#because the point of burnout is telling you what's not working so I'm trying to learn from it and work better with myself

[moonstruckme]

I’ve been binge reading your emt polymarauders. And I gotta tell you ! It’s like sipping a nice lemonade on a summer day. Oh my…

I’m a medical student so I loooooove this prompt so much. I couldn’t sleep tonight because biochemistry has been rotting my brain. Ugh

Anyways,

I had an idea, could you maybe make a reader who’s in her first year of med school and she’s so stressed. The boys try to ease her a little but she doesn’t listen and itch closer to burnout. Until she starts to feel unwell and comes out of her study to drink water. But before she can react she passes out and the boys rush to help.

(Totally not happened to me once in front of almost 30 3rd years. Nooooo.)

Hope you like the idea ❤️

Thanks babe, I'm glad you enjoy them! And thank you for requesting <3

cw: academic stress, fainting

emt!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

“What nerve supplies the posterior arm and forearm?” Remus asks you. 

The words are beginning to sound like gibberish. “The, um…the radial nerve.” 

“Well done.” Remus sets your flash card atop a stack. There are three of them, ones you know well, ones you’re still shaky on, and ones you’ve not got a clue about. This card goes in the first stack. It’s small enough that every addition feels like a victory. 

Your boyfriends have been kind enough to bring you lunch at the library. It was quickly revealed as a plot to try and coax you into taking a break, but when that clearly wasn’t working they decided to stay awhile and keep you company. You have a reading room all to yourself today, so James has made himself comfortable on the couch and Sirius has laid his head down in his lap, content to have his hair played with while James watches you and Remus study.

“And which carpals communicate with the radius?” Remus asks. 

“Um…”

“Think carefully,” Sirius says in his TV host voice. “This one’s for full points.” 

You blink. You feel suddenly odd. Off-kilter. “There’s two,” you say slowly. “Lunate and…um…” 

“Can we do hints?” James asks. 

You’d rather not, but you feel like you need it. “Sure.” 

“Alright.” Remus glances down at your card. “It starts with an s.” 

“I know it.” You squeeze your eyes shut. “I had this one yesterday. It’s like sca…sca something. Sorry, I feel like I can’t concentrate.” 

“Do you want me to tell you?” Remus asks gently. 

You sigh. “Yeah, okay.” 

“It’s lunate and scaphoid.” 

You groan, pushing your fingers into your forehead. “I knew that.” 

“It’s alright.” Remus sets the card in the middle stack. He’s watching you carefully. “Do you think it’s time for a break?” 

“Yeah.” You take a deep breath. “I feel weird, I think…” You pick up your water bottle, but it’s light, empty. “I’m going to go get some water.” 

Remus’ eyes are sympathetic. “Good idea, dove.” 

The feeling worsens when you stand, like the change in altitude is making you light-headed. You take two steps. The first wobbles, the second sinks. 

You don’t remember passing out. There’s no darkening of your vision or panicky realization, just one second your knee is bending unbidden and the next the trampled fibers of the library carpet are smushed against your face. 

“Fuck, sweetheart.” It takes you a second to recognize the feel of hands under your head and ribcage, but that’s James’ voice. The knees of Remus’ trousers are in front of your face. “What’d you do that for?” 

“I didn’t mean to,” you mumble. 

“Let’s get you on your back,” says Remus. 

He and James work together to rotate you gently, and then you have a better view of the room. Remus and James kneeling above you, Sirius standing behind them with a look of wide-eyed horror. It appears each of your boyfriends has jumped up in a fright. 

“Do you feel warm?” Remus brushes some hair away from your face while James picks up your wrist to get your pulse and Sirius launches into action, kneeling by your feet. 

“Not really…” You startle as your legs pick up off the floor. “Sirius, my skirt!”

“It’s just us here, doll,” Sirius reminds you. “I promise to protect your modesty if anyone comes in, whatever the cost.” 

You frown at what he could mean by that, but Remus thumbs over your cheek placatingly. “Is there anywhere around here that might have sports drinks?” 

“Um, there’s a vending machine downstairs.” 

“Perfect. I’ll be back shortly.” He gives your cheek a quick hold before leaving. 

James kisses your palm once he’s done with your pulse, and then his fingers find the collar of your shirt, popping open the first two buttons with practiced ease. 

Your hand flies up to prevent him going further. “Why does everyone keep trying to undress me?” 

James laughs, and Sirius replies smoothly, “Why, is this not a good time for you?” 

“Take it easy, lovie.” James takes your hand, holding it in his own. “We’re just making sure all the blood that wants to go to your brain can get there.” 

“Oh.” You knew that. Or you should’ve, if your brain was working properly.

“If it’s somewhat risque in practice, I certainly don’t mind as much with you as I do with the old blokes we sometimes get.” Sirius winks at you. 

You offer up a weak smile in return, and he pouts. 

“How’re you feeling, sweetness?” 

“I’m alright.” You take a breath. “Can I sit up now?”

“Let’s give it a bit.” James rubs your shoulder. “How do you really feel?” 

“Just…weird. Shaky. But not too bad.” 

“That’s good,” he says, though he looks like he doesn’t quite believe you. 

“I think I’ll be fine once I get something to drink.” 

“Mm, I think there’s probably a bit more to it than that,” Remus says as he comes back in. He crouches beside you, twisting the top off a bottle of orange juice. “That is a very well-stocked vending machine. Do you feel ready to sit up, dove?” 

“I have been,” you say. “They won’t let me.” 

“Such ingratitude,” Sirius teases as he sets your feet back down. “We were only waiting for your juice.” 

James helps you up with a hand on your back, and it takes a second of wordless wrestling with Remus to get him to let you bring the bottle to your own lips. 

“You could be dehydrated,” he says as you drink, “or you could just be exhausted, or both. And you can faint from too much stress too, you know.” 

“I know,” you grumble, wiping your mouth. 

Remus takes your face in his hand, forcing you to look at him. You find your indignance shrinking under his steady gaze. “You hurt yourself when you push yourself this hard, sweet girl.” 

“I know,” you say, softer now. “I thought I could handle it.” 

“You need to take more breaks.” 

You nod slightly. 

“And work on putting less pressure on yourself.” 

“Alright, Rem, lay off her.” Sirius rubs your knee. It breaks you from Remus’ trance, and your dark-haired boyfriend flashes you a smile when you look his way. “She’s got enough going through her head without having to remember all you want her to do. Let’s go home, yeah?” 

James insists on supporting you while you walk out of the library. Sirius and Remus debate what film you should put on once you get back to your flat. 

“Shouldn’t I get to choose?” you ask. 

“Well, look who’s feeling up to asking questions.” Sirius gives your cheek a condescending little pat. “Unfortunately, I don’t think you’re really ready to be picking out films, my love. Your decision making is probably still impacted from that fainting spell.” 

“Really.” You narrow your eyes at him. “I’ve never heard of that side effect.” 

“Well, you’re only a first year, doll. There’s lots you don’t know.”

[animeomegas]

Let's talk about Jamil and conditional heats.

Conditional heats are a version of the omega heat cycle that are a little more... sentient? Rather than heats happening like clockwork, conditional heats only happen when an omega's instincts believe that certain criteria have been met.

For a sexual heat, they decide there's a fine piece of alpha nearby that is perfect to mate and make babies with.

For a soft heat, they decide that there is a safe alpha who can protect the omega while they deal with some kind of stress, sickness, or burnout.

...

So, imagine Jamil, someone who has never had a real heat before, waking up a little warmer and stranger than normal. He's confused, he thinks he might be sick, which sucks because he really doesn't have time to be sick.

It's harder to pull himself out of bed than normal, but when he thinks about how he has a meeting planned with you, an alpha that he... enjoys the company of... he manages to get up.

But when he pulls back the covers, he's hit with his own scent, crazy strong and thick. He just stares for a moment, confused, and then a horrible, horrible thought runs through his head.

No.

He races to the nearest mirror. His flushed, sweaty face stares back at him in horror. The scent glands on his neck and thighs are swollen, his pupils are dilated, his skin is flushed all over... and he can't help but wish that you were here with him.

No.

"Don't you dare do this," he whispers to his reflection. "Don't you dare. I'm just... sick. I'm just sick."

He's been busy and stressed beyond normal the past few weeks, perfect conditions for getting sick... He ignores the voice inside his head which points out that those conditions are perfect for a soft heat as well.

