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#but also we only ever see him wear things like that when he's happy without Caleb trying to destroy that
dazais-guardian-angel · 6 months
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went to my first con in 4 years on Friday to meet Kaiji Tang and got a Dazai autograph + video recording of him reading to me. He was the sweetest person (as I knew he would be) and interacting with him was lovely, but also at the same time oh boy it sure was an extremely stressful, ugly wake-up call of what it feels like to live in a world now where everyone around you has blissfully moved on from covid and can enjoy things normally and happily, while you'll forever be trapped in a hellscape of perpetual fear 🫠🫠🫠
#like. to be clear this was the first time i've been literally anywhere but doctor's appointments in 4 years#not just because of the pandemic but because of mental and physical exhaustion#so it was a Big Mistake to go from 0 to 100 and not ease myself into it at all#but at the same time........ it was a fucking hellscape of people. i don't think any kind of buildup could have prepared me for it at all.#it was so much less crowded in 2020 (ironically the very last place i ever went; literally on the BRINK of covid)#and now idk what it's become. a monster con. it was unbelievable.#but i was only there for less than an hour but i was so so so terrified that i very nearly left before even seeing him#i couldn't even fully enjoy meeting him as kind as he was because i was so anxious and distracted#and when i got back to the car i just fucking cried.........#the last five days i've just been sitting in fear waiting to feel Any sort of symptoms#i wore two masks and again was barely there for long but Still#and everyone around me was so chill as if everything was normal and No One was wearing a mask :))))) it's not fucking fair man :)))))#insert the 'they don't know' meme; they don't know how much covid can destroy your body even if you get a 'mild' case#i would never want to be that ignorant even if i wasn't disabled and didn't have reason to worry (but everyone has reason to worry!!!)#but also. ignorance is bliss and it just really fucking sucks man.#it really fucking sucks. why do they get to be happy and enjoying life and not /me?/#why can't i do just ONE thing for myself without having it tainted by anxiety and fear that i'm going to die horribly???#while they get to do fucking EVERYTHING???#if they all just wore masks we could all enjoy ourselves much more comfortably than some of us are now#but no that's too much to ask from people 🙃🙃🙃#shit sucks man. the world sucks. something that should be a happy memory for me was simultaneously the most awful experience#and i don't know how to feel about it now that it's over#he knew that i was afraid and at the end he told me that he hoped to see me again at another event someday#and that made me cry because it felt like dazai telling me to live. and i want to. but i don't know how to when the world is like this now.#i desperately want to be able to see him again someday but right now after how terrifying that was i never want to go to a con ever again..#i wanted to ask him things about the manga and about dazai but i was being rushed and stressed so i couldn't ugh#(and doing that is hard enough anyway cause disability and i have to talk with my phone bahhhh)#at least i was able to give him my note *sigh*
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Never Yours
Pairings: Azriel x Reader, Azriel x Elain, Lucien x Reader
Summary: Azriel never regretted his decisions so much like he does right now.
Warnings: Angst (like a lot), fluff (also a lot because we need a balance)
Words: 6.1k
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You were born in Day Court during the longest and the warmest day of the year: Summer Solstice. Even though it's not a custom to exchange gifts on that holiday, your parents always told you that you were their greatest gift and that the sun shined brighter that day like he knew that you would be entering this world very soon. 
Your father was Helion's best and longest friend, and he had a place in his Court as his second in command and advisor. Your mother was the lead healer of the Court. She was one of the most powerful and talented healers of Prythian, being a very close second to Madja. 
Due to your parents' jobs, you grew up in the Day Court Palace and close to Helion, who didn't just happen to be your High Lord but also your godfather. 
Your parents reconsider that maybe making Helion your godfather had been a mistake because of how much he spoiled you. On your 4th birthday, he gave you a black baby pegasus as a present, which you decided to name him Blackjack. When he discovered that you liked reading, he had a private library built in your room with all kinds of books. When you were seven and heard an old male saying that females should only wear dresses, you only wore pants for the next three months and of course, Helion made sure you had every type of pants at your disposal. 
When your parents tried to scold him, he just scoffed with his only response being, "She's my goddaughter. What else am I supposed to do?" with a big grin plastered in his face.
You weren't Helion's child, but he always treated you like one, and that never changed, especially after your parents' death. 
Your favorite thing about your parents was their mating bond. After you learned that mates are rare and a blessing, it made every single thing about your parents' love even more unique and pure.
You saw first hand what true love is really like. You saw how much they loved, cared, supported, and protected each other. You saw loyalty and honesty in their deepest forms. Seeing your parents' mating bond made you wish to the stars for a mate, and that one day, you would be blessed enough to find him. 
But you also saw how deep a mating bond could go. You saw it first hand, too.
You saw it when your mother died after getting infected by a rare disease while trying to help her patients. Her death destroyed your father. The pain and the grief of losing your mother, his mate, and the love of his life were so big that your father followed her into the next life a few days later, so they could start their next journey together.
Before he died, your father made Helion promise him that he would take care of you, which he agreed without hesitation. He became more protective of you. He couldn't stop thinking how unfair it was for you to lose your parents at such a young age, only eleven years old, when Helion had them for centuries.
Your godfather made sure to provide you with anything you needed from the best education to the best clothes and when your healing powers start manifesting and you decide to follow your mother's steps, Helion called in a favor to Thesan to see if he could teach you himself. The High Lord of Dawn was happy to accept, and so were you at the thought of having him as your teacher.
You moved to Dawn Court for a year where you learned everything about being a healer, not only with the High Lord himself but also with his best healers. 
You became one of the best: talented, powerful, gifted, and wise. Just like your mother.
Madja was looking for an apprentice at the time you returned to Day, and when she heard about your skills, she asked for you. Rhysand reached out to Helion with Madja's offer: you would be her apprentice, work in the clinic with her but you would also assist her if she ever needed to go to a patient's residence, and would learn everything she could teach you. 
It wasn't needed to convince you to agree. You had heard about Madja and her healing, after Thesan, she was the healer you wanted to work with the most, so of course you were more than happy to have a chance to have her as your mentor. Rhysand added that you would be welcome to stay in one of his personal residences, the House of Wind, during your time in Velaris.
You were only supposed to stay in the Night Court for a year, but that was before you met the Shadowsinger. 
However, despite wanting the apprenticeship more than anything, if you had known what would happen when you agreed to go to the Night Court, you would never have accepted the offer.
-
Azriel couldn't sleep.
No matter how much he tried, he couldn't. Not with tomorrow so close, not when he knew what was waiting for him in the morning. 
The past was haunting him tonight, his thoughts hadn't stopped since he had been informed earlier of tomorrow's meeting. So now, here he was, trying to keep his eyes open even though his body was protesting for him to do the opposite.
But he was fighting that need because every time he closed his eyes, you were all he saw. Your beautiful face with your sparkling eyes, your smooth hair, your pointy ears, your sweet voice, and your soft laughter. You were haunting his thoughts like a punishment for all those years ago. 
So all he could do now was to sit on the edge of his balcony with his legs hanging off while waiting for the sun to be born, and remember how things used to be before he destroyed everything.
 -
Everything was perfect in the beginning. Velaris was beautiful, the people were kind, and the pastries were absolutely delicious. 
The only thing you actually missed, besides Helion, was the warmth of the sun like no other Court had but the Day Court. But that was just the Day citizen in you talking.
Your apprenticeship was going amazing. You and Madja had instantly connected, and you were learning so much. Two weeks later, you were already attending your own patients without supervision. You really had a gift, and every time Madja complimented your powers, you gave all the credits to your genes, to your mom. It warmed your heart knowing that the Mother had blessed you with this part of her. In this way, it felt like she was always with you.
The House of Wind felt just like home, and you adjusted perfectly. The Inner Circle had welcomed you with open arms, and you got along with everyone. They thought you and Morrigan would be the closest of all, but they got a big surprise when it turned out to be you and Azriel.
The Shadowsinger was different from everyone you ever met. Everyone in Day was so loud, open, and extroverted. But not him. He was calm, reserved, and difficult to read, but with time, you ended up finding out that the two of you were more alike than you thought. You were able to go through the shell that Azriel had so perfectly built around him over the centuries. 
A friendship was born. Every day, Azriel would fly you to the clinic and then back to the House. You explored Velaris together and made your personal mission to try every single restaurant and bakery from the City of Starlight. 
You walked along the Sidra and even stopped once in a while to dance along the melodies that the musicians were playing. You would read together whether that was in the library, in your room, or in his. You even started training with him and sometimes, Cassian.
You became each other's person. When a day at the clinic was hard or you would lose a patient, he was there to hug and comfort you, and you found yourself doing the same for him about his missions. So you decided to take the next step and spoke about your parents' death, how much still affected you losing them.
And in that moment, Azriel realized how much trust you put in him, so he decided to return it and opened about his past, his family, and his hands. You listened to every word, cleaned every tear, and held him for as long as he needed.
You found yourself falling in love with him a little more day by day, and it only took you a few months to realize that you were completely in love.
The day the bond snapped was one of the happiest days of your life. It happened during the most beautiful celebration in the Night Court: Starfall.
Your hair was tied in a long braid that reached down to your waist, decorating the braid were small yellow daylilies. You were wearing a golden dress that fit perfectly against your sun-kissed skin. The dress had a slit on the left side that went up to the top of your thigh, a single strap held the dress on your right shoulder and when you turned around, whoever was behind you could have a perfect view of your naked back. Golden jewels rested on your ears and neck. 
You looked like a goddess, one blessed by the sun itself. You were shining just like a Day Court citizen should.
Azriel standed next to you in the balcony while gazing at the spirits passing. Both of your hands rested on the stone of the balcony, and when you went to adjust your hand, it brushed against Azriel's. At the new feeling, you looked up to find his eyes, only to see the Shadowsinger already looking at you. In that moment, with the touching of your hands and the meeting of your eyes, the world stopped.
Your hands start interviewing, and everything else just disappeared.
It was just the two of you and the sound of your heartbeats. And then, a golden thread appeared and started tying your hearts and souls.
Azriel held your free hand and pressed it against his own chest, right where his heart laid. You followed his action, freeing your intertwined hands and putting his hand on your chest, above your heart. 
With the final loop of the golden thread around your hearts, Azriel bent down and kissed you. 
That moment couldn't be more beautiful and magical even if you tried. You had finally found the mate that you had wished to the stars all those years ago. 
Everything was perfect. You had everything you wanted and more. You lived in a beautiful city that you learned to love and were starting to call it home. You had the job of your life, working alongside one of your idols. Amazing friends that made you feel welcomed and part of a little family. And finally, your mate, the male you were in love with, long before that beautiful and sacred golden thread. Everything was perfect.
But of course, nothing lasts forever. And all of that disappeared when Elain Archeron came into the picture.
-
Ten years. He couldn't believe that much time had passed. All those years without you.
It had been ten years since the last time he saw you. Ten years since he had heard something regarding you. Ten years since he had broken your heart. And ten years since he had made the biggest mistake of his entire existence.
You had moved back to Day Court after that day, after what happened and after what he did. 
The High Lord of Day had forbidden Azriel from seeing you and from trying to contact you in any way. And months later, when the rumors of a certain Shadowsinger flying above the Palace in hopes to get a glimpse of you reached his ears, Helion banned him from his Court.
Helion had always been a very charismatic and loving person. He's kind, generous, and a very good friend. He gets along with almost everyone, always joking around and laughing.  Some people may say that he's the nicest and kindest High Lord that Prythian has ever seen. 
When problems arise, he always tries to find a solution to solve them or if a solution is not possible, a way to improve them. But not this time. Not when it comes to you and his son, Lucien.
Because your heart wasn't the only one to be shattered that day, no, Lucien's heart was a victim, too. So, from that moment, everything that Helion did was to protect you and Lucien, to make sure that you felt safe, that you had space and time to heal. You thought that was ironic, considering you were a healer yourself.
Azriel's banishment wasn't the only consequence from the events of that day.
That day also cost the alliance between the Day Court and the Night Court, and when the alliance fell apart, so did Helion and Rhysand's friendship.
But Azriel wasn't the only one to blame for all of this. Elain Archeron was guilty, too. She, too, was banished from the Day Court and forbidden to contact Lucien in any way.
But unlike Azriel, Elain's actions cause far more consequences than his. 
The Autumn Court followed the same decisions as the Day Court. The banishment of Azriel and Elain and the prohibition of any kind of contact with Lucien. Eris, now the new High Lord of the Autumn Court after Beron's death, didn't take lightly to what happened to his little brother. 
The two of them had reconnected after Eris became High Lord. They talked through everything that had happened in the last centuries, made peace with their past, and decided to move forward together. Now, the brothers were inseparable and had the kind of relationship they had always wanted since they were younger. So when Eris heard what had happened, he considered those actions as a personal attack. 
He went as far as to offer Lucien the opportunity to choose the Blood Duel, which his little brother refused, saying that all of this had already caused enough pain. Eris wasn't angry just because of Lucien. He was angry because of you, too. You were the first person to give him the benefit of the doubt, the first one to not judge him, unlike the others you tried to get to know him, to be his friend and he let you. 
You were the first one to know the real Eris, to know what he hid behind the mask. Therefore, you had a special place in his heart. Even if you didn't share the same blood, you were part of his family.
But that didn't stop with Day and Autumn.  Spring joined them, too. 
Despite everything that happened and the fact that they were still working on their friendship, Tamlin's loyalty remained with Lucien. Spring had been Lucien's home for decades, and with that came a brotherhood between the two of them. 
Needless to mention that Jurian and Vassa's loyalties also remained with Lucien.
To everyone outside the situation, all of this may seem overreacted and exaggerated. But to everyone involved, it's not.
After all, you and Lucien almost died. That's what happens when a mating bond is rejected.
-
Azriel couldn't believe things had turned out this way. He was so sure that the Cauldron was wrong, that he belonged with Elain. Three sisters for three brothers. How more poetic could it be?
There were signals everywhere: Feyre with Rhysand, Nesta with Cassian, and Elain with him. Elain wouldn't go close to Lucien or talk to him, but she would sit next to him whether during dinners or on the couch, she would talk to him, and requested his company when she went to the garden or to the city. Even his shadows disappeared every time he was with her.
Weren't those signals clear enough? They were meant to be. The Cauldron was wrong. 
So Azriel did what he thought was right. He rejected the mating bond with you, and Elain did the same with Lucien. 
He never thought that the rejection of the bond would've almost cost your life.
That memory still gave him nightmares to this day. How pale you turned, how you sank to your knees with your hand pressed against your chest, tears running free down your cheeks and muffled screams leaving your lips. How much pain you had suffered and how he had been the cause of it. How once, not that long ago, he had been the reason for your smiles, laughs, and giggles.
But that memory wasn't his. It was Rhysand's. Rhys, who had to go through your mind shields, and knock you unconscious so the pain would stop and that memory led him to another memory. 
The memory of that day and the things that had followed after he shattered your heart.
-
Azriel wasn't there the moment it happened. No, he was too busy kissing Elain after admitting how much they craved each other. 
And while he kissed Elain, he felt that golden thread tying the two of you breaking and start slowly to disappear.
Nothing could have prepared him for that last memory of you when he and Elain were summoned to the River House a few hours later.
Rhys had shown him not as a courtesy but as a lesson of how much his actions can affect others. But you weren't just some other. You were his mate. Former mate. Ex-mate.
Azriel made a move to go find you. He needed to explain it to you, and he needed you to understand, but you were already gone.
Rhys told him that after you regained consciousness, Lucien took you with him back to Day Court. 
Lucien. Who you had become instantly friends with since the male's arrival in Velaris. You had treated him just like you were when you moved to the Night Court. You showed him the city, the good restaurants and the best pastries, and also told him about Helion, now that he knew the High Lord was his father and he was his Heir. You wanted him to feel like home, just like you did. 
When Azriel made his intentions clear to go to Day and find you, Rhys showed him the letter Helion had sent. The one that forbidden him from seeing you and from trying to contact you in any way. The one that also had the same indications to Elain regarding Lucien. And that if any of them tried to disobey his orders, there would be consequences.
Azriel knew of protective the male was of you and that he would do anything to protect his family, so for a split second, Azriel found himself fearing the High Lord. 
Rhysand also ordered them to stay away from the two of you, stating that they had already created enough problems and the Night Court could not afford a war with Day. 
After they left his office, Rhys sat down on his chair, trying to think how he was gonna solve this. His mind kept going back to you and Lucien. 
He was there when Lucien came for you, the red headed male was also pale and every few minutes, his hand would press to his chest in pain, his eyes were still red, probably from the tears he had shed.
Rhys knew that Helion's letter wouldn't be the only one he would receive that day. And like he was right, three more letters arrived during it. First from Autumn, then Spring and the last one from the Band of Exiles. 
Rhys passed a hand through his black hair and released a long sigh, Azriel and Elain actions had just cost four allies to the Night Court.
-
When you and Lucien arrived in Day, Helion almost fell to his knees at your sight.
You were in Lucien's arms, your eyes half open with tears still following down your cheeks. One of your hands was against your chest, rubbing small circles in a way of trying to get rid of the pain. Lucien wasn't much better.
Helion headed towards you and started examining you for injuries, but he found nothing, and when confusion made his way to his features, Lucien told him everything.
The confusion was replaced by anger, but the anger wasn't just directed towards the Shadowsinger and the middle Archeron sister. Some of it was towards himself. 
Towards himself, because seeing you like that, Helion felt that he had broken the promise he made to your dad and that this was his fault.
Without giving time for any more thoughts to fill his mind, Helion led Lucien to your room, where the Heir laid you on the bed. You had fallen asleep in his arms with your cheeks still stained. 
Lucien sat on the chair by your desk that was placed in front of your bed and said to Helion that he would stay with you. Helion gave him a firm nod, remembering that Lucien didn't have a room yet in his Palace, but he was about to fix that.
Helion didn't waste any time after making sure that the two of you were okay for now. 
He called two of his servants to prepare a room for the young Heir and went straight to his office where he wrote the letter and sent it to Rhysand.
The next week's were a complicated ones but showed that time was the best healer. 
You no longer spend the days locked in your room alone. You started to eat properly again and went back to work. Day by day, you were smiling more and sometimes making jokes.
Lucien improved as well. He decided to live in the Day Court for the time being and took his place as Helion's second in command. His relationship with Helion was also getting stronger over time. They were making up for the lost time.
But that wasn't the only thing that changed. Your relationship with Lucien also changed.
You got closer than ever, due to the fact you were the only ones who knew what the other was going through.
You found comfort in each other's presence and started spending more time together to the point where you became each other's favorite person. 
Little by little, you start helping each other heal. You started putting back together the pieces that had been broken, and the pain started slowly fading until the day that it didn't hurt anymore.
You two mended your hearts and souls, and for the first time, in a long time, you were full again.
Your friendship grew, and so did your feelings for each other.
-
Azriel couldn't believe how wrong he had been. Because the Cauldron wasn't wrong, it had never been wrong. 
He was the one who was wrong. Right from the beginning.
He and Elain had tried a relationship after yours and Lucien's departure. It worked for six months until it didn't.
Azriel questioned himself why the relationship was starting to fail and why being with Elain was starting to feel wrong.
It didn't take him too long to understand the reason. It was because she wasn't you. He found out that the reason his shadows disappear every time he was with Elain wasn't because they were destined but because they were with you. 
His shadows would leave him and Elain to go find you, like they were stating that they wouldn't betray you, that they chose you. On the day he broke up with Elain, he found his shadows in your old room, which once was filled with colors, books, paintings, and light, and now was empty, dusty, and dark. The shadows were swimming around your Starfall dress, the one you wore on the day your bond had snapped. The sight of the dress was painful, and he understood why it had been left behind.
Azriel had tried to apologize, he flew to Day Court and around the Palace trying to find you but he never did and the next day Helion sent a letter with his and Elain's banishment, making Autumn and Spring to have the same decision. 
He understood why, they were trying to protect you and Lucien, and even though he didn't have the right, he just wanted to know if you were okay. Ironic, considering he was the reason you were suffering. 
He asked Rhys several times if he knew something about you, and Rhys revealed to him that you weren't talking to him or the other members of the Inner Circle either. You had stated that it was too early and still very painful. 
So they respected your decision and kept their distance. 
That had caused Azriel's guilt to grow even more. How he wished for Nesta to still have her powers so he could go back in time and repair all of this.
The light of the sun broke his thoughts. The sun was finally making its appearance in the orange and yellow sky. 
Azriel released a long breath and looked at the clock perched on his bedroom wall. 
The morning was here, and he was only two hours away from seeing you.
-
The Inner Circle stood at the entrance of the Day Court Palace. 
Helion had lifted the banishment for this meeting with yours and Lucien consent.
Both of you said that it had been a long time and that the past should stay in the past, but that didn't mean you would be accepting any apologies today.
Koschei was on the rise again, and Prythian needed to come together once more. Right now, your past didn't matter.
The doors swung open, and the Inner Circle made their way inside. A servant led them to the conference room located in the same hallway as Helion's office on the first floor of the Palace.
They sat at the marble table while the servant informed them, "The High Lord will be here in a few minutes." Receiving a nod and a 'Thank you' from Rhysand, the servant left.
Rhys started, "Y/N and Lucien will also be in this meeting. Now, Helion was nice enough to allow the two of you back here, so do not ruin this." He finished while looking at Azriel and Elain, making them both nod their heads.
Helion entered the room, and the Inner Circle raised from their seats. The High Lord of the Day Court made his way to the head of the table. He turned to the side where Rhys, Feyre, and his Inner Circle stood at his left before offering his hand to Rhys to shake it.
Taken by surprise, Rhys needed a few seconds to process what was happening before accepting his hand. Once they had shaken hands, everyone returned to their seats, but not before Helion sent a disapproving look in Azriel's and Elain's direction.
A few minutes into the meeting, the door to the conference room opened again. And there you were. 
You were dressed in Day attire, a beautiful white dress that hugged your body, with your hair loosen and golden jewelry adorned your neck and ears. Lucien was by your side also wearing Day attire, one that matched Helion's, with your hand in his.
The Inner Circle held their breaths at your sight. It had been ten years, but all the memories came flashing back to them. 
You looked the same, but when you two approached the table, that's when they saw it and shock spread all over their faces.
Azriel couldn't believe what he was seeing. He didn't know what he was expecting to see at this meeting, but it wasn't this.
It wasn't the golden ring that you and Lucien had matching on your left hands informing him that you were married that shocked him.
