as awkward as one would expect, coming from Kerry Weaver, and I sigh as I let her hand give my shoulder a gentle squeeze.
“How-how far along are you?” she asks in a tone that can barely conceal her surprise.
“Four weeks. I-I saw Coburn this morning,” I say with a shrug. She nods, and then lets go of my shoulder so that she can focus on looking me in the eye, which always makes for an interesting sight thanks to our significant height difference.
“In that case,” she states matter-of-factly, “You should go home and rest. I don’t want you to feel worse than you already do. Go home, get something to eat, and rest. I’ll cover for you for the rest of the shift.”
Now that sounds more like the Kerry Weaver that everyone knows and loves (though that part is still up for debate, I reckon). At this point I know there is no use fighting with her, so I nod and turn back to the door, silently hoping that somehow nobody will pay any attention.
“Kerry?” I mutter, suddenly remembering something important before we part ways. Letting her know of my pregnancy is bad enough (though it’s by no means a fault on her part); having everyone else know before I’m ready will be a disaster. I have enough on my plate at the moment, and the last thing I need is being the center of the latest ER gossip. “Um…thank you for letting me go home for the day, and I guess—well, I would really appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone. I have too much to deal with at the moment,” I say in a voice so low I will be surprised if she actually listens.
But apparently she did, because she nods and puts a hand on one of my arms and gives it a gentle squeeze—which, again, does not feel as awkward as one would expect coming from her.
“Of course,” she responds. “It’s not my call to let people know. It’s yours, and yours only. Don’t worry about it.”
And with that, I mouth a thank you before exiting the ladies’ room, trying my best to forget everything that has happened today. It’s not even noon yet, and too much has already taken place. Perhaps Kerry is right: I really can do with a rest.
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5lazarus · 3 years
Text
Cages: an post-canon ATLA fic
Mai visits Azula. It is not easy. Read on Archive of Our Own here.
They’ve left her in the care of chi-blockers less merciful than Ty Lee. Mai takes the palanquin to the barge and then another carriage to a small palace in the tea mountains. She is tired by the time she arrives, sick from the jostling of man and sea and horse, but determined to put a brave face on it all.
Katara said she’d come with her, since Ty Lee won’t; she doesn’t have to go alone. She didn’t have to go at all, in fact, and Mai worries leaving Izumi alone through the dizzying journey up the tea mountains, though she consoles herself knowing that Zuko is a more than capable parent. But in the long years since Zuko’s coronation, no one has been to seen Azula. Zuko is too busy, though he wants to go. Ursa, or whatever she calls herself, refuses. Mai goes, not out of mercy, but for her own need. She does not want Azula to remain a mystery, not for her, and certainly not for Izumi.
“Take me to my sister,” she tells the palace guard, a dead-faced burly woman with bandages wrapped tightly around her neck. That is what Azula is and has always been—her sister, more blood shared and shed than her own little brother. Izumi is her niece. They have the same dragon eyes. Azula is her sister.
The guard bows and says, “She’s been sedated for the high sun, my lady. The doctors advise we wait ’til night before rousing her.”
Mai says, “I’ve dealt with her in a temper during a comet. I can handle her at noon.”
The palace is not made of wood, that is the first thing Mai notices. Its walls protrude from the limestone cliffs almost like an Air Temple terrace. The household has been carved into the mountains themselves. The walls are richly painted, of course, and there is some charming animal sculpture, made of stone. Mai stops at a meditation garden made of sand and stares at the center, a piece of blasted obsidian.
The guard says, “My lady, be careful. It’s hot to the touch.”
Mai almost smiles, and follows the guard into the caves. In the anteroom of the princess’ personal rooms one of Ty Lee’s sisters stands guard, carrying a fire-proof robe. She bows. Mai inclines her head.
Ty Wu says, “It gets colder in here. For her own good. Wear this, just in case.” The guard shifts uneasily. Mai sniffs. She smells aloe vera, calendula, gotu kola. It’s familiar, Ty Lee’s own herbal remedy for Azula’s temper tantrums. She had always been careful not to leave scars; the ointment was always enough to make sure the burns didn’t fester.
Mai says, “Thank you,” and puts on the robe. She can still get her throwing knives, if need be.
Azula is kept in the dark in the brightest time of the day, away from the sun. The manmade cave is cool. Water beads through the limestone walls; Mai pauses and studies a dying fresco in the hall. A figure with long hair, profile partially obliterated, balances on a ball, hand in a teaching pose. With a start she realizes why this place looks like an Air Temple-style terrace: it was one. She reaches with her finger and touches where the master’s arrow should be. It seems appropriate that Sozen’s granddaughter should be kept in a prison of the Fire Nation’s own crimes. Doubtless Aang would disagree. She wonders who this is: Yangchen? Or another Air Temple sage, whose name has been burnt away?
Grimly she turns away from the wall. There is one more door, a heavy stone specially imported by the Earth Kingdom: cold granite, which could not be blasted as easily as the Fire Nation’s limestone. Ty Wu and Mai relax into a fighting posture. The guard, grunting, pushes the stone away.
At the center of the room, in the darkness, Azula drowses in her sedated sleep. They’ve dressed her in white—morbid, she looks like the corpse Katara should have left her. Mai wishes she had taken Karata up on her offer, to accompany her here, but she does has her pride, and Zuko would be upset that she brought her rather than him. But Zuko should not see his sister like this; what his mother did is bad enough. Mai can carry this for both of them.
Ty Wu says flatly, “I don’t recommend waking her. You should’ve waited ’til night. She’s safer then.”
Mai says, “Why did you dress her up like a corpse?”
Ty Wu shrugs.
Mai steps into the room. Azula opens one lazy dragon’s eye and says, “I’m not dead yet. And if I were, I’d have better taste than to haunt you.”
Involuntarily Mai smiles. Azula undulates, twisting herself into a sitting position. Mai fingers her knife. They’ve cut Azula’s hair short, but according to the reports that cross her desk before the Fire Lord’s, she asked for it to be done. She wants to look less like her mother. She cannot stop seeing Ursa in the mirror, and it was either that or a face tattoo.
Mai says, “It’s been a long time.”
“Oh yes,” Azula says. “Yes. So they tell me. You’ve settled in nicely as Fire Lady, I’ve heard. Newsletter from the capital.” She smiles sword-sharp. Ozai’s faction briefly attempted to rally around Azula’s legitimate claim, but they have been thoroughly discredited. Mai knows, she had the most stringent voice assassinated last week. They have not been in communication with the mad princess. No one is. Azula says, voice rising, “Well? Aren’t you going to sit?”
Mai waits for her eyes to adjust to the dark. A table hewn from stone sits before Azula’s bedroll. There are few decorations.
Azula says, “Oh, this is just where I sleep. Away from the light, like a badgermole. But I haven’t gone blind yet.”
Mai sighs. “How boring,” she says. She sits down and withdraws one of her knives. “You talk the same. Everything’s a threat, with you. Shame you can’t back it up.”
Azula says, “And you came here to gloat. How kind of you. Does my brother know? Tell little Zuzu I know his tricks. Sending you to…check on me isn’t going to work. I’m not like our mother. I’m not weak. I know who I am, and I’m never going to ask to take that away from me.”
Mai says, “I’ve heard Iroh came to visit. Did he make you tea?”
Azula scowls. “He brought his own. Chilled. I threw it in his face!”
Mai thinks, good for you. Drily she says, “He really does push those redemption narratives.”
“No,” Azula says. “He thinks I should be put down like a dog, and told me so. He’s stronger than Zuzu. He should’ve let that waterbender bitch do it, if he couldn’t do it himself. Or you.” She looks at Mai expectantly. “Have you finally come to put me out of my misery?”
“You don’t seem that miserable to me,” Mai says. “I’ll wait until you beg. And then, maybe.” She smiles as Azula begins to laugh. “Maybe, if you’re nice to me.”
Azula says peremptorily, “Where’s Ty Lee?”
“Far away from you,” Ty Wu says behind them. Mai shoots her a warning glance but she looks unrepentant, staring at Azula with an ugly look on her face. When Mai told Ty Lee she was visiting Azula, Ty Lee did not even respond. She just continued to chatter on about the tea Iron had sent the Kyoshi Warriors, which they had ceremoniously burned in front of the statue of the Avatar as a sign that they will never submit to Fire Nation flattery. Even though they had taken Ty Lee in.
Mai says, “I had a daughter. Your mother refused to see her, of course, and I won’t bring a baby to see you. But when she’s old enough to travel and think for herself, I’m going to bring her to look at you. To remember what the Fire Nation did to you. And I’m going to bring Katara too.”
Azula says, “Oh, now who’s talking threats? How good for you. What do I care about some mewling brat—I take it Zuko brought her to our father, too? I hope he spat on her! He was the runt of the litter and all he can produce is runts, he is leading our nation to ruin and you—“ She lunges at Mai, but Ty Wu darts in and stabs at her sixteen different chakra points. Azula’s face twists in anguish.
The guard says, “Ty Wu!” She rushes to catch Azula before she falls over the stone table, and places her back on the bedroll.
Mai has not even moved. Face stoney, she stares down at Azula, paralyzed in the dark.
Ty Wu says, “You should have waited ’til night to see her, my lady. She gets nasty in the afternoon.”
Mai says, “Oh, I know.” Pale she stares down at her. She says, “You don’t have any hold on me anymore, you get that? And your ghost isn’t going to haunt my daughter. What Ozai did—what Ursa did—it ends here. I won’t let this family fuck up my daughter the way they fucked up you.”
Azula’s eyes widen but she cannot move her mouth. Ty Wu grabs her roughly and leans her against the wall, and shoves a cloth into her mouth.
“So she won’t choke,” she says. “Or bite her own tongue. Not like she ever showed Ty Lee the same kindness.”
Mai snaps, “Be kind anyway.” She pivots, leaving Azula with that silent scream in her throat, and walks into the heavy sun.
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snowdice · 4 years
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Big Bang (Sort of) Editing Story [Day 49]
I started writing this fic while editing my Big Bang story, but am going to continue doing it for other things now that Kill Dear is out. I will write and publish 100 words of the story every time I finish doing whatever task I’m doing. If you’d like to block these proceedings, please feel free to block the tag proofread stories. I will reblog this post with the parts of the story I do today. Edited chapters are linked; everything else I’ve done so far is under the cut.
My Master Post Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18
I have a bit to edit right now. Not sure how much I’ll write on this, but I’ll do it for a while.
Chapter 20
Logan let out a slow breath as his father closed the door behind him. That could have been very, very bad. He turned his attention to Virgil and Patton. Patton had curled himself around Virgil as much as physically possible and had tucked the boy’s head under his chin.
Logan slowly rounded the bed and knelt in front of them. “It’s alright,” Logan said, cautiously moving to put a hand on his shoulder. Virgil didn’t pull away. “I asked him to leave. It’s alright.”
Virgil tilted his head slightly too look at him. Logan rubbed a circle into his back as he slowly got control of his breath.
 Logan smiled softly at him and reached out to touch his cheek with a gentle hand. “You… didn’t hurt him. You didn’t even try to hurt him.”
Virgil shook his head.
“Why not?” Logan asked curiously. “It was a perfect opportunity.”
“Promised Patton,” Virgil mumbled, and the idea that perhaps the thing that had saved his father’s life was a pinky promise just about gave Logan a migraine, but then Virgil ducked his head. “And it would make you sad.”
“I see,” Logan said, heart in his throat.
Virgil kept looking towards the floor, his eyes starting to fill with tears again. “Are you going to turn me in now?”
 He was shaking and barely holding back a fresh wave of tears. Logan knew of course that no one would hurt him here if he turned him in to his father and the guards, but he also knew that Virgil would be terrified if he did so. He was already terrified. Logan didn’t want to know what he thought the fate Logan would be condemning him to.
“No,” Logan said before he could even truly think it through. “No, I’m not.”
“You’re not?” Virgil asked.
“Well, there wouldn’t really be a point, would there?” Logan asked. “The reason we planned to turn you when father got back in is because you posed a danger to him, but you have just demonstrated that is no longer an issue.”
 “Really?” Virgil asked, sniffling a bit and Logan saw Patton’s arms tighten even more around him.
“We will have to figure out a better cover for you than just that you’re new to the castle, but I believe it will work fine. No one besides the two of us would ever guess your origin anyway.”
“S-so I can stay?” Virgil asked, “and you won’t throw me into prison or execute me?”
“I promise you were never going to be executed Virgil,” Logan said. “Even if we turned you in, but yes you can stay with us. We’ll figure out a backstory for you that doesn’t involve assassinations and you’ll have to keep up the lie, but I doubt anyone will question it.”
 “I’ll do whatever you want,” Virgil said, chocked up. “Thank you. I really didn’t want to go.”
“Well, you’re our friend now so there will be no going anywhere,” Patton said kissing him on the cheek. Virgil relaxed back into his hold, pleased with the affection.
Logan smiled at them both. “Can I see your wrists, Virgil?”
Virgil blinked but offered them and Logan tapped the restraints doing a quick incantation. They popped off after a moment.
“You’re letting me go?” Virgil asked, eyes wide.
“Of course,” Logan said. “We’re not just going to keep you prisoner for no reason.”
 “That’s…” Virgil said, eyes watering as he clearly was trying not to cry. “You’re the best people I’ve ever met.”
“I wish that was not so clearly the case,” Logan replied. He slowly reach up and set a hand on his shoulder. “I’m going to go speak with my father. Patton will stay with you.”
“Okay,” Virgil agreed, seeming a bit hesitant.
Logan smiled softly and leaned forward to gently touch their foreheads together. “I will be right back,” he assured. “We will finish our slumber party, though perhaps we will table the rest of the dress up activity for another night.”
 He stood then, leaving Virgil in Patton’s capable hands to exit his own bedroom and cross the hallway to his father’s. He took a brief moment to compose himself before knocking on the door.
“Come in,” his father called.
Logan opened the door to see his father sitting on one of the armchairs in his room. Despite the almost disaster that had taken place a few minutes ago, Logan found himself smiling at the man. It was nice to have him home.
“Sorry about that,” Father said.
“It was more my fault than yours. If I knew there was a risk of you coming home today, I wouldn’t have left him alone.”
 “Is he alright?”
“I believe so,” Logan answered. “Patton is with him and will certainly smooth out any lingering distress.”