He doesn't have time for this, and he's choosing denial, so he slaps on as many scent patches as he has available to try and reign it in, splashes cold water on his face and get ready like normal.

He manages to convince himself that he's doing well, until the second he opens the door to his room, and everything in him is screaming that it's not safe.

He's trained to pay attention to his instincts, to seek danger, but today his anxiety is through the roof. Every step feels like the last one he'll get to take and he doesn't know why.

He's on edge, snapping at everyone over everything. Even Kalim notices that something is very wrong and thinks Jamil is sick. Several people figure out he's in a soft heat, and try to gently steer him back to his room, but he bites the head off of anyone that even hints at it.

Eventually, word must have got back to you, because you find him at lunch. He was trying to hide in one of the more shadowy corners behind a building, just to take a moment to regain his composure, when he hears your voice.

"Jamil?"

No. No, anyone but them.

Underneath all the scent patches, he can feel his scent glands working overtime to try and desperately produce a scent that will bring you close to him.

No, he's sick! He's just sick!

"G-Go away," he manages to grit out, the words causing him physical pain. "Leave me alone."

Unhappy with his resistance, his legs buckle beneath him, sending him sprawling to the ground.

Yes, if he falls, if he's weak, his alpha will protect him, they'll stay by him, this is good.

No! No, it is not good!

"Jamil!" You rush to his side, supporting him with one arm around his waist while your other hand gently pushes his hair away from his face. He can feel you studying him, looking for what's wrong. He just hopes you don't find anything.

"Jamil? Did someone trigger your heat?" you asked delicately, voice quiet and soothing, like he's some sort of child that needs mollycoddling.

"No!" he denies. "I'm sick. I'm just sick." He doesn't know which one of you he's trying to convince at this point.

You don't believe him, he can tell. Honestly, he doesn't blame you; it's a rather pathetic attempt at a lie. But you don't call him out on it, either.

"Jamil, if you're sick, then you should be resting in your room." You scoop him up in your arms before he can protest. He let's out a little strangled noise of surprise though. "Let me take you back to your room, you won't gain anything from forcing yourself through the day like this."

"But Kalim-"

"But Kalim nothing. You're just as important as he is, and you need rest when you're sick, Jamil. If Kalim needs anything, I'll handle it, okay?"

Part of him croons at your words and the other part resents them. It's this ridiculous attitude of yours that has him all... ruined. It pisses him off; life was much simpler before you turned up.

There's also another part of him, a much louder part than he would like, that's angry at the thought of you helping Kalim. You're supposed to be helping him, looking at him, being with him, not Kalim!

He doesn't say anything out loud though. He's honestly worried he'll make an embarrassing noise if he opens his mouth to speak.

Besides... your arms feel nice. Maybe he should take a nap? His eye lids feel heavy... he's been overworked so much recently, he needs a break, and you're here to protect him...

No... he shouldn't... it wouldn't be a good idea...

You're shushing him now... the vibrations from your chest are soothing...

A good idea...

To...

"Sleep, Jamil. I've got you."

To...

His eyes slip closed and his body goes limp. He'll regret his succumbing to his instincts later, but for now, some good sleep is well needed.

...

Jamil is perfect for this set up imo, because he needs an outside force to make him admit he likes an alpha. It's not convenient for him, so he'll ignore it until he literally can't anymore lol.

I don't remember the point I was making when I started this post but... Jamil 🥰

[I'm still learning about the TWST characters, so hopefully this is okay! Thank you for reading!]

[cinnamongrl2006]

Hello! Can i request Hal jordan x reader but, she is batmans assistant. Essentially he gets jealous that batman has your attention all the time and has a small rivalry with batman whre they compete for the reader affection.

Feel free to ignore (♡◕ω◕♡)

a/n: I've not been online much lately because life has genuinely been crazy, but I miss you guys so much! And I'm sorry I'm not going through my inbox as quick as I'd like. I'll try to have part 2 out by next week! Also, can't believe there's almost 600 of you!! cw: fem reader part 1 | part 2 | part 3

Working for the Justice League was not an easy job, but it was a well paying gig that your years as an assistant for different government departments had gotten you, and you were not about to sacrifice that for a little peace of mind. Sure, Batman was demanding, but that was because he knew what you were capable of, because he saw your potential.

“You know, I wouldn’t push you if I didn’t believe in you,” Bruce would say, glancing back at you as you hurried to keep up. And you believed him, because he was so smart, so confident, he had to be right.

You found your job slightly humiliating, all that running around behind him, files clutched in your arms, computer screen glowing on your face as he paced and talked— walking helped him think— about some case or other. Most of the work you did was administrative, you were, essentially, an overqualified secretary.

You spent your days in the watchtower and most of your nights in the cave, the burnout seemed imminent, but it never quite got to that point. Batman was just testing your potential, he would never overwork you.

“Can you file this under urgent? And let Superman know.” he’d request, barely breaking stride.

“Sure, right away!” you’d reply, trying to keep your voice from breaking under pressure.

You could keep telling yourself that this was the job opportunity of a lifetime, that all the pressure Bruce put on you would only make you strive for more and reach perfection, but Hal wouldn't take it.

Everyone noticed it, really. Batman went through assistants like Bruce Wayne went through girlfriends: quickly and without a second thought. But you were holding on, you'd been around for longer than any other of his assistants.

You were so different from all of them, too—so sweet and doting, patient with him when Bruce was being an asshole, always going the extra mile to fix any issue he might have had. Hal could only wish to be so lucky.

God, Hal didn't know what he would do if he were on the receiving end of your actions—your attempts at jokes that never seemed to cheer up the Bat but always made Hal's heart race a little faster, and the careful way you checked in with Bruce after missions, never pushing too hard, always wide-eyed and genuinely interested.

He thought you looked just like a fawn, always shyly trailing behind Batman on shaky legs, as if you hadn't yet gotten used to the hustle and bustle of working with him, as if you didn't yet know the Hall of Justice and the Watchtower like the back of your hand. He couldn't help but smile at you every time you locked eyes, flashing his sharp canines—those sharp canines you daydreamed about sinking into your skin, hard enough to leave a mark, hard enough to feel the sting—just to see your cheeks go red as you looked back down at the files on your desk.

Hal found it so unfair how Bruce was just hoarding you, he never even glanced at you, had you working day and night, running, blood pumping, heels clicking.

If you were his, Hal would never have you running around in heels, typing for hours on end, or classifying files chronologically at the end of every month. Ideally, if you were his, Hal wouldn't let you work at all; you would never have to lift a finger around him, unless it was to boss him around, which you were uncharacteristically good at.

But for now, you were all over Batsy, and there wasn't much he could do apart from smile at you from across the room. So, he started to try harder, asking about your weekends, hobbies, and your coffee order, listening attentively—or trying to—because Bruce always needed you for something once the conversation started to get intimate.

"Jesus, you've been locked in here for four hours straight, does he know you're not a robot?" Hal would lean over your desk, palms flat against the table, forearms bulging right in your line of view. God, what you would do to bite them.

"It's all part of the job, nothing I can't handle." You brushed him away with a flick of your hand, your cheeks heating up under his worried gaze.

“Sure, but you shouldn't have to run yourself ragged.” Hal said, his voice low but earnest.

“I’m fine,” you insisted, trying to sound more confident than you felt. “I can manage this.”

Hal raised an eyebrow, unconvinced. “You know, I can’t remember the last time I saw you take a proper break. What’s the point of working so hard if you don’t take a second to breathe and see how far you got?”

“I just don’t want to let him down. There’s a lot riding on these reports.”

“Yeah, but you’re not a machine. Even machines need maintenance,” Hal replied, leaning back slightly. “How about this: take a quick break, and I’ll grab us both a coffee. My treat.”

Before you could reply, as always, Bruce's frame appeared from behind him, movements slow and deliberate.

"Jordan. You're not distracting my secretary, are you? I need those reports typed in before midnight."

And Hal took the hint, leaving with a playful wink tossed over his shoulder. Hal Jordan was not one to back down from a challenge; if it meant fighting Bruce off with nails and teeth, then so be it. You were too beautiful not to fight for.

────୨ৎ────

taglist: @laceyfaeryy, @cherrycolaheartss

[serotonins-stuff]

Burnout ~Senku Ishigami

Senku knows burnout better than anyone. So it's only natural that he steps up when he sees you in distress.