It was the small and round belly that your free hand was resting on and the sweet vanilla scent that was filling the air. The scent of yours and Lucien's baby. 
"Apologies for our delay," Lucien started, then looking in your direction with a smile continued "Someone had a big appetite this morning." He ended with a laugh.
You looked at his gaze, a genuine smile on your lips. "Shut up." You whispered.
Lucien grabs the back of your chair, pulling it to give you enough space to sit. "Thank you, my love." You said while watching him taking the seat at your right, making you stay seated between him and Helion.
For the first time since you entered the room, you looked at the people in front of you. "Night Court," you greeted with a small smile. 
Feyre was the first to say "Congratulations Y/N. And Lucien." 
Lucien spoke this time. "Thank you, Feyre." He rested his hand on your belly.
"How far long are you?" Rhysand's voice reached your ears.
Looking in his direction, you answered, "23 weeks. Lucien thinks it's a girl, but I think it's a boy," you added. That made Rhys smile.
"I always took you for a boy mom." Amren's voice surprised you and couldn't help but smile at her words. "Congratulations to you two, the Mother knows you deserve it." She finished with a genuine smile.
Lucien looked at Azriel and Elain before directing his eyes to the ancient one "Yes we do. Thank you, Amren." Lucien paused for a second before turning in Helion's direction and continuing. “Let's not keep holding on to the meeting. Please go on, dad." 
Helion proceeded with the meeting, but Azriel didn't listen to a word that was said. He couldn't tear his eyes from you and Lucien. 
There was no doubt of the love you two shared, not when it was written in both of your eyes. He didn't miss Lucien caresing your belly, and pushing a strand of hair behind your ear, passing his thumb over your jaw and kissing your cheek after.
Or how you rested your right hand on top of his on your belly while your left passed through his long red hair before resting around his shoulders and your smile while doing it.
What bigger proof did he need of your love if not for the baby you were carrying? Lucien's baby, he kept telling himself. Not his. Lucien's.
Jealousy invaded his body, but there was nothing he could do. He made his decision ten years ago, and now he had to live with it.
Lost in his thoughts, he only realized the meeting was over when everyone started standing. Rhys and Helion were finishing talking, and when the doors opened one more time, Eris Vanserra walked in with a little ginger boy in his arms. He couldn't be more than five years old.
He looked exactly like Lucien, except for his eyes. Those were yours. 
Azriel's heart sank, and it sank even more a few seconds later, when the little boy spotted you and Lucien. You already had a baby and you were about to have your second.
With a big smile appearing on his sweet face, the little boy almost shouted, "Mommy! Daddy!" The boy jumped from his uncle's arms and ran to you.
You bend down and gather the happy boy in your arms before standing again and passing a hand through his ginger curls and saying, "Hi baby." You peppered his face with kisses making him laugh even more "I thought you were having fun with your uncle." You said looking at your brother in law.
Your son pouted “Uncle Eris doesn't know how to play. He onlys wants to do the boring stuff mommy.”
Everyone in the room chuckled, Eris gasped with fake hurt “Excuse me?”
“Elijah.” Lucien chuckled and said to your son after joining your side “Don't be rude to your uncle.” 
“But it’s the truth, daddy.” Elijah hid his face on your neck. 
Eris approached the little family with a smile directed to his nephew. "Sorry. I tried to keep him entertained, but he just kept asking about you two." 
Lucien noticed his older brother had paint and glitter on his white shirt and laughed at the thought of his son giving him a hard time before exclaiming, "It's alright, brother. We were about to leave anyway." 
The little boy settled in your arms and rested his head against yours, Lucien started rubbing his back when the little boy caught the sight of his grandfather and asked before anyone could stop him "Grandpa, how was the meeting with the idiots from the Night Court?" 
The room went quiet, and a few gasps escaped. At your son's words, you turned to look at Helion, now on mom's mood. "Helion! How many times do we have to tell you not to speak like that in front of him?" 
The room erupted in laughter at your statement.  The air became lighter, and Helion put his hands in surrender, promising you that it wouldn't happen again. 
You gave him an incredulous look, saying that you didn't believe him. Your son wrapped his tiny arms around your neck and rested his head on your shoulder with a yawn leaving his lips. 
You rubbed your son's back while speaking to him. "Cmon Elijah, let's leave before your grandpa comes up with a new bad word for you to learn." 
“Bad grandpa” your son agreed with you while earning new chuckles from the Night Court. 
Even though he was trying to hold his smile, Azriel failed, your son was too adorable.
You turned your gaze to the Inner Circle and gave them a smile. "It was good to see you all." 
"You too, Y/N. I missed you." Cassian replied.
Your smile stretched before telling him, "I missed you too, Cass." 
The nickname made his heart ache. Maybe there's still a chance for you to reconnect.
You turned to look behind you, meeting your husband's eyes "You're coming Lu?" 
A pink blush made its way to Lucien's cheeks "Of course, my love" The Heir looked at his father "We'll see you at dinner, dad. Night Court." He said giving the Inner Circle a small nod before joining you and wrapping his arm around your waist and giving a kiss to your now sleeping son.
Amren spoke again “See I told you were a boy mom.” A smile never leaving her face.
“You're right. If this baby happens to be a boy as well, I'm gonna be in trouble.” You replied with a arm holding your son and while the other made it's way to your belly.
“No your not, you're gonna be great.” Nesta spoke, a genuine smile on her lips “We already can see you are.” She gestured to the little boy sleeping in your arms. 
“Thank you, Nes.” You were grateful for her words.
On your way out, you met Azriel's eyes but you couldn't find the words so you simply gave him a nod with a small smile and Azriel returned the gesture.
When the door closed, Amren was the first to break the silence "Well, the Mother has a sense of humor." 
Everyone turned to look at her but she focused her gaze on Azriel and Elain "You rejected them because you believed you belonged with one another only for your relationship to fail six months later. And now," she released a laugh "your former mates found their way towards each other. Fell in love, got married, had a son and have another baby on the way. Ironic isn't it?" She said with the feline smile returning to her lips. 
It was Helion who spoke next, amusement all over his face "Indeed. I guess karma is a bitch." He sent a disapproving look one more time in the direction of the two people who almost cost him his family before exiting the room.
Amren's and Helion's words stung but Azriel knew it was nothing but the truth. He realized in that moment, that despite your life now and how things turned out, you would never forgive him.
He had lost you forever and now he had to live with regret for the rest of his life.
After all, you were no longer his. 
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A/n: Thank you for reading! I'm thinking in making a general taglist so if you wish to be added let me know.
the beautiful dividers belong to @cafekitsune
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AITA for asking my boyfriend to wear lingerie?
Wow that sounds really fucking weird and this is weird but anyway
I (31M) am dating a guy (29M) and have been for about 4 years now, and we share an apartment. He's so beyond perfect and I am insanely lucky, and I'm planning on proposing to him this June.
Important to note that he is FTM. I am not, I'm very cis. He doesn't dress very masculinely, he likes dresses and skirts and stuff, which I like because he looks fucking hot in them and it makes him happy to dress like that. I haven't ever seen him wear ladies' underwear or anything like that before, only boxer briefs. I didn't really realize that till after this conflict though.
Lately I was in... a certain store for adults, picking up some undisclosed items, and noticed some lingerie that I thought would look really good on him. I ended up buying it as a gift.
When I showed it to him that night though his face just fell. He started tearing up and said he really didn't want to wear it and that he felt really insulted that I'd ask him to wear something like that. I apologized right off the bat, but I said was confused and I told him that he wears fem clothes the time. He told me that women's underwear made him feel really dysphoric and the lingerie had this thing, I forgot what he called it, but it basically makes the breasts more prominent like a wire or something (I grew up with two equally cis brothers and a mom who never talked about any of this so cut me some slack). He got top surgery years before he met me so I'm not sure what he's talking about.
Anyway. I apologized and put it back in the bag, told him I'd return it and I intend to. We ended up going to bed without having sex like we planned. He didn't touch me at all all night and didn't kiss me goodbye before he went to work the next morning.
I want to be very clear. I'm not trans, and I would never challenge him on what makes him dysphoric. But I do want him to explain what upsets him so I understand. I want to know what he's thinking so he doesn't just shut down on me.
One last thing. I know this is the drastic actions website but I don't want to see any of the "break up" comments or any sort of slander against my boyfriend. I love that boy and I am going to marry him if he'll have me.
Was I TA for getting him a gift? I wanted to surprise him but it did not turn out well. I would also appreciate any advice, especially from other trans guys. Thank you all.
What are these acronyms?
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mirohlayo · 10 months
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THE ONLY ONE | LN4
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( lando and you are on a break because of an argument. but he needs you back. )
warning : angst, fluff, some jealousy, happy ending ofc
word count : 5.1k
note : the longest thing i have ever written with 5k words 😭 pretty proud of it, hope it's not too long lol
!! english not my first language !!
lando sighs as he watches for around the 30th time your instagram story. it was a picture of your outfit of the day, but the little detail - or big detail for him - was the unknown man standing next to you and his clothes matching with yours. lando can't help but rewatch again and again your story throughout all the day. of course, he loves your outfit. he thinks everything suits you, either an elegant dress or just a big hoodie. it was not the problem. but why the fuck your outfit matched with the one of an other man than him ? he just don't understand. usually, he would be and was the only one to match with your outfit. it was kind of your love language, and lando loves it. every time you asked him to wear the same clothes as you, he never refused the offer and even lend you one of his hoodie. it is something very special for him, so when he saw you doing this with an other man than him, he really didn't like it. actually, he hated it.
and the worse ? he is once again looking at your story, laying in your shared bed in his monaco apartment, clinging to your pillow. oh poor him. there is still the scent of you and your shampoo filled in the pillow you used to sleep on when you passed the nights with your loved one. he's holding onto it anytime he's missing you, which is basically every minutes. he smells your fragrance, finding so much comfort in it. and he would also imagines you next to him, cuddling his body and playing with his hair. but these are just memories now. it seems long time ago for him, when the last time you saw each other was actually around 3 weeks now. but it was not a good last time. completely the opposite. and he curses himself when he remembers what happened that day.
"fuck, who is this... thing ? guy ?" he says, throwing his phone over the blankets. for real, who was this man next to you ? have you already forget him and moved on ? but no, you guys are still together. theoretically. yes, the last time you talked to each other was during an argument, but when you left him all alone in his apartment, you didn't say you broke up with him. you just left, furious and mostly hurt. you were on a break. you didn't talk together since the argument, didn't send any text messages that you both would always send every hours because of how much you missed each other. 3 weeks without any contacts. but the thing you don't know is lando still looking at your social medias accounts everyday, missing you dearly. sometimes he hesitates, if he should like or not your stories.
every days, every hours, every minutes, every seconds are hurtful without you. he's still playing again and again in his head the last smile he captured of you. he is missing you so fucking bad. and the only person he can blame is himself. yes, he is the one to blame at. he was the one who started the argument and the one to say the most rude and hurtful words. and he feels so much guilty about it. he can't stand the fact he was the one who hurt and upset the most precious person to his eyes. everything is his fault. and now he thinks he's just a fool who don't deserve you. it pains so much his heart, and he's getting sick of it. he needs you again. he needs to see you again. he needs to kiss and hug you again.
he let a scream out, overthinking about the situation. he grabs his phone and opens the text app. he clicks on your name, and starts typing something. but what ? hello ? hi ? can we talk together ? no. he just can't send you some stupid messages and thinks everything will be perfect again like 3 weeks ago. what was he thinking ? he sighs longly and decides to take a shower to stop thinking about you. but he damn knows that's impossible because every single thing reminds him of you.
like taking showers. you would often showered with him because he loves showering together. washing your hair and hugging you to warm your freezing body meanwhile the cold water was turning hot. and then after you doing his haircare routine, styling his damp curls while he was just looking at you with adoration. or when you guys would spend your evenings together, cuddling close under a woolen plaid on the couch, watching a movie until one of you two would fall asleep. or when you cooked some recipes and it ended up in a food battle. god he's craving of those moments again. he really needs to do something...
-
race day. it is sunday today and of course lando have to race. he don't know it, but you are in the paddock club. yes, even if you're on a break in your relationship, you couldn't miss a race and decided to attend it. those last 3 weeks, you didn't miss a single one races. you didn't attend them, because you were still hurt by lando's words and you didn't want his fans to see you present there, so you just watched the races and your papaya driver on the tv. but you missed so much seeing him in reality, so you attend today's race. of course, you are wearing glasses and a cap to not be recognizable. and you're also sitting in a hidden corner.
lando has no clue that you are here, watching his car moving around. and you have no clue that he is thinking about you and the way he's going to apologize to you. so as the race passes, you keep an eye on his car. your heart and your being feels weird. the amount of love you have for him is still here, and it never shaded away for the past 3 weeks. not a single bit. but of course you are still upset and hurt. the words he said to you broke you into tears. you love him so much, never you loved someone like that. so when he told you those mean things, you felt weak. and very very sad.
in a blink, the race is already finished. fans wave at the drivers who are celebrating the podium with their race team. you smile, admiring the place. you would be lying if you said you didn't missed races. you were always happy to attend one. maybe for the race, or maybe just to spend more time with lando. by the way, he didn't finish on the podium but still get p4. and despite the fact you are still gloomy, you are proud of him, like usually. because he's just the best after all.
now you have to leave the track. of course, you would have love to stay and join your favorite driver, but he don't know you are here and you don't want him to see you. because nobody has already apologize. and it's been 3 weeks since you haven't seen and spoken to him. it would be awkwardly embarrassing. so you have to take precautions and be prudent to not be seen by any mclaren team member. you go down the balcony's stairs, lowering your head and hiding your face with the cap. of course it has to be an orange cap, because it is the only hat you have. an other way to be even more discreet, huh. but it works well. you are now in the paddock area, just in front of the mclaren one. you recognize a lot of engineers and people who work with your boyfriend and you hope deep inside you they don't see and recognize you. but it seems like you failed it.
"y/n ?" oh. oh... it's not just anyone. it's not just a random maclaren team member. no. it is him. it's his voice. his voice that you missed hearing. it's lando norris. you stop, and don't know what to do. and don't know how to react. so you stay like this, turning your back on him. "y/n ? is it you ?" you close your eyes and exhale, you're not really in the mood to talk to him. the only person you shouldn't meet is now facing you. you turn around and keep your head low, you don't have the force to look at him.
you just remove your glasses and put them in your pocket. "why are you here ?" he asks confused, but you can tell he's concerned about it. "to... support you, i guess ?". you finally give up and cross his gaze. and it aches your heart. he looks tired, i mean of course he just finished a 2 hours race but still he looks even tired than usually. his face is pale, doesn't have much color. and his eyes are so tiny, so many emotions in them. "oh ok. huhh thank you...". he answers awkwardly. you bite your lower lip, the atmosphere is, well, very awkward yes. "so, how are you?" you ask to get rid of this tension.
how he is ? fuck this question. he doesn't even want to answer. does he really need to say that he blames himself every day, that he can't sleep because of how much he cries thinking about you, that he skips dinners because of how bad he's feeling ? he never felt like that with any person. it is the first time his whole being aches that much. but he can't tell you that, he knows you will not forgive him that easily. "good. and you ?" he says, avoiding your gaze. "good too" you hum sotfly. he knows damn well that's a lie, because even your tone betrayed you. he tries to take a look at you. his heart squeezes in pain, the view in front of him is heartbreaking. you look as tired as him. and as pale as him too. where is the smile he loves so much gone ? the shining sparkles in your pretty eyes ?
he fights the urge to pull you in his arms. but he's the one at fault, he can only blame himself. "hum, i'll go now" "no." he answers back to back and you look at him confused and surprised. "i-i mean you're going back to monaco ?" he stutters. "no, i'll join a friend of mine" you says coldly. "oh... ok..." god he sounds so sad, it pains you. you struggles to not hug him. because yes, you're hurt, but you still love him like crazy. "well... oh and good job today" you quickly say and starts to leave, not wanting to stay more here. you don't turn back, but lando is now smiling softly, watching you fade away in the crowd. "thank you, love" he whisper to himself.
he sighs, blinking slowly. now memories are coming back, and he remembers what happened that night, when everything went wrong in only one second.
- -
you were very tired. a hard day of work. so when you came home, in your lover's apartment in monaco, all you wanted was to follow him around like a puppy and cuddle him. you were so clingy and so needy. it was rare, very very rare for you to be like that, all clingy and needy, so when that night you doubled it, it was kind of surprising and shocking. usually, lando loves when you get clingy, when you want him all for yourself. because it not happens often, so of course he cherishes these moments. but that night, it was different. he didn't like the way you acted with him. you kept following him around the apartment, touching him gently and innocently. like grabbing his hand, placing soft kisses on his cheeks, back hugs. you just wanted his attention. you just wanted your lover. but he didn't seems he felt the same about you. first, he didn't care much. he just didn't returned back your affection. but the more you were getting clingy, the more he was getting angry. he started to hate it.
you tried to kiss him on the lips and instead of kissing you back roughly, he turned his head and your lips pressed against his cheek. you paused for a second, confused. you frowned and tried to understand why he did that. why your lover didn't return back your hugs ? your kisses ? why he acted like you didn't even exist ? you placed your hand on his forearm but he shifted. your heart squeezed, why was he like this ? usually, he was the neediest one and the one getting even clingier. you were lost.
"baby, why you don't kiss me back ?" you asked softly. lando sighed and he seemed annoyed. he didn't even dare to reply. which hurt you. you moved and stopped before him. "something is wrong ? something bothers you ?" you tried to understand why he was in this mood, you wanted to help him talk about whatever bothered his thoughts. but you didn't expect to hear that. "yes, you." he hissed. your face deformed. did you hear well ? "w-what ?" you stuttered. "you. it's you. you fucking annoy me". you blinked and took some few steps back. your being hurt, your heart was broken. "what do you mean ?"
"you're so clingy and needy and i fucking hate it. stop being like that and stop touching me. you're so annoying" he threw these words at you, giving you a death look as his furrowed his brows. oh pain was real. you felt weak, you thought it was all a dream. but no, your lover was here, saying harsh words to you and kept hurting your poor little heart. and while you tried to understand his behavior - because he would never talk bad to you like that - a bulb lighted in your head.
it was qualifying. you remembered lando's week went bad and hard for him. bad practices, no luck, his slow car, his poor performance... nothing went right. and you knew how much f1 had an important impact on him and his mental health. he was so hard on himself and sometimes he would overthink about why he sucks at racing. this explains why he was acting like a shit with you. you knew it was that. he didn't want to do a bad race tomorrow. so instead of calm down and talk about it with you, he let out all his anger on you. it was like he took you as a punching ball and kept punching you, until you broke in pieces. you understand how he felt, racing is his job, he has to be the best. but let out his anger on your poor person even though you did nothing wrong, you couldn't take that. yes, he had the right to be angry and annoyed and whatever, but being harsh towards you won't make his performance better. so you tried to talk with him. or maybe argue with him.
"lando, please. i know you don't mean what you say." he stared at you and then walk closer to you. his gaze get through yours, and a storm appeared in it. "yes, i mean it y/n. you're getting on my nerves and i don't like that. maybe i don't like you too". wow. it was harsh. it was like getting stabbed again and again. he don't like you ? he really meant it ? now you were about to cry. tears filled your eyes, and you breathed harder to not let them run. and of course lando noticed it. "what, really ? are you going to cry ? you're the one who started it all and you think you can cry ? gosh you're so pathetic y/n". you shook your head and looked away because you knew soon your tears will drop. was he saying bullshit now ? "oh, you're really crying" he made fun of you and your statement. but you couldn't stand here and just cry. you had to speak up, to explain how you felt and explain that letting out his anger on you was not the solution. "please lando stop. i know it's because of racing that you're acting like that. you can be upset and annoyed but it can't justify the fact you burst your emotions on me. i did nothing wrong, i just want to help yo-" "it's not about racing !!!!" he yelled at you.
you almost jumped because of how much he scared you. he never yelled at you. never ever. he was so different from the lando you knew. lando was the perfect, caring, kindness boyfriend. who was so in love with you. not someone who yell and hurt you. "you can't even see it's you the problem. i don't need your shitty cuddles and hugs and everything. i never wanted you and i don't even need you. you sucks". "lando pleas-" "i wish i had never met you". and then he passed you to crawl on the couch, turning on the tv. he looked like he didn't even care about you anymore. your heart cried as your being hurt. the best thing that have ever came into your life just said he wish he had never met you. how hurtful it is. and you thought it was the race who made him angry like that, but it seemed like it's not the reason anymore. just him speaking maybe the truth and what he thinks about you. and you wished you were dreaming. but no, it was not.
you never had an argument with him. or when something was wrong, you would always talk about it. but it was so different. the person you loved the most broke you. pain, yeah, pain filled your body. it ached badly. you just wanted to leave. run far far away. so he couldn't hurt you anymore. "i'm leaving. i can't stay with you anymore so i'll go" "then go. get out of my apartment. i would be better off without you". it was one sentence too many. your tears ran down your cheeks, your face. you couldn't stop them. so you just leave, shutting the door behind you, as the one who broke you started to realize little by little what happened. and it was when guilt started to kick him.
-
"so fucking dumb you are" max says again, cursing at his friend's behavior towards you. "i know. don't remind me. i'm such an idiot" lando says again, cursing at himself. he is laying on his bed, re-watching your new instagram stories while max is sitting on the other side of the bed. "and for the fucking 40th time please stop looking at her stories. you've been doing this since this morning." max states, and try to grab his friend's phone who dodge it effortlessly. f1 driver reflexes yes. "then you stop sitting on this side of the bed. y/n's perfume will disappear because of you and your stinky scent". max rolls his eyes and finally stand up. "you're miserable".
lando sighs, and throws his phone over the blankets. "max help me... i'm so fucking lost without her." "but it's your own fault. you're the one to blame at". he shrugs and shake his head. "i know it's my fault max. don't you know i'm literally dying every single day because of how much i miss her ? that i'm crying because i will never find someone like her ? i'm in a shitty situation and i don't feel well because she's not with me. look, i'm in a pitiful state even though we did not even broken. what will i be like if we break up for real ? i don't even want to imagine it because i already know it will be awful." he passes his hand in his hair, ruffling them. "i've never felt like that about any exes, anyone. it's the first time i suffer like this, i don't know what to do...". max looks at his friend and his gaze softens. he hates seeing his best friend suffer, he can't stand it. "lando i can help you. and i will help you. but you have to promise me that you-" "SHE TEXTED ME !!!" lando suddenly screams.