“Good,” his dad said. “That’s good.” There was a pause and then he gestured at the seat beside his.
Logan settled himself down on it. “How was your trip?” he asked. “You’re back a week early.”
“Yes,” Father said. “The trip went better and worse than anticipated.
“How so?” asked Logan curiously.
“Well,” Dad said. “The purpose of the trip was to convince the new queen of Lamir, Cecil not to ally with Mocnejsi, but by the time I’d arrived there wasn’t really a risk of that.”
 “Why not?”
“After investigation, it turned out that Cecil’s mother had been poisoned by an assassin from Mocnejsi.”
“Oh,” Logan said, mind already racing.
“They figured out that one of the young women who had been hired on in the kitchen for the winter had done it, and had learned her origin when they questioned her,” Dad informed him. “Considering Cecil was immediately approached for an alliance with Mocnejsi, their aim was likely to manipulate her going forward because of how young she is. Luckily, Cecil is a smart girl and has the help of her mother’s advisor as well as her own. By the time I got there, my only real role was to extend my condolences and reaffirm out alliance. I would have stayed longer, but the possibility that Mocnejsi may think to attack us in a similar way hastened me home.”
 “That…” Logan said. “That is wise. I assume you are going to institute more security.”
“I am, yes,” Dad replied. “I would like your input on plans in the coming day.”
“Of course,” Logan agreed.
Dad smiled at him, “But for now,” he said, “I think it’s time you get back to your slumber party and I get to finally go to sleep.”
Logan nodded and got to his feet. He leaned over to hug his father perhaps a bit longer and harder than was strictly necessary, but Dad did not seem to mind at all. “Goodnight,” Logan said.
“Goodnight, son.”
  Chapter 21
Virgil woke with something soft but kind of stringy in his face. That was weird. He didn’t know what in the closet would feel like that. In fact, as he woke more he noticed more things that he couldn’t sus out the origin of, particularly the warmth curled up against his side. Curious, he blinked open his eyes. Oh, right. Patton.
The soft stuff in his face was Patton’s hair and the warmth next to Virgil was the rest of the boy’s body. Patton had all but refused to let Virgil go last night after Logan had taken off the restraints and Virgil hadn’t minded the attention. They must have fallen asleep together in the piles of pillows and blankets on the floor.
 Virgil brushed his hair gently away, internally (for fear of disturbing him) shaking his head at him. He’d fallen asleep hallway on top of an assassin. He had no self-preservation instincts. He looked at his wrists. It seemed no one had any self-preservation instincts. This of course, included himself as instead of running off when free in case they decided to turn him in after all, he had fallen asleep on the floor with Patton too.
He looked to the side and saw Logan was already awake, reading on one of his chairs. He seemed to sense Virgil’s eyes on him because he looked up after a moment.
 “You can get up if you like,” Logan said. “He is a heavy sleeper and won’t wake up if you squirm out of his grip.”
Virgil frowned, unsure if he wanted to risk it.
“I have breakfast ready for you.”
Okay, Virgil was going to risk it.
He carefully squirmed out of Patton’s grip, leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead in apology for leaving him before getting to his feet.
Logan handed him a plate of eggs and toast when he walked over and gestured to the chair next to him. Virgil sat there to eat while Logan continued to read.
 Virgil ate his food quickly, and then glanced over at Logan once he was done. Virgil was honestly at a bit of a loss. Usually, they came and got him out of the closet only once they were ready to do something, but Patton was still sound asleep on the floor and Logan looked engrossed in his book.
Virgil fidgeted slightly, unsure what he should be doing or even if he should be doing anything. Considering Logan hadn’t given him any instructions, he should probably not do anything. He didn’t want to screw up the first day of… whatever this was now.
 Logan glanced over at him after a few minutes. “Don’t forget about the potion,” he reminded.
Virgil nodded and stood, walking over to the closet since it would still be in there from the previous morning. It was about half gone now and it had gotten to the point where Virgil didn’t feel any immediate affects from it anymore other than some warmth. It basically just felt like drinking tea.
He said as much to Logan when he walked back over to him.
“That’s good,” Logan said, “it means it has been working. It has healed any damage it can from malnutrition. Any internal organs that were damaged should be mostly healed. You may even notice your eyesight getting slightly better. Your immune system should also be boosted. You will likely also find it is easier to gain muscle and while you likely will never be as tall as you could have been, you will likely still grow a few inches during your next growth spirt.”
 Virgil studied his hands where they were sitting on his thigh now as though he could see the changes that allegedly had already taken place in his body. “Thank you,” he said quietly.
“Of course,” Logan replied, eyes already back on his book like it was some normal thing and not a huge kindness he’d bestowed on Virgil before even really knowing him. As though Virgil didn’t just owe him more than just his life going forward.
They sat in silence then for a few more minutes, before the was a soft sigh from the floor and Patton started to wake. He sat up and looked around. His eyes landed on both Virgil and Logan sitting together and he seemed to light up.
 “Good morning!” he chirped.
“Good morning, Patton,” Logan said as Patton popped to his feet, “I have breakfast for you.”
“Thank you Lo,” Patton said, throwing his arms around Logan’s neck, and giving him a kiss on the cheek. Virgil presumed from the lack of surprise on Logan’s face that this was normal for morning Patton, not that the fact surprised him considering how night Patton acted.
He still managed to be somewhat surprised by the fact that Patton turned to hug Virgil a second later. Patton’s lips were pressed briefly to Virgil’s head and then he turned to grab the plate Logan had saved for him.
 “So, what are we doing today?” Patton asked.
“I was thinking Virgil and I could continue our reading lessons if he is not opposed,” Logan said. Virgil nodded, happy with that prospect. “Other than that, I have no plans. I have already spoken with my father before the two of you woke. He is going to spend most of his day catching up on things he missed and said I could take the rest of the day off royal duties.”
“A whole day to relax then!” Patton said, happily chewing on his toast. “Reading sounds fun, but we should do something more active too.”
 Logan hummed. “We can show Virgil the courtyard after the reading lessons,” he said.
It took a moment for it to register, but then Virgil froze. “Wait,” he said. “We’re going outside?”
Logan raised an eyebrow at him. “Yes.”
“So, we’re leaving your room?”
“Are you alright with that?” Logan asked cautiously.
Virgil nodded quickly.
“Oh,” Patton said at his enthusiasm. “I guess you have been cooped up a while, haven’t you?” He smiled sadly and turned to Logan. “Maybe we can do reading lessons in the garden.”
“That would be satisfactory.”
“Great!” Patton said. He looked over at Virgil. “If we’re going out, we should probably put your hair up and get you in some clean clothes.”
 Logan nodded. “You finish eating, and I will help Virgil find something to wear.”
Logan found him an outfit, though it was a bit baggy on Virgil and the hem of the shirt went halfway to his knees. When Patton finished breakfast, he sat Virgil down and carefully worked a brush through his hair.
“Can I braid it?” Patton asked.
Virgil hummed his consent. Having his hair brushed and done up by another person was a lot more enjoyable than he’d anticipated. He’d liked it when Logan did it the night before, though he had to very firmly push away thoughts of where that led.
 “Okay!” Patton said after a few moments. “You look good. Ready to go?”
Virgil nodded and they both led him out into the hall. He paused before they got to the door. “What about the guards?” he asked hesitantly.
“I’ve already given them the same story as I did Dad,” Logan replied. “They know you’re here.”
Virgil still hesitated.
“It’s okay,” Patton promised. “Here, hold my hand?”
Virgil took the offered hand immediately, and Logan stepped in front of them both. Virgil felt himself relax a bit knowing the prince was between him and the guards.
They led him to the door.
 Logan greeted both of the guards at the door, and they said good morning back. Both of them glanced at Virgil curiously for a moment making him shrink into himself, but they quickly averted their gazes.
Patton pulled him past them without incident and soon they were in the small dining hall Virgil had passed through his first night here. He remembered how he’d snuck around at the edges of the room in the shadows with the aim to kill the king, but now he was being pulled through the middle with the prince having just wandered past the royal guards in broad daylight like it was nothing.
 It was so strange, and Virgil still couldn’t totally believe this was happening. The retraced his exact steps back down the spiral stairs near the kitchen and out of the door he and the nice gardener had came through. He could even see the shed he’d been hiding in from here. With a blink, he remembered they were going to the garden, and he wondered if he’d see the man again.
For now, he just looked around them as Logan and Patton led him past the garden shed towards an area with many trees. Orange and yellow leaves were starting to fall from many of the trees.
 They made a satisfying crunching sound under his feet as he was led to a tree. He had seen the group of trees when he’d first arrived here and had even thought about hiding amongst them instead of in the shed, but they’d seemed scary in the dark. They were pretty in the daylight, however, and Virgil found himself tilting his head to watch the branches sway in the slight wind.
Logan sat down under it and pulled out a book and some writing materials from the bag he’d brought. Virgil settled down next to him so they could both look at the book at the same time and Patton flopped down on the other side, immediately setting to work tying fancy knots in the yarn he’d brought with him. Patton shuffled slightly to the side so they bumped shoulders as Logan opened the book and started Virgil’s reading lesson.
  Chapter 22
Patton bit his lip to keep from laughing or awing. “Do you like the flower, Virgil?” he asked.
Virgil glanced up at him briefly and then his eyes returned to the flower he’d found. “It’s nice,” he said.
They’d finished the reading lessons and let Virgil explore the garden a bit. He’d found a dark purple and yellow flower (a pansy, Patton thought) and seemed to be endlessly fascinated by it. He’d been staring at it for minutes now, almost as though he expected it to do something. Patton did not quite understand his interest, but he was still adorable.
 Logan sat next to him and the flower, smiling at him softly. “I imagine you’ll enjoy the garden in the spring,” Logan said. “There are many more flowers then. Of all types. We’ll have to show you all of the best spots. Mr. Deknis has a particularly good eye for colors, and it is always quite beautiful.”
“Who is Mr. Deknis?” Virgil asked.
“He’s the head gardener,” Logan said. “He’s a nice man, though a bit prickly when it comes to his garden. We may see him today if he’s in this part of the garden.”
“Would he have been the multrum I saw in the gardening shed when I hid there?”
 “Ah, yes, that would be him. I was unaware you interacted with anyone in the castle.”
“He caught me in his garden shed, but he wasn’t mean,” Virgil said, he tilted his head curiously at Logan. “Why…” he trailed off.
“Yes?” Logan asked.
“Why is he the gardener?”
Logan looked confused, “Well,” he said, “I guess because he wants to and is good at it.”
“No,” Virgil said with a frown. “I mean. Shouldn’t he… he’s…”
Logan seemed to think hard for a moment. “Right,” he said. “You’ve been under a blood compulsion. I’d guess you would have only worked with multrums in the military.”
 “I guess I didn’t realize that they could be other things…”
“Of course, they can,” Logan said. “Their abilities don’t make them any less of people. Mr. Deknis likes to garden so he gardens.”
Virgil blinked at him.
“…Of course, all things considered, that may not be a familiar concept to you.” Virgil turned back to look at the flower instead of answering. “Right,” said Logan.
There were a couple of awkward beats of silence. Patton bit his lip and happened to glance up. “Oh,” he said. “Speaking of Mr. Deknis.” He gestured to the gardener who was coming up the path between the trees.
 Logan sat up on his knees as Patton waved at him. He saw Patton and turned to walk towards them. “The two of you had better not be up to mischief in my garden,” Mr. Deknis called, his voice a bit gruff. He clearly did not see Virgil who had laid flat on his stomach to stare at the flower.
Logan rolled his eyes automatically. “We were just reading Mr. Deknis,” he said. “Your piles of dirt are safe.”
“No mud cakes?” Mr. Deknis asked skeptically still coming towards them.
“It has been a literal decade…”
Patton saw when Mr. Deknis was close enough to see Virgil.
 He stopped in his track and looked down at Virgil who was already watching him a bit warily. “Hello,” he said, his voice a lot softer than it’d been a few moments before. His expression completely flipped in a moment to something very gentle when he saw Virgil and the cautious look on his face. Virgil did seem to have that effect on people.
“Hi,” Virgil replied.
Mr. Deknis looked at Logan and then at Patton and then back at Virgil. “This is our new friend, Virgil,” Patton offered.
“Hello, Virgil,” Mr. Deknis said with a nod.
“Virgil, this is the gardener Mr. Deknis.”
 “He’s not nearly as grumpy as he sounds,” Patton assured.
“Well,” Logan said, “yes he is.”
Mr. Deknis shot him a look that only served to prove Logan’s point if Patton was being honest. Logan just smiled back. Mr. Deknis apparently decided to let it slide because he turned back to Virgil.
“It’s good to see you again,” Mr. Deknis said. “Are you feeling better?”
Virgil nodded. “I’m a lot better,” he said. Mr. Deknis considered him for a moment, clearly reading how true that statement was. Patton was glad he seemed satisfied with the answer.
“I see you’ve met these two.”
 “Yeah,” Virgil said.
Mr. Deknis smiled slightly. “Be careful with this one,” he said, pointing to Logan. “He’s a bad influence.”
Virgil frowned in confusion. “He’s the prince,” he pointed out.
“And a bad influence,” Mr. Deknis repeated. “He’s a beacon of irresponsibility and mischief and he corrupts that one,” he nodded to Patton.
“I am completely responsible,” Logan replied.
“Need I remind you of the cucumber incident.”
“I was 8,” Logan said.
“I know how old you were,” Mr. Deknis replied, “and you are hardly any older.”
“I resent that.”
Mr. Deknis just smiled and turned back to Virgil who was watching the interaction with pure curiosity.
 “I just picked a few more of those apples for Patton’s mom to make into apple sauce. Would you kids like some?”
Virgil glanced over at Logan and Patton.
“That would be nice, thank you,” Patton replied for them all, standing up. Seeing that, Virgil also climbed to his feet.
“It’s back this way,” Mr. Deknis said, inclining hid head back the way he’d came and then turning to lead them that way. Patton followed him. He glanced back to see Logan put his hand on Virgil’s shoulder and give him a gentle push to get him going. “So, what are you kids up to today?”
 “We wanted to show Virgil the garden and courtyard,” Patton said. “He’s been cooped up inside for a bit.”
“I see,” Mr. Deknis said. He glanced back at Virgil. “Feel free to come out in the garden anytime you like. As long as you don’t go about purposefully destroying stuff, I don’t mind you being out here.”