• ° • . • ° • . • °

"Love?" Senkus's voice rang out from the hallway. "It's been three hours. Are you okay?"

No response.

He softly placed down the hot chocolate he made for you on the floor before pressing the side of his face against the door. He heard the slightest sniffle and wasted no time in bursting through the door. His face was laced with worry, and his heartbeat only accelerated at the thought of something being wrong.

There you were, hunched over your desk with your face buried in your folded arms. Your shoulders shook with each sob and Senku was already by your side.

"Hey," he cooed while holding you close, his hand rubbing your back while the other softly unraveled your arms. "What's the matter?"

You looked up at him through your tear-stained eyes, sniffling while he pulled a nearby chair to sit beside you. His other hand never left your back, instead he stretched his body outward awkwardly to reach for the other chair. He couldn't let you go, not in a moment like this, not even for a single second.

He pulled you closer to him, causing you to have to face him head-on, with no cover for you to hide your face.

“Why's my girl crying?” he asked with an intense look of concern in his eyes, gently cupping your face with his hands to catch every tear that silently traced down your cheeks. It wasn't often you heard such softness in his voice contrasted with the urgency in his demeanor.

"I'm burnt out" you hiccupped, you're breath rate picking up when you pointed to the enormous amount of work on your desk "But this is due in two days so I have to get it done"

"It's just really frustrating because I've been trying so hard, yet I feel like I'm getting nowhere," you sniffled; you wanted to continue to tell him about every aspect of this assignment that made you so defeated. Instead the only thing that came out was a soft wail.

It hurt him to see you like this, and the scientist in him wanted to so badly help you and make all your problems go away.

But the boyfriend in him knew that he had to hear your frustrations a deal with them how you wanted them dealt with.

And from experience, he's learned that in moments like these, you really just wanted him to hear your frustrations. In this case, though, they were so overwhelming to the point where you couldn't even voice them.

"Let's take a break okay?" He said through a soft smile, his voice low and gentle "I'll run you a warm bubble bath and bring you some of the hot chocolate you like"

"But I really need to get this done." You took a deep breath, a weak smile so desperately wanting to tug at your lips. Just seeing him trying, made your heart so full.

"I know" he chuckled, kissing your forehead "And I'll help you do it"

"But-" you started to retort, but paused when he suddenly gave you a swift kiss on the lips.

"I'm ten billion percent sure you'll feel better when we're done"

Senku rarely wanted to participate in bubble baths and long binge-watching marathons, so hearing him say we ignited some excitement within you.

"Now, c'mon,," he said before helping you up and placing his hand on the side of your neck. His eyes were sincere and glossy, telling you just everything you needed to know.

"Seeing you cry breaks my heart"

•••

Hey it's been a minute :)

You guys asked for more Senku so here ya go!

[biteofcherry]

Helloooooo I have a question about got Steve, how would he handle/react to omega going through a bout of burnout at work?

Grain of Truth

Alpha Steve Rogers x omega female reader

warnings: none; it's pure comfort and fluff, and Steve being bossy;

As you type away the summary of your last patient's visit, your fingers smack into the keyboard with more force and less grace than usually. But it was either murdering the keyboard, or snapping in annoyance at your patient.

And you wouldn't do that.

You are professional. To the point of knowing that it's not really the patient's fault that irritation bubbles inside of you.

It's the burden of the past six months of working dutifully, dealing with a shitload of new bureaucracy politics, struggling with limitations set by the healthcare department.

The weeks of work that feels like swimming against the current.

But you're going to push through. You have to. Your patients are counting on you (and on your ability to stop yourself from strangling them).

Saving your report, you take a deep breath and silently pray there are still some danish pastries in the lounge room. Darcy brought them this morning, but since you had sessions back to back you weren't sure if the flock of clinic employees haven't devoured them all already.

If there's none left, it's possible you will snap and go on a murder spree. Or break down in tears.

Before you make it to the door, however, they open and a familiar, huge silhouette fills the frame.

"Steve?" You look at him, surprised.

"Omega." There's the usual softness to his tone, but the way his gaze scans your form is leveling up the disapproval.

"You look tired." He frowns, stepping inside and closing the door behind you.

"Way to compliment your mate." You glare at him.

Perhaps it would convey your annoyance, if the moment wasn't ruined by your stomach growling loudly. Which in turn makes Steve's frown deepen and his disapproving glower harden.

"Please, tell me you didn't skip lunch." He asks, but you know the please is just a decorative chime, because your Alpha is dropping into his dominating, commanding state.

You are tempted to say you didn't skip lunch, which would be a lie and both of you know it.

"I was about to eat," you say instead. "There are some pastries in-"

"That's it. I'm taking you home." Steve announces.

"What? No! I have reports to finish and materials to prepare for tomorrow, and-"

"And you've been overworking yourself for the past weeks. You come back home half dead, you're moody, less focused, you skip meals. You cursed and almost cried when you picked up a phone call from Maria a few days ago, because you were scared she wanted you to take an additional shift."

You're about to counter his points, because even if those bits are somewhat true, it doesn't mean he can just barge in and decide you're going home.

But there's another sentence that falls from his lips, another change he notices. When he says it, he sounds really worried and angry - not at you, but at your state. At the state your work has put you in.

"You haven't watered your plants in almost two weeks."

To someone outside, it would sound ridiculous and like the least important change. But Steve knows you so well. He knows your patterns and recognizes which changes are the most alarming ones.

It's true. Your plants still bring you joy, you love having them and looking at them, but you haven't been able to make yourself move your ass and water them.

Sometimes it happened, that you skipped a day or two from your usual watering routine. Missing over a week was a drastic change. But you just couldn't make yourself do anything. You just wanted to drop into bed, sleep dead, because you had to get up in the morning and return to work.

That damn, fucking work.

"I can't just-" you let out a sigh and try to reason with him.

Even if you're feeling like crying, because your Alpha has noticed your strain and is ready to battle whatever is draining you, you can't just pack up and leave.

"But I can." Steve nearly growls. Not in that fun, hot way.

He steps closer, grabs your handbag from the shelf and hooks it over his shoulder. Then, before you even decipher his intention, he swiftly picks you up.

Instinctively, your arms wrap around his neck.

"Steve!" You squeak. "Don't be ridiculous! Put me down and let me work."

"No." His tone is unyielding.

"Steve!"

"Maria prides herself on being the most efficient clinic manager, she can put her skills to use and deal with you taking a vacation." Your Alpha says as he basically kicks the door open and carries you out, without an ounce of shame, or hesitation.

"You will take leave, Omega." Steve growls and this time there's that pure Alpha timbre to it that sends a shiver down your spine. If you weren't so exhausted, you'd probably be instantly aroused.

"If I have to tie you up to the bed to have you take a break and relax, I will."

"You can't solve everything by being so damn bossy," you grumble, but don't put any fight against his hold.

"Watch me." Steve challenges, being his typical smug Alpha asshole.

He yanks you up a bit and tilts his hold so that your head rests on his shoulder, closer to the crook of his neck where his scent is so prominent and soothing.

You nuzzle into that spot on instinct, taking a deep whiff and feeling your muscles relax as you're cocooned in your Alpha's protectiveness.

[pretzel-box]

Hello everyone.

This will be a rather long post about some things I wanna adress, including the fact that I plan to stop writing for Pressure, my OCS and other peoples Ocs in the near future.

Down under the cut is a list with my personal view, issues and some other things that lead to this decision. Maybe I miss a lot or don't go too deep into detail but the main points are covered.

But before I would like to add that this is MY opinion and MY choice. I let you think of it what you want but I also request that you respect my actions.

The first point is probably already clear from the start. Maybe some noticed, maybe not but I fell out of love with the fandom and the game itself. It became boring to play, the characters lost their charm and I can't come up with any creative scenarios anymore and the ones that already exists have lost their meaning. This may sound like the typical burnout thing and maybe it is but I'm more than certain that I wanna step away from the game and the fandom to focus on other things that bring me more joy. Maybe I start a multifandom writing blog or I just learn another hobby.

The second thing that is close connected to the first point is the fandom of the game, including the community on tumblr. A huge part are super sweet people with a very creative side. I would go as far and say that I brought some of those together with my projects and writing and it really makes me happy to see everyone interact so friendly on my blog.