"what ??" max jumps on the bed and sit next to him. "MAX !! SHE SENT ME A MESSAGE" lando is going crazy, he is just shocked. he don't even realizes what happens, he thinks he's dreaming. his heart is beating faster now. but max sighs as he reads the text you just sent, a simple "i'm coming to pick up some things in the evening". it is more a negative message because it means you're not staying in your boyfriend's apartment, but still lando is relieved by this one text. "lando, she's not staying. she's coming to pick up things because she don't want to live with you" "but it's her first text since 3 weeks ago ! she thinks about me too!"
max shakes his head and closes his eyes because he's getting a headache. "mate you don't get it" he says. but his friend don't listen, he is too focused on his phone. because he knows he's going to see her girlfriend soon, and he knows it will be the moment to apologize, to show her how much he cares about her. "max, help me. give me advices please. i'm listening". and then the two would spend the whole afternoon together, the streamer giving advices to the driver. lando is prepared, he don't want to loose his chance.
and then someone knocks on the door. he knows it is you because it's now around 6pm. max left 30 minutes ago. so it means you two will be alone together. lando almost tumbles because he ran towards the door at the speed of his mclaren livery. he takes a breath and opens the door.
oh.
your pretty face. the first thing he saw. his heart squeezes at the sight of you. your eyes, scanning his face and his body while he does the same for you. he can't believes you're standing in from of him, even though he saw you last week on sunday. but he's feeling worried now. you look super tired. dark circles under your tired eyes, your cheekbones more visible. you are as terrible as him. nobody dare to talk, and you start to feel awkward. "can i enter or maybe i just stay here until tomorrow ?" you say. "o-oh yes, come..." he shifts and you walk inside the apartment. and a weird feeling seizes you. every rooms of the apartment holds a memory from you and your boyfriend. the kitchen where he would cooks your breakfast, the living room where you would play karaokes. you feel nostalgic. and remember these memories makes you want to stay, to forgive lando, to be back together like before. but you put yourself together and fight this urge. you came for your things, not for him. or maybe it was also your intention. "how are you ?" he asks cautiously. "good. what about you ?" you reply. "good too". no, lies. from both of you.
you make your way to the bedroom. the first thing you see is your pillow above lando's one, as is he was sleeping on it. and the fact is that he was truly sleeping on it, your scent lulled him every nights. you put your suitcase on the bed and open it, you don't want to waste time. but there is a problem. and it's a big one. you have to sleep with lando tonight. not maybe in the same bed, but still you have to pass the night in his, well your shared apartment. those past 3 weeks, you were hosting at one of your friend's house. when lando asked you to moved in with him, you sold your old apartment. that's why you had nowhere to go, and lando was so worried about it but you weren't aware of it of course.
but your friend's parents were passing through and decided to pay a visit to your friend's house. you didn't want to intrude, so instead of worrying your friend you said you will buy an hotel room. what a coincidence you are now in your boyfriend apartment, sweating because you are scared to ask him to stay. so waiting for the fateful moment, you keep packing up things. you can also feel lando staring at you and his intense look burns your cheeks. "do you need anything ? you want something to eat ?" he asks sudenly, and you can hear he's caring about you by his tone. "no i'm okay, thank you" you simply answer.
your heart start pounding faster, and you sweat even more. god why were you so shy and scared ? he is your boyfriend after all, why would he refuse ? you play nervously with your necklace, the one lando gave you for your first date. you never took it off since now. "are you... okay ?" your boyfriend gives you a concerned look, he noticed you stopped packing your clothes. you take a deep breath and move to face him. "hum... can i..." your words don't want to leave your mouth. "can i stay here ? does it bothers you if i sleep here tonight ? if so then it's okay i will fin-" "no stay please." he rushes back. you look at him surprised. "i-i mean it doesn't bother me at all. you can sleep here". you give him a small smile and a little thank you. he smiles back, but unlike you it is a big, happy smile. the exact smile you love seeing from him. "huh, you can sleep on the bed, i'll go with the couch". he adds and you just nod.
lando just keep staring at you. of course, it disturbs you because sometimes you are putting useless things in your suitcase. he takes advantage of it to admire you. your body's silhouette he loved hugging, your shiny and soft hair he loved styling, your presence and its hold on him. you truly are precious to him. he knows he can't live without you in his life, it's just impossible. he needs you. not tomorrow, not in the next few hours. no. he needs you now. right now. he just can't stand the fact you're right here and can't kiss him or push him on the bed to cuddle him. he approaches you, and gently grabs your hand. surprisingly, you don't remove it and he melts down in the touch. "y/n... please listen to me". you sigh longly and turn your face to cross his eyes. you are also tired of it. even if he hurts you so bad, you can't stay far away from him because you need him as he needs you. "i'm listening". he strokes the back of your hand and takes your chin in his fingers to lift up your head, forcing you to look at him.
"i'm so fucking sorry y/n. so so sorry. you have no idea how much i blame myself and i feel so guilty every day. i'm the worst boyfriend ever, i don't even deserve you. every single minutes i keep thinking about what i said that day and if i could i would go back in time. because i regret so much those hurtful and cruel words i said to you. and you have to believe me, i didn't meant not a single word. i can't stand the fact that i'm the one who hurt you when i said i would punch the person who would did it". you try to reply back but he's so into it now. "please let me finish. i love you. i'm so madly and deeply in love with you. if you ever ask me to bring down the stars and the moon for you i'll do it. i would do anything for you. i love you. i have never loved someone like that. even with my exes, i never felt like that before, i never wanted someone so bad than you. you're the only one for me. nobody can replace you y/n. you're the best thing that ever happened to me, and i'll never let anything and anyone taking you from me. i need you in my life and i want you in my life because i can't imagine it without you. when i said i would be better without you, i so fucking lay. it's completely the opposite, i'm nothing without you. i would do anything for you to forgive me. because you're the only one, and you'll always be the only one."
tears are now running down his cheeks. and yours too. gosh he just let everything out, he has never been so desperate over someone. you can't stand it anymore and hug him tightly. he melts down in your hug and squeezes you. oh he missed you so much. he hides his wet face in the crook of your neck and keeps crying like a baby. you rub his back slowly and place a soft kiss on his hair. "i love you too lando. i'm so in love with you and i also need you." you simply say, because you know he already knows you're infatuated with him. and you guys stayed like that for fifteen minutes, lando keeping his arms around you. he don't want to let you go. he's so afraid of it now. "let's go cuddle in the bed. or maybe you still hate it" you tease him gently. "no. please. cuddle me. be clingy and needy, i'm only asking for it. don't go away from me." you two crumble into the bed and put the blankets over your bodies. lando curls up against you, his grip tight on you that you can barely breathe. he hides once again his head in the crook of your neck and one of his hand slips under your shirt, stroking your back. you start playing with his curls, something he loves and craves very much.
"i love you so much my baby" he suddenly says. you smile and peck his side profile. "me too lan". he lift up his head and your looks cross. he can't help it and a silly smile takes place on his lips. and he leans in, kissing you softly, your warm lips against his. he missed kissing you, so he really struggles to pull back. "besides i was such a liar. i'm the most needy and clingy one." you laugh hard and kiss him once again. he returns back the kiss and traces his way to your neck, planting soft kisses on it. "no for real, i would literally die without your cuddles. and just without you actually". you giggle and, you spend the rest of the night together. showering together again, cooking together again, playing karaokes together again. and of course, he didn't slept on the couch. but in your warm embrace which he's sure he'll never leave.
2K notes · View notes
yourmidnightlover · 7 months
Text
the sun
pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader
summary: after the events of the snap, you find out news that's both heart wrenching and warming. what happens five years later when bucky's back?
warnings: death, mourning, pregnancy, childbirth, canon-typical violence (not much but just adding to cover all the bases), loosely based on end game and infinity war (as in ignore my mistakes lmaooo), if i failed to mention any warnings PLEASE LET ME KNOW!
wc: 2.6k
a/n: dude idk why i've had an urge to write such heart wrenching angst lately. i'm actually in a decent place rn. i tried to cut this fic down bc originally it was SOOOO long i felt like a lot of it was just filler and i feel like shorter fics of mine tend to do better... ANYWHO! this does have a happy/hopeful ending so no worries! also picturing this beefcake for this story is AGHHHHHHH!
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you never thought two lines on a stick could ever break your heart the way they did.
tears clouded your vision as you gripped the counter, trying not to crumble or succumb to your grief.
6 weeks ago, the avengers lost. everything.
half of the world, gone in a moment.
in one moment, your world collapsed. seeing bucky fade to dust right in front of you...
sobs wracked through your body as you crumbled to the ground.
this was supposed to be a happy moment. there should be tears of joy, not sobs of sorrow. your heart should feel full of love, not like there's a super-soldier sized hole in it.
"y/n," nat's voice rang outside the door, giving you a moment to yourself.
"just-," you tried to level your breathing before she opened the door, knowing but not understanding the grief you were feeling.
she wrapped her arms around your body, tucking your head into her neck as she gently rubbed your back soothingly. steve leaned against the bathroom door, glancing on the counter to see what they had all expected.
a positive pregnancy test.
you were having bucky's baby.
without bucky.
you gripped his dog tags that you had been wearing since the funeral. they were the only thing that could truly ground you.
they brought back happy memories of cuddling in bed, the cool metal shocking your skin for only a moment before realizing that it was only bucky and smiling at the memory.
god, it hadn't even been two months.
how were you supposed to do this alone?
"we're here for you," steve's voice called from the doorway, as if he could hear your thoughts. "you'll never be alone. not in this... not ever." he shook his head, his brows furrowed in a serious, straight line.
eventually, your sobs subsided. you stood with nat from your seat on the ground, wiping your own eyes mustering up a pathetic smile before she left you and steve to work out your grief together.
"we didn't even know it was possible," you shrugged. "it's like he sent me them..." you placed your hand on an invisible bump before facing steve, his teary eyes reminding you that he had lost his best friend, too. "he sent us this baby."
you reached your hand out for steve to hold. he took it gratefully and pulled you into his arms, hugging you tight and letting only a few tears slip his waterline before pulling back.
"if you'll let me, i want to be there for you for everything," his chin wobbled. "buck would kick my ass if i let you go through this alone." a genuine laugh left your lips for the first time in nearly two months.
"i would be so grateful for that," you nodded as you let go of his arms. "part of me still can't believe that it's real. it's like part of me still expects him to walk into the compound from a long mission or something..." you shook your head. "i know that sounds so stupid."
"it's not," he shook his head with a smile. "it's what i wish was true, maybe it's your subconscious trying to preserve your mind?"
"maybe," you shrugged before continuing, "i should probably talk to tony and bruce, huh?"
-
you knew you were around eight weeks along.
according to the doctors' tony had enlisted, however, you were already 12 weeks along, which was impossible.
bucky had been gone on a mission at that time... but it's whatever. you got to hear the heartbeat. steve went with you, too. you both bawled together. you kept three copies of the ultrasound and he kept two.
banner had already offered to do some testing on the dna of the baby, noting that the serum would likely affect the pregnancy (as it probably already has).
you had talked to tony about retiring from the whole superhero gig for the time being. you needed to mourn and prepare for a new life simultaneously. tony had promised to provide anything you needed at the drop of a hat, and he sure as hell delivered.
within no time, your pregnancy was being measured at 20 weeks while only being pregnant for 12. banner was concerned for your body's ability to keep up with the rapid rate of growth of the baby. he had you on a strict, hefty diet with two different prenatal vitamins in attempt to help your nutrition.
in spite of your best efforts, you were always exhausted and in pain. but you wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. this was bucky's baby. you didn't care how much pain you went through when you had half of him growing inside of you.
you couldn't walk for long without feeling like passing out, which banner chalked up to low iron. steve had grown progressively more worried for you and the baby the longer the pregnancy went on.
as a result, he had moved into the spare room that was in your and bucky's house. truly, it just made it easier for him to help you finish up the nursery anyway.
he was very handy about it all, painting, building furniture from scratch, the whole deal.
"i've been thinking... and if it's a girl, i want to name her evangeline james barnes," you informed steve as you ate the steak he had been making for the past few weeks of your pregnancy, as ordered by dr. banner. that with carrots, broccoli, potatoes, and for dessert strawberries, blueberries and raspberries over ice cream. "and if it's a boy, cyrus james barnes. evangeline means good news, and cyrus means sun."
steve placed his hand over yours, "i think buck would've loved them." he smiled warmly as you downed the food in a few minutes.
you had begun showing soon after you found out you were pregnant, but now, it felt like it was impossible to hide. nat had been wonderful about helping you keep up with the changes your body was going through, getting you new maternity clothes every week.
she even made sure to get you every single craving that wasn't in accordance to banner's hefty diet. not that he didn't want you to eat more, he thought it was best you did! but he also wanted to make sure that with all that you did eat, your body got as many nutrients as possible.
just to be safe, he kept you on other vitamin supplements anyway.
you couldn't help but imagine what bucky would say or do about everything now.
he would hold your body closely, pressing firm kisses to your bump every chance he could get while whispering some sickly sweet sayings to your unborn child, words that would melt the winter soldier's cold exterior.
he would whisper words of encouragement any moment you felt worried about your abilities to be a mom. he would say how beautiful you were, in spite of being bloated in places you didn't know could bloat.
he would be wonderful, and in your mind, he was still alive and vibrant. well, as vibrant as bucky ever was, at least.
truthfully, that's the only way you were able to keep going on like this. steve was wonderful, but you couldn't help but want the love of your life by your side as you tried to navigate this new chapter.
in a couple more weeks, you were projected to be at 32 weeks. bruce and tony were talking with your doctors about the safety of inducing so early, both for you and the baby.
oh, and you wanted the gender to be a surprise.
and within the week, you were having your baby.
steve and nat were by your side during the birth, whispering encouraging words and compliments of your strength.
"i need him!" you screamed in pain as you held one of each of their hands, sobbing in agony. "i need james! i need my bucky! i can't do this alone, i can't-i can't!"
"you can," nat reminded you. "this baby needs you," she held your face to look at hers. "bucky is a part of this baby." you swore you could see tears in her eyes before turning to face steve.
"remember what you told me when you found out you were pregnant?" he didn't bother wiping the tears from his face. "bucky sent you-sent us this baby. he knows you can do it." you sniffled before nodding at your two best friends, pushing with one last scream and a second later, you had...
"cyrus james barnes," the nurse called to you. "it's a boy, congratulations mom."
-
the next few years went by quicker than you could've ever imagined.
crawling, first words, first steps...
you missed bucky. not a day passed where you didn't miss him.
but, having cy helped a lot. he looked just like his father. dark brown hair, icy blue eyes, a cute little nose... not to mention his father's stubbornness.
you made sure he knew who his father was. you took him to the museum often, showing him the statue of his father and his background in the world war, him saving the world so much. you told him how you fell in love with him.
how you fell for the quiet man before ever really talking to him. how you were partners on a long-term, undercover mission and that's where your love ignited from the sparks.
not that cy understood any of what you told him. you just felt it was important to know that his parents loved him, and each other dearly.
you never took off his dog tags, either.
steve was a huge help the whole time. he kept working for the avengers, so he was gone often, but he provided a good male role model for cyrus. after all, he was his uncle steve. he already taught him how to throw a ball, albeit a little softball, but it counts!
you made sure to document everything that went on in yours and cyrus's life.
banner had said that cyrus was growing at an exceeding rate, but nothing to be concerned about. in fact, cyrus was turning five in almost half a year, meaning the anniversary of bucky's death, or disappearance or whatever you called it, was coming up.
then, you got a call from tony and banner.
it all happened so quickly, from testing to planning to the execution. pepper watched cyrus for you while you went back with steve, scott, and tony to get the tesseract.
of course, the men being men had to come upon a few hiccups, but eventually, after going as far back as the 70s, you brought back the tesseract.
the only thing is that nat never came back...
next thing you know, bruce is snapping his fingers and clint is getting a call from his supposedly deceased wife. your eyes fill with tears, hands searching in your pockets for your phone to see if you've gotten anything yet.
is it possible he wasn't brought back? he was the first to... disintegrate. die. maybe that meant something in the eyes of the stones?
then, you felt a buzz in your hand.
although, you didn't have any time to try to grasp what that meant, because more aliens came to earth.
shocker.
after yet another war, one that you weren't even prepared for, after losing more people, again. after losing tony...
but amidst the chaos of the aftermath of the fight, with screams of joy and shock and grief surrounding you, tears streaming down your face, your eyes met the blue ones you only saw in your son.
he slowly walked towards you as the tears sped up. you didn't even realize when your feet began running towards him.
when his arms wrapped around your waist, you finally felt the home you thought you had come to terms with never feeling again. your arms wrapped around his neck, your face buried in his shoulder as you breathed in the scent of gunmetal that had overtaken him in the battle.
"oh my god," you cried into the leather of his jacket. he lifted you off the ground, your legs wrapping around his waist as you felt his smile on your cheek. "i can't believe you're really here."
"i'm here, doll," his hands cradled your head so tenderly. "i'm not ever leaving again. never."
you pulled back before your eyes widened in realization. "you've gotta meet someone, jamie."
his brows furrowed in confusion, just smiling and nodding along with whatever you said.
within the next few hours, simply being held by bucky before steve stole him away with a hug, you finally brought him home.
"so, steve moved in," you started as you pulled your car into the driveway, turning to see bucky looking at you with an incredulous look. "you'll see why." you reached to hold his hand before he brought yours to his lips, pressing a kiss there.
you told him to wait in the car as you went inside to relieve the babysitter for cyrus. after giving him some cash, he went outside, knocking on your car window to let bucky know he should make his way inside.
upon entering, he saw you sitting on the floor with a little boy with striking blue eyes that seemed so familiar to him. his nose, too. his lips though, they were all yours. he had a slight grin plastered on his lips, one that matched yours to a t.
"daddy?" suddenly, it all clicked.
his heart, his mind, his fucking soul, everything made sense now. the pain, hydra, the mind washing, the torture.
meeting you. falling in love. dying?
his son.
he started walking closer to bucky before the steady walk turned into a run. bucky knelt down, wrapping the boy in his arms, cradling his tiny frame in his arms protectively. his son.
"cyrus james barnes," you said with a teary smile on your face. bucky, without breaking the hug with his son, looked up at you with a smile that matched yours. "cyrus means 'sun', and i thought it was fitting. he brought me so much light and hope after you..." you choked up before he stood up with cy in his arms, walking towards you before wrapping you in the big, family hug.
"i love you so much, both of you."
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vanteguccir · 8 months
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── ୨୧ ! 𝗧𝗥𝗨𝗧𝗛 𝗢𝗥 𝗘𝗔𝗧
         𝒄𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader
SUMMARY: Where Y/N participates in the TRUTH OR EAT video from behind the camera.
WARNING: None.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
"What's the most romantic thing you've ever done?" Matt asked, taking his eyes off the open black notebook in front of him and focusing them on Chris, his hands playing with the green highlighter.
Chris let out a breathy laugh, looking beyond the camera, his blue eyes meeting Y/N's, who smiled, raising her eyebrows, awaiting her boyfriend's response.
"I think there are two most romantic things I've ever done, both obviously with Y/N, since she's the only girlfriend I've ever had. I know you only asked for one, but I can think of two with different spheres." Chris began, looking at Matt momentarily, who nodded.
"Hurry up Chris." Nick ordered with a smile on his face as he took Matt's notebook, already anticipating his brother's response. Being Y/N's best friend, he had inside information.
"The first was last year, when Y/N and I completed three years of dating and I gifted her a trip for both of us to Italy." Chris smiled big, his eyes shining as he counted while Nick and Matt looked at him with matching smiles, happy for their brother's happiness. "She always dreamed of visiting Italy, it being her favorite place in the world, and when the three years together came I thought this was the ideal way to celebrate. I really wanted to see her happy and achieving her dream."
"I remember that, it was the longest the three of us were apart from each other because you were there for seven days." Matt commented, nodding his head.
"Yes, I remember Chris planning the entire trip. We went to that travel agency with him and helped him choose the perfect package with the best hotel and best tours. It was like a honeymoon without a wedding." Nick continued Matt's reasoning.
"I was so nervous when I went to give her the envelope with the plane tickets, I don't know why, but I thought everything was going to go wrong." Chris said, rolling his eyes when Nick and Matt started laughing, commenting that they remembered all the times he asked if it was good enough or if they thought Y/N would like it.
The girl smiled big behind the camera, her eyes lit up with happiness as memories of the trip flashed through her mind.
"So I think that's one of the most romantic things I've done for her, and the other one I didn't even realize was that romantic until Y/N pointed it out to me." Chris began, gesturing with his hands, organizing the mess of tacos in front of him. "She has a horrible habit of tying only one bow on her sneaker, which makes the shoelaces come untied more easily. Whenever we're walking together, I'm the one who notices the untied sneaker first, so I always stop her, kneel down in just one knee, take her foot with the untied sneaker and place it on top of my other knee, and tie the shoelace for her-"
Chris stopped in his speech when he saw Nick and Matt making exaggerated expressions of surprise and "dying in love", laughing together, making him roll his eyes and look at his girlfriend in disbelief, who laughed quietly, sending him a wink, causing a blush to grow on his cheeks.
"May I continue?" The middle brother asked loudly, looking at Nick and Matt with a bored expression.
"Sorry." The two said in unison, wiping their eyes from the tears from their exaggerated laughter.
"And also when Y/N wears high heels on certain occasions, whenever we go out of the house together I don't let her buckle her heels, I kneel down on one knee and buckle them for her. This is kind of an act of service but that she finds super romantic, and I realized that it really is when I saw that no couple around us do it. There are many more romantic things that I have done for her, but if I were to say everything the video would last more than an hour. " Chris finished, smiling broadly and holding up a tumb to the camera, blowing an air kiss to his girlfriend, who pretended to take it with one hand and put it in her pocket.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
"Okay, next question, how long have you gone without showering?" Nick asked, glancing briefly at the question in the notebook before closing it with the highlighter in the middle, focusing his attention on Chris.
"Since almost four years ago I've been showering every day, Y/N rules!" Chris began, raising his arms in surrender. Nick let out a laugh as he looked at Y/N and saw her nodding quickly with her arms crossed.
Matt quickly looked at the girl when he saw Nick looking at her, laughing at her expression.
"Before I met my beautiful, perfect girlfriend, it was a weekend." Chris said, laughing as he mentioned his girlfriend in a joking tone.