“I won’t destroy anything,” Virgil promised instantly.
“Well I hope you manage to keep that attitude even while befriending the large upright groundhog behind you.”
Virgil looked a little bit nervous. “He’s just teasing Virgil,” Patton assured. “He loves Logan.”
Mr. Deknis glanced back again and seemed to read the same thing Patton had read on Virgil’s face.
 “Yes, of course,” Mr. Deknis said. “I have simply known the prince for a long time and joke with him in that way often. Logan is aware of that.”
“Indeed,” Logan agreed, his hand squeezing a bit on Virgil’s shoulder. Virgil relaxed a touch.
Mr. Deknis stopped and reached down into a bucket next to a tree. “I wouldn’t offer my apples to people I don’t like,” he said, tossing an apple underhand to Logan. Instead of trying to catch it, his eyes widened and he dodged out of the way.
“You would however throw apples at them despite knowing they have never been able to catch things.”
 Mr. Deknis just rolled his eyes fondly, but Virgil frowned and turned to Logan. “You don’t know how to catch things?” he asked scandalized. “You should know how to catch things. What if someone throws a knife at you?”
Mr. Deknis looked… probably the right amount of concerned about that statement coming from a 14-year-old’s lips.
“Haha, yeah,” Patton said awkwardly. “Maybe you can teach Logan how to catch things Virgil, but later. Right now, why don’t we just get the apples and then show you the courtyard.”
Virgil was still frowning, but he did not argue with Patton’s suggestion.
 Thankfully, Mr. Deknis did not push, though Patton did have to dodge many a meaningful side eye. He might… need to make sure he did not get cornered by the gardener in the coming days… or brush up on his lying without lying skills.
For now, though, he just handed out the apples, not tossing them this time. Virgil thanked him softly and Patton could see the way the usually fairly gruff man went all melty at that. He even slipped an extra apple to Virgil for later which Virgil perked up at.
Patton and Logan pulled him away gently after that so Mr. Deknis could go back to work, but Virgil seemed happy with the apples and copied Patton at waving goodbye to him cheerfully.
Despite the fact that he liked Mr. Deknis and he’d been nice, Patton still took a calming breath when they were no longer at risk of lying about something and getting caught by the man’s powers. They went back into the castle towards the courtyard.
  Chapter 23
Logan was unsurprised that after showing Virgil the large courtyard, Patton almost immediately decided to instigate a game of tag. They were, after all, here with the goal of getting Virgil a bit active after having had him only in Logan’s room for weeks.
He was also unsurprised that Virgil seemed confused about the concept of tag, and Patton had to explain the game in detail to him.
It made him wince, but he still was unsurprised when Virgil went about inquiring after the consequences of losing the game.
He was, however, very surprised when, after getting all of the facts about tag settle, Patton was chasing after Virgil trying to tag him and suddenly the boy disappeared.
 Patton almost ran into a wall in his confusion. He stared at his hands stretched out and just a couple of inches from touching the wall for a moment, before slowly looking up.
“Virgil!” Patton exclaimed. “What?”
“What?” he asked.
“…What are you even hanging onto?”
“The wall,” Virgil replied.
Logan walked closer to the two of them and tilted his head up to look at him. Virgil had jumped up and somehow managed to find hand and foot holes on the seemingly smooth wall. He climbed about 5 meters above their heads and was peering down at them curiously.
 “Okay,” Logan said. “New rule. Virgil is not allowed to scale walls during tag.”
Virgil frowned down at him. “Why only me?”
“Because Patton and I cannot do that anyway,” Logan said. “We would not be able to actually play if you remain up there.”
Patton glanced over at him and reached over to touch Logan’s shoulder. “No tag backs,” he said. Logan glared at him. “Why don’t you come down sweetie?”
“But Logan will tag me,” he said.
“Well, honey, that’s part of the fun,” Patton reasoned. “Don’t you want to try being it?”
Virgil seemed to consider this for a long moment. “Okay,” he agreed.
 To Logan’s terror, he simply let go of the wall, falling straight down and landing crouched. He blinked at Logan. Right. With a start, Patton took off, so he’d have a head start. “No tag backs means a 10 second head start for me,” Logan reminded. Virgil nodded, and Logan reached out to poke him in the arm before immediately running off in the opposite direction as Patton.
Logan’s strategy worked out since, knowing he couldn’t go after Logan for a few seconds more, he chose to turn and go after Patton. After finding one of the statues to hide behind on the edge of the courtyard, Logan risked glancing back.
 Virgil was faster than Logan (and likely Patton) had accounted for. Patton had gotten a good head start on him, but Virgil closed it quickly. Patton shrieked as Virgil barreled into him, bringing them both to the ground.
“Virgil!” Logan heard Patton giggle. Logan figured he was more than okay despite the tackle. “This isn’t how you play tag!”
“I combined tag and tackle hugs,” Virgil declared, making Patton giggle more.
“That’s very innovative, honey,” Patton said. “Now are you going to let me up?...Virgil… I’m counting down your 10 second head start in my head, and if you don’t let me up I’m going to tag you again.”
 This did not seem to have the intended effect as Virgil did not remove himself from Patton’s person. Patton laugh when it became clear he was not going to move and began counting down “7, 6, 5, 4, you’d better let me go sweetie, or you’re going to get tagged again.” Virgil did not seem to care. “3, 2, 1.” Patton reached up and bopped him on the nose. “Tag!” he declared.
Logan was surprised when Virgil instantly jumped off Patton at that. He whipped around.
‘Oh,’ Logan thought as the boy’s eyes narrowed in on Logan immediately, ‘I see.’
 “Virgil was already halfway across the courtyard towards him before Logan could even think about running away. There was no way that he was fast enough to outrun him. Perhaps he could outthink him, he thought. His eyes scanned his environment in the seconds he had left and landed on a large square piece of stone that held flowers in the spring. It was just full of dirt now, but it was still about waist high. Perhaps if he kept that between them, he could outmaneuver him. He sprinted towards it and scrambled to the opposite side from where Virgil was heading.
 He really should not have been as surprised as he was that Virgil did not even slightly slow as he approached the planter box, instead grabbing ahold of the side of it and vaulting over it. Logan stumbled back, bracing for impact, but instead he just got a quick tap on the shoulder.
Logan blinked at him.
“I don’t know if you would be okay with tackle hugs,” he explained.
Logan considered him. “I would be okay with a nontackle hug.”
Virgil happily jumped forward to hug Logan, pressing his nose into Logan’s shoulder. Logan chuckled and patted the top of his head. “Six,” he said, “5, 4, 3…”
 Virgil bolted away suddenly, actually making Logan stumble a bit. He paused just out of reach of Logan, looking at him with anticipation. “2,1,” Logan finished with a raised eyebrow. He already knew he was being played with, but he indulged him by starting towards him. Virgil danced out of the way, eyes alight. Logan sighed. “Is this truly how it’s going to be?” he asked.
Virgil didn’t answer, but to watch him with wide, excited eyes.
“Fine,” Logan said. He dashed towards him again, only to have him continue to maneuver just out of Logan’s reach each time Logan went forward. He’d call it taunting if there was any sign of malice in it.
 They ran around the courtyard in spirts of Logan charging at him and Virgil expertly dodging. Eventually Patton came closer to them. Logan could tell that Virgil was aware of his presence, by how he glanced back at him briefly, but considering he was not ‘it,’ it seemed he chose to disregard him. However, he was not aware of the way Patton winked at Logan as he walked up behind Virgil.
Logan, on the other hand, knew exactly what was happening. He went to spring for Virgil again, and Virgil again moved to dodge, but this time Patton grabbed him around the waist, allowing Logan to actually tag him.
 He turned slowly to face Patton who started to giggle immediately at the perplexed look on his face. It cleared into something else as soon as he heard Patton laugh. “Traitor!” he claimed. “We were on the same team and you betrayed me.”
“I just thought we should probably have mercy on poor Logan,” Patton replied.
“Hmm,” Virgil said, eyes again full of that playful mischief Logan had not seen until today. “Plea for mercy not accepted.”
Patton once again half-shrieked half-laughed as he was pounced on. The two of them went rolling across the grass, Virgil clearly keeping the rolling going longer than it should have as they made it a good few meters.
 Virgil sprung off of him a few moments later.
“Oh, is it my turn?” Patton inquired with a huge smile. He slowly got to his feet. “Hmm, I’m probably at about 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!” He took off after Virgil, but Patton had a bit more endurance than Logan, so instead of doing quickly calculated lunges at Virgil as Logan had done, he just ran at him full tilt without stopping.
Virgil ran from him, though Logan was pretty sure he was intentionally slowing himself down a bit so Patton had some amount of a chance. He kept turning to check behind him and make sure Patton was still somewhat close as he ran.
Which is why he didn’t see the imminent disaster in time.
  Chapter 24
Thomas should have been paying more attention, but his mind had been on the meeting he’d just had with the castle guards about increased security in the wake of the possible threat from Mocnejsi. He’d decided to take a brief walk around the courtyard to clear his head but was still distracted with mulling over the options that had just been presented to him. He stepped into the castle courtyard and did not have time to step out of the way of the much smaller body rocketing towards him. Virgil slammed into his front, but not before Thomas got a good look at his face.
 Virgil’s expression changed dramatically in the few seconds between him registering Thomas was there and running into him. For the briefest moment, Thomas could see that he must have been having a lot of fun. He’d caught the wide smile and sparkling eyes as Virgil turned his head back from looking at Patton who was chasing him across the greenery. He’d looked very happy which made it all the more painful to see that happiness die in and a few instants. When his head had turned back towards Thomas, there was a flicker of confusion at something being in his path.
 Then, clearly everything about the situation registered, because his eyes blew wide in horror as he tried to stop himself, but there was no way he’d be able to in time. Thomas saw that fact register on his face the moment before he hit. Gone was any trace of happiness or joy in that split second. All that was left was dread that had no place anywhere near a children’s game of tag. It was the expression Thomas would expect from someone who felt ice give way under their feet in the middle of a lake they had thought was frozen solid.
 He hit hard, but he wasn’t nearly big enough to actually harm Thomas. Thomas was thrown slightly off balance but managed to stay on his feet. He reached out a hand to his shoulder automatically to steady the child. There was a moment of pseudo calm where they both absorbed the impact and stilled.
Then, the boy’s shoulder slipped out of Thomas’s grip as he went crashing to the ground in a move that made Thomas wince for the state of his knees. Thomas couldn’t quite grasp what was happening for a moment as Virgil face planted onto the ground in front of him, but when he did, Thomas couldn’t help but flinch and take a step back from him.
 Thomas had been bowed to before, of course, seeing as he was a king, but this was not out of respect or courtesy or even just tradition. This was out of terror. He was begging for mercy and it made Thomas feel sick.
“I’m sorry,” he said, meek and shaky into the ground, and there was almost something worse about the fact that he did not beg for forgiveness with his words, but only his posture. The way his breathes came far too quick and shallow said he was likely on the verge of a panic attack, but he was not blubbering through apologies or even not speaking at all. He gave a clear, if shaky, apology, and waited for whatever he thought Thomas planned to do to him. There was no way that was not learned.
 “You don’t…” Thomas stuttered. “You don’t have to do that. It’s okay.”
“I’m sorry,” he said again, but he reacted in no other way. He did not even react when Patton made it to his side and knelt down next to him. Patton’s hand hovered over his back, clearly wanting to touch down, but he pulled back on that instinct.
“Virgil, honey,” he said softly. “It’s okay. No one is mad. It was an accident.”
Virgil did not react to this at all.
Thomas caught Logan’s eye as he hurried over to them himself. “Sorry,” Thomas mouthed. Logan just nodded and turned his attention to his friend.
 “There is no reason for any of that,” Logan said, his voice firm, almost clipped. “You are not in trouble. Now sit up.”
Virgil did respond to that, slowly shifting back on his knees. He kept his head down looking at the ground. “Sorry,” he said again.
“I…” Thomas said, surveying the three kids on the ground in front of him. Thomas slowly sunk to the ground to be at their level. Virgil was tracking his movements out of the corner of his eyes, his head still bowed and his shoulders tensed. “Hey,” Thomas said softly. “Were you three playing tag?”
 Virgil hesitated, eyes flickering as he debated whether he should respond or not.
“Yeah, we were,” Patton answered for him after a moment of stressful silence.
“Well that’s fun,” Thomas said. “I’m sorry for interrupting the three of you. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”
Virgil glanced up at him for just a moment before looking away again. Patton apparently felt it was safe enough to touch Virgil, because he settled a hand on the boys shoulder.
“Yeah, we’ve just been having a fun day,” Patton said, carefully matching Thomas’s light tone. “We went to the garden and did some reading. Then, Mr. Deknis gave us some apples.”
 “That’s nice,” Thomas replied. “He’s been talking about the new apples he’s been growing. He’s been working on them for years and they’re just beginning to bare fruit this year. I haven’t gotten a chance to try any yet. Are they any good?”
“They’re very good,” Patton told him. His hand rubbed slowly on Virgil’s back. “Isn’t that right, Virge?”
Virgil nodded a bit, a little less tense now, but still nowhere near calm.
“Well, I’ll have to try them soon,” Thomas said with a smile. “Thank you for the information. Now, I’ve got to get back to what I’m doing, but I hope you three have a good day.”
 “I’ll see you later, Dad,” Logan said.
Thomas nodded and pushed himself to his feet. “Goodbye you three,” he said before turning away towards the door back into the castle. He paused to take a breath when the door closed behind him, cutting off the courtyard. There were a lot of thoughts to shirt through in regards to that conversation. He hated that Virgil was so obviously terrified of him. Both of their two interactions had ended with the poor thing panicking on the ground. He wished he had some idea of how to help him or at least someone to talk to about it.
Maybe he’d go visit Mr. Deknis himself and not just for the apples.
  Chapter 25
“Alright,” Patton said, pressing a kiss to Virgil’s forehead. “I’ve got to go back to my room for the night. Will you two be okay?”
“We’ll be fine,” Logan said. “It won’t be particularly different than the last two weeks.”
Patton nodded and leaned to the side to squeeze Virgil in another hug. He’d been clingy since the incident in the courtyard, and Virgil had been appreciative considering he was still pretty shaky from it. He was still surprised he’d touched the king of Prijaznia (let alone ran into him) and lived to tell the tale.