But something that I haven't adressed is the fact that there are also plenty of hardcore fans, haters and weird people in my askbox or general in the fandom. It is to be expected when someone gains a massive amount of followers. But I do not accept the fact that people judge me based on what I write, who I write for, when I write and if I write at all. I delete those asks. Some telling me that my community project is awful, unserious and pulls other ocs into dirt. Other people are claiming that I don't write Sebastians Character right and oh wow seriously? I am not Sebastians creator, I do not have that ultimate deep lore and mindset to write a person 1:1. I get hate for my own stories and of course the fans could now come to my protetion and say „But Chea don't listen to the haters, you are amazing“ but it doesn't fix the thing in a slightest.

Also regards the people that praise me, some of them ( I won't name anyone) are counting to those weird people that force me. There were 2 or 3 people that acted all sweet in public only to try and take control of some story plots etc.

Also, I started writing when Pressure was first raising to be popular. There weren't many pressure writers out there. I am usually not someone that posts their work online, I don't comment on stuff and I rarely like something. But I really wanted to see more pressure fanfictions. Now we reached the point where there are more than plenty amazing writers and I can quit. There is no need for me to continue something that only makes me hate myself more because everytime I open my notes to write a story for pressure it feels like a mental torture. I leave the writing to the other blogs.

The status for now:

AASB gets discontinued.

Reverse AU gets discontinued.

Streamer AU will recieve 6 more chapters to end the story on a good term.

House of Entities will get continued for a small period of time, probably till I am done with the Streamer AU. There is no plan for the chapter count yet.

All requests in the inbox will get deleted and the inbox itself will be closed after Streamer AU finished.

Any other unnamed project will get discontinued as well.

All stories, one shots, series, drabbles and other works of mine are free to use. Other authors can pick them up, re-write them or just make an own story out of those. I drop all rights for the ideas and I won't demand any credits either. Maybe someone else would like to continue House of Entities as well.

My final word, which may sound repeating: I do not change my opinion, there won't be any motivation talks or sugar coated words that will change my stand in those things. I know some of you will try and comfort me but this is really not needed. I wish for you all to accept the outcome of this situation and move on more or less.

I apologize dearly because this is very sudden and I hope you all will understand.

-Chea

[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

got anything for Kisaki with a partner who's got really bad burn out? I'm always so tired and I'd love to hear how he'd help

Here's how I think he would help with burnout, hope you're feeling better soon too!

Kisaki's very observant so he would pick up on you being burnt out or getting close to that point before you even really realise it yourself.

He would have no problem with telling someone to back off if it was a specific person causing the burnout. (or telling Hanma to send them a message).

Does his best to encourage you to take time off and take a break. He'll even do something drastic as a way of being supportive, take time off himself (he doesn't do this often).

May just book you both a flight somewhere and go on a sudden holiday to help you out.

Would also consider telling you to quit or buying the company or place you work at so he could change it. Would also ask you first though (he doesn't see this as being a big deal but knows you might).

Tells you that you can discuss anything with him, including your feelings. He just wants to support you and help you feel better. He actually may not be the best at this if the relationship is near the start but he still tries and is learning.

Also learns to ask you what kind of support you want or what you think you need, so he can adjust to that. He's pretty much willing to do whatever you suggest.

Probably ends up doing something really random to try and help you at some point because he mentions it to Hanma and he tells him to take you to a zoo or something and Kisaki actually does it.

He's just very sweet during this whole time, well he'll still snap at others and get annoyed by them but is very sweet and caring to you. He's patient in trying to help you too.

[morteraphan]

Hello, Forgive me for this sudden question, I hope it is appropriate. I think you might have some experience.

Straight to the point, I would like to know how you (how to) grow a presence online as an artist. The algorithm is really bad in this era, and it's hard to get someone to see your work if you are a nobody.

I have been on social media for 5 years and tried all the methods I could. everything. I could. At one point got so desperate for attention started clout chasing for an audience, which ended up regretting and deleting an account with 9k random people. It is impossible to grow an art account by just posting. And I personally don't think engaging with others is a good way now, the art community used to be nice, but now people are all just so... different.

When I am drawing alone, I enjoy the process, and I want to show my art to others. I don't have people to share in real life, so social media is the only option. Yet ironically because of the algorithm mostly (and my very unlucky fortune), I don't have anyone to see my art. Literally no one. ( maybe only that one/two guys, which I'm grateful) I am just so tired of trying and failing again.

Sometimes when I see artists get all the attention and support, I can't help but feel jealous. Especially those who live on their ocs and can get people to engage with their oc universe. I envy them because I want to share mine as well. I don't crave much and don't need a thousand people, I just want my work to be seen and make myself feel worthy. It's true they say 'Don't care about popularity do art for yourself' but it's hard.

It has been a vicious cycle, and it has seriously affected my mental health. I used to be a super active artist, yet now I realise I don't like drawing that much anymore. I don't enjoy the only hobby I like, drawing. Because I know no matter how much effort I put into the artwork, no one is going to see it. Even though I like to draw, I can't bring up /finish larger works like I used to. When I think about drawing, it feels like a chore without a reward (external validation).

What I think upset me the most, is when someone managed to see my work on social media, they only spam likes and not follow... ? Because I only have like 10 followers. I don't know how to react anymore.

I have a dream to become a comic artist. I am afraid no one will see my work because I am not a well-known artist. I am so disappointed about everything. I just wish there was someone who could truly appreciate my efforts, and support my work so I may feel I have a purpose to keep on creating.

I am so sorry this turned out to be a long vent, I never told anyone before, I hope someone can hear my inner thoughts as an artist struggling to survive. 🙏

Uh, anon, I'm so sorry to read this. I understand what you're saying and I agree that the internet is a very cruel place for artists right now. Too much competition, algorithms that make it impossible to get seen, AI crap, etc.

Unfortunately, I'm not the kind of person who can tell you how to be successful. I have always been very bad at it myself. I have been posting for over 15 years - and only now have I started to interest more people in my characters (and still, I regularly see artists who are much more successful than me, and who are 10-15 years younger than me). Probably, my first success was the designs of anthro characters, but even when I returned to drawing people, I lost a lot - followers, patrons, mutuals. Of course, I don't complain and am very grateful for what I have. And I'm grateful to those people who support my work. It's just that I'm really not the kind of person who makes successful decisions in my own promotion.

From what I can see, people like fanart, fandoms, some crossovers, DnD. I don't suggest drawing what you don't like - because this will only lead to burnout. But maybe if you find some interesting niche for yourself, you will be able to find people with similar interests and start building your social circle. It's sad that there are no art forums left now, because it was a cool thing. Sometimes I even think about starting my own little forum lol. But still, there are places like Bluesky where artists are now building a new community and helping each other in promotion.

If you want to draw comics - start right now! Draw comics, use hashtags, use all available platforms. Don't try to think of something global, start with something simple and something that will bring you joy. People like comics because they often help to reveal the character better than illustrations. For example, drawing silly little strips really helped me, I started them as a rough sketch after a migraine, and now it is one of the pillars of my art.

Anyway, sorry if this didn't help you at all and my message was useless. I myself am a person with burnout and a very gloomy outlook on the future, and I'm learning to love drawing again like before. I wish you success in your art and don't lose heart - sometimes the path can be very difficult and long, but if you do something for the soul, in the end it will bring results. ❤️

[asexualcorvidae]

I finished Wanderstop yesterday. I really liked it. A solid game.

The way the story interwove with the mechanics was very overt, but also very good. There's obvious friction in the mechanics, which is intentional; when you do the same task over and over again, you notice the small inefficiencies, like how long something takes or that your garbage can is right in front of your fridge so it turns on when you open the fridge (true story). But that's all part of it! Was it the most innovative game I've ever played? No. Did I get tired of some of those inefficiencies by the end? Yeah. But that's pretty typical!

The story is the real standout here. A lot of posts I see say that Wanderstop is about burnout, which is like saying Celeste is about overcoming difficulty. It's not... wrong. But it's not telling the full picture.

[Full game spoilers ahead!]

Wanderstop is about hating yourself. It's about hating something you have done or someone you have been so much that you wish you were a different person. This is much more obvious by the end of the game, and I suspect most of those reviews saying the game is about burnout had not reached this point. Still, that is what this game is about. Alta doesn't burn out solely because she worked too hard. She is deeply lethargic because she carries around the burden of being a failure and a monster.