"No, it was more than that. I know how long it was, let me answer." Matt jumped in, taking a sip of his soda when Nick told him to shut up, the sound of a low chuckle echoing faintly through the kitchen as Y/N tried to stop herself from laughing, watching the brothers bickering.
"I've already gone without showering from a Friday night until a Monday morning." Chris concluded, Nick muttering that he had already done the same. "Like, four days." He added.
"That example is less than four days, Chris." Nick commented while laughing, Matt following him.
"I'm a changed man, I don't do those things anymore." Chris said, crossing his arms and lifting his chin with a snobbish expression, increasing Nick and Matt's laughter.
"You men are so disgusting." Y/N whispered only for the three to hear, rolling her eyes.
Matt looked at her with an offended expression.
"Yeah guys, if I go a day without showering I'll sleep on the couch." Chris said looking at the camera as he opened the package of the next taco, putting an end to that discussion.
Nick passed the notebook back to Matt, starting the timer again so that Chris could go back to eating while Matt searched for the perfect question.
"The time is over!" The redhead announced, looking briefly at his phone screen while Matt closed the notebook, already with his question in mind.
"Okay, give me the inside scoop of the perfect Chris Sturniolo date night looks like?"
"What is this, Y/N who created my questions?" Chris asked after finishing chewing, letting out a laugh through his nose, his blue eyes looking briefly at his girlfriend only to see her with her arms raised in surrender as if she didn't know anything.
"Just answer the question Chris." Nick pressed, turning to face him.
"Can I give an example of a date I had with Y/N ​​and we always do it again because it was really good for us?" Chris asked, arranging the napkin on the table as he glanced briefly at his brothers, who nodded. "Okay, I guess first I have to establish here that for me, when it's a date, it's literally a whole date day. On my first date with Y/N, I picked her up with an Uber in the morning with a bouquet of flowers since I don't know how to drive and I didn't want to bother Matt, and we had brunch at a cafe attached to a bookstore, because when we were getting to know each other she said that she really liked reading books and drinking coffee. Boys, understand one fundamental thing, listen to everything your girl likes and has to say, it will help you a lot and contribute to your relationship." The boy said, pointing to the camera as he said the last part.
Y/N felt her body heat up with shyness and love as she remembered that day, holding herself back from going to Chris to hug him tightly and shower his face with kisses.
"Afterwards we went for a walk around the city while we talked and I took her to a place where they only have those teddy bear catching machines, you know?" He looked at his brothers receiving nods. "And we stayed there for a while, where I got her a teddy bear, she still sleeps with it to this day."
Chris informed the last part in a whisper as if it was a secret, ignoring his girlfriend who rolled her eyes exaggeratedly.
"Afterwards, as we were still satisfied from brunch, I took her to an amusement park close to where we were and we stayed there for hours, we even had dinner there at one of the hot dog stands, I remember I bought her some cotton candy later and I will never forget her happiness because of it." He counted with shining eyes, rolling his eyes at his brothers who made gestures of vomiting. "And finally, I took her to a park that had a lake with ducklings and we walked around there and fed them for a few hours, that's where we also had our first kiss." Nick and Matt made air-kissing gestures, making fun of Chris, who pushed their faces with his hands. "That was my perfect date."
The boy finished, smiling big and taking the taco in his hand, ready to finish eating and start to ask Nick questions.
"You two are so disgusting." Matt said in a joking tone, passing the notebook to Nick, knowing that Chris would sit there.
Y/N smiled behind the camera, her cheeks already hurting from how much she was doing it, her heart warming up while hearing Chris talk about them with so much love, feeling like she could fall in love with him all over again.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
extra - comments:
"omg Chris seems like a really great boyfriend!!"
"they are so pretty together."
"one day I want to have a partner who cares about me as much as Chris cares about Y/N."
"the fact that he took her TO ITALY just because he wanted to see her happy 😭"
"Chris, the last romantic man on earth."
"the way he talks about her 😫"
"get married already."
"petition for Y/N and Chris to make a video talking about all his romantic acts ✏️📄"
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pickingupmymercedes · 6 months
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The things we do for fashion - Lewis Hamilton (NSFW)
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request: "Hey, drop something happy and sexy to get over this terrible weekend with Lewis in merc with that terrible strategy and that bad tire performance, burn that car pls. Thank you" - anon
pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!
warnings: unprotected sexual activities, penetrative sex (p in v), creampie.
Also, wrap it before you tap it
wordcount: +1K
a/n: Cutesy and fun smut, little to no plot, as all my smuts tend to be. Also, been gone (with food poisoning) but this request had to be written.
As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!
EXPLICIT CONTENT UNDER, -18 DO NOT INTERACT.
______________________________________________________________
You started it without any intention for it to end like it did. An innocent clean-up of his spare closet was all it was meant to be. But, living with Lewis was seldom your typical experience, and things with him had a knack for turning into something else entirely within a matter of minutes.
You had the day off and your self-appointed task of the day was relatively simple: get Lewis's paddock outfits out of the boxes Eric had shipped them in and organize them on the racks so Lewis could see the full fit. It should have taken you less than two hours, ample time to spare until Lewis returned from the factory. At least, that's what you thought.
In the middle of the room, you sat surrounded by half-open boxes and only a few racks filled when you heard Lewis call out from the entrance of his London home.
"Hey, love! How's it going in here?"
You scrambled to your feet, pushing aside the box you were sorting through and greeted him with a sheepish smile. "Uh, not quite as planned, to be honest."
Lewis chuckled as he walked over to you, glancing at the mess of boxes and clothes. "Mind if I have a look at what you've got so far?"
"Go ahead, just…it's not finished yet." you said, a little embarrassed.
Lewis began to sift through the clothes, his eyes lighting up with excitement as he pulled out some of the pieces he recalled were his favorites.
"Oh, I've been looking forward this one!" he exclaimed, holding up a vibrant red jacket. "And these trousers! I can't wait to wear this combo."
He continued to go through the clothes, commenting on each piece he was excited to wear. The excitement in his voice infectious, getting you to instantly smile at his enthusiasm.
As he reached the bottom of one of the boxes, his hand paused on a piece of clothing. A black sleeveless turtleneck, skin-tight and oh so sleek.
"Oh, I love this one," you whispered, unable to hide your admiration.
A subtle shift occurred in Lewis's expression. His eyes meeting yours, a hint of intrigue and desire in them.
"You really think so?" his voice already lower, almost to a husky whisper.
"Yeah," you admitted, feeling a rush of heat spread through you. "They accentuate your biceps really well."
A wicked grin spread across Lewis's face, and he took a step closer, the atmosphere in the room growing more intense. "Is that so?" his murmur mimicking his eyes darkening with desire. "Maybe you'd like to see just how well it accentuates them?"
Your breath caught in your throat as Lewis took his sweats off and then slowly pulled the turtleneck over his head, revealing the defined muscles of his biceps. The fabric clung to him perfectly, emphasizing every contour and curve.
"Like what you see?" he teased, his voice low and seductive.
You swallowed hard, unable to tear your eyes away from him. "More than you'll ever know."
With a playful smirk, Lewis leaned in, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss, the intensity of the moment leaving no doubt that this innocent closet clean-up had taken a decidedly spicy turn.
His hands found their way to your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss deepened, the heat between you palpable. You responded eagerly, your hands roaming over his toned chest and back, reveling in the feel of his muscles beneath your touch.
Lewis's hands trailed up your spine, sending shivers down your back, and he broke the kiss to pepper soft, lingering kisses along your jawline and neck. His breath was warm against your skin, his touch sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.
"God, you drive me crazy," his murmurs against your skin, voice husky with desire.
You gasped as he lifted you effortlessly, carrying you over to the nearby sofa and gently laying you down. He hovered over you, his eyes dark with passion, and you reached up to pull him down for another searing kiss.
The world seemed to fade away as you lost yourself in the sensation of his lips on yours, his hands exploring your body with a gentleness that belied the intensity of his desire. Time seemed to stand still as you explored each other, the connection between you deepening with every touch, every caress.
Eventually, you both came up for air, breathless and flushed with desire. Lewis's eyes searched yours, filled with a mixture of love, lust, and something deeper, something more profound.
"I love you," he whispered, his voice filled with emotion.
"I love you too," you replied, your heart swelling with love and contentment.
With a simple exchange, the atmosphere in the room shifted once again, the intense passion giving way to a more tender, intimate connection. You held yourself up by his shoulders, drawing your body close to his, feeling his growing arousal through the fabric of his briefs. Between lingering kisses, his hand found its way to your core, teasing your clit through the fabric of your panties and shorts. Your moans filled the room, mingling with his as his lips stubbornly refused to leave your own.
Growing impatient with the teasing, you took hold of his wrists, his eyes opening wide with a mix of surprise and concern. "Lew, no teasing, please," you murmured in a ragged voice, locking eyes with him. His smirk formed slowly, mischief dancing in his eyes. "You don’t get to start this and not see it through, baby girl," he whispered, his voice incredibly low as he breathed in your scent. His arms wrapped around your legs and waist, effortlessly laying you down once again.
His fingers skillfully undid the silk ribbon of your shorts, slowing down each movement as his eyes met yours, his kisses trailing lower on your body. "When you see me wearing this turtleneck, I want you to remember me eating you up in it," he whispered against your skin.
Reaching your core, he caressed you for a moment before pulling the cotton fabric to the side, blowing gently on your sensitive skin before kissing you, causing your body to quiver in anticipation. Soon, his tongue was exploring every inch of you, his thumb on your clit and two fingers teasing your entrance.
"We need to get you ready, huh?" he said, not waiting for your response before curling his fingers inside you, the angle and traction causing you to writhe in pleasure, reaching your first climax, completely captivated by his touch.
Stepping away from the sofa to remove his sweatpants and boxers, you mustered the energy and courage to sit up and grab his arms before he could take the turtleneck off. "You, sir, you stay just like that while I engrave into my memory how ridiculously hot you look," you said with a playful smirk.
Kneeling in front of him, you took his member in one hand, the other tracing his abdomen beneath the fabric. The sensation of his growing body hair, his precum leaking from the tip, and the low whimpers from the man – who you literally had in your hands – left you feeling overwhelmingly elated.
His hands on the back of your head guided the rhythm as you took him into your mouth, the head of his dick reaching further with each thrust, synchronizing perfectly with your movements. If it weren’t for his hands on your cheeks and the fiery intensity in his eyes, you could have continued for hours.
The raw passion and connection between you two made every touch, every kiss, and every glance get you two more connected than the last. So, when he reached for your arms, he didn’t need to say he was more than ready to take you, fully. His hands on your waist guided you to one of the arms of the sofa, steadying you with one hand while the other spread your leg to get better access.
His first stroke was always the slowest; this time, though, it felt like torture. His eyes closed as he reached deeper and deeper, moans leaving his mouth and yours as you both adjusted to each other, his body coming closer to yours as he embraced you, his lips connecting to yours almost mindlessly. "Babe, I swear… it never gets easier holding myself back."
His thrusts got harder and faster as he continued, your moans turning into gasps the closer you got to another orgasm, his dick ever so slightly brushing that spot that got you whimpering, just for him to smirk down at you and change the angle. He wanted to build the pressure so he could choose when to release it; he was in control, and he knew how to show it.
Just after your eyes started welling up from the overstimulation, he pulled both of your legs behind his neck, making sure he reached your cervix and g-spot each time. His dick throbbing and his thrusts deepened as he let out a guttural groan, his seeds filling you as you saw white, his pubic bone hitting your clit just right one last time.
The room was filled with heavy breaths and a lingering warmth as you both came down from your high. Lewis’s expression soft and his eyes filled with tenderness and care as he looked at you "You okay?" his question gentle, brushing a strand of hair from your face.
You nodded, feeling a little overwhelmed but safe in his arms. "Yeah, just a bit worn out, I guess." Lewis smiled warmly, pulling you closer to him. "Let me take care of you," he murmured, as he carefully helped you sit up and stood to grab a towel from the nearby bathroom.
Returning to your side, he dampened the towel with warm water and began to gently clean you up, taking care not to cause any discomfort. Once he was satisfied that you were comfortable, Lewis took off the turtleneck he had been wearing, putting it aside to be washed before sitting back down beside you on the small sofa.
He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest, offering you comfort and warmth. You snuggled into his embrace, feeling the steady beat of his heart against your ear. The intensity of the moment had passed, replaced by a comforting sense of closeness and affection.
"The room's a bit of a state, isn't it?" Lewis remarked after a while, bringing you back from the haze you found yourself in, glancing around at the mess of clothes and scattered belongings. "Looks like we've got our work cut out for us." You chuckled, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, I guess we do. But I wouldn't want to clean up this mess with anyone else."
"The things we do for fashion..." Lewis quipped with a playful smirk. You couldn't help but laugh at his remark, the tension in the room dissipating as you both shared a moment of lightheartedness, wrapped in each other's arms.
______________________________________________________________
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mintmatcha · 20 days
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Inevitable Things : chapter nine
aizawa x reader fic
cw: aizawa x reader, cisfem reader, office AU, no quirks. Mentions of drug use
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Toshinori sends you a text just as you’re walking back from your room.
-> Slways a sad friday without your reports. Hope things are good. THank you for keeping my company moving and for keeping the peace this weekend.
He ends the message with a little flexed bicep emoji-- his little sign for ‘keep fighting’.
A pang of something clangs around in your ribcage. You miss him too. Usually, it’d be strange to consider yourself close with a boss, but Toshinori is different; he’s kind, he’s earnest, he treats you well. His riches are used to improve the world, not line his own pocket-
There’s also a sour feeling that hits your gut. Your position on this trip is borrowed; Toshinori should be here, representing his company, just like he had every other year. You’re only here because he likes you- not because of merit or knowledge. 
That only deepens your dread. No, you aren’t special or smart. You’re just a pity case, here because your boss is dying. And isn’t it selfish to pity yourself? Toshinori is the sick one.
By the time the elevator chimes open, you’re consumed by dread. You slide past the doors and next to the man in there, head tucked down to watch your shoes. They aren’t your silly red ones, but a brand new sensible black kitten heel-- a child’s choice in shoes.
“No hello?” The stranger says. “Thought we had a truce.”
You briefly look at the man, who’s turning your way, and then dip away, embarrassed; the man is cute, well put together, someone who you wouldn’t mind talking to-
-you realize he isn’t a stranger at all. 
It’s a simple black suit, pressed a bit unevenly in the legs, but well fitted across his waist. Aizawa is wearing a dark emerald shirt with no tie, unbuttoned at the top. Even his hair is tidy and hydrated; it’s still wet from the shower, pulled into a tight low ponytail. For the first time maybe ever, he’s clean shaven as well, a little nick on his cheek from the kiss of razor, right under his silvered scar.
He looks good. 
Like. Really good.
It’s a surprise and it also isn’t-- seems like you’re always lured in by a surprise Shouta sighting.
“I didn’t realize it was you in this… get up.” You shift your weight away from him. Does he even have cologne on? It’s not like you expected him to give a speech in his sweatshirt--- well, maybe you did. “I was-- I dunno. Thinking.”
He nods like he knows what that really means.
“Don’t do that.”
“I’m not allowed to think?” you repeat.  “Aren’t you supposed to be nice to me?”
He shoots you a glare. “You didn’t even say hello to me-- that isn’t nice either. I figured our treaty was off.”
Ugh. He may have a point. Pretending is going to involve, well, actually pretending. You look him up and down, slapping on your fakest smile. “I’m so happy to see you.” 
Aizawa grimaces as if you’ve slapped him, fingers pressed into his temple like you’ve caused the onset of a migraine. It takes him a moment to mumble out: “The feeling is mutual.”
���At least say it like you mean it,” you demand.
“The fact you are here is just the best.” he says, more enthusiastic than you’ve ever seen the man, but also clearly fake; his lips curls up to the left when he’s lying. He rubs little circles into his skin to help him through the pain of being a decent person. “I’m so grateful you get to watch me present and then report how I did back to my boss.”
Despite yourself, you smile, just a bit.
“That’ll do.”
“For you.” Aizawa repeats it. That's right: he's doing this for your comfort, not his own. That thought wriggles inside you and buries down like a worm.
“Do we need ground rules?” you ask. The elevator dings down, down, down-
“A weekend treaty was my idea, I don’t need stipulations,” Aizawa says, ruffling his hair. It smells like product, something expensive than Hizashi definitely forced upon him.  “I can be civil without rules.”
“Then why are you never civil?” you shoot back, talking before you can think. The doors flick open and Aizawa walks out, giving you a bemused, yet annoying look.
“That’s a very pointed question,” he says over his shoulder. “You might be the one who needs ground rules.”
“Hey!”
--
Mic’s in the hall already when you two arrive. The place would be simply cavernous if it wasn’t filled to the gills with booths. The ceiling glimmers with chandeliers and the classic blue tiling, but the rest of the room is pretty standard-- almost underwhelming. The booth Hizashi’s set up is mild compared to the one’s surrounding it, which makes sense, you guess. It’s not like he could have wheeled a hospital bed into this hotel; just diagrams, brochures, and enough swag to lure even the least interested prospect into his arms. He’s unwrapping a lollipop when he notices you two approaching.
“Wow, wow-” He sizes you up with the candy. The bright red end shines in the light. Someone snags a piece of candy off of the table as they pass; despite the fact the hall isn’t officially open, there’s still a fair amount of people roaming. “Looking good, baby.”
“Which one of us are you talking to?” It takes you a second to realize Aizawa’s kidding.
“You, obviously-” Hizashi says back to him. They both chuckle and it’s horrifying how they do it in the same way: low, rolling, completely un-serious. They really have known each other forever.
“Oh, before I forget-” The blonde spreads out a sticker and a proper name placard. “I grabbed name tags.”
Yours in handwritten in surprisingly nice writing, but Aizawa's is laminated and on a lanyard, his name and degree written in red bold lettering-
“I didn’t know you were a doctor,” you blurt out as he puts it on. Aizawa shifts his weight to his other leg uncomfortably. “Should I be calling you Dr. Aizawa?”
“No.” he dismisses.  “It’s not medical-- It’s a PhD.”
“In Biomedical Engineering, so medical’s in the name, actually-”
Aizawa shoots Hizashi a glare. “You know what I mean. I’m not saving someone from a heart attack. All I do is sit on this damn computer and look at programs and numbers.” Aizawa takes a chair from the neighboring booth- a biotissue company- and drags it to behind the table before flopping down. 
  “You should look around, see what everyone's up to. If you just sit here with us you're just going to stress over your talk.” Hizashi waves him off. “Besides, me and babygirl have it handled.”
Aizawa hunches over in his seat as he drags out his laptop and a pen.
“I want to stress over my talk.”  He taps the capped end of his pen against his teeth, the click audible over the din of the growing crowd. “I want to sit here and be miserable.” 
Hizashi looks at you and waggles his finger beside his head in the ‘this guy’s crazy’ way. Yeah- obviously. You have to hide your giggle as someone walks up to your table and Hizashi launches into his spiel. It’s hard not to watch Aizawa out of the corner of your eye; he is, in fact, sitting down and stressing out. The man has pulled out a tiny laptop and balanced it on his lap, alternating between furiously typing and mashing the back button.
“You okay if he’s here?” Hizashi whispers. Honestly, you’re not thrilled; you had been hoping for a lighthearted day alone with your buddy--
But maybe it can still be a little fun.
“Oh, absolutely,” you say too loudly. “Aizawa and I are buddies.”
You're abusing his kindness for you by pushing him, you know that, but doesn't he deserve it? Just a bit? Aizawa sneers a smile from behind his screen, clearing unamused. 
“Best ‘buddies,’” he says, flat enough you could drive across it. 
Hizashi looks between you. Then, he does it again. 
 “Since when?”
----
The rest of the afternoon continues the same way. Swathes of doctors and investors visit you, half of which ask about Yagi. You tell them all that he’s a fighter. Most understand this means he’s doing poorly. Luckily, Hizashi handles most of the harder questions; it’s amazing to see him in his zone, smooth talking and pitching and just talking so quickly and professionally that you’re almost ready to buy a Prome product yourself. No wonder people have tried to poach him from the company. The customers Prome already has sing his praises and tell you about all the wonderful extra steps he’s taken for them.
You aren’t sure you’re truly nice enough to be a sales rep too.
Aizawa only greets a few people, seemingly ones he knows well or that are well known enough to give his full attention. The worried look never leaves his face, except when you chirp little niceties at each other. 
There’s comfort to it, you find. It’s better than the hot and cold thing you had going on. That bubbling, seasick anger inside of you can be funneled into thinly veiled sarcasm without consequence, with the added benefit of Aizawa seeming to enjoy it as well. 
“Great shirt by the way,” a passerby says. Aizawa looks up, eyes wide and mouth agape enough for a fly to fly into.
“Were they talking to me?”
They actually were, but you can’t let him know that.
“Of course, buddy,” you coo. “It’s a great shirt- did you put this outfit together?”
He gives you a sideways glance as he continues typing away without seeing the keyboard. “I’m forty-- who do you think picks out my clothes? My mother?”
You think he’s actually joking in good faith this time.
“Sesame, maybe.”
He is being silly. He’s even smiling now, a weird thing with too much teeth. “Yes. You’re right. My cats picked out my suit. How silly of me to not credit her for her work.” His tone is horribly flat, but there’s still some charm to it; honestly, with the way he’s carrying on, you wouldn’t be surprised if he really did trust a cat with his clothing.
“Well, tell Sesame that I think you look great.” 
“Thank you.” He adjusts his cuffs, running his fingers down the cotton edge of his shirt. 
“You two are so weird today,” the blonde whines.  “But you aren’t killing each other, so-”
Hizashi sucks in a breath through his teeth.
“Keep this up and I’ll buy dinner and drinks tonight-- Fuck, keep this up and I’ll plan your fucking wed-”
“Long time no see, gentlemen.” 
A man, probably not much older than you, comes up to the table. He's seated in a wheelchair, rocking the wheels slightly back and forth. The stranger is exceptionally handsome:  all wide smiles and broad shoulders, his black hair perfectly quaffed back and parted. The downturn of his eyes is dark and pleasant, and it takes your breath away when you realize he's looking at you and only you. 
“I don't think we've met before.” He shakes his head a little as he speaks, back and forth in this delighted disbelief, as if he can't understand why he has never seen you.  “I'm Tensei Iida.”
The name rings a bell, but you can’t quite place it. 
“He's one of the super sexy doctors I was telling you about.” Hizashi says as he nudges you with his hip.  Tensei rolls his eyes in a way that tells you he's actually tickled pink. That’s it-- he’s Aizawa’s presentation partner.