“Goodnight, Pat,” Virgil said because he was pretty sure he wouldn’t leave if Virgil didn’t.
 “Night Virge,” Patton said with a smile before standing up from where they’d been sitting on the ground. He reached over to hug Logan who was sitting on a chair. “Night Lo! Put the book down and go to bed.”
Logan looked up from his book with a frown.
“It’s almost midnight,” Patton scolded.
Logan sighed and set his book down. “Very well,” he agreed. “We will get ready for bed.”
“You better! I’m going to come and wake you up early in the morning.”
“Early in the morning for you is 9am,” Logan scoffed.
Patton stuck his tongue out at him as he walked backwards out of the door.
 Logan gave his book a mournful look once the door closed and Virgil almost giggled. “I won’t tell on you,” he said.
Logan thought about it for a few moments. “No,” he finally said. “We should probably get some sleep.”
Virgil nodded and pushed himself to his feet.
“We should probably both take a bath after sitting in the dirt today,” Logan said. “Do you want to go first or should I?”
“Don’t care,” Virgil answered.
“You can go first,” Logan offered.
Virgil felt himself smile. “You just want to finish the chapter in that book,” he accused.
“Perhaps,” Logan conceded.
 Virgil just grinned and walked over to his closet to grab one of the outfits he’d been given for pajamas. He chose a pair of baggy shorts that went past his knees and the huge soft black sweater Logan had found in the back of his closet. He headed into the bathroom, noting Logan had already picked up his book again.
Logan may have declared the both of them dirty enough for bathing a few minutes before, but Virgil was cleaner than he thought he’d ever been before coming to the castle. Logan had taught him how to use the tub and what soaps to use for what a couple of days after he’d arrived and had suggested he clean himself regularly.
 Virgil didn’t mind. The tub was enchanted to warm the water inside of it and Virgil loved it. Though, that had the negative affect of making it very difficult to leave.
He cleaned himself up quickly, so he’d have a few minutes to just sit in the water before he felt like he needed to get out and let Logan have a turn. He changed into his pajamas, pulling the crescent shaped protection charm out of his day clothes pocket and storing the warm to the touch stone in the short pocket. He used the clip Patton had made it to pin it to the cloth to make sure he wouldn’t lose it.
 Logan was engrossed in his reading by the time that Virgil exited the bathroom. He did not look up as Virgil approached.
“Your turn,” Virgil said to him.
Logan clearly just barely managed to tear his eyes away from the book. “Right,” he said. “Yes.”
“The book will be there in the morning,” Virgil reminded.
“I know,” said Logan sadly as he set the book aside.
Logan never took much time in the bath, so Virgil quickly went about getting ready for bed the rest of the way. He put his day clothes in the basket Logan had for that purpose and started to straighten out the blankets and pillows in the closet.
 He heard Logan come back into the room a few minutes later.
“Virgil,” Logan said. “What are you doing?”
Virgil looked over at him. “Getting ready for bed,” he answered, confused.
Logan frowned at him. “You don’t sleep in the closet anymore,” Logan said. “That’s only for when we were worried you might escape.”
“Oh,” Virgil said blinking over at him. “Right.” He felt a slight pulling at his chest. He liked the closet. It was warm and soft. Patton had taken a lot of care with how he’d arranged all of the pillows and blankets. It was the best place he could ever remember having to sleep in his life. Yet, he did not argue. He knew getting to sleep out in the open was supposed to be a reward and he wasn’t about to reject it.
 Virgil stood and closed the closet. He tugged on the bottom of his sweater, stretching the fabric between his hands as he watched Logan pull down the covers of his bed and settle down onto it. Cautiously he walked over towards the bed. He wasn’t sure where he should lay down exactly. He dithered for a moment before bending down to sit on the floor near the right side of Logan’s bed and then laying down.
There was shuffling on the bed above him and then Logan’s head popped over the side to squint down at him. “On the bed Virgil,” he said.
 Virgil looked up at him in shock. “But it… I’m…” He trailed off and there were a few seconds of silence.
“It is just a bed Virgil,” Logan said.
But it wasn’t ‘just’ anything. Virgil was pretty sure touching the bed of a royal family member without permission would be considered a capital offence. At least, it would in Mocnejsi. Yet, Logan was expecting him to just… crawl into it?
“Please just get up here,” Logan said. Virgil’s caution at touching something he was definitely sure he should not be allowed to be touching wared with his resolve to repay his literal life debt to Logan by doing whatever he wanted.
 Feeling honestly a bit sick to his stomach, Virgil slowly pushed himself back to his feet. Logan scooted back over to the left side of the bed, and Virgil cautiously sat down on the empty side of the bed. After a second of hesitation he slowly laid down, his head hitting a soft fluffy pillow. He jumped when Logan flopped the covers on top of both of them.
Virgil took a long moment to absorb the situation while Logan took off his glasses and reached over to turn off the light next to him. He’d never slept in a bed before, or if he had he’d been too young to remember. In the orphanage there was a lack of actual beds due to overcrowding and there had always been someone bigger and stronger that Virgil didn’t dare fight for the use of them. During training, none of the kids had a bed. Only a few of the higher ups had ones at the more permanent training sites. There were very few situations where any of the assassins, at least a Virgil’s level, would be allowed to touch a real bed.
 The light switched off, plunging them into darkness.
“Is this…?” Virgil said, eyes still pointed towards the ceiling even though his eyes had not adjusted to the darkness enough to be able to see it. “Do you want… things?”
“Things?” Logan asked.
Virgil did not move his head, but he did reach over and put his hand slightly above Logan’s knee. Logan didn’t move, so Virgil slid his hand up.
Virgil’s wrist was grabbed immediately and pulled firmly away from Logan’s inner thigh. He did not let go afterwards, his fingers squeezing hard, but not quite painfully. “Never,” Logan said, his voice harsher than it had ever been even on the day when Virgil was nothing more than an intruder with deadly intent. “Never offer anything like that to anyone ever again.”
 “I was just…”
“I know what you were doing,” Logan said, voice icy, “and it inadmissible. Never offer that again for anything. Do you understand me?”
“I... yes.”
“Promise me.”
Virgil took a short moment to think. “I promise,” he agreed.
“Good,” Logan said, releasing his hand. His voice got softer too. “Good.”
They were silent for a long time after that, though Virgil had no delusions that Logan had fallen asleep. He could almost feel the tension.
“Sorry,” Virgil finally said softly.
“It’s not something you should be apologizing for,” Logan replied. The bed moved as Logan shifted and a hand lightly touched the top of his head. “Just… never.”
 “Okay,” Virgil said. He shifted slightly after a moment until his head was in the crook of Logan’s arm. Logan brushed the hair out of his face with the hand that had been on his head.
“Goodnight Virgil,” Logan said.
“Goodnight,” Virgil responded. They were quiet after that, though Virgil was still awake for a while yet and Logan’s hand slowly stroked through his hair for a while. Eventually though, Virgil relaxed into mattress. He stuck his hand into his pocket and curled it around the charm in his pocket. The bed was nice, he thought. It was soft and warm… and safe. He finally fell asleep.
  Chapter 26
Patton did their new special knock on the door so Logan and Virgil would know it was just him and they didn’t need to hide the fact that Virgil was sleeping in the prince’s room. He didn’t wait for a response, however, and just shoved open the door. He was surprised to see that Logan was not already out of bed and wondered for a moment if he had broken his promise stayed up way too late reading like he was sometimes known to do. Yet, then, Logan spoke from the bed. “I’m awake,” he called.
Confused, Patton stepped into the room. Logan wasn’t one for lazing around in bed; usually he was out of bed the moment he woke.
 He stepped over to the bed and had to stifle a smile when he recognized the problem. Logan was awake, but Virgil was still sleeping, and he was half on top of Logan, his arms wrapped around him.
“Why don’t you just squirm out of his arms like you do me?” Patton asked, keeping his voice low.
“He isn’t like you,” Logan said. He did not bother to quiet himself at all.
“What do you mean?” Patton asked amused.
In answer, Logan started to move as though to squirm out of Virgil’s death grip on him. In response, Virgil made a pitiful mewling sound in his sleep that landed like a piercing blow straight to the heart. Logan stopped moving immediately and Virgil shifted to grip Logan tighter.
 “Aw!” Patton said.
“It’s not cute,” Logan insisted. “I’ve been stuck for hours and I have to pee.”
Patton chuckled. “Alright, alright, I’ll save you.” He rounded the bed to Virgil’s side and crawled up on it. “Virgil, honey,” he entreated softly. “I think it’s time for me to get cuddles so Lo can get up.” Patton softly touched Virgil’s shoulder and pulled at him gently. He reached forward to carefully pry Virgil’s arms off of Logan.
Virgil made a more confused than heartbreaking sound this time, turning towards Patton so Patton could wrap his arms around him. Logan managed to scoot towards the edge of the bed.
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Logan made it off the bed and dashed towards the bathroom as Virgil’s arms came around Patton and squeezed. Patton laughed and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. After a few moments, Virgil’s eyes started to flicker a bit.
“Good morning, honey,” Patton said softly. “Did you sleep good?”
He hummed sleepily. “Beds are nice,” he said. Patton felt a slight pang at that because it implied he didn’t get to sleep in beds very much, but he chose to shove that aside.
“They are,” Patton agreed. Virgil’s eyes started to close again. “Honey,” Patton laughed. “I think it’s time to wake up now.”
 Virgil made a sleepy whining sound, squeezing Patton tighter. “Don’t you want breakfast?” Patton asked. That question managed to make Virgil open his eyes again. “I was thinking we could go down to the kitchen to eat that way it’s nice and fresh and I can introduce you to Mama real quick.” He neglected to mention the fact that they really did not have a choice. Mr. Deknis had blabbed to Mama about Virgil, and worse, had apparently mentioned that Virgil was skinny. As soon as he’d gotten home yesterday, he’d been met with an already worked up Mama firmly insisting that she meet Virgil sometime today.
 He wasn’t going to tell Virgil that though, because he thought it might scare him away from both Mama and Mr. Deknis.
Virgil thought about the prospect of breakfast for a long moment. “Fine,” he agreed. “I’ll be awake.”
“Good,” Patton said. He reached up to bop him on the nose. Virgil narrowed his eyes and then bopped him back making Patton giggle. He sat up then, and Virgil let him. “Let’s get you something to wear and do your hair,” Patton suggested. Virgil nodded and reluctantly got out of bed, just as Logan returned to the room. “We’re going to go downstairs for breakfast,” Patton told Logan. “That way Virgil can meet my mom.” He gave Logan a significant look and Logan nodded once in understanding that this was not a choice.
 Logan and Virgil got dressed, and Patton did Virgil’s hair up nice, before Patton led them out of the royal wing. They went down the main staircase instead of the spiral staircase that went right to the kitchen, mostly because it would be very busy, and Patton thought they should probably eat in the main dining room anyway. He could feel Virgil getting more anxious as they entered the busier part of the castle, and he stuck close to either Patton or Logan from the time they hit the top of the steps all the way to the main dining room.
 There were a few people in the dining room already eating breakfast when they arrived. Virgil’s curiosity seemed to temporarily overwhelm his anxiety as he looked around the large hall and at all of the people there. Patton looked around trying to see it through his eyes. He’d been running around this place since he was little, so he never really thought about how big the room was or how grandly it was decorated, but Virgil was just seeing it for the first time. Patton smiled at him as he guided him to one of the seats. There was already muffins on the table so Patton grabbed one and plopped it in front of Virgil.
 Virgil frowned down at the muffin dubiously. “You just… keep food out in the open?” he asked.
Right.
“It’s fine, Virgil,” Patton promised. “No one here would have put anything in it.”
Virgil narrowed his eyes and looked around at the other occupants of the room suspiciously.
“Honestly,” Logan said. “No one even knew we would be down here for breakfast. Nobody would just put something in random people’s food for no reason.”
Virgil gave him a look like he’d just told him people could in fact breathe under water. Virgil was really from a… whole different world, wasn’t he?
 “It’s really fine,” Patton said. “Logan and I have eaten things on the table like this a lot.”
“I’m surprised your not dead yet,” Virgil said.
Logan rolled his eyes and reached for a muffin. Virgil slapped it out of his hand and onto the floor. “Really?” Logan asked.
Virgil narrowed his eyes at him. “No eating unsecured food!”
“Virgil,” Logan groaned.
“I bet you don’t even know what common poisons taste like.”
“No,” Logan said. “I don’t because I don’t worry about being poisoned on a daily basis!”
“You should!”
People were starting to look over at them. Patton shot an awkward smile at the woman a few chairs down.
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“Just don’t eat the muffins Logan,” Patton said under his breath.
“I do not understand why-”
“Because it’s stupid as he-”
“Shush,” Patton commanded out of the corner of his mouth, “people are watching, and Virgil is just a normal castle resident.”
That shut the both of them up at least.
“No muffins for now,” Patton said. “I assume it’s okay to eat the things they bring straight from the kitchen.”
Virgil looked a bit leery of this still, but he nodded.
“Good,” Patton said, “then we’ll just wait for that to get here and then everyone will be happy, right?”
Logan opened his mouth and Patton turned to glare at him.
“Right?”
 Logan closed his mouth, though clearly, he did not want to give in so easily. They’d be doubtlessly rehashing this conversation once they were alone again.
Patton caught sight of one of the kitchen workers he knew fairly well come out of the kitchen and deliver food to a group of people who were there before them. She caught sight of them and walked over likely to ask them what they wanted for breakfast. Patton watched out of the corner of his eye as Virgil tensed, eyeing her approach suspiciously and she slowed under his glare.
This was going to be a long breakfast.
  Chapter 27
After an, honestly quite aggravating, breakfast full of Virgil’s cognitive distortions about the likelihood of being poisoned, Logan was relieved to finally be able to leave the dining area. In consideration to those serving breakfast, Patton did not lead them through the door in the back of the dining room that went directly to the kitchen, and instead took them out of the room and down the hall to a different entrance. This one had a guard stationed across from it as, despite what Virgil may believe, the castle workers did consider the possibility that someone would want to sneak into the kitchen for nefarious purposes.