There's so much that Wanderstop gets right about this experience that it makes me glad. Way back in the day, I used to talk about how much I loved empathetic portrayals of downright unpleasant and especially violently mentally ill people. Alta is never redeemed for her violence. The game does not ask you to overlook what she did or move past it. But the narrative gives space for Alta to comprehend her own actions, that she (not some spirit possessing her) did try to kill someone who was just trying to help, and says, "You still carry in you the capacity for good. Whether you do good is up to you." Not to sound like a therapy enjoyer, but there's space for both of these things - just like there's space for the synthesis of both Altas.

On that note - I loved the concept of the forest creating "space" between the two fragments of Alta (and doing the same later with Monster), because that is exactly what it was like for me. I used to fight with myself all the time, and that's what those conversations with myself were like - like two different people, with two completely different mindsets and perspectives, existing just a few centimeters apart from one another. It also represents the way that people overcome (violent) impulses - by creating just a small space to pause and think. That space starts so incredibly small, but just a tiny wedge allows you to slowly wedge in more time until you can really take a good 30 seconds to think before you chunk your phone across the room. (True story.) (I'm very lucky that I never broke a phone doing that.) (This happened many times.)

I wonder what a story like this would have meant to me shortly after making peace with myself - or even moreso, before then. I don't know if I would have liked this game as much! I might have even liked it more, but also sobbed like a baby during it. It's definitely a very emotional story, even by the end, and I quite liked it. There's a lot you can unpack from that game. I definitely recommend it.

[strawberrykaon]

I think autistic primarchs would present very differently than in a baseline human. Its so much easier to cover up or explain away.

Like if Mortarion goes semi- verbal, he still sounds normal. But very stilted for a primarch. Its different from when I can only maybe say three words at a time. Usually I can only go "I don't know" or "no", or "go away". For him it's still full length sentences, like "I think I just need to be alone now". That can easily be explained to be exhaustion. But in reality he can't vocalize anything more complex right now.

Guilliman has be scripting since a child but no one notices. He just has over 100 scripts memorized for any occasion. Any question or change in the conversation. He already has a script lined up. He's capable of memorizing it. Conversations happen so naturally, you can't even tell the difference.

Even the way they stim can be so different to a baseline. Probably in ways a baseline can't comprehend. Traits like increased pattern recognition are standard in a primarch. All primarchs are far more "higher functioning" than any baseline.

Being behind their brothers developmentally by a few weeks is nothing compared to a baseline. What's walking at two months when most humans are closer to a year old when they start. Sure the other primarchs were walking much sooner. Some right out of the pod. But they often reached adulthood far sooner than any human. What constitutes a development delay to a primarch. If an apothecary can't tell what's a high blood pressure level in Guilliman. How can you tell?

Exhaustion that so many autistic face is so off from a baseline. They need less sleep. They can go through periods without rest for far longer. I think in cases like Mortarion, he can just push through an autistic burnout. Sure he's a bit more irritable, among other things. But hey, the point of a shutdown won't hit him till a few decades later. So therefore he must have high energy levels then even his brothers. Despite the toll on his mental health. Plus their recovery times are far shorter. Guilliman needs just a few days to feel normal after a year long campaign after all. Doesn't matter how he was acting prior. Any strange behavior can be hand waved away.

Mental conditioning can be used to suppress sensory overload. No point in having your super solider curl up screaming because he has super hearing. And you threw him into an active warzone. Lets make sure you can't process that information in way that would harm you. (Plus I think as a rule primarchs have a tendency to be more sensory seeking than sensory avoidant.)

Hell even their positions in the imperial society could make it easier to mask. If Perturabo wants something done in a certain way, you are going to do it that way. You're just some 25 year old iron warrior or serf that needs to follow command. Plus you don't know best compared to a primarch.

Of course they mask in typical ways. Mortarion hasn't rocked when upset since he was young. Because Nacrae told him that he should avoid such weakling behavior. Or still show more obvious traits like Dorn's flatter speaking style. (IDK how true this is but everyone says this and I'm not too familiar with Dorn to say otherwise.)

Also I like to imagine that the Emperor intentionally placed Autism into some of his designer babies. Thinking he could "avoid all the negatives but only gain those traits that would benefit them greatly." Only for his patience to slowly be drained. Like Perturabo having a meltdown while Dorn is trying to get the two of them to work together. But he's lost the ability to mask what little he does. And is just going, "We are to conclude this activity in an hour. I have to calibrate the ships sensors in an hour and half. You have already wasted 10 minutes. We must refocus so we can conclude in an hour..."

The problem start when understanding what's going on under the surface. Or when you start comparing them to their brothers. But hey you're below understanding what a primarch is thinking. And all the primarchs are little off. They're demigods. What makes these one's so different. Doesn't help they themselves won't consider it themselves. Or even be insulted by the implication. I'm not an invalid. Don't be ridiculous.

(I used Perturabo, Dorn, and Guilliman here because they're the common ones head cannoned as autistic. I went with Mortarion as well because I decided to just go with it. I know him the best. Plus this is all just headcannon. Just to be clear. Reasoning being his kids tend to present with a flat personality anyways. Also heard Mortarion was always behind his brothers, so developmental delays?? Idk yet where they got that in lore yet. Trying to get through all the books is a lot. Plus his other strange behaviors. But it could just be poor socialization as a child mixed with mental illness. Could also just be all three too. But more than these four could be autistic is my point. Sorry if this post was rambling or unclear. Or if anyone has done this before. I just wanted to get my thoughts out on the subject.)

[ariaste]

What are your tips for wrapping a book up? I can do short stories just fine, but if I try writing long pieces, I end up fizzling out around the final climax and abandoning the project. I think it's just a lot of pressure and build up and after writing everything else, getting the big, important scene and aftermath out seems incredibly difficult.

I think you've already answered your own question -- "It's just a lot of pressure." Yep, that would be my first possible diagnosis! :) So the answer then would obviously be that you need to find ways to relieve the pressure you're putting on yourself. You know yourself better than I do, beloved Anon, so you will know the best way to do this. After all, you knew yourself well enough to make a guess about what was happening internally, so I have full confidence that you can figure out a patch for it as well. It just might take some experimenting, and that is okay! That is a process of learning things about yourself.

Here are some experiments you could play with. Note that some of them directly address your problem and some of them address the situation adjacent to your problem, because we all know that brains love to tell us that something is wrong six inches to the left of what the actual problem is LOL. Remember that all experiments, even failed ones, are good experiments, because they give you DATA. So don't be disheartened if something doesn't work. It means you've ruled something out, and that's USEFUL.

Experiments:

you could try writing out of order rather than from beginning to end -- get to a place where you're excited and hype about what the climax is, jump ahead and write that, and then go back and fill in everything up to that point.

You could try switching to a different writing format (like, if you usually type out your stories, try writing the climax by hand -- I do this when I am having trouble connecting to a story emotionally, because I feel like it... sort of brings me physically closer to the story? So I can cozy up with it and feel more intimate with it.)

You could try writing in a different location, at a different time of day, etc

Make sure your environment is comfortable. Physical distractions like an itchy tag on your shirt, cold toes, or the upstairs neighbors vacuuming all contribute to suboptimal brain performance. Oh, and make sure you're getting good sleep.

Eat something heavy in protein and carbs about half an hour before you make an attempt at the climax so your brain has lots of energy. This is why writers are notorious for drinking tea/coffee -- caffeine is a drug! It is a stimulant! It makes your brain GO that little bit faster! But you need to eat properly in order to THINK properly, otherwise you're running on fumes and risking burnout.

HOWEVER, all that said... I have a second possible diagnosis. Your use of the phrase "fizzling out" inclines me to a small suspicion. Have you released too much tension in the story before the final climax? I often experience a "fizzling out" sensation when I make that mistake, and dialing up the tension fixes my momentum for the story.

Really, sometimes the emotions that you are feeling about a story aren't.... EMOTIONS per se, they're signals from your gut instincts that there is something going wrong that you need to go back and tweak. But our brains are stupid, and so our subconscious going "Oop, tension's off" reaches the conscious mind and is interpreted as "This is boring :(" or "I'm a terrible writer" or "[sudden disinterest in the book]" or any other kind of fizzling-out. That's not real!! Or, it is real, but it's something else besides what the top of your brain is thinking that it is! It's like when your car starts making a weird noise--it's got nothing to do with YOU, it's just a signal that something has worn out or come loose in the engine. Go back like 25-40 pages or so and reread what you've got with laser sharp eyes for where the tension starts to flag. If you find that, I would wager real money that fixing it will solve your problem with facing the climax.