“Oh, stop that,” he says. “Don't listen to Mic- I’m just a normal guy.”
“Nice to meet you, Dr. Iida.” You take his hand. His grip is firm and dry, and he parts from you with a squeeze. “You work in prosthetics, right?”
“I do.” He flicks his hair out of his eyes like a teenaged dreamboat. What is with this guy? Was he made in a lab to be perfect? “Shouta over there is one of my best patients.”
Aizawa huffs and slaps his computer closed. “I highly doubt that.”
Patient? “I thought you two worked together.”
Tensei rolls his head to the side as he sighs, continuing this fake bashfulness thing. Unfortunately, it’s working for you; he’s sweet and humble, not to mention cute-
“We do.” He speaks so well, you're hanging off every word- “We modeled his leg together.”
Your eyes snap to Aizawa instinctively. Leg?
“Leg?” you say out loud, stupidly. 
Tensei’s air shifts. He turns to Aizawa, knot creased, lips delightfully downturned. “I didn’t realize it was a secret.”
“It’s not.” Aizawa sighs, “I thought everyone knew.” He hems. He haws. Then, the man tugs his pant leg up with one hand and you see a sliver of  gray metal at the ankle. Before you can really look at it, it’s gone, hidden once again. A prosthetic. It may not be a secret, but there’s definitely shame involved.
Everything snaps in place. The way he walks, the way he always shifts his weight-- you have a thousand questions, but none of them are appropriate.
“I didn’t realize,” you say, carefully. Aizawa is avoiding your eye very, very pointedly, but his beautiful friend is enthralled. 
“Wait, really? That’s great to hear!” Tensei rolls forward a bit.  “You didn’t notice anything at all? No difference in motion or-”
“He, uh, stomps, maybe.” You glance over. “Just a little.”
“I’ve always walked heavy-- The mobility is perfect, I told you.”  
“Are stairs the only pain trigger?” Tensei asks.
“That isn’t the prosthetic’s fault, it’s my body’s. I’m always in pain.”
Oh. Oh. You think back to the stairs incident and the bed on the fifth floor. That’s why he called you cruel. Shit. Making him climb all those stairs…. you were being an asshole to a man with a disability and chronic pain. 
God, no wonder he'd been so antagonistic-- he still started it, but maybe you went too far.
“You must love working with this old grump.” Tensei flashes a grin towards you, almost flirtatiously, and that pulls you out of your thought spiral. 
“Well-” You have to swallow your worry. You force a smile and just say:  “Shouta's always nice to me.”
All three men look at you in the same way.
“Really now?” Tensei says, and you’re almost annoyed by it. No, Aizawa isn’t nice, but… well, he’s your enemy, not Tensei’s. He should be nicer to his research partner.
“We're buddies.” Aizawa's dry sense of humor shines through. “Work… married, or whatever the term is.”
Hizashi barks out a laugh and throws his hair over his shoulder, eyes tight with healthy skepticism. “I thought I was your work husband!”
“I have two hands!”
Tensei never stops looking at you. You like how his fingers twitch when he says your name. “You’ve clearly got everyone wrapped around your finger.”
The way he talks. You think he might be wrapped there too.
“That’s just what she wants you to think.” Aizawa stands suddenly.  “Tensei, I changed my mind. Let’s take a look at my leg.”
Another customer has started to look at the booth, so Hizashi is on again. Tensei’s attention seems to only be distracted by the mentions of work. “Right now?”
“Why not?”
Tensei starts to roll up his sleeves. “Alright, take the pants off and we’ll-”
“God, not here.” 
Tensei just nods. “I was joking. I can go back to a room if you want.”
“I do.”
Just as suddenly as he appeared, Tensei leaves with Aizawa in tow. The older man turns and gives you the smallest, barely there nods as a goodbye before disappearing into the thickening crowd. Once Hizashi is free again a couple minutes later, you lean in and mumble.
“Are those secret lovers or something?”
It shocks a guffaw from Hizashi.
“Please, I wish Sho had a dirty little secret like that.” You hope he doesn’t see your eyes widen. “It would take a miracle for Shouta to have a little fuck buddy. He’s still not over-- well, his last thing.”
Last thing? He’s been single for the three years you’ve known him- what thing could he still be holding on to? You don’t have any room to judge -- you’ve been dating Touya since sixteen and can’t move on either.
“Why do you even care? Tensei caught your eye?”
You think about his pretty dark eyes and try to feel something. “Maybe.”
“Oooo-”
--
Your heels ache by the end of the day, so you slip your feet out of them from under the table. The restaurant is busy, both with people and decoration, and somehow even louder than the convention itself. The waitress has just left the second basket of chips - this one still hot from the fryer- because you and Hizashi have already demolished the first one. You should really get actual food to absorb the alcohol in your stomach, but Aizawa texted you to wait for him.
Texted. You.
It’s weird to see a new message under his name, an unread message you can peek at through your notifications. It feels illicit, raunchy, wrong--
Hizashi sucks at the end of his straw until it gurgles on ice. He’s smiley-er than usual-- and drunk as a skunk. Drinking on an empty stomach does that; you’re swaying already too and you're just two margaritas in. The man has his phone out, tinder open for you to swipe through. Men, women: everything wants a piece of Hizashi and you can’t blame them. His blonde hair is tousled ever so slightly, his glasses are halfway down his button nose-
How does Nemuri stop herself from getting jealous of the attention he gets and his looks? 
“Isn’t being here fucking great?” He takes a mouthful of chips.  “We talk all day and drink all night.”
He's trying to wave down your waiter. 
“You gonna text Dr. Tensei?” He lingers on the word doctor, drawing it out with a warm affection.You snort into your own empty glass and lick the salt from the rim. It’s smoked, a little spicy too. You try to blame the burn in your stomach on that, instead of thirty.
“I don’t even have his number!” you try.
Tensei is… well, almost perfect, but… you aren't sure. It's not that you don't want him, but… 
Maybe you're just gunshy. Touya has you scared to let go, move on. You try and think of Tensei and his sweet smile, his stubbled jawline, his downturned eyes and scarred cheek-
No, that's Aizawa you're thinking of. You physically shake the thought away. The last time you drank was when you saw his…
“But, I have his number!”Hizashi sings as he tries to fish an ice cube out with his drink. “I saw that look on your face; I know you’d love to sit on his face-”
“Shh!” You physically try to lower his volume by waving your hands in the air. A waitress passes, giving you both a strange look, but Hizashi just crunches his ice away happily. “I didn’t say that! He’s just--”
Sex isn't a priority for you. It’s not that you don’t like it, but it’s never as life changing and groundbreaking as you want it to be. By the time it started to feel good, Touya’s would be done and half asleep. (Not that you and Touya even had sex that often. The drug use and cheating scared you; he insisted he was safe, but. Well. He promised a lot of things. When you did have sex, it was with a condom and followed by four weeks of panic testing and STI googling.) 
Sex just never seemed worth the stress, you guess. Maybe it’d be different with someone else. Nemuri clearly likes having sex, so do the girls you see on twitter. Maybe you’re broken or something.
“He’s kinda sexy.”  You try to hold on to optimism. 
“He’s awful sexy!” Hizashi agrees. “I’ll slip you his number later-”
“Why not now?” you say.
“What’s now?”
From behind you, Aizawa strolls in, now devoid of his lovely outfit and stripped down to dress pants and a white undershirt. His hair is back into it’s little knotted bun, curls squashed into submission. When he reaches over the table, you can’t stop your drunken self from watching how his bicep flexes, muscle under thick skin. God, maybe you do need Tensei’s number and a good fuck-- you’re acting like a dog in heat over exposed arms. 
Thick arms, with the rounded hint of muscularity, but still. Just arms.
Aizawa tips the basket over and salt scatters across the table. “You guys didn’t save me a single chip.”
When did you guys finish the second one? The man sits next to you, thighs spread just enough to touch you for a moment. Your back straightens at the contact and, after a blink, you move away to give him more space. He smells like tobacco flower and musk, a surprisingly gentle cologne for a brash man.
“That's what you get for being late! There's shots coming-- how's that sound?”  Hizashi says, much too loud. 
A groan escapes you. Uh oh, you forgot about that: it’s time for you to slow down and eat something that isn't fried. Luckily, Aizawa is here now and the waiter is coming. She passes out the shots of tequila, then she’s gone again, giving Aizawa time to look at the menu she's handed him.
“Tapping out this early?” Aizawa asks. His elbow accidentally touches you as he scooches closer. “I’ll have yours if you don't want it.”
“Please do.” You push yours in front of him and Hizashi does the same.
“Miss girl and I have been having fun without you! Catch up, catch up!” he urges.
“I can tell. You’ve over-served her.” 
You resent that, especially since it’s Aizawa’s fault, but you can’t help but laugh. It gurgles out of you, a bit too drunkenly. “I just need to eat.” 
“The chips weren’t enough?”
“No!” Your mouth is running without your brain. “Ugh, I hate being drunk, I always text people that I shouldn’t.”
Hizashi and Aizawa both look at you, both thinking of very different things. Heat pools in your cheeks-- and a bit in your core, at Aizawa’s lidded gaze. 
“Hey, uh--” Hizashi scooches out from the booth seat and stands, brushing the salt off of his shirt. “Don't be mad, but I’m gonna go.”
Aizawa sneers and you do the same. After all this time, he couldn’t wait a bit longer? Does he really think it’s a good idea to leave the two of you alone? Sure, you were jokingly nice today, but that can’t keep going-
“What? I just got here.”  Aizawa seems to agree with you. 
He waggles his phone in the air, text messages abundant.  “Duty calls.”
At least someone’s getting laid tonight. Aizawa slides away from you and into the spot Hizashi just left, this pissed off look smeared across his face. 
“It’s still on me, don’t worry. Here’s my card- go nuts, kiddos.” Hizashi slaps his card on the table and turns on a dime, humming a jaunty little tune to himself. “Don’t be jealous!” 
“I’m older than you.”
“I’m thirty.”
The two of you are left in Hizashi’s wake, sitting awkwardly apart from each other. 
“So,” you try. “How was your-?”
“We don’t have to do this.” Aizawa slides Hizashi’s card towards you. “You can leave too, if you don’t want to deal with me.”
Usually, you stay quiet, but your drunk brain is taking over. You lean back in the booth and cross your arms, trying to be assertive. “I wish you wouldn’t do that.”
“Do what? Set you free?”
“Assume what I want,” you say. “I’m not allergic to having dinner with you. We can like, just talk and be normal. We did it all day.”
Aizawa’s face scrunches up in disapproval, but he doesn’t object. He sits in constipated misery for a long moment before sighing and unbunching his body. He mirrors your body language, crossing his arms and leaning back just enough that he isn’t hunched over himself. 
“My day was… fine.” he tries in earnest. “Good, even. Took a nap. Finished my presentations.”
“When are you presenting?”
He flips the menu over, then over again, unsettled. His foot is tapping under the table, bouncing the table a bit. “Tomorrow at eleven and Sunday at three.”  
“I want to watch the one with Tensei, is that okay?”
His brow crinkles at the mention of Tensei.
“I can’t stop you, but it’ll be pretty boring.” he shrugs. “Just polymer talk. Hanging with Hizashi will be more fun.”
“Well… I dunno, I love him,” You tread carefully. “But he’s such a horndog sometimes.”
Aizawa snorts and rolls his eyes. There’s the whisper of a grin trapped in his gaze, you think.
“It’s true! He abandoned us tonight!”
“You should have seen him when he first met Nemuri-- it was much worse. He would run off to her at the drop of a hat,” he says. “She would call and he’d get this dopey look on his face-”
“That’s cute though.” You are picking at the salt on the table, dreaming of days when Touya gave you that unmistakable, gooey expression.  “Every woman wants to be loved like that.”
When you glance up, Aizawa is watching you, expression relaxed. He takes a delicate pause, watching you from across the booth as if you’re a million miles away, a look that only locks in when you meet it. It’s almost somber, the way you both watch each other in reverent silence, the din of the restaurant around you growing. 
“He left me alone at a frat house once.” Aizawa interrupts your thoughts. You blanch, then laugh, hand over heart at the thought. “Ran away to get some guy across campus.”
“Wait-- you were in a frat house?” you wheeze. You try to imagine him, yellow sweatshirt in the middle of a sticky floored basement, crowded so close he’s forced to dance along. 
“Against my will.”
Aizawa takes a shot glass and tips it back, swallowing it all in one measured gulp.  He shivers at the taste, tongue stuck between his teeth in disgust. It’s cute. It’s sweet. You can see the silhouette of the college boy he used to be. When he swallows the second shot, he makes the same face, wrinkles deeper this time.
“Slow down-” you say. “You shouldn't really drink all three!” 
“Well, you’re clearly too drunk for another.”
“I’m not drunk!”
“Of course you are-”  he says. “It's why you're being so nice and chatty.”
You gasp and throw a hand to your forehead in fake shock. “I'm always nice!” 
Aizawa leans all the way back in the booth, eyebrow cocked skeptically. He sighs before he speaks. “If I remember correctly, you told me to go fuck myself.”
“No, you said that to me.” You close the gap between you by leaning forward into your elbows. “I said that you wished you could.”
It doesn’t feel scandalous to say until his eyes flicker down to your lips, then back up to your eyes. It’s only a second, a glimmer-- but it’s there, it’s real, it’s temptation. You’re not stupid; you’ve come to terms with the fact that you find Aizawa Shouta attractive, but the sudden attention makes your mouth salivate ever so slightly. 
“I don’t feel like that anymore, I think.” you manage. “At least I don’t hate you anymore.”
“I never hated you.” He leans forward too, head tilted, expression open. “I just wanted an apology.”
The moment grinds to a halt.
“Are you fucking kidding?” You want to scream. Words bubble in your chest, hot and dumb. “I’m not apologizing.”
You jam your feet into your shoes and start fumbling with your purse. Anger makes you clumsy, makes your eyes burn with tears. “Well, okay, I’ll apologize for the stairs, but nothing else. You were so mean to me, on my birthday-”
“And then you immediately sexted me.” Oh, how his calm demeanor gets you even hotter; you want him to scream back, to act pissed-- “How was I supposed to take that?”
“Happily!” You gesture to yourself. “I have great tits!”
“You do.”
“Urgh! Don’t say that!” You slide out of the booth. 
“I thought I was being nice.”
“You’re disgusting-”
“- I don’t know what you want from me. You’re so hot and cold-” Aizawa says, that look on his face.
“You are the one who told me to forget about the stupid texts!” you say. “New flash-- I texted you by accident and yet, I thought ‘maybe I’ll give him a chance’-”
You sniffle, those angry tears ruining your ire once again. Horror flashes across Aizawa’s face as he looks around, gauging the reaction of everyone around him.
“Then you turned me down!”
“I had a chance.” He whispers, carefully, shock enveloping his usually stoic face. You almost think he cares, that he regrets, with that almost childlike sadness smeared across his features. In fact, he almost reaches for you before you pull farther away. “I thought--”
“You fucking did.” You wipe your tears with your sleeve and try to channel Bakugo’s advice. “But not now! Treaty is done! Burned to the ground! I’m back to being a cunt!”
You say cunt a bit too loud. For what feels like the millionth time, you storm away, past the onlookers, away from the man of your -- well, certainly not of your affection. 
“Wait.” He calls after you. “Hold on, wait-- we haven’t paid--”
You march out into the street. The alcohol is hitting you; the stars in the sky streak together with the light pollution, the muffled noise of the restaurant eaten by the growl of the city. You turn left and march down the street, as fast as you can without running, wide, wide strides to distance yourself from the asshole behind you as quickly as possible. You run the first corner you can, then another, then-- wait,
You were supposed to go left, maybe. 
Taking the next street should turn you right around, but… the lane curves and curves and --
You turn around.
Huh. This next street feels even more wrong. The cement has turned to cobblestone, the traffic has died down to something more residential. You pull your phone from your pocket, just to find it dead. The screen won’t even light up. Dammit. Damn. It.
The tears in your eyes wobble from anger to fear. 
You’re lost. 
The hotel can’t be that far; it’s not like you’ve been walking for miles. The rubbed raw spots on your feet are already broken open again, each step blossoming with fresh, hot pain, but you keep pushing. Touya always told you that you were hopelessly directionless, but you didn’t think he meant it literally. 
Maybe you are, without him.
That’s how this mess started, really. Touya left you directionless, adrift in the world. He always pulled you down, but at least down is a direction and a destination.
Where do you want to go? Not just now, but in life? Do you want Touya to return and give you that pull, like a stone in black waters? 
No. You don’t. The love is still there, but the self harm, the horrors… you can’t keep losing your life in his aftershocks, can’t keep being pulled by his riptide.
You want stability, a home. Someone who worries about you the way you worry about them. You want to stop crying and start being who you used to be.
Could Shouta be that person? You don’t think so, but you know Touya isn’t that person either. You don’t deserve much in this world, but you at least deserve to give yourself a chance.
There’s a twenty four hour bodega, neon light dimmed to near extinguished. The owner sleepily tells you where to go and you thank him warmly before trudging back down the streets, It only takes fifteen minutes until you see the familiar glimmer of blue tile. The front dress asks if you are okay when you limp by, cut up feet on the brink of giving up themselves. The elevator is only filled with strangers, giggling and whispering to themselves.
Your floor is the home stretch. You peel off your heels; the front and backs of your feet are covered in broken skin, blood tinging the suede of your shoes. Bed is calling your name, along with another big, long, upheaving cry. The past month has left you brittle, weak-
“Hey. Hey!”
There’s a man in the hallway. Your man.
“Shouta?” Your voice is wrecked. Down by your room is the familiar face of your enemy, pacing the hall. A couple of wide steps and he’s there on you, hands finding your waist,dragging you in so close that his forehead bonks against yours. Tendrils of curls tickle your cheeks as he huffs in relief, warm breath hot against your nose and cheeks. Surprise leaves you speechless, but he finds words. 
“Where were you?” His voice bites out, harsh and rude. “You weren’t answering your phone or the door, I thought-- You’re bleeding.”
If he wasn’t so close, you’d wipe your nose and tears away, but he has you locked in those broad hands. They rub up and down your waist, worrying away at you with an almost anxious annoyance.
“I’m an adult,” you sniffle despite your annoyance. “You don’t get to be mad at me for staying out late--”
“I’m not mad, I’m terrified.” You’ve never seen him so vulnerable before. The lacquer of seriousness is gone, replaced by something strangely human, wildly unique from the person you once knew. For the second time tonight, you think you see who he used to be, the silhouette of a twenty year old you’ll never know. “You can’t disappear into the city without contact-- you scared me.”
You know that fear. You’ve lived it. The way Touya comes and goes, the way he frays the fabric of your worries simply for his own wills and wants-
“I’m sorry,” you whisper.
“No, I’m sorry.” He’s pulling you closer. “I’m so sorry.”
When his lips touch yours, it feels like home. It’s impossibly soft and warm, with the glide of chapstick, but what you focus on is how you are held. He cradles you, with trembling, needy, questioning hands, firm with want, questioning if you want this too. You don’t know if you do until your arms loop around his shoulders and tug him in deeper, harder-
When he pulls away, you don’t know if this was the right thing, but it feels right, deep, deep, deep in your heart and even deeper in your core. 
“I’m sorry,” he says again before pressing into you once more, this time with his whole body, walking you backwards into the door of your room, The pressure of him holds you in place.
“I’m so sorry.” Aizawa speaks it into your lips. You’re fumbling backwards, feeling in your pocket for your swipe card as his tongue dips into your mouth. He groans into the contact, low and animalistic, hungry and reverent. Every emotional nerve in you is fried and your brain is refusing to think, but something inside you is pink, blossoming with want. It’s the first time in maybe years you’ve felt this unbelievably, unquestionably good.
Aizawa’s teeth close around the plush of your lip and you gasp at the want it makes you feel alive. To be so aggressively wanted- 
Your keycard finds the slot on the door and the lock beeps open. You manage to break away enough to fumble to knob open-- 
And you two slide inside.
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seresinhangmanjake · 6 months
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Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader - We Both Know
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Summary: Simon broke up with you but you both know it was a stupid choice.
Notes/Warnings: Stalker-ish Ex!Simon; Soft!Simon; Insecure!Simon (a little bit); some smut (18+), fluff, cursing, typos probably
Words: 1642
He’s here. You know he’s here. Not because you can see him or hear him or feel him—he’s too skilled for that—but because you know Simon Riley like the back of your damn hand. And Simon Riley won’t let you go. He has not proven himself capable of letting you go. Not yet, not fully, and if you can help it, not ever.
When you close the door behind you and kick off your shoes, you don’t bother turning on the lights. You’ve spent nearly two months flipping that switch in your entryway, pretending he isn’t somewhere in your apartment. Two months of going about your nightly routine as if there isn’t an intruder in your home. Two months of ignoring the soft shutting of your front door or window once you’ve settled into bed. But you’re tired of playing this game, and frankly, you miss him—the man; not the ghost who has been haunting you, trailing you, hiding in plain sight.
“You've been watching me,” you announce into the void. 
A handful of beats pass but not for a second do you let yourself believe you’re crazy for attempting to converse with blackness and silence. Then the little cord on your lamp is pulled by thick fingers, illuminating the side of the apartment where he stands. He’s a shadow in the corner of your living room, drenched in black from head to toe, skull-printed balaclava included, and it takes everything in you not to rush to his side, shove that piece of fabric up over his chin, and kiss him.
“You've made it necessary,” he scolds; the first words he has spoken to you in nearly sixty-five days. It’s the longest he has forced you to go without hearing his voice, having been attached at the hip since you met; and having that smooth, deep tone in your ear is like soaking your body in a hot bath, sloughing off the wear and dirt and grime to come out renewed and refreshed.
You nod because you know what you’ve been doing. You’ve known your choices would bring him back to you. You hoped, at least. But you also hoped he would give himself and his stalker behavior up long before you would have to call him out. He’s usually much more possessive when you spend your evenings drinking and freely dancing amongst crowds, and the thought of you flirting with other men has always put him in a sour mood. You thought seeing it up close would make his vision go red, but he's held himself back. However, you suppose him watching and following you from a distance is better than not caring to watch or follow you at all. 
“You're not being safe,” he tells you. 
“You mean I'm doing things you're not happy with.”
Simon doesn't respond to that. He can’t, because you’re absolutely right and he isn’t the type to disrespect you by lying to your face.