 Said guard, of course, saw nothing wrong with the prince and the head chef’s son entering the side door even with the bonus stranger. In fact, he may even have known Virgil could be coming through this door if Ms. Heart had mentioned him.
Though Virgil hadn’t managed to catch it, Logan knew enough about Patton’s mother that he’d surmised that she had insisted Patton bring the boy to meet her. It was bound to happen at some point anyway, Logan knew, and he wasn’t particularly worried. After all, this was Patton’s mother. Virgil himself didn’t even seem particularly concerned.
 Logan had seen him panic and, while he tugged a bit at the sweater he was wearing, the motion was not particularly fervent, so he was likely just slightly nervous.
Of course, that may be because he did not know Patton’s mother specifically wanted to meet him and just assumed that they were starting the necessary process of introducing him to castle residents with a low risk person.
When they entered the hallway, Logan could already hear the usual noises of the kitchen: the clattering of plates, the bubble of conversation, and the sound of Ms. Heart’s voice calling out instructions.
 He did see Virgil hesitate, but Logan couldn’t sus out why and Patton was already ahead of them and opening the door into the kitchen. It was fairly calm for the kitchen considering it was meal hours. Logan imagined that Patton had chosen the time between when the day guards ate breakfast before their shifts and the night guards after their shifts on purpose. There was still a bit of chaos as dishwashers attempted to catch up during the lull and a few orders were still being made, but overall the mood seemed, to Logan at least, to be light as Ms. Heart ordered her kitchen around.
 Yet, Virgil clearly did not see the situation the same way that Logan did. He froze when the kitchen door swung open and some of the workers turned to look at them. He took a step back, bumped into Logan, startled violently, realized it was Logan, and then side stepped to hide behind him. Logan looked back at him in confusion, but Virgil said nothing, proceeding to mutely peer over Logan’s shoulder.
Patton had moved over to greet his mother as she wiped her hands off on a rag. She glanced over at Virgil and Logan and Logan saw Virgil shrink back a bit.
 Logan could see Ms. Heart’s eyes soften as she tracked his movement. She turned to the woman next to her and said something before moving to remove her apron and hang it up in its designated area. Virgil’s hands clenched in the fabric of Logan’s shirt when she turned back to him.
“It’s fine, Virgil,” Logan told him, but Virgil didn’t seem to believe him. Luckily, Patton had turned back and seemed to realize something was amiss.
He stepped back over to them. “Hey, honey,” he said. A plate clattered in the kitchen and Virgil just about ripped Logan’s shirt.
 Patton frowned sympathetically. “Too loud?”
“Virgil,” Logan said. “You are digging your fingernails into my skin.” Patton shot Logan a glare. “What?”
“How about,” Patton’s mom suggested. Virgil’s fingernails dug more into Logan’s skin. “We go to my office.”
“I think that’s a good idea, Mama,” Patton said. “Come here, Virgil.” He reached over to touch one of Virgil’s hands and had to pull a bit to get him to release Logan. “It’s back that way, away from the kitchen,” he said when he managed to twine their fingers. He stepped around Logan, probably so there was still a buffer between Virgil and the kitchen and tugged him in the correct direction.
 Ms. Heart shot a glance at Logan and Logan felt irrationally like she was trying to read his thoughts. Logan smoothed his features out and turned to follow Patton and Virgil towards her office.
As head chef, Ms. Heart had a small office where she could plan menus without the hustle and bustle of the kitchen and have meeting with people who needed to discuss dietary needs and restrictions. It was very well organized, but still looked fairly messy because of the numbers of decorations she had in it. She had a tendency to keep everything that Patton made her, thus she had his childhood drawings on the wall and little projects stacked on her desk and on the shelves. A lumpy cat statue acted as a paperweight on a stack of papers on her desk and there was a vase of fake flowers (as it could not actually hold water) sat near the window.
 By the time Logan entered the room, Patton was trying to coax Virgil into sitting down on one of the two mismatched chairs, but Virgil was having none of it. He had turned to face the door and was yanking at his sweater in nervousness.
Logan noticed that Ms. Heart did not come far into the room, instead pausing near the door. She did, however close the door to give them privacy, and that seemed to distress Virgil more.
She seemed to contemplate him for a moment. “Hello,” she said, her voice softer than Logan was used to hearing. “You must be Virgil.”
 It seemed as though he were willing himself to magically shrink, but he still replied. “Yes, ma’am,” he said quietly.
“It’s nice to meet you,” she said. “I’m Patton’s mom.”
“I know, ma’am.”
“There’s no need to be formal, Virgil.”
He hesitated. “Okay,” he said somehow quieter.
Her eyebrows drew together in concern, and it seemed that she decided to result to her default way of making people more comfortable. “Would you kids like some candy?”
Logan saw Patton’s hand squeeze Virgil’s lightly. “That would be great, Mama.”
She nodded and walked forward towards her desk. Virgil turned so his back was never to her. If she noticed, she didn’t react. She just grabbed a small tin off one of her shelves and took the top off. “How about a peppermint candy?” she asked.
 She offered the tin out to them. Virgil stared at it like it was a venomous snake. Logan decided to act, stepping forward and taking three of the pieces of peppermint candy from the dish. He stepped over to Virgil and Patton and held out his hand, offering Virgil first choice out of all three.
He hesitated before glancing between Patton and his mother. He must have decided that Patton’s mom wouldn’t risk poisoning Patton and took one of the pieces. Patton took another one of them and popped it into his mouth. Logan ate the last piece.
“Thanks,” Virgil said to Ms. Heart before placing his piece in his mouth.
 Logan watched Virgil’s eyes light up a bit when the flavor registered. His posture didn’t completely relax, but he seemed at least a bit less like he was contemplating jumping through the window. His trust was almost worryingly easy to buy sometimes. All it took was a not poisoned peppermint.
Ms. Heart seemed pleased by his reaction. “I’m actually going to be making some new ones soon and I’m trying to get rid of these. Would you like to take another one for later?” she asked, holding out the tin.
He looked at it warily again, but he still stepped closer slowly and took another piece. “Thank you.”
 “Anytime,” Ms. Heart said, eyes looking over him intensely. “You look like you could do to with a few more sweets every so often.”
Virgil tilted his head in that way he did when he was particularly perplexed.
Patton giggled a bit. “She means your skinny.”
“Oh,” Virgil said. “Logan already gave me a malnutrition potion for that.”
“Did he now?” she asked, her eyes flickering to Logan. Logan winced. He was definitely in trouble for not bringing him directly to her. He was sure he’d hear all about it as soon as she caught him without Virgil in the room.
 She turned back to Virgil with a smile, and Logan imagined Virgil had no idea how dead Logan was. “Well, that’s a very good start, but if there was need for a nutrition potion, we should be careful to make sure you get enough calories and nutrients every day going forward.” She sat down at her desk. “Why don’t you and I talk for a bit about making sure you get some good food.”
He still looked cautious but was predictably enticed by the promise of food. He did not sit still, but he did put his hands on the back of one of the chairs and slightly lean on it. “Yes, ma’am,” he agreed.
“Okay,” she said. “Well, I’m going to have a few more specific questions, but let’s just start with what are your favorite foods?”
“I’ll eat anything,” Virgil replied immediately.
“He really likes chicken alfredo,” Patton contributed.
Virgil perked up at the name of the food. “I did like that,” he agreed.
“Alright,” Ms. Heart replied. That’s a start.
  Chapter 28
Thomas did not have to be told that something had gotten Helen Heart in a tizzy. He could tell just by the amount of food she had sent up on his dinner tray. She always made and pushed more food when she was stressed, and he couldn’t help but chuckle when he found both a hearty serving of roast beef and a mini chicken pot pie on his plate along with three vegetable side dishes and a side of macaroni and cheese.
He could also guess what had happened to illicit such a response. Thomas had caught up to Jeffers Deknis in his garden and they’d spoken at length about Logan and Patton’s new friend.
There was no way that after said discussion, Jeff had not mentioned Virgil (and more importantly his friendship with Patton) to Helen during their daily gossip sessions. There was also no way that Helen had heard the words “child” and “too small” in a sentence and hadn’t flipped. From there the inevitable sequence of events was clear: Patton went home, Helen talked his ear off until he agreed to bring Virgil to meet her, Helen met him and immediately committed herself to making sure he ate three square meals a day as well as multiple snacks.
Thomas had sussed all of that out before the kitchen worker bringing him his dinner had mentioned what had happened that day.
 That in mind, he decided to wait until after dinner should have been cleaned up before walking his own dinner leftovers down to the kitchens.
Thomas was unsurprised to see Jeff already in the kitchen. He was sat at a small table off to the side where kitchen workers usually took their breaks. The only person other than Jeff and Helen left in the kitchen was a dishwasher who was finishing up. Helen usually spent a couple of hours after dinner in her kitchen or her office organizing for the next day and in case anyone needed food on an off hour, and then there was a night cook who would take over so she could go back to her set of rooms.
 Helen took the tray of leftovers from Thomas herself and shooed the dishwasher out of the way. “I’ll handle the rest myself,” she told the girl. “You can leave.”
She nodded and started to take her apron off. Helen dumped the tray on the counter without care and turned back around to usher Thomas into one of the kitchen chairs. Thomas went willingly and she turned to fill the tea kettle with water and set it on the stove.
“It take it she met Virgil,” Thomas said to Jeff.
“She’s adopted Virgil,” Jeff replied, taking a bite out of a cookie.
 “And what of it?” she asked. “Someone obviously needs to feed the boy. Speaking of, you’re grounding your son by the way.”
Thomas took one of the cookies for himself. “Why am I grounding Logan?” he asked.
“He was worried enough about his health to make him a nutrition potion, but still did not bring him to me,” she harrumphed.
“I see,” Thomas replied.
“In Logan’s defense,” Jeff interrupted. “the boy seems rather timid. He may have worried about you scaring him off.”
Helen slapped him with a dishtowel.
“Actually,” Jeff continued. “From what I’ve gathered he didn’t have contact with anyone since the time I saw him a couple of weeks ago until now.”
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kittybellestark · 4 years
Note
Oops I think I’m late to the ask thing... but what’s your favorite marvel fics that you have read?? You can also add yours btw
It’s never too late, I love answering these questions honestly the more the merrier
EDIT: Link to some other fave’s I recc’d back in November that I also love vvvvv much 
I most definitely will not be adding my own to this list I like my stuff full like a full two minutes and only actually like only one fic that I’ve posted long term so oops but lemme go thru my history and stuff and I’ll get some of my faves lined up
also this took me hours and i wanted to put more but when i was going thru my history you could always tell when i was about to get my monthly visit which is kinda really funny but also made this much harder than it needed to be 
some recent faves of mine is under the cut
Your Heart Changed (Mine Stayed the Same) by  loisselina (LoisSelina)
Peter Parker is back but 5 years into the future and the world has changed. Peter goes home with May only to find she had moved on, with a husband and two kids. Peter struggles to find his place in this new family with a strict step uncle, the longer he's there the harder he finds it to stay on his good side, uncertain if May will believe him.
Contains physical abuse, emotional/verbal abuse, and May Parker being neglectful at the very least.
Notes: I still haven’t read the last two chapter bc I’m not ready for it to be over, it’s really good and I am a sucker for Peter coming back post snap and is put into a bad situation bc no one handled their grief well
You Better Let Somebody Love You (Before It’s Too Late) by ambivilantangst
Tony finds Spider-Man on the roof of his favorite coffee shop.
A few days after Siberia, it hurts to move—to reply to Spider-Man, even, when he tries to talk—but Tony, while irritated, assumes it’s a one-off incident.
It’s not.
Tony keeps leaving the too-quiet Tower for his caffeine fix, Spider-Man keeps popping up against the shop’s heater vent, and as weeks turn into months, Tony finds himself with a new friend. And if Spider-Man is a little dodgy here and there, well, Tony figures everyone’s entitled to their secrets.
//
Or, Tony doesn’t recruit Spider-Man for the Avengers’ Civil War. Maybe if he had, he would’ve caught that something was up with the guy before things went to shit.
Notes: this one is really good. Tony tries to keep Spider-Man at arms length and while having some suspicions about him he respects the secret identity and the friendship they’ve built together. Everyone is hurt and then everyone is healing and i just ugh I love these sort of things
It’s a Secret to Everybody by StarPrince_Punk
“I have kids," Clint said. "I know dad behavior when I see it.” Tony blinked multiple consecutive times, processing the statement. “Excuse me?” “Tony,” Steve said now, “how long have you had a son? And how come we’ve never known about him?” “Yeah,” Clint spoke again, “I thought I was the only one with a secret family. Turns out you’ve had one longer than me!” ------- Peter gets to spend all summer living in Avengers Tower with Tony. When the Rogue Avengers get pardoned and come back to live at the Tower too, they're confused as to who Peter is. However, once they see how Tony acts around Peter, that confusion goes away, as they know for certain who Peter must be - Tony's secret son. Tony and Peter decide to make the most of the situation, and play along. They hope they can keep up the act all summer. But they soon learn that they barely have to act at all.
Notes: This is one of the first multi-chap irondad fics that I read, I had read  one shots before hand, and I mostly read Avengers Found Family and Tony/literally anyone in the avengers pairings before getting into irondad. So it holds a small place in my heart being one of the first multi-chap fics. I love the confusion, the shenanigans the way how everyone is in on the joke except for the avengers and how this made Tony and Peter bond into a father-son relationship. idk im sentimental ig
Body Pillow by The_Winter_Writer
It wasn't a surprise that everyone in the Tower seemed a bit cautious and wary around him. Bucky completely understood. That's why it was a surprise when someone, a very breakable someone, decided the Winter Soldier was an acceptable choice for sleepy cuddling.
Notes: Surprise Shawty it’s Winteriron and not irondad. This is just so cute and I really enjoy the way Bucky doesn’t trust himself and is being ostracized by others and he just is so insecure and accepts that ??? and Tony just rolls in and is like ‘ah yes optimal place to sleep is ontop of you’  like yes tony i too would love to sleep ontop of bucky u right anyways i love my insecure boys they so soft
Chances Missed, Chances Taken by winterbitch (WinterLadyy)
Steve, with Peggy's help, realizes that he's in fact, in love with his best friend who he left back in the present. He decides to go back to him. Only, something went wrong and 3 weeks for him had been 3 years in his present and there's an unhappy surprise waiting for him. Apparently, Bucky is capable of finding new friends himself, and even finding a family... A happiness of his own.