Oh, and also: The opposite of anxiety is curiosity. Be curious about the problem, and be kind to yourself in the process of finding it. You haven't done anything wrong, you are not a bad writer. It is a GOOD THING to be noticing this pattern! Because now you can go digging and figure out what it MEANS. Where is that annoying beeping coming from? Which smoke detector has a low battery? Is it tension? Is it character? Is it because you've subconsciously spotted a plot hole like, "Wait a second, why wouldn't the villain just attack the city with their winged elephants?" And similar problems.

Hope that helps :D

[shradsmanifestt]

hi, im sorry for bothering u right now. ive been asking around for advice everywhere because i really need all the help i could use right now. my anxiety is flaring up like crazy because my results come out tomorrow and im so scared because if i mess this up then my future is ruined. my mental health has been horrible and that has severely affected my grades but in most asian countries they dgaf about that and basically think it's nonexistant for minors so ofc i'm still undiagnosed, and if i were to apply to a uni i wouldnt get any good chances anywhere. if i could just get 3 Bs in my AS levels it would be okay or else i'd have to retake it and it's super costly here.. i don't wanna put my family through that because they'll talk me down, degrade me, destroy my self esteem which i've managed to build back a little. they were like this since when i was the topper and thats what made me burnout. undiagnosed adhd, trauma, depression also contributed to it

im applying the law, but instead of the feeling of success that everyone else gets i feel panicked. the 'feeling' people usually get when they're in the wish fulfilled state, the feeling of accepting it and it being real—im not getting that. i dont see a clear picture when i visualize. every time i try to, i end up breaking down and feeling like a failure... but I'm still trying to go on because why is it that the people who hurt me and practically ruined my life get to live successfully, while i suffer? thats not fair... i promised myself that if i could just get 3 Bs, ill turn my life around and work really hard... but is it over for me? i want to win, im trying to, but im scared

im trying my best to visualize myself getting 3 Bs, reenacting my friends faces when i get the results, praying to God and thanking Him for blessing me and continuing to bless me, but there is this fear still lingering at the back of my mind... i feel like I'm not doing it right. i have like one day left and I'm so nervous. im going over posts, tweets, and every time I feel a little better, it all comes crashing down because of doubts. theres only one thing one my mind right now: 'how am I gonna turn it around in one day?' i know that the 3D does not matter and that everything is done in imagination, but here i feel like its not done in imagination either

right now nothings clicking in my head, whatever i read is getting scrambled in my mind, i feel so lost and empty. could u please tell me what to do in this specific situation? u can be as harsh as you want if that's what's needed to get the point across. im really sorry for the bother and id be really grateful if u could please help out, ive never been this desperate before... my life cant be over before it even started

Hey love,

I get you, I really do but trust me when I say this.

THIS SHIT IS REAL AF. Manifestation is real af. It's as real as the fact that you are a human being. All you have to do is trust yourself that it is already done. If good results is what you want then that is exactly what you'll get. You need to choose to stop having doubts because it is already done. That is the simplest answer I can give you. Persist on what you want.

I am glad to tell you this but I just got test results for a major exam held in my uni today and I got into the 95th percentile just by saying to myself that my super power is aptitude tests and that I already scored great. In my friends group only 3 of us were eligible and I have 70+ more marks then them as well. If I can do it, you can do it. You need to stop doubting yourself. Atleast stop doubting manifestation. Cause at this point you're only gonna manifest your doubts.

I'll give you a scenario - If you're worried about getting bad grades, Trust me when I say this you're gonna manifest exactly that coz you will manifest exactly what you assume. You can choose to stop that right here, RN. Choose to accept that you got great marks. I mean don't even like aim for B's go for A's. I don't care even if you left the paper blank coz if you assume you're the topper, that is exactly what's gonna happen.

If you do get bad marks and I'm gonna be harsh here - You're the only reason why! You're gonna manifest exactly what you assume to be true even if it's good or bad. Your sc mind don't differentiate btw what's good for you or what's bad for you. It only knows what you feed it.

You got this, TRUST ME

Love, Shrads.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - June 17

wrong answers anon (new), tech bro anon, glass child anon (new), interesting friend anon (new), frog stuffie guy anon

wrong answers anon

Cas is it being worse than somebody who’s been rude to you all school year (from sep-June) to tell them the wrong answers when they ask you?

There’s a boy in my class who’s really rude and he’s just really horrible in general and he’s always liked taking the mick out of me and my friend and recently he’s been asking me for answers during lessons and twice now I’ve told him the wrong answer and I did it today and I told my mum and she said I was just being worse than him and now I feel like shit.

Is that really being worse?

hahahahahaha

I mean is it being nice? no. But he doesn't deserve niceness at this point.

I wouldn't feel too bad about it. He's the one cheating. What's he going to do, tell the teacher you told him the wrong answer?

I think the thing is, yeah, ideally you're supposed to 'rise above' and always be kind and be the better person and all that shit. But what you're doing isn't cruel, it's just a bit petty, and it sounds like he's a shit person who could use being taken down a peg. I wouldn't lose sleep over it. The fact that you're worried about it shows that you're a good person. As long as you're not like...giving him wrong answers for a test that decides his entire future or something, he's going to be just fine.

<3

___

tech bro anon

Agh it’s tech bro anon I just realized why i still want character ai after all this time—

I am VERY lonely and romantically starved and I know for a fact I’m not ready for a relationship yet (I have self esteem issues, very negative beliefs about myself and friendship and romance as a whole that I should probably keep working through, etc.) and character ai is how I pretended to be a cooler older person while thinking I was doing no harm (I was, in fact, doing much harm to myself, fandom, and the environment), and now I’m forced to live with my “boring” reality, you know? Like, I can’t sedate my brain anymore with fantasies of being older and cooler and dating someone. I have to pick the long-form dopamine with things that stimulate me, things that are good for me, etc., instead of logging out of existence for hours on end with character AI. I haven’t used it in a while so it’s kind of weird that I JUST had this revelation, or really put it into words but, yeah.

With this newfound information, I am going to set up an experiment for myself with the dopamine thing.

I am going to actually stick to my screen time limits I set for myself, and I’m going to limit fanfiction too for the next week. I have literally so many hobbies that I want to do and I feel like searching for a character ai replacement has been the same level of damaging to myself as actually using it. Hopefully my brain will be a lot less fried, or something after the experiment, I dunno. I want to push myself though. I’ll tell you all about it in around a week or so! Wish me luck!

Hi!

That makes sense! I used to struggle a lot with similar things and I'd end up spending hours just like...daydreaming. (Pretty sure I had issues with maladaptive daydreaming but was never diagnosed). I'm glad to hear you're going to spend some time on your hobbies! Good luck, and keep me updated!

___

glass child anon

Tw i guess

Cas i really dont know how to word this other than im struggling. For some background information i am a double glass child and had to mature and grow up very quickly. My parents are great and genuinely try and my siblings arent at fault either since they are the most well intentioned and kindhearted older brother and sister you could ever wish for. But all of this has caused me to deal with physical stress and burnouts ever since i was 8. Last year i had to go down to half days at school for the second time because of exhaustion. Ironically enough things are actually better than ever currently, i started going back to school full time in august and have been to school almost everyday for a month now. My siblings are more independent now than when we were younger and my parents are able to actually go out with their friends for a night without a breakdown from my sister or a babysitter. Yet i feel like im falling apart at the seams, i have extreme highs and lows that can change within the hour and im having trouble with pretending that im fine, or that it isnt that bad as it actually is. I've always coped with humor and was the outgoing, silly but understanding child to distract my parents from the stress of having two heavily diagnosed kids even if just for a moment. But now that theres actually room and time for me its getting worse. My parents know this to some degree and im sure theyre more aware than they let on but i just feel like i cant burden them with anymore problems, i've been to a couple of "therapy" progams for kids over the years but i never really told the whole truth there.(redacted) sorry for venting all of this but i just need to know im not crazy.

Hi <3 You're always welcome to vent here.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that maybe part of the reason you don't want to get help is because you feel like, with your two siblings, your problems aren't as important/valid?