“You broke up with me to—what was it—‘live my life’ while you're gone? Do you really have a right to be pissed at me for getting a head start?” you ask as you take steps further into the apartment and toss your purse on the counter. “If that's the case, maybe you should've dumped me a little closer to your deployment date so you wouldn’t have to witness it.”
Now you do feel him. You see him through the mask. He’s bubbling inside, the beginning of a boil, because he made a silly choice and doesn’t like to be reminded of his mistakes. He hasn’t exactly voiced that, specifically, but it’s the truth. It was silly. It’s also the truth—though again, not specifically expressed—that he regretted it the very minute he walked away from you, leaving you in tears because he is the one afraid of what will happen when the two of you face his first deployment in your relationship. He is afraid to come back home expecting a loving welcome only to find disappointment if you’ve chosen to seek out the comfort of another man. So, ‘Don’t let me hold you back, love’’ he’d told you. ‘Live your life, and I’ll figure out what to do with myself.’
Simon groans, grumbles, vibrates the room. He begins to close the distance between you until he thinks better of it and halts beside your couch. “I did it because–”
“Do you miss me?” 
“That is not rela–”
“Do, you, miss, me,” you press.
He swallows hard, Adam’s apple protruding under the balaclava. His fist clenches at his side. You don’t think he's going to give you the satisfaction, but then he sighs and says, “Of course I fucking miss you.”
Your breath catches in your throat and your vision starts to blur at the edges. Those words heal the bits of your heart that he broke when he left.
“Then don’t be stupid,” you say, crossing the room until your chest is nearly pressed against his. You rest your hand on his cheek, or what would be his cheek if not for the mask. “Don't make us spend your last week here apart from one another.”
With another exhale, his shoulders loosen their rigidity, and in that moment you know you have him.
“Fuck me, Si,” you whisper. 
His eyes flick to yours. A flash burns through his irises.
“It'll just make it harder.” That pathetic argument betrays his actions. One of his palms instantly goes to your waist, gently tracing the curve. The gesture is so natural between you you’re not sure if he even knows he’s doing it. 
“I promise it won’t,” you say. 
Then your hands slide along his shoulders to grip his biceps and you slowly turn his body until you can push him into a seated position on the couch. He lets you lead. He lets you staddle his lap. He lets you lift the mask a few inches and connect your lips as you grind your hips down, hardening him within his pants. 
Simon’s fingers squeeze your thighs. They travel to your hips, encouraging your movements, before they continue a path up your spine. With his tongue in your mouth, you lose track of his touch for some time until he’s settled on a placement for his hands. One wrapped around your waist, hugging you tight; the other woven into your hair, holding you in place as his kisses swell your lips, verging on bruising. 
“Come on, baby,” you mutter into his ear when you break the connection to breathe. “Don’t you want to be all warm and snug inside me? Don’t you miss how well you fit? Like my pussy was made for you, right? That’s what you’ve always said.”
You know how it sounds. It’s desperate and needy, but you don’t care. You’re begging, not just for the man who sets your body aflame, but for the man who altered the trajectory of your life when he entered it. The man you refuse to live without. 
“Love–” he starts, but his groan from the nibbles you give to his neck interrupts him. 
“You can rest deep in me for a while if you want. I’ll stay perfectly still for you. Or I can go nice and slow the way you like.”
Moving your head back, you stop the shifting of your hips and lock your gazes. You pointlessly wait for him to deny you. Pointlessly because Simon Riley doesn’t deny you in situations like this. The equal balance of your need for one another has made that impossible, so it doesn’t surprise you one bit when he nods in agreement.
Your thumbs delicately guide the balaclava over his nose, but you stop there. Only he removes the mask. It’s his right; his decision to show his face and to whom. You are one of the lucky ones, but you’ve never taken advantage of that gift. 
With one hand, Simon grips the top of his mask and jerks it the rest of the way off his head—hair sticking out in a million directions—as he sneaks his other between your bodies to undo the button of his pants. He lifts his hips, bouncing you on his lap, before you do the same so he can push his pants down his thighs. 
You don’t spend time marveling at the thick column of flesh he’s pumping with his fist. You know everything about his cock. Every ridge and valley from base to tip. Every vein. Every inch of him you have memorized, and you’re too hungry to waste another second without him where you want him most.
When Simon finally slides inside of you, you hum in satisfied delight. Like basking in the heat of the sun after the chill of Winter. Like the first bite of your favorite ice cream hitting your tongue. Like quenching a thirst. Like coming home. 
Simon’s head falls back against the couch and his chest heaves with heavy inhales and exhales. His eyes are closed, but you catch a hint of a smile on his face.
“We feel so good together, Si,” you say, slowly rubbing your hand up and down his chest. “I want this when you return. Don’t you want this when you return?”
He doesn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
“Then why deprive yourself of what you love? Especially when what you love wants you so bad.”
He lifts his head and reaches up to brush his knuckle from your cheekbone to your chin. “I was trying to make it easier.”
Palms cupping his jaw, you run your thumb over his bottom lip. “Fuck easy.”
“Love, it’ll be a year. No less.”
“I don’t care,” you swear. You start to rise and then you sink back down onto him. “I'll be waiting for you, Simon.”
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cinellieroll · 7 months
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☆ random obey me headcanons!
lucifer, mammon and simeon ♡
part two (asmodeus, levi, barbatos)
part three (beelzebub, belphegor, solomon)
part four (satan and diavolo)
cw: a few spoilers ahead from the main story! also one SLIGHT nsfw on simeons part???
small note: i only started writing on tumblr now so idk much on how ppl do those line thingies on the words and then it teleports to a diff post so if anyone knows how to do it please teach me! thank you :3
☆ lucifer:
- generally has a thing for turtlenecks. if you open his closet you'll see a bunch of turtlenecks in there. lucifer is a very conservative man after all.
- speaking of closet, he definetely has a color code for his clothing. blacks, reds, navy blues, anything dark
- you'll never catch him wearing anything revealing. especially his legs. man keeps em hidden.
- has a very sensitive nose. he always scolds mammon and asmo for wearing such strong cologne. he has great sense of smell in general (the bitch can smell anything) and automatically knows when trouble is near.
- EXTREMELY petty when he doesn't get his morning coffee. if he misses a day without it an extra line will appear on his forehead.
- gifts you souvenirs when he enters the human world. claims he's here for business because diavolo told him but we all know that's not the only reason why he came up there.
- he doesn't like writing with modern pens and only settles with quills. he still has his old quill from the celestial realm and keeps it hidden somewhere.
- almost gave head pats to luke once.
- his nose is FUCKING BEAUTIFUL and his side profile too. he has a nose bump for sure and i will die on this hill.
- he's not a big fan of creamy foods like carbonara or anything with cream in general. if he's eating sweets he prefers the icing to be less flavorful. what do you expect? he's a black coffee lover after all.
☆ mammon:
- room is always a fucking mess, but he cleans when he procrastinates so if you ever enter his room and he's all quiet and cleaning just don't disturb him for a while.
- buys bootleg merch for levi for no reason. one time he found this cheap ruri chan stuffy on sale for like 150 grimm and decided to buy it.
- has fucking shit hand writing bro. sometimes it's small, sometimes it's big but most of the time it's ass balls. like why does your k and h look the same?
- he cracks his knuckles and joints often and can't go without a day doing it atleast once. it's kinda hot tbh lol
- when he's in a happy mood he'll sing in like a high pitched way. idk how to explain it but i just see him doing that especially when he's on cooking duty
- sleeps really late he could almost rival levi on it. surprisingly his eyebags aren't that visible though.
- has really pretty features like long eyelashes, plump lips and visible collarbones. eat your heart out asmo xoxo
- convinced himself he'll never ever like or listen to human world songs until he heard you blasting some music in your room. he was singing that song in his head for days on end but refused to ask you what the title was
- he's a very clumsy guy and often drops small things especially during class like his ballpen, eraser or that pack of bubblegum lucifer ended up confiscating
- before you arrived, he liked to vape or juul when he's stressed or felt lonely but now he only spends his time thinking of you when he feels down.
☆ simeon:
- when he turned into a human he had thoughts of becoming a teacher in christian education but realized it's better if he owned a cafe instead.
- he sometimes joins luke during his baking lessons with barbatos even though he already knows all the steps
- occasionally invites you for sleepovers and buys card / board games for you guys to play with solomon and luke! either he or solomon are always end up being the winners everytime though
- always and i mean ALWAYS willing to teach you something when he knows it. baking, writing, recent lessons, etc
- once the exchange program ended he started writing more and more, especially poetry. and mostly wrote about you and how much he misses you <3.
- started making diary entries after the aftermath of the celestial war.
- during quiet nights, simeon often thinks what it'd be like if he was really close with the brothers.
- his eyes are lowkey creepy sometimes when he looks at you for too long. it's like he's trying to detect every sin you've committed.
- idk why i thought of this but his teeth are literally so pearly and perfect but he doesn't really smile with them in view.
- unintentionally moans sometimes. like when he sits down after a long day you just start hearing a soft "ah~" out of nowhere..
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sunshinescribes · 1 year
Note
Heyy sunny, i just read the story about Law with his head bury on s/o chest and i was like: damn, that's hot. And i kinda think Law need more pampering like pat in his head, caressing his knuckles or something. So, since your request is open, can we get Trafalgar Law get pampered by his s/o?
If you didn't wanna write it, you can skip this one :0
TENDER
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Pairing: Trafalgar Law x GN!Reader
Warnings: Fluff, comfort, Law is whipped but also bad at feelings
Sometimes Law thinks he dreamed you.
When you thread your fingers through his hair after a long day, massaging his scalp while whispering sweet praise, or absentmindedly caress his knuckles, leaving phantom kisses against his inked skin—he doesn’t think you’re real.
You come to him when he needs you most, as if you know he desires a comforting hand, a friendly word, and he melts into you every single time. His defenses shatter—the wall he’s constructed all this life comes tumbling down, and you hold him through the carnage.
You’re everything his heart secretly craves—so tender-hearted and caring, and wonderful—everything he feels he’s not.
And God, does he wonder what you see in him. Wonders how he manages to attract the kindest people when all he has to offer is practiced indifference. He doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve, doesn’t voice the things he feels, but it doesn’t deter you, and despite how brilliant he is, Law can’t make sense of it. He could spend a lifetime trying to figure you out and would never even come close.
“What is going on in that pretty head of yours?” You inquire, your brow raised playfully as you stare down at him. “Can hear the gears in your head movin’.”
His head is in your lap, your soft fingers brush back mutinous strands of hair from his forehead, and he blinks up at you dumbly. It’s one of those rare peaceful evenings where the crew unwinds and breathes a sigh of relief as the Polar Tang slips through the sea, pushing you all towards your next destination with ease.
It takes a moment for your compliment to register—that pretty head of yours—and Law hates how his heart flutters. You say the most…outlandish things without considering their effect—flattery he never expected to like, but they always sound so lovely coming from you. The urge to look at anything but your pretty face almost overtakes him, but he fights his urges, keeps his dark eyes trained on you.
Instead, he arches a sharp brow at you and attempts to sound mildly offended, even though he’s certain you see right through him. “Pretty?”
You purse your lips, feigning thought.
“Would you prefer beautiful? Gorgeous?”
He rolls his eyes, but your soft teasing does little to calm the rapid beat of his unruly heart. When has anyone ever thought him pretty? Beautiful?
You say it as if it’s one of life’s simple truths, but he feels you’re much more deserving of such compliments, and he would shower you with them if he knew how to stop himself from biting his tongue.
Your free hand moves from its spot on his exposed chest, trailing upward until you’re softly cradling his jaw. You dip down, placing a tender kiss on his supple lips.
“Brains and beauty,” you murmur against his lips. “How lucky am I?”
I’m the lucky one, he thinks. To be cared for like this—to be treated like something worthy of being cherished and loved.
And maybe it’s the fear that makes the words catch in his throat, stops him from ripping out his bleeding heart and handing it to you.
He’s never had a good thing that lasted. Only fleeting moments of happiness, ripped right from under him just when he thinks tragedy can never reach him again. He’s lost so much already, and yet there’s always more to lose.
But you continue to smile at him, kiss years of self-loathing away, share your warmth and affection for as long as he accepts it, and Law allows himself to become a little hopeful—thinks maybe you’ll be the first good thing he gets to keep.  
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A/N: I feel like this kinda got away from me, but not in the "I wrote too much" way and more so the "I feel I deviated too far from the original prompt and am almost certain I was possessed while writing this" way. Despite that, I hope you enjoyed! I love love LOVE writing soft love for Law so this is a PSA to flood my requests with fluffy prompts!!!
Divider credit: @/cafekitsune
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gurugirl · 9 months
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A Little Naughty | bfd!harry
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best friend's dad!harry x reader
Summary: Your parents invite Harry to come with you for Christmas and you feel a little bit naughty after everyone's in bed.
Word Count: 3360
Warning: smut, fluffy fluff, age gap
Best Friend’s Dad Masterlist
You and Harry were dreamily staring at one another as you sipped your hot chocolate in the cute little café across from the park with the huge twinkly Christmas tree. Everyone was wearing jackets and boots and scarves. It wasn’t that cold but it felt like the right season to bundle up anyway.
It seemed like once you told everyone about you and Harry things only became better between you. You were more attached to him than ever and he was always checking on you.
You quit working at the restaurant and began looking for a better job. Which made Harry really happy. It also made him really happy when you told him you had gotten your implant removed. It was sort of a surprise for him. An early Christmas present. Kind of. You didn’t know how well it would actually go over. You’d talked about it but making that step was huge. But he was overjoyed when you told him. So overjoyed that you wound up on your tummy with your pussy being pounded into before he was coming inside of you (only after you’d already come because he was a gentleman of course). Yeah, it went over pretty well you’d say.
“Can’t wait to get you in bed later. Gonna stuff you so full every day,” he whispered and took a sip.
You laughed and looked around the café, “You’ve been stuffing me full since day one, Mr. Styles,” you teased.
You were both out getting last-minute Christmas gifts for your family. Your mom and dad invited you and Harry over for Christmas. And you’d need to stay the night most likely because the festivities usually included spiked punch and wine so you and Harry would stay in your childhood room. You were surprised when your mom also invited Harry. She said she would have felt bad if she didn’t.
Harry was nervous about the whole thing but you two were doing this together and even if things were awkward, well, that was just the price you had to pay.
.           .           .
You woke up to Harry’s morning wood digging into your thigh. He rocked his hips against you which made you laugh, “Well good morning to you. Like a horny teenager,” you stretched and rolled to face him.
“More like a horny man who’s full of vitality,” he laughed as he spoke.
“You know it’s recommended that you don’t come too often, right? Like to build up a little sperm. Every other day or something like that. And you came in me twice yesterday.”
Harry scrunched his brow, “Are you seriously asking me to wait two days before I get to come? When you’re right here,” he lowered his hand to your bottom and pressed his mouth against yours before continuing his convincing spiel, “So soft and warm. Always so wet and needy too. You don’t want my cock opening up your wet little hole and thrusting into you over and over again until your orgasming? Feels so good, though.”
You moaned. The man always had a way with words, “I mean, you know I love it. I’m not saying that. Just saying that if you really want to knock me up you gotta conserve a little.”
Harry softly swiped his nose into yours, “How about we just fuck like rabbits and see what happens. Plus we gotta go without it tonight and most of the day tomorrow since we’ll be at your parents. We’ll conserve then. But right now,” Harry pulled you in, lifting your thigh over his hip so you could feel his hard dick against your pussy, “I want to make love to my sweet girl.”
He licked at the crease of your mouth and you opened up right away, kissing him back and slipping your hands into the hair at the back of his head. You both rocked against each other as you kissed lazily until you grew wetter and wetter.
Harry gripped your thigh and angled himself to press into you, the yummy pinch of his thick head poking through your entrance had you groaning.
“See?” He rocked into you and pulled back, “Gotta take good care of you, baby.”
You nodded and let Harry take control. You couldn’t move much in the position you were in on your side, but Harry was able to drive himself inside of you as he rolled his hips over and over again.
“You want me to take care of you?”
“Yes, Harry. You’re so good at taking care of me,” you moaned your words against his mouth.
“Every day baby. Gonna have you on my cock every day like this til I put a baby in you. And when you’re all big and swollen with my baby growing inside you I’m gonna take care of you then too. Fuck you soft and slow and make you feel so good. Show you how much I love you. How much I need you.”
You loved how Harry’s big dick slid through you in long, deep strokes. How tight he held you against him. The strength in the way he handled you and yet with such gentleness that made you trust him so completely.
“Jesus, Harry…” you mewled before scraping your nails along the back of his neck.
His hips began to snap into you, the perfect drag of his cock against your g-spot had you panting and the bed shifting under your bodies.
“You make my cock feel so good baby. So creamy and tight,” he pulled back and you could hear just what he meant by how wet you were.
Harry’s soft whine against your lips before he began to move his lips around yours made you melt. You loved when your big, strong man whined and whimpered. You did that to him and you’d never get tired of it. He always let you know how good everything felt. He had no hang-ups about being vulnerable with you.
“Fuck, it’s so deep,” you moaned and nipped at Harry’s lip, making him inhale sharply. But that only egged him on. He rolled you onto your back and began to pound into you, long and heavy strokes making your tummy boil.
Harry’s hips were striking against you with each plunge inward, wet and achy with the smallest hint of pain that only made you grow wetter around him, your arousal slipping down your ass.
“Oh, ahhh!!” Harry deeply panted as he buried himself into you repeatedly.
You clawed at his back and felt the way his muscles flexed and bulged under your fingers. He was putting his all into fucking you.
The unwinding of your inevitable orgasm crashed over your limbs in a hot burst and the moment Harry felt your wet pussy clamping down on him he drove into you deeply with only a few more thrusts before he began to come inside of you, pressing deep into your guts with a heavy groan.
The throbbing of his orgasming cock had you smiling as you moaned. It was the best feeling knowing he had his release because of you.
Harry’s soft moans slowed and you laughed when he crumbled onto your chest.
You let him lie there for a bit as you both savored the moment of the soft bliss after coming together.
“I guess I should get up.” He spoke against your neck.
You nodded and laughed, “Well I do have to shower after that. And I need coffee.”
.           .           .
You appreciated how strong Harry was. He was in the middle of an ugly divorce (though it was moving along faster than you anticipated) and you knew he was stressed but he never made you feel bad. He always made you smile and laugh. But you could see him in moments he didn’t think you were watching.
Like after you’d seen him text Merry Christmas to Fae, there was a small smile on his face as he put his phone away. Something that seemed hopeful. But then he kept checking to see if she would respond. When you watched his face fall after he checked his phone again right before you were about to leave to head to your parents your heart dropped.
You didn’t say anything to him about what you’d noticed. Didn’t want to have him feel like he needed to explain himself. It was a delicate situation.
You were just happy your mom invited him to come with you because you didn’t want to leave him alone on Christmas. His first without Fae since she was born.
When he felt your arms wrap around him and felt you press yourself into his back he loosened a bit. It was hard enough to know that his daughter hated him, but now he was about to face your parents, whom he hadn’t seen in a couple of years. And he was the same age as they were (well, a couple of years younger but still).
“You sure this is okay?” He asked you as he placed his hands over your arms so you wouldn’t let go.
“Yes. I didn’t ask them to invite you. They wanted to.”
“Just a little nervous about this,” Harry laughed lightly and turned himself in your arms to scoop you up and squeeze you tight to his chest, making your legs dangle in the air.
When he gently put your feet back onto the floor you kept your hand on his arm to keep his attention, “If things get weird at all we can leave. They won’t, but I just want you to know I’m not going to force you to stay there if anything makes you uncomfortable.”
Harry cupped your face, “Uncomfortable I can deal with. I’ll be fine.”
.           .           .
“He’s so hot. No wonder,” your cousin whispered to you as you were in the kitchen setting everything for dinner.
You kept your eyes on the table as you set a plate at the center of the placemat, “He’s attractive, yes. But I love him so it’s more than just about that.”
She snorted and took a sip of her wine, “I guess. I mean he chose you over his own dau–“
You whipped yourself around to glare at her, “Don’t do that. You have no idea how hard this has been.”
You knew some of your family would have their opinions but you didn’t expect anyone to say anything out loud. Though your cousin tended to speak before thinking, she dropped it after that.
And luckily that was the worst of it. Your mother and father greeted you and Harry with open arms and big smiles when you arrived. Harry had brought two very nice bottles of wine and a Christmassy bouquet of flowers, which you told him wasn’t necessary but he insisted.
Your aunt and uncle and cousin had never met him before but the age gap was evident and they knew a little about what was going on. But no one made a fuss about anything.
Harry stayed glued to your side for the better part of the evening. At the dinner table, he sat next to you. When his hands weren’t occupied with a glass or a utensil he had his hand on your thigh.
Your mom bought a gift for Harry and wrapped it so that when it was time to open gifts, he was included in the moment. You and Harry sat on the floor and your cousin was on the other side of the Christmas tree as your dad handed everyone a gift.
“For you, Harry,” he smiled as he handed your boyfriend the wrapped present with a little red bow on top.
“Thank you. This is so nice,” he looked from your dad to your mom and then down at you.
You’d gotten a pair of nice wool socks and a new book, and for Harry, they got him a pair of matching wool socks and a beanie cap.
By the time everyone was done eating and opening gifts things felt warmer and looser. You figured it was thanks to your mom’s punch. Which was generously being refilled when she brought the pitcher out to top up everyone’s glasses.
You were leaned against Harry’s side, his arm around your low back as you both sat on the floor chatting with everyone. You could feel how warm Harry was and when his hand sneakily slid up the back of your sweater, just the tiniest bit, you looked at him and smiled softly. He had his own lips pulled into his mouth and in some moment of insanity or maybe it was the punch he plopped a quick kiss on your lips.
“Oh, you two are so cute!” Your aunt trilled and everyone’s eyes were on you.
“They are. I’ve noticed how sweet they’ve been all night. Better get the earplugs out for bedtime,” your cousin laughed as she looked at your dad and mom.
“Oh my god, stop,” you laughed and put your hands over your face and you could feel Harry as he laughed next to you.
Your aunt and uncle slept in the spare guest room, your cousin on the couch, and you and Harry in your old room. Your bed was small but you were looking forward to getting to lay close to him and talk to him away from the prying ears of everyone.
“Cute,” Harry said as he looked at the decorations you had in your room. “I’m guessing your parents haven’t changed anything.”
You shook your head, “No. Mom said it would always be here for whenever I wanted to come and live with them again,” you laughed. “I think she was in denial when I first moved out.”