Notes: Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve. His assumptions really come back to bite him in the butt and I don’t really feel as bad for him as I should. I don’t know, maybe I’m cold but he is much more reliant on Bucky then Bucky is on Steve and just, I like that Bucky built a whole life for himself and idk I guess there’s a little part of me that feels satisfaction in the fact that Steve doesn’t get the happy ending he wanted. idk makes me feel like im a lil cold sometimes but i have a love/hate relationship with steve mcu!steve is just so blah yknow 
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melodious-madrigals · 4 years
Text
we should just kiss (like real people do)
hi @misha-winchester, i am your wondertrev secret santa! i hope you had a lovely christmas season/whatever holidays you may celebrate, and i hope you have a very happy new year.
Pairing: Diana Prince/Steve Trevor Words: 8′609 Rating: T (swearing) AO3 tags: Modern Setting/No Powers, co-workers, Fake Dating, ‘and there was only one bed’, Hallmark-movie-esque midsunderstandings, Happy Ending Summary: Etta just invited Steve’s significant other along on their group holiday vacation. The only problem? He made said significant other up to get out of a series of set-ups six months ago, and forgot to set the record straight. Enter Diana, his newest co-worker and real-life crush, who doesn’t have any holiday plans and is somehow offering to help him out.
i have been derelict for too long, but no more! i’m so sorry that it took me so long, and i hope you enjoy this trope-packed fic, because i couldn’t decide on just one, and then it sort of ballooned!
Read it on [AO3] or below the cut.
***
“Shit.” Steve’s head thunks against his desk.
“Problem?”
He looks up to find Diana Prince, the newest legal consultant at their NGO standing in his office door. She’s intimidating and smart and beautiful and possibly also the kindest person he’s ever met, and even though they’re friendly, she’s the last person to whom he wants to admit what’s wrong. But she’s also looking at him with such genuine concern that he spills his guts anyways.
“The last time my friend Etta tried to set me up with someone, I told her I was already dating someone, and now she wants me to bring them on our annual holiday trip to one of our friend’s cabin.” Steve kneads the space between his eyebrows, trying to get rid of the tension headache that’s starting to form.
Diana tilts her head, confused. “That’s kind of her.”
“I’m not actually dating anyone,” Steve clarifies. “I just said it to get her off my back. And now I have to either say I lied—which will not go over well for obvious reasons—or say that I broke up with the person and get all sorts of ‘holiday pity’.”
Diana leans elegantly against his doorframe. “People go their separate ways all the time, no? Besides, maybe it’s a bit soon for a weekend away with friends.”
Steve winces. “It’s possible that I told her this almost six months ago and never corrected the record.”
“Ah,” says Diana, taking the liberty of moving into his office and sitting down across from him. “So it’s rather a large deception then.”
“I didn’t mean for it to get so out of hand? It was just so nice to not have my friends nagging me about my dating life. They’re well intentioned but a little too insistent sometimes.”
“Okay, so telling them is out of the question,” Diana says, very seriously. And—uh-oh, she’s going into problem-solving mode. He’s absolutely mortified that his very capable and very attractive co-worker is taking time to talk with him about this when she’s a literal international human rights lawyer and university lecturer with plenty of other things to be doing. “Hmm. Isn’t that what Craigslist is for?”
“Ha,” says Steve. “I’m never going to be able to get someone to come with me over Christmas on such short notice.”
“Not everyone has plans on Christmas,” Diana argues.
“Yeah, I get that; I’m not even Christian,” says Steve. “But a lot of people still go home because it’s a long holiday.”
“I’m not Christian either and I don’t have any family here in the States. We exist,” Diana jokes.
“Want to be my fake date, then?” The words leave Steve’s mouth before his brain can catch up and tell him what a massively stupid idea that would be, to fake date his real crush, for lack of a better word.
“Yes, alright: if you can’t find someone on Craigslist, I’ll do it,” says Diana, and then before Steve can process: “Anyways, I’m sorry for taking up so much of your time. I just dropped by to give you a hard copy of my revisions. She hands him the legal brief, shoots him a quick smile, and saunters out of his office, apparently unaware of the dazed state she’s left him in.
I’ll do it? Is she serious? For a second, Steve’s mind runs away from him before he shuts it down. She was just being polite; he’s certain of it. There’s no way she wants to give up her days off to go to a cabin in the middle of nowhere with people she doesn’t even know.
Steve reluctantly writes up a quick wanted ad on Craigslist and hits post before he can overthink it. He can definitely do a fake date for the holidays, right? That’s something normal people do.
**
Three days later, he’s gotten a dozen responses to the Craigslist ad, but most of them are variants of either “is this some weird sex thing?” or “can you please post this story on reddit’s r/relationships with an update on how it went because i’m 2000 miles away but very invested in this”. None of them are a real live person that he can take on the trip to meet his friends.
His brain has also been playing Diana’s I’ll do it on repeat pretty much constantly, so on Tuesday evening, after most people have already gone home for the night, he steals himself and wanders down to Diana’s office. If she’s in, he’ll ask. If she’s gone, it’s a sign, and he won’t bring it up.
She’s still there, illuminated only by the glow of her computer and a small desk lamp—the overhead light is turned off and her coat is on, like maybe she was in the process of leaving and then went back to her desk to dash off one email that turned into several.
He taps on the doorframe.
“Steve!” she says, smiling when she sees him. “What a pleasant surprise! Have a seat, I’m just finishing something up. It’ll only be a moment.”  
He smiles nervously and takes one of the chairs opposite her desk, patiently silent as she taps away at her computer.
Three minutes later, she folds her laptop closed and turns the weight of her attention to him.
“Thank you for being patient. What can I do for you?”
“I just—were you serious?”
“Hmm?”
“The other day—were you serious about being my fake date if I couldn’t find someone on Craigslist?”
“I—yes, I was.”
“Wait, really?”  
She shrugs elegantly. “I have no holiday plans.”
“You’re sure.”
She tosses him an amused expression. “I am. It’ll be nice to meet some new people.”
“Right. Well. Can I, uh, buy you dinner or something while we go over the details?”
Diana considers him for a moment. “How does Thai takeout at my place sound?”
“Like a fantastic idea.”
**
On Friday, Steve is extremely antsy. He’s taken a half day, and he and Diana are driving up to Charlie’s cabin after her lecture lets out.
She’s in a good mood when he picks her up, and the ensuing discussion crosses a half a dozen different topics. He doesn’t think they’ve ever had a boring conversation, and they’re more than halfway there before Steve remembers that he wanted to run through the basics of their fake-dating mandate again.
“I’ve never really been much for PDA,” he says, “so they won’t be surprised if we’re not particularly demonstrative. A little hand-holding and casual touching here and there and we’ll be fine.”
“Yes,” replies Diana, amused rather than annoyed. “You mentioned this the other day.”
“Did I? I guess I’m just nervous.” He’s already feeling a little guilty about lying to his friends (again), and he’s suddenly wondering if he’s capable of pulling it off.
“They asked me to invite you—er, my significant other—to a dinner in October. I don’t think it’ll come up, but—”
“I spent a week of October in Europe, and have plenty of university functions to attend,” Diana reassures him. “Saying I was busy that night probably isn’t even a lie, and besides, that was months ago. Take a breath; this will be okay.”
“I’m just rethinking this,” huffs Steve.
“You’re welcome to tell them I’m just a friend that needed a place to stay for the holidays,” Diana offers calmly.
“No. No, I’m committed to the lie now.”
“Okay. Then let’s do this. I’m here for you, you know.”
“Yeah,” says Steve, glancing over at her in the passenger seat before turning his attention back to the road. “Thanks.”
**
They’re the last ones to arrive to the cabin, because everyone else was able to take the full day off, so they walk into a full house.
“Oh, it’s so lovely to finally meet you!” exclaims Etta, pulling Diana into a hug before they’ve barely gotten in the door.
“You must be Etta,” Diana says, once she’s been let go. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Hey, Etta,” Steve says, pulling her in for his own hug.
“Everyone else is in the living room.”
They make their way down the hall, towards the sound of all the voices.
“Steve!” yells Sameer from across the room when they round the corner. A cheer goes up—it’s possible that some of them have already had a glass or two of wine—and Steve pulls Diana forward to introduce her.
“Everyone, this is Diana. Diana, this is Napi, Charlie, Etta’s wife Adrienne, Sameer, and Sameer’s fiancée Noor.”
“It’s so lovely to meet all of you,” says Diana, moving forward to shake hands and give hugs, along with Steve.
“You’ll want to drop off your luggage in your room, I’m sure,” Etta declares forcefully, shooing them back out of the room once they’re done with the greetings.
“Alright, alright, we’re going,” acquiesces Steve.
“Well, dinner will be done shortly, and I’m sure you’re hungry. Best get settled in before you go into a food coma.”
“Stop making sense,” he snarks, but they all know he’s joking.
“Second door on the left!” calls Etta after him, as they traipse up the stairs. There’s a niggling in his brain about this room, because he’s been in it once and it’s—
“Shit,” says Steve under his breath upon entering the room, because it’s one of the rooms with a single queen bed instead of two twins.
“Is there something wrong with the room?” asks Diana, a step behind him. “I’m sure we can fix it, whatever it is.”
“No, it’s just—I didn’t even think about this,” says Steve, gesturing at the bed. “Usually when I come, I’m in a different room with Charlie or Napi.”
Diana surveys the space in front of them. “You mean the bed?” Her nose wrinkles. “Are you really that uncomfortable sharing?”
“I—no, of course I’m not. I just didn’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“Well then, that’s settled. I am not uncomfortable. Which side do you prefer?”
Of course it’s not a big deal. Right. He’s making too much out of this because he might—possibly—have feelings. But for Diana, it’s just two adults sharing a bed, which is perfectly natural. But now she’s looking at him expectantly, which makes him realize—“Uh, left, I guess.”
The way she smiles, he gets the distinct impression that his answer has pleased her, that he’s chosen correctly, if such a thing is possible. (He thinks, stupidly, that he would do quite a lot to chase that smile.)
Meanwhile, Diana drops her duffel on the right side of the bed.
“Do you mind if I change quickly before dinner?”
“Yeah, no, of course. I’ll just be downstairs.”
Steve heads back downstairs and pauses in the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face.
He can definitely share a bed with Diana. They’re adults. It’s not strange, and it’s not romantic. It’s just two people sharing a sleeping space because there are not enough beds.
He reenters the living room to find Charlie and Sameer in the middle of an argument about who’s the better cross-country skier while Noor, Adrienne, and Etta chat over a cup of tea and Napi watches over several pots in the kitchen.
“The answer, of course, is neither of you. Noor is the best skier here.”
Charlie squawks indignantly, and Sameer laughs. “That she is.”
“Can someone set the table?” asks Napi. “Dinner is about to be ready.”
Steve, as the closest one to the kitchen, pulls out the plates and silverware and starts setting up the table, while the others slowly drift towards the dining area.
And then there’s a gentle pressure on his elbow. “Can I help with anything?” asks Diana, softly, and when he turns, he feels the air knocked out of him.
Diana is all comfort, in simple black leggings and a chunky winter sweater instead of her usual pristine business wear, but she’s all the more beautiful for the casualness. Her face, too, is wiped clean of standard makeup and her hair is down, and he realizes that she has freckles. They’re faint, just the slightest smattering over her nose and cheeks, but Steve is close enough to see them, and for a second he wants to touch them, trace them into constellations.
Then he realizes he’s staring and jumps a little, moving to rearrange the plate in front of him.  
“You could, uh, fold the napkins, I guess? There isn’t really a whole lot to do.”
They work in tandem as the rest of the crew files in, loud and boisterous as they dish out their meals.
“So, Diana,” says Etta, once everyone is settled in their seats, “tell us all about yourself! Steve’s been so tight-lipped about you that I was starting to think you didn’t exist.”
Steve almost chokes on his wine, but Diana doesn’t so much as flinch, simply smiling at Etta and saying, “Well, I’m not sure what you’d like to know, but I’m originally from one of the Grecian islands and I completed my studies in the UK. Right now, I’m splitting my time between the US and the Netherlands.”
“Oh, what part of the Netherlands?” asks Noor. “Sameer and I both lived there, at different points!”
“Just the Hague, I’m afraid,” says Diana ruefully, because it’s not known for its charms.
“Diana’s on a prosecutorial team at the International Criminal Court,” Steve clarifies, which prompts a number of impressed looks all around the table.
“We’re in between cases right now,” Diana says, “and we’re only just starting to file some pre-trial motions for the next thing on our docket, so I took a position as a guest lecturer here in the States. A friend of mine convinced me to take the consulting position at the ARGUS Foundation since it’s not full-time.” When Diana pauses, she notices a number of raised eyebrows around the table. “I think the expression in English is ‘I wear a lot of hats’,” she jokes.
“She’s a wonder,” interjects Steve easily, and he doesn’t even have to work at the soft look that he gives her. (He’ll interrogate the fact that it’s just how he looks at her later, when he’s alone and can have a nice little panic about it.)
“I just like to have purpose,” says Diana, and then Noor asks her about her last case, and the conversation takes on a life of its own.
Diana, as he suspected, gets on well with his friends, fitting in as though she’s known them years instead of hours, and they migrate into the living room after dinner, talking and laughing into the late hours of the evening.
“They are all lovely,” Diana tells him the moment the door to their room has closed behind them.
“They’re okay,” says Steve, but his face is pulled up in a smile, and Diana just laughs. He’s spent all evening getting to look at her whenever he wants, and even though they’re alone, even though there’s no need for his eyes to keep finding her, he doesn’t want to pull them away.
“They’re all so interesting!” Diana exclaims. “Sameer and I talked about linguistics for a full half an hour, and Etta and Adrienne’s stories are incredible!”
That makes him laugh. “Yeah, Etta’s something else.”
They talk a little more as they get ready for bed, and finally there’s nothing more to do but turn out the light and get under the covers. Steve’s tired enough that he thinks he has a decent shot at falling asleep, but he feels a little awkward as they both shift carefully on their respective sides.
“Hey,” he whispers into the deepness of the silky black night. “Thank you again for being here.”
“It is my pleasure.”
He listens to Diana’s breathing quickly even out, and though it takes him a little longer, he too falls asleep without too much trouble, despite her nearness.