I need to tell you that that's SO far from the truth. Your struggles are so important and valid and you deserve attention and help just as much as anyone else in your family.

It's okay if you're not ready to ask for help yet, but you need to know that you DESERVE help, and your feelings are valid <3

Sending love!

___

interesting friend anon

Hi Cas I have a friend who’s quite interesting.

He can’t seem to let anyone have a worse life than him. One example is that he is on testosterone and whenever I complain about how hard puberty was on me, he respond with “well try having to go through TWO puberty’s” (I am also a trans guy as well)

Every time I mention I have anxiety he talks about how his therapist also told him that he had anxiety

I told him about my CAR CRASH and the diagnosed PTSD I have from it, and he told me that it “wasn’t that bad” because the car that hit my car was going 30mph slower then the car that his him (the car that hit me was going at like 35mph. Like what.)

I complain about being trans? Somehow his trans experience was worse (Both his parents are extremely accepting and have always been extremely accepting, meanwhile, my mom is transphobic and does not accept me). My mother is a Chinese immigrant, and whenever I talk about the ICE raids and that it’s scary to have a parent as an immigrant in these times, he either just gets distant or tells me that they’re not deporting asian people so I shouldn’t worry.

I just really don’t get it. He is a middle class white guy and is extremely privileged, but all he wants to go is see his life as worse then everybody else’s. He wants us to be there for his highs and lows but will only stay for our highs and it pisses me off.

Ugh that's so frustrating. I definitely know people like that as well, and you're right, it's so annoying. I think it comes from like...feeling like your feelings are invalid if other people go through shit, but that doesn't make it okay to act like that.

I'm guessing you've tried to bring it up? Because honestly I'd just be like, "Yeah, that's hard, but I want to talk about my feelings right now." and if he gets mad, then that's a sign that maybe he's not the person to have a deep friendship with.

Sending love!

___

frog stuffie guy anon

I'm worried that one day I'm going to be an alcoholic.

Already I'm beginning to fall on drinking when life gets too hard for me. And alchoholism runs in my family. I'm scared and I dont want to be drinking. I was doing well for a while and then I went out for a night with my friends (redacted) and it's been bad since then

- frog stuffie guy anon

Hi <3

I think if you're nervous it's becoming a problem then that could already be a warning sign. Do you black out when you drink? Do things you regret? Drink a lot when alone/when you're feeling negative feelings? Those are all really common warning signs as well. I'm not saying you definitely have a problem or anything, those are just things to watch out for.

Do you have anyone in your life who's sober? If you do, it might be a good idea to talk to them about how they realized they had a problem as well.

I think the good news is, you're already aware that drinking can easily become a problem. Some people aren't educated on that.

I'm not sure if it's necessary or if it's something in your area or how you feel about it, but I do know a lot about 12-step programs, so if you ever want to know more about that, feel free to inbox/DM me!

[azulcrescent]

Hi Azul! :) I started following your silly scribbles about a year ago, and seeing Cheryl model how she came out to her friends and family in the comic helped me articulate my gender experience better with my wife and even come out to my friends and family. Thanks for sharing your art! I also wanted to say that I'm sorry that you're experiencing poor sleep and burnout lately. :( Those can make you feel awful. I've had a chronic illness for the past six years -- and I'm fully aware that's something separate, nor do I want to equate it with your experiences -- but, at risk of giving any unsolicited advice, I do wish someone had said something to me about this when I first felt those as well. Because I was pushing myself to work for 2 hours a day as a special education paraprofessional in a wheelchair due to fatigue and systemic dysfunctions throughout my body -- so I had to quit my job since I was making my health even worse. When I stopped working, I was fully bed bound for a time but even still kept pushing myself to attempt grad school online despite only being able to sit up for 5-10% of the day. My point is that, even when our bodies are burnt out, we still push ourselves because that's generally just our human nature to do. And I wish that during that time someone had gently said it's okay to slow everything down and listen to what my body was telling me it needed.

With slowing down, I also get that finances are a thing, and I wouldn't have been able to recover from severe to moderate ME/CFS without my wife working her butt off for us to cover medical expenses by switching jobs and upskilling. (She jokes that she has no more butt anymore because of those years :'(... )

So, although this is stepping into unsolicited advice, but as someone who was burnt out and constantly eepy for years, I feel like it would be remiss of me to not try to say something and just give a bullet point list of free things that helped my nervous system not be so overstimulated and tired but wired that I couldn't sleep and even when I did it was unrefreshing and yucky to wake up the next day:

•Search for "ally boothroyd yoga nidra" on YouTube and pick a 10 minute video •Do belly breathing to expand the diaphragm (one of the few ways we can give input to our parasympathetic nervous systems -- the rest, digest, and heal system) •When breathing, breathe in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4, repeat to tell your body it can be calm •Spinal flossing in bed: start from your lowest vertebrae you can, try to isolate it with your muscles, and shift it up down left and right, then go up to the next one •Listen to how your body responds to foods: maybe try cutting out gluten and refined sugars for a week to see if it helps in any way; a lot of our immune system is in the gut, and being in a stressed state can cause our immune systems to mistake food molecules for pathogens which then activates the immune system and turns off the parasympathetic nervous system •Drop your jaw fully open like you're going to yawn, then stretch your tongue upward outside your mouth as far as it can go and stretch it around. This is a stretch for the muscles near your vagus nerve near your ear/neck behind the jaw to help them relax •Plan a bedtime routine for the thirty minutes before you go to bed and be consistent •Brain retraining: When you feel stressed or anxious about sleep or being burnt out, compassionately tell yourself "Stop, stop, stop." Thank that part of you for bringing up its concern, then remind that part of yourself that it doesn't need to worry anymore because you are working on recovering and healing. And if the insomnia or fatigue do happen, you have plans for what to do and will be okay. •Remember the conclusion from the American TV show Mythbusters: https://www.tumblr.com/gretchensinister/678474387179077632/one-of-the-most-life-changing-things-i-ever You're still getting rest even if you just close your eyes. You've talked about having ADHD, and while I don't have it, I get that it messes up brain chemicals and can contribute to both insomnia and burn out. There might be a reddit discussion that speaks to you better about medications or deficiencies. I hope you get to rest. Cheering for you. It's always fun to see your art. Thanks for what you do! :) Sleepy cat tax:

Glad to hear you like my comics! And thank you for the very informative and helpful info on sleeping better! Ill try to put your advice to use!

[concerningwolves]

Hey! Do you have any tips for breaking writers block when you're adhd and/or autistic? Be it your own tips or a link to another post? My friend and I need help haha

Ahh sorry you got buried under spam and old ask game asks. (I... really need to sort my ask box >.<' ). But here we go, a month late, and hopefully better late than never:

Quick ideas for beating writer's block when autistic and/or ADHD

I've got this old post I wrote on writer's block and focus troubles. Ironically, this was before my autism diagnosis but the tips still happen to be things I, an autistic person, did to manage writing when faced with executive dysfunction (except I didn't know what executive dysfunction was at that point lol). I'm linking this with one important caveat, though: if you have ADHD, "stepping away" might do more harm than good; struggling to start tasks is a Big Thing with ADHD, so not starting the task at all is entirely counterproductive. (Unless you're in burnout! Here's a post about the differences between block and burnout with some ideas on what to do for each, in case that's at all helpful to you).

And here's something yoinked from another old ask-answer:

sometimes a break from more “serious” writing is what you need. Maybe try and take the characters from your main project and drop them somewhere else for the hell of it. I like to throw my characters into the MCU without warning like “lmao have fun in a strange modern world where there are gods and a guy in an iron flying suit bye.” Or, if fandom cross-overs aren’t your thing, find a writing prompt or take an idea you like and use it to form a short story with your characters instead.

Some other ideas I've seen around for writer's block with ADHD/Autism are:

Try voice recording or text to speech (i.e., absolute stream-of-consciousness unfiltered brain-to-mouth, giving yourself permission to 100% bullshit if you like, and see what rattles loose in the brain box)

Stream of consciousness writing in general, not even necessarily about a particular prompt or particular project. This one can be done in combination with:

Writing sprints! One minute timers, two minute timers, five minutes – set it for as long as you want, but when you're fighting executive dysfunction and/or difficulty focusing, the burst of urgency that comes from a shorter timer is very helpful.

And speaking of the sense of urgency: gamify your writing! There are different ways to do this, with varying elements of risk. I'll link some ways to do this at the end under "resources".

Exercise. I don't necessarily mean hitting the gym, but a quick burst of exercise prior to writing to get the heart rate up can help wake your brain up a bit. (Or, if you find repetitive exercise mind-numbingly boring like I do, the writing sure does start to look appealing lol).

Meditation. Okay, this one is sort of 🤔 for me, because I do often hear from fellow autistics and our ADHD cousins that meditation is literally impossible for us. It is for me. But! Like with exercise above, if meditation bores you instead of helping relax and ""clear your mind"", you can probably use that boredom to your advantage. Or, it might work as intended.

Change your workspace/situation/routine. Sometimes the problem is that you need new sensory input, or that your brain has gotten thoroughly bored and decided not to tell you. Use a different chair. Move to the kitchen table. Write at a different time of day. Have a different snack (or try having a snack while writing...). Basically, look at what you're currently trying, and see how you can do it differently.

It's also really good practise to get comfortable with Being Bad At Writing. Perfectionism and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria are the biggest, meanest brain weasels with the sharpest teeth. Don't let them bully you. It sucks. It takes a lot of time and effort and internal work, which is why I was loathe to include this on a post of quick solutions, but. It is important.

And getting comfortable with this doesn't necessarily mean learning how to accept critique, or accepting that sometimes you'll write things that suck. It means accepting that sometimes you won't handle critique or feedback well, and also accepting that you won't always manage to beat the writer's block or be productive. Sometimes you have to make peace with the fact that you're going to feel horrible, feel your feelings, and try to remind yourself on the other side that none of it means you're a talentless hack.

Resources

Anything with a 🪙 next to it is paid only (I've tried to limit these and find alternatives).

The resources are split into things that "gameify" writing (i.e., hack your dopamine/serotonin in ways that reaaaaallly help autistic and ADHD folks), writing programs that are designed to help you focus, writing programs that track your habits and appeal to the "ohhhh numbers going up" brain, focus-aiding apps, and some miscellaneous stuff. Under the cut to save your dashes.

"Gamifying" your writing:

The Most Dangerous Writing App – You can't stop typing before your set timer runs out, or you risk losing your work. Excellent for warming up, stream-of-consciousness, or if you're feeling reckless, working on your actual project. I did a lot of the second draft of When Dealing with Wolves on this thing (it was terrifying yet highly effective).

Written? Kitten! – Get rewarded for meeting your set writing wordcount with kitten pictures. Haven't used this one personally, but heard wonderful things about it.

4TheWords 🪙 – This one gamifies writing in the most literal sense. As in, it's an online game where you defeat monsters, explore and level up by writing words. I did the free trial a couple years back, and I've heard there are a lot of different ways you can lower the subscription cost. The only reason I haven't gone back to it is because I feel like I can't justify spending money on it when I'm doing fine with Scrivener and free resources, but maybe one day I will purely for the fun factor...

StimuWrite – similar idea to Written Kitten; the app provides visual/audio stimulation while you write, which is great for many ADHD-ers and autistics. There's a progress bar, soundscape options, typing effects and emoji reactions as rewards, among other features.

Write or Die – This is The Most Dangerous Writing App meets Written Kitten. As far as I can figure out, the basic web version is free to use; you can set the parameters like how how long you want to write for, how many words to reach, and whether you want rewards for meeting goals or punishments for failing to meet them. There's also a stimulus mode, where the nice auditory stimulus goes away if you stop writing.

Minimalist/Focus writing programs:

Focus Writer [Windows] – thoroughly stripped-down minimalist word processor. As far as I know, it has basic functions like find-replace, but mostly it's designed only for writing. Not for formatting, spellchecking or editing.

iA Writer 🪙 [iOS] – Similar to Focus Writer, it's designed to fill your screen with a simple workspace. Allows you to use markdown formatting, and has a feature called Focus Mode that blurs out everything except the sentence you're typing. (If I could find a Windows-friendly alternative to this with that same feature I would be so happy). A cheaper alternative is 1Writer, but that doesn't have the focus mode.

Typewrite Something – Absolutely bare minimum web-based typewriter simulator. Basically just a blank screen that you start typing on, and the words appear in a typewriter font. Great for stream-of-consciousness without the risk level of TMDWA because you can't backspace. If you don't like the clacky sound, turn off your volume.

Focus Apps

Cold Turkey – Block applications and websites on your laptop/computer for a specified period of time. You can even block the entire internet.

Forest – Similar to Cold Turkey in that it stops you from seeking distractions or getting distracted. Set a timer and the app starts growing a tree. If you leave the app, the tree dies. Once you have a tree, you add it to your forest.

Habit-building writing programs:

Novlr – Simple, minimal layout, and tracks your writing goals per month and day, and your daily streak. There are more features in the plus and pro versions, and you can only have five projects in the free version, but otherwise it looks like a good free alternative to the next two programs:

750 Words 🪙 – Made for free writing, but also very useful for drafting. I had it for a month or so a while back on the free trial. It tracks writing streaks and gives you fun graphs and statistics at the end of each session, including number of distractions, actual typing time vs total time and average words per minute. Also, it analyses the mood of what you wrote, which I always found delightful.

Writing Analytics 🪙 – If writing streaks, badges and analytical graphs get your dopamine going, then I really recommend this one. The writing screen itself is very minimalistic, but it still shows your writing speed (I loved watching that go up) and your goal progress. In terms of analytics, it tracks a LOT of different things, including time spent writing vs revising, average wordcounts per day/month/year, and words written vs words deleted. I used this for about a year before I switched to Scrivener, and the switch was purely because I needed something that wasn't subscription-based. (Apparently since I stopped using it there's also a new feature that lets you create private writing rooms and see other writer's progress).

Misc.

WriteTrack – Not a word processor, but it has very good tools for tracking and planning your writing. Again, if graphs going up helps your brain, this is excellent, but you can't see it in real time.

10 ADHD-friendly brain tricks for writers – what it says on the tin: ten tips for writers with ADHD; I'm particularly fond of "Put away one knife", which breaks the nebulous task of "start writing" into something really simple like just... pull out your desk chair.

[mythosidhesdollhouse]

Sooooooooo I don't know if I'm just biased from working with my Naturally Perfect pair or entering a new era of my doll collection or what, but earlier today I was browsing through aaaaaaaaaall the new dolls Target added to their site recently--new MH, new RH, new LOL OMG, Dream Besties, Naturalistas wave 2--ALL THE DOLLS--dolls we've been awaiting for weeks, in some cases months. And now that they're here, what's the only thing I'm really feeling excited about? This Disney ILY 4ever 18" Doll Inspired by Ariel. I could care less about this brand or her character theming, I just think she's such a beautiful doll. It will probably take a few weeks, but she will definitely be joining the family as soon as I can manage it.

More rambling about dolls I don't have (yet)--

I think I may be suffering from a general fashion doll burnout, because aside from this girlie lately I've been browsing a lot more 18" & 14" dolls and a lot fewer 12" and under. Kind of getting bored with the lack of height variety...and tbh I'm finding it's actually a lot easier to make clothing for dolls in the larger size range. I've even started a list of other future acquisitions I'd like to make, though at this point I have no time frame for when any of this might happen XD

Right now at the top of my list are:

Positively Perfect Fresh Dreamers Willow

Our Generation Carlina & Opal

HBCyoU Homecoming Queen Nicole

Healthy Roots Marisol

And then of course there's the American Girl sized elephant in the room XD I will not begin to convey my frustration when last week the purple haired girl on the left was 60% off during Prime Day, and me without the funds to purchase her T_T Honestly it seems like fate has been thwarting my desire to own one of these dolls for the past 30+ years. Will it happen? Someday? Idk, maybe. At this point I'm not going to try to force it.

(P.S. ~ If you are one of the people who 'thrifts AG dolls all the time' I'm happy for you but please don't feel obligated to tell me about it, unless you want to send me one. There are no good thrift stores in my area, and even if we did have them my current health situation makes such an outing impossible. I have no doubt the dolls are out there, but I have no way to get to them. Reminding me of this fact serves no purpose other than to make me feel bad about it :/)

So yeah that's it, basically just a long post about window shopping XD Do you have any favorite doll brands of the larger 'Girl' variety that I missed?