“Understandable,” he nodded, a solemn look on his face as he sat down on your bed.
You recognized the sudden mood change and sat next to him, taking his hand, “I love you, Harry. I’m so glad we could spend Christmas together. Are you okay?” You reached across to cup his cheek.
He sighed and nodded, “I love you too. I’m happy with you, Y/n. So happy we are together right now. But I do miss Fae. This brings back lots of memories of her room. Even the photo of you two over there. I took that one if I recall correctly.”
You looked toward the framed photo of you and Fae side hugging and wearing matching overalls with goofy grins.
“I think you did, actually.” You leaned your head onto his shoulder and he kissed your forehead.
When you’d both gotten settled in the bed Harry had pulled you onto his chest and slowly dragged his hand up and down your back as he spoke in a quiet whisper, “This was fun. I’m so happy your parents invited me. Feels a little awkward but I guess that’s just part of the deal isn’t it?”
You could hear the smile in his voice as you lifted your head and put your chin over his pec to look at him in the dark, “Guess so.”
You smoothed your hand down his bare chest and to the band of his joggers before he quickly shifted, “What are you doing?”
“Just trying to make things feel better. Make you forget all about sad stuff,” you crept your fingers under the elastic of his pants but Harry stopped you, putting his hand over yours.
“Don’t. We can’t do anything in your parent's house. And besides, what about conserving? Hmm?”
You softly laughed and kissed his nipple, moving yourself to peck across his sternum to the other side of his chest, “We can do whatever we want if we’re quiet. And I have a feeling you don’t need to conserve. I bet you’re super fertile.”
Harry's chest vibrated with a groan, “Bad idea.” He grabbed your face and lifted it so you’d stop kissing his chest.
“Good idea,” you teased back in a whisper. “You don’t want to play around a little? I know we can be so quiet.” Your words were smushed with the way Harry’s hand held your jaw to keep you still.
“I don’t want there to be any possibility of them hearing or thinking anything is going on.”
Harry softly let go of your face and you lowered your hand that was in his sweatpants the slightest, “Please? Mr. Styles, I’ll be so quiet. Let me just lick you a little and pump your cock so you can come. I’ll take all the mess down my throat so we won’t even need to clean up or anything. Please?”
When your hand found his cock he was already plumping up to your delight.
“Fuck, Y/n. I already said this is a bad idea.” He was already giving in.
You palmed over him and adjusted his length so he was pointed upward in his pants, “You’re already getting hard. It’ll be so fast and you’ll sleep like a baby after. Right?”
Harry puffed out a laugh through his nose and gulped down his saliva. He knew he’d come fast if he didn’t have to worry about you getting off too. And it would eliminate any mess if you wrapped your soft lips around his tip as he began to come.
You hesitantly began to stroke him as you lowered your mouth back down to his chest, to lick and kiss again. The deep tremor from his torso let you know that he was a go as you dotted kisses all over his strong chest.
When he began to rock his hips upward in your hand you took that as your cue. You sat up and pulled his pants down to let his big cock out and you licked along his shaft, softly wetting him so you could pump his length properly.
The only sounds Harry made were the smallest grunts and soft pants as you kissed along his hips and continued to stroke him in your hand, down to the base against the thatch of dark hair and upward to his swollen head, already leaking precome. Every now and then you wrapped your lips around his tip and suckled, digging your tongue into his slit and leaving behind a healthy amount of saliva to keep him nice and wet.
Harry felt his balls tighten and he put his hand to the back of your head, “Bout to come, baby…” he whispered in a panic as you were pressed down over the head of his cock.
You kept your hand at his shaft, sliding up and down as you sucked and swiped your tongue all around his tip and the underside of his frenulum when you felt his cock tighten and then throb as he pumped his orgasm down your throat silently.
You swallowed and gulped as you lowered your hand to his balls and gently squeezed, which drew an unintentional moan from his lips but he stopped himself before he got too loud.
With his balls drained and his come in your tummy you licked up from his base to his tip and he laughed quietly, pulling you up to his mouth.
You both smiled into the soft kiss.
Harry moved a hand down to your bottom and pinched you over the fabric of your night pants. Laughing into his mouth he tsk’d at you, “That was naughty. Santa isn’t going to give you your presents this year.”
You sighed and laid your head over his chest, “Don’t need anything from Santa anyway. You’re all I want. And you were practically silent the whole time. No one would ever know what I just did to you.”
Harry breathed out a laugh and draped his arm over your back. You could feel his heart pounding, slowly the cadence got lazy as he caught his breath and calmed.
“I’m so wet,” you smiled as you whispered.
Harry hummed, “Well you’ll just have to deal with it. Because you can’t keep quiet and there’s no way your parents wouldn’t know something was up.”
You didn’t mind in all truth. You only wanted to make Harry come anyway, “Don’t worry, Harry. I got exactly what I wanted anyway.”
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907 notes · View notes
moonstruckme · 11 months
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/moonstruckme/732380895517032448/how-blind-do-you-think-james-is-without-his
I also wear glasses and I can't see well without them. Imagine reader looking for her glasses because she and James slept on the sofa and ended up losing them, she asks him for help but he also lost his. It would be funny for the two of them to try to find their glasses inside the sofa with just the touch of their hands and with their eyes half closed to see if they can see better and find them.
Yessss, thanks babe!
James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 689 words
You rouse to sweet, tender kisses on your shoulder. Then your clavicle, then your throat, and that’s odd. Your brows furrow as you blink your eyes open. James usually goes straight for your face when he’s feeling lovey. His lips feel odd, imprecise as they move up your neck. Like he’s searching. 
“Sweetheart.” James' voice is soft and honeyed. “My sweetest, most beautiful girl, I need your help. Wake up, please.” 
“M’up.” Your hand finds his hair, curls fluffy from sleep. “What is it, Jamie?” 
“I slept for too long,” he tells you, leaning up into your touch. “I dunno what time it is, but it’s dark and I’m sure I’m supposed to be at practice, and I can’t find my glasses.” 
“Alright,” you sigh, arching up off the couch in one of those deeply satisfying stretches you can only have after a good nap. “Okay, let me—” You go to rub your eyes under your glasses, only to find there’s nothing in the way. “Shit. My glasses are gone too.” 
James groans. “No way. They’re not next to your face?”
You’re already sitting up, patting around where you’d been lying. Your hands meet only the plush cushions of your couch. “Nope. God, we must have been sleeping hard, huh?” 
“Haven’t had a nap that good in at least a decade,” James agrees. “Alright, get up so I can have a feel.” Even without being able to see you, he must sense the look on your face, because he clarifies, “A feel of the couch, you degenerate. Move.” 
You snicker as you get up, joining him in feeling around the couch. “Your vision’s better than mine. Can you see anything?” 
“Pfft. Blind’s blind, sweetheart. It’s all blob to me. Hey, I’m going to shake out this blanket, let’s see if we hear anything hit the ground, yeah?” 
You both fall silent as James jerks the blanket up and down, waiting for the telltale clatter of something hitting the floor. He makes a dissatisfied sound once it’s clear nothing’s going to happen, but you drop to your hands and knees to feel around the floor just in case. 
“Careful, I’m by your feet.” 
“Yeah, I can see that. Christ, love, I’m not so blind I can’t detect movement.” 
You start giggling and can’t stop, shoulders shaking as you crawl around on the floor. 
You can hear the smile in James’ voice when he asks, “What’s so funny?”
“This is just so ridiculous,” you laugh. “It’s the blind leading the blind. How’d we both lose them?”
“Best nap ever,” James says solemnly. 
“True,” you say. “Maybe if we—hey, wait, I found something! It’s—oh. It’s yours.” 
James all but lunges for you, taking the glasses from your hands as you come up to your knees. “Well don’t sound so happy about it.” He brings his hands towards his face, and that’s as much as you can make out. Then they come back for you, gripping your jaw with newfound precision to guide your lips to his. “Thanks, angel.” 
It’s odd not being able to see him when you know he can see you, your pleased smile at his endearment. “Can you see mine?” 
“I’m looking, just a sec.” James brushes a touch against your shoulder on his way to the couch, and you can hear the cushions rustling with faster, surer movements. “Got ‘em. Hold still, sweetheart.” 
You do as he says. You know just as well as he does that you could put them on yourself, but you like when James does things for you and James likes when you go all soft and smiley on him. He slides the frames onto your face, taking a moment longer to straighten them on your nose than he strictly needs to. 
“Thanks,” you say, glad for your restored vision when James smiles, dazzling as usual. 
“Anything for you,” he replies gallantly. He angles his head, pressing a quick kiss to your lips. Then another, more lingering than the first. 
“Don’t you have to get to practice?” 
James hums. “You know how I thought it was dark outside? Turns out we’d closed the curtains.” 
779 notes · View notes
copinghex · 15 days
Text
Sincerely yours, me | T.S
Summary: Tommy receives anonymous gifts and letters. All the signs point to a single conclusion - he has a secret admirer.
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The first gift was misinterpreted, as harmless as it could be, a man like Tommy wouldn't simply eat anything sent to him.
Sitting in the kitchen with a cup of tea, Polly waited for Tommy to get home. On the table, a delicate box from a nearby bakery and a letter caught everyone's attention, not only for the gesture but also the date.
If anyone would search for Thomas Shelby in city registers, all they'd find would be his army register, indicating his date of birth was 19th September, months earlier than the true date, a cold Wednesday morning of November. Whoever sent the gift was close enough to the family to not be fooled by the erroneous papers.
That day, Tommy entered the kitchen in quick steps, unconsciously or not, he always worked more on his birthday, not being particularly fond of celebrating.
“Is anything special about the age of thirty?” Polly asked.
“...no,” noticing the suspicious gifts on the table, Tommy reached for the letter, the envelope contained no information other than his own name, “who bought this?”
“No one, it was left on the door this morning,” she turned the box to show him the bakery’s name, “the place isn't cheap, they wouldn't leave it at the door without someone to collect it,”
“So someone ordered and left it at the door,” Tommy concluded.
“What does the letter say?”
The first thing Tommy noticed was the calligraphy, it wasn't neat nor horrendous. He could see the author tried their best to look nice.
Dear Tommy,
Originally, I was excited to write you this letter. Now that I have your cake and shall deliver it tomorrow, it makes me question if this was a good idea.
I believe birthdays are meant to be celebrated with those we have dearly. You seem to think otherwise, nevertheless, I hope you (and your family) enjoy the flavor I picked.
I wish I had bought you a gift as well, I had an eye on a pocket watch from a pawnshop in London, it'd seat nicely with a brown three piece you have, unfortunately my budget is not endless.
I hope you enjoy your birthday and wish you all the happiness, prosperity and good fortune.
Sincerely yours, me.
P.S I've taken notice I mentioned the cake spent a day in my house, if the thought ever crosses your head, do not worry, it cannot have spoiled, I kept it on the ice box all the time ♡
“So?” Polly questioned.
“Take a look at the calligraphy,” he handed her the letter, “does it look familiar?”
“Not at all, I can check in the books, but it's too neat to belong to any of our men, also there's a heart in the end,”
“Alright,” he sighed, “I want you to go to the bakery and ask who ordered it, then ask all the neighbors about the person who left it at the door, anything is useful,”
“Oh, for Christ's sake! I've things to do but to investigate a birthday cake!”
“Polly,” Tommy opened the box, “whoever sent this is watching from close, what do they plan to do with all this information? It can't be good,”
“Alright,” she sighed, “I'll ask, but I bet is nothing more than some of the neighbors’ daughters wearing her heart out for you,”
“Fucking finally,” John suddenly entered the kitchen, “Polly said we'd only eat when you arrived,”
“No one is going to eat,” he looked at the cake, the white topping could be easily deduced as vanilla while the bottom was chocolate.
“What?! What not?”
“We don't know who fucking sent this, it can be poisoned,”
“Or someone wants to send a message,” Polly added.
“Or it's just fucking cake,” John argued, “ugh, forget it,”
As John left, Tommy threw the box in the trash, the light sweet scent rose up to his nose and looking superficially, it seemed like nothing but an innocently sent birthday gift. He wouldn't risk it though, if he was wrong about it, it'd be shameful to die over a piece of cake.
Weeks went by without further information, all the bakery was able to tell was that the person who made the order was a woman, nothing they hadn't already deduced. The dust settled, with no signs of danger or special dates coming by, nothing disturbed Tommy's routine.
The second gift was delivered by Scudboat, at the end of a shift in the betting shop he sneaked his head into Tommy's tiny office with a bulky envelope.
“Tom? I'm going home,” he said.
“See you tomorrow,” Tommy didn't lift his eyes from the papers on the desk.
“Someone left this on my desk today, it's for you,”
His shoulders dropped in a tired move, one more problem was everything he didn't need, “Who did? Did you see?”
“No, we had a full house today, I'm sorry, man,” Scudboat left.
First, a wooden horse fell from the paper. The delicate miniature wasn't bigger than a pocket watch, but the details revealed it was made by talented hands.
Dear Tommy,
Although throwing the whole cake away did offend me, I admit I'm the one at fault for this huge miscalculation, I have no enemies myself and yet, I'd be hesitant to eat something anonymously sent to my door.
Therefore, please accept this horse as a gift instead. It sat dusting up on my shelf for way too long, if you ask me, it resembles Monaghan boy.
Sincerely yours, me.
Tommy placed the miniature in the corner of his desk, it immediately set amongst his other belongings as if it was made to be there.
Slightly crumbling the paper, he fought the urge of ripping it apart, no harm was done and he couldn't find any subtle threats between the lines, but the thought of being observed made him tremble.
The possibility of someone being truly in love with him crossed his mind and was quickly shaken off. Tommy knew he wasn't lovable, at least not anymore, at most it must be infatuation from a stupid woman.
Putting the letter in a drawer, he carried on with his paperwork.
The third gift came three weeks later, when Tommy thought she had given up on him. A worn out bracelet he recognized from an Appleby fair, years ago he bought one for Greta Jurossi and managed to sneak up some more while the seller turned around to get his change. He remembered distributing them amongst her friends.
Those faces were all blurred in Tommy's memory now, shadows from a past that seemed so distant it felt like another life.
The envelope wasn't neat like the previous ones either, delivered by Ada herself, all she offered as explanation was an entertained smile and a “read the letter, Tom”
Relief washed over him learning that Ada was the one collecting information. The worry’s weight left his shoulders and then, the whole scenario felt as laughable as a joke.
Tommy,
It has come to my attention that my letters do you more harm than good. What a shame, I had planned to toy with you a while longer, but seeming it doesn't have the expected effect, I believe there's no option other than revealing myself.
I assure you I never intended harm and Ada was of great help in keeping an eye on you. Please, do not be upset at her, she was manipulated by having me watching Karl whenever needed.
Thomas, you are very dear to me, I've made it clear through the last few months, because of it, I'll be at the Garrison this Friday from 17:00 to 18:00, at the last table in the corner, we've never been complete strangers so you'll recognize me.
All I ask you is to not show up with selfish intentions, to mock me or satisfy your curiosity. I want to be someone close to you, someone you trust and perhaps like. If this possibility exists, come meet me, if your heart is permanently closed, I understand, but please do not come.
Sincerely yours, //////////
Tommy slowly put the letter down, the red scribbles where her name should be evoked sympathy within him. He imagined a simple girl, a silhouette between Greta's friends, switching pen colors and ruining the end of a tidy letter.
Lighting up a cigarette, he rubbed his tense brow, decisions that involved others were always harder and he doubted he'd get used to it someday.
He also couldn't deny curiosity was eating him alive, he needed to know who was sweet enough to look away from the atrocities he committed after France and still love the man he became.
Love, the word sounded so foreign to him he made a decision. He'd go to the encounter, even if he wasn't sure he wanted a relationship, having someone who loved him would be useful.
The week went by fast, around a quarter to five Tommy ordered everyone out of the Garrison, two cups and a whiskey bottle waited with him. He wouldn't define what he felt as excitement, perhaps satisfaction in finally closing that case.
Leaning on the counter, he stared at the doors, a hesitant shadow showed up on the glass panel, the knob moved down and a few seconds passed until she got in.
Her eyes widened seeing the pub empty, a shiver ran down her spine as her eyes met his squinted ones. She gulped, frozen at the entry. Tommy sized her up and his gaze softened, an afternoon tea at the Jurossi’s house years ago, he'd barely noticed her, apparently she had noticed him.
“You came,” she greeted.
“I was curious,”
“Tommy, I asked you to not-”
“Yeah,” he interrupted, “it was brave of you to keep me in the dark for so long,”
“It was barely two months,”
“Could've been much more if so you decided,”
“Why would I? You didn't see to enjoy my… admiration at all,”
Pouring them drinks, Tommy called her to the counter. She shyly smiled as he handed her a glass and made a tiny toast.
“It was clever,” he complimented, “I recruit clever people,”
“So this is business focused?” she looked down, disappointed.
“Amongst other things,” with his glass, he lifted her chin, “I think we can achieve great things together,”
134 notes · View notes
jeankluv · 3 months
Text
But daddy I love him - Gojo Satoru [epilogue]
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short series
summary: If there was a phrase that could describe you, it was; good girl. You had been a good girl all your life, following your father's orders and being as modest as possible. You had focused your entire life on being a perfect lady, one who could be a good wife in the future. This is how you had been raised and how you had been instructed. But your whole world was shaken when one warm summer morning, your eyes met the bold, defiant and sharp gaze of a young man with white hair.
tags: +18, female!reader, set in 1700s-1800s, loss of virginity, misogyny language and thinking, oral sex, fingering, innocent oc, unsafe sex, vaginal sex, manipulative, eating disorders, abusive parents, no use of y/n, pregnancy talks
words: 3,6k
notes: so here is the epilogue of this short series that was a gif to everyone that started supporting my works on this app. Finally we close the story of Duke Gojo and angel. I hope everyone enjoys it 💋
ch.01 | ch.02 | ch.03 | ch.04 | ch.05 | epilogue
Jujutsu Kaisen materialist
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It had been 8 months since you and Satoru met again. And as soon as Satoru could walk again you got married, it had been a bigger wedding than you had ever imagined, after all Satoru was a duke and a close friend of the prince so it had been something normal. Thanks to the wedding you also learned that Satoru was not as hated as your parents had made you believe, in fact Satoru was extremely loved by everyone.
Regarding your parents, you know that they were stripped of their titles and all their property and sent, along with others, to a prison near the border. Satoru didn't want you to see them, apparently they had completely lost their minds and he didn't consider it safe for you.
Satoru asked you if you wanted to stay with your parents' house, and go there during the summers. But although you will love that landscape and the smell of that place, the memories of those walls were mostly painful.
But those memories had been locked in a box and kept far away. Now you were creating new memories in that place you called home. You had arrived at the Gojo residence in winter and for the first time you had admired the snow. And you also met Megumi, Satoru’s nephew. Although the relationship they both had was more of a father-son relationship, after all Satoru had adopted him and taken care of him since he was 4 years old.
In those 8 months you had managed to feel at home and feel that you belonged to the family. Rose kept telling you how happy you looked, how bright you were again. And you also felt it like that.
Satoru had kept all his promises, from a library that you could never imagine to a summer house where you could enjoy the sea breeze again.
Now summer was starting again and that only brought back memories of how last year you were on the beach reading and a boy with a mysterious smile and sharp gaze approached you. Without knowing very well that that meeting would change everything about you.
“What’s my beautiful wife doing?” You felt how Satoru left wet kisses on your shoulder.
“I was just admiring the view and thinking.” You looked at him with a shiny smile.
“Thinking about what, my love?” He looked at you with the most loving expression.
“About us, about everything that has happened in the last year and how lucky I am.” You kissed him.
“I think I’m the one who is lucky.” He said.
Satoru began to kiss your neck, closing your eyes and pushed your neck back, giving him more space so he could devour you. You could spend years, but you would still be addicted to his kisses and his caresses.
“You know this white dress you are wearing today is driving me crazy.” He said, biting your ear.
“I thought it was cute for our getaway today.” You purred with a smile on your lips.
“Oh definitely it’s cute.” He smiled. “But I bet you look cuter without it.”
You could listen to Satoru say provocative things a thousand and one times and never get used to it. Despite the time, you continued getting nervous and blushing like the first time.
“Satoru…” You put your hand on his chest, feeling his buildup muscles under your hand. “We are on the beach.”
“That makes it even more exciting.” He smirked. “But no one will come, you know that.”
“You can't be satisfied, can you?”
“I will never get enough of you, my angel.” He says, before devouring your mouth again.
Satoru laid you down on the cloth that you had brought to sit on the sand and left a trail of kisses until he reached the cloth that separates your breasts from his lips. With a wicked smile on Satoru's face, he grabbed the hem of your dress and pulled it down, exposing your breasts to his blue eyes.
“So beautiful.” He whispered before introducing your nipple into his mouth and beginning to devour it only as he knew how.
Your back arched and your hands went straight to his hair, where they became tangled in the white hair. With each suck you felt your pussy getting wetter and wetter. You desperately needed Satoru inside of you.
“Satoru…” You moaned. “I need you.”
Satoru separated from you and smiled when he saw your state, disheveled, swollen lips, your nipples completely red and with your legs open, inviting him to enter. Taking off his belt and pulling down his pants, you felt your body react as his cock emerged from his underwear. It was hard, you could see it, very hard.
Satoru lifted your dress and yanked your underwear off, leaving you completely exposed to him. With his hand on his cock, he placed it at your entrance and with a grunt he entered you.
You purred as you felt Satoru fill you and begin to thrust into you. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you reached out, your fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him closer, needing to feel the warmth of his skin and becoming one with each other.
His warm touch made you melt under his touch. Not only that, you become more desperate for more, wanting all of him to fill you, to kiss you, to adore you with passion. And you could see his hungry eyes, his frenetic pulse and desperate touch. He wanted you as much as you wanted him.
The shockwaves that ran through your body, made tears of pleasure run down your cheeks and inevitably made moans escape from your throat. Which luckily for you were silenced by the noise of the waves crashing against the coast.
Satoru growled your name with each thrust, his voice rough and full of intensity. The sound sent shivers down your spine, a mix of pleasure and anticipation washing over you. His hands, large and possessive, dug into the flesh of your thighs, leaving marks you would probably see the next day.
Every movement was deliberate and powerful, the rhythm relentless and intoxicating. You could feel the heat radiating from his body, the tension in his muscles as he held you, his almost desperate grip on you.
Your mind struggled to keep up with the overwhelming sensations, each one more intense than the last.