**
To his great relief, or maybe to his great disappointment, they wake up in almost the exact same positions that they fell asleep in, on completely opposite sides of the bed.
“Good morning,” says Diana softly, hair slightly mussed and eyes still a little heavy with sleep, and frankly Steve’s not sure how he’s going to make it through the rest of the trip, because he likes her so much and also doesn’t want to impose his feelings.
“Good morning. I hope you’re ready for another insane day.”
“Once I’ve had some coffee, absolutely.”
“Well then,” says Steve, “let’s get you some coffee.”
Coffee is followed by breakfast, which is chaotic because everyone is up at slightly different times and traditionally, they fend for themselves for breakfast which means in practice that half a dozen people end up doing things in the kitchen at the same time.
The rest of the day is no calmer, as they all pack themselves up and spill outside for a snowy hike that lasts most of the afternoon. Diana, Etta, and Napi establish themselves as the fastest hikers early on, and they sort of naturally split into two groups. The whole group meets back up at one of the lookout points, where the faster group has lingered to let the rest catch up.
Steve uses the viewpoint to check in with Diana. “You doing okay?”
When she turns to him, her cheeks are rosy with exertion, her breath is coming out in silvery puffs in the cold air, and her eyes are dancing. “Excellent, you?”
“Really good.” They take in the snowy view in front of them. “Hey, I didn’t mean to leave you on your own,” Steve says, suddenly feeling a little awkward.
Diana snorts. “I appreciate the sentiment, but I was the one that walked ahead of you. If I’d been bothered, I wouldn’t have split off with Napi and Etta.”
“Right, of course.” He feels a bit stupid; she’s never struck him as the type to do something she really didn’t want to.
“We should probably walk back together though. For appearances.” She winks at him, and before he can respond, Noor is at his elbow.
“Can I take a picture for you two?”
“That would be great,” says Diana, handing Noor her phone as she slips her arm around his waist.
Pictures are snapped, and then they’re headed back down the trail. Steve ends up so engrossed in his conversation with Diana that the rest of the group fades away, and on the last straightway after they’ve descended, Diana reaches out and casually links their hands. Even through their gloves, it’s a giddy feeling.
**
That night after dinner, Steve steps outside for a moment of respite from the noisiness of the cabin. He breathes deeply, and stares at the patch of sky not covered in clouds, picking out a familiar constellation.
“Diana’s wonderful.”
Steve looks up from where he was leaning against the balcony railing to find that Etta has joined him outside.
“Yeah, she’s pretty great,” Steve agrees.
“I’m sorry you didn’t feel comfortable introducing us earlier,” says Etta so sincerely that Steve feels a squirming guilt welling up. “But if this was the pace you needed to go to be sure of your relationship, to make it solid and lasting, I’m glad you took the space to do so.”
“Right,” Steve echoes.
“Seriously, Steve,” says Etta, touching his arm, so that he’s almost forced to look at her. “You and Diana are so well-suited, and she’s good for you—I’ve never seen you like this.”
“What’s this?”
Etta contemplates him a moment. “You’re happy,” she says simply, and Steve rolls his eyes, because if Etta thinks just being in a relationship equates to—“but it’s not just that. You’re…still. Calm. You’ve usually got this frenetic, discontented energy, and with Diana it’s quieted.”  
It makes Steve pause, but before he can say anything—refute her or maybe, heaven forbid, agree with her—Diana herself is bursting onto the balcony.
“There you are!” she exclaims, wrapping her arms around him from the back, and fuck, maybe it is his instinct to relax in the split second before he remembers that this is all an act. “Charlie says we’re roasting marshmallows over the fire, and I’m told that you have the technique perfected,” she says, with all the exuberant glee of a child.
Steve pointedly ignores the knowing, indulgent look on Etta’s face as he turns in Diana’s arms to face her, a small but unquashable smile on his face. “That’s a classic holiday tradition for us—I was wondering when Charlie was going to break them out. Have you ever had a s’more?”
“No, but I’m looking forward to it!”
“Well, then we can’t let Sameer or Etta roast yours; they always burn them.”
“It’s meant to be eaten with a little char,” says Etta.
“Absolutely not!” Steve doesn’t have time to say any more, because Diana has laced her hand in his and his gently tugging him toward the interior.
“Right. This is an American classic and you’re gonna love it.”
After making her the perfect marshmallow—gold and toasty, and soft all the way through without being burned—the rest of the night is spent roasting increasingly silly things over the coals and drinking copious amounts of hot chocolate and eggnog that are optionally spiked, utterly warm and cozy.
“Tell me something about yourself,” requests Diana, when they’re tucked into bed later, still on their own sides but far closer together than they were the night before.
“Like what?”
“Something—well, not something secret, if you don’t want to. But something that most people probably don’t know.”
Steve considers her for a moment, shifting so that he’s facing her, the moon providing just enough light that he can see the contours of her face. “I wanted to be a pilot.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I wanted to be a fighter pilot.”
Diana grins. “I can see that. What stopped you?”
“I decided I wouldn’t really be helping people, and helping people is what I wanted to do. What about you?”  
“What did I want to be?”
“No, just—anything.”
“Hmm,” says Diana. “My favorite childhood memories are those of my aunt, Antiope.”
“Was she the cool aunt who spoiled you rotten?”
“She was the aunt that got me up at six in the morning every day to train.”
“Wow, that’s neat, I guess,” Steve deadpans, and Diana laughs in the darkness, rolling onto her side so that she’s facing him, so that they’re almost nose to nose.
“She was also more indulgent than my mother, yes.”
“I think we have very different definitions of indulgent,” says Steve.
“Perhaps,” says Diana, and despite how late it is, they spend another hour or two trading secrets in the darkness before falling asleep. Steve learns, among other things, that she loves cherries more than any other fruit, that she’d rather take the metro than a cab any day of the week, that she played the harp for a while and misses playing music but not playing the instrument itself. When they finally drift off to sleep, it’s still facing each other, fingers inches apart.
**
Steve wakes up feeling incredibly comfortable and very cozy. It’s only when he stretches a little that he realizes that the warm weight against his chest is not his blanket, but Diana. During the night, they must have migrated into each other, because now that his brain is coming back online, Steve realizes that not only is Diana tucked into his chest, but their legs are twined together. His shifting causes her to stir a little, but only to nuzzle against him a little before settling.
This is fine; he’s not freaking out. Not about how they’re accidentally pressed together, or about how much he likes her, or about what any of this means. Not about lines blurring and becoming harder to make out, not about lying to his friends. He’s fine.
Taking a breath, he weighs his options. He can wait for Diana to wake up and pretend he’s still asleep, and let her figure out how to react, or he can try to extricate himself now. Although it might wake her up, and then it would be doubly awkward, and—
And he’s waited too long in deciding, because Diana stretches a little sleepily and then blinks her eyes open, looking up at him.
“Good morning,” she says, apparently unbothered by their position. It’s making him spiral in confusion, and want, because it would be so easy to lean forward and kiss her, but neither has she directly expressed interest in him romantically, so he’s not about to actually do it.
“Did you sleep well?” asks Diana, gently untangling herself and sitting up.
Now that Steve thinks about it, he realizes that he’s slept better than he has in ages.
“Yeah,” he affirms a little hoarsely. “You?”
“Very well.” He’s considering saying something else—anything else, maybe apologizing for how closely they slept or, alternatively, telling her he adores her—when she continues, “How do you think everyone would feel about quiche?”
“Quiche?”
“One of the few reliable things I can cook,” says Diana, “but I have a good recipe, and I’m quite certain we have everything I’d need.”
Steve blinks. “I think it’d go over well.”
“Perfect!” Diana slips out of bed, sliding across the room with more of her infectious energy as she gathers her clothing for the day.
By the time Steve gets downstairs post-shower, Diana’s got the crust rolled out and blind-baking and has a number of veggies sautéing.
“Oh, good, you’re here! Can you pass me the mushrooms?” she asks, and he obliges, then takes it upon himself to crumble the cheese for her.
“Do you cook a lot?” he asks, and then curses himself, glancing around to make sure they’re alone and that nobody heard what was clearly a question that he, by all rights, should know the answer to. Blessedly, the only other person up is Napi, and he’s out on the porch.
“Not if I can help it,” says Diana. “You?”
“I enjoy it,” says Steve.
“Enjoy what?” asks Sameer, who’s just come down the stairs.
“Passing me ingredients when I tell him to,” teases Diana, successfully covering up what may have been a slip-up, because Sameer just rolls his eyes.
“You two are ridiculous.”
“More like adorable,” says Etta, who has apparently also been summoned by the smell of brewing coffee. “By the way—how did you two start dating? I’ve been meaning to ask since I never heard the story from this one”—she gestures at Steve—“and I’m sure it’s equally adorable.”
Steve can’t believe they’ve come this far without being asked, and that they didn’t do a better job of anticipating this question. He’s about to bumble his way through a response, but Diana, who is now pouring the egg mixture into the pan, has it covered.
“It’s sweet to me because it is ours, but I think you’ll otherwise find it quite boring. My third day of work, I came to his office by accident, looking for another colleague, and we traded a couple of jokes. Two days later, a bunch of people from the office went out for drinks after work, and I ran into Steve again. We spent a lot of the evening chatting, and when we left for the evening, he walked me to my train, and as we were waiting on the platform, he asked me out. He was kind and funny and handsome; there was no reason not to say yes.”
For a moment, Steve feels like he’s been hit by a train, because that’s actually how they met. They did spend an evening chatting, and he did wait on the platform with her. The only bit that didn’t happen was the asking out, and now he wonders what might have happened if he had. Then he reminds himself that it’s all an act, and she’s supposed to be acting like she likes him. He’s getting reality confused with the little mirage they’ve created.
“—it is sweet though,” Etta is saying when he snaps back to attention, unsure of just how much he’s missed.
“Yes, Steve is very thoughtful,” says Diana fondly.
He doesn’t really get a chance to ask her about it, because soon everyone is crowded around the table for breakfast, and that quickly turns into a card game, where they get separated by a few seats. It all somehow blends into lunch, as people swap in and out, Sameer and Noor doing the cooking, this meal, with Adrienne flitting in and out to help as she puts up a few extra lights for tonight’s Christmas eve celebration. He tries not to think about it too much, because Diana looks like she’s having a good time, and he is too, and eventually he gets swept up in the game, focusing on counting trump and keeping track of tricks and arguing genially with Charlie about who may or may not be cheating.
**
“Steve.” Diana pulls him aside after lunch, tugging him into their room.
“What’s up?” She looks entirely too serious, and it worries him. Is this about their story? Is something wrong?
“First kisses are always a bit awkward,” she says bluntly.
It’s so out of the blue that Steve’s brain doesn’t even short-circuit. He just blinks. “Yeah, usually.”
“Well, I just saw Adrienne putting mistletoe up. Your friends are wonderful people, but if we don’t get caught under it naturally, they’ll make sure we do.”
She’s got his friends pegged; that’s absolutely how they operate.
“They’ll recognize something is off if we’ve never kissed. I think we need to practice.”
Now Steve’s brain short-circuits.
“Practice.”
“It’s the only way to make sure it’s not during an ambush.” Her eyes are wide and she’s very close, so close that one of them could erase the distance without even taking a step, but she’s paused, waiting.
Waiting to see if it’s okay, if she has his consent.
His thoughts flick back, inexplicably, to this morning. (Was it really just this morning that they woke up tangled together? It seems a week ago already.) Knowing what it’s like to kiss her will probably explode his brain, but not knowing is worse. He nods, just a fraction, words caught in his throat, and then she’s closed the distance and pressed her lips to his.
Fireworks are for dramatic novels, but the world still shifts on its axis. It’s soft and slow, exploratory, but the pressure is somehow just right, and it consumes him. It’s everything he never let himself imagine it would be, and more. When she eventually pulls away—seconds, minutes, hours later, he’s not sure—he chases her lips for a moment before remembering himself, marshalling his reaction and pulling away in equal measure.
“Right, so. No mistletoe first kiss,” he manages, because seriously, what the fuck, he’s never had a first kiss feel that natural, that right.
“Mission accomplished,” says Diana faintly. “I think we’ll be fine.”
“Fine,” Steve echoes, and he thinks he sees Diana’s gaze flick back to his lips, dark and heavy, but then there’s the pounding of feet on the stairs and shouts outside their room.
“Steve! Diana! Are you in for another round of cards before we start the movie marathon?”
Diana startles, and takes three steps back, smoothing down her hair, her shirt, before opening the door to find Adrienne there, looking at them expectantly.
“Yes, of course,” says Diana.
“Oh,” smirks Adrienne, giving them a once over. “I can come back.”
“No, it’s alright. I’ll come down now; I want to get a cup of tea before we start up again. Steve?”
“I—yeah, a cup of tea would be great. Black tea—”
“—with a dash of honey, I know,” she says fondly, as if this is old news and not something she’s clearly picked up in the last day and a half.
“Thanks.”
When he collects himself and comes downstairs a few minutes later, he spots Diana across the room, head thrown back in laughter as she chats with Napi over the kettle.
She fits, he thinks. He’s seen her in professional settings, being diplomatic even when she doesn’t want to be, but here, she’s relaxed, and from everything she’s said, she likes his friends as much as they like her. Isn’t it sort of everyone’s dream that the person they like gets along with their friends?      
He takes another second to try to untangle his thoughts before he gets ushered back into the fold and has to pretend that everything is uncomplicated.
**
Christmas day dawns bright and cold, and sees, for the second day in a row, Diana snuggled into Steve. Despite another meandering conversation in the dark—in which he absolutely chickened out of asking her about the backstory she created for them, or the kiss—and starting the night on different sides of the bed, they seem to have rolled together in their sleep, and if he didn’t wake up with an absolutely parched throat, Steve would’ve probably gone right back to sleep, enjoying the warmth. Instead, he extricates himself gently, and by the time he gets back to the room a few minutes later, Diana is up and dressed, dashing any plans he might’ve been entertaining for a bit of a lie-in.
As with most things on their holiday trips, the day is centered around food. There’s a huge brunch, and then a little foray outside—nothing like the hike the day before yesterday, just a little walk that turns into a snow angel contest—and then it’s back inside to start cooking Christmas dinner. It’s Etta and Charlie taking point, because, as Steve explains to Diana, the group rule for any and all holidays is that those who observe do the traditional cooking, and everybody else takes care of the clean-up.