Satoru's eyes met yours, his gaze was filled with hunger and that turned you on even more. His breathing became labored, you knew you were both close, you could feel it by the way he was throbbing inside you and the way your body was reacting.
Satoru spoke your name desperately with each of his thrusts, the way he said your name made your heart race even faster, and your breathing quickened with every movement.
His hands grabbed your hips with a possessive intensity, anchoring you against the sand that was under that fabric.
“Satoru.” You breathed, your voice shaking with the overwhelming sensation coursing through your body. His lips found yours again, swallowing your cries with a searing kiss that left you both breathless.
The desperation in his thrusts grew, each one more urgent and insistent than the last. Your nails dug into his skin, leaving marks.
You could feel the spiral of pleasure tightening inside you, his every movement pushing you closer to the edge. His name was a song on your lips, a plea and a prayer.
When your climax finally hit you, it was like a wave crashing over you, sweeping you away in a torrent of bliss. Your cries of ecstasy mixed with Satoru's guttural moans as he followed you to the edge, his release a powerful, consuming force.
Panting and trembling, they held each other, the aftershocks of their passion still coursing through their bodies.
Your chest rose and fell as you felt Satoru fill you. After a few seconds, Satoru pulled out of you and lay down next to you.
“Stop taking that medicine.” You said, still feeling your voice shaky and your body trembling.
Satoru turned to look at you confused. “What?”
You sighed and adjusted your dress back to how it was. “I heard you, with the doctor.” Satoru sat down. “I know you have been taking that medicine to prevent me from getting pregnant. And I know you did it because I was weak when we got married.” You said. “But ever since coming here, I gained weight and got healthier. Satoru, I want us to have a bigger family.”
“Angel…” He held your hand.
“Megumi has been asking me for a sibling you know?” You smiled. “And I really want it.”
“Megumi has said that?”
You nodded happily. “I want Megumi to have a little brother or sister. Don’t you?”
“I…” Satoru sighed and then looked back at you. “Yeah of course I would love that, but… you know how risky pregnancies can be.” Satoru’s eyes reflected concern, agony and fear. “What if…”
“Satoru.” You tried to calm him down. “I know the risks and I know what could happen but I think I’m ready.” You smiled.
Satoru sighed. “We will talk with the doctor and we will see, alright?”
You nodded and hugged him. “I love you.”
He chuckled and smiled back. “I love you too.”
You both hugged each other until the sun started to set down and the temperature of the day started to go down. Satoru picked you up bridal style and between laughter and soft kisses he carried you to the horse to return home. It sounded good, home.
It filled your heart with a warmth that you didn't know you could feel and a longing to return that you had never experienced. Normally you would extend your readings on the beach until the last ray of sunlight disappeared and the stars began to shine.
But at the Gojo residence, when you had to go out to attend to matters like the Duchess you were, you returned home with Satoru, with Megumi, who you could say had become almost like your own son, with Rose, Nanami and the household employees, who had given you affection and love from the first moment.
Entering the large hall you were greeted by several of the employees, including Rose, who had had a special glow for some time and you both knew what it meant.
“Ask the doctor to come tomorrow.” You heard Satoru speak.
“Duchess.” Rose bowed, you were still not used to that title and it still felt weird.
“Rose.” You smiled. “Did Megumi have his dinner?”
She shook her head. “He is waiting for both of you to have dinner together.”
You looked over to Satoru and this one smiled at you. “Let’s have dinner.” He held your hand.
You both walked to the dining room where you found Megumi concentrating on reading a book. Satoru looked at you and you gave him a warm smile.
“Gumi.” You called out to him and he quickly looked up from him to look at you both.
“Mom.” He put the book aside and ran over to you to hug your legs.
You still weren't used to Megumi calling you mom, the first time she said it you were completely paralyzed, not knowing how to respond or act, Megumi noticed that and regretted it but you told him that he did want to call you mom and then you would be very happy. And since then he had called you mom. On the other hand, Satoru was offended, since for years he had been trying to get Megumi to stop calling him simply Gojo, but the little boy didn't want to.
“I’m still offended that you don’t even call me uncle.” Satoru murmured.
You chuckled looking at Megumi. “Just give him time, right Gumi?” Megumi simply hide his face on your dress.
“A little bird told me that you want a brother or sister. But that won’t happen until you call me uncle.” Satoru challenged him and Megumi turned his face away from your dress and looked at him offended.
“Not fair.” He said.
“It is not.” Satoru smirked. “You just have to call me from now on uncle and you might have a sibling.”
“Satoru… you can not do that.” You said to him.
“Why not?” He looked at you with puppy eyes.
“He is a kid, give him time.” You said.
“Dad…”
“Yeah but why call me Gojo when…” Satoru paused and looked at Megumi. “What?”
“I’m not repeating myself.” Megumi walked away.
“Angel, did he just?”
“Yeah.” You smiled at him and noticed how Satoru was getting emotional. “Satoru…”
“Sorry, I just.” He shook his head. “I love you Gumi.” He shouted.
Megumi didn’t turn to look at him or say anything, but you knew that he was just embarrassed. Megumi opened out at you a few days after calling you mom from the first time about how he wanted to call Satoru dad but he was beyond embarrassed to do it. You found that heartwarming and adorable and seeing how they both reacted filled your heart with happiness and love.
The evening passed quickly between laughter, light conversations and Satoru's jokes and Megumi's protests for Satoru to leave him alone. You knew Satoru wasn't going to let go of the fact that Megumi called him dad and you felt a little sorry for him but it was fun to see his pout. Those new memories that you were creating with those new people that you didn't know a year ago filled your entire heart.
The next day the light passed through the curtains of your room, making you open your eyes to find the bed empty and the sheets cold, indicating that Satoru had woken up long before you. With your hips a little sore after your sex session last night, you got up to get ready to meet the doctor on that sunny morning with clear skies. Rose, like every morning I come into your room and help you.
Once ready, you left your bedroom and began to walk through the Gojo family's large house, still not getting used to all the wealth that you saw when you walked through the wide hallways, with their high ceilings and walls covered in ancestral portraits. .
Approaching the entrance you watched as Satoru walked near the large windows, his expression was a mix of concern and determination. Approaching him, you held his hand and gave him a comforting look, seeking for his agitated soul to relax under your touch.
The heavy entrance doors creaked open and the family doctor entered, whose presence attracted attention. Dr. Stone was a middle-aged man, with a kind but serious demeanor.
“Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Gojo.” Dr. Stone greeted with a respectful nod. His voice was calm and reassuring, a stark contrast to the turmoil you felt inside. “I trust you're both okay.”
“Good morning, Dr. Stone.” Satoru responded, his voice was firm despite the tension. “Thanks for coming.”
Walking down a hallway, the three of you entered an office where you could have a more private conversation. The doctor sat across from you, opened his case, and arranged his instruments with practiced precision. “So what was it that you wanted to talk about?”
You both looked at each other and Satoru took a breath. “We want to try to have a child.” You squeezed his hand. “And we wanted to know if my wife, well, if she doesn't run any significant risk by getting pregnant.”
Dr. Stone nodded and began his examination with a gentle, professional touch. After a few minutes he looked at you both and smiled. “There are certain risks, though.” He said he. “With careful monitoring and appropriate measures, I believe a successful pregnancy is within reach. It will require diligence and caution, but I am confident we can manage any complications that may arise.”
Satoru, who had been watching intently, let out a breath that he didn't realize he was holding. “Thank you, Dr. Stone.” He said with relief. “We appreciate his guidance and support.”
The doctor agreed, with an expression of understanding and empathy. “It is my duty and honor to serve this family. We will proceed with care.”
With a final bow, the doctor departs, leaving you and Satoru to digest the information. The room seemed to breathe a collective sigh of relief, the tension dissipating like morning mist under the heat of the sun.
“Satoru...” You whispered looking at his expression.
But all the doubts you might have dissipated when you saw how Satoru smiled widely at you. "We could start now, don't you think?"
You rolled your eyes. “Always so needy”
Satoru's eyes, electric and searing, met yours with an intensity that made your heart race. He closed the distance between you in the blink of an eye, and taking hold of your face, he pulled you into a passionate kiss. His lips were insistent, full of desire and passion, wanting to claim your lips as his alone.
The kiss deepened, your tongues tangled in a heated dance, each moment fanning the flames of desire and igniting something fervent inside you. His hands slid from your face to your waist, pulling you closer to him, the heat of his body seeping through the layers of your spring dress. You could feel the hard lines of his muscles, his need for you as palpable as yours.
Without breaking the kiss, Satoru's hands began to work on the zippers of your dress. The fabric gave way under his skillful fingers, sliding down your shoulders until it reached your waist. The cool air of the room sent a shiver down your spine as he collided with your bare skin, but it was quickly replaced by the warmth of his touch as he explored your skin.
With a grunt, Satoru pushed aside the objects cluttering the desk. His strength and urgency left you breathless, your pulse pounding in your ears as he lifted you off the desk.
You moaned softly as his lips moved to your neck, sucking and nipping at the sensitive skin. His hands roamed your body, hiking up your dress until he bunched around your waist, exposing your legs. Each touch sent shivers of pleasure through you, your body arching against his in an invitation for him to continue.
Satoru's fingers found the hem of your underwear, teasing the delicate fabric before sending it somewhere in the room. You clung to his shoulders, your nails digging into his back as you writhed in pleasure, each touch bringing you closer to the edge.
With a final, desperate kiss, Satoru pulled away just enough to throw off his own clothes. Seeing him, naked and magnificent before you, made your heart skip a beat. He moved between your legs, his hands gripping your hips as he aligned himself with you, his eyes locked on yours with a burning intensity.
“You ready?” He whispered, full of need.
You could only nod, your breathing ragged as anticipation tightened within you. Satoru's lips captured yours in a searing kiss as he thrust into you, filling you completely. The sensation was overwhelming, an avalanche of pleasure that made you arch against him, your moans mixing with his moans of satisfaction.
He set a rhythm that was both tender and demanding, each movement taking you higher, the friction of his body against yours igniting sparks of ecstasy. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer as you surrendered to the waves of pleasure washing over you. His name was a breathless plea on your lips, a mantra of desire and need.
“Oh my lovely angel.” He said against your ear. “Can’t wait to fill you up with my baby.” You moaned loudly feeling how he grew bigger inside of you.
“Satoru.” Your body moved closer to him, wanting to be touch.
“So needy, my baby.” He said. “You want that right?” You bite your lips as he started to bite the skin of your neck. “You want me to put a baby in you huh?”
“Yes!” You moaned. “Satoru!”
Satoru's pace quickened, his thrusts becoming more urgent, more desperate. With one last thrust your back arched and you felt Satoru come completely inside you. The room that just a few minutes ago had been filled with the sound of your voices agonizing from pleasure and your skin colliding, had now been plunged into a sea of ​​silence that was only interrupted by the soft sound of your breaths mixing, while you searched for it to return to normal.
“You know I love you?” He whispered against your now sweaty skin.
You smiled and touched his hair with love. “And I love you too.” You kissed his hair. “Thank you…”
“For what?” He looked at you with his eyes full of curiosity.
“For that day, for coming to me while reading and making me fall in love with you, for everything Satoru.” You smiled.
He shook his head and cupped your face with cherish and love. “I should be the one thanking you angel.” He smiled. “You don’t know how you change my life. I love you so much.”
And both of your lips connected in a sweet kiss full of love, understanding and commitment for one another. You were grateful for going out that day to read on the beach, for looking at those blue eyes, for going out to the back garden despite the warnings, for your heart, your body and your soul reacting to him. You were grateful that man was yours and you were hers.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Extra scene
You watched as Satoru whipped his tears away and Megumi looked at him with a weird expression, you wanted to laugh about the scene but your body was too exhausted to make a single movement, even for a simple laugh.
“You are going to scare her with that face.” Megumi said.
Satoru, still crying, shook his head. “Gumi, I can't help it. Look at your sister, she is so small.”
Megumi looked at her and nodded in agreement. “She is cute. Thankfully she looks like mom and not you.”
Satoru gasped offended and looked at you. “Did you hear that?” You hummed in response and Satoru walked towards you. “How are you feeling, my angel?” He sat down next to you.
“A bit tired.” You smiled. “But… she is finally here with us.”
“She is.” Satoru looked over to where your newborn baby girl was. “You did a great job.” He held your hand. “Thank you.”
Heavily you approached him and kissed him. “Thanks to you Satoru. I love you."
Satoru smiled. “How lucky I am that a woman as amazing as you wants to spend the rest of her life with me. I love you too my angel.” He whispered and kissed you again.
The kiss was interrupted by some small cries and you both smiled, realizing the new stage that awaited you.
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Final note: thank you for the love and support ❤️ I have another Gojo fic called Birdie if you want to check it out, also a new Geto fic called The forgotten boy
🏷️: @catobsessedlady @zoeyflower @lavender-hvze @slashersgirlypop @tinydonkeysforlife @oddball08 @tttttttf @crybabytoru @fccxxxcvvx @augustine13028 @alwaysfreakingout @storacy
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itoshiexx · 1 year
Text
make a wish
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synopsis: when you throw a surprise birthday party for rin, he blows the candles and makes a wish only you can turn into reality.
pairing: itoshi rin x fem!reader | words: 1.9k | warnings: childhood friends to (implied) lovers, cursing (rin being rin), rin tells bachira to die (jokingly!!), tooth rotting fluff, kissing, no pronouns but reader is refered as woman and girlfriend once
notes: is my bar exam tomorrow? yes. did i stop reviewing to write this? also yes. happy birthday to my favorite boy ever aka the love of my life aka itoshi pookie rin, I LOVE HIM TO DEATH!!!
masterlist
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rin never really cared about his birthday. 
perhaps things were different when he was young, a naive little boy who hadn’t seen the hurt in life and didn’t know the feeling of self hate in such an intrinsic way. but as he grew up, celebrating the day he was born stopped making sense, and eventually his parents stopped trying to throw him parties or do anything special at all. 
as his best friend since childhood, you knew very well about rin’s change of heart, and you respected his wish of not wanting to celebrate. however, that never refrained you from wishing him a happy birthday, even going as far as buying him a little gift sometimes. rin tried to pretend to hate it, but the truth is that he craved hearing those two words from you. no one else’s mattered. 
that being said, he was totally not upset that you forgot his birthday. why would he? it was just a stupid date like any other. well, you never forgot any of his special days ever since he was six, but… so what if you didn’t remember this one? it was fine. rin didn’t care.
(he really fucking cared).
the lights on his bedroom were off, and the younger itoshi found himself moping on his bed, staring at the ceiling as if it could grant his heart’s deepest desires. as if on cue, the noise of a notification ringed through the darkness, and rin begrudgingly picked up his phone to see that you messaged him. he immediately sat up, eyes wide, heart making somersaults inside of his chest. 
the message wasn’t the “happy birthday, rinnie!” that he was secretly expecting.
n/n heyyyy can u come over?
rin scoffed. how dare you ask him to come over to your place if you didn’t even wish him a happy birthday? it was 7pm, for fucks sake — you had plenty of time. he should say no. he was going to say no. but he knew that, no matter how upset he was, there wasn’t a bone in his body that was able to deny you. so he just texted a quick “on my way” before grabbing his car keys and heading to your place. 
the familiar sight of your apartment brought warmth to rin’s chest; your place felt a lot more like home than his own house. he supposed it had something to do with you, though he would never admit that. quickly parking his car, he passed the building entrance and made his way towards the elevator, clicking the button to your floor. his phone vibrated again. 
n/n the door is open, u can come in
he frowned with your recklessness. you were a young woman living alone — how could you leave your door unlocked? it was fucking dangerous! he really needed to scold you for that. it was all he could think about as he twisted the doorknob, already speaking without noticing the lights were off.
“for fucks sake, y/n, would it kill you to lock this fucking door? i told you a million times that it’s dangerous—”
“SURPRISE!”
the lights went on, revealing all of his teammates wearing stupid party hats, confetti flying through the air and your gracious figure in the middle, holding a cake with teal frosting and lit candles. 
what the…?
rin completely froze. his eyes were wide, scanning the room, mind still trying to process what was going on. his body was rigid as no one had ever seen before, and the boys started to gossip between themselves.
“i think we broke him,” bachira whispered. at his side, isagi and reo snickered. 
knowing maybe your best friend was a bit overwhelmed, you slowly approached him until you managed to be the only thing in his field of vision. little did you know that rin always had his eyes on you — he was attracted to your aura like the planets were drawn to the sun. 
“happy birthday, rinnie,” you said, a bit sheepish. carefully, you let the cake on the living room table, having free hands to hug him by the waist. that seemingly broke him from his stupor, as rin instinctively hugged you back and stared at you, mouth still gaping like a fish.
“you… you remembered…”
you grimaced. “of course i did! what do you take me for, itoshi rin?”
“usually you text me as soon as it’s midnight, but you didn’t this time,” he stated, simply. it made you grin.
“aww, was lil’ old rinnie waiting for my message?”
he felt his cheeks heating up, and he pushed your body away before you could hear how fast his heart was beating. “shut up. it’s just weird to not have your dumbass bothering me.”
you laughed. “sure, pretty boy. whatever you say.”
rin’s teammates quickly surrounded him, giving him pats on the back and congratulations. some even brought gifts, though rin told isagi to “eat dick” when the striker handed him a wrapped box. however, despite his harsh words, you could see the inconspicuous smile threatening to break from his face, and that alone made you smile, heart full.
“let’s sing happy birthday!” isagi screamed amongst the commotion, making you remember that you left the cake at the living room table and the candles had most likely been wiped out. 
“no way,” you heard rin say. “i don’t want that shit.”
“oh, come on, rin-chan!” bachira clinged to rin’s shoulders. “y/n-chan went all the way to make you a super special birthday party. you gotta follow the rules, buddy!”
“go die.”
your little laugh brought rin out of his angry stupor, and when he turned around, his breath hitched. now that he wasn’t in a complete state of shock, he could see your delicate features lightened up by the soft glow of the candles, and the gentle smile that made your eyes crease and his heart race every time. and you were looking at him. 
(you were always looking at him).
the guests started singing happy birthday, but rin could only listen to the soft tune coming out of your mouth, as if you two were the only ones in the place. before he could register, the song was over, and everyone was staring at him expectantly. 
“make a wish, rinnie.”
he stared at you for a few seconds, before finally closing his eyes and blowing the candles. everyone cheered, and he couldn’t help letting out a small smile.
idiots, he thought. a whole bunch of idiots.
once the initial shock went by, the party went on normally, with lots of drinking, chatting and the usual bickering. you cut the cake into several pieces and put the slices on small plates, so that everyone could enjoy the sweet flavor. music blasted through the stereo, making bachira and kunigami start a dancing competition, and their moves were so weird your belly hurt from all the laughing. rin was leaning against the wall watching everything with an amused expression.
hours later, as the celebration started to die down, some of rin’s teammates had already gone home, and your apartment was slightly emptier. after saying goodbye to reo and nagi, rin looked around in an attempt to find you, furrowing his eyebrows when he didn’t succeed. 
chigiri quickly noticed his expression, nudging him with his elbow. 
“your girlfriend is on the balcony.”
rin’s grimace worsened. “she’s not my girlfriend.”
isagi, standing at chigiri’s side, only smirked. “not yet.”
the younger itoshi only rolled his eyes, showing him a middle finger. “fuck off, shithead.”
but he followed to the balcony anyway.
as he opened the door, the slight chill of the wind made him wince. he saw your figure leaning on the railing, arms bare due to your choice of outfit — you were beautiful, as always, but it didn’t really match the weather. he didn’t think twice before taking off his jacket and placing them on your shoulders, announcing his arrival. 
you tilted your head up, looking at him with those bambi eyes that nearly made him lose his mind. and then you smiled, getting cozy on his jacket, and he thought he might faint right there. 
fuck, the things you did to him.
“hey there, birthday boy. enjoying your party?”
“it’s cool, i guess.” he shrugged. with his answer, you diverted your gaze to the view, fidgeting with your fingers. he didn’t like your anxiousness.
“i’m sorry if i… you know, if i overstepped.” he gave you a puzzled look. “i know you don’t like to celebrate your birthday, but i thought you deserved to have something cool for once. i just wanted your day to be special.”
rin went silent, your words making his cheeks flush and his heart beat impossibly faster. you were always like this: so thoughtful, so caring… he didn’t even deemed himself worthy of it, yet you seemed to find something decent to cherish.
the words came out broken from his dry mouth, “every day is special if i’m with you.”
your eyes widened slightly, and you finally turned to face him. he took your flustered expression as a good sign, and gathered every ounce of boldness and ego he could manage, “you didn’t give me a gift, though.”
you rolled your eyes, giggling, and twisted your body so that you were facing each other. “is the party not enough, mr. egoist?”
“you answered that for yourself.” he smirked, taking a step closer. 
there was now very little between you both. you could smell his expensive cologne and feel his breath in your face, and you had to fight the urge to cower from those deep aquamarine eyes that left you mesmerized. 
“very well, then. what do you want as a gift?” you asked, mentally praising yourself for not stuttering. 
however, you nearly choked when his eyes went down and stared at your mouth, coming back up only to show a swirl of emotions. desire. affection. love, dare you say. he came even closer, his hands finding home in your hips, and yours instinctively went to his chest. 
“close your eyes,” he whispered, the minty smell of his breath filling all your senses. you obeyed, because itoshi rin had such a grip on you it was nearly ridiculous. 
and then, his lips found yours, delicate and gentle like only you knew he could be. rin kissed you as if you were the only thing that could sate him, as if you were what he has been craving all along. and you kissed him back to let him know you felt the same. 
your arms circled his neck and his hands went up to your waist, tugging you impossibly closer and making you yelp. he took the opportunity to invade your mouth with his tongue, sensually caressing yours in a loving dance, savoring all of you like he wanted for a long time. 
fuck, he thought, it was only the first time and he was already addicted. he couldn’t stop kissing you even if he tried, and even though he intended to steal just one kiss, he was indeed a greedy man — especially when it came to you.
alas, when you finally couldn’t handle the lack of air any longer, you parted, with heavy breaths and faces flushed. you touched your foreheads while calming down, basking in the silence and the warmth of each other’s bodies. 
then, rin smiled, slightly incredulous. “huh.”
“what?” you arched your brow, but you couldn’t help but smile as well. 
he pecked your lips one last time. “i guess birthday wishes do come true.”
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© 2023 itoshiexx. do not plagarise, translate, or repost any of my work on here or other sites.
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