At one point in the afternoon, a trivia game gets pulled out, and in a classic showdown of boys (Steve, Sameer, Napi) vs. girls (Diana, Noor, Adrienne), the ladies trounce them thoroughly. There’re plenty of mimosas and someone starts a Christmas playlist, and honestly, Steve can’t think of a better Christmas in a long, long time.
They don’t really exchange ‘real’ gifts, but they do have a long-standing tradition of an intense game of White Elephant, which happens after dinner.
No less than 4 items (a succulent in a corgi-shaped pot, a coffee mug with some gratuitously dirty language on it, a pair of wool socks with Munch’s The Scream emblazoned on them, and an umbrella patterned with cartoon gentleman amongst the raindrops so that it’s always raining men) get stolen so many times that they hit the limit. (Diana walks away the proud owner of the socks, thanks to a strategic steal by Steve, which sets her up to steal them for the last time.)
The mood is so light that Steve has almost forgotten that this isn’t quite real, that he’s lying to his friends and sort of lying to Diana, too. That comes crashing down when they bump into each other coming back into the living room.
See, Steve and Diana had managed to casually avoid the newly strung up mistletoe all of Christmas Eve and most of Christmas day—at least together, that is; at one point Steve finds himself under the mistletoe with Sameer, and they both dramatically grip each other for a theatre kiss—by sheer luck, but their luck runs out after White Elephant. Steve has gone into the kitchen to deposit an empty tray of food, and Diana is on her way back from the bathroom, and they collide in the doorframe.
Instinctively, Steve puts a hand out, touching the small of her back lightly to anchor himself and steady her. It’s just a casual touch, but he lingers a second too long.
“Oooh, look! Steve and Diana are under the mistletoe!” sings Adrienne, pointing from across the room.
Steve glances up automatically, as though maybe Adrienne might be wrong, even though he knows damn well that there’s mistletoe hanging there.
“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” chants Etta, clearly a little tipsy, and the rest of his asshole friends join in the chant.
Steve’s eyes flick to Diana’s, and she raises an eyebrow, inclines her head almost imperceptibly. It’s permission, so he leans in and gives her a quick kiss, their lips barely touching. He’s not sure he can handle more in front of his friends right now, not with all of the emotions pooling in his stomach.
“Boo!” yells Charlie. “You and Sameer had a better kiss than that!”
There’s general clamoring of assent, and Diana reaches out and cups a hand to his cheek, to a great whoop from someone in their little peanut gallery. “If you are uncomfortable, we do not have to do this,” Diana murmurs, low and close enough that only he can hear it.
The real problem is that Steve wants little more than to kiss her again, but he feels guilty about it.
“It’s okay.”
She searches his eyes for a moment, and then closes the rest of the distance, kissing him properly. He sinks into it, and relishes in the little gasp he elicits when he deepens the kiss just a little. It’s the catcalling that splits them apart, and he’s sure he looks a little shell-shocked.
“That’s a kiss!” hollers Adrienne.
To his surprise, Diana doesn’t immediately move away from him, but stays tucked into his side, blushing a little.
“You’re all just a little too invested in our love life,” she admonishes lightly, but the point is missed as Etta launches into a bit of a ramble about how Steve introduced her to Adrienne by accident and how she’s been looking to return the favor, but that she’s glad Diana is here.
Steve watches Diana go a bit pink again, and wants to pull her aside, try to clear some things up, but then there’s another round of mulled wine, and they settle in for one last Christmas movie before the day ends.
Diana goes to bed before Steve does, while he stays back to have another round with Charlie, and by the time he realizes that he wanted to talk to her alone, she’s fast asleep.
**
The morning of the twenty-sixth is chaotic from the start; Diana’s up and out of bed before Steve wakes up, and then everyone is scrambling to pack up before they all drive back to the city. This time, Diana and Steve have got Sameer and Noor with them, because they came with Napi, who’s leaving directly to visit some extended family, and Etta and Adrienne don’t have enough room because they’re Charlie’s ride. It’s a pleasant ride, and Noor, Sameer, and Diana spend a solid half hour swapping in and out of Arabic to tease Steve, who does speak three languages himself, but doesn’t count darija as one of them.
They drop Noor and Sameer off with promises of seeing them at Etta’s party on New Year’s Eve, at the very latest, and suddenly they’re alone again.
“Thank you again for doing this,” says Steve. “You were the best fake date I could’ve asked for.”
“It was my pleasure,” says Diana. “I had a really good time, and a fun holiday.”
“And you really don’t mind putting in an appearance at the New Year’s Eve party?”
“Not at all. I’m actually looking forward to it.”
“Good; I think everyone is looking forward to having you there.”
They’re quiet as they pull up to Diana’s building.
Before Diana can move to get out of the car, Steve takes a deep breath. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course, anything.” Her wide eyes are trained on him, and he almost loses his nerve.
But it’s now or never; he has to know if this is just him or if she feels something too. “If I had asked you out, that night on the platform, would you have said yes?” It feels like the safest version of the question he wants to ask.
Diana doesn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
It knocks the wind out of him and is simultaneously one of the best things he’s ever heard, because maybe that means there’s still time to make a proper go of it.
“Do you—”
He’s cut off by Diana leaning forward and kissing him sweetly, and he instinctively pulls her a little closer, deepens the kiss without consciously thinking about it.
“Sorry, I interrupted you,” says Diana, biting back a smile when they eventually pull apart, breathless. It makes Steve laugh, and he can’t fight the grin that’s also building. There’s no one around to fool, no one around even to prepare for; this is just them.
“Do you want to come to mine for dinner tonight?” Steve asks, bubbling with a profound sort of happiness. “For a real date this time?”
“I would love that,” says Diana, grinning. “No tricks, no fake backstories. Just us.”
“That’s the best thing I’ve heard all day.”
“Just give me a couple of hours to shower and change and answer a couple of emails?” Diana says.
“How does seven sound? I’ll cook.”
“I can’t wait.”
He watches her go, almost floating from how giddy he feels. As he drives home, he mentally goes over what he’ll need to get for the meal he wants to make. Truly, it was the best fake date ever; he might, he thinks, even consider posting the story of it to the r/relationships thread like one of the Craigslist messages asked, because it’s so wonderfully peculiar.
**
“Right on time!” says Steve with a grin when Diana knocks on his door that evening for their date.
His smile falls when he notices her face, tired and serious, despite how light it had been only hours ago.
“Steve, I have to go,” she says without preamble.
“What?”
“I’m flying back to the Netherlands tonight.” What? That can’t be right; she’s not due back for several months, and even that’s only a trip. Steve’s brain lags a second and then realizes she’s still talking, dark eyes all apologies. “—straight to the airport from here, actually. I just came by to say goodbye. It seemed like the sort of thing that should be done in person.”
“But what—”
“You know who Patrick Morgan is, yes?”
Of course he knows who Patrick Morgan is; he’s a war criminal who was only caught and extradited recently. It made waves when jurisdiction was given over to the ICC, at least among the relevant international communities.
“The war criminal?” he asks, just to confirm.
Diana nods. “That’s the one. Look, I’m not really meant to be talking about my cases, but I’m on the prosecutorial team and his lawyers are good. They’re trying to file a pre-trial motion that would—well, let’s just say it would be bad if the judge ruled in their favor. We’re scrambling and I’m needed back at the office, in person.”
“Shit.” There’s nothing else to say, really. She’s the one who can make sure Patrick Morgan doesn’t hurt anyone else, and that’s that.
“It’s awful timing,” whispers Diana, and there’s true regret in her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“No, don’t apologize. You’re doing what has to be done.”
“I wish it didn’t,” says Diana. “I wanted to—I don’t know, go on a proper date and go to your friends’ New Year’s party with you, and this has just—it’s mucked it all up, hasn’t it?”
“An understatement,” says Steve, laughing wetly. Maybe—
“I have to call the ARGUS Foundation from the car, get everything squared away in regards to my commitments there. Gods, this is such a nightmare.” Diana’s pacing now, and Steve can see all their possibilities slipping away, now that she’s returning to the Netherlands. It’s not the most important thing, this casualty of what could have been, but it still breaks a little piece of Steve’s heart all the same.
“I wish we had more time,” says Steve, a little bittersweet, because there’s not much else to say. Diana sends him a sad smile and nods.
“I really have to go. I might even miss my flight as it is.”
“Right, of course.”
She looks at him hesitantly for a moment, like she’s going to say something more, and then pulls him into a hug. As she pulls back, she kisses him softly. It feels like goodbye more than any words could.
Then her phone rings, and she looks at him apologetically one more time, a quick, “I’m sorry,” before taking her leave and answering it. He hears her frustrated Dutch echoing down the hall as she walks away.
After she leaves, he feels a little aimless, and a little numb. It doesn’t quite sink in that Diana is gone, but he does think, absently, that something bad was bound to happen, because nothing catastrophic happened over the holidays—no real fights, no disastrous weather; it all went too smoothly.
**
The next few days are a slog: he’s back in the office, technically, but everything has slowed down substantially in between the holidays, just enough to not really keep him occupied.
It scares him a little how much he misses Diana. They were sort-of friends before the fake-dating charade, more friendly-coworkers than anything, but he got used to her being a part of his daily life absurdly quickly and is having a hard time adjusting back. They could have been something spectacular, he knows, if circumstances hadn’t made it impossible.
She texts him when she lands, and he’s glad to know she’s made it safely, but it ignites a fresh wave of ache such that he’s almost glad she doesn’t answer his text back, or text again. He ends up ignoring his phone, mostly, trying to distract himself from thinking about what wasn’t meant to be. (It’s bad luck with fate: if they’d had more time, if they were something real, he might consider moving, but it’s too soon, too early, even if he thinks he might already love her.)
On New Year’s Eve, he spends most of the day cooking, Netflix on in the background, whiling away time before the party Etta and Adrienne are throwing.
“Where’s Diana?” asks Etta, when she opens the door and finds Steve there, alone, carrying three tiers of Tupperware and a bottle of champagne, because of course she does. All his friends adore Diana too.
“She had to fly back to the Netherlands for a case,” says Steve morosely, unable to say anymore because he might choke up, and crying is fine but not during a New Year’s Eve party.
“Oh, what a shame she’ll miss New Year’s! When is she coming back?”
The fresh, stricken look on Steve’s face tells Etta everything she needs to know. “Oh, luv, I’m so sorry. I know long distance isn’t easy.”
It’s the perfect excuse presenting itself, really. In a month, Steve can say that the distance was too much, and Etta will understand, and that will be that. He’ll be out of this lie, too, with no one the wiser that it started as a fake thing. But right now, Steve is still mourning the fact that it never got to be anything real in the first place.
“It is what it is,” says Steve, trying for a smile.
“Well,” says Etta, also going for something resembling cheery. “We’ve got plenty of alcohol and a place for you to crash tonight, if you want it.”
“Thanks, Etta.”
He whiles away the night nursing a glass of wine and floating amongst friends and acquaintances, trying to enjoy the merriment. Etta, bless her, must spread the word that Diana had to leave for work, because only Noor asks after her, right after he gets inside. After that, he doesn’t have to answer any further questions, and instead focuses on the laughter and brightness radiating from his friends.
At a few minutes to midnight, he slips off to a quiet corner, not quite ready to face the rowdy, kissing couples.
Somewhere behind him, the apartment door slams, and there’s something of a commotion, but he doesn’t bother to investigate until—
“Did I make it in time?” asks a breathless voice.
Steve turns, and there, standing in front of him, a vision in a bright red coat, is Diana.
“But how—?” She’s meant to be in Europe, but she’s very much not. She’s here.
She’s here.
“We finished a little early and I got the first flight out. I took a cab from the airport to get here as fast as I could.”
“You hate cabs,” says Steve helplessly, fixating on something that’s very much not the point because it’s one of the many strange things they talked about, and because it’s somehow easier to focus on than any other part of it.  
“I wanted to be here.” Her eyes are twinkling, and Steve can’t quite believe she’s here, on New Year’s Eve, and—shit.
“But what about the case?”
“We got the motion thrown out,” she exclaims, delight lacing her words. “We’re proceeding as scheduled. I’ll have to go back for a bit starting in May, but—”
That phrasing catches Steve’s attention. “Wait, you’re not moving back to the Netherlands permanently?”
“What?” asks Diana, looking genuinely perplexed. “No! It was just a business trip, inconveniently timed. I was never moving back. Did you think—”  
“I thought—” says Steve, at the exact same time.  
There’s a look of recognition on Diana’s face, as if she’s doing the maths, going back over the conversations they had once more in her head. She bites her lip, shakes her head. Laughs.
“We are both a bit stupid, I think,” she says. “I was never going to be gone more than a week or two, but I suppose I didn’t make that clear enough. I thought it was just bad timing, since we were starting something, but you—”
Steve shakes his head, incredulous. “I thought I might never see you again, but you’re really here.”
Diana reaches out and ever so softly touches his cheek. “Yes. So, did I miss the countdown?”
Steve stops fighting the smile that’s building. “Nope. And you know, they say whatever you’re doing at midnight you’ll be doing for the rest of the year.”
“Do they? You’d best choose wisely, then.”
“I’ve got an idea.” The countdown hasn’t started yet, but he leans in slowly anyways, because he figures they’ve wasted enough time. She meets his lips eagerly, and in the background, Steve can hear Etta’s whoop of excitement, but really, the only thing that matters is Diana, and the feel of her lips underneath his.
It’s just as earth-shaking as it was the first few times, but they break apart momentarily as the countdown actually begins from the other room. When midnight hits, they kiss again, a little shorter this time, their smiles too wide to make it a proper kiss.
“Happy New Year, Steve,” whispers Diana, forehead pressed to his.
“Happy New Year,” he echoes. An endless plurality of shifting possibilities stretch before them, elastic and hopeful, and very real once more. From the other room, the chords of a piano start, a telltale sign that Charlie has started his traditional rendition of Auld Lang Syne.
“You know, eventually people are going to realize our anniversary isn’t in July.”
That elicits another giddy laugh, because somehow, he’s gotten lucky enough that this is his reality. “Yeah, but that’s a pretty good problem to have, all things considered. I wouldn’t change a thing.”
“No,” says Diana thoughtfully. “I wouldn’t either.”
***